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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Contributions to All the Year Round, by
+Charles Dickens
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
+other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
+whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
+the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
+www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
+to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
+
+
+
+
+Title: Contributions to All the Year Round
+
+
+Author: Charles Dickens
+
+
+
+Release Date: August 20, 2019 [eBook #1464]
+[This file was first posted on July 16, 1998]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: UTF-8
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONTRIBUTIONS TO ALL THE YEAR
+ROUND***
+
+
+Transcribed from the 1912 Gresham Publishing Company edition (_Works of
+Charles Dickens_, _Volume_ 19) by David Price, email ccx074@pglaf.org
+
+ [Picture: Book cover]
+
+
+
+
+
+ CONTRIBUTIONS
+ TO
+ _All The Year Round_
+
+
+ BY
+ CHARLES DICKENS
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+ PAGE
+Announcement in _Household Words_ of the Approaching 475
+Publication of _All The Year Round_ (May 28, 1859)
+The Poor Man and his Beer (April 30, 1859) 477
+Five New Points of Criminal Law (September 24, 1859) 485
+Leigh Hunt: A Remonstrance (December 24, 1859) 485
+The Tattlesnivel Bleater (December 31, 1859) 487
+The Young Man from the Country (March 1, 1862) 497
+An Enlightened Clergyman (March 8, 1862) 502
+Rather a Strong Dose (March 21, 1863) 504
+The Martyr Medium (April 4, 1863) 510
+The Late Mr. Stanfield (June 1, 1867) 516
+A Slight Question of Fact (February 13, 1869) 518
+Landor’s Life (July 24, 1869) 519
+Address which Appeared Shortly previous to the Completion 526
+of the Twentieth Volume (1868) intimating a New Series of
+_All The Year Round_
+
+
+
+
+ANNOUNCEMENT IN “HOUSEHOLD WORDS” OF THE APPROACHING PUBLICATION OF “ALL
+THE YEAR ROUND”
+
+
+AFTER the appearance of the present concluding Number of _Household
+Words_, this publication will merge into the new weekly publication, _All
+the Year Round_, and the title, _Household Words_, will form a part of
+the title-page of _All the Year Round_.
+
+The Prospectus of the latter Journal describes it in these words:
+
+ “ADDRESS
+
+“Nine years of _Household Words_, are the best practical assurance that
+can be offered to the public, of the spirit and objects of _All the Year
+Round_.
+
+“In transferring myself, and my strongest energies, from the publication
+that is about to be discontinued, to the publication that is about to be
+begun, I have the happiness of taking with me the staff of writers with
+whom I have laboured, and all the literary and business co-operation that
+can make my work a pleasure. In some important respects, I am now free
+greatly to advance on past arrangements. Those, I leave to testify for
+themselves in due course.
+
+“That fusion of the graces of the imagination with the realities of life,
+which is vital to the welfare of any community, and for which I have
+striven from week to week as honestly as I could during the last nine
+years, will continue to be striven for “all the year round”. The old
+weekly cares and duties become things of the Past, merely to be assumed,
+with an increased love for them and brighter hopes springing out of them,
+in the Present and the Future.
+
+“I look, and plan, for a very much wider circle of readers, and yet again
+for a steadily expanding circle of readers, in the projects I hope to
+carry through “all the year round”. And I feel confident that this
+expectation will be realized, if it deserve realization.
+
+“The task of my new journal is set, and it will steadily try to work the
+task out. Its pages shall show to what good purpose their motto is
+remembered in them, and with how much of fidelity and earnestness they
+tell
+
+ “the story of our lives from year to year.
+
+ “CHARLES DICKENS.”
+
+Since this was issued, the Journal itself has come into existence, and
+has spoken for itself five weeks. Its fifth Number is published to-day,
+and its circulation, moderately stated, trebles that now relinquished in
+_Household Words_.
+
+In referring our readers, henceforth, to _All the Year Round_, we can but
+assure them afresh, of our unwearying and faithful service, in what is at
+once the work and the chief pleasure of our life. Through all that we
+are doing, and through all that we design to do, our aim is to do our
+best in sincerity of purpose, and true devotion of spirit.
+
+We do not for a moment suppose that we may lean on the character of these
+pages, and rest contented at the point where they stop. We see in that
+point but a starting-place for our new journey; and on that journey, with
+new prospects opening out before us everywhere, we joyfully proceed,
+entreating our readers—without any of the pain of leave-taking incidental
+to most journeys—to bear us company All the year round.
+
+_Saturday_, _May_ 28, 1859.
+
+
+
+
+THE POOR MAN AND HIS BEER
+
+
+MY friend Philosewers and I, contemplating a farm-labourer the other day,
+who was drinking his mug of beer on a settle at a roadside ale-house
+door, we fell to humming the fag-end of an old ditty, of which the poor
+man and his beer, and the sin of parting them, form the doleful burden.
+Philosewers then mentioned to me that a friend of his in an agricultural
+county—say a Hertfordshire friend—had, for two years last past,
+endeavoured to reconcile the poor man and his beer to public morality, by
+making it a point of honour between himself and the poor man that the
+latter should use his beer and not abuse it. Interested in an effort of
+so unobtrusive and unspeechifying a nature, “O Philosewers,” said I,
+after the manner of the dreary sages in Eastern apologues, “Show me, I
+pray, the man who deems that temperance can be attained without a medal,
+an oration, a banner, and a denunciation of half the world, and who has
+at once the head and heart to set about it!”
+
+Philosewers expressing, in reply, his willingness to gratify the dreary
+sage, an appointment was made for the purpose. And on the day fixed, I,
+the Dreary one, accompanied by Philosewers, went down Nor’-West per
+railway, in search of temperate temperance. It was a thunderous day; and
+the clouds were so immoderately watery, and so very much disposed to sour
+all the beer in Hertfordshire, that they seemed to have taken the pledge.
+
+But, the sun burst forth gaily in the afternoon, and gilded the old
+gables, and old mullioned windows, and old weathercock and old
+clock-face, of the quaint old house which is the dwelling of the man we
+sought. How shall I describe him? As one of the most famous practical
+chemists of the age? That designation will do as well as another—better,
+perhaps, than most others. And his name? Friar Bacon.
+
+“Though, take notice, Philosewers,” said I, behind my hand, “that the
+first Friar Bacon had not that handsome lady-wife beside him. Wherein, O
+Philosewers, he was a chemist, wretched and forlorn, compared with his
+successor. Young Romeo bade the holy father Lawrence hang up philosophy,
+unless philosophy could make a Juliet. Chemistry would infallibly be
+hanged if its life were staked on making anything half so pleasant as
+this Juliet.” The gentle Philosewers smiled assent.
+
+The foregoing whisper from myself, the Dreary one, tickled the ear of
+Philosewers, as we walked on the trim garden terrace before dinner, among
+the early leaves and blossoms; two peacocks, apparently in very tight new
+boots, occasionally crossing the gravel at a distance. The sun, shining
+through the old house-windows, now and then flashed out some brilliant
+piece of colour from bright hangings within, or upon the old oak
+panelling; similarly, Friar Bacon, as we paced to and fro, revealed
+little glimpses of his good work.
+
+“It is not much,” said he. “It is no wonderful thing. There used to be
+a great deal of drunkenness here, and I wanted to make it better if I
+could. The people are very ignorant, and have been much neglected, and I
+wanted to make _that_ better, if I could. My utmost object was, to help
+them to a little self-government and a little homely pleasure. I only
+show the way to better things, and advise them. I never act for them; I
+never interfere; above all, I never patronise.”
+
+I had said to Philosewers as we came along Nor’-West that patronage was
+one of the curses of England; I appeared to rise in the estimation of
+Philosewers when thus confirmed.
+
+“And so,” said Friar Bacon, “I established my Allotment-club, and my
+pig-clubs, and those little Concerts by the ladies of my own family, of
+which we have the last of the season this evening. They are a great
+success, for the people here are amazingly fond of music. But there is
+the early dinner-bell, and I have no need to talk of my endeavours when
+you will soon see them in their working dress”.
+
+Dinner done, behold the Friar, Philosewers, and myself the Dreary one,
+walking, at six o’clock, across the fields, to the “Club-house.”
+
+As we swung open the last field-gate and entered the Allotment-grounds,
+many members were already on their way to the Club, which stands in the
+midst of the allotments. Who could help thinking of the wonderful
+contrast between these club-men and the club-men of St. James’s Street,
+or Pall Mall, in London! Look at yonder prematurely old man, doubled up
+with work, and leaning on a rude stick more crooked than himself, slowly
+trudging to the club-house, in a shapeless hat like an Italian
+harlequin’s, or an old brown-paper bag, leathern leggings, and dull green
+smock-frock, looking as though duck-weed had accumulated on it—the result
+of its stagnant life—or as if it were a vegetable production, originally
+meant to blow into something better, but stopped somehow. Compare him
+with Old Cousin Feenix, ambling along St. James’s Street, got up in the
+style of a couple of generations ago, and with a head of hair, a
+complexion, and a set of teeth, profoundly impossible to be believed in
+by the widest stretch of human credulity. Can they both be men and
+brothers? Verily they are. And although Cousin Feenix has lived so fast
+that he will die at Baden-Baden, and although this club-man in the frock
+has lived, ever since he came to man’s estate, on nine shillings a week,
+and is sure to die in the Union if he die in bed, yet he brought as much
+into the world as Cousin Feenix, and will take as much out—more, for more
+of him is real.
+
+A pretty, simple building, the club-house, with a rustic colonnade
+outside, under which the members can sit on wet evenings, looking at the
+patches of ground they cultivate for themselves; within, a
+well-ventilated room, large and lofty, cheerful pavement of coloured
+tiles, a bar for serving out the beer, good supply of forms and chairs,
+and a brave big chimney-corner, where the fire burns cheerfully.
+Adjoining this room, another:
+
+“Built for a reading-room,” said Friar Bacon; “but not much used—yet.”
+
+The dreary sage, looking in through the window, perceiving a fixed
+reading-desk within, and inquiring its use:
+
+“I have Service there,” said Friar Bacon. “They never went anywhere to
+hear prayers, and of course it would be hopeless to help them to be
+happier and better, if they had no religious feeling at all.”
+
+“The whole place is very pretty.” Thus the sage.
+
+“I am glad you think so. I built it for the holders of the
+Allotment-grounds, and gave it them: only requiring them to manage it by
+a committee of their own appointing, and never to get drunk there. They
+never have got drunk there.”
+
+“Yet they have their beer freely?”
+
+“O yes. As much as they choose to buy. The club gets its beer direct
+from the brewer, by the barrel. So they get it good; at once much
+cheaper, and much better, than at the public-house. The members take it
+in turns to be steward, and serve out the beer: if a man should decline
+to serve when his turn came, he would pay a fine of twopence. The
+steward lasts, as long as the barrel lasts. When there is a new barrel,
+there is a new steward.”
+
+“What a noble fire is roaring up that chimney!”
+
+“Yes, a capital fire. Every member pays a halfpenny a week.”
+
+“Every member must be the holder of an Allotment-garden?”
+
+“Yes; for which he pays five shillings a year. The Allotments you see
+about us, occupy some sixteen or eighteen acres, and each garden is as
+large as experience shows one man to be able to manage. You see how
+admirably they are tilled, and how much they get off them. They are
+always working in them in their spare hours; and when a man wants a mug
+of beer, instead of going off to the village and the public-house, he
+puts down his spade or his hoe, comes to the club-house and gets it, and
+goes back to his work. When he has done work, he likes to have his beer
+at the club, still, and to sit and look at his little crops as they
+thrive.”
+
+“They seem to manage the club very well.”
+
+“Perfectly well. Here are their own rules. They made them. I never
+interfere with them, except to advise them when they ask me.”
+
+
+
+RULES AND REGULATIONS
+MADE BY THE COMMITTEE
+
+
+ From the 21st September, 1857
+
+ _One half-penny per week to be paid to the club by each member_
+
+1.—Each member to draw the beer in order, according to the number of his
+allotment; on failing, a forfeit of twopence to be paid to the club.
+
+2.—The member that draws the beer to pay for the same, and bring his
+ticket up receipted when the subscriptions are paid; on failing to do so,
+a penalty of sixpence to be forfeited and paid to the club.
+
+3.—The subscriptions and forfeits to be paid at the club-room on the last
+Saturday night of each month.
+
+4.—The subscriptions and forfeits to be cleared up every quarter; if not,
+a penalty of sixpence to be paid to the club.
+
+5.—The member that draws the beer to be at the club-room by six o’clock
+every evening, and stay till ten; but in the event of no member being
+there, he may leave at nine; on failing so to attend, a penalty of
+sixpence to be paid to the club.
+
+6.—Any member giving beer to a stranger in this club-room, excepting to
+his wife or family, shall be liable to the penalty of one shilling.
+
+7.—Any member lifting his hand to strike another in this club-room shall
+be liable to the penalty of sixpence.
+
+8.—Any member swearing in this club-room shall be liable to a penalty of
+twopence each time.
+
+9.—Any member selling beer shall be expelled from the club.
+
+10.—Any member wishing to give up his allotment, may apply to the
+committee, and they shall value the crop and the condition of the ground.
+The amount of the valuation shall be paid by the succeeding tenant, who
+shall be allowed to enter on any part of the allotment which is uncropped
+at the time of notice of the leaving tenant.
+
+11.—Any member not keeping his allotment-garden clear from seed-weeds, or
+otherwise injuring his neighbours, may be turned out of his garden by the
+votes of two-thirds of the committee, one month’s notice being given to
+him.
+
+12.—Any member carelessly breaking a mug, is to pay the cost of replacing
+the same.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+I was soliciting the attention of Philosewers to some old old bonnets
+hanging in the Allotment-gardens to frighten the birds, and the fashion
+of which I should think would terrify a French bird to death at any
+distance, when Philosewers solicited my attention to the scrapers at the
+club-house door. The amount of the soil of England which every member
+brought there on his feet, was indeed surprising; and even I, who am
+professedly a salad-eater, could have grown a salad for my dinner, in the
+earth on any member’s frock or hat.
+
+“Now,” said Friar Bacon, looking at his watch, “for the Pig-clubs!”
+
+The dreary Sage entreated explanation.
+
+“Why, a pig is so very valuable to a poor labouring man, and it is so
+very difficult for him at this time of the year to get money enough to
+buy one, that I lend him a pound for the purpose. But, I do it in this
+way. I leave such of the club members as choose it and desire it, to
+form themselves into parties of five. To every man in each company of
+five, I lend a pound, to buy a pig. But, each man of the five becomes
+bound for every other man, as to the repayment of his money.
+Consequently, they look after one another, and pick out their partners
+with care; selecting men in whom they have confidence.”
+
+“They repay the money, I suppose, when the pig is fattened, killed, and
+sold?”
+
+“Yes. Then they repay the money. And they do repay it. I had one man,
+last year, who was a little tardy (he was in the habit of going to the
+public-house); but even he did pay. It is an immense Advantage to one of
+these poor fellows to have a pig. The pig consumes the refuse from the
+man’s cottage and allotment-garden, and the pig’s refuse enriches the
+man’s garden besides. The pig is the poor man’s friend. Come into the
+club-house again.”
+
+The poor man’s friend. Yes. I have often wondered who really was the
+poor man’s friend among a great number of competitors, and I now clearly
+perceive him to be the pig. _He_ never makes any flourishes about the
+poor man. _He_ never gammons the poor man—except to his manifest
+advantage in the article of bacon. _He_ never comes down to this house,
+or goes down to his constituents. He openly declares to the poor man, “I
+want my sty because I am a Pig. I desire to have as much to eat as you
+can by any means stuff me with, because I am a Pig.” _He_ never gives
+the poor man a sovereign for bringing up a family. _He_ never grunts the
+poor man’s name in vain. And when he dies in the odour of Porkity, he
+cuts up, a highly useful creature and a blessing to the poor man, from
+the ring in his snout to the curl in his tail. Which of the poor man’s
+other friends can say as much? Where is the M.P. who means Mere Pork?
+
+The dreary Sage had glided into these reflections, when he found himself
+sitting by the club-house fire, surrounded by green smock-frocks and
+shapeless hats: with Friar Bacon lively, busy, and expert, at a little
+table near him.
+
+“Now, then, come. The first five!” said Friar Bacon. “Where are you?”
+
+“Order!” cried a merry-faced little man, who had brought his young
+daughter with him to see life, and who always modestly hid his face in
+his beer-mug after he had thus assisted the business.
+
+“John Nightingale, William Thrush, Joseph Blackbird, Cecil Robin, and
+Thomas Linnet!” cried Friar Bacon.
+
+“Here, sir!” and “Here, sir!” And Linnet, Robin, Blackbird, Thrush, and
+Nightingale, stood confessed.
+
+We, the undersigned, declare, in effect, by this written paper, that each
+of us is responsible for the repayment of this pig-money by each of the
+other. “Sure you understand, Nightingale?”
+
+“Ees, sur.”
+
+“Can you write your name, Nightingale?”
+
+“Na, sur.”
+
+Nightingale’s eye upon his name, as Friar Bacon wrote it, was a sight to
+consider in after years. Rather incredulous was Nightingale, with a hand
+at the corner of his mouth, and his head on one side, as to those
+drawings really meaning him. Doubtful was Nightingale whether any virtue
+had gone out of him in that committal to paper. Meditative was
+Nightingale as to what would come of young Nightingale’s growing up to
+the acquisition of that art. Suspended was the interest of Nightingale,
+when his name was done—as if he thought the letters were only sown, to
+come up presently in some other form. Prodigious, and wrong-handed was
+the cross made by Nightingale on much encouragement—the strokes directed
+from him instead of towards him; and most patient and sweet-humoured was
+the smile of Nightingale as he stepped back into a general laugh.
+
+“Order!” cried the little man. Immediately disappearing into his mug.
+
+“Ralph Mangel, Roger Wurzel, Edward Vetches, Matthew Carrot, and Charles
+Taters!” said Friar Bacon.
+
+“All here, sir.”
+
+“You understand it, Mangel?”
+
+“Iss, sir, I unnerstaans it.”
+
+“Can you write your name, Mangel?”
+
+“Iss, sir.”
+
+Breathless interest. A dense background of smock-frocks accumulated
+behind Mangel, and many eyes in it looked doubtfully at Friar Bacon, as
+who should say, “Can he really though?” Mangel put down his hat, retired
+a little to get a good look at the paper, wetted his right hand
+thoroughly by drawing it slowly across his mouth, approached the paper
+with great determination, flattened it, sat down at it, and got well to
+his work. Circuitous and sea-serpent-like, were the movements of the
+tongue of Mangel while he formed the letters; elevated were the eyebrows
+of Mangel and sidelong the eyes, as, with his left whisker reposing on
+his left arm, they followed his performance; many were the misgivings of
+Mangel, and slow was his retrospective meditation touching the junction
+of the letter p with h; something too active was the big forefinger of
+Mangel in its propensity to rub out without proved cause. At last, long
+and deep was the breath drawn by Mangel when he laid down the pen; long
+and deep the wondering breath drawn by the background—as if they had
+watched his walking across the rapids of Niagara, on stilts, and now
+cried, “He has done it!”
+
+ [Picture: Forming the Pig-clubs]
+
+But, Mangel was an honest man, if ever honest man lived. “T’owt to be a
+hell, sir,” said he, contemplating his work, “and I ha’ made a t on ’t.”
+
+The over-fraught bosoms of the background found relief in a roar of
+laughter.
+
+“Or—DER!” cried the little man. “CHEER!” And after that second word,
+came forth from his mug no more.
+
+Several other clubs signed, and received their money. Very few could
+write their names; all who could not, pleaded that they could not, more
+or less sorrowfully, and always with a shake of the head, and in a lower
+voice than their natural speaking voice. Crosses could be made standing;
+signatures must be sat down to. There was no exception to this rule.
+Meantime, the various club-members smoked, drank their beer, and talked
+together quite unrestrained. They all wore their hats, except when they
+went up to Friar Bacon’s table. The merry-faced little man offered his
+beer, with a natural good-fellowship, both to the Dreary one and
+Philosewers. Both partook of it with thanks.
+
+“Seven o’clock!” said Friar Bacon. “And now we better get across to the
+concert, men, for the music will be beginning.”
+
+The concert was in Friar Bacon’s laboratory; a large building near at
+hand, in an open field. The bettermost people of the village and
+neighbourhood were in a gallery on one side, and, in a gallery opposite
+the orchestra. The whole space below was filled with the labouring
+people and their families, to the number of five or six hundred. We had
+been obliged to turn away two hundred to-night, Friar Bacon said, for
+want of room—and that, not counting the boys, of whom we had taken in
+only a few picked ones, by reason of the boys, as a class, being given to
+too fervent a custom of applauding with their boot-heels.
+
+The performers were the ladies of Friar Bacon’s family, and two
+gentlemen; one of them, who presided, a Doctor of Music. A piano was the
+only instrument. Among the vocal pieces, we had a negro melody
+(rapturously encored), the Indian Drum, and the Village Blacksmith;
+neither did we want for fashionable Italian, having _Ah! non giunge_, and
+_Mi manca la voce_. Our success was splendid; our good-humoured,
+unaffected, and modest bearing, a pattern. As to the audience, they were
+far more polite and far more pleased than at the Opera; they were
+faultless. Thus for barely an hour the concert lasted, with thousands of
+great bottles looking on from the walls, containing the results of Friar
+Bacon’s Million and one experiments in agricultural chemistry; and
+containing too, no doubt, a variety of materials with which the Friar
+could have blown us all through the roof at five minutes’ notice.
+
+God save the Queen being done, the good Friar stepped forward and said a
+few words, more particularly concerning two points; firstly, that
+Saturday half-holiday, which it would be kind in farmers to grant;
+secondly, the additional Allotment-grounds we were going to establish, in
+consequence of the happy success of the system, but which we could not
+guarantee should entitle the holders to be members of the club, because
+the present members must consider and settle that question for
+themselves: a bargain between man and man being always a bargain, and we
+having made over the club to them as the original Allotment-men. This
+was loudly applauded, and so, with contented and affectionate cheering,
+it was all over.
+
+As Philosewers, and I the Dreary, posted back to London, looking up at
+the moon and discussing it as a world preparing for the habitation of
+responsible creatures, we expatiated on the honour due to men in this
+world of ours who try to prepare it for a higher course, and to leave the
+race who live and die upon it better than they found them.
+
+
+
+
+FIVE NEW POINTS OF CRIMINAL LAW
+
+
+THE existing Criminal Law has been found in trials for Murder, to be so
+exceedingly hasty, unfair, and oppressive—in a word, to be so very
+objectionable to the amiable persons accused of that thoughtless act—that
+it is, we understand, the intention of the Government to bring in a Bill
+for its amendment. We have been favoured with an outline of its probable
+provisions.
+
+It will be grounded on the profound principle that the real offender is
+the Murdered Person; but for whose obstinate persistency in being
+murdered, the interesting fellow-creature to be tried could not have got
+into trouble.
+
+Its leading enactments may be expected to resolve themselves under the
+following heads:
+
+1. There shall be no judge. Strong representations have been made by
+highly popular culprits that the presence of this obtrusive character is
+prejudicial to their best interests. The Court will be composed of a
+political gentleman, sitting in a secluded room commanding a view of St.
+James’s Park, who has already more to do than any human creature can, by
+any stretch of the human imagination, be supposed capable of doing.
+
+2. The jury to consist of Five Thousand Five Hundred and Fifty-five
+Volunteers.
+
+3. The jury to be strictly prohibited from seeing either the accused or
+the witnesses. They are not to be sworn. They are on no account to hear
+the evidence. They are to receive it, or such representations of it, as
+may happen to fall in their way; and they will constantly write letters
+about it to all the Papers.
+
+4. Supposing the trial to be a trial for Murder by poisoning, and
+supposing the hypothetical case, or the evidence, for the prosecution to
+charge the administration of two poisons, say Arsenic and Antimony; and
+supposing the taint of Arsenic in the body to be possible but not
+probable, and the presence of Antimony in the body, to be an absolute
+certainty; it will then become the duty of the jury to confine their
+attention solely to the Arsenic, and entirely to dismiss the Antimony
+from their minds.
+
+5. The symptoms preceding the death of the real offender (or Murdered
+Person) being described in evidence by medical practitioners who saw
+them, other medical practitioners who never saw them shall be required to
+state whether they are inconsistent with certain known diseases—but,
+_they shall never be asked whether they are not exactly consistent with
+the administration of Poison_. To illustrate this enactment in the
+proposed Bill by a case:—A raging mad dog is seen to run into the house
+where Z lives alone, foaming at the mouth. Z and the mad dog are for
+some time left together in that house under proved circumstances,
+irresistibly leading to the conclusion that Z has been bitten by the dog.
+Z is afterwards found lying on his bed in a state of hydrophobia, and
+with the marks of the dog’s teeth. Now, the symptoms of that disease
+being identical with those of another disease called Tetanus, which might
+supervene on Z’s running a rusty nail into a certain part of his foot,
+medical practitioners who never saw Z, shall bear testimony to that
+abstract fact, and it shall then be incumbent on the Registrar-General to
+certify that Z died of a rusty nail.
+
+It is hoped that these alterations in the present mode of procedure will
+not only be quite satisfactory to the accused person (which is the first
+great consideration), but will also tend, in a tolerable degree, to the
+welfare and safety of society. For it is not sought in this moderate and
+prudent measure to be wholly denied that it is an inconvenience to
+Society to be poisoned overmuch.
+
+
+
+
+LEIGH HUNT: A REMONSTRANCE
+
+
+“THE sense of beauty and gentleness, of moral beauty and faithful
+gentleness, grew upon him as the clear evening closed in. When he went
+to visit his relative at Putney, he still carried with him his work, and
+the books he more immediately wanted. Although his bodily powers had
+been giving way, his most conspicuous qualities, his memory for books,
+and his affection remained; and when his hair was white, when his ample
+chest had grown slender, when the very proportion of his height had
+visibly lessened, his step was still ready, and his dark eyes brightened
+at every happy expression, and at every thought of kindness. His death
+was simply exhaustion; he broke off his work to lie down and repose. So
+gentle was the final approach, that he scarcely recognised it till the
+very last, and then it came without terrors. His physical suffering had
+not been severe; at the latest hour he said that his only uneasiness was
+failing breath. And that failing breath was used to express his sense of
+the inexhaustible kindness he had received from the family who had been
+so unexpectedly made his nurses,—to draw from one of his sons, by minute,
+eager, and searching questions, all that he could learn about the latest
+vicissitudes and growing hopes of Italy,—to ask the friends and children
+around him for news of those whom he loved,—and to send love and messages
+to the absent who loved him.”
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Thus, with a manly simplicity and filial affection, writes the eldest son
+of Leigh Hunt in recording his father’s death. These are the closing
+words of a new edition of _The Autobiography of Leigh Hunt_, published by
+Messrs. Smith and Elder, of Cornhill, revised by that son, and enriched
+with an introductory chapter of remarkable beauty and tenderness. The
+son’s first presentation of his father to the reader, “rather tall,
+straight as an arrow, looking slenderer than he really was; his hair
+black and shining, and slightly inclined to wave; his head high, his
+forehead straight and white, his eyes black and sparkling, his general
+complexion dark; in his whole carriage and manner an extraordinary degree
+of life,” completes the picture. It is the picture of the flourishing
+and fading away of man that is born of a woman and hath but a short time
+to live.
+
+In his presentation of his father’s moral nature and intellectual
+qualities, Mr. Hunt is no less faithful and no less touching. Those who
+knew Leigh Hunt, will see the bright face and hear the musical voice
+again, when he is recalled to them in this passage: “Even at seasons of
+the greatest depression in his fortunes, he always attracted many
+visitors, but still not so much for any repute that attended him as for
+his personal qualities. Few men were more attractive, in society,
+whether in a large company or over the fireside. His manners were
+peculiarly animated; his conversation, varied, ranging over a great field
+of subjects, was moved and called forth by the response of his companion,
+be that companion philosopher or student, sage or boy, man or woman; and
+he was equally ready for the most lively topics or for the gravest
+reflections—his expression easily adapting itself to the tone of his
+companion’s mind. With much freedom of manners, he combined a
+spontaneous courtesy that never failed, and a considerateness derived
+from a ceaseless kindness of heart that invariably fascinated even
+strangers.” Or in this: “His animation, his sympathy with what was gay
+and pleasurable; his avowed doctrine of cultivating cheerfulness, were
+manifest on the surface, and could be appreciated by those who knew him
+in society, most probably even exaggerated as salient traits, on which he
+himself insisted _with a sort of gay and ostentatious wilfulness_.”
+
+The last words describe one of the most captivating peculiarities of a
+most original and engaging man, better than any other words could. The
+reader is besought to observe them, for a reason that shall presently be
+given. Lastly: “The anxiety to recognise the right of others, the
+tendency to ‘refine’, which was noted by an early school companion, and
+the propensity to elaborate every thought, made him, along with the
+direct argument by which he sustained his own conviction, recognise and
+almost admit all that might be said on the opposite side”. For these
+reasons, and for others suggested with equal felicity, and with equal
+fidelity, the son writes of the father, “It is most desirable that his
+qualities should be known as they were; for such deficiencies as he had
+are the honest explanation of his mistakes; while, as the reader may see
+from his writings and his conduct, they are not, as the faults of which
+he was accused would be, incompatible with the noblest faculties both of
+head and heart. To know Leigh Hunt as he was, was to hold him in
+reverence and love.”
+
+These quotations are made here, with a special object. It is not, that
+the personal testimony of one who knew Leigh Hunt well, may be borne to
+their truthfulness. It is not, that it may be recorded in these pages,
+as in his son’s introductory chapter, that his life was of the most
+amiable and domestic kind, that his wants were few, that his way of life
+was frugal, that he was a man of small expenses, no ostentations, a
+diligent labourer, and a secluded man of letters. It is not, that the
+inconsiderate and forgetful may be reminded of his wrongs and sufferings
+in the days of the Regency, and of the national disgrace of his
+imprisonment. It is not, that their forbearance may be entreated for his
+grave, in right of his graceful fancy or his political labours and
+endurances, though—
+
+ Not only we, the latest seed of Time,
+ New men, that in the flying of a wheel
+ Cry down the past, not only we, that prate
+ Of rights and wrongs, have loved the people well.
+
+It is, that a duty may be done in the most direct way possible. An act
+of plain, clear duty.
+
+Four or five years ago, the writer of these lines was much pained by
+accidentally encountering a printed statement, “that Mr. Leigh Hunt was
+the original of Harold Skimpole in _Bleak House_”. The writer of these
+lines, is the author of that book. The statement came from America. It
+is no disrespect to that country, in which the writer has, perhaps, as
+many friends and as true an interest as any man that lives,
+good-humouredly to state the fact, that he has, now and then, been the
+subject of paragraphs in Transatlantic newspapers, more surprisingly
+destitute of all foundation in truth than the wildest delusions of the
+wildest lunatics. For reasons born of this experience, he let the thing
+go by.
+
+But, since Mr. Leigh Hunt’s death, the statement has been revived in
+England. The delicacy and generosity evinced in its revival, are for the
+rather late consideration of its revivers. The fact is this:
+
+Exactly those graces and charms of manner which are remembered in the
+words we have quoted, were remembered by the author of the work of
+fiction in question, when he drew the character in question. Above all
+other things, that “sort of gay and ostentatious wilfulness” in the
+humouring of a subject, which had many a time delighted him, and
+impressed him as being unspeakably whimsical and attractive, was the airy
+quality he wanted for the man he invented. Partly for this reason, and
+partly (he has since often grieved to think) for the pleasure it afforded
+him to find that delightful manner reproducing itself under his hand, he
+yielded to the temptation of too often making the character _speak_ like
+his old friend. He no more thought, God forgive him! that the admired
+original would ever be charged with the imaginary vices of the fictitious
+creature, than he has himself ever thought of charging the blood of
+Desdemona and Othello, on the innocent Academy model who sat for Iago’s
+leg in the picture. Even as to the mere occasional manner, he meant to
+be so cautious and conscientious, that he privately referred the proof
+sheets of the first number of that book to two intimate literary friends
+of Leigh Hunt (both still living), and altered the whole of that part of
+the text on their discovering too strong a resemblance to his “way”.
+
+He cannot see the son lay this wreath on the father’s tomb, and leave him
+to the possibility of ever thinking that the present words might have
+righted the father’s memory and were left unwritten. He cannot know that
+his own son may have to explain his father when folly or malice can wound
+his heart no more, and leave this task undone.
+
+
+
+
+THE TATTLESNIVEL BLEATER
+
+
+THE pen is taken in hand on the present occasion, by a private individual
+(not wholly unaccustomed to literary composition), for the exposure of a
+conspiracy of a most frightful nature; a conspiracy which, like the
+deadly Upas-tree of Java, on which the individual produced a poem in his
+earlier youth (not wholly devoid of length), which was so flatteringly
+received (in circles not wholly unaccustomed to form critical opinions),
+that he was recommended to publish it, and would certainly have carried
+out the suggestion, but for private considerations (not wholly
+unconnected with expense).
+
+The individual who undertakes the exposure of the gigantic conspiracy now
+to be laid bare in all its hideous deformity, is an inhabitant of the
+town of Tattlesnivel—a lowly inhabitant, it may be, but one who, as an
+Englishman and a man, will ne’er abase his eye before the gaudy and the
+mocking throng.
+
+Tattlesnivel stoops to demand no championship from her sons. On an
+occasion in History, our bluff British monarch, our Eighth Royal Harry,
+almost went there. And long ere the periodical in which this exposure
+will appear, had sprung into being, Tattlesnivel had unfurled that
+standard which yet waves upon her battlements. The standard alluded to,
+is THE TATTLESNIVEL BLEATER, containing the latest intelligence, and
+state of markets, down to the hour of going to press, and presenting a
+favourable local medium for advertisers, on a graduated scale of charges,
+considerably diminishing in proportion to the guaranteed number of
+insertions.
+
+It were bootless to expatiate on the host of talent engaged in formidable
+phalanx to do fealty to the Bleater. Suffice it to select, for present
+purposes, one of the most gifted and (but for the wide and deep
+ramifications of an un-English conspiracy) most rising, of the men who
+are bold Albion’s pride. It were needless, after this preamble, to point
+the finger more directly at the LONDON CORRESPONDENT OF THE TATTLESNIVEL
+BLEATER.
+
+On the weekly letters of that Correspondent, on the flexibility of their
+English, on the boldness of their grammar, on the originality of their
+quotations (never to be found as they are printed, in any book existing),
+on the priority of their information, on their intimate acquaintance with
+the secret thoughts and unexecuted intentions of men, it would ill become
+the humble Tattlesnivellian who traces these words, to dwell. They are
+graven in the memory; they are on the Bleater’s file. Let them be
+referred to.
+
+But from the infamous, the dark, the subtle conspiracy which spreads its
+baleful roots throughout the land, and of which the Bleater’s London
+Correspondent is the one sole subject, it is the purpose of the lowly
+Tattlesnivellian who undertakes this revelation, to tear the veil. Nor
+will he shrink from his self-imposed labour, Herculean though it be.
+
+The conspiracy begins in the very Palace of the Sovereign Lady of our
+Ocean Isle. Leal and loyal as it is the proud vaunt of the Bleater’s
+readers, one and all, to be, the inhabitant who pens this exposure does
+not personally impeach, either her Majesty the queen, or the illustrious
+Prince Consort. But, some silken-clad smoothers, some purple parasites,
+some fawners in frippery, some greedy and begartered ones in gorgeous
+garments, he does impeach—ay, and wrathfully! Is it asked on what
+grounds? They shall be stated.
+
+The Bleater’s London Correspondent, in the prosecution of his important
+inquiries, goes down to Windsor, sends in his card, has a confidential
+interview with her Majesty and the illustrious Prince Consort. For a
+time, the restraints of Royalty are thrown aside in the cheerful
+conversation of the Bleater’s London Correspondent, in his fund of
+information, in his flow of anecdote, in the atmosphere of his genius;
+her Majesty brightens, the illustrious Prince Consort thaws, the cares of
+State and the conflicts of Party are forgotten, lunch is proposed. Over
+that unassuming and domestic table, her Majesty communicates to the
+Bleater’s London Correspondent that it is her intention to send his Royal
+Highness the Prince of Wales to inspect the top of the Great
+Pyramid—thinking it likely to improve his acquaintance with the views of
+the people. Her Majesty further communicates that she has made up her
+royal mind (and that the Prince Consort has made up his illustrious mind)
+to the bestowal of the vacant Garter, let us say on Mr. Roebuck. The
+younger Royal children having been introduced at the request of the
+Bleater’s London Correspondent, and having been by him closely observed
+to present the usual external indications of good health, the happy knot
+is severed, with a sigh the Royal bow is once more strung to its full
+tension, the Bleater’s London Correspondent returns to London, writes his
+letter, and tells the Tattlesnivel Bleater what he knows. All
+Tattlesnivel reads it, and knows that he knows it. But, _does_ his Royal
+Highness the Prince of Wales ultimately go to the top of the Great
+Pyramid? _Does_ Mr. Roebuck ultimately get the Garter? No. Are the
+younger Royal children even ultimately found to be well? On the
+contrary, they have—and on that very day had—the measles. Why is this?
+_Because the conspirators against the Bleater’s London Correspondent have
+stepped in with their dark machinations_. Because her Majesty and the
+Prince Consort are artfully induced to change their minds, from north to
+south, from east to west, immediately after it is known to the
+conspirators that they have put themselves in communication with the
+Bleater’s London Correspondent. It is now indignantly demanded, by whom
+are they so tampered with? It is now indignantly demanded, who took the
+responsibility of concealing the indisposition of those Royal children
+from their Royal and illustrious parents, and of bringing them down from
+their beds, disguised, expressly to confound the London Correspondent of
+the Tattlesnivel Bleater? Who are those persons, it is again asked? Let
+not rank and favour protect them. Let the traitors be exhibited in the
+face of day!
+
+Lord John Russell is in this conspiracy. Tell us not that his Lordship
+is a man of too much spirit and honour. Denunciation is hurled against
+him. The proof? The proof is here.
+
+The Time is panting for an answer to the question, Will Lord John Russell
+consent to take office under Lord Palmerston? Good. The London
+Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater is in the act of writing his
+weekly letter, finds himself rather at a loss to settle this question
+finally, leaves off, puts his hat on, goes down to the lobby of the House
+of Commons, sends in for Lord John Russell, and has him out. He draws
+his arm through his Lordship’s, takes him aside, and says, “John, will
+you ever accept office under Palmerston?” His Lordship replies, “I will
+not.” The Bleater’s London Correspondent retorts, with the caution such
+a man is bound to use, “John, think again; say nothing to me rashly; is
+there any temper here?” His Lordship replies, calmly, “None whatever.”
+After giving him time for reflection, the Bleater’s London Correspondent
+says, “Once more, John, let me put a question to you. Will you ever
+accept office under Palmerston?” His Lordship answers (note the exact
+expressions), “Nothing shall induce me, ever to accept a seat in a
+Cabinet of which Palmerston is the Chief.” They part, the London
+Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater finishes his letter, and—always
+being withheld by motives of delicacy, from plainly divulging his means
+of getting accurate information on every subject, at first hand—puts in
+it, this passage: “Lord John Russell is spoken of, by blunderers, for
+Foreign Affairs; but I have the best reasons for assuring your readers,
+that” (giving prominence to the exact expressions, it will be observed)
+“‘NOTHING WILL EVER INDUCE HIM, TO ACCEPT A SEAT IN A CABINET OF WHICH
+PALMERSTON IS THE CHIEF.’ On this you may implicitly rely.” What
+happens? On the very day of the publication of that number of the
+Bleater—the malignity of the conspirators being even manifested in the
+selection of the day—Lord John Russell takes the Foreign Office! Comment
+were superfluous.
+
+The people of Tattlesnivel will be told, have been told, that Lord John
+Russell is a man of his word. He may be, on some occasions; but, when
+overshadowed by this dark and enormous growth of conspiracy, Tattlesnivel
+knows him to be otherwise. “I happen to be certain, deriving my
+information from a source which cannot be doubted to be authentic,” wrote
+the London Correspondent of the Bleater, within the last year, “that Lord
+John Russell bitterly regrets having made that explicit speech of last
+Monday.” These are not roundabout phrases; these are plain words. What
+does Lord John Russell (apparently by accident), within eight-and-forty
+hours after their diffusion over the civilised globe? Rises in his place
+in Parliament, and unblushingly declares that if the occasion could arise
+five hundred times, for his making that very speech, he would make it
+five hundred times! Is there no conspiracy here? And is this
+combination against one who would be always right if he were not proved
+always wrong, to be endured in a country that boasts of its freedom and
+its fairness?
+
+But, the Tattlesnivellian who now raises his voice against intolerable
+oppression, may be told that, after all, this is a political conspiracy.
+He may be told, forsooth, that Mr. Disraeli’s being in it, that Lord
+Derby’s being in it, that Mr. Bright’s being in it, that every Home,
+Foreign, and Colonial Secretary’s being in it, that every ministry’s and
+every opposition’s being in it, are but proofs that men will do in
+politics what they would do in nothing else. Is this the plea? If so,
+the rejoinder is, that the mighty conspiracy includes the whole circle of
+Artists of all kinds, and comprehends all degrees of men, down to the
+worst criminal and the hangman who ends his career. For, all these are
+intimately known to the London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater,
+and all these deceive him.
+
+Sir, put it to the proof. There is the Bleater on the file—documentary
+evidence. Weeks, months, before the Exhibition of the Royal Academy, the
+Bleater’s London Correspondent knows the subjects of all the leading
+pictures, knows what the painters first meant to do, knows what they
+afterwards substituted for what they first meant to do, knows what they
+ought to do and won’t do, knows what they ought not to do and will do,
+knows to a letter from whom they have commissions, knows to a shilling
+how much they are to be paid. Now, no sooner is each studio clear of the
+remarkable man to whom each studio-occupant has revealed himself as he
+does not reveal himself to his nearest and dearest bosom friend, than
+conspiracy and fraud begin. Alfred the Great becomes the Fairy Queen;
+Moses viewing the Promised Land, turns out to be Moses going to the Fair;
+Portrait of His Grace the Archbishop of Canterbury, is transformed, as if
+by irreverent enchantment of the dissenting interest, into A Favourite
+Terrier, or Cattle Grazing; and the most extraordinary work of art in the
+list described by the Bleater, is coolly sponged out altogether, and
+asserted never to have had existence at all, even in the most shadow
+thoughts of its executant! This is vile enough, but this is not all.
+Picture-buyers then come forth from their secret positions, and creep
+into their places in the assassin-multitude of conspirators. Mr. Baring,
+after expressly telling the Bleater’s London Correspondent that he had
+bought No. 39 for one thousand guineas, gives it up to somebody unknown
+for a couple of hundred pounds; the Marquis of Lansdowne pretends to have
+no knowledge whatever of the commissions to which the London
+Correspondent of the Bleater swore him, but allows a Railway Contractor
+to cut him out for half the money. Similar examples might be multiplied.
+Shame, shame, on these men! Is this England?
+
+Sir, look again at Literature. The Bleater’s London Correspondent is not
+merely acquainted with all the eminent writers, but is in possession of
+the secrets of their souls. He is versed in their hidden meanings and
+references, sees their manuscripts before publication, and knows the
+subjects and titles of their books when they are not begun. How dare
+those writers turn upon the eminent man and depart from every intention
+they have confided to him? How do they justify themselves in entirely
+altering their manuscripts, changing their titles, and abandoning their
+subjects? Will they deny, in the face of Tattlesnivel, that they do so?
+If they have such hardihood, let the file of the Bleater strike them
+dumb. By their fruits they shall be known. Let their works be compared
+with the anticipatory letters of the Bleater’s London Correspondent, and
+their falsehood and deceit will become manifest as the sun; it will be
+seen that they do nothing which they stand pledged to the Bleater’s
+London Correspondent to do; it will be seen that they are among the
+blackest parties in this black and base conspiracy. This will become
+apparent, sir, not only as to their public proceedings but as to their
+private affairs. The outraged Tattlesnivellian who now drags this
+infamous combination into the face of day, charges those literary persons
+with making away with their property, imposing on the Income Tax
+Commissioners, keeping false books, and entering into sham contracts. He
+accuses them on the unimpeachable faith of the London Correspondent of
+the Tattlesnivel Bleater. With whose evidence they will find it
+impossible to reconcile their own account of any transaction of their
+lives.
+
+The national character is degenerating under the influence of the
+ramifications of this tremendous conspiracy. Forgery is committed,
+constantly. A person of note—any sort of person of note—dies. The
+Bleater’s London Correspondent knows what his circumstances are, what his
+savings are (if any), who his creditors are, all about his children and
+relations, and (in general, before his body is cold) describes his will.
+Is that will ever proved? Never! Some other will is substituted; the
+real instrument, destroyed. And this (as has been before observed), is
+England.
+
+Who are the workmen and artificers, enrolled upon the books of this
+treacherous league? From what funds are they paid, and with what
+ceremonies are they sworn to secrecy? Are there none such? Observe what
+follows. A little time ago the Bleater’s London Correspondent had this
+passage: “Boddleboy is pianoforte playing at St. Januarius’s Gallery,
+with pretty tolerable success! He clears three hundred pounds per night.
+Not bad this!!” The builder of St. Januarius’s Gallery (plunged to the
+throat in the conspiracy) met with this piece of news, and observed, with
+characteristic coarseness, “that the Bleater’s London Correspondent was a
+Blind Ass”. Being pressed by a man of spirit to give his reasons for
+this extraordinary statement, he declared that the Gallery, crammed to
+suffocation, would not hold two hundred pounds, and that its expenses
+were, probably, at least half what it did hold. The man of spirit
+(himself a Tattlesnivellian) had the Gallery measured within a week from
+that hour, and it would not hold two hundred pounds! Now, can the
+poorest capacity doubt that it had been altered in the meantime?
+
+And so the conspiracy extends, through every grade of society, down to
+the condemned criminal in prison, the hangman, and the Ordinary. Every
+famous murderer within the last ten years has desecrated his last moments
+by falsifying his confidences imparted specially to the London
+Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater; on every such occasion, Mr.
+Calcraft has followed the degrading example; and the reverend Ordinary,
+forgetful of his cloth, and mindful only (it would seem, alas!) of the
+conspiracy, has committed himself to some account or other of the
+criminal’s demeanour and conversation, which has been diametrically
+opposed to the exclusive information of the London Correspondent of the
+Bleater. And this (as has been before observed) is Merry England!
+
+A man of true genius, however, is not easily defeated. The Bleater’s
+London Correspondent, probably beginning to suspect the existence of a
+plot against him, has recently fallen on a new style, which, as being
+very difficult to countermine, may necessitate the organisation of a new
+conspiracy. One of his masterly letters, lately, disclosed the adoption
+of this style—which was remarked with profound sensation throughout
+Tattlesnivel—in the following passage: “Mentioning literary small talk, I
+may tell you that some new and extraordinary rumours are afloat
+concerning the conversations I have previously mentioned, alleged to have
+taken place in the first floor front (situated over the street door), of
+Mr. X. Ameter (the poet so well known to your readers), in which, X.
+Ameter’s great uncle, his second son, his butcher, and a corpulent
+gentleman with one eye universally respected at Kensington, are said not
+to have been on the most friendly footing; I forbear, however, to pursue
+the subject further, this week, my informant not being able to supply me
+with exact particulars.”
+
+But, enough, sir. The inhabitant of Tattlesnivel who has taken pen in
+hand to expose this odious association of unprincipled men against a
+shining (local) character, turns from it with disgust and contempt. Let
+him in few words strip the remaining flimsy covering from the nude object
+of the conspirators, and his loathsome task is ended.
+
+Sir, that object, he contends, is evidently twofold. First, to exhibit
+the London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater in the light of a
+mischievous Blockhead who, by hiring himself out to tell what he cannot
+possibly know, is as great a public nuisance as a Blockhead in a corner
+can be. Second, to suggest to the men of Tattlesnivel that it does not
+improve their town to have so much Dry Rubbish shot there.
+
+Now, sir, on both these points Tattlesnivel demands in accents of
+Thunder, Where is the Attorney General? Why doesn’t the _Times_ take it
+up? (Is the latter in the conspiracy? It never adopts his views, or
+quotes him, and incessantly contradicts him.) Tattlesnivel, sir,
+remembering that our forefathers contended with the Norman at Hastings,
+and bled at a variety of other places that will readily occur to you,
+demands that its birthright shall not be bartered away for a mess of
+pottage. Have a care, sir, have a care! Or Tattlesnivel (its idle
+Rifles piled in its scouted streets) may be seen ere long, advancing with
+its Bleater to the foot of the Throne, and demanding redress for this
+conspiracy, from the orbed and sceptred hands of Majesty itself!
+
+
+
+
+THE YOUNG MAN FROM THE COUNTRY
+
+
+A SONG of the hour, now in course of being sung and whistled in every
+street, the other day reminded the writer of these words—as he chanced to
+pass a fag-end of the song for the twentieth time in a short London
+walk—that twenty years ago, a little book on the United States, entitled
+_American Notes_, was published by “a Young Man from the Country”, who
+had just seen and left it.
+
+This Young Man from the Country fell into a deal of trouble, by reason of
+having taken the liberty to believe that he perceived in America downward
+popular tendencies for which his young enthusiasm had been anything but
+prepared. It was in vain for the Young Man to offer in extenuation of
+his belief that no stranger could have set foot on those shores with a
+feeling of livelier interest in the country, and stronger faith in it,
+than he. Those were the days when the Tories had made their Ashburton
+Treaty, and when Whigs and Radicals must have no theory disturbed. All
+three parties waylaid and mauled the Young Man from the Country, and
+showed that he knew nothing about the country.
+
+As the Young Man from the Country had observed in the Preface to his
+little book, that he “could bide his time”, he took all this in silent
+part for eight years. Publishing then, a cheap edition of his book, he
+made no stronger protest than the following:
+
+ “My readers have opportunities of judging for themselves whether the
+ influences and tendencies which I distrusted in America, have any
+ existence but in my imagination. They can examine for themselves
+ whether there has been anything in the public career of that country
+ during these past eight years, or whether there is anything in its
+ present position, at home or abroad, which suggests that those
+ influences and tendencies really do exist. As they find the fact,
+ they will judge me. If they discern any evidences of wrong-going, in
+ any direction that I have indicated, they will acknowledge that I had
+ reason in what I wrote. If they discern no such thing, they will
+ consider me altogether mistaken. I have nothing to defend, or to
+ explain away. The truth is the truth; and neither childish
+ absurdities, nor unscrupulous contradictions, can make it otherwise.
+ The earth would still move round the sun, though the whole Catholic
+ Church said No.”
+
+Twelve more years having since passed away, it may now, at last, be
+simply just towards the Young Man from the Country, to compare what he
+originally wrote, with recent events and their plain motive powers.
+Treating of the House of Representatives at Washington, he wrote thus:
+
+ “Did I recognise in this assembly, a body of men, who, applying
+ themselves in a new world to correct some of the falsehoods and vices
+ of the old, purified the avenues to Public Life, paved the dirty ways
+ to Place and Power, debated and made laws for the Common Good, and
+ had no party but their Country?
+
+ “I saw in them, the wheels that move the meanest perversion of
+ virtuous Political Machinery that the worst tools ever wrought.
+ Despicable trickery at elections; under-handed tamperings with public
+ officers; cowardly attacks upon opponents, with scurrilous newspapers
+ for shields, and hired pens for daggers; shameful trucklings to
+ mercenary knaves, whose claim to be considered, is, that every day
+ and week they sow new crops of ruin with their venal types, which are
+ the dragon’s teeth of yore, in everything but sharpness; aidings and
+ abettings of every bad inclination in the popular mind, and artful
+ suppressions of all its good influences: such things as these, and in
+ a word, Dishonest Faction in its most depraved and most unblushing
+ form, stared out from every corner of the crowded hall.
+
+ “Did I see among them, the intelligence and refinement: the true,
+ honest, patriotic heart of America? Here and there, were drops of
+ its blood and life, but they scarcely coloured the stream of
+ desperate adventurers which sets that way for profit and for pay. It
+ is the game of these men, and of their profligate organs, to make the
+ strife of politics so fierce and brutal, and so destructive of all
+ self-respect in worthy men, that sensitive and delicate-minded
+ persons shall be kept aloof, and they, and such as they, be left to
+ battle out their selfish views unchecked. And thus this lowest of
+ all scrambling fights goes on, and they who in other countries would,
+ from their intelligence and station, most aspire to make the laws, do
+ here recoil the farthest from that degradation.
+
+ “That there are, among the representatives of the people in both
+ Houses, and among all parties, some men of high character and great
+ abilities, I need not say. The foremost among those politicians who
+ are known in Europe, have been already described, and I see no reason
+ to depart from the rule I have laid down for my guidance, of
+ abstaining from all mention of individuals. It will be sufficient to
+ add, that to the most favourable accounts that have been written of
+ them, I fully and most heartily subscribe; and that personal
+ intercourse and free communication have bred within me, not the
+ result predicted in the very doubtful proverb, but increased
+ admiration and respect.”
+
+Towards the end of his book, the Young Man from the Country thus
+expressed himself concerning its people:
+
+ “They are, by nature, frank, brave, cordial, hospitable, and
+ affectionate. Cultivation and refinement seem but to enhance their
+ warmth of heart and ardent enthusiasm; and it is the possession of
+ these latter qualities in a most remarkable degree, which renders an
+ educated American one of the most endearing and most generous of
+ friends. I never was so won upon, as by this class; never yielded up
+ my full confidence and esteem so readily and pleasurably, as to them;
+ never can make again, in half a year, so many friends for whom I seem
+ to entertain the regard of half a life.
+
+ “These qualities are natural, I implicitly believe, to the whole
+ people. That they are, however, sadly sapped and blighted in their
+ growth among the mass; and that there are influences at work which
+ endanger them still more, and give but little present promise of
+ their healthy restoration; is a truth that ought to be told.
+
+ “It is an essential part of every national character to pique itself
+ mightily upon its faults, and to deduce tokens of its virtue or its
+ wisdom from their very exaggeration. One great blemish in the
+ popular mind of America, and the prolific parent of an innumerable
+ brood of evils, is Universal Distrust. Yet the American citizen
+ plumes himself upon this spirit, even when he is sufficiently
+ dispassionate to perceive the ruin it works; and will often adduce
+ it, in spite of his own reason, as an instance of the great sagacity
+ and acuteness of the people, and their superior shrewdness and
+ independence.
+
+ “‘You carry,’ says the stranger, ‘this jealousy and distrust into
+ every transaction of public life. By repelling worthy men from your
+ legislative assemblies, it has bred up a class of candidates for the
+ suffrage, who, in their every act, disgrace your Institutions and
+ your people’s choice. It has rendered you so fickle, and so given to
+ change, that your inconstancy has passed into a proverb; for you no
+ sooner set up an idol firmly, than you are sure to pull it down and
+ dash it into fragments: and this, because directly you reward a
+ benefactor, or a public-servant, you distrust him, merely because he
+ _is_ rewarded; and immediately apply yourselves to find out, either
+ that you have been too bountiful in your acknowledgments, or he
+ remiss in his deserts. Any man who attains a high place among you,
+ from the President downwards, may date his downfall from that moment;
+ for any printed lie that any notorious villain pens, although it
+ militate directly against the character and conduct of a life,
+ appeals at once to your distrust, and is believed. You will strain
+ at a gnat in the way of trustfulness and confidence, however fairly
+ won and well deserved; but you will swallow a whole caravan of
+ camels, if they be laden with unworthy doubts and mean suspicions.
+ Is this well, think you, or likely to elevate the character of the
+ governors or the governed, among you?’
+
+ “The answer is invariably the same: ‘There’s freedom of opinion here,
+ you know. Every man thinks for himself, and we are not to be easily
+ overreached. That’s how our people come to be suspicious.’
+
+ “Another prominent feature is the love of ‘smart’ dealing: which
+ gilds over many a swindle and gross breach of trust; many a
+ defalcation, public and private; and enables many a knave to hold his
+ head up with the best, who well deserves a halter: though it has not
+ been without its retributive operation, for this smartness has done
+ more in a few years to impair the public credit, and to cripple the
+ public resources, than dull honesty, however rash, could have
+ effected in a century. The merits of a broken speculation, or a
+ bankruptcy, or of a successful scoundrel, are not gauged by its or
+ his observance of the golden rule, ‘Do as you would be done by’, but
+ are considered with reference to their smartness. I recollect, on
+ both occasions of our passing that ill-fated Cairo on the
+ Mississippi, remarking on the bad effects such gross deceits must
+ have when they exploded, in generating a want of confidence abroad,
+ and discouraging foreign investment: but I was given to understand
+ that this was a very smart scheme by which a deal of money had been
+ made: and that its smartest feature was, that they forgot these
+ things abroad, in a very short time, and speculated again, as freely
+ as ever. The following dialogue I have held a hundred times: ‘Is it
+ not a very disgraceful circumstance that such a man as So-and-so
+ should be acquiring a large property by the most infamous and odious
+ means, and notwithstanding all the crimes of which he has been
+ guilty, should be tolerated and abetted by your citizens? He is a
+ public nuisance, is he not?’ ‘Yes, sir.’ ‘A convicted liar?’ ‘Yes,
+ sir.’ ‘He has been kicked, and cuffed, and caned?’ ‘Yes, sir.’
+ ‘And he is utterly dishonourable, debased, and profligate?’ ‘Yes,
+ sir.’ ‘In the name of wonder, then, what is his merit?’ ‘Well, sir,
+ he is a smart man.’
+
+ “But the foul growth of America has a more tangled root than this;
+ and it strikes its fibres, deep in its licentious Press.
+
+ “Schools may he erected, East, West, North, and South; pupils be
+ taught, and masters reared, by scores upon scores of thousands;
+ colleges may thrive, churches may be crammed, temperance may be
+ diffused, and advancing knowledge in all other forms walk through the
+ land with giant strides; but while the newspaper press of America is
+ in, or near, its present abject state, high moral improvement in that
+ country is hopeless. Year by year, it must and will go back; year by
+ year, the tone of public opinion must sink lower down; year by year,
+ the Congress and the Senate must become of less account before all
+ decent men; and year by year, the memory of the Great Fathers of the
+ Revolution must be outraged more and more, in the bad life of their
+ degenerate child.
+
+ “Among the herd of journals which are published in the States, there
+ are some, the reader scarcely need be told, of character and credit.
+ From personal intercourse with accomplished gentlemen connected with
+ publications of this class, I have derived both pleasure and profit.
+ But the name of these is Few, and of the others Legion; and the
+ influence of the good, is powerless to counteract the moral poison of
+ the bad.
+
+ “Among the gentry of America; among the well-informed and moderate;
+ in the learned professions; at the bar and on the bench; there is, as
+ there can be, but one opinion, in reference to the vicious character
+ of these infamous journals. It is sometimes contended—I will not say
+ strangely, for it is natural to seek excuses for such a disgrace—that
+ their influence is not so great as a visitor would suppose. I must
+ be pardoned for saying that there is no warrant for this plea, and
+ that every fact and circumstance tends directly to the opposite
+ conclusion.
+
+ “When any man, of any grade of desert in intellect or character, can
+ climb to any public distinction, no matter what, in America, without
+ first grovelling down upon the earth, and bending the knee before
+ this monster of depravity; when any private excellence is safe from
+ its attacks; when any social confidence is left unbroken by it; or
+ any tie of social decency and honour is held in the least regard;
+ when any man in that Free Country has freedom of opinion, and
+ presumes to think for himself, and speak for himself, without humble
+ reference to a censorship which, for its rampant ignorance and base
+ dishonesty, he utterly loaths and despises in his heart; when those
+ who most acutely feel its infamy and the reproach it casts upon the
+ nation, and who most denounce it to each other, dare to set their
+ heels upon, and crush it openly, in the sight of all men: then, I
+ will believe that its influence is lessening, and men are returning
+ to their manly senses. But while that Press has its evil eye in
+ every house, and its black hand in every appointment in the state,
+ from a president to a postman; while, with ribald slander for its
+ only stock in trade, it is the standard literature of an enormous
+ class, who must find their reading in a newspaper, or they will not
+ read at all; so long must its odium be upon the country’s head, and
+ so long must the evil it works, be plainly visible in the Republic.”
+
+The foregoing was written in the year eighteen hundred and forty-two. It
+rests with the reader to decide whether it has received any confirmation,
+or assumed any colour of truth, in or about the year eighteen hundred and
+sixty-two.
+
+
+
+
+AN ENLIGHTENED CLERGYMAN
+
+
+AT various places in Suffolk (as elsewhere) penny readings take place
+“for the instruction and amusement of the lower classes”. There is a
+little town in Suffolk called Eye, where the subject of one of these
+readings was a tale (by Mr. Wilkie Collins) from the last Christmas
+Number of this Journal, entitled “Picking up Waifs at Sea”. It appears
+that the Eye gentility was shocked by the introduction of this rude piece
+among the taste and musical glasses of that important town, on which the
+eyes of Europe are notoriously always fixed. In particular, the feelings
+of the vicar’s family were outraged; and a Local Organ (say, the
+Tattlesnivel Bleater) consequently doomed the said piece to everlasting
+oblivion, as being of an “injurious tendency!”
+
+When this fearful fact came to the knowledge of the unhappy writer of the
+doomed tale in question, he covered his face with his robe, previous to
+dying decently under the sharp steel of the ecclesiastical gentility of
+the terrible town of Eye. But the discovery that he was not alone in his
+gloomy glory, revived him, and he still lives.
+
+For, at Stowmarket, in the aforesaid county of Suffolk, at another of
+those penny readings, it was announced that a certain juvenile sketch,
+culled from a volume of sketches (by Boz) and entitled “The Bloomsbury
+Christening”, would be read. Hereupon, the clergyman of that place took
+heart and pen, and addressed the following terrific epistle to a
+gentleman bearing the very appropriate name of Gudgeon:
+
+ STOWMARKET VICARAGE, _Feb._ 25, 1861.
+
+ SIR,—My attention has been directed to a piece called “The Bloomsbury
+ Christening” which you propose to read this evening. Without
+ presuming to claim any interference in the arrangement of the
+ readings, I would suggest to you whether you have on this occasion
+ sufficiently considered the character of the composition you have
+ selected. I quite appreciate the laudable motive of the promoters of
+ the readings to raise the moral tone amongst the working class of the
+ town and to direct this taste in a familiar and pleasant manner.
+ “The Bloomsbury Christening” cannot possibly do this. It trifles
+ with a sacred ordinance, and the language and style, instead of
+ improving the taste, has a direct tendency to lower it.
+
+ I appeal to your right feeling whether it is desirable to give
+ publicity to that which must shock several of your audience, and
+ create a smile amongst others, to be indulged in only by violating
+ the conscientious scruples of their neighbours.
+
+ The ordinance which is here exposed to ridicule is one which is much
+ misunderstood and neglected amongst many families belonging to the
+ Church of England, and the mode in which it is treated in this
+ chapter cannot fail to appear as giving a sanction to, or at least
+ excusing, such neglect.
+
+ Although you are pledged to the public to give this subject, yet I
+ cannot but believe that they would fully justify your substitution of
+ it for another did they know the circumstances. An abridgment would
+ only lessen the evil in a degree, as it is not only the style of the
+ writing but the subject itself which is objectionable.
+
+ Excuse me for troubling you, but I felt that, in common with
+ yourself, I have a grave responsibility in the matter, and I am most
+ truly yours,
+
+ T. S. COLES.
+
+ To Mr. J. Gudgeon.
+
+It is really necessary to explain that this is not a bad joke. It is
+simply a bad fact.
+
+
+
+
+RATHER A STRONG DOSE
+
+
+“DOCTOR JOHN CAMPBELL, the minister of the Tabernacle Chapel, Finsbury,
+and editor of the _British Banner_, etc., with that massive vigour which
+distinguishes his style,” did, we are informed by Mr. Howitt, “deliver a
+verdict in the _Banner_, for November, 1852,” of great importance and
+favour to the Table-rapping cause. We are not informed whether the
+Public, sitting in judgment on the question, reserved any point in this
+great verdict for subsequent consideration; but the verdict would seem to
+have been regarded by a perverse generation as not quite final, inasmuch
+as Mr. Howitt finds it necessary to re-open the case, a round ten years
+afterwards, in nine hundred and sixty-two stiff octavo pages, published
+by Messrs. Longman and Company.
+
+Mr. Howitt is in such a bristling temper on the Supernatural subject,
+that we will not take the great liberty of arguing any point with him.
+But—with the view of assisting him to make converts—we will inform our
+readers, on his conclusive authority, what they are required to believe;
+premising what may rather astonish them in connexion with their views of
+a certain historical trifle, called The Reformation, that their present
+state of unbelief is all the fault of Protestantism, and that “it is high
+time, therefore, to protest against Protestantism”.
+
+They will please to believe, by way of an easy beginning, all the stories
+of good and evil demons, ghosts, prophecies, communication with spirits,
+and practice of magic, that ever obtained, or are said to have ever
+obtained, in the North, in the South, in the East, in the West, from the
+earliest and darkest ages, as to which we have any hazy intelligence,
+real or supposititious, down to the yet unfinished displacement of the
+red men in North America. They will please to believe that nothing in
+this wise was changed by the fulfilment of our Saviour’s mission upon
+earth; and further, that what Saint Paul did, can be done again, and has
+been done again. As this is not much to begin with, they will throw in
+at this point rejection of Faraday and Brewster, and “poor Paley”, and
+implicit acceptance of those shining lights, the Reverend Charles
+Beecher, and the Reverend Henry Ward Beecher (“one of the most vigorous
+and eloquent preachers of America”), and the Reverend Adin Ballou.
+
+Having thus cleared the way for a healthy exercise of faith, our
+advancing readers will next proceed especially to believe in the old
+story of the Drummer of Tedworth, in the inspiration of George Fox, in
+“the spiritualism, prophecies, and provision” of Huntington the
+coal-porter (him who prayed for the leather breeches which miraculously
+fitted him), and even in the Cock Lane Ghost. They will please wind up,
+before fetching their breath, with believing that there is a close
+analogy between rejection of any such plain and proved facts as those
+contained in the whole foregoing catalogue, and the opposition
+encountered by the inventors of railways, lighting by gas, microscopes
+and telescopes, and vaccination. This stinging consideration they will
+always carry rankling in their remorseful hearts as they advance.
+
+As touching the Cock Lane Ghost, our conscience-stricken readers will
+please particularly to reproach themselves for having ever supposed that
+important spiritual manifestation to have been a gross imposture which
+was thoroughly detected. They will please to believe that Dr. Johnson
+believed in it, and that, in Mr. Howitt’s words, he “appears to have had
+excellent reasons for his belief”. With a view to this end, the faithful
+will be so good as to obliterate from their Boswells the following
+passage: “Many of my readers, I am convinced, are to this hour under an
+impression that Johnson was thus foolishly deceived. It will therefore
+surprise them a good deal when they are informed upon undoubted authority
+that Johnson was one of those by whom the imposture was detected. The
+story had become so popular, that he thought it should be investigated,
+and in this research he was assisted by the Rev. Dr. Douglas, now Bishop
+of Salisbury, the great detector of impostures”—and therefore
+tremendously obnoxious to Mr. Howitt—“who informs me that after the
+gentlemen who went and examined into the evidence were satisfied of its
+falsity, Johnson wrote in their presence an account of it, which was
+published in the newspapers and _Gentleman’s Magazine_, and undeceived
+the world”. But as there will still remain another highly inconvenient
+passage in the Boswells of the true believers, they must likewise be at
+the trouble of cancelling the following also, referring to a later time:
+“He (Johnson) expressed great indignation at the imposture of the Cock
+Lane Ghost, and related with much satisfaction how he had assisted in
+detecting the cheat, and had published an account of it in the
+newspapers”.
+
+They will next believe (if they be, in the words of Captain Bobadil, “so
+generously minded”) in the transatlantic trance-speakers “who professed
+to speak from direct inspiration”, Mrs. Cora Hatch, Mrs. Henderson, and
+Miss Emma Hardinge; and they will believe in those eminent ladies having
+“spoken on Sundays to five hundred thousand hearers”—small audiences, by
+the way, compared with the intelligent concourse recently assembled in
+the city of New York, to do honour to the Nuptials of General the
+Honourable T. Barnum Thumb. At about this stage of their spiritual
+education they may take the opportunity of believing in “letters from a
+distinguished gentleman of New York, in which the frequent appearance of
+the gentleman’s deceased wife and of Dr. Franklin, to him and other
+well-known friends, are unquestionably unequalled in the annals of the
+marvellous”. Why these modest appearances should seem at all out of the
+common way to Mr. Howitt (who would be in a state of flaming indignation
+if we thought them so), we could not imagine, until we found on reading
+further, “it is solemnly stated that the witnesses have not only seen but
+touched these spirits, and handled the clothes and hair of Franklin”.
+Without presuming to go Mr. Howitt’s length of considering this by any
+means a marvellous experience, we yet venture to confess that it has
+awakened in our mind many interesting speculations touching the present
+whereabout in space, of the spirits of Mr. Howitt’s own departed boots
+and hats.
+
+The next articles of belief are Belief in the moderate figures of “thirty
+thousand media in the United States in 1853”; and in two million five
+hundred thousand spiritualists in the same country of composed minds, in
+1855, “professing to have arrived at their convictions of spiritual
+communication from personal experience”; and in “an average rate of
+increase of three hundred thousand per annum”, still in the same country
+of calm philosophers. Belief in spiritual knockings, in all manner of
+American places, and, among others, in the house of “a Doctor Phelps at
+Stratford, Connecticut, a man of the highest character for intelligence”,
+says Mr. Howitt, and to whom we willingly concede the possession of far
+higher intelligence than was displayed by his spiritual knocker, in
+“frequently cutting to pieces the clothes of one of his boys”, and in
+breaking “seventy-one panes of glass”—unless, indeed, the knocker, when
+in the body, was connected with the tailoring and glazing interests.
+Belief in immaterial performers playing (in the dark though: they are
+obstinate about its being in the dark) on material instruments of wood,
+catgut, brass, tin, and parchment. Your belief is further requested in
+“the Kentucky Jerks”. The spiritual achievements thus euphoniously
+denominated “appear”, says Mr. Howitt, “to have been of a very disorderly
+kind”. It appears that a certain Mr. Doke, a Presbyterian clergyman,
+“was first seized by the jerks”, and the jerks laid hold of Mr. Doke in
+that unclerical way and with that scant respect for his cloth, that they
+“twitched him about in a most extraordinary manner, often when in the
+pulpit, and caused him to shout aloud, and run out of the pulpit into the
+woods, screaming like a madman. When the fit was over, he returned
+calmly to his pulpit and finished the service.” The congregation having
+waited, we presume, and edified themselves with the distant bellowings of
+Doke in the woods, until he came back again, a little warm and hoarse,
+but otherwise in fine condition. “People were often seized at hotels,
+and at table would, on lifting a glass to drink, jerk the liquor to the
+ceiling; ladies would at the breakfast-table suddenly be compelled to
+throw aloft their coffee, and frequently break the cup and saucer.” A
+certain venturesome clergyman vowed that he would preach down the Jerks,
+“but he was seized in the midst of his attempt, and made so ridiculous
+that he withdrew himself from further notice”—an example much to be
+commended. That same favoured land of America has been particularly
+favoured in the development of “innumerable mediums”, and Mr. Howitt
+orders you to believe in Daniel Dunglas Home, Andrew Davis Jackson, and
+Thomas L. Harris, as “the three most remarkable, or most familiar, on
+this side of the Atlantic”. Concerning Mr. Home, the articles of belief
+(besides removal of furniture) are, That through him raps have been given
+and communications made from deceased friends. That “his hand has been
+seized by spirit influence, and rapid communications written out, of a
+surprising character to those to whom they were addressed”. That at his
+bidding, “spirit hands have appeared which have been seen, felt, and
+recognised frequently, by persons present, as those of deceased friends”.
+That he has been frequently lifted up and carried, floating “as it were”
+through a room, near the ceiling. That in America, “all these phenomena
+have displayed themselves in greater force than here”—which we have not
+the slightest doubt of. That he is “the planter of spiritualism all over
+Europe”. That “by circumstances that no man could have devised, he
+became the guest of the Emperor of the French, of the King of Holland, of
+the Czar of Russia, and of many lesser princes”. That he returned from
+“this unpremeditated missionary tour”, “endowed with competence”; but not
+before, “at the Tuileries, on one occasion when the emperor, empress, a
+distinguished lady, and himself only were sitting at table, a hand
+appeared, took up a pen, and wrote, in a strong and well-known character,
+the word Napoleon. The hand was then successively presented to the
+several personages of the party to kiss.” The stout believer, having
+disposed of Mr. Home, and rested a little, will then proceed to believe
+in Andrew Davis Jackson, or Andrew Jackson Davis (Mr. Howitt, having no
+Medium at hand to settle this difference and reveal the right name of the
+seer, calls him by both names), who merely “beheld all the essential
+natures of things, saw the interior of men and animals, as perfectly as
+their exterior; and described them in language so correct, that the most
+able technologists could not surpass him. He pointed out the proper
+remedies for all the complaints, and the shops where they were to be
+obtained”;—in the latter respect appearing to hail from an advertising
+circle, as we conceive. It was also in this gentleman’s limited
+department to “see the metals in the earth”, and to have “the most
+distant regions and their various productions present before him”.
+Having despatched this tough case, the believer will pass on to Thomas L.
+Harris, and will swallow _him_ easily, together with “whole epics” of his
+composition; a certain work “of scarcely less than Miltonic grandeur”,
+called The Lyric of the Golden Age—a lyric pretty nigh as long as one of
+Mr. Howitt’s volumes—dictated by Mr. (not Mrs.) Harris to the publisher
+in ninety-four hours; and several extempore sermons, possessing the
+remarkably lucid property of being “full, unforced, out-gushing,
+unstinted, and absorbing”. The candidate for examination in pure belief,
+will then pass on to the spirit-photography department; this, again, will
+be found in so-favoured America, under the superintendence of Medium
+Mumler, a photographer of Boston: who was “astonished” (though, on Mr.
+Howitt’s showing, he surely ought not to have been) “on taking a
+photograph of himself, to find also by his side the figure of a young
+girl, which he immediately recognised as that of a deceased relative.
+The circumstance made a great excitement. Numbers of persons rushed to
+his rooms, and many have found deceased friends photographed with
+themselves.” (Perhaps Mr. Mumler, too, may become “endowed with
+competence” in time. Who knows?) Finally, the true believers in the
+gospel according to Howitt, have, besides, but to pin their faith on
+“ladies who see spirits habitually”, on ladies who _know_ they have a
+tendency to soar in the air on sufficient provocation, and on a few other
+gnats to be taken after their camels, and they shall be pronounced by Mr.
+Howitt not of the stereotyped class of minds, and not partakers of “the
+astonishing ignorance of the press”, and shall receive a first-class
+certificate of merit.
+
+But before they pass through this portal into the Temple of Serene
+Wisdom, we, halting blind and helpless on the steps, beg to suggest to
+them what they must at once and for ever disbelieve. They must
+disbelieve that in the dark times, when very few were versed in what are
+now the mere recreations of Science, and when those few formed a
+priesthood-class apart, any marvels were wrought by the aid of concave
+mirrors and a knowledge of the properties of certain odours and gases,
+although the self-same marvels could be reproduced before their eyes at
+the Polytechnic Institution, Regent Street, London, any day in the year.
+They must by no means believe that Conjuring and Ventriloquism are old
+trades. They must disbelieve all Philosophical Transactions containing
+the records of painful and careful inquiry into now familiar disorders of
+the senses of seeing and hearing, and into the wonders of somnambulism,
+epilepsy, hysteria, miasmatic influence, vegetable poisons derived by
+whole communities from corrupted air, diseased imitation, and moral
+infection. They must disbelieve all such awkward leading cases as the
+case of the Woodstock Commissioners and their man, and the case of the
+Identity of the Stockwell Ghost, with the maid-servant. They must
+disbelieve the vanishing of champion haunted houses (except, indeed, out
+of Mr. Howitt’s book), represented to have been closed and ruined for
+years, before one day’s inquiry by four gentlemen associated with this
+journal, and one hour’s reference to the Local Rate-books. They must
+disbelieve all possibility of a human creature on the last verge of the
+dark bridge from Life to Death, being mysteriously able, in occasional
+cases, so to influence the mind of one very near and dear, as vividly to
+impress that mind with some disturbed sense of the solemn change
+impending. They must disbelieve the possibility of the lawful existence
+of a class of intellects which, humbly conscious of the illimitable power
+of GOD and of their own weakness and ignorance, never deny that He can
+cause the souls of the dead to revisit the earth, or that He may have
+caused the souls of the dead to revisit the earth, or that He can cause
+any awful or wondrous thing to be; but to deny the likelihood of
+apparitions or spirits coming here upon the stupidest of bootless
+errands, and producing credentials tantamount to a solicitation of our
+vote and interest and next proxy, to get them into the Asylum for Idiots.
+They must disbelieve the right of Christian people who do _not_ protest
+against Protestantism, but who hold it to be a barrier against the
+darkest superstitions that can enslave the soul, to guard with jealousy
+all approaches tending down to Cock Lane Ghosts and suchlike infamous
+swindles, widely degrading when widely believed in; and they must
+disbelieve that such people have the right to know, and that it is their
+duty to know, wonder-workers by their fruits, and to test miracle-mongers
+by the tests of probability, analogy, and common sense. They must
+disbelieve all rational explanations of thoroughly proved experiences
+(only) which appear supernatural, derived from the average experience and
+study of the visible world. They must disbelieve the speciality of the
+Master and the Disciples, and that it is a monstrosity to test the
+wonders of show-folk by the same touchstone. Lastly, they must
+disbelieve that one of the best accredited chapters in the history of
+mankind is the chapter that records the astonishing deceits continually
+practised, with no object or purpose but the distorted pleasure of
+deceiving.
+
+We have summed up a few—not nearly all—of the articles of belief and
+disbelief to which Mr. Howitt most arrogantly demands an implicit
+adherence. To uphold these, he uses a book as a Clown in a Pantomime
+does, and knocks everybody on the head with it who comes in his way.
+Moreover, he is an angrier personage than the Clown, and does not
+experimentally try the effect of his red-hot poker on your shins, but
+straightway runs you through the body and soul with it. He is always
+raging to tell you that if you are not Howitt, you are Atheist and
+Anti-Christ. He is the sans-culotte of the Spiritual Revolution, and
+will not hear of your accepting this point and rejecting that;—down your
+throat with them all, one and indivisible, at the point of the pike; No
+Liberty, Totality, Fraternity, or Death!
+
+Without presuming to question that “it is high time to protest against
+Protestantism” on such very substantial grounds as Mr. Howitt sets forth,
+we do presume to think that it is high time to protest against Mr.
+Howitt’s spiritualism, as being a little in excess of the peculiar merit
+of Thomas L. Harris’s sermons, and somewhat _too_ “full, out-gushing,
+unstinted, and absorbing”.
+
+
+
+
+THE MARTYR MEDIUM
+
+
+“AFTER the valets, the master!” is Mr. Fechter’s rallying cry in the
+picturesque romantic drama which attracts all London to the Lyceum
+Theatre. After the worshippers and puffers of Mr. Daniel Dunglas Home,
+the spirit medium, comes Mr. Daniel Dunglas Home himself, in one volume.
+And we must, for the honour of Literature, plainly express our great
+surprise and regret that he comes arm-in-arm with such good company as
+Messrs. Longman and Company.
+
+We have already summed up Mr. Home’s demands on the public capacity of
+swallowing, as sounded through the war-denouncing trumpet of Mr. Howitt,
+and it is not our intention to revive the strain as performed by Mr. Home
+on his own melodious instrument. We notice, by the way, that in that
+part of the Fantasia where the hand of the first Napoleon is supposed to
+be reproduced, recognised, and kissed, at the Tuileries, Mr. Home subdues
+the florid effects one might have expected after Mr. Howitt’s execution,
+and brays in an extremely general manner. And yet we observe Mr. Home to
+be in other things very reliant on Mr. Howitt, of whom he entertains as
+gratifying an opinion as Mr. Howitt entertains of him: dwelling on his
+“deep researches into this subject”, and of his “great work now ready for
+the press”, and of his “eloquent and forcible” advocacy, and eke of his
+“elaborate and almost exhaustive work”, which Mr. Home trusts will be
+“extensively read”. But, indeed, it would seem to be the most reliable
+characteristic of the Dear Spirits, though very capricious in other
+particulars, that they always form their circles into what may be
+described, in worldly terms, as A Mutual Admiration and Complimentation
+Company (Limited).
+
+Mr. Home’s book is entitled _Incidents in My Life_. We will extract a
+dozen sample passages from it, as variations on and phrases of harmony
+in, the general strain for the Trumpet, which we have promised not to
+repeat.
+
+
+
+1. MR. HOME IS SUPERNATURALLY NURSED
+
+
+“I cannot remember when first I became subject to the curious phenomena
+which have now for so long attended me, but my aunt and others have told
+me that when I was a baby my cradle was frequently rocked, as if some
+kind guardian spirit was attending me in my slumbers.”
+
+
+
+2. DISRESPECTFUL CONDUCT OF MR. HOME’S AUNT NEVERTHELESS
+
+
+“In her uncontrollable anger she seized a chair and threw it at me.”
+
+
+
+3. PUNISHMENT OF MR. HOME’S AUNT
+
+
+“Upon one occasion as the table was being thus moved about of itself, my
+aunt brought the family Bible, and placing it on the table, said, ‘There,
+that will soon drive the devils away’; but to her astonishment the table
+only moved in a more lively manner, as if pleased to bear such a burden.”
+(We believe this is constantly observed in pulpits and church reading
+desks, which are invariably lively.) “Seeing this she was greatly
+incensed, and determined to stop it, she angrily placed her whole weight
+on the table, and was actually lifted up with it bodily from the floor.”
+
+
+
+4. TRIUMPHANT EFFECT OF THIS DISCIPLINE ON MR. HOME’S AUNT
+
+
+“And she felt it a duty that I should leave her house, and which I did.”
+
+
+
+5. MR. HOME’S MISSION
+
+
+It was communicated to him by the spirit of his mother, in the following
+terms: “Daniel, fear not, my child, God is with you, and who shall be
+against you? Seek to do good: be truthful and truth-loving, and you will
+prosper, my child. Yours is a glorious mission—you will convince the
+infidel, cure the sick, and console the weeping.” It is a coincidence
+that another eminent man, with several missions, heard a voice from the
+Heavens blessing him, when he also was a youth, and saying, “You will be
+rewarded, my son, in time”. This Medium was the celebrated Baron
+Munchausen, who relates the experience in the opening of the second
+chapter of the incidents in _his_ life.
+
+
+
+6. MODEST SUCCESS OF MR. HOME’S MISSION
+
+
+“Certainly these phenomena, whether from God or from the devil, have in
+ten years caused more converts to the great truths of immortality and
+angel communion, with all that flows from these great facts, than all the
+sects in Christendom have made during the same period.”
+
+
+
+7. WHAT THE FIRST COMPOSERS SAY OF THE SPIRIT-MUSIC, TO MR. HOME
+
+
+“As to the music, it has been my good fortune to be on intimate terms
+with some of the first composers of the day, and more than one of them
+have said of such as they have heard, that it is such music as only
+angels could make, and no man could write it.”
+
+These “first composers” are not more particularly named. We shall
+therefore be happy to receive and file at the office of this Journal, the
+testimonials in the foregoing terms of Dr. Sterndale Bennett, Mr. Balfe,
+Mr. Macfarren, Mr. Benedict, Mr. Vincent Wallace, Signor Costa, M. Auber,
+M. Gounod, Signor Rossini, and Signor Verdi. We shall also feel obliged
+to Mr. Alfred Mellon, who is no doubt constantly studying this wonderful
+music, under the Medium’s auspices, if he will note on paper, from
+memory, say a single sheet of the same. Signor Giulio Regondi will then
+perform it, as correctly as a mere mortal can, on the Accordion, at the
+next ensuing concert of the Philharmonic Society; on which occasion the
+before-mentioned testimonials will be conspicuously displayed in the
+front of the orchestra.
+
+
+
+8. MR. HOME’S MIRACULOUS INFANT
+
+
+“On the 26th April, old style, or 8th May, according to our style, at
+seven in the evening, and as the snow was fast falling, our little boy
+was born at the town house, situate on the Gagarines Quay, in St.
+Petersburg, where we were still staying. A few hours after his birth,
+his mother, the nurse, and I heard for several hours the warbling of a
+bird as if singing over him. Also that night, and for two or three
+nights afterwards, a bright starlike light, which was clearly visible
+from the partial darkness of the room, in which there was only a
+night-lamp burning, appeared several times directly I over its head,
+where it remained for some moments, and then slowly moved in the
+direction of the door, where it disappeared. This was also seen by each
+of us at the same time. The light was more condensed than those which
+have been so often seen in my presence upon previous and subsequent
+occasions. It was brighter and more distinctly globular. I do not
+believe that it came through my mediumship, but rather through that of
+the child, who has manifested on several occasions the presence of the
+gift. I do not like to allude to such a matter, but as there are more
+strange things in Heaven and earth than are dreamt of, even in my
+philosophy, I do not feel myself at liberty to omit stating, that during
+the latter part of my wife’s pregnancy, we thought it better that she
+should not join in Séances, because it was found that whenever the
+rappings occurred in the room, a simultaneous movement of the child was
+distinctly felt, perfectly in unison with the sounds. When there were
+three sounds, three movements were felt, and so on, and when five sounds
+were heard, which is generally the call for the alphabet, she felt the
+five internal movements, and she would frequently, when we were mistaken
+in the latter, correct us from what the child indicated.”
+
+We should ask pardon of our readers for sullying our paper with this
+nauseous matter, if without it they could adequately understand what Mr.
+Home’s book is.
+
+
+
+9. CAGLIOSTRO’S SPIRIT CALLS ON MR. HOME
+
+
+Prudently avoiding the disagreeable question of his giving himself, both
+in this state of existence and in his spiritual circle, a name to which
+he never had any pretensions whatever, and likewise prudently suppressing
+any reference to his amiable weakness as a swindler and an infamous
+trafficker in his own wife, the guileless Mr. Balsamo delivered, in a
+“distinct voice”, this distinct celestial utterance—unquestionably
+punctuated in a supernatural manner: “My power was that of a mesmerist,
+but all-misunderstood by those about me, my biographers have even done me
+injustice, but I care not for the untruths of earth”.
+
+
+
+10. ORACULAR STATE OF MR. HOME
+
+
+“After various manifestations, Mr. Home went into the trance, and
+addressing a person present, said, ‘You ask what good are such trivial
+manifestations, such as rapping, table-moving, etc.? God is a better
+judge than we are what is fitted for humanity, immense results may spring
+from trivial things. The steam from a kettle is a small thing, but look
+at the locomotive! The electric spark from the back of a cat is a small
+thing, but see the wonders of electricity! The raps are small things,
+but their results will lead you to the Spirit-World, and to eternity!
+Why should great results spring from such small causes? Christ was born
+in a manger, he was not born a King. When you tell me why he was born in
+a manger, I will tell you why these manifestations, so trivial, so
+undignified as they appear to you, have been appointed to convince the
+world of the truth of spiritualism.’”
+
+Wonderful! Clearly direct Inspiration!—And yet, perhaps, hardly worth
+the trouble of going “into the trance” for, either. Amazing as the
+revelation is, we seem to have heard something like it from more than one
+personage who was wide awake. A quack doctor, in an open barouche
+(attended by a barrel-organ and two footmen in brass helmets), delivered
+just such another address within our hearing, outside a gate of Paris,
+not two months ago.
+
+
+
+11. THE TESTIMONY OF MR. HOME’S BOOTS
+
+
+“The lady of the house turned to me and said abruptly, ‘Why, you are
+sitting in the air’; and on looking, we found that the chair remained in
+its place, but that I was elevated two or three inches above it, and my
+feet not touching the floor. This may show how utterly unconscious I am
+at times to the sensation of levitation. As is usual, when I had not got
+above the level of the heads of those about me, and when they change
+their position much—as they frequently do in looking wistfully at such a
+phenomenon—I came down again, but not till I had remained so raised about
+half a minute from the time of its being first seen. I was now impressed
+to leave the table, and was soon carried to the lofty ceiling. The Count
+de B— left his place at the table, and coming under where I was, said,
+‘Now, young Home, come and let me touch your feet.’ I told him I had no
+volition in the matter, but perhaps the spirits would kindly allow me to
+come down to him. They did so, by floating me down to him, and my feet
+were soon in his outstretched hands. He seized my boots, and now I was
+again elevated, he holding tightly, and pulling at my feet, till the
+boots I wore, which had elastic sides, came off and remained in his
+hands.”
+
+
+
+12. THE UNCOMBATIVE NATURE OF MR. HOME
+
+
+As there is a maudlin complaint in this book, about men of Science being
+hard upon “the ‘Orphan’ Home”, and as the “gentle and uncombative nature”
+of this Medium in a martyred point of view is pathetically commented on
+by the anonymous literary friend who supplies him with an introduction
+and appendix—rather at odds with Mr. Howitt, who is so mightily
+triumphant about the same Martyr’s reception by crowned heads, and about
+the competence he has become endowed with—we cull from Mr. Home’s book
+one or two little illustrative flowers. Sir David Brewster (a pestilent
+unbeliever) “has come before the public in few matters which have brought
+more shame upon him than his conduct and assertions on this occasion, in
+which he manifested not only a disregard for truth, but also a disloyalty
+to scientific observation, and to the use of his own eyesight and natural
+faculties”. The same unhappy Sir David Brewster’s “character may be the
+better known, not only for his untruthful dealing with this subject, but
+also in his own domain of science in which the same unfaithfulness to
+truth will be seen to be the characteristic of his mind”. Again, he “is
+really not a man over whom victory is any honour”. Again, “not only he,
+but Professor Faraday have had time and ample leisure to regret that they
+should have so foolishly pledged themselves”, etc. A Faraday a fool in
+the sight of a Home! That unjust judge and whited wall, Lord Brougham,
+has his share of this Martyr Medium’s uncombativeness. “In order that he
+might not be compelled to deny Sir David’s statements, he found it
+necessary that he should be silent, and I have some reason to complain
+that his Lordship preferred sacrificing me to his desire not to immolate
+his friend.” M. Arago also came off with very doubtful honours from a
+wrestle with the uncombative Martyr; who is perfectly clear (and so are
+we, let us add) that scientific men are not the men for his purpose. Of
+course, he is the butt of “utter and acknowledged ignorance”, and of “the
+most gross and foolish statements”, and of “the unjust and dishonest”,
+and of “the press-gang”, and of crowds of other alien and combative
+adjectives, participles, and substantives.
+
+Nothing is without its use, and even this odious book may do some
+service. Not because it coolly claims for the writer and his disciples
+such powers as were wielded by the Saviour and the Apostles; not because
+it sees no difference between twelve table rappers in these days, and
+“twelve fishermen” in those; not because it appeals for precedents to
+statements extracted from the most ignorant and wretched of mankind, by
+cruel torture, and constantly withdrawn when the torture was withdrawn;
+not because it sets forth such a strange confusion of ideas as is
+presented by one of the faithful when, writing of a certain sprig of
+geranium handed by an invisible hand, he adds in ecstasies, “_which we
+have planted and it is growing_, _so that it is no delusion_, _no fairy
+money turned into dross or leaves_”—as if it followed that the conjuror’s
+half-crowns really did become invisible and in that state fly, because he
+afterwards cuts them out of a real orange; or as if the conjuror’s
+pigeon, being after the discharge of his gun, a real live pigeon
+fluttering on the target, must therefore conclusively be a pigeon, fired,
+whole, living and unshattered, out of the gun!—not because of the
+exposure of any of these weaknesses, or a thousand such, are these moving
+incidents in the life of the Martyr Medium, and similar productions,
+likely to prove useful, but because of their uniform abuse of those who
+go to test the reality of these alleged phenomena, and who come away
+incredulous. There is an old homely proverb concerning pitch and its
+adhesive character, which we hope this significant circumstance may
+impress on many minds. The writer of these lines has lately heard
+overmuch touching young men of promise in the imaginative arts, “towards
+whom” Martyr Mediums assisting at evening parties feel themselves
+“drawn”. It may be a hint to such young men to stick to their own
+drawing, as being of a much better kind, and to leave Martyr Mediums
+alone in their glory.
+
+As there is a good deal in these books about “lying spirits”, we will
+conclude by putting a hypothetical case. Supposing that a Medium (Martyr
+or otherwise) were established for a time in the house of an English
+gentleman abroad; say, somewhere in Italy. Supposing that the more
+marvellous the Medium became, the more suspicious of him the lady of the
+house became. Supposing that the lady, her distrust once aroused, were
+particularly struck by the Medium’s exhibiting a persistent desire to
+commit her, somehow or other, to the disclosure of the manner of the
+death, to him unknown, of a certain person. Supposing that she at length
+resolved to test the Medium on this head, and, therefore, on a certain
+evening mentioned a wholly supposititious manner of death (which was not
+the real manner of death, nor anything at all like it) within the range
+of his listening ears. And supposing that a spirit presently afterwards
+rapped out its presence, claiming to be the spirit of that deceased
+person, and claiming to have departed this life in that supposititious
+way. Would that be a lying spirit? Or would it he a something else,
+tainting all that Medium’s statements and suppressions, even if they were
+not in themselves of a manifestly outrageous character?
+
+
+
+
+THE LATE MR. STANFIELD
+
+
+EVERY Artist, be he writer, painter, musician, or actor, must bear his
+private sorrows as he best can, and must separate them from the exercise
+of his public pursuit. But it sometimes happens, in compensation, that
+his private loss of a dear friend represents a loss on the part of the
+whole community. Then he may, without obtrusion of his individuality,
+step forth to lay his little wreath upon that dear friend’s grave.
+
+On Saturday, the eighteenth of this present month, Clarkson Stanfield
+died. On the afternoon of that day, England lost the great marine
+painter of whom she will be boastful ages hence; the National Historian
+of her speciality, the Sea; the man famous in all countries for his
+marvellous rendering of the waves that break upon her shores, of her
+ships and seamen, of her coasts and skies, of her storms and sunshine, of
+the many marvels of the deep. He who holds the oceans in the hollow of
+His hand had given, associated with them, wonderful gifts into his
+keeping; he had used them well through threescore and fourteen years;
+and, on the afternoon of that spring day, relinquished them for ever.
+
+It is superfluous to record that the painter of “The Battle of
+Trafalgar”, of the “_Victory_ being towed into Gibraltar with the body of
+Nelson on Board”, of “The Morning after the Wreck”, of “The Abandoned”,
+of fifty more such works, died in his seventy-fourth year, “Mr.”
+Stanfield.—He was an Englishman.
+
+Those grand pictures will proclaim his powers while paint and canvas
+last. But the writer of these words had been his friend for thirty
+years; and when, a short week or two before his death, he laid that once
+so skilful hand upon the writer’s breast and told him they would meet
+again, “but not here”, the thoughts of the latter turned, for the time,
+so little to his noble genius, and so much to his noble nature!
+
+He was the soul of frankness, generosity, and simplicity. The most
+genial, the most affectionate, the most loving, and the most lovable of
+men. Success had never for an instant spoiled him. His interest in the
+Theatre as an Institution—the best picturesqueness of which may be said
+to be wholly due to him—was faithful to the last. His belief in a Play,
+his delight in one, the ease with which it moved him to tears or to
+laughter, were most remarkable evidences of the heart he must have put
+into his old theatrical work, and of the thorough purpose and sincerity
+with which it must have been done. The writer was very intimately
+associated with him in some amateur plays; and day after day, and night
+after night, there were the same unquenchable freshness, enthusiasm, and
+impressibility in him, though broken in health, even then.
+
+No Artist can ever have stood by his art with a quieter dignity than he
+always did. Nothing would have induced him to lay it at the feet of any
+human creature. To fawn, or to toady, or to do undeserved homage to any
+one, was an absolute impossibility with him. And yet his character was
+so nicely balanced that he was the last man in the world to be suspected
+of self-assertion, and his modesty was one of his most special qualities.
+
+He was a charitable, religious, gentle, truly good man. A genuine man,
+incapable of pretence or of concealment. He had been a sailor once; and
+all the best characteristics that are popularly attributed to sailors,
+being his, and being in him refined by the influences of his Art, formed
+a whole not likely to be often seen. There is no smile that the writer
+can recall, like his; no manner so naturally confiding and so cheerfully
+engaging. When the writer saw him for the last time on earth, the smile
+and the manner shone out once through the weakness, still: the bright
+unchanging Soul within the altered face and form.
+
+No man was ever held in higher respect by his friends, and yet his
+intimate friends invariably addressed him and spoke of him by a pet name.
+It may need, perhaps, the writer’s memory and associations to find in
+this a touching expression of his winning character, his playful smile,
+and pleasant ways. “You know Mrs. Inchbald’s story, Nature and Art?”
+wrote Thomas Hood, once, in a letter: “What a fine Edition of Nature and
+Art is Stanfield!”
+
+Gone! And many and many a dear old day gone with him! But their
+memories remain. And his memory will not soon fade out, for he has set
+his mark upon the restless waters, and his fame will long be sounded in
+the roar of the sea.
+
+
+
+
+A SLIGHT QUESTION OF FACT
+
+
+IT is never well for the public interest that the originator of any
+social reform should be soon forgotten. Further, it is neither wholesome
+nor right (being neither generous nor just) that the merit of his work
+should be gradually transferred elsewhere.
+
+Some few weeks ago, our contemporary, the _Pall Mall Gazette_, in certain
+strictures on our Theatres which we are very far indeed from challenging,
+remarked on the first effectual discouragement of an outrage upon decency
+which the lobbies and upper-boxes of even our best Theatres habitually
+paraded within the last twenty or thirty years. From those remarks it
+might appear as though no such Manager of Covent Garden or Drury Lane as
+Mr. Macready had ever existed.
+
+It is a fact beyond all possibility of question, that Mr. Macready, on
+assuming the management of Covent Garden Theatre in 1837, did instantly
+set himself, regardless of precedent and custom down to that hour
+obtaining, rigidly to suppress this shameful thing, and did rigidly
+suppress and crush it during his whole management of that theatre, and
+during his whole subsequent management of Drury Lane. That he did so, as
+certainly without favour as without fear; that he did so, against his own
+immediate interests; that he did so, against vexations and oppositions
+which might have cooled the ardour of a less earnest man, or a less
+devoted artist; can be better known to no one than the writer of the
+present words, whose name stands at the head of these pages.
+
+
+
+
+LANDOR’S LIFE
+
+
+PREFIXED to the second volume of Mr. Forster’s admirable biography of
+Walter Savage Landor, {519} is an engraving from a portrait of that
+remarkable man when seventy-seven years of age, by Boxall. The writer of
+these lines can testify that the original picture is a singularly good
+likeness, the result of close and subtle observation on the part of the
+painter; but, for this very reason, the engraving gives a most inadequate
+idea of the merit of the picture and the character of the man.
+
+From the engraving, the arms and hands are omitted. In the picture, they
+are, as they were in nature, indispensable to a correct reading of the
+vigorous face. The arms were very peculiar. They were rather short, and
+were curiously restrained and checked in their action at the elbows; in
+the action of the hands, even when separately clenched, there was the
+same kind of pause, and a noticeable tendency to relaxation on the part
+of the thumb. Let the face be never so intense or fierce, there was a
+commentary of gentleness in the hands, essential to be taken along with
+it. Like Hamlet, Landor would speak daggers, but use none. In the
+expression of his hands, though angrily closed, there was always
+gentleness and tenderness; just as when they were open, and the handsome
+old gentleman would wave them with a little courtly flourish that sat
+well upon him, as he recalled some classic compliment that he had
+rendered to some reigning Beauty, there was a chivalrous grace about them
+such as pervades his softer verses. Thus the fictitious Mr. Boythorn (to
+whom we may refer without impropriety in this connexion, as Mr. Forster
+does) declaims “with unimaginable energy” the while his bird is “perched
+upon his thumb”, and he “softly smooths its feathers with his
+forefinger”.
+
+From the spirit of Mr. Forster’s Biography these characteristic hands are
+never omitted, and hence (apart from its literary merits) its great
+value. As the same masterly writer’s _Life and Times of Oliver
+Goldsmith_ is a generous and yet conscientious picture of a period, so
+this is a not less generous and yet conscientious picture of one life; of
+a life, with all its aspirations, achievements, and disappointments; all
+its capabilities, opportunities, and irretrievable mistakes. It is
+essentially a sad book, and herein lies proof of its truth and worth.
+The life of almost any man possessing great gifts, would be a sad book to
+himself; and this book enables us not only to see its subject, but to be
+its subject, if we will.
+
+Mr. Forster is of opinion that “Landor’s fame very surely awaits him”.
+This point admitted or doubted, the value of the book remains the same.
+It needs not to know his works (otherwise than through his biographer’s
+exposition), it needs not to have known himself, to find a deep interest
+in these pages. More or less of their warning is in every conscience;
+and some admiration of a fine genius, and of a great, wild, generous
+nature, incapable of mean self-extenuation or dissimulation—if unhappily
+incapable of self-repression too—should be in every breast. “There may
+be still living many persons”, Walter Landor’s brother, Robert, writes to
+Mr. Forster of this book, “who would contradict any narrative of yours in
+which the best qualities were remembered, the worst forgotten.” Mr.
+Forster’s comment is: “I had not waited for this appeal to resolve, that,
+if this memoir were written at all, it should contain, as far as might
+lie within my power, a fair statement of the truth”. And this eloquent
+passage of truth immediately follows: “Few of his infirmities are without
+something kindly or generous about them; and we are not long in
+discovering there is nothing so wildly incredible that he will not
+himself in perfect good faith believe. When he published his first book
+of poems on quitting Oxford, the profits were to be reserved for a
+distressed clergyman. When he published his Latin poems, the poor of
+Leipzig were to have the sum they realised. When his comedy was ready to
+be acted, a Spaniard who had sheltered him at Castro was to be made
+richer by it. When he competed for the prize of the Academy of
+Stockholm, it was to go to the poor of Sweden. If nobody got anything
+from any one of these enterprises, the fault at all events was not his.
+With his extraordinary power of forgetting disappointments, he was
+prepared at each successive failure to start afresh, as if each had been
+a triumph. I shall have to delineate this peculiarity as strongly in the
+last half as in the first half of his life, and it was certainly an
+amiable one. He was ready at all times to set aside, out of his own
+possessions, something for somebody who might please him for the time;
+and when frailties of temper and tongue are noted, this other
+eccentricity should not be omitted. He desired eagerly the love as well
+as the good opinion of those whom for the time he esteemed, and no one
+was more affectionate while under such influences. It is not a small
+virtue to feel such genuine pleasure, as he always did in giving and
+receiving pleasure. His generosity, too, was bestowed chiefly on those
+who could make small acknowledgment in thanks and no return in kind.”
+
+Some of his earlier contemporaries may have thought him a vain man. Most
+assuredly he was not, in the common acceptation of the term. A vain man
+has little or no admiration to bestow upon competitors. Landor had an
+inexhaustible fund. He thought well of his writings, or he would not
+have preserved them. He said and wrote that he thought well of them,
+because that was his mind about them, and he said and wrote his mind. He
+was one of the few men of whom you might always know the whole: of whom
+you might always know the worst, as well as the best. He had no
+reservations or duplicities. “No, by Heaven!” he would say (“with
+unimaginable energy”), if any good adjective were coupled with him which
+he did not deserve: “I am nothing of the kind. I wish I were; but I
+don’t deserve the attribute, and I never did, and I never shall!” His
+intense consciousness of himself never led to his poorly excusing
+himself, and seldom to his violently asserting himself. When he told
+some little story of his bygone social experiences, in Florence, or where
+not, as he was fond of doing, it took the innocent form of making all the
+interlocutors, Landors. It was observable, too, that they always called
+him “Mr. Landor”—rather ceremoniously and submissively. There was a
+certain “Caro Pádre Abáte Marina”—invariably so addressed in these
+anecdotes—who figured through a great many of them, and who always
+expressed himself in this deferential tone.
+
+Mr. Forster writes of Landor’s character thus:
+
+ “A man must be judged, at first, by what he says and does. But with
+ him such extravagance as I have referred to was little more than the
+ habitual indulgence (on such themes) of passionate feelings and
+ language, indecent indeed but utterly purposeless; the mere explosion
+ of wrath provoked by tyranny or cruelty; the irregularities of an
+ overheated steam-engine too weak for its own vapour. It is very
+ certain that no one could detest oppression more truly than Landor
+ did in all seasons and times; and if no one expressed that scorn,
+ that abhorrence of tyranny and fraud, more hastily or more
+ intemperately, all his fire and fury signified really little else
+ than ill-temper too easily provoked. Not to justify or excuse such
+ language, but to explain it, this consideration is urged. If not
+ uniformly placable, Landor was always compassionate. He was
+ tender-hearted rather than bloody-minded at all times, and upon only
+ the most partial acquaintance with his writings could other opinion
+ be formed. A completer knowledge of them would satisfy any one that
+ he had as little real disposition to kill a king as to kill a mouse.
+ In fact there is not a more marked peculiarity in his genius than the
+ union with its strength of a most uncommon gentleness, and in the
+ personal ways of the man this was equally manifest.”—Vol. i. p. 496.
+
+Of his works, thus:
+
+ “Though his mind was cast in the antique mould, it had opened itself
+ to every kind of impression through a long and varied life; he has
+ written with equal excellence in both poetry and prose, which can
+ hardly be said of any of his contemporaries; and perhaps the single
+ epithet by which his books would be best described is that reserved
+ exclusively for books not characterised only by genius, but also by
+ special individuality. They are unique. Having possessed them, we
+ should miss them. Their place would be supplied by no others. They
+ have that about them, moreover, which renders it almost certain that
+ they will frequently be resorted to in future time. There are none
+ in the language more quotable. Even where impulsiveness and want of
+ patience have left them most fragmentary, this rich compensation is
+ offered to the reader. There is hardly a conceivable subject, in
+ life or literature, which they do not illustrate by striking
+ aphorisms, by concise and profound observations, by wisdom ever
+ applicable to the deeds of men, and by wit as available for their
+ enjoyment. Nor, above all, will there anywhere be found a more
+ pervading passion for liberty, a fiercer hatred of the base, a wider
+ sympathy with the wronged and the oppressed, or help more ready at
+ all times for those who fight at odds and disadvantage against the
+ powerful and the fortunate, than in the writings of Walter Savage
+ Landor.”—Last page of second volume.
+
+The impression was strong upon the present writer’s mind, as on Mr.
+Forster’s, during years of close friendship with the subject of this
+biography, that his animosities were chiefly referable to the singular
+inability in him to dissociate other people’s ways of thinking from his
+own. He had, to the last, a ludicrous grievance (both Mr. Forster and
+the writer have often amused themselves with it) against a good-natured
+nobleman, doubtless perfectly unconscious of having ever given him
+offence. The offence was, that on the occasion of some dinner party in
+another nobleman’s house, many years before, this innocent lord (then a
+commoner) had passed in to dinner, through some door, before him, as he
+himself was about to pass in through that same door with a lady on his
+arm. Now, Landor was a gentleman of most scrupulous politeness, and in
+his carriage of himself towards ladies there was a certain mixture of
+stateliness and deference, belonging to quite another time, and, as Mr.
+Pepys would observe, “mighty pretty to see”. If he could by any effort
+imagine himself committing such a high crime and misdemeanour as that in
+question, he could only imagine himself as doing it of a set purpose,
+under the sting of some vast injury, to inflict a great affront. A
+deliberately designed affront on the part of another man, it therefore
+remained to the end of his days. The manner in which, as time went on,
+he permeated the unfortunate lord’s ancestry with this offence, was
+whimsically characteristic of Landor. The writer remembers very well
+when only the individual himself was held responsible in the story for
+the breach of good breeding; but in another ten years or so, it began to
+appear that his father had always been remarkable for ill manners; and in
+yet another ten years or so, his grandfather developed into quite a
+prodigy of coarse behaviour.
+
+Mr. Boythorn—if he may again be quoted—said of his adversary, Sir
+Leicester Dedlock: “That fellow is, _and his father was_, _and his
+grandfather was_, the most stiff-necked, arrogant, imbecile, pig-headed
+numskull, ever, by some inexplicable mistake of Nature, born in any
+station of life but a walking-stick’s!”
+
+The strength of some of Mr. Landor’s most captivating kind qualities was
+traceable to the same source. Knowing how keenly he himself would feel
+the being at any small social disadvantage, or the being unconsciously
+placed in any ridiculous light, he was wonderfully considerate of shy
+people, or of such as might be below the level of his usual conversation,
+or otherwise out of their element. The writer once observed him in the
+keenest distress of mind in behalf of a modest young stranger who came
+into a drawing-room with a glove on his head. An expressive commentary
+on this sympathetic condition, and on the delicacy with which he advanced
+to the young stranger’s rescue, was afterwards furnished by himself at a
+friendly dinner at Gore House, when it was the most delightful of houses.
+His dress—say, his cravat or shirt-collar—had become slightly disarranged
+on a hot evening, and Count D’Orsay laughingly called his attention to
+the circumstance as we rose from table. Landor became flushed, and
+greatly agitated: “My dear Count D’Orsay, I thank you! My dear Count
+D’Orsay, I thank you from my soul for pointing out to me the abominable
+condition to which I am reduced! If I had entered the Drawing-room, and
+presented myself before Lady Blessington in so absurd a light, I would
+have instantly gone home, put a pistol to my head, and blown my brains
+out!”
+
+Mr. Forster tells a similar story of his keeping a company waiting
+dinner, through losing his way; and of his seeing no remedy for that
+breach of politeness but cutting his throat, or drowning himself, unless
+a countryman whom he met could direct him by a short road to the house
+where the party were assembled. Surely these are expressive notes on the
+gravity and reality of his explosive inclinations to kill kings!
+
+His manner towards boys was charming, and the earnestness of his wish to
+be on equal terms with them and to win their confidence was quite
+touching. Few, reading Mr. Forster’s book, can fall to see in this, his
+pensive remembrance of that “studious wilful boy at once shy and
+impetuous”, who had not many intimacies at Rugby, but who was “generally
+popular and respected, and used his influence often to save the younger
+boys from undue harshness or violence”. The impulsive yearnings of his
+passionate heart towards his own boy, on their meeting at Bath, after
+years of separation, likewise burn through this phase of his character.
+
+But a more spiritual, softened, and unselfish aspect of it, was to
+derived from his respectful belief in happiness which he himself had
+missed. His marriage had not been a felicitous one—it may be fairly
+assumed for either side—but no trace of bitterness or distrust concerning
+other marriages was in his mind. He was never more serene than in the
+midst of a domestic circle, and was invariably remarkable for a perfectly
+benignant interest in young couples and young lovers. That, in his
+ever-fresh fancy, he conceived in this association innumerable histories
+of himself involving far more unlikely events that never happened than
+Isaac D’Israeli ever imagined, is hardly to be doubted; but as to this
+part of his real history he was mute, or revealed his nobleness in an
+impulse to be generously just. We verge on delicate ground, but a slight
+remembrance rises in the writer which can grate nowhere. Mr. Forster
+relates how a certain friend, being in Florence, sent him home a leaf
+from the garden of his old house at Fiesole. That friend had first asked
+him what he should send him home, and he had stipulated for this
+gift—found by Mr. Forster among his papers after his death. The friend,
+on coming back to England, related to Landor that he had been much
+embarrassed, on going in search of the leaf, by his driver’s suddenly
+stopping his horses in a narrow lane, and presenting him (the friend) to
+“La Signora Landora”. The lady was walking alone on a bright
+Italian-winter-day; and the man, having been told to drive to the Villa
+Landora, inferred that he must be conveying a guest or visitor. “I
+pulled off my hat,” said the friend, “apologised for the coachman’s
+mistake, and drove on. The lady was walking with a rapid and firm step,
+had bright eyes, a fine fresh colour, and looked animated and agreeable.”
+Landor checked off each clause of the description, with a stately nod of
+more than ready assent, and replied, with all his tremendous energy
+concentrated into the sentence: “And the Lord forbid that I should do
+otherwise than declare that she always WAS agreeable—to every one but
+_me_!”
+
+Mr. Forster step by step builds up the evidence on which he writes this
+life and states this character. In like manner, he gives the evidence
+for his high estimation of Landor’s works, and—it may be added—for their
+recompense against some neglect, in finding so sympathetic, acute, and
+devoted a champion. Nothing in the book is more remarkable than his
+examination of each of Landor’s successive pieces of writing, his
+delicate discernment of their beauties, and his strong desire to impart
+his own perceptions in this wise to the great audience that is yet to
+come. It rarely befalls an author to have such a commentator: to become
+the subject of so much artistic skill and knowledge, combined with such
+infinite and loving pains. Alike as a piece of Biography, and as a
+commentary upon the beauties of a great writer, the book is a massive
+book; as the man and the writer were massive too. Sometimes, when the
+balance held by Mr. Forster has seemed for a moment to turn a little
+heavily against the infirmities of temperament of a grand old friend, we
+have felt something of a shock; but we have not once been able to gainsay
+the justice of the scales. This feeling, too, has only fluttered out of
+the detail, here or there, and has vanished before the whole. We fully
+agree with Mr. Forster that “judgment has been passed”—as it should
+be—“with an equal desire to be only just on all the qualities of his
+temperament which affected necessarily not his own life only. But, now
+that the story is told, no one will have difficulty in striking the
+balance between its good and ill; and what was really imperishable in
+Landor’s genius will not be treasured less, or less understood, for the
+more perfect knowledge of his character”.
+
+Mr. Forster’s second volume gives a facsimile of Landor’s writing at
+seventy-five. It may be interesting to those who are curious in
+calligraphy, to know that its resemblance to the recent handwriting of
+that great genius, M. Victor Hugo, is singularly strong.
+
+In a military burial-ground in India, the name of Walter Landor is
+associated with the present writer’s over the grave of a young officer.
+No name could stand there, more inseparably associated in the writer’s
+mind with the dignity of generosity: with a noble scorn of all
+littleness, all cruelty, oppression, fraud, and false pretence.
+
+
+
+
+ADDRESS WHICH APPEARED SHORTLY PREVIOUS TO THE COMPLETION OF THE
+TWENTIETH VOLUME (1868), INTIMATING A NEW SERIES OF “ALL THE YEAR ROUND”
+
+
+I BEG to announce to the readers of this Journal, that on the completion
+of the Twentieth Volume on the Twenty-eighth of November, in the present
+year, I shall commence an entirely New Series of _All the Year Round_.
+The change is not only due to the convenience of the public (with which a
+set of such books, extending beyond twenty large volumes, would be quite
+incompatible), but is also resolved upon for the purpose of effecting
+some desirable improvements in respect of type, paper, and size of page,
+which could not otherwise be made. To the Literature of the New Series
+it would not become me to refer, beyond glancing at the pages of this
+Journal, and of its predecessor, through a score of years; inasmuch as my
+regular fellow-labourers and I will be at our old posts, in company with
+those younger comrades, whom I have had the pleasure of enrolling from
+time to time, and whose number it is always one of my pleasantest
+editorial duties to enlarge.
+
+As it is better that every kind of work honestly undertaken and
+discharged, should speak for itself than be spoken for, I will only
+remark further on one intended omission in the New Series. The Extra
+Christmas Number has now been so extensively, and regularly, and often
+imitated, that it is in very great danger of becoming tiresome. I have
+therefore resolved (though I cannot add, willingly) to abolish it, at the
+highest tide of its success.
+
+ CHARLES DICKENS.
+
+
+
+
+FOOTNOTE
+
+
+{519} _Walter Savage Landor_: a Biography, by John Forster, 2 vols.
+Chapman and Hall.
+
+
+
+
+***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONTRIBUTIONS TO ALL THE YEAR
+ROUND***
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+<title>Contributions to All the Year Round, by Charles Dickens</title>
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+
+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Contributions to All the Year Round, by
+Charles Dickens
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
+other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
+whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
+the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
+www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
+to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
+
+
+
+
+Title: Contributions to All the Year Round
+
+
+Author: Charles Dickens
+
+
+
+Release Date: August 20, 2019 [eBook #1464]
+[This file was first posted on July 16, 1998]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII)
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONTRIBUTIONS TO ALL THE YEAR
+ROUND***
+</pre>
+<p>Transcribed from the 1912 Gresham Publishing Company edition
+(<i>Works of Charles Dickens</i>, <i>Volume</i> 19) by David
+Price, email ccx074@pglaf.org</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/cover.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"Book cover"
+title=
+"Book cover"
+ src="images/cover.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<h1>CONTRIBUTIONS<br />
+<span class="GutSmall">TO</span><br />
+<i>All The Year Round</i></h1>
+<p style="text-align: center"><span class="GutSmall">BY</span><br
+/>
+CHARLES DICKENS</p>
+<h2>CONTENTS</h2>
+<table>
+<tr>
+<td><p>&nbsp;</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span
+class="GutSmall">PAGE</span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>Announcement in <i>Household Words</i> of the Approaching
+Publication of <i>All The Year Round</i> (May 28, 1859)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page475">475</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>The Poor Man and his Beer (April 30, 1859)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page477">477</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>Five New Points of Criminal Law (September 24, 1859)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page485">485</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>Leigh Hunt: A Remonstrance (December 24, 1859)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page485">485</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>The Tattlesnivel Bleater (December 31, 1859)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page487">487</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>The Young Man from the Country (March 1, 1862)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page497">497</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>An Enlightened Clergyman (March 8, 1862)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page502">502</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>Rather a Strong Dose (March 21, 1863)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page504">504</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>The Martyr Medium (April 4, 1863)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page510">510</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>The Late Mr. Stanfield (June 1, 1867)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page516">516</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>A Slight Question of Fact (February 13, 1869)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page518">518</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>Landor&rsquo;s Life (July 24, 1869)</p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page519">519</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+<td><p>Address which Appeared Shortly previous to the Completion
+of the Twentieth Volume (1868) intimating a New Series of <i>All
+The Year Round</i></p>
+</td>
+<td><p style="text-align: right"><span class="indexpageno"><a
+href="#page526">526</a></span></p>
+</td>
+</tr>
+</table>
+<h2><a name="page475"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+475</span>ANNOUNCEMENT IN &ldquo;HOUSEHOLD WORDS&rdquo; OF THE
+APPROACHING PUBLICATION OF &ldquo;ALL THE YEAR ROUND&rdquo;</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">After</span> the appearance of the present
+concluding Number of <i>Household Words</i>, this publication
+will merge into the new weekly publication, <i>All the Year
+Round</i>, and the title, <i>Household Words</i>, will form a
+part of the title-page of <i>All the Year Round</i>.</p>
+<p>The Prospectus of the latter Journal describes it in these
+words:</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">&ldquo;ADDRESS</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Nine years of <i>Household Words</i>, are the best
+practical assurance that can be offered to the public, of the
+spirit and objects of <i>All the Year Round</i>.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;In transferring myself, and my strongest energies, from
+the publication that is about to be discontinued, to the
+publication that is about to be begun, I have the happiness of
+taking with me the staff of writers with whom I have laboured,
+and all the literary and business co-operation that can make my
+work a pleasure.&nbsp; In some important respects, I am now free
+greatly to advance on past arrangements.&nbsp; Those, I leave to
+testify for themselves in due course.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;That fusion of the graces of the imagination with the
+realities of life, which is vital to the welfare of any
+community, and for which I have striven from week to week as
+honestly as I could during the last nine years, will continue to
+be striven for &ldquo;all the year round&rdquo;.&nbsp; The old
+weekly cares and duties become things of the Past, merely to be
+assumed, with an increased love for them and brighter hopes
+springing out of them, in the Present and the Future.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;I look, and plan, for a very much wider circle of
+readers, and yet again for a steadily expanding circle of
+readers, in the projects I hope to carry through &ldquo;all the
+year round&rdquo;.&nbsp; And I feel confident that this
+expectation will be realized, if it deserve realization.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;The task of my new journal is set, and it will steadily
+try to work the task out.&nbsp; Its pages shall show to what good
+purpose their motto is remembered in them, and with how much of
+fidelity and earnestness they tell</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">&ldquo;the story of our lives from
+year to year.</p>
+<p style="text-align: right">&ldquo;CHARLES DICKENS.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Since this was issued, the Journal itself has come into
+existence, and has spoken for itself five weeks.&nbsp; Its fifth
+Number is published to-day, and its circulation, moderately
+stated, trebles that now relinquished in <i>Household
+Words</i>.</p>
+<p>In referring our readers, henceforth, to <i>All the Year
+Round</i>, we can but assure them afresh, of our unwearying and
+faithful service, in what is at once the work and the chief
+pleasure of our life.&nbsp; Through all that we are doing, and
+through all that we design to do, our aim is to do our best in
+sincerity of purpose, and true devotion of spirit.</p>
+<p>We do not for a moment suppose that we may lean on the
+character of these pages, and rest contented at the point where
+they stop.&nbsp; We see in that point but a starting-place for
+our new journey; and on that journey, with new prospects opening
+out before us everywhere, we joyfully proceed, entreating our
+readers&mdash;without any of the pain of leave-taking incidental
+to most journeys&mdash;to bear us company All the year round.</p>
+<p><i>Saturday</i>, <i>May</i> 28, 1859.</p>
+<h2><a name="page477"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 477</span>THE
+POOR MAN AND HIS BEER</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">My</span> friend Philosewers and I,
+contemplating a farm-labourer the other day, who was drinking his
+mug of beer on a settle at a roadside ale-house door, we fell to
+humming the fag-end of an old ditty, of which the poor man and
+his beer, and the sin of parting them, form the doleful
+burden.&nbsp; Philosewers then mentioned to me that a friend of
+his in an agricultural county&mdash;say a Hertfordshire
+friend&mdash;had, for two years last past, endeavoured to
+reconcile the poor man and his beer to public morality, by making
+it a point of honour between himself and the poor man that the
+latter should use his beer and not abuse it.&nbsp; Interested in
+an effort of so unobtrusive and unspeechifying a nature, &ldquo;O
+Philosewers,&rdquo; said I, after the manner of the dreary sages
+in Eastern apologues, &ldquo;Show me, I pray, the man who deems
+that temperance can be attained without a medal, an oration, a
+banner, and a denunciation of half the world, and who has at once
+the head and heart to set about it!&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Philosewers expressing, in reply, his willingness to gratify
+the dreary sage, an appointment was made for the purpose.&nbsp;
+And on the day fixed, I, the Dreary one, accompanied by
+Philosewers, went down Nor&rsquo;-West per railway, in search of
+temperate temperance.&nbsp; It was a thunderous day; and the
+clouds were so immoderately watery, and so very much disposed to
+sour all the beer in Hertfordshire, that they seemed to have
+taken the pledge.</p>
+<p>But, the sun burst forth gaily in the afternoon, and gilded
+the old gables, and old mullioned windows, and old weathercock
+and old clock-face, of the quaint old house which is the dwelling
+of the man we sought.&nbsp; How shall I describe him?&nbsp; As
+one of the most famous practical chemists of the age?&nbsp; That
+designation will do as well as another&mdash;better, perhaps,
+than most others.&nbsp; And his name?&nbsp; Friar Bacon.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Though, take notice, Philosewers,&rdquo; said I, behind
+my hand, &ldquo;that the first Friar Bacon had not that handsome
+lady-wife beside him.&nbsp; Wherein, O Philosewers, he was a
+chemist, wretched and forlorn, compared with his successor.&nbsp;
+Young Romeo bade the holy father Lawrence hang up philosophy,
+unless philosophy could make a Juliet.&nbsp; Chemistry would
+infallibly be hanged if its life were staked on making anything
+half so pleasant as this Juliet.&rdquo;&nbsp; The gentle
+Philosewers smiled assent.</p>
+<p>The foregoing whisper from myself, the Dreary one, tickled the
+ear of Philosewers, as we walked on the trim garden terrace
+before dinner, among the early leaves and blossoms; two peacocks,
+apparently in very tight new boots, occasionally crossing the
+gravel at a distance.&nbsp; The sun, shining through the old
+house-windows, now and then flashed out some brilliant piece of
+colour from bright hangings within, or upon the old oak
+panelling; similarly, Friar Bacon, as we paced to and fro,
+revealed little glimpses of his good work.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;It is not much,&rdquo; said he.&nbsp; &ldquo;It is no
+wonderful thing.&nbsp; There used to be a great deal of
+drunkenness here, and I wanted to make it better if I
+could.&nbsp; The people are very ignorant, and have been much
+neglected, and I wanted to make <i>that</i> better, if I
+could.&nbsp; My utmost object was, to help them to a little
+self-government and a little homely pleasure.&nbsp; I only show
+the way to better things, and advise them.&nbsp; I never act for
+them; I never interfere; above all, I never patronise.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>I had said to Philosewers as we came along Nor&rsquo;-West
+that patronage was one of the curses of England; I appeared to
+rise in the estimation of Philosewers when thus confirmed.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;And so,&rdquo; said Friar Bacon, &ldquo;I established
+my Allotment-club, and my pig-clubs, and those little Concerts by
+the ladies of my own family, of which we have the last of the
+season this evening.&nbsp; They are a great success, for the
+people here are amazingly fond of music.&nbsp; But there is the
+early dinner-bell, and I have no need to talk of my endeavours
+when you will soon see them in their working dress&rdquo;.</p>
+<p>Dinner done, behold the Friar, Philosewers, and myself the
+Dreary one, walking, at six o&rsquo;clock, across the fields, to
+the &ldquo;Club-house.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>As we swung open the last field-gate and entered the
+Allotment-grounds, many members were already on their way to the
+Club, which stands in the midst of the allotments.&nbsp; Who
+could help thinking of the wonderful contrast between these
+club-men and the club-men of St. James&rsquo;s Street, or Pall
+Mall, in London!&nbsp; Look at yonder prematurely old man,
+doubled up with work, and leaning on a rude stick more crooked
+than himself, slowly trudging to the club-house, in a shapeless
+hat like an Italian harlequin&rsquo;s, or an old brown-paper bag,
+leathern leggings, and dull green smock-frock, looking as though
+duck-weed had accumulated on it&mdash;the result of its stagnant
+life&mdash;or as if it were a vegetable production, originally
+meant to blow into something better, but stopped somehow.&nbsp;
+Compare him with Old Cousin Feenix, ambling along St.
+James&rsquo;s Street, got up in the style of a couple of
+generations ago, and with a head of hair, a complexion, and a set
+of teeth, profoundly impossible to be believed in by the widest
+stretch of human credulity.&nbsp; Can they both be men and
+brothers?&nbsp; Verily they are.&nbsp; And although Cousin Feenix
+has lived so fast that he will die at Baden-Baden, and although
+this club-man in the frock has lived, ever since he came to
+man&rsquo;s estate, on nine shillings a week, and is sure to die
+in the Union if he die in bed, yet he brought as much into the
+world as Cousin Feenix, and will take as much out&mdash;more, for
+more of him is real.</p>
+<p>A pretty, simple building, the club-house, with a rustic
+colonnade outside, under which the members can sit on wet
+evenings, looking at the patches of ground they cultivate for
+themselves; within, a well-ventilated room, large and lofty,
+cheerful pavement of coloured tiles, a bar for serving out the
+beer, good supply of forms and chairs, and a brave big
+chimney-corner, where the fire burns cheerfully.&nbsp; Adjoining
+this room, another:</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Built for a reading-room,&rdquo; said Friar Bacon;
+&ldquo;but not much used&mdash;yet.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>The dreary sage, looking in through the window, perceiving a
+fixed reading-desk within, and inquiring its use:</p>
+<p>&ldquo;I have Service there,&rdquo; said Friar Bacon.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;They never went anywhere to hear prayers, and of course it
+would be hopeless to help them to be happier and better, if they
+had no religious feeling at all.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;The whole place is very pretty.&rdquo;&nbsp; Thus the
+sage.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;I am glad you think so.&nbsp; I built it for the
+holders of the Allotment-grounds, and gave it them: only
+requiring them to manage it by a committee of their own
+appointing, and never to get drunk there.&nbsp; They never have
+got drunk there.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Yet they have their beer freely?&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;O yes.&nbsp; As much as they choose to buy.&nbsp; The
+club gets its beer direct from the brewer, by the barrel.&nbsp;
+So they get it good; at once much cheaper, and much better, than
+at the public-house.&nbsp; The members take it in turns to be
+steward, and serve out the beer: if a man should decline to serve
+when his turn came, he would pay a fine of twopence.&nbsp; The
+steward lasts, as long as the barrel lasts.&nbsp; When there is a
+new barrel, there is a new steward.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;What a noble fire is roaring up that
+chimney!&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Yes, a capital fire.&nbsp; Every member pays a
+halfpenny a week.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Every member must be the holder of an
+Allotment-garden?&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Yes; for which he pays five shillings a year.&nbsp; The
+Allotments you see about us, occupy some sixteen or eighteen
+acres, and each garden is as large as experience shows one man to
+be able to manage.&nbsp; You see how admirably they are tilled,
+and how much they get off them.&nbsp; They are always working in
+them in their spare hours; and when a man wants a mug of beer,
+instead of going off to the village and the public-house, he puts
+down his spade or his hoe, comes to the club-house and gets it,
+and goes back to his work.&nbsp; When he has done work, he likes
+to have his beer at the club, still, and to sit and look at his
+little crops as they thrive.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;They seem to manage the club very well.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Perfectly well.&nbsp; Here are their own rules.&nbsp;
+They made them.&nbsp; I never interfere with them, except to
+advise them when they ask me.&rdquo;</p>
+<h3>RULES AND REGULATIONS<br />
+<span class="GutSmall">MADE BY THE COMMITTEE</span></h3>
+<p style="text-align: center">From the 21st September, 1857</p>
+<p style="text-align: center"><i>One half-penny per week to be
+paid to the club by each member</i></p>
+<p>1.&mdash;Each member to draw the beer in order, according to
+the number of his allotment; on failing, a forfeit of twopence to
+be paid to the club.</p>
+<p>2.&mdash;The member that draws the beer to pay for the same,
+and bring his ticket up receipted when the subscriptions are
+paid; on failing to do so, a penalty of sixpence to be forfeited
+and paid to the club.</p>
+<p>3.&mdash;The subscriptions and forfeits to be paid at the
+club-room on the last Saturday night of each month.</p>
+<p>4.&mdash;The subscriptions and forfeits to be cleared up every
+quarter; if not, a penalty of sixpence to be paid to the
+club.</p>
+<p>5.&mdash;The member that draws the beer to be at the club-room
+by six o&rsquo;clock every evening, and stay till ten; but in the
+event of no member being there, he may leave at nine; on failing
+so to attend, a penalty of sixpence to be paid to the club.</p>
+<p>6.&mdash;Any member giving beer to a stranger in this
+club-room, excepting to his wife or family, shall be liable to
+the penalty of one shilling.</p>
+<p>7.&mdash;Any member lifting his hand to strike another in this
+club-room shall be liable to the penalty of sixpence.</p>
+<p>8.&mdash;Any member swearing in this club-room shall be liable
+to a penalty of twopence each time.</p>
+<p>9.&mdash;Any member selling beer shall be expelled from the
+club.</p>
+<p>10.&mdash;Any member wishing to give up his allotment, may
+apply to the committee, and they shall value the crop and the
+condition of the ground.&nbsp; The amount of the valuation shall
+be paid by the succeeding tenant, who shall be allowed to enter
+on any part of the allotment which is uncropped at the time of
+notice of the leaving tenant.</p>
+<p>11.&mdash;Any member not keeping his allotment-garden clear
+from seed-weeds, or otherwise injuring his neighbours, may be
+turned out of his garden by the votes of two-thirds of the
+committee, one month&rsquo;s notice being given to him.</p>
+<p>12.&mdash;Any member carelessly breaking a mug, is to pay the
+cost of replacing the same.</p>
+
+<div class="gapspace">&nbsp;</div>
+<p>I was soliciting the attention of Philosewers to some old old
+bonnets hanging in the Allotment-gardens to frighten the birds,
+and the fashion of which I should think would terrify a French
+bird to death at any distance, when Philosewers solicited my
+attention to the scrapers at the club-house door.&nbsp; The
+amount of the soil of England which every member brought there on
+his feet, was indeed surprising; and even I, who am professedly a
+salad-eater, could have grown a salad for my dinner, in the earth
+on any member&rsquo;s frock or hat.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Now,&rdquo; said Friar Bacon, looking at his watch,
+&ldquo;for the Pig-clubs!&rdquo;</p>
+<p>The dreary Sage entreated explanation.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Why, a pig is so very valuable to a poor labouring man,
+and it is so very difficult for him at this time of the year to
+get money enough to buy one, that I lend him a pound for the
+purpose.&nbsp; But, I do it in this way.&nbsp; I leave such of
+the club members as choose it and desire it, to form themselves
+into parties of five.&nbsp; To every man in each company of five,
+I lend a pound, to buy a pig.&nbsp; But, each man of the five
+becomes bound for every other man, as to the repayment of his
+money.&nbsp; Consequently, they look after one another, and pick
+out their partners with care; selecting men in whom they have
+confidence.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;They repay the money, I suppose, when the pig is
+fattened, killed, and sold?&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Yes.&nbsp; Then they repay the money.&nbsp; And they do
+repay it.&nbsp; I had one man, last year, who was a little tardy
+(he was in the habit of going to the public-house); but even he
+did pay.&nbsp; It is an immense Advantage to one of these poor
+fellows to have a pig.&nbsp; The pig consumes the refuse from the
+man&rsquo;s cottage and allotment-garden, and the pig&rsquo;s
+refuse enriches the man&rsquo;s garden besides.&nbsp; The pig is
+the poor man&rsquo;s friend.&nbsp; Come into the club-house
+again.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>The poor man&rsquo;s friend.&nbsp; Yes.&nbsp; I have often
+wondered who really was the poor man&rsquo;s friend among a great
+number of competitors, and I now clearly perceive him to be the
+pig.&nbsp; <i>He</i> never makes any flourishes about the poor
+man.&nbsp; <i>He</i> never gammons the poor man&mdash;except to
+his manifest advantage in the article of bacon.&nbsp; <i>He</i>
+never comes down to this house, or goes down to his
+constituents.&nbsp; He openly declares to the poor man, &ldquo;I
+want my sty because I am a Pig.&nbsp; I desire to have as much to
+eat as you can by any means stuff me with, because I am a
+Pig.&rdquo;&nbsp; <i>He</i> never gives the poor man a sovereign
+for bringing up a family.&nbsp; <i>He</i> never grunts the poor
+man&rsquo;s name in vain.&nbsp; And when he dies in the odour of
+Porkity, he cuts up, a highly useful creature and a blessing to
+the poor man, from the ring in his snout to the curl in his
+tail.&nbsp; Which of the poor man&rsquo;s other friends can say
+as much?&nbsp; Where is the M.P. who means Mere Pork?</p>
+<p>The dreary Sage had glided into these reflections, when he
+found himself sitting by the club-house fire, surrounded by green
+smock-frocks and shapeless hats: with Friar Bacon lively, busy,
+and expert, at a little table near him.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Now, then, come.&nbsp; The first five!&rdquo; said
+Friar Bacon.&nbsp; &ldquo;Where are you?&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Order!&rdquo; cried a merry-faced little man, who had
+brought his young daughter with him to see life, and who always
+modestly hid his face in his beer-mug after he had thus assisted
+the business.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;John Nightingale, William Thrush, Joseph Blackbird,
+Cecil Robin, and Thomas Linnet!&rdquo; cried Friar Bacon.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Here, sir!&rdquo; and &ldquo;Here, sir!&rdquo;&nbsp;
+And Linnet, Robin, Blackbird, Thrush, and Nightingale, stood
+confessed.</p>
+<p>We, the undersigned, declare, in effect, by this written
+paper, that each of us is responsible for the repayment of this
+pig-money by each of the other.&nbsp; &ldquo;Sure you understand,
+Nightingale?&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Ees, sur.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Can you write your name, Nightingale?&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Na, sur.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Nightingale&rsquo;s eye upon his name, as Friar Bacon wrote
+it, was a sight to consider in after years.&nbsp; Rather
+incredulous was Nightingale, with a hand at the corner of his
+mouth, and his head on one side, as to those drawings really
+meaning him.&nbsp; Doubtful was Nightingale whether any virtue
+had gone out of him in that committal to paper.&nbsp; Meditative
+was Nightingale as to what would come of young
+Nightingale&rsquo;s growing up to the acquisition of that
+art.&nbsp; Suspended was the interest of Nightingale, when his
+name was done&mdash;as if he thought the letters were only sown,
+to come up presently in some other form.&nbsp; Prodigious, and
+wrong-handed was the cross made by Nightingale on much
+encouragement&mdash;the strokes directed from him instead of
+towards him; and most patient and sweet-humoured was the smile of
+Nightingale as he stepped back into a general laugh.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Order!&rdquo; cried the little man.&nbsp; Immediately
+disappearing into his mug.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Ralph Mangel, Roger Wurzel, Edward Vetches, Matthew
+Carrot, and Charles Taters!&rdquo; said Friar Bacon.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;All here, sir.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;You understand it, Mangel?&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Iss, sir, I unnerstaans it.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Can you write your name, Mangel?&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Iss, sir.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Breathless interest.&nbsp; A dense background of smock-frocks
+accumulated behind Mangel, and many eyes in it looked doubtfully
+at Friar Bacon, as who should say, &ldquo;Can he really
+though?&rdquo;&nbsp; Mangel put down his hat, retired a little to
+get a good look at the paper, wetted his right hand thoroughly by
+drawing it slowly across his mouth, approached the paper with
+great determination, flattened it, sat down at it, and got well
+to his work.&nbsp; Circuitous and sea-serpent-like, were the
+movements of the tongue of Mangel while he formed the letters;
+elevated were the eyebrows of Mangel and sidelong the eyes, as,
+with his left whisker reposing on his left arm, they followed his
+performance; many were the misgivings of Mangel, and slow was his
+retrospective meditation touching the junction of the letter p
+with h; something too active was the big forefinger of Mangel in
+its propensity to rub out without proved cause.&nbsp; At last,
+long and deep was the breath drawn by Mangel when he laid down
+the pen; long and deep the wondering breath drawn by the
+background&mdash;as if they had watched his walking across the
+rapids of Niagara, on stilts, and now cried, &ldquo;He has done
+it!&rdquo;</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p482b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"Forming the Pig-clubs"
+title=
+"Forming the Pig-clubs"
+ src="images/p482s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>But, Mangel was an honest man, if ever honest man lived.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;T&rsquo;owt to be a hell, sir,&rdquo; said he,
+contemplating his work, &ldquo;and I ha&rsquo; made a t on
+&rsquo;t.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>The over-fraught bosoms of the background found relief in a
+roar of laughter.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Or&mdash;<span class="GutSmall">DER</span>!&rdquo;
+cried the little man.&nbsp; &ldquo;<span
+class="smcap">Cheer</span>!&rdquo;&nbsp; And after that second
+word, came forth from his mug no more.</p>
+<p>Several other clubs signed, and received their money.&nbsp;
+Very few could write their names; all who could not, pleaded that
+they could not, more or less sorrowfully, and always with a shake
+of the head, and in a lower voice than their natural speaking
+voice.&nbsp; Crosses could be made standing; signatures must be
+sat down to.&nbsp; There was no exception to this rule.&nbsp;
+Meantime, the various club-members smoked, drank their beer, and
+talked together quite unrestrained.&nbsp; They all wore their
+hats, except when they went up to Friar Bacon&rsquo;s
+table.&nbsp; The merry-faced little man offered his beer, with a
+natural good-fellowship, both to the Dreary one and
+Philosewers.&nbsp; Both partook of it with thanks.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Seven o&rsquo;clock!&rdquo; said Friar Bacon.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;And now we better get across to the concert, men, for the
+music will be beginning.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>The concert was in Friar Bacon&rsquo;s laboratory; a large
+building near at hand, in an open field.&nbsp; The bettermost
+people of the village and neighbourhood were in a gallery on one
+side, and, in a gallery opposite the orchestra.&nbsp; The whole
+space below was filled with the labouring people and their
+families, to the number of five or six hundred.&nbsp; We had been
+obliged to turn away two hundred to-night, Friar Bacon said, for
+want of room&mdash;and that, not counting the boys, of whom we
+had taken in only a few picked ones, by reason of the boys, as a
+class, being given to too fervent a custom of applauding with
+their boot-heels.</p>
+<p>The performers were the ladies of Friar Bacon&rsquo;s family,
+and two gentlemen; one of them, who presided, a Doctor of
+Music.&nbsp; A piano was the only instrument.&nbsp; Among the
+vocal pieces, we had a negro melody (rapturously encored), the
+Indian Drum, and the Village Blacksmith; neither did we want for
+fashionable Italian, having <i>Ah! non giunge</i>, and <i>Mi
+manca la voce</i>.&nbsp; Our success was splendid; our
+good-humoured, unaffected, and modest bearing, a pattern.&nbsp;
+As to the audience, they were far more polite and far more
+pleased than at the Opera; they were faultless.&nbsp; Thus for
+barely an hour the concert lasted, with thousands of great
+bottles looking on from the walls, containing the results of
+Friar Bacon&rsquo;s Million and one experiments in agricultural
+chemistry; and containing too, no doubt, a variety of materials
+with which the Friar could have blown us all through the roof at
+five minutes&rsquo; notice.</p>
+<p>God save the Queen being done, the good Friar stepped forward
+and said a few words, more particularly concerning two points;
+firstly, that Saturday half-holiday, which it would be kind in
+farmers to grant; secondly, the additional Allotment-grounds we
+were going to establish, in consequence of the happy success of
+the system, but which we could not guarantee should entitle the
+holders to be members of the club, because the present members
+must consider and settle that question for themselves: a bargain
+between man and man being always a bargain, and we having made
+over the club to them as the original Allotment-men.&nbsp; This
+was loudly applauded, and so, with contented and affectionate
+cheering, it was all over.</p>
+<p>As Philosewers, and I the Dreary, posted back to London,
+looking up at the moon and discussing it as a world preparing for
+the habitation of responsible creatures, we expatiated on the
+honour due to men in this world of ours who try to prepare it for
+a higher course, and to leave the race who live and die upon it
+better than they found them.</p>
+<h2><a name="page485"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 485</span>FIVE
+NEW POINTS OF CRIMINAL LAW</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> existing Criminal Law has been
+found in trials for Murder, to be so exceedingly hasty, unfair,
+and oppressive&mdash;in a word, to be so very objectionable to
+the amiable persons accused of that thoughtless act&mdash;that it
+is, we understand, the intention of the Government to bring in a
+Bill for its amendment.&nbsp; We have been favoured with an
+outline of its probable provisions.</p>
+<p>It will be grounded on the profound principle that the real
+offender is the Murdered Person; but for whose obstinate
+persistency in being murdered, the interesting fellow-creature to
+be tried could not have got into trouble.</p>
+<p>Its leading enactments may be expected to resolve themselves
+under the following heads:</p>
+<p>1.&nbsp; There shall be no judge.&nbsp; Strong representations
+have been made by highly popular culprits that the presence of
+this obtrusive character is prejudicial to their best
+interests.&nbsp; The Court will be composed of a political
+gentleman, sitting in a secluded room commanding a view of St.
+James&rsquo;s Park, who has already more to do than any human
+creature can, by any stretch of the human imagination, be
+supposed capable of doing.</p>
+<p>2.&nbsp; The jury to consist of Five Thousand Five Hundred and
+Fifty-five Volunteers.</p>
+<p>3.&nbsp; The jury to be strictly prohibited from seeing either
+the accused or the witnesses.&nbsp; They are not to be
+sworn.&nbsp; They are on no account to hear the evidence.&nbsp;
+They are to receive it, or such representations of it, as may
+happen to fall in their way; and they will constantly write
+letters about it to all the Papers.</p>
+<p>4.&nbsp; Supposing the trial to be a trial for Murder by
+poisoning, and supposing the hypothetical case, or the evidence,
+for the prosecution to charge the administration of two poisons,
+say Arsenic and Antimony; and supposing the taint of Arsenic in
+the body to be possible but not probable, and the presence of
+Antimony in the body, to be an absolute certainty; it will then
+become the duty of the jury to confine their attention solely to
+the Arsenic, and entirely to dismiss the Antimony from their
+minds.</p>
+<p>5.&nbsp; The symptoms preceding the death of the real offender
+(or Murdered Person) being described in evidence by medical
+practitioners who saw them, other medical practitioners who never
+saw them shall be required to state whether they are inconsistent
+with certain known diseases&mdash;but, <i>they shall never be
+asked whether they are not exactly consistent with the
+administration of Poison</i>.&nbsp; To illustrate this enactment
+in the proposed Bill by a case:&mdash;A raging mad dog is seen to
+run into the house where Z lives alone, foaming at the
+mouth.&nbsp; Z and the mad dog are for some time left together in
+that house under proved circumstances, irresistibly leading to
+the conclusion that Z has been bitten by the dog.&nbsp; Z is
+afterwards found lying on his bed in a state of hydrophobia, and
+with the marks of the dog&rsquo;s teeth.&nbsp; Now, the symptoms
+of that disease being identical with those of another disease
+called Tetanus, which might supervene on Z&rsquo;s running a
+rusty nail into a certain part of his foot, medical practitioners
+who never saw Z, shall bear testimony to that abstract fact, and
+it shall then be incumbent on the Registrar-General to certify
+that Z died of a rusty nail.</p>
+<p>It is hoped that these alterations in the present mode of
+procedure will not only be quite satisfactory to the accused
+person (which is the first great consideration), but will also
+tend, in a tolerable degree, to the welfare and safety of
+society.&nbsp; For it is not sought in this moderate and prudent
+measure to be wholly denied that it is an inconvenience to
+Society to be poisoned overmuch.</p>
+<h2><a name="page487"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+487</span>LEIGH HUNT: A REMONSTRANCE</h2>
+<p>&ldquo;<span class="smcap">The</span> sense of beauty and
+gentleness, of moral beauty and faithful gentleness, grew upon
+him as the clear evening closed in.&nbsp; When he went to visit
+his relative at Putney, he still carried with him his work, and
+the books he more immediately wanted.&nbsp; Although his bodily
+powers had been giving way, his most conspicuous qualities, his
+memory for books, and his affection remained; and when his hair
+was white, when his ample chest had grown slender, when the very
+proportion of his height had visibly lessened, his step was still
+ready, and his dark eyes brightened at every happy expression,
+and at every thought of kindness.&nbsp; His death was simply
+exhaustion; he broke off his work to lie down and repose.&nbsp;
+So gentle was the final approach, that he scarcely recognised it
+till the very last, and then it came without terrors.&nbsp; His
+physical suffering had not been severe; at the latest hour he
+said that his only uneasiness was failing breath.&nbsp; And that
+failing breath was used to express his sense of the inexhaustible
+kindness he had received from the family who had been so
+unexpectedly made his nurses,&mdash;to draw from one of his sons,
+by minute, eager, and searching questions, all that he could
+learn about the latest vicissitudes and growing hopes of
+Italy,&mdash;to ask the friends and children around him for news
+of those whom he loved,&mdash;and to send love and messages to
+the absent who loved him.&rdquo;</p>
+
+<div class="gapspace">&nbsp;</div>
+<p>Thus, with a manly simplicity and filial affection, writes the
+eldest son of Leigh Hunt in recording his father&rsquo;s
+death.&nbsp; These are the closing words of a new edition of
+<i>The Autobiography of Leigh Hunt</i>, published by Messrs.
+Smith and Elder, of Cornhill, revised by that son, and enriched
+with an introductory chapter of remarkable beauty and
+tenderness.&nbsp; The son&rsquo;s first presentation of his
+father to the reader, &ldquo;rather tall, straight as an arrow,
+looking slenderer than he really was; his hair black and shining,
+and slightly inclined to wave; his head high, his forehead
+straight and white, his eyes black and sparkling, his general
+complexion dark; in his whole carriage and manner an
+extraordinary degree of life,&rdquo; completes the picture.&nbsp;
+It is the picture of the flourishing and fading away of man that
+is born of a woman and hath but a short time to live.</p>
+<p>In his presentation of his father&rsquo;s moral nature and
+intellectual qualities, Mr. Hunt is no less faithful and no less
+touching.&nbsp; Those who knew Leigh Hunt, will see the bright
+face and hear the musical voice again, when he is recalled to
+them in this passage: &ldquo;Even at seasons of the greatest
+depression in his fortunes, he always attracted many visitors,
+but still not so much for any repute that attended him as for his
+personal qualities.&nbsp; Few men were more attractive, in
+society, whether in a large company or over the fireside.&nbsp;
+His manners were peculiarly animated; his conversation, varied,
+ranging over a great field of subjects, was moved and called
+forth by the response of his companion, be that companion
+philosopher or student, sage or boy, man or woman; and he was
+equally ready for the most lively topics or for the gravest
+reflections&mdash;his expression easily adapting itself to the
+tone of his companion&rsquo;s mind.&nbsp; With much freedom of
+manners, he combined a spontaneous courtesy that never failed,
+and a considerateness derived from a ceaseless kindness of heart
+that invariably fascinated even strangers.&rdquo;&nbsp; Or in
+this: &ldquo;His animation, his sympathy with what was gay and
+pleasurable; his avowed doctrine of cultivating cheerfulness,
+were manifest on the surface, and could be appreciated by those
+who knew him in society, most probably even exaggerated as
+salient traits, on which he himself insisted <i>with a sort of
+gay and ostentatious wilfulness</i>.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>The last words describe one of the most captivating
+peculiarities of a most original and engaging man, better than
+any other words could.&nbsp; The reader is besought to observe
+them, for a reason that shall presently be given.&nbsp; Lastly:
+&ldquo;The anxiety to recognise the right of others, the tendency
+to &lsquo;refine&rsquo;, which was noted by an early school
+companion, and the propensity to elaborate every thought, made
+him, along with the direct argument by which he sustained his own
+conviction, recognise and almost admit all that might be said on
+the opposite side&rdquo;.&nbsp; For these reasons, and for others
+suggested with equal felicity, and with equal fidelity, the son
+writes of the father, &ldquo;It is most desirable that his
+qualities should be known as they were; for such deficiencies as
+he had are the honest explanation of his mistakes; while, as the
+reader may see from his writings and his conduct, they are not,
+as the faults of which he was accused would be, incompatible with
+the noblest faculties both of head and heart.&nbsp; To know Leigh
+Hunt as he was, was to hold him in reverence and love.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>These quotations are made here, with a special object.&nbsp;
+It is not, that the personal testimony of one who knew Leigh Hunt
+well, may be borne to their truthfulness.&nbsp; It is not, that
+it may be recorded in these pages, as in his son&rsquo;s
+introductory chapter, that his life was of the most amiable and
+domestic kind, that his wants were few, that his way of life was
+frugal, that he was a man of small expenses, no ostentations, a
+diligent labourer, and a secluded man of letters.&nbsp; It is
+not, that the inconsiderate and forgetful may be reminded of his
+wrongs and sufferings in the days of the Regency, and of the
+national disgrace of his imprisonment.&nbsp; It is not, that
+their forbearance may be entreated for his grave, in right of his
+graceful fancy or his political labours and endurances,
+though&mdash;</p>
+<blockquote><p>Not only we, the latest seed of Time,<br />
+New men, that in the flying of a wheel<br />
+Cry down the past, not only we, that prate<br />
+Of rights and wrongs, have loved the people well.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<p>It is, that a duty may be done in the most direct way
+possible.&nbsp; An act of plain, clear duty.</p>
+<p>Four or five years ago, the writer of these lines was much
+pained by accidentally encountering a printed statement,
+&ldquo;that Mr. Leigh Hunt was the original of Harold Skimpole in
+<i>Bleak House</i>&rdquo;.&nbsp; The writer of these lines, is
+the author of that book.&nbsp; The statement came from
+America.&nbsp; It is no disrespect to that country, in which the
+writer has, perhaps, as many friends and as true an interest as
+any man that lives, good-humouredly to state the fact, that he
+has, now and then, been the subject of paragraphs in
+Transatlantic newspapers, more surprisingly destitute of all
+foundation in truth than the wildest delusions of the wildest
+lunatics.&nbsp; For reasons born of this experience, he let the
+thing go by.</p>
+<p>But, since Mr. Leigh Hunt&rsquo;s death, the statement has
+been revived in England.&nbsp; The delicacy and generosity
+evinced in its revival, are for the rather late consideration of
+its revivers.&nbsp; The fact is this:</p>
+<p>Exactly those graces and charms of manner which are remembered
+in the words we have quoted, were remembered by the author of the
+work of fiction in question, when he drew the character in
+question.&nbsp; Above all other things, that &ldquo;sort of gay
+and ostentatious wilfulness&rdquo; in the humouring of a subject,
+which had many a time delighted him, and impressed him as being
+unspeakably whimsical and attractive, was the airy quality he
+wanted for the man he invented.&nbsp; Partly for this reason, and
+partly (he has since often grieved to think) for the pleasure it
+afforded him to find that delightful manner reproducing itself
+under his hand, he yielded to the temptation of too often making
+the character <i>speak</i> like his old friend.&nbsp; He no more
+thought, God forgive him! that the admired original would ever be
+charged with the imaginary vices of the fictitious creature, than
+he has himself ever thought of charging the blood of Desdemona
+and Othello, on the innocent Academy model who sat for
+Iago&rsquo;s leg in the picture.&nbsp; Even as to the mere
+occasional manner, he meant to be so cautious and conscientious,
+that he privately referred the proof sheets of the first number
+of that book to two intimate literary friends of Leigh Hunt (both
+still living), and altered the whole of that part of the text on
+their discovering too strong a resemblance to his
+&ldquo;way&rdquo;.</p>
+<p>He cannot see the son lay this wreath on the father&rsquo;s
+tomb, and leave him to the possibility of ever thinking that the
+present words might have righted the father&rsquo;s memory and
+were left unwritten.&nbsp; He cannot know that his own son may
+have to explain his father when folly or malice can wound his
+heart no more, and leave this task undone.</p>
+<h2><a name="page490"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 490</span>THE
+TATTLESNIVEL BLEATER</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> pen is taken in hand on the
+present occasion, by a private individual (not wholly
+unaccustomed to literary composition), for the exposure of a
+conspiracy of a most frightful nature; a conspiracy which, like
+the deadly Upas-tree of Java, on which the individual produced a
+poem in his earlier youth (not wholly devoid of length), which
+was so flatteringly received (in circles not wholly unaccustomed
+to form critical opinions), that he was recommended to publish
+it, and would certainly have carried out the suggestion, but for
+private considerations (not wholly unconnected with expense).</p>
+<p>The individual who undertakes the exposure of the gigantic
+conspiracy now to be laid bare in all its hideous deformity, is
+an inhabitant of the town of Tattlesnivel&mdash;a lowly
+inhabitant, it may be, but one who, as an Englishman and a man,
+will ne&rsquo;er abase his eye before the gaudy and the mocking
+throng.</p>
+<p>Tattlesnivel stoops to demand no championship from her
+sons.&nbsp; On an occasion in History, our bluff British monarch,
+our Eighth Royal Harry, almost went there.&nbsp; And long ere the
+periodical in which this exposure will appear, had sprung into
+being, Tattlesnivel had unfurled that standard which yet waves
+upon her battlements.&nbsp; The standard alluded to, is <span
+class="smcap">The Tattlesnivel Bleater</span>, containing the
+latest intelligence, and state of markets, down to the hour of
+going to press, and presenting a favourable local medium for
+advertisers, on a graduated scale of charges, considerably
+diminishing in proportion to the guaranteed number of
+insertions.</p>
+<p>It were bootless to expatiate on the host of talent engaged in
+formidable phalanx to do fealty to the Bleater.&nbsp; Suffice it
+to select, for present purposes, one of the most gifted and (but
+for the wide and deep ramifications of an un-English conspiracy)
+most rising, of the men who are bold Albion&rsquo;s pride.&nbsp;
+It were needless, after this preamble, to point the finger more
+directly at the <span class="smcap">London Correspondent of the
+Tattlesnivel Bleater</span>.</p>
+<p>On the weekly letters of that Correspondent, on the
+flexibility of their English, on the boldness of their grammar,
+on the originality of their quotations (never to be found as they
+are printed, in any book existing), on the priority of their
+information, on their intimate acquaintance with the secret
+thoughts and unexecuted intentions of men, it would ill become
+the humble Tattlesnivellian who traces these words, to
+dwell.&nbsp; They are graven in the memory; they are on the
+Bleater&rsquo;s file.&nbsp; Let them be referred to.</p>
+<p>But from the infamous, the dark, the subtle conspiracy which
+spreads its baleful roots throughout the land, and of which the
+Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent is the one sole subject, it
+is the purpose of the lowly Tattlesnivellian who undertakes this
+revelation, to tear the veil.&nbsp; Nor will he shrink from his
+self-imposed labour, Herculean though it be.</p>
+<p>The conspiracy begins in the very Palace of the Sovereign Lady
+of our Ocean Isle.&nbsp; Leal and loyal as it is the proud vaunt
+of the Bleater&rsquo;s readers, one and all, to be, the
+inhabitant who pens this exposure does not personally impeach,
+either her Majesty the queen, or the illustrious Prince
+Consort.&nbsp; But, some silken-clad smoothers, some purple
+parasites, some fawners in frippery, some greedy and begartered
+ones in gorgeous garments, he does impeach&mdash;ay, and
+wrathfully!&nbsp; Is it asked on what grounds?&nbsp; They shall
+be stated.</p>
+<p>The Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent, in the prosecution
+of his important inquiries, goes down to Windsor, sends in his
+card, has a confidential interview with her Majesty and the
+illustrious Prince Consort.&nbsp; For a time, the restraints of
+Royalty are thrown aside in the cheerful conversation of the
+Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent, in his fund of information,
+in his flow of anecdote, in the atmosphere of his genius; her
+Majesty brightens, the illustrious Prince Consort thaws, the
+cares of State and the conflicts of Party are forgotten, lunch is
+proposed.&nbsp; Over that unassuming and domestic table, her
+Majesty communicates to the Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent
+that it is her intention to send his Royal Highness the Prince of
+Wales to inspect the top of the Great Pyramid&mdash;thinking it
+likely to improve his acquaintance with the views of the
+people.&nbsp; Her Majesty further communicates that she has made
+up her royal mind (and that the Prince Consort has made up his
+illustrious mind) to the bestowal of the vacant Garter, let us
+say on Mr. Roebuck.&nbsp; The younger Royal children having been
+introduced at the request of the Bleater&rsquo;s London
+Correspondent, and having been by him closely observed to present
+the usual external indications of good health, the happy knot is
+severed, with a sigh the Royal bow is once more strung to its
+full tension, the Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent returns to
+London, writes his letter, and tells the Tattlesnivel Bleater
+what he knows.&nbsp; All Tattlesnivel reads it, and knows that he
+knows it.&nbsp; But, <i>does</i> his Royal Highness the Prince of
+Wales ultimately go to the top of the Great Pyramid?&nbsp;
+<i>Does</i> Mr. Roebuck ultimately get the Garter?&nbsp;
+No.&nbsp; Are the younger Royal children even ultimately found to
+be well?&nbsp; On the contrary, they have&mdash;and on that very
+day had&mdash;the measles.&nbsp; Why is this?&nbsp; <i>Because
+the conspirators against the Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent
+have stepped in with their dark machinations</i>.&nbsp; Because
+her Majesty and the Prince Consort are artfully induced to change
+their minds, from north to south, from east to west, immediately
+after it is known to the conspirators that they have put
+themselves in communication with the Bleater&rsquo;s London
+Correspondent.&nbsp; It is now indignantly demanded, by whom are
+they so tampered with?&nbsp; It is now indignantly demanded, who
+took the responsibility of concealing the indisposition of those
+Royal children from their Royal and illustrious parents, and of
+bringing them down from their beds, disguised, expressly to
+confound the London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel
+Bleater?&nbsp; Who are those persons, it is again asked?&nbsp;
+Let not rank and favour protect them.&nbsp; Let the traitors be
+exhibited in the face of day!</p>
+<p>Lord John Russell is in this conspiracy.&nbsp; Tell us not
+that his Lordship is a man of too much spirit and honour.&nbsp;
+Denunciation is hurled against him.&nbsp; The proof?&nbsp; The
+proof is here.</p>
+<p>The Time is panting for an answer to the question, Will Lord
+John Russell consent to take office under Lord Palmerston?&nbsp;
+Good.&nbsp; The London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater
+is in the act of writing his weekly letter, finds himself rather
+at a loss to settle this question finally, leaves off, puts his
+hat on, goes down to the lobby of the House of Commons, sends in
+for Lord John Russell, and has him out.&nbsp; He draws his arm
+through his Lordship&rsquo;s, takes him aside, and says,
+&ldquo;John, will you ever accept office under
+Palmerston?&rdquo;&nbsp; His Lordship replies, &ldquo;I will
+not.&rdquo;&nbsp; The Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent
+retorts, with the caution such a man is bound to use,
+&ldquo;John, think again; say nothing to me rashly; is there any
+temper here?&rdquo;&nbsp; His Lordship replies, calmly,
+&ldquo;None whatever.&rdquo;&nbsp; After giving him time for
+reflection, the Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent says,
+&ldquo;Once more, John, let me put a question to you.&nbsp; Will
+you ever accept office under Palmerston?&rdquo;&nbsp; His
+Lordship answers (note the exact expressions), &ldquo;Nothing
+shall induce me, ever to accept a seat in a Cabinet of which
+Palmerston is the Chief.&rdquo;&nbsp; They part, the London
+Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater finishes his letter,
+and&mdash;always being withheld by motives of delicacy, from
+plainly divulging his means of getting accurate information on
+every subject, at first hand&mdash;puts in it, this passage:
+&ldquo;Lord John Russell is spoken of, by blunderers, for Foreign
+Affairs; but I have the best reasons for assuring your readers,
+that&rdquo; (giving prominence to the exact expressions, it will
+be observed) &ldquo;&lsquo;<span class="GutSmall">NOTHING WILL
+EVER INDUCE HIM, TO ACCEPT A SEAT IN A CABINET OF WHICH
+PALMERSTON IS THE CHIEF</span>.&rsquo;&nbsp; On this you may
+implicitly rely.&rdquo;&nbsp; What happens?&nbsp; On the very day
+of the publication of that number of the Bleater&mdash;the
+malignity of the conspirators being even manifested in the
+selection of the day&mdash;Lord John Russell takes the Foreign
+Office!&nbsp; Comment were superfluous.</p>
+<p>The people of Tattlesnivel will be told, have been told, that
+Lord John Russell is a man of his word.&nbsp; He may be, on some
+occasions; but, when overshadowed by this dark and enormous
+growth of conspiracy, Tattlesnivel knows him to be
+otherwise.&nbsp; &ldquo;I happen to be certain, deriving my
+information from a source which cannot be doubted to be
+authentic,&rdquo; wrote the London Correspondent of the Bleater,
+within the last year, &ldquo;that Lord John Russell bitterly
+regrets having made that explicit speech of last
+Monday.&rdquo;&nbsp; These are not roundabout phrases; these are
+plain words.&nbsp; What does Lord John Russell (apparently by
+accident), within eight-and-forty hours after their diffusion
+over the civilised globe?&nbsp; Rises in his place in Parliament,
+and unblushingly declares that if the occasion could arise five
+hundred times, for his making that very speech, he would make it
+five hundred times!&nbsp; Is there no conspiracy here?&nbsp; And
+is this combination against one who would be always right if he
+were not proved always wrong, to be endured in a country that
+boasts of its freedom and its fairness?</p>
+<p>But, the Tattlesnivellian who now raises his voice against
+intolerable oppression, may be told that, after all, this is a
+political conspiracy.&nbsp; He may be told, forsooth, that Mr.
+Disraeli&rsquo;s being in it, that Lord Derby&rsquo;s being in
+it, that Mr. Bright&rsquo;s being in it, that every Home,
+Foreign, and Colonial Secretary&rsquo;s being in it, that every
+ministry&rsquo;s and every opposition&rsquo;s being in it, are
+but proofs that men will do in politics what they would do in
+nothing else.&nbsp; Is this the plea?&nbsp; If so, the rejoinder
+is, that the mighty conspiracy includes the whole circle of
+Artists of all kinds, and comprehends all degrees of men, down to
+the worst criminal and the hangman who ends his career.&nbsp;
+For, all these are intimately known to the London Correspondent
+of the Tattlesnivel Bleater, and all these deceive him.</p>
+<p>Sir, put it to the proof.&nbsp; There is the Bleater on the
+file&mdash;documentary evidence.&nbsp; Weeks, months, before the
+Exhibition of the Royal Academy, the Bleater&rsquo;s London
+Correspondent knows the subjects of all the leading pictures,
+knows what the painters first meant to do, knows what they
+afterwards substituted for what they first meant to do, knows
+what they ought to do and won&rsquo;t do, knows what they ought
+not to do and will do, knows to a letter from whom they have
+commissions, knows to a shilling how much they are to be
+paid.&nbsp; Now, no sooner is each studio clear of the remarkable
+man to whom each studio-occupant has revealed himself as he does
+not reveal himself to his nearest and dearest bosom friend, than
+conspiracy and fraud begin.&nbsp; Alfred the Great becomes the
+Fairy Queen; Moses viewing the Promised Land, turns out to be
+Moses going to the Fair; Portrait of His Grace the Archbishop of
+Canterbury, is transformed, as if by irreverent enchantment of
+the dissenting interest, into A Favourite Terrier, or Cattle
+Grazing; and the most extraordinary work of art in the list
+described by the Bleater, is coolly sponged out altogether, and
+asserted never to have had existence at all, even in the most
+shadow thoughts of its executant!&nbsp; This is vile enough, but
+this is not all.&nbsp; Picture-buyers then come forth from their
+secret positions, and creep into their places in the
+assassin-multitude of conspirators.&nbsp; Mr. Baring, after
+expressly telling the Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent that
+he had bought No. 39 for one thousand guineas, gives it up to
+somebody unknown for a couple of hundred pounds; the Marquis of
+Lansdowne pretends to have no knowledge whatever of the
+commissions to which the London Correspondent of the Bleater
+swore him, but allows a Railway Contractor to cut him out for
+half the money.&nbsp; Similar examples might be multiplied.&nbsp;
+Shame, shame, on these men!&nbsp; Is this England?</p>
+<p>Sir, look again at Literature.&nbsp; The Bleater&rsquo;s
+London Correspondent is not merely acquainted with all the
+eminent writers, but is in possession of the secrets of their
+souls.&nbsp; He is versed in their hidden meanings and
+references, sees their manuscripts before publication, and knows
+the subjects and titles of their books when they are not
+begun.&nbsp; How dare those writers turn upon the eminent man and
+depart from every intention they have confided to him?&nbsp; How
+do they justify themselves in entirely altering their
+manuscripts, changing their titles, and abandoning their
+subjects?&nbsp; Will they deny, in the face of Tattlesnivel, that
+they do so?&nbsp; If they have such hardihood, let the file of
+the Bleater strike them dumb.&nbsp; By their fruits they shall be
+known.&nbsp; Let their works be compared with the anticipatory
+letters of the Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent, and their
+falsehood and deceit will become manifest as the sun; it will be
+seen that they do nothing which they stand pledged to the
+Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent to do; it will be seen that
+they are among the blackest parties in this black and base
+conspiracy.&nbsp; This will become apparent, sir, not only as to
+their public proceedings but as to their private affairs.&nbsp;
+The outraged Tattlesnivellian who now drags this infamous
+combination into the face of day, charges those literary persons
+with making away with their property, imposing on the Income Tax
+Commissioners, keeping false books, and entering into sham
+contracts.&nbsp; He accuses them on the unimpeachable faith of
+the London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater.&nbsp; With
+whose evidence they will find it impossible to reconcile their
+own account of any transaction of their lives.</p>
+<p>The national character is degenerating under the influence of
+the ramifications of this tremendous conspiracy.&nbsp; Forgery is
+committed, constantly.&nbsp; A person of note&mdash;any sort of
+person of note&mdash;dies.&nbsp; The Bleater&rsquo;s London
+Correspondent knows what his circumstances are, what his savings
+are (if any), who his creditors are, all about his children and
+relations, and (in general, before his body is cold) describes
+his will.&nbsp; Is that will ever proved?&nbsp; Never!&nbsp; Some
+other will is substituted; the real instrument, destroyed.&nbsp;
+And this (as has been before observed), is England.</p>
+<p>Who are the workmen and artificers, enrolled upon the books of
+this treacherous league?&nbsp; From what funds are they paid, and
+with what ceremonies are they sworn to secrecy?&nbsp; Are there
+none such?&nbsp; Observe what follows.&nbsp; A little time ago
+the Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent had this passage:
+&ldquo;Boddleboy is pianoforte playing at St. Januarius&rsquo;s
+Gallery, with pretty tolerable success!&nbsp; He clears three
+hundred pounds per night.&nbsp; Not bad this!!&rdquo;&nbsp; The
+builder of St. Januarius&rsquo;s Gallery (plunged to the throat
+in the conspiracy) met with this piece of news, and observed,
+with characteristic coarseness, &ldquo;that the Bleater&rsquo;s
+London Correspondent was a Blind Ass&rdquo;.&nbsp; Being pressed
+by a man of spirit to give his reasons for this extraordinary
+statement, he declared that the Gallery, crammed to suffocation,
+would not hold two hundred pounds, and that its expenses were,
+probably, at least half what it did hold.&nbsp; The man of spirit
+(himself a Tattlesnivellian) had the Gallery measured within a
+week from that hour, and it would not hold two hundred
+pounds!&nbsp; Now, can the poorest capacity doubt that it had
+been altered in the meantime?</p>
+<p>And so the conspiracy extends, through every grade of society,
+down to the condemned criminal in prison, the hangman, and the
+Ordinary.&nbsp; Every famous murderer within the last ten years
+has desecrated his last moments by falsifying his confidences
+imparted specially to the London Correspondent of the
+Tattlesnivel Bleater; on every such occasion, Mr. Calcraft has
+followed the degrading example; and the reverend Ordinary,
+forgetful of his cloth, and mindful only (it would seem, alas!)
+of the conspiracy, has committed himself to some account or other
+of the criminal&rsquo;s demeanour and conversation, which has
+been diametrically opposed to the exclusive information of the
+London Correspondent of the Bleater.&nbsp; And this (as has been
+before observed) is Merry England!</p>
+<p>A man of true genius, however, is not easily defeated.&nbsp;
+The Bleater&rsquo;s London Correspondent, probably beginning to
+suspect the existence of a plot against him, has recently fallen
+on a new style, which, as being very difficult to countermine,
+may necessitate the organisation of a new conspiracy.&nbsp; One
+of his masterly letters, lately, disclosed the adoption of this
+style&mdash;which was remarked with profound sensation throughout
+Tattlesnivel&mdash;in the following passage: &ldquo;Mentioning
+literary small talk, I may tell you that some new and
+extraordinary rumours are afloat concerning the conversations I
+have previously mentioned, alleged to have taken place in the
+first floor front (situated over the street door), of Mr. X.
+Ameter (the poet so well known to your readers), in which, X.
+Ameter&rsquo;s great uncle, his second son, his butcher, and a
+corpulent gentleman with one eye universally respected at
+Kensington, are said not to have been on the most friendly
+footing; I forbear, however, to pursue the subject further, this
+week, my informant not being able to supply me with exact
+particulars.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>But, enough, sir.&nbsp; The inhabitant of Tattlesnivel who has
+taken pen in hand to expose this odious association of
+unprincipled men against a shining (local) character, turns from
+it with disgust and contempt.&nbsp; Let him in few words strip
+the remaining flimsy covering from the nude object of the
+conspirators, and his loathsome task is ended.</p>
+<p>Sir, that object, he contends, is evidently twofold.&nbsp;
+First, to exhibit the London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel
+Bleater in the light of a mischievous Blockhead who, by hiring
+himself out to tell what he cannot possibly know, is as great a
+public nuisance as a Blockhead in a corner can be.&nbsp; Second,
+to suggest to the men of Tattlesnivel that it does not improve
+their town to have so much Dry Rubbish shot there.</p>
+<p>Now, sir, on both these points Tattlesnivel demands in accents
+of Thunder, Where is the Attorney General?&nbsp; Why
+doesn&rsquo;t the <i>Times</i> take it up?&nbsp; (Is the latter
+in the conspiracy?&nbsp; It never adopts his views, or quotes
+him, and incessantly contradicts him.)&nbsp; Tattlesnivel, sir,
+remembering that our forefathers contended with the Norman at
+Hastings, and bled at a variety of other places that will readily
+occur to you, demands that its birthright shall not be bartered
+away for a mess of pottage.&nbsp; Have a care, sir, have a
+care!&nbsp; Or Tattlesnivel (its idle Rifles piled in its scouted
+streets) may be seen ere long, advancing with its Bleater to the
+foot of the Throne, and demanding redress for this conspiracy,
+from the orbed and sceptred hands of Majesty itself!</p>
+<h2><a name="page497"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 497</span>THE
+YOUNG MAN FROM THE COUNTRY</h2>
+<p>A <span class="smcap">song</span> of the hour, now in course
+of being sung and whistled in every street, the other day
+reminded the writer of these words&mdash;as he chanced to pass a
+fag-end of the song for the twentieth time in a short London
+walk&mdash;that twenty years ago, a little book on the United
+States, entitled <i>American Notes</i>, was published by &ldquo;a
+Young Man from the Country&rdquo;, who had just seen and left
+it.</p>
+<p>This Young Man from the Country fell into a deal of trouble,
+by reason of having taken the liberty to believe that he
+perceived in America downward popular tendencies for which his
+young enthusiasm had been anything but prepared.&nbsp; It was in
+vain for the Young Man to offer in extenuation of his belief that
+no stranger could have set foot on those shores with a feeling of
+livelier interest in the country, and stronger faith in it, than
+he.&nbsp; Those were the days when the Tories had made their
+Ashburton Treaty, and when Whigs and Radicals must have no theory
+disturbed.&nbsp; All three parties waylaid and mauled the Young
+Man from the Country, and showed that he knew nothing about the
+country.</p>
+<p>As the Young Man from the Country had observed in the Preface
+to his little book, that he &ldquo;could bide his time&rdquo;, he
+took all this in silent part for eight years.&nbsp; Publishing
+then, a cheap edition of his book, he made no stronger protest
+than the following:</p>
+<blockquote><p>&ldquo;My readers have opportunities of judging
+for themselves whether the influences and tendencies which I
+distrusted in America, have any existence but in my
+imagination.&nbsp; They can examine for themselves whether there
+has been anything in the public career of that country during
+these past eight years, or whether there is anything in its
+present position, at home or abroad, which suggests that those
+influences and tendencies really do exist.&nbsp; As they find the
+fact, they will judge me.&nbsp; If they discern any evidences of
+wrong-going, in any direction that I have indicated, they will
+acknowledge that I had reason in what I wrote.&nbsp; If they
+discern no such thing, they will consider me altogether
+mistaken.&nbsp; I have nothing to defend, or to explain
+away.&nbsp; The truth is the truth; and neither childish
+absurdities, nor unscrupulous contradictions, can make it
+otherwise.&nbsp; The earth would still move round the sun, though
+the whole Catholic Church said No.&rdquo;</p>
+</blockquote>
+<p>Twelve more years having since passed away, it may now, at
+last, be simply just towards the Young Man from the Country, to
+compare what he originally wrote, with recent events and their
+plain motive powers.&nbsp; Treating of the House of
+Representatives at Washington, he wrote thus:</p>
+<blockquote><p>&ldquo;Did I recognise in this assembly, a body of
+men, who, applying themselves in a new world to correct some of
+the falsehoods and vices of the old, purified the avenues to
+Public Life, paved the dirty ways to Place and Power, debated and
+made laws for the Common Good, and had no party but their
+Country?</p>
+<p>&ldquo;I saw in them, the wheels that move the meanest
+perversion of virtuous Political Machinery that the worst tools
+ever wrought.&nbsp; Despicable trickery at elections;
+under-handed tamperings with public officers; cowardly attacks
+upon opponents, with scurrilous newspapers for shields, and hired
+pens for daggers; shameful trucklings to mercenary knaves, whose
+claim to be considered, is, that every day and week they sow new
+crops of ruin with their venal types, which are the
+dragon&rsquo;s teeth of yore, in everything but sharpness;
+aidings and abettings of every bad inclination in the popular
+mind, and artful suppressions of all its good influences: such
+things as these, and in a word, Dishonest Faction in its most
+depraved and most unblushing form, stared out from every corner
+of the crowded hall.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Did I see among them, the intelligence and refinement:
+the true, honest, patriotic heart of America?&nbsp; Here and
+there, were drops of its blood and life, but they scarcely
+coloured the stream of desperate adventurers which sets that way
+for profit and for pay.&nbsp; It is the game of these men, and of
+their profligate organs, to make the strife of politics so fierce
+and brutal, and so destructive of all self-respect in worthy men,
+that sensitive and delicate-minded persons shall be kept aloof,
+and they, and such as they, be left to battle out their selfish
+views unchecked.&nbsp; And thus this lowest of all scrambling
+fights goes on, and they who in other countries would, from their
+intelligence and station, most aspire to make the laws, do here
+recoil the farthest from that degradation.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;That there are, among the representatives of the people
+in both Houses, and among all parties, some men of high character
+and great abilities, I need not say.&nbsp; The foremost among
+those politicians who are known in Europe, have been already
+described, and I see no reason to depart from the rule I have
+laid down for my guidance, of abstaining from all mention of
+individuals.&nbsp; It will be sufficient to add, that to the most
+favourable accounts that have been written of them, I fully and
+most heartily subscribe; and that personal intercourse and free
+communication have bred within me, not the result predicted in
+the very doubtful proverb, but increased admiration and
+respect.&rdquo;</p>
+</blockquote>
+<p>Towards the end of his book, the Young Man from the Country
+thus expressed himself concerning its people:</p>
+<blockquote><p>&ldquo;They are, by nature, frank, brave, cordial,
+hospitable, and affectionate.&nbsp; Cultivation and refinement
+seem but to enhance their warmth of heart and ardent enthusiasm;
+and it is the possession of these latter qualities in a most
+remarkable degree, which renders an educated American one of the
+most endearing and most generous of friends.&nbsp; I never was so
+won upon, as by this class; never yielded up my full confidence
+and esteem so readily and pleasurably, as to them; never can make
+again, in half a year, so many friends for whom I seem to
+entertain the regard of half a life.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;These qualities are natural, I implicitly believe, to
+the whole people.&nbsp; That they are, however, sadly sapped and
+blighted in their growth among the mass; and that there are
+influences at work which endanger them still more, and give but
+little present promise of their healthy restoration; is a truth
+that ought to be told.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;It is an essential part of every national character to
+pique itself mightily upon its faults, and to deduce tokens of
+its virtue or its wisdom from their very exaggeration.&nbsp; One
+great blemish in the popular mind of America, and the prolific
+parent of an innumerable brood of evils, is Universal
+Distrust.&nbsp; Yet the American citizen plumes himself upon this
+spirit, even when he is sufficiently dispassionate to perceive
+the ruin it works; and will often adduce it, in spite of his own
+reason, as an instance of the great sagacity and acuteness of the
+people, and their superior shrewdness and independence.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;&lsquo;You carry,&rsquo; says the stranger, &lsquo;this
+jealousy and distrust into every transaction of public
+life.&nbsp; By repelling worthy men from your legislative
+assemblies, it has bred up a class of candidates for the
+suffrage, who, in their every act, disgrace your Institutions and
+your people&rsquo;s choice.&nbsp; It has rendered you so fickle,
+and so given to change, that your inconstancy has passed into a
+proverb; for you no sooner set up an idol firmly, than you are
+sure to pull it down and dash it into fragments: and this,
+because directly you reward a benefactor, or a public-servant,
+you distrust him, merely because he <i>is</i> rewarded; and
+immediately apply yourselves to find out, either that you have
+been too bountiful in your acknowledgments, or he remiss in his
+deserts.&nbsp; Any man who attains a high place among you, from
+the President downwards, may date his downfall from that moment;
+for any printed lie that any notorious villain pens, although it
+militate directly against the character and conduct of a life,
+appeals at once to your distrust, and is believed.&nbsp; You will
+strain at a gnat in the way of trustfulness and confidence,
+however fairly won and well deserved; but you will swallow a
+whole caravan of camels, if they be laden with unworthy doubts
+and mean suspicions.&nbsp; Is this well, think you, or likely to
+elevate the character of the governors or the governed, among
+you?&rsquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;The answer is invariably the same: &lsquo;There&rsquo;s
+freedom of opinion here, you know.&nbsp; Every man thinks for
+himself, and we are not to be easily overreached.&nbsp;
+That&rsquo;s how our people come to be suspicious.&rsquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Another prominent feature is the love of
+&lsquo;smart&rsquo; dealing: which gilds over many a swindle and
+gross breach of trust; many a defalcation, public and private;
+and enables many a knave to hold his head up with the best, who
+well deserves a halter: though it has not been without its
+retributive operation, for this smartness has done more in a few
+years to impair the public credit, and to cripple the public
+resources, than dull honesty, however rash, could have effected
+in a century.&nbsp; The merits of a broken speculation, or a
+bankruptcy, or of a successful scoundrel, are not gauged by its
+or his observance of the golden rule, &lsquo;Do as you would be
+done by&rsquo;, but are considered with reference to their
+smartness.&nbsp; I recollect, on both occasions of our passing
+that ill-fated Cairo on the Mississippi, remarking on the bad
+effects such gross deceits must have when they exploded, in
+generating a want of confidence abroad, and discouraging foreign
+investment: but I was given to understand that this was a very
+smart scheme by which a deal of money had been made: and that its
+smartest feature was, that they forgot these things abroad, in a
+very short time, and speculated again, as freely as ever.&nbsp;
+The following dialogue I have held a hundred times: &lsquo;Is it
+not a very disgraceful circumstance that such a man as So-and-so
+should be acquiring a large property by the most infamous and
+odious means, and notwithstanding all the crimes of which he has
+been guilty, should be tolerated and abetted by your
+citizens?&nbsp; He is a public nuisance, is he not?&rsquo;&nbsp;
+&lsquo;Yes, sir.&rsquo;&nbsp; &lsquo;A convicted
+liar?&rsquo;&nbsp; &lsquo;Yes, sir.&rsquo;&nbsp; &lsquo;He has
+been kicked, and cuffed, and caned?&rsquo;&nbsp; &lsquo;Yes,
+sir.&rsquo;&nbsp; &lsquo;And he is utterly dishonourable,
+debased, and profligate?&rsquo;&nbsp; &lsquo;Yes,
+sir.&rsquo;&nbsp; &lsquo;In the name of wonder, then, what is his
+merit?&rsquo;&nbsp; &lsquo;Well, sir, he is a smart
+man.&rsquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;But the foul growth of America has a more tangled root
+than this; and it strikes its fibres, deep in its licentious
+Press.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Schools may he erected, East, West, North, and South;
+pupils be taught, and masters reared, by scores upon scores of
+thousands; colleges may thrive, churches may be crammed,
+temperance may be diffused, and advancing knowledge in all other
+forms walk through the land with giant strides; but while the
+newspaper press of America is in, or near, its present abject
+state, high moral improvement in that country is hopeless.&nbsp;
+Year by year, it must and will go back; year by year, the tone of
+public opinion must sink lower down; year by year, the Congress
+and the Senate must become of less account before all decent men;
+and year by year, the memory of the Great Fathers of the
+Revolution must be outraged more and more, in the bad life of
+their degenerate child.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Among the herd of journals which are published in the
+States, there are some, the reader scarcely need be told, of
+character and credit.&nbsp; From personal intercourse with
+accomplished gentlemen connected with publications of this class,
+I have derived both pleasure and profit.&nbsp; But the name of
+these is Few, and of the others Legion; and the influence of the
+good, is powerless to counteract the moral poison of the bad.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Among the gentry of America; among the well-informed
+and moderate; in the learned professions; at the bar and on the
+bench; there is, as there can be, but one opinion, in reference
+to the vicious character of these infamous journals.&nbsp; It is
+sometimes contended&mdash;I will not say strangely, for it is
+natural to seek excuses for such a disgrace&mdash;that their
+influence is not so great as a visitor would suppose.&nbsp; I
+must be pardoned for saying that there is no warrant for this
+plea, and that every fact and circumstance tends directly to the
+opposite conclusion.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;When any man, of any grade of desert in intellect or
+character, can climb to any public distinction, no matter what,
+in America, without first grovelling down upon the earth, and
+bending the knee before this monster of depravity; when any
+private excellence is safe from its attacks; when any social
+confidence is left unbroken by it; or any tie of social decency
+and honour is held in the least regard; when any man in that Free
+Country has freedom of opinion, and presumes to think for
+himself, and speak for himself, without humble reference to a
+censorship which, for its rampant ignorance and base dishonesty,
+he utterly loaths and despises in his heart; when those who most
+acutely feel its infamy and the reproach it casts upon the
+nation, and who most denounce it to each other, dare to set their
+heels upon, and crush it openly, in the sight of all men: then, I
+will believe that its influence is lessening, and men are
+returning to their manly senses.&nbsp; But while that Press has
+its evil eye in every house, and its black hand in every
+appointment in the state, from a president to a postman; while,
+with ribald slander for its only stock in trade, it is the
+standard literature of an enormous class, who must find their
+reading in a newspaper, or they will not read at all; so long
+must its odium be upon the country&rsquo;s head, and so long must
+the evil it works, be plainly visible in the Republic.&rdquo;</p>
+</blockquote>
+<p>The foregoing was written in the year eighteen hundred and
+forty-two.&nbsp; It rests with the reader to decide whether it
+has received any confirmation, or assumed any colour of truth, in
+or about the year eighteen hundred and sixty-two.</p>
+<h2><a name="page502"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 502</span>AN
+ENLIGHTENED CLERGYMAN</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">At</span> various places in Suffolk (as
+elsewhere) penny readings take place &ldquo;for the instruction
+and amusement of the lower classes&rdquo;.&nbsp; There is a
+little town in Suffolk called Eye, where the subject of one of
+these readings was a tale (by Mr. Wilkie Collins) from the last
+Christmas Number of this Journal, entitled &ldquo;Picking up
+Waifs at Sea&rdquo;.&nbsp; It appears that the Eye gentility was
+shocked by the introduction of this rude piece among the taste
+and musical glasses of that important town, on which the eyes of
+Europe are notoriously always fixed.&nbsp; In particular, the
+feelings of the vicar&rsquo;s family were outraged; and a Local
+Organ (say, the Tattlesnivel Bleater) consequently doomed the
+said piece to everlasting oblivion, as being of an
+&ldquo;injurious tendency!&rdquo;</p>
+<p>When this fearful fact came to the knowledge of the unhappy
+writer of the doomed tale in question, he covered his face with
+his robe, previous to dying decently under the sharp steel of the
+ecclesiastical gentility of the terrible town of Eye.&nbsp; But
+the discovery that he was not alone in his gloomy glory, revived
+him, and he still lives.</p>
+<p>For, at Stowmarket, in the aforesaid county of Suffolk, at
+another of those penny readings, it was announced that a certain
+juvenile sketch, culled from a volume of sketches (by Boz) and
+entitled &ldquo;The Bloomsbury Christening&rdquo;, would be
+read.&nbsp; Hereupon, the clergyman of that place took heart and
+pen, and addressed the following terrific epistle to a gentleman
+bearing the very appropriate name of Gudgeon:</p>
+<blockquote><p style="text-align: right"><span
+class="smcap">Stowmarket Vicarage</span>, <i>Feb.</i> 25,
+1861.</p>
+<p><span class="smcap">Sir</span>,&mdash;My attention has been
+directed to a piece called &ldquo;The Bloomsbury
+Christening&rdquo; which you propose to read this evening.&nbsp;
+Without presuming to claim any interference in the arrangement of
+the readings, I would suggest to you whether you have on this
+occasion sufficiently considered the character of the composition
+you have selected.&nbsp; I quite appreciate the laudable motive
+of the promoters of the readings to raise the moral tone amongst
+the working class of the town and to direct this taste in a
+familiar and pleasant manner.&nbsp; &ldquo;The Bloomsbury
+Christening&rdquo; cannot possibly do this.&nbsp; It trifles with
+a sacred ordinance, and the language and style, instead of
+improving the taste, has a direct tendency to lower it.</p>
+<p>I appeal to your right feeling whether it is desirable to give
+publicity to that which must shock several of your audience, and
+create a smile amongst others, to be indulged in only by
+violating the conscientious scruples of their neighbours.</p>
+<p>The ordinance which is here exposed to ridicule is one which
+is much misunderstood and neglected amongst many families
+belonging to the Church of England, and the mode in which it is
+treated in this chapter cannot fail to appear as giving a
+sanction to, or at least excusing, such neglect.</p>
+<p>Although you are pledged to the public to give this subject,
+yet I cannot but believe that they would fully justify your
+substitution of it for another did they know the
+circumstances.&nbsp; An abridgment would only lessen the evil in
+a degree, as it is not only the style of the writing but the
+subject itself which is objectionable.</p>
+<p>Excuse me for troubling you, but I felt that, in common with
+yourself, I have a grave responsibility in the matter, and I am
+most truly yours,</p>
+<p style="text-align: right">T. S. <span
+class="smcap">Coles</span>.</p>
+<p>To Mr. J. Gudgeon.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<p>It is really necessary to explain that this is not a bad
+joke.&nbsp; It is simply a bad fact.</p>
+<h2><a name="page504"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+504</span>RATHER A STRONG DOSE</h2>
+<p>&ldquo;<span class="smcap">Doctor John Campbell</span>, the
+minister of the Tabernacle Chapel, Finsbury, and editor of the
+<i>British Banner</i>, etc., with that massive vigour which
+distinguishes his style,&rdquo; did, we are informed by Mr.
+Howitt, &ldquo;deliver a verdict in the <i>Banner</i>, for
+November, 1852,&rdquo; of great importance and favour to the
+Table-rapping cause.&nbsp; We are not informed whether the
+Public, sitting in judgment on the question, reserved any point
+in this great verdict for subsequent consideration; but the
+verdict would seem to have been regarded by a perverse generation
+as not quite final, inasmuch as Mr. Howitt finds it necessary to
+re-open the case, a round ten years afterwards, in nine hundred
+and sixty-two stiff octavo pages, published by Messrs. Longman
+and Company.</p>
+<p>Mr. Howitt is in such a bristling temper on the Supernatural
+subject, that we will not take the great liberty of arguing any
+point with him.&nbsp; But&mdash;with the view of assisting him to
+make converts&mdash;we will inform our readers, on his conclusive
+authority, what they are required to believe; premising what may
+rather astonish them in connexion with their views of a certain
+historical trifle, called The Reformation, that their present
+state of unbelief is all the fault of Protestantism, and that
+&ldquo;it is high time, therefore, to protest against
+Protestantism&rdquo;.</p>
+<p>They will please to believe, by way of an easy beginning, all
+the stories of good and evil demons, ghosts, prophecies,
+communication with spirits, and practice of magic, that ever
+obtained, or are said to have ever obtained, in the North, in the
+South, in the East, in the West, from the earliest and darkest
+ages, as to which we have any hazy intelligence, real or
+supposititious, down to the yet unfinished displacement of the
+red men in North America.&nbsp; They will please to believe that
+nothing in this wise was changed by the fulfilment of our
+Saviour&rsquo;s mission upon earth; and further, that what Saint
+Paul did, can be done again, and has been done again.&nbsp; As
+this is not much to begin with, they will throw in at this point
+rejection of Faraday and Brewster, and &ldquo;poor Paley&rdquo;,
+and implicit acceptance of those shining lights, the Reverend
+Charles Beecher, and the Reverend Henry Ward Beecher (&ldquo;one
+of the most vigorous and eloquent preachers of America&rdquo;),
+and the Reverend Adin Ballou.</p>
+<p>Having thus cleared the way for a healthy exercise of faith,
+our advancing readers will next proceed especially to believe in
+the old story of the Drummer of Tedworth, in the inspiration of
+George Fox, in &ldquo;the spiritualism, prophecies, and
+provision&rdquo; of Huntington the coal-porter (him who prayed
+for the leather breeches which miraculously fitted him), and even
+in the Cock Lane Ghost.&nbsp; They will please wind up, before
+fetching their breath, with believing that there is a close
+analogy between rejection of any such plain and proved facts as
+those contained in the whole foregoing catalogue, and the
+opposition encountered by the inventors of railways, lighting by
+gas, microscopes and telescopes, and vaccination.&nbsp; This
+stinging consideration they will always carry rankling in their
+remorseful hearts as they advance.</p>
+<p>As touching the Cock Lane Ghost, our conscience-stricken
+readers will please particularly to reproach themselves for
+having ever supposed that important spiritual manifestation to
+have been a gross imposture which was thoroughly detected.&nbsp;
+They will please to believe that Dr. Johnson believed in it, and
+that, in Mr. Howitt&rsquo;s words, he &ldquo;appears to have had
+excellent reasons for his belief&rdquo;.&nbsp; With a view to
+this end, the faithful will be so good as to obliterate from
+their Boswells the following passage: &ldquo;Many of my readers,
+I am convinced, are to this hour under an impression that Johnson
+was thus foolishly deceived.&nbsp; It will therefore surprise
+them a good deal when they are informed upon undoubted authority
+that Johnson was one of those by whom the imposture was
+detected.&nbsp; The story had become so popular, that he thought
+it should be investigated, and in this research he was assisted
+by the Rev. Dr. Douglas, now Bishop of Salisbury, the great
+detector of impostures&rdquo;&mdash;and therefore tremendously
+obnoxious to Mr. Howitt&mdash;&ldquo;who informs me that after
+the gentlemen who went and examined into the evidence were
+satisfied of its falsity, Johnson wrote in their presence an
+account of it, which was published in the newspapers and
+<i>Gentleman&rsquo;s Magazine</i>, and undeceived the
+world&rdquo;.&nbsp; But as there will still remain another highly
+inconvenient passage in the Boswells of the true believers, they
+must likewise be at the trouble of cancelling the following also,
+referring to a later time: &ldquo;He (Johnson) expressed great
+indignation at the imposture of the Cock Lane Ghost, and related
+with much satisfaction how he had assisted in detecting the
+cheat, and had published an account of it in the
+newspapers&rdquo;.</p>
+<p>They will next believe (if they be, in the words of Captain
+Bobadil, &ldquo;so generously minded&rdquo;) in the transatlantic
+trance-speakers &ldquo;who professed to speak from direct
+inspiration&rdquo;, Mrs. Cora Hatch, Mrs. Henderson, and Miss
+Emma Hardinge; and they will believe in those eminent ladies
+having &ldquo;spoken on Sundays to five hundred thousand
+hearers&rdquo;&mdash;small audiences, by the way, compared with
+the intelligent concourse recently assembled in the city of New
+York, to do honour to the Nuptials of General the Honourable T.
+Barnum Thumb.&nbsp; At about this stage of their spiritual
+education they may take the opportunity of believing in
+&ldquo;letters from a distinguished gentleman of New York, in
+which the frequent appearance of the gentleman&rsquo;s deceased
+wife and of Dr. Franklin, to him and other well-known friends,
+are unquestionably unequalled in the annals of the
+marvellous&rdquo;.&nbsp; Why these modest appearances should seem
+at all out of the common way to Mr. Howitt (who would be in a
+state of flaming indignation if we thought them so), we could not
+imagine, until we found on reading further, &ldquo;it is solemnly
+stated that the witnesses have not only seen but touched these
+spirits, and handled the clothes and hair of
+Franklin&rdquo;.&nbsp; Without presuming to go Mr. Howitt&rsquo;s
+length of considering this by any means a marvellous experience,
+we yet venture to confess that it has awakened in our mind many
+interesting speculations touching the present whereabout in
+space, of the spirits of Mr. Howitt&rsquo;s own departed boots
+and hats.</p>
+<p>The next articles of belief are Belief in the moderate figures
+of &ldquo;thirty thousand media in the United States in
+1853&rdquo;; and in two million five hundred thousand
+spiritualists in the same country of composed minds, in 1855,
+&ldquo;professing to have arrived at their convictions of
+spiritual communication from personal experience&rdquo;; and in
+&ldquo;an average rate of increase of three hundred thousand per
+annum&rdquo;, still in the same country of calm
+philosophers.&nbsp; Belief in spiritual knockings, in all manner
+of American places, and, among others, in the house of &ldquo;a
+Doctor Phelps at Stratford, Connecticut, a man of the highest
+character for intelligence&rdquo;, says Mr. Howitt, and to whom
+we willingly concede the possession of far higher intelligence
+than was displayed by his spiritual knocker, in &ldquo;frequently
+cutting to pieces the clothes of one of his boys&rdquo;, and in
+breaking &ldquo;seventy-one panes of glass&rdquo;&mdash;unless,
+indeed, the knocker, when in the body, was connected with the
+tailoring and glazing interests.&nbsp; Belief in immaterial
+performers playing (in the dark though: they are obstinate about
+its being in the dark) on material instruments of wood, catgut,
+brass, tin, and parchment.&nbsp; Your belief is further requested
+in &ldquo;the Kentucky Jerks&rdquo;.&nbsp; The spiritual
+achievements thus euphoniously denominated &ldquo;appear&rdquo;,
+says Mr. Howitt, &ldquo;to have been of a very disorderly
+kind&rdquo;.&nbsp; It appears that a certain Mr. Doke, a
+Presbyterian clergyman, &ldquo;was first seized by the
+jerks&rdquo;, and the jerks laid hold of Mr. Doke in that
+unclerical way and with that scant respect for his cloth, that
+they &ldquo;twitched him about in a most extraordinary manner,
+often when in the pulpit, and caused him to shout aloud, and run
+out of the pulpit into the woods, screaming like a madman.&nbsp;
+When the fit was over, he returned calmly to his pulpit and
+finished the service.&rdquo;&nbsp; The congregation having
+waited, we presume, and edified themselves with the distant
+bellowings of Doke in the woods, until he came back again, a
+little warm and hoarse, but otherwise in fine condition.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;People were often seized at hotels, and at table would, on
+lifting a glass to drink, jerk the liquor to the ceiling; ladies
+would at the breakfast-table suddenly be compelled to throw aloft
+their coffee, and frequently break the cup and
+saucer.&rdquo;&nbsp; A certain venturesome clergyman vowed that
+he would preach down the Jerks, &ldquo;but he was seized in the
+midst of his attempt, and made so ridiculous that he withdrew
+himself from further notice&rdquo;&mdash;an example much to be
+commended.&nbsp; That same favoured land of America has been
+particularly favoured in the development of &ldquo;innumerable
+mediums&rdquo;, and Mr. Howitt orders you to believe in Daniel
+Dunglas Home, Andrew Davis Jackson, and Thomas L. Harris, as
+&ldquo;the three most remarkable, or most familiar, on this side
+of the Atlantic&rdquo;.&nbsp; Concerning Mr. Home, the articles
+of belief (besides removal of furniture) are, That through him
+raps have been given and communications made from deceased
+friends.&nbsp; That &ldquo;his hand has been seized by spirit
+influence, and rapid communications written out, of a surprising
+character to those to whom they were addressed&rdquo;.&nbsp; That
+at his bidding, &ldquo;spirit hands have appeared which have been
+seen, felt, and recognised frequently, by persons present, as
+those of deceased friends&rdquo;.&nbsp; That he has been
+frequently lifted up and carried, floating &ldquo;as it
+were&rdquo; through a room, near the ceiling.&nbsp; That in
+America, &ldquo;all these phenomena have displayed themselves in
+greater force than here&rdquo;&mdash;which we have not the
+slightest doubt of.&nbsp; That he is &ldquo;the planter of
+spiritualism all over Europe&rdquo;.&nbsp; That &ldquo;by
+circumstances that no man could have devised, he became the guest
+of the Emperor of the French, of the King of Holland, of the Czar
+of Russia, and of many lesser princes&rdquo;.&nbsp; That he
+returned from &ldquo;this unpremeditated missionary tour&rdquo;,
+&ldquo;endowed with competence&rdquo;; but not before, &ldquo;at
+the Tuileries, on one occasion when the emperor, empress, a
+distinguished lady, and himself only were sitting at table, a
+hand appeared, took up a pen, and wrote, in a strong and
+well-known character, the word Napoleon.&nbsp; The hand was then
+successively presented to the several personages of the party to
+kiss.&rdquo;&nbsp; The stout believer, having disposed of Mr.
+Home, and rested a little, will then proceed to believe in Andrew
+Davis Jackson, or Andrew Jackson Davis (Mr. Howitt, having no
+Medium at hand to settle this difference and reveal the right
+name of the seer, calls him by both names), who merely
+&ldquo;beheld all the essential natures of things, saw the
+interior of men and animals, as perfectly as their exterior; and
+described them in language so correct, that the most able
+technologists could not surpass him.&nbsp; He pointed out the
+proper remedies for all the complaints, and the shops where they
+were to be obtained&rdquo;;&mdash;in the latter respect appearing
+to hail from an advertising circle, as we conceive.&nbsp; It was
+also in this gentleman&rsquo;s limited department to &ldquo;see
+the metals in the earth&rdquo;, and to have &ldquo;the most
+distant regions and their various productions present before
+him&rdquo;.&nbsp; Having despatched this tough case, the believer
+will pass on to Thomas L. Harris, and will swallow <i>him</i>
+easily, together with &ldquo;whole epics&rdquo; of his
+composition; a certain work &ldquo;of scarcely less than Miltonic
+grandeur&rdquo;, called The Lyric of the Golden Age&mdash;a lyric
+pretty nigh as long as one of Mr. Howitt&rsquo;s
+volumes&mdash;dictated by Mr. (not Mrs.) Harris to the publisher
+in ninety-four hours; and several extempore sermons, possessing
+the remarkably lucid property of being &ldquo;full, unforced,
+out-gushing, unstinted, and absorbing&rdquo;.&nbsp; The candidate
+for examination in pure belief, will then pass on to the
+spirit-photography department; this, again, will be found in
+so-favoured America, under the superintendence of Medium Mumler,
+a photographer of Boston: who was &ldquo;astonished&rdquo;
+(though, on Mr. Howitt&rsquo;s showing, he surely ought not to
+have been) &ldquo;on taking a photograph of himself, to find also
+by his side the figure of a young girl, which he immediately
+recognised as that of a deceased relative.&nbsp; The circumstance
+made a great excitement.&nbsp; Numbers of persons rushed to his
+rooms, and many have found deceased friends photographed with
+themselves.&rdquo;&nbsp; (Perhaps Mr. Mumler, too, may become
+&ldquo;endowed with competence&rdquo; in time.&nbsp; Who
+knows?)&nbsp; Finally, the true believers in the gospel according
+to Howitt, have, besides, but to pin their faith on &ldquo;ladies
+who see spirits habitually&rdquo;, on ladies who <i>know</i> they
+have a tendency to soar in the air on sufficient provocation, and
+on a few other gnats to be taken after their camels, and they
+shall be pronounced by Mr. Howitt not of the stereotyped class of
+minds, and not partakers of &ldquo;the astonishing ignorance of
+the press&rdquo;, and shall receive a first-class certificate of
+merit.</p>
+<p>But before they pass through this portal into the Temple of
+Serene Wisdom, we, halting blind and helpless on the steps, beg
+to suggest to them what they must at once and for ever
+disbelieve.&nbsp; They must disbelieve that in the dark times,
+when very few were versed in what are now the mere recreations of
+Science, and when those few formed a priesthood-class apart, any
+marvels were wrought by the aid of concave mirrors and a
+knowledge of the properties of certain odours and gases, although
+the self-same marvels could be reproduced before their eyes at
+the Polytechnic Institution, Regent Street, London, any day in
+the year.&nbsp; They must by no means believe that Conjuring and
+Ventriloquism are old trades.&nbsp; They must disbelieve all
+Philosophical Transactions containing the records of painful and
+careful inquiry into now familiar disorders of the senses of
+seeing and hearing, and into the wonders of somnambulism,
+epilepsy, hysteria, miasmatic influence, vegetable poisons
+derived by whole communities from corrupted air, diseased
+imitation, and moral infection.&nbsp; They must disbelieve all
+such awkward leading cases as the case of the Woodstock
+Commissioners and their man, and the case of the Identity of the
+Stockwell Ghost, with the maid-servant.&nbsp; They must
+disbelieve the vanishing of champion haunted houses (except,
+indeed, out of Mr. Howitt&rsquo;s book), represented to have been
+closed and ruined for years, before one day&rsquo;s inquiry by
+four gentlemen associated with this journal, and one hour&rsquo;s
+reference to the Local Rate-books.&nbsp; They must disbelieve all
+possibility of a human creature on the last verge of the dark
+bridge from Life to Death, being mysteriously able, in occasional
+cases, so to influence the mind of one very near and dear, as
+vividly to impress that mind with some disturbed sense of the
+solemn change impending.&nbsp; They must disbelieve the
+possibility of the lawful existence of a class of intellects
+which, humbly conscious of the illimitable power of <span
+class="smcap">God</span> and of their own weakness and ignorance,
+never deny that He can cause the souls of the dead to revisit the
+earth, or that He may have caused the souls of the dead to
+revisit the earth, or that He can cause any awful or wondrous
+thing to be; but to deny the likelihood of apparitions or spirits
+coming here upon the stupidest of bootless errands, and producing
+credentials tantamount to a solicitation of our vote and interest
+and next proxy, to get them into the Asylum for Idiots.&nbsp;
+They must disbelieve the right of Christian people who do
+<i>not</i> protest against Protestantism, but who hold it to be a
+barrier against the darkest superstitions that can enslave the
+soul, to guard with jealousy all approaches tending down to Cock
+Lane Ghosts and suchlike infamous swindles, widely degrading when
+widely believed in; and they must disbelieve that such people
+have the right to know, and that it is their duty to know,
+wonder-workers by their fruits, and to test miracle-mongers by
+the tests of probability, analogy, and common sense.&nbsp; They
+must disbelieve all rational explanations of thoroughly proved
+experiences (only) which appear supernatural, derived from the
+average experience and study of the visible world.&nbsp; They
+must disbelieve the speciality of the Master and the Disciples,
+and that it is a monstrosity to test the wonders of show-folk by
+the same touchstone.&nbsp; Lastly, they must disbelieve that one
+of the best accredited chapters in the history of mankind is the
+chapter that records the astonishing deceits continually
+practised, with no object or purpose but the distorted pleasure
+of deceiving.</p>
+<p>We have summed up a few&mdash;not nearly all&mdash;of the
+articles of belief and disbelief to which Mr. Howitt most
+arrogantly demands an implicit adherence.&nbsp; To uphold these,
+he uses a book as a Clown in a Pantomime does, and knocks
+everybody on the head with it who comes in his way.&nbsp;
+Moreover, he is an angrier personage than the Clown, and does not
+experimentally try the effect of his red-hot poker on your shins,
+but straightway runs you through the body and soul with it.&nbsp;
+He is always raging to tell you that if you are not Howitt, you
+are Atheist and Anti-Christ.&nbsp; He is the sans-culotte of the
+Spiritual Revolution, and will not hear of your accepting this
+point and rejecting that;&mdash;down your throat with them all,
+one and indivisible, at the point of the pike; No Liberty,
+Totality, Fraternity, or Death!</p>
+<p>Without presuming to question that &ldquo;it is high time to
+protest against Protestantism&rdquo; on such very substantial
+grounds as Mr. Howitt sets forth, we do presume to think that it
+is high time to protest against Mr. Howitt&rsquo;s spiritualism,
+as being a little in excess of the peculiar merit of Thomas L.
+Harris&rsquo;s sermons, and somewhat <i>too</i> &ldquo;full,
+out-gushing, unstinted, and absorbing&rdquo;.</p>
+<h2><a name="page510"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 510</span>THE
+MARTYR MEDIUM</h2>
+<p>&ldquo;<span class="smcap">After</span> the valets, the
+master!&rdquo; is Mr. Fechter&rsquo;s rallying cry in the
+picturesque romantic drama which attracts all London to the
+Lyceum Theatre.&nbsp; After the worshippers and puffers of Mr.
+Daniel Dunglas Home, the spirit medium, comes Mr. Daniel Dunglas
+Home himself, in one volume.&nbsp; And we must, for the honour of
+Literature, plainly express our great surprise and regret that he
+comes arm-in-arm with such good company as Messrs. Longman and
+Company.</p>
+<p>We have already summed up Mr. Home&rsquo;s demands on the
+public capacity of swallowing, as sounded through the
+war-denouncing trumpet of Mr. Howitt, and it is not our intention
+to revive the strain as performed by Mr. Home on his own
+melodious instrument.&nbsp; We notice, by the way, that in that
+part of the Fantasia where the hand of the first Napoleon is
+supposed to be reproduced, recognised, and kissed, at the
+Tuileries, Mr. Home subdues the florid effects one might have
+expected after Mr. Howitt&rsquo;s execution, and brays in an
+extremely general manner.&nbsp; And yet we observe Mr. Home to be
+in other things very reliant on Mr. Howitt, of whom he entertains
+as gratifying an opinion as Mr. Howitt entertains of him:
+dwelling on his &ldquo;deep researches into this subject&rdquo;,
+and of his &ldquo;great work now ready for the press&rdquo;, and
+of his &ldquo;eloquent and forcible&rdquo; advocacy, and eke of
+his &ldquo;elaborate and almost exhaustive work&rdquo;, which Mr.
+Home trusts will be &ldquo;extensively read&rdquo;.&nbsp; But,
+indeed, it would seem to be the most reliable characteristic of
+the Dear Spirits, though very capricious in other particulars,
+that they always form their circles into what may be described,
+in worldly terms, as A Mutual Admiration and Complimentation
+Company (Limited).</p>
+<p>Mr. Home&rsquo;s book is entitled <i>Incidents in My
+Life</i>.&nbsp; We will extract a dozen sample passages from it,
+as variations on and phrases of harmony in, the general strain
+for the Trumpet, which we have promised not to repeat.</p>
+<h3>1.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">Mr. Home is Supernaturally
+Nursed</span></h3>
+<p>&ldquo;I cannot remember when first I became subject to the
+curious phenomena which have now for so long attended me, but my
+aunt and others have told me that when I was a baby my cradle was
+frequently rocked, as if some kind guardian spirit was attending
+me in my slumbers.&rdquo;</p>
+<h3>2.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">Disrespectful Conduct of Mr.
+Home&rsquo;s Aunt nevertheless</span></h3>
+<p>&ldquo;In her uncontrollable anger she seized a chair and
+threw it at me.&rdquo;</p>
+<h3>3.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">Punishment of Mr. Home&rsquo;s
+Aunt</span></h3>
+<p>&ldquo;Upon one occasion as the table was being thus moved
+about of itself, my aunt brought the family Bible, and placing it
+on the table, said, &lsquo;There, that will soon drive the devils
+away&rsquo;; but to her astonishment the table only moved in a
+more lively manner, as if pleased to bear such a
+burden.&rdquo;&nbsp; (We believe this is constantly observed in
+pulpits and church reading desks, which are invariably
+lively.)&nbsp; &ldquo;Seeing this she was greatly incensed, and
+determined to stop it, she angrily placed her whole weight on the
+table, and was actually lifted up with it bodily from the
+floor.&rdquo;</p>
+<h3>4. <span class="smcap">Triumphant Effect of this Discipline
+on Mr. Home&rsquo;s Aunt</span></h3>
+<p>&ldquo;And she felt it a duty that I should leave her house,
+and which I did.&rdquo;</p>
+<h3>5.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">Mr. Home&rsquo;s
+Mission</span></h3>
+<p>It was communicated to him by the spirit of his mother, in the
+following terms: &ldquo;Daniel, fear not, my child, God is with
+you, and who shall be against you?&nbsp; Seek to do good: be
+truthful and truth-loving, and you will prosper, my child.&nbsp;
+Yours is a glorious mission&mdash;you will convince the infidel,
+cure the sick, and console the weeping.&rdquo;&nbsp; It is a
+coincidence that another eminent man, with several missions,
+heard a voice from the Heavens blessing him, when he also was a
+youth, and saying, &ldquo;You will be rewarded, my son, in
+time&rdquo;.&nbsp; This Medium was the celebrated Baron
+Munchausen, who relates the experience in the opening of the
+second chapter of the incidents in <i>his</i> life.</p>
+<h3>6.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">Modest Success of Mr.
+Home&rsquo;s Mission</span></h3>
+<p>&ldquo;Certainly these phenomena, whether from God or from the
+devil, have in ten years caused more converts to the great truths
+of immortality and angel communion, with all that flows from
+these great facts, than all the sects in Christendom have made
+during the same period.&rdquo;</p>
+<h3>7.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">What the First Composers say of
+the Spirit-Music, to Mr. Home</span></h3>
+<p>&ldquo;As to the music, it has been my good fortune to be on
+intimate terms with some of the first composers of the day, and
+more than one of them have said of such as they have heard, that
+it is such music as only angels could make, and no man could
+write it.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>These &ldquo;first composers&rdquo; are not more particularly
+named.&nbsp; We shall therefore be happy to receive and file at
+the office of this Journal, the testimonials in the foregoing
+terms of Dr. Sterndale Bennett, Mr. Balfe, Mr. Macfarren, Mr.
+Benedict, Mr. Vincent Wallace, Signor Costa, M. Auber, M. Gounod,
+Signor Rossini, and Signor Verdi.&nbsp; We shall also feel
+obliged to Mr. Alfred Mellon, who is no doubt constantly studying
+this wonderful music, under the Medium&rsquo;s auspices, if he
+will note on paper, from memory, say a single sheet of the
+same.&nbsp; Signor Giulio Regondi will then perform it, as
+correctly as a mere mortal can, on the Accordion, at the next
+ensuing concert of the Philharmonic Society; on which occasion
+the before-mentioned testimonials will be conspicuously displayed
+in the front of the orchestra.</p>
+<h3>8.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">Mr. Home&rsquo;s Miraculous
+Infant</span></h3>
+<p>&ldquo;On the 26th April, old style, or 8th May, according to
+our style, at seven in the evening, and as the snow was fast
+falling, our little boy was born at the town house, situate on
+the Gagarines Quay, in St. Petersburg, where we were still
+staying.&nbsp; A few hours after his birth, his mother, the
+nurse, and I heard for several hours the warbling of a bird as if
+singing over him.&nbsp; Also that night, and for two or three
+nights afterwards, a bright starlike light, which was clearly
+visible from the partial darkness of the room, in which there was
+only a night-lamp burning, appeared several times directly I over
+its head, where it remained for some moments, and then slowly
+moved in the direction of the door, where it disappeared.&nbsp;
+This was also seen by each of us at the same time.&nbsp; The
+light was more condensed than those which have been so often seen
+in my presence upon previous and subsequent occasions.&nbsp; It
+was brighter and more distinctly globular.&nbsp; I do not believe
+that it came through my mediumship, but rather through that of
+the child, who has manifested on several occasions the presence
+of the gift.&nbsp; I do not like to allude to such a matter, but
+as there are more strange things in Heaven and earth than are
+dreamt of, even in my philosophy, I do not feel myself at liberty
+to omit stating, that during the latter part of my wife&rsquo;s
+pregnancy, we thought it better that she should not join in
+S&eacute;ances, because it was found that whenever the rappings
+occurred in the room, a simultaneous movement of the child was
+distinctly felt, perfectly in unison with the sounds.&nbsp; When
+there were three sounds, three movements were felt, and so on,
+and when five sounds were heard, which is generally the call for
+the alphabet, she felt the five internal movements, and she would
+frequently, when we were mistaken in the latter, correct us from
+what the child indicated.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>We should ask pardon of our readers for sullying our paper
+with this nauseous matter, if without it they could adequately
+understand what Mr. Home&rsquo;s book is.</p>
+<h3>9.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">Cagliostro&rsquo;s Spirit calls
+on Mr. Home</span></h3>
+<p>Prudently avoiding the disagreeable question of his giving
+himself, both in this state of existence and in his spiritual
+circle, a name to which he never had any pretensions whatever,
+and likewise prudently suppressing any reference to his amiable
+weakness as a swindler and an infamous trafficker in his own
+wife, the guileless Mr. Balsamo delivered, in a &ldquo;distinct
+voice&rdquo;, this distinct celestial
+utterance&mdash;unquestionably punctuated in a supernatural
+manner: &ldquo;My power was that of a mesmerist, but
+all-misunderstood by those about me, my biographers have even
+done me injustice, but I care not for the untruths of
+earth&rdquo;.</p>
+<h3>10.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">Oracular state of Mr.
+Home</span></h3>
+<p>&ldquo;After various manifestations, Mr. Home went into the
+trance, and addressing a person present, said, &lsquo;You ask
+what good are such trivial manifestations, such as rapping,
+table-moving, etc.?&nbsp; God is a better judge than we are what
+is fitted for humanity, immense results may spring from trivial
+things.&nbsp; The steam from a kettle is a small thing, but look
+at the locomotive!&nbsp; The electric spark from the back of a
+cat is a small thing, but see the wonders of electricity!&nbsp;
+The raps are small things, but their results will lead you to the
+Spirit-World, and to eternity!&nbsp; Why should great results
+spring from such small causes?&nbsp; Christ was born in a manger,
+he was not born a King.&nbsp; When you tell me why he was born in
+a manger, I will tell you why these manifestations, so trivial,
+so undignified as they appear to you, have been appointed to
+convince the world of the truth of
+spiritualism.&rsquo;&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Wonderful!&nbsp; Clearly direct Inspiration!&mdash;And yet,
+perhaps, hardly worth the trouble of going &ldquo;into the
+trance&rdquo; for, either.&nbsp; Amazing as the revelation is, we
+seem to have heard something like it from more than one personage
+who was wide awake.&nbsp; A quack doctor, in an open barouche
+(attended by a barrel-organ and two footmen in brass helmets),
+delivered just such another address within our hearing, outside a
+gate of Paris, not two months ago.</p>
+<h3>11.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">The Testimony of Mr.
+Home&rsquo;s Boots</span></h3>
+<p>&ldquo;The lady of the house turned to me and said abruptly,
+&lsquo;Why, you are sitting in the air&rsquo;; and on looking, we
+found that the chair remained in its place, but that I was
+elevated two or three inches above it, and my feet not touching
+the floor.&nbsp; This may show how utterly unconscious I am at
+times to the sensation of levitation.&nbsp; As is usual, when I
+had not got above the level of the heads of those about me, and
+when they change their position much&mdash;as they frequently do
+in looking wistfully at such a phenomenon&mdash;I came down
+again, but not till I had remained so raised about half a minute
+from the time of its being first seen.&nbsp; I was now impressed
+to leave the table, and was soon carried to the lofty
+ceiling.&nbsp; The Count de B&mdash; left his place at the table,
+and coming under where I was, said, &lsquo;Now, young Home, come
+and let me touch your feet.&rsquo;&nbsp; I told him I had no
+volition in the matter, but perhaps the spirits would kindly
+allow me to come down to him.&nbsp; They did so, by floating me
+down to him, and my feet were soon in his outstretched
+hands.&nbsp; He seized my boots, and now I was again elevated, he
+holding tightly, and pulling at my feet, till the boots I wore,
+which had elastic sides, came off and remained in his
+hands.&rdquo;</p>
+<h3>12.&nbsp; <span class="smcap">The uncombative Nature of Mr.
+Home</span></h3>
+<p>As there is a maudlin complaint in this book, about men of
+Science being hard upon &ldquo;the &lsquo;Orphan&rsquo;
+Home&rdquo;, and as the &ldquo;gentle and uncombative
+nature&rdquo; of this Medium in a martyred point of view is
+pathetically commented on by the anonymous literary friend who
+supplies him with an introduction and appendix&mdash;rather at
+odds with Mr. Howitt, who is so mightily triumphant about the
+same Martyr&rsquo;s reception by crowned heads, and about the
+competence he has become endowed with&mdash;we cull from Mr.
+Home&rsquo;s book one or two little illustrative flowers.&nbsp;
+Sir David Brewster (a pestilent unbeliever) &ldquo;has come
+before the public in few matters which have brought more shame
+upon him than his conduct and assertions on this occasion, in
+which he manifested not only a disregard for truth, but also a
+disloyalty to scientific observation, and to the use of his own
+eyesight and natural faculties&rdquo;.&nbsp; The same unhappy Sir
+David Brewster&rsquo;s &ldquo;character may be the better known,
+not only for his untruthful dealing with this subject, but also
+in his own domain of science in which the same unfaithfulness to
+truth will be seen to be the characteristic of his
+mind&rdquo;.&nbsp; Again, he &ldquo;is really not a man over whom
+victory is any honour&rdquo;.&nbsp; Again, &ldquo;not only he,
+but Professor Faraday have had time and ample leisure to regret
+that they should have so foolishly pledged themselves&rdquo;,
+etc.&nbsp; A Faraday a fool in the sight of a Home!&nbsp; That
+unjust judge and whited wall, Lord Brougham, has his share of
+this Martyr Medium&rsquo;s uncombativeness.&nbsp; &ldquo;In order
+that he might not be compelled to deny Sir David&rsquo;s
+statements, he found it necessary that he should be silent, and I
+have some reason to complain that his Lordship preferred
+sacrificing me to his desire not to immolate his
+friend.&rdquo;&nbsp; M. Arago also came off with very doubtful
+honours from a wrestle with the uncombative Martyr; who is
+perfectly clear (and so are we, let us add) that scientific men
+are not the men for his purpose.&nbsp; Of course, he is the butt
+of &ldquo;utter and acknowledged ignorance&rdquo;, and of
+&ldquo;the most gross and foolish statements&rdquo;, and of
+&ldquo;the unjust and dishonest&rdquo;, and of &ldquo;the
+press-gang&rdquo;, and of crowds of other alien and combative
+adjectives, participles, and substantives.</p>
+<p>Nothing is without its use, and even this odious book may do
+some service.&nbsp; Not because it coolly claims for the writer
+and his disciples such powers as were wielded by the Saviour and
+the Apostles; not because it sees no difference between twelve
+table rappers in these days, and &ldquo;twelve fishermen&rdquo;
+in those; not because it appeals for precedents to statements
+extracted from the most ignorant and wretched of mankind, by
+cruel torture, and constantly withdrawn when the torture was
+withdrawn; not because it sets forth such a strange confusion of
+ideas as is presented by one of the faithful when, writing of a
+certain sprig of geranium handed by an invisible hand, he adds in
+ecstasies, &ldquo;<i>which we have planted and it is growing</i>,
+<i>so that it is no delusion</i>, <i>no fairy money turned into
+dross or leaves</i>&rdquo;&mdash;as if it followed that the
+conjuror&rsquo;s half-crowns really did become invisible and in
+that state fly, because he afterwards cuts them out of a real
+orange; or as if the conjuror&rsquo;s pigeon, being after the
+discharge of his gun, a real live pigeon fluttering on the
+target, must therefore conclusively be a pigeon, fired, whole,
+living and unshattered, out of the gun!&mdash;not because of the
+exposure of any of these weaknesses, or a thousand such, are
+these moving incidents in the life of the Martyr Medium, and
+similar productions, likely to prove useful, but because of their
+uniform abuse of those who go to test the reality of these
+alleged phenomena, and who come away incredulous.&nbsp; There is
+an old homely proverb concerning pitch and its adhesive
+character, which we hope this significant circumstance may
+impress on many minds.&nbsp; The writer of these lines has lately
+heard overmuch touching young men of promise in the imaginative
+arts, &ldquo;towards whom&rdquo; Martyr Mediums assisting at
+evening parties feel themselves &ldquo;drawn&rdquo;.&nbsp; It may
+be a hint to such young men to stick to their own drawing, as
+being of a much better kind, and to leave Martyr Mediums alone in
+their glory.</p>
+<p>As there is a good deal in these books about &ldquo;lying
+spirits&rdquo;, we will conclude by putting a hypothetical
+case.&nbsp; Supposing that a Medium (Martyr or otherwise) were
+established for a time in the house of an English gentleman
+abroad; say, somewhere in Italy.&nbsp; Supposing that the more
+marvellous the Medium became, the more suspicious of him the lady
+of the house became.&nbsp; Supposing that the lady, her distrust
+once aroused, were particularly struck by the Medium&rsquo;s
+exhibiting a persistent desire to commit her, somehow or other,
+to the disclosure of the manner of the death, to him unknown, of
+a certain person.&nbsp; Supposing that she at length resolved to
+test the Medium on this head, and, therefore, on a certain
+evening mentioned a wholly supposititious manner of death (which
+was not the real manner of death, nor anything at all like it)
+within the range of his listening ears.&nbsp; And supposing that
+a spirit presently afterwards rapped out its presence, claiming
+to be the spirit of that deceased person, and claiming to have
+departed this life in that supposititious way.&nbsp; Would that
+be a lying spirit?&nbsp; Or would it he a something else,
+tainting all that Medium&rsquo;s statements and suppressions,
+even if they were not in themselves of a manifestly outrageous
+character?</p>
+<h2><a name="page516"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 516</span>THE
+LATE MR. STANFIELD</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">Every</span> Artist, be he writer,
+painter, musician, or actor, must bear his private sorrows as he
+best can, and must separate them from the exercise of his public
+pursuit.&nbsp; But it sometimes happens, in compensation, that
+his private loss of a dear friend represents a loss on the part
+of the whole community.&nbsp; Then he may, without obtrusion of
+his individuality, step forth to lay his little wreath upon that
+dear friend&rsquo;s grave.</p>
+<p>On Saturday, the eighteenth of this present month, Clarkson
+Stanfield died.&nbsp; On the afternoon of that day, England lost
+the great marine painter of whom she will be boastful ages hence;
+the National Historian of her speciality, the Sea; the man famous
+in all countries for his marvellous rendering of the waves that
+break upon her shores, of her ships and seamen, of her coasts and
+skies, of her storms and sunshine, of the many marvels of the
+deep.&nbsp; He who holds the oceans in the hollow of His hand had
+given, associated with them, wonderful gifts into his keeping; he
+had used them well through threescore and fourteen years; and, on
+the afternoon of that spring day, relinquished them for ever.</p>
+<p>It is superfluous to record that the painter of &ldquo;The
+Battle of Trafalgar&rdquo;, of the &ldquo;<i>Victory</i> being
+towed into Gibraltar with the body of Nelson on Board&rdquo;, of
+&ldquo;The Morning after the Wreck&rdquo;, of &ldquo;The
+Abandoned&rdquo;, of fifty more such works, died in his
+seventy-fourth year, &ldquo;Mr.&rdquo; Stanfield.&mdash;He was an
+Englishman.</p>
+<p>Those grand pictures will proclaim his powers while paint and
+canvas last.&nbsp; But the writer of these words had been his
+friend for thirty years; and when, a short week or two before his
+death, he laid that once so skilful hand upon the writer&rsquo;s
+breast and told him they would meet again, &ldquo;but not
+here&rdquo;, the thoughts of the latter turned, for the time, so
+little to his noble genius, and so much to his noble nature!</p>
+<p>He was the soul of frankness, generosity, and
+simplicity.&nbsp; The most genial, the most affectionate, the
+most loving, and the most lovable of men.&nbsp; Success had never
+for an instant spoiled him.&nbsp; His interest in the Theatre as
+an Institution&mdash;the best picturesqueness of which may be
+said to be wholly due to him&mdash;was faithful to the
+last.&nbsp; His belief in a Play, his delight in one, the ease
+with which it moved him to tears or to laughter, were most
+remarkable evidences of the heart he must have put into his old
+theatrical work, and of the thorough purpose and sincerity with
+which it must have been done.&nbsp; The writer was very
+intimately associated with him in some amateur plays; and day
+after day, and night after night, there were the same
+unquenchable freshness, enthusiasm, and impressibility in him,
+though broken in health, even then.</p>
+<p>No Artist can ever have stood by his art with a quieter
+dignity than he always did.&nbsp; Nothing would have induced him
+to lay it at the feet of any human creature.&nbsp; To fawn, or to
+toady, or to do undeserved homage to any one, was an absolute
+impossibility with him.&nbsp; And yet his character was so nicely
+balanced that he was the last man in the world to be suspected of
+self-assertion, and his modesty was one of his most special
+qualities.</p>
+<p>He was a charitable, religious, gentle, truly good man.&nbsp;
+A genuine man, incapable of pretence or of concealment.&nbsp; He
+had been a sailor once; and all the best characteristics that are
+popularly attributed to sailors, being his, and being in him
+refined by the influences of his Art, formed a whole not likely
+to be often seen.&nbsp; There is no smile that the writer can
+recall, like his; no manner so naturally confiding and so
+cheerfully engaging.&nbsp; When the writer saw him for the last
+time on earth, the smile and the manner shone out once through
+the weakness, still: the bright unchanging Soul within the
+altered face and form.</p>
+<p>No man was ever held in higher respect by his friends, and yet
+his intimate friends invariably addressed him and spoke of him by
+a pet name.&nbsp; It may need, perhaps, the writer&rsquo;s memory
+and associations to find in this a touching expression of his
+winning character, his playful smile, and pleasant ways.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;You know Mrs. Inchbald&rsquo;s story, Nature and
+Art?&rdquo; wrote Thomas Hood, once, in a letter: &ldquo;What a
+fine Edition of Nature and Art is Stanfield!&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Gone!&nbsp; And many and many a dear old day gone with
+him!&nbsp; But their memories remain.&nbsp; And his memory will
+not soon fade out, for he has set his mark upon the restless
+waters, and his fame will long be sounded in the roar of the
+sea.</p>
+<h2><a name="page518"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 518</span>A
+SLIGHT QUESTION OF FACT</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> is never well for the public
+interest that the originator of any social reform should be soon
+forgotten.&nbsp; Further, it is neither wholesome nor right
+(being neither generous nor just) that the merit of his work
+should be gradually transferred elsewhere.</p>
+<p>Some few weeks ago, our contemporary, the <i>Pall Mall
+Gazette</i>, in certain strictures on our Theatres which we are
+very far indeed from challenging, remarked on the first effectual
+discouragement of an outrage upon decency which the lobbies and
+upper-boxes of even our best Theatres habitually paraded within
+the last twenty or thirty years.&nbsp; From those remarks it
+might appear as though no such Manager of Covent Garden or Drury
+Lane as Mr. Macready had ever existed.</p>
+<p>It is a fact beyond all possibility of question, that Mr.
+Macready, on assuming the management of Covent Garden Theatre in
+1837, did instantly set himself, regardless of precedent and
+custom down to that hour obtaining, rigidly to suppress this
+shameful thing, and did rigidly suppress and crush it during his
+whole management of that theatre, and during his whole subsequent
+management of Drury Lane.&nbsp; That he did so, as certainly
+without favour as without fear; that he did so, against his own
+immediate interests; that he did so, against vexations and
+oppositions which might have cooled the ardour of a less earnest
+man, or a less devoted artist; can be better known to no one than
+the writer of the present words, whose name stands at the head of
+these pages.</p>
+<h2><a name="page519"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+519</span>LANDOR&rsquo;S LIFE</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">Prefixed</span> to the second volume of
+Mr. Forster&rsquo;s admirable biography of Walter Savage Landor,
+<a name="citation519"></a><a href="#footnote519"
+class="citation">[519]</a> is an engraving from a portrait of
+that remarkable man when seventy-seven years of age, by
+Boxall.&nbsp; The writer of these lines can testify that the
+original picture is a singularly good likeness, the result of
+close and subtle observation on the part of the painter; but, for
+this very reason, the engraving gives a most inadequate idea of
+the merit of the picture and the character of the man.</p>
+<p>From the engraving, the arms and hands are omitted.&nbsp; In
+the picture, they are, as they were in nature, indispensable to a
+correct reading of the vigorous face.&nbsp; The arms were very
+peculiar.&nbsp; They were rather short, and were curiously
+restrained and checked in their action at the elbows; in the
+action of the hands, even when separately clenched, there was the
+same kind of pause, and a noticeable tendency to relaxation on
+the part of the thumb.&nbsp; Let the face be never so intense or
+fierce, there was a commentary of gentleness in the hands,
+essential to be taken along with it.&nbsp; Like Hamlet, Landor
+would speak daggers, but use none.&nbsp; In the expression of his
+hands, though angrily closed, there was always gentleness and
+tenderness; just as when they were open, and the handsome old
+gentleman would wave them with a little courtly flourish that sat
+well upon him, as he recalled some classic compliment that he had
+rendered to some reigning Beauty, there was a chivalrous grace
+about them such as pervades his softer verses.&nbsp; Thus the
+fictitious Mr. Boythorn (to whom we may refer without impropriety
+in this connexion, as Mr. Forster does) declaims &ldquo;with
+unimaginable energy&rdquo; the while his bird is &ldquo;perched
+upon his thumb&rdquo;, and he &ldquo;softly smooths its feathers
+with his forefinger&rdquo;.</p>
+<p>From the spirit of Mr. Forster&rsquo;s Biography these
+characteristic hands are never omitted, and hence (apart from its
+literary merits) its great value.&nbsp; As the same masterly
+writer&rsquo;s <i>Life and Times of Oliver Goldsmith</i> is a
+generous and yet conscientious picture of a period, so this is a
+not less generous and yet conscientious picture of one life; of a
+life, with all its aspirations, achievements, and
+disappointments; all its capabilities, opportunities, and
+irretrievable mistakes.&nbsp; It is essentially a sad book, and
+herein lies proof of its truth and worth.&nbsp; The life of
+almost any man possessing great gifts, would be a sad book to
+himself; and this book enables us not only to see its subject,
+but to be its subject, if we will.</p>
+<p>Mr. Forster is of opinion that &ldquo;Landor&rsquo;s fame very
+surely awaits him&rdquo;.&nbsp; This point admitted or doubted,
+the value of the book remains the same.&nbsp; It needs not to
+know his works (otherwise than through his biographer&rsquo;s
+exposition), it needs not to have known himself, to find a deep
+interest in these pages.&nbsp; More or less of their warning is
+in every conscience; and some admiration of a fine genius, and of
+a great, wild, generous nature, incapable of mean
+self-extenuation or dissimulation&mdash;if unhappily incapable of
+self-repression too&mdash;should be in every breast.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;There may be still living many persons&rdquo;, Walter
+Landor&rsquo;s brother, Robert, writes to Mr. Forster of this
+book, &ldquo;who would contradict any narrative of yours in which
+the best qualities were remembered, the worst
+forgotten.&rdquo;&nbsp; Mr. Forster&rsquo;s comment is: &ldquo;I
+had not waited for this appeal to resolve, that, if this memoir
+were written at all, it should contain, as far as might lie
+within my power, a fair statement of the truth&rdquo;.&nbsp; And
+this eloquent passage of truth immediately follows: &ldquo;Few of
+his infirmities are without something kindly or generous about
+them; and we are not long in discovering there is nothing so
+wildly incredible that he will not himself in perfect good faith
+believe.&nbsp; When he published his first book of poems on
+quitting Oxford, the profits were to be reserved for a distressed
+clergyman.&nbsp; When he published his Latin poems, the poor of
+Leipzig were to have the sum they realised.&nbsp; When his comedy
+was ready to be acted, a Spaniard who had sheltered him at Castro
+was to be made richer by it.&nbsp; When he competed for the prize
+of the Academy of Stockholm, it was to go to the poor of
+Sweden.&nbsp; If nobody got anything from any one of these
+enterprises, the fault at all events was not his.&nbsp; With his
+extraordinary power of forgetting disappointments, he was
+prepared at each successive failure to start afresh, as if each
+had been a triumph.&nbsp; I shall have to delineate this
+peculiarity as strongly in the last half as in the first half of
+his life, and it was certainly an amiable one.&nbsp; He was ready
+at all times to set aside, out of his own possessions, something
+for somebody who might please him for the time; and when
+frailties of temper and tongue are noted, this other eccentricity
+should not be omitted.&nbsp; He desired eagerly the love as well
+as the good opinion of those whom for the time he esteemed, and
+no one was more affectionate while under such influences.&nbsp;
+It is not a small virtue to feel such genuine pleasure, as he
+always did in giving and receiving pleasure.&nbsp; His
+generosity, too, was bestowed chiefly on those who could make
+small acknowledgment in thanks and no return in kind.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Some of his earlier contemporaries may have thought him a vain
+man.&nbsp; Most assuredly he was not, in the common acceptation
+of the term.&nbsp; A vain man has little or no admiration to
+bestow upon competitors.&nbsp; Landor had an inexhaustible
+fund.&nbsp; He thought well of his writings, or he would not have
+preserved them.&nbsp; He said and wrote that he thought well of
+them, because that was his mind about them, and he said and wrote
+his mind.&nbsp; He was one of the few men of whom you might
+always know the whole: of whom you might always know the worst,
+as well as the best.&nbsp; He had no reservations or
+duplicities.&nbsp; &ldquo;No, by Heaven!&rdquo; he would say
+(&ldquo;with unimaginable energy&rdquo;), if any good adjective
+were coupled with him which he did not deserve: &ldquo;I am
+nothing of the kind.&nbsp; I wish I were; but I don&rsquo;t
+deserve the attribute, and I never did, and I never
+shall!&rdquo;&nbsp; His intense consciousness of himself never
+led to his poorly excusing himself, and seldom to his violently
+asserting himself.&nbsp; When he told some little story of his
+bygone social experiences, in Florence, or where not, as he was
+fond of doing, it took the innocent form of making all the
+interlocutors, Landors.&nbsp; It was observable, too, that they
+always called him &ldquo;Mr. Landor&rdquo;&mdash;rather
+ceremoniously and submissively.&nbsp; There was a certain
+&ldquo;Caro P&aacute;dre Ab&aacute;te
+Marina&rdquo;&mdash;invariably so addressed in these
+anecdotes&mdash;who figured through a great many of them, and who
+always expressed himself in this deferential tone.</p>
+<p>Mr. Forster writes of Landor&rsquo;s character thus:</p>
+<blockquote><p>&ldquo;A man must be judged, at first, by what he
+says and does.&nbsp; But with him such extravagance as I have
+referred to was little more than the habitual indulgence (on such
+themes) of passionate feelings and language, indecent indeed but
+utterly purposeless; the mere explosion of wrath provoked by
+tyranny or cruelty; the irregularities of an overheated
+steam-engine too weak for its own vapour.&nbsp; It is very
+certain that no one could detest oppression more truly than
+Landor did in all seasons and times; and if no one expressed that
+scorn, that abhorrence of tyranny and fraud, more hastily or more
+intemperately, all his fire and fury signified really little else
+than ill-temper too easily provoked.&nbsp; Not to justify or
+excuse such language, but to explain it, this consideration is
+urged.&nbsp; If not uniformly placable, Landor was always
+compassionate.&nbsp; He was tender-hearted rather than
+bloody-minded at all times, and upon only the most partial
+acquaintance with his writings could other opinion be
+formed.&nbsp; A completer knowledge of them would satisfy any one
+that he had as little real disposition to kill a king as to kill
+a mouse.&nbsp; In fact there is not a more marked peculiarity in
+his genius than the union with its strength of a most uncommon
+gentleness, and in the personal ways of the man this was equally
+manifest.&rdquo;&mdash;Vol. i. p. 496.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<p>Of his works, thus:</p>
+<blockquote><p>&ldquo;Though his mind was cast in the antique
+mould, it had opened itself to every kind of impression through a
+long and varied life; he has written with equal excellence in
+both poetry and prose, which can hardly be said of any of his
+contemporaries; and perhaps the single epithet by which his books
+would be best described is that reserved exclusively for books
+not characterised only by genius, but also by special
+individuality.&nbsp; They are unique.&nbsp; Having possessed
+them, we should miss them.&nbsp; Their place would be supplied by
+no others.&nbsp; They have that about them, moreover, which
+renders it almost certain that they will frequently be resorted
+to in future time.&nbsp; There are none in the language more
+quotable.&nbsp; Even where impulsiveness and want of patience
+have left them most fragmentary, this rich compensation is
+offered to the reader.&nbsp; There is hardly a conceivable
+subject, in life or literature, which they do not illustrate by
+striking aphorisms, by concise and profound observations, by
+wisdom ever applicable to the deeds of men, and by wit as
+available for their enjoyment.&nbsp; Nor, above all, will there
+anywhere be found a more pervading passion for liberty, a fiercer
+hatred of the base, a wider sympathy with the wronged and the
+oppressed, or help more ready at all times for those who fight at
+odds and disadvantage against the powerful and the fortunate,
+than in the writings of Walter Savage Landor.&rdquo;&mdash;Last
+page of second volume.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<p>The impression was strong upon the present writer&rsquo;s
+mind, as on Mr. Forster&rsquo;s, during years of close friendship
+with the subject of this biography, that his animosities were
+chiefly referable to the singular inability in him to dissociate
+other people&rsquo;s ways of thinking from his own.&nbsp; He had,
+to the last, a ludicrous grievance (both Mr. Forster and the
+writer have often amused themselves with it) against a
+good-natured nobleman, doubtless perfectly unconscious of having
+ever given him offence.&nbsp; The offence was, that on the
+occasion of some dinner party in another nobleman&rsquo;s house,
+many years before, this innocent lord (then a commoner) had
+passed in to dinner, through some door, before him, as he himself
+was about to pass in through that same door with a lady on his
+arm.&nbsp; Now, Landor was a gentleman of most scrupulous
+politeness, and in his carriage of himself towards ladies there
+was a certain mixture of stateliness and deference, belonging to
+quite another time, and, as Mr. Pepys would observe,
+&ldquo;mighty pretty to see&rdquo;.&nbsp; If he could by any
+effort imagine himself committing such a high crime and
+misdemeanour as that in question, he could only imagine himself
+as doing it of a set purpose, under the sting of some vast
+injury, to inflict a great affront.&nbsp; A deliberately designed
+affront on the part of another man, it therefore remained to the
+end of his days.&nbsp; The manner in which, as time went on, he
+permeated the unfortunate lord&rsquo;s ancestry with this
+offence, was whimsically characteristic of Landor.&nbsp; The
+writer remembers very well when only the individual himself was
+held responsible in the story for the breach of good breeding;
+but in another ten years or so, it began to appear that his
+father had always been remarkable for ill manners; and in yet
+another ten years or so, his grandfather developed into quite a
+prodigy of coarse behaviour.</p>
+<p>Mr. Boythorn&mdash;if he may again be quoted&mdash;said of his
+adversary, Sir Leicester Dedlock: &ldquo;That fellow is, <i>and
+his father was</i>, <i>and his grandfather was</i>, the most
+stiff-necked, arrogant, imbecile, pig-headed numskull, ever, by
+some inexplicable mistake of Nature, born in any station of life
+but a walking-stick&rsquo;s!&rdquo;</p>
+<p>The strength of some of Mr. Landor&rsquo;s most captivating
+kind qualities was traceable to the same source.&nbsp; Knowing
+how keenly he himself would feel the being at any small social
+disadvantage, or the being unconsciously placed in any ridiculous
+light, he was wonderfully considerate of shy people, or of such
+as might be below the level of his usual conversation, or
+otherwise out of their element.&nbsp; The writer once observed
+him in the keenest distress of mind in behalf of a modest young
+stranger who came into a drawing-room with a glove on his
+head.&nbsp; An expressive commentary on this sympathetic
+condition, and on the delicacy with which he advanced to the
+young stranger&rsquo;s rescue, was afterwards furnished by
+himself at a friendly dinner at Gore House, when it was the most
+delightful of houses.&nbsp; His dress&mdash;say, his cravat or
+shirt-collar&mdash;had become slightly disarranged on a hot
+evening, and Count D&rsquo;Orsay laughingly called his attention
+to the circumstance as we rose from table.&nbsp; Landor became
+flushed, and greatly agitated: &ldquo;My dear Count
+D&rsquo;Orsay, I thank you!&nbsp; My dear Count D&rsquo;Orsay, I
+thank you from my soul for pointing out to me the abominable
+condition to which I am reduced!&nbsp; If I had entered the
+Drawing-room, and presented myself before Lady Blessington in so
+absurd a light, I would have instantly gone home, put a pistol to
+my head, and blown my brains out!&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Mr. Forster tells a similar story of his keeping a company
+waiting dinner, through losing his way; and of his seeing no
+remedy for that breach of politeness but cutting his throat, or
+drowning himself, unless a countryman whom he met could direct
+him by a short road to the house where the party were
+assembled.&nbsp; Surely these are expressive notes on the gravity
+and reality of his explosive inclinations to kill kings!</p>
+<p>His manner towards boys was charming, and the earnestness of
+his wish to be on equal terms with them and to win their
+confidence was quite touching.&nbsp; Few, reading Mr.
+Forster&rsquo;s book, can fall to see in this, his pensive
+remembrance of that &ldquo;studious wilful boy at once shy and
+impetuous&rdquo;, who had not many intimacies at Rugby, but who
+was &ldquo;generally popular and respected, and used his
+influence often to save the younger boys from undue harshness or
+violence&rdquo;.&nbsp; The impulsive yearnings of his passionate
+heart towards his own boy, on their meeting at Bath, after years
+of separation, likewise burn through this phase of his
+character.</p>
+<p>But a more spiritual, softened, and unselfish aspect of it,
+was to derived from his respectful belief in happiness which he
+himself had missed.&nbsp; His marriage had not been a felicitous
+one&mdash;it may be fairly assumed for either side&mdash;but no
+trace of bitterness or distrust concerning other marriages was in
+his mind.&nbsp; He was never more serene than in the midst of a
+domestic circle, and was invariably remarkable for a perfectly
+benignant interest in young couples and young lovers.&nbsp; That,
+in his ever-fresh fancy, he conceived in this association
+innumerable histories of himself involving far more unlikely
+events that never happened than Isaac D&rsquo;Israeli ever
+imagined, is hardly to be doubted; but as to this part of his
+real history he was mute, or revealed his nobleness in an impulse
+to be generously just.&nbsp; We verge on delicate ground, but a
+slight remembrance rises in the writer which can grate
+nowhere.&nbsp; Mr. Forster relates how a certain friend, being in
+Florence, sent him home a leaf from the garden of his old house
+at Fiesole.&nbsp; That friend had first asked him what he should
+send him home, and he had stipulated for this gift&mdash;found by
+Mr. Forster among his papers after his death.&nbsp; The friend,
+on coming back to England, related to Landor that he had been
+much embarrassed, on going in search of the leaf, by his
+driver&rsquo;s suddenly stopping his horses in a narrow lane, and
+presenting him (the friend) to &ldquo;La Signora
+Landora&rdquo;.&nbsp; The lady was walking alone on a bright
+Italian-winter-day; and the man, having been told to drive to the
+Villa Landora, inferred that he must be conveying a guest or
+visitor.&nbsp; &ldquo;I pulled off my hat,&rdquo; said the
+friend, &ldquo;apologised for the coachman&rsquo;s mistake, and
+drove on.&nbsp; The lady was walking with a rapid and firm step,
+had bright eyes, a fine fresh colour, and looked animated and
+agreeable.&rdquo;&nbsp; Landor checked off each clause of the
+description, with a stately nod of more than ready assent, and
+replied, with all his tremendous energy concentrated into the
+sentence: &ldquo;And the Lord forbid that I should do otherwise
+than declare that she always <span class="GutSmall">WAS</span>
+agreeable&mdash;to every one but <i>me</i>!&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Mr. Forster step by step builds up the evidence on which he
+writes this life and states this character.&nbsp; In like manner,
+he gives the evidence for his high estimation of Landor&rsquo;s
+works, and&mdash;it may be added&mdash;for their recompense
+against some neglect, in finding so sympathetic, acute, and
+devoted a champion.&nbsp; Nothing in the book is more remarkable
+than his examination of each of Landor&rsquo;s successive pieces
+of writing, his delicate discernment of their beauties, and his
+strong desire to impart his own perceptions in this wise to the
+great audience that is yet to come.&nbsp; It rarely befalls an
+author to have such a commentator: to become the subject of so
+much artistic skill and knowledge, combined with such infinite
+and loving pains.&nbsp; Alike as a piece of Biography, and as a
+commentary upon the beauties of a great writer, the book is a
+massive book; as the man and the writer were massive too.&nbsp;
+Sometimes, when the balance held by Mr. Forster has seemed for a
+moment to turn a little heavily against the infirmities of
+temperament of a grand old friend, we have felt something of a
+shock; but we have not once been able to gainsay the justice of
+the scales.&nbsp; This feeling, too, has only fluttered out of
+the detail, here or there, and has vanished before the
+whole.&nbsp; We fully agree with Mr. Forster that &ldquo;judgment
+has been passed&rdquo;&mdash;as it should be&mdash;&ldquo;with an
+equal desire to be only just on all the qualities of his
+temperament which affected necessarily not his own life
+only.&nbsp; But, now that the story is told, no one will have
+difficulty in striking the balance between its good and ill; and
+what was really imperishable in Landor&rsquo;s genius will not be
+treasured less, or less understood, for the more perfect
+knowledge of his character&rdquo;.</p>
+<p>Mr. Forster&rsquo;s second volume gives a facsimile of
+Landor&rsquo;s writing at seventy-five.&nbsp; It may be
+interesting to those who are curious in calligraphy, to know that
+its resemblance to the recent handwriting of that great genius,
+M. Victor Hugo, is singularly strong.</p>
+<p>In a military burial-ground in India, the name of Walter
+Landor is associated with the present writer&rsquo;s over the
+grave of a young officer.&nbsp; No name could stand there, more
+inseparably associated in the writer&rsquo;s mind with the
+dignity of generosity: with a noble scorn of all littleness, all
+cruelty, oppression, fraud, and false pretence.</p>
+<h2><a name="page526"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+526</span>ADDRESS WHICH APPEARED SHORTLY PREVIOUS TO THE
+COMPLETION OF THE TWENTIETH VOLUME (1868), INTIMATING A NEW
+SERIES OF &ldquo;ALL THE YEAR ROUND&rdquo;</h2>
+<p>I <span class="smcap">beg</span> to announce to the readers of
+this Journal, that on the completion of the Twentieth Volume on
+the Twenty-eighth of November, in the present year, I shall
+commence an entirely New Series of <i>All the Year
+Round</i>.&nbsp; The change is not only due to the convenience of
+the public (with which a set of such books, extending beyond
+twenty large volumes, would be quite incompatible), but is also
+resolved upon for the purpose of effecting some desirable
+improvements in respect of type, paper, and size of page, which
+could not otherwise be made.&nbsp; To the Literature of the New
+Series it would not become me to refer, beyond glancing at the
+pages of this Journal, and of its predecessor, through a score of
+years; inasmuch as my regular fellow-labourers and I will be at
+our old posts, in company with those younger comrades, whom I
+have had the pleasure of enrolling from time to time, and whose
+number it is always one of my pleasantest editorial duties to
+enlarge.</p>
+<p>As it is better that every kind of work honestly undertaken
+and discharged, should speak for itself than be spoken for, I
+will only remark further on one intended omission in the New
+Series.&nbsp; The Extra Christmas Number has now been so
+extensively, and regularly, and often imitated, that it is in
+very great danger of becoming tiresome.&nbsp; I have therefore
+resolved (though I cannot add, willingly) to abolish it, at the
+highest tide of its success.</p>
+<p style="text-align: right">CHARLES DICKENS.</p>
+<h2>FOOTNOTE</h2>
+<p><a name="footnote519"></a><a href="#citation519"
+class="footnote">[519]</a>&nbsp; <i>Walter Savage Landor</i>: a
+Biography, by John Forster, 2 vols.&nbsp; Chapman and Hall.</p>
+<p>***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONTRIBUTIONS TO ALL THE YEAR
+ROUND***</p>
+<pre>
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+*END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END*
+
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+This etext was prepared from the 1912 Gresham Publishing Company
+edition by David Price, email ccx074@coventry.ac.uk
+
+
+
+
+
+Contributions to All The Year Round by Charles Dickens
+
+
+
+
+Contents:
+
+
+Announcement in "Household Words"
+The Poor Man and his Beer
+Five New Points of Criminal Law
+Leigh Hunt: A Remonstrance
+The Tattlesnivel Bleater
+The Young Man from the Country
+An Enlightened Clergyman
+Rather a Strong Dose
+The Martyr Medium
+The Late Mr. Stanfield
+A Slight Question of Fact
+Landor's Life
+Address which appeared shortly previous to the completion of the
+20th volume
+
+
+
+ANNOUNCEMENT IN "HOUSEHOLD WORDS" OF THE APPROACHING PUBLICATION OF
+"ALL THE YEAR ROUND"
+
+
+
+After the appearance of the present concluding Number of Household
+Words, this publication will merge into the new weekly publication,
+All the Year Round, and the title, Household Words, will form a part
+of the title-page of All the Year Round.
+
+The Prospectus of the latter Journal describes it in these words:
+
+
+"ADDRESS
+
+
+"Nine years of Household Words, are the best practical assurance
+that can be offered to the public, of the spirit and objects of All
+the Year Round.
+
+"In transferring myself, and my strongest energies, from the
+publication that is about to be discontinued, to the publication
+that is about to be begun, I have the happiness of taking with me
+the staff of writers with whom I have laboured, and all the literary
+and business co-operation that can make my work a pleasure. In some
+important respects, I am now free greatly to advance on past
+arrangements. Those, I leave to testify for themselves in due
+course.
+
+"That fusion of the graces of the imagination with the realities of
+life, which is vital to the welfare of any community, and for which
+I have striven from week to week as honestly as I could during the
+last nine years, will continue to be striven for "all the year
+round". The old weekly cares and duties become things of the Past,
+merely to be assumed, with an increased love for them and brighter
+hopes springing out of them, in the Present and the Future.
+
+"I look, and plan, for a very much wider circle of readers, and yet
+again for a steadily expanding circle of readers, in the projects I
+hope to carry through "all the year round". And I feel confident
+that this expectation will be realized, if it deserve realization.
+
+"The task of my new journal is set, and it will steadily try to work
+the task out. Its pages shall show to what good purpose their motto
+is remembered in them, and with how much of fidelity and earnestness
+they tell
+
+"the story of our lives from year to year.
+
+"CHARLES DICKENS."
+
+
+Since this was issued, the Journal itself has come into existence,
+and has spoken for itself five weeks. Its fifth Number is published
+to-day, and its circulation, moderately stated, trebles that now
+relinquished in Household Words.
+
+In referring our readers, henceforth, to All the Year Round, we can
+but assure them afresh, of our unwearying and faithful service, in
+what is at once the work and the chief pleasure of our life.
+Through all that we are doing, and through all that we design to do,
+our aim is to do our best in sincerity of purpose, and true devotion
+of spirit.
+
+We do not for a moment suppose that we may lean on the character of
+these pages, and rest contented at the point where they stop. We
+see in that point but a starting-place for our new journey; and on
+that journey, with new prospects opening out before us everywhere,
+we joyfully proceed, entreating our readers--without any of the pain
+of leave-taking incidental to most journeys--to bear us company All
+the year round.
+
+Saturday, May 28, 1859.
+
+
+
+THE POOR MAN AND HIS BEER
+
+
+
+My friend Philosewers and I, contemplating a farm-labourer the other
+day, who was drinking his mug of beer on a settle at a roadside ale-
+house door, we fell to humming the fag-end of an old ditty, of which
+the poor man and his beer, and the sin of parting them, form the
+doleful burden. Philosewers then mentioned to me that a friend of
+his in an agricultural county--say a Hertfordshire friend--had, for
+two years last past, endeavoured to reconcile the poor man and his
+beer to public morality, by making it a point of honour between
+himself and the poor man that the latter should use his beer and not
+abuse it. Interested in an effort of so unobtrusive and
+unspeechifying a nature, "O Philosewers," said I, after the manner
+of the dreary sages in Eastern apologues, "Show me, I pray, the man
+who deems that temperance can be attained without a medal, an
+oration, a banner, and a denunciation of half the world, and who has
+at once the head and heart to set about it!"
+
+Philosewers expressing, in reply, his willingness to gratify the
+dreary sage, an appointment was made for the purpose. And on the
+day fixed, I, the Dreary one, accompanied by Philosewers, went down
+Nor'-West per railway, in search of temperate temperance. It was a
+thunderous day; and the clouds were so immoderately watery, and so
+very much disposed to sour all the beer in Hertfordshire, that they
+seemed to have taken the pledge.
+
+But, the sun burst forth gaily in the afternoon, and gilded the old
+gables, and old mullioned windows, and old weathercock and old
+clock-face, of the quaint old house which is the dwelling of the man
+we sought. How shall I describe him? As one of the most famous
+practical chemists of the age? That designation will do as well as
+another--better, perhaps, than most others. And his name? Friar
+Bacon.
+
+"Though, take notice, Philosewers," said I, behind my hand, "that
+the first Friar Bacon had not that handsome lady-wife beside him.
+Wherein, O Philosewers, he was a chemist, wretched and forlorn,
+compared with his successor. Young Romeo bade the holy father
+Lawrence hang up philosophy, unless philosophy could make a Juliet.
+Chemistry would infallibly be hanged if its life were staked on
+making anything half so pleasant as this Juliet." The gentle
+Philosewers smiled assent.
+
+The foregoing whisper from myself, the Dreary one, tickled the ear
+of Philosewers, as we walked on the trim garden terrace before
+dinner, among the early leaves and blossoms; two peacocks,
+apparently in very tight new boots, occasionally crossing the gravel
+at a distance. The sun, shining through the old house-windows, now
+and then flashed out some brilliant piece of colour from bright
+hangings within, or upon the old oak panelling; similarly, Friar
+Bacon, as we paced to and fro, revealed little glimpses of his good
+work.
+
+"It is not much," said he. "It is no wonderful thing. There used
+to be a great deal of drunkenness here, and I wanted to make it
+better if I could. The people are very ignorant, and have been much
+neglected, and I wanted to make THAT better, if I could. My utmost
+object was, to help them to a little self-government and a little
+homely pleasure. I only show the way to better things, and advise
+them. I never act for them; I never interfere; above all, I never
+patronise."
+
+I had said to Philosewers as we came along Nor'-West that patronage
+was one of the curses of England; I appeared to rise in the
+estimation of Philosewers when thus confirmed.
+
+"And so," said Friar Bacon, "I established my Allotment-club, and my
+pig-clubs, and those little Concerts by the ladies of my own family,
+of which we have the last of the season this evening. They are a
+great success, for the people here are amazingly fond of music. But
+there is the early dinner-bell, and I have no need to talk of my
+endeavours when you will soon see them in their working dress".
+
+Dinner done, behold the Friar, Philosewers, and myself the Dreary
+one, walking, at six o'clock, across the fields, to the "Club-
+house."
+
+As we swung open the last field-gate and entered the Allotment-
+grounds, many members were already on their way to the Club, which
+stands in the midst of the allotments. Who could help thinking of
+the wonderful contrast between these club-men and the club-men of
+St. James's Street, or Pall Mall, in London! Look at yonder
+prematurely old man, doubled up with work, and leaning on a rude
+stick more crooked than himself, slowly trudging to the club-house,
+in a shapeless hat like an Italian harlequin's, or an old brown-
+paper bag, leathern leggings, and dull green smock-frock, looking as
+though duck-weed had accumulated on it--the result of its stagnant
+life--or as if it were a vegetable production, originally meant to
+blow into something better, but stopped somehow. Compare him with
+Old Cousin Feenix, ambling along St. James's Street, got up in the
+style of a couple of generations ago, and with a head of hair, a
+complexion, and a set of teeth, profoundly impossible to be believed
+in by the widest stretch of human credulity. Can they both be men
+and brothers? Verily they are. And although Cousin Feenix has
+lived so fast that he will die at Baden-Baden, and although this
+club-man in the frock has lived, ever since he came to man's estate,
+on nine shillings a week, and is sure to die in the Union if he die
+in bed, yet he brought as much into the world as Cousin Feenix, and
+will take as much out--more, for more of him is real.
+
+A pretty, simple building, the club-house, with a rustic colonnade
+outside, under which the members can sit on wet evenings, looking at
+the patches of ground they cultivate for themselves; within, a well-
+ventilated room, large and lofty, cheerful pavement of coloured
+tiles, a bar for serving out the beer, good supply of forms and
+chairs, and a brave big chimney-corner, where the fire burns
+cheerfully. Adjoining this room, another:
+
+"Built for a reading-room," said Friar Bacon; "but not much used--
+yet."
+
+The dreary sage, looking in through the window, perceiving a fixed
+reading-desk within, and inquiring its use:
+
+"I have Service there," said Friar Bacon. "They never went anywhere
+to hear prayers, and of course it would be hopeless to help them to
+be happier and better, if they had no religious feeling at all."
+
+"The whole place is very pretty." Thus the sage.
+
+"I am glad you think so. I built it for the holders of the
+Allotment-grounds, and gave it them: only requiring them to manage
+it by a committee of their own appointing, and never to get drunk
+there. They never have got drunk there."
+
+"Yet they have their beer freely?"
+
+"O yes. As much as they choose to buy. The club gets its beer
+direct from the brewer, by the barrel. So they get it good; at once
+much cheaper, and much better, than at the public-house. The
+members take it in turns to be steward, and serve out the beer: if
+a man should decline to serve when his turn came, he would pay a
+fine of twopence. The steward lasts, as long as the barrel lasts.
+When there is a new barrel, there is a new steward."
+
+"What a noble fire is roaring up that chimney!"
+
+"Yes, a capital fire. Every member pays a halfpenny a week."
+
+"Every member must be the holder of an Allotment-garden?"
+
+"Yes; for which he pays five shillings a year. The Allotments you
+see about us, occupy some sixteen or eighteen acres, and each garden
+is as large as experience shows one man to be able to manage. You
+see how admirably they are tilled, and how much they get off them.
+They are always working in them in their spare hours; and when a man
+wants a mug of beer, instead of going off to the village and the
+public-house, he puts down his spade or his hoe, comes to the club-
+house and gets it, and goes back to his work. When he has done
+work, he likes to have his beer at the club, still, and to sit and
+look at his little crops as they thrive."
+
+"They seem to manage the club very well."
+
+"Perfectly well. Here are their own rules. They made them. I
+never interfere with them, except to advise them when they ask me."
+
+
+RULES AND REGULATIONS
+MADE BY THE COMMITTEE
+From the 21st September, 1857
+
+One half-penny per week to be paid to the club by each member
+
+1.--Each member to draw the beer in order, according to the number
+of his allotment; on failing, a forfeit of twopence to be paid to
+the club.
+
+2.--The member that draws the beer to pay for the same, and bring
+his ticket up receipted when the subscriptions are paid; on failing
+to do so, a penalty of sixpence to be forfeited and paid to the
+club.
+
+3.--The subscriptions and forfeits to be paid at the club-room on
+the last Saturday night of each month.
+
+4.--The subscriptions and forfeits to be cleared up every quarter;
+if not, a penalty of sixpence to be paid to the club.
+
+5.--The member that draws the beer to be at the club-room by six
+o'clock every evening, and stay till ten; but in the event of no
+member being there, he may leave at nine; on failing so to attend, a
+penalty of sixpence to be paid to the club.
+
+6.--Any member giving beer to a stranger in this club-room,
+excepting to his wife or family, shall be liable to the penalty of
+one shilling.
+
+7.--Any member lifting his hand to strike another in this club-room
+shall be liable to the penalty of sixpence.
+
+8.--Any member swearing in this club-room shall be liable to a
+penalty of twopence each time.
+
+9.--Any member selling beer shall be expelled from the club.
+
+10.--Any member wishing to give up his allotment, may apply to the
+committee, and they shall value the crop and the condition of the
+ground. The amount of the valuation shall be paid by the succeeding
+tenant, who shall be allowed to enter on any part of the allotment
+which is uncropped at the time of notice of the leaving tenant.
+
+11.--Any member not keeping his allotment-garden clear from seed-
+weeds, or otherwise injuring his neighbours, may be turned out of
+his garden by the votes of two-thirds of the committee, one month's
+notice being given to him.
+
+12.--Any member carelessly breaking a mug, is to pay the cost of
+replacing the same.
+
+
+I was soliciting the attention of Philosewers to some old old
+bonnets hanging in the Allotment-gardens to frighten the birds, and
+the fashion of which I should think would terrify a French bird to
+death at any distance, when Philosewers solicited my attention to
+the scrapers at the club-house door. The amount of the soil of
+England which every member brought there on his feet, was indeed
+surprising; and even I, who am professedly a salad-eater, could have
+grown a salad for my dinner, in the earth on any member's frock or
+hat.
+
+"Now," said Friar Bacon, looking at his watch, "for the Pig-clubs!"
+
+The dreary Sage entreated explanation.
+
+"Why, a pig is so very valuable to a poor labouring man, and it is
+so very difficult for him at this time of the year to get money
+enough to buy one, that I lend him a pound for the purpose. But, I
+do it in this way. I leave such of the club members as choose it
+and desire it, to form themselves into parties of five. To every
+man in each company of five, I lend a pound, to buy a pig. But,
+each man of the five becomes bound for every other man, as to the
+repayment of his money. Consequently, they look after one another,
+and pick out their partners with care; selecting men in whom they
+have confidence."
+
+"They repay the money, I suppose, when the pig is fattened, killed,
+and sold?"
+
+"Yes. Then they repay the money. And they do repay it. I had one
+man, last year, who was a little tardy (he was in the habit of going
+to the public-house); but even he did pay. It is an immense
+Advantage to one of these poor fellows to have a pig. The pig
+consumes the refuse from the man's cottage and allotment-garden, and
+the pig's refuse enriches the man's garden besides. The pig is the
+poor man's friend. Come into the club-house again."
+
+The poor man's friend. Yes. I have often wondered who really was
+the poor man's friend among a great number of competitors, and I now
+clearly perceive him to be the pig. HE never makes any flourishes
+about the poor man. HE never gammons the poor man--except to his
+manifest advantage in the article of bacon. HE never comes down to
+this house, or goes down to his constituents. He openly declares to
+the poor man, "I want my sty because I am a Pig. I desire to have
+as much to eat as you can by any means stuff me with, because I am a
+Pig." HE never gives the poor man a sovereign for bringing up a
+family. HE never grunts the poor man's name in vain. And when he
+dies in the odour of Porkity, he cuts up, a highly useful creature
+and a blessing to the poor man, from the ring in his snout to the
+curl in his tail. Which of the poor man's other friends can say as
+much? Where is the M.P. who means Mere Pork?
+
+The dreary Sage had glided into these reflections, when he found
+himself sitting by the club-house fire, surrounded by green smock-
+frocks and shapeless hats: with Friar Bacon lively, busy, and
+expert, at a little table near him.
+
+"Now, then, come. The first five!" said Friar Bacon. "Where are
+you?"
+
+"Order!" cried a merry-faced little man, who had brought his young
+daughter with him to see life, and who always modestly hid his face
+in his beer-mug after he had thus assisted the business.
+
+"John Nightingale, William Thrush, Joseph Blackbird, Cecil Robin,
+and Thomas Linnet!" cried Friar Bacon.
+
+"Here, sir!" and "Here, sir!" And Linnet, Robin, Blackbird, Thrush,
+and Nightingale, stood confessed.
+
+We, the undersigned, declare, in effect, by this written paper, that
+each of us is responsible for the repayment of this pig-money by
+each of the other. "Sure you understand, Nightingale?"
+
+"Ees, sur."
+
+"Can you write your name, Nightingale?"
+
+"Na, sur."
+
+Nightingale's eye upon his name, as Friar Bacon wrote it, was a
+sight to consider in after years. Rather incredulous was
+Nightingale, with a hand at the corner of his mouth, and his head on
+one side, as to those drawings really meaning him. Doubtful was
+Nightingale whether any virtue had gone out of him in that committal
+to paper. Meditative was Nightingale as to what would come of young
+Nightingale's growing up to the acquisition of that art. Suspended
+was the interest of Nightingale, when his name was done--as if he
+thought the letters were only sown, to come up presently in some
+other form. Prodigious, and wrong-handed was the cross made by
+Nightingale on much encouragement--the strokes directed from him
+instead of towards him; and most patient and sweet-humoured was the
+smile of Nightingale as he stepped back into a general laugh.
+
+"Order!" cried the little man. Immediately disappearing into his
+mug.
+
+"Ralph Mangel, Roger Wurzel, Edward Vetches, Matthew Carrot, and
+Charles Taters!" said Friar Bacon.
+
+"All here, sir."
+
+"You understand it, Mangel?"
+
+"Iss, sir, I unnerstaans it."
+
+"Can you write your name, Mangel?"
+
+"Iss, sir."
+
+Breathless interest. A dense background of smock-frocks accumulated
+behind Mangel, and many eyes in it looked doubtfully at Friar Bacon,
+as who should say, "Can he really though?" Mangel put down his hat,
+retired a little to get a good look at the paper, wetted his right
+hand thoroughly by drawing it slowly across his mouth, approached
+the paper with great determination, flattened it, sat down at it,
+and got well to his work. Circuitous and sea-serpent-like, were the
+movements of the tongue of Mangel while he formed the letters;
+elevated were the eyebrows of Mangel and sidelong the eyes, as, with
+his left whisker reposing on his left arm, they followed his
+performance; many were the misgivings of Mangel, and slow was his
+retrospective meditation touching the junction of the letter p with
+h; something too active was the big forefinger of Mangel in its
+propensity to rub out without proved cause. At last, long and deep
+was the breath drawn by Mangel when he laid down the pen; long and
+deep the wondering breath drawn by the background--as if they had
+watched his walking across the rapids of Niagara, on stilts, and now
+cried, "He has done it!"
+
+But, Mangel was an honest man, if ever honest man lived. "T'owt to
+be a hell, sir," said he, contemplating his work, "and I ha' made a
+t on 't."
+
+The over-fraught bosoms of the background found relief in a roar of
+laughter.
+
+"OR-DER!" cried the little man. "CHEER!" And after that second
+word, came forth from his mug no more.
+
+Several other clubs signed, and received their money. Very few
+could write their names; all who could not, pleaded that they could
+not, more or less sorrowfully, and always with a shake of the head,
+and in a lower voice than their natural speaking voice. Crosses
+could be made standing; signatures must be sat down to. There was
+no exception to this rule. Meantime, the various club-members
+smoked, drank their beer, and talked together quite unrestrained.
+They all wore their hats, except when they went up to Friar Bacon's
+table. The merry-faced little man offered his beer, with a natural
+good-fellowship, both to the Dreary one and Philosewers. Both
+partook of it with thanks.
+
+"Seven o'clock!" said Friar Bacon. "And now we better get across to
+the concert, men, for the music will be beginning."
+
+The concert was in Friar Bacon's laboratory; a large building near
+at hand, in an open field. The bettermost people of the village and
+neighbourhood were in a gallery on one side, and, in a gallery
+opposite the orchestra. The whole space below was filled with the
+labouring people and their families, to the number of five or six
+hundred. We had been obliged to turn away two hundred to-night,
+Friar Bacon said, for want of room--and that, not counting the boys,
+of whom we had taken in only a few picked ones, by reason of the
+boys, as a class, being given to too fervent a custom of applauding
+with their boot-heels.
+
+The performers were the ladies of Friar Bacon's family, and two
+gentlemen; one of them, who presided, a Doctor of Music. A piano
+was the only instrument. Among the vocal pieces, we had a negro
+melody (rapturously encored), the Indian Drum, and the Village
+Blacksmith; neither did we want for fashionable Italian, having Ah!
+non giunge, and Mi manca la voce. Our success was splendid; our
+good-humoured, unaffected, and modest bearing, a pattern. As to the
+audience, they were far more polite and far more pleased than at the
+Opera; they were faultless. Thus for barely an hour the concert
+lasted, with thousands of great bottles looking on from the walls,
+containing the results of Friar Bacon's Million and one experiments
+in agricultural chemistry; and containing too, no doubt, a variety
+of materials with which the Friar could have blown us all through
+the roof at five minutes' notice.
+
+God save the Queen being done, the good Friar stepped forward and
+said a few words, more particularly concerning two points; firstly,
+that Saturday half-holiday, which it would be kind in farmers to
+grant; secondly, the additional Allotment-grounds we were going to
+establish, in consequence of the happy success of the system, but
+which we could not guarantee should entitle the holders to be
+members of the club, because the present members must consider and
+settle that question for themselves: a bargain between man and man
+being always a bargain, and we having made over the club to them as
+the original Allotment-men. This was loudly applauded, and so, with
+contented and affectionate cheering, it was all over.
+
+As Philosewers, and I the Dreary, posted back to London, looking up
+at the moon and discussing it as a world preparing for the
+habitation of responsible creatures, we expatiated on the honour due
+to men in this world of ours who try to prepare it for a higher
+course, and to leave the race who live and die upon it better than
+they found them.
+
+
+
+FIVE NEW POINTS OF CRIMINAL LAW
+
+
+
+The existing Criminal Law has been found in trials for Murder, to be
+so exceedingly hasty, unfair, and oppressive--in a word, to be so
+very objectionable to the amiable persons accused of that
+thoughtless act--that it is, we understand, the intention of the
+Government to bring in a Bill for its amendment. We have been
+favoured with an outline of its probable provisions.
+
+It will be grounded on the profound principle that the real offender
+is the Murdered Person; but for whose obstinate persistency in being
+murdered, the interesting fellow-creature to be tried could not have
+got into trouble.
+
+Its leading enactments may be expected to resolve themselves under
+the following heads:
+
+1. There shall be no judge. Strong representations have been made
+by highly popular culprits that the presence of this obtrusive
+character is prejudicial to their best interests. The Court will be
+composed of a political gentleman, sitting in a secluded room
+commanding a view of St. James's Park, who has already more to do
+than any human creature can, by any stretch of the human
+imagination, be supposed capable of doing.
+
+2. The jury to consist of Five Thousand Five Hundred and Fifty-five
+Volunteers.
+
+3. The jury to be strictly prohibited from seeing either the
+accused or the witnesses. They are not to be sworn. They are on no
+account to hear the evidence. They are to receive it, or such
+representations of it, as may happen to fall in their way; and they
+will constantly write letters about it to all the Papers.
+
+4. Supposing the trial to be a trial for Murder by poisoning, and
+supposing the hypothetical case, or the evidence, for the
+prosecution to charge the administration of two poisons, say Arsenic
+and Antimony; and supposing the taint of Arsenic in the body to be
+possible but not probable, and the presence of Antimony in the body,
+to be an absolute certainty; it will then become the duty of the
+jury to confine their attention solely to the Arsenic, and entirely
+to dismiss the Antimony from their minds.
+
+5. The symptoms preceding the death of the real offender (or
+Murdered Person) being described in evidence by medical
+practitioners who saw them, other medical practitioners who never
+saw them shall be required to state whether they are inconsistent
+with certain known diseases--but, THEY SHALL NEVER BE ASKED WHETHER
+THEY ARE NOT EXACTLY CONSISTENT WITH THE ADMINISTRATION OF POISON.
+To illustrate this enactment in the proposed Bill by a case:- A
+raging mad dog is seen to run into the house where Z lives alone,
+foaming at the mouth. Z and the mad dog are for some time left
+together in that house under proved circumstances, irresistibly
+leading to the conclusion that Z has been bitten by the dog. Z is
+afterwards found lying on his bed in a state of hydrophobia, and
+with the marks of the dog's teeth. Now, the symptoms of that
+disease being identical with those of another disease called
+Tetanus, which might supervene on Z's running a rusty nail into a
+certain part of his foot, medical practitioners who never saw Z,
+shall bear testimony to that abstract fact, and it shall then be
+incumbent on the Registrar-General to certify that Z died of a rusty
+nail.
+
+It is hoped that these alterations in the present mode of procedure
+will not only be quite satisfactory to the accused person (which is
+the first great consideration), but will also tend, in a tolerable
+degree, to the welfare and safety of society. For it is not sought
+in this moderate and prudent measure to be wholly denied that it is
+an inconvenience to Society to be poisoned overmuch.
+
+
+
+LEIGH HUNT: A REMONSTRANCE
+
+
+
+"The sense of beauty and gentleness, of moral beauty and faithful
+gentleness, grew upon him as the clear evening closed in. When he
+went to visit his relative at Putney, he still carried with him his
+work, and the books he more immediately wanted. Although his bodily
+powers had been giving way, his most conspicuous qualities, his
+memory for books, and his affection remained; and when his hair was
+white, when his ample chest had grown slender, when the very
+proportion of his height had visibly lessened, his step was still
+ready, and his dark eyes brightened at every happy expression, and
+at every thought of kindness. His death was simply exhaustion; he
+broke off his work to lie down and repose. So gentle was the final
+approach, that he scarcely recognised it till the very last, and
+then it came without terrors. His physical suffering had not been
+severe; at the latest hour he said that his only uneasiness was
+failing breath. And that failing breath was used to express his
+sense of the inexhaustible kindness he had received from the family
+who had been so unexpectedly made his nurses,--to draw from one of
+his sons, by minute, eager, and searching questions, all that he
+could learn about the latest vicissitudes and growing hopes of
+Italy,--to ask the friends and children around him for news of those
+whom he loved,--and to send love and messages to the absent who
+loved him."
+
+
+Thus, with a manly simplicity and filial affection, writes the
+eldest son of Leigh Hunt in recording his father's death. These are
+the closing words of a new edition of The Autobiography of Leigh
+Hunt, published by Messrs. Smith and Elder, of Cornhill, revised by
+that son, and enriched with an introductory chapter of remarkable
+beauty and tenderness. The son's first presentation of his father
+to the reader, "rather tall, straight as an arrow, looking slenderer
+than he really was; his hair black and shining, and slightly
+inclined to wave; his head high, his forehead straight and white,
+his eyes black and sparkling, his general complexion dark; in his
+whole carriage and manner an extraordinary degree of life,"
+completes the picture. It is the picture of the flourishing and
+fading away of man that is born of a woman and hath but a short time
+to live.
+
+In his presentation of his father's moral nature and intellectual
+qualities, Mr Hunt is no less faithful and no less touching. Those
+who knew Leigh Hunt, will see the bright face and hear the musical
+voice again, when he is recalled to them in this passage: "Even at
+seasons of the greatest depression in his fortunes, he always
+attracted many visitors, but still not so much for any repute that
+attended him as for his personal qualities. Few men were more
+attractive, in society, whether in a large company or over the
+fireside. His manners were peculiarly animated; his conversation,
+varied, ranging over a great field of subjects, was moved and called
+forth by the response of his companion, be that companion
+philosopher or student, sage or boy, man or woman; and he was
+equally ready for the most lively topics or for the gravest
+reflections--his expression easily adapting itself to the tone of
+his companion's mind. With much freedom of manners, he combined a
+spontaneous courtesy that never failed, and a considerateness
+derived from a ceaseless kindness of heart that invariably
+fascinated even strangers." Or in this: "His animation, his
+sympathy with what was gay and pleasurable; his avowed doctrine of
+cultivating cheerfulness, were manifest on the surface, and could be
+appreciated by those who knew him in society, most probably even
+exaggerated as salient traits, on which he himself insisted WITH A
+SORT OF GAY AND OSTENTATIOUS WILFULNESS."
+
+The last words describe one of the most captivating peculiarities of
+a most original and engaging man, better than any other words could.
+The reader is besought to observe them, for a reason that shall
+presently be given. Lastly: "The anxiety to recognise the right of
+others, the tendency to 'refine', which was noted by an early school
+companion, and the propensity to elaborate every thought, made him,
+along with the direct argument by which he sustained his own
+conviction, recognise and almost admit all that might be said on the
+opposite side". For these reasons, and for others suggested with
+equal felicity, and with equal fidelity, the son writes of the
+father, "It is most desirable that his qualities should be known as
+they were; for such deficiencies as he had are the honest
+explanation of his mistakes; while, as the reader may see from his
+writings and his conduct, they are not, as the faults of which he
+was accused would be, incompatible with the noblest faculties both
+of head and heart. To know Leigh Hunt as he was, was to hold him in
+reverence and love."
+
+These quotations are made here, with a special object. It is not,
+that the personal testimony of one who knew Leigh Hunt well, may be
+borne to their truthfulness. It is not, that it may be recorded in
+these pages, as in his son's introductory chapter, that his life was
+of the most amiable and domestic kind, that his wants were few, that
+his way of life was frugal, that he was a man of small expenses, no
+ostentations, a diligent labourer, and a secluded man of letters.
+It is not, that the inconsiderate and forgetful may be reminded of
+his wrongs and sufferings in the days of the Regency, and of the
+national disgrace of his imprisonment. It is not, that their
+forbearance may be entreated for his grave, in right of his graceful
+fancy or his political labours and endurances, though -
+
+
+Not only we, the latest seed of Time,
+New men, that in the flying of a wheel
+Cry down the past, not only we, that prate
+Of rights and wrongs, have loved the people well.
+
+
+It is, that a duty may be done in the most direct way possible. An
+act of plain, clear duty.
+
+Four or five years ago, the writer of these lines was much pained by
+accidentally encountering a printed statement, "that Mr. Leigh Hunt
+was the original of Harold Skimpole in Bleak House". The writer of
+these lines, is the author of that book. The statement came from
+America. It is no disrespect to that country, in which the writer
+has, perhaps, as many friends and as true an interest as any man
+that lives, good-humouredly to state the fact, that he has, now and
+then, been the subject of paragraphs in Transatlantic newspapers,
+more surprisingly destitute of all foundation in truth than the
+wildest delusions of the wildest lunatics. For reasons born of this
+experience, he let the thing go by.
+
+But, since Mr. Leigh Hunt's death, the statement has been revived in
+England. The delicacy and generosity evinced in its revival, are
+for the rather late consideration of its revivers. The fact is
+this:
+
+Exactly those graces and charms of manner which are remembered in
+the words we have quoted, were remembered by the author of the work
+of fiction in question, when he drew the character in question.
+Above all other things, that "sort of gay and ostentatious
+wilfulness" in the humouring of a subject, which had many a time
+delighted him, and impressed him as being unspeakably whimsical and
+attractive, was the airy quality he wanted for the man he invented.
+Partly for this reason, and partly (he has since often grieved to
+think) for the pleasure it afforded him to find that delightful
+manner reproducing itself under his hand, he yielded to the
+temptation of too often making the character SPEAK like his old
+friend. He no more thought, God forgive him! that the admired
+original would ever be charged with the imaginary vices of the
+fictitious creature, than he has himself ever thought of charging
+the blood of Desdemona and Othello, on the innocent Academy model
+who sat for Iago's leg in the picture. Even as to the mere
+occasional manner, he meant to be so cautious and conscientious,
+that he privately referred the proof sheets of the first number of
+that book to two intimate literary friends of Leigh Hunt (both still
+living), and altered the whole of that part of the text on their
+discovering too strong a resemblance to his "way".
+
+He cannot see the son lay this wreath on the father's tomb, and
+leave him to the possibility of ever thinking that the present words
+might have righted the father's memory and were left unwritten. He
+cannot know that his own son may have to explain his father when
+folly or malice can wound his heart no more, and leave this task
+undone.
+
+
+
+THE TATTLESNIVEL BLEATER
+
+
+
+The pen is taken in hand on the present occasion, by a private
+individual (not wholly unaccustomed to literary composition), for
+the exposure of a conspiracy of a most frightful nature; a
+conspiracy which, like the deadly Upas-tree of Java, on which the
+individual produced a poem in his earlier youth (not wholly devoid
+of length), which was so flatteringly received (in circles not
+wholly unaccustomed to form critical opinions), that he was
+recommended to publish it, and would certainly have carried out the
+suggestion, but for private considerations (not wholly unconnected
+with expense).
+
+The individual who undertakes the exposure of the gigantic
+conspiracy now to be laid bare in all its hideous deformity, is an
+inhabitant of the town of Tattlesnivel--a lowly inhabitant, it may
+be, but one who, as an Englishman and a man, will ne'er abase his
+eye before the gaudy and the mocking throng.
+
+Tattlesnivel stoops to demand no championship from her sons. On an
+occasion in History, our bluff British monarch, our Eighth Royal
+Harry, almost went there. And long ere the periodical in which this
+exposure will appear, had sprung into being, Tattlesnivel had
+unfurled that standard which yet waves upon her battlements. The
+standard alluded to, is THE TATTLESNIVEL BLEATER, containing the
+latest intelligence, and state of markets, down to the hour of going
+to press, and presenting a favourable local medium for advertisers,
+on a graduated scale of charges, considerably diminishing in
+proportion to the guaranteed number of insertions.
+
+It were bootless to expatiate on the host of talent engaged in
+formidable phalanx to do fealty to the Bleater. Suffice it to
+select, for present purposes, one of the most gifted and (but for
+the wide and deep ramifications of an un-English conspiracy) most
+rising, of the men who are bold Albion's pride. It were needless,
+after this preamble, to point the finger more directly at the LONDON
+CORRESPONDENT OF THE TATTLESNIVEL BLEATER.
+
+On the weekly letters of that Correspondent, on the flexibility of
+their English, on the boldness of their grammar, on the originality
+of their quotations (never to be found as they are printed, in any
+book existing), on the priority of their information, on their
+intimate acquaintance with the secret thoughts and unexecuted
+intentions of men, it would ill become the humble Tattlesnivellian
+who traces these words, to dwell. They are graven in the memory;
+they are on the Bleater's file. Let them be referred to.
+
+But from the infamous, the dark, the subtle conspiracy which spreads
+its baleful roots throughout the land, and of which the Bleater's
+London Correspondent is the one sole subject, it is the purpose of
+the lowly Tattlesnivellian who undertakes this revelation, to tear
+the veil. Nor will he shrink from his self-imposed labour,
+Herculean though it be.
+
+The conspiracy begins in the very Palace of the Sovereign Lady of
+our Ocean Isle. Leal and loyal as it is the proud vaunt of the
+Bleater's readers, one and all, to be, the inhabitant who pens this
+exposure does not personally impeach, either her Majesty the queen,
+or the illustrious Prince Consort. But, some silken-clad smoothers,
+some purple parasites, some fawners in frippery, some greedy and
+begartered ones in gorgeous garments, he does impeach--ay, and
+wrathfully! Is it asked on what grounds? They shall be stated.
+
+The Bleater's London Correspondent, in the prosecution of his
+important inquiries, goes down to Windsor, sends in his card, has a
+confidential interview with her Majesty and the illustrious Prince
+Consort. For a time, the restraints of Royalty are thrown aside in
+the cheerful conversation of the Bleater's London Correspondent, in
+his fund of information, in his flow of anecdote, in the atmosphere
+of his genius; her Majesty brightens, the illustrious Prince Consort
+thaws, the cares of State and the conflicts of Party are forgotten,
+lunch is proposed. Over that unassuming and domestic table, her
+Majesty communicates to the Bleater's London Correspondent that it
+is her intention to send his Royal Highness the Prince of Wales to
+inspect the top of the Great Pyramid--thinking it likely to improve
+his acquaintance with the views of the people. Her Majesty further
+communicates that she has made up her royal mind (and that the
+Prince Consort has made up his illustrious mind) to the bestowal of
+the vacant Garter, let us say on Mr. Roebuck. The younger Royal
+children having been introduced at the request of the Bleater's
+London Correspondent, and having been by him closely observed to
+present the usual external indications of good health, the happy
+knot is severed, with a sigh the Royal bow is once more strung to
+its full tension, the Bleater's London Correspondent returns to
+London, writes his letter, and tells the Tattlesnivel Bleater what
+he knows. All Tattlesnivel reads it, and knows that he knows it.
+But, DOES his Royal Highness the Prince of Wales ultimately go to
+the top of the Great Pyramid? DOES Mr. Roebuck ultimately get the
+Garter? No. Are the younger Royal children even ultimately found
+to be well? On the contrary, they have--and on that very day had--
+the measles. Why is this? BECAUSE THE CONSPIRATORS AGAINST THE
+BLEATER'S LONDON CORRESPONDENT HAVE STEPPED IN WITH THEIR DARK
+MACHINATIONS. Because her Majesty and the Prince Consort are
+artfully induced to change their minds, from north to south, from
+east to west, immediately after it is known to the conspirators that
+they have put themselves in communication with the Bleater's London
+Correspondent. It is now indignantly demanded, by whom are they so
+tampered with? It is now indignantly demanded, who took the
+responsibility of concealing the indisposition of those Royal
+children from their Royal and illustrious parents, and of bringing
+them down from their beds, disguised, expressly to confound the
+London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater? Who are those
+persons, it is again asked? Let not rank and favour protect them.
+Let the traitors be exhibited in the face of day!
+
+Lord John Russell is in this conspiracy. Tell us not that his
+Lordship is a man of too much spirit and honour. Denunciation is
+hurled against him. The proof? The proof is here.
+
+The Time is panting for an answer to the question, Will Lord John
+Russell consent to take office under Lord Palmerston? Good. The
+London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater is in the act of
+writing his weekly letter, finds himself rather at a loss to settle
+this question finally, leaves off, puts his hat on, goes down to the
+lobby of the House of Commons, sends in for Lord John Russell, and
+has him out. He draws his arm through his Lordship's, takes him
+aside, and says, "John, will you ever accept office under
+Palmerston?" His Lordship replies, "I will not." The Bleater's
+London Correspondent retorts, with the caution such a man is bound
+to use, "John, think again; say nothing to me rashly; is there any
+temper here?" His Lordship replies, calmly, "None whatever." After
+giving him time for reflection, the Bleater's London Correspondent
+says, "Once more, John, let me put a question to you. Will you ever
+accept office under Palmerston?" His Lordship answers (note the
+exact expressions), "Nothing shall induce me, ever to accept a seat
+in a Cabinet of which Palmerston is the Chief." They part, the
+London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater finishes his
+letter, and--always being withheld by motives of delicacy, from
+plainly divulging his means of getting accurate information on every
+subject, at first hand--puts in it, this passage: "Lord John
+Russell is spoken of, by blunderers, for Foreign Affairs; but I have
+the best reasons for assuring your readers, that" (giving prominence
+to the exact expressions, it will be observed) "'NOTHING WILL EVER
+INDUCE HIM, TO ACCEPT A SEAT IN A CABINET OF WHICH PALMERSTON IS THE
+CHIEF.' On this you may implicitly rely." What happens? On the
+very day of the publication of that number of the Bleater--the
+malignity of the conspirators being even manifested in the selection
+of the day--Lord John Russell takes the Foreign Office! Comment
+were superfluous.
+
+The people of Tattlesnivel will be told, have been told, that Lord
+John Russell is a man of his word. He may be, on some occasions;
+but, when overshadowed by this dark and enormous growth of
+conspiracy, Tattlesnivel knows him to be otherwise. "I happen to be
+certain, deriving my information from a source which cannot be
+doubted to be authentic," wrote the London Correspondent of the
+Bleater, within the last year, "that Lord John Russell bitterly
+regrets having made that explicit speech of last Monday." These are
+not roundabout phrases; these are plain words. What does Lord John
+Russell (apparently by accident), within eight-and-forty hours after
+their diffusion over the civilised globe? Rises in his place in
+Parliament, and unblushingly declares that if the occasion could
+arise five hundred times, for his making that very speech, he would
+make it five hundred times! Is there no conspiracy here? And is
+this combination against one who would be always right if he were
+not proved always wrong, to be endured in a country that boasts of
+its freedom and its fairness?
+
+But, the Tattlesnivellian who now raises his voice against
+intolerable oppression, may be told that, after all, this is a
+political conspiracy. He may be told, forsooth, that Mr. Disraeli's
+being in it, that Lord Derby's being in it, that Mr. Bright's being
+in it, that every Home, Foreign, and Colonial Secretary's being in
+it, that every ministry's and every opposition's being in it, are
+but proofs that men will do in politics what they would do in
+nothing else. Is this the plea? If so, the rejoinder is, that the
+mighty conspiracy includes the whole circle of Artists of all kinds,
+and comprehends all degrees of men, down to the worst criminal and
+the hangman who ends his career. For, all these are intimately
+known to the London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater, and
+all these deceive him.
+
+Sir, put it to the proof. There is the Bleater on the file--
+documentary evidence. Weeks, months, before the Exhibition of the
+Royal Academy, the Bleater's London Correspondent knows the subjects
+of all the leading pictures, knows what the painters first meant to
+do, knows what they afterwards substituted for what they first meant
+to do, knows what they ought to do and won't do, knows what they
+ought not to do and will do, knows to a letter from whom they have
+commissions, knows to a shilling how much they are to be paid. Now,
+no sooner is each studio clear of the remarkable man to whom each
+studio-occupant has revealed himself as he does not reveal himself
+to his nearest and dearest bosom friend, than conspiracy and fraud
+begin. Alfred the Great becomes the Fairy Queen; Moses viewing the
+Promised Land, turns out to be Moses going to the Fair; Portrait of
+His Grace the Archbishop of Canterbury, is transformed, as if by
+irreverent enchantment of the dissenting interest, into A Favourite
+Terrier, or Cattle Grazing; and the most extraordinary work of art
+in the list described by the Bleater, is coolly sponged out
+altogether, and asserted never to have had existence at all, even in
+the most shadow thoughts of its executant! This is vile enough, but
+this is not all. Picture-buyers then come forth from their secret
+positions, and creep into their places in the assassin-multitude of
+conspirators. Mr. Baring, after expressly telling the Bleater's
+London Correspondent that he had bought No. 39 for one thousand
+guineas, gives it up to somebody unknown for a couple of hundred
+pounds; the Marquis of Lansdowne pretends to have no knowledge
+whatever of the commissions to which the London Correspondent of the
+Bleater swore him, but allows a Railway Contractor to cut him out
+for half the money. Similar examples might be multiplied. Shame,
+shame, on these men! Is this England?
+
+Sir, look again at Literature. The Bleater's London Correspondent
+is not merely acquainted with all the eminent writers, but is in
+possession of the secrets of their souls. He is versed in their
+hidden meanings and references, sees their manuscripts before
+publication, and knows the subjects and titles of their books when
+they are not begun. How dare those writers turn upon the eminent
+man and depart from every intention they have confided to him? How
+do they justify themselves in entirely altering their manuscripts,
+changing their titles, and abandoning their subjects? Will they
+deny, in the face of Tattlesnivel, that they do so? If they have
+such hardihood, let the file of the Bleater strike them dumb. By
+their fruits they shall be known. Let their works be compared with
+the anticipatory letters of the Bleater's London Correspondent, and
+their falsehood and deceit will become manifest as the sun; it will
+be seen that they do nothing which they stand pledged to the
+Bleater's London Correspondent to do; it will be seen that they are
+among the blackest parties in this black and base conspiracy. This
+will become apparent, sir, not only as to their public proceedings
+but as to their private affairs. The outraged Tattlesnivellian who
+now drags this infamous combination into the face of day, charges
+those literary persons with making away with their property,
+imposing on the Income Tax Commissioners, keeping false books, and
+entering into sham contracts. He accuses them on the unimpeachable
+faith of the London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater. With
+whose evidence they will find it impossible to reconcile their own
+account of any transaction of their lives.
+
+The national character is degenerating under the influence of the
+ramifications of this tremendous conspiracy. Forgery is committed,
+constantly. A person of note--any sort of person of note--dies.
+The Bleater's London Correspondent knows what his circumstances are,
+what his savings are (if any), who his creditors are, all about his
+children and relations, and (in general, before his body is cold)
+describes his will. Is that will ever proved? Never! Some other
+will is substituted; the real instrument, destroyed. And this (as
+has been before observed), is England.
+
+Who are the workmen and artificers, enrolled upon the books of this
+treacherous league? From what funds are they paid, and with what
+ceremonies are they sworn to secrecy? Are there none such? Observe
+what follows. A little time ago the Bleater's London Correspondent
+had this passage: "Boddleboy is pianoforte playing at St.
+Januarius's Gallery, with pretty tolerable success! He clears three
+hundred pounds per night. Not bad this!!" The builder of St.
+Januarius's Gallery (plunged to the throat in the conspiracy) met
+with this piece of news, and observed, with characteristic
+coarseness, "that the Bleater's London Correspondent was a Blind
+Ass". Being pressed by a man of spirit to give his reasons for this
+extraordinary statement, he declared that the Gallery, crammed to
+suffocation, would not hold two hundred pounds, and that its
+expenses were, probably, at least half what it did hold. The man of
+spirit (himself a Tattlesnivellian) had the Gallery measured within
+a week from that hour, and it would not hold two hundred pounds!
+Now, can the poorest capacity doubt that it had been altered in the
+meantime?
+
+And so the conspiracy extends, through every grade of society, down
+to the condemned criminal in prison, the hangman, and the Ordinary.
+Every famous murderer within the last ten years has desecrated his
+last moments by falsifying his confidences imparted specially to the
+London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater; on every such
+occasion, Mr. Calcraft has followed the degrading example; and the
+reverend Ordinary, forgetful of his cloth, and mindful only (it
+would seem, alas!) of the conspiracy, has committed himself to some
+account or other of the criminal's demeanour and conversation, which
+has been diametrically opposed to the exclusive information of the
+London Correspondent of the Bleater. And this (as has been before
+observed) is Merry England!
+
+A man of true genius, however, is not easily defeated. The
+Bleater's London Correspondent, probably beginning to suspect the
+existence of a plot against him, has recently fallen on a new style,
+which, as being very difficult to countermine, may necessitate the
+organisation of a new conspiracy. One of his masterly letters,
+lately, disclosed the adoption of this style--which was remarked
+with profound sensation throughout Tattlesnivel--in the following
+passage: "Mentioning literary small talk, I may tell you that some
+new and extraordinary rumours are afloat concerning the
+conversations I have previously mentioned, alleged to have taken
+place in the first floor front (situated over the street door), of
+Mr. X. Ameter (the poet so well known to your readers), in which, X.
+Ameter's great uncle, his second son, his butcher, and a corpulent
+gentleman with one eye universally respected at Kensington, are said
+not to have been on the most friendly footing; I forbear, however,
+to pursue the subject further, this week, my informant not being
+able to supply me with exact particulars."
+
+But, enough, sir. The inhabitant of Tattlesnivel who has taken pen
+in hand to expose this odious association of unprincipled men
+against a shining (local) character, turns from it with disgust and
+contempt. Let him in few words strip the remaining flimsy covering
+from the nude object of the conspirators, and his loathsome task is
+ended.
+
+Sir, that object, he contends, is evidently twofold. First, to
+exhibit the London Correspondent of the Tattlesnivel Bleater in the
+light of a mischievous Blockhead who, by hiring himself out to tell
+what he cannot possibly know, is as great a public nuisance as a
+Blockhead in a corner can be. Second, to suggest to the men of
+Tattlesnivel that it does not improve their town to have so much Dry
+Rubbish shot there.
+
+Now, sir, on both these points Tattlesnivel demands in accents of
+Thunder, Where is the Attorney General? Why doesn't the Times take
+it up? (Is the latter in the conspiracy? It never adopts his
+views, or quotes him, and incessantly contradicts him.)
+Tattlesnivel, sir, remembering that our forefathers contended with
+the Norman at Hastings, and bled at a variety of other places that
+will readily occur to you, demands that its birthright shall not be
+bartered away for a mess of pottage. Have a care, sir, have a care!
+Or Tattlesnivel (its idle Rifles piled in its scouted streets) may
+be seen ere long, advancing with its Bleater to the foot of the
+Throne, and demanding redress for this conspiracy, from the orbed
+and sceptred hands of Majesty itself!
+
+
+
+THE YOUNG MAN FROM THE COUNTRY
+
+
+
+A song of the hour, now in course of being sung and whistled in
+every street, the other day reminded the writer of these words--as
+he chanced to pass a fag-end of the song for the twentieth time in a
+short London walk--that twenty years ago, a little book on the
+United States, entitled American Notes, was published by "a Young
+Man from the Country", who had just seen and left it.
+
+This Young Man from the Country fell into a deal of trouble, by
+reason of having taken the liberty to believe that he perceived in
+America downward popular tendencies for which his young enthusiasm
+had been anything but prepared. It was in vain for the Young Man to
+offer in extenuation of his belief that no stranger could have set
+foot on those shores with a feeling of livelier interest in the
+country, and stronger faith in it, than he. Those were the days
+when the Tories had made their Ashburton Treaty, and when Whigs and
+Radicals must have no theory disturbed. All three parties waylaid
+and mauled the Young Man from the Country, and showed that he knew
+nothing about the country.
+
+As the Young Man from the Country had observed in the Preface to his
+little book, that he "could bide his time", he took all this in
+silent part for eight years. Publishing then, a cheap edition of
+his book, he made no stronger protest than the following:
+
+
+"My readers have opportunities of judging for themselves whether the
+influences and tendencies which I distrusted in America, have any
+existence but in my imagination. They can examine for themselves
+whether there has been anything in the public career of that country
+during these past eight years, or whether there is anything in its
+present position, at home or abroad, which suggests that those
+influences and tendencies really do exist. As they find the fact,
+they will judge me. If they discern any evidences of wrong-going,
+in any direction that I have indicated, they will acknowledge that I
+had reason in what I wrote. If they discern no such thing, they
+will consider me altogether mistaken. I have nothing to defend, or
+to explain away. The truth is the truth; and neither childish
+absurdities, nor unscrupulous contradictions, can make it otherwise.
+The earth would still move round the sun, though the whole Catholic
+Church said No."
+
+
+Twelve more years having since passed away, it may now, at last, be
+simply just towards the Young Man from the Country, to compare what
+he originally wrote, with recent events and their plain motive
+powers. Treating of the House of Representatives at Washington, he
+wrote thus:
+
+
+"Did I recognise in this assembly, a body of men, who, applying
+themselves in a new world to correct some of the falsehoods and
+vices of the old, purified the avenues to Public Life, paved the
+dirty ways to Place and Power, debated and made laws for the Common
+Good, and had no party but their Country?
+
+"I saw in them, the wheels that move the meanest perversion of
+virtuous Political Machinery that the worst tools ever wrought.
+Despicable trickery at elections; under-handed tamperings with
+public officers; cowardly attacks upon opponents, with scurrilous
+newspapers for shields, and hired pens for daggers; shameful
+trucklings to mercenary knaves, whose claim to be considered, is,
+that every day and week they sow new crops of ruin with their venal
+types, which are the dragon's teeth of yore, in everything but
+sharpness; aidings and abettings of every bad inclination in the
+popular mind, and artful suppressions of all its good influences:
+such things as these, and in a word, Dishonest Faction in its most
+depraved and most unblushing form, stared out from every corner of
+the crowded hall.
+
+"Did I see among them, the intelligence and refinement: the true,
+honest, patriotic heart of America? Here and there, were drops of
+its blood and life, but they scarcely coloured the stream of
+desperate adventurers which sets that way for profit and for pay.
+It is the game of these men, and of their profligate organs, to make
+the strife of politics so fierce and brutal, and so destructive of
+all self-respect in worthy men, that sensitive and delicate-minded
+persons shall be kept aloof, and they, and such as they, be left to
+battle out their selfish views unchecked. And thus this lowest of
+all scrambling fights goes on, and they who in other countries
+would, from their intelligence and station, most aspire to make the
+laws, do here recoil the farthest from that degradation.
+
+"That there are, among the representatives of the people in both
+Houses, and among all parties, some men of high character and great
+abilities, I need not say. The foremost among those politicians who
+are known in Europe, have been already described, and I see no
+reason to depart from the rule I have laid down for my guidance, of
+abstaining from all mention of individuals. It will be sufficient
+to add, that to the most favourable accounts that have been written
+of them, I fully and most heartily subscribe; and that personal
+intercourse and free communication have bred within me, not the
+result predicted in the very doubtful proverb, but increased
+admiration and respect."
+
+Towards the end of his book, the Young Man from the Country thus
+expressed himself concerning its people:
+
+
+"They are, by nature, frank, brave, cordial, hospitable, and
+affectionate. Cultivation and refinement seem but to enhance their
+warmth of heart and ardent enthusiasm; and it is the possession of
+these latter qualities in a most remarkable degree, which renders an
+educated American one of the most endearing and most generous of
+friends. I never was so won upon, as by this class; never yielded
+up my full confidence and esteem so readily and pleasurably, as to
+them; never can make again, in half a year, so many friends for whom
+I seem to entertain the regard of half a life.
+
+"These qualities are natural, I implicitly believe, to the whole
+people. That they are, however, sadly sapped and blighted in their
+growth among the mass; and that there are influences at work which
+endanger them still more, and give but little present promise of
+their healthy restoration; is a truth that ought to be told.
+
+"It is an essential part of every national character to pique itself
+mightily upon its faults, and to deduce tokens of its virtue or its
+wisdom from their very exaggeration. One great blemish in the
+popular mind of America, and the prolific parent of an innumerable
+brood of evils, is Universal Distrust. Yet the American citizen
+plumes himself upon this spirit, even when he is sufficiently
+dispassionate to perceive the ruin it works; and will often adduce
+it, in spite of his own reason, as an instance of the great sagacity
+and acuteness of the people, and their superior shrewdness and
+independence.
+
+"'You carry,' says the stranger, 'this jealousy and distrust into
+every transaction of public life. By repelling worthy men from your
+legislative assemblies, it has bred up a class of candidates for the
+suffrage, who, in their every act, disgrace your Institutions and
+your people's choice. It has rendered you so fickle, and so given
+to change, that your inconstancy has passed into a proverb; for you
+no sooner set up an idol firmly, than you are sure to pull it down
+and dash it into fragments: and this, because directly you reward a
+benefactor, or a public-servant, you distrust him, merely because he
+IS rewarded; and immediately apply yourselves to find out, either
+that you have been too bountiful in your acknowledgments, or he
+remiss in his deserts. Any man who attains a high place among you,
+from the President downwards, may date his downfall from that
+moment; for any printed lie that any notorious villain pens,
+although it militate directly against the character and conduct of a
+life, appeals at once to your distrust, and is believed. You will
+strain at a gnat in the way of trustfulness and confidence, however
+fairly won and well deserved; but you will swallow a whole caravan
+of camels, if they be laden with unworthy doubts and mean
+suspicions. Is this well, think you, or likely to elevate the
+character of the governors or the governed, among you?'
+
+"The answer is invariably the same: 'There's freedom of opinion
+here, you know. Every man thinks for himself, and we are not to be
+easily overreached. That's how our people come to be suspicious.'
+
+"Another prominent feature is the love of 'smart' dealing: which
+gilds over many a swindle and gross breach of trust; many a
+defalcation, public and private; and enables many a knave to hold
+his head up with the best, who well deserves a halter: though it
+has not been without its retributive operation, for this smartness
+has done more in a few years to impair the public credit, and to
+cripple the public resources, than dull honesty, however rash, could
+have effected in a century. The merits of a broken speculation, or
+a bankruptcy, or of a successful scoundrel, are not gauged by its or
+his observance of the golden rule, 'Do as you would be done by', but
+are considered with reference to their smartness. I recollect, on
+both occasions of our passing that ill-fated Cairo on the
+Mississippi, remarking on the bad effects such gross deceits must
+have when they exploded, in generating a want of confidence abroad,
+and discouraging foreign investment: but I was given to understand
+that this was a very smart scheme by which a deal of money had been
+made: and that its smartest feature was, that they forgot these
+things abroad, in a very short time, and speculated again, as freely
+as ever. The following dialogue I have held a hundred times: 'Is
+it not a very disgraceful circumstance that such a man as So-and-so
+should be acquiring a large property by the most infamous and odious
+means, and notwithstanding all the crimes of which he has been
+guilty, should be tolerated and abetted by your citizens? He is a
+public nuisance, is he not?' 'Yes, sir.' 'A convicted liar?'
+'Yes, sir.' 'He has been kicked, and cuffed, and caned?' 'Yes,
+sir.' 'And he is utterly dishonourable, debased, and profligate?'
+'Yes, sir.' 'In the name of wonder, then, what is his merit?'
+'Well, sir, he is a smart man.'
+
+"But the foul growth of America has a more tangled root than this;
+and it strikes its fibres, deep in its licentious Press.
+
+"Schools may he erected, East, West, North, and South; pupils be
+taught, and masters reared, by scores upon scores of thousands;
+colleges may thrive, churches may be crammed, temperance may be
+diffused, and advancing knowledge in all other forms walk through
+the land with giant strides; but while the newspaper press of
+America is in, or near, its present abject state, high moral
+improvement in that country is hopeless. Year by year, it must and
+will go back; year by year, the tone of public opinion must sink
+lower down; year by year, the Congress and the Senate must become of
+less account before all decent men; and year by year, the memory of
+the Great Fathers of the Revolution must be outraged more and more,
+in the bad life of their degenerate child.
+
+"Among the herd of journals which are published in the States, there
+are some, the reader scarcely need be told, of character and credit.
+From personal intercourse with accomplished gentlemen connected with
+publications of this class, I have derived both pleasure and profit.
+But the name of these is Few, and of the others Legion; and the
+influence of the good, is powerless to counteract the moral poison
+of the bad.
+
+"Among the gentry of America; among the well-informed and moderate;
+in the learned professions; at the bar and on the bench; there is,
+as there can be, but one opinion, in reference to the vicious
+character of these infamous journals. It is sometimes contended--I
+will not say strangely, for it is natural to seek excuses for such a
+disgrace--that their influence is not so great as a visitor would
+suppose. I must be pardoned for saying that there is no warrant for
+this plea, and that every fact and circumstance tends directly to
+the opposite conclusion.
+
+"When any man, of any grade of desert in intellect or character, can
+climb to any public distinction, no matter what, in America, without
+first grovelling down upon the earth, and bending the knee before
+this monster of depravity; when any private excellence is safe from
+its attacks; when any social confidence is left unbroken by it; or
+any tie of social decency and honour is held in the least regard;
+when any man in that Free Country has freedom of opinion, and
+presumes to think for himself, and speak for himself, without humble
+reference to a censorship which, for its rampant ignorance and base
+dishonesty, he utterly loaths and despises in his heart; when those
+who most acutely feel its infamy and the reproach it casts upon the
+nation, and who most denounce it to each other, dare to set their
+heels upon, and crush it openly, in the sight of all men: then, I
+will believe that its influence is lessening, and men are returning
+to their manly senses. But while that Press has its evil eye in
+every house, and its black hand in every appointment in the state,
+from a president to a postman; while, with ribald slander for its
+only stock in trade, it is the standard literature of an enormous
+class, who must find their reading in a newspaper, or they will not
+read at all; so long must its odium be upon the country's head, and
+so long must the evil it works, be plainly visible in the Republic."
+
+
+The foregoing was written in the year eighteen hundred and forty-
+two. It rests with the reader to decide whether it has received any
+confirmation, or assumed any colour of truth, in or about the year
+eighteen hundred and sixty-two.
+
+
+
+AN ENLIGHTENED CLERGYMAN
+
+
+
+At various places in Suffolk (as elsewhere) penny readings take
+place "for the instruction and amusement of the lower classes".
+There is a little town in Suffolk called Eye, where the subject of
+one of these readings was a tale (by Mr. Wilkie Collins) from the
+last Christmas Number of this Journal, entitled "Picking up Waifs at
+Sea". It appears that the Eye gentility was shocked by the
+introduction of this rude piece among the taste and musical glasses
+of that important town, on which the eyes of Europe are notoriously
+always fixed. In particular, the feelings of the vicar's family
+were outraged; and a Local Organ (say, the Tattlesnivel Bleater)
+consequently doomed the said piece to everlasting oblivion, as being
+of an "injurious tendency!"
+
+When this fearful fact came to the knowledge of the unhappy writer
+of the doomed tale in question, he covered his face with his robe,
+previous to dying decently under the sharp steel of the
+ecclesiastical gentility of the terrible town of Eye. But the
+discovery that he was not alone in his gloomy glory, revived him,
+and he still lives.
+
+For, at Stowmarket, in the aforesaid county of Suffolk, at another
+of those penny readings, it was announced that a certain juvenile
+sketch, culled from a volume of sketches (by Boz) and entitled "The
+Bloomsbury Christening", would be read. Hereupon, the clergyman of
+that place took heart and pen, and addressed the following terrific
+epistle to a gentleman bearing the very appropriate name of Gudgeon:
+
+
+STOWMARKET VICARAGE, Feb. 25, 1861.
+
+SIR,--My attention has been directed to a piece called "The
+Bloomsbury Christening" which you propose to read this evening.
+Without presuming to claim any interference in the arrangement of
+the readings, I would suggest to you whether you have on this
+occasion sufficiently considered the character of the composition
+you have selected. I quite appreciate the laudable motive of the
+promoters of the readings to raise the moral tone amongst the
+working class of the town and to direct this taste in a familiar and
+pleasant manner. "The Bloomsbury Christening" cannot possibly do
+this. It trifles with a sacred ordinance, and the language and
+style, instead of improving the taste, has a direct tendency to
+lower it.
+
+I appeal to your right feeling whether it is desirable to give
+publicity to that which must shock several of your audience, and
+create a smile amongst others, to be indulged in only by violating
+the conscientious scruples of their neighbours.
+
+The ordinance which is here exposed to ridicule is one which is much
+misunderstood and neglected amongst many families belonging to the
+Church of England, and the mode in which it is treated in this
+chapter cannot fail to appear as giving a sanction to, or at least
+excusing, such neglect.
+
+Although you are pledged to the public to give this subject, yet I
+cannot but believe that they would fully justify your substitution
+of it for another did they know the circumstances. An abridgment
+would only lessen the evil in a degree, as it is not only the style
+of the writing but the subject itself which is objectionable.
+
+Excuse me for troubling you, but I felt that, in common with
+yourself, I have a grave responsibility in the matter, and I am most
+truly yours,
+
+T. S. COLES.
+To Mr. J. Gudgeon.
+
+
+It is really necessary to explain that this is not a bad joke. It
+is simply a bad fact.
+
+
+
+RATHER A STRONG DOSE
+
+
+
+"Doctor John Campbell, the minister of the Tabernacle Chapel,
+Finsbury, and editor of the British Banner, etc., with that massive
+vigour which distinguishes his style," did, we are informed by Mr.
+Howitt, "deliver a verdict in the Banner, for November, 1852," of
+great importance and favour to the Table-rapping cause. We are not
+informed whether the Public, sitting in judgment on the question,
+reserved any point in this great verdict for subsequent
+consideration; but the verdict would seem to have been regarded by a
+perverse generation as not quite final, inasmuch as Mr. Howitt finds
+it necessary to re-open the case, a round ten years afterwards, in
+nine hundred and sixty-two stiff octavo pages, published by Messrs.
+Longman and Company.
+
+Mr. Howitt is in such a bristling temper on the Supernatural
+subject, that we will not take the great liberty of arguing any
+point with him. But--with the view of assisting him to make
+converts--we will inform our readers, on his conclusive authority,
+what they are required to believe; premising what may rather
+astonish them in connexion with their views of a certain historical
+trifle, called The Reformation, that their present state of unbelief
+is all the fault of Protestantism, and that "it is high time,
+therefore, to protest against Protestantism".
+
+They will please to believe, by way of an easy beginning, all the
+stories of good and evil demons, ghosts, prophecies, communication
+with spirits, and practice of magic, that ever obtained, or are said
+to have ever obtained, in the North, in the South, in the East, in
+the West, from the earliest and darkest ages, as to which we have
+any hazy intelligence, real or supposititious, down to the yet
+unfinished displacement of the red men in North America. They will
+please to believe that nothing in this wise was changed by the
+fulfilment of our Saviour's mission upon earth; and further, that
+what Saint Paul did, can be done again, and has been done again. As
+this is not much to begin with, they will throw in at this point
+rejection of Faraday and Brewster, and "poor Paley", and implicit
+acceptance of those shining lights, the Reverend Charles Beecher,
+and the Reverend Henry Ward Beecher ("one of the most vigorous and
+eloquent preachers of America"), and the Reverend Adin Ballou.
+
+Having thus cleared the way for a healthy exercise of faith, our
+advancing readers will next proceed especially to believe in the old
+story of the Drummer of Tedworth, in the inspiration of George Fox,
+in "the spiritualism, prophecies, and provision" of Huntington the
+coal-porter (him who prayed for the leather breeches which
+miraculously fitted him), and even in the Cock Lane Ghost. They
+will please wind up, before fetching their breath, with believing
+that there is a close analogy between rejection of any such plain
+and proved facts as those contained in the whole foregoing
+catalogue, and the opposition encountered by the inventors of
+railways, lighting by gas, microscopes and telescopes, and
+vaccination. This stinging consideration they will always carry
+rankling in their remorseful hearts as they advance.
+
+As touching the Cock Lane Ghost, our conscience-stricken readers
+will please particularly to reproach themselves for having ever
+supposed that important spiritual manifestation to have been a gross
+imposture which was thoroughly detected. They will please to
+believe that Dr. Johnson believed in it, and that, in Mr. Howitt's
+words, he "appears to have had excellent reasons for his belief".
+With a view to this end, the faithful will be so good as to
+obliterate from their Boswells the following passage: "Many of my
+readers, I am convinced, are to this hour under an impression that
+Johnson was thus foolishly deceived. It will therefore surprise
+them a good deal when they are informed upon undoubted authority
+that Johnson was one of those by whom the imposture was detected.
+The story had become so popular, that he thought it should be
+investigated, and in this research he was assisted by the Rev. Dr.
+Douglas, now Bishop of Salisbury, the great detector of impostures"-
+-and therefore tremendously obnoxious to Mr. Howitt--"who informs me
+that after the gentlemen who went and examined into the evidence
+were satisfied of its falsity, Johnson wrote in their presence an
+account of it, which was published in the newspapers and Gentleman's
+Magazine, and undeceived the world". But as there will still remain
+another highly inconvenient passage in the Boswells of the true
+believers, they must likewise be at the trouble of cancelling the
+following also, referring to a later time: "He (Johnson) expressed
+great indignation at the imposture of the Cock Lane Ghost, and
+related with much satisfaction how he had assisted in detecting the
+cheat, and had published an account of it in the newspapers".
+
+They will next believe (if they be, in the words of Captain Bobadil,
+"so generously minded") in the transatlantic trance-speakers "who
+professed to speak from direct inspiration", Mrs. Cora Hatch, Mrs.
+Henderson, and Miss Emma Hardinge; and they will believe in those
+eminent ladies having "spoken on Sundays to five hundred thousand
+hearers"--small audiences, by the way, compared with the intelligent
+concourse recently assembled in the city of New York, to do honour
+to the Nuptials of General the Honourable T. Barnum Thumb. At about
+this stage of their spiritual education they may take the
+opportunity of believing in "letters from a distinguished gentleman
+of New York, in which the frequent appearance of the gentleman's
+deceased wife and of Dr. Franklin, to him and other well-known
+friends, are unquestionably unequalled in the annals of the
+marvellous". Why these modest appearances should seem at all out of
+the common way to Mr. Howitt (who would be in a state of flaming
+indignation if we thought them so), we could not imagine, until we
+found on reading further, "it is solemnly stated that the witnesses
+have not only seen but touched these spirits, and handled the
+clothes and hair of Franklin". Without presuming to go Mr. Howitt's
+length of considering this by any means a marvellous experience, we
+yet venture to confess that it has awakened in our mind many
+interesting speculations touching the present whereabout in space,
+of the spirits of Mr. Howitt's own departed boots and hats.
+
+The next articles of belief are Belief in the moderate figures of
+"thirty thousand media in the United States in 1853"; and in two
+million five hundred thousand spiritualists in the same country of
+composed minds, in 1855, "professing to have arrived at their
+convictions of spiritual communication from personal experience";
+and in "an average rate of increase of three hundred thousand per
+annum", still in the same country of calm philosophers. Belief in
+spiritual knockings, in all manner of American places, and, among
+others, in the house of "a Doctor Phelps at Stratford, Connecticut,
+a man of the highest character for intelligence", says Mr. Howitt,
+and to whom we willingly concede the possession of far higher
+intelligence than was displayed by his spiritual knocker, in
+"frequently cutting to pieces the clothes of one of his boys", and
+in breaking "seventy-one panes of glass"--unless, indeed, the
+knocker, when in the body, was connected with the tailoring and
+glazing interests. Belief in immaterial performers playing (in the
+dark though: they are obstinate about its being in the dark) on
+material instruments of wood, catgut, brass, tin, and parchment.
+Your belief is further requested in "the Kentucky Jerks". The
+spiritual achievements thus euphoniously denominated "appear", says
+Mr. Howitt, "to have been of a very disorderly kind". It appears
+that a certain Mr. Doke, a Presbyterian clergyman, "was first seized
+by the jerks", and the jerks laid hold of Mr. Doke in that
+unclerical way and with that scant respect for his cloth, that they
+"twitched him about in a most extraordinary manner, often when in
+the pulpit, and caused him to shout aloud, and run out of the pulpit
+into the woods, screaming like a madman. When the fit was over, he
+returned calmly to his pulpit and finished the service." The
+congregation having waited, we presume, and edified themselves with
+the distant bellowings of Doke in the woods, until he came back
+again, a little warm and hoarse, but otherwise in fine condition.
+"People were often seized at hotels, and at table would, on lifting
+a glass to drink, jerk the liquor to the ceiling; ladies would at
+the breakfast-table suddenly be compelled to throw aloft their
+coffee, and frequently break the cup and saucer." A certain
+venturesome clergyman vowed that he would preach down the Jerks,
+"but he was seized in the midst of his attempt, and made so
+ridiculous that he withdrew himself from further notice"--an example
+much to be commended. That same favoured land of America has been
+particularly favoured in the development of "innumerable mediums",
+and Mr. Howitt orders you to believe in Daniel Dunglas Home, Andrew
+Davis Jackson, and Thomas L. Harris, as "the three most remarkable,
+or most familiar, on this side of the Atlantic". Concerning Mr.
+Home, the articles of belief (besides removal of furniture) are,
+That through him raps have been given and communications made from
+deceased friends. That "his hand has been seized by spirit
+influence, and rapid communications written out, of a surprising
+character to those to whom they were addressed". That at his
+bidding, "spirit hands have appeared which have been seen, felt, and
+recognised frequently, by persons present, as those of deceased
+friends". That he has been frequently lifted up and carried,
+floating "as it were" through a room, near the ceiling. That in
+America, "all these phenomena have displayed themselves in greater
+force than here"--which we have not the slightest doubt of. That he
+is "the planter of spiritualism all over Europe". That "by
+circumstances that no man could have devised, he became the guest of
+the Emperor of the French, of the King of Holland, of the Czar of
+Russia, and of many lesser princes". That he returned from "this
+unpremeditated missionary tour", "endowed with competence"; but not
+before, "at the Tuileries, on one occasion when the emperor,
+empress, a distinguished lady, and himself only were sitting at
+table, a hand appeared, took up a pen, and wrote, in a strong and
+well-known character, the word Napoleon. The hand was then
+successively presented to the several personages of the party to
+kiss." The stout believer, having disposed of Mr. Home, and rested
+a little, will then proceed to believe in Andrew Davis Jackson, or
+Andrew Jackson Davis (Mr. Howitt, having no Medium at hand to settle
+this difference and reveal the right name of the seer, calls him by
+both names), who merely "beheld all the essential natures of things,
+saw the interior of men and animals, as perfectly as their exterior;
+and described them in language so correct, that the most able
+technologists could not surpass him. He pointed out the proper
+remedies for all the complaints, and the shops where they were to be
+obtained";--in the latter respect appearing to hail from an
+advertising circle, as we conceive. It was also in this gentleman's
+limited department to "see the metals in the earth", and to have
+"the most distant regions and their various productions present
+before him". Having despatched this tough case, the believer will
+pass on to Thomas L. Harris, and will swallow HIM easily, together
+with "whole epics" of his composition; a certain work "of scarcely
+less than Miltonic grandeur", called The Lyric of the Golden Age--a
+lyric pretty nigh as long as one of Mr. Howitt's volumes--dictated
+by Mr. (not Mrs.) Harris to the publisher in ninety-four hours; and
+several extempore sermons, possessing the remarkably lucid property
+of being "full, unforced, out-gushing, unstinted, and absorbing".
+The candidate for examination in pure belief, will then pass on to
+the spirit-photography department; this, again, will be found in so-
+favoured America, under the superintendence of Medium Mumler, a
+photographer of Boston: who was "astonished" (though, on Mr.
+Howitt's showing, he surely ought not to have been) "on taking a
+photograph of himself, to find also by his side the figure of a
+young girl, which he immediately recognised as that of a deceased
+relative. The circumstance made a great excitement. Numbers of
+persons rushed to his rooms, and many have found deceased friends
+photographed with themselves." (Perhaps Mr. Mumler, too, may become
+"endowed with competence" in time. Who knows?) Finally, the true
+believers in the gospel according to Howitt, have, besides, but to
+pin their faith on "ladies who see spirits habitually", on ladies
+who KNOW they have a tendency to soar in the air on sufficient
+provocation, and on a few other gnats to be taken after their
+camels, and they shall be pronounced by Mr. Howitt not of the
+stereotyped class of minds, and not partakers of "the astonishing
+ignorance of the press", and shall receive a first-class certificate
+of merit.
+
+But before they pass through this portal into the Temple of Serene
+Wisdom, we, halting blind and helpless on the steps, beg to suggest
+to them what they must at once and for ever disbelieve. They must
+disbelieve that in the dark times, when very few were versed in what
+are now the mere recreations of Science, and when those few formed a
+priesthood-class apart, any marvels were wrought by the aid of
+concave mirrors and a knowledge of the properties of certain odours
+and gases, although the self-same marvels could be reproduced before
+their eyes at the Polytechnic Institution, Regent Street, London,
+any day in the year. They must by no means believe that Conjuring
+and Ventriloquism are old trades. They must disbelieve all
+Philosophical Transactions containing the records of painful and
+careful inquiry into now familiar disorders of the senses of seeing
+and hearing, and into the wonders of somnambulism, epilepsy,
+hysteria, miasmatic influence, vegetable poisons derived by whole
+communities from corrupted air, diseased imitation, and moral
+infection. They must disbelieve all such awkward leading cases as
+the case of the Woodstock Commissioners and their man, and the case
+of the Identity of the Stockwell Ghost, with the maid-servant. They
+must disbelieve the vanishing of champion haunted houses (except,
+indeed, out of Mr. Howitt's book), represented to have been closed
+and ruined for years, before one day's inquiry by four gentlemen
+associated with this journal, and one hour's reference to the Local
+Rate-books. They must disbelieve all possibility of a human
+creature on the last verge of the dark bridge from Life to Death,
+being mysteriously able, in occasional cases, so to influence the
+mind of one very near and dear, as vividly to impress that mind with
+some disturbed sense of the solemn change impending. They must
+disbelieve the possibility of the lawful existence of a class of
+intellects which, humbly conscious of the illimitable power of GOD
+and of their own weakness and ignorance, never deny that He can
+cause the souls of the dead to revisit the earth, or that He may
+have caused the souls of the dead to revisit the earth, or that He
+can cause any awful or wondrous thing to be; but to deny the
+likelihood of apparitions or spirits coming here upon the stupidest
+of bootless errands, and producing credentials tantamount to a
+solicitation of our vote and interest and next proxy, to get them
+into the Asylum for Idiots. They must disbelieve the right of
+Christian people who do NOT protest against Protestantism, but who
+hold it to be a barrier against the darkest superstitions that can
+enslave the soul, to guard with jealousy all approaches tending down
+to Cock Lane Ghosts and suchlike infamous swindles, widely degrading
+when widely believed in; and they must disbelieve that such people
+have the right to know, and that it is their duty to know, wonder-
+workers by their fruits, and to test miracle-mongers by the tests of
+probability, analogy, and common sense. They must disbelieve all
+rational explanations of thoroughly proved experiences (only) which
+appear supernatural, derived from the average experience and study
+of the visible world. They must disbelieve the speciality of the
+Master and the Disciples, and that it is a monstrosity to test the
+wonders of show-folk by the same touchstone. Lastly, they must
+disbelieve that one of the best accredited chapters in the history
+of mankind is the chapter that records the astonishing deceits
+continually practised, with no object or purpose but the distorted
+pleasure of deceiving.
+
+We have summed up a few--not nearly all--of the articles of belief
+and disbelief to which Mr. Howitt most arrogantly demands an
+implicit adherence. To uphold these, he uses a book as a Clown in a
+Pantomime does, and knocks everybody on the head with it who comes
+in his way. Moreover, he is an angrier personage than the Clown,
+and does not experimentally try the effect of his red-hot poker on
+your shins, but straightway runs you through the body and soul with
+it. He is always raging to tell you that if you are not Howitt, you
+are Atheist and Anti-Christ. He is the sans-culotte of the
+Spiritual Revolution, and will not hear of your accepting this point
+and rejecting that;--down your throat with them all, one and
+indivisible, at the point of the pike; No Liberty, Totality,
+Fraternity, or Death!
+
+Without presuming to question that "it is high time to protest
+against Protestantism" on such very substantial grounds as Mr.
+Howitt sets forth, we do presume to think that it is high time to
+protest against Mr. Howitt's spiritualism, as being a little in
+excess of the peculiar merit of Thomas L. Harris's sermons, and
+somewhat TOO "full, out-gushing, unstinted, and absorbing".
+
+
+
+THE MARTYR MEDIUM
+
+
+
+"After the valets, the master!" is Mr. Fechter's rallying cry in the
+picturesque romantic drama which attracts all London to the Lyceum
+Theatre. After the worshippers and puffers of Mr. Daniel Dunglas
+Home, the spirit medium, comes Mr. Daniel Dunglas Home himself, in
+one volume. And we must, for the honour of Literature, plainly
+express our great surprise and regret that he comes arm-in-arm with
+such good company as Messrs. Longman and Company.
+
+We have already summed up Mr. Home's demands on the public capacity
+of swallowing, as sounded through the war-denouncing trumpet of Mr.
+Howitt, and it is not our intention to revive the strain as
+performed by Mr. Home on his own melodious instrument. We notice,
+by the way, that in that part of the Fantasia where the hand of the
+first Napoleon is supposed to be reproduced, recognised, and kissed,
+at the Tuileries, Mr. Home subdues the florid effects one might have
+expected after Mr. Howitt's execution, and brays in an extremely
+general manner. And yet we observe Mr. Home to be in other things
+very reliant on Mr. Howitt, of whom he entertains as gratifying an
+opinion as Mr. Howitt entertains of him: dwelling on his "deep
+researches into this subject", and of his "great work now ready for
+the press", and of his "eloquent and forcible" advocacy, and eke of
+his "elaborate and almost exhaustive work", which Mr. Home trusts
+will be "extensively read". But, indeed, it would seem to be the
+most reliable characteristic of the Dear Spirits, though very
+capricious in other particulars, that they always form their circles
+into what may be described, in worldly terms, as A Mutual Admiration
+and Complimentation Company (Limited).
+
+Mr. Home's book is entitled Incidents in My Life. We will extract a
+dozen sample passages from it, as variations on and phrases of
+harmony in, the general strain for the Trumpet, which we have
+promised not to repeat.
+
+
+1. MR. HOME IS SUPERNATURALLY NURSED
+
+
+"I cannot remember when first I became subject to the curious
+phenomena which have now for so long attended me, but my aunt and
+others have told me that when I was a baby my cradle was frequently
+rocked, as if some kind guardian spirit was attending me in my
+slumbers."
+
+
+2. DISRESPECTFUL CONDUCT OF MR. HOME'S AUNT NEVERTHELESS
+
+
+"In her uncontrollable anger she seized a chair and threw it at me."
+
+
+3. PUNISHMENT OF MR. HOME'S AUNT
+
+
+"Upon one occasion as the table was being thus moved about of
+itself, my aunt brought the family Bible, and placing it on the
+table, said, 'There, that will soon drive the devils away'; but to
+her astonishment the table only moved in a more lively manner, as if
+pleased to bear such a burden." (We believe this is constantly
+observed in pulpits and church reading desks, which are invariably
+lively.) "Seeing this she was greatly incensed, and determined to
+stop it, she angrily placed her whole weight on the table, and was
+actually lifted up with it bodily from the floor."
+
+
+4. TRIUMPHANT EFFECT OF THIS DISCIPLINE ON MR. HOME'S AUNT
+
+
+"And she felt it a duty that I should leave her house, and which I
+did."
+
+
+5. MR. HOME'S MISSION
+
+
+It was communicated to him by the spirit of his mother, in the
+following terms: "Daniel, fear not, my child, God is with you, and
+who shall be against you? Seek to do good: be truthful and truth-
+loving, and you will prosper, my child. Yours is a glorious
+mission--you will convince the infidel, cure the sick, and console
+the weeping." It is a coincidence that another eminent man, with
+several missions, heard a voice from the Heavens blessing him, when
+he also was a youth, and saying, "You will be rewarded, my son, in
+time". This Medium was the celebrated Baron Munchausen, who relates
+the experience in the opening of the second chapter of the incidents
+in HIS life.
+
+
+6. MODEST SUCCESS OF MR. HOME'S MISSION
+
+
+"Certainly these phenomena, whether from God or from the devil, have
+in ten years caused more converts to the great truths of immortality
+and angel communion, with all that flows from these great facts,
+than all the sects in Christendom have made during the same period."
+
+
+7. WHAT THE FIRST COMPOSERS SAY OF THE SPIRIT-MUSIC, TO MR. HOME
+
+
+"As to the music, it has been my good fortune to be on intimate
+terms with some of the first composers of the day, and more than one
+of them have said of such as they have heard, that it is such music
+as only angels could make, and no man could write it."
+
+These "first composers" are not more particularly named. We shall
+therefore be happy to receive and file at the office of this
+Journal, the testimonials in the foregoing terms of Dr. Sterndale
+Bennett, Mr. Balfe, Mr. Macfarren, Mr. Benedict, Mr. Vincent
+Wallace, Signor Costa, M. Auber, M. Gounod, Signor Rossini, and
+Signor Verdi. We shall also feel obliged to Mr. Alfred Mellon, who
+is no doubt constantly studying this wonderful music, under the
+Medium's auspices, if he will note on paper, from memory, say a
+single sheet of the same. Signor Giulio Regondi will then perform
+it, as correctly as a mere mortal can, on the Accordion, at the next
+ensuing concert of the Philharmonic Society; on which occasion the
+before-mentioned testimonials will be conspicuously displayed in the
+front of the orchestra.
+
+
+8. MR. HOME'S MIRACULOUS INFANT
+
+
+"On the 26th April, old style, or 8th May, according to our style,
+at seven in the evening, and as the snow was fast falling, our
+little boy was born at the town house, situate on the Gagarines
+Quay, in St. Petersburg, where we were still staying. A few hours
+after his birth, his mother, the nurse, and I heard for several
+hours the warbling of a bird as if singing over him. Also that
+night, and for two or three nights afterwards, a bright starlike
+light, which was clearly visible from the partial darkness of the
+room, in which there was only a night-lamp burning, appeared several
+times directly I over its head, where it remained for some moments,
+and then slowly moved in the direction of the door, where it
+disappeared. This was also seen by each of us at the same time.
+The light was more condensed than those which have been so often
+seen in my presence upon previous and subsequent occasions. It was
+brighter and more distinctly globular. I do not believe that it
+came through my mediumship, but rather through that of the child,
+who has manifested on several occasions the presence of the gift. I
+do not like to allude to such a matter, but as there are more
+strange things in Heaven and earth than are dreamt of, even in my
+philosophy, I do not feel myself at liberty to omit stating, that
+during the latter part of my wife's pregnancy, we thought it better
+that she should not join in Seances, because it was found that
+whenever the rappings occurred in the room, a simultaneous movement
+of the child was distinctly felt, perfectly in unison with the
+sounds. When there were three sounds, three movements were felt,
+and so on, and when five sounds were heard, which is generally the
+call for the alphabet, she felt the five internal movements, and she
+would frequently, when we were mistaken in the latter, correct us
+from what the child indicated."
+
+We should ask pardon of our readers for sullying our paper with this
+nauseous matter, if without it they could adequately understand what
+Mr. Home's book is.
+
+
+9. CAGLIOSTRO'S SPIRIT CALLS ON MR. HOME
+
+
+Prudently avoiding the disagreeable question of his giving himself,
+both in this state of existence and in his spiritual circle, a name
+to which he never had any pretensions whatever, and likewise
+prudently suppressing any reference to his amiable weakness as a
+swindler and an infamous trafficker in his own wife, the guileless
+Mr. Balsamo delivered, in a "distinct voice", this distinct
+celestial utterance--unquestionably punctuated in a supernatural
+manner: "My power was that of a mesmerist, but all-misunderstood by
+those about me, my biographers have even done me injustice, but I
+care not for the untruths of earth".
+
+
+10. ORACULAR STATE OF MR. HOME
+
+
+"After various manifestations, Mr. Home went into the trance, and
+addressing a person present, said, 'You ask what good are such
+trivial manifestations, such as rapping, table-moving, etc.? God is
+a better judge than we are what is fitted for humanity, immense
+results may spring from trivial things. The steam from a kettle is
+a small thing, but look at the locomotive! The electric spark from
+the back of a cat is a small thing, but see the wonders of
+electricity! The raps are small things, but their results will lead
+you to the Spirit-World, and to eternity! Why should great results
+spring from such small causes? Christ was born in a manger, he was
+not born a King. When you tell me why he was born in a manger, I
+will tell you why these manifestations, so trivial, so undignified
+as they appear to you, have been appointed to convince the world of
+the truth of spiritualism.'"
+
+Wonderful! Clearly direct Inspiration!--And yet, perhaps, hardly
+worth the trouble of going "into the trance" for, either. Amazing
+as the revelation is, we seem to have heard something like it from
+more than one personage who was wide awake. A quack doctor, in an
+open barouche (attended by a barrel-organ and two footmen in brass
+helmets), delivered just such another address within our hearing,
+outside a gate of Paris, not two months ago.
+
+
+11. THE TESTIMONY OF MR. HOME'S BOOTS
+
+
+"The lady of the house turned to me and said abruptly, 'Why, you are
+sitting in the air'; and on looking, we found that the chair
+remained in its place, but that I was elevated two or three inches
+above it, and my feet not touching the floor. This may show how
+utterly unconscious I am at times to the sensation of levitation.
+As is usual, when I had not got above the level of the heads of
+those about me, and when they change their position much--as they
+frequently do in looking wistfully at such a phenomenon--I came down
+again, but not till I had remained so raised about half a minute
+from the time of its being first seen. I was now impressed to leave
+the table, and was soon carried to the lofty ceiling. The Count de
+B- left his place at the table, and coming under where I was, said,
+'Now, young Home, come and let me touch your feet.' I told him I
+had no volition in the matter, but perhaps the spirits would kindly
+allow me to come down to him. They did so, by floating me down to
+him, and my feet were soon in his outstretched hands. He seized my
+boots, and now I was again elevated, he holding tightly, and pulling
+at my feet, till the boots I wore, which had elastic sides, came off
+and remained in his hands."
+
+
+12. THE UNCOMBATIVE NATURE OF MR. HOME
+
+
+As there is a maudlin complaint in this book, about men of Science
+being hard upon "the 'Orphan' Home", and as the "gentle and
+uncombative nature" of this Medium in a martyred point of view is
+pathetically commented on by the anonymous literary friend who
+supplies him with an introduction and appendix--rather at odds with
+Mr. Howitt, who is so mightily triumphant about the same Martyr's
+reception by crowned heads, and about the competence he has become
+endowed with--we cull from Mr. Home's book one or two little
+illustrative flowers. Sir David Brewster (a pestilent unbeliever)
+"has come before the public in few matters which have brought more
+shame upon him than his conduct and assertions on this occasion, in
+which he manifested not only a disregard for truth, but also a
+disloyalty to scientific observation, and to the use of his own
+eyesight and natural faculties". The same unhappy Sir David
+Brewster's "character may be the better known, not only for his
+untruthful dealing with this subject, but also in his own domain of
+science in which the same unfaithfulness to truth will be seen to be
+the characteristic of his mind". Again, he "is really not a man
+over whom victory is any honour". Again, "not only he, but
+Professor Faraday have had time and ample leisure to regret that
+they should have so foolishly pledged themselves", etc. A Faraday a
+fool in the sight of a Home! That unjust judge and whited wall,
+Lord Brougham, has his share of this Martyr Medium's
+uncombativeness. "In order that he might not be compelled to deny
+Sir David's statements, he found it necessary that he should be
+silent, and I have some reason to complain that his Lordship
+preferred sacrificing me to his desire not to immolate his friend."
+M. Arago also came off with very doubtful honours from a wrestle
+with the uncombative Martyr; who is perfectly clear (and so are we,
+let us add) that scientific men are not the men for his purpose. Of
+course, he is the butt of "utter and acknowledged ignorance", and of
+"the most gross and foolish statements", and of "the unjust and
+dishonest", and of "the press-gang", and of crowds of other alien
+and combative adjectives, participles, and substantives.
+
+Nothing is without its use, and even this odious book may do some
+service. Not because it coolly claims for the writer and his
+disciples such powers as were wielded by the Saviour and the
+Apostles; not because it sees no difference between twelve table
+rappers in these days, and "twelve fishermen" in those; not because
+it appeals for precedents to statements extracted from the most
+ignorant and wretched of mankind, by cruel torture, and constantly
+withdrawn when the torture was withdrawn; not because it sets forth
+such a strange confusion of ideas as is presented by one of the
+faithful when, writing of a certain sprig of geranium handed by an
+invisible hand, he adds in ecstasies, "WHICH WE HAVE PLANTED AND IT
+IS GROWING, SO THAT IT IS NO DELUSION, NO FAIRY MONEY TURNED INTO
+DROSS OR LEAVES"--as if it followed that the conjuror's half-crowns
+really did become invisible and in that state fly, because he
+afterwards cuts them out of a real orange; or as if the conjuror's
+pigeon, being after the discharge of his gun, a real live pigeon
+fluttering on the target, must therefore conclusively be a pigeon,
+fired, whole, living and unshattered, out of the gun!--not because
+of the exposure of any of these weaknesses, or a thousand such, are
+these moving incidents in the life of the Martyr Medium, and similar
+productions, likely to prove useful, but because of their uniform
+abuse of those who go to test the reality of these alleged
+phenomena, and who come away incredulous. There is an old homely
+proverb concerning pitch and its adhesive character, which we hope
+this significant circumstance may impress on many minds. The writer
+of these lines has lately heard overmuch touching young men of
+promise in the imaginative arts, "towards whom" Martyr Mediums
+assisting at evening parties feel themselves "drawn". It may be a
+hint to such young men to stick to their own drawing, as being of a
+much better kind, and to leave Martyr Mediums alone in their glory.
+
+As there is a good deal in these books about "lying spirits", we
+will conclude by putting a hypothetical case. Supposing that a
+Medium (Martyr or otherwise) were established for a time in the
+house of an English gentleman abroad; say, somewhere in Italy.
+Supposing that the more marvellous the Medium became, the more
+suspicious of him the lady of the house became. Supposing that the
+lady, her distrust once aroused, were particularly struck by the
+Medium's exhibiting a persistent desire to commit her, somehow or
+other, to the disclosure of the manner of the death, to him unknown,
+of a certain person. Supposing that she at length resolved to test
+the Medium on this head, and, therefore, on a certain evening
+mentioned a wholly supposititious manner of death (which was not the
+real manner of death, nor anything at all like it) within the range
+of his listening ears. And supposing that a spirit presently
+afterwards rapped out its presence, claiming to be the spirit of
+that deceased person, and claiming to have departed this life in
+that supposititious way. Would that be a lying spirit? Or would it
+he a something else, tainting all that Medium's statements and
+suppressions, even if they were not in themselves of a manifestly
+outrageous character?
+
+
+
+THE LATE MR. STANFIELD
+
+
+
+Every Artist, be he writer, painter, musician, or actor, must bear
+his private sorrows as he best can, and must separate them from the
+exercise of his public pursuit. But it sometimes happens, in
+compensation, that his private loss of a dear friend represents a
+loss on the part of the whole community. Then he may, without
+obtrusion of his individuality, step forth to lay his little wreath
+upon that dear friend's grave.
+
+On Saturday, the eighteenth of this present month, Clarkson
+Stanfield died. On the afternoon of that day, England lost the
+great marine painter of whom she will be boastful ages hence; the
+National Historian of her speciality, the Sea; the man famous in all
+countries for his marvellous rendering of the waves that break upon
+her shores, of her ships and seamen, of her coasts and skies, of her
+storms and sunshine, of the many marvels of the deep. He who holds
+the oceans in the hollow of His hand had given, associated with
+them, wonderful gifts into his keeping; he had used them well
+through threescore and fourteen years; and, on the afternoon of that
+spring day, relinquished them for ever.
+
+It is superfluous to record that the painter of "The Battle of
+Trafalgar", of the "Victory being towed into Gibraltar with the body
+of Nelson on Board", of "The Morning after the Wreck", of "The
+Abandoned", of fifty more such works, died in his seventy-fourth
+year, "Mr." Stanfield.--He was an Englishman.
+
+Those grand pictures will proclaim his powers while paint and canvas
+last. But the writer of these words had been his friend for thirty
+years; and when, a short week or two before his death, he laid that
+once so skilful hand upon the writer's breast and told him they
+would meet again, "but not here", the thoughts of the latter turned,
+for the time, so little to his noble genius, and so much to his
+noble nature!
+
+He was the soul of frankness, generosity, and simplicity. The most
+genial, the most affectionate, the most loving, and the most lovable
+of men. Success had never for an instant spoiled him. His interest
+in the Theatre as an Institution--the best picturesqueness of which
+may be said to be wholly due to him--was faithful to the last. His
+belief in a Play, his delight in one, the ease with which it moved
+him to tears or to laughter, were most remarkable evidences of the
+heart he must have put into his old theatrical work, and of the
+thorough purpose and sincerity with which it must have been done.
+The writer was very intimately associated with him in some amateur
+plays; and day after day, and night after night, there were the same
+unquenchable freshness, enthusiasm, and impressibility in him,
+though broken in health, even then.
+
+No Artist can ever have stood by his art with a quieter dignity than
+he always did. Nothing would have induced him to lay it at the feet
+of any human creature. To fawn, or to toady, or to do undeserved
+homage to any one, was an absolute impossibility with him. And yet
+his character was so nicely balanced that he was the last man in the
+world to be suspected of self-assertion, and his modesty was one of
+his most special qualities.
+
+He was a charitable, religious, gentle, truly good man. A genuine
+man, incapable of pretence or of concealment. He had been a sailor
+once; and all the best characteristics that are popularly attributed
+to sailors, being his, and being in him refined by the influences of
+his Art, formed a whole not likely to be often seen. There is no
+smile that the writer can recall, like his; no manner so naturally
+confiding and so cheerfully engaging. When the writer saw him for
+the last time on earth, the smile and the manner shone out once
+through the weakness, still: the bright unchanging Soul within the
+altered face and form.
+
+No man was ever held in higher respect by his friends, and yet his
+intimate friends invariably addressed him and spoke of him by a pet
+name. It may need, perhaps, the writer's memory and associations to
+find in this a touching expression of his winning character, his
+playful smile, and pleasant ways. "You know Mrs. Inchbald's story,
+Nature and Art?" wrote Thomas Hood, once, in a letter: "What a fine
+Edition of Nature and Art is Stanfield!"
+
+Gone! And many and many a dear old day gone with him! But their
+memories remain. And his memory will not soon fade out, for he has
+set his mark upon the restless waters, and his fame will long be
+sounded in the roar of the sea.
+
+
+
+A SLIGHT QUESTION OF FACT
+
+
+
+It is never well for the public interest that the originator of any
+social reform should be soon forgotten. Further, it is neither
+wholesome nor right (being neither generous nor just) that the merit
+of his work should be gradually transferred elsewhere.
+
+Some few weeks ago, our contemporary, the Pall Mall Gazette, in
+certain strictures on our Theatres which we are very far indeed from
+challenging, remarked on the first effectual discouragement of an
+outrage upon decency which the lobbies and upper-boxes of even our
+best Theatres habitually paraded within the last twenty or thirty
+years. From those remarks it might appear as though no such Manager
+of Covent Garden or Drury Lane as Mr. Macready had ever existed.
+
+It is a fact beyond all possibility of question, that Mr. Macready,
+on assuming the management of Covent Garden Theatre in 1837, did
+instantly set himself, regardless of precedent and custom down to
+that hour obtaining, rigidly to suppress this shameful thing, and
+did rigidly suppress and crush it during his whole management of
+that theatre, and during his whole subsequent management of Drury
+Lane. That he did so, as certainly without favour as without fear;
+that he did so, against his own immediate interests; that he did so,
+against vexations and oppositions which might have cooled the ardour
+of a less earnest man, or a less devoted artist; can be better known
+to no one than the writer of the present words, whose name stands at
+the head of these pages.
+
+
+
+LANDOR'S LIFE
+
+
+
+Prefixed to the second volume of Mr. Forster's admirable biography
+of Walter Savage Landor, {1} is an engraving from a portrait of that
+remarkable man when seventy-seven years of age, by Boxall. The
+writer of these lines can testify that the original picture is a
+singularly good likeness, the result of close and subtle observation
+on the part of the painter; but, for this very reason, the engraving
+gives a most inadequate idea of the merit of the picture and the
+character of the man.
+
+From the engraving, the arms and hands are omitted. In the picture,
+they are, as they were in nature, indispensable to a correct reading
+of the vigorous face. The arms were very peculiar. They were
+rather short, and were curiously restrained and checked in their
+action at the elbows; in the action of the hands, even when
+separately clenched, there was the same kind of pause, and a
+noticeable tendency to relaxation on the part of the thumb. Let the
+face be never so intense or fierce, there was a commentary of
+gentleness in the hands, essential to be taken along with it. Like
+Hamlet, Landor would speak daggers, but use none. In the expression
+of his hands, though angrily closed, there was always gentleness and
+tenderness; just as when they were open, and the handsome old
+gentleman would wave them with a little courtly flourish that sat
+well upon him, as he recalled some classic compliment that he had
+rendered to some reigning Beauty, there was a chivalrous grace about
+them such as pervades his softer verses. Thus the fictitious Mr.
+Boythorn (to whom we may refer without impropriety in this
+connexion, as Mr. Forster does) declaims "with unimaginable energy"
+the while his bird is "perched upon his thumb", and he "softly
+smooths its feathers with his forefinger".
+
+From the spirit of Mr. Forster's Biography these characteristic
+hands are never omitted, and hence (apart from its literary merits)
+its great value. As the same masterly writer's Life and Times of
+Oliver Goldsmith is a generous and yet conscientious picture of a
+period, so this is a not less generous and yet conscientious picture
+of one life; of a life, with all its aspirations, achievements, and
+disappointments; all its capabilities, opportunities, and
+irretrievable mistakes. It is essentially a sad book, and herein
+lies proof of its truth and worth. The life of almost any man
+possessing great gifts, would be a sad book to himself; and this
+book enables us not only to see its subject, but to be its subject,
+if we will.
+
+Mr. Forster is of opinion that "Landor's fame very surely awaits
+him". This point admitted or doubted, the value of the book remains
+the same. It needs not to know his works (otherwise than through
+his biographer's exposition), it needs not to have known himself, to
+find a deep interest in these pages. More or less of their warning
+is in every conscience; and some admiration of a fine genius, and of
+a great, wild, generous nature, incapable of mean self-extenuation
+or dissimulation--if unhappily incapable of self-repression too--
+should be in every breast. "There may be still living many
+persons", Walter Landor's brother, Robert, writes to Mr. Forster of
+this book, "who would contradict any narrative of yours in which the
+best qualities were remembered, the worst forgotten." Mr. Forster's
+comment is: "I had not waited for this appeal to resolve, that, if
+this memoir were written at all, it should contain, as far as might
+lie within my power, a fair statement of the truth". And this
+eloquent passage of truth immediately follows: "Few of his
+infirmities are without something kindly or generous about them; and
+we are not long in discovering there is nothing so wildly incredible
+that he will not himself in perfect good faith believe. When he
+published his first book of poems on quitting Oxford, the profits
+were to be reserved for a distressed clergyman. When he published
+his Latin poems, the poor of Leipzig were to have the sum they
+realised. When his comedy was ready to be acted, a Spaniard who had
+sheltered him at Castro was to be made richer by it. When he
+competed for the prize of the Academy of Stockholm, it was to go to
+the poor of Sweden. If nobody got anything from any one of these
+enterprises, the fault at all events was not his. With his
+extraordinary power of forgetting disappointments, he was prepared
+at each successive failure to start afresh, as if each had been a
+triumph. I shall have to delineate this peculiarity as strongly in
+the last half as in the first half of his life, and it was certainly
+an amiable one. He was ready at all times to set aside, out of his
+own possessions, something for somebody who might please him for the
+time; and when frailties of temper and tongue are noted, this other
+eccentricity should not be omitted. He desired eagerly the love as
+well as the good opinion of those whom for the time he esteemed, and
+no one was more affectionate while under such influences. It is not
+a small virtue to feel such genuine pleasure, as he always did in
+giving and receiving pleasure. His generosity, too, was bestowed
+chiefly on those who could make small acknowledgment in thanks and
+no return in kind."
+
+Some of his earlier contemporaries may have thought him a vain man.
+Most assuredly he was not, in the common acceptation of the term. A
+vain man has little or no admiration to bestow upon competitors.
+Landor had an inexhaustible fund. He thought well of his writings,
+or he would not have preserved them. He said and wrote that he
+thought well of them, because that was his mind about them, and he
+said and wrote his mind. He was one of the few men of whom you
+might always know the whole: of whom you might always know the
+worst, as well as the best. He had no reservations or duplicities.
+"No, by Heaven!" he would say ("with unimaginable energy"), if any
+good adjective were coupled with him which he did not deserve: "I
+am nothing of the kind. I wish I were; but I don't deserve the
+attribute, and I never did, and I never shall!" His intense
+consciousness of himself never led to his poorly excusing himself,
+and seldom to his violently asserting himself. When he told some
+little story of his bygone social experiences, in Florence, or where
+not, as he was fond of doing, it took the innocent form of making
+all the interlocutors, Landors. It was observable, too, that they
+always called him "Mr. Landor"--rather ceremoniously and
+submissively. There was a certain "Caro Pedre Abete Marina"--
+invariably so addressed in these anecdotes--who figured through a
+great many of them, and who always expressed himself in this
+deferential tone.
+
+Mr. Forster writes of Landor's character thus:
+
+
+"A man must be judged, at first, by what he says and does. But with
+him such extravagance as I have referred to was little more than the
+habitual indulgence (on such themes) of passionate feelings and
+language, indecent indeed but utterly purposeless; the mere
+explosion of wrath provoked by tyranny or cruelty; the
+irregularities of an overheated steam-engine too weak for its own
+vapour. It is very certain that no one could detest oppression more
+truly than Landor did in all seasons and times; and if no one
+expressed that scorn, that abhorrence of tyranny and fraud, more
+hastily or more intemperately, all his fire and fury signified
+really little else than ill-temper too easily provoked. Not to
+justify or excuse such language, but to explain it, this
+consideration is urged. If not uniformly placable, Landor was
+always compassionate. He was tender-hearted rather than bloody-
+minded at all times, and upon only the most partial acquaintance
+with his writings could other opinion be formed. A completer
+knowledge of them would satisfy any one that he had as little real
+disposition to kill a king as to kill a mouse. In fact there is not
+a more marked peculiarity in his genius than the union with its
+strength of a most uncommon gentleness, and in the personal ways of
+the man this was equally manifest."--Vol. i. p. 496.
+
+
+Of his works, thus:
+
+
+"Though his mind was cast in the antique mould, it had opened itself
+to every kind of impression through a long and varied life; he has
+written with equal excellence in both poetry and prose, which can
+hardly be said of any of his contemporaries; and perhaps the single
+epithet by which his books would be best described is that reserved
+exclusively for books not characterised only by genius, but also by
+special individuality. They are unique. Having possessed them, we
+should miss them. Their place would be supplied by no others. They
+have that about them, moreover, which renders it almost certain that
+they will frequently be resorted to in future time. There are none
+in the language more quotable. Even where impulsiveness and want of
+patience have left them most fragmentary, this rich compensation is
+offered to the reader. There is hardly a conceivable subject, in
+life or literature, which they do not illustrate by striking
+aphorisms, by concise and profound observations, by wisdom ever
+applicable to the deeds of men, and by wit as available for their
+enjoyment. Nor, above all, will there anywhere be found a more
+pervading passion for liberty, a fiercer hatred of the base, a wider
+sympathy with the wronged and the oppressed, or help more ready at
+all times for those who fight at odds and disadvantage against the
+powerful and the fortunate, than in the writings of Walter Savage
+Landor."--Last page of second volume.
+
+
+The impression was strong upon the present writer's mind, as on Mr.
+Forster's, during years of close friendship with the subject of this
+biography, that his animosities were chiefly referable to the
+singular inability in him to dissociate other people's ways of
+thinking from his own. He had, to the last, a ludicrous grievance
+(both Mr. Forster and the writer have often amused themselves with
+it) against a good-natured nobleman, doubtless perfectly unconscious
+of having ever given him offence. The offence was, that on the
+occasion of some dinner party in another nobleman's house, many
+years before, this innocent lord (then a commoner) had passed in to
+dinner, through some door, before him, as he himself was about to
+pass in through that same door with a lady on his arm. Now, Landor
+was a gentleman of most scrupulous politeness, and in his carriage
+of himself towards ladies there was a certain mixture of stateliness
+and deference, belonging to quite another time, and, as Mr. Pepys
+would observe, "mighty pretty to see". If he could by any effort
+imagine himself committing such a high crime and misdemeanour as
+that in question, he could only imagine himself as doing it of a set
+purpose, under the sting of some vast injury, to inflict a great
+affront. A deliberately designed affront on the part of another
+man, it therefore remained to the end of his days. The manner in
+which, as time went on, he permeated the unfortunate lord's ancestry
+with this offence, was whimsically characteristic of Landor. The
+writer remembers very well when only the individual himself was held
+responsible in the story for the breach of good breeding; but in
+another ten years or so, it began to appear that his father had
+always been remarkable for ill manners; and in yet another ten years
+or so, his grandfather developed into quite a prodigy of coarse
+behaviour.
+
+Mr. Boythorn--if he may again be quoted--said of his adversary, Sir
+Leicester Dedlock: "That fellow is, AND HIS FATHER WAS, AND HIS
+GRANDFATHER WAS, the most stiff-necked, arrogant, imbecile, pig-
+headed numskull, ever, by some inexplicable mistake of Nature, born
+in any station of life but a walking-stick's!"
+
+The strength of some of Mr. Landor's most captivating kind qualities
+was traceable to the same source. Knowing how keenly he himself
+would feel the being at any small social disadvantage, or the being
+unconsciously placed in any ridiculous light, he was wonderfully
+considerate of shy people, or of such as might be below the level of
+his usual conversation, or otherwise out of their element. The
+writer once observed him in the keenest distress of mind in behalf
+of a modest young stranger who came into a drawing-room with a glove
+on his head. An expressive commentary on this sympathetic
+condition, and on the delicacy with which he advanced to the young
+stranger's rescue, was afterwards furnished by himself at a friendly
+dinner at Gore House, when it was the most delightful of houses.
+His dress--say, his cravat or shirt-collar--had become slightly
+disarranged on a hot evening, and Count D'Orsay laughingly called
+his attention to the circumstance as we rose from table. Landor
+became flushed, and greatly agitated: "My dear Count D'Orsay, I
+thank you! My dear Count D'Orsay, I thank you from my soul for
+pointing out to me the abominable condition to which I am reduced!
+If I had entered the Drawing-room, and presented myself before Lady
+Blessington in so absurd a light, I would have instantly gone home,
+put a pistol to my head, and blown my brains out!"
+
+Mr. Forster tells a similar story of his keeping a company waiting
+dinner, through losing his way; and of his seeing no remedy for that
+breach of politeness but cutting his throat, or drowning himself,
+unless a countryman whom he met could direct him by a short road to
+the house where the party were assembled. Surely these are
+expressive notes on the gravity and reality of his explosive
+inclinations to kill kings!
+
+His manner towards boys was charming, and the earnestness of his
+wish to be on equal terms with them and to win their confidence was
+quite touching. Few, reading Mr. Forster's book, can fall to see in
+this, his pensive remembrance of that "studious wilful boy at once
+shy and impetuous", who had not many intimacies at Rugby, but who
+was "generally popular and respected, and used his influence often
+to save the younger boys from undue harshness or violence". The
+impulsive yearnings of his passionate heart towards his own boy, on
+their meeting at Bath, after years of separation, likewise burn
+through this phase of his character.
+
+But a more spiritual, softened, and unselfish aspect of it, was to
+derived from his respectful belief in happiness which he himself had
+missed. His marriage had not been a felicitous one--it may be
+fairly assumed for either side--but no trace of bitterness or
+distrust concerning other marriages was in his mind. He was never
+more serene than in the midst of a domestic circle, and was
+invariably remarkable for a perfectly benignant interest in young
+couples and young lovers. That, in his ever-fresh fancy, he
+conceived in this association innumerable histories of himself
+involving far more unlikely events that never happened than Isaac
+D'Israeli ever imagined, is hardly to be doubted; but as to this
+part of his real history he was mute, or revealed his nobleness in
+an impulse to be generously just. We verge on delicate ground, but
+a slight remembrance rises in the writer which can grate nowhere.
+Mr. Forster relates how a certain friend, being in Florence, sent
+him home a leaf from the garden of his old house at Fiesole. That
+friend had first asked him what he should send him home, and he had
+stipulated for this gift--found by Mr. Forster among his papers
+after his death. The friend, on coming back to England, related to
+Landor that he had been much embarrassed, on going in search of the
+leaf, by his driver's suddenly stopping his horses in a narrow lane,
+and presenting him (the friend) to "La Signora Landora". The lady
+was walking alone on a bright Italian-winter-day; and the man,
+having been told to drive to the Villa Landora, inferred that he
+must be conveying a guest or visitor. "I pulled off my hat," said
+the friend, "apologised for the coachman's mistake, and drove on.
+The lady was walking with a rapid and firm step, had bright eyes, a
+fine fresh colour, and looked animated and agreeable." Landor
+checked off each clause of the description, with a stately nod of
+more than ready assent, and replied, with all his tremendous energy
+concentrated into the sentence: "And the Lord forbid that I should
+do otherwise than declare that she always WAS agreeable--to every
+one but ME!"
+
+Mr. Forster step by step builds up the evidence on which he writes
+this life and states this character. In like manner, he gives the
+evidence for his high estimation of Landor's works, and--it may be
+added--for their recompense against some neglect, in finding so
+sympathetic, acute, and devoted a champion. Nothing in the book is
+more remarkable than his examination of each of Landor's successive
+pieces of writing, his delicate discernment of their beauties, and
+his strong desire to impart his own perceptions in this wise to the
+great audience that is yet to come. It rarely befalls an author to
+have such a commentator: to become the subject of so much artistic
+skill and knowledge, combined with such infinite and loving pains.
+Alike as a piece of Biography, and as a commentary upon the beauties
+of a great writer, the book is a massive book; as the man and the
+writer were massive too. Sometimes, when the balance held by Mr.
+Forster has seemed for a moment to turn a little heavily against the
+infirmities of temperament of a grand old friend, we have felt
+something of a shock; but we have not once been able to gainsay the
+justice of the scales. This feeling, too, has only fluttered out of
+the detail, here or there, and has vanished before the whole. We
+fully agree with Mr. Forster that "judgment has been passed"--as it
+should be--"with an equal desire to be only just on all the
+qualities of his temperament which affected necessarily not his own
+life only. But, now that the story is told, no one will have
+difficulty in striking the balance between its good and ill; and
+what was really imperishable in Landor's genius will not be
+treasured less, or less understood, for the more perfect knowledge
+of his character".
+
+Mr. Forster's second volume gives a facsimile of Landor's writing at
+seventy-five. It may be interesting to those who are curious in
+calligraphy, to know that its resemblance to the recent handwriting
+of that great genius, M. Victor Hugo, is singularly strong.
+
+In a military burial-ground in India, the name of Walter Landor is
+associated with the present writer's over the grave of a young
+officer. No name could stand there, more inseparably associated in
+the writer's mind with the dignity of generosity: with a noble
+scorn of all littleness, all cruelty, oppression, fraud, and false
+pretence.
+
+
+
+ADDRESS WHICH APPEARED SHORTLY PREVIOUS TO THE COMPLETION OF THE
+TWENTIETH VOLUME (1868), INTIMATING A NEW SERIES OF "ALL THE YEAR
+ROUND"
+
+
+
+I beg to announce to the readers of this Journal, that on the
+completion of the Twentieth Volume on the Twenty-eighth of November,
+in the present year, I shall commence an entirely New Series of All
+the Year Round. The change is not only due to the convenience of
+the public (with which a set of such books, extending beyond twenty
+large volumes, would be quite incompatible), but is also resolved
+upon for the purpose of effecting some desirable improvements in
+respect of type, paper, and size of page, which could not otherwise
+be made. To the Literature of the New Series it would not become me
+to refer, beyond glancing at the pages of this Journal, and of its
+predecessor, through a score of years; inasmuch as my regular
+fellow-labourers and I will be at our old posts, in company with
+those younger comrades, whom I have had the pleasure of enrolling
+from time to time, and whose number it is always one of my
+pleasantest editorial duties to enlarge.
+
+As it is better that every kind of work honestly undertaken and
+discharged, should speak for itself than be spoken for, I will only
+remark further on one intended omission in the New Series. The
+Extra Christmas Number has now been so extensively, and regularly,
+and often imitated, that it is in very great danger of becoming
+tiresome. I have therefore resolved (though I cannot add,
+willingly) to abolish it, at the highest tide of its success.
+
+CHARLES DICKENS.
+
+
+
+Footnotes:
+
+{1} Walter Savage Landor: a Biography, by John Forster, 2 vols.
+Chapman and Hall.
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg Etext of Contributions to: All The Year Round
+
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