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diff --git a/2052-h/2052-h.htm b/2052-h/2052-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..9c680ff --- /dev/null +++ b/2052-h/2052-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,1088 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html + PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" + "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> +<html> +<head> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=US-ASCII" /> +<title>Everybody's Business is Nobody's Business</title> + <style type="text/css"> +/*<![CDATA[ XML blockout */ +<!-- + P { margin-top: .75em; + margin-bottom: .75em; + } + H1, H2 { + text-align: center; + margin-top: 2em; + margin-bottom: 2em; + } + H3, H4 { + text-align: left; + margin-top: 1em; + margin-bottom: 1em; + } + BODY{margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; + } + .blkquot {margin-left: 4em; margin-right: 4em;} /* block indent */ + // --> + /* XML end ]]>*/ + </style> +</head> +<body> +<h2> +<a href="#startoftext">Everybody's Business is Nobody's Business, by Daniel Defoe</a> +</h2> +<pre> +The Project Gutenberg eBook, Everybody's Business is Nobody's Business, by +Daniel Defoe + + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + + + + +Title: Everybody's Business is Nobody's Business + + +Author: Daniel Defoe + +Release Date: April 20, 2005 [eBook #2052] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII) + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK EVERYBODY'S BUSINESS IS NOBODY'S +BUSINESS*** +</pre> +<p><a name="startoftext"></a></p> +<p>Transcribed from the 1889 George Bell & Sons edition by David +Price, email ccx074@coventry.ac.uk</p> +<h1>EVERYBODY’S BUSINESS IS NOBODY’S BUSINESS</h1> +<p>or,</p> +<p>PRIVATE ABUSES, PUBLIC GRIEVANCES:</p> +<p>EXEMPLIFIED</p> +<p>In the Pride, Insolence, and exorbitant Wages of our Women, Servants, +Footmen, &c.</p> +<p>WITH</p> +<p>A Proposal for Amendment of the same; as also for clearing the Streets +of those Vermin called Shoe-Cleaners, and substituting in their stead +many Thousands of industrious Poor, now ready to starve. With +divers other Hints of great Use to the Public.</p> +<p>Humbly submitted the Consideration of our Legislature, and the careful +Perusal of all Masters and Mistresses of Families.</p> +<p>BY ANDREW MORETON, Esq.</p> +<p>The Fifth Edition, with the Addition of a Preface.</p> +<p>LONDON:</p> +<p>Printed for W. MEADOWS, in Cornhill; and sold by T. WARNER, at the +Black Boy in Pater-Noster Row; A. DODD, without Temple Bar; and E. NUTT, +at the Royal Exchange. 1725.</p> +<p>Price Six Pence.]</p> +<h2>THE PREFACE</h2> +<p>Since this little book appeared in print, it has had no less than +three answers, and fresh attacks are daily expected from the powers +of Grub-street; but should threescore antagonists more arise, unless +they say more to the purpose than the forementioned, they shall not +tempt me to reply.</p> +<p>Nor shall I engage in a paper war, but leave my book to answer for +itself, having advanced nothing therein but evident truths, and incontestible +matters of fact.</p> +<p>The general objection is against my style; I do not set up for an +author, but write only to be understood, no matter how plain.</p> +<p>As my intentions are good, so have they had the good fortune to meet +with approbation from the sober and substantial part of mankind; as +for the vicious and vagabond, their ill-will is my ambition.</p> +<p>It is with uncommon satisfaction I see the magistracy begin to put +the laws against vagabonds in force with the utmost vigour, a great +many of those vermin, the japanners, having lately been taken up and +sent to the several work-houses in and about this city; and indeed high +time, for they grow every day more and more pernicious.</p> +<p>My project for putting watchmen under commissioners, will, I hope, +be put in practice; for it is scarce safe to go by water unless you +know your man.</p> +<p>As for the maid-servants, if I undervalue myself to take notice of +them, as they are pleased to say, it is because they overvalue themselves +so much they ought to be taken notice of.</p> +<p>This makes the guilty take my subject by the wrong end, but any impartial +reader may find, I write not against servants, but bad servants; not +against wages, but exorbitant wages, and am entirely of the poet’s +opinion,</p> +<blockquote><p>The good should meet with favour and applause,<br /> +The wicked be restrain’d by wholesome laws.</p> +</blockquote> +<p>The reason why I did not publish this book till the end of the last +sessions of parliament was, because I did not care to interfere with +more momentous affairs; but leave it to the consideration of that august +body during this recess, against the next sessions, when I shall exhibit +another complaint against a growing abuse, for which I doubt not but +to receive their approbation and the thanks of all honest men.</p> +<h2>EVERYBODY’S BUSINESS IS NOBODY’S BUSINESS</h2> +<p>This is a proverb so common in everybody’s mouth, that I wonder +nobody has yet thought it worth while to draw proper inferences from +it, and expose those little abuses, which, though they seem trifling, +and as it were scarce worth consideration, yet, by insensible degrees, +they may become of injurious consequence to the public; like some diseases, +whose first symptoms are only trifling disorders, but by continuance +and progression, their last periods terminate in the destruction of +the whole human fabric.</p> +<p>In contradiction therefore to this general rule, and out of sincere +love and well meaning to the public, give me leave to enumerate the +abuses insensibly crept in among us, and the inconveniences daily arising +from the insolence and intrigues of our servant-wenches, who, by their +caballing together, have made their party so considerable, that everybody +cries out against them; and yet, to verify the proverb, nobody has thought +of, or at least proposed a remedy, although such an undertaking, mean +as it seems to be, I hope will one day be thought worthy the consideration +of our king, lords, and commons.</p> +<p>Women servants are now so scarce, that from thirty and forty shillings +a year, their wages are increased of late to six, seven, nay, eight +pounds per annum, and upwards; insomuch that an ordinary tradesman cannot +well keep one; but his wife, who might be useful in his shop or business, +must do the drudgery of household affairs; and all this because our +servant-wenches are so puffed up with pride nowadays, that they never +think they go fine enough: it is a hard matter to know the mistress +from the maid by their dress; nay, very often the maid shall be much +the finer of the two. Our woollen manufacture suffers much by +this, for nothing but silks and satins will go down with our kitchen-wenches; +to support which intolerable pride, they have insensibly raised their +wages to such a height as was never known in any age or nation but this.</p> +<p>Let us trace this from the beginning, and suppose a person has a +servant-maid sent him out of the country, at fifty shillings, or three +pounds a year. The girl has scarce been a week, nay, a day in +her service, but a committee of servant-wenches are appointed to examine +her, who advise her to raise her wages, or give warning; to encourage +her to which, the herb-woman, or chandler-woman, or some other old intelligencer, +provides her a place of four or five pounds a year; this sets madam +cock-a-hoop, and she thinks of nothing now but vails and high wages, +and so gives warning from place to place, till she has got her wages +up to the tip-top.</p> +<p>Her neat’s leathern shoes are now transformed into laced ones +with high heels; her yarn stockings are turned into fine woollen ones, +with silk clocks; and her high wooden pattens are kicked away for leathern +clogs; she must have a hoop too, as well as her mistress; and her poor +scanty linsey-woolsey petticoat is changed into a good silk one, for +four or five yards wide at the least. Not to carry the description +farther, in short, plain country Joan is now turned into a fine London +madam, can drink tea, take snuff, and carry herself as high as the best.</p> +<p>If she be tolerably handsome, and has any share of cunning, the apprentice +or her master’s son is enticed away and ruined by her. Thus +many good families are impoverished and disgraced by these pert sluts, +who, taking the advantage of a young man’s simplicity and unruly +desires, draw many heedless youths, nay, some of good estates, into +their snares; and of this we have but too many instances.</p> +<p>Some more artful shall conceal their condition, and palm themselves +off on young fellows for gentlewomen and great fortunes. How many +families have been ruined by these ladies? when the father or master +of the family, preferring the flirting airs of a young prinked up strumpet, +to the artless sincerity of a plain, grave, and good wife, has given +his desires aloose, and destroyed soul, body, family, and estate. +But they are very favourable if they wheedle nobody into matrimony, +but only make a present of a small live creature, no bigger than a bastard, +to some of the family, no matter who gets it; when a child is born it +must be kept.</p> +<p>Our sessions’ papers of late are crowded with instances of +servant-maids robbing their places, this can be only attributed to their +devilish pride; for their whole inquiry nowadays is, how little they +shall do, how much they shall have.</p> +<p>But all this while they make so little reserve, that if they fall +sick the parish must keep them, if they are out of place, they must +prostitute their bodies, or starve; so that from clopping and changing, +they generally proceed to whoring and thieving, and this is the reason +why our streets swarm with strumpets.</p> +<p>Thus many of them rove from place to place, from bawdy-house to service, +and from service to bawdy-house again, ever unsettled and never easy, +nothing being more common than to find these creatures one week in a +good family, and the next in a brothel. This amphibious life makes +them fit for neither, for if the bawd uses them ill, away they trip +to service, and if the mistress gives them a wry word, whip they are +at a bawdy-house again, so that in effect they neither make good whores +nor good servants.</p> +<p>Those who are not thus slippery in the tail, are light of finger; +and of these the most pernicious are those who beggar you inchmeal. +If a maid is a downright thief she strips you, it once, and you know +your loss; but these retail pilferers waste you insensibly, and though +you hardly miss it, yet your substance shall decay to such a degree, +that you must have a very good bottom indeed not to feel the ill effects +of such moths in your family.</p> +<p>Tea, sugar, wine, &c., or any such trifling commodities, are +reckoned no thefts, if they do not directly take your pewter from your +shelf, or your linen from your drawers, they are very honest: What harm +is there, say they, in cribbing a little matter for a junket, a merry +bout or so? Nay, there are those that when they are sent to market +for one joint of meat, shall take up two on their master’s account, +and leave one by the way, for some of these maids are mighty charitable, +and can make a shift to maintain a small family with what they can purloin +from their masters and mistresses.</p> +<p>If you send them with ready money, they turn factors, and take threepence +or fourpence in the shilling brokerage. And here let me take notice +of one very heinous abuse, not to say petty felony, which is practised +in most of the great families about town, which is, when the tradesman +gives the house-keeper or other commanding servant a penny or twopence +in the shilling, or so much in the pound, for everything they send in, +and which, from thence, is called poundage.</p> +<p>This, in my opinion, is the greatest of villanies, and ought to incur +some punishment, yet nothing is more common, and our topping tradesmen, +who seem otherwise to stand mightily on their credit, make this but +a matter of course and custom. If I do not, says one, another +will (for the servant is sure to pick a hole in the person’s coat +who shall not pay contribution). Thus this wicked practice is +carried on and winked at, while receiving of stolen goods, and confederating +with felons, which is not a jot worse, is so openly cried out against, +and severely punished, witness Jonathan Wild.</p> +<p>And yet if a master or mistress inquire after anything missing, they +must be sure to place their words in due form, or madam huffs and flings +about at a strange rate, What, would you make a thief of her? +Who would live with such mistrustful folks? Thus you are obliged +to hold your tongue, and sit down quietly by your loss, for fear of +offending your maid, forsooth!</p> +<p>Again, if your maid shall maintain one, two, or more persons from +your table, whether they are her poor relations, countryfolk, servants +out of place, shoe-cleaners, charwomen, porters, or any other of her +menial servants, who do her ladyship’s drudgery and go of her +errands, you must not complain at your expense, or ask what has become +of such a thing, or such a thing; although it might never so reasonably +be supposed that it was altogether impossible to have so much expended +in your family; but hold your tongue for peace sake, or madam will say, +You grudge her victuals; and expose you to the last degree all over +the neighbourhood.</p> +<p>Thus have they a salve for every sore, cheat you to your face, and +insult you into the bargain; nor can you help yourself without exposing +yourself, or putting yourself into a passion.</p> +<p>Another great abuse crept in among us, is the giving of veils to +servants; this was intended originally as an encouragement to such as +were willing and handy, but by custom and corruption it is now grown +to be a thorn in our sides, and, like other good things, abused, does +more harm than good; for now they make it a perquisite, a material part +of their wages, nor must their master give a supper, but the maid expects +the guests should pay for it, nay, sometimes through the nose. +Thus have they spirited people up to this unnecessary and burthensome +piece of generosity unknown to our forefathers, who only gave gifts +to servants at Christmas-tide, which custom is yet kept into the bargain; +insomuch that a maid shall have eight pounds per annum in a gentleman’s +or merchant’s family. And if her master is a man of free +spirit, who receives much company, she very often doubles her wages +by her veils; thus having meat, drink, washing, and lodging for her +labour, she throws her whole income upon her back, and by this means +looks more like the mistress of the family than the servant-wench.</p> +<p>And now we have mentioned washing, I would ask some good housewifely +gentlewoman, if servant-maids wearing printed linens, cottons, and other +things of that nature, which require frequent washing, do not, by enhancing +the article of soap, add more to housekeeping than the generality of +people would imagine? And yet these wretches cry out against great +washes, when their own unnecessary dabs are very often the occasion.</p> +<p>But the greatest abuse of all is, that these creatures are become +their own lawgivers; nay, I think they are ours too, though nobody would +imagine that such a set of slatterns should bamboozle a whole nation; +but it is neither better nor worse, they hire themselves to you by their +own rule.</p> +<p>That is, a month’s wages, or a month’s warning; if they +don’t like you they will go away the next day, help yourself how +you can; if you don’t like them, you must give them a month’s +wages to get rid of them.</p> +<p>This custom of warning, as practised by our maid-servants, is now +become a great inconvenience to masters and mistresses. You must +carry your dish very upright, or miss, forsooth, gives you warning, +and you are either left destitute, or to seek for a servant; so that, +generally speaking, you are seldom or never fixed, but always at the +mercy of every new comer to divulge your family affairs, to inspect +your private life, and treasure up the sayings of yourself and friends. +A very great confinement, and much complained of in most families.</p> +<p>Thus have these wenches, by their continual plotting and cabals, +united themselves into a formidable body, and got the whip hand of their +betters; they make their own terms with us; and two servants now, will +scarce undertake the work which one might perform with ease; notwithstanding +which, they have raised their wages to a most exorbitant pitch; and, +I doubt not, if there be not a stop put to their career, but they will +bring wages up to 201. per annum in time, for they are much about half +way already.</p> +<p>It is by these means they run away with a great part of our money, +which might be better employed in trade, and what is worse, by their +insolent behaviour, their pride in dress, and their exorbitant wages, +they give birth to the following inconveniences.</p> +<p>First, They set an ill example to our children, our apprentices, +our covenant servants, and other dependants, by their saucy and insolent +behaviour, their pert, and sometimes abusive answers, their daring defiance +of correction, and many other insolences which youth are but too apt +to imitate.</p> +<p>Secondly, By their extravagance in dress, they put our wives and +daughters upon yet greater excesses, because they will, as indeed they +ought, go finer than the maid; thus the maid striving to outdo the mistress, +the tradesman’s wife to outdo the gentleman’s wife, the +gentleman’s wife emulating the lady, and the ladies one another; +it seems as if the whole business of the female sex were nothing but +an excess of pride, and extravagance in dress.</p> +<p>Thirdly, The great height to which women-servants have brought their +wages, makes a mutiny among the men-servants, and puts them upon raising +their wages too; so that in a little time our servants will become our +partners; nay, probably, run away with the better part of our profits, +and make servants of us <i>vice versa</i>. But yet with all these +inconveniences, we cannot possibly do without these creatures; let us +therefore cease to talk of the abuses arising from them, and begin to +think of redressing them. I do not set up for a lawgiver, and +therefore shall lay down no certain rules, humbly submitting in all +things to the wisdom of our legislature. What I offer shall be +under correction; and upon conjecture, my utmost ambition being but +to give some hints to remedy this growing evil, and leave the prosecution +to abler hands.</p> +<p>And first it would be necessary to settle and limit their wages, +from forty and fifty shillings to four and five pounds per annum, that +is to say, according to their merits and capacities; for example, a +young unexperienced servant should have forty shillings per annum, till +she qualifies herself for a larger sum; a servant who can do all household +work, or, as the good women term it, can take her work and leave her +work, should have four pounds per annum; and those who have lived seven +years in one service, should ever after demand five pounds per annum, +for I would very fain have some particular encouragements and privileges +given to such servants who should continue long in a place; it would +incite a desire to please, and cause an emulation very beneficial to +the public.</p> +<p>I have heard of an ancient charity in the parish of St. Clement’s +Danes, where a sum of money, or estate, is left, out of the interest +or income of which such maid-servants, who have lived in that parish +seven years in one service, receive a reward of ten pounds apiece, if +they please to demand it.</p> +<p>This is a noble benefaction, and shows the public spirit of the donor; +but everybody’s business is nobody’s; nor have I heard that +such reward has been paid to any servant of late years. A thousand +pities a gift of that nature should sink into oblivion, and not be kept +up as an example to incite all parishes to do the like.</p> +<p>The Romans had a law called <i>Jus Trium Liberorum</i>, by which +every man who had been a father of three children, had particular honours +and privileges. This incited the youth to quit a dissolute single +life and become fathers of families, to the support and glory of the +empire.</p> +<p>In imitation of this most excellent law, I would have such servants, +who should continue many years in one service, meet with singular esteem +and reward.</p> +<p>The apparel of our women-servants should be next regulated, that +we may know the mistress from the maid. I remember I was once +put very much to the blush, being at a friend’s house, and by +him required to salute the ladies, I kissed the chamber-jade into the +bargain, for she was as well dressed as the best. But I was soon +undeceived by a general titter, which gave me the utmost confusion; +nor can I believe myself the only person who has made such a mistake.</p> +<p>Things of this nature would be easily avoided, if servant-maids were +to wear liveries, as our footmen do; or obliged to go in a dress suitable +to their station. What should ail them, but a jacket and petticoat +of good yard-wide stuff, or calimanco, might keep them decent and warm.</p> +<p>Our charity children are distinguished by their dress, why then may +not our women-servants? why may they not be made frugal per force, and +not suffered to put all on their backs, but obliged to save something +against a rainy day? I am, therefore, entirely against servants +wearing of silks, laces, and other superfluous finery; it sets them +above themselves, and makes their mistresses contemptible in their eyes. +I am handsomer than my mistress, says a young prinked up baggage, what +pity it is I should be her servant, I go as well dressed, or better +than she. This makes the girl take the first offer to be made +a whore, and there is a good servant spoiled; whereas, were her dress +suitable to her condition, it would teach her humility, and put her +in mind of her duty.</p> +<p>Besides the fear of spoiling their clothes makes them afraid of household-work; +so that in a little time we shall have none but chambermaids and nurserymaids; +and of this let me give one instance; my family is composed of myself +and sister, a man and a maid; and, being without the last, a young wench +came to hire herself. The man was gone out, and my sister above +stairs, so I opened the door myself; and this person presented herself +to my view, dressed completely, more like a visitor than a servant-maid; +she, not knowing me, asked for my sister; pray, madam, said I, be pleased +to walk into the parlour, she shall wait on you presently. Accordingly +I handed madam in, who took it very cordially. After some apology, +I left her alone for a minute or two; while I, stupid wretch! ran up +to my sister, and told her there was a gentlewoman below come to visit +her. Dear brother, said she, don’t leave her alone, go down +and entertain her while I dress myself. Accordingly, down I went, +and talked of indifferent affairs; meanwhile my sister dressed herself +all over again, not being willing to be seen in an undress. At +last she came down dressed as clean as her visitor; but how great was +my surprise when I found my fine lady a common servant-wench.</p> +<p>My sister understanding what she was, began to inquire what wages +she expected? She modestly asked but eight pounds a year. +The next question was, what work she could do to deserve such wages? +to which she answered, she could clean a house, or dress a common family +dinner. But cannot you wash, replied my sister, or get up linen? +she answered in the negative, and said, she would undertake neither, +nor would she go into a family that did not put out their linen to wash, +and hire a charwoman to scour. She desired to see the house, and +having carefully surveyed it, said, the work was too hard for her, nor +could she undertake it. This put my sister beyond all patience, +and me into the greatest admiration. Young woman, said she, you +have made a mistake, I want a housemaid, and you are a chambermaid. +No, madam, replied she, I am not needlewoman enough for that. +And yet you ask eight pounds a year, replied my sister. Yes, madam, +said she, nor shall I bate a farthing. Then get you gone for a +lazy impudent baggage, said I, you want to be a boarder not a servant; +have you a fortune or estate that you dress at that rate? No, +sir, said she, but I hope I may wear what I work for without offence. +What you work, interrupted my sister, why you do not seem willing to +undertake any work; you will not wash nor scour; you cannot dress a +dinner for company; you are no needlewoman; and our little house of +two rooms on a floor, is too much for you. For God’s sake +what can you do? Madam, replied she pertly; I know my business; +and do not fear a service; there are more places than parish churches; +if you wash at home, you should have a laundrymaid; if you give entertainments, +you must have a cookmaid; if you have any needlework, you should have +a chambermaid; and such a house as this is enough for a housemaid in +all conscience.</p> +<p>I was pleased at the wit, and astonished at the impudence of the +girl, so dismissed her with thanks for her instructions, assuring her +that when I kept four maids she should be housemaid if she pleased.</p> +<p>Were a servant to do my business with cheerfulness, I should not +grudge at five or six pounds per annum; nor would I be so unchristian +to put more upon any one than they can bear; but to pray and pay too +is the devil. It is very hard, that I must keep four servants +or none.</p> +<p>In great families, indeed, where many servants are required, those +distinctions of chambermaid, housemaid, cookmaid, laundrymaid, nurserymaid, +&c., are requisite, to the end that each may take her particular +business, and many hands may make the work light; but for a private +gentleman, of a small fortune, to be obliged to keep so many idle jades, +when one might do the business, is intolerable, and matter of great +grievance.</p> +<p>I cannot close this discourse without a gentle admonition and reproof +to some of my own sex, I mean those gentlemen who give themselves unnecessary +airs, and cannot go to see a friend, but they must kiss and slop the +maid; and all this is done with an air of gallantry, and must not be +resented. Nay, some gentlemen are so silly, that they shall carry +on an underhand affair with their friend’s servant-maid, to their +own disgrace, and the ruin of many a young creature. Nothing is +more base and ungenerous, yet nothing more common, and withal so little +taken notice of. D-n me, Jack, says one friend to another, this +maid of yours is a pretty girl, you do so and so to her, by G-d. +This makes the creature pert, vain, and impudent, and spoils many a +good servant.</p> +<p>What gentleman will descend to this low way of intrigue, when he +shall consider that he has a footboy or an apprentice for his rival, +and that he is seldom or never admitted, but when they have been his +tasters; and the fool of fortune, though he comes at the latter end +of the feast, yet pays the whole reckoning; and so indeed would I have +all such silly cullies served.</p> +<p>If I must have an intrigue, let it be with a woman that shall not +shame me. I would never go into the kitchen, when the parlour +door was open. We are forbidden at Highgate, to kiss the maid +when we may kiss the mistress; why then will gentlemen descend so low, +by too much familiarity with these creatures, to bring themselves into +contempt?</p> +<p>I have been at places where the maid has been so dizzied with these +idle compliments that she has mistook one thing for another, and not +regarded her mistress in the least; but put on all the flirting airs +imaginable. This behaviour is nowhere so much complained of as +in taverns, coffeehouses, and places of public resort, where there are +handsome bar-keepers, &c. These creatures being puffed up +with the fulsome flattery of a set of flesh-flies, which are continually +buzzing about them, carry themselves with the utmost insolence imaginable; +insomuch, that you must speak to them with a great deal of deference, +or you are sure to be affronted. Being at a coffeehouse the other +day, where one of these ladies kept the bar, I had bespoke a dish of +rice tea; but madam was so taken up with her sparks, she had quite forgot +it. I spake for it again, and with some temper, but was answered +after a most taunting manner, not without a toss of the head, a contraction +of the nostrils, and other impertinences, too many to enumerate. +Seeing myself thus publicly insulted by such an animal, I could not +choose but show my resentment. Woman, said I, sternly, I want +a dish of rice tea, and not what your vanity and impudence may imagine; +therefore treat me as a gentleman and a customer, and serve me with +what I call for: keep your impertinent repartees and impudent behaviour +for the coxcombs that swarm round your bar, and make you so vain of +your blown carcase. And indeed I believe the insolence of this +creature will ruin her master at last, by driving away men of sobriety +and business, and making the place a den of vagabonds and rakehells.</p> +<p>Gentlemen, therefore, ought to be very circumspect in their behaviour, +and not undervalue themselves to servant-wenches, who are but too apt +to treat a gentleman ill whenever he puts himself into their power.</p> +<p>Let me now beg pardon for this digression, and return to my subject +by proposing some practicable methods for regulating of servants, which, +whether they are followed or not, yet, if they afford matter of improvement +and speculation, will answer the height of my expectation, and I will +be the first who shall approve of whatever improvements are made from +this small beginning.</p> +<p>The first abuse I would have reformed is, that servants should be +restrained from throwing themselves out of place on every idle vagary. +This might be remedied were all contracts between master and servant +made before a justice of peace, or other proper officer, and a memorandum +thereof taken in writing. Nor should such servant leave his or +her place (for men and maids might come under the same regulation) till +the time agreed on be expired, unless such servant be misused or denied +necessaries, or show some other reasonable cause for their discharge. +In that case, the master or mistress should be reprimanded or fined. +But if servants misbehave themselves, or leave their places, not being +regularly discharged, they ought to be amerced or punished. But +all those idle, ridiculous customs, and laws of their own making, as +a month’s wages, or a month’s warning, and suchlike, should +be entirely set aside and abolished.</p> +<p>When a servant has served the limited time duly and faithfully, they +should be entitled to a certificate, as is practised at present in the +wool-combing trade; nor should any person hire a servant without a certificate +or other proper security. A servant without a certificate should +be deemed a vagrant; and a master or mistress ought to assign very good +reasons indeed when they object against giving a servant his or her +certificate.</p> +<p>And though, to avoid prolixity, I have not mentioned footmen particularly +in the foregoing discourse, yet the complaints alleged against the maids +are as well masculine as feminine, and very applicable to our gentlemen’s +gentlemen; I would, therefore, have them under the very same regulations, +and, as they are fellow-servants, would not make fish of one and flesh +of the other, since daily experience teaches us, that “never a +barrel the better herring.”</p> +<p>The next great abuse among us is, that under the notion of cleaning +our shoes, above ten thousand wicked, idle, pilfering vagrants are permitted +to patrol about our city and suburbs. These are called the black-guard, +who black your honour’s shoes, and incorporate themselves under +the title of the Worshipful Company of Japanners.</p> +<p>Were this all, there were no hurt in it, and the whole might terminate +in a jest; but the mischief ends not here, they corrupt our youth, especially +our men-servants; oaths and impudence are their only flowers of rhetoric; +gaming and thieving are the principal parts of their profession; japanning +but the pretence. For example, a gentleman keeps a servant, who +among other things is to clean his master’s shoes; but our gentlemen’s +gentlemen are above it nowadays, and your man’s man performs the +office, for which piece of service you pay double and treble, especially +if you keep a table, nay, you are well off if the japanner has no more +than his own diet from it.</p> +<p>I have often observed these rascals sneaking from gentlemen’s +doors with wallets or hats’ full of good victuals, which they +either carry to their trulls, or sell for a trifle. By this means, +our butcher’s, our baker’s, our poulterer’s, and cheesemonger’s +bills are monstrously exaggerated; not to mention candles just lighted, +which sell for fivepence a pound, and many other perquisites best known +to themselves and the pilfering villains their confederates.</p> +<p>Add to this, that their continual gaming sets servants upon their +wits to supply this extravagance, though at the same time the master’s +pocket pays for it, and the time which should be spent in a gentleman’s +service is loitered away among these rakehells, insomuch that half our +messages are ineffectual, the time intended being often expired before +the message is delivered.</p> +<p>How many frequent robberies are committed by these japanners? +And to how many more are they confederates? Silver spoons, spurs, +and other small pieces of plate, are every day missing, and very often +found upon these sort of gentlemen; yet are they permitted, to the shame +of all our good laws, and the scandal of our most excellent government, +to lurk about our streets, to debauch our servants and apprentices, +and support an infinite number of scandalous, shameless trulls, yet +more wicked than themselves, for not a Jack among them but must have +his Gill.</p> +<p>By whom such indecencies are daily acted, even in our open streets, +as are very offensive to the eyes and ears of all sober persons, and +even abominable in a Christian country.</p> +<p>In any riot, or other disturbance, these sparks are always the foremost; +for most among them can turn their hands to picking of pockets, to run +away with goods from a fire, or other public confusion, to snatch anything +from a woman or child, to strip a house when the door is open, or any +other branch of a thief’s profession.</p> +<p>In short, it is a nursery for thieves and villains; modest women +are every day insulted by them and their strumpets; and such children +who run about the streets, or those servants who go on errands, do but +too frequently bring home some scraps of their beastly profane wit; +insomuch, that the conversation of our lower rank of people runs only +upon bawdy and blasphemy, notwithstanding our societies for reformation, +and our laws in force against profaneness; for this lazy life gets them +many proselytes, their numbers daily increasing from runaway apprentices +and footboys, insomuch that it is a very hard matter for a gentleman +to get him a servant, or for a tradesman to find an apprentice.</p> +<p>Innumerable other mischiefs accrue, and others will spring up from +this race of caterpillars, who must be swept from out our streets, or +we shall be overrun with all manner of wickedness.</p> +<p>But the subject is so low, it becomes disagreeable even to myself; +give me leave, therefore, to propose a way to clear the streets of these +vermin, and to substitute as many honest industrious persons in their +stead, who are now starving for want of bread, while these execrable +villains live, though in rags and nastiness, yet in plenty and luxury.</p> +<p>I, therefore, humbly propose that these vagabonds be put immediately +under the command of such taskmasters as the government shall appoint, +and that they be employed, punished, or rewarded, according to their +capacities and demerits; that is to say, the industrious and docible +to wool-combing, and other parts of the woollen manufacture, where hands +are wanted, as also to husbandry and other parts of agriculture.</p> +<p>For it is evident that there are scarce hands enow in the country +to carry on either of these affairs. Now, these vagabonds might +not only by this means be kept out of harm’s way, but be rendered +serviceable to the nation. Nor is there any need of transporting +them beyond seas, for if any are refractory they should be sent to our +stannaries and other mines, to our coal works and other places where +hard labour is required. And here I must offer one thing never +yet thought of, or proposed by any, and that is, the keeping in due +repair the navigation of the river Thames, so useful to our trade in +general; and yet of late years such vast hills of sand are gathered +together in several parts of the river, as are very prejudicial to its +navigation, one which is near London Bridge, another near Whitehall, +a third near Battersea, and a fourth near Fulham. These are of +very great hindrance to the navigation; and indeed the removal of them +ought to be a national concern, which I humbly propose may be thus effected.</p> +<p>The rebellious part of these vagabonds, as also other thieves and +offenders, should be formed into bodies under the command of proper +officers, and under the guard and awe of our soldiery. These should +every day at low water carry away these sandhills, and remove every +other obstruction to the navigation of this most excellent and useful +river.</p> +<p>It may be objected that the ballast men might do this; that as fast +as the hills are taken away they would gather together again, or that +the watermen might do it. To the first, I answer, that ballast +men, instead of taking away from these hills, make holes in other places +of the river, which is the reason so many young persons are drowned +when swimming or bathing in the river.</p> +<p>Besides, it is a work for many hands, and of long continuance; so +that ballast men do more harm than good. The second objection +is as silly; as if I should never wash myself, because I shall be dirty +again, and I think needs no other answer. And as to the third +objection, the watermen are not so public-spirited, they live only from +hand to mouth, though not one of them but finds the inconvenience of +these hills, every day being obliged to go a great way round about for +fear of running aground; insomuch that in a few years the navigation +of that part of the river will be entirely obstructed. Nevertheless, +every one of these gentlemen-watermen hopes it will last his time, and +so they all cry, The devil take the hindmost. But yet I judge +it highly necessary that this be made a national concern, like Dagenham +breach, and that these hills be removed by some means or other.</p> +<p>And now I have mentioned watermen, give me leave to complain of the +insolences and exactions they daily commit on the river Thames, and +in particular this one instance, which cries aloud for justice.</p> +<p>A young lady of distinction, in company with her brother, a little +youth, took a pair of oars at or near the Temple, on April day last, +and ordered the men to carry them to Pepper Alley Stairs. One +of the fellows, according to their usual impertinence, asked the lady +where she was going? She answered, near St. Olave’s church. +Upon which he said, she had better go through the bridge. The +lady replied she had never gone through the bridge in her life, nor +would she venture for a hundred guineas; so commanded him once more +to land her at Pepper Alley Stairs. Notwithstanding which, in +spite of her fears, threats, and commands; nay, in spite of the persuasion +of his fellow, he forced her through London Bridge, which frightened +her beyond expression. And to mend the matter, he obliged her +to pay double fare, and mobbed her into the bargain.</p> +<p>To resent which abuse, application was made to the hall, the fellow +summoned, and the lady ordered to attend, which she did, waiting there +all the morning, and was appointed to call again in the afternoon. +She came accordingly, they told her the fellow had been there, but was +gone, and that she must attend another Friday. She attended again +and again, but to the same purpose. Nor have they yet produced +the man, but tired out the lady, who has spent above ten shillings in +coach-hire, been abused and baffled into the bargain.</p> +<p>It is pity, therefore, there are not commissioners for watermen, +as there are for hackney coachmen; or that justices of the peace might +not inflict bodily penalties on watermen thus offending. But while +watermen are watermen’s judges, I shall laugh at those who carry +their complaints to the hall.</p> +<p>The usual plea in behalf of abusive watermen is, that they are drunk, +ignorant, or poor; but will that satisfy the party aggrieved, or deter +the offender from reoffending? Whereas were the offenders sent +to the house of correction, and there punished, or sentenced to work +at the sandhills aforementioned, for a time suitable to the nature of +their crimes, terror of such punishments would make them fearful of +offending, to the great quiet of the subject.</p> +<p>Now, it maybe asked, How shall we have our shoes cleaned, or how +are these industrious poor to be maintained? To this I answer +that the places of these vagabonds may be very well supplied by great +numbers of ancient persons, poor widows, and others, who have not enough +from their respective parishes to maintain them. These poor people +I would have authorised and stationed by the justices of the peace or +other magistrates. Each of these should have a particular walk +or stand, and no other shoe-cleaner should come into that walk, unless +the person misbehave and be removed. Nor should any person clean +shoes in the streets, but these authorised shoe-cleaners, who should +have some mark of distinction, and be under the immediate government +of the justices of the peace.</p> +<p>Thus would many thousands of poor people be provided for, without +burthening their parishes. Some of these may earn a shilling or +two in the day, and none less than sixpence, or thereabouts. And +lest the old japanners should appear again, in the shape of linkboys, +and knock down gentlemen in drink, or lead others out of the way into +dark remote places, where they either put out their lights, and rob +them themselves, or run away and leave them to be pillaged by others, +as is daily practised, I would have no person carry a link for hire +but some of these industrious poor, and even such, not without some +ticket or badge, to let people know whom they trust. Thus would +the streets be cleared night and day of these vermin; nor would oaths, +skirmishes, blasphemy, obscene talk, or other wicked examples, be so +public and frequent. All gaming at orange and gingerbread barrows +should be abolished, as also all penny and halfpenny lotteries, thimbles +and balls, &c., so frequent in Moorfields, Lincoln’s-inn-fields, +&c., where idle fellows resort, to play with children and apprentices, +and tempt them to steal their parents’ or master’s money.</p> +<p>There is one admirable custom in the city of London, which I could +wish were imitated in the city and liberties of Westminster, and bills +of mortality, which is, no porter can carry a burthen or letter in the +city, unless he be a ticket porter; whereas, out of the freedom part +of London, any person may take a knot and turn porter, till he be entrusted +with something of value, and then you never hear of him more.</p> +<p>This is very common, and ought to be amended. I would, therefore, +have all porters under some such regulation as coachmen, chairmen, carmen, +&c.; a man may then know whom he entrusts, and not run the risk +of losing his goods, &c. Nay, I would not have a person carry +a basket in the markets, who is not subject to some such regulation; +for very many persons oftentimes lose their dinners in sending their +meat home by persons they know nothing of.</p> +<p>Thus would all our poor be stationed, and a man or woman able to +perform any of these offices, must either comply or be termed an idle +vagrant, and sent to a place where they shall be forced to work. +By this means industry will be encouraged, idleness punished, and we +shall be famed, as well as happy for our tranquillity and decorum.</p> +<p>***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK EVERYBODY'S BUSINESS IS NOBODY'S</p> +<pre> +BUSINESS*** + + +***** This file should be named 2052-h.htm or 2052-h.zip****** + + +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: +https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/0/5/2052 + + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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