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diff --git a/30019-0.txt b/30019-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..bae5b8c --- /dev/null +++ b/30019-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,263 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 30019 *** + +[Illustration] + + + _The Army had a new theme song: "Anything + you can do, we can do better!" And they meant + _anything_, including up-to-date hornpipes!_ + + + NAVY DAY + + By Harry Harrison + + Illustrated by Kelly Freas + + +General Wingrove looked at the rows of faces without seeing them. His +vision went beyond the Congress of the United States, past the balmy +June day to another day that was coming. A day when the Army would have +its destined place of authority. + +He drew a deep breath and delivered what was perhaps the shortest speech +ever heard in the hallowed halls of Congress: + +"The General Staff of the U.S. Army requests Congress to abolish the +archaic branch of the armed forces known as the U.S. Navy." + +The aging Senator from Georgia checked his hearing aid to see if it was +in operating order, while the press box emptied itself in one concerted +rush and a clatter of running feet that died off in the direction of the +telephone room. A buzz of excited comment ran through the giant chamber. +One by one the heads turned to face the Naval section where rows of blue +figures stirred and buzzed like smoked-out bees. The knot of men around +a paunchy figure heavy with gold braid broke up and Admiral Fitzjames +climbed slowly to his feet. + +Lesser men have quailed before that piercing stare, but General Wingrove +was never the lesser man. The admiral tossed his head with disgust, +every line of his body denoting outraged dignity. He turned to his +audience, a small pulse beating in his forehead. + +"I cannot comprehend the general's attitude, nor can I understand why he +has attacked the Navy in this unwarranted fashion. The Navy has existed +and will always exist as the first barrier of American defense. I ask +you, gentlemen, to ignore this request as you would ignore the +statements of any person ... er, slightly demented. I should like to +offer a recommendation that the general's sanity be investigated, and an +inquiry be made as to the mental health of anyone else connected with +this preposterous proposal!" + +The general smiled calmly. "I understand, Admiral, and really don't +blame you for being slightly annoyed. But, please let us not bring this +issue of national importance down to a shallow personal level. The Army +has facts to back up this request--facts that shall be demonstrated +tomorrow morning." + +Turning his back on the raging admiral, General Wingrove included all +the assembled solons in one sweeping gesture. + +"Reserve your judgment until that time, gentlemen, make no hasty +judgments until you have seen the force of argument with which we back +up our request. It is the end of an era. In the morning the Navy joins +its fellow fossils, the dodo and the brontosaurus." + +The admiral's blood pressure mounted to a new record and the gentle thud +of his unconscious body striking the floor was the only sound to break +the shocked silence of the giant hall. + + * * * * * + +The early morning sun warmed the white marble of the Jefferson Memorial +and glinted from the soldiers' helmets and the roofs of the packed cars +that crowded forward in a slow-moving stream. All the gentlemen of +Congress were there, the passage of their cars cleared by the screaming +sirens of motorcycle policemen. Around and under the wheels of the +official cars pressed a solid wave of government workers and common +citizens of the capital city. The trucks of the radio and television +services pressed close, microphones and cameras extended. + +The stage was set for a great day. Neat rows of olive drab vehicles +curved along the water's edge. Jeeps and half-tracks shouldered close by +weapons carriers and six-bys, all of them shrinking to insignificance +beside the looming Patton tanks. A speakers' platform was set up in the +center of the line, near the audience. + +At precisely 10 a.m., General Wingrove stepped forward and scowled at +the crowd until they settled into an uncomfortable silence. His speech +was short and consisted of nothing more than amplifications of his +opening statement that actions speak louder than words. He pointed to +the first truck in line, a 2½-ton filled with an infantry squad sitting +stiffly at attention. + +The driver caught the signal and kicked the engine into life; with a +grind of gears it moved forward toward the river's edge. There was an +indrawn gasp from the crowd as the front wheels ground over the marble +parapet--then the truck was plunging down toward the muddy waters of the +Potomac. + +The wheels touched the water and the surface seemed to sink while taking +on a strange glassy character. The truck roared into high gear and rode +forward on the surface of the water surrounded by a saucer-shaped +depression. It parked two hundred yards off shore and the soldiers, +goaded by the sergeant's bark, leapt out and lined up with a showy +_present arms_. + +The general returned the salute and waved to the remaining vehicles. +They moved forward in a series of maneuvers that indicated a great +number of rehearsal hours on some hidden pond. The tanks rumbled slowly +over the water while the jeeps cut back and forth through their lines in +intricate patterns. The trucks backed and turned like puffing +ballerinas. + +The audience was rooted in a hushed silence, their eyeballs bulging. +They continued to watch the amazing display as General Wingrove spoke +again: + +"You see before you a typical example of Army ingenuity, developed in +Army laboratories. These motor units are supported on the surface of the +water by an intensifying of the surface tension in their immediate area. +Their weight is evenly distributed over the surface, causing the shallow +depressions you see around them. + +"This remarkable feat has been accomplished by the use of the +_Dornifier_. A remarkable invention that is named after that brilliant +scientist, Colonel Robert A. Dorn, Commander of the Brooke Point +Experimental Laboratory. It was there that one of the civilian employees +discovered the Dorn effect--under the Colonel's constant guidance, of +course. + +"Utilizing this invention the Army now becomes master of the sea as well +as the land. Army convoys of trucks and tanks can blanket the world. The +surface of the water is our highway, our motor park, our +battleground--the airfield and runway for our planes." + +Mechanics were pushing a Shooting Star onto the water. They stepped +clear as flame gushed from the tail pipe; with the familiar whooshing +rumble it sped down the Potomac and hurled itself into the air. + +"When this cheap and simple method of crossing oceans is adopted, it +will of course mean the end of that fantastic medieval anachronism, the +Navy. No need for billion-dollar aircraft carriers, battleships, +drydocks and all the other cumbersome junk that keeps those boats and +things afloat. Give the taxpayer back his hard-earned dollar!" + +Teeth grated in the Naval section as carriers and battleships were +called "boats" and the rest of America's sea might lumped under the +casual heading of "things." Lips were curled at the transparent appeal +to the taxpayer's pocketbook. But with leaden hearts they knew that all +this justified wrath and contempt would avail them nothing. This was +Army Day with a vengeance, and the doom of the Navy seemed inescapable. + +The Army had made elaborate plans for what they called "Operation +Sinker." Even as the general spoke the publicity mills ground into high +gear. From coast to coast the citizens absorbed the news with their +morning nourishment. + +"... Agnes, you hear what the radio said! The Army's gonna give a trip +around the world in a B-36 as first prize in this limerick contest. All +you have to do is fill in the last line, and mail one copy to the +Pentagon and the other to the Navy ..." + +The Naval mail room had standing orders to burn all the limericks when +they came in, but some of the newer men seemed to think the entire thing +was a big joke. Commander Bullman found one in the mess hall: + + _The Army will always be there, + On the land, on the sea, in the air. + So why should the Navy + Take all of the gravy ..._ + +to which a seagoing scribe had added: + + _And not give us ensigns our share?_ + +The newspapers were filled daily with photographs of mighty B-36's +landing on Lake Erie, and grinning soldiers making mock beachhead +attacks on Coney Island. Each man wore a buzzing black box at his waist +and walked on the bosom of the now quiet Atlantic like a biblical +prophet. + +Radio and television also carried the thousands of news releases that +poured in an unending flow from the Pentagon Building. Cards, letters, +telegrams and packages descended on Washington in an overwhelming +torrent. The Navy Department was the unhappy recipient of deprecatory +letters and a vast quantity of little cardboard battleships. + +The people spoke and their representatives listened closely. This was an +election year. There didn't seem to be much doubt as to the decision, +particularly when the reduction in the budget was considered. + +It took Congress only two months to make up its collective mind. The +people were all pro-Army. The novelty of the idea had fired their +imaginations. + +They were about to take the final vote in the lower house. If the +amendment passed it would go to the states for ratification, and their +votes were certain to follow that of Congress. The Navy had fought a +last-ditch battle to no avail. The balloting was going to be pretty much +of a sure thing--the wet water Navy would soon become ancient history. + +For some reason the admirals didn't look as unhappy as they should. + + * * * * * + +The Naval Department had requested one last opportunity to address the +Congress. Congress had patronizingly granted permission, for even the +doomed man is allowed one last speech. Admiral Fitzjames, who had +recovered from his choleric attack, was the appointed speaker. + +"Gentlemen of the Congress of the United States. We in the Navy have a +fighting tradition. We 'damn the torpedoes' and sail straight ahead into +the enemy's fire if that is necessary. We have been stabbed in the +back--we have suffered a second Pearl Harbor sneak attack! The Army +relinquished its rights to fair treatment with this attack. Therefore we +are _counter-attacking_!" Worn out by his attacking and mixed metaphors, +the Admiral mopped his brow. + +"Our laboratories have been working night and day on the perfection of a +device we hoped we would never be forced to use. It is now in operation, +having passed the final trials a few days ago. + +"The significance of this device _cannot_ be underestimated. We are so +positive of its importance that--we are _demanding_ that the _Army_ be +abolished!" + +He waved his hand toward the window and bellowed one word. + +"LOOK!" + +Everyone looked. They blinked and looked again. They rubbed their eyes +and kept looking. + +Sailing majestically up the middle of Constitution Avenue was the +battleship Missouri. + +The Admiral's voice rang through the room like a trumpet of victory. + +"The Mark-1 Debinder, as you see, temporarily lessens the binding +energies that hold molecules of solid matter together. Solids become +liquids, and a ship equipped with this device can sail anywhere in the +world--on sea _or_ land. Take your vote, gentlemen; the world awaits +your decision." + + ... THE END + + + + +Transcriber's Note: + + This etext was produced from _If Worlds of Science Fiction_ January + 1954. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. + copyright on this publication was renewed. Minor spelling and + typographical errors have been corrected without note. + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Navy Day, by Harry Harrison + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 30019 *** |