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} - a.pagenum { display:none; } - a.pagenum:after { display:none; } -} - -</style> -</head> - -<body> - - -<pre> - -The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Glebe 1914/01 (Vol. 1, No. 4): Love of -One's Neighbor, by Leonid Andreyev - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: The Glebe 1914/01 (Vol. 1, No. 4): Love of One's Neighbor - -Author: Leonid Andreyev - -Editor: Alfred Kreymborg - Man Ray - -Translator: Thomas Seltzer - -Release Date: August 8, 2020 [EBook #62880] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE GLEBE 1914/01 (VOL. 1 *** - - - - -Produced by Jens Sadowski and the Online Distributed -Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net. This book was -produced from images made available by the Blue Mountain -Project, Princeton University. - - - - - - -</pre> - - -<div class="centerpic"> -<img src="images/cover.jpg" alt="" /></div> - -<div class="coverpage"> -<p class="tit"> -Love of One’s Neighbor -</p> - -<p class="journal"> -THE<br /> -GLEBE -</p> - -<p class="issue"> -VOLUME 1<br /> -NUMBER 4 -</p> - -<p class="issue"> -JANUARY<br /> -1914 -</p> - -<p class="price"> -SUBSCRIPTION<br /> -Three Dollars Yearly<br /> -THIS ISSUE 35 CENTS -</p> - -<p class="aut"> -<span class="line1">By Leonid Andreyev</span> -</p> - -</div> - -<div class="frontmatter chapter"> -<p class="first editorial"> -<span class="firstchar">T</span><span class="postfirstchar">he</span> only editorial policy of THE GLEBE is -that embodied in its declaration of absolute -freedom of expression, which makes for a range -broad enough to include every temperament from -the most radical to the most conservative, the only -requisite being that the work should have unmistakable -merit. Each issue will be devoted exclusively -to one individual, thereby giving him an opportunity -to present his work in sufficient bulk to -make it possible for the reader to obtain a much -more comprehensive grasp of his personality than is -afforded him in the restricted space allotted by the -other magazines. Published monthly, or more frequently -if possible, THE GLEBE will issue twelve -to twenty books per year, chosen on their merits -alone, since the subscription list does away with the -need of catering to the popular demand that confronts -every publisher. Thus, THE GLEBE can -promise the best work of American and foreign -authors, known and unknown. -</p> - -<p> -The price of each issue of THE GLEBE will vary -with the cost of publication, but the yearly subscription, -including special numbers, is three dollars. -</p> - -<p class="sign"> -Editor<br /> -ALFRED KREYMBORG -</p> - -</div> - -<div class="frontmatter chapter"> -<p class="halftitle"> -LOVE OF ONE’S NEIGHBOR -</p> - -</div> - -<div class="frontmatter chapter"> -<h1 class="title"> -LOVE OF ONE’S NEIGHBOR -</h1> - -<p class="aut"> -<span class="line1">BY</span><br /> -<span class="line2">LEONID ANDREYEV</span> -</p> - -<p class="trn"> -<span class="line1">AUTHORIZED TRANSLATION BY</span><br /> -<span class="line2">THOMAS SELTZER</span> -</p> - -<div class="centerpic logo"> -<img src="images/logo.jpg" alt="" /></div> - -<p class="pub"> -NEW YORK<br /> -ALBERT AND CHARLES BONI<br /> -96 FIFTH AVENUE<br /> -1914 -</p> - -</div> - -<div class="frontmatter chapter"> -<p class="cop"> -Copyright, 1914<br /> -By<br /> -Albert and Charles Boni -</p> - -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p class="tit2"> -<a id="page-5" class="pagenum" title="5"></a> -LOVE OF ONE’S NEIGHBOR -</p> - -</div> - -<p> -<span class="hdr">Scene.</span> <span class="sd">A wild place in the mountains.</span> -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">A man in an attitude of despair is standing on a -tiny projection of a rock that rises almost sheer -from the ground. How he got there it is not easy to -say, but he cannot be reached either from above or -below. Short ladders, ropes and sticks show that -attempts have been made to save the unknown person, -but without success.</span> -</p> - -<p> -<span class="sd">It seems that the unhappy man has been in that -desperate position a long time. A considerable crowd -has already collected, extremely varied in composition. -There are venders of cold drinks; there is a -whole little bar behind which the bartender skips -about out of breath and perspiring—he has more -on his hands than he can attend to; there are peddlers -selling picture postal cards, coral beads, souvenirs, -and all sorts of trash. One fellow is stubbornly trying -to dispose of a tortoise-shell comb, which is -really not tortoise-shell. Tourists keep pouring in -<a id="page-6" class="pagenum" title="6"></a> -from all sides, attracted by the report that a catastrophe -is impending—Englishmen, Americans, Germans, -Russians, Frenchmen, Italians, etc., with all -their peculiar national traits of character, manner -and dress. Nearly all carry alpenstocks, field-glasses -and cameras. The conversation is in different languages, -all of which, for the convenience of the -reader, we shall translate into English.</span> -</p> - -<p> -<span class="sd">At the foot of the rock where the unknown man -is to fall, two policemen are chasing the children -away and partitioning off a space, drawing a rope -around short stakes stuck in the ground. It is noisy -and jolly.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman.</span> Get away, you loafer! The man’ll -fall on your head and then your mother and father -will be making a hullabaloo about it. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Boy.</span> Will he fall here? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman.</span> Yes, here. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Boy.</span> Suppose he drops farther? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Policeman.</span> The boy is right. He -may get desperate and jump, land beyond the rope -and hit some people in the crowd. I guess he weighs -at least about two hundred pounds. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Policeman.</span> Move on, move on, you! -Where are you going? Is that your daughter, lady? -Please take her away! The young man will soon -fall. -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-7" class="pagenum" title="7"></a> -<span class="speaker">Lady.</span> Soon? Did you say he is going to fall -soon? Oh, heavens, and my husband’s not here! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Little Girl.</span> He’s in the café, mamma. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Lady</span> (<span class="sd">desperately</span>). Yes, of course. He’s always -in the café. Go call him, Nellie. Tell him the -man will soon drop. Hurry! Hurry! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> Waiter!—Garçon—Kellner—Three -beers out here!—No beer?—What?—Say, that’s a -fine bar—We’ll have some in a moment—Hurry -up—Waiter!—Waiter!—Garçon! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Policeman.</span> Say, boy, you’re here again? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Boy.</span> I wanted to take the stone away. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman.</span> What for? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Boy.</span> So he shouldn’t get hurt so badly when he -falls. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Policeman.</span> The boy is right. We -ought to remove the stone. We ought to clear the -place altogether. Isn’t there any sawdust or sand -about? -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">Two English tourists enter. They look at the -unknown man through field-glasses and exchange -remarks.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist.</span> He’s young. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Tourist.</span> How old? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist.</span> Twenty-eight. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Tourist.</span> Twenty-six. Fright has made -him look older. -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-8" class="pagenum" title="8"></a> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist.</span> How much will you bet? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Tourist.</span> Ten to a hundred. Put it -down. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">writing in his note-book. To -the policeman</span>). How did he got up there? Why -don’t they take him off? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman.</span> They tried, but they couldn’t. Our -ladders are too short. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Tourist.</span> Has he been here long? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman.</span> Two days. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist.</span> Aha! He’ll drop at night. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Tourist.</span> In two hours. A hundred to -a hundred. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist.</span> Put it down. (<span class="sd">He shouts to -the man on the rock.</span>) How are you feeling? -What? I can’t hear you. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man</span> (<span class="sd">in a scarcely audible voice</span>). -Bad, very bad. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Lady.</span> Oh, heavens, and my husband is not -here! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Little Girl</span> (<span class="sd">running in</span>). Papa said he’ll get -here in plenty of time. He’s playing chess. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Lady.</span> Oh, heavens! Nellie, tell him he must -come. I insist. But perhaps I had rather— Will -he fall soon, Mr. Policeman? No? Nellie, you -go. I’ll stay here and keep the place for papa. -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">A tall, lanky woman of unusually independent -<a id="page-9" class="pagenum" title="9"></a> -and military appearance and a tourist dispute for the -same place. The tourist, a short, quiet, rather weak -man, feebly defends his rights; the woman is resolute -and aggressive.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> But, lady, it is my place. I have been -standing here for two hours. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> What do I care how long -you have been standing here. I want this place. Do -you understand? It offers a good view, and that’s -just what I want. Do you understand? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">weakly</span>). It’s what I want, too. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> I beg your pardon, what -do you know about these things anyway? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> What knowledge is required? A man -will fall. That’s all. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman</span> (<span class="sd">mimicking</span>). “A man will -fall. That’s all.” Won’t you have the goodness to -tell me whether you have ever seen a man fall? -No? Well, I did. Not one, but three. Two acrobats, -one rope-walker and three aeronauts. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> That makes six. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman</span> (<span class="sd">mimicking</span>). “That makes -six.” Say, you are a mathematical prodigy. And -did you ever see a tiger tear a woman to pieces in a -zoo, right before your eyes? Eh? What? Yes, -exactly. Now, I did— Please! Please! -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">The tourist steps aside, shrugging his shoulders -<a id="page-10" class="pagenum" title="10"></a> -with an air of injury, and the tall woman triumphantly -takes possession of the stone she has won -by her prowess. She sits down, spreading out -around her her bag, handkerchiefs, peppermints, -and medicine bottle, takes off her gloves and wipes -her field-glass, glancing pleasantly on all around. -Finally she turns to the lady who is waiting for her -husband in the café.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman</span> (amiably). You will tire -yourself out, dear. Why don’t you sit down? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Lady.</span> Oh, my, don’t talk about it. My legs are -as stiff as that rock there. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> Men are so rude nowadays. -They will never give their place to a woman. -Have you brought peppermints with you? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Lady</span> (<span class="sd">frightened</span>). No. Why? Is it necessary? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> When you keep looking up -a long time you are bound to get sick. Sure thing. -Have you spirits of ammonia? No? Good gracious, -how thoughtless! How will they bring you -back to consciousness when he falls? You haven’t -any smelling salts either, I dare say. Of course not. -Have you anybody to take care of you, seeing that -you are so helpless yourself? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Lady</span> (<span class="sd">frightened</span>). I will tell my husband. He -is in the café. -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-11" class="pagenum" title="11"></a> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> Your husband is a brute. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman.</span> Whose coat is this? Who threw -this rag here? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Boy.</span> It’s mine. I spread my coat there so that -he doesn’t hurt himself so badly when he falls. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman.</span> Take it away. -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">Two tourists armed with cameras contending -for the same position.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist.</span> I wanted this place. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Tourist.</span> You wanted it, but I got it. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist.</span> You just came here. I have -had this place for two days. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Tourist.</span> Then why did you go without -even leaving your shadow? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist.</span> I wasn’t going to starve myself -to death. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Comb-Vender</span> (<span class="sd">mysteriously</span>). Tortoise-shell. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">savagely</span>). Well? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Vender.</span> Genuine tortoise-shell. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Go to the devil. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Third Tourist, Photographer.</span> For heaven’s -sake, lady, you’re sitting on my camera! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Little Lady.</span> Oh! Where is it? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Under you, under you, lady. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Little Lady.</span> I am so tired. What a wretched -camera you have. I thought it felt uncomfortable -<a id="page-12" class="pagenum" title="12"></a> -and I was wondering why. Now I know; I am -sitting on your camera. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">agonized</span>). Lady! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Little Lady.</span> I thought it was a stone. I saw -something lying there and I thought: A queer-looking -stone; I wonder why it’s so black. So that’s -what it was; it was your camera. I see. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">agonized</span>). Lady, for heaven’s sake! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Little Lady.</span> Why is it so large, tell me. -Cameras are small, but this one is so large. I swear -I never had the faintest suspicion it was a camera. -Can you take my picture? I would so much like to -have my picture taken with the mountains here for a -background, in this wonderful setting. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> How can I take your picture if you -are sitting on my camera? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Little Lady</span> (<span class="sd">jumping up, frightened</span>). Is it -possible? You don’t say so. Why didn’t you tell -me so? Does it take pictures? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> Waiter, one beer!—What did you -bring wine for?—I gave you my order long ago.—What -will you have, sir?—One minute.—In a -second. Waiter!—Waiter—Toothpicks!— -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">A fat tourist enters in haste, panting, surrounded -by a numerous family.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">crying</span>). Mary! Aleck! Jimmie!—Where -is Mary? For God’s sake! Where is Mary? -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-13" class="pagenum" title="13"></a> -<span class="speaker">Student</span> (<span class="sd">dismally</span>). Here she is, papa. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Where is she? Mary! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Girl.</span> Here I am, papa. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Where in the world are you? (<span class="sd">He -turns around.</span>) Ah, there! What are you standing -back of me for? Look, look! For goodness sake, -where are you looking? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Girl</span> (<span class="sd">dismally</span>). I don’t know, papa. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> No, that’s impossible. Imagine! She -never once saw a lightning flash. She always keeps -her eyes open as wide as onions, but the instant it -flashes she closes them. So she never saw lightning, -not once. Mary, you are missing it again. There -it is! You see! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Student.</span> She sees, papa. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Keep an eye on her. (<span class="sd">Suddenly -dropping into tone of profound pity.</span>) Ah, poor -young man. Imagine! He’ll fall from that high -rock. Look, children, see how pale he is! That -should be a lesson to you how dangerous climbing is. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Student</span> (<span class="sd">dismally</span>). He won’t fall to-day, -papa! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Girl.</span> Papa, Mary has closed her eyes -again. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Student.</span> Let us sit down, papa! Upon -my word, he won’t fall to-day. The porter told me -so. I can’t stand it any more. You’ve been -<a id="page-14" class="pagenum" title="14"></a> -dragging us about every day from morning till night -visiting art galleries. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> What’s that? For whose benefit am -I doing this? Do you think I enjoy spending my -time with a dunce? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Girl.</span> Papa, Mary is blinking her eyes -again. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Student.</span> I can’t stand it either. I -have terrible dreams. Yesterday I dreamed of garçons -the whole night long. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Jimmie. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Student.</span> I have gotten so thin I am -nothing but skin and bones. I can’t stand it any -more, father. I’d rather be a farmer, or tend pigs. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Aleck. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Student.</span> If he were really to fall—but -it’s a fake. You believe every lie told you! They -all lie. Baedecker lies, too. Yes, your Baedecker -lies! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Mary</span> (<span class="sd">dismally</span>). Papa, children, he’s beginning -to fall. -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">The man on the rock shouts something down -into the crowd. There is general commotion. -Voices, “Look, he’s falling.” Field-glasses are -raised; the photographers, violently agitated, click -their cameras; the policemen diligently clean the -place where he is to fall.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-15" class="pagenum" title="15"></a> -<span class="speaker">Photographer.</span> Oh, hang it! What is the -matter with me? The devil! When a man’s in a -hurry— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Photographer.</span> Brother, your camera -is closed. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Photographer.</span> The devil take it. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> Hush! He’s getting ready to fall.— -No, he’s saying something.—No, he’s falling.—Hush! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man on the Rock</span> (<span class="sd">faintly</span>). Save -me! Save me! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Ah, poor young man. Mary, Jimmie, -there’s a tragedy for you. The sky is clear, the -weather is beautiful, and has he to fall and be shattered -to death? Can you realize how dreadful that -is, Aleck? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Student</span> (<span class="sd">wearily</span>). Yes, I can realize it. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Mary, can you realize it? Imagine. -There is the sky. There are people enjoying themselves -and partaking of refreshments. Everything -is <a id="corr-1"></a>so nice and pleasant, and he has to fall. What a -tragedy! Do you remember Hamlet? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Girl</span> (<span class="sd">prompting</span>). Hamlet, Prince of -Denmark, of Alsinore. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">James.</span> Of Helsingfors, I know. Don’t bother -me, father! -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-16" class="pagenum" title="16"></a> -<span class="speaker">Mary</span> (<span class="sd">dismally</span>). He dreamed about garçons -all night long. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Aleck.</span> Why don’t you order sandwiches, -father. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Comb-Vender</span> (<span class="sd">mysteriously</span>). Tortoise-shell. -Genuine tortoise-shell. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">credulously</span>). Stolen? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Vender.</span> Why, sir, the idea! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">angrily</span>). Do you mean to tell me it’s -genuine if it isn’t stolen? Go on. Not much. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman</span> (<span class="sd">amiably</span>). Are all these -your children? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Yes, madam. A father’s duty. You -see, they are protesting. It is the eternal conflict -between fathers and children. Here is such a -tragedy going on, such a heart-rending tragedy—Mary, -you are blinking your eyes again. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> You are quite right. Children -must be hardened to things. But why do you -call this a terrible tragedy? Every roofer, when he -falls, falls from a great height. But this here—what -is it? A hundred, two hundred feet. I saw a man -fall plumb from the sky. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">overwhelmed</span>). You don’t say? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Aleck.</span> Children, listen. Plumb from the sky. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> Yes, yes. I saw an aeronaut -<a id="page-17" class="pagenum" title="17"></a> -drop from the clouds and go crash upon an -iron roof. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> How terrible! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> That’s what I call a tragedy. -It took two hours to bring me back to consciousness, -and all that time they pumped water on me, the -scoundrels. I was nearly drowned. From that day -on I never step out of the door without taking spirits -of ammonia with me. -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">Enter a strolling troop of Italian singers and -musicians: a short, fat tenor, with a reddish beard -and large, watery, stupidly dreamy eyes, singing -with extraordinary sweetness; a skinny humpback -with a jockey cap, and a screeching baritone; a bass -who is also a mandolinist, looking like a bandit; a -girl with a violin, closing her eyes when she plays, -so that only the whites are seen. They take their -stand and begin to sing: “Sul mare luccica—Santa -Lucia, Santa Lucia—”</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Mary</span> (<span class="sd">dismally</span>). Papa, children, look. He is -beginning to wave his hands. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Is that the effect the music has upon -him? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> Quite possible. Music -usually goes with such things. But that’ll make him -fall sooner than he should. Musicians, go away -from here! Go! -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-18" class="pagenum" title="18"></a> -(<span class="sd">A tall tourist, with up-curled mustache, violently -gesticulating, enters, followed by a small -group attracted by curiosity.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> It’s scandalous. Why don’t -they save him? Ladies and gentlemen, you all heard -him shout: “Save me.” Didn’t you? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">The Curious</span> (<span class="sd">in chorus</span>). Yes, yes, we heard -him. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> There you are. I distinctly -heard these words: “Save me! Why don’t they -save me?” It’s scandalous. Policemen, policemen! -Why don’t you save him? What are you doing -there? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policemen.</span> We are cleaning up the place for -him to fall. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> That’s a sensible thing to do, -too. But why don’t you save him? You ought to -save him. If a man asks you to save him, it is absolutely -essential to save him. Isn’t it so, ladies and -gentlemen? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">The Curious</span> (<span class="sd">in chorus</span>). True, absolutely -true. It is essential to save him. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">with heat</span>). We are not -heathens, we are Christians. We should love our -neighbors. When a man asks to be saved every -measure which the government has at its command -<a id="page-19" class="pagenum" title="19"></a> -should be taken to save him. Policeman, have you -taken every measure? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman.</span> Every one! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> Every one without exception? -Gentleman, every measure has been taken. Listen, -young man, every measure has been taken to save -you. Did you hear? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man</span> (<span class="sd">in a scarcely audible voice</span>). -Save me! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">excitedly</span>). Gentlemen, did you -hear? He again asked to be saved. Policeman, -did you hear? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">One of the Curious</span> (<span class="sd">timidly</span>). It is my -opinion that it is absolutely necessary to save him. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> That’s right. Exactly. Why, -that’s what I have been saying for the last two -hours. Policeman, do you hear? It is scandalous. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">One of the Curious</span> (<span class="sd">a little bolder</span>). It is my -opinion that an appeal should be made to the highest -authority. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">The Rest</span> (<span class="sd">in chorus</span>). Yes, yes, a complaint -should be made. It is scandalous. The government -ought not to leave any of its citizens in danger. We -all pay taxes. He must be saved. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> Didn’t I say so? Of course -we must put up a complaint. Young man! Listen, -<a id="page-20" class="pagenum" title="20"></a> -young man. Do you pay taxes? What? I can’t -hear. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Jimmie, Katie, listen! What a -tragedy! Ah, the poor young man! He is soon to -fall and they ask him to pay a domiciliary tax. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Kate</span> (<span class="sd">the girl with glasses, pedantically</span>). That -can hardly be called a domicile, father. The meaning -of domicile is— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">James</span> (<span class="sd">pinching her</span>). Lickspittle. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Mary</span> (<span class="sd">wearily</span>). Papa, children, look! He’s -again beginning to fall. -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">There is excitement in the crowd, and again a -bustling and shouting among the photographers.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> We must hurry, ladies and -gentlemen. He must be saved at any cost. Who’s -going with me? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">The Curious</span> (<span class="sd">in chorus</span>). We are all going! -We are all going? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> Policeman, did you hear? -Come, ladies and gentlemen! -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">They depart, fiercely gesticulating. The café -grows more lively. The sound of clinking beer -glasses and the clatter of steins is heard, and the beginning -of a loud German song. The bartender, who -has forgotten himself while talking to somebody, -starts suddenly and runs off, looks up to the sky -with a hopeless air and wipes the perspiration from -<a id="page-21" class="pagenum" title="21"></a> -his face with his napkin. Angry calls of Waiter! -Waiter!</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man</span> (<span class="sd">rather loudly</span>). Can you let -me have some soda water? -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">The waiter is startled, looks at the sky, glances -at the man on the rock, and pretending not to have -heard him, walks away.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Many Voices.</span> Waiter! Beer! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Waiter.</span> One moment, one moment! -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">Two drunken men come out from the café.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Lady.</span> Ah, there is my husband. Come here -quick. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> A downright brute. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Drunken Man</span> (<span class="sd">waving his hand to the unknown -man</span>). Say, is it very bad up there? Hey? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man</span> (<span class="sd">rather loudly</span>). Yes, it’s bad. -I am sick and tired of it. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Drunken Man.</span> Can’t you get a drink? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man.</span> No, how can I? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Drunken Man.</span> Say, what are you -talking about? How can he get a drink? The man -is about to die and you tempt him and try to get -him excited. Listen, up there, we have been drinking -your health right along. It won’t hurt you, -will it? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Drunken Man.</span> Ah, go on! What are -you talking about? How can it hurt him? Why, -<a id="page-22" class="pagenum" title="22"></a> -it will only do him good. It will encourage him. -Listen, honest to God, we are very sorry for you, -but don’t mind us. We are going to the café to -have another drink. Good-bye. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Drunken Man.</span> Look, what a crowd. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Drunken Man.</span> Come, or he’ll fall and -then they’ll close the café. -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">Enter a new crowd of tourists, a very elegant -gentleman, the chief correspondent of European -newspapers at their head. He is followed by an -ecstatic whisper of respect and admiration. Many -leave the café to look at him, and even the waiter -turns slightly around, glances at him quickly, smiles -happily and continues on his way, spilling something -from his tray.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> The correspondent! The correspondent! -Look! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Lady.</span> Oh, my, and my husband is gone again! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Jimmie, Mary, Aleck, Katie, Charlie, -look! This is the chief correspondent. Do you -realize it? The very highest of all. Whatever he -writes goes. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Kate.</span> Mary, dear, again you are not looking. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Aleck.</span> I wish you would order some sandwiches -for us. I can’t stand it any longer. A -human being has to eat. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">ecstatically</span>). What a tragedy! -<a id="page-23" class="pagenum" title="23"></a> -Katie dear, can you realize it? Consider how -awful. The weather is so beautiful, and the chief -correspondent. Take out your note-book, Jimmie. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">James.</span> I lost it, father. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent.</span> Where is he? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices</span> (<span class="sd">obligingly</span>). There, there he is. -There! A little higher. Still higher! A little -lower! No, higher! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent.</span> If you please, if you please, -ladies and gentlemen, I will find him myself. Oh, -yes, there he is. Hm! What a situation! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Won’t you have a chair? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent.</span> Thank you. (<span class="sd">Sits down.</span>) -Hm! What a situation! Very interesting. Very -interesting, indeed. (<span class="sd">Whisks out his note-book; -amiably to the photographers.</span>) Have you taken -any pictures yet, gentlemen? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Photographer.</span> Yes, sir, certainly, certainly. -We have photographed the place showing -the general character of the locality— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Photographer.</span> The tragic situation -of the young man— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent.</span> Ye-es, very, very interesting. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Did you hear, Aleck? This smart -man, the chief correspondent, says it’s interesting, -and you keep bothering about sandwiches. Dunce! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Aleck.</span> May be he has had his dinner already. -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-24" class="pagenum" title="24"></a> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent.</span> Ladies and gentlemen, I beg -you to be quiet. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Obliging Voices.</span> It is quieter in the café. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">shouts to the unknown man</span>). -Permit me to introduce myself. I am the chief -correspondent of the European press. I have been -sent here at the special request of the editors. I -should like to ask you several questions concerning -your situation. What is your name? What is your -general position? How old are you? (<span class="sd">The unknown -man mumbles something.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">a little puzzled</span>). I can’t hear -a thing. Has he been that way all the time? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> Yes, it’s impossible to hear a word he -says. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">jotting down something in -his note-book</span>). Fine! Are you a bachelor? (<span class="sd">The -unknown man mumbles.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent.</span> I can’t hear you. Are you -married? Yes? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> He said he was a bachelor. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Tourist.</span> No, he didn’t. Of course, -he’s married. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">carelessly</span>). You think so? -All right. We’ll put down, married. How many -children have you? Can’t hear! It seems to me -he said three. Hm! Anyway, we’ll put down five. -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-25" class="pagenum" title="25"></a> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Oh, my, what a tragedy. Five children! -Imagine! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> He is lying. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">shouting</span>). How did you get -into this position? What? I can’t hear? Louder! -Repeat. What did you say? (<span class="sd">Perplexed, to the -crowd.</span>) What did he say? The fellow has a -devilishly weak voice. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist.</span> It seems to me he said that he -lost his way. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Tourist.</span> No, he doesn’t know himself -how he got there. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> He was out hunting.—He was climbing -up the rocks.—No, no! He is simply a lunatic! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent.</span> I beg your pardon, I beg -your pardon, ladies and gentlemen! Anyway, he -didn’t drop from the sky. However— (<span class="sd">He -quickly jots down in his note-book.</span>) Unhappy -young man—suffering from childhood with attacks -of lunacy.—The bright light of the full moon—the -wild rocks.—Sleepy janitor—didn’t notice— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">to the second, in a whisper</span>). -But it’s new moon now. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Tourist.</span> Go, what does a layman -know about astronomy. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">ecstatically</span>). Mary, pay attention to -this! You have before you an ocular demonstration -<a id="page-26" class="pagenum" title="26"></a> -of the influence of the moon on living organisms. -What a terrible tragedy to go out walking -on a moonlit night and find suddenly that you have -climbed to a place whence it is impossible to climb -down or be taken down. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">shouting</span>). What feelings -are you experiencing? I can’t hear. Louder! Ah, -so? Well, well! What a situation! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Crowd</span> (<span class="sd">interested</span>). Listen, listen! Let’s -hear what his feelings are. How terrible! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">writes in his note-book, tossing -out detached remarks</span>). Mortal terror numbs -his limbs.—A cold shiver goes down his spinal -column.—No hope.—Before his mental vision rises -a picture of family bliss: Wife making sandwiches; -his five children innocently lisping their love.—Grandma -in the arm-chair with a tube to her ear, -that is, grandpa in the arm-chair, with a tube to <em>his</em> -ear and grandma.—Deeply moved by the sympathy -of the public.—His last wish before his death that -the words he uttered with his last breath should be -published in our newspapers— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman</span> (<span class="sd">indignantly</span>). My! He -lies like a salesman. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Mary</span> (<span class="sd">wearily</span>). Papa, children, look, he is -starting to fall again. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">angrily</span>). Don’t bother me. Such a -<a id="page-27" class="pagenum" title="27"></a> -tragedy is unfolding itself right before your very -eyes—and you— What are you making such big -eyes for again? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">shouting</span>). Hold on fast. -That’s it! My last question: What message do you -wish to leave for your fellow citizens before you -depart for the better world? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man.</span> That they may all go to the -devil. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent.</span> What? Hm, yes— (<span class="sd">He -writes quickly.</span>) Ardent love—is a stanch opponent -of the law granting equal rights to negroes. -His last words: “Let the black niggers—” -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor</span> (<span class="sd">out of breath, pushing through the -crowd</span>). Where is he? Ah, there! Poor young -man. Has there been no clergyman here yet? No? -Thank you. Am I the first? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">writes</span>). A touching dramatic -moment.—A minister has arrived.—All are -trembling on the verge of suspense. Many are -shedding tears— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor.</span> Excuse me, excuse me! Ladies and -gentlemen, a lost soul wishes to make its peace with -God— (<span class="sd">He shouts.</span>) My son, don’t you wish to -make your peace with God? Confess your sins to -me. I will grant you remission at once! What? -I cannot hear? -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-28" class="pagenum" title="28"></a> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">writes</span>). The air is shaken -with the people’s groans. The minister of the -church exhorts the criminal, that is, the unfortunate -man, in touching language.—The unfortunate -creature with tears in his eyes thanks him in a faint -voice— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man</span> (<span class="sd">faintly</span>). If you won’t go -away I will jump on your head. I weigh three -hundred pounds. (<span class="sd">All jump away frightened behind -each other.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> He is falling! He is falling! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">agitatingly</span>). Mary, Aleck, Jimmie. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman</span> (<span class="sd">energetically</span>). Clear the place, -please! Move on! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Lady.</span> Nellie, go quick and tell your father he -is falling. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Photographer</span> (<span class="sd">in despair</span>). Oh my, I am -out of films (<span class="sd">tosses madly about, looking pitifully -at the unknown man</span>). One minute, I’ll go and get -them. I have some in my overcoat pocket over -there. (<span class="sd">He walks a short distance, keeping his eyes -fixed on the unknown man, and then returns.</span>) I -can’t, I am afraid I’ll miss it. Good heavens! They -are over there in my overcoat. Just one minute, -please. I’ll fetch them right away. What a fix. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor.</span> Hurry, my friend. Pull yourself together -and try to hold out long enough to tell me -<a id="page-29" class="pagenum" title="29"></a> -at least your principal sins. You needn’t mention -the lesser ones. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> What a tragedy? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">writes</span>). The criminal, that -is, the unhappy man, makes a public confession and -does penance. Terrible secrets revealed. He is a -bank robber—blew up safes. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">credulously</span>). The scoundrel. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor</span> (<span class="sd">shouts</span>). In the first place, have you -killed? Secondly, have you stolen? Thirdly, have -you committed adultery? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Mary, Jimmie, Katie, Aleck, Charlie, -close your ears. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">writing</span>). Tremendous excitement -in the crowd.—Shouts of indignation. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor</span> (<span class="sd">hurriedly</span>). Fourthly, have you blasphemed? -Fifthly, have you coveted your neighbor’s -ass, his ox, his slave, his wife? Sixthly— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Photographer</span> (<span class="sd">alarmed</span>). Ladies and gentlemen, -an ass! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Photographer.</span> Where? I can’t see -it! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Photographer</span> (<span class="sd">calmed</span>). I thought I heard -it. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor.</span> I congratulate you, my son! I congratulate -you! You have made your peace with -God. Now you may rest easy—Oh, God, what do -<a id="page-30" class="pagenum" title="30"></a> -I see? The Salvation Army! Policeman, chase -them away! -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">Enter a Salvation Army band, men and women -in uniforms. There are only three instruments, a -drum, a violin and a piercingly shrill trumpet.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Salvation Army Man</span> (<span class="sd">frantically beating his -drum and shouting in a nasal voice</span>). Brethren and -sisters— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor</span> (<span class="sd">shouting even louder in a still more -nasal voice in an effort to drown the other’s</span>). He -has already confessed. Bear witness, ladies and -gentlemen, that he has confessed and made his peace -with heaven. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Salvation Army Woman</span> (<span class="sd">climbing on a rock -and shrieking</span>). I once wandered in the dark just -as this sinner and I lived a bad life and was a drunkard, -but when the light of truth— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">A Voice.</span> Why, she is drunk now. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor.</span> Policeman, didn’t he confess and -make his peace with heaven? -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">The Salvation Army man continues to beat his -drum frantically; the rest begin to drawl a song. -Shouts, laughter, whistling. Singing in the café, -and calls of “Waiter!” in all languages. The bewildered -policemen tear themselves away from the -pastor, who is pulling them somewhere; the photographers -turn and twist about as if the seats -<a id="page-31" class="pagenum" title="31"></a> -were burning under them. An English lady comes -riding in on a donkey, who, stopping suddenly, -sprawls out his legs and refuses to go farther, adding -his noise to the rest. Gradually the noise subsides. -The Salvation Army band solemnly withdraws, and -the pastor, waving his hands, follows them.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First English Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">to the other</span>). How -impolite! This crowd doesn’t know how to behave -itself. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second English Tourist.</span> Come, let’s go -away from here. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First English Tourist.</span> One minute. (<span class="sd">He -shouts.</span>) Listen, won’t you hurry up and fall? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second English Tourist.</span> What are you saying, -Sir William? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First English Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">shouting</span>). Don’t -you see that’s what they are waiting for? As a -gentleman you should grant them this pleasure and -so escape the humiliation of undergoing tortures -before this mob. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second English Tourist.</span> Sir William. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">ecstatically</span>). See? It’s true. Aleck, -Jimmie, it’s true. What a tragedy! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Several Tourists</span> (<span class="sd">going for the Englishman</span>). -How dare you? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">First English Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">shoving them aside</span>). -<a id="page-32" class="pagenum" title="32"></a> -Hurry up and fall! Do you hear? If you haven’t -the backbone I’ll help you out with a pistol shot. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> That red-haired devil has gone clear -out of his mind. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman</span> (<span class="sd">seizing the Englishman’s hand</span>). -You have no right to do it, it’s against the law. I’ll -arrest you. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Some Tourists.</span> A barbarous nation! -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">The unknown man shouts something. Excitement -below.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> Hear, hear, hear! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man</span> (<span class="sd">aloud</span>). Take that jackass -away to the devil. He wants to shoot me. And -tell the boss that I can’t stand it any longer. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> What’s that? What boss? He is -losing his mind, the poor man. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Aleck! Mary! This is a mad scene. -Jimmie, you remember Hamlet? Quick. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man</span> (<span class="sd">angrily</span>). Tell him my -spinal column is broken. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Mary</span> (<span class="sd">wearily</span>). Papa, children, he’s beginning -to kick with his legs. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Kate.</span> Is that what is called convulsions, papa? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">rapturously</span>). I don’t know. I think -it is. What a tragedy? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Aleck</span> (<span class="sd">glumly</span>). You fool! You keep cramming -and cramming and you don’t know that the -<a id="page-33" class="pagenum" title="33"></a> -right name for that is agony. And you wear eye-glasses, -too. I can’t bear it any longer, papa. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Think of it, children. A man is -about to fall down to his death and he is bothering -about his spinal column. -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">There is a noise. A man in a white vest, very -much frightened, enters, almost dragged by angry -tourists. He smiles, bows on all sides, stretches out -his arms, now running forward as he is pushed, now -trying to escape in the crowd, but is seized and -pulled again.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> A bare-faced deception! It is an outrage. -Policeman, policeman, he must be taught a -lesson! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Other Voices.</span> What is it? What deception? -What is it all about? They have caught a thief! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">The Man in the White Vest</span> (<span class="sd">bowing and -smiling</span>). It’s a joke, ladies and gentlemen, a joke, -that’s all. The people were bored, so I wanted to -provide a little amusement for them. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man</span> (<span class="sd">angrily</span>). Boss! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">The Man in the White Vest.</span> Wait a -while, wait a while. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man.</span> Do you expect me to stay -here until the Second Advent? The agreement was -till twelve o’clock. What time is it now? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist</span> (<span class="sd">indignantly</span>). Do you hear, -<a id="page-34" class="pagenum" title="34"></a> -ladies and gentlemen? This scoundrel, this man -here in the white vest hired that other scoundrel up -there and just simply tied him to the rock. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> Is he tied? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> Yes, he is tied and he can’t -fall. We are excited and worrying, but he couldn’t -fall even if he tried. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man.</span> What else do you want? Do -you think I am going to break my neck for your -measly ten dollars? Boss, I can’t stand it any -more. One man wanted to shoot me. The pastor -preached me for two hours. This is not in the -agreement. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Aleck.</span> Father, I told you that Baedecker lies. -You believe everything anybody tells you and drag -us about without eating. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Man in the White Vest.</span> The people were -bored. My only desire was to amuse the people. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> What is the matter? I -don’t understand a thing. Why isn’t he going to -fall? Who, then, is going to fall? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> I don’t understand a thing either. -Of course he’s got to fall! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">James.</span> You never understand anything, -father. Weren’t you told that he’s tied to the rock? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Aleck.</span> You can’t convince him. He loves -every Baedecker more than his own children. -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-35" class="pagenum" title="35"></a> -<span class="speaker">James.</span> A nice father! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Silence! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> What is the matter? He -must fall. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> The idea! What a deception. -You’ll have to explain this. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Man in the White Vest.</span> The people were -bored. Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, but wishing -to accommodate you—give you a few hours of -pleasant excitement—elevate your spirits—inspire -you with altruistic sentiments— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Englishman.</span> Is the café yours? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Man in the White Vest.</span> Yes. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Englishman.</span> And is the hotel below also -yours? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Gentleman.</span> Yes. The people were bored— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Correspondent</span> (<span class="sd">writing</span>). The proprietor of -the café, desiring to increase his profits from the -sale of alcoholic beverages, exploits the best human -sentiments.—The people’s indignation— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man</span> (<span class="sd">angrily</span>). Boss, will you -have me taken off at once or won’t you? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Hotel Keeper.</span> What do you want up there? -Aren’t you satisfied? Didn’t I have you taken off -at night? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man.</span> Well, I should say so. You -think I’d be hanging here nights, too! -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-36" class="pagenum" title="36"></a> -<span class="speaker">Hotel Owner.</span> Then you can stand it a few -minutes longer. The people are bored— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> Say, have you any idea of -what you have done? Do you realize the enormity -of it? You are scoundrels, who for your own -sordid personal ends have impiously exploited the -finest human sentiment, love of one’s neighbor. -You have caused us to undergo fear and suffering. -You have poisoned our hearts with pity. And now, -what is the upshot of it all? The upshot is that this -scamp, your vile accomplice, is bound to the rock -and not only will he not fall as everybody expects, -but he <em>can’t</em>. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> What is the matter? He -has got to fall. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Policeman! Policeman! -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">The pastor enters, out of breath.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor.</span> What? Is he still living? Oh, there -he is! What fakirs those Salvationists are. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> Don’t you know that he is bound? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor.</span> Bound! Bound to what? To life? -Well, we are all bound to life until death snaps the -cord. But whether he is bound or not bound, I reconciled -him with heaven, and that’s enough. But -those fakirs— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Policeman! Policeman, you must -<a id="page-37" class="pagenum" title="37"></a> -draw up an official report. There is no way out -of it. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman</span> (<span class="sd">going for the hotel owner</span>). -I will not allow myself to be fooled. I saw an -aeronaut drop from the clouds and go crash upon -a roof. I saw a tiger tear a woman to pieces— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Photographer.</span> I spoiled three films photographing -that scamp. You will have to answer for -this, sir. I will hold you responsible. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> An official report! An official report! -Such a bare-faced deception. Mary, Jimmie, -Aleck, Charlie, call a policeman. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Hotel Keeper</span> (<span class="sd">drawing back, in despair</span>). -But, I can’t make him fall if he doesn’t want to. I -did everything in my power, ladies and gentlemen! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> I will not allow it. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Hotel Keeper.</span> Excuse me. I promise you -on my word of honor that the next time he will -fall. But he doesn’t want to, to-day. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man.</span> What’s that? What did you -say about the next time? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Hotel Keeper.</span> You shut up there! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man.</span> For ten dollars? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor.</span> Pray, what impudence! I just made -his peace with heaven when he was in danger of -his life. You have heard him threatening to fall on -my head, haven’t you? And still he is dissatisfied. -<a id="page-38" class="pagenum" title="38"></a> -Adulterer, thief, murderer, coveter of your neighbor’s -ass— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Photographer.</span> Ladies and gentlemen, an ass! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Photographer.</span> Where, where is an -ass? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Photographer</span> (<span class="sd">calmed</span>). I thought I heard -one. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Second Photographer.</span> It is you who are an -ass. I have become cross-eyed on account of your -shouting: “An ass! An ass!” -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Mary</span> (<span class="sd">wearily</span>). Papa, children, look! A -policeman is coming. -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">Excitement and noise. On one side a crowd -pulling a policeman, on the other the hotel keeper; -both keep crying: “Excuse me! Excuse me!”</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Policeman, there he is, the fakir, the -swindler. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Pastor.</span> Policeman, there he is, the adulterer, -the murderer, the coveter of his neighbor’s ass— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman.</span> Excuse me, excuse me, ladies and -gentlemen. We will bring him to his senses in -short order and make him confess. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Hotel Keeper.</span> I can’t make him fall if he -doesn’t want to. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman.</span> Hey, you, young man out there! -Can you fall or can’t you? Confess! -</p> - -<p> -<a id="page-39" class="pagenum" title="39"></a> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man</span> (<span class="sd">sullenly</span>). I don’t want to -fall! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Voices.</span> Aha, he has confessed. What a -scoundrel! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> Write down what I dictate, -policeman— “Desiring—for the sake of gain to -exploit the sentiment of love of one’s neighbor—the -sacred feeling—a-a-a—” -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Listen children, they are drawing up -an official report. What exquisite choice of language! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tall Tourist.</span> The sacred feeling which— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Policeman</span> (<span class="sd">writing with painful effort, his -tongue stuck out</span>). Love of one’s neighbor—the -sacred feeling which— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Mary</span> (<span class="sd">wearily</span>). Papa, children, look! An -advertisement is coming. -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">Enter musicians with trumpets and drums, a -man at their head carrying on a long pole a huge -placard with the picture of an absolutely bald head, -and printed underneath: “I was bald.”</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Unknown Man.</span> Too late. They are drawing -up a report here. You had better skidoo! -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">The Man Carrying the Pole</span> (<span class="sd">stopping and -speaking in a loud voice</span>). I had been bald from -the day of my birth and for a long time thereafter. -That miserable growth, which in my tenth -<a id="page-40" class="pagenum" title="40"></a> -year covered my scalp was more like wool than real -hair. When I was married my skull was as bare -as a pillow and my young bride— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> What a tragedy! Newly married -and with such a head! Can you realize how dreadful -that is, children? -</p> - -<p> -(<span class="sd">All listen with interest, even the policeman -stopping in his arduous task and inclining his ear -with his pen in his hand.</span>) -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">The Man Carrying the Pole</span> (<span class="sd">solemnly</span>). -And the time came when my matrimonial happiness -literally hung by a hair. All the medicines recommended -by quacks to make my hair grow— -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Tourist.</span> Your note-book, Jimmie. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Military Woman.</span> But when is he going to -fall? -</p> - -<p> -<span class="speaker">Hotel Keeper</span> (<span class="sd">amiably</span>). The next time, -lady, the next time. I won’t tie him so hard—you -understand? -</p> - -<p class="end"> -(<span class="sd">Curtain.</span>) -</p> - -<div class="ads chapter"> -<p class="adh"> -POETRY -</p> - -<p class="ads"> -A MAGAZINE OF VERSE -</p> - -<p class="c"> -Edited by Harriet Monroe, 543 Cass St., Chicago, Ill. -</p> - -<p class="hang"> -POETRY, at the end of its first year, is no longer an experiment -but an assured artistic success, a publication whose -importance is authoritatively recognized, not only in this -country, but in Great Britain and France as well. The -field it has opened up is full of brilliant possibilities, encouraging -the editors to hope for the enthusiastic support -of a discriminating public. -</p> - -<p class="hang"> -POETRY endeavors to present the best verse now being -written in English, quality alone being the test of acceptance. -</p> - -<p class="hang"> -POETRY is an effort to create an organ for the art. While -the ordinary magazines must minister to a large public -little interested in poetry, this magazine appeals to and -will develop a public primarily interested in poetry as -an art, potentially the highest, most complete human expression -of truth and beauty. Thus it offers to poets a -chance to be heard by their own audience, in their own -place, without the limitations imposed by the popular -magazines. And to lovers of poetry it offers each month -a sheaf of new verse in delicate form uninterrupted by -prose articles demanding a different mood. -</p> - -<p class="hang"> -If You Love Good Poetry, Subscribe— -</p> - -<p class="u hang"> -POETRY<br /> -543 Cass Street, Chicago. -</p> - - <div class="form"> -<p> -Send POETRY for one year ($1.50 enclosed) beginning -</p> - -<p> -................................ to -</p> - -<p> -Name .............................. -</p> - -<p> -Address ........................... -</p> - - </div> -</div> - -<div class="ads chapter"> -<p class="adh"> -THE INTERCOLLEGIATE SOCIALIST -</p> - -<p class="i ads"> -Thought-Compelling, Admirably Written Quarterly -of Socialism and the Socialist Movement -</p> - -<p class="c"> -Among the year’s contributors are: -</p> - -<p class="noindent"> -Karl Kautsky, Jean Longuet, Keir Hardie, Morris Hillquit, -Alexander Irvine, Helen L. Sumner, Sidney and Beatrice -Webb, Prof. Vida D. 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