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diff --git a/37934-0.txt b/37934-0.txt index 589dfd6..4075fc0 100644 --- a/37934-0.txt +++ b/37934-0.txt @@ -1,25 +1,4 @@ - Non fare ad altri.... - - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost -no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it -under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this -eBook or online at http://www.gutenberg.org/license. - -Title: Non fare ad altri... - -Author: Roberto Bracco - -Release Date: November 05, 2011 [EBook #37934] - -Language: Italian - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NON FARE AD ALTRI.... *** - - - +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 37934 *** Produced by Carlo Traverso, Claudio Paganelli, Barbara Magni, and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net. @@ -1299,375 +1278,4 @@ per tutti! Cioè no.... Che diavolo mi fate dire!... _(Sipario.)_ - - - - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NON FARE AD ALTRI.... *** - - - - - A Word from Project Gutenberg - - -We will update this book if we find any errors. - -This book can be found under: http://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/37934 - -Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no one -owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation (and -you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without permission -and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, set forth in the -General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to copying and -distributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works to protect the Project -Gutenberg™ concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered -trademark, and may not be used if you charge for the eBooks, unless you -receive specific permission. If you do not charge anything for copies of -this eBook, complying with the rules is very easy. 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You may copy it, give it away or re-use it -under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this -eBook or online at http://www.gutenberg.org/license. - -Title: Non fare ad altri... - -Author: Roberto Bracco - -Release Date: November 05, 2011 [EBook #37934] - -Language: Italian - -Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NON FARE AD ALTRI.... *** - - - - -Produced by Carlo Traverso, Claudio Paganelli, Barbara Magni, and the -Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net. - -This file was produced from images generously made available by The -Internet Archive. - - ROBERTO BRACCO - - TEATRO - - VOLUME PRIMO - - *NON FARE AD ALTRI...* -- LUI LEI LUI -- - UN'AVVENTURA DI VIAGGIO -- UNA DONNA -- - LE DISILLUSE -- DOPO IL VEGLIONE - - 2 EDIZIONE. - - - - REMO SANDRON -- Editore - - Libraio della Real Casa - MILANO-PALERMO-NAPOLI - - PROPRIET LETTERARIA - - _I diritti di riproduzione e di traduzione sono riservati per - tutti i paesi, non escluso il Regno di Svezia e quello di - Norvegia._ - - assolutamente proibito di rappresentare questi lavori senza il - consenso scritto dell'Autore _(Art. 14 del Testo Unico 17 - Settembre 1882)_. - - Published in Palermo, 10th. June Privilege of Copyright in the - United States reserved under the Act approved March 3rd. 1905, - by Roberto Bracco and Remo Sandron. - - Off. Tip. Sandron -- 126 -- I -- 290312. - - - - - _NOTA DELL'EDITORE._ - - - _(Dalla edizione precedente)_ - - -_Compilando -- con un necessario ritardo -- il primo volume del Teatro -di_ Roberto Bracco, _ho voluto raccogliere, oltre le sue prime commedie -in un atto e il dramma_ Una donna, _anche qualche curioso saggio della -sua pi spicciola e pi leggera produzione scenica che andava fino alla -fiaba con couplets alla francese e fino allo scherzo comico per -caf-chantant. Mi parso opportuno dare a questo primo volume la -impronta fedele di quella variet saltuaria con cui Roberto Bracco, tra -una corrispondenza amena destinata al_ Capitan Fracassa _e una -canzoncina destinata alla festa di Piedigrotta, tra una novelletta e un -articolo critico, inavvedutamente, cominciava ad esercitare le sue -facolt di commediografo. Erano prove involontarie, pigre e rade, non -determinate che da circostanze occasionali._ - -_Alla ribalta esord, infatti, scrivendo la breve commedia buffa_ Non -fare ad altri... _per soddisfare la insistente richiesta di Ermete -Novelli, gi in rinomanza di attor comico. Aveva pubblicate, dopo il -volume delle_ Frottole di baby, _alcune novelle dialogate, chiamandole -novelle in un atto e ne dovette rifare due per la scena:_ Lui Lei -Lui _e_ Un'avventura di viaggio, _perch Arturo Garzes volle -rappresentare la prima, Pia Marchi la seconda. E i quattro atti di_ Una -donna _sarebbero rimasti -- com' noto -- seppelliti nella sua -scrivania, se un suo amico intimo, Valentino Gervasi, non li avesse -rivelati alla gentile precocit artistica di Tina di Lorenzo, appena -diciottenne. I fogli del manoscritto uscirono quasi ingialliti dal -nascondiglio dove avevano dormito per quattro o cinque anni. L'autore li -rinverd mutando qualche cosa, e li consegn al suggeritore._ - -_Queste poche notizie, e qualche altra che i lettori troveranno pi -avanti, mi sono sembrate necessarie a completare la fisonomia di questo -primo volume del Teatro di_ Roberto Bracco. - -_Intanto, mi compiaccio di annunziare la ristampa dei volumi gi -pubblicati: anche di quelli che sono ora alla seconda edizione. Sar una -ristampa che l'Autore curer personalmente, sicch alcune inesattezze -del testo spariranno. Di qualche lavoro, come per esempio, del dramma_ -Maternit, _qualche pagina sar addirittura mutata, perch il testo -delle precedenti edizioni non sempre identico a quello che l'Autore -preferisce per le rappresentazioni._ - - Maggio, 1909. - - REMO SANDRON. - - ---- - - - - - NON FARE AD ALTRI.... - - _Commedia in un atto_ - -rappresentata per la prima volta al _Sannazaro_ di _Napoli_ da _Ermete -Novelli_, la sera del _22 dicembre 1886_. - - - - - PERSONAGGI: - - _Il Commissario di polizia._ - _Il Brigadiere Malomone._ - _La guardia Fasanisi._ - _Oscar Gentiletti._ - _La signora Betta._ - - La scena in una piccola citt di provincia. - -N. B. Quando questa farsa fu scritta, il _Commissario di Polizia_ si -chiamava _Ispettore_. Ma nel testo della farsa qui riprodotto, essendo -quello ancora talvolta recitato da qualche attor comico, adottato -l'attuale titolo di _Commissario_. - - - - - ATTO UNICO. - - -_Il gabinetto del_ _Commissario di Polizia_: -- _scrivania, scaffali, -seggiole_, ecc. - - - - SCENA I. - - - IL COMMISSARIO, IL BRIGADIERE, LA GUARDIA. - - -_(Il Commissario seduto presso la sua scrivania con aria grave e -autorevole. Ritti, innanzi a lui, stanno il brigadiere Malomone, che -molto grasso, fornito di foltissimi mustacchi, di foltissime -sopracciglie, di occhi truci, e la guardia Fasanisi, che un omino -magro, sottilissimo.)_ - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(ai due)_ Continuate, dunque, continuate. - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Erano circa le undici, quando io attraversavo per caso quella via... - - _Il Commissario_ - -Questo particolare me lo avete gi favorito parecchie volte. - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -E mi trovavo a una quarantina di passi dal luogo del disastro. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Quale disastro? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -La caduta dell'uomo dall'alto del muricciolo. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Voi accorreste al tonfo... - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Al tonfo?... _(Riflette)_ Al tonfo?... Non lo so. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Ma che cosa non sapete? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(con stupida importanza)_ Non so se fu proprio un... tonfo. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Non sentiste cadere l'uomo? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Feci di pi, signor Commissario: sentii e vidi: ma, quanto al tonfo, in -coscienza, non posso dire nulla di esatto. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Bestia! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Proprio cos. Siete una bestia!... dissi io alla guardia Fasanisi, -perch non s'era trovata puntualmente un poco prima al posto dove l'uomo -doveva cadere. Un buon piantone certe cose le prevede; e Fasanisi, ieri -sera, era precisamente lui di piantone alla strada che rasenta il -giardino appartenente alla Signoria Vostra. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Ed egli accorse con voi, che..., come mi avete fatto sapere, -attraversavate... - - _Il Brigadiere_ _e_ _Il Commissario_ - -_(insieme)_... per caso quella via. - - _La Guardia_ - -Io accorsi prima di lui. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Andate avanti, Malomone! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -S, signor Commissario: avanti, sempre! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Che pensaste quando vedeste quell'uomo precipitato gi dal muro che -separa la strada dal giardino di casa mia? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Io subito pensai: quest'uomo... un uomo precipitato gi dal muro che -separa la strada dal giardino del signor Commissario di polizia. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Evidentemente, egli, dal giardino, voleva uscire di nascosto... - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Ed io, senza perdere tempo, gli domandai: perch volevate uscire di -nascosto dal giardino del signor Commissario di polizia? - - _Il Commissario_ - -L'uomo s'imbarazz? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(riflette)_ Non lo so... perch era ancora disteso a terra. - - _Il Commissario_ - -E che rispose? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Rispose: _(riflette)_ Ho un fianco rotto. Allora io gli dissi: voi -siete un ladro. Allora egli mi disse: s, sono un ladro. Allora io -gli dissi: voi siete in arresto. Allora egli mi disse: s, sono in -arresto. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Non oppose resistenza? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Signor Commissario, si lasci arrestare come un galantuomo. Io e -Fasanisi, gentilmente, lo afferrammo per il collo e lo andammo a -depositare in prigione. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Cammin facendo, che aspetto ebbe? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(riflette)_ Signor Commissario, nessun aspetto! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Dio buono, voglio dire: che contegno serb? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Ah! il contegno non lo so. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(canzonando)_ Perch forse era ancora disteso a terra? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -No. Cammin facendo, non era pi disteso a terra. Era... - - _Il Commissario_ - -In piedi? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Nemmeno. Era... zoppicante. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(alla guardia)_ E voi, Fasanisi, avete altro da aggiungere? - - _La Guardia_ - -S, signor Commissario. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Aggiungete! - - _La Guardia_ - -_(a voce alta)_ Io accorsi prima di lui. - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Non vero! - - _La Guardia_ - -_(alzando viepi la voce)_ Io accorsi prima di lui... - - _Il Commissario_ - -Basta cos, Fasanisi! Il brigadiere ha ragione, perch vostro -superiore. E questo tutto ci che avevate da aggiungere? - - _La Guardia_ - -Questo. _(Continua a dire per conto suo, borbottando:)_ Io accorsi prima -di lui... Io accorsi prima di lui... - - _Il Commissario_ - -Ora necessario _(scrivendo in fretta un biglietto)_ ch'io sappia che -cosa riuscito a rubarmi quel farabutto. Fasanisi, questo biglietto a -casa mia. _(Glielo consegna.)_ Subito! - - _La Guardia_ - -_(va via borbottando ancora:)_ Io accorsi prima di lui... - - _Il Commissario_ - -Eh, perbacco! Un ladro che va a rubare in casa del Commissario di -polizia deve essere un bel cretino! Che ne dite, Malomone? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Ecco, signor Commissario. Una volta mi avvenne un fatto simile. Un -mariuolo, senza curarsi ch'io ero un brigadiere di polizia, mi rub il -fazzoletto dalla saccoccia. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Oh! imbecille! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Chi? - - _Il Commissario_ - -Voi! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(piantandosi da bravo militare)_ Precisamente! L'imbecille sempre il -derubato! - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(seccato)_ Malomone, introducete l'arrestato. _(Il brigadiere esce.)_ E -adesso facciamo la conoscenza di quest'altro bell'arnese! _(Pensando e -ricordandosi)_ Sicuro! Alle undici pomeridiane, io entro in casa... -evidente: il ladro teme di essere sorpreso, si d alla fuga, e -patapuffete! gi dal muricciolo. Si lascia arrestare perch... ha un -fianco rotto, e, cammin facendo, serba, come assicura Malomone, un -contegno... zoppicante. Tutto mi completamente chiaro, e con me non -c' troppo da scherzare... - - - - SCENA II. - - - IL COMMISSARIO, IL BRIGADIERE _e_ OSCAR. - - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(entra, tirando pel braccio Oscar Gentiletti, che un bel giovine -sulla trentina, elegantemente vestito.)_ Ecco il malfattore! - - _Oscar_ - -Eh! non c' bisogno di trascinarmi cos... - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(a Oscar, in tono burbero e dignitoso)_ Avanzatevi! - - _Oscar_ - -_(lievemente zoppicando, si avanza e s'inchina cortesemente)_ Servo suo, -cavaliere. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(con orgogliosa compiacenza)_ Ma come fate a sapere che sono cavaliere? - - _Oscar_ - -Le si legge in fronte. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Grazie! _(Dopo averlo guardato attentamente da capo a piedi, chiama a s -il brigadiere:)_ Malomone, venite qua. _(Il brigadiere gli si accosta.)_ -Sentite, _(Sottovoce, all'orecchio)_ Siete certo d'avermi introdotto -l'individuo che arrestaste iersera? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Vostra Signoria mi crederebbe capace d'introdurle un individuo per un -altro? - - _Il Commissario_ - -No, ma gli che quegli abiti... quel volto... quel... quel... - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Gli si vede subito il delinquente, signor Commissario. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Credete che gli si veda subito? Quand' cos, _(disponendosi a -scrivere)_ procediamo all'interrogatorio. _(A Oscar, bruscamente)_ Ehi! -dico, il vostro nome? - - _Oscar_ - -Oscar Gentiletti. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Et? - - _Oscar_ - -Trent'anni. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(piano, al brigadiere)_ Malomone, trent'anni! Non li dimostra. - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(con profonda convinzione e sicurezza)_ Ma li ha! - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(a Oscar)_ Domicilio? - - _Oscar_ - -Strada San Petronio, numero sette, primo piano, porta a destra. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Professione? - - _Oscar_ - -_(subitamente)_ Ladro. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(annotando, tra s)_ Evviva la franchezza! _(Con disgusto)_ Sicch, voi -avete dedicata la vostra vita...? - - _Oscar_ - -A rubare. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(violentemente)_ Vergogna! - - _Oscar_ - -_(con delicatezza insinuante)_ Scusi, cavaliere, abbia la cortesia di -astenersi da qualunque commento o rimbrotto. Veda, questione di -vocazione: lei fa il Commissario di polizia, io faccio il ladro. E in -questo momento, ne sono tanto pi lieto, inquantoch, essendo ladro, io -ho il piacere di poterle dedicare la mia servit. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(imbarazzandosi)_ Oh!... troppo buono... Accomodatevi... si accomodi... -prego... segga... deponga... il cappello. - - _Oscar_ - -_(sedendo e posando il cappello)_ Per accontentarla... - - _Il Commissario_ - -Dunque..., signor ladro..., voi confessate... lei confessa che ieri sera -s'intromise nel giardino di casa mia per... - - _Oscar_ - -_(premuroso)_ Per commettere un furto. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Ma... - - _Oscar_ - -_(con risentimento)_ Metterebbe ella in dubbio la mia parola? - - _Il Commissario_ - -Oh no!, tutt'altro! Le pare! Ma..., ed ecco ci che stavo per dire,... -come va, egregio signor ladro, come va che le salt il ticchio di -commettere un furto proprio in mia casa, -- in casa del Commissario di -polizia? - - _Oscar_ - -Le dir... I pubblici funzionarii sono la mia specialit. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Ah! me ne compiaccio. E..., perdoni, veh, se l'importuno con tante -domande, ma, sa, se io non domandassi, lei non mi risponderebbe... -Dunque, dicevo: come fece per intromettersi nel giardino? - - _Oscar_ - -In un modo semplicissimo: sfuggendo alla vigilanza d'una guardia... che -dormiva, e scavalcando il muro dove questo molto basso. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(al brigadiere)_ Malomone, sentite, eh? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Sento, signor Commissario. - - _Il Commissario_ - -La guardia dormiva. - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Signor Commissario, quella guardia che dormiva era la guardia Fasanisi. -Potevano essere circa le undici quando io attraversavo.... - - _Il Commissario e Il Brigadiere_ - -_(insieme)_... per caso quella via. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Lo so. Tacete, ora. _(A Oscar)_ E... se non sono troppo indiscreto..., -dica: perch, poi, nella fuga, ella and a scavalcare il muro dove esso - pi alto? - - _Oscar_ - -Capir: non avevo mica l'intenzione di capitombolare, io. Ma gli che -non ero pratico del giardino. Era quella la prima volta che ci mettevo -il piede, e, nel buio, correndo, sbagliai la strada. -_(Involontariamente)_ Un'altra volta, star pi attento... Pardon... -dico per dire.... - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(alzandosi e avvicinandosi a Oscar)_ E se dice per fare, s'inganna a -partito, perch, sa, con tutto il rispetto dovuto a un ladro per bene -come lei, la giustizia provveder. - - _Oscar_ - -Torniamo a bomba, cavaliere. Su questo, siamo d'accordo. Io m'intromisi -nel suo giardino per commettere un furto. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Benone! _(Con furberia ed intimit, sedendogli accanto)_ Dal giardino, -ella pass nel salottino di casa mia.... - - _Oscar_ - -Appunto: in quel grazioso salottino turco... con quei ventaglioni... -quei tappeti... quelle anfore... quel microscopico scrignetto di -madreperla.... - - _Il Commissario_ - -S, lo scrignetto carino. L'ho comperato all'Esposizione di Parigi, e -ci tengo! - - _Oscar_ - -Ha ragione!... E quei _biscuits_ civettuoli!... E quei gingilli!... Oh! -un salottino delizioso! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Pih! non c' malaccio; ma, per ora, sa, abbozzato. Bisogna che io -faccia ancora delle spese.... E se lei mi onorer... _(correggendosi e -impacciandosi)_ Cio... no: se lei... mi ruber... cio.... - - _Oscar_ - -_(vivamente)_ Io ho gi rubato, cavaliere! Ho gi rubato! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Dunque, reo confesso? - - _Oscar_ - -N pi, n meno. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(dopo aver ammiccato al brigadiere)_ Tanto meglio! Ci dica, ora, che -cosa ha rubato. I danari contenuti nello scrigno? - - _Oscar_ - -No! - - _Il Commissario_ - -I ninnoli d'argento? - - _Oscar_ - -No! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Gli oggetti d'avorio? - - _Oscar_ - -No! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Il tamtam giapponese? - - _Oscar_ - -No! - - _Il Commissario_ - -I ventagli? le anfore? i tappeti? le seggiole? i muri? - - _Oscar_ - -No! No! - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(infuriato)_ Ma allora che diavolo ha rubato, lei? - - _Oscar_ - -Gi! Che diavolo ho rubato, io? - - _Il Commissario_ - -Probabilmente, ella tent di rubare, ma non potette consumare il furto. - - _Oscar_ - -Che ho da dirle...? - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(in tono confidenziale)_ E sa lei perch non riesc a consumarlo? - - _Oscar_ - -No.... - - _Il Commissario_ - -Lei non riesc a consumarlo, perch verso le undici.... - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -... io attraversavo per caso quella via.... - - _Il Commissario_ - -Zitto, Malomone! Non questa la ragione. _(A Oscar)_ Lei non riesc a -consumare il furto perch verso le undici sent un rumore. - - _Oscar_ - -_(di scatto)_ Verissimo! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Ebbene, _(con alterigia)_ quel rumore... ero io! - - _Oscar_ - -Ahim, cavaliere, le giuro sul mio onore che ella giunse a tempo! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Sicch, lei ritira la confessione? - - _Oscar_ - -La ritiro! - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(tutto tronfio, ritornando alla scrivania)_ E adesso, Malomone, -facciamo il nostro dovere e procediamo alla regolare perquisizione -dell'arrestato. - - _Oscar_ - -Ma sono gi stato perquisito ieri sera. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Malomone, trovaste armi bianche? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -No, signor Commissario. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Armi da fuoco? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Da fuoco, soltanto una scatola di fiammiferi. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Frugaste nelle saccocce? Sequestraste oggetti, carte, grimaldelli? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Non sequestrai, signor Commissario, perch non frugai. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Cosicch, necessaria una seconda e minuta perquisizione. - - _Il Brigadiere_ - - _(s'avvicina a Oscar.)_ - - _Oscar_ - -_(in orgasmo)_ Le assicuro, cavaliere, che se avessi qualche cosa da -esibire alla giustizia, mi farei un pregio di offrirla a lei. Ma -inutile fare una perquisizione quando non c' nulla da trovare... - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(con sussiego)_ Le perquisizioni si fanno quasi sempre allo scopo di -non trovare niente! Malomone, perquisite. - - _Il Brigadiere_ - - _(mette le mani addosso a Oscar.)_ - - _Oscar_ - -_(ribellandosi)_ Ah! questo poi no! _(cerca di svincolarsi.)_ - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(con austerit e calore)_ Signor ladro, lasciate che l'autorit -competente eserciti pienamente il suo potere sulla vostra persona! - - _Oscar_ - -_(convellendosi)_ Ma mi fa il solletico! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(cacciandogli le mani nelle saccocce e palpandolo dappertutto)_ Taci, -furfante! - - _Oscar_ - -Ah ah ah... mi fa il solletico.... - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(cavando fuori gli oggetti a uno a uno)_ Signor Commissario, un -orologio _(con solennit)_ remontoir. Catena... idem! La scatola di -fiammiferi... suddetta! Un portasigari... senza sigari! Un fazzoletto -_(annusandolo)_ profumato, molto profumato... _(Porge tutto al -Commissario.)_ - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(annusando anche lui il fazzoletto)_ Opoponax! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(spalancando gli occhi come per una allarmante scoperta)_ Perdio! -_(Indi, continua a frugare.)_ - - _Oscar_ - -Basta, ora! Basta! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Taci, furfante! _(palpa ancora)_... E questo un portafogli... gravido -anzi che no! _(Lo consegna al Commissario.)_ - - _Oscar_ - -_(pallidissimo)_ fatta! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Non c' altro? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Non c' altro. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(con grande gravit)_ Esaminiamo i reperti. _(Osserva l'orologio, la -catena, la scatola, il fazzoletto, il portasigari, e borbotta:)_ -Orologio remontoir, -- catena... idem, -- eccetera... eccetera... -_(Quindi, apre il portafogli e ne guarda il contenuto, mentre Oscar, -affisandolo, allibisce e, senza fiatare, aspetta. -- A un tratto, il -Commissario, cavando una fotografia da una busta, spalanca gli occhi, e, -con un gesto di raccapriccio, esclama tra s:)_ Il ritratto di mia -moglie! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(notando l'emozione)_ Il signor Commissario ha forse trovato...? - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(furibondo)_ Un corno! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Del signor Commissario? - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(padroneggiandosi)_ Ritiratevi, voi! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(andandosene)_ Sar un oggetto di grande valore. _(via)_. - - - - SCENA III. - - - IL COMMISSARIO _e_ OSCAR. - - - _Oscar_ - - _(resta immobile, con gli sguardi fissi a terra.)_ - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(abbandona la testa fra le mani, e, dopo una lunga pausa, si risolve, -dignitosamente e autorevolmente, a parlare.)_ Questo, o signore, il -ritratto di mia moglie. - - _Oscar_ - -No! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Come no? Non mi verrete voi a insegnare la faccia di mia moglie! - - _Oscar_ - -Ebbene, ne convengo: questo ... presso a poco... il ritratto di sua -moglie. Ma... l'ho rubato. Glie l'avevo detto io. Cavaliere, la prego di -credere che io sono un ladro. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Oh! finiamola! C' la dedica che vi smentisce. _(legge:)_ Al mio Oscar --- Betta. E poi, pi sotto: Ore dieci e mezzo, 25 ottobre 1883: la -data di ieri. _(Continuando a leggere:)_ Prologo del nostro amore. -- -Orrore!... _(si mette le mani nei capelli.)_ - - _Oscar_ - -Via, cavaliere, non si disperi cos! Che cos', poi, un prologhetto?! - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(con solennit)_ Come vedete, o signore, voi non siete pi un ladro; -_(con disprezzo)_ voi siete semplicemente un uomo come un altro! - - _Oscar_ - -_(desolato)_ Sventurato me! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Ed io non sono pi il Commissario di polizia: no! _(Con pari disprezzo)_ -io sono un marito... come tanti altri! _(Pausa.)_ Prendete i vostri -oggetti, signore. _(Glieli rende.)_ Questo ritratto mi baster per fare -arrossire quella donna! _(Lo rimette nella busta, e lo caccia in una -tasca interna del soprabito.)_ Sar inesorabile! - - _Oscar_ - -Cavaliere, lei mi testimonio che io ho fatto tutto il possibile per -salvarla. Le raccomando: glielo dica; mi giustifichi lei; non mi faccia -fare una cattiva figura! - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(con gentilezza)_ Oh! non dubiti! Lei si regolato benissimo: da -perfetto gentiluomo. - - _Oscar_ - -Grazie, cavaliere! - - - - SCENA IV. - - - IL COMMISSARIO, OSCAR, BETTA _e_ LA GUARDIA. - - - _La Guardia_ - -_(di dentro)_ permesso? - - _Il Commissario_ - -Entrate. - - _La Guardia_ - -_(fermandosi sulla soglia)_ Signor Commissario, ho consegnato il -biglietto alla sua signora. Ella qui! - - _Oscar_ - -Lei! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Giunge a proposito. Dite che favorisca. - - _La Guardia_ - - _(va via.)_ - - _Betta_ - -_(entra disinvolta)_ Son venuta io stessa a... _(Sorpresa e sconcertata, -tra s)_ Oscar!... _(Al commissario, sforzandosi di nascondere -l'impressione ricevuta)_ Son venuta io stessa a.... - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(trattenendo l'ira)_ A darmi i chiarimenti che desidero. - - _Betta_ - -Si tratterebbe d'un furto commesso in casa nostra. Mi pare che m'hai -scritto cos. Ma come? Ma quando? Non capisco. In casa ho rovistato -dappertutto, e non manca assolutamente nulla. - - _Il Commissario_ - -Ah s? Assolutamente nulla? Il caso davvero singolare. Un ladro , -senza dubbio, penetrato in casa nostra poco prima delle dieci e mezzo di -iersera; e quindi, dandosi alla fuga, cascato dal muro del giardino e -s' fracassato.... - - _Betta_ - -_(ansiosa)_ S' fracassato?... - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(sogghignando)_ Quasi niente; ma, in compenso, stato arrestato! - - _Betta_ - -_(parlando a stento)_ Ma era, poi, certamente un ladro? - - _Il Commissario_ - -Non vero, Oscar Gentiletti? Avete voi confessato d'essere un ladro? - - _Oscar_ - -_(balbettando)_ S, cavaliere.... - - _Betta_ - - _(ha un sorriso di gratitudine.)_ - - _Il Commissario_ - -E, intanto, in casa nostra, non manca assolutamente nulla! Anzi, forse, -chi sa, a cercar bene,... ci si troverebbe qualche cosa di pi! - - _Betta_ - - strano! - - _Il Commissario_ - - stranissimo! Ma udite, udite, moglie mia, quest'altro particolare -anche pi strano. Io ho fatto perquisire il ladro.... Ebbene, gli -stato trovato indosso... _(ringhiando)_ il vostro ritratto! _(in fretta, -cava di tasca una fotografia e gliela getta innanzi.)_ - - _Betta_ - -_(raccogliendo il ritratto e animandosi d'un subito)_ Il ritratto della -nostra serva!!? - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(in un sussulto di rabbia e mortificazione, tra s)_ Maledetto!... mi -sono sbagliato!... - - _Betta_ - -_(riacquistando coraggio)_ E c' perfino una dedica, e che dedica! -firmata Teresina, e dice: _(legge:)_ Al mio _amatisime Cuc_. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(fingendo meraviglia)_ _Cuc_!? - - _Betta_ - -_Cuc_! - - _Oscar_ - -_Cuc_!! - - _Betta_ - -Ah! ora comprendo!... _(Con malizia)_ Il signore... come si chiama?... -insomma il signor _Cuc_... un ladro di cuori. Ma discreto. Si -contenta di rubare quello delle serve. - - _Oscar_ - -_(tra s, rallegrandosi)_ Magnifico! - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(a Betta, fremendo)_ Smettete, signora moglie! Il ritratto trovato -indosso a lui un altro... _(Lo cerca nelle tasche.)_ - - _Betta_ - -_(seria)_ Prego, signor marito. Se possedeste il ritratto della nostra -serva senza averlo trovato indosso all'amante di lei, l'_amatisime Cuc_ -non sarebbe pi lui _(indicando Oscar)_, ma, caro Commissario, sareste -voi! A conti fatti, non vi resta che mettere in libert l'amante. Quanto -a me, provveder a mettere in libert... la serva! - - - - SCENA V. - - - IL COMMISSARIO, OSCAR, BETTA, IL BRIGADIERE, _poi_ LA GUARDIA. - - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(mordendosi le labbra, suona il campanello. Il brigadiere compare)_ -Malomone, liberate il signore! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Il ladro? - - _Il Commissario_ - -Ma che ladro!... Purtroppo, egli innocente! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(avvicinandosi a Oscar e stringendogli la mano)_ Le mie -congratulazioni! - - _Oscar_ - -_(piano a Malomone)_ S, s, ma sarebbe meglio che pensaste ai casi -vostri quando alle undici della sera state in colloquio amoroso... con -qualche Teresina... presso il giardino del Commissario! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(a bassa voce, in preda a una forte commozione)_ Avete detto al signor -Commissario d'avermici visto?! - - _Oscar_ - -Naturalmente. _(Tra s)_ Ora li servo io tutti e due! _(A Malomone)_ -Egli aspetta che vi discolpiate. - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(con una risoluzione coraggiosa si rivolge al Commissario, gridando.)_ -Signor Commissario!... - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(che era assorto, salta dalla sedia.)_ Cos'?! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Erano circa le undici quando io... non attraversavo per caso quella via. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(infastidito)_ Non me ne importa niente! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Io debbo discolparmi, signor Commissario! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Auff! Discolpatevi, ma... velocemente. - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Noi due ci parlavamo, vero; ma essa era dentro, ed io ero fuori! - - _Il Commissario_ - -Essa, chi? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -Teresina. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(trasalendo)_ Teresina!? - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(piantandosi militarmente e portando la mano alla visiera, come se -urgesse il saluto militare.)_ Signor commissario..., la natura che lo -vuole! Io sono giovane... ella giovane... siamo giovani tutti e due... -Ci vedemmo, ci piacemmo, ci guardammo, ci parlammo, ci amammo. - - _Betta_ - -Oh! questa carina! Il brigadiere il rivale di _Cuc_. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(scoppiando)_ Ed cos, Malomone, che la sera vegliate alla sicurezza -della citt? Voi mentite al Commissario di polizia, voi testimoniate il -falso, voi disonorate la divisa di brigadiere! La vostra condotta, -Malomone, scandalosa. _(Suona il campanello. Si avanza la guardia -Fasanisi.)_ Fasanisi, mettete agli arresti il brigadiere Malomone. - - _La Guardia_ - -Insieme col ladro? - - _Il Commissario_ - -No! del ladro non so che farmene! - - _La Guardia_ - -_(a Malomone)_ Brigadiere Malomone, in nome della legge io vi arresto! - - _Il Brigadiere_ - -_(consegnandogli tragicamente la daga)_ Teresina, tutto per te! _(A un -cenno di Fasanisi, va via a passi gravi, col capo chino e le braccia -piegate.)_ - - _La Guardia_ - -_(seguendolo maestosamente)_ Io accorsi prima di lui.... - - _Oscar_ - -_(tutto cerimonioso, va a stringere la mano al Commissario)_ Cavaliere, -scusi l'incomodo.... - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(inconsciamente cerimonioso anche lui, l'accompagna sino alla porta)_ -Oh! si figuri.... - - _Oscar_ - -Fortunatissimo d'averla conosciuta.... - - _Il Commissario_ - -La fortuna tutta mia.... Si conservi... - - _Oscar_ - -A rivederla. - - _Il Commissario_ - -A rivederla. - - _Oscar_ - - _(esce.)_ - - _Betta_ - -_(si avvicina al Commissario: gli sorride sardonicamente, e, con voce -melliflua, gli dice:)_ Quando amate sul serio, caro Commissario, siete -vendicativo coi vostri rivali. Avete punito il brigadiere... della -serva; ma non avete sentito il bisogno di punire il ladro... della -moglie. - - _Il Commissario_ - -_(solenne)_ Signora! Vi prego di credere... che la legge non uguale -per tutti! Cio no.... 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-
-.. meta::
- :PG.Id: 37934
- :PG.Title: Non fare ad altri....
- :PG.Released: 2011-11-05
- :PG.Rights: Public Domain
- :PG.Producer: Carlo Traverso
- :PG.Producer: Claudio Paganelli
- :PG.Producer: Barbara Magni
- :PG.Producer: the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
- :PG.Credits: This file was produced from images generously made available by The Internet Archive.
- :DC.Creator: Roberto Bracco
- :DC.Title: Non fare ad altri...
- :DC.Language: it
- :DC.Created: 1909
- :coverpage: images/cover.jpg
-
-.. style:: title
- :class: center
-
-.. style:: subtitle
- :class: center
-
-.. role:: small-caps
- :class: small-caps
-
-.. style:: block_quote
- :class: small
-
-.. role:: xx-large
- :class: xx-large
-
-.. role:: x-large
- :class: x-large
-
-.. role:: large
- :class: large
-
-.. role:: largeit
- :class: large italics
-
-.. role:: small
- :class: small
-
-.. role:: scene
- :class: italics
-
-=====================
-Non fare ad altri....
-=====================
-
-.. _pg-header:
-
-.. container:: pgheader language-en
-
- .. style:: paragraph
- :class: noindent
-
- This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
- almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
- re-use it under the terms of the `Project Gutenberg License`_
- included with this eBook or online at
- http://www.gutenberg.org/license.
-
-
-
- |
-
- .. _pg-machine-header:
-
- .. container::
-
- Title: Non fare ad altri...
-
- Author: Roberto Bracco
-
- Release Date: November 05, 2011 [EBook #37934]
-
- Language: Italian
-
- Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
- |
-
- .. _pg-start-line:
-
- \*\*\* START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NON FARE AD ALTRI.... \*\*\*
-
- |
- |
- |
- |
-
- .. _pg-produced-by:
-
- .. container::
-
- Produced by Carlo Traverso, Claudio Paganelli, Barbara Magni, and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net.
-
- |
-
- This file was produced from images generously made available by The Internet Archive.
-
-
-.. container:: coverpage
-
- .. image:: images/cover.jpg
- :align: center
-
-.. container:: titlepage
-
- .. class:: center
-
- | :large:`ROBERTO BRACCO`
- |
- | :xx-large:`TEATRO`
- |
- | :large:`VOLUME PRIMO`
- |
- | **NON FARE AD ALTRI...** — LUI LEI LUI —
- | UN'AVVENTURA DI VIAGGIO — UNA DONNA —
- | LE DISILLUSE — DOPO IL VEGLIONE
- |
- | :small:`2ª EDIZIONE.`
- |
- |
- |
- | REMO SANDRON — Editore
- |
- | :small:`Libraio della Real Casa`
- | :small:`MILANO-PALERMO-NAPOLI`
-
-.. container:: verso
-
- .. class:: center
-
- PROPRIETÀ LETTERARIA
-
- *I diritti di riproduzione e di traduzione sono riservati
- per tutti i paesi, non escluso il Regno di Svezia e quello
- di Norvegia.*
-
- È assolutamente proibito di rappresentare questi lavori
- senza il consenso scritto dell'Autore *(Art. 14 del Testo Unico
- 17 Settembre 1882)*.
-
- Published in Palermo, 10th. June Privilege of Copyright in the United
- States reserved under the Act approved March 3rd. 1905, by Roberto Bracco
- and Remo Sandron.
-
- Off. Tip. Sandron — 126 — I — 290312.
-
-[pg!5]
-
-
-
-
-*NOTA DELL'EDITORE.*
-====================
-
-*(Dalla edizione precedente)*
------------------------------
-
-*Compilando — con un necessario ritardo — il primo
-volume del «Teatro» di* Roberto Bracco, *ho voluto
-raccogliere, oltre le sue prime commedie in un atto e
-il dramma* «Una donna», *anche qualche curioso saggio
-della sua più spicciola e più leggera produzione
-scenica che andava fino alla fiaba con «couplets»
-alla francese e fino allo «scherzo comico» per «cafè-chantant».
-Mi è parso opportuno dare a questo
-primo volume la impronta fedele di quella varietà
-saltuaria con cui Roberto Bracco, tra una corrispondenza
-amena destinata al* «Capitan Fracassa» *e una
-canzoncina destinata alla festa di Piedigrotta, tra
-una novelletta e un articolo critico, inavvedutamente,
-cominciava ad esercitare le sue facoltà di commediografo.
-Erano prove involontarie, pigre e rade,
-non determinate che da circostanze occasionali.*
-
-*Alla ribalta esordì, infatti, scrivendo la breve commedia
-buffa* «Non fare ad altri...» *per soddisfare
-la insistente richiesta di Ermete Novelli, già in rinomanza
-di attor comico. Aveva pubblicate, dopo il
-volume delle* Frottole di baby,
-[pg!6]
-*alcune novelle dialogate,
-chiamandole «novelle in un atto» e ne dovette
-rifare due per la scena:* «Lui Lei Lui» *e* «Un'avventura
-di viaggio», *perchè Arturo Garzes volle
-rappresentare la prima, Pia Marchi la seconda. E
-i quattro atti di* «Una donna» *sarebbero rimasti — com'è
-noto — seppelliti nella sua scrivania, se un suo
-amico intimo, Valentino Gervasi, non li avesse rivelati
-alla gentile precocità artistica di Tina di Lorenzo,
-appena diciottenne. I fogli del manoscritto
-uscirono quasi ingialliti dal nascondiglio dove avevano
-dormito per quattro o cinque anni. L'autore li
-rinverdì mutando qualche cosa, e li consegnò al suggeritore.*
-
-*Queste poche notizie, e qualche altra che i lettori
-troveranno più avanti, mi sono sembrate necessarie
-a completare la fisonomia di questo primo volume del
-«Teatro» di* Roberto Bracco.
-
-*Intanto, mi compiaccio di annunziare la ristampa
-dei volumi già pubblicati: anche di quelli che sono
-ora alla seconda edizione. Sarà una ristampa che
-l'Autore curerà personalmente, sicchè alcune inesattezze
-del testo spariranno. Di qualche lavoro, come
-per esempio, del dramma* «Maternità», *qualche pagina
-sarà addirittura mutata, perchè il testo delle
-precedenti edizioni non è sempre identico a quello che
-l'Autore preferisce per le rappresentazioni.*
-
- | Maggio, 1909.
-
-.. class:: right
-
-REMO SANDRON.
-
------
-
-.. clearpage::
-
-[pg!7]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :x-large:`NON FARE AD ALTRI....`
-|
-| :largeit:`Commedia in un atto`
-
-rappresentata per la prima volta al *Sannazaro* di
-*Napoli* da :small-caps:`Ermete Novelli`, la sera del *22 dicembre
-1886*.
-
-[pg!8]
-
-.. clearpage::
-
-[pg!9]
-
-.. class:: center large
-
-PERSONAGGI:
-
- .. class:: large
-
- | :small-caps:`Il Commissario di polizia.`
- | :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere Malomone.`
- | :small-caps:`La guardia Fasanisi.`
- | :small-caps:`Oscar Gentiletti.`
- | :small-caps:`La signora Betta.`
- |
- | La scena è in una piccola città di provincia.
-
-.. class:: small
-
-N. B. Quando questa farsa fu scritta, il *Commissario di Polizia*
-si chiamava *Ispettore*. Ma nel testo della farsa qui riprodotto,
-essendo quello ancora talvolta recitato da qualche attor comico, è
-adottato l'attuale titolo di *Commissario*.
-[pg!10]
-
-[pg!11]
-
-
-
-
-ATTO UNICO.
-===========
-
-
-*Il gabinetto del* :small-caps:`Commissario di Polizia`: — *scrivania,
-scaffali, seggiole*, ecc.
-
-
-SCENA I.
---------
-
-IL COMMISSARIO, IL BRIGADIERE, LA GUARDIA.
-``````````````````````````````````````````
-
-*(Il Commissario è seduto presso la sua scrivania
-con aria grave e autorevole. Ritti, innanzi a lui,
-stanno il brigadiere Malomone, che è molto grasso,
-fornito di foltissimi mustacchi, di foltissime sopracciglie,
-di occhi truci, e la guardia Fasanisi,
-che è un omino magro, sottilissimo.)*
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(ai due)* Continuate, dunque, continuate.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Erano circa le undici, quando io attraversavo per
-caso quella via...
-
-[pg!12]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Questo particolare me lo avete già favorito parecchie
-volte.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-E mi trovavo a una quarantina di passi dal luogo
-del disastro.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Quale disastro?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-La caduta dell'uomo dall'alto del muricciolo.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Voi accorreste al tonfo...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Al tonfo?... *(Riflette)* Al tonfo?... Non lo so.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Ma che cosa non sapete?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(con stupida importanza)* Non so se fu proprio
-un... tonfo.
-
-[pg!13]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Non sentiste cadere l'uomo?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Feci di più, signor Commissario: sentii e vidi:
-ma, quanto al tonfo, in coscienza, non posso dire
-nulla di esatto.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Bestia!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Proprio così. «Siete una bestia!»... dissi io alla
-guardia Fasanisi, perchè non s'era trovata puntualmente
-un poco prima al posto dove l'uomo doveva
-cadere. Un buon piantone certe cose le prevede;
-e Fasanisi, ieri sera, era precisamente lui di piantone
-alla strada che rasenta il giardino appartenente
-alla Signoria Vostra.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Ed egli accorse con voi, che..., come mi avete
-fatto sapere, attraversavate...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere` *e* :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(insieme)*... per caso quella via.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-Io accorsi prima di lui.
-
-[pg!14]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Andate avanti, Malomone!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Sì, signor Commissario: avanti, sempre!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Che pensaste quando vedeste quell'uomo precipitato
-giù dal muro che separa la strada dal giardino
-di casa mia?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Io subito pensai: quest'uomo... è un uomo precipitato
-giù dal muro che separa la strada dal giardino
-del signor Commissario di polizia.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Evidentemente, egli, dal giardino, voleva uscire
-di nascosto...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Ed io, senza perdere tempo, gli domandai: perchè
-volevate uscire di nascosto dal giardino del
-signor Commissario di polizia?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-L'uomo s'imbarazzò?
-
-[pg!15]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(riflette)* Non lo so... perchè era ancora disteso a
-terra.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-E che rispose?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Rispose: *(riflette)* «Ho un fianco rotto.» Allora
-io gli dissi: «voi siete un ladro.» Allora egli mi
-disse: «sì, sono un ladro.» Allora io gli dissi:
-«voi siete in arresto.» Allora egli mi disse: «sì,
-sono in arresto.»
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Non oppose resistenza?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Signor Commissario, si lasciò arrestare come un
-galantuomo. Io e Fasanisi, gentilmente, lo afferrammo
-per il collo e lo andammo a depositare in
-prigione.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Cammin facendo, che aspetto ebbe?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(riflette)* Signor Commissario, nessun aspetto!
-
-[pg!16]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Dio buono, voglio dire: che contegno serbò?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Ah! il contegno non lo so.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(canzonando)* Perchè forse era ancora disteso a
-terra?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-No. Cammin facendo, non era più disteso a terra.
-Era...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-In piedi?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Nemmeno. Era... zoppicante.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(alla guardia)* E voi, Fasanisi, avete altro da aggiungere?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-Sì, signor Commissario.
-
-[pg!17]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Aggiungete!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-*(a voce alta)* Io accorsi prima di lui.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Non è vero!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-*(alzando viepiù la voce)* Io accorsi prima di lui...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Basta così, Fasanisi! Il brigadiere ha ragione,
-perchè è vostro superiore. E questo è tutto ciò che
-avevate da aggiungere?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-Questo. *(Continua a dire per conto suo, borbottando:)*
-Io accorsi prima di lui... Io accorsi prima
-di lui...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Ora è necessario *(scrivendo in fretta un biglietto)*
-ch'io sappia che cosa è riuscito a rubarmi quel
-farabutto. Fasanisi, questo biglietto a casa mia.
-*(Glielo consegna.)* Subito!
-
-[pg!18]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-*(va via borbottando ancora:)* Io accorsi prima di
-lui...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Eh, perbacco! Un ladro che va a rubare in casa
-del Commissario di polizia deve essere un bel cretino!
-Che ne dite, Malomone?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Ecco, signor Commissario. Una volta mi avvenne
-un fatto simile. Un mariuolo, senza curarsi
-ch'io ero un brigadiere di polizia, mi rubò il fazzoletto
-dalla saccoccia.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Oh! imbecille!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Chi?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Voi!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(piantandosi da bravo militare)* Precisamente!
-L'imbecille è sempre il derubato!
-
-[pg!19]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(seccato)* Malomone, introducete l'arrestato. *(Il
-brigadiere esce.)* E adesso facciamo la conoscenza
-di quest'altro bell'arnese! *(Pensando e ricordandosi)*
-Sicuro! Alle undici pomeridiane, io entro in
-casa... È evidente: il ladro teme di essere sorpreso,
-si dà alla fuga, e patapuffete! giù dal muricciolo.
-Si lascia arrestare perchè... ha un fianco
-rotto, e, cammin facendo, serba, come assicura
-Malomone, un contegno... zoppicante. Tutto mi è
-completamente chiaro, e con me non c'è troppo
-da scherzare...
-
-
-SCENA II.
----------
-
-IL COMMISSARIO, IL BRIGADIERE *e* OSCAR.
-````````````````````````````````````````
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(entra, tirando pel braccio Oscar Gentiletti, che
-è un bel giovine sulla trentina, elegantemente vestito.)*
-Ecco il malfattore!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Eh! non c'è bisogno di trascinarmi così...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(a Oscar, in tono burbero e dignitoso)* Avanzatevi!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(lievemente zoppicando, si avanza e s'inchina cortesemente)*
-Servo suo, cavaliere.
-
-[pg!20]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(con orgogliosa compiacenza)* Ma come fate a sapere
-che sono cavaliere?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Le si legge in fronte.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Grazie! *(Dopo averlo guardato attentamente da
-capo a piedi, chiama a sè il brigadiere:)* Malomone,
-venite qua. *(Il brigadiere gli si accosta.)* Sentite,
-*(Sottovoce, all'orecchio)* Siete certo d'avermi introdotto
-l'individuo che arrestaste iersera?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Vostra Signoria mi crederebbe capace d'introdurle
-un individuo per un altro?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-No, ma gli è che quegli abiti... quel volto...
-quel... quel...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Gli si vede subito il delinquente, signor Commissario.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Credete che gli si veda subito? Quand'è così,
-*(disponendosi a scrivere)* procediamo all'interrogatorio.
-[pg!21]
-*(A Oscar, bruscamente)* Ehi! dico, il vostro
-nome?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Oscar Gentiletti.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Età?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Trent'anni.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(piano, al brigadiere)* Malomone, trent'anni! Non
-li dimostra.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(con profonda convinzione e sicurezza)* Ma li ha!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(a Oscar)* Domicilio?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Strada San Petronio, numero sette, primo piano,
-porta a destra.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Professione?
-
-[pg!22]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(subitamente)* Ladro.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(annotando, tra sè)* Evviva la franchezza! *(Con
-disgusto)* Sicchè, voi avete dedicata la vostra vita...?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-A rubare.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(violentemente)* Vergogna!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(con delicatezza insinuante)* Scusi, cavaliere, abbia
-la cortesia di astenersi da qualunque commento
-o rimbrotto. Veda, è questione di vocazione: lei
-fa il Commissario di polizia, io faccio il ladro. E
-in questo momento, ne sono tanto più lieto, inquantochè,
-essendo ladro, io ho il piacere di poterle
-dedicare la mia servitù.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(imbarazzandosi)* Oh!... troppo buono... Accomodatevi...
-si accomodi... prego... segga... deponga...
-il cappello.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(sedendo e posando il cappello)* Per accontentarla...
-
-[pg!23]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Dunque..., signor ladro..., voi confessate... lei
-confessa che ieri sera s'intromise nel giardino di
-casa mia per...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(premuroso)* Per commettere un furto.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Ma...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(con risentimento)* Metterebbe ella in dubbio la
-mia parola?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Oh no!, tutt'altro! Le pare! Ma..., ed ecco ciò
-che stavo per dire,... come va, egregio signor ladro,
-come va che le saltò il ticchio di commettere
-un furto proprio in mia casa, — in casa del Commissario
-di polizia?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Le dirò... I pubblici funzionarii sono la mia
-specialità.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Ah! me ne compiaccio. E..., perdoni, veh, se
-l'importuno con tante domande, ma, sa, se io non
-[pg!24]
-domandassi, lei non mi risponderebbe... Dunque,
-dicevo: come fece per intromettersi nel giardino?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-In un modo semplicissimo: sfuggendo alla vigilanza
-d'una guardia... che dormiva, e scavalcando
-il muro dove questo è molto basso.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(al brigadiere)* Malomone, sentite, eh?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Sento, signor Commissario.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-La guardia dormiva.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Signor Commissario, quella guardia che dormiva
-era la guardia Fasanisi. Potevano essere circa le
-undici quando io attraversavo....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario e Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(insieme)*... per caso quella via.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Lo so. Tacete, ora. *(A Oscar)* E... se non sono
-troppo indiscreto..., dica: perchè, poi, nella fuga,
-[pg!25]
-ella andò a scavalcare il muro dove esso è più
-alto?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Capirà: non avevo mica l'intenzione di capitombolare,
-io. Ma gli è che non ero pratico del giardino.
-Era quella la prima volta che ci mettevo il
-piede, e, nel buio, correndo, sbagliai la strada.
-*(Involontariamente)* Un'altra volta, starò più attento...
-Pardon... dico per dire....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(alzandosi e avvicinandosi a Oscar)* E se dice per
-fare, s'inganna a partito, perchè, sa, con tutto il
-rispetto dovuto a un ladro per bene come lei, la
-giustizia provvederà.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Torniamo a bomba, cavaliere. Su questo, siamo
-d'accordo. Io m'intromisi nel suo giardino per commettere
-un furto.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Benone! *(Con furberia ed intimità, sedendogli
-accanto)* Dal giardino, ella passò nel salottino di
-casa mia....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Appunto: in quel grazioso salottino turco... con
-quei ventaglioni... quei tappeti... quelle anfore...
-quel microscopico scrignetto di madreperla....
-
-[pg!26]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Sì, lo scrignetto è carino. L'ho comperato all'Esposizione
-di Parigi, e ci tengo!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Ha ragione!... E quei *biscuits* civettuoli!... E
-quei gingilli!... Oh! un salottino delizioso!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Pih! non c'è malaccio; ma, per ora, sa, è abbozzato.
-Bisogna che io faccia ancora delle spese.... E
-se lei mi onorerà... *(correggendosi e impacciandosi)*
-Cioè... no: se lei... mi ruberà... cioè....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(vivamente)* Io ho già rubato, cavaliere! Ho già
-rubato!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Dunque, reo confesso?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Nè più, nè meno.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(dopo aver ammiccato al brigadiere)* Tanto meglio!
-Ci dica, ora, che cosa ha rubato. I danari
-contenuti nello scrigno?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-No!
-
-[pg!27]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-I ninnoli d'argento?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-No!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Gli oggetti d'avorio?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-No!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Il tamtam giapponese?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-No!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-I ventagli? le anfore? i tappeti? le seggiole? i
-muri?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-No! No!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(infuriato)* Ma allora che diavolo ha rubato, lei?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Già! Che diavolo ho rubato, io?
-
-[pg!28]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Probabilmente, ella tentò di rubare, ma non potette
-consumare il furto.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Che ho da dirle...?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(in tono confidenziale)* E sa lei perchè non riescì
-a consumarlo?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-No....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Lei non riescì a consumarlo, perchè verso le undici....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-... io attraversavo per caso quella via....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Zitto, Malomone! Non è questa la ragione. *(A
-Oscar)* Lei non riescì a consumare il furto perchè
-verso le undici sentì un rumore.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(di scatto)* Verissimo!
-
-[pg!29]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Ebbene, *(con alterigia)* quel rumore... ero io!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Ahimè, cavaliere, le giuro sul mio onore che ella
-giunse a tempo!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Sicchè, lei ritira la confessione?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-La ritiro!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(tutto tronfio, ritornando alla scrivania)* E adesso,
-Malomone, facciamo il nostro dovere e procediamo
-alla regolare perquisizione dell'arrestato.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Ma sono già stato perquisito ieri sera.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Malomone, trovaste armi bianche?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-No, signor Commissario.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Armi da fuoco?
-
-[pg!30]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Da fuoco, soltanto una scatola di fiammiferi.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Frugaste nelle saccocce? Sequestraste oggetti,
-carte, grimaldelli?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Non sequestrai, signor Commissario, perchè non
-frugai.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Cosicchè, è necessaria una seconda e minuta
-perquisizione.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-.. class:: center
-
-*(s'avvicina a Oscar.)*
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(in orgasmo)* Le assicuro, cavaliere, che se avessi
-qualche cosa da esibire alla giustizia, mi farei
-un pregio di offrirla a lei. Ma è inutile fare una
-perquisizione quando non c'è nulla da trovare...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(con sussiego)* Le perquisizioni si fanno quasi
-sempre allo scopo di non trovare niente! Malomone,
-perquisite.
-
-[pg!31]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-.. class:: center
-
-*(mette le mani addosso a Oscar.)*
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(ribellandosi)* Ah! questo poi no! *(cerca di svincolarsi.)*
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(con austerità e calore)* Signor ladro, lasciate
-che l'autorità competente eserciti pienamente il
-suo potere sulla vostra persona!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(convellendosi)* Ma mi fa il solletico!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(cacciandogli le mani nelle saccocce e palpandolo
-dappertutto)* Taci, furfante!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Ah ah ah... mi fa il solletico....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(cavando fuori gli oggetti a uno a uno)* Signor
-Commissario, un orologio *(con solennità)* à remontoir.
-Catena... idem! La scatola di fiammiferi... suddetta!
-Un portasigari... senza sigari! Un fazzoletto
-*(annusandolo)* profumato, molto profumato...
-*(Porge tutto al Commissario.)*
-
-[pg!32]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(annusando anche lui il fazzoletto)* Opoponax!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(spalancando gli occhi come per una allarmante
-scoperta)* Perdio! *(Indi, continua a frugare.)*
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Basta, ora! Basta!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Taci, furfante! *(palpa ancora)*... E questo è un
-portafogli... gravido anzi che no! *(Lo consegna al
-Commissario.)*
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(pallidissimo)* È fatta!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Non c'è altro?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Non c'è altro.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(con grande gravità)* Esaminiamo i reperti. *(Osserva
-l'orologio, la catena, la scatola, il fazzoletto,
-il portasigari, e borbotta:)* Orologio à remontoir, — catena...
-[pg!33]
-idem, — eccetera... eccetera... *(Quindi,
-apre il portafogli e ne guarda il contenuto, mentre
-Oscar, affisandolo, allibisce e, senza fiatare, aspetta. — A
-un tratto, il Commissario, cavando una fotografia
-da una busta, spalanca gli occhi, e, con un
-gesto di raccapriccio, esclama tra sè:)* Il ritratto di
-mia moglie!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(notando l'emozione)* Il signor Commissario ha
-forse trovato...?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(furibondo)* Un corno!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Del signor Commissario?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(padroneggiandosi)* Ritiratevi, voi!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(andandosene)* Sarà un oggetto di grande valore.
-*(via)*.
-
-[pg!34]
-
-
-SCENA III.
-----------
-
-IL COMMISSARIO *e* OSCAR.
-`````````````````````````
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-.. class:: center
-
-*(resta immobile, con gli sguardi fissi a terra.)*
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(abbandona la testa fra le mani, e, dopo una
-lunga pausa, si risolve, dignitosamente e autorevolmente,
-a parlare.)* Questo, o signore, è il ritratto
-di mia moglie.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-No!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Come «no»? Non mi verrete voi a insegnare la
-faccia di mia moglie!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Ebbene, ne convengo: questo è... presso a poco...
-il ritratto di sua moglie. Ma... l'ho rubato. Glie
-l'avevo detto io. Cavaliere, la prego di credere che
-io sono un ladro.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Oh! finiamola! C'è la dedica che vi smentisce.
-*(legge:)* «Al mio Oscar — Betta». E poi, più sotto:
-«Ore dieci e mezzo, 25 ottobre 1883»: la data di
-[pg!35]
-ieri. *(Continuando a leggere:)* «Prologo del nostro
-amore». — Orrore!... *(si mette le mani nei capelli.)*
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Via, cavaliere, non si disperi così! Che cos'è, poi,
-un prologhetto?!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(con solennità)* Come vedete, o signore, voi non
-siete più un ladro; *(con disprezzo)* voi siete semplicemente
-un uomo come un altro!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(desolato)* Sventurato me!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Ed io non sono più il Commissario di polizia:
-no! *(Con pari disprezzo)* io sono un marito... come
-tanti altri! *(Pausa.)* Prendete i vostri oggetti, signore.
-*(Glieli rende.)* Questo ritratto mi basterà
-per fare arrossire quella donna! *(Lo rimette nella
-busta, e lo caccia in una tasca interna del soprabito.)*
-Sarò inesorabile!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Cavaliere, lei mi è testimonio che io ho fatto
-tutto il possibile per salvarla. Le raccomando:
-glielo dica; mi giustifichi lei; non mi faccia fare
-una cattiva figura!
-
-[pg!36]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(con gentilezza)* Oh! non dubiti! Lei si è regolato
-benissimo: da perfetto gentiluomo.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Grazie, cavaliere!
-
-
-SCENA IV.
----------
-
-IL COMMISSARIO, OSCAR, BETTA *e* LA GUARDIA.
-````````````````````````````````````````````
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-*(di dentro)* È permesso?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Entrate.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-*(fermandosi sulla soglia)* Signor Commissario,
-ho consegnato il biglietto alla sua signora. Ella è
-qui!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Lei!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Giunge a proposito. Dite che favorisca.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-.. class:: center
-
-*(va via.)*
-
-[pg!37]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-*(entra disinvolta)* Son venuta io stessa a... *(Sorpresa
-e sconcertata, tra sè)* Oscar!... *(Al commissario,
-sforzandosi di nascondere l'impressione ricevuta)*
-Son venuta io stessa a....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(trattenendo l'ira)* A darmi i chiarimenti che
-desidero.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-Si tratterebbe d'un furto commesso in casa nostra.
-Mi pare che m'hai scritto così. Ma come? Ma
-quando? Non capisco. In casa ho rovistato dappertutto,
-e non manca assolutamente nulla.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Ah sì? Assolutamente nulla? Il caso è davvero
-singolare. Un ladro è, senza dubbio, penetrato in
-casa nostra poco prima delle dieci e mezzo di iersera;
-e quindi, dandosi alla fuga, è cascato dal
-muro del giardino e s'è fracassato....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-*(ansiosa)* S'è fracassato?...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(sogghignando)* Quasi niente; ma, in compenso,
-è stato arrestato!
-
-[pg!38]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-*(parlando a stento)* Ma era, poi, certamente un
-ladro?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Non è vero, Oscar Gentiletti? Avete voi confessato
-d'essere un ladro?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(balbettando)* Sì, cavaliere....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-.. class:: center
-
-*(ha un sorriso di gratitudine.)*
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-E, intanto, in casa nostra, non manca assolutamente
-nulla! Anzi, forse, chi sa, a cercar bene,...
-ci si troverebbe qualche cosa di più!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-È strano!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-È stranissimo! Ma udite, udite, moglie mia,
-quest'altro particolare anche più strano. Io ho fatto
-perquisire il ladro.... Ebbene, gli è stato trovato
-indosso... *(ringhiando)* il vostro ritratto! *(in fretta,
-cava di tasca una fotografia e gliela getta innanzi.)*
-
-[pg!39]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-*(raccogliendo il ritratto e animandosi d'un subito)*
-Il ritratto della nostra serva!!?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(in un sussulto di rabbia e mortificazione, tra sè)*
-Maledetto!... mi sono sbagliato!...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-*(riacquistando coraggio)* E c'è perfino una dedica,
-e che dedica! È firmata «Teresina», e dice: *(legge:)*
-«Al mio *amatisime Cucù*».
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(fingendo meraviglia)* *Cucù*!?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-*Cucù*!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*Cucù*!!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-Ah! ora comprendo!... *(Con malizia)* Il signore...
-come si chiama?... insomma il signor *Cucù*... è
-un ladro di cuori. Ma è discreto. Si contenta di
-rubare quello delle serve.
-
-[pg!40]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(tra sè, rallegrandosi)* Magnifico!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(a Betta, fremendo)* Smettete, signora moglie!
-Il ritratto trovato indosso a lui è un altro... *(Lo
-cerca nelle tasche.)*
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-*(seria)* Prego, signor marito. Se possedeste il
-ritratto della nostra serva senza averlo trovato indosso
-all'amante di lei, l'*amatisime Cucù* non sarebbe
-più lui *(indicando Oscar)*, ma, caro Commissario,
-sareste voi! A conti fatti, non vi resta che
-mettere in libertà l'amante. Quanto a me, provvederò
-a mettere in libertà... la serva!
-
-
-SCENA V.
---------
-
-IL COMMISSARIO, OSCAR, BETTA, IL BRIGADIERE, *poi* LA GUARDIA.
-``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(mordendosi le labbra, suona il campanello. Il
-brigadiere compare)* Malomone, liberate il signore!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Il ladro?
-
-[pg!41]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Ma che ladro!... Purtroppo, egli è innocente!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(avvicinandosi a Oscar e stringendogli la mano)*
-Le mie congratulazioni!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(piano a Malomone)* Sì, sì, ma sarebbe meglio
-che pensaste ai casi vostri quando alle undici della
-sera state in colloquio amoroso... con qualche
-Teresina... presso il giardino del Commissario!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(a bassa voce, in preda a una forte commozione)*
-Avete detto al signor Commissario d'avermici visto?!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Naturalmente. *(Tra sè)* Ora li servo io tutti e due!
-*(A Malomone)* Egli aspetta che vi discolpiate.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(con una risoluzione coraggiosa si rivolge al
-Commissario, gridando.)* Signor Commissario!...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(che era assorto, salta dalla sedia.)* Cos'è?!
-
-[pg!42]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Erano circa le undici quando io... non attraversavo
-per caso quella via.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(infastidito)* Non me ne importa niente!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Io debbo discolparmi, signor Commissario!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Auff! Discolpatevi, ma... velocemente.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Noi due ci parlavamo, è vero; ma essa era
-dentro, ed io ero fuori!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-Essa, chi?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-Teresina.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(trasalendo)* Teresina!?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(piantandosi militarmente e portando la mano
-alla visiera, come se urgesse il saluto militare.)*
-[pg!43]
-Signor commissario..., è la natura che lo vuole!
-Io sono giovane... ella è giovane... siamo giovani
-tutti e due... Ci vedemmo, ci piacemmo, ci guardammo,
-ci parlammo, ci amammo.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-Oh! questa è carina! Il brigadiere è il rivale
-di *Cucù*.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(scoppiando)* Ed è così, Malomone, che la sera
-vegliate alla sicurezza della città? Voi mentite al
-Commissario di polizia, voi testimoniate il falso,
-voi disonorate la divisa di brigadiere! La vostra
-condotta, Malomone, è scandalosa. *(Suona il campanello.
-Si avanza la guardia Fasanisi.)* Fasanisi,
-mettete agli arresti il brigadiere Malomone.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-Insieme col ladro?
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-No! del ladro non so che farmene!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-*(a Malomone)* Brigadiere Malomone, in nome
-della legge io vi arresto!
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Brigadiere`
-
-*(consegnandogli tragicamente la daga)* Teresina,
-tutto per te! *(A un cenno di Fasanisi, va via a
-passi gravi, col capo chino e le braccia piegate.)*
-
-[pg!44]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`La Guardia`
-
-*(seguendolo maestosamente)* Io accorsi prima di
-lui....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-*(tutto cerimonioso, va a stringere la mano al
-Commissario)* Cavaliere, scusi l'incomodo....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(inconsciamente cerimonioso anche lui, l'accompagna
-sino alla porta)* Oh! si figuri....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-Fortunatissimo d'averla conosciuta....
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-La fortuna è tutta mia.... Si conservi...
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-A rivederla.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-A rivederla.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Oscar`
-
-.. class:: center
-
-*(esce.)*
-
-[pg!45]
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Betta`
-
-*(si avvicina al Commissario: gli sorride sardonicamente,
-e, con voce melliflua, gli dice:)* Quando
-amate sul serio, caro Commissario, siete vendicativo
-coi vostri rivali. Avete punito il brigadiere...
-della serva; ma non avete sentito il bisogno di
-punire il ladro... della moglie.
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :small-caps:`Il Commissario`
-
-*(solenne)* Signora! Vi prego di credere... che la
-legge non è uguale per tutti! Cioè no.... Che diavolo
-mi fate dire!...
-
-.. vspace:: 2
-
-.. class:: center
-
-| :scene:`(Sipario.)`
-
-|
-|
-|
-|
-|
-
-.. _pg_end_line:
-
-\*\*\* END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NON FARE AD ALTRI.... \*\*\*
-
-.. backmatter::
-
-.. toc-entry::
- :depth: 0
-
-.. _pg-footer:
-
-.. class:: pgfooter language-en
-
-A Word from Project Gutenberg
-=============================
-
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