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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of That Mother-in-Law of Mine, by Anonymous
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: That Mother-in-Law of Mine
+
+Author: Anonymous
+
+Release Date: October 16, 2009 [EBook #30270]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: UTF-8
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THAT MOTHER-IN-LAW OF MINE ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Irma Spehar, Markus Brenner and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+ THAT MOTHER-IN-LAW
+ OF
+ MINE.
+
+
+ “BE TO HER VIRTUES VERY KIND,
+ BE TO HER FAULTS A LITTLE BLIND.”
+
+
+ PHILADELPHIA:
+ THE KEYSTONE PUBLISHING CO.
+ 1889.
+
+
+
+ COPYRIGHT
+ BY JOHN E. POTTER AND COMPANY,
+ 1879
+
+
+
+ Dedicated
+ TO ALL THOSE HAVING
+ MOTHERS-IN-LAW
+ OR EXPECTING TO HAVE.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+
+CHAPTER Page
+
+ I. BESSIE AND I AND BESSIE’S MOTHER 7
+
+ II. COURTING THE MOTHER 15
+
+ III. OUR MARRIAGE 28
+
+ IV. MOUNTAINS AND MORE MOTHER-IN-LAW 37
+
+ V. THE RISE AND FALL 50
+
+ VI. WHAT IS HOME WITHOUT A MOTHER-IN-LAW? 71
+
+ VII. MISS VAN’S PARTY AND ANOTHER UNPLEASANTNESS 84
+
+VIII. ANOTHER CHARLIE IN THE FIELD 98
+
+ IX. THE SHADOW ON OUR LIFE 108
+
+ X. MY MOTHER-IN-LAW SUBDUED 115
+
+ XI. GEORGE’S NEW DEPARTURE 123
+
+ XII. BABY TALK, OLD DIVES, AND OTHER THINGS 138
+
+XIII. A SURPRISE 150
+
+ XIV. A HAPPY PROSPECT 158
+
+
+
+
+MY MOTHER-IN-LAW.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+BESSIE AND I AND BESSIE’S MOTHER.
+
+
+“Why, Charlie, you sha’n’t talk so about my mother! I won’t allow it.”
+
+“It does sound a little rough, my dear; but I can’t help it. She does
+exasperate me so. She doesn’t show a proper deference for your husband,
+my dear. We are married now, and she ought to give up her objections to
+me. I can’t be expected to place myself in her leading strings.”
+
+“But you mustn’t demand too much at once, and should try to conciliate
+her. Now do, for my sake; won’t you, dear?”
+
+Here we were, only a month married, and spending our honeymoon at a most
+charming summer resort, where there was no excuse for getting out of
+patience. Everything was beautiful and attractive: Little hotel,
+strange to say, quite delightful; no fault to find with surroundings and
+accommodations; my darling Bessie, as sweet as an angel and determined
+to be happy and to make me happy; everything, in short, calculated to
+give us a long summer of delight.
+
+That is, if Bessie had only been an orphan. But there was her mother,
+who had joined us on our summer trip, after the first two weeks of
+unalloyed happiness, and threatened to accompany us through life.
+Already it almost made the prospect dismal. The idea that Bessie and I
+would ever quarrel, or even have any impatient words together, had
+seemed to me to be simply ridiculous. I had seen what I had seen. My
+dashing friend, Fred, and his stylish wife,—they had been married two
+years, and a visible coldness had come upon them. I knew, by an
+occasional angry whisper and knitting of the brow before people, that he
+must sometimes swear and rave in the privacy of their own rooms, and her
+cutting replies or haughty indifference showed that there had been a
+deal of love lost between them in those two years.
+
+Other people, too, got indifferent or downright hostile in their
+marital relations. But then, I was not a dashing fellow and Bessie was
+not stylish, and in other ways we were quite different from most people.
+Ours had been a real love-match from the first. Bessie was simple and
+unaffected, honest and pure in every thought, and determined to make me
+a faithful and loving wife till death did us part. As for me, why, of
+course I was generous and affectionate, ready to make any sacrifice and
+bear any burden for the trusting creature who had so freely given
+herself into my keeping. There should be no clouds to darken her life. I
+would never be selfish or impatient, or for one moment hurt her gentle
+heart by heedless act or careless word.
+
+But plague upon it! I could not get on with her mother; and here I was,
+before our summer holiday was over, and before we had settled down to
+that home life in which trouble and annoyance must needs come, getting
+out of patience and saying cruel things; and there was Bessie, sitting
+in the summer twilight with a light shawl drawn over her shoulders,
+pouting her pretty lips with vexation, and digging the toes of her
+little boots into the balustrade in front of us, because I had expressed
+a pious wish that her mother was in Jericho. I declare, if there weren’t
+tears gathering in her gentle blue eyes!
+
+I was angry with myself, and, putting my arm around her slender waist, I
+laid my cheek against hers and said soothingly, “Never mind, darling! I
+didn’t mean it. Don’t think any more about it.”
+
+But as we sat for the next five minutes without saying a word, I
+couldn’t help pondering on the possibilities of the future, for Mrs.
+Pinkerton was to live with us. That was one of the understood conditions
+of our bargain, and it was evident that she was to furnish the test of
+all my good resolutions.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton had been left a widow when Bessie was twelve years old,
+with a neat little cottage in the suburbs of the city and a snug
+competence in a secure investment. I was fairly settled in business,
+with an income that would enable us to live in modest comfort, and was
+determined not to disturb the investment or have it drawn upon in any
+way for household expenses. But the old lady—I already began to speak
+of her by that disrespectful epithet, although she was still under
+fifty—was to live with us. I had readily acquiesced in that
+arrangement, for was it not my darling’s wish? And I could not decently
+make any objection, for it was mighty convenient to have a pretty
+cottage, ready furnished, in one of the finest suburbs of the city in
+which I was employed.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton was a good woman in her way: how could she be anything
+else and the mother of such an angel as I had secured for my wife? She
+meant well, of course; I admitted that, and I ought to be on the
+pleasantest terms with her, and determined from the first that I would
+be. But somehow we were not congenial, and when that is the case the
+best people in the world find it hard to get along agreeably together.
+
+The course of true love between Bessie and me had run very smooth. From
+the moment my old school-fellow, her brother George, now in Paris
+studying medicine, had introduced me to her, I had been completely won
+by her sweet disposition and charming ways, and she in turn was
+captivated by my manly independence, strong good sense, and generous
+impulses. I am not vain, but the truth is the truth; and, as I am
+telling this story myself, I must set down the facts. We fell in love
+right away, and it was not long before we were mutually convinced that
+we were made expressly for each other and could never be happy apart.
+
+So it happened that I had to do the courting with the mother. She was
+the one to be won over, and it was not likely to be an easy task, for I
+plainly saw that she did not quite approve of me. When I was first
+introduced to her, she looked at me with her great, steady blue eyes, as
+if analyzing me to the very boots, and evidently set me down as a
+somewhat arrogant and self-sufficient young fellow who needed a
+judicious course of discipline to teach him humility. I was generally
+self-possessed and had no little confidence in myself, but I confess
+that I was embarrassed in her presence. She was not at all like Bessie,
+I thought. She had taught school in her youth, and had learned to
+command and be obeyed. The late Mr. Pinkerton, I fancied, had found it
+useless to contend against her authority, and this had increased her
+disposition to carry things her own way; and her seven years’ widowhood,
+with its independence and self-reliance, had not prepared her to be
+submissive to the wishes of others.
+
+Still, she loved her daughter with tender devotion, and her chief
+anxiety was to have her every wish gratified. Therein was my advantage,
+for I knew that Bessie, gentle and trusting as she was, would never give
+me up or allow her life to be happy without the gratification of her
+first love. So I set to work confidently to make myself agreeable to the
+widow and win her consent to our marriage.
+
+“You must bring mamma around to approve of it,” Bessie had said, on that
+ever-to-be-remembered evening, when we were returning from a long drive,
+and after an hour of sweet confidences she had surrendered herself
+without reserve to my future keeping. “She is the best mother in the
+world, and loves me very much, but she is peculiar in some ways, and I
+am afraid she doesn’t altogether like you. I would not for the world
+displease her, that is, if I could help it,” she added, glancing up, as
+much as to say, “It is all settled now forever and forevermore, whatever
+may befall, but do get my mother to consent to it with a good grace.”
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+COURTING THE MOTHER.
+
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton sat in an easy-chair near the window, doing nothing, when
+I marched in to begin the siege. I felt diffident and uneasy, although I
+am not usually troubled that way. But if I should live to the advanced
+age of Methusaleh, I could never forget Mrs. Pinkerton’s appearance on
+that memorable occasion. Before I had spoken a word I saw that she knew
+what was coming, and had hardened her heart against me. She had
+anticipated all that I would say, had discounted my plea, as it were,
+and prejudged the whole case. Her look plainly said: “Young man, I know
+your pitiful story. You needn’t tell me. You may be very well as young
+men go, you fancy you can more than fill a mother’s place in Bessie’s
+inexperienced heart, but you can’t get me out. I am Adamant. Your
+intentions are all very honorable, but you are a graceless intruder.
+Your credentials are rejected on sight.” I saw the difficult task I had
+undertaken. “Mrs. Pinkerton,” I said, mustering all my forces, “it is no
+use mincing the matter, or beating about the shrubbery. I am in love
+with your daughter, and Bessie is in love with me. I believe I can make
+Bessie happy, and am sure nothing but Bessie can make me happy. I have
+come to ask your consent to our marriage.” Then I hung my head like a
+whipped school-boy.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton took off her eye-glasses, and then put them on again with
+considerable care; after which she leveled a look at me and through me
+that made me feel like calling out “Murder!” or making for the door. But
+I stood my ground, and heard her say quietly,—
+
+“So you are engaged to my daughter?”
+
+A simple remark, but the tone meant “You are a puppy.” I had to muster
+all my resolution to reply politely and coolly that, with her gracious
+consent, such was the fact.
+
+“Are you aware that it is customary to obtain parental consent before
+proceeding to such lengths?”
+
+“Mrs. Pinkerton, excuse me. I thought in my ignorance that it would be
+just as well to do that afterwards; or rather, I didn’t think anything
+about it. I was so much in love with Bessie that it was all out before I
+knew it. If I had thought, of course I would have—”
+
+“Yes, yes,” said Mrs. Pinkerton, “if your kind of people ever thought,
+they would undoubtedly do differently. Bessie certainly ought to know
+better. Girls rush into matrimony now-a-days with as much carelessness
+as they would choose partners at a game of croquet. I should have been
+consulted in this. It is all wrong to allow young people to have such
+entire freedom in affairs of this kind as they are allowed in these
+days.”
+
+“But certainly, my dear Mrs. Pinkerton,” I said, becoming somewhat
+impatient, “you will not refuse your consent in this case? Bessie’s
+happiness—that is, the happiness of all of us, or—our
+happiness—Bessie’s and mine, I would say—”
+
+“No doubt your happiness is very important to yourself, Mr. Travers,
+and as to my daughter’s well-being, I have looked to that for quite a
+number of years past, and I flatter myself I shall be able to look out
+for it in the future.”
+
+“Not if you insist on parting us!” I cried, getting out of patience and
+letting all my carefully prepared plans of assault go by the board. “You
+may withhold your consent, but that cannot prevent our loving each
+other!”
+
+“Of course not. Nothing on earth can prevent young people who are in
+love from making themselves ridiculous. But getting married and living
+together soon cures them of sentimentalism.”
+
+“Won’t you give us that chance to be cured then, my dear Mrs.
+Pinkerton?” I exclaimed, regaining a little tact.
+
+She seemed to be taking it under advisement, and my courage came up a
+little. Then, looking at me with her peculiarly searching gaze, she
+said, “It isn’t necessary to argue the case; I know all you would say.
+You love Bessie to distraction; you could not live without her; your
+heart would be hopelessly broken if you had to give her up; you will be
+true to her forever and a day; you offer her all of the good things of
+this world that any sane woman could desire, besides which you throw in
+an eternal, undying devotion; and so on, to the end of the chapter. We
+will consider that all said, and so save time and trouble. You think
+that ought to end the matter and bring me to your way of thinking. I
+wonder at the effrontery of young men, who walk into our households and
+carelessly tell us mothers what is best for our children, and assure us,
+between their puffs of tobacco smoke, that a case of three weeks’
+moonshining outweighs the devotion of a lifetime.”
+
+I began to see what course was open for me. The old lady was jealous,
+and I could not blame her. Her objections were general, not specific.
+Strategy must take the place of a direct assault. There flashed through
+my mind the ridiculous old nonsense rhyme quotation,—
+
+ “I must soften the heart of this terrible cow.”
+
+I said gently, “I can readily see how a mother must regard the claims of
+the man who comes to her demanding her most precious treasure; and what
+you say makes me feel how presumptuous my demand must seem. I love your
+daughter—that must be my only excuse. And after all, what has happened
+was only what a mother must expect. Your daughter’s love will not be the
+less yours because she also loves the man of her choice. That she should
+love and be loved was inevitable.”
+
+“We will not go into the discussion any further,” she interrupted. “I
+don’t wish to say anything uncomplimentary of you personally, but I
+simply am not prepared to give my daughter up at present. My opinion of
+men in general is good, so long as they do not interfere with me or
+mine.”
+
+(Mental note: “May there be precious little interference between us!”)
+
+“Your judgment is doubtless good,” I said, smiling; “but there are
+exceptions which prove the rule, and I hope you will find that even I
+will improve upon acquaintance.”
+
+“Your conceit is abominable, young man.”
+
+“Thank you. I have found no one who could flatter me except myself, so I
+lose no opportunity to give myself a good character.”
+
+“Especially in addressing the mother of the woman you wish to marry,
+eh?”
+
+“Precisely, as she is naturally prejudiced against me. My dear Mrs.
+Pinkerton, what must I do to please you?”
+
+“Hold your tongue!”
+
+“Anything but that. You admit that I am a good fellow enough, and that
+Bessie would probably marry some one in course of time. Now, I don’t see
+why you cannot make us both happy by giving your consent. It costs you a
+pang to do it. I honor you for that. Give me the right to console you.”
+
+“By making myself an object of pity? No, not yet, not yet. I must, at
+least, have time to think.”
+
+I inwardly cursed my luck. How long was this sort of thing going to
+last? I was about to rise and take my leave, when an inspiration struck
+me.
+
+“Mrs. Pinkerton,” I said gravely, “what you have said of the ties that
+exist between you and your daughter has touched me deeply. I believe we
+young people do not half appreciate a mother’s unchanging love. It lies
+so far beneath the surface that we are too apt to forget its constant
+blessing. My mother died when I was very young. Ah, if she were only
+here now, to plead my cause for me!”
+
+With these words, I turned on my heel and hastily got out of the room. I
+went into the garden and lighted a cigar, the better to think over the
+situation. I could not determine what progress, if any, I had made in
+the good graces of Mrs. Pinkerton. While I was cogitating, Bessie came
+out and approached me with an inquiring look. I am afraid my returning
+glance did not greatly reassure her. As she came up and took my arm, she
+said,—
+
+“Well?”
+
+“Well! No, it’s not very well. I am beaten, my dear. Your mother is
+simply a stony-hearted parent!”
+
+“What did she say?”
+
+“Oh, she wants you to grow up an old maid—as if such a thing were
+possible!—and says that lovers have no idea of what a mean, cruel thing
+it is to rob people of only daughters; and that she shall require time
+to think of it. What do you think of that?”
+
+Bessie knitted her pretty brows, and dug her toes into the walk.
+
+“Perhaps I had better go to her?” she said.
+
+“Of course you must. But I know it won’t be of any use just yet. We
+must, as she says, give her time. She will come around all right at the
+end of nine or ten years. The fact is, Bessie, she’s a little bit
+jealous of me and regards me as an intruder.”
+
+“Poor, dear mamma!” said Bessie, her eyes becoming moist.
+
+“Poor, dear pussy-cat! You should have seen her shoot me with her eyes
+and ridicule my honest sentiment. She used me roughly, my dear, and I
+can’t help wondering at my amazing politeness to her.”
+
+Bessie was not discouraged. She had several interviews with her mother,
+in which protestations, tears, smiles, and coaxings played a part, but
+there was no apparent change of heart on the part of the old lady, after
+all. I don’t know how long this disagreeable state of affairs would have
+continued under ordinary circumstances, had not an unexpected,
+thrilling, and, as it happened, fortunate occurrence hastened a crisis
+and brought an end to the siege. It was a very singular thing, and it
+seemed to have been pre-arranged to bring me glory, and, what was
+better, the desired goodwill of the “stony-hearted parent.”
+
+If there was any one thing that the worthy Mrs. Pinkerton detested more
+than men and tobacco, that thing was a burglar. Add fear to detestation,
+and you will see that when I defended the old lady from the attentions
+of a burglar, I had taken a long step into her good graces.
+
+It was a week after the interview narrated above, and in the early
+summer, Mrs. Pinkerton had gone down to a quiet sea-side resort for a
+short stay, thinking to get away from me; but I was not to be put off
+so. I followed her, taking a room at the same hotel.
+
+About one o’clock at night, the particular burglar to whom I owe so
+much, effected an entrance into the hotel through a basement window, and
+quietly made his way up stairs. Every one was asleep except myself, and
+I was planning all sorts of expedients to conquer the prejudices of my
+mother-in-law that was to be. Mrs. Pinkerton’s room opened on a long
+corridor, near the end of which my modest seven-by-nine snuggery was
+situated. It was a warm night, and the transoms over the doors of almost
+all the bed-chambers had been left open to admit the air. A gleam of
+light from a dark-lantern, coming through my transom, was what led me to
+hastily don a pair of trousers and take my revolver from my valise. Then
+I opened my door very cautiously, without having struck a light, and
+could see—nothing! I waited a few moments, almost holding my breath. At
+the end of those few moments I could make out the form of a man swarming
+over the top of the door of Mrs. Pinkerton’s room. His head and
+shoulders were already inside the room, and I could see his legs wriggle
+about as he noiselessly wormed his way through the narrow transom. It
+took me but a brief second of time to glide forward on tiptoe and mount
+the same chair which had been used by the intruder in climbing to the
+transom. This done, I seized both the wriggling legs simultaneously, and
+gave a tremendous pull.
+
+My excitement must have imbued me with double my natural strength, and
+the result of that pull was simply indescribable. Burglar,
+transom-glass, chair and all, went in a heap on the floor of the
+corridor, producing the most appalling and unearthly racket conceivable.
+The whole house was in an uproar in a moment. People seemed to spring up
+from every square foot of floor in the corridor as if by magic. Cries of
+“Fire!” “Murder!” “Help!” and screams of frightened women, rose on every
+hand. The costumes which I beheld on that momentous occasion were not
+only varied but exceedingly amusing and picturesque as well. The
+assembled multitude found nothing to interest them, however. I alone was
+to be seen, seated on a broken chair, with a rapidly swelling black eye,
+while broken glass and an extinguished lantern lay on the floor. I told
+the male guests what had happened. The burglar had not waited to ask for
+my card, but had contented himself with planting one blow from the
+shoulder on my left eye, before I could get upon my legs. And my
+revolver. Well, I had not had the ghost of a chance to use it. It was in
+my pocket. Fifteen minutes after the fracas, Mrs. Pinkerton came to my
+room, completely dressed, and insisted upon coming in to hear all about
+it and to overwhelm me with thanks and admiration. I was as modest as
+heroes proverbially are, and then and there told her never to refer to
+the subject again unless she addressed me as Bessie’s betrothed.
+
+We went riding together, Bessie, Mrs. Pinkerton, and I, the day after
+this episode; and without any previous indication of an approaching
+thaw, that singular old lady began to talk freely about what should be
+worn at “the wedding,” referring to it as though she had been the
+principal agent in bringing it about.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+OUR MARRIAGE.
+
+
+So it was that I brought my darling’s mother around to consent, if not
+with a very good grace, still with apparent cheerfulness, and she at
+once took the direction of the nuptial preparations. I made a show of
+consulting her about many things, but she invariably gave me to
+understand that her experience and superior knowledge in such matters
+were not to be gainsaid. I was willing to leave to her all the fuss and
+frippery of preparing clothes for her daughter. It always seemed to me
+that she had clothes enough, and clothes that were good enough for
+married life. I couldn’t understand why a young woman, on becoming a
+wife, should need a lot of new and elaborate dresses, such as she had
+never worn and never cared to wear, and an endless variety of
+under-garments of mysterious and incomprehensible make, with frills and
+fringes and laces and edgings, as if, up to that time, she had never had
+anything next to her precious person, except what was visible to the
+exterior world. And even assuming that she donned these things for the
+first time as parts of a manifold and complicated wedding garment, why
+should so much fine needle-work and delicate trimming be prepared to be
+stowed away out of sight of prying mortals, for whose vision women are
+presumed to dress themselves? Are they got up to show to friends and
+excite envy, and to fill the minds of other young people with a sense of
+the difficulties of getting married?
+
+One day, when I happened in,—by accident, of course,—and the mother
+happened to be out on one of her many pilgrimages to town, Bessie took
+me up to her room in a half-frightened way, as if doing something that
+she was afraid was terribly improper, and showed me a bewildering
+profusion of these things, neatly tucked away in bureau drawers. I
+laughed outright, and asked her who was to see all that finery. She was
+vexed and bit her lip, and I was sorry and voted myself a brute. From
+that moment, I determined not to say a word about the clothes, except to
+express unstinted admiration.
+
+There was not only clothing, but blankets and quilts and bed linen,
+though we were to live in her old home, which was already well supplied.
+One would suppose that a large and sudden increase of family was
+expected at once. These things annoyed me as senseless, and as absorbing
+so much of my Bessie’s attention that we didn’t have half the blissful
+times together that we had before our engagement was an acknowledged
+thing. But I knew that it was the mother’s doings. Bessie did not really
+have any foolish care for dress, though always beautifully arrayed
+without any apparent effort; but she supposed it was the proper thing,
+and submitted to her mother.
+
+But there was one thing I set my heart on. I wanted a quiet wedding,
+without display or pretence. It did seem to me that this was a private
+occasion in which the wishes of the persons chiefly concerned should be
+consulted. It was their business and should be conducted in their own
+way. Bessie sympathized with me, and wanted of all things to go to
+church quietly and privately, and then, after a leave-taking with a few
+intimate friends at home, start right off on our proposed trip to the
+White Mountains. But no; we were inexperienced, and the widow knew what
+the occasion demanded much better than we did. She was a little grand in
+her ideas, and felt the importance of keeping on good terms with
+society. I was disposed to apply profane epithets to society, and to
+insist that this marriage was mine and Bessie’s, and nobody’s else. But
+what was the use? There would be unpleasant feelings, and the mamma must
+be conciliated, and so I yielded after a warm but altogether
+affectionate little controversy with Bessie.
+
+Every time I came to the house now, I was informed of some new feature
+which Mrs. P. had decided upon as indispensable to the gorgeousness of
+the occasion.
+
+“Have you ordered your dress suit yet?” she asked one evening.
+
+“Dress suit? Oh yes. I had almost forgotten that.”
+
+“And, by the way, those cards? I think you had better send them out:
+you write such a good, legible hand.”
+
+“Y-e-s, oh yes. With pleasure.”
+
+“When you go to the city to-morrow, I wish you would drop in at Draper’s
+and get me a few little things. I have made out a list, so it won’t be
+any trouble to you.”
+
+“No trouble at all. Glad to do it.”
+
+“That white ribbon should be medium width. And before I forget it, have
+you written yet to your friend De Forest about his standing up?”
+
+“No, I forgot it. I’ll drop him a line to-morrow. But what do you want
+that ribbon to be so long for?”
+
+“That is to be held across the aisle by the ushers, you know, to keep
+off the _ignobile vulgus_. You and Bessie will march up _here_, you see,
+preceded by the four ushers and the bridesmaids and groomsmen, who will
+then range themselves off this way. The members of the families and the
+friends will be separated from the other people _thus_. It’s very
+pretty. Belle Graham was married that way at St. Thomas’s, and everybody
+said it was splendid.”
+
+This is the kind of talk I had to listen to for weeks, and is it any
+wonder that I grew thin and had sleepless nights?
+
+I was now a mere puppet in the hands of Mrs. Pinkerton, and came and
+went as she pulled the wires. She had arranged that the affair was to
+take place in “her church”—and a very fashionable temple of worship it
+was. Her rector was to officiate, assisted by the vealy young man who
+had just graduated from the theological seminary. There were to be four
+bridesmaids and an equal number of groomsmen and of ushers. I should
+have liked to have something to say about who should “stand up” with us,
+as Mrs. Pinkerton expressed it; but when I timidly suggested that some
+of my friends would be available for the purpose, I was taken aback to
+learn that the entire list had been made up and decided upon without my
+knowledge, and that only one of the groomsmen chosen was a friend of
+mine,—De Forest,—the others being young men whom the worthy Mrs.
+Pinkerton had selected from her list of society people. One of the young
+men was a downright fool, if I must call things by their right names,
+but he dressed to perfection; the remaining two I scarcely knew by
+sight, but I did know that one of them had seen the time when he aspired
+to occupy the place I was now filling in respect to the Pinkerton
+household: need I say more concerning my sentiments regarding him?
+
+The ushers,—well, of course, they were the four young gentlemen who
+knew everybody who was anybody, and I could not object to them,
+considering that they charged nothing for their onerous services.
+
+The bridesmaids were all old school friends of Bessie’s, and two of them
+were considered pretty, and the other two were stylish.
+
+One of my keenest regrets was that Bessie’s brother George was away off
+in Paris, and could not grace the occasion with his superb presence; for
+he was a superb fellow in all respects, and I felt a true brotherly
+affection for him. Had he not introduced me to Bessie? Had he not always
+wanted me to become his brother-in-law?
+
+The great day came at last. The town was full of the invited people, and
+the weather, so anxiously looked to on such occasions, was all that
+could be desired. My remembrance of the solemn events of that day is
+now rather misty. I remember the tussle De Forest and I had with my
+collar and cravat in the morning, and how he stuck pins into my neck,
+and wrestled mightily with his own elaborate toilet. I remember, and
+this very distinctly, how awfully tight were my new patent-leather
+boots, which caused me for the time being the most excruciating anguish.
+Beyond these, and similar minor things which have a way of sticking in
+the memory, all the rest is very much like a vivid dream. The close
+carriage whirling through the streets; a great crush of people, with
+here and there a familiar, smiling face; Bessie in her wedding-dress of
+white silk, with her long veil and twining garlands of orange blossoms;
+the bridesmaids, radiant in tarletan, with pretty blue bows and sashes;
+the long aisle, up which we marched with slow and reverent tread; the
+pealing measures of the Wedding Chorus; the dignified and fatherly
+clergyman; the vealy young assistant; the unction of the slowly intoned
+words of the marriage-service; the fumbling for the ring,—and through
+it all there rises, as out of a mist, the face of my mother-in-law, the
+presiding genius of it all, the unknown quantity in the equation of my
+married life, now begun amid the felicitations, more or less sincere, of
+a host of kissing, hand-shaking, smiling, chattering, good-natured
+aunts, uncles, cousins, and relatives of all degrees.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+MOUNTAINS AND MORE MOTHER-IN-LAW.
+
+
+So the bells were rung, metaphorically speaking, and we were wed. I had
+a long leave of absence from the banking-house in which I held a
+responsible and confidential position, and we started for the mountains,
+leaving mamma Pinkerton to put things to rights and follow us in a
+fortnight, when we had decided to settle down for a month’s quiet stay
+in a picturesque town of the mountain region. Oh, the unrestrained joy
+of that fortnight! Everybody at the hotels seemed to know by instinct
+that we were a newly-married pair, and knowing glances passed between
+them. But what did we care? With pride and a conscious embarrassment
+that made my hand tremble, I wrote on the registers in a bold hand
+“Charles Travers and wife.” I asked for the best room with a pleasant
+out-look. The smiling clerk, trained to dissimulation, would appear as
+unconscious as the blank safe behind him, but he knew all the while, the
+sly rascal, that we were on a wedding trip, and he paid special
+attention to our comfort. We saw the glories and wonders of the
+mountains, and shared their inspiration as with a single heart. We rose
+early to drink the clear air and greet the rising sun together. We
+strolled out in the evening to romantic spots, and there, with arms
+around each other, as we walked or stood gazing on the scene and
+listening to the rustling breeze, we were happy. For two weeks our lives
+blended with each other and with nature, and it was with a sigh that we
+mounted the lumbering stage to take up our sojourn in the retired town
+on the hills. We came to the little hotel just at night, and were stared
+at and commented upon by those who had been there three days and assumed
+the air of having had possession for years. We were tired, and kept
+aloof that evening, and the next day mother-in-law arrived.
+
+As she dismounted from the coach, she gave the driver a severe warning
+to be careful of her trunk, an iron-bound treasure that would have
+defied the efforts of the most determined baggage-smasher. Bessie had
+flown to meet her, and their greeting was affectionate; but to me the
+old lady presented a hand encased in a mitt, or sort of glove with
+amputated fingers, and gave me a stately, “I hope you are well, sir,”
+that rather made me feel sick. She looked full at me in her steady and
+commanding way, as much as to say, “Well, you have committed no
+atrocious crime yet, I suppose; but I am rather surprised at it.”
+
+If there is anything I pride myself on, it is self-possession and a
+willingness to face anybody and give as good as I get, but that
+magnificently imperious way of looking with those large eyes always
+disconcerted me. I could not brace myself enough to meet them with any
+show of impudence, though the old lady had not ceased to regard that as
+the chief trait of my character. As Mrs. Pinkerton trod with stately
+step the rude piazza of that summer hotel, she put her eye-glasses on
+and surveyed its occupants with a look that made them shrink into
+themselves and feel ashamed to be sitting about in that idle way. I
+believe the old lady’s eyesight was good enough, and that she used her
+glasses, with their gold bows and the slender chain with which they were
+suspended about her neck, for effect. I noticed that if they were not on
+she always put them on to look at anything, and if they happened to be
+on she took them off for the same purpose.
+
+“Well,” she said, going into the little parlor, and looking from the
+windows, “this really seems to be a fine situation. The view of the
+mountains is quite grand.”
+
+“Very kind of you to approve of the mountains, but you could give them
+points on grandeur,” I thought; but I merely remarked, “We find it quite
+pleasant here.”
+
+She turned and glanced at me without reply, as much as to say, “Who
+addressed you, sir? You would do well to speak when you are spoken to.”
+I was abashed, but was determined to do the agreeable so far as I could,
+in spite of the rebuke of those eyes.
+
+“The house doesn’t seem to me to be very attractive,” she continued,
+glancing around with a gaze that took in everything through all the
+partition walls, and assuming a tone that meant, “I am speaking to you,
+Bessie, and no one else.” “What sort of people are there here?”
+
+“Oh, some very pleasant people, I should judge,” said Bessie, “but we
+have been here only one day, you know, and have made no acquaintances to
+speak of. Charlie’s friend, Fred Marston, from the city, is here with
+his wife; and I met a young lady to whom I took quite a fancy this
+morning, a Miss Van Duzen. She is quite wealthy, and an orphan, and is
+here with her uncle, a fine-looking gentleman, who is president of a
+bank, or an insurance company, or some thing of the sort. You saw him, I
+think, on the piazza,—the large man, with gray side-whiskers, white
+vest, and heavy gold chain.”
+
+“Yes, I noticed him. A pompous-looking old gentleman, isn’t he?”
+
+“Oh, he is dignified in his manner, but not at all pompous,” was the
+reply.
+
+“Well, I call him pompous, if looks mean anything,” said the mother,
+with the air of one to whom looks were quite sufficient. “I think I will
+go to my room,” she added, and turned a glance on me, as much as to say,
+“You needn’t come, sir.” I had no intention of going, and wandered out
+on the piazza, feeling as though Bessie had almost been taken away from
+me again.
+
+When she rejoined me, leaving her mother above stairs, I asked, “What
+does she think of her room?”
+
+“Well, it doesn’t quite suit her. She thinks the furniture scanty and
+shabby, water scarce, towels rather coarse, and she can’t endure the
+sight of a kerosene lamp; but she will make herself quite comfortable, I
+dare say.”
+
+“And everybody else uncomfortable,” I felt like adding, but restrained
+myself.
+
+She came down to tea, and being offered a seat on the other side of me
+from Bessie, firmly declined it, and took the one on the other side of
+her daughter from me. As she unfolded her napkin she took in the whole
+table with a searching glance, and had formed a quick estimate of
+everybody sitting around it. Miss Clara Van Duzen and Mr. Desmond, her
+uncle, sat opposite, and an introduction across the table took place.
+The young lady was vivacious and talkative, and tried to make herself
+agreeable, but my mother-in-law did not like what she afterwards called
+her “chatter,” and set her down as a frivolous young person. “Miss Van,”
+as everybody called her, with her own approval,—for, as she said, she
+detested the Duzen which her Dutch ancestors had bequeathed her with
+their other property,—was of New York Knickerbocker origin, now living
+with her uncle in Boston, and was by no means frivolous, though
+uncommonly lively. She had fine, brown eyes, beautiful hair, and a
+complexion that defied sun and wind. It had the rosy glow of health, and
+indicated a good digestion and high spirits. Mr. Desmond seemed to be
+mostly white vest, immaculate shirt-front, and gold chain, the
+last-named article being very heavy and meandering through the
+button-holes of his vest and up around his invisible neck. He said
+little, and was evidently not much given to light conversation. He was
+very gracious in his attentions to the ladies, however, and seemed to
+pay special deference to Mrs. Pinkerton. I afterwards learned that he
+was a widower of long standing, without chick or child, and the guardian
+of his niece, whom he regarded with great admiration.
+
+Down at the other end of the table was Marston, evidently giving vent
+to his impatience about something, and his wife, with fierce eyes,
+telling him, in manner if not in words, not to make a fool of himself.
+The rest of the company was made up either of transient visitors or of
+persons with whom this story has nothing in particular to do.
+
+As we emerged on the piazza after tea, Fred, who had impolitely gone out
+in advance, called out, “Charlie, old boy, come over here and have a
+smoke!”
+
+I must confess that these long sittings on the piazzas of summer hotels
+had lured me back to my old habits, which I had forsworn in my efforts
+to conciliate Bessie’s mother. Bessie had encouraged me in it, for to
+tell the truth she rather liked the fragrance of a good cigar, and
+dearly loved to see me enjoying it. It was my nature to defy the whole
+world and be master of my own habits, but I had felt a mean inclination,
+after mother-in-law joined the party, to slink away and smoke on the
+sly. There was nothing for it now, however, but to put on a bold face,
+or play the hypocrite and pretend I didn’t smoke. The latter I would
+not do, and if I had attempted it, it wouldn’t go down with Fred, and I
+should have been in a worse predicament than ever. I went boldly across
+the piazza and took the proffered cigar. Glancing out at the corner of
+my eye as I was lighting it, I saw my mother-in-law regarding me through
+her glasses with increased disfavor. She did not, however, seem to be
+surprised, and doubtless believed me capable of any perfidy.
+
+“I say, Charlie, old boy, let’s have a game of billiards,” said Fred,
+after a few puffs. “I’ll give you twenty points and beat you out of your
+boots.” Now I was very fond of billiards, and usually didn’t care who
+knew it, but Mrs. Pinkerton did not approve of the game, and had no
+knowledge that I indulged in it. But Fred would speak in that absurd
+shouting way of his, and all the ladies heard him. Again I mustered up
+resolution and went into the billiard room, but I played very
+indifferently, and was thinking all the time of my mother-in-law and her
+opinion of me. I really wanted to get into her good graces, but it
+required the sacrifice of all my own inclinations, and I despised a man
+who deliberately played the hypocrite to win anybody’s favor.
+
+After two or three listless games I said to Fred, “I guess I will join
+the ladies.” I was feeling some qualms of conscience for staying away
+from Bessie a whole hour at once.
+
+“Oh, hang the ladies!” was Fred’s graceless response; “they can take
+care of themselves. My wife gets along well enough without me, I know,
+and yours will soon learn to be quite comfortable without your guardian
+presence; besides she’s got her mother now. By the way, what a mighty
+grand old dowager Mrs. Pink is!”
+
+“Pinkerton is her name,” I said, a little haughtily, as if resenting the
+liberty he took with my mother-in-law’s cognomen.
+
+“Oh, yes, I know, but the name is too long; and besides, she reminds one
+of a full-blown pink, a little on the fade, perhaps, but still with a
+good deal of bloom about her. Is she going to live with you? Precious
+fine time you will have!” he added, having received his answer by a nod.
+“She’ll boss the shebang, you bet!”
+
+“Oh, I guess not,” I answered, not liking his slangy way of talking
+about my affairs, and resolving in my own mind that I would be master in
+my own house.
+
+“Well, then there’ll be a fine old tussle for supremacy, and don’t you
+forget it!”
+
+With this remark Fred wandered off down the dusty road, humming Madame
+Angot, and I drew up a chair by Bessie’s side. She had evidently been
+wishing I would come. Mr. Desmond was sitting a little apart from the
+rest, twisting his fingers in his watch-chain and looking intently at
+the mountain-top opposite, as if expecting somebody to come over with a
+dispatch for him. Mrs. Pinkerton sat by her daughter’s side in calm
+grandeur, her gray puffs—that fine silver-gray that comes prematurely
+on aristocratic brows—seeming like appendages of a queenly diadem. Miss
+Van had been diverting the company with a lively account of her day’s
+adventures. She was always having adventures, and had a faculty of
+relating them that was little short of genius.
+
+“Well, my dear, are you having a good time?” I murmured in Bessie’s ear.
+
+“Oh, yes; but I was feeling a little lonesome without you.”
+
+The conversation degenerated into commonplace about the scenery and
+points of interest in the neighborhood, and after a while the company
+dispersed with polite good-evenings.
+
+When we reached our room, I remarked to Bessie, who seemed more quiet
+than usual, “I hope your mother will like it here.”
+
+“Oh, yes, I guess she will like it when she has been here a little
+while,” was the answer. “You know she has not been away from home much,
+of late years, except to the seaside with the Watsons and other of her
+old friends, and she does not adapt herself readily to strange company.”
+
+I said nothing more, but was absorbed in thought about my mother-in-law.
+It is evident by this time that she was no ordinary woman, no coarse or
+waspish mother-in-law, but a woman of good breeding and the highest
+character. She was intelligent and well-informed, a consistent member of
+the Episcopal Church, with the highest views of propriety and a
+reverential regard for the rules of conduct laid down by good society.
+This made her all the harder to deal with. If she were a common or
+vulgar sort of mother-in-law, I could assert my prerogatives without
+compunction; and I was forced to admit that she was a very worthy woman,
+and not given to petty meddling, but I felt that her presence was an
+awful restraint. Without her we could have such good times, going and
+coming as we pleased, and acting with entire freedom; but she must be
+counted in, and was a factor that materially affected the result. She
+could not be ignored; her opinions could not be disregarded. That would
+be rude, and besides, their influence would make itself felt. Strange,
+the irresistible effect of a presence upon one! She might not openly
+interfere or directly oppose, but there she was, and she didn’t approve
+of me or like my friends, could not fall in with my ways or my wishes,
+and make one of any company in which I should feel at ease, and I knew
+that her presence would be depressing, and spoil our summer’s pleasure;
+and after that was over and we were at home, what? Well, sufficient unto
+the day is the evil thereof. We slept the sound sleep that mountain and
+country quiet brings, and took the chances of the future.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+THE RISE AND FALL.
+
+
+During the next week of our stay at the Fairview hotel, it grew rather
+dull. There was little to do but drive on the long country roads, or
+wander over the hills and in the fields and woods. I could have found
+plenty of pleasure in that with Bessie and a party of congenial friends,
+but it didn’t seem to be right always to leave my worthy mother-in-law
+behind, with her crochet work or the last new novel from the city, on
+the sunny piazza or in her dim little chamber. She was not averse to
+drives, in fact enjoyed them very much, but she seemed to divine that I
+did not really want her company, though I protested, as became a dutiful
+son-in-law, that I should be very glad to take her at any time. She did
+go with us once or twice, but the laughter and romping behavior which
+gave our rides their chief zest were extinguished, and we jogged along
+in the most proper manner, professing admiration for the outlines of the
+hills and the far-away stretches of scenery between the more distant
+mountains. We returned as quiet and demure as if we had been to a
+funeral. Mrs. Pinkerton saw the effect, and with her fine feeling of
+independence, she politely but firmly declined to go afterwards. As for
+walking on anything but level sidewalks or gravel-paths, she could not
+think of such a thing. The idea of her climbing a hill or getting
+herself over a fence seemed ridiculous to anybody that knew her.
+
+So it was that we were continually forced to leave her behind, or deny
+ourselves the chief recreation of the country. I was sincerely
+disinclined to slight her in any way, and desirous of contributing to
+her pleasure, but what could I do? A fellow can’t get an iceberg to
+enjoy tropical sunshine. Our dislike to leave the old lady alone,
+although she insisted that she didn’t mind it at all, led us to pass a
+large portion of each day, sometimes all day, about the house. It was
+“deuced stupid,” to use Marston’s elegant phrase, but there was little
+to do for it. To be sure, there was Desmond, “old Dives,” Fred called
+him. He seldom went out of sight of the house, but he had a perfect
+mail-bag of newspapers and letters every morning, and spent the forenoon
+indoors, holding sweet communion with them and answering his
+correspondents. In the afternoon he sat on the piazza by the hour,
+contemplating the mountain-top that had such a fascination for him. He
+had a prodigious amount of information on all manner of subjects, and a
+quick and accurate judgment; but he was generally very reticent, as he
+tipped back in his chair and twisted his fingers in and out of that fine
+gold chain. My mother-in-law, from her shady nook of the piazza, would
+glance at him occasionally from her work or her book, as much as to say,
+“It is strange people can’t make some effort to be agreeable, instead of
+being so stiff and dignified all the afternoon”; but he seemed
+unconscious of her looks and her mental comments. His thoughts were
+probably in the marts of trade.
+
+Fred was continually going off to distant towns, or down to the great
+hotels in the mountains, for livelier diversion. His wife often insisted
+on going with him, to his evident disgust, not because she cared to be
+in his company, but because she wanted to go to the same places and
+could not well go alone. Now, Fred wasn’t a bad fellow at heart. I had
+known him for years, and used to like him exceedingly. But he was left
+without a father at an early age, with a considerable fortune, and his
+mother was indulgent and not overwise. He got rather fast as he grew up,
+and then he contracted a thoughtless marriage with Lizzie Carleton, a
+handsome and stylish young lady, fond of dress and gay society, and
+without a notion of domestic responsibility or duty. Like most women who
+are not positively bad, she had in her heart a desire to be right, but
+she didn’t know how. She was all impulse, and gave way to whims and
+feelings, as if helpless in any effort to manage her own waywardness. As
+a natural consequence there were constant jars between the pair. Fred
+took to his clubs and mingled with men of the race-course and the
+billiard halls, and Lizzie beguiled herself as best she could with her
+fashionable friends.
+
+And where was Miss Van Duzen these long and tedious days? They were
+never tedious to her, for she was always on the go. She would go off
+alone on interminable strolls, and bring back loads of flowers and
+strange plants, and she could tell all about them too. Her knowledge of
+botany was wonderful, and she could make very clever sketches; she would
+sit by the hour on some lonely rock, putting picturesque scenery on
+paper, just for the love of it; for when the pictures were done she
+would give them away or throw them away without the least compunction.
+She had a fine sense of the ludicrous and was all the time seeing funny
+things, which she described in a manner quite inimitable. She had grown
+up in New York, before her father’s death, in the most select of
+Knickerbocker circles, but there was not a trace of aristocracy in her
+ways. She was sociable with the ostler and the office-boy, and agreeable
+to the neighboring farmers, talking with them with a spirit that quite
+delighted them. And yet there was nothing free and easy in her ways that
+encouraged undue familiarity. It was merely natural ease and good
+nature. She inspired respect in everybody but my mother-in-law, who was
+puzzled with her conduct, so different from her own ideas of propriety,
+and yet so free from real vulgarity. Mrs. Pinkerton could by no means
+approve of her, and yet she could accuse her of no offence which the
+most rigid could seriously censure.
+
+Miss Van was the life of the company when she was about, telling of her
+adventures, getting up impromptu amusements in the parlor, and planning
+excursions. She was the only person in the world, probably, who was
+quite familiar with Mr. Desmond, and she would sit on his knee, pull his
+whiskers, and call him an “awful glum old fogy,” whereat he would laugh
+and say she had gayety enough for them both. He admired and loved her
+for the very qualities that he lacked.
+
+All this while I was trying to win the gracious favor of my
+mother-in-law, but it was up-hill work. She would answer me with severe
+politeness, and volunteer an occasional remark intended to be pleasant,
+but the moment I seemed to be gaining headway, a turn at billiards with
+Marston, for whom she had a great aversion, a thoughtless expression
+with a flavor of profanity in it, or my cigars, which I now indulged in
+without restraint, brought back her freezing air of disapproval.
+
+“Oh, dear!” I yawned sometimes, “why can’t I go ahead and enjoy myself
+without minding that very respectable and severe old woman?” But I
+couldn’t do it. I was always feeling the influence of those eyes, and
+even of her thoughts. I couldn’t get away from it. Sunday came, and Mrs.
+Pinkerton expressed the hope that we were to attend divine service
+together. I hadn’t thought of it till that moment, and then it struck me
+as a terrible bore. There was no church within ten miles except a little
+white, meek edifice in the neighboring village, occupied alternately by
+Methodist and Baptist expounders of a very Calvinistic, and, to me, a
+very unattractive sort of religion. It was not altogether to my
+mother-in-law’s liking, but she regarded any church as far better than
+none.
+
+“I presume you will go, sir,” she said, addressing me when I made no
+reply to the previous hint. She always used “sir,” with a peculiar
+emphasis, when any suggestion was intended to have the force of a
+command.
+
+“Well, really, I had not thought about it,” I said, rather vexed, as I
+secretly made up my mind, reckless of my policy of conciliation, that I
+would not go at any price. A tedious, droning sermon of an hour and
+perhaps an hour and a half in a country church, full of dismal
+doctrines,—the sermon, not the church,—I couldn’t stand, I thought.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton’s eyes were upon me, waiting for a more definite answer.
+“I—well, no, I don’t think I really feel like it this morning. I
+thought I would read to Bessie quietly in our room, and take a rest.”
+
+“Very well, sir,” she said, “Bessie and I will walk down to the
+village.”
+
+“The deuce you will!” I thought; “walk a mile and a half on a dusty
+road; to be bored!” I knew it was useless to protest, and I was too
+wilful to take back what I had said, have the team harnessed, and go,
+like a good fellow, to church. “No, I’ll be blowed if I do!” I muttered.
+
+So off went the widow and her daughter without me. Bessie tripped around
+to me on the piazza, looking like a fairy in her white dress and bit of
+blue ribbon, gave me a sweet kiss, and said, “I’ll be back before
+dinner. Have a nice quiet time, now.”
+
+“Oh, yes; have a nice quiet time, and you gone off with that old
+dragon!” It was a wicked thought, for she was not a bit of a dragon, but
+the feeling came over me that I was going to feel miserable all the
+forenoon, and so I did. Miss Van and her uncle had gone early to the
+neighboring town, the largest in the county, for church and the
+opportunity of observing; Fred and his wife had gone, the night before,
+round to the other side of the mountains, where there was to be a sort
+of ball or hop at the leading hotel; and the rest of the people in the
+house might as well have been in the moon, for all that I cared about
+them. A nice quiet time! Oh, yes; lounging about and trying to think of
+something besides Mrs. Pinkerton and my own shabby behavior. I would ten
+times rather have been in the dullest country church that ever echoed to
+the voice of the old and unimproved theology of Calvin’s day. But I was
+in for it, and lay in the hammock and looked through the stables, tried
+to read, tried to sleep, started on a walk and came back, and almost
+cursed the quiet country Sunday, as specially calculated to make a man
+of sense feel wretched.
+
+At last Bessie and her mother returned, and we had dinner. In the
+afternoon I was an outcast from Mrs. Pinkerton’s favor, but I had Bessie
+and read to her, and, on the whole, got through the rest of the day
+comfortably.
+
+The week following I began to feel that this was getting tiresome. Under
+other circumstances it might be very pleasant, but really I began to
+doubt whether I was enjoying it. But I made up my mind that during these
+days of leisure I ought to be making progress in the favor of my
+mother-in-law, with whom I was destined to live, nobody could say how
+many years. I couldn’t and wouldn’t make a martyr or a hypocrite of
+myself. I wouldn’t conceal my actions or deny myself freedom. So I
+smoked with Fred, played billiards, rolled ten-pins with Fred’s wife and
+Miss Van, and even beguiled Bessie into that vigorous and healthful
+exercise, which brought a gentle reprimand from her mother, addressed to
+her but directed at me. She did not think that kind of amusement
+becoming to ladies who had a proper respect for themselves.
+
+“Why, mamma, Miss Van Duzen plays, and says she thinks it jolly fun,”
+said Bessie innocently.
+
+“That doesn’t alter the case in the least,” was the rejoinder. “Miss Van
+Duzen can judge for herself. I don’t think it proper. Besides, your
+husband’s familiar way with those ladies—one of whom is married and no
+better than she ought to be, if appearances mean anything—does not
+please me at all.”
+
+“O mamma, how absurd! I see no harm in it at all, and poor Lizzie, I am
+sure, never means any harm.”
+
+“Well, well, my dear, I don’t wish to say anything about other people,
+and I only hope you will never have occasion to see any harm in your
+husband’s evident preference for the company of people with loose
+notions about proper and becoming behavior.”
+
+On Saturday of that week a little incident occurred that raised me
+perceptibly in Mrs. Pinkerton’s estimation. The great, lumbering
+stage-coach came up just at evening, more heavily laden than usual, and
+top-heavy with trunks piled up on the roof. The driver dashed along with
+his customary recklessness, the six horses breaking into a canter as
+they turned to come up the rather steep acclivity to the house. The
+coach was drawn about a foot from its usual rut, one of the wheels
+struck a projecting stone, and over went the huge vehicle, passengers,
+trunks, and all. The driver took a terrible leap and was stunned. The
+horses stopped and looked calmly around on the havoc. There was great
+consternation in and about the house. Here my natural self-possession
+came into full play. I took command of the situation at once, directed
+prompt and vigorous efforts to the extrication of the passengers, had
+the injured ones taken into the house, applied proper restoratives, and
+in a few minutes ascertained that only one was seriously hurt. She was a
+young girl, who had insisted on riding outside, higher up even than the
+driver. She had been thrown headlong, striking, fortunately, on the
+grass, but terribly bruising one side of her face and dislocating her
+left shoulder. In a trice I had made her as comfortable as possible;
+dashed down to the village for the nearest doctor, having had the
+forethought to order a team harnessed in anticipation of such a
+necessity; and, having started the doctor up in a hurry, kept on to the
+neighboring county town for a surgeon who had considerable local
+reputation. I had him on the ground in a surprisingly short time, and
+before bedtime the unfortunate girl was put in the way of recovery,
+having received no internal injury.
+
+My behavior in this affair, as I said, gave me a lift in my
+mother-in-law’s estimation, and of course filled Bessie with the most
+unbounded admiration, though I had never thought of the moral effect of
+my action. In the morning I determined to follow up my advantage. It was
+Sunday again, and I bespoke the team early, to go to the neighboring
+town, where there was an Episcopal church, and where, for that day, a
+distinguished divine from the city, who was spending his vacation in
+those parts, was to hold forth. When I had announced my preparation for
+the religious observance of the day, I actually received what was
+almost a smile of approval from my mother-in-law. I enjoyed the ride,
+and was not greatly bored by the service, for I was thinking of
+something else most of the time, or amusing my mind with the native
+congregation. We got back late to dinner, and the rest had left the
+dining-room. The ladies went in without removing their bonnets, and
+after dinner retired to their rooms.
+
+As I came out on the piazza, Fred, who was walking about in a restless
+way, puffing his cigar with a sort of ferocity, as though determined to
+put it through as speedily as possible, shouted, “Hello! Charlie, old
+boy, where the eternal furies have you been? Here I have been about this
+dead, sleepy, stupid place all the morning, with nothing to do and
+nobody to speak to!”
+
+“Why, where’s Mrs. M.?”
+
+“Lib? Oh, she’s been here, but then she was reading a ghastly stupid
+novel, and wasn’t company; and she went off to the big boarding-house
+down the road half a mile, to dine with a friend. I wouldn’t go to the
+blasted place, and really think she didn’t want me to. But where in
+thunder were you all the while?”
+
+“At church, to be sure, with my wife and her mother.”
+
+“Oh, yes!” was the reply, peculiarly prolonged, as if the idea never
+occurred to him before. “How long since you became so pious, old man?
+Didn’t suppose you knew what the inside of a church was used for. The
+outside is mainly useful to put a clock on, where it can be seen. Old
+Pink,—beg pardon! Mrs. Pinkerton,—I suppose, dragged you along by main
+force.”
+
+“Not at all. I went of my own motion; in fact, suggested it to the
+ladies.”
+
+“You don’t say so! Well, I see she is bringing you around. It is she
+that is destined to gain the supremacy.”
+
+“Pshaw! Is my going to church such an indication of submission? It
+wouldn’t do you any harm to go to church once in a while, Fred.”
+
+“Well, I don’t know about that,” he said, taking out his cigar, and
+stretching his feet to the top of the balustrade; “I don’t know about
+that. I am afraid it might be the ruin of me. I might become awfully
+pious, and then what a stick and a moping man of rags I should become. I
+tell you, Charlie, my boy, there’s many a good fellow spoilt by too
+much church and Sunday school.”
+
+“Perhaps,” I replied, “but you and I are beyond danger.”
+
+“Well, yes, but you can’t be too careful of yourself, you know.”
+
+There was no answering that, and we relapsed into commonplace, and
+finished our cigars.
+
+“Where’s old Dives to-day, and his charming niece, the lively Van?”
+asked Fred, after an uncommon fit of silent contemplation.
+
+“They went over to some town thirty or forty miles away, yesterday, and
+haven’t got back,” I replied.
+
+“I tell you, that girl knows how to circumvent these stupid Sundays,
+don’t she, though? And she takes old Dives along wherever she wants to
+go. I believe she would take him where the other Dives went, if she was
+disposed to take a trip there herself. But, holy Jerusalem! what are we
+to do to get through the rest of the day. No company, no billiards, no
+fishing. Confound the prejudices of society. I tell you, it is just such
+women as that mother-in-law of yours that keep society intimidated, as
+it were, into artificial proprieties. Now where’s the harm of a pleasant
+game on a Sunday, more than sitting here and grumbling and cursing
+because there’s nothing to do?”
+
+I made no reply, and Fred lighted another cigar. He was evidently
+thinking of something. “Look here, old fellow,” he said at length in an
+undertone, something very unusual with him, “come up to my room. You
+haven’t seen it. Lib won’t be back till teatime, and perhaps we can find
+something to amuse ourselves.”
+
+He led the way and I followed, thinking no harm. His room was up stairs
+and on the back of the house, looking up the great hill that stretched
+back to the clouds. As we entered, I found he had brought a good many
+things with him, and given the room much the air of the quarters of a
+bachelor in the city. His sleeping-room was separate from that, and
+formed a sort of boudoir for his wife. He motioned me to an easy-chair,
+set a box of fine cigars on the table, and going to the closet brought
+out a decanter of sherry and some glasses.
+
+“In these cursed places, you can get nothing to drink,” he said,
+“unless on the sly, and I hate that; so I bring along my own beverages,
+you see.”
+
+I saw and tasted, and found it very good. He was still fumbling about
+the closet, with profane ejaculations, and finally emerged with
+something in his hand that I at first took for a small book. But he
+unblushingly put on the table that pasteboard volume sometimes called
+the Devil’s Bible. “Come,” he said, “where’s the harm? Let us have a
+quiet game of Casino or California Jack, or something else. It is better
+than perishing of stupidity.”
+
+I demurred. I was not over-scrupulous, but I had sufficient of my early
+breeding left to have a qualm of conscience at the thought of playing
+cards on Sunday.
+
+“Oh, nonsense!” said Fred, carelessly, as he proceeded to deal the cards
+for Casino. “There, you have an ace and little Casino right before you.
+Go ahead, old man!”
+
+I made a feeble show of protesting, but took up my cards, and, finding
+that I could capture the ace and little Casino, took them. From that the
+play went on; I became quite absorbed, and dismissed my scruples, when,
+as the sun was getting low, a shadow passed the window.
+
+“Great Jupiter!” I exclaimed, looking up. “Does that second-story piazza
+go all the way round here?”
+
+“To be sure,” answered Fred, whose back was to the window. “Why not?
+What did you see,—a spook?”
+
+“My mother-in-law!”
+
+“The devil!”
+
+“No, Mrs. Pinkerton!”
+
+“Well, what do you care? You are your own boss, I hope.”
+
+“Yes, of course; but she will be terribly offended, and I think it would
+be pleasanter for all concerned to keep in her good graces.”
+
+“Gammon! Assert your rights, be master of yourself, and teach the old
+woman her place. D—— me, if I would have a mother-in-law riding over
+me, or prying around to see what I was about!”
+
+“Oh, I am sure she passed the window by accident. She would never pry
+around; it isn’t her style; she has a fine sense of propriety, has my
+mother-in-law!”
+
+“Oh, yes, old Pink is the pink of propriety, no doubt about that!” said
+the rascal, laughing heartily at his heartless pun.
+
+But I couldn’t laugh. I saw plainly enough that I had lost more than all
+the ground that I had gained in my mother-in-law’s favor, and my task
+would be harder than ever. I had no more desire to play cards, and
+sauntered down stairs and out of doors as if nothing had happened. At
+the tea-table Mrs. Pinkerton was very impressive in her manner, but
+showed no direct consciousness of anything new. On the piazza, after
+tea, she was uncommonly affable to her daughter, and, I thought, a
+little disposed to keep Bessie from talking to me. The latter appeared
+troubled somewhat, and looked at me in an anxious way, as if longing to
+rush into my arms and ask me all about it and say how willingly she
+forgave me; but her mother kept her within the circle of her influence,
+and I sat apart, harboring unutterable thoughts and saying nothing. At
+last Mrs. Pinkerton arose, and said sweetly, “I wouldn’t stay out any
+later, dear, it is rather damp.”
+
+“Stay with me, Bessie,” I said, “I want to speak to you. Your mother is
+at liberty to go in whenever she pleases.” It was then she gave me a
+disdainful look and swept in, and I muttered the wish regarding her
+transportation to a distant clime, which brought out the gentle rebuke
+with which this story opens.
+
+I saw no prospect of enjoying a longer stay at the Fairview, unless some
+burglary or terrible accident should occur to give me chance for a new
+display of my heroic qualities, and even then, I thought, it would be of
+no use, for I should spoil it all next day. So we determined to go home
+a week earlier than we had intended. The Marstons were going to Canada
+and Lake George, and wouldn’t reach home till October. Mr. Desmond and
+his niece stayed a month longer where they were, and that would bring
+them home about the same time. Bessie and I went home with a lack of
+that buoyant bliss with which we had travelled to the mountains and
+spent those first two weeks. There was no change in us, but it was all
+due to my mother-in-law.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+WHAT IS HOME WITHOUT A MOTHER-IN-LAW?
+
+
+Home! We were back from the mountains, and our brief wedding-journey had
+become a thing of the past. Mrs. Pinkerton’s iron-bound trunk had been
+reluctantly deposited in her bed-chamber by a puffing and surly
+hack-driver; and here was I, installed in the little cottage as head of
+the household, for weal or for woe. It was Mrs. Pinkerton’s cottage, to
+be sure, but I entered it with the determination not to live there as a
+boarder or as a guest subject to the proprietor’s condescending
+hospitality. I was able and not unwilling to establish a home of my own,
+and inasmuch as I refrained from doing so because of Mrs. Pinkerton’s
+desire to keep her daughter with her, I had the right to consider myself
+under no obligation to my mother-in-law.
+
+The cottage was far from being a disagreeable place in itself. It was
+small, but extremely neat and pleasant. The rooms were furnished with a
+degree of quiet taste that defied criticism. The hand of an accomplished
+housekeeper was everywhere made manifest, and everything had an air of
+refinement and comfort. There was no ostentatious furniture; the chairs
+were made to sit in, but not to put one’s boots on. The cleanliness of
+the house was terrible. One could see that no man had lived there since
+the death of the late Pinkerton.
+
+Our room was the same that had been occupied by Bessie since she was a
+school-girl in short frocks. It was full of Bessie’s “things,” and it
+was lucky that my effects occupied but very little space.
+
+“This is jolly,” I said, as I sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled
+a cigar from my pocket. “How soon will supper be ready, I wonder?”
+
+There was no response. Bessie was unpacking,—and such an unpacking!
+
+I lighted my cigar and threw myself back on the bed, wondering how they
+had got on without me at the bank. Presently in came mother-in-law to
+lend a hand at the unpacking. She did not see me at first, but the
+fragrance of my Manila soon reached her nostrils, and she turned.
+
+Such a look as she cast upon me! It almost took my breath away. But she
+did not say a word. “The subject is beyond her powers of speech,” I said
+to myself. “Let us hope it will be so as a general thing.”
+
+However, it made me feel uncomfortable, so by and by I got off the bed
+and went down stairs.
+
+At the supper-table I tried to make myself as agreeable as possible. I
+talked over the trip, and spoke of the people we had met at the
+mountains; but I had most of the conversation to myself. Bessie did not
+seem to be in a mood to chat; Mrs. Pinkerton devoted herself to impaling
+me with her eyes once in a while; in a word, the mental atmosphere was
+muggy.
+
+“Desmond has travelled a great deal,” I said. “I was speaking of French
+politics the other day, and he gave me a long harangue on the situation.
+He was in Paris several years, when he was a good deal younger than he
+is now.”
+
+“Mr. Desmond is not a very old man,” said Mrs. Pinkerton, “but he has
+passed that age when men think they know all there is to be known.”
+
+I accepted this shot good-naturedly, and laughed.
+
+“His niece is a remarkably bright girl,” I continued. “Don’t you think
+so?”
+
+“I cannot say I think it either bright or proper for a young lady to go
+off alone on mountain excursions for half a day, and return with her
+dress torn and her hands all scratched.”
+
+“Well, it was rather imprudent, but you know she said she had no
+intention of going so far when she started, and she missed her way.”
+
+“I did not hear her excuses. She appeared to be a spoiled child, and her
+manners were insufferably offensive. I should have known she came from
+New York, even if I had not been told.”
+
+“Do you think all New-Yorkers are loud?”
+
+“I said no such thing. There is a class of New York young people who are
+so ‘loud’ that respectable people cannot have anything to do with them
+without lowering themselves. Miss Van Duzen belongs to that class.”
+
+“You are rough on her, upon my word. I don’t think she’s half so bad,
+do you, Bessie?”
+
+“I liked her very much,” said Bessie. “She may not be our style exactly,
+but I think at heart she is a good, true girl.”
+
+“I wonder if she will call,” I said. “By the way, Fred Marston is coming
+out to see us as soon as he gets back to the city.”
+
+“As to that young man,” Mrs. Pinkerton remarked, with some show of
+vivacity, “he impressed me as being little less than disreputable.”
+
+“Disreputable! I would have you understand that Fred Marston is one of
+my friends,” I exclaimed, growing angry, “and he is as respectable as
+the rector of St. Thomas’s Church!”
+
+Phew! Now I had done it. Mrs. Pinkerton was thoroughly scandalized and
+offended. She got up, and we left the table, Bessie looking troubled. I
+went into the library, and after lighting a cigar, sat down to read the
+papers. Bessie, who had followed me, brushed the journal out of my hand
+and seated herself on my knee.
+
+“Charlie,” she said, kissing me, and smoothing the hair away from my
+brow, “can’t you and mamma ever get along any better than this?”
+
+“A conundrum! I never guessed one, so I shall have to give this up. But
+don’t you see how it is, dearest? I try to be good to her, and she won’t
+meet me half-way. On the contrary, she tries to nag me, I think. It
+wasn’t my fault to-night. What right has she to run down my friends? If
+she don’t like them, she might leave them alone, and be precious sure
+they’d leave her alone. She don’t like smoking; I tried to swear off,
+tried mighty hard, but it was no use. You see—”
+
+“It wasn’t quite necessary for you to make that remark about the Rev.
+Dr. McCanon, was it, Charlie?”
+
+“Well, no; I’m sorry, but she provoked me to it. I’ll apologize.”
+
+“And then, Charlie, you will try to be a little more patient with mamma,
+won’t you?”
+
+“Yes, I do try, but the trouble is that she don’t like me. Must I keep
+my mouth shut, throw away my cigars, bounce all my friends, and sit up
+with my arms folded?”
+
+“Oh, no, dear. Be good to her, and be patient; it will all come around
+right in time.”
+
+That was Bessie’s way of lightening present troubles,—“It will all come
+around right in time.” Blessed hope! “Man never is, but always to be
+blest.”
+
+My duties now kept me at the bank nearly all day, and for a few weeks
+affairs went on at home very smoothly. At table Mrs. Pinkerton
+maintained a sphinx-like silence, and I directed my conversation to
+Bessie. When the old lady opened her mouth, it was to snub me. The snub
+direct, the snub indirect, the snub implied, and the snub
+far-fetched,—I submitted to all with a cheerful spirit, and not a hasty
+retort escaped me.
+
+At Bessie’s request, I now smoked only in the library, or in our own
+room. I bought a highly ornamental Japanese affair, of curious
+workmanship, as a receptacle for cigar-ashes. Altogether, I behaved like
+a good boy.
+
+One evening Marston dropped in. When his card was brought up stairs, I
+handed it over to Bessie, and hurried to the library.
+
+“How are you, old man?” he said, or, rather, shouted. “How do you like
+it, as far as you’ve got?”
+
+“Tip-top. I’m glad to see you. When did you get back?”
+
+“Last Saturday, and mighty glad to get back to a live place, too.
+Smoke?”
+
+“Thank you. Bessie will be down in a minute.”
+
+“How’s old Pink?”
+
+“S-s-h! She’s all right. Don’t speak so confoundedly loud.”
+
+“Ha, ha! I see how it is. By and by you won’t dare say your soul’s your
+own. I pity you, Charlie, upon my word I do. Ned Tupney was married a
+few days ago, did you know it? and he’s got a devil of a mother-in-law
+on his hands, a regular roarer—”
+
+“Here comes my wife,” I broke in. “For Heaven’s sake, change the
+subject. Talk about roses!”
+
+Bessie entered and exchanged a friendly greeting with Fred.
+
+“I was telling Charlie about some wonderful roses I saw at Primton’s
+green-house,” said the unabashed visitor, and he forthwith laid aside
+his cigar—on the tablecloth!—and launched into a glowing description
+of the imaginary flowers.
+
+Before he had finished, Mrs. Pinkerton entered much to my surprise. She
+bowed in a stately manner, inquired formally as to the state of Fred’s
+health, and as she took a seat I saw her glance take in that cigar.
+
+Fred could talk exceedingly well when he was so disposed, and he
+entertained us excellently, I thought. He had seen a good deal of the
+world, was a close observer, and had the faculty of chatting in a
+fascinating way about subjects that would usually be called commonplace.
+He was pleased with the aspect of the cottage, and complimented it
+gracefully.
+
+“Love in a cottage,” he sighed, casting a quick glance around the
+room,—“well, it isn’t so bad after all, with plenty of books, a
+pleasant garden, sunny rooms, a pretty view, and a mother-in-law to look
+after a fellow and keep him straight.” And the wretch looked at Mrs.
+Pinkerton, and laughed in a sociable way.
+
+I promptly called his attention to a beautiful edition of Thackeray’s
+works in the bookcase, a recent purchase.
+
+In the course of a half-hour’s call, Fred managed to introduce the
+dangerous topic at least a half-dozen times, and each time I was
+compelled to choke him off by ramming some other subject down his throat
+willy-nilly.
+
+Finally he rose to go. I accompanied him to the front door.
+
+“Sociable creature, old Pink, eh?” he said. “Doesn’t love me too well.
+Is she always as festive and amusing as to-night?”
+
+“Hold on a minute,” was my reply. I ran back and got my hat and cane,
+and accompanied him toward the railroad station.
+
+“See here, Fred,” I said, “your intentions are good, but I wish you
+would quit talking about Mrs. Pinkerton. I am doing my best to live
+peaceably and comfortably in the same house with her, and you don’t help
+me a bit with your gabble. She is a very worthy woman, and not half so
+stupid as you imagine. I admit that we don’t get along together quite as
+I could wish, but I’m trying to please my wife by being as good a son
+as I can be to her mother. What’s the use of trying to rile up our
+little puddle?”
+
+“Oh, all right!” he rejoined. “If you prefer your puddle should be
+stagnant—admirable metaphor, by the way—it shall be as you wish. Only
+I hate to see the way things are going with you, and I’m bound to tell
+you so. You are losing your spirit, tying your hands, and throwing all
+your manly independence to the winds. If you live two years with that
+irreproachable mummy, you won’t be worth knowing. Do you dare go into
+town with me and have a game of billiards?”
+
+I went. We had several games. I got home about midnight. The next
+morning, at the breakfast-table, Mrs. Pinkerton said dryly,—
+
+“Your friend Marston pities you, doesn’t he?”
+
+“I don’t know; if he does, he wastes his emotions,” I replied.
+
+“I am glad you think so. He takes a good deal of interest in your
+welfare, and I suppose he could be prevailed upon to give you wise
+advice in case of need.”
+
+“I dare say. Fred is a good fellow, and advice is as cheap as dirt.”
+
+“And pity?”
+
+“Pity! Why do you think Fred pities me? Why should he pity me?”
+
+“Your question is hypocritical, because you know very well that he
+thinks you are a victim,—a victim of a terrible mother-in-law.”
+
+It was the first time she had ever spoken out so openly. I said,—
+
+“We will leave it to Bessie. Bessie, do I look like a victim?”
+
+“No,” said Bessie, “but you are both the queerest puzzles! Mamma is
+always her dearest self when you are away, Charlie. You don’t know each
+other at all yet. When you are together you are both horrid, and when
+you are apart you are both lovely. And yet I don’t know why it should be
+so; there is no quarrel between you—and—and—”
+
+And Bessie began to cry. I got up.
+
+“No, there’s no quarrel between us,” I said; “but perhaps a straight-out
+row would be better than forever to be eating our own vitals with
+suppressed rancor.”
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton made as if she would go around to where Bessie sat, to
+condole with her, without noticing my remark.
+
+“No, don’t trouble yourself,” I cried. “It’s my place to comfort my
+wife.” And I took Bessie in my arms tenderly, and kissed her
+tear-stained cheek almost fiercely.
+
+This theatrical demonstration caused my mother-in-law to sweep out of
+the room promptly, with her temper as nearly ruffled as I had ever seen
+it.
+
+“O Charlie!” whimpered my poor little wife despairingly, “what shall I
+do? It’s awful to have you and mamma this way!”
+
+And now it was my turn to say, “Cheer up, my love! It will all come
+around right in time.”
+
+But my _arrière pensée_ was, “Would that that burglar had bagged the old
+iceberg, and carried her off to her native Nova Zembla!”
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+MISS VAN’S PARTY AND ANOTHER UNPLEASANTNESS.
+
+
+One day in the early fall, Mrs. Pinkerton received a letter postmarked
+at Paris, which seemed to throw her into a state of extraordinary
+excitement. I knew her well enough to be certain that she would not tell
+me the news, but that I should hear it later through Bessie. Such was
+the case. When I came home towards evening and went up stairs to prepare
+for supper, Bessie, who was seated in our room, said in a joyful tone,—
+
+“George is coming home next month!”
+
+“That’s good,” I said; and the more I thought of it the better it
+seemed. A new element would be infused into our home life with his
+advent, and I confidently believed that the widow’s society would be
+vastly more tolerable when he was among us. George had been so long in
+Paris that he had become a veritable Parisian. That he would bring
+along with him a large amount of Paris sunshine and vivacity to enliven
+the atmosphere of our little circle, I felt certain.
+
+“Is he coming to stay?” I asked.
+
+“He don’t know. He says he never makes any plans for six months ahead.
+It will depend upon circumstances.”
+
+“Well, that’s Parisian. I’m very glad he’s coming, and I hope
+circumstances will keep him here. Isn’t old Dr. Jones pretty nearly
+dead? Seems to me George could take his practice.”
+
+“Now, Charlie!”
+
+“It’s all right, puss; doctors must die as well as their patients.”
+
+I broached the subject to mother-in-law at the supper-table,
+and—_mirabile dictu!_—she agreed with me that we must keep George with
+us when we got him.
+
+In November George arrived. He didn’t telegraph from New York, but came
+right on by a night train, and, walking into the house while we were at
+breakfast, took us by surprise.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton taken by surprise was a funny phenomenon, and I’m afraid
+propriety received a pretty smart blow when she threw her napkin into a
+plate of buckwheat cakes, dropped her eye-glasses, and rushed to meet
+the long-lost prodigal.
+
+As for George, he brought such a gale into the house with him—there are
+plenty of them on the Atlantic in November—that everything seemed
+metamorphosed. He laughed and shouted, and hugged first one of us and
+then another, and finally sat down and ate breakfast enough for six
+Frenchmen, every minute ripping out some wicked little French oath and
+winking at his mother with the utmost complacency. Never since I had
+become an inmate of the cottage had we enjoyed a meal so much as that
+one. There was an _abandon_, an _insouciance_, an _esprit_, a
+_je-ne-sais-quoi_ about this young frog-eater that thoroughly carried
+away the whole party, including even Mrs. Pinkerton.
+
+When George had eaten everything he could find on the table, he lighted
+a cigarette,—right there in the dining-room, too, and under his
+mother’s eyes,—and we had a good, long, jolly talk together, Bessie
+sitting between us and feasting her eyes on her brother’s comeliness.
+He certainly was handsome.
+
+“I have no plans,” he said, “except to loaf here awhile and wait for an
+opening.”
+
+“A French Micawber,” said I. “And I suppose you know all about medicine
+and surgery?”
+
+“I have learned when not to give medicine, I believe, and so, I think, I
+can save lots of lives.”
+
+A few days after George’s arrival we received a call from the Watsons. I
+had never had the pleasure of meeting the Watsons, but I had had the
+Watsons held up before me as examples of the right sort of style so many
+times, that I felt already well acquainted with them.
+
+Mr. Watson was a very retiring, quiet little man, awed into obscurity by
+his wife. After a long and persistent effort to interest him in
+conversation, I was compelled to give it up, and to leave him smiling
+blankly, with his gaze directed toward the Argand burner.
+
+Mrs. Watson was immense in every sense of the word. Her moral and mental
+dimensions were awe-inspiring; and she delivered what I afterwards
+found, on reflection, to be very commonplace utterances in a style in
+which unction, dogmatism, self-satisfaction, and finality were
+predominant. Once, when she had brought forth an unusually imposing
+sentence, her husband fairly smacked his lips.
+
+The Watsons had no children. They were among the most prominent
+attendants of St. Thomas’s, and the old gentleman was reputed to be
+worth about a million.
+
+George came in while the call was in progress, and after greeting the
+Watsons, he turned to Mrs. W., and uttered one of the most polished,
+delicate, pleasing little compliments it has ever been my fortune to
+hear uttered. Then he quietly withdrew into the background.
+
+Just then some more callers were announced, and what was my surprise to
+see Mr. Desmond and Miss Van Duzen enter. The former was as resplendent
+as to his watch-chain as ever, and his niece looked charming.
+Introductions all round followed, and the company broke up into groups.
+
+George took a seat near Miss Van, and a brisk fire of conversation was
+soon under way between them, varied by frequent bursts of friendly
+laughter.
+
+Mr. Desmond soon drew out Mr. Watson, and their talk was on stocks,
+bonds, and the like.
+
+After Mrs. Watson had proved her theory of the laws of the universe, and
+had almost intoxicated my worthy mother-in-law with her glittering
+rhetoric, the Watsons took their departure. Before the others followed
+their example, Miss Van extended an informal invitation to us to attend
+a “social gathering” at her uncle’s residence the following Wednesday
+evening.
+
+We went, of course, Mrs. Pinkerton, George, Bessie, and I. It was a
+pleasant party, and it could not have been otherwise with Miss Van as
+the hostess. There was a little dancing,—not enough to entitle it to be
+called a dancing-party; a little card-playing,—not enough to make it a
+card-party; and there was a vast amount of bright and pleasant
+conversation, but still one could not name it a _converzatione_. The
+company was remarkably good, and Miss Van’s management, although
+imperceptible, was so skilful that her guests found themselves at their
+ease, and enjoying themselves, without knowing that their pleasure was
+more than half due to her _finesse_.
+
+George was quite a lion, and I envied his easy tact, his unconscious
+grace of manner, and his faculty of saying bright things without effort.
+He and Miss Van got on famously together, and she found him an efficient
+and trustworthy aid in her capacity as hostess.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton made a lovely wall-flower, and I could not refrain from a
+wicked chuckle when I saw her sitting on a sofa, exchanging commonplaces
+with a puffing dowager. Presently, however, I noticed that she had gone,
+and I found that Mr. Desmond had been kind enough to relieve me from the
+onerous duty of taking her down to supper.
+
+I wish I had a printed bill of fare of that supper, for even George,
+fresh from Véfour’s and the Trois Frères Provençaux, acknowledged that
+it was sublime, magnificent, perfect. We men folks, in fact, talked so
+much about it afterwards, that Bessie rebuked us by remarking that “men
+didn’t care about anything so much as eating.”
+
+As Fred Marston remarked to me, while helping himself a third time to
+the salad, “It’s a stunning old lay-out, isn’t it!” His wife was there,
+dressed “to kill,” as he himself said, and dancing with every gentleman
+she could decoy into asking her.
+
+After we had come up from the supper-room, Fred Marston pulled me into a
+corner, and inflicted on me a volley of stinging observations about the
+people in the room. George, Bessie, Mrs. Pinkerton, and Miss Van were, I
+supposed, in one of the other rooms; I had lost sight of them.
+
+“Old Jenks lost a cool hundred thousand fighting the tiger at Saratoga,
+this last summer,” said Fred. “I had it from a man who backed him. Do
+you know that young widow talking with him near the end of the piano?
+No? Why, that’s Mrs. Delascelles, and a devil of a little piece she
+is,—twice divorced and once widowed, and she isn’t a day over
+twenty-five. You ought to know her. By the way, that brother of yours is
+a whole team, with a bull-pup under the wagon. Does he let old Pink boss
+him around as she does you?”
+
+“It’s a fine night,” I said.
+
+“Delightful! I say, Charlie, it must be a terrible bore to lug the old
+woman around to all these shindigs with you, hey?”
+
+“What do you think about the State election?” I demanded.
+
+“The Republicans have got a dead sure thing, I’ll lay you a V. She has
+bulldozed you till you don’t dare open your head, my boy. Yours is one
+of the saddest and most malignant cases of mother-in-law I ever struck.”
+
+“Fred,” I said, in hopes of bringing his tirade to an end, “your
+friendship is slightly oppressive. Confine your attentions to your own
+grievances. I will take care of mine.”
+
+“Ah! at last you acknowledge that you have one. Confess, now, that old
+Pink is a confounded nuisance!”
+
+“Well, then, yes, she is! Does that satisfy you, scandal-monger? Now,
+for Heaven’s sake, shut up!”
+
+I heard a brisk rustling of silk just at my left and a little back of
+where I sat, and some one passed toward the front parlor.
+
+“By Jove!” ejaculated Fred, looking intently. “It’s old Pink herself,
+and I hope she got the benefit of what we said about her. I had no idea
+she was sitting near us.”
+
+“What _we_ said about her!” I repeated. “I didn’t say anything about
+her.”
+
+“Yes, you did. Ha, ha! You said she was a confounded nuisance!”
+
+I shuddered.
+
+“Oh, well, brace up! Perhaps she didn’t hear that impious remark,” said
+Fred, chuckling maliciously. “Or if she did, perhaps she’ll let you off
+easy: only a few hours in the dark closet, or bread and water for a day
+or two.”
+
+“Confound your mischief-making tongue!” I growled. “Here comes Miss Van
+Duzen to bid you quit spreading scandal about her guests.”
+
+Miss Van Duzen, on the contrary, only wished Mr. Marston to secure a
+partner for the Lanciers, which he promptly did.
+
+I sat brooding while the dancing went on, and was somewhat astonished,
+when it was over, to see George making for my corner.
+
+“How’s this?” he said. “Didn’t you go home with them?”
+
+“With them? What! You don’t mean to say—”
+
+“But I do, though! Bessie and mother made their adieux half an hour
+ago, and I thought of course you had gone home with them, as nothing was
+said to me. This is a pretty go! Bessie must have been ill.”
+
+“Nonsense!” I exclaimed. “I should have known if that was the case.
+Where’s Miss Van?”
+
+“I saw her. She thought it was odd, but supposed you had gone with them.
+What could have started them off in that fashion?”
+
+“Well, well, don’t let’s stand here talking. Come on.”
+
+We did not stop for ceremony. Rushing up stairs, we donned our hats and
+coats, and made our way out to the sidewalk without losing any time. I
+hailed a carriage, and we drove rapidly out of town. It was about half
+past one o’clock when we arrived home. There were lights in our room and
+in Mrs. Pinkerton’s chamber. George followed me up stairs, and I tapped
+at the door of our room.
+
+“Is it you, Charlie?” said Bessie’s voice.
+
+“Yes,—and George.”
+
+She opened the door. It was evidently not long since their arrival
+home, for she had not begun to undress.
+
+“Explain, for our benefit, the new method of leaving a party,” said
+George, “and why it was deemed necessary to give us a scare in
+inaugurating the same.” He threw himself into an easy-chair.
+
+“Perhaps Mr. Travers is better able to tell you why mother should have
+left in the way she did,” said Bessie, trying to make her speech sound
+sarcastic and cutting, but finding it a difficult job, with her breath
+coming and going so quickly.
+
+“The deuce he is!” roared George. “Come, Charlie, what have you been up
+to? I must get it out of some of you.”
+
+“I am utterly unable to tell you why your mother should have left in the
+way she did,” was all I could find to say.
+
+“Sapristi! This is getting mysterious and blood-curdling. The latest
+_feuilleton_ is nothing to it. Must I go to bed without knowing the
+cause of this escapade? Well, so be it. But let me tell you, young
+woman, that it wasn’t the thing to do. If you find your husband flirting
+with some siren, you must lead him off by the ear next time, but don’t
+sulk. Good night.”
+
+George walked out and shut the door after him.
+
+“See here, Bessie,” I said kindly, “don’t cry, because I want to talk
+sensibly with you.”
+
+She was sobbing now in good earnest.
+
+“I want you to tell me what your mother said to you about me.”
+
+She couldn’t talk just then, poor little woman! But when she had had her
+cry partly out, she told me.
+
+Her mother had not told her a word of what had passed between Fred
+Marston and me! The outraged dignity of the widow would not admit of an
+explicit account of the unspeakable insult she had received. She had
+simply given Bessie to understand that I had uttered some unpardonable,
+infamous slander, and had hustled the poor girl breathlessly into a cab
+and away, before she fairly realized what had happened.
+
+I then told Bessie what our conversation had been, and left her to judge
+for herself. I had not the heart to scold her for her part in the French
+leave-taking, though it made me feel miserable to think how few
+episodes of such a sort might bring about endless misunderstandings and
+heart-aches.
+
+Of course more or less talk was caused by the mysterious manner of our
+several departures from Miss Van’s party; and, thanks to Fred Marston
+and his wife and similar rattle-pates, it became generally known that
+there was a skeleton in the Pinkerton closet.
+
+Miss Van soon heard how it came about, and nothing could have afforded a
+more complete proof of her refinement of character than the delicacy and
+tact with which she ignored the whole affair.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII.
+
+ANOTHER CHARLIE IN THE FIELD.
+
+
+The winter, with its petty trials and contentions, had gone by; spring,
+with its bloom and fragrance, was far advanced; and already another
+summer, with its possible pleasures and recreations, was close upon us.
+Before it had fairly set in, however, an event of extraordinary
+importance was to occur in our little household. There had been
+premonitions of it for some time, which had a tendency to soften and
+soothe all asperities, and cause a rather sober and subdued air to
+pervade the little cottage, and now there were active preparations going
+on. Of course, the widow was gradually assuming the management of the
+whole affair, and it was a matter in which I could hardly venture to
+dispute her right. Her experience and knowledge were certainly superior
+to mine, and it was an affair in which these qualities were very
+important. In fact, I seemed to be counted out altogether in the
+preparations, as if it was something in the nature of a surprise party
+in my honor. Mrs. Pinkerton had an air of mysterious and exclusive
+knowledge concerning the grand event. Miss Van, who had come to have
+confidential relations with Bessie, of the most intimate kind,
+notwithstanding the mother’s objections, knew all about it, but had a
+queer way of appearing unconscious of anything unusual. There seemed to
+be a general consent to a shallow pretence that I was in utter and
+hopeless ignorance. It annoyed me a little, as I flattered myself that I
+knew quite as much about what was coming as any of them, and I thought
+it silly to make believe I didn’t, and to ignore my interest in the
+affair. Bessie had no secrets from me, of course, and our understanding
+was complete, but one might have thought from appearances that we had
+less concern in the matter than anybody else.
+
+As the auspicious time drew near, the goings-on increased in mystery and
+the widow’s control grew more and more complete. Bessie showed me one
+day a wardrobe that amused me immensely. It was quite astonishing in
+its extent and variety, but so liliputian in the dimensions of the
+separate garments as to seem ridiculous to me.
+
+“Aren’t they cunning?” said the dear girl, holding up one after another
+of the various articles of raiment. Then she showed me a basket,
+marvellously constructed, with a mere skeleton of wicker-work and
+coverings of pink silk and fine lace, and furnished with toilet
+appliances that seemed to belong to a fairy; and finally, removing a big
+quilt that had excited my curiosity, she showed me the most startling
+object of all,—a cradle! I had seen such things before and felt no
+particular thrill, but this had a strange effect upon me. I didn’t stop
+to inquire how these things had all been smuggled into the house without
+my knowledge or consent, but kissed my little wife fondly, and went down
+stairs in a musing and pensive mood.
+
+The next day a decree of virtual exile was pronounced upon me. My
+mother-in-law thought perhaps it would be better if I would occupy
+another room in the house for a time, and let her share Bessie’s
+chamber. The poor, dear girl might need her care at any time, and the
+widow looked at me as much as to say, “You cannot be expected to know
+anything about these matters, and have nothing to do but obey my
+directions.” I consented without a murmur or the least show of
+resistance, for I admitted everything that could possibly be said, and
+lost all my spirit of independence in view of the impressive event that
+was coming. So I meekly took to the attic, and put up with the most
+forlorn and desolate quarters. One or two mornings after, I was aroused
+at an inhuman hour, and ordered in the most imperative tones to call in
+Dr. Lyman as quickly as possible, and haste after Mrs. Sweet. I hurried
+into my clothes in the utmost agitation, raced down the street in a
+manner that led a watchful policeman to stop me and inquire my business,
+rung up the doctor with the most unbecoming violence, and delivered my
+errand up a speaking-tube, in answer to his muffled, “What’s wanted?”
+Then I rushed to the neighboring stable, and got up the sleepy hostler
+with as much vehemence in my manner as if he were in danger of being
+burned to death, and induced him to harness a team, in what I
+considered about twice the necessary length of time; drove three miles
+in the morning twilight for Mrs. Sweet, a motherly old maid in the
+nursing business, who had officiated at Bessie’s own _début_ upon the
+stage of life. When I had got back and returned the team to the stable,
+and was walking about the lower rooms in a restless manner, feeling as
+if I had suddenly become a hopeless outcast, the doctor came down
+stairs, and said, with amazing calmness, as though it was the most
+commonplace thing in the world,—
+
+“Getting on nicely. Fine boy, sir! Mrs. Travers is quite comfortable.
+Will look in again in the course of the morning.”
+
+Then I was left alone again, an outcast and a wanderer in my own home.
+All the life was up stairs, including the wee bit of new life that had
+come to venture upon the perils and vicissitudes of the great world. It
+was two hours, but it seemed a month, before any one relieved my
+solitude, and then it was at Bessie’s interposition—in fact, a command
+that she had to insist upon until her mother was afraid of her getting
+excited—that I was admitted to behold the mysteries above.
+
+Well, it is nobody’s business about the particulars of that chamber. It
+was too sacred for description; but there was the tiny, quivering, red
+new-comer, already dressed in some of the dainty liliputian garments,
+and very much astonished and not altogether pleased at the effect.
+Bessie was proud and happy, the nurse, moving about silently, knew just
+what to do and how to do it, and the mother-in-law held supreme command.
+She was grand and severe, and evidently her wishes had been disregarded
+in respect to the sex of her grandchild. She feared the consequences of
+another Charlie launched into a world already too degenerate, and she
+had hoped for an addition to the superior sex. But Bessie and I were
+mightily pleased that it was a boy.
+
+There was little to be said then, but in a few days the restraint began
+to be relaxed, and discussions arose about what had become the most
+important member of the household. Even the widow must be content with
+the second place now, but I began to have misgivings lest my position
+had been permanently fixed as the third. In my secret mind, however, I
+determined to assert my rights as soon as Bessie was strong again, and
+reduce my mother-in-law to the position in which she belonged. I had put
+off doing it too long, and advantage might be taken of the present
+juncture of affairs to strengthen her claim to supremacy, and it really
+wouldn’t do to delay much longer.
+
+“I think he looks just like Charlie,” said Bessie to Miss Van, the first
+time the latter called after the great event.
+
+“Well, I don’t know,” was the reply. “It seems to me he has his papa’s
+dark eyes, but I can’t see any other resemblance.”
+
+“Oh, I do!” Bessie replied with spirit. “Why, it is just his forehead
+and mouth, and his hair will be just the same beautiful brown when he
+grows up.”
+
+The old lady was looking on reproachfully, and finally said, “Bessie, my
+dear, that child looks precisely like your own family. George at his age
+was just such an infant; you couldn’t tell them apart.”
+
+George entered the room at that moment, and with his boisterous laugh
+said, “You don’t mean to say that I was ever such a little, soft,
+ridiculous lump of humanity as that, do you?”
+
+“As like as two peas,” was the reply of his mother.
+
+For my part I kept out of the discussion, for I must confess I could see
+no resemblance between the precious baby and any other mortal creature,
+except another baby of the same age. I thought they looked pretty much
+all alike, and was not prepared to deny that it was the exact
+counterpart of anybody at that particular stage of development.
+
+“I tell you what, Bess,” said George, after the debate had fully
+subsided, “you must name that little chap for me.”
+
+“Oh, no,” replied the proud mother, “that is all settled; his name is
+Charlie.”
+
+Nothing had been said on the subject before, and I was a little startled
+at Bessie’s positive manner, for I thought even this matter would not be
+free from her mother’s dictation. The old lady seemed surprised and
+vexed. “George is a much better name, I think,” she said very quietly,
+keeping down her vexation, “but I thought perhaps you might remember
+your dear father in this matter. His name, you know, was Benjamin.”
+
+“Yes, I know,” said Bessie, very firmly, “but I think there is one with
+a still higher claim, and the child’s name is Charles.”
+
+“Good for you, little girl!” I thought, but I said nothing. Within me I
+felt a gleeful satisfaction at Bessie’s spirit, which showed that if it
+ever came to a sharp contest with her mother, nothing could keep her
+from holding her own place by her husband’s side. All my misgivings
+about her possible estrangement by her mother’s influence vanished, and
+I saw that the new tie between us would be stronger than any earthly
+power.
+
+“Well,” said George abruptly, after a pause, “I wouldn’t be so
+disobliging about a little thing like that.”
+
+“Ah! you wait until you can afford the opportunity of furnishing names,
+and see what you will do,” I said jokingly. My joke was not generally
+appreciated. The widow gave me a look a little short of savage. Bessie
+suppressed a smile, in order to give me a reproof with her eyes, and
+Miss Van just then thought of something wholly irrelevant to say, as if
+she had not noticed my remark at all. On the whole, I was made to feel
+that it was a disgraceful failure.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX.
+
+THE SHADOW ON OUR LIFE.
+
+
+Another summer with all its glory was upon us. It was nearly a year
+since we were married, and I was beginning to feel the dignity of a
+family man. As Bessie regained her strength and bloom, she seemed to
+have a matronly grace and self-command quite new to her. As I looked
+back over our married life I saw no dark shadows, no coldness between us
+two, no misunderstandings that need occasion regret, but somehow it
+seemed as though that year had not been so bright and happy as it ought
+to have been. We had lived under an irksome restraint that was
+depressing. I had felt it more than Bessie, for she had been accustomed
+to submit to her mother, and did not chafe, but she plainly saw that my
+life had not that blithesomeness that would have been natural to me, and
+which she would have been glad to give it.
+
+It was the presence and influence of the mother-in-law that gave a
+chill to my home life, and yet I could accuse the good woman of no
+special offence. She was no vulgar meddler, and never wished or intended
+to mar our domestic felicity. She had managed to keep control of our
+household arrangements and we had passively acquiesced, but I felt that
+it would be better if Bessie would take command and cater more to our
+own desires. We could then have things our own way, and her position
+would be more becoming as the lady of the house. She began to regard it
+in the same light herself. Our social life, too, had been restrained and
+restricted. I was very fond of having my friends about me, and wished
+them to come in for the evening or to dinner or to pass a Sunday
+afternoon in our little bower, as often as they could find it agreeable.
+Mrs. Pinkerton made no open objections, but I knew the company of my
+friends was not congenial to her, and so was reluctant and backward in
+my invitations to them. Besides, they were apt to be chilled and
+disconcerted by the widow’s stately presence and rebuking ways, and were
+disinclined to make themselves quite at home with us. Fred Marston and
+his wife had been quite driven away. Mrs. Pinkerton had declined to
+speak to the latter, and had told the former in plain terms that he used
+language of which no gentleman would be guilty.
+
+“By thunder!” roared the impulsive fellow, “I’ll have you to understand
+that my wife and I are just as good as you, with your cursed airs of
+superiority!” and he stormed out of doors, and incontinently returned to
+town. When I met him afterwards he condescendingly declared that he
+didn’t blame me, except that I ought to be a man and not allow “old
+Pink” to insult my guests. I did not particularly regret his
+discontinuing his visits, for, to tell the truth, I did not like his
+manners, and he had drifted into a circle and among associates not at
+all to my taste, but it galled me to have any one whom I chose to
+entertain driven out of my house.
+
+I think nothing saved our charming friend, Miss Van Duzen, to whom we
+had both become greatly attached, from being gracefully snubbed and
+insulted, except the presence of her uncle, whenever she came out to
+visit us in the evening. Mr. Desmond’s indisputable social rank, his
+unimpeachable demeanor as a gentleman, and the dignity and
+impressiveness of his presence, though it could by no means overawe my
+mother-in-law, made it impossible even for her to give him an affront.
+Besides, she seemed to have a real respect for that fine old gentleman.
+She would doubtless have thought better of him if he had been a regular
+attendant at St. Thomas’s Church, but she could not learn that he was
+very constant at any sanctuary. His views were decidedly what are called
+liberal, and yet he was very considerate of the religious beliefs and
+practices of others, and would cheerfully acknowledge the worthy aims
+and good works of all the different Christian denominations. He seemed
+to understand why other persons should choose to join one or another,
+while he preferred to stand aloof, have his own ways of thinking, and do
+whatever good he might in his own way. He had large business interests
+and great wealth, and though he maintained his mansion in the city in
+great elegance, his family expenses were comparatively small, and he was
+reputed to make it up fully by supporting more than one poor family in
+a quiet way. He was liberal in his conduct as well as his belief, and
+his character and habits were above the reproach of the severest critic.
+Hence it was that the widow was forced to respect at least this one of
+our visitors, and to treat his niece with common civility, though
+cordiality was out of the question.
+
+In fact, we owed to Mr. Desmond not a little for what relief we obtained
+in our social life from the chilling restraints of the mother-in-law’s
+presence. He seemed to take a real pleasure in coming out to our little
+snuggery. His stately establishment in town could not be very home-like.
+His niece presided over it with great skill, and saw that every wish or
+taste of his was gratified. She could always entertain him with her
+sprightly wit, and their social occasions were among the most elegant in
+the city. He had his club to go to, which furnished every means that
+ingenuity and lavish resources could contrive to minister to the
+pleasures of man. And yet, there was wanting to his life that element
+that was the essence of home. He had longed for it when he was young,
+and had provided for it in his household; but the wife of his youth had
+been called from him early, and he had vainly tried to fill all his life
+with business, with silent works of charity, with elegance and profusion
+in his house, with his clubs, his studies, and his travels; but still
+there was a void, and when he came to visit us, he seemed to find
+something akin to the home feeling in our little circle. So he came far
+oftener than was to be expected of one in his position. Clara was his
+excuse, but it was plain to see that he liked to come on his own
+account, and he made himself very agreeable to us all; and when he came,
+we noticed the chilling influence of Mrs. Pinkerton much less than when
+he was not there.
+
+Sometimes we had a whist party. It was generally Bessie and I against
+Clara and George, but the widow had no objection to whist and was
+occasionally induced to take a hand, while Mr. Desmond was quite fond of
+the game and was a consummate player. When we young people made up the
+set, Mr. Desmond would converse with the widow, for though reticent
+where politeness did not call upon him to talk, he was incapable of the
+rudeness of sitting silent with one other person, or in a small party
+of intimate friends; and these conversations, showing his wide
+information on all manner of subjects, his sympathy with all charitable
+movements, and his tolerant regard even for the widow’s pet ideas on
+church and society, evidently increased her respect for him.
+
+George must not be forgotten as a member of our circle, and never can be
+by those who were in it. His vivacity did much to relieve us from the
+depression that brooded over us. He and Clara Van, as he had taken to
+calling her as a sort of play upon caravan,—for was she not a whole
+team in herself? he would say,—he and Clara had many a lively contest
+of words, and were well matched in their powers of wit and repartee.
+
+Thus there were lights as well as shades, relief as well as depression,
+in our social life, but over it all was a shadow, the shadow of my
+mother-in-law.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X.
+
+MY MOTHER-IN-LAW SUBDUED.
+
+
+As I was saying, I made up my mind that our happiness was marred by
+habitual submission to mother-in-law, and I determined to shake off the
+nightmare, to assert myself, and to reduce that stately crown of gray
+puffs to a subordinate place. How was I to do it? There was nothing that
+I could make the cause of direct complaint, and it was hard to get into
+a downright conflict which would involve plain speaking. I consulted
+with Bessie, and she agreed with me, and promised to assume the
+direction of household affairs. She did not like to hurt her mother’s
+feelings, but she admitted that it was best for her to be mistress. I
+could but admire the matronly firmness and tact with which she played
+her part. She gave her orders and told her mother what she proposed to
+do, and then proceeded to execute it as if there was no room for
+question. If opposition was made, she very quietly and firmly insisted.
+Her mother was astonished and had some warm words, in which she accused
+me of trying to set her daughter against her.
+
+“Oh, no,” said Bessie, “Charlie does not wish to set me against you or
+to have you made unhappy, but he thinks it better that I should be the
+mistress here, and I quite agree with him, and propose henceforth to be
+the mistress.”
+
+The widow was not offended, but hurt. She had too much good sense not to
+see the propriety of our decision, and she surrendered and tried not to
+appear affected.
+
+This was the first victory. Another time, at the table, she had
+exercised her prescriptive right of extinguishing me for some remark of
+which she did not approve. I fired up and remarked, “I have the right to
+speak my own opinion in my own house, Mrs. Pinkerton.”
+
+“Certainly you have a right to speak your own opinion in your own
+house,” she replied, with the least little sarcastic emphasis on “your
+own house,” which cut me to the quick.
+
+“But you don’t seem to think so,” I said. “You have had a way of
+snubbing me and putting me down which I don’t propose to tolerate any
+longer. I am master of my own conduct and of my own household, and I
+hope, in future, that my liberty may not be interfered with.”
+
+The widow’s lip quivered, her great eyes moistened, and she left the
+table, not because she was offended, but to hide her injured feelings. I
+felt mean, and would have apologized, but that I felt that my cause was
+at stake. There was no after-explanation. My mother-in-law came and went
+about the house as usual, calm and polite. A silly woman would have
+refused to speak to me for some weeks; but she was not a silly woman,
+and took pains to speak with the most studied politeness, and to avoid
+offence. Here, too, she had evidently surrendered.
+
+This was victory number two. One more and the battle was won. It was a
+Sunday in June. I had especially invited Mr. Desmond and his niece to
+come out to dinner and to spend the afternoon, and had insisted to Fred
+Marston that he should come with his wife. I wanted to vindicate my
+right to have what friends I pleased, and then I didn’t care overmuch if
+I never saw him again. Mrs. Pinkerton had gone to church alone as usual.
+For some weeks Bessie had been unable to accompany her, and I preferred
+the sanctuary at which the scholarly, but heterodox, Mr. Freeman
+preached. When she returned, our guests had arrived. She put on her
+eye-glasses as she entered the gate, and looked about with evident
+disapproval, as we were scattered over the lawn. She did not believe in
+Sunday visits. She was even stiff and distant to Mr. Desmond, and
+refused to see the Marstons at all, though they were directly before her
+eyes. She walked straight into the house.
+
+“By Jove,” said George to me in an undertone, “that isn’t right! I shall
+speak to mother about cutting your guests in that way.”
+
+“Never mind,” I replied, “don’t you say a word; I want an opportunity.”
+
+He saw it in a minute, and acquiesced with a queer smile. He fully
+sympathized with me, and had even encouraged me in the work of
+emancipation. He had the utmost respect and affection for his mother,
+but he said it was not right for her to make my home unpleasant.
+
+That Sunday Mrs. Pinkerton joined us at the dinner-table. I knew she
+would not be guilty of the incivility of staying away.
+
+“You remember my friends, Mr. and Mrs. Marston?” I said, by way of
+introduction, as she came in.
+
+“I remember them very well,” was the reply; “too well,” the tone
+implied. I made a special effort to be talkative, and to keep others
+talking during the dinner. It was very hard work, and I met with
+indifferent success. It was not a pleasant dinner. Mr. Desmond alone
+appeared not to mind the restraint, and he alone ventured to address the
+widow. She was polite, but far from sociable. We contrived to pass the
+afternoon tolerably, but not at all in the spirit which I wished to have
+prevail when I had friends to visit me, and all because of that
+presence.
+
+After they were gone, I took occasion to introduce the subject, for I
+had learned that Mrs. Pinkerton’s skill in expressing her disapproval in
+her manner was so great that she relied on it almost altogether, and
+rarely resorted to words for the purpose.
+
+“I am afraid you did not enjoy the company very much to-day,” I said, as
+we were sitting in the little parlor, overlooking an exquisite flower
+garden.
+
+“No, sir,” she answered, with the old emphasis on the “sir.” “I do not
+approve of company on the Sabbath, and I had hoped you would never again
+bring those Marstons into my presence at any time.”
+
+“Excuse me, madam; but I propose to be my own judge of whom I shall
+invite to visit me, and of the time and occasion. I presume you admit my
+right to do so.”
+
+“Certainly, sir. I never disputed it, and had no intention of saying
+anything if you had not introduced the subject.”
+
+“I introduced the subject for the very purpose; in fact, I brought out
+the company for the very purpose of vindicating my right, and it would
+be very gratifying to me if you would concede it cheerfully, and not, by
+your manner and way of treating my friends, interfere with it
+hereafter.”
+
+I was almost astonished at my own courage and spirit, and still more so
+at Mrs. Pinkerton’s reply. It was dusky and I could not see her face,
+but her voice trembled and choked as she answered,—
+
+“God knows I do not wish to interfere with your happiness. Bessie’s
+happiness has been my one thought for years, and now it is bound up with
+yours. I have my own notions, which I cannot easily discard, but I would
+not do or say anything that would mar your enjoyment for the world. I
+have long felt that I did do so, and have made up my mind to make any
+sacrifice of pride and inclination to avoid it.”
+
+Here she actually broke down and sobbed, and I was very near joining
+her. “Never mind,” I said at length, quite softened; “I guess we shall
+get along pleasantly together in the future, now that we have an
+understanding.”
+
+“I hope so,” she said, recovering her serenity, and we relapsed into a
+painful silence.
+
+This was the third and final victory, but I felt no elation over it. My
+mother-in-law receded somewhat into the background, but it was so much
+in sorrow, rather than anger, that I felt her new mood almost as
+depressing as the old. I didn’t want her to feel injured or subdued, but
+evidently she couldn’t help it, and the mother-in-law, though conquered,
+was herself still, and that congeniality that would make our life
+together wholly pleasant was impossible. Her existence was still a
+shadow, less chilling and more pensive, but a shadow in our home, and it
+seemed destined to stay there.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI.
+
+GEORGE’S NEW DEPARTURE.
+
+
+“George is growing very restless. I don’t know what ails him,” Bessie
+said to me.
+
+“I can guess,” I said, looking wise.
+
+“What is it?”
+
+“Do you remember what an uneasy, good-for-nothing chap one Charlie
+Travers was, when he first began to call on a certain young woman with
+conspicuous regularity?”
+
+“O Charlie, you don’t think he—”
+
+“No, no! Now don’t explode too suddenly. I wouldn’t have him know that I
+suspect anything for the world. We won’t name any names, but I keep my
+eyes about me, and I flatter myself I know the symptoms.”
+
+And with these mysterious words, I started for the bank, leaving to
+Bessie a new and delightful subject for speculation and air-castle
+building.
+
+George did not come home to supper that day, but that was nothing
+extraordinary. I was sitting out on the porch, smoking after the meal,
+and saw him coming up the street.
+
+“Where have you been?” I asked, as he joined me and took a seat.
+
+“None of your business. In town.”
+
+“Is Miss Van well?” I asked mischievously.
+
+“How should I know?”
+
+“Come, George, you don’t play the part of Innocence over well. Suppose
+you try Candor, and tell me where you have been.”
+
+“You mistake my identity. I’m not your baby. You will find the youthful
+Charlie entertaining his mother up stairs.”
+
+A long-drawn-out, agonized wail, proceeding from the regions above,
+showed how Bessie was being entertained.
+
+“No opening yet?” I ventured to ask, changing the subject.
+
+“Not the slightest prospect. If some of these doctors could only be
+inveigled into taking some of their own prescriptions! But no; they are
+too wise.”
+
+“The bitterness of your tone would seem to indicate that you have not
+enjoyed your visit to the town.”
+
+“The town be hanged, and the country too! Let’s take a walk down the
+street. Give me a cigar, confound you! How hot it is!”
+
+We strolled down the street.
+
+“This is a terrible vale of tears, this world,” said I. “The world is
+hollow, and my doll is stuffed with sawdust, which accounts for his
+howling.”
+
+George was silent. He pulled at his cigar ferociously, smoked it half
+up, threw it away, and replaced it by a cigarette.
+
+“When a man throws away the best part of a Reina Victoria he is either
+flush or badly in love,” said I to myself. I waited patiently for him to
+speak, as I was perfectly willing to receive his confidence, but I
+didn’t have the chance. He maintained a loud silence all the way, and we
+walked back home as we had gone out.
+
+“Something’s up—something serious,” I informed Bessie that night, “but
+George does not confide in me worth a cent, which I think is a little
+unbrotherly.”
+
+The following day George was absent from an early hour in the afternoon
+till long after all the household were fast asleep at night. I was
+awakened at about midnight by a light tapping at the door of our room,
+and slipped out of bed without disturbing Bessie or the baby.
+
+“Come up to my den!” whispered George, as I opened the door. “Don’t wake
+the others.”
+
+I quietly got into my clothes and crawled noiselessly up to George’s
+“den,” devoured by curiosity. The moment I caught sight of his handsome
+face I saw that it was all right with him, and that he had nothing but
+good news to tell me. We sat down, hoisted our heels to a comfortable
+altitude, and George told his story. I let him tell it himself here:—
+
+“I was feeling terribly blue yesterday, when you saw me,” he began, “as
+you could see. In the afternoon I went into town, and, according to a
+previous arrangement, hired a horse and buggy and called to take her out
+riding.”
+
+(Of course “her” was Miss Van.)
+
+“We had agreed to take the old Linwood road, and follow it to the
+village, returning through the Maplewood Park and so getting back to the
+city at about six. We left the town and passed through the suburbs
+rapidly, until we struck into the country, and there I let the horse go
+his own pace, which was slow. So much the better. Miss Van Duzen was
+never more charming. We had the most agreeable bit of talk, and she drew
+me out till I amazed myself. She always does. It’s no use my telling
+you, Charlie, but I have been a fool in my love for her ever since the
+night she came into this cottage like a stray beam of sunshine on a
+cloudy day. My heart went out of my keeping the night she called here
+with the old gentleman. I believe it was her freshness, her moral
+purity, that acted on my morbid, half _blasé_ spirit, like a tonic, and
+brought me on my feet. I’m talking random nonsense, you say, but why
+shouldn’t I? I’m drunk with love. Don’t laugh at me. I’ll be all right
+by daylight, except a headache. We got to talking about ourselves.
+Lovers always do, don’t they? You ought to know. There doesn’t seem to
+be much else in the world worth talking about. I told her all about
+myself,—my past, with its good and bad points, and my present hopes and
+purposes. It all popped out as naturally as possible. I suppose it would
+sound like drivel if I were to repeat it. Finally she began to laugh.
+
+“‘It is dangerous to make a woman your confidant,’ she said. ‘How do you
+know that I can keep a secret better than any other of my sex?’
+
+“‘I am not afraid on that score,’ said I. ‘This is my confessional. It
+is as sacred as any. Am I to receive absolution?’
+
+“She could not fully promise that. She read me a neat little lecture. It
+was fascinating to thus receive correction at her hands. I pledged
+myself, when it was done, to follow the course laid out for me. Then I
+made bold to exchange _rôles_. With some maidenly hesitation, which soon
+vanished, she in turn laid before me the inner history of her life. Ah,
+my boy, how little there was in it to gloss over! how much to humiliate
+the best and noblest of us men! It was a revelation that made me
+prostrate myself before her. I was not worthy to hear it.”
+
+George paused, and drummed on the table with his fingers nervously.
+
+“I may as well tell you all,” he resumed. “I had resolved to ask that
+girl to marry me when we started on our ride, but after what she said to
+me so simply and modestly, I positively could not do it. She expected me
+to speak, I know that, for she would not have told me what she did tell
+me, otherwise.”
+
+“So you didn’t speak? Oh, stupid, stupid boy!”
+
+“I know it. But my tongue was tied. Perhaps it was all cowardice; I
+can’t say. I never was afraid of any one before. I came home utterly
+shattered and down-hearted. To-day I gravitated back to her, after a
+sleepless night. She received me with the same friendly smile as usual,
+but there seemed to be a slight shadow over her spirits. That little,
+almost imperceptible change filled me with joy. I jumped to a conclusion
+that intoxicated me, and made the plunge at once.
+
+“‘It is another case of the moth and the candle,’ I said to her.
+
+“‘Thank you. So I am a candle? That is a fine figure of speech.’
+
+“‘Seriously speaking, I think we had not finished what we were talking
+of yesterday.’
+
+“‘What were we talking of yesterday?’ she had the effrontery to ask.
+‘Oh, yes, now I recollect. It was yourself. That subject, I fear, you
+will never finish talking of.’
+
+“‘Now that’s a very mean speech, all things considered,’ I whined. ‘Do
+you want to strike a man, when he’s way down?’
+
+“‘Don’t play Uriah Heep. I hate ’umble people. But if I have perchance
+pierced the thick epidermis of Parisian pride you have so long worn, I’m
+glad of it.’
+
+“She likes to abuse me, and I enjoy it quite as well as she. She
+continued to scold me and mock me for some time, to disguise her actual
+mood. I saw through it, and let her have her way for a while. The meeker
+my replies, the greater the exaggerated harshness of her criticisms. At
+last I no longer attempted to reply at all. Leaning back in a corner of
+the sofa, I watched the play of her animated features and the light of
+her dark brown eyes, and felt that she was the one woman in the
+universe that suited me, the one woman I could respect and love
+passionately at the same time.
+
+“‘You say truly I am a coward. I am aware of that. I admit that I am all
+that is detestable. If such a wretch as you describe were to love a
+woman, what unhappiness for him! There could be no hope for him. He
+would know his own irredeemable unworthiness, and so could only slink
+away in shame.’
+
+“‘You are quite right,’ she cried, laughing merrily. ‘That would be the
+only course for him to pursue.’
+
+“‘By the way,’ I said, ‘that reminds me that my train goes out in twenty
+minutes.’
+
+“I rose, and she also stood up to accompany me to the door. I held out
+my hand. It was an unusual demonstration, and perhaps she thought it
+meant good-by in earnest. At least, as she put her hand in mine, I
+detected a look I had never before seen in the depths of those fine
+eyes. With a sudden, unpremeditated, and irresistible movement, I drew
+her close to me, folded my arms about her, and kissed her passionately.
+
+“‘Clara!’ I whispered, ‘I love you! I love you! Don’t tell me to go.’
+
+“She gently drew herself out of my reluctant arms, and though her eyes
+were misty now, I saw in them that I was to stay.
+
+“That’s all the story I have to tell you, Charlie. I am too happy
+to-night to sleep, so I couldn’t let you sleep. I stayed and spent the
+evening. Mr. Desmond, bless his dear old heart! cried over Clara, and
+gave her an old-fashioned blessing. I walked home on air. Do I look very
+badly corned?”
+
+I gave him a rousing hand-shake, and wiped away a stray bit of moisture
+from my cheek.
+
+“May I tell Bessie?” were my first words when I found my tongue.
+
+“Why not? There will be no long engagement in this case. The knot shall
+be tied as soon as possible.”
+
+The announcement I made to my little wife the following morning was not
+entirely unexpected, yet it filled her with delight. Miss Van was the
+woman of all others that Bessie wished to have George marry. The
+arrangement was, therefore, completely to her satisfaction, and she
+beamed upon the happy George with true sisterly affection.
+
+What effect would the news have upon Mrs. Pinkerton? I asked myself. I
+had not long to wait for an answer, for it was at the breakfast-table
+that George fired the shot.
+
+“Mother,” said the bold youth, “I’m going to be married.”
+
+His mother abruptly stopped stirring her coffee, and her spine visibly
+stiffened, but she said nothing.
+
+“The event will occur without delay. Of course it is useless to inform
+you who is the—”
+
+“Quite useless,” Mrs. Pinkerton broke in; “my wishes in the matter are
+not of the slightest consequence to you.”
+
+“On the contrary. Now, look here; don’t be so infernally quick to
+anticipate my wilfulness. I want to conform to your wishes if I can.
+_Que faire?_”
+
+“We will talk about it after breakfast.”
+
+Accordingly, there was a serious passage-at-arms in the library after
+breakfast. George left the house a conqueror, but the conquered had no
+sort of intention of abandoning the campaign after a Bull Run defeat. In
+fact, war had only just been declared. It must not be supposed that it
+was a war the movements of which could be followed by the acutest
+military observer; the batteries were all masked, but the gunpowder was
+there. I felt confident that George would carry everything before him,
+and he did. He brought Miss Van over to spend the evening, and we had
+the pleasantest time imaginable. He would not allow his mother to say a
+word against Miss Van, and made a fair show of proving that the latter
+had, not only better blood, but also better breeding and a truer sense
+of propriety than my mother-in-law, that is, “when it came to the
+scratch,” as George said. “But who would give a snap for a young woman
+who can’t throw aside the shackles of conventionality once in a while,
+and be herself?”
+
+Miss Van was her own jolliest, sweetest self at this time. Her beauty
+had never been so noticeable: joy is an excellent cosmetic, and love
+paints far better than rouge or powder.
+
+As soon as Mrs. Pinkerton had recovered from her defeat, and when the
+engagement had become an acknowledged fact which all the world might
+know, the wedding began to loom up before us, and I could not help
+wondering if St. Thomas’s Church was to be the scene of as fashionable
+and grand a display as on the occasion when Bessie and myself were made
+one.
+
+I felt reasonably certain that Mrs. Pinkerton would make an effort to
+that end, and I was curious to see how George would look on it.
+
+Bessie, I think, would have been glad to see the marriage take place
+with as much pomp and show as possible. She was intensely interested in
+what Clara should wear, and every visit from that young woman was the
+occasion for a vast deal of confidential and no doubt highly important
+_tête-à-tête_ consultation.
+
+Mother-in-law sailed into the library one evening with unusual celerity
+of movement.
+
+“George, dear,” she said, “this cannot be true! You would not permit
+such an eccentric, uncivilized proceeding. Surely you will not offend
+our friends by—”
+
+“Avast there! Our friends be hanged!” cried George wickedly. “Yes, it’s
+true, too true. The ceremony will be private, and no cards. You can
+come, though! Next Wednesday, at two o’clock, sharp!”
+
+This was cruel. I could see his mother almost stagger under the blow.
+She attempted to remonstrate, but it was too late. George assured her
+that “it was all fixed,” and that Clara had agreed with him regarding
+the details.
+
+“Honest old John Stephens will tie the knot,” said he, “and it will be
+just as tight as if Dr. McCanon manipulated the holy bonds. I trust we
+shall have the pleasure of your company, mother. Consider yourself
+invited. A few of the choicest spirits will be on hand. Clara will wear
+the most exquisite gray travelling suit you ever laid eyes on.”
+
+The widow was flanked, outgeneralled, routed along the whole line. She
+brought forward all her reserve forces of good-breeding, and thus
+escaped a disastrous panic by retiring in good order.
+
+The ceremony occurred, as George had announced, the following
+Wednesday. The near relatives and best friends of the young couple were
+present, and it was a quiet and thoroughly enjoyable affair for all who
+participated. An hour after they had been pronounced man and wife,
+George and his bride rode away to take the train for the mountains.
+
+ “And on her lover’s arm she leant,
+ And round her waist she felt it fold,
+ And far across the hills they went
+ In that new world which is the old.”
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII.
+
+BABY TALK, OLD DIVES, AND OTHER THINGS.
+
+
+The cottage seemed dull enough after the departure of George with his
+bride. Bessie was so absorbed by the care of our little one that she had
+very little time to think of anything else, and in fact the new-comer,
+for the time being, monopolized the attention of his grandmother as well
+as of his mother. I was therefore left to my own resources.
+
+“Baby is not very well, Charlie,” Bessie informed me, one morning, with
+an anxious air. “Do you think it would do to wrap him up well and take
+him for a little ride this afternoon?”
+
+“Yes, that’s a good idea. If I can get that black horse at the livery
+stable, I’ll bring him around this afternoon. But I don’t see why you
+should wrap him up. It’s hot as blazes.”
+
+“You don’t know anything about babies, Charlie. Go along. Get a nice,
+easy carriage, and we’ll take mother with us. I long for a ride.”
+
+I departed, and secured the desired “team.”
+
+Towards two o’clock I drove up to the cottage, and the entire family
+bundled into the vehicle, and we were off. I chose a pleasant, shady
+road, and drove slowly, while Bessie and her mother filled the air with
+baby talk.
+
+As we were climbing the hill near Linwood, I saw, a short distance ahead
+of us, the form of an elderly gentleman toiling up the ascent in the
+sun. He seemed fatigued, and stopped as we drew near him, to wipe the
+beads of perspiration from his brow.
+
+“Why, it’s Mr. Desmond!” exclaimed Bessie.
+
+Sure enough! As he turned toward us I recognized the white vest, the
+expansive shirt-front, and the resplendent watch-chain that could belong
+to no other than “old Dives” himself.
+
+“How d’ye do?” I cried, halting our fiery steed.
+
+“Ah! Mr. Travers, Mrs. Pinkerton, how do you do? Delighted to meet you.
+It’s very warm.”
+
+“How came you so far out in the country afoot?” I asked.
+
+“I had some business at Melton, and lost the 2:30 train back to town,
+so I started to walk to Linwood with the purpose of taking a train on
+the other road. They told me it was only a mile and a half, but—.” And
+he sighed significantly.
+
+“How fortunate that we met you,” said Mrs. Pinkerton quickly, taking the
+words out of my mouth. “Get in and ride to Linwood with us. We have a
+vacant seat, you see.”
+
+I seconded her invitation, and without much hesitation he accepted, and
+took a seat by my side. The conversation turned naturally upon the
+“young couple” (Bessie and I were no longer referred to in that way),
+and Mr. Desmond extolled his niece unreservedly. Mother-in-law was
+evidently somewhat impressed, but I think she made some mental
+reservations.
+
+“Will you smoke, Mr. Desmond?” I asked, offering him a cigar.
+
+“No, I thank you.”
+
+“Oh, I had forgotten you did not approve of the habit. Excuse me.”
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton explained to Mr. Desmond, apologetically, that I was an
+irresponsible victim of the nicotine poison. I laughed, but Mr. Desmond
+received the explanation solemnly, and expressed his abhorrence for “the
+weed.”
+
+The old gentleman professed great admiration for baby, and said that he
+looked exactly like his mother; in fact, the resemblance was almost
+startling.
+
+By the time we had got to Linwood, our passenger had talked himself into
+a state of good-humor, and we left him at the railroad station, bowing
+and smiling with true old-school _aplomb_.
+
+Bessie thought the ride did Charlie, junior, good, and so it became a
+regular thing, on pleasant afternoons, to take him out for a little
+airing. Mrs. Pinkerton overcame her scruples, and usually accompanied
+us. A sample of the sweet converse held with my son and heir on the back
+seat will suffice:—
+
+“Sodywazzaleetlecatchykums! ‘Esoodavaboobangy! Mamma’s cunnin’
+kitten-baby!”
+
+One day, just before noon, when I had been making a mental calculation
+as to how I should be able to cover the livery-stable bill, a fine
+equipage stopped in front of the bank, and through the window I saw the
+stately driver hand a note to our errand-boy. In a moment Tommy appeared
+in the room and handed me the billet, which ran thus:—
+
+ MY DEAR MR. TRAVERS,—I trust you will not take it amiss if I
+ send my coachman out your way once in a while to exercise the
+ ponies. Since Clara’s taking-off, they have stood still too
+ much, and knowing that you go to ride occasionally with your
+ family, I take the liberty of putting them at your disposal for
+ the present, with instructions to John, who is a careful and
+ trustworthy driver, to place himself at your service whenever
+ you are so disposed. The obligation will be entirely on my part,
+ if you will kindly take a turn behind the ponies whenever you
+ choose. My regards to your wife and Mrs. Pinkerton.
+
+ Believe me yours sincerely,
+
+ T. G. DESMOND.
+
+
+I could find no objection to accepting this kindly offer, so delicately
+made, but I did not dare to do so before consulting Bessie and her
+mother, so I stepped into the carriage and had John drive me to the
+cottage. There was a consultation, and after I had overcome some feeble
+scruples on Mrs. Pinkerton’s part, which I am afraid were hypocritical,
+we decided to take advantage of Mr. Desmond’s generosity. I sent a note
+of thanks back by John, and thenceforth we took our rides behind “old
+Dives’s” black ponies. Occasionally the old gentleman himself came out
+in the carriage, and proved himself as trustworthy and careful a driver
+as John, handling the “ribbons” with the air of an accomplished whip.
+The rides were very pleasant, those beautiful summer days, and the
+change from a hired “team” to the sumptuous establishment of Mr. Desmond
+was extremely grateful.
+
+Mr. Desmond was doubtless very lonely without his niece. She had been
+the light of his home, and her absence was probably felt by the old
+gentleman with more keenness than he had anticipated at the outset. His
+large and beautifully furnished mansion needed the presence of just such
+a person of vivacious and cheery character as Clara, to prevent it from
+becoming cheerless in its grandeur. He intimated as much, and appeared
+unusually restless and low-spirited for him. He sought to make up for
+the absence of the sunshine and joyousness that “Miss Van” had taken
+away with her, by applying himself with especial diligence to business;
+but he really had not much business to engross his attention, beyond
+collecting his interest and looking out for his agents, and it failed to
+fill the void. He betook himself to his club, and killed time
+assiduously, talking with the men-about-town he found there, playing
+whist, and running through the magazines and reviews in search of wit
+and wisdom wherewith to divert himself. The dull season had set in;
+there was little doing, in affairs, commerce, politics, or literature;
+and direct efforts at killing time always result in making time go more
+heavily than ever. Mr. Desmond’s attempt was like a curious _pas seul_,
+executed by a nimble actor in a certain extravaganza, the peculiarity of
+which is that at every forward step the dancer slides farther and
+farther backward, until finally an unseen power appears to drag him back
+into the flies.
+
+It was during one of our afternoon drives, when Mr. Desmond usurped the
+office of his coachman, that he confided to us a plan which he had
+devised to cure his _ennui_.
+
+“I have made up my mind,” he said, “to go abroad for a good long tour.
+It will be the best move I could possibly make.”
+
+“I don’t doubt it,” I said. “How soon do you propose to go?” And Bessie
+sighed, “O dear, how delightful!”
+
+“My plans are not matured,” Mr. Desmond continued, “but I think I shall
+sail early next month. My favorite steamer leaves on the 6th.”
+
+“I hope you will enjoy a pleasant voyage, and a delightful trip on the
+other side,” said Mrs. Pinkerton politely.
+
+Mr. Desmond returned thanks. Nothing more was said that day concerning
+his project. When he left us at the cottage, he remarked,—
+
+“By the way, Mr. Travers, I wish you would call at my office to-morrow
+morning at or about eleven o’clock, if you can make it convenient to do
+so.”
+
+“I will do so,” I replied, wondering what he could want of me.
+
+At the appointed hour the next day I was on hand at his office. He
+motioned to me to be seated and then said,—
+
+“Yesterday morning I met John K. Blunt, of Blunt Brothers & Company, at
+my club, and he told me that their cashier had defaulted. An account of
+the affair is in this morning’s papers. They want a new cashier. I have
+mentioned your name, and if you will go around to their office with me,
+we will talk with Blunt.”
+
+“Mr. Desmond—” I began, but he stopped me.
+
+“Don’t let’s have any talk but business,” he said. “The figures will be
+satisfactory, I am confident.”
+
+Satisfactory! They were munificent! Blunt liked me, and only a few short
+and sharp sentences from such a man as Desmond finished the business. I
+saw a future of opulence before me. My head was almost turned. I tried
+to thank Mr. Desmond, but he would not listen to my earnest expressions
+of gratitude.
+
+“I have engaged passage for the 6th,” he told me when we were parting;
+“I will try to call at your cottage before I get off. I am busy settling
+up some details now. Good day.”
+
+I hastened home with my good news. Bessie’s eyes glistened when she
+heard it, and even my mother-in-law showed a faint sign of pleasure at
+my good luck.
+
+The following Saturday evening Mr. Desmond came out to see us.
+
+“Don’t consider this my farewell appearance,” he said. “I merely wished
+to tell you that my friends have inveigled me into giving an informal
+party Tuesday evening, at which I shall expect you all to appear.”
+
+He talked glibly, for him, and gave us an outline sketch of his proposed
+tour. I thought he seemed strangely restless and nervous, and I pitied
+him.
+
+His “informal party” was really a noteworthy affair, and the wealth and
+respectability of the city were well represented. Bessie could not go,
+on account of the baby, so I acted as escort to Mrs. Pinkerton, who made
+herself amazingly agreeable. There were not many young people present,
+and the affair was quiet and genteel in the extreme. Bank presidents,
+capitalists, professional men, and “solid” men, with their wives,
+attired in black silks, formed the majority of the guests. They were Mr.
+Desmond’s personal friends. My mother-in-law was in congenial company,
+and I believe she enjoyed the evening remarkably. Most of the
+conversation turned, very naturally, upon European travel. Americans who
+are possessed of wealth always have done “the grand tour,” and they
+invariably speak of “Europe” in a general way, as if it were all one
+country.
+
+“When I returned from my first tour abroad, a friend said to me that he
+‘supposed it was a fine country over there,’” said Mr. Desmond to me,
+laughing.
+
+Some one asked him where he had decided to go.
+
+“I shall land at Havre, and go straight to Paris,” he answered. “I
+flatter myself I am a good American, and as I have been comparatively
+dead since my niece left me, I am entitled to a place in that
+terrestrial paradise.”
+
+I thought I had never seen Mrs. Pinkerton appear to so good advantage as
+she did on this occasion. Her natural good manners and her intelligence
+made her attractive in such a company, and she was the centre of a
+bright group of middle-aged Brahmins throughout the entire evening. Mr.
+Desmond appeared grateful for the assistance she rendered in making his
+party pass off pleasantly, and as for me, I began to feel that I had
+never quite appreciated her best qualities. She was a woman that one
+could not wholly know in a year, perhaps not in a lifetime. “Who knows?”
+I thought; “perhaps I have wronged my mother-in-law.”
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII.
+
+A SURPRISE.
+
+
+We were feeling a little solemn at the cottage. George, with his lively
+ways, and Clara, with her sparkling vivacity, were away on their wedding
+tour, and our good friend, Mr. Desmond, to whom we had taken a great
+liking, was about to sail for an indefinite absence in foreign lands.
+Though the mother-in-law’s presence was less oppressive than formerly,
+there was now a pensiveness, an air of departed glory about it, that was
+not cheerful. There was danger of settling down to a humdrum sort of
+life, free from strife, perhaps, but at the same time devoid of that
+buoyancy which should make the home of a young couple joyous.
+
+I was a little doubtful of making a vacation in the country this summer.
+To be sure, when George went away, it was agreed that after he had gone
+the round of the White Mountains, the attractions of Canada, Niagara
+Falls, and Saratoga, he would return for a quiet stay of a few weeks, at
+the close of the season, to the little resort which we had visited a
+year ago, and there, if Bessie’s health would permit, and I could
+arrange for a sufficient absence from business, we would join them. But
+I almost dreaded taking Mrs. Pinkerton with us, and doubted whether she
+would go; at the same time, I did not like to propose leaving her behind
+to take care of the cottage. I was in perplexity, and, notwithstanding
+my splendid new prospects in business, was not feeling cheerful.
+
+Coming home from a restless round of the city on the Fourth of July,
+where I had found the great national holiday a bore, I noticed Mr.
+Desmond’s team coming up to the garden gate with a brisk turn. That fine
+old gentleman—I always feel like calling him old on account of his gray
+whiskers, though he was little more than fifty—came down the walk and
+with stately politeness assisted Bessie and the baby out of the
+carriage. I looked to see Mrs. Pinkerton follow, but she was not there,
+and clearly Mr. Desmond had not been to ride. It struck me as a little
+queer, not to say amusing, that they had been having a quiet
+_tête-à-tête_ together in the cottage while John gave Bessie and the
+baby their airing. But then, it was not so strange either, for was he
+not going to leave us in two days? It was no uncommon thing for Mrs.
+Pinkerton to stay within while Bessie was out, and he had probably
+dropped in late in the afternoon, expecting to find us all at home, as
+it was a holiday. I bade him good by in case I did not see him again, as
+he got into the carriage to ride back to the city.
+
+“Oh, I shall see you to-morrow,” he said in a brisk tone which had not
+been habitual with him of late.
+
+That evening my mother-in-law was uncommonly gracious, a little
+absent-minded, and more pleasant in spirit than I had ever known her.
+She seemed to be filled with an inward satisfaction that I could not
+make out at all. Bessie and I both remarked it, but could not surmise
+any cause for the apparent change that had come over the spirit of her
+dream.
+
+Next morning, on reaching town, I found a note asking me to step over
+to Mr. Desmond’s office when I could find time. I went at my leisure,
+wondering what was up. As I entered, he seemed remarkably cordial and
+happy.
+
+“I find that Blunt,” he said in a business-like way, “would like to have
+you take hold at once, if possible. Their affairs are in some confusion
+and need an experienced hand to straighten them out. It will be
+necessary for you to give a bond, which I have here all prepared, with
+satisfactory sureties, and you need only give us your signature, which I
+will have properly witnessed on the spot.”
+
+“Oh, is that it?” I thought. Strange I didn’t think of its having
+something to do with my new position. I knew I could get away from my
+old place at a week’s notice, as I had already made known my intention
+to leave, and there were several applicants for the position. The bond
+was executed without hesitation.
+
+“You will not lose your vacation,” Mr. Desmond said, “though your salary
+will begin at once. As soon as you can get matters in order, which may
+take a month or more, you are to be allowed a few weeks’ absence to
+recuperate and get fully prepared for your new responsibilities.”
+
+Thanking him for his kindness, I was about to go, when he said, “Sit
+down, Mr. Travers. I have something else to say to you.”
+
+“What’s coming now?” I wondered, as I took my seat again. Mr. Desmond
+seemed a little at a loss how to begin his new communication, and came
+nearer appearing embarrassed than I should have thought possible for
+him.
+
+“The fact is,” he said at last, “I have changed my mind about going
+abroad.”
+
+I have no doubt I looked very much surprised and puzzled, and smiling at
+the expression of my face, he went on,—
+
+“Your mother-in-law, Mrs. Pinkerton, is a very worthy woman; in fact, a
+remarkably worthy woman.”
+
+I couldn’t deny that; but why should he choose such a time and place to
+compliment her?
+
+“Do you know,” he added, with a still nearer approach to embarrassment
+in his manner, and something like a blush on his usually calm face, “I
+have asked her to become Mrs. Desmond.”
+
+“The devil you have!” was my thought as astonishment fairly overcame
+me. I didn’t say it, though, but it was my turn to be embarrassed, and I
+hardly knew what to say.
+
+Having got it out, Mr. Desmond fairly recovered his equanimity. “Yes,”
+he said, “I put the idea away from me for a long time, but it would
+persist in growing upon me, and I finally concluded that perhaps it
+might contribute to the happiness of _all_ parties, so I have taken the
+plunge. I hope you approve of it,” he added, with a queer twinkle in his
+eye.
+
+“With all my heart, sir,” I said earnestly; “and I am sure it will be as
+pleasing as it is surprising to us all.”
+
+Throughout that afternoon I was restless, and eager to get home to tell
+Bessie the wonderful news. It was the longest afternoon I ever saw, but
+at length it passed and I hurried home. As Bessie met me at the door I
+said eagerly, “I’ve got a surprise for you, deary.”
+
+Now I noticed for the first time that she was all smiles and full of
+something that she was eager to surprise me with. Simultaneously each
+recognized that the other had the secret already. Of course; what a
+fool I was! Her mother naturally enough would tell her while Mr. Desmond
+broke the matter to me.
+
+“Isn’t it jolly?” I said.
+
+“Why, Charlie, are you then so anxious to get rid of poor, dear mamma?”
+she said, half reproachfully and half teasingly.
+
+“Oh, no, of course not, but it is really nice for all of us, isn’t it
+now? She won’t be far off, you know; we shall have our little home all
+to ourselves, and Mr. Desmond will be a sort of guardian for us. And as
+I said before, I think it is jolly.”
+
+“Well, I must confess I do not altogether like the idea of mamma
+marrying again, and I shall miss her very much, after all.”
+
+I couldn’t help laughing at the little woman’s demure countenance, as
+she said this. There was a little trace of jealousy in her gentle
+heart—jealousy so natural to women—at the idea of another’s taking her
+mother off, just as that good woman had been jealous at her taking off.
+I accused her of it, and she repudiated the idea.
+
+But everybody must admit that things had fallen out just right for all
+parties, and the shadow was to be taken from our household by a new
+burst of sunlight, without any heart-burning for anybody, and with
+nothing but satisfaction for all. It was arranged that the new marriage
+should presently occur, and the mature couple take a little trip, and
+surprise George and Clara by being at the Fairview Hotel before them.
+Their first knowledge of the turn of affairs was to come when they
+arrived there late in August, and found their new relations in
+possession. Bessie and I were to join the party for a brief stay, and so
+my perplexity was happily ended.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV.
+
+A HAPPY PROSPECT.
+
+
+The landscape is lovely in these latter days of August. The mountains
+are grand and solemn in their everlasting silence. We are together at
+the Fairview, and everybody feels free and happy. There is no restraint,
+and our future prospects are delightful. Before George left home in June
+he had made application for a vacant chair in the Medical College and
+presented his credentials and testimonials. He expected nothing from it,
+he said, but would leave me to look out and see what decision was made.
+I had brought with me the news of his appointment. I had also secured
+for him the refusal of an elegant house which had been suddenly vacated
+and offered for sale on account of the failure in business of its owner.
+It was very near our cottage, had lovely surroundings, was beautifully
+furnished, and was to be sold with all its contents. It has now been
+decided between George and Mr. Desmond that it shall be purchased at
+once, and shall become the legal possession of Clara, being paid for out
+of her ample fortune, now under her own control, but not yet taken from
+her uncle’s keeping.
+
+Mr. and Mrs. Desmond will take possession of the city mansion, and I
+have no doubt that its state and elegance will be fully kept up. I see
+before me happy times for us all, and at last I think we understand and
+appreciate each other. Our relations being properly and happily
+adjusted, there will be no more “unpleasantness.” And I must acknowledge
+that, in spite of past feelings and the little clouds that have flecked
+our sky, sometimes appearing dark and portentous, these happy results
+are due in no small measure to MY MOTHER-IN-LAW.
+
+
+THE END.
+
+
+
+
+Transcriber’s Note: The table below lists all corrections applied to
+the original text.
+
+p. 039: a hand encased in a mit -> mitt
+p. 128: [added quotes] better than any other of my sex?’
+p. 131: [added quotes] slink away in shame.’
+p. 133: [added quotes] _Que faire?_”
+p. 145: And Besssie sighed -> Bessie
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of That Mother-in-Law of Mine, by Anonymous
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of That Mother-in-Law of Mine, by Anonymous
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: That Mother-in-Law of Mine
+
+Author: Anonymous
+
+Release Date: October 16, 2009 [EBook #30270]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THAT MOTHER-IN-LAW OF MINE ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Irma Spehar, Markus Brenner and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+ THAT MOTHER-IN-LAW
+ OF
+ MINE.
+
+
+ "BE TO HER VIRTUES VERY KIND,
+ BE TO HER FAULTS A LITTLE BLIND."
+
+
+ PHILADELPHIA:
+ THE KEYSTONE PUBLISHING CO.
+ 1889.
+
+
+
+ COPYRIGHT
+ BY JOHN E. POTTER AND COMPANY,
+ 1879
+
+
+
+ Dedicated
+ TO ALL THOSE HAVING
+ MOTHERS-IN-LAW
+ OR EXPECTING TO HAVE.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+
+CHAPTER Page
+
+ I. BESSIE AND I AND BESSIE'S MOTHER 7
+
+ II. COURTING THE MOTHER 15
+
+ III. OUR MARRIAGE 28
+
+ IV. MOUNTAINS AND MORE MOTHER-IN-LAW 37
+
+ V. THE RISE AND FALL 50
+
+ VI. WHAT IS HOME WITHOUT A MOTHER-IN-LAW? 71
+
+ VII. MISS VAN'S PARTY AND ANOTHER UNPLEASANTNESS 84
+
+VIII. ANOTHER CHARLIE IN THE FIELD 98
+
+ IX. THE SHADOW ON OUR LIFE 108
+
+ X. MY MOTHER-IN-LAW SUBDUED 115
+
+ XI. GEORGE'S NEW DEPARTURE 123
+
+ XII. BABY TALK, OLD DIVES, AND OTHER THINGS 138
+
+XIII. A SURPRISE 150
+
+ XIV. A HAPPY PROSPECT 158
+
+
+
+
+MY MOTHER-IN-LAW.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+BESSIE AND I AND BESSIE'S MOTHER.
+
+
+"Why, Charlie, you sha'n't talk so about my mother! I won't allow it."
+
+"It does sound a little rough, my dear; but I can't help it. She does
+exasperate me so. She doesn't show a proper deference for your husband,
+my dear. We are married now, and she ought to give up her objections to
+me. I can't be expected to place myself in her leading strings."
+
+"But you mustn't demand too much at once, and should try to conciliate
+her. Now do, for my sake; won't you, dear?"
+
+Here we were, only a month married, and spending our honeymoon at a most
+charming summer resort, where there was no excuse for getting out of
+patience. Everything was beautiful and attractive: Little hotel,
+strange to say, quite delightful; no fault to find with surroundings and
+accommodations; my darling Bessie, as sweet as an angel and determined
+to be happy and to make me happy; everything, in short, calculated to
+give us a long summer of delight.
+
+That is, if Bessie had only been an orphan. But there was her mother,
+who had joined us on our summer trip, after the first two weeks of
+unalloyed happiness, and threatened to accompany us through life.
+Already it almost made the prospect dismal. The idea that Bessie and I
+would ever quarrel, or even have any impatient words together, had
+seemed to me to be simply ridiculous. I had seen what I had seen. My
+dashing friend, Fred, and his stylish wife,--they had been married two
+years, and a visible coldness had come upon them. I knew, by an
+occasional angry whisper and knitting of the brow before people, that he
+must sometimes swear and rave in the privacy of their own rooms, and her
+cutting replies or haughty indifference showed that there had been a
+deal of love lost between them in those two years.
+
+Other people, too, got indifferent or downright hostile in their
+marital relations. But then, I was not a dashing fellow and Bessie was
+not stylish, and in other ways we were quite different from most people.
+Ours had been a real love-match from the first. Bessie was simple and
+unaffected, honest and pure in every thought, and determined to make me
+a faithful and loving wife till death did us part. As for me, why, of
+course I was generous and affectionate, ready to make any sacrifice and
+bear any burden for the trusting creature who had so freely given
+herself into my keeping. There should be no clouds to darken her life. I
+would never be selfish or impatient, or for one moment hurt her gentle
+heart by heedless act or careless word.
+
+But plague upon it! I could not get on with her mother; and here I was,
+before our summer holiday was over, and before we had settled down to
+that home life in which trouble and annoyance must needs come, getting
+out of patience and saying cruel things; and there was Bessie, sitting
+in the summer twilight with a light shawl drawn over her shoulders,
+pouting her pretty lips with vexation, and digging the toes of her
+little boots into the balustrade in front of us, because I had expressed
+a pious wish that her mother was in Jericho. I declare, if there weren't
+tears gathering in her gentle blue eyes!
+
+I was angry with myself, and, putting my arm around her slender waist, I
+laid my cheek against hers and said soothingly, "Never mind, darling! I
+didn't mean it. Don't think any more about it."
+
+But as we sat for the next five minutes without saying a word, I
+couldn't help pondering on the possibilities of the future, for Mrs.
+Pinkerton was to live with us. That was one of the understood conditions
+of our bargain, and it was evident that she was to furnish the test of
+all my good resolutions.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton had been left a widow when Bessie was twelve years old,
+with a neat little cottage in the suburbs of the city and a snug
+competence in a secure investment. I was fairly settled in business,
+with an income that would enable us to live in modest comfort, and was
+determined not to disturb the investment or have it drawn upon in any
+way for household expenses. But the old lady--I already began to speak
+of her by that disrespectful epithet, although she was still under
+fifty--was to live with us. I had readily acquiesced in that
+arrangement, for was it not my darling's wish? And I could not decently
+make any objection, for it was mighty convenient to have a pretty
+cottage, ready furnished, in one of the finest suburbs of the city in
+which I was employed.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton was a good woman in her way: how could she be anything
+else and the mother of such an angel as I had secured for my wife? She
+meant well, of course; I admitted that, and I ought to be on the
+pleasantest terms with her, and determined from the first that I would
+be. But somehow we were not congenial, and when that is the case the
+best people in the world find it hard to get along agreeably together.
+
+The course of true love between Bessie and me had run very smooth. From
+the moment my old school-fellow, her brother George, now in Paris
+studying medicine, had introduced me to her, I had been completely won
+by her sweet disposition and charming ways, and she in turn was
+captivated by my manly independence, strong good sense, and generous
+impulses. I am not vain, but the truth is the truth; and, as I am
+telling this story myself, I must set down the facts. We fell in love
+right away, and it was not long before we were mutually convinced that
+we were made expressly for each other and could never be happy apart.
+
+So it happened that I had to do the courting with the mother. She was
+the one to be won over, and it was not likely to be an easy task, for I
+plainly saw that she did not quite approve of me. When I was first
+introduced to her, she looked at me with her great, steady blue eyes, as
+if analyzing me to the very boots, and evidently set me down as a
+somewhat arrogant and self-sufficient young fellow who needed a
+judicious course of discipline to teach him humility. I was generally
+self-possessed and had no little confidence in myself, but I confess
+that I was embarrassed in her presence. She was not at all like Bessie,
+I thought. She had taught school in her youth, and had learned to
+command and be obeyed. The late Mr. Pinkerton, I fancied, had found it
+useless to contend against her authority, and this had increased her
+disposition to carry things her own way; and her seven years' widowhood,
+with its independence and self-reliance, had not prepared her to be
+submissive to the wishes of others.
+
+Still, she loved her daughter with tender devotion, and her chief
+anxiety was to have her every wish gratified. Therein was my advantage,
+for I knew that Bessie, gentle and trusting as she was, would never give
+me up or allow her life to be happy without the gratification of her
+first love. So I set to work confidently to make myself agreeable to the
+widow and win her consent to our marriage.
+
+"You must bring mamma around to approve of it," Bessie had said, on that
+ever-to-be-remembered evening, when we were returning from a long drive,
+and after an hour of sweet confidences she had surrendered herself
+without reserve to my future keeping. "She is the best mother in the
+world, and loves me very much, but she is peculiar in some ways, and I
+am afraid she doesn't altogether like you. I would not for the world
+displease her, that is, if I could help it," she added, glancing up, as
+much as to say, "It is all settled now forever and forevermore, whatever
+may befall, but do get my mother to consent to it with a good grace."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+COURTING THE MOTHER.
+
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton sat in an easy-chair near the window, doing nothing, when
+I marched in to begin the siege. I felt diffident and uneasy, although I
+am not usually troubled that way. But if I should live to the advanced
+age of Methusaleh, I could never forget Mrs. Pinkerton's appearance on
+that memorable occasion. Before I had spoken a word I saw that she knew
+what was coming, and had hardened her heart against me. She had
+anticipated all that I would say, had discounted my plea, as it were,
+and prejudged the whole case. Her look plainly said: "Young man, I know
+your pitiful story. You needn't tell me. You may be very well as young
+men go, you fancy you can more than fill a mother's place in Bessie's
+inexperienced heart, but you can't get me out. I am Adamant. Your
+intentions are all very honorable, but you are a graceless intruder.
+Your credentials are rejected on sight." I saw the difficult task I had
+undertaken. "Mrs. Pinkerton," I said, mustering all my forces, "it is no
+use mincing the matter, or beating about the shrubbery. I am in love
+with your daughter, and Bessie is in love with me. I believe I can make
+Bessie happy, and am sure nothing but Bessie can make me happy. I have
+come to ask your consent to our marriage." Then I hung my head like a
+whipped school-boy.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton took off her eye-glasses, and then put them on again with
+considerable care; after which she leveled a look at me and through me
+that made me feel like calling out "Murder!" or making for the door. But
+I stood my ground, and heard her say quietly,--
+
+"So you are engaged to my daughter?"
+
+A simple remark, but the tone meant "You are a puppy." I had to muster
+all my resolution to reply politely and coolly that, with her gracious
+consent, such was the fact.
+
+"Are you aware that it is customary to obtain parental consent before
+proceeding to such lengths?"
+
+"Mrs. Pinkerton, excuse me. I thought in my ignorance that it would be
+just as well to do that afterwards; or rather, I didn't think anything
+about it. I was so much in love with Bessie that it was all out before I
+knew it. If I had thought, of course I would have--"
+
+"Yes, yes," said Mrs. Pinkerton, "if your kind of people ever thought,
+they would undoubtedly do differently. Bessie certainly ought to know
+better. Girls rush into matrimony now-a-days with as much carelessness
+as they would choose partners at a game of croquet. I should have been
+consulted in this. It is all wrong to allow young people to have such
+entire freedom in affairs of this kind as they are allowed in these
+days."
+
+"But certainly, my dear Mrs. Pinkerton," I said, becoming somewhat
+impatient, "you will not refuse your consent in this case? Bessie's
+happiness--that is, the happiness of all of us, or--our
+happiness--Bessie's and mine, I would say--"
+
+"No doubt your happiness is very important to yourself, Mr. Travers,
+and as to my daughter's well-being, I have looked to that for quite a
+number of years past, and I flatter myself I shall be able to look out
+for it in the future."
+
+"Not if you insist on parting us!" I cried, getting out of patience and
+letting all my carefully prepared plans of assault go by the board. "You
+may withhold your consent, but that cannot prevent our loving each
+other!"
+
+"Of course not. Nothing on earth can prevent young people who are in
+love from making themselves ridiculous. But getting married and living
+together soon cures them of sentimentalism."
+
+"Won't you give us that chance to be cured then, my dear Mrs.
+Pinkerton?" I exclaimed, regaining a little tact.
+
+She seemed to be taking it under advisement, and my courage came up a
+little. Then, looking at me with her peculiarly searching gaze, she
+said, "It isn't necessary to argue the case; I know all you would say.
+You love Bessie to distraction; you could not live without her; your
+heart would be hopelessly broken if you had to give her up; you will be
+true to her forever and a day; you offer her all of the good things of
+this world that any sane woman could desire, besides which you throw in
+an eternal, undying devotion; and so on, to the end of the chapter. We
+will consider that all said, and so save time and trouble. You think
+that ought to end the matter and bring me to your way of thinking. I
+wonder at the effrontery of young men, who walk into our households and
+carelessly tell us mothers what is best for our children, and assure us,
+between their puffs of tobacco smoke, that a case of three weeks'
+moonshining outweighs the devotion of a lifetime."
+
+I began to see what course was open for me. The old lady was jealous,
+and I could not blame her. Her objections were general, not specific.
+Strategy must take the place of a direct assault. There flashed through
+my mind the ridiculous old nonsense rhyme quotation,--
+
+ "I must soften the heart of this terrible cow."
+
+I said gently, "I can readily see how a mother must regard the claims of
+the man who comes to her demanding her most precious treasure; and what
+you say makes me feel how presumptuous my demand must seem. I love your
+daughter--that must be my only excuse. And after all, what has happened
+was only what a mother must expect. Your daughter's love will not be the
+less yours because she also loves the man of her choice. That she should
+love and be loved was inevitable."
+
+"We will not go into the discussion any further," she interrupted. "I
+don't wish to say anything uncomplimentary of you personally, but I
+simply am not prepared to give my daughter up at present. My opinion of
+men in general is good, so long as they do not interfere with me or
+mine."
+
+(Mental note: "May there be precious little interference between us!")
+
+"Your judgment is doubtless good," I said, smiling; "but there are
+exceptions which prove the rule, and I hope you will find that even I
+will improve upon acquaintance."
+
+"Your conceit is abominable, young man."
+
+"Thank you. I have found no one who could flatter me except myself, so I
+lose no opportunity to give myself a good character."
+
+"Especially in addressing the mother of the woman you wish to marry,
+eh?"
+
+"Precisely, as she is naturally prejudiced against me. My dear Mrs.
+Pinkerton, what must I do to please you?"
+
+"Hold your tongue!"
+
+"Anything but that. You admit that I am a good fellow enough, and that
+Bessie would probably marry some one in course of time. Now, I don't see
+why you cannot make us both happy by giving your consent. It costs you a
+pang to do it. I honor you for that. Give me the right to console you."
+
+"By making myself an object of pity? No, not yet, not yet. I must, at
+least, have time to think."
+
+I inwardly cursed my luck. How long was this sort of thing going to
+last? I was about to rise and take my leave, when an inspiration struck
+me.
+
+"Mrs. Pinkerton," I said gravely, "what you have said of the ties that
+exist between you and your daughter has touched me deeply. I believe we
+young people do not half appreciate a mother's unchanging love. It lies
+so far beneath the surface that we are too apt to forget its constant
+blessing. My mother died when I was very young. Ah, if she were only
+here now, to plead my cause for me!"
+
+With these words, I turned on my heel and hastily got out of the room. I
+went into the garden and lighted a cigar, the better to think over the
+situation. I could not determine what progress, if any, I had made in
+the good graces of Mrs. Pinkerton. While I was cogitating, Bessie came
+out and approached me with an inquiring look. I am afraid my returning
+glance did not greatly reassure her. As she came up and took my arm, she
+said,--
+
+"Well?"
+
+"Well! No, it's not very well. I am beaten, my dear. Your mother is
+simply a stony-hearted parent!"
+
+"What did she say?"
+
+"Oh, she wants you to grow up an old maid--as if such a thing were
+possible!--and says that lovers have no idea of what a mean, cruel thing
+it is to rob people of only daughters; and that she shall require time
+to think of it. What do you think of that?"
+
+Bessie knitted her pretty brows, and dug her toes into the walk.
+
+"Perhaps I had better go to her?" she said.
+
+"Of course you must. But I know it won't be of any use just yet. We
+must, as she says, give her time. She will come around all right at the
+end of nine or ten years. The fact is, Bessie, she's a little bit
+jealous of me and regards me as an intruder."
+
+"Poor, dear mamma!" said Bessie, her eyes becoming moist.
+
+"Poor, dear pussy-cat! You should have seen her shoot me with her eyes
+and ridicule my honest sentiment. She used me roughly, my dear, and I
+can't help wondering at my amazing politeness to her."
+
+Bessie was not discouraged. She had several interviews with her mother,
+in which protestations, tears, smiles, and coaxings played a part, but
+there was no apparent change of heart on the part of the old lady, after
+all. I don't know how long this disagreeable state of affairs would have
+continued under ordinary circumstances, had not an unexpected,
+thrilling, and, as it happened, fortunate occurrence hastened a crisis
+and brought an end to the siege. It was a very singular thing, and it
+seemed to have been pre-arranged to bring me glory, and, what was
+better, the desired goodwill of the "stony-hearted parent."
+
+If there was any one thing that the worthy Mrs. Pinkerton detested more
+than men and tobacco, that thing was a burglar. Add fear to detestation,
+and you will see that when I defended the old lady from the attentions
+of a burglar, I had taken a long step into her good graces.
+
+It was a week after the interview narrated above, and in the early
+summer, Mrs. Pinkerton had gone down to a quiet sea-side resort for a
+short stay, thinking to get away from me; but I was not to be put off
+so. I followed her, taking a room at the same hotel.
+
+About one o'clock at night, the particular burglar to whom I owe so
+much, effected an entrance into the hotel through a basement window, and
+quietly made his way up stairs. Every one was asleep except myself, and
+I was planning all sorts of expedients to conquer the prejudices of my
+mother-in-law that was to be. Mrs. Pinkerton's room opened on a long
+corridor, near the end of which my modest seven-by-nine snuggery was
+situated. It was a warm night, and the transoms over the doors of almost
+all the bed-chambers had been left open to admit the air. A gleam of
+light from a dark-lantern, coming through my transom, was what led me to
+hastily don a pair of trousers and take my revolver from my valise. Then
+I opened my door very cautiously, without having struck a light, and
+could see--nothing! I waited a few moments, almost holding my breath. At
+the end of those few moments I could make out the form of a man swarming
+over the top of the door of Mrs. Pinkerton's room. His head and
+shoulders were already inside the room, and I could see his legs wriggle
+about as he noiselessly wormed his way through the narrow transom. It
+took me but a brief second of time to glide forward on tiptoe and mount
+the same chair which had been used by the intruder in climbing to the
+transom. This done, I seized both the wriggling legs simultaneously, and
+gave a tremendous pull.
+
+My excitement must have imbued me with double my natural strength, and
+the result of that pull was simply indescribable. Burglar,
+transom-glass, chair and all, went in a heap on the floor of the
+corridor, producing the most appalling and unearthly racket conceivable.
+The whole house was in an uproar in a moment. People seemed to spring up
+from every square foot of floor in the corridor as if by magic. Cries of
+"Fire!" "Murder!" "Help!" and screams of frightened women, rose on every
+hand. The costumes which I beheld on that momentous occasion were not
+only varied but exceedingly amusing and picturesque as well. The
+assembled multitude found nothing to interest them, however. I alone was
+to be seen, seated on a broken chair, with a rapidly swelling black eye,
+while broken glass and an extinguished lantern lay on the floor. I told
+the male guests what had happened. The burglar had not waited to ask for
+my card, but had contented himself with planting one blow from the
+shoulder on my left eye, before I could get upon my legs. And my
+revolver. Well, I had not had the ghost of a chance to use it. It was in
+my pocket. Fifteen minutes after the fracas, Mrs. Pinkerton came to my
+room, completely dressed, and insisted upon coming in to hear all about
+it and to overwhelm me with thanks and admiration. I was as modest as
+heroes proverbially are, and then and there told her never to refer to
+the subject again unless she addressed me as Bessie's betrothed.
+
+We went riding together, Bessie, Mrs. Pinkerton, and I, the day after
+this episode; and without any previous indication of an approaching
+thaw, that singular old lady began to talk freely about what should be
+worn at "the wedding," referring to it as though she had been the
+principal agent in bringing it about.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+OUR MARRIAGE.
+
+
+So it was that I brought my darling's mother around to consent, if not
+with a very good grace, still with apparent cheerfulness, and she at
+once took the direction of the nuptial preparations. I made a show of
+consulting her about many things, but she invariably gave me to
+understand that her experience and superior knowledge in such matters
+were not to be gainsaid. I was willing to leave to her all the fuss and
+frippery of preparing clothes for her daughter. It always seemed to me
+that she had clothes enough, and clothes that were good enough for
+married life. I couldn't understand why a young woman, on becoming a
+wife, should need a lot of new and elaborate dresses, such as she had
+never worn and never cared to wear, and an endless variety of
+under-garments of mysterious and incomprehensible make, with frills and
+fringes and laces and edgings, as if, up to that time, she had never had
+anything next to her precious person, except what was visible to the
+exterior world. And even assuming that she donned these things for the
+first time as parts of a manifold and complicated wedding garment, why
+should so much fine needle-work and delicate trimming be prepared to be
+stowed away out of sight of prying mortals, for whose vision women are
+presumed to dress themselves? Are they got up to show to friends and
+excite envy, and to fill the minds of other young people with a sense of
+the difficulties of getting married?
+
+One day, when I happened in,--by accident, of course,--and the mother
+happened to be out on one of her many pilgrimages to town, Bessie took
+me up to her room in a half-frightened way, as if doing something that
+she was afraid was terribly improper, and showed me a bewildering
+profusion of these things, neatly tucked away in bureau drawers. I
+laughed outright, and asked her who was to see all that finery. She was
+vexed and bit her lip, and I was sorry and voted myself a brute. From
+that moment, I determined not to say a word about the clothes, except to
+express unstinted admiration.
+
+There was not only clothing, but blankets and quilts and bed linen,
+though we were to live in her old home, which was already well supplied.
+One would suppose that a large and sudden increase of family was
+expected at once. These things annoyed me as senseless, and as absorbing
+so much of my Bessie's attention that we didn't have half the blissful
+times together that we had before our engagement was an acknowledged
+thing. But I knew that it was the mother's doings. Bessie did not really
+have any foolish care for dress, though always beautifully arrayed
+without any apparent effort; but she supposed it was the proper thing,
+and submitted to her mother.
+
+But there was one thing I set my heart on. I wanted a quiet wedding,
+without display or pretence. It did seem to me that this was a private
+occasion in which the wishes of the persons chiefly concerned should be
+consulted. It was their business and should be conducted in their own
+way. Bessie sympathized with me, and wanted of all things to go to
+church quietly and privately, and then, after a leave-taking with a few
+intimate friends at home, start right off on our proposed trip to the
+White Mountains. But no; we were inexperienced, and the widow knew what
+the occasion demanded much better than we did. She was a little grand in
+her ideas, and felt the importance of keeping on good terms with
+society. I was disposed to apply profane epithets to society, and to
+insist that this marriage was mine and Bessie's, and nobody's else. But
+what was the use? There would be unpleasant feelings, and the mamma must
+be conciliated, and so I yielded after a warm but altogether
+affectionate little controversy with Bessie.
+
+Every time I came to the house now, I was informed of some new feature
+which Mrs. P. had decided upon as indispensable to the gorgeousness of
+the occasion.
+
+"Have you ordered your dress suit yet?" she asked one evening.
+
+"Dress suit? Oh yes. I had almost forgotten that."
+
+"And, by the way, those cards? I think you had better send them out:
+you write such a good, legible hand."
+
+"Y-e-s, oh yes. With pleasure."
+
+"When you go to the city to-morrow, I wish you would drop in at Draper's
+and get me a few little things. I have made out a list, so it won't be
+any trouble to you."
+
+"No trouble at all. Glad to do it."
+
+"That white ribbon should be medium width. And before I forget it, have
+you written yet to your friend De Forest about his standing up?"
+
+"No, I forgot it. I'll drop him a line to-morrow. But what do you want
+that ribbon to be so long for?"
+
+"That is to be held across the aisle by the ushers, you know, to keep
+off the _ignobile vulgus_. You and Bessie will march up _here_, you see,
+preceded by the four ushers and the bridesmaids and groomsmen, who will
+then range themselves off this way. The members of the families and the
+friends will be separated from the other people _thus_. It's very
+pretty. Belle Graham was married that way at St. Thomas's, and everybody
+said it was splendid."
+
+This is the kind of talk I had to listen to for weeks, and is it any
+wonder that I grew thin and had sleepless nights?
+
+I was now a mere puppet in the hands of Mrs. Pinkerton, and came and
+went as she pulled the wires. She had arranged that the affair was to
+take place in "her church"--and a very fashionable temple of worship it
+was. Her rector was to officiate, assisted by the vealy young man who
+had just graduated from the theological seminary. There were to be four
+bridesmaids and an equal number of groomsmen and of ushers. I should
+have liked to have something to say about who should "stand up" with us,
+as Mrs. Pinkerton expressed it; but when I timidly suggested that some
+of my friends would be available for the purpose, I was taken aback to
+learn that the entire list had been made up and decided upon without my
+knowledge, and that only one of the groomsmen chosen was a friend of
+mine,--De Forest,--the others being young men whom the worthy Mrs.
+Pinkerton had selected from her list of society people. One of the young
+men was a downright fool, if I must call things by their right names,
+but he dressed to perfection; the remaining two I scarcely knew by
+sight, but I did know that one of them had seen the time when he aspired
+to occupy the place I was now filling in respect to the Pinkerton
+household: need I say more concerning my sentiments regarding him?
+
+The ushers,--well, of course, they were the four young gentlemen who
+knew everybody who was anybody, and I could not object to them,
+considering that they charged nothing for their onerous services.
+
+The bridesmaids were all old school friends of Bessie's, and two of them
+were considered pretty, and the other two were stylish.
+
+One of my keenest regrets was that Bessie's brother George was away off
+in Paris, and could not grace the occasion with his superb presence; for
+he was a superb fellow in all respects, and I felt a true brotherly
+affection for him. Had he not introduced me to Bessie? Had he not always
+wanted me to become his brother-in-law?
+
+The great day came at last. The town was full of the invited people, and
+the weather, so anxiously looked to on such occasions, was all that
+could be desired. My remembrance of the solemn events of that day is
+now rather misty. I remember the tussle De Forest and I had with my
+collar and cravat in the morning, and how he stuck pins into my neck,
+and wrestled mightily with his own elaborate toilet. I remember, and
+this very distinctly, how awfully tight were my new patent-leather
+boots, which caused me for the time being the most excruciating anguish.
+Beyond these, and similar minor things which have a way of sticking in
+the memory, all the rest is very much like a vivid dream. The close
+carriage whirling through the streets; a great crush of people, with
+here and there a familiar, smiling face; Bessie in her wedding-dress of
+white silk, with her long veil and twining garlands of orange blossoms;
+the bridesmaids, radiant in tarletan, with pretty blue bows and sashes;
+the long aisle, up which we marched with slow and reverent tread; the
+pealing measures of the Wedding Chorus; the dignified and fatherly
+clergyman; the vealy young assistant; the unction of the slowly intoned
+words of the marriage-service; the fumbling for the ring,--and through
+it all there rises, as out of a mist, the face of my mother-in-law, the
+presiding genius of it all, the unknown quantity in the equation of my
+married life, now begun amid the felicitations, more or less sincere, of
+a host of kissing, hand-shaking, smiling, chattering, good-natured
+aunts, uncles, cousins, and relatives of all degrees.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+MOUNTAINS AND MORE MOTHER-IN-LAW.
+
+
+So the bells were rung, metaphorically speaking, and we were wed. I had
+a long leave of absence from the banking-house in which I held a
+responsible and confidential position, and we started for the mountains,
+leaving mamma Pinkerton to put things to rights and follow us in a
+fortnight, when we had decided to settle down for a month's quiet stay
+in a picturesque town of the mountain region. Oh, the unrestrained joy
+of that fortnight! Everybody at the hotels seemed to know by instinct
+that we were a newly-married pair, and knowing glances passed between
+them. But what did we care? With pride and a conscious embarrassment
+that made my hand tremble, I wrote on the registers in a bold hand
+"Charles Travers and wife." I asked for the best room with a pleasant
+out-look. The smiling clerk, trained to dissimulation, would appear as
+unconscious as the blank safe behind him, but he knew all the while, the
+sly rascal, that we were on a wedding trip, and he paid special
+attention to our comfort. We saw the glories and wonders of the
+mountains, and shared their inspiration as with a single heart. We rose
+early to drink the clear air and greet the rising sun together. We
+strolled out in the evening to romantic spots, and there, with arms
+around each other, as we walked or stood gazing on the scene and
+listening to the rustling breeze, we were happy. For two weeks our lives
+blended with each other and with nature, and it was with a sigh that we
+mounted the lumbering stage to take up our sojourn in the retired town
+on the hills. We came to the little hotel just at night, and were stared
+at and commented upon by those who had been there three days and assumed
+the air of having had possession for years. We were tired, and kept
+aloof that evening, and the next day mother-in-law arrived.
+
+As she dismounted from the coach, she gave the driver a severe warning
+to be careful of her trunk, an iron-bound treasure that would have
+defied the efforts of the most determined baggage-smasher. Bessie had
+flown to meet her, and their greeting was affectionate; but to me the
+old lady presented a hand encased in a mitt, or sort of glove with
+amputated fingers, and gave me a stately, "I hope you are well, sir,"
+that rather made me feel sick. She looked full at me in her steady and
+commanding way, as much as to say, "Well, you have committed no
+atrocious crime yet, I suppose; but I am rather surprised at it."
+
+If there is anything I pride myself on, it is self-possession and a
+willingness to face anybody and give as good as I get, but that
+magnificently imperious way of looking with those large eyes always
+disconcerted me. I could not brace myself enough to meet them with any
+show of impudence, though the old lady had not ceased to regard that as
+the chief trait of my character. As Mrs. Pinkerton trod with stately
+step the rude piazza of that summer hotel, she put her eye-glasses on
+and surveyed its occupants with a look that made them shrink into
+themselves and feel ashamed to be sitting about in that idle way. I
+believe the old lady's eyesight was good enough, and that she used her
+glasses, with their gold bows and the slender chain with which they were
+suspended about her neck, for effect. I noticed that if they were not on
+she always put them on to look at anything, and if they happened to be
+on she took them off for the same purpose.
+
+"Well," she said, going into the little parlor, and looking from the
+windows, "this really seems to be a fine situation. The view of the
+mountains is quite grand."
+
+"Very kind of you to approve of the mountains, but you could give them
+points on grandeur," I thought; but I merely remarked, "We find it quite
+pleasant here."
+
+She turned and glanced at me without reply, as much as to say, "Who
+addressed you, sir? You would do well to speak when you are spoken to."
+I was abashed, but was determined to do the agreeable so far as I could,
+in spite of the rebuke of those eyes.
+
+"The house doesn't seem to me to be very attractive," she continued,
+glancing around with a gaze that took in everything through all the
+partition walls, and assuming a tone that meant, "I am speaking to you,
+Bessie, and no one else." "What sort of people are there here?"
+
+"Oh, some very pleasant people, I should judge," said Bessie, "but we
+have been here only one day, you know, and have made no acquaintances to
+speak of. Charlie's friend, Fred Marston, from the city, is here with
+his wife; and I met a young lady to whom I took quite a fancy this
+morning, a Miss Van Duzen. She is quite wealthy, and an orphan, and is
+here with her uncle, a fine-looking gentleman, who is president of a
+bank, or an insurance company, or some thing of the sort. You saw him, I
+think, on the piazza,--the large man, with gray side-whiskers, white
+vest, and heavy gold chain."
+
+"Yes, I noticed him. A pompous-looking old gentleman, isn't he?"
+
+"Oh, he is dignified in his manner, but not at all pompous," was the
+reply.
+
+"Well, I call him pompous, if looks mean anything," said the mother,
+with the air of one to whom looks were quite sufficient. "I think I will
+go to my room," she added, and turned a glance on me, as much as to say,
+"You needn't come, sir." I had no intention of going, and wandered out
+on the piazza, feeling as though Bessie had almost been taken away from
+me again.
+
+When she rejoined me, leaving her mother above stairs, I asked, "What
+does she think of her room?"
+
+"Well, it doesn't quite suit her. She thinks the furniture scanty and
+shabby, water scarce, towels rather coarse, and she can't endure the
+sight of a kerosene lamp; but she will make herself quite comfortable, I
+dare say."
+
+"And everybody else uncomfortable," I felt like adding, but restrained
+myself.
+
+She came down to tea, and being offered a seat on the other side of me
+from Bessie, firmly declined it, and took the one on the other side of
+her daughter from me. As she unfolded her napkin she took in the whole
+table with a searching glance, and had formed a quick estimate of
+everybody sitting around it. Miss Clara Van Duzen and Mr. Desmond, her
+uncle, sat opposite, and an introduction across the table took place.
+The young lady was vivacious and talkative, and tried to make herself
+agreeable, but my mother-in-law did not like what she afterwards called
+her "chatter," and set her down as a frivolous young person. "Miss Van,"
+as everybody called her, with her own approval,--for, as she said, she
+detested the Duzen which her Dutch ancestors had bequeathed her with
+their other property,--was of New York Knickerbocker origin, now living
+with her uncle in Boston, and was by no means frivolous, though
+uncommonly lively. She had fine, brown eyes, beautiful hair, and a
+complexion that defied sun and wind. It had the rosy glow of health, and
+indicated a good digestion and high spirits. Mr. Desmond seemed to be
+mostly white vest, immaculate shirt-front, and gold chain, the
+last-named article being very heavy and meandering through the
+button-holes of his vest and up around his invisible neck. He said
+little, and was evidently not much given to light conversation. He was
+very gracious in his attentions to the ladies, however, and seemed to
+pay special deference to Mrs. Pinkerton. I afterwards learned that he
+was a widower of long standing, without chick or child, and the guardian
+of his niece, whom he regarded with great admiration.
+
+Down at the other end of the table was Marston, evidently giving vent
+to his impatience about something, and his wife, with fierce eyes,
+telling him, in manner if not in words, not to make a fool of himself.
+The rest of the company was made up either of transient visitors or of
+persons with whom this story has nothing in particular to do.
+
+As we emerged on the piazza after tea, Fred, who had impolitely gone out
+in advance, called out, "Charlie, old boy, come over here and have a
+smoke!"
+
+I must confess that these long sittings on the piazzas of summer hotels
+had lured me back to my old habits, which I had forsworn in my efforts
+to conciliate Bessie's mother. Bessie had encouraged me in it, for to
+tell the truth she rather liked the fragrance of a good cigar, and
+dearly loved to see me enjoying it. It was my nature to defy the whole
+world and be master of my own habits, but I had felt a mean inclination,
+after mother-in-law joined the party, to slink away and smoke on the
+sly. There was nothing for it now, however, but to put on a bold face,
+or play the hypocrite and pretend I didn't smoke. The latter I would
+not do, and if I had attempted it, it wouldn't go down with Fred, and I
+should have been in a worse predicament than ever. I went boldly across
+the piazza and took the proffered cigar. Glancing out at the corner of
+my eye as I was lighting it, I saw my mother-in-law regarding me through
+her glasses with increased disfavor. She did not, however, seem to be
+surprised, and doubtless believed me capable of any perfidy.
+
+"I say, Charlie, old boy, let's have a game of billiards," said Fred,
+after a few puffs. "I'll give you twenty points and beat you out of your
+boots." Now I was very fond of billiards, and usually didn't care who
+knew it, but Mrs. Pinkerton did not approve of the game, and had no
+knowledge that I indulged in it. But Fred would speak in that absurd
+shouting way of his, and all the ladies heard him. Again I mustered up
+resolution and went into the billiard room, but I played very
+indifferently, and was thinking all the time of my mother-in-law and her
+opinion of me. I really wanted to get into her good graces, but it
+required the sacrifice of all my own inclinations, and I despised a man
+who deliberately played the hypocrite to win anybody's favor.
+
+After two or three listless games I said to Fred, "I guess I will join
+the ladies." I was feeling some qualms of conscience for staying away
+from Bessie a whole hour at once.
+
+"Oh, hang the ladies!" was Fred's graceless response; "they can take
+care of themselves. My wife gets along well enough without me, I know,
+and yours will soon learn to be quite comfortable without your guardian
+presence; besides she's got her mother now. By the way, what a mighty
+grand old dowager Mrs. Pink is!"
+
+"Pinkerton is her name," I said, a little haughtily, as if resenting the
+liberty he took with my mother-in-law's cognomen.
+
+"Oh, yes, I know, but the name is too long; and besides, she reminds one
+of a full-blown pink, a little on the fade, perhaps, but still with a
+good deal of bloom about her. Is she going to live with you? Precious
+fine time you will have!" he added, having received his answer by a nod.
+"She'll boss the shebang, you bet!"
+
+"Oh, I guess not," I answered, not liking his slangy way of talking
+about my affairs, and resolving in my own mind that I would be master in
+my own house.
+
+"Well, then there'll be a fine old tussle for supremacy, and don't you
+forget it!"
+
+With this remark Fred wandered off down the dusty road, humming Madame
+Angot, and I drew up a chair by Bessie's side. She had evidently been
+wishing I would come. Mr. Desmond was sitting a little apart from the
+rest, twisting his fingers in his watch-chain and looking intently at
+the mountain-top opposite, as if expecting somebody to come over with a
+dispatch for him. Mrs. Pinkerton sat by her daughter's side in calm
+grandeur, her gray puffs--that fine silver-gray that comes prematurely
+on aristocratic brows--seeming like appendages of a queenly diadem. Miss
+Van had been diverting the company with a lively account of her day's
+adventures. She was always having adventures, and had a faculty of
+relating them that was little short of genius.
+
+"Well, my dear, are you having a good time?" I murmured in Bessie's ear.
+
+"Oh, yes; but I was feeling a little lonesome without you."
+
+The conversation degenerated into commonplace about the scenery and
+points of interest in the neighborhood, and after a while the company
+dispersed with polite good-evenings.
+
+When we reached our room, I remarked to Bessie, who seemed more quiet
+than usual, "I hope your mother will like it here."
+
+"Oh, yes, I guess she will like it when she has been here a little
+while," was the answer. "You know she has not been away from home much,
+of late years, except to the seaside with the Watsons and other of her
+old friends, and she does not adapt herself readily to strange company."
+
+I said nothing more, but was absorbed in thought about my mother-in-law.
+It is evident by this time that she was no ordinary woman, no coarse or
+waspish mother-in-law, but a woman of good breeding and the highest
+character. She was intelligent and well-informed, a consistent member of
+the Episcopal Church, with the highest views of propriety and a
+reverential regard for the rules of conduct laid down by good society.
+This made her all the harder to deal with. If she were a common or
+vulgar sort of mother-in-law, I could assert my prerogatives without
+compunction; and I was forced to admit that she was a very worthy woman,
+and not given to petty meddling, but I felt that her presence was an
+awful restraint. Without her we could have such good times, going and
+coming as we pleased, and acting with entire freedom; but she must be
+counted in, and was a factor that materially affected the result. She
+could not be ignored; her opinions could not be disregarded. That would
+be rude, and besides, their influence would make itself felt. Strange,
+the irresistible effect of a presence upon one! She might not openly
+interfere or directly oppose, but there she was, and she didn't approve
+of me or like my friends, could not fall in with my ways or my wishes,
+and make one of any company in which I should feel at ease, and I knew
+that her presence would be depressing, and spoil our summer's pleasure;
+and after that was over and we were at home, what? Well, sufficient unto
+the day is the evil thereof. We slept the sound sleep that mountain and
+country quiet brings, and took the chances of the future.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+THE RISE AND FALL.
+
+
+During the next week of our stay at the Fairview hotel, it grew rather
+dull. There was little to do but drive on the long country roads, or
+wander over the hills and in the fields and woods. I could have found
+plenty of pleasure in that with Bessie and a party of congenial friends,
+but it didn't seem to be right always to leave my worthy mother-in-law
+behind, with her crochet work or the last new novel from the city, on
+the sunny piazza or in her dim little chamber. She was not averse to
+drives, in fact enjoyed them very much, but she seemed to divine that I
+did not really want her company, though I protested, as became a dutiful
+son-in-law, that I should be very glad to take her at any time. She did
+go with us once or twice, but the laughter and romping behavior which
+gave our rides their chief zest were extinguished, and we jogged along
+in the most proper manner, professing admiration for the outlines of the
+hills and the far-away stretches of scenery between the more distant
+mountains. We returned as quiet and demure as if we had been to a
+funeral. Mrs. Pinkerton saw the effect, and with her fine feeling of
+independence, she politely but firmly declined to go afterwards. As for
+walking on anything but level sidewalks or gravel-paths, she could not
+think of such a thing. The idea of her climbing a hill or getting
+herself over a fence seemed ridiculous to anybody that knew her.
+
+So it was that we were continually forced to leave her behind, or deny
+ourselves the chief recreation of the country. I was sincerely
+disinclined to slight her in any way, and desirous of contributing to
+her pleasure, but what could I do? A fellow can't get an iceberg to
+enjoy tropical sunshine. Our dislike to leave the old lady alone,
+although she insisted that she didn't mind it at all, led us to pass a
+large portion of each day, sometimes all day, about the house. It was
+"deuced stupid," to use Marston's elegant phrase, but there was little
+to do for it. To be sure, there was Desmond, "old Dives," Fred called
+him. He seldom went out of sight of the house, but he had a perfect
+mail-bag of newspapers and letters every morning, and spent the forenoon
+indoors, holding sweet communion with them and answering his
+correspondents. In the afternoon he sat on the piazza by the hour,
+contemplating the mountain-top that had such a fascination for him. He
+had a prodigious amount of information on all manner of subjects, and a
+quick and accurate judgment; but he was generally very reticent, as he
+tipped back in his chair and twisted his fingers in and out of that fine
+gold chain. My mother-in-law, from her shady nook of the piazza, would
+glance at him occasionally from her work or her book, as much as to say,
+"It is strange people can't make some effort to be agreeable, instead of
+being so stiff and dignified all the afternoon"; but he seemed
+unconscious of her looks and her mental comments. His thoughts were
+probably in the marts of trade.
+
+Fred was continually going off to distant towns, or down to the great
+hotels in the mountains, for livelier diversion. His wife often insisted
+on going with him, to his evident disgust, not because she cared to be
+in his company, but because she wanted to go to the same places and
+could not well go alone. Now, Fred wasn't a bad fellow at heart. I had
+known him for years, and used to like him exceedingly. But he was left
+without a father at an early age, with a considerable fortune, and his
+mother was indulgent and not overwise. He got rather fast as he grew up,
+and then he contracted a thoughtless marriage with Lizzie Carleton, a
+handsome and stylish young lady, fond of dress and gay society, and
+without a notion of domestic responsibility or duty. Like most women who
+are not positively bad, she had in her heart a desire to be right, but
+she didn't know how. She was all impulse, and gave way to whims and
+feelings, as if helpless in any effort to manage her own waywardness. As
+a natural consequence there were constant jars between the pair. Fred
+took to his clubs and mingled with men of the race-course and the
+billiard halls, and Lizzie beguiled herself as best she could with her
+fashionable friends.
+
+And where was Miss Van Duzen these long and tedious days? They were
+never tedious to her, for she was always on the go. She would go off
+alone on interminable strolls, and bring back loads of flowers and
+strange plants, and she could tell all about them too. Her knowledge of
+botany was wonderful, and she could make very clever sketches; she would
+sit by the hour on some lonely rock, putting picturesque scenery on
+paper, just for the love of it; for when the pictures were done she
+would give them away or throw them away without the least compunction.
+She had a fine sense of the ludicrous and was all the time seeing funny
+things, which she described in a manner quite inimitable. She had grown
+up in New York, before her father's death, in the most select of
+Knickerbocker circles, but there was not a trace of aristocracy in her
+ways. She was sociable with the ostler and the office-boy, and agreeable
+to the neighboring farmers, talking with them with a spirit that quite
+delighted them. And yet there was nothing free and easy in her ways that
+encouraged undue familiarity. It was merely natural ease and good
+nature. She inspired respect in everybody but my mother-in-law, who was
+puzzled with her conduct, so different from her own ideas of propriety,
+and yet so free from real vulgarity. Mrs. Pinkerton could by no means
+approve of her, and yet she could accuse her of no offence which the
+most rigid could seriously censure.
+
+Miss Van was the life of the company when she was about, telling of her
+adventures, getting up impromptu amusements in the parlor, and planning
+excursions. She was the only person in the world, probably, who was
+quite familiar with Mr. Desmond, and she would sit on his knee, pull his
+whiskers, and call him an "awful glum old fogy," whereat he would laugh
+and say she had gayety enough for them both. He admired and loved her
+for the very qualities that he lacked.
+
+All this while I was trying to win the gracious favor of my
+mother-in-law, but it was up-hill work. She would answer me with severe
+politeness, and volunteer an occasional remark intended to be pleasant,
+but the moment I seemed to be gaining headway, a turn at billiards with
+Marston, for whom she had a great aversion, a thoughtless expression
+with a flavor of profanity in it, or my cigars, which I now indulged in
+without restraint, brought back her freezing air of disapproval.
+
+"Oh, dear!" I yawned sometimes, "why can't I go ahead and enjoy myself
+without minding that very respectable and severe old woman?" But I
+couldn't do it. I was always feeling the influence of those eyes, and
+even of her thoughts. I couldn't get away from it. Sunday came, and Mrs.
+Pinkerton expressed the hope that we were to attend divine service
+together. I hadn't thought of it till that moment, and then it struck me
+as a terrible bore. There was no church within ten miles except a little
+white, meek edifice in the neighboring village, occupied alternately by
+Methodist and Baptist expounders of a very Calvinistic, and, to me, a
+very unattractive sort of religion. It was not altogether to my
+mother-in-law's liking, but she regarded any church as far better than
+none.
+
+"I presume you will go, sir," she said, addressing me when I made no
+reply to the previous hint. She always used "sir," with a peculiar
+emphasis, when any suggestion was intended to have the force of a
+command.
+
+"Well, really, I had not thought about it," I said, rather vexed, as I
+secretly made up my mind, reckless of my policy of conciliation, that I
+would not go at any price. A tedious, droning sermon of an hour and
+perhaps an hour and a half in a country church, full of dismal
+doctrines,--the sermon, not the church,--I couldn't stand, I thought.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton's eyes were upon me, waiting for a more definite answer.
+"I--well, no, I don't think I really feel like it this morning. I
+thought I would read to Bessie quietly in our room, and take a rest."
+
+"Very well, sir," she said, "Bessie and I will walk down to the
+village."
+
+"The deuce you will!" I thought; "walk a mile and a half on a dusty
+road; to be bored!" I knew it was useless to protest, and I was too
+wilful to take back what I had said, have the team harnessed, and go,
+like a good fellow, to church. "No, I'll be blowed if I do!" I muttered.
+
+So off went the widow and her daughter without me. Bessie tripped around
+to me on the piazza, looking like a fairy in her white dress and bit of
+blue ribbon, gave me a sweet kiss, and said, "I'll be back before
+dinner. Have a nice quiet time, now."
+
+"Oh, yes; have a nice quiet time, and you gone off with that old
+dragon!" It was a wicked thought, for she was not a bit of a dragon, but
+the feeling came over me that I was going to feel miserable all the
+forenoon, and so I did. Miss Van and her uncle had gone early to the
+neighboring town, the largest in the county, for church and the
+opportunity of observing; Fred and his wife had gone, the night before,
+round to the other side of the mountains, where there was to be a sort
+of ball or hop at the leading hotel; and the rest of the people in the
+house might as well have been in the moon, for all that I cared about
+them. A nice quiet time! Oh, yes; lounging about and trying to think of
+something besides Mrs. Pinkerton and my own shabby behavior. I would ten
+times rather have been in the dullest country church that ever echoed to
+the voice of the old and unimproved theology of Calvin's day. But I was
+in for it, and lay in the hammock and looked through the stables, tried
+to read, tried to sleep, started on a walk and came back, and almost
+cursed the quiet country Sunday, as specially calculated to make a man
+of sense feel wretched.
+
+At last Bessie and her mother returned, and we had dinner. In the
+afternoon I was an outcast from Mrs. Pinkerton's favor, but I had Bessie
+and read to her, and, on the whole, got through the rest of the day
+comfortably.
+
+The week following I began to feel that this was getting tiresome. Under
+other circumstances it might be very pleasant, but really I began to
+doubt whether I was enjoying it. But I made up my mind that during these
+days of leisure I ought to be making progress in the favor of my
+mother-in-law, with whom I was destined to live, nobody could say how
+many years. I couldn't and wouldn't make a martyr or a hypocrite of
+myself. I wouldn't conceal my actions or deny myself freedom. So I
+smoked with Fred, played billiards, rolled ten-pins with Fred's wife and
+Miss Van, and even beguiled Bessie into that vigorous and healthful
+exercise, which brought a gentle reprimand from her mother, addressed to
+her but directed at me. She did not think that kind of amusement
+becoming to ladies who had a proper respect for themselves.
+
+"Why, mamma, Miss Van Duzen plays, and says she thinks it jolly fun,"
+said Bessie innocently.
+
+"That doesn't alter the case in the least," was the rejoinder. "Miss Van
+Duzen can judge for herself. I don't think it proper. Besides, your
+husband's familiar way with those ladies--one of whom is married and no
+better than she ought to be, if appearances mean anything--does not
+please me at all."
+
+"O mamma, how absurd! I see no harm in it at all, and poor Lizzie, I am
+sure, never means any harm."
+
+"Well, well, my dear, I don't wish to say anything about other people,
+and I only hope you will never have occasion to see any harm in your
+husband's evident preference for the company of people with loose
+notions about proper and becoming behavior."
+
+On Saturday of that week a little incident occurred that raised me
+perceptibly in Mrs. Pinkerton's estimation. The great, lumbering
+stage-coach came up just at evening, more heavily laden than usual, and
+top-heavy with trunks piled up on the roof. The driver dashed along with
+his customary recklessness, the six horses breaking into a canter as
+they turned to come up the rather steep acclivity to the house. The
+coach was drawn about a foot from its usual rut, one of the wheels
+struck a projecting stone, and over went the huge vehicle, passengers,
+trunks, and all. The driver took a terrible leap and was stunned. The
+horses stopped and looked calmly around on the havoc. There was great
+consternation in and about the house. Here my natural self-possession
+came into full play. I took command of the situation at once, directed
+prompt and vigorous efforts to the extrication of the passengers, had
+the injured ones taken into the house, applied proper restoratives, and
+in a few minutes ascertained that only one was seriously hurt. She was a
+young girl, who had insisted on riding outside, higher up even than the
+driver. She had been thrown headlong, striking, fortunately, on the
+grass, but terribly bruising one side of her face and dislocating her
+left shoulder. In a trice I had made her as comfortable as possible;
+dashed down to the village for the nearest doctor, having had the
+forethought to order a team harnessed in anticipation of such a
+necessity; and, having started the doctor up in a hurry, kept on to the
+neighboring county town for a surgeon who had considerable local
+reputation. I had him on the ground in a surprisingly short time, and
+before bedtime the unfortunate girl was put in the way of recovery,
+having received no internal injury.
+
+My behavior in this affair, as I said, gave me a lift in my
+mother-in-law's estimation, and of course filled Bessie with the most
+unbounded admiration, though I had never thought of the moral effect of
+my action. In the morning I determined to follow up my advantage. It was
+Sunday again, and I bespoke the team early, to go to the neighboring
+town, where there was an Episcopal church, and where, for that day, a
+distinguished divine from the city, who was spending his vacation in
+those parts, was to hold forth. When I had announced my preparation for
+the religious observance of the day, I actually received what was
+almost a smile of approval from my mother-in-law. I enjoyed the ride,
+and was not greatly bored by the service, for I was thinking of
+something else most of the time, or amusing my mind with the native
+congregation. We got back late to dinner, and the rest had left the
+dining-room. The ladies went in without removing their bonnets, and
+after dinner retired to their rooms.
+
+As I came out on the piazza, Fred, who was walking about in a restless
+way, puffing his cigar with a sort of ferocity, as though determined to
+put it through as speedily as possible, shouted, "Hello! Charlie, old
+boy, where the eternal furies have you been? Here I have been about this
+dead, sleepy, stupid place all the morning, with nothing to do and
+nobody to speak to!"
+
+"Why, where's Mrs. M.?"
+
+"Lib? Oh, she's been here, but then she was reading a ghastly stupid
+novel, and wasn't company; and she went off to the big boarding-house
+down the road half a mile, to dine with a friend. I wouldn't go to the
+blasted place, and really think she didn't want me to. But where in
+thunder were you all the while?"
+
+"At church, to be sure, with my wife and her mother."
+
+"Oh, yes!" was the reply, peculiarly prolonged, as if the idea never
+occurred to him before. "How long since you became so pious, old man?
+Didn't suppose you knew what the inside of a church was used for. The
+outside is mainly useful to put a clock on, where it can be seen. Old
+Pink,--beg pardon! Mrs. Pinkerton,--I suppose, dragged you along by main
+force."
+
+"Not at all. I went of my own motion; in fact, suggested it to the
+ladies."
+
+"You don't say so! Well, I see she is bringing you around. It is she
+that is destined to gain the supremacy."
+
+"Pshaw! Is my going to church such an indication of submission? It
+wouldn't do you any harm to go to church once in a while, Fred."
+
+"Well, I don't know about that," he said, taking out his cigar, and
+stretching his feet to the top of the balustrade; "I don't know about
+that. I am afraid it might be the ruin of me. I might become awfully
+pious, and then what a stick and a moping man of rags I should become. I
+tell you, Charlie, my boy, there's many a good fellow spoilt by too
+much church and Sunday school."
+
+"Perhaps," I replied, "but you and I are beyond danger."
+
+"Well, yes, but you can't be too careful of yourself, you know."
+
+There was no answering that, and we relapsed into commonplace, and
+finished our cigars.
+
+"Where's old Dives to-day, and his charming niece, the lively Van?"
+asked Fred, after an uncommon fit of silent contemplation.
+
+"They went over to some town thirty or forty miles away, yesterday, and
+haven't got back," I replied.
+
+"I tell you, that girl knows how to circumvent these stupid Sundays,
+don't she, though? And she takes old Dives along wherever she wants to
+go. I believe she would take him where the other Dives went, if she was
+disposed to take a trip there herself. But, holy Jerusalem! what are we
+to do to get through the rest of the day. No company, no billiards, no
+fishing. Confound the prejudices of society. I tell you, it is just such
+women as that mother-in-law of yours that keep society intimidated, as
+it were, into artificial proprieties. Now where's the harm of a pleasant
+game on a Sunday, more than sitting here and grumbling and cursing
+because there's nothing to do?"
+
+I made no reply, and Fred lighted another cigar. He was evidently
+thinking of something. "Look here, old fellow," he said at length in an
+undertone, something very unusual with him, "come up to my room. You
+haven't seen it. Lib won't be back till teatime, and perhaps we can find
+something to amuse ourselves."
+
+He led the way and I followed, thinking no harm. His room was up stairs
+and on the back of the house, looking up the great hill that stretched
+back to the clouds. As we entered, I found he had brought a good many
+things with him, and given the room much the air of the quarters of a
+bachelor in the city. His sleeping-room was separate from that, and
+formed a sort of boudoir for his wife. He motioned me to an easy-chair,
+set a box of fine cigars on the table, and going to the closet brought
+out a decanter of sherry and some glasses.
+
+"In these cursed places, you can get nothing to drink," he said,
+"unless on the sly, and I hate that; so I bring along my own beverages,
+you see."
+
+I saw and tasted, and found it very good. He was still fumbling about
+the closet, with profane ejaculations, and finally emerged with
+something in his hand that I at first took for a small book. But he
+unblushingly put on the table that pasteboard volume sometimes called
+the Devil's Bible. "Come," he said, "where's the harm? Let us have a
+quiet game of Casino or California Jack, or something else. It is better
+than perishing of stupidity."
+
+I demurred. I was not over-scrupulous, but I had sufficient of my early
+breeding left to have a qualm of conscience at the thought of playing
+cards on Sunday.
+
+"Oh, nonsense!" said Fred, carelessly, as he proceeded to deal the cards
+for Casino. "There, you have an ace and little Casino right before you.
+Go ahead, old man!"
+
+I made a feeble show of protesting, but took up my cards, and, finding
+that I could capture the ace and little Casino, took them. From that the
+play went on; I became quite absorbed, and dismissed my scruples, when,
+as the sun was getting low, a shadow passed the window.
+
+"Great Jupiter!" I exclaimed, looking up. "Does that second-story piazza
+go all the way round here?"
+
+"To be sure," answered Fred, whose back was to the window. "Why not?
+What did you see,--a spook?"
+
+"My mother-in-law!"
+
+"The devil!"
+
+"No, Mrs. Pinkerton!"
+
+"Well, what do you care? You are your own boss, I hope."
+
+"Yes, of course; but she will be terribly offended, and I think it would
+be pleasanter for all concerned to keep in her good graces."
+
+"Gammon! Assert your rights, be master of yourself, and teach the old
+woman her place. D---- me, if I would have a mother-in-law riding over
+me, or prying around to see what I was about!"
+
+"Oh, I am sure she passed the window by accident. She would never pry
+around; it isn't her style; she has a fine sense of propriety, has my
+mother-in-law!"
+
+"Oh, yes, old Pink is the pink of propriety, no doubt about that!" said
+the rascal, laughing heartily at his heartless pun.
+
+But I couldn't laugh. I saw plainly enough that I had lost more than all
+the ground that I had gained in my mother-in-law's favor, and my task
+would be harder than ever. I had no more desire to play cards, and
+sauntered down stairs and out of doors as if nothing had happened. At
+the tea-table Mrs. Pinkerton was very impressive in her manner, but
+showed no direct consciousness of anything new. On the piazza, after
+tea, she was uncommonly affable to her daughter, and, I thought, a
+little disposed to keep Bessie from talking to me. The latter appeared
+troubled somewhat, and looked at me in an anxious way, as if longing to
+rush into my arms and ask me all about it and say how willingly she
+forgave me; but her mother kept her within the circle of her influence,
+and I sat apart, harboring unutterable thoughts and saying nothing. At
+last Mrs. Pinkerton arose, and said sweetly, "I wouldn't stay out any
+later, dear, it is rather damp."
+
+"Stay with me, Bessie," I said, "I want to speak to you. Your mother is
+at liberty to go in whenever she pleases." It was then she gave me a
+disdainful look and swept in, and I muttered the wish regarding her
+transportation to a distant clime, which brought out the gentle rebuke
+with which this story opens.
+
+I saw no prospect of enjoying a longer stay at the Fairview, unless some
+burglary or terrible accident should occur to give me chance for a new
+display of my heroic qualities, and even then, I thought, it would be of
+no use, for I should spoil it all next day. So we determined to go home
+a week earlier than we had intended. The Marstons were going to Canada
+and Lake George, and wouldn't reach home till October. Mr. Desmond and
+his niece stayed a month longer where they were, and that would bring
+them home about the same time. Bessie and I went home with a lack of
+that buoyant bliss with which we had travelled to the mountains and
+spent those first two weeks. There was no change in us, but it was all
+due to my mother-in-law.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+WHAT IS HOME WITHOUT A MOTHER-IN-LAW?
+
+
+Home! We were back from the mountains, and our brief wedding-journey had
+become a thing of the past. Mrs. Pinkerton's iron-bound trunk had been
+reluctantly deposited in her bed-chamber by a puffing and surly
+hack-driver; and here was I, installed in the little cottage as head of
+the household, for weal or for woe. It was Mrs. Pinkerton's cottage, to
+be sure, but I entered it with the determination not to live there as a
+boarder or as a guest subject to the proprietor's condescending
+hospitality. I was able and not unwilling to establish a home of my own,
+and inasmuch as I refrained from doing so because of Mrs. Pinkerton's
+desire to keep her daughter with her, I had the right to consider myself
+under no obligation to my mother-in-law.
+
+The cottage was far from being a disagreeable place in itself. It was
+small, but extremely neat and pleasant. The rooms were furnished with a
+degree of quiet taste that defied criticism. The hand of an accomplished
+housekeeper was everywhere made manifest, and everything had an air of
+refinement and comfort. There was no ostentatious furniture; the chairs
+were made to sit in, but not to put one's boots on. The cleanliness of
+the house was terrible. One could see that no man had lived there since
+the death of the late Pinkerton.
+
+Our room was the same that had been occupied by Bessie since she was a
+school-girl in short frocks. It was full of Bessie's "things," and it
+was lucky that my effects occupied but very little space.
+
+"This is jolly," I said, as I sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled
+a cigar from my pocket. "How soon will supper be ready, I wonder?"
+
+There was no response. Bessie was unpacking,--and such an unpacking!
+
+I lighted my cigar and threw myself back on the bed, wondering how they
+had got on without me at the bank. Presently in came mother-in-law to
+lend a hand at the unpacking. She did not see me at first, but the
+fragrance of my Manila soon reached her nostrils, and she turned.
+
+Such a look as she cast upon me! It almost took my breath away. But she
+did not say a word. "The subject is beyond her powers of speech," I said
+to myself. "Let us hope it will be so as a general thing."
+
+However, it made me feel uncomfortable, so by and by I got off the bed
+and went down stairs.
+
+At the supper-table I tried to make myself as agreeable as possible. I
+talked over the trip, and spoke of the people we had met at the
+mountains; but I had most of the conversation to myself. Bessie did not
+seem to be in a mood to chat; Mrs. Pinkerton devoted herself to impaling
+me with her eyes once in a while; in a word, the mental atmosphere was
+muggy.
+
+"Desmond has travelled a great deal," I said. "I was speaking of French
+politics the other day, and he gave me a long harangue on the situation.
+He was in Paris several years, when he was a good deal younger than he
+is now."
+
+"Mr. Desmond is not a very old man," said Mrs. Pinkerton, "but he has
+passed that age when men think they know all there is to be known."
+
+I accepted this shot good-naturedly, and laughed.
+
+"His niece is a remarkably bright girl," I continued. "Don't you think
+so?"
+
+"I cannot say I think it either bright or proper for a young lady to go
+off alone on mountain excursions for half a day, and return with her
+dress torn and her hands all scratched."
+
+"Well, it was rather imprudent, but you know she said she had no
+intention of going so far when she started, and she missed her way."
+
+"I did not hear her excuses. She appeared to be a spoiled child, and her
+manners were insufferably offensive. I should have known she came from
+New York, even if I had not been told."
+
+"Do you think all New-Yorkers are loud?"
+
+"I said no such thing. There is a class of New York young people who are
+so 'loud' that respectable people cannot have anything to do with them
+without lowering themselves. Miss Van Duzen belongs to that class."
+
+"You are rough on her, upon my word. I don't think she's half so bad,
+do you, Bessie?"
+
+"I liked her very much," said Bessie. "She may not be our style exactly,
+but I think at heart she is a good, true girl."
+
+"I wonder if she will call," I said. "By the way, Fred Marston is coming
+out to see us as soon as he gets back to the city."
+
+"As to that young man," Mrs. Pinkerton remarked, with some show of
+vivacity, "he impressed me as being little less than disreputable."
+
+"Disreputable! I would have you understand that Fred Marston is one of
+my friends," I exclaimed, growing angry, "and he is as respectable as
+the rector of St. Thomas's Church!"
+
+Phew! Now I had done it. Mrs. Pinkerton was thoroughly scandalized and
+offended. She got up, and we left the table, Bessie looking troubled. I
+went into the library, and after lighting a cigar, sat down to read the
+papers. Bessie, who had followed me, brushed the journal out of my hand
+and seated herself on my knee.
+
+"Charlie," she said, kissing me, and smoothing the hair away from my
+brow, "can't you and mamma ever get along any better than this?"
+
+"A conundrum! I never guessed one, so I shall have to give this up. But
+don't you see how it is, dearest? I try to be good to her, and she won't
+meet me half-way. On the contrary, she tries to nag me, I think. It
+wasn't my fault to-night. What right has she to run down my friends? If
+she don't like them, she might leave them alone, and be precious sure
+they'd leave her alone. She don't like smoking; I tried to swear off,
+tried mighty hard, but it was no use. You see--"
+
+"It wasn't quite necessary for you to make that remark about the Rev.
+Dr. McCanon, was it, Charlie?"
+
+"Well, no; I'm sorry, but she provoked me to it. I'll apologize."
+
+"And then, Charlie, you will try to be a little more patient with mamma,
+won't you?"
+
+"Yes, I do try, but the trouble is that she don't like me. Must I keep
+my mouth shut, throw away my cigars, bounce all my friends, and sit up
+with my arms folded?"
+
+"Oh, no, dear. Be good to her, and be patient; it will all come around
+right in time."
+
+That was Bessie's way of lightening present troubles,--"It will all come
+around right in time." Blessed hope! "Man never is, but always to be
+blest."
+
+My duties now kept me at the bank nearly all day, and for a few weeks
+affairs went on at home very smoothly. At table Mrs. Pinkerton
+maintained a sphinx-like silence, and I directed my conversation to
+Bessie. When the old lady opened her mouth, it was to snub me. The snub
+direct, the snub indirect, the snub implied, and the snub
+far-fetched,--I submitted to all with a cheerful spirit, and not a hasty
+retort escaped me.
+
+At Bessie's request, I now smoked only in the library, or in our own
+room. I bought a highly ornamental Japanese affair, of curious
+workmanship, as a receptacle for cigar-ashes. Altogether, I behaved like
+a good boy.
+
+One evening Marston dropped in. When his card was brought up stairs, I
+handed it over to Bessie, and hurried to the library.
+
+"How are you, old man?" he said, or, rather, shouted. "How do you like
+it, as far as you've got?"
+
+"Tip-top. I'm glad to see you. When did you get back?"
+
+"Last Saturday, and mighty glad to get back to a live place, too.
+Smoke?"
+
+"Thank you. Bessie will be down in a minute."
+
+"How's old Pink?"
+
+"S-s-h! She's all right. Don't speak so confoundedly loud."
+
+"Ha, ha! I see how it is. By and by you won't dare say your soul's your
+own. I pity you, Charlie, upon my word I do. Ned Tupney was married a
+few days ago, did you know it? and he's got a devil of a mother-in-law
+on his hands, a regular roarer--"
+
+"Here comes my wife," I broke in. "For Heaven's sake, change the
+subject. Talk about roses!"
+
+Bessie entered and exchanged a friendly greeting with Fred.
+
+"I was telling Charlie about some wonderful roses I saw at Primton's
+green-house," said the unabashed visitor, and he forthwith laid aside
+his cigar--on the tablecloth!--and launched into a glowing description
+of the imaginary flowers.
+
+Before he had finished, Mrs. Pinkerton entered much to my surprise. She
+bowed in a stately manner, inquired formally as to the state of Fred's
+health, and as she took a seat I saw her glance take in that cigar.
+
+Fred could talk exceedingly well when he was so disposed, and he
+entertained us excellently, I thought. He had seen a good deal of the
+world, was a close observer, and had the faculty of chatting in a
+fascinating way about subjects that would usually be called commonplace.
+He was pleased with the aspect of the cottage, and complimented it
+gracefully.
+
+"Love in a cottage," he sighed, casting a quick glance around the
+room,--"well, it isn't so bad after all, with plenty of books, a
+pleasant garden, sunny rooms, a pretty view, and a mother-in-law to look
+after a fellow and keep him straight." And the wretch looked at Mrs.
+Pinkerton, and laughed in a sociable way.
+
+I promptly called his attention to a beautiful edition of Thackeray's
+works in the bookcase, a recent purchase.
+
+In the course of a half-hour's call, Fred managed to introduce the
+dangerous topic at least a half-dozen times, and each time I was
+compelled to choke him off by ramming some other subject down his throat
+willy-nilly.
+
+Finally he rose to go. I accompanied him to the front door.
+
+"Sociable creature, old Pink, eh?" he said. "Doesn't love me too well.
+Is she always as festive and amusing as to-night?"
+
+"Hold on a minute," was my reply. I ran back and got my hat and cane,
+and accompanied him toward the railroad station.
+
+"See here, Fred," I said, "your intentions are good, but I wish you
+would quit talking about Mrs. Pinkerton. I am doing my best to live
+peaceably and comfortably in the same house with her, and you don't help
+me a bit with your gabble. She is a very worthy woman, and not half so
+stupid as you imagine. I admit that we don't get along together quite as
+I could wish, but I'm trying to please my wife by being as good a son
+as I can be to her mother. What's the use of trying to rile up our
+little puddle?"
+
+"Oh, all right!" he rejoined. "If you prefer your puddle should be
+stagnant--admirable metaphor, by the way--it shall be as you wish. Only
+I hate to see the way things are going with you, and I'm bound to tell
+you so. You are losing your spirit, tying your hands, and throwing all
+your manly independence to the winds. If you live two years with that
+irreproachable mummy, you won't be worth knowing. Do you dare go into
+town with me and have a game of billiards?"
+
+I went. We had several games. I got home about midnight. The next
+morning, at the breakfast-table, Mrs. Pinkerton said dryly,--
+
+"Your friend Marston pities you, doesn't he?"
+
+"I don't know; if he does, he wastes his emotions," I replied.
+
+"I am glad you think so. He takes a good deal of interest in your
+welfare, and I suppose he could be prevailed upon to give you wise
+advice in case of need."
+
+"I dare say. Fred is a good fellow, and advice is as cheap as dirt."
+
+"And pity?"
+
+"Pity! Why do you think Fred pities me? Why should he pity me?"
+
+"Your question is hypocritical, because you know very well that he
+thinks you are a victim,--a victim of a terrible mother-in-law."
+
+It was the first time she had ever spoken out so openly. I said,--
+
+"We will leave it to Bessie. Bessie, do I look like a victim?"
+
+"No," said Bessie, "but you are both the queerest puzzles! Mamma is
+always her dearest self when you are away, Charlie. You don't know each
+other at all yet. When you are together you are both horrid, and when
+you are apart you are both lovely. And yet I don't know why it should be
+so; there is no quarrel between you--and--and--"
+
+And Bessie began to cry. I got up.
+
+"No, there's no quarrel between us," I said; "but perhaps a straight-out
+row would be better than forever to be eating our own vitals with
+suppressed rancor."
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton made as if she would go around to where Bessie sat, to
+condole with her, without noticing my remark.
+
+"No, don't trouble yourself," I cried. "It's my place to comfort my
+wife." And I took Bessie in my arms tenderly, and kissed her
+tear-stained cheek almost fiercely.
+
+This theatrical demonstration caused my mother-in-law to sweep out of
+the room promptly, with her temper as nearly ruffled as I had ever seen
+it.
+
+"O Charlie!" whimpered my poor little wife despairingly, "what shall I
+do? It's awful to have you and mamma this way!"
+
+And now it was my turn to say, "Cheer up, my love! It will all come
+around right in time."
+
+But my _arrire pense_ was, "Would that that burglar had bagged the old
+iceberg, and carried her off to her native Nova Zembla!"
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+MISS VAN'S PARTY AND ANOTHER UNPLEASANTNESS.
+
+
+One day in the early fall, Mrs. Pinkerton received a letter postmarked
+at Paris, which seemed to throw her into a state of extraordinary
+excitement. I knew her well enough to be certain that she would not tell
+me the news, but that I should hear it later through Bessie. Such was
+the case. When I came home towards evening and went up stairs to prepare
+for supper, Bessie, who was seated in our room, said in a joyful tone,--
+
+"George is coming home next month!"
+
+"That's good," I said; and the more I thought of it the better it
+seemed. A new element would be infused into our home life with his
+advent, and I confidently believed that the widow's society would be
+vastly more tolerable when he was among us. George had been so long in
+Paris that he had become a veritable Parisian. That he would bring
+along with him a large amount of Paris sunshine and vivacity to enliven
+the atmosphere of our little circle, I felt certain.
+
+"Is he coming to stay?" I asked.
+
+"He don't know. He says he never makes any plans for six months ahead.
+It will depend upon circumstances."
+
+"Well, that's Parisian. I'm very glad he's coming, and I hope
+circumstances will keep him here. Isn't old Dr. Jones pretty nearly
+dead? Seems to me George could take his practice."
+
+"Now, Charlie!"
+
+"It's all right, puss; doctors must die as well as their patients."
+
+I broached the subject to mother-in-law at the supper-table,
+and--_mirabile dictu!_--she agreed with me that we must keep George with
+us when we got him.
+
+In November George arrived. He didn't telegraph from New York, but came
+right on by a night train, and, walking into the house while we were at
+breakfast, took us by surprise.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton taken by surprise was a funny phenomenon, and I'm afraid
+propriety received a pretty smart blow when she threw her napkin into a
+plate of buckwheat cakes, dropped her eye-glasses, and rushed to meet
+the long-lost prodigal.
+
+As for George, he brought such a gale into the house with him--there are
+plenty of them on the Atlantic in November--that everything seemed
+metamorphosed. He laughed and shouted, and hugged first one of us and
+then another, and finally sat down and ate breakfast enough for six
+Frenchmen, every minute ripping out some wicked little French oath and
+winking at his mother with the utmost complacency. Never since I had
+become an inmate of the cottage had we enjoyed a meal so much as that
+one. There was an _abandon_, an _insouciance_, an _esprit_, a
+_je-ne-sais-quoi_ about this young frog-eater that thoroughly carried
+away the whole party, including even Mrs. Pinkerton.
+
+When George had eaten everything he could find on the table, he lighted
+a cigarette,--right there in the dining-room, too, and under his
+mother's eyes,--and we had a good, long, jolly talk together, Bessie
+sitting between us and feasting her eyes on her brother's comeliness.
+He certainly was handsome.
+
+"I have no plans," he said, "except to loaf here awhile and wait for an
+opening."
+
+"A French Micawber," said I. "And I suppose you know all about medicine
+and surgery?"
+
+"I have learned when not to give medicine, I believe, and so, I think, I
+can save lots of lives."
+
+A few days after George's arrival we received a call from the Watsons. I
+had never had the pleasure of meeting the Watsons, but I had had the
+Watsons held up before me as examples of the right sort of style so many
+times, that I felt already well acquainted with them.
+
+Mr. Watson was a very retiring, quiet little man, awed into obscurity by
+his wife. After a long and persistent effort to interest him in
+conversation, I was compelled to give it up, and to leave him smiling
+blankly, with his gaze directed toward the Argand burner.
+
+Mrs. Watson was immense in every sense of the word. Her moral and mental
+dimensions were awe-inspiring; and she delivered what I afterwards
+found, on reflection, to be very commonplace utterances in a style in
+which unction, dogmatism, self-satisfaction, and finality were
+predominant. Once, when she had brought forth an unusually imposing
+sentence, her husband fairly smacked his lips.
+
+The Watsons had no children. They were among the most prominent
+attendants of St. Thomas's, and the old gentleman was reputed to be
+worth about a million.
+
+George came in while the call was in progress, and after greeting the
+Watsons, he turned to Mrs. W., and uttered one of the most polished,
+delicate, pleasing little compliments it has ever been my fortune to
+hear uttered. Then he quietly withdrew into the background.
+
+Just then some more callers were announced, and what was my surprise to
+see Mr. Desmond and Miss Van Duzen enter. The former was as resplendent
+as to his watch-chain as ever, and his niece looked charming.
+Introductions all round followed, and the company broke up into groups.
+
+George took a seat near Miss Van, and a brisk fire of conversation was
+soon under way between them, varied by frequent bursts of friendly
+laughter.
+
+Mr. Desmond soon drew out Mr. Watson, and their talk was on stocks,
+bonds, and the like.
+
+After Mrs. Watson had proved her theory of the laws of the universe, and
+had almost intoxicated my worthy mother-in-law with her glittering
+rhetoric, the Watsons took their departure. Before the others followed
+their example, Miss Van extended an informal invitation to us to attend
+a "social gathering" at her uncle's residence the following Wednesday
+evening.
+
+We went, of course, Mrs. Pinkerton, George, Bessie, and I. It was a
+pleasant party, and it could not have been otherwise with Miss Van as
+the hostess. There was a little dancing,--not enough to entitle it to be
+called a dancing-party; a little card-playing,--not enough to make it a
+card-party; and there was a vast amount of bright and pleasant
+conversation, but still one could not name it a _converzatione_. The
+company was remarkably good, and Miss Van's management, although
+imperceptible, was so skilful that her guests found themselves at their
+ease, and enjoying themselves, without knowing that their pleasure was
+more than half due to her _finesse_.
+
+George was quite a lion, and I envied his easy tact, his unconscious
+grace of manner, and his faculty of saying bright things without effort.
+He and Miss Van got on famously together, and she found him an efficient
+and trustworthy aid in her capacity as hostess.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton made a lovely wall-flower, and I could not refrain from a
+wicked chuckle when I saw her sitting on a sofa, exchanging commonplaces
+with a puffing dowager. Presently, however, I noticed that she had gone,
+and I found that Mr. Desmond had been kind enough to relieve me from the
+onerous duty of taking her down to supper.
+
+I wish I had a printed bill of fare of that supper, for even George,
+fresh from Vfour's and the Trois Frres Provenaux, acknowledged that
+it was sublime, magnificent, perfect. We men folks, in fact, talked so
+much about it afterwards, that Bessie rebuked us by remarking that "men
+didn't care about anything so much as eating."
+
+As Fred Marston remarked to me, while helping himself a third time to
+the salad, "It's a stunning old lay-out, isn't it!" His wife was there,
+dressed "to kill," as he himself said, and dancing with every gentleman
+she could decoy into asking her.
+
+After we had come up from the supper-room, Fred Marston pulled me into a
+corner, and inflicted on me a volley of stinging observations about the
+people in the room. George, Bessie, Mrs. Pinkerton, and Miss Van were, I
+supposed, in one of the other rooms; I had lost sight of them.
+
+"Old Jenks lost a cool hundred thousand fighting the tiger at Saratoga,
+this last summer," said Fred. "I had it from a man who backed him. Do
+you know that young widow talking with him near the end of the piano?
+No? Why, that's Mrs. Delascelles, and a devil of a little piece she
+is,--twice divorced and once widowed, and she isn't a day over
+twenty-five. You ought to know her. By the way, that brother of yours is
+a whole team, with a bull-pup under the wagon. Does he let old Pink boss
+him around as she does you?"
+
+"It's a fine night," I said.
+
+"Delightful! I say, Charlie, it must be a terrible bore to lug the old
+woman around to all these shindigs with you, hey?"
+
+"What do you think about the State election?" I demanded.
+
+"The Republicans have got a dead sure thing, I'll lay you a V. She has
+bulldozed you till you don't dare open your head, my boy. Yours is one
+of the saddest and most malignant cases of mother-in-law I ever struck."
+
+"Fred," I said, in hopes of bringing his tirade to an end, "your
+friendship is slightly oppressive. Confine your attentions to your own
+grievances. I will take care of mine."
+
+"Ah! at last you acknowledge that you have one. Confess, now, that old
+Pink is a confounded nuisance!"
+
+"Well, then, yes, she is! Does that satisfy you, scandal-monger? Now,
+for Heaven's sake, shut up!"
+
+I heard a brisk rustling of silk just at my left and a little back of
+where I sat, and some one passed toward the front parlor.
+
+"By Jove!" ejaculated Fred, looking intently. "It's old Pink herself,
+and I hope she got the benefit of what we said about her. I had no idea
+she was sitting near us."
+
+"What _we_ said about her!" I repeated. "I didn't say anything about
+her."
+
+"Yes, you did. Ha, ha! You said she was a confounded nuisance!"
+
+I shuddered.
+
+"Oh, well, brace up! Perhaps she didn't hear that impious remark," said
+Fred, chuckling maliciously. "Or if she did, perhaps she'll let you off
+easy: only a few hours in the dark closet, or bread and water for a day
+or two."
+
+"Confound your mischief-making tongue!" I growled. "Here comes Miss Van
+Duzen to bid you quit spreading scandal about her guests."
+
+Miss Van Duzen, on the contrary, only wished Mr. Marston to secure a
+partner for the Lanciers, which he promptly did.
+
+I sat brooding while the dancing went on, and was somewhat astonished,
+when it was over, to see George making for my corner.
+
+"How's this?" he said. "Didn't you go home with them?"
+
+"With them? What! You don't mean to say--"
+
+"But I do, though! Bessie and mother made their adieux half an hour
+ago, and I thought of course you had gone home with them, as nothing was
+said to me. This is a pretty go! Bessie must have been ill."
+
+"Nonsense!" I exclaimed. "I should have known if that was the case.
+Where's Miss Van?"
+
+"I saw her. She thought it was odd, but supposed you had gone with them.
+What could have started them off in that fashion?"
+
+"Well, well, don't let's stand here talking. Come on."
+
+We did not stop for ceremony. Rushing up stairs, we donned our hats and
+coats, and made our way out to the sidewalk without losing any time. I
+hailed a carriage, and we drove rapidly out of town. It was about half
+past one o'clock when we arrived home. There were lights in our room and
+in Mrs. Pinkerton's chamber. George followed me up stairs, and I tapped
+at the door of our room.
+
+"Is it you, Charlie?" said Bessie's voice.
+
+"Yes,--and George."
+
+She opened the door. It was evidently not long since their arrival
+home, for she had not begun to undress.
+
+"Explain, for our benefit, the new method of leaving a party," said
+George, "and why it was deemed necessary to give us a scare in
+inaugurating the same." He threw himself into an easy-chair.
+
+"Perhaps Mr. Travers is better able to tell you why mother should have
+left in the way she did," said Bessie, trying to make her speech sound
+sarcastic and cutting, but finding it a difficult job, with her breath
+coming and going so quickly.
+
+"The deuce he is!" roared George. "Come, Charlie, what have you been up
+to? I must get it out of some of you."
+
+"I am utterly unable to tell you why your mother should have left in the
+way she did," was all I could find to say.
+
+"Sapristi! This is getting mysterious and blood-curdling. The latest
+_feuilleton_ is nothing to it. Must I go to bed without knowing the
+cause of this escapade? Well, so be it. But let me tell you, young
+woman, that it wasn't the thing to do. If you find your husband flirting
+with some siren, you must lead him off by the ear next time, but don't
+sulk. Good night."
+
+George walked out and shut the door after him.
+
+"See here, Bessie," I said kindly, "don't cry, because I want to talk
+sensibly with you."
+
+She was sobbing now in good earnest.
+
+"I want you to tell me what your mother said to you about me."
+
+She couldn't talk just then, poor little woman! But when she had had her
+cry partly out, she told me.
+
+Her mother had not told her a word of what had passed between Fred
+Marston and me! The outraged dignity of the widow would not admit of an
+explicit account of the unspeakable insult she had received. She had
+simply given Bessie to understand that I had uttered some unpardonable,
+infamous slander, and had hustled the poor girl breathlessly into a cab
+and away, before she fairly realized what had happened.
+
+I then told Bessie what our conversation had been, and left her to judge
+for herself. I had not the heart to scold her for her part in the French
+leave-taking, though it made me feel miserable to think how few
+episodes of such a sort might bring about endless misunderstandings and
+heart-aches.
+
+Of course more or less talk was caused by the mysterious manner of our
+several departures from Miss Van's party; and, thanks to Fred Marston
+and his wife and similar rattle-pates, it became generally known that
+there was a skeleton in the Pinkerton closet.
+
+Miss Van soon heard how it came about, and nothing could have afforded a
+more complete proof of her refinement of character than the delicacy and
+tact with which she ignored the whole affair.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII.
+
+ANOTHER CHARLIE IN THE FIELD.
+
+
+The winter, with its petty trials and contentions, had gone by; spring,
+with its bloom and fragrance, was far advanced; and already another
+summer, with its possible pleasures and recreations, was close upon us.
+Before it had fairly set in, however, an event of extraordinary
+importance was to occur in our little household. There had been
+premonitions of it for some time, which had a tendency to soften and
+soothe all asperities, and cause a rather sober and subdued air to
+pervade the little cottage, and now there were active preparations going
+on. Of course, the widow was gradually assuming the management of the
+whole affair, and it was a matter in which I could hardly venture to
+dispute her right. Her experience and knowledge were certainly superior
+to mine, and it was an affair in which these qualities were very
+important. In fact, I seemed to be counted out altogether in the
+preparations, as if it was something in the nature of a surprise party
+in my honor. Mrs. Pinkerton had an air of mysterious and exclusive
+knowledge concerning the grand event. Miss Van, who had come to have
+confidential relations with Bessie, of the most intimate kind,
+notwithstanding the mother's objections, knew all about it, but had a
+queer way of appearing unconscious of anything unusual. There seemed to
+be a general consent to a shallow pretence that I was in utter and
+hopeless ignorance. It annoyed me a little, as I flattered myself that I
+knew quite as much about what was coming as any of them, and I thought
+it silly to make believe I didn't, and to ignore my interest in the
+affair. Bessie had no secrets from me, of course, and our understanding
+was complete, but one might have thought from appearances that we had
+less concern in the matter than anybody else.
+
+As the auspicious time drew near, the goings-on increased in mystery and
+the widow's control grew more and more complete. Bessie showed me one
+day a wardrobe that amused me immensely. It was quite astonishing in
+its extent and variety, but so liliputian in the dimensions of the
+separate garments as to seem ridiculous to me.
+
+"Aren't they cunning?" said the dear girl, holding up one after another
+of the various articles of raiment. Then she showed me a basket,
+marvellously constructed, with a mere skeleton of wicker-work and
+coverings of pink silk and fine lace, and furnished with toilet
+appliances that seemed to belong to a fairy; and finally, removing a big
+quilt that had excited my curiosity, she showed me the most startling
+object of all,--a cradle! I had seen such things before and felt no
+particular thrill, but this had a strange effect upon me. I didn't stop
+to inquire how these things had all been smuggled into the house without
+my knowledge or consent, but kissed my little wife fondly, and went down
+stairs in a musing and pensive mood.
+
+The next day a decree of virtual exile was pronounced upon me. My
+mother-in-law thought perhaps it would be better if I would occupy
+another room in the house for a time, and let her share Bessie's
+chamber. The poor, dear girl might need her care at any time, and the
+widow looked at me as much as to say, "You cannot be expected to know
+anything about these matters, and have nothing to do but obey my
+directions." I consented without a murmur or the least show of
+resistance, for I admitted everything that could possibly be said, and
+lost all my spirit of independence in view of the impressive event that
+was coming. So I meekly took to the attic, and put up with the most
+forlorn and desolate quarters. One or two mornings after, I was aroused
+at an inhuman hour, and ordered in the most imperative tones to call in
+Dr. Lyman as quickly as possible, and haste after Mrs. Sweet. I hurried
+into my clothes in the utmost agitation, raced down the street in a
+manner that led a watchful policeman to stop me and inquire my business,
+rung up the doctor with the most unbecoming violence, and delivered my
+errand up a speaking-tube, in answer to his muffled, "What's wanted?"
+Then I rushed to the neighboring stable, and got up the sleepy hostler
+with as much vehemence in my manner as if he were in danger of being
+burned to death, and induced him to harness a team, in what I
+considered about twice the necessary length of time; drove three miles
+in the morning twilight for Mrs. Sweet, a motherly old maid in the
+nursing business, who had officiated at Bessie's own _dbut_ upon the
+stage of life. When I had got back and returned the team to the stable,
+and was walking about the lower rooms in a restless manner, feeling as
+if I had suddenly become a hopeless outcast, the doctor came down
+stairs, and said, with amazing calmness, as though it was the most
+commonplace thing in the world,--
+
+"Getting on nicely. Fine boy, sir! Mrs. Travers is quite comfortable.
+Will look in again in the course of the morning."
+
+Then I was left alone again, an outcast and a wanderer in my own home.
+All the life was up stairs, including the wee bit of new life that had
+come to venture upon the perils and vicissitudes of the great world. It
+was two hours, but it seemed a month, before any one relieved my
+solitude, and then it was at Bessie's interposition--in fact, a command
+that she had to insist upon until her mother was afraid of her getting
+excited--that I was admitted to behold the mysteries above.
+
+Well, it is nobody's business about the particulars of that chamber. It
+was too sacred for description; but there was the tiny, quivering, red
+new-comer, already dressed in some of the dainty liliputian garments,
+and very much astonished and not altogether pleased at the effect.
+Bessie was proud and happy, the nurse, moving about silently, knew just
+what to do and how to do it, and the mother-in-law held supreme command.
+She was grand and severe, and evidently her wishes had been disregarded
+in respect to the sex of her grandchild. She feared the consequences of
+another Charlie launched into a world already too degenerate, and she
+had hoped for an addition to the superior sex. But Bessie and I were
+mightily pleased that it was a boy.
+
+There was little to be said then, but in a few days the restraint began
+to be relaxed, and discussions arose about what had become the most
+important member of the household. Even the widow must be content with
+the second place now, but I began to have misgivings lest my position
+had been permanently fixed as the third. In my secret mind, however, I
+determined to assert my rights as soon as Bessie was strong again, and
+reduce my mother-in-law to the position in which she belonged. I had put
+off doing it too long, and advantage might be taken of the present
+juncture of affairs to strengthen her claim to supremacy, and it really
+wouldn't do to delay much longer.
+
+"I think he looks just like Charlie," said Bessie to Miss Van, the first
+time the latter called after the great event.
+
+"Well, I don't know," was the reply. "It seems to me he has his papa's
+dark eyes, but I can't see any other resemblance."
+
+"Oh, I do!" Bessie replied with spirit. "Why, it is just his forehead
+and mouth, and his hair will be just the same beautiful brown when he
+grows up."
+
+The old lady was looking on reproachfully, and finally said, "Bessie, my
+dear, that child looks precisely like your own family. George at his age
+was just such an infant; you couldn't tell them apart."
+
+George entered the room at that moment, and with his boisterous laugh
+said, "You don't mean to say that I was ever such a little, soft,
+ridiculous lump of humanity as that, do you?"
+
+"As like as two peas," was the reply of his mother.
+
+For my part I kept out of the discussion, for I must confess I could see
+no resemblance between the precious baby and any other mortal creature,
+except another baby of the same age. I thought they looked pretty much
+all alike, and was not prepared to deny that it was the exact
+counterpart of anybody at that particular stage of development.
+
+"I tell you what, Bess," said George, after the debate had fully
+subsided, "you must name that little chap for me."
+
+"Oh, no," replied the proud mother, "that is all settled; his name is
+Charlie."
+
+Nothing had been said on the subject before, and I was a little startled
+at Bessie's positive manner, for I thought even this matter would not be
+free from her mother's dictation. The old lady seemed surprised and
+vexed. "George is a much better name, I think," she said very quietly,
+keeping down her vexation, "but I thought perhaps you might remember
+your dear father in this matter. His name, you know, was Benjamin."
+
+"Yes, I know," said Bessie, very firmly, "but I think there is one with
+a still higher claim, and the child's name is Charles."
+
+"Good for you, little girl!" I thought, but I said nothing. Within me I
+felt a gleeful satisfaction at Bessie's spirit, which showed that if it
+ever came to a sharp contest with her mother, nothing could keep her
+from holding her own place by her husband's side. All my misgivings
+about her possible estrangement by her mother's influence vanished, and
+I saw that the new tie between us would be stronger than any earthly
+power.
+
+"Well," said George abruptly, after a pause, "I wouldn't be so
+disobliging about a little thing like that."
+
+"Ah! you wait until you can afford the opportunity of furnishing names,
+and see what you will do," I said jokingly. My joke was not generally
+appreciated. The widow gave me a look a little short of savage. Bessie
+suppressed a smile, in order to give me a reproof with her eyes, and
+Miss Van just then thought of something wholly irrelevant to say, as if
+she had not noticed my remark at all. On the whole, I was made to feel
+that it was a disgraceful failure.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX.
+
+THE SHADOW ON OUR LIFE.
+
+
+Another summer with all its glory was upon us. It was nearly a year
+since we were married, and I was beginning to feel the dignity of a
+family man. As Bessie regained her strength and bloom, she seemed to
+have a matronly grace and self-command quite new to her. As I looked
+back over our married life I saw no dark shadows, no coldness between us
+two, no misunderstandings that need occasion regret, but somehow it
+seemed as though that year had not been so bright and happy as it ought
+to have been. We had lived under an irksome restraint that was
+depressing. I had felt it more than Bessie, for she had been accustomed
+to submit to her mother, and did not chafe, but she plainly saw that my
+life had not that blithesomeness that would have been natural to me, and
+which she would have been glad to give it.
+
+It was the presence and influence of the mother-in-law that gave a
+chill to my home life, and yet I could accuse the good woman of no
+special offence. She was no vulgar meddler, and never wished or intended
+to mar our domestic felicity. She had managed to keep control of our
+household arrangements and we had passively acquiesced, but I felt that
+it would be better if Bessie would take command and cater more to our
+own desires. We could then have things our own way, and her position
+would be more becoming as the lady of the house. She began to regard it
+in the same light herself. Our social life, too, had been restrained and
+restricted. I was very fond of having my friends about me, and wished
+them to come in for the evening or to dinner or to pass a Sunday
+afternoon in our little bower, as often as they could find it agreeable.
+Mrs. Pinkerton made no open objections, but I knew the company of my
+friends was not congenial to her, and so was reluctant and backward in
+my invitations to them. Besides, they were apt to be chilled and
+disconcerted by the widow's stately presence and rebuking ways, and were
+disinclined to make themselves quite at home with us. Fred Marston and
+his wife had been quite driven away. Mrs. Pinkerton had declined to
+speak to the latter, and had told the former in plain terms that he used
+language of which no gentleman would be guilty.
+
+"By thunder!" roared the impulsive fellow, "I'll have you to understand
+that my wife and I are just as good as you, with your cursed airs of
+superiority!" and he stormed out of doors, and incontinently returned to
+town. When I met him afterwards he condescendingly declared that he
+didn't blame me, except that I ought to be a man and not allow "old
+Pink" to insult my guests. I did not particularly regret his
+discontinuing his visits, for, to tell the truth, I did not like his
+manners, and he had drifted into a circle and among associates not at
+all to my taste, but it galled me to have any one whom I chose to
+entertain driven out of my house.
+
+I think nothing saved our charming friend, Miss Van Duzen, to whom we
+had both become greatly attached, from being gracefully snubbed and
+insulted, except the presence of her uncle, whenever she came out to
+visit us in the evening. Mr. Desmond's indisputable social rank, his
+unimpeachable demeanor as a gentleman, and the dignity and
+impressiveness of his presence, though it could by no means overawe my
+mother-in-law, made it impossible even for her to give him an affront.
+Besides, she seemed to have a real respect for that fine old gentleman.
+She would doubtless have thought better of him if he had been a regular
+attendant at St. Thomas's Church, but she could not learn that he was
+very constant at any sanctuary. His views were decidedly what are called
+liberal, and yet he was very considerate of the religious beliefs and
+practices of others, and would cheerfully acknowledge the worthy aims
+and good works of all the different Christian denominations. He seemed
+to understand why other persons should choose to join one or another,
+while he preferred to stand aloof, have his own ways of thinking, and do
+whatever good he might in his own way. He had large business interests
+and great wealth, and though he maintained his mansion in the city in
+great elegance, his family expenses were comparatively small, and he was
+reputed to make it up fully by supporting more than one poor family in
+a quiet way. He was liberal in his conduct as well as his belief, and
+his character and habits were above the reproach of the severest critic.
+Hence it was that the widow was forced to respect at least this one of
+our visitors, and to treat his niece with common civility, though
+cordiality was out of the question.
+
+In fact, we owed to Mr. Desmond not a little for what relief we obtained
+in our social life from the chilling restraints of the mother-in-law's
+presence. He seemed to take a real pleasure in coming out to our little
+snuggery. His stately establishment in town could not be very home-like.
+His niece presided over it with great skill, and saw that every wish or
+taste of his was gratified. She could always entertain him with her
+sprightly wit, and their social occasions were among the most elegant in
+the city. He had his club to go to, which furnished every means that
+ingenuity and lavish resources could contrive to minister to the
+pleasures of man. And yet, there was wanting to his life that element
+that was the essence of home. He had longed for it when he was young,
+and had provided for it in his household; but the wife of his youth had
+been called from him early, and he had vainly tried to fill all his life
+with business, with silent works of charity, with elegance and profusion
+in his house, with his clubs, his studies, and his travels; but still
+there was a void, and when he came to visit us, he seemed to find
+something akin to the home feeling in our little circle. So he came far
+oftener than was to be expected of one in his position. Clara was his
+excuse, but it was plain to see that he liked to come on his own
+account, and he made himself very agreeable to us all; and when he came,
+we noticed the chilling influence of Mrs. Pinkerton much less than when
+he was not there.
+
+Sometimes we had a whist party. It was generally Bessie and I against
+Clara and George, but the widow had no objection to whist and was
+occasionally induced to take a hand, while Mr. Desmond was quite fond of
+the game and was a consummate player. When we young people made up the
+set, Mr. Desmond would converse with the widow, for though reticent
+where politeness did not call upon him to talk, he was incapable of the
+rudeness of sitting silent with one other person, or in a small party
+of intimate friends; and these conversations, showing his wide
+information on all manner of subjects, his sympathy with all charitable
+movements, and his tolerant regard even for the widow's pet ideas on
+church and society, evidently increased her respect for him.
+
+George must not be forgotten as a member of our circle, and never can be
+by those who were in it. His vivacity did much to relieve us from the
+depression that brooded over us. He and Clara Van, as he had taken to
+calling her as a sort of play upon caravan,--for was she not a whole
+team in herself? he would say,--he and Clara had many a lively contest
+of words, and were well matched in their powers of wit and repartee.
+
+Thus there were lights as well as shades, relief as well as depression,
+in our social life, but over it all was a shadow, the shadow of my
+mother-in-law.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X.
+
+MY MOTHER-IN-LAW SUBDUED.
+
+
+As I was saying, I made up my mind that our happiness was marred by
+habitual submission to mother-in-law, and I determined to shake off the
+nightmare, to assert myself, and to reduce that stately crown of gray
+puffs to a subordinate place. How was I to do it? There was nothing that
+I could make the cause of direct complaint, and it was hard to get into
+a downright conflict which would involve plain speaking. I consulted
+with Bessie, and she agreed with me, and promised to assume the
+direction of household affairs. She did not like to hurt her mother's
+feelings, but she admitted that it was best for her to be mistress. I
+could but admire the matronly firmness and tact with which she played
+her part. She gave her orders and told her mother what she proposed to
+do, and then proceeded to execute it as if there was no room for
+question. If opposition was made, she very quietly and firmly insisted.
+Her mother was astonished and had some warm words, in which she accused
+me of trying to set her daughter against her.
+
+"Oh, no," said Bessie, "Charlie does not wish to set me against you or
+to have you made unhappy, but he thinks it better that I should be the
+mistress here, and I quite agree with him, and propose henceforth to be
+the mistress."
+
+The widow was not offended, but hurt. She had too much good sense not to
+see the propriety of our decision, and she surrendered and tried not to
+appear affected.
+
+This was the first victory. Another time, at the table, she had
+exercised her prescriptive right of extinguishing me for some remark of
+which she did not approve. I fired up and remarked, "I have the right to
+speak my own opinion in my own house, Mrs. Pinkerton."
+
+"Certainly you have a right to speak your own opinion in your own
+house," she replied, with the least little sarcastic emphasis on "your
+own house," which cut me to the quick.
+
+"But you don't seem to think so," I said. "You have had a way of
+snubbing me and putting me down which I don't propose to tolerate any
+longer. I am master of my own conduct and of my own household, and I
+hope, in future, that my liberty may not be interfered with."
+
+The widow's lip quivered, her great eyes moistened, and she left the
+table, not because she was offended, but to hide her injured feelings. I
+felt mean, and would have apologized, but that I felt that my cause was
+at stake. There was no after-explanation. My mother-in-law came and went
+about the house as usual, calm and polite. A silly woman would have
+refused to speak to me for some weeks; but she was not a silly woman,
+and took pains to speak with the most studied politeness, and to avoid
+offence. Here, too, she had evidently surrendered.
+
+This was victory number two. One more and the battle was won. It was a
+Sunday in June. I had especially invited Mr. Desmond and his niece to
+come out to dinner and to spend the afternoon, and had insisted to Fred
+Marston that he should come with his wife. I wanted to vindicate my
+right to have what friends I pleased, and then I didn't care overmuch if
+I never saw him again. Mrs. Pinkerton had gone to church alone as usual.
+For some weeks Bessie had been unable to accompany her, and I preferred
+the sanctuary at which the scholarly, but heterodox, Mr. Freeman
+preached. When she returned, our guests had arrived. She put on her
+eye-glasses as she entered the gate, and looked about with evident
+disapproval, as we were scattered over the lawn. She did not believe in
+Sunday visits. She was even stiff and distant to Mr. Desmond, and
+refused to see the Marstons at all, though they were directly before her
+eyes. She walked straight into the house.
+
+"By Jove," said George to me in an undertone, "that isn't right! I shall
+speak to mother about cutting your guests in that way."
+
+"Never mind," I replied, "don't you say a word; I want an opportunity."
+
+He saw it in a minute, and acquiesced with a queer smile. He fully
+sympathized with me, and had even encouraged me in the work of
+emancipation. He had the utmost respect and affection for his mother,
+but he said it was not right for her to make my home unpleasant.
+
+That Sunday Mrs. Pinkerton joined us at the dinner-table. I knew she
+would not be guilty of the incivility of staying away.
+
+"You remember my friends, Mr. and Mrs. Marston?" I said, by way of
+introduction, as she came in.
+
+"I remember them very well," was the reply; "too well," the tone
+implied. I made a special effort to be talkative, and to keep others
+talking during the dinner. It was very hard work, and I met with
+indifferent success. It was not a pleasant dinner. Mr. Desmond alone
+appeared not to mind the restraint, and he alone ventured to address the
+widow. She was polite, but far from sociable. We contrived to pass the
+afternoon tolerably, but not at all in the spirit which I wished to have
+prevail when I had friends to visit me, and all because of that
+presence.
+
+After they were gone, I took occasion to introduce the subject, for I
+had learned that Mrs. Pinkerton's skill in expressing her disapproval in
+her manner was so great that she relied on it almost altogether, and
+rarely resorted to words for the purpose.
+
+"I am afraid you did not enjoy the company very much to-day," I said, as
+we were sitting in the little parlor, overlooking an exquisite flower
+garden.
+
+"No, sir," she answered, with the old emphasis on the "sir." "I do not
+approve of company on the Sabbath, and I had hoped you would never again
+bring those Marstons into my presence at any time."
+
+"Excuse me, madam; but I propose to be my own judge of whom I shall
+invite to visit me, and of the time and occasion. I presume you admit my
+right to do so."
+
+"Certainly, sir. I never disputed it, and had no intention of saying
+anything if you had not introduced the subject."
+
+"I introduced the subject for the very purpose; in fact, I brought out
+the company for the very purpose of vindicating my right, and it would
+be very gratifying to me if you would concede it cheerfully, and not, by
+your manner and way of treating my friends, interfere with it
+hereafter."
+
+I was almost astonished at my own courage and spirit, and still more so
+at Mrs. Pinkerton's reply. It was dusky and I could not see her face,
+but her voice trembled and choked as she answered,--
+
+"God knows I do not wish to interfere with your happiness. Bessie's
+happiness has been my one thought for years, and now it is bound up with
+yours. I have my own notions, which I cannot easily discard, but I would
+not do or say anything that would mar your enjoyment for the world. I
+have long felt that I did do so, and have made up my mind to make any
+sacrifice of pride and inclination to avoid it."
+
+Here she actually broke down and sobbed, and I was very near joining
+her. "Never mind," I said at length, quite softened; "I guess we shall
+get along pleasantly together in the future, now that we have an
+understanding."
+
+"I hope so," she said, recovering her serenity, and we relapsed into a
+painful silence.
+
+This was the third and final victory, but I felt no elation over it. My
+mother-in-law receded somewhat into the background, but it was so much
+in sorrow, rather than anger, that I felt her new mood almost as
+depressing as the old. I didn't want her to feel injured or subdued, but
+evidently she couldn't help it, and the mother-in-law, though conquered,
+was herself still, and that congeniality that would make our life
+together wholly pleasant was impossible. Her existence was still a
+shadow, less chilling and more pensive, but a shadow in our home, and it
+seemed destined to stay there.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI.
+
+GEORGE'S NEW DEPARTURE.
+
+
+"George is growing very restless. I don't know what ails him," Bessie
+said to me.
+
+"I can guess," I said, looking wise.
+
+"What is it?"
+
+"Do you remember what an uneasy, good-for-nothing chap one Charlie
+Travers was, when he first began to call on a certain young woman with
+conspicuous regularity?"
+
+"O Charlie, you don't think he--"
+
+"No, no! Now don't explode too suddenly. I wouldn't have him know that I
+suspect anything for the world. We won't name any names, but I keep my
+eyes about me, and I flatter myself I know the symptoms."
+
+And with these mysterious words, I started for the bank, leaving to
+Bessie a new and delightful subject for speculation and air-castle
+building.
+
+George did not come home to supper that day, but that was nothing
+extraordinary. I was sitting out on the porch, smoking after the meal,
+and saw him coming up the street.
+
+"Where have you been?" I asked, as he joined me and took a seat.
+
+"None of your business. In town."
+
+"Is Miss Van well?" I asked mischievously.
+
+"How should I know?"
+
+"Come, George, you don't play the part of Innocence over well. Suppose
+you try Candor, and tell me where you have been."
+
+"You mistake my identity. I'm not your baby. You will find the youthful
+Charlie entertaining his mother up stairs."
+
+A long-drawn-out, agonized wail, proceeding from the regions above,
+showed how Bessie was being entertained.
+
+"No opening yet?" I ventured to ask, changing the subject.
+
+"Not the slightest prospect. If some of these doctors could only be
+inveigled into taking some of their own prescriptions! But no; they are
+too wise."
+
+"The bitterness of your tone would seem to indicate that you have not
+enjoyed your visit to the town."
+
+"The town be hanged, and the country too! Let's take a walk down the
+street. Give me a cigar, confound you! How hot it is!"
+
+We strolled down the street.
+
+"This is a terrible vale of tears, this world," said I. "The world is
+hollow, and my doll is stuffed with sawdust, which accounts for his
+howling."
+
+George was silent. He pulled at his cigar ferociously, smoked it half
+up, threw it away, and replaced it by a cigarette.
+
+"When a man throws away the best part of a Reina Victoria he is either
+flush or badly in love," said I to myself. I waited patiently for him to
+speak, as I was perfectly willing to receive his confidence, but I
+didn't have the chance. He maintained a loud silence all the way, and we
+walked back home as we had gone out.
+
+"Something's up--something serious," I informed Bessie that night, "but
+George does not confide in me worth a cent, which I think is a little
+unbrotherly."
+
+The following day George was absent from an early hour in the afternoon
+till long after all the household were fast asleep at night. I was
+awakened at about midnight by a light tapping at the door of our room,
+and slipped out of bed without disturbing Bessie or the baby.
+
+"Come up to my den!" whispered George, as I opened the door. "Don't wake
+the others."
+
+I quietly got into my clothes and crawled noiselessly up to George's
+"den," devoured by curiosity. The moment I caught sight of his handsome
+face I saw that it was all right with him, and that he had nothing but
+good news to tell me. We sat down, hoisted our heels to a comfortable
+altitude, and George told his story. I let him tell it himself here:--
+
+"I was feeling terribly blue yesterday, when you saw me," he began, "as
+you could see. In the afternoon I went into town, and, according to a
+previous arrangement, hired a horse and buggy and called to take her out
+riding."
+
+(Of course "her" was Miss Van.)
+
+"We had agreed to take the old Linwood road, and follow it to the
+village, returning through the Maplewood Park and so getting back to the
+city at about six. We left the town and passed through the suburbs
+rapidly, until we struck into the country, and there I let the horse go
+his own pace, which was slow. So much the better. Miss Van Duzen was
+never more charming. We had the most agreeable bit of talk, and she drew
+me out till I amazed myself. She always does. It's no use my telling
+you, Charlie, but I have been a fool in my love for her ever since the
+night she came into this cottage like a stray beam of sunshine on a
+cloudy day. My heart went out of my keeping the night she called here
+with the old gentleman. I believe it was her freshness, her moral
+purity, that acted on my morbid, half _blas_ spirit, like a tonic, and
+brought me on my feet. I'm talking random nonsense, you say, but why
+shouldn't I? I'm drunk with love. Don't laugh at me. I'll be all right
+by daylight, except a headache. We got to talking about ourselves.
+Lovers always do, don't they? You ought to know. There doesn't seem to
+be much else in the world worth talking about. I told her all about
+myself,--my past, with its good and bad points, and my present hopes and
+purposes. It all popped out as naturally as possible. I suppose it would
+sound like drivel if I were to repeat it. Finally she began to laugh.
+
+"'It is dangerous to make a woman your confidant,' she said. 'How do you
+know that I can keep a secret better than any other of my sex?'
+
+"'I am not afraid on that score,' said I. 'This is my confessional. It
+is as sacred as any. Am I to receive absolution?'
+
+"She could not fully promise that. She read me a neat little lecture. It
+was fascinating to thus receive correction at her hands. I pledged
+myself, when it was done, to follow the course laid out for me. Then I
+made bold to exchange _rles_. With some maidenly hesitation, which soon
+vanished, she in turn laid before me the inner history of her life. Ah,
+my boy, how little there was in it to gloss over! how much to humiliate
+the best and noblest of us men! It was a revelation that made me
+prostrate myself before her. I was not worthy to hear it."
+
+George paused, and drummed on the table with his fingers nervously.
+
+"I may as well tell you all," he resumed. "I had resolved to ask that
+girl to marry me when we started on our ride, but after what she said to
+me so simply and modestly, I positively could not do it. She expected me
+to speak, I know that, for she would not have told me what she did tell
+me, otherwise."
+
+"So you didn't speak? Oh, stupid, stupid boy!"
+
+"I know it. But my tongue was tied. Perhaps it was all cowardice; I
+can't say. I never was afraid of any one before. I came home utterly
+shattered and down-hearted. To-day I gravitated back to her, after a
+sleepless night. She received me with the same friendly smile as usual,
+but there seemed to be a slight shadow over her spirits. That little,
+almost imperceptible change filled me with joy. I jumped to a conclusion
+that intoxicated me, and made the plunge at once.
+
+"'It is another case of the moth and the candle,' I said to her.
+
+"'Thank you. So I am a candle? That is a fine figure of speech.'
+
+"'Seriously speaking, I think we had not finished what we were talking
+of yesterday.'
+
+"'What were we talking of yesterday?' she had the effrontery to ask.
+'Oh, yes, now I recollect. It was yourself. That subject, I fear, you
+will never finish talking of.'
+
+"'Now that's a very mean speech, all things considered,' I whined. 'Do
+you want to strike a man, when he's way down?'
+
+"'Don't play Uriah Heep. I hate 'umble people. But if I have perchance
+pierced the thick epidermis of Parisian pride you have so long worn, I'm
+glad of it.'
+
+"She likes to abuse me, and I enjoy it quite as well as she. She
+continued to scold me and mock me for some time, to disguise her actual
+mood. I saw through it, and let her have her way for a while. The meeker
+my replies, the greater the exaggerated harshness of her criticisms. At
+last I no longer attempted to reply at all. Leaning back in a corner of
+the sofa, I watched the play of her animated features and the light of
+her dark brown eyes, and felt that she was the one woman in the
+universe that suited me, the one woman I could respect and love
+passionately at the same time.
+
+"'You say truly I am a coward. I am aware of that. I admit that I am all
+that is detestable. If such a wretch as you describe were to love a
+woman, what unhappiness for him! There could be no hope for him. He
+would know his own irredeemable unworthiness, and so could only slink
+away in shame.'
+
+"'You are quite right,' she cried, laughing merrily. 'That would be the
+only course for him to pursue.'
+
+"'By the way,' I said, 'that reminds me that my train goes out in twenty
+minutes.'
+
+"I rose, and she also stood up to accompany me to the door. I held out
+my hand. It was an unusual demonstration, and perhaps she thought it
+meant good-by in earnest. At least, as she put her hand in mine, I
+detected a look I had never before seen in the depths of those fine
+eyes. With a sudden, unpremeditated, and irresistible movement, I drew
+her close to me, folded my arms about her, and kissed her passionately.
+
+"'Clara!' I whispered, 'I love you! I love you! Don't tell me to go.'
+
+"She gently drew herself out of my reluctant arms, and though her eyes
+were misty now, I saw in them that I was to stay.
+
+"That's all the story I have to tell you, Charlie. I am too happy
+to-night to sleep, so I couldn't let you sleep. I stayed and spent the
+evening. Mr. Desmond, bless his dear old heart! cried over Clara, and
+gave her an old-fashioned blessing. I walked home on air. Do I look very
+badly corned?"
+
+I gave him a rousing hand-shake, and wiped away a stray bit of moisture
+from my cheek.
+
+"May I tell Bessie?" were my first words when I found my tongue.
+
+"Why not? There will be no long engagement in this case. The knot shall
+be tied as soon as possible."
+
+The announcement I made to my little wife the following morning was not
+entirely unexpected, yet it filled her with delight. Miss Van was the
+woman of all others that Bessie wished to have George marry. The
+arrangement was, therefore, completely to her satisfaction, and she
+beamed upon the happy George with true sisterly affection.
+
+What effect would the news have upon Mrs. Pinkerton? I asked myself. I
+had not long to wait for an answer, for it was at the breakfast-table
+that George fired the shot.
+
+"Mother," said the bold youth, "I'm going to be married."
+
+His mother abruptly stopped stirring her coffee, and her spine visibly
+stiffened, but she said nothing.
+
+"The event will occur without delay. Of course it is useless to inform
+you who is the--"
+
+"Quite useless," Mrs. Pinkerton broke in; "my wishes in the matter are
+not of the slightest consequence to you."
+
+"On the contrary. Now, look here; don't be so infernally quick to
+anticipate my wilfulness. I want to conform to your wishes if I can.
+_Que faire?_"
+
+"We will talk about it after breakfast."
+
+Accordingly, there was a serious passage-at-arms in the library after
+breakfast. George left the house a conqueror, but the conquered had no
+sort of intention of abandoning the campaign after a Bull Run defeat. In
+fact, war had only just been declared. It must not be supposed that it
+was a war the movements of which could be followed by the acutest
+military observer; the batteries were all masked, but the gunpowder was
+there. I felt confident that George would carry everything before him,
+and he did. He brought Miss Van over to spend the evening, and we had
+the pleasantest time imaginable. He would not allow his mother to say a
+word against Miss Van, and made a fair show of proving that the latter
+had, not only better blood, but also better breeding and a truer sense
+of propriety than my mother-in-law, that is, "when it came to the
+scratch," as George said. "But who would give a snap for a young woman
+who can't throw aside the shackles of conventionality once in a while,
+and be herself?"
+
+Miss Van was her own jolliest, sweetest self at this time. Her beauty
+had never been so noticeable: joy is an excellent cosmetic, and love
+paints far better than rouge or powder.
+
+As soon as Mrs. Pinkerton had recovered from her defeat, and when the
+engagement had become an acknowledged fact which all the world might
+know, the wedding began to loom up before us, and I could not help
+wondering if St. Thomas's Church was to be the scene of as fashionable
+and grand a display as on the occasion when Bessie and myself were made
+one.
+
+I felt reasonably certain that Mrs. Pinkerton would make an effort to
+that end, and I was curious to see how George would look on it.
+
+Bessie, I think, would have been glad to see the marriage take place
+with as much pomp and show as possible. She was intensely interested in
+what Clara should wear, and every visit from that young woman was the
+occasion for a vast deal of confidential and no doubt highly important
+_tte--tte_ consultation.
+
+Mother-in-law sailed into the library one evening with unusual celerity
+of movement.
+
+"George, dear," she said, "this cannot be true! You would not permit
+such an eccentric, uncivilized proceeding. Surely you will not offend
+our friends by--"
+
+"Avast there! Our friends be hanged!" cried George wickedly. "Yes, it's
+true, too true. The ceremony will be private, and no cards. You can
+come, though! Next Wednesday, at two o'clock, sharp!"
+
+This was cruel. I could see his mother almost stagger under the blow.
+She attempted to remonstrate, but it was too late. George assured her
+that "it was all fixed," and that Clara had agreed with him regarding
+the details.
+
+"Honest old John Stephens will tie the knot," said he, "and it will be
+just as tight as if Dr. McCanon manipulated the holy bonds. I trust we
+shall have the pleasure of your company, mother. Consider yourself
+invited. A few of the choicest spirits will be on hand. Clara will wear
+the most exquisite gray travelling suit you ever laid eyes on."
+
+The widow was flanked, outgeneralled, routed along the whole line. She
+brought forward all her reserve forces of good-breeding, and thus
+escaped a disastrous panic by retiring in good order.
+
+The ceremony occurred, as George had announced, the following
+Wednesday. The near relatives and best friends of the young couple were
+present, and it was a quiet and thoroughly enjoyable affair for all who
+participated. An hour after they had been pronounced man and wife,
+George and his bride rode away to take the train for the mountains.
+
+ "And on her lover's arm she leant,
+ And round her waist she felt it fold,
+ And far across the hills they went
+ In that new world which is the old."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII.
+
+BABY TALK, OLD DIVES, AND OTHER THINGS.
+
+
+The cottage seemed dull enough after the departure of George with his
+bride. Bessie was so absorbed by the care of our little one that she had
+very little time to think of anything else, and in fact the new-comer,
+for the time being, monopolized the attention of his grandmother as well
+as of his mother. I was therefore left to my own resources.
+
+"Baby is not very well, Charlie," Bessie informed me, one morning, with
+an anxious air. "Do you think it would do to wrap him up well and take
+him for a little ride this afternoon?"
+
+"Yes, that's a good idea. If I can get that black horse at the livery
+stable, I'll bring him around this afternoon. But I don't see why you
+should wrap him up. It's hot as blazes."
+
+"You don't know anything about babies, Charlie. Go along. Get a nice,
+easy carriage, and we'll take mother with us. I long for a ride."
+
+I departed, and secured the desired "team."
+
+Towards two o'clock I drove up to the cottage, and the entire family
+bundled into the vehicle, and we were off. I chose a pleasant, shady
+road, and drove slowly, while Bessie and her mother filled the air with
+baby talk.
+
+As we were climbing the hill near Linwood, I saw, a short distance ahead
+of us, the form of an elderly gentleman toiling up the ascent in the
+sun. He seemed fatigued, and stopped as we drew near him, to wipe the
+beads of perspiration from his brow.
+
+"Why, it's Mr. Desmond!" exclaimed Bessie.
+
+Sure enough! As he turned toward us I recognized the white vest, the
+expansive shirt-front, and the resplendent watch-chain that could belong
+to no other than "old Dives" himself.
+
+"How d'ye do?" I cried, halting our fiery steed.
+
+"Ah! Mr. Travers, Mrs. Pinkerton, how do you do? Delighted to meet you.
+It's very warm."
+
+"How came you so far out in the country afoot?" I asked.
+
+"I had some business at Melton, and lost the 2:30 train back to town,
+so I started to walk to Linwood with the purpose of taking a train on
+the other road. They told me it was only a mile and a half, but--." And
+he sighed significantly.
+
+"How fortunate that we met you," said Mrs. Pinkerton quickly, taking the
+words out of my mouth. "Get in and ride to Linwood with us. We have a
+vacant seat, you see."
+
+I seconded her invitation, and without much hesitation he accepted, and
+took a seat by my side. The conversation turned naturally upon the
+"young couple" (Bessie and I were no longer referred to in that way),
+and Mr. Desmond extolled his niece unreservedly. Mother-in-law was
+evidently somewhat impressed, but I think she made some mental
+reservations.
+
+"Will you smoke, Mr. Desmond?" I asked, offering him a cigar.
+
+"No, I thank you."
+
+"Oh, I had forgotten you did not approve of the habit. Excuse me."
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton explained to Mr. Desmond, apologetically, that I was an
+irresponsible victim of the nicotine poison. I laughed, but Mr. Desmond
+received the explanation solemnly, and expressed his abhorrence for "the
+weed."
+
+The old gentleman professed great admiration for baby, and said that he
+looked exactly like his mother; in fact, the resemblance was almost
+startling.
+
+By the time we had got to Linwood, our passenger had talked himself into
+a state of good-humor, and we left him at the railroad station, bowing
+and smiling with true old-school _aplomb_.
+
+Bessie thought the ride did Charlie, junior, good, and so it became a
+regular thing, on pleasant afternoons, to take him out for a little
+airing. Mrs. Pinkerton overcame her scruples, and usually accompanied
+us. A sample of the sweet converse held with my son and heir on the back
+seat will suffice:--
+
+"Sodywazzaleetlecatchykums! 'Esoodavaboobangy! Mamma's cunnin'
+kitten-baby!"
+
+One day, just before noon, when I had been making a mental calculation
+as to how I should be able to cover the livery-stable bill, a fine
+equipage stopped in front of the bank, and through the window I saw the
+stately driver hand a note to our errand-boy. In a moment Tommy appeared
+in the room and handed me the billet, which ran thus:--
+
+ MY DEAR MR. TRAVERS,--I trust you will not take it amiss if I
+ send my coachman out your way once in a while to exercise the
+ ponies. Since Clara's taking-off, they have stood still too
+ much, and knowing that you go to ride occasionally with your
+ family, I take the liberty of putting them at your disposal for
+ the present, with instructions to John, who is a careful and
+ trustworthy driver, to place himself at your service whenever
+ you are so disposed. The obligation will be entirely on my part,
+ if you will kindly take a turn behind the ponies whenever you
+ choose. My regards to your wife and Mrs. Pinkerton.
+
+ Believe me yours sincerely,
+
+ T. G. DESMOND.
+
+
+I could find no objection to accepting this kindly offer, so delicately
+made, but I did not dare to do so before consulting Bessie and her
+mother, so I stepped into the carriage and had John drive me to the
+cottage. There was a consultation, and after I had overcome some feeble
+scruples on Mrs. Pinkerton's part, which I am afraid were hypocritical,
+we decided to take advantage of Mr. Desmond's generosity. I sent a note
+of thanks back by John, and thenceforth we took our rides behind "old
+Dives's" black ponies. Occasionally the old gentleman himself came out
+in the carriage, and proved himself as trustworthy and careful a driver
+as John, handling the "ribbons" with the air of an accomplished whip.
+The rides were very pleasant, those beautiful summer days, and the
+change from a hired "team" to the sumptuous establishment of Mr. Desmond
+was extremely grateful.
+
+Mr. Desmond was doubtless very lonely without his niece. She had been
+the light of his home, and her absence was probably felt by the old
+gentleman with more keenness than he had anticipated at the outset. His
+large and beautifully furnished mansion needed the presence of just such
+a person of vivacious and cheery character as Clara, to prevent it from
+becoming cheerless in its grandeur. He intimated as much, and appeared
+unusually restless and low-spirited for him. He sought to make up for
+the absence of the sunshine and joyousness that "Miss Van" had taken
+away with her, by applying himself with especial diligence to business;
+but he really had not much business to engross his attention, beyond
+collecting his interest and looking out for his agents, and it failed to
+fill the void. He betook himself to his club, and killed time
+assiduously, talking with the men-about-town he found there, playing
+whist, and running through the magazines and reviews in search of wit
+and wisdom wherewith to divert himself. The dull season had set in;
+there was little doing, in affairs, commerce, politics, or literature;
+and direct efforts at killing time always result in making time go more
+heavily than ever. Mr. Desmond's attempt was like a curious _pas seul_,
+executed by a nimble actor in a certain extravaganza, the peculiarity of
+which is that at every forward step the dancer slides farther and
+farther backward, until finally an unseen power appears to drag him back
+into the flies.
+
+It was during one of our afternoon drives, when Mr. Desmond usurped the
+office of his coachman, that he confided to us a plan which he had
+devised to cure his _ennui_.
+
+"I have made up my mind," he said, "to go abroad for a good long tour.
+It will be the best move I could possibly make."
+
+"I don't doubt it," I said. "How soon do you propose to go?" And Bessie
+sighed, "O dear, how delightful!"
+
+"My plans are not matured," Mr. Desmond continued, "but I think I shall
+sail early next month. My favorite steamer leaves on the 6th."
+
+"I hope you will enjoy a pleasant voyage, and a delightful trip on the
+other side," said Mrs. Pinkerton politely.
+
+Mr. Desmond returned thanks. Nothing more was said that day concerning
+his project. When he left us at the cottage, he remarked,--
+
+"By the way, Mr. Travers, I wish you would call at my office to-morrow
+morning at or about eleven o'clock, if you can make it convenient to do
+so."
+
+"I will do so," I replied, wondering what he could want of me.
+
+At the appointed hour the next day I was on hand at his office. He
+motioned to me to be seated and then said,--
+
+"Yesterday morning I met John K. Blunt, of Blunt Brothers & Company, at
+my club, and he told me that their cashier had defaulted. An account of
+the affair is in this morning's papers. They want a new cashier. I have
+mentioned your name, and if you will go around to their office with me,
+we will talk with Blunt."
+
+"Mr. Desmond--" I began, but he stopped me.
+
+"Don't let's have any talk but business," he said. "The figures will be
+satisfactory, I am confident."
+
+Satisfactory! They were munificent! Blunt liked me, and only a few short
+and sharp sentences from such a man as Desmond finished the business. I
+saw a future of opulence before me. My head was almost turned. I tried
+to thank Mr. Desmond, but he would not listen to my earnest expressions
+of gratitude.
+
+"I have engaged passage for the 6th," he told me when we were parting;
+"I will try to call at your cottage before I get off. I am busy settling
+up some details now. Good day."
+
+I hastened home with my good news. Bessie's eyes glistened when she
+heard it, and even my mother-in-law showed a faint sign of pleasure at
+my good luck.
+
+The following Saturday evening Mr. Desmond came out to see us.
+
+"Don't consider this my farewell appearance," he said. "I merely wished
+to tell you that my friends have inveigled me into giving an informal
+party Tuesday evening, at which I shall expect you all to appear."
+
+He talked glibly, for him, and gave us an outline sketch of his proposed
+tour. I thought he seemed strangely restless and nervous, and I pitied
+him.
+
+His "informal party" was really a noteworthy affair, and the wealth and
+respectability of the city were well represented. Bessie could not go,
+on account of the baby, so I acted as escort to Mrs. Pinkerton, who made
+herself amazingly agreeable. There were not many young people present,
+and the affair was quiet and genteel in the extreme. Bank presidents,
+capitalists, professional men, and "solid" men, with their wives,
+attired in black silks, formed the majority of the guests. They were Mr.
+Desmond's personal friends. My mother-in-law was in congenial company,
+and I believe she enjoyed the evening remarkably. Most of the
+conversation turned, very naturally, upon European travel. Americans who
+are possessed of wealth always have done "the grand tour," and they
+invariably speak of "Europe" in a general way, as if it were all one
+country.
+
+"When I returned from my first tour abroad, a friend said to me that he
+'supposed it was a fine country over there,'" said Mr. Desmond to me,
+laughing.
+
+Some one asked him where he had decided to go.
+
+"I shall land at Havre, and go straight to Paris," he answered. "I
+flatter myself I am a good American, and as I have been comparatively
+dead since my niece left me, I am entitled to a place in that
+terrestrial paradise."
+
+I thought I had never seen Mrs. Pinkerton appear to so good advantage as
+she did on this occasion. Her natural good manners and her intelligence
+made her attractive in such a company, and she was the centre of a
+bright group of middle-aged Brahmins throughout the entire evening. Mr.
+Desmond appeared grateful for the assistance she rendered in making his
+party pass off pleasantly, and as for me, I began to feel that I had
+never quite appreciated her best qualities. She was a woman that one
+could not wholly know in a year, perhaps not in a lifetime. "Who knows?"
+I thought; "perhaps I have wronged my mother-in-law."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII.
+
+A SURPRISE.
+
+
+We were feeling a little solemn at the cottage. George, with his lively
+ways, and Clara, with her sparkling vivacity, were away on their wedding
+tour, and our good friend, Mr. Desmond, to whom we had taken a great
+liking, was about to sail for an indefinite absence in foreign lands.
+Though the mother-in-law's presence was less oppressive than formerly,
+there was now a pensiveness, an air of departed glory about it, that was
+not cheerful. There was danger of settling down to a humdrum sort of
+life, free from strife, perhaps, but at the same time devoid of that
+buoyancy which should make the home of a young couple joyous.
+
+I was a little doubtful of making a vacation in the country this summer.
+To be sure, when George went away, it was agreed that after he had gone
+the round of the White Mountains, the attractions of Canada, Niagara
+Falls, and Saratoga, he would return for a quiet stay of a few weeks, at
+the close of the season, to the little resort which we had visited a
+year ago, and there, if Bessie's health would permit, and I could
+arrange for a sufficient absence from business, we would join them. But
+I almost dreaded taking Mrs. Pinkerton with us, and doubted whether she
+would go; at the same time, I did not like to propose leaving her behind
+to take care of the cottage. I was in perplexity, and, notwithstanding
+my splendid new prospects in business, was not feeling cheerful.
+
+Coming home from a restless round of the city on the Fourth of July,
+where I had found the great national holiday a bore, I noticed Mr.
+Desmond's team coming up to the garden gate with a brisk turn. That fine
+old gentleman--I always feel like calling him old on account of his gray
+whiskers, though he was little more than fifty--came down the walk and
+with stately politeness assisted Bessie and the baby out of the
+carriage. I looked to see Mrs. Pinkerton follow, but she was not there,
+and clearly Mr. Desmond had not been to ride. It struck me as a little
+queer, not to say amusing, that they had been having a quiet
+_tte--tte_ together in the cottage while John gave Bessie and the
+baby their airing. But then, it was not so strange either, for was he
+not going to leave us in two days? It was no uncommon thing for Mrs.
+Pinkerton to stay within while Bessie was out, and he had probably
+dropped in late in the afternoon, expecting to find us all at home, as
+it was a holiday. I bade him good by in case I did not see him again, as
+he got into the carriage to ride back to the city.
+
+"Oh, I shall see you to-morrow," he said in a brisk tone which had not
+been habitual with him of late.
+
+That evening my mother-in-law was uncommonly gracious, a little
+absent-minded, and more pleasant in spirit than I had ever known her.
+She seemed to be filled with an inward satisfaction that I could not
+make out at all. Bessie and I both remarked it, but could not surmise
+any cause for the apparent change that had come over the spirit of her
+dream.
+
+Next morning, on reaching town, I found a note asking me to step over
+to Mr. Desmond's office when I could find time. I went at my leisure,
+wondering what was up. As I entered, he seemed remarkably cordial and
+happy.
+
+"I find that Blunt," he said in a business-like way, "would like to have
+you take hold at once, if possible. Their affairs are in some confusion
+and need an experienced hand to straighten them out. It will be
+necessary for you to give a bond, which I have here all prepared, with
+satisfactory sureties, and you need only give us your signature, which I
+will have properly witnessed on the spot."
+
+"Oh, is that it?" I thought. Strange I didn't think of its having
+something to do with my new position. I knew I could get away from my
+old place at a week's notice, as I had already made known my intention
+to leave, and there were several applicants for the position. The bond
+was executed without hesitation.
+
+"You will not lose your vacation," Mr. Desmond said, "though your salary
+will begin at once. As soon as you can get matters in order, which may
+take a month or more, you are to be allowed a few weeks' absence to
+recuperate and get fully prepared for your new responsibilities."
+
+Thanking him for his kindness, I was about to go, when he said, "Sit
+down, Mr. Travers. I have something else to say to you."
+
+"What's coming now?" I wondered, as I took my seat again. Mr. Desmond
+seemed a little at a loss how to begin his new communication, and came
+nearer appearing embarrassed than I should have thought possible for
+him.
+
+"The fact is," he said at last, "I have changed my mind about going
+abroad."
+
+I have no doubt I looked very much surprised and puzzled, and smiling at
+the expression of my face, he went on,--
+
+"Your mother-in-law, Mrs. Pinkerton, is a very worthy woman; in fact, a
+remarkably worthy woman."
+
+I couldn't deny that; but why should he choose such a time and place to
+compliment her?
+
+"Do you know," he added, with a still nearer approach to embarrassment
+in his manner, and something like a blush on his usually calm face, "I
+have asked her to become Mrs. Desmond."
+
+"The devil you have!" was my thought as astonishment fairly overcame
+me. I didn't say it, though, but it was my turn to be embarrassed, and I
+hardly knew what to say.
+
+Having got it out, Mr. Desmond fairly recovered his equanimity. "Yes,"
+he said, "I put the idea away from me for a long time, but it would
+persist in growing upon me, and I finally concluded that perhaps it
+might contribute to the happiness of _all_ parties, so I have taken the
+plunge. I hope you approve of it," he added, with a queer twinkle in his
+eye.
+
+"With all my heart, sir," I said earnestly; "and I am sure it will be as
+pleasing as it is surprising to us all."
+
+Throughout that afternoon I was restless, and eager to get home to tell
+Bessie the wonderful news. It was the longest afternoon I ever saw, but
+at length it passed and I hurried home. As Bessie met me at the door I
+said eagerly, "I've got a surprise for you, deary."
+
+Now I noticed for the first time that she was all smiles and full of
+something that she was eager to surprise me with. Simultaneously each
+recognized that the other had the secret already. Of course; what a
+fool I was! Her mother naturally enough would tell her while Mr. Desmond
+broke the matter to me.
+
+"Isn't it jolly?" I said.
+
+"Why, Charlie, are you then so anxious to get rid of poor, dear mamma?"
+she said, half reproachfully and half teasingly.
+
+"Oh, no, of course not, but it is really nice for all of us, isn't it
+now? She won't be far off, you know; we shall have our little home all
+to ourselves, and Mr. Desmond will be a sort of guardian for us. And as
+I said before, I think it is jolly."
+
+"Well, I must confess I do not altogether like the idea of mamma
+marrying again, and I shall miss her very much, after all."
+
+I couldn't help laughing at the little woman's demure countenance, as
+she said this. There was a little trace of jealousy in her gentle
+heart--jealousy so natural to women--at the idea of another's taking her
+mother off, just as that good woman had been jealous at her taking off.
+I accused her of it, and she repudiated the idea.
+
+But everybody must admit that things had fallen out just right for all
+parties, and the shadow was to be taken from our household by a new
+burst of sunlight, without any heart-burning for anybody, and with
+nothing but satisfaction for all. It was arranged that the new marriage
+should presently occur, and the mature couple take a little trip, and
+surprise George and Clara by being at the Fairview Hotel before them.
+Their first knowledge of the turn of affairs was to come when they
+arrived there late in August, and found their new relations in
+possession. Bessie and I were to join the party for a brief stay, and so
+my perplexity was happily ended.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV.
+
+A HAPPY PROSPECT.
+
+
+The landscape is lovely in these latter days of August. The mountains
+are grand and solemn in their everlasting silence. We are together at
+the Fairview, and everybody feels free and happy. There is no restraint,
+and our future prospects are delightful. Before George left home in June
+he had made application for a vacant chair in the Medical College and
+presented his credentials and testimonials. He expected nothing from it,
+he said, but would leave me to look out and see what decision was made.
+I had brought with me the news of his appointment. I had also secured
+for him the refusal of an elegant house which had been suddenly vacated
+and offered for sale on account of the failure in business of its owner.
+It was very near our cottage, had lovely surroundings, was beautifully
+furnished, and was to be sold with all its contents. It has now been
+decided between George and Mr. Desmond that it shall be purchased at
+once, and shall become the legal possession of Clara, being paid for out
+of her ample fortune, now under her own control, but not yet taken from
+her uncle's keeping.
+
+Mr. and Mrs. Desmond will take possession of the city mansion, and I
+have no doubt that its state and elegance will be fully kept up. I see
+before me happy times for us all, and at last I think we understand and
+appreciate each other. Our relations being properly and happily
+adjusted, there will be no more "unpleasantness." And I must acknowledge
+that, in spite of past feelings and the little clouds that have flecked
+our sky, sometimes appearing dark and portentous, these happy results
+are due in no small measure to MY MOTHER-IN-LAW.
+
+
+THE END.
+
+
+
+
+Transcriber's Note: The table below lists all corrections applied to
+the original text.
+
+p. 039: a hand encased in a mit -> mitt
+p. 128: [added quotes] better than any other of my sex?'
+p. 131: [added quotes] slink away in shame.'
+p. 133: [added quotes] _Que faire?_"
+p. 145: And Besssie sighed -> Bessie
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of That Mother-in-Law of Mine, by Anonymous
+
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+
+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of That Mother-in-Law of Mine, by Anonymous
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: That Mother-in-Law of Mine
+
+Author: Anonymous
+
+Release Date: October 16, 2009 [EBook #30270]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THAT MOTHER-IN-LAW OF MINE ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Irma Spehar, Markus Brenner and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_1" id="Page_1">[1]</a></span></p>
+
+<h1><span class="smcap">That Mother-in-Law<br />
+<span class="smaller">of</span><br />
+mine.</span></h1>
+
+<p class="motto"><span class="smcap">&#8220;Be to her virtues very kind,<br />
+Be to her faults a little blind.&#8221;</span></p>
+
+<p class="publisher">PHILADELPHIA:<br />
+THE KEYSTONE PUBLISHING CO.<br />
+1889.</p>
+
+<p class="copyright"><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_2" id="Page_2">[2]</a></span>
+COPYRIGHT<br />
+<span class="smcap">By</span> JOHN E. POTTER AND COMPANY,<br />
+<span class="smaller">1879</span></p>
+
+<p class="dedication"><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_3" id="Page_3">[3]</a></span>
+Dedicated<br />
+<em class="gesperrt">TO ALL THOSE HAVING</em><br />
+MOTHERS-IN-LAW<br />
+<span class="smaller">OR EXPECTING TO HAVE.</span></p>
+
+<!-- <p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_4" id="Page_4">[4]</a></span>[Blank Page]</p> -->
+
+
+
+
+<p class="contents"><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_5" id="Page_5">[5]</a></span>CONTENTS.</p>
+
+
+<div class="center">
+<table class="toc" summary="Contents">
+<tr><th colspan="2">Chapter</th><th class="onpage">Page</th></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_I">I.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_I">Bessie and I and Bessie&#8217;s Mother</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_7">7</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_II">II.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_II">Courting the Mother</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_15">15</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_III">III.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_III">Our Marriage</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_28">28</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_IV">IV.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_IV">Mountains and more Mother-in-Law</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_37">37</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_V">V.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_V">The Rise and Fall</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_50">50</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_VI">VI.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_VI">What is Home without a Mother-in-Law?</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_71">71</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_VII">VII.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_VII">Miss Van&#8217;s Party and another Unpleasantness</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_84">84</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_VIII">VIII.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_VIII">Another Charlie in the Field</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_98">98</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_IX">IX.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_IX">The Shadow on our Life</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_108">108</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_X">X.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_X">My Mother-in-Law Subdued</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_115">115</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_XI">XI.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_XI">George&#8217;s New Departure</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_123">123</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_XII">XII.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_XII">Baby Talk, Old Dives, and Other Things</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_138">138</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_XIII">XIII.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_XIII">A Surprise</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_150">150</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td class="roman"><a href="#CHAPTER_XIV">XIV.</a></td><td class="caption"><a href="#CHAPTER_XIV">A Happy Prospect</a></td><td class="onpage"><a href="#Page_158">158</a></td></tr>
+</table></div>
+
+<!-- <p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_6" id="Page_6">[6]</a></span>[Blank Page]</p> -->
+
+
+
+<p class="maintitle"><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_7" id="Page_7">[7]</a></span>MY MOTHER-IN-LAW.</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><a name="CHAPTER_I" id="CHAPTER_I"></a>CHAPTER I.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">BESSIE AND I AND BESSIE&#8217;S MOTHER.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="floatleft">&#8220;</span><span class="dropcap">W</span>hy,</span> Charlie, you sha&#8217;n&#8217;t talk so about my
+mother! I won&#8217;t allow it.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;It does sound a little rough, my dear; but I
+can&#8217;t help it. She does exasperate me so. She
+doesn&#8217;t show a proper deference for your husband,
+my dear. We are married now, and she
+ought to give up her objections to me. I can&#8217;t be
+expected to place myself in her leading strings.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;But you mustn&#8217;t demand too much at once,
+and should try to conciliate her. Now do, for my
+sake; won&#8217;t you, dear?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Here we were, only a month married, and
+spending our honeymoon at a most charming
+summer resort, where there was no excuse for
+getting out of patience. Everything was beautiful
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_8" id="Page_8">[8]</a></span>and attractive: Little hotel, strange to say,
+quite delightful; no fault to find with surroundings
+and accommodations; my darling Bessie,
+as sweet as an angel and determined to be happy
+and to make me happy; everything, in short,
+calculated to give us a long summer of delight.</p>
+
+<p>That is, if Bessie had only been an orphan.
+But there was her mother, who had joined us
+on our summer trip, after the first two weeks of
+unalloyed happiness, and threatened to accompany
+us through life. Already it almost made
+the prospect dismal. The idea that Bessie and
+I would ever quarrel, or even have any impatient
+words together, had seemed to me to be simply
+ridiculous. I had seen what I had seen. My
+dashing friend, Fred, and his stylish wife,&mdash;they
+had been married two years, and a visible coldness
+had come upon them. I knew, by an occasional
+angry whisper and knitting of the brow before
+people, that he must sometimes swear and rave in
+the privacy of their own rooms, and her cutting
+replies or haughty indifference showed that there
+had been a deal of love lost between them in those
+two years.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[9]</a></span>Other people, too, got indifferent or downright
+hostile in their marital relations. But then, I was
+not a dashing fellow and Bessie was not stylish,
+and in other ways we were quite different from
+most people. Ours had been a real love-match
+from the first. Bessie was simple and unaffected,
+honest and pure in every thought, and determined
+to make me a faithful and loving wife till death
+did us part. As for me, why, of course I was generous
+and affectionate, ready to make any sacrifice
+and bear any burden for the trusting creature who
+had so freely given herself into my keeping.
+There should be no clouds to darken her life. I
+would never be selfish or impatient, or for one
+moment hurt her gentle heart by heedless act or
+careless word.</p>
+
+<p>But plague upon it! I could not get on with her
+mother; and here I was, before our summer holiday
+was over, and before we had settled down
+to that home life in which trouble and annoyance
+must needs come, getting out of patience and saying
+cruel things; and there was Bessie, sitting in
+the summer twilight with a light shawl drawn over
+her shoulders, pouting her pretty lips with vexation,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[10]</a></span>and digging the toes of her little boots into
+the balustrade in front of us, because I had expressed
+a pious wish that her mother was in Jericho.
+I declare, if there weren&#8217;t tears gathering
+in her gentle blue eyes!</p>
+
+<p>I was angry with myself, and, putting my arm
+around her slender waist, I laid my cheek against
+hers and said soothingly, &#8220;Never mind, darling! I
+didn&#8217;t mean it. Don&#8217;t think any more about it.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>But as we sat for the next five minutes without
+saying a word, I couldn&#8217;t help pondering on the
+possibilities of the future, for Mrs. Pinkerton was
+to live with us. That was one of the understood
+conditions of our bargain, and it was evident that
+she was to furnish the test of all my good resolutions.</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Pinkerton had been left a widow when
+Bessie was twelve years old, with a neat little cottage
+in the suburbs of the city and a snug competence
+in a secure investment. I was fairly settled
+in business, with an income that would enable us
+to live in modest comfort, and was determined
+not to disturb the investment or have it drawn
+upon in any way for household expenses. But
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[11]</a></span>the old lady&mdash;I already began to speak of her by
+that disrespectful epithet, although she was still
+under fifty&mdash;was to live with us. I had readily
+acquiesced in that arrangement, for was it not my
+darling&#8217;s wish? And I could not decently make
+any objection, for it was mighty convenient to
+have a pretty cottage, ready furnished, in one of
+the finest suburbs of the city in which I was employed.</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Pinkerton was a good woman in her way:
+how could she be anything else and the mother of
+such an angel as I had secured for my wife? She
+meant well, of course; I admitted that, and I
+ought to be on the pleasantest terms with her, and
+determined from the first that I would be. But
+somehow we were not congenial, and when that
+is the case the best people in the world find it
+hard to get along agreeably together.</p>
+
+<p>The course of true love between Bessie and me
+had run very smooth. From the moment my old
+school-fellow, her brother George, now in Paris
+studying medicine, had introduced me to her, I
+had been completely won by her sweet disposition
+and charming ways, and she in turn was captivated
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[12]</a></span>by my manly independence, strong good sense,
+and generous impulses. I am not vain, but the
+truth is the truth; and, as I am telling this story
+myself, I must set down the facts. We fell in love
+right away, and it was not long before we were
+mutually convinced that we were made expressly
+for each other and could never be happy apart.</p>
+
+<p>So it happened that I had to do the courting
+with the mother. She was the one to be won
+over, and it was not likely to be an easy task,
+for I plainly saw that she did not quite approve of
+me. When I was first introduced to her, she
+looked at me with her great, steady blue eyes, as
+if analyzing me to the very boots, and evidently
+set me down as a somewhat arrogant and self-sufficient
+young fellow who needed a judicious
+course of discipline to teach him humility. I was
+generally self-possessed and had no little confidence
+in myself, but I confess that I was embarrassed in
+her presence. She was not at all like Bessie, I
+thought. She had taught school in her youth, and
+had learned to command and be obeyed. The
+late Mr. Pinkerton, I fancied, had found it useless
+to contend against her authority, and this had
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[13]</a></span>increased her disposition to carry things her
+own way; and her seven years&#8217; widowhood,
+with its independence and self-reliance, had not
+prepared her to be submissive to the wishes of
+others.</p>
+
+<p>Still, she loved her daughter with tender devotion,
+and her chief anxiety was to have her every
+wish gratified. Therein was my advantage, for I
+knew that Bessie, gentle and trusting as she was,
+would never give me up or allow her life to be
+happy without the gratification of her first love.
+So I set to work confidently to make myself
+agreeable to the widow and win her consent to
+our marriage.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;You must bring mamma around to approve of
+it,&#8221; Bessie had said, on that ever-to-be-remembered
+evening, when we were returning from a
+long drive, and after an hour of sweet confidences
+she had surrendered herself without reserve to
+my future keeping. &#8220;She is the best mother in the
+world, and loves me very much, but she is peculiar
+in some ways, and I am afraid she doesn&#8217;t
+altogether like you. I would not for the world
+displease her, that is, if I could help it,&#8221; she
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[14]</a></span>added, glancing up, as much as to say, &#8220;It is all
+settled now forever and forevermore, whatever
+may befall, but do get my mother to consent to it
+with a good grace.&#8221;</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[15]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_II" id="CHAPTER_II"></a>CHAPTER II.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">COURTING THE MOTHER.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">M</span>rs. Pinkerton</span> sat in an easy-chair near
+the window, doing nothing, when I marched
+in to begin the siege. I felt diffident and uneasy,
+although I am not usually troubled that
+way. But if I should live to the advanced age of
+Methusaleh, I could never forget Mrs. Pinkerton&#8217;s
+appearance on that memorable occasion. Before
+I had spoken a word I saw that she knew what
+was coming, and had hardened her heart against
+me. She had anticipated all that I would say,
+had discounted my plea, as it were, and prejudged
+the whole case. Her look plainly said: &#8220;Young
+man, I know your pitiful story. You needn&#8217;t
+tell me. You may be very well as young men go,
+you fancy you can more than fill a mother&#8217;s place
+in Bessie&#8217;s inexperienced heart, but you can&#8217;t get
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_16" id="Page_16">[16]</a></span>me out. I am Adamant. Your intentions are all
+very honorable, but you are a graceless intruder.
+Your credentials are rejected on sight.&#8221; I saw the
+difficult task I had undertaken. &#8220;Mrs. Pinkerton,&#8221;
+I said, mustering all my forces, &#8220;it is no use
+mincing the matter, or beating about the shrubbery.
+I am in love with your daughter, and
+Bessie is in love with me. I believe I can make
+Bessie happy, and am sure nothing but Bessie can
+make me happy. I have come to ask your consent
+to our marriage.&#8221; Then I hung my head like
+a whipped school-boy.</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Pinkerton took off her eye-glasses, and
+then put them on again with considerable care;
+after which she leveled a look at me and through
+me that made me feel like calling out &#8220;Murder!&#8221;
+or making for the door. But I stood my ground,
+and heard her say quietly,&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;So you are engaged to my daughter?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>A simple remark, but the tone meant &#8220;You are
+a puppy.&#8221; I had to muster all my resolution to
+reply politely and coolly that, with her gracious
+consent, such was the fact.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Are you aware that it is customary to obtain
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[17]</a></span>parental consent before proceeding to such
+lengths?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Mrs. Pinkerton, excuse me. I thought in my
+ignorance that it would be just as well to do that
+afterwards; or rather, I didn&#8217;t think anything
+about it. I was so much in love with Bessie that it
+was all out before I knew it. If I had thought,
+of course I would have&mdash;&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Yes, yes,&#8221; said Mrs. Pinkerton, &#8220;if your kind
+of people ever thought, they would undoubtedly
+do differently. Bessie certainly ought to know
+better. Girls rush into matrimony now-a-days
+with as much carelessness as they would choose
+partners at a game of croquet. I should have
+been consulted in this. It is all wrong to allow
+young people to have such entire freedom in affairs
+of this kind as they are allowed in these days.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;But certainly, my dear Mrs. Pinkerton,&#8221; I
+said, becoming somewhat impatient, &#8220;you will
+not refuse your consent in this case? Bessie&#8217;s
+happiness&mdash;that is, the happiness of all of us, or&mdash;our
+happiness&mdash;Bessie&#8217;s and mine, I would
+say&mdash;&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No doubt your happiness is very important to
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[18]</a></span>yourself, Mr. Travers, and as to my daughter&#8217;s
+well-being, I have looked to that for quite a number
+of years past, and I flatter myself I shall be
+able to look out for it in the future.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Not if you insist on parting us!&#8221; I cried, getting
+out of patience and letting all my carefully
+prepared plans of assault go by the board. &#8220;You
+may withhold your consent, but that cannot prevent
+our loving each other!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Of course not. Nothing on earth can prevent
+young people who are in love from making themselves
+ridiculous. But getting married and living
+together soon cures them of sentimentalism.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Won&#8217;t you give us that chance to be cured
+then, my dear Mrs. Pinkerton?&#8221; I exclaimed, regaining
+a little tact.</p>
+
+<p>She seemed to be taking it under advisement,
+and my courage came up a little. Then, looking
+at me with her peculiarly searching gaze, she said,
+&#8220;It isn&#8217;t necessary to argue the case; I know
+all you would say. You love Bessie to distraction;
+you could not live without her; your heart
+would be hopelessly broken if you had to give
+her up; you will be true to her forever and a day;
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[19]</a></span>you offer her all of the good things of this world
+that any sane woman could desire, besides which
+you throw in an eternal, undying devotion; and
+so on, to the end of the chapter. We will consider
+that all said, and so save time and trouble.
+You think that ought to end the matter and bring
+me to your way of thinking. I wonder at the effrontery
+of young men, who walk into our households
+and carelessly tell us mothers what is best
+for our children, and assure us, between their
+puffs of tobacco smoke, that a case of three weeks&#8217;
+moonshining outweighs the devotion of a lifetime.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I began to see what course was open for me.
+The old lady was jealous, and I could not blame
+her. Her objections were general, not specific.
+Strategy must take the place of a direct assault.
+There flashed through my mind the ridiculous old
+nonsense rhyme quotation,&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&#8220;I must soften the heart of this terrible cow.&#8221;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p>I said gently, &#8220;I can readily see how a mother
+must regard the claims of the man who comes to
+her demanding her most precious treasure; and
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[20]</a></span>what you say makes me feel how presumptuous my
+demand must seem. I love your daughter&mdash;that
+must be my only excuse. And after all, what has
+happened was only what a mother must expect.
+Your daughter&#8217;s love will not be the less yours
+because she also loves the man of her choice. That
+she should love and be loved was inevitable.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;We will not go into the discussion any further,&#8221;
+she interrupted. &#8220;I don&#8217;t wish to say anything
+uncomplimentary of you personally, but I
+simply am not prepared to give my daughter up
+at present. My opinion of men in general is
+good, so long as they do not interfere with me or
+mine.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>(Mental note: &#8220;May there be precious little
+interference between us!&#8221;)</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Your judgment is doubtless good,&#8221; I said,
+smiling; &#8220;but there are exceptions which prove
+the rule, and I hope you will find that even I will
+improve upon acquaintance.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Your conceit is abominable, young man.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Thank you. I have found no one who could
+flatter me except myself, so I lose no opportunity
+to give myself a good character.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[21]</a></span>&#8220;Especially in addressing the mother of the
+woman you wish to marry, eh?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Precisely, as she is naturally prejudiced against
+me. My dear Mrs. Pinkerton, what must I do to
+please you?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Hold your tongue!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Anything but that. You admit that I am a
+good fellow enough, and that Bessie would probably
+marry some one in course of time. Now, I
+don&#8217;t see why you cannot make us both happy by
+giving your consent. It costs you a pang to do it.
+I honor you for that. Give me the right to console
+you.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;By making myself an object of pity? No,
+not yet, not yet. I must, at least, have time to
+think.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I inwardly cursed my luck. How long was
+this sort of thing going to last? I was about to
+rise and take my leave, when an inspiration
+struck me.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Mrs. Pinkerton,&#8221; I said gravely, &#8220;what you
+have said of the ties that exist between you and
+your daughter has touched me deeply. I believe
+we young people do not half appreciate a mother&#8217;s
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_22" id="Page_22">[22]</a></span>unchanging love. It lies so far beneath the surface
+that we are too apt to forget its constant
+blessing. My mother died when I was very
+young. Ah, if she were only here now, to plead
+my cause for me!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>With these words, I turned on my heel and
+hastily got out of the room. I went into the
+garden and lighted a cigar, the better to think
+over the situation. I could not determine what
+progress, if any, I had made in the good graces
+of Mrs. Pinkerton. While I was cogitating,
+Bessie came out and approached me with an
+inquiring look. I am afraid my returning glance
+did not greatly reassure her. As she came up
+and took my arm, she said,&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well! No, it&#8217;s not very well. I am beaten,
+my dear. Your mother is simply a stony-hearted
+parent!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;What did she say?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, she wants you to grow up an old maid&mdash;as
+if such a thing were possible!&mdash;and says that
+lovers have no idea of what a mean, cruel thing it
+is to rob people of only daughters; and that she
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[23]</a></span>shall require time to think of it. What do you
+think of that?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Bessie knitted her pretty brows, and dug her
+toes into the walk.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Perhaps I had better go to her?&#8221; she said.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Of course you must. But I know it won&#8217;t be
+of any use just yet. We must, as she says, give her
+time. She will come around all right at the end
+of nine or ten years. The fact is, Bessie, she&#8217;s
+a little bit jealous of me and regards me as an
+intruder.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Poor, dear mamma!&#8221; said Bessie, her eyes
+becoming moist.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Poor, dear pussy-cat! You should have seen
+her shoot me with her eyes and ridicule my honest
+sentiment. She used me roughly, my dear, and I
+can&#8217;t help wondering at my amazing politeness to
+her.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Bessie was not discouraged. She had several
+interviews with her mother, in which protestations,
+tears, smiles, and coaxings played a part, but
+there was no apparent change of heart on the part
+of the old lady, after all. I don&#8217;t know how long
+this disagreeable state of affairs would have continued
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_24" id="Page_24">[24]</a></span>under ordinary circumstances, had not an
+unexpected, thrilling, and, as it happened, fortunate
+occurrence hastened a crisis and brought an
+end to the siege. It was a very singular thing,
+and it seemed to have been pre-arranged to bring
+me glory, and, what was better, the desired goodwill
+of the &#8220;stony-hearted parent.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>If there was any one thing that the worthy Mrs.
+Pinkerton detested more than men and tobacco,
+that thing was a burglar. Add fear to detestation,
+and you will see that when I defended the
+old lady from the attentions of a burglar, I had
+taken a long step into her good graces.</p>
+
+<p>It was a week after the interview narrated above,
+and in the early summer, Mrs. Pinkerton had gone
+down to a quiet sea-side resort for a short stay,
+thinking to get away from me; but I was not to
+be put off so. I followed her, taking a room at
+the same hotel.</p>
+
+<p>About one o&#8217;clock at night, the particular burglar
+to whom I owe so much, effected an entrance
+into the hotel through a basement window, and
+quietly made his way up stairs. Every one was
+asleep except myself, and I was planning all sorts
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[25]</a></span>of expedients to conquer the prejudices of my
+mother-in-law that was to be. Mrs. Pinkerton&#8217;s
+room opened on a long corridor, near the end of
+which my modest seven-by-nine snuggery was situated.
+It was a warm night, and the transoms
+over the doors of almost all the bed-chambers had
+been left open to admit the air. A gleam of light
+from a dark-lantern, coming through my transom,
+was what led me to hastily don a pair of trousers
+and take my revolver from my valise. Then I
+opened my door very cautiously, without having
+struck a light, and could see&mdash;nothing! I waited
+a few moments, almost holding my breath. At
+the end of those few moments I could make out
+the form of a man swarming over the top of the
+door of Mrs. Pinkerton&#8217;s room. His head and
+shoulders were already inside the room, and I
+could see his legs wriggle about as he noiselessly
+wormed his way through the narrow transom. It
+took me but a brief second of time to glide forward
+on tiptoe and mount the same chair which
+had been used by the intruder in climbing to the
+transom. This done, I seized both the wriggling
+legs simultaneously, and gave a tremendous pull.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[26]</a></span>My excitement must have imbued me with
+double my natural strength, and the result of that
+pull was simply indescribable. Burglar, transom-glass,
+chair and all, went in a heap on the floor of
+the corridor, producing the most appalling and
+unearthly racket conceivable. The whole house
+was in an uproar in a moment. People seemed to
+spring up from every square foot of floor in the corridor
+as if by magic. Cries of &#8220;Fire!&#8221; &#8220;Murder!&#8221;
+&#8220;Help!&#8221; and screams of frightened women, rose
+on every hand. The costumes which I beheld on
+that momentous occasion were not only varied but
+exceedingly amusing and picturesque as well.
+The assembled multitude found nothing to interest
+them, however. I alone was to be seen, seated on
+a broken chair, with a rapidly swelling black eye,
+while broken glass and an extinguished lantern lay
+on the floor. I told the male guests what had happened.
+The burglar had not waited to ask for my
+card, but had contented himself with planting one
+blow from the shoulder on my left eye, before I
+could get upon my legs. And my revolver.
+Well, I had not had the ghost of a chance to use
+it. It was in my pocket. Fifteen minutes after
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[27]</a></span>the fracas, Mrs. Pinkerton came to my room, completely
+dressed, and insisted upon coming in to hear
+all about it and to overwhelm me with thanks and
+admiration. I was as modest as heroes proverbially
+are, and then and there told her never to refer
+to the subject again unless she addressed me as
+Bessie&#8217;s betrothed.</p>
+
+<p>We went riding together, Bessie, Mrs. Pinkerton,
+and I, the day after this episode; and without
+any previous indication of an approaching
+thaw, that singular old lady began to talk freely
+about what should be worn at &#8220;the wedding,&#8221;
+referring to it as though she had been the principal
+agent in bringing it about.</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_28" id="Page_28">[28]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_III" id="CHAPTER_III"></a>CHAPTER III.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">OUR MARRIAGE.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">S</span>o</span> it was that I brought my darling&#8217;s mother
+around to consent, if not with a very good
+grace, still with apparent cheerfulness, and she at
+once took the direction of the nuptial preparations.
+I made a show of consulting her about
+many things, but she invariably gave me to understand
+that her experience and superior knowledge
+in such matters were not to be gainsaid. I was willing
+to leave to her all the fuss and frippery of preparing
+clothes for her daughter. It always seemed
+to me that she had clothes enough, and clothes
+that were good enough for married life. I couldn&#8217;t
+understand why a young woman, on becoming a
+wife, should need a lot of new and elaborate dresses,
+such as she had never worn and never cared to
+wear, and an endless variety of under-garments
+of mysterious and incomprehensible make, with
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[29]</a></span>frills and fringes and laces and edgings, as if, up
+to that time, she had never had anything next to
+her precious person, except what was visible to the
+exterior world. And even assuming that she
+donned these things for the first time as parts of
+a manifold and complicated wedding garment, why
+should so much fine needle-work and delicate
+trimming be prepared to be stowed away out of
+sight of prying mortals, for whose vision women
+are presumed to dress themselves? Are they got
+up to show to friends and excite envy, and to fill
+the minds of other young people with a sense of
+the difficulties of getting married?</p>
+
+<p>One day, when I happened in,&mdash;by accident,
+of course,&mdash;and the mother happened
+to be out on one of her many pilgrimages
+to town, Bessie took me up to her room in
+a half-frightened way, as if doing something
+that she was afraid was terribly improper, and
+showed me a bewildering profusion of these
+things, neatly tucked away in bureau drawers.
+I laughed outright, and asked her who was to see
+all that finery. She was vexed and bit her lip,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_30" id="Page_30">[30]</a></span>and I was sorry and voted myself a brute. From
+that moment, I determined not to say a word
+about the clothes, except to express unstinted
+admiration.</p>
+
+<p>There was not only clothing, but blankets and
+quilts and bed linen, though we were to live in
+her old home, which was already well supplied.
+One would suppose that a large and sudden
+increase of family was expected at once. These
+things annoyed me as senseless, and as absorbing
+so much of my Bessie&#8217;s attention that we didn&#8217;t
+have half the blissful times together that we had
+before our engagement was an acknowledged
+thing. But I knew that it was the mother&#8217;s
+doings. Bessie did not really have any foolish
+care for dress, though always beautifully arrayed
+without any apparent effort; but she supposed it
+was the proper thing, and submitted to her
+mother.</p>
+
+<p>But there was one thing I set my heart on. I
+wanted a quiet wedding, without display or pretence.
+It did seem to me that this was a private
+occasion in which the wishes of the persons chiefly
+concerned should be consulted. It was their business
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_31" id="Page_31">[31]</a></span>and should be conducted in their own way.
+Bessie sympathized with me, and wanted of all
+things to go to church quietly and privately, and
+then, after a leave-taking with a few intimate
+friends at home, start right off on our proposed trip
+to the White Mountains. But no; we were inexperienced,
+and the widow knew what the occasion
+demanded much better than we did. She was a
+little grand in her ideas, and felt the importance of
+keeping on good terms with society. I was disposed
+to apply profane epithets to society, and to
+insist that this marriage was mine and Bessie&#8217;s, and
+nobody&#8217;s else. But what was the use? There would
+be unpleasant feelings, and the mamma must be conciliated,
+and so I yielded after a warm but altogether
+affectionate little controversy with Bessie.</p>
+
+<p>Every time I came to the house now, I was
+informed of some new feature which Mrs. P. had
+decided upon as indispensable to the gorgeousness
+of the occasion.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Have you ordered your dress suit yet?&#8221; she
+asked one evening.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Dress suit? Oh yes. I had almost forgotten
+that.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_32" id="Page_32">[32]</a></span>&#8220;And, by the way, those cards? I think you
+had better send them out: you write such a good,
+legible hand.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Y-e-s, oh yes. With pleasure.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;When you go to the city to-morrow, I wish
+you would drop in at Draper&#8217;s and get me a few
+little things. I have made out a list, so it won&#8217;t
+be any trouble to you.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No trouble at all. Glad to do it.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;That white ribbon should be medium width.
+And before I forget it, have you written yet to
+your friend De Forest about his standing up?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No, I forgot it. I&#8217;ll drop him a line to-morrow.
+But what do you want that ribbon to be so long for?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;That is to be held across the aisle by the
+ushers, you know, to keep off the <i>ignobile vulgus</i>.
+You and Bessie will march up <i>here</i>, you see,
+preceded by the four ushers and the bridesmaids
+and groomsmen, who will then range themselves
+off this way. The members of the families and
+the friends will be separated from the other people
+<i>thus</i>. It&#8217;s very pretty. Belle Graham was
+married that way at St. Thomas&#8217;s, and everybody
+said it was splendid.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_33" id="Page_33">[33]</a></span>This is the kind of talk I had to listen to for
+weeks, and is it any wonder that I grew thin and
+had sleepless nights?</p>
+
+<p>I was now a mere puppet in the hands of Mrs.
+Pinkerton, and came and went as she pulled the
+wires. She had arranged that the affair was to
+take place in &#8220;her church&#8221;&mdash;and a very fashionable
+temple of worship it was. Her rector was to
+officiate, assisted by the vealy young man who had
+just graduated from the theological seminary.
+There were to be four bridesmaids and an equal
+number of groomsmen and of ushers. I should have
+liked to have something to say about who should
+&#8220;stand up&#8221; with us, as Mrs. Pinkerton expressed
+it; but when I timidly suggested that some of my
+friends would be available for the purpose, I was
+taken aback to learn that the entire list had been
+made up and decided upon without my knowledge,
+and that only one of the groomsmen chosen was a
+friend of mine,&mdash;De Forest,&mdash;the others being
+young men whom the worthy Mrs. Pinkerton had
+selected from her list of society people. One of
+the young men was a downright fool, if I must call
+things by their right names, but he dressed to perfection;
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[34]</a></span>the remaining two I scarcely knew by
+sight, but I did know that one of them had seen
+the time when he aspired to occupy the place I
+was now filling in respect to the Pinkerton household:
+need I say more concerning my sentiments
+regarding him?</p>
+
+<p>The ushers,&mdash;well, of course, they were the
+four young gentlemen who knew everybody who
+was anybody, and I could not object to them,
+considering that they charged nothing for their
+onerous services.</p>
+
+<p>The bridesmaids were all old school friends of
+Bessie&#8217;s, and two of them were considered pretty,
+and the other two were stylish.</p>
+
+<p>One of my keenest regrets was that Bessie&#8217;s
+brother George was away off in Paris, and could
+not grace the occasion with his superb presence;
+for he was a superb fellow in all respects, and I
+felt a true brotherly affection for him. Had he
+not introduced me to Bessie? Had he not always
+wanted me to become his brother-in-law?</p>
+
+<p>The great day came at last. The town was full
+of the invited people, and the weather, so anxiously
+looked to on such occasions, was all that
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[35]</a></span>could be desired. My remembrance of the solemn
+events of that day is now rather misty. I
+remember the tussle De Forest and I had with my
+collar and cravat in the morning, and how he
+stuck pins into my neck, and wrestled mightily
+with his own elaborate toilet. I remember, and
+this very distinctly, how awfully tight were my
+new patent-leather boots, which caused me for the
+time being the most excruciating anguish. Beyond
+these, and similar minor things which have a way
+of sticking in the memory, all the rest is very
+much like a vivid dream. The close carriage
+whirling through the streets; a great crush of
+people, with here and there a familiar, smiling
+face; Bessie in her wedding-dress of white silk,
+with her long veil and twining garlands of orange
+blossoms; the bridesmaids, radiant in tarletan,
+with pretty blue bows and sashes; the long aisle,
+up which we marched with slow and reverent
+tread; the pealing measures of the Wedding Chorus;
+the dignified and fatherly clergyman; the
+vealy young assistant; the unction of the slowly
+intoned words of the marriage-service; the fumbling
+for the ring,&mdash;and through it all there rises,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_36" id="Page_36">[36]</a></span>as out of a mist, the face of my mother-in-law, the
+presiding genius of it all, the unknown quantity in
+the equation of my married life, now begun amid
+the felicitations, more or less sincere, of a host of
+kissing, hand-shaking, smiling, chattering, good-natured
+aunts, uncles, cousins, and relatives of all
+degrees.</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_37" id="Page_37">[37]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_IV" id="CHAPTER_IV"></a>CHAPTER IV.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">MOUNTAINS AND MORE MOTHER-IN-LAW.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">S</span>o</span> the bells were rung, metaphorically speaking,
+and we were wed. I had a long leave
+of absence from the banking-house in which I
+held a responsible and confidential position, and
+we started for the mountains, leaving mamma
+Pinkerton to put things to rights and follow us in
+a fortnight, when we had decided to settle down
+for a month&#8217;s quiet stay in a picturesque town of
+the mountain region. Oh, the unrestrained joy of
+that fortnight! Everybody at the hotels seemed
+to know by instinct that we were a newly-married
+pair, and knowing glances passed between them.
+But what did we care? With pride and a conscious
+embarrassment that made my hand tremble,
+I wrote on the registers in a bold hand &#8220;Charles
+Travers and wife.&#8221; I asked for the best room
+with a pleasant out-look. The smiling clerk,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_38" id="Page_38">[38]</a></span>trained to dissimulation, would appear as unconscious
+as the blank safe behind him, but he knew
+all the while, the sly rascal, that we were on a
+wedding trip, and he paid special attention to our
+comfort. We saw the glories and wonders of the
+mountains, and shared their inspiration as with a
+single heart. We rose early to drink the clear air
+and greet the rising sun together. We strolled
+out in the evening to romantic spots, and there,
+with arms around each other, as we walked or
+stood gazing on the scene and listening to the
+rustling breeze, we were happy. For two weeks
+our lives blended with each other and with nature,
+and it was with a sigh that we mounted the lumbering
+stage to take up our sojourn in the retired
+town on the hills. We came to the little hotel
+just at night, and were stared at and commented
+upon by those who had been there three days and
+assumed the air of having had possession for years.
+We were tired, and kept aloof that evening, and
+the next day mother-in-law arrived.</p>
+
+<p>As she dismounted from the coach, she gave the
+driver a severe warning to be careful of her trunk,
+an iron-bound treasure that would have defied the
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_39" id="Page_39">[39]</a></span>efforts of the most determined baggage-smasher.
+Bessie had flown to meet her, and their greeting was
+affectionate; but to me the old lady presented a
+hand encased in a mitt, or sort of glove with amputated
+fingers, and gave me a stately, &#8220;I hope you
+are well, sir,&#8221; that rather made me feel sick. She
+looked full at me in her steady and commanding
+way, as much as to say, &#8220;Well, you have committed
+no atrocious crime yet, I suppose; but I
+am rather surprised at it.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>If there is anything I pride myself on, it is self-possession
+and a willingness to face anybody and
+give as good as I get, but that magnificently imperious
+way of looking with those large eyes
+always disconcerted me. I could not brace myself
+enough to meet them with any show of impudence,
+though the old lady had not ceased to
+regard that as the chief trait of my character. As
+Mrs. Pinkerton trod with stately step the rude
+piazza of that summer hotel, she put her eye-glasses
+on and surveyed its occupants with a look that
+made them shrink into themselves and feel ashamed
+to be sitting about in that idle way. I believe the
+old lady&#8217;s eyesight was good enough, and that she
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_40" id="Page_40">[40]</a></span>used her glasses, with their gold bows and the
+slender chain with which they were suspended
+about her neck, for effect. I noticed that if they
+were not on she always put them on to look at
+anything, and if they happened to be on she took
+them off for the same purpose.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well,&#8221; she said, going into the little parlor, and
+looking from the windows, &#8220;this really seems to be
+a fine situation. The view of the mountains is quite
+grand.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Very kind of you to approve of the mountains,
+but you could give them points on grandeur,&#8221;
+I thought; but I merely remarked, &#8220;We find it
+quite pleasant here.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>She turned and glanced at me without reply,
+as much as to say, &#8220;Who addressed you, sir?
+You would do well to speak when you are spoken
+to.&#8221; I was abashed, but was determined to do
+the agreeable so far as I could, in spite of the
+rebuke of those eyes.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;The house doesn&#8217;t seem to me to be very attractive,&#8221;
+she continued, glancing around with a gaze
+that took in everything through all the partition
+walls, and assuming a tone that meant, &#8220;I am
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_41" id="Page_41">[41]</a></span>speaking to you, Bessie, and no one else.&#8221; &#8220;What
+sort of people are there here?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, some very pleasant people, I should
+judge,&#8221; said Bessie, &#8220;but we have been here only
+one day, you know, and have made no acquaintances
+to speak of. Charlie&#8217;s friend, Fred Marston,
+from the city, is here with his wife; and I
+met a young lady to whom I took quite a fancy
+this morning, a Miss Van Duzen. She is quite
+wealthy, and an orphan, and is here with her
+uncle, a fine-looking gentleman, who is president
+of a bank, or an insurance company, or some
+thing of the sort. You saw him, I think, on the
+piazza,&mdash;the large man, with gray side-whiskers,
+white vest, and heavy gold chain.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Yes, I noticed him. A pompous-looking old
+gentleman, isn&#8217;t he?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, he is dignified in his manner, but not at
+all pompous,&#8221; was the reply.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, I call him pompous, if looks mean anything,&#8221;
+said the mother, with the air of one to
+whom looks were quite sufficient. &#8220;I think I
+will go to my room,&#8221; she added, and turned a
+glance on me, as much as to say, &#8220;You needn&#8217;t
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_42" id="Page_42">[42]</a></span>come, sir.&#8221; I had no intention of going, and
+wandered out on the piazza, feeling as though
+Bessie had almost been taken away from me
+again.</p>
+
+<p>When she rejoined me, leaving her mother
+above stairs, I asked, &#8220;What does she think of
+her room?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, it doesn&#8217;t quite suit her. She thinks
+the furniture scanty and shabby, water scarce,
+towels rather coarse, and she can&#8217;t endure the
+sight of a kerosene lamp; but she will make herself
+quite comfortable, I dare say.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;And everybody else uncomfortable,&#8221; I felt
+like adding, but restrained myself.</p>
+
+<p>She came down to tea, and being offered a seat
+on the other side of me from Bessie, firmly declined
+it, and took the one on the other side of her
+daughter from me. As she unfolded her napkin
+she took in the whole table with a searching glance,
+and had formed a quick estimate of everybody
+sitting around it. Miss Clara Van Duzen and Mr.
+Desmond, her uncle, sat opposite, and an introduction
+across the table took place. The young lady
+was vivacious and talkative, and tried to make herself
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_43" id="Page_43">[43]</a></span>agreeable, but my mother-in-law did not like
+what she afterwards called her &#8220;chatter,&#8221; and set
+her down as a frivolous young person. &#8220;Miss
+Van,&#8221; as everybody called her, with her own approval,&mdash;for,
+as she said, she detested the Duzen
+which her Dutch ancestors had bequeathed her with
+their other property,&mdash;was of New York Knickerbocker
+origin, now living with her uncle in Boston,
+and was by no means frivolous, though uncommonly
+lively. She had fine, brown eyes, beautiful
+hair, and a complexion that defied sun and wind.
+It had the rosy glow of health, and indicated a
+good digestion and high spirits. Mr. Desmond
+seemed to be mostly white vest, immaculate shirt-front,
+and gold chain, the last-named article being
+very heavy and meandering through the button-holes
+of his vest and up around his invisible neck.
+He said little, and was evidently not much given
+to light conversation. He was very gracious in his
+attentions to the ladies, however, and seemed to
+pay special deference to Mrs. Pinkerton. I afterwards
+learned that he was a widower of long standing,
+without chick or child, and the guardian of his
+niece, whom he regarded with great admiration.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_44" id="Page_44">[44]</a></span>Down at the other end of the table was Marston,
+evidently giving vent to his impatience
+about something, and his wife, with fierce eyes,
+telling him, in manner if not in words, not to
+make a fool of himself. The rest of the company
+was made up either of transient visitors or
+of persons with whom this story has nothing in
+particular to do.</p>
+
+<p>As we emerged on the piazza after tea, Fred,
+who had impolitely gone out in advance, called
+out, &#8220;Charlie, old boy, come over here and have
+a smoke!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I must confess that these long sittings on the
+piazzas of summer hotels had lured me back to
+my old habits, which I had forsworn in my efforts
+to conciliate Bessie&#8217;s mother. Bessie had
+encouraged me in it, for to tell the truth she
+rather liked the fragrance of a good cigar, and
+dearly loved to see me enjoying it. It was my
+nature to defy the whole world and be master of
+my own habits, but I had felt a mean inclination,
+after mother-in-law joined the party, to slink away
+and smoke on the sly. There was nothing for it
+now, however, but to put on a bold face, or play
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_45" id="Page_45">[45]</a></span>the hypocrite and pretend I didn&#8217;t smoke. The
+latter I would not do, and if I had attempted it,
+it wouldn&#8217;t go down with Fred, and I should have
+been in a worse predicament than ever. I went
+boldly across the piazza and took the proffered
+cigar. Glancing out at the corner of my eye as
+I was lighting it, I saw my mother-in-law regarding
+me through her glasses with increased disfavor.
+She did not, however, seem to be surprised,
+and doubtless believed me capable of any perfidy.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I say, Charlie, old boy, let&#8217;s have a game of
+billiards,&#8221; said Fred, after a few puffs. &#8220;I&#8217;ll give
+you twenty points and beat you out of your boots.&#8221;
+Now I was very fond of billiards, and usually
+didn&#8217;t care who knew it, but Mrs. Pinkerton did
+not approve of the game, and had no knowledge
+that I indulged in it. But Fred would speak in
+that absurd shouting way of his, and all the ladies
+heard him. Again I mustered up resolution and
+went into the billiard room, but I played very
+indifferently, and was thinking all the time of my
+mother-in-law and her opinion of me. I really
+wanted to get into her good graces, but it required
+the sacrifice of all my own inclinations, and I
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_46" id="Page_46">[46]</a></span>despised a man who deliberately played the hypocrite
+to win anybody&#8217;s favor.</p>
+
+<p>After two or three listless games I said to Fred,
+&#8220;I guess I will join the ladies.&#8221; I was feeling
+some qualms of conscience for staying away from
+Bessie a whole hour at once.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, hang the ladies!&#8221; was Fred&#8217;s graceless
+response; &#8220;they can take care of themselves. My
+wife gets along well enough without me, I know,
+and yours will soon learn to be quite comfortable
+without your guardian presence; besides she&#8217;s got
+her mother now. By the way, what a mighty
+grand old dowager Mrs. Pink is!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Pinkerton is her name,&#8221; I said, a little haughtily,
+as if resenting the liberty he took with my
+mother-in-law&#8217;s cognomen.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, yes, I know, but the name is too long; and
+besides, she reminds one of a full-blown pink, a
+little on the fade, perhaps, but still with a good
+deal of bloom about her. Is she going to live
+with you? Precious fine time you will have!&#8221; he
+added, having received his answer by a nod.
+&#8220;She&#8217;ll boss the shebang, you bet!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, I guess not,&#8221; I answered, not liking his
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_47" id="Page_47">[47]</a></span>slangy way of talking about my affairs, and resolving
+in my own mind that I would be master in
+my own house.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, then there&#8217;ll be a fine old tussle for
+supremacy, and don&#8217;t you forget it!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>With this remark Fred wandered off down the
+dusty road, humming Madame Angot, and I drew
+up a chair by Bessie&#8217;s side. She had evidently
+been wishing I would come. Mr. Desmond was
+sitting a little apart from the rest, twisting his
+fingers in his watch-chain and looking intently at
+the mountain-top opposite, as if expecting somebody
+to come over with a dispatch for him. Mrs.
+Pinkerton sat by her daughter&#8217;s side in calm
+grandeur, her gray puffs&mdash;that fine silver-gray
+that comes prematurely on aristocratic brows&mdash;seeming
+like appendages of a queenly diadem.
+Miss Van had been diverting the company with a
+lively account of her day&#8217;s adventures. She was
+always having adventures, and had a faculty of
+relating them that was little short of genius.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, my dear, are you having a good time?&#8221;
+I murmured in Bessie&#8217;s ear.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, yes; but I was feeling a little lonesome
+without you.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_48" id="Page_48">[48]</a></span>The conversation degenerated into commonplace
+about the scenery and points of interest in
+the neighborhood, and after a while the company
+dispersed with polite good-evenings.</p>
+
+<p>When we reached our room, I remarked to
+Bessie, who seemed more quiet than usual, &#8220;I
+hope your mother will like it here.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, yes, I guess she will like it when she has
+been here a little while,&#8221; was the answer. &#8220;You
+know she has not been away from home much, of
+late years, except to the seaside with the Watsons
+and other of her old friends, and she does not
+adapt herself readily to strange company.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I said nothing more, but was absorbed in
+thought about my mother-in-law. It is evident
+by this time that she was no ordinary woman, no
+coarse or waspish mother-in-law, but a woman of
+good breeding and the highest character. She
+was intelligent and well-informed, a consistent
+member of the Episcopal Church, with the highest
+views of propriety and a reverential regard for
+the rules of conduct laid down by good society.
+This made her all the harder to deal with. If she
+were a common or vulgar sort of mother-in-law,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_49" id="Page_49">[49]</a></span>I could assert my prerogatives without compunction;
+and I was forced to admit that she was a
+very worthy woman, and not given to petty
+meddling, but I felt that her presence was an
+awful restraint. Without her we could have such
+good times, going and coming as we pleased, and
+acting with entire freedom; but she must be
+counted in, and was a factor that materially
+affected the result. She could not be ignored;
+her opinions could not be disregarded. That
+would be rude, and besides, their influence would
+make itself felt. Strange, the irresistible effect of
+a presence upon one! She might not openly interfere
+or directly oppose, but there she was, and
+she didn&#8217;t approve of me or like my friends,
+could not fall in with my ways or my wishes, and
+make one of any company in which I should feel
+at ease, and I knew that her presence would be
+depressing, and spoil our summer&#8217;s pleasure; and
+after that was over and we were at home, what?
+Well, sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.
+We slept the sound sleep that mountain and
+country quiet brings, and took the chances of the
+future.</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_50" id="Page_50">[50]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_V" id="CHAPTER_V"></a>CHAPTER V.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">THE RISE AND FALL.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">D</span>uring</span> the next week of our stay at the
+Fairview hotel, it grew rather dull. There
+was little to do but drive on the long country
+roads, or wander over the hills and in the fields
+and woods. I could have found plenty of pleasure
+in that with Bessie and a party of congenial
+friends, but it didn&#8217;t seem to be right always to
+leave my worthy mother-in-law behind, with her
+crochet work or the last new novel from the city,
+on the sunny piazza or in her dim little chamber.
+She was not averse to drives, in fact enjoyed them
+very much, but she seemed to divine that I did
+not really want her company, though I protested,
+as became a dutiful son-in-law, that I should be
+very glad to take her at any time. She did go
+with us once or twice, but the laughter and romping
+behavior which gave our rides their chief zest
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_51" id="Page_51">[51]</a></span>were extinguished, and we jogged along in the
+most proper manner, professing admiration for the
+outlines of the hills and the far-away stretches of
+scenery between the more distant mountains. We
+returned as quiet and demure as if we had been to
+a funeral. Mrs. Pinkerton saw the effect, and with
+her fine feeling of independence, she politely but
+firmly declined to go afterwards. As for walking
+on anything but level sidewalks or gravel-paths,
+she could not think of such a thing. The idea of
+her climbing a hill or getting herself over a fence
+seemed ridiculous to anybody that knew her.</p>
+
+<p>So it was that we were continually forced to
+leave her behind, or deny ourselves the chief recreation
+of the country. I was sincerely disinclined
+to slight her in any way, and desirous of
+contributing to her pleasure, but what could I do?
+A fellow can&#8217;t get an iceberg to enjoy tropical sunshine.
+Our dislike to leave the old lady alone,
+although she insisted that she didn&#8217;t mind it at
+all, led us to pass a large portion of each day,
+sometimes all day, about the house. It was
+&#8220;deuced stupid,&#8221; to use Marston&#8217;s elegant phrase,
+but there was little to do for it. To be sure,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_52" id="Page_52">[52]</a></span>there was Desmond, &#8220;old Dives,&#8221; Fred called him.
+He seldom went out of sight of the house, but he
+had a perfect mail-bag of newspapers and letters
+every morning, and spent the forenoon indoors,
+holding sweet communion with them and answering
+his correspondents. In the afternoon he sat
+on the piazza by the hour, contemplating the
+mountain-top that had such a fascination for him.
+He had a prodigious amount of information on
+all manner of subjects, and a quick and accurate
+judgment; but he was generally very reticent,
+as he tipped back in his chair and twisted his
+fingers in and out of that fine gold chain. My
+mother-in-law, from her shady nook of the piazza,
+would glance at him occasionally from her work
+or her book, as much as to say, &#8220;It is strange
+people can&#8217;t make some effort to be agreeable,
+instead of being so stiff and dignified all the
+afternoon&#8221;; but he seemed unconscious of her
+looks and her mental comments. His thoughts
+were probably in the marts of trade.</p>
+
+<p>Fred was continually going off to distant towns,
+or down to the great hotels in the mountains, for
+livelier diversion. His wife often insisted on
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_53" id="Page_53">[53]</a></span>going with him, to his evident disgust, not
+because she cared to be in his company, but
+because she wanted to go to the same places and
+could not well go alone. Now, Fred wasn&#8217;t a
+bad fellow at heart. I had known him for years,
+and used to like him exceedingly. But he was
+left without a father at an early age, with a considerable
+fortune, and his mother was indulgent and
+not overwise. He got rather fast as he grew up,
+and then he contracted a thoughtless marriage
+with Lizzie Carleton, a handsome and stylish young
+lady, fond of dress and gay society, and without
+a notion of domestic responsibility or duty.
+Like most women who are not positively bad,
+she had in her heart a desire to be right, but she
+didn&#8217;t know how. She was all impulse, and gave
+way to whims and feelings, as if helpless in any
+effort to manage her own waywardness. As a
+natural consequence there were constant jars
+between the pair. Fred took to his clubs and
+mingled with men of the race-course and the billiard
+halls, and Lizzie beguiled herself as best she
+could with her fashionable friends.</p>
+
+<p>And where was Miss Van Duzen these long and
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_54" id="Page_54">[54]</a></span>tedious days? They were never tedious to her,
+for she was always on the go. She would go off
+alone on interminable strolls, and bring back loads
+of flowers and strange plants, and she could tell
+all about them too. Her knowledge of botany
+was wonderful, and she could make very clever
+sketches; she would sit by the hour on some lonely
+rock, putting picturesque scenery on paper, just for
+the love of it; for when the pictures were done she
+would give them away or throw them away without
+the least compunction. She had a fine sense
+of the ludicrous and was all the time seeing funny
+things, which she described in a manner quite inimitable.
+She had grown up in New York, before
+her father&#8217;s death, in the most select of Knickerbocker
+circles, but there was not a trace of aristocracy
+in her ways. She was sociable with the
+ostler and the office-boy, and agreeable to the
+neighboring farmers, talking with them with a
+spirit that quite delighted them. And yet there
+was nothing free and easy in her ways that encouraged
+undue familiarity. It was merely natural
+ease and good nature. She inspired respect in
+everybody but my mother-in-law, who was puzzled
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_55" id="Page_55">[55]</a></span>with her conduct, so different from her own ideas
+of propriety, and yet so free from real vulgarity.
+Mrs. Pinkerton could by no means approve of her,
+and yet she could accuse her of no offence which
+the most rigid could seriously censure.</p>
+
+<p>Miss Van was the life of the company when
+she was about, telling of her adventures, getting
+up impromptu amusements in the parlor, and
+planning excursions. She was the only person
+in the world, probably, who was quite familiar
+with Mr. Desmond, and she would sit on his
+knee, pull his whiskers, and call him an &#8220;awful
+glum old fogy,&#8221; whereat he would laugh and say
+she had gayety enough for them both. He admired
+and loved her for the very qualities that he
+lacked.</p>
+
+<p>All this while I was trying to win the gracious
+favor of my mother-in-law, but it was up-hill
+work. She would answer me with severe politeness,
+and volunteer an occasional remark intended
+to be pleasant, but the moment I seemed to be
+gaining headway, a turn at billiards with Marston,
+for whom she had a great aversion, a thoughtless
+expression with a flavor of profanity in it, or my
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_56" id="Page_56">[56]</a></span>cigars, which I now indulged in without restraint,
+brought back her freezing air of disapproval.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, dear!&#8221; I yawned sometimes, &#8220;why can&#8217;t I
+go ahead and enjoy myself without minding that
+very respectable and severe old woman?&#8221; But I
+couldn&#8217;t do it. I was always feeling the influence
+of those eyes, and even of her thoughts. I
+couldn&#8217;t get away from it. Sunday came, and
+Mrs. Pinkerton expressed the hope that we were
+to attend divine service together. I hadn&#8217;t
+thought of it till that moment, and then it struck
+me as a terrible bore. There was no church
+within ten miles except a little white, meek edifice
+in the neighboring village, occupied alternately
+by Methodist and Baptist expounders of a
+very Calvinistic, and, to me, a very unattractive
+sort of religion. It was not altogether to my
+mother-in-law&#8217;s liking, but she regarded any
+church as far better than none.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I presume you will go, sir,&#8221; she said, addressing
+me when I made no reply to the previous hint.
+She always used &#8220;sir,&#8221; with a peculiar emphasis,
+when any suggestion was intended to have the
+force of a command.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_57" id="Page_57">[57]</a></span>&#8220;Well, really, I had not thought about it,&#8221; I
+said, rather vexed, as I secretly made up my mind,
+reckless of my policy of conciliation, that I would
+not go at any price. A tedious, droning sermon
+of an hour and perhaps an hour and a half in a
+country church, full of dismal doctrines,&mdash;the
+sermon, not the church,&mdash;I couldn&#8217;t stand, I
+thought.</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Pinkerton&#8217;s eyes were upon me, waiting
+for a more definite answer. &#8220;I&mdash;well, no, I don&#8217;t
+think I really feel like it this morning. I thought
+I would read to Bessie quietly in our room, and
+take a rest.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Very well, sir,&#8221; she said, &#8220;Bessie and I will
+walk down to the village.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;The deuce you will!&#8221; I thought; &#8220;walk a mile
+and a half on a dusty road; to be bored!&#8221; I
+knew it was useless to protest, and I was too wilful
+to take back what I had said, have the team
+harnessed, and go, like a good fellow, to church.
+&#8220;No, I&#8217;ll be blowed if I do!&#8221; I muttered.</p>
+
+<p>So off went the widow and her daughter without
+me. Bessie tripped around to me on the piazza,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_58" id="Page_58">[58]</a></span>looking like a fairy in her white dress and bit of
+blue ribbon, gave me a sweet kiss, and said, &#8220;I&#8217;ll
+be back before dinner. Have a nice quiet time,
+now.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, yes; have a nice quiet time, and you gone
+off with that old dragon!&#8221; It was a wicked
+thought, for she was not a bit of a dragon, but
+the feeling came over me that I was going to feel
+miserable all the forenoon, and so I did. Miss
+Van and her uncle had gone early to the neighboring
+town, the largest in the county, for church and
+the opportunity of observing; Fred and his wife
+had gone, the night before, round to the other
+side of the mountains, where there was to be a
+sort of ball or hop at the leading hotel; and the
+rest of the people in the house might as well have
+been in the moon, for all that I cared about them.
+A nice quiet time! Oh, yes; lounging about and
+trying to think of something besides Mrs. Pinkerton
+and my own shabby behavior. I would ten
+times rather have been in the dullest country
+church that ever echoed to the voice of the old
+and unimproved theology of Calvin&#8217;s day. But I
+was in for it, and lay in the hammock and looked
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_59" id="Page_59">[59]</a></span>through the stables, tried to read, tried to sleep,
+started on a walk and came back, and almost
+cursed the quiet country Sunday, as specially calculated
+to make a man of sense feel wretched.</p>
+
+<p>At last Bessie and her mother returned, and we
+had dinner. In the afternoon I was an outcast
+from Mrs. Pinkerton&#8217;s favor, but I had Bessie and
+read to her, and, on the whole, got through the
+rest of the day comfortably.</p>
+
+<p>The week following I began to feel that this
+was getting tiresome. Under other circumstances
+it might be very pleasant, but really I began to
+doubt whether I was enjoying it. But I made up
+my mind that during these days of leisure I
+ought to be making progress in the favor of my
+mother-in-law, with whom I was destined to live,
+nobody could say how many years. I couldn&#8217;t
+and wouldn&#8217;t make a martyr or a hypocrite of
+myself. I wouldn&#8217;t conceal my actions or deny
+myself freedom. So I smoked with Fred, played
+billiards, rolled ten-pins with Fred&#8217;s wife and
+Miss Van, and even beguiled Bessie into that vigorous
+and healthful exercise, which brought a gentle
+reprimand from her mother, addressed to her
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_60" id="Page_60">[60]</a></span>but directed at me. She did not think that kind
+of amusement becoming to ladies who had a
+proper respect for themselves.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Why, mamma, Miss Van Duzen plays, and
+says she thinks it jolly fun,&#8221; said Bessie innocently.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;That doesn&#8217;t alter the case in the least,&#8221; was
+the rejoinder. &#8220;Miss Van Duzen can judge for
+herself. I don&#8217;t think it proper. Besides, your
+husband&#8217;s familiar way with those ladies&mdash;one of
+whom is married and no better than she ought to
+be, if appearances mean anything&mdash;does not please
+me at all.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;O mamma, how absurd! I see no harm in it
+at all, and poor Lizzie, I am sure, never means
+any harm.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, well, my dear, I don&#8217;t wish to say anything
+about other people, and I only hope you
+will never have occasion to see any harm in your
+husband&#8217;s evident preference for the company of
+people with loose notions about proper and becoming
+behavior.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>On Saturday of that week a little incident
+occurred that raised me perceptibly in Mrs.
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_61" id="Page_61">[61]</a></span>Pinkerton&#8217;s estimation. The great, lumbering
+stage-coach came up just at evening, more heavily
+laden than usual, and top-heavy with trunks piled
+up on the roof. The driver dashed along with his
+customary recklessness, the six horses breaking
+into a canter as they turned to come up the rather
+steep acclivity to the house. The coach was
+drawn about a foot from its usual rut, one of the
+wheels struck a projecting stone, and over went
+the huge vehicle, passengers, trunks, and all. The
+driver took a terrible leap and was stunned. The
+horses stopped and looked calmly around on the
+havoc. There was great consternation in and
+about the house. Here my natural self-possession
+came into full play. I took command of the
+situation at once, directed prompt and vigorous
+efforts to the extrication of the passengers, had
+the injured ones taken into the house, applied
+proper restoratives, and in a few minutes ascertained
+that only one was seriously hurt. She was
+a young girl, who had insisted on riding outside,
+higher up even than the driver. She had been
+thrown headlong, striking, fortunately, on the
+grass, but terribly bruising one side of her face and
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_62" id="Page_62">[62]</a></span>dislocating her left shoulder. In a trice I had
+made her as comfortable as possible; dashed down
+to the village for the nearest doctor, having had
+the forethought to order a team harnessed in anticipation
+of such a necessity; and, having started
+the doctor up in a hurry, kept on to the neighboring
+county town for a surgeon who had considerable
+local reputation. I had him on the ground in
+a surprisingly short time, and before bedtime the
+unfortunate girl was put in the way of recovery,
+having received no internal injury.</p>
+
+<p>My behavior in this affair, as I said, gave me a
+lift in my mother-in-law&#8217;s estimation, and of course
+filled Bessie with the most unbounded admiration,
+though I had never thought of the moral effect
+of my action. In the morning I determined to
+follow up my advantage. It was Sunday again,
+and I bespoke the team early, to go to the neighboring
+town, where there was an Episcopal
+church, and where, for that day, a distinguished
+divine from the city, who was spending his vacation
+in those parts, was to hold forth. When I
+had announced my preparation for the religious
+observance of the day, I actually received what was
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_63" id="Page_63">[63]</a></span>almost a smile of approval from my mother-in-law.
+I enjoyed the ride, and was not greatly bored by the
+service, for I was thinking of something else most
+of the time, or amusing my mind with the native
+congregation. We got back late to dinner, and
+the rest had left the dining-room. The ladies
+went in without removing their bonnets, and after
+dinner retired to their rooms.</p>
+
+<p>As I came out on the piazza, Fred, who was
+walking about in a restless way, puffing his cigar
+with a sort of ferocity, as though determined to
+put it through as speedily as possible, shouted,
+&#8220;Hello! Charlie, old boy, where the eternal furies
+have you been? Here I have been about this
+dead, sleepy, stupid place all the morning, with
+nothing to do and nobody to speak to!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Why, where&#8217;s Mrs. M.?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Lib? Oh, she&#8217;s been here, but then she was
+reading a ghastly stupid novel, and wasn&#8217;t company;
+and she went off to the big boarding-house
+down the road half a mile, to dine with a friend.
+I wouldn&#8217;t go to the blasted place, and really
+think she didn&#8217;t want me to. But where in
+thunder were you all the while?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_64" id="Page_64">[64]</a></span>&#8220;At church, to be sure, with my wife and her
+mother.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, yes!&#8221; was the reply, peculiarly prolonged,
+as if the idea never occurred to him before. &#8220;How
+long since you became so pious, old man?
+Didn&#8217;t suppose you knew what the inside of a
+church was used for. The outside is mainly useful
+to put a clock on, where it can be seen. Old
+Pink,&mdash;beg pardon! Mrs. Pinkerton,&mdash;I suppose,
+dragged you along by main force.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Not at all. I went of my own motion; in fact,
+suggested it to the ladies.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;You don&#8217;t say so! Well, I see she is bringing
+you around. It is she that is destined to gain
+the supremacy.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Pshaw! Is my going to church such an indication
+of submission? It wouldn&#8217;t do you any
+harm to go to church once in a while, Fred.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, I don&#8217;t know about that,&#8221; he said, taking
+out his cigar, and stretching his feet to the top
+of the balustrade; &#8220;I don&#8217;t know about that. I
+am afraid it might be the ruin of me. I might
+become awfully pious, and then what a stick and
+a moping man of rags I should become. I tell
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_65" id="Page_65">[65]</a></span>you, Charlie, my boy, there&#8217;s many a good fellow
+spoilt by too much church and Sunday school.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Perhaps,&#8221; I replied, &#8220;but you and I are beyond
+danger.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, yes, but you can&#8217;t be too careful of
+yourself, you know.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>There was no answering that, and we relapsed
+into commonplace, and finished our cigars.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Where&#8217;s old Dives to-day, and his charming
+niece, the lively Van?&#8221; asked Fred, after an
+uncommon fit of silent contemplation.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;They went over to some town thirty or forty
+miles away, yesterday, and haven&#8217;t got back,&#8221;
+I replied.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I tell you, that girl knows how to circumvent
+these stupid Sundays, don&#8217;t she, though? And
+she takes old Dives along wherever she wants to
+go. I believe she would take him where the
+other Dives went, if she was disposed to take a
+trip there herself. But, holy Jerusalem! what
+are we to do to get through the rest of the day.
+No company, no billiards, no fishing. Confound
+the prejudices of society. I tell you, it is just
+such women as that mother-in-law of yours that
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_66" id="Page_66">[66]</a></span>keep society intimidated, as it were, into artificial
+proprieties. Now where&#8217;s the harm of a
+pleasant game on a Sunday, more than sitting
+here and grumbling and cursing because there&#8217;s
+nothing to do?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I made no reply, and Fred lighted another cigar.
+He was evidently thinking of something. &#8220;Look
+here, old fellow,&#8221; he said at length in an undertone,
+something very unusual with him, &#8220;come up to
+my room. You haven&#8217;t seen it. Lib won&#8217;t be back
+till teatime, and perhaps we can find something to
+amuse ourselves.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>He led the way and I followed, thinking no
+harm. His room was up stairs and on the back
+of the house, looking up the great hill that stretched
+back to the clouds. As we entered, I found he
+had brought a good many things with him, and
+given the room much the air of the quarters of a
+bachelor in the city. His sleeping-room was separate
+from that, and formed a sort of boudoir for his
+wife. He motioned me to an easy-chair, set a box
+of fine cigars on the table, and going to the closet
+brought out a decanter of sherry and some glasses.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;In these cursed places, you can get nothing to
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_67" id="Page_67">[67]</a></span>drink,&#8221; he said, &#8220;unless on the sly, and I hate that;
+so I bring along my own beverages, you see.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I saw and tasted, and found it very good. He
+was still fumbling about the closet, with profane
+ejaculations, and finally emerged with something in
+his hand that I at first took for a small book.
+But he unblushingly put on the table that pasteboard
+volume sometimes called the Devil&#8217;s Bible.
+&#8220;Come,&#8221; he said, &#8220;where&#8217;s the harm? Let us
+have a quiet game of Casino or California Jack,
+or something else. It is better than perishing of
+stupidity.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I demurred. I was not over-scrupulous, but I
+had sufficient of my early breeding left to have a
+qualm of conscience at the thought of playing
+cards on Sunday.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, nonsense!&#8221; said Fred, carelessly, as he
+proceeded to deal the cards for Casino. &#8220;There,
+you have an ace and little Casino right before you.
+Go ahead, old man!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I made a feeble show of protesting, but took
+up my cards, and, finding that I could capture the
+ace and little Casino, took them. From that the
+play went on; I became quite absorbed, and dismissed
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_68" id="Page_68">[68]</a></span>my scruples, when, as the sun was getting
+low, a shadow passed the window.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Great Jupiter!&#8221; I exclaimed, looking up.
+&#8220;Does that second-story piazza go all the way
+round here?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;To be sure,&#8221; answered Fred, whose back was
+to the window. &#8220;Why not? What did you
+see,&mdash;a spook?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;My mother-in-law!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;The devil!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No, Mrs. Pinkerton!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, what do you care? You are your own
+boss, I hope.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Yes, of course; but she will be terribly
+offended, and I think it would be pleasanter for
+all concerned to keep in her good graces.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Gammon! Assert your rights, be master of
+yourself, and teach the old woman her place.
+D&mdash;&mdash; me, if I would have a mother-in-law riding
+over me, or prying around to see what I was about!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, I am sure she passed the window by accident.
+She would never pry around; it isn&#8217;t her
+style; she has a fine sense of propriety, has my
+mother-in-law!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_69" id="Page_69">[69]</a></span>&#8220;Oh, yes, old Pink is the pink of propriety, no
+doubt about that!&#8221; said the rascal, laughing heartily
+at his heartless pun.</p>
+
+<p>But I couldn&#8217;t laugh. I saw plainly enough
+that I had lost more than all the ground that I had
+gained in my mother-in-law&#8217;s favor, and my task
+would be harder than ever. I had no more desire
+to play cards, and sauntered down stairs and out
+of doors as if nothing had happened. At the tea-table
+Mrs. Pinkerton was very impressive in her
+manner, but showed no direct consciousness of anything
+new. On the piazza, after tea, she was uncommonly
+affable to her daughter, and, I thought,
+a little disposed to keep Bessie from talking to
+me. The latter appeared troubled somewhat, and
+looked at me in an anxious way, as if longing to
+rush into my arms and ask me all about it and say
+how willingly she forgave me; but her mother
+kept her within the circle of her influence, and I
+sat apart, harboring unutterable thoughts and saying
+nothing. At last Mrs. Pinkerton arose, and
+said sweetly, &#8220;I wouldn&#8217;t stay out any later, dear,
+it is rather damp.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Stay with me, Bessie,&#8221; I said, &#8220;I want to
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_70" id="Page_70">[70]</a></span>speak to you. Your mother is at liberty to go in
+whenever she pleases.&#8221; It was then she gave me
+a disdainful look and swept in, and I muttered
+the wish regarding her transportation to a distant
+clime, which brought out the gentle rebuke with
+which this story opens.</p>
+
+<p>I saw no prospect of enjoying a longer stay at
+the Fairview, unless some burglary or terrible
+accident should occur to give me chance for a new
+display of my heroic qualities, and even then, I
+thought, it would be of no use, for I should spoil
+it all next day. So we determined to go home
+a week earlier than we had intended. The Marstons
+were going to Canada and Lake George, and
+wouldn&#8217;t reach home till October. Mr. Desmond
+and his niece stayed a month longer where they
+were, and that would bring them home about the
+same time. Bessie and I went home with a lack
+of that buoyant bliss with which we had travelled
+to the mountains and spent those first two weeks.
+There was no change in us, but it was all due to
+my mother-in-law.</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_71" id="Page_71">[71]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_VI" id="CHAPTER_VI"></a>CHAPTER VI.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">WHAT IS HOME WITHOUT A MOTHER-IN-LAW?</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">H</span>ome!</span> We were back from the mountains,
+and our brief wedding-journey had become
+a thing of the past. Mrs. Pinkerton&#8217;s iron-bound
+trunk had been reluctantly deposited in her bed-chamber
+by a puffing and surly hack-driver; and
+here was I, installed in the little cottage as head
+of the household, for weal or for woe. It was
+Mrs. Pinkerton&#8217;s cottage, to be sure, but I entered
+it with the determination not to live there as a
+boarder or as a guest subject to the proprietor&#8217;s
+condescending hospitality. I was able and not unwilling
+to establish a home of my own, and inasmuch
+as I refrained from doing so because of Mrs.
+Pinkerton&#8217;s desire to keep her daughter with her,
+I had the right to consider myself under no obligation
+to my mother-in-law.</p>
+
+<p>The cottage was far from being a disagreeable
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_72" id="Page_72">[72]</a></span>place in itself. It was small, but extremely neat
+and pleasant. The rooms were furnished with a
+degree of quiet taste that defied criticism. The
+hand of an accomplished housekeeper was everywhere
+made manifest, and everything had an air
+of refinement and comfort. There was no ostentatious
+furniture; the chairs were made to sit in,
+but not to put one&#8217;s boots on. The cleanliness of
+the house was terrible. One could see that no
+man had lived there since the death of the late
+Pinkerton.</p>
+
+<p>Our room was the same that had been occupied
+by Bessie since she was a school-girl in short
+frocks. It was full of Bessie&#8217;s &#8220;things,&#8221; and it
+was lucky that my effects occupied but very little
+space.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;This is jolly,&#8221; I said, as I sat down on the
+edge of the bed and pulled a cigar from my
+pocket. &#8220;How soon will supper be ready, I wonder?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>There was no response. Bessie was unpacking,&mdash;and
+such an unpacking!</p>
+
+<p>I lighted my cigar and threw myself back on
+the bed, wondering how they had got on without
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_73" id="Page_73">[73]</a></span>me at the bank. Presently in came mother-in-law
+to lend a hand at the unpacking. She did not see
+me at first, but the fragrance of my Manila soon
+reached her nostrils, and she turned.</p>
+
+<p>Such a look as she cast upon me! It almost
+took my breath away. But she did not say a word.
+&#8220;The subject is beyond her powers of speech,&#8221; I
+said to myself. &#8220;Let us hope it will be so as a
+general thing.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>However, it made me feel uncomfortable, so by
+and by I got off the bed and went down stairs.</p>
+
+<p>At the supper-table I tried to make myself as
+agreeable as possible. I talked over the trip, and
+spoke of the people we had met at the mountains;
+but I had most of the conversation to myself.
+Bessie did not seem to be in a mood to chat; Mrs.
+Pinkerton devoted herself to impaling me with
+her eyes once in a while; in a word, the mental
+atmosphere was muggy.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Desmond has travelled a great deal,&#8221; I said.
+&#8220;I was speaking of French politics the other day,
+and he gave me a long harangue on the situation.
+He was in Paris several years, when he was a
+good deal younger than he is now.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_74" id="Page_74">[74]</a></span>&#8220;Mr. Desmond is not a very old man,&#8221; said
+Mrs. Pinkerton, &#8220;but he has passed that age
+when men think they know all there is to be
+known.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I accepted this shot good-naturedly, and laughed.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;His niece is a remarkably bright girl,&#8221; I continued.
+&#8220;Don&#8217;t you think so?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I cannot say I think it either bright or proper
+for a young lady to go off alone on mountain
+excursions for half a day, and return with her
+dress torn and her hands all scratched.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, it was rather imprudent, but you know
+she said she had no intention of going so far when
+she started, and she missed her way.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I did not hear her excuses. She appeared to
+be a spoiled child, and her manners were insufferably
+offensive. I should have known she came
+from New York, even if I had not been told.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Do you think all New-Yorkers are loud?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I said no such thing. There is a class of New
+York young people who are so &#8216;loud&#8217; that respectable
+people cannot have anything to do with
+them without lowering themselves. Miss Van
+Duzen belongs to that class.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_75" id="Page_75">[75]</a></span>&#8220;You are rough on her, upon my word. I
+don&#8217;t think she&#8217;s half so bad, do you, Bessie?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I liked her very much,&#8221; said Bessie. &#8220;She
+may not be our style exactly, but I think at heart
+she is a good, true girl.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I wonder if she will call,&#8221; I said. &#8220;By the
+way, Fred Marston is coming out to see us as
+soon as he gets back to the city.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;As to that young man,&#8221; Mrs. Pinkerton
+remarked, with some show of vivacity, &#8220;he
+impressed me as being little less than disreputable.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Disreputable! I would have you understand
+that Fred Marston is one of my friends,&#8221; I exclaimed,
+growing angry, &#8220;and he is as respectable
+as the rector of St. Thomas&#8217;s Church!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Phew! Now I had done it. Mrs. Pinkerton
+was thoroughly scandalized and offended. She
+got up, and we left the table, Bessie looking troubled.
+I went into the library, and after lighting
+a cigar, sat down to read the papers. Bessie, who
+had followed me, brushed the journal out of my
+hand and seated herself on my knee.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Charlie,&#8221; she said, kissing me, and smoothing
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_76" id="Page_76">[76]</a></span>the hair away from my brow, &#8220;can&#8217;t you and
+mamma ever get along any better than this?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;A conundrum! I never guessed one, so I
+shall have to give this up. But don&#8217;t you see how
+it is, dearest? I try to be good to her, and she
+won&#8217;t meet me half-way. On the contrary, she
+tries to nag me, I think. It wasn&#8217;t my fault to-night.
+What right has she to run down my
+friends? If she don&#8217;t like them, she might leave
+them alone, and be precious sure they&#8217;d leave her
+alone. She don&#8217;t like smoking; I tried to swear
+off, tried mighty hard, but it was no use. You
+see&mdash;&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;It wasn&#8217;t quite necessary for you to make that
+remark about the Rev. Dr. McCanon, was it,
+Charlie?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, no; I&#8217;m sorry, but she provoked me to
+it. I&#8217;ll apologize.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;And then, Charlie, you will try to be a little
+more patient with mamma, won&#8217;t you?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Yes, I do try, but the trouble is that she don&#8217;t
+like me. Must I keep my mouth shut, throw
+away my cigars, bounce all my friends, and sit up
+with my arms folded?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_77" id="Page_77">[77]</a></span>&#8220;Oh, no, dear. Be good to her, and be patient;
+it will all come around right in time.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>That was Bessie&#8217;s way of lightening present
+troubles,&mdash;&#8220;It will all come around right in
+time.&#8221; Blessed hope! &#8220;Man never is, but
+always to be blest.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>My duties now kept me at the bank nearly all
+day, and for a few weeks affairs went on at home
+very smoothly. At table Mrs. Pinkerton maintained
+a sphinx-like silence, and I directed my
+conversation to Bessie. When the old lady
+opened her mouth, it was to snub me. The snub
+direct, the snub indirect, the snub implied, and
+the snub far-fetched,&mdash;I submitted to all with a
+cheerful spirit, and not a hasty retort escaped me.</p>
+
+<p>At Bessie&#8217;s request, I now smoked only in the
+library, or in our own room. I bought a highly
+ornamental Japanese affair, of curious workmanship,
+as a receptacle for cigar-ashes. Altogether,
+I behaved like a good boy.</p>
+
+<p>One evening Marston dropped in. When his
+card was brought up stairs, I handed it over to
+Bessie, and hurried to the library.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;How are you, old man?&#8221; he said, or, rather,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_78" id="Page_78">[78]</a></span>shouted. &#8220;How do you like it, as far as you&#8217;ve
+got?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Tip-top. I&#8217;m glad to see you. When did
+you get back?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Last Saturday, and mighty glad to get back
+to a live place, too. Smoke?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Thank you. Bessie will be down in a minute.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;How&#8217;s old Pink?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;S-s-h! She&#8217;s all right. Don&#8217;t speak so confoundedly
+loud.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Ha, ha! I see how it is. By and by you
+won&#8217;t dare say your soul&#8217;s your own. I pity you,
+Charlie, upon my word I do. Ned Tupney was
+married a few days ago, did you know it? and
+he&#8217;s got a devil of a mother-in-law on his hands,
+a regular roarer&mdash;&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Here comes my wife,&#8221; I broke in. &#8220;For
+Heaven&#8217;s sake, change the subject. Talk about
+roses!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Bessie entered and exchanged a friendly greeting
+with Fred.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I was telling Charlie about some wonderful
+roses I saw at Primton&#8217;s green-house,&#8221; said the
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_79" id="Page_79">[79]</a></span>unabashed visitor, and he forthwith laid aside his
+cigar&mdash;on the tablecloth!&mdash;and launched into a
+glowing description of the imaginary flowers.</p>
+
+<p>Before he had finished, Mrs. Pinkerton entered
+much to my surprise. She bowed in a stately
+manner, inquired formally as to the state of
+Fred&#8217;s health, and as she took a seat I saw her
+glance take in that cigar.</p>
+
+<p>Fred could talk exceedingly well when he was
+so disposed, and he entertained us excellently, I
+thought. He had seen a good deal of the world,
+was a close observer, and had the faculty of chatting
+in a fascinating way about subjects that would
+usually be called commonplace. He was pleased
+with the aspect of the cottage, and complimented
+it gracefully.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Love in a cottage,&#8221; he sighed, casting a quick
+glance around the room,&mdash;&#8220;well, it isn&#8217;t so bad
+after all, with plenty of books, a pleasant garden,
+sunny rooms, a pretty view, and a mother-in-law
+to look after a fellow and keep him straight.&#8221; And
+the wretch looked at Mrs. Pinkerton, and laughed
+in a sociable way.</p>
+
+<p>I promptly called his attention to a beautiful
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_80" id="Page_80">[80]</a></span>edition of Thackeray&#8217;s works in the bookcase, a
+recent purchase.</p>
+
+<p>In the course of a half-hour&#8217;s call, Fred managed
+to introduce the dangerous topic at least a
+half-dozen times, and each time I was compelled
+to choke him off by ramming some other subject
+down his throat willy-nilly.</p>
+
+<p>Finally he rose to go. I accompanied him to
+the front door.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Sociable creature, old Pink, eh?&#8221; he said.
+&#8220;Doesn&#8217;t love me too well. Is she always as festive
+and amusing as to-night?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Hold on a minute,&#8221; was my reply. I ran back
+and got my hat and cane, and accompanied him
+toward the railroad station.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;See here, Fred,&#8221; I said, &#8220;your intentions are
+good, but I wish you would quit talking about
+Mrs. Pinkerton. I am doing my best to live
+peaceably and comfortably in the same house with
+her, and you don&#8217;t help me a bit with your gabble.
+She is a very worthy woman, and not half
+so stupid as you imagine. I admit that we don&#8217;t
+get along together quite as I could wish, but I&#8217;m
+trying to please my wife by being as good a son
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_81" id="Page_81">[81]</a></span>as I can be to her mother. What&#8217;s the use of
+trying to rile up our little puddle?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, all right!&#8221; he rejoined. &#8220;If you prefer
+your puddle should be stagnant&mdash;admirable
+metaphor, by the way&mdash;it shall be as you wish.
+Only I hate to see the way things are going with
+you, and I&#8217;m bound to tell you so. You are
+losing your spirit, tying your hands, and throwing
+all your manly independence to the winds.
+If you live two years with that irreproachable
+mummy, you won&#8217;t be worth knowing. Do you
+dare go into town with me and have a game of
+billiards?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I went. We had several games. I got home
+about midnight. The next morning, at the breakfast-table,
+Mrs. Pinkerton said dryly,&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Your friend Marston pities you, doesn&#8217;t
+he?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I don&#8217;t know; if he does, he wastes his emotions,&#8221;
+I replied.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I am glad you think so. He takes a good
+deal of interest in your welfare, and I suppose he
+could be prevailed upon to give you wise advice
+in case of need.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_82" id="Page_82">[82]</a></span>&#8220;I dare say. Fred is a good fellow, and advice
+is as cheap as dirt.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;And pity?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Pity! Why do you think Fred pities me?
+Why should he pity me?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Your question is hypocritical, because you
+know very well that he thinks you are a victim,&mdash;a
+victim of a terrible mother-in-law.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>It was the first time she had ever spoken out so
+openly. I said,&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;We will leave it to Bessie. Bessie, do I look
+like a victim?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No,&#8221; said Bessie, &#8220;but you are both the queerest
+puzzles! Mamma is always her dearest self when
+you are away, Charlie. You don&#8217;t know each other
+at all yet. When you are together you are both
+horrid, and when you are apart you are both lovely.
+And yet I don&#8217;t know why it should be so; there
+is no quarrel between you&mdash;and&mdash;and&mdash;&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>And Bessie began to cry. I got up.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No, there&#8217;s no quarrel between us,&#8221; I said;
+&#8220;but perhaps a straight-out row would be better
+than forever to be eating our own vitals with suppressed
+rancor.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_83" id="Page_83">[83]</a></span>Mrs. Pinkerton made as if she would go around
+to where Bessie sat, to condole with her, without
+noticing my remark.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No, don&#8217;t trouble yourself,&#8221; I cried. &#8220;It&#8217;s my
+place to comfort my wife.&#8221; And I took Bessie in
+my arms tenderly, and kissed her tear-stained
+cheek almost fiercely.</p>
+
+<p>This theatrical demonstration caused my mother-in-law
+to sweep out of the room promptly, with
+her temper as nearly ruffled as I had ever seen it.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;O Charlie!&#8221; whimpered my poor little wife
+despairingly, &#8220;what shall I do? It&#8217;s awful to
+have you and mamma this way!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>And now it was my turn to say, &#8220;Cheer up, my
+love! It will all come around right in time.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>But my <i>arri&egrave;re pens&eacute;e</i> was, &#8220;Would that that
+burglar had bagged the old iceberg, and carried
+her off to her native Nova Zembla!&#8221;</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_84" id="Page_84">[84]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_VII" id="CHAPTER_VII"></a>CHAPTER VII.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">MISS VAN&#8217;S PARTY AND ANOTHER UNPLEASANTNESS.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">O</span>ne</span> day in the early fall, Mrs. Pinkerton
+received a letter postmarked at Paris, which
+seemed to throw her into a state of extraordinary
+excitement. I knew her well enough to be certain
+that she would not tell me the news, but that
+I should hear it later through Bessie. Such was
+the case. When I came home towards evening
+and went up stairs to prepare for supper, Bessie,
+who was seated in our room, said in a joyful
+tone,&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;George is coming home next month!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;That&#8217;s good,&#8221; I said; and the more I thought
+of it the better it seemed. A new element would
+be infused into our home life with his advent,
+and I confidently believed that the widow&#8217;s society
+would be vastly more tolerable when he was
+among us. George had been so long in Paris that
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_85" id="Page_85">[85]</a></span>he had become a veritable Parisian. That he
+would bring along with him a large amount of Paris
+sunshine and vivacity to enliven the atmosphere of
+our little circle, I felt certain.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Is he coming to stay?&#8221; I asked.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;He don&#8217;t know. He says he never makes any
+plans for six months ahead. It will depend upon
+circumstances.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, that&#8217;s Parisian. I&#8217;m very glad he&#8217;s
+coming, and I hope circumstances will keep him
+here. Isn&#8217;t old Dr. Jones pretty nearly dead?
+Seems to me George could take his practice.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Now, Charlie!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;It&#8217;s all right, puss; doctors must die as well
+as their patients.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I broached the subject to mother-in-law at the
+supper-table, and&mdash;<i>mirabile dictu!</i>&mdash;she agreed
+with me that we must keep George with us when
+we got him.</p>
+
+<p>In November George arrived. He didn&#8217;t telegraph
+from New York, but came right on by a
+night train, and, walking into the house while we
+were at breakfast, took us by surprise.</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Pinkerton taken by surprise was a funny
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_86" id="Page_86">[86]</a></span>phenomenon, and I&#8217;m afraid propriety received a
+pretty smart blow when she threw her napkin into
+a plate of buckwheat cakes, dropped her eye-glasses,
+and rushed to meet the long-lost prodigal.</p>
+
+<p>As for George, he brought such a gale into the
+house with him&mdash;there are plenty of them on the
+Atlantic in November&mdash;that everything seemed
+metamorphosed. He laughed and shouted, and
+hugged first one of us and then another, and
+finally sat down and ate breakfast enough for six
+Frenchmen, every minute ripping out some wicked
+little French oath and winking at his mother with
+the utmost complacency. Never since I had
+become an inmate of the cottage had we enjoyed
+a meal so much as that one. There was an
+<i>abandon</i>, an <i>insouciance</i>, an <i>esprit</i>, a <i>je-ne-sais-quoi</i>
+about this young frog-eater that thoroughly
+carried away the whole party, including even Mrs.
+Pinkerton.</p>
+
+<p>When George had eaten everything he could
+find on the table, he lighted a cigarette,&mdash;right
+there in the dining-room, too, and under his
+mother&#8217;s eyes,&mdash;and we had a good, long, jolly
+talk together, Bessie sitting between us and feasting
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_87" id="Page_87">[87]</a></span>her eyes on her brother&#8217;s comeliness. He
+certainly was handsome.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I have no plans,&#8221; he said, &#8220;except to loaf here
+awhile and wait for an opening.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;A French Micawber,&#8221; said I. &#8220;And I suppose
+you know all about medicine and surgery?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I have learned when not to give medicine, I
+believe, and so, I think, I can save lots of lives.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>A few days after George&#8217;s arrival we received
+a call from the Watsons. I had never had the
+pleasure of meeting the Watsons, but I had had
+the Watsons held up before me as examples of the
+right sort of style so many times, that I felt already
+well acquainted with them.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. Watson was a very retiring, quiet little
+man, awed into obscurity by his wife. After a
+long and persistent effort to interest him in conversation,
+I was compelled to give it up, and to
+leave him smiling blankly, with his gaze directed
+toward the Argand burner.</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Watson was immense in every sense of
+the word. Her moral and mental dimensions
+were awe-inspiring; and she delivered what I afterwards
+found, on reflection, to be very commonplace
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_88" id="Page_88">[88]</a></span>utterances in a style in which unction,
+dogmatism, self-satisfaction, and finality were predominant.
+Once, when she had brought forth an
+unusually imposing sentence, her husband fairly
+smacked his lips.</p>
+
+<p>The Watsons had no children. They were
+among the most prominent attendants of St.
+Thomas&#8217;s, and the old gentleman was reputed to
+be worth about a million.</p>
+
+<p>George came in while the call was in progress,
+and after greeting the Watsons, he turned to Mrs.
+W., and uttered one of the most polished, delicate,
+pleasing little compliments it has ever been
+my fortune to hear uttered. Then he quietly withdrew
+into the background.</p>
+
+<p>Just then some more callers were announced,
+and what was my surprise to see Mr. Desmond
+and Miss Van Duzen enter. The former was as
+resplendent as to his watch-chain as ever, and his
+niece looked charming. Introductions all round
+followed, and the company broke up into groups.</p>
+
+<p>George took a seat near Miss Van, and a brisk fire
+of conversation was soon under way between them,
+varied by frequent bursts of friendly laughter.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_89" id="Page_89">[89]</a></span>Mr. Desmond soon drew out Mr. Watson, and
+their talk was on stocks, bonds, and the like.</p>
+
+<p>After Mrs. Watson had proved her theory of
+the laws of the universe, and had almost intoxicated
+my worthy mother-in-law with her glittering
+rhetoric, the Watsons took their departure. Before
+the others followed their example, Miss Van
+extended an informal invitation to us to attend a
+&#8220;social gathering&#8221; at her uncle&#8217;s residence the
+following Wednesday evening.</p>
+
+<p>We went, of course, Mrs. Pinkerton, George,
+Bessie, and I. It was a pleasant party, and it
+could not have been otherwise with Miss Van as
+the hostess. There was a little dancing,&mdash;not
+enough to entitle it to be called a dancing-party;
+a little card-playing,&mdash;not enough to make it a
+card-party; and there was a vast amount of bright
+and pleasant conversation, but still one could not
+name it a <i>converzatione</i>. The company was remarkably
+good, and Miss Van&#8217;s management,
+although imperceptible, was so skilful that her
+guests found themselves at their ease, and enjoying
+themselves, without knowing that their pleasure
+was more than half due to her <i>finesse</i>.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_90" id="Page_90">[90]</a></span>George was quite a lion, and I envied his easy
+tact, his unconscious grace of manner, and his
+faculty of saying bright things without effort. He
+and Miss Van got on famously together, and she
+found him an efficient and trustworthy aid in her
+capacity as hostess.</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Pinkerton made a lovely wall-flower, and
+I could not refrain from a wicked chuckle when I
+saw her sitting on a sofa, exchanging commonplaces
+with a puffing dowager. Presently, however,
+I noticed that she had gone, and I found
+that Mr. Desmond had been kind enough to
+relieve me from the onerous duty of taking her
+down to supper.</p>
+
+<p>I wish I had a printed bill of fare of that supper,
+for even George, fresh from V&eacute;four&#8217;s and the
+Trois Fr&egrave;res Proven&ccedil;aux, acknowledged that it
+was sublime, magnificent, perfect. We men folks,
+in fact, talked so much about it afterwards, that
+Bessie rebuked us by remarking that &#8220;men didn&#8217;t
+care about anything so much as eating.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>As Fred Marston remarked to me, while helping
+himself a third time to the salad, &#8220;It&#8217;s a stunning
+old lay-out, isn&#8217;t it!&#8221; His wife was there,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_91" id="Page_91">[91]</a></span>dressed &#8220;to kill,&#8221; as he himself said, and dancing
+with every gentleman she could decoy into asking
+her.</p>
+
+<p>After we had come up from the supper-room,
+Fred Marston pulled me into a corner, and inflicted
+on me a volley of stinging observations
+about the people in the room. George, Bessie,
+Mrs. Pinkerton, and Miss Van were, I supposed,
+in one of the other rooms; I had lost sight of
+them.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Old Jenks lost a cool hundred thousand fighting
+the tiger at Saratoga, this last summer,&#8221; said
+Fred. &#8220;I had it from a man who backed him.
+Do you know that young widow talking with him
+near the end of the piano? No? Why, that&#8217;s
+Mrs. Delascelles, and a devil of a little piece she
+is,&mdash;twice divorced and once widowed, and she
+isn&#8217;t a day over twenty-five. You ought to know
+her. By the way, that brother of yours is a
+whole team, with a bull-pup under the wagon.
+Does he let old Pink boss him around as she does
+you?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;It&#8217;s a fine night,&#8221; I said.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Delightful! I say, Charlie, it must be a terrible
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_92" id="Page_92">[92]</a></span>bore to lug the old woman around to all these
+shindigs with you, hey?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;What do you think about the State election?&#8221;
+I demanded.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;The Republicans have got a dead sure thing,
+I&#8217;ll lay you a V. She has bulldozed you till you
+don&#8217;t dare open your head, my boy. Yours is
+one of the saddest and most malignant cases of
+mother-in-law I ever struck.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Fred,&#8221; I said, in hopes of bringing his tirade
+to an end, &#8220;your friendship is slightly oppressive.
+Confine your attentions to your own grievances.
+I will take care of mine.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Ah! at last you acknowledge that you have
+one. Confess, now, that old Pink is a confounded
+nuisance!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, then, yes, she is! Does that satisfy
+you, scandal-monger? Now, for Heaven&#8217;s sake,
+shut up!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I heard a brisk rustling of silk just at my left
+and a little back of where I sat, and some one
+passed toward the front parlor.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;By Jove!&#8221; ejaculated Fred, looking intently.
+&#8220;It&#8217;s old Pink herself, and I hope she got the
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_93" id="Page_93">[93]</a></span>benefit of what we said about her. I had no
+idea she was sitting near us.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;What <i>we</i> said about her!&#8221; I repeated. &#8220;I
+didn&#8217;t say anything about her.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Yes, you did. Ha, ha! You said she was a
+confounded nuisance!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I shuddered.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, well, brace up! Perhaps she didn&#8217;t hear
+that impious remark,&#8221; said Fred, chuckling maliciously.
+&#8220;Or if she did, perhaps she&#8217;ll let you
+off easy: only a few hours in the dark closet,
+or bread and water for a day or two.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Confound your mischief-making tongue!&#8221; I
+growled. &#8220;Here comes Miss Van Duzen to bid
+you quit spreading scandal about her guests.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Miss Van Duzen, on the contrary, only wished
+Mr. Marston to secure a partner for the Lanciers,
+which he promptly did.</p>
+
+<p>I sat brooding while the dancing went on, and
+was somewhat astonished, when it was over, to
+see George making for my corner.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;How&#8217;s this?&#8221; he said. &#8220;Didn&#8217;t you go home
+with them?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;With them? What! You don&#8217;t mean to say&mdash;&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_94" id="Page_94">[94]</a></span>&#8220;But I do, though! Bessie and mother made
+their adieux half an hour ago, and I thought of
+course you had gone home with them, as nothing
+was said to me. This is a pretty go! Bessie
+must have been ill.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Nonsense!&#8221; I exclaimed. &#8220;I should have
+known if that was the case. Where&#8217;s Miss Van?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I saw her. She thought it was odd, but supposed
+you had gone with them. What could have
+started them off in that fashion?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, well, don&#8217;t let&#8217;s stand here talking.
+Come on.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>We did not stop for ceremony. Rushing up
+stairs, we donned our hats and coats, and made
+our way out to the sidewalk without losing any
+time. I hailed a carriage, and we drove rapidly
+out of town. It was about half past one o&#8217;clock
+when we arrived home. There were lights in our
+room and in Mrs. Pinkerton&#8217;s chamber. George
+followed me up stairs, and I tapped at the door of
+our room.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Is it you, Charlie?&#8221; said Bessie&#8217;s voice.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Yes,&mdash;and George.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>She opened the door. It was evidently not
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_95" id="Page_95">[95]</a></span>long since their arrival home, for she had not
+begun to undress.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Explain, for our benefit, the new method of
+leaving a party,&#8221; said George, &#8220;and why it was
+deemed necessary to give us a scare in inaugurating
+the same.&#8221; He threw himself into an easy-chair.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Perhaps Mr. Travers is better able to tell you
+why mother should have left in the way she did,&#8221;
+said Bessie, trying to make her speech sound sarcastic
+and cutting, but finding it a difficult job,
+with her breath coming and going so quickly.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;The deuce he is!&#8221; roared George. &#8220;Come,
+Charlie, what have you been up to? I must get it
+out of some of you.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I am utterly unable to tell you why your
+mother should have left in the way she did,&#8221; was
+all I could find to say.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Sapristi! This is getting mysterious and
+blood-curdling. The latest <i>feuilleton</i> is nothing to
+it. Must I go to bed without knowing the cause
+of this escapade? Well, so be it. But let me
+tell you, young woman, that it wasn&#8217;t the thing
+to do. If you find your husband flirting with
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_96" id="Page_96">[96]</a></span>some siren, you must lead him off by the ear next
+time, but don&#8217;t sulk. Good night.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>George walked out and shut the door after him.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;See here, Bessie,&#8221; I said kindly, &#8220;don&#8217;t cry,
+because I want to talk sensibly with you.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>She was sobbing now in good earnest.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I want you to tell me what your mother said
+to you about me.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>She couldn&#8217;t talk just then, poor little woman!
+But when she had had her cry partly out, she
+told me.</p>
+
+<p>Her mother had not told her a word of what
+had passed between Fred Marston and me! The
+outraged dignity of the widow would not admit of
+an explicit account of the unspeakable insult she
+had received. She had simply given Bessie to
+understand that I had uttered some unpardonable,
+infamous slander, and had hustled the poor girl
+breathlessly into a cab and away, before she fairly
+realized what had happened.</p>
+
+<p>I then told Bessie what our conversation had
+been, and left her to judge for herself. I had not
+the heart to scold her for her part in the French
+leave-taking, though it made me feel miserable to
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_97" id="Page_97">[97]</a></span>think how few episodes of such a sort might bring
+about endless misunderstandings and heart-aches.</p>
+
+<p>Of course more or less talk was caused by the
+mysterious manner of our several departures from
+Miss Van&#8217;s party; and, thanks to Fred Marston
+and his wife and similar rattle-pates, it became
+generally known that there was a skeleton in the
+Pinkerton closet.</p>
+
+<p>Miss Van soon heard how it came about, and
+nothing could have afforded a more complete
+proof of her refinement of character than the delicacy
+and tact with which she ignored the whole
+affair.</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_98" id="Page_98">[98]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_VIII" id="CHAPTER_VIII"></a>CHAPTER VIII.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">ANOTHER CHARLIE IN THE FIELD.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">T</span>he</span> winter, with its petty trials and contentions,
+had gone by; spring, with its bloom and
+fragrance, was far advanced; and already another
+summer, with its possible pleasures and recreations,
+was close upon us. Before it had fairly set
+in, however, an event of extraordinary importance
+was to occur in our little household. There had
+been premonitions of it for some time, which had
+a tendency to soften and soothe all asperities,
+and cause a rather sober and subdued air to pervade
+the little cottage, and now there were active
+preparations going on. Of course, the widow was
+gradually assuming the management of the whole
+affair, and it was a matter in which I could hardly
+venture to dispute her right. Her experience and
+knowledge were certainly superior to mine, and it
+was an affair in which these qualities were very
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_99" id="Page_99">[99]</a></span>important. In fact, I seemed to be counted out
+altogether in the preparations, as if it was something
+in the nature of a surprise party in my
+honor. Mrs. Pinkerton had an air of mysterious
+and exclusive knowledge concerning the grand
+event. Miss Van, who had come to have confidential
+relations with Bessie, of the most intimate
+kind, notwithstanding the mother&#8217;s objections,
+knew all about it, but had a queer way of appearing
+unconscious of anything unusual. There
+seemed to be a general consent to a shallow pretence
+that I was in utter and hopeless ignorance.
+It annoyed me a little, as I flattered myself that I
+knew quite as much about what was coming as any
+of them, and I thought it silly to make believe I
+didn&#8217;t, and to ignore my interest in the affair.
+Bessie had no secrets from me, of course, and our
+understanding was complete, but one might have
+thought from appearances that we had less concern
+in the matter than anybody else.</p>
+
+<p>As the auspicious time drew near, the goings-on
+increased in mystery and the widow&#8217;s control
+grew more and more complete. Bessie showed
+me one day a wardrobe that amused me immensely.
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_100" id="Page_100">[100]</a></span>It was quite astonishing in its extent
+and variety, but so liliputian in the dimensions of
+the separate garments as to seem ridiculous to
+me.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Aren&#8217;t they cunning?&#8221; said the dear girl, holding
+up one after another of the various articles of
+raiment. Then she showed me a basket, marvellously
+constructed, with a mere skeleton of wicker-work
+and coverings of pink silk and fine lace, and
+furnished with toilet appliances that seemed to
+belong to a fairy; and finally, removing a big quilt
+that had excited my curiosity, she showed me the
+most startling object of all,&mdash;a cradle! I had seen
+such things before and felt no particular thrill, but
+this had a strange effect upon me. I didn&#8217;t stop
+to inquire how these things had all been smuggled
+into the house without my knowledge or consent,
+but kissed my little wife fondly, and went down
+stairs in a musing and pensive mood.</p>
+
+<p>The next day a decree of virtual exile was pronounced
+upon me. My mother-in-law thought
+perhaps it would be better if I would occupy
+another room in the house for a time, and let her
+share Bessie&#8217;s chamber. The poor, dear girl
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_101" id="Page_101">[101]</a></span>might need her care at any time, and the widow
+looked at me as much as to say, &#8220;You cannot be
+expected to know anything about these matters,
+and have nothing to do but obey my directions.&#8221;
+I consented without a murmur or the least show
+of resistance, for I admitted everything that could
+possibly be said, and lost all my spirit of independence
+in view of the impressive event that was
+coming. So I meekly took to the attic, and put
+up with the most forlorn and desolate quarters.
+One or two mornings after, I was aroused at an
+inhuman hour, and ordered in the most imperative
+tones to call in Dr. Lyman as quickly as possible,
+and haste after Mrs. Sweet. I hurried into my
+clothes in the utmost agitation, raced down the
+street in a manner that led a watchful policeman
+to stop me and inquire my business, rung up the
+doctor with the most unbecoming violence, and
+delivered my errand up a speaking-tube, in answer
+to his muffled, &#8220;What&#8217;s wanted?&#8221; Then I
+rushed to the neighboring stable, and got up the
+sleepy hostler with as much vehemence in my
+manner as if he were in danger of being burned
+to death, and induced him to harness a team,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_102" id="Page_102">[102]</a></span>in what I considered about twice the necessary
+length of time; drove three miles in the morning
+twilight for Mrs. Sweet, a motherly old maid in
+the nursing business, who had officiated at Bessie&#8217;s
+own <i>d&eacute;but</i> upon the stage of life. When I
+had got back and returned the team to the stable,
+and was walking about the lower rooms in a restless
+manner, feeling as if I had suddenly become
+a hopeless outcast, the doctor came down stairs,
+and said, with amazing calmness, as though it
+was the most commonplace thing in the world,&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Getting on nicely. Fine boy, sir! Mrs. Travers
+is quite comfortable. Will look in again in
+the course of the morning.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Then I was left alone again, an outcast and a
+wanderer in my own home. All the life was up
+stairs, including the wee bit of new life that had
+come to venture upon the perils and vicissitudes
+of the great world. It was two hours, but it
+seemed a month, before any one relieved my solitude,
+and then it was at Bessie&#8217;s interposition&mdash;in
+fact, a command that she had to insist upon until
+her mother was afraid of her getting excited&mdash;that
+I was admitted to behold the mysteries above.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[103]</a></span>Well, it is nobody&#8217;s business about the particulars
+of that chamber. It was too sacred for
+description; but there was the tiny, quivering,
+red new-comer, already dressed in some of the
+dainty liliputian garments, and very much astonished
+and not altogether pleased at the effect.
+Bessie was proud and happy, the nurse, moving
+about silently, knew just what to do and how to do
+it, and the mother-in-law held supreme command.
+She was grand and severe, and evidently her wishes
+had been disregarded in respect to the sex of
+her grandchild. She feared the consequences of
+another Charlie launched into a world already too
+degenerate, and she had hoped for an addition to
+the superior sex. But Bessie and I were mightily
+pleased that it was a boy.</p>
+
+<p>There was little to be said then, but in a few
+days the restraint began to be relaxed, and discussions
+arose about what had become the most important
+member of the household. Even the
+widow must be content with the second place
+now, but I began to have misgivings lest my
+position had been permanently fixed as the third.
+In my secret mind, however, I determined to
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[104]</a></span>assert my rights as soon as Bessie was strong
+again, and reduce my mother-in-law to the position
+in which she belonged. I had put off doing it too
+long, and advantage might be taken of the present
+juncture of affairs to strengthen her claim to
+supremacy, and it really wouldn&#8217;t do to delay
+much longer.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I think he looks just like Charlie,&#8221; said Bessie
+to Miss Van, the first time the latter called after
+the great event.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, I don&#8217;t know,&#8221; was the reply. &#8220;It
+seems to me he has his papa&#8217;s dark eyes, but I
+can&#8217;t see any other resemblance.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, I do!&#8221; Bessie replied with spirit. &#8220;Why,
+it is just his forehead and mouth, and his hair will
+be just the same beautiful brown when he grows
+up.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>The old lady was looking on reproachfully, and
+finally said, &#8220;Bessie, my dear, that child looks
+precisely like your own family. George at his
+age was just such an infant; you couldn&#8217;t tell
+them apart.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>George entered the room at that moment, and
+with his boisterous laugh said, &#8220;You don&#8217;t mean
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[105]</a></span>to say that I was ever such a little, soft, ridiculous
+lump of humanity as that, do you?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;As like as two peas,&#8221; was the reply of his
+mother.</p>
+
+<p>For my part I kept out of the discussion, for I
+must confess I could see no resemblance between
+the precious baby and any other mortal creature,
+except another baby of the same age. I thought
+they looked pretty much all alike, and was not
+prepared to deny that it was the exact counterpart
+of anybody at that particular stage of development.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I tell you what, Bess,&#8221; said George, after the
+debate had fully subsided, &#8220;you must name that
+little chap for me.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, no,&#8221; replied the proud mother, &#8220;that is
+all settled; his name is Charlie.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Nothing had been said on the subject before,
+and I was a little startled at Bessie&#8217;s positive manner,
+for I thought even this matter would not be
+free from her mother&#8217;s dictation. The old lady
+seemed surprised and vexed. &#8220;George is a much
+better name, I think,&#8221; she said very quietly, keeping
+down her vexation, &#8220;but I thought perhaps
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[106]</a></span>you might remember your dear father in this
+matter. His name, you know, was Benjamin.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Yes, I know,&#8221; said Bessie, very firmly, &#8220;but I
+think there is one with a still higher claim, and
+the child&#8217;s name is Charles.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Good for you, little girl!&#8221; I thought, but I
+said nothing. Within me I felt a gleeful satisfaction
+at Bessie&#8217;s spirit, which showed that if it ever
+came to a sharp contest with her mother, nothing
+could keep her from holding her own place by
+her husband&#8217;s side. All my misgivings about
+her possible estrangement by her mother&#8217;s influence
+vanished, and I saw that the new tie
+between us would be stronger than any earthly
+power.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well,&#8221; said George abruptly, after a pause, &#8220;I
+wouldn&#8217;t be so disobliging about a little thing like
+that.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Ah! you wait until you can afford the opportunity
+of furnishing names, and see what you will
+do,&#8221; I said jokingly. My joke was not generally
+appreciated. The widow gave me a look a little
+short of savage. Bessie suppressed a smile, in
+order to give me a reproof with her eyes, and
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[107]</a></span>Miss Van just then thought of something wholly
+irrelevant to say, as if she had not noticed my
+remark at all. On the whole, I was made to feel
+that it was a disgraceful failure.</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_108" id="Page_108">[108]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_IX" id="CHAPTER_IX"></a>CHAPTER IX.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">THE SHADOW ON OUR LIFE.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">A</span>nother</span> summer with all its glory was upon
+us. It was nearly a year since we were married,
+and I was beginning to feel the dignity of
+a family man. As Bessie regained her strength
+and bloom, she seemed to have a matronly grace
+and self-command quite new to her. As I looked
+back over our married life I saw no dark shadows,
+no coldness between us two, no misunderstandings
+that need occasion regret, but somehow
+it seemed as though that year had not been so
+bright and happy as it ought to have been. We
+had lived under an irksome restraint that was
+depressing. I had felt it more than Bessie, for
+she had been accustomed to submit to her mother,
+and did not chafe, but she plainly saw that my
+life had not that blithesomeness that would have
+been natural to me, and which she would have
+been glad to give it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_109" id="Page_109">[109]</a></span>It was the presence and influence of the mother-in-law
+that gave a chill to my home life, and yet I
+could accuse the good woman of no special offence.
+She was no vulgar meddler, and never wished or
+intended to mar our domestic felicity. She had
+managed to keep control of our household arrangements
+and we had passively acquiesced, but I felt
+that it would be better if Bessie would take command
+and cater more to our own desires. We
+could then have things our own way, and her
+position would be more becoming as the lady of
+the house. She began to regard it in the same
+light herself. Our social life, too, had been restrained
+and restricted. I was very fond of having
+my friends about me, and wished them to come
+in for the evening or to dinner or to pass a Sunday
+afternoon in our little bower, as often as they
+could find it agreeable. Mrs. Pinkerton made no
+open objections, but I knew the company of my
+friends was not congenial to her, and so was reluctant
+and backward in my invitations to them.
+Besides, they were apt to be chilled and disconcerted
+by the widow&#8217;s stately presence and rebuking
+ways, and were disinclined to make themselves
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_110" id="Page_110">[110]</a></span>quite at home with us. Fred Marston and
+his wife had been quite driven away. Mrs. Pinkerton
+had declined to speak to the latter, and
+had told the former in plain terms that he used
+language of which no gentleman would be guilty.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;By thunder!&#8221; roared the impulsive fellow, &#8220;I&#8217;ll
+have you to understand that my wife and I are
+just as good as you, with your cursed airs of superiority!&#8221;
+and he stormed out of doors, and incontinently
+returned to town. When I met him afterwards
+he condescendingly declared that he didn&#8217;t
+blame me, except that I ought to be a man and not
+allow &#8220;old Pink&#8221; to insult my guests. I did not
+particularly regret his discontinuing his visits, for,
+to tell the truth, I did not like his manners, and
+he had drifted into a circle and among associates
+not at all to my taste, but it galled me to have
+any one whom I chose to entertain driven out of
+my house.</p>
+
+<p>I think nothing saved our charming friend, Miss
+Van Duzen, to whom we had both become greatly
+attached, from being gracefully snubbed and insulted,
+except the presence of her uncle, whenever
+she came out to visit us in the evening. Mr. Desmond&#8217;s
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_111" id="Page_111">[111]</a></span>indisputable social rank, his unimpeachable
+demeanor as a gentleman, and the dignity and
+impressiveness of his presence, though it could by
+no means overawe my mother-in-law, made it impossible
+even for her to give him an affront.
+Besides, she seemed to have a real respect for
+that fine old gentleman. She would doubtless
+have thought better of him if he had been a regular
+attendant at St. Thomas&#8217;s Church, but she could
+not learn that he was very constant at any sanctuary.
+His views were decidedly what are called
+liberal, and yet he was very considerate of the religious
+beliefs and practices of others, and would
+cheerfully acknowledge the worthy aims and good
+works of all the different Christian denominations.
+He seemed to understand why other persons should
+choose to join one or another, while he preferred
+to stand aloof, have his own ways of thinking, and
+do whatever good he might in his own way. He
+had large business interests and great wealth, and
+though he maintained his mansion in the city in
+great elegance, his family expenses were comparatively
+small, and he was reputed to make it up
+fully by supporting more than one poor family in
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_112" id="Page_112">[112]</a></span>a quiet way. He was liberal in his conduct as
+well as his belief, and his character and habits
+were above the reproach of the severest critic.
+Hence it was that the widow was forced to respect
+at least this one of our visitors, and to treat his
+niece with common civility, though cordiality was
+out of the question.</p>
+
+<p>In fact, we owed to Mr. Desmond not a little
+for what relief we obtained in our social life
+from the chilling restraints of the mother-in-law&#8217;s
+presence. He seemed to take a real pleasure in
+coming out to our little snuggery. His stately
+establishment in town could not be very home-like.
+His niece presided over it with great skill,
+and saw that every wish or taste of his was gratified.
+She could always entertain him with her
+sprightly wit, and their social occasions were
+among the most elegant in the city. He had his
+club to go to, which furnished every means that
+ingenuity and lavish resources could contrive to
+minister to the pleasures of man. And yet, there
+was wanting to his life that element that was
+the essence of home. He had longed for it when
+he was young, and had provided for it in his
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_113" id="Page_113">[113]</a></span>household; but the wife of his youth had been
+called from him early, and he had vainly tried to
+fill all his life with business, with silent works of
+charity, with elegance and profusion in his house,
+with his clubs, his studies, and his travels; but
+still there was a void, and when he came to visit
+us, he seemed to find something akin to the home
+feeling in our little circle. So he came far oftener
+than was to be expected of one in his position.
+Clara was his excuse, but it was plain to see that
+he liked to come on his own account, and he made
+himself very agreeable to us all; and when he
+came, we noticed the chilling influence of Mrs.
+Pinkerton much less than when he was not there.</p>
+
+<p>Sometimes we had a whist party. It was
+generally Bessie and I against Clara and George,
+but the widow had no objection to whist and was
+occasionally induced to take a hand, while Mr.
+Desmond was quite fond of the game and was a
+consummate player. When we young people
+made up the set, Mr. Desmond would converse
+with the widow, for though reticent where politeness
+did not call upon him to talk, he was incapable
+of the rudeness of sitting silent with one
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_114" id="Page_114">[114]</a></span>other person, or in a small party of intimate
+friends; and these conversations, showing his
+wide information on all manner of subjects, his
+sympathy with all charitable movements, and his
+tolerant regard even for the widow&#8217;s pet ideas
+on church and society, evidently increased her
+respect for him.</p>
+
+<p>George must not be forgotten as a member of
+our circle, and never can be by those who were in
+it. His vivacity did much to relieve us from the
+depression that brooded over us. He and Clara
+Van, as he had taken to calling her as a sort of
+play upon caravan,&mdash;for was she not a whole
+team in herself? he would say,&mdash;he and Clara had
+many a lively contest of words, and were well
+matched in their powers of wit and repartee.</p>
+
+<p>Thus there were lights as well as shades,
+relief as well as depression, in our social life, but
+over it all was a shadow, the shadow of my
+mother-in-law.</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_115" id="Page_115">[115]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_X" id="CHAPTER_X"></a>CHAPTER X.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">MY MOTHER-IN-LAW SUBDUED.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">A</span>s</span> I was saying, I made up my mind that our
+happiness was marred by habitual submission
+to mother-in-law, and I determined to shake
+off the nightmare, to assert myself, and to reduce
+that stately crown of gray puffs to a subordinate
+place. How was I to do it? There was nothing
+that I could make the cause of direct complaint,
+and it was hard to get into a downright conflict
+which would involve plain speaking. I consulted
+with Bessie, and she agreed with me, and promised
+to assume the direction of household affairs. She
+did not like to hurt her mother&#8217;s feelings, but she
+admitted that it was best for her to be mistress.
+I could but admire the matronly firmness and tact
+with which she played her part. She gave her
+orders and told her mother what she proposed to
+do, and then proceeded to execute it as if there
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_116" id="Page_116">[116]</a></span>was no room for question. If opposition was
+made, she very quietly and firmly insisted. Her
+mother was astonished and had some warm words,
+in which she accused me of trying to set her
+daughter against her.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, no,&#8221; said Bessie, &#8220;Charlie does not wish to
+set me against you or to have you made unhappy,
+but he thinks it better that I should be the mistress
+here, and I quite agree with him, and propose
+henceforth to be the mistress.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>The widow was not offended, but hurt. She
+had too much good sense not to see the propriety
+of our decision, and she surrendered and tried
+not to appear affected.</p>
+
+<p>This was the first victory. Another time, at
+the table, she had exercised her prescriptive right
+of extinguishing me for some remark of which she
+did not approve. I fired up and remarked, &#8220;I
+have the right to speak my own opinion in my
+own house, Mrs. Pinkerton.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Certainly you have a right to speak your own
+opinion in your own house,&#8221; she replied, with
+the least little sarcastic emphasis on &#8220;your own
+house,&#8221; which cut me to the quick.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_117" id="Page_117">[117]</a></span>&#8220;But you don&#8217;t seem to think so,&#8221; I said.
+&#8220;You have had a way of snubbing me and putting
+me down which I don&#8217;t propose to tolerate
+any longer. I am master of my own conduct and
+of my own household, and I hope, in future, that
+my liberty may not be interfered with.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>The widow&#8217;s lip quivered, her great eyes moistened,
+and she left the table, not because she was
+offended, but to hide her injured feelings. I felt
+mean, and would have apologized, but that I felt
+that my cause was at stake. There was no after-explanation.
+My mother-in-law came and went
+about the house as usual, calm and polite. A silly
+woman would have refused to speak to me for
+some weeks; but she was not a silly woman, and
+took pains to speak with the most studied politeness,
+and to avoid offence. Here, too, she had
+evidently surrendered.</p>
+
+<p>This was victory number two. One more and
+the battle was won. It was a Sunday in June.
+I had especially invited Mr. Desmond and his
+niece to come out to dinner and to spend the
+afternoon, and had insisted to Fred Marston
+that he should come with his wife. I wanted to
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_118" id="Page_118">[118]</a></span>vindicate my right to have what friends I pleased,
+and then I didn&#8217;t care overmuch if I never saw
+him again. Mrs. Pinkerton had gone to church
+alone as usual. For some weeks Bessie had been
+unable to accompany her, and I preferred the
+sanctuary at which the scholarly, but heterodox,
+Mr. Freeman preached. When she returned, our
+guests had arrived. She put on her eye-glasses
+as she entered the gate, and looked about with
+evident disapproval, as we were scattered over the
+lawn. She did not believe in Sunday visits. She
+was even stiff and distant to Mr. Desmond, and
+refused to see the Marstons at all, though they
+were directly before her eyes. She walked
+straight into the house.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;By Jove,&#8221; said George to me in an undertone,
+&#8220;that isn&#8217;t right! I shall speak to mother about
+cutting your guests in that way.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Never mind,&#8221; I replied, &#8220;don&#8217;t you say a
+word; I want an opportunity.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>He saw it in a minute, and acquiesced with a
+queer smile. He fully sympathized with me, and
+had even encouraged me in the work of emancipation.
+He had the utmost respect and affection for
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_119" id="Page_119">[119]</a></span>his mother, but he said it was not right for her to
+make my home unpleasant.</p>
+
+<p>That Sunday Mrs. Pinkerton joined us at the
+dinner-table. I knew she would not be guilty of
+the incivility of staying away.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;You remember my friends, Mr. and Mrs. Marston?&#8221;
+I said, by way of introduction, as she came
+in.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I remember them very well,&#8221; was the reply;
+&#8220;too well,&#8221; the tone implied. I made a special
+effort to be talkative, and to keep others talking
+during the dinner. It was very hard work, and
+I met with indifferent success. It was not a pleasant
+dinner. Mr. Desmond alone appeared not to
+mind the restraint, and he alone ventured to
+address the widow. She was polite, but far from
+sociable. We contrived to pass the afternoon
+tolerably, but not at all in the spirit which I
+wished to have prevail when I had friends to visit
+me, and all because of that presence.</p>
+
+<p>After they were gone, I took occasion to introduce
+the subject, for I had learned that Mrs.
+Pinkerton&#8217;s skill in expressing her disapproval in
+her manner was so great that she relied on it
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_120" id="Page_120">[120]</a></span>almost altogether, and rarely resorted to words
+for the purpose.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I am afraid you did not enjoy the company
+very much to-day,&#8221; I said, as we were sitting in
+the little parlor, overlooking an exquisite flower
+garden.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No, sir,&#8221; she answered, with the old emphasis
+on the &#8220;sir.&#8221; &#8220;I do not approve of company on
+the Sabbath, and I had hoped you would never
+again bring those Marstons into my presence at
+any time.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Excuse me, madam; but I propose to be my
+own judge of whom I shall invite to visit me, and
+of the time and occasion. I presume you admit
+my right to do so.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Certainly, sir. I never disputed it, and had
+no intention of saying anything if you had not
+introduced the subject.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I introduced the subject for the very purpose;
+in fact, I brought out the company for the very
+purpose of vindicating my right, and it would be
+very gratifying to me if you would concede it
+cheerfully, and not, by your manner and way of
+treating my friends, interfere with it hereafter.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_121" id="Page_121">[121]</a></span>I was almost astonished at my own courage
+and spirit, and still more so at Mrs. Pinkerton&#8217;s
+reply. It was dusky and I could not see her face,
+but her voice trembled and choked as she answered,&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;God knows I do not wish to interfere with
+your happiness. Bessie&#8217;s happiness has been my
+one thought for years, and now it is bound up
+with yours. I have my own notions, which I cannot
+easily discard, but I would not do or say anything
+that would mar your enjoyment for the
+world. I have long felt that I did do so, and
+have made up my mind to make any sacrifice of
+pride and inclination to avoid it.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Here she actually broke down and sobbed, and
+I was very near joining her. &#8220;Never mind,&#8221; I
+said at length, quite softened; &#8220;I guess we shall
+get along pleasantly together in the future, now
+that we have an understanding.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I hope so,&#8221; she said, recovering her serenity,
+and we relapsed into a painful silence.</p>
+
+<p>This was the third and final victory, but I felt
+no elation over it. My mother-in-law receded
+somewhat into the background, but it was so much
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_122" id="Page_122">[122]</a></span>in sorrow, rather than anger, that I felt her new
+mood almost as depressing as the old. I didn&#8217;t
+want her to feel injured or subdued, but evidently
+she couldn&#8217;t help it, and the mother-in-law,
+though conquered, was herself still, and that congeniality
+that would make our life together wholly
+pleasant was impossible. Her existence was still
+a shadow, less chilling and more pensive, but a
+shadow in our home, and it seemed destined to
+stay there.</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_123" id="Page_123">[123]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_XI" id="CHAPTER_XI"></a>CHAPTER XI.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">GEORGE&#8217;S NEW DEPARTURE.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="floatleft">&#8220;</span><span class="dropcap">G</span>eorge</span> is growing very restless. I don&#8217;t
+know what ails him,&#8221; Bessie said to me.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I can guess,&#8221; I said, looking wise.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;What is it?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Do you remember what an uneasy, good-for-nothing
+chap one Charlie Travers was, when he
+first began to call on a certain young woman with
+conspicuous regularity?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;O Charlie, you don&#8217;t think he&mdash;&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No, no! Now don&#8217;t explode too suddenly.
+I wouldn&#8217;t have him know that I suspect anything
+for the world. We won&#8217;t name any names, but I
+keep my eyes about me, and I flatter myself I
+know the symptoms.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>And with these mysterious words, I started for
+the bank, leaving to Bessie a new and delightful
+subject for speculation and air-castle building.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_124" id="Page_124">[124]</a></span>George did not come home to supper that day,
+but that was nothing extraordinary. I was sitting
+out on the porch, smoking after the meal, and
+saw him coming up the street.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Where have you been?&#8221; I asked, as he joined
+me and took a seat.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;None of your business. In town.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Is Miss Van well?&#8221; I asked mischievously.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;How should I know?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Come, George, you don&#8217;t play the part of
+Innocence over well. Suppose you try Candor,
+and tell me where you have been.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;You mistake my identity. I&#8217;m not your
+baby. You will find the youthful Charlie entertaining
+his mother up stairs.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>A long-drawn-out, agonized wail, proceeding
+from the regions above, showed how Bessie was
+being entertained.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No opening yet?&#8221; I ventured to ask, changing
+the subject.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Not the slightest prospect. If some of these
+doctors could only be inveigled into taking some
+of their own prescriptions! But no; they are too
+wise.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_125" id="Page_125">[125]</a></span>&#8220;The bitterness of your tone would seem to
+indicate that you have not enjoyed your visit to
+the town.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;The town be hanged, and the country too!
+Let&#8217;s take a walk down the street. Give me a
+cigar, confound you! How hot it is!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>We strolled down the street.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;This is a terrible vale of tears, this world,&#8221;
+said I. &#8220;The world is hollow, and my doll is
+stuffed with sawdust, which accounts for his howling.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>George was silent. He pulled at his cigar ferociously,
+smoked it half up, threw it away, and
+replaced it by a cigarette.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;When a man throws away the best part of
+a Reina Victoria he is either flush or badly in
+love,&#8221; said I to myself. I waited patiently for
+him to speak, as I was perfectly willing to
+receive his confidence, but I didn&#8217;t have the
+chance. He maintained a loud silence all the
+way, and we walked back home as we had gone
+out.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Something&#8217;s up&mdash;something serious,&#8221; I informed
+Bessie that night, &#8220;but George does not
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_126" id="Page_126">[126]</a></span>confide in me worth a cent, which I think is a little
+unbrotherly.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>The following day George was absent from an
+early hour in the afternoon till long after all the
+household were fast asleep at night. I was awakened
+at about midnight by a light tapping at the
+door of our room, and slipped out of bed without
+disturbing Bessie or the baby.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Come up to my den!&#8221; whispered George, as
+I opened the door. &#8220;Don&#8217;t wake the others.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I quietly got into my clothes and crawled noiselessly
+up to George&#8217;s &#8220;den,&#8221; devoured by curiosity.
+The moment I caught sight of his handsome face
+I saw that it was all right with him, and that he
+had nothing but good news to tell me. We sat
+down, hoisted our heels to a comfortable altitude,
+and George told his story. I let him tell it himself
+here:&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I was feeling terribly blue yesterday, when
+you saw me,&#8221; he began, &#8220;as you could see. In
+the afternoon I went into town, and, according to
+a previous arrangement, hired a horse and buggy
+and called to take her out riding.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>(Of course &#8220;her&#8221; was Miss Van.)</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_127" id="Page_127">[127]</a></span>&#8220;We had agreed to take the old Linwood road,
+and follow it to the village, returning through the
+Maplewood Park and so getting back to the city
+at about six. We left the town and passed
+through the suburbs rapidly, until we struck into
+the country, and there I let the horse go his own
+pace, which was slow. So much the better.
+Miss Van Duzen was never more charming. We
+had the most agreeable bit of talk, and she drew
+me out till I amazed myself. She always does.
+It&#8217;s no use my telling you, Charlie, but I have
+been a fool in my love for her ever since the night
+she came into this cottage like a stray beam of
+sunshine on a cloudy day. My heart went out of
+my keeping the night she called here with the old
+gentleman. I believe it was her freshness, her
+moral purity, that acted on my morbid, half <i>blas&eacute;</i>
+spirit, like a tonic, and brought me on my feet.
+I&#8217;m talking random nonsense, you say, but why
+shouldn&#8217;t I? I&#8217;m drunk with love. Don&#8217;t laugh
+at me. I&#8217;ll be all right by daylight, except a
+headache. We got to talking about ourselves.
+Lovers always do, don&#8217;t they? You ought to
+know. There doesn&#8217;t seem to be much else in
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_128" id="Page_128">[128]</a></span>the world worth talking about. I told her all
+about myself,&mdash;my past, with its good and bad
+points, and my present hopes and purposes. It
+all popped out as naturally as possible. I suppose
+it would sound like drivel if I were to
+repeat it. Finally she began to laugh.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;&#8216;It is dangerous to make a woman your confidant,&#8217;
+she said. &#8216;How do you know that I can
+keep a secret better than any other of my sex?&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;&#8216;I am not afraid on that score,&#8217; said I. &#8216;This
+is my confessional. It is as sacred as any. Am
+I to receive absolution?&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;She could not fully promise that. She read
+me a neat little lecture. It was fascinating to
+thus receive correction at her hands. I pledged
+myself, when it was done, to follow the course
+laid out for me. Then I made bold to exchange
+<i>r&ocirc;les</i>. With some maidenly hesitation, which
+soon vanished, she in turn laid before me the
+inner history of her life. Ah, my boy, how little
+there was in it to gloss over! how much to humiliate
+the best and noblest of us men! It was a
+revelation that made me prostrate myself before
+her. I was not worthy to hear it.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_129" id="Page_129">[129]</a></span>George paused, and drummed on the table with
+his fingers nervously.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I may as well tell you all,&#8221; he resumed. &#8220;I
+had resolved to ask that girl to marry me when
+we started on our ride, but after what she said to
+me so simply and modestly, I positively could not
+do it. She expected me to speak, I know that,
+for she would not have told me what she did tell
+me, otherwise.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;So you didn&#8217;t speak? Oh, stupid, stupid
+boy!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I know it. But my tongue was tied. Perhaps
+it was all cowardice; I can&#8217;t say. I never
+was afraid of any one before. I came home
+utterly shattered and down-hearted. To-day I
+gravitated back to her, after a sleepless night.
+She received me with the same friendly smile as
+usual, but there seemed to be a slight shadow
+over her spirits. That little, almost imperceptible
+change filled me with joy. I jumped to a conclusion
+that intoxicated me, and made the plunge
+at once.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;&#8216;It is another case of the moth and the candle,&#8217;
+I said to her.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_130" id="Page_130">[130]</a></span>&#8220;&#8216;Thank you. So I am a candle? That is a
+fine figure of speech.&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;&#8216;Seriously speaking, I think we had not finished
+what we were talking of yesterday.&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;&#8216;What were we talking of yesterday?&#8217; she
+had the effrontery to ask. &#8216;Oh, yes, now I recollect.
+It was yourself. That subject, I fear, you
+will never finish talking of.&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;&#8216;Now that&#8217;s a very mean speech, all things
+considered,&#8217; I whined. &#8216;Do you want to strike a
+man, when he&#8217;s way down?&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;&#8216;Don&#8217;t play Uriah Heep. I hate &#8217;umble people.
+But if I have perchance pierced the thick
+epidermis of Parisian pride you have so long
+worn, I&#8217;m glad of it.&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;She likes to abuse me, and I enjoy it quite as
+well as she. She continued to scold me and mock
+me for some time, to disguise her actual mood.
+I saw through it, and let her have her way for
+a while. The meeker my replies, the greater the
+exaggerated harshness of her criticisms. At last
+I no longer attempted to reply at all. Leaning
+back in a corner of the sofa, I watched the play
+of her animated features and the light of her dark
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_131" id="Page_131">[131]</a></span>brown eyes, and felt that she was the one woman
+in the universe that suited me, the one woman I
+could respect and love passionately at the same
+time.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;&#8216;You say truly I am a coward. I am aware
+of that. I admit that I am all that is detestable.
+If such a wretch as you describe were to love a
+woman, what unhappiness for him! There could
+be no hope for him. He would know his own
+irredeemable unworthiness, and so could only
+slink away in shame.&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;&#8216;You are quite right,&#8217; she cried, laughing merrily.
+&#8216;That would be the only course for him to
+pursue.&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;&#8216;By the way,&#8217; I said, &#8216;that reminds me that
+my train goes out in twenty minutes.&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I rose, and she also stood up to accompany me
+to the door. I held out my hand. It was an
+unusual demonstration, and perhaps she thought
+it meant good-by in earnest. At least, as she
+put her hand in mine, I detected a look I had
+never before seen in the depths of those fine
+eyes. With a sudden, unpremeditated, and irresistible
+movement, I drew her close to me, folded
+my arms about her, and kissed her passionately.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_132" id="Page_132">[132]</a></span>&#8220;&#8216;Clara!&#8217; I whispered, &#8216;I love you! I love
+you! Don&#8217;t tell me to go.&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;She gently drew herself out of my reluctant
+arms, and though her eyes were misty now, I saw
+in them that I was to stay.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;That&#8217;s all the story I have to tell you, Charlie.
+I am too happy to-night to sleep, so I couldn&#8217;t
+let you sleep. I stayed and spent the evening.
+Mr. Desmond, bless his dear old heart! cried over
+Clara, and gave her an old-fashioned blessing.
+I walked home on air. Do I look very badly
+corned?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I gave him a rousing hand-shake, and wiped
+away a stray bit of moisture from my cheek.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;May I tell Bessie?&#8221; were my first words when
+I found my tongue.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Why not? There will be no long engagement
+in this case. The knot shall be tied as soon as
+possible.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>The announcement I made to my little wife the
+following morning was not entirely unexpected,
+yet it filled her with delight. Miss Van was the
+woman of all others that Bessie wished to have
+George marry. The arrangement was, therefore,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_133" id="Page_133">[133]</a></span>completely to her satisfaction, and she beamed
+upon the happy George with true sisterly affection.</p>
+
+<p>What effect would the news have upon Mrs.
+Pinkerton? I asked myself. I had not long to
+wait for an answer, for it was at the breakfast-table
+that George fired the shot.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Mother,&#8221; said the bold youth, &#8220;I&#8217;m going to
+be married.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>His mother abruptly stopped stirring her coffee,
+and her spine visibly stiffened, but she said nothing.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;The event will occur without delay. Of course
+it is useless to inform you who is the&mdash;&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Quite useless,&#8221; Mrs. Pinkerton broke in; &#8220;my
+wishes in the matter are not of the slightest consequence
+to you.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;On the contrary. Now, look here; don&#8217;t be
+so infernally quick to anticipate my wilfulness. I
+want to conform to your wishes if I can. <i>Que
+faire?</i>&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;We will talk about it after breakfast.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Accordingly, there was a serious passage-at-arms
+in the library after breakfast. George left
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_134" id="Page_134">[134]</a></span>the house a conqueror, but the conquered had no
+sort of intention of abandoning the campaign after
+a Bull Run defeat. In fact, war had only just
+been declared. It must not be supposed that it
+was a war the movements of which could be followed
+by the acutest military observer; the batteries
+were all masked, but the gunpowder was
+there. I felt confident that George would carry
+everything before him, and he did. He brought
+Miss Van over to spend the evening, and we had
+the pleasantest time imaginable. He would not
+allow his mother to say a word against Miss Van,
+and made a fair show of proving that the latter
+had, not only better blood, but also better breeding
+and a truer sense of propriety than my mother-in-law,
+that is, &#8220;when it came to the scratch,&#8221; as
+George said. &#8220;But who would give a snap for a
+young woman who can&#8217;t throw aside the shackles
+of conventionality once in a while, and be herself?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Miss Van was her own jolliest, sweetest self at
+this time. Her beauty had never been so noticeable:
+joy is an excellent cosmetic, and love paints
+far better than rouge or powder.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_135" id="Page_135">[135]</a></span>As soon as Mrs. Pinkerton had recovered from
+her defeat, and when the engagement had become
+an acknowledged fact which all the world
+might know, the wedding began to loom up
+before us, and I could not help wondering if St.
+Thomas&#8217;s Church was to be the scene of as fashionable
+and grand a display as on the occasion
+when Bessie and myself were made one.</p>
+
+<p>I felt reasonably certain that Mrs. Pinkerton
+would make an effort to that end, and I was curious
+to see how George would look on it.</p>
+
+<p>Bessie, I think, would have been glad to see the
+marriage take place with as much pomp and show
+as possible. She was intensely interested in what
+Clara should wear, and every visit from that young
+woman was the occasion for a vast deal of confidential
+and no doubt highly important <i>t&ecirc;te-&agrave;-t&ecirc;te</i>
+consultation.</p>
+
+<p>Mother-in-law sailed into the library one evening
+with unusual celerity of movement.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;George, dear,&#8221; she said, &#8220;this cannot be true!
+You would not permit such an eccentric, uncivilized
+proceeding. Surely you will not offend our
+friends by&mdash;&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_136" id="Page_136">[136]</a></span>&#8220;Avast there! Our friends be hanged!&#8221; cried
+George wickedly. &#8220;Yes, it&#8217;s true, too true. The
+ceremony will be private, and no cards. You can
+come, though! Next Wednesday, at two o&#8217;clock,
+sharp!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>This was cruel. I could see his mother almost
+stagger under the blow. She attempted to remonstrate,
+but it was too late. George assured her
+that &#8220;it was all fixed,&#8221; and that Clara had agreed
+with him regarding the details.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Honest old John Stephens will tie the knot,&#8221;
+said he, &#8220;and it will be just as tight as if Dr.
+McCanon manipulated the holy bonds. I trust we
+shall have the pleasure of your company, mother.
+Consider yourself invited. A few of the choicest
+spirits will be on hand. Clara will wear the most
+exquisite gray travelling suit you ever laid eyes
+on.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>The widow was flanked, outgeneralled, routed
+along the whole line. She brought forward all
+her reserve forces of good-breeding, and thus
+escaped a disastrous panic by retiring in good
+order.</p>
+
+<p>The ceremony occurred, as George had announced,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_137" id="Page_137">[137]</a></span>the following Wednesday. The near
+relatives and best friends of the young couple
+were present, and it was a quiet and thoroughly
+enjoyable affair for all who participated. An
+hour after they had been pronounced man and
+wife, George and his bride rode away to take the
+train for the mountains.</p>
+
+<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&#8220;And on her lover&#8217;s arm she leant,<br /></span>
+<span class="i2">And round her waist she felt it fold,<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">And far across the hills they went<br /></span>
+<span class="i2">In that new world which is the old.&#8221;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_138" id="Page_138">[138]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_XII" id="CHAPTER_XII"></a>CHAPTER XII.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">BABY TALK, OLD DIVES, AND OTHER THINGS.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">T</span>he</span> cottage seemed dull enough after the
+departure of George with his bride. Bessie
+was so absorbed by the care of our little one that
+she had very little time to think of anything else,
+and in fact the new-comer, for the time being,
+monopolized the attention of his grandmother as
+well as of his mother. I was therefore left to my
+own resources.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Baby is not very well, Charlie,&#8221; Bessie informed
+me, one morning, with an anxious air.
+&#8220;Do you think it would do to wrap him up well
+and take him for a little ride this afternoon?&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Yes, that&#8217;s a good idea. If I can get that
+black horse at the livery stable, I&#8217;ll bring him
+around this afternoon. But I don&#8217;t see why you
+should wrap him up. It&#8217;s hot as blazes.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;You don&#8217;t know anything about babies,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_139" id="Page_139">[139]</a></span>Charlie. Go along. Get a nice, easy carriage,
+and we&#8217;ll take mother with us. I long for a ride.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I departed, and secured the desired &#8220;team.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Towards two o&#8217;clock I drove up to the cottage,
+and the entire family bundled into the vehicle,
+and we were off. I chose a pleasant, shady road,
+and drove slowly, while Bessie and her mother
+filled the air with baby talk.</p>
+
+<p>As we were climbing the hill near Linwood, I
+saw, a short distance ahead of us, the form of an
+elderly gentleman toiling up the ascent in the sun.
+He seemed fatigued, and stopped as we drew near
+him, to wipe the beads of perspiration from his
+brow.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Why, it&#8217;s Mr. Desmond!&#8221; exclaimed Bessie.</p>
+
+<p>Sure enough! As he turned toward us I recognized
+the white vest, the expansive shirt-front, and
+the resplendent watch-chain that could belong to
+no other than &#8220;old Dives&#8221; himself.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;How d&#8217;ye do?&#8221; I cried, halting our fiery steed.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Ah! Mr. Travers, Mrs. Pinkerton, how do you
+do? Delighted to meet you. It&#8217;s very warm.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;How came you so far out in the country
+afoot?&#8221; I asked.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_140" id="Page_140">[140]</a></span>&#8220;I had some business at Melton, and lost the
+2:30 train back to town, so I started to walk to
+Linwood with the purpose of taking a train on the
+other road. They told me it was only a mile and
+a half, but&mdash;.&#8221; And he sighed significantly.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;How fortunate that we met you,&#8221; said Mrs.
+Pinkerton quickly, taking the words out of my
+mouth. &#8220;Get in and ride to Linwood with us.
+We have a vacant seat, you see.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I seconded her invitation, and without much
+hesitation he accepted, and took a seat by my
+side. The conversation turned naturally upon the
+&#8220;young couple&#8221; (Bessie and I were no longer
+referred to in that way), and Mr. Desmond
+extolled his niece unreservedly. Mother-in-law
+was evidently somewhat impressed, but I think
+she made some mental reservations.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Will you smoke, Mr. Desmond?&#8221; I asked,
+offering him a cigar.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;No, I thank you.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, I had forgotten you did not approve of
+the habit. Excuse me.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Mrs. Pinkerton explained to Mr. Desmond, apologetically,
+that I was an irresponsible victim of the
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_141" id="Page_141">[141]</a></span>nicotine poison. I laughed, but Mr. Desmond
+received the explanation solemnly, and expressed
+his abhorrence for &#8220;the weed.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>The old gentleman professed great admiration
+for baby, and said that he looked exactly like his
+mother; in fact, the resemblance was almost startling.</p>
+
+<p>By the time we had got to Linwood, our passenger
+had talked himself into a state of good-humor,
+and we left him at the railroad station,
+bowing and smiling with true old-school <i>aplomb</i>.</p>
+
+<p>Bessie thought the ride did Charlie, junior,
+good, and so it became a regular thing, on pleasant
+afternoons, to take him out for a little airing.
+Mrs. Pinkerton overcame her scruples, and usually
+accompanied us. A sample of the sweet
+converse held with my son and heir on the back
+seat will suffice:&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Sodywazzaleetlecatchykums! &#8216;Esoodavaboobangy!
+Mamma&#8217;s cunnin&#8217; kitten-baby!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>One day, just before noon, when I had been
+making a mental calculation as to how I should be
+able to cover the livery-stable bill, a fine equipage
+stopped in front of the bank, and through the
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_142" id="Page_142">[142]</a></span>window I saw the stately driver hand a note to
+our errand-boy. In a moment Tommy appeared
+in the room and handed me the billet, which ran
+thus:&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="blockquote"><p><span class="smcap">My dear Mr. Travers</span>,&mdash;I trust you will not take
+it amiss if I send my coachman out your way once in a
+while to exercise the ponies. Since Clara&#8217;s taking-off,
+they have stood still too much, and knowing that you go to
+ride occasionally with your family, I take the liberty of
+putting them at your disposal for the present, with instructions
+to John, who is a careful and trustworthy
+driver, to place himself at your service whenever you are
+so disposed. The obligation will be entirely on my part,
+if you will kindly take a turn behind the ponies whenever
+you choose. My regards to your wife and Mrs. Pinkerton.</p>
+
+<p class="sigline1">Believe me yours sincerely,</p>
+<p class="signature"><span class="smcap">T. G. Desmond</span>.</p>
+</div>
+
+<p>I could find no objection to accepting this
+kindly offer, so delicately made, but I did not
+dare to do so before consulting Bessie and her
+mother, so I stepped into the carriage and had
+John drive me to the cottage. There was a consultation,
+and after I had overcome some feeble
+scruples on Mrs. Pinkerton&#8217;s part, which I am
+afraid were hypocritical, we decided to take
+advantage of Mr. Desmond&#8217;s generosity. I sent
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_143" id="Page_143">[143]</a></span>a note of thanks back by John, and thenceforth
+we took our rides behind &#8220;old Dives&#8217;s&#8221; black
+ponies. Occasionally the old gentleman himself
+came out in the carriage, and proved himself as
+trustworthy and careful a driver as John, handling
+the &#8220;ribbons&#8221; with the air of an accomplished
+whip. The rides were very pleasant, those beautiful
+summer days, and the change from a hired
+&#8220;team&#8221; to the sumptuous establishment of Mr.
+Desmond was extremely grateful.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. Desmond was doubtless very lonely without
+his niece. She had been the light of his home,
+and her absence was probably felt by the old gentleman
+with more keenness than he had anticipated
+at the outset. His large and beautifully furnished
+mansion needed the presence of just such a person
+of vivacious and cheery character as Clara, to
+prevent it from becoming cheerless in its grandeur.
+He intimated as much, and appeared unusually
+restless and low-spirited for him. He sought to
+make up for the absence of the sunshine and joyousness
+that &#8220;Miss Van&#8221; had taken away with her,
+by applying himself with especial diligence to
+business; but he really had not much business to
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_144" id="Page_144">[144]</a></span>engross his attention, beyond collecting his interest
+and looking out for his agents, and it failed to
+fill the void. He betook himself to his club, and
+killed time assiduously, talking with the men-about-town
+he found there, playing whist, and
+running through the magazines and reviews in
+search of wit and wisdom wherewith to divert himself.
+The dull season had set in; there was little
+doing, in affairs, commerce, politics, or literature;
+and direct efforts at killing time always result in
+making time go more heavily than ever. Mr.
+Desmond&#8217;s attempt was like a curious <i>pas seul</i>,
+executed by a nimble actor in a certain extravaganza,
+the peculiarity of which is that at every
+forward step the dancer slides farther and farther
+backward, until finally an unseen power appears
+to drag him back into the flies.</p>
+
+<p>It was during one of our afternoon drives, when
+Mr. Desmond usurped the office of his coachman,
+that he confided to us a plan which he had devised
+to cure his <i>ennui</i>.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I have made up my mind,&#8221; he said, &#8220;to go
+abroad for a good long tour. It will be the best
+move I could possibly make.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_145" id="Page_145">[145]</a></span>&#8220;I don&#8217;t doubt it,&#8221; I said. &#8220;How soon do you
+propose to go?&#8221; And Bessie sighed, &#8220;O dear,
+how delightful!&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;My plans are not matured,&#8221; Mr. Desmond continued,
+&#8220;but I think I shall sail early next month.
+My favorite steamer leaves on the 6th.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I hope you will enjoy a pleasant voyage, and
+a delightful trip on the other side,&#8221; said Mrs.
+Pinkerton politely.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. Desmond returned thanks. Nothing more
+was said that day concerning his project. When
+he left us at the cottage, he remarked,&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;By the way, Mr. Travers, I wish you would
+call at my office to-morrow morning at or about
+eleven o&#8217;clock, if you can make it convenient to
+do so.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I will do so,&#8221; I replied, wondering what he
+could want of me.</p>
+
+<p>At the appointed hour the next day I was on
+hand at his office. He motioned to me to be seated
+and then said,&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Yesterday morning I met John K. Blunt, of
+Blunt Brothers &amp; Company, at my club, and he
+told me that their cashier had defaulted. An account
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_146" id="Page_146">[146]</a></span>of the affair is in this morning&#8217;s papers.
+They want a new cashier. I have mentioned your
+name, and if you will go around to their office
+with me, we will talk with Blunt.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Mr. Desmond&mdash;&#8221; I began, but he stopped
+me.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Don&#8217;t let&#8217;s have any talk but business,&#8221; he
+said. &#8220;The figures will be satisfactory, I am confident.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Satisfactory! They were munificent! Blunt
+liked me, and only a few short and sharp sentences
+from such a man as Desmond finished
+the business. I saw a future of opulence before
+me. My head was almost turned. I tried to
+thank Mr. Desmond, but he would not listen to my
+earnest expressions of gratitude.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I have engaged passage for the 6th,&#8221; he told
+me when we were parting; &#8220;I will try to call at
+your cottage before I get off. I am busy settling
+up some details now. Good day.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I hastened home with my good news. Bessie&#8217;s
+eyes glistened when she heard it, and even my
+mother-in-law showed a faint sign of pleasure at
+my good luck.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_147" id="Page_147">[147]</a></span>The following Saturday evening Mr. Desmond
+came out to see us.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Don&#8217;t consider this my farewell appearance,&#8221;
+he said. &#8220;I merely wished to tell you that my
+friends have inveigled me into giving an informal
+party Tuesday evening, at which I shall expect
+you all to appear.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>He talked glibly, for him, and gave us an outline
+sketch of his proposed tour. I thought he
+seemed strangely restless and nervous, and I
+pitied him.</p>
+
+<p>His &#8220;informal party&#8221; was really a noteworthy
+affair, and the wealth and respectability of the
+city were well represented. Bessie could not go,
+on account of the baby, so I acted as escort to
+Mrs. Pinkerton, who made herself amazingly
+agreeable. There were not many young people
+present, and the affair was quiet and genteel in the
+extreme. Bank presidents, capitalists, professional
+men, and &#8220;solid&#8221; men, with their wives, attired in
+black silks, formed the majority of the guests.
+They were Mr. Desmond&#8217;s personal friends. My
+mother-in-law was in congenial company, and I
+believe she enjoyed the evening remarkably.
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_148" id="Page_148">[148]</a></span>Most of the conversation turned, very naturally,
+upon European travel. Americans who are possessed
+of wealth always have done &#8220;the grand
+tour,&#8221; and they invariably speak of &#8220;Europe&#8221; in
+a general way, as if it were all one country.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;When I returned from my first tour abroad, a
+friend said to me that he &#8216;supposed it was a fine
+country over there,&#8217;&#8221; said Mr. Desmond to me,
+laughing.</p>
+
+<p>Some one asked him where he had decided to
+go.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I shall land at Havre, and go straight to
+Paris,&#8221; he answered. &#8220;I flatter myself I am a
+good American, and as I have been comparatively
+dead since my niece left me, I am entitled to a
+place in that terrestrial paradise.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I thought I had never seen Mrs. Pinkerton
+appear to so good advantage as she did on this
+occasion. Her natural good manners and her
+intelligence made her attractive in such a company,
+and she was the centre of a bright group of
+middle-aged Brahmins throughout the entire evening.
+Mr. Desmond appeared grateful for the
+assistance she rendered in making his party pass
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_149" id="Page_149">[149]</a></span>off pleasantly, and as for me, I began to feel that
+I had never quite appreciated her best qualities.
+She was a woman that one could not wholly know
+in a year, perhaps not in a lifetime. &#8220;Who
+knows?&#8221; I thought; &#8220;perhaps I have wronged
+my mother-in-law.&#8221;</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_150" id="Page_150">[150]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_XIII" id="CHAPTER_XIII"></a>CHAPTER XIII.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">A SURPRISE.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">W</span>e</span> were feeling a little solemn at the cottage.
+George, with his lively ways, and Clara,
+with her sparkling vivacity, were away on their
+wedding tour, and our good friend, Mr. Desmond,
+to whom we had taken a great liking, was about
+to sail for an indefinite absence in foreign lands.
+Though the mother-in-law&#8217;s presence was less
+oppressive than formerly, there was now a pensiveness,
+an air of departed glory about it, that
+was not cheerful. There was danger of settling
+down to a humdrum sort of life, free from strife,
+perhaps, but at the same time devoid of that buoyancy
+which should make the home of a young
+couple joyous.</p>
+
+<p>I was a little doubtful of making a vacation in
+the country this summer. To be sure, when
+George went away, it was agreed that after he
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_151" id="Page_151">[151]</a></span>had gone the round of the White Mountains, the
+attractions of Canada, Niagara Falls, and Saratoga,
+he would return for a quiet stay of a few
+weeks, at the close of the season, to the little
+resort which we had visited a year ago, and there,
+if Bessie&#8217;s health would permit, and I could
+arrange for a sufficient absence from business, we
+would join them. But I almost dreaded taking
+Mrs. Pinkerton with us, and doubted whether she
+would go; at the same time, I did not like to
+propose leaving her behind to take care of the
+cottage. I was in perplexity, and, notwithstanding
+my splendid new prospects in business, was
+not feeling cheerful.</p>
+
+<p>Coming home from a restless round of the city
+on the Fourth of July, where I had found the great
+national holiday a bore, I noticed Mr. Desmond&#8217;s
+team coming up to the garden gate with a brisk
+turn. That fine old gentleman&mdash;I always feel
+like calling him old on account of his gray whiskers,
+though he was little more than fifty&mdash;came down
+the walk and with stately politeness assisted Bessie
+and the baby out of the carriage. I looked to see
+Mrs. Pinkerton follow, but she was not there, and
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_152" id="Page_152">[152]</a></span>clearly Mr. Desmond had not been to ride. It
+struck me as a little queer, not to say amusing,
+that they had been having a quiet <i>t&ecirc;te-&agrave;-t&ecirc;te</i>
+together in the cottage while John gave Bessie and
+the baby their airing. But then, it was not so
+strange either, for was he not going to leave us in
+two days? It was no uncommon thing for Mrs.
+Pinkerton to stay within while Bessie was out, and
+he had probably dropped in late in the afternoon,
+expecting to find us all at home, as it was a holiday.
+I bade him good by in case I did not see
+him again, as he got into the carriage to ride back
+to the city.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, I shall see you to-morrow,&#8221; he said in a
+brisk tone which had not been habitual with him
+of late.</p>
+
+<p>That evening my mother-in-law was uncommonly
+gracious, a little absent-minded, and more
+pleasant in spirit than I had ever known her.
+She seemed to be filled with an inward satisfaction
+that I could not make out at all. Bessie and I
+both remarked it, but could not surmise any
+cause for the apparent change that had come over
+the spirit of her dream.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_153" id="Page_153">[153]</a></span>Next morning, on reaching town, I found a
+note asking me to step over to Mr. Desmond&#8217;s
+office when I could find time. I went at my leisure,
+wondering what was up. As I entered, he
+seemed remarkably cordial and happy.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I find that Blunt,&#8221; he said in a business-like
+way, &#8220;would like to have you take hold at once, if
+possible. Their affairs are in some confusion and
+need an experienced hand to straighten them out.
+It will be necessary for you to give a bond, which
+I have here all prepared, with satisfactory sureties,
+and you need only give us your signature, which
+I will have properly witnessed on the spot.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, is that it?&#8221; I thought. Strange I didn&#8217;t
+think of its having something to do with my new
+position. I knew I could get away from my
+old place at a week&#8217;s notice, as I had already
+made known my intention to leave, and there
+were several applicants for the position. The
+bond was executed without hesitation.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;You will not lose your vacation,&#8221; Mr. Desmond
+said, &#8220;though your salary will begin at
+once. As soon as you can get matters in order,
+which may take a month or more, you are to be
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_154" id="Page_154">[154]</a></span>allowed a few weeks&#8217; absence to recuperate and
+get fully prepared for your new responsibilities.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Thanking him for his kindness, I was about to
+go, when he said, &#8220;Sit down, Mr. Travers. I
+have something else to say to you.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;What&#8217;s coming now?&#8221; I wondered, as I took
+my seat again. Mr. Desmond seemed a little at
+a loss how to begin his new communication, and
+came nearer appearing embarrassed than I should
+have thought possible for him.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;The fact is,&#8221; he said at last, &#8220;I have changed
+my mind about going abroad.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I have no doubt I looked very much surprised
+and puzzled, and smiling at the expression of my
+face, he went on,&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Your mother-in-law, Mrs. Pinkerton, is a very
+worthy woman; in fact, a remarkably worthy
+woman.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I couldn&#8217;t deny that; but why should he choose
+such a time and place to compliment her?</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Do you know,&#8221; he added, with a still nearer
+approach to embarrassment in his manner, and
+something like a blush on his usually calm face,
+&#8220;I have asked her to become Mrs. Desmond.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_155" id="Page_155">[155]</a></span>&#8220;The devil you have!&#8221; was my thought as
+astonishment fairly overcame me. I didn&#8217;t say
+it, though, but it was my turn to be embarrassed,
+and I hardly knew what to say.</p>
+
+<p>Having got it out, Mr. Desmond fairly recovered
+his equanimity. &#8220;Yes,&#8221; he said, &#8220;I put the
+idea away from me for a long time, but it would
+persist in growing upon me, and I finally concluded
+that perhaps it might contribute to the
+happiness of <i>all</i> parties, so I have taken the
+plunge. I hope you approve of it,&#8221; he added,
+with a queer twinkle in his eye.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;With all my heart, sir,&#8221; I said earnestly; &#8220;and
+I am sure it will be as pleasing as it is surprising
+to us all.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Throughout that afternoon I was restless, and
+eager to get home to tell Bessie the wonderful
+news. It was the longest afternoon I ever saw,
+but at length it passed and I hurried home. As
+Bessie met me at the door I said eagerly, &#8220;I&#8217;ve
+got a surprise for you, deary.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>Now I noticed for the first time that she was all
+smiles and full of something that she was eager to
+surprise me with. Simultaneously each recognized
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_156" id="Page_156">[156]</a></span>that the other had the secret already. Of course;
+what a fool I was! Her mother naturally enough
+would tell her while Mr. Desmond broke the matter
+to me.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Isn&#8217;t it jolly?&#8221; I said.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Why, Charlie, are you then so anxious to get
+rid of poor, dear mamma?&#8221; she said, half reproachfully
+and half teasingly.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Oh, no, of course not, but it is really nice for
+all of us, isn&#8217;t it now? She won&#8217;t be far off, you
+know; we shall have our little home all to ourselves,
+and Mr. Desmond will be a sort of guardian
+for us. And as I said before, I think it is jolly.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Well, I must confess I do not altogether like
+the idea of mamma marrying again, and I shall
+miss her very much, after all.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p>I couldn&#8217;t help laughing at the little woman&#8217;s
+demure countenance, as she said this. There was
+a little trace of jealousy in her gentle heart&mdash;jealousy
+so natural to women&mdash;at the idea of
+another&#8217;s taking her mother off, just as that good
+woman had been jealous at her taking off. I
+accused her of it, and she repudiated the idea.</p>
+
+<p>But everybody must admit that things had
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_157" id="Page_157">[157]</a></span>fallen out just right for all parties, and the shadow
+was to be taken from our household by a
+new burst of sunlight, without any heart-burning
+for anybody, and with nothing but satisfaction for
+all. It was arranged that the new marriage
+should presently occur, and the mature couple
+take a little trip, and surprise George and Clara
+by being at the Fairview Hotel before them.
+Their first knowledge of the turn of affairs was to
+come when they arrived there late in August, and
+found their new relations in possession. Bessie
+and I were to join the party for a brief stay, and
+so my perplexity was happily ended.</p>
+
+
+
+
+<h2><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_158" id="Page_158">[158]</a></span><a name="CHAPTER_XIV" id="CHAPTER_XIV"></a>CHAPTER XIV.<br />
+
+<span class="caption">A HAPPY PROSPECT.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p class="newsection"><span class="firstword"><span class="dropcap">T</span>he</span> landscape is lovely in these latter days of
+August. The mountains are grand and solemn
+in their everlasting silence. We are together
+at the Fairview, and everybody feels free and
+happy. There is no restraint, and our future prospects
+are delightful. Before George left home in
+June he had made application for a vacant chair
+in the Medical College and presented his credentials
+and testimonials. He expected nothing from
+it, he said, but would leave me to look out and
+see what decision was made. I had brought with
+me the news of his appointment. I had also secured
+for him the refusal of an elegant house which
+had been suddenly vacated and offered for sale on
+account of the failure in business of its owner. It
+was very near our cottage, had lovely surroundings,
+was beautifully furnished, and was to be
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_159" id="Page_159">[159]</a></span>sold with all its contents. It has now been decided
+between George and Mr. Desmond that it
+shall be purchased at once, and shall become the
+legal possession of Clara, being paid for out of
+her ample fortune, now under her own control,
+but not yet taken from her uncle&#8217;s keeping.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. and Mrs. Desmond will take possession of
+the city mansion, and I have no doubt that its
+state and elegance will be fully kept up. I see
+before me happy times for us all, and at last I
+think we understand and appreciate each other.
+Our relations being properly and happily adjusted,
+there will be no more &#8220;unpleasantness.&#8221; And I
+must acknowledge that, in spite of past feelings
+and the little clouds that have flecked our sky,
+sometimes appearing dark and portentous, these
+happy results are due in no small measure to
+<span class="smcap">My Mother-in-Law</span>.</p>
+
+<p class="end"><span class="smcap">The End</span>.</p>
+
+
+
+<div class="note">
+<p><strong>Transcriber&#8217;s Note:</strong> The table below lists all corrections applied to
+the original text.</p>
+
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#Page_39">p. 39</a>: a hand encased in a mit &rarr; mitt</li>
+<li><a href="#Page_128">p. 128</a>: [added quotes] better than any other of my sex?&#8217;</li>
+<li><a href="#Page_131">p. 131</a>: [added quotes] slink away in shame.&#8217;</li>
+<li><a href="#Page_133">p. 133</a>: [added quotes] <i>Que faire?</i>&#8221;</li>
+<li><a href="#Page_145">p. 145</a>: And Besssie sighed &rarr; Bessie</li>
+</ul>
+</div>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of That Mother-in-Law of Mine, by Anonymous
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of That Mother-in-Law of Mine, by Anonymous
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: That Mother-in-Law of Mine
+
+Author: Anonymous
+
+Release Date: October 16, 2009 [EBook #30270]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THAT MOTHER-IN-LAW OF MINE ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Irma Spehar, Markus Brenner and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+ THAT MOTHER-IN-LAW
+ OF
+ MINE.
+
+
+ "BE TO HER VIRTUES VERY KIND,
+ BE TO HER FAULTS A LITTLE BLIND."
+
+
+ PHILADELPHIA:
+ THE KEYSTONE PUBLISHING CO.
+ 1889.
+
+
+
+ COPYRIGHT
+ BY JOHN E. POTTER AND COMPANY,
+ 1879
+
+
+
+ Dedicated
+ TO ALL THOSE HAVING
+ MOTHERS-IN-LAW
+ OR EXPECTING TO HAVE.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+
+CHAPTER Page
+
+ I. BESSIE AND I AND BESSIE'S MOTHER 7
+
+ II. COURTING THE MOTHER 15
+
+ III. OUR MARRIAGE 28
+
+ IV. MOUNTAINS AND MORE MOTHER-IN-LAW 37
+
+ V. THE RISE AND FALL 50
+
+ VI. WHAT IS HOME WITHOUT A MOTHER-IN-LAW? 71
+
+ VII. MISS VAN'S PARTY AND ANOTHER UNPLEASANTNESS 84
+
+VIII. ANOTHER CHARLIE IN THE FIELD 98
+
+ IX. THE SHADOW ON OUR LIFE 108
+
+ X. MY MOTHER-IN-LAW SUBDUED 115
+
+ XI. GEORGE'S NEW DEPARTURE 123
+
+ XII. BABY TALK, OLD DIVES, AND OTHER THINGS 138
+
+XIII. A SURPRISE 150
+
+ XIV. A HAPPY PROSPECT 158
+
+
+
+
+MY MOTHER-IN-LAW.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+BESSIE AND I AND BESSIE'S MOTHER.
+
+
+"Why, Charlie, you sha'n't talk so about my mother! I won't allow it."
+
+"It does sound a little rough, my dear; but I can't help it. She does
+exasperate me so. She doesn't show a proper deference for your husband,
+my dear. We are married now, and she ought to give up her objections to
+me. I can't be expected to place myself in her leading strings."
+
+"But you mustn't demand too much at once, and should try to conciliate
+her. Now do, for my sake; won't you, dear?"
+
+Here we were, only a month married, and spending our honeymoon at a most
+charming summer resort, where there was no excuse for getting out of
+patience. Everything was beautiful and attractive: Little hotel,
+strange to say, quite delightful; no fault to find with surroundings and
+accommodations; my darling Bessie, as sweet as an angel and determined
+to be happy and to make me happy; everything, in short, calculated to
+give us a long summer of delight.
+
+That is, if Bessie had only been an orphan. But there was her mother,
+who had joined us on our summer trip, after the first two weeks of
+unalloyed happiness, and threatened to accompany us through life.
+Already it almost made the prospect dismal. The idea that Bessie and I
+would ever quarrel, or even have any impatient words together, had
+seemed to me to be simply ridiculous. I had seen what I had seen. My
+dashing friend, Fred, and his stylish wife,--they had been married two
+years, and a visible coldness had come upon them. I knew, by an
+occasional angry whisper and knitting of the brow before people, that he
+must sometimes swear and rave in the privacy of their own rooms, and her
+cutting replies or haughty indifference showed that there had been a
+deal of love lost between them in those two years.
+
+Other people, too, got indifferent or downright hostile in their
+marital relations. But then, I was not a dashing fellow and Bessie was
+not stylish, and in other ways we were quite different from most people.
+Ours had been a real love-match from the first. Bessie was simple and
+unaffected, honest and pure in every thought, and determined to make me
+a faithful and loving wife till death did us part. As for me, why, of
+course I was generous and affectionate, ready to make any sacrifice and
+bear any burden for the trusting creature who had so freely given
+herself into my keeping. There should be no clouds to darken her life. I
+would never be selfish or impatient, or for one moment hurt her gentle
+heart by heedless act or careless word.
+
+But plague upon it! I could not get on with her mother; and here I was,
+before our summer holiday was over, and before we had settled down to
+that home life in which trouble and annoyance must needs come, getting
+out of patience and saying cruel things; and there was Bessie, sitting
+in the summer twilight with a light shawl drawn over her shoulders,
+pouting her pretty lips with vexation, and digging the toes of her
+little boots into the balustrade in front of us, because I had expressed
+a pious wish that her mother was in Jericho. I declare, if there weren't
+tears gathering in her gentle blue eyes!
+
+I was angry with myself, and, putting my arm around her slender waist, I
+laid my cheek against hers and said soothingly, "Never mind, darling! I
+didn't mean it. Don't think any more about it."
+
+But as we sat for the next five minutes without saying a word, I
+couldn't help pondering on the possibilities of the future, for Mrs.
+Pinkerton was to live with us. That was one of the understood conditions
+of our bargain, and it was evident that she was to furnish the test of
+all my good resolutions.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton had been left a widow when Bessie was twelve years old,
+with a neat little cottage in the suburbs of the city and a snug
+competence in a secure investment. I was fairly settled in business,
+with an income that would enable us to live in modest comfort, and was
+determined not to disturb the investment or have it drawn upon in any
+way for household expenses. But the old lady--I already began to speak
+of her by that disrespectful epithet, although she was still under
+fifty--was to live with us. I had readily acquiesced in that
+arrangement, for was it not my darling's wish? And I could not decently
+make any objection, for it was mighty convenient to have a pretty
+cottage, ready furnished, in one of the finest suburbs of the city in
+which I was employed.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton was a good woman in her way: how could she be anything
+else and the mother of such an angel as I had secured for my wife? She
+meant well, of course; I admitted that, and I ought to be on the
+pleasantest terms with her, and determined from the first that I would
+be. But somehow we were not congenial, and when that is the case the
+best people in the world find it hard to get along agreeably together.
+
+The course of true love between Bessie and me had run very smooth. From
+the moment my old school-fellow, her brother George, now in Paris
+studying medicine, had introduced me to her, I had been completely won
+by her sweet disposition and charming ways, and she in turn was
+captivated by my manly independence, strong good sense, and generous
+impulses. I am not vain, but the truth is the truth; and, as I am
+telling this story myself, I must set down the facts. We fell in love
+right away, and it was not long before we were mutually convinced that
+we were made expressly for each other and could never be happy apart.
+
+So it happened that I had to do the courting with the mother. She was
+the one to be won over, and it was not likely to be an easy task, for I
+plainly saw that she did not quite approve of me. When I was first
+introduced to her, she looked at me with her great, steady blue eyes, as
+if analyzing me to the very boots, and evidently set me down as a
+somewhat arrogant and self-sufficient young fellow who needed a
+judicious course of discipline to teach him humility. I was generally
+self-possessed and had no little confidence in myself, but I confess
+that I was embarrassed in her presence. She was not at all like Bessie,
+I thought. She had taught school in her youth, and had learned to
+command and be obeyed. The late Mr. Pinkerton, I fancied, had found it
+useless to contend against her authority, and this had increased her
+disposition to carry things her own way; and her seven years' widowhood,
+with its independence and self-reliance, had not prepared her to be
+submissive to the wishes of others.
+
+Still, she loved her daughter with tender devotion, and her chief
+anxiety was to have her every wish gratified. Therein was my advantage,
+for I knew that Bessie, gentle and trusting as she was, would never give
+me up or allow her life to be happy without the gratification of her
+first love. So I set to work confidently to make myself agreeable to the
+widow and win her consent to our marriage.
+
+"You must bring mamma around to approve of it," Bessie had said, on that
+ever-to-be-remembered evening, when we were returning from a long drive,
+and after an hour of sweet confidences she had surrendered herself
+without reserve to my future keeping. "She is the best mother in the
+world, and loves me very much, but she is peculiar in some ways, and I
+am afraid she doesn't altogether like you. I would not for the world
+displease her, that is, if I could help it," she added, glancing up, as
+much as to say, "It is all settled now forever and forevermore, whatever
+may befall, but do get my mother to consent to it with a good grace."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+COURTING THE MOTHER.
+
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton sat in an easy-chair near the window, doing nothing, when
+I marched in to begin the siege. I felt diffident and uneasy, although I
+am not usually troubled that way. But if I should live to the advanced
+age of Methusaleh, I could never forget Mrs. Pinkerton's appearance on
+that memorable occasion. Before I had spoken a word I saw that she knew
+what was coming, and had hardened her heart against me. She had
+anticipated all that I would say, had discounted my plea, as it were,
+and prejudged the whole case. Her look plainly said: "Young man, I know
+your pitiful story. You needn't tell me. You may be very well as young
+men go, you fancy you can more than fill a mother's place in Bessie's
+inexperienced heart, but you can't get me out. I am Adamant. Your
+intentions are all very honorable, but you are a graceless intruder.
+Your credentials are rejected on sight." I saw the difficult task I had
+undertaken. "Mrs. Pinkerton," I said, mustering all my forces, "it is no
+use mincing the matter, or beating about the shrubbery. I am in love
+with your daughter, and Bessie is in love with me. I believe I can make
+Bessie happy, and am sure nothing but Bessie can make me happy. I have
+come to ask your consent to our marriage." Then I hung my head like a
+whipped school-boy.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton took off her eye-glasses, and then put them on again with
+considerable care; after which she leveled a look at me and through me
+that made me feel like calling out "Murder!" or making for the door. But
+I stood my ground, and heard her say quietly,--
+
+"So you are engaged to my daughter?"
+
+A simple remark, but the tone meant "You are a puppy." I had to muster
+all my resolution to reply politely and coolly that, with her gracious
+consent, such was the fact.
+
+"Are you aware that it is customary to obtain parental consent before
+proceeding to such lengths?"
+
+"Mrs. Pinkerton, excuse me. I thought in my ignorance that it would be
+just as well to do that afterwards; or rather, I didn't think anything
+about it. I was so much in love with Bessie that it was all out before I
+knew it. If I had thought, of course I would have--"
+
+"Yes, yes," said Mrs. Pinkerton, "if your kind of people ever thought,
+they would undoubtedly do differently. Bessie certainly ought to know
+better. Girls rush into matrimony now-a-days with as much carelessness
+as they would choose partners at a game of croquet. I should have been
+consulted in this. It is all wrong to allow young people to have such
+entire freedom in affairs of this kind as they are allowed in these
+days."
+
+"But certainly, my dear Mrs. Pinkerton," I said, becoming somewhat
+impatient, "you will not refuse your consent in this case? Bessie's
+happiness--that is, the happiness of all of us, or--our
+happiness--Bessie's and mine, I would say--"
+
+"No doubt your happiness is very important to yourself, Mr. Travers,
+and as to my daughter's well-being, I have looked to that for quite a
+number of years past, and I flatter myself I shall be able to look out
+for it in the future."
+
+"Not if you insist on parting us!" I cried, getting out of patience and
+letting all my carefully prepared plans of assault go by the board. "You
+may withhold your consent, but that cannot prevent our loving each
+other!"
+
+"Of course not. Nothing on earth can prevent young people who are in
+love from making themselves ridiculous. But getting married and living
+together soon cures them of sentimentalism."
+
+"Won't you give us that chance to be cured then, my dear Mrs.
+Pinkerton?" I exclaimed, regaining a little tact.
+
+She seemed to be taking it under advisement, and my courage came up a
+little. Then, looking at me with her peculiarly searching gaze, she
+said, "It isn't necessary to argue the case; I know all you would say.
+You love Bessie to distraction; you could not live without her; your
+heart would be hopelessly broken if you had to give her up; you will be
+true to her forever and a day; you offer her all of the good things of
+this world that any sane woman could desire, besides which you throw in
+an eternal, undying devotion; and so on, to the end of the chapter. We
+will consider that all said, and so save time and trouble. You think
+that ought to end the matter and bring me to your way of thinking. I
+wonder at the effrontery of young men, who walk into our households and
+carelessly tell us mothers what is best for our children, and assure us,
+between their puffs of tobacco smoke, that a case of three weeks'
+moonshining outweighs the devotion of a lifetime."
+
+I began to see what course was open for me. The old lady was jealous,
+and I could not blame her. Her objections were general, not specific.
+Strategy must take the place of a direct assault. There flashed through
+my mind the ridiculous old nonsense rhyme quotation,--
+
+ "I must soften the heart of this terrible cow."
+
+I said gently, "I can readily see how a mother must regard the claims of
+the man who comes to her demanding her most precious treasure; and what
+you say makes me feel how presumptuous my demand must seem. I love your
+daughter--that must be my only excuse. And after all, what has happened
+was only what a mother must expect. Your daughter's love will not be the
+less yours because she also loves the man of her choice. That she should
+love and be loved was inevitable."
+
+"We will not go into the discussion any further," she interrupted. "I
+don't wish to say anything uncomplimentary of you personally, but I
+simply am not prepared to give my daughter up at present. My opinion of
+men in general is good, so long as they do not interfere with me or
+mine."
+
+(Mental note: "May there be precious little interference between us!")
+
+"Your judgment is doubtless good," I said, smiling; "but there are
+exceptions which prove the rule, and I hope you will find that even I
+will improve upon acquaintance."
+
+"Your conceit is abominable, young man."
+
+"Thank you. I have found no one who could flatter me except myself, so I
+lose no opportunity to give myself a good character."
+
+"Especially in addressing the mother of the woman you wish to marry,
+eh?"
+
+"Precisely, as she is naturally prejudiced against me. My dear Mrs.
+Pinkerton, what must I do to please you?"
+
+"Hold your tongue!"
+
+"Anything but that. You admit that I am a good fellow enough, and that
+Bessie would probably marry some one in course of time. Now, I don't see
+why you cannot make us both happy by giving your consent. It costs you a
+pang to do it. I honor you for that. Give me the right to console you."
+
+"By making myself an object of pity? No, not yet, not yet. I must, at
+least, have time to think."
+
+I inwardly cursed my luck. How long was this sort of thing going to
+last? I was about to rise and take my leave, when an inspiration struck
+me.
+
+"Mrs. Pinkerton," I said gravely, "what you have said of the ties that
+exist between you and your daughter has touched me deeply. I believe we
+young people do not half appreciate a mother's unchanging love. It lies
+so far beneath the surface that we are too apt to forget its constant
+blessing. My mother died when I was very young. Ah, if she were only
+here now, to plead my cause for me!"
+
+With these words, I turned on my heel and hastily got out of the room. I
+went into the garden and lighted a cigar, the better to think over the
+situation. I could not determine what progress, if any, I had made in
+the good graces of Mrs. Pinkerton. While I was cogitating, Bessie came
+out and approached me with an inquiring look. I am afraid my returning
+glance did not greatly reassure her. As she came up and took my arm, she
+said,--
+
+"Well?"
+
+"Well! No, it's not very well. I am beaten, my dear. Your mother is
+simply a stony-hearted parent!"
+
+"What did she say?"
+
+"Oh, she wants you to grow up an old maid--as if such a thing were
+possible!--and says that lovers have no idea of what a mean, cruel thing
+it is to rob people of only daughters; and that she shall require time
+to think of it. What do you think of that?"
+
+Bessie knitted her pretty brows, and dug her toes into the walk.
+
+"Perhaps I had better go to her?" she said.
+
+"Of course you must. But I know it won't be of any use just yet. We
+must, as she says, give her time. She will come around all right at the
+end of nine or ten years. The fact is, Bessie, she's a little bit
+jealous of me and regards me as an intruder."
+
+"Poor, dear mamma!" said Bessie, her eyes becoming moist.
+
+"Poor, dear pussy-cat! You should have seen her shoot me with her eyes
+and ridicule my honest sentiment. She used me roughly, my dear, and I
+can't help wondering at my amazing politeness to her."
+
+Bessie was not discouraged. She had several interviews with her mother,
+in which protestations, tears, smiles, and coaxings played a part, but
+there was no apparent change of heart on the part of the old lady, after
+all. I don't know how long this disagreeable state of affairs would have
+continued under ordinary circumstances, had not an unexpected,
+thrilling, and, as it happened, fortunate occurrence hastened a crisis
+and brought an end to the siege. It was a very singular thing, and it
+seemed to have been pre-arranged to bring me glory, and, what was
+better, the desired goodwill of the "stony-hearted parent."
+
+If there was any one thing that the worthy Mrs. Pinkerton detested more
+than men and tobacco, that thing was a burglar. Add fear to detestation,
+and you will see that when I defended the old lady from the attentions
+of a burglar, I had taken a long step into her good graces.
+
+It was a week after the interview narrated above, and in the early
+summer, Mrs. Pinkerton had gone down to a quiet sea-side resort for a
+short stay, thinking to get away from me; but I was not to be put off
+so. I followed her, taking a room at the same hotel.
+
+About one o'clock at night, the particular burglar to whom I owe so
+much, effected an entrance into the hotel through a basement window, and
+quietly made his way up stairs. Every one was asleep except myself, and
+I was planning all sorts of expedients to conquer the prejudices of my
+mother-in-law that was to be. Mrs. Pinkerton's room opened on a long
+corridor, near the end of which my modest seven-by-nine snuggery was
+situated. It was a warm night, and the transoms over the doors of almost
+all the bed-chambers had been left open to admit the air. A gleam of
+light from a dark-lantern, coming through my transom, was what led me to
+hastily don a pair of trousers and take my revolver from my valise. Then
+I opened my door very cautiously, without having struck a light, and
+could see--nothing! I waited a few moments, almost holding my breath. At
+the end of those few moments I could make out the form of a man swarming
+over the top of the door of Mrs. Pinkerton's room. His head and
+shoulders were already inside the room, and I could see his legs wriggle
+about as he noiselessly wormed his way through the narrow transom. It
+took me but a brief second of time to glide forward on tiptoe and mount
+the same chair which had been used by the intruder in climbing to the
+transom. This done, I seized both the wriggling legs simultaneously, and
+gave a tremendous pull.
+
+My excitement must have imbued me with double my natural strength, and
+the result of that pull was simply indescribable. Burglar,
+transom-glass, chair and all, went in a heap on the floor of the
+corridor, producing the most appalling and unearthly racket conceivable.
+The whole house was in an uproar in a moment. People seemed to spring up
+from every square foot of floor in the corridor as if by magic. Cries of
+"Fire!" "Murder!" "Help!" and screams of frightened women, rose on every
+hand. The costumes which I beheld on that momentous occasion were not
+only varied but exceedingly amusing and picturesque as well. The
+assembled multitude found nothing to interest them, however. I alone was
+to be seen, seated on a broken chair, with a rapidly swelling black eye,
+while broken glass and an extinguished lantern lay on the floor. I told
+the male guests what had happened. The burglar had not waited to ask for
+my card, but had contented himself with planting one blow from the
+shoulder on my left eye, before I could get upon my legs. And my
+revolver. Well, I had not had the ghost of a chance to use it. It was in
+my pocket. Fifteen minutes after the fracas, Mrs. Pinkerton came to my
+room, completely dressed, and insisted upon coming in to hear all about
+it and to overwhelm me with thanks and admiration. I was as modest as
+heroes proverbially are, and then and there told her never to refer to
+the subject again unless she addressed me as Bessie's betrothed.
+
+We went riding together, Bessie, Mrs. Pinkerton, and I, the day after
+this episode; and without any previous indication of an approaching
+thaw, that singular old lady began to talk freely about what should be
+worn at "the wedding," referring to it as though she had been the
+principal agent in bringing it about.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+OUR MARRIAGE.
+
+
+So it was that I brought my darling's mother around to consent, if not
+with a very good grace, still with apparent cheerfulness, and she at
+once took the direction of the nuptial preparations. I made a show of
+consulting her about many things, but she invariably gave me to
+understand that her experience and superior knowledge in such matters
+were not to be gainsaid. I was willing to leave to her all the fuss and
+frippery of preparing clothes for her daughter. It always seemed to me
+that she had clothes enough, and clothes that were good enough for
+married life. I couldn't understand why a young woman, on becoming a
+wife, should need a lot of new and elaborate dresses, such as she had
+never worn and never cared to wear, and an endless variety of
+under-garments of mysterious and incomprehensible make, with frills and
+fringes and laces and edgings, as if, up to that time, she had never had
+anything next to her precious person, except what was visible to the
+exterior world. And even assuming that she donned these things for the
+first time as parts of a manifold and complicated wedding garment, why
+should so much fine needle-work and delicate trimming be prepared to be
+stowed away out of sight of prying mortals, for whose vision women are
+presumed to dress themselves? Are they got up to show to friends and
+excite envy, and to fill the minds of other young people with a sense of
+the difficulties of getting married?
+
+One day, when I happened in,--by accident, of course,--and the mother
+happened to be out on one of her many pilgrimages to town, Bessie took
+me up to her room in a half-frightened way, as if doing something that
+she was afraid was terribly improper, and showed me a bewildering
+profusion of these things, neatly tucked away in bureau drawers. I
+laughed outright, and asked her who was to see all that finery. She was
+vexed and bit her lip, and I was sorry and voted myself a brute. From
+that moment, I determined not to say a word about the clothes, except to
+express unstinted admiration.
+
+There was not only clothing, but blankets and quilts and bed linen,
+though we were to live in her old home, which was already well supplied.
+One would suppose that a large and sudden increase of family was
+expected at once. These things annoyed me as senseless, and as absorbing
+so much of my Bessie's attention that we didn't have half the blissful
+times together that we had before our engagement was an acknowledged
+thing. But I knew that it was the mother's doings. Bessie did not really
+have any foolish care for dress, though always beautifully arrayed
+without any apparent effort; but she supposed it was the proper thing,
+and submitted to her mother.
+
+But there was one thing I set my heart on. I wanted a quiet wedding,
+without display or pretence. It did seem to me that this was a private
+occasion in which the wishes of the persons chiefly concerned should be
+consulted. It was their business and should be conducted in their own
+way. Bessie sympathized with me, and wanted of all things to go to
+church quietly and privately, and then, after a leave-taking with a few
+intimate friends at home, start right off on our proposed trip to the
+White Mountains. But no; we were inexperienced, and the widow knew what
+the occasion demanded much better than we did. She was a little grand in
+her ideas, and felt the importance of keeping on good terms with
+society. I was disposed to apply profane epithets to society, and to
+insist that this marriage was mine and Bessie's, and nobody's else. But
+what was the use? There would be unpleasant feelings, and the mamma must
+be conciliated, and so I yielded after a warm but altogether
+affectionate little controversy with Bessie.
+
+Every time I came to the house now, I was informed of some new feature
+which Mrs. P. had decided upon as indispensable to the gorgeousness of
+the occasion.
+
+"Have you ordered your dress suit yet?" she asked one evening.
+
+"Dress suit? Oh yes. I had almost forgotten that."
+
+"And, by the way, those cards? I think you had better send them out:
+you write such a good, legible hand."
+
+"Y-e-s, oh yes. With pleasure."
+
+"When you go to the city to-morrow, I wish you would drop in at Draper's
+and get me a few little things. I have made out a list, so it won't be
+any trouble to you."
+
+"No trouble at all. Glad to do it."
+
+"That white ribbon should be medium width. And before I forget it, have
+you written yet to your friend De Forest about his standing up?"
+
+"No, I forgot it. I'll drop him a line to-morrow. But what do you want
+that ribbon to be so long for?"
+
+"That is to be held across the aisle by the ushers, you know, to keep
+off the _ignobile vulgus_. You and Bessie will march up _here_, you see,
+preceded by the four ushers and the bridesmaids and groomsmen, who will
+then range themselves off this way. The members of the families and the
+friends will be separated from the other people _thus_. It's very
+pretty. Belle Graham was married that way at St. Thomas's, and everybody
+said it was splendid."
+
+This is the kind of talk I had to listen to for weeks, and is it any
+wonder that I grew thin and had sleepless nights?
+
+I was now a mere puppet in the hands of Mrs. Pinkerton, and came and
+went as she pulled the wires. She had arranged that the affair was to
+take place in "her church"--and a very fashionable temple of worship it
+was. Her rector was to officiate, assisted by the vealy young man who
+had just graduated from the theological seminary. There were to be four
+bridesmaids and an equal number of groomsmen and of ushers. I should
+have liked to have something to say about who should "stand up" with us,
+as Mrs. Pinkerton expressed it; but when I timidly suggested that some
+of my friends would be available for the purpose, I was taken aback to
+learn that the entire list had been made up and decided upon without my
+knowledge, and that only one of the groomsmen chosen was a friend of
+mine,--De Forest,--the others being young men whom the worthy Mrs.
+Pinkerton had selected from her list of society people. One of the young
+men was a downright fool, if I must call things by their right names,
+but he dressed to perfection; the remaining two I scarcely knew by
+sight, but I did know that one of them had seen the time when he aspired
+to occupy the place I was now filling in respect to the Pinkerton
+household: need I say more concerning my sentiments regarding him?
+
+The ushers,--well, of course, they were the four young gentlemen who
+knew everybody who was anybody, and I could not object to them,
+considering that they charged nothing for their onerous services.
+
+The bridesmaids were all old school friends of Bessie's, and two of them
+were considered pretty, and the other two were stylish.
+
+One of my keenest regrets was that Bessie's brother George was away off
+in Paris, and could not grace the occasion with his superb presence; for
+he was a superb fellow in all respects, and I felt a true brotherly
+affection for him. Had he not introduced me to Bessie? Had he not always
+wanted me to become his brother-in-law?
+
+The great day came at last. The town was full of the invited people, and
+the weather, so anxiously looked to on such occasions, was all that
+could be desired. My remembrance of the solemn events of that day is
+now rather misty. I remember the tussle De Forest and I had with my
+collar and cravat in the morning, and how he stuck pins into my neck,
+and wrestled mightily with his own elaborate toilet. I remember, and
+this very distinctly, how awfully tight were my new patent-leather
+boots, which caused me for the time being the most excruciating anguish.
+Beyond these, and similar minor things which have a way of sticking in
+the memory, all the rest is very much like a vivid dream. The close
+carriage whirling through the streets; a great crush of people, with
+here and there a familiar, smiling face; Bessie in her wedding-dress of
+white silk, with her long veil and twining garlands of orange blossoms;
+the bridesmaids, radiant in tarletan, with pretty blue bows and sashes;
+the long aisle, up which we marched with slow and reverent tread; the
+pealing measures of the Wedding Chorus; the dignified and fatherly
+clergyman; the vealy young assistant; the unction of the slowly intoned
+words of the marriage-service; the fumbling for the ring,--and through
+it all there rises, as out of a mist, the face of my mother-in-law, the
+presiding genius of it all, the unknown quantity in the equation of my
+married life, now begun amid the felicitations, more or less sincere, of
+a host of kissing, hand-shaking, smiling, chattering, good-natured
+aunts, uncles, cousins, and relatives of all degrees.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+MOUNTAINS AND MORE MOTHER-IN-LAW.
+
+
+So the bells were rung, metaphorically speaking, and we were wed. I had
+a long leave of absence from the banking-house in which I held a
+responsible and confidential position, and we started for the mountains,
+leaving mamma Pinkerton to put things to rights and follow us in a
+fortnight, when we had decided to settle down for a month's quiet stay
+in a picturesque town of the mountain region. Oh, the unrestrained joy
+of that fortnight! Everybody at the hotels seemed to know by instinct
+that we were a newly-married pair, and knowing glances passed between
+them. But what did we care? With pride and a conscious embarrassment
+that made my hand tremble, I wrote on the registers in a bold hand
+"Charles Travers and wife." I asked for the best room with a pleasant
+out-look. The smiling clerk, trained to dissimulation, would appear as
+unconscious as the blank safe behind him, but he knew all the while, the
+sly rascal, that we were on a wedding trip, and he paid special
+attention to our comfort. We saw the glories and wonders of the
+mountains, and shared their inspiration as with a single heart. We rose
+early to drink the clear air and greet the rising sun together. We
+strolled out in the evening to romantic spots, and there, with arms
+around each other, as we walked or stood gazing on the scene and
+listening to the rustling breeze, we were happy. For two weeks our lives
+blended with each other and with nature, and it was with a sigh that we
+mounted the lumbering stage to take up our sojourn in the retired town
+on the hills. We came to the little hotel just at night, and were stared
+at and commented upon by those who had been there three days and assumed
+the air of having had possession for years. We were tired, and kept
+aloof that evening, and the next day mother-in-law arrived.
+
+As she dismounted from the coach, she gave the driver a severe warning
+to be careful of her trunk, an iron-bound treasure that would have
+defied the efforts of the most determined baggage-smasher. Bessie had
+flown to meet her, and their greeting was affectionate; but to me the
+old lady presented a hand encased in a mitt, or sort of glove with
+amputated fingers, and gave me a stately, "I hope you are well, sir,"
+that rather made me feel sick. She looked full at me in her steady and
+commanding way, as much as to say, "Well, you have committed no
+atrocious crime yet, I suppose; but I am rather surprised at it."
+
+If there is anything I pride myself on, it is self-possession and a
+willingness to face anybody and give as good as I get, but that
+magnificently imperious way of looking with those large eyes always
+disconcerted me. I could not brace myself enough to meet them with any
+show of impudence, though the old lady had not ceased to regard that as
+the chief trait of my character. As Mrs. Pinkerton trod with stately
+step the rude piazza of that summer hotel, she put her eye-glasses on
+and surveyed its occupants with a look that made them shrink into
+themselves and feel ashamed to be sitting about in that idle way. I
+believe the old lady's eyesight was good enough, and that she used her
+glasses, with their gold bows and the slender chain with which they were
+suspended about her neck, for effect. I noticed that if they were not on
+she always put them on to look at anything, and if they happened to be
+on she took them off for the same purpose.
+
+"Well," she said, going into the little parlor, and looking from the
+windows, "this really seems to be a fine situation. The view of the
+mountains is quite grand."
+
+"Very kind of you to approve of the mountains, but you could give them
+points on grandeur," I thought; but I merely remarked, "We find it quite
+pleasant here."
+
+She turned and glanced at me without reply, as much as to say, "Who
+addressed you, sir? You would do well to speak when you are spoken to."
+I was abashed, but was determined to do the agreeable so far as I could,
+in spite of the rebuke of those eyes.
+
+"The house doesn't seem to me to be very attractive," she continued,
+glancing around with a gaze that took in everything through all the
+partition walls, and assuming a tone that meant, "I am speaking to you,
+Bessie, and no one else." "What sort of people are there here?"
+
+"Oh, some very pleasant people, I should judge," said Bessie, "but we
+have been here only one day, you know, and have made no acquaintances to
+speak of. Charlie's friend, Fred Marston, from the city, is here with
+his wife; and I met a young lady to whom I took quite a fancy this
+morning, a Miss Van Duzen. She is quite wealthy, and an orphan, and is
+here with her uncle, a fine-looking gentleman, who is president of a
+bank, or an insurance company, or some thing of the sort. You saw him, I
+think, on the piazza,--the large man, with gray side-whiskers, white
+vest, and heavy gold chain."
+
+"Yes, I noticed him. A pompous-looking old gentleman, isn't he?"
+
+"Oh, he is dignified in his manner, but not at all pompous," was the
+reply.
+
+"Well, I call him pompous, if looks mean anything," said the mother,
+with the air of one to whom looks were quite sufficient. "I think I will
+go to my room," she added, and turned a glance on me, as much as to say,
+"You needn't come, sir." I had no intention of going, and wandered out
+on the piazza, feeling as though Bessie had almost been taken away from
+me again.
+
+When she rejoined me, leaving her mother above stairs, I asked, "What
+does she think of her room?"
+
+"Well, it doesn't quite suit her. She thinks the furniture scanty and
+shabby, water scarce, towels rather coarse, and she can't endure the
+sight of a kerosene lamp; but she will make herself quite comfortable, I
+dare say."
+
+"And everybody else uncomfortable," I felt like adding, but restrained
+myself.
+
+She came down to tea, and being offered a seat on the other side of me
+from Bessie, firmly declined it, and took the one on the other side of
+her daughter from me. As she unfolded her napkin she took in the whole
+table with a searching glance, and had formed a quick estimate of
+everybody sitting around it. Miss Clara Van Duzen and Mr. Desmond, her
+uncle, sat opposite, and an introduction across the table took place.
+The young lady was vivacious and talkative, and tried to make herself
+agreeable, but my mother-in-law did not like what she afterwards called
+her "chatter," and set her down as a frivolous young person. "Miss Van,"
+as everybody called her, with her own approval,--for, as she said, she
+detested the Duzen which her Dutch ancestors had bequeathed her with
+their other property,--was of New York Knickerbocker origin, now living
+with her uncle in Boston, and was by no means frivolous, though
+uncommonly lively. She had fine, brown eyes, beautiful hair, and a
+complexion that defied sun and wind. It had the rosy glow of health, and
+indicated a good digestion and high spirits. Mr. Desmond seemed to be
+mostly white vest, immaculate shirt-front, and gold chain, the
+last-named article being very heavy and meandering through the
+button-holes of his vest and up around his invisible neck. He said
+little, and was evidently not much given to light conversation. He was
+very gracious in his attentions to the ladies, however, and seemed to
+pay special deference to Mrs. Pinkerton. I afterwards learned that he
+was a widower of long standing, without chick or child, and the guardian
+of his niece, whom he regarded with great admiration.
+
+Down at the other end of the table was Marston, evidently giving vent
+to his impatience about something, and his wife, with fierce eyes,
+telling him, in manner if not in words, not to make a fool of himself.
+The rest of the company was made up either of transient visitors or of
+persons with whom this story has nothing in particular to do.
+
+As we emerged on the piazza after tea, Fred, who had impolitely gone out
+in advance, called out, "Charlie, old boy, come over here and have a
+smoke!"
+
+I must confess that these long sittings on the piazzas of summer hotels
+had lured me back to my old habits, which I had forsworn in my efforts
+to conciliate Bessie's mother. Bessie had encouraged me in it, for to
+tell the truth she rather liked the fragrance of a good cigar, and
+dearly loved to see me enjoying it. It was my nature to defy the whole
+world and be master of my own habits, but I had felt a mean inclination,
+after mother-in-law joined the party, to slink away and smoke on the
+sly. There was nothing for it now, however, but to put on a bold face,
+or play the hypocrite and pretend I didn't smoke. The latter I would
+not do, and if I had attempted it, it wouldn't go down with Fred, and I
+should have been in a worse predicament than ever. I went boldly across
+the piazza and took the proffered cigar. Glancing out at the corner of
+my eye as I was lighting it, I saw my mother-in-law regarding me through
+her glasses with increased disfavor. She did not, however, seem to be
+surprised, and doubtless believed me capable of any perfidy.
+
+"I say, Charlie, old boy, let's have a game of billiards," said Fred,
+after a few puffs. "I'll give you twenty points and beat you out of your
+boots." Now I was very fond of billiards, and usually didn't care who
+knew it, but Mrs. Pinkerton did not approve of the game, and had no
+knowledge that I indulged in it. But Fred would speak in that absurd
+shouting way of his, and all the ladies heard him. Again I mustered up
+resolution and went into the billiard room, but I played very
+indifferently, and was thinking all the time of my mother-in-law and her
+opinion of me. I really wanted to get into her good graces, but it
+required the sacrifice of all my own inclinations, and I despised a man
+who deliberately played the hypocrite to win anybody's favor.
+
+After two or three listless games I said to Fred, "I guess I will join
+the ladies." I was feeling some qualms of conscience for staying away
+from Bessie a whole hour at once.
+
+"Oh, hang the ladies!" was Fred's graceless response; "they can take
+care of themselves. My wife gets along well enough without me, I know,
+and yours will soon learn to be quite comfortable without your guardian
+presence; besides she's got her mother now. By the way, what a mighty
+grand old dowager Mrs. Pink is!"
+
+"Pinkerton is her name," I said, a little haughtily, as if resenting the
+liberty he took with my mother-in-law's cognomen.
+
+"Oh, yes, I know, but the name is too long; and besides, she reminds one
+of a full-blown pink, a little on the fade, perhaps, but still with a
+good deal of bloom about her. Is she going to live with you? Precious
+fine time you will have!" he added, having received his answer by a nod.
+"She'll boss the shebang, you bet!"
+
+"Oh, I guess not," I answered, not liking his slangy way of talking
+about my affairs, and resolving in my own mind that I would be master in
+my own house.
+
+"Well, then there'll be a fine old tussle for supremacy, and don't you
+forget it!"
+
+With this remark Fred wandered off down the dusty road, humming Madame
+Angot, and I drew up a chair by Bessie's side. She had evidently been
+wishing I would come. Mr. Desmond was sitting a little apart from the
+rest, twisting his fingers in his watch-chain and looking intently at
+the mountain-top opposite, as if expecting somebody to come over with a
+dispatch for him. Mrs. Pinkerton sat by her daughter's side in calm
+grandeur, her gray puffs--that fine silver-gray that comes prematurely
+on aristocratic brows--seeming like appendages of a queenly diadem. Miss
+Van had been diverting the company with a lively account of her day's
+adventures. She was always having adventures, and had a faculty of
+relating them that was little short of genius.
+
+"Well, my dear, are you having a good time?" I murmured in Bessie's ear.
+
+"Oh, yes; but I was feeling a little lonesome without you."
+
+The conversation degenerated into commonplace about the scenery and
+points of interest in the neighborhood, and after a while the company
+dispersed with polite good-evenings.
+
+When we reached our room, I remarked to Bessie, who seemed more quiet
+than usual, "I hope your mother will like it here."
+
+"Oh, yes, I guess she will like it when she has been here a little
+while," was the answer. "You know she has not been away from home much,
+of late years, except to the seaside with the Watsons and other of her
+old friends, and she does not adapt herself readily to strange company."
+
+I said nothing more, but was absorbed in thought about my mother-in-law.
+It is evident by this time that she was no ordinary woman, no coarse or
+waspish mother-in-law, but a woman of good breeding and the highest
+character. She was intelligent and well-informed, a consistent member of
+the Episcopal Church, with the highest views of propriety and a
+reverential regard for the rules of conduct laid down by good society.
+This made her all the harder to deal with. If she were a common or
+vulgar sort of mother-in-law, I could assert my prerogatives without
+compunction; and I was forced to admit that she was a very worthy woman,
+and not given to petty meddling, but I felt that her presence was an
+awful restraint. Without her we could have such good times, going and
+coming as we pleased, and acting with entire freedom; but she must be
+counted in, and was a factor that materially affected the result. She
+could not be ignored; her opinions could not be disregarded. That would
+be rude, and besides, their influence would make itself felt. Strange,
+the irresistible effect of a presence upon one! She might not openly
+interfere or directly oppose, but there she was, and she didn't approve
+of me or like my friends, could not fall in with my ways or my wishes,
+and make one of any company in which I should feel at ease, and I knew
+that her presence would be depressing, and spoil our summer's pleasure;
+and after that was over and we were at home, what? Well, sufficient unto
+the day is the evil thereof. We slept the sound sleep that mountain and
+country quiet brings, and took the chances of the future.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+THE RISE AND FALL.
+
+
+During the next week of our stay at the Fairview hotel, it grew rather
+dull. There was little to do but drive on the long country roads, or
+wander over the hills and in the fields and woods. I could have found
+plenty of pleasure in that with Bessie and a party of congenial friends,
+but it didn't seem to be right always to leave my worthy mother-in-law
+behind, with her crochet work or the last new novel from the city, on
+the sunny piazza or in her dim little chamber. She was not averse to
+drives, in fact enjoyed them very much, but she seemed to divine that I
+did not really want her company, though I protested, as became a dutiful
+son-in-law, that I should be very glad to take her at any time. She did
+go with us once or twice, but the laughter and romping behavior which
+gave our rides their chief zest were extinguished, and we jogged along
+in the most proper manner, professing admiration for the outlines of the
+hills and the far-away stretches of scenery between the more distant
+mountains. We returned as quiet and demure as if we had been to a
+funeral. Mrs. Pinkerton saw the effect, and with her fine feeling of
+independence, she politely but firmly declined to go afterwards. As for
+walking on anything but level sidewalks or gravel-paths, she could not
+think of such a thing. The idea of her climbing a hill or getting
+herself over a fence seemed ridiculous to anybody that knew her.
+
+So it was that we were continually forced to leave her behind, or deny
+ourselves the chief recreation of the country. I was sincerely
+disinclined to slight her in any way, and desirous of contributing to
+her pleasure, but what could I do? A fellow can't get an iceberg to
+enjoy tropical sunshine. Our dislike to leave the old lady alone,
+although she insisted that she didn't mind it at all, led us to pass a
+large portion of each day, sometimes all day, about the house. It was
+"deuced stupid," to use Marston's elegant phrase, but there was little
+to do for it. To be sure, there was Desmond, "old Dives," Fred called
+him. He seldom went out of sight of the house, but he had a perfect
+mail-bag of newspapers and letters every morning, and spent the forenoon
+indoors, holding sweet communion with them and answering his
+correspondents. In the afternoon he sat on the piazza by the hour,
+contemplating the mountain-top that had such a fascination for him. He
+had a prodigious amount of information on all manner of subjects, and a
+quick and accurate judgment; but he was generally very reticent, as he
+tipped back in his chair and twisted his fingers in and out of that fine
+gold chain. My mother-in-law, from her shady nook of the piazza, would
+glance at him occasionally from her work or her book, as much as to say,
+"It is strange people can't make some effort to be agreeable, instead of
+being so stiff and dignified all the afternoon"; but he seemed
+unconscious of her looks and her mental comments. His thoughts were
+probably in the marts of trade.
+
+Fred was continually going off to distant towns, or down to the great
+hotels in the mountains, for livelier diversion. His wife often insisted
+on going with him, to his evident disgust, not because she cared to be
+in his company, but because she wanted to go to the same places and
+could not well go alone. Now, Fred wasn't a bad fellow at heart. I had
+known him for years, and used to like him exceedingly. But he was left
+without a father at an early age, with a considerable fortune, and his
+mother was indulgent and not overwise. He got rather fast as he grew up,
+and then he contracted a thoughtless marriage with Lizzie Carleton, a
+handsome and stylish young lady, fond of dress and gay society, and
+without a notion of domestic responsibility or duty. Like most women who
+are not positively bad, she had in her heart a desire to be right, but
+she didn't know how. She was all impulse, and gave way to whims and
+feelings, as if helpless in any effort to manage her own waywardness. As
+a natural consequence there were constant jars between the pair. Fred
+took to his clubs and mingled with men of the race-course and the
+billiard halls, and Lizzie beguiled herself as best she could with her
+fashionable friends.
+
+And where was Miss Van Duzen these long and tedious days? They were
+never tedious to her, for she was always on the go. She would go off
+alone on interminable strolls, and bring back loads of flowers and
+strange plants, and she could tell all about them too. Her knowledge of
+botany was wonderful, and she could make very clever sketches; she would
+sit by the hour on some lonely rock, putting picturesque scenery on
+paper, just for the love of it; for when the pictures were done she
+would give them away or throw them away without the least compunction.
+She had a fine sense of the ludicrous and was all the time seeing funny
+things, which she described in a manner quite inimitable. She had grown
+up in New York, before her father's death, in the most select of
+Knickerbocker circles, but there was not a trace of aristocracy in her
+ways. She was sociable with the ostler and the office-boy, and agreeable
+to the neighboring farmers, talking with them with a spirit that quite
+delighted them. And yet there was nothing free and easy in her ways that
+encouraged undue familiarity. It was merely natural ease and good
+nature. She inspired respect in everybody but my mother-in-law, who was
+puzzled with her conduct, so different from her own ideas of propriety,
+and yet so free from real vulgarity. Mrs. Pinkerton could by no means
+approve of her, and yet she could accuse her of no offence which the
+most rigid could seriously censure.
+
+Miss Van was the life of the company when she was about, telling of her
+adventures, getting up impromptu amusements in the parlor, and planning
+excursions. She was the only person in the world, probably, who was
+quite familiar with Mr. Desmond, and she would sit on his knee, pull his
+whiskers, and call him an "awful glum old fogy," whereat he would laugh
+and say she had gayety enough for them both. He admired and loved her
+for the very qualities that he lacked.
+
+All this while I was trying to win the gracious favor of my
+mother-in-law, but it was up-hill work. She would answer me with severe
+politeness, and volunteer an occasional remark intended to be pleasant,
+but the moment I seemed to be gaining headway, a turn at billiards with
+Marston, for whom she had a great aversion, a thoughtless expression
+with a flavor of profanity in it, or my cigars, which I now indulged in
+without restraint, brought back her freezing air of disapproval.
+
+"Oh, dear!" I yawned sometimes, "why can't I go ahead and enjoy myself
+without minding that very respectable and severe old woman?" But I
+couldn't do it. I was always feeling the influence of those eyes, and
+even of her thoughts. I couldn't get away from it. Sunday came, and Mrs.
+Pinkerton expressed the hope that we were to attend divine service
+together. I hadn't thought of it till that moment, and then it struck me
+as a terrible bore. There was no church within ten miles except a little
+white, meek edifice in the neighboring village, occupied alternately by
+Methodist and Baptist expounders of a very Calvinistic, and, to me, a
+very unattractive sort of religion. It was not altogether to my
+mother-in-law's liking, but she regarded any church as far better than
+none.
+
+"I presume you will go, sir," she said, addressing me when I made no
+reply to the previous hint. She always used "sir," with a peculiar
+emphasis, when any suggestion was intended to have the force of a
+command.
+
+"Well, really, I had not thought about it," I said, rather vexed, as I
+secretly made up my mind, reckless of my policy of conciliation, that I
+would not go at any price. A tedious, droning sermon of an hour and
+perhaps an hour and a half in a country church, full of dismal
+doctrines,--the sermon, not the church,--I couldn't stand, I thought.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton's eyes were upon me, waiting for a more definite answer.
+"I--well, no, I don't think I really feel like it this morning. I
+thought I would read to Bessie quietly in our room, and take a rest."
+
+"Very well, sir," she said, "Bessie and I will walk down to the
+village."
+
+"The deuce you will!" I thought; "walk a mile and a half on a dusty
+road; to be bored!" I knew it was useless to protest, and I was too
+wilful to take back what I had said, have the team harnessed, and go,
+like a good fellow, to church. "No, I'll be blowed if I do!" I muttered.
+
+So off went the widow and her daughter without me. Bessie tripped around
+to me on the piazza, looking like a fairy in her white dress and bit of
+blue ribbon, gave me a sweet kiss, and said, "I'll be back before
+dinner. Have a nice quiet time, now."
+
+"Oh, yes; have a nice quiet time, and you gone off with that old
+dragon!" It was a wicked thought, for she was not a bit of a dragon, but
+the feeling came over me that I was going to feel miserable all the
+forenoon, and so I did. Miss Van and her uncle had gone early to the
+neighboring town, the largest in the county, for church and the
+opportunity of observing; Fred and his wife had gone, the night before,
+round to the other side of the mountains, where there was to be a sort
+of ball or hop at the leading hotel; and the rest of the people in the
+house might as well have been in the moon, for all that I cared about
+them. A nice quiet time! Oh, yes; lounging about and trying to think of
+something besides Mrs. Pinkerton and my own shabby behavior. I would ten
+times rather have been in the dullest country church that ever echoed to
+the voice of the old and unimproved theology of Calvin's day. But I was
+in for it, and lay in the hammock and looked through the stables, tried
+to read, tried to sleep, started on a walk and came back, and almost
+cursed the quiet country Sunday, as specially calculated to make a man
+of sense feel wretched.
+
+At last Bessie and her mother returned, and we had dinner. In the
+afternoon I was an outcast from Mrs. Pinkerton's favor, but I had Bessie
+and read to her, and, on the whole, got through the rest of the day
+comfortably.
+
+The week following I began to feel that this was getting tiresome. Under
+other circumstances it might be very pleasant, but really I began to
+doubt whether I was enjoying it. But I made up my mind that during these
+days of leisure I ought to be making progress in the favor of my
+mother-in-law, with whom I was destined to live, nobody could say how
+many years. I couldn't and wouldn't make a martyr or a hypocrite of
+myself. I wouldn't conceal my actions or deny myself freedom. So I
+smoked with Fred, played billiards, rolled ten-pins with Fred's wife and
+Miss Van, and even beguiled Bessie into that vigorous and healthful
+exercise, which brought a gentle reprimand from her mother, addressed to
+her but directed at me. She did not think that kind of amusement
+becoming to ladies who had a proper respect for themselves.
+
+"Why, mamma, Miss Van Duzen plays, and says she thinks it jolly fun,"
+said Bessie innocently.
+
+"That doesn't alter the case in the least," was the rejoinder. "Miss Van
+Duzen can judge for herself. I don't think it proper. Besides, your
+husband's familiar way with those ladies--one of whom is married and no
+better than she ought to be, if appearances mean anything--does not
+please me at all."
+
+"O mamma, how absurd! I see no harm in it at all, and poor Lizzie, I am
+sure, never means any harm."
+
+"Well, well, my dear, I don't wish to say anything about other people,
+and I only hope you will never have occasion to see any harm in your
+husband's evident preference for the company of people with loose
+notions about proper and becoming behavior."
+
+On Saturday of that week a little incident occurred that raised me
+perceptibly in Mrs. Pinkerton's estimation. The great, lumbering
+stage-coach came up just at evening, more heavily laden than usual, and
+top-heavy with trunks piled up on the roof. The driver dashed along with
+his customary recklessness, the six horses breaking into a canter as
+they turned to come up the rather steep acclivity to the house. The
+coach was drawn about a foot from its usual rut, one of the wheels
+struck a projecting stone, and over went the huge vehicle, passengers,
+trunks, and all. The driver took a terrible leap and was stunned. The
+horses stopped and looked calmly around on the havoc. There was great
+consternation in and about the house. Here my natural self-possession
+came into full play. I took command of the situation at once, directed
+prompt and vigorous efforts to the extrication of the passengers, had
+the injured ones taken into the house, applied proper restoratives, and
+in a few minutes ascertained that only one was seriously hurt. She was a
+young girl, who had insisted on riding outside, higher up even than the
+driver. She had been thrown headlong, striking, fortunately, on the
+grass, but terribly bruising one side of her face and dislocating her
+left shoulder. In a trice I had made her as comfortable as possible;
+dashed down to the village for the nearest doctor, having had the
+forethought to order a team harnessed in anticipation of such a
+necessity; and, having started the doctor up in a hurry, kept on to the
+neighboring county town for a surgeon who had considerable local
+reputation. I had him on the ground in a surprisingly short time, and
+before bedtime the unfortunate girl was put in the way of recovery,
+having received no internal injury.
+
+My behavior in this affair, as I said, gave me a lift in my
+mother-in-law's estimation, and of course filled Bessie with the most
+unbounded admiration, though I had never thought of the moral effect of
+my action. In the morning I determined to follow up my advantage. It was
+Sunday again, and I bespoke the team early, to go to the neighboring
+town, where there was an Episcopal church, and where, for that day, a
+distinguished divine from the city, who was spending his vacation in
+those parts, was to hold forth. When I had announced my preparation for
+the religious observance of the day, I actually received what was
+almost a smile of approval from my mother-in-law. I enjoyed the ride,
+and was not greatly bored by the service, for I was thinking of
+something else most of the time, or amusing my mind with the native
+congregation. We got back late to dinner, and the rest had left the
+dining-room. The ladies went in without removing their bonnets, and
+after dinner retired to their rooms.
+
+As I came out on the piazza, Fred, who was walking about in a restless
+way, puffing his cigar with a sort of ferocity, as though determined to
+put it through as speedily as possible, shouted, "Hello! Charlie, old
+boy, where the eternal furies have you been? Here I have been about this
+dead, sleepy, stupid place all the morning, with nothing to do and
+nobody to speak to!"
+
+"Why, where's Mrs. M.?"
+
+"Lib? Oh, she's been here, but then she was reading a ghastly stupid
+novel, and wasn't company; and she went off to the big boarding-house
+down the road half a mile, to dine with a friend. I wouldn't go to the
+blasted place, and really think she didn't want me to. But where in
+thunder were you all the while?"
+
+"At church, to be sure, with my wife and her mother."
+
+"Oh, yes!" was the reply, peculiarly prolonged, as if the idea never
+occurred to him before. "How long since you became so pious, old man?
+Didn't suppose you knew what the inside of a church was used for. The
+outside is mainly useful to put a clock on, where it can be seen. Old
+Pink,--beg pardon! Mrs. Pinkerton,--I suppose, dragged you along by main
+force."
+
+"Not at all. I went of my own motion; in fact, suggested it to the
+ladies."
+
+"You don't say so! Well, I see she is bringing you around. It is she
+that is destined to gain the supremacy."
+
+"Pshaw! Is my going to church such an indication of submission? It
+wouldn't do you any harm to go to church once in a while, Fred."
+
+"Well, I don't know about that," he said, taking out his cigar, and
+stretching his feet to the top of the balustrade; "I don't know about
+that. I am afraid it might be the ruin of me. I might become awfully
+pious, and then what a stick and a moping man of rags I should become. I
+tell you, Charlie, my boy, there's many a good fellow spoilt by too
+much church and Sunday school."
+
+"Perhaps," I replied, "but you and I are beyond danger."
+
+"Well, yes, but you can't be too careful of yourself, you know."
+
+There was no answering that, and we relapsed into commonplace, and
+finished our cigars.
+
+"Where's old Dives to-day, and his charming niece, the lively Van?"
+asked Fred, after an uncommon fit of silent contemplation.
+
+"They went over to some town thirty or forty miles away, yesterday, and
+haven't got back," I replied.
+
+"I tell you, that girl knows how to circumvent these stupid Sundays,
+don't she, though? And she takes old Dives along wherever she wants to
+go. I believe she would take him where the other Dives went, if she was
+disposed to take a trip there herself. But, holy Jerusalem! what are we
+to do to get through the rest of the day. No company, no billiards, no
+fishing. Confound the prejudices of society. I tell you, it is just such
+women as that mother-in-law of yours that keep society intimidated, as
+it were, into artificial proprieties. Now where's the harm of a pleasant
+game on a Sunday, more than sitting here and grumbling and cursing
+because there's nothing to do?"
+
+I made no reply, and Fred lighted another cigar. He was evidently
+thinking of something. "Look here, old fellow," he said at length in an
+undertone, something very unusual with him, "come up to my room. You
+haven't seen it. Lib won't be back till teatime, and perhaps we can find
+something to amuse ourselves."
+
+He led the way and I followed, thinking no harm. His room was up stairs
+and on the back of the house, looking up the great hill that stretched
+back to the clouds. As we entered, I found he had brought a good many
+things with him, and given the room much the air of the quarters of a
+bachelor in the city. His sleeping-room was separate from that, and
+formed a sort of boudoir for his wife. He motioned me to an easy-chair,
+set a box of fine cigars on the table, and going to the closet brought
+out a decanter of sherry and some glasses.
+
+"In these cursed places, you can get nothing to drink," he said,
+"unless on the sly, and I hate that; so I bring along my own beverages,
+you see."
+
+I saw and tasted, and found it very good. He was still fumbling about
+the closet, with profane ejaculations, and finally emerged with
+something in his hand that I at first took for a small book. But he
+unblushingly put on the table that pasteboard volume sometimes called
+the Devil's Bible. "Come," he said, "where's the harm? Let us have a
+quiet game of Casino or California Jack, or something else. It is better
+than perishing of stupidity."
+
+I demurred. I was not over-scrupulous, but I had sufficient of my early
+breeding left to have a qualm of conscience at the thought of playing
+cards on Sunday.
+
+"Oh, nonsense!" said Fred, carelessly, as he proceeded to deal the cards
+for Casino. "There, you have an ace and little Casino right before you.
+Go ahead, old man!"
+
+I made a feeble show of protesting, but took up my cards, and, finding
+that I could capture the ace and little Casino, took them. From that the
+play went on; I became quite absorbed, and dismissed my scruples, when,
+as the sun was getting low, a shadow passed the window.
+
+"Great Jupiter!" I exclaimed, looking up. "Does that second-story piazza
+go all the way round here?"
+
+"To be sure," answered Fred, whose back was to the window. "Why not?
+What did you see,--a spook?"
+
+"My mother-in-law!"
+
+"The devil!"
+
+"No, Mrs. Pinkerton!"
+
+"Well, what do you care? You are your own boss, I hope."
+
+"Yes, of course; but she will be terribly offended, and I think it would
+be pleasanter for all concerned to keep in her good graces."
+
+"Gammon! Assert your rights, be master of yourself, and teach the old
+woman her place. D---- me, if I would have a mother-in-law riding over
+me, or prying around to see what I was about!"
+
+"Oh, I am sure she passed the window by accident. She would never pry
+around; it isn't her style; she has a fine sense of propriety, has my
+mother-in-law!"
+
+"Oh, yes, old Pink is the pink of propriety, no doubt about that!" said
+the rascal, laughing heartily at his heartless pun.
+
+But I couldn't laugh. I saw plainly enough that I had lost more than all
+the ground that I had gained in my mother-in-law's favor, and my task
+would be harder than ever. I had no more desire to play cards, and
+sauntered down stairs and out of doors as if nothing had happened. At
+the tea-table Mrs. Pinkerton was very impressive in her manner, but
+showed no direct consciousness of anything new. On the piazza, after
+tea, she was uncommonly affable to her daughter, and, I thought, a
+little disposed to keep Bessie from talking to me. The latter appeared
+troubled somewhat, and looked at me in an anxious way, as if longing to
+rush into my arms and ask me all about it and say how willingly she
+forgave me; but her mother kept her within the circle of her influence,
+and I sat apart, harboring unutterable thoughts and saying nothing. At
+last Mrs. Pinkerton arose, and said sweetly, "I wouldn't stay out any
+later, dear, it is rather damp."
+
+"Stay with me, Bessie," I said, "I want to speak to you. Your mother is
+at liberty to go in whenever she pleases." It was then she gave me a
+disdainful look and swept in, and I muttered the wish regarding her
+transportation to a distant clime, which brought out the gentle rebuke
+with which this story opens.
+
+I saw no prospect of enjoying a longer stay at the Fairview, unless some
+burglary or terrible accident should occur to give me chance for a new
+display of my heroic qualities, and even then, I thought, it would be of
+no use, for I should spoil it all next day. So we determined to go home
+a week earlier than we had intended. The Marstons were going to Canada
+and Lake George, and wouldn't reach home till October. Mr. Desmond and
+his niece stayed a month longer where they were, and that would bring
+them home about the same time. Bessie and I went home with a lack of
+that buoyant bliss with which we had travelled to the mountains and
+spent those first two weeks. There was no change in us, but it was all
+due to my mother-in-law.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+WHAT IS HOME WITHOUT A MOTHER-IN-LAW?
+
+
+Home! We were back from the mountains, and our brief wedding-journey had
+become a thing of the past. Mrs. Pinkerton's iron-bound trunk had been
+reluctantly deposited in her bed-chamber by a puffing and surly
+hack-driver; and here was I, installed in the little cottage as head of
+the household, for weal or for woe. It was Mrs. Pinkerton's cottage, to
+be sure, but I entered it with the determination not to live there as a
+boarder or as a guest subject to the proprietor's condescending
+hospitality. I was able and not unwilling to establish a home of my own,
+and inasmuch as I refrained from doing so because of Mrs. Pinkerton's
+desire to keep her daughter with her, I had the right to consider myself
+under no obligation to my mother-in-law.
+
+The cottage was far from being a disagreeable place in itself. It was
+small, but extremely neat and pleasant. The rooms were furnished with a
+degree of quiet taste that defied criticism. The hand of an accomplished
+housekeeper was everywhere made manifest, and everything had an air of
+refinement and comfort. There was no ostentatious furniture; the chairs
+were made to sit in, but not to put one's boots on. The cleanliness of
+the house was terrible. One could see that no man had lived there since
+the death of the late Pinkerton.
+
+Our room was the same that had been occupied by Bessie since she was a
+school-girl in short frocks. It was full of Bessie's "things," and it
+was lucky that my effects occupied but very little space.
+
+"This is jolly," I said, as I sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled
+a cigar from my pocket. "How soon will supper be ready, I wonder?"
+
+There was no response. Bessie was unpacking,--and such an unpacking!
+
+I lighted my cigar and threw myself back on the bed, wondering how they
+had got on without me at the bank. Presently in came mother-in-law to
+lend a hand at the unpacking. She did not see me at first, but the
+fragrance of my Manila soon reached her nostrils, and she turned.
+
+Such a look as she cast upon me! It almost took my breath away. But she
+did not say a word. "The subject is beyond her powers of speech," I said
+to myself. "Let us hope it will be so as a general thing."
+
+However, it made me feel uncomfortable, so by and by I got off the bed
+and went down stairs.
+
+At the supper-table I tried to make myself as agreeable as possible. I
+talked over the trip, and spoke of the people we had met at the
+mountains; but I had most of the conversation to myself. Bessie did not
+seem to be in a mood to chat; Mrs. Pinkerton devoted herself to impaling
+me with her eyes once in a while; in a word, the mental atmosphere was
+muggy.
+
+"Desmond has travelled a great deal," I said. "I was speaking of French
+politics the other day, and he gave me a long harangue on the situation.
+He was in Paris several years, when he was a good deal younger than he
+is now."
+
+"Mr. Desmond is not a very old man," said Mrs. Pinkerton, "but he has
+passed that age when men think they know all there is to be known."
+
+I accepted this shot good-naturedly, and laughed.
+
+"His niece is a remarkably bright girl," I continued. "Don't you think
+so?"
+
+"I cannot say I think it either bright or proper for a young lady to go
+off alone on mountain excursions for half a day, and return with her
+dress torn and her hands all scratched."
+
+"Well, it was rather imprudent, but you know she said she had no
+intention of going so far when she started, and she missed her way."
+
+"I did not hear her excuses. She appeared to be a spoiled child, and her
+manners were insufferably offensive. I should have known she came from
+New York, even if I had not been told."
+
+"Do you think all New-Yorkers are loud?"
+
+"I said no such thing. There is a class of New York young people who are
+so 'loud' that respectable people cannot have anything to do with them
+without lowering themselves. Miss Van Duzen belongs to that class."
+
+"You are rough on her, upon my word. I don't think she's half so bad,
+do you, Bessie?"
+
+"I liked her very much," said Bessie. "She may not be our style exactly,
+but I think at heart she is a good, true girl."
+
+"I wonder if she will call," I said. "By the way, Fred Marston is coming
+out to see us as soon as he gets back to the city."
+
+"As to that young man," Mrs. Pinkerton remarked, with some show of
+vivacity, "he impressed me as being little less than disreputable."
+
+"Disreputable! I would have you understand that Fred Marston is one of
+my friends," I exclaimed, growing angry, "and he is as respectable as
+the rector of St. Thomas's Church!"
+
+Phew! Now I had done it. Mrs. Pinkerton was thoroughly scandalized and
+offended. She got up, and we left the table, Bessie looking troubled. I
+went into the library, and after lighting a cigar, sat down to read the
+papers. Bessie, who had followed me, brushed the journal out of my hand
+and seated herself on my knee.
+
+"Charlie," she said, kissing me, and smoothing the hair away from my
+brow, "can't you and mamma ever get along any better than this?"
+
+"A conundrum! I never guessed one, so I shall have to give this up. But
+don't you see how it is, dearest? I try to be good to her, and she won't
+meet me half-way. On the contrary, she tries to nag me, I think. It
+wasn't my fault to-night. What right has she to run down my friends? If
+she don't like them, she might leave them alone, and be precious sure
+they'd leave her alone. She don't like smoking; I tried to swear off,
+tried mighty hard, but it was no use. You see--"
+
+"It wasn't quite necessary for you to make that remark about the Rev.
+Dr. McCanon, was it, Charlie?"
+
+"Well, no; I'm sorry, but she provoked me to it. I'll apologize."
+
+"And then, Charlie, you will try to be a little more patient with mamma,
+won't you?"
+
+"Yes, I do try, but the trouble is that she don't like me. Must I keep
+my mouth shut, throw away my cigars, bounce all my friends, and sit up
+with my arms folded?"
+
+"Oh, no, dear. Be good to her, and be patient; it will all come around
+right in time."
+
+That was Bessie's way of lightening present troubles,--"It will all come
+around right in time." Blessed hope! "Man never is, but always to be
+blest."
+
+My duties now kept me at the bank nearly all day, and for a few weeks
+affairs went on at home very smoothly. At table Mrs. Pinkerton
+maintained a sphinx-like silence, and I directed my conversation to
+Bessie. When the old lady opened her mouth, it was to snub me. The snub
+direct, the snub indirect, the snub implied, and the snub
+far-fetched,--I submitted to all with a cheerful spirit, and not a hasty
+retort escaped me.
+
+At Bessie's request, I now smoked only in the library, or in our own
+room. I bought a highly ornamental Japanese affair, of curious
+workmanship, as a receptacle for cigar-ashes. Altogether, I behaved like
+a good boy.
+
+One evening Marston dropped in. When his card was brought up stairs, I
+handed it over to Bessie, and hurried to the library.
+
+"How are you, old man?" he said, or, rather, shouted. "How do you like
+it, as far as you've got?"
+
+"Tip-top. I'm glad to see you. When did you get back?"
+
+"Last Saturday, and mighty glad to get back to a live place, too.
+Smoke?"
+
+"Thank you. Bessie will be down in a minute."
+
+"How's old Pink?"
+
+"S-s-h! She's all right. Don't speak so confoundedly loud."
+
+"Ha, ha! I see how it is. By and by you won't dare say your soul's your
+own. I pity you, Charlie, upon my word I do. Ned Tupney was married a
+few days ago, did you know it? and he's got a devil of a mother-in-law
+on his hands, a regular roarer--"
+
+"Here comes my wife," I broke in. "For Heaven's sake, change the
+subject. Talk about roses!"
+
+Bessie entered and exchanged a friendly greeting with Fred.
+
+"I was telling Charlie about some wonderful roses I saw at Primton's
+green-house," said the unabashed visitor, and he forthwith laid aside
+his cigar--on the tablecloth!--and launched into a glowing description
+of the imaginary flowers.
+
+Before he had finished, Mrs. Pinkerton entered much to my surprise. She
+bowed in a stately manner, inquired formally as to the state of Fred's
+health, and as she took a seat I saw her glance take in that cigar.
+
+Fred could talk exceedingly well when he was so disposed, and he
+entertained us excellently, I thought. He had seen a good deal of the
+world, was a close observer, and had the faculty of chatting in a
+fascinating way about subjects that would usually be called commonplace.
+He was pleased with the aspect of the cottage, and complimented it
+gracefully.
+
+"Love in a cottage," he sighed, casting a quick glance around the
+room,--"well, it isn't so bad after all, with plenty of books, a
+pleasant garden, sunny rooms, a pretty view, and a mother-in-law to look
+after a fellow and keep him straight." And the wretch looked at Mrs.
+Pinkerton, and laughed in a sociable way.
+
+I promptly called his attention to a beautiful edition of Thackeray's
+works in the bookcase, a recent purchase.
+
+In the course of a half-hour's call, Fred managed to introduce the
+dangerous topic at least a half-dozen times, and each time I was
+compelled to choke him off by ramming some other subject down his throat
+willy-nilly.
+
+Finally he rose to go. I accompanied him to the front door.
+
+"Sociable creature, old Pink, eh?" he said. "Doesn't love me too well.
+Is she always as festive and amusing as to-night?"
+
+"Hold on a minute," was my reply. I ran back and got my hat and cane,
+and accompanied him toward the railroad station.
+
+"See here, Fred," I said, "your intentions are good, but I wish you
+would quit talking about Mrs. Pinkerton. I am doing my best to live
+peaceably and comfortably in the same house with her, and you don't help
+me a bit with your gabble. She is a very worthy woman, and not half so
+stupid as you imagine. I admit that we don't get along together quite as
+I could wish, but I'm trying to please my wife by being as good a son
+as I can be to her mother. What's the use of trying to rile up our
+little puddle?"
+
+"Oh, all right!" he rejoined. "If you prefer your puddle should be
+stagnant--admirable metaphor, by the way--it shall be as you wish. Only
+I hate to see the way things are going with you, and I'm bound to tell
+you so. You are losing your spirit, tying your hands, and throwing all
+your manly independence to the winds. If you live two years with that
+irreproachable mummy, you won't be worth knowing. Do you dare go into
+town with me and have a game of billiards?"
+
+I went. We had several games. I got home about midnight. The next
+morning, at the breakfast-table, Mrs. Pinkerton said dryly,--
+
+"Your friend Marston pities you, doesn't he?"
+
+"I don't know; if he does, he wastes his emotions," I replied.
+
+"I am glad you think so. He takes a good deal of interest in your
+welfare, and I suppose he could be prevailed upon to give you wise
+advice in case of need."
+
+"I dare say. Fred is a good fellow, and advice is as cheap as dirt."
+
+"And pity?"
+
+"Pity! Why do you think Fred pities me? Why should he pity me?"
+
+"Your question is hypocritical, because you know very well that he
+thinks you are a victim,--a victim of a terrible mother-in-law."
+
+It was the first time she had ever spoken out so openly. I said,--
+
+"We will leave it to Bessie. Bessie, do I look like a victim?"
+
+"No," said Bessie, "but you are both the queerest puzzles! Mamma is
+always her dearest self when you are away, Charlie. You don't know each
+other at all yet. When you are together you are both horrid, and when
+you are apart you are both lovely. And yet I don't know why it should be
+so; there is no quarrel between you--and--and--"
+
+And Bessie began to cry. I got up.
+
+"No, there's no quarrel between us," I said; "but perhaps a straight-out
+row would be better than forever to be eating our own vitals with
+suppressed rancor."
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton made as if she would go around to where Bessie sat, to
+condole with her, without noticing my remark.
+
+"No, don't trouble yourself," I cried. "It's my place to comfort my
+wife." And I took Bessie in my arms tenderly, and kissed her
+tear-stained cheek almost fiercely.
+
+This theatrical demonstration caused my mother-in-law to sweep out of
+the room promptly, with her temper as nearly ruffled as I had ever seen
+it.
+
+"O Charlie!" whimpered my poor little wife despairingly, "what shall I
+do? It's awful to have you and mamma this way!"
+
+And now it was my turn to say, "Cheer up, my love! It will all come
+around right in time."
+
+But my _arriere pensee_ was, "Would that that burglar had bagged the old
+iceberg, and carried her off to her native Nova Zembla!"
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+MISS VAN'S PARTY AND ANOTHER UNPLEASANTNESS.
+
+
+One day in the early fall, Mrs. Pinkerton received a letter postmarked
+at Paris, which seemed to throw her into a state of extraordinary
+excitement. I knew her well enough to be certain that she would not tell
+me the news, but that I should hear it later through Bessie. Such was
+the case. When I came home towards evening and went up stairs to prepare
+for supper, Bessie, who was seated in our room, said in a joyful tone,--
+
+"George is coming home next month!"
+
+"That's good," I said; and the more I thought of it the better it
+seemed. A new element would be infused into our home life with his
+advent, and I confidently believed that the widow's society would be
+vastly more tolerable when he was among us. George had been so long in
+Paris that he had become a veritable Parisian. That he would bring
+along with him a large amount of Paris sunshine and vivacity to enliven
+the atmosphere of our little circle, I felt certain.
+
+"Is he coming to stay?" I asked.
+
+"He don't know. He says he never makes any plans for six months ahead.
+It will depend upon circumstances."
+
+"Well, that's Parisian. I'm very glad he's coming, and I hope
+circumstances will keep him here. Isn't old Dr. Jones pretty nearly
+dead? Seems to me George could take his practice."
+
+"Now, Charlie!"
+
+"It's all right, puss; doctors must die as well as their patients."
+
+I broached the subject to mother-in-law at the supper-table,
+and--_mirabile dictu!_--she agreed with me that we must keep George with
+us when we got him.
+
+In November George arrived. He didn't telegraph from New York, but came
+right on by a night train, and, walking into the house while we were at
+breakfast, took us by surprise.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton taken by surprise was a funny phenomenon, and I'm afraid
+propriety received a pretty smart blow when she threw her napkin into a
+plate of buckwheat cakes, dropped her eye-glasses, and rushed to meet
+the long-lost prodigal.
+
+As for George, he brought such a gale into the house with him--there are
+plenty of them on the Atlantic in November--that everything seemed
+metamorphosed. He laughed and shouted, and hugged first one of us and
+then another, and finally sat down and ate breakfast enough for six
+Frenchmen, every minute ripping out some wicked little French oath and
+winking at his mother with the utmost complacency. Never since I had
+become an inmate of the cottage had we enjoyed a meal so much as that
+one. There was an _abandon_, an _insouciance_, an _esprit_, a
+_je-ne-sais-quoi_ about this young frog-eater that thoroughly carried
+away the whole party, including even Mrs. Pinkerton.
+
+When George had eaten everything he could find on the table, he lighted
+a cigarette,--right there in the dining-room, too, and under his
+mother's eyes,--and we had a good, long, jolly talk together, Bessie
+sitting between us and feasting her eyes on her brother's comeliness.
+He certainly was handsome.
+
+"I have no plans," he said, "except to loaf here awhile and wait for an
+opening."
+
+"A French Micawber," said I. "And I suppose you know all about medicine
+and surgery?"
+
+"I have learned when not to give medicine, I believe, and so, I think, I
+can save lots of lives."
+
+A few days after George's arrival we received a call from the Watsons. I
+had never had the pleasure of meeting the Watsons, but I had had the
+Watsons held up before me as examples of the right sort of style so many
+times, that I felt already well acquainted with them.
+
+Mr. Watson was a very retiring, quiet little man, awed into obscurity by
+his wife. After a long and persistent effort to interest him in
+conversation, I was compelled to give it up, and to leave him smiling
+blankly, with his gaze directed toward the Argand burner.
+
+Mrs. Watson was immense in every sense of the word. Her moral and mental
+dimensions were awe-inspiring; and she delivered what I afterwards
+found, on reflection, to be very commonplace utterances in a style in
+which unction, dogmatism, self-satisfaction, and finality were
+predominant. Once, when she had brought forth an unusually imposing
+sentence, her husband fairly smacked his lips.
+
+The Watsons had no children. They were among the most prominent
+attendants of St. Thomas's, and the old gentleman was reputed to be
+worth about a million.
+
+George came in while the call was in progress, and after greeting the
+Watsons, he turned to Mrs. W., and uttered one of the most polished,
+delicate, pleasing little compliments it has ever been my fortune to
+hear uttered. Then he quietly withdrew into the background.
+
+Just then some more callers were announced, and what was my surprise to
+see Mr. Desmond and Miss Van Duzen enter. The former was as resplendent
+as to his watch-chain as ever, and his niece looked charming.
+Introductions all round followed, and the company broke up into groups.
+
+George took a seat near Miss Van, and a brisk fire of conversation was
+soon under way between them, varied by frequent bursts of friendly
+laughter.
+
+Mr. Desmond soon drew out Mr. Watson, and their talk was on stocks,
+bonds, and the like.
+
+After Mrs. Watson had proved her theory of the laws of the universe, and
+had almost intoxicated my worthy mother-in-law with her glittering
+rhetoric, the Watsons took their departure. Before the others followed
+their example, Miss Van extended an informal invitation to us to attend
+a "social gathering" at her uncle's residence the following Wednesday
+evening.
+
+We went, of course, Mrs. Pinkerton, George, Bessie, and I. It was a
+pleasant party, and it could not have been otherwise with Miss Van as
+the hostess. There was a little dancing,--not enough to entitle it to be
+called a dancing-party; a little card-playing,--not enough to make it a
+card-party; and there was a vast amount of bright and pleasant
+conversation, but still one could not name it a _converzatione_. The
+company was remarkably good, and Miss Van's management, although
+imperceptible, was so skilful that her guests found themselves at their
+ease, and enjoying themselves, without knowing that their pleasure was
+more than half due to her _finesse_.
+
+George was quite a lion, and I envied his easy tact, his unconscious
+grace of manner, and his faculty of saying bright things without effort.
+He and Miss Van got on famously together, and she found him an efficient
+and trustworthy aid in her capacity as hostess.
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton made a lovely wall-flower, and I could not refrain from a
+wicked chuckle when I saw her sitting on a sofa, exchanging commonplaces
+with a puffing dowager. Presently, however, I noticed that she had gone,
+and I found that Mr. Desmond had been kind enough to relieve me from the
+onerous duty of taking her down to supper.
+
+I wish I had a printed bill of fare of that supper, for even George,
+fresh from Vefour's and the Trois Freres Provencaux, acknowledged that
+it was sublime, magnificent, perfect. We men folks, in fact, talked so
+much about it afterwards, that Bessie rebuked us by remarking that "men
+didn't care about anything so much as eating."
+
+As Fred Marston remarked to me, while helping himself a third time to
+the salad, "It's a stunning old lay-out, isn't it!" His wife was there,
+dressed "to kill," as he himself said, and dancing with every gentleman
+she could decoy into asking her.
+
+After we had come up from the supper-room, Fred Marston pulled me into a
+corner, and inflicted on me a volley of stinging observations about the
+people in the room. George, Bessie, Mrs. Pinkerton, and Miss Van were, I
+supposed, in one of the other rooms; I had lost sight of them.
+
+"Old Jenks lost a cool hundred thousand fighting the tiger at Saratoga,
+this last summer," said Fred. "I had it from a man who backed him. Do
+you know that young widow talking with him near the end of the piano?
+No? Why, that's Mrs. Delascelles, and a devil of a little piece she
+is,--twice divorced and once widowed, and she isn't a day over
+twenty-five. You ought to know her. By the way, that brother of yours is
+a whole team, with a bull-pup under the wagon. Does he let old Pink boss
+him around as she does you?"
+
+"It's a fine night," I said.
+
+"Delightful! I say, Charlie, it must be a terrible bore to lug the old
+woman around to all these shindigs with you, hey?"
+
+"What do you think about the State election?" I demanded.
+
+"The Republicans have got a dead sure thing, I'll lay you a V. She has
+bulldozed you till you don't dare open your head, my boy. Yours is one
+of the saddest and most malignant cases of mother-in-law I ever struck."
+
+"Fred," I said, in hopes of bringing his tirade to an end, "your
+friendship is slightly oppressive. Confine your attentions to your own
+grievances. I will take care of mine."
+
+"Ah! at last you acknowledge that you have one. Confess, now, that old
+Pink is a confounded nuisance!"
+
+"Well, then, yes, she is! Does that satisfy you, scandal-monger? Now,
+for Heaven's sake, shut up!"
+
+I heard a brisk rustling of silk just at my left and a little back of
+where I sat, and some one passed toward the front parlor.
+
+"By Jove!" ejaculated Fred, looking intently. "It's old Pink herself,
+and I hope she got the benefit of what we said about her. I had no idea
+she was sitting near us."
+
+"What _we_ said about her!" I repeated. "I didn't say anything about
+her."
+
+"Yes, you did. Ha, ha! You said she was a confounded nuisance!"
+
+I shuddered.
+
+"Oh, well, brace up! Perhaps she didn't hear that impious remark," said
+Fred, chuckling maliciously. "Or if she did, perhaps she'll let you off
+easy: only a few hours in the dark closet, or bread and water for a day
+or two."
+
+"Confound your mischief-making tongue!" I growled. "Here comes Miss Van
+Duzen to bid you quit spreading scandal about her guests."
+
+Miss Van Duzen, on the contrary, only wished Mr. Marston to secure a
+partner for the Lanciers, which he promptly did.
+
+I sat brooding while the dancing went on, and was somewhat astonished,
+when it was over, to see George making for my corner.
+
+"How's this?" he said. "Didn't you go home with them?"
+
+"With them? What! You don't mean to say--"
+
+"But I do, though! Bessie and mother made their adieux half an hour
+ago, and I thought of course you had gone home with them, as nothing was
+said to me. This is a pretty go! Bessie must have been ill."
+
+"Nonsense!" I exclaimed. "I should have known if that was the case.
+Where's Miss Van?"
+
+"I saw her. She thought it was odd, but supposed you had gone with them.
+What could have started them off in that fashion?"
+
+"Well, well, don't let's stand here talking. Come on."
+
+We did not stop for ceremony. Rushing up stairs, we donned our hats and
+coats, and made our way out to the sidewalk without losing any time. I
+hailed a carriage, and we drove rapidly out of town. It was about half
+past one o'clock when we arrived home. There were lights in our room and
+in Mrs. Pinkerton's chamber. George followed me up stairs, and I tapped
+at the door of our room.
+
+"Is it you, Charlie?" said Bessie's voice.
+
+"Yes,--and George."
+
+She opened the door. It was evidently not long since their arrival
+home, for she had not begun to undress.
+
+"Explain, for our benefit, the new method of leaving a party," said
+George, "and why it was deemed necessary to give us a scare in
+inaugurating the same." He threw himself into an easy-chair.
+
+"Perhaps Mr. Travers is better able to tell you why mother should have
+left in the way she did," said Bessie, trying to make her speech sound
+sarcastic and cutting, but finding it a difficult job, with her breath
+coming and going so quickly.
+
+"The deuce he is!" roared George. "Come, Charlie, what have you been up
+to? I must get it out of some of you."
+
+"I am utterly unable to tell you why your mother should have left in the
+way she did," was all I could find to say.
+
+"Sapristi! This is getting mysterious and blood-curdling. The latest
+_feuilleton_ is nothing to it. Must I go to bed without knowing the
+cause of this escapade? Well, so be it. But let me tell you, young
+woman, that it wasn't the thing to do. If you find your husband flirting
+with some siren, you must lead him off by the ear next time, but don't
+sulk. Good night."
+
+George walked out and shut the door after him.
+
+"See here, Bessie," I said kindly, "don't cry, because I want to talk
+sensibly with you."
+
+She was sobbing now in good earnest.
+
+"I want you to tell me what your mother said to you about me."
+
+She couldn't talk just then, poor little woman! But when she had had her
+cry partly out, she told me.
+
+Her mother had not told her a word of what had passed between Fred
+Marston and me! The outraged dignity of the widow would not admit of an
+explicit account of the unspeakable insult she had received. She had
+simply given Bessie to understand that I had uttered some unpardonable,
+infamous slander, and had hustled the poor girl breathlessly into a cab
+and away, before she fairly realized what had happened.
+
+I then told Bessie what our conversation had been, and left her to judge
+for herself. I had not the heart to scold her for her part in the French
+leave-taking, though it made me feel miserable to think how few
+episodes of such a sort might bring about endless misunderstandings and
+heart-aches.
+
+Of course more or less talk was caused by the mysterious manner of our
+several departures from Miss Van's party; and, thanks to Fred Marston
+and his wife and similar rattle-pates, it became generally known that
+there was a skeleton in the Pinkerton closet.
+
+Miss Van soon heard how it came about, and nothing could have afforded a
+more complete proof of her refinement of character than the delicacy and
+tact with which she ignored the whole affair.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII.
+
+ANOTHER CHARLIE IN THE FIELD.
+
+
+The winter, with its petty trials and contentions, had gone by; spring,
+with its bloom and fragrance, was far advanced; and already another
+summer, with its possible pleasures and recreations, was close upon us.
+Before it had fairly set in, however, an event of extraordinary
+importance was to occur in our little household. There had been
+premonitions of it for some time, which had a tendency to soften and
+soothe all asperities, and cause a rather sober and subdued air to
+pervade the little cottage, and now there were active preparations going
+on. Of course, the widow was gradually assuming the management of the
+whole affair, and it was a matter in which I could hardly venture to
+dispute her right. Her experience and knowledge were certainly superior
+to mine, and it was an affair in which these qualities were very
+important. In fact, I seemed to be counted out altogether in the
+preparations, as if it was something in the nature of a surprise party
+in my honor. Mrs. Pinkerton had an air of mysterious and exclusive
+knowledge concerning the grand event. Miss Van, who had come to have
+confidential relations with Bessie, of the most intimate kind,
+notwithstanding the mother's objections, knew all about it, but had a
+queer way of appearing unconscious of anything unusual. There seemed to
+be a general consent to a shallow pretence that I was in utter and
+hopeless ignorance. It annoyed me a little, as I flattered myself that I
+knew quite as much about what was coming as any of them, and I thought
+it silly to make believe I didn't, and to ignore my interest in the
+affair. Bessie had no secrets from me, of course, and our understanding
+was complete, but one might have thought from appearances that we had
+less concern in the matter than anybody else.
+
+As the auspicious time drew near, the goings-on increased in mystery and
+the widow's control grew more and more complete. Bessie showed me one
+day a wardrobe that amused me immensely. It was quite astonishing in
+its extent and variety, but so liliputian in the dimensions of the
+separate garments as to seem ridiculous to me.
+
+"Aren't they cunning?" said the dear girl, holding up one after another
+of the various articles of raiment. Then she showed me a basket,
+marvellously constructed, with a mere skeleton of wicker-work and
+coverings of pink silk and fine lace, and furnished with toilet
+appliances that seemed to belong to a fairy; and finally, removing a big
+quilt that had excited my curiosity, she showed me the most startling
+object of all,--a cradle! I had seen such things before and felt no
+particular thrill, but this had a strange effect upon me. I didn't stop
+to inquire how these things had all been smuggled into the house without
+my knowledge or consent, but kissed my little wife fondly, and went down
+stairs in a musing and pensive mood.
+
+The next day a decree of virtual exile was pronounced upon me. My
+mother-in-law thought perhaps it would be better if I would occupy
+another room in the house for a time, and let her share Bessie's
+chamber. The poor, dear girl might need her care at any time, and the
+widow looked at me as much as to say, "You cannot be expected to know
+anything about these matters, and have nothing to do but obey my
+directions." I consented without a murmur or the least show of
+resistance, for I admitted everything that could possibly be said, and
+lost all my spirit of independence in view of the impressive event that
+was coming. So I meekly took to the attic, and put up with the most
+forlorn and desolate quarters. One or two mornings after, I was aroused
+at an inhuman hour, and ordered in the most imperative tones to call in
+Dr. Lyman as quickly as possible, and haste after Mrs. Sweet. I hurried
+into my clothes in the utmost agitation, raced down the street in a
+manner that led a watchful policeman to stop me and inquire my business,
+rung up the doctor with the most unbecoming violence, and delivered my
+errand up a speaking-tube, in answer to his muffled, "What's wanted?"
+Then I rushed to the neighboring stable, and got up the sleepy hostler
+with as much vehemence in my manner as if he were in danger of being
+burned to death, and induced him to harness a team, in what I
+considered about twice the necessary length of time; drove three miles
+in the morning twilight for Mrs. Sweet, a motherly old maid in the
+nursing business, who had officiated at Bessie's own _debut_ upon the
+stage of life. When I had got back and returned the team to the stable,
+and was walking about the lower rooms in a restless manner, feeling as
+if I had suddenly become a hopeless outcast, the doctor came down
+stairs, and said, with amazing calmness, as though it was the most
+commonplace thing in the world,--
+
+"Getting on nicely. Fine boy, sir! Mrs. Travers is quite comfortable.
+Will look in again in the course of the morning."
+
+Then I was left alone again, an outcast and a wanderer in my own home.
+All the life was up stairs, including the wee bit of new life that had
+come to venture upon the perils and vicissitudes of the great world. It
+was two hours, but it seemed a month, before any one relieved my
+solitude, and then it was at Bessie's interposition--in fact, a command
+that she had to insist upon until her mother was afraid of her getting
+excited--that I was admitted to behold the mysteries above.
+
+Well, it is nobody's business about the particulars of that chamber. It
+was too sacred for description; but there was the tiny, quivering, red
+new-comer, already dressed in some of the dainty liliputian garments,
+and very much astonished and not altogether pleased at the effect.
+Bessie was proud and happy, the nurse, moving about silently, knew just
+what to do and how to do it, and the mother-in-law held supreme command.
+She was grand and severe, and evidently her wishes had been disregarded
+in respect to the sex of her grandchild. She feared the consequences of
+another Charlie launched into a world already too degenerate, and she
+had hoped for an addition to the superior sex. But Bessie and I were
+mightily pleased that it was a boy.
+
+There was little to be said then, but in a few days the restraint began
+to be relaxed, and discussions arose about what had become the most
+important member of the household. Even the widow must be content with
+the second place now, but I began to have misgivings lest my position
+had been permanently fixed as the third. In my secret mind, however, I
+determined to assert my rights as soon as Bessie was strong again, and
+reduce my mother-in-law to the position in which she belonged. I had put
+off doing it too long, and advantage might be taken of the present
+juncture of affairs to strengthen her claim to supremacy, and it really
+wouldn't do to delay much longer.
+
+"I think he looks just like Charlie," said Bessie to Miss Van, the first
+time the latter called after the great event.
+
+"Well, I don't know," was the reply. "It seems to me he has his papa's
+dark eyes, but I can't see any other resemblance."
+
+"Oh, I do!" Bessie replied with spirit. "Why, it is just his forehead
+and mouth, and his hair will be just the same beautiful brown when he
+grows up."
+
+The old lady was looking on reproachfully, and finally said, "Bessie, my
+dear, that child looks precisely like your own family. George at his age
+was just such an infant; you couldn't tell them apart."
+
+George entered the room at that moment, and with his boisterous laugh
+said, "You don't mean to say that I was ever such a little, soft,
+ridiculous lump of humanity as that, do you?"
+
+"As like as two peas," was the reply of his mother.
+
+For my part I kept out of the discussion, for I must confess I could see
+no resemblance between the precious baby and any other mortal creature,
+except another baby of the same age. I thought they looked pretty much
+all alike, and was not prepared to deny that it was the exact
+counterpart of anybody at that particular stage of development.
+
+"I tell you what, Bess," said George, after the debate had fully
+subsided, "you must name that little chap for me."
+
+"Oh, no," replied the proud mother, "that is all settled; his name is
+Charlie."
+
+Nothing had been said on the subject before, and I was a little startled
+at Bessie's positive manner, for I thought even this matter would not be
+free from her mother's dictation. The old lady seemed surprised and
+vexed. "George is a much better name, I think," she said very quietly,
+keeping down her vexation, "but I thought perhaps you might remember
+your dear father in this matter. His name, you know, was Benjamin."
+
+"Yes, I know," said Bessie, very firmly, "but I think there is one with
+a still higher claim, and the child's name is Charles."
+
+"Good for you, little girl!" I thought, but I said nothing. Within me I
+felt a gleeful satisfaction at Bessie's spirit, which showed that if it
+ever came to a sharp contest with her mother, nothing could keep her
+from holding her own place by her husband's side. All my misgivings
+about her possible estrangement by her mother's influence vanished, and
+I saw that the new tie between us would be stronger than any earthly
+power.
+
+"Well," said George abruptly, after a pause, "I wouldn't be so
+disobliging about a little thing like that."
+
+"Ah! you wait until you can afford the opportunity of furnishing names,
+and see what you will do," I said jokingly. My joke was not generally
+appreciated. The widow gave me a look a little short of savage. Bessie
+suppressed a smile, in order to give me a reproof with her eyes, and
+Miss Van just then thought of something wholly irrelevant to say, as if
+she had not noticed my remark at all. On the whole, I was made to feel
+that it was a disgraceful failure.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX.
+
+THE SHADOW ON OUR LIFE.
+
+
+Another summer with all its glory was upon us. It was nearly a year
+since we were married, and I was beginning to feel the dignity of a
+family man. As Bessie regained her strength and bloom, she seemed to
+have a matronly grace and self-command quite new to her. As I looked
+back over our married life I saw no dark shadows, no coldness between us
+two, no misunderstandings that need occasion regret, but somehow it
+seemed as though that year had not been so bright and happy as it ought
+to have been. We had lived under an irksome restraint that was
+depressing. I had felt it more than Bessie, for she had been accustomed
+to submit to her mother, and did not chafe, but she plainly saw that my
+life had not that blithesomeness that would have been natural to me, and
+which she would have been glad to give it.
+
+It was the presence and influence of the mother-in-law that gave a
+chill to my home life, and yet I could accuse the good woman of no
+special offence. She was no vulgar meddler, and never wished or intended
+to mar our domestic felicity. She had managed to keep control of our
+household arrangements and we had passively acquiesced, but I felt that
+it would be better if Bessie would take command and cater more to our
+own desires. We could then have things our own way, and her position
+would be more becoming as the lady of the house. She began to regard it
+in the same light herself. Our social life, too, had been restrained and
+restricted. I was very fond of having my friends about me, and wished
+them to come in for the evening or to dinner or to pass a Sunday
+afternoon in our little bower, as often as they could find it agreeable.
+Mrs. Pinkerton made no open objections, but I knew the company of my
+friends was not congenial to her, and so was reluctant and backward in
+my invitations to them. Besides, they were apt to be chilled and
+disconcerted by the widow's stately presence and rebuking ways, and were
+disinclined to make themselves quite at home with us. Fred Marston and
+his wife had been quite driven away. Mrs. Pinkerton had declined to
+speak to the latter, and had told the former in plain terms that he used
+language of which no gentleman would be guilty.
+
+"By thunder!" roared the impulsive fellow, "I'll have you to understand
+that my wife and I are just as good as you, with your cursed airs of
+superiority!" and he stormed out of doors, and incontinently returned to
+town. When I met him afterwards he condescendingly declared that he
+didn't blame me, except that I ought to be a man and not allow "old
+Pink" to insult my guests. I did not particularly regret his
+discontinuing his visits, for, to tell the truth, I did not like his
+manners, and he had drifted into a circle and among associates not at
+all to my taste, but it galled me to have any one whom I chose to
+entertain driven out of my house.
+
+I think nothing saved our charming friend, Miss Van Duzen, to whom we
+had both become greatly attached, from being gracefully snubbed and
+insulted, except the presence of her uncle, whenever she came out to
+visit us in the evening. Mr. Desmond's indisputable social rank, his
+unimpeachable demeanor as a gentleman, and the dignity and
+impressiveness of his presence, though it could by no means overawe my
+mother-in-law, made it impossible even for her to give him an affront.
+Besides, she seemed to have a real respect for that fine old gentleman.
+She would doubtless have thought better of him if he had been a regular
+attendant at St. Thomas's Church, but she could not learn that he was
+very constant at any sanctuary. His views were decidedly what are called
+liberal, and yet he was very considerate of the religious beliefs and
+practices of others, and would cheerfully acknowledge the worthy aims
+and good works of all the different Christian denominations. He seemed
+to understand why other persons should choose to join one or another,
+while he preferred to stand aloof, have his own ways of thinking, and do
+whatever good he might in his own way. He had large business interests
+and great wealth, and though he maintained his mansion in the city in
+great elegance, his family expenses were comparatively small, and he was
+reputed to make it up fully by supporting more than one poor family in
+a quiet way. He was liberal in his conduct as well as his belief, and
+his character and habits were above the reproach of the severest critic.
+Hence it was that the widow was forced to respect at least this one of
+our visitors, and to treat his niece with common civility, though
+cordiality was out of the question.
+
+In fact, we owed to Mr. Desmond not a little for what relief we obtained
+in our social life from the chilling restraints of the mother-in-law's
+presence. He seemed to take a real pleasure in coming out to our little
+snuggery. His stately establishment in town could not be very home-like.
+His niece presided over it with great skill, and saw that every wish or
+taste of his was gratified. She could always entertain him with her
+sprightly wit, and their social occasions were among the most elegant in
+the city. He had his club to go to, which furnished every means that
+ingenuity and lavish resources could contrive to minister to the
+pleasures of man. And yet, there was wanting to his life that element
+that was the essence of home. He had longed for it when he was young,
+and had provided for it in his household; but the wife of his youth had
+been called from him early, and he had vainly tried to fill all his life
+with business, with silent works of charity, with elegance and profusion
+in his house, with his clubs, his studies, and his travels; but still
+there was a void, and when he came to visit us, he seemed to find
+something akin to the home feeling in our little circle. So he came far
+oftener than was to be expected of one in his position. Clara was his
+excuse, but it was plain to see that he liked to come on his own
+account, and he made himself very agreeable to us all; and when he came,
+we noticed the chilling influence of Mrs. Pinkerton much less than when
+he was not there.
+
+Sometimes we had a whist party. It was generally Bessie and I against
+Clara and George, but the widow had no objection to whist and was
+occasionally induced to take a hand, while Mr. Desmond was quite fond of
+the game and was a consummate player. When we young people made up the
+set, Mr. Desmond would converse with the widow, for though reticent
+where politeness did not call upon him to talk, he was incapable of the
+rudeness of sitting silent with one other person, or in a small party
+of intimate friends; and these conversations, showing his wide
+information on all manner of subjects, his sympathy with all charitable
+movements, and his tolerant regard even for the widow's pet ideas on
+church and society, evidently increased her respect for him.
+
+George must not be forgotten as a member of our circle, and never can be
+by those who were in it. His vivacity did much to relieve us from the
+depression that brooded over us. He and Clara Van, as he had taken to
+calling her as a sort of play upon caravan,--for was she not a whole
+team in herself? he would say,--he and Clara had many a lively contest
+of words, and were well matched in their powers of wit and repartee.
+
+Thus there were lights as well as shades, relief as well as depression,
+in our social life, but over it all was a shadow, the shadow of my
+mother-in-law.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X.
+
+MY MOTHER-IN-LAW SUBDUED.
+
+
+As I was saying, I made up my mind that our happiness was marred by
+habitual submission to mother-in-law, and I determined to shake off the
+nightmare, to assert myself, and to reduce that stately crown of gray
+puffs to a subordinate place. How was I to do it? There was nothing that
+I could make the cause of direct complaint, and it was hard to get into
+a downright conflict which would involve plain speaking. I consulted
+with Bessie, and she agreed with me, and promised to assume the
+direction of household affairs. She did not like to hurt her mother's
+feelings, but she admitted that it was best for her to be mistress. I
+could but admire the matronly firmness and tact with which she played
+her part. She gave her orders and told her mother what she proposed to
+do, and then proceeded to execute it as if there was no room for
+question. If opposition was made, she very quietly and firmly insisted.
+Her mother was astonished and had some warm words, in which she accused
+me of trying to set her daughter against her.
+
+"Oh, no," said Bessie, "Charlie does not wish to set me against you or
+to have you made unhappy, but he thinks it better that I should be the
+mistress here, and I quite agree with him, and propose henceforth to be
+the mistress."
+
+The widow was not offended, but hurt. She had too much good sense not to
+see the propriety of our decision, and she surrendered and tried not to
+appear affected.
+
+This was the first victory. Another time, at the table, she had
+exercised her prescriptive right of extinguishing me for some remark of
+which she did not approve. I fired up and remarked, "I have the right to
+speak my own opinion in my own house, Mrs. Pinkerton."
+
+"Certainly you have a right to speak your own opinion in your own
+house," she replied, with the least little sarcastic emphasis on "your
+own house," which cut me to the quick.
+
+"But you don't seem to think so," I said. "You have had a way of
+snubbing me and putting me down which I don't propose to tolerate any
+longer. I am master of my own conduct and of my own household, and I
+hope, in future, that my liberty may not be interfered with."
+
+The widow's lip quivered, her great eyes moistened, and she left the
+table, not because she was offended, but to hide her injured feelings. I
+felt mean, and would have apologized, but that I felt that my cause was
+at stake. There was no after-explanation. My mother-in-law came and went
+about the house as usual, calm and polite. A silly woman would have
+refused to speak to me for some weeks; but she was not a silly woman,
+and took pains to speak with the most studied politeness, and to avoid
+offence. Here, too, she had evidently surrendered.
+
+This was victory number two. One more and the battle was won. It was a
+Sunday in June. I had especially invited Mr. Desmond and his niece to
+come out to dinner and to spend the afternoon, and had insisted to Fred
+Marston that he should come with his wife. I wanted to vindicate my
+right to have what friends I pleased, and then I didn't care overmuch if
+I never saw him again. Mrs. Pinkerton had gone to church alone as usual.
+For some weeks Bessie had been unable to accompany her, and I preferred
+the sanctuary at which the scholarly, but heterodox, Mr. Freeman
+preached. When she returned, our guests had arrived. She put on her
+eye-glasses as she entered the gate, and looked about with evident
+disapproval, as we were scattered over the lawn. She did not believe in
+Sunday visits. She was even stiff and distant to Mr. Desmond, and
+refused to see the Marstons at all, though they were directly before her
+eyes. She walked straight into the house.
+
+"By Jove," said George to me in an undertone, "that isn't right! I shall
+speak to mother about cutting your guests in that way."
+
+"Never mind," I replied, "don't you say a word; I want an opportunity."
+
+He saw it in a minute, and acquiesced with a queer smile. He fully
+sympathized with me, and had even encouraged me in the work of
+emancipation. He had the utmost respect and affection for his mother,
+but he said it was not right for her to make my home unpleasant.
+
+That Sunday Mrs. Pinkerton joined us at the dinner-table. I knew she
+would not be guilty of the incivility of staying away.
+
+"You remember my friends, Mr. and Mrs. Marston?" I said, by way of
+introduction, as she came in.
+
+"I remember them very well," was the reply; "too well," the tone
+implied. I made a special effort to be talkative, and to keep others
+talking during the dinner. It was very hard work, and I met with
+indifferent success. It was not a pleasant dinner. Mr. Desmond alone
+appeared not to mind the restraint, and he alone ventured to address the
+widow. She was polite, but far from sociable. We contrived to pass the
+afternoon tolerably, but not at all in the spirit which I wished to have
+prevail when I had friends to visit me, and all because of that
+presence.
+
+After they were gone, I took occasion to introduce the subject, for I
+had learned that Mrs. Pinkerton's skill in expressing her disapproval in
+her manner was so great that she relied on it almost altogether, and
+rarely resorted to words for the purpose.
+
+"I am afraid you did not enjoy the company very much to-day," I said, as
+we were sitting in the little parlor, overlooking an exquisite flower
+garden.
+
+"No, sir," she answered, with the old emphasis on the "sir." "I do not
+approve of company on the Sabbath, and I had hoped you would never again
+bring those Marstons into my presence at any time."
+
+"Excuse me, madam; but I propose to be my own judge of whom I shall
+invite to visit me, and of the time and occasion. I presume you admit my
+right to do so."
+
+"Certainly, sir. I never disputed it, and had no intention of saying
+anything if you had not introduced the subject."
+
+"I introduced the subject for the very purpose; in fact, I brought out
+the company for the very purpose of vindicating my right, and it would
+be very gratifying to me if you would concede it cheerfully, and not, by
+your manner and way of treating my friends, interfere with it
+hereafter."
+
+I was almost astonished at my own courage and spirit, and still more so
+at Mrs. Pinkerton's reply. It was dusky and I could not see her face,
+but her voice trembled and choked as she answered,--
+
+"God knows I do not wish to interfere with your happiness. Bessie's
+happiness has been my one thought for years, and now it is bound up with
+yours. I have my own notions, which I cannot easily discard, but I would
+not do or say anything that would mar your enjoyment for the world. I
+have long felt that I did do so, and have made up my mind to make any
+sacrifice of pride and inclination to avoid it."
+
+Here she actually broke down and sobbed, and I was very near joining
+her. "Never mind," I said at length, quite softened; "I guess we shall
+get along pleasantly together in the future, now that we have an
+understanding."
+
+"I hope so," she said, recovering her serenity, and we relapsed into a
+painful silence.
+
+This was the third and final victory, but I felt no elation over it. My
+mother-in-law receded somewhat into the background, but it was so much
+in sorrow, rather than anger, that I felt her new mood almost as
+depressing as the old. I didn't want her to feel injured or subdued, but
+evidently she couldn't help it, and the mother-in-law, though conquered,
+was herself still, and that congeniality that would make our life
+together wholly pleasant was impossible. Her existence was still a
+shadow, less chilling and more pensive, but a shadow in our home, and it
+seemed destined to stay there.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI.
+
+GEORGE'S NEW DEPARTURE.
+
+
+"George is growing very restless. I don't know what ails him," Bessie
+said to me.
+
+"I can guess," I said, looking wise.
+
+"What is it?"
+
+"Do you remember what an uneasy, good-for-nothing chap one Charlie
+Travers was, when he first began to call on a certain young woman with
+conspicuous regularity?"
+
+"O Charlie, you don't think he--"
+
+"No, no! Now don't explode too suddenly. I wouldn't have him know that I
+suspect anything for the world. We won't name any names, but I keep my
+eyes about me, and I flatter myself I know the symptoms."
+
+And with these mysterious words, I started for the bank, leaving to
+Bessie a new and delightful subject for speculation and air-castle
+building.
+
+George did not come home to supper that day, but that was nothing
+extraordinary. I was sitting out on the porch, smoking after the meal,
+and saw him coming up the street.
+
+"Where have you been?" I asked, as he joined me and took a seat.
+
+"None of your business. In town."
+
+"Is Miss Van well?" I asked mischievously.
+
+"How should I know?"
+
+"Come, George, you don't play the part of Innocence over well. Suppose
+you try Candor, and tell me where you have been."
+
+"You mistake my identity. I'm not your baby. You will find the youthful
+Charlie entertaining his mother up stairs."
+
+A long-drawn-out, agonized wail, proceeding from the regions above,
+showed how Bessie was being entertained.
+
+"No opening yet?" I ventured to ask, changing the subject.
+
+"Not the slightest prospect. If some of these doctors could only be
+inveigled into taking some of their own prescriptions! But no; they are
+too wise."
+
+"The bitterness of your tone would seem to indicate that you have not
+enjoyed your visit to the town."
+
+"The town be hanged, and the country too! Let's take a walk down the
+street. Give me a cigar, confound you! How hot it is!"
+
+We strolled down the street.
+
+"This is a terrible vale of tears, this world," said I. "The world is
+hollow, and my doll is stuffed with sawdust, which accounts for his
+howling."
+
+George was silent. He pulled at his cigar ferociously, smoked it half
+up, threw it away, and replaced it by a cigarette.
+
+"When a man throws away the best part of a Reina Victoria he is either
+flush or badly in love," said I to myself. I waited patiently for him to
+speak, as I was perfectly willing to receive his confidence, but I
+didn't have the chance. He maintained a loud silence all the way, and we
+walked back home as we had gone out.
+
+"Something's up--something serious," I informed Bessie that night, "but
+George does not confide in me worth a cent, which I think is a little
+unbrotherly."
+
+The following day George was absent from an early hour in the afternoon
+till long after all the household were fast asleep at night. I was
+awakened at about midnight by a light tapping at the door of our room,
+and slipped out of bed without disturbing Bessie or the baby.
+
+"Come up to my den!" whispered George, as I opened the door. "Don't wake
+the others."
+
+I quietly got into my clothes and crawled noiselessly up to George's
+"den," devoured by curiosity. The moment I caught sight of his handsome
+face I saw that it was all right with him, and that he had nothing but
+good news to tell me. We sat down, hoisted our heels to a comfortable
+altitude, and George told his story. I let him tell it himself here:--
+
+"I was feeling terribly blue yesterday, when you saw me," he began, "as
+you could see. In the afternoon I went into town, and, according to a
+previous arrangement, hired a horse and buggy and called to take her out
+riding."
+
+(Of course "her" was Miss Van.)
+
+"We had agreed to take the old Linwood road, and follow it to the
+village, returning through the Maplewood Park and so getting back to the
+city at about six. We left the town and passed through the suburbs
+rapidly, until we struck into the country, and there I let the horse go
+his own pace, which was slow. So much the better. Miss Van Duzen was
+never more charming. We had the most agreeable bit of talk, and she drew
+me out till I amazed myself. She always does. It's no use my telling
+you, Charlie, but I have been a fool in my love for her ever since the
+night she came into this cottage like a stray beam of sunshine on a
+cloudy day. My heart went out of my keeping the night she called here
+with the old gentleman. I believe it was her freshness, her moral
+purity, that acted on my morbid, half _blase_ spirit, like a tonic, and
+brought me on my feet. I'm talking random nonsense, you say, but why
+shouldn't I? I'm drunk with love. Don't laugh at me. I'll be all right
+by daylight, except a headache. We got to talking about ourselves.
+Lovers always do, don't they? You ought to know. There doesn't seem to
+be much else in the world worth talking about. I told her all about
+myself,--my past, with its good and bad points, and my present hopes and
+purposes. It all popped out as naturally as possible. I suppose it would
+sound like drivel if I were to repeat it. Finally she began to laugh.
+
+"'It is dangerous to make a woman your confidant,' she said. 'How do you
+know that I can keep a secret better than any other of my sex?'
+
+"'I am not afraid on that score,' said I. 'This is my confessional. It
+is as sacred as any. Am I to receive absolution?'
+
+"She could not fully promise that. She read me a neat little lecture. It
+was fascinating to thus receive correction at her hands. I pledged
+myself, when it was done, to follow the course laid out for me. Then I
+made bold to exchange _roles_. With some maidenly hesitation, which soon
+vanished, she in turn laid before me the inner history of her life. Ah,
+my boy, how little there was in it to gloss over! how much to humiliate
+the best and noblest of us men! It was a revelation that made me
+prostrate myself before her. I was not worthy to hear it."
+
+George paused, and drummed on the table with his fingers nervously.
+
+"I may as well tell you all," he resumed. "I had resolved to ask that
+girl to marry me when we started on our ride, but after what she said to
+me so simply and modestly, I positively could not do it. She expected me
+to speak, I know that, for she would not have told me what she did tell
+me, otherwise."
+
+"So you didn't speak? Oh, stupid, stupid boy!"
+
+"I know it. But my tongue was tied. Perhaps it was all cowardice; I
+can't say. I never was afraid of any one before. I came home utterly
+shattered and down-hearted. To-day I gravitated back to her, after a
+sleepless night. She received me with the same friendly smile as usual,
+but there seemed to be a slight shadow over her spirits. That little,
+almost imperceptible change filled me with joy. I jumped to a conclusion
+that intoxicated me, and made the plunge at once.
+
+"'It is another case of the moth and the candle,' I said to her.
+
+"'Thank you. So I am a candle? That is a fine figure of speech.'
+
+"'Seriously speaking, I think we had not finished what we were talking
+of yesterday.'
+
+"'What were we talking of yesterday?' she had the effrontery to ask.
+'Oh, yes, now I recollect. It was yourself. That subject, I fear, you
+will never finish talking of.'
+
+"'Now that's a very mean speech, all things considered,' I whined. 'Do
+you want to strike a man, when he's way down?'
+
+"'Don't play Uriah Heep. I hate 'umble people. But if I have perchance
+pierced the thick epidermis of Parisian pride you have so long worn, I'm
+glad of it.'
+
+"She likes to abuse me, and I enjoy it quite as well as she. She
+continued to scold me and mock me for some time, to disguise her actual
+mood. I saw through it, and let her have her way for a while. The meeker
+my replies, the greater the exaggerated harshness of her criticisms. At
+last I no longer attempted to reply at all. Leaning back in a corner of
+the sofa, I watched the play of her animated features and the light of
+her dark brown eyes, and felt that she was the one woman in the
+universe that suited me, the one woman I could respect and love
+passionately at the same time.
+
+"'You say truly I am a coward. I am aware of that. I admit that I am all
+that is detestable. If such a wretch as you describe were to love a
+woman, what unhappiness for him! There could be no hope for him. He
+would know his own irredeemable unworthiness, and so could only slink
+away in shame.'
+
+"'You are quite right,' she cried, laughing merrily. 'That would be the
+only course for him to pursue.'
+
+"'By the way,' I said, 'that reminds me that my train goes out in twenty
+minutes.'
+
+"I rose, and she also stood up to accompany me to the door. I held out
+my hand. It was an unusual demonstration, and perhaps she thought it
+meant good-by in earnest. At least, as she put her hand in mine, I
+detected a look I had never before seen in the depths of those fine
+eyes. With a sudden, unpremeditated, and irresistible movement, I drew
+her close to me, folded my arms about her, and kissed her passionately.
+
+"'Clara!' I whispered, 'I love you! I love you! Don't tell me to go.'
+
+"She gently drew herself out of my reluctant arms, and though her eyes
+were misty now, I saw in them that I was to stay.
+
+"That's all the story I have to tell you, Charlie. I am too happy
+to-night to sleep, so I couldn't let you sleep. I stayed and spent the
+evening. Mr. Desmond, bless his dear old heart! cried over Clara, and
+gave her an old-fashioned blessing. I walked home on air. Do I look very
+badly corned?"
+
+I gave him a rousing hand-shake, and wiped away a stray bit of moisture
+from my cheek.
+
+"May I tell Bessie?" were my first words when I found my tongue.
+
+"Why not? There will be no long engagement in this case. The knot shall
+be tied as soon as possible."
+
+The announcement I made to my little wife the following morning was not
+entirely unexpected, yet it filled her with delight. Miss Van was the
+woman of all others that Bessie wished to have George marry. The
+arrangement was, therefore, completely to her satisfaction, and she
+beamed upon the happy George with true sisterly affection.
+
+What effect would the news have upon Mrs. Pinkerton? I asked myself. I
+had not long to wait for an answer, for it was at the breakfast-table
+that George fired the shot.
+
+"Mother," said the bold youth, "I'm going to be married."
+
+His mother abruptly stopped stirring her coffee, and her spine visibly
+stiffened, but she said nothing.
+
+"The event will occur without delay. Of course it is useless to inform
+you who is the--"
+
+"Quite useless," Mrs. Pinkerton broke in; "my wishes in the matter are
+not of the slightest consequence to you."
+
+"On the contrary. Now, look here; don't be so infernally quick to
+anticipate my wilfulness. I want to conform to your wishes if I can.
+_Que faire?_"
+
+"We will talk about it after breakfast."
+
+Accordingly, there was a serious passage-at-arms in the library after
+breakfast. George left the house a conqueror, but the conquered had no
+sort of intention of abandoning the campaign after a Bull Run defeat. In
+fact, war had only just been declared. It must not be supposed that it
+was a war the movements of which could be followed by the acutest
+military observer; the batteries were all masked, but the gunpowder was
+there. I felt confident that George would carry everything before him,
+and he did. He brought Miss Van over to spend the evening, and we had
+the pleasantest time imaginable. He would not allow his mother to say a
+word against Miss Van, and made a fair show of proving that the latter
+had, not only better blood, but also better breeding and a truer sense
+of propriety than my mother-in-law, that is, "when it came to the
+scratch," as George said. "But who would give a snap for a young woman
+who can't throw aside the shackles of conventionality once in a while,
+and be herself?"
+
+Miss Van was her own jolliest, sweetest self at this time. Her beauty
+had never been so noticeable: joy is an excellent cosmetic, and love
+paints far better than rouge or powder.
+
+As soon as Mrs. Pinkerton had recovered from her defeat, and when the
+engagement had become an acknowledged fact which all the world might
+know, the wedding began to loom up before us, and I could not help
+wondering if St. Thomas's Church was to be the scene of as fashionable
+and grand a display as on the occasion when Bessie and myself were made
+one.
+
+I felt reasonably certain that Mrs. Pinkerton would make an effort to
+that end, and I was curious to see how George would look on it.
+
+Bessie, I think, would have been glad to see the marriage take place
+with as much pomp and show as possible. She was intensely interested in
+what Clara should wear, and every visit from that young woman was the
+occasion for a vast deal of confidential and no doubt highly important
+_tete-a-tete_ consultation.
+
+Mother-in-law sailed into the library one evening with unusual celerity
+of movement.
+
+"George, dear," she said, "this cannot be true! You would not permit
+such an eccentric, uncivilized proceeding. Surely you will not offend
+our friends by--"
+
+"Avast there! Our friends be hanged!" cried George wickedly. "Yes, it's
+true, too true. The ceremony will be private, and no cards. You can
+come, though! Next Wednesday, at two o'clock, sharp!"
+
+This was cruel. I could see his mother almost stagger under the blow.
+She attempted to remonstrate, but it was too late. George assured her
+that "it was all fixed," and that Clara had agreed with him regarding
+the details.
+
+"Honest old John Stephens will tie the knot," said he, "and it will be
+just as tight as if Dr. McCanon manipulated the holy bonds. I trust we
+shall have the pleasure of your company, mother. Consider yourself
+invited. A few of the choicest spirits will be on hand. Clara will wear
+the most exquisite gray travelling suit you ever laid eyes on."
+
+The widow was flanked, outgeneralled, routed along the whole line. She
+brought forward all her reserve forces of good-breeding, and thus
+escaped a disastrous panic by retiring in good order.
+
+The ceremony occurred, as George had announced, the following
+Wednesday. The near relatives and best friends of the young couple were
+present, and it was a quiet and thoroughly enjoyable affair for all who
+participated. An hour after they had been pronounced man and wife,
+George and his bride rode away to take the train for the mountains.
+
+ "And on her lover's arm she leant,
+ And round her waist she felt it fold,
+ And far across the hills they went
+ In that new world which is the old."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII.
+
+BABY TALK, OLD DIVES, AND OTHER THINGS.
+
+
+The cottage seemed dull enough after the departure of George with his
+bride. Bessie was so absorbed by the care of our little one that she had
+very little time to think of anything else, and in fact the new-comer,
+for the time being, monopolized the attention of his grandmother as well
+as of his mother. I was therefore left to my own resources.
+
+"Baby is not very well, Charlie," Bessie informed me, one morning, with
+an anxious air. "Do you think it would do to wrap him up well and take
+him for a little ride this afternoon?"
+
+"Yes, that's a good idea. If I can get that black horse at the livery
+stable, I'll bring him around this afternoon. But I don't see why you
+should wrap him up. It's hot as blazes."
+
+"You don't know anything about babies, Charlie. Go along. Get a nice,
+easy carriage, and we'll take mother with us. I long for a ride."
+
+I departed, and secured the desired "team."
+
+Towards two o'clock I drove up to the cottage, and the entire family
+bundled into the vehicle, and we were off. I chose a pleasant, shady
+road, and drove slowly, while Bessie and her mother filled the air with
+baby talk.
+
+As we were climbing the hill near Linwood, I saw, a short distance ahead
+of us, the form of an elderly gentleman toiling up the ascent in the
+sun. He seemed fatigued, and stopped as we drew near him, to wipe the
+beads of perspiration from his brow.
+
+"Why, it's Mr. Desmond!" exclaimed Bessie.
+
+Sure enough! As he turned toward us I recognized the white vest, the
+expansive shirt-front, and the resplendent watch-chain that could belong
+to no other than "old Dives" himself.
+
+"How d'ye do?" I cried, halting our fiery steed.
+
+"Ah! Mr. Travers, Mrs. Pinkerton, how do you do? Delighted to meet you.
+It's very warm."
+
+"How came you so far out in the country afoot?" I asked.
+
+"I had some business at Melton, and lost the 2:30 train back to town,
+so I started to walk to Linwood with the purpose of taking a train on
+the other road. They told me it was only a mile and a half, but--." And
+he sighed significantly.
+
+"How fortunate that we met you," said Mrs. Pinkerton quickly, taking the
+words out of my mouth. "Get in and ride to Linwood with us. We have a
+vacant seat, you see."
+
+I seconded her invitation, and without much hesitation he accepted, and
+took a seat by my side. The conversation turned naturally upon the
+"young couple" (Bessie and I were no longer referred to in that way),
+and Mr. Desmond extolled his niece unreservedly. Mother-in-law was
+evidently somewhat impressed, but I think she made some mental
+reservations.
+
+"Will you smoke, Mr. Desmond?" I asked, offering him a cigar.
+
+"No, I thank you."
+
+"Oh, I had forgotten you did not approve of the habit. Excuse me."
+
+Mrs. Pinkerton explained to Mr. Desmond, apologetically, that I was an
+irresponsible victim of the nicotine poison. I laughed, but Mr. Desmond
+received the explanation solemnly, and expressed his abhorrence for "the
+weed."
+
+The old gentleman professed great admiration for baby, and said that he
+looked exactly like his mother; in fact, the resemblance was almost
+startling.
+
+By the time we had got to Linwood, our passenger had talked himself into
+a state of good-humor, and we left him at the railroad station, bowing
+and smiling with true old-school _aplomb_.
+
+Bessie thought the ride did Charlie, junior, good, and so it became a
+regular thing, on pleasant afternoons, to take him out for a little
+airing. Mrs. Pinkerton overcame her scruples, and usually accompanied
+us. A sample of the sweet converse held with my son and heir on the back
+seat will suffice:--
+
+"Sodywazzaleetlecatchykums! 'Esoodavaboobangy! Mamma's cunnin'
+kitten-baby!"
+
+One day, just before noon, when I had been making a mental calculation
+as to how I should be able to cover the livery-stable bill, a fine
+equipage stopped in front of the bank, and through the window I saw the
+stately driver hand a note to our errand-boy. In a moment Tommy appeared
+in the room and handed me the billet, which ran thus:--
+
+ MY DEAR MR. TRAVERS,--I trust you will not take it amiss if I
+ send my coachman out your way once in a while to exercise the
+ ponies. Since Clara's taking-off, they have stood still too
+ much, and knowing that you go to ride occasionally with your
+ family, I take the liberty of putting them at your disposal for
+ the present, with instructions to John, who is a careful and
+ trustworthy driver, to place himself at your service whenever
+ you are so disposed. The obligation will be entirely on my part,
+ if you will kindly take a turn behind the ponies whenever you
+ choose. My regards to your wife and Mrs. Pinkerton.
+
+ Believe me yours sincerely,
+
+ T. G. DESMOND.
+
+
+I could find no objection to accepting this kindly offer, so delicately
+made, but I did not dare to do so before consulting Bessie and her
+mother, so I stepped into the carriage and had John drive me to the
+cottage. There was a consultation, and after I had overcome some feeble
+scruples on Mrs. Pinkerton's part, which I am afraid were hypocritical,
+we decided to take advantage of Mr. Desmond's generosity. I sent a note
+of thanks back by John, and thenceforth we took our rides behind "old
+Dives's" black ponies. Occasionally the old gentleman himself came out
+in the carriage, and proved himself as trustworthy and careful a driver
+as John, handling the "ribbons" with the air of an accomplished whip.
+The rides were very pleasant, those beautiful summer days, and the
+change from a hired "team" to the sumptuous establishment of Mr. Desmond
+was extremely grateful.
+
+Mr. Desmond was doubtless very lonely without his niece. She had been
+the light of his home, and her absence was probably felt by the old
+gentleman with more keenness than he had anticipated at the outset. His
+large and beautifully furnished mansion needed the presence of just such
+a person of vivacious and cheery character as Clara, to prevent it from
+becoming cheerless in its grandeur. He intimated as much, and appeared
+unusually restless and low-spirited for him. He sought to make up for
+the absence of the sunshine and joyousness that "Miss Van" had taken
+away with her, by applying himself with especial diligence to business;
+but he really had not much business to engross his attention, beyond
+collecting his interest and looking out for his agents, and it failed to
+fill the void. He betook himself to his club, and killed time
+assiduously, talking with the men-about-town he found there, playing
+whist, and running through the magazines and reviews in search of wit
+and wisdom wherewith to divert himself. The dull season had set in;
+there was little doing, in affairs, commerce, politics, or literature;
+and direct efforts at killing time always result in making time go more
+heavily than ever. Mr. Desmond's attempt was like a curious _pas seul_,
+executed by a nimble actor in a certain extravaganza, the peculiarity of
+which is that at every forward step the dancer slides farther and
+farther backward, until finally an unseen power appears to drag him back
+into the flies.
+
+It was during one of our afternoon drives, when Mr. Desmond usurped the
+office of his coachman, that he confided to us a plan which he had
+devised to cure his _ennui_.
+
+"I have made up my mind," he said, "to go abroad for a good long tour.
+It will be the best move I could possibly make."
+
+"I don't doubt it," I said. "How soon do you propose to go?" And Bessie
+sighed, "O dear, how delightful!"
+
+"My plans are not matured," Mr. Desmond continued, "but I think I shall
+sail early next month. My favorite steamer leaves on the 6th."
+
+"I hope you will enjoy a pleasant voyage, and a delightful trip on the
+other side," said Mrs. Pinkerton politely.
+
+Mr. Desmond returned thanks. Nothing more was said that day concerning
+his project. When he left us at the cottage, he remarked,--
+
+"By the way, Mr. Travers, I wish you would call at my office to-morrow
+morning at or about eleven o'clock, if you can make it convenient to do
+so."
+
+"I will do so," I replied, wondering what he could want of me.
+
+At the appointed hour the next day I was on hand at his office. He
+motioned to me to be seated and then said,--
+
+"Yesterday morning I met John K. Blunt, of Blunt Brothers & Company, at
+my club, and he told me that their cashier had defaulted. An account of
+the affair is in this morning's papers. They want a new cashier. I have
+mentioned your name, and if you will go around to their office with me,
+we will talk with Blunt."
+
+"Mr. Desmond--" I began, but he stopped me.
+
+"Don't let's have any talk but business," he said. "The figures will be
+satisfactory, I am confident."
+
+Satisfactory! They were munificent! Blunt liked me, and only a few short
+and sharp sentences from such a man as Desmond finished the business. I
+saw a future of opulence before me. My head was almost turned. I tried
+to thank Mr. Desmond, but he would not listen to my earnest expressions
+of gratitude.
+
+"I have engaged passage for the 6th," he told me when we were parting;
+"I will try to call at your cottage before I get off. I am busy settling
+up some details now. Good day."
+
+I hastened home with my good news. Bessie's eyes glistened when she
+heard it, and even my mother-in-law showed a faint sign of pleasure at
+my good luck.
+
+The following Saturday evening Mr. Desmond came out to see us.
+
+"Don't consider this my farewell appearance," he said. "I merely wished
+to tell you that my friends have inveigled me into giving an informal
+party Tuesday evening, at which I shall expect you all to appear."
+
+He talked glibly, for him, and gave us an outline sketch of his proposed
+tour. I thought he seemed strangely restless and nervous, and I pitied
+him.
+
+His "informal party" was really a noteworthy affair, and the wealth and
+respectability of the city were well represented. Bessie could not go,
+on account of the baby, so I acted as escort to Mrs. Pinkerton, who made
+herself amazingly agreeable. There were not many young people present,
+and the affair was quiet and genteel in the extreme. Bank presidents,
+capitalists, professional men, and "solid" men, with their wives,
+attired in black silks, formed the majority of the guests. They were Mr.
+Desmond's personal friends. My mother-in-law was in congenial company,
+and I believe she enjoyed the evening remarkably. Most of the
+conversation turned, very naturally, upon European travel. Americans who
+are possessed of wealth always have done "the grand tour," and they
+invariably speak of "Europe" in a general way, as if it were all one
+country.
+
+"When I returned from my first tour abroad, a friend said to me that he
+'supposed it was a fine country over there,'" said Mr. Desmond to me,
+laughing.
+
+Some one asked him where he had decided to go.
+
+"I shall land at Havre, and go straight to Paris," he answered. "I
+flatter myself I am a good American, and as I have been comparatively
+dead since my niece left me, I am entitled to a place in that
+terrestrial paradise."
+
+I thought I had never seen Mrs. Pinkerton appear to so good advantage as
+she did on this occasion. Her natural good manners and her intelligence
+made her attractive in such a company, and she was the centre of a
+bright group of middle-aged Brahmins throughout the entire evening. Mr.
+Desmond appeared grateful for the assistance she rendered in making his
+party pass off pleasantly, and as for me, I began to feel that I had
+never quite appreciated her best qualities. She was a woman that one
+could not wholly know in a year, perhaps not in a lifetime. "Who knows?"
+I thought; "perhaps I have wronged my mother-in-law."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII.
+
+A SURPRISE.
+
+
+We were feeling a little solemn at the cottage. George, with his lively
+ways, and Clara, with her sparkling vivacity, were away on their wedding
+tour, and our good friend, Mr. Desmond, to whom we had taken a great
+liking, was about to sail for an indefinite absence in foreign lands.
+Though the mother-in-law's presence was less oppressive than formerly,
+there was now a pensiveness, an air of departed glory about it, that was
+not cheerful. There was danger of settling down to a humdrum sort of
+life, free from strife, perhaps, but at the same time devoid of that
+buoyancy which should make the home of a young couple joyous.
+
+I was a little doubtful of making a vacation in the country this summer.
+To be sure, when George went away, it was agreed that after he had gone
+the round of the White Mountains, the attractions of Canada, Niagara
+Falls, and Saratoga, he would return for a quiet stay of a few weeks, at
+the close of the season, to the little resort which we had visited a
+year ago, and there, if Bessie's health would permit, and I could
+arrange for a sufficient absence from business, we would join them. But
+I almost dreaded taking Mrs. Pinkerton with us, and doubted whether she
+would go; at the same time, I did not like to propose leaving her behind
+to take care of the cottage. I was in perplexity, and, notwithstanding
+my splendid new prospects in business, was not feeling cheerful.
+
+Coming home from a restless round of the city on the Fourth of July,
+where I had found the great national holiday a bore, I noticed Mr.
+Desmond's team coming up to the garden gate with a brisk turn. That fine
+old gentleman--I always feel like calling him old on account of his gray
+whiskers, though he was little more than fifty--came down the walk and
+with stately politeness assisted Bessie and the baby out of the
+carriage. I looked to see Mrs. Pinkerton follow, but she was not there,
+and clearly Mr. Desmond had not been to ride. It struck me as a little
+queer, not to say amusing, that they had been having a quiet
+_tete-a-tete_ together in the cottage while John gave Bessie and the
+baby their airing. But then, it was not so strange either, for was he
+not going to leave us in two days? It was no uncommon thing for Mrs.
+Pinkerton to stay within while Bessie was out, and he had probably
+dropped in late in the afternoon, expecting to find us all at home, as
+it was a holiday. I bade him good by in case I did not see him again, as
+he got into the carriage to ride back to the city.
+
+"Oh, I shall see you to-morrow," he said in a brisk tone which had not
+been habitual with him of late.
+
+That evening my mother-in-law was uncommonly gracious, a little
+absent-minded, and more pleasant in spirit than I had ever known her.
+She seemed to be filled with an inward satisfaction that I could not
+make out at all. Bessie and I both remarked it, but could not surmise
+any cause for the apparent change that had come over the spirit of her
+dream.
+
+Next morning, on reaching town, I found a note asking me to step over
+to Mr. Desmond's office when I could find time. I went at my leisure,
+wondering what was up. As I entered, he seemed remarkably cordial and
+happy.
+
+"I find that Blunt," he said in a business-like way, "would like to have
+you take hold at once, if possible. Their affairs are in some confusion
+and need an experienced hand to straighten them out. It will be
+necessary for you to give a bond, which I have here all prepared, with
+satisfactory sureties, and you need only give us your signature, which I
+will have properly witnessed on the spot."
+
+"Oh, is that it?" I thought. Strange I didn't think of its having
+something to do with my new position. I knew I could get away from my
+old place at a week's notice, as I had already made known my intention
+to leave, and there were several applicants for the position. The bond
+was executed without hesitation.
+
+"You will not lose your vacation," Mr. Desmond said, "though your salary
+will begin at once. As soon as you can get matters in order, which may
+take a month or more, you are to be allowed a few weeks' absence to
+recuperate and get fully prepared for your new responsibilities."
+
+Thanking him for his kindness, I was about to go, when he said, "Sit
+down, Mr. Travers. I have something else to say to you."
+
+"What's coming now?" I wondered, as I took my seat again. Mr. Desmond
+seemed a little at a loss how to begin his new communication, and came
+nearer appearing embarrassed than I should have thought possible for
+him.
+
+"The fact is," he said at last, "I have changed my mind about going
+abroad."
+
+I have no doubt I looked very much surprised and puzzled, and smiling at
+the expression of my face, he went on,--
+
+"Your mother-in-law, Mrs. Pinkerton, is a very worthy woman; in fact, a
+remarkably worthy woman."
+
+I couldn't deny that; but why should he choose such a time and place to
+compliment her?
+
+"Do you know," he added, with a still nearer approach to embarrassment
+in his manner, and something like a blush on his usually calm face, "I
+have asked her to become Mrs. Desmond."
+
+"The devil you have!" was my thought as astonishment fairly overcame
+me. I didn't say it, though, but it was my turn to be embarrassed, and I
+hardly knew what to say.
+
+Having got it out, Mr. Desmond fairly recovered his equanimity. "Yes,"
+he said, "I put the idea away from me for a long time, but it would
+persist in growing upon me, and I finally concluded that perhaps it
+might contribute to the happiness of _all_ parties, so I have taken the
+plunge. I hope you approve of it," he added, with a queer twinkle in his
+eye.
+
+"With all my heart, sir," I said earnestly; "and I am sure it will be as
+pleasing as it is surprising to us all."
+
+Throughout that afternoon I was restless, and eager to get home to tell
+Bessie the wonderful news. It was the longest afternoon I ever saw, but
+at length it passed and I hurried home. As Bessie met me at the door I
+said eagerly, "I've got a surprise for you, deary."
+
+Now I noticed for the first time that she was all smiles and full of
+something that she was eager to surprise me with. Simultaneously each
+recognized that the other had the secret already. Of course; what a
+fool I was! Her mother naturally enough would tell her while Mr. Desmond
+broke the matter to me.
+
+"Isn't it jolly?" I said.
+
+"Why, Charlie, are you then so anxious to get rid of poor, dear mamma?"
+she said, half reproachfully and half teasingly.
+
+"Oh, no, of course not, but it is really nice for all of us, isn't it
+now? She won't be far off, you know; we shall have our little home all
+to ourselves, and Mr. Desmond will be a sort of guardian for us. And as
+I said before, I think it is jolly."
+
+"Well, I must confess I do not altogether like the idea of mamma
+marrying again, and I shall miss her very much, after all."
+
+I couldn't help laughing at the little woman's demure countenance, as
+she said this. There was a little trace of jealousy in her gentle
+heart--jealousy so natural to women--at the idea of another's taking her
+mother off, just as that good woman had been jealous at her taking off.
+I accused her of it, and she repudiated the idea.
+
+But everybody must admit that things had fallen out just right for all
+parties, and the shadow was to be taken from our household by a new
+burst of sunlight, without any heart-burning for anybody, and with
+nothing but satisfaction for all. It was arranged that the new marriage
+should presently occur, and the mature couple take a little trip, and
+surprise George and Clara by being at the Fairview Hotel before them.
+Their first knowledge of the turn of affairs was to come when they
+arrived there late in August, and found their new relations in
+possession. Bessie and I were to join the party for a brief stay, and so
+my perplexity was happily ended.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV.
+
+A HAPPY PROSPECT.
+
+
+The landscape is lovely in these latter days of August. The mountains
+are grand and solemn in their everlasting silence. We are together at
+the Fairview, and everybody feels free and happy. There is no restraint,
+and our future prospects are delightful. Before George left home in June
+he had made application for a vacant chair in the Medical College and
+presented his credentials and testimonials. He expected nothing from it,
+he said, but would leave me to look out and see what decision was made.
+I had brought with me the news of his appointment. I had also secured
+for him the refusal of an elegant house which had been suddenly vacated
+and offered for sale on account of the failure in business of its owner.
+It was very near our cottage, had lovely surroundings, was beautifully
+furnished, and was to be sold with all its contents. It has now been
+decided between George and Mr. Desmond that it shall be purchased at
+once, and shall become the legal possession of Clara, being paid for out
+of her ample fortune, now under her own control, but not yet taken from
+her uncle's keeping.
+
+Mr. and Mrs. Desmond will take possession of the city mansion, and I
+have no doubt that its state and elegance will be fully kept up. I see
+before me happy times for us all, and at last I think we understand and
+appreciate each other. Our relations being properly and happily
+adjusted, there will be no more "unpleasantness." And I must acknowledge
+that, in spite of past feelings and the little clouds that have flecked
+our sky, sometimes appearing dark and portentous, these happy results
+are due in no small measure to MY MOTHER-IN-LAW.
+
+
+THE END.
+
+
+
+
+Transcriber's Note: The table below lists all corrections applied to
+the original text.
+
+p. 039: a hand encased in a mit -> mitt
+p. 128: [added quotes] better than any other of my sex?'
+p. 131: [added quotes] slink away in shame.'
+p. 133: [added quotes] _Que faire?_"
+p. 145: And Besssie sighed -> Bessie
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of That Mother-in-Law of Mine, by Anonymous
+
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