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+The Project Gutenberg Etext of Switzerland by Jacques Casanova
+#14 in our series by Jacques Casanova
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+Title: Switzerland
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+Author: Jacques Casanova
+
+Release Date: December, 2001  [Etext #2964]
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+The Project Gutenberg Etext of Switzerland by Jacques Casanova
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+
+MEMOIRS OF JACQUES CASANOVA de SEINGALT 1725-1798
+THE ETERNAL QUEST, Volume 3d--SWITZERLAND
+
+
+THE RARE UNABRIDGED LONDON EDITION OF 1894 TRANSLATED BY ARTHUR
+MACHEN TO WHICH HAS BEEN ADDED THE CHAPTERS DISCOVERED
+BY ARTHUR SYMONS.
+
+
+
+
+THE ETERNAL QUEST
+
+
+
+
+SWITZERLAND
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII
+
+I Resolve to Become a Monk--I go to Confession--Delay of a Fortnight
+--Giustiniani, the Apostle Capuchin--I Alter my Mind; My Reasons--My
+Pranks at the Inn--I Dine With the Abbot
+
+
+The cool way in which the abbot told these cock-and-bull stories gave
+me an inclination to laughter, which the holiness of the place and
+the laws of politeness had much difficulty in restraining.  All the
+same I listened with such an attentive air that his reverence was
+delighted with me and asked where I was staying.
+
+"Nowhere," said I;  "I came from Zurich on foot, and my first visit
+was to your church."
+
+I do not know whether I pronounced these words with an air of
+compunction, but the abbot joined his hands and lifted them to
+heaven, as if to thank God for touching my heart and bringing me
+there to lay down the burden of my sins.  I have no doubt that these
+were his thoughts, as I have always had the look of a great sinner.
+
+The abbot said it was near noon and that he hoped I would do him the
+honour of dining with him, and I accepted with pleasure, for I had
+had nothing to eat and I knew that there is usually good cheer in
+such places.  I did not know where I was and I did not care to ask,
+being willing to leave him under the impression that I was a pilgrim
+come to expiate my sins.
+
+On our way from the church the abbot told me that his monks were
+fasting, but that we should eat meat in virtue of a dispensation he
+had received from Benedict XIV., which allowed him to eat meat all
+the year round with his guests.  I replied that I would join him all
+the more willingly as the Holy Father had given me a similar
+dispensation.  This seemed to excite his curiosity about myself, and
+when we got to his room, which did not look the cell of a penitent,
+he hastened to shew me the brief, which he had framed and glazed and
+hung up opposite the table so that the curious and scrupulous might
+have it in full view.
+
+As the table was only laid for two, a servant in full livery came in
+and brought another cover; and the humble abbot then told me that he
+usually had his chancellor with him at dinner, "for," said he, "I
+have a chancery, since as abbot of Our Lady of Einsiedel I am a
+prince of the Holy Roman Empire."
+
+This was a relief to me, as I now knew where I was, and I no longer
+ran the risk of shewing my ignorance in the course of conversation.
+
+This monastery (of which I had heard before) was the Loretto of the
+Mountains, and was famous for the number of pilgrims who resorted to
+it.
+
+In the course of dinner the prince--abbot asked me where I came from,
+if I were married, if I intended to make a tour of Switzerland,
+adding that he should be glad to give me letters of introduction.
+I replied that I was a Venetian, a bachelor, and that I should be
+glad to accept the letters of introduction he had kindly offered me,
+after I had had a private conference with him, in which I desired to
+take his advice on my conscience.
+
+Thus, without premeditation, and scarcely knowing what I was saying,
+I engaged to confess to the abbot.
+
+This was my way.  Whenever I obeyed a spontaneous impulse, whenever I
+did anything of a sudden, I thought I was following the laws of my
+destiny, and yielding to a supreme will.  When I had thus plainly
+intimated to him that he was to be my confessor, he felt obliged to
+speak with religious fervour, and his discourses seemed tolerable
+enough during a delicate and appetising repast, for we had snipe and
+woodcock; which made me exclaim,--
+
+"What!  game like that at this time of year?"
+
+"It's a secret," said he, with a pleased smile, "which I shall be
+glad to communicate to you."
+
+The abbot was a man of taste, for though he affected sobriety he had
+the choicest wines and the most delicious dishes on the table.  A
+splendid salmon-trout was brought, which made him smile with
+pleasure, and seasoning the good fare with a jest, he said in Latin
+that we must taste it as it was fish, and that it was right to fast a
+little.
+
+While he was talking the abbot kept a keen eye on me, and as my fine
+dress made him feel certain that I had nothing to ask of him he spoke
+at ease.
+
+When dinner was over the chancellor bowed respectfully and went out.
+Soon after the abbot took me over the monastery, including the
+library, which contained a portrait of the Elector of Cologne in
+semi-ecclesiastical costume.  I told him that the portrait was a good
+though ugly likeness, and drew out of my pocket the gold snuffbox the
+prince had given me, telling him that it was a speaking likeness.  He
+looked at it with interest, and thought his highness had done well to
+be taken in the dress of a grand-master.  But I perceived that the
+elegance of the snuff-box did no harm to the opinion the abbot had
+conceived of me.  As for the library, if I had been alone it would
+have made me weep.  It contained nothing under the size of folio, the
+newest books were a hundred years old, and the subject-matter of all
+these huge books was solely theology and controversy.  There were
+Bibles, commentators, the Fathers, works on canon law in German,
+volumes of annals, and Hoffman's dictionary.
+
+"I suppose your monks have private libraries of their own," I said,
+"which contain accounts of travels, with historical and scientific
+works."
+
+"Not at all," he replied; "my monks are honest folk, who are content
+to do their duty, and to live in peace and sweet ignorance."
+
+I do not know what happened to me at that moment, but a strange whim
+came into my head--I would be a monk, too.  I said nothing about it
+at the moment, but I begged the abbot to take me to his private
+chamber.
+
+"I wish to make a general confession of all my sins," said I, "that I
+may obtain the benefit of absolution, and receive the Holy Eucharist
+on the morrow."
+
+He made no answer, but led the way to a pretty little room, and
+without requiring me to kneel down said he was ready to hear me.
+
+I sat down before him and for three consecutive hours I narrated
+scandalous histories unnumerable, which, however, I told simply and
+not spicily, since I felt ascetically disposed and obliged myself to
+speak with a contrition I did not feel, for when I recounted my
+follies I was very far from finding the remembrance of them
+disagreeable.
+
+In spite of that, the serene or reverend abbot believed, at all
+events, in my attrition, for he told me that since by the appointed
+means I had once more placed myself in a state of grace, contrition
+would be perfected in me.
+
+According to the good abbot, and still more according to me, without
+grace contrition is impossible.
+
+After he had pronounced the sacramental words which take away the
+sins of men, he advised me to retire to the chamber he had appointed
+for me, to pass the rest of the day in prayer, and to go to bed at an
+early hour, but he added that I could have supper if I was accustomed
+to that meal.  He told me that I might communicate at the first mass
+next morning, and with that we parted.
+
+I obeyed with a docility which has puzzled me ever since, but at the
+time I thought nothing of it.  I was left alone in a room which I did
+not even examine, and there I pondered over the idea which had come
+into my head before making my confession; and I quite made up my mind
+that chance, or rather my good genius, had led me to that spot, where
+happiness awaited me, and where I might shelter all my days from the
+tempests of the world.
+
+"Whether I stay here," said I, "depends on myself alone, as I am sure
+the abbot will not refuse me the cowl if I give him ten thousand
+crowns for my support."
+
+All that was needed to secure my happiness seemed a library of my own
+choosing, and I did not doubt but that the abbot would let me have
+what books I pleased if I promised to leave them to the monastery
+after my death.
+
+As to the society of the monks, the discord, envy, and all the
+bickerings inseparable from such a mode of life, I thought I had
+nothing to pass in that way, since I had no ambitions which could
+rouse the jealousy of the other monks.  Nevertheless, despite my
+fascination, I foresaw the possibility of repentance, and I shuddered
+at the thought, but I had a cure for that also.
+
+"When I ask for the habit," I said, "I will also ask that my
+novitiate be extended for ten years, and if repentance do not come in
+ten years it will not come at all.  I shall declare that I do not
+wish for any cure or any ecclesiastical dignity.  All I want is peace
+and leave to follow my own tastes, without scandalising anyone."
+I thought: I could easily remove any objections which might be made
+to the long term of my novitiate, by agreeing, in case I changed my
+mind, to forfeit the ten thousand crowns which I would pay in
+advance.
+
+I put down this fine idea in writing before I went to bed; and in the
+morning, finding myself unshaken in my resolve, after I had
+communicated I gave my plan to the abbot, who was taking chocolate in
+his room.
+
+He immediately read my plan, and without saying anything put it on
+the table, and after breakfast he walked up and down the room and
+read it again, and finally told me that he would give me an answer
+after dinner.
+
+I waited till night with the impatience of a child who has been
+promised toys on its birthday--so completely and suddenly can an
+infatuation change one's nature.  We had as good a dinner as on the
+day before, and when we had risen from the table the good abbot said,
+
+"My carriage is at the door to take you to Zurich.  Go, and let me
+have a fortnight to think it over.  I will bring my answer in person.
+In the meanwhile here are two sealed letters, which please deliver
+yourself."
+
+I replied that I would obey his instructions and that I would wait
+for him at the "Sword," in the hope that be would deign to grant my
+wishes.  I took his hand, which he allowed me to kiss, and I then set
+out for Zurich.
+
+As soon as my Spaniard saw me the rascal began to laugh.  I guessed
+what he was thinking, and asked him what he was laughing at.
+
+"I am amazed to see that no sooner do you arrive in Switzerland than
+you contrive to find some amusement which keeps you away for two
+whole days."
+
+"Ah, I see; go and tell the landlord that I shall want the use of a
+good carriage for the next fortnight, and also a guide on whom I can
+rely."
+
+My landlord, whose name was Ote, had been a captain, and was thought
+a great deal of at Zurich.  He told me that all the carriages in the
+neighbourhood were uncovered.  I said they would do, as there was
+nothing better to be had, and he informed me I could trust the
+servant he would provide me with.
+
+Next morning I took the abbot's letters.  One was for M. Orelli and
+the other for a M. Pestalozzi, neither of whom I found at home; but
+in the afternoon they both called on me, asked me to dinner, and made
+me promise to come with them the same evening to a concert.  This is
+the only species of entertainment allowed at Zurich, and only members
+of the musical society can be present, with the exception of
+strangers, who have to be introduced by a member, and are then
+admitted on the payment of a crown.  The two gentlemen both spoke in
+very high terms of the Abbot of Einsiedel.
+
+I thought the concert a bad one, and got bored at it.  The men sat on
+the right hand and the women on the left.  I was vexed with this
+arrangement, for in spite of my recent conversation I saw three or
+four ladies who pleased me, and whose eyes wandered a good deal in my
+direction.  I should have liked to make love to them, to make the
+best of my time before I became a monk.
+
+When the concert was over, men and women went out together, and the
+two citizens presented me to their wives and daughters, who looked
+pleasant, and were amongst those I had noticed.
+
+Courtesy is necessarily cut short in the street, and, after I had
+thanked the two gentlemen, I went home to the "Sword."
+
+Next day I dined with M. Orelli, and I had an opportunity for doing
+justice to his daughter's amiability without being able to let her
+perceive how she had impressed me.  The day after, I played the same
+part with M. Pestalozzi, although his charming daughter was pretty
+enough to excite my gallantry.  But to my own great astonishment I
+was a mirror of discretion, and in four days that was my character
+all over the town.  I was quite astonished to find myself accosted in
+quite a respectful manner, to which I was not accustomed; but in the
+pious state of mind I was in, this confirmed me in the belief that my
+idea of taking the cowl had been a Divine inspiration.  Nevertheless,
+I felt listless and weary, but I looked upon that as the inevitable
+consequence of so complete a change of life, and thought it would
+disappear when I grew more accustomed to goodness.
+
+In order to put myself, as soon as possible, on an equality with my
+future brethren, I passed three hours every morning in learning
+German.  My master was an extraordinary man, a native of Genoa, and
+an apostate Capuchin.  His name was Giustiniani.  The poor man, to
+whom I gave six francs every morning, looked upon me as an angel from
+heaven, although I, with the enthusiasm of a devotee, took him for a
+devil of hell, for he lost no opportunity of throwing a stone at the
+religious orders.  Those orders which had the highest reputation,
+were, according to him, the worst of all, since they led more people
+astray.  He styled monks in general as a vile rabble, the curse of
+the human race.
+
+"But," said I to him one day, "you will confess that Our Lady of
+Einsiedel .  .  ."
+
+"What!" replied the Genoese, without letting me finish my remark, "do
+you think I should make an exception in favour of a set of forty
+ignorant, lazy, vicious, idle, hypocritical scoundrels who live bad
+lives under the cloak of humility, and eat up the houses of the poor
+simpletons who provide for them, when they ought to be earning their
+own bread?"
+
+"But how about his reverend highness the abbot?"
+
+"A stuck-up peasant who plays the part of a prince, and is fool
+enough to think himself one."
+
+"But he is a prince."
+
+"As much a prince as I am.  I look upon him as a mere buffoon."
+
+"What has he done to you?"
+
+"Nothing; but he is a monk."
+
+"He is a friend of mine."
+
+"I cannot retract what I have said, but I beg your pardon."
+
+This Giustiniani had a great influence upon me, although I did not
+know it, for I thought my vocation was sure.  But my idea of becoming
+a monk at Einsiedel came to an end as follows:
+
+The day before the abbot was coming to see me, at about six o'clock
+in the evening, I was sitting at my window, which looked out on the
+bridge, and gazing at the passers-by, when all at once a carriage and
+four came up at a good pace and stopped at the inn.  There was no
+footman on it, and consequently the waiter came out and opened the
+door, and I saw four well-dressed women leave the carriage.  In the
+first three I saw nothing noticeable, but the fourth, who was dressed
+in a riding-habit, struck me at once with her elegance and beauty.
+She was a brunette with fine and well-set eyes, arched eyebrows, and
+a complexion in which the hues of the lily and the rose were mingled.
+Her bonnet was of blue satin with a silver fillet, which gave her an
+air I could not resist.  I stretched out from the window as far as I
+could, and she lifted her eyes and looked at me as if I had bade her
+do so.  My position obliged me to look at her for half a minute; too
+much for a modest woman, and more than was required to set me all
+ablaze.
+
+I ran and took up my position at the window of my ante-chamber, which
+commanded a view of the staircase, and before long I saw her running
+by to rejoin her three companions.  When she got opposite to my
+window she chanced to turn in that direction, and on seeing me cried
+out as if she had seen a ghost; but she soon recollected herself and
+ran away, laughing like a madcap, and rejoined the other ladies who
+were already in their room.
+
+Reader, put yourself in my place, and tell me how I could have
+avoided this meeting.  And you who would bury yourselves in monastic
+shades, persevere, if you can, after you have seen what I saw at
+Zurich on April 23rd.
+
+I was in such a state of excitement that I had to lie down on my bed.
+After resting a few minutes, I got up and almost unconsciously went
+towards the passage window and saw the waiter coming out of the
+ladies' room.
+
+"Waiter," said I, "I will take supper in the dining-room with
+everybody else."
+
+"If you want to see those ladies, that won't do, as they have ordered
+their supper to be brought up to them.  They want to go to bed in
+good time as they are to leave at day-break."
+
+"Where are they going?"
+
+"To Our Lady of Einsiedel to pay their vows."
+
+"Where do they come from?"
+
+"From Soleure."
+
+"What are their names?"
+
+"I don't know."
+
+I went to lie down again, and thought how I could approach the fair
+one of my thoughts.  Should I go to Einsiedel, too?  But what could I
+do when I got there?   These ladies are going to make their
+confessions; I could not get into the confessional.  What kind of a
+figure should I cut among the monks?   And if I were to meet the
+abbot on the way, how could I help returning with him?   If I had had
+a trusty friend I would have arranged an ambuscade and carried off my
+charmer.  It would have been an easy task, as she had nobody to
+defend her.  What if I were to pluck up my heart and beg them to let
+me sup in their company?   I was afraid of the three devotees; I
+should meet with a refusal.  I judged that my charmer's devotion was
+more a matter of form than any thing else, as her physiognomy
+declared her to be a lover of pleasure, and I had long been
+accustomed to read womens' characters by the play of their features.
+
+I did not know which way to turn, when a happy idea came into my
+head.  I went to the passage window and stayed there till the waiter
+went by.  I had him into the room, and began my discourse by sliding
+a piece of gold into his hand.  I then asked him to lend me his green
+apron, as I wished to wait upon the ladies at supper.
+
+"What are you laughing at?"
+
+"At your taking such a fancy, sir, though I think I know why."
+
+"You are a sharp fellow."
+
+"Yes, sir, as sharp as most of them; I will get you a new apron.  The
+pretty one asked me who you were."
+
+"What did you tell her?"
+
+"I said you were an Italian; that's all."
+
+"If you will hold your tongue I will double that piece of gold."
+
+"I have asked your Spaniard to help me, sir, as I am single-handed,
+and supper has to be served at the same time both upstairs and
+downstairs."
+
+"Very good; but the rascal mustn't come into the room or he would be
+sure to laugh.  Let him go to the kitchen, bring up the dishes, and
+leave them outside the door."
+
+The waiter went out, and returned soon after with the apron and Le
+Duc, to whom I explained in all seriousness what he had to do.  He
+laughed like a madman, but assured me he would follow my directions.
+I procured a carving-knife, tied my hair in a queue, took off my
+coat, and put on the apron over my scarlet waistcoat ornamented with
+gold lace.  I then looked at myself in the glass, and thought my
+appearance mean enough for the modest part I was about to play.  I
+was delighted at the prospect, and thought to myself that as the
+ladies came from Soleure they would speak French.
+
+Le Duc came to tell me that the waiter was going upstairs.  I went
+into the ladies' room and said, "Supper is about to be served,
+ladies."
+
+"Make haste about it, then," said the ugliest of them, "as we have
+got to rise before day-break."
+
+I placed the chairs round the table and glanced at my fair one, who
+looked petrified.  The waiter came in, and I helped him to put the
+dishes on the table, and he then said to me, "Do you stay here, as I
+have to go downstairs."
+
+I took a plate and stood behind a chair facing the lady, and without
+appearing to look at her I saw her perfectly, or rather I saw nothing
+else.  She was astonished the others did not give me a glance, and
+they could not have pleased me better.  After the soup I hurried to
+change her plate, and then did the same office for the rest: they
+helped themselves to the boiled beef.
+
+While they were eating, I took a boiled capon and cut it up in a
+masterly manner.
+
+"We have a waiter who knows his work," said the lady of my thoughts.
+
+"Have you been long at this inn?"
+
+"Only a few weeks, madam."
+
+"You wait very well."
+
+"Madam is very good."
+
+I had tucked in my superb ruffles of English point lace, but my
+frilled shirt front of the same material protruded slightly through
+my vest, which I had not buttoned carefully.  She saw it, and said,
+"Come here a moment."
+
+"What does madam require?"
+
+"Let me see it.  What beautiful lace!"
+
+"So I have been told, madam, but it is very old.  An Italian
+gentleman who was staying here made me a present of it."
+
+"You have ruffles of the same kind, I suppose?"
+
+"Yes, madam;" and so saying I stretched out my hand, unbuttoning my
+waistcoat.  She gently drew out the ruffle, and seemed to place
+herself in a position to intoxicate me with the sight of her charms,
+although she was tightly laced.  What an ecstatic moment!  I knew she
+had recognized me, and the thought that I could not carry the
+masquerade beyond a certain point was a veritable torment to me.
+
+When she had looked a long time, one of the others said,
+
+"You are certainly very curious, my dear, one would think you had
+never seen lace before."
+
+At this she blushed.
+
+When the supper was done, the three ugly ladies each went apart to
+undress, while I took away the dishes, and my heroine began to write.
+I confess that I was almost infatuated enough to think that she was
+writing to me; however, I had too high an opinion of her to entertain
+the idea.
+
+As soon as I had taken away the dishes, I stood by the door in the
+respectful manner becoming the occasion.
+
+"What are you waiting for?" she said.
+
+"For your orders, madam."
+
+"Thank you, I don't want anything."
+
+"Your boots, madam, you will like them removed before you retire."
+
+"True, but still I don't like to give you so much trouble."
+
+"I am here to attend on you, madam."
+
+So saying, I knelt on one knee before her, and slowly unplaced her
+boots while she continued writing.  I went farther; I unbuckled her
+garters, delighting in the contemplation and still more in the touch
+of her delicately-shaped legs, but too soon for me she turned her
+head, and said,
+
+"That will do, thank you.  I did not notice that you were giving
+yourself so much trouble.  We shall see you to-morrow evening."
+
+"Then you will sup here, ladies?"
+
+"Certainly."
+
+I took her boots away, and asked if I should lock the door.
+
+"No, my good fellow," said she, in the voice of a syren, "leave the
+key inside."
+
+Le Duc took the charmer's boots from me, and said, laughing,--
+
+"She has caught you."
+
+"What?"
+
+"I saw it all, sir, you played your part as well as any actor in
+Paris; and I am certain that she will give you a louis to-morrow, but
+if you don't hand it over to me I will blow on the whole thing."
+
+"That's enough, you rascal; get me my supper as quickly as possible."
+
+Such are the pleasures which old age no longer allows me to enjoy,
+except in my memory.  There are monsters who preach repentance, and
+philosophers who treat all pleasures as vanity.  Let them talk on.
+Repentance only befits crimes, and pleasures are realities, though
+all too fleeting.
+
+A happy dream made me pass the night with the fair lady; doubtless it
+was a delusion, but a delusion full of bliss.  What would I not give
+now for such dreams, which made my nights so sweet!
+
+Next morning at day-break I was at her door with her boots in my hand
+just as their coachman came to call them.  I asked them, as a matter
+of form, if they would have breakfast, and they replied merrily that
+they had made too good a supper to have any appetite at such an early
+hour.  I went out of the room to give them time to dress, but the
+door was half open, and I saw reflected in the glass the snow-white
+bosom of my fair one; it was an intoxicating sight.  When she had
+laced herself and put on her dress she called for her boots.  I asked
+if I should put them on, to which she consented with a good grace,
+and as she had green velvet breeches, she seemed to consider herself
+as almost a man.  And, after all, a waiter is not worth putting one's
+self out about.  All the worst for him if he dare conceive any hopes
+from the trifling concessions he receives.  His punishment will be
+severe, for who would have thought he could have presumed so far?
+As for me, I am now, sad to say, grown old, and enjoy some few
+privileges of this description, which I relish, though despising
+myself, and still more those who thus indulge me.
+
+After she had gone I went to sleep again, hoping to see her in the
+evening.  When I awoke I heard that the abbot of Einsiedel was at
+Zurich, and my landlord told me that his reverend highness would dine
+with me in my room.  I told him that I wished to treat the abbot
+well, and that he must set the best dinner he could for us.
+
+At noon the worthy prelate was shewn up to my room, and began by
+complimenting me on the good reputation I had at Zurich, saying that
+this made him believe that my vocation was a real one.
+
+"The following distich," he added, "should now become your motto:
+     "Inveni portum.  Spes et fortuna valete;
+     Nil mihi vobiscum est: ludite nuns alios."
+
+"That is a translation of two verses from Euripides," I answered;
+"but, my lord, they will not serve me, as I have changed my mind
+since yesterday."
+
+"I congratulate you," said he, "and I hope you will accomplish all
+your desires.  I may tell you confidentially that it is much easier
+to save one's soul in the world where one can do good to one's
+neighbours, than in the convent, where a man does no good to himself
+nor to anyone else."
+
+This was not speaking like the hypocrite Guistiniani had described to
+me; on the contrary, it was the language of a good and sensible man.
+
+We had a princely dinner, as my landlord had made each of the three
+courses a work of art.  The repast was enlivened by an interesting
+conversation, to which wit and humour were not lacking.  After coffee
+I thanked the abbot with the greatest respect, and accompanied him to
+his carriage, where the reverend father reiterated his offers of
+serving me, and thus, well pleased with one another, we parted.
+
+The presence and the conversation of this worthy priest had not for a
+moment distracted my thoughts from the pleasing object with which
+they were occupied.  So soon as the abbot had gone, I went to the
+bridge to await the blessed angel, who seemed to have been sent from
+Soleure with the express purpose of delivering me from the temptation
+to become a monk, which the devil had put into my heart.  Standing on
+the bridge I built many a fine castle in Spain, and about six in the
+evening I had the pleasure of seeing my fair traveller once more.  I
+hid myself so as to see without being seen.  I was greatly surprised
+to see them all four looking towards my window.  Their curiosity
+shewed me that the lady had told them of the secret, and with my
+astonishment there was some admixture of anger.  This was only
+natural, as I not only saw myself deprived of the hope of making any
+further advances, but I felt that I could no longer play my part of
+waiter with any confidence.  In spite of my love for the lady I would
+not for the world become the laughing-stock of her three plain
+companions.  If I had interested her in my favour, she would
+certainly not have divulged my secret, and I saw in her doing so
+proof positive that she did not want the jest to go any further, or
+rather of her want of that spirit so necessary to ensure the success
+of an intrigue.  If the three companions of my charmer had had
+anything attractive about them, I might possibly have persevered and
+defied misfortune; but in the same measure as beauty cheers my heart,
+ugliness depresses it.  Anticipating the melancholy which I foresaw
+would result from this disappointment, I went out with the idea of
+amusing myself, and happening to meet Giustiniani I told him of my
+misfortune, saying that I should not be sorry to make up for it by a
+couple of hours of the society of some mercenary beauty.
+
+"I will take you to a house," said he, "where you will find what you
+want.  Go up to the second floor and you will be well received by an
+old woman, if you whisper my name to her.  I dare not accompany you,
+as I am well known in the town and it might get me into trouble with
+the police, who are ridiculously strict in these matters.  Indeed I
+advise you to take care that nobody sees you going in."
+
+I followed the ex-Capuchin's advice and waited for the dusk of the
+evening.  I had a good reception, but the supper was poor, and the
+hours that I spent with two young girls of the working class were
+tedious.  They were pretty enough, but my head was full of my
+perfidious charmer, and besides, despite their neatness and
+prettiness, they were wanting in that grace which adds so many charms
+to pleasure.  The liberality of my payment, to which they were not
+accustomed, captivated the old woman, who said she would get me all
+the best stuff in the town; but she warned me to take care that
+nobody saw me going into her house.
+
+When I got back Le Duc told me that I had been wise to slip away, as
+my masquerade had become generally known, and the whole house,
+including the landlord, had been eagerly waiting to see me play the
+part of waiter.  "I took your place," he added.  "The lady who has
+taken your fancy is Madame----, and I must confess she is vastly
+fine."
+
+"Did she ask where the other waiter was?"
+
+"No, but the other ladies asked what had become of you several
+times."
+
+"And Madame said nothing?"
+
+"She didn't open her mouth, but looked sad and seemed to care for
+nothing, till I said you were away because you were ill."
+
+"That was stupid of you.  Why did you say that?"
+
+"I had to say something."
+
+"True.  Did you untie her shoe?"
+
+"No; she did not want me to do so."
+
+"Good.  Who told you her name?"
+
+"Her coachman.  She is just married to a man older than herself."
+
+I went to bed, but could only think of the indiscretion and sadness
+of my fair lady.  I could not reconcile the two traits in her
+character.  Next day, knowing that she would be starting early, I
+posted myself at the window to see her get into the carriage, but I
+took care to arrange the curtain in such a way that I could not be
+seen.  Madame was the last to get in, and pretending that she wanted
+to see if it rained, she took off her bonnet and lifted her head.
+Drawing the curtain with one hand, and taking off my cap with the
+other, I wafted her a kiss with the tips of my fingers.  In her turn
+she bowed graciously, returning my kiss with a good-natured smile.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV
+
+I Leave Zurich--Comic Adventure at Baden--Soleure--M. De Chavigni--
+M. and Madame * * * I Act in a Play--I Counterfeit Sickness to Attain
+Happiness
+
+
+M. Mote, my landlord, introduced his two sons to me.  He had brought
+them up like young princes.  In Switzerland, an inn-keeper is not
+always a man of no account.  There are many who are as much respected
+as people of far higher rank are in other countries.  But each
+country has its own manners.  My landlord did the honours of the
+table, and thought it no degradation to make his guests pay for the
+meal.  He was right; the only really degrading thing in the world is
+vice.  A Swiss landlord only takes the chief place at table to see
+that everyone is properly attended to.  If he have a son, he does not
+sit down with his father, but waits on the guests, with napkin in
+hand.  At Schaffhaus, my landlord's son, who was a captain in the
+Imperial army, stood behind my chair and changed my plate, while his
+father sat at the head of the table.  Anywhere else the son would
+have been waited on, but in his father's house he thought, and
+rightly, that it was an honour to wait.
+
+Such are Swiss customs, of which persons of superficial understanding
+very foolishly make a jest.  All the same, the vaunted honour and
+loyalty of the Swiss do not prevent them from fleecing strangers, at
+least as much as the Dutch, but the greenhorns who let themselves be
+cheated, learn thereby that it is well to bargain before-hand, and
+then they treat one well and charge reasonably.  In this way, when I
+was at Bale, I baffled the celebrated Imhoff, the landlord of the
+"Three Kings."
+
+M. Ote complimented me on my waiter's disguise, and said he was sorry
+not to have seen me officiating, nevertheless, he said he thought I
+was wise not to repeat the jest.  He thanked me for the honour I had
+done his house, and begged me to do him the additional favour of
+dining at his table some day before I left.  I answered that I would
+dine with him with pleasure that very day.  I did so, and was treated
+like a prince.
+
+The reader will have guessed that the last look my charmer gave me
+had not extinguished the fire which the first sight of her had
+kindled in my breast.  It had rather increased my flame by giving me
+hopes of being better acquainted with her; in short, it inspired me
+with the idea of going to Soleure in order to give a happy ending to
+the adventure.  I took a letter of credit on Geneva, and wrote to
+Madame d'Urfe, begging her to give me a written introduction, couched
+in strong terms to M. de Chavigni, the French ambassador, telling her
+that the interests of our order were highly involved in my knowing
+this diplomatist, and requesting her to address letters to me at the
+post office at Soleure.  I also wrote to the Duke of Wurtemburg, but
+had no answer from him, and indeed he must have found my epistle very
+unpleasant reading.
+
+I visited the old woman whom Giustiniani had told me of several times
+before I left Zurich, and although I ought to have been well
+satisfied as far as physical beauty was concerned, my enjoyment was
+very limited, as the nymphs I wooed only spoke Swiss dialect--a
+rugged corruption of German.  I have always found that love without
+speech gives little enjoyment, and I cannot imagine a more
+unsatisfactory mistress than a mute, were she as lovely as Venus
+herself.
+
+I had scarcely left Zurich when I was obliged to stop at Baden to
+have the carriage M. Ote had got me mended.  I might have started
+again at eleven, but on hearing that a young Polish lady on her way
+to Our Lady of Einseidel was to dine at the common table, I decided
+to wait; but I had my trouble for nothing, as she turned out to be
+quite unworthy of the delay.
+
+After dinner, while my horses were being put in, the host's daughter,
+a pretty girl enough, came into the room and made me waltz with her;
+it chanced to be a Sunday.  All at once her father came in, and the
+girl fled.
+
+"Sir," said the rascal, "you are condemned to pay a fine of one
+louis."
+
+"Why?"
+
+"For having danced on a holy day."
+
+"Get out; I won't pay."
+
+"You will pay, though," said he, shewing me a great parchment covered
+with writing I did not understand.
+
+"I will appeal."
+
+"To whom, sir?"
+
+"To the judge of the place."
+
+He left the room, and in a quarter of an hour I was told that the
+judge was waiting for me in an adjoining chamber.  I thought to
+myself that the judges were very polite in that part of the world,
+but when I got into the room I saw the rascally host buried in a wig
+and gown.
+
+"Sir," said he, "I am the judge."
+
+"Judge and plaintiff too, as far as I can see."
+
+He wrote in his book, confirming the sentence, and mulcting me in six
+francs for the costs of the case.
+
+"But if your daughter had not tempted me."  said I, "I should not have
+danced; she is therefore as guilty as I."
+
+"Very true, sir; here is a Louis for her."  So saying he took a Louis
+out of his pocket, put it into a desk beside him, and said; "Now
+yours."
+
+I began to laugh, paid my fine, and put off my departure till the
+morrow.
+
+As I was going to Lucerne I saw the apostolic nuncio (who invited me
+to dinner), and at Fribourg Comte d'Afri's young and charming wife;
+but at ten leagues from Soleure I was a witness of the following
+curious circumstances.
+
+I was stopping the night in a village, and had made friends with the
+surgeon, whom I had found at the inn, and while supper, which he was
+to share with me, was getting ready, we walked about the village
+together.  It was in the dusk of the evening, and at a distance of a
+hundred paces I saw a man climbing up the wall of a house, and
+finally vanishing through a window on the first floor.
+
+"That's a robber," said I, pointing him out to the surgeon.  He
+laughed and said,--
+
+"The custom may astonish you, but it is a common one in many parts of
+Switzerland.  The man you have just seen is a young lover who is
+going to pass the night with his future bride.  Next morning he will
+leave more ardent than before, as she will not allow him to go too
+far.  If she was weak enough to yield to his desires he would
+probably decline to marry her, and she would find it difficult to get
+married at all."
+
+At Soleure I found a letter from Madame d'Urfe, with an enclosure
+from the Duc de Choiseul to the ambassador, M. de Chavigni.  It was
+sealed, but the duke's name was written below the address.
+
+I made a Court toilet, took a coach, and went to call on the
+ambassador.  His excellency was not at home, so I left my card and
+the letter.  It was a feast-day, and I went to high mass, not so
+much, I confess, to seek for God as for my charmer, but she was not
+there.  After service I walked around the town, and on my return
+found an officer who asked me to dinner at the ambassador's.
+
+Madame d'Urfe said that on the receipt of my letter she had gone
+straightway to Versailles, and that with the help of Madame de
+Grammont she had got me an introduction of the kind I wanted.  This
+was good news for me, as I desired to cut an imposing figure at
+Soleure.  I had plenty of money, and I knew that this magic metal
+glittered in the eyes of all.  M. de Chavigni had been ambassador at
+Venice thirty years before, and I knew a number of anecdotes about
+his adventures there, and I was eager to see what I could make out of
+him.
+
+I went to his house at the time appointed, and found all his servants
+in full livery, which I looked upon as a happy omen.  My name was not
+announced, and I remarked that when I came in both sides of the door
+were opened for me by the page.  A fine old man came forward to meet
+me, and paying me many well-turned compliments introduced me to those
+present.  Then, with the delicate tact of the courtier, pretending
+not to recollect my name, he drew the Duc de Choiseul's letter from
+his pocket, and read aloud the paragraph in which the minister
+desired him to treat me with the utmost consideration.  He made me
+sit on an easy chair at his right hand, and asked me questions to
+which I could only answer that I was travelling for my pleasure, and
+that I considered the Swiss nation to be in many respects superior to
+all other nations whatsoever.
+
+Dinner was served, and his excellency set me on his right hand in a
+position of equal honour to his own.  We were sixteen in company, and
+behind every chair stood a magnificent lackey in the ambassador's
+livery.  In the course of conversation I got an opportunity of
+telling the ambassador that he was still spoken of at Venice with the
+utmost affection.
+
+"I shall always remember," he said, "the kindness with which the
+Venetians treated me; but tell me, I beg, the names of those
+gentlemen who still remember me; they must be quite old now."
+
+This was what I was waiting for.  M. de Malipiero had told me of
+certain events which had happened during the regency, and M. de
+Bragadin had informed me of the ambassador's amours with the
+celebrated Stringhetta.
+
+His excellency's fare was perfect, but in the pleasure of conversing
+I forgot that of eating.  I told all my anecdotes so racily that his
+features expressed the pleasure I was affording him, and when we rose
+from the table he shook me by the hand, and told me he had not had so
+agreeable a dinner since he had been at Soleure.
+
+"The recollection of my Venetian gallantries," said the worthy old
+man, "makes me recall many a happy moment; I feel quite young again."
+
+He embraced me, and bade me consider myself as one of his family
+during my stay at Soleure.
+
+After dinner he talked a good deal about Venice, praising the
+Government, and saying that there was not a town in the world where a
+man could fare better, provided he took care to get good oil and
+foreign wines.  About five o'clock he asked me to come for a drive
+with him, getting into the carriage first to give me the best place.
+
+We got out at a pretty country house where ices were served to us.
+On our way back he said that he had a large party every evening, and
+that he hoped I would do him the honour to be present whenever it
+suited my inclinations, assuring me that he would do his best to
+amuse me.  I was impatient to take part in the assembly, as I felt
+certain I should see my charmer there.  It was a vain hope, however,
+for I saw several ladies, some old and ugly, some passable, but not
+one pretty.
+
+Cards were produced, and I soon found myself at a table with a young
+lady of fair complexion and a plain-looking woman well advanced in
+years, who seemed, however, not to be destitute of wit.  Though I was
+looed I played on, and I lost five or six hundred fish without
+opening my lips.  When it came to a profit and loss account, the
+plain woman told me I owed three louis.
+
+"Three louis, madam."
+
+"Yes, sir; we have been playing at two sous the fish.  You thought,
+perhaps, we were playing for farthings."
+
+"On the contrary, I thought it was for francs, as I never play
+lower."  She did not answer this boast of mine, but she seemed
+annoyed.  On rejoining the company after this wearisome game, I
+proceeded to scrutinize all the ladies present rapidly but keenly,
+but I could not see her for whom I looked, and was on the point of
+leaving, when I happened to notice two ladies who were looking at me
+attentively.  I recognized them directly.  They were two of my fair
+one's companions, whom I had had the honour of waiting on at Zurich.
+I hurried off, pretending not to recognize them.
+
+Next day, a gentleman in the ambassador's suite came to tell me that
+his excellency was going to call on me.  I told him that I would not
+go out till I had the honour of receiving his master, and I conceived
+the idea of questioning him concerning that which lay next to my
+heart.  However, he spared me the trouble, as the reader will see for
+himself.
+
+I gave M. de Chavigni the best reception I could, and after we had
+discussed the weather he told me, with a smile, that he had the most
+ridiculous affair to broach to me, begging me to credit him when he
+said that he did not believe it for a moment.
+
+"Proceed, my lord."
+
+"Two ladies who saw you at my house yesterday told me in confidence,
+after you had gone, that I should do well to be on my guard, as you
+were the waiter in an inn at Zurich where they had stayed.  They
+added that they had seen the other waiter by the Aar, and that in all
+probability you had run away from the inn together; God alone knows
+why!  They said, furthermore, that you slipped away from my house
+yesterday as soon as you saw them.  I told them that even if you were
+not the bearer of a letter from his grace the Duc de Choiseul I
+should have been convinced that they were mistaken, and that they
+should dine with you to-day, if they would accept my invitation.  I
+also hinted that you might have merely disguised yourself as a waiter
+in the hopes of winning some favours from them, but they rejected the
+hypothesis as absurd, and said that you could carve a capon and
+change a plate dexterously enough, but were only a common waiter for
+all that, adding that with my permission they would compliment you on
+your skill to-day.
+
+"'Do so, by all means, ladies,' said I, "M. Casanova and myself will
+be highly amused.' And now do you mind telling me whether there be
+any foundation of truth in the whole story?"
+
+"Certainly, my lord, I will tell you all without reserve, but in
+confidence, as this ridiculous report may injure the honour of one
+who is dear to me, and whom I would not injure for the world."
+
+"It is true, then?  I am quite interested to hear all about it."
+
+"It is true to a certain extent; I hope you don't take me for the
+real waiter at the 'Sword.'"
+
+"Certainly not, but I supposed you played the part of waiter?"
+
+"Exactly.  Did they tell you that they were four in company."
+
+"Ah, I have got it!  Pretty Madame was one of the party.  That
+explains the riddle; now I understand everything.  But you were quite
+right in saying that discretion was needful; she has a perfectly
+blameless reputation."
+
+"Ah! I did not know that.  What happened was quite innocent, but it
+might be so garbled in the telling as to become prejudicial to the
+honour of a lady whose beauty struck me with admiration."
+
+I told him all the details of the case, adding that I had only come
+to Soleure in the hopes of succeeding in my suit.
+
+"If that prove an impossibility," said I, "I shall leave Soleure in
+three or four days; but I will first turn the three ugly companions
+of my charmer into ridicule.  They might have had sense enough to
+guess that the waiter's apron was only a disguise.  They can only
+pretend to be ignorant of the fact in the hope of getting some
+advantage over me, and injuring their friend, who was ill advised to
+let them into the secret."
+
+"Softly, softly, you go too fast and remind me of my own young days.
+Permit me to embrace you, your story has delighted me.  You shall not
+go away, you shall stay here and court your charmer.  To-day you can
+turn two mischievous women into ridicule, but do it in an easy way.
+The thing is so straightforward that M.---- will be the first to
+laugh at it.  His wife cannot be ignorant of your love for her, and I
+know enough of women to pronounce that your disguise cannot have
+displeased her.  She does know of your love?"
+
+"Undoubtedly."
+
+He went away laughing, and at the door of his coach embraced me for
+the third time.
+
+I could not doubt that my charmer had told the whole story to her
+three friends as they were returning from Einsiedel to Zurich, and
+this made the part they had played all the more ill-natured; but I
+felt that it was to my interest to let their malice pass for wit.
+
+I went to the ambassador's at half-past one, and after making my bow
+to him I proceeded to greet the company, and saw the two ladies.
+Thereupon, with a frank and generous air, I went up to the more
+malicious-looking of the two (she was lame, which may have made me
+think her more ill-looking) and asked if she recognized me.
+
+"You confess, then, that you are the waiter at the 'Sword'?"
+
+"Well, not quite that, madam, but I confess that I was the waiter for
+an hour, and that you cruelly disdained to address a single word to
+me, though I was only a waiter, because I longed for the bliss of
+seeing you.  But I hope I shall be a little more fortunate here, and
+that you will allow me to pay you my respectful homage."
+
+"This is very wonderful!  You played your part so well that the
+sharpest eye would have been deceived.  Now we shall see if you play
+your new part as well.  If you do me the honour to call on me I will
+give you a good welcome."
+
+After these complimentary speeches, the story became public property,
+and the whole table was amusing itself with it, when I had the
+happiness of seeing M.----  and Madame coming into the room.
+
+"There is the good-natured waiter," said she to her husband.
+
+The worthy man stepped forward, and politely thanked me for having
+done his wife the honour of taking off her boots.
+
+This told me that she had concealed nothing, and I was glad.  Dinner
+was served, M. de Chavigni made my charmer sit at his right hand, and
+I was placed between my two calumniators.  I was obliged to hide my
+game, so, although I disliked them intensely, I made love to them,
+hardly raising my eyes to glance at Madame , who looked ravishing.  I
+did not find her husband either as old or as jealous as I had
+expected.  The ambassador asked him and his wife to stay the evening
+to an impromptu ball, and then said, that in order for me to be able
+to tell the Duc de Choiseul that I was well amused at Soleure, he
+would be delighted to have a play, if Madame would act the fair
+'Ecossaise' again.  She said she should be delighted, but two more
+actors were wanted.
+
+"That is all right," said the kind old gentleman, "I will play
+Montrose."
+
+"And I, Murray," I remarked.
+
+My lame friend, angry at this arrangement, which only left her the
+very bad part of Lady Alton, could not help lancing a shaft at me.
+
+"Oh! why isn't there a waiter's part in the play?" said she, "you
+would play it so well."
+
+"That is well said, but I hope you will teach me to play Murray even
+better."
+
+Next morning, I got the words of my part, and the ambassador told me
+that the ball would be given in my honour.  After dinner I went to my
+inn, and after making an elaborate toilette I returned to the
+brilliant company.
+
+The ambassador begged me to open the ball, and introduced me to the
+highest born but not the most beautiful lady in the place.  I then
+danced with all the ladies present until the good-natured old man got
+me the object of my vows as a partner in the quadrilles, which he did
+so easily that no one could have made any remark.  "Lord Murray,"
+said he, "must dance with no one but Lindane."
+
+At the first pause I took the opportunity of saying that I had only
+come to Soleure for her sake, that it was for her sake that I had
+disguised myself at Zurich, and that I hoped she would permit me to
+pay my addresses to her.
+
+"I cannot invite you to my house," said she, "for certain sufficient
+reasons; but if you will stay here some time we shall be able to see
+each other.  But I entreat you not to shew me any marked attention in
+public, for there are those who will spy upon our actions, and it is
+not pleasant to be talked about.
+
+I was quite satisfied with this, and told her that I would do all in
+my power to please her, and that the most prying eyes should have
+nothing to fix on.  I felt that the pleasure I looked forward to
+would be rendered all the sweeter by a tincture of mystery.
+
+I had proclaimed myself as a novice in the mimic art, and had
+entreated my lame friend to be kind enough to instruct me.  I
+therefore went to her in the morning, but she could only flatter
+herself that hers was a reflected light, as I had opportunities for
+paying my court to my charmer in her house, and however great her
+vanity may have been, she must have had some suspicions of the truth.
+
+This woman was a widow, aged between thirty and forty years, of a
+jaundiced complexion, and a piercing and malicious aspect.  In her
+efforts to hide the inequality of her legs, she walked with a stiff
+and awkward air; and, wishing to be thought a wit, she increased her
+natural dullness by a ceaseless flow of small talk.  I persisted in
+behaving towards her with a great air of respect, and one day she
+said that, having seen me in the disguise of a waiter, she would not
+have thought I was a man of a timid nature.
+
+"In what respect do you think me timid?" said I; to which she gave me
+no answer, but I knew perfectly well what she meant.  I was tired of
+my part, and I had determined to play it no more when we had acted
+L'Ecossaise.
+
+All the best people at Soleure were present at our first performance.
+The lame lady was delighted with the horror inspired by her acting;
+but she might credit a great deal of it to her appearance.  M. de
+Chavigni drew forth the tears of the audience, his acting was said to
+be better than the great Voltaire's.  As for me, I remember how near
+I was to fainting when, in the third scene of the fifth act, Lindane
+said to me,
+
+"What!  You!  You dare to love me?"
+
+She pronounced these words with such fiery scorn that all the
+spectators applauded vehemently.  I was almost put out of
+countenance, for I thought I detected in her voice an insult to my
+honour.  However, I collected myself in the minute's respite which
+the loud applause gave me, and I replied,---
+
+"Yes; I adore you!  How should I not?"
+
+So pathetically and tenderly did I pronounce these words that the
+hall rang again with the applause, and the encores from four hundred
+throats made me repeat the words which, indeed, came from my heart.
+
+In spite of the pleasure we had given to the audience, we judged
+ourselves not perfect in our parts, and M. de Chavigni advised us to
+put off our second performance for a couple of days.
+
+"We will have a rehearsal to-morrow at my country house," said he,
+"and I beg the favour of all your companies to dinner there."
+
+However, we all made each other compliments on our acting.  My lame
+friend told me I had played well, but not so well as in the part of
+waiter, which really suited me admirably.  This sarcasm got the laugh
+on her side, but I returned it by telling her that my performance was
+a work of art, while her playing of Lady Alton was pure nature.
+M. de Chavigni told Madame that the spectators were wrong to applaud
+when she expressed her wonder at my loving her, since she had spoken
+the words disdainfully; and it was impossible that Lindane could have
+despised Murray.  The ambassador called for me the next day in his
+carriage, and when we reached his country-house we found all the
+actors assembled there.  His excellency addressed himself in the
+first place to M.----, telling him he thought his business was as
+good as done, and that  they would talk about it after dinner. We sat
+down to table, and afterwards rehearsed the piece without any need of
+the prompter's assistance.
+
+Towards evening the ambassador told the company that he would expect
+them to supper that evening at Soleure, and everyone left with the
+exception of the ambassador, myself, and M.---- and Madame----.  Just
+as we were going I had an agreeable surprise.
+
+"Will you come with me," said the Ambassador to M.---- , "we can talk
+the matter over at our ease?   M. Casanova will have the honour of
+keeping your wife company in your carriage."
+
+I gave the fair lady my hand respectfully, and she took it with an
+air of indifference, but as I was helping her in she pressed my hand
+with all her might.  The reader can imagine how that pressure made my
+blood circulate like fire in my veins.
+
+Thus we were seated side by side, our knees pressed tenderly against
+each other.  Half an hour seemed like a minute, but it must not be
+thought that we wasted the time.  Our lips were glued together, and
+were not set apart till we came within ten paces of the ambassador's
+house, which I could have wished at ten leagues distance.  She was
+the first to get down, and I was alarmed to see the violent blush
+which overspread her whole face.  Such redness looked unnatural; it
+might betray us; our spring of happiness would soon be dry.  The
+watchful eye of the envious Alton would be fixed upon us, and not in
+vain; her triumph would outweigh her humiliation.  I was at my wits'
+end.
+
+Love and luck, which have so favoured me throughout the course of my
+life, came to my aid.  I had about me a small box containing
+hellebore.  I opened it as if by instinct, and invited her to take a
+small pinch.  She did so, and I followed her example; but the dose
+was too strong, and as we were going up the stairs we began to
+sneeze, and for the next quarter of an hour we continued sneezing.
+People were obliged to attribute her high colour to the sneezing, or
+at least no one could give voice to any other suppositions.  When the
+sneezing fit was over, this woman, who was as clever as she was
+pretty, said her headache was gone, but she would take care another
+time not to take so strong a dose.  I looked out of the corner of my
+eye at the malicious widow, who said nothing but seemed deep in
+thought.
+
+This piece of good luck decided me on staying at Soleure till my love
+was crowned with success, and I determined to take a country house.
+I shall not have much opinion of my readers if they find themselves
+in my position--rich, young, independent, full of fire, and having
+only pleasure to seek for--and do not follow my example.  A perfect
+beauty was before me with whom I was madly in love, and who, I was
+sure, shared that love.  I had plenty of money, and I was my own
+master.  I thought this a much better plan than turning monk, and I
+was above caring "what people would say."  As soon as the ambassador
+had returned, which he always did at an early hour on account of his
+advanced age, I left the company and went to see him in his private
+room.  In truth I felt I must give him that confidence which he had
+so well deserved.
+
+As soon as he saw me he said,--
+
+"Well, well, did you profit by the interview I got you?"
+
+I embraced him, and said,--
+
+"I may hope for everything."
+
+When I was telling him about the hellebore he was lavish in his
+compliments on my presence of mind, for, as he said, such an unusual
+colour would have made people think there had been some kind of a
+combat--a supposition which would not have tended towards my success.
+After I had told him all, I imparted my plan.
+
+"I shall do nothing in a hurry," said I, "as I have to take care that
+the lady's honour does not suffer, and I trust to time to see the
+accomplishment of my wishes.  I shall want a pretty country house, a
+good carriage, two lackeys, a good cook, and a housekeeper.  All that
+I leave to your excellency, as I look upon you as my refuge and
+guardian angel."
+
+"To-morrow, without fail, I will see what I can do, and I have good
+hopes of doing you a considerable service and of rendering you well
+content with the attractions of Soleure."
+
+Next day our rehearsal went off admirably, and the day after the
+ambassador spoke to me as follows:
+
+"So far as I can see, what you are aiming at in this intrigue is the
+satisfying of your desires without doing any harm to the lady's
+reputation.  I think I know the nature of your love for her well
+enough to say that if she told you that your leaving Soleure was
+necessary to her peace of mind you would leave her at once.  You see
+that I have sounded you well enough to be a competent adviser in this
+delicate and important affair, to which the most famous events in the
+annals of diplomacy are not to be compared."
+
+"Your excellency does not do sufficient justice to a career which has
+gained you such distinction."
+
+"That's because I am an old man, my dear fellow, and have shaken off
+the rust and dust of prejudices, and am able to see things as they
+really are, and appreciate them at their true value.  But let us
+return to your love-affair.  If you wish to keep it in the dark, you
+must avoid with the greatest care any action which may awaken
+suspicion in the minds of people who do not believe that anything is
+indifferent.  The most malicious and censorious will not be able to
+get anything but the merest chance out of the interview I procured
+you today, and the accident of the sneezing bout, defy the most ill-
+natured to draw any deductions; for an eager lover does not begin his
+suit by sending the beloved one into convulsions.  Nobody can guess
+that your hellebore was used to conceal the blush that your caresses
+occasioned, since it does not often happen that an amorous combat
+leaves such traces; and how can you be expected to have foreseen the
+lady's blushes, and to have provided yourself with a specific against
+them?   In short, the events of to-day will not disclose your secret.
+M.---- who, although he wishes to pass for a man devoid of jealousy,
+is a little jealous; M.----  himself cannot have seen anything out of
+the common in my asking him to return with me, as I had business of
+importance with him, and he has certainly no reasons for supposing
+that I should be likely to help you to intrigue with his wife.
+Furthermore, the laws of politeness would have forbidden me, under
+any circumstances, offering the lady the place I offered him, and as
+he prides himself on his politeness he can raise no possible
+objection to the arrangement which was made.  To be sure I am old and
+you are young--a distinction not unimportant in a husband's eyes.
+"After this exordium," added the good-natured ambassador, with a
+laugh, "an exordium which I have delivered in the official style of a
+secretary of state, let us see where we are.  Two things are
+necessary for you to obtain your wished-for bliss.  The first thing,
+which concerns you more particularly, is to make M.----  your friend,
+and to conceal from him that you have conceived a passion for his
+wife, and here I will aid you to the best of my ability.  The second
+point concerns the lady's honour; all your relations with her must
+appear open and above-board.  Consider yourself under my protection;
+you must not even take a country house before we have found out some
+plan for throwing dust into the eyes of the observant.  However, you
+need not be anxious; I have hit upon a plan.
+
+"You must pretend to be taken ill, but your illness must be of such a
+kind that your doctor will be obliged to take your word for the
+symptoms.  Luckily, I know a doctor whose sole idea is to order
+country air for all complaints.  This physician, who is about as
+clever as his brethren, and kills or cures as well as any of them,
+will come and feel my pulse one of these days.  You must take his
+advice, and for a couple of louis he will write you a prescription
+with country air as the chief item.  He will then inform everybody
+that your case is serious, but that he will answer for your cure."
+
+"What is his name?"
+
+"Doctor Herrenschwand."
+
+"What is he doing here?  I knew him at Paris; he was Madame du
+Rumain's doctor."
+
+"That is his brother.  Now find out some polite complaint, which will
+do you credit with the public.  It will be easy enough to find a
+house, and I will get you an excellent cook to make your gruel and
+beef-tea."
+
+The choice of a complaint cost me some thought; I had to give it a
+good deal of attention.  The same evening I managed to communicate my
+plan to Madame who approved of it.  I begged her to think of some way
+of writing to me, and she said she would.
+
+"My husband," said she, "has a very high opinion of you.  He has
+taken no offence at our coming in the same carriage.  But tell me,
+was it an accident or design that made M. de Chavigni take my husband
+and leave us together?"
+
+"It was the result of design, dearest."  She raised her beautiful
+eyes and bit her lips.  "Are you sorry it was so?"
+
+"Alas! no."
+
+In three or four days, on the day on which we were going to act
+L'Ecossaise, the doctor came to dine with the ambassador and stayed
+till the evening to see the play.  At dessert he complimented me on
+my good health, on which I took the opportunity, and told him that
+appearances were deceitful, and that I should be glad to consult him
+the next day.  No doubt he was delighted to be deceived in his
+estimate of my health, and he said he should be glad if he could be
+of any service.  He called on me at the hour agreed upon, and I told
+him such symptoms as my fancy dictated; amongst other things, that I
+was subject to certain nocturnal irritations which made me extremely
+weak, especially in the reins.
+
+"Quite so, quite so; it's a troublesome thing, but we will see what
+can be done.  My first remedy, which you may possibly not care much
+for, is for you to pass six weeks in the country, where you will not
+see those objects which impress your brain, acting on the seventh
+pair of nerves, and causing that lumbar discharge which no doubt
+leaves you in a very depressed state."
+
+"Yes, it certainly does."
+
+"Quite so, quite so.  My next remedy is cold bathing."
+
+"Are the baths far from here?"
+
+"They are wherever you like.  I will write you a prescription, and
+the druggist will make it up."
+
+I thanked him, and after he had pouched the double-louis I slipped
+politely into his hand, he went away assuring me that I should soon
+experience an improvement in my health.  By the evening the whole
+town knew that I was ill and had to go into the country.  M. de
+Chavigni said pleasantly at dinner to the doctor, that he should have
+forbidden me all feminine visitors; and my lame friend, refining on
+the idea, added that I should above all be debarred access to certain
+portraits, of which I had a box-full.  I laughed approvingly, and
+begged M. de Chavigni, in the presence of the company, to help me to
+find a pretty house and a good cook, as I did not intend to take my
+meals alone.
+
+I was tired of playing a wearisome part, and had left off going to
+see my lame friend, but she soon reproached me for my inconstancy,
+telling me that I had made a tool of her.  "I know all," said this
+malicious woman, "and I will be avenged."
+
+"You cannot be avenged for nothing," said I, "for I have never done
+you an injury.  However, if you intend to have me assassinated, I
+shall apply for police protection."
+
+"We don't assassinate here," said she, savagely.  "We are not
+Italians."
+
+I was delighted to be relieved from the burden of her society, and
+henceforth Madame was the sole object of my thoughts.  M. de
+Chavigni, who seemed to delight in serving me, made her husband
+believe that I was the only person who could get the Duc de Choiseul
+to pardon a cousin of his who was in the guards, and had had the
+misfortune to kill his man in a duel.  "This," said the kindly old
+gentleman, "is the best way possible of gaining the friendship of
+your rival.  Do you think you can manage it?"
+
+"I am not positive of success."
+
+"Perhaps I have gone a little too far; but I told him that by means
+of your acquaintance with the Duchesse de Grammont you could do
+anything with the minister."
+
+"I must make you a true prophet; I will do all I can."
+
+The consequence was that M.----  informed me of the facts in the
+ambassador's presence, and brought me all the papers relative to the
+case.
+
+I spent the night in writing to the Duchesse de Grammont.  I made my
+letter as pathetic as possible, with a view to touching her heart,
+and then her father's; and I then wrote to the worthy Madame d'Urfe
+telling her that the well-being of the sublime order of the Rosy
+Cross was concerned in the pardon of a Swiss officer, who had been
+obliged to leave the kingdom on account of a duel in which the order
+was highly concerned.
+
+In the morning, after resting for an hour, I went to the ambassador,
+and shewed him the letter I had written to the duchess.  He thought
+it excellently expressed, and advised me to skew it to M.----  I
+found him with his night-cap on; he was extremely grateful for the
+interest I took in a matter which was so near to his heart.  He told
+me that his wife had not yet risen, and asked me to wait and take
+breakfast with her.  I should have much liked to accept the
+invitation, but I begged him to make my excuses to his lady for my
+absence, on the pretence that I had to finish my letters, and hand
+them to the courier who was just leaving.  I hoped in this way to
+scatter any jealousy that might be hovering in his brain, by the
+slight importance I attached to a meeting with his wife.
+
+I went to dine with M. de Chavigni, who thought my conduct had been
+very politic, and said that he was certain that henceforth M.----
+would be my best friend.  He then skewed me a letter from Voltaire
+thanking him for playing Montrose in his Ecossaise; and another from
+the Marquis de Chauvelin, who was then at Delices with the
+philosopher of Ferney.  He promised to come and see him after he had
+been to Turin, where he had been appointed ambassador.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XV
+
+My Country House--Madame Dubois--Malicious Trick Played on Me by My
+Lame Enemy--My Vexation
+
+There was a reception and a supper at the Court, as they styled the
+hotel of M. de Chavigni, or rather of the ambassador of the King of
+France in Switzerland.  As I came in I saw my charmer sitting apart
+reading a letter.  I accosted her, apologizing for not having stayed
+to breakfast, but she said I had done quite right, adding that if I
+had not chosen a country house she hoped I would take one her husband
+would probably mention to me that evening.  She could not say any
+more, as she was called away to a game at quadrille.  For my part I
+did not play, but wandered from one table to another.
+
+At supper everybody talked to me about my health, and my approaching
+stay in the country.  This gave M.---- an opportunity to mention a
+delightful house near the Aar; "but," he added, "it is not to be let
+for less than six months."
+
+"If I like it," I replied, "and am free to leave it when I please, I
+will willingly pay the six months' rent in advance."
+
+"There is a fine hall in it."
+
+"All the better; I will give a ball as evidence of my gratitude to
+the people of Soleure for the kind welcome I have received from
+them."
+
+"Would you like to come and see it to-morrow?"
+
+"With pleasure."
+
+"Very good, then I will call for you at eight o'clock, if that hour
+will suit you."
+
+"I shall expect you."
+
+When I got back to my lodging I ordered a travelling carriage and
+four, and the next morning, before eight o'clock, I called for M.
+who was ready, and seemed flattered at my anticipating him.
+
+"I made my wife promise to come with us; but she is a sluggard, who
+prefers her bed to the fresh air."
+
+In less than an hour we reached our journey's end, and I found the
+house a beautiful one and large enough to lodge the whole court of a
+prince of the Holy Roman Empire.  Besides the hall, which I thought
+magnificent, I noted with great pleasure a closet arranged as a
+boudoir, and covered with the most exquisite pictures.  A fine
+garden, fountains, baths, several well-furnished rooms, a good
+kitchen--in a word, everything pleased me, and I begged M.---- to
+arrange for me to take up my abode there in two days' time.
+
+When we got back to Soleure, Madame told me how pleased she was that
+I liked the house; and seizing the opportunity, I said that I hoped
+they would often do me the honour of dining with me.  They promised
+they would do so.  I drew from my pocket a packet containing a
+hundred louis, which I gave M.----  to pay the rent.  I then embraced
+him, and after imprinting a respectful kiss on the hand of his fair
+mate I went to M. de Chavigni, who approved of my having taken the
+house as it pleased my lady, and asked me if it was true that I was
+going to give a ball.
+
+"Yes, if I see any prospect of its being a brilliant one, and if I
+have your approbation."
+
+"You need have no doubts on that point, my dear fellow, and whatever
+you can't find in the shops come to me for.  Come, I see you are
+going to spend a little money.  It is a good plan, and overcomes many
+difficulties.  In the meanwhile you shall have two footmen, an
+excellent cook, a housekeeper, and whatever other servants you
+require.  The head of my household will pay them, and you can settle
+with him afterwards, he is a trustworthy man.  I will come now and
+then and take a spoonful of soup with you, and you shall reward me
+for what services I may have done you by telling me how things are
+getting on.  I have a great esteem for your charming friend, her
+discretion is beyond her years, and the pledges of love you will
+obtain of her will doubtless increase your passion and your esteem.
+Is she aware that I know all?"
+
+"She knows that we are firm friends, and she is glad of it, as she is
+sure that you will be discreet."
+
+"She may count on my discretion.  She is really a delicious woman; I
+should have been tempted to seduce her myself thirty years ago."
+
+A druggist, whom the doctor had recommended to me, set out the same
+day to get ready the baths which were to cure me of my imaginary
+complaint, and in two days I went myself, after having given Le Duc
+orders to bring my baggage on.
+
+I was extremely surprised, on entering the apartment I was to occupy,
+to see a pretty young woman who came up to me in a modest way to kiss
+my hand.  I stopped her doing so, and my astonished air made her
+blush.
+
+"Do you belong to the household?" I said.
+
+"The ambassador's steward has engaged me as your housekeeper."
+
+"Pardon my surprise.  Take me to my room."
+
+She obeyed, and sitting down on the couch I begged her to sit beside
+me.
+
+"That is an honour," said she, in the most polite and modest way,
+"I cannot allow myself.  I am only your servant."
+
+"Very good, but when I am alone I hope you will consent to take your
+meals with me, as I don't like eating by myself."
+
+"I will do so, sir."
+
+"Where is your room?"
+
+"This is the one the steward assigned to me, but you have only to
+speak if you wish me to sleep in another."
+
+"Not at all; it will do very well."
+
+Her room was just behind the recess in which my bed stood.  I went in
+with her and was astonished to see a great display of dresses, and in
+an adjoining closet all the array of the toilette, linen in
+abundance, and a good stock of shoes and embroidered slippers.  Dumb
+with surprise I looked at her, and was thoroughly satisfied with what
+I saw.  Nevertheless I determined to subject her to a close
+examination, as I thought her manners too interesting and her linen
+too extensive for her to be a mere servant.  All at once I was struck
+with the idea that it might be a trick of the ambassador's, for a
+fine woman, well educated, and aged twenty-four or at the most
+twenty-five years, seemed to me more fitted to be my mistress than my
+housekeeper.  I therefore asked her if she knew the ambassador, and
+what wages she was to receive.  She replied that she only knew M. de
+Chavigni by sight, and that the steward had promised her two louis a
+month and her meals in her own room.
+
+"Where do you come from?   What's your name?"
+
+"I come from Lyons; I am a widow, and my name is Dubois."
+
+"I am delighted to have you in my service.  I shall see you again."
+
+She then left me, and I could not help thinking her a very
+interesting woman, as her speech was as dignified as her appearance.
+I went down to the kitchen and found the cook, an honest-looking
+fellow, who told me his name was Rosier.  I had known his brother in
+the service of the French ambassador at Venice.  He told me that
+supper would be ready at nine o'clock.
+
+"I never eat by myself," said I.
+
+"So I hear, sir; and I will serve supper accordingly."
+
+"What are your wages?"
+
+"Four louis a month."
+
+I then went to see the rest of my people.  I found two sharp-looking
+footmen, and the first of them told me he would see I had what wine I
+wanted.  Then I inspected my bath, which seemed convenient.  An
+apothecary was preparing certain matters for my imaginary cure.
+Finally, I took a walk round my garden, and before going in I went
+into the gate-keeper's, where I found a numerous family, and some
+girls who were not to be despised.  I was delighted to hear everybody
+speak French, and I talked with them some time.
+
+When I got back to my room, I found Le Duc occupied in unpacking my
+mails; and telling him to give my linen to Madame Dubois, I went into
+a pretty cabinet adjoining, where there was a desk and all materials
+necessary for writing.  This closet had only one window facing north,
+but it commanded a view capable of inspiring the finest thoughts.  I
+was amusing myself with the contemplation of this sublime prospect,
+when I heard a knock at my door.  It was my pretty housekeeper, who
+wore a modest and pleasant expression, and did not in the least
+resemble a person who bears a complaint.
+
+"What can I do for you, madam?"
+
+"I hope you will be good enough to order your man to be polite to
+me?"
+
+"Certainly; how has he failed in politeness?"
+
+"He might possibly tell you in no respect.  He wanted to kiss me, and
+as I refused he thought himself justified in being rather insolent."
+
+"How?"
+
+"By laughing at me.  You will pardon me, sir, but I do not like
+people who make game."
+
+"You are right; they are sure to be either silly or malicious.  Make
+yourself easy; Le Duc shall understand that you are to be treated
+with respect.  You will please sup with me."
+
+Le Duc came in soon after, and I told him to behave respectfully
+towards Madame Dubois.
+
+"She's a sly cat," said the rascal; "she wouldn't let me kiss her."
+
+"I am afraid you are a bad fellow."
+
+"Is she your servant or your mistress?"
+
+"She might be my wife."
+
+"Oh! well, that's different.  That will do; Madame Dubois shall have
+all respect, and I will try my luck somewhere else."
+
+I had a delicious supper.  I was contented with my cook, my butler,
+my housekeeper, and even with my Spaniard, who waited capitally at
+table.
+
+After supper I sent out Le Duc and the other servant, and as soon as
+I was alone with my too lovely housekeeper, who had behaved at table
+like a woman of the world, I begged her to tell me her history.
+
+"My history, sir, is short enough, and not very interesting.  I was--
+born at Lyons, and my relations took me to Lausanne, as I have been
+told, for I was too young at the time to remember anything about it.
+My father, who was in the service of Madame d'Ermance, left me an
+orphan when I was fourteen.  Madame d'Ermance was fond of me, and
+knowing that my mother's means were small she took me to live with
+her.  I had attained my seventeenth year when I entered the service
+of Lady Montagu as lady's maid, and some time after I was married to
+Dubois, an old servant of the house.  We went to England, and three
+years after my marriage I lost my husband.  The climate of England
+affected my lungs, and I was obliged to beg my lady to allow me to
+leave her service.  The worthy lady saw how weak I was, and paid the
+expenses of my journey and loaded me with rich presents.  I returned
+to my mother at Lausanne, where my health soon returned, and I went
+into the service of an English lady who was very fond of me, and
+would have taken me with her to Italy if she had not conceived some
+suspicions about the young Duke of Rosebury, with whom she was in
+love, and whom she thought in love with me.  She suspected me, but
+wrongfully, of being her rival in secret.  She sent me away, after
+giving me rich presents, and saying how sorry she was she could not
+keep me.  I went back to my mother, and for two years I have lived
+with the toil of my hands.  Four days ago M. Lebel, the ambassador's
+steward, asked me if I would enter the service of an Italian
+gentleman as housekeeper.  I agreed, in the hope of seeing Italy, and
+this hope is the cause of my stupidity.  In short: here I am."
+
+"What stupidity are you referring to?"
+
+"The stupidity of having entered your service before I knew you."
+
+"I like your freedom.  You would not have come, then, if you had not
+known me?"
+
+"Certainly not, for no lady will ever take me after having been with
+you."
+
+"Why not? may I ask."
+
+"Well, sir; do you think you are the kind of man to have a house-
+keeper like myself without the public believing my situation to be of
+quite a different nature?"
+
+"No, you are too pretty, and I don't look like a fossil, certainly;
+but after all, what matter does it make?"
+
+"It is all very well for you to make light of it, and if I were in
+your place I would do the same; but how am I, who am a woman and not
+in an independent position, to set myself above the rules and
+regulations of society?"
+
+"You mean, Madame Dubois, that you would very much like to go back to
+Lausanne?"
+
+"Not exactly, as that would not be just to you."
+
+"How so?"
+
+"People would be sure to say that either your words or your deeds
+were too free, and you might possibly pass a rather uncharitable
+judgment on me."
+
+"What judgment could I pass on you?"
+
+"You might think I wanted to impose on you."
+
+"That might be, as I should be very much hurt by so sudden and
+uncalled-for a departure.  All the same I am sorry for you, as with
+your ideas you can neither go nor stay with any satisfaction.
+Nevertheless, you must do one or the other."
+
+"I have made up my mind.  I shall stay, and I am almost certain I
+shall not regret it."
+
+"I am glad to hear that, but there is one point to which I wish to
+call your attention."
+
+"What is that?"
+
+"I will tell you.  Let us have no melancholy and no scruples."
+
+"You shall not see me melancholy, I promise you; but kindly explain
+what you mean by the word 'scruples.'"
+
+"Certainly.  In its ordinary acceptation, the word 'scruple'
+signifies a malicious and superstitious whim, which pronounces an
+action which may be innocent to be guilty."
+
+"When a course of action seems doubtful to me, I never look upon the
+worst side of it.  Besides, it is my duty to look after myself and
+not other people."
+
+"I see you have read a good deal."
+
+"Reading is my greatest luxury.  Without books I should find life
+unbearable."
+
+"Have you any books?"
+
+"A good many.  Do you understand English?"
+
+"Not a word."
+
+"I am sorry for that, as the English books would amuse you."
+
+"I do not care for romances."
+
+"Nor do I.  But you don't think that there are only romances in
+English, do you?   I like that.  Why do you take me for such a lover
+of the romantic, pray?"
+
+"I like that, too.  That pretty outburst is quite to my taste, and I
+am delighted to be the first to make you laugh."
+
+"Pardon me if I laugh, but .  . ."
+
+"But me no buts, my dear; laugh away just as you like, you will find
+that the best way to get over me.  I really think, though, that you
+put your services at too cheap a rate."
+
+"That makes me laugh again, as it is for you to increase my wages if
+you like."
+
+"I shall take care that it is done."
+
+I rose from table, not taken, but surprised, with this young woman,
+who seemed to be getting on my blind side.  She reasoned well, and in
+this first interview she had made a deep impression on me.  She was
+young, pretty, elegant, intellectual, and of distinguished manners; I
+could not guess what would be the end of our connection.  I longed to
+speak to M. Lebel, to thank him for getting me such a marvel, and
+still more, to ask him some questions about her.
+
+After the supper had been taken away, she came to ask if I would have
+my hair put in curl papers.
+
+"It's Le Duc's business," I answered, "but if you like, it shall be
+yours for the future."
+
+She acquitted herself like an expert.
+
+"I see," said I, "that you are going to serve me as you served Lady
+Montagu."
+
+"Not altogether; but as you do not like melancholy, allow me to ask a
+favour."
+
+"Do so, my dear."
+
+"Please do not ask me to give you your bath."
+
+"Upon my honour, I did not think of doing so.  It would be
+scandalous.  That's Le Duc's business."
+
+"Pardon me, and allow me to ask another favour."
+
+"Tell me everything you want."
+
+"Allow me to have one of the door-keeper's daughters to sleep with
+me."
+
+"If it had come into my head, I would have proposed it to you.  Is
+she in your room now?"
+
+"No."
+
+"Go and call her, then."
+
+"Let us leave that till to-morrow, as if I went at this time of night
+it might make people talk."
+
+"I see you have a store of discretion, and you may be sure I will not
+deprive you of any of it."
+
+She helped me to undress, and must have found me very modest, but I
+must say it was not from virtue.  My heart was engaged elsewhere, and
+Madame Dubois had impressed me; I was possibly duped by her, but I
+did not trouble myself to think whether I was or not.  I rang for Le
+Duc in the morning, and on coming in he said he had not expected the
+honour.
+
+"You're a rascal," I said, "get two cups of chocolate ready directly
+after I have had my bath."
+
+After I had taken my first cold bath, which I greatly enjoyed, I went
+to bed again.  Madame Dubois came in smiling, dressed in a style of
+careless elegance.
+
+"You look in good spirits."
+
+"I am, because I am happy with you.  I have had a good night, and
+there is now in my room a girl as lovely as an angel, who is to sleep
+with me."
+
+"Call her in."
+
+She called her, and a monster of ugliness entered, who made me turn
+my head away.
+
+"You haven't given yourself a rival certainly, my dear, but if she
+suits you it is all right.  You shall have your breakfast with me,
+and I hope you will take chocolate with me every morning."
+
+"I shall be delighted, as I am very fond of it."
+
+I had a pleasant afternoon.  M. de Chavigni spent several hours with
+me.  He was pleased with everything, and above all with my fair
+housekeeper, of whom Lebel had said nothing to him.
+
+"She will be an excellent cure for your love for Madame," said he.
+
+"There you are wrong," I answered, "she might make me fall in love
+with her without any diminution of my affection for my charmer."
+
+Next day, just as I was sitting down to table with my housekeeper, I
+saw a carriage coming into the courtyard, and my detestable lame
+widow getting out of it.  I was terribly put out, but the rules of
+politeness compelled me to go and receive her.
+
+"I was far from anticipating that you would do me so great an honour,
+madam."
+
+"I daresay; I have come to dine with you, and to ask you to do me a
+favour."
+
+"Come in, then, dinner is just being served.  I beg to introduce
+Madame Dubois to you."
+
+I turned towards my charming housekeeper, and told her that the lady
+would dine with us.
+
+Madame Dubois, in the character of mistress of the house, did the
+honours admirably, and my lame friend, in spite of her pride, was
+very polite to her.  I did not speak a dozen words during the meal,
+and paid no sort of attention to the detestable creature; but I was
+anxious to know what she could want me to do for her.  As soon as
+Madame Dubois had left the room she told me straight out that she had
+come to ask me to let her have a couple of rooms in my house for
+three weeks or a month at the most.
+
+I was astonished at such a piece of impudence, and told her she asked
+more than I was at liberty to give.
+
+"You can't refuse me, as everybody knows I have come on purpose to
+ask you."
+
+"Then everybody must know that I have refused you.  I want to be
+alone--absolutely alone, without any kind of restriction on my
+liberty.  The least suspicion of company would bore me."
+
+"I shall not bore you in any way, and you will be at perfect liberty
+to ignore my presence.  I shall not be offended if you don't enquire
+after me, and I shall not ask after you--even if you are ill.  I
+shall have my meals served to me by my own servant, and I shall take
+care not to walk in the garden unless I am perfectly certain you are
+not there.  You must allow that if you have any claims to politeness
+you cannot refuse me."
+
+"If you were acquainted with the most ordinary rules of politeness,
+madam, you would not persist in a request to which I have formally
+declined to accede."
+
+She did not answer, but my words had evidently produced no effect.
+I was choking with rage.  I strode up and down the room, and felt
+inclined to send her away by force as a madwoman.  However, I
+reflected that she had relations in a good position whom I might
+offend if I treated her roughly, and that I might make an enemy
+capable of exacting a terrible revenge; and, finally, that Madame
+might disapprove of my using violence to this hideous harpy....
+
+"Well, madam," said I, "you shall have the apartment you have
+solicited with so much importunity, and an hour after you come in I
+shall be on my way back to Soleure."
+
+"I accept the apartment, and I shall occupy it the day after to-
+morrow.  As for your threat of returning to Soleure, it is an idle
+one, as you would thereby make yourself the laughing-stock of the
+whole town."
+
+With this final impertinence she rose and went away, without taking
+any further notice of me.  I let her go without moving from my seat.
+I was stupefied.  I repented of having given in; such impudence was
+unparalleled.  I called myself a fool, and vowed I deserved to be
+publicly hooted.  I ought to have taken the whole thing as a jest; to
+have contrived to get her out of the house on some pretext, and then
+to have sent her about her business as a madwoman, calling all my
+servants as witnesses.
+
+My dear Dubois came in, and I told my tale.  She was thunderstruck.
+
+"I can hardly credit her requesting, or your granting, such a thing,"
+said she, "unless you have some motives of your own."
+
+I saw the force of her argument, and not wishing to make a confidante
+of her I held my tongue, and went out to work off my bile.
+
+I came in tired, after taking a stiff walk.  I took supper with
+Madame Dubois, and we sat at table till midnight.  Her conversation
+pleased me more and more; her mind was well-furnished, her speech
+elegant, and she told her stories and cracked her jokes with charming
+grace.  She was devoid of prejudices, but by no means devoid of
+principle.  Her discretion was rather the result of system than of
+virtue; but if she had not a virtuous spirit, her system would not
+have shielded her from the storms of passion or the seductions of
+vice.
+
+My encounter with the impudent widow had so affected me that I could
+not resist going at an early hour on the following day to communicate
+it to M. de Chavigni.  I warned Madame Dubois that if I were not back
+by dinner-time she was not to wait for me.
+
+M. de Chavigni had been told by my enemy that she was going to pay me
+a visit, but he roared with laughter on hearing the steps she had
+taken to gain her ends.
+
+"Your excellency may find it very funny," said I, "but I don't."
+
+"So I see; but take my advice, and be the first to laugh at the
+adventure.  Behave as if you were unaware of her presence, and that
+will be a sufficient punishment for her.  People will soon say she is
+smitten with you, and that you disdain her love.  Go and tell the
+story to M.----, and stay without ceremony to dinner.  I have spoken
+to Lebel about your pretty housekeeper: the worthy man had no
+malicious intent in sending her to you.  He happened to be going to
+Lausanne, and just before, I had told him to find you a good
+housekeeper; thinking it over on his way, he remembered his friend
+Madame Dubois, and the matter was thus arranged without malice or
+pretense.  She is a regular find, a perfect jewel for you, and if you
+get taken with her I don't think she will allow you to languish for
+long."
+
+"I don't know, she seems to be a woman of principle."
+
+"I shouldn't have thought you would be taken in by that sort of
+thing.  I will ask you both to give me a dinner to-morrow, and shall
+be glad to hear her chatter."
+
+M---- welcomed me most kindly, and congratulated me on my conquest,
+which would make my country house a paradise.  I joined in the jest,
+of course, with the more ease that his charming wife, though I could
+see that she suspected the truth, added her congratulations to those
+of her husband; but I soon changed the course of their friendly mirth
+by telling them the circumstances of the case.  They were indignant
+enough then, and the husband said that if she had really quartered
+herself on me in that fashion, all I had to do was to get an
+injunction from the courts forbidding her to put her foot within my
+doors.
+
+"I don't want to do that," said I, "as besides publicly disgracing
+her I should be skewing my own weakness, and proclaiming that I was
+not the master in my own house, and that I could not prevent her
+establishing herself with me."
+
+"I think so, too," said the wife, "and I am glad you gave way to her.
+That shews how polite you are, and I shall go and call on her to
+congratulate her on the welcome she got, as she told me that her
+plans had succeeded."
+
+Here the matter ended, and I accepted their invitation to dine with
+them.  I behaved as a friend, but with that subtle politeness which
+takes away all ground for suspicion; accordingly, the husband felt no
+alarm.  My charmer found the opportunity to tell me that I had done
+wisely in yielding to the ill-timed demand of that harpy, and that as
+soon as M. de Chauvelin, whom they were expecting, had gone away
+again, I could ask her husband to spend a few days with me, and that
+she would doubtless come too.
+
+"Your door-keeper's wife," she added, "was my nurse.  I have been
+kind to her, and when necessary I can write to you by her without
+running any risk."
+
+After calling on two Italian Jesuits who were passing through
+Soleure, and inviting them to dine with me on the following day, I
+returned home where the good Dubois amused me till midnight by
+philosophical discussions.  She admired Locke; and maintained that
+the faculty of thought was not a proof of the existence of spirit in
+us, as it was in the power of God to endow matter with the capacity
+for thought; I was unable to controvert this position.  She made me
+laugh by saying that there was a great difference between thinking
+and reasoning, and I had the courage to say,--
+
+"I think you would reason well if you let yourself be persuaded to
+sleep with me, and you think you reason well in refusing to be so
+persuaded."
+
+"Trust me, sir," said she; "there is as much difference between the
+reasoning powers of men and women as there is between their physical
+characteristics."
+
+Next morning at nine o'clock we were taking our chocolate, when my
+enemy arrived.  I heard her carriage, but I did not take the
+slightest notice.  The villainous woman sent away the carriage and
+installed herself in her room with her maid.
+
+I had sent Le Duc to Soleure for my letters, so I was obliged to beg
+my housekeeper to do my hair; and she did it admirably, as I told her
+we should have the ambassador and the two Jesuits to dinner.  I
+thanked her, and kissed her for the first time on the cheek, as she
+would not allow me to touch her beautiful lips.  I felt that we were
+fast falling in love with one another, but we continued to keep
+ourselves under control, a task which was much easier for her than
+for me, as she was helped by that spirit of coquetry natural to the
+fair sex, which often has greater power over them than love itself.
+
+M. de Chavigni came at two; I had consulted him before asking the
+Jesuits, and had sent my carriage for them.  While we were waiting
+for these gentlemen we took a turn in the garden, and M. de Chavigni
+begged my fair housekeeper to join us as soon as she had discharged
+certain petty duties in which she was then engaged.
+
+M. de Chavigni was one of those men who were sent by France to such
+powers as she wished to cajole and to win over to her interests.
+M. de l'Hopital, who knew how to gain the heart of Elizabeth
+Petrovna, was another; the Duc de Nivernois, who did what he liked
+with the Court of St. James's in 1762, is a third instance.
+
+Madame Dubois came out to us in due course, and entertained us very
+agreeably; and M. de Chavigni told me that he considered she had all
+the qualities which would make a man happy.  At dinner she enchanted
+him and captivated the two Jesuits by her delicate and subtle wit.
+In the evening this delightful old nobleman told me he had spent a
+most pleasant day, and after asking me to dine at his house while M.
+de Chauvelin was there, he left me with an effusive embrace.
+
+M. de Chauvelin, whom I had the honour to know at Versailles, at M.
+de Choiseul's, was an extremely pleasant man.  He arrived at Soleure
+in the course of two days, and M. de Chavigni having advised me of
+his presence I hastened to pay my court to him.  He remembered me,
+and introduced me to his wife, whom I had not the honour of knowing.
+As chance placed me next to my charmer at table, my spirits rose, and
+my numerous jests and stories put everybody in a good temper.  On M.
+de Chauvelin remarking that he knew some pleasant histories of which
+I was the hero, M. de Chavigni told him that he did not know the best
+of all, and recounted to him my adventure at Zurich.  M. de Chauvelin
+then told Madame that to serve her he would willingly transform
+himself into a footman, on which M. ---- joined in and said that I
+had a finer taste for beauty, as she, for whose sake I had made
+myself into a waiter, was at that moment a guest of mine in my
+country house.
+
+"Ah, indeed!" said M.  de Chauvelin, "then we must come and see your
+quarters, M. Casanova."
+
+I was going to reply, when M. de Chavigni anticipated me by saying,
+
+"Yes, indeed! and I hope he will lend me his beautiful hall to give
+you a ball next Sunday."
+
+In this manner the good-natured courtier prevented me from promising
+to give a ball myself, and relieved me of my foolish boast, which I
+should have been wrong in carrying out, as it would have been an
+encroachment on his privilege as ambassador of entertaining these
+distinguished strangers during the five or six days they might stay
+at Soleure.  Besides, if I had kept to my word, it would have
+involved me in a considerable expense, which would not have helped me
+in my suit.
+
+The conversation turning on Voltaire, the Ecossaise was mentioned,
+and the acting of my neighbour was highly commended in words that
+made her blush and shine in her beauty like a star, whereat her
+praises were renewed.
+
+After dinner the ambassador invited us to his ball on the day after
+the morrow, and I went home more deeply in love than ever with my
+dear charmer, whom Heaven had designed to inflict on me the greatest
+grief I have had in my life, as the reader shall see.
+
+I found that my housekeeper had gone to bed, and I was glad of it,
+for the presence of my fair one had excited my passions to such an
+extent that my reason might have failed to keep me within the bounds
+of respect.  Next morning she found me sad, and rallied me in such a
+way that I soon recovered my spirits.  While we were taking our
+chocolate the lame creature's maid brought me a note, and I sent her
+away, telling her that I would send the answer by my own servant.
+This curious letter ran as follows:
+
+"The ambassador has asked me to his ball on Sunday.  I answered that
+I was not well, but if I found myself better in the evening I would
+come.  I think that as I am staying in your house I ought to be
+introduced by you or stay away altogether.  So if you do not wish to
+oblige me by taking me, I must beg of you to tell the ambassador that
+I am ill.  Pardon me if I have taken the liberty of infringing our
+agreement in this peculiar instance, but it is a question of keeping
+up some sort of appearance in public."
+
+"Not so," I cried, mad with rage; and taking my pen I wrote thus:
+
+"I think your idea is a beautiful one, madam.  You will have to be
+ill, as I mean to keep to the conditions you made yourself, and to
+enjoy full liberty in all things, and I shall therefore deny myself
+the honour of taking you to the ball which the ambassador is to give
+in my hall."
+
+I read her insolent letter and my reply to my housekeeper, who
+thought the answer just what she deserved.  I then sent it to her.
+
+I passed the next two days quietly and agreeably without going out or
+seeing any visitors, but the society of Madame Dubois was all-
+sufficient for me.  Early on Sunday morning the ambassador's people
+came to make the necessary preparations for the ball and supper.
+Lebel came to pay me his respects while I was at table.  I made him
+sit down, while I thanked him for procuring me a housekeeper who was
+all perfection.
+
+Lebel was a fine man, middle-aged, witty, and an excellent steward,
+though perfectly honest.
+
+"Which of you two," said he to me, "is the most taken in?"
+
+"We are equally pleased with each other," answered my charming
+housekeeper.
+
+To my great delight the first pair to appear were M.---- and Madame.
+She was extremely polite to Madame Dubois, and did not shew the
+slightest astonishment when I introduced her as my housekeeper.  She
+told me that I must take her to see her lame friend, and to my great
+disgust I had to go.  We were received with a show of great
+friendship, and she went out with us into the garden, taking M.----'s
+arm, while his wife leant amorously on mine.
+
+When we had made a few turns of the garden, Madame begged me to take
+her to her nurse.  As her husband was close by, I said,--
+
+"Who is your nurse?"
+
+"Your door-keeper's wife," said her husband, "we will wait for you in
+this lady's apartment."
+
+"Tell me, sweetheart," said she on the way, "does not your pretty
+housekeeper sleep with you?"
+
+"I swear she does not; I can only love you."
+
+"I would like to believe you, but I find it hard to do so; however,
+if you are speaking the truth it is wrong of you to keep her in the
+house, as nobody will believe in your innocence."
+
+"It is enough for me that you believe in it.  I admire her, and at
+any other time I expect we could not sleep under the same roof
+without sleeping in the same bed; but now that you rule my heart I am
+not capable of a passion for her."
+
+"I am delighted to hear it; but I think she is very pretty."
+
+We went in to see her nurse, who called her "my child," and kissed
+her again and again, and then left us alone to prepare some lemonade
+for us.  As soon as we found ourselves alone our mouths were glued
+together, and my hands touched a thousand beauties, covered only by a
+dress of light sarcenet; but I could not enjoy her charms without
+this cruel robe, which was all the worse because it did not conceal
+the loveliness beneath it.  I am sure that the good nurse would have
+kept us waiting a long time if she had known how we longed to be left
+alone for a few moments longer; but, alas! the celerity with which
+she made those two glasses of lemonade was unexampled.
+
+"It was made beforehand, was it?" said I, when I saw her coming in.
+
+"Not at all, sir; but I am a quick hand."
+
+"You are, indeed."
+
+These words made my charmer go off into a peal of laughter, which she
+accompanied with a significant glance in my direction.  As we were
+going away she said that as things seemed to be against us we must
+wait till her husband came to spend a few days with me.
+
+My terrible enemy gave us some sweets, which she praised very highly,
+and above all some quince marmalade, which she insisted on our
+testing.  We begged to be excused, and Madame pressed my foot with
+hers.  When we had got away she told me I had been very wise not to
+touch anything, as the widow was suspected of having poisoned her
+husband.
+
+The ball, the supper, the refreshments, and the guests were all of
+the most exquisite and agreeable kind.  I only danced one minuet with
+Madame de Chauvelin, nearly all my evening being taken up with
+talking to her husband.  I made him a present of my translation of
+his poem on the seven deadly sins, which he received with much
+pleasure.
+
+"I intend," said I, "to pay you a visit at Turin."
+
+"Are you going to bring your housekeeper with you?"
+
+"No."
+
+"You are wrong, for she is a delightful person."
+
+Everybody spoke of my dear Dubois in the same way.  She had a perfect
+knowledge of the rules of good breeding, and she knew how to make
+herself respected without being guilty of the slightest presumption.
+In vain she was urged to dance, and she afterwards told me that if
+she had yielded she would have become an object of hatred to all the
+ladies.  She knew that she could dance exquisitely.
+
+M. de Chauvelin went away in two days, and towards the end of the
+week I heard from Madame d'Urfe, who told me that she had spent two
+days at Versailles in furtherance of my desires.  She sent me a copy
+of the letters of pardon signed by the king in favour of the relation
+of M.----, assuring me that the original had been sent to the colonel
+of his regiment, where he would be reinstated in the rank which he
+held before the duel.
+
+I had my horses put into my carriage, and hastened to carry this good
+news to M. de Chavigni.  I was wild with joy, and I did not conceal
+it from the ambassador, who congratulated me, since M.---- having
+obtained by me, without the expenditure of a penny, a favour which
+would have cost him dear if he had succeeded in purchasing it, would
+henceforth be only too happy to treat me with the utmost confidence.
+
+To make the matter still more important, I begged my noble friend to
+announce the pardon to M.---- in person, and he immediately wrote a
+note to that gentleman requesting his presence.
+
+As soon as he made his appearance, the ambassador handed him the copy
+of the pardon, telling him that he owed it all to me.  The worthy man
+was in an ecstasy, and asked what he owed me.
+
+"Nothing, sir, unless you will give me your friendship, which I value
+more than all the gold in the world; and if you would give me a proof
+of your friendship, come and spend a few days with me; I am
+positively dying of loneliness.  The matter I have done for you is a
+mere trifle; you see how quickly it has been arranged."
+
+"A mere trifle!  I have devoted a year's labour to it; I have moved
+heaven and earth without succeeding, and in a fortnight you have
+accomplished it.  Sir, you may dispose of my life."
+
+"Embrace me, and come and see me.  I am the happiest of men when I am
+enabled to serve persons of your merit."
+
+"I will go and tell the good news to my wife, who will love you as
+well as I do."
+
+"Yes, do so," said the ambassador, "and bring her to dinner here to-
+morrow."
+
+When we were alone together, the Marquis de Chavigni, an old courtier
+and a wit, began to make some very philosophical reflections on the,
+state of a court where nothing can be said to be easy or difficult
+per se, as the one at a moment's notice may become the other; a court
+where justice often pleads in vain, while interest or even
+importunity get a ready hearing.  He had known Madame d'Urfe, had
+even paid his court to her at the period when she was secretly
+beloved by the regent.  He it was who had given her the name of
+Egeria, because she said she had a genius who directed her and passed
+the nights with her when she slept by herself.  The ambassador then
+spoke of M.----, who had undoubtedly become a very great friend of
+mine.
+
+"The only way to blind a jealous husband," said he, "is to make him
+your friend, for friendship will rarely admit jealousy."
+
+The next day at dinner, at the ambassador's, Madame gave me a
+thousand proofs of grateful friendship, which my heart interpreted as
+pledges of love.  The husband and wife promised to pay me a three
+days' visit in the following week at my country house.
+
+They kept their word without giving me any further warning, but I was
+not taken by surprise as I had made all preparations for their
+reception.
+
+My heart leapt with joy on seeing my charmer getting down from the
+carriage, but my joy was not unalloyed, as the husband told me that
+they must absolutely return on the fourth day, and the wife insisted
+on the horrible widow being present at all our conversation.
+
+I took my guests to the suite of rooms I had prepared for them, and
+which I judged most suitable for my designs.  It was on the ground
+floor, opposite to my room.  The bedroom had a recess with two beds,
+separated by a partition through which one passed by a door.  I had
+the key to all the doors, and the maid would sleep in a closet beyond
+the ante-chamber.
+
+In obedience to my divinity's commands we went and called on the
+widow, who gave us a cordial welcome; but under the pretext of
+leaving us in freedom refused to be of our company during the three
+days.  However, she gave in when I told her that our agreement was
+only in force when I was alone.
+
+My dear Dubois, with her knowledge of the rules of society, did not
+need a hint to have her supper in her room, and we had an exquisite
+meal as I had given orders that the fare should be of the best.
+After supper I took my guests to their apartment, and felt obliged to
+do the same by the widow.  She wanted me to assist at her toilet, but
+I excused myself with a bow.  She said, maliciously, that after all
+the pains I had taken I deserved to be successful.  I gave her no
+answer.
+
+Next morning, as we were walking in the garden, I warned my charmer
+that I had all the keys of the house, and that I could introduce
+myself into her room at any moment.
+
+"I am waiting," said she, "for my husband's embraces, which he has
+prefaced with caresses, as is usual with him.  We must therefore wait
+till the night after next, which will take away all risk, as I have
+never known him to embrace me for two nights in succession."
+
+About noon we had a visit from M. de Chavigni, who came to ask for
+dinner, and made a great to-do when he heard that my housekeeper
+dined in her room.  The ladies said he was quite right, so we all
+went and made her sit down at table with us.  She must have been
+flattered, and the incident evidently increased her good humour, as
+she amused us by her wit and her piquant stories about Lady Montagu.
+When we had risen from table Madame said to me,--
+
+"You really must be in love with that young woman; she is ravishing."
+
+"If I could pass two hours in your company to-night, I would prove to
+you that I am yours alone."
+
+"It is still out of the question, as my husband has ascertained that
+the moon changes to-day."
+
+"He has to ask leave of the moon, has he, before discharging so sweet
+a duty?"
+
+"Exactly.  According to his system of astrology, it is the only way
+to keep his health and to have the son that Heaven wills to grant
+him, and indeed without aid from above it is hardly likely that his
+wishes will be accomplished."
+
+"I hope to be the instrument of Heaven," said I, laughing.
+
+"I only hope you may."
+
+Thus I was obliged to wait.  Next morning, as we were walking in the
+garden, she said to me,--
+
+"The sacrifice to the moon has been performed, and to make sure I
+will cause him to renew his caresses tonight as soon as we go to bed;
+and after that he is certain to sleep soundly.  You can come at an
+hour after midnight; love will await you."
+
+Certain of my bliss, I gave myself up to the joy that such a
+certainty kindles in a fiery heart.  It was the only night remaining,
+as M.---- had decided that on the next day they would return to
+Soleure.
+
+After supper I took the ladies to their apartments, and on returning
+told my housekeeper that I had a good deal of writing to do, and that
+she should go to bed.
+
+Just before one o'clock I left my room, and the night being a dark
+one I had to feel my way half round my house, and to my surprise
+found the door open; but I did not pay any attention to this
+circumstance.  I opened the door of the second ante-chamber, and the
+moment I shut it again a hand seized mine, whilst another closed my
+lips.  I only heard a whispered "hush!" which bade me silent.  A sofa
+was at hand; we made it our altar of sacrifice, and in a moment I was
+within the temple of love.  It was summer time and I had only two
+hours before me, so I did not lose a moment, and thinking I held
+between my arms the woman I had so long sighed for I renewed again
+and again the pledges of my ardent love.  In the fulness of my bliss
+I thought her not awaiting me in her bed an admirable idea, as the
+noise of our kisses and the liveliness of our motions might have
+awakened the troublesome husband.  Her tender ecstasies equalled
+mine, and increased my bliss by making me believe (oh, fatal error!)
+that of all my conquests this was the one of which I had most reason
+to boast.
+
+To my great grief the clock warned me that it was time for me to be
+gone.  I covered her with the tenderest kisses, and returning to my
+room, in the greatest gladness, I resigned myself to sleep.
+
+I was roused at nine o'clock by M.----, who seemed in a happy frame
+of mind, and shewed me a letter he had just received, in which his
+relative thanked me for restoring him to his regiment.  In this
+letter, which was dictated by gratitude, he spoke of me as if I had
+been a divinity.
+
+"I am delighted," I said, "to have been of service to you."
+
+"And I," said he, "am equally pleased to assure you of my gratitude.
+Come and breakfast with us, my wife is still at her toilette.  Come
+along."
+
+I rose hastily, and just as I was leaving the room I saw the dreadful
+widow, who seemed full of glee, and said,--
+
+"I thank you, sir; I thank you with all my heart.  I beg to leave you
+at liberty again; I am going back to Soleure."
+
+"Wait for a quarter of an hour, we are going to breakfast with
+Madame."
+
+"I can't stop a moment, I have just wished her good day, and now I
+must be gone.  Farewell, and remember me."
+
+"Farewell, madam."
+
+She had hardly gone before M.---- asked me if the woman was beside
+herself.
+
+"One might think so, certainly," I replied, "for she has received
+nothing but politeness at my hands, and I think she might have waited
+to go back with you in the evening."
+
+We went to breakfast and to discuss this abrupt leave-taking, and
+afterwards we took a turn in the garden where we found Madame Dubois.
+M.----  took possession of her; and as I thought his wife looking
+rather downcast I asked her if she had not slept well.
+
+"I did not go to sleep till four o'clock this morning," she replied,
+"after vainly sitting up in bed waiting for you till that time.  What
+unforeseen accident prevented your coming?"
+
+I could not answer her question.  I was petrified.  I looked at her
+fixedly without replying; I could not shake off my astonishment.  At
+last a dreadful suspicion came into my head that I had held within my
+arms for two hours the horrible monster whom I had foolishly received
+in my house.  I was seized with a terrible tremor, which obliged me
+to go and take shelter behind the arbour and hide my emotion.  I felt
+as though I should swoon away.  I should certainly have fallen if I
+had not rested my head against a tree.
+
+My first idea had been a fearful thought, which I hastened to repel,
+that Madame, having enjoyed me, wished to deny all knowledge of the
+fact--a device which is in the power of any woman who gives up her
+person in the dark to adopt, as it is impossible to convict her of
+lying.  However, I knew the divine creature I had thought I possessed
+too well to believe her capable of such base deceit.  I felt that she
+would have been lacking in delicacy, if she had said she had waited
+for me in vain by way of a jest; as in such a case as this the least
+doubt is a degradation.  I was forced, then, to the conclusion that
+she had been supplanted by the infernal widow.  How had she managed
+it?   How had she ascertained our arrangements?   I could not
+imagine, and I bewildered myself with painful surmises.  Reason only
+comes to the aid of the mind when the confusion produced by painful
+thoughts has almost vanished.  I concluded, then, that I had spent
+two hours with this abominable monster; and what increased my
+anguish, and made me loathe and despise myself still more, was that I
+could not help confessing that I had been perfectly happy.  It was an
+unpardonable mistake, as the two women differed as much as white does
+from black, and though the darkness forbade my seeing, and the
+silence my hearing, my sense of touch should have enlightened me--
+after the first set-to, at all events, but my imagination was in a
+state of ecstasy.  I cursed love, my nature, and above all the
+inconceivable weakness which had allowed me to receive into my house
+the serpent that had deprived me of an angel, and made me hate myself
+at the thought of having defiled myself with her.  I resolved to die,
+after having torn to pieces with my own hands the monster who had
+made me so unhappy.
+
+While I was strengthening myself in this resolution M.---- came up to
+me and asked me kindly if I were ill; he was alarmed to see me pale
+and covered with drops of sweat.  "My wife," said the worthy man,
+"is uneasy about you, and sent me to look after you."  I told him I
+had to leave her on account of a sudden dizziness, but that I began
+to feel better.  "Let us rejoin her."  Madame Dubois brought me a
+flask of strong waters, saying pleasantly that she was sure it was
+only the sudden departure of the widow that had put me out.
+
+We continued our walk, and when we were far enough from the husband,
+who was with my housekeeper, I said I had been overcome by what she
+had said, but that it had doubtless been spoken jestingly.
+
+"I was not jesting at all," said she, with a sigh, "tell me what
+prevented your coming."
+
+Again I was struck dumb.  I could not make up my mind to tell her the
+story, and I did not know what to say to justify myself.  I was
+silent and confused when my housekeeper's little servant came up and
+gave me a letter which the wretched widow had sent her by an express.
+She had opened it, and found an enclosure addressed to me inside.  I
+put it in my pocket, saying I would read it at my leisure.  On Madame
+saying in joke that it was a love-letter, I could not laugh, and made
+no answer.  The servant came to tell us that dinner was served, but I
+could touch nothing.  My abstinence was put down to my being unwell.
+
+I longed to read the letter, but I wished to be alone to do so, and
+that was a difficult matter to contrive.
+
+Wishing to avoid the game of piquet which formed our usual
+afternoon's amusement, I took a cup of coffee, and said that I
+thought the fresh air would do me good.  Madame seconded me, and
+guessing what I wanted she asked me to walk up and down with her in a
+sheltered alley in the garden.  I offered her my arm, her husband
+offered his to my housekeeper, and we went out.
+
+As soon as my mistress saw that we were free from observation, she
+spoke as follows,--
+
+"I am sure that you spent the night with that malicious woman, and I
+am afraid of being compromised in consequence.  Tell me everything;
+confide in me without reserve; 'tis my first intrigue, and if it is
+to serve as a lesson you should conceal nothing from me.  I am sure
+you loved me once, tell me that you have not become my enemy."
+
+"Good heavens! what are you saying?  I your enemy!"
+
+"Then tell me all, and before you read that wretched creature's
+letter.  I adjure you in the name of love to hide nothing from me."
+
+"Well, divine creature, I will do as you bid me.  I came to your
+apartment at one o'clock, and as soon as I was in the second ante-
+chamber, I was taken by the arm, and a hand was placed upon my lips
+to impose silence; I thought I held you in my arms, and I laid you
+gently on the sofa.  You must remember that I felt absolutely certain
+it was you; indeed, I can scarcely doubt it even now.  I then passed
+with you, without a word being spoken, two of the most delicious
+hours I have ever experienced.  Cursed hours!  of which the
+remembrance will torment me for the remainder of my days.  I left you
+at a quarter past three.  The rest is known to you."
+
+"Who can have told the monster that you were going to visit me at
+that hour?"
+
+"I can't make out, and that perplexes me."
+
+"You must confess that I am the most to be pitied of us three, and
+perhaps, alas!  the only one who may have a just title to the name
+'wretched.'"
+
+"If you love me, in the name of Heaven do not say that; I have
+resolved to stab her, and to kill myself after having inflicted on
+her that punishment she so well deserves."
+
+"Have you considered that the publicity of such an action would
+render me the most unfortunate of women?   Let us be more moderate,
+sweetheart; you are not to blame for what has happened, and if
+possible I love you all the more.  Give me the letter she has written
+to you.  I will go away from you to read it, and you can read it
+afterwards, as if we were seen reading it together we should have to
+explain matters."
+
+"Here it is."
+
+I then rejoined her husband, whom my housekeeper was sending into
+fits of laughter.  The conversation I had just had had calmed me a
+little, and the trustful way in which she had asked for the letter
+had done me good.  I was in a fever to know the contents, and yet I
+dreaded to read it, as it could only increase my rage and I was
+afraid of the results.
+
+Madame rejoined us, and after we had separated again she gave me the
+letter, telling me to keep it till I was alone.  She asked me to give
+her my word of honour to do nothing without consulting her, and to
+communicate all my designs to her by means of her nurse.
+
+"We need not fear the harpy saying anything about it," she remarked,
+"as she would first have to proclaim her own prostitution, and as for
+us, concealment is the best plan.  And I would have you note that the
+horrible creature gives you a piece of advice you would do well to
+follow."
+
+What completely tore my heart asunder during this interview was to
+see great tears--tears of love and grief--falling from her beautiful
+eyes; though to moderate my anguish she forced a smile.  I knew too
+well the importance she attached to her fair fame not to guess that
+she was tormented with the idea that the terrible widow knew of the
+understanding between us, and the thought added fresh poignancy to my
+sorrow.
+
+This amiable pair left me at seven in the evening, and I thanked the
+husband in such a manner that he could not doubt my sincerity, and,
+in truth, I said no more than I felt.  There is no reason why the
+love one feels for a woman should hinder one from being the true
+friend of her husband--if she have a husband.  The contrary view is a
+hateful prejudice, repugnant both to nature and to philosophy.  After
+I had embraced him I was about to kiss the hand of his charming wife,
+but he begged me to embrace her too, which I did respectfully but
+feelingly.
+
+I was impatient to read the terrible letter, and as soon as they were
+gone I shut myself up in my room to prevent any interruptions.  The
+epistle was as follows:
+
+"I leave your house, sir, well enough pleased, not that I have spent
+a couple of hours with you, for you are no better than any other man,
+but that I have revenged myself on the many open marks of contempt
+you have given me; for your private scorn I care little, and I
+willingly forgive you.  I have avenged myself by unmasking your
+designs and the hypocrisy of your pretty prude, who will no longer be
+able to treat me with that irritating air of superiority which she,
+affecting a virtue which she does not possess, has displayed towards
+me.  I have avenged myself in the fact that she must have been
+waiting for you all the night, and I would have given worlds to have
+heard the amusing conversation you must have had when she found out
+that I had taken for vengeance's sake, and not for love, the
+enjoyment which was meant for her.  I have avenged myself because you
+can no longer pretend to think her a marvel of beauty, as having
+mistaken me for her, the difference between us must needs be slight;
+but I have done you a service, too, as the thought of what has
+happened should cure you of your passion.  You will no longer adore
+her before all other women who are just as good as she.  Thus I have
+disabused you, and you ought to feel grateful to me; but I dispense
+you from all gratitude, and do not care if you choose to hate me,
+provided your hatred leaves me in peace; but if I find your conduct
+objectionable in the future, I warn you that I will tell all, since I
+do not care for my own fame as I am a widow and mistress of my own
+actions.  I need no man's favour, and care not what men may say of
+me.  Your mistress, on the other hand, is in quite a different
+position.
+
+"And here I will give you a piece of advice, which should convince
+you of my generosity.  For the last ten years I have been troubled
+with a little ailment which has resisted all attempts at treatment.
+You exerted yourself to such an extent to prove how well you loved me
+that you must have caught the complaint.  I advise you, then, to put
+yourself under treatment at once to weaken the force of the virus;
+but above all do not communicate it to your mistress, who might
+chance to hand it on to her husband and possibly to others, which
+would make a wretched woman of her, to my grief and sorrow, since she
+has never done me any harm.  I felt certain that you two would
+deceive the worthy husband, and I wished to have proof; thus I made
+you take me in, and the position of the apartment you gave them was
+enough to remove all doubts; still I wanted to have proof positive.
+I had no need of any help to arrive at my ends, and I found it a
+pleasant joke to keep you in the dark.  After passing two nights on
+the sofa all for nothing, I resolved on passing the third night
+there, and my perseverance was crowned with success.  No one saw me,
+and my maid even is ignorant of my nocturnal wanderings, though in
+any case she is accustomed to observe silence.  You are, then, at
+perfect liberty to bury the story in oblivion, and I advise you to do
+so.
+
+"If you want a doctor, tell him to keep his counsel, for people at
+Soleure know of my little indisposition, and they might say you
+caught it from me, and this would do us both harm."
+
+Her impudence struck me so gigantic in its dimensions that I almost
+laughed.  I was perfectly aware that after the way I had treated her
+she must hate me, but I should not have thought she would have
+carried her perverse hatred so far.  She had communicated to me an
+infectious disease, though I did not so far feel any symptoms;
+however, they would no doubt appear, and I sadly thought I should
+have to go away to be cured, to avoid the gossip of malicious wits.
+I gave myself up to reflection, and after two hours' thought I wisely
+resolved to hold my tongue, but to be revenged when the opportunity
+presented itself.
+
+I had eaten nothing at dinner, and needed a good supper to make me
+sleep.  I sat down to table with my housekeeper, but, like a man
+ashamed of himself, I dared not look her in the face.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVI
+
+Continuation of the Preceding Chapter--I Leave Soleure
+
+
+When the servants had gone away and left us alone, it would have
+looked strange if we had remained as dumb as two posts; but in my
+state of mind I did not feel myself capable of breaking the silence.
+My dear Dubois, who began to love me because I made her happy, felt
+my melancholy react on herself, and tried to make me talk.
+
+"Your sadness," said she, "is not like you; it frightens me.  You may
+console yourself by telling me of your troubles, but do not imagine
+that my curiosity springs from any unworthy motive, I only want to be
+of service to you.  You may rely on my being perfectly discreet; and
+to encourage you to speak freely, and to give you that trust in me
+which I think I deserve, I will tell you what I know and what I have
+learnt about yourself.  My knowledge has not been obtained by any
+unworthy stratagems, or by a curiosity in affairs which do not
+concern me."
+
+"I am pleased with what you say, my dear housekeeper.  I see you are
+my friend, and I am grateful to you.  Tell me all you know about the
+matter which is now troubling me, and conceal nothing."
+
+"Very good.  You are the lover and the beloved of Madame----.  The
+widow whom you have treated badly has played you some trick which has
+involved you with your mistress, and then the wretched woman has 477
+left your house with the most unpardonable rudeness this tortures
+you.  You fear some disastrous consequences from which you cannot
+escape, your heart and mind are at war, and there is a struggle in
+your breast between passion and sentiment.  Perhaps I am wrong, but
+yesterday you seemed to me happy and to-day miserable.  I pity you,
+because you have inspired me with the tenderest feelings of
+friendship.  I did my best to-day to converse with the husband that
+you might be free to talk to the wife, who seems to me well worthy of
+your love."
+
+"All that you have said is true.  Your friendship is dear to me, and
+I have a high opinion of your intellectual powers.  The widow is a
+monster who has made me wretched in return for my contempt, and I
+cannot revenge myself on her.  Honour will not allow me to tell you
+any more, and indeed it would be impossible for you or any one else
+to alleviate the grief that overwhelms me.  It may possibly be my
+death, but in the mean time, my dear Dubois, I entreat you to
+continue your friendship towards me, and to treat me with entire
+candour.  I shall always attend to what you say, and thus you will be
+of the greatest service to me.  I shall not be ungrateful."
+
+I spent a weary night as I had expected, for anger, the mother of
+vengeance, always made me sleepless, while sudden happiness had
+sometimes the same effect.
+
+I rang for Le Duc early in the morning, but, instead of him, Madame
+Dubois's ugly little attendant came, and told me that my man was ill,
+and that the housekeeper would bring me my chocolate.  She came in
+directly after, and I had no sooner swallowed the chocolate than I
+was seized with a violent attack of sickness, the effect of anger,
+which at its height may kill the man who cannot satisfy it.  My
+concentrated rage called for vengeance on the dreadful widow, the
+chocolate came on the top of the anger, and if it had not been
+rejected I should have been killed; as it was I was quite exhausted.
+Looking at my housekeeper I saw she was in tears, and asked her why
+she wept.
+
+"Good heavens!  Do you think I have a heart of stone?"
+
+"Calm yourself; I see you pity me.  Leave me, and I hope I shall be
+able to get some sleep."
+
+I went to sleep soon after, and I did not wake till I had slept for
+seven hours.  I felt restored to life.  I rang the bell, my
+housekeeper came in, and told me the surgeon of the place had called.
+She looked very melancholy, but on seeing my more cheerful aspect I
+saw gladness reappearing on her pretty face.
+
+"We will dine together, dearest," said I, "but tell the surgeon to
+come in.  I want to know what he has to say to me."
+
+The worthy man entered, and after looking carefully round the room to
+see that we were alone, he came up to me, and whispered in my ear
+that Le Duc had a malady of a shameful character.
+
+I burst out laughing, as I had been expecting some terrible news.
+
+"My dear doctor," said I, "do all you can to cure him, and I will pay
+you handsomely, but next time don't look so doleful when you have
+anything to tell me.  How old are you?"
+
+"Nearly eighty."
+
+"May God help you!"
+
+I was all the more ready to sympathize with my poor Spaniard, as I
+expected to find myself in a like case.
+
+What a fellow-feeling there is between the unfortunate!  The poor man
+will seek in vain for true compassion at the rich man's doors; what
+he receives is a sacrifice to ostentation and not true benevolence;
+and the man in sorrow should not look for pity from one to whom
+sorrow is unknown, if there be such a person on the earth.
+
+My housekeeper came in to dress me, and asked me what had been the
+doctor's business.
+
+"He must have said something amusing to make you laugh."
+
+"Yes, and I should like to tell you what it was; but before I do so I
+must ask you if you know what the venereal disease is?"
+
+"Yes, I do; Lady Montagu's footman died of it while I was with her"
+
+"Very good, but you should pretend not to know what it is, and
+imitate other ladies who assume an ignorance which well becomes them.
+Poor Le Duc has got this disease."
+
+"Poor fellow, I am sorry for him!  Were you laughing at that?"
+
+"No; it was the air of mystery assumed by the old doctor which amused
+me."
+
+"I too have a confidence to make, and when you have heard it you must
+either forgive me or send me away directly."
+
+"Here is another bother.  What the devil can you have done?   Quick!
+tell me."
+
+"Sir, I have robbed you!"
+
+"What robbed me?   When?   How?   Can you return me what you have
+taken?   I should not have thought you capable of such a thing.  I
+never forgive a robber or a liar."
+
+"You are too hasty, sir.  I am sure you will forgive me, as I robbed
+you only half an hour ago, and I am now going to return to you the
+theft."
+
+"You are a singular woman, my dear.  Come, I will vouchsafe full
+forgiveness, but restore immediately what you have taken."
+
+"This is what I stole."
+
+"What! that monster's letter?   Did you read it?"
+
+"Yes, of course, for otherwise I should not have committed a theft,
+should I?"
+
+"You have robbed me my secret, then, and that is a thing you cannot
+give me back.  You have done very wrong."
+
+"I confess I have.  My theft is all the greater in that I cannot make
+restoration.  Nevertheless, I promise never to speak a word of it all
+my life, and that ought to gain me my pardon.  Give it me quickly."
+
+"You are a little witch.  I forgive you, and here is the pledge of my
+mercy."  So saying I fastened my lips on hers.
+
+"I don't doubt the validity of your pardon; you have signed with a
+double and a triple seal."
+
+"Yes; but for the future do not read, or so much as touch, any of my
+papers, as I am the depositary of secrets of which I am not free to
+dispose."
+
+"Very good; but what shall I do when I find papers on the ground, as
+that letter was?"
+
+"You must pick them up, but not read them."
+
+"I promise to do so."
+
+"Very well, my dear; but you must forget the horrors you have read."
+
+"Listen to me.  Allow me to remember what I have read; perhaps you
+may be the gainer.  Let us talk over this affair, which has made my
+hair stand on end.  This monster of immodesty has given you two
+mortal blows--one in the body and one in the soul; but that is not
+the worst, as she thinks that Madame's honour is in her keeping.
+This, in my thinking, is the worst of all; for, in spite of the
+affront, your mutual love might continue, and the disease which the
+infamous creature has communicated to you would pass off; but if the
+malicious woman carries out her threats, the honour of your charming
+mistress is gone beyond return.  Do not try to make me forget the
+matter, then, but let us talk it over and see what can be done."
+
+I thought I was dreaming when I heard a young woman in her position
+reasoning with more acuteness than Minerva displays in her colloquies
+with Telemachus.  She had captured not only my esteem but my respect.
+
+"Yes, my dear," I answered, "let us think over some plan for
+delivering a woman who deserves the respect of all good men from this
+imminent danger; and the very thought that we have some chance of
+success makes me indebted to you.  Let us think of it and talk of it
+from noon to night.  Think kindly of Madame ----, pardon her first
+slip, protect her honour, and have pity on my distress.  From
+henceforth call me no more your master but your friend.  I will be
+your friend till death; I swear it to you.  What you say is full of
+wisdom; my heart is yours.  Embrace me."
+
+"No, no, that is not necessary; we are young people, and we might
+perhaps allow ourselves to go astray.  I only wish for your
+friendship; but I do not want you to give it to me for nothing.  I
+wish to deserve it by giving you solid proofs of my friendship for
+you.  In the meanwhile I will tell them to serve dinner, and I hope
+that after you have eaten something you will be quite well."
+
+I was astonished at her sagacity.  It might all be calculated
+artifice, and her aim might be to seduce me, but I did not trouble
+myself about that.  I found myself almost in love with her, and like
+to be the dupe of her principles, which would have made themselves
+felt, even if she had openly shared my love.  I decided that I would
+add no fuel to my flames, and felt certain that they would go out of
+their own accord.  By leaving my love thus desolate it would die of
+exhaustion.  I argued like a fool.  I forgot that it is not possible
+to stop at friendship with a pretty woman whom one sees constantly,
+and especially when one suspects her of being in love herself.  At
+its height friendship becomes love, and the palliative one is forced
+to apply to soothe it for a moment only increases its intensity.
+Such was the experience of Anacreon with Smerdis, and Cleobulus with
+Badyllus.  A Platonist who pretends that one is able to live with a
+young woman of whom one is fond, without becoming more than her
+friend, is a visionary who knows not what he says.  My housekeeper
+was too young, too pretty, and above all too pleasant, she had too
+keen a wit, for me not to be captivated by all these qualities
+conjoined; I was bound to become her lover.
+
+We dined quietly together without saying anything about the affair we
+had at heart, for nothing is more imprudent or more dangerous than to
+speak in the presence of servants, who out of maliciousness or
+ignorance put the worst construction on what they hear; add or
+diminish, and think themselves privileged to divulge their master's
+secrets, especially as they know them without having been entrusted
+with them.
+
+As soon as we were alone, my dear Dubois asked me if I had sufficient
+proof of Le Duc's fidelity.
+
+"Well, my dear, he is a rascal and a profligate, full of impudence,
+sharp-witted, ignorant, a fearful liar, and nobody but myself has any
+power over him.  However, he has one good quality, and that is blind
+obedience to my orders.  He defies the stick, and he would defy the
+gallows if it were far enough off.  When I have to ford a river on my
+travels, he strips off his clothes without my telling him, and jumps
+in to see if I can across in safety."
+
+"That will do; he is just what we want under the circumstances.  I
+will begin by assuring you, my dear friend, as you will have me style
+you thus, that Madame's honour is perfectly safe.  Follow my advice,
+and if the detestable widow does not take care she will be the only
+person put to shame.  But we want Le Duc; without him we can do
+nothing.  Above all we must find out how he contracted his disease,
+as several circumstances might throw obstacles in the way of my
+design.  Go to him at once and find out all particulars, and if he
+has told any of the servants what is the matter with him.  When you
+have heard what he has to say, warn him to keep the matter quiet."
+
+I made no objection, and without endeavouring to penetrate her design
+I went to Le Duc.  I found him lying on his bed by himself.  I sat
+down beside him with a smile on my face, and promised to have him
+cured if he would tell me all the circumstances of the case.
+
+"With all my heart, sir, the matter happened like this.  The day you
+sent me to Soleure to get your letters, I got down at a roadside
+dairy to get a glass of milk.  It was served to me by a young wench
+who caught my fancy, and I gave her a hug; she raised no objection,
+and in a quarter of an hour she made me what you see."
+
+"Have you told anyone about it?"
+
+"I took good care not to do so, as I should only have got laughed at.
+The doctor is the only one who knows what is the matter, and he tells
+me the swelling will be gone down before tomorrow, and I hope I shall
+be able by that time to wait upon you."
+
+"Very good, but remember to keep your own counsel."
+
+I proceeded to inform my Minerva of our conversation, and she said,--
+
+"Tell me whether the widow could take her oath that she had spent the
+two hours on the sofa with you."
+
+"No, for she didn't see me, and I did not say a word."
+
+"Very good; then sit down at your desk and write, and tell her she is
+a liar, as you did not leave your room at all, and that you are
+making the necessary enquiries in your household to find out who is
+the wretched person she has unwittingly contaminated.  Write at once
+and send off your letter directly.  In an hour and a half's time you
+can write another letter; or rather you can copy what I am just going
+to put down."
+
+"My dear, I see your plan; it is an ingenious one, but I have given
+my word of honour to Madame to take no steps in the matter without
+first consulting her."
+
+"Then your word of honour must give way to the necessity of saving
+her honour.  Your love retards your steps, but everything depends on
+our promptitude, and on the interval between the first and second
+letter.  Follow my advice, I beg of you, and you will know the rest
+from the letter I am going to write for you to copy.  Quick I write
+letter number one."
+
+I did not allow myself to reflect.  I was persuaded that no better
+plan could be found than that of my charming governess, and I
+proceeded to write the following love-letter to the impudent monster:
+
+"The impudence of your letter is in perfect accord with the three
+nights you spent in discovering a fact which has no existence save in
+your own perverse imagination.  Know, cursed woman, that I never left
+my room, and that I have not to deplore the shame of having passed
+two hours with a being such as you.  God knows with whom you did pass
+them, but I mean to find out if the whole story is not the creation
+of your devilish brain, and when I do so I will inform you.
+
+"You may thank Heaven that I did not open your letter till after M.
+and Madame had gone.  I received it in their presence, but despising
+the hand that wrote it I put it in my pocket, little caring what
+infamous stuff it contained.  If I had been curious enough to read it
+and my guests had seen it, I would have you know that I would have
+gone in pursuit of you, and at this moment you would have been a
+corpse.  I am quite well, and have no symptoms of any complaint, but
+I shall not lower myself to convince you of my health, as your eyes
+would carry contagion as well as your wretched carcase."
+
+I shewed the letter to my dear Dubois, who thought it rather strongly
+expressed, but approved of it on the whole; I then sent it to the
+horrible being who had caused me such unhappiness.  An hour and a
+half afterwards I sent her the following letter, which I copied
+without addition or subtraction:
+
+"A quarter of an hour after I had sent off my letter, the village
+doctor came to tell me that my man had need of his treatment for a
+disease of a shameful nature which he had contracted quite recently.
+I told him to take care of his patient; and when he had gone I went
+to see the invalid, who confessed, after some pressure, that he had
+received this pretty present from you.  I asked him how he had
+contrived to obtain access to you, and he said that he saw you going
+by your self in the dark into the apartment of M.----.  Knowing that
+I had gone to bed, and having no further services to render me,
+curiosity made him go and see what you were doing there by stealth,
+as if you had wanted to see the lady, who would be in bed by that
+time, you would not have gone by the door leading to the garden.  He
+at first thought that you went there with ill-intent, and he waited
+an hour to see if you stole anything, in which case he would have
+arrested you; but as you did not come out, and he heard no noise, he
+resolved to go in after you, and found you had left the door open.
+He has assured me that he had no intentions in the way of carnal
+enjoyment, and I can well believe him.  He tells me he was on the
+point of crying for help, when you took hold of him and put your hand
+over his mouth; but he changed his plans on finding himself drawn
+gently to a couch and covered with kisses.  You plainly took him for
+somebody else, 'and,' said he, 'I did her a service which she has
+done ill to recompense in this fashion.'  He left you without saying
+a word as soon as the day began to dawn, his motive being fear of
+recognition.  It is easy to see that you took my servant for myself,
+for in the night, you know, all cats are grey, and I congratulate you
+on obtaining an enjoyment you certainly would not have had from me,
+as I should most surely have recognized you directly from your breath
+and your aged charms, and I can tell you it would have gone hard with
+you.  Luckily for you and for me, things happened otherwise.  I may
+tell you that the poor fellow is furious, and intends making you a
+visit, from which course I believe I have no right to dissuade him.
+I advise you to hear him politely, and to be in a generous mood when
+he comes, as he is a determined fellow like all Spaniards, and if you
+do not treat him properly he will publish the matter, and you will
+have to take the consequences.  He will tell you himself what his
+terms are, and I daresay you will be wise enough to grant them."
+
+An hour after I had sent off this epistle I received a reply to my
+first letter.  She told me that my device was an ingenious one, but
+that it was no good, as she knew what she was talking about.  She
+defied me to shew her that I was healthy in the course of a few days.
+
+While we were at supper, my dear Dubois tried her utmost to cheer me
+up, but all to no purpose; I was too much under the influence of
+strong emotion to yield to her high spirits.  We discussed the third
+step, which would put an apex to the scheme and cover the impudent
+woman with shame.  As I had written the two letters according to my
+housekeeper's instructions, I determined to follow her advice to the
+end.  She told me what to say to Le Duc in the morning; and she was
+curious to know what sort of stuff he was made of, she begged me to
+let her listen behind the curtains of my bed.
+
+Next morning Le Due came in, and I asked if he could ride on
+horseback to Soleure.
+
+"Yes, sir," he replied, "but the doctor tells me I must begin to
+bathe to-morrow."
+
+"Very good.  As soon as your horse is ready, set out and go to Madame
+F----, but do not let her know you come from me, or suspect that you
+are a mere emissary of mine.  Say that you want to speak to her.  If
+she refuses to receive you, wait outside in the street; but I fancy
+she will receive you, and without a witness either.  Then say to her,
+'You have given me my complaint without having been asked, and I
+require you to give me sufficient money to get myself cured.' Add
+that she made you work for two hours in the dark, and that if it had
+not been for the fatal present she had given to you, you would have
+said nothing about it; but that finding yourself in such a state (you
+needn't be ashamed to shew her) she ought not to be astonished at
+your taking such a course.  If she resists, threaten her with the
+law.  That's all you have to do, but don't let my name appear.
+Return directly without loss of time, that I may know how you have
+got on."
+
+"That's all very fine, sir, but if this jolly wench has me pitched
+out of window, I shan't come home quite so speedily."
+
+"Quite so, but you needn't be afraid; I will answer for your safety."
+
+"It's a queer business you are sending me on."
+
+"You are the only man I would trust to do it properly."
+
+"I will do it all right, but I want to ask you one or two essential
+questions.  Has the lady really got the what d'you call it?"
+
+"She has."
+
+"I am sorry for her.  But how am I to stick to it that she has
+peppered me, when I have never spoken to her?"
+
+"Do you usually catch that complaint by speaking, booby?"
+
+"No, but one speaks in order to catch it, or while one is catching
+it."
+
+"You spent two hours in the dark with her without a word being
+spoken, and she will see that she gave this fine present to you while
+she thought she was giving it to another."
+
+"Ah! I begin to see my way, sir.  But if we were in the dark, how was
+I to know it was she I had to do with?
+
+"Thus:  you saw her going in by the garden door, and you marked her
+unobserved.  But you may be sure she won't ask you any of these
+questions."
+
+"I know what to do now.  I will start at once, and I am as curious as
+you to know what her answer will be.  But here's another question
+comes into my head.  She may try to strike a bargain over the sum I
+am to ask for my cure; if so, shall I be content with three hundred
+francs?"
+
+"That's too much for her, take half."
+
+"But it isn't much for two hours of such pleasure for her and six
+weeks of such pain for me."
+
+"I will make up the rest to you."
+
+"That's good hearing.  She is going to pay for damage she has done.
+I fancy I see it all, but I shall say nothing.  I would bet it is you
+to whom she has made this fine present, and that you want to pay her
+out."
+
+"Perhaps so; but keep your own counsel and set out."
+
+"Do you know I think the rascal is unique," said my dear Dubois,
+emerging from her hiding-place, "I had hard work to keep from
+laughing when he said that if he were pitched out of the window he
+would not come back so soon.  I am sure he will acquit himself better
+than ever did diplomatist.  When he gets to Soleure the monster will
+have already dispatched her reply to your second letter.  I am
+curious to see how it will turn out."
+
+"To you, my dear, the honour of this comedy belongs.  You have
+conducted this intrigue like a past master in the craft.  It could
+never be taken for the work of a novice."
+
+"Nevertheless, it is my first and I hope it will be my last intrigue"
+
+"I hope she won't defy me to 'give evidence of my health."
+
+"You are quite well so far, I think?"
+
+"Yes; and, by the way, it is possible she may only have leucorrhoea.
+I am longing to see the end of the piece, and to set my mind at
+rest."
+
+"Will you give Madame an account of our scheme?"
+
+"Yes; but I shall not be able to give you the credit you deserve."
+
+"I only want to have credit in your eyes."
+
+"You cannot doubt that I honour you immensely, and I shall certainly
+not deprive you of the reward that is your due."
+
+"The only reward I ask for is for you to be perfectly open with me."
+
+"You are very wonderful.  Why do you interest yourself so much in my
+affairs?   I don't like to think you are really inquisitive."
+
+"You would be wrong to think that I have a defect which would lower
+me in my own eyes.  Be sure, sir, that I shall only be curious when
+you are sad."
+
+"But what can have made you feel so generously towards me?"
+
+"Only your honourable conduct towards me."
+
+"You touch me profoundly, and I promise to confide in you for the
+future."
+
+"You will make me happy."
+
+Le Duc had scarcely gone an hour when a messenger on foot came to
+bring me a second letter from the widow.  He also gave me a small
+packet, telling me that he had orders to wait for a reply.  I sent
+him down to wait, and I gave the letter to Madame Dubois, that she
+might see what it contained.  While she was reading it I leant upon
+the window, my heart beating violently.
+
+"Everything is getting on famously," cried my housekeeper.  "Here is
+the letter; read it."
+
+"Whether I am being told the truth, or whether I am the victim of a
+myth arising from your fertile imagination (for which you are too
+well known all over Europe), I will regard the whole story as being
+true, as I am not in a position to disprove it.  I am deeply grieved
+to have injured an innocent man who has never done me any ill, and I
+will willingly pay the penalty by giving him a sum which will be more
+than sufficient to cure him of the plague with which I infected him.
+I beg that you will give him the twenty-five louis I am sending you;
+they will serve to restore him to health, and to make him forget the
+bitterness of the pleasure I am so sorry to have procured for him.
+And now are you sufficiently generous to employ your authority as
+master to enjoin on your man the most absolute secrecy?   I hope so,
+for you have reason to dread my vengeance otherwise.  Consider that,
+if this affair is allowed to transpire, it will be easy for me to
+give it a turn which may be far from pleasant to you, and which will
+force the worthy man you are deceiving to open his eyes; for I have
+not changed my opinion, as I have too many proofs of your
+understanding with his wife.  As I do not desire that we should meet
+again, I shall go to Lucerne on the pretext of family concerns.  Let
+me know that you have got this letter."
+
+"I am sorry," I said, "to have sent Le Duc, as the harpy is violent,
+and I am afraid of something happening to him."
+
+"Don't be afraid," she replied, "nothing will happen, and it is
+better that they should see each other; it makes it more certain.
+Send her the money directly; she will have to give it to him herself,
+and your vengeance will be complete.  She will not be able to
+entertain the slightest suspicion, especially if Le Duc shews her her
+work, and in two or three hours you will have the pleasure of hearing
+everything from his lips.  You have reason to bless your stars, as
+the honour of the woman you love is safe.  The only thing that can
+trouble you is the remembrance of the widow's foul embraces, and the
+certainty that the prostitute has communicated her complaint to you.
+Nevertheless, I hope it may prove a slight attack and be easily
+cured.  An inveterate leucorrhoea is not exactly a venereal disease,
+and I have heard people in London say that it was rarely contagious.
+We ought to be very thankful that she is going to Lucerne.  Laugh and
+be thankful; there is certainly a comic touch in our drama."
+
+"Unfortunately, it is tragi-comic.  I know the human heart, and I am
+sure that I must have forfeited Madame's affections."
+
+"It is true that----; but this is not the time to be thinking of such
+matters.  Quick!  write to her briefly and return her the twenty-five
+Louis."
+
+My reply was as follows:
+
+"Your unworthy suspicions, your abominable design of revenge, and the
+impudent letter you wrote me, are the only causes of your no doubt
+bitter repentance.  I hope that it will restore peace to your
+conscience.  Our messengers have crossed, through no fault of mine.
+I send you the twenty-five Louis; you can give them to the man
+yourself.  I could not prevent my servant from paying you a visit,
+but this time you will not keep him two hours, and you will not find
+it difficult to appease his anger.  I wish you a good journey, and I
+shall certainly flee all occasions of meeting you, for I always avoid
+the horrible; and you must know, odious woman, that it isn't
+everybody who endeavours to ruin the reputation of their friends.
+If you see the apostolic nuncio at Lucerne, ask him about me, and he
+will tell you what sort of a reputation I have in Europe.  I can
+assure you that Le Duc has only spoken to me of his misadventure, and
+that if you treat him well he will be discreet, as he certainly has
+nothing to boast of.  Farewell."
+
+My dear Minerva approved of this letter, and I sent it with the money
+by the messenger.
+
+"The piece is not yet done," said my housekeeper, "we have three
+scenes more:"
+
+"What are they?"
+
+"The return of your Spaniard, the appearance of the disease, and the
+astonishment of Madame when she hears it all."
+
+I counted the moments for Le Duc to return, but in vain; he did not
+appear.  I was in a state of great anxiety, although my dear Dubois
+kept telling me that the only reason he was away so long was that the
+widow was out.  Some people are so happily constituted that they
+never admit the possibility of misfortune.  I was like that myself
+till the age of thirty, when I was put under the Leads.  Now I am
+getting into my dotage and look on the dark side of everything.  I am
+invited to a wedding, and see nought but gloom; and witnessing the
+coronation of Leopold, at Prague, I say to myself, 'Nolo coronari'.
+Cursed old age, thou art only worthy of dwelling in hell, as others
+before me have thought also, 'tristisque senectus'.
+
+About half-past nine my housekeeper looked out, and saw Le Duc by the
+moonlight coming along at a good pace.  That news revived me.  I had
+no light in the room, and my housekeeper ran to hide in the recess,
+for she would not have missed a word of the Spaniard's communication.
+
+"I am dying of hunger," said he, as he came in.  "I had to wait for
+that woman till half-past six.  When she came in she found me on the
+stairs and told me to go about my business, as she had nothing to say
+to me.
+
+"'That may be, fair lady,' I replied; 'but I have a few words to say
+to you, and I have been waiting here for a cursed time with that
+intent.'
+
+"'Wait a minute,' she replied; and then putting into her pocket a
+packet and a letter which I thought was addressed in your writing,
+she told me to follow her.  As soon as I got to her room, I saw there
+was no one else present, and I told her that she had infected me, and
+that I wanted the wherewithal to pay the doctor.  As she said nothing
+I proceeded to convince her of my infected state, but she turned away
+her head, and said,--
+
+"'Have you been waiting for me long?
+
+"'Since eleven, without having had a bite or a sup.'
+
+"Thereupon she went out, and after asking the servant, whom I suppose
+she had sent here, what time he had come back, she returned to me,
+shut the door, and gave me the packet, telling me that it contained
+twenty-five Louis for my cure, and that if I valued my life I would
+keep silence in the matter.  I promised to be discreet, and with that
+I left here, and here I am.
+
+"Does the packet belong to me?"
+
+"Certainly.  Have some supper and go to bed."
+
+My dear Dubois came out of her recess and embraced me, and we spent a
+happy evening.  Next morning I noticed the first symptoms of the
+disease the hateful widow had communicated to me, but in three or
+four days I found it was of a very harmless character, and a week
+later I was quite rid of it.  My poor Spaniard, on the other hand,
+was in a pitiable case.
+
+I passed the whole of the next morning in writing to Madame.  I told
+her circumstantially all I had done, in spite of my promise to
+consult her, and I sent her copies of all the letters to convince her
+that our enemy had gone to Lucerne with the idea that her vengeance
+had been only an imaginary one.  Thus I shewed her that her honour
+was perfectly safe.  I ended by telling her that I had noticed the
+first symptoms of the disease, but that I was certain of getting rid
+of it in a very few days.  I sent my letter through her nurse, and in
+two days' time I had a few lines from her informing me that I should
+see her in the course of the week in company with her husband and
+M. de Chavigni.
+
+Unhappy I!  I was obliged to renounce all thoughts of love, but my
+Dubois, who was with me nearly all day on account of Le Duc's
+illness, began to stand me in good stead.  The more I determined to
+be only a friend to her, the more I was taken with her; and it was in
+vain that I told myself that from seeing her without any love-making
+my sentiment for her would die a natural death.  I had made her a
+present of a ring, telling her that whenever she wanted to get rid of
+it I would give her a hundred louis for it; but this could only
+happen in time of need--an impossible contingency while she continued
+with me, and I had no idea of sending her away.  She was natural and
+sincere, endowed with a ready wit and good reasoning powers.  She had
+never been in love, and she had only married to please Lady Montagu.
+She only wrote to her mother, and to please her I read the letters.
+They were full of filial piety, and were admirably written.
+
+One day the fancy took me to ask to read the letters her mother wrote
+in reply.  "She never replies," said she, "For an excellent reason,
+namely, that she cannot write.  I thought she was dead when I came
+back from England, and it was a happy surprise to find her in perfect
+health when I got to Lausanne."
+
+"Who came with you from England?"
+
+"Nobody."
+
+"I can't credit that.  Young, beautiful, well dressed, obliged to
+associate casually with all kinds of people, young men and
+profligates (for there are such everywhere), how did you manage to
+defend yourself?"
+
+"Defend myself?  I never needed to do so.  The best plan for a young
+woman is never to stare at any man, to pretend not to hear certain
+questions and certainly not to answer them, to sleep by herself in a
+room where there is a lock and key, or with the landlady when
+possible.  When a girl has travelling adventures, one may safely say
+that she has courted them, for it is easy to be discreet in all
+countries if one wishes."
+
+She spoke justly.  She assured me that she had never had an adventure
+and had never tripped, as she was fortunate enough not to be of an
+amorous disposition.  Her naive stories, her freedom from prudery,
+and her sallies full of wit and good sense, amused me from morning
+till night, and we sometimes thoued each other; this was going rather
+far, and should have shewn us that we were on the brink of the
+precipice.  She talked with much admiration of the charms of Madame,
+and shewed the liveliest interest in my stories of amorous adventure.
+When I got on risky ground, I would make as if I would fain spare her
+all unseemly details, but she begged me so gracefully to hide
+nothing, that I found myself obliged to satisfy her; but when my
+descriptions became so faithful as almost to set us on fire, she
+would burst into a laugh, put her hand over my mouth, and fly like a
+hunted gazelle to her room, and then lock herself in.  One day I
+asked her why she did so, and she answered, "To hinder you from
+coming to ask me for what I could not refuse you at such moments."
+
+The day before that on which M. and Madame and M. de Chavigni came to
+dine with me, she asked me if I had had any amorous adventures in
+Holland.  I told her about Esther, and when I came to the mole and my
+inspection of it, my charming curiosity ran to stop my mouth, her
+sides shaking with laughter.  I held her gently to me, and could not
+help seeking whether she had a mole in the same place, to which she
+opposed but a feeble resistance.  I was prevented by my unfortunate
+condition from immolating the victim on the altar of love, so we
+confined ourselves to a make-believe combat which only lasted a
+minute; however, our eyes took in it, and our excited feelings were
+by no means appeased.  When we had done she said, laughing, but yet
+discreetly,--
+
+"My dear friend, we are in love with one another; and if we do not
+take care we shall not long be content with this trifling."
+
+Sighing as she spoke, she wished me good night and went to bed with
+her ugly little maid.  This was the first time we had allowed
+ourselves to be overcome by the violence of our passion, but the
+first step was taken.  As I retired to rest I felt that I was in
+love, and foresaw that I should soon be under the rule of my charming
+housekeeper.
+
+M. and Madame--and M.  Chavigni gave us an agreeable surprise, the
+next day, by coming to dine with us, and we passed the time till
+dinner by walking in the garden.  My dear Dubois did the honours of
+the table, and I was glad to see that my two male guests were
+delighted with her, for they did not leave her for a moment during
+the afternoon, and I was thus enabled to tell my charmer all I had
+written to her.  Nevertheless I took care not to say a word about the
+share my housekeeper had had in the matter, for my mistress would
+have been mortified at the thought that her weakness was known to
+her.
+
+"I was delighted to read your letters," said she, "and to hear that
+that villainous woman can no longer flatter herself upon having spent
+two hours with you.  But tell me, how can you have actually spent
+them with her without noticing, in spite of the dark, the difference
+between her and me?   She is much shorter, much thinner, and ten
+years older.  Besides, her breath is disagreeable, and I think you
+know that I have not that defect.  Certainly, you could not see her
+hair, but you could touch, and yet you noticed nothing!  I can
+scarcely believe it!"
+
+"Unhappily, it is only too true.  I was inebriated with love, and
+thinking only of you, I saw nothing but you."
+
+"I understand how strong the imagination would be at first, but this
+element should have been much diminished after the first or second
+assault; and, above all, because she differs from me in a matter
+which I cannot conceal and she cannot supply."
+
+"You are right--a burst of Venus!  When I think that I only touched
+two dangling flabby breasts, I feel as if I did not deserve to live!"
+
+"And you felt them, and they did not disgust you!"
+
+"Could I be disgusted, could I even reflect, when I felt certain that
+I held you in my arms, you for whom I would give my life.  No, a
+rough skin, a stinking breath, and a fortification carried with far
+too much ease; nothing could moderate my amorous fury."
+
+"What do I hear?  Accursed and unclean woman, nest of impurities!
+And could you forgive me all these defects?"
+
+"I repeat, the idea that I possessed you deprived me of my thinking
+faculties; all seemed to me divine."
+
+"You should have treated me like a common prostitute, you should even
+have beaten me on finding me such as you describe."
+
+"Ah!  now you are unjust"
+
+"That may be; I am so enraged against that monster that my anger
+deprives me of reason.  But now that she thinks that she had to do
+with a servant, and after the degrading visit she has had she ought
+to die of rage and shame.  What astonishes me is her believing it,
+for he is shorter than you by four inches.  And how can she imagine
+that a servant would do it as well as you?   It's not likely.  I am
+sure she is in love with him now.  Twenty-five louis!  He would have
+been content with ten.  What a good thing that the poor fellow's
+illness happened so conveniently.  But I suppose you had to tell him
+all?"
+
+"Not at all.  I gave him to understand that she had made an
+appointment with me in that room, and that I had really spent two
+hours with her, not speaking for fear of being heard.  Then, thinking
+over the orders I gave him, he came to the conclusion that on finding
+myself diseased afterwards I was disgusted, and being able to disavow
+my presence I had done so for the sake of revenge."
+
+"That's admirable, and the impudence of the Spaniard passes all
+belief.  But her impudence is the most astonishing thing of all.  But
+supposing her illness had been a mere trick to frighten you, what a
+risk the rascal would have run!"
+
+"I was afraid of that, as I had no symptoms of disease whatever."
+
+"But now you really have it, and all through my fault.  I am in
+despair."
+
+"Be calm, my angel, my disease is of a very trifling nature.  I am
+only taking nitre, and in a week I shall be quite well again.  I hope
+that then .  .  .  ."
+
+"Ah! my dear friend."
+
+"What?"
+
+"Don't let us think of that any more, I beseech you."
+
+"You are disgusted, and not unnaturally; but your love cannot be very
+strong, Ah! how unhappy I am."
+
+"I am more unhappy than you.  I love you, and you would be thankless
+indeed if you ceased to love me.  Let us love each other, but let us
+not endeavour to give one another proofs of our love.  It might be
+fatal.  That accursed widow!  She is gone away, and in a fortnight we
+shall be going also to Bale, where we remain till the end of
+November."
+
+The die is cast, and I see that I must submit to your decision, or
+rather to my destiny, for none but fatal events have befallen me
+since I came to Switzerland.  My only consoling thought is that I
+have made your honour safe."
+
+"You have won my husband's friendship and esteem; we shall always be
+good friends."
+
+"If you are going I feel that I must go before you.  That will tend
+to convince the wretched author of my woe that there is nothing
+blame-worthy in my friendship for you."
+
+"You reason like an angel, and you convince me more and more of your
+love.  Where are you going?"
+
+"To Italy; but I shall take Berne and Geneva on my way."
+
+"You will not be coming to Bale, then?  I am glad to hear it, in
+spite of the pleasure it would give me to see you.  No doubt your
+arrival would give a handle for the gossips, and I might suffer by
+it.  But if possible, in the few days you are to remain, shew
+yourself to be in good spirits, for sadness does not become you."
+
+We rejoined the ambassador and M.----  who had not had time to think
+about us, as my dear Dubois had kept them amused by her lively
+conversation.  I reproached her for the way in which she husbanded
+her wit as far as I was concerned, and M. de Chavigni, seizing the
+opportunity, told us it was because we were in love, and lovers are
+known to be chary of their words.  My housekeeper was not long in
+finding a repartee, and she again began to entertain the two
+gentlemen, so that I was enabled to continue my walk with Madame, who
+said,--
+
+"Your housekeeper, my dear friend, is a masterpiece.  Tell me the
+truth, and I promise to give you a mark of my gratitude that will
+please you before I go."
+
+"Speak; what do you wish to know?"
+
+"You love her and she loves you in return."
+
+"I think you are right, but so far .  .  .  ."
+
+"I don't want to know any more, for if matters are not yet arranged
+they soon will be, and so it comes to the same thing.  If you had
+told me you did not love her I should not have believed you, for I
+can't conceive that a man of your age can live with a woman like that
+without loving her.  She is very pretty and exceedingly intelligent,
+she has good spirits, talents, an excellent manner, and she speaks
+exceedingly well: that is enough to charm you, and I expect you will
+find it difficult to separate from her.  Lebel did her a bad turn in
+sending her to you, as she used to have an excellent reputation, and
+now she will no longer be able to get a place with ladies in the
+highest society."
+
+"I shall take her to Berne."
+
+"That is a good idea."
+
+Just as they were going I said that I should soon be coming to
+Soleure to thank them for the distinguished reception they had given
+me, as I proposed leaving in a few days.  The idea of never seeing
+Madame again was so painful to me that as soon as I got in I went to
+bed, and my housekeeper, respecting my melancholy, retired after
+wishing me good-night.
+
+In two or three days I received a note from my charmer, bidding me
+call upon them the day following at about ten o'clock, and telling me
+I was to ask for dinner.  I carried out her orders to the letter.
+M. gave me a most friendly reception, but saying that he was obliged
+to go into the country and could not be home till one o'clock, he
+begged me not to be offended if he delivered me over to his wife for
+the morning.  Such is the fate of a miserable husband!  His wife was
+engaged with a young girl at tambour-work; I accepted her company on
+the condition that she would not allow me to disturb her work.
+
+The girl went away at noon, and soon after we went to enjoy the fresh
+air outside the house.  We sat in a summer-house from which,
+ourselves unseen, we could see all the carriages that approached the
+house.
+
+"Why, dearest, did you not procure me the bliss when I was in good
+health."
+
+"Because at that time my husband suspected that you turned yourself
+into a waiter for my sake, and that you could not be indifferent
+towards me.  Your discretion has destroyed his suspicions; and also
+your housekeeper, whom he believes to be your wife, and who has taken
+his fancy to such an extent, that I believe he would willingly
+consent to an exchange, for a few days at any rate.  Would you
+agree?"
+
+"Ah! if the exchange could be effected."
+
+Having only an hour before me, and foreseeing that it would be the
+last I should pass beside her, I threw myself at her feet.  She was
+full of affection, and put no obstacles in the way of my desires,
+save those which my own feelings dictated, for I loved her too well
+to consent to injure her health.  I did all I could to replace the
+utmost bliss, but the pleasure she enjoyed doubtless consisted in a
+great measure in shewing me her superiority to the horrible widow.
+
+When we saw the husband's carriage coming, we rose and took care that
+the worthy man should not find us in the arbour.  He made a thousand
+excuses for not having returned sooner.
+
+We had an excellent dinner, and at table he talked almost entirely of
+my housekeeper, and he seemed moved when I said I meant to take her
+to Lausanne to her mother.  I took leave of them at five o'clock with
+a broken heart, and from there I went to M. de Chavigni and told him
+all my adventures.  He had a right to be told, as he had done all in
+his power to insure the success of a project which had only failed by
+an unexampled fatality.
+
+In admiration of my dear Dubois's wit--for I did not conceal the part
+she played he said that old as he was he should think himself quite
+happy if he had such a woman with him, and he was much pleased when I
+told him that I was in love with her.  "Don't give yourself the
+trouble, my dear Casanova, of running from house to house to take
+leave," said the amiable nobleman.  "It can be done just as well at
+the assembly, and you need not even stay to supper, if you don't want
+to."
+
+I followed his advice, and thus saw again Madame as I thought, for
+the last time, but I was wrong; I saw her ten years afterwards; and
+at the proper time the reader will see where, when, how, and under
+what circumstances.
+
+Before going away, I followed the ambassador to his room to thank him
+as he deserved, for his kindness, and to ask him to give me a letter
+of introduction for Berne, where I thought of staying a fortnight.
+I also begged him to send Lebel to me that we might settle our
+accounts.  He told me that Lebel should bring me a letter for M. de
+Muralt, the Mayor of Thun.
+
+When I got home, feeling sad on this, the eve of my leaving a town
+where I had but trifling victories and heavy losses, I thanked my
+housekeeper for waiting for me, and to give her a good night I told
+her that in three days we should set out for Berne, and that my mails
+must be packed.
+
+Next day, after a somewhat silent breakfast, she said,--
+
+"You will take me with you, won't you?"
+
+"Certainly, if you like me well enough to want to go."
+
+"I would go with you to the end of the world, all the more as you are
+now sick and sad, and when I saw you first you were blithe and well.
+If I must leave you, I hope at least to see you happy first."
+
+The doctor came in just then to tell me that my poor Spaniard was so
+ill that he could not leave his bed.
+
+"I will have him cured at Berne," said I ; "tell him that we are
+going to dine there the day after to-morrow."
+
+"I must tell you, sir, that though it's only a seven leagues'
+journey, he cannot possibly undertake it as he has lost the use of
+all his limbs."
+
+"I am sorry to hear that, doctor."
+
+"I dare say, but it's true."
+
+"I must verify the matter with my own eyes;" and so saying I went to
+see Le Duc.
+
+I found the poor rascal, as the doctor had said, incapable of motion.
+He had only the use of his tongue and his eyes.
+
+"You are in a pretty state," said I to him.
+
+"I am very ill, sir, though otherwise I feel quite well."
+
+"I expect so, but as it is you can't move, and I want to dine at
+Berne the day after to-morrow."
+
+"Have me carried there, I shall get cured."
+
+"You are right, I will have you carried in a litter."
+
+"I shall look like a saint out for a walk."
+
+I told one of the servants to look after him, and to see to all that
+was necessary for our departure.  I had him taken to the "Falcon" by
+two horses who drew his litter.
+
+Lebel came at noon and gave me the letter his master had written for
+M. de Murat.  He brought his receipts and I paid everything without
+objection, as I found him an entirely honest man, and I had him to
+dinner with Madame Dubois and myself.  I did not feel disposed to
+talk, and I was glad to see that they got on without me; they talked
+away admirably and amused me, for Lebel was by no means wanting in
+wit.  He said he was very glad I had given him an opportunity of
+knowing the housekeeper, as he could not say he had known her before,
+having only seen her two or three times in passing through Lausanne.
+On rising from the table he asked my permission to write to her, and
+she, putting in her voice, called on him not to forget to do so.
+
+Lebel was a good-natured man, of an honest appearance, and
+approaching his fiftieth year.  Just as he was going, without asking
+my leave, he embraced her in the French fashion, and she seemed not
+to have the slightest objection.
+
+She told me as soon as he was gone that this worthy man might be
+useful to her, and that she was delighted to enter into a
+correspondence with him.
+
+The next day was spent in putting everything in order for our short
+journey, and Le Duc went off in his litter, intending to rest for the
+night at four leagues from Soleure.  On the day following, after I
+had remembered the door-keeper, the cook, and the man-servant I was
+leaving behind, I set out in my carriage with the charming Dubois,
+and at eleven o'clock I arrived at the inn at Berne, where Le Duc had
+preceded me by two hours.  In the first place, knowing the habits of
+Swiss innkeepers, I made an agreement with the landlord; and I then
+told the servant I had kept, who came from Berne, to take care of Le
+Duc, to put him under good medical superintendence, and to bid the
+doctor spare nothing to cure him completely.
+
+I dined with my housekeeper in her room, for she had a separate
+lodging, and after sending my letter to M. de Muralt I went out for a
+walk.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVII
+
+Berne--La Mata Madame de la Saone--Sara--My Departure--Arrival at
+Bale
+
+
+I reached an elevation from which I could look over a vast stretch of
+country watered by a little river, and noticing a path leading to a
+kind of stair, the fancy took me to follow it.  I went down about a
+hundred steps, and found forty small closets which I concluded were
+bathing machines.  While I was looking at the place an honest-looking
+fellow came up to me, and asked me if I would like a bath.  I said I
+would, and he opened one of the closets, and before long I surrounded
+by a crowd of young girls.
+
+"Sir," said the man, "they all aspire to the honour of attending you
+while you bathe; you have only to choose which it shall be.  Half-a-
+crown will pay for the bath, the girl, and your coffee."
+
+As if I were the Grand Turk, I examined the swarm of rustic beauties,
+and threw my handkerchief at the one I liked the best.  We went into
+a closet, and shutting the door with the most serious air, without
+even looking at me, she undressed me, and put a cotton cap on my
+head, and as soon as she saw me in the water she undressed herself as
+coolly as possible, and without a word came into the bath.  Then she
+rubbed me all over, except in a certain quarter, which I had covered
+with my hands.  When I thought I had been manipulated sufficiently, I
+asked for coffee.  She got out of the bath, opened the door, and
+after asking for what I wanted got in again without the slightest
+consciousness.
+
+When the coffee came she got out again to take it, shut the door, and
+returned to the bath, and held the tray while I was drinking, and
+when I had finished she remained beside me.
+
+Although I had taken no great notice of her, I could see that she
+possessed all the qualifications a man could desire in a woman: fine
+features, lively eyes, a pretty mouth, and an excellent row of teeth,
+a healthy complexion, a well-rounded bosom a curved back, and all
+else in the same sort.  I certainly thought her hands might have been
+softer, but their hardness was probably due to hard work.
+Furthermore, she was only eighteen, and yet I remained cold to all
+her charms.  How was that?   That was the question I asked myself;
+and I think the reason probably was that she was too natural, too
+devoid of those assumed graces and coquettish airs which women employ
+with so much art for the seduction of men.  We only care for artifice
+and false show.  Perhaps, too, our senses, to be irritated, require
+woman's charms to be veiled by modesty.  But if, accustomed as we are
+to clothe ourselves, the face is the smallest factor in our perfect
+happiness, how is it that the face plays the principal part in
+rendering a man amorous?   Why do we take the face as an index of a
+woman's beauty, and why do we forgive her when the covered parts are
+not in harmony with her features?   Would it not be much more
+reasonable and sensible to veil the face, and to have the rest of the
+body naked?   Thus when we fall in love with a woman, we should only
+want, as the crown of our bliss, to see a face answerable to those
+other charms which had taken our fancy.  There can be no doubt that
+that would be the better plan, as in that case we should only be
+seduced by a perfect beauty, and we should grant an easy pardon if at
+the lifting of the mask we found ugliness instead of loveliness.
+Under those circumstances an ugly woman, happy in exercising the
+seductive power of her other charms, would never consent to unveil
+herself; while the pretty ones would not have to be asked.  The plain
+women would not make us sigh for long; they would be easily subdued
+on the condition of remaining veiled, and if they did consent to
+unmask, it would be only after they had practically convinced one
+that enjoyment is possible without facial beauty.  And it is evident
+and undeniable that inconstancy only proceeds from the variety of
+features.  If a man did not see the face, he would always be constant
+and always in love with the first woman who had taken his fancy.  I
+know that in the opinion of the foolish all this will seem folly, but
+I shall not be on the earth to answer their objections.
+
+When I had left the bath, she wiped me with towels, put on my shirt,
+and then in the same state--that is, quite naked, she did my hair.
+
+While I was dressing she dressed herself too, and having soon
+finished she came to buckle my shoes.  I then gave her half-a-crown
+for the bath and six francs for herself; she kept the half-crown, but
+gave me back the six francs with silent contempt.  I was mortified; I
+saw that I had offended her, and that she considered her behaviour
+entitled her to respect.  I went away in a bad enough humour.
+
+After supper I could not help telling my dear Dubois of the adventure
+I had had in the afternoon, and she made her own comments on the
+details.  "She can't have been pretty," said she, "for if she had
+been, you would certainly have given way.  I should like to see her."
+
+"If you like I will take you there."
+
+"I should be delighted."
+
+"But you will have to dress like a man:"
+
+She rose, went out without a word, and in a quarter of an hour
+returned in a suit of Le Duc's, but minus the trousers, as she had
+certain protuberances which would have stood out too much I told her
+to take a pair of my breeches, and we settled to go to the bath next
+morning.
+
+She came to wake at six o'clock.  She was dressed like a man, and
+wore a blue overcoat which disguised her shape admirably.  I rose and
+went to La Mata, as the place is called.
+
+Animated by the pleasure the expedition gave her, my dear Dubois
+looked radiant.  Those who saw her must have seen through her
+disguise, she was so evidently a woman; so she wrapped herself up in
+her overcoat as well as she could.
+
+As soon as we arrived we saw the master of the baths, who asked me if
+I wanted a closet for four, and I replied in the affirmative.  We
+were soon surrounded by the girls, and I shewed my housekeeper the
+one who had not seduced me; she made choice of her, and I having
+fixed upon a big, determined-looking wench, we shut ourselves up in
+the bath.
+
+As soon as I was undressed I went into the water with my big
+attendant.  My housekeeper was not so quick; the novelty of the thing
+astonished her, and her expression told me that she repented of
+having come; but putting a good face on it, she began to laugh at
+seeing me rubbed by the feminine grenadier.  She had some trouble
+before she could take off her chemise, but as it is only the first
+step that costs, she let it fall off, and though she held her two
+hands before her she dazzled me, in spite of myself, by the beauty of
+her form.  Her attendant prepared to treat her as she had treated me,
+but she begged to be left alone; and on my following her example she
+felt obliged to let me look after her.
+
+The two Swiss girls, who had no doubt often been present at a similar
+situation, began to give us a spectacle which was well known to me,
+but which was quite strange to my dear Dubois.
+
+These two Bacchantes began to imitate the caresses I lavished on my
+housekeeper, who was quite astonished at the amorous fury with which
+my attendant played the part of a man with the other girl.  I confess
+I was a little surprised myself, in spite of the transports which my
+fair Venetian nun had shewn me six years before in conjunction with
+C---- C----.
+
+I could not have imagined that anything of the kind could have
+distracted my attention, holding, as I did, the woman I loved, whose
+charms were sufficient to captivate all the senses; but the strange
+strife of the two young Menads took up her attention as well as mine.
+
+"Your attendant," said she, "must be a boy, not a girl."
+
+"But," said I, "you saw her breasts."
+
+"Yes, but she may be a boy all the same."
+
+The big Swiss girl who had heard what we had said turned round and
+shewed me what I should not have credited.  There could be no
+mistake, however.  It was a feminine membrane, but much longer than
+my little finger, and stiff enough to penetrate.  I explained to my
+dear Dubois what it was, but to convince her I had to make her touch
+it.  The impudent creature pushed her shamelessness so far as to
+offer to try it on her, and she insisted so passionately that I was
+obliged to push her away.  She then turned to her companion and
+satiated on her body her fury of lust.  In spite of its disgusting
+nature, the sight irritated us to such a degree that my housekeeper
+yielded to nature and granted me all I could desire.
+
+This entertainment lasted for two hours, and we returned to the town
+well pleased with one another.  On leaving the bath I gave a Louis to
+each of the two Bacchantes, and we went away determined to go there
+no more.  It will be understood that after what had happened there
+could be no further obstacle to the free progress of our love; and
+accordingly my dear Dubois became my mistress, and we made each other
+happy during all the time we spent at Berne.  I was quite cured of my
+misadventure with the horrible widow, and I found that if love's
+pleasures are fleeting so are its pains.  I will go farther and
+maintain that the pleasures are of much longer duration, as they
+leave memories which can be enjoyed in old age, whereas, if a man
+does happen to remember the pains, it is so slightly as to have no
+influence upon his happiness.
+
+At ten o'clock the Mayor of Thun was announced.  He was dressed in
+the French fashion, in black, and had a manner at once graceful and
+polite that pleased me.  He was middle-aged, and enjoyed a
+considerable position in the Government.  He insisted on my reading
+the letter that M. de Chavigni had written to him on my account.  It
+was so flattering that I told him that if it had not been sealed I
+should not have had the face to deliver it.  He asked me for the next
+day to a supper composed of men only, and for the day after that, to
+a supper at which women as well as men would be present.  I went with
+him to the library where we saw M. Felix, an unfrocked monk, more of
+a scribbler than a scholar, and a young man named Schmidt, who gave
+good promise, and was already known to advantage in the literary
+world.  I also had the misfortune of meeting here a very learned man
+of a very wearisome kind; he knew the names of ten thousand shells by
+heart, and I was obliged to listen to him for two hours, although I
+was totally ignorant of his science.  Amongst other things he told me
+that the Aar contained gold.  I replied that all great rivers
+contained gold, but he shrugged his shoulders and did not seem
+convinced.
+
+I dined with M. de Muralt in company with four or five of the most
+distinguished women in Berne.  I liked them very well, and above all
+Madame de Saconai struck me as particularly amiable and well-
+educated.  I should have paid my addresses to her if I had been
+staying long in the so-called capital of Switzerland.
+
+The ladies of Berne are well though not extravagantly dressed, as
+luxury is forbidden by the laws.  Their manners are good and they
+speak French with perfect ease.  They enjoy the greatest liberty
+without abusing it, for in spite of gallantry decency reigns
+everywhere.  The husbands are not jealous, but they require their
+wives to be home by supper-time.
+
+I spent three weeks in the town, my time being divided between my
+dear Dubois and an old lady of eighty-five who interested me greatly
+by her knowledge of chemistry.  She had been intimately connected
+with the celebrated Boerhaave, and she shewed me a plate of gold he
+had transmuted in her presence from copper.  I believed as much as I
+liked of this, but she assured me that Boerhaave possessed the
+philosopher's stone, but that he had not discovered the secret of
+prolonging life many years beyond the century.  Boerhaave, however,
+was not able to apply this knowledge to himself, as he died of a
+polypus on the heart before he had attained the age of perfect
+maturity, which Hypocrates fixes at between sixty and seventy years.
+The four millions he left to his daughter, if they do not prove that
+he could make gold, certainly prove that he could save it.  The
+worthy old woman told me he had given her a manuscript in which the
+whole process was explained, but that she found it very obscure.
+
+"You should publish it," said I.
+
+"God forbid!"
+
+"Burn it, then."
+
+"I can't make up my mind to do so."
+
+M. de Muralt took me to see the military evolutions gone through by
+the citizens of Berne, who are all soldiers, and I asked him the
+meaning of the bear to be seen above the gate of the town.  The
+German for bear is 'bar', 'bern', and the animal has given its name
+to the town and canton which rank second in the Republic, although it
+is in the first place for its wealth and culture.  It is a peninsula
+formed by the Aar, which rises near the Rhine.  The mayor spoke to me
+of the power of the canton, its lordships and bailiwicks, and
+explained his own powers; he then described the public policy, and
+told me of the different systems of government which compose the
+Helvetic Union.
+
+"I understand perfectly well," I said, "that each of the thirteen
+cantons has its own government."
+
+"I daresay you do," he replied, "but what you don't understand any
+more than I do is, that there is a canton which has four separate
+governments."
+
+I had an excellent supper with fourteen or fifteen senators.  There
+were no jokes, no frivolous conversation, and no literature; but law,
+the commonweal, commerce, political economy, speculation, love of
+country, and the duty of preferring liberty to life, in abundance.
+
+I felt as if I were in a new element, but I enjoyed the privilege of
+being a man amidst men who were all in honour to our common humanity.
+But as the supper went on, these rigid republicans began to expand,
+the discourse became less measured, there were even some bursts of
+laughter, owing to the wine.  I excited their pity, and though they
+praised sobriety they thought mine excessive.  However, they
+respected my liberty, and did not oblige me to drink, as the
+Russians, Swedes, Poles, and most northern peoples do.
+
+We parted at midnight--a very late hour in Switzerland, and as they
+wished me a good night, each of them made me a sincere offer of his
+friendship.  One of the company at an early period of the supper,
+before he had begun to get mellow, had condemned the Venetian
+Republic for banishing the Grisons, but on his intellect being
+enlightened by Bacchus he made his apologies.
+
+"Every government," said he, "ought to know its own interests better
+than strangers, and everybody should be allowed to do what he wills
+with his own."
+
+When I got home I found my housekeeper lying in my bed.  I gave her a
+hundred caresses in witness of my joy, and I assured her practically
+of my love and gratitude.  I considered her as my wife, we cherished
+each other, and did not allow the thought of separating to enter our
+minds.  When two lovers love each other in all freedom, the idea of
+parting seems impossible.
+
+Next morning I got a letter from the worthy Madame d'Urfe, who begged
+me to call on Madame de la Saone, wife of a friend of hers--a
+lieutenant-general.  This lady had come to Berne in the hope of
+getting cured of a disease which had disfigured her in an incredible
+manner.  Madame de la Saone was immediately introduced to all the
+best society in the place.  She gave a supper every day, only asking
+men; she had an excellent cook.  She had given notice that she would
+pay no calls, and she was quite right.  I hastened to make my bow to
+her; but, good Heavens! what a terrible and melancholy sight did I
+behold!
+
+I saw a woman dressed with the utmost elegance, reclining
+voluptuously upon a couch.  As soon as she saw me she arose, gave me
+a most gracious reception, and going back to her couch invited me to
+sit beside her.  She doubtless noticed my surprise, but being
+probably accustomed to the impression which the first sight of her
+created, she talked on in the most friendly manner, and by so doing
+diminished my aversion.
+
+Her appearance was as follows: Madame de Saone was beautifully
+dressed, and had the whitest hands and the roundest arms that can be
+imagined.  Her dress, which was cut very low, allowed me to see an
+exquisite breast of dazzling whiteness, heightened by two rosy buds;
+her figure was good, and her feet the smallest I have ever seen.  All
+about her inspired love, but when one's eyes turned to her face every
+other feeling gave way to those of horror and pity.  She was fearful.
+Instead of a face, one saw a blackened and disgusting scab.  No
+feature was distinguishable, and her ugliness was made more
+conspicuous and dreadful by two fine eyes full of fire, and by a
+lipless mouth which she kept parted, as if to disclose two rows of
+teeth of dazzling whiteness.  She could not laugh, for the pain
+caused by the contraction of the muscles would doubtless have drawn
+tears to her eyes; nevertheless she appeared contented, her
+conversation was delightful, full of wit and humour, and permeated
+with the tone of good society.  She might be thirty at the most, and
+she had left three beautiful young children behind in Paris.  Her
+husband was a fine, well-made man, who loved her tenderly, and had
+never slept apart from her.  It is probable that few soldiers have
+shewn such courage as this, but it is to be supposed that he did not
+carry his bravery so far as to kiss her, as the very thought made one
+shudder.  A disorder contracted after her first child-bed had left
+the poor woman in this sad state, and she had borne it for ten years.
+All the best doctors in France had tried in vain to cure her, and she
+had come to Berne to put herself into the hands of two well-known
+physicians who had promised to do so.  Every quack makes promises of
+this sort; their patients are cured or not cured as it happens, and
+provided that they pay heavily the doctor is ready enough to lay the
+fault, not on his ignorance, but at the door of his poor deluded
+patient.
+
+The doctor came while I was with her, and just as her intelligent
+conversation was making me forget her face.  She had already began to
+take his remedies, which were partly composed of mercury.
+
+"It seems to me," said she, "that the itching has increased since I
+have taken your medicines."
+
+"It will last," said the son of AEsculapius, "till the end of the
+cure, and that will take about three months."
+
+"As long as I scratch myself," said she, "I shall be in the same
+state, and the cure will never be completed."
+
+The doctor replied in an evasive manner.  I rose to take my leave,
+and holding my hand she asked me to supper once for all.  I went the
+same evening; the poor woman took everything and drank some wine, as
+the doctor had not put her on any diet.  I saw that she would never
+be cured.
+
+Her good temper and her charming conversational powers kept all the
+company amused.  I conceived that it would be possible to get used to
+her face, and to live with her without being disgusted.  In the
+evening I talked about her to my housekeeper, who said that the
+beauty of her body and her mental endowments might be sufficient to
+attract people to her.  I agreed, though I felt that I could never
+become one of her lovers.
+
+Three or four days after, I went to a bookseller's to read the
+newspaper, and was politely accosted by a fine young man of twenty,
+who said that Madame de la Saone was sorry not to have seen me again
+at supper.
+
+"You know the lady?"
+
+"I had the honour to sup at her house with you."
+
+"True; I remember you."
+
+"I get her the books she likes, as I am a bookseller, and not only do
+I sup with her every evening, but we breakfast together every morning
+before she gets up."
+
+"I congratulate you.  I bet you are in love with her."
+
+"You are pleased to jest, but she is pleasanter than you think."
+
+"I do not jest at all, but I would wager she would not have the
+courage to push things to an extremity."
+
+"Perhaps you would lose."
+
+"Really?  I should be very glad to."
+
+"Let us make a bet."
+
+"How will you convince me I have lost?"
+
+"Let us bet a louis, and you must promise to be discreet."
+
+"Very good."
+
+"Come and sup at her house this evening, and I will tell you
+something."
+
+"You shall see me there."
+
+When I got home I told my housekeeper what I had heard.
+
+"I am curious to know," said she, "how he will convince you."  I
+promised to tell her, which pleased her very much.
+
+I was exact to my appointment.  Madame de la Saone reproached me
+pleasantly for my absence, and gave me a delicious supper.  The young
+bookseller was there, but as his sweetheart did not speak a word to
+him he said nothing and passed unnoticed.
+
+After supper we went out together, and he told me on the way that if
+I liked he would satisfy me the next morning at eight o'clock.  "Call
+here, and the lady's maid will tell you her mistress is not visible,
+but you have only to say that you will wait, and that you will go
+into the ante-chamber.  This room has a glass door commanding a view
+of madame's bed, and I will take care to draw back the curtains over
+the door so that you will be able to see at your ease all that passes
+between us.  When the affair is over I shall go out by another door,
+she will call her maid, and you will be shewn in.  At noon, if you
+will allow me, I will bring you some books to the 'Falcon,' and if
+you find that you have lost you shall pay me my louis."  I promised
+to carry out his directions, and we parted.
+
+I was curious to see what would happen, though I by no means regarded
+it as an impossibility; and on my presenting myself at eight o'clock,
+the maid let me in as soon as I said that I could wait.  I found a
+corner of the glass door before which there was no curtain, and on
+applying my eye to the place I saw my young adventurer holding his
+conquest in his arms on the bed.  An enormous nightcap entirely
+concealed her face--an excellent precaution which favoured the
+bookseller's enterprise.
+
+When the rascal saw that I had taken up my position, he did not keep
+me waiting, for, getting up, he presented to my dazzled gaze, not
+only the secret treasures of his sweetheart, but his own also.  He
+was a small man, but where the lady was most concerned he was a
+Hercules, and the rogue seemed to make a parade of his proportions as
+if to excite my jealousy.  He turned his victim round so that I
+should see her under all aspects, and treated her manfully, while she
+appeared to respond to his ardour with all her might.  Phidias could
+not have modelled his Venus on a finer body; her form was rounded and
+voluptuous, and as white as Parian marble.  I was affected in a
+lively manner by the spectacle, and re-entered my lodging so inflamed
+that if my dear Dubois had not been at hand to quench my fire I
+should have been obliged to have extinguished it in the baths of La
+Mata.
+
+When I had told her my tale she wanted to know the hero of it, and at
+noon she had that pleasure.  The young bookseller brought me some
+books I had ordered, and while paying him for them I gave him our bet
+and a Louis over and above as a mark of my satisfaction at his
+prowess.  He took it with a smile which seemed to shew that he
+thought I ought to think myself lucky to have lost.  My housekeeper
+looked at him for some time, and asked if he knew her; he said he did
+not.
+
+"I saw you when you were a child," said she.  "You are the son of M.
+Mignard, minister of the Gospel.  You must have been ten when I saw
+you."
+
+"Possibly, madam."
+
+"You did not care to follow your father's profession, then?"
+
+"No madam, I feel much more inclined to the worship of the creature
+than to that of the Creator, and I did not think my father's
+profession would suit me."
+
+"You are right, for a minister of the Gospel ought to be discreet,
+and discretion is a restraint."
+
+This stroke made him blush, but we did not give him time to lose
+courage.  I asked him to dine with me, and without mentioning the
+name of Madame de la Saone he told his amorous adventures and
+numerous anecdotes about the pretty women of Berne.
+
+After he had gone, my housekeeper said that once was quite enough to
+see a young man of his complexion.  I agreed with her, and had no
+more to do with him; but I heard that Madame de Saone took him to
+Paris and made his fortune.  Many fortunes are made in this manner,
+and there are some which originated still more nobly.  I only
+returned to Madame de la Saone to take my leave, as I shall shortly
+relate.
+
+I was happy with my charmer, who told me again and again that with me
+she lived in bliss.  No fears or doubts as to the future troubled her
+mind; she was certain, as I was, that we should never leave each
+other; and she told me she would pardon all the infidelities I might
+be guilty of, provided I made full confession.  Hers, indeed, was a
+disposition with which to live in peace and content, but I was not
+born to enjoy such happiness.
+
+After we had been a fortnight at Berne, my housekeeper received a
+letter from Soleure.  It came from Lebel.  As I saw she read it with
+great attention, I asked her what it was about.
+
+"Take it and read it," said she; and she sat down in front of me to
+read my soul by the play of my features.
+
+Lebel asked her, in concise terms, if she would become his wife.
+
+"I have only put off the proposition," said he, "to set my affairs in
+order, and to see if I could afford to marry you, even if the consent
+of the ambassador were denied us.  I find I am rich enough to live
+well in Berne or elsewhere without the necessity of my working;
+however I shall not have to face the alternative, for at the first
+hint of the matter M. de Chavigni gave his consent with the best
+grace imaginable."
+
+He went on begging her not to keep him long waiting for a reply, and
+to tell him in the first place if she consented; in the second,
+whether she would like to live at Berne and be mistress in her own
+house, or whether she would prefer to return to Soleure and live with
+the ambassador, which latter plan might bring them some profit.  He
+ended by declaring that whatever she had would be for her sole use,
+and that he would give her a dower of a hundred thousand francs.  He
+did not say a word about me.
+
+"Dearest," said I, "you are at perfect liberty to choose your own
+course, but I cannot contemplate your leaving me without considering
+myself as the most unhappy of men."
+
+"And if I lose you I should be the most unhappy of women; for if you
+love me I care not whether we are married or no."
+
+"Very good; but what answer are you going to make."
+
+"You shall see my letter to-morrow.  I shall tell him politely but
+plainly that I love you, that I am yours, that I am happy, and that
+it is thus impossible for me to accept his flattering propositions.
+I shall also say that I appreciate his generosity, and that if I were
+wise I should accept him, but that being the slave of my love for you
+I can only follow my inclination."
+
+"I think you give an excellent turn to your letter.  In refusing such
+an offer you could not have better reasons than those you give, and
+it would be absurd to try and persuade him that we are not lovers, as
+the thing is self-evident.  Nevertheless, my darling, the letter
+saddens me."
+
+"Why, dearest?"
+
+"Because I have not a hundred thousand francs to offer you."
+
+"I despise them; and if you were to offer me such a sum, I should
+only accept it to lay it at your feet.  You are certainly not
+destined to become miserable, but if that should come to pass, be
+sure that I should be only too happy to share your misery."
+
+We fell into one another's arms, and love made us taste all its
+pleasures.  Nevertheless, in the midst of bliss, some tinge of
+sadness gained upon our souls.  Languishing love seems to redouble
+its strength, but it is only in appearance; sadness exhausts love
+more than enjoyment.  Love is a madcap who must be fed on laughter
+and mirth, otherwise he dies of inanition.
+
+Next day my sweetheart wrote to Lebel in the sense she had decided
+on, and I felt obliged to write M. de Chavigni a letter in which
+love, sentiment, and philosophy were mingled.  I did not conceal from
+him that I loved the woman whom Lebel coveted to distraction, but I
+said that as a man of honour I would rather die than deprive my
+sweetheart of such solid advantages.
+
+My letter delighted the housekeeper, for she was anxious to know what
+the ambassador thought of the affair, which needed much reflection.
+
+I got on the same day the letters of introduction I had asked Madame
+d'Urfe to give me, and I determined, to the joy of my dear Dubois, to
+set out for Lausanne.  But we must hark back a little.
+
+When one is sincerely in love, one thinks the beloved object full of
+deserts, and the mind, the dupe of the feelings, thinks all the world
+jealous of its bliss.
+
+A. M. de F----, member of the Council of the Two Hundred, whom I had
+met at Madame de la Saone's, had become my friend.  He came to see me
+and I introduced him to my dear Dubois, whom he treated with the same
+distinction he would have used towards my wife.  He had presented us
+to his wife, and had come several times to see us with her and her
+daughter Sara.  Sara was only thirteen, but she was extremely
+precocious, dark complexioned, and full of wit; she was continually
+uttering naivetes, of which she understood the whole force, although
+looking at her face one would have thought her perfectly innocent.
+She excelled in the art of making her father and mother believe in
+her innocence, and thus she enjoyed plenty of liberty.
+
+Sara had declared that she was in love with my housekeeper, and as
+her parents laughed at her she lavished her caresses on my dear
+Dubois.  She often came to breakfast with us, and when she found us
+in bed she would embrace my sweetheart, whom she called her wife,
+passing her hand over the coverlet to tickle her, telling her that
+she was her wife, and that she wanted to have a child.  My sweetheart
+laughed and let her go on.
+
+One day I told her jokingly that she would make me jealous, that I
+thought she really was a man, and that I was going to make sure.  The
+sly little puss told me that I was making a mistake, but her hand
+seemed rather to guide mine than to oppose it.  That made me curious,
+and my mind was soon set at rest as to her sex.  Perceiving that she
+had taken me in and got exactly what she wanted, I drew back my hand,
+and imparted my suspicions to my housekeeper, who said I was right.
+However, as the little girl had no part in my affections, I did not
+push the thing any farther.
+
+Two or three days after, this girl came in as I was getting up, and
+said in her usual simple way,
+
+"Now that you know I am not really a man you can not be jealous or
+have objection to my taking your place beside my little wife, if she
+will let me."
+
+My housekeeper, who looked inclined to laugh, said,
+
+"Come along."
+
+In the twinkling of an eye she was undressed and in the arms of her
+little wife, whom she proceeded to treat as an amorous husband.  My
+sweetheart laughed, and Sara, having contrived in the combat to rid
+herself of her chemise and the coverlet, displayed herself to me
+without any veil, while at the same time she shewed me all the
+beauties of my sweetheart.  This sight inflamed me.  I shut the door,
+and made the little hussy witness of my ardour with my sweetheart.
+Sara looked on attentively, playing the part of astonishment to
+perfection, and when I had finished she said, with the utmost
+simplicity,
+
+"Do it again:"
+
+"I can't, my dear; don't you see I am a dead man?"
+
+"That's very funny," she cried; and with the most perfect innocence
+she came over, and tried to effect my resurrection.
+
+When she had succeeded in placing me in the wished-for condition, she
+said, "Now go in;" and I should doubtless have obeyed, but my
+housekeeper said, "No, dearest, since you have effected its
+resurrection, you must make it die again."
+
+"I should like to," said she, "but I am afraid I have not got enough
+room;" and so saying she placed herself in a position to shew me that
+she was speaking the truth, and that if she did not make me die it
+was not her fault.
+
+Imitating her simplicity I approached her, as if I wished to oblige
+her, but not to go too far; but not finding any resistance I
+accomplished the act in all its forms, without her giving the
+slightest evidence of pain, without any of the accidents of a first
+trial, but, on the contrary, with all the marks of the utmost
+enjoyment.
+
+Although I was sure of the contrary, I kept my self-possession enough
+to tell my housekeeper that Sara had given me what can only be given
+once, and she pretended to believe me.
+
+When the operation was finished, we had another amusing scene.  Sara
+begged us not to say a word about it to her papa or mamma, as they
+would be sure to scold her as they had scolded her when she got her
+ears pierced without asking their leave.
+
+Sara knew that we saw through her feigned simplicity, but she
+pretended not to do so as it was to her own advantage.  Who could
+have instructed her in the arts of deceit?   Nobody; only her natural
+wit, less rare in childhood than in youth, but always rare and
+astonishing.  Her mother said her simplicities shewed that she would
+one day be very intelligent, and her father maintained that they were
+signs of her stupidity.  But if Sara had been stupid, our bursts of
+laughter would have disconcerted her; and she would have died for
+shame, instead of appearing all the better pleased when her father
+deplored her stupidity.  She would affect astonishment, and by way of
+curing one sort of stupidity she corroborated it by displaying
+another.  She asked us questions to which we could not reply, and
+laughed at her instead, although it was evident that before putting
+such questions she must have reasoned over them.  She might have
+rejoined that the stupidity was on our side, but by so doing she
+would have betrayed herself.
+
+Lebel did not reply to his sweetheart, but M. de Chavigni wrote me a
+letter of four pages.  He spoke like a philosopher and an experienced
+man of the world.
+
+He shewed me that if I were an old man like him, and able to insure a
+happy and independent existence to my sweetheart after my death, I
+should do well to keep her from all men, especially as there was so
+perfect a sympathy between us; but that as I was a young man, and did
+not intend to bind myself to her by the ties of marriage, I should
+not only consent to a union which seemed for her happiness, but that
+as a man of honour it was my duty to use my influence with her in
+favour of the match.  "With your experience," said the kind old
+gentleman, "you ought to know that a time would come when you would
+regret both having lost this opportunity, for your love is sure to
+become friendship, and then another love will replace that which you
+now think as firm as the god Terminus.
+
+"Lebel," he added, "has told me his plans, and far from disapproving,
+I have encouraged him, for your charming friend won my entire esteem
+in the five or six times I had the pleasure of seeing her with you.
+I shall be delighted, therefore, to have her in my house, where I can
+enjoy her conversation without transgressing the laws of propriety.
+Nevertheless, you will understand that at my age I have formed no
+desires, for I could not satisfy them even if their object were
+propitious."  He ended by telling me that Lebel had not fallen in
+love in a young man's style, that he had reflected on what he was
+doing, and that he would consequently not hurry her, as she would see
+in the letter he was going to send her.  A marriage ought always to
+be undertaken in cold blood.
+
+I gave the letter to my housekeeper, who read it attentively, and
+gave it back to me quite coolly.
+
+"What do you think of his advice, dearest?"
+
+"I think I had better follow it: he says there is no hurry, and delay
+is all we want.  Let us love each other and think only of that.  This
+letter is written with great wisdom, but I cannot imagine our
+becoming indifferent to each other, though I know such a thing is
+possible."
+
+"Never indifferent; you make a mistake there."
+
+"Well, friends, then; and that is not much better after being
+lovers."
+
+"But friendship, dearest, is never indifferent.  Love, it is true,
+may be in its composition.  We know it, as it has been thus from the
+beginning of the world."
+
+"Then the ambassador was right.  Repentance might come and torment us
+when love had been replaced by calmer friendship."
+
+"If you think so, let us marry each other to-morrow, and punish
+thereby the vices of our human nature."
+
+"Yes, we will marry, but there is no hurry; fearing lest hymen should
+quicken the departure of love, let us enjoy our happiness while we
+can."
+
+"You speak admirably, my angel, and deserve the greatest good
+fortune."
+
+"I wish for no greater than what you procure me."
+
+We went to bed, continuing our discussions, and when we were in each
+other's arms we made an arrangement which suited us very well.
+
+"Lausanne," said she, "is a little town where you would meet with the
+warmest hospitality, and during your fortnight's stay you will have
+nothing to do but to make visits and to go to suppers.  I am known to
+all the nobility, and the Duke of Rosebury, who wearied me with his
+love-making, is still there.  My appearance with you will make
+everybody talk, and it will be as annoying for you as for me.  My
+mother lives there, too.  She would say nothing, but in her heart she
+would be ill-pleased to see me as the housekeeper of a man like you,
+for common sense would inform everyone that I was your mistress."
+
+I thought she was right, and that it would be well to respect the
+rules of society.  We decided that she should go to Lausanne by
+herself and stay with her mother, that in two or three days I should
+follow her, and should live by myself, as long as I liked, having
+full liberty to see her at her mother's.
+
+"When you leave Lausanne," said she, "I will rejoin you at Geneva,
+and then we will travel together where you please and as long as our
+love lasts."
+
+In two days she started early in the morning, sure of my constancy,
+and congratulating herself on her discretion.  I was sad at her
+leaving me, but my calls to take leave served to rouse me from my
+grief.  I wished to make M. Haller's acquaintance before I left
+Switzerland, and the mayor, M. de Muralt, gave me a letter of
+introduction to him very handsomely expressed.  M. de Haller was the
+bailiff of Roche.
+
+When I called to take leave of Madame de la Saone I found her in bed,
+and I was obliged to remain by her bedside for a quarter of an hour.
+She spoke of her disease, and gave the conversation such a turn that
+she was able with perfect propriety to let me see that the ravages of
+the disease had not impaired the beauty of her body.  The sight
+convinced me that Mignard had need of less courage than I thought,
+and I was within an inch of doing her the same service.  It was easy
+enough to look only at her body, and it would have been difficult to
+behold anything more beautiful.
+
+I know well that prudes and hypocrites, if they ever read these
+Memoirs, will be scandalized at the poor lady, but in shewing her
+person so readily she avenged herself on the malady which had
+disfigured her.  Perhaps, too, her goodness of heart and politeness
+told her what a trial it was to look at her face, and she wished to
+indemnify the man who disguised his feelings of repugnance by shewing
+him what gifts nature had given her.  I am sure, ladies, that the
+most prudish--nay, the most virtuous, amongst you, if you were
+unfortunate enough to be so monstrously deformed in the face, would
+introduce some fashion which would conceal your ugliness, and display
+those beauties which custom hides from view.  And doubtless Madame de
+la Saone would have been more chary of her person if she had been
+able to enchant with her face like you.
+
+The day I left I dined with M---- I----, and was severely taken to
+task by pretty Sara for having sent her little wife away before me.
+The reader will see how I met her again at London three years later.
+Le Duc was still in the doctor's hands, and very weak; but I made him
+go with me, as I had a good deal of property, and I could not trust
+it to anybody else.
+
+I left Berne feeling naturally very sad.  I had been happy there, and
+to this day the thought of it is a pleasant one.
+
+I had to consult Dr. Herrenschwand about Madame d'Urfe, so I stopped
+at Morat, where he lived, and which is only four leagues from Berne.
+The doctor made me dine with him that I might try the fish of the
+lake, which I found delicious.  I had intended to go on directly
+after dinner, but I was delayed by a curiosity of which I shall
+inform the reader.
+
+After I had given the doctor a fee of two Louis for his advice, in
+writing, on a case of tapeworm, he made me walk with him by the
+Avanches road, and we went as far as the famous mortuary of Morat.
+
+"This mortuary," said the doctor, "was constructed with part of the
+bones of the Burgundians, who perished here at the well-known battle
+lost by Charles the Bold."
+
+The Latin inscription made me laugh.
+
+"This inscription," said I, "contains an insulting jest; it is almost
+burlesque, for the gravity of an inscription should not allow of
+laughter."
+
+The doctor, like a patriotic Swiss, would not allow it, but I think
+it was false shame on his part.  The inscription ran as follows, and
+the impartial reader can judge of its nature:
+
+     "Deo. opt. Max.  Caroli inclyti et fortisimi Burgundie duds
+     exercitus Muratum obsidens, ab Helvetiis cesus, hoc sui
+     monumentum reliquit anno MCDLXXVI."
+
+Till then I had had a great idea of Morat.  Its fame of seven
+centuries, three sieges sustained and repulsed, all had given me a
+sublime notion of it; I expected to see something and saw nothing.
+
+"Then Morat has been razed to the ground?" said I to the doctor.
+
+"Not at all, it is as it always has been, or nearly so."
+
+I concluded that a man who wants to be well informed should read
+first and then correct his knowledge by travel.  To know ill is worse
+than not to know at all, and Montaigne says that we ought to know
+things well.
+
+But it was the following comic adventure which made me spend the
+night at Morat:
+
+I found at the inn a young maid who spoke a sort of rustic Italian.
+She struck me by her great likeness to my fair stocking-seller at
+Paris.  She was called Raton, a name which my memory has happily
+preserved.  I offered her six francs for her favours, but she refused
+the money with a sort of pride, telling me that I had made a mistake
+and that she was an honest girl.
+
+"It may be so," said I, and I ordered my horses to be put in.  When
+the honest Raton saw me on the point of leaving, she said, with an
+air that was at once gay and timid, that she wanted two louis, and if
+I liked to give her them and pass the night with her I should be well
+content.
+
+"I will stay, but remember to be kind."
+
+"I will."
+
+When everybody had gone to bed, she came into my room with a little
+frightened manner, calculated to redouble my ardour, but by great
+good luck, feeling I had a necessity, I took the light and ran to the
+place where I could satisfy it.  While there I amused myself by
+reading innumerable follies one finds written in such places, and
+suddenly my eyes lighted on these words:--
+
+"This tenth day of August, 1760, the wretched Raton gave me the what-
+d'-you-call-it: reader, beware."
+
+I was almost tempted to believe in miracles, for I could not think
+there were two Ratons in the same house.  I returned gaily to my room
+and found my sweetheart in bed without her chemise.  I went to the
+place beside the bed where she had thrown it down, and as soon as she
+saw me touching it she begged me in a fright not to do so, as it was
+not clean.  She was right, for it bore numerous marks of the disease
+which infected her.  It may be imagined that my passion cooled, and
+that I sent her away in a moment; but I felt at the same time the
+greatest gratitude to what is called chance, for I should have never
+thought of examining a girl whose face was all lilies and roses, and
+who could not be more than eighteen.
+
+Next day I went to Roche to see the celebrated Haller.
+
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVIII
+
+M. Haller--My Stay at Lausanne--Lord Rosebury--The Young Saconai--
+Dissertation on Beauty--The Young Theologian
+
+
+M. Haller was a man six feet high and broad in a proportion; he was a
+well-made man, and a physical as well as a mental colossus.  He
+received me courteously, and when he had read M. de Muralt's letter,
+he displayed the greatest politeness, which shews that a good letter
+of introduction is never out of place.  This learned man displayed to
+me all the treasures of his knowledge, replying with exactitude to
+all my questions, and above all with a rare modesty which astonished
+me greatly, for whilst he explained the most difficult questions, he
+had the air of a scholar who would fain know; but on the other hand,
+when he asked me a scientific question, it was with so delicate an
+art that I could not help giving the right answer.
+
+M. de Haller was a great physiologist, a great doctor, and a great
+anatomist.  He called Morgagni his master, though he had himself made
+numerous discoveries relating to the frame of man.  While I stayed
+with him he shewed me a number of letters from Morgagni and
+Pontedera, a professor of botany, a science of which Haller had an
+extensive knowledge.  Hearing me speak of these learned men whose
+works I had read at an early age, he complained that Pontedera's
+letters were almost illegible and written in extremely obscure Latin.
+He shewed me a letter from a Berlin Academician, whose name I have
+forgotten, who said that since the king had read his letter he had no
+more thoughts of suppressing the Latin language.  Haller had written
+to Frederick the Great that a monarch who succeeded in the unhappy
+enterprise of proscribing the language of Cicero and Virgil from the
+republic of letters would raise a deathless monument to his own
+ignorance.  If men of letters require a universal language to
+communicate with one another, Latin is certainly the best, for Greek
+and Arabic do not adapt themselves in the same way to the genius of
+modern civilization.
+
+Haller was a good poet of the Pindaric kind; he was also an excellent
+statesman, and had rendered great services to his country.  His
+morals were irreproachable, and I remember his telling me that the
+only way to give precepts was to do so by example.  As a good citizen
+he was an admirable paterfamilias, for what greater proof could he
+give of his love of country than by presenting it with worthy
+subjects in his children, and such subjects result from a good
+education.  His wife was still young, and bore on her features the
+marks of good nature and discretion.  He had a charming daughter of
+about eighteen; her appearance was modest, and at table she only
+opened her mouth to speak in a low tone to a young man who sat beside
+her.  After dinner, finding myself alone with M. Haller, I asked him
+who this young man was.  He told me he was his daughter's tutor.
+
+"A tutor like that and so pretty a pupil might easily become lovers."
+
+"Yes, please God."
+
+This Socratic reply made me see how misplaced my remark had been, and
+I felt some confusion.  Finding a book to my hand I opened it to
+restore my composure.
+
+It was an octavo volume of his works, and I read in it:
+
+"Utrum memoria post mortem dubito."
+
+"You do not think, then," said I, "that the memory is an essential
+part of the soul?"
+
+"How is that question to be answered?"  M. de Haller replied,
+cautiously, as he had his reasons for being considered orthodox.
+
+During dinner I asked if M. de Voltaire came often to see him.  By
+way of reply he repeated these lines of the poet:--
+
+"Vetabo qui Cereris sacrum vulgarit arcanum sub usdem sit trabibus."
+
+I spent three days with this celebrated man, but I thought myself
+obliged to refrain from asking his opinion on any religious
+questions, although I had a great desire to do so, as it would have
+pleased me to have had his opinion on that delicate subject; but I
+believe that in matters of that kind M. Haller judged only by his
+heart.  I told him, however, that I should consider a visit to
+Voltaire as a great event, and he said I was right.  He added,
+without the slightest bitterness,
+
+"M. de Voltaire is a man who ought to be known, although, in spite of
+the laws of nature, many persons have found him greater at a distance
+than close at hand."
+
+M. de Haller kept a good and abundant though plain table; he only
+drank water.  At dessert only he allowed himself a small glass of
+liqueur drowned in an enormous glass of water.  He talked a great
+deal of Boerhaave, whose favourite pupil he had been.  He said that
+after Hypocrates, Boerhaave was the greatest doctor and the greatest
+chemist that had ever existed.
+
+"How is it," said I, "that he did not attain mature age?"
+
+"Because there is no cure for death.  Boerhaave was born a doctor, as
+Homer was born a poet; otherwise he would have succumbed at the age
+of fourteen to a malignant ulcer which had resisted all the best
+treatment of the day.  He cured it himself by rubbing it constantly
+with salt dissolved in his own urine."
+
+"I have been told that he possessed the philosopher's stone."
+
+"Yes, but I don't believe it."
+
+"Do you think it possible?"
+
+"I have been working for the last thirty years to convince myself of
+its impossibility; I have not yet done so, but I am sure that no one
+who does not believe in the possibility of the great work can be a
+good chemist."
+
+When I left him he begged me to write and tell him what I thought of
+the great Voltaire, and in, this way our French correspondence began.
+I possess twenty-two letters from this justly celebrated man; and the
+last word written six months before, his too, early death.  The
+longer I live the more interest I take in my papers.  They are the
+treasure which attaches me to life and makes death more hateful
+still.
+
+I had been reading at Berne Rousseau's "Heloise," and I asked M.
+Haller's opinion of it.  He told me that he had once read part of it
+to oblige a friend, and from this part he could judge of the whole.
+"It is the worst of all romances, because it is the most eloquently
+expressed.  You will see the country of Vaud, but don't expect to see
+the originals of the brilliant portraits which Jean Jacques painted.
+He seems to have thought that lying was allowable in a romance, but
+he has abused the privilege.  Petrarch, was a learned man, and told
+no lies in speaking of his love for Laura, whom he loved as every man
+loves the woman with whom he is taken; and if Laura had not contented
+her illustrious lover, he would not have celebrated her."
+
+Thus Haller spoke to me of Petrarch, mentioning Rousseau with
+aversion.  He disliked his very eloquence, as he said it owed all its
+merits to antithesis and paradox. Haller was a learned man of the
+first class, but his knowledge was not employed for the purpose of
+ostentation, nor in private life, nor when he was in the company of
+people who did not care for science.  No one knew better than he how
+to accommodate himself to his company he was friendly with everyone,
+and never gave offence.  But what were his qualifications?  It would
+be much easier to say what he had not than what he had.  He had no
+pride, self-sufficiency, nor tone of superiority--in fact, none of
+those defects which are often the reproach of the learned and the
+witty.
+
+He was a man of austere virtue, but he took care to hide the
+austerity under a veil of a real and universal kindness.  Undoubtedly
+he thought little of the ignorant, who talk about everything right or
+wrong, instead of remaining silent, and have at bottom only contempt
+for the learned; but he only shewed his contempt by saying nothing.
+He knew that a despised ignoramus becomes an enemy, and Haller wished
+to be loved.  He neither boasted of nor concealed his knowledge, but
+let it run like a limpid stream flowing through the meadows.  He
+talked well, but never absorbed the conversation.  He never spoke of
+his works; when someone mentioned them he would turn the conversation
+as soon as he conveniently could.  He was sorry to be obliged to
+contradict anyone who conversed with him.
+
+When I reached Lausanne I found myself enabled to retain my incognito
+for a day at any rate.  I naturally gave the first place to my
+affections.  I went straight to my sweetheart without needing to ask
+my way, so well had she indicated the streets through which I had to
+pass.  I found her with her mother, but I was not a little astonished
+to see Lebel there also.  However, my surprise must have passed
+unnoticed, for my housekeeper, rising from her seat with a cry of
+joy, threw her arms about my neck, and after having kissed me
+affectionately presented me to her worthy mother, who welcomed me in
+the friendliest manner.  I asked Lebel after the ambassador, and how
+long he had been at Lausanne.
+
+He replied, with a polite and respectful air, that his master was
+quite well, and that he had come to Lausanne on business, and had
+only been there a few hours; and that, wishing to pay his regards to
+Madame Dubois's mother, he had been pleasantly surprised to see the
+daughter there as well.
+
+"You know," he added, "what my intentions are.  I have to go back to-
+morrow, and when you have made up your minds, write to me and I will
+come and take her to Soleure, where I will marry her."
+
+He could not have spoken more plainly or honourably.  I said that I
+would never oppose the will of my sweetheart, and my Dubois,
+interrupting me, said in her turn that she would never leave me until
+I sent her away.
+
+Lebel found these replies too vague, and told me with noble freedom
+that we must give him a definite reply, since in such cases
+uncertainty spoils all.  At that moment I felt as if I could never
+agree to his wishes, and I told him that in ten days I would let him
+know of our resolution, whatever it was.  At that he was satisfied,
+and left us.
+
+After his departure my sweetheart's mother, whose good sense stood
+her instead of wit, talked to us in a manner that answered our
+inclinations, for, amorous as we were, we could not bear the idea of
+parting.  I agreed that my housekeeper should wait up for me till
+midnight, and that we could talk over our reply with our heads on the
+pillow.
+
+My Dubois had a separate room with a good bed and excellent
+furniture.  She gave me a very good supper, and we spent a delicious
+night.  In the morning we felt more in love than ever, and were not
+at all disposed to comply with Lebel's wishes.  Nevertheless, we had
+a serious conversation.
+
+The reader will remember that my mistress had promised to pardon my
+infidelities, provided that I confessed them.  I had none to confess,
+but in the course of conversation I told her about Raton.
+
+"We ought to think ourselves very fortunate," said she, "for if it
+had not been for chance, we should have been in a fine state now."
+
+"Yes, and I should be in despair."
+
+"I don't doubt it, and you would be all the more wretched as I should
+never complain to you."
+
+"I only see one way of providing against such a misfortune.  When I
+have been unfaithful to you I will punish myself by depriving myself
+of the pleasure of giving you proofs of my affection till I am
+certain that I can do so without danger."
+
+"Ah! you would punish me for your faults, would you?   If you love me
+as I love you, believe me you would find a better remedy than that."
+
+"What is that?"
+
+"You would never be unfaithful to me."
+
+"You are right.  I am sorry I was not the first to think of this
+plan, which I promise to follow for the future."
+
+"Don't make any promises," said she, with a sigh, "it might prove too
+difficult to keep them."
+
+It is only love which can inspire such conversations, but
+unfortunately it gains nothing by them.
+
+Next morning, just as I was going out to take my letters, the Baron
+de Bercei, uncle of my friend Bavois, entered.
+
+"I know," said he, "that my nephew owes his fortune to you; he is
+just going to be made general, and I and all the family will be
+enchanted to make your acquaintance.  I have come to offer my
+services, and to beg that you will dine with me to-day, and on any
+other day you please when you have nothing better to do, and I hope
+you will always consider yourself of the family.
+
+"At the same time I beg of you not to tell anybody that my nephew has
+become a Catholic, as according to the prejudices of the country it
+would be a dishonour which would reflect on the whole family."
+
+I accepted his invitation, and promised to say nothing about the
+circumstance he had mentioned.
+
+I left my letters of introduction, and I received everywhere a
+welcome of the most distinguished kind.  Madame de Gentil-Langalerie
+appeared the most amiable of all the ladies I called on, but I had
+not time to pay my court to one more than another.  Every day
+politeness called me to some dinner, supper, ball, or assembly.  I
+was bored beyond measure, and I felt inclined to say how troublesome
+it is to have such a welcome.  I spent a fortnight in the little
+town, where everyone prides himself on his liberty, and in all my
+life I have never experienced such a slavery, for I had not a moment
+to myself.  I was only able to pass one night with my sweetheart, and
+I longed to set off with her for Geneva.  Everybody would give me
+letters of introduction for M. de Voltaire, and by their eagerness
+one would have thought the great man beloved, whereas all detested
+him on account of his sarcastic humour.
+
+"What, ladies!" said I, "is not M.  de Voltaire good-natured, polite,
+and affable to you who have been kind enough to act in his plays with
+him?"
+
+"Not in the least.  When he hears us rehearse he grumbles all the
+time.  We never say a thing to please him: here it is a bad
+pronunciation, there a tone not sufficiently passionate, sometimes
+one speaks too softly, sometimes too loudly; and it's worse when we
+are acting.  What a hubbub there is if one add a syllable, or if some
+carelessness spoil one of his verses.  He frightens us.  So and so
+laughed badly; so and so in Alzire had only pretended to weep."
+
+"Does he want you to weep really?"
+
+"Certainly.  He will have real tears.  He says that if an actor wants
+to draw tears he must shed them himself."
+
+"I think he is right there; but he should not be so severe with
+amateurs, above all with charming actresses like you.  Such
+perfection is only to be looked for from professionals, but all
+authors are the same.  They never think that the actor has pronounced
+the words with the force which the sense, as they see it, requires."
+
+"I told him, one day, that it was not my fault if his lines had not
+the proper force."
+
+"I am sure he laughed."
+
+"Laughed?   No, sneered, for he is a rude and impertinent man."
+
+"But I suppose you overlook all these failings?"
+
+"Not at all; we have sent him about his business."
+
+"Sent him about his business?"
+
+"Yes.  He left the house he had rented here, at short notice, and
+retired to where you will find him now.  He never comes to see us
+now, even if we ask him."
+
+"Oh, you do ask him, though you sent him about his business?"
+
+"We cannot deprive ourselves of the pleasure of admiring his talents,
+and if we have teased him, that was only from revenge, and to teach
+him something of the manners of good society."
+
+"You have given a lesson to a great master."
+
+"Yes; but when you see him mention Lausanne, and see what he will say
+of us.  But he will say it laughingly, that's his way."
+
+During my stay I often saw Lord Rosebury, who had vainly courted my
+charming Dubois.  I have never known a young man more disposed to
+silence.  I have been told that he had wit, that he was well
+educated, and even in high spirits at times, but he could not get
+over his shyness, which gave him an almost indefinable air of
+stupidity.  At balls, assemblies--in fact, everywhere, his manners
+consisted of innumerable bows.  When one spoke to him, he replied in
+good French but with the fewest possible words, and his shy manner
+shewed that every question was a trouble to him.  One day when I was
+dining with him, I asked him some question about his country, which
+required five or six small phrases by way of answer.  He gave me an
+excellent reply, but blushed all the time like a young girl when she
+comes out.  The celebrated Fox who was then twenty, and was at the
+same dinner, succeeded in making him laugh, but it was by saying
+something in English, which I did not understand in the least.  Eight
+months after I saw him again at Turin, he was then amorous of a
+banker's wife, who was able to untie his tongue.
+
+At Lausanne I saw a young girl of eleven or twelve by whose beauty I
+was exceedingly struck.  She was the daughter of Madame de Saconai,
+whom I had known at Berne.  I do not know her after history, but the
+impression she made on me has never been effaced.  Nothing in nature
+has ever exercised such a powerful influence over me as a pretty
+face, even if it be a child's.
+
+The Beautiful, as I have been told, is endowed with this power of
+attraction; and I would fain believe it, since that which attracts me
+is necessarily beautiful in my eyes, but is it so in reality?   I
+doubt it, as that which has influenced me has not influenced others.
+The universal or perfect beauty does not exist, or it does not
+possess this power.  All who have discussed the subject have
+hesitated to pronounce upon it, which they would not have done if
+they had kept to the idea of form.  According to my ideas, beauty is
+only form, for that which is not beautiful is that which has no form,
+and the deformed is the opposite of the 'pulchrum' and 'formosum'.
+
+We are right to seek for the definitions of things, but when we have
+them to hand in the words; why should we go farther?   If the word
+'forma' is Latin, we should seek for the Latin meaning and not the
+French, which, however, often uses 'deforme' or 'difforme' instead of
+'laid', ugly, without people's noticing that its opposite should be a
+word which implies the existence of form; and this can only be
+beauty.  We should note that 'informe' in French as well as in Latin
+means shapeless, a body without any definite appearance.
+
+We will conclude, then, that it is the beauty of woman which has
+always exercised an irresistible sway over me, and more especially
+that beauty which resides in the face.  It is there the power lies,
+and so true is that, that the sphinxes of Rome and Versailles almost
+make me fall in love with them.  though, the face excepted, they are
+deformed in every sense of the word.  In looking at the fine
+proportions of their faces one forgets their deformed bodies.  What,
+then, is beauty?   We know not; and when we attempt to define it or
+to enumerate its qualities we become like Socrates, we hesitate.  The
+only thing that our minds can seize is the effect produced by it, and
+that which charms, ravishes, and makes me in love, I call beauty.  It
+is something that can be seen with the eyes, and for my eyes I speak.
+If they had a voice they would speak better than I, but probably in
+the same sense.
+
+No painter has surpassed Raphael in the beauty of the figures which
+his divine pencil produced; but if this great painter had been asked
+what beauty was, he would probably have replied that he could not
+say, that he knew it by heart, and that he thought he had reproduced
+it whenever he had seen it, but that he did not know in what it
+consisted.
+
+"That face pleases me," he would say, "it is therefore beautiful!"
+
+He ought to have thanked God for having given him such an exquisite
+eye for the beautiful; but 'omne pulchrum difficile'.
+
+The painters of high renown, all those whose works proclaim genius,
+have excelled in the delineation of the beautiful; but how small is
+their number compared to the vast craved who have strained every
+nerve to depict beauty and have only left us mediocrity!
+
+If a painter could be dispensed from making his works beautiful,
+every man might be an artist; for nothing is easier than to fashion
+ugliness, and brush and canvas would be as easy to handle as mortar
+and trowel.
+
+Although portrait-painting is the most important branch of the art,
+it is to be noted that those who have succeeded in this line are very
+few.  There are three kinds of portraits: ugly likenesses, perfect
+likenesses, and those which to a perfect likeness add an almost
+imperceptible character of beauty.  The first class is worthy only of
+contempt and their authors of stoning, for to want of taste and
+talent they add impertinence, and yet never seem to see their
+failings.  The second class cannot be denied to possess real merit;
+but the palm belongs to the third, which, unfortunately, are seldom
+found, and whose authors deserve the large fortunes they amass.  Such
+was the famous Notier, whom I knew in Paris in the year 1750.  This
+great artist was then eighty, and in spite of his great age his
+talents seemed in all their freshness.  He painted a plain woman; it
+was a speaking likeness, and in spite of that those who only saw the
+portrait pronounced her to be a handsome woman.  Nevertheless, the
+most minute examination would not have revealed any faithlessness to
+the original, but some imperceptible touches gave a real but
+indefinite air of beauty to the whole.  Whence does that magic art
+take its source?   One day, when he had been painting the plain-
+looking "Mesdames de France," who on the canvas looked like two
+Aspasias, I asked him the above question.  He answered:--
+
+"It is a magic which the god of taste distils from my brains through
+my brushes.  It is the divinity of Beauty whom all the world adores,
+and which no one can define, since no one knows of what it consists.
+That canvas shews you what a delicate shade there is between beauty
+and ugliness; and nevertheless this shade seems an enormous
+difference to those unacquainted with art."
+
+The Greek painters made Venus, the goddess of beauty, squint-eyed,
+and this odd idea has been praised by some; but these painters were
+certainly in the wrong.
+
+Two squinting eyes might be beautiful, but certainly not so beautiful
+as if they did not squint, for whatever beauty they had could not
+proceed from their deformity.
+
+After this long digression, with which the reader may not be very
+well pleased, it is time for me to return to my sweetheart.  The
+tenth day of my visit to Lausanne, I went to sup and sleep with my
+mistress, and that night was the happiest I remember.  In the
+morning, while we were taking coffee with her mother, I observed that
+we seemed in no hurry to part.  At this, the mother, a woman of few
+words, took up the discourse in a polite and dignified manner, and
+told me it was my duty to undeceive Lebel before I left; and at the
+same time she gave me a letter she had had from him the evening
+before.  The worthy man begged her to remind me that if I could not
+make up my mind to separate from her daughter before I left Lausanne,
+it would be much more difficult for me to do so when I was farther
+off; above all, if, as would probably be the case, she gave me a
+living pledge of her love.  He said that he had no thoughts of
+drawing back from his word, but he should wish to be able to say that
+he had taken his wife from her mother's hands.
+
+When I had read the letter aloud, the worthy mother wept, and left us
+alone.  A moment's silence ensued, and with a sigh that shewed what
+it cost her, my dear Dubois had the courage to tell me that I must
+instantly write to Lebel to give up all pretensions to her, or to
+come and take her at once.
+
+"If I write and tell him to think no more of you, I must marry you
+myself."
+
+"No."
+
+With this no she arose and left me.  I thought it over for a quarter
+of an hour, I weighed the pros and cons and still my love shrank from
+the sacrifice.  At last, on consideration that my housekeeper would
+never have such a chance again, that I was not sure that I could
+always make her happy, I resolved to be generous, and determined to
+write to Lebel that Madame Dubois had decided of her own free will to
+become his wife, that I had no right to oppose her resolution, and
+that I would go so far as to congratulate him on a happiness I envied
+him.  I begged him to leave Soleure at once and come and receive her
+in my presence from the hands of her worthy mother.
+
+I signed the letter and took it to my housekeeper, who was in her
+mother's room.  "Take this letter, dearest, and read it, and if you
+approve its contents put your signature beside mine."  She read it
+several times, while her good mother wept, and then, with an
+affectionate and sorrowful air, she took the pen and signed.  I
+begged her mother to find somebody to take the letter to Soleure
+immediately, before my resolution was weakened by repentance.
+
+The messenger came, and as soon as he had gone, "Farewell," said I,
+embracing her, with my eyes wet with tears, "farewell, we shall see
+each other again as soon as Lebel comes."
+
+I went to my inn, a prey to the deepest grief.  This sacrifice had
+given a new impetus to my love for this charming woman, and I felt a
+sort of spasm, which made me afraid I should get ill.  I shut myself
+up in my room, and I ordered the servants to say I was unwell and
+could see no one.
+
+In the evening of the fourth day after, Lebe1 was announced.  He
+embraced me, saying his happiness would be due to me.  He then left
+me, telling me he would expect me at the house of his future bride.
+
+"Excuse me to-day, my dear fellow," said I, "but I will dine with you
+there to-morrow."
+
+When he had left me, I told Le Duc to make all preparations for our
+leaving the next day after dinner.
+
+I went out early on the following day to take leave of everybody, and
+at noon Lebel came to take me to that sad repast, at which, however,
+I was not so sad as I had feared.
+
+As I was leaving I begged the future Madame Lebel to return me the
+ring I had given her, and as we had agreed, I presented her with a
+roll of a hundred Louis, which she took with a melancholy air.
+
+"I should never have sold it," she said, "for I have no need of
+money."
+
+"In that case I will give it back to you, but promise me never to
+part with it, and keep the hundred Louis as some small reward of the
+services you have rendered me."
+
+She shook my hand affectionately, put on my finger her wedding ring,
+and left me to hide her grief.  I wiped my tears away, and said to
+Lebel,
+
+"You are about to possess yourself of a treasure which I cannot
+commend too highly.  You are a man of honour; you will appreciate her
+excellent qualities, and you will know how to make her happy.  She
+will love you only, take care of your household, and keep no secrets
+from you.  She is full of wit and spirits, and will easily disperse
+the slightest shadow of ill humour which may fall on you."
+
+I went in with him to the mother's room to take leave of her, and
+Madame Dubois begged me to delay my departure and sup once more with
+her.  I told her that my horses were put in and the carriage waiting
+at my door, and that such a delay would set tongues talking; but that
+if she liked, she, her future husband and her mother, could come and
+see me at an inn two leagues off on the Geneva road, where we could
+stay as long as we liked.  Lebel approved of the plan, and my
+proposition was accepted.
+
+When I got back to my inn I found my carriage ready, and I got in and
+drove to the meeting-place, and ordered a good supper for four, and
+an hour later my guests arrived.
+
+The gay and even happy air of the newly betrothed surprised me, but
+what astonished me more was the easy way with which she threw herself
+into my arms as soon as she saw me.  It put me quite out of
+countenance, but she had more wit than I.  However, I mustered up
+sufficient strength to follow her cue, but I could not help thinking
+that if she had really loved me she would not have found it possible
+to pass thus from love to mere friendship.  However, I imitated her,
+and made no objections to those marks of affection allowed to
+friendship, which are supposed to have no tincture of love in them.
+
+At supper I thought I saw that Lebel was more delighted at having
+such a wife than at the prospect of enjoying her and satisfying a
+strong passion.  That calmed me; I could not be jealous of a man like
+that.  I perceived, too, that my sweetheart's high spirits were more
+feigned than real; she wished to make me share them so as to render
+our separation less bitter, and to tranquillise her future husband as
+to the nature of our feelings for one another.  And when reason and
+time had quieted the tempest in my heart, I could not help thinking
+it very natural that she should be pleased at the prospect of being
+independent, and of enjoying a fortune.
+
+We made an excellent supper, which we washed down so well that at
+last the gaiety which had been simulated ended by being real.  I
+looked at the charming Dubois with pleasure; I regarded her as a
+treasure which had belonged to me, and which after making me happy
+was with my full consent about to ensure the happiness of another.
+It seemed to me that I had been magnanimous enough to give her the
+reward she deserved, like a good Mussulman who gives a favourite
+slave his freedom in return for his fidelity.  Her sallies made me
+laugh and recalled the happy moments I had passed with her, but the
+idea of her happiness prevented my regretting having yielded my
+rights to another.
+
+As Lebel was obliged to return to Lausanne in order to get back to
+Soleure in two days, we had to part.  I embraced him and asked him to
+continue his friendship towards me, and he promised with great
+effusion to be my friend till death.  As we were going down the
+stair, my charming friend said, with great candour,
+
+"I am not really gay, but I oblige myself to appear so.  I shall not
+be happy till the scar on my heart has healed.  Lebel can only claim
+my esteem, but I shall be his alone though my love be all for you.
+When we see each other again, as from what you say I hope we shall,
+we shall be able to meet as true friends, and perhaps we shall
+congratulate each other on the wise part we have taken.  As for you,
+though I do not think you will forget me, I am sure that before long
+some more or less worthy object will replace me and banish your
+sorrow.  I hope it will be so.  Be happy.  I may be with child; and
+if it prove to be so, you shall have no cause to complain of my care
+of your child, which you shall take away when you please.  We made an
+agreement on this point yesterday.  We arranged that the marriage
+should not be consummated for two months; thus we shall be certain
+whether the child belongs to you or no, and we will let people think
+that it is the legitimate offspring of our marriage.  Lebel conceived
+this plan that he might have his mind at rest on the supposed force
+of blood, in which he declares he believes no more than I do.  He has
+promised to love the child as if he were its father.  If you write to
+me, I will keep you acquainted with everything; and if I have the
+happiness to give you a child, it will be much dearer to me than your
+ring."
+
+We wept, and Lebel laughed to see us.
+
+I could only reply by pressing her to my breast, and then I gave her
+over to her future husband, who told me as he got into the carriage
+that our long talk had pleased him very much.
+
+I went to bed sadly enough.  Next morning when I awoke, a pastor of
+the Church of Geneva carne to ask me to give him a place in my
+carriage.  I agreed, and was not sorry I had done so.
+
+This priest was an eloquent man, although a theologian, who answered
+the most difficult religious questions I could put to him.  There was
+no mystery with him, everything was reason.  I have never found a
+more compliant Christianity than that of this worthy man, whose
+morals, as I heard afterwards at Geneva, were perfectly pure.  But I
+found out that this kind of Christianity was not peculiar to him, all
+his fellow-Calvinists thought in the same way.
+
+Wishing to convince him that he was a Calvinist in name only, since
+he did not believe that Jesus Christ was of the same substance as the
+Father, he replied that Calvin was only infallible where he spoke 'ex
+cathedra', but I struck him dumb by quoting the words of the Gospel.
+He blushed when I reproached him with Calvin's belief that the Pope
+was the Antichrist of the Apocalypse.
+
+"It will be impossible to destroy this prejudice at Geneva," said he,
+"till the Government orders the effacement of an inscription on the
+church door which everybody reads, and which speaks of the head of
+the Roman Church in this manner."
+
+"The people," he added, "are wholly ignorant; but I have a niece of
+twenty, who does not belong to the people in this way.  I shall have
+the honour of making you known to her; she is a theologian, and
+pretty as well."
+
+"I shall be delighted to see her, but God preserve me from arguing
+with her!"
+
+"She will make you argue, and I can assure you that it will be a
+pleasure for you!"
+
+"We shall see; but will you give me your address?"
+
+"No sir, but I shall have the honour of conducting you to your inn
+and acting as your guide."
+
+I got down at Balances, and was well lodged.  It was the 20th of
+August, 1760.  On going to the window I noticed a pane of glass on
+which I read these words, written with the point of a diamond: "You
+will forget Henriette."  In a moment my thoughts flew back to the
+time in which Henriette had written these words, thirteen years ago,
+and my hair stood on end.  We had been lodged in this room when she
+separated from me to return to France.  I was overwhelmed, and fell
+on a chair where I abandoned myself to deep thought.  Noble
+Henriette, dear Henriette, whom I had loved so well; where was she
+now?   I had never heard of her; I had never asked anyone about her.
+Comparing my present and past estates, I was obliged to confess that
+I was less worthy of possessing her now than then.  I could still
+love, but I was no longer so delicate in my thoughts; I had not those
+feelings which justify the faults committed by the senses, nor that
+probity which serves as a contrast to the follies and frailties of
+man; but, what was worst of all, I was not so strong.  Nevertheless,
+it seemed that the remembrance of Henriette restored me to my
+pristine vigour.  I had no longer my housekeeper; I experienced a
+great void; and I felt so enthusiastic that if I had known where
+Henriette was I should have gone to seek her out, despite her
+prohibition.
+
+Next day, at an early hour, I went to the banker Tronchin, who had
+all my money.  After seeing my account, he gave me a letter of credit
+on Marseilles, Genoa, Florence and Rome, and I only took twelve
+thousand francs in cash.  I had only fifty thousand crowns, three
+hundred francs, but that would take me a good way.  As soon as I had
+delivered my letters, I returned to Balances, impatient to see M. de
+Voltaire.
+
+I found my fellow-traveller in my room.  He asked me to dinner,
+telling me that I should have M. Vilars-Chandieu, who would take me
+after dinner to M. de Voltaire, who had been expecting me for several
+days.  I followed the worthy man, and found at his house excellent
+company, and the young theologian whom the uncle did not address till
+dessert.
+
+I will endeavour to report as faithfully as possible the young
+woman's conversation.
+
+"What have you been doing this morning, my dear niece?"
+
+"I have been reading St. Augustine, whom I thought absurd, and I
+think I can refute him very shortly."
+
+"On what point?"
+
+"Concerning the mother of the Saviour."
+
+"What does St. Augustine say?"
+
+"You have no doubt remarked the passage, uncle.  He says that the
+Virgin Mary conceived Jesus Christ through the ears."
+
+"You do not believe that?"
+
+"Certainly not, and for three good reasons.  In the first place
+because God, being immaterial, had no need of a hole to go in or come
+out by; in the second place, because the ear has no connection with
+the womb; and in the third place, because Mary, if she had conceived
+by the ear, would have given birth by the same channel.  This would
+do well enough for the Catholics," said she, giving me a glance, "as
+then they would be reasonable in calling her a virgin before her
+conception, during her pregnancy, and after she had given birth to
+the child."
+
+I was extremely astonished, and my astonishment was shared by the
+other guests.  Divine theology rises above all fleshly
+considerations, and after what we had heard we had either to allow
+her this privilege, or to consider the young theologian as a woman
+without shame.  The learned niece did not seem to care what we
+thought, as she asked for my opinion on the matter.
+
+"If I were a theologian and allowed myself an exact examination into
+the miracles, it is possible I should be of your opinion; but as this
+is by no means the case, I must limit myself to condemning St.
+Augustine for having analysed the mystery of the Annunciation.  I may
+say, however, that if the Virgin had been deaf, St. Augustine would
+have been guilty of a manifest absurdity, since the Incarnation would
+have been an impossibility, as in that case the nerves of the ear
+would have had no sort of communication with the womb, and the
+process would have been inconceivable; but the Incarnation is a
+miracle."
+
+She replied with great politeness that I had shown myself a greater
+theologian than she, and her uncle thanked me for having given her a
+lesson.  He made her discuss various subjects, but she did not shine.
+Her only subject was the New Testament.  I shall have occasion to
+speak of this young woman when I get back to Geneva.
+
+After dinner we went to see Voltaire, who was just leaving the table
+as we came in.  He was in the middle of a court of gentlemen and
+ladies, which made my introduction a solemn one; but with this great
+man solemnity could not fail to be in my favour.
+
+
+
+End of this Project Gutenberg Etext of MEMOIRES OF JACQUES CASANOVA
+THE ETERNAL QUEST, Vol. 3d, SWITZERLAND
+by Jacques Casanova de Seingalt