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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Life in the Grey Nunnery at Montreal
+by Sarah J Richardson
+
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+Title: Life in the Grey Nunnery at Montreal
+
+Author: Sarah J Richardson
+
+Release Date: May, 2004 [EBook #5734]
+[Yes, we are more than one year ahead of schedule]
+[This file was first posted on August 18, 2002]
+
+Edition: 10
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LIFE IN THE GREY NUNNERY ***
+
+
+
+
+This etext was produced by Gardner Buchanan with help from
+Charles Franks and Distributed Proofers.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+A brief note about the Project Gutenberg edition of Life
+in the Grey Nunnery at Montreal.
+
+Life in the Grey Nunnery was first published in Boston,
+in 1857 by Edward P. Hood, who was credited as the book's
+editor. It is likely that this account is by Sarah J.
+Richardson "as told to" Edward Hood, though it may in
+fact be completely fictional. It is clearly an
+anti-Catholic book, an example of the genre of fiction
+referred to as "the convent horror story." Anti-Catholic
+sentiments were common in the United States during the
+middle part of the 1800s probably directed at the relatively
+large number of Catholic immigrants arriving from Germany,
+and particularly Ireland during this period. These
+sentiments resulted in riots and the burning of churches,
+including the destruction by a mob of the Ursuline convent
+and girl's school in Charlestown Massachusetts. During
+this period a powerful nationalist political party the
+"Know Nothings" also emerged, and won a number of
+influential positions in the 1850s, particularly in New
+England.  They succeeded in creating legislation hostile
+to the Catholic church, barring Catholics from various
+positions and requiring Catholic institutions to submit
+to hostile "inspections." The interested reader is
+encouraged to use a literature search for the terms MARIA
+MONK or KNOW NOTHINGS to learn more about this genre of
+literature and the social circumstances in which it was
+created.
+
+
+
+
+LIFE IN THE GREY NUNNERY AT MONTREAL
+
+An authentic narrative of the horrors, mysteries,
+and cruelties of convent life by Sarah J. Richardson,
+an escaped nun.
+
+Edited by Edward P. Hood
+
+
+
+
+TABLE OF CONTENTS
+
+CHAPTER I     PARENTAGE--FATHER'S MARRIAGE
+CHAPTER II    THE WHITE NUNNERY
+CHAPTER III   THE NURSERY
+CHAPTER IV    A SLAVE FOR LIFE
+CHAPTER V     CEREMONY OF CONFIRMATION
+CHAPTER VI    THE GREY NUNNERY
+CHAPTER VII   ORPHAN'S HOME
+CHAPTER VIII  CONFESSION AND SORROW OF NO AVAIL
+CHAPTER IX    ALONE WITH THE DEAD
+CHAPTER X     THE SICK NUN
+CHAPTER XI    THE JOY OF FREEDOM
+CHAPTER XII   STRANGER IN A STRANGE LAND
+CHAPTER XIII  LANDLADY'S STORY CONTINUED
+CHAPTER XIV   THE TWO SISTERS
+CHAPTER XV    CHOICE OF PUNISHMENTS
+CHAPTER XVI   HORRORS OF STARVATION
+CHAPTER XVII  THE TORTURE ROOM
+CHAPTER XVIII RETURN TO THE NUNNERY
+CHAPTER XIX   SICKNESS AND DEATH OF A SUPERIOR
+CHAPTER XX    STUDENTS AT THE ACADEMY
+CHAPTER XXI   SECOND ESCAPE FROM THE NUNNERY
+CHAPTER XXII  LONELY MIDNIGHT WALK
+CHAPTER XXIII FLIGHT AND RECAPTURE
+CHAPTER XXIV  RESOLVES TO ESCAPE
+CHAPTER XXV   EVENTFUL JOURNEY
+CHAPTER XXVI  CONCLUSION
+
+APPENDIX I    ABSURDITIES OF ROMANISTS
+APPENDIX II   CRUELTY OF ROMANISTS
+APPENDIX III  INQUISITION OF GOA--IMPRISONMENT OF
+              M. DELLON, 1673
+APPENDIX IV   INQUISITION OF GOA, CONCLUDED
+APPENDIX V    INQUISITION AT MACERATA, ITALY
+APPENDIX VI   ROMANISM OF THE PRESENT DAY
+APPENDIX VII  NARRATIVE OP SIGNORINA FLORIENCIA
+              D' ROMANI
+
+
+
+
+LIFE IN THE GREY NUNNERY.
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+PARENTAGE.--FATHER'S MARRIAGE.
+
+I was born at St. John's, New Brunswick, in the year
+1835. My father was from the city of Dublin, Ireland,
+where he spent his youth, and received an education in
+accordance with the strictest rules of Roman Catholic
+faith and practice. Early manhood, however, found him
+dissatisfied with his native country, longing for other
+scenes and distant climes. He therefore left Ireland,
+and came to Quebec.
+
+Here he soon became acquainted with Capt. Willard, a
+wealthy English gentleman, who, finding him a stranger
+in a strange land, kindly opened his door, and gave him
+employment and a home. Little did he think that in so
+doing he was warming in his bosom a viper whose poisonous
+fangs would, ere long, fasten on his very heart-strings,
+and bring down his grey hairs with sorrow to the grave.
+His only child was a lovely daughter of fourteen. From
+what I have heard of her, I think she must have been very
+beautiful in person, quiet, gentle and unassuming in her
+deportment, and her disposition amiable and affectionate.
+She was exceedingly romantic, and her mental powers were
+almost, if not entirely uncultivated; still, she possessed
+sufficient strength of character to enable her to form
+a deep, ardent, and permanent attachment.
+
+The young stranger gazed upon her with admiring eyes,
+and soon began to whisper in her ear the flattering tale
+of love. This, of course, her parents could not approve.
+What! give their darling to a stranger? Never, no, never.
+What could they do without her? Grieved that their kindness
+should have been thus returned, they bade him go his way,
+and leave their child in peace. He did go, but like a
+thief he returned. In the darkness of midnight he stole
+to her chamber, and bore away from the home of her
+childhood, "a father's joy, a mother's pride."
+
+Who can tell the anguish of their souls when they entered
+that deserted chamber? How desolate their lonely
+hearthstone! How dark the home where her presence had
+scattered rainbow hues! A terrible blow it was to Capt.
+Willard; a very bitter thing thus to have his cherished
+plans frustrated, his brightest hopes destroyed; to see
+the very sun of his existence go down at midday in clouds
+and darkness. Yes, to the stern father this sad event
+brought bitter, bitter grief. But to the mother--that
+tender, affectionate mother, it was death. Yea, more than
+death, for reason, at the first shock, reeled and tottered
+on its throne; then, as days and weeks passed by, and
+still the loved one did not return, when every effort to
+find her had been made in vain, then, the dread certainty
+settled down upon her soul that her child was lost to
+her forever. Hope, gave place to despair, and she became,
+from that time, a raving maniac. At length death came
+to her relief, and her husband was left alone.
+
+Six weary years passed over the lonely man, and then he
+rejoiced in the intelligence that his child was still
+living with her husband at St. John's. He immediately
+wrote to her imploring her to return to her old home,
+and with the light of her presence dispel the gloom of
+his dwelling. Accordingly she left St. John's, and in
+company with her husband returned to her father. I was
+then about a year and a half old, but I have so often
+heard these facts related by my father and grandfather,
+they are indelibly impressed on my mind, and will never
+be erased from my memory.
+
+My mother now thought her trouble at an end, that in
+future she should enjoy the happiness she once anticipated.
+But, alas for all human prospects! Ere one short month
+had passed, difficulties arose in consequence of the
+difference in their religious opinions. Capt. Willard
+was a firm Protestant, while my father was quite as firm
+in his belief of the principles of the Roman Catholics.
+"Can two walk together except they be agreed?" They parted
+in anger, and my father again became a wanderer, leaving
+his wife and child with his father-in-law. But my mother
+was a faithful, devoted wife. Her husband was her heart's
+chosen idol whom she loved too well to think of being
+separated from. She therefore left her father's house,
+with all its luxuries and enjoyments, to follow the
+fortunes of one, who was certainly unworthy of the pure
+affection thus lavished upon him. As her health had been
+delicate for the last two years, she concluded to leave
+me with her father for a short time, intending to send
+for me, as soon as she was in a situation to take care
+of me. But this was not to be. Death called her away,
+and I saw my mother no more till her corpse was brought
+back, and buried in her father's garden.
+
+Two years I remained with my grandfather, and from him,
+I received the most affectionate and devoted attention.
+My father at length opened a saloon, for the sale of
+porter, and hired a black woman to do his work. He then
+came for me. My grandfather entreated that I might be
+allowed to remain. Well he knew that my father was not
+the man to be entrusted with the care of a child--that
+a Porter House was no place for me, for he was quite sure
+that stronger liquors than porter were there drank and
+sold. In fact, it was said, that my father was himself
+a living evidence of this. But it is of a parent I am
+speaking, and, whatever failings the world may have seen
+in him, to me he was a kind and tender father. The years
+I spent with him were the happiest of my life. On memory's
+page they stand out in bold relief, strikingly contrasting
+with the wretchedness of my after life. And though I
+cannot forget that his own rash act brought this
+wretchedness upon me, still, I believe his motives were
+good. I know that he loved me, and every remembrance of
+his kindness, and those few bright days of childhood, I
+have carefully cherished as a sacred thing. He did not,
+however, succeed in the business he had undertaken, but
+lost his property and was at length compelled to give up
+his saloon.
+
+I was then placed in a Roman Catholic family, where he
+often visited, and ever appeared to feel for me the most
+devoted attachment. One day he came to see me in a state
+of partial intoxication. I did not then know why his
+face was so red, and his breath so offensive, but I now
+know that he was under the influence of ardent spirits.
+The woman with whom I boarded seeing his condition, and
+being a good Catholic, resolved to make the most of the
+occasion for the benefit of the nunnery. She therefore
+said to him, "You are not capable of bringing up that
+child; why don't you give her to Priest Dow?"--"Will he
+take her?" asked my father. "Yes," she replied, "he will
+put her into the nunnery, and the nuns will take better
+care of her than you can." "On what condition will they
+take her?" he asked. "Give the priest one hundred dollars,"
+replied the artful woman, "and he will take good care of
+her as long as she lives."
+
+This seemed a very plausible story; but I am sure my
+father did not realize what he was doing. Had he waited
+for a little reflection, he would never have consented
+to such an arrangement, and my fate would have been quite
+different. But as it was, he immediately sent for the
+priest, and gave me to him, to be provided for, as his
+own child, until I was of age. I was then to be allowed
+to go out into the world if I chose. To this, Priest Dow
+consented, in consideration of one hundred dollars, which
+he received, together with a good bed and bedding. My
+mother's gold ear-rings were also entrusted to his care,
+until I should be old enough to wear them. But I never
+saw them again. Though I was at that time but six years
+old, I remember perfectly, all that passed upon that
+memorable occasion. I did not then comprehend the full
+meaning of what was said, but I understood enough to fill
+my heart with sorrow and apprehension.
+
+When their bargain was completed, Priest Dow called me
+to him, saying, with a smile, "You are a stubborn little
+girl, I guess, a little naughty, sometimes, are you not?"
+Surprised and alarmed, I replied, "No, sir." He then took
+hold of my hair, which was rather short, drew it back
+from my forehead with a force that brought the tears to
+my eyes, and pressing his hand heavily on my head, he
+again asked if I was not sometimes a little wilful and
+disobedient. I was so much frightened at this, I turned
+to my father, and with tears and sobs entreated him not
+to send me away with that man, but allow me to stay at
+home with him. He drew me to his bosom, wiped away my
+tears, and sought to quiet my fears by assuring me that
+I would have a good and pleasant home; that the nuns
+would take better care of me than he could; and that he
+would often come to see me. Thus, by the aid of flattery
+on one side, and sugarplums on the other, they persuaded
+me at last to accompany the priest to the White Nunnery,
+St. Paul's street, Quebec.
+
+I was too young to realize the sad change in my situation,
+or to anticipate the trials and privations that awaited
+me. But I was deeply grieved thus to leave my father, my
+only real friend, my mother being dead, and my grandfather
+a heretic, whom I had been taught to regard with the
+utmost abhorrence. Little, however, did I think that this
+was a last farewell. But such it was. Though he had
+promised to come often to see me, I never saw my father
+again; never even heard from him; and now, I do not know
+whether he is dead or alive.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+THE WHITE NUNNERY.
+
+On my arrival at the nunnery, I was placed under the care
+of a lady whom they called a Superior. She took me into
+a room alone, and told me that the priest would come to
+me in the morning to hear confession, and I must confess
+to him all my sins. "What are sins?" I asked, and, "How
+shall I confess? I don't know what it means." "Don't know
+what sins are!" she exclaimed in great astonishment "Why,
+child, I am surprised that you should be so ignorant!
+Where have you lived all your days?" With all the simplicity
+of childhood, I replied, "With my father; and once I
+lived with my grandfather; but they didn't tell me how
+to confess." "Well," said she, "you must tell the priest
+all your wicked thoughts, words, and actions." "What is
+wicked?" I innocently asked. "If you have ever told an
+untruth;" she replied, "or taken what did not belong to
+you, or been in any way naughty, disobedient, or unkind;
+if you have been angry, or quarrelled with your playmates,
+that was wicked, and you must tell the priest all about
+it If you try to conceal, or keep back anything, the
+priest will know it and punish you. You cannot deceive
+him if you try, for he knows all you do, or say, or even
+think; and if you attempt it, you'll only get yourself
+into trouble. But if you are resolved to be a good girl,
+kind, gentle, frank, sincere, and obedient, the priest
+will love you, and be kind to you."
+
+When I was conducted to my room, at bedtime, I rejoiced
+to find in it several little cot beds, occupied by little
+girls about my own age, who had been, like myself,
+consigned to the tender mercies of priests and nuns. I
+thought if we must live in that great gloomy house, which
+even to my childish imagination seemed so much like a
+prison, we could in some degree dispel our loneliness
+and mitigate our sorrows, by companionship and sympathy.
+But I was soon made to know that even this small comfort
+would not be allowed us, for the Superior, as she assisted
+me to bed, told me that I must not speak, or groan, or
+turn upon my side, or move in any way; for if I made the
+least noise or disturbance, I would be severely punished.
+She assured me that if we disobeyed in the least particular,
+she would know it, even if she was not present, and deal
+with us accordingly. She said that when the clock struck
+twelve, the bell would ring for prayers; that we must
+then rise, and kneel with our heads bowed upon the bed,
+and repeat the prayer she taught us. When, at length,
+she left us, locking the door after her, I was so
+frightened, I did not dare to sleep, lest I should move,
+or fail to awake at the proper time.
+
+Slowly passed the hours of that long and weary night,
+while I lay, waiting the ringing of the bell, or thinking
+upon the past with deep regret. The most fearful visions
+haunted my brain, and fears of future punishment filled
+my mind. How could I hope to escape it, when they were
+so very strict, and able to read my most secret thoughts?
+What would I not have given could I have been again
+restored to my father? True he was intemperate, but at
+that time I thought not of this; I only knew that he was
+always kind to me, that he never refused what I asked of
+him. I sometimes think, even now, that if he had not so
+cruelly thrust me from him, I might have been able to
+win him from his cups and evil course of life. But this
+was not to be. Having given himself up to the demon of
+intemperance, it is not surprising that he should have
+given away his only child; that he should have placed
+her in the hands of those who proved utterly unworthy of
+the trust. But however indignant I may at times have felt
+towards him, for the one great wrong he committed against
+me, still I do not believe he would ever have done it
+but for the influence of ardent spirits. Moreover, I do
+not suppose that he had the least idea what kind of a
+place it was. He wished, doubtless, that his child might
+be well educated; that she might be shielded from the
+many trials and temptations that cluster around the
+footsteps of the young and inexperienced, in the midst
+of a cold and heartless world. From these evils the
+nunnery, he thought, would be a secure retreat, for there
+science, religion, and philanthropy, PROFESSEDLY, go hand
+in hand. Like many other deluded parents, he thought that
+"Holiness to the Lord" was inscribed upon those walls,
+and that nothing which could pervert or defile the youthful
+mind, was permitted to enter there. With these views and
+feelings, he was undoubtedly sincere when he told me, "I
+would have a good home, and the nuns would take better
+care of me than he could." Rash his decision certainly
+was, cruel it proved to be; but I shall ever give him
+credit for good intentions.
+
+At length the bell rang, and all the girls immediately
+left their beds, and placed themselves upon their knees.
+I followed their example, but I had scarcely time to
+kneel by my bed, when the Superior came into the room
+with a light in her hand, and attended by a priest. He
+came to me, opened a book, and told me to cross myself.
+This ceremony he instructed me to perform in the following
+manner: the right hand is placed upon the forehead, and
+drawn down to the breast; then across the breast from
+left to right. The Superior then told me to say the prayer
+called "Hail Mary!" I attempted to do so, but failed,
+for, though I had often repeated it after my father, I
+could not say it correctly alone. She then bade me join
+my hands, and repeat it after her. "Hail Mary! Full of
+grace! The Lord be with thee! Blessed art thou among
+women! Blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus! Mother
+of God! Pray for us sinners, now, and at the hour of our
+death, Amen."
+
+"Now," said the Superior, as I rose from my knees, "you
+must learn every word of that prayer before to-morrow
+night, or go without your supper." I tried my best to
+remember it, but with so little instruction, for she
+repeated it to me but once, I found it quite impossible
+the next night to say it correctly. Of course, I was
+compelled to go without my supper. This may seem a light
+punishment to those who have enough to eat--who sit down
+to a full table, and satisfy their appetite three times
+per day, but to a nun, who is allowed only enough to
+sustain life, it is quite a different thing. And especially
+to a child, this mode of punishment is more severe, and
+harder to bear than almost any other. I thought I would
+take good care not to be punished in that way again; but
+I little knew what was before me.
+
+Before the Superior left us she assisted me into bed,
+and bade me be very still until the second bell in the
+morning. Then, I must rise and dress as quickly as
+possible, and go to her room. Quietness, she enjoined
+upon me as a virtue, while the least noise, or disturbance
+of any kind, would be punished as a crime. She said I
+must walk very softly indeed along the halls, and close
+the doors so carefully that not a sound could be heard.
+After giving me these first instructions in convent life,
+she left me, and I was allowed to sleep the rest of the
+night.
+
+The next morning, I awoke at the ringing of the first
+bell, but I did not dare to stir until the second bell,
+when the other little girls arose in great haste. I then
+dressed as quickly as possible, but not a word was spoken
+--not a thought, and scarcely a look exchanged. I was
+truly "alone amid a crowd," and I felt the utter loneliness
+of my situation most keenly. Yet I saw very clearly that
+there was but one course for me to pursue, and that was,
+to obey in all things; to have no will of my own, and
+thus, if possible, escape punishment. But it was hard,
+very hard for me to bring my mind to this. I had been
+the idolized child of affection too long to submit readily
+and patiently to the privations I was now forced to
+endure. Hitherto my will had been law. I had naturally
+an imperious, violent temper, which I had never been
+taught to govern. Instead of this, my appetites were
+pampered, my passions indulged, and every desire gratified
+as far as possible. Until that last sad parting, I hardly
+knew what it was to have a request refused; and now, to
+experience such a change--such a sudden transition from
+the most liberal indulgence to the most cruel and rigorous
+self-denial--Oh, it was a severe trial to my independent
+spirit to submit to it. Yet, submit I must, for I had
+learned, even then, that my newly appointed guardians
+were not to be trifled with. Henceforth, OBEDIENCE must
+be my motto. To every command, however cruel and unjust,
+I must yield a blind, passive, and unquestioning obedience.
+
+I dressed as quickly as possible, and hastened down to
+the Superior. As I passed through the hall, I thought I
+would be very careful to step softly, but in my haste I
+forgot what she said about closing the door, and it came
+together with a loud crash. On entering the room, I found
+the Superior waiting for me; in her hand she held a stick
+about a foot long, to the end of which was attached nine
+leather strings, some twelve or fifteen inches long, and
+about the size of a man's little finger. She bade me come
+to her, in a voice so cold and stern it sent a thrill of
+terror through my frame, and I trembled with the
+apprehension of some impending evil. I had no idea that
+she was about to punish me, for I was not aware that I
+had done anything to deserve it; but her looks frightened
+me, and I feared,--I know not what. She took hold of my
+arm, and without saying a word, gave me ten or twelve
+strokes over the head and shoulders with this miniature
+cat-o'-nine-tails. Truly, with her, it was "a word and
+a blow, and the blow came first." Wherever the strings
+chanced to fall upon the bare flesh, they raised the
+skin, as though a hot iron had been applied to it. In
+some places they took off the skin entirely, and left
+the flesh raw, and quivering with the stinging pain. I
+could not think at first what I had done to deserve this
+severe punishment, nor did she condescend to enlighten
+me. But when I began to cry, and beg to go to my father,
+she sternly bade me stop crying at once, for I could not
+go to my father. I must stay there, she said, and learn
+to remember all her commands and obey then. She then
+taught me the following verse:
+
+   I am a little nun,
+   The sisters I will mind;
+   When I am pretty and learn,
+   Then they will use me kind.
+   I must not be so noisy
+   When I go about the house,
+   I'll close the doors so softly
+   They'll think I am a mouse.
+
+This verse I repeated until I could say it correctly.
+I was then taken to the breakfast-room, where I was
+directed to kneel before the crucifix, and say my prayers,
+which I repeated after the Superior. I was then seated
+at the table, and directed to hold my head down, and fix
+my eyes upon my plate. I must not look at any one, or
+gaze about the room; but sit still, and quietly eat what
+was given me. I had upon my plate, one thin slice of
+wheat bread, a bit of potato, and a very small cup of
+milk. This was my stated allowance, and I could have no
+more, however hungry I might be. The same quantity was
+given me every meal, when in usual health, until I was
+ten years of age. On fast days, no food whatever was
+allowed; and we always fasted for three meals before
+receiving the sacrament. This ceremony was observed every
+third day, therefore we were obliged to fast about
+one-third of the time. Yet, however long the fast might
+be, my allowance of food was never increased.
+
+After breakfast the Superior took me to Priest Dow for
+confession. He kept me with him all day, allowing me
+neither food nor drink; nor did he permit me to break my
+fast until four o'clock the next day. I then received
+what they call the sacrament, for the first time.
+
+To prepare for this, I was clad in a white dress and
+cape, and a white cap on my head. I was then led to the
+chapel, and passing up the aisle, knelt before the altar.
+Priest Dow then came and stood before me, and taking from
+a wine-glass a small thin wafer, he placed it upon my
+tongue, at the same time repeating some Latin words,
+which, the Superior afterwards told me, mean in English,
+"The body and blood of Christ." I was taught to believe
+that I held in my mouth the real body and blood of Christ.
+I was also told that if I swallowed the wafer before it
+had melted on my tongue, IT WOULD CHOKE ME TO DEATH; and
+if I indulged an evil thought while I held it in my mouth
+I SHOULD FALL INTO A POOL OF BLOOD.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+THE NURSERY.
+
+While in the White Nunnery, I spent the most of my time
+in the nursery. But the name gives one no idea of the
+place. The freedom and careless gayety, so characteristic
+of other nurseries, had no place in this. No cheerful
+conversation, no juvenile merriment, or pleasureable
+excitement of any kind, were ever allowed. A merry laugh,
+on the contrary, a witty jest, or a sly practical joke,
+would have been punished as the most heinous offence.
+Here as elsewhere in the establishment, the strictest
+rules of silence and obedience were rigidly enforced.
+There were twenty little girls in the room with me, but
+we were never permitted to speak to each other, nor to
+any one except a priest or a Superior. When directly
+addressed by either of them we were allowed to answer;
+but we might never ask a question, or make a remark, or
+in any way, either by looks, words, or signs, hold
+communication with each other. Whenever we did so, it
+was at the risk of being discovered and severely punished.
+Yet this did not repress the desire for conversation; it
+only made us more cautious, artful, and deceptive. The
+only recreation allowed us was fifteen minutes' exercise
+in the yard every morning and evening. We might then
+amuse ourselves as we chose, but were required to spend
+the whole time in some kind of active exercise; if one
+of our number ventured to sit still, we were all punished
+the next day by being kept in the house.
+
+It was my business, while in the nursery, to dust all
+the furniture and the floor, with a flannel mop, made
+and kept for this purpose. The floors were all painted
+and varnished, and very easily kept clean.
+
+Two hours and a half each day we spent with a priest,
+whom we were taught to call Father Darity (I do not know
+as I spell this and other names correctly, but I give it
+to the reader as it sounded to my ear). He appeared to
+take great pleasure in learning us to repeat the prayers
+and catechism required by Priest Dow. He also gave us a
+variety of instructions in other things, enjoining in
+particular the most absolute obedience and perfect silence.
+He assured us that if we dared to disobey him in the
+least particular, he should know it, even if he was not
+present with us at the time. He said he knew all our
+thoughts, words, and actions; and if we did not obey, he
+should "EAT US WITH A GRAIN OF SALT."
+
+I presume my reader will smile at this, and exclaim, "How
+absurd!" Yes, to you it is absurd; but to the mind of a
+child who placed the utmost confidence in his veracity,
+it was an evidence that he was invested with supernatural
+powers. For myself I believed every word he said, and
+nothing would have tempted me to disobey him. Perfect
+obedience he considered the highest attainment, and, to
+secure this, the greatest of all virtues, no means were
+thought too severe. We were frightened and punished in
+every possible way.
+
+But, though Father Darity acted on the one great principle
+with the Romanists, that the "end sanctifies the means,"
+he was in general a much kinder man than Priest Dow. He
+urged us on with our catechism as fast as possible,
+telling us, as a motive to greater diligence, that the
+bishop was soon to visit us, and that we could not be
+admitted to his presence until we had our prayers and
+catechism perfectly.
+
+One day, when we were in the yard at play, I told one of
+the little girls that I did not like to live there; that
+I did not like one of the people in the house; that I
+wished to return to my father, and I should tell him so
+the first time he came to see me.
+
+"Then you like to live with your father?" said she. I
+told her I did, for then I could do as I pleased, without
+the fear of punishment. She said that she did not like
+to live there any better than I did. I asked her why she
+did not go away, if she disliked to stay. She replied,
+"I should like to go away well enough, if I had any
+friends to go to; but my father and mother are both dead,
+and I have no home but this; so you see I must stay here
+if they wish me to; but there is one consolation; if we
+are good girls, and try to do right, they will be kind
+to us." I made no further remark; but the moment we
+returned to the house she told the Superior what I said,
+taking good care not to repeat her own expressions, and
+leaving the Superior to infer that she had made no reply.
+
+I saw at once by the stern look that came over the lady's
+face that she was very angry; and I would gladly have
+recalled those few hasty words had it been in my power
+to have done so. She immediately left the room, but soon
+returned with Priest Dow. His countenance also indicated
+anger, as he took hold of my arm and led me to a darkened
+room, in which several candles were burning.
+
+Here I saw three scenes, which I think must have been
+composed of images, pictures, and curtains. I do not
+pretend to describe them correctly, I can only tell how
+they appeared to me.
+
+The first was an image of Christ on the cross, with his
+arms extended as we usually see them in pictures. On his
+right hand was a representation of heaven, and on the
+left, of hell. Heaven was made to appear like a bright,
+beautiful, and glorious place. A wall of pink color
+surrounded it, and in the center was a spring of clear
+water. In the midst of this spring stood a tree, bearing
+on every limb a lighted candle, and on the top, the image
+of Christ and a dove.
+
+Hell was surrounded by a black wall, within which, there
+was also a spring; but the water was very black, and
+beside it stood a large black image, with horns on its
+head, a long tail, and a large cloven foot. The place
+where it stood was in deep shadow, made to resemble, as
+neatly as possible, clouds and darkness. The priest led
+me up to this fearful object, and placed me on one side
+of it, while he stood on the other; but it would turn
+away from him towards me, roll up its great eyes, open
+its mouth and show its long white tusks. The priest said
+it turned from him, because he was a good man, and I was
+very wicked. He said that it was the devil, come up from
+the bottomless pit to devour me; and if I said such wicked
+words again, it would carry me off. I was very much
+frightened, for I then thought that all he said was true;
+that those images, which I now know were strung on wires
+were really what they were made to represent.
+
+In fact, until I was fifteen years old, I really believed
+that the image I then saw was an evil spirit. But since
+that time, I have been made to know that the priests
+themselves are the only evil spirits about the place.
+
+Priest Dow then led me back to the nursery, and left me
+with the Superior. But he soon came, back, saying he
+"knew what I was thinking about; that I had wicked thoughts
+about him; thought he was a bad man, and that I wished
+to leave him and go to my father;" Now this was all true,
+and the fact that he knew it, frightened me accordingly.
+It was a sure proof that what Father Darity said was
+true. But how could I ever be safe, if they could thus
+read the inmost secrets of my soul? I did dislike them
+all very much indeed and I could not help it. How then
+could I avert the consequences of this deep aversion to
+convent life, since it could not be concealed? Was it
+possible for me so far to conquer myself, as to love the
+persons with whom I lived? How many nights did I lie
+awake pondering this question, and resolving to make the
+effort. I was, of course, too young to know that it was
+only by shrewd guessing, and a general knowledge of human
+nature, that he was enabled to tell my thoughts so
+correctly.
+
+"Now," said he, "for indulging these dreadful thoughts,
+I shall take you back to the devil, and give you up to
+him." I was frightened before; but I have no words to
+describe my feelings when he again led me back, and left
+me beside the image, saying, as he closed the door, "If
+the devil groans three times, and the Lord does not speak,
+you must stay here until to-morrow at this time." I
+trembled so that I could hardly stand, and when, after
+a few moments, a sound like a groan fell upon my ears,
+I shrieked in the extremity of terror.
+
+[Footnote: Cioui, formerly a Benedictine Monk, giving an
+account of his imprisonment at Rome, after his conversion
+says:--
+
+"One evening, after listening to a discourse filled with
+dark images of death, I returned to my room, and found
+the light set upon the ground. I took it up and approached
+the table to place it there, but what was my horror and
+consternation at beholding spread out upon it, a whitened
+skeleton! Before the reader can comprehend my dismay, it
+is necessary he should reflect for a moment on the
+peculiarities of childhood, especially in a Romish country,
+where children are seldom spoken to except in superstitious
+language, whether by their parents or teachers: and
+domestics adopt the same style to answer their own
+purposes, menacing their disobedient charges with
+hobgoblins, phantoms and witches. Such images as these
+make a profound impression on tender minds, leaving a
+panic terror which the reasoning of after years is often
+unable entirely to efface. There can be no doubt but that
+this pernicious habit, is the fruit of the noxious plant
+fostered in the Vatican. Rising generations must be
+brought up in superstitious terror, in order to render
+them susceptible to every kind of absurdity; for this
+terror is the powerful spring, employed by the priests
+and friars, to move at their pleasure families, cities,
+provinces, nations. Although in families of the higher
+order, this method of alarming infancy is much
+discountenanced, nevertheless, it is impossible but that
+it should in some degree prevail in the nursery. Nor was
+it probable that I should escape this infections malady,
+having passed my whole days in an atmosphere, charged
+more than any other with that impure miasma priest-craft."]
+
+Then immediately I heard the question, and it seemed to
+come from the figure of Christ, "Will you obey? Will you
+leave off sin?" I answered in the affirmative as well as
+I could, for the convulsive sobs that shook my frame
+almost stopped my utterance. I now know that when the
+priest left me, he placed himself, or an assistant, behind
+a curtain close to the images, and it was his voice that
+I heard. But I was then too young to detect their
+treacherous practices and deceitful ways.
+
+On being taken back to the Superior, I was immediately
+attacked with severe illness, and had fits all night. It
+seemed to me that I could see that image of the devil
+everywhere. If I closed my eyes, I thought I could feel
+him on my bed, pressing on my breast, and he was so heavy
+I could scarcely breathe. I was very sick, and suffered
+much bodily pain, but the tortures of an excited imagination
+were greater by far, and harder to bear than any physical
+suffering. For long years after, that image haunted my
+dreams, and even now I often, in sleep, live over again
+the terrors of that fearful scene. I was sick a long
+time; how long I do not know; but I became so weak I
+could not raise myself in bed, and they had an apparatus
+affixed to the wall to raise me with. For several days
+I took no nourishment, except a teaspoonful of brandy
+and water which was given me as often as I could take it
+I continued to have fits every day for more than two
+years, nor did I ever entirely recover from the effects
+of that fright. Even now, though years have passed away,
+a little excitement or a sudden shock, will sometimes
+throw me into one of those fits.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+A SLAVE FOR LIFE.
+
+During this illness I was placed under the care of an
+Abbess whom they called St. Bridget. There were many
+other Abbesses in the convent, but she was the principal
+one, and had the care of all the clothing. If the others
+wished for clean clothes, they were obliged to go to her
+for them. In that way I saw them all, but did not learn
+their names. They approached me and looked at me, but
+seldom spoke. This I thought very strange, but I now know
+they dared not speak. One day an Abbess came to my bed,
+and after standing a few moments with the tears silently
+flowing down her cheeks, asked me if I had a mother. I
+told her I had not, and I began to weep most bitterly.
+I was very weak, and the question recalled to my mind
+the time when I shared a father's love, and enjoyed my
+liberty. Then, I could go and come as I chose, but now,
+a slave for life, I could have no will of my own, I must
+go at bidding, and come at command. This, I am well
+aware, may seem to some extravagant language; but I use
+the right word. I was, literally, a slave; and of all
+kinds of slavery, that which exists in a convent is the
+worst. I say, THE WORST, because the story of wrong and
+outrage which occasionally finds its way to the public
+ear, is not generally believed. You pity the poor black
+man who bends beneath the scourge of southern bondage,
+for the tale comes to you from those who have seen his
+tears and heard his groans. But you have no tears, no
+prayers, no efforts for the poor helpless nun who toils
+and dies beneath the heartless cruelty of an equally
+oppressive task-master. No; for her you have no sympathy,
+for you do not believe her word. Within those precincts
+of cruelty, no visitor is ever admitted. No curious eye
+may witness the secrets of their prison-house.
+Consequently, there is no one to bear direct testimony
+to the truth of her statements. Even now, methinks, I
+see your haughty brow contract, and your lip curl with
+scorn, as with supreme contempt you throw down these
+pages and exclaim, "'Tis all a fiction. Just got up to
+make money. No proof that it is true." No proof do you
+say? O, that the strong arm of the law would interpose
+in our behalf!--that some American Napoleon would come
+forth, and break open those prison doors, and drag forth
+to the light of day those hidden instruments of torture!
+There would then be proof enough to satisfy the most
+incredulous, that, so far from being exaggerated, the
+half has not been told. Sons of America! Will you not
+arise in your might, and demand that these convent doors
+be opened, and "the oppressed" allowed to "go free"? Or
+if this be denied, sweep from the fair earth, the
+black-hearted wretches who dare, in the very face of
+heaven, to commit such fearful outrages upon helpless,
+suffering humanity? How long--O how long will you suffer
+these dens of iniquity to remain unopened? How long permit
+this system of priestly cruelty to continue?
+
+But I am wandering from my story. Would that I might
+forever wander from it--that I might at once blot from
+memory's page, the fearful recollection that must follow
+me to my grave! Yet, painful as it is to rehearse the
+past, if I can but awaken your sympathy for other sufferers,
+if I can but excite you to efforts for their deliverance,
+it is all I ask. I shall have my reward. But to return
+to my story.
+
+The Abbess saw how deeply I was grieved, and immediately
+left the room. St. Bridget told me not to cry, for she
+would be a mother to me as long as I remained with her,
+and she was true to her promise. Another sister, who
+sometimes came to my room, I believe was crazy. She would
+run up to my bed, put her hand on me, and burst into a
+loud and hearty laugh. This she repeated as often as she
+came, and I told the Abbess one day, I did wish that
+sister would not come to see me, for she acted so strange,
+I was afraid of her. She replied, "do not care for her;
+she always does just so, but we do not mind her; you must
+be careful what you say," she continued, "for if you
+speak of her before any of the sisters, they may get you
+into trouble."
+
+When I began to get better, I had a sharp appetite for
+food, and was hungry a great part of the time. One of
+the sisters used to bring me a piece of bread concealed
+under her cape and hide it under my pillow. How she
+obtained it, I do not know, unless she saved it from her
+own allowance. It was very easy for her to hide it in
+this way, for the nuns always walk with one hand under
+their cape and the other by the side. Truly, in this
+instance, "bread eaten in secret" was "pleasant." Of all
+the luxuries I ever tasted, those stolen bits of bread
+were the sweetest.
+
+During my illness I thought a great deal about my father,
+and wondered why he did not come to see me, as he had
+promised. I used to cry for him in my sleep, and very
+often awoke in tears. St. Bridget sought in every possible
+way to make me forget him, and the priest would tell me
+that I need not think so much about him, for he no longer
+cared for me. He said the devil had got him, and I would
+never see him again. These cruel words, so far from making
+me forget, served to awaken a still greater desire to
+see him, and increased my grief because I was denied the
+privilege.
+
+In the room with me, were six other little girls, who
+were all sick at the same time, and St. Bridget took care
+of us all For two of the little girls, I felt the greatest
+sympathy. They were quite young, I think not more than
+three years of age, and they grieved continually. They
+made no complaint, did not even shed a tear, but they
+sobbed all the time, whether asleep or awake. Of their
+history, I could learn nothing at that time, except the
+fact, that they were taken from their parents for the
+good of their souls. I afterwards overheard a conversation
+that led me to think that they were heirs to a large
+property, which, if they were out of the way, would go
+to the church. But it is of what I know, and not what I
+think, that I have undertaken to write, and I do know
+that the fate of those little girls was hard in the
+extreme, whatever might have been the cause of their
+being there. Poor little creatures! No wonder their
+hearts were broken. Torn from parents and friends while
+yet in early childhood--doomed while life is spared, to
+be subject to the will of those who know no mercy--who
+feel no pity, but consider it a religious duty to crush,
+and destroy all the pure affections--all the exquisite
+sensibilities of the human soul. Yet to them these hapless
+babes must look for all the earthly happiness they could
+hope to enjoy. They were taught to obey them in all
+things, and consider them their only friends and protectors.
+I never saw them after I left that room, but they did
+not live long. I was glad they did not, for in the cold
+grave their sufferings would be over and they would rest
+in peace.
+
+O, how little do Protestants know the sufferings of a
+nun! and truly no one can know them except by personal
+experience. One may imagine the most aggravated form of
+cruelty, the most heart-rending agonies, yet I do believe
+the conception of the most active imagination would fall
+far short of the horrible reality. I do not believe there
+was one happy individual in that convent, or that any
+one there, if I except the lady Superior, knew anything
+of enjoyment. Life with them was a continual round of
+ceaseless toil and bitter self-denial; while each one
+had some secret grief slowly but surely gnawing away the
+heart-strings. I have sometimes seen the Abbess sitting
+by the bedside of the sick, with her eyes closed, while
+the big tears fell unchecked over her pale cheeks. When
+I asked her why she wept, she would shake her head, but
+never speak. I now know that she dare not speak for fear
+of punishment.
+
+The abbesses in the various parts of this convent are
+punished as much as the nuns, if they dare to disobey
+the rules of the priests; and if the least of these are
+broken in the presence of any one in the house, they will
+surely tell of it at confession. In fact, they are
+required to do this; and if it is known that one has seen
+a rule broken, or a command disobeyed, without reporting
+it, a severe punishment is sure to follow. Thus every
+individual is a spy upon the rest; and while every failure
+is visited with condign punishment, the one who makes
+the most reports is so warmly approved, that poor human
+nature can hardly resist the temptation to play the
+traitor. Friendship cannot exist within the walls of a
+convent, for no one can be trusted, even with the most
+trifling secret. Whoever ventures to try it is sure to
+be betrayed.
+
+While I was sick Father Darity came often to see me, and
+by his kindness succeeded in gaining my affections. I
+was a great favorite with him; he always called me his
+little girl, and tried in every way to make me contented.
+He wished to make me say that I was happy there, that I
+liked to live with them as well as with my father. But
+I could never be persuaded to say this, for it was not
+the truth, and I would not tell a falsehood unless forced
+to do so. He said I must be a good girl, and he hoped I
+would sometime see better times, but I could never see
+my father again, and I must not desire it. He advised
+me, however hard it might be, to try and love all who
+came into the nunnery, even those who were unkind, who
+wished to injure me or wound my feelings. He told me how
+Jesus Christ loved his enemies; how he died for them a
+cruel death on the cross; how, amid his bitter agonies,
+he prayed for them, and with his expiring breath he cried,
+"Father, forgive them, they know not what they do." "And
+now," said he, "can you do as Jesus Christ did? He has
+set you an example, can you not follow it?" "No, sir,"
+I replied, "I cannot love those who punish me so cruelly,
+so unjustly. I cannot love the little girl who reported
+what I said in the yard, when she said as bad things as
+I did." "But you forget," said he, "that in doing this
+she only obeyed the rules of the house. She only did her
+duty; if you had done yours, you would have reported
+her." "I'll never do that," I exclaimed, emboldened by
+his kindness. "It is a bad rule, and--" "Hush, hush,
+child!" he cried, interrupting me. "Do you know to whom
+you are speaking? and do you forget that you are a little
+girl? Are you wiser than your teachers? I must give you
+a penance for those naughty words, and you will pray for
+a better spirit." He said much more to me, and gave me
+good advice that I remember much better than I followed.
+He enjoined if upon me to keep up good courage, as I
+would gain my health faster. He then bade me farewell,
+telling me not to forget, to repeat certain prayers as
+a penance for my sin in speaking so boldly. O, did he
+think when he talked to me so kindly, so faithfully, that
+it was his last opportunity to give me good advice? Did
+he know that he left me to return no more? I saw nothing
+unusual in his appearance, and I did not suspect that it
+was the last time I should see his pleasant face and
+listen to his kindly voice. I loved that man, and bitter
+were the tears I shed when I learned that I should never
+see him again. The Abbess informed me that he was sent
+away for something he had done, she did not know what.
+O that something! I knew well enough what it was. He had
+a kind heart; he could feel for the unfortunate, and
+that, with the Roman Catholics, is an "unpardonable sin."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+CEREMONY OF CONFIRMATION.
+
+I continued to regain my health slowly, and the Abbess
+said they would soon send me back to the nursery. I could
+not endure the thought of this, for I had the greatest
+fear of the Abbess who had the charge of that department.
+She was very cruel, while St. Bridget was as kind as she
+dare to be. She knew full well that if she allowed
+herself to exhibit the least feeling of affection for
+those children, she would be instantly removed, and some
+one placed over them who would not give way to such
+weakness. We all saw how it was, and loved her all the
+more for the severity of her reproofs when any one was
+near. With tears, therefore, I begged to be allowed to
+stay with her; and when the priest came for me, she told
+him that she thought I had better remain with her till
+I gained a little more strength.
+
+To this he consented, and I was very grateful indeed for
+the kindness. Wishing in some way to express my gratitude,
+as soon as I was able I assisted in taking care of the
+other little girls as much as possible. St. Bridget, in
+turn, taught me to read a little, so that I could learn
+my prayers when away from her. She also gave me a few
+easy lessons in arithmetic, and instructed me to speak
+the Celt language. She always spoke in that, or the
+French, which I could speak before, having learned it
+from the family where I lived after my father gave up
+his saloon. They were French Catholics and spoke no other
+language.
+
+As soon as I was sufficiently recovered to leave my room,
+I was taken to the chapel to be confirmed. Before they
+came for me, the abbess told me what questions would be
+asked, and the answers I should be required to give. She
+said they would ask me if I wished to see my father; if
+I should like to go back to the world, etc. To these and
+similar questions she said I must give a negative answer.
+"But," said I, "that will be a falsehood, and I will not
+say so for any of them." "Hush, hush, child!" she exclaimed,
+with a frightened look. "You must not talk so. From my
+heart I pity you; but it will be better for you to answer
+as I tell you, for if you refuse they will punish you
+till you do. Remember," she added, emphatically, "remember
+what I say: it will be better for you to do as I tell
+you." And she made me promise that I would. "But why do
+they wish me to tell a lie?" I asked. "They do not wish
+you to tell a lie," she replied; "they wish you to do
+right, and feel right; to be contented and willing to
+forget the world." "But I do not wish to forget the
+world," I said. "I am not contented, and saying that I
+am will not make me feel so. Is it right to tell a lie?"
+"It is right for you to obey," she replied, with more
+severity in her tone than I ever heard before. "Do you
+know," she continued," that it is a great sin for you to
+talk so?" "A sin!" I exclaimed, in astonishment; "why is
+it a sin?" "Because," she replied, "you have no right to
+inquire why a command is given. Whatever the church
+commands, we must obey, and that, too, without question
+or complaint. If we are not willing to do this, it is
+the duty of the Bishop and the priests to punish us until
+we are willing. All who enter a convent renounce forever
+their own will." "But I didn't come here myself," said
+I;" my father put me here to stay a few years. When I am
+eighteen I shall go out again." "That does not make any
+difference," she replied. "You are here, and your duty
+is obedience. But my dear," she continued, "I advise you
+never again to speak of going out, for it can never be.
+By indulging such hopes you are preparing yourself for
+a great disappointment. By speaking of it, you will, I
+assure you, get yourself into trouble. You may not find
+others so indulgent as I am; therefore, for your own
+sake, I hope you will relinquish all idea of ever leaving
+the convent, and try to be contented." Such was the kind
+of instruction I received at the White Nunnery. I did
+not feel as much disappointed at the information that I
+was never to go into the world again as she had expected.
+I had felt for a long time, almost, indeed, from my first
+entrance, that such would be my fate, and though deeply
+grieved, I was able to control my feelings.
+
+The great day at length came for which the Abbess had
+been so long preparing me. I say great, for in our
+monotonous life, the smallest circumstance seemed important.
+Moreover, I was assured that my future happiness depended
+very much upon the answers, I that day gave to the various
+questions put to me. When about to be taken to the chapel,
+St. Bridget begged the priest to be careful and not
+frighten me, lest it should bring on my fits again. I
+was led into the chapel and made to kneel before the
+altar. The bishop and five priests were present, and
+also, a man whom I had never seen before, but I was told
+he was the Pope's Nuncio, and that he came a long way to
+visit them. I think this was true, for they all seemed
+to regard him as a superior. I shall never forget my
+feelings when he asked me the following questions, which
+I answered as I had been directed. "Who do you believe
+in?" "God." "How many persons are there in God?" "Three;
+the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost" "What world have you
+lately left?" "The world of sin and Satan." "Do you wish
+to go back and live with your father?" "No Sir." "Do you
+think you can live all your life with us." "I think I
+can, sir." He then said, "You will not fare any better
+than you have hitherto, and perhaps not as well." It was
+with the greatest difficulty that I could control my
+feelings sufficiently to answer this last question. But
+remembering what the Abbess had told me, I suppressed my
+tears, and choked down the rising sob. Surely those men
+must have known that I was telling a falsehood--that
+the profession I made was not in accordance with my real
+sentiments. For myself, I then felt, and still feel that
+the guilt was not mine. The sin did not rest with me.
+
+The Bishop was then told to hear my confession, after
+which, a priest took some ointment from a small box, and
+rubbed it on my forehead, and another priest came with
+a towel and wiped it off. I was then taken back to St.
+Bridget, with whom I remained, as long as I was in the
+White Nunnery.
+
+On my tenth birthday, the Bishop came to the Abbess very
+early in the morning, and informed her that I was to take
+the White Veil that day, and immediately after the
+ceremony, I would leave for the Grey Nunnery in Montreal.
+He desired her to make all the necessary preparation,
+and take her leave of me, as she would not see me again.
+This was sad news for us both, for I felt that she was
+my only friend, and I knew that she felt for me, the most
+sincere affection. She gave me much good advice in
+reference to my future conduct, and with tears exhorted
+me to be kind, cheerful, and obedient. I was going to a
+new place, she said, and if I was a good girl, and sought
+to please my superiors, I would find some one to be kind
+to me. She advised me to try and appear contented in
+whatever situation I might be placed, and above all other
+considerations, never disobey the least command.
+"Obedience," she again repeated, "is the rule in all
+convents, and it will be better for you to obey at once,
+and cheerfully, and willingly comply with every request,
+than to incur displeasure and perhaps punishment, by any
+appearance of reluctance or hesitation. If there is any
+one thing that you dislike to do, be sure that you do
+not betray your feelings, for if you do, that will be
+the very thing they will require of you; and I assure
+you, if you once become the object of suspicion or dislike,
+your condition will be anything but agreeable. You will
+be marked and watched, and required to do many unpleasant
+things, to say the least. Therefore I hope you will
+perform all your duties with a cheerful and willing
+spirit." Bitterly did I grieve at the thought of being
+separated from the only being on earth who seemed to care
+for me. In the anguish of the moment, I wished I might
+die. St. Bridget reproved me, saying encouragingly that
+death was the coward's refuge, sought only by those who
+had not the resolution to meet, endure, or overcome the
+trials of life. She exhorted me to courage, perseverance
+and self denial, saying that if I fought life's battle
+bravely, I would have my reward.
+
+She changed all my clothes, and assisted me to put on a
+white dress and cape, and a white cap and veil. She then
+gave me a card of good behavior, embraced me for the last
+time, and led me out to the Bishop, who was waiting to
+conduct me to the chapel where the ceremony was to be
+performed.
+
+I there met ten other little girls, who, like myself,
+were compelled to take upon themselves vows they did not
+understand, and thus, by an apparently voluntary act,
+consign themselves to slavery for life. They were all
+strangers to me, sent here, as I afterwards learned, from
+some nunnery in Ireland, where they had friends who were
+too solicitous for their welfare. The priests do not wish
+the nuns to see friends from the world, and they will
+frame almost any plausible excuse to prevent it. But when
+the friends become too urgent, as they sometimes do, and
+their inventive powers are taxed too severely, or if the
+task of furnishing so many excuses become too irksome,
+the poor hapless victims are sent off to some other
+nunnery, and the friends are told that they were not
+contented, and wished to go to some other place, and that
+they, generous creatures that they are, have at length,
+after much solicitation, kindly consented to their removal.
+And this too, when they know that these very girls are
+grieving their lives away, for a sight of those dear
+friends, who, they are confidently assured, are either
+dead, or have entirely forgotten them! Can the world of
+woe itself furnish deceit of a darker dye?
+
+The Bishop led me up to the altar, and put a lighted
+candle into my hand. He then went under the altar, on
+which a lighted candle was placed, and soon returned
+followed by two little boys whom they called apostles.
+They held, each, a lighted torch with which they proceeded
+to light two more candles. On a table near the altar,
+stood a coffin, and soon two priests entered, bearing
+another coffin, which they placed beside the other. A
+white cloth was spread over them, and burning candles
+placed at the head and foot. These movements frightened
+me exceedingly, for I thought they were going to kill me.
+
+Forgetting in my terror that I was not allowed to speak,
+I asked the Bishop if he was going to kill me. "Kill
+you!" he exclaimed, "O no; don't be frightened; I shall
+not hurt you in the least. But it is our custom, when a
+nun takes the veil, to lay her in a coffin to show that
+she is dead to the world. Did not St. Bridget tell you
+this?" I told him she did not, but I did not dare to tell
+him that I supposed she felt so bad when she found I must
+leave her, that she entirely forgot it. He then asked
+very pleasantly, which of the two coffins I liked the
+best, saying I could have my choice. I replied, "I have
+no choice." This was true, for although he assured me to
+the contrary, I still believed he was about to kill me,
+and I cared very little about my coffin. They were both
+large enough for a grown person, and beautifully finished,
+with a large silver plate on the lid. The Bishop took me
+up in his arms, and laid me in one of them, and bade me
+close my eyes.
+
+I lay in that coffin a long time, as it seemed to me,
+without the least motion. I was so much alarmed, I felt
+as though I could not even lift a finger. Meantime the
+Bishop and priests read alternately from a book, but in
+a language I could not understand. Occasionally they
+would come and feel my hands and feet, and say to each
+other, "She is very cold." I believe they were afraid I
+should die in their hands, of fear. When at last they
+took me up, they told me that I would carry that coffin
+to Montreal with me--that I would be laid in it when
+robed for the grave--and that my bones would moulder to
+dust in it. I shall never forget the impression these
+words made on my mind. There was something so horrible
+in the thought of carrying a coffin about with me all my
+life, constantly reminding me of the shortness of time,
+and the sure approach of death, I could not endure it.
+Gladly would I have left it, costly and elegant as it
+was, choosing rather to run the risk of being buried
+without one, but this was not allowed. I could have no
+choice in the matter.
+
+These ceremonies concluded. I was taken to a small room,
+and a woman assisted me to change my clothes again, and
+put on the Grey Nunnery suit. This consisted of a grey
+dress and shoes, and a black cap. Each nunnery has a
+peculiar dress which every nun is required to wear. Thus,
+on meeting one of them, it is very easy to tell what
+establishment she belongs to, and a run-away is easily
+detected. On leaving the chapel, I was taken to the
+steamboat, with the other ten girls, accompanied by a
+priest. Our coffins were packed in cotton, and placed on
+the boat with us. On our arrival at Montreal, we found
+a priest and two nuns waiting for us to conduct us to
+the nunnery.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+THE GREY NUNNERY.
+
+The Grey Nunnery is situated on St. Paul Street, Montreal.
+It is four stories high, besides the basement. It occupies
+a large space of ground, I do not know how much, but it
+is a very extensive building. The roof is covered with
+tin, with a railing around it, finished at the top with
+sharp points that look like silver, about a foot in
+length, and three feet apart. Over the front door there
+is a porch covered with a profusion of climbing plants,
+which give it a beautiful appearance. The building stands
+in a large yard, surrounded on all sides by a high fence,
+so high indeed, that people who pass along the street
+can see no part of the nunnery except the silver points
+on the roof. The top of this fence is also finished with
+long iron spikes. Every thing around the building seems
+expressly arranged to keep the inmates in, and intruders
+out. In fact it would be nearly impossible for any one
+to gain a forcible or clandestine admittance to any part
+of the establishment. There are several gates in the
+fence, how many I do not know, but the front gate opens
+on St. Ann Street. Over each of the gates hangs a bell,
+connected with the bells in the rooms of the Superior
+and Abbesses, which ring whenever the gate is opened.
+There is always a guard of two men at each gate, who walk
+up and down with guns upon their shoulders. While attempting
+to give a brief description of this building, I may as
+well say that it is constructed with non-conductors
+between the walls, so that the ringing of a bell, or the
+loudest shriek, could not be heard from one room to the
+other. The reader will please bear this in mind, as the
+reason for the precaution will appear in the course of
+my narrative.
+
+The priest, who met us as we left the boat, conducted us
+to the front door and rang the bell. Soon a lady appeared,
+who drew a slide in the middle of the door, exposing one
+pane of glass. Through this she looked, to see who was
+there, and when satisfied on this point, opened the door.
+Here let me remark, that since I left the nunnery, I have
+heard of another class of people who find it convenient
+to have a slide in their door; and if I am not very much
+mistaken, the character of the two houses, or rather the
+people who live in them, are very much alike, whether
+they are nunneries of private families, Catholics or
+Protestants. Honest people have no need of a slide in
+the door, and where there is so much precaution, may we
+not suppose that something behind the curtain imperatively
+calls for it? It is an old adage, but true notwithstanding,
+that "where there is concealment, there must be something
+wrong."
+
+In the hall opposite the front door were two other doors,
+with a considerable space between them. The right hand
+door was opened by the door-tender, and we entered a room
+furnished in the plainest manner, but every thing was
+neat, and in perfect order. Instead of chairs, on two
+sides of the room a long bench was fastened to the sides
+of the house. They were neither painted, nor cushioned,
+but were very white, as was also the floor, on which
+there was no carpet. Beside the door stood a basin of
+holy water, and directly opposite, an image of the Saviour
+extended on the cross which they call a crucifix.
+
+Here we were left a few moments, then the door-keeper
+came back, and asked us if we would like to see the Black
+Cloisters; and if so, to follow her. She led us back into
+the hall, and in the space between the two doors that I
+mentioned, she unlocked a bar, and pulling it down,
+touched a spring, and immediately a little square door
+slid back into the ceiling. Across this door, or window
+or whatever they called it, were strong bars of iron
+about one inch apart. Through this aperture we were
+allowed to look, and a sad sight met my eyes. As many
+as fifty disconsolate looking ladies were sitting there,
+who were called Black Nuns, because they were preparing
+to take the Black Veil. They were all dressed in black,
+a black cap on the head, and a white bandage drawn across
+the forehead, to which another was attached, that passed
+under the chin. These bandages they always wore, and were
+not allowed to lay aside. They sat, each one with a book
+in her hand, motionless as so many statues. Not a finger
+did they move, not an eye was raised, but they sat gazing
+upon the page before them as intently as though life
+itself depended upon it. Our guide informed us that they
+were studying the [footnote] Black Book preparatory to
+taking the Black Veil and entering the Cloister. This
+book was quite a curiosity. It was very large, with a
+white cover, and around the edge a black border about an
+inch wide.
+
+[Footnote: "The Black Book, or Praxis Sacra Romance
+Inquisitionis, is always the model for that which is to
+succeed it. This book is a large manuscript volume, in
+folio, and is carefully preserved by the head of the
+Inquisition. It is called Libro Nero, the Black Book,
+because it has a cover of that color; or, as an inquisitor
+explained to me, Libro Necro, which, in the Greek language,
+signifies 'The book of the dead.'
+
+"In this book is the criminal code, with all the punishments
+for every supposed crime; also the mode of conducting
+the trial, so as to elicit the guilt of the accused; and
+the manner of receiving accusations. I had this book in
+my hand on one occasion, and read therein the proceedings
+relative to my own case; and I moreover saw in this same
+volume some very astounding particulars; for example, in
+the list of punishments I read concerning the bit, or as
+it is called by us THE MORDACCHIA, which is a very simple
+contrivance to confine the tongue, and compress it between
+two cylinders composed of iron and wood and furnished
+with spikes. This horrible instrument not only wounds
+the tongue and occasions excessive pain, but also, from
+the swelling it produces; frequently places the sufferer
+in danger of suffocation. This torture is generally had
+recourse to in cases considered as blasphemy against God,
+the Virgin, the Saints, or the Pope. So that according
+to the Inquisition, it is as great a crime to speak
+disparagingly of a pope, who may be a very detestable
+character, as to blaspheme the holy name of God. Be that
+as it may, this torture has been in use till the present
+period; and, to say nothing of the exhibitions of this
+nature which were displayed in Romanga, in the time of
+Gregory 16th., by the Inquisitor Ancarani--in Umbria by
+Stefanelli, Salva, and others, we may admire the
+inquisitorial seal of Cardinal Feretti, the cousin of
+his present holiness, who condescended more than once to
+employ these means when he was bishop of Rieti and Fermo."
+Dealings with the Inquisition, by the Rev. Giacinto
+Achilli D. D., late Prior and Visitor of the Dominican
+Order, Head Professor of Theology and Vicar of the master
+of the Sacred Apostolic Palace, etc., etc., page 81.]
+
+Our curiosity being satisfied as far as possible, we
+returned to the side room, where we waited long for the
+lady Superior. When at length she came, she turned to me
+first, as I sat next the door, and asked me if I had
+anything to show in proof of my former good character.
+I gave her my card; she looked at it, and led me to the
+other side of the room. The same question was asked of
+every girl in turn, when it was found that only four
+beside myself had cards of good behavior. The other six
+presented cards which she said were for bad behavior.
+They were all placed together on the other side of the
+room; and as the Superior was about to lead them away,
+one of them came towards us saying that she did not wish
+to stay with those girls, she would rather go with us.
+The Superior drew her back, and replied, "No, child; you
+cannot go with those good girls; you would soon learn
+them some of your naughty ways. If you will do wrong,
+you must take the consequences." Then, seeing that the
+child really felt very bad, she said, in a kinder tone,
+"When you learn to do right, you shall be allowed to go
+with good girls, but not before." I pitied the poor child,
+and for a long time I hoped to see her come to our room;
+but she never came. They were all led off together, and
+that was the last I ever saw of any of them.
+
+I was taken, with the other four girls, to a room on the
+second floor. Here we found five cribs, one for each of
+us, in which we slept. Our food was brought to us regularly,
+consisting of one thin slice of fine wheat bread for each
+of us, and a small cup of milk. It was only in the morning,
+however, that the milk was allowed us, and for dinner
+and supper we had a slice of bread and a cup of water.
+This was not half enough to satisfy our hunger; but we
+could have no more. For myself I can say that I was hungry
+all the time, and I know the others were also; but we
+could not say so to each other. We were in that room
+together five weeks, yet not one word passed between us.
+We did sometimes smile, or shake our heads, or make some
+little sign, though even this was prohibited, but we
+never ventured to speak. We were forbidden to do so, on
+pain of severe punishment; and I believe we were watched
+all the time, and kept there, for a trial of our obedience.
+We were employed in peeling a soft kind of wood for beds,
+and filling the ticks with it. We were directed to make
+our own beds, keep our room in the most perfect order,
+and all our work in the middle of the floor. The Superior
+came up every morning to see that we were thoroughly
+washed, and every Saturday she was very particular to
+have our clothes and bed linen all changed. As every
+convenience was provided in our rooms or the closets
+adjoining, we were not obliged to go out for anything,
+and for five weeks I did not go out of that room.
+
+My bed was then brought from Quebec, and we were moved
+to a large square room, with four beds in it, only two
+of which were occupied. We were then sent to the kitchen,
+where in future, we were to be employed in cleaning sauce,
+scouring knives and forks, and such work as we were able
+to do. As we grew older, our tasks were increased with
+our strength. I had no regular employment, but was called
+upon to do any of the drudgery that was to be done about
+the house. The Superior came to the kitchen every morning
+after prayers and told us what to do through the day.
+Then, in her presence we were allowed five minutes
+conversation, a priest also being present. For the rest
+of the day we kept a profound silence, not a word being
+spoken by any of us unless in answer to a question from
+some of our superiors.
+
+In one part of the building there was a school for young
+ladies, who were instructed in the various branches of
+education usually taught in Catholic schools. Many of
+the scholars boarded at the nunnery, and all the cooking
+and washing was done in the kitchen. We also did the
+cooking for the saloons in Montreal. If this did not keep
+us employed, there were corn brooms and brushes to make,
+and thus every moment was fully occupied. Not a moment
+of leisure, no rest, no recreation, but hard labor, and
+the still more laborious religious exercises, filled up
+the time. It was sometimes very annoying to me to devote
+so many hours to mere external forms; for I felt, even
+when very young, that they were of little worth. But it
+was a severe trial to our temper to make so many pies,
+cakes, puddings, and all kinds of rich food, which we
+were never allowed to taste. The priests, superiors, and
+the scholars had every luxury they desired; but the nuns,
+who prepared all their choice dainties, were never
+permitted to taste anything but bread and water. I am
+well aware that this statement will seem incredible, and
+that many will doubt the truth of it; but I repeat it:
+the nuns in the Grey Nunnery, or at least those in the
+kitchen with me, were allowed no food except bread and
+water, or, in case of illness, water gruel.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+ORPHAN'S HOME.
+
+The Grey Nunnery is said to be an orphan's home, and no
+effort is spared to make visitors believe that this is
+the real character of the house. I suppose it is true
+that one part of it is devoted to this purpose; at least
+my Superior informed me that many children were kept
+there; and to those apartments visitors are freely
+admitted, but never to that part occupied by the nuns.
+We were never allowed to communicate with people from
+the world, nor with the children. In fact, during all
+the time I was there, I never saw one of them, nor did
+I ever enter the rooms where they were.
+
+In the ladies' school there were three hundred scholars,
+and in our part of the house two hundred and fifty nuns,
+besides the children who belonged to the nunnery. Add to
+these the abbesses, superiors, priests, and bishop, and
+one will readily imagine that the work for such a family
+was no trifling affair.
+
+In this nunnery the Bishop was the highest authority,
+and everything was under his direction, unless the Pope's
+Nuncio, or some other high church functionary was present.
+I sometimes saw one whom they called the Archbishop, who
+was treated with great deference by the priests, and even
+by the Bishop himself.
+
+The Holy Mother, or Lady Superior, has power over all
+who have taken or are preparing to take the veil. Under
+her other superiors or abbesses are appointed over the
+various departments, whose duty it is to look after the
+nuns and novices, and the children in training for nuns.
+The most rigid espionage is kept up throughout the whole
+establishment; and if any of these superiors or abbesses
+fail to do the duty assigned them, they are more severely
+punished than the nuns. Whenever the Lady Superior is
+absent the punishments are assigned by one of the priests.
+Of these there were a large number in the nunnery; and
+whenever we chanced to meet one of them, as we sometimes
+did when going about the house, or whenever one of them
+entered the kitchen, we must immediately fall upon our
+knees. No matter what we were doing, however busily
+employed, or however inconvenient it might be, every
+thing must be left or set aside, that this senseless
+ceremony might be performed. The priest must be honored,
+and woe to the poor nun who failed to move with sufficient
+alacrity; no punishment short of death itself was thought
+too severe for such criminal neglect. Sometimes it would
+happen that I would be engaged in some employment with
+my back to the door, and not observe the entrance of a
+priest until the general movement around me would arrest
+my attention; then I would hasten to "make my manners,"
+as the ceremony was called; but all too late. I had been
+remiss in duty, and no excuse would avail, no apology be
+accepted, no forgiveness granted; the dreaded punishment
+must come.
+
+While the nuns are thus severely treated, the priests,
+and the Holy Mother live a very easy life, and have all
+the privileges they wish. So far as the things of this
+world are concerned, they seem to enjoy themselves very
+well. But I have sometimes wondered if conscience did
+not give them occasionally, an unpleasant twinge; and
+from some things I have seen, I believe, that with many
+of them, this is the fact. They may try to put far from
+them all thoughts of a judgment to come, yet I do believe
+that their slumbers are sometimes disturbed by fearful
+forebodings of a just retribution which may, after all,
+be in store for them. But whatever trouble of mind they
+may have, they do not allow it to interfere with their
+worldly pleasures, and expensive luxuries. They have
+money enough, go when, and where they please, eat the
+richest food and drink the choicest wines. In short, if
+sensual enjoyment was the chief end of their existence,
+I do not know how they could act otherwise. The Abbesses
+are sometimes allowed to go out, but not unless they have
+a pass from one of the priests, and if, at any time, they
+have reason to suspect that some one is discontented,
+they will not allow any one to go out of the building
+without a careful attendant.
+
+My Superior here, as in the White Nunnery, was very kind
+to me. I sometimes feared she would share the fate of
+Father Darity, for she had a kind heart, and was guilty
+of many benevolent acts, which, if known, would have
+subjected her to very serious consequences. I became so
+much attached to her, that my fears for her were always
+alarmed when she called me her good little girl, or used
+any such endearing expression. The sequel of my story
+will show that my fears were not unfounded; but let me
+not anticipate. Sorrows will thicken fast enough, if we
+do not hasten them.
+
+I lived with this Superior one year before I was
+consecrated, and it was, comparatively, a happy season.
+I was never punished unless it was to save me from less
+merciful hands; and then I would be shut up in a closet,
+or some such simple thing. The other four girls who
+occupied the room with me, were consecrated at the same
+time.
+
+The Bishop came to our room early one morning, and took
+us to the chapel. At the door we were made to kneel, and
+then crawl on our hands and knees to the altar, where
+sat a man, who we were told, was the Archbishop. Two
+little boys came up from under the altar, with the vesper
+lamp to burn incense. I suppose they were young Apostles,
+for they looked very much like those we had seen at the
+White Nunnery, and were dressed in the same manner. The
+Bishop turned his back, and they threw incense on his
+head and shoulders, until he was surrounded by a cloud
+of smoke. He bowed his head, smote upon his breast, and
+repeated something in latin, or some other language, that
+we did not understand. We were told to follow his example,
+and did so, as nearly as possible. This ceremony over,
+the Bishop told us to go up on to the altar on our knees,
+and when this feat was performed to his satisfaction, he
+placed a crown of thorns upon each of our heads. These
+crowns were made of bands of some firm material, which
+passed over the head and around the forehead. On the
+inside thorns were fastened, with the points downward,
+so that a very slight pressure would cause them to pierce
+the skin. This I suppose is intended to imitate the
+crown of thorns which our Saviour wore upon the cross.
+But what will it avail them to imitate the crucifixion
+and the crown of thorns, while justice and mercy are so
+entirely neglected? What will it avail to place a crown
+of thorns upon a child's head, or to bid her kneel before
+the image of the Saviour, or travel up stairs on her
+knees, while the way of salvation by Christ is never
+explained to her; while of real religion, holiness of
+heart, and purity of life she is as ignorant as the most
+benighted, degraded heathen? Is it rational to suppose
+that the mere act of repeating a prayer can heal the
+wounded spirit, or give peace to a troubled conscience?
+Can the most cruel penance remove the sense of guilt, or
+whisper hope to the desponding soul? Ah, no! I have tried
+it long enough to speak with absolute certainty. For
+years I practiced these senseless mummeries, and if there
+were any virtue, in them, I should, most certainly have
+discovered it. But I know full well, and my reader knows
+that they cannot satisfy the restless yearnings of the
+immortal mind. They may delude the vulgar, but they cannot
+dispel the darkness of the tomb, they cannot lead a soul
+to Christ.
+
+On leaving the chapel after the ceremony, I found a new
+Superior, waiting for us at the door to conduct us to
+our rooms. We were all very much surprised at this, but
+she informed us that our old Superior died that morning,
+that she was already buried, and she had come to take
+her place. I could not believe this story, for she came
+to us as usual that morning, appeared in usual health,
+though always very pale, and made no complaint, or
+exhibited any signs of illness. She told us in her kind
+and pleasant way that we were to be consecrated, gave us
+a few words of advice, but said nothing about leaving
+us, and I do not believe she even thought of such a thing.
+Little did I think, when she left us, that I was never
+to see her again. But so it was. In just two hours and
+a half from that time, we were told that she was dead
+and buried, and another filled her place! A probable
+story, truly! I wonder if they thought we believed it!
+But whether we did or not, that was all we could ever
+know about it. No allusion was ever made to the subject,
+and nuns are not allowed to ask questions. However excited
+we might feel, no information could we seek as to the
+manner of her death. Whether she died by disease, or by
+the hand of violence; whether her gentle spirit peacefully
+winged its way to the bosom of its God, or was hastily
+driven forth upon the dagger's point, whether some kind
+friend closed her eyes in death, and decently robed her
+cold limbs for the grave, or whether torn upon the
+agonizing rack, whether she is left to moulder away in
+some dungeon's gloom, or thrown into the quickly consuming
+fire, we could never know. These, and many other questions
+that might have been asked, will never be answered until
+the last great day, when the grave shall give up its
+dead, and, the prison disclose its secrets.
+
+After the consecration we were separated, and only one
+of the girls remained with me. The others I never saw
+again. We were put into a large room, where were three
+beds, one large and two small ones. In the large bed the
+Superior slept, while I occupied one of the small beds
+and the other little nun the other. Our new Superior was
+very strict, and we were severely punished for the least
+trifle--such, for instance, as making a noise, either in
+our own room or in the kitchen. We might not even smile,
+or make motions to each other, or look in each other's
+face. We must keep our eyes on our work or on the floor,
+in token of humility. To look a person full in the face
+was considered an unpardonable act of boldness. On
+retiring for the night we were required to lie perfectly
+motionless. We might not move a hand or foot, or even a
+finger. At twelve the bell rang for prayers, when we must
+rise, kneel by our beds, and repeat prayers until the
+second bell, when we again retired to rest. On cold winter
+nights these midnight prayers were a most cruel penance.
+It did seem as though I should freeze to death. But live
+or die, the prayers must be said, and the Superior was
+always there to see that we were not remiss in duty. If
+she slept at all I am sure it must have been with one
+eye open, for she saw everything. But if I obeyed in this
+thing, I found it impossible to lie as still as they
+required; I would move when I was asleep without knowing
+it. This of course could not be allowed, and for many
+weeks I was strapped down to my bed every night, until
+I could sleep without the movement of a muscle. I was
+very anxious to do as nearly right as possible, for I
+thought if they saw that I strove with all my might to
+obey, they would perhaps excuse me if I did fail to
+conquer impossibilities. In this, however, I was
+disappointed; and I at length became weary of trying to
+do right, for they would inflict severe punishments for
+the most trifling accident. In fact, if I give anything
+like a correct account of my convent life, it will be
+little else than a history of punishments. Pains, trials,
+prayers, and mortifications filled up the time. Penance
+was the rule, to escape it the exception.
+
+I neglected at the proper time to state what name was
+given me when I took the veil; I may therefore as well
+say in this place that my convent name was Sister Agnes.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII.
+
+CONFESSION AND SORROW OF NO AVAIL.
+
+It was a part of my business to wait upon the priests in
+their rooms, carry them water, clean towels, wine-glasses,
+or anything they needed. When entering a priest's room
+it was customary for a child to knock twice, an adult
+four times, and a priest three times. This rule I was
+very careful to observe. Whenever a priest opened the
+door I was required to courtesy, and fall upon my knees;
+but if it was opened by one of the waiters this ceremony
+was omitted. These waiters were the boys I have before
+mentioned, called apostles. It was also a part of my
+business to wait upon them, carry them clean frocks, etc.
+
+One day I was carrying a pitcher of water to one of the
+priests, and it being very heavy, it required both my
+hands and nearly all my strength to keep it upright. On
+reaching the door, however, I attempted to hold it with
+one hand (as I dare not set it down), while I rapped with
+the other. In so doing I chanced to spill a little water
+on the floor. Just at that moment the door was opened by
+the priest himself, and when he saw the water he was very
+angry. He caught me by the arm and asked what punishment
+he should inflict upon me for being so careless. I
+attempted to explain how it happened, told him it was an
+accident, that I was very sorry, and would try to be more
+careful in future. But I might as well have said that I
+was glad, and would do so again, for my confession,
+sorrow, and promises of future obedience were entirely
+thrown away, and might as well have been kept for some
+one who could appreciate the feeling that prompted them.
+
+He immediately led me out of his room, it being on the
+second floor, and down into the back yard. Here, in the
+centre of the gravel walk, was a grate where they put
+down coal. This grate he raised and bade me go down. I
+obeyed, and descending a few steps found myself in a coal
+cellar, the floor being covered with it for some feet in
+depth. On this we walked some two rods, perhaps, when
+the priest stopped, and with a shovel that stood near
+cleared away the coal and lifted a trap door. Through
+this we descended four or five steps, and proceeded along
+a dark, narrow passage, so low we could not stand erect,
+and the atmosphere so cold and damp it produced the most
+uncomfortable sensations. By the light of a small lantern
+which the priest carried in his hand, I was enabled to
+observe on each side the passage small doors, a few feet
+apart, as far as I could see. Some of them were open,
+others shut, and the key upon the outside. In each of
+these doors there was a small opening, with iron bars
+across it, through which the prisoner received food, if
+allowed to have any. One of these doors I was directed
+to enter, which I did with some difficulty, the place
+being so low, and I was trembling with cold and fear.
+The priest crawled in after me and tied me to the back
+part of the cell, leaving me there in midnight darkness,
+and locking the door after him. I could hear on all
+sides, as it seemed to me, the sobs, groans, and shrieks
+of other prisoners, some of whom prayed earnestly for
+death to release them from their sufferings.
+
+For twenty-four hours I was left to bear as I best could
+the pains and terrors of cold, hunger, darkness, and
+fatigue. I could neither sit or lie down, and every one
+knows how very painful it is to stand upon the feet a
+long time, even when the position can be slightly changed;
+how much more so when no change can be effected, but the
+same set of muscles kept continually on the stretch for
+the space of twenty-four hours! Moreover, I knew not how
+long I should be kept there. The other prisoners, whose
+agonizing cries fell upon my ears, were evidently suffering
+all the horrors of starvation. Was I to meet a fate like
+this? Were those terrible sufferings in reserve for me?
+How could I endure them? And then came the thought so
+often present with me while in the convent, "If there is
+a God in heaven, why does He permit such things? What
+have I done that I should become the victim of such
+cruelty? God of mercy!" I involuntarily exclaimed, "save
+me from this terrible death."
+
+My prayer was heard, my petition granted. At the close
+of twenty-four hours, the Lady Superior came and released
+me from my prison, told me to go to the priest and ask
+his forgiveness, and then go to my work in the kitchen.
+I was very faint and weak from my long fast, and I resolved
+never to offend again. I verily thought I could be careful
+enough to escape another such punishment. But I had not
+been in the kitchen one hour, when I chanced to let a
+plate fall upon the floor. It was in no way injured, but
+I had broken the rules by making a noise, and the Superior
+immediately reported me to the priest. He soon appeared
+with his bunch of keys and a dark lantern in his hand.
+He took me by the ear which he pinched till he brought
+tears to my eyes, saying, "You don't try to do well, and
+I'll make you suffer the consequences." I did not reply,
+for I had learned that to answer a priest, or seek to
+vindicate myself, or even to explain how things came to
+be so, was in itself a crime, to be severely punished.
+However unjust their treatment, or whatever my feelings
+might be, I knew it was better to suffer in silence.
+
+Unlocking a door that opened out of the kitchen, and
+still keeping hold of my ear, he led me into a dark,
+gloomy hall, with black walls, and opening a door on the
+right, he bade me enter. This room was lighted by a
+candle, and around the sides, large iron hooks with heavy
+chains attached to them, were driven into the wall. At
+the back part of the room, he opened the door, and bade
+me enter a small closet. He then put a large iron ring
+over my head, and pressed it down upon my shoulders.
+Heavy weights were placed in my hands, and I was told to
+stand up straight, and hold them fifteen minutes. This
+I could not do. Had my life depended upon the effort, I
+could not have stood erect, with those weights in my
+hands. The priest, however, did not reprove me. Perhaps
+he saw that I exerted all my strength to obey, for he
+took out his watch, and slowly counted the minutes as
+they passed. Ere a third part of the time expired, he
+was obliged to release me, for the blood gushed from my
+nose and mouth, and I began to feel faint and dizzy. The
+irons were removed, and the blood ceased to flow.
+
+I was then taken to another room, lighted like the other,
+but it was damp and cold, and pervaded by a strong, fetid,
+and very offensive odor. The floor was of wood, and badly
+stained with blood. At least, I thought it was blood,
+but there was not light enough to enable me to say
+positively what it was. In the middle of the room, stood
+two long tables, on each of which, lay a corpse, covered
+with a white cloth. The priest led me to these tables,
+removed the cloth and bade me look upon the face of the
+dead. They were very much emaciated, and the features,
+even in death, bore the impress of terrible suffering.
+We stood there a few moments, when he again led me back
+to his own room. He then asked me what I thought of what
+I had seen. Having taken no food for more than twenty-four
+hours, I replied, "I am so hungry, I can think of nothing
+else." "How would you. like to eat those dead bodies?"
+he asked. "I would starve, Sir, before I would do it,"
+I replied. "Would you?" said he, with a slight sneer.
+"Yes indeed," I exclaimed, striving to suppress my
+indignant feelings. "What! eat the flesh of a corpse?
+You do not mean it. I would starve to death first!"
+Frightened at my own temerity in speaking so boldly, I
+involuntarily raised my eye. The peculiar smile upon his
+face actually chilled my blood with terror. He did not,
+however, seem to notice me, but said, "Do not be too
+sure; I have seen others quite as sure as you are, yet
+they were glad to do it to save their lives; and remember,"
+he added significantly, "you will do it too if you are
+not careful." He then ordered me to return to the kitchen.
+
+At ten o'clock in the morning, the nuns had a slice of
+bread and cup of water; but, as I had been fasting, they
+gave me a bowl of gruel, composed of indian meal and
+water, with a little salt. A poor dinner this, for a
+hungry person, but I could have no more. At eleven, we
+went to mass in the chapel as usual. It was our custom
+to have mass every day, and I have been told that this
+is true of all Romish establishments. Returning to my
+work in the kitchen, I again resolved that I would be so
+careful, that, in future they should have no cause for
+complaint For two days I succeeded. Yes, for two whole
+days, I escaped punishment. This I notice as somewhat
+remarkable, because I was generally punished every day,
+and sometimes two or three times in a day.
+
+On the third morning, I was dusting the furniture in the
+room occupied by the priest above mentioned, who treated
+me so cruelly. The floor being uncarpeted, in moving the
+chairs I chanced to make a slight noise, although I did
+my best to avoid it. He immediately sprang to his feet,
+exclaiming, "You careless dog! What did you do that for?"
+Then taking me by the arms, he gave me a hard shake,
+saying, "Have I not told you that you would be punished,
+if you made a noise? But I see how it is with you; your
+mind is on the world, and you think more of that, than
+you do of the convent. But I shall punish you until you
+do your duty better." He concluded this choice speech by
+telling me to "march down stairs." Of course, I obeyed,
+and he followed me, striking me on the head at every
+step, with a book he held in his hand. I thought to escape
+some of the blows, and hastened along, but all in vain;
+he kept near me and drove me before him into the priests
+sitting-room. He then sent for three more priests, to
+decide upon my punishment. A long consultation they held
+upon "this serious business," as I sneeringly thought
+it, but the result was serious in good earnest, I assure
+you. For the heinous offence of making a slight noise I
+was to have dry peas bound upon my knees, and then be
+made to crawl to St. Patrick's church, through an
+underground passage, and back again. This church was
+situated on a hill, a little more than a quarter of a
+mile from the convent. Between the two buildings, an
+under-ground passage had been constructed, just large
+enough to allow a person to crawl through it on the hands
+and knees. It was so low, and narrow, that it was
+impossible either to rise, or turn around; once within
+that passage there was no escape, but to go on to the
+end. They allowed me five hours to go and return; and
+to prove that I had really been there, I was to make a
+cross, and two straight lines, with a bit of chalk, upon
+a black-board that I should find at the end.
+
+O, the intolerable agonies I endured on that terrible
+pathway! Any description that I can give, will fail to
+convey the least idea of the misery of those long five
+hours. It may, perchance, seem a very simple mode of
+punishment, but let any one just try it, and they will
+be convinced that it was no trifling thing. At the end,
+I found myself in a cellar under the church, where there
+was light enough to enable me to find the board and the
+chalk. I made the mark according to orders, and then
+looked around for some means of escape. Alas! There was
+none to be found. Strong iron bars firmly secured the
+only door, and a very slight examination convinced me
+that my case was utterly hopeless. I then tried to remove
+the peas from my swollen, bleeding limbs, but this, too,
+I found impossible. They were evidently fastened by a
+practised hand; and I was, at length, compelled to believe
+that I must return as I came. I did return; but O, how,
+many times I gave up in despair, and thought I could go
+no further! How many times did I stretch myself on the
+cold stones, in such bitter agony, that I could have
+welcomed death as a friend and deliverer! What would I
+not have given for one glass of cold water, or even for
+a breath of fresh air! My limbs seemed on fire, and while
+great drops of perspiration fell from my face, my throat
+and tongue were literally parched with thirst. But the
+end came at last, and I found the priest waiting for me
+at the entrance. He seemed very angry, and said, "You
+have been gone over your time. There was no need of it;
+you could have returned sooner if you had chosen to do
+so, and now, I shall punish you again, for being gone so
+long." At first, his reproaches grieved me, for I had
+done my best to please him, and I did so long for one
+word of sympathy, it seemed for a moment, as though my
+heart would break. Had he then spoken one kind word to
+me, or manifested the least compassion for my sufferings,
+I could have forgiven the past, and obeyed him with
+feelings of love and gratitude for the future. Yes, I
+would have done anything for that man, if I could have
+felt that he had the least pity for me; but when he said
+he should punish me again, my heart turned to stone.
+Every tender emotion vanished, and a fierce hatred, a
+burning indignation, and thirst for revenge, took
+possession of my soul.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX.
+
+ALONE WITH THE DEAD.
+
+The priest removed the peas from my limbs, and led me to
+a tomb under the chapel, where he left me, with the
+consoling assurance that "THE DEAD WOULD RISE AND EAT
+ME!" This tomb was a large rectangular room, with shelves
+on three sides of it, on which were the coffins of priests
+and Superiors who had died in the nunnery. On the floor
+under the shelves, were large piles of human bones, dry
+and white, and some of them crumbling into dust. In the
+center of the room was a large tank of water, several
+feet in diameter, called St. Joseph's well. It occupied
+the whole center of the room leaving a very narrow pathway
+between that, and the shelves; so narrow, indeed, that
+I found it impossible to sit down, and exceedingly
+difficult to walk or even stand still. I was obliged to
+hold firmly by the shelves, to avoid slipping into the
+water which looked dark and deep. The priest said, when
+he left me, that if I fell in, I would drown, for no one
+could take me out.
+
+O, how my heart thrilled with superstitious terror when
+I heard the key turn in the lock, and realized that I
+was alone with the dead! And that was not the worst of
+it. They would rise and eat me! For a few hours I stood
+as though paralyzed with fear. A cold perspiration covered
+my trembling limbs, as I watched those coffins with the
+most painful and serious apprehension. Every moment I
+expected the fearful catastrophe, and even wondered which
+part they would devour first--whether one would come
+alone and thus kill me by inches, or whether they would
+all rise at once, and quickly make an end of me. I even
+imagined I could see the coffins move--that I heard the
+dead groan and sigh and even the sound of my own chattering
+teeth, I fancied to be a movement among the dry bones
+that lay at my feet. In the extremity of terror I shrieked
+aloud. But this I knew was utterly useless. Who would
+hear me? Or who would care if they did hear? I was
+surrounded by walls that no sound could penetrate, and
+if it could, it would fall upon ears deaf to the agonizing
+cry for mercy,--upon hearts that feel no sympathy for
+human woe.
+
+Some persons may be disposed to smile at this record of
+absurd and superstitions fear. But to me it was no laughing
+affair. Had not the priest said that the dead would rise
+and eat me? And did I not firmly believe that what he
+said was true? What! A priest tell a falsehood? Impossible.
+I thought it could not be; yet as hour after hour passed
+away, and no harm came to me, I began to exercise my
+reason a little, and very soon came to the conclusion
+that the priests are not the immaculate, infallible beings
+I had been taught to believe. Cruel and hard hearted,
+I knew them to be, but I did not suspect them of falsehood.
+Hitherto I had supposed it was impossible for them to do
+wrong, or to err in judgement; all their cruel acts being
+done for the benefit of the soul, which in some inexplicable
+way was to be benefited by the sufferings of the body.
+Now, however, I began to question the truth of many things
+I had seen and heard, and ere long I lost all faith in
+them, or in the terrible system of bigotry, cruelty and
+fraud, which they call religion.
+
+As the hours passed by and my fears vanished before the
+calm light of reason, I gradually gained sufficient
+courage to enable me to examine the tomb, thinking that
+I might perchance discover the body of my old Superior.
+For this purpose I accordingly commenced the circuit of
+the room, holding on by the shelves, and making my way
+slowly onward. One coffin I succeeded in opening, but
+the sight of the corpse so frightened me, I did not dare
+to open another. The room being brilliantly lighted with
+two large spermaceti candles at one end, and a gas
+burner at the other, I was enabled to see every feature
+distinctly.
+
+One of the nuns informed me that none but priests and
+Superiors are laid in that tomb. When these die in full
+communion with the church, the body is embalmed, and
+placed here, but it sometimes happens that a priest or
+Superior is found in the convent who does not believe
+all that is taught by the church of Rome. They desire to
+investigate the subject--to seek for more light--more
+knowledge of the way of salvation by Christ. This, with
+the Romanists is a great sin, and the poor hapless victim
+is at once placed under punishment. If they die in this
+condition, their bodies are cast out as heretics, but if
+they confess and receive absolution, they are placed in
+the tomb, but not embalmed. The flesh, of course, decays,
+and then the bones are thrown under the shelves. Never
+shall I forget how frightful those bones appeared to me,
+or the cold shudder that thrilled my frame at the sight
+of the numerous human skulls that lay scattered around.
+
+Twenty-four hours I spent in this abode of the dead,
+without rest or sleep. The attempt to obtain either would
+have been sheer madness, for the least mis-step, the
+least unguarded motion, or a slight relaxation of the
+firm grasp by which I held on to the shelves, would have
+plunged me headlong into the dark water, from which escape
+would have been impossible. For thirty hours I had not
+tasted food, and my limbs, mangled and badly swollen,
+were so stiff with long standing, that, when allowed to
+leave the tomb, I could hardly step. When the priest came
+to let me out, he seemed to think it necessary to say
+something to cover his attempt to deceive and frighten
+me, but he only made a bad matter worse. He said that
+after he left me, he thought he would try me once more,
+and see if I would not do my duty better; he had, therefore,
+WILLED THE DEAD NOT TO EAT ME! AND THEY, OBEDIENT TO HIS
+WILL, WERE COMPELLED TO LET ME ALONE! I did not reply to
+this absurd declaration, lest I should say something I
+ought not, and again incur his displeasure. Indeed, I
+was not expected to say anything, unless I returned thanks
+for his unparalleled kindness, and I was not hypocrite
+enough for that. I suppose he thought I believed all he
+said, but he was greatly mistaken. If I began to doubt
+his word while in the tomb, this ridiculous pretence only
+served to add contempt to unbelief, and from that time
+I regarded him as a deceiver, and a vile, unscrupulous,
+hypocritical pretender.
+
+It was with the greatest difficulty that I again made my
+way to the kitchen. I was never very strong, even when
+allowed my regular meals, for the quantity, was altogether
+insufficient, to satisfy the demands of nature; and now
+I had been so long without anything to eat, I was so
+weak, and my limbs so stiff and swollen, I could hardly
+stand. I managed, however, to reach the kitchen, when I
+was immediately seated at the table and presented with
+a bowl of gruel. O, what a luxury it seemed to me, and
+how eagerly did I partake of it! It was soon gone, and
+I looked around for a further supply. Another nun, who
+sat at the table with me, with a bowl of gruel before
+her, noticed my disappointment when I saw that I was to
+have no more. She was a stranger to me, and so pale and
+emaciated she looked more like a corpse than a living
+person. She had tasted a little of her gruel, but her
+stomach was too weak to retain it, and as soon as the
+Superior left us she took it up and poured the whole into
+my bowl, making at the same time a gesture that gave me
+to understand that it was of no use to her, and she wished
+me to eat it I did not wait for a second invitation, and
+she seemed pleased to see me accept it so readily. We
+dared not speak, but we had no difficulty in understanding
+each other.
+
+I had but just finished my gruel when the Superior came
+back and desired me to go up stairs and help tie a mad
+nun. I think she did this simply for the purpose of giving
+me a quiet lesson in convent life, and showing me the
+consequences of resistance or disobedience. She must have
+known that I was altogether incapable of giving the
+assistance she pretended to ask. But I followed her as
+fast as possible, and when she saw how difficult it was
+for me to get up stairs, she walked slowly and gave me
+all the time I wished for. She led me into a small room
+and closed the door. There I beheld a scene that called
+forth my warmest sympathy, and at the same time excited
+feelings of indignation that will never be subdued while
+reason retains her throne. In the center of the room sat
+a young girl, who could not have been more than sixteen
+years old; and a face and form of such perfect symmetry,
+such surpassing beauty, I never saw. She was divested of
+all her clothing except one under-garment, and her hands
+and feet securely tied to the chair on which she sat. A
+priest stood beside her, and as we entered he bade us
+assist him in removing the beds from the bedstead. They
+then took the nun from her chair and laid her on the
+bedcord. They desired me to assist them, but my heart
+failed me. I could not do it, for I was sure they were
+about to kill her; and as I gazed upon those calm,
+expressive features, so pale and sad, yet so perfectly
+beautiful, I felt that it would be sacrilege for me to
+raise my hand against nature's holiest and most exquisite
+work. I therefore assured them that I was too weak to
+render the assistance they required. At first they
+attempted to compel me to do it; but, finding that I was
+really very weak, and unwilling to use what strength I
+had, they at length permitted me to stand aside. When
+they extended the poor girl on the cord, she said, very
+quietly, "I am not mad, and you know that I am not." To
+this no answer was given, but they calmly proceeded with
+their fiendish work. One of them tied her feet, while
+the other fastened a rope across her neck in such a way
+that if she attempted to raise her head it would strangle
+her. The rope was then fastened under the bedcord, and
+two or three times over her person. Her arms were extended,
+and fastened in the same way. As she lay thus, like a
+lamb bound for the sacrifice, she looked up at her
+tormentors and said, "Will the Lord permit me to die in
+this cruel way?" The priest immediately exclaimed, in an
+angry tone, "Stop your talk, you mad woman!" and turning
+to me, he bade me go back to the kitchen. It is probable
+he saw the impression on my mind was not just what they
+desired, therefore he hurried me away.
+
+All this time the poor doomed nun submitted quietly to
+her fate. I suppose she thought it useless, yea, worse
+than useless, to resist; for any effort she might make
+to escape would only provoke them, and they would torment
+her the more. I presume she thought her last hour had
+come, and the sooner she was out of her misery the better.
+As for me, my heart was so filled with terror, anguish,
+and pity for her, I could hardly obey the command to
+leave the room.
+
+I attempted to descend the stairs, but was obliged to go
+very slowly on account of the stiffness of my limbs, and
+before I reached the bottom of the first flight the priest
+and the Superior came out into the hall. I heard them
+whispering together, and I paused to listen. This, I
+know, was wrong; but I could not help it, and I was so
+excited I did not realize what I was doing. My anxiety
+for that girl overpowered every other feeling. At first
+I could only hear the sound of their voices; but soon
+they spoke more distinctly, and I heard the words. "What
+shall we do with her? she will never confess." In an
+audible tone of voice, the other replied, "We had better
+finish her." How those words thrilled my soul! I knew
+well enough that they designed "to finish her," but to
+hear the purpose announced so coolly, it was horrible.
+Was there no way that I could save her? Must I stand
+there, and know that a fellow-creature was being murdered,
+that a young girl like myself, in all the freshness of
+youth and the fullness of health, was to be cut off in
+the very prime of life and numbered with the dead; hurried
+out of existence and plunged, unwept, unlamented, into
+darkness and silence? She had friends, undoubtedly, but
+they would never be allowed to know her sad fate, never
+shed a tear upon her grave! I could not endure the thought.
+I felt that if I lingered there another moment I should
+be in danger of madness myself; for I could not help her.
+I could not prevent the consummation of their cruel
+purpose; I therefore hastened away, and this was the last
+I ever heard of that poor nun. I had never seen her
+before, and as I did not see her clothes, I could not
+even tell whether she belonged to our nunnery or not.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X.
+
+THE SICK NUN.
+
+On my return to the kitchen I found the sick nun sitting
+as we left her. She asked me, by signs, if we were alone.
+I told her she need not fear to speak, for the Superior
+was two flights of stairs above, and no one else was
+near. "Are they all away?" she whispered. I assured her
+that we were quite alone, that she had nothing to fear.
+She then informed me that she had been nine days under
+punishment, that when taken from the cell she could not
+stand or speak, and she was still too weak to walk without
+assistance. "O!" said she, and the big tears rolled over
+her cheeks as she said it, "I have not a friend in the
+world. You do not know how my heart longs for love, for
+sympathy and kindness." I asked if she had not parents,
+or friends, in the world. She replied, "I was born in
+this convent, and know no world but this. You see," she
+continued, with a sad smile, "what kind of friends I have
+here. O, if I HAD A FRIEND, if I could feel that one
+human being cares for me, I should get better. But it is
+so long since I heard a kind word--" a sob choked her
+utterance. I told her I would be a friend to her as far
+as I could. She thanked me; said she was well aware of
+the difficulties that lay in my way, for every expression
+of sympathy or kind feeling between the nuns was strictly
+forbidden, and if caught in anything of the kind a severe
+correction would follow. "But," said she "if you will
+give me a kind look sometimes, whenever you can do so
+with safety, it will be worth a great deal to me. You do
+not know the value of a kind look to a breaking heart."
+
+She wept so bitterly, I feared it would injure her health,
+and to divert her mind, I told her where I was born;
+spoke of my childhood, and of my life at the White Nunnery.
+She wiped away her tears, and replied, "I know all about
+it. I have heard the priests talk about you, and they
+say that your father is yet living, that your mother was
+a firm protestant, and that it will be hard for them to
+beat Catholicism into you. But I do not know how you came
+in that nunnery. Who put you there?" I told her that I
+was placed there by my father, when only six years old.
+"Is it possible?" she exclaimed, and then added
+passionately, "Curse your father for it." After a moments
+silence, she continued, "Yes, child; you have indeed
+cause to curse your father, and the day when you first
+entered the convent; but you do not suffer as much as
+you would if you had been born here, and were entirely
+dependent on them. They fear that your friends may sometime
+look after you; and, in case they are compelled to grant
+them an interview, they would wish them to find you in
+good health and contented; but if you had no influential
+friends outside the convent, you would find yourself much
+worse off than you are now."
+
+She then said she wished she could get some of the brandy
+from the cellar. Her stomach was so weak from long fasting,
+it would retain neither food or drink, and she thought
+the brandy would give it strength. She asked if I could
+get it for her. The idea frightened me at first, for I
+knew that if caught in doing it, I should be most cruelly
+punished, yet my sympathy for her at length overcame my
+fears, and I resolved to try, whatever might be the
+result. I accordingly went up stairs, ostensibly, to see
+if the Superior wanted me, but really, to find out where
+she was, and whether she would be likely to come down,
+before I could have time to carry out my plan. I trembled
+a little, for I knew that I was guilty of a great
+misdemeanor in thus boldly presenting myself to ask if
+I was wanted; but I thought it no very great sin to
+pretend that I thought she called me, for I was sure my
+motives were good, whatever they might think of them. I
+had been taught that "the end sanctifies the means," and
+I thought I should not be too hardly judged by the great
+searcher of hearts, if, for once, I applied it in my own
+way.
+
+I knocked gently at the door I had left but a few moments
+before. It was opened by the Superior, but she immediately
+stepped out, and closed it again, so that I had no
+opportunity to see what was passing within. She sternly
+bade me return to the kitchen, and stay there till she
+came down; a command I was quite ready to obey. In the
+kitchen there was a small cupboard, called the key
+cupboard, in which they kept keys of all sizes belonging
+to the establishment. They were hung on hooks, each one
+being marked with the name of the place to which it
+belonged. It was easy for me to find the key to the
+cellar, and having obtained it, I opened another cupboard
+filled with bottles and vials, where I selected one that
+held half a pint, placed it in a large pitcher, and
+hastened down stairs. I soon found a cask marked "brandy,"
+turned the faucet, and filled the bottle. But my heart
+beat violently, and my hand trembled so that I could not
+hold it steady, and some of it ran over into the pitcher.
+It was well for me that I took this precaution, for if
+I had spilt it on the stone floor of the cellar, I should
+have been detected at once. I ran up stairs as quickly
+as possible, and made her drink what I had in the pitcher,
+though there was more of it than I should have given her
+under other circumstances; but I did not know what to do
+with it. If I put it in the fire, or in the sink, I
+thought they would certainly smell it, and, there was no
+other place, for I was not allowed to go out of doors.
+I then replaced the key, washed up my pitcher, and secreted
+the bottle of brandy in the waist of the nun's dress.
+This I could easily do, their dresses being made with a
+loose waist, and a large cape worn over them. I then
+began to devise some way to destroy the scent in the
+room. I could smell it very distinctly, and I knew that
+the Superior would notice it at once. After trying various
+expedients to no purpose, I at length remembered that I
+had once seen a dry rag set on fire for a similar purpose.
+I therefore took one of the cloths from the sink, and
+set it on fire, let it burn a moment, and threw it under
+the caldron.
+
+I was just beginning to congratulate myself on my success,
+when I saw that the nun appeared insensible, and about
+to fall from her chair. I caught her in my arms, and
+leaned her back in the chair, but I did not dare to lay
+her on the bed, without permission, even if I had strength
+to do it. I could only draw her chair to the side of
+the room, put a stick of wood under it, and let her head
+rest against the wall. I was very much frightened, and
+for a moment, thought she was dead. She was pale as a
+corpse, her eyes closed, and her mouth wide open. Had I
+really killed her? What if the Superior should find her
+thus? I soon found that she was not dead, for her heart
+beat regularly, and I began to hope she would get over
+it before any one came in. But just as the thought passed
+my mind, the door opened and the Superior appeared. Her
+first words were, "What have you been burning? What smells
+so?" I told her there was a cloth about the sink that I
+thought unfit for use, and I put it under the caldron.
+She then turned towards the nun and asked if she had
+fainted. I told her that I did not know, but I thought
+she was asleep, and if she wished me to awaken, and assist
+her to bed, I would do so. To this she consented, and
+immediately went up stairs again. Glad as I was of this
+permission, I still doubted my ability to do it alone,
+for I had little, very little strength; yet I resolved
+to do my best. It was long, however, before I could arouse
+her, or make her comprehend what I said, so entirely were
+her senses stupified with the brandy. When at length I
+succeeded in getting her upon her feet, she said she was
+sure she could not walk; but I encouraged her to help
+herself as much as possible, told her that I wished to
+get her away before any one came in, or we would be
+certainly found out and punished. This suggestion awakened
+her fears, and I at length succeeded in assisting her to
+bed. She was soon in a sound sleep, and I thought my
+troubles for that time were over. But I was mistaken. In
+my fright, I had quite forgotten the brandy in her dress.
+Somehow the bottle was cracked, and while she slept, the
+brandy ran over her clothes. The Superior saw it, and
+asked how she obtained it. Too noble minded to expose
+me, she said she drew it herself. I heard the Superior
+talking to a priest about it, and I thought they were
+preparing to punish her. I did not know what she had told
+them, but I did not think she would expose me, and I
+feared, if they punished her again, she would die in
+their hands.
+
+I therefore went to the Superior and told her the truth
+about it, for I thought a candid confession on my part
+might, perchance, procure forgiveness for the nun, if
+not for myself. But no; they punished us both; the nun
+for telling the lie, and me for getting the brandy. For
+two hours they made me stand with a crown of thorns on
+my head, while they alternately employed themselves in
+burning me with hot irons, pinching, and piercing me with
+needles, pulling my hair, and striking me with sticks.
+All this I bore very well, for I was hurt just enough to
+make me angry.
+
+When I returned to the kitchen again, the nun was sitting
+there alone. She shook her head at me, and by her gestures
+gave me to understand that some one was listening. She
+afterwards informed me that the Superior was watching
+us, to see if we would speak to each other when we met.
+I do not know how they punished her, but I heard a priest
+say that she would die if she suffered much more. Perhaps
+they thought the loss of that precious bottle of brandy
+was punishment enough. But I was glad I got it for her,
+for she had one good dose of it, and it did her good;
+her stomach was stronger, her appetite better, and in a
+few weeks she regained her usual health.
+
+One day, while at work as usual, I was called up stairs
+with the other nuns to see one die. She lay upon the bed,
+and looked pale and thin, but I could see no signs of
+immediate dissolution. Her voice was strong, and respiration
+perfectly natural, the nuns were all assembled in her
+room to see her die. Beside her stood a priest, earnestly
+exhorting her to confess her sins to him, and threatening
+her with eternal punishment if she refused. But she
+replied, "No, I will not confess to you. If, as you say,
+I am really dying, it is with my God I have to do; to
+him alone will I confess, for he alone can save." "If
+you do not confess to me," exclaimed the priest, "I will
+give you up to the devil." "Well," said she, "I stand in
+no fear of a worse devil than you are, and I am quite
+willing to leave you at any time, and try any other place;
+even hell itself cannot be worse. I cannot suffer more
+there than I have here." "Daughter," exclaimed the priest,
+with affected sympathy, "must I give you up? How can I
+see you go down to perdition? It is not yet too late.
+Confess your sins and repent." "I have already confessed
+my sins to God, and I shall confess to no one else. He
+alone can save me." Her manner of saying this was solemn
+but very decided. The priest saw that she would not yield
+to his wishes, and raising his voice, he exclaimed, "Then
+let the devil take you."
+
+Immediately the door opened, and a figure representing
+the Roman Catholic idea of his Satanic Majesty entered
+the room. He was very black, and covered with long hair,
+probably the skin of some wild animal. He had two long
+white tusks, two horns on his head, a large cloven foot,
+and a long tail that he drew after him on the floor. He
+looked so frightful, and recalled to my mind so vividly
+the figure that I saw at the White Nunnery, that I was
+very much frightened; still I did not believe it was
+really a supernatural being. I suspected that it was one
+of the priests dressed up in that way to frighten us,
+and I now know that such was the fact. But what of that?
+We all feared the priests quite as much as we should the
+Evil One himself, even if he should come to us in bodily
+shape, as they pretended he had done. Most of the nuns
+were very much frightened when they saw that figure walk
+up to the bedside, taking good care, however, to avoid
+the priest, he being so very holy it was impossible for
+an evil spirit to go near or even look at him.
+
+The priest then ordered us to return to the kitchen, for
+said he, "The devil has come for this nun's soul, and
+will take it with him," As we left the room I looked
+around on my companions and wondered if they believed
+this absurd story. I longed to ask them what they thought
+of it, but this was not allowed. All interchange of
+thought or feeling being strictly forbidden, we never
+ventured to speak without permission when so many of us
+were present, for some one was sure to tell of it if the
+least rule was broken.
+
+I was somewhat surprised at first that we were all sent
+to the kitchen, as but few of us were employed there;
+but we were soon called back again to look at the corpse.
+I was inexpressibly shocked at this summons, for I had
+not supposed it possible for her to die so soon. But she
+was dead; and that was all we could ever know about it.
+As we stood around the bed, the priest said she was an
+example of those in the world called heretics; that her
+soul was in misery, and would remain so forever; no masses
+or prayers could avail her then, for she could never be
+prayed out of hell. Sins like hers could never be forgiven.
+
+I continued to work in the kitchen as usual for many
+months after this occurrence, and for a few weeks the
+sick nun was there a great part of the time. Whenever we
+were alone, and sure that no one was near, we used to
+converse together, and a great comfort it was to us both.
+I felt that I had found in her one real friend, to
+sympathize with me in my grievous trials, and with whom
+I could sometimes hold communication without fear of
+betrayal. I had proved her, and found her faithful,
+therefore I did not fear to trust her. No one can imagine,
+unless they know by experience, how much pleasure we
+enjoyed in the few stolen moments that we spent together.
+
+I shall never forget the last conversation I had with
+her. She came and sat down where I was assisting another
+nun to finish a mat. She asked us if we knew what was
+going on in the house. "As I came from my room," said
+she, "I saw the priests and Superiors running along the
+halls, and they appeared so much excited, I thought
+something must be wrong. As they passed me, they told me
+to go to the kitchen, and stay there. What does it all
+mean?" Of course we did not know, for we had neither seen
+or heard anything unusual. "Well," said she, "they are
+all so much engaged up stairs, we can talk a little and
+not be overheard. I want to know something about the
+people in the world. Are they really cruel and cold-hearted,
+as the priests say they are? When you was in the world
+were they unkind to you?" "On the contrary," I replied,
+"I would gladly return to them again if I could get away
+from the convent. I should not be treated any worse, at
+all events, and I shall embrace the-first opportunity to
+go back to the world." "That is what I have always thought
+since I was old enough to think at all," said she, "and
+I have resolved a great many times to get away if possible.
+I suppose they tell us about the cruelty in the world
+just to frighten us, and. prevent us from trying to
+escape. I am so weak now I do not suppose I could walk
+out of Montreal even if I should leave the convent. But
+if I ever get strong enough, I shall certainly try to
+escape from this horrible place. O, I could tell you
+things about this convent that would curdle the blood in
+your veins."
+
+The other nun said that she had been once in the world,
+and every one was kind to her. "I shall try to get out
+again, some day," said she, "but we must keep our
+resolutions to ourselves, for there is no one here, that
+we can trust. Those whom we think our best friends will
+betray us, if we give them a chance. I do believe that
+some of them delight in getting us punished."
+
+The sick nun said, "I have never exposed any one and I
+never will. I have the secrets of a great many hid in my
+breast, that nothing shall ever extort from me." Here
+she was interrupted, and soon left the room. I never saw
+her again. Whether she was under punishment, or was so
+fortunate as to make her escape, I do not know. As no
+questions could be asked, it was very little we could
+know of each other. If one of our number escaped, the
+fact was carefully concealed from the rest, and if she
+was caught and brought back, no one ever knew it, except
+those who had charge of her. The other nun who worked
+in the room with me, watched me very closely. Having
+heard me declare my intention to leave the first
+opportunity, she determined to go with me if possible.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI.
+
+THE JOY OF FREEDOM.
+
+At length the long sought opportunity arrived, and with
+the most extatic joy we fled from the nunnery. The girl
+I have before mentioned, who wished to go with me, and
+another nun, with whom I had no acquaintance, were left
+in the kitchen to assist me, in taking charge of the
+cooking, while the rest of the people were at mass in
+the chapel. A chance presented for us to get away, and
+we all fled together, leaving the cooking to take care
+of itself. We were assisted to get out of the yard, but
+how, or by whom, I can never reveal. Death, in its most
+terrible form would be the punishment for such an act of
+kindness, and knowing this, it would be the basest
+ingratitude for me to name the individual who so kindly
+assisted us in our perilous undertaking.
+
+How well do I remember the emotions that thrilled my soul
+when I found myself safely outside the walls of that
+fearful prison! The joy of freedom--the hope of ultimate
+success--the fear of being overtaken, and dragged back
+to misery or death, were considerations sufficiently
+exciting to agitate our spirits, and lend fleetness to
+our steps. With trembling limbs, and throbbing hearts
+we fled towards the St. Lawrence river. Following the
+tow-path, we hastened on for a few miles, when one of
+the nuns became exhausted, and said she could go no
+further. She was very weak when we started, and the
+excitement and fatigue produced serious illness. What
+should we do with her? We could not take her along with
+us, and if we stopped with her, we might all be taken
+and carried back. Must we leave her by the way-side? It
+was a fearful alternative, but what else could we do?
+With sad hearts we took her to a shed near by, and there
+we left her to her fate, whatever it might be; perchance
+to die there alone, or what was still worse, be carried
+back to the convent. It was indeed, a sorrowful parting,
+and we wept bitter tears together, as we bade her a last
+farewell. I never saw or heard from her again.
+
+We pursued our way along the tow-path for a short distance,
+when the canal boat came along. We asked permission to
+go upon the boat, and the captain kindly granted it, but
+desired us to be very still. He carried us twelve miles,
+and then proposed to leave us, as he exposed himself to
+a heavy fine by carrying us without a pass, and unattended
+by a priest or Superior. We begged him to take us as far
+as he went with the boat, and frankly told him our
+situation. Having no money to offer, we could only cast
+ourselves on his mercy, and implore his pity and assistance.
+He consented to take us as far as the village of
+Beauharnois, and there he left us. He did not dare take
+us further, lest some one might be watching for us, and
+find us on his boat.
+
+It was five o'clock in the morning when we left the boat,
+but it was a Roman Catholic village, and we did not dare
+to stop. All that day we pursued our way without food or
+drink, and at night we were tired and hungry. Arriving
+at a small village, we ventured to stop at the most
+respectable looking house, and asked the woman if she
+could keep us over night. She looked at us very attentively
+and said she could not. We did not dare to call again,
+for we knew that we were surrounded by those who would
+think they were doing a good work to deliver us up to
+the priests. Darkness came over the earth, but still
+weary and sleepy as we were, we pursued our lonely way.
+I will not repeat our bitter reflections upon a cold
+hearted world, but the reader will readily imagine what
+they were.
+
+Late in the evening, we came to an old barn. I think it
+must have been four or five miles from the village. There
+was no house, or other building near it, and as no person
+was in sight, we ventured to enter. Here, to our great
+joy, we found a quantity of clean straw, with which we
+soon prepared a comfortable bed, where we could enjoy
+the luxury of repose. We slept quietly through the night,
+and at the early dawn awoke, refreshed and encouraged,
+but O, so hungry! Gladly would we have eaten anything in
+the shape of food, but nothing could we find.
+
+The morning star was yet shining brightly above us, as
+we again started on our journey. At length our hearts
+were cheered by the sight of a village. The first house
+we came to stood at some distance from the other buildings,
+and we saw two women in a yard milking cows. We called
+at the door, and asked the lady for some milk. "O yes,"
+said she, with a sweet smile, "come in, and rest awhile,
+and you shall have all you want." She thought we were
+Sisters of Charity, for they often go about visiting the
+sick, and praying with the people. It is considered a
+very meritorious act to render them assistance, and speed
+them on their way; but to help a runaway nun is to commit
+a crime of sufficient magnitude to draw down the anathema
+of the church. Therefore, while we carefully concealed
+our real character, we gratefully accepted the aid we so
+much needed, but which, we were sure, would have been
+withheld had she known to whom it was offered. After
+waiting till the cows were milked, and she had finished
+her own breakfast, she filled a large earthen pan with
+bread and milk, gave each of us a spoon, and we ate as
+much as we wished. As we arose to depart, she gave each
+of us a large piece of bread to carry with us, and asked
+us to pray with her. We accordingly knelt in prayer;
+implored heaven's blessing on her household, and then
+took our leave of this kind lady, never more to meet her
+on earth; but she will never be forgotten.
+
+That day we traveled a long distance, at least, so it
+seemed to us. When nearly overcome with fatigue, we saw
+from the tow-path an island in the river, and upon it a
+small house. Near the shore a man stood beside a canoe.
+We made signs to him to come to us, and he immediately
+sprang into his canoe and came over. We asked him to take
+us to the island, and he cheerfully granted our request,
+but said we must sit very still, or we would find ourselves
+in the water. I did not wonder he thought so, for the
+canoe was very small, and the weight of three persons
+sank it almost even with the surface of the river, while
+the least motion would cause it to roll from side to
+side, so that we really felt that we were in danger of
+a very uncomfortable bath if nothing worse.
+
+We landed safely, however, and were kindly welcomed by
+the Indian family in the house. Six squaws were sitting
+on the floor, some of them smoking, others making shoes
+and baskets. They were very gayly dressed, their skirts
+handsomely embroidered with beads and silk of various
+colors. One of the girls seemed very intelligent, and
+conversed fluently in the English language which she
+spoke correctly. But she did not look at all like an
+Indian, having red hair and a lighter skin than the
+others. She was the only one in the family that I could
+converse with, as the rest of them spoke only their native
+dialect; but the nun who was with me could speak both
+French and Indian.
+
+They treated us with great kindness, gave us food, and
+invited in to stay and live with them; said we could be
+very happy there, and to induce us to remain, they informed
+us that the village we saw on the other side of the river,
+called St. Regis, was inhabited by Indians, but they were
+all Roman Catholics. They had a priest, and a church
+where we could go to Mass every Sabbath. Little did they
+imagine that we were fleeing for life from the Romish
+priests; that so far from being an inducement to remain
+with them, this information was the very thing to send
+us on our way with all possible speed. We did not dare
+to stay, for I knew full well that if any one who had
+seen us went to confession, they would be obliged to give
+information of our movements; and if one priest heard of
+us, he would immediately telegraph to all the priests in
+the United States and Canada, and we should be watched
+on every side. Escape would then be nearly impossible,
+therefore we gently, but firmly refused to accept the
+hospitality of these good people, and hastened to bid
+them farewell.
+
+I asked the girl how far it was to the United States.
+She said it was two miles to Hogansburg, and that was in
+the States. We then asked the man to take us in his canoe
+to the village of St. Regis on the other side of the
+river. He consented, but, I thought, with some reluctance,
+and before he allowed us to land, he conversed some
+minutes with the Indians who met him on the shore. We
+could not hear what they said, but my fears were at once
+awakened. I thought they suspected us, and if so, we were
+lost. But the man came back at length, and, assisted us
+from the boat. If he had any suspicions he kept them to
+himself.
+
+Soon after we reached the shore I met a man, of whom I
+enquired when a boat would start for Hogansburg. He gazed
+at us a moment, and then pointed to five boats out in
+the river, and said those were the last to go that day.
+They were then ready to start, and waited only for the
+tow-boat to take them along. But they were so far away
+we could not get to them, even if we dared risk ourselves
+among so many passengers. What could we do? To stay there
+over night, was not to be thought of for a moment. We
+were sure to be taken, and carried back, if we ventured
+to try it. Yet there was but one alternative; either
+remain there till the next day, or try to get a passage
+on the tow-boat. It did not take me a long time to decide
+for myself, and I told the nun that I should go on, if
+the captain would take me! "What! go on the tow-boat!"
+she exclaimed, "There are no ladies on that boat, and
+I do not like to go with so many men." "I am not afraid
+of the men," I replied, "if they are not Romanists, and
+I am resolved to go." "Do not leave me," she cried, with
+streaming tears. "I am sure we can get along better if
+we keep together, but I dare not go on the boat." "And
+I dare not stay here," said I, and so we parted. I to
+pursue my solitary way, she to go, I know not whither.
+I gave her the parting hand, and have never heard from
+her since, but I hope she succeeded better than I did,
+in her efforts to escape.
+
+I went directly to the captain of the boat and asked him
+if he could carry me to the States. He said he should go
+as far as Ogdensburg, and would carry me there, if I
+wished; or he could set me off at some place where he
+stopped for wood and water. When I told him I had no
+money to pay him, he smiled, and asked if I was a
+run-a-way. I frankly confessed that I was, for I thought
+it was better for me to tell the truth than to try to
+deceive. "Well," said the captain, "I will not betray
+you; but you had better go to my state-room and stay
+there." I thanked him, but said I would rather stay where
+I was. He then gave me the key to his room, and advised
+me to go in and lock the door, "for," said he, "we are
+not accustomed to have ladies in this boat, and the men
+may annoy you. You will find it more pleasant and
+comfortable to stay there alone." Truly grateful for his
+kindness, and happy to escape from the gaze of the men,
+I followed his direction; nor did I leave the room again
+until I left the boat. The captain brought me my meals,
+but did not attempt to enter the room. There was a small
+window with a spring on the inside; he would come and
+tap on the window, and ask me to raise it, when he would
+hand me a waiter on which he had placed a variety of
+refreshments, and immediately retire.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII.
+
+STRANGER IN A STRANGE LAND.
+
+That night and the next day I suffered all the horrors
+of sea-sickness; and those who have known by experience
+how completely it prostrates the energies of mind and
+body, can imagine how I felt on leaving the boat at night.
+The kind-hearted captain set me on shore at a place where
+he left coal and lumber, a short distance from the village
+of Ogdensburg. He gave me twelve and half cents, and
+expressed regret that he could do no more for me. He said
+he could not direct me to a lodging for the night, being
+a stranger in the place, and this the first time he had
+been on that route. Should this narrative chance to meet
+his eye, let him know that his kind and delicate attentions
+to a stranger in distress, are and ever will be remembered
+with the gratitude they so richly merit. It was with
+evident reluctance that he left me to make my way onward
+as I could.
+
+And now, reader, imagine, if you can, my situation. A
+stranger in a strange land, and comparatively a stranger
+to the whole world--alone in the darkness of night, not
+knowing where to seek a shelter or a place to lay my
+head; exhausted with sea-sickness until I felt more dead
+than alive, it did seem as though it would be a luxury
+to lie down and die. My stockings and shoes were all worn
+out with so much walking, my feet sore, swollen, and
+bleeding, and my limbs so stiff and lame that it was only
+by the greatest effort that I could step at all. So
+extreme were my sufferings, that I stopped more than once
+before I reached the village, cast myself upon the cold
+ground, and thought I could go no further. Not even the
+idea of being run over in the darkness by some passing
+traveller, had power to keep me on my feet. Then I would
+rest awhile, and resolve to try again; and so I hobbled
+onward. It seemed an age of misery before I came to any
+house; but at length my spirits revived at the sight of
+brilliant lights through the windows, and the sound of
+cheerful voices that fell upon my ear.
+
+And now I thought my troubles over for that night at
+least. But no, when I asked permission to stay over night,
+it was coldly refused. Again and again I called at houses
+where the people seemed to enjoy all the comforts and
+even the luxuries of life; but their comforts were for
+themselves and not for a toil-worn traveller like me.
+This I was made to understand in no gentle manner; and
+some of those I called upon were not very particular in
+the choice of language.
+
+By this time my feet were dreadfully swollen, and O! so
+sore and stiff, that every step produced the most intense
+agony. Is it strange that I felt as though life was hardly
+worth preserving? I resolved to call at one house more,
+and if again refused, to lie down by the wayside and die.
+I accordingly entered the village hotel and asked for
+the landlady. The bar-tender gave me a suspicious glance
+that made me tremble, and asked my business. I told him
+my business was with the landlady and no other person.
+He left the room a moment, and then conducted me to her
+chamber.
+
+As I entered a lady came forward to meet me, and the
+pleasant expression of her countenance at once won my
+confidence. She gave me a cordial welcome, saying, with
+a smile, as she led me to a seat, "I guess, my dear, you
+are a run-a-way, are you not?" I confessed that it was
+even so; that I had fled from priestly cruelty, had
+travelled as far as I could, and now, weary, sick, and
+faint from long fasting, I had ventured to cast myself
+upon her mercy. "Will you protect me?" I asked, "and are
+you a Roman Catholic?" "No," she replied, "I am not a
+Roman Catholic, and I will protect you. You seem to have
+suffered much, and are quite exhausted. But you will find
+a friend in me. I will not betray you, for I dislike the
+priests and the convents as much as you do."
+
+She then called her little girl, and ordered a fire
+kindled in another chamber, saying she did not wish her
+servants to see me. The child soon returned, when the
+lady herself conducted me to a large, pleasant bed-room,
+handsomely furnished with every convenience, and a fire
+in the grate. She gave me a seat in a large easy-chair
+before the fire, and went out, locking the door after
+her. In a short time she returned with warm water for a
+bath, and with her own hands gave me all the assistance
+needed. As I related the incidents of the day, she
+expressed much sympathy for my sufferings, and said she
+was glad I had come to her. She gave, me a cordial, and
+then brought me a cup of tea and other refreshments, of
+which I made a hearty supper. She would not allow me to
+eat all I wished; but when I had taken as much as was
+good for me, she bathed my feet with a healing wash, and
+assisted me to bed. O, the luxury of that soft and
+comfortable bed! No one can realize with what a keen
+sense of enjoyment I laid my head upon those downy pillows,
+unless they have suffered as I did, and known by experience
+the sweetness of repose after excessive toil.
+
+All that night this good lady sat beside my bed, and kept
+my feet wet in order to reduce the swelling. I was little
+inclined to sleep, and at her request related some of
+the events of my convent life. While doing this, I hardly
+knew what to make of this curious woman. Sometimes she
+would weep, and then she would swear like any pirate. I
+was surprised and somewhat afraid of her, she seemed so
+strange and used such peculiar language. She understood
+my feelings at once, and immediately said, "You need not
+be afraid of me, for I have a kind heart, if I do use
+wicked words. I cannot help swearing when I think about
+the priests, monsters of iniquity that they are; what
+fearful crimes they do commit under the cloak of religion!
+O, if the people of this land could but see their real
+character, they would rise en masse and drive them from
+the country, whose liberties they will, if possible,
+destroy. For myself I have good cause to hate them. Shall
+I tell you my story, dear?" I begged her to do so, which
+she did, as follows:
+
+"I once had a sister, young, talented, beautiful, amiable
+and affectionate. She was the pride of all our family,
+the idol of our souls. She wished for an education, and
+we gladly granted her request. In our zeal to serve her,
+we resolved to give her the very best advantages, and so
+we sent her to a Romish school. It was a seminary for
+young ladies taught by nuns, and was the most popular
+one in that part of the country. My father, like many
+other parents who knew such establishments only by report,
+had not the least idea of its true character. But deluded
+by the supposed sanctity of the place, he was happy in
+the thought that he had left his darling where it was
+said that 'science and religion go hand in hand.' For a
+season, all went on well. She wrote to us that she was
+pleased with the school, and wished to remain. We thought
+her hand writing wonderfully improved, and eagerly looked
+forward to the time when she would return to us a finished
+scholar, as well as an accomplished lady. But those
+pleasant prospects were soon overcast. Too soon, our
+happy, bounding hearts were hushed by unspeakable grief,
+and our brilliant anticipations were dissipated in the
+chamber of death. In their place came those solemn
+realities, the shroud, the coffin, the hearse and the
+tomb."
+
+"Did she die?" I asked. "Yes," replied the lady, as she
+wiped away the fast flowing tears; "Yes, she died. I
+believe she was poisoned, but we could do nothing; we
+had no proof. She had been long at school before we
+suspected the deception that was practised upon us. But
+at length I went with my other sister to see her, and
+the Superior informed us that she was ill, and could not
+see us. We proposed going to her room, but to our great
+surprise were assured that such a thing could not be
+allowed. We left with sad hearts, and soon called again.
+I cannot describe my feelings when we were coldly informed
+that she did not wish to see us. What could it mean?
+Surely something must be wrong; and we left with terrible
+presentiments of coming evil. It came. Yes, too soon were
+our worst fears realized. I called one day resolved to
+see her before I left the house. Conceive, if you can,
+my surprise and horror, when they told me that my beautiful,
+idolized sister had resolved to become a nun. That she
+had already renounced the world, and would hold no further
+communication with her relatives. "Why did I not know
+this before? I exclaimed." "You know it now," was the
+cold reply. I did not believe a word of it, and when I
+told my father what they said, he went to them, and
+resolutely demanded his child. At first they refused to
+give her up, but when they saw that his high spirit was
+aroused--that he would not be flattered or deceived, they
+reluctantly yielded to his demand."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII.
+
+LANDLADY'S STORY CONTINUED.
+
+The poor girl was overjoyed to meet her friends again,
+but how great was our astonishment and indignation when
+she informed us that she had never received a single line
+from home after she entered the school, nor did she ever
+know that we had called to see her until we informed her
+of the fact. Whenever she expressed surprise that she
+did not hear from us, they told her that we had probably
+forgotten her, and strove to awaken in her mind feelings
+of indignation, suspicion and animosity. Not succeeding
+in this, however, they informed her that her father had
+called, and expressed a wish that she should become a
+nun; that he did not think it best for her to return home
+again, nor did he even ask for a parting interview.
+
+Confounded and utterly heart-broken, she would have given
+herself up to uncontrollable grief had she been allowed
+to indulge her feelings. But even the luxury of tears
+was forbidden, and she was compelled to assume an appearance
+of cheerfulness, and to smile when her heart-strings were
+breaking. We brought forward the letters we had received
+from time to time which we believed she had written. She
+had never seen them, before, "and this," said she, "is
+not my hand-writing." Of this fact she soon convinced
+us, but she said she had written letter after letter
+hoping for an answer, but no answer came. She said she
+knew that the Superior examined all the letters written
+by the young ladies, but supposed they were always sent,
+after being read. But it was now plain to be seen that
+those letters were destroyed, and others substituted in
+their place.
+
+[Footnote: Raffaele Ciocci, formerly a Benedictine Monk,
+in his "Narrative," published by the American and Foreign
+Christian Union, relates a similar experience of his own,
+when in the Papal College of San Bernardo.
+
+Being urged to sign "a deed of humility," in which he
+was to renounce all his property and give it to the
+college, he says, "I knew not what to think of this "deed
+of humility." A thousand misgivings filled my mind, and
+hoping to receive from the notary an explanation that
+would assist me in fully comprehending its intention, I
+anxiously said, "I must request, sir, that you will inform
+me what is expected from me. Tell me what is this deed--
+whether it be really a mere form, as has been represented
+to me, or if"--Here the master arose, and in an imperious
+tone interrupted me, saying,--"Do not be obstinate and
+rebellions, but obey. I have already told you that when
+you assume the habit of the Order, the chapter 'de
+humititate' shall be explained to you. In this paper
+you have only to make a renunciation of all you possess
+on earth."
+
+"Of all I possess! And if I renounce all, who, when I
+leave the college, will provide for me?" The notary now
+interposed. "That," said he, "is the point to which I
+wish to call your attention, in advising you to make some
+reservation. If you neglect to do so, you may find yourself
+in difficulties, losing, as you irrevocably will, every
+right of your own." At these words, so palpable, so
+glaring, the bandage fell from my eyes, and I saw the
+abyss these monsters were opening under my feet. "This
+is a deception, a horrible deception," I exclaimed. "I
+now understand the 'deed of humility,' but I protest I
+will not sign it, I will have nothing more to do with
+it." * * * After spending two or three hours in bitterness
+and woe, I resolved to have recourse to my family. For
+this purpose I wrote a long letter to my mother, in which
+I exposed all the miseries of my heart, related what had
+taken place with regard to the "deed of humility," and
+begged of her consolation and advice. I gave the letter
+into the hands of a servant, and on the following morning
+received a reply, in which I was told, in gentle, terms,
+to be tranquil,--not to resist the wishes of my directors,
+--sign unhesitatingly any paper that might be required,
+for, when my studies were completed, and I quitted the
+college, the validity of these forms would cease. This
+letter set all my doubts at rest, and restored peace to
+my mind. It was written by my mother, and she, I felt
+assured, would never deceive me. How could I for one
+moment imagine that this epistle was an invention of my
+enemies, who imitated the hand-writing and affectionate
+style of my mother? Some persons will say, you might have
+suspected it. * * * I reply, that in the uprightness of
+my heart, I could not conceive such atrocious wickedness;
+it appeared utterly irreconcilable with the sanctity of
+the place, and with the venerable hoariness of persons
+dedicated to God.
+
+After perusing the letter, I hastened to the master,
+declaring my readiness to sign the "deed of humility."
+He smiled approvingly on finding how well his plan had
+succeeded. The notary and witnesses were again summoned,
+and my condemnation written. The good notary, however,
+pitying my situation, inserted an exceptional clause to
+the total relinquishment of my rights. * * * No sooner
+was this business concluded, than the master commanded
+me to write to my parents, to inform them that I had
+signed the deed of renunciation, and was willing, for
+the benefit of my soul, to assume the monkish habit. He
+was present when I wrote this letter; I was, therefore,
+obliged to adopt the phrases suggested by him,--phrases,
+breathing zeal and devotion; full of indifference to the
+world, and tranquil satisfaction at the choice I had
+made. My parents, thought I, will be astonished when they
+read this epistle, but they must perceive that the language
+is not mine, so little is it in accordance with my former
+style of writing.
+
+Reader, in the course of thirteen months, only one, of
+from fifty to sixty letters which I addressed to my
+mother, was ever received by her, and that one was this
+very letter. The monks, instead of forwarding mine, had
+forged letters imitating the hand-writing, and adopting
+a style suited to their purpose; and instead of consigning
+to me the genuine replies, they artfully substituted
+answers of their own fabrication. My family, therefore,
+were not surprised at the tenor of this epistle, but
+rejoiced over it, and reputed me already a Saint. They
+probably pictured me to themselves, on some future day,
+with a mitre on my head--with the red cap--nay, perhaps,
+even wearing the triple crown. Oh, what a delusion! Poor
+deceived parents! You knew not that your son, in anguish
+and despair, was clashing his chains, and devouring his
+tears in secret; that a triple bandage was placed before
+his eyes, and that he was being dragged, an unwilling
+victim, to the sacrifice." Returning home soon after,
+Ciocci rushed to his mother, and asked if she had his
+letters. They, were produced; when he found that only
+one had been written by him. The rest were forgeries of
+the masters.]
+
+"It follows then," said my father, "that these letters
+are forgeries, and the excuses they have so often made
+are base falsehoods. A teacher of the religion of Jesus
+Christ guilty of lying and forgery! 'O, my soul come
+not thou into their secret; unto their assembly mine
+honor be thou not united.'"
+
+"But we have our darling home again," said I, "and now
+we shall keep her with us." Never shall I forget the
+sweet, sad smile that came over her pale face as I uttered
+these words. Perchance, even then she realized that she
+was soon to leave us, never more to return. However this
+may be, she gradually declined. Slowly, but surely she
+went down to the grave. Every remedy was tried--every
+measure resorted to, that seemed to promise relief, but
+all in vain. We had the best physicians, but they frankly
+confessed that they did not understand her disease. In
+a very few months after her return, we laid our lovely
+and beloved sister beneath the clods of the valley. Our
+good old physician wept as he gazed upon her cold remains.
+I believe he thought she was poisoned, but as he could
+not prove it, he would only have injured himself by saying
+so. As for myself, I always thought that she knew too
+many of their secrets to be allowed to live after leaving
+them. "And now, dear," she continued, "do you think it
+strange that I hate the Romanists? Do you wonder if I
+feel like swearing when I think of priests and convents?"
+
+Truly, I did not wonder that she hated them, though I
+could not understand what benefit it could be to swear
+about it; but I did not doubt the truth of her story.
+How often, in the convent from which I fled, had I heard
+them exult over the success of some deep laid scheme to
+entrap the ignorant, the innocent and the unwary! If a
+girl was rich or handsome, as sure as she entered their
+school, so sure was she to become a nun, unless she had
+influential friends to look after her and resolutely
+prevent it. To effect this, no means were left untried.
+The grossest hypocricy, and the meanest deception were
+practised to prevent a girl from holding communication
+with any one out of the convent No matter how lonely, or
+how homesick she might feel, she was not allowed to see
+her friends, or even to be informed of their kind
+attentions. So far from this, she was made to believe,
+if possible, that her relatives had quite forsaken her,
+while these very relatives were boldly informed that she
+did not wish to see them. If they wrote to their friends,
+as they sometimes did, their letters were always destroyed,
+while those received at home were invariably written by
+the priest or Superior. These remarks, however, refer
+only to those who are rich, or beautiful in person. Many
+a girl can say with truth that she has attended the
+convent school, and no effort was ever made--no inducement
+ever presented to persuade her to become a nun.
+Consequently, she says that stories like the above are
+mere falsehoods, reported to injure the school. This may
+be true so far as she is concerned, but you may be sure
+she has neither riches nor beauty, or if possessed of
+these, there was some other strong reason why she should
+be an exception to the general rule. Could she know the
+private history of some of her school-mates, she would
+tell a different story.
+
+I remember that while in the convent, I was one day sent
+up stairs to assist a Superior in a chamber remote from
+the kitchen, and in a part of the house where I had never
+been before. Returning alone to the kitchen, I passed a
+door that was partly open, and hearing a slight groan
+within, I pushed open the door and looked in, before I
+thought what I was doing. A young girl lay upon a bed,
+who looked more like a corpse than a living person. She
+saw me, and motioned to have me come to her.
+
+As I drew near the bed, she burst into tears, and whispered,
+"Can't you get me a drink of cold water?" I told her I
+did not know, but I would try. I hastened to the kitchen,
+and as no one was present but a nun whom I did not fear,
+I procured a pitcher of water, and went back with it
+without meeting any one on the way. I was well aware that
+if seen, I should be punished, but I did not care. I was
+doing as I would wish others to do to me, and truly, I
+had my reward. Never shall I forget how grateful that
+poor sufferer was for a draught of cold water. She could
+not tell how many days she had been fasting, for some of
+the time she had been insensible; but it must have been
+several days, and she did not know how long she was to
+remain in that condition.
+
+"How came you here?" I asked, in a whisper; "and what
+have you done to induce them to punish you so?" "O," said
+she, with a burst of tears, and grasping my hand with
+her pale, cold fingers, "I was in the school, and I
+thought it would be so nice to be a nun! Then my father
+died and left me all his property, and they persuaded me
+to stay here, and give it all to the church. I was so
+sad then I did not care for money, and I had no idea what
+a place it is. I really thought that the nuns were pure
+and holy--that their lives were devoted to heaven, their
+efforts consecrated to the cause of truth and righteousness.
+I thought that this was indeed the 'house of God,' the
+very 'gate of heaven.' But as soon as they were sure of
+me, they let me know--but you understand me; you know
+what I mean?" I nodded assent, and once more asked, "What
+did you do?" "O, I was in the school," said she, "and I
+knew that a friend of mine was coming here just as I did;
+and I could not bear to see her, in all her loveliness
+and unsuspecting innocence, become a victim to these vile
+priests. I found an opportunity to let her know what a
+hell she was coming to. 'Twas an unpardonable sin, you
+see. I had robbed the church--committed sacrilege, they
+said--and they have almost killed me for it. I wish they
+would QUITE, for I am sure death has no terrors for me
+now. God will never punish me for what I have done. But
+go; don't stay any longer; they'll kill you if they catch
+you here." I knew that she had spoken truly--they WOULD
+kill me, almost, if not quite, if they found me there;
+but I must know a little more. "Did you save your friend?"
+I asked, "or did you both have to suffer, to pay for your
+generous act?" "Did I save her? Yes, thank God, I did.
+She did not come, and she promised not to tell of me. I
+don't think she did; but they managed to find it out, I
+don't know how; and now--O God, let me die!" I was obliged
+to go, and I left her, with a promise to carry her some
+bread if I could. But I could not, and I never saw her
+again. Yet what a history her few words unfolded! It was
+so much like the landlady's story, I could not forbear
+relating it to her. She seemed much interested in all my
+convent adventures; and in this way we spent the night.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV.
+
+THE TWO SISTERS.
+
+Next morning the lady informed me that I could not remain
+with her in safety, but she had a sister, who lived about
+half a mile distant, with whom I could stop until my feet
+were sufficiently healed to enable me to resume my journey.
+She then sent for her sister, who very kindly, as I then
+thought, acceded to her request, and said I was welcome
+to stay with her as long as I wished. Arrangements were
+therefore made at once for my removal. My kind hostess
+brought two large buffalo robes into my chamber, which
+she wrapped around my person in such a way as to shield
+me from the observation of the servants. She then called
+one whom she could trust, and bade him take up the bundle
+and carry it down to a large covered wagon that stood at
+the door. I have often wondered whether the man knew what
+was in that bundle or not. I do not think he did, for he
+threw me across his shoulder as he would any bale of
+merchandise, and laid me on the bottom of the carriage.
+The two ladies then entered, laughing heartily at the
+success of their ruse, and joking me about my novel mode
+of conveyance. In this manner we were driven to the
+sister's residence, and I was carried into the house by
+the servants, in the same way. The landlady stopped for
+a few moments, and when she left she gave me cloth for
+a new dress, a few other articles of clothing, and three
+dollars in money. She bade me stay there and make my
+dress, and on no account venture out again in my nun
+dress. She wished me success in my efforts to escape,
+commended me to the care of our heavenly Father, and bade
+me farewell. She returned in the wagon alone, and left
+me to make the acquaintance of my new hostess.
+
+This lady was a very different woman from her sister,
+and I soon had reason to regret that I was in her power.
+It has been suggested to me that the two ladies acted in
+concert; that I was removed for the sole purpose of being
+betrayed into the hands of my enemies. But I am not
+willing to believe this. Dark as human nature appears to
+me--accustomed as I am to regard almost every one with
+suspicion--still I cannot for one moment cherish a thought
+so injurious to one who was so kind to me. Is it possible
+that she could be such a hypocrite? Treat me with so much
+tenderness, and I might say affection, and then give me
+up to what was worse than death? No; whatever the reader
+may think about it, I can never believe her guilty of
+such perfidy. I regret exceedingly my inability to give
+the name of this lady in connection with the history of
+her good deeds, but I did not learn the name of either
+sister. The one to whom I was now indebted for a shelter
+seemed altogether careless of my interests. I had been
+with her but a few hours when she asked me to do some
+washing for her. Of course I was glad to do it; but when
+she requested me to go into the yard and hang the clothes
+upon the line, I became somewhat alarmed. I did not like
+to do it, and told her so; but she laughed at my fears,
+overruled all my objections, said no one in that place
+would seek to harm or to betray me, and assured me there
+was not the least danger. I at last consented to go,
+though my reason, judgment, and inclination, had I followed
+their dictates, would have kept me in the house. But I
+did not like to appear ungrateful, or unwilling to repay
+the kindness I received, as far as I was able; still I
+could not help feeling that it was an ungenerous demand.
+She might at least have offered me a bonnet or a shawl,
+as a partial disguise; but she did nothing of the kind.
+
+When I saw that I could not avoid the exposure I resolved
+to make the best of it and get through as quickly, as
+possible; but my dress attracted a good deal of attention,
+and I saw more than one suspicious glance directed towards
+me before my task was finished. When it was over I thought
+no more about it, but gave myself up to the bright
+anticipations of future happiness, which now began to
+take possession of my mind.
+
+That night I retired to a comfortable bed, and was soon
+lost to all earthly cares in the glorious land of dreams.
+What unalloyed happiness I enjoyed that night! what
+impossible feats I performed! Truly, the vision was
+bright, but a sad awaking followed. Some time in the
+night I was aroused by the flashing of a bright light
+from a dark lantern suddenly opened. I attempted to rise,
+but before I could realize where I was, a strong hand
+seized me and a gag was thrust into my mouth. The man
+attempted to take me in his arms, but with my hands and
+feet I defended myself to the best of my ability. Another
+man now came to his assistance, and with strong cords
+confined my hands and feet, so that I was entirely at
+their mercy. Perfectly helpless, I could neither resist
+nor call for help. They then took me up and carried me
+down stairs, with no clothing but my night-dress, not
+even a shawl to shield me from the cold night air.
+
+At the gate stood a long covered wagon, in form like a
+butchers cart, drawn by two horses, and beside it a long
+box with several men standing around it. I had only time
+to observe this, when they thrust me into the box, closed
+the lid, placed it in the wagon, and drove rapidly away.
+I could not doubt for a moment into whose hands I had
+fallen, and when they put me into the box, I wished I
+might suffocate, and thus end my misery at once. But
+they had taken good care to prevent this by boring holes
+in the box, which admitted air enough to keep up
+respiration. And this was the result of all my efforts
+for freedom! After all I had suffered in making my escape,
+it was a terrible disappointment to be thus cruelly
+betrayed, gagged, bound, and boxed up like an article of
+merchandise, carried back to certain torture, and perchance
+to death. O, blame me not, gentle reader, if in my haste,
+and the bitter disappointment and anguish of my spirit,
+I questioned the justice of the power that rules the
+world. Nor let your virtuous indignation wax hot against
+me if I confess to you, that I even doubted the existence
+of that power. How often had I cried to God for help!
+Why were my prayers and tears disregarded? What had I
+done to deserve such a fife of misery? These, and similar
+thoughts occupied my mind during that lonely midnight
+ride.
+
+We arrived at St. Regis before the first Mass in the
+morning. The box was then taken into the chapel, where
+they took me out and carried me into the church. I was
+seated at the foot of the altar, with my hands and feet
+fast bound, the gag still in my mouth, and no clothing
+on, but my night-dress. Two men stood beside me, and I
+remained here until the priest had said mass and the
+people retired from the church. He then came down from
+the altar, and said to the men beside me, "Well, you have
+got her." "Yes Sir," they replied, "what shall we do with
+her?" "Put her on the five o'clock boat," said he, "and
+let the other men go with her to Montreal. I want you to
+stay here, and be ready to go the other way tonight" This
+priest was an Indian, but he spoke the English language
+correctly and fluently. He seemed to feel some pity for
+my forlorn condition, and as they were about to carry me
+away he brought a large shawl, and wrapped it around me,
+for which I was truly grateful.
+
+At the appointed time, I was taken on board the boat,
+watched very closely by the two men who had me in charge.
+There was need enough of this, for I would very gladly
+have thrown myself into the water, had I not been prevented.
+Once and again I attempted it, but the men held me back.
+For this, I am now thankful, but at that time my life
+appeared of so little importance, and the punishments I
+knew were in reserve for me seemed so fearful, I voluntarily
+chose "strangling and death rather than life." The captain
+and sailors were all Romanists, and seemed to vie with
+each other in making me as unhappy as possible They made
+sport of my "new fashioned clothing," and asked if I "did
+not wish to run away again?" When they found I did not
+notice them they used the most abusive and scurrilous
+language, mingled with vulgar and profane expressions,
+which may not be repeated. The men who had charge of me,
+and who should have protected me from such abuse, so far
+from doing it, joined in the laugh, and appeared to think
+it a pleasant amusement to ridicule and vex a poor helpless
+fugitive. May God forgive them for their cruelty, and in
+the hour of their greatest need, may they meet with the
+kindness they refused to me.
+
+At Lachine we changed boats and took another to Montreal.
+When we arrived there, three priests were waiting for
+us. Their names I perfectly remember, but I am not sure
+that I can spell them correctly. Having never learned
+while in the nunnery, to read, or spell anything except
+a simple prayer, it is not strange if I do make mistakes,
+when attempting to give names from memory. I can only
+give them as they were pronounced. They were called
+Father Kelly, Dow, and Conroy. All the priests were
+called father, of whatever age they might be.
+
+As we proceeded from the boat to the Nunnery, one of the
+priests went before us while the others walked beside
+me, leading me between them. People gazed at us as we
+passed, but they did not dare to insult, or laugh at me,
+while in such respectable company. Yet, methinks it must
+have been a ludicrous sight to witness so much parade
+for a poor run-a-way nun.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XV.
+
+CHOICE OF PUNISHMENTS.
+
+On our arrival at the Nunnery, I was left alone for half
+an hour. Then the Bishop came in with the Lady Superior,
+and the Abbess who had charge of the kitchen when I left.
+The Bishop read to me three punishments of which he said,
+I could take my choice. First.--To fast five days in the
+fasting room. Second.--To suffer punishment in the lime
+room. Third.--To fast four days, in the cell. As I knew
+nothing of these places except the cell, a priest was
+directed to take me to them, that I might see for myself,
+and then take my choice. At first, I thought I did not
+care, and I said I had no choice about it; but when I
+came to see the rooms, I was thankful that I was not
+allowed to abide by that decision. Certainly, I had no
+idea what was before me.
+
+I was blindfolded, and taken to the lime room first. I
+think it must have been situated at a great distance from
+the room we left, for he led me down several flights of
+stairs, and through long, low passages, where it was
+impossible to stand erect. At length we entered a room
+where the atmosphere seemed laden with hot vapor. My
+blinder was removed, and I found myself in a pleasant
+room some fifteen feet square. There was no furniture of
+any kind, but a wide bench, fastened to the wall, extended
+round three sides of the room. The floor looked like one
+solid block of dark colored marble; not a crack or seam
+to be seen in it, but it was clouded, highly polished,
+and very beautiful. Around the sides of the room, a
+great number of hooks and chains were fastened to the
+wall, and a large hook hung in the center overhead. Near
+the door stood two men, with long iron bars, some two
+inches square, on their shoulders.
+
+The priest directed me to stand upon the bench, and
+turning to the men, he bade them raise the door. They
+put down their bars, and I suppose touched a concealed
+spring, for the whole floor at once flew up, and fastened
+to the large hook over head. Surprised and terrified, I
+stood wondering what was to come next. At my feet yawned
+a deep pit, from which, arose a suffocating vapor, so
+hot, it almost scorched my face and nearly stopped my
+breath. The priest pointed to the heaving, tumbling
+billows of smoke that were rolling below, and; asked,
+"How would you like to be thrown into the lime?" "Not at
+all," I gasped, in a voice scarcely audible, "it would
+burn me to death." I suppose he thought I was sufficiently
+frightened, for he bade his men close the door. This
+they did by slowly letting down the floor, and I could
+see that it was in some way supported by the chains
+attached to the walls but in what manner I do not know.
+
+I was nearly suffocated by the lime smoke that filled
+the room, and though I knew not what was in reserve for
+me, I was glad when my blinder was put on, and I was led
+away. I think we returned the same way we came, and
+entered another room where the scent was so very offensive,
+that I begged to be taken out immediately. Even before
+my eyes were uncovered, and I knew nothing of the loathsome
+objects by which we were surrounded, I felt that I could
+not endure to breathe an atmosphere so deadly. But the
+sight that met my eyes when my blinder was removed, I
+cannot describe, nor the sensations with which I gazed
+upon it. I can only give the reader some faint idea of
+the place, which, they said, was called the fasting room,
+and here incorrigible offenders fasted until they starved
+to death. Nor was this all. Their dead bodies were not
+even allowed a decent burial, but were suffered to remain
+in the place where they died, until the work of death
+was complete and dust returned to dust. Thus the atmosphere
+became a deadly poison to the next poor victim who was
+left to breathe the noxious effluvia of corruption and
+decay. I am well aware that my reader will hardly credit
+my statements, but I do solemnly affirm that I relate
+nothing but the truth. In this room were placed several
+large iron kettles, so deep that a person could sit in
+them, and many of them contained the remains of human
+beings. In one the corpse looked as though it had been
+dead but a short time. Others still sat erect in the
+kettle, but the flesh was dropping from the bones. Every
+stage of decay was here represented, from the commencement,
+till nothing but a pile of bones was left of the poor
+sufferer.
+
+Conceive, if you can, with what feelings I gazed upon
+these disgusting relics of the dead. Even now, my blood
+chills in my veins, as memory recalls the fearful sight,
+or as, in sleep, I live over again the dread realities
+of that hour. Was I to meet a fate like this? I might,
+perchance, escape it for that time, but what assurance
+had I that I was not ultimately destined to such an end?
+These thoughts filled my mind, as I followed the priest
+from the room; and for a long time I continued to speculate
+upon what I had seen. They called it the fasting room;
+but if fasting were the only object, why were they placed
+in those kettles, instead of being allowed to sit on
+chairs or benches, or even on the floor? And why placed
+in IRON kettles? Why were they not made of wood? It would
+have answered the purpose quite as well, if fasting or
+starvation were the only objects in view. Then came the
+fearful suggestion, were these kettles ever heated? And
+was that floor made of stone or iron? The thought was
+too shocking to be cherished for a moment; but I could
+not drive it from my mind.
+
+I was again blindfolded, and taken to a place they called
+a cell. But it was quite different from the one I was in
+before. We descended several steps as we entered it, and
+instead of the darkness I anticipated, I found myself in
+a large room with sufficient light to enable me to see
+every object distinctly. One end of a long chain was
+fastened around my waist, and the other firmly secured
+to an iron ring in the floor; but the chain, though large
+and heavy, was long enough to allow me to go all over
+the room. I could not see how it was lighted, but it must
+have been in some artificial manner, for it was quite as
+light at night, as in the day. Here were instruments of
+various kinds, the use of which, I did not understand;
+some of them lying on the floor, others attached to the
+sides of the room. One of them was made in the form of
+a large fish, but of what material I do not know. It was
+of a bright flesh color, and fastened to a board on the
+floor. If I pressed my foot upon the board, it would put
+in motion some machinery within, which caused it to spring
+forward with a harsh, jarring sound like the rumbling of
+the cars. At the same time its eyes would roll round,
+and its mouth open, displaying a set of teeth so large
+and long that I was glad to keep at a safe distance. I
+wished to know whether it would really bite me or not,
+but it looked so frightful I did not dare to hazard the
+experiment.
+
+Another so nearly resembled a large serpent, I almost
+thought it was one; but I found it moved only when touched
+in a certain manner. Then it would roll over, open its
+mouth, and run out its tongue. There was another that I
+cannot describe, for I never saw anything that looked
+like it. It was some kind of a machine, and the turning
+of a crank made it draw together in such a way, that if
+a person were once within its embrace, the pressure would
+soon arrest the vital current, and stop the breath of
+life. Around the walls of the room were chains, rings
+and hooks, almost innumerable; but I did not know their
+use, and feared to touch them. I believed them all to
+be instruments of torture, and I thought they gave me a
+long chain in the hope and expectation that my curiosity
+would lead me into some of the numerous traps the room
+contained.
+
+Every morning the figure I had seen beside the dying nun,
+which they called the devil, came to my cell, and unlocking
+the door himself, entered, and walked around me, laughing
+heartily, and seeming much pleased to find me there. He
+would blow white froth from his mouth, but he never spoke
+to me, and when he went out, he locked the door after
+him and took away the key. He was, in fact, very thoughtful
+and prudent, but it will be long before I believe that
+he came as they pretended, from the spirit world. So far
+from being frightened, the incident was rather a source
+of amusement. Such questions as the following would force
+themselves upon my mind. If that image is really the
+devil, where did he get that key? And what will he do
+with it? Does the devil hold the keys of this nunnery,
+so that he can come and go as he pleases? Or, are the
+priests on such friendly terms with his satanic majesty
+that they lend him their keys? Or, do they hold them as
+partners? Gentlemen of the Grey Nunnery, please tell us
+how it is about those keys.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVI.
+
+HORRORS OF STARVATION.
+
+One day a woman came into my cell, dressed in white, a
+white cap on her head, and so very pale she looked more
+like a corpse than a living person. She came up to me
+with her mouth wide open, and stood gazing at me for a
+moment in perfect silence. She then asked, "Where have
+you been?" "Into the world," I replied. "How did you like
+the world?" "Very well," said I. She paused a moment,
+and then asked, "Did you find your friends?" "No, ma'am,"
+said I, "I did not." Another pause, and then she said,
+"Perhaps you will if you go again." "No," I replied, "I
+shall not try again." "You had better try it once more,"
+she added, and I thought there was a slight sneer in her
+tone; "Perhaps you may succeed better another time."
+"No," I replied, "I shall not try to run away from the
+nunnery again. I should most assuredly be caught and
+brought back, and then they would make me suffer so much,
+I assure you I shall never do it again." She looked at
+me a moment as though she would read my very soul, and
+said, "And so you did not find your friends, after all,
+did you?" I again told her that I did not, and she seemed
+satisfied with the result of her questioning. When she
+came in, I was pleased to see her, and thought I would
+ask her for something to eat, or at least for a little
+cold water. But she seemed so cold-hearted, so entirely
+destitute of sympathy or kind feeling, I had no courage
+to speak to her, for I felt that it would do no good.
+Perhaps I misjudged her. I knew from her looks that she
+must have been a great sufferer; but I have heard it said
+that extreme suffering sometimes hardens instead of
+softening the heart, and I believe it. It seemed to me
+that this woman had suffered so much herself, that every
+kind feeling was crushed out of her soul. I was glad when
+she left me, locking the door after her.
+
+Four days they kept me in this cell, and for five days
+and nights I had not tasted food or drink. I endured the
+most intolerable agonies from hunger and thirst. The
+suffering produced by hunger, when it becomes actual
+starvation, is far beyond anything that I can imagine.
+There is no other sensation that can be compared to it,
+and no language can describe it. One must feel it in
+order to realize what it is. The first two days I amused
+myself by walking round my room and trying to conjecture
+the use to which the various instruments were applied.
+Then I became so weak I could only think of eating and
+drinking. I sometimes fell asleep, but only to dream of
+loaded tables and luxurious feasts. Yet I could never
+taste the luxuries thus presented. Whenever I attempted
+to do so, they would be snatched away, or I would wake
+to find it all a dream. Driven to a perfect frenzy by
+the intensity of my sufferings, I would gladly have eaten
+my own flesh. Well was it for me that no sharp instrument
+was at hand, for as a last resort I more than once
+attempted to tear open my veins with my teeth.
+
+This severe paroxysm passed away, and I sank into a state
+of partial unconsciousness, in which I remained until I
+was taken out of the cell. I do not believe I should have
+lived many hours longer, nor should I ever have been
+conscious of much more suffering. With me the "bitterness
+of death had passed," and I felt disappointed and almost
+angry to be recalled to a life of misery. I begged them
+to allow me to die. It was the only boon I craved. But
+this would have been too merciful; moreover, they did
+not care to lose my services in the kitchen. I was a good
+drudge for them, and they wished to restore me on the
+same principle that a farmer would preserve the life of
+a valuable horse.
+
+I do not remember leaving the cell. The first thing I
+realized they were placing me in a chair in the kitchen,
+and allowed me to lean my head upon the table. They gave
+me some gruel, and I soon revived so that I could sit up
+in my chair and speak in a whisper. But it was some hours
+before I could stand on my feet or speak loud. An Abbess
+was in the kitchen preparing bread and wine for the
+priests (they partake of these refreshments every day at
+ten in the morning and three in the afternoon). She
+brought a pailful of wine and placed it on the table near
+me, and left a glass standing beside it. When she turned
+away, I took the glass, dipped up a little of the wine,
+and drank it. She saw me do it, but said not a word, and
+I think she left it there for that purpose. The wine was
+very strong, and my stomach so weak, I soon began to feel
+sick, and asked permission to go to bed. They took me up
+in their arms and carried me to my old room and laid me
+on the bed. Here they left me, but the Abbess soon returned
+with some gruel made very palatable with milk and sugar.
+I was weak, and my hand trembled so that I could not feed
+myself; but the Abbess kindly sat beside me and fed me
+until I was satisfied. I had nothing more to eat until
+the next day at eleven o'clock, when the Abbess again
+brought me some bread and gruel, and a cup of strong tea.
+She requested me to drink the tea as quick as possible,
+and then she concealed the mug in which she brought it
+
+I was now able to feed myself, and you may be sure I had
+an excellent appetite, and was not half so particular
+about my food as some persons I have since known. I lay
+in bed till near night, when I rose, dressed myself
+without assistance, and went down to the kitchen. I was
+so weak and trembled so that I could hardly manage to
+get down stairs; but I succeeded at last, for a strong
+will is a wonderful incentive to efficient action.
+
+In the kitchen I met the Lady Superior. She saw how weak
+I was, and as she assisted me to a chair, she said, "I
+should not have supposed that you could get down here
+alone. Have you had anything to eat to-day?" I was about
+to say yes, but one of the nuns shook her head at me,
+and I replied "No." She then brought some bread and wine,
+requesting me to eat it quick, for fear some of the
+priests might come in and detect us. Thus I saw that she
+feared the priests as well as the rest of us. Truly, it
+was a terrible crime she bad committed! No wonder she
+was afraid of being caught! Giving a poor starved nun
+a piece of bread, and then obliged to conceal it as she
+would have done a larceny or a murder! Think of it,
+reader, and conceive, if you can, the state of that
+community where humanity is a crime--where mercy is
+considered a weakness of which one should be ashamed! If
+a pirate or a highwayman had been guilty of treating a
+captive as cruelly as I was treated by those priests, he
+would have been looked upon as an inhuman monster, and
+at once given up to the strong grasp of the law. But when
+it is done by a priest, under the cloak of Religion, and
+within the sacred precincts of a nunnery, people cry out,
+when the tale is told, "Impossible!" "What motive could
+they have had?" "It cannot be true," etc. But whether
+the statement is believed or otherwise, it is a fact that
+in the Grey Nunnery at Montreal the least exhibition of
+a humane spirit was punished as a crime. The nun who was
+found guilty of showing mercy to a fellow-sufferer was
+sure to find none herself.
+
+From this time I gained very fast, for the Abbess saw
+how hungry I was, and she would either put food in my
+way, or give me privately what I wished to eat. In two
+weeks I was able to go to work in the kitchen again. But
+those I had formerly seen there were gone. I never knew
+what became of the sick nun, nor could I learn anything
+about the one who ran away with me. I thought that the
+men who brought me to St. Regis, were kept there to go
+after her, but I do not know whether they found her or
+not. For myself, I promised so solemnly, and with such
+apparent sincerity, that I would never leave the nunnery
+again, I was believed and trusted. Had I been kindly
+treated, had my life been even tolerable, my conscience
+would have reproached me for deceiving them, but as it
+was, I felt that I was more "sinned against, than sinning."
+I could not think it wrong to get away, if the opportunity
+presented, and for this I was constantly on the watch.
+Every night I lay awake long after all the rest were
+buried in slumber, trying to devise some plan, by which
+I could once more regain my liberty. And who can blame
+me? Having just tasted the sweets of freedom, how could
+I be content to remain in servitude all my life? Many a
+time have I left my bed at night, resolved to try to
+escape once more, but the fear of detection would deter
+me from the attempt.
+
+In the discharge of my daily duties, I strove to the
+utmost of my ability to please my employers. I so far
+succeeded, that for five weeks after my return I escaped
+punishment. Then, I made a slight mistake about my work,
+though I verily thought I was doing it according to the
+direction. For this, I was told that I must go without
+two meals, and spend three days in the torture room. I
+supposed it was the same room I was in before, but I was
+mistaken. I was taken into the kitchen cellar, and down
+a flight of stairs to another room directly under it.
+From thence, a door opened into another subterranean
+apartment which they called the torture room. These doors
+were so constructed, that a casual observer would not be
+likely to notice them. I had been in that cellar many
+times, but never saw that door until I was taken through
+it. A person might live in the nunnery a life-time, and
+never see or hear anything of such a place. I presume
+those visitors who call at the school-rooms, go over a
+part of the house, and leave with the impression that
+the convent is a nice place, will never believe my
+statements about this room. Nor can we wonder at their
+skepticism. It is exceedingly difficult for pure minds
+to conceive how any human being can be so fearfully
+depraved. Knowing the purity of their own intentions,
+and judging others by themselves, it is not strange that
+they regard such tales of guilt and terror as mere
+fabrications, put forth to gratify the curiosity of the
+wonder-loving crowd.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVII.
+
+THE TORTURE ROOM.
+
+I remember hearing a gentleman at the depot remark that
+the very enormity of the crimes committed by the Romanists,
+is their best protection. "For," said he, "some of their
+practices are so shockingly infamous they may not even
+be alluded to in the presence of the refined and the
+virtuous. And if the story of their guilt were told,
+who would believe the tale? Far easier would it be to
+call the whole a slanderous fabrication, than to believe
+that man can be so vile."
+
+This consideration led me to doubt the propriety of
+attempting a description of what I saw in that room. But
+I have engaged to give a faithful narrative of what
+transpired in the nunnery; and shall I leave out a part
+because it is so strange and monstrous, that people will
+not believe it? No. I will tell, without the least
+exaggeration what I saw, heard, and experienced. People
+may not credit the story now, but a day will surely come
+when they will know that I speak the truth.
+
+As I entered the room I was exceedingly shocked at the
+horrid spectacle that met my eye. I knew that fearful
+scenes were enacted in the subterranean cells, but I
+never imagined anything half so terrible as this. In
+various parts of the room I saw machines, and instruments
+of torture, and on some of them persons were confined
+who seemed to be suffering the most excruciating agony.
+I paused, utterly overcome with terror, and for a moment
+imagined that I was a witness to the torments, which,
+the priests say, are endured by the lost, in the world
+of woe. Was I to undergo such tortures, and which of
+those infernal engines would be applied to me? I was not
+long in doubt. The priest took hold of me and put me into
+a machine that held me fast, while my feet rested on a
+piece of iron which was gradually heated until both feet
+were blistered. I think I must have been there fifteen
+minutes, but perhaps the time seemed longer than it was.
+He then took me out, put some ointment on my feet and
+left me.
+
+I was now at liberty to examine more minutely the strange
+objects around me. There were some persons in the place
+whose punishment, like my own, was light compared with
+others. But near me lay one old lady extended on a rack.
+Her joints were all dislocated, and she was emaciated to
+the last degree. I do not suppose I can describe this
+rack, for I never saw anything like it. It looked like
+a gridiron but was long enough for the tallest man to
+lie upon. There were large rollers at each end, to which
+belts were attached, with a large lever to drive them
+back and forth. Upon this rack the poor woman was fastened
+in such a way, that when the levers were turned and the
+rollers made to revolve, every bone in her body was
+displaced. Then the violent strain would be relaxed, a
+little, and she was so very poor, her skin would sink
+into the joints and remain there till it mortified and
+corrupted.
+
+It was enough to melt the hardest heart to witness her
+agony; but she bore it with a degree of fortitude and
+patience, I could not have supposed possible, had I not
+been compelled to behold it. When I entered the room
+she looked up and said, "Have you come to release me, or
+only to suffer with me?" I did not dare to reply, for
+the priest was there, but when he left us she exclaimed,
+"My child, let nothing induce you to believe this cursed
+religion. It will be the death of you, and that death,
+will be the death of a dog." I suppose she meant that
+they would kill me as they would a dog. She then asked,
+"Who put you here?" "My Father," said I. "He must have
+been a brute," said she, "or he never could have done
+it." At one time I happened to mention the name of God,
+when she fiercely exclaimed with gestures of contempt,
+"A God! You believe there is one, do you? Don't you suffer
+yourself to believe any such thing. Think you that a
+wise, merciful, and all powerful being would allow such
+a hell as this to exist? Would he suffer me to be torn
+from friends and home, from my poor children and all that
+my soul holds dear, to be confined in this den of iniquity,
+and tortured to death in this cruel manner? No, O, no.
+He would at once destroy these monsters in human form;
+he would not suffer them, for one moment, to breathe the
+pure air of heaven."
+
+At another time she exclaimed, "O, my children! my poor
+motherless children! What will become of them? God of
+mercy, protect my children!" Thus, at one moment, she
+would say there was no God, and the next, pray to him
+for help. This did not surprise me, for she was in such
+intolerable misery she did not realize what she did say.
+Every few hours the priest came in, and gave the rollers
+a turn, when her joints would crack and--but I cannot
+describe it. The sight made me sick and faint at the
+time, as the recollection of it, does now. It seemed as
+though that man must have had a heart of adamant, or he
+could not have done it. She would shriek, and groan, and
+weep, but it did not affect him in the least. He was as
+calm, and deliberate as though he had a block of wood in
+his hands, instead of a human being. When I saw him
+coming, I once shook my head at her, to have her stop
+speaking; but when he was gone, she said, "Don't shake
+your head at me; I do not fear him. He can but kill me,
+and the quicker he does it the better. I would be glad
+if he would put an end to my misery at once, but that
+would be too merciful. He is determined to kill me by
+inches, and it makes no difference what I say to him."
+
+She had no food, or drink, during the three days I was
+there, and the priest never spoke to her. He brought me
+my bread and water regularly, and I would gladly have
+given it to that poor woman if she would have taken it.
+But she would not accept the offer. It would only prolong
+her sufferings, and she wished to die. I do not suppose
+she could have lived, had she been taken out when I first
+saw her.
+
+In another part of the room, a monk was under punishment.
+He was standing in some kind of a machine, with heavy
+weights attached to his feet, and a belt passed across
+his breast under his arms. He appeared to be in great
+distress, and no refreshment was furnished him while I
+was there.
+
+On one side of the room, I observed a closet with a "slide
+door," as the nuns called them. There were several doors
+of this description in the building, so constructed as
+to slide back into the ceiling out of sight. Through this
+opening I could see an image resembling a monk; and
+whenever any one was put in there, they would shriek,
+and groan, and beg to be taken out, but I could not
+ascertain the cause of their suffering.
+
+One day a nun was brought in to be punished. The priest
+led her up to the side of the room, and bade her put her
+fingers into some holes in the wall just large enough to
+admit them. She obeyed but immediately drew them back
+with a loud shriek. I looked to see what was the matter
+with her, and lo! every nail was torn from her fingers,
+which were bleeding profusely. How it was done, I do not
+know. Certainly, there was no visible cause for such a
+surprising effect. In all probability the fingers came
+in contact with the spring of some machine on the other
+side, or within the wall to which some sharp instrument
+was attached. I would give much to know just how it was
+constructed, and what the girl had done to subject herself
+to such a terrible and unheard-of punishment. But this,
+like many other things in that establishment, was wrapped
+in impenetrable mystery. God only knows when the veil
+will be removed, or whether it ever will be until the
+day when all secret things will be brought to light.
+
+When the three days expired, I was taken out of this
+room, but did not go to work again till my feet were
+healed. I was then obliged to assist in milking the cows,
+and taking care of the milk. They had a large number of
+cows, I believe thirty-five, and dairy rooms, with every
+thing convenient for making butter and cheese. When first
+directed to go out and milk, I was pleased with the idea,
+for I hoped to find and opportunity to escape; but I was
+again disappointed. In the cow yard, as elsewhere, every
+precaution was taken to prevent it.
+
+Passing out of the main yard of the convent through a
+small door, I found myself in a small, neat yard, surrounded
+by a high fence, so that nothing could be seen but the
+sky overhead. The cows were driven in, and the door
+immediately locked, so that escape from that place seemed
+impossible.
+
+At harvest time, in company with twenty other nuns, I
+was taken out into the country to the residence of the
+monks. The ride out there was a great treat, and very
+much enjoyed by us all. I believe it was about five miles,
+through a part of the city of Montreal; the north part
+I think, but I am not sure. We stopped before a large
+white stone building, situated in the midst of a large
+yard like the one at the nunnery. A beautiful walk paved
+with stone, led from the gate to the front door, and from
+thence, around the house. Within the yard, there was also
+a delightful garden, with neat, well kept walks laid out
+in various directions. Before the front door there stood
+a large cross. I think I never saw a more charming place;
+it appeared to me a perfect paradise. I heard one of the
+priests say that the farm consisted of four hundred acres,
+and belonged to the nunnery. The house was kept by two
+widow ladies who were married before they embraced the
+Romish faith. They were the only women on the place
+previous to our arrival, and I think they must have found
+it very laborious work to wait upon so many monks. I do
+not know their number, but there was a great many of
+them, besides a large family of boys, who, I suppose,
+were being educated for priests or monks.
+
+Immediately on our arrival a part of our number were set
+to work in the fields, while the rest were kept in the
+house to assist the women. I hoped that I might be one
+of these last, but disappointment was again my lot. I
+was sent to the field with the others, and set to reaping;
+a priest being stationed near, to guard us and oversee
+our work. We were watched very closely, one priest having
+charge of two nuns, for whose safe keeping he was
+responsible. Here we labored until the harvest was all
+gathered in. I dug potatoes, cut up corn and husked it,
+gathered apples, and did all kinds of work that is usually
+done by men in the fall of the year. Yet I was never
+allowed to wear a bonnet on my head, or anything to shield
+me from the piercing rays of the sun. Some days the heat
+was almost intolerable, and my cap was not the least
+protection, but they allowed me no other covering.
+
+In consequence of this exposure, my head soon became the
+seat of severe neuralgic pain, which caused me at times
+to linger over my work. But this was not permitted. My
+movements were immediately quickened, for the work must
+be done notwithstanding the severe pain. Every command
+must be obeyed whatever the result.
+
+At night a part of our number were taken to the nunnery,
+and the rest of us locked up in our rooms in the house.
+We were not permitted to take our meals with the two
+housekeepers, but a table was set for us in another room.
+One would think that when gathering the fruit we would
+be allowed to partake of it, or at least to taste it.
+But this was not allowed; and as a priest's eye was ever
+upon us, we dare not disobey, however much we might wish
+to do so. I used to wonder if the two women who kept the
+house were as severely dealt with as we were, but had no
+means whereby to satisfy my curiosity. They were not
+allowed to converse with us, and we might not speak to
+them, or even look them in the face. Here, as at the
+nunnery, we were obliged to walk with the head bent
+forward a little, the eyes fixed on the floor, one hand,
+if disengaged, under the cape, the other down by the
+side, and on no occasion might we look a person in the
+face. The two women seemed to be governed by the same
+rules that we were, and subject to the same masters. I
+used to think a great deal about them, and longed to know
+their history. They wore blue dresses, with white caps,
+and white handkerchiefs on their necks. Their life, I
+think, was a hard one.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVIII.
+
+RETURN TO THE NUNNERY.
+
+While we remained at this place I was not punished in
+any of the usual methods. Perhaps they thought the exposure
+to a burning sun, and a severe headache, sufficient to
+keep me in subjection without any other infliction. But
+immediately on my return to the nunnery I was again
+subjected to the same cruel, capricious, and unreasonable
+punishment.
+
+On the first day after my return one of the priests came
+into the kitchen where I was at work, and I hastened to
+give him the usual respectful salutation, which I have
+before described. But he took hold of my arm and said,
+"What do you look so cross for?" And without giving me
+time to reply, even if I had dared to do so, he added,
+"I'll teach you not to look cross at me." He left the
+room, with an expression of countenance that frightened
+me. I was not aware of looking cross at him, though I
+must confess I had suffered so much at his hands already,
+I did not feel very happy in his presence; yet I always
+endeavored to treat him with all due respect. Certainly
+his accusation against me in this instance was as false
+as it was cruel. But what of that? I was only a nun, and
+who would care if I was punished unjustly? The priest
+soon returned with a band of leather, or something of
+the kind, into which thorns were fastened in such numbers
+that the inside was completely covered with them. This
+he fastened around my head with the points of the thorns
+pressing into the skin, and drew it so tight that the
+blood ran in streams over my neck and shoulders. I wore
+this band, or "crown of thorns;" as they called it, for
+six hours, and all the time continued my work as usual.
+Then I thought of the "crown of thorns" our Saviour wore
+when he gave his life a ransom for the sins of the world.
+I thought I could realize something of his personal agony,
+and the prayer of my soul went up to heaven for grace to
+follow his example and forgive my tormentors.
+
+From this time I was punished every day while I remained
+there, and for the most simple things. It was evident
+they wished to break down my spirit, but it only confirmed
+me in my resolution to get away from them as soon as
+possible.
+
+One day I chanced to close the door a little too hard.
+It was mere accident, but for doing it they burned me
+with red hot tongs. They kept them in the fire till they
+were red hot, then plunged them into cold water, drew
+them out as quickly as possible, and immediately applied
+them to my arms or feet. The skin would, of course adhere
+to the iron, and it would sometime burn down to the bone
+before they condescended to remove it. At another time
+I was cruelly burned on my arms and shoulders for not
+standing erect. The flesh was deep in some places, and
+the agony I suffered was intolerable. I thought of the
+stories the Abbess used to tell me years before about
+the martyrs who were burned at the stake. But I had not
+a martyr's faith, and I could not imitate their patience
+and resignation. The sores made on these occasions were
+long in healing, and to this day I bear upon my person
+the scars caused by these frequent burnings.
+
+I was often punished because I forgot to walk on my toes.
+For this trivial offence I have often been made to fast
+two days. We all wore cloth shoes, and it was the rule
+of the house that we should all walk on tip-toe. Sometimes
+we would forget, and take a step or two in the usual way;
+and then it did seem as though they rejoiced in the
+opportunity to inflict punishment. It was the only
+amusement they had, and there was so little variety in
+their daily life, I believe they were glad of anything
+to break in upon the monotony of convent life, and give
+them a little excitement. It was very hard for me to
+learn to walk on my toes, and as I often failed to do
+it, I was of course punished for the atrocious crime.
+But I did learn at last, for what can we not accomplish
+by resolute perseverance? Several years of practice so
+confirmed the habit that I found it as difficult to leave
+off as it was to begin. Even now I often find myself
+tripping along on tip-toe before I am aware of it.
+
+We had a very cruel abbess in the kitchen, and this was
+one reason of our being punished so often. She was young
+and inexperienced, and had just been promoted to office,
+with which she seemed much pleased and elated. She embraced
+every opportunity to exercise her authority, and often
+have I fasted two whole days for accidentally spilling
+a little water on the kitchen floor. Whenever she wished
+to call my attention to her, she did not content herself
+with simply speaking, but would box my ears, pull my
+hair, pinch my arms, and in many ways so annoy and provoke
+me that I often wished her dead. One day when I was
+cleaning knives and forks she came up to me and gave me
+such a severe pinch on my arm that I carried the marks
+for many days. I did not wait to think what I was doing,
+but turned and struck her with all my might. It could
+not have been a light blow, for I was very angry. She
+turned away, saying she should report me to the Lady
+Superior. I did not answer her, but as she passed through
+the door I threw a knife which I hoped would hit her,
+but it struck the door as she closed it. I expected
+something dreadful would be done to me after this wilful
+violation of a well known law. But I could bear it, I
+thought, and I was glad I hit her so hard.
+
+She soon returned with a young priest, who had been there
+but a short time, and his heart had not yet become so
+hard as is necessary to be a good Romish priest. He came
+to me and asked, "What is the matter?" I told him the
+Abbess punished me every day, that in fact I was under
+punishment most of the time; that I did not deserve it,
+and I was resolved to bear it no longer. I struck her
+because she pinched me for no good reason; and I should
+in future try to defend myself from her cruelty.
+
+"Do you know," said he, "what will be done to you for
+this?" "No, sir," said I, "I do not know," and I was
+about to add, "I do not care," but I restrained myself.
+He went out, and for a long time I expected to be called
+to account, but I heard no more of it. The Abbess, however,
+went on in the old way, tormenting me on every occasion.
+
+One day the priests had a quarrel among themselves, and
+if I had said a DRUNKEN QUARREL, I do not think it would
+have been a very great mistake. In the fray they stabbed
+one of their number in the side, drew him out of his
+room, and left him on the floor in the hall of the main
+building, but one flight of stairs above the kitchen.
+Two nuns, who did the chamber work, came down stairs,
+and, seeing him lie there helpless and forsaken, they
+took him by the hair of the head and drew him down to
+the kitchen. Here they began to torment him in the most
+cruel manner. They burned sticks in the fire until the
+end was a live coal, put them into his hands and closed
+them, pressing the burning wood into the flesh, and thus
+producing the most exquisite pain. At least this would
+have been the result if he had realized their cruelty.
+But I think he was insensible before they touched him,
+or if not, must have died very soon after, for I am sure
+he was dead when I first saw him.
+
+I went to them and remonstrated against such inhuman
+conduct. But one of the nuns replied, "That man has
+tormented me more than I can him, if I do my best, and
+I wish him to know how good it is." "But," said I, some
+one will come in, and you will be caught in the act."
+"I'll risk that," said she, "they are quarreling all over
+the house, and will have enough to do to look after each
+other for a while, I assure you." "But the man is dead,"
+said I. "How can you treat a senseless corpse in that
+way?" "I'm afraid he is dead," she replied, he don't move
+at all, and I can't feel his heart beat; but I did hope
+to make him realize how good the fire feels."
+
+Meanwhile, the blood was flowing from the wound in his
+side, and ran over the floor. The sight of this alarmed
+them, and they drew him into another dark hall, and left
+him beside the door of a room used for punishment. They
+then came back, locked the hall door, and washed up the
+blood. They expected to be punished for moving the dead
+body, but the floor was dry before any of the priests
+came in, and I do not think it was ever known. Perhaps
+they did not remember events as distinctly as they might
+under other circumstances, and it is very possible, that,
+when they found the corpse they might not have been able
+to say whether it was where they left it, or not. We all
+rejoiced over the death of that priest. He was a very
+cruel man; had punished me times without number, but,
+though I was glad he was dead, I could not have touched
+him when he lay helpless and insensible.
+
+A few weeks after the events just related, another trifling
+occurrence brought me into collision with the Abbess.
+And here let me remark that I have no way, by which to
+ascertain at what particular time certain events transpired.
+The reader will understand that I write this narrative
+from memory, and our life at the nunnery was so monotonous,
+the days and weeks passed by with such dull, and irksome
+uniformity, that sometimes our frequent punishments were
+the only memorable events to break in upon the tiresome
+sameness of our unvarying life. Of course the most simple
+thing was regarded by us as a great event, something
+worthy of special notice, because, for the time, it
+diverted our minds from the peculiar restraints of our
+disagreeable situation.
+
+To illustrate this remark let me relate an incident that
+transpired about this time. I was one day sent to a part
+of the house where I was not in the habit of going. I
+was passing along a dark hall, when a ray of light from
+an open door fell upon my path. I looked up, and as the
+door at that moment swung wide open, I saw, before a
+glass, in a richly furnished room, the most beautiful
+woman I ever beheld. From the purity of her complexion,
+and the bright color of her cheeks and lips, I could have
+taken her for a piece of wax work, but for the fact that
+she was carelessly arranging her hair. She was tall, and
+elegant in person, with a countenance of such rare and
+surpassing beauty, I involuntarily exclaimed, "What a
+beautiful woman!" She turned towards me with a smile of
+angelic sweetness, while an expression of sympathetic
+emotion overspread her exquisitely moulded features,
+which seemed to say as plainly as though she had spoken
+in words, "Poor child, I pity you." I now became conscious
+that I was breaking the rules of the house, and hastened
+away. But O, how many days my soul fed on that smile! I
+never saw the lady again, her name I could never know,
+but that look of tenderness will never be forgotten. It
+was something to think of through many dreary hours,
+something to look back to, and be grateful for, all the
+days of my life.
+
+But to return to my narrative. The priests had a large
+quantity of sap gathered from the maple trees, and brought
+to the nunnery to be boiled into sugar. Another nun and
+myself were left to watch it, keep the kettle filled up,
+and prevent it from burning. It was boiled in the large
+caldron of which I have before spoken, and covered with
+a large, thin, wooden cover. The sap had boiled some
+time, and become very thick. I was employed in filling
+up the kettle when the Abbess came into the room, and
+after a few inquiries, directed me to stand upon the
+cover of the caldron, and fix a large hook directly over
+it. I objected, for I know full well that it would not
+bear a fourth part of my weight. She then took hold of
+me, and tried to force me to step upon it, but I knew I
+should be burned to death, for the cover, on account of
+its enormous size was made as thin as possible, that we
+might be able to lift it. When I saw that she was
+determined to make me yield, in self defence, I threw
+her upon the floor. Would that I had been content to
+stop here. But no. When I saw her in my power, and
+remembered how much I had suffered from her, my angry
+passions rose, and I thought only of revenge.
+
+I commenced beating her with all my might, and when I
+stopped from mere exhaustion, the other nun caught her
+by the hair and began to draw her round the room. She
+struggled and shrieked, but she could not help herself.
+Her screams, however, alarmed the house, and hearing one
+of the priests coming, the nun gave her a kick and left
+her. The priest asked what we were doing, and the Abbess
+related with all possible exaggeration, the story of our
+cruelty. "But what did you do to them?" asked the priest
+"You gave them some provocation, or they never would
+treat you so." She was then obliged to tell what had
+passed between us, and he said she deserved to suffer
+for giving such an order. "Why," said he," that cover
+would not have held her a moment, and she would most
+assuredly have burned to death." He punished us all; the
+Abbess for giving the order, and us for abusing her. I
+should not have done this thing, had I not come off so
+well, when I once before attempted to defend myself; but
+my success at that time gave me courage to try it again.
+My punishment was just, and I bore it very well, consoled
+by the thought that justice was awarded to the Abbess,
+as well as myself.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIX.
+
+SICKNESS AND DEATH OF A SUPERIOR.
+
+The next excitement in our little community was caused
+by the sickness and death of our Superior. I do not know
+what her disease was, but she was sick two weeks, and
+one of the nuns from the kitchen was sent to take care
+of her. One night she was so much worse, the nun thought
+she would die, and she began to torment her in the most
+inhuman manner. She had been severely punished a short
+time before at the instigation of this woman, and she
+then swore revenge if she ever found an opportunity. Now
+it was presented. She was in her power, too weak to
+resist or call for assistance, and she resolved to let
+her know by experience how bitterly she had made others
+suffer in days gone by. It was a fiendish spirit,
+undoubtedly, that prompted her to seek revenge upon the
+dying, but what else could we expect? She only followed
+the example of her elders, and if she went somewhat beyond
+their teachings, she had, as we shall see, her reasons
+for so doing. With hot irons she burned her on various
+parts of her person, cut great gashes in the flesh upon
+her face, sides, and arms, and then rubbed salt and pepper
+into the wounds. But I will not try to describe it.
+
+The wretched woman died before morning, and the nun went
+to the priest and told him that the Superior was dead,
+and that she had killed her. The priests were immediately
+all called together, and the Bishop called upon for
+counsel. He sentenced her to be hung that morning in the
+chapel before the assembled household. The Abbess came
+and informed us what had taken place, and directed us to
+get ready and go to the chapel. When we entered, the
+doomed girl sat upon a chair on the altar. She was clad
+in a white robe, with a white cap on her head, and appeared
+calm, self-possessed, and even joyful. The Bishop asked
+her if she had anything to say for herself. She immediately
+rose and said, "I have killed the Superior, for which I
+am to be hung. I know that I deserve to die, but I have
+suffered more than death many times over, from punishments
+inflicted by her order. For many years my life has been
+one of continual suffering; and for what? For just nothing
+at all, or for the most simple things. Is it right, is
+it just to starve a person two whole days for shutting
+the door a little too hard? or to burn one with hot irons
+because a little water was accidentally spilt on the
+floor? Yet for these and similar things I have again and
+again been tortured within an inch of my life. Now that
+I am to be hung, I am glad of it, for I shall die quick,
+and be out of my misery, instead of being tortured to
+death by inches. I did this thing for this very purpose,
+for I do not fear death nor anything that comes after
+it. Talk about the existence of a God! I don't believe
+a word of it. And the story of heaven and hell, purgatory,
+and the Virgin Mary; why, it's all a humbug, like the
+rest of the vile stuff you call religion. Religion indeed!
+You wont catch us nuns believing it, and more than all
+that, you don't believe it yourselves, not one of you."
+
+She sat down, and they put a cap over her head and face,
+drew it tight around her neck, adjusted the rope, and
+she was launched into eternity. To me it seemed a horrid
+thing, and I could not look upon her dying struggles. I
+did not justify the girl in what she had done, yet I knew
+that the woman would have died if she had let her alone;
+and I also knew that worse things than that were done in
+the nunnery almost every day, and that too by the very
+men who had taken her life. I left the chapel with a firm
+resolve to make one more effort to escape from a thraldom
+that everyday became more irksome.
+
+At the door the Abbess met me, and led me to a room I
+had never seen before, where, to my great surprise, I
+found my bed. She said it was removed by her order, and
+in future I was to sleep in that room. "What! sleep here
+alone?" I exclaimed, quite forgetting, in the agitation
+of the moment, the rule of silent obedience. But she did
+not condescend to notice either my question or the
+unpleasant feelings which must have been visible in my
+features. I did feel very much troubled. I had never
+slept in a room alone a night in my life. Another nun
+always occupied the room with me, and when she was absent,
+as she often was when under punishment, the Abbess slept
+there, so that I was never alone. I did not often meet
+the girl with whom I slept, as she did not work in the
+kitchen, but whenever I did, I felt as pleased as though
+she had been my sister. Yet I never spoke to her, nor
+did she ever attempt to converse with me. Yes, strange
+as it may seem, incredible as my reader may think it, it
+is a fact, that during all the years we slept together,
+not one word ever passed between us. We did not even dare
+to communicate our thoughts by signs, lest the Abbess
+should detect us.
+
+That night I spent in my new room; but I could not sleep.
+I had heard strange hints about some room where no one
+could sleep, and where no one liked to go, though for
+what reason I could never learn. When I first entered,
+I discovered that the floor was badly stained, and, while
+speculating on the cause of those stains, I came to the
+conclusion that this was the room to which so much mystery
+was attached. It was very dark, with no window in it,
+situated in the midst of the house, surrounded by other
+rooms, and no means of ventilation except the door. I
+did not close my eyes during the whole night. I imagined
+that the door opened and shut, that persons were walking
+in the room, and I am certain that I heard noises near
+my bed for which I could not account. Altogether, it was
+the most uncomfortable night I ever spent, and I believe
+that few persons would have felt entirely at ease in my
+situation.
+
+To such a degree did these superstitious fears assail
+me, I felt as though I would endure any amount of physical
+suffering rather than stay there another night. Resolved
+to brave everything, I went to a priest and asked permission
+to speak to him. It was an unusual thing, and I think
+his curiosity was excited, for it was only in extreme
+cases that a nun ventures to appeal to a priest When I
+told him my story, he seemed much surprised, and asked
+by whose order my bed was moved to that room. I informed
+him of all the particulars, when he ordered me to move
+my bed back again. "No one," said he, "has slept in that
+room for years, and we do not wish any one to sleep
+there." I accordingly moved the bed back, and as I had
+permission from the priest, the Abbess dared not find
+fault with me.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XX.
+
+STUDENTS AT THE ACADEMY.
+
+Through the winter I continued to work as usual, leading
+the same dull, dreary, and monotonous life, varied only
+by pains, and privations. In the spring a slight change
+was made in the household arrangements, and for a short
+time I assisted some of the other nuns to do the chamber
+work for the students at the academy. There was an
+under-ground passage from the convent to the cellar of
+the academy through which we passed. Before we entered,
+the doors and windows were securely fastened, and the
+students ordered to leave their rooms, and not return
+again till we had left. They were also forbidden to speak
+to us, but whenever the teachers were away, they were
+sure to come back to their rooms, and ask us all manner
+of questions. They wished to know, they said, how long
+we were going to stay in the convent, if we really enjoyed
+the life we had chosen, and were happy in our retirement;
+if we had not rather return to the world, go into company,
+get married, etc. I suppose they really thought that we
+could leave at any time if we chose. But we did not dare
+to answer their questions, or let them know the truth.
+
+One day, when we went to do the work, we found in one of
+the rooms, some men who were engaged in painting. They
+asked us if we were contented. We did not dare to reply,
+lest they should betray us. They then began to make
+remarks about us, some of which I well remember. One of
+them said, "I don't believe they are used very well; they
+look as though they were half starved." Another replied,
+"I know they do; there is certainly something wrong about
+these convents, or the nuns would not all look so pale
+and thin." I suspect the man little thought how much
+truth there was in his remarks.
+
+Soon after the painters left we were all taken suddenly
+ill. Some were worse than others, but all were unwell
+except one nun. As all exhibited the same symptoms, we
+were supposed to have taken poison, and suspicion fastened
+on that nun. She was put upon the rack, and when she
+saw that her guilt could not be concealed, she confessed
+that she poisoned the water in the well, but she would
+not tell what she put into it, nor where she got it.
+She said she did not do it to injure the nuns, for she
+thought they were allowed so little drink with their
+food, they would not be affected by it, while those who
+drank more, she hoped to kill. She disliked all the
+priests, and the Superior, and would gladly have murdered
+them all. But for one priest in particular, she felt all
+the hatred that a naturally malignant spirit, excited by
+repeated acts of cruelty, is capable of. He had punished
+her repeatedly, and as she thought, unjustly, and she
+resolved to avenge herself and destroy her enemy, even
+though the innocent should suffer with the guilty. This
+was all wrong, fearfully wrong we must admit. But while
+we look with horror at the enormity of her crime let us
+remember that she had great provocation. I hope there
+are few who could have sought revenge in the way she did;
+yet I cannot believe that any one would endure from
+another what she was compelled to suffer from that man,
+without some feelings of resentment. Let us not judge
+too harshly this erring sister, for if her crime was
+great, her wrongs were neither small nor few, and her
+punishment was terrible.
+
+They tortured her a long time to make her tell what kind
+of poison she put in the well, and where she obtained
+it. They supposed she must have got it from the painters,
+but she would never tell where she procured it. This fact
+proves that she had some generous feelings left. Under
+any other circumstances such magnanimity would have been
+highly applauded, and in my secret soul I could not but
+admire the firmness with which she bore her sufferings.
+She was kept upon the rack until all her joints were
+dislocated, and the flesh around them mortified. They
+then carried her to her room, removed the bed, and laid
+her upon the bedcord. The nuns were all assembled to
+look at her, and take warning by her sad fate. Such a
+picture of misery I never saw before. She seemed to have
+suffered even more than the old lady I saw in the cellar.
+It was but a moment, however, that we were allowed to
+gaze upon her shrunken ghastly features, and then she
+was hid from our sight forever. The nuns, except two or
+three, were sent from the room, and thus the murder was
+consummated. What else can we call it?
+
+There was one young student at the academy whose name
+was Smalley. He was from New England, and his father
+lived at St. Albans, Vt., where he had wealth and influence.
+This young man had a little sister who used to visit at
+the convent, whom they called Sissy Smalley. She was
+young, but handsome, witty and intelligent. For one of
+her age, she was very much refined in her manners. They
+allowed her to go anywhere in the building except the
+private apartments where those deeds of darkness were
+performed which would not bear the pure light of heaven.
+I presume that no argument could convince little Sissy
+Smalley that such rooms were actually in the nunnery.
+She had been all over it, she would tell you, and she
+never saw any torture rooms, never heard of any one being
+punished, or anything of the kind. Such reports would
+appear to her as mere slanders, yet God knows they are
+true. I well remember how I used to shudder to hear that
+child praise the nunnery, tell what a nice, quiet place
+it was, and how she would like it for a permanent home.
+I hope her brother will find out the truth about it in
+season to prevent his beautiful sister from ever becoming
+a nun.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXI.
+
+SECOND ESCAPE FROM THE NUNNERY.
+
+It was early in the spring, when I again succeeded in
+making my escape. It was on a Saturday evening, when the
+priests and nearly all the nuns were In the chapel. I
+was assisted out of the yard in the same way I was before,
+and by the same person. There was still snow upon the
+ground and that they might not be able to track me, I
+entered the market and walked the whole length of it
+without attracting observation. From thence I crossed
+the street, when I saw a police officer coming directly
+towards me. I turned down a dark alley and ran for my
+life, I knew not whither. It is the duty of every police
+officer in Montreal to accompany any of the sisters whom
+they chance to meet in the street, and I knew if he saw
+me he would offer to attend me wherever I wished to go.
+Such an offer might not be refused, and, certainly, his
+company, just at that time, was neither desirable nor
+agreeable.
+
+At the end of the alley, I found myself near a large
+church, and two priests were coming directly towards me.
+It is said "the drowning catch at straws." Whether this
+be true or not, the plan which I adopted in this emergency
+seemed as hopeless for my preservation, as a straw for
+the support of the drowning. Yet it was the only course
+I could pursue, for to escape unseen was impossible. I
+therefore resolved to go boldly past them, and try to
+make them think I was a Superior going to church. Trying
+to appear as indifferent as possible, I approached, and
+saluted them in the usual way. This is done by throwing
+forward the open hand, and passing it down by the side
+with a slight inclination of the head. The priest returns
+the salutation by standing with uncovered head till you
+have passed. In the present instance, the priest said,
+as he removed his hat, "Church is in, Sister." I bowed
+again, and hastened on. With trembling limbs I ascended
+the Church steps, and stood there till the priests were
+out of sight. It was but a moment, yet it seemed a long
+time. I knew the house was filled with priests and
+students, some of whom would be sure to recognize me at
+once. What if they should come out! The thought of it
+nearly took away my breath. The cold perspiration started
+from my brow, and I felt as though I should faint. But
+my fears were not realized, and as soon as the priests
+were out of sight, I went on again. Soon I came to a
+cross street, leading to the river, where a large hotel
+stood on the corner. I followed the river, and travelled
+all night. The next day, fearing to be seen by people
+going to church, I hid in a cellar hole, covered over
+with old boards and timbers.
+
+At night I went on again, and on Sunday evening about
+ten o'clock I came to a small village where I resolved
+to seek food and lodging. Tired, hungry and cold, feeling
+as though I could not take another step, I called at one
+of the houses, and asked permission to stay over night.
+It was cheerfully granted. The lady gave me some milk,
+and I retired to rest. Next morning, I rose early and
+left before any of the family were up. I knew they were
+all Romanists, and I feared to trust them.
+
+At noon that day I arrived at St. Oars, a town, named,
+as I have been informed, for the man who owns a great
+part of it. I stopped at a public house, which, they
+called, "Lady St. Oars," where they were eating dinner.
+The landlady invited me to dine with them, and asked if
+I belonged to the convent in that place. I told her that
+I did, for I knew if I told the truth they would suspect
+me at once. "Do you eat meat?" she asked. I told her I
+did not. "Do you eat butter on your bread?" I replied in
+the affirmative, and she gave me a slice of bread and
+butter, a piece of cheese and a silver cup full of milk.
+I ate it all, and would gladly have eaten more, for I
+was very hungry. As I was about to leave, the lady
+remarked, "There was grease in that cheese, was it a sin
+for me to give it to you?" I assured her it was not, for
+I was allowed to eat milk, and the cheese being made of
+milk, there could be no sin in my eating it I told her
+that, so far from committing a sin, the blessed Virgin
+was pleased with her benevolent spirit, and would, in
+some way, reward her for her kindness.
+
+Leaving Lady St. Oars, I went on to the next town where
+I arrived at seven in the evening. I called at the house
+of a Frenchman, and asked if I could stay over night, or
+at least, be allowed to rest awhile. The man said I was
+welcome to come in, but he had no place where I could
+sleep. They were just sitting down to supper, which
+consisted of pea soup; but the lady said there was meat
+in it, and she would not invite me to partake of it; but
+she gave me a good supper of bread and milk. She thought
+I was a Sister of Charity, and I did not tell her that
+I was not. After supper, she saw that my skirt was stiff
+with mud, and kindly offered to wash it out for me,
+saying, I could rest till it was dry. I joyfully accepted
+her offer, and reclining in a corner, enjoyed a refreshing
+slumber.
+
+It was near twelve o'clock before I was ready to go on
+again, and when I asked how far it was to the next town,
+they manifested a great anxiety for my welfare. The man
+said it was seven miles to Mt. Bly, but he hoped I did
+not intend to walk. I told him I did not know whether I
+should or not, perhaps I might ride. "But are you not
+afraid to go on alone?" he asked. "St. Dennis is a bad
+place for a lady to be out alone at night, and you must
+pass a grave-yard in the south part of the town; dare
+you go by it, in the dark?" I assured him that I had no
+fear whatever, that would prevent me from going past the
+grave-yard. I had never committed a crime, never injured
+any one, and I did not think the departed would come back
+to harm me. The lady said she would think of me with some
+anxiety, for she should not dare to go past that grave-yard
+alone in the dark. I again assured her that I had no
+cause to fear, had no crime on my conscience, had been
+guilty of no neglect of duty, and if the living would
+let me alone, I did not fear the dead. They thought I
+referred to the low characters about town, and the lady
+replied, "I shall tell my beads for you and the holy
+Virgin will protect you from all harm. But remember,"
+she continued, "whenever you pass this way, you will
+always find a cordial welcome with us." I thanked her,
+and with a warm grasp of the hand we parted.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXII.
+
+LONELY MIDNIGHT WALK.
+
+It was near morning when I entered Mt. Bly, but I did
+not stop. I traveled all night, and late in the morning
+came to a respectable looking farmhouse which I thought
+might be occupied by Protestants. I always noticed that
+their houses were neater, and more comfortable than those
+of the Romanists in the same condition in life. In the
+present instance I was not disappointed in my expectations.
+The lady received me kindly, gave me some breakfast, and
+directed me to the next village. I walked all day, and
+near night arrived at St. Mary's, where I called at a
+house, and asked permission to sit and rest awhile. They
+gave me an invitation to enter, but did not offer
+refreshments. I did not like to ask for charity if I
+could avoid it, and I thought it possible they might ask
+me to stay over night. But they did not, and after a half
+hour's rest I rose to depart, and thanking them for their
+kindness inquired how far it was to the next house. They
+said it was seven miles to the first house, and nine to
+the next village.
+
+With a sad heart, I once more pursued my lonely way. Soon
+it began to rain, and the night came on, dark and dismal,
+cold and stormy, with a high wind that drove the rain
+against my face with pitiless fury. I entered a thick
+wood where no ray of light could penetrate, and at almost
+every step, I sank over shoes in the mud. Thus I wandered
+on, reflecting bitterly on my wretched fate. All the
+superstitious fears, which a convent life is so well
+calculated to produce, again assailed me, and I was
+frightened at my own wild imaginings. I thought of the
+nuns who had been murdered so cruelly, and I listened to
+the voice of the storm, as to the despairing wail of a
+lost soul. The wind swept fiercely through the leafless
+branches, now roaring like a tornado, again rising to a
+shrill shriek, or a prolonged whistle, then sinking to
+a hollow murmer, and dying away in a low sob which sounded
+to my excited fancy like the last convulsive sigh of a
+breaking heart. Once and again I paused, faint and dizzy
+with hunger and fatigue, feeling as though I could go no
+further. But there was no alternative. I must go on or
+perish. And go on I did, though, as I now look back upon
+that night's experience, I wonder how I managed to do
+so. But a kind providence, undoubtedly, watched over me,
+and good angels guided me on my way. Some time in the
+night, I think it must have been past twelve o'clock, I
+became so very weary I felt that I must rest awhile at
+all events. It was so dark I could not see a step before
+me, but I groped my way to a fence, seated myself on a
+stone with my head resting against the rails, and in that
+position I fell asleep.
+
+How long I slept, I do not know. I think it must have
+been some hours. When I awoke, my clothes were drenched
+with rain, and I was so stiff and lame, I could hardly
+move. But go I must, so I resolved to make the best of
+it, and hobble along as well as I could. At last I reached
+the village, but it was not yet morning, and I dared not
+stop. I kept on till daylight, and as soon as I thought
+people were up, I went up to a house and rapped. A woman
+came to the door, and I asked if she would allow me to
+go in, and dry my clothes, and I would have added, get
+some breakfast, but her looks restrained me. They were
+getting breakfast, but did not invite me to partake of
+it, and I dared not ask for anything to eat. When my
+clothes were dry, I thanked them for the use of their
+fire, and inquired how far it was to the next village.
+They said the next town was Highgate, but they did not
+know the distance.
+
+My tears flowed freely when I again found myself in the
+street, cold, hungry, almost sick, and entirely friendless.
+What should I do? What would become of me? One thought
+alone gave courage to my desponding heart, buoyed up my
+sinking spirits, and restored strength to my weary limbs.
+I was striving for liberty, that priceless boon, so dear
+to every human heart. I might, perhaps, obtain it. At
+least, I would try.
+
+Nerved to renewed effort by thoughts like these, I toiled
+onward. All that day I walked without a particle of
+nourishment. When I reached Highgate, it was eleven
+o'clock at night, but in one house I saw a light, and I
+ventured to rap at the door. It was opened by a pale,
+but pleasant looking woman. "Kind lady," said I, "will
+you please tell me how far it is to the States?" "To the
+States!" she exclaimed, and in a moment she seemed to
+understand both my character and situation. "You are
+now in Vermont State," said she, "but come in child, you
+look sad and weary." I at once accepted her offer, and
+when she asked how far I was traveling, and how I came
+to be out so late, I did not hesitate to reveal to her
+my secret, for I was sure she could be trusted. She
+invited me to spend the remainder of the night, and gave
+me some refreshment. She was nursing a sick woman, which
+accounted for her being up so late, but did not prevent
+her from attending to all my wants, and making me as
+comfortable as possible. When she saw that my feet were
+wounded, badly swollen, and covered with blood and dirt,
+she procured warm water, and with her own hands bathed,
+and made them clean, with the best toilet soap. She
+expressed great sympathy for the sad condition my feet
+were in, and asked if I had no shoes? I told her that my
+shoes were made of cloth, and soon wore out; that what
+was left of them, I lost in the mud, when traveling
+through the woods in the dark. She then procured a pair
+of nice woollen stockings, and a pair of new shoes, some
+under clothes, and a good flannel skirt, which she begged
+me to wear for her sake. I accepted them gratefully, but
+the shoes I could not wear, my feet were so sore. She
+said I could take them with me, and she gave me a pair
+of Indian moccasins to wear till my feet were healed.
+Angel of mercy that she was; may God's blessing rest upon
+her for her kindness to the friendless wanderer.
+
+The next morning the good lady urged me to stay with her,
+at least, for a time, and said I should be welcome to a
+home there for the rest of my life. Grateful as I was
+for her offer, I was forced to decline it, for I knew
+that I could not remain so near Montreal in safety. She
+said the "select men" of the town would protect me, if
+they were made acquainted with my peculiar situation.
+Dear lady! she little knew the character of a Romish
+priest! Her guileless heart did not suspect the cunning
+artifice by which they accomplish whatever they undertake.
+And those worthy "select men," I imagine, were not much
+better informed than herself. Sure I am, that any protection
+they could offer me, would not, in the least degree,
+shield me from the secret intrigue, the affectionate,
+maternal embrace of holy Mother Church.
+
+When she found that, notwithstanding all her offers, I
+was resolved to go, she put into a basket, a change of
+clothing, the shoes she had given me, and a good supply
+of food which she gave me for future use. But the most
+acceptable part of her present was a sun-bonnet; for thus
+far I had nothing on my head but the cap I wore in the
+convent. She gave me some money, and bade me go to
+Swanton, and there, she said, I could take the cars. I
+accordingly bade her farewell, and, basket in hand,
+directed my steps toward the depot some seven miles
+distant, as I was informed; but I thought it a long seven
+miles, as I passed over it with my sore feet, the blood
+starting at every step.
+
+On my arrival at the depot, a man came to me, and asked
+where I wished to go. I told him I wished to go as far
+into the State as my money would carry me. He procured
+me a ticket, and said it would take me to St. Albans. He
+asked me where I came from, but I begged to be excused
+from answering questions. He then conducted me to the
+ladies room, and left me, saying the cars would be along
+in about an hour.
+
+In this room, several ladies were waiting to take the
+cars. As I walked across the room, one of them said, in
+a tone that grated harshly on my feelings, "Your skirt
+is below your dress." I did not feel very good natured,
+and instead of saying "thank you," as I should have done,
+I replied in the most impudent manner, "Well, it is clean,
+if it is in sight." The lady said no more, and I sat down
+upon a sofa and fell asleep. As I awoke, one of the ladies
+said, "I wonder who that poor girl is!" I was bewildered,
+and, for the moment, could not think where I was, but I
+thought I must make some reply, and rousing myself I
+turned to her, and said, "I am a nun, if you wish to
+know, and I have just escaped from a convent." She gave
+me a searching look, and said, "Well, I must confess you
+do look like one. I often visit in Montreal where I see
+a great many of them, and they always look poor and pale.
+Will you allow me to ask you a few questions?" By this
+time, I was wide awake, and realized perfectly where I
+was, and the folly of making such an imprudent disclosure.
+I would have given much to recall those few words, for
+I had a kind of presentiment that they would bring me
+trouble. I begged to be excused from answering any
+questions, as I was almost crazy with thinking of the
+past and did not wish to speak of it.
+
+The lady said no more for some time, but she kept her
+eye upon me, in a way that I did not like; and I began
+to consider whether I had better wait for the cars, or
+start on foot. I was sorry for my imprudence, but it
+could not be helped now, and I must do the best I could
+to avoid the unpleasant consequences which might result
+from it. I had just made up my mind to go on, when I
+heard in the far distance, the shrill whistle of the
+approaching train; that train which I fondly hoped would
+bear me far away from danger, and onward to the goal of
+my desires.
+
+At this moment, the lady crossed the room, and seating
+herself by my side, asked, "Would you not like to go and
+live with me? I have one waiting maid now, but I wish
+for another, and if you will go, I will take you and give
+you good wages. Your work will not be hard; will you
+go?" "Where do you go?" I asked. "To Montreal," she
+replied. "Then I shall not go with you," said I. "No
+money could induce me to return there again." "Ah!" said
+she, with a peculiar smile, "I see how it is, but you
+need not fear to trust me. I will protect you, and never
+suffer you to be taken back to the convent." I saw that
+I had made unconsciously another imprudent revelation,
+and resolved to say no more. I was about to leave her,
+but she drew me back saying, "I will give you some of my
+clothes, and I can make them fit you so well that no one
+will ever recognize you. I shall have plenty of time to
+alter them if they require it, for the train that I go
+in, will not he along for about three hours; you can help
+me, and in that time we will get you nicely fixed."
+
+I could hardly repress a smile when I saw how earnest
+she was, and I thought it a great pity that a plan so
+nicely laid out should be so suddenly deranged, but I
+could not listen to her flatteries. I suspected that she
+was herself in the employ of the priests, and merely
+wished to get me back that she might betray me. She had
+the appearance of being very wealthy, was richly clad,
+wore a gold watch, chain, bracelets, breastpin, ear rings,
+and many finger rings, all of the finest gold. But with
+all her wealth and kind offers, I dare not trust her. I
+thought she looked annoyed when I refused to go with her,
+but when I rose to go to the cars, a look of angry
+impatience stole over, her fine features, which convinced
+me that I had escaped a snare.
+
+The cars came at length, and I was soon on my way to St.
+Albans. I was very sick, and asked a gentleman near me
+to raise the windows. He did so, and inquired how far I
+was going. I informed him, when he remarked that he was
+somewhat acquainted in St. Albans, and asked with whom
+I designed to stop. I told him I had no friends or
+acquaintance in the place, but I hoped to get employment
+in some protestant family. He said he could direct me to
+some gentlemen who would, he thought, assist me. One in
+particular, he mentioned as being a very wealthy man,
+and kept a number of servants; perhaps he would employ
+me.
+
+This gentleman's name was Branard, and my informant spoke
+so highly of the family, I immediately sought them out
+on leaving the cars, and was at once employed by Mrs.
+Branard, as a seamstress. Here I found a quiet, happy
+home. Mrs. Branard was a kind sympathizing woman, and
+to her, I confided the history of my convent life. She
+would not allow me to work hard, for she saw that my
+nerves were easily excited. She made me sit with her in
+her own room a great part of the time, and did not wish
+me to go out alone. They had several boarders in the
+family, and one of them was a brother-in-law [Footnote:
+This gentleman was Mr. Z. K. Pangborn, late editor of
+the Worcester Daily Transcript. Both Mr. and Mrs. Pangborn
+give their testimony of the truth of this statement.] to
+Mrs. Branard. His name I have forgotten; it was not a
+common name, but he married Mrs. Branard's sister, and
+with his wife resided there all the time that I was with
+them. Mr. Branard was away from home most of the time,
+so that I saw but little of him. They had an Irish girl
+in the kitchen, named Betsy. She was a kind, pleasant
+girl, and she thought me a strict Romanist because I said
+my prayers so often, and wore the Holy Scapulary round
+my neck. This Scapulary is a band with a cross on one
+side, and on the other, the letters "J. H. S." which
+signify, "Jesus The Savior of Man."
+
+At this place I professed great regard for the Church of
+Rome, and no one but Mrs. Branard was acquainted with my
+real character and history. When they asked my name, I
+told them they could call me Margaret, but it was an
+assumed name. My own, for reasons known only by myself,
+I did not choose to reveal. I supposed, of course, they
+would regard me with suspicion for a while, but I saw
+nothing of the kind. They treated me with great respect,
+and no questions were ever asked. Perhaps I did wrong
+in changing my name, but I felt that I was justified in
+using any means to preserve my liberty.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIII.
+
+FLIGHT AND RECAPTURE.
+
+Four happy weeks I enjoyed unalloyed satisfaction in the
+bosom of this charming family. It was a new thing for me
+to feel at home, contented, and undisturbed; to have
+every one around me treat me with kindness and even
+affection. I sometimes feared it was too good to last.
+Mrs. Branard in particular, I shall ever remember with
+grateful and affectionate regard. She was more like a
+mother to me, than a mistress, and I shall ever look back
+to the time I spent with her, as a bright spot in the
+otherwise barren desert of my life. Better, far better
+would it have been for me had I never left her. But I
+became alarmed, and thought the convent people were after
+me. It was no idle whim, no imaginary terror. I had good
+cause to fear, for I had several times seen a priest go
+past, and gaze attentively at the house. I knew him at
+the first glance, having often seen him in Montreal.
+
+Then my heart told me that they had traced me to this
+place, and were now watching a chance to get hold of me.
+Imagine, if you can, my feelings. Had I suffered so much
+in vain? Would they be allowed to take me back to those
+fearful cells, where no ray of mercy could ever reach
+me? I could not endure the thought. Frightened, and
+almost beside myself, I resolved to make an effort to
+find a more secure place. I therefore left those kind
+friends in the darkness of night, without one word of
+farewell, and without their knowledge. I knew they would
+not allow me to go, if they were apprised of my design.
+In all probability, they would have ridiculed my fears,
+and bade me rest in peace. How could I expect them to
+comprehend my danger, when they knew so little of the
+machination of my foes? I intended to go further into
+the state, but did not wish to have any one know which
+way I had gone. It was a sad mistake, but how often in
+this world do we plunge into danger when we seek to avoid
+it! How often fancy ourselves in security when we stand
+upon the very brink of ruin!
+
+I left Mr. Branard's in the evening, and called upon a
+family in the neighborhood whose acquaintance I had made,
+and whom I wished to see once more, though I dared not
+say farewell. I left them between the hours of nine and
+ten, and set forward on my perilous journey. I had gone
+but a short distance when I heard the sound of wheels
+and the heavy tread of horses' feet behind me. My heart
+beat with such violence it almost stopped my breath, for
+I felt that they were after me. But there was no escape--
+no forest or shelter near where I could seek protection.
+On came the furious beasts, driven by no gentle hand.
+They came up with me, and I almost began to hope that my
+fears were groundless, when the horses suddenly stopped,
+a strong hand grasped me, a gag was thrust into my mouth,
+and again the well-known box was taken from the wagon.
+Another moment and I was securely caged, and on my way
+back to Montreal. Two men were in the wagon and two rode
+on horseback beside it. Four men to guard one poor nun!
+
+They drove to Mt. Bly, where they stopped to change
+horses, and the two men on horseback remained there,
+while the other two mounted the wagon and drove to Sorel.
+Here the box was taken out and carried on board a boat,
+where two priests were waiting for me. When the boat
+started, they took me out for the first time after I was
+put into it at St. Albans. Three days we had been on the
+way, and I had tasted neither food nor drink. How little
+did I think when I took my tea at Mr. Branard's the night
+I left that it was the last refreshment I would have for
+SEVEN DAYS; yet such was the fact. And how little did
+they think, as they lay in their quiet beds that night,
+that the poor fugitive they had taken to their home was
+fleeing for life, or for that which, to her, was better
+than life. Yet so it was. Bitterly did I reproach myself
+for leaving those kind friends as I did, for I thought
+perhaps if I had remained there, they would not have
+dared to touch me. Such were my feelings then; but as I
+now look back, I can see that it would have made little
+difference whether I left or remained. They were bound
+to get me, at all events, and if I had stopped there
+until they despaired of catching me secretly, they would
+undoubtedly have come with an officer, and accused me of
+some crime, as a pretext for taking me away. Then, had
+any one been so far interested for me as to insist on my
+having a fair trial, how easy for them to produce witnesses
+enough to condemn me! Those priests have many ways to
+accomplish their designs. The American people don't know
+them yet; God grant they never may.
+
+On my arrival at the nunnery I was taken down the coal
+grate, and fastened to an iron ring in the back part of
+a cell. The Archbishop then came down and read my
+punishment. Notwithstanding the bitter grief that oppressed
+my spirit, I could not repress a smile of contempt as
+the great man entered my cell. I remembered that before
+I ran away, my punishments were assigned by a priest,
+but the first time I fled from them a Bishop condescended
+to read my sentence, and now his honor the Archbishop
+graciously deigned to illume my dismal cell with the
+light of his countenance, and his own august lips pronounced
+the words of doom. Was I rising in their esteem, or did
+they think to frighten me into obedience by the grandeur
+of his majestic mien?
+
+Such were my thoughts as this illustrious personage
+proceeded slowly, and with suitable dignity, to unroll
+the document that would decide my fate. What would it
+be? Death? It might be for aught I knew, or cared to
+know. I had by this time become perfectly reckless, and
+the whole proceeding seemed so ridiculous, I found it
+exceedingly difficult to maintain a demeanor sufficiently
+solemn for the occasion. But when the fixed decree came
+forth, when the sentence fell upon my ear that condemned
+me to SEVEN DAYS' STARVATION, it sobered me at once. Yet
+even then the feeling of indignation was so strong within
+me, I could not hold my peace. I would speak to that man,
+if he killed me for it. Looking him full in the face
+(which, by the way, I knew was considered by him a great
+crime), I asked, "Do you ever expect to die?" I did not,
+of course, expect an answer, but he replied, with a smile,
+"Yes; but you will die first" He then asked how long I
+had fasted, and I replied, "Three days." He said, "You
+will fast four days more, and you will be punished every
+day until next December, when you will take the black
+veil." As he was leaving the room, he remarked, "We do
+not usually have the nuns take the black veil until they
+are twenty-one; but you have such good luck in getting
+away, we mean to put you where you can't do it." And with
+this consoling thought he left me--left me in darkness
+and despair, to combat, as best I could, the horrors of
+starvation. This was in the early part of winter, and
+only about a year would transpire before I entered that
+retreat from which none ever returned. And then to be
+punished every day for a year! What a prospect! The priest
+came every morning, with his dark lantern, to look at
+me; but he never spoke. On the second day after my return,
+I told him if he would bring me a little piece of bread,
+I would never attempt to run away again, but would serve
+him faithfully the rest of my life. Had he given it to
+me, I would have faithfully kept my word; but he did not
+notice me, and closing the door, he left me once more to
+pass through all the agonies of starvation. I remember
+nothing after that day. Whether I remained in the cell
+the other two days, or was taken out before the time
+expired, I do not know. This much, however, I do know,
+as a general rule a nun's punishment is never remitted.
+If she lives, it is well; if she dies, no matter; there
+are enough more, and no one will ever call them to an
+account for the murder.
+
+But methinks I hear the reader ask, "Did they not fear
+the judgment of God and a future retribution?" In reply
+I can only state what I believe to be the fact. It is my
+firm belief that not more than one priest in ten thousand
+really believes in the truth of Christianity, or even in
+the existence of a God. They are all Infidels or Atheists;
+and how can they be otherwise? It is the legitimate fruit
+of that system of deceit which they call religion. Of
+course I only give this as my opinion, founded on what
+I have seen and heard. You can take it, reader, for what
+it is worth; believe it or not, just us you please; but
+I assure you I have often heard the nuns say that they
+did not believe in any religion. The professions of
+holiness of heart and parity of life so often made by
+the priests they KNOW to be nothing but a hypocritical
+pretence, and their ceremonies they regard as a ridiculous
+farce.
+
+For some time after I was taken from the cell I lay in
+a state of partial unconsciousness, but how long, I do
+not know. I have no recollection of being taken up stairs,
+but I found myself on my bed, in my old room, and on the
+stand beside me were several cups, vials, etc. The Abbess
+who sat beside me, occasionally gave me a tea-spoonful
+of wine or brandy, and tried to make me eat. Ere long,
+my appetite returned, but it was several weeks before my
+stomach was strong enough to enable me to satisfy in any
+degree, the cravings of hunger. When I could eat, I gained
+very fast, and the Abbess left me in the care of a nun,
+who came in occasionally to see if I wanted anything.
+This nun often stopped to talk with me, when she thought
+no one was near, and expressed great curiosity to know
+what I saw in the world; if people were kind to me, and
+if I did not mean to get away again, if possible, I told
+her I should not; but she replied, "I don't believe that.
+You will try again, and you will succeed yet, if you keep
+up good courage. You are so good to work, they do not
+wish to part with you, and that is one reason why they
+try so hard to get you back again. But never mind, they
+won't get you next time." I assured her I should not try
+to escape again, for they were sure to catch me, and as
+they had almost killed me this time, they would quite
+the next. I did not dare to trust her, for I supposed
+the Superior had given her orders to question me.
+
+I was still weak, so weak that I could hardly walk when
+they obliged me to go into the kitchen to clean vegetables
+and do other light work, and as soon as I had sufficient
+strength, to milk the cows, and take the care of the
+milk. They punished me every day, in accordance with the
+Bishop's order, and sometimes, I thought, more than he
+intended. I wore thorns on my head, and peas in my shoes,
+was whipped and pinched, burnt with hot irons, and made
+to crawl through the underground passage I have before
+described. In short, I was tortured and punished in every
+possible way, until I was weary of my life. Still they
+were careful not to go so far as to disable me from work.
+They did not care how much I suffered, if I only performed
+my daily task.
+
+There was an underground passage leading from the nunnery
+to a place which they called, "Providence," in the south
+part of the city. I do not know whether it is a school,
+or a convent, or what it is, but I think it must be some
+distance, from what I heard said about it. The priest
+often spoke of sending me there, but for some reason, he
+did not make me go. Still the frequent reference to what
+I so much dreaded, kept me in constant apprehension and
+alarm. I have heard the priest say that underground
+passages extended from the convent in every direction,
+for a distance of five miles; and I have reason to believe
+the statement is true. But these reasons I may not attempt
+to give. There are things that may not even be alluded
+to, and if it were possible to speak of them, who would
+believe the story?
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIV.
+
+RESOLVES TO ESCAPE.
+
+As summer approached, I expected to be sent to the farm
+again, but for some reason I was still employed in the
+kitchen. Yet I could not keep my mind upon my work. The
+one great object of my life; the subject that continually
+pressed upon my mind was the momentous question, how
+shall I escape? The dreaded December was rapidly
+approaching. To some it would bring a joyous festival,
+but to me, the black veil and a life long imprisonment.
+Once within those dreary walls, and I might as well hope
+to escape from the grave. Such are the arrangements,
+there is no chance for a nun to escape unless she is
+promoted to the office of Abbess or Superior. Of course,
+but few of them can hope for this, especially, if they
+are not contented; and certainly, in my case there was
+not the least reason to expect anything of the kind.
+Knowing these facts, with the horrors of the Secret
+Cloister ever before me, I felt some days as though on
+the verge of madness. Before the nuns take the black
+veil, and enter this tomb for the living, they are put
+into a room by themselves, called the forbidden closet,
+where they spend six months in studying the Black Book.
+Perchance, the reader will remember that when I first
+came to this nunnery, I was taken by the door-tender to
+this forbidden closet, and permitted to look in upon the
+wretched inmates. From that time I always had the greatest
+horror of that room. I was never allowed to enter it,
+and in fact never wished to do so, but I have heard the
+most agonizing groans from those within, and sometimes
+I have heard them laugh. Not a natural, hearty laugh,
+however, such as we hear from the gay and happy, but a
+strange, terrible, sound which I cannot describe, and
+which sent a thrill of terror through my frame, and seemed
+to chill the very blood in my veins.
+
+I have heard the priests say, when conversing with each
+other, while I was tidying their room, that many of these
+nuns lose their reason while studying the Black Book. I
+can well believe this, for never in my life did I ever
+witness an expression of such unspeakable, unmitigated
+anguish, such helpless and utter despair as I saw upon
+the faces of those nuns. And well they may despair. Kept
+under lock and key, their windows barred, and no air
+admitted to the room except what comes through the iron
+grate of their windows from other apartments; compelled
+to study, I know not what; with no hope of the least
+mitigation of their sufferings, or relaxation of the
+stringent rules that bind them; no prospect before them
+but a life-long imprisonment; what have they to hope for?
+Surely, death and the grave are the only things to which
+they can look forward with the least degree of satisfaction.
+
+Those nuns selected for this Secret Cloister are generally
+the fairest, the most beautiful of the whole number. I
+used to see them in the chapel, and some of them were
+very handsome. They dressed like the other nuns, and
+always looked sad and broken hearted, but were not pale
+and thin like the rest of us. I am sure they were not
+kept upon short allowance as the others were, and starvation
+was not one of their punishments, whatever else they
+might endure. The plain looking girls were always selected
+to work in the kitchen, and do the drudgery about the
+house. How often have I thanked God for my plain face!
+But for that, I might not have been kept in the kitchen
+so long, and thus found means to escape which I certainly
+could not have found elsewhere.
+
+With all my watching, and planning I did not find an
+opportunity to get away till June. I then, succeeded in
+getting outside the convent yard one evening between
+eight and nine o'clock. How I got there, is a secret I
+shall never reveal. A few yards from the gate I was
+stopped by one of the guard at the Barrack, who asked
+where I was going. "To visit a sick woman," I promptly
+replied, and he let me pass. Soon after this, before my
+heart ceased to flutter, I thought I heard some one
+running after me. My resolution was at once taken. I
+would never be caught and carried back alive. My fate
+was at last, I thought, in my own hands. Better die at
+once than to be chained like a guilty criminal, and suffer
+as I had done before. Blame me not gentle reader, when
+I tell you that I stood upon the bank of the river with
+exultant joy; and, as I pursued my way along the tow-path,
+ready to spring into the water on the first indication
+of danger, I rejoiced over the disappointment of my
+pursuers in losing a servant who had done them so good
+service. At a little distance I saw a ferry boat, but
+when I asked the captain to carry me over the river, he
+refused. He was, probably, afraid of the police and a
+fine, for no one can assist a run-away nun with impunity,
+if caught in the act. He directed me, however, to the
+owner of the boat, who said I could go if the captain
+was willing to carry me. I knew very well that he would
+not, and I took my place in the boat as though I had a
+perfect right to it.
+
+We were almost across the river, when the captain saw
+me, and gave orders to turn back the boat, and leave me
+on the shore from whence we started. From his appearance
+I thought we were pursued, and I was not mistaken. Five
+priests were following us in another boat, and they too,
+turned back, and reached the shore almost as soon as we
+did. I left the boat and ran for my life. I was now sure
+that I was pursued; there could be no doubt of that, for
+the sound of footsteps behind me came distinct to my ear.
+At a little distance stood a small, white house. Could
+I not reach it? Would not the people protect me? The
+thought gave me courage, and I renewed my efforts. Nearer
+came the footsteps, but I reached the house, and without
+knocking, or asking permission, I sprang through the
+door.
+
+The people were in bed, in another room, but a man looked
+out, and asked what I wanted. "I'm a nun," said I. "I've
+run away from the Grey Nunnery, and they're after me.
+Hide me, O hide me, and God will bless you!" As I spoke
+he put out his hand and opened the cellar door. "Here,"
+said he, "run down cellar, I'll be with you in a moment."
+I obeyed, and he struck a light and followed. Pointing
+to a place where he kept ashes, he said hastily, "Crawl
+in there." There was not a moment to lose, for before he
+had covered up my hiding place, a loud knock was heard
+upon the front door. Having extinguished his light, he
+ran up stairs, and opened the door with the appearance
+of having just left his bed. "Who is here?" he asked,
+"and what do you want this time of night?" One of them
+replied, "We are in search of a nun, and are very sure
+she came in here?" "Well gentlemen," said he, "walk in,
+and see for yourselves. If she is here, you are at liberty
+to find her." Lighting a candle, he proceeded to guide
+them over the house, which they searched until they were
+satisfied. They then came down cellar, and I gave up all
+hope of escape. Still, I resolved never to be taken alive.
+I could strangle myself, and I would do it, rather than
+suffer as I did before. At that moment I could truly say
+with the inspired penman, with whose language I have
+since become familiar, "my soul chooseth strangling and
+death rather than life."
+
+They looked all around me, and even into the place where
+I lay concealed, but they did not find me. At length I
+heard them depart, and so great was my joy, I could hardly
+restrain my feelings within the bounds of decorum. I felt
+as though I must dance and sing, shout aloud or leap for
+joy at my great deliverance. I am sure I should have
+committed some extravagant act had not the gentleman at
+that moment called me up, and told me that my danger was
+by no means past. This information so dashed my cup of
+bliss that I was able to drink it quietly.
+
+He gave me some refreshment, and as soon as safety would
+permit, saddled his horse, and taking me on behind him,
+carried me six miles to another boat, put me on board,
+and paid the captain three dollars to carry me to Laprairie.
+On leaving me, he gave me twenty-five cents, and said,
+"you'll be caught if you go with the other passengers."
+The captain said he could hide me and no one know that
+I was on board, but himself. He led me to the end of the
+boat, and put me upon a board over the horses. He fixed
+a strong cord for me to hold on by, and said, "you must
+be careful and not fall down, for the horses would
+certainly kill you before you could be taken out." The
+captain was very kind to me and when I left him, gave me
+twenty-five cents, and some good advice. He said I must
+hurry along as fast as possible, for it was Jubilee, and
+the priests would all be in church at four o'clock. He
+also advised me not to stop in any place where a Romish
+priest resided, "for," said he, "the convent people have,
+undoubtedly, telegraphed all over the country giving a
+minute description of your person, and the priests will
+all be looking for you."
+
+Two days I travelled as fast as my strength would allow,
+when I came to Sorel, which was on the other side of the
+river. Here I saw several priests on the road coming
+directly towards me. That they were after me, I had not
+a doubt. Whither should I flee? To escape by running,
+was out of the question, but just at that moment my eye
+fell upon a boat near the shore. I ran to the captain,
+and asked him to take me across the river. He consented,
+and, as I expected, the priests took another boat and
+followed us. Once more I gave myself up for lost, and
+prepared to spring into the water, if they were likely
+to overtake me. The man understood my feelings, and
+exerted all his strength to urge forward the boat. At
+last it reached the shore, and as he helped me out he
+whispered, "Now run." I did run, but though my own liberty
+was at stake I could not help thinking about the
+consequences to that man if I escaped, for I knew they
+would make him pay a heavy fine for his benevolent act.
+A large house stood in my way, and throwing open the door
+I exclaimed, "Are there any protestants here?" "O, yes,"
+replied a man who sat there, "come with me." He led me
+to the kitchen, where a large company of Irish men were
+rolling little balls on a table. I saw the men were Irish
+and my first thought was, "I am betrayed."
+
+But my fears were soon relieved, for the man exclaimed,
+"Here is a nun, inquiring for protestants." "Well,"
+replied one who seemed to be a leader, "this is the right
+place to find them. We are all true Orange men." And then
+they all began to shout, "Down with the Catholics! Down
+with the Pope! Death to the Jesuits! etc." I was frightened
+at their violence, but their leader came to me, and with
+the kindness of a brother, said, "Do not fear us. If you
+are a run-away, we will protect you." He bade the men be
+still and asked if any one was after me. I told him about
+the priests, and he replied, "you have come to the right
+place for protection, for they dare not show themselves
+here. I am the leader of a band of Anti-Catholics, and
+this is their lodge. You have heard of us, I presume; we
+are called Orange men. Our object is, to overthrow the
+Roman Catholic religion, and we are bound by the most
+fearful oaths to stand by each other, and protect all
+who seek our aid. The priests dread our influence, for
+we have many members, and I hope ere long, the power of
+the Pope in this country will be at an end. I am sure
+people must see what a cruel, hypocritical set they are."
+
+Before he had done speaking, a man came to the door and
+said, "The carriage is ready." Another of the men, on
+hearing this, said, "Come with me, and I'll take you out
+of the reach of the priests." He conducted me to a
+carriage, which was covered and the curtains all fastened
+down. He helped me into it, directing me to sit upon the
+back seat, where I could not be seen by any one unless
+they took particular pains. He drove to St. Oars that
+night, and, if I remember right, he said the distance
+was twelve miles. When, he left me he gave me twenty-five
+cents. I travelled all night, and about midnight passed
+through St. Dennis, But I did not stop until the next
+morning, when I called at a house and asked for something
+to eat. The lady gave me some bread and milk, and I again
+pursued my way.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXV.
+
+EVENTFUL JOURNEY.
+
+Once more I had the good fortune to obtain a passage
+across the river in a ferry-boat, and was soon pressing
+onward upon the other side. Passing through two places
+called St. Mary's and St. John's, I followed the railroad
+to a village which I was informed was called Stotsville,
+[Footnote: I beg leave once more to remind the reader
+that it is by no means certain that I give these names
+correctly. Hearing them pronounced, with no idea of ever
+referring to them again, it is not strange that mistakes
+of this kind should occur.] a great part of the property
+being owned by a Mr. Stots, to whom I was at once directed.
+Here I stopped, and was kindly received by the gentleman
+and his wife. They offered me refreshments, gave me some
+articles of clothing, and then he carried me twelve miles,
+and left me at Rouse's Point, to take the cars for Albany.
+He gave me six dollars to pay my expenses, and a letter
+of introduction to a gentleman by the name of Williams,
+in which he stated all the facts he knew concerning me,
+and commended me to his care for protection. I think he
+said Mr. Williams lived on North Pearl street, but I may
+be mistaken in this and also in some other particulars.
+As I had no thought of relating these facts at the time
+of their occurrence, I did not fix them in my mind as I
+otherwise should have done.
+
+Mr. Stots said that if I could not find the gentleman to
+whom the letter was directed, I was to take it to the
+city authorities, and they would protect me. As he assisted
+me from the carriage he said, "You will stop here until
+the cars come along, and you must get your own ticket.
+I shall not notice you again, and I do not wish you to
+speak to me." I entered the depot intending to follow
+his directions; but when I found the cars would not come
+along for three hours, I did not dare to stay. There was
+quite a large collection of people there, and I feared
+that some one would suspect and stop me. I therefore
+resolved to follow the railroad, and walk on to the next
+station. On my way I passed over a railroad bridge, which
+I should think was two miles long. The wind blew very
+hard at the time, and I found it exceedingly difficult
+to walk upon the narrow timbers. More than once I came
+near losing my precarious footing, and I was in constant
+fear that the train would overtake me before I got over.
+In that case I had resolved to step outside the track
+where I thought I could stand upon the edge of the bridge
+and hold on by the telegraph poles, and thus let them
+pass without doing me injury. Happily, however, I was
+not compelled to resort to this perilous expedient, but
+passed the bridge in safety. At the end I found another
+nearly as long, connected with it by a drawbridge. When
+I drew near it was up for a boat to pass; but a man called
+to me, and asked if I wish to go over. I told him I did,
+and he let down the bridge. As I approached him he asked,
+"Are you mad? or how came you here?" I told him I had
+walked from the depot at Rouse's Point. He appeared
+greatly surprised, and said, "You are the first person
+who ever walked over that bridge. Will you come to my
+house and rest awhile? You must be very weary, and my
+wife will be glad to see you. She is rather lonely here,
+and is pleased to see any one. Will you come? 'Tis only
+a short distance, just down under the bridge." Those last
+words decided me. I thanked him, but firmly refused to
+go one step out of my way. I thought that he wished to
+deceive me, perhaps take me to some out-of-the-way place,
+and give me up to my pursuers. At all events, it was wise
+not to trust him, for I was sure there was no house near
+the bridge, certainly not under it. I have since learned
+that such is the fact. As I turned to leave him, he again
+urged me to stop, and said, "The cars will soon be along,
+and they will run over you. How do you expect to get out
+of their way?" I told him I would risk it, and left him.
+I passed on in safety, and soon came to the depot, where
+I took the evening train for Albany. At eight the same
+evening I left the cars, and walked on towards Troy,
+which I think was four miles distant. Here I met a lad,
+of whom I inquired the way to Albany. "You cannot get
+there to-night," said he, "and I advise you not to try."
+When he saw that I was determined to go on, he said I
+would pass a tavern called the half-way house, and if I
+was tired I could stop there. It was about eleven o'clock
+when I passed this house, There were several persons on
+the piazza, laughing, talking, and singing, who called
+me as I passed, shouted after me, and bade me stop.
+Exceedingly frightened, I ran with all possible speed,
+but they continued to call after me till I was out of
+hearing. Seeing a light at a house near by, I ventured
+to rap on the door. It was opened by a woman, who asked
+me to walk in. I inquired the distance to Albany. She
+informed me, but said, "You can't go there to-night." I
+told her I must, "Well," said she, "if you will go, the
+watch will take care of you when you get there." She then
+asked, "Were those men calling after you?" I told her I
+supposed they were, when she replied, with a peculiar
+smile, "I guess you can't be a very nice kind of girl,
+or you wouldn't be on the street this time of night." My
+feelings were so deeply wounded I could hardly restrain
+my tears at this cruel insinuation; but pride came to my
+aid, and, choking down the rising emotion, I replied as
+carelessly as possible, "I must do as I can, and not as
+I would."
+
+It was about one o'clock at night when I entered the
+principal street in Albany, and, as the lady predicted,
+a watchman came to me and asked why I was out that time
+of night. I gave him Mr. Stot's letter. He stood beside
+a lamp-post and read it, when he seemed satisfied, and
+said, "I know the man; come with me and I'll take you to
+his house." I followed him a long way, till at last he
+stopped before a large house, and rang the bell. Mr.
+Williams came to the door, and asked what was wanted.
+The watchman gave him the letter. He read it, and invited
+me to stop. His wife got up, received me very kindly,
+and gave me some supper, for which I was truly grateful.
+Nor was I less thankful for the delicate consideration
+with which they avoided any allusion to my convent life,
+or my subsequent flight and suffering. Mrs. Williams
+saw that I was sad and weary, and as she conducted me to
+a comfortable bed, she remarked, "You are safe at last,
+and I am glad of it. You can now retire without the
+apprehension of danger, and sleep in perfect security.
+You are with friends who will protect you as long as you
+choose to remain with us."
+
+Notwithstanding the good lady's assurance of safety, I
+found it impossible to close my eyes. I was among strangers,
+in a strange place, and, having been so often deceived,
+might I not be again? Perhaps, after all their pretended
+kindness, they were plotting to betray me. A few days,
+however, convinced me that I had at last found real
+friends, who would protect me in the hour of danger to
+the utmost of their ability.
+
+I remained here some four weeks, and should
+have remained longer, but an incident transpired
+that awakened all my fears, and again sent me
+forth into the wide world, a fugitive, and a wanderer.
+I went to my chamber one night, when I
+heard a sound like the full, heavy respiration of a
+man in deep sleep. The sound appeared to come
+from under the bed, but stopped as I entered the
+room. I was very much alarmed, but I controlled
+my feelings, and instead of running shrieking
+from the room, I deliberately closed the blinds, shut
+the windows, adjusted the curtain, all the time
+carelessly humming a tune, and taking up my
+lamp I slowly left the room. Once outside the
+door, I ran in all haste to Mr. Williams, and told
+him what I had heard. He laughed at me, said it
+was all imagination, but, to quiet my fears, he
+went to my room resolved to convince me that no
+one was there. I followed, and stood at the door
+while he lifted the bed valance, when a large, tall
+man sprang forth, and caught him with one hand
+while with the other he drew a pistol from beneath
+his coat saying, "Let me go, and I'll depart in
+peace; but attempt to detain me, and I'll blow
+your brains out." I shrieked, and Mrs. Williams
+came in great terror and consternation, to see what
+was the matter. But she could render no assistance,
+and Mr. Williams, being unarmed, was
+obliged to let him go. The watch were immediately
+called, and they sought for the intruder in
+every direction. No effort was spared to find him,
+that we might, at least, learn the object of this
+untimely visit. But the search was all in vain.
+No trace of his whereabouts could be discovered.
+
+Mr. Williams said he did not believe it was me he sought.
+He thought the object was robbery, and perhaps arson and
+murder, but he would not think that I was in the least
+danger. "The man," he said, "in hastily concealing himself
+had taken the first hiding place he could find." Yet I
+thought otherwise. Indeed, so sure was I that he was an
+agent of the priests, sent forth for the express purpose
+of arresting me, no earthly consideration would have
+induced me to remain there another day. The rest of that
+night I spent in a state of anxiety I cannot describe.
+Sleep fled from my eyes. I dared not even undress and go
+to bed, but I sat in my chair, or walked the room every
+moment expecting the return of the mysterious visitor.
+I shuddered at every sound, whether real or imaginary.
+Once in particular, I remember, the distant roll of
+carriage wheels fell upon my ear. I listened; it came
+near, and still nearer, till at last it stopped, as I
+thought, at the gate. For a moment I stood literally
+stupified with terror, and then I hastily prepared to
+use the means for self destruction I had already provided
+in anticipation of such an emergency. I was still resolved
+never to be taken alive. "Give me liberty or give me
+death," was now the language of my soul. If I could not
+enjoy the one, I would cordially embrace the other. But
+it was a sad alternative after all I had suffered that
+I might be free, after all my buoyant hopes, all my ardent
+aspirations for a better life. O, it was a bitter thing,
+thus to stand in the darkness of night, and with my own
+hand carefully adjust the cord that was to cut me off
+from the land of the living, and in a moment launch my
+trembling soul into the vast, unknown, untried, and
+fearful future, that men call eternity! Was this to be
+the only use I was to make of liberty? Was it for this
+I had so long struggled, toiled, wept and prayed? "God
+of mercy," I cried, "save, O save me from this last great
+sin! From the sad and dire necessity which thus urges me
+to cut short a life which thou alone canst give!" My
+prayer was heard; but how slowly passed the hours of that
+weary night while I waited for the day that I might
+"hasten my escape from the windy storm and tempest."
+Truly, at that time I could say with one of old,
+"Fearfulness and trembling are come upon me, and horror
+hath overwhelmed me. My heart is sore pained within me,
+and the terrors of death are fallen upon me. Oh that I
+had the wings of a dove, for then would I flee away, and
+be at rest."
+
+But alas! I had not the wings of a dove, and whither
+should I flee from the furious grasp of my relentless
+persecutors? Again I must go forth into the "busy haunts
+of men," I must mingle with the multitude, and what chance
+had I for ultimate escape? If I left these kind friends,
+and leave them I must, who would take me in? In whom
+could I confide? Who would have the power to rescue me
+in my hour of need? In God alone could I trust, yet why
+is he so far from helping me? Why are my prayers so long
+unanswered? And why does he thus allow the wicked to
+triumph; to lay snares for the feet of the innocent, and
+wrongfully persecute those whom their wanton cruelty hath
+caused to sit in darkness and in the shadow of death?
+Why does he not at once "break the bands of iron, and
+let the oppressed go free?"
+
+The tedious night at length passed away. When I met Mr.
+Williams in the morning, I told him I could no longer
+remain with him, for I was sure if I did, I should be
+suddenly arrested in some unguarded moment, and carried
+back to Montreal. He urged me to stay, assured me he
+would never allow them to take me, said that he thought
+some of going south, and I could go with him, and thus
+be removed far from all whom I feared. Mrs. Williams,
+also, strove to persuade me to stay. But, though sorry
+to appear ungrateful, I dared not remain another night
+where I felt that my danger was so great.
+
+When they found that I was determined to go, Mr. Williams
+said I had better go to Worcester, Mass., and try to get
+employment in some farmer's family, a little out of the
+city. He gave me money to bear my expenses, until I found
+a place where I could earn my living. It was with a sad
+heart that I left this hospitable roof, and as I turned
+away I said in my heart, "Shall I always be hunted through
+the world in this manner, obliged to flee like a guilty
+thing, and shall I never find a home of happiness and
+peace? Must sorrow and despair forever be the portion of
+my cup?" But no words of mine can describe what I felt
+at that moment. I longed for the power to sound a warning
+through the length and breadth of the land, to cry in
+the ears of all the people, "Beware of Romanism!" Like
+the patient man of Uz, with whose history I have since
+become familiar, I was ready to exclaim, "O that my words
+were now written! O that they were printed in a book!
+Graven with an iron pen," that the whole world might know
+what a fearful and bitter thing it is to be a nun! To
+be subject to the control of those ruthless tyrants, the
+Romish Priests.
+
+Once more I entered the depot, and mingled with the crowd
+around the ticket office. But no pen can describe my
+terror when I found myself the object of particular
+attention. I heard people remark about my strange and
+unnatural appearance, and I feared I might be taken up
+for a crazy person, if not for a nun. Thinking that I
+saw an enemy in every face, and a pursuer in every one
+who came near me, I hastened to take refuge in the cars.
+There I waited with the greatest impatience for the
+starting of the train. Slowly the cars were filled; very
+leisurely the passengers sought their seats, while I sat
+trembling in every limb, and the cold perspiration starting
+from every pore. How carefully I scanned every face! how
+eagerly I watched for some indication of the priest or
+the spy! So intense was my anxiety, those few moments
+seemed to me an age of agony. At length the shrill whistle
+announced that all was ready, and like sweetest music
+the sound fell upon my ears. The train dashed off at
+lightning speed, but to me it seemed like the movement
+of a snail.
+
+Once under way, I ventured to breathe freely, and hope
+again revived. Perchance I might yet escape. But even as
+the thought passed my mind, a man entered the cars and
+seated himself directly, before me. I thought he regarded
+me with too much interest, and thinking to shun him, I
+quietly left my seat and retired to the other end of the
+car. He soon followed, and again my fears revived. He
+at first tried to converse with me, but finding I would
+not reply, he began to question me in the most direct
+and impertinent manner. Again I changed my seat, and
+again he followed. I then sought the conductor, and
+revealed to him enough of my history to enlist his sympathy
+and ensure his protection. To his honor be it spoken, I
+did not appeal to him in vain. He severely reproved the
+man for his impertinence; and for the rest of the journey
+I was shielded from insult or injury.
+
+Nothing further of interest transpired until I reached
+Worcester, when the first face that met my eye as I was
+about to leave the cars was that of a Romish priest. I
+could not be mistaken, for I had often seen him at
+Montreal. He might not have been looking for me, but he
+watched every passenger as they left the cars in a way
+that convinced me he had some special reason for doing
+it. As I, too, had special reasons for avoiding him just
+at that time, I stepped back out of sight until the
+passengers were all out of the cars and the priest had
+turned away. I then sprang out upon the opposite side,
+and, turning my back upon the depot, hastened away amid
+the wilderness of houses, not knowing whither I went.
+For a long time I wandered around, until at length, being
+faint and weary, I began to look for some place where I
+could obtain refreshment. But when I found a restaurant
+I did not dare to enter. A number of Irishmen were standing
+around who were in all probability Catholics. I would
+not venture among them; but as I turned aside I remembered
+that Mr. Williams had directed me to seek employment a
+little out of the city. I then inquired the way to Main
+street, and having found it, I turned to the north and
+walked on till I found myself out of the thickly settled
+part of the city. Then I began to seek for employment,
+and after several fruitless applications I chanced to
+call upon a man whose name was Handy. He received me in
+the kindest manner, and when I asked for work, he said
+his wife did not need to hire me, but I was welcome to
+stop with them and work for my board until I found
+employment elsewhere. This offer I joyfully accepted;
+and, as I became acquainted in the place, many kind hands
+were extended to aid me in my efforts to obtain an honest
+living. In this neighborhood I still reside, truly
+thankful for past deliverance, grateful for present
+mercies, and confidently trusting God for the future.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVI.
+
+CONCLUSION.
+
+Here closes the history of Sarah J. Richardson, as related
+by herself. The remaining particulars have been obtained
+from her employers in Worcester.
+
+She arrived in this city August, 1854, and, as she has
+already stated, at once commenced seeking for employment.
+She called at many houses before she found any one who
+wished for help; and her first question at each place
+was, "Are you a Catholic?" If the answer was in the
+affirmative, she passed on, but if the family were
+Protestants, she inquired for some kind of employment.
+She did not care what it was; she would cook, wash, sew,
+or do chamber-work--anything to earn her bread. A Mr.
+Handy was the first person who took her in, and gave her
+a home. In his family she worked for her board a few
+weeks, going out to wash occasionally as she had
+opportunity. She then went to Holden Mass., but for some
+reason remained only one week, and again returned to
+Worcester.
+
+Mr. Ezra Goddard then took her into his own family, and
+found her capable, industrious, and trustworthy. Had
+anything been wanting to prove her truthfulness and
+sincerity, the deep gratitude of her fervent "I thank
+you," when told that she had found a permanent home,
+would have done it effectually. But though her whole
+appearance indicated contentment and earnestness of
+purpose, though her various duties were faithfully and
+zealously performed, yet the deep sadness of her
+countenance, and the evident anxiety of her mind at first
+awakened a suspicion of mental derangement. She seemed
+restless, suspicious, and morbidly apprehensive of
+approaching danger. The appearance of a stranger, or a
+sudden ringing of the bell, would cause her to start,
+tremble, and exhibit the greatest perturbation of spirit.
+In fact, she seemed so constantly on the qui vive, the
+lady of the house one day said to her, "Sarah, what is
+the matter with you? what do you fear?" "The Roman Catholic
+priests," she replied. "I have been a nun. I ran away
+from the Grey Nunnery at Montreal, and twice I have been
+caught, carried back, and punished in the most cruel
+manner. O, if you knew what I have suffered, you would
+not wonder that I live in constant fear lest they again
+seek out my retreat; and I will die before I go back
+again."
+
+Further questioning drew from her the foregoing narrative,
+which she repeated once and again to various persons,
+and at different times, without the least alteration or
+contradiction. She resided in the family of Mr. Goddard
+some weeks, when she was taken into the employ of Mr.
+Amos L. Black.
+
+This gentleman informs us that he found her a faithful,
+industrious, honest servant, and he has not the least
+doubt of the truthfulness of her statements respecting
+her former life in the Convent.
+
+A few weeks after this, she was married to Frederick S.
+Richardson with whom she became acquainted soon after
+her arrival in the city of Worcester. The marriage ceremony
+was performed by Charles Chaffin, Esq., of Holden, Mass.
+After their marriage, her husband hired a room in the
+house occupied by Mr. Handy with whom she had formerly
+resided. After a few weeks, however, they removed to a
+place called the Drury farm. It is owned by the heirs,
+but left in the care of Mr. Ezra Goddard.
+
+Previous to her marriage, Mrs. Richardson had often been
+advised to allow her history to be placed before the
+public. But she always replied, "For my life I would not
+do it. Not because I do not wish the world to know it,
+for I would gladly proclaim it wherever a Romanist is
+known, but it would be impossible for me to escape their
+hands should I make myself so public. They would most
+assuredly take my life." After her marriage, however,
+her principal objection was removed. She thought they
+would not wish to take her back into the nunnery, and
+her husband would protect her from violence. She therefore
+related the story of her life while in the convent, which,
+in accordance with her own request, was written down from
+her lips as she related it. This was done by Mrs. Lucy
+Ann Hood, wife of Edward P. Hood, and daughter of Ezra
+Goddard. It is now given to the public without addition
+or alteration, and with but a slight abridgment. A strange
+and startling story it certainly is. Perhaps the reader
+will cast it aside at once as a worthless fiction,--the
+idle vagary of an excited brain. The compiler, of course,
+cannot vouch for its truth, but would respectfully invite
+the attention of the reader to the following testimonials
+presented by those who have known the narrator. The first
+is from Edward P. Hood, with whom Mrs. Richardson resided
+when her narrative was written.
+
+
+
+(TESTIMONY OF EDWARD P. HOOD.)
+
+To all whom it may concern. I hereby certify that I was
+personally acquainted with Sarah J. Richards, now Sarah
+J. Richardson, at the time she resided in Worcester,
+Mass. I first saw her at the house of Mr. Ezra Goddard,
+where she came seeking employment. She appeared anxious
+to get some kind of work, was willing to do anything to
+earn an honest living. She had the appearance of a person
+who had seen much suffering and hardship. She worked for
+Mr. Goddard a short time, when she obtained another place.
+She then left, but called very often; and during her stay
+in Worcester, she worked there several times. So far as
+I was able to judge of her character, I do not hesitate
+to say that she was a woman of truth and honesty. I
+heard her relate the account of her life and sufferings
+in the Grey Nunnery, and her final escape. I knew when
+the story was written, and can testify to its being done
+according to her own dictation. I have examined the
+manuscript, and can say that it a written out truly and
+faithfully as related by the nun herself.
+
+EDWARD P. HOOD.
+
+Worcester, May 5, 1856.
+
+
+
+(TESTIMONY OF EZRA GODDARD.)
+
+I first became acquainted with Sarah J. Richardson in
+August 1854. She came to my house to work for my wife.
+She was at my house a great many times after that until
+March 1855, when she left Worcester. At one time she was
+there four or five weeks in succession. She was
+industrious, willing to do anything to get an honest
+living. She was kind in her disposition, and honest in
+her dealings. I have no hesitation in saying that I think
+her statements can be relied upon.
+
+EZRA GODDARD.
+
+Worcester, Jan. 21, 1856.
+
+
+
+(TESTIMONY OF LUCY GODDARD.)
+
+I am acquainted with the above named Sarah J. Richardson,
+and can fully testify to the truth of the above statements
+as to her kindness and industrious habits, honesty and
+truthfulness.
+
+LUCY GODDARD.
+
+Worcester, Jan. 21, 1856.
+
+
+
+(TESTIMONY OF JOSIAH GODDARD.)
+
+To whom it may concern: This is to testify that I am
+acquainted with Sarah J. Richardson, formerly Sarah J.
+Richards. I became acquainted with her in the fall of
+1854. She worked at my father's at the time. I heard her
+tell her story, and from what I saw of her while she was
+in Worcester, I have no hesitation in saying that she
+was a woman of truth and honesty.
+
+JOSIAH GODDARD.
+
+Worcester, March 1, 1856.
+
+
+
+(TESTIMONY OF EBEN JEWETT.)
+
+I became acquainted with Sarah J. Richardson last winter,
+at the house of Mr. Ezra Goddard; saw her a number of
+times after that, at the place where I boarded. She did
+some work for my wife, and I heard her speak of being at
+the Grey Nunnery. I also heard her story, from Mr.
+Goddard's family. I have no doubt of her being honest
+and truthful, and I believe she is so considered by all
+who became acquainted with her.
+
+EBEN JEWETT.
+
+Worcester, Feb., 1856.
+
+
+
+(TESTIMONY OF CHARLES CHAFFIN.)
+
+Worcester, ss.--Holden, Nov. 11, 1854.
+
+This certifies that I this day united in marriage,
+Frederick S. Richardson and Sarah J. Richards, both of
+Worcester.
+
+CHARLES CHAFFIN, Justice of the Peace.
+
+
+
+(AFFIDAVIT.)
+
+I, Sarah J. Richardson, wife of Frederick S. Richardson,
+of the city of Worcester, County of Worcester, and
+Commonwealth of Massachusetts, formerly Sarah J. Richards
+before marriage, do solemnly swear, declare and say, that
+the foregoing pages contain a true and faithful history
+of my life before my marriage to the said Frederick S.
+Richardson, and that every statement made herein by me
+is true. In witness whereof, I do hereunto set my hand
+and seal, this 13th day of March, A.D. 1855.
+
+SARAH J. RICHARDSON (X her mark.)
+
+In presence of WM. GREENLEAF.
+
+Sworn to before me, the 13th day of March, AD. 1855.
+
+WM. GREENLEAF, Justice of the Peace.
+
+
+
+(TESTIMONY OF Z. K. PANGBORN.)
+
+When it was known that the Narrative of Sarah J. Richardson
+was about to be published, Mr. Z. K. Pangborn, at that
+time editor of the Worcester Daily Transcript, voluntarily
+offered the following testimony which we copy from one
+of his editorials.
+
+"We have no doubt that the nun here spoken of as one who
+escaped from the Grey Nunnery at Montreal, is the same
+person who spent some weeks in our family in the fall of
+1853, after her first escape from the Nunnery. She came
+in search of employment to our house in St. Albans, Vt.,
+stating that she had traveled on foot from Montreal, and
+her appearance indicated that she was poor, and had seen
+hardship. She obtained work at sewing, her health not
+being sufficient for more arduous task. She appeared to
+be suffering under some severe mental trial, and though
+industrious and lady-like in her deportment, still appeared
+absent minded, and occasionally singular in her manner.
+After awhile she revealed the fact to the lady of the
+house, that she had escaped from the Grey Nunnery at
+Montreal, but begged her not to inform any one of the
+fact, as she feared, if it should be known, that she
+would be retaken, and carried back. A few days after
+making this disclosure, she suddenly disappeared. Having
+gone out one evening, and failing to return, much inquiry
+was made, but no trace of her was obtained for some
+months. Last spring a gentleman from Worcester, Mass.
+called on us to make inquiries in regard to this same
+person and gave us the following account of her as given
+by herself. She states that on the evening when she so
+mysteriously disappeared from our house, she called upon
+an Irish family whose acquaintance she had formed, and
+when she was coming away, was suddenly seized, gagged,
+and thrust into a close carriage, or box, as she thought,
+and on the evening of the next day found herself once
+more consigned to the tender mercies of the Grey Nunnery
+in Montreal. Her capture was effected by a priest who
+tracked her to St. Albans, and watched his opportunity
+to seize her. She was subjected to the most rigorous and
+cruel treatment, to punish her for running away, and kept
+in close confinement till she feigned penitence and
+submission, when she was treated less cruelly, and allowed
+more liberty.
+
+"But the difficulties in the way of an escape, only
+stimulated her the more to make the attempt, and she
+finally succeeded a second time in getting out of that
+place which she described as a den of cruelty and misery.
+She was successful also in eluding her pursuers, and in
+reaching this city, (Worcester,) where she remained some
+time, seeking to avoid notoriety, as she feared she might
+be again betrayed and captured. She is now, however, in
+a position where she does not fear the priests, and
+proposes to give to the world a history of her life in
+the Nunnery. The disclosures she makes are of the most
+startling character, but of her veracity and good character
+we have the most satisfactory evidence."
+
+This statement was confirmed by Mrs. Pangborn, a sister
+of the late Mrs Branard, the lady with whom Sarah J.
+Richardson stopped in St. Albans, and by whom she was
+employed as a seamstress. Being an inmate of the family
+at the time, Mrs Pangborn states that she had every
+opportunity to become acquainted with the girl and learn
+her true character. The family, she says, were all
+interested in her, although they knew nothing of her
+secret, until a few days before she left. She speaks of
+her as being "quiet and thoughtful, diligent, faithful
+and anxious to please, but manifesting an eager desire
+for learning, that she might be able to acquaint herself
+more perfectly with the Holy Scriptures. She could, at
+that time, read a little, and her mind was well stored
+with select passages from the sacred volume, which she
+seemed to take great delight in repeating. She was able
+to converse intelligently upon almost any subject, and
+never seemed at a loss for language to express her
+thoughts. No one could doubt that nature had given her
+a mind capable of a high degree of religious and
+intellectual culture, and that, with the opportunity for
+improvement, she would become a useful member of society.
+Of book knowledge she was certainly quite ignorant, but
+she had evidently studied human nature to some good
+purpose." Mrs Pangborn also corroborates many of the
+statements in her narrative. She often visited the Grey
+Nunnery, and says that the description given of the
+building, the Academy, the Orphan's Home, and young ladies
+school, are all correct. The young Smalley mentioned in
+the narrative was well known to her, and also his sister
+"little Sissy Smalley," as they used to call her.
+Inquiries have been made of those acquainted with the
+route along which the fugitive passed in her hasty flight,
+and we are told that the description is in general correct;
+that even the mistakes serve to prove the truthfulness
+of the narrator, being such as a person would be likely
+to make when describing from memory scenes and places
+they had seen but once; whereas, if they were getting up
+a fiction which they designed to represent as truth, such
+mistakes would be carefully avoided.
+
+
+
+
+APPENDIX I.
+
+ABSURDITIES OF ROMANISTS.
+
+It may perchance be thought by some persons that the
+foregoing narrative contains many things too absurd and
+childish for belief. "What rational man," it may be said,
+"would ever think of dressing up a figure to represent
+the devil, for the purpose of frightening young girls
+into obedience? And those absurd threats! Surely no sane
+man, and certainly no Christian teacher, would ever stoop
+to such senseless mummery!"
+
+Incredible it may seem--foolish, false, inconsistent with
+reason, or the plain dictates of common sense, it certainly
+is--but we have before us well-authenticated accounts of
+transactions in which the Romish priests claimed powers
+quite as extraordinary, and palmed off upon a credulous,
+superstitious people stories quite as silly and ridiculous
+as anything recorded in these pages. Indeed, so barefaced
+and shameless were their pretensions in some instances,
+that even their better-informed brethren were ashamed of
+their folly, and their own archbishop publicly rebuked
+their dishonesty, cupidity and chicanery. In proof of
+this we place before our readers the following facts
+which we find in a letter from Professor Similien, of
+the college of Angers, addressed to the Union de l'Ouest:
+
+"Some years ago a pretended miracle was reported as
+having occurred upon a mountain called La Salette, in
+the southeastern part of France, where the Virgin Mary
+appeared in a very miraculous manner to two young shepherds.
+The story, however, was soon proved to be a despicable
+trick of the priest, and as such was publicly exposed.
+But the Bishop of Lucon, within whose diocese the sacred
+mountain stands, appears to have been unwilling to
+relinquish the advantage which he expected to result from
+a wide-spread belief in this infamous fable. Accordingly,
+in July, 1852, it was again reported that no less than
+three miracles were wrought there by the Holy Virgin.
+The details were as follows:
+
+"A young pupil at the religious establishment of the
+visitation of Valence, who had been for three months
+completely blind from an attack of gutta-serena, arrived
+at La Salette on the first of July, in company with some
+sisters of the community. The extreme fatigue which she
+had undergone in order to reach the summit of the mountain,
+at the place of the apparition, caused some anxiety to
+be felt that she could not remain fasting until the
+conclusion of the mass, which had not yet commenced, and
+the Abbe Sibilla, one of the missionaries of La Salette,
+was requested to administer the sacrament to her before
+the service began. She had scarcely received the sacred
+wafer, when, impelled by a sudden inspiration, she raised
+her head and exclaimed, 'ma bonne mere, je vous vois.'
+She had, in fact, her eyes fixed on the statue of the
+Virgin, which she saw as clearly as any one present For
+more than an hour she remained plunged in an ecstasy of
+gratitude and love, and afterward retired from the place
+without requiring the assistance of those who accompanied
+her. At the same moment a woman from Gap, nearly sixty
+years of age, who for the last nineteen years had not
+had the use of her right arm, in consequence of a
+dislocation, suddenly felt it restored to its original
+state, and swinging round the once paralyzed limb, she
+exclaimed, in a transport of joy and gratitude, 'And I
+also am cured!' A third cure, although not instantaneous,
+is not the less striking. Another woman, known in the
+country for years as being paralytic, could not ascend
+the mountain but with the greatest difficulty, and with
+the aid of crutches. On the first day of the neuvane,
+that of her arrival, she felt a sensation as if life was
+coming into her legs, which had been for so long tune
+dead. This feeling went on increasing, and the last day
+of the neuvane, after having received the communion, she
+went, without any assistance, to the cross of the
+assumption, where she hung up her crutches. She also was
+cured.
+
+"Bishop Lucon must have known that this was mere imposition;
+yet, so far from exposing a fraud so base, he not only
+permits his people to believe it, but he lends his whole
+influence to support and circulate the falsehood. And
+why? Ah! a church was to be erected; and it was necessary
+to get up a little enthusiasm among the people in order
+to induce them to fill his exhausted coffers, and build
+the church. In proof of this, we have only to quote a
+few extracts from the 'Pastoral' which he issued on this
+occasion.
+
+"'And now," he says, "Mary has deigned to appear on the
+summit of a lofty mountain to two young shepherds,
+revealing to them the secrets of heaven. But who attests
+the truth of the narrative of these Alpine pastors? No
+other than the men themselves, and they are believed.
+They declare what they have seen, they repeat what they
+have heard, they retain what they have received commandment
+to keep secret.
+
+"A few words of the incomparable Mother of God have
+transformed them into new men. Incapable of concerting
+aught between themselves, or of imagining anything similar
+to what they relate, each is the witness to a vision
+which has not found him unbelieving; each is its historian.
+These two shepherds, dull as they were, have at once
+understood and received the lesson which was vouchsafed
+to them, and it is ineffaceably engraven on their hearts.
+They add nothing to it, they take nothing from it, they
+modify it in nowise, they deliver the oracle of Heaven
+just as they have received it.
+
+"An admirable constancy enabled them to guard the secret,
+a singular sagacity made them discern all the snares laid
+for them, a rare prudence suggested to them a thousand
+responses, not one of which betrayed their secret; and
+when at length the time came when it was their duty to
+make it known to the common Father of the Faithful, they
+wrote correctly, as if reading a book placed under their
+eyes. Their recital drew to this blessed mountain thousands
+of pilgrims.
+
+"They proclaimed that 'on Saturday, the 19th of September,
+1846, Mary manifested herself to them; and the anniversary
+of this glorious day is henceforth and forever dear to
+Christian piety. Will not every pilgrim who repairs to
+this holy mountain add his testimony to the truthfulness
+of these young shepherds? Mary halted near a fountain;
+she communicated to it a celestial virtue, a divine
+efficacy. From being intermittent, this spring, today so
+celebrated, became perennial.
+
+"'Every where is recounted the prodigies which she works.
+When the afflicted are in despair, the infirm without
+remedy, they resort to the waters of La Salette, and
+cures are wrought by this remedy, whose power makes itself
+felt against every evil. Our diocess, so devoted to Mary,
+has been no stranger to the bounty of this tender Mother.
+We are about to celebrate shortly the sixth anniversary
+of this miraculous apparition. NOW THAT A SANCTUARY IS
+TO BE RAISED on this holy mountain to the glory of God,
+we have thought it right to inform you thereof.
+
+"'We cannot doubt that many of you have been heard by
+our Lady of La Salette; you desire to witness your
+gratitude to this mother of compassion; you would gladly
+BRING YOUR STONE to the beautiful edifice that is to be
+constructed. WE DESIRE TO FURTHER YOUR FILIAL TENDERNESS
+WITH THE MEANS OF TRANSMITTING THE ALMS OF FAITH AND
+PIETY. For these reasons, invoking the holy name of God,
+we have ordained and do ordain as follows, viz.:
+
+"'First, we permit the appearance of our Lady of La
+Salette to be preached throughout our diocess; secondly,
+on Sunday, the 19th of September next ensuing, the litanies
+of the Holy Virgin shall be chanted in all the chapels
+and churches of the diocess, and be followed by the
+benediction of the Holy Sacrament. Thirdly, THE FAITHFUL
+WHO MAY DESIRE TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE ERECTION OF THE NEW
+SANCTUARY, MAY DEPOSIT THEIR OFFERINGS IN THE HANDS OF
+THE CURE, WHO WILL TRANSMIT THEM TO US FOR THE BISHOP OF
+GRENOBLE.
+
+"'Our present pastoral letter shall be read and published
+after mass in every parish on the Sunday after its
+reception.
+
+"'Given at Lucon, in our Episcopal palace, under our
+sign-manual and the seal of our arms, and the official
+counter-signature of our secretary, the 30th of June, of
+the year of Grace, 1852.
+
+"'X Jac-Mar Jos,
+"'Bishop of Lucon.'"
+
+"It is not a little remarkable," says the editor of the
+American Christian Union, "that whilst the Bishop of
+Lucon was engaged in extolling the miracles of La Salette,
+the Cardinal Archbishop of Lyons, Dr. Bonald, 'Primate
+of all the Gauls,' addressed a circular to all the priests
+in his diocese, in which he cautions them against apocryphal
+miracles! There is indubitable evidence that his grace
+refers to the scandalous delusions of La Salette. His
+language is severe, very severe. He attributes the miracles
+in question to pecuniary speculation, which now-a-days,
+he says, mingles with everything, seizes upon imaginary
+facts, and profits by it at the expense of the credulous!
+He charges the authors of these things with being GREEDY
+MEN, who aim at procuring for themselves DISHONEST GAINS
+by this traffic in superstitious objects! And he forbids
+the publishing from the pulpit, without leave, of any
+account of a miracle, even though its authenticity should
+be attested by another Bishop! This is good. His grace
+deserves credit for setting his face against this miserable
+business, of palming off false miracles upon the people."
+
+[Footnote: Since the above was written, we have met with
+the following explanation of this modern miracle:
+
+"A few years ago there was a great stir among 'the simple
+faithful' in France, occasioned by a well-credited
+apparition of the Holy Virgin at La Salette. She required
+the erection of a chapel in her honor at that place, and
+made such promises of special indulgences to all who paid
+their devotions there, that it became 'all the rage' as
+a place of pilgrimage. The consequence was, that other
+shops for the same sort of wares in that region lost most
+of their customers, and the good priests who tended the
+tills were sorely impoverished. In self-defence, they,
+WELL KNOWING HOW SUCH THINGS WERE GOT UP, exposed the
+trick. A prelate publicly denounced the imposture, and
+an Abbe Deleon, priest in the diocess of Grenoble, printed
+a work called 'La Salette a Valley of Lies.' In this
+publication it was maintained, with proofs, that the hoax
+was gotten up by a Mademoiselle de Lamerliere, a sort of
+half-crazy nun, who impersonated the character of the
+Virgin. For the injury done to her character by this book
+she sued the priest for damages to the tone of twenty
+thousand francs, demanding also the infliction of the
+utmost penalty of the law. The court, after a long and
+careful investigation, for two days, as we learn by the
+Catholic Herald, disposed of the case by declaring the
+miracle-working damsel non-suited, and condemning her to
+pay the expenses of the prosecution."--American and
+Foreign Christian Union.]
+
+Another of Rome's marvellous stories we copy from the
+New York Daily Times of July 3d, 1854. It is from the
+pen of a correspondent at Rome, who, after giving an
+account of the ceremony performed in the church of St.
+Peters at the canonization of a NEW SAINT, under the name
+of Germana, relates the following particulars of her
+history. He says, "I take the facts as they are related
+in a pamphlet account of her 'life, virtues, and miracles,'
+published by authority at Rome:
+
+"Germana Consin was born near the village of Pibrac, in
+the diocess of Toulouse, in France. Maimed in one hand,
+and of a scrofulous constitution, she excited the hatred
+of her step-mother, in whose power her father's second
+marriage placed her while yet a child. This cruel woman
+gave the little Germana no other bed than some vine twigs,
+lying under a flight of stairs, which galled her limbs,
+wearied with the day's labor. She also persuaded her
+husband to send the little girl to tend sheep in the
+plains, exposed to all extremes of weather. Injuries and
+abuse were her only welcome when she returned from her
+day's task to her home. To these injuries she submitted
+with Christian meekness and patience, and she derived
+her happiness and consolation from religious faith. She
+went every day to church to hear mass, disregarding the
+distance, the difficulty of the journey, and the danger
+in which she left her flock. The neighboring forest was
+full of wolves, who devoured great numbers from other
+flocks, but never touched a sheep in that of Germana. To
+go to the church she was obliged to cross a little river,
+which was often flooded, but she passed with dry feet;
+the waters flowing away from her on either side: howbeit
+no one else dared to attempt the passage. Whenever the
+signal sounded for the Ave Marie, wherever she might be
+in conducting her sheep, even if in a ditch, or in mud
+or mire, she kneeled down and offered her devotions to
+the Queen of Heaven, nor were her garments wet or soiled.
+The little children whom she met in the fields she
+instructed in the truths of religion. For the poor she
+felt the tenderest charity, and robbed herself of her
+scanty pittance of bread to feed them. One day her
+step-mother, suspecting that she was carrying away from
+the house morsels of bread to be thus distributed, incited
+her husband to look in her apron; he did so, BUT FOUND
+IT FULL OF FLOWERS, BEAUTIFUL BUT OUT OF SEASON, INSTEAD
+OF BREAD. This miraculous conversion of bread into
+flowers formed the subject of one of the paintings
+exhibited in St. Peter's at the Beatification. Industrious,
+charitable, patient and forgiving, Germana lived a
+memorable example of piety till she passed from earth in
+the twenty second year of her age. The night of her death
+two holy monks were passing, on a journey, in the
+neighborhood of her house. Late at night they saw two
+celestial virgins robed in white on the road that led to
+her habitation; a few minutes afterwards they returned
+leading between them another virgin clad in pure white,
+and with a crown of flowers on her head.
+
+"Wonders did not cease with her death. Forty years after
+this event her body was uncovered, in digging a grave
+for another person, and found entirely uncorrupted--nay,
+the blood flowed from a wound accidentally made in her
+face. Great crowds assembled to see the body so miraculously
+preserved, and it was carefully re-interred within the
+church. There it lay in place until the French Revolution,
+when it was pulled up and cast into a ditch and covered
+with quick lime and water. But even this failed to injure
+the body of the blessed saint. It was found two years
+afterward entirely unhurt, and even the grave clothes
+which surrounded it were entire, as on the day of sepulture,
+two hundred years before.
+
+"And now in the middle of the nineteenth century, these
+facts are published for the edification of believers,
+and his Holiness has set his seal to their authenticity.
+Four miracles performed by this saint after her death
+are attested by the bull of beatification, and also by
+Latin inscriptions in great letters displayed at St.
+Peter's on the day of this great celebration. The monks
+of the monastery at Bourges, in France, prayed her to
+intercede on one occasion, that their store of bread
+might be multiplied; on another their store of meal; on
+both occasions THEIR PRAYER WAS GRANTED. The other two
+miracles were cures of desperate maladies, the diseased
+persons having been brought to pray over her tomb.
+
+"On the splendid scarlet hangings, bearing the arms of
+Pius IX. and suspended at the corners of the nave and
+transept, were two Latin inscriptions, of similar purport,
+of one of which I give a translation: 'O Germana, raised
+to-day to celestial honors by Pius IX. Pontifex Maximus,
+since thou knowest that Pius has wept over thy nation
+wandering from God, and has exultingly rejoiced at its
+reconciling itself with God little by little, he prays
+thee intimately united with God, do thou, for thou canst
+do it, make known his wishes to God, and strengthen them,
+for thou art able, with the virtue of thy prayers.'
+
+"I have been thus minute in my account of this
+Beatification, deeming the facts I state of no little
+importance and interest, as casting light upon the
+character of the Catholicism of the present day, and
+showing with what matters the Spiritual and Temporal
+ruler of Rome is busying himself in this year of our Lord
+eighteen hundred and fifty-four."
+
+Many other examples similar to the above might be given
+from the history of Catholicism as it exists at the
+present time in the old world. But let us turn to our
+own country. We need not look to France or Rome for
+examples of priestly intrigue of the basest kind; and
+absurdities that almost surpass belief. The following
+account which we copy from The American and Foreign
+Christian Union of August, 1852, will serve to show that
+the priests in these United States are quite as willing
+to impose upon the ignorant and credulous as, their
+brethren in other countries. The article is from the pen
+of an Irish Missionary in the employ of The American and
+Foreign Christian Union and is entitled,
+
+   "A LYING WONDER."
+
+"It would seem almost incredible," says the editor of
+this valuable Magazine, "that any men could be found in
+this country who are capable of practising such wretched
+deceptions. But the account given in the subjoined
+statement is too well authenticated to permit us to reject
+the story as untrue, however improbable it may, at first
+sight, seem to be. Here it is:--?
+
+"Mr. Editor,--I give you, herein, some information
+respecting a lying wonder wrought in Troy, New York, last
+winter, and respecting the female who was the 'MEDIUM'
+of it. I have come to the conclusion that this female is
+a Jesuit, after as good an examination as I have been
+able to give the matter. I have been fed with these lying
+wonders in early life, and in Ireland as well as in this
+country there are many who, for want of knowing any
+better, will feed upon them in their hearts by faith and
+thanksgiving. About the time this lying wonder of which
+I am about to write happened, I had been talking of it
+in the office of Mr. Luther, of Albany, (coal merchant),
+where were a number of Irish waiting for a job. One of
+these men declared, with many curses on his soul if what
+he told was not true, that he had seen a devil cast out
+of a woman in his own parish, in Ireland, by the priest.
+I told him it would be better for his character's sake
+for him to say he heard of it, than to say he SAW it.
+
+Mr. J. W. Lockwood, a respectable merchant in Troy, New
+York, and son of the late mayor, kept two or three young
+women as 'helps' for his lady, last winter. The name of
+one is Eliza Mead, and the name of another is Catharine
+Dillon, a native of the county of Limerick, Ireland.
+Eliza was an upper servant, who took care of her mistress
+and her children. Catharine was and is now the cook.
+Eliza appeared to her mistress to be a very well educated,
+and a very intellectual woman of 35, though she would
+try to make believe she could not write, and that she
+was subject to fits of insanity. There was then presumptive
+evidence that she wrote a good deal, and there is now
+positive evidence that she could write. She used often,
+in the presence of Mrs. L., to take the Bible and other
+books and read them, and would often say she thought the
+Protestants had a better religion than the Catholics,
+and were a better people. Afterwards she told Mrs. L.
+that she had doubts about the Catholic religion, and was
+inclined toward the Protestant: but now she is sure,
+quite sure, that the Catholic alone is the right one,
+FOR IT WAS REVEALED TO HER.
+
+On the evening of the 23d of December, 1851, Eliza and
+Catharine were missing;--but I will give you Catharine's
+affidavit about their business from home.
+
+"City of Troy, S. W.
+
+"I, Catharine Dillon, say, that on Tuesday, 23d December
+inst, about five o'clock in the afternoon, I went with
+Eliza Mead to see the priest, Mr.  McDonnel, who was at
+home. Eliza remained there till about six o'clock P. M.
+At that time I returned home, leaving her at the priest's.
+At half past eight o'clock the same evening I returned
+to the priest's house for Eliza, and waited there for
+her till about ten o'clock of the same evening, expecting
+that Eliza's conference with the priest would be ended,
+and that she would come home with me.
+
+"During the evening there had been another besides Mr.
+McDonnel there. About ten o'clock this other priest
+retired, as I understood. Soon after this Mr. McDonnel
+called me, with others, into the room where Eliza was,
+when he said that she (Eliza) was POSSESSED OF THE DEVIL
+Mr. McDonnel then commenced interrogating the devil,
+asking the devil if he possessed her. The answer was,
+"Yes." The priest then asked, "How long?" and the answer
+was, "Six months and nine days." The priest then asked,
+"Who sent you into her?" The answer was, "Mr. Lockwood."
+The next question was, "When?" "When she was asleep,"
+was the answer. He then asked the devil if Mr. Lockwood
+had ever tempted Catharine, meaning me, and the reply
+was, "Yes." Then the question was, "How many times?" And
+the answer was, "Three times, by offering her drink when
+she was asleep?"
+
+"I came home about five o'clock in the morning, greatly
+shocked at what I had seen and heard, and impressed with
+the belief that Eliza was possessed with the devil. I
+went again to the priest's on Wednesday to find Eliza,
+when the priest told me that he, Mr. McDonnel, exorcised
+the devil at high mass that morning in the church, and
+drove the devil out of Eliza. That he, the devil, came
+out of Eliza, and spat at the Holy Cross of Jesus Christ,
+and departed. He then told me that, as Eliza got the
+devil from Mr. Lockwood, in the house where I lived, I
+must leave the house immediately, and made me promise
+him that I would. During the appalling scenes of Tuesday
+night, Mr. McDonnel went to the other priest and called
+him up, but the other priest did not come to his assistance.
+These answers to the priest when he was asking questions
+of the devil, were given in a very loud voice and sometimes
+with a loud scream."
+
+"CATHARINE DILLON."
+
+"Subscribed and sworn to, this 31st day of December,
+1851, before me, JOB S. OLIN, Recorder of Troy, New York."
+[A copy.]
+
+At the interview between Mr. J. W. Lockwood and the Rev.
+Mr. McDonnel, officiating priest at St. Peter's church,
+there were present Hon. James M. Warren, T. W. Blatchford,
+M. D., and C. N. Lockwood, on the part of Mr. Lockwood,
+and Father Kenny and Mr. Davis on the part of the Rev.
+Mr. McDonnel, on the evening of the 31st December, 1851.
+
+Mr. McDonnel at first declined answering any questions,
+questioning Mr. Lockwood's right to ask them: He would
+only say that Eliza Mead came to his house possessed, as
+she thought, with an evil spirit; that at first he declined
+having anything to do with her, first, because he believed
+her to be crazy; second, because he was at that moment
+otherwise engaged; and thirdly, because she was not in
+his parish; but, by her urgent appeals in the name of
+God to pray over her, he was at last induced to admit
+her. He became satisfied that she was possessed of the
+devil, or an evil spirit, by saying the appointed prayers
+of the church over her; for the spirit manifested uneasiness
+when this was done; and furthermore, as she was entering
+the church the following morning, she was thrown into
+convulsions by Father Kenny's making the sign of the
+cross behind her back. At high mass in the morning he
+exorcised the devil, and he left her, spitting at the
+cross of Christ before taking his final departure.
+
+As to Mr. McDonnel's repeatedly telling Catharine that
+she must leave Mr. L's house immediately, for if she
+remained there Mr. L. would put the devil in her, Mr.
+McDonnel denied saying or doing anything whatever that
+was detrimental to the character of Mr. L. or any of his
+family. Mr. McDonnel repeatedly refused to answer the
+questions put to him by Mr. L. He considered it insulting
+that Mr. L. should visit his house on such business, as
+no power on earth but that of the POPE had authority to
+question him on such matters. But being reminded that
+slanderous reports had emanated from that very house
+against Mr. L. he, Mr. McDonnel, said it was all to see
+what kind of a man he was that brought Mr. L. there, and
+if reports were exaggerated, it was nothing to him.
+
+Mr. McDonnel said that he cleared the church before
+casting out the devil, and there was but one person
+besides himself there. That, every word spoken in the
+church was in Latin, and nobody in the church understood
+a word of it. That he had heard threats made by Mr. L.,
+also that Mr. L. had said the pretended answers of the
+devil ware made through the medium of ventriloquism.
+Father Kenny, in the progress of the interview, made two
+or three attempts to speak, but was prevented by Mr.
+McDonnel.
+
+Thus ends the report written down by Mr. L.'s brother,
+who was present, immediately after the interview. It was
+all Latin in the church, we see; but the low Irish will
+not believe that the devil could understand Latin. However,
+it was not all Latin at the priest's house, where Catharine
+Dillon heard what she declared on oath. How slow the
+priest was to admit her (Eliza Mead) in the beginning,
+and to believe that she had his sable majesty in her,
+until it manifested uneasiness under the cannonade of
+church prayers!
+
+"But you will ask, how could an educated priest, or an
+intelligent woman, condescend to such diabolical
+impositions? I think it is something after the way that
+a man gets to be a drunkard; he may not like the taste
+thereof at first, but afterwards he will smack his lips
+and say, 'there is nothing like whiskey,' and as their
+food becomes part of their bodily substance, so are these
+'lying wonders' converted into their spiritual substance.
+So I think; I am, however, but a very humble philosopher,
+and therefore I will use the diction of the Holy Spirit
+on the matter: 'For this cause God shall send them strong
+delusions, that they should believe a lie,' EVEN OF THEIR
+OWN MAKING, OR WHAT MAY EASILY BE SEEN TO BE LIES OF
+OTHER'S GETTING, "that they all might be damned who
+believed not the truth, but had pleasure in
+unrighteousness.'"
+
+"JOHN MURPHEY."
+
+ALBANY, June 2nd, 1852.
+
+
+It was said by one "that the first temptation on reading
+such monstrosities as the above, is to utter a laugh of
+derision." But it is with no such feeling that we place
+them before our readers. Rather would we exclaim with
+the inspired penman, "O that my head were waters and mine
+eyes a fountain of tears, that I might weep day and night"
+for the deluded followers of these willfully blind leaders!
+Surely, no pleasure can be found in reading or recording
+scenes which a pure mind can regard only with pity and
+disgust. Yet we desire to prove to our readers that the
+absurd threats and foolish attempts to impose upon the
+weak and ignorant recorded by Sarah J. Richardson are
+perfectly consistent with the general character and
+conduct of the Romish priests. Read for instance, the
+following ridiculous story translated from Le Semeur
+Canadien for October 12th, 1855.
+
+A NEW MEANS OF CONVERSION.
+
+In the district of Montreal lived a Canadian widow of
+French extraction who had become a Protestant. Madam V--,
+such was the name of this lady, lived with her daughter,
+the sole fruit of a union too soon dissolved by unsparing
+death. Their life, full of good works, dispelled prejudices
+that the inhabitants of the vicinity--all intolerant
+Catholics--had always entertained against evangelical
+Christians; they gained their respect, moreover, by
+presenting them the example of every virtue. Two of the
+neighbors of the Protestant widow--who had often heard
+at her house the word of God read and commented upon by
+one of those ministers who visit the scattered members
+of their communion--talked lately of embracing the reformed
+religion. In the mean while, Miss V-- died. The young
+Christian rested her hope upon the promises of the Saviour
+who has said, "Believe in Christ and thou shall be saved."
+
+Her spirit flew to its Creator with the confidence of an
+infant who throws himself into the arms of his father.
+Her last moments were not tormented by the fear of
+purgatory, where every Catholic believes he will suffer
+for a longer or shorter time. This death strengthened
+the neighbors in the resolution they had taken to leave
+the Catholic church. The widow buried the remains of her
+daughter upon her own land, a short distance from her
+house: the nearest Protestant cemetery was so far off
+that she was forced to give up burying it there.
+
+Some Catholic fanatics of the vicinity assembled secretly
+the day after the funeral of Miss V-- to discuss the best
+means for arresting the progress that the reformed religion
+was making in the parish. After long deliberation they
+resolved to hire a poor man to go every evening for a
+whole week and groan near the grave of Miss V---. Their
+object was to make the widow and neighbors believe that
+the young girl was damned; and that God permitted her to
+show her great unhappiness by lamentations, so that they
+might avoid her fate by remaining faithful to the belief
+of their fathers. In any other country than Lower Canada,
+those who might have employed such means would not perhaps
+have had an opportunity of seeing their enterprise crowned
+with success; but in our country districts, where the
+people believe in ghosts and bugbears, it would almost
+certainly produce the desired effect. This expedient,
+instead of being ridiculous, was atrocious. The employment
+of it could not fail to cause Mrs V-- to suffer the most
+painful agonies, and her neighbors the torments of doubt.
+
+The credulity of the French-Canadian is the work of the
+clergy; they invent and relate, in order to excite their
+piety, the most marvellous things. For example: the
+priests say that souls in purgatory desiring alleviation
+come and ask masses of their relatives, either by appearing
+in the same form they had in life, or by displacing the
+furniture and making a noise, as long as they have not
+terminated the expiation of their sins. The Catholic
+clergy, by supporting these fabulous doctrines and pious
+lies, lead their flock into the baleful habit of believing
+things the most absurd and destitute of proof.
+
+The day after Miss V--'s funeral, everybody in the parish
+was talking of the woeful cries which had been heard the
+night before near her grave. The inhabitants of the place,
+imbued with fantastic ideas that their rector had kept
+alive, were dupes of the artifice employed by some of
+their own number. They became convinced that there is no
+safety outside of the church, of which they formed a
+part. Seized with horror they determined never to pass
+a night near the grave of the cursed one, as they already
+called the young Protestant. Mrs. V-- by the instinctive
+effect of prejudices inculcated when she was a Catholic,
+was at first a prey to deadly anxiety; but recalling the
+holy life of her daughter, she no longer doubted of her
+being among the number of the elect. She guessed at the
+cause of the noise which was heard near the grave of her
+child. In order to assure herself of the justness of her
+suspicions, she besought the two neighbors of whom I have
+already spoken, to conceal themselves there the following
+night. These persons were glad of an occasion to test
+the accuracy of what a curate of their acquaintance had
+told them; who had asserted that a spirit free from the
+body could yet manifest itself substantially to the
+living, as speaking without tongue, touching without
+hands.
+
+They discovered the man who was paid to play the ghost;
+they seized him, and in order to punish him, tied him to
+a tree, at the foot of which Miss V-- was buried. The
+poor creature the next morning no longer acted the soul
+in torment, but shouted like a person who very much wanted
+his breakfast. At noon one of his friends passed by who,
+hearing him implore assistance, approached and set him
+free. Overwhelmed with questions and derision, the false
+ghost confessed he had acted thus only to obtain the
+reward which had been promised him. You may easily guess
+that the ridicule and reprobation turned upon those who
+had made him their instrument.
+
+I will not finish this narrative without telling the
+reader that the curate of the place appeared much incensed
+at what his parishioners had done. I am glad to be able
+to suppose that he condemns rather than encourages such
+conduct. A Protestant friend of mine who does not entertain
+the same respect for the Roman clergy that I do, advances
+the opinion that the displeasure of the curate was not
+on account of the culpable attempt of some of his flock
+but on account of its failure. However, I must add, on
+my reputation as a faithful narrator, that nothing has
+yet happened to confirm his assertion.
+
+ERASTE D'ORSONNENS.
+
+MONTREAL, September 1855.
+
+
+
+
+APPENDIX II.
+
+CRUELTY OF ROMANISTS.
+
+To show that the Romish priests have in all ages, and do
+still, inflict upon their victims cruelties quite as
+severe as anything described in the foregoing pages, and
+that such cruelties are sanctioned by their code of laws,
+we have only to turn to the authentic history of the past
+and present transactions of the high functionaries of
+Rome.
+
+About the year 1356, Nicholas Eymeric, inquisitor-general
+of Arragon, collected from the civil and canon laws all
+that related to the punishment of heretics, and formed
+the "Directory of Inquisitors," the first and indeed the
+fundamental code, which has been followed ever since,
+without any essential variation. "It exhibits the practice
+and theory of the Inquisition at the time of its sanction
+by the approbation of Gregory 13th, in 1587, which theory,
+under some necessary variations of practice, still remains
+unchanged."
+
+From this "Directory," transcribed by the Rev. Wm. Rule
+of London, in 1852, we extract a few sentences in relation
+to torture.
+
+"Torture is inflicted on one who confesses the principal
+fact, but varies as to circumstances. Also on one who is
+reputed to be a heretic, but against whom there is only
+one witness of the fact. In this case common rumor is
+one indication of guilt, and the direct evidence is
+another, making altogether but semi-plenar proof. The
+torture may bring out fall proof. Also, when there is no
+witness, but vehement suspicion. Also when there is no
+common report of heresy, but only one witness who has
+heard or seen something in him contrary to the faith.
+Any two indications of heresy will justify the use of
+torture. If you sentence to torture, give him a written
+notice in the form prescribed; but other means be tried
+first. Nor is this an infallible means for bringing out
+the truth. Weak-hearted men, impatient at the first
+pain, will confess crimes they never committed, and
+criminate others at the same time. Bold and strong ones
+will bear the most severe torments. Those who have been
+on the rack before bear it with more courage, for they
+know how to adapt their limbs to it, and they resist
+powerfully. Others, by enchantments, seem to be insensible,
+and would rather die than confess. These wretches user
+for incantations, certain passages from the Psalms of
+David, or other parts of Scripture, which they write on
+virgin parchment in an extravagant way, mixing them with
+names of unknown angels, with circles and strange letters,
+which they wear upon their person. 'I know not,' says
+Pena, 'how this witchcraft can be remedied, but it will
+be well to strip the criminals naked, and search them
+narrowly, before laying them upon the rack.' While the
+tormentor is getting ready, let the inquisitor and other
+grave men make fresh attempts to obtain a confession of
+the truth. Let the tormentors TERRIFY HIM BY ALL MEANS,
+TO FRIGHTEN HIM INTO CONFESSION. And after he is stripped,
+let the inquisitor take him aside, and make a last effort.
+When this has failed, let him be put to the question by
+torture, beginning with interrogation on lesser points,
+and advancing to greater. If he stands out, let them
+show him other instruments of torture, and threaten that
+he shall suffer them also. If he will not confess; the
+torture may be continued on the second or third day; but
+as it is not to be repeated, those successive applications
+must be called CONTINUATION. And if, after all, he does
+not confess, he may be set at liberty."
+
+Rules are laid down for the punishment of those who do
+confess. Innocent IV. commanded the secular judges to
+put heretics to torture; but that gave occasion to
+scandalous publicity, and now inquisitors are empowered
+to do it, and, in case of irregularity (THAT IS, IF THE
+PERSON DIES IN THEIR HANDS), TO ABSOLVE EACH OTHER. And
+although nobles were exempt from torture, and in some
+kingdoms, as Arragon, it was not used in civil tribunals,
+the inquisitors were nevertheless authorized to torture,
+without restriction, persons of all classes.
+
+And here we digress from Eymeric and Pena, in order to
+describe, from additional authority, of what this torture
+consisted, and probably, still consists, in Italy. Limborch
+collects this information from Juan de Rojas, inquisitor
+at Valencia.
+
+"There were five degrees of torment as some counted
+(Eymeric included), or according to others, three. First,
+there was terror, including the threatenings of the
+inquisitor, leading to the place of torture, stripping,
+and binding; the stripping of their clothing, both men
+and women, with the substitution of a single tight garment,
+to cover part of the person--being an outrage of every
+feeling of decency--and the binding, often as distressing
+as the torture itself. Secondly came the stretching on
+the rack, and questions attendant. Thirdly a more severe
+shock, by the tension and sodden relaxation of the cord,
+which is sometimes given once, but often twice, thrice,
+or yet more frequently."
+
+"Isaac Orobio, a Jewish physician, related to Limborch
+the manner in which he had himself been tortured, when
+thrown into the inquisition at Seville, on the delation
+of a Moorish servant, whom he had punished for theft,
+and of another person similarly offended.
+
+"After having been in the prison of the inquisition for
+full three years, examined a few times, but constantly
+refusing to confess the things laid to his charge, he
+was at length brought out of the cell, and led through
+tortuous passages to the place of torment. It was near
+evening. He found himself in a subterranean chamber,
+rather spacious, arched over, and hung with black cloth.
+The whole conclave was lighted by candles in sconces on
+the walls. At one end there was a separate chamber,
+wherein were an inquisitor and his notary seated at a
+table. The place, gloomy, intent, and everywhere terrible,
+seemed to be the very home of death. Hither he was brought,
+and the inquisitor again exhorted him to tell the truth
+before the torture should begin. On his answering that
+he had already told the truth, the inquisitor gravely
+protested that he was bringing himself to the torture by
+his own obstinacy; and that if he should suffer loss of
+blood, or even expire, during the question, the holy
+office would be blameless. Having thus spoken, the
+inquisitor left him in the hands of the tormentors, who
+stripped him, and compressed his body so tightly in a
+pair of linen drawers, that he could no longer draw
+breath, and must have died, had they not suddenly relaxed
+the pressure; but with recovered breathing came pain
+unutterably exquisite. The anguish being past, they
+repeated a monition to confess the truth, before the
+torture, as they said, should begin; and the same was
+afterwards repeated at each interval.
+
+"As Orobio persisted in denial, they bound his thumbs so
+tightly with small cords that the blood burst from under
+the nails, and they were swelled excessively. Then they
+made him stand against the wall on a small stool, passed
+cords around various parts of his body, but principally
+around the arms and legs, and carried them over iron
+pulleys in the ceiling. The tormentor then pulled the
+cords with all his strength, applying his feet to the
+wall, and giving the weight of his body to increase the
+purchase. With these ligatures his arms and legs, fingers
+and toes, were so wrung and swollen that he felt as if
+fire were devouring them. In the midst of this torment
+the man kicked down the stool which had supported his
+feet, so that he hung upon the cords with his whole
+weight, which suddenly increased their tension, and gave
+indescribable aggravation to his pain. Next followed a
+new kind of torment. An instrument resembling a small
+ladder, consisting of two parallel pieces of wood, and
+five transverse pieces, with the anterior edges sharpened,
+was placed before him, so that when the tormentor struck
+it heavily, he received the stroke five times multiplied
+on each shin bone, producing pain that was absolutely
+intolerable, and under which he fainted. Bat no sooner
+was be revived than they inflicted a new torture. The
+tormentor tied other cords around his wrists, and having
+his own shoulders covered with leather, that they might
+not be chafed, passed round them the rope which was to
+draw the cords, set his feet against the wall, threw
+himself back with all his force, and the cords cut through
+to the bones. This he did thrice, each time changing
+the position of the cords, leaving a small distance
+between the successive wounds; but it happened that in
+pulling the second time they slipped into the first
+wounds, and caused such a gush of blood that Orobio
+seemed to be bleeding to death.
+
+"A physician and surgeon, who were in waiting as usual,
+to give their opinion as to the safety or danger of
+continuing those operations, that the inquisitors might
+not commit an irregularity by murdering the patient, were
+called in. Being friends of the sufferer, they gave their
+opinion that he had strength enough remaining to bear
+more. By this means they saved him from a SUSPENSION of
+the torture, which would have been followed by a repetition,
+on his recovery, under the pretext of CONTINUATION. The
+cords were therefore pulled a third time, and this ended
+the torture. He was dressed in his own clothes, carried
+back to prison, and, after about seventy days, when the
+wounds were healed, condemned as one SUSPECTED of Judaism.
+They could not say CONVICTED, because he had not confessed;
+but they sentenced him to wear the sambenito [Footnote:
+This sambenito (Suco bendito or blessed sack,) is a
+garment (or kind of scapulary according to some writers,)
+worn by penitents of the least criminal class in the
+procession of an Auto de Fe, (a solemn ceremony held by
+the Inquisition for the punishment of heretics,) but
+sometimes worn as a punishment at other times, that the
+condemned one might be marked by his neighbors, and ever
+bear a signal that would affright and scare by the
+greatness of the punishment and disgrace; a plan, salutary
+it may be, but very grievous to the offender. It was made
+of yellow cloth, with a St. Andrew's cross upon it, of
+red. A rope was sometimes put around the neck as an
+additional mark of infamy.
+
+Those who were condemned to be burnt were distinguished
+by a habit of the same form, called Zamarra, but instead
+of the red cross were painted flames and devils, and
+sometimes an ugly portrait of the heretic himself,--a
+head, with flames under it. Those who had been sentenced
+to the stake, but indulged with commutation of the penalty,
+had inverted flames painted on the livery, and this was
+called fuego revuelto, "inverted fire."
+
+Upon the head of the condemned was also placed a conical
+paper cap, about three feet high, slightly resembling a
+mitre, called corona or crown. This was painted with
+flames and devils in like manner with the dress.] or
+penitential habit for two years, and then be banished
+for life from Seville."
+
+
+
+
+APPENDIX III.
+
+INQUISITION OF GOA--IMPRISONMENT OF M. DELLON, 1673.
+
+"M. Dellon a French traveller, spending some time at
+Damaun, on the north-western coast of Hindostan, incurred
+the jealousy of the governor and a black priest, in regard
+to a lady, as he is pleased to call her, whom they both
+admired. He had expressed himself rather freely concerning
+some of the grosser superstitions of Romanism, and thus
+afforded the priest, who was also secretary of the
+Inquisition, an occasion of proceeding against him as a
+heretic. The priest and the governor united in a
+representation to the chief inquisitor at Goa, which
+procured an order for his arrest. Like all other persons
+whom it pleased the inquisitors or their servants to
+arrest, in any part of the Portuguese dominions beyond
+the Cape of Good Hope, he was thrown into prison with a
+promiscuous crowd of delinquents, the place and treatment
+being of the worst kind, even according to the colonial
+barbarism of the seventeenth century. To describe his
+sufferings there, is not to our purpose, inasmuch as all
+prisoners fared alike, many of them perishing from
+starvation and disease. Many offenders against the
+Inquisition were there at the same time,--some accused
+of Judaism, others, of Paganism--in which sorcery and
+witchcraft were included--and others of immorality. In
+a field so wide and so fruitful, the "scrutators" of the
+faith could not fail to gather abundantly. After an
+incarceration of at least four months, he and his
+fellow-sufferers were shipped off for the ecclesiastical
+metropolis of India, all of them being in irons. The
+vessel put into Bacaim, and the prisoners were transferred,
+for some days, to the prison of that town, where a large
+number of persons were kept in custody, under charge of
+the commissary of the holy office, until a vessel should
+arrive to carry them to Goa.
+
+"In due time they were again at sea, and a fair wind
+wafted their fleet into that port after a voyage of seven
+days. Until they could be deposited in the cells of the
+Inquisition with the accustomed formalities, the Archbishop
+of Goa threw open HIS prison for their reception, which
+prison, being ecclesiastical, may be deemed worthy of
+description.
+
+"The most filthy," says Dellon, "the most dark, and the
+most horrible that I ever saw; and I doubt whether a more
+shocking and horrible prison can be found anywhere. It
+is a kind of cave wherein there is no day seen but by a
+very little hole; the most subtle rays of the sun cannot
+enter into it, and there is never any true light in it.
+The stench is extreme. * * *
+
+"On the 16th of January 1674, at eight o'clock in the
+morning, an officer came with orders to take the prisoners
+to "the holy house." With considerable difficulty M.
+Dellon dragged his iron-loaded limbs thither. They helped
+him to ascend the stairs at the great entrance, and in
+the hall, smiths were waiting to take off the irons from
+all the prisoners. One by one, they were summoned to
+audience. Dellon, who was called the first, crossed the
+hall, passed through an ante-chamber, and entered a room,
+called by the Portuguese "board of the holy office,"
+where the grand inquisitor of the Indies sat at one end
+of a very large table, on an elevated floor in the middle
+of the chamber. He was a secular priest about forty years
+of age, in full vigor--a man who could do his work with
+energy. At one end of the room was a large crucifix,
+reaching from the floor almost to the ceiling, and near
+it, sat a notary on a folding stool. At the opposite end,
+and near the inquisitor, Dellon was placed, and, hoping
+to soften his judge, fell on his knees before him. But
+the inquisitor commanded him to rise, asked whether he
+knew the reason of his arrest, and advised him to declare
+it at large, as that was the only way to obtain a speedy
+release. Dellon caught at the hope of release, began to
+tell his tale, mixed with tears and protestations, again
+fell at the feet of Don Francisco Delgado Ematos, the
+inquisitor, and implored his favorable attention. Don
+Francisco told him, very coolly, that he had other business
+on hand, and, nothing moved, rang a silver bell. The
+alcayde entered, led the prisoner out into a gallery,
+opened, and searched his trunk, stripped him of every
+valuable, wrote an inventory, assured him that all should
+be safely kept, and then led him to a cell about ten feet
+square, and left him there, shut up in utter solitude.
+In the evening they brought him his first meal, which he
+ate heartily, and slept a little during the night following.
+Next morning he learnt that he could have no part of his
+property, not even a breviary was, in that place, allowed
+to a priest, for they had no form of religion there, and
+for that reason he could not have a book. His hair was
+cropped close; and therefore "he did not need a comb."
+
+"Thus began his acquaintance with the holy house, which
+he describes as "great and magnificent," on one side of
+the great space before the church of St Catharine. There
+were three gates in front; and, it was by the central,
+or largest, that the prisoners entered, and mounted a
+stately flight of steps, leading into the great hall.
+The side gates provided entrance to spacious ranges of
+apartments, belonging to the inquisitors. Behind the
+principal building, was another, very spacious, two
+stories high, and consisting of double rows of cells,
+opening into galleries that ran from end to end. The
+cells on the ground-floor were very small, without any
+aperture from without for light or air. Those of the
+upper story were vaulted, white-washed, had a small
+strongly grated window, without glass, and higher than
+the tallest man could reach. Towards the gallery every
+cell was shut with two doors, one on the inside, the
+other one outside of the wall. The inner door folded,
+was grated at the bottom, opened towards the top for the
+admission of food and was made fast with very strong
+bolts. The outer door was not so thick, had no window,
+but was left open from six o'clock every morning until
+eleven--a necessary arrangement in that climate, unless
+it were intended to destroy life by suffocation.
+
+"To each prisoner was given as earthen pot with water
+wherewith to wash, another full of water to drink, with
+a cup; a broom, a mat whereon to lie, and a large basin
+with a cover, changed every fourth day. The prisoners
+had three meals a day; and their health so far as food
+could contribute to it in such a place, was cared for in
+the provision of a wholesome, but spare diet. Physicians
+were at hand to render all necessary assistance to the
+sick, as were confessors, ready to wait upon the dying;
+but they gave no viaticum, performed no unction, said no
+mass. The place was under an impenetrable interdict. If
+any died, and that many did die is beyond question, his
+death was unknown to all without; he was buried within
+the walls without any sacred ceremony; and if, after
+death, he was found to have died in heresy, his bones
+were taken up at the next Auto, to be burned. Unless
+there happened to be an unusual number of prisoners, each
+one was alone in his own cell. He might not speak, nor
+groan, nor sob aloud, nor sigh. [Footnote: Limborch
+relates that on one occasion, a poor prisoner was heard
+to cough; the jailer of the Inquisition instantly repaired
+to him, and warned him to forbear, as the slightest noise
+was not tolerated in that house. The poor man replied
+that it was not in his power to forbear; a second time
+they admonished him to desist; and when again, unable to
+do otherwise, he repeated the offence, they stripped him
+naked, and cruelly beat him. This increased his cough,
+for which they beat him so often, that at last he died
+through pain and anguish of the stripes he had received.]
+His breathing might be audible when the guard listened
+at the grating, but nothing more. Four guards were
+stationed in each long gallery, open, indeed, at each
+end, but awfully silent, as if it were the passage of a
+catacomb. If, however, he wanted anything, he might tap
+at the inner door, when a jailer would come to hear the
+request, and would report to the alcayde, but was not
+permitted to answer. If one of the victims, in despair,
+or pain, or delirium, attempted to pronounce a prayer,
+even to God, or dared to utter a cry, the jailers would
+run to the cell, rush in, and beat him cruelly, for terror
+to the rest. Once in two months the inquisitor, with a
+secretary and an interpreter, visited the prisons, and
+asked each prisoner if he wanted anything, if his meat
+was regularly brought, and if he had any complaint against
+the jailers. His want after all lay at the mercy of the
+merciless. His complaint, if uttered, would bring down
+vengeance, rather than gain redress. But in this visitation
+the holy office professed mercy with much formality, and
+the inquisitorial secretary collected notes which aided
+in the crimination, or in the murder of their victims.
+
+"The officers of Goa were;--the inquisidor mor or grand
+inquisitor, who was always a secular priest; the second
+inquisitor, Dominican friar; several deputies, who came,
+when called for, to assist the inquisitors at trials,
+but never entered without such a summons; qualifiers, as
+usual, to examine books and writings, but never to witness
+an examination of the living, or be present at any act
+of the kind; a fiscal; a procurator; advocates, so called,
+for the accused; notaries and familiars. The authority
+of this tribunal was absolute in Goa. There does not
+appear to have been anything peculiar in the manner of
+examining and torturing at Goa where the practice coincided
+with that of Portugal and Spain.
+
+"The personal narrative of Dellon affords a distinct
+exemplification of the sufferings of the prisoners. He
+had been told that, when he desired an audience, he had
+only to call a jailer, and ask it, when it would be
+allowed him. But, notwithstanding many tears and entreaties,
+he could not obtain one until fifteen days had passed
+away. Then came the alcayde and one of his guards. This
+alcayde walked first out of the cell; Dellon uncovered
+and shorn, and with legs and feet bare, followed him;
+the guard walked behind. The alcayde just entered the
+place of audience, made a profound reverence, stepped
+back and allowed his charge to enter. The door closed,
+and Dellon remained alone with the inquisitor and secretary.
+He knelt; but Don Fernando sternly bade him to sit on a
+bench, placed there for the use of the culprits. Near
+him, on a table, lay a missal, on which they made him
+lay his hand, and swear to keep secrecy, and tell them
+the truth. They asked if he knew the cause of his
+imprisonment, and whether he was resolved to confess it.
+He told them all he could recollect of unguarded sayings
+at Damaun, either in argument or conversation, without
+ever, that he knew, contradicting, directly or indirectly,
+any article of faith. He had, at some time dropped an
+offensive word concerning the Inquisition, but so light
+a word, that it did not occur to his remembrance. Don
+Fernando told him he had done well in ACCUSING HIMSELF
+so willingly, and exhorted him in the name of Jesus
+Christ, to complete his self accusation fully, to the
+end that he might experience the goodness and mercy which
+were used in that tribunal towards those who showed true
+repentance by a sincere and UNFORCED confession. The
+secretary read aloud the confession and exhortation,
+Dellon signed it, Don Fernando rang a silver bell, the
+alcayde walked in, and, in a few moments, the disappointed
+victim was again in his dungeon.
+
+"At the end of another fortnight, and without having
+asked for it, he was again taken to audience. After a
+repetition of the former questions, he was asked his
+name, surname, baptism, confirmation, place of abode, in
+what parish? in what diocess? under what bishop? They
+made him kneel, and make the sign of the cross, repeat
+the Pater Noster, Hail Mary, creed, commandments of God,
+commandments of the church, and Salve Begins. He did it
+all very cleverly, and even to their satisfaction; but
+the grand inquisitor exhorted him, by the tender mercies
+of our Lord Jesus Christ, to confess without delay, and
+sent him to the cell again. His heart sickened. They
+required him to do what was impossible--to confess more,
+after he had acknowledged ALL. In despair, he tried to
+starve himself to death; 'but they compelled him to take
+food.' Day and night he wept, and at length betook himself
+to prayer, imploring pity of the 'blessed Virgin,' whom
+he imagined to be, of all beings, the most merciful, and
+the most ready to give him help.
+
+"At the end of a month, he succeeded in obtaining another
+audience, and added to his former confessions what he
+had remembered, for the first time, touching the
+Inquisition. But they told him that that was not what
+they wanted, and sent him back again. This was intolerable.
+In a frenzy of despair he determined to commit suicide,
+if possible. Feigning sickness, be obtained a physician
+who treated him for a fever, and ordered him to be bled.
+Never calmed by any treatment of the physician,
+blood-letting was repeated often, and each time he untied
+the bandage, when left alone, hoping to die from loss of
+blood, but death fled from him. A humane Franciscan came
+to confess him, and, hearing his tale of misery, gave
+him kind words, asked permission to divulge his attempt
+at self-destruction to the inquisitor, procured him a
+mitigation of solitude by the presence of a fellow-prisoner,
+a negro, accused of magic; but, after five months, the
+negro was removed, and his mind, broken with suffering,
+could no longer bear up under the aggravated load. By
+an effort of desperate ingenuity he almost succeeded in
+committing suicide, and a jailer found him weltering in
+his blood and insensible. Having restored him by cordials,
+and bound up his wounds, they carried him into the presence
+of the inquisitor once more; where he lay on the floor,
+being unable to sit, heard bitter reproaches, had his
+limbs confined in irons, and was thus carried back to a
+punishment that seemed more terrible than death. In
+fetters he became so furious, that they found it necessary
+to take them off, and, from that time, his examinations
+assumed another character, as he defended his positions
+with citations from the Council of Trent, and with some
+passages of scripture, which he explained in the most
+Romish sense, discovering a depth of ignorance in Don
+Fernando that was truly surprising. That 'grand Inquisitor,'
+had never heard the passage which Dellon quoted to prove
+the doctrine of baptismal regeneration, 'Except a man be
+born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into
+the kingdom of God.' Neither did he know anything of that
+famous passage in the twenty-fifth session of the Council
+of Trent, which declares that images are only to be
+reverenced on account of the persons whom they represent.
+He called for a Bible, and for the acts of the council,
+and was evidently surprised when he found them where
+Dellon told him they might be seen.
+
+"The time for a general auto drew near. During the months
+of November and December, 1675, he heard every morning
+the cries of persons under torture, and afterwards saw
+many of them, both men and women, lame and distorted by
+the rack. On Sunday January 11th, 1676, he was surprised
+by the jailer refusing to receive his linen to be
+washed--Sunday being washing-day in the 'holy house.'
+While perplexing himself to think what that could mean,
+the cathedral bells rang for vespers, and then, contrary
+to custom, rang again for matins. He could only account
+for that second novelty by supposing that an auto would
+be celebrated the next day. They brought him supper,
+which he refused, and, contrary to their wont at all
+other times, they did not insist on his taking it, but
+carried it away. Assured that those were all portents of
+the horrible catastrophe, and reflecting on often-repeated
+threats in the audience chamber that he should be burnt,
+he gave himself up to death, and overwhelmed with sorrow,
+fell asleep a little before midnight.
+
+"Scarcely had he fallen asleep when the alcayde and guards
+entered the cell, with great noise, bringing a lamp, for
+the first time since his imprisonment that they had
+allowed a lamp to shine there. The alcayde, laying down
+a suit of clothes, bade him put them on, and be ready to
+go out when he came again. At two o'clock in the morning
+they returned, and he issued from the cell, clad in a
+black vest and trowsers, striped with white, and his feet
+bare. About two hundred prisoners, of whom he was one,
+were made to sit on the floor, along the sides of a
+spacious gallery, all in the same black livery, and just
+visible by the gleaming of a few lamps. A large company
+of women were also ranged in a neighboring gallery in
+like manner. But they were all motionless, and no one
+knew his doom. Every eye was fixed, and each one seemed
+benumbed with misery.
+
+"A third company Dellon perceived in a room not far
+distant, but they were walking about, and some appeared
+to have long habits. Those were persons condemned to be
+delivered to the secular arm, and the long habits
+distinguished confessors busily collecting confessions
+in order to commute that penalty for some other scarcely
+less dreadful. At four o'clock, servants of the house
+came, with guards, and gave bread and figs to those who
+would accept the refreshment. One of the guards gave
+Dellon some hope of life by advising him to take what
+was offered, which he had refused to do. 'Take your
+bread,' said the man, 'and if you cannot eat it now, put
+it in your pocket; you will be certainly hungry before
+you return.' This gave hope, that he should not end the
+day at the stake, but come back to undergo penance.
+
+"A little before sunrise, the great bell of the cathedral
+tolled, and its sound soon aroused the city of Goa. The
+people ran into the streets, lining the chief thoroughfares,
+and crowding every place whence a view could be had of
+the procession. Day broke, and Dellon saw the faces of
+his fellow-prisoners, most of whom were Indians. He could
+only distinguish, by their complexion, about twelve
+Europeans. Every countenance exhibited shame, fear, grief,
+or an appalling blackness of apathy, AS IF DIRE SUFFERING
+IN THE LIGHTLESS DUNGEONS UNDERNEATH HAD BEREFT THEM OF
+INTELLECT. The company soon began to move, but slowly,
+as one by one the alcayde led them towards the door of
+the great hall, where the grand inquisitor sat, and his
+secretary called the name of each as he came, and the
+name of a sponsor, who also presented himself from among
+a crowd of the bettermost inhabitants of Goa, assembled
+there for that service. 'The general of the Portuguese
+ships in the Indies' had the honor of placing himself
+beside our Frenchman. As soon as the procession was
+formed, it marched off in the usual order.
+
+"First, the Dominicans, honored with everlasting precedence
+on all such occasions, led the way. Singing-boys also
+preceded, chanting a litany. The banner of the Inquisition
+was intrusted to their hands. After the banner walked
+the penitents--a penitent and a sponsor, two and two. A
+cross bearer brought up the train, carrying a crucifix
+aloft, turned towards them, in token of pity; and, on
+looking along the line, you might have seen another priest
+going before the penitents with a crucifix turned backwards,
+inviting their devotions. They to whom the Inquisition
+no longer afforded mercy, walked behind the penitents,
+and could only see an averted crucifix. These were
+condemned to be burnt alive at the stake! On this occasion
+there were but two of this class, but sometimes a large
+number were sentenced to this horrible death, and presented
+to the spectator a most pitiable spectacle. Many of them
+bore upon their persons the marks of starvation, torture,
+terror, and heart-rending grief. Some faces were bathed
+in tears, while others came forth with a smile of conquest
+on the countenance and words of triumphant faith bursting
+from the lips. These, however, were known as dogmatizers,
+and were generally gagged, the month being filled with
+a piece of wood kept in by a strong leather band fastened
+behind the head, and the arms tied together behind the
+back. Two armed familiars walked or rode beside each of
+these, and two ecclesiastics, or some other clerks or
+regulars, also attended. After these, the images of
+heretics who had escaped were carried aloft, to be thrown
+into the flames; and porters came last, tagging under
+the weight of boxes containing the disinterred bodies on
+which the execution of the church had fallen, and which
+were also to be burnt.
+
+"Poor Dellon went barefoot, like the rest, through the
+streets of Goa, rough with little flint stones scattered
+about, and sorely were his feet wounded during an hour's
+march up and down the principal streets. Weary, covered
+with shame and confusion, the long train of culprits
+entered the church of St. Francis, where preparation was
+made for the auto, the climate of India not permitting
+a celebration of that solemnity under the burning sky.
+They sat with their sponsors, in the galleries prepared,
+sambenitos, grey zamarras with painted flames and devils,
+corozas, tapers, and all the other paraphernalia of an
+auto, made up a woeful spectacle. The inquisitor and
+other personages having taken their seats of state, the
+provincial of the Augustinians mounted the pulpit and
+delivered the sermon. Dellon preserved but one note of
+it. The preacher compared the Inquisition to Noah's ark,
+which received all sorts of beasts WILD, but sent them
+out TAME. The appearance of hundreds who had been inmates
+of that ark certainly justified the figure.
+
+"After the sermon, two readers went up, one after the
+other, into the same pulpit, and, between them, they read
+the processes and pronounced the sentences, the person
+standing before them, with the alcayde, and holding a
+lighted taper in his hand. Dellon, in turn, heard the
+cause of his long-suffering. He had maintained the
+invalidity of baptismus flaminis, or desire to be baptised,
+when there is no one to administer the rite of baptism
+by water. He had said that images ought not to be adored,
+and that an ivory crucifix was a piece of ivory. He had
+spoken contemptuously of the Inquisition. And, above all,
+he had an ill intention. His punishment was to be
+confiscation of his property, banishment from India, and
+five years' service in the galleys in Portugal, with
+penance, as the inquisitors might enjoin. As all the
+prisoners were excommunicate, the inquisitor, after the
+sentence had been pronounced, put on his alb and stole,
+walked into the middle of the church, and absolved them
+all at once. Dellon's sponsor, who would not even answer
+him before, when he spoke, now embraced him, called him
+brother, and gave him a pinch of snuff, in token of
+reconciliation.
+
+"But there were two persons, a man and a woman, for whom
+the church had no more that they could do; and these,
+with four dead bodies, and the effigies of the dead, were
+taken to be burnt on the Campo Santo Lazaro, on the river
+side, the place appointed for that purpose, that the
+viceroy might see justice done on the heretics, as he
+surveyed the execution from his palace-windows."
+
+The remainder of Dellon's history adds nothing to what
+we have already heard of the Inquisition. He was taken
+to Lisbon, and, after working in a gang of convicts for
+some time, was released on the intercession of some
+friends in France with the Portuguese government. With
+regard to his despair, and attempts to commit suicide,
+when in the holy house, we may observe that, as he states,
+suicide was very frequent there. The contrast of his
+disconsolate impatience with the resignation and constancy
+of Christian confessors in similar circumstances, is
+obvious. As a striking illustration of the difference
+between those who suffer without a consciousness of divine
+favor, and those who rejoice with joy unspeakable and
+full of glory, we would refer the reader to that noble
+band of martyrs who suffered death at the stake, at the
+Auto held in Seville, on Sunday, September 24, 1559. At
+that time twenty-one were burnt, followed by one effigy,
+and eighteen penitents, who were released.
+
+"One of the former was Don Juan Gonzales, Presbyter of
+Seville, an eminent preacher. With admirable constancy
+he refused to make any declaration, in spite of the severe
+torture, saying that he had not followed any erroneous
+opinions, but that he had drawn his faith from the holy
+Scriptures; and for this faith he pleaded to his tormentors
+in the words of inspiration. He maintained that he was
+not a heretic, but a Christian, and absolutely refused
+to divulge anything that would bring his brethren into
+trouble. Two sisters of his were also brought out to this
+Auto, and displayed equal faith. They would confess
+Christ, they said, and suffer with their brother, whom
+they revered as a wise and holy man. They were all tied
+to stakes on the quemadero, a piece of pavement, without
+the walls of the city, devoted to the single use of
+burning human victims. Sometimes this quemadero [Footnote:
+Llorente, the historian of the Spanish Inquisition, says,
+"So many persons were to be put to death by fire, the
+governor of Seville caused a permanent raised platform
+of masonry to be constructed outside the city, which has
+lasted to our time (until the French revolution) retaining
+its name of Quemadero, or burning-place, and at the four
+corners four large hollow stalutes of limestone, within
+which they used to place the impenitent alive, that they
+might die by slow fires."] was a raised platform of stone,
+adorned with pillows or surrounded with statues, to
+distinguish and beautify the spot. Just as the fire was
+lit, the gag, which had hitherto silenced Don Juan, was
+removed, and as the flames burst from the fagots, he said
+to his sisters, 'Let us sing, Deus laudem meam ne tacueris.'
+And they sang together, while burning, 'Hold not thy
+peace, O God of my praise; for the mouth of the wicked
+and the mouth of the deceitful are opened against me:
+they have spoken against me with a lying tongue.' Thus
+they died in the faith of Christ, and of his holy gospel."
+
+
+
+
+APPENDIX IV.
+
+INQUISITION OF GOA, CONCLUDED.
+
+The Inquisition of Goa continued its Autos for a century
+after the affair of Dellon. In the summer of 1808, Dr.
+Claudius Buchanan visited that city, and had been
+unexpectedly invited by Joseph a Doloribus, second and
+most active inquisitor, to lodge with him during his
+visit. Not without some surprise, Dr. Buchanan found
+himself, heretic, schismatic, and rebel as he was, politely
+entertained by so dread a personage. Regarding his English
+visitor merely as a literary man, or professing to do
+so, Friar Joseph, himself well educated, seemed to enjoy
+his company, and was unreservedly communicative on every
+subject not pertaining to his own vocation. When that
+subject was first introduced by an apparently incidental
+question, he did not hesitate to return the desired
+information, telling Dr. Buchanan that the establishment
+was nearly as extensive as in former times. In the library
+of the chief inquisitor he saw a register containing the
+names of all the officers, who still were numerous.
+
+On the second evening after his arrival, the doctor was
+surprised to see his host come from his apartment, clothed
+in black robes from head to foot, instead of white, the
+usual color of his order (Augustinian). He said that he
+was going to sit on the tribunal of the holy office, and
+it transpired that, so far from his "august office" not
+occupying much of his time, he had to sit there three or
+four days every week. After his return, in the evening,
+the doctor put Dellon's book into his hand, asking him
+if he had ever seen it. He had never seen it before, and,
+after reading aloud and slowly, "Relation de l'Inquisition
+de Goa," began to peruse it with eagerness.
+
+While Dr. Buchanan employed himself in writing, Friar
+Joseph devoured page after page; but as the narrative
+proceeded, betrayed evident symptoms of uneasiness. He
+then turned to the middle, looked at the end, skimmed
+over the table of contents, fixed on its principal
+passages, and at one place exclaimed, in his broad Italian
+accent, "Mendacium! mendacium.'" The doctor requested
+him to mark the passages that were untrue, proposed to
+discuss them afterwards, and said he had other books on
+the subject. The mention of other books startled him; he
+looked up anxiously at some books on the table, and then
+gave himself up to the perusal of Dellon's "Relation,"
+until bedtime. Even then, he asked permission to take it
+to his chamber.
+
+The doctor had fallen asleep under the roof of the
+inquisitor's convent, confident, under God, in the
+protection at that time guaranteed to a British subject,
+his servants sleeping in the gallery outside the
+chamber-door. About midnight, he was waked by loud
+shrieks and expressions of terror from some one in the
+gallery. In the first moment of surprise, he concluded
+it must be the alguazils of the holy office seizing his
+servants to carry them to the Inquisition. But, on going
+out, he saw the servants standing at the door, and the
+person who had caused the alarm, a boy of about fourteen,
+at a little distance, surrounded by some of the priests,
+who had come out of their cells on hearing the noise.
+The boy said he had seen a spectre; and it was a
+considerable time before the agitations of his body and
+voice subsided. Next morning at breakfast, the inquisitor
+apologized for the disturbance, and said the boy's alarm
+proceeded from a phantasma animi,--phantom of the
+imagination.
+
+It might have been so. Phantoms might well haunt such a
+place. As to Dellon's book, the inquisitor acknowledged
+that the descriptions were just; but complained that he
+had misjudged the motives of the inquisitors, and written
+uncharitably of Holy Church. Their conversation grew
+earnest, and the inquisitor was anxious to impress his
+visitor with the idea that the Inquisition had undergone
+a change in some respects, and that its terrors were
+mitigated. At length Dr. Buchanan plainly requested to
+see the Inquisition, that he might judge for himself as
+to the humanity shown to the inmates,--according to the
+inquisitor,--and gave, as a reason why he should be
+satisfied, his interest in the affairs of India, on which
+he had written, and his purpose to write on them again,
+in which case he could scarcely be silent concerning the
+Inquisition. The countenance of his host fell; but, after
+some further observations, he reluctantly promised to
+comply. Next morning, after breakfast, Joseph a Doloribus
+went to dress for the holy office, and soon returned in
+his black robes. He said he would go half an hour before
+the usual time, for the purpose of showing him the
+Inquisition. The doctor fancied he looked more severe
+than usual, and that his attendants were not as civil as
+before. But the truth was, that the midnight scene still
+haunted him. They had proceeded in their palanquins to
+the holy house, distant about a quarter of a mile from
+the convent, and the inquisitor said as they were ascending
+the steps of the great entrance, that he hoped the doctor
+would be satisfied with a transient view of the Inquisition,
+and would retire when he should desire him to do so. The
+doctor followed with tolerable confidence, towards the
+great hall aforementioned, where they were met by several
+well-dressed persons, familiars, as it afterwards appeared,
+who bowed very low to the inquisitor, and looked with
+surprise at the stranger. Dr. Buchanan paced the hall
+slowly, and in thoughtful silence; the inquisitor thoughtful
+too, silent and embarrassed. A multitude of victims seemed
+to haunt the place, and the doctor could not refrain from
+breaking silence. "Would not the Holy Church wish, in
+her mercy, to have those souls back again, that she might
+allow them a little further probation?" The inquisitor
+answered nothing, but beckoned him to go with him to a
+door at one end of the hall. By that door he conducted
+him to some small rooms, and thence, to the spacious
+apartments of the chief inquisitor. Having surveyed
+those, he brought him back again to the great hall, and
+seemed anxious that the troublesome visitor should depart;
+but only the very words of Dr. B. can adequately describe
+the close of this extraordinary interview."
+
+"Now, father," said I, "lead me to the dungeons below:
+I want to see the captives." "No," said he, "that cannot
+be." I now began to suspect that it had been in the mind
+of the inquisitor, from the beginning, to show me only
+a certain part of the Inquisition, in the hope of satisfying
+my inquiries in a general way. I urged him with earnestness;
+but he steadily resisted, and seemed offended, or, rather,
+agitated, by my importunity. I intimated to him plainly,
+that the only way to do justice to his own assertion and
+arguments regarding the present state of the Inquisition,
+was to show me the prisons and the captives. I should
+then describe only what I saw; but now the subject was
+left in awful obscurity. "Lead me down," said I, "to the
+inner building, and let me pass through the two hundred
+dungeons, ten feet square, described by your former
+captives. Let me count the number of your present captives,
+and converse with them. I WANT, TO SEE IF THERE BE ANY
+SUBJECTS OF THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT, TO WHOM WE OWE
+PROTECTION. I want to ask how long they have been there,
+how long it is since they have seen the light of the sun,
+and whether they ever expect to see it again. Show me
+the chamber of torture, and declare what modes of execution
+or punishment are now practiced inside the walls of the
+Inquisition, in lieu of the public Auto de Fe. If, after
+all that has passed, father, you resist this reasonable
+request, I should be justified in believing that you are
+afraid of exposing the real state of the Inquisition in
+India."
+
+To these observations the inquisitor made no reply; but
+seemed impatient that I should withdraw. "My good father,"
+said I; "I am about to take my leave of you, and to thank
+you for your hospitable attentions; and I wish to preserve
+on my mind a favorable sentiment of your kindness and
+candor. You cannot, you say, show me the captives and
+the dungeons; be pleased, then, merely to answer this
+question, for I shall believe your word: how many prisoners
+are there now below in the cells of the Inquisition?" He
+replied, "That is a question which I cannot answer." On
+his pronouncing these words, I retired hastily towards
+the door, and wished him farewell. We shook hands with
+as much cordiality as we could, at the moment, assume;
+and both of us, I believe, were sorry that our parting
+took place with a clouded countenance.
+
+After leaving the inquisitor, Dr. Buchanan, feeling as
+if he could not refrain from endeavoring to get another
+and perhaps a nearer view, returned to avail himself of
+the pretext afforded by a promise from the chief inquisitor,
+of a letter to one of the British residents at Travancore,
+in answer to one which he had brought him from that
+officer. The inquisitors he expected to find within, in
+the "board of the holy office." The door-keepers surveyed
+him doubtfully, but allowed him to pass. He entered the
+great hall, went up directly to the lofty crucifix
+described by Dellon, sat down on a form, wrote some notes,
+and then desired an attendant to carry in his name to
+the inquisitor. As he was walking across the hall, he
+saw a poor woman sitting by the wall. She clasped her
+hands, and looked at him imploringly. The sight chilled
+his spirits; and as he was asking the attendants the
+cause of her apprehension,--for she was awaiting
+trial,--Joseph a Doloribus came, in answer to his message,
+and was about to complain of the intrusion, when he
+parried the complaint by asking for the letter from the
+chief inquisitor. He promised to send it after him, and
+conducted him to the door. As they passed the poor woman,
+the doctor pointed to her, and said with emphasis, "Behold,
+father, another victim of the Holy Inquisition." The
+other answered nothing; they bowed, and separated without
+a word.
+
+When Dr. Buchanan published his "Christian Researches in
+Asia," in the year 1812, the Inquisition still existed
+at Goa; but the establishment of constitutional government
+in Portugal, put an end to it throughout the whole
+Portuguese dominions.
+
+
+
+
+APPENDIX V.
+
+INQUISITION AT MACERATA, ITALY.
+NARRATIVE OF MR. BOWER. METH. MAG. THIRD VOL.
+
+
+I never pretended that it was for the sake of religion
+alone, that I left Italy, On the contrary, I have often
+declared, that, had I never belonged to the Inquisition,
+I should have gone on, as most Roman Catholics do, without
+ever questioning the truth of the religion I was brought
+up in, or thinking of any other. But the unheard of
+cruelties of that hellish tribunal shocked me beyond all
+expression, and rendered me,--as I was obliged, by my
+office of Counsellor, to be accessary to them,--one of
+the most unhappy men upon earth. I therefore began to
+think of resigning my office; but as I had on several
+occasions, betrayed some weakness as they termed it, that
+is, some compassion and humanity, and had upon that
+account been reprimanded by the Inquisitor, I was well
+apprized that my resignation would be ascribed by him to
+my disapproving the proceedings of the holy tribunal.
+And indeed, to nothing else could it be ascribed, as a
+place at that board was a sure way to preferment, and
+attended with great privileges, and a considerable salary.
+Being, therefore, sensible how dangerous a thing it would
+be to give the least ground for any suspicions of that
+nature, and no longer able to bear the sight of the many
+barbarities practised almost daily within those walls,
+nor the reproaches of my conscience for being accessary
+to them, I determined, after many restless nights, and
+much deliberation, to withdraw at the same time from the
+Inquisition, and from Italy. In this mind, and in the
+most unhappy and tormenting situation that can possibly
+be imagined, I continued near a twelve-month, not able
+to prevail on myself to execute the resolution I had
+taken on account of the many dangers which I foresaw
+would inevitably attend it, and the dreadful consequences
+of my failing in the attempt. But, being in the mean time
+ordered by the Inquisitor, to apprehend a person with
+whom I had lived in the greatest intimacy and friendship,
+the part I was obliged to act on that occasion, left so
+deep an impression on my mind as soon prevailed over all
+my fears, and made me determine to put into execution,
+at all events, and without delay, the design I had formed.
+Of that transaction I shall give a particular account,
+as it will show in a very strong light the nature and
+proceedings of that horrid court.
+
+The person whom the Inquisitor appointed me to apprehend
+was Count Vicenzo della Torre, descended from an illustrious
+family in Germany, and possessed of a very considerable
+estate in the territory of Macerata. He was one of my
+very particular friends, and had lately married the
+daughter of Signior Constantini, of Fermo, a lady no less
+famous for her good sense than her beauty. With her family
+too, I had contracted an intimate acquaintance, while
+Professor of Rhetoric in Fermo, and had often attended
+the Count during his courtship, from Macerata to Fermo,
+but fifteen miles distant. I therefore lived with both
+in the greatest friendship and intimacy; and the Count
+was the only person that lived with me, after I was made
+Counsellor of the Inquisition, upon the same free footing
+as he had done till that time. My other friends had grown
+shy of me, and gave me plainly to understand that they
+no longer cared for my company.
+
+As this unhappy young gentleman was one day walking with
+another, he met two Capuchin friars, and turning to his
+companion, when they had passed, "what fools," said he,
+"are these, to think they shall gain heaven by wearing
+sackcloth and going barefoot! Fools indeed, if they think
+so, or that there is any merit in tormenting one's self;
+they might as well live as we do, and they would get to
+heaven quite as soon." Who informed against him, whether
+the friars, his companion, or somebody else, I know not;
+for the inquisitors never tell the names of informers to
+the Counsellors, nor the names of the witnesses, lest
+they should except against them. It is to be observed,
+that all who hear any proposition that appears to them
+repugnant to, or inconsistent with the doctrines of holy
+mother church, are bound to reveal it to the Inquisitor,
+and also to discover the person by whom it was uttered;
+and, in this affair no regard is to be had to any ties,
+however sacred. The brother being bound to accuse the
+brother, the father the son, the son the father, the wife
+her husband, and the husband his wife; and all bound on
+pain of eternal damnation, and of being treated as
+accomplices if they do not denounce in a certain time;
+and no confessor can absolve a person who has heard
+anything said in jest or in earnest, against the belief
+or practice of the church, till that person has informed
+the Inquisitor of it, and given him all the intelligence
+he can concerning the person by whom it was spoken.
+
+Whoever it was that informed against my unhappy friend,
+whether the friars, his companion, or somebody else who
+might have overheard him, the Inquisitor acquainted the
+board one night, (for to be less observed, they commonly
+meet, out of Rome, in the night) that the above mentioned
+propositions had been advanced, and advanced gravely, at
+the sight of two poor Capuchins; that the evidence was
+unexceptionable; and that they were therefore met to
+determine the quality of the proposition, and proceed
+against the delinquent.
+
+There are in each Inquisition twelve Counsellors, viz:
+four Divines, four Canonists, and four Civilians. It is
+chiefly the province of the divines to determine the
+quality of the proposition, whether it is heretical, or
+only savors of heresy; whether it is blasphemous and
+injurious to God and His saints or only erroneous, rash,
+schismatical, or offensive to pious ears. The part of
+the proposition, "Fools! if they think there is any merit
+in tormenting one's self," was judged and declared
+heretical, as openly contradicting the doctrine and
+practice of holy mother church recommending austerities
+as highly meritorious. The Inquisitor observed, on this
+occasion, that by the proposition, "Fools indeed" &c.,
+were taxing with folly, not only the holy fathers, who
+had all to a man practised great austerities, but St.
+Paul himself as the Inquisitor understood it, adding that
+the practice of whipping one's self, so much recommended
+by all the founders of religious orders, was borrowed of
+the great apostle of the gentiles.
+
+The proposition being declared heretical, it was unanimously
+agreed by the board that the person who had uttered it
+should be apprehended, and proceeded against agreeably
+to the laws of the Inquisition. And now the person was
+named; for, till it is determined whether the accused
+person should or should not be apprehended, his name is
+kept concealed from the counsellors, lest they should be
+biased, says the directory, in his favor, or against him.
+For, in many instances, they keep up an appearance of
+justice and equity, at the same time that, in truth, they
+act in direct opposition to all the known laws of justice
+and equity. No words can express the concern and
+astonishment it gave me to hear, on such an occasion,
+the name of a friend for whom I had the greatest esteem
+and regard. The Inquisitor was apprised of it; and to
+give me an opportunity of practising what he had so often
+recommended to me, viz. conquering nature with the
+assistance of grace, he appointed me to apprehend the
+criminal, as he styled him, and to lodge him safe, before
+daylight, in the prison of the holy inquisition. I offered
+to excuse myself, but with the greatest submission, from
+being in any way concerned in the execution of that order;
+an order, I said, which I entirely approved of, but only
+wished it might be put in execution by some other person;
+for your lordship knows, I said, the connection. But the
+Inquisitor shocked at the word, said with a stern look
+and angry tone of voice, "What! talk of connections where
+the faith is concerned? There is your guard," (pointing
+to the Sbirri or bailiffs in waiting) "let the criminal
+be secured in St. Luke's cell," (one of the worst,)
+"before three in the morning." He then withdrew, and as
+he passed me said, "Thus, nature is conquered." I had
+betrayed some weakness or sense of humanity, not long
+before, in fainting away while I attended the torture of
+one who was racked with the utmost barbarity, and I had
+on that occasion been reprimanded by the Inquisitor for
+suffering nature to get the better of grace; it being an
+inexcusable weakness, as he observed, to be in any degree
+affected with the suffering of the body, however great,
+when afflicted, as they ever are in the Holy Inquisition,
+for the good of the soul. And it was, I presume, to make
+trial of the effect of that reprimand, that the execution
+of this cruel order was committed to me. As I could by
+no possible means decline it, I summoned all my resolution,
+after passing an hour by myself, I may say in the agonies
+of death, and set out a little after two in the morning
+for my unhappy friend's house, attended by a notary of
+the Inquisition, and six armed Sbirri. We arrived at the
+house by different ways and knocking at the door, a
+maid-servant looked out of the window, and asked who
+knocked. "The Holy Inquisition," was the answer, and at
+the same time she was ordered to awake nobody, but to
+come down directly and open the door, on pain of
+excommunication. At these words, the servant hastened
+down, half naked as she was, and having with much ado,
+in her great fright, opened the door, she conducted us
+as she was ordered to her master's chamber. She often
+looked very earnestly at me, as she knew me, and showed
+a great desire to speak with me; but of her I durst take
+no kind of notice. I entered the bed-chamber with the
+notary, followed by the Sbirri, when the lady awakening
+at the noise, and seeing the bed surrounded by armed men,
+screamed out aloud and continued screaming as out of her
+senses, till one of the Sbirri, provoked at the noise
+gave her a blow on the forehead that made the blood flow,
+and she swooned away. I rebuked the fellow severely, and
+ordered him to be whipped as soon as I returned to the
+Inquisition.
+
+In the mean time, the husband awakening, and seeing me
+with my attendants, cried out, in the utmost surprise,
+"MR. BOWER!" He said no more, nor could I for some time
+utter a single word; and it was with much ado that, in
+the end I so far mastered my grief as to be able to let
+my unfortunate friend know that he was a prisoner of the
+Holy Inquisition. "Of the Holy Inquisition!" he replied.
+"Alas I what have I done? My dear friend, be my friend
+now." He said many affecting things; but as I knew it
+was not in my power to befriend him, I had not the courage
+to look him in the face, but turning my back to him,
+withdrew, while he dressed, to a corner of the room, to
+give vent to my grief. The notary stood by, quite
+unaffected. Indeed, to be void of all humanity, to be
+able to behold one's fellow-creatures groaning under the
+most exquisite torments cruelty can invent, without being
+in the least affected with their sufferings, is one of
+the chief qualifications of an inquisitor, and what all
+who belong to the Inquisition must strive to attain to.
+It often happens, at that infernal tribunal, that while
+the unhappy, and probably innocent, person is crying out
+in their presence on the rack, and begging by all that
+is sacred for one moment's relief, in a manner one would
+think no human heart could withstand, it often happens,
+I say, that the inquisitor and the rest of his infamous
+crew, quite unaffected with his complaints, and deaf to
+his groans, to his tears and entreaties, are entertaining
+one another with the news of the town; nay, sometimes
+they even insult, with unheard of barbarity, the unhappy
+wretches in the height of their torment.
+
+To return to my unhappy prisoner. He was no sooner dressed
+than I ordered the Bargello, or head of the Sbirri, to
+tie his hands with a cord behind his back, as is practised
+on such occasions without distinction of persons; no more
+regard being paid to men of the first rank, when charged
+with heresy, than to the meanest offender. Heresy
+dissolves all friendship; so that I durst no longer look
+upon the man with whom I had lived in the greatest
+friendship and intimacy as my friend, or show him, on
+that account, the least regard or indulgence.
+
+As we left the chamber, the countess, who had been conveyed
+out of the room, met us, and screaming out in the most
+pitiful manner upon seeing her husband with his hands
+tied behind his back like a thief or robber, flew to
+embrace him, and hanging on his neck, begged, with a
+flood of tears, we would be so merciful as to put an end
+to her life, that she might have the satisfaction--the
+only satisfaction she wished for in this world, of dying
+in the bosom of the man from whom she had vowed never to
+part. The count, overwhelmed with grief, did not utter
+a single word. I could not find it in my heart, nor was
+I in a condition to interpose; and indeed a scene of
+greater distress was never beheld by human eyes. However,
+I gave a signal to the notary to part them, which he did
+accordingly, quite unconcerned; but the countess fell
+into a swoon, and the count was meantime carried down
+stairs, and out of the house, amid the loud lamentations
+and sighs of his servants, on all sides, for he was a
+man remarkable for the sweetness of his temper, and his
+kindness to all around him.
+
+Being arrived at the Inquisition, I consigned my prisoner
+into the hands of a gaoler, a lay brother of St. Dominic,
+who shut him up in the dungeon above-mentioned, and
+delivered the key to me. I lay that night at the palace
+of the Inquisition, where every counsellor has a room,
+and returned next morning the key to the inquisitor,
+telling him that his order had been punctually complied
+with. The inquisitor had been already informed of my
+conduct by the notary, and therefore, upon my delivering
+the key to him, he said, "You have acted like one who is
+at least desirous to overcome, with the assistance of
+grace, the inclinations of nature;" that is, like one
+who is desirous, by the assistance of grace, to metamorphose
+himself from a human creature into a brute or a devil.
+
+In the Inquisition, every prisoner is kept the first week
+of his imprisonment in a dark narrow dungeon, so low that
+he cannot stand upright in it, without seeing anybody
+but the gaoler, who brings him, EVERY OTHER DAY, his
+portion of bread and water, the only food allowed him.
+This is done, they say, to tame him, and render him, thus
+weakened, more sensible of the torture, and less able to
+endure it. At the end of the week, he is brought in the
+night before the board to be examined; and on that occasion
+my poor friend appeared so altered, in a week's time,
+that, had it not been for his dress, I should not have
+known him. And indeed no wonder; a change of condition
+so sudden and unexpected; the unworthy and barbarous
+treatment he had already met with; the apprehension of
+what he might and probably should suffer; and perhaps,
+more than anything else, the distressed and forlorn
+condition of his once happy wife, whom he tenderly loved,
+whose company he had enjoyed only six months, could be
+attended with no other effect.
+
+Being asked, according to custom, whether he had any
+enemies, and desired to name them, he answered, that he
+bore enmity to no man, and he hoped no man bore enmity
+to him. For, as in the Inquisition the person accused is
+not told of the charge brought against him, nor of the
+person by whom it is brought, the inquisitor asks him if
+he has any enemies, and desires him to name them. If he
+names the informer, all further proceedings are stopped
+until the informer is examined anew; and if the information
+is found to proceed from ill-will and no collateral proof
+can be produced, the prisoner is discharged. Of this
+piece of justice they frequently boast, at the same time
+that they admit, both as informers and witnesses, persons
+of the most infamous characters, and such as are excluded
+by all other courts. In the next place, the prisoner is
+ordered to swear that he will declare the truth, and
+conceal nothing from the holy tribunal, concerning himself
+or others, that he knows and the holy tribunal desires
+to know. He is then interrogated for what crime he has
+been apprehended and imprisoned by the Holy Court of the
+Inquisition, of all courts the most equitable, the most
+cautious, the most merciful. To that interrogatory the
+count answered, with a faint and trembling voice, that
+he was not conscious to himself of any crime, cognizable
+by the Holy Court, nor indeed by any other; that he
+believed and ever had believed whatever holy mother church
+believed or required him to believe. He had, it seems
+quite forgotten what he had unthinkingly said at the
+sight of the two friars. The inquisitor, therefore,
+finding that he did not remember or would not own his
+crime, after many deceitful interrogatories, and promises
+which he never intended to fulfil, ordered him back to
+his dungeon, and allowing him another week, as is customary
+in such cases, to recollect himself, told him that if he
+could not in that time prevail upon himself to declare
+the truth, agreeably to his oath, means would be found
+of forcing it from him; and he must expect no mercy.
+
+At the end of the week he was brought again before the
+infernal tribunal; and being asked the same questions,
+returned the same answers, adding, that if he had done
+or said anything amiss, unwittingly or ignorantly, he
+was ready to own it, provided the least hint of it were
+given him by any there present, which he entreated them
+most earnestly to do. He often looked at me, and seemed
+to expect--which gave me such concern as no words can
+express--that I should say something in his favor. But
+I was not allowed to speak on this occasion, nor were
+any of the counsellors; and had I been allowed to speak,
+I durst not have said anything in his favor; the advocate
+appointed by the Inquisition, and commonly styled, "The
+Devil's Advocate," being the only person that is suffered
+to speak for the prisoner. The advocate belongs to the
+Inquisition, receives a salary from the Inquisition, and
+is bound by an oath to abandon the defence of the prisoner,
+if be undertakes it, or not to undertake it, if he finds
+it cannot be defended agreeably to the laws of the Holy
+Inquisition; go that the whole is mere sham and imposition.
+I have heard this advocate, on other occasions, allege
+something in favor of the person accused; but on this
+occasion he declared that be had nothing to offer in
+defence of the criminal.
+
+In the Inquisition, the person accused is always supposed
+guilty, unless he has named the accuser among his enemies.
+And he is put to the torture if he does not plead guilty,
+and own the crime that is laid to his charge, without
+being so much as told what it is; whereas, in all other
+courts, where tortures are used, the charge is declared
+to the party accused before he is tortured; nor are they
+ever inflicted without a credible evidence of his guilt.
+But in the Inquisition, a man is frequently tortured upon
+the deposition of a person whose evidence would be admitted
+in no other court, and in all cases without hearing the
+charge. As my unfortunate friend continued to maintain
+his innocence, not recollecting what he had said, he was,
+agreeably to the laws of the Inquisition, put to the
+torture. He had scarcely borne it twenty minutes, crying
+out the whole time, "Jesus Maria!" when his voice failed
+him at once, and he fainted away. He was then supported,
+as he hung by his arms, by two of the Sbirri, whose
+province it is to manage the torture, till he returned
+to himself. He still continued to declare that he could
+not recollect his having said or done anything contrary
+to the Catholic faith, and earnestly begged they would
+let him know with what he was charged, being ready to
+own it if it was true.
+
+The Inquisitor was then so gracious as to put him in mind
+of what he had said on seeing the two Capuchins. The
+reason why they so long conceal from the party accused
+the crime he is charged with, is, that if he should be
+conscious to himself of his having ever said or done
+anything contrary to the faith, which he is not charged
+with, he may discover that too, imagining it to be the
+very crime he is accused of. After a short pause, the
+poor gentleman owned that he had said something to that
+purpose; but, as he had said it with no evil intention,
+he had never more thought of it, from that time to the
+present. He added, but with a voice so faint, as scarce
+could be heard, that for his rashness he was willing to
+undergo what punishment soever the holy tribunal should,
+think fit to impose on him; and he again fainted away.
+Being eased for a while of his torment, and returned to
+himself, he was interrogated by the promoter fiscal (whose
+business it is to accuse and to prosecute, as neither
+the informer nor the witnesses, are ever to appear,)
+concerning his intention. For in the Inquisition, it is
+not enough for the party accused to confess the fact, he
+must declare whether his intention was heretical or not;
+and many, to redeem themselves from the torments they,
+can no longer endure, own their intention was heretical,
+though it really was not My poor friend often told us,
+he was ready to say whatever he pleased, but as he never
+directly acknowledged his intention to have been heretical,
+as is required by the rules of the court, he was kept on
+the torture still, quite overcome with the violence of
+the anguish, he was ready to expire. Being taken down,
+he was carried quite senseless, back to his dungeon, and
+there, on the third day, death put an end to his sufferings.
+The Inquisitor wrote a note to his widow, to desire her
+to pray for the soul of her late husband, and warn her
+not to complain of the holy Inquisition, as capable of
+any injustice or cruelty. The estate was confiscated to
+the Inquisition, and a small jointure allowed out of it
+to the widow. As they had only been married six months,
+and some part of the fortune was not yet paid, the
+inquisitor sent an order to the Constantini family, at
+Ferno, to pay the holy office, and without delay, what
+they owed to the late Count Della Torre. The effects of
+heretics are all ipso facto confiscated to the Inquisition
+from the very day, not of their conviction, but of their
+crime, so that all donations made after that time are
+void; and whatever they may have given, is claimed by
+the Inquisition, into whatsoever hands it may have passed;
+even the fortunes they have given to their daughters in
+marriage, have been declared to belong to, and are claimed
+by the Inquisition; nor can it be doubted, that the desire
+of those confiscations is one great cause of the injustice
+and cruelty of that court.
+
+The death of the unhappy Count Della Torre was soon
+publicly known; but no man cared to speak of it, not even
+his nearest relations, nor so much as to mention his
+name, lest anything should inadvertently escape them that
+might be construed into a disapprobation of the proceedings
+of the most holy tribunal; so great is the awe all men
+live in of that jealous and merciless court.
+
+The deep impression that the death of my unhappy friend,
+the barbarous and inhuman treatment he had met with, and
+the part I had been obliged to act in so affecting a
+tragedy, made on my mind, got at once the better of my
+fears, so that, forgetting in a manner the dangers I had
+till then so much apprehended, I resolved, without further
+delay to put in execution the design I had formed, of
+quitting the Inquisition, and bidding forever adieu to
+Italy. To execute that design with some safety, I proposed
+to beg leave to visit the Virgin of Loretto, but thirteen
+miles distant, and to pass a week there; but in the mean
+time, to make the best of my way out of the reach of the
+Inquisition.
+
+Having, therefore, after many conflicts with myself,
+asked leave to visit the neighboring sanctuary, and
+obtained it, I set out on horseback the very next morning,
+leaving, as I proposed to keep the horse, his full value
+with the owner. I took the road to Loretto, but turned
+out of it a short distance from Recanati, after a most
+violent struggle with myself, the attempt appearing to
+me at that juncture, quite desperate and impracticable;
+and the dreadful doom reserved for me should I miscarry,
+presented itself to my mind in the strongest light. But
+the reflection that I had it in my power to avoid being
+taken alive, and a persuasion that a man in my situation
+might lawfully avoid it, when every other means failed
+him, at the expense of his life, revived my staggered
+resolution; and all my fears ceasing at once, I steered
+my course, leaving Loretto behind me, to Rocca Contrada,
+to Fossonbrone, to Calvi in the dukedom of Urbino, and
+from thence through the Romagna into Bolognese, keeping
+the by-roads, and at a good distance from the cities
+through which the high road passed.
+
+Thus I advanced very slowly, travelling in very bad roads,
+and often in places where there was no road at all, to
+avoid, not only the cities, and towns, but also the
+villages. In the mean time I seldom had any other support
+but some coarse provisions, and a very small quantity
+even, of them, that the poor shepherds, the countrymen
+or wood cleavers I met in those unfrequented by-places,
+could spare me. My horse fared not much better than
+myself; but, in choosing my sleeping-place I consulted
+his convenience as much as my own, passing the night
+where I found most shelter for myself, and most grass
+for him. In Italy there are very few solitary farm-houses
+or cottages, the country people all living together in
+villages; and I thought it far safer to lie where I could
+be in any way sheltered, than to venture into any of
+them. Thus I spent seventeen days before I got out of
+the ecclesiastical state; and I very narrowly escaped
+being taken or murdered, on the very borders of that
+state; it happened thus.
+
+I had passed two whole days without any kind of subsistence
+whatever, meeting with no one in the by-roads that could
+supply me with any, and fearing to come near any house,
+as I was not far from the borders of the dominions of
+the Pope. I thought I should be able to hold out till I
+got into the Modanese, where I believed I should be in
+less danger than while I remained in the papal dominions.
+But finding myself, about noon of the third day, extremely
+weak and ready to faint away, I came into the high road
+that leads from Bologna to Florence, a few miles distant
+from the former city, and alighted at a post house, that
+stood quite by itself. Having asked the woman of the
+house whether she had any victuals, and being told that
+she had, I went to open the door of the only room in the
+house, (that being a place where gentlemen only stop to
+change horses,) and saw to my great surprise, a placard
+pasted on it, with a minute description of my whole
+person, sad a promise of a reward of 900 crowns (about
+200 pounds English money) for delivering me up alive to
+the Inquisition, being a fugitive from that holy tribunal,
+and of 600 crowns for my head. By the same placard, all
+persons were forbidden, on pain of the greater
+excommunication, to receive or harbor, entertain, conceal,
+or screen me, or to be in any way aiding, or assisting
+me to make my escape. This greatly alarmed me, as the
+reader may well imagine; but I was still more frightened,
+when entering the room, I saw two fellows drinking there,
+who, fixing their eyes on me as soon as I went in,
+continued looking at me very steadfastly. I strove, by
+wiping my face and blowing my nose, and by looking out
+of the window, to prevent their having a full view of my
+features. But, one of them saying, "The gentleman seems
+afraid to be seen," I put up my handkerchief, and turning
+to the fellow, said boldly, "What do you mean you rascal?
+Look at me; am I afraid to be seen?" He said nothing,
+but looking again steadfastly at me, and nodding his
+head, went out, and his companion immediately followed
+him. I watched them, and seeing them, with two or three
+more, in close conference, and no doubt consulting whether
+they should apprehend me or not, I walked that moment
+into the stable, mounted my horse unobserved by them,
+and while they were deliberating in an orchard behind
+the house, rode off at full speed, and in a few hours
+got into the Modanese, where I refreshed both with food
+and rest, as I was there in no immediate danger, my horse
+and myself. I was indeed surprised to find that those
+fellows did not pursue me, nor can I in any other way
+account for it, but by supposing, what is not improbable,
+that, as they were strangers as well as myself, and had
+all the appearance of banditti or ruffians flying out of
+the dominions of the Pope, the woman of the house did
+not care to trust them with her horses. From the Modanese
+I continued my journey, more leisurely through the
+Parmesan, the Milanese, and part of the Venetian territory,
+to Chiavenna, subject to the Grisons, who abhor the very
+name of the Inquisition, and are ever ready to receive
+and protect all who, flying from it, take refuge, as many
+Italians do, in their dominions. Still I carefully
+concealed who I was, and whence I came, for, though no
+Inquisition prevails among the Swiss, yet the Pope's
+nuncio who resides at Lucerne, (a popish canton through
+which I was to pass,) might have persuaded the magistrate
+to stop me as an apostate and deserter from the order.
+
+Having rested a few days at Chiavenna, I resumed my
+journey quite refreshed, continuing it through the country
+of the Grisons, and the two small cantons of Ury and
+Underwald, to the canton of Lucerne. There I missed my
+way, as I was quite unacquainted with the country, and
+discovering a city at a distance, was advancing to it,
+but slowly, as I knew not where I was, when a countryman
+whom I met, informed me that the city before me was
+Lucerne. Upon that intelligence, I turned out of the road
+as soon as the countryman was out of sight, and that
+night I passed with a good natured shepherd in his cottage,
+who supplied me with sheep's milk, and my horse with
+plenty of grass. I set out early next morning, making my
+way westward, as I knew that Berne lay west of Lucerne.
+But, after a few miles, the country proved very mountainous,
+and having travelled the whole day over mountains I was
+overtaken among them by night. As I was looking out for
+a place where I might shelter myself during the night,
+against the snow and rain, (for it both snowed and rained,)
+I perceived a light at a distance, and making towards
+it, I got into a kind of foot-path, but so narrow and
+rugged that I was obliged to lead my horse, and feel my
+way with one foot, (having no light to direct me,) before
+I durst move the other. Thus, with much difficulty I
+reached the place where the light was, a poor little
+cottage, and knocking at the door, was asked by a man
+within who I was, and what I wanted? I answered that I
+was a stranger and had lost my way. "Lost your way!"
+exclaimed the man, "There is no way here to lose." I then
+asked him what canton I was in? and upon his answering
+that I was in the canton of Berne, I cried out transported
+with joy, "I thank God that I am." The good man answered,
+"And so do I." I then told him who I was, and that I was
+going to Berne but had quite lost myself by keeping out
+of all the high roads, to avoid falling into the hands
+of those who sought my destruction. He thereupon opened
+the door, received and entertained me with all the
+hospitality his poverty would admit of; regaled me with
+sour crout and some new laid eggs, the only provision he
+had, and clean straw with a kind of rug for a bed, he
+having no other for himself and wife. The good woman
+expressed as much good nature as her husband, and said
+many kind things in the Swiss language, which her husband
+interpreted to me in the Italian; for that language he
+well understood, having learned it in his youth, while
+servant in a public home on the borders of Italy, where
+both languages are spoken. I never passed a more comfortable
+night; and no sooner did I begin to stir in the morning,
+than the good man and his wife both came to know how I
+rested; and, wishing they had been able to accommodate
+me better, obliged me to breakfast on two eggs, which
+providence, they said, had sent them for that purpose.
+I took leave of the wife, who seemed most sincerely to
+wish me a good journey. As for the husband, be would by
+all means attend me to the high road leading to Berne;
+which road he said was but two miles distant from that
+place. But he insisted on my first going back with him,
+to see the way I had come the night before; the only way,
+he said, I could have possibly come from the neighboring
+canton of Lucerne. I saw it, and shuddered at the danger
+I had escaped; for I found I had walked and led my horse
+a good way along a very narrow path on the brink of a
+very dangerous precipice. The man made so many pertinent
+and pious remarks on the occasion, as both charmed and
+surprised me. I no less admired his disinterestedness
+than his piety; for, upon our parting, after he had
+attended me till I was out of all danger of losing my
+way, I could by no means prevail upon him to accept of
+any reward for his trouble. He had the satisfaction, he
+said, of having relieved me in the greatest distress,
+which was in itself a sufficient reward, and he wished
+for no other.
+
+Having at length got safe into French Flanders, I there
+repaired to the college of the Scotch Jesuits at Douay,
+and discovering myself to the rector, I acquainted him
+with the cause of my sudden departure from Italy, and
+begged him to give notice of my arrival, as well as the
+motives of my flight to Michael Angelo Tambuvini, general
+of the order, and my very particular friend.
+
+The rector wrote as I desired him, to the general, and
+he, taking no notice of my flight, in his answer, (for
+he could not disapprove, and did not think it safe to
+approve of it,) ordered me to continue where I was till
+further notice. I arrived at Douay early in May, and
+continued there till the beginning of July, when the
+rector received a second letter from the general,
+acquainting him that he had been commanded by the
+congregation of the Inquisition, to order me, wherever
+I was, back into Italy; to promise me, in their name,
+full pardon and forgiveness if I obeyed, but if I did
+not obey, to treat me as an apostate. He added, that
+the same order had been transmitted, soon after my flight,
+to the nuncios at the different Roman Catholic courts;
+and he, therefore, advised me to consult my own safety
+without further delay.
+
+Upon the receipt of the general's kind letter, the rector
+was of opinion that I should repair by all means, and
+without loss of time, to England, not only as the safest
+asylum I could fly to, in my present situation, but as
+a place where I should soon recover my native language,
+and be usefully employed, either there or in Scotland.
+The place being thus agreed on, and it being at the same
+time settled between the rector and me, that I should
+set out the very next morning, I solemnly promised, at
+his request and desire, to take no kind of notice, after
+my arrival in England, of his having been in any way
+privy to my flight, or the general's letter to him. This
+promise I have faithfully and honorably observed; and
+should have thought myself guilty of the blackest
+ingratitude if I had not observed it, being sensible
+that, had it been known at Rome, that, either the rector
+or general had been accessary to my flight, THE INQUISITION
+WOULD HAVE RESENTED IT SEVERELY IN BOTH. For although a
+Jesuit in France, in Flanders, or in Germany, is out of
+the reach of the Inquisition, the general is not; and
+the high tribunal not only have it in their power to
+punish the general himself, who resides constantly at
+Rome, but may oblige him to inflict what punishment they
+please on any of the order obnoxious to them.
+
+The rector went that very night out of town, and in his
+absence, but not without his privity, I took one of the
+horses of the college, early next morning, as if I were
+going for a change of air, being somewhat indisposed, to
+pass a few days at Lisle; but steering a different course,
+I reached Aire that night and Calais the next day. I was
+there in no danger of being stopped and seized at the
+prosecution of the Inquisition, a tribunal no less abhorred
+in France than in England. But being informed that the
+nuncios at the different courts had been ordered, soon
+after my flight, to cause me to be apprehended in Roman
+Catholic countries through which I must pass, as an
+apostate and deserter from the order, I was under no
+small apprehension of being discovered and apprehended
+as such even at Calais. No sooner, therefore, did I alight
+at the Inn, than I went down to the quay, and there as
+I was very little acquainted with the sea, and thought
+the passage much shorter than it is, I endeavored to
+engage some fishermen to carry me that very night, in
+one of their small vessels, over to England. This alarmed
+the guards of the harbor, and I should have been certainly
+apprehended as a person guilty, or suspected of some
+great crime, fleeing from justice, had not Lord Baltimore,
+whom I had the good luck to meet in the Inn, informed me
+of my danger, and pitying my condition, attended me that
+moment, with all his company, to the port, and conveyed
+me immediately on board his yacht. There I lay that night,
+leaving every thing I had but the clothes on my back, in
+the Inn; and the next day his Lordship set me ashore at
+Dover, from whence I came in the common stage to London.
+
+In the year 1706, the Inquisition at Arragon was broken
+up by the French troops, under the command of the Duke
+of Orleans. The Holy Inquisitors were driven from their
+beautiful house, and in answer to their indignant
+remonstrance were told that the king wanted the house to
+quarter his troops in, and they were therefore compelled
+to leave it immediately. The doors of the prisons were
+then thrown open, and among the four hundred prisoners
+who were set at liberty were sixty young women, very
+beautiful in person, and clad in the richest attire.
+
+Anthony Gavin, formerly one of the Roman Catholic priests
+of Saragossa, Spain, relates (in a book published by him
+after his conversion) that when travelling in France he
+met one of those women in the inn at Rotchfort; the son
+of the inn-keeper, formerly an officer in the French
+army, having married her for her great beauty and superior
+intelligence. In accordance with his request, she freely
+related to him the incidents of her prison life, from
+which we take the following extract:
+
+"Early the next morning, Mary got up, and told me that
+nobody was up yet in the house; and that she would show
+me the DRY PAN and the GRADUAL FIRE, on condition that
+I should keep it a secret for her sake as well as my own.
+This I promised, and she took me along with her, and
+showed me a dark room with a thick iron door, and within
+it an oven and a large brass pan upon it, with a cover
+of the same and a lock to it. The oven was burning at
+the time, and I asked Mary for what purpose the pan was
+there. Without giving me any answer, she took me by the
+hand and led me to a large room, where she showed me a
+thick wheel, covered on both sides with thick boards,
+and opening a little window in the center of it, desired
+me to look with a candle on the inside of it, and I saw
+all the circumference of the wheel set with SHARP RAZORS.
+After that she showed me a PIT FULL OF SERPENTS AND TOADS.
+Then she said to me, 'Now, my good mistress, I'll tell
+you the use of these things. The dry pan and gradual fire
+are for those who oppose the holy father's will, and for
+heretics. They are put naked and alive into the pan, and
+the cover of it being locked up, the executioner begins
+to put in the oven a small fire, and by degrees he
+augmenteth it, till the body is burned to ashes. The
+second is designed for those who speak against the Pope
+and the holy fathers. They are put within the wheel, and
+the door being locked, the executioner turns the wheel
+till the person is dead. The third is for those who
+contemn the images, and refuse to give the due respect
+and veneration to ecclesiastical persons; for they are
+thrown alive into the pit, and there they become the food
+of serpents and toads.' Then Mary said to me that another
+day she would show me the torments for public sinners
+and transgressors of the commandments of holy mother
+church; but I, in deep amazement, desired her to show me
+no more places; for the very thought of those three which
+I had seen, was enough to terrify me to the heart. So we
+went to my room, and she charged me again to be very
+obedient to all commands, for if I was not, I was sure
+to undergo the torment of the dry pan."
+
+Llorente, the Spanish historian and secretary-general of
+the Inquisition, relates the following incident: "A
+physician, Juan de Salas, was accused of having used a
+profane expression, twelve months before, in the heat of
+debate. He denied the accusation, and produced several
+witnesses to prove his innocence. But Moriz, the inquisitor
+at Valladolid, where the charge was laid, caused de Salas
+to be brought into his presence in the torture-chamber,
+stripped to his shirt, and laid on a LADDER or DONKEY,
+an instrument resembling a wooden trough, just large
+enough to receive the body, with no bottom, but having
+a bar or bars to placed that the body bent, by its own
+weight, into an exquisitely painful position. His head
+was lower than his heels, and the breathing, in consequence,
+became exceedingly difficult. The poor man, so laid, was
+bound around the arms and legs with hempen cords, each
+of them encircling the limb eleven times.
+
+"During this part of the operation they admonished him to
+confess the blasphemy; but he only answered that he had
+never spoken a sentence of such a kind, and then, resigning
+himself to suffer, repeated the Athanasian creed, and
+prayed to God and our Lady many times. Being still bound,
+they raised his head, covered his face with a piece of
+fine linen, and, forcing open the mouth, caused water to
+drip into it from an earthen jar, slightly perforated at
+the bottom, producing in addition to his sufferings from
+distension, a horrid sensation of choking. But again,
+when they removed the jar for a moment, he declared that
+he had never uttered such a sentence; and this he often
+repeated. They then pulled the cords on his right leg,
+cutting into the flesh, replaced the linen on his face,
+dropped the water as before, and tightened the cords on
+his right leg the second time; but still he maintained
+that he had never spoken such a thing; and in answer to
+the questions of his tormentors, constantly reiterated
+that he HAD NEVER SPOKEN THOSE WORDS. Moriz then pronounced
+that the said torture should be regarded as begun, but
+not finished; and De Salas was released, to live, if he
+could survive, in the incessant apprehension that if he
+gave the slightest umbrage to a familiar, he would be
+carried again into the same chamber, and be RACKED IN
+EVERY LIMB."
+
+Llorente also relates, from the original records, another
+case quite as cruel and unjust as the above. "On the 8th
+day of December, 1528, one Catalina, a woman of BAD
+CHARACTER, informed the inquisitors that, EIGHTEEN YEARS
+BEFORE she had lived in the house with a Morisco named
+Juan, by trade a coppersmith, and a native of Segovia;
+that she had observed that neither he nor his children
+ate pork or drank wine, and that, on Saturday nights and
+Sunday mornings they used to wash their feet, which
+custom, as well as abstinence from pork and wine, was
+peculiar to the Moors. The old man was at that time an
+inhabitant of Benevente, and seventy-one years of age.
+But the inquisitors at once summoned him into their
+presence, and questioned him at three several interviews.
+All that he could tell was, that he received baptism when
+he was forty-five years of age; that having never eaten
+pork or drunk wine, he had no taste for them; and that,
+being coppersmiths, they found it necessary to wash
+themselves thoroughly once a week. After some other
+examinations, they sent him back to Benevente, with
+prohibition to go beyond three leagues' distance from
+the town. Two years afterwards the inquisitor determined
+that he should be threatened with torture, IN ORDER TO
+OBTAIN INFORMATION THAT MIGHT HELP THEM TO CRIMINATE
+OTHERS. He was accordingly taken to Valladolid, and in
+a subterranean chamber, called the 'chamber, or dungeon,
+of torment,' stripped naked, and bound to the 'ladder.'
+This might well have extorted something like confession
+from an old man of seventy-one; but he told them that
+whatever he might say when under torture would be merely
+extorted by the extreme anguish, and therefore unworthy
+of belief; that he would not, through fear of pain,
+confess what had never taken place. They kept him in
+close prison until the next Auto de Fe, when he walked
+among the penitents, with a lighted candle in his hand,
+and, after seeing others burnt to death, paid the holy
+office a fee of four ducats, and went home, not acquitted,
+but released. He was not summoned again, as he died soon
+afterwards."
+
+It sometimes happened that an individual was arrested
+by mistake, and a person who was entirely innocent was
+tortured instead of the real or supposed criminal. A
+case of this kind Mr. Bower found related at length in
+the "Annals of the Inquisition at Macerata."
+
+"An order was sent from the high tribunal at Rome to all
+the inquisitors throughout Italy, enjoining them to
+apprehend a clergyman minutely described in that order.
+One Answering the description in many particulars being
+discovered in the diocese of Osimo, at a small distance
+from Macerata, and subject to that Inquisition, he was
+there decoyed into the holy office, and by an order from
+Rome SO RACKED AS TO LOSE HIS SENSES. In the mean time,
+the true person being apprehended, the unhappy wretch
+was dismissed, by a second order from Rome, but he never
+recovered the use of his senses, NOR WAS ANY CARE TAKEN
+OF HIM BY THE INQUISITION."
+
+It would be easy to fill a volume with such narratives
+as the above, but we forbear. We are not writing a history
+of the Inquisition. We simply wish to exhibit the true
+spirit by which the Romanists are actuated in their
+dealings with those over whom they have power. We therefore,
+in closing this chapter of horrors, beg leave to place
+before our readers one of the FATHERLY BENEDICTIONS with
+which, His Holiness, the Pope, dismisses his refractory
+subjects. Does it not show most convincingly what he
+would do here in America, if he had, among us, the power
+he formerly possessed in the old world, when the least
+inadvertent word might perchance seal the doom of the
+culprit?
+
+
+A POPISH BULL OK CURSE.
+
+"Pronounced on all who leave the Church of Rome. By the
+authority of God Almighty, the Father, Son and Holy Ghost,
+and the undefiled Virgin Mary, mother and patroness of
+our Saviour, and of all celestial virtues, Angels,
+Archangels, Thrones, Dominions, Powers, Cherubim and
+Seraphim, and of all the holy Patriarchs, Prophets, and
+of all the Apostles and Evangelists, of the holy innocents,
+who in the sight of the holy Lamb are found worthy to
+sing the new song of the Holy Martyrs and Holy Confessors,
+and of all the Holy Virgins, and of all the Saints,
+together with the Holy Elect of God,--MAY HE BE DAMNED.
+We excommunicate and anathematize him, from the threshold
+of the holy church of God Almighty. We sequester him,
+that he may be tormented, disposed, and be delivered over
+with Datham and Abiram, and with those who say unto the
+Lord, 'Depart from us, we desire none of thy ways;' as
+a fire is quenched with water, so let the light of him
+be put out forevermore, unless it shall repent him, and
+make satisfaction. Amen.
+
+"May the Father who creates man, curse him. May the Son,
+who suffered for us, curse him! May the Holy Ghost who
+is poured out in baptism, curse him! May the Holy Cross,
+which Christ for our salvation, triumphing over his
+enemies, ascended, curse him!
+
+"May the Holy Mary, ever Virgin and Mother of God, curse
+him! May all the Angels, Principalities, and Powers, and
+all heavenly Armies curse him! May the glorious band of
+the Patriarchs and Prophets curse him! "May St. John
+the Precursor, and St John the Baptist, and St. Peter
+and St Paul, and St. Andrew and all other of Christ's
+Apostles together curse him and may the rest of the
+Disciples and Evangelists who by their preaching converted
+the universe, and the Holy and wonderful company of
+Martyrs and Confessors, who by their works are found
+pleasing to God Almighty; may the holy choir of the Holy
+Virgins, who for the honor of God have despised the things
+of the world, damn him. May all the Saints from the
+beginning of the world to everlasting ages, who are found
+to be beloved of God, damn him!
+
+"May he be damned wherever he be, whether in the house
+or in the alley, in the woods or in the water, or in the
+church! May he be cursed in living or dying!
+
+"May he be cursed in eating and drinking, in being hungry,
+in being thirsty, in fasting and sleeping, in slumbering,
+and in sitting, in living, in working, in resting, and
+in blood letting! May he be cursed in all the faculties
+of his body!
+
+"May he be cursed inwardly and outwardly. May he be cursed
+in his hair; cursed be he in his brains, and his vertex,
+in his temples, in his eyebrows, in his cheeks, in his
+jaw-bones, in his nostrils, in his teeth, and grinders,
+in his lips, in his shoulders, in his arms, and in his
+fingers.
+
+"May he be damned in his mouth, in his breast, in his
+heart, and purtenances, down to the very stomach!
+
+"May he be cursed in his reins and groins, in his thighs
+and his hips, and in his knees, his legs and his feet,
+and his toe-nails!
+
+"May he be cursed in all his joints, and articulation of
+the members; from the crown of the head to the soles of
+his feet, may there be no soundness!
+
+"May the Son of the living God, with all the glory of
+his majesty, CURSE HIM! And may Heaven, with all the
+powers that move therein, rise up against him, and curse
+and damn him; unless he repent and make satisfaction!
+Amen! So be it. Be it so. Amen."
+
+Such was the CURSE pronounced on the Rev. Wm. Hogan, (a
+converted Roman Catholic priest) a few years since, in
+Philadelphia.
+
+As a further proof of the cruel, persecuting spirit of
+Catholicism, let us glance at a few extracts from their
+own publications.
+
+"Children," they say, "are obliged to denounce their
+parents or relations who are guilty of heresy; ALTHOUGH
+THEY KNOW THAT THEY WILL BE BURNT. They may refuse them
+all nourishment, and permit them to die with hunger; or
+they may KILL THEM as enemies, who violate the rights of
+humanity.--Escobar, Theolg. Moral, vol. 4, lib. 31, sec.
+2, precept 4, prop. 5, p. 239."
+
+"A man condemned by the Pope, may be killed wherever he
+is found."--La Croix, vol. 1, p. 294.
+
+"Children may kill their parents, if they would turn
+their children from the Popish faith." "If a judge decide
+contrary to law, the injured person may defend himself
+by killing the judge."--Fangundez Precept Decal, vol. 1,
+lib. 4, chap. 2, p. 501, 655, and vol. 2, lib. 8, chap.
+32; p. 390.
+
+"To secretly kill your calumniator, to avoid scandal, is
+justifiable."--Ayrault, Cens. p. 319.
+
+"You may kill before hand, any person who may put you to
+death, not EXCEPTING THE JUDGE, AND WITNESSES, because
+it is self-defence."--Emanuel Sa. Aphor, p. 178.
+
+"A priest may kill those who hinder him from taking
+possession of any Ecclesiastical office."--Arnicus, Num,
+131.
+
+"You may charge your opponent with false crime to take
+away his credit, as well as kill him."--Guimenius, prop,
+8, p. 86.
+
+"Priests may kill the laity to preserve their goods."--
+Nolina, vol. 3, disput. 16, p. 1786.
+
+"You may kill any man to save a crown."--Taberna, Synop.
+Theol. Tract, pars. 2, chap. 27, p. 256.
+
+"BY THE COMMAND OF GOD IT IS LAWFUL TO MURDER THE INNOCENT,
+TO ROB, AND TO COMMIT ALL KIND OF WICKEDNESS, BECAUSE HE
+IS THE LORD OF LIFE AND DEATH, AND ALL THINGS; AND THUS
+TO FULFILL HIS MANDATE IS OUR DUTY."--Alagona, Thorn.
+Aquin, Sum. Theol. Compend, Quest. 94, p. 230.
+
+Again, in the Romish Creed found in the pocket of Priest
+Murphy, who was killed in the battle of Arklow, 1798, we
+find the following articles. "We acknowledge that the
+priests can make vice virtue, and virtue vice, according
+to their pleasure.
+
+"We are bound to believe that the holy massacre was
+lawful, and lawfully put into execution, against
+Protestants, and likewise WE ARE TO CONTINUE THE SAME,
+PROVIDED WITH SAFETY TO OUR LIVES!
+
+"We are bound not to keep our oaths with heretics, though
+bound by the most sacred ties. We are bound not to believe
+their oaths; for their principles are damnation. We are
+bound to drive heretics with fire, sword, faggot, and
+confusion, out of the land; as our holy fathers say. if
+their heresies prevail we will become their slaves. We
+are bound to absolve without money or price, those who
+imbrue their hands in the blood of a heretic!" Do not
+these extracts show very clearly that Romanism can do
+things as bad as anything in the foregoing narrative?
+
+
+
+
+APPENDIX VI.
+
+ROMANISM OF THE PRESENT DAY.
+
+Whenever we refer to the relentless cruelties of the
+Romanists, we are told, and that, too, by the influential,
+the intelligent, those who are well-informed on other
+subjects, that "these horrid scenes transpired only in
+the 'dark ages;'" that "the civilization and refinement
+of the present age has so modified human society, so
+increased the milk of human kindness, that even Rome
+would not dare, if indeed she had the heart, to repeat
+the cruelties of by-gone days."
+
+For the honor of humanity we could hope that this opinion
+was correct; but facts of recent date compel us to believe
+that it is as false as it is ruinous to the best interests
+of our country and the souls of men. A few of these facts,
+gathered from unquestionable sources, and some of them
+related by the actors and sufferers themselves, we place
+before the reader.
+
+In November, 1854, Ubaldus Borzinski, a monk of the
+Brothers of Mercy, addressed an earnest petition to the
+Pope, setting forth the shocking immoralities practised
+in the convents of his order in Bohemia. He specifies
+nearly forty crimes, mostly perpetrated by priors and
+subpriors, giving time, place, and other particulars,
+entreating the Pope to interpose his power, and correct
+those horrible abuses.
+
+For sending this petition, he was thrown into a madhouse
+of the Brothers of Mercy, at Prague, where he still
+languishes in dreary confinement, though the only mark
+of insanity he ever showed was in imagining that the Pope
+would interfere with the pleasures of the monks.
+
+This Ubaldus has a brother, like minded with himself,
+also a member of the same misnamed order of monks, who
+has recently effected his escape from durance vile.
+
+John Evangelist Borzinski was a physician in the convent
+of the Brothers of Mercy at Prague. He is a scientific
+and cultivated man. By the study of the Psalms and Lessons
+from the New Testament, which make up a considerable part
+of the Breviary used in cloisters, he was first led into
+Protestant views. He had been for seventeen years resident
+in different cloisters of his order, as sick-nurse, alms
+gatherer, student, and physician, and knew the conventual
+life out and out. As he testifies: "There was little of
+the fear of God, so far as I could see, little of true
+piety; but abundance of hypocrisy, eye-service, deception,
+abuse of the poor sick people in the hospitals, such love
+and hatred as are common among the children of this world,
+and the most shocking vices of every kind."
+
+He now felt disgust for the cloister life, and for the
+Romish religion, and he sought, by the aid of divine
+grace, to attain to the new birth through the Word of
+God. Speaking of his change of views to a Prussian
+clergyman, he thus describes his conversion: "Look you,
+it was thus I became a Protestant. I found a treasure in
+that dustheap, and went away with it." This treasure he
+prized more and more. He then thought within himself, if
+these detached passages can give such light, what an
+illumination he must receive if he could read and understand
+the whole Bible.
+
+He did not, however, betray his dissatisfaction, but
+devoted himself to his professional duties with greater
+diligence. He might still have remained in the Order,
+his life hid with Christ in God, had not the hierarchy,
+under pretence of making reforms and restoring the
+neglected statutes of the Order, brought in such changes
+for the worse as led him to resolve to leave the order,
+and the Romish church as well. Following his convictions,
+and the advice of a faithful but very cautious clergyman,
+he betook himself to the territories of Prussia, where,
+on the 17th of January, 1855, he was received into the
+national church at Petershain, by Dr. Nowotny, himself
+formerly a Bohemian priest. This was not done till great
+efforts had been made to induce him to change his purpose,
+and also to get his person into the power of his
+adversaries. As he had now left the church of Rome, become
+an openly acknowledged member of another communion, he
+thought he might venture to return to his own country.
+Taking leave of his Prussian friends, to whom he had
+greatly endeared himself by his modesty and his lively
+faith, he went back to Bohemia, with a heart full of
+peace and joy.
+
+He lived for some time amidst many perplexities, secluded
+in the house of his parents at Prosnitz, till betrayed
+by some who dwelt in the same habitation. On the 6th of
+March he was taken out of bed, at eight, by the police,
+and conveyed first to the cloister in Prosnitz, where he
+suffered much abuse, and from thence to the cloister in
+Prague. Here the canon Dittrich, "Apostolical Convisitator
+of the Order of the Brothers of Mercy," justified all
+the inhuman treatment he had suffered, and threatened
+him with worse in case he refused to recant and repent.
+Dittrich not only deprived him of his medical books, but
+told him that his going over to Protestantism was a
+greater crime than if he had plundered the convent of
+two thousand florins. He was continually dinned with the
+cry, "Retract, retract!" He was not allowed to see his
+brother, confined in the same convent, nor other friends,
+and was so sequestered in his cell as to make him feel
+that he was forgotten by all the world.
+
+He managed, through some monks who secretly sympathized
+with him, to get a letter conveyed occasionally to Dr.
+Nowotny. These letters were filled with painful details
+of the severities practised upon him. In one of them he
+says, "My only converse is with God, and the gloomy walls
+around me." He was transferred to a cell in the most
+unwholesome spot, and infested with noisome smells not
+to be described. Close by him were confined some poor
+maniacs, sunk below the irrational brutes.
+
+Under date of April 23d he writes: "Every hour, in this
+frightful dungeon seems endless to me. For many weeks
+have I sat idle in this durance, with no occupation but
+prayer and communion with God." His appeals to civil
+authority and to the Primate of Hungary procured him no
+redress, but only subjected him to additional annoyances
+and hardships. His aged father, a man of four-score years,
+wept to see him, though of sound understanding, locked
+up among madmen; and when urged to make his son recant,
+would have nothing to do with it, and returned the same
+day to his sorrowful home. As he had been notified that
+he was to be imprisoned for life, he prayed most earnestly
+to the Father of mercies for deliverance; and he was
+heard, for his prayers and endeavors wrought together.
+The sinking of his health increased his efforts to escape;
+for, though he feared not to die, he could not bear the
+thought of dying imprisoned in a mad-house, where he knew
+that his enemies would take advantage of his mortal
+weakness to administer their sacraments to him, and give
+out that he had returned to the bosom of the church, or
+at least to shave his head, that he might be considered
+as an insane person, and his renunciation of Romanism as
+the effect of derangement of mind. Several plans of escape
+were projected, all beset with much difficulty and danger.
+The one he decided upon proved to be successful.
+
+On Saturday, the 13th of October, at half-past nine in
+the evening, he fastened a cord made of strips of linen
+to the grate of a window, which grate did not extend to
+the top. Having climbed over this, he lowered himself
+into a small court-yard. He had now left that part of
+the establishment reserved for the insane, and was now
+in the cloistered part where the brethren dwelt. But here
+his fortune failed him. He saw at a distance a servant
+of the insane approaching with a light; and with aching
+heart and trembling limbs, by a desperate effort, climbed
+up again. He returned to his cell, concealing his cord,
+and laid himself down to rest.
+
+On the following Monday, he renewed his efforts to escape.
+He lowered himself, as before, into the little court-yard;
+but being weak in health and much shaken in his nervous
+system by all he had suffered in body and mind, he was
+seized with palpitation of the heart and trembled all
+over, so that he could not walk a step. He laid down to
+rest and recover his breath. He felt as if he could get
+no further. "But," he says in his affecting narrative,
+"My dear Saviour to whom I turned in this time of need,
+helped me wonderfully. I felt now, more than ever in my
+life, His gracious and comforting presence, and believed,
+in that dismal moment, with my whole soul, His holy word;"
+"My grace is sufficient for thee; for my strength is made
+perfect in weakness."
+
+Borzinski now arose, pulled off his boots, and though
+every step was made with difficulty, he ascended the
+stairs leading to the first story. He went along the
+passage way until he came to a door leading into corridors
+where the cloister brethren lodged. But the trembling
+fit came over him again, with indescribable anguish, as
+he sought to open the door with a key with which he had
+been furnished. He soon rallied again, and, like a
+spectre, gliding by the doors of the brethren, who occupied
+the second and third corridors, many of whom had lights
+still burning, he came with his boots in one hand, and
+his bundle in the other, to a fourth passage way, in
+which was an outside window he was trying to reach. The
+cord was soon fastened to the window frame, yet still in
+bitter apprehension; for this window was seldom opened,
+and opened hard, and with some noise. It was also only
+two steps distant from the apartment of the cloister
+physician, where there was a light, and it was most likely
+that, on the first grating of the window, he would rush
+out and apprehend the fugitive.  However the window was
+opened without raising any alarm, and now it was necessary
+to see that no one was passing below; for though the spot
+is not very much frequented, yet the streets cross there,
+and people approach it from four different directions.
+During these critical moments, one person and another
+kept passing, and poor Borzinski tarried shivering in
+the window for near a quarter of an hour before he ventured
+to let himself down. While he was waiting his opportunity
+he heard the clock strike the third quarter after nine
+and knew that he had but fifteen minutes to reach the
+house where he was to conceal himself, which would be
+closed at ten. When all was still, he called most fervently
+on the Saviour, and grasping the cord, slid down into
+the street. He could scarce believe his feet were on the
+ground. Trembling now with joy and gratitude rather than
+fear, he ran bareheaded to his place of refuge, where he
+received a glad welcome. Having changed his garb, and
+tarried till three o'clock in the morning, he took leave
+of his friends and passing through the gloomy old capital
+of Bohemia, he reached the Portzitscher Gate, in order
+to pass out as early as possible. Just then a police
+corporal let in a wagon, and Borzinski, passed out
+unchallenged. It is needless to follow him further in
+his flight. We have given enough, of his history to prove
+that conventual establishments are at this moment what
+they ever have been--dangerous alike to liberty and life.
+AMERICAN AND FOREIGN CHRISTIAN UNION.
+
+In place of labored arguments we give the following
+history of personal suffering as strikingly illustrative of
+the spirit of Romanism at the present day.
+
+
+
+
+APPENDIX VII
+
+NARRATIVE OP SIGNORINA FLORIENCIA D' ROMANI, A
+NATIVE OF THE CITY OF NAPLES.
+
+I was born in the year 1826, of noble and wealthy parents.
+Our mansion contained a small chapel, with many images,
+sacred paintings, and a neatly furnished mass altar. My
+father was a man of the world. He loved the society of
+fashionable men. As he lived on the rents and income of
+his estates, he had little to do, except to amuse himself
+with his friends. My mother, who was of as mild and sweet
+disposition, loved my father very dearly, but was very
+unhappy the most of the time because my father spent so
+much of his time in drinking with his dissolute companions,
+card playing, and in balls, parties, theatres, operas,
+billiards, &c. Father did not intend to be unkind to my
+mother, for he gave her many servants, and abundance of
+gold, horses, carriages and grooms, and said frequently
+in my hearing, that his wife should be as happy as a
+princess. Such was the state of society in Italy that
+men thought their wives had no just reason to complain,
+so long as they were furnished with plenty of food,
+raiment and shelter.
+
+One of my father's most intimate friends was the very
+Rev. Father Salvator, a Priest of the order of St. Francis;
+he wore the habit of the order, his head was about half
+shaved. The sleeves of his habit were very large at the
+elbow; in these sleeves he had small pockets, in which
+he usually carried his snuff box, handkerchief, and purse
+of gold. This priest was merry, full of fun and frolic;
+he could dance, sing, play cards, and tell admirably
+funny stories, such as would make even the devils laugh
+in their chains.
+
+Such was the influence and power this Franciscan had over
+my father and mother, that in our house, his word was
+law. He was our confessor, knew the secrets and sins,
+and all the weak points of every mind in the whole
+household. My own dear mother taught me to read before
+I was seven years of age. As I was the only child, I was
+much petted and caressed, indeed, such was my mother's
+affection for me that I was seldom a moment out of her
+sight. There was a handsome mahogany confessional in our
+own chapel. When the priest wanted any member of the
+household to come to him to confession, he wrote the name
+on a slate that hung outside the chapel door, saying that
+he would hear confessions at such a time to-morrow. Thus,
+we would always have time for the full examination of
+our consciences. Only one at a time was ever admitted
+into the chapel, for confessional duty, and the priest
+always took care to lock the door inside and place the
+key in his sleeve pocket. My mother and myself were
+obliged to confess once a week; the household servants,
+generally once a month. My father only once a year, during
+Lent, when all the inhabitants of seven years, and upwards,
+are obliged to kneel down to the priests, in the
+confessional, and receive the wafer God under the severest
+penalties. Woe to the individual who resists the
+ecclesiastical mandate.
+
+When I was about fourteen years of age, I was sent to
+the Ursuline Convent, to receive my education. My dear
+mother would have preferred a governess or a competent
+teacher to teach me at home but her will was but a mere
+straw in the hands of our confessor and priestly tyrant.
+It was solely at the recommendation of the confessor,
+that I was imprisoned four years in the Ursuline Convent.
+As my confessor was also the confessor of the convent,
+he called himself my guardian and protector, and recommended
+me to the special care of the Mother Abbess, and her holy
+nuns, the teachers, who spent much of their time in the
+school department. As my father paid a high price,
+quarterly, for my tuition and board, I had a good room
+to myself, my living was of the best kind, and I always
+had wine at dinner. The nuns, my teachers, took much more
+pains to teach me the fear of the Pope, bishops and
+confessors, than the fear of God, or the love of virtue.
+In fact, with the exception of a little Latin and
+embroidery, which I learned in those four years, I came
+out as ignorant as I was before, unless a little hypocrisy
+may be called a useful accomplishment. For, of all human
+beings on earth, none can teach hypocrisy so well as the
+Romish priests and nuns. In the school department young
+ladies seldom have much to complain of, unless they are
+charity scholars; in that case the poor girls have to
+put up with very poor fare, and much hard work, hard
+usage and even heavy blows; how my heart has ached for
+some of those unfortunate girls, who are treated more
+like brutes, than human beings, because they are orphans,
+and poor. Yet they in justice are entitled to good
+treatment, for thousands of scudi (dollars) are sent as
+donations to the convents for the support of these orphans,
+every year, by benevolent individuals. So that as poor
+and unfortunate as these girls are, they are a source of
+revenue to the convents.
+
+For the first three years of my convent life, I passed
+the time in the school department, without much anxiety
+of mind. I was gay and thoughtless, my great trouble was
+to find something to amuse myself, and kill time in some
+way. Though I treated all the school-mates with kindness,
+and true Italian politeness, I became intimate with only
+one. She was a beautiful girl, from the dukedom of Tuscany.
+She made me her confidant, and told me all her heart.
+Her parents were wealthy, and both very strict members
+of the Romish Church. But she had an aunt in the city of
+Geneva, who was a follower of John Calvin, or a member
+of the Christian church of Switzerland. This aunt had
+been yearly a visitor at her father's house. She being
+her father's only sister, an affectionate intimacy was
+formed between the aunt and niece. The aunt, being a very
+pious, amiable woman, felt it her duty to impress the
+mind of the niece, with the superiority of the religion
+of the holy bible over popish traditions; and the truth
+of the Scriptures soon found its way to the heart of my
+young friend. But her confessor soon found out that some
+change was going on in her mind, and told her father.
+There were only two ways to save her soul from utter
+ruin; one was to give her absolution and kill her before
+she got entirely out of the holy mother church; the other,
+was to send her to the Ursuline convent at Naples, where
+by the zeal and piety of those celebrated nuns, she might
+be secured from further heresy.
+
+From this, the best friend of my school days, I learned
+more about God's word, and virtue, and truth, and the
+value of the soul, than from all other sources. There
+was a garden surrounded by a high wall, in which we
+frequently walked, and whispered to each other, though
+we trembled all the while for fear our confessor would
+by some means, find out that we looked upon the Romish
+church as the Babylon destined to destruction, plainly
+spoken of by St. John the revelator.
+
+My young friend stood in great fear of the priests; she
+trembled at the very sight of one.
+
+Her aunt had read to her the history and sufferings of
+the persecuted Protestants of Europe. She was a frail,
+and timid girl, yet such was the depth of her piety and
+the fervor of her religious faith, that she often declared
+to me that she would prefer death to the abandonment of
+those heavenly principles she had embraced, which were
+the source of her joy and hope. Her aunt gave her a pocket
+New Testament, in the Italian language, which she prized
+above all the treasures of earth, and carried with her
+carefully, wherever she went. I borrowed it and read it
+every opportunity I had. Several chapters I learned by
+heart. I took much pains to commit to memory all I could
+of the blessed book, for in case of our separation, I
+knew not where I could obtain another. My god-father
+who was a bishop, called to see me on my fifteenth birth
+day, and presented me with a splendid gold watch and
+chain richly studded with jewels, made in England, and
+valued at 200 scudi, saying that he had it imported
+expressly for my use. I had also several diamond articles
+of jewelry, presents I had received from my father from
+time to time. I had also, in my purse, 100 scudi in gold,
+which I had saved from my pin money. All the above
+property, I should have cheerfully given for a copy of
+the Holy Bible, in my own beautiful Italian language. A
+few months after I received the rich present from the
+Bishop, he called with my father and my confessor to see
+me. My heart almost came into my mouth when I saw them
+alight from my father's carriage, and enter the chapel
+door of the convent. Very soon the lady porter came to
+me and said, "Signorina, you are wanted in the parlor."
+
+As my Tuscan friend had taught me to pray, and ask the
+Lord Jesus for grace and strength, I walked into my room,
+locked the door, and on my knees, called upon the Lord
+to save me from becoming a nun--for I knew then it was
+a determination on the part of the Abbess, bishop and
+confessor, that I should take the veil. I was the only
+child, and heiress of an immense fortune, of course, too
+good a prize to be lost. After a short and fervent prayer
+to my Lord and Saviour, I walked down to see what was to
+be my doom. I kissed my father's cheek, and kissed the
+hands of the Bishop and confessor--yet my very soul
+revolted from the touch of these whited sepulchres. All
+received me with great cordiality, yea, even more than
+usual affection. Soon after our meeting, my father asked
+permission of the Bishop to speak to me privately and
+taking me into a small room, said to me, "My dear daughter,
+you are not aware of the great misfortune that has recently
+come upon your father. While I was excited with wine at
+the card-table last evening, betting high and winning
+vast sums of money, I so far forgot myself and my duty
+to the laws of the country, that I called for a toast,
+and induced a number of my inebriated companions to drink
+the health of Italian liberty, and we all drank and gave
+three cheers for liberty and a liberal constitution. A
+Benedictine Friar being present, took all our names to
+the Commissary General, and offered to be a witness
+against us in the King's Court. As this is my first and
+only offence, the holy Bishop your god-father offers on
+certain conditions, to visit Rome immediately on my
+behalf, and secure the mediation of the holy Father Pius
+IX. Your venerable god-father has great influence at
+Rome, being a special favorite with his holiness, and
+his holiness can obtain any favor he asks of King Ferdinand.
+So if you will only consent to take the Black Veil, your
+father will be saved from the State prison."
+
+This was terrible news to my young and palpitating heart.
+It was the first heavy blow that I had experienced in
+this vale of tears. I did not speak for some minutes; I
+could not. My trembling bosom heaved like the waves of
+the ocean before the blast. My veins were almost bursting;
+my hands and feet became as cold as marble, and when I
+attempted to speak my words seemed ready to choke me to
+death. I thought my last hour had come. I fell upon my
+knees and called upon God for mercy and help. My father,
+thinking I had gone mad, was greatly alarmed. The Bishop
+and confessor, who were anxiously waiting the result of
+my father's proposition, hearing my father weep and sob
+aloud, came in to see what the matter was. In the midst
+of my prayer, I fainted away, and became entirely
+unconscious. When I came to myself, I found myself on
+the bed. As I opened my eyes, it all seemed like a dream.
+The abbess spoke to me very kindly, and sprinkled my bed
+with holy water, and at the same time laid a large bronze
+crucifix on my breast, saying that Satan must be driven
+from my soul, for had it not been for the devil, I would
+have leaped for joy, and not fainted when father mentioned
+the black veil. "No," said the holy mother, "had it not
+been for the devil you would rejoice to take the holy
+black veil blessed by the Holy Madonna and the blessed
+saints Clara and Theresa. It is a holy privilege that
+very few can enjoy on earth. Yea, my daughter, there
+can not be a greater sin in the sight of the Madonna and
+the blessed saints, than to reject a secluded life. Yea,"
+said the crafty old nun, (who was thinking much more
+about my gold, than my soul,) "I never knew a young lady
+who had the offer of becoming a nun and rejected it, who
+ever came to a good end. If they refuse, and marry, they
+generally die in child-bed with the first child, or they
+will marry cruel husbands, who beat them and kill them
+by inches. Therefore, dear daughter, let me most
+affectionately warn you as you have had the honor of
+being selected by the holy Bishop and our holy confessor
+to the high dignity and privilege of a professed nun, of
+the order of St. Ursula, reject it not at your peril. Be
+assured, heaven knows how to punish such rebellion."
+
+My head ached so violently at the time, and I was so
+feverish that I begged the old woman to send for my
+mother, and to talk to me no more on the subject of the
+black veil, but to drop it until some future time. In my
+agony on account of the foul plot against my liberty, my
+virtue, and my gold, I felt such a passion of rage come
+upon me, that had I absolute power for the moment I would
+have cast every Abbess, Pope, Bishop and Priest into the
+bottomless pit. May the Lord forgive me, but I would
+have done it at that time with a good will. The greatest
+comfort I now had was reading my Tuscan friend's New
+Testament, or hearing it read by her when we had a chance
+to be by ourselves, which was not very often. In the
+evening of the same day of my illness, father and mother
+came to see me, and Satan came also in the shape of the
+confessor; so that I had not a moment alone with my dear
+parents. The confessor feared my determined opposition
+to a convent's life, for he had previous to this, several
+times in the confessional, dropped hints to me on the
+great happiness, purity, serenity and joy of all holy
+nuns. But I always told him I would not be a nun for the
+world. I should be so good, it would kill me in a short
+time. "No, no, father," said I, "I WILL NOT BE A NUN."
+
+Father spoke to me again of his great misfortune--told
+me that his trial would come on in a few days and that
+he was now at liberty on a very heavy bail; that the
+Bishop was only waiting my answer to start immediately
+for the holy city, and throw himself at the feet of the
+holy Pope to procure father's unconditional pardon from
+the King. I said "my dear father, how long will you be
+imprisoned if you do not get a pardon?" "From two to five
+years," he replied. "My daughter, it is my first offence,
+and I have witnesses to prove that the priest who appeared
+against me, urged me to drink wine several times after
+I had drank a large quantity, and was the direct cause
+of my saying what I did." Now it all came to me, that
+the whole of it was a plot, a Jesuitical trick, to get
+my father in the clutches of the law, and then make a
+slave of me for life through my sympathy for my dear
+father.
+
+The vile priests knew that I loved my father most ardently;
+in fact, my father and mother were the only two beings
+on earth that I did love. My mother I loved most tenderly,
+but my affection for my father was of a different kind.
+I loved him most violently, with all the ardor of my
+soul. Mother seemed all the home to me; but father was
+to me all the world beside. My father was all the brother
+I had. He would frequently come home, and get me to go
+out into the garden and play with him, just as though he
+was my brother. There we would swing, run, jump and
+exercise in several healthy games, common in our climate.
+He never gave me an unkind word or an unkind reproof. If
+I did say anything wrong, he would take me to my mother
+and say, "Clara, here I bring you a prisoner, let her be
+kept on bread and water till dinner time." Even when
+mother had displeased him about some trifle, so that he
+had not a smile for her, he always had a smile for his
+Flora. Even now, while I write, a chill comes over my
+frame, while I think of that vile Popish plot. I said to
+my father, "You shall not be imprisoned if I can prevent
+it; at the same time I do not see any great gain, comfort
+or profit in having your only daughter put in prison for
+life, without the hope of liberty ever more, to save you
+from two years imprisonment."
+
+At these words, the eyes of the confessor flashed like
+lurid lightnings; his very frame shook, as though he had
+the fever and ague. Truth seemed so strange to the priest,
+that he found it hard of digestion. Father and mother
+both wept, but made no reply. The idea of putting their
+only child in a dungeon for life, though it might be done
+in the sacred name of religion, did not seem to give them
+much comfort "Father," said I, "I wish to see you at ten
+o'clock to-morrow morning, without fail--I wish to see
+you alone; don't bring mother or any one else with you.
+You shall not go to prison, all will yet be well." On
+account of this reasonable request, to see my father
+alone, the confessor arose in a terrible rage and left
+the apartment As quick as the mad priest left us to
+ourselves, I told my father my plan, or what I would like
+to do with his permission. My plan was, for my mother
+and myself to get into our carriage and drive to the
+palace of King Ferdinand and make him acquainted with
+all the truth; for I was aware from what I had heard,
+that the King had heard only the priest's side of the
+story. My father stood in such fear of the priests that
+he only consented to my plan with great reluctance, saying
+that we ought first to make our plan known to the confessor,
+lest he should be offended. To this my mother responded,
+saying, "My daughter, it would be very wrong for us to
+go to the King, or take any step without the advice of
+our spiritual guide." Here, I felt it to be my duty to
+reveal to my deceived parents some of the secrets of the
+confessional, though I might, in their estimation, be
+guilty of an unpardonable sin by breaking the seal of
+iniquity. I revealed to my parents the frequent efforts
+of the priest to obtain my consent to take the veil, and
+that I had opposed from first to last, every argument
+made use of to rob me of the society of my parents, of
+my liberty, and of everything I held dear on earth. As
+to the happiness of the nuns so much talked of by the
+priests, from what I had seen in their daily walk and
+general deportment, I was fully convinced that there was
+no reality in it; they were mere slaves to their superiors,
+and not half so happy as the free slaves on a plantation
+who have a kind master. My parents saw my determination
+to resist to the death every plan for my imprisonment in
+the hateful nunnery. Therefore they promised that I
+should have the opportunity to see the King on the morrow
+in company with my mother.
+
+On the following day, at twelve o'clock, we left the
+convent in our carriage for the palace. We were very
+politely received by the gentleman usher, who conducted
+us to seats in the reception-room. After sending our
+cards to the king, we waited nearly one hour before he
+made his appearance. His majesty received us with much
+kindness, raised us immediately from our knees, and
+demanded our business. I was greatly embarrassed at first,
+but the frank and cordial manner of the sovereign soon
+restored me to my equilibrium, and I spoke freely in
+behalf of my dear father. The king heard me through very
+patiently, with apparent interest, and said, "Signorina,
+I am inclined to believe you have spoken the truth; and
+as your father has always been a good loyal subject, I
+shall, for your sake, forgive him this offence; but let
+him beware that henceforth, wine or no wine, be does not
+trespass against the laws of the kingdom, for a second
+offence I will not pardon. Go in peace, signoras, you
+have my royal word."
+
+We thanked his majesty, and returned to our home with
+the joyful tidings. O, how brief was our joy! My father,
+who had been waiting the result of our visit to the palace
+with great impatience, received us with open arms, and
+pressed us to his heart again and again.
+
+I was so excited that, long before we got to him, I cried
+out, "All is well, all is well, father. A pardon from
+the king! Joy, joy!" We drove home, and father went
+immediately to spread the happy news amongst his friends.
+All our faithful domestics, including my old affectionate
+nurse, were so overjoyed at the news that they danced
+about like maniacs. My father was always a very indulgent
+and liberal master, furnished his servants with the best
+of Italian fare, plenty of fresh beef, wine, and macaroni.
+We had scarcely got rested, when our tormenter, the
+confessor, came into our room and said, "Signoras, what
+is the meaning of all this fandango and folly amongst
+the servants? ARE THE HERETICS ALL KILLED, that there
+should be such joy, or has the queen been delivered of
+a son, an heir to the throne?"
+
+My dear mother was now as pale as death, and silent, for
+she saw that the priest was awfully enraged; for, although
+he feigned to smile, his smile was similar to that of
+the hyena when digging his prey out of the grave. The
+priest's dark and villainous visage had the effect of
+confirming in my mother's mind all the truth regarding
+the plot to enslave me for life, and secure all my father's
+estate to the pockets of the priests. The confessor was
+now terribly mad, for two obvious reasons: one was because
+he was not received by us with our usual cordiality and
+blind affection; the other, because, by the king's pardon,
+I was not under the necessity to sacrifice my liberty
+and happiness for life to save my father from prison;
+and what tormented him the most was, that he believed
+that I, though young, could understand and thwart his
+hellish plans. As my mother trembled and was silent,
+fearing the priest was cursing her and her only daughter
+in his heart,--for the priests tell such awful stories
+about the effects of a priest's curse that the great mass
+of the Italian people fear it more than the plague or
+any earthly misfortune.
+
+The popish priests declare that St. Peter is the doorkeeper
+of the great city of God, the heavenly Jerusalem, that
+he has the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and has received
+strict orders not to admit any soul, under any
+circumstances, who has been cursed by a holy priest,
+unless that curse has been removed by the same priest in
+the tribunal of penance. I was obliged to speak to his
+reverence, and I felt so free, so happy in Christ as my
+only hope, that I opened my mind to the priest very
+freely, and told him what I thought of him and his plot.
+"Sir priest," said I, "I shall never return to the convent
+to stay long. As soon as the time for my education ends,
+I shall return to liberty and domestic life. I am not
+made of the proper material to make a nun of. I love the
+social domestic circle; I love my father and mother, and
+all our domestics, even the dogs and the cats, pigeons,
+and canaries, the fish-ponds, play-grounds, gardens,
+rivers, and landscapes, mountain and ocean,--all the
+works of God I love. I shall live out of the convent to
+enjoy these things; therefore, reverend sir, if you value
+my peace and good-will, never speak to me or my parents
+on the subject of my becoming a nun in any convent. I
+shall prefer death to the loss of my personal liberty."
+
+I was so decided, and had received such strength and
+grace from heaven, that the priest was dumbfounded,--my
+smooth stone out of the sling had hit him in the right
+place. After much effort to appear bland and good-natured,
+he drew near my chair, seized my hand, and said, "My dear
+daughter, you mistake me. I love you as a daughter, I
+wish only your happiness. Your god-father, the holy
+Bishop, does not intend that you shall remain a common
+nun more than a year. After the first year you shall be
+raised to the highest dignity in the convent. You shall
+be the Lady Superior, and all the nuns shall bow at your
+feet, and implicitly obey your commands.
+
+"The Lady Superior of St. Clara is now very old, and his
+lordship wishes soon to fill her place. For that purpose
+he has selected his adopted daughter. Your talents,
+education, wealth, and high position in society, eminently
+fit you for one of the highest dignities on earth."
+
+"A thousand thanks for the kindness of my lord Bishop,"
+said I; "but your reverence has not altered my mind in
+the least. I can never bow down to the feet of any Lady
+Superior, neither will I ever consent to see a single
+human being degraded at my feet. The holy Bible says,
+'Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt
+thou serve.'" "Bible, my daughter!" exclaimed the priest,
+"Where did you see that dangerous book? Know you not that
+his holiness the Pope has placed it in the Index
+Expurgatorius, because it has been the means of the
+damnation of millions of souls? Not because it is in
+itself a bad book, but because it is a theological work,
+prepared only for the priests and ministers of our holy
+religion. Therefore, it is always a very dangerous book
+in the hands of women or laymen, who wrest the Scriptures
+to their own destruction."
+
+"Well, reverend sir," I replied, "you seem determined to
+differ from the Lord Jesus and his apostles. I read in
+the New Testament that we should search the Scriptures
+because they testify of Christ. And one of the apostles,
+I don't remember which, said, 'all scripture is given by
+the inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine
+and for instruction in righteousness.' Now, reverend sir,
+if the people have souls, as well as the priests, why
+should they not read the word of God which speaks of
+Christ and is profitable for instruction?"
+
+"You are almost a heretic!" exclaimed the priest, "and
+you talk very much like one." His countenance changed to
+a pale sickly hue, as he said, "My daughter, where did
+you get that dangerous book? If you have, it in your
+possession, give it to me, and I will bless you, and pray
+for you to the blessed Madonna that she may save you from
+the infernal pit of heresy."
+
+"I do not own the blessed book," said I, "but I wish I
+did. I would give one hundred scudi in gold for a copy
+of the New Testament. I borrowed a copy from a friend,
+and returned it to the owner again. But I understand that
+there are copies to be had in London, and when I have a
+good opportunity I shall send for a copy, if I can do it
+unbeknown to any one."
+
+"Enough, enough!" exclaimed the priest. "I shall be in
+the tribunal of penance at six o'clock P.M.; there I
+shall expect to meet you. You need pardon immediately,
+and spiritual advice. Should you die as you now are
+without absolution, you would be lost and damned forever.
+I tremble for you, my dear daughter, seeing that the
+devil has got such a powerful hold of you. It may even
+be absolutely necessary to kill the body to save your
+soul; for should you relapse again into heresy after due
+penance for this crime has been performed, it would be
+impossible to renew you again to repentance, seeing you
+crucify the Lord and the Madonna afresh, and put them to
+an open shame."
+
+Here my mother fainted and shook like an aspen leaf.
+But God gave me strength, and I said in a moment that as
+his reverence thought my sins so great, I would not go
+to any man, no, not even to the Pope; I would go to God
+alone, and leave my cause in his hands, life or death.
+"Therefore, reverend sir, I shall save you from all
+further trouble in attending the confessional any more
+on my account. From henceforth no earthly power shall
+drag me alive and with my consent to the tribunal of
+penance."
+
+"Woman!" exclaimed the priest furiously, "are you mad?
+There are ten thousand devils in you, and we must drive
+them out by some means." After this discharge of priestly
+venom, the priest left in a rage giving the door a terrible
+slam, which awoke my mother from her sorrowful trance.
+During the whole conversation, such was the electrical
+power of the priest over my mother's weak and nervous
+system, that if she attempted to say a word in my behalf,
+the keen, snakish black eye of the priest would at once
+make her tremble and quail before him, and the half
+uttered word would remain silent on her lips. The priest
+went at once in search of my father. He came home boiling
+over with rage, saying he wished I had never been born.
+He cursed the day of my birth. The cause of all this
+paternal fury upon my poor devoted head was the foul
+misrepresentations of my father confessor, who was now
+in league with the Bishop, both determined to shut me up
+in a prison convent, or end my mortal career.
+
+My poor mother remained mute and heart-broken. My sweet
+mother; never did she utter one word of unkindness to
+me; her very look to the last was one of gentleness and
+love. But my father loved honor and reputation amongst
+men above all other things. The idea of being the father
+of an accursed heretic, tormented his pride, and he being
+suspected of heresy himself caused him to be forsaken by
+many of his proud friends and acquaintances. He was even
+insulted in the streets by the numerous Lazaroni, with
+the epithet of Maldito Corrobonari, so that I lost my
+father's love. And when the confessor told him there was
+no other way to save me from hell than an entire life of
+penance in a convent, he heartily and freely gave his
+consent. Mother, my own sweet mother, my only remaining
+friend, turned as pale as death, but was enabled to say
+a word in my behalf.
+
+I saw that my earthly doom was sealed; there was not a
+single voice in all Naples to save me from imprisonment
+for life. Not a tongue in four hundred thousand that
+would dare speak one word in my behalf. Father commanded
+me to get ready to leave his house forever that very
+night, saying the carriage and confessor would be on hand
+to take me away at eight o'clock P.M., by moonlight. I
+got on my knees and begged my father as a last request
+that he would allow me to remain three days with my
+mother, but he refused. Said he, "That is now beyond my
+power. Not an hour can you remain after eight o'clock."
+
+As I knew not when I should see my Tuscan friend again,
+I begged the privilege of seeing her for a few moments.
+I was anxious to ask her prayers and sympathy, and to
+put her on her guard, for should the priests discover
+her New Testament, they would punish her as they did me,
+or as they intended to do to me. But this favor was denied
+me, and I could not write to her, for all letters of the
+scholars in the convents, are opened under the pretence
+to prevent them from receiving love-letters. The Romish
+church keeps all her dark plans a secret, but never allows
+any secret to be kept from the priests.
+
+I went into my room to bid farewell to my home forever.
+I fell on my knees and prayed to God for his dear Son's
+sake to help me, to give me patience, and to keep me from
+the sin of suicide. The more I thought of my utterly
+unprotected situation and of the savage disposition of
+my foes, the priests, the more I thought of the propriety
+of taking my own life, rather than live in a dungeon all
+my days. Such was the power of superstition over our
+domestics that they looked upon me as one accursed of
+the church, a Protestant heretic, and not one of them
+would take my hand or bid me good bye. At tea-time I was
+not allowed to sit at table with father, mother, and the
+confessor, as formerly. But I had my supper sent up to
+my room.
+
+A short time after the bell rang for vespers, the carriage
+being ready, my father and the confessor with myself and
+one small trunk got into the best seats inside, and rode
+off at a rapid rate. I kept my veil over my face, and
+said not a word neither did I shed a single tear; my
+sorrow, and indignation was too deep for utterance or
+even for tears. The priest and my father uttered not a
+word. Perhaps my father's conscience made him ashamed
+of such vile work--that of laying violent hands on a
+defenceless girl of eighteen years of age, for no crime
+whatever, only the love of liberty and pure Bible religion.
+But if the priest was silent, his vile countenance
+indicated a degree of hellish pleasure and satisfaction.
+Never did piratical captain glory more in seeing a rich
+prize along side with all hands killed and out of the
+way, than my reverend confessor; yet a short time before
+he said he loved me as a daughter. Yes, he did love me,
+as the wolf loves the lamb, as the cat loves the mouse
+and as the boa constrictor the beautiful gazelle. To my
+momentary satisfaction we entered the big gate of St.
+Ursula, for although I knew I should suffer there perhaps
+even death, there was some satisfaction in seeing a few
+faces that I had seen in my gay and happy days, now alas!
+forever gone by! I was somewhat grieved by the cold
+reception I received. All seemed to look upon me with
+horror. But none of these things moved me; I looked to
+God for strength, for I felt that He alone could nerve
+me for the conflict. The hardest blow of all was, my dear
+father left me at the mercy of the priest without one
+kind look or word. He did not even shake hands with me,
+nor did he say farewell.
+
+Oh Popery, what a mysterious power is thine! Thou canst
+in a few hours destroy powerful love which it took long
+years to cement in loving hearts. When my father had left
+and I heard the porter lock the heavy iron gate I felt
+an exquisite wretchedness come over me. I would have
+given worlds for death at that moment. In a few moments
+the priest rung a bell, and the old Jezebel the mother
+Abbess made her appearance. "Take this heretic, Holy
+Mother, and place her in confinement in the lower regions;
+GIVE HER BREAD AND WATER ONCE IN TWENTY-FOUR HOURS, THE
+WATER THAT YOU HAVE WASHED YOUR SACRED FEET IN, NO OTHER;
+give her straw to sleep on, but no pillow. Take all her
+clothing away and give her a coarse tunic; one single
+coarse garment to cover her nakedness, but no shoes. She
+has grievously sinned against the holy mother church,
+and now she mercifully imposes upon her years of severe
+penance, that her body of sin may be destroyed and her
+soul saved after suffering one million of years in holy
+purgatory. Our chief duty now, holy mother, in order to
+save this lost soul from mortal sin will be to examine
+her carefully every, day to ascertain if possible what
+she most dislikes, or what is most revolting to her flesh,
+that whatever it may be, she, must be compelled to perform
+it whatever it may cost. Let a holy wax candle burn in
+her cell at night, until further orders. And let the
+Tuscan heretic be treated in the same way. They are both
+guilty of the same crimes." At the word "Tuscan heretic,"
+possessing the spirit of Christ that I knew on earth.
+Yet how true it is that misery loves company; there was
+even satisfaction in being near my unfortunate friend
+though our sufferings might be unutterable. Still I was
+unhappy in the thought that she was suffering on my
+account. Had I never said a word about borrowing a New
+Testament, she would never have been suspected as being
+the direct cause of my conversion to the truth, and of
+my renunciation of the vile confessional.
+
+I was somewhat puzzled to know what kind of a place was
+meant by the lower regions; I had never heard of these
+regions before. But soon two women in black habits with
+their faces entirely covered excepting two small holes
+for the eyes to peep through, came to me and without
+speaking, made signs for me to follow them. I did so
+without resistance, and soon found myself in an under-ground
+story of the infernal building. "There is your cell,"
+said the cowled inquisitors, "look all around, see every
+thing, but speak not; no not for your life. The softest
+whisper will immediately reach the ears of the Mother
+Abbess, and then you are loaded with heavy chains until
+you die, for there must be no talking or whispering in
+this holy retreat of penance. And," said my jailor further,
+"take off your clothes, shoes and stockings, and put on
+this holy coarse garment which will chafe thy flesh but
+will bless thy soul. Holy St. Francis saved many souls
+by this holy garment."
+
+As resistance was worse than useless, I complied, and
+soon found my poor feet aching with the cold on the bare
+stone floor. I was soon made to feel the blessing of St.
+Francis with a vengeance. My sufferings were indescribable.
+It seemed as though ten thousand bees had stung me in
+every part. I never closed my eyes for several nights.
+I laid on my coarse straw and groaned and sighed for
+death to come and relieve me of my anguish. As soon as
+the holy wax candle was left with me I took it in my hand
+and went forth to survey my dungeon; but I did not enjoy
+my ramble. In one of the cells, I found my Tuscan
+friend--that dear Christian sister--in great agony, having
+had on the accursed garment for several days. Her body
+was one entire blister, and very much inflamed. Her bones
+were racked with pain, as with the most excruciating
+inflammatory rheumatism. We recognized each other; she
+pointed to heaven as if to say 'trust in the Lord, my
+sister, our sufferings will soon be over.' I kissed my
+hand to her and returned again to my cell. I saw other
+victims half dead and emaciated that made my heart sick.
+I refrained from speaking to any one for I feared my
+condition, wretched as it was, might be rendered even
+worse, if possible by the fiends who had entire power
+over me. "O my God!" said I to myself, "why was I born?
+O give my soul patience to suffer every pain."
+
+On the fourth day of my imprisonment the jailor brought
+me some water and soap, a towel, brush and comb, and the
+same clothes I wore when I entered the foul den. They
+told me to make haste and prepare myself to appear before
+the holy Bishop. Hope revived in my soul, for I always
+thought that my god-father had some regard for me, and
+had now come to release me from the foul den I was in.
+Cold water seemed to afford much relief to my tortured
+body. I made my toilet as quick as I could in such a
+place. My feet were so numb and swollen that it was
+difficult for me to get my shoes on. At last the Bishop
+arrived as I supposed, and I was conducted--not into
+his presence as I expected, but into that of my bitterest
+enemy, the confessor. At the very sight of the monster,
+I trembled like a reed shaken by the wind. The priest
+walked to each of the doors, locked them, put the keys
+into a small writing desk, locked it, took out the key
+and placed it carefully in his sleeve pocket. This he
+did to assure me that we were alone, that not one of the
+inmates could by any means disturb for the present the
+holy meditations of the priest. He bade me take a seat
+on the sofa by him. In kind soft words he said to me,
+that if I was only docile and obedient, he would cause
+me to be treated like a princess, and that in a short
+time I should have my liberty if I preferred to return
+to the world. At the same time he attempted to put his
+arm around my waist. In a moment I was on my feet. While
+he was talking love to me, I was looking at two large
+alabaster vases full of beautiful wax flowers; one of
+them was as much as I could lift. Without one thought
+about consequences, I seized the nearest vase and threw
+it with all the strength I had at the priest's head. He
+fell like a log and uttered one or two groans. The vase
+was broken. It struck the priest on the right temple,
+close to the ear. For a moment I listened to see if any
+one were coming. I then looked at the priest, and saw
+the blood running out of his wound. I quaked with fear
+lest I had killed the destroyer of my peace. I did not
+intend to kill him, I only wished to stun him, that I
+might take the keys, open the door and run, for the back
+door of the priest's room led right into a back path
+where the gates were frequently opened daring the day
+time. This was about twelve o'clock, and a most favorable
+moment for me to escape. In a moment I had searched the
+sleeve pocket of the priest, found the key and a heavy
+purse of gold which I secured in my dress pocket. I opened
+the little writing desk and took out the key to the back
+door. I saw that the priest was not dead, and I had not
+the least doubt from appearances, but that he would soon
+come to. I trembled for fear he might wake before I could
+get away. I thought of my dear Tuscan sister in her
+wretched cell, but I could not get to her without being
+discovered. There was no time to be lost. I opened the
+door with the greatest facility and gained the opening
+into the back path. I locked the door after me, and
+brought the key with me for a short distance, then placed
+all the keys tinder a rock. I had no hat but only a
+black veil. I threw that over my head after the fashion
+of Italy and gained the outer gate. There were masons
+at work near the gate which was open and I passed through
+into the street without being questioned by any one.
+
+As I had not a nun's dress on, no one supposed I belonged
+to the Institution. I walked down directly to the sea
+coast. I could speak a few English words which I had
+learned from some English friends of my father. Before
+I got to where the boats lay I saw a gentleman whom I
+took to be an English or American gentleman. He had a
+pleasant face, looked at me very kindly, saw my pale
+dejected face and at once felt a deep sympathy for me.
+As I appeared to be in trouble and needed help, he extended
+his hand to me and said in tolerable good Italian, "Como
+va' le' signorina?" that is "How do you do young lady?"
+I asked him what was his country. "Me," said he, "Americano,
+Americano, capitano de Bastimento." (American captain of
+a ship.) "Signor Capitano," said I, "I wish to go on
+board your ship and see an American ship." "Well," said
+he, "with a great deal of pleasure; my ship lies at
+anchor, my men are waiting; you shall dine with me,
+Signorina."
+
+I praised God in my soul for this merciful providence of
+meeting a friend, though a stranger, whose face seemed
+to me so honest and so true. Any condition, even honest
+slavery, would have been preferred by me at that time to
+a convent. The American ship was the most beautiful thing
+I ever saw afloat; splendid and neat in all her cabin
+arrangements. The mates were polite, and the sailors
+appeared neat and happy. Even the black cook showed his
+beautiful white teeth, as though he was glad to see one
+of the ladies of Italy. Poor fellows! Little did they
+know at that time what peril I was in should I be found
+out and taken back to my dungeon again. I informed the
+captain of my situation, of having just escaped from a
+convent into which I had been forced against my will. I
+told him I would pay him my passage to America, if he
+would hide me somewhere until the ship was well out to
+sea. He said I had come just in time, for he was only
+waiting for a fair wind, and hoped to be off that evening.
+"I have," said he, "a large number of bread-casks on
+board, and two are empty. I shall have you put into one
+of these, in which I shall make augur-holes, so that you
+can have plenty of fresh air. Down in the hold amongst
+the provisions you will be safe." I thanked my kind friend
+and requested him to buy me some needles, silk, and cotton
+thread, and some stuff for a couple of dresses, and
+one-piece of fine cotton, so that I might make myself
+comfortable during the voyage.
+
+After I ate my dinner, the men called the captain and
+said there were several boats full of soldiers coming to
+the ship, accompanied by the priests. "Lady," exclaimed
+the captain, "they are after you. There is not a moment
+to be lost. Follow me," he continued. "And, Mr. Smith,
+tell the men to be careful and not make known that there
+is a lady on board."
+
+An awful cold chill ran over me. I followed my friend
+quickly, and soon found myself coiled in a large cask.
+The captain coopered the head, which was missing, and
+made holes for me to get the air; but the perspiration
+ran off my face in a stream. Lots of things were piled
+on the cask, so that I had hard work to breathe; but such
+was my fear of the priests that I would rather have
+perished in the cask than be returned to die by inches.
+
+The captain had been gone but a short time when I heard
+steps on deck, and much noise and confusion. As the
+hatches were open, I could hear very distinctly. After
+the whole company were on deck, the captain invited the
+priests and friars, about twenty in number, to walk down
+to the cabin, and explain the cause of their visit. They
+talked through an interpreter, and said that "a woman of
+bad character had robbed one of the churches of a large
+amount of gold, had attempted to murder one of the holy
+priests, but they were happy to say that the holy father,
+though badly wounded, was in a fair way of recovery.
+This woman is young, but very desperate, has awful raving
+fits, and has recently escaped from a lunatic institution.
+When her fits of madness come on they are obliged to put
+her into a straight jacket, for she is the most dangerous
+person in Italy. A great reward is offered for her by
+her father and the government--five thousand scudi. Is
+not this enough to tempt one to help find her? She was
+seen coming towards the shipping, and we want the privilege
+of searching your ship."
+
+"Gentlemen," said the captain, "I do not know that the
+Italian authorities have any right to search an American
+ship, under the stars and stripes of the United States,
+for we do not allow even the greatest naval power on
+earth to do that thing. But if such a mad and dangerous
+woman as you have described should by any means have
+smuggled herself on board my ship, you are quite welcome
+to take her away as soon as possible, for I should be
+afraid of my life if I was within one hundred yards of
+such an unfortunate creature. If you can get her into
+your lunatic asylum, the quicker the better; and the five
+thousand scudi will come in good time, for I am thinking
+of building me a larger ship on my return home. Now,
+gentlemen, come; I will assist you, for I should like to
+see the gold in my pocket." The captain opened all his
+closets and secret places, in the cabin and forecastle
+and in the hold; everything was searched, all but the
+identical bread-cask in which I was snugly coiled.
+
+After something like half an hour's search, the soldiers
+of King Ferdinand and the priests of King Pope left the
+ship, satisfied that the crazy nun was not on board; for,
+judging the captain by themselves, they thought he
+certainly would have given up a mad woman for the sake
+of five thousand scudi in gold, and for the safety of
+his own peace and comfort. A few moments after the Pope's
+friends had left, the excellent benevolent captain came
+down, and speedily and gently knocking off a few hoops
+with a hammer, took the head out, and I was free once
+more to breathe God's free air. I lifted my trembling
+heart in thanksgiving, while tears of gratitude rolled
+down my cheeks. Yet, as we were still within the reach
+of the guns of the papal forts, my heart was by no means
+at rest. But the good captain assured me repeatedly that
+all danger was past, for he had twenty-five men on board,
+all true Protestants, and he declared that all the priests
+of Naples would walk over their dead bodies before they
+should reach his vessel a second time. "And besides,"
+said the captain, "there are two American men-of-war in
+port, who will stand up for the rights of Americans. They
+have not yet forgotten Captain Ingraham, of the United
+States ship St. Louis, and his rescue from the Austrian
+papists of the Hungarian patriot, Martin Kozsta." The
+captain wisely refused to purchase any needles or thread
+for me on shore, or any articles of ladies' dress, for
+fear of the Jesuitical spies, who might surmise something
+and cause further trouble. But he kindly furnished me
+with some goods he had purchased for his own wife, and
+there were needles and silk enough on board, so that I
+soon cut and made a few articles that made me very
+comfortable during our voyage of thirty-two days to
+London.
+
+Early the next morning we sailed out of the beautiful
+harbor of Naples, with a fair wind. The beautiful ship
+seemed to fly over the blue sea. I staid on deck gazing
+at my native city as long as I could. I thought then of
+my once happy home, of my poor, broken-hearted mother,
+of my unhappy father. Although he had cast me off through
+the foul play of Jesuitical intrigue, my love for my dear
+father remained the same. "Farewell, my dear Italy," I
+said to myself. "When, my poor native land, wilt thou be
+happy? Never, never, so long as the Pope lives, and his
+wicked, murderous priests, to curse thee by their power."
+
+After we got out into the open sea, the motion of the
+ship made me feel very sick, and I was so starved out
+before I came on board, that what good provisions I ate
+on board did not seem to agree with me. My stomach was
+in a very bad state, for while I was in the lower regions
+of the convent I ate only a small quantity of very stale
+hard bread once in twenty-four hours, at the ringing of
+the vesper bells every evening, and the water given me
+was that in which the holy Mother Abbess had washed her
+sacred feet. But I must give the holy mother credit for
+one good omission--she did not use any soap.
+
+The captain gave me a good state-room which I occupied
+with an English lady passenger. This good lady was
+accustomed to the sea, therefore, she did not suffer any
+inconvenience from sea-sickness; but I was very sick, so
+that I kept my berth for five days. This good Protestant
+lady was very kind and attentive during the whole passage,
+and kindly assisted me in getting my garments made up on
+board. On our arrival in London, the captain said that he
+would sail for America in two weeks time, and very kindly
+offered me a free passage to his happy, native land; and
+I could not persuade him to take any money for my passage
+from Naples, nor for the clothing he had given me.
+
+My fellow passenger being wealthy, and well acquainted
+with people in England, took me to her splendid home, a
+few miles from London. At her residence I was introduced
+to a young French gentleman, a member of the Evangelical
+protestant church in France, and a descendant of the
+pious persecuted Huguenots. This gentleman speaks good
+English and Italian, having enjoyed the privilege of a
+superior education. His fervent prayers at the family
+altar morning and evening made a very deep impression on
+my mind. He became deeply interested in my history, and
+offered to take me to France, after I should become his
+lawful wife.
+
+Though I did not like the idea of choosing another popish
+country for my residence, yet as my friend assured me
+that I should enjoy my protestant religion unmolested,
+I gave him my hand and my heart. My lady fellow passenger
+was my bridesmaid. We were married by a good protestant
+minister. My husband is a wealthy merchant--gives me
+means and opportunities for doing good. Home is precious
+in a foreign land. Our home is one of piety and peace
+and happiness. The blessed Bible is read by us every day.
+Morning and evening we sing God's praise, and call upon
+the name of the Lord. Our prayer is that God may deliver
+beloved France and Italy from the curse of popery.
+
+Another proof of the persecuting spirit of Rome is
+furnished by the "Narrative of Raffaele Ciocci, formerly
+a Benedictine Monk, but who now 'comes forth from
+Inquisitorial search and torture, and tells us what he
+has seen, heard and felt.'" We can make but a few extracts
+from this interesting little volume, published by the
+American and Foreign Christian Union, who,--to use their
+own language--"send it forth as a voice of instruction
+and warning to the American people. Let the facts be
+heard and read. They are not to be set aside by an apology
+for the dark ages, nor an appeal to the refinement of
+the nineteenth century. Here is Rome, not as she WAS in
+the midnight of the world, but as she IS at the present
+moment. There is the same opposition to private judgment
+--the same coercive measures--the same cruel persecution--
+the same efforts to crush the civil and religious liberties
+of her own subjects, for which she has ever been
+characterized."
+
+Ciocci, compelled at an early age to enter the Catholic
+College--forced, notwithstanding his deep disgust and
+earnest remonstrance, to become a monk--imprisoned--
+deceived--the victim of priestly artifice and fraud, at
+length becomes a Christian. He is of course thrown into
+a deeper dungeon; and more exquisite anguish inflicted
+upon him that he may be constrained to return to the
+Romish faith. Of his imprisonment he says, "We traversed
+long corridors till we arrived at the door of an apartment
+which they requested me to enter, and they themselves
+retired. On opening the door I found myself in a close
+dark room, barely large enough for the little furniture
+it contained, which consisted of a small hard bed, hard
+as the conscience of an inquisitor, a little table cut
+all over, and a dirty ill-used chair. The window which
+was shut and barred with iron resisted all my efforts to
+open it My heart sunk within me, and I began to cogitate
+on the destiny in store for me." The Jesuit Giuliani
+entering his room, he asked that the window might be
+opened for the admission of light and air. Before the
+words were finished he exclaimed in a voice of thunder,
+"How! wretched youth, thou complainest of the dark, whilst
+thou art living in the clouds of error? Dost thou desire
+the light of heaven, while thou rejectest the light of
+the Catholic faith?"
+
+Ciocci saw that remonstrance was useless, but he reminded
+his jailer that he had been sent there for three days,
+to receive instruction, not to be treated as a criminal.
+
+"For three days," he resumed, counterfeiting my tone of
+voice, "for three days! That would be nothing. The dainty
+youth will not forsooth, be roughly treated; it remains
+to be seen whether he desires to be courteously entertained.
+Be converted, be converted, condemned soul! Fortunate is
+it for thee that thou art come to this place. THOU WILT
+NEVER quit it excepting with the real fruits of repentance!
+Among these silent shades canst thou meditate at thy
+leisure upon the deplorable state into which thou hast
+fallen. Woe unto thee, if thou refusest to listen to the
+voice of God, who conducts souls into solitude that he
+may speak with them." "So saying," he continues, "he
+abruptly left me. I remained alone drooping under the
+weight of a misfortune, which was the more severe, because
+totally unexpected. I stood, I know not how long, in the
+same position, but on recovering from this lethargy, my
+first idea was of flight. But this thought was at once
+abandoned. There was no possibility of flight. Without
+giving a minute account of the manner in which I passed
+my wearisome days and nights in this prison, let it
+suffice to say that they were spent in listening to
+sermons preached to me four times a day by the fathers
+Giuliani and Rossini, and in the most gloomy reflections.
+
+"In the mean time the miseries I endured were aggravated
+by the heat of the season, the wretchedness of the chamber,
+scantiness of food, and the rough severity of those by
+whom I was occasionally visited. Uncertainty as to when
+this imprisonment would be at an end, almost drove me
+wild, and the first words I addressed to those who
+approached me were, 'Have the kindness to tell me when
+I shall be permitted to leave this place?' One replied,
+'My son, think of hell.' I interrogated another; the
+answer was, 'Think my son, how terrible is the death of
+the sinner!' I spoke to a third, to a fourth, and one
+said to me, 'My son, what will be your feeling, if, on
+the day of judgment you find yourself on the left hand
+of God?' the other, 'Paradise, my son, Paradise!' No one
+gave me a direct answer; their object appeared to be to
+mistify and confound me. After the first few days, I
+began to feel most severely the want of a change of
+clothing. Accustomed to cleanliness, I found myself
+constrained to wear soiled apparel. * * * For the want
+of a comb, my hair became rough and entangled. After the
+fourth day my portion of food was diminished; a sign,
+that they were pressing the siege, that it was their
+intention to adopt both assault and blockade--to conquer
+me by arms, or induce me to capitulate through hunger.
+I had been shut up in this wretched place for thirteen
+days, when, one day, about noon, the Father Mislei, the
+author of all my misery, entered my cell.
+
+"At the sight of this man, resentment overcame every
+other consideration, and I advanced towards him fully
+prepared to indulge my feelings, when he, with his usual
+smile, expressed in bland words his deep regret at having
+been the cause of my long detention in this retreat.
+'Never could I have supposed,' said he, 'that my anxiety
+for the salvation of your soul would have brought you
+into so much tribulation. But rest assured the fault is
+not entirely mine. You have yourself, in a great degree,
+by your useless obstinacy, been the cause of your
+sufferings. Ah, well, we will yet remedy all.' Not
+feeling any confidence in his assurance, I burst out into
+bitter invectives and fierce words. He then renewed his
+protestations, and clothed them with such a semblance of
+honesty and truth, that when he ended with this tender
+conclusion, 'Be assured, my son, that I love you,' my
+anger vanished. * * *
+I lost sight of the Jesuit, and thought I was addressing
+a man, a being capable of sympathising in the distresses
+of others. 'Ah, well, father,' said I, 'I need some one
+on whom I can rely, some one towards whom I can feel
+kindly; I will therefore place confidence in your words.'"
+After some further conversation, Ciocci was asked if he
+wished to leave that place. "If I desire it!" he replied,
+"what a strange question! You might as well ask a condemned
+soul whether he desires to escape from hell!" At these
+words the Jesuit started like a goaded animal, and,
+forgetting his mission of deceiver, with, knit brows and
+compressed lips, he allowed his ferocious soul for one
+moment to appear; but, having grown old in deceit, he
+immediately had the circumspection to give this movement
+of rage the appearance of religious zeal, and exclaimed,
+"What comparisons are these? Are you not ashamed to assume
+the language of the Atheist? By speaking in this way you
+clearly manifest how little you deserve to leave this
+place. But since I have told you that I love you, I will
+give you a proof of it by thinking no more of those
+irreligious expressions; they shall be forgotten as though
+they had never been spoken. Well, the Cardinal proposes
+to you an easy way of returning to your monastery." "What
+does be propose?" "Here is the way," said he, presenting
+me with a paper: "copy this with your own hand; nothing
+more will be required of you." "I took the paper with
+convulsive eagerness. It was a recantation of my faith,
+there condemned as erroneous. * * *
+Upon reading this, I shuddered, and, starting to my feet,
+in a solemn attitude and with a firm voice, exclaimed,
+'Kill me, if you please; my life is in your power; but
+never will I subscribe to that iniquitous formulary.'
+The Jesuit, after laboring in vain to persuade me to his
+wishes, went away in anger. I now momentarily expected
+to be conducted to the torture. Whenever I was taken from
+my room to the chapel, I feared lest some trap-door should
+open beneath my feet, and therefore took great care to
+tread in the footsteps of the Jesuit who preceded me. No
+one acquainted with the Inquisition will say that my
+precaution was needless. My imagination was so filled
+with the horrors of this place, that even in my short,
+interrupted, and feverish dreams I beheld daggers and
+axes glittering around me; I heard the noise of wheels,
+saw burning piles and heated irons, and woke in convulsive
+terror, only to give myself up to gloomy reflections,
+inspired by the reality of my situation, and the impressions
+left by these nocturnal visions. What tears did I shed
+in those dreary moments! How innumerable were the bitter
+wounds that lacerated my heart! My prayers seemed to me
+unworthy to be received by a God of charity, because,
+notwithstanding all my efforts to banish from my soul
+every feeling of resentment towards my persecutors, hatred
+returned with redoubled power. I often repeated the words
+of Christ, 'Father, forgive them, they know not what they
+do;' but immediately a voice would answer, 'This prayer
+is not intended for the Jesuits; they resemble not the
+crucifiers, who were blind instruments of the rage of
+the Jews; while these men are fully conscious of what
+they are doing; they are the modern Pharisees.' The
+reading of the Bible would have afforded me great
+consolation, but this was denied me." * * *
+
+The fourteenth day of his imprisonment he was taken to
+the council to hear his sentence, when he was again urged
+to sign the form of recantation. But he refused. The
+Father Rossini then spoke: "Yon are decided; let it be,
+then, as you deserve. Rebellious son of the church, in
+the fullness of the power which she has received from
+Christ, you shall feel the holy rigor of her laws. She
+cannot permit tares to grow with the good seed. She cannot
+suffer you to remain among her sons and become the
+stumbling-block for the ruin of many. Abandon, therefore,
+all hope of leaving this place, and of returning to dwell
+among the faithful. KNOW, ALL IS FINISHED FOR YOU!"
+
+For the conclusion of this narrative we refer the reader
+to the volume itself.
+
+If any more evidence were needed to show that the spirit
+of Romanism is the same to-day that it has ever been, we
+find it in the account of a legal prosecution against
+ten Christians at Beldac, in France, for holding and
+attending a public worship not licensed by the civil
+authority. They had made repeated, respectful, and earnest
+applications to the prefect of the department of
+Hante-Vienne for the authorization required by law, and
+which, in their case, ought to have been given. It was
+flatly refused. They persisted in rendering to God that
+worship which his own command and their consciences
+required. For this they were arraigned as above stated,
+on the 10th of August, 1855. On the 26th of January,
+1856, the case was decided by the "tribunal," and the
+three pastors and one lady, a schoolmistress, were
+condemned to pay a fine of one thousand francs each, and
+some of the others five-hundred francs each, the whole
+amount, together with legal expenditures, exceeding the
+sum of nine thousand francs.
+
+Meantime, the converts continue to hold their
+worship-meetings in the woods, barns, and secret places,
+in order not to be surprised by the police commissioner,
+and to avoid new official reports.
+
+"Thus, you see," says V. De Pressense, in a letter to
+the 'American and foreign Christian Union,' "that we are
+brought back to the religious meetings of the desert,
+when the Protestants of the Cevennes evinced such
+persevering fidelity. The only difference is, that these
+Christians belonged only a short time ago to that church
+which is now instigating persecutions against them."
+
+
+DESTRUCTION OF THE INQUISITION IN SPAIN.
+
+In 1809, Col. Lehmanowsky was attached to the part of
+Napoleon's army which was stationed in Madrid. "While
+in that city," said Col. L., "I used to speak freely
+among the people what I thought of the Priests and Jesuits,
+and of the Inquisition. It had been decreed by the Emperor
+Napoleon that the Inquisition and the Monasteries should
+be suppressed, but the decree, he said, like some of the
+laws enacted in this country, was not executed."
+
+Months had passed away, and the prisons of the Inquisition
+had not been opened. One night, about ten or eleven
+o'clock, as he was walking one of the streets of Madrid,
+two armed men sprang upon him from an alley, and made a
+furious attack. He instantly drew his sword, put himself
+in a posture of defence, and while struggling with them,
+he saw at a distance the lights of the patrols,--French
+soldiers mounted, who carried lanterns, and who rode
+through the streets of the city at all hours of the night,
+to preserve order. He called to them in French, and as
+they hastened to his assistance, the assailants took to
+their heels and escaped; not, however, before he saw by
+their dress that they belonged to the guards of the
+Inquisition.
+
+He went immediately to Marshal Soult, then Governor of
+Madrid, told him what had taken place, and reminded him
+of the decree to suppress this institution. Marshal Soult
+told him that he might go and suppress it The Colonel
+said that his regiment (the 9th. of the Polish Lancers,)
+was not sufficient for such a service, but if he would
+give him two additional regiments, the 117th, and another
+which he named, he would undertake the work. The 117th
+regiment was under the command of Col. De Lile, who is
+now, like Col. L., a minister of the gospel, and pastor
+of an evangelical church in Marseilles, France. "The
+troops required were granted, and I proceeded," said Col.
+L., "to the Inquisition which was situated about five
+miles from the city. It was surrounded by a wall of great
+strength, and defended by a company of soldiers. When
+we arrived at the walls, I addressed one of the sentinels,
+and summoned the holy fathers to surrender to the Imperial
+army, and open the gates of the Inquisition. The sentinel
+who was standing on the wall, appeared to enter into
+conversation with some one within, at the close of which
+he presented his musket, and shot one of my men. This
+was the signal of attack, and I ordered my troops to fire
+upon those who appeared on the walls."
+
+It was soon obvious that it was an unequal warfare. The
+soldiers of the holy office were partially protected by
+a breast-work upon the walls which were covered with
+soldiers, while our troops were in the open plain, and
+exposed to a destructive fire. We had no cannon, nor
+could we scale the walls, and the gates successfully
+resisted all attempts at forcing them. I could not retire
+and send for cannon to break through the walls without
+giving them time to lay a train for blowing us up. I saw
+that it was necessary to change the mode of attack, and
+directed some trees to be cut down and trimmed, to be
+used as battering rams. Two of these were taken up by
+detachments of men, as numerous as could work to advantage,
+and brought to bear upon the walls with all the power
+they could exert, while the troops kept up a fire to
+protect them from the fire poured upon them from the
+walls. Presently the walls began to tremble, a breach
+was made, and the Imperial troops rushed into the
+Inquisition. Here we met with an incident, which nothing
+but Jesuitical effrontery is equal to. The Inquisitor
+General, followed by the father confessors in their
+priestly robes, all came out of their rooms, as we were
+making our way into the interior of the Inquisition, and
+with long faces, and arms crossed over their breasts,
+their fingers resting on their shoulders, as though they
+had been deaf to all the noise of the attack and defence,
+and had just learned what was going on, they addressed
+themselves in the language of rebuke to their own soldiers,
+saying, "WHY DO YOU FIGHT OUR FRIENDS, THE FRENCH?"
+
+Their intention, no doubt, was to make us think that this
+defence was wholly unauthorized by them, hoping, if they
+could make us believe that they were friendly, they should
+have a better opportunity, in the confusion of the moment,
+to escape. Their artifice was too shallow, and did not
+succeed. I caused them to be placed under guard, and all
+the soldiers of the Inquisition to be secured as prisoners.
+We then proceeded to examine all the rooms of the stately
+edifice. We passed through room after room; found all
+perfectly in order, richly furnished, with altars and
+crucifixes, and wax candles in abundance, but we could
+discover no evidences of iniquity being practiced there,
+nothing of those peculiar features which we expected to
+find in an Inquisition. We found splendid paintings, and
+a rich and extensive library. Here was beauty and splendor,
+and the most perfect order on which my eyes had ever
+rested. The architecture, the proportions were perfect.
+The ceilings and floors of wood were scoured and highly
+polished. The marble floors were arranged with a strict
+regard to order. There was everything to please the eye
+and gratify a cultivated taste; but where were those
+horrid instruments of torture, of which we had been told,
+and. where those dungeons in which human beings were said
+to be buried alive? We searched in vain. The holy father
+assured us that they had been belied; that we had seen
+all; and I was prepared to give up the search, convinced
+that this Inquisition was different from others of which
+I had heard.
+
+But Col. De Idle was not so ready as myself to give up
+the search, and said to me, "Colonel, you are commander
+to-day, and as you say, so it must be; but if you will
+be advised by me, let this marble floor be examined. Let
+water be brought and poured upon it, and we will watch
+and see if there is any place through which it passes
+more freely than others." I replied to him, "Do as you
+please, Colonel," and ordered water to be brought
+accordingly. The slabs of marble were large and beautifully
+polished. When the water had been poured over the floor,
+much to the dissatisfaction of the inquisitors, a careful
+examination was made of every seam in the floor, to see
+if the water passed through. Presently Col. De Lile
+exclaimed that he had found it. By the side of one of
+these marble slabs the water passed through fast, as
+though there was an opening beneath. All hands were now
+at work for further discovery; the officers with their
+swords and the soldiers with their bayonets, seeking to
+clear out the seam, and pry up the slab; others with the
+butts of their muskets striking the slab with all their
+might to break it, while the priests remonstrated against
+our desecrating their holy and beautiful house. While
+thus engaged, a soldier, who was striking with the butt
+of his musket, struck a spring, and the marble slab flew
+up. Then the faces of the inquisitors grew pale as
+Belshazzar when the hand writing appeared on the wall;
+they trembled all over; beneath the marble slab, now
+partly up, there was a stair-case. I stepped to the altar,
+and took from the candlestick one of the candles four
+feet in length, which was burning that I might explore
+the room below. As I was doing this, I was arrested by
+one of the inquisitors, who laid his hand gently on my
+arm, and with a very demure and holy look said "My son,
+you must not take those lights with your bloody hands
+they are holy." "Well," said I, "I will take a holy thing
+to shed light on iniquity; I will bear the responsibility."
+I took the candle, and proceeded down the stair-case. As
+we reached the foot of the stairs we entered a large room
+which was called the hall of judgment. In the centre of
+it was a large block, and a chain fastened to it. On this
+they were accustomed to place the accused, chained to
+his seat. On one side of the room was an elevated seat
+called the Throne of Judgment. This, the Inquisitor
+General occupied, and on either side were seats less
+elevated, for the holy fathers when engaged in the solemn
+business of the Holy Inquisition.
+
+From this room we proceeded to the right, and obtained
+access to small cells extending the entire length of the
+edifice; and here such sights were presented as we hoped
+never to see again. Three cells were places of solitary
+confinement, where the wretched objects of inquisitorial
+hate were confined year after year, till death released
+them from their sufferings, and their bodies were suffered
+to remain until they were entirely decayed, and the rooms
+had become fit for others to occupy. To prevent this
+being offensive to those who occupied the Inquisition,
+there were flues or tubes extending to the open air,
+sufficiently capacious to carry off the odor. In these
+cells we found the remains of some who had paid the debt
+of nature: some of them had been dead apparently but a
+short time, while of others nothing remained but their
+bones, still chained to the floor of their dungeon.
+
+In others we found living sufferers of both sexes and of
+every age, from three score years and ten down to fourteen
+or fifteen years--all naked as they were born into the
+world! And all in chains! Here were old men and aged
+women, who had been shut up for many years. Here, too,
+were the middle aged, and the young man and the maiden
+of fourteen years old. The soldiers immediately went to
+work to release the captives from their chains, and took
+from their knapsacks their overcoats and other clothing,
+which they gave to cover their nakedness. They were
+exceedingly anxious to bring them out to the light of
+day; but Col. L., aware of the danger, had food given
+them, and then brought them gradually to the light, as
+they were able to bear it.
+
+We then proceeded, said Col. L., to explore another room
+on the left. Here we found the instruments of torture,
+of every kind which the ingenuity of men or devils could
+invent. Col. L., here described four of these horrid
+instruments. The first was a machine by which the victim
+was confined, and then, beginning with the fingers, every
+joint in the hands, arms and body, were broken or drawn
+one after another, until the victim died. The second was
+a box, in which the head and neck of the victim were so
+closely confined by a screw that he could not move in
+any way. Over the box was a vessel, from which one drop
+of water a second, fell upon the head of the victim;
+--every successive drop falling upon precisely the same
+place on the head, suspended the circulation in a few
+moments, and put the sufferer in the most excruciating
+agony. The third was an infernal machine, laid horizontally,
+to which the victim was bound; the machine then being
+placed between two beams, in which were scores of knives
+so fixed that, by turning the machine with a crank, the
+flesh of the sufferer was torn from his limbs, all in
+small pieces. The fourth surpassed the others in fiendish
+ingenuity. Its exterior was a beautiful woman, or large
+doll, richly dressed, with arms extended, ready, to
+embrace its victim. Around her feet a semi-circle was
+drawn. The victim who passed over this fatal mark,
+touched a spring which caused the diabolical engine to
+open; its arms clasped him, and a thousand knives cut
+him into as many pieces in the deadly embrace. Col. L.,
+said that the sight of these engines of infernal cruelty
+kindled the rage of the soldiers to fury. They declared
+that every inquisitor and soldier of the inquisition
+should be put to the torture. Their rage was ungovernable.
+Col. L., did not oppose them. They might have turned
+their arms against him if he had attempted to arrest
+their work. They began with the holy fathers. The first
+they put to death in the machine for breaking joints.
+The torture of the inquisitor put to death by the dropping
+of water on his head was most excruciating. The poor man
+cried out in agony to be taken from the fatal machine.
+The inquisitor general was brought before the infernal
+engine called "The Virgin." He begged to be excused. "No"
+said they, "you have caused others to kiss her, and now
+you must do it." They interlocked their bayonets so as
+to form large forks, and with these pushed him over the
+deadly circle. The beautiful image instantly prepared
+for the embrace, clasped him in its arms, and he was cut
+into innumerable pieces. Col. L. said, he witnessed the
+torture of four of them--his heart sickened at the awful
+scene--and he left the soldiers to wreak their vengeance
+on the last guilty inmate of that prison-house of hell.
+
+In the mean time it was reported through Madrid that the
+prisons of the Inquisition were broken open, and multitudes
+hastened to the fatal spot. And, Oh, what a meeting was
+there! It was like a resurrection! About a hundred who
+had been buried for many years were now restored to life.
+There were fathers who had found their long lost daughters;
+wives were restored to their husbands, sisters to their
+brothers, parents to their children; and there were some
+who could recognize no friend among the multitude. The
+scene was such as no tongue can describe.
+
+When the multitude had retired, Col. L. caused the library,
+paintings, furniture, etc., to be removed, and having
+sent to the city for a wagon load of powder, he deposited
+a large quantity in the vaults beneath the building, and
+placed a slow match in connection with it. All had
+withdrawn to a distance, and in a few moments there was
+a most joyful sight to thousands. The walls and turrets
+of the massive structure rose majestically towards the
+heavens, impelled by the tremendous explosion, and fell
+back to the earth an immense heap of ruins. The Inquisition
+was no more!
+
+Such is the account given by Col. Lehmanowsky of the
+destruction of the inquisition in Spain. Was it then
+finally destroyed, never again to be revived? Listen to
+the testimony of the Rev. Giacinto Achilli, D. D. Surely,
+his statements in this respect can be relied upon, for
+he is himself a convert from Romanism, and was formerly
+the "Head Professor of Theology, and Vicar of the Master
+of the Sacred Apostolic Palace."
+
+He certainly had every opportunity to obtain correct
+information on the subject, and in a book published by
+him in 1851, entitled "Dealings with the Inquisition,"
+we find, (page 71) the following startling announcement.
+"We are now in the middle of the nineteenth century, and
+still the Inquisition is actually and potentially in
+existence. This disgrace to humanity, whose entire
+history is a mass of atrocious crimes, committed by the
+priests of the Church of Rome, in the name of God and of
+His Christ, whose vicar and representative, the pope,
+the head of the Inquisition, declares himself to be,--this
+abominable institution is still in existence in Rome and
+in the Roman States."
+
+Again, (page 89) he says, "And this most infamous
+Inquisition, a hundred times destroyed and as often
+renewed, still exists in Rome as in the barbarous ages;
+the only difference being that the same iniquities are
+at present practiced there with a little more secrecy
+and caution than formerly, and this for the sake of
+prudence, that the Holy See may not be subjected to the
+animadversions of the world at large."
+
+On page 82 of the same work we find the following language.
+"I do not propose to myself to speak of the Inquisition
+of times past, but of what exists in Rome at the present
+moment; I shall therefore assert that the laws of this
+institution being in no respect changed, neither can the
+institution itself be said to have undergone any alteration.
+The present race of priests who are now in power are too
+much afraid of the popular indignation to let loose all
+their inquisitorial fury, which might even occasion a
+revolt if they were not to restrain it; the whole world,
+moreover, would cry out against them, a crusade would be
+raised against the Inquisition, and, for a little temporary
+gratification, much power would be endangered. This is
+the true reason why the severity of its penalties is in
+some degree relaxed at the present time, but they still
+remain unaltered in its code."
+
+Again on page 102, he says, "Are the torments which are
+employed at the present day at the Inquisition all a
+fiction? It requires the impudence of an inquisitor, or
+of the Archbishop of Westminister to deny their existence.
+I have myself heard these evil-minded persons lament and
+complain that their victims were treated with too much
+lenity.
+
+"What is it you desire?" I inquired of the inquisitor of
+Spoleto. "That which St. Thomas Aquinas says," answered
+he; "DEATH TO ALL THE HERETICS."
+
+"Hand over, then, to one of these people, a person,
+however respectable; give him up to one of the inquisitors,
+(he who quoted St. Thomas Aquinas to me was made an
+Archbishop)--give up, I say, the present Archbishop of
+Canterbury, an amiable and pious man, to one of these
+rabid inquisitors; he must either deny his faith or be
+burned alive. Is my statement false? Am I doting? Is not
+this the spirit that invariably actuates the inquisitors?
+and not the inquisitors only, but all those who in any
+way defile themselves with the inquisition, such as
+bishops and their vicars, and all those who defend it,
+as the papists do. There is the renowned Dr. Wiseman,
+the Archbishop of Westminster according to the pope's
+creation, the same who has had the assurance to censure
+me from his pulpit, and to publish an infamous article
+in the Dublin Review, in which he has raked together, as
+on a dunghill, every species of filth from the sons of
+Ignatius Loyola; and there is no lie or calumny that he
+has not made use of against me. Well, then, suppose I
+were to be handed over to the tender mercy of Dr. Wiseman,
+and he had the full power to dispose of me as he chose,
+without fear of losing his character in the eyes of the
+nation to which, by parentage more than by merit, he
+belongs, what do you imagine he would do with me? Should
+I not have to undergo some death more terrible than
+ordinary? Would not a council be held with the reverend
+fathers of the company of Loyola, the same who have
+suggested the abominable calumnies above alluded to, in
+order to invent some refined method of putting me out of
+the world? I feel persuaded that if I were condemned by
+the Inquisition to be burned alive, my calumniator would
+have great pleasure in building my funeral pile, and
+setting fire to it with his own hands; or should
+strangulation be preferred, that he would, with equal
+readiness, arrange the cord around my neck; and all for
+the honor and glory of the Inquisition, of which, according
+to his oath, he is a true and faithful servant."
+
+This, then, according to Dr. Achilli is the spirit of
+Romanism! Can we doubt that it would lead to results as
+frightful as anything described in the foregoing story?
+
+But let us listen to his further remarks on the present
+state of the Inquisition. On page 75 he says, "What,
+then, is the Inquisition of the nineteenth century? The
+same system of intolerance which prevailed in the barbarous
+ages. That which raised the Crusade and roused all Europe
+to arms at the voice of a monk [Footnote: Bernard of
+Chiaravalle.] and of a hermit, [Footnote: Peter the
+Hermit.] That which--in the name of a God of peace,
+manifested on earth by Christ, who, through love for
+sinners, gave himself to be crucified--brought slaughter
+on the Albigenses and the Waldenses; filled France with
+desolation, under Domenico di Guzman; raised in Spain
+the funeral pile and the scaffold, devastating the fair
+kingdoms of Granada and Castile, through the assistance
+of those detestable monks, Raimond de Pennefort, Peter
+Arbues, and Cardinal Forquemorda. That, which, to its
+eternal infamy, registers in the annals of France the
+fatal 24th of August, and the 5th of November in those
+of England."
+
+That same system which at this moment flourishes at Rome,
+which has never yet been either worn out or modified,
+and which at this present time, in the jargon of the
+priests, is called a "the holy, Roman, universal, apostolic
+Inquisition. Holy, as the place where Christ was crucified
+is holy; apostolic, because Judas Iscariot was the first
+inquisitor; Roman and universal, because FROM ROME IT
+EXTENDS OVER ALL THE WORLD. It is denied by some that
+the Inquisition which exists in Rome as its centre, is
+extended throughout the world by means of the missionaries.
+The Roman Inquisition and the Roman Propaganda are in
+close connection with each other. Every bishop who is
+sent in partibus infidelium, is an inquisitor charged to
+discover, through the means of his missionaries, whatever
+is said or done by others in reference to Rome, with the
+obligation to make his report secretly. The Apostolic
+nuncios are all inquisitors, as are also the Apostolic
+vicars. Here, then, we see the Roman Inquisition extending
+to the most remote countries." Again this same writer
+informs us, (page 112,) that "the principal object of
+the Inquisition is to possess themselves, by every means
+in their power, of the secrets of every class of society.
+Consequently its agents (Jesuits and Missionaries,) enter
+the domestic circle, observe every motion, listen to
+every conversation, and would, if possible, become
+acquainted with the most hidden thoughts. It is in fact,
+the police, not only of Rome, but of all Italy; INDEED,
+IT MAY BE SAID OF THE WHOLE WORLD."
+
+The above statements of Dr. Achilli are fully corroborated
+by the Rev. Wm. H. Rule, of London. In a book published
+by him in 1852, entitled "The Brand of Dominic," we find
+the following remarks in relation to the Inquisition of
+the present time. The Roman Inquisition is, therefore,
+acknowledged to have an infinite multitude of affairs
+constantly on hand, which necessitates its assemblage
+thrice every week. Still there are criminals, and criminal
+processes. The body of officials are still maintained on
+established revenues of the holy office. So far from any
+mitigation of severity or judicial improvement in the
+spirit of its administration, the criminal has now no
+choice of an advocate; but one person, and he a servant
+of the Inquisition, performs an idle ceremony, under the
+name of advocacy, for the conviction of all. And let the
+reader mark, that as there are bishops in partibus, so,
+in like manner, there are inquisitors of the same class
+appointed in every country, and chiefly, in Great Britain
+and the colonies, who are sworn to secrecy, and of course
+communicate intelligence to this sacred congregation of
+all that can be conceived capable of comprehension within
+the infinitude of its affairs. We must, therefore, either
+believe that the court of Rome is not in earnest, and
+that this apparatus of universal jurisdiction is but a
+shadow,--an assumption which is contrary to all
+experience,--or we must understand that the spies and
+familiars of the Inquisition are listening at our doors,
+and intruding themselves on our hearths. How they proceed,
+and what their brethren at Rome are doing, events may
+tell; BUT WE MAY BE SURE THEY ARE NOT IDLE.
+
+They were not idle in Rome in 1825, when they rebuilt
+the prisons of the Inquisition. They were not idle in
+1842, when they imprisoned Dr. Achilli for heresy, as he
+assures us; nor was the captain, or some other of the
+subalterns, who, acting in their name, took his watch
+from him as he came out. They were not idle in 1843, when
+they renewed the old edicts against the Jews. And all
+the world knows that the inquisitors on their stations
+throughout the pontifical states, and the inquisitorial
+agents in Italy, Germany, and Eastern Europe, were never
+more active than during the last four years, and even at
+this moment, when every political misdemeanor that is
+deemed offensive to the Pope, is, constructively, a sin
+against the Inquisition, and visited with punishment
+accordingly. A deliberative body, holding formal session
+thrice every week, cannot be idle, and although it may
+please them to deny that Dr. Achilli saw and examined a
+black book, containing the praxis now in use, the criminal
+code of inquisitors in force at this day,--as Archibald
+Bower had an abstract of such a book given him for his
+use about one hundred and thirty years ago,--they cannot
+convince me that I have not seen and handled, and used
+in the preparation of this volume, the compendium of an
+unpublished Roman code of inquisitorial regulations,
+given to the vicars of the inquisitor-general of Modena.
+They may be pleased to say that the mordacchia, or gag,
+of which Dr. Achilli speaks, as mentioned in that BLACK
+BOOK, is no longer used; but that it is mentioned there,
+and might be used again is more than credible to myself,
+after having seen that the "sacred congregation" has
+fixed a rate of fees for the ordering, witnessing, and
+administration of TORTURE. There was indeed, a talk of
+abolishing torture at Rome; but we have reason to believe
+that the congregation will not drop the mordacchia,
+inasmuch, as, instead of notifying any such reformation
+to the courts of Europe, this congregation has kept
+silence. For although a continuation of the bullary has
+just been published at Rome, containing several decrees
+of this congregation, there is not one that announces a
+fulfilment of this illusory promise,--a promise imagined
+by a correspondent to French newspapers, but never given
+by the inquisitors themselves. And as there is no proof
+that they have yet abstained from torture, there is a
+large amount of circumstantial evidence that they have
+delighted themselves in death. And why not? When public
+burnings became inexpedient--as at Goa--did they not make
+provision for private executions?
+
+For a third time at least the Roman prisons--I am not
+speaking of those of the provinces--were broken open, in
+1849, after the desertion of Pius IX., and two prisoners
+were found there, an aged bishop and a nun. Many persons
+in Rome reported the event; but instead of copying what
+is already before the public, I translate a letter
+addressed to me by P. Alessandro Gavazzi, late
+chaplain-general of the Roman army, in reply to a few
+questions which I had put to him. All who have heard his
+statements may judge whether his account of facts be not
+marked with every note of accuracy. They will believe
+that his power of oratory DOES NOT betray him into random
+declamation. Under date of March 20th, 1852, be writes
+thus:
+
+"MY DEAR SIR,--In answering your questions concerning
+the palace of Inquisition at Rome, I should say that I
+can give only a few superficial and imperfect notes. So
+short was the time that it remained open to the public,
+So great the crowd of persons that pressed to catch a
+sight of it, and so intense the horror inspired by that
+accursed place, that I could not obtain a more exact and
+particular impression.
+
+"I found no instruments of torture, [Footnote: "The gag,
+the thumb-screw, and many other instruments of severe
+torture could be easily destroyed and others as easily
+procured. The non-appearance of instruments is not enough
+to sustain the current belief that the use of them is
+discontinued. So long as there is a secret prison, and
+while all the existing standards of inquisitorial practice
+make torture an ordinary expedient for extorting
+information, not even a bull, prohibiting torture, would
+be sufficient to convince the world that it has been
+discontinued. The practice of falsehood is enjoined on
+inquisitors. How, then, could we believe a bull, or
+decree, if it were put forth to-morrow, to release them
+from suspicion, or to screen them from obloquy? It would
+not be entitled to belief."--Rev. Wm. H. Rule.] for they
+were destroyed at the time of the first French invasion,
+and because such instruments were not used afterwards by
+the modern Inquisition. I did, however, find, in one of
+the prisons of the second court, a furnace, and the
+remains of a woman's dress. I shall never be able to
+believe that that furnace was placed there for the use
+of the living, it not being in such a place, or of such
+a kind, as to be of service to them. Everything, on the
+contrary, combines to persuade me that it was made use
+of for horrible deaths, and to consume the remains of
+the victims of inquisitorial executions. Another object
+of horror I found between the great hall of judgment and
+the luxurious apartment of the chief jailer (primo
+custode), the Dominican friar who presides over this
+diabolical establishment. This was a deep trap or shaft
+opening into the vaults under the Inquisition. As soon
+as the so-called criminal had confessed his offence; the
+second keeper, who is always a Dominican friar, sent him
+to the father commissary to receive a relaxation [Footnote:
+"In Spain, RELAXATION is delivery to death. In the
+established style of the Inquisition it has the same
+meaning. But in the common language of Rome it means
+RELEASE. In the lips of the inquisitor, therefore, if he
+used the word, it has one meaning, and another to the
+ear of the prisoner."--Rev. Wm. H. Rule.] of his punishment.
+With the hope of pardon, the confessed culprit would go
+towards the apartment of the holy inquisitor; but in the
+act of setting foot at its entrance, the trap opened,
+and the world of the living heard no more of him. I
+examined some of the earth found in the pit below this
+trap; it was a compost of common earth, rottenness, ashes,
+and human hair, fetid to the smell, and horrible to the
+sight and to the thought of the beholder.
+
+"But where popular fury reached its highest pitch was in
+the vaults of St. Pius V. I am anxious that you should
+note well that this pope was canonized by the Roman church
+especially for his zeal against heretics. I will now
+describe to you the manner how, and the place where,
+those vicars of Jesus Christ handled the living members
+of Jesus Christ, and show you how they proceeded for
+their healing. You descend into the vaults by very narrow
+stairs. A narrow corridor leads you to the several cells,
+which, for smallness and stench, are a hundred times more
+horrible than the dens of lions and tigers in the Colosseum.
+Wandering in this labyrinth of most fearful prisons, that
+may be called 'graves for the living,' I came to a cell
+full of skeletons without skulls, buried in lime, and
+the skulls, detached from the bodies, had been collected
+in a hamper by the first visitors. Whose were those
+skeletons? and why were they buried in that place and in
+that manner? I have heard some popish priests trying to
+defend the Inquisition from the charge of having condemned
+its victims to a secret death, say that the palace of
+the Inquisition was built on a burial-ground, belonging
+anciently to a hospital for pilgrims, and that the
+skeletons found were none other than those of pilgrims
+who had died in that hospital. But everything contradicts
+this papistical defence. Suppose that there had been a
+cemetery there, it could not have had subterranean
+galleries and cells, laid out with so great regularity;
+and even if there had been such--against all probability
+--the remains of bodies would have been removed on laying
+the foundation of the palace, to leave the space free
+for the subterranean part of the Inquisition. Besides,
+it is contrary to the use of common tombs to bury the
+dead by carrying them through a door at the side; for
+the mouth of the sepulchre is always at the top. And
+again, it has never been the custom in Italy to bury the
+dead singly in quick lime; but, in time of plague, the
+dead bodies have been usually laid in a grave until it
+was sufficiently full, and then quick lime has been laid
+over them, to prevent pestilential exhalations, by
+hastening the decomposition of the infected corpses.
+This custom was continued, some years ago, in the cemeteries
+of Naples, and especially in the daily burial of the
+poor. Therefore, the skeletons found in the Inquisition
+of Rome could not belong to persons who had died a natural
+death in a hospital; nor could any one, under such a
+supposition, explain the mystery of all the bodies being
+buried in lime except the head. It remains, then, beyond
+a doubt, that that subterranean vault contained the
+victims of one of the many secret martyrdoms of the
+butcherly tribunal. The following is the most probable
+opinion, if it be not rather the history of a fact:
+
+"The condemned were immersed in a bath of slaked lime,
+gradually filled up to their necks. The lime by little
+and little enclosed the sufferers, or walled them up
+alive. The torment was extreme but slow. As the lime
+rose higher and higher, the respiration became more and
+more painful, because more difficult. So that what with
+the suffocation of the smoke, and the anguish of the
+compressed breathing, they died in a manner most horrible
+and desperate. Some time after their death the heads
+would naturally separate from the bodies, and roll away
+into the hollows made by the shrinking of the lime. Any
+other explanation of the feet that may be attempted will
+be found improbable and unnatural. You may make what use
+you please of these notes of mine, since I can warrant
+their truth. I wish that writers, speaking of this infamous
+tribunal of the Inquisition, would derive their information
+from pure history, unmingled with romance; for so great
+and so many the historical atrocities of the Inquisition,
+that they would more than suffice to arouse the detestation
+of a thousand worlds. I know that the popish
+impostor-priests go about saying that the Inquisition
+was never an ecclesiastical tribunal, but a laic. But
+you will have shown the contrary in your work, and may
+also add, in order quite to unmask these lying preachers,
+that the palace of the Inquisition at Rome is under the
+shadow of the palace of the Vatican; that the keepers
+are to this day, Dominican friars; and that the prefect
+of the Inquisition at Rome is the Pope in person.
+
+"I have the honor to be your affectionate Servant,
+
+"ALESSANDRA GAVAZZI."
+
+
+"The Roman parliament decreed the erection of a pillar
+opposite the palace of the Inquisition, to perpetuate
+the memory of the destruction of that nest of abominations;
+but before that or any other monument could be raised,
+the French army besieged and took the city, restored the
+Pope, and with him the tribunal of the faith. Not only
+was Dr. Achilli thrown into one of its old prisons, on
+the 29th of July 1849, but the violence of the people
+having made the building less adequate to the purpose of
+safe keeping, he was transferred to the castle of St.
+Angelo, which had often been employed for the custody of
+similar delinquents, and there he lay in close confinement
+until the 9th of January, 1850, when the French authorities,
+yielding to influential representations from this country
+assisted him to escape in disguise as a soldier, thus
+removing an occasion of scandal, but carefully leaving
+the authority of the congregation of cardinals undisputed.
+Indeed they first obtained the verbal sanction of the
+commissary, who saw it expedient to let his victim go,
+and hush an outcry.
+
+"Yet some have the hardihood to affirm that there is no
+longer any Inquisition; and as the Inquisitors were
+instructed to suppress the truth, to deny their knowledge
+of cases actually passing through their hands, and to
+fabricate falsehoods for the sake of preserving the
+SECRET, because the secret was absolutely necessary to
+the preservation of their office, so do the Inquisitors
+in partibus falsify and illude without the least scruple
+of conscience, in order to put the people of this country
+off their guard.
+
+"That the Inquisition really exists, is placed beyond a
+doubt by its daily action as a visible institution at
+Rome. But if any one should fancy that it was abolished
+after the release of Dr. Achilli, let him hear a sentence
+contradictory, from a bull of the Pope himself, Pius IX,
+a document that was dated at Rome, August 22, 1851, where
+the pontiff, condemning the works of Professor Nuytz, of
+Turin, says, "after having taken the advice of the doctors
+in theology and canon law, AFTER HAVING COLLECTED THE
+SUFFRAGES OF OUR VENERABLE BROTHERS THE CARDINALS OF THE
+CONGREGATION OF THE SUPREME AND UNIVERSAL INQUISITION."
+And so recently as March, 1852, by letters of the
+Secretariate of State, he appointed four cardinals to be
+"members of the Sacred Congregation of the Holy Roman
+and Universal Inquisition;" giving incontrovertible
+evidence that provision is made for attending to
+communications of Inquisitors in partibus from all parts
+of the world. As the old cardinals die off, their vacant
+seats are filled by others. The 'immortal legion' is
+punctually recruited.
+
+"After all, have we in Great Britain, Ireland and the
+colonies, and our brethren of the foreign mission stations,
+any reason to apprehend harm to, ourselves from the
+Inquisition as it is? In reply to this question, let it be
+observed;
+
+"1. That there are Inquisitors in partibus is not to be
+denied. That letters of these Inquisitors are laid before
+the Roman Inquisition is equally certain. Even in the
+time of Leo XII, when the church of Rome was far less
+active in the British empire than it is now, some particular
+case was always decided on Thursday, when the Pope, in
+his character of universal Inquisitor, presided in the
+congregation. It cannot be thought that now, in the height
+of its exultation, daring and aggression, this congregation
+has fewer emissaries, or that they are less active, or
+less communicative than they were at that time. We also
+see that the number is constantly replenished. The
+cardinals Della Genga-Sermattei; De Azevedo; Fornari;
+and Lucciardi have just been added to it.
+
+"2. Besides a cardinal in England, and a delegate in
+Ireland, there is both in England and Ireland, a body of
+bishops, 'natural Inquisitors,' as they are always
+acknowledged, and have often claimed to be; and these
+natural Inquisitors are all sworn to keep the secret--the
+soul of the Inquisition. Since, then, there are Inquisitors
+in partibus, appointed to supply the lack of an avowed
+and stationary Inquisition, and since the bishops are
+the very persons whom the court of Rome can best command,
+as pledged for such a service, it is reasonable to suppose
+they act in that capacity.
+
+"3. Some of the proceedings of these bishops confirm the
+assurance that there is now an Inquisition in activity
+in England. * * * The vigilance exercised over families,
+also the intermeddling of priests with education, both
+in families and schools, and with the innumerable relations
+of civil society, can only be traced back to the Inquisitors
+in partibus, whose peculiar duty, whether by help of
+confessors or familiars, is to worm out every secret of
+affairs, private or public, and to organize and conduct
+measures of repression or of punishment. Where the secular
+arm cannot be borrowed, and where offenders lie beyond
+the reach of excommunication, irregular methods must be
+resorted to, not rejecting any as too crafty or too
+violent. Discontented mobs, or individual zealots are to
+be found or bought. What part the Inquisitors in partibus
+play in Irish assassinations, or in the general mass of
+murderous assaults that is perpetrated in the lower haunts
+of crime, it is impossible to say. Under cover of
+confessional and Inquisitorial secrets, spreads a broad
+field of action--a region of mystery--only visible to
+the eye of God, and to those 'most reverend and most
+eminent' guardians of the papacy, who sit thrice every
+week, in the Minerva and Vatican, and there manage the
+hidden springs of Inquisition on the heretics, schismatics,
+and rebels, no less than on 'the faithful' of realms.
+Who can calculate the extent of their power over those
+'religious houses,' where so many of the inmates are but
+neophytes, unfitted by British education for the
+intellectual and moral abnegation, the surrender of mind
+and conscience, which monastic discipline exacts? Yet
+they must be coerced into submission, and kept under
+penal discipline. Who can tell how many of their own
+clergy are withdrawn to Rome, and there delated, imprisoned,
+and left to perish, if not 'relaxed' to death, in punishment
+of heretical opinions or liberal practices? We have heard
+of laymen, too, taken to Rome by force, or decoyed thither
+under false pretences there to be punished by the universal
+Inquisition; and whatever of incredibility may appear in
+some tales of Inquisitorial abduction, the general fact
+that such abductions have taken place, seems to be
+incontrovertible. And now that the Inquisitors in partibus
+are distributed over Christendom, and that they provide
+the Roman Inquisition with daily work from year's end to
+year's end, is among the things most certain,--even the
+most careless of Englishmen must acknowledge that we have
+all reason to apprehend much evil from the Inquisition
+as it is. And no Christian can be aware of this fact,
+without feeling himself more than ever bound to uphold
+the cause of christianity, both at home and abroad, as
+the only counteractive of so dire a curse, and the only
+remedy of so vast an evil." Rev. Wm. Rule, London.
+
+The Rev. E. A. Lawrence, writing of "Romanism at Rome,"
+gives us the following vivid description of the present
+state of the Roman Church.
+
+"Next is seen at Rome the PROPAGANDA, the great missionary
+heart of the whole masterly system. Noiselessly, by the
+multiform orders of monks and nuns, as through so many
+veins and arteries, it sends out and receives back its
+vital fluid. In its halls, the whole world is distinctly
+mapped out, and the chief points of influence minutely
+marked. A kind of telegraphic communication is established
+with the remotest stations in South Africa and Siberia,
+and with almost every nook in our own land, to which the
+myrmidons of Papal power look with the most of fear. It
+is through means of this moral galvanic battery, set up
+in the Vatican, that the Church of Rome has gained its
+power of UBIQUITY--has so well nigh made itself OMNIPOTENT,
+as well as omnipresent.
+
+"It is no mean or puny antagonist that strides across
+the path of a free, spiritual and advancing Protestantism.
+And yet, with a simple shepherd's sling, and the smooth
+stones gathered from Siloa's brook, God will give it the
+victory.
+
+"Once more let us look, and we shall find at Rome, still
+working in its dark, malignant efficiency, the INQUISITION.
+Men are still made to pass through fires of this Moloch.
+This is the grand defensive expedient of the Papacy, and
+is the chief tribunal of the States. Its processes are
+all as secret as the grave. Its cells are full of dead
+men's bones. They call it the Asylum for the poor--a
+retreat for doubting and distressed pilgrims, where they
+may have experience of the parental kindness of their
+father the Pope, and their mother the church.
+
+"Dr. Achilli had a trial of this beneficient discipline,
+when thrown into the deep dungeon of St. Angelo. And how
+many other poor victims of this diabolical institution
+are at this moment pining in agony, heaven knows.
+
+"In America, we talk about Rome as having ceased to
+persecute. IT IS A MISTAKE. She holds to the principle
+as tenaciously as ever. She cannot dispense with it. Of
+the evil spirit of Protestantism she says, "This kind
+goeth not out, but by fire." Her reign, is a reign of
+terror. Hence she must hold both the principle and the
+power of persecution, of compelling men to believe, or,
+if they doubt, of putting them to death for their own
+good. Take from her this power and she bites the dust."
+
+
+ROMANISM IN AMERICA.
+
+It may perchance be said that the remarks of the Rev.
+William Rule, quoted above, refer exclusively to the
+existing state of things is England, Ireland, and the
+colonies. But who will dare to say, after a careful
+investigation of the subject, that they do not apply with
+equal force to these United States?
+
+Has America nothing to fear from the inquisitors--from
+the Jesuits? Is it true that the "Inquisition still exists
+in Rome--that its code is unchanged--that its emissaries
+are sent over all the world--that every nuncio and bishop
+is an Inquisitor," and is it improbable that, even now,
+torture rooms like those described in the foregoing story,
+may be found in Roman Catholic establishments in this
+country? Yes, even here, in Protestant, enlightened
+America! Have WE then nothing to fear from Romanism? But
+a few days since a gentleman of learning and intelligence
+when speaking of this subject, exclaimed, "What have we
+to do with the Jesuits? and what is the Inquisition to
+us? The idea that we have aught to fear from Romanism,
+is simply ridiculous!" In reply to this, allow me to
+quote the language of the Rev. Manuel J. Gonsalves,
+leader of the Madeira Exiles.
+
+"The time will come when the American people will arise
+as one man, and not only abolish the confessional, but
+will follow the example of many of the European nations,
+who had no peace, or rest, till they banished the Jesuits.
+These are the men, who bask in the sunbeams of popery,
+to whom the pope has entrusted the vast interests of the
+king of Rome, in this great Republic. Nine tenths of the
+Romish priests, now working hard for their Master the
+pope, in this country, are full blooded Jesuits. The
+man of sin who is the head of the mystery of iniquity
+--through the advice of the popish bishops now in this
+country, has selected the Jesuitical order of priests,
+to carry on his great and gigantic operations in the
+United States of America. Those Jesuits who distinguish
+themselves the most in the destruction of Protestant
+Bible religion, and who gain the largest number of
+protestant scholars for popish schools and seminaries;
+who win most American converts to their sect are offered
+great rewards in the shape of high offices in the church.
+John Hughes, the Jesuit Bishop of the New York Romanists,
+was rewarded by Pope Pius 9th, with an Archbishop's mitre,
+for his great, zeal and success, in removing God's Holy
+Bible from thirty-eight public schools in New York, and
+for procuring a papal school committee, to examine every
+book in the hands of American children in the public
+schools, that every passage of truth, in those books of
+history unpalatable to the pope might be blotted out."
+Has America then nothing to do with Romanism?
+
+But another gentleman exclaims, "What if Romanism be on
+the increase in the United States! Is not their religion
+as dear to them, as ours is to us?" To this the Rev. M.
+J. Gonsalves would reply as follows. "The American people
+have been deceived, in believing THAT POPERY WAS A
+RELIGION, not a very good one to be sure, but some kind
+of one. This has been their great mistake. We might as
+well call the Archbishop of the fallen angels, and his
+crew, a religious body of intelligent beings, because
+they believe in an Almighty God, and tremble, as to call
+the man of sin and his Jesuits, a body of religious
+saints. The tree is known by its fruit, such as 'love,
+joy, peace, long suffering, gentleness, goodness, meekness,
+faith, temperance, brotherly kindness;' and where the
+spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty, Christian liberty,
+giving to God and man their due unasked. Now we ask, what
+kind of fruit does the tree of Popery bear, in any country,
+that it should claim homage, and respect, as a good
+religion?"
+
+Such is the language of one who knew so well what popery
+was, that he fled from it as from a hell upon earth.
+
+In his further remarks upon the horrors of convent life
+in the United States, he fully confirms the statements
+in the foregoing narrative. He says, "It is time that
+American gentlemen, who are so much occupied in business,
+should think of the dangers of the confessional, and the
+miseries endured by innocent, duped, American, imprisoned
+females in this free country; and remember that these
+American ladies who have been duped and enticed by
+Jesuitical intrigue and craft, into their female convents,
+have no means of deliverance; they cannot write a letter
+to a friend without the consent and inspection of the
+Mother Abbess, who is always and invariably a female
+tyrant, a creature in the pay of the Bishop, and dependent
+upon the Bishop for her despotic office of power. The
+poor, unfortunate, imprisoned American female has no
+means of redress in her power. She cannot communicate
+her story of wrong and suffering to any living being
+beyond the walls of her prison. She may have a father,
+a mother, a dear brother, or a sister, who, if they knew
+one-sixteenth part of her wrongs and sufferings, would
+fly at once to see her and sympathize with her in her
+anguish. But the Jesuit confessor attached to the prison
+is ever on the alert. Those ladies who appear the most
+unhappy, and unreconciled to their prison, are compelled
+to attend the confessional every day; and thus the artful
+Jesuit, by a thousand cross questions, is made to understand
+perfectly the state of their minds. The Lady Porter, or
+door-keeper and jailor, is always a creature of the
+priest's, and a great favorite with the Mother Abbess.
+Should any friends call to see an unhappy nun who is
+utterly unreconciled to her fate, the Lady Porter is
+instructed to inform those relatives that the dear nun
+they want to see so much, is so perfectly happy, and
+given up to heavenly meditations, that she cannot be
+persuaded to see an earthly relative. At the same time
+the Mother Abbess dismisses the relatives with a very
+sorrowful countenance, and regrets very much, in appearance,
+their disappointment. But the unhappy nun is never informed
+that her friends or relatives have called to inquire
+after her welfare. How amazing, that government should
+allow such prisons in the name of religion!"
+
+
+CONVENT OF THE. CAPUCHINS IN SANTIAGO
+
+In a late number of "The American and Foreign Christian
+Union," we find the following account of conventual life
+from a report of a Missionary in Chile, South America.
+
+"Now, my brother, let me give you an account related to
+me by a most worthy English family, most of the members
+of which have grown up in the country, confirmed also by
+common report, of the Convent of Capuchins, in Santiago.
+
+"The number of inmates is limited to thirty-two young
+ladies. The admittance fee is $2000. When the nun enters
+she is dressed like a bride, in the most costly material
+that wealth can command. There, beside the altar of
+consecration, she devotes herself in the most solemn,
+manner to a life of celibacy and mortification of the
+flesh and spirit, with the deluded hope that her works
+will merit a brighter mansion in the realms above.
+
+"The forms of consecration being completed, she begins
+to cast off her rich veil, costly vestments, all her
+splendid diamonds and brilliants--which, in many instances,
+have cost, perhaps, from ten to fifteen, or even twenty
+thousand dollars. Then her beautiful locks are submitted
+to the tonsure; and to signify her deadness forever to
+the world, she is clothed in a dress of coarse grey cloth,
+called serge, in which she is to pass the miserable
+remnant of her days. The dark sombre walls of her prison
+she can sever pass, and its iron-bound doors are shut
+forever upon their new, youthful, and sensitive occupant.
+Rarely, if ever, is she permitted to speak, and NEVER,
+NEVER, to see her friends or The loved ones of home--to
+enjoy the embraces of a fond mother, or devoted father,
+or the smiles of fraternal or sisterly affection. If ever
+allowed to speak at all, it is through iron bars where
+she cannot be seen, and in the presence of the abbess,
+to see that no complaint escapes her lips. However much
+her bosom may swell with anxiety at the sound of voices
+which were once music to her soul, and she may long to
+pour out her cries and tears to those who once soothed
+every sorrow of her heart; yet not a murmur must be
+uttered. The soul must suffer its own sorrows solitary
+and alone, with none to sympathize, or grant relief, and
+none to listen to its moans but the cold gloomy walls of
+her tomb. No, no, not even the Gospel of Jesus Christ,
+that great alleviator of all the sorrows of the heart,
+is allowed an entrance there.
+
+"Nor is this all. Besides being condemned to a meagre,
+insufficient and unwholesome diet which they themselves
+most cook, the nuns are not allowed to speak much with
+each other, except to say, 'Que morir tenemos, 'we are
+to die,' or 'we must die,' and to reply, 'Ya los sabemos,'
+'we know it,' or 'already we know it'
+
+"They pass most of their time in small lonely cells,
+where they sleep in a narrow place dug out in the ground,
+in the shape of a coffin, without bed of any kind, except
+a piece of coarse serge spread down; and their daily
+dress is their only covering. SLEEP! Did I say? Alas!
+'Tired nature's sweet restorer, balmy sleep, no more with
+his downy pinions lights on his unsullied with a tear:'
+FOR EVERY HOUR OF THE TWENTY-FOUR they are aroused by
+the bell to perform their 'Ave Maria's,' count their
+rosaries, and such other blind devotions as may be imposed.
+Thus they drag out a miserable existence, and when death
+calls the spirit to its last account, the other nuns dig
+the grave with their own hands, within the walls of the
+convent, and so perform the obsequies of their departed
+sister.
+
+"Thus, I have briefly given you not fiction! but a faithful
+narrative of facts in regard to conventual life, and an
+establishment marked by almost every form of sin, and
+yet making pretence of 'perfecting the saints,' by the
+free and gentle influences of the gospel of Christ.
+
+"Query 1st. What is done with all the money?
+
+"2d. What is done with the rich vestments and jewels?
+
+"3d. Where do the priests get all their brilliants to
+perform high mass and adorn their processions?
+
+"4th. Where does all the hair of the saints come from,
+which is sold in lockets for high prices as sure preventives
+of evil?
+
+"5th. Whose grave has been plundered to obtain RELICS to
+sell to the ignorant.
+
+"6th. Where does the Romish Church obtain her SURPLUS
+RIGHTEOUSNESS TO SELL TO THE needy, and not give it like
+our blessed Lord, 'without money and without price?'
+
+"7th. Who is responsible for the FANATICISM that induces
+a young female to incarcerate herself?
+
+"8th. Where is the authority in reason, in revelation,
+for such a life?
+
+"9th. What is the average length of life?
+
+"10th. How many die insane?
+
+"A young lady lately cast herself from the tower, and
+was dashed in pieces, being led to do it, doubtless, in
+desperation. The convents of this city, of the same order,
+require the same entrance fee, $2000. Of course, none
+but the comparatively rich can avail themselves of this
+perfection of godliness.
+
+"Who will say that this mode of life has not been invented
+in order to cut short life as rapidly as possible, that
+the $2000, with all the rich diamonds upon initiation,
+may be repeated as frequently as possible?
+
+"O! how true it is, that Romanism is the same merciless,
+cruel, diabolical organisation, wherever it can fully
+develop itself, in all lands. How truly is it denominated
+by the pen of inspiration the 'MYSTERY OF INIQUITY,'
+especially that part of it relating to these secret
+institutions, and the whole order of the Jesuits."
+
+The editor of the "Christian Union", in his remarks on
+the above, says, "Already the fair face of our country
+is disfigured by the existence here and there of conventual
+establishments. At present they do not show the hideous
+features which they, at least in some cases, assume in
+countries where papal influence and authority are supreme.
+The genius of our government and institutions necessarily
+exerts a restraining power, which holds them from excesses
+to which, otherwise, they might run. But they constitute
+a part of a system which is strongly at variance with
+the interests of humanity, and merely wait the occurrence
+of favorable circumstances to visit upon our land all
+the horrors which they have inflicted elsewhere.
+
+"How many conventual establishments there are now in the
+nation, few Protestants, it is believed, know. And how
+many young females, guilty of no crime against society,
+and condemned by no law of the land, are shut up in their
+walls and doomed to a life which they did not anticipate
+when entering them, a life which is more dreadful to them
+than death, very few of the millions of our citizens
+conceive. The majority of our people have slept over the
+whole subject, and the indifference thus manifested has
+emboldened the priests to posh forward the extension of
+the system, and the workmen are now busy in various places
+in the construction of additional establishments. But
+such facts as are revealed in this article, from the pen
+of our missionary, in connection with things that are
+occurring around us, show that no time should be lost in
+examining this whole subject of convents and monasteries,
+and in legislating rightly about them."
+
+Again, when speaking of papal convents in the United
+States, the same talented writer observes, "The time has
+fully come when Protestants should lay aside their apathy
+and too long-cherished indifference in respect to the
+movements of Rome in this land. It is time for them to
+call to mind the testimony of their fathers, their bitter
+experiences from the papal See, and to take effective
+measures to protect the inheritance bequeathed to them,
+that they may hand it down to their children free from
+corruption, as pure and as valuable as when they received
+it. They should remember that Rome claims never to
+change, that what she was in Europe when in the zenith
+of her power, she will be here when fairly installed,
+and has ability to enforce her commands.
+
+"Her numbers now on our soil, her nearly two thousand
+priests moving about everywhere, her colleges and
+printing-presses, her schools and convents, and enormous
+amounts of property held by her bishops, have served as
+an occasion to draw out something of her spirit, and to
+show that she is ARROGANT AND ABUSIVE TO THE EXTENT OF
+HER POWER.
+
+"Scarcely a newspaper issues from her press, but is
+loaded with abuse of Protestants and of their religion,
+and at every available point assaults are made upon their
+institutions and laws; and Rome and her institutions and
+interests are crowded into notice, and special privileges
+are loudly clamored for.
+
+"All Protestants, therefore, of every name, and of every
+religious and political creed, we repeat it, who do not
+desire to ignore the past, and to renounce all care or
+concern for the future, as to their children and children's
+children, should lose no time in informing themselves of
+the state of things around them in regard to the papacy
+and its institutions. They should without delay devote
+their efforts and influence to the protection of the
+country against those Popish establishments and their
+usages which have been set up among us without the
+authority of law, and under whose crushing weight some
+of the nations of Europe have staggered and reeled for
+centuries, and have now but little of their former power
+and glory remaining, and under which Mexico, just upon
+our borders, has sunk manifestly beyond the power of
+recovery.
+
+"Let each individual seek to awaken an interest in this
+matter in the mind of his neighbor. And if there be papal
+establishments in the neighborhood under the names of
+'schools,' 'retreats', 'religions communities,' or any
+other designation, which are at variance with, or are
+not conformed to, the laws of the commonwealth in which
+they are situated, let memorials be prepared and signed
+by the citizens, and forwarded immediately to the
+legislature, praying that they may be subjected to
+examination, and required to conform to the laws by which
+all Protestant institutions of a public nature are
+governed.
+
+"Let us exclude from our national territory all
+irresponsible institutions. Let us seek to maintain a
+government of law, and insist upon the equality of all
+classes before it."
+
+In closing these extracts, we beg leave to express
+ourselves in the words of the Rev. Dr. Sunderland, of
+Washington city, in a sermon delivered before the American
+and Foreign Christian Union, at its anniversary in May,
+1856.
+
+"But new it is asked, 'Why all this tirade against Roman
+Catholics?' We repel the implication. It is not against
+the unhappy millions that are ground down under the iron
+heel of that enormous despotism. They are of the common
+humanity, our brethren and kinsmen, according to the
+flesh. They need the same light instruction and salvation
+that we need. Like ourselves they need the one God, the
+one mediator between God and man, the man Christ Jesus;
+and from the heart we love and pity them. We would grant
+them all the privileges which we claim to ourselves. We
+can have no animosity towards them as men and candidates
+with ourselves for the coming judgment. But it is the
+system under which they are born, and live, and die, I
+repeat, which we denounce, and when we shall cease to
+oppose it, then let our right hand forget her cunning,
+and our tongue cleave to the roof of our mouth. What is
+it but a dark and terrible power on earth before which
+so many horrible memories start up? Why, sir, look at
+it! We drag the bones of the grim behemoth out to view,
+for we would not have the world forget his ugliness nor
+the terror he has inspired. 'A tirade against Romanism,'
+is it? O sir, we remember the persecutions of Justinian;
+we remember the days of the Spanish Inquisition; we
+remember the reign of 'the Bloody Mary;' we remember the
+revocation of the Edict of Nantes; we remember St.
+Bartholomew; we remember the murdered Covenanters,
+Huguenots, and Piedmontese; we remember the noble martyrs
+dying for the testimony of the faith along the ancient
+Rhine; we remember the later wrath which pursued the
+islanders of Madeira, till some of them sought refuge
+upon these shores; we remember the Madiai, and we know
+how the beast ever seeks to propagate his power, by force
+where he can, by deception where he must. And when we
+remember these things, we must protest against the further
+vigor and prosperity of this grand Babylon of all. Take
+it, then, tirade and all, for so ye must, ye ministers
+of Rome, sodden with the fumes of that great deep of
+abominations! The voice of the Protestant shall never be
+hushed; the spirit of Reformation shall never sleep. O,
+lands of Farel and of Calvin, of Zwingle and of Luther!
+O countries where the trumpet first sounded, marshalling
+the people to this fearful contest! We have heard the
+blast rolling still louder down the path of three hundred
+years, and in our solid muster-march we come, the children
+of the tenth generation. We come a growing phalanx, not
+with carnal weapons, but with the armor of the gospel,
+and wielding the sword of truth on the right hand and on
+the left, we say that ANTICHRIST MUST FALL. Hear it, ye
+witnesses, and mark the word; by the majesty of the coming
+kingdom of Jesus, and by the eternal purpose of Jehovah,
+THIS ANTICHRIST MUST FALL."
+
+
+
+
+END
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Life in the Grey Nunnery at Montreal
+by Sarah J Richardson
+
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