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- THE HERO
-
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost
-no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it
-under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this
-eBook or online at http://www.gutenberg.org/license.
-
-Title: The Hero
-
-Author: Elaine Wilber
-
-Release Date: April 04, 2011 [EBook #35770]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HERO ***
-
-
-
+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 35770 ***
Produced by Frank van Drogen, Greg Weeks, and the Online Distributed
Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net.
@@ -632,377 +611,4 @@ willing to stand guard all the time?"
Fiction February 1958. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence
that the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HERO ***
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+*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 35770 ***
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- THE HERO
-
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost
-no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it
-under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this
-eBook or online at http://www.gutenberg.org/license.
-
-Title: The Hero
-
-Author: Elaine Wilber
-
-Release Date: April 04, 2011 [EBook #35770]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HERO ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by Frank van Drogen, Greg Weeks, and the Online Distributed
-Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
- THE HERO
-
- BY ELAINE WILBER
-
- _Willy was undoubtedly a hero. The difficulty lies in deciding
- which side he was on...._
-
-
-[Illustration: __Illustrated by Paul Orban__]
-
-
-Two months after the landing, Ship UXB-69311 was rigged out with most
-things needed to make life bearable, if not interesting, for the crew.
-Perched on the manicured, blue-green sod of the planet Engraham, its
-inner parts were transformed and refitted for the many months of the
-Exploration. No effort and no flight of imagination had been spared to
-make the ship resemble more a country club than a barracks. With the
-permission of Colonel Mondrain, the crew's bunkroom had been completely
-rearranged, and a segment thereof made into a quietly elegant bar. Plans
-for this eventual rejuvenation had been fomenting throughout the very
-tiresome and very monotonous journey.
-
-When they first landed, the natives fled, and thus it was easy to
-liberate furnishings from the adjacent village. When the inhabitants
-returned, after the purposes of the visiting Earthman were acknowledged
-to be harmless, they proved to be too courteous to carp about a few
-missing articles.
-
-The chairs, of a very advanced design and most comfortable, were made of
-a light and durable metal alloy thus far unknown to Earth. The bar
-(which was probably not its purpose on Engraham, no one knew or cared
-what its function had been) was of a design so futuristic that it would
-have turned a modern artist mad. The utensils, also liberated, were
-unbelievably delicate, yet strong and easy to wash. At first, since the
-Earth had not intended the Exploration to resemble the type that
-Texas-stationed servicemen like to run in Matamoros, there was nothing
-to drink in the utensils. But hardly six weeks had passed before the
-first hero of the Exploration, a man named O'Connors, discovered a
-palatable fruit growing on nearby bushes. By means of a system of
-improvised pipes (also liberated) it was no time at all before tasty
-beverages, somewhat strident but quite effective, were being run off and
-consumed in quantities. The machine known as O'Connors Joy-Juicer was
-concealed behind the bar, and all that was ever seen on the bar when
-Colonel Mondrain or the Doctors were around was an innocuous fruit
-juice.
-
-The Earth Command had stocked the ship with reading material, most of it
-of a disgustingly educational nature, in photostatic cards: and the
-second hero of the Exploration was a man named Kosalowsky, who
-discovered in the psychology sections the works of Freud and
-Krafft-Ebing. After this discovery, a few interesting discussions arose.
-
-After these changes had been made, there was very little to do.
-
-The Earth Command had assumed that the natives of Engraham would resent
-the Explorations (most planets did), and so had sent along the crew of
-thirty men for protection. All had labored mightily to become part of
-this special crew, chosen for endurance and known war-like qualities.
-For once they got back to Earth, all were slated to be mustered out of
-service immediately, decorated to the ears, and awarded full, life-time
-pensions. Many already had contracts to appear on television and one
-man, Blunt, hinted at a long term Hollywood contract.
-
-But once they got there, there was little to do after all. A guard was
-posted; instruments were checked; and, although the necessity seemed
-slight, the ship was kept primed for instantaneous emergency take-off.
-On the day corresponding to Earth's Saturday, the ship was G. I.'d from
-stem to stern. The maintenance crew made sure that no parts deteriorated
-or got liberated by enterprising natives. But the natives were not an
-inventive race. It was discovered by the Doctors (Anker, Frank, Pelham
-and Flandeau) that the natives literally did not know how to steal. They
-were backward. Dr. Flandeau, who was making great strides with the
-language, reported that there was some evidence that the Engrahamites
-had once possessed this skill, along with murder, mayhem, bad faith, and
-politics, but had lost it, through a deterioration of the species.
-
-Thus, once the ship had been transformed into a place worthy of human
-dwelling, and the beverage question had been solved, and utter,
-imbecilic boredom circumvented by the timely discoveries of Freud and
-Krafft-Ebing, the men found time hanging heavily on their hands; and the
-more the doctors discovered about the Engrahamites, the more dismal the
-situation became. The doctors, growing more and more fascinated by their
-tasks, left the ship bright and early each day, returning around
-nightfall to reduce their growing stacks of data to points of Earthly
-relevance. The Colonel was also out most of the time. He paid many
-social calls on the natives, who, being courteous, received him, and was
-often returned at night in a chauffeured native Hop-Hop. Life in the
-bunkroom became a sullen round of poker, reading of Krafft-Ebing, and
-gab: and Earth currency changed hands daily in the never-ending crap
-game.
-
-For there was one great lack in their lives. This lack, and the
-inability to do anything about it, absorbed many hours of conversation.
-At first, complaints only occurred at intervals; but as weeks passed,
-the lamentations became so fervent, so constant, and so heart-rending,
-that Dr. Flandeau observed to Dr. Frank that more stirring passages had
-not been made since the Jeremiad. For Dr. Flandeau, although aging, was
-in his off hours a poet, and a Frenchman always.
-
-Dr. Frank said, "Yes, well, poor bastards."
-
-At first, nostalgically, the crew harked back to happier times on Earth.
-Soon not one young lady of their collective acquaintance had escaped the
-most minute analysis. They were young men--the oldest, Blunt, was only
-twenty-six--and several of them had married young, greatly limiting
-their activities so that even their cumulative memories could not last
-forever. After several weeks, repetition began to set in. Once all
-successes had been lovingly remembered, down to the last, exquisite
-detail, they began recalling their failures. The master strategist, the
-unofficial referee of these seminars, was Dick Blunt.
-
-"Now where you went wrong there," he would tell a fledgling reporting
-complete zero with a YWCA resident, "was in making her feel that you
-were interested. Your line with a girl like that should be one of
-charity. Pure charity. You impress on her that you're doing her a
-terrific favor. You offer to bring to her dull life romance, adventure,
-tenderness."
-
-"I couldn't even get my hands on her," complained the reproved failure,
-Herbert Banks.
-
-"I've always found that type the easiest ones of all," Blunt said
-indifferently. "Dull, of course."
-
-The testiness, the self-pity, the shortness of temper and the near-riots
-over stolen packages of cigarettes, were not improved after the Doctors,
-having surveyed the situation thoroughly, decided that it would do no
-harm to let the men of the crew go out on Liberty.
-
-Fraternizing with natives was, of course, strictly forbidden. They were
-not to drink off premises. (Nor on, for that matter.) They were exhorted
-not to steal, not to engage in fights.
-
-Still, they could walk around, take pictures of the strange pink houses
-and the dazzling cities. They could watch a covey of children swim in
-the municipal pools. They could look at the fountains, the so-called
-"miraculous fountains of Engraham", or climb the strange, glassy
-mountains. The natives, although shy of them, were most polite, and some
-smiled enchantingly--especially the women.
-
- ----
-
-This was the worst rub of all: there were women, and they were gorgeous.
-A little smaller than most Earth women, with bright eyes, and high,
-arched eyebrows, looking forever as if they had heard the most priceless
-joke. Their faces conformed to the most rigid standards of Caucasian
-beauty. Their legs, so delicate, so tapering, so fantastically small of
-ankle, were breath-taking. Their clothes, which would have driven a
-Parisian designer to suicide, were draped carelessly over the most
-exquisite figures. True, they were a little deficient in one department,
-and this was explained, before they were granted liberty, by Dr.
-Flandeau. The women of Engraham, he said, did not bear children.
-
-This announcement was not received with special gloom, for until then,
-none of the crew had seen an Engrahamite woman. But Willy Lanham, a
-dark-haired, skinny boy from Tennessee, asked, unhappily, "Don't they
-even go in for games or nothin'?"
-
-Flandeau understood instantly. He shook his head sadly. "I should think
-not. It has been a long time since they have observed the normal
-functions. The women are mainly for decoration, although it is said that
-some are also created for brains. They are a most strange people."
-
-After this--granted these agonizing liberties, and able to see that
-which was biologically unattainable--the crew became so demoralized that
-not even Kosalowsky's discovery of the works of Wilhelm Reik relieved
-the deep gloom.
-
-However, they had reckoned without the superior genius of Dick Blunt.
-Blunt received Flandeau's news as unhappily as the others, and, like the
-rest, was made miserable by the sight of the glorious damozels. But he
-was a reasonable man and he put his reasoning powers to work. Soon he
-alone was cheerful. He went around with the absorbed, other-world look
-of a physicist grappling with a problem in ionospheric mathematics
-without the use of an IBM calculator. One day he went on Liberty alone.
-He did not return until the fall of night, and when he came in his
-elation was so immoderate that the others thought there must be bars on
-Engraham after all.
-
-"I have found the answer to our question," he said.
-
-No one needed to ask what question. O'Connors hurried to pour Blunt a
-drink.
-
-"I have spent the day pursuing this answer logically," said Blunt. "I
-have done what any thoughtful man would do. I have read up on it."
-
-"How?" cried Henderson.
-
-"At the library."
-
-Blunt then described his day: finding his way to the library by means of
-pantomime; and finding at last, that file of photographs--photographs of
-an utterly self-explanatory nature. And these he pulled from his pocket,
-for ignoring all discipline, he had stolen them.
-
-The pictures passed from hand to hand. O'Connors passed them on to Pane,
-and suddenly felt the need to open the window behind him. It was Willy
-Lanham, the boy from Tennessee, who voiced those exultant words that
-rose to the throats of all:
-
-He said, "Hey! They're made just like the Earth girls."
-
-The conversation, at this intensely interesting point, was cut short by
-the arrival of the Colonel. He alighted from the native Hop-Hop--waved
-cheerily to its driver, and began coming up. The bottle and glasses
-vanished, and Kosalowsky began to read aloud from a book especially
-reserved for these occasions. The men maintained looks of studious
-interest as the officer went through. He went up the ladder to his own
-quarters, there to write in his growing volume, THE COMING OCCUPATION
-AND GOVERNMENT OF ENGRAHAM. They listened until his door clicked.
-
-The conversation was resumed in more subdued tones.
-
-"Do you think," said Pane shakily, "They still _could_?"
-
-"Not a question of it," Blunt said. "These pictures prove it. It's what
-you might call a lost art. Once upon a time, as with all the fortunate
-parts of the galaxy, this art was known to the Engrahamites. Through
-some terrific foul-up, they lost it. Probably a combination of the
-science of incubation, and the reign of some ghastly square, like Queen
-Victoria. Thus were the girls of Engraham deprived of the pleasures of
-love."
-
-"The men, too," said Willy. All glared at him reproachfully. To care
-about the happiness of the Engrahamite men was thought not quite
-patriotic.
-
-"Gradually," Blunt went on, "they must have begun to lose interest.
-Probably there was some taboo. In the end they probably all thought, oh,
-to hell with it, and began serving on committees."
-
-A long sigh went up.
-
-"It is for us," Blunt said softly, treasuring each word, "to restore
-these unhappy maidens to their original human rights.
-
-"But it isn't going to be easy," Blunt went on. His voice dropped even
-lower. "Think what would happen if it went sour. Those Doctors would get
-wind of it. We'd be stuck in the Ship for the rest of the Exploration."
-
-There was a sober pause. Finally Banks cleared his throat and said,
-"Well, how do you think it should be handled, Blunt?"
-
-"Well, every beachhead needs an invasion," Blunt said, casually holding
-out his glass. O'Connors leapt to fill it. "One guy has got to lay the
-groundwork. Let him enlighten one quail. Explain things to her." He took
-a long, leisurely drink, and sighed. "This quail will rush around
-telling the others. Pretty soon there'll be so many hanging around the
-ship that--"
-
-There was a general rush for cooling beverages.
-
-"Right," someone said, when the faculty of speech was recovered.
-
-"And necessarily," said Blunt, "this has to be the guy with the most
-savvy. The one who knows the score. The one most likely to succeed.
-Check?"
-
-All knew what this was leading up to. Martin said unhappily, "Check,
-Blunt, You're our boy."
-
- ----
-
-Blunt was scheduled to stand guard the next day, but Willy Lanham, eager
-to assist the cause, volunteered to take over for him. The hours seemed
-to creep by. His air was swaggering and cool when he returned, and all
-gathered round with eager curiosity--all but Lanham, who had not
-recovered from standing guard.
-
-Blunt sauntered to the bar, accepted a drink, sipped it, lighted a
-cigarette, and took a long, pensive drag. Finally he said reminiscently,
-"What a doll!"
-
-Pane, never a subtle man, cried in anguish, "Well, how'd you make out?"
-
-Blunt smiled smugly. He began his recital. He was walking along the
-street and he met this gorgeous creature. A full description followed
-(broken by the arrival of the Colonel and two paragraphs of the DECLINE
-AND FALL) making it clear that this was the dish of dishes, the most
-beautiful of the beautiful, the most charming, and the most intelligent.
-She allowed herself to be addressed in Blunt's few words of Engrahamic
-and, smiling ever patiently, sat with him for several hours. Their talk
-took place in a secluded bower, in one of the many parks. She was
-agreeable and charmed and promised to see him again. He even managed,
-through terrific feats of pantomime, to impress on her the need of
-secrecy in future meetings.
-
-"That was all?" someone said, when he finished.
-
-"For the first meeting, I think I did wonders," said Blunt. "After all,
-sex hasn't been known here since a time corresponding to our Stone Age."
-
-Later, when the nightly poker game was beginning, Willy Lanham said,
-"Why didn't you just make a grab for her?"
-
-"That's the hill-billy approach," Blunt said disdainfully. "These girls
-are civilized--very, very civilized. It's important not to shock them."
-
- ----
-
-Blunt's next gambit was to set about learning the language. For this he
-went not to Flandeau, who best knew it, but to Ankers, who was a pure
-scientist in every sense of the word, and not so likely to suspect his
-motives. The girl proved very cultured. She took him to art galleries,
-to symphonies, and mountain climbing, for scrambling up and down the
-glassy hills was a favorite Engrahamic sport. As he advanced in the
-language, he learned that her name was Catataphinaria, which meant "she
-will attain relative wisdom". He found that she worked for the Eleven
-who, while not rulers, offered general suggestions which the populace
-more or less followed.
-
-Although his slow progress inevitably bored the crew, still, it offered
-that one precious ray of hope, and they became so tractable that even
-the Doctors noticed it. They laid it to the secret ingredient that Dr.
-Frank had introduced into the drinking water.
-
-The summer wore on, becoming hotter each day. By the end of the second
-month of his courtship, Blunt began to speak to her of love.
-
-She laughed. She said that she had little curiosity on the subject,
-although it was now and then mentioned by the students of antiquity.
-Assured that it was pleasurable, she said that she heard that barbarians
-also enjoyed murdering people and making them butts of jokes.
-
-Willy Lanham said, "Don't listen to what a girl _says_. Just make a grab
-for her."
-
-This suggestion was laughed to scorn.
-
-Weeks passed, the summer began to wane. Tempers again began to shorten.
-Flandeau said to Frank, "The men are worse again."
-
-"Yes, perhaps we should increase the dosage."
-
-The fruits for the Joy-Juicer grew thin on the silvery bushes, and men
-ranged far and wide, putting in supplies for the winter.
-
- ----
-
-One night, when Blunt had won at poker, all the men lay in their bunks,
-too dispirited to drink, to shoot craps, almost too miserable even for
-speech. Blunt again began talking of Catataphinaria. Drowsily Lanham
-said, "I think you're going at it the wrong way, Dick. Try some real
-rough stuff. You know--kiss her. She might like it."
-
-Before Blunt could defend his strategy, Kosalowsky sat up in his bunk.
-"Yes, for cripes sake," he said, "Move in for the kill. Or shut up about
-it. You're driving us all nuts."
-
-"Would you like to try?" Blunt suggested softly.
-
-"Sure I'll try," Kosalowsky said. He turned on the light over his bunk.
-"Give me a crack at her. I could have managed it weeks ago. All you've
-done is talk to the quail."
-
-"Yah, Dick, maybe you're using the wrong approach on this one,"
-O'Connors suggested.
-
-"It's the damn places you take her," Kosalowsky said. "Art galleries.
-Anybody ever seduce a girl in an art gallery? Symphonies. Popping around
-in her damn Hop-Hop. Can't you ever get her alone?"
-
-"She lives with ten other girls," Blunt said sulkily. "They're all home
-all the time."
-
-"Well, bring her here, then," Pane suggested. "We'll all take a powder."
-
-"Where?"
-
-There was no answer. They could not all, by day, desert the ship, and it
-was getting too chilly for the crew to hide in adjacent shrubbery. "We
-could put up a wall," Pane said suddenly, "between the bunks and the
-bar."
-
-"With what?"
-
-"I know," Banks said eagerly, "where there's a whole pile of stuff. It's
-nice thin metal, just lying there getting rusty."
-
-"I think you're premature--"
-
-"Premature!" Kosalowsky shouted. "Six months you've been chasing this
-tomato. You call that premature?"
-
-"Only four by Engrahamic time," Blunt said, insulted.
-
-"Listen," Kosalowsky said, "that wall goes up tomorrow. And you're
-smuggling her in tomorrow night. Or else," he said, glaring at Blunt,
-"after that it's every man for himself. Check?"
-
-Blunt, only slightly seen in the light from Kosalowsky's bunk, was white
-with rage. "All right, guys," he said stonily. "I've been trying to do
-right by this frail. Nothing abrupt or hillbilly. Nothing to hurt her
-delicate feelings or her fine mind. But if this is how you want
-it--Okay!"
-
- ----
-
-The next day the wall went up.
-
-Hardly a word was said as it was hammered in place. Once up, the place
-was G. I.'d thoroughly. The ash trays were washed, the floor vacuumed,
-and the lights adjusted to achieve the most tellingly seductive effect.
-Blunt went out at two, thin-lipped and silent.
-
-"The jerk," Kosalowsky said, "I think he's a lot of hot air. That's what
-_I_ think."
-
-The Colonel came in at nightfall and asked about the wall. They told him
-that it was to cut off the recreation section from the sleeping
-quarters, for the protection of those who wanted more sleep to prepare
-for the grueling winter watches.
-
-"Very good idea men," the Colonel said, and went upstairs to write
-another chapter in his book.
-
-At nine the men disappeared into their bunks. O'Connors won the
-responsible job of peering through the narrow slit in the wall. Behind
-him could be heard the labored breathing of twenty-seven distraught men.
-One man snored. "Wake up, you stupid ass," Pane told Lanham. "You'll
-wreck the show."
-
-At last the door opened and Blunt came in--with the girl.
-
-She was breath-taking. She wore, O'Connors reported, a dress cut to
-here--and her hair was piled high on her patrician head. Blunt had not
-lied. She was even prettier than the usual run of Engraham girls.
-
-"He's offering her a drink," O'Connors whispered.
-
-"She take it?"
-
-"No--she's sitting at the bar. He's having one, though. He's turning on
-the hi-fi."
-
-He did not have to tell them, since all could hear the soft music. They
-had selected a program of melodies considered sure-fire.
-
-"He's talking to her--putting his arm around her waist. Oh-oh. She
-knocked it off. She's laughing, though."
-
-In the silence they all heard her laugh. Several men moved
-uncomfortably. "He's leading her toward the couch--oh-oh--she stopped to
-look at the radar screen."
-
-It was the auxiliary radar, not the important one in the control room.
-"What's he doing?"
-
-"Telling her--he's edging her to the couch again--now she's asking about
-the Bassett Blaster. They're fooling around with the gun. He's showing
-her how it works--trying to put his hands--!"
-
-This last was lost, for there was a sudden, resounding blast. Their
-bunks, the entire ship, trembled.
-
-The meaning was clear to all. They flattened to their bunks, and waited
-tensely. They heard a sound, the sound of a foot kicking a body. A hand
-scratched tentatively along the wall.
-
-No one moved. "She killed him." O'Connors voice was no more than a
-slight whisper. "Lay low--lay low."'
-
-Then a woman's voice said, in perfect English, "All right, you men. Come
-out of there."
-
-The door was found and flung open. Catataphinaria stood in the dim
-light--still holding the Blaster. She said again, more sharply, "I said,
-Come out of there!"
-
-Clumsily, they came down from their bunks.
-
-"Now," she said, as she had them all against the wall, "call down the
-others."
-
-But this was unnecessary, for the Doctors and the Colonel were already
-descending the ladder. They turned quite white at the sight of her.
-Wordlessly, she indicated that they were to join the others. The Doctors
-found it harder to adjust to a purely military sort of emergency. Ankers
-asked clearly, "What on earth is this nonsense?"
-
-"No nonsense," the girl said. "Just do as I say. First, surrender all
-your papers."
-
-"Our papers?"
-
-"Your research. Your conclusions. Everything."
-
-Henderson said, "I'll go get it, Ma'am."
-
-"I would also like the Colonel's amusing work on the coming occupation."
-
-"I know where it is, sir," Martin said swiftly. "I'll get it."
-
-The Colonel's expression was stony. He nodded to Martin to get it, and
-it occurred to him that the girl was one of those whom he had personally
-selected as the most promising for the puppet governments. But when he
-asked about her identity, she cut him off without a word.
-
-"Then, may I ask where you learned such flawless English?"
-
-"All of us know English," she said. "It is a very stupid language."
-
-Martin and Henderson returned with the papers. Gingerly they approached
-her, handed the papers to her, and darted back to their places in the
-line. She placed the stack on the bar, leafed through it, all the while
-keeping them covered with the Blaster, and remarked on finishing, "It is
-exactly what one would expect barbarians to find interesting."
-
-Flandeau, however, remained a scientist to the last.
-
-"We find ourselves unhappily deceived," he said. "We were certain--that
-you were utterly without defenses. We were told that you did not know
-_how_ to lie, cheat, dissemble, or fight."
-
-"Only not with each other." she said. "It was, so to speak, a lost art."
-She glanced at Blunt. Several men squirmed. "But it is one that we have
-regained," she said.
-
-"And what will you do with us?" Flandeau asked.
-
-"We have decided to let you go," she said. "Now that we possess this
-weapon,"--she brandished the Blaster--"which we can copy, we think we
-can prevent more Explorations. At least this is the opinion of the
-Eleven. So I am instructed to let you leave--at once, of course."
-
-"You are most charming," said Flandeau.
-
-"At once," she repeated.
-
-"Yes, of course. Men! Prepare for blastoff!"
-
- ----
-
-The way back was tedious--the floating around, the boredom, the unending
-blackness of space--but at least it was going home. After the first
-weeks of space-sickness, things returned to near normal, and the Doctors
-conferred with the Colonel. It was decided that the best report should
-be that Engraham was uninviting, bleak, and of no interest to Earthmen.
-The reputations of all were at stake (the doctors found themselves,
-stripped of their papers, unable to recollect enough, and the Colonel
-desperately feared a court-martial) and the crew was thus advised. All
-agreed to keep their mouths shut. Thus their honorable discharges,
-medals, and life-time pensions would be safe.
-
-So, with all this decided, and Earth only a few months away, relative
-cheerfulness reigned. Only Willy Lanham continued to mope.
-
-"What's biting you?" Kosalowsky asked, one day as they lay strapped in
-adjacent bunks. "Your face is as long as this ship."
-
-"I just feel bad," Willy said. "I can feel bad if I want to, can't I?"
-
-"What the hell, we'll soon be home. We can really raise some hell,
-then."
-
-"I miss my girl," Willy blurted out.
-
-"You'll see her pretty soon."
-
-"I mean my girl on Engraham."
-
-It happened that just then several other men, bored with lying still,
-were floating past. They gripped the edges of Willy's bunk.
-
-"You mean you had," Kosalowsky said cunningly, "a girl on Engraham?"
-
-"Sure I did," said Willy defensively. "Didn't all you guys?"
-
-More and more men joined the knot of bodies around Willy's bunk. The
-atmosphere became distinctly menacing.
-
-"You mean you didn't?" Willy said. "You mean it wasn't a gag we were
-pulling on Blunt?"
-
-They were silent. One pair of floating hands neared Willy's throat.
-
-"Honest," he said. "I didn't think you were that dumb. I thought you
-were just letting Blunt make an ass of himself. I thought that--well, it
-was so easy. I even told Dick a couple of times. You just had to make a
-grab for 'em."
-
-Pane suddenly let out a harsh sound, like the cry of a wounded bull.
-
-"So who was this frail?" Kosalowsky asked heavily.
-
-"Yeah!" echoed the others.
-
-"Well, she was just a frail, I guess," Willy said. "I used to see her
-around the ship. On guard duty. I used to see her all the time. What the
-hell," he said, "You think I'm dumb or something? Why'd you think I was
-willing to stand guard all the time?"
-
-
- *END*
-
-
-
- _Transcribers note_: This etext was produced from If Worlds of Science
- Fiction February 1958. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence
- that the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HERO ***
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+<div>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 35770 ***</div>
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-.. -*- encoding: utf-8 -*-
-
-.. meta::
- :PG.Id: 35770
- :PG.Title: The Hero
- :PG.Released: 2011-04-04
- :PG.Rights: Public Domain
- :PG.Producer: Frank van Drogen
- :PG.Producer: Greg Weeks
- :PG.Producer: the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
- :DC.Creator: Elaine Wilber
- :DC.Title: The Hero
- :DC.Language: en
- :DC.Created: 1958
- :coverpage: images/cover.jpg
-
-===================
- THE HERO
-===================
-
-.. _pg-header:
-
-.. container::
- :class: pgheader
-
- .. style:: paragraph
- :class: noindent
-
- This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
- almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
- re-use it under the terms of the `Project Gutenberg License`_
- included with this eBook or online at
- http://www.gutenberg.org/license.
-
-
-
- |
-
- .. _pg-machine-header:
-
- .. container::
-
- Title: The Hero
-
- Author: Elaine Wilber
-
- Release Date: April 04, 2011 [EBook #35770]
-
- Language: English
-
- Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
- |
-
- .. _pg-start-line:
-
- \*\*\* START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HERO \*\*\*
-
- |
- |
- |
- |
-
- .. _pg-produced-by:
-
- .. container::
-
- Produced by Frank van Drogen, Greg Weeks, and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net.
-
- |
-
-
-
-
-.. role:: xl
- :class: x-large
-
-.. role:: small-caps
- :class: small-caps
-
-.. class:: center
-
-
-.. image:: images/cover.jpg
- :align: center
-
-..
-
-
-
- | :xl:`THE HERO`
- |
- | BY ELAINE WILBER
- |
- | *Willy was undoubtedly a hero. The difficulty lies in deciding which side he was on....*
-
-
-.. figure:: images/im1.png
- :align: center
-
- *Illustrated by Paul Orban*
-
-
-Two months after the
-landing, Ship UXB-69311 was
-rigged out with most things needed
-to make life bearable, if not interesting,
-for the crew. Perched on the
-manicured, blue-green sod of the
-planet Engraham, its inner parts
-were transformed and refitted for
-the many months of the Exploration.
-No effort and no flight of
-imagination had been spared to
-make the ship resemble more a
-country club than a barracks. With
-the permission of Colonel Mondrain,
-the crew's bunkroom had
-been completely rearranged, and a
-segment thereof made into a quietly
-elegant bar. Plans for this eventual
-rejuvenation had been fomenting
-throughout the very tiresome
-and very monotonous journey.
-
-When they first landed, the natives
-fled, and thus it was easy to
-liberate furnishings from the adjacent village.
-When the inhabitants
-returned, after the purposes of the
-visiting Earthman were acknowledged
-to be harmless, they proved
-to be too courteous to carp about a
-few missing articles.
-
-The chairs, of a very advanced
-design and most comfortable, were
-made of a light and durable metal
-alloy thus far unknown to Earth.
-The bar (which was probably not
-its purpose on Engraham, no one
-knew or cared what its function had
-been) was of a design so futuristic
-that it would have turned a modern
-artist mad. The utensils, also
-liberated, were unbelievably delicate,
-yet strong and easy to wash.
-At first, since the Earth had not
-intended the Exploration to resemble
-the type that Texas-stationed
-servicemen like to run in Matamoros,
-there was nothing to drink
-in the utensils. But hardly six weeks
-had passed before the first hero of
-the Exploration, a man named
-O'Connors, discovered a palatable
-fruit growing on nearby bushes. By
-means of a system of improvised
-pipes (also liberated) it was no
-time at all before tasty beverages,
-somewhat strident but quite effective,
-were being run off and consumed
-in quantities. The machine
-known as O'Connors Joy-Juicer was
-concealed behind the bar, and all
-that was ever seen on the bar when
-Colonel Mondrain or the Doctors
-were around was an innocuous fruit
-juice.
-
-The Earth Command had
-stocked the ship with reading material,
-most of it of a disgustingly educational
-nature, in photostatic
-cards: and the second hero of the
-Exploration was a man named
-Kosalowsky, who discovered in the
-psychology sections the works of
-Freud and Krafft-Ebing. After this
-discovery, a few interesting discussions
-arose.
-
-After these changes had been
-made, there was very little to do.
-
-The Earth Command had assumed
-that the natives of Engraham
-would resent the Explorations
-(most planets did), and so had sent
-along the crew of thirty men for
-protection. All had labored mightily
-to become part of this special
-crew, chosen for endurance and
-known war-like qualities. For once
-they got back to Earth, all were
-slated to be mustered out of service
-immediately, decorated to the ears,
-and awarded full, life-time pensions.
-Many already had contracts
-to appear on television and one
-man, Blunt, hinted at a long term
-Hollywood contract.
-
-But once they got there, there
-was little to do after all. A guard
-was posted; instruments were
-checked; and, although the necessity
-seemed slight, the ship was kept
-primed for instantaneous emergency
-take-off. On the day corresponding
-to Earth's Saturday, the
-ship was G. I.'d from stem to stern.
-The maintenance crew made sure
-that no parts deteriorated or got
-liberated by enterprising natives.
-But the natives were not an inventive
-race. It was discovered by the
-Doctors (Anker, Frank, Pelham
-and Flandeau) that the natives
-literally did not know how to steal.
-They were backward. Dr. Flandeau,
-who was making great strides
-with the language, reported that
-there was some evidence that the
-Engrahamites had once possessed
-this skill, along with murder, mayhem,
-bad faith, and politics, but
-had lost it, through a deterioration
-of the species.
-
-Thus, once the ship had been
-transformed into a place worthy of
-human dwelling, and the beverage
-question had been solved, and utter,
-imbecilic boredom circumvented by
-the timely discoveries of Freud and
-Krafft-Ebing, the men found time
-hanging heavily on their hands;
-and the more the doctors discovered
-about the Engrahamites, the
-more dismal the situation became.
-The doctors, growing more and
-more fascinated by their tasks, left
-the ship bright and early each day,
-returning around nightfall to reduce
-their growing stacks of data
-to points of Earthly relevance. The
-Colonel was also out most of the
-time. He paid many social calls on
-the natives, who, being courteous,
-received him, and was often returned
-at night in a chauffeured
-native Hop-Hop. Life in the bunkroom
-became a sullen round of
-poker, reading of Krafft-Ebing, and
-gab: and Earth currency changed
-hands daily in the never-ending
-crap game.
-
-For there was one great lack in
-their lives. This lack, and the inability
-to do anything about it, absorbed
-many hours of conversation.
-At first, complaints only occurred at
-intervals; but as weeks passed, the
-lamentations became so fervent, so
-constant, and so heart-rending, that
-Dr. Flandeau observed to Dr. Frank
-that more stirring passages had not
-been made since the Jeremiad. For
-Dr. Flandeau, although aging, was
-in his off hours a poet, and a
-Frenchman always.
-
-Dr. Frank said, "Yes, well, poor
-bastards."
-
-At first, nostalgically, the crew
-harked back to happier times on
-Earth. Soon not one young lady of
-their collective acquaintance had
-escaped the most minute analysis.
-They were young men—the oldest,
-Blunt, was only twenty-six—and
-several of them had married young,
-greatly limiting their activities so
-that even their cumulative memories
-could not last forever. After
-several weeks, repetition began to
-set in. Once all successes had been
-lovingly remembered, down to the
-last, exquisite detail, they began recalling
-their failures. The master
-strategist, the unofficial referee of
-these seminars, was Dick Blunt.
-
-"Now where you went wrong
-there," he would tell a fledgling
-reporting complete zero with a
-YWCA resident, "was in making
-her feel that you were interested.
-Your line with a girl like that
-should be one of charity. Pure
-charity. You impress on her that
-you're doing her a terrific favor.
-You offer to bring to her dull life
-romance, adventure, tenderness."
-
-"I couldn't even get my hands
-on her," complained the reproved
-failure, Herbert Banks.
-
-"I've always found that type the
-easiest ones of all," Blunt said indifferently.
-"Dull, of course."
-
-The testiness, the self-pity, the
-shortness of temper and the near-riots
-over stolen packages of cigarettes,
-were not improved after the
-Doctors, having surveyed the situation
-thoroughly, decided that it
-would do no harm to let the men of
-the crew go out on Liberty.
-
-Fraternizing with natives was, of
-course, strictly forbidden. They
-were not to drink off premises.
-(Nor on, for that matter.) They
-were exhorted not to steal, not to
-engage in fights.
-
-Still, they could walk around,
-take pictures of the strange pink
-houses and the dazzling cities. They
-could watch a covey of children
-swim in the municipal pools. They
-could look at the fountains, the so-called
-"miraculous fountains of
-Engraham", or climb the strange,
-glassy mountains. The natives, although
-shy of them, were most polite,
-and some smiled enchantingly—especially
-the women.
-
-----
-
-This was the worst rub of
-all: there were women, and
-they were gorgeous. A little smaller
-than most Earth women, with
-bright eyes, and high, arched eyebrows,
-looking forever as if they
-had heard the most priceless joke.
-Their faces conformed to the most
-rigid standards of Caucasian
-beauty. Their legs, so delicate, so
-tapering, so fantastically small of
-ankle, were breath-taking. Their
-clothes, which would have driven a
-Parisian designer to suicide, were
-draped carelessly over the most exquisite
-figures. True, they were a
-little deficient in one department,
-and this was explained, before they
-were granted liberty, by Dr. Flandeau.
-The women of Engraham, he
-said, did not bear children.
-
-This announcement was not received
-with special gloom, for until
-then, none of the crew had seen an
-Engrahamite woman. But Willy
-Lanham, a dark-haired, skinny boy
-from Tennessee, asked, unhappily,
-"Don't they even go in for games
-or nothin'?"
-
-Flandeau understood instantly.
-He shook his head sadly. "I should
-think not. It has been a long time
-since they have observed the normal
-functions. The women are
-mainly for decoration, although it
-is said that some are also created
-for brains. They are a most strange
-people."
-
-After this—granted these agonizing
-liberties, and able to see that
-which was biologically unattainable—the
-crew became so demoralized
-that not even Kosalowsky's discovery
-of the works of Wilhelm
-Reik relieved the deep gloom.
-
-However, they had reckoned
-without the superior genius of Dick
-Blunt. Blunt received Flandeau's
-news as unhappily as the others,
-and, like the rest, was made miserable
-by the sight of the glorious
-damozels. But he was a reasonable
-man and he put his reasoning powers
-to work. Soon he alone was
-cheerful. He went around with the
-absorbed, other-world look of a
-physicist grappling with a problem
-in ionospheric mathematics without
-the use of an IBM calculator.
-One day he went on Liberty alone.
-He did not return until the fall of
-night, and when he came in his
-elation was so immoderate that the
-others thought there must be bars
-on Engraham after all.
-
-"I have found the answer to our
-question," he said.
-
-No one needed to ask what question.
-O'Connors hurried to pour
-Blunt a drink.
-
-"I have spent the day pursuing
-this answer logically," said Blunt.
-"I have done what any thoughtful
-man would do. I have read up on
-it."
-
-"How?" cried Henderson.
-
-"At the library."
-
-Blunt then described his day:
-finding his way to the library by
-means of pantomime; and finding
-at last, that file of photographs—photographs
-of an utterly self-explanatory
-nature. And these he
-pulled from his pocket, for ignoring
-all discipline, he had stolen
-them.
-
-The pictures passed from hand
-to hand. O'Connors passed them
-on to Pane, and suddenly felt the
-need to open the window behind
-him. It was Willy Lanham, the
-boy from Tennessee, who voiced
-those exultant words that rose to
-the throats of all:
-
-He said, "Hey! They're made
-just like the Earth girls."
-
-The conversation, at this intensely
-interesting point, was cut short
-by the arrival of the Colonel. He
-alighted from the native Hop-Hop—waved
-cheerily to its driver, and
-began coming up. The bottle and
-glasses vanished, and Kosalowsky
-began to read aloud from a book
-especially reserved for these occasions.
-The men maintained looks
-of studious interest as the officer
-went through. He went up the ladder
-to his own quarters, there to
-write in his growing volume, THE
-COMING OCCUPATION AND
-GOVERNMENT OF ENGRAHAM.
-They listened until his door
-clicked.
-
-The conversation was resumed
-in more subdued tones.
-
-"Do you think," said Pane shakily,
-"They still *could*?"
-
-"Not a question of it," Blunt
-said. "These pictures prove it. It's
-what you might call a lost art. Once
-upon a time, as with all the fortunate
-parts of the galaxy, this art
-was known to the Engrahamites.
-Through some terrific foul-up, they
-lost it. Probably a combination of
-the science of incubation, and the
-reign of some ghastly square, like
-Queen Victoria. Thus were the
-girls of Engraham deprived of the
-pleasures of love."
-
-"The men, too," said Willy. All
-glared at him reproachfully. To
-care about the happiness of the
-Engrahamite men was thought not
-quite patriotic.
-
-"Gradually," Blunt went on,
-"they must have begun to lose
-interest. Probably there was some
-taboo. In the end they probably all
-thought, oh, to hell with it, and began
-serving on committees."
-
-A long sigh went up.
-
-"It is for us," Blunt said softly,
-treasuring each word, "to restore
-these unhappy maidens to their
-original human rights.
-
-"But it isn't going to be easy,"
-Blunt went on. His voice dropped
-even lower. "Think what would
-happen if it went sour. Those Doctors
-would get wind of it. We'd be
-stuck in the Ship for the rest of
-the Exploration."
-
-There was a sober pause. Finally
-Banks cleared his throat and said,
-"Well, how do you think it should
-be handled, Blunt?"
-
-"Well, every beachhead needs an
-invasion," Blunt said, casually holding
-out his glass. O'Connors leapt
-to fill it. "One guy has got to lay
-the groundwork. Let him enlighten
-one quail. Explain things to her."
-He took a long, leisurely drink, and
-sighed. "This quail will rush
-around telling the others. Pretty
-soon there'll be so many hanging
-around the ship that—"
-
-There was a general rush for
-cooling beverages.
-
-"Right," someone said, when the
-faculty of speech was recovered.
-
-"And necessarily," said Blunt,
-"this has to be the guy with the
-most savvy. The one who knows the
-score. The one most likely to succeed.
-Check?"
-
-All knew what this was leading
-up to. Martin said unhappily,
-"Check, Blunt, You're our boy."
-
-----
-
-Blunt was scheduled to stand
-guard the next day, but Willy Lanham,
-eager to assist the cause, volunteered
-to take over for him. The
-hours seemed to creep by. His air
-was swaggering and cool when he
-returned, and all gathered round
-with eager curiosity—all but Lanham,
-who had not recovered from
-standing guard.
-
-Blunt sauntered to the bar, accepted
-a drink, sipped it, lighted a
-cigarette, and took a long, pensive
-drag. Finally he said reminiscently,
-"What a doll!"
-
-Pane, never a subtle man, cried
-in anguish, "Well, how'd you make
-out?"
-
-Blunt smiled smugly. He began
-his recital. He was walking along
-the street and he met this gorgeous
-creature. A full description followed
-(broken by the arrival of
-the Colonel and two paragraphs of
-the DECLINE AND FALL) making
-it clear that this was the dish
-of dishes, the most beautiful of the
-beautiful, the most charming, and
-the most intelligent. She allowed
-herself to be addressed in Blunt's
-few words of Engrahamic and,
-smiling ever patiently, sat with him
-for several hours. Their talk took
-place in a secluded bower, in one
-of the many parks. She was agreeable
-and charmed and promised to
-see him again. He even managed,
-through terrific feats of pantomime,
-to impress on her the need of secrecy
-in future meetings.
-
-"That was all?" someone said,
-when he finished.
-
-"For the first meeting, I think I
-did wonders," said Blunt. "After
-all, sex hasn't been known here
-since a time corresponding to our
-Stone Age."
-
-Later, when the nightly poker
-game was beginning, Willy Lanham
-said, "Why didn't you just
-make a grab for her?"
-
-"That's the hill-billy approach,"
-Blunt said disdainfully. "These girls
-are civilized—very, very civilized.
-It's important not to shock them."
-
-----
-
-Blunt's next gambit was to
-set about learning the language.
-For this he went not to
-Flandeau, who best knew it, but to
-Ankers, who was a pure scientist
-in every sense of the word, and not
-so likely to suspect his motives. The
-girl proved very cultured. She took
-him to art galleries, to symphonies,
-and mountain climbing, for scrambling
-up and down the glassy hills
-was a favorite Engrahamic sport.
-As he advanced in the language,
-he learned that her name was Catataphinaria,
-which meant "she will
-attain relative wisdom". He found
-that she worked for the Eleven
-who, while not rulers, offered general
-suggestions which the populace
-more or less followed.
-
-Although his slow progress inevitably
-bored the crew, still, it offered
-that one precious ray of hope,
-and they became so tractable that
-even the Doctors noticed it. They
-laid it to the secret ingredient that
-Dr. Frank had introduced into the
-drinking water.
-
-The summer wore on, becoming
-hotter each day. By the end of the
-second month of his courtship,
-Blunt began to speak to her of love.
-
-She laughed. She said that she
-had little curiosity on the subject,
-although it was now and then
-mentioned by the students of antiquity.
-Assured that it was pleasurable,
-she said that she heard that
-barbarians also enjoyed murdering
-people and making them butts of
-jokes.
-
-Willy Lanham said, "Don't listen
-to what a girl *says*. Just make a
-grab for her."
-
-This suggestion was laughed to
-scorn.
-
-Weeks passed, the summer began
-to wane. Tempers again began
-to shorten. Flandeau said to Frank,
-"The men are worse again."
-
-"Yes, perhaps we should increase
-the dosage."
-
-The fruits for the Joy-Juicer
-grew thin on the silvery bushes, and
-men ranged far and wide, putting
-in supplies for the winter.
-
-----
-
-One night, when Blunt had won
-at poker, all the men lay in their
-bunks, too dispirited to drink, to
-shoot craps, almost too miserable
-even for speech. Blunt again began
-talking of Catataphinaria. Drowsily
-Lanham said, "I think you're going
-at it the wrong way, Dick. Try
-some real rough stuff. You know—kiss
-her. She might like it."
-
-Before Blunt could defend his
-strategy, Kosalowsky sat up in his
-bunk. "Yes, for cripes sake," he
-said, "Move in for the kill. Or shut
-up about it. You're driving us all
-nuts."
-
-"Would you like to try?" Blunt
-suggested softly.
-
-"Sure I'll try," Kosalowsky said.
-He turned on the light over his
-bunk. "Give me a crack at her. I
-could have managed it weeks ago.
-All you've done is talk to the
-quail."
-
-"Yah, Dick, maybe you're using
-the wrong approach on this one,"
-O'Connors suggested.
-
-"It's the damn places you take
-her," Kosalowsky said. "Art galleries.
-Anybody ever seduce a girl
-in an art gallery? Symphonies.
-Popping around in her damn Hop-Hop.
-Can't you ever get her
-alone?"
-
-"She lives with ten other girls,"
-Blunt said sulkily. "They're all
-home all the time."
-
-"Well, bring her here, then,"
-Pane suggested. "We'll all take a
-powder."
-
-"Where?"
-
-There was no answer. They
-could not all, by day, desert the
-ship, and it was getting too chilly
-for the crew to hide in adjacent
-shrubbery. "We could put up a
-wall," Pane said suddenly, "between
-the bunks and the bar."
-
-"With what?"
-
-"I know," Banks said eagerly,
-"where there's a whole pile of stuff.
-It's nice thin metal, just lying there
-getting rusty."
-
-"I think you're premature—"
-
-"Premature!" Kosalowsky shouted.
-"Six months you've been chasing
-this tomato. You call that premature?"
-
-"Only four by Engrahamic
-time," Blunt said, insulted.
-
-"Listen," Kosalowsky said, "that
-wall goes up tomorrow. And you're
-smuggling her in tomorrow night.
-Or else," he said, glaring at Blunt,
-"after that it's every man for himself.
-Check?"
-
-Blunt, only slightly seen in the
-light from Kosalowsky's bunk, was
-white with rage. "All right, guys,"
-he said stonily. "I've been trying to
-do right by this frail. Nothing
-abrupt or hillbilly. Nothing to hurt
-her delicate feelings or her fine
-mind. But if this is how you want
-it—Okay!"
-
-----
-
-The next day the wall went up.
-
-Hardly a word was said as it
-was hammered in place. Once up,
-the place was G. I.'d thoroughly.
-The ash trays were washed, the
-floor vacuumed, and the lights adjusted
-to achieve the most tellingly
-seductive effect. Blunt went out at
-two, thin-lipped and silent.
-
-"The jerk," Kosalowsky said, "I
-think he's a lot of hot air. That's
-what *I* think."
-
-The Colonel came in at nightfall
-and asked about the wall. They
-told him that it was to cut off the
-recreation section from the sleeping
-quarters, for the protection of those
-who wanted more sleep to prepare
-for the grueling winter watches.
-
-"Very good idea men," the
-Colonel said, and went upstairs to
-write another chapter in his book.
-
-At nine the men disappeared into
-their bunks. O'Connors won the
-responsible job of peering through
-the narrow slit in the wall. Behind
-him could be heard the labored
-breathing of twenty-seven distraught
-men. One man snored.
-"Wake up, you stupid ass," Pane
-told Lanham. "You'll wreck the
-show."
-
-At last the door opened and
-Blunt came in—with the girl.
-
-She was breath-taking. She wore,
-O'Connors reported, a dress cut to
-here—and her hair was piled high
-on her patrician head. Blunt had
-not lied. She was even prettier than
-the usual run of Engraham girls.
-
-"He's offering her a drink,"
-O'Connors whispered.
-
-"She take it?"
-
-"No—she's sitting at the bar.
-He's having one, though. He's turning
-on the hi-fi."
-
-He did not have to tell them,
-since all could hear the soft music.
-They had selected a program of
-melodies considered sure-fire.
-
-"He's talking to her—putting his
-arm around her waist. Oh-oh. She
-knocked it off. She's laughing,
-though."
-
-In the silence they all heard her
-laugh. Several men moved uncomfortably.
-"He's leading her toward
-the couch—oh-oh—she stopped to
-look at the radar screen."
-
-It was the auxiliary radar, not
-the important one in the control
-room. "What's he doing?"
-
-"Telling her—he's edging her to
-the couch again—now she's asking
-about the Bassett Blaster. They're
-fooling around with the gun. He's
-showing her how it works—trying
-to put his hands—!"
-
-This last was lost, for there was
-a sudden, resounding blast. Their
-bunks, the entire ship, trembled.
-
-The meaning was clear to all.
-They flattened to their bunks, and
-waited tensely. They heard a sound,
-the sound of a foot kicking a body.
-A hand scratched tentatively
-along the wall.
-
-No one moved. "She killed him."
-O'Connors voice was no more than
-a slight whisper. "Lay low—lay
-low."'
-
-Then a woman's voice said, in
-perfect English, "All right, you
-men. Come out of there."
-
-The door was found and flung
-open. Catataphinaria stood in the
-dim light—still holding the Blaster.
-She said again, more sharply, "I
-said, Come out of there!"
-
-Clumsily, they came down from
-their bunks.
-
-"Now," she said, as she had
-them all against the wall, "call
-down the others."
-
-But this was unnecessary, for the
-Doctors and the Colonel were already
-descending the ladder. They
-turned quite white at the sight of
-her. Wordlessly, she indicated that
-they were to join the others. The
-Doctors found it harder to adjust
-to a purely military sort of emergency.
-Ankers asked clearly, "What
-on earth is this nonsense?"
-
-"No nonsense," the girl said.
-"Just do as I say. First, surrender
-all your papers."
-
-"Our papers?"
-
-"Your research. Your conclusions.
-Everything."
-
-Henderson said, "I'll go get it,
-Ma'am."
-
-"I would also like the Colonel's
-amusing work on the coming occupation."
-
-"I know where it is, sir," Martin
-said swiftly. "I'll get it."
-
-The Colonel's expression was
-stony. He nodded to Martin to get
-it, and it occurred to him that the
-girl was one of those whom he had
-personally selected as the most
-promising for the puppet governments.
-But when he asked about her
-identity, she cut him off without a
-word.
-
-"Then, may I ask where you
-learned such flawless English?"
-
-"All of us know English," she
-said. "It is a very stupid language."
-
-Martin and Henderson returned
-with the papers. Gingerly they approached
-her, handed the papers to
-her, and darted back to their places
-in the line. She placed the stack on
-the bar, leafed through it, all the
-while keeping them covered with
-the Blaster, and remarked on finishing,
-"It is exactly what one
-would expect barbarians to find
-interesting."
-
-Flandeau, however, remained a
-scientist to the last.
-
-"We find ourselves unhappily deceived,"
-he said. "We were certain—that
-you were utterly without defenses.
-We were told that you did
-not know *how* to lie, cheat, dissemble,
-or fight."
-
-"Only not with each other." she
-said. "It was, so to speak, a lost
-art." She glanced at Blunt. Several
-men squirmed. "But it is one that
-we have regained," she said.
-
-"And what will you do with us?"
-Flandeau asked.
-
-"We have decided to let you go,"
-she said. "Now that we possess this
-weapon,"—she brandished the
-Blaster—"which we can copy, we
-think we can prevent more Explorations.
-At least this is the opinion
-of the Eleven. So I am instructed
-to let you leave—at once,
-of course."
-
-"You are most charming," said
-Flandeau.
-
-"At once," she repeated.
-
-"Yes, of course. Men! Prepare
-for blastoff!"
-
-----
-
-The way back was tedious—the
-floating around, the
-boredom, the unending blackness
-of space—but at least it was going
-home. After the first weeks of
-space-sickness, things returned to
-near normal, and the Doctors conferred
-with the Colonel. It was decided
-that the best report should
-be that Engraham was uninviting,
-bleak, and of no interest to Earthmen.
-The reputations of all were
-at stake (the doctors found themselves,
-stripped of their papers,
-unable to recollect enough, and the
-Colonel desperately feared a court-martial)
-and the crew was thus
-advised. All agreed to keep their
-mouths shut. Thus their honorable
-discharges, medals, and life-time
-pensions would be safe.
-
-So, with all this decided, and
-Earth only a few months away,
-relative cheerfulness reigned. Only
-Willy Lanham continued to mope.
-
-"What's biting you?" Kosalowsky
-asked, one day as they lay strapped
-in adjacent bunks. "Your face is
-as long as this ship."
-
-"I just feel bad," Willy said. "I
-can feel bad if I want to, can't I?"
-
-"What the hell, we'll soon be
-home. We can really raise some
-hell, then."
-
-"I miss my girl," Willy blurted
-out.
-
-"You'll see her pretty soon."
-
-"I mean my girl on Engraham."
-
-It happened that just then several
-other men, bored with lying
-still, were floating past. They
-gripped the edges of Willy's bunk.
-
-"You mean you had," Kosalowsky
-said cunningly, "a girl on Engraham?"
-
-"Sure I did," said Willy defensively.
-"Didn't all you guys?"
-
-More and more men joined the
-knot of bodies around Willy's bunk.
-The atmosphere became distinctly
-menacing.
-
-"You mean you didn't?" Willy
-said. "You mean it wasn't a gag we
-were pulling on Blunt?"
-
-They were silent. One pair of
-floating hands neared Willy's
-throat.
-
-"Honest," he said. "I didn't
-think you were that dumb. I
-thought you were just letting Blunt
-make an ass of himself. I thought
-that—well, it was so easy. I even
-told Dick a couple of times. You
-just had to make a grab for 'em."
-
-Pane suddenly let out a harsh
-sound, like the cry of a wounded
-bull.
-
-"So who was this frail?" Kosalowsky
-asked heavily.
-
-"Yeah!" echoed the others.
-
-"Well, she was just a frail, I
-guess," Willy said. "I used to see
-her around the ship. On guard
-duty. I used to see her all the time.
-What the hell," he said, "You think
-I'm dumb or something? Why'd
-you think I was willing to stand
-guard all the time?"
-
-.. class:: center
-
- **END**
-
-
- | :small-caps:`Transcribers note`: This etext was produced from If Worlds of Science Fiction February 1958. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.
-
-|
-|
-|
-|
-|
-
-.. _pg_end_line:
-
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- THE HERO
-
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost
-no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it
-under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this
-eBook or online at http://www.gutenberg.org/license.
-
-Title: The Hero
-
-Author: Elaine Wilber
-
-Release Date: April 04, 2011 [EBook #35770]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: US-ASCII
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HERO ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by Frank van Drogen, Greg Weeks, and the Online Distributed
-Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
- THE HERO
-
- BY ELAINE WILBER
-
- _Willy was undoubtedly a hero. The difficulty lies in deciding
- which side he was on...._
-
-
-[Illustration: __Illustrated by Paul Orban__]
-
-
-Two months after the landing, Ship UXB-69311 was rigged out with most
-things needed to make life bearable, if not interesting, for the crew.
-Perched on the manicured, blue-green sod of the planet Engraham, its
-inner parts were transformed and refitted for the many months of the
-Exploration. No effort and no flight of imagination had been spared to
-make the ship resemble more a country club than a barracks. With the
-permission of Colonel Mondrain, the crew's bunkroom had been completely
-rearranged, and a segment thereof made into a quietly elegant bar. Plans
-for this eventual rejuvenation had been fomenting throughout the very
-tiresome and very monotonous journey.
-
-When they first landed, the natives fled, and thus it was easy to
-liberate furnishings from the adjacent village. When the inhabitants
-returned, after the purposes of the visiting Earthman were acknowledged
-to be harmless, they proved to be too courteous to carp about a few
-missing articles.
-
-The chairs, of a very advanced design and most comfortable, were made of
-a light and durable metal alloy thus far unknown to Earth. The bar
-(which was probably not its purpose on Engraham, no one knew or cared
-what its function had been) was of a design so futuristic that it would
-have turned a modern artist mad. The utensils, also liberated, were
-unbelievably delicate, yet strong and easy to wash. At first, since the
-Earth had not intended the Exploration to resemble the type that
-Texas-stationed servicemen like to run in Matamoros, there was nothing
-to drink in the utensils. But hardly six weeks had passed before the
-first hero of the Exploration, a man named O'Connors, discovered a
-palatable fruit growing on nearby bushes. By means of a system of
-improvised pipes (also liberated) it was no time at all before tasty
-beverages, somewhat strident but quite effective, were being run off and
-consumed in quantities. The machine known as O'Connors Joy-Juicer was
-concealed behind the bar, and all that was ever seen on the bar when
-Colonel Mondrain or the Doctors were around was an innocuous fruit
-juice.
-
-The Earth Command had stocked the ship with reading material, most of it
-of a disgustingly educational nature, in photostatic cards: and the
-second hero of the Exploration was a man named Kosalowsky, who
-discovered in the psychology sections the works of Freud and
-Krafft-Ebing. After this discovery, a few interesting discussions arose.
-
-After these changes had been made, there was very little to do.
-
-The Earth Command had assumed that the natives of Engraham would resent
-the Explorations (most planets did), and so had sent along the crew of
-thirty men for protection. All had labored mightily to become part of
-this special crew, chosen for endurance and known war-like qualities.
-For once they got back to Earth, all were slated to be mustered out of
-service immediately, decorated to the ears, and awarded full, life-time
-pensions. Many already had contracts to appear on television and one
-man, Blunt, hinted at a long term Hollywood contract.
-
-But once they got there, there was little to do after all. A guard was
-posted; instruments were checked; and, although the necessity seemed
-slight, the ship was kept primed for instantaneous emergency take-off.
-On the day corresponding to Earth's Saturday, the ship was G. I.'d from
-stem to stern. The maintenance crew made sure that no parts deteriorated
-or got liberated by enterprising natives. But the natives were not an
-inventive race. It was discovered by the Doctors (Anker, Frank, Pelham
-and Flandeau) that the natives literally did not know how to steal. They
-were backward. Dr. Flandeau, who was making great strides with the
-language, reported that there was some evidence that the Engrahamites
-had once possessed this skill, along with murder, mayhem, bad faith, and
-politics, but had lost it, through a deterioration of the species.
-
-Thus, once the ship had been transformed into a place worthy of human
-dwelling, and the beverage question had been solved, and utter,
-imbecilic boredom circumvented by the timely discoveries of Freud and
-Krafft-Ebing, the men found time hanging heavily on their hands; and the
-more the doctors discovered about the Engrahamites, the more dismal the
-situation became. The doctors, growing more and more fascinated by their
-tasks, left the ship bright and early each day, returning around
-nightfall to reduce their growing stacks of data to points of Earthly
-relevance. The Colonel was also out most of the time. He paid many
-social calls on the natives, who, being courteous, received him, and was
-often returned at night in a chauffeured native Hop-Hop. Life in the
-bunkroom became a sullen round of poker, reading of Krafft-Ebing, and
-gab: and Earth currency changed hands daily in the never-ending crap
-game.
-
-For there was one great lack in their lives. This lack, and the
-inability to do anything about it, absorbed many hours of conversation.
-At first, complaints only occurred at intervals; but as weeks passed,
-the lamentations became so fervent, so constant, and so heart-rending,
-that Dr. Flandeau observed to Dr. Frank that more stirring passages had
-not been made since the Jeremiad. For Dr. Flandeau, although aging, was
-in his off hours a poet, and a Frenchman always.
-
-Dr. Frank said, "Yes, well, poor bastards."
-
-At first, nostalgically, the crew harked back to happier times on Earth.
-Soon not one young lady of their collective acquaintance had escaped the
-most minute analysis. They were young men--the oldest, Blunt, was only
-twenty-six--and several of them had married young, greatly limiting
-their activities so that even their cumulative memories could not last
-forever. After several weeks, repetition began to set in. Once all
-successes had been lovingly remembered, down to the last, exquisite
-detail, they began recalling their failures. The master strategist, the
-unofficial referee of these seminars, was Dick Blunt.
-
-"Now where you went wrong there," he would tell a fledgling reporting
-complete zero with a YWCA resident, "was in making her feel that you
-were interested. Your line with a girl like that should be one of
-charity. Pure charity. You impress on her that you're doing her a
-terrific favor. You offer to bring to her dull life romance, adventure,
-tenderness."
-
-"I couldn't even get my hands on her," complained the reproved failure,
-Herbert Banks.
-
-"I've always found that type the easiest ones of all," Blunt said
-indifferently. "Dull, of course."
-
-The testiness, the self-pity, the shortness of temper and the near-riots
-over stolen packages of cigarettes, were not improved after the Doctors,
-having surveyed the situation thoroughly, decided that it would do no
-harm to let the men of the crew go out on Liberty.
-
-Fraternizing with natives was, of course, strictly forbidden. They were
-not to drink off premises. (Nor on, for that matter.) They were exhorted
-not to steal, not to engage in fights.
-
-Still, they could walk around, take pictures of the strange pink houses
-and the dazzling cities. They could watch a covey of children swim in
-the municipal pools. They could look at the fountains, the so-called
-"miraculous fountains of Engraham", or climb the strange, glassy
-mountains. The natives, although shy of them, were most polite, and some
-smiled enchantingly--especially the women.
-
- ----
-
-This was the worst rub of all: there were women, and they were gorgeous.
-A little smaller than most Earth women, with bright eyes, and high,
-arched eyebrows, looking forever as if they had heard the most priceless
-joke. Their faces conformed to the most rigid standards of Caucasian
-beauty. Their legs, so delicate, so tapering, so fantastically small of
-ankle, were breath-taking. Their clothes, which would have driven a
-Parisian designer to suicide, were draped carelessly over the most
-exquisite figures. True, they were a little deficient in one department,
-and this was explained, before they were granted liberty, by Dr.
-Flandeau. The women of Engraham, he said, did not bear children.
-
-This announcement was not received with special gloom, for until then,
-none of the crew had seen an Engrahamite woman. But Willy Lanham, a
-dark-haired, skinny boy from Tennessee, asked, unhappily, "Don't they
-even go in for games or nothin'?"
-
-Flandeau understood instantly. He shook his head sadly. "I should think
-not. It has been a long time since they have observed the normal
-functions. The women are mainly for decoration, although it is said that
-some are also created for brains. They are a most strange people."
-
-After this--granted these agonizing liberties, and able to see that
-which was biologically unattainable--the crew became so demoralized that
-not even Kosalowsky's discovery of the works of Wilhelm Reik relieved
-the deep gloom.
-
-However, they had reckoned without the superior genius of Dick Blunt.
-Blunt received Flandeau's news as unhappily as the others, and, like the
-rest, was made miserable by the sight of the glorious damozels. But he
-was a reasonable man and he put his reasoning powers to work. Soon he
-alone was cheerful. He went around with the absorbed, other-world look
-of a physicist grappling with a problem in ionospheric mathematics
-without the use of an IBM calculator. One day he went on Liberty alone.
-He did not return until the fall of night, and when he came in his
-elation was so immoderate that the others thought there must be bars on
-Engraham after all.
-
-"I have found the answer to our question," he said.
-
-No one needed to ask what question. O'Connors hurried to pour Blunt a
-drink.
-
-"I have spent the day pursuing this answer logically," said Blunt. "I
-have done what any thoughtful man would do. I have read up on it."
-
-"How?" cried Henderson.
-
-"At the library."
-
-Blunt then described his day: finding his way to the library by means of
-pantomime; and finding at last, that file of photographs--photographs of
-an utterly self-explanatory nature. And these he pulled from his pocket,
-for ignoring all discipline, he had stolen them.
-
-The pictures passed from hand to hand. O'Connors passed them on to Pane,
-and suddenly felt the need to open the window behind him. It was Willy
-Lanham, the boy from Tennessee, who voiced those exultant words that
-rose to the throats of all:
-
-He said, "Hey! They're made just like the Earth girls."
-
-The conversation, at this intensely interesting point, was cut short by
-the arrival of the Colonel. He alighted from the native Hop-Hop--waved
-cheerily to its driver, and began coming up. The bottle and glasses
-vanished, and Kosalowsky began to read aloud from a book especially
-reserved for these occasions. The men maintained looks of studious
-interest as the officer went through. He went up the ladder to his own
-quarters, there to write in his growing volume, THE COMING OCCUPATION
-AND GOVERNMENT OF ENGRAHAM. They listened until his door clicked.
-
-The conversation was resumed in more subdued tones.
-
-"Do you think," said Pane shakily, "They still _could_?"
-
-"Not a question of it," Blunt said. "These pictures prove it. It's what
-you might call a lost art. Once upon a time, as with all the fortunate
-parts of the galaxy, this art was known to the Engrahamites. Through
-some terrific foul-up, they lost it. Probably a combination of the
-science of incubation, and the reign of some ghastly square, like Queen
-Victoria. Thus were the girls of Engraham deprived of the pleasures of
-love."
-
-"The men, too," said Willy. All glared at him reproachfully. To care
-about the happiness of the Engrahamite men was thought not quite
-patriotic.
-
-"Gradually," Blunt went on, "they must have begun to lose interest.
-Probably there was some taboo. In the end they probably all thought, oh,
-to hell with it, and began serving on committees."
-
-A long sigh went up.
-
-"It is for us," Blunt said softly, treasuring each word, "to restore
-these unhappy maidens to their original human rights.
-
-"But it isn't going to be easy," Blunt went on. His voice dropped even
-lower. "Think what would happen if it went sour. Those Doctors would get
-wind of it. We'd be stuck in the Ship for the rest of the Exploration."
-
-There was a sober pause. Finally Banks cleared his throat and said,
-"Well, how do you think it should be handled, Blunt?"
-
-"Well, every beachhead needs an invasion," Blunt said, casually holding
-out his glass. O'Connors leapt to fill it. "One guy has got to lay the
-groundwork. Let him enlighten one quail. Explain things to her." He took
-a long, leisurely drink, and sighed. "This quail will rush around
-telling the others. Pretty soon there'll be so many hanging around the
-ship that--"
-
-There was a general rush for cooling beverages.
-
-"Right," someone said, when the faculty of speech was recovered.
-
-"And necessarily," said Blunt, "this has to be the guy with the most
-savvy. The one who knows the score. The one most likely to succeed.
-Check?"
-
-All knew what this was leading up to. Martin said unhappily, "Check,
-Blunt, You're our boy."
-
- ----
-
-Blunt was scheduled to stand guard the next day, but Willy Lanham, eager
-to assist the cause, volunteered to take over for him. The hours seemed
-to creep by. His air was swaggering and cool when he returned, and all
-gathered round with eager curiosity--all but Lanham, who had not
-recovered from standing guard.
-
-Blunt sauntered to the bar, accepted a drink, sipped it, lighted a
-cigarette, and took a long, pensive drag. Finally he said reminiscently,
-"What a doll!"
-
-Pane, never a subtle man, cried in anguish, "Well, how'd you make out?"
-
-Blunt smiled smugly. He began his recital. He was walking along the
-street and he met this gorgeous creature. A full description followed
-(broken by the arrival of the Colonel and two paragraphs of the DECLINE
-AND FALL) making it clear that this was the dish of dishes, the most
-beautiful of the beautiful, the most charming, and the most intelligent.
-She allowed herself to be addressed in Blunt's few words of Engrahamic
-and, smiling ever patiently, sat with him for several hours. Their talk
-took place in a secluded bower, in one of the many parks. She was
-agreeable and charmed and promised to see him again. He even managed,
-through terrific feats of pantomime, to impress on her the need of
-secrecy in future meetings.
-
-"That was all?" someone said, when he finished.
-
-"For the first meeting, I think I did wonders," said Blunt. "After all,
-sex hasn't been known here since a time corresponding to our Stone Age."
-
-Later, when the nightly poker game was beginning, Willy Lanham said,
-"Why didn't you just make a grab for her?"
-
-"That's the hill-billy approach," Blunt said disdainfully. "These girls
-are civilized--very, very civilized. It's important not to shock them."
-
- ----
-
-Blunt's next gambit was to set about learning the language. For this he
-went not to Flandeau, who best knew it, but to Ankers, who was a pure
-scientist in every sense of the word, and not so likely to suspect his
-motives. The girl proved very cultured. She took him to art galleries,
-to symphonies, and mountain climbing, for scrambling up and down the
-glassy hills was a favorite Engrahamic sport. As he advanced in the
-language, he learned that her name was Catataphinaria, which meant "she
-will attain relative wisdom". He found that she worked for the Eleven
-who, while not rulers, offered general suggestions which the populace
-more or less followed.
-
-Although his slow progress inevitably bored the crew, still, it offered
-that one precious ray of hope, and they became so tractable that even
-the Doctors noticed it. They laid it to the secret ingredient that Dr.
-Frank had introduced into the drinking water.
-
-The summer wore on, becoming hotter each day. By the end of the second
-month of his courtship, Blunt began to speak to her of love.
-
-She laughed. She said that she had little curiosity on the subject,
-although it was now and then mentioned by the students of antiquity.
-Assured that it was pleasurable, she said that she heard that barbarians
-also enjoyed murdering people and making them butts of jokes.
-
-Willy Lanham said, "Don't listen to what a girl _says_. Just make a grab
-for her."
-
-This suggestion was laughed to scorn.
-
-Weeks passed, the summer began to wane. Tempers again began to shorten.
-Flandeau said to Frank, "The men are worse again."
-
-"Yes, perhaps we should increase the dosage."
-
-The fruits for the Joy-Juicer grew thin on the silvery bushes, and men
-ranged far and wide, putting in supplies for the winter.
-
- ----
-
-One night, when Blunt had won at poker, all the men lay in their bunks,
-too dispirited to drink, to shoot craps, almost too miserable even for
-speech. Blunt again began talking of Catataphinaria. Drowsily Lanham
-said, "I think you're going at it the wrong way, Dick. Try some real
-rough stuff. You know--kiss her. She might like it."
-
-Before Blunt could defend his strategy, Kosalowsky sat up in his bunk.
-"Yes, for cripes sake," he said, "Move in for the kill. Or shut up about
-it. You're driving us all nuts."
-
-"Would you like to try?" Blunt suggested softly.
-
-"Sure I'll try," Kosalowsky said. He turned on the light over his bunk.
-"Give me a crack at her. I could have managed it weeks ago. All you've
-done is talk to the quail."
-
-"Yah, Dick, maybe you're using the wrong approach on this one,"
-O'Connors suggested.
-
-"It's the damn places you take her," Kosalowsky said. "Art galleries.
-Anybody ever seduce a girl in an art gallery? Symphonies. Popping around
-in her damn Hop-Hop. Can't you ever get her alone?"
-
-"She lives with ten other girls," Blunt said sulkily. "They're all home
-all the time."
-
-"Well, bring her here, then," Pane suggested. "We'll all take a powder."
-
-"Where?"
-
-There was no answer. They could not all, by day, desert the ship, and it
-was getting too chilly for the crew to hide in adjacent shrubbery. "We
-could put up a wall," Pane said suddenly, "between the bunks and the
-bar."
-
-"With what?"
-
-"I know," Banks said eagerly, "where there's a whole pile of stuff. It's
-nice thin metal, just lying there getting rusty."
-
-"I think you're premature--"
-
-"Premature!" Kosalowsky shouted. "Six months you've been chasing this
-tomato. You call that premature?"
-
-"Only four by Engrahamic time," Blunt said, insulted.
-
-"Listen," Kosalowsky said, "that wall goes up tomorrow. And you're
-smuggling her in tomorrow night. Or else," he said, glaring at Blunt,
-"after that it's every man for himself. Check?"
-
-Blunt, only slightly seen in the light from Kosalowsky's bunk, was white
-with rage. "All right, guys," he said stonily. "I've been trying to do
-right by this frail. Nothing abrupt or hillbilly. Nothing to hurt her
-delicate feelings or her fine mind. But if this is how you want
-it--Okay!"
-
- ----
-
-The next day the wall went up.
-
-Hardly a word was said as it was hammered in place. Once up, the place
-was G. I.'d thoroughly. The ash trays were washed, the floor vacuumed,
-and the lights adjusted to achieve the most tellingly seductive effect.
-Blunt went out at two, thin-lipped and silent.
-
-"The jerk," Kosalowsky said, "I think he's a lot of hot air. That's what
-_I_ think."
-
-The Colonel came in at nightfall and asked about the wall. They told him
-that it was to cut off the recreation section from the sleeping
-quarters, for the protection of those who wanted more sleep to prepare
-for the grueling winter watches.
-
-"Very good idea men," the Colonel said, and went upstairs to write
-another chapter in his book.
-
-At nine the men disappeared into their bunks. O'Connors won the
-responsible job of peering through the narrow slit in the wall. Behind
-him could be heard the labored breathing of twenty-seven distraught men.
-One man snored. "Wake up, you stupid ass," Pane told Lanham. "You'll
-wreck the show."
-
-At last the door opened and Blunt came in--with the girl.
-
-She was breath-taking. She wore, O'Connors reported, a dress cut to
-here--and her hair was piled high on her patrician head. Blunt had not
-lied. She was even prettier than the usual run of Engraham girls.
-
-"He's offering her a drink," O'Connors whispered.
-
-"She take it?"
-
-"No--she's sitting at the bar. He's having one, though. He's turning on
-the hi-fi."
-
-He did not have to tell them, since all could hear the soft music. They
-had selected a program of melodies considered sure-fire.
-
-"He's talking to her--putting his arm around her waist. Oh-oh. She
-knocked it off. She's laughing, though."
-
-In the silence they all heard her laugh. Several men moved
-uncomfortably. "He's leading her toward the couch--oh-oh--she stopped to
-look at the radar screen."
-
-It was the auxiliary radar, not the important one in the control room.
-"What's he doing?"
-
-"Telling her--he's edging her to the couch again--now she's asking about
-the Bassett Blaster. They're fooling around with the gun. He's showing
-her how it works--trying to put his hands--!"
-
-This last was lost, for there was a sudden, resounding blast. Their
-bunks, the entire ship, trembled.
-
-The meaning was clear to all. They flattened to their bunks, and waited
-tensely. They heard a sound, the sound of a foot kicking a body. A hand
-scratched tentatively along the wall.
-
-No one moved. "She killed him." O'Connors voice was no more than a
-slight whisper. "Lay low--lay low."'
-
-Then a woman's voice said, in perfect English, "All right, you men. Come
-out of there."
-
-The door was found and flung open. Catataphinaria stood in the dim
-light--still holding the Blaster. She said again, more sharply, "I said,
-Come out of there!"
-
-Clumsily, they came down from their bunks.
-
-"Now," she said, as she had them all against the wall, "call down the
-others."
-
-But this was unnecessary, for the Doctors and the Colonel were already
-descending the ladder. They turned quite white at the sight of her.
-Wordlessly, she indicated that they were to join the others. The Doctors
-found it harder to adjust to a purely military sort of emergency. Ankers
-asked clearly, "What on earth is this nonsense?"
-
-"No nonsense," the girl said. "Just do as I say. First, surrender all
-your papers."
-
-"Our papers?"
-
-"Your research. Your conclusions. Everything."
-
-Henderson said, "I'll go get it, Ma'am."
-
-"I would also like the Colonel's amusing work on the coming occupation."
-
-"I know where it is, sir," Martin said swiftly. "I'll get it."
-
-The Colonel's expression was stony. He nodded to Martin to get it, and
-it occurred to him that the girl was one of those whom he had personally
-selected as the most promising for the puppet governments. But when he
-asked about her identity, she cut him off without a word.
-
-"Then, may I ask where you learned such flawless English?"
-
-"All of us know English," she said. "It is a very stupid language."
-
-Martin and Henderson returned with the papers. Gingerly they approached
-her, handed the papers to her, and darted back to their places in the
-line. She placed the stack on the bar, leafed through it, all the while
-keeping them covered with the Blaster, and remarked on finishing, "It is
-exactly what one would expect barbarians to find interesting."
-
-Flandeau, however, remained a scientist to the last.
-
-"We find ourselves unhappily deceived," he said. "We were certain--that
-you were utterly without defenses. We were told that you did not know
-_how_ to lie, cheat, dissemble, or fight."
-
-"Only not with each other." she said. "It was, so to speak, a lost art."
-She glanced at Blunt. Several men squirmed. "But it is one that we have
-regained," she said.
-
-"And what will you do with us?" Flandeau asked.
-
-"We have decided to let you go," she said. "Now that we possess this
-weapon,"--she brandished the Blaster--"which we can copy, we think we
-can prevent more Explorations. At least this is the opinion of the
-Eleven. So I am instructed to let you leave--at once, of course."
-
-"You are most charming," said Flandeau.
-
-"At once," she repeated.
-
-"Yes, of course. Men! Prepare for blastoff!"
-
- ----
-
-The way back was tedious--the floating around, the boredom, the unending
-blackness of space--but at least it was going home. After the first
-weeks of space-sickness, things returned to near normal, and the Doctors
-conferred with the Colonel. It was decided that the best report should
-be that Engraham was uninviting, bleak, and of no interest to Earthmen.
-The reputations of all were at stake (the doctors found themselves,
-stripped of their papers, unable to recollect enough, and the Colonel
-desperately feared a court-martial) and the crew was thus advised. All
-agreed to keep their mouths shut. Thus their honorable discharges,
-medals, and life-time pensions would be safe.
-
-So, with all this decided, and Earth only a few months away, relative
-cheerfulness reigned. Only Willy Lanham continued to mope.
-
-"What's biting you?" Kosalowsky asked, one day as they lay strapped in
-adjacent bunks. "Your face is as long as this ship."
-
-"I just feel bad," Willy said. "I can feel bad if I want to, can't I?"
-
-"What the hell, we'll soon be home. We can really raise some hell,
-then."
-
-"I miss my girl," Willy blurted out.
-
-"You'll see her pretty soon."
-
-"I mean my girl on Engraham."
-
-It happened that just then several other men, bored with lying still,
-were floating past. They gripped the edges of Willy's bunk.
-
-"You mean you had," Kosalowsky said cunningly, "a girl on Engraham?"
-
-"Sure I did," said Willy defensively. "Didn't all you guys?"
-
-More and more men joined the knot of bodies around Willy's bunk. The
-atmosphere became distinctly menacing.
-
-"You mean you didn't?" Willy said. "You mean it wasn't a gag we were
-pulling on Blunt?"
-
-They were silent. One pair of floating hands neared Willy's throat.
-
-"Honest," he said. "I didn't think you were that dumb. I thought you
-were just letting Blunt make an ass of himself. I thought that--well, it
-was so easy. I even told Dick a couple of times. You just had to make a
-grab for 'em."
-
-Pane suddenly let out a harsh sound, like the cry of a wounded bull.
-
-"So who was this frail?" Kosalowsky asked heavily.
-
-"Yeah!" echoed the others.
-
-"Well, she was just a frail, I guess," Willy said. "I used to see her
-around the ship. On guard duty. I used to see her all the time. What the
-hell," he said, "You think I'm dumb or something? Why'd you think I was
-willing to stand guard all the time?"
-
-
- *END*
-
-
-
- _Transcribers note_: This etext was produced from If Worlds of Science
- Fiction February 1958. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence
- that the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.
-
-
-
-
-
-
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