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authorRoger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org>2025-10-15 05:16:53 -0700
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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Annals of the Parish, by John Galt,
+Illustrated by Henry W. Kerr
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
+other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
+whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
+the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
+www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
+to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
+
+
+
+
+Title: Annals of the Parish
+
+
+Author: John Galt
+
+
+
+Release Date: May 13, 2015 [eBook #1310]
+[This file was first posted in April 18, 1998]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: UTF-8
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ANNALS OF THE PARISH***
+
+
+Transcribed from the 1910 T. N. Foulis edition by David Price, email
+ccx074@pglaf.org
+
+ [Picture: Book cover]
+
+ [Picture: The Loupin’-on Stane]
+
+
+
+
+
+ ANNALS OF
+ THE PARISH
+
+
+ OR THE CHRONICLE OF DAL-
+ MAILING DURING THE MINISTRY
+ OF THE REV. MICAH BALWHID-
+ DER. WRITTEN BY HIMSELF
+ AND ARRANGED AND EDITED BY
+ JOHN GALT
+ ILLUSTRATED IN COLOUR BY
+ HENRY W. KERR, R.S.A.
+
+ [Picture: Decorative graphic]
+
+ T.N.FOULIS
+ London & Edinburgh
+ 1 9 1 0
+
+ * * * * *
+
+ _September_ 1910
+
+ * * * * *
+
+ _Printed by Turnbull & Spears_, _Edinburgh_
+
+
+
+
+INTRODUCTION
+
+
+IN the same year, and on the same day of the same month, that his Sacred
+Majesty King George, the third of the name, came to his crown and
+kingdom, I was placed and settled as the minister of Dalmailing. {1}
+When about a week thereafter this was known in the parish, it was thought
+a wonderful thing, and everybody spoke of me and the new king as united
+in our trusts and temporalities, marvelling how the same should come to
+pass, and thinking the hand of Providence was in it, and that surely we
+were preordained to fade and flourish in fellowship together; which has
+really been the case: for in the same season that his Most Excellent
+Majesty, as he was very properly styled in the proclamations for the
+general fasts and thanksgivings, was set by as a precious vessel which
+had received a crack or a flaw, and could only be serviceable in the way
+of an ornament, I was obliged, by reason of age and the growing
+infirmities of my recollection, to consent to the earnest entreaties of
+the Session, and to accept of Mr. Amos to be my helper. I was long
+reluctant to do so; but the great respect that my people had for me, and
+the love that I bore towards them, over and above the sign that was given
+to me in the removal of the royal candle-stick from its place, worked
+upon my heart and understanding, and I could not stand out. So, on the
+last Sabbath of the year 1810, I preached my last sermon, and it was a
+moving discourse. There were few dry eyes in the kirk that day; for I
+had been with the aged from the beginning—the young considered me as
+their natural pastor—and my bidding them all farewell was, as when of old
+among the heathen, an idol was taken away by the hands of the enemy.
+
+At the close of the worship, and before the blessing, I addressed them in
+a fatherly manner; and, although the kirk was fuller than ever I saw it
+before, the fall of a pin might have been heard—at the conclusion there
+was a sobbing and much sorrow. I said,
+
+“My dear friends, I have now finished my work among you for ever. I have
+often spoken to you from this place the words of truth and holiness; and,
+had it been in poor frail human nature to practise the advice and
+counselling that I have given in this pulpit to you, there would not need
+to be any cause for sorrow on this occasion—the close and latter end of
+my ministry. But, nevertheless, I have no reason to complain; and it
+will be my duty to testify, in that place where I hope we are all one day
+to meet again, that I found you a docile and a tractable flock, far more
+than at first I could have expected. There are among you still a few,
+but with grey heads and feeble hands now, that can remember the great
+opposition that was made to my placing, and the stout part they
+themselves took in the burly, because I was appointed by the patron; but
+they have lived to see the error of their way, and to know that preaching
+is the smallest portion of the duties of a faithful minister. I may not,
+my dear friends, have applied my talent in the pulpit so effectually as
+perhaps I might have done, considering the gifts that it pleased God to
+give me in that way, and the education that I had in the Orthodox
+University of Glasgow, as it was in the time of my youth; nor can I say
+that, in the works of peace-making and charity, I have done all that I
+should have done. But I have done my best, studying no interest but the
+good that was to rise according to the faith in Christ Jesus.
+
+“To my young friends I would, as a parting word, say, look to the lives
+and conversation of your parents—they were plain, honest, and devout
+Christians, fearing God and honouring the King. They believed the Bible
+was the word of God; and, when they practised its precepts, they found,
+by the good that came from them, that it was truly so. They bore in mind
+the tribulation and persecution of their forefathers for righteousness’
+sake, and were thankful for the quiet and protection of the government in
+their day and generation. Their land was tilled with industry, and they
+ate the bread of carefulness with a contented spirit, and, verily, they
+had the reward of well-doing even in this world; for they beheld on all
+sides the blessing of God upon the nation, and the tree growing, and the
+plough going where the banner of the oppressor was planted of old, and
+the war-horse trampled in the blood of martyrs. Reflect on this, my
+young friends, and know, that the best part of a Christian’s duty in this
+world of much evil, is to thole and suffer with resignation, as lang as
+it is possible for human nature to do. I do not counsel passive
+obedience: that is a doctrine that the Church of Scotland can never
+abide; but the divine right of resistance, which, in the days of her
+trouble, she so bravely asserted against popish and prelatic usurpations,
+was never resorted to till the attempt was made to remove the ark of the
+tabernacle from her. I therefore counsel you, my young friends, not to
+lend your ears to those that trumpet forth their hypothetical politics;
+but to believe that the laws of the land are administered with a good
+intent, till in your own homes and dwellings ye feel the presence of the
+oppressor—then, and not till then, are ye free to gird your loins for
+battle—and woe to him, and woe to the land where that is come to, if the
+sword be sheathed till the wrong be redressed.
+
+“As for you, my old companions, many changes have we seen in our day; but
+the change that we ourselves are soon to undergo will be the greatest of
+all. We have seen our bairns grow to manhood—we have seen the beauty of
+youth pass away—we have felt our backs become unable for the burthen, and
+our right hand forget its cunning.—Our eyes have become dim, and our
+heads grey—we are now tottering with short and feckless steps towards the
+grave; and some, that should have been here this day, are bed-rid, lying,
+as it were, at the gates of death, like Lazarus at the threshold of the
+rich man’s door, full of ails and sores, and having no enjoyment but in
+the hope that is in hereafter. What can I say to you but farewell! Our
+work is done—we are weary and worn out, and in need of rest—may the rest
+of the blessed be our portion!—and in the sleep that all must sleep,
+beneath the cold blanket of the kirkyard grass, and on that clay pillow
+where we must shortly lay our heads, may we have pleasant dreams, till we
+are awakened to partake of the everlasting banquet of the saints in
+glory!”
+
+When I had finished, there was for some time a great solemnity throughout
+the kirk; and, before giving the blessing, I sat down to compose myself,
+for my heart was big, and my spirit oppressed with sadness.
+
+As I left the pulpit, all the elders stood on the steps to hand me down,
+and the tear was in every eye, and they helped me into the session-house;
+but I could not speak to them, nor them to me. Then Mr. Dalziel, who was
+always a composed and sedate man, said a few words of prayer, and I was
+comforted therewith, and rose to go home to the manse; but in the
+churchyard all the congregation was assembled, young and old, and they
+made a lane for me to the back-yett that opened into the
+manse-garden—Some of them put out their hands and touched me as I passed,
+followed by the elders, and some of them wept. It was as if I was
+passing away, and to be no more—verily, it was the reward of my
+ministry—a faithful account of which, year by year, I now sit down, in
+the evening of my days, to make up, to the end that I may bear witness to
+the work of a beneficent Providence, even in the narrow sphere of my
+parish, and the concerns of that flock of which it was His most gracious
+pleasure to make me the unworthy shepherd.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I
+YEAR 1760
+
+
+THE Anno Domini one thousand seven hundred and sixty, was remarkable for
+three things in the parish of Dalmailing.—First and foremost, there was
+my placing; then the coming of Mrs. Malcolm with her five children to
+settle among us; and next, my marriage upon my own cousin, Miss Betty
+Lanshaw, by which the account of this year naturally divides itself into
+three heads or portions.
+
+First, of the placing.—It was a great affair; for I was put in by the
+patron, and the people knew nothing whatsoever of me, and their hearts
+were stirred into strife on the occasion, and they did all that lay
+within the compass of their power to keep me out, insomuch, that there
+was obliged to be a guard of soldiers to protect the presbytery; and it
+was a thing that made my heart grieve when I heard the drum beating and
+the fife playing as we were going to the kirk. The people were really
+mad and vicious, and flung dirt upon us as we passed, and reviled us all,
+and held out the finger of scorn at me; but I endured it with a resigned
+spirit, compassionating their wilfulness and blindness. Poor old Mr.
+Kilfuddy of the Braehill got such a clash of glar on the side of his
+face, that his eye was almost extinguished.
+
+When we got to the kirk door, it was found to be nailed up, so as by no
+possibility to be opened. The sergeant of the soldiers wanted to break
+it, but I was afraid that the heritors would grudge and complain of the
+expense of a new door, and I supplicated him to let it be as it was: we
+were, therefore, obligated to go in by a window, and the crowd followed
+us in the most unreverent manner, making the Lord’s house like an inn on
+a fair day, with their grievous yellyhooing. During the time of the
+psalm and the sermon, they behaved themselves better, but when the
+induction came on, their clamour was dreadful; and Thomas Thorl, the
+weaver, a pious zealot in that time, he got up and protested, and said,
+“Verily, verily, I say unto you, he that entereth not by the door into
+the sheepfold, but climbeth up some other way, the same is a thief and a
+robber.” And I thought I would have a hard and sore time of it with such
+an outstrapolous people. Mr. Given, that was then the minister of
+Lugton, was a jocose man, and would have his joke even at a solemnity.
+When the laying of the hands upon me was adoing, he could not get near
+enough to put on his, but he stretched out his staff and touched my head,
+and said, to the great diversion of the rest, “This will do well enough,
+timber to timber;” but it was an unfriendly saying of Mr. Given,
+considering the time and the place, and the temper of my people.
+
+ [Picture: The Souter]
+
+After the ceremony, we then got out at the window, and it was a heavy day
+to me; but we went to the manse, and there we had an excellent dinner,
+which Mrs. Watts of the new inns of Irville {9} prepared at my request,
+and sent her chaise-driver to serve, for he was likewise her waiter, she
+having then but one chaise, and that no often called for.
+
+But, although my people received me in this unruly manner, I was resolved
+to cultivate civility among them, and therefore, the very next morning I
+began a round of visitations; but, oh! it was a steep brae that I had to
+climb, and it needed a stout heart. For I found the doors in some places
+barred against me; in others, the bairns, when they saw me coming, ran
+crying to their mothers, “Here’s the feckless Mess-John!” and then, when
+I went into the houses, their parents wouldna ask me to sit down, but
+with a scornful way, said, “Honest man, what’s your pleasure here?”
+Nevertheless, I walked about from door to door like a dejected beggar,
+till I got the almous deed of a civil reception—and who would have
+thought it?—from no less a person than the same Thomas Thorl that was so
+bitter against me in the kirk on the foregoing day.
+
+Thomas was standing at the door with his green duffle apron, and his red
+Kilmarnock nightcap—I mind him as well as if it was but yesterday—and he
+had seen me going from house to house, and in what manner I was rejected,
+and his bowels were moved, and he said to me in a kind manner, “Come in,
+sir, and ease yoursel’: this will never do, the clergy are God’s gorbies,
+and for their Master’s sake it behoves us to respect them. There was no
+ane in the whole parish mair against you than mysel’; but this early
+visitation is a symptom of grace that I couldna have expectit from a bird
+out the nest of patronage.” I thanked Thomas, and went in with him, and
+we had some solid conversation together, and I told him that it was not
+so much the pastor’s duty to feed the flock, as to herd them well; and
+that, although there might be some abler with the head than me, there
+wasna a he within the bounds of Scotland more willing to watch the fold
+by night and by day. And Thomas said he had not heard a mair sound
+observe for some time, and that, if I held to that doctrine in the
+poopit, it wouldna be lang till I would work a change.—“I was mindit,”
+quoth he, “never to set my foot within the kirk door while you were
+there; but to testify, and no to condemn without a trial, I’ll be there
+next Lord’s day, and egg my neighbours to be likewise, so ye’ll no have
+to preach just to the bare walls and the laird’s family.”
+
+I have now to speak of the coming of Mrs. Malcolm.—She was the widow of a
+Clyde shipmaster, that was lost at sea with his vessel. She was a genty
+body, calm and methodical. From morning to night she sat at her wheel,
+spinning the finest lint, which suited well with her pale hands. She
+never changed her widow’s weeds, and she was aye as if she had just been
+ta’en out of a bandbox. The tear was aften in her e’e when the bairns
+were at the school; but when they came home, her spirit was lighted up
+with gladness, although, poor woman, she had many a time very little to
+give them. They were, however, wonderful well-bred things, and took with
+thankfulness whatever she set before them; for they knew that their
+father, the breadwinner, was away, and that she had to work sore for
+their bit and drap. I dare say, the only vexation that ever she had from
+any of them, on their own account, was when Charlie, the eldest laddie,
+had won fourpence at pitch-and-toss at the school, which he brought home
+with a proud heart to his mother. I happened to be daunrin’ by at the
+time, and just looked in at the door to say gude-night: it was a sad
+sight. There was she sitting with the silent tear on her cheek, and
+Charlie greeting as if he had done a great fault, and the other four
+looking on with sorrowful faces. Never, I am sure, did Charlie Malcolm
+gamble after that night.
+
+I often wondered what brought Mrs. Malcolm to our clachan, instead of
+going to a populous town, where she might have taken up a huxtry-shop, as
+she was but of a silly constitution, the which would have been better for
+her than spinning from morning to far in the night, as if she was in
+verity drawing the thread of life. But it was, no doubt, from an honest
+pride to hide her poverty; for when her daughter Effie was ill with the
+measles—the poor lassie was very ill—nobody thought she could come
+through, and when she did get the turn, she was for many a day a heavy
+handful;—our session being rich, and nobody on it but cripple Tammy
+Daidles, that was at that time known through all the country side for
+begging on a horse, I thought it my duty to call upon Mrs. Malcolm in a
+sympathising way, and offer her some assistance, but she refused it.
+
+“No, sir,” said she, “I canna take help from the poor’s-box, although
+it’s very true that I am in great need; for it might hereafter be cast up
+to my bairns, whom it may please God to restore to better circumstances
+when I am no to see’t; but I would fain borrow five pounds, and if, sir,
+you will write to Mr. Maitland, that is now the Lord Provost of Glasgow,
+and tell him that Marion Shaw would be obliged to him for the lend of
+that soom, I think he will not fail to send it.”
+
+I wrote the letter that night to Provost Maitland, and, by the retour of
+the post, I got an answer, with twenty pounds for Mrs. Malcolm, saying,
+“That it was with sorrow he heard so small a trifle could be
+serviceable.” When I took the letter and the money, which was in a
+bank-bill, she said, “This is just like himsel’.” She then told me that
+Mr. Maitland had been a gentleman’s son of the east country, but driven
+out of his father’s house, when a laddie, by his stepmother; and that he
+had served as a servant lad with her father, who was the Laird of
+Yillcogie, but ran through his estate, and left her, his only daughter,
+in little better than beggary with her auntie, the mother of Captain
+Malcolm, her husband that was. Provost Maitland in his servitude had
+ta’en a notion of her; and when he recovered his patrimony, and had
+become a great Glasgow merchant, on hearing how she was left by her
+father, he offered to marry her, but she had promised herself to her
+cousin the captain, whose widow she was. He then married a rich lady,
+and in time grew, as he was, Lord Provost of the city; but his letter
+with the twenty pounds to me, showed that he had not forgotten his first
+love. It was a short, but a well-written letter, in a fair hand of
+write, containing much of the true gentleman; and Mrs. Malcolm said, “Who
+knows but out of the regard he once had for their mother, he may do
+something for my five helpless orphans.”
+
+Thirdly, Upon the subject of taking my cousin, Miss Betty Lanshaw, for my
+first wife, I have little to say.—It was more out of a compassionate
+habitual affection, than the passion of love. We were brought up by our
+grandmother in the same house, and it was a thing spoken of from the
+beginning, that Betty and me were to be married. So, when she heard that
+the Laird of Breadland had given me the presentation of Dalmailing, she
+began to prepare for the wedding; and as soon as the placing was well
+over, and the manse in order, I gaed to Ayr, where she was, and we were
+quietly married, and came home in a chaise, bringing with us her little
+brother Andrew, that died in the East Indies, and he lived and was
+brought up by us.
+
+Now, this is all, I think, that happened in that year worthy of being
+mentioned, except that at the sacrament, when old Mr. Kilfuddy was
+preaching in the tent, it came on such a thunder-plump, that there was
+not a single soul stayed in the kirkyard to hear him; for the which he
+was greatly mortified, and never after came to our preachings.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II
+YEAR 1761
+
+
+IT was in this year that the great smuggling trade corrupted all the west
+coast, especially the laigh lands about the Troon and the Loans. The tea
+was going like the chaff, the brandy like well-water, and the wastrie of
+all things was terrible. There was nothing minded but the riding of
+cadgers by day, and excisemen by night—and battles between the smugglers
+and the king’s men, both by sea and land. There was a continual
+drunkenness and debauchery; and our session, that was but on the lip of
+this whirlpool of iniquity, had an awful time o’t. I did all that was in
+the power of nature to keep my people from the contagion: I preached
+sixteen times from the text, “Render to Cæsar the things that are
+Cæsar’s.” I visited, and I exhorted; I warned, and I prophesied; I told
+them that, although the money came in like sclate stones, it would go
+like the snow off the dyke. But for all I could do, the evil got in
+among us, and we had no less than three contested bastard bairns upon our
+hands at one time, which was a thing never heard of in a parish of the
+shire of Ayr since the Reformation. Two of the bairns, after no small
+sifting and searching, we got fathered at last; but the third, that was
+by Meg Glaiks, and given to one Rab Rickerton, was utterly refused,
+though the fact was not denied; but he was a termagant fellow, and
+snappit his fingers at the elders. The next day he listed in the Scotch
+Greys, who were then quartered at Ayr, and we never heard more of him,
+but thought he had been slain in battle, till one of the parish, about
+three years since, went up to London to lift a legacy from a cousin that
+died among the Hindoos. When he was walking about, seeing the
+curiosities, and among others Chelsea Hospital, he happened to speak to
+some of the invalids, who found out from his tongue that he was a
+Scotchman; and speaking to the invalids, one of them, a very old man,
+with a grey head and a leg of timber, inquired what part of Scotland he
+was come from; and when he mentioned my parish, the invalid gave a great
+shout, and said he was from the same place himself; and who should this
+old man be, but the very identical Rab Rickerton, that was art and part
+in Meg Glaiks’ disowned bairn. Then they had a long converse together,
+and he had come through many hardships, but had turned out a good
+soldier; and so, in his old days, was an indoor pensioner, and very
+comfortable; and he said that he had, to be sure, spent his youth in the
+devil’s service, and his manhood in the king’s, but his old age was given
+to that of his Maker, which I was blithe and thankful to hear; and he
+enquired about many a one in the parish, the blooming and the green of
+his time, but they were all dead and buried; and he had a contrite and
+penitent spirit, and read his Bible every day, delighting most in the
+Book of Joshua, the Chronicles, and the Kings.
+
+Before this year, the drinking of tea was little known in the parish,
+saving among a few of the heritors’ houses on a Sabbath evening; but now
+it became very rife: yet the commoner sort did not like to let it be
+known that they were taking to the new luxury, especially the elderly
+women, who, for that reason, had their ploys in out-houses and by-places,
+just as the witches lang syne had their sinful possets and
+galravitchings; and they made their tea for common in the pint-stoup, and
+drank it out of caps and luggies, for there were but few among them that
+had cups and saucers. Well do I remember one night in harvest, in this
+very year, as I was taking my twilight dauner aneath the hedge along the
+back side of Thomas Thorl’s yard, meditating on the goodness of
+Providence, and looking at the sheaves of victual on the field, that I
+heard his wife, and two three other carlins, with their Bohea in the
+inside of the hedge, and no doubt but it had a lacing of the conek, {17}
+for they were all cracking like pen-guns. But I gave them a sign, by a
+loud host, that Providence sees all, and it skailed the bike; for I heard
+them, like guilty creatures, whispering, and gathering up their
+truck-pots and trenchers, and cowering away home.
+
+It was in this year that Patrick Dilworth (he had been schoolmaster of
+the parish from the time, as his wife said, of Anna Regina, and before
+the Rexes came to the crown), was disabled by a paralytic, and the
+heritors, grudging the cost of another schoolmaster as long as he lived,
+would not allow the session to get his place supplied, which was a wrong
+thing, I must say, of them; for the children of the parishioners were
+obliged, therefore, to go to the neighbouring towns for their schooling,
+and the custom was to take a piece of bread and cheese in their pockets
+for dinner, and to return in the evening always voracious for more, the
+long walk helping the natural crave of their young appetites. In this
+way Mrs. Malcolm’s two eldest laddies, Charlie and Robert, were wont to
+go to Irville, and it was soon seen that they kept themselves aloof from
+the other callans in the clachan, and had a genteeler turn than the
+grulshy bairns of the cottars. Her bit lassies, Kate and Effie, were
+better off; for some years before, Nanse Banks had taken up a teaching in
+a garret-room of a house, at the corner where John Bayne has biggit the
+sclate-house for his grocery-shop. Nanse learnt them reading and working
+stockings, and how to sew the semplar, for twal-pennies a-week. She was
+a patient creature, well cut out for her calling, with blear een, a pale
+face, and a long neck, but meek and contented withal, tholing the dule of
+this world with a Christian submission of the spirit; and her garret-room
+was a cordial of cleanliness, for she made the scholars set the house in
+order, time and time about, every morning; and it was a common remark for
+many a day, that the lassies, who had been at Nanse Banks’s school, were
+always well spoken of, both for their civility, and the trigness of their
+houses when they were afterwards married. In short, I do not know, that
+in all the long epoch of my ministry, any individual body did more to
+improve the ways of the parishioners, in their domestic concerns, than
+did that worthy and innocent creature, Nanse Banks, the schoolmistress;
+and she was a great loss when she was removed, as it is to be hoped, to a
+better world; but anent this I shall have to speak more at large
+hereafter.
+
+It was in this year that my patron, the Laird of Breadland, departed this
+life, and I preached his funeral sermon; but he was non-beloved in the
+parish; for my people never forgave him for putting me upon them,
+although they began to be more on a familiar footing with myself. This
+was partly owing to my first wife, Betty Lanshaw, who was an active
+throughgoing woman, and wonderfu’ useful to many of the cottars’ wives at
+their lying-in; and when a death happened among them, her helping hand,
+and any thing we had at the manse, was never wanting; and I went about
+myself to the bedsides of the frail, leaving no stone unturned to win the
+affections of my people, which, by the blessing of the Lord, in process
+of time, was brought to a bearing.
+
+But a thing happened in this year, which deserves to be recorded, as
+manifesting what effect the smuggling was beginning to take in the morals
+of the country side. One Mr. Macskipnish, of Highland parentage, who had
+been a valet-de-chambre with a major in the campaigns, and taken a
+prisoner with him by the French, he having come home in a cartel, took up
+a dancing-school at Irville, the which art he had learnt in the
+genteelest fashion, in the mode of Paris, at the French court. Such a
+thing as a dancing-school had never, in the memory of man, been known in
+our country side; and there was such a sound about the steps and
+cottillions of Mr. Macskipnish, that every lad and lass, that could spare
+time and siller, went to him, to the great neglect of their work. The
+very bairns on the loan, instead of their wonted play, gaed linking and
+louping in the steps of Mr. Macskipnish, who was, to be sure, a great
+curiosity, with long spindle legs, his breast shot out like a duck’s, and
+his head powdered and frizzled up like a tappit-hen. He was, indeed, the
+proudest peacock that could be seen, and he had a ring on his finger, and
+when he came to drink his tea at the Breadland, he brought no hat on his
+head, but a droll cockit thing under his arm, which, he said, was after
+the manner of the courtiers at the petty suppers of one Madam Pompadour,
+who was at that time the concubine of the French king.
+
+I do not recollect any other remarkable thing that happened in this year.
+The harvest was very abundant, and the meal so cheap, that it caused a
+great defect in my stipend; so that I was obligated to postpone the
+purchase of a mahogany scrutoire for my study, as I had intended. But I
+had not the heart to complain of this: on the contrary, I rejoiced
+thereat; for what made me want my scrutoire till another year, had
+carried blitheness into the hearth of the cottar, and made the widow’s
+heart sing with joy; and I would have been an unnatural creature, had I
+not joined in the universal gladness, because plenty did abound.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III
+YEAR 1762
+
+
+THE third year of my ministry was long held in remembrance for several
+very memorable things. William Byres of the Loanhead had a cow that
+calved two calves at one calving; Mrs. Byres, the same year, had twins,
+male and female; and there was such a crop on his fields, testifying that
+the Lord never sends a mouth into the world without providing meat for
+it. But what was thought a very daunting sign of something, happened on
+the Sacrament Sabbath at the conclusion of the action sermon, when I had
+made a very suitable discourse. The day was tempestuous, and the wind
+blew with such a pith and birr, that I thought it would have twirled the
+trees in the kirkyard out by the roots, and, blowing in this manner, it
+tirled the thack from the rigging of the manse stable; and the same blast
+that did that, took down the lead that was on the kirk-roof, which hurled
+off, as I was saying, at the conclusion of the action sermon, with such a
+dreadful sound, as the like was never heard, and all the congregation
+thought that it betokened a mutation to me. However, nothing particular
+happened to me; but the smallpox came in among the weans of the parish,
+and the smashing that it made of the poor bits o’ bairns was indeed
+woeful.
+
+One Sabbath, when the pestilence was raging, I preached a sermon about
+Rachel weeping for her children, which Thomas Thorl, who was surely a
+great judge of good preaching, said, “was a monument of divinity whilk
+searched the heart of many a parent that day;” a thing I was well pleased
+to hear, for Thomas, as I have related at length, was the most zealous
+champion against my getting the parish; but, from this time, I set him
+down in my mind for the next vacancy among the elders. Worthy man! it
+was not permitted him to arrive at that honour. In the fall of that year
+he took an income in his legs, and couldna go about, and was laid up for
+the remainder of his days, a perfect Lazarus, by the fire-side. But he
+was well supported in his affliction. In due season, when it pleased Him
+that alone can give and take, to pluck him from this life, as the fruit
+ripened and ready for the gathering, his death, to all that knew him, was
+a gentle dispensation, for truly he had been in sore trouble.
+
+It was in this year that Charlie Malcolm, Mrs. Malcolm’s eldest son, was
+sent to be a cabin-boy in the Tobacco trader, a three-masted ship, that
+sailed between Port-Glasgow and Virginia in America. She was commanded
+by Captain Dickie, an Irville man; for at that time the Clyde was
+supplied with the best sailors from our coast, the coal-trade with
+Ireland being a better trade for bringing up good mariners than the long
+voyages in the open sea; which was the reason, as I often heard said, why
+the Clyde shipping got so many of their men from our country side. The
+going to sea of Charlie Malcolm was, on divers accounts, a very
+remarkable thing to us all; for he was the first that ever went from our
+parish, in the memory of man, to be a sailor, and everybody was concerned
+at it, and some thought it was a great venture of his mother to let him,
+his father having been lost at sea. But what could the forlorn widow do?
+She had five weans, and little to give them; and, as she herself said, he
+was aye in the hand of his Maker, go where he might; and the will of God
+would be done, in spite of all earthly wiles and devices to the contrary.
+
+ [Picture: Preparing for the Kirk]
+
+On the Monday morning, when Charlie was to go away to meet the Irville
+carrier on the road, we were all up, and I walked by myself from the
+manse into the clachan to bid him farewell, and I met him just coming
+from his mother’s door, as blithe as a bee, in his sailor’s dress, with a
+stick, and a bundle tied in a Barcelona silk handkerchief hanging o’er
+his shoulder, and his two little brothers were with him, and his sisters,
+Kate and Effie, looking out from the door all begreeten; but his mother
+was in the house, praying to the Lord to protect her orphan, as she
+afterwards told me. All the weans of the clachan were gathered at the
+kirkyard yett to see him pass, and they gave him three great shouts as he
+was going by; and everybody was at their doors, and said something
+encouraging to him; but there was a great laugh when auld Mizy Spaewell
+came hirpling with her bauchle in her hand, and flung it after him for
+good-luck. Mizy had a wonderful faith in freats, and was just an oracle
+of sagacity at expounding dreams, and bodes of every sort and
+description—besides, she was reckoned one of the best howdies in her day;
+but by this time she was grown frail and feckless, and she died the same
+year on Hallowe’en, which made everybody wonder that it should have so
+fallen out for her to die on Hallowe’en.
+
+Shortly after the departure of Charlie Malcolm, the Lady of Breadland,
+with her three daughters, removed to Edinburgh, where the young laird,
+that had been my pupil, was learning to be an advocate, and the
+Breadland-house was set to Major Gilchrist, a nabob from India; but he
+was a narrow ailing man, and his maiden-sister, Miss Girzie, was the
+scrimpetest creature that could be; so that, in their hands, all the
+pretty policy of the Breadlands, that had cost a power of money to the
+old laird that was my patron, fell into decay and disorder; and the bonny
+yew-trees that were cut into the shape of peacocks, soon grew out of all
+shape, and are now doleful monuments of the major’s tack, and that of
+Lady Skimmilk, as Miss Girzie Gilchrist, his sister, was nick-named by
+every ane that kent her.
+
+But it was not so much on account of the neglect of the Breadland, that
+the incoming of Major Gilchrist was to be deplored. The old men that had
+a light labour in keeping the policy in order, were thrown out of bread,
+and could do little; and the poor women that whiles got a bit and a drap
+from the kitchen of the family, soon felt the change, so that by little
+and little we were obligated to give help from the session; insomuch
+that, before the end of the year, I was necessitated to preach a
+discourse on almsgiving, specially for the benefit of our own poor, a
+thing never before known in the parish.
+
+But one good thing came from the Gilchrists to Mrs. Malcolm. Miss
+Girzie, whom they called Lady Skimmilk, had been in a very penurious way
+as a seamstress, in the Gorbals of Glasgow, while her brother was making
+the fortune in India, and she was a clever needle-woman—none better, as
+it was said; and she, having some things to make, took Kate Malcolm to
+help her in the coarse work; and Kate, being a nimble and birky thing,
+was so useful to the lady, and the complaining man the major, that they
+invited her to stay with them at the Breadland for the winter, where,
+although she was holden to her seam from morning to night, her food
+lightened the hand of her mother, who, for the first time since her
+coming into the parish, found the penny for the day’s darg more than was
+needed for the meal-basin; and the tea-drinking was beginning to spread
+more openly, insomuch that, by the advice of the first Mrs. Balwhidder,
+Mrs. Malcolm took in tea to sell, and in this way was enabled to eke
+something to the small profits of her wheel. Thus the tide that had been
+so long ebbing to her, began to turn; and here I am bound in truth to
+say, that although I never could abide the smuggling, both on its own
+account, and the evils that grew therefrom to the country side, I lost
+some of my dislike to the tea after Mrs. Malcolm began to traffic in it,
+and we then had it for our breakfast in the morning at the manse, as well
+as in the afternoon. But what I thought most of it for was, that it did
+no harm to the head of the drinkers, which was not always the case with
+the possets that were in fashion before. There is no meeting now in the
+summer evenings, as I remember often happened in my younger days, with
+decent ladies coming home with red faces, tosy and cosh, from a
+posset-masking; so, both for its temperance and on account of Mrs.
+Malcolm’s sale, I refrained from the November in this year to preach
+against tea; but I never lifted the weight of my displeasure from off the
+smuggling trade, until it was utterly put down by the strong hand of
+government.
+
+There was no other thing of note in this year, saving only that I planted
+in the garden the big pear-tree, which had the two great branches that we
+call the Adam and Eve. I got the plant, then a sapling, from Mr. Graft,
+that was Lord Eaglesham’s head-gardener; and he said it was, as indeed
+all the parish now knows well, a most juicy sweet pear, such as was not
+known in Scotland till my lord brought down the father plant from the
+king’s garden in London, in the forty-five when he went up to testify his
+loyalty to the House of Hanover.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV
+YEAR 1763
+
+
+THE An. Dom. 1763, was, in many a respect, a memorable year, both in
+public and in private. The King granted peace to the French, and Charlie
+Malcolm, that went to sea in the Tobacco trader, came home to see his
+mother. The ship, after being at America, had gone down to Jamaica, an
+island in the West Indies, with a cargo of live lumber, as Charlie told
+me himself, and had come home with more than a hundred and fifty hoggits
+of sugar, and sixty-three puncheons full of rum; for she was, by all
+accounts, a stately galley, and almost two hundred tons in the burthen,
+being the largest vessel then sailing from the creditable town of
+Port-Glasgow. Charlie was not expected; and his coming was a great thing
+to us all, so I will mention the whole particulars.
+
+One evening, towards the gloaming, as I was taking my walk of meditation,
+I saw a brisk sailor laddie coming towards me. He had a pretty green
+parrot sitting on a bundle, tied in a Barcelona silk handkerchief, which
+he carried with a stick over his shoulder, and in this bundle was a
+wonderful big nut, such as no one in our parish had ever seen. It was
+called a cocker-nut. This blithe callant was Charlie Malcolm, who had
+come all the way that day his leeful lane, on his own legs from Greenock,
+where the Tobacco trader was then ’livering her cargo. I told him how
+his mother, and his brothers, and his sisters were all in good health,
+and went to convoy him home; and as we were going along, he told me many
+curious things, and he gave me six beautiful yellow limes, that he had
+brought in his pouch all the way across the seas, for me to make a bowl
+of punch with, and I thought more of them than if they had been golden
+guineas, it was so mindful of the laddie.
+
+When we got to the door of his mother’s house, she was sitting at the
+fireside, with her three other bairns at their bread and milk, Kate being
+then with Lady Skimmilk, at the Breadland, sewing. It was between the
+day and dark, when the shuttle stands still till the lamp is lighted.
+But such a shout of joy and thankfulness as rose from that hearth, when
+Charlie went in! The very parrot, ye would have thought, was a
+participator, for the beast gied a skraik that made my whole head dirl;
+and the neighbours came flying and flocking to see what was the matter,
+for it was the first parrot ever seen within the bounds of the parish,
+and some thought it was but a foreign hawk, with a yellow head and green
+feathers.
+
+In the midst of all this, Effie Malcolm had run off to the Breadland for
+her sister Kate, and the two lassies came flying breathless, with Miss
+Girzie Gilchrist, the Lady Skimmilk, pursuing them like desperation, or a
+griffin, down the avenue; for Kate, in her hurry, had flung down her
+seam, a new printed gown, that she was helping to make, and it had fallen
+into a boyne of milk that was ready for the creaming, by which issued a
+double misfortune to Miss Girzie, the gown being not only ruined, but
+licking up the cream. For this, poor Kate was not allowed ever to set
+her face in the Breadland again.
+
+When Charlie Malcolm had stayed about a week with his mother, he returned
+to his berth in the Tobacco trader, and shortly after his brother Robert
+was likewise sent to serve his time to the sea, with an owner that was
+master of his own bark, in the coal trade at Irville. Kate, who was
+really a surprising lassie for her years, was taken off her mother’s
+hands by the old Lady Macadam, that lived in her jointure house, which is
+now the Cross Keys Inn. Her ladyship was a woman of high breeding, her
+husband having been a great general, and knighted by the king for his
+exploits; but she was lame, and could not move about in her dining-room
+without help; so hearing from the first Mrs. Balwhidder how Kate had done
+such an unatonable deed to Miss Girzie Gilchrist, she sent for Kate, and,
+finding her sharp and apt, she took her to live with her as a companion.
+This was a vast advantage, for the lady was versed in all manner of
+accomplishments, and could read and speak French with more ease than any
+professor at that time in the College of Glasgow; and she had learnt to
+sew flowers on satin, either in a nunnery abroad, or in a boarding-school
+in England, and took pleasure in teaching Kate all she knew, and how to
+behave herself like a lady.
+
+In the summer of this year, old Mr. Patrick Dilworth, that had so long
+been doited with the paralytics, died, and it was a great relief to my
+people, for the heritors could no longer refuse to get a proper
+schoolmaster; so we took on trial Mr. Lorimore, who has ever since the
+year after, with so much credit to himself, and usefulness to the parish,
+been schoolmaster, session clerk, and precentor—a man of great mildness
+and extraordinary particularity. He was then a very young man, and some
+objection was made, on account of his youth, to his being session-clerk,
+especially as the smuggling immorality still gave us much trouble in the
+making up of irregular marriages; but his discretion was greater than
+could have been hoped for from his years; and, after a twelvemonth’s
+probation in the capacity of schoolmaster, he was installed in all the
+offices that had belonged to his predecessor, old Mr. Patrick Dilworth
+that was.
+
+But the most memorable thing that befell among my people this year, was
+the burning of the lint-mill on the Lugton water, which happened, of all
+the days of the year, on the very selfsame day that Miss Girzie
+Gilchrist, better known as Lady Skimmilk, hired the chaise from Mrs.
+Watts of the New Inns of Irville, to go with her brother, the major, to
+consult the faculty in Edinburgh concerning his complaints. For, as the
+chaise was coming by the mill, William Huckle, the miller that was, came
+flying out of the mill like a demented man, crying fire!—and it was the
+driver that brought the melancholy tidings to the clachan—and melancholy
+they were; for the mill was utterly destroyed, and in it not a little of
+all that year’s crop of lint in our parish. The first Mrs. Balwhidder
+lost upwards of twelve stone, which we had raised on the glebe with no
+small pains, watering it in the drouth, as it was intended for sarking to
+ourselves, and sheets and napery. A great loss indeed it was, and the
+vexation thereof had a visible effect on Mrs. Balwhidder’s health, which
+from the spring had been in a dwining way. But for it, I think she might
+have wrestled through the winter: however, it was ordered otherwise, and
+she was removed from mine to Abraham’s bosom on Christmas-day, and buried
+on Hogmanay, for it was thought uncanny to have a dead corpse in the
+house on the new-year’s day. She was a worthy woman, studying with all
+her capacity to win the hearts of my people towards me—in the which good
+work she prospered greatly; so that, when she died, there was not a
+single soul in the parish that was not contented with both my walk and
+conversation. Nothing could be more peaceable than the way we lived
+together. Her brother Andrew, a fine lad, I had sent to the college at
+Glasgow, at my own cost; and when he came out to the burial, he stayed
+with me a month, for the manse after her decease was very dull, and it
+was during this visit that he gave me an inkling of his wish to go out to
+India as a cadet, but the transactions anent that fall within the scope
+of another year—as well as what relates to her headstone, and the epitaph
+in metre, which I indicated myself thereon; John Truel the mason carving
+the same, as may be seen in the kirkyard, where it wants a little
+reparation and setting upright, having settled the wrong way when the
+second Mrs. Balwhidder was laid by her side.—But I must not here enter
+upon an anticipation.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V
+YEAR 1764
+
+
+THIS year well deserved the name of the monumental year in our parish;
+for the young laird of the Breadland, that had been my pupil, being
+learning to be an advocate among the faculty in Edinburgh, with his lady
+mother, who had removed thither with the young ladies her daughters, for
+the benefit of education, sent out to be put up in the kirk, under the
+loft over the family vault, an elegant marble headstone, with an epitaph
+engraven thereon, in fair Latin, setting forth many excellent qualities
+which the old laird, my patron that was, the inditer thereof said he
+possessed. I say the inditer, because it couldna have been the young
+laird himself, although he got the credit o’t on the stone, for he was
+nae daub in my aught at the Latin or any other language. However, he
+might improve himself at Edinburgh, where a’ manner of genteel things
+were then to be got at an easy rate, and doubtless the young laird got a
+probationer at the College to write the epitaph; but I have often
+wondered sin’ syne, how he came to make it in Latin, for assuredly his
+dead parent, if he could have seen it, could not have read a single word
+o’t, notwithstanding it was so vaunty about his virtues, and other civil
+and hospitable qualifications.
+
+The coming of the laird’s monumental stone had a great effect on me, then
+in a state of deep despondency for the loss of the first Mrs. Balwhidder;
+and I thought I could not do a better thing, just by way of diversion in
+my heavy sorrow, than to get a well-shapen headstone made for her—which,
+as I have hinted at in the record of the last year, was done and set up.
+But a headstone without an epitaph, is no better than a body without the
+breath of life in’t; and so it behoved me to make a poesy for the
+monument, the which I conned and pondered upon for many days. I thought
+as Mrs. Balwhidder, worthy woman as she was, did not understand the Latin
+tongue, it would not do to put on what I had to say in that language, as
+the laird had done—nor indeed would it have been easy, as I found upon
+the experimenting, to tell what I had to tell in Latin, which is
+naturally a crabbed language, and very difficult to write properly. I
+therefore, after mentioning her age and the dates of her birth and
+departure, composed in sedate poetry the following epitaph, which may yet
+be seen on the tombstone.
+
+ EPITAPH
+
+ A lovely Christian, spouse, and friend,
+ Pleasant in life, and at her end.—
+ A pale consumption dealt the blow
+ That laid her here, with dust below.
+ Sore was the cough that shook her frame;
+ That cough her patience did proclaim—
+ And as she drew her latest breath,
+ She said, “The Lord is sweet in death.”
+ O pious reader! standing by,
+ Learn like this gentle one to die.
+ The grass doth grow and fade away,
+ And time runs out by night and day;
+ The King of Terrors has command
+ To strike us with his dart in hand.
+ Go where we will by flood or field,
+ He will pursue and make us yield.
+ But though to him we must resign
+ The vesture of our part divine,
+ There is a jewel in our trust,
+ That will not perish in the dust,
+ A pearl of price, a precious gem,
+ Ordained for Jesus’ diadem;
+ Therefore, be holy while you can,
+ And think upon the doom of man.
+ Repent in time and sin no more,
+ That when the strife of life is o’er,
+ On wings of love your soul may rise,
+ To dwell with angels in the skies,
+ Where psalms are sung eternally,
+ And martyrs ne’er again shall die;
+ But with the saints still bask in bliss,
+ And drink the cup of blessedness.
+
+This was greatly thought of at the time, and Mr. Lorimore, who had a
+nerve for poesy himself in his younger years, was of opinion that it was
+so much to the purpose, and suitable withal, that he made his scholars
+write it out for their examination copies, at the reading whereof before
+the heritors, when the examination of the school came round, the tear
+came into my eye, and every one present sympathized with me in my great
+affliction for the loss of the first Mrs. Balwhidder.
+
+Andrew Langshaw, as I have recorded, having come from the Glasgow College
+to the burial of his sister, my wife that was, stayed with me a month to
+keep me company; and staying with me, he was a great cordial, for the
+weather was wet and sleety, and the nights were stormy, so that I could
+go little out, and few of the elders came in, they being at that time old
+men in a feckless condition, not at all qualified to warsle with the
+blasts of winter. But when Andrew left me to go back to his classes, I
+was eerie and lonesome; and but for the getting of the monument ready,
+which was a blessed entertainment to me in those dreary nights, with
+consulting anent the shape of it with John Truel, and meditating on the
+verse for the epitaph, I might have gone altogether demented. However,
+it pleased Him, who is the surety of the sinner, to help me through the
+Slough of Despond, and to set my feet on firm land, establishing my way
+thereon.
+
+But the work of the monument, and the epitaph, could not endure for a
+constancy, and after it was done, I was again in great danger of sinking
+into the hypochonderies a second time. However, I was enabled to fight
+with my affliction, and by-and-by, as the spring began to open her green
+lattice, and to set out her flower-pots to the sunshine, and the time of
+the singing of birds was come, I became more composed, and like myself,
+so I often walked in the fields, and held communion with nature, and
+wondered at the mysteries thereof.
+
+On one of these occasions, as I was sauntering along the edge of
+Eaglesham-wood, looking at the industrious bee going from flower to
+flower, and the idle butterfly, that layeth up no store, but perisheth
+ere it is winter, I felt as it were a spirit from on high descending upon
+me, a throb at my heart, and a thrill in my brain, and I was transported
+out of myself, and seized with the notion of writing a book—but what it
+should be about, I could not settle to my satisfaction. Sometimes I
+thought of an orthodox poem, like _Paradise Lost_, by John Milton,
+wherein I proposed to treat more at large of Original Sin, and the great
+mystery of Redemption; at others, I fancied that a connect treatise on
+the efficacy of Free Grace would be more taking; but although I made
+divers beginnings in both subjects, some new thought ever came into my
+head, and the whole summer passed away and nothing was done. I therefore
+postponed my design of writing a book till the winter, when I would have
+the benefit of the long nights. Before that, however, I had other things
+of more importance to think about. My servant lasses, having no eye of a
+mistress over them, wastered every thing at such a rate, and made such a
+galravitching in the house, that, long before the end of the year, the
+year’s stipend was all spent, and I did not know what to do. At lang and
+length I mustered courage to send for Mr. Auld, who was then living, and
+an elder. He was a douce and discreet man, fair and well-doing in the
+world, and had a better handful of strong common sense than many even of
+the heritors. So I told him how I was situated, and conferred with him;
+and he advised me, for my own sake, to look out for another wife as soon
+as decency would allow, which he thought might very properly be after the
+turn of the year, by which time the first Mrs. Balwhidder would be dead
+more than twelve months; and when I mentioned my design to write a book,
+he said, (and he was a man of good discretion), that the doing of the
+book was a thing that would keep, but masterful servants were a growing
+evil; so, upon his counselling, I resolved not to meddle with the book
+till I was married again, but employ the interim, between then and the
+turn of the year, in looking out for a prudent woman to be my second
+wife, strictly intending, as I did perform, not to mint a word about my
+choice, if I made one, till the whole twelve months and a day, from the
+date of the first Mrs. Balwhidder’s interment, had run out.
+
+ [Picture: Sabbath Morning]
+
+In this the hand of Providence was very visible, and lucky for me it was
+that I had sent for Mr. Auld when I did send, as the very week following,
+a sound began to spread in the parish, that one of my lassies had got
+herself with bairn, which was an awful thing to think had happened in the
+house of her master, and that master a minister of the gospel. Some
+there were, for backbiting appertaineth to all conditions, that jealoused
+and wondered if I had not a finger in the pie; which, when Mr. Auld
+heard, he bestirred himself in such a manful and godly way in my defence,
+as silenced the clash, telling that I was utterly incapable of any such
+thing, being a man of a guileless heart, and a spiritual simplicity, that
+would be ornamental in a child. We then had the latheron summoned before
+the session, and was not long of making her confess that the father was
+Nichol Snipe, Lord Glencairn’s gamekeeper; and both her and Nichol were
+obligated to stand in the kirk: but Nichol was a graceless reprobate, for
+he came with two coats, one buttoned behind him, and another buttoned
+before him, and two wigs of my lord’s, lent him by the valet-de-chamer;
+the one over his face, and the other in the right way; and he stood with
+his face to the church-wall. When I saw him from the poopit, I said to
+him—“Nichol, you must turn your face towards me!” At the which, he
+turned round to be sure, but there he presented the same show as his
+back. I was confounded, and did not know what to say, but cried out with
+a voice of anger—“Nichol, Nichol! if ye had been a’ back, ye wouldna hae
+been there this day;” which had such an effect on the whole congregation,
+that the poor fellow suffered afterwards more derision, than if I had
+rebuked him in the manner prescribed by the session.
+
+This affair, with the previous advice of Mr. Auld, was, however, a
+warning to me, that no pastor of his parish should be long without a
+helpmate. Accordingly, as soon as the year was out, I set myself
+earnestly about the search for one; but as the particulars fall properly
+within the scope and chronicle of the next year, I must reserve them for
+it; and I do not recollect that any thing more particular befell in this,
+excepting that William Mutchkins, the father of Mr. Mutchkins, the great
+spirit-dealer in Glasgow, set up a change-house in the clachan, which was
+the first in the parish, and which, if I could have helped, would have
+been the last; for it was opening a howf to all manner of wickedness, and
+was an immediate get and offspring of the smuggling trade, against which
+I had so set my countenance. But William Mutchkins himself was a
+respectable man, and no house could be better ordered than his change.
+At a stated hour he made family worship, for he brought up his children
+in the fear of God and the Christian religion; and although the house was
+full, he would go in to the customers, and ask them if they would want
+anything for half an hour, for that he was going to make exercise with
+his family; and many a wayfaring traveller has joined in the prayer.
+There is no such thing, I fear, nowadays, of publicans entertaining
+travellers in this manner.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI
+YEAR 1765
+
+
+AS there was little in the last year that concerned the parish, but only
+myself, so in this the like fortune continued; and saving a rise in the
+price of barley, occasioned, as was thought, by the establishment of a
+house for brewing whisky in a neighbouring parish, it could not be said
+that my people were exposed to the mutations and influences of the stars,
+which ruled in the seasons of Ann. Dom. 1765. In the winter there was a
+dearth of fuel, such as has not been since; for when the spring loosened
+the bonds of the ice, three new coal-heughs were shanked in the Douray
+moor, and ever since there has been a great plenty of that necessary
+article. Truly, it is very wonderful to see how things come round. When
+the talk was about the shanking of their heughs, and a paper to get folk
+to take shares in them, was carried through the circumjacent parishes, it
+was thought a gowk’s errand; but no sooner was the coal reached, but up
+sprung such a traffic, that it was a godsend to the parish, and the
+opening of a trade and commerce, that has, to use an old byword, brought
+gold in gowpins amang us. From that time my stipend has been on the
+regular increase, and therefore I think that the incoming of the heritors
+must have been in like manner augmented.
+
+Soon after this, the time was drawing near for my second marriage. I had
+placed my affections, with due consideration, on Miss Lizy Kibbock, the
+well brought-up daughter of Mr. Joseph Kibbock of the Gorbyholm, who was
+the first that made a speculation in the farming way in Ayrshire, and
+whose cheese were of such an excellent quality, that they have, under the
+name of Delap-cheese, spread far and wide over the civilized world. Miss
+Lizy and me were married on the 29th day of April, with some
+inconvenience to both sides, on account of the dread that we had of being
+married in May; for it is said—
+
+ “Of the marriages in May,
+ The bairns die of a decay.”
+
+However, married we were, and we hired the Irville chaise, and with Miss
+Jenny her sister, and Becky Cairns her niece, who sat on a portmanty at
+our feet, we went on a pleasure jaunt to Glasgow, where we bought a
+miracle of useful things for the manse, that neither the first Mrs.
+Balwhidder nor me ever thought of; but the second Mrs. Balwhidder that
+was, had a geni for management, and it was extraordinary what she could
+go through. Well may I speak of her with commendations; for she was the
+bee that made my honey, although at first things did not go so clear with
+us. For she found the manse rookit and herrit, and there was such a
+supply of plenishing of all sort wanted, that I thought myself ruined and
+undone by her care and industry. There was such a buying of wool to make
+blankets, with a booming of the meikle wheel to spin the same, and such
+birring of the little wheel for sheets and napery, that the manse was for
+many a day like an organ kist. Then we had milk cows, and the calves to
+bring up, and a kirning of butter, and a making of cheese; in short, I
+was almost by myself with the jangle and din, which prevented me from
+writing a book as I had proposed, and I for a time thought of the
+peaceful and kindly nature of the first Mrs. Balwhidder with a sigh; but
+the outcoming was soon manifest. The second Mrs. Balwhidder sent her
+butter on the market-days to Irville, and her cheese from time to time to
+Glasgow, to Mrs. Firlot, that kept the huxtry in the Saltmarket; and they
+were both so well made, that our dairy was just a coining of money,
+insomuch that, after the first year, we had the whole tot of my stipend
+to put untouched into the bank.
+
+But I must say, that although we were thus making siller like sclate
+stones, I was not satisfied in my own mind that I had got the manse
+merely to be a factory of butter and cheese, and to breed up veal calves
+for the slaughter; so I spoke to the second Mrs. Balwhidder, and pointed
+out to her what I thought the error of our way; but she had been so
+ingrained with the profitable management of cows and grumphies in her
+father’s house, that she could not desist, at the which I was greatly
+grieved. By-and-by, however, I began to discern that there was something
+as good in her example, as the giving of alms to the poor folk; for all
+the wives of the parish were stirred up by it into a wonderful thrift,
+and nothing was heard of in every house, but of quiltings and wabs to
+weave; insomuch that, before many years came round, there was not a
+better stocked parish, with blankets and napery, than mine was, within
+the bounds of Scotland.
+
+It was about the Michaelmas of this year that Mrs. Malcolm opened her
+shop, which she did chiefly on the advice of Mrs. Balwhidder, who said it
+was far better to allow a little profit on the different haberdasheries
+that might be wanted, than to send to the neighbouring towns an end’s
+errand on purpose for them, none of the lasses that were so sent ever
+thinking of making less than a day’s play on every such occasion. In a
+word, it is not to be told how the second Mrs. Balwhidder, my wife,
+showed the value of flying time, even to the concerns of this world, and
+was the mean of giving a life and energy to the housewifery of the
+parish, that has made many a one beek his shins in comfort, that would
+otherwise have had but a cold coal to blow at. Indeed, Mr. Kibbock, her
+father, was a man beyond the common, and had an insight of things, by
+which he was enabled to draw profit and advantage, where others could
+only see risk and detriment. He planted mounts of fir-trees on the bleak
+and barren tops of the hills of his farm, the which everybody, and I
+among the rest, considered as a thrashing of the water and raising of
+bells. But as his rack ran his trees grew, and the plantations supplied
+him with stabs to make _stake and rice_ between his fields, which soon
+gave them a trig and orderly appearance, such as had never before been
+seen in the west country; and his example has, in this matter, been so
+followed, that I have heard travellers say, who have been in foreign
+countries, that the shire of Ayr, for its bonny round green plantings on
+the tops of the hills, is above comparison either with Italy or
+Switzerland, where the hills are, as it were, in a state of nature.
+
+Upon the whole, this was a busy year in the parish, and the seeds of many
+great improvements were laid. The king’s road, the which then ran
+through the Vennel, was mended; but it was not till some years after, as
+I shall record by-and-by, that the trust-road, as it was called, was
+made, the which had the effect of turning the town inside out.
+
+Before I conclude, it is proper to mention that the kirk-bell, which had
+to this time, from time immemorial, hung on an ash-tree, was one stormy
+night cast down by the breaking of the branch, which was the cause of the
+heritors agreeing to build the steeple. The clock was a mortification to
+the parish from the Lady Breadland, when she died some years after.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII
+YEAR 1766
+
+
+IT was in this Ann. Dom. that the great calamity happened, the which took
+place on a Sabbath evening in the month of February. Mrs. Balwhidder had
+just infused or masket the tea, and we were set round the fireside, to
+spend the night in an orderly and religious manner, along with Mr. and
+Mrs. Petticrew, who were on a friendly visitation to the manse, the
+mistress being full cousin to Mrs. Balwhidder.—Sitting, as I was saying,
+at our tea, one of the servant lasses came into the room with a sort of a
+panic laugh, and said, “What are ye all doing there when the Breadland’s
+in a low?”—“The Breadland in a low!” cried I.—“Oh, ay!” cried she;
+“bleezing at the windows and the rigging, and out at the lum, like a
+killogie.” Upon the which, we all went to the door, and there, to be
+sure, we did see that the Breadland was burning, the flames crackling
+high out o’er the trees, and the sparks flying like a comet’s tail in the
+firmament.
+
+Seeing this sight, I said to Mr. Petticrew, that, in the strength of the
+Lord, I would go and see what could be done, for it was as plain as the
+sun in the heavens that the ancient place of the Breadlands would be
+destroyed; whereupon he accorded to go with me, and we walked at a lively
+course to the spot, and the people from all quarters were pouring in, and
+it was an awsome scene. But the burning of the house, and the droves of
+the multitude, were nothing to what we saw when we got forenent the
+place. There was the rafters crackling, the flames raging, the servants
+running, some with bedding, some with looking-glasses, and others with
+chamber utensils as little likely to be fuel to the fire, but all
+testifications to the confusion and alarm. Then there was a shout,
+“Whar’s Miss Girzie? whar’s the Major?” The Major, poor man, soon cast
+up, lying upon a feather-bed, ill with his complaints, in the garden; but
+Lady Skimmilk was nowhere to be found. At last, a figure was seen in the
+upper flat, pursued by the flames, and that was Miss Girzie. Oh! it was
+a terrible sight to look at her in that jeopardy at the window, with her
+gold watch in the one hand and the silver teapot in the other, skreighing
+like desperation for a ladder and help. But, before a ladder or help
+could be found, the floor sunk down, and the roof fell in, and poor Miss
+Girzie, with her idols, perished in the burning. It was a dreadful
+business! I think, to this hour, how I saw her at the window, how the
+fire came in behind her, and claught her like a fiery Belzebub, and bore
+her into perdition before our eyes. The next morning the atomy of the
+body was found among the rubbish, with a piece of metal in what had been
+each of its hands, no doubt the gold watch and the silver teapot. Such
+was the end of Miss Girzie; and the Breadland, which the young laird, my
+pupil that was, by growing a resident at Edinburgh, never rebuilt. It
+was burnt to the very ground; nothing was spared but what the servants in
+the first flaught gathered up in a hurry and ran with; but no one could
+tell how the Major, who was then, as it was thought by the faculty, past
+the power of nature to recover, got out of the house, and was laid on the
+feather-bed in the garden. However, he never got the better of that
+night, and before Whitsunday he was dead too, and buried beside his
+sister’s bones at the south side of the kirkyard dyke, where his cousin’s
+son, that was his heir, erected the handsome monument, with the three
+urns and weeping cherubims, bearing witness to the great valour of the
+Major among the Hindoos, as well as other commendable virtues, for which,
+as the epitaph says, he was universally esteemed and beloved, by all who
+knew him, in his public and private capacity.
+
+But although the burning of the Breadland-House was justly called the
+great calamity, on account of what happened to Miss Girzie with her gold
+watch and silver teapot; yet, as Providence never fails to bring good out
+of evil, it turned out a catastrophe that proved advantageous to the
+parish; for the laird, instead of thinking to build it up, was advised to
+let the policy out as a farm, and the tack was taken by Mr. Coulter, than
+whom there had been no such man in the agriculturing line among us
+before, not even excepting Mr. Kibbock of the Gorbyholm, my father-in-law
+that was. Of the stabling, Mr. Coulter made a comfortable
+dwelling-house; and having rugget out the evergreens and other
+unprofitable plants, saving the twa ancient yew-trees which the
+near-begaun Major and his sister had left to go to ruin about the
+mansion-house, he turned all to production, and it was wonderful what an
+increase he made the land bring forth. He was from far beyond Edinburgh,
+and had got his insight among the Lothian farmers, so that he knew what
+crop should follow another, and nothing could surpass the regularity of
+his rigs and furrows.—Well do I remember the admiration that I had, when,
+in a fine sunny morning of the first spring after he took the Breadland,
+I saw his braird on what had been the cows’ grass, as even and pretty as
+if it had been worked and stripped in the loom with a shuttle. Truly,
+when I look back at the example he set, and when I think on the method
+and dexterity of his management, I must say, that his coming to the
+parish was a great godsend, and tended to do far more for the benefit of
+my people, than if the young laird had rebuilded the Breadland-House in a
+fashionable style, as was at one time spoken of.
+
+But the year of the great calamity was memorable for another thing:—in
+the December foregoing, the wind blew, as I have recorded in the
+chronicle of the last year, and broke down the bough of the tree whereon
+the kirk-bell had hung from the time, as was supposed, of the
+persecution, before the bringing over of King William. Mr. Kibbock, my
+father-in-law then that was, being a man of a discerning spirit, when he
+heard of the unfortunate fall of the bell, advised me to get the heritors
+to big a steeple; but which, when I thought of the expense, I was afraid
+to do. He, however, having a great skill in the heart of man, gave me no
+rest on the subject; but told me, that if I allowed the time to go by
+till the heritors were used to come to the kirk without a bell, I would
+get no steeple at all. I often wondered what made Mr. Kibbock so fond of
+a steeple, which is a thing that I never could see a good reason for,
+saving that it is an ecclesiastical adjunct, like the gown and bands.
+However, he set me on to get a steeple proposed, and after no little
+argol-bargling with the heritors, it was agreed to. This was chiefly
+owing to the instrumentality of Lady Moneyplack, who, in that winter, was
+much subjected to the rheumatics, she having, one cold and raw Sunday
+morning, there being no bell to announce the time, come half an hour too
+soon to the kirk, made her bestir herself to get an interest awakened
+among the heritors in behalf of a steeple.
+
+But when the steeple was built, a new contention arose. It was thought
+that the bell, which had been used in the ash-tree, would not do in a
+stone and lime fabric; so, after great agitation among the heritors, it
+was resolved to sell the old bell to a foundery in Glasgow, and buy a new
+bell suitable to the steeple, which was a very comely fabric. The buying
+of the new bell led to other considerations, and the old Lady Breadland,
+being at the time in a decaying condition, and making her will, she left
+a mortification to the parish, as I have intimated, to get a clock; so
+that, by the time the steeple was finished, and the bell put up, the Lady
+Breadland’s legacy came to be implemented, according to the ordination of
+the testatrix.
+
+Of the casualities that happened in this year, I should not forget to put
+down, as a thing for remembrance, that an aged woman, one Nanse Birrel, a
+distillator of herbs, and well skilled in the healing of sores, who had a
+great repute among the quarriers and colliers—she having gone to the
+physic well in the sandy hills to draw water, was found, with her feet
+uppermost in the well, by some of the bairns of Mr. Lorimore’s school;
+and there was a great debate whether Nanse had fallen in by accident head
+foremost, or, in a temptation, thrown herself in that position, with her
+feet sticking up to the evil one; for Nanse was a curious discontented
+blear-eyed woman, and it was only with great ado that I could get the
+people keepit from calling her a witchwife.
+
+I should likewise place on record, that the first ass that had ever been
+seen in this part of the country, came in the course of this year with a
+gang of tinklers, that made horn-spoons and mended bellows. Where they
+came from never was well made out; but being a blackaviced crew, they
+were generally thought to be Egyptians. They tarried about a week among
+us, living in tents, with their little ones squattling among the litter;
+and one of the older men of them set and tempered to me two razors, that
+were as good as nothing, but which he made better than when they were
+new.
+
+ [Picture: The Old Ploughman]
+
+Shortly after, but I am not quite sure whether it was in the end of this
+year, or the beginning of the next, although I have a notion that it was
+in this, there came over from Ireland a troop of wild Irish, seeking for
+work as they said; but they made free quarters, for they herrit the
+roosts of the clachan, and cutted the throat of a sow of ours, the
+carcass of which they no doubt intended to steal; but something came over
+them, and it was found lying at the back side of the manse, to the great
+vexation of Mrs. Balwhidder; for she had set her mind on a clecking of
+pigs, and only waited for the China boar, that had been brought down from
+London by Lord Eaglesham, to mend the breed of pork—a profitable
+commodity, that her father, Mr. Kibbock, cultivated for the Glasgow
+market. The destruction of our sow, under such circumstances, was
+therefore held to be a great crime and cruelty, and it had the effect to
+raise up such a spirit in the clachan, that the Irish were obligated to
+decamp; and they set out for Glasgow, where one of them was afterwards
+hanged for a fact, but the truth concerning how he did it, I either never
+heard, or it has passed from my mind, like many other things I should
+have carefully treasured.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII
+YEAR 1767
+
+
+ALL things in our parish were now beginning to shoot up into a great
+prosperity. The spirit of farming began to get the upper hand of the
+spirit of smuggling, and the coal-heughs that had been opened in the
+Douray, now brought a pour of money among us. In the manse, the thrift
+and frugality of the second Mrs. Balwhidder throve exceedingly, so that
+we could save the whole stipend for the bank.
+
+The king’s highway, as I have related in the foregoing, ran through the
+Vennel, which was a narrow and a crooked street, with many big stones
+here and there, and every now and then, both in the spring and the fall,
+a gathering of middens for the fields; insomuch that the coal-carts from
+the Douray moor were often reested in the middle of the causey, and on
+more than one occasion some of them laired altogether in the middens, and
+others of them broke down. Great complaint was made by the carters anent
+these difficulties, and there was, for many a day, a talk and sound of an
+alteration and amendment; but nothing was fulfilled in the matter till
+the month of March in this year, when the Lord Eaglesham was coming from
+London to see the new lands that he had bought in our parish. His
+lordship was a man of a genteel spirit, and very fond of his horses,
+which were the most beautiful creatures of their kind that had been seen
+in all the country side. Coming, as I was noting, to see his new lands,
+he was obliged to pass through the clachan one day, when all the middens
+were gathered out, reeking and sappy, in the middle of the causey. Just
+as his lordship was driving in with his prancing steeds, like a Jehu, at
+one end of the vennel, a long string of loaded coal-carts came in at the
+other, and there was hardly room for my lord to pass them. What was to
+be done? His lordship could not turn back, and the coal-carts were in no
+less perplexity. Every body was out of doors to see and to help; when,
+in trying to get his lordship’s carriage over the top of a midden, the
+horses gave a sudden loup, and couped the coach, and threw my lord, head
+foremost, into the very scent-bottle of the whole commodity, which made
+him go perfect mad, and he swore like a trooper that he would get an act
+of parliament to put down the nuisance—the which now ripened in the
+course of this year into the undertaking of the trust-road.
+
+His lordship, being in a woeful plight, left the carriage and came to the
+manse, till his servant went to the castle for a change for him; but he
+could not wait nor abide himself: so he got the lend of my best suit of
+clothes, and was wonderful jocose both with Mrs. Balwhidder and me, for
+he was a portly man, and I but a thin body, and it was really a droll
+curiosity to see his lordship clad in my garments.
+
+Out of this accident grew a sort of a neighbourliness between that Lord
+Eaglesham and me; so that when Andrew Lanshaw, the brother that was of
+the first Mrs. Balwhidder, came to think of going to India, I wrote to my
+lord for his behoof, and his lordship got him sent out as a cadet, and
+was extraordinary discreet to Andrew when he went up to London to take
+his passage, speaking to him of me as if I had been a very saint, which
+the Searcher of Hearts knows I am far from thinking myself.
+
+But to return to the making of the trust-road, which, as I have said,
+turned the town inside out. It was agreed among the heritors, that it
+should run along the back side of the south houses; and that there should
+be steadings fued off on each side, according to a plan that was laid
+down; and this being gone into, the town gradually, in the course of
+years, grew up into that orderlyness which makes it now a pattern to the
+country side—all which was mainly owing to the accident that befell the
+Lord Eaglesham, which is a clear proof how improvements come about, as it
+were, by the immediate instigation of Providence, which should make the
+heart of man humble, and change his eyes of pride and haughtiness into a
+lowly demeanour.
+
+But although this making of the trust-road was surely a great thing for
+the parish, and of an advantage to my people, we met, in this year, with
+a loss not to be compensated—that was the death of Nanse Banks, the
+schoolmistress. She had been long in a weak and frail state; but being a
+methodical creature, still kept on the school, laying the foundation for
+many a worthy wife and mother. However, about the decline of the year
+her complaints increased, and she sent for me to consult about her giving
+up the school; and I went to see her on Saturday afternoon, when the bit
+lassies, her scholars, had put the house in order, and gone home till the
+Monday.
+
+She was sitting in the window-nook, reading THE WORD to herself, when I
+entered; but she closed the book, and put her spectacles in for a mark
+when she saw me; and, as it was expected I would come, her easy-chair,
+with a clean cover, had been set out for me by the scholars, by which I
+discerned that there was something more than common to happen, and so it
+appeared when I had taken my seat.
+
+“Sir,” said she, “I hae sent for you on a thing troubles me sairly. I
+have warsled with poortith in this shed, which it has pleased the Lord to
+allow me to possess; but my strength is worn out, and I fear I maun yield
+in the strife;” and she wiped her eye with her apron. I told her,
+however, to be of good cheer; and then she said, “That she could no
+longer thole the din of the school, and that she was weary, and ready to
+lay herself down to die whenever the Lord was pleased to permit.” “But,”
+continued she, “what can I do without the school; and, alas! I can
+neither work nor want; and I am wae to go on the session, for I am come
+of a decent family.” I comforted her, and told her, that I thought she
+had done so much good in the parish, that the session was deep in her
+debt, and that what they might give her was but a just payment for her
+service. “I would rather, however, sir,” said she, “try first what some
+of my auld scholars will do, and it was for that I wanted to speak with
+you. If some of them would but just, from time to time, look in upon me,
+that I may not die alane; and the little pick and drap that I require
+would not be hard upon them—I am more sure that in this way their
+gratitude would be no discredit, than I am of having any claim on the
+session.”
+
+As I had always a great respect for an honest pride, I assured her that I
+would do what she wanted; and accordingly, the very morning after, being
+Sabbath, I preached a sermon on the helplessness of them that have no
+help of man, meaning aged single women, living in garret-rooms, whose
+forlorn state, in the gloaming of life, I made manifest to the hearts and
+understandings of the congregation, in such a manner that many shed
+tears, and went away sorrowful.
+
+Having thus roused the feelings of my people, I went round the houses on
+the Monday morning, and mentioned what I had to say more particularly
+about poor old Nanse Banks, the schoolmistress, and truly I was rejoiced
+at the condition of the hearts of my people. There was a universal
+sympathy among them; and it was soon ordered that, what with one and
+another, her decay should be provided for. But it was not ordained that
+she should be long heavy on their good-will. On the Monday the school
+was given up, and there was nothing but wailing among the bit lassies,
+the scholars, for getting the vacance, as the poor things said, because
+the mistress was going to lie down to dee. And, indeed, so it came to
+pass; for she took to her bed the same afternoon, and, in the course of
+the week, dwindled away, and slipped out of this howling wilderness into
+the kingdom of heaven, on the Sabbath following, as quietly as a blessed
+saint could do. And here I should mention, that the Lady Macadam, when I
+told her of Nanse Banks’s case, enquired if she was a snuffer, and, being
+answered by me that she was, her ladyship sent her a pretty French enamel
+box full of macabaw, a fine snuff that she had in a bottle; and, among
+the macabaw, was found a guinea, at the bottom of the box, after Nanse
+Banks had departed this life, which was a kind thing of Lady Macadam to
+do.
+
+About the close of this year there was a great sough of old prophecies,
+foretelling mutations and adversities, chiefly on account of the canal
+that was spoken of to join the rivers of the Clyde and the Forth, it
+being thought an impossible thing to be done; and the Adam and Eve
+pear-tree, in our garden, budded out in an awful manner, and had divers
+flourishes on it at Yule, which was thought an ominous thing, especially
+as the second Mrs. Balwhidder was at the downlying with my eldest son
+Gilbert, that is, the merchant in Glasgow; but nothing came o’t, and the
+howdie said she had an easy time when the child came into the world,
+which was on the very last day of the year, to the great satisfaction of
+me, and of my people, who were wonderful lifted up because their minister
+had a man-child born unto him.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX
+YEAR 1768
+
+
+IT’S a surprising thing how time flieth away, carrying off our youth and
+strength, and leaving us nothing but wrinkles and the ails of old age.
+Gilbert, my son, that is now a corpulent man, and a Glasgow merchant,
+when I take up my pen to record the memorables of this Ann. Dom., seems
+to me yet but a suckling in swaddling clothes, mewing and peevish in the
+arms of his mother, that has been long laid in the cold kirkyard, beside
+her predecessor, in Abraham’s bosom. It is not, however, my design to
+speak much anent my own affairs, which would be a very improper and
+uncomely thing, but only of what happened in the parish, this book being
+for a witness and testimony of my ministry. Therefore, setting out of
+view both me and mine, I will now resuscitate the concerns of Mrs.
+Malcolm and her children; for, as I think, never was there such a visible
+preordination seen in the lives of any persons, as was seen in that of
+this worthy decent woman, and her well-doing off-spring. Her morning was
+raw, and a sore blight fell upon her fortunes; but the sun looked out on
+her midday, and her evening closed loun and warm; and the stars of the
+firmament, that are the eyes of heaven, beamed as it were with gladness,
+when she lay down to sleep the sleep of rest.
+
+Her son Charles was by this time grown up into a stout buirdly lad, and
+it was expected that, before the return of the Tobacco trader, he would
+have been out of his time, and a man afore the mast, which was a great
+step of preferment, as I heard say by persons skilled in seafaring
+concerns. But this was not ordered to happen; for, when the Tobacco
+trader was lying in the harbour of Virginia in the North Americas, a
+pressgang, that was in need of men for a man-of-war, came on board, and
+pressed poor Charles, and sailed away with him on a cruise, nobody, for
+many a day, could tell where, till I thought of the Lord Eaglesham’s
+kindness. His lordship having something to say with the king’s
+government, I wrote to him, telling him who I was, and how jocose he had
+been when buttoned in my clothes, that he might recollect me, thanking
+him, at the same time, for his condescension and patronage to Andrew
+Lanshaw, in his way to the East Indies. I then slipped in, at the end of
+the letter, a bit nota-bene concerning the case of Charles Malcolm,
+begging his lordship, on account of the poor lad’s widow mother, to
+enquire at the government if they could tell us any thing about Charles.
+In the due course of time, I got a most civil reply from his lordship,
+stating all about the name of the man-of-war, and where she was; and at
+the conclusion his lordship said, that I was lucky in having the brother
+of a Lord of the Admiralty on this occasion for my agent, as otherwise,
+from the vagueness of my statement, the information might not have been
+procured; which remark of his lordship was long a great riddle to me; for
+I could not think what he meant about an agent, till, in the course of
+the year, we heard that his own brother was concerned in the admiralty;
+so that all his lordship meant was only to crack a joke with me, and that
+he was ever ready and free to do, as shall be related in the sequel, for
+he was an excellent man.
+
+There being a vacancy for a schoolmistress, it was proposed to Mrs.
+Malcolm, that, under her superintendence, her daughter Kate, that had
+been learning great artifices in needle-work so long with Lady Macadam,
+should take up the school, and the session undertook to make good to Kate
+the sum of five pounds sterling per annum, over and above what the
+scholars were to pay. But Mrs. Malcolm said she had not strength herself
+to warsle with so many unruly brats, and that Kate, though a fine lassie,
+was a tempestuous spirit, and might lame some of the bairns in her
+passion; and that selfsame night, Lady Macadam wrote me a very
+complaining letter, for trying to wile away her companion; but her
+ladyship was a canary-headed woman, and given to flights and tantrums,
+having in her youth been a great toast among the quality. It would,
+however, have saved her from a sore heart, had she never thought of
+keeping Kate Malcolm. For this year her only son, who was learning the
+art of war at an academy in France, came to pay her, his lady mother, a
+visit. He was a brisk and light-hearted stripling, and Kate Malcolm was
+budding into a very rose of beauty; so between them a hankering began,
+which, for a season, was productive of great heaviness of heart to the
+poor old cripple lady; indeed, she assured me herself, that all her
+rheumatics were nothing to the heart-ache which she suffered in the
+progress of this business. But that will be more treated of hereafter;
+suffice it to say for the present, that we have thus recorded how the
+plan for making Kate Malcolm our schoolmistress came to nought. It
+pleased, however, Him, from whom cometh every good and perfect gift, to
+send at this time among us a Miss Sabrina Hooky, the daughter of old Mr.
+Hooky, who had been schoolmaster in a neighbouring parish. She had gone,
+after his death, to live with an auntie in Glasgow, that kept a shop in
+the Gallowgate. It was thought that the old woman would have left her
+heir to all her gatherings, and so she said she would, but alas! our life
+is but within our lip. Before her testament was made, she was carried
+suddenly off by an apoplectick, an awful monument of the uncertainty of
+time and the nearness of eternity, in her own shop, as she was in the
+very act of weighing out an ounce of snuff to a professor of the College,
+as Miss Sabrina herself told me. Being thus destitute, it happened that
+Miss Sabrina heard of the vacancy in our parish, as it were, just by the
+cry of a passing bird, for she could not tell how; although I judge
+myself that William Keckle the elder had a hand in it, as he was at the
+time in Glasgow; and she wrote me a wonderful well-penned letter
+bespeaking the situation, which letter came to hand on the morn following
+Lady Macadam’s stramash to me about Kate Malcolm, and I laid it before
+the session the same day; so that, by the time her auntie’s concern was
+taken off her hands, she had a home and a howf among us to come in, to
+the which she lived upwards of thirty years in credit and respect,
+although some thought she had not the art of her predecessor, and was
+more uppish in her carriage than befitted the decorum of her vocation.
+Hers, however, was but a harmless vanity; and, poor woman, she needed all
+manner of graces to set her out; for she was made up of odds and ends,
+and had but one good eye, the other being blind, and just like a blue
+bead. At first she plainly set her cap for Mr. Lorimore, but after
+oggling and goggling at him every Sunday in the kirk for a whole
+half-year and more, Miss Sabrina desisted in despair.
+
+But the most remarkable thing about her coming into the parish, was the
+change that took place in Christian names among us. Old Mr. Hooky, her
+father, had, from the time he read his Virgil, maintained a sort of
+intromission with the nine muses, by which he was led to baptize her
+Sabrina, after a name mentioned by John Milton in one of his works. Miss
+Sabrina began by calling our Jennies Jessies, and our Nannies Nancies;
+alas! I have lived to see even these likewise grow old-fashioned. She
+had also a taste in the mantua-making line, which she had learnt in
+Glasgow; and I could date from the very Sabbath of her first appearance
+in the kirk, a change growing in the garb of the younger lassies, who
+from that day began to lay aside the silken plaidie over the head, the
+which had been the pride and bravery of their grandmothers; and instead
+of the snood, that was so snod and simple, they hided their heads in
+round-eared bees-cap mutches, made of gauze and catgut, and other curious
+contrivances of French millendery; all which brought a deal of custom to
+Miss Sabrina, over and above the incomings and Candlemas offerings of
+school; insomuch that she saved money, and in the course of three years
+had ten pounds to put in the bank.
+
+At the time, these alterations and revolutions in the parish were thought
+a great advantage; but now when I look back upon them, as a traveller on
+the hill over the road he has passed, I have my doubts. For with wealth
+come wants, like a troop of clamorous beggars at the heels of a generous
+man; and it’s hard to tell wherein the benefit of improvement in a
+country parish consists, especially to those who live by the sweat of
+their brow. But it is not for me to make reflections; my task and duty
+is to note the changes of time and habitudes.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X
+YEAR 1769
+
+
+I HAVE my doubts whether it was in the beginning of this year, or in the
+end of the last, that a very extraordinary thing came to light in the
+parish; but, howsoever that may be, there is nothing more certain than
+the fact, which it is my duty to record. I have mentioned already how it
+was that the toll, or trust-road, was set a-going, on account of the Lord
+Eaglesham’s tumbling on the midden in the Vennel. Well, it happened to
+one of the labouring men, in breaking the stones to make metal for the
+new road, that he broke a stone that was both large and remarkable, and
+in the heart of it, which was boss, there was found a living creature,
+that jumped out the moment it saw the light of heaven, to the great
+terrification of the man, who could think it was nothing but an evil
+spirit that had been imprisoned therein for a time. The man came to me
+like a demented creature, and the whole clachan gathered out, young and
+old, and I went at their head to see what the miracle could be, for the
+man said it was a fiery dragon, spewing smoke and flames. But when we
+came to the spot, it was just a yird toad, and the laddie weans nevelled
+it to death with stones, before I could persuade them to give over.
+Since then, I have read of such things coming to light in the _Scots
+Magazine_, a very valuable book.
+
+ [Picture: The Elder’s Wife]
+
+Soon after the affair of “the wee deil in the stane,” as it was called, a
+sough reached us that the Americas were seized with the rebellious spirit
+of the ten tribes, and were snapping their fingers in the face of the
+king’s government. The news came on a Saturday night, for we had no
+newspapers in those days, and was brought by Robin Modiwort, that fetched
+the letters from the Irville post. Thomas Fullarton (he has been dead
+many a day) kept the grocery shop at Irville, and he had been in at
+Glasgow, as was his yearly custom, to settle his accounts, and to buy a
+hogshead of tobacco, with sugar and other spiceries; and being in
+Glasgow, Thomas was told by the merchant of a great rise in tobacco, that
+had happened by reason of the contumacity of the plantations, and it was
+thought that blood would be spilt before things were ended, for that the
+King and Parliament were in a great passion with them. But as Charles
+Malcolm, in the king’s ship, was the only one belonging to the parish
+that was likely to be art and part in the business, we were in a manner
+little troubled at the time with this first gasp of the monster of war,
+who, for our sins, was ordained to swallow up and devour so many of our
+fellow-subjects, before he was bound again in the chains of mercy and
+peace.
+
+I had, in the meantime, written a letter to the Lord Eaglesham, to get
+Charles Malcolm out of the clutches of the pressgang in the man-of-war;
+and about a month after, his lordship sent me an answer, wherein was
+enclosed a letter from the captain of the ship, saying, that Charles
+Malcolm was so good a man that he was reluctant to part with him, and
+that Charles himself was well contented to remain aboard. Anent which,
+his lordship said to me, that he had written back to the captain to make
+a midshipman of Charles, and that he would take him under his own
+protection, which was great joy on two accounts to us all, especially to
+his mother; first, to hear that Charles was a good man, although in years
+still but a youth; and, secondly, that my lord had, of his own free-will,
+taken him under the wing of his patronage.
+
+But the sweet of this world is never to be enjoyed without some of the
+sour. The coal bark between Irville and Belfast, in which Robert
+Malcolm, the second son of his mother, was serving his time to be a
+sailor, got a charter, as it was called, to go with to Norway for deals,
+which grieved Mrs. Malcolm to the very heart; for there was then no short
+cut by the canal, as now is, between the rivers of the Forth and Clyde,
+but every ship was obligated to go far away round by the Orkneys, which,
+although a voyage in the summer not overly dangerous, there being long
+days and short nights then, yet in the winter it was far otherwise, many
+vessels being frozen up in the Baltic till the spring; and there was a
+story told at the time, of an Irville bark coming home in the dead of the
+year, that lost her way altogether, and was supposed to have sailed north
+into utter darkness, for she was never more heard of: and many an awful
+thing was said of what the auld mariners about the shore thought
+concerning the crew of that misfortunate vessel. However, Mrs. Malcolm
+was a woman of great faith, and having placed her reliance on Him who is
+the orphan’s stay and widow’s trust, she resigned her bairn into his
+hands, with a religious submission to his pleasure, though the mother’s
+tear of weak human nature was on her cheek and in her e’e. And her faith
+was well rewarded, for the vessel brought him safe home, and he had seen
+such a world of things, that it was just to read a story-book to hear him
+tell of Elsineur and Gottenburg, and other fine and great places that we
+had never heard of till that time; and he brought me a bottle of Riga
+balsam, which for healing cuts was just miraculous, besides a clear
+bottle of Rososolus for his mother, a spirit which for cordiality could
+not be told; for though since that time we have had many a sort of
+Dantzic cordial, I have never tasted any to compare with Robin Malcolm’s
+Rososolus. The Lady Macadam, who had a knowledge of such things,
+declared it was the best of the best sort; for Mrs. Malcolm sent her
+ladyship some of it in a doctor’s bottle, as well as to Mrs. Balwhidder,
+who was then at the downlying with our daughter Janet—a woman now in the
+married state, that makes a most excellent wife, having been brought up
+with great pains, and well educated, as I shall have to record by-and-by.
+
+About the Christmas of this year, Lady Macadam’s son having been
+perfected in the art of war at a school in France, had, with the help of
+his mother’s friends, and his father’s fame, got a stand of colours in
+the Royal Scots regiment; he came to show himself in his regimentals to
+his lady mother, like a dutiful son, as he certainly was. It happened
+that he was in the kirk in his scarlets and gold, on the same Sunday that
+Robert Malcolm came home from the long voyage to Norway for deals; and I
+thought when I saw the soldier and the sailor from the pulpit, that it
+was an omen of war, among our harmless country folks, like swords and
+cannon amidst ploughs and sickles, coming upon us; and I became laden in
+spirit, and had a most weighty prayer upon the occasion, which was long
+after remembered, many thinking, when the American war broke out, that I
+had been gifted with a glimmering of prophecy on that day.
+
+It was during this visit to his lady mother, that young Laird Macadam
+settled the correspondence with Kate Malcolm, which, in the process of
+time, caused us all so much trouble; for it was a clandestine concern:
+but the time is not yet ripe for me to speak of it more at large. I
+should, however, mention, before concluding this annal, that Mrs. Malcolm
+herself was this winter brought to death’s door by a terrible host that
+came on her in the kirk, by taking a kittling in her throat. It was a
+terrification to hear her sometimes; but she got the better of it in the
+spring, and was more herself thereafter than she had been for years
+before; and her daughter Effie or Euphemia, as she was called by Miss
+Sabrina, the schoolmistress, was growing up to be a gleg and clever
+quean; she was, indeed, such a spirit in her way, that the folks called
+her Spunkie; while her son William, that was the youngest of the five,
+was making a wonderful proficiency with Mr. Lorimore. He was indeed a
+douce, well-doing laddie, of a composed nature; insomuch that the master
+said he was surely chosen for the ministry. In short, the more I think
+on what befell this family, and of the great meekness and Christian worth
+of the parent, I verily believe there never could have been in any parish
+such a manifestation of the truth, that they who put their trust in the
+Lord, are sure of having a friend that will never forsake them.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI
+YEAR 1770
+
+
+THIS blessed Ann. Dom. was one of the Sabbaths of my ministry. When I
+look back upon it, all is quiet and good order: the darkest cloud of the
+smuggling had passed over, at least from my people, and the rumours of
+rebellion in America were but like the distant sound of the bars of Ayr.
+We sat, as it were, in a lown and pleasant place, beholding our
+prosperity, like the apple-tree adorned with her garlands of flourishes,
+in the first fair mornings of the spring, when the birds were returning
+thanks to their Maker for the coming again of the seed-time, and the busy
+bee goeth forth from her cell, to gather honey from the flowers of the
+field, and the broom of the hill, and the blue-bells and gowans, which
+Nature, with a gracious and a gentle hand, scatters in the valley, as she
+walketh forth in her beauty, to testify to the goodness of the Father of
+all mercies.
+
+Both at the spring and the harvest sacraments, the weather was as that
+which is in Paradise; there was a glad composure in all hearts, and the
+minds of men were softened towards each other. The number of
+communicants was greater than had been known for many years, and the
+tables were filled by the pious from many a neighbouring parish: those of
+my hearers who had opposed my placing, declared openly, for a testimony
+of satisfaction and holy thankfulness, that the tent, so surrounded as it
+was on both occasions, was a sight they never had expected to see. I
+was, to be sure, assisted by some of the best divines then in the land,
+but I had not been a sluggard myself in the vineyard.
+
+Often, when I think on this year, so fruitful in pleasant intimacies, has
+the thought come into my mind, that as the Lord blesses the earth from
+time to time with a harvest of more than the usual increase, so, in like
+manner, he is sometimes for a season pleased to pour into the breasts of
+mankind a larger portion of good-will and charity, disposing them to love
+one another, to be kindly to all creatures, and filled with the delight
+of thankfulness to himself, which is the greatest of blessings.
+
+It was in this year that the Earl of Eaglesham ordered the fair to be
+established in the village; and it was a day of wonderful festivity to
+all the bairns, and lads and lassies, for miles round. I think, indeed,
+that there has never been such a fair as the first since; for although we
+have more mountebanks and merry-andrews now, and richer cargoes of
+groceries and packman’s stands, yet there has been a falling off in the
+light-hearted daffing, while the hobleshows in the change-houses have
+been awfully augmented. It was on this occasion that Punch’s opera was
+first seen in our country side, and surely never was there such a funny
+curiosity; for although Mr. Punch himself was but a timber idol, he was
+as droll as a true living thing, and napped with his head so comical; but
+oh! he was a sorrowful contumacious captain, and it was just a sport to
+see how he rampaged, and triumphed, and sang. For months after, the
+laddie weans did nothing but squeak and sing like Punch. In short, a
+blithe spirit was among us throughout this year, and the briefness of the
+chronicle bears witness to the innocency of the time.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII
+YEAR 1771
+
+
+IT was in this year that my troubles with Lady Macadam’s affair began.
+She was a woman, as I have by hint here and there intimated, of a
+prelatic disposition, seeking all things her own way, and not overly
+scrupulous about the means, which I take to be the true humour of
+prelacy. She was come of a high episcopal race in the east country,
+where sound doctrine had been long but little heard, and she considered
+the comely humility of a presbyter as the wickedness of hypocrisy; so
+that, saving in the way of neighbourly visitation, there was no sincere
+communion between us. Nevertheless, with all her vagaries, she had the
+element of a kindly spirit, that would sometimes kythe in actions of
+charity, that showed symptoms of a true Christian grace, had it been
+properly cultivated; but her morals had been greatly neglected in her
+youth, and she would waste her precious time in the long winter nights,
+playing at the cards with her visitors; in the which thriftless and
+sinful pastime, she was at great pains to instruct Kate Malcolm, which I
+was grieved to understand. What, however, I most misliked in her
+ladyship, was a lightness and juvenility of behaviour altogether
+unbecoming her years; for she was far past three-score, having been long
+married without children. Her son, the soldier officer, came so late,
+that it was thought she would have been taken up as an evidence in the
+Douglas cause. She was, to be sure, crippled with the rheumatics, and no
+doubt the time hung heavy on her hands; but the best friends of
+recreation and sport must allow, that an old woman, sitting whole hours
+jingling with that paralytic chattel a spinnet, was not a natural object!
+What, then, could be said for her singing Italian songs, and getting all
+the newest from Vauxhall in London, a boxful at a time, with new
+novel-books, and trinkum-trankum flowers and feathers, and sweetmeats,
+sent to her by a lady of the blood royal of Paris? As for the music, she
+was at great pains to instruct Kate, which, with the other things she
+taught, were sufficient, as my lady said herself, to qualify poor Kate
+for a duchess or a governess, in either of which capacities, her ladyship
+assured Mrs. Malcolm, she would do honour to her instructor, meaning her
+own self; but I must come to the point anent the affair.
+
+One evening, early in the month of January, as I was sitting by myself in
+my closet studying the _Scots Magazine_, which I well remember the new
+number had come but that very night, Mrs. Balwhidder being at the time
+busy with the lasses in the kitchen, and superintending, as her custom
+was, for she was a clever woman, a great wool-spinning we then had, both
+little wheel and meikle wheel, for stockings and blankets—sitting, as I
+was saying, in the study, with the fire well gathered up, for a night’s
+reflection, a prodigious knocking came to the door, by which the book was
+almost startled out of my hand, and all the wheels in the house were
+silenced at once. This was her ladyship’s flunkey, to beg me to go to
+her, whom he described as in a state of desperation. Christianity
+required that I should obey the summons; so, with what haste I could,
+thinking that perhaps, as she had been low-spirited for some time about
+the young laird’s going to the Indies, she might have got a cast of
+grace, and been wakened in despair to the state of darkness in which she
+had so long lived, I made as few steps of the road between the manse and
+her house as it was in my ability to do.
+
+On reaching the door, I found a great light in the house—candles burning
+up stairs and down stairs, and a sough of something extraordinar going
+on. I went into the dining-room, where her ladyship was wont to sit; but
+she was not there—only Kate Malcolm all alone, busily picking bits of
+paper from the carpet. When she looked up, I saw that her eyes were red
+with weeping, and I was alarmed, and said, “Katy, my dear, I hope there
+is no danger?” Upon which the poor lassie rose, and, flinging herself in
+a chair, covered her face with her hands, and wept bitterly.
+
+“What is the old fool doing with the wench?” cried a sharp angry voice
+from the drawing-room—“why does not he come to me?” It was the voice of
+Lady Macadam herself, and she meant me. So I went to her; but, oh! she
+was in a far different state from what I had hoped. The pride of this
+world had got the upper hand of her, and was playing dreadful antics with
+understanding. There was she, painted like a Jezebel, with gum-flowers
+on her head, as was her custom every afternoon, sitting on a settee, for
+she was lame, and in her hand she held a letter. “Sir,” said she, as I
+came into the room, “I want you to go instantly to that young fellow,
+your clerk, (meaning Mr. Lorimore, the schoolmaster, who was likewise
+session-clerk and precentor,) and tell him I will give him a couple of
+hundred pounds to marry Miss Malcolm without delay, and undertake to
+procure him a living from some of my friends.”
+
+“Softly, my lady, you must first tell me the meaning of all this haste of
+kindness,” said I, in my calm methodical manner. At the which she began
+to cry and sob, like a petted bairn, and to bewail her ruin, and the
+dishonour of her family. I was surprised, and beginning to be
+confounded; at length out it came. The flunkey had that night brought
+two London letters from the Irville post, and Kate Malcolm being out of
+the way when he came home, he took them both in to her ladyship on the
+silver server, as was his custom; and her ladyship, not jealousing that
+Kate could have a correspondence with London, thought both the letters
+were for herself, for they were franked; so, as it happened, she opened
+the one that was for Kate, and this, too, from the young laird, her own
+son. She could not believe her eyes when she saw the first words in his
+hand of write; and she read, and she better read, till she read all the
+letter, by which she came to know that Kate and her darling were trysted,
+and that this was not the first love-letter which had passed between
+them. She, therefore, tore it in pieces, and sent for me, and screamed
+for Kate; in short, went, as it were, off at the head, and was neither to
+bind nor to hold on account of this intrigue, as she, in her wrath,
+stigmatised the innocent gallanting of poor Kate and the young laird.
+
+I listened in patience to all she had to say anent the discovery, and
+offered her the very best advice; but she derided my judgment; and
+because I would not speak outright to Mr. Lorimore, and get him to marry
+Kate off hand, she bade me good-night with an air, and sent for him
+herself. He, however, was on the brink of marriage with his present
+worthy helpmate, and declined her ladyship’s proposals, which angered her
+still more. But although there was surely a great lack of discretion in
+all this, and her ladyship was entirely overcome with her passion, she
+would not part with Kate, nor allow her to quit the house with me, but
+made her sup with her as usual that night, calling her sometimes a
+perfidious baggage, and at other times, forgetting her delirium, speaking
+to her as kindly as ever. At night, Kate as usual helped her ladyship
+into her bed, (this she told me with tears in her eyes next morning;) and
+when Lady Macadam, as was her wont, bent to kiss her for good-night, she
+suddenly recollected “the intrigue,” and gave Kate such a slap on the
+side of the head, as quite dislocated for a time the intellects of the
+poor young lassie. Next morning, Kate was solemnly advised never to
+write again to the laird, while the lady wrote him a letter, which, she
+said, would be as good as a birch to the breech of the boy. Nothing,
+therefore, for some time, indeed, throughout the year, came of the
+matter; but her ladyship, when Mrs. Balwhidder soon after called on her,
+said that I was a nose-of-wax, and that she never would speak to me
+again, which surely was not a polite thing to say to Mrs. Balwhidder, my
+second wife.
+
+This stramash was the first time I had interposed in the family concerns
+of my people; for it was against my nature to make or meddle with private
+actions saving only such as in course of nature came before the session;
+but I was not satisfied with the principles of Lady Macadam, and I began
+to be weary about Kate Malcolm’s situation with her ladyship, whose ways
+of thinking I saw were not to be depended on, especially in those things
+wherein her pride and vanity were concerned. But the time ran on—the
+butterflies and the blossoms were succeeded by the leaves and the fruit,
+and nothing of a particular nature farther molested the general
+tranquillity of this year; about the end of which, there came on a sudden
+frost, after a tack of wet weather. The roads were just a sheet of ice,
+like a frozen river; insomuch that the coal-carts could not work; and one
+of our cows, (Mrs. Balwhidder said, after the accident, it was our best;
+but it was not so much thought of before,) fell in coming from the glebe
+to the byre, and broke its two hinder legs, which obligated us to kill
+it, in order to put the beast out of pain. As this happened after we had
+salted our mart, it occasioned us to have a double crop of puddings, and
+such a show of hams in the kitchen, as was a marvel to our visitors to
+see.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII
+YEAR 1772
+
+
+ON New-Year’s night, this year, a thing happened, which, in its own
+nature, was a trifle; but it turned out as a mustard-seed that grows into
+a great tree. One of the elders, who has long been dead and gone, came
+to the manse about a fact that was found out in the clachan, and after we
+had discoursed on it some time, he rose to take his departure. I went
+with him to the door with the candle in my hand—it was a clear frosty
+night, with a sharp wind; and the moment I opened the door, the blast
+blew out the candle, so that I heedlessly, with the candlestick in my
+hand, walked with him to the yett without my hat, by which I took a sore
+cold in my head, that brought on a dreadful toothache; insomuch, that I
+was obligated to go into Irville to get the tooth drawn, and this caused
+my face to swell to such a fright, that, on the Sabbath-day, I could not
+preach to my people. There was, however, at that time, a young man, one
+Mr. Heckletext, tutor in Sir Hugh Montgomerie’s family, and who had
+shortly before been licensed. Finding that I would not be able to preach
+myself, I sent to him, and begged he would officiate for me, which he
+very pleasantly consented to do, being, like all the young clergy,
+thirsting to show his light to the world. ’Twixt the fore and
+afternoon’s worship, he took his check of dinner at the manse, and I
+could not but say that he seemed both discreet and sincere. Judge,
+however, what was brewing, when the same night Mr. Lorimore came and told
+me, that Mr. Heckletext was the suspected person anent the fact that had
+been instrumental, in the hand of a chastising Providence, to afflict me
+with the toothache, in order, as it afterwards came to pass, to bring the
+hidden hypocrisy of the ungodly preacher to light. It seems that the
+donsie lassie who was in fault, had gone to the kirk in the afternoon,
+and seeing who was in the pulpit, where she expected to see me, was
+seized with the hysterics, and taken with her crying on the spot, the
+which being untimely, proved the death of both mother and bairn, before
+the thing was properly laid to the father’s charge.
+
+ [Picture: The Precentor]
+
+This caused a great uproar in the parish. I was sorely blamed to let
+such a man as Mr. Heckletext go up into my pulpit, although I was as
+ignorant of his offences as the innocent child that perished; and, in an
+unguarded hour, to pacify some of the elders, who were just distracted
+about the disgrace, I consented to have him called before the session.
+He obeyed the call, and in a manner that I will never forget; for he was
+a sorrow of sin and audacity, and demanded to know why, and for what
+reason, he was summoned. I told him the whole affair in my calm and
+moderate way; but it was oil cast upon a burning coal. He flamed up in a
+terrible passion; threepit at the elders that they had no proof whatever
+of his having had any trafficking in the business, which was the case;
+for it was only a notion, the poor deceased lassie never having made a
+disclosure: called them libellous conspirators against his character,
+which was his only fortune, and concluded by threatening to punish them,
+though he exempted me from the injury which their slanderous insinuations
+had done to his prospects in life. We were all terrified, and allowed
+him to go away without uttering a word; and sure enough he did bring a
+plea in the courts of Edinburgh against Mr. Lorimore and the elders for
+damages, laid at a great sum.
+
+What might have been the consequence, no one can tell; but soon after he
+married Sir Hugh’s house-keeper, and went with her into Edinburgh, where
+he took up a school; and, before the trial came on, that is to say,
+within three months of the day that I myself married them, Mrs.
+Heckletext was delivered of a thriving lad bairn, which would have been a
+witness for the elders, had the worst come to the worst. This was,
+indeed, we all thought, a joyous deliverance to the parish, and it was a
+lesson to me never to allow any preacher to mount my pulpit, unless I
+knew something of his moral character.
+
+In other respects, this year passed very peaceably in the parish: there
+was a visible increase of worldly circumstances, and the hedges which had
+been planted along the toll-road, began to put forth their branches, and
+to give new notions of orderlyness and beauty to the farmers. Mrs.
+Malcolm heard from time to time from her son Charles, on board the
+man-of-war the _Avenger_, where he was midshipman; and he had found a
+friend in the captain, that was just a father to him. Her second son,
+Robert, being out of his time at Irville, went to the Clyde to look for a
+berth, and was hired to go to Jamaica, in a ship called the _Trooper_.
+He was a lad of greater sobriety of nature than Charles; douce, honest,
+and faithful; and when he came home, though he brought no limes to me to
+make punch, like his brother, he brought a Muscovy duck to Lady Macadam,
+who had, as I have related, in a manner educated his sister Kate. That
+duck was the first of the kind we had ever seen, and many thought it was
+of the goose species, only with short bowly legs. It was, however, a
+tractable and homely beast; and after some confabulation, as my lady
+herself told Mrs. Balwhidder, it was received into fellowship by her
+other ducks and poultry. It is not, however, so much on account of the
+rarity of the creature, that I have introduced it here, as for the
+purpose of relating a wonderful operation that was performed on it by
+Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress.
+
+There happened to be a sack of beans in our stable, and Lady Macadam’s
+hens and fowls, which were not overly fed at home through the inattention
+of her servants, being great stravaigers for their meat, in passing the
+door went in to pick, and the Muscovy, seeing a hole in the bean-sack,
+dabbled out a crapful before she was disturbed. The beans swelled on the
+poor bird’s stomach, and her crap bellied out like the kyte of a Glasgow
+magistrate, until it was just a sight to be seen with its head back on
+its shoulders. The bairns of the clachan followed it up and down,
+crying, the lady’s muckle jock’s aye growing bigger, till every heart was
+wae for the creature. Some thought it was afflicted with a tympathy, and
+others, that it was the natural way for such-like ducks to cleck their
+young. In short, we were all concerned; and my lady, having a great
+opinion of Miss Sabrina’s skill, had a consultation with her on the case,
+at which Miss Sabrina advised, that what she called the Cæsarean
+operation should be tried, which she herself performed accordingly, by
+opening the creature’s crap, and taking out as many beans as filled a
+mutchkin stoup, after which she sewed it up, and the Muscovy went its way
+to the water-side, and began to swim, and was as jocund as ever;
+insomuch, that in three days after it was quite cured of all the
+consequences of its surfeit.
+
+I had at one time a notion to send an account of this to the _Scots
+Magazine_, but something always came in the way to prevent me; so that it
+has been reserved for a place in this chronicle, being, after Mr.
+Heckletext’s affair, the most memorable thing in our history of this
+year.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV
+YEAR 1773
+
+
+IN this Ann. Dom. there was something like a plea getting to a head,
+between the session and some of the heritors, about a new school-house;
+the thatch having been torn from the rigging of the old one by a blast of
+wind, on the first Monday of February, by which a great snow storm got
+admission, and the school was rendered utterly uninhabitable. The
+smaller sort of lairds were very willing to come into the plan with an
+extra contribution, because they respected the master, and their bairns
+were at the school; but the gentlemen, who had tutors in their own
+houses, were not so manageable; and some of them even went so far as to
+say, that the kirk, being only wanted on Sunday, would do very well for a
+school all the rest of the week, which was a very profane way of
+speaking; and I was resolved to set myself against any such thing, and to
+labour, according to the power and efficacy of my station, to get a new
+school built.
+
+Many a meeting the session had on the subject; and the heritors debated,
+and discussed, and revised their proceedings, and still no money for the
+needful work was forthcoming. Whereupon it happened one morning, as I
+was rummaging in my scrutoire, that I laid my hand on the Lord
+Eaglesham’s letter anent Charles Malcolm; and it was put into my head at
+that moment, that if I was to write to his lordship, who was the greatest
+heritor, and owned now the major part of the parish, that by his help and
+influence I might be an instrument to the building of a comfortable new
+school. Accordingly, I sat down and wrote my lord all about the
+accident, and the state of the school-house, and the divisions and
+seditions among the heritors, and sent the letter to him at London by the
+post the same day, without saying a word to any living soul on the
+subject.
+
+This in me was an advised thought; for, by the return of post, his
+lordship with his own hand, in a most kind manner, authorized me to say
+that he would build a new school at his own cost, and bade me go over and
+consult about it with his steward at the castle, to whom he had written
+by the same post the necessary instructions. Nothing could exceed the
+gladness which the news gave to the whole parish, and none said more in
+behalf of his lordship’s bounty and liberality than the heritors;
+especially those gentry who grudged the undertaking, when it was thought
+that it would have to come out of their own pock-nook.
+
+In the course of the summer, just as the roof was closing in of the
+school-house, my lord came to the castle with a great company, and was
+not there a day till he sent for me to come over, on the next Sunday, to
+dine with him; but I sent him word that I could not do so, for it would
+be a transgression of the Sabbath, which made him send his own gentleman,
+to make his apology for having taken so great a liberty with me, and to
+beg me to come on the Monday, which I accordingly did, and nothing could
+be better than the discretion with which I was used. There was a vast
+company of English ladies and gentlemen, and his lordship, in a most
+jocose manner, told them all how he had fallen on the midden, and how I
+had clad him in my clothes, and there was a wonder of laughing and
+diversion; but the most particular thing in the company, was a large,
+round-faced man, with a wig, that was a dignitary in some great
+Episcopalian church in London, who was extraordinary condescending
+towards me, drinking wine with me at the table, and saying weighty
+sentences, in a fine style of language, about the becoming grace of
+simplicity and innocence of heart, in the clergy of all denominations of
+Christians, which I was pleased to hear; for really he had a proud red
+countenance, and I could not have thought he was so mortified to humility
+within, had I not heard with what sincerity he delivered himself, and
+seen how much reverence and attention was paid to him by all present,
+particularly by my lord’s chaplain, who was a pious and pleasant young
+divine, though educated at Oxford for the Episcopalian persuasion.
+
+One day, soon after, as I was sitting in my closet conning a sermon for
+the next Sunday, I was surprised by a visit from the dean, as the
+dignitary was called. He had come, he said, to wait on me as rector of
+the parish—for so, it seems, they call a pastor in England—and to say,
+that, if it was agreeable, he would take a family dinner with us before
+he left the castle. I could make no objection to this kindness; but said
+I hoped my lord would come with him, and that we would do our best to
+entertain them with all suitable hospitality. About an hour or so after
+he had returned to the castle, one of the flunkeys brought a letter from
+his lordship, to say, that not only he would come with the dean, but that
+they would bring his other guests with them; and that, as they could only
+drink London wine, the butler would send me a hamper in the morning,
+assured, as he was pleased to say, that Mrs. Balwhidder would otherwise
+provide good cheer.
+
+This notification, however, was a great trouble to my wife, who was only
+used to manufacture the produce of our glebe and yard to a profitable
+purpose, and not used to the treatment of deans and lords, and other
+persons of quality. However, she was determined to stretch a point on
+this occasion; and we had, as all present declared, a charming dinner;
+for fortunately one of the sows had a litter of pigs a few days before,
+and in addition to a goose, that is but a boss bird, we had a roasted pig
+with an apple in its mouth, which was just a curiosity to see; and my
+lord called it a tithe pig; but I told him it was one of Mrs.
+Balwhidder’s own clecking, which saying of mine made no little sport when
+expounded to the dean.
+
+But, och how! this was the last happy summer that we had for many a year
+in the parish; and an omen of the dule that ensued, was in a sacrilegious
+theft that a daft woman, Jenny Gaffaw, and her idiot daughter, did in the
+kirk, by tearing off and stealing the green serge lining of my lord’s
+pew, to make, as they said, a hap for their shoulders in the cold
+weather—saving, however, the sin, we paid no attention at the time to the
+mischief and tribulation that so unheard-of a trespass boded to us all.
+It took place about Yule, when the weather was cold and frosty, and poor
+Jenny was not very able to go about seeking her meat as usual. The deed,
+however, was mainly done by her daughter, who, when brought before me,
+said, “her poor mother’s back had mair need of claes than the
+kirk-boards;” which was so true a thing, that I could not punish her, but
+wrote anent it to my lord, who not only overlooked the offence, but sent
+orders to the servants at the castle to be kind to the poor woman, and
+the natural, her daughter.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XV
+YEAR 1774
+
+
+WHEN I look back on this year, and compare what happened therein with the
+things that had gone before, I am grieved to the heart, and pressed down
+with an afflicted spirit. We had, as may be read, trials and
+tribulations in the days that were past; and in the rank and boisterous
+times of the smuggling there was much sin and blemish among us, but
+nothing so dark and awful as what fell out in the course of this unhappy
+year. The evil omen of daft Jenny Gaffaw and her daughter’s sacrilege,
+had soon a bloody verification.
+
+About the beginning of the month of March in this year, the war in
+America was kindling so fast that the government was obligated to send
+soldiers over the sea, in the hope to quell the rebellious temper of the
+plantations; and a party of a regiment that was quartered at Ayr was
+ordered to march to Greenock, to be there shipped off. The men were wild
+and wicked profligates, without the fear of the Lord before their eyes;
+and some of them had drawn up with light women in Ayr, who followed them
+on their march. This the soldiers did not like, not wishing to be
+troubled with such gear in America; so the women, when they got the
+length of Kilmarnock, were ordered to retreat and go home, which they all
+did but one Jean Glaikit, who persisted in her intent to follow her joe,
+Patrick O’Neil, a Catholic Irish corporal. The man did, as he said, all
+in his capacity to persuade her to return, but she was a contumacious
+limmer, and would not listen to reason; so that, in passing along our
+toll-road, from less to more, the miserable wretches fell out, and
+fought, and the soldier put an end to her with a hasty knock on the head
+with his firelock, and marched on after his comrades.
+
+The body of the woman was, about half an hour after, found by the
+scholars of Mr. Lorimore’s school, who had got the play to see the
+marching, and to hear the drums of the soldiers. Dreadful was the shout
+and the cry throughout the parish at this foul work. Some of the farmer
+lads followed the soldiers on horseback, and others ran to Sir Hugh, who
+was a justice of the peace, for his advice.—Such a day as that was!
+
+However, the murderer was taken, and, with his arms tied behind him with
+a cord, he was brought back to the parish, where he confessed before Sir
+Hugh the deed, and how it happened. He was then put in a cart, and,
+being well guarded by six of the lads, was taken to Ayr jail.
+
+It was not long after this that the murderer was brought to trial, and,
+being found guilty on his own confession, he was sentenced to be
+executed, and his body to be hung in chains near the spot where the deed
+was done. I thought that all in the parish would have run to desperation
+with horror when the news of this came, and I wrote immediately to the
+Lord Eaglesham to get this done away by the merciful power of the
+government, which he did, to our great solace and relief.
+
+In the autumn, the young Laird Macadam, being ordered with his regiment
+for the Americas, got leave from the king to come and see his lady
+mother, before his departure. But it was not to see her only, as will
+presently appear.
+
+Knowing how much her ladyship was averse to the notion he had of Kate
+Malcolm, he did not write of his coming, lest she would send Kate out of
+the way, but came in upon them at a late hour, as they were wasting their
+precious time, as was the nightly wont of my lady, with a pack of cards;
+and so far was she from being pleased to see him, that no sooner did she
+behold his face, but, like a tap of tow, she kindled upon both him and
+Kate, and ordered them out of her sight and house. The young folk had
+discretion: Kate went home to her mother, and the laird came to the
+manse, and begged us to take him in. He then told me what had happened;
+and that, having bought a captain’s commission, he was resolved to marry
+Kate, and hoped I would perform the ceremony, if her mother would
+consent. “As for mine,” said he, “she will never agree; but, when the
+thing is done, her pardon will not be difficult to get; for, with all her
+whims and caprice, she is generous and affectionate.” In short, he so
+wiled and beguiled me, that I consented to marry them, if Mrs. Malcolm
+was agreeable. “I will not disobey my mother,” said he, “by asking her
+consent, which I know she will refuse; and, therefore, the sooner it is
+done the better.” So we then stepped over to Mrs. Malcolm’s house, where
+we found that saintly woman, with Kate and Effie, and Willie, sitting
+peacefully at their fireside, preparing to read their Bibles for the
+night. When we went in, and when I saw Kate, that was so ladylike there,
+with the decent humility of her parent’s dwelling, I could not but think
+she was destined for a better station; and when I looked at the captain,
+a handsome youth, I thought surely their marriage is made in heaven; and
+so I said to Mrs. Malcolm, who after a time consented, and likewise
+agreed that her daughter should go with the captain to America; for her
+faith and trust in the goodness of Providence was great and boundless,
+striving, as it were, to be even with its tender mercies. Accordingly,
+the captain’s man was sent to bid the chaise wait that had taken him to
+the lady’s, and the marriage was sanctified by me before we left Mrs.
+Malcolm’s. No doubt, they ought to have been proclaimed three several
+Sabbaths; but I satisfied the session, at our first meeting, on account
+of the necessity of the case. The young couple went in the chaise
+travelling to Glasgow, authorising me to break the matter to Lady
+Macadam, which was a sore task; but I was spared from the performance.
+For her ladyship had come to herself, and thinking on her own rashness in
+sending away Kate and the captain in the way she had done, she was like
+one by herself. All the servants were scattered out and abroad in quest
+of the lovers; and some of them, seeing the chaise drive from Mrs.
+Malcolm’s door with them in it, and me coming out, jealoused what had
+been done, and told their mistress outright of the marriage, which was to
+her like a clap of thunder; insomuch that she flung herself back in her
+settee, and was beating and drumming with her heels on the floor, like a
+madwoman in Bedlam, when I entered the room. For some time she took no
+notice of me, but continued her din; but, by-and-by, she began to turn
+her eyes in fiery glances upon me, till I was terrified lest she would
+fly at me with her claws in her fury. At last she stopped all at once,
+and in a calm voice, said, “But it cannot now be helped, where are the
+vagabonds?”—“They are gone,” replied I.—“Gone?” cried she, “gone
+where?”—“To America, I suppose,” was my answer; upon which she again
+threw herself back in the settee, and began again to drum and beat with
+her feet as before. But not to dwell on small particularities, let it
+suffice to say, that she sent her coachman on one of her coach horses,
+which, being old and stiff, did not overtake the fugitives till they were
+in their bed at Kilmarnock, where they stopped that night; but when they
+came back to the lady’s in the morning, she was as cagey and meikle taken
+up with them, as if they had gotten her full consent and privilege to
+marry from the first. Thus was the first of Mrs. Malcolm’s children well
+and creditably settled. I have only now to conclude with observing, that
+my son Gilbert was seized with the smallpox about the beginning of
+December, and was blinded by them for seventeen days; for the inoculation
+was not in practice yet among us, saving only in the genteel families
+that went into Edinburgh for the education of their children, where it
+was performed by the faculty there.
+
+ [Picture: Kate]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVI
+YEAR 1775
+
+
+THE regular course of nature is calm and orderly, and tempests and
+troubles are but lapses from the accustomed sobriety with which
+Providence works out the destined end of all things. From Yule till
+Pace-Monday there had been a gradual subsidence of our personal and
+parochial tribulations, and the spring, though late, set in bright and
+beautiful, and was accompanied with the spirit of contentment; so that,
+excepting the great concern that we all began to take in the American
+rebellion, especially on account of Charles Malcolm that was in the
+man-of-war, and of Captain Macadam that had married Kate, we had
+throughout the better half of the year but little molestation of any
+sort. I should, however, note the upshot of the marriage.
+
+By some cause that I do not recollect, if I ever had it properly told,
+the regiment wherein the captain had bought his commission was not sent
+to the plantations, but only over to Ireland, by which the captain and
+his lady were allowed to prolong their stay in the parish with his
+mother; and he, coming of age while he was among us, in making a
+settlement on his wife, bought the house at the Braehead, which was then
+just built by Thomas Shivers the mason, and he gave that house, with a
+judicious income, to Mrs. Malcolm, telling her that it was not becoming,
+he having it in his power to do the contrary, that she should any longer
+be dependent on her own industry. For this the young man got a name like
+a sweet odour in all the country side; but that whimsical and prelatic
+lady his mother, just went out of all bounds, and played such pranks for
+an old woman, as cannot be told. To her daughter-in-law, however, she
+was wonderful kind; and, in fitting her out for going with the captain to
+Dublin, it was extraordinary to hear what a paraphernalia she provided
+her with. But who could have thought that in this kindness a sore trial
+was brewing for me!
+
+It happened that Miss Betty Wudrife, the daughter of an heritor, had been
+on a visit to some of her friends in Edinburgh; and being in at
+Edinburgh, she came out with a fine mantle, decked and adorned with many
+a ribbon-knot, such as had never been seen in the parish. The Lady
+Macadam, hearing of this grand mantle, sent to beg Miss Betty to lend it
+to her, to make a copy for young Mrs. Macadam. But Miss Betty was so
+vogie with her gay mantle, that she sent back word, it would be making it
+o’er common; which so nettled the old courtly lady, that she vowed
+revenge, and said the mantle would not be long seen on Miss Betty.
+Nobody knew the meaning of her words; but she sent privately for Miss
+Sabrina, the schoolmistress, who was aye proud of being invited to my
+lady’s, where she went on the Sabbath night to drink tea, and read
+Thomson’s _Seasons_ and Hervey’s _Meditations_ for her ladyship’s
+recreation. Between the two, a secret plot was laid against Miss Betty
+and her Edinburgh mantle; and Miss Sabrina, in a very treacherous manner,
+for the which I afterwards chided her severely, went to Miss Betty, and
+got a sight of the mantle, and how it was made, and all about it, until
+she was in a capacity to make another like it; by which my lady and her,
+from old silk and satin negligées which her ladyship had worn at the
+French court, made up two mantles of the selfsame fashion as Miss
+Betty’s, and, if possible, more sumptuously garnished, but in a flagrant
+fool way. On the Sunday morning after, her ladyship sent for Jenny
+Gaffaw, and her daft daughter Meg, and showed them the mantles, and said
+she would give then half-a-crown if they would go with them to the kirk,
+and take their place in the bench beside the elders, and, after worship,
+walk home before Miss Betty Wudrife. The two poor natural things were
+just transported with the sight of such bravery, and needed no other
+bribe; so, over their bits of ragged duds, they put on the pageantry, and
+walked away to the kirk like peacocks, and took their place on the bench,
+to the great diversion of the whole congregation.
+
+I had no suspicion of this, and had prepared an affecting discourse about
+the horrors of war, in which I touched, with a tender hand, on the
+troubles that threatened families and kindred in America; but all the
+time I was preaching, doing my best, and expatiating till the tears came
+into my eyes, I could not divine what was the cause of the inattention of
+my people. But the two vain haverels were on the bench under me, and I
+could not see them; where they sat, spreading their feathers and picking
+their wings, stroking down and setting right their finery; with such an
+air as no living soul could see and withstand; while every eye in the
+kirk was now on them, and now at Miss Betty Wudrife, who was in a worse
+situation than if she had been on the stool of repentance.
+
+Greatly grieved with the little heed that was paid to my discourse, I
+left the pulpit with a heavy heart; but when I came out into the
+kirkyard, and saw the two antics linking like ladies, and aye keeping in
+the way before Miss Betty, and looking back and around in their pride and
+admiration, with high heads and a wonderful pomp, I was really overcome,
+and could not keep my gravity, but laughed loud out among the graves, and
+in the face of all my people; who, seeing how I was vanquished in that
+unguarded moment by my enemy, made a universal and most unreverent breach
+of all decorum, at which Miss Betty, who had been the cause of all, ran
+into the first open door, and almost fainted away with mortification.
+
+This affair was regarded by the elders as a sinful trespass on the
+orderlyness that was needful in the Lord’s house; and they called on me
+at the manse that night, and said it would be a guilty connivance if I
+did not rebuke and admonish Lady Macadam of the evil of her way; for they
+had questioned daft Jenny, and had got at the bottom of the whole plot
+and mischief. But I, who knew her ladyship’s light way, would fain have
+had the elders to overlook it, rather than expose myself to her tantrums;
+but they considered the thing as a great scandal, so I was obligated to
+conform to their wishes. I might, however, have as well stayed at home,
+for her ladyship was in one of her jocose humours when I went to speak to
+her on the subject; and it was so far from my power to make a proper
+impression on her of the enormity that had been committed, that she made
+me laugh, in spite of my reason, at the fantastical drollery of her
+malicious prank on Miss Betty Wudrife.
+
+It, however, did not end here; for the session, knowing that it was
+profitless to speak to the daft mother and daughter, who had been the
+instruments, gave orders to Willy Howking, the betheral, not to let them
+again so far into the kirk; and Willy, having scarcely more sense than
+them both, thought proper to keep them out next Sunday altogether. The
+twa said nothing at the time, but the adversary was busy with them; for,
+on the Wednesday following, there being a meeting of the synod at Ayr, to
+my utter amazement the mother and daughter made their appearance there in
+all their finery, and raised a complaint against me and the session, for
+debarring them from church privileges. No stage play could have produced
+such an effect. I was perfectly dumfoundered; and every member of the
+synod might have been tied with a straw, they were so overcome with this
+new device of that endless woman, when bent on provocation—the Lady
+Macadam; in whom the saying was verified, that old folk are twice bairns;
+for in such plays, pranks, and projects, she was as playrife as a very
+lassie at her sampler; and this is but a swatch to what lengths she would
+go. The complaint was dismissed, by which the session and me were
+assoilzied; but I’ll never forget till the day of my death what I
+suffered on that occasion, to be so put to the wall by two born idiots.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVII
+YEAR 1776
+
+
+IT belongs to the chroniclers of the realm to describe the damage and
+detriment which fell on the power and prosperity of the kingdom, by
+reason of the rebellion, that was fired into open war, against the name
+and authority of the king in the plantations of America; for my task is
+to describe what happened within the narrow bound of the pasturage of the
+Lord’s flock, of which, in his bounty and mercy, he made me the humble,
+willing, but alas! the weak and ineffectual shepherd.
+
+About the month of February, a recruiting party came to our neighbour
+town of Irville, to beat up for men to be soldiers against the rebels;
+and thus the battle was brought, as it were, to our gates; for the very
+first man that took on with them was one Thomas Wilson, a cottar in our
+clachan, who, up to that time, had been a decent and creditable
+character. He was at first a farmer lad, but had forgathered with a
+doited tawpy, whom he married, and had offspring three or four. For some
+time it was noticed that he had a down and thoughtful look, that his
+cleeding was growing bare, and that his wife kept an untrig house, which,
+it was feared by many, was the cause of Thomas going o’er often to the
+change-house; he was, in short, during the greater part of the winter,
+evidently a man foregone in the pleasures of this world, which made all
+that knew him compassionate his situation.
+
+No doubt, it was his household ills that burdened him past bearing, and
+made him go into Irville, when he heard of the recruiting, and take on to
+be a soldier. Such a wally-wallying as the news of this caused at every
+door; for the red-coats—from the persecuting days, when the black-cuffs
+rampaged through the country—soldiers that fought for hire were held in
+dread and as a horror among us, and terrible were the stories that were
+told of their cruelty and sinfulness; indeed, there had not been wanting
+in our time a sample of what they were, as witness the murder of Jean
+Glaikit by Patrick O’Neil, the Irish corporal, anent which I have treated
+at large in the memorables of the year 1774.
+
+A meeting of the session was forthwith held; for here was Thomas Wilson’s
+wife and all his weans, an awful cess, thrown upon the parish; and it was
+settled outright among us, that Mr. Docken, who was then an elder, but is
+since dead, a worthy man, with a soft tongue and a pleasing manner,
+should go to Irville, and get Thomas, if possible, released from the
+recruiters. But it was all in vain; the sergeant would not listen to
+him, for Thomas was a strapping lad; nor would the poor infatuated man
+himself agree to go back, but cursed like a cadger, and swore that, if he
+stayed any longer among his plagues, he would commit some rash act; so we
+were saddled with his family, which was the first taste and preeing of
+what war is when it comes into our hearths, and among the breadwinners.
+
+The evil, however, did not stop here. Thomas, when he was dressed out in
+the king’s clothes, came over to see his bairns, and take a farewell of
+his friends, and he looked so gallant, that the very next market-day
+another lad of the parish listed with him; but he was a ramplor, roving
+sort of a creature, and, upon the whole, it was thought he did well for
+the parish when he went to serve the king.
+
+The listing was a catching distemper. Before the summer was over, the
+other three of the farming lads went off with the drum, and there was a
+wailing in the parish, which made me preach a touching discourse. I
+likened the parish to a widow woman with a small family, sitting in her
+cottage by the fireside, herself spinning with an eident wheel, ettling
+her best to get them a bit and a brat, and the poor weans all canty about
+the hearthstane—the little ones at their playocks, and the elder at their
+tasks—the callans working with hooks and lines to catch them a meal of
+fish in the morning—and the lassies working stockings to sell at the next
+Marymas fair.—And then I likened war to a calamity coming among them—the
+callans drowned at their fishing—the lassies led to a misdoing—and the
+feckless wee bairns laid on the bed of sickness, and their poor forlorn
+mother sitting by herself at the embers of a cauldrife fire; her tow
+done, and no a bodle to buy more; drooping a silent and salt tear for her
+babies, and thinking of days that war gone, and, like Rachel weeping for
+her children, she would not be comforted. With this I concluded, for my
+own heart filled full with the thought, and there was a deep sob in the
+Church; verily it was Rachel weeping for her children.
+
+In the latter end of the year, the man-of-war, with Charles Malcolm in
+her, came to the tail of the Bank at Greenock, to press men as it was
+thought, and Charles got leave from his captain to come and see his
+mother; and he brought with him Mr. Howard, another midshipman, the son
+of a great parliament man in London, which, as we have tasted the sorrow,
+gave us some insight into the pomp of war, Charles was now grown up into
+a fine young man, rattling, light-hearted, and just a cordial of
+gladness, and his companion was every bit like him. They were dressed in
+their fine gold-laced garbs and nobody knew Charles when he came to the
+clachan, but all wondered, for they were on horseback, and rode to the
+house where his mother lived when he went away, but which was then
+occupied by Miss Sabrina and her school. Miss Sabrina had never seen
+Charles, but she had heard of him; and when he enquired for his mother,
+she guessed who he was, and showed him the way to the new house that the
+captain had bought for her.
+
+Miss Sabrina, who was a little overly perjink at times, behaved herself
+on this occasion with a true spirit, and gave her lassies the play
+immediately; so that the news of Charles’s return was spread by them like
+wildfire, and there was a wonderful joy in the whole town. When Charles
+had seen his mother, and his sister Effie, with that douce and
+well-mannered lad William, his brother—for of their meeting I cannot
+speak, not being present—he then came with his friend to see me at the
+manse, and was most jocose with me, and, in a way of great pleasance, got
+Mrs. Balwhidder to ask his friend to sleep at the manse. In short, we
+had just a ploy the whole two days they stayed with us, and I got leave
+from Lord Eaglesham’s steward to let them shoot on my lord’s land; and I
+believe every laddie wean in the parish attended them to the field. As
+for old Lady Macadam, Charles being, as she said, a near relation, and
+she having likewise some knowledge of his comrade’s family, she was just
+in her element with them, though they were but youths; for she a woman
+naturally of a fantastical, and, as I have narrated, given to comical
+devices, and pranks to a degree. She made for them a ball, to which she
+invited all the bonniest lassies, far and near, in the parish, and was
+out of the body with mirth, and had a fiddler from Irville; and it was
+thought by those that were there, that had she not been crippled with the
+rheumatics, she would have danced herself. But I was concerned to hear
+both Charles and his friend, like hungry hawks, rejoicing at the prospect
+of the war, hoping thereby, as soon as their midship term was out, to be
+made lieutenants; saving this, there was no allay in the happiness they
+brought with them to the parish, and it was a delight to see how auld and
+young of all degrees made of Charles; for we were proud of him, and none
+more than myself, though he began to take liberties with me, calling me
+old governor; it was, however, in a warm-hearted manner, only I did not
+like it when any of the elders heard. As for his mother, she deported
+herself like a saint on the occasion. There was a temperance in the
+pleasure of her heart, and in her thankfulness, that is past the compass
+of words to describe. Even Lady Macadam, who never could think a serious
+thought all her days, said, in her wild way that the gods had bestowed
+more care in the making of Mrs. Malcolm’s temper, than on the bodies and
+souls of all the saints in the calendar. On the Sunday the strangers
+attended divine worship, and I preached a sermon purposely for them, and
+enlarged at great length and fulness on how David overcame Goliath; and
+they both told me that they had never heard such a good discourse; but I
+do not think they were great judges of preachings. How, indeed, could
+Mr. Howard know anything of sound doctrine, being educated, as he told
+me, at Eton school, a prelatic establishment! Nevertheless, he was a
+fine lad; and though a little given to frolic and diversion, he had a
+principle of integrity, that afterwards kythed into much virtue; for,
+during this visit, he took a notion of Effie Malcolm, and the lassie of
+him, then a sprightly and blooming creature, fair to look upon, and
+blithe to see; and he kept up a correspondence with her till the war was
+over, when being a captain of a frigate, he came down among us, and they
+were married by me, as shall be related in its proper place.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVIII
+YEAR 1777
+
+
+THIS may well be called the year of the heavy heart, for we had sad
+tidings of the lads that went away as soldiers to America. First, there
+was a boding in the minds of all their friends that they were never to
+see them more; and their sadness, like a mist spreading from the waters
+and covering the fields, darkened the spirit of the neighbours.
+Secondly, a sound was bruited about that the king’s forces would have a
+hot and a sore struggle before the rebels were put down, if they were
+ever put down. Then came the cruel truth of all that the poor lads’
+friends had feared. But it is fit and proper that I should relate at
+length, under their several heads, the sorrows and afflictions as they
+came to pass.
+
+One evening, as I was taking my walk alone, meditating my discourse for
+the next Sabbath—it was shortly after Candlemas—it was a fine clear
+frosty evening, just as the sun was setting. Taking my walk alone, and
+thinking of the dreadfulness of Almighty power, and how that, if it was
+not tempered and restrained by infinite goodness, and wisdom, and mercy,
+the miserable sinner, man, and all things that live, would be in a woeful
+state, I drew near the beild where old Widow Mirkland lived by herself,
+who was grand-mother to Jock Hempy, the ramplor lad, that was the second
+who took on for a soldier. I did mind of this at the time; but, passing
+the house, I heard the croon, as it were, of a laden soul busy with the
+Lord, and, not to disturb the holy workings of grace, I paused and
+listened. It was old Mizy Mirkland herself, sitting at the gable of the
+house, looking at the sun setting in all his glory behind the Arran
+hills; but she was not praying—only moaning to herself—an oozing out, as
+it might be called, of the spirit from her heart, then grievously
+oppressed with sorrow, and heavy bodements of grey hairs and
+poverty.—“Yonder it slips awa’,” she was saying, “and my poor bairn,
+that’s o’er the seas in America, is maybe looking on its bright face,
+thinking of his hame, and aiblins of me, that did my best to breed him up
+in the fear of the Lord; but I couldna warsle wi’ what was ordained. Ay,
+Jock! as ye look at the sun gaun down, as many a time, when ye were a wee
+innocent laddie at my knee here, I hae bade ye look at him as a type of
+your Maker, ye will hae a sore heart; for ye hae left me in my need, when
+ye should hae been near at hand to help me, for the hard labour and
+industry with which I brought you up. But it’s the Lord’s will. Blessed
+be the name of the Lord, that makes us to thole the tribulations of this
+world, and will reward us, through the mediation of Jesus, hereafter.”
+She wept bitterly as she said this, for her heart was tried, but the
+blessing of a religious contentment was shed upon her; and I stepped up
+to her, and asked about her concerns, for, saving as a parishioner, and a
+decent old woman, I knew little of her. Brief was her story; but it was
+one of misfortune.—“But I will not complain,” she said, “of the measure
+that has been meted unto me. I was left myself an orphan; when I grew
+up, and was married to my gude-man, I had known but scant and want. Our
+days of felicity were few; and he was ta’en awa’ from me shortly after my
+Mary was born. A wailing baby, and a widow’s heart, was a’ he left me.
+I nursed her with my salt tears, and bred her in straits; but the favour
+of God was with us, and she grew up to womanhood as lovely as the rose,
+and as blameless as the lily. In her time she was married to a farming
+lad. There never was a brawer pair in the kirk, than on that day when
+they gaed there first as man and wife. My heart was proud, and it
+pleased the Lord to chastise my pride—to nip my happiness, even in the
+bud. The very next day he got his arm crushed. It never got well again;
+and he fell into a decay, and died in the winter, leaving my Mary far on
+in the road to be a mother.
+
+ [Picture: A morning consultation]
+
+“When her time drew near, we both happened to be working in the yard.
+She was delving to plant potatoes, and I told her it would do her hurt;
+but she was eager to provide something, as she said, for what might
+happen. Oh! it was an ill-omened word. The same night her trouble came
+on, and before the morning she was a cauld corpse, and another wee wee
+fatherless baby was greeting at my bosom—it was him that’s noo awa’ in
+America. He grew up to be a fine bairn, with a warm heart, but a light
+head, and, wanting the rein of a father’s power upon him, was no sa douce
+as I could have wished; but he was no man’s foe save his own. I thought,
+and hoped, as he grew to years of discretion, he would have sobered, and
+been a consolation to my old age; but he’s gone, and he’ll never come
+back—disappointment is my portion in this world, and I have no hope;
+while I can do, I will seek no help, but threescore and fifteen can do
+little, and a small ail is a great evil to an aged woman, who has but the
+distaff for her breadwinner.”
+
+I did all that I could to bid her be of good cheer, but the comfort of a
+hopeful spirit was dead within her; and she told me, that by many tokens
+she was assured her bairn was already slain.—“Thrice,” said she, “I have
+seen his wraith—the first time he was in the pride of his young manhood,
+the next he was pale and wan, with a bloody and gashy wound in his side,
+and the third time there was a smoke, and, when it cleared away, I saw
+him in a grave, with neither winding-sheet nor coffin.”
+
+The tale of this pious and resigned spirit dwelt in mine ear, and, when I
+went home, Mrs. Balwhidder thought that I had met with an o’ercome, and
+was very uneasy; so she got the tea soon ready to make me better; but
+scarcely had we tasted the first cup when a loud lamentation was heard in
+the kitchen. This was from that tawpy the wife of Thomas Wilson, with
+her three weans. They had been seeking their meat among the farmer
+houses, and, in coming home, forgathered on the road with the Glasgow
+carrier, who told them that news had come, in the _London Gazette_, of a
+battle, in which the regiment that Thomas had listed in was engaged, and
+had suffered loss both in rank and file; none doubting that their head
+was in the number of the slain, the whole family grat aloud, and came to
+the manse, bewailing him as no more; and it afterwards turned out to be
+the case, making it plain to me that there is a farseeing discernment in
+the spirit, that reaches beyond the scope of our incarnate senses.
+
+But the weight of the war did not end with these afflictions; for,
+instead of the sorrow that the listing caused, and the anxiety after, and
+the grief of the bloody tidings, operating as wholesome admonition to our
+young men, the natural perversity of the human heart was more and more
+manifested. A wonderful interest was raised among us all to hear of what
+was going on in the world; insomuch, that I myself was no longer
+contented with the relation of the news of the month in the _Scots
+Magazine_, but joined with my father-in-law, Mr. Kibbock, to get a
+newspaper twice a-week from Edinburgh. As for Lady Macadam, who being
+naturally an impatient woman, she had one sent to her three times a-week
+from London, so that we had something fresh five times every week; and
+the old papers were lent out to the families who had friends in the wars.
+This was done on my suggestion, hoping it would make all content with
+their peaceable lot; but dominion for a time had been given to the power
+of contrariness, and it had quite an opposite effect. It begot a
+curiosity, egging on to enterprise; and, greatly to my sorrow, three of
+the brawest lads in the parish, or in any parish, all in one day took on
+with a party of the Scots Greys that were then lying in Ayr; and nothing
+would satisfy the callans at Mr. Lorimore’s school, but, instead of their
+innocent plays with girs, and shinties, and sicklike, they must go
+ranking like soldiers, and fight sham-fights in bodies. In short, things
+grew to a perfect hostility, for a swarm of weans came out from the
+schools of Irville on a Saturday afternoon, and, forgathering with ours,
+they had a battle with stones on the toll-road, such as was dreadful to
+hear of; for many a one got a mark that day he will take to the grave
+with him.
+
+It was not, however, by accidents of the field only, that we were
+afflicted; those of the flood, too, were sent likewise against us. In
+the month of October, when the corn was yet in the holms, and on the cold
+land by the river side, the water of Irville swelled to a great spait,
+from bank to brae, sweeping all before it, and roaring, in its might,
+like an agent of divine displeasure, sent forth to punish the inhabitants
+of the earth. The loss of the victual was a thing reparable, and those
+that suffered did not greatly complain; for, in other respects, their
+harvest had been plenteous: but the river, in its fury, not content with
+overflowing the lands, burst through the sandy hills with a raging force,
+and a riving asunder of the solid ground, as when the fountains of the
+great deep were broken up. All in the parish was a-foot, and on the
+hills, some weeping and wringing their hands, not knowing what would
+happen, when they beheld the landmarks of the waters deserted, and the
+river breaking away through the country, like the war-horse set loose in
+his pasture, and glorying in his might. By this change in the way and
+channel of the river, all the mills in our parish were left more than
+half a mile from dam or lade; and the farmers through the whole winter,
+till the new mills were built, had to travel through a heavy road with
+their victual, which was a great grievance, and added not a little to the
+afflictions of this unhappy year, which to me were not without a
+particularity, by the death of a full cousin of Mrs. Balwhidder, my first
+wife; she was grievously burnt by looting over a candle. Her mutch,
+which was of the high structure then in vogue, took fire, and being
+fastened with corking-pins to a great toupee, it could not be got off
+until she had sustained a deadly injury, of which, after lingering long,
+she was kindly eased by her removal from trouble. This sore accident was
+to me a matter of deep concern and cogitation; but as it happened in
+Tarbolton, and no in our parish, I have only alluded to it to show, that
+when my people were chastised by the hand of Providence, their pastor was
+not spared, but had a drop from the same vial.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIX
+YEAR 1778
+
+
+THIS year was as the shadow of the bygane: there was less actual
+suffering, but what we came through cast a gloom among us, and we did not
+get up our spirits till the spring was far advanced; the corn was in the
+ear, and the sun far towards midsummer height, before there was any
+regular show of gladness in the parish.
+
+It was clear to me that the wars were not to be soon over; for I noticed,
+in the course of this year, that there was a greater christening of lad
+bairns than had ever been in any year during my incumbency; and grave and
+wise persons, observant of the signs of the times, said, that it had been
+long held as a sure prognostication of war, when the births of male
+children outnumbered that of females.
+
+Our chief misfortune in this year was a revival of that wicked mother of
+many mischiefs, the smuggling trade, which concerned me greatly; but it
+was not allowed to it to make any thing like a permanent stay among us,
+though in some of the neighbouring parishes, its ravages, both in morals
+and property, were very distressing, and many a mailing was sold to pay
+for the triumphs of the cutters and gaugers; for the government was by
+this time grown more eager, and the war caused the king’s ships to be out
+and about, which increased the trouble of the smugglers, whose wits in
+their turn were thereby much sharpened.
+
+After Mrs. Malcolm, by the settlement of Captain Macadam, had given up
+her dealing, two maiden women, that were sisters, Betty and Janet Pawkie,
+came in among us from Ayr, where they had friends in league with some of
+the laigh land folk, that carried on the contraband with the Isle of Man,
+which was the very eye of the smuggling. They took up the tea-selling,
+which Mrs. Malcolm had dropped, and did business on a larger scale,
+having a general huxtry, with parliament-cakes, and candles, and
+pincushions, as well as other groceries, in their window. Whether they
+had any contraband dealings, or were only back-bitten, I cannot take it
+upon me to say; but it was jealoused in the parish that the meal in the
+sacks, that came to their door at night, and was sent to the Glasgow
+market in the morning, was not made of corn. They were, however, decent
+women, both sedate and orderly; the eldest, Betty Pawkie, was of a manly
+stature, and had a long beard, which made her have a coarse look; but she
+was, nevertheless, a worthy, well-doing creature, and at her death she
+left ten pounds to the poor of the parish, as may be seen in the
+mortification board that the session put up in the kirk as a
+testification and an example.
+
+Shortly after the revival of the smuggling, an exciseman was put among
+us, and the first was Robin Bicker, a very civil lad that had been a
+flunkey with Sir Hugh Montgomerie, when he was a residenter in Edinburgh,
+before the old Sir Hugh’s death. He was a queer fellow, and had a coothy
+way of getting in about folk, the which was very serviceable to him in
+his vocation; nor was he overly gleg: but when a job was ill done, and he
+was obliged to notice it, he would often break out on the smugglers for
+being so stupid, so that for an exciseman he was wonderful well liked,
+and did not object to a waught of brandy at a time; when the auld wives
+ca’d it well-water. It happened, however, that some unneighbourly person
+sent him notice of a clecking of tea chests, or brandy kegs, at which
+both Jenny and Betty Pawkie were the howdies. Robin could not but
+therefore enter their house; however, before going in, he just cried at
+the door to somebody on the road, so as to let the twa industrious
+lassies hear he was at hand. They were not slack in closing the
+trance-door, and putting stoups and stools behind it, so as to cause
+trouble, and give time before any body could get in. They then emptied
+their chaff-bed, and filled the tikeing with tea, and Betty went in on
+the top, covering herself with the blanket, and graining like a woman in
+labour. It was thought that Robin Bicker himself would not have been
+overly particular in searching the house, considering there was a woman
+seemingly in the death-thraws; but a sorner, an incomer from the east
+country, and that hung about the change-house as a divor hostler, that
+would rather gang a day’s journey in the dark than turn a spade in
+day-light, came to him as he stood at the door, and went in with him to
+see the sport. Robin, for some reason, could not bid him go away, and
+both Betty and Janet were sure he was in the plot against them; indeed,
+it was always thought he was an informer, and no doubt he was something
+not canny, for he had a down look.
+
+It was some time before the doorway was cleared of the stoups and stools,
+and Jenny was in great concern, and flustered, as she said, for her poor
+sister, who was taken with a heart-colic. “I’m sorry for her,” said
+Robin, “but I’ll be as quiet as possible;” and so he searched all the
+house, but found nothing; at the which his companion, the divor east
+country hostler, swore an oath that could not be misunderstood; so,
+without more ado, but as all thought against the grain, Robin went up to
+sympathize with Betty in the bed, whose groans were loud and vehement.
+“Let me feel your pulse,” said Robin, and he looted down as she put forth
+her arm from aneath the clothes, and laying his hand on the bed, cried,
+“Hey! what’s this? this is a costly filling.” Upon which Betty jumpet up
+quite recovered, and Jenny fell to the wailing and railing, while the
+hostler from the east country took the bed of tea on his back, to carry
+it to the change-house, till a cart was gotten to take it into the
+custom-house at Irville.
+
+Betty Pawkie being thus suddenly cured, and grudging the loss of
+property, took a knife in her hand, and as the divor was crossing the
+burn at the stepping-stones that lead to the back of the change-house,
+she ran after him and ripped up the tikeing, and sent all the tea
+floating away on the burn, which was thought a brave action of Betty, and
+the story not a little helped to lighten our melancholy meditations.
+
+Robin Bicker was soon after this affair removed to another district, and
+we got in his place one Mungo Argyle, who was as proud as a provost,
+being come of Highland parentage. Black was the hour he came among my
+people; for he was needy and greedy, and rode on the top of his
+commission. Of all the manifold ills in the train of smuggling, surely
+the excisemen are the worst, and the setting of this rabiator over us was
+a severe judgment for our sins. But he suffered for’t, and peace be with
+him in the grave, where the wicked cease from troubling!
+
+Willie Malcolm, the youngest son of his mother, had by this time learned
+all that Mr. Lorimore, the schoolmaster, could teach; and as it was
+evidenced to every body, by his mild manners and saintliness of
+demeanour, that he was a chosen vessel, his mother longed to fulfil his
+own wish, which was doubtless the natural working of the act of grace
+that had been shed upon him; but she had not the wherewithal to send him
+to the college of Glasgow, where he was desirous to study, and her just
+pride would not allow her to cess his brother-in-law, the Captain
+Macadam, whom, I should now mention, was raised in the end of this year,
+as we read in the newspapers, to be a major. I thought her in this
+somewhat unreasonable, for she would not be persuaded to let me write to
+the captain; but when I reflected on the good that Willie Malcolm might
+in time do as a preacher, I said nothing more to her, but indited a
+letter to the Lord Eaglesham, setting forth the lad’s parts, telling who
+he was and all about his mother’s scruples; and, by the retour of the
+post from London his lordship sent me an order on his steward, to pay me
+twenty pounds towards equipping my protegée, as he called Willie, with a
+promise to pay for his education, which was such a great thing for his
+lordship to do off-hand on my recommendation, that it won much affection
+throughout the country side; and folks began to wonder, rehearsing the
+great things, as was said, that I had gotten my lord at different times,
+and on divers occasions, to do, which had a vast of influence among my
+brethren of the presbytery, and they grew into a state of greater
+cordiality with me, looking on me as a man having authority; but I was
+none thereat lifted up, for not being gifted with the power of a
+kirk-filling eloquence, I was but little sought for at sacraments, and
+fasts, and solemn days, which was doubtless well ordained; for I had no
+motive to seek fame in foreign pulpits, but was left to walk in the paths
+of simplicity within my own parish. To eschew evil myself, and to teach
+others to do the same, I thought the main duties of the pastoral office,
+and with a sincere heart endeavoured what in me lay to perform them with
+meekness, sobriety, and a spirit wakeful to the inroads of sin and Satan.
+But oh, the sordiness of human nature!—The kindness of the Lord
+Eaglesham’s own disposition was ascribed to my influence, and many a dry
+answer I was obliged to give to applicants that would have me trouble his
+lordship, as if I had a claim upon him. In the ensuing year, the notion
+of my cordiality with him came to a great head, and brought about an
+event, that could not have been forethought by me as a thing within the
+compass of possibility to bring to pass.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XX
+YEAR 1779
+
+
+I WAS named in this year for the General Assembly, and Mrs. Balwhidder,
+by her continual thrift, having made our purse able to stand a shake
+against the wind, we resolved to go into Edinburgh in a creditable
+manner. Accordingly, in conjunct with Mrs. Dalrymple, the lady of a
+major of that name, we hired the Irville chaise, and we put up in
+Glasgow, at the Black Boy, where we stayed all night. Next morning, by
+seven o’clock, we got into a fly-coach for the capital of Scotland, which
+we reached after a heavy journey about the same hour in the evening, and
+put up at the public where it stopped till the next day; for really both
+me and Mrs. Balwhidder were worn out with the undertaking, and found a
+cup of tea a vast refreshment.
+
+Betimes, in the morning, having taken our breakfast, we got a caddy to
+guide us and our wallise to Widow M‘Vicar’s, at the head of the
+Covenanters’ Close. She was a relation to my first wife, Betty Lanshaw,
+my own full cousin that was, and we had advised her, by course of post,
+of our coming, and intendment to lodge with her as uncos and strangers.
+But Mrs. M‘Vicar kept a cloth shop, and sold plaidings and flannels,
+besides Yorkshire superfines, and was used to the sudden incoming of
+strangers, especially visitants, both from the West and the North
+Highlands, and was withal a gawsy furthy woman, taking great pleasure in
+hospitality, and every sort of kindliness and discretion. She would not
+allow of such a thing as our being lodgers in her house, but was so cagey
+to see us, and to have it in her power to be civil to a minister, as she
+was pleased to say, of such repute, that nothing less would content her
+but that we must live upon her, and partake of all the best that could be
+gotten for us within the walls of “the gude town.”
+
+When we found ourselves so comfortable, Mrs. Balwhidder and me waited on
+my patron’s family that was, the young ladies, and the laird, who had
+been my pupil, but was now an advocate high in the law. They likewise
+were kind also. In short, every body in Edinburgh were in a manner
+wearisome kind, and we could scarcely find time to see the Castle and the
+palace of Holyrood-house, and that more sanctified place, where the
+Maccabeus of the Kirk of Scotland, John Knox, was wont to live.
+
+Upon my introduction to his grace the Commissioner, I was delighted and
+surprised to find the Lord Eaglesham at the levee, and his lordship was
+so glad on seeing me, that he made me more kenspeckle than I could have
+wished to have been in his grace’s presence; for, owing to the same, I
+was required to preach before his grace, upon a jocose recommendation of
+his lordship; the which gave me great concern, and daunted me so that in
+the interim I was almost bereft of all peace and studious composure of
+mind. Fain would I have eschewed the honour that was thus thrust upon
+me; but both my wife and Mrs. M‘Vicar were just lifted out of themselves
+with the thought.
+
+When the day came, I thought all things in this world were loosened from
+their hold, and that the sure and steadfast earth itself was grown coggly
+beneath my feet, as I mounted the pulpit. With what sincerity I prayed
+for help that day! and never stood man more in need of it; for through
+all my prayer the congregation was so watchful and still, doubtless to
+note if my doctrine was orthodox, that the beating of my heart might have
+been heard to the uttermost corners of the kirk.
+
+I had chosen as my text, from Second Samuel, xixth chapter and 35th
+verse, these words—“Can I hear any more the voice of singing men and
+singing women? Wherefore, then, should thy servant be yet a burden to
+the king?” And hardly had I with a trembling voice read the words, when
+I perceived an awful stir in the congregation; for all applied the words
+to the state of the church, and the appointment of his grace the
+Commissioner. Having paused after giving out the text, the same fearful
+and critical silence again ensued, and every eye was so fixed upon me,
+that I was for a time deprived of courage to look about; but heaven was
+pleased to compassionate my infirmity, and as I proceeded, I began to
+warm as in my own pulpit. I described the gorgeous Babylonian harlot
+riding forth in her chariots of gold and silver, with trampling steeds
+and a hurricane of followers, drunk with the cup of abominations, all
+shouting with revelry, and glorying in her triumph, treading down in
+their career those precious pearls, the saints and martyrs, into the mire
+beneath their swinish feet. “Before her you may behold Wantonness
+playing the tinkling cymbal, Insolence beating the drum, and Pride
+blowing the trumpet. Every vice is there with his emblems; and the
+seller of pardons, with his crucifix and triple crown, is distributing
+his largess of perdition. The voices of men shout to set wide the gates,
+to give entrance to the queen of nations, and the gates are set wide, and
+they all enter. The avenging gates close on them—they are all shut up in
+hell.”
+
+There was a sough in the kirk as I said these words; for the vision I
+described seemed to be passing before me as I spoke, and I felt as if I
+had witnessed the everlasting destruction of Antichrist, and the
+worshippers of the Beast. But soon recovering myself, I said in a soft
+and gentle manner, “Look at yon lovely creature in virgin-raiment, with
+the Bible in her hand. See how mildly she walks along, giving alms to
+the poor as she passes on towards the door of that lowly dwelling—Let us
+follow her in—She takes her seat in the chair at the bedside of the poor
+old dying sinner; and as he tosses in the height of penitence and
+despair, she reads to him the promise of the Saviour—‘This night thou
+shalt be with me in Paradise;’ and he embraces her with transports, and,
+falling back on his pillow, calmly closes his eyes in peace. She is the
+true religion; and when I see what she can do even in the last moments of
+the guilty, well may we exclaim, when we think of the symbols and
+pageantry of the departed superstition, Can I hear any more the voice of
+singing men and singing women? No; let us cling to the simplicity of the
+Truth that is now established in our native land.”
+
+At the conclusion of this clause of my discourse, the congregation, which
+had been all so still and so solemn, never coughing, as was often the
+case among my people, gave a great rustle, changing their positions, by
+which I was almost overcome; however, I took heart and ventured on, and
+pointed out that, with our Bible and an orthodox priesthood, we stood in
+no need of the king’s authority, however bound we were, in temporal
+things, to respect it; and I showed this at some length, crying out in
+the words of my text, “Wherefore, then, should thy servant be yet a
+burden to the king?” in the saying of which I happened to turn my eyes
+towards his grace the Commissioner, as he sat on the throne, and I
+thought his countenance was troubled, which made me add, that he might
+not think I meant him any offence, “That the King of the Church was one
+before whom the great, and the wise, and the good—all doomed and
+sentenced convicts—implore his mercy.” “It is true,” said I, “that in
+the days of his tribulation he was wounded for our iniquities, and died
+to save us; but, at his death, his greatness was proclaimed by the quick
+and the dead. There was sorrow, and there was wonder, and there was
+rage, and there was remorse; but there was no shame there—none blushed on
+that day at that sight but yon glorious luminary.” The congregation
+rose, and looked round, as the sun that I pointed at shone in at the
+window. I was disconcerted by their movement, and my spirit was spent,
+so that I could say no more.
+
+When I came down from the pulpit, there was a great pressing in of
+acquaintance and ministers, who lauded me exceedingly; but I thought it
+could be only in derision, therefore I slipped home to Mrs. M‘Vicar’s as
+fast as I could.
+
+Mrs. M‘Vicar, who was a clever, hearing-all sort of a neighbour, said my
+sermon was greatly thought of, and that I had surprised everybody; but I
+was fearful there was something of jocularity at the bottom of this, for
+she was a flaunty woman, and liked well to give a good-humoured gibe or
+jeer. However, his grace the Commissioner was very thankful for the
+discourse, and complimented me on what he called my apostolical
+earnestness; but he was a courteous man, and I could not trust to him,
+especially as my lord Eaglesham had told me in secrecy before—it’s true,
+it was in his gallanting way—that, in speaking of the king’s servant as I
+had done, I had rather gone beyond the bounds of modern moderation.
+Altogether, I found neither pleasure nor profit in what was thought so
+great an honour, but longed for the privacy of my own narrow pasture, and
+little flock.
+
+It was in this visit to Edinburgh that Mrs. Balwhidder bought her silver
+teapot, and other ornamental articles; but this was not done, as she
+assured me, in a vain spirit of bravery, which I could not have abided,
+but because it was well known that tea draws better in a silver pot, and
+drinks pleasanter in a china cup, than out of any other kind of cup or
+teapot.
+
+By the time I got home to the manse, I had been three whole weeks and
+five days absent, which was more than all my absences together, from the
+time of my placing; and my people were glowing with satisfaction when
+they saw us driving in a Glasgow chaise through the clachan to the manse.
+
+The rest of the year was merely a quiet succession of small incidents,
+none of which are worthy of notation, though they were all severally, no
+doubt, of aught somewhere, as they took us both time and place in the
+coming to pass, and nothing comes to pass without helping onwards to some
+great end; each particular little thing that happens in the world being a
+seed sown by the hand of Providence to yield an increase, which increase
+is destined, in its turn, to minister to some higher purpose, until at
+last the issue affects the whole earth. There is nothing in all the
+world that doth not advance the cause of goodness; no, not even the sins
+of the wicked, though, through the dim casement of her mortal tabernacle,
+the soul of man cannot discern the method thereof.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXI
+YEAR 1780
+
+
+THIS was, among ourselves, another year of few events. A sound, it is
+true, came among us of a design, on the part of the government in London,
+to bring back the old harlotry of papistry; but we spent our time in the
+lea of the hedge, and the lown of the hill. Some there were that a panic
+seized upon when they heard of Lord George Gordon, that zealous
+Protestant, being committed to the Tower; but for my part, I had no
+terror upon me, for I saw all things around me going forward improving;
+and I said to myself, it is not so when Providence permits scathe and
+sorrow to fall upon a nation. Civil troubles, and the casting down of
+thrones, is always forewarned by want and poverty striking the people.
+What I have, therefore, chiefly to record as the memorables of this year,
+are things of small import—the main of which are, that some of the
+neighbouring lairds, taking example by Mr. Kibbock, my father-in-law that
+was, began in this fall to plant the tops of their hills with mounts of
+fir-trees; and Mungo Argyle, the exciseman, just herried the poor
+smugglers to death, and made a power of prize-money, which, however, had
+not the wonted effect of riches, for it brought him no honour; and he
+lived in the parish like a leper, or any other kind of excommunicated
+person.
+
+But I should not forget a most droll thing that took place with Jenny
+Gaffaw, and her daughter. They had been missed from the parish for some
+days, and folk began to be uneasy about what could have become of the two
+silly creatures; till one night, at the dead hour, a strange light was
+seen beaming and burning at the window of the bit hole where they lived.
+It was first observed by Lady Macadam, who never went to bed at any
+Christian hour, but sat up reading her new French novels and play-books
+with Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress. She gave the alarm, thinking that
+such a great and continuous light from a lone house, where never candle
+had been seen before, could be nothing less than the flame of a burning.
+And sending Miss Sabrina and the servants to see what was the matter,
+they beheld daft Jenny, and her as daft daughter, with a score of candle
+doups, (Heaven only knows where they got them!) placed in the window, and
+the twa fools dancing, and linking, and admiring before the door.
+“What’s all this about, Jenny,” said Miss Sabrina.—“Awa’ wi’ you, awa’
+wi’ you—ye wicked pope, ye whore of Babylon—is na it for the glory of
+God, and the Protestant religion? d’ye think I will be a pope as long as
+light can put out darkness?”—And with that the mother and daughter began
+again to leap and dance as madly as before.
+
+It seems that poor Jenny, having heard of the luminations that were
+lighted up through the country on the ending of the Popish Bill, had,
+with Meg, travelled by themselves into Glasgow, where they had gathered
+or begged a stock of candles, and coming back under the cloud of night,
+had surprised and alarmed the whole clachan, by lighting up their window
+in the manner that I have described. Poor Miss Sabrina, at Jenny’s
+uncivil salutation, went back to my lady with her heart full, and would
+fain have had the idiots brought to task before the session, for what
+they had said to her. But I would not hear tell of such a thing, for
+which Miss Sabrina owed me a grudge that was not soon given up. At the
+same time, I was grieved to see the testimonies of joyfulness for a holy
+victory, brought into such disrepute by the ill-timed demonstrations of
+the two irreclaimable naturals, that had not a true conception of the
+cause for which they were triumphing.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXII
+YEAR 1781
+
+
+IF the two last years passed o’er the heads of me and my people without
+any manifest dolour, which is a great thing to say for so long a period
+in this world, we had our own trials and tribulations in the one of which
+I have now to make mention. Mungo Argyle, the exciseman, waxing rich,
+grew proud and petulant, and would have ruled the country side with a rod
+of iron. Nothing less would serve him than a fine horse to ride on, and
+a world of other conveniences and luxuries, as if he had been on an
+equality with gentlemen. And he bought a grand gun, which was called a
+fowling-piece; and he had two pointer dogs, the like of which had not
+been seen in the parish since the planting of the Eaglesham-wood on the
+moorland, which was four years before I got the call. Every body said
+the man was fey; and truly, when I remarked him so gallant and gay on the
+Sabbath at the kirk, and noted his glowing face and gleg een, I thought
+at times there was something no canny about him. It was indeed clear to
+be seen, that the man was hurried out of himself; but nobody could have
+thought that the death he was to dree would have been what it was.
+
+About the end of summer my Lord Eaglesham came to the castle, bringing
+with him an English madam, that was his Miss. Some days after he came
+down from London, as he was riding past the manse, his lordship stopped
+to enquire for my health, and I went to the door to speak to him. I
+thought that he did not meet me with that blithe countenance he was wont,
+and in going away, he said with a blush, “I fear I dare not ask you to
+come to the castle.” I had heard of his concubine, and I said, “In
+saying so, my lord, you show a spark of grace; for it would not become me
+to see what I have heard; and I am surprised, my lord, you will not
+rather take a lady of your own.” He looked kindly, but confused, saying,
+he did not know where to get one; so seeing his shame, and not wishing to
+put him out of conceit entirely with himself, I replied, “Na, na, my
+lord, there’s nobody will believe that, for there never was a silly Jock,
+but there was as silly a Jenny,” at which he laughed heartily, and rode
+away. But I know not what was in’t; I was troubled in mind about him,
+and thought, as he was riding away, that I would never see him again; and
+sure enough it so happened; for the next day, being airing in his coach
+with Miss Spangle, the lady he had brought, he happened to see Mungo
+Argyle with his dogs and his gun, and my lord being as particular about
+his game as the other was about boxes of tea and kegs of brandy, he
+jumped out of the carriage, and ran to take the gun. Words passed, and
+the exciseman shot my lord. Never shall I forget that day; such riding,
+such running, the whole country side afoot; but the same night my lord
+breathed his last; and the mad and wild reprobate that did the deed was
+taken up and sent off to Edinburgh. This was a woeful riddance of that
+oppressor, for my lord was a good landlord and a kind-hearted man; and
+albeit, though a little thoughtless, was aye ready to make his power,
+when the way was pointed out, minister to good works. The whole parish
+mourned for him, and there was not a sorer heart in all its bounds than
+my own. Never was such a sight seen as his burial: the whole country
+side was there, and all as solemn as if they had been assembled in the
+valley of Jehoshaphat in the latter day. The hedges where the funeral
+was to pass were clad with weans, like bunches of hips and haws, and the
+kirkyard was as if all its own dead were risen. Never, do I think, was
+such a multitude gathered together. Some thought there could not be less
+than three thousand grown men, besides women and children.
+
+Scarcely was this great public calamity past, for it could be reckoned no
+less, when one Saturday afternoon, as Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress,
+was dining with Lady Macadam, her ladyship was stricken with the
+paralytics, and her face so thrown in the course of a few minutes, that
+Miss Sabrina came flying to the manse for the help and advice of Mrs.
+Balwhidder. A doctor was gotten with all speed by express; but her
+ladyship was smitten beyond the reach of medicine. She lived, however,
+some time after; but oh! she was such an object, that it was a grief to
+see her. She could only mutter when she tried to speak, and was as
+helpless as a baby. Though she never liked me, nor could I say there was
+many things in her demeanour that pleased me; yet she was a free-handed
+woman to the needful, and when she died she was more missed than it was
+thought she could have been.
+
+Shortly after her funeral, which was managed by a gentleman sent from her
+friends in Edinburgh, that I wrote to about her condition, the Major, her
+son, with his lady, Kate Malcolm, and two pretty bairns, came and stayed
+in her house for a time, and they were a great happiness to us all, both
+in the way of drinking tea, and sometimes taking a bit of dinner, their
+only mother now, the worthy and pious Mrs. Malcolm, being regularly of
+the company.
+
+Before the end of the year, I should mention, that the fortune of Mrs.
+Malcolm’s family got another shove upwards, by the promotion of her
+second son, Robert Malcolm, who, being grown an expert and careful
+mariner, was made captain of a grand ship, whereof Provost Maitland of
+Glasgow, that was kind to his mother in her distresses, was the owner.
+But that douce lad Willie, her youngest son, who was at the university of
+Glasgow under the Lord Eaglesham’s patronage, was like to have suffered a
+blight. However, Major Macadam, when I spoke to him anent the young
+man’s loss of his patron, said, with a pleasant generosity, he should not
+be stickit; and, accordingly, he made up, as far as money could, for the
+loss of his lordship; but there was none that made up for the great power
+and influence, which, I have no doubt, the Earl would have exerted in his
+behalf, when he was ripened for the church. So that, although in time
+William came out a sound and heart-searching preacher, he was long
+obliged, like many another unfriended saint, to cultivate sand, and wash
+Ethiopians in the shape of an east country gentleman’s camstrairy weans;
+than which, as he wrote me himself, there cannot be on earth a greater
+trial of temper. However, in the end he was rewarded, and is not only
+now a placed minister, but a doctor of divinity.
+
+The death of Lady Macadam was followed by another parochial misfortune;
+for, considering the time when it happened, we could count it as nothing
+less. Auld Thomas Howkings, the betheral, fell sick, and died in the
+course of a week’s illness, about the end of November; and the measles
+coming at that time upon the parish, there was such a smashery of the
+poor weans as had not been known for an age; insomuch that James Banes,
+the lad who was Thomas Howkings’ helper, rose in open rebellion against
+the session during his superior’s illness; and we were constrained to
+augment his pay, and to promise him the place if Thomas did not recover,
+which it was then thought he could not do. On the day this happened,
+there were three dead children in the clachan, and a panic and
+consternation spread about the burial of them when James Bane’s
+insurrection was known, which made both me and the session glad to hush
+up the affair, that the heart of the public might have no more than the
+sufferings of individuals to hurt it.—Thus ended a year, on many
+accounts, heavy to be remembered.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIII
+YEAR 1782
+
+
+ALTHOUGH I have not been particular in noticing it, from time to time,
+there had been an occasional going off, at fairs and on market-days, of
+the lads of the parish as soldiers, and when Captain Malcolm got the
+command of his ship, no less than four young men sailed with him from the
+clachan; so that we were deeper and deeper interested in the proceedings
+of the doleful war that was raging in the plantations. By one post we
+heard of no less than three brave fellows belonging to us being slain in
+one battle, for which there was a loud and general lamentation.
+
+Shortly after this, I got a letter from Charles Malcolm, a very pretty
+letter it indeed was: he had heard of my Lord Eaglesham’s murder, and
+grieved for the loss, both because his lordship was a good man, and
+because he had been such a friend to him and his family. “But,” said
+Charles, “the best way I can show my gratitude for his patronage, is to
+prove myself a good officer to my king and country.” Which I thought a
+brave sentiment, and was pleased thereat; for somehow Charles, from the
+time he brought me the limes to make a bowl of punch, in his pocket from
+Jamaica, had built a nest of affection in my heart. But, oh! the wicked
+wastry of life in war. In less than a month after, the news came of a
+victory over the French fleet, and by the same post I got a letter from
+Mr. Howard, that was the midshipman who came to see us with Charles,
+telling me that poor Charles had been mortally wounded in the action, and
+had afterwards died of his wounds. “He was a hero in the engagement,”
+said Mr. Howard, “and he died as a good and a brave man should.”—These
+tidings gave me one of the sorest hearts I ever suffered, and it was long
+before I could gather fortitude to disclose the tidings to poor Charles’s
+mother. But the callants of the school had heard of the victory, and
+were going shouting about, and had set the steeple bell a-ringing, by
+which Mrs. Malcolm heard the news; and knowing that Charles’s ship was
+with the fleet, she came over to the manse in great anxiety to hear the
+particulars, somebody telling her that there had been a foreign letter to
+me by the postman.
+
+When I saw her I could not speak, but looked at her in pity, and, the
+tear fleeing up into my eyes, she guessed what had happened. After
+giving a deep and sore sigh, she enquired, “How did he behave? I hope
+well, for he was aye a gallant laddie!”—and then she wept very bitterly.
+However, growing calmer, I read to her the letter; and, when I had done,
+she begged me to give it to her to keep, saying, “It’s all that I have
+now left of my pretty boy; but it’s mair precious to me than the wealth
+of the Indies;” and she begged me to return thanks to the Lord for all
+the comforts and manifold mercies with which her lot had been blessed,
+since the hour she put her trust in him alone; and that was when she was
+left a penniless widow, with her five fatherless bairns.
+
+It was just an edification of the spirit to see the Christian resignation
+of this worthy woman. Mrs. Balwhidder was confounded, and said, there
+was more sorrow in seeing the deep grief of her fortitude than tongue
+could tell.
+
+ [Picture: The Old Herd]
+
+Having taken a glass of wine with her, I walked out to conduct her to her
+own house; but in the way we met with a severe trial. All the weans were
+out parading with napkins and kail-blades on sticks, rejoicing and
+triumphing in the glad tidings of victory. But when they saw me and Mrs.
+Malcolm coming slowly along, they guessed what had happened, and threw
+away their banners of joy; and standing all up in a row, with silence and
+sadness, along the kirkyard wall as we passed, showed an instinct of
+compassion that penetrated to my very soul. The poor mother burst into
+fresh affliction, and some of the bairns into an audible weeping; and,
+taking one another by the hand, they followed us to her door, like
+mourners at a funeral. Never was such a sight seen in any town before.
+The neighbours came to look at it as we walked along, and the men turned
+aside to hide their faces; while the mothers pressed their babies
+fondlier to their bosoms, and watered their innocent faces with their
+tears.
+
+I prepared a suitable sermon, taking as the words of my text, “Howl, ye
+ships of Tarshish, for your strength is laid waste.” But when I saw
+around me so many of my people clad in complimentary mourning for the
+gallant Charles Malcolm, and that even poor daft Jenny Gaffaw, and her
+daughter, had on an old black riband; and when I thought of him, the
+spirited laddie, coming home from Jamaica with his parrot on his
+shoulder, and his limes for me, my heart filled full, and I was obliged
+to sit down in the pulpit, and drop a tear.
+
+After a pause, and the Lord having vouchsafed to compose me, I rose up,
+and gave out that anthem of triumph, the 124th psalm, the singing of
+which brought the congregation round to themselves; but still I felt that
+I could not preach as I had meant to do; therefore I only said a few
+words of prayer, and singing another psalm, dismissed the congregation.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIV
+YEAR 1783
+
+
+THIS was another Sabbath year of my ministry. It has left me nothing to
+record but a silent increase of prosperity in the parish. I myself had
+now in the bank more than a thousand pounds, and every thing was thriving
+around. My two bairns, Gilbert, that is now the merchant in Glasgow, was
+grown into a sturdy ramplor laddie, and Janet, that is married upon Dr.
+Kittleword, the minister of Swappington, was as fine a lassie for her
+years as the eyes of a parent could desire to see.
+
+Shortly after the news of the peace, an event at which all gave
+themselves up to joy, a thing happened among us that at the time caused
+much talk; but although very dreadful, was yet not so serious, some how
+or other, as such an awsome doing should have been. Poor Jenny Gaffaw
+happened to take a heavy cold, and soon thereafter died. Meg went about
+from house to house, begging dead-clothes, and got the body straighted in
+a wonderful decent manner, with a plate of earth and salt placed upon
+it—an admonitory type of mortality and eternal life that has
+ill-advisedly gone out of fashion. When I heard of this, I could not but
+go to see how a creature that was not thought possessed of a grain of
+understanding, could have done so much herself. On entering the door, I
+beheld Meg sitting with two or three of the neighbouring kimmers, and the
+corpse laid out on a bed. “Come awa’, sir,” said Meg; “this is an
+altered house. They’re gane that keepit it bein; but, sir, we maun a’
+come to this—we maun pay the debt o’ nature—death is a grim creditor, and
+a doctor but brittle bail when the hour of reckoning’s at han’! What a
+pity it is, mother, that you’re now dead, for here’s the minister come to
+see you. Oh, sir! but she would have had a proud heart to see you in her
+dwelling, for she had a genteel turn, and would not let me, her only
+daughter, mess or mell wi’ the lathron lasses of the clachan. Ay, ay,
+she brought me up with care, and edicated me for a lady: nae coarse wark
+darkened my lily-white hands. But I maun work now; I maun dree the
+penalty of man.”
+
+Having stopped some time, listening to the curious maunnering of Meg, I
+rose to come away; but she laid her hand on my arm, saying, “No, sir, ye
+maun taste before ye gang! My mother had aye plenty in her life, nor
+shall her latter day be needy.”
+
+Accordingly, Meg, with all the due formality common on such occasions,
+produced a bottle of water, and a dram-glass, which she filled and
+tasted, then presented to me, at the same time offering me a bit of bread
+on a slate. It was a consternation to everybody how the daft creature
+had learnt all the ceremonies, which she performed in a manner past the
+power of pen to describe, making the solemnity of death, by her strange
+mockery, a kind of merriment, that was more painful than sorrow; but some
+spirits are gifted with a faculty of observation, that, by the strength
+of a little fancy, enables them to make a wonderful and truthlike
+semblance of things and events, which they never saw, and poor Meg seemed
+to have this gift.
+
+The same night, the session having provided a coffin, the body was put
+in, and removed to Mr. Mutchkin’s brewhouse, where the lads and lassies
+kept the late-wake.
+
+Saving this, the year flowed in a calm, and we floated on in the stream
+of time towards the great ocean of eternity, like ducks and geese in the
+river’s tide, that are carried down without being sensible of the speed
+of the current. Alas! we have not wings like them, to fly back to the
+place we set out from.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXV
+YEAR 1784
+
+
+I HAVE ever thought that this was a bright year, truly an Ann. Dom., for
+in it many of the lads came home that had listed to be soldiers; and Mr.
+Howard, that was the midshipman, being now a captain of a man-of-war,
+came down from England and married Effie Malcolm, and took her up with
+him to London, where she wrote to her mother, that she found his family
+people of great note, and more kind to her than she could write. By this
+time, also, Major Macadam was made a colonel, and lived with his lady in
+Edinburgh, where they were much respected by the genteeler classes, Mrs.
+Macadam being considered a great unco among them for all manner of
+ladylike ornaments, she having been taught every sort of perfection in
+that way by the old lady, who was educated at the court of France, and
+was, from her birth, a person of quality. In this year, also, Captain
+Malcolm, her brother, married a daughter of a Glasgow merchant, so that
+Mrs. Malcolm, in her declining years, had the prospect of a bright
+setting; but nothing could change the sober Christianity of her settled
+mind; and although she was strongly invited, both by the Macadams and the
+Howards, to see their felicity, she ever declined the same, saying—“No!
+I have been long out of the world, or rather, I have never been in it; my
+ways are not as theirs; and although I ken their hearts would be glad to
+be kind to me, I might fash their servants, or their friends might think
+me unlike other folk, by which, instead of causing pleasure,
+mortification might ensue; so I will remain in my own house, trusting
+that, when they can spare the time, they will come and see me.”
+
+There was a spirit of true wisdom in this resolution, for it required a
+forbearance that in weaker minds would have relaxed; but though a person
+of a most slender and delicate frame of body, she was a Judith in
+fortitude; and in all the fortune that seemed now smiling upon her, she
+never was lifted up, but bore always that pale and meek look, which gave
+a saintliness to her endeavours in the days of her suffering and poverty.
+
+But when we enjoy most, we have least to tell. I look back on this year
+as on a sunny spot in the valley, amidst the shadows of the clouds of
+time; and I have nothing to record, save the remembrance of welcomings
+and weddings, and a meeting of bairns and parents, that the wars and the
+waters had long raged between. Contentment within the bosom, lent a
+livelier grace to the countenance of Nature; and everybody said, that in
+this year the hedges were greener than common, the gowans brighter on the
+brae, and the heads of the statelier trees adorned with a richer coronal
+of leaves and blossoms. All things were animated with the gladness of
+thankfulness, and testified to the goodness of their Maker.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVI
+YEAR 1785
+
+
+WELL may we say, in the pious words of my old friend and neighbour, the
+Reverend Mr. Keekie of Loupinton, that the world is such a
+wheel-carriage, that it might very properly be called the WHIRL’D. This
+reflection was brought home to me in a very striking manner, while I was
+preparing a discourse for my people, to be preached on the anniversary
+day of my placing, in which I took a view of what had passed in the
+parish during the five-and-twenty years that I had been, by the grace of
+God, the pastor thereof. The bairns, that were bairns when I came among
+my people, were ripened unto parents, and a new generation was swelling
+in the bud around me. But it is what happened that I have to give an
+account of.
+
+This year the Lady Macadam’s jointure-house that was, having been long
+without a tenant, a Mr. Cayenne and his family, American loyalists, came
+and took it, and settled among us for a time. His wife was a clever
+woman, and they had two daughters, Miss Virginia and Miss Carolina; but
+he was himself an ettercap, a perfect spunkie of passion, as ever was
+known in town or country. His wife had a terrible time o’t with him, and
+yet the unhappy man had a great share of common sense, and, saving the
+exploits of his unmanageable temper, was an honest and creditable
+gentleman. Of his humour we soon had a sample, as I shall relate at
+length all about it.
+
+Shortly after he came to the parish, Mrs. Balwhidder and me waited upon
+the family to pay our respects, and Mr. Cayenne, in a free and hearty
+manner, insisted on us staying to dinner. His wife, I could see, was not
+satisfied with this, not being, as I discerned afterwards, prepared to
+give an entertainment to strangers; however, we fell into the misfortune
+of staying, and nothing could exceed the happiness of Mr. Cayenne. I
+thought him one of the blithest bodies I had ever seen, and had no notion
+that he was such a tap of tow as in the sequel he proved himself.
+
+As there was something extra to prepare, the dinner was a little longer
+of being on the table than usual, at which he began to fash, and every
+now and then took a turn up and down the room, with his hands behind his
+back, giving a short melancholious whistle. At length the dinner was
+served, but it was more scanty than he had expected, and this upset his
+good-humour altogether. Scarcely had I asked the blessing when he began
+to storm at his blackamoor servant, who was, however, used to his way,
+and did his work without minding him; but by some neglect there was no
+mustard down, which Mr. Cayenne called for in the voice of a tempest, and
+one of the servant lassies came in with the pot, trembling. It happened
+that, as it had not been used for a day or two before, the lid was
+clagged, and, as it were, glued in, so that Mr. Cayenne could not get it
+out, which put him quite wud, and he attempted to fling it at Sambo, the
+black lad’s head, but it stottit against the wall, and the lid flying
+open, the whole mustard flew in his own face, which made him a sight not
+to be spoken of. However it calmed him; but really, as I had never seen
+such a man before, I could not but consider the accident as a
+providential reproof, and trembled to think what greater evil might fall
+out in the hands of a man so left to himself in the intemperance of
+passion.
+
+But the worst thing about Mr. Cayenne was his meddling with matters in
+which he had no concern; for he had a most irksome nature, and could not
+be at rest, so that he was truly a thorn in our side. Among other of his
+strange doings, was the part he took in the proceedings of the session,
+with which he had as little to do, in a manner, as the man in the moon;
+but having no business on his hands, he attended every sederunt, and from
+less to more, having no self-government, he began to give his opinion in
+our deliberations; and often bred us trouble, by causing strife to arise.
+
+It happened, as the time of the summer occasion was drawing near, that it
+behoved us to make arrangements about the assistance; and upon the
+suggestion of the elders, to which I paid always the greatest deference,
+I invited Mr. Keekie of Loupinton, who was a sound preacher, and a great
+expounder of the kittle parts of the Old Testament, being a man well
+versed in the Hebrew and etymologies, for which he was much reverenced by
+the old people that delighted to search the Scriptures. I had also
+written to Mr. Sprose of Annock, a preacher of another sort, being a
+vehement and powerful thresher of the word, making the chaff and vain
+babbling of corrupt commentators to fly from his hand. He was not,
+however, so well liked, as he wanted that connect method which is needful
+to the enforcing of doctrine. But he had never been among us, and it was
+thought it would be a godly treat to the parish to let the people hear
+him. Besides Mr. Sprose, Mr. Waikle of Gowanry, a quiet hewer out of the
+image of holiness in the heart, was likewise invited, all in addition to
+our old stoops from the adjacent parishes.
+
+None of these three preachers were in any estimation with Mr. Cayenne,
+who had only heard each of them once; and he, happening to be present in
+the session-house at the time, enquired how we had settled. I thought
+this not a very orderly question, but I gave him a civil answer, saying,
+that, Mr. Keekie of Loupinton would preach on the morning of the
+fast-day, Mr. Sprose of Annock in the afternoon, and Mr. Waikle of
+Gowanry on the Saturday. Never shall I or the elders, while the breath
+of life is in our bodies, forget the reply. Mr. Cayenne struck the table
+like a clap of thunder, and cried, “Mr. Keekie of Loupinton, and Mr.
+Sprose of Annock, and Mr. Waikle of Gowanry, and all suck trash, may go
+to — and be —!” and out of the house he bounced, like a hand-ball
+stotting on a stone.
+
+The elders and me were confounded, and for some time we could not speak,
+but looked at each other, doubtful if our ears heard aright. At long and
+length I came to myself; and, in the strength of God, took my place at
+the table, and said, this was an outrageous impiety not to be borne,
+which all the elders agreed to; and we thereupon came to a resolve, which
+I dictated myself, wherein we debarred Mr. Cayenne from ever after
+entering, unless summoned, the session-house, the which resolve we
+directed the session-clerk to send to him direct, and thus we vindicated
+the insulted privileges of the church.
+
+Mr. Cayenne had cooled before he got home, and our paper coming to him in
+his appeased blood, he immediately came to the manse, and made a contrite
+apology for his hasty temper, which I reported in due time and form, to
+the session, and there the matter ended. But here was an example plain
+to be seen of the truth of the old proverb, that as one door shuts
+another opens; for scarcely were we in quietness by the decease of that
+old light-headed woman, the Lady Macadam, till a full equivalent for her
+was given in this hot and fiery Mr. Cayenne.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVII
+YEAR 1786
+
+
+FROM the day of my settlement, I had resolved, in order to win the
+affections of my people, and to promote unison among the heritors, to be
+of as little expense to the parish as possible; but by this time the
+manse had fallen into a sore state of decay—the doors were wormed on the
+hinges—the casements of the windows chattered all the winter, like the
+teeth of a person perishing with cold, so that we had no comfort in the
+house; by which, at the urgent instigations of Mrs. Balwhidder, I was
+obligated to represent our situation to the session. I would rather,
+having so much saved money in the bank, paid the needful repairs myself,
+than have done this, but she said it would be a rank injustice to our own
+family; and her father, Mr. Kibbock, who was very long-headed, with more
+than a common man’s portion of understanding, pointed out to me, that, as
+my life was but in my lip, it would be a wrong thing towards whomsoever
+was ordained to be my successor, to use the heritors to the custom of the
+minister paying for the reparations of the manse, as it might happen he
+might not be so well able to afford it as me. So in a manner, by their
+persuasion, and the constraint of the justice of the case, I made a
+report of the infirmities both of doors and windows, as well as of the
+rotten state of the floors, which were constantly in want of cobbling.
+Over and above all, I told them of the sarking of the roof, which was as
+frush as a puddock-stool; insomuch, that in every blast some of the pins
+lost their grip, and the slates came hurling off.
+
+The heritors were accordingly convened, and, after some deliberation,
+they proposed that the house should be seen to, and whitewashed and
+painted; and I thought this might do, for I saw they were terrified at
+the expense of a thorough repair; but when I went home and repeated to
+Mrs. Balwhidder what had been said at the meeting, and my thankfulness at
+getting the heritors’ consent to do so much, she was excessively angry,
+and told me, that all the painting and whitewashing in the world would
+avail nothing, for that the house was as a sepulchre full of rottenness;
+and she sent for Mr. Kibbock, her father, to confer with him on the way
+of getting the matter put to rights.
+
+Mr. Kibbock came, and hearing of what had passed, pondered for some time,
+and then said, “All was very right! the minister (meaning me) has just to
+get tradesmen to look at the house, and write out their opinion of what
+it needs. There will be plaster to mend; so, before painting, he will
+get a plasterer. There will be a slater wanted; he has just to get a
+slater’s estimate, and a wright’s, and so forth, and when all is done, he
+will lay them before the session and the heritors, who, no doubt, will
+direct the reparations to go forward.”
+
+ [Picture: The Roadman]
+
+This was very pawkie, counselling, of Mr. Kibbock, and I did not see
+through it at the time, but did as he recommended, and took all the
+different estimates, when they came in, to the session. The elders
+commended my prudence exceedingly for so doing, before going to work; and
+one of them asked me what the amount of the whole would be, but I had not
+cast it up. Some of the heritors thought that a hundred pounds would be
+sufficient for the outlay; but judge of our consternation, when, in
+counting up all the sums of the different estimates together, we found
+them well on towards a thousand pounds. “Better big a new house at once,
+than do this!” cried all the elders, by which I then perceived the
+draughtiness of Mr. Kibbock’s advice. Accordingly, another meeting of
+the heritors was summoned, and after a great deal of controversy, it was
+agreed that a new manse should be erected; and, shortly after, we
+contracted with Thomas Trowel, the mason to build one for six hundred
+pounds, with all the requisite appurtenances, by which a clear gain was
+saved to the parish, by the foresight of Mr. Kibbock, to the amount of
+nearly four hundred pounds. But the heritors did not mean to have
+allowed the sort of repair that his plan comprehended. He was, however,
+a far forecasting man; the like of him for natural parts not being in our
+country side; and nobody could get the whip-hand of him, either in a
+bargain or an improvement, when he once was sensible of the advantage.
+He was, indeed, a blessing to the shire, both by his example as a farmer,
+and by his sound and discreet advice in the contentions of his
+neighbours, being a man, as was a saying among the commonality, “wiser
+than the law and the fifteen Lords of Edinburgh.”
+
+The building of the new manse occasioned a heavy cess on the heritors,
+which made them overly ready to pick holes in the coats of me and the
+elders; so that, out of my forbearance and delicacy in time past, grew a
+lordliness on their part, that was an ill return for the years that I had
+endured no little inconveniency for their sake. It was not in my heart
+or principles to harm the hair of a dog; but when I discerned the
+austerity with which they were disposed to treat their minister, I
+bethought me that, for the preservation of what was due to the
+establishment and the upholding of the decent administration of religion,
+I ought to set my face against the sordid intolerance by which they were
+actuated. This notion I weighed well before divulging it to any person;
+but when I had assured myself as to the rectitude thereof, I rode over
+one day to Mr. Kibbock’s, and broke my mind to him about claiming out of
+the teinds an augmentation of my stipend, not because I needed it, but in
+case, after me, some bare and hungry gorbie of the Lord should be sent
+upon the parish, in no such condition to plea with the heritors as I was.
+Mr. Kibbock highly approved of my intent; and by his help, after much
+tribulation, I got an augmentation both in glebe and income; and to mark
+my reason for what I did, I took upon me to keep and clothe the wives and
+orphans of the parish, who lost their breadwinners in the American war.
+But for all that, the heritors spoke of me as an avaricious Jew, and made
+the hard-won fruits of Mrs. Balwhidder’s great thrift and good management
+a matter of reproach against me. Few of them would come to the church,
+but stayed away, to the detriment of their own souls hereafter, in order,
+as they thought, to punish me; so that, in the course of this year, there
+was a visible decay of the sense of religion among the better orders of
+the parish, and, as will be seen in the sequel, their evil example
+infected the minds of many of the rising generation.
+
+It was in this year that Mr. Cayenne bought the mailing of the Wheatrigs,
+but did not begin to build his house till the following spring; for being
+ill to please with a plan, he fell out with the builders, and on one
+occasion got into such a passion with Mr. Trowel, the mason, that he
+struck him a blow on the face, for which he was obligated to make
+atonement. It was thought the matter would have been carried before the
+Lords; but, by the mediation of Mr. Kibbock, with my helping hand, a
+reconciliation was brought about, Mr. Cayenne indemnifying the mason with
+a sum of money to say no more anent it; after which, he employed him to
+build his house, a thing that no man could have thought possible, who
+reflected on the enmity between them.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVIII
+YEAR 1787
+
+
+THERE had been, as I have frequently observed, a visible improvement
+going on in the parish. From the time of the making of the toll-road,
+every new house that was built in the clachan was built along that road.
+Among other changes hereby caused, the Lady Macadam’s jointure-house that
+was, which stood in a pleasant parterre, inclosed within a stone wall and
+an iron gate, having a pillar with a pineapple head on each side, came to
+be in the middle of the town. While Mr. Cayenne inhabited the same, it
+was maintained in good order; but on his flitting to his own new house on
+the Wheatrigs, the parterre was soon overrun with weeds, and it began to
+wear the look of a waste place. Robert Toddy, who then kept the
+change-house, and who had, from the lady’s death, rented the coach-house
+for stabling, in this juncture thought of it for an inn; so he set his
+own house to Thomas Treddles the weaver, whose son, William, is now the
+great Glasgow manufacturer, that has cotton-mills and steam-engines, and
+took, “the Place,” as it was called, and had a fine sign, THE CROSS-KEYS,
+painted and put up in golden characters, by which it became one of the
+most noted inns anywhere to be seen; and the civility of Mrs. Toddy was
+commended by all strangers. But although this transmutation from a
+change-house to an inn was a vast amendment, in a manner, to the parish,
+there was little amendment of manners thereby; for the farmer lads began
+to hold dancings and other riotous proceedings there, and to bring, as it
+were, the evil practices of towns into the heart of the country. All
+sort of licence was allowed as to drink and hours; and the edifying
+example of Mr. Mutchkins and his pious family, was no longer held up to
+the imitation of the wayfaring man.
+
+Saving the mutation of “the Place” into an inn, nothing very remarkable
+happened in this year. We got into our new manse about the middle of
+March; but it was rather damp, being new plastered, and it caused me to
+have a severe attack of the rheumatics in the fall of the year.
+
+I should not, in my notations, forget to mark a new luxury that got in
+among the commonality at this time. By the opening of new roads, and the
+traffic thereon with carts and carriers, and by our young men that were
+sailors going to the Clyde, and sailing to Jamaica and the West Indies,
+heaps of sugar and coffee-beans were brought home, while many, among the
+kail-stocks and cabbages in their yards, had planted groset and berry
+bushes; which two things happening together, the fashion to make jam and
+jelly, which hitherto had been only known in the kitchens and
+confectionaries of the gentry, came to be introduced into the clachan.
+All this, however, was not without a plausible pretext; for it was found
+that jelly was an excellent medicine for a sore throat, and jam a remedy
+as good as London candy for a cough, or a cold, or a shortness of breath.
+I could not, however, say that this gave me so much concern as the
+smuggling trade, only it occasioned a great fasherie to Mrs. Balwhidder;
+for, in the berry time, there was no end to the borrowing of her
+brass-pan to make jelly and jam, till Mrs. Toddy of the Cross-Keys bought
+one, which, in its turn, came into request, and saved ours.
+
+It was in the Martinmas quarter of this year that I got the first payment
+of my augmentation. Having no desire to rip up old sores, I shall say no
+more anent it, the worst being anticipated in my chronicle of the last
+year; but there was a thing happened in the payment that occasioned a
+vexation at the time, of a very disagreeable nature. Daft Meg Gaffaw,
+who, from the tragical death of her mother, was a privileged subject,
+used to come to the manse on the Saturdays for a meal of meat; and so it
+fell out that as, by some neglect of mine, no steps had been taken to
+regulate the disposal of the victual that constituted the means of the
+augmentation, some of the heritors, in an ungracious temper, sent what
+they called the tithe-ball (the Lord knows it was not the fiftieth!) to
+the manse, where I had no place to put it. This fell out on a Saturday
+night, when I was busy with my sermon, thinking not of silver or gold,
+but of much better; so that I was greatly molested and disturbed thereby.
+Daft Meg, who sat by the kitchen chimley-lug, hearing a’, said nothing
+for a time; but when she saw how Mrs. Balwhidder and me were put to, she
+cried out with a loud voice, like a soul under the inspiration of
+prophecy—“When the widow’s cruse had filled all the vessels in the house,
+the Lord stopped the increase. Verily, verily, I say unto you, if your
+barns be filled, and your girnell-kists can hold no more, seek till ye
+shall find the tume basins of the poor, and therein pour the corn, and
+the oil, and the wine of your abundance; so shall ye be blessed of the
+Lord.” The which words I took for an admonition, and directing the sacks
+to be brought into the dining-room and other chambers of the manse, I
+sent off the heritors’ servants, that had done me this prejudice, with an
+unexpected thankfulness. But this, as I afterwards was informed, both
+them and their masters attributed to the greedy grasp of avarice, with
+which they considered me as misled; and having said so, nothing could
+exceed their mortification on Monday, when they heard (for they were of
+those who had deserted the kirk) that I had given by the precentor notice
+to every widow in the parish that was in need, to come to the manse and
+she would receive her portion of the partitioning of the augmentation.
+Thus, without any offence on my part, saving the strictness of justice,
+was a division made between me and the heritors; but the people were with
+me; and my own conscience was with me; and though the fronts of the lofts
+and the pews of the heritors were but thinly filled, I trusted that a
+good time was coming, when the gentry would see the error of their way.
+So I bent the head of resignation to the Lord, and, assisted by the
+wisdom of Mr. Kibbock, adhered to the course I had adopted; but at the
+close of the year my heart was sorrowful for the schism; and my prayer on
+Hogmanay was one of great bitterness of soul, that such an evil had come
+to pass.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIX
+YEAR 1788
+
+
+IT had been often remarked by ingenious men, that the Brawl burn, which
+ran through the parish, though a small, was yet a rapid stream, and had a
+wonderful capability for damming, and to turn mills. From the time that
+the Irville water deserted its channel this brook grew into repute, and
+several mills and dams had been erected on its course. In this year a
+proposal came from Glasgow to build a cotton-mill on its banks, beneath
+the Witch-linn, which being on a corner of the Wheatrig, the property of
+Mr. Cayenne, he not only consented thereto, but took a part in the profit
+or loss therein; and, being a man of great activity, though we thought
+him, for many a day, a serpent-plague sent upon the parish, he proved
+thereby one of our greatest benefactors. The cotton-mill was built, and
+a spacious fabric it was—nothing like it had been seen before in our day
+and generation—and, for the people that were brought to work in it, a new
+town was built in the vicinity, which Mr. Cayenne, the same being founded
+on his land, called Cayenneville, the name of the plantation in Virginia
+that had been taken from him by the rebellious Americans. From that day
+Fortune was lavish of her favours upon him; his property swelled, and
+grew in the most extraordinary manner, and the whole country side was
+stirring with a new life. For, when the mill was set a-going, he got
+weavers of muslin established in Cayenneville; and shortly after, but
+that did not take place till the year following, he brought women all the
+way from the neighbourhood of Manchester, in England, to teach the lassie
+bairns in our old clachan tambouring.
+
+Some of the ancient families, in their turreted houses, were not pleased
+with this innovation, especially when they saw the handsome dwellings
+that were built for the weavers of the mills, and the unstinted hand that
+supplied the wealth required for the carrying on of the business. It
+sank their pride into insignificance, and many of them would almost
+rather have wanted the rise that took place in the value of their lands,
+than have seen this incoming of what they called o’er-sea speculation.
+But, saving the building of the cotton-mill, and the beginning of
+Cayenneville, nothing more memorable happened in this year, still it was
+nevertheless a year of a great activity. The minds of men were excited
+to new enterprises; a new genius, as it were, had descended upon the
+earth, and there was an erect and outlooking spirit abroad that was not
+to be satisfied with the taciturn regularity of ancient affairs. Even
+Miss Sabrina Hooky, the schoolmistress, though now waned from her
+meridian, was touched with the enlivening rod, and set herself to learn
+and to teach tambouring, in such a manner as to supersede by precept and
+example that old time-honoured functionary, as she herself called it, the
+spinning-wheel, proving, as she did one night to Mr. Kibbock and me,
+that, if more money could be made by a woman tambouring than by spinning,
+it was better for her to tambour than to spin.
+
+But, in the midst of all this commercing and manufacturing, I began to
+discover signs of decay in the wonted simplicity of our country ways.
+Among the cotton-spinners and muslin weavers of Cayenneville were several
+unsatisfied and ambitious spirits, who clubbed together, and got a London
+newspaper to the Cross-Keys, where they were nightly in the habit of
+meeting and debating about the affairs of the French, which were then
+gathering towards a head. They were represented to me as lads by common
+in capacity, but with unsettled notions of religion. They were, however,
+quiet and orderly; and some of them since, at Glasgow, Paisley, and
+Manchester, even, I am told, in London, have grown into a topping way.
+
+It seems they did not like my manner of preaching, and on that account
+absented themselves from public worship; which, when I heard, I sent for
+some of them, to convince them of their error with regard to the truth of
+divers points of doctrine; but they confounded me with their objections,
+and used my arguments, which were the old and orthodox proven opinions of
+the Divinity Hall, as if they had been the light sayings of a vain man.
+So that I was troubled, fearing that some change would ensue to my
+people, who had hitherto lived amidst the boughs and branches of the
+gospel unmolested by the fowler’s snare, and I set myself to watch
+narrowly, and with a vigilant eye, what would come to pass.
+
+There was a visible increase among us of worldly prosperity in the course
+of this year; insomuch that some of the farmers, who were in the custom
+of taking their vendibles to the neighbouring towns on the Tuesdays, the
+Wednesdays, and Fridays, were led to open a market on the Saturdays in
+our own clachan, the which proved a great convenience. But I cannot take
+it upon me to say, whether this can be said to have well begun in the
+present Ann. Dom., although I know that in the summer of the ensuing year
+it was grown into a settled custom; which I well recollect by the
+Macadams coming with their bairns to see Mrs. Malcolm, their mother,
+suddenly on a Saturday afternoon; on which occasion me and Mrs.
+Balwhidder were invited to dine with them, and Mrs. Malcolm bought in the
+market for the dinner that day, both mutton and fowls, such as twenty
+years before could not have been got for love or money on such a pinch.
+Besides, she had two bottles of red and white wine from the Cross-Keys,
+luxuries which, saving in the Breadland House in its best days, could not
+have been had in the whole parish, but must have been brought from a
+borough town; for Eaglesham Castle is not within the bounds of
+Dalmailing, and my observe does not apply to the stock and stores of that
+honourable mansion, but only to the dwellings of our own heritors, who
+were in general straitened in their circumstances, partly with upsetting,
+and partly by the eating rust of family pride, which hurt the edge of
+many a clever fellow among them, that would have done well in the way of
+trade, but sunk into divors for the sake of their genteelity.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXX
+YEAR 1789
+
+
+THIS I have always reflected upon as one of our blessed years. It was
+not remarkable for any extraordinary occurrence; but there was a
+hopefulness in the minds of men, and a planning of new undertakings, of
+which, whatever may be the upshot, the devising is ever rich in the
+cheerful anticipations of good.
+
+Another new line of road was planned, for a shorter cut to the
+cotton-mill, from the main road to Glasgow, and a public-house was opened
+in Cayenneville: the latter, however, was not an event that gave me much
+satisfaction; but it was a convenience to the inhabitants, and the
+carriers that brought the cotton-bags and took away the yarn twice
+a-week, needed a place of refreshment. And there was a stage-coach set
+up thrice every week from Ayr, that passed through the town, by which it
+was possible to travel to Glasgow between breakfast and dinner time, a
+thing that could not, when I came to the parish, have been thought within
+the compass of man.
+
+This stage-coach I thought one of the greatest conveniences that had been
+established among us; and it enabled Mrs. Balwhidder to send a basket of
+her fresh butter into the Glasgow market, by which, in the spring and the
+fall of the year, she got a great price; for the Glasgow merchants are
+fond of excellent eatables, and the payment was aye ready money—Tam
+Whirlit the driver paying for the one basket when he took up the other.
+
+In this year William Malcolm, the youngest son of the widow, having been
+some time a tutor in a family in the east country, came to see his
+mother, as indeed he had done every year from the time he went to the
+college; but this occasion was made remarkable by his preaching in my
+pulpit. His old acquaintance were curious to hear him; and I myself had
+a sort of a wish likewise, being desirous to know how far he was
+orthodox; so I thought fit, on the suggestion of one of the elders, to
+ask him to preach one day for me, which, after some fleeching, he
+consented to do. I think, however, there was a true modesty in his
+diffidence, although his reason was a weak one, being lest he might not
+satisfy his mother, who had as yet never heard him. Accordingly, on the
+Sabbath after, he did preach, and the kirk was well packed, and I was not
+one of the least attentive of the congregation. His sermon assuredly was
+well put together and there was nothing to object to in his doctrine; but
+the elderly people thought his language rather too Englified, which I
+thought likewise; for I never could abide that the plain auld Kirk of
+Scotland, with her sober presbyterian simplicity, should borrow, either
+in word or in deed, from the language of the prelatic hierarchy of
+England. Nevertheless, the younger part of the congregation were loud in
+his praise, saying, there had not been heard before such a style of
+language in our side of the country. As for Mrs. Malcolm, his mother,
+when I spoke to her anent the same, she said but little, expressing only
+her hope that his example would be worthy of his precepts; so that, upon
+the whole, it was a satisfaction to us all, that he was likely to prove a
+stoop and upholding pillar to the Kirk of Scotland. And his mother had
+the satisfaction, before she died, to see him a placed minister, and his
+name among the authors of his country; for he published at Edinburgh a
+volume of Moral Essays, of which he sent me a pretty bound copy, and they
+were greatly creditable to his pen, though lacking somewhat of that birr
+and smeddum that is the juice and flavour of books of that sort.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXI
+YEAR 1790
+
+
+THE features of this Ann. Dom. partook of the character of its
+predecessor. Several new houses were added to the clachan; Cayenneville
+was spreading out with weavers’ shops, and growing up fast into a town.
+In some respects it got the start of ours; for one day, when I was going
+to dine with Mr. Cayenne at Wheatrig House, not a little to my amazement,
+did I behold a bookseller’s shop opened there, with sticks of red and
+black wax, pouncet-boxes, pens, pocket-books, and new publications, in
+the window, such as the like of was only to be seen in cities and borough
+towns. And it was lighted at night by a patent lamp, which shed a
+wonderful beam, burning oil, and having no smoke. The man sold likewise
+perfumery, powder-puffs, trinkets, and Dublin dolls, besides penknives,
+Castile soap, and walking-sticks, together with a prodigy of other
+luxuries too tedious to mention.
+
+Upon conversing with the man, for I was enchanted to go into this
+phenomenon, for as no less could I regard it, he told me that he had a
+correspondence with London, and could get me down any book published
+there within the same month in which it came out; and he showed me divers
+of the newest come out, of which I did not read even in the _Scots
+Magazine_ till more than three months after, although I had till then
+always considered that work as most interesting for its early
+intelligence. But what I was most surprised to hear, was, that he took
+in a daily London newspaper for the spinners and weavers, who paid him a
+penny a-week a-piece for the same; they being all greatly taken up with
+what, at the time, was going on in France.
+
+This bookseller in the end, however, proved a whawp in our nest, for he
+was in league with some of the English reformers; and when the story took
+wind three years after, concerning the plots and treasons of the
+corresponding societies and democrats, he was fain to make a moonlight
+flitting, leaving his wife for a time to manage his affairs. I could
+not, however, think any ill of the man notwithstanding; for he had very
+correct notions of right and justice, in a political sense, and when he
+came into the parish he was as orderly and well-behaved as any other
+body; and conduct is a test that I have always found as good for a man’s
+principles as professions. Nor, at the time of which I am speaking, was
+there any of that dread or fear of reforming the government that has
+since been occasioned by the wild and wasteful hand which the French
+employed in their revolution.
+
+But, among other improvements, I should mention that a Doctor Marigold
+came and settled in Cayenneville, a small, round, happy-tempered man,
+whose funny stories were far better liked than his drugs. There was a
+doubt among some of the weavers if he was a skilful Esculapian; and this
+doubt led to their holding out an inducement to another medical man, Dr.
+Tanzey, to settle there likewise, by which it grew into a saying, that at
+Cayenneville there was a doctor for health as well as sickness; for Dr.
+Marigold was one of the best hands in the country at a pleasant
+punch-bowl, while Dr. Tanzey had all the requisite knowledge for the
+faculty for the bedside.
+
+It was in this year that the hour-plate and hand on the kirk steeple were
+renewed, as indeed, may yet be seen by the date, though it be again
+greatly in want of fresh gilding; for it was by my advice that the
+figures of the Ann. Dom. were placed one in each corner. In this year,
+likewise, the bridge over the Brawl burn was built—a great convenience,
+in the winter time, to the parishioners that lived on the north side; for
+when there happened to be a spait on the Sunday, it kept them from the
+kirk; but I did not find that the bridge mended the matter, till after
+the conclusion of the war against the democrats, and the beginning of
+that which we are now waging with Boney, their child and champion. It
+is, indeed, wonderful to think of the occultation of grace that was
+taking place about this time, throughout the whole bound of Christendom;
+for I could mark a visible darkness of infidelity spreading in the corner
+of the vineyard committed to my keeping, and a falling away of the vines
+from their wonted props and confidence in the truths of Revelation. But
+I said nothing. I knew that the faith could not be lost, and that it
+would be found purer and purer the more it was tried; and this I have
+lived to see, many now being zealous members of the church, that were
+abundantly lukewarm at the period of which I am now speaking.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXII
+YEAR 1791
+
+
+IN the spring of this year, I took my son Gilbert into Glasgow, to place
+him in a counting-house. As he had no inclination for any of the learned
+professions, and not having been there from the time when I was sent to
+the General Assembly, I cannot express my astonishment at the great
+improvements, surpassing far all that was done in our part of the
+country, which I thought was not to be paralleled. When I came
+afterwards to reflect on my simplicity in this, it was clear to me that
+we should not judge of the rest of the world by what we see going on
+around ourselves, but walk abroad into other parts, and thereby enlarge
+our sphere of observation, as well as ripen our judgment of things.
+
+But although there was no doubt a great and visible increase of the city,
+loftier buildings on all sides, and streets that spread their arms far
+into the embraces of the country, I thought the looks of the population
+were impaired, and that there was a greater proportion of long white
+faces in the Trongate, than when I attended the Divinity class. These, I
+was told, were the weavers and others concerned in the cotton trade,
+which I could well believe, for they were very like in their looks to the
+men of Cayenneville; but from living in a crowded town, and not breathing
+a wholesome country air between their tasks, they had a stronger cast of
+unhealthy melancholy. I was therefore very glad that Providence had
+placed in my hand the pastoral staff of a country parish; for it cut me
+to the heart to see so many young men, in the rising prime of life,
+already in the arms of a pale consumption. “If, therefore,” said I to
+Mrs. Balwhidder, when I returned home to the manse, “we live, as it were,
+within the narrow circle of ignorance, we are spared from the pain of
+knowing many an evil; and, surely, in much knowledge there is sadness of
+heart.”
+
+But the main effect of this was to make me do all in my power to keep my
+people contented with their lowly estate; for in that same spirit of
+improvement, which was so busy every where, I could discern something
+like a shadow, that showed it was not altogether of that pure advantage
+which avarice led all so eagerly to believe. Accordingly, I began a
+series of sermons on the evil and vanity of riches, and, for the most
+part of the year, pointed out in what manner they led the possessor to
+indulge in sinful luxuries, and how indulgence begat desire, and desire
+betrayed integrity and corrupted the heart; making it evident that the
+rich man was liable to forget his unmerited obligations to God, and to
+oppress the laborious and the needful when he required their services.
+
+Little did I imagine, in thus striving to keep aloof the ravenous wolf
+Ambition from my guileless flock, that I was giving cause for many to
+think me an enemy to the king and government, and a perverter of
+Christianity, to suit levelling doctrines. But so it was. Many of the
+heritors considered me a blackneb, though I knew it not, but went on in
+the course of my duty, thinking only how best to preserve peace on earth
+and goodwill towards men. I saw, however, an altered manner in the
+deportment of several, with whom I had long lived in friendly terms. It
+was not marked enough to make me inquire the cause, but sufficiently
+plain to affect my ease of mind. Accordingly, about the end of this
+year, I fell into a dull way: my spirit was subdued, and at times I was
+aweary of the day, and longed for the night, when I might close my eyes
+in peaceful slumbers. I missed my son Gilbert, who had been a companion
+to me in the long nights, while his mother was busy with the lasses, and
+their ceaseless wheels and cardings, in the kitchen. Often could I have
+found it in my heart to have banned that never-ceasing industry, and to
+tell Mrs. Balwhidder, that the married state was made for something else
+than to make napery and beetle blankets; but it was her happiness to keep
+all at work, and she had no pleasure in any other way of life, so I sat
+many a night by the fireside with resignation; sometimes in the study,
+and sometimes in the parlour, and, as I was doing nothing, Mrs.
+Balwhidder said it was needless to light the candle. Our daughter Janet
+was in this time at a boarding-school in Ayr, so that I was really a most
+solitary married man.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIII
+YEAR 1792
+
+
+WHEN the spring in this year began to brighten on the brae, the cloud of
+dulness that had darkened and oppressed me all the winter somewhat melted
+away, and I could now and then joke again at the never-ending toil and
+trouble of that busiest of all bees, the second Mrs. Balwhidder. But
+still I was far from being right: a small matter affected me, and I was
+overly given to walking by myself, and musing on things that I could tell
+nothing about—my thoughts were just the rack of a dream without form, and
+driving witlessly as the smoke that mounteth up, and is lost in the airy
+heights of the sky.
+
+Heeding little of what was going on in the clachan, and taking no
+interest in the concerns of any body, I would have been contented to die,
+but I had no ail about me. An accident, however, fell out, that, by
+calling on me for an effort, had the blessed influence of clearing my
+vapours almost entirely away.
+
+One morning as I was walking on the sunny side of the road, where the
+footpath was in the next year made to the cotton-mill, I fell in with Mr.
+Cayenne, who was seemingly much fashed—a small matter could do that at
+any time; and he came up to me with a red face and an angry eye. It was
+not my intent to speak to him; for I was grown loth to enter into
+conversation with any body, so I bowed and passed on. “What,” cried Mr.
+Cayenne, “and will you not speak to me?” I turned round, and said
+meekly, “Mr. Cayenne, I have no objections to speak to you; but having
+nothing particular to say, it did not seem necessary just now.”
+
+He looked at me like a gled, and in a minute exclaimed, “Mad, by Jupiter!
+as mad as a March hare!” He then entered into conversation with me, and
+said, that he had noticed me an altered man, and was just so far on his
+way to the manse, to enquire what had befallen me. So, from less to
+more, we entered into the marrow of my case; and I told him how I had
+observed the estranged countenances of some of the heritors; at which he
+swore an oath, that they were a parcel of the damn’dest boobies in the
+country, and told me how they had taken it into their heads that I was a
+leveller. “But I know you better,” said Mr. Cayenne, “and have stood up
+for you as an honest conscientious man, though I don’t much like your
+humdrum preaching. However, let that pass; I insist upon your dining
+with me to-day, when some of these arrant fools are to be with us, and
+the devil’s in’t if I don’t make you friends with them.” I did not think
+Mr. Cayenne, however, very well qualified for peacemaker, but,
+nevertheless, I consented to go; and having thus got an inkling of the
+cause of that cold back-turning which had distressed me so much, I made
+such an effort to remove the error that was entertained against me, that
+some of the heritors, before we separated, shook me by the hands with the
+cordiality of renewed friendship; and, as if to make amends for past
+neglect, there was no end to their invitations to dinner which had the
+effect of putting me again on my mettle, and removing the thick and muddy
+melancholious humour out of my blood.
+
+But what confirmed my cure was the coming home of my daughter Janet from
+the Ayr boarding-school, where she had learnt to play on the spinnet, and
+was become a conversible lassie, with a competent knowledge, for a woman
+of geography and history; so that when her mother was busy with the
+weariful booming wheel, she entertained me sometimes with a tune, and
+sometimes with her tongue, which made the winter nights fly cantily by.
+
+Whether it was owing to the malady of my imagination throughout the
+greatest part of this year, or that really nothing particular did happen
+to interest me, I cannot say; but it is very remarkable that I have
+nothing remarkable to record—further, than I was at the expense myself of
+getting the manse rough-case, and the window cheeks painted, with roans
+put up, rather than apply to the heritors; for they were always sorely
+fashed when called upon for outlay.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIV
+YEAR 1793
+
+
+ON the first night of this year I dreamt a very remarkable dream, which,
+when I now recall to mind at this distance of time, I cannot but think
+that there was a case of prophecy in it. I thought that I stood on the
+tower of an old popish kirk, looking out at the window upon the kirkyard,
+where I beheld ancient tombs, with effigies and coats-of-arms on the wall
+thereof, and a great gate at the one side, and a door that led into a
+dark and dismal vault at the other. I thought all the dead that were
+lying in the common graves, rose out of their coffins; at the same time,
+from the old and grand monuments, with the effigies and coats-of-arms,
+came the great men, and the kings of the earth with crowns on their
+heads, and globes and sceptres in their hands.
+
+I stood wondering what was to ensue, when presently I heard the noise of
+drums and trumpets, and anon I beheld an army with banners entering in at
+the gate; upon which the kings and the great men came also forth in their
+power and array, and a dreadful battle was foughten; but the multitude
+that had risen from the common graves, stood afar off, and were but
+lookers-on.
+
+The kings and their host were utterly discomfited. They were driven
+within the doors of their monuments, their coats-of-arms were broken off,
+and their effigies cast down, and the victors triumphed over them with
+the flourishes of trumpets and the waving of banners. But while I
+looked, the vision was changed, and I then beheld a wide and a dreary
+waste, and afar off the steeples of a great city, and a tower in the
+midst, like the tower of Babel, and on it I could discern, written in
+characters of fire, “Public Opinion.” While I was pondering at the same,
+I heard a great shout, and presently the conquerors made their
+appearance, coming over the desolate moor. They were going in great
+pride and might towards the city; but an awful burning rose, afar as it
+were in the darkness, and the flames stood like a tower of fire that
+reached unto the heavens. And I saw a dreadful hand and an arm stretched
+from out of the cloud, and in its hold was a besom made of the hail and
+the storm, and it swept the fugitives like dust; and in their place I saw
+the churchyard, as it were, cleared and spread around, the graves closed,
+and the ancient tombs, with their coats-of-arms and their effigies of
+stone, all as they were in the beginning. I then awoke, and behold it
+was a dream.
+
+This vision perplexed me for many days, and when the news came that the
+King of France was beheaded by the hands of his people, I received, as it
+were, a token in confirmation of the vision that had been disclosed to me
+in my sleep, and I preached a discourse on the same, and against the
+French Revolution, that was thought one of the greatest and soundest
+sermons that I had ever delivered in my pulpit.
+
+On the Monday following, Mr. Cayenne, who had been some time before
+appointed a justice of the peace, came over from Wheatrig House to the
+Cross-Keys, where he sent for me and divers other respectable inhabitants
+of the clachan, and told us that he was to have a sad business, for a
+warrant was out to bring before him two democratical weaver lads, on a
+suspicion of high treason. Scarcely were the words uttered when they
+were brought in, and he began to ask them how they dared to think of
+dividing, with their liberty and equality of principles, his and every
+other man’s property in the country. The men answered him in a calm
+manner, and told him they sought no man’s property, but only their own
+natural rights; upon which he called them traitors and reformers. They
+denied they were traitors, but confessed they were reformers, and said
+they knew not how that should be imputed to them as a fault, for that the
+greatest men of all times had been reformers,—“Was not,” they said, “our
+Lord Jesus Christ a reformer?”—“And what the devil did he make of it?”
+cried Mr. Cayenne, bursting with passion; “Was he not crucified?”
+
+I thought, when I heard these words, that the pillars of the earth sank
+beneath me, and that the roof of the house was carried away in a
+whirlwind. The drums of my ears crackit, blue starns danced before my
+sight, and I was fain to leave the house and hie me home to the manse,
+where I sat down in my study, like a stupified creature, awaiting what
+would betide. Nothing, however, was found against the weaver lads; but I
+never from that day could look on Mr. Cayenne as a Christian, though
+surely he was a true government-man.
+
+Soon after this affair, there was a pleasant re-edification of a
+gospel-spirit among the heritors, especially when they heard how I had
+handled the regicides in France; and on the following Sunday, I had the
+comfortable satisfaction to see many a gentleman in their pews, that had
+not been for years within a kirk-door. The democrats, who took a world
+of trouble to misrepresent the actions of the gentry, insinuated that all
+this was not from any new sense of grace, but in fear of their being
+reported as suspected persons to the king’s government. But I could not
+think so, and considered their renewal of communion with the church as a
+swearing of allegiance to the King of kings, against that host of French
+atheists, who had torn the mortcloth from the coffin, and made it a
+banner, with which they were gone forth to war against the Lamb. The
+whole year was, however, spent in great uneasiness, and the proclamation
+of the war was followed by an appalling stop in trade. We heard of
+nothing but failures on all hands; and among others that grieved me, was
+that of Mr. Maitland of Glasgow, who had befriended Mrs. Malcolm in the
+days of her affliction, and gave her son Robert his fine ship. It was a
+sore thing to hear of so many breakings, especially of old respected
+merchants like him, who had been a Lord Provost, and was far declined
+into the afternoon of life. He did not, however, long survive the
+mutation of his fortune; but bending his aged head in sorrow, sank down
+beneath the stroke, to rise no more.
+
+ [Picture: The Minister’s Daughter]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXV
+YEAR 1794
+
+
+THIS year had opened into all the leafiness of midsummer before anything
+memorable happened in the parish, further than that the sad division of
+my people into government-men and jacobins was perfected. This calamity,
+for I never could consider such heartburning among neighbours as any
+thing less than a very heavy calamity, was assuredly occasioned by faults
+on both sides; but it must be confessed that the gentry did nothing to
+win the commonality from the errors of their way. A little more
+condescension on their part would not have made things worse, and might
+have made them better; but pride interposed, and caused them to think
+that any show of affability from them would be construed by the democrats
+into a terror of their power; while the democrats were no less to blame;
+for hearing how their compeers were thriving in France, and demolishing
+every obstacle to their ascendency, they were crouse and really insolent,
+evidencing none of that temperance in prosperity that proves the
+possessors worthy of their good fortune.
+
+As for me, my duty in these circumstances was plain and simple. The
+Christian religion was attempted to be brought into disrepute; the rising
+generation were taught to gibe at its holiest ordinances; and the kirk
+was more frequented as a place to while away the time on a rainy Sunday,
+than for any insight of the admonitions and revelations in the sacred
+book. Knowing this, I perceived that it would be of no effect to handle
+much the mysteries of the faith; but as there was at the time a bruit and
+a sound about universal benevolence, philanthropy, utility, and all the
+other disguises with which an infidel philosophy appropriated to itself
+the charity, brotherly love, and welldoing inculcated by our holy
+religion, I set myself to task upon these heads, and thought it no
+robbery to use a little of the stratagem employed against Christ’s
+kingdom, to promote the interests thereof in the hearts and
+understandings of those whose ears would have been sealed against me, had
+I attempted to expound higher things. Accordingly, on one day it was my
+practice to show what the nature of Christian charity was, comparing it
+to the light and warmth of the sun, that shines impartially on the just
+and the unjust—showing that man, without the sense of it as a duty, was
+as the beasts that perish, and that every feeling of his nature was
+intimately selfish, but then when actuated by this divine impulse, he
+rose out of himself, and became as a god, zealous to abate the sufferings
+of all things that live; and, on the next day, I demonstrated that the
+new benevolence which had come so much into vogue, was but another
+version of this Christian virtue. In like manner, I dealt with brotherly
+love, bringing it home to the business and bosoms of my hearers, that the
+Christianity of it was neither enlarged nor bettered by being baptized
+with the Greek name of philanthropy. With welldoing, however, I went
+more roundly to work, I told my people that I thought they had more sense
+than to secede from Christianity to become Utilitarians; for that it
+would be a confession of ignorance of the faith they deserved, seeing
+that it was the main duty inculcated by our religion to do all in morals
+and manners to which the newfangled doctrine of utility pretended.
+
+These discourses, which I continued for sometime, had no great effect on
+the men; but being prepared in a familiar household manner, they took the
+fancies of the young women, which was to me an assurance that the seed I
+had planted would in time shoot forth; for I reasoned with myself, that
+if the gudeman of the immediate generation should continue free-thinkers,
+their wives will take care that those of the next shall not lack that
+spunk of grace; so I was cheered under that obscurity which fell upon
+Christianity at this time, with a vista beyond, in which I saw, as it
+were, the children unborn, walking on the bright green, and in the
+unclouded splendour of the faith.
+
+But what with the decay of trade, and the temptation of the king’s
+bounty, and, over all, the witlessness that was in the spirit of man at
+this time, the number that enlisted in the course for the year from the
+parish was prodigious. In one week no less than three weavers and two
+cotton-spinners went over to Ayr, and took the bounty of the Royal
+Artillery. But I could not help remarking to myself, that the people
+were grown so used to changes and extraordinary adventures, that the
+single enlistment of Thomas Wilson, at the beginning of the American war,
+occasioned a far greater grief and work among us, than all the swarms
+that went off week after week in the months of November and December of
+this year.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVI
+YEAR 1795
+
+
+THE present Ann. Dom. was ushered in with an event that I had never
+dreaded to see in my day, in our once sober and religious country parish.
+The number of lads that had gone over to Ayr to be soldiers from among
+the spinners and weavers of Cayenneville had been so great, that the
+government got note of it, and sent a recruiting party to be quartered in
+the town; for the term clachan was beginning by this time to wear out of
+fashion: indeed, the place itself was outgrowing the fitness of that
+title. Never shall I forget the dunt that the first tap of the drum gied
+to my heart, as I was sitting on Hansel Monday by myself at the parlour
+fireside, Mrs. Balwhidder being throng with the lassies looking out a
+washing, and my daughter at Ayr, spending a few days with her old
+comrades of the boarding school. I thought it was the enemy; and then
+anon the sound of the fife came shrill to the ear, for the night was lown
+and peaceful. My wife and all the lassies came flying in upon me, crying
+all in the name of heaven, what could it be? by which I was obligated to
+put on my big-coat, and, with my hat and staff, go out to enquire. The
+whole town was aloof, the aged at the doors in clusters, and the bairns
+following the tattoo, as it was called, and at every doubling beat of the
+drum, shouting as if they had been in the face of their foemen.
+
+Mr. Archibald Dozendale, one of my elders, was saying to several persons
+around him, just as I came up, “Hech, sirs! but the battle draws near our
+gates,” upon which there was a heavy sigh from all that heard him; and
+then they told me of the sergeant’s business; and we had a serious
+communing together anent the same. But while we were thus standing
+discoursing on the causey, Mrs. Balwhidder and the servant lassies could
+thole no longer, but in a troop came in quest of me, to hear what was
+doing. In short, it was a night both of sorrow and anxiety. Mr.
+Dozendale walked back to the manse with us, and we had a sober tumbler of
+toddy together; marvelling exceedingly where these fearful portents and
+changes would stop, both of us being of opinion that the end of the world
+was drawing nearer and nearer.
+
+Whether it was, however, that the lads belonging to the place did not
+like to show themselves with the enlistment cockades among their
+acquaintance, or that there was any other reason, I cannot take it upon
+me to say; but certain it is, the recruiting party came no speed, and, in
+consequence, were removed about the end of March.
+
+Another thing happened in this year, too remarkable for me to neglect to
+put on record, as it strangely and strikingly marked the rapid
+revolutions that were going on. In the month of August at the time of
+the fair, a gang of playactors came, and hired Thomas Thacklan’s barn for
+their enactments. They were the first of that clanjamfrey who had ever
+been in the parish; and there was a wonderful excitement caused by the
+rumours concerning them. Their first performance was _Douglas Tragedy_
+and the _Gentle Shepherd_: and the general opinion was, that the lad who
+played Norval in the play, and Patie in the farce, was an English lord’s
+son, who had run away from his parents rather than marry an old cracket
+lady with a great portion. But, whatever truth there might be in this
+notion, certain it is, the whole pack was in a state of perfect beggary;
+and yet, for all that, they not only in their parts, as I was told,
+laughed most heartily, but made others do the same; for I was constrained
+to let my daughter go to see them, with some of her acquaintance; and she
+gave me such an account of what they did, that I thought I would have
+liked to have gotten a keek at them myself. At the same time, I must own
+this was a sinful curiosity, and I stifled it to the best of my ability.
+Among other plays that they did, was one called _Macbeth and the
+Witches_, which the Miss Cayennes had seen performed in London, when they
+were there in the winter time with their father, for three months, seeing
+the world, after coming from the boarding-school. But it was no more
+like the true play of Shakespeare the poet, according to their account,
+than a duddy betheral, set up to fright the sparrows from the peas, is
+like a living gentleman. The hungry players, instead of behaving like
+guests at the royal banquet, were voracious on the needful feast of
+bread, and the strong ale, that served for wine in decanters. But the
+greatest sport of all was about a kail-pot, that acted the part of a
+caldron, and which should have sunk with thunder and lightning into the
+earth; however, it did quite as well, for it made its exit, as Miss
+Virginia said, by walking quietly off, being pulled by a string fastened
+to one of its feet. No scene of the play was so much applauded as this
+one; and the actor who did the part of King Macbeth made a most polite
+bow of thankfulness to the audience, for the approbation with which they
+had received the performance of the pot.
+
+We had likewise, shortly after the “Omnes exeunt” of the players, an
+exhibition of a different sort in the same barn. This was by two English
+quakers, and a quaker lady, tanners of Kendal, who had been at Ayr on
+some leather business, where they preached, but made no proselytes. The
+travellers were all three in a whisky, drawn by one of the best-ordered
+horses, as the hostler at the Cross-Keys told me, ever seen. They came
+to the Inn to their dinner, and meaning to stay all night, sent round, to
+let it be known that they would hold a meeting in Friend Thacklan’s barn;
+but Thomas denied they were either kith or kin to him: this, however, was
+their way of speaking.
+
+In the evening, owing to the notice, a great congregation was assembled
+in the barn, and I myself, along with Mr. Archibald Dozendale, went there
+likewise, to keep the people in awe; for we feared the strangers might be
+jeered and insulted. The three were seated aloft on a high stage,
+prepared on purpose, with two mares and scaffold-deals, borrowed from Mr.
+Trowel the mason. They sat long, and silent; but at last the spirit
+moved the woman, and she rose, and delivered a very sensible exposition
+of Christianity. I was really surprised to hear such sound doctrine; and
+Mr. Dozendale said, justly, that it was more to the purpose than some
+that my younger brethren from Edinburgh endeavoured to teach. So, that
+those who went to laugh at the sincere simplicity of the pious quakers,
+were rebuked by a very edifying discourse on the moral duties of a
+Christian’s life.
+
+Upon the whole, however, this, to the best of my recollection, was
+another unsatisfactory year. In this we were, doubtless, brought more
+into the world; but we had a greater variety of temptation set before us,
+and there was still jealousy and estrangement in the dispositions of the
+gentry, and the lower orders, particularly the manufacturers. I cannot
+say, indeed, that there was any increase of corruption among the rural
+portion of my people; for their vocation calling them to work apart, in
+the purity of the free air of heaven, they were kept uncontaminated by
+that seditious infection which fevered the minds of the sedentary
+weavers, and working like flatulence in the stomachs of the
+cotton-spinners, sent up into their heads a vain and diseased fume of
+infidel philosophy.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVII
+YEAR 1796
+
+
+THE prosperity of fortune is like the blossoms of spring, or the golden
+hue of the evening cloud. It delighteth the spirit, and passeth away.
+
+In the month of February my second wife was gathered to the Lord. She
+had been very ill for some time with an income in her side, which no
+medicine could remove. I had the best doctors in the country side to
+her; but their skill was of no avail, their opinions being that her ail
+was caused by an internal abscess, for which physic has provided no cure.
+Her death was to me a great sorrow; for she was a most excellent wife,
+industrious to a degree, and managed every thing with so brisk a hand,
+that nothing went wrong that she put it to. With her I had grown richer
+than any other minister in the presbytery; but, above all, she was the
+mother of my bairns, which gave her a double claim upon me.
+
+I laid her by the side of my first love, Betty Lanshaw, my own cousin
+that was, and I inscribed her name upon the same headstone; but time had
+drained my poetical vein, and I have not yet been able to indite an
+epitaph on her merits and virtues, for she had an eminent share of both.
+Her greatest fault—the best have their faults—was an over-earnestness to
+gather gear; in the doing of which I thought she sometimes sacrificed the
+comforts of a pleasant fireside; for she was never in her element but
+when she was keeping the servants eident at their work. But, if by this
+she subtracted something from the quietude that was most consonant to my
+nature, she has left cause, both in bank and bond, for me and her bairns
+to bless her great household activity.
+
+She was not long deposited in her place of rest till I had occasion to
+find her loss. All my things were kept by her in a most perjink and
+excellent order; but they soon fell into an amazing confusion; for, as
+she often said to me, I had a turn for heedlessness; insomuch, that
+although my daughter Janet was grown up, and able to keep the house, I
+saw that it would be necessary, as soon as decency would allow, for me to
+take another wife. I was moved to this chiefly by foreseeing that my
+daughter would in time be married, and taken away from me, but more on
+account of the servant lasses, who grew out of all bounds, verifying the
+proverb, “Well kens the mouse when the cat’s out of the house.” Besides
+this, I was now far down in the vale of years, and could not expect to be
+long without feeling some of the penalties of old age, although I was
+still a hail and sound man. It therefore behoved me to look in time for
+a helpmate, to tend me in my approaching infirmities.
+
+Upon this important concern I reflected, as I may say, in the watches of
+the night; and, considering the circumstances of my situation, I saw it
+would not do for me to look out for an overly young woman, nor yet would
+it do for one of my ways to take an elderly maiden, ladies of that sort
+being liable to possess strong-set particularities. I therefore resolved
+that my choice should lie among widows of a discreet age; and I had a
+glimmer in my mind of speaking to Mrs. Malcolm; but when I reflected on
+the saintly steadiness of her character, I was satisfied it would be of
+no use to think of her. Accordingly, I bent my brows, and looked towards
+Irville, which is an abundant trone for widows and other single women;
+and I fixed my purpose on Mrs. Nugent, the relic of a professor in the
+university of Glasgow, both because she was a well-bred woman, without
+any children to plea about the interest of my own two, and likewise
+because she was held in great estimation by all who knew her, as a lady
+of a Christian principle.
+
+It was some time in the summer, however, before I made up my mind to
+speak to her on the subject; but one afternoon, in the month of August, I
+resolved to do so, and with that intent walked leisurely over to Irville;
+and after calling on the Rev. Dr. Dinwiddie, the minister, I stepped in,
+as if by chance, to Mrs. Nugent’s. I could see that she was a little
+surprised at my visit; however, she treated me with every possible
+civility, and her servant lass bringing in the tea-things in a most
+orderly manner, as punctually as the clock was striking, she invited me
+to sit still, and drink my tea with her; which I did, being none
+displeased to get such encouragement. However, I said nothing that time,
+but returned to the manse, very well content with what I had observed,
+which made me fain to repeat my visit. So, in the course of the week,
+taking Janet my daughter with me, we walked over in the forenoon, and
+called at Mrs. Nugent’s first, before going to any other house; and Janet
+saying, as we came out to go to the minister’s, that she thought Mrs.
+Nugent an agreeable woman, I determined to knock the nail on the head
+without further delay.
+
+Accordingly, I invited the minister and his wife to dine with us on the
+Thursday following; and before leaving the town, I made Janet, while the
+minister and me were handling a subject, as a sort of thing in common
+civility, go to Mrs. Nugent, and invite her also. Dr. Dinwiddie was a
+gleg man, of a jocose nature; and he, guessing something of what I was
+ettling at, was very mirthful with me; but I kept my own counsel till a
+meet season.
+
+On the Thursday, the company as invited came, and nothing extraordinary
+was seen; but in cutting up and helping a hen, Dr. Dinwiddie put one wing
+on Mrs. Nugent’s plate, and the other wing on my plate, and said, there
+have been greater miracles than these two wings flying together, which
+was a sharp joke, that caused no little merriment at the expense of Mrs.
+Nugent and me. I, however, to show that I was none daunted, laid a leg
+also on her plate, and took another on my own, saying, in the words of
+the reverend doctor, there have been greater miracles than that these two
+legs should lie in the same nest, which was thought a very clever come
+off; and, at the same time, I gave Mrs. Nugent a kindly nip on her sonsy
+arm, which was breaking the ice in as pleasant a way as could be. In
+short, before anything passed between ourselves on the subject, we were
+set down for a trysted pair; and this being the case, we were married as
+soon as a twelvemonth and a day had passed from the death of the second
+Mrs. Balwhidder; and neither of us have had occasion to rue the bargain.
+It is, however, but a piece of justice due to my second wife to say, that
+this was not a little owing to her good management; for she had left such
+a well-plenished house, that her successor said, we had nothing to do but
+to contribute to one another’s happiness.
+
+In this year nothing more memorable happened in the parish, saving that
+the cotton-mill dam burst about the time of the Lammas flood, and the
+waters went forth like a deluge of destruction, carrying off much
+victual, and causing a vast of damage to the mills that are lower down
+the stream. It was just a prodigy to see how calmly Mr. Cayenne acted on
+that occasion; for, being at other times as crabbed as a wud terrier,
+folk were afraid to tell him, till he came out himself in the morning and
+saw the devastation; at the sight of which he gave only a shrill whistle,
+and began to laugh at the idea of the men fearing to take him the news,
+as if he had not fortune and philosophy enough, as he called it, to
+withstand much greater misfortunes.
+
+ [Picture: The Weaver]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVIII
+YEAR 1797
+
+
+WHEN I have seen in my walks the irrational creatures of God, the birds
+and the beasts, governed by a kindly instinct in attendance on their
+young, often has it come into my head that love and charity, far more
+than reason or justice, formed the tie that holds the world, with all its
+jarring wants and woes, in social dependence and obligation together;
+and, in this year, a strong verification of the soundness of this notion
+was exemplified in the conduct of the poor haverel lassie Meg Gaffaw,
+whose naturality on the occasion of her mother’s death I have related at
+length in this chronicle.
+
+In the course of the summer, Mr. Henry Melcomb, who was a nephew to Mr.
+Cayenne, came down from England to see his uncle. He had just completed
+his education at the college of Christ Church, in Oxford, and was the
+most perfect young gentleman that had ever been seen in this part of the
+country.
+
+In his appearance he was a very paragon, with a fine manly countenance,
+frank-hearted, blithe, and, in many points of character, very like my old
+friend the Lord Eaglesham, who was shot. Indeed, in some respects, he
+was even above his lordship; for he had a great turn at ready wit, and
+could joke and banter in a most agreeable manner. He came very often to
+the manse to see me, and took great pleasure in my company, and really
+used a freedom that was so droll, I could scarcely keep my composity and
+decorum with him. Among others that shared in his attention, was daft
+Meg Gaffaw, whom he had forgathered with one day in coming to see me; and
+after conversing with her for some time, he handed her, as she told me
+herself, over the kirk-stile like a lady of high degree, and came with
+her to the manse door linking by the arm.
+
+From the ill-timed daffin of that hour, poor Meg fell deep in love with
+Mr. Melcomb; and it was just a playacting to see the arts and antics she
+put in practice to win his attention. In her garb, she had never any
+sense of a proper propriety, but went about the country asking for
+shapings of silks and satins, with which she patched her duds, calling
+them by the divers names of robes and negligées. All hitherto, however,
+had been moderation, compared to the daffadile of vanity which she was
+now seen, when she had searched, as she said, to the bottom of her
+coffer. I cannot take it upon me to describe her; but she kythed in such
+a variety of cuffs and ruffles, feathers, old gumflowers, painted paper
+knots, ribbons, and furs, and laces, and went about gecking and simpering
+with an old fan in her hand, that it was not in the power of nature to
+look at her with sobriety.
+
+Her first appearance in this masquerading was at the kirk on the Sunday
+following her adventure with Mr. Melcomb, and it was with a sore
+difficulty that I could keep my eyes off her, even in prayer; and when
+the kirk skailed, she walked before him, spreading all her grandeur to
+catch his eye, in such a manner as had not been seen or heard of since
+the prank that Lady Macadam played Miss Betty Wudrife.
+
+Any other but Mr. Melcomb would have been provoked by the fool’s folly;
+but he humoured her wit, and, to the amazement of the whole people,
+presented her his hand, and allemanded her along in a manner that should
+not have been seen in any street out of a king’s court, and far less on
+the Lord’s day. But, alas! this sport did not last long. Mr. Melcomb
+had come from England to be ‘married’ to his cousin, Miss Virginia
+Cayenne, and poor daft Meg never heard of it till the banns for their
+purpose of marriage was read out by Mr. Lorimore on the Sabbath after.
+The words were scarcely out of his mouth, when the simple and innocent
+natural gave a loud shriek, that terrified the whole congregation, and
+ran out of the kirk demented. There was no more finery for poor Meg; but
+she went and sat opposite to the windows of Mr. Cayenne’s house, where
+Mr. Melcomb was, with clasped hands and beseeching eyes, like a
+monumental statue in alabaster, and no entreaty could drive her away.
+Mr. Melcomb sent her money, and the bride many a fine thing; but Meg
+flung them from her, and clasped her hands again, and still sat. Mr.
+Cayenne would have let loose the house-dog on her, but was not permitted.
+
+In the evening it began to rain, and they thought that and the coming
+darkness would drive her away; but when the servants looked out before
+barring the doors, there she was in the same posture. I was to perform
+the marriage ceremony at seven o’clock in the morning, for the young pair
+were to go that night to Edinburgh; and when I went, there was Meg
+sitting looking at the windows with her hands clasped. When she saw me
+she gave a shrill cry, and took me by the hand, and wised me to go back,
+crying out in a heart-breaking voice, “O, Sir! No yet—no yet! He’ll
+maybe draw back, and think of a far truer bride.” I was wae for her and
+very angry with the servants for laughing at the fond folly of the
+ill-less thing.
+
+When the marriage was over, and the carriage at the door, the bridegroom
+handed in the bride. Poor Meg saw this, and jumping up from where she
+sat, was at his side like a spirit, as he was stepping in, and, taking
+him by the hand, she looked in his face so piteously, that every heart
+was sorrowful, for she could say nothing. When he pulled away his hand,
+and the door was shut, she stood as if she had been charmed to the spot,
+and saw the chaise drive away. All that were about the door then spoke
+to her, but she heard us not. At last she gave a deep sigh, and the
+water coming into her eye, she said, “The worm—the worm is my bonny
+bridegroom, and Jenny with the many-feet my bridal maid. The mill-dam
+water’s the wine o’ the wedding, and the clay and the clod shall be my
+bedding. A lang night is meet for a bridal, but none shall be langer
+than mine.” In saying which words, she fled from among us, with heels
+like the wind. The servants pursued; but long before they could stop
+her, she was past redemption in the deepest plumb of the cotton-mill dam.
+
+Few deaths had for many a day happened in the parish, to cause so much
+sorrow as that of this poor silly creature. She was a sort of household
+familiar among us, and there was much like the inner side of wisdom in
+the pattern of her sayings, many of which are still preserved as
+proverbs.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIX
+YEAR 1798
+
+
+THIS was one of the heaviest years in the whole course of my ministry.
+The spring was slow of coming, and cold and wet when it did come; the
+dibs were full, the roads foul, and the ground that should have been dry
+at the seed-time, was as claggy as clay, and clung to the harrow. The
+labour of man and beast was thereby augmented; and all nature being in a
+state of sluggish indisposition, it was evident to every eye of
+experience that there would be a great disappointment to the hopes of the
+husbandman.
+
+Foreseeing this, I gathered the opinion of all the most sagacious of my
+parishioners, and consulted with them for a provision against the evil
+day, and we spoke to Mr. Cayenne on the subject, for he had a talent by
+common in matters of mercantile management. It was amazing, considering
+his hot temper, with what patience he heard the grounds of our
+apprehension, and how he questioned and sifted the experience of the old
+farmers, till he was thoroughly convinced that all similar seed-times
+were ever followed by a short crop. He then said, that he would prove
+himself a better friend to the parish than he was thought. Accordingly,
+as he afterwards told me himself, he wrote off that very night to his
+correspondents in America, to buy for his account all the wheat and flour
+they could get, and ship it to arrive early in the fall; and he bought up
+likewise in countries round the Baltic great store of victual, and
+brought in two cargoes to Irville on purpose for the parish, against the
+time of need, making for the occasion a garnel of one of the warehouses
+of the cotton-mill.
+
+The event came to pass as had been foretold: the harvest fell short, and
+Mr. Cayenne’s cargoes from America and the Baltic came home in due
+season, by which he made a terrible power of money, clearing thousands on
+thousands by post after post—making more profit, as he said himself, in
+the course of one month, he believed, than ever was made by any
+individual within the kingdom of Scotland in the course of a year.—He
+said, however that he might have made more if he had bought up the corn
+at home; but being convinced by us that there would be a scarcity, he
+thought it his duty as an honest man to draw from the stores and
+granaries of foreign countries, by which he was sure he would serve his
+country, and be abundantly rewarded. In short, we all reckoned him
+another Joseph when he opened his garnels at the cotton-mill, and, after
+distributing a liberal portion to the poor and needy, selling the
+remainder at an easy rate to the generality of the people. Some of the
+neighbouring parishes, however, were angry that he would not serve them
+likewise, and called him a wicked and extortionate forestaller; but he
+made it plain to the meanest capacity, that if he did not circumscribe
+his dispensation to our own bounds it would be as nothing. So that,
+although he brought a wonderful prosperity in by the cotton-mill, and a
+plenteous supply of corn in a time of famine, doing more in these things
+for the people than all the other heritors had done from the beginning of
+time, he was much reviled; even his bounty was little esteemed by my
+people, because he took a moderate profit on what he sold to them.
+Perhaps, however, these prejudices might be partly owing to their dislike
+of his hasty temper, at least I am willing to think so; for it would
+grieve me if they were really ungrateful for a benefit that made the
+pressure of the time lie but lightly on them.
+
+The alarm of the Irish rebellion in this year was likewise another source
+of affliction to us; for many of the gentry coming over in great straits,
+especially ladies and their children, and some of them in the hurry of
+their flight having but little ready money, were very ill off. Some four
+or five families came to the Cross-Keys in this situation, and the
+conduct of Mr. Cayenne to them was most exemplary. He remembered his own
+haste with his family from Virginia, when the Americans rebelled; and
+immediately on hearing of these Irish refugees, he waited on them with
+his wife and daughter, supplied them with money, invited them to his
+house, made ploys to keep up their spirits, while the other gentry stood
+back till they knew something of the strangers.
+
+Among these destitute ladies was a Mrs. Desmond and her two daughters, a
+woman of most august presence, being indeed more like one ordained to
+reign over a kingdom, than for household purposes. The Miss Desmonds
+were only entering their teens, but they also had no ordinary stamp upon
+them. What made this party the more particular, was on account of Mr.
+Desmond, who was supposed to be a united man with the rebels, and it was
+known his son was deep in their plots; yet although this was all told to
+Mr. Cayenne, by some of the other Irish ladies who were of the loyal
+connexion, it made no difference with him, but, on the contrary, he acted
+as if he thought the Desmonds the most of all the refugees entitled to
+his hospitable civilities. This was a wonderment to our strait-laced
+narrow lairds, as there was not a man of such strict government
+principles in the whole country side as Mr. Cayenne: but he said he
+carried his political principles only to the camp and the council. “To
+the hospital and the prison,” said he, “I take those of a man”—which was
+almost a Christian doctrine, and from that declaration Mr. Cayenne and me
+began again to draw a little more cordially together; although he had
+still a very imperfect sense of religion, which I attributed to his being
+born in America, where even as yet, I am told, they have but a scanty
+sprinkling of grace.
+
+But before concluding this year, I should tell the upshot of the
+visitation of the Irish, although it did not take place until some time
+after the peace with France.
+
+In the putting down of the rebels Mr. Desmond and his son made their
+escape to Paris, where they stayed till the treaty was signed, by which,
+for several years after the return to Ireland of the grand lady and her
+daughters, as Mrs. Desmond was called by our commonalty, we heard nothing
+of them. The other refugees repaid Mr. Cayenne his money with
+thankfulness, and, on their restoration to their homes, could not
+sufficiently express their sense of his kindness. But the silence and
+seeming ingratitude of the Desmonds vexed him; and he could not abide to
+hear the Irish rebellion mentioned without flying into a passion against
+the rebels, which every body knew was owing to the ill return he had
+received from that family. However, one afternoon, just about half an
+hour before his wonted dinner hour, a grand equipage, with four horses
+and outriders, stopped at his door, and who was in it but Mrs. Desmond
+and an elderly man, and a young gentleman with an aspect like a lord. It
+was her husband and son. They had come from Ireland in all their state
+on purpose to repay with interest the money Mr. Cayenne had counted so
+long lost, and to express in person the perpetual obligation which he had
+conferred upon the Desmond family, in all time coming. The lady then
+told him, that she had been so straitened in helping the poor ladies,
+that it was not in her power to make repayment till Desmond, as she
+called her husband, came home; and not choosing to assign the true
+reason, lest it might cause trouble, she rather submitted to be suspected
+of ingratitude than to an improper thing.
+
+Mr. Cayenne was transported with this unexpected return, and a friendship
+grew up between the families, which was afterwards cemented into
+relationship by the marriage of the young Desmond with Miss Caroline
+Cayenne. Some in the parish objected to this match, Mrs. Desmond being a
+papist: but as Miss Caroline had received an episcopalian education, I
+thought it of no consequence, and married them after their family
+chaplain from Ireland, as a young couple both by beauty and fortune well
+matched, and deserving of all conjugal felicity.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XL
+YEAR 1799
+
+
+THERE are but two things to make me remember this year; the first was the
+marriage of my daughter Janet with the reverend Dr. Kittlewood of
+Swappington, a match in every way commendable; and on the advice of the
+third Mrs. Balwhidder, I settled a thousand pounds down, and promised
+five hundred more at my death if I died before my spouse, and a thousand
+at her death if she survived me; which was the greatest portion ever
+minister’s daughter had in our country side. In this year likewise I
+advanced fifteen hundred pounds for my son in a concern in Glasgow,—all
+was the gathering of that indefatigable engine of industry the second
+Mrs. Balwhidder, whose talents her successor said were a wonder, when she
+considered the circumstances in which I had been left at her death, and
+made out of a narrow stipend.
+
+The other memorable was the death of Mrs. Malcolm. If ever there was a
+saint on this earth, she was surely one. She had been for some time
+bedfast, having all her days from the date of her widowhood been a tender
+woman; but no change made any alteration on the Christian contentment of
+her mind. She bore adversity with an honest pride; she toiled in the day
+of penury and affliction with thankfulness for her earnings, although
+ever so little. She bent her head to the Lord in resignation when her
+first-born fell in battle; nor was she puffed up with vanity when her
+daughters were married, as it was said, so far above their degree, though
+they showed it was but into their proper sphere by their demeanour after.
+She lived to see her second son, the captain, rise into affluence,
+married, and with a thriving young family; and she had the very great
+satisfaction, on the last day she was able to go to church, to see her
+youngest son the clergyman standing in my pulpit, a doctor of divinity,
+and the placed minister of a richer parish than mine. Well indeed might
+she have said on that day, “Lord, let thy servant depart in peace, for
+mine eyes have seen thy salvation.”
+
+For some time it had been manifest to all who saw her, that her latter
+end was drawing nigh; and therefore, as I had kept up a correspondence
+with her daughters, Mrs. Macadam and Mrs. Howard, I wrote them a
+particular account of her case, which brought them to the clachan. They
+both came in their own carriages; for Colonel Macadam was now a general,
+and had succeeded to a great property by an English uncle, his mother’s
+brother; and Captain Howard, by the death of his father, was also a man,
+as it was said, with a lord’s living. Robert Malcolm, her son the
+captain, was in the West Indies at the time; but his wife came on the
+first summons, as did William the minister.
+
+They all arrived about four o’clock in the afternoon, and at seven a
+message came for me and Mrs. Balwhidder to go over to them, which we did,
+and found the strangers seated by the heavenly patient’s bedside. On my
+entering, she turned her eyes towards me, and said, “Bear witness, sir,
+that I die thankful for an extraordinary portion of temporal mercies.
+The heart of my youth was withered like the leaf that is scared with the
+lightning; but in my children I have received a great indemnification for
+the sorrows of that trial.” She then requested me to pray, saying, “No;
+let it be a thanksgiving. My term is out, and I have nothing more to
+hope or fear from the good or evil of this world. But I have had much to
+make me grateful; therefore, sir, return thanks for the time I have been
+spared, for the goodness granted so long unto me, and the gentle hand
+with which the way from this world is smoothed for my passing.”
+
+There was something so sweet and consolatory in the way she said this,
+that although it moved all present to tears, they were tears without the
+wonted bitterness of grief. Accordingly, I knelt down and did as she had
+required, and there was a great stillness while I prayed. At the
+conclusion we looked to the bed, but the spirit had, in the mean time,
+departed, and there was nothing remaining but the clay tenement.
+
+It was expected by the parish, considering the vast affluence of the
+daughters, that there would have been a grand funeral, and Mrs. Howard
+thought it was necessary; but her sister, who had from her youth upward a
+superior discernment of propriety, said, “No, as my mother has lived, so
+shall be her end.” Accordingly, everybody of any respect in the clachan
+was invited to the funeral; but none of the gentry, saving only such as
+had been numbered among the acquaintance of the deceased. But Mr.
+Cayenne came unbidden, saying to me, that although he did not know Mrs.
+Malcolm personally, he had often heard she was an amiable woman, and
+therefore he thought it a proper compliment to her family, who were out
+of the parish, to show in what respect she was held among us; for he was
+a man that would take his own way, and do what he thought was right,
+heedless alike of blame or approbation.
+
+If, however, the funeral was plain, though respectable, the ladies
+distributed a liberal sum among the poor families; but before they went
+away, a silent token of their mother’s virtue came to light, which was at
+once a source of sorrow and pleasure. Mrs. Malcolm was first well
+provided by the Macadams, afterwards the Howards settled on her an equal
+annuity, by which she spent her latter days in great comfort. Many a
+year before, she had repaid Provost Maitland the money he sent her in the
+day of her utmost distress; and at this period he was long dead, having
+died of a broken heart at the time of his failure. From that time his
+widow and her daughters had been in very straitened circumstances; but
+unknown to all but herself, and HIM from whom nothing is hid, Mrs.
+Malcolm from time to time had sent them, in a blank letter, an occasional
+note to the young ladies to buy a gown. After her death, a bank-bill for
+a sum of money, her own savings, was found in her scrutoire, with a note
+of her own writing pinned to the same, stating, that the amount being
+more than she had needed for herself, belonged of right to those who had
+so generously provided for her; but as they were not in want of such a
+trifle, it would be a token of respect to her memory, if they would give
+the bill to Mrs. Maitland and her daughters, which was done with the most
+glad alacrity; and, in the doing of it, the private kindness was brought
+to light.
+
+ [Picture: The Millwright]
+
+Thus ended the history of Mrs. Malcolm, as connected with our Parish
+Annals. Her house was sold, and is the same now inhabited by the
+millwright, Mr. Periffery; and a neat house it still is, for the
+possessor is an Englishman, and the English have an uncommon taste for
+snod houses and trim gardens; but at the time it was built, there was not
+a better in the town, though it’s now but of the second class. Yearly we
+hear both from Mrs. Macadam and her sister, with a five-pound note from
+each to the poor of the parish, as a token of their remembrance; but they
+are far off, and, were any thing ailing me, I suppose the gift will not
+be continued. As for Captain Malcolm, he has proved, in many ways, a
+friend to such of our young men as have gone to sea. He has now left it
+off himself, and settled at London, where he latterly sailed from, and, I
+understand, is in a great way as a shipowner. These things I have
+thought it fitting to record, and will now resume my historical
+narration.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLI
+YEAR 1800
+
+
+THE same quietude and regularity that marked the progress of the last
+year, continued throughout the whole of this. We sowed and reaped in
+tranquillity, though the sough of distant war came heavily from a
+distance. The cotton-mill did well for the company, and there was a
+sobriety in the minds of the spinners and weavers, which showed that the
+crisis of their political distemperature was over;—there was something
+more of the old prudence in men’s reflections; and it was plain to see
+that the elements of reconciliation were coming together throughout the
+world. The conflagration of the French Revolution was indeed not
+extinguished, but it was evidently burning out; and their old reverence
+for the Grand Monarque was beginning to revive among them, though they
+only called him a consul. Upon the king’s fast I preached on this
+subject; and when the peace was concluded, I got great credit for my
+foresight, but there was no merit in’t. I had only lived longer than the
+most of those around me, and had been all my days a close observer of the
+signs of the times; so that what was lightly called prophecy and
+prediction, were but a probability that experience had taught me to
+discern.
+
+In the affairs of the parish, the most remarkable generality (for we had
+no particular catastrophe) was a great death of old people in the spring.
+Among others, Miss Sabrina, the school mistress, paid the debt of nature,
+but we could now better spare her than we did her predecessor; for at
+Cayenneville there was a broken manufacturer’s wife, an excellent
+teacher, and a genteel and modernised woman, who took the better order of
+children; and Miss Sabrina having been long frail (for she was never
+stout), a decent and discreet carlin, Mrs. M‘Caffie, the widow of a
+custom-house officer, that was a native of the parish, set up another for
+plainer work. Her opposition Miss Sabrina did not mind, but she was
+sorely displeased at the interloping of Mrs. Pirn at Cayenneville, and
+some said it helped to kill her—of that, however, I am not so certain;
+for Dr. Tanzey had told me in the winter, that he thought the sharp winds
+in March would blow out her candle, as it was burnt to the snuff;
+accordingly, she took her departure from this life, on the twenty-fifth
+day of that month, after there had, for some days prior, been a most cold
+and piercing east wind.
+
+Miss Sabrina, who was always an oddity and aping grandeur, it was found,
+had made a will, leaving her gatherings to her favourites, with all
+regular formality. To one she bequeathed a gown, to another this, and a
+third that, and to me a pair of black silk stockings. I was amazed when
+I heard this; but judge what I felt, when a pair of old marrowless
+stockings, darned in the heel, and not whole enough in the legs to make a
+pair of mittens to Mrs. Balwhidder, were delivered to me by her executor,
+Mr. Caption, the lawyer. Saving, however, this kind of flummery, Miss
+Sabrina was a harmless creature, and could quote poetry in discourse more
+glibly than texts of Scripture—her father having spared no pains on her
+mind: as for her body, it could not be mended; but that was not her
+fault.
+
+After her death, the session held a consultation, and we agreed to give
+the same salary that Miss Sabrina enjoyed to Mrs. M‘Caffie, which angered
+Mr. Cayenne, who thought it should have been given to the head mistress;
+and it made him give Mrs. Pirn, out of his own pocket, double the sum.
+But we considered that the parish funds were for the poor of the parish,
+and therefore it was our duty to provide for the instruction of the poor
+children. Saving, therefore, those few notations, I have nothing further
+to say concerning the topics and progress of this Ann. Dom.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLII
+YEAR 1801
+
+
+IT is often to me very curious food for meditation, that as the parish
+increased in population, there should have been less cause for matter to
+record. Things that in former days would have occasioned great discourse
+and cogitation, are forgotten with the day in which they happen; and
+there is no longer that searching into personalities which was so much in
+vogue during the first epoch of my ministry, which I reckon the period
+before the American war; nor has there been any such germinal changes
+among us, as those which took place in the second epoch, counting
+backward from the building of the cotton-mill that gave rise to the town
+of Cayenneville. But still we were not, even at this era, of which this
+Ann. Dom. is the beginning, without occasional personality, or an event
+that deserved to be called a germinal.
+
+Some years before, I had noted among the callans at Mr. Lorimore’s school
+a long soople laddie, who, like all bairns that grow fast and tall, had
+but little smeddum. He could not be called a dolt, for he was observant
+and thoughtful, and giving to asking sagacious questions; but there was a
+sleepiness about him, especially in the kirk, and he gave, as the master
+said, but little application to his lessons, so that folk thought he
+would turn out a sort of gaunt-at-the-door, more mindful of meat than
+work. He was, however, a good-natured lad; and, when I was taking my
+solitary walks of meditation, I sometimes fell in with him sitting alone
+on the brae by the water-side, and sometimes lying on the grass, with his
+hands under his head, on the sunny green knolls where Mr. Cylinder, the
+English engineer belonging to the cotton-work, has built the bonny house
+that he calls Diryhill Cottage. This was when Colin Mavis was a laddie
+at the school, and when I spoke to him, I was surprised at the discretion
+of his answers; so that gradually I began to think and say, that there
+was more about Colin than the neighbours knew. Nothing, however, for
+many a day, came out to his advantage; so that his mother, who was by
+this time a widow woman, did not well know what to do with him, and folk
+pitied her heavy handful of such a droud.
+
+By-and-by, however, it happened that one of the young clerks at the
+cotton-mill shattered his right-hand thumb by a gun bursting; and, being
+no longer able to write, was sent into the army to be an ensign, which
+caused a vacancy in the office; and, through the help of Mr. Cayenne, I
+got Colin Mavis into the place, where, to the surprise of everybody, he
+proved a wonderful eident and active lad, and, from less to more, has
+come at the head of all the clerks, and deep in the confidentials of his
+employers. But although this was a great satisfaction to me, and to the
+widow woman his mother, it somehow was not so much so to the rest of the
+parish, who seemed, as it were, angry that poor Colin had not proved
+himself such a dolt as they had expected and foretold.
+
+Among other ways that Colin had of spending his leisure, was that of
+playing music on an instrument, in which it was said he made a wonderful
+proficiency; but being long and thin, and of a delicate habit of body, he
+was obligated to refrain from this recreation; so he betook himself to
+books, and from reading he began to try writing; but, as this was done in
+a corner, nobody jealoused what he was about, till one evening in this
+year he came to the manse, and asked a word in private with me. I
+thought that perhaps he had fallen in with a lass, and was come to
+consult me anent matrimony; but when we were by ourselves, in my study,
+he took out of his pocket a number of the _Scots Magazine_, and said,
+“Sir, you have been long pleased to notice me more than any other body,
+and when I got this, I could not refrain from bringing it, to let you
+see’t. Ye maun ken, sir, that I have been long in secret given to trying
+my hand at rhyme; and, wishing to ascertain what others thought of my
+power in that way, I sent by the post twa three verses to the _Scots
+Magazine_, and they have not only inserted them, but placed them in the
+body of the book, in such a way that I kenna what to think.” So I looked
+at the Magazine, and read his verses, which were certainly very well-made
+verses for one who had no regular education. But I said to him, as the
+Greenock magistrates said to John Wilson, the author of “Clyde,” when
+they stipulated with him to give up the art, that poem-making was a
+profane and unprofitable trade, and he would do well to turn his talent
+to something of more solidity, which he promised to do; but he has since
+put out a book, whereby he has angered all those that had foretold he
+would be a do-nae-gude. Thus has our parish walked sidy for sidy with
+all the national improvements, having an author of its own, and getting a
+literary character in the ancient and famous republic of letters.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIII
+YEAR 1802
+
+
+“EXPERIENCE teaches fools,” was the first moral apothegm that I wrote in
+small text, when learning to write at the school, and I have ever since
+thought it was a very sensible reflection. For assuredly, as year after
+year has flown away on the swift wings of time, I have found my
+experience mellowing, and my discernment improving; by which I have, in
+the afternoon of life, been enabled to foresee what kings and nations
+would do, by the symptoms manifested within the bounds of the society
+around me. Therefore, at the beginning of the spring in this Ann. Dom.,
+I had misgivings at the heart, a fluttering in my thoughts, and
+altogether a strange uneasiness as to the stability of the peace and
+harmony that was supposed to be founded upon a steadfast foundation
+between us and the French people. What my fears principally took their
+rise from, was a sort of compliancy, on the part of those in power and
+authority, to cultivate the old relations and parts between them and the
+commonalty. It did not appear to me that this proceeded from any known
+or decided event, for I read the papers at this period daily; but from
+some general dread and fear, that was begotten, like a vapour out of the
+fermentation of all sorts of opinions; most people of any sagacity
+thinking that the state of things in France being so much of an antic,
+poetical, and playactor-like guise, that it would never obtain that
+respect, far less that reverence from the world, which is necessary to
+the maintenance of all beneficial government. The consequence of this
+was a great distrust between man and man, and an aching restlessness
+among those who had their bread to bake in the world; persons possessing
+the power to provide for their kindred, forcing them, as it were, down
+the throats of those who were dependent on them in business, a bitter
+morsel.
+
+But the pith of these remarks chiefly applies to the manufacturing
+concerns of the new town of Cayenneville; for in the clachan we lived in
+the lea of the dike, and were more taken up with our own natural rural
+affairs, and the markets for victual, than the craft of merchandise. The
+only man interested in business, who walked in a steady manner at his old
+pace, though he sometimes was seen, being of a spunkie temper, grinding
+the teeth of vexation, was Mr. Cayenne himself.
+
+One day, however, he came to me at the manse. “Doctor,” says he, for so
+he always called me, “I want your advice. I never choose to trouble
+others with my private affairs; but there are times when the word of an
+honest man may do good. I need not tell you, that when I declared myself
+a Royalist in America, it was at a considerable sacrifice. I have,
+however, nothing to complain of against government on that score; but I
+think it damn’d hard that those personal connexions, whose interests I
+preserved to the detriment of my own, should in my old age make such an
+ungrateful return. By the steps I took prior to quitting America, I
+saved the property of a great mercantile concern in London. In return
+for that, they took a share with me, and for me, in the cotton-mill; and
+being here on the spot, as manager, I have both made and saved them
+money. I have, no doubt, bettered my own fortune in the mean time.
+Would you believe it, doctor, they have written a letter to me, saying
+that they wish to provide for a relation, and requiring me to give up to
+him a portion of my share in the concern—a pretty sort of providing this,
+at another man’s expense! But I’ll be damn’d if I do any such thing! If
+they want to provide for their friend, let them do so from themselves,
+and not at my cost—What is your opinion?”
+
+This appeared to me a very weighty concern, and, not being versed in
+mercantile dealing, I did not well know what to say; but I reflected for
+some time, and then I replied, “As far, Mr. Cayenne, as my observation
+has gone in this world, I think that the giffs and the gaffs nearly
+balance one another; and when they do not, there is a moral defect on the
+failing side. If a man long gives his labour to his employer, and is
+paid for that labour, it might be said that both are equal; but I say no.
+For it’s in human nature to be prompt to change; and the employer, having
+always more in his power than his servant or agent, it seems to me a
+clear case, that in the course of a number of years, the master of the
+old servant is the obligated of the two; and therefore I say, in the
+first place, in your case there is no tie or claim, by which you may, in
+a moral sense, be called upon to submit to the dictates of your London
+correspondents; but there is a reason, in the nature of the thing and
+case, by which you may ask a favour from them—So, the advice I would give
+you would be this: write an answer to their letter, and tell them that
+you have no objection to the taking in of a new partner, but you think it
+would be proper to revise all the copartnery, especially as you have,
+considering the manner in which you have advanced the business, been of
+opinion, that your share should be considerably enlarged.”
+
+I thought Mr. Cayenne would have louped out of his skin with mirth at
+this notion; and, being a prompt man, he sat down at my scrutoire, and
+answered the letter which gave him so much uneasiness. No notice was
+taken of it for some time; but in the course of a month he was informed,
+that it was not considered expedient at that time to make any change in
+the company. I thought the old man was gone by himself when he got this
+letter. He came over instantly in his chariot, from the cotton-mill
+office to the manse, and swore an oath, by some dreadful name, that I was
+a Solomon. However, I only mention this to show how experience had
+instructed me, and as a sample of that sinister provisioning of friends
+that was going on in the world at this time—all owing, as I do verily
+believe, to the uncertain state of governments and national affairs.
+
+Besides these generalities, I observed another thing working to
+effect—mankind read more, and the spirit of reflection and reasoning was
+more awake than at any time within my remembrance. Not only was there a
+handsome bookseller’s shop in Cayenneville, with a London newspaper
+daily, but magazines, and reviews, and other new publications.
+
+Till this year, when a chaise was wanted we had to send to Irville; but
+Mr. Toddy of the Cross-Keys being in at Glasgow, he bought an excellent
+one at the second-hand, a portion of the effects of a broken merchant, by
+which, from that period, we had one of our own, and it proved a great
+convenience; for I, who never but twice in my life before hired that kind
+of commodity, had it thrice during the summer, for a bit jaunt with Mrs.
+Balwhidder to divers places and curiosities in the county that I had not
+seen before, by which our ideas were greatly enlarged; indeed, I have
+always had a partiality for travelling, as one of the best means of
+opening the faculty of the mind, and giving clear and correct notions of
+men and things.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIV
+YEAR 1803
+
+
+DURING the tempestuous times that ensued, from the death of the King of
+France by the hands of the executioner in 1793, there had been a
+political schism among my people that often made me very uneasy. The
+folk belonging to the cotton-mill, and the muslin-weavers in
+Cayenneville, were afflicted with the itch of jacobinism, but those of
+the village were stanch and true to king and country; and some of the
+heritors were desirous to make volunteers of the young men of them, in
+case of anything like the French anarchy and confusion rising on the side
+of the manufacturers. I, however, set myself, at that time, against
+this, for I foresaw that the French business was but a fever which would
+soon pass off; but no man could tell the consequence of putting arms in
+the hands of neighbour against neighbour, though it was but in the way of
+policy.
+
+But when Bonaparte gathered his host fornent the English coast, and the
+government at London were in terror of their lives for an invasion, all
+in the country saw that there was danger, and I was not backward in
+sounding the trumpet to battle. For a time, however, there was a
+diffidence among us somewhere. The gentry had a distrust of the
+manufacturers, and the farming lads were wud with impatience, that those
+who should be their leaders would not come forth. I, knowing this,
+prepared a sermon suitable to the occasion, giving out from the pulpit
+myself, the Sabbath before preaching it, that it was my intent, on the
+next Lord’s day, to deliver a religious and political exhortation on the
+present posture of public affairs. This drew a vast congregation of all
+ranks.
+
+I trow that the stoor had no peace in the stuffing of the pulpit in that
+day; and the effect was very great and speedy: for next morning the
+weavers and cotton-mill folk held a meeting, and they, being skilled in
+the ways of committees and associating together, had certain resolutions
+prepared, by which a select few was appointed to take an enrolment of all
+willing in the parish to serve as volunteers in defence of their king and
+country, and to concert with certain gentlemen named therein, about the
+formation of a corps, of which, it was an understood thing, the said
+gentlemen were to be the officers. The whole of this business was
+managed with the height of discretion; and the weavers, and spinners, and
+farming lads, vied with one another who should be first on the list. But
+that which the most surprised me, was the wonderful sagacity of the
+committee in naming the gentlemen that should be the officers. I could
+not have made a better choice myself; for they were the best built, the
+best bred, and the best natured, in the parish. In short, when I saw the
+bravery that was in my people, and the spirit of wisdom by which it was
+directed, I said in my heart, the Lord of Hosts is with us, and the
+adversary shall not prevail.
+
+ [Picture: The Silhouette]
+
+The number of valiant men which at that time placed themselves around the
+banners of their country was so great, that the government would not
+accept of all who offered; so, like as in other parishes, we were
+obligated to make a selection, which was likewise done in a most
+judicious manner, all men above a certain age being reserved for the
+defence of the parish, in the day when the young might be called to
+England to fight the enemy.
+
+When the corps was formed, and the officers named, they made me their
+chaplain, and Dr. Marigold their doctor. He was a little man with a big
+belly, and was as crouse as a bantam cock; but it was not thought he
+could do so well in field exercises, on which account he was made the
+doctor, although he had no repute in that capacity in comparison with Dr.
+Tanzey, who was not, however, liked, being a stiff-mannered man, with a
+sharp temper.
+
+All things having come to a proper head, the young ladies of the parish
+resolved to present the corps with a stand of colours, which they
+embroidered themselves, and a day was fixed for the presentation of the
+same. Never was such a day seen in Dalmailing. The sun shone brightly
+on that scene of bravery and grandeur, and far and near the country folk
+came flocking in; and we had the regimental band of music hired from the
+soldiers that were in Ayr barracks. The very first sound o’t made the
+hair on my old grey head to prickle up, and my blood to rise and glow as
+if youth was coming again into my veins.
+
+Sir Hugh Montgomerie was the commandant; and he came in all the glory of
+war, on his best horse, and marched at the head of the men to the
+green-head. The doctor and me were the rearguard: not being able, on
+account of my age and his fatness, to walk so fast as the quick-step of
+the corps. On the field, we took our place in front, near Sir Hugh and
+the ladies with the colours; and after some salutations, according to the
+fashion of the army, Sir Hugh made a speech to the men, and then Miss
+Maria Montgomerie came forward, with her sister Miss Eliza, and the other
+ladies, and the banners were unfurled, all glittering with gold, and the
+king’s arms in needlework. Miss Maria then made a speech, which she had
+got by heart; but she was so agitated that it was said she forgot the
+best part of it: however, it was very well considering. When this was
+done, I then stepped forward, and laying my hat on the ground, every man
+and boy taking off theirs, I said a prayer, which I had conned most
+carefully, and which I thought the most suitable I could devise, in
+unison with Christian principles, which are averse to the shedding of
+blood; and I particularly dwelt upon some of the specialities of our
+situation.
+
+When I had concluded, the volunteers gave three great shouts, and the
+multitude answered them to the same tune, and all the instruments of
+music sounded, making such a bruit as could not be surpassed for
+grandeur—a long, and very circumstantial account of all which, may be
+read in the newspapers of that time.
+
+The volunteers, at the word of command, then showed us the way they were
+to fight with the French, in the doing of which a sad disaster happened;
+for when they were charging bayonets, they came towards us like a flood,
+and all the spectators ran; and I ran, and the doctor ran; but being
+laden with his belly, he could not run fast enough, so he lay down, and
+being just before me at the time, I tumbled over him, and such a shout of
+laughter shook the field as was never heard.
+
+When the fatigues of the day were at an end, we marched to the
+cotton-mill, where, in one of the ware-houses, a vast table was spread,
+and a dinner, prepared at Mr. Cayenne’s own expense, sent in from the
+Cross-Keys, and the whole corps, with many of the gentry of the
+neighbourhood, dined with great jollity, the band of music playing
+beautiful airs all the time. At night there was a universal dance,
+gentle and semple mingled together. All which made it plain to me, that
+the Lord, by this unison of spirit, had decreed our national
+preservation; but I kept this in my own breast, lest it might have the
+effect to relax the vigilance of the kingdom. And I should note that
+Colin Mavis, the poetical lad, of whom I have spoken in another part,
+made a song for this occasion that was very mightily thought of, having
+in it a nerve of valiant genius, that kindled the very souls of those
+that heard it.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLV
+YEAR 1804
+
+
+IN conformity with the altered fashions of the age, in this year the
+session came to an understanding with me, that we should not inflict the
+common church censures for such as made themselves liable thereto; but we
+did not formally promulge our resolution as to this, wishing as long as
+possible to keep the deterring rod over the heads of the young and
+thoughtless. Our motive, on the one hand, was the disregard of the
+manufacturers in Cayenneville, who were, without the breach of truth, an
+irreligious people; and, on the other, a desire to preserve the ancient
+and wholesome admonitory and censorian jurisdiction of the minister and
+elders. We therefore laid it down as a rule to ourselves, that, in the
+case of transgressions on the part of the inhabitants of the new district
+of Cayenneville, we should subject them rigorously to a fine; but that
+for the farming-lads, we would put it in their option to pay the fine, or
+stand in the kirk.
+
+We conformed also in another matter to the times, by consenting to
+baptize occasionally in private houses. Hitherto it had been a strict
+rule with me only to baptize from the pulpit. Other parishes, however,
+had long been in the practice of this relaxation of ancient discipline.
+
+But all this on my part, was not done without compunction of spirit; for
+I was of opinion, that the principle of Presbyterian integrity should
+have been maintained to the uttermost. Seeing, however, the elders set
+on an alteration, I distrusted my own judgment, and yielded myself to the
+considerations that weighed with them; for they were true men, and of a
+godly honesty, and took the part of the poor in all contentions with the
+heritors, often to the hazard and damage of their own temporal welfare.
+
+I have now to note a curious thing, not on account of its importance, but
+to show to what lengths a correspondence had been opened in the parish
+with the farthest parts of the earth. Mr. Cayenne got a turtle-fish sent
+to him from a Glasgow merchant, and it was living when it came to the
+Wheatrig House, and was one of the most remarkable beasts that had ever
+been seen in our country side. It weighed as much as a well-fed calf,
+and had three kinds of meat in its body, fish, flesh, and fowl, and it
+had four water-wings, for they could not be properly called fins; but
+what was little short of a miracle about the creature, happened after the
+head was cutted off, when, if a finger was offered to it, it would open
+its mouth and snap at it, and all this after the carcass was divided for
+dressing.
+
+Mr. Cayenne made a feast on the occasion to many of the neighbouring
+gentry, to the which I was invited; and we drank lime-punch as we ate the
+turtle, which, as I understand, is the fashion in practice among the
+Glasgow West Indy merchants, who are famed as great hands with turtles
+and lime-punch. But it is a sort of food that I should not like to fare
+long upon. I was not right the next day; and I have heard it said, that
+when eaten too often, it has a tendency to harden the heart and make it
+crave for greater luxuries.
+
+But the story of the turtle is nothing to that of the Mass, which, with
+all its mummeries and abominations, was brought into Cayenneville by an
+Irish priest of the name of Father O’Grady, who was confessor to some of
+the poor deluded Irish labourers about the new houses and the
+cotton-mill. How he had the impudence to set up that memento of Satan,
+the crucifix, within my parish and jurisdiction, was what I never could
+get to the bottom of; but the soul was shaken within me, when, on the
+Monday after, one of the elders came to the manse, and told me that the
+old dragon of Popery, with its seven heads and ten horns, had been
+triumphing in Cayenneville on the foregoing Lord’s day! I lost no time
+in convening the session to see what was to be done; much, however, to my
+surprise, the elders recommended no step to be taken, but only a zealous
+endeavour to greater Christian excellence on our part, by which we should
+put the beast and his worshippers to shame and flight. I am free to
+confess, that, at the time, I did not think this the wisest counsel which
+they might have given; for, in the heat of my alarm, I was for attacking
+the enemy in his camp. But they prudently observed, that the days of
+religious persecution were past, and it was a comfort to see mankind
+cherishing any sense of religion at all, after the vehement infidelity
+that had been sent abroad by the French Republicans; and to this opinion,
+now that I have had years to sift its wisdom, I own myself a convert and
+proselyte.
+
+Fortunately, however, for my peace of mind, there proved to be but five
+Roman Catholics in Cayenneville; and Father O’Grady not being able to
+make a living there, packed up his Virgin Marys, saints, and painted
+Agneses in a portmanteau, and went off in the Ayr fly one morning for
+Glasgow, where I hear he has since met with all the encouragement that
+might be expected from the ignorant and idolatrous inhabitants of that
+great city.
+
+Scarcely were we well rid of Father O’Grady, when another interloper
+entered the parish. He was more dangerous, in the opinion of the
+session, than even the Pope of Rome himself; for he came to teach the
+flagrant heresy of Universal Redemption, a most consolatory doctrine to
+the sinner that is loth to repent, and who loves to troll his iniquity
+like a sweet morsel under his tongue. Mr. Martin Siftwell, who was the
+last ta’en on elder, and who had received a liberal and judicious
+education, and was, moreover, naturally possessed of a quick penetration,
+observed, in speaking of this new doctrine, that the grossest papist
+sinner might have some qualms of fear after he had bought the Pope’s
+pardon, and might thereby be led to a reformation of life; but that the
+doctrine of universal redemption was a bribe to commit sin, the wickedest
+mortal, according to it, being only liable to a few thousand years, more
+or less, of suffering, which, compared with eternity, was but a momentary
+pang, like having a tooth drawn for the toothache. Mr. Siftwell is a
+shrewd and clear-seeing man in points of theology, and I would trust a
+great deal to what he says, as I have not, at my advanced age, such a
+mind for the kittle crudities of polemical investigation that I had in my
+younger years, especially when I was a student in the Divinity Hall of
+Glasgow.
+
+It will be seen from all I have herein recorded, that, in the course of
+this year, there was a general resuscitation of religious sentiments; for
+what happened in my parish was but a type and index to the rest of the
+world. We had, however, one memorable that must stand by itself; for
+although neither death nor bloodshed happened, yet was it cause of the
+fear of both.
+
+A rumour reached us from the Clyde, that a French man-of-war had appeared
+in a Highland loch, and that all the Greenock volunteers had embarked in
+merchant vessels to bring her in for a prize. Our volunteers were just
+jumping and yowling, like chained dogs, to be at her too; but the
+colonel, Sir Hugh, would do nothing without orders from his superiors.
+Mr. Cayenne, though an aged man above seventy, was as bold as a lion, and
+came forth in the old garb of an American huntsman, like, as I was told,
+a Robin Hood in the play is; and it was just a sport to see him, feckless
+man, trying to march so crousely with his lean, shaking hands. But the
+whole affair proved a false alarm, and our men, when they heard it, were
+as well pleased that they had been constrained to sleep in their warm
+beds at home, instead of lying on coils of cables, like the gallant
+Greenock sharp-shooters.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVI
+YEAR 1805
+
+
+FOR some time I had meditated a reformation in the parish, and this year
+I carried the same into effect. I had often noticed with concern, that,
+out of a mistaken notion of paying respect to the dead, my people were
+wont to go to great lengths at their burials, and dealt round short-bread
+and sugar-biscuit, with wine and other confections, as if there had been
+no ha’d in their hands; which straitened many a poor family, making the
+dispensation of the Lord a heavier temporal calamity than it should
+naturally have been. Accordingly, on consulting with Mrs. Balwhidder,
+who has a most judicious judgment, it was thought that my interference
+would go a great way to lighten the evil. I therefore advised with those
+whose friends were taken from them, not to make that amplitude of
+preparation which used to be the fashion, nor to continue handing about
+as long as the folk would take, but only at the very most to go no more
+than three times round with the service. Objections were made to this,
+as if it would be thought mean; but I put on a stern visage, and told
+them, that if they did more I would rise up, and rebuke and forbid the
+extravagance. So three services became the uttermost modicum at all
+burials. This was doing much, but it was not all that I wished to do.
+
+I considered that the best reformations are those which proceed step by
+step, and stop at that point where the consent to what has been
+established becomes general; and so I governed myself, and therefore
+interfered no farther; but I was determined to set an example.
+Accordingly, at the very next dregy, after I partook of one service, I
+made a bow to the servitors and they passed on, but all before me had
+partaken of the second service; some, however, of those after me did as I
+did, so I foresaw that in a quiet canny way I would bring in the fashion
+of being satisfied with one service. I therefore, from that time, always
+took my place as near as possible to the door, where the chief mourner
+sat, and made a point of nodding away the second service, which has now
+grown into a custom, to the great advantage of surviving relations.
+
+But in this reforming business I was not altogether pleased with our
+poet; for he took a pawkie view of my endeavours, and indited a ballad on
+the subject, in the which he makes a clattering carlin describe what took
+place, so as to turn a very solemn matter into a kind of derision. When
+he brought his verse and read it to me, I told him that I thought it was
+overly natural; for I could not find another term to designate the cause
+of the dissatisfaction that I had with it; but Mrs. Balwhidder said that
+it might help my plan if it were made public; so upon her advice we got
+some of Mr. Lorimore’s best writers to make copies of it for
+distribution, which was not without fruit and influence. But a sore
+thing happened at the very next burial. As soon as the nodding away of
+the second service began, I could see that the gravity of the whole
+meeting was discomposed; and some of the irreverent young chiels almost
+broke out into even-down laughter, which vexed me exceedingly. Mrs.
+Balwhidder, howsoever, comforted me by saying, that custom in time would
+make it familiar, and by-and-by the thing would pass as a matter of
+course, until one service would be all that folk would offer; and truly
+the thing is coming to that, for only two services are now handed round,
+and the second is regularly nodded by.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVII
+YEAR 1806
+
+
+MR. CAYENNE of Wheatrig having for several years been in a declining way,
+partly brought on by the consuming fire of his furious passion, and
+partly by the decay of old age, sent for me on the evening of the first
+Sabbath of March in this year. I was surprised at the message, and went
+to the Wheatrig House directly, where, by the lights in the windows as I
+gaed up through the policy to the door, I saw something extraordinary was
+going on. Sambo, the blackamoor servant, opened the door, and, without
+speaking, shook his head; for it was an affectionate creature, and as
+fond of his master as if he had been his own father. By this sign I
+guessed that the old gentleman was thought to be drawing near his latter
+end; so I walked softly after Sambo up the stair, and was shown into the
+chamber where Mr. Cayenne, since he had been confined to the house,
+usually sat. His wife had been dead some years before.
+
+Mr. Cayenne was sitting in his easy chair, with a white cotton nightcap
+on his head, and a pillow at his shoulders to keep him straight. But his
+head had fallen down on his breast, and he breathed like a panting baby.
+His legs were swelled, and his feet rested on a footstool. His face,
+which was wont to be the colour of a peony rose, was of a yellow hue,
+with a patch of red on each cheek like a wafer; and his nose was shirpit
+and sharp, and of an unnatural purple. Death was evidently fighting with
+nature for the possession of the body. “Heaven have mercy on his soul!”
+said I to myself, as I sat down beside him.
+
+When I had been seated some time, the power was given him to raise his
+head as it were a-jee; and he looked at me with the tail of his eye,
+which I saw was glittering and glassy. “Doctor,” for he always called me
+doctor, though I am not of that degree, “I am glad to see you,” were his
+words, uttered with some difficulty.
+
+“How do you find yourself, sir?” I replied, in a sympathising manner.
+
+“Damned bad,” said he, as if I had been the cause of his suffering. I
+was daunted to the very heart to hear him in such an unregenerate state;
+but after a short pause I addressed myself to him again, saying, that “I
+hoped he would soon be more at ease; and he should bear in mind that the
+Lord chasteneth whom he loveth.”
+
+“The devil take such love!” was his awful answer, which was to me as a
+blow on the forehead with a mell. However, I was resolved to do my duty
+to the miserable sinner, let him say what he would. Accordingly, I
+stooped towards him with my hands on my knees, and said in a
+compassionate voice, “It’s very true, sir, that you are in great agony;
+but the goodness of God is without bound.”
+
+“Curse me if I think so, doctor!” replied the dying uncircumcised
+Philistine. But he added at whiles, his breathlessness being grievous,
+and often broken by a sore hiccup, “I am, however, no saint, as you know,
+doctor; so I wish you to put in a word for me, doctor; for you know that
+in these times, doctor, it is the duty of every good subject to die a
+Christian.”
+
+This was a poor account of the state of his soul; but it was plain I
+could make no better o’t, by entering into any religious discourse or
+controversy with him, he being then in the last gasp; so I knelt down and
+prayed for him with great sincerity, imploring the Lord, as an awakening
+sense of grace to the dying man, that it would please him to lift up,
+though it were but for the season of a minute, the chastening hand which
+was laid so heavily upon his aged servant; at which Mr. Cayenne, as if,
+indeed, the hand had been then lifted, cried out, “None of that stuff,
+doctor; you know that I cannot call myself his servant.”
+
+ [Picture: The Ruling Elder]
+
+Was ever a minister in his prayer so broken in upon by a perishing
+sinner! However, I had the weight of a duty upon me, and made no reply,
+but continued, “Thou hearest, O Lord, how he confesses his unworthiness!
+Let not thy compassion, therefore, be withheld, but verify to him the
+words that I have spoken in faith, of the boundlessness of thy goodness,
+and the infinite multitude of thy tender mercies.” I then calmly, but
+sadly, sat down, and presently, as if my prayer had been heard, relief
+was granted; for Mr. Cayenne raised his head, and giving me a queer look,
+said, “That last clause of your petition, doctor, was well put, and I
+think, too, it has been granted, for I am easier”—adding, “I have no
+doubt, doctor, given much offence in the world, and oftenest when I meant
+to do good; but I have wilfully injured no man; and as God is my judge,
+and his goodness, you say, is so great, he may, perhaps, take my soul
+into his holy keeping.” In saying which words, Mr. Cayenne dropped his
+head upon his breast, his breathing ceased, and he was wafted away out of
+this world with as little trouble as a blameless baby.
+
+This event soon led to a change among us. In the settling of Mr.
+Cayenne’s affairs in the Cotton-mill Company, it was found that he had
+left such a power of money, that it was needful to the concern, in order
+that they might settle with the doers under his testament, to take in
+other partners. By this Mr. Speckle came to be a resident in the parish,
+he having taken up a portion of Mr. Cayenne’s share. He likewise took a
+tack of the house and policy of Wheatrig. But although Mr. Speckle was a
+far more conversible man than his predecessor, and had a wonderful
+plausibility in business, the affairs of the company did not thrive in
+his hands. Some said this was owing to his having owre many irons in the
+fire; others, to the circumstances of the times: in my judgment, however,
+both helped; but the issue belongs to the events of another year. In the
+meanwhile, I should here note, that in the course of this current Ann.
+Dom. it pleased Heaven to visit me with a severe trial; the nature of
+which I will here record at length—the upshot I will make known
+hereafter.
+
+From the planting of inhabitants in the cotton-mill town of Cayenneville,
+or as the country folk, not used to used to such lang-nebbit words, now
+call it, Canaille, there had come in upon the parish various sectarians
+among the weavers, some of whom were not satisfied with the gospel as I
+preached it, and endeavoured to practise it in my walk and conversation;
+and they began to speak of building a kirk for themselves, and of getting
+a minster that would give them the gospel more to their own ignorant
+fancies. I was exceedingly wroth and disturbed when the thing was first
+mentioned to me; and I very earnestly, from the pulpit, next Lord’s day,
+lectured on the growth of newfangled doctrines; which, however, instead
+of having the wonted effect of my discourses, set up the theological
+weavers in a bleeze, and the very Monday following they named a
+committee, to raise money by subscription to build a meeting-house. This
+was the first overt act of insubordination, collectively manifested, in
+the parish; and it was conducted with all that crafty dexterity with
+which the infidel and jacobin spirit of the French Revolution had
+corrupted the honest simplicity of our good old hameward fashions. In
+the course of a very short time, the Canaille folk had raised a large
+sum, and seduced not a few of my people into their schism, by which they
+were enabled to set about building their kirk; the foundations thereof
+were not, however, laid till the following year, but their proceedings
+gave me a het heart, for they were like an open rebellion to my
+authority, and a contemptuous disregard of that religious allegiance
+which is due from the flock to the pastor.
+
+On Christmas-day the wind broke off the main arm of our Adam and Eve
+pear-tree; and I grieved for it more as a type and sign of the threatened
+partition, than on account of the damage, though the fruit was the
+juiciest in all the country side.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVIII
+YEAR 1807
+
+
+THIS was a year to me of satisfaction in many points; for a greater
+number of my younger flock married in it, than had done for any one of
+ten years prior. They were chiefly the offspring of the marriages that
+took place at the close of the American war; and I was pleased to see the
+duplification of well-doing, as I think marrying is, having always
+considered the command to increase and multiply, a holy ordinance, which
+the circumstances of this world but too often interfere to prevent.
+
+It was also made manifest to me, that in this year there was a very
+general renewal in the hearts of men, of a sense of the utility, even in
+earthly affairs, of a religious life: in some, I trust it was more than
+prudence, and really a birth of grace. Whether this was owing to the
+upshot of the French Revolution, all men being pretty well satisfied in
+their minds, that uproar and rebellion make but an ill way of righting
+wrongs, or that the swarm of unruly youth the offspring, as I have said,
+of the marriages after the American war, had grown sobered from their
+follies, and saw things in a better light, I cannot take upon me to say.
+But it was very edifying to me, their minister, to see several lads who
+had been both wild and free in their principles, marrying with sobriety,
+and taking their wives to the kirk with the comely decorum of heads of
+families.
+
+But I was now growing old, and could go seldomer out among my people than
+in former days; so that I was less a partaker of their ploys and
+banquets, either at birth, bridal, or burial. I heard, however, all that
+went on at them, and I made it a rule, after giving the blessing at the
+end of the ceremony, to admonish the bride and bridegroom to ca’ canny,
+and join trembling with their mirth. It behoved me on one occasion,
+however, to break through a rule that age and frailty had imposed upon
+me, and to go to the wedding of Tibby Banes, the daughter of the
+betheral, because she had once been a servant in the manse, besides the
+obligation upon me, from her father’s part both in the kirk and kirkyard.
+Mrs. Balwhidder went with me, for she liked to countenance the
+pleasantries of my people; and, over and above all, it was a pay-wedding,
+in order to set up the bridegroom in a shop.
+
+There was, to be sure, a great multitude, gentle and semple, of all
+denominations, with two fiddles and a bass, and the volunteers’ fife and
+drum; and the jollity that went on was a perfect feast of itself, though
+the wedding-supper was a prodigy of abundance. The auld carles kecklet
+with fainness as they saw the young dancers; and the carlins sat on
+forms, as mim as May puddocks, with their shawls pinned apart, to show
+their muslin napkins. But, after supper, when they had got a glass of
+the punch, their heels showed their mettle, and grannies danced with
+their oyes, holding out their hands as if they had been spinning with two
+rocks. I told Colin Mavis, the poet, than an _Infare_ was a fine subject
+for his muse; and soon after he indited an excellent ballad under that
+title, which he projects to publish, with other ditties, by subscription;
+and I have no doubt a liberal and discerning public will give him all
+manner of encouragement, for that is the food of talent of every kind;
+and without cheering, no one can say what an author’s faculty naturally
+is.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIX
+YEAR 1808
+
+
+THROUGH all the wars that have raged from the time of the King’s
+accession to the throne, there has been a gradually coming nearer and
+nearer to our gates, which is a very alarming thing to think of. In the
+first, at the time he came to the crown, we suffered nothing. Not one
+belonging to the parish was engaged in the battles thereof; and the news
+of victories, before they reached us, which was generally by word of
+mouth, were old tales. In the American war, as I have related at length,
+we had an immediate participation; but those that suffered were only a
+few individuals, and the evil was done at a distance, and reached us not
+until the worst of its effects were spent. And during the first term of
+the present just and necessary contest for all that is dear to us as a
+people, although, by the offswarming of some of our restless youth, we
+had our part and portion in common with the rest of the Christian world;
+yet still there was at home a great augmentation of prosperity, and every
+thing had thriven in a surprising manner; somewhat, however, to the
+detriment of our country simplicity. By the building of the cotton-mill,
+and the rising up of the new town of Cayenneville, we had intromitted so
+much with concerns of trade, that we were become a part of the great web
+of commercial reciprocities, and felt in our corner and extremity, every
+touch or stir that was made on any part of the texture. The consequence
+of this I have now to relate.
+
+Various rumours had been floating about the business of the cotton
+manufacturers not being so lucrative as it had been; and Bonaparte, as it
+is well known, was a perfect limb of Satan against our prosperity, having
+recourse to the most wicked means and purposes to bring ruin upon us as a
+nation. His cantrips, in this year, began to have a dreadful effect.
+
+For some time it had been observed in the parish, that Mr. Specle of the
+cotton-mill, went very often to Glasgow, and was sometimes off at a few
+minutes’ warning to London; and the neighbours began to guess and wonder
+at what could be the cause of all this running here, and riding there, as
+if the little-gude was at his heels. Sober folk augured ill o’t; and it
+was remarked, likewise, that there was a haste and confusion in his mind,
+which betokened a foretaste of some change of fortune. At last, in the
+fulness of time, the babe was born.
+
+On a Saturday night, Mr. Speckle came out late from Glasgow; on the
+Sabbath he was with all his family at the kirk, looking as a man that had
+changed his way of life; and on the Monday, when the spinners went to the
+mill, they were told that the company had stopped payment. Never did a
+thunder-clap daunt the heart like this news; for the bread in a moment
+was snatched from more than a thousand mouths. It was a scene not to be
+described, to see the cotton-spinners and the weavers, with their wives
+and children, standing in bands along the road, all looking and speaking
+as if they had lost a dear friend or parent. For my part, I could not
+bear the sight, but hid myself in my closet, and prayed to the Lord to
+mitigate a calamity which seemed to me past the capacity of man to
+remedy; for what could our parish fund do in the way of helping a whole
+town, thus suddenly thrown out of bread?
+
+In the evening, however, I was strengthened, and convened the elders at
+the manse to consult with them on what was best to be done; for it was
+well known that the sufferers had made no provision for a sore foot. But
+all our gathered judgments could determine nothing; and therefore we
+resolved to wait the issue, not doubting but that He who sends the night,
+would bring the day in His good and gracious time, which so fell out.
+Some of them who had the largest experience of such vicissitudes,
+immediately began to pack up their ends and their awls, and to hie them
+into Glasgow and Paisley in quest of employ; but those who trusted to the
+hopes that Mr. Speckle himself still cherished, lingered long, and were
+obligated to submit to sore distress. After a time, however, it was
+found that the company was ruined; and the mill being sold for the
+benefit of the creditors, it was bought by another Glasgow company, who,
+by getting a good bargain, and managing well, have it still, and have
+made it again a blessing to the country. At the time of the stoppage,
+however, we saw that commercial prosperity, flush as it might be, was but
+a perishable commodity, and from thence, both by public discourse and
+private exhortation, I have recommended to the workmen to lay up
+something for a reverse; and showed that, by doing with their bawbees and
+pennies what the great do with their pounds, they might in time get a
+pose to help them in the day of need. This advice they have followed,
+and made up a Savings Bank, which is a pillow of comfort to many an
+industrious head of a family.
+
+But I should not close this account of the disaster that befell Mr.
+Speckle, and the cotton-mill company, without relating a very melancholy
+case that was the consequence. Among the overseers there was a Mr.
+Dwining, an Englishman from Manchester, where he had seen better days,
+having had himself there of his own property, once as large a mill,
+according to report, as the Cayenneville mill. He was certainly a man
+above the common, and his wife was a lady in every point; but they held
+themselves by themselves, and shunned all manner of civility, giving up
+their whole attention to their two little boys, who were really like
+creatures of a better race than the callans of our clachan.
+
+On the failure of the company, Mr. Dwining was observed by those who were
+present to be particularly distressed: his salary being his all; but he
+said little, and went thoughtfully home. Some days after he was seen
+walking by himself with a pale face, a heavy eye, and slow step—all
+tokens of a sorrowful heart. Soon after, he was missed altogether;
+nobody saw him. The door of his house was however open, and his two
+pretty boys were as lively as usual, on the green before the door. I
+happened to pass when they were there, and I asked them how their father
+and mother were. They said they were still in bed, and would not waken,
+and the innocent lambs took me by the hand, to make me waken their
+parents. I know not what was in it, but I trembled from head to foot,
+and I was led in by the babies, as if I had not the power to resist.
+Never shall I forget what I saw in that bed.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+I found a letter on the table; and I came away, locking the door behind
+me, and took the lovely prattling orphans home. I could but shake my
+head and weep, as I gave them to the care of Mrs. Balwhidder, and she was
+terrified but said nothing. I then read the letter. It was to send the
+bairns to a gentleman, their uncle, in London. Oh! it is a terrible
+tale; but the winding-sheet and the earth is over it. I sent for two of
+my elders. I related what I had seen. Two coffins were got, and the
+bodies laid in them; and the next day, with one of the fatherless bairns
+in each hand, I followed them to the grave, which was dug in that part of
+the kirkyard where unchristened babies are laid. We durst not take it
+upon us to do more; but few knew the reason, and some thought it was
+because the deceased were strangers, and had no regular lair.
+
+I dressed the two bonny orphans in the best mourning at my own cost, and
+kept them in the manse till we could get an answer from their uncle, to
+whom I sent their father’s letter. It stung him to the quick, and he
+came down all the way from London, and took the children away himself.
+Oh! he was a vexed man when the beautiful bairns, on being told he was
+their uncle, ran into his arms, and complained that their papa and mamma
+had slept so long, that they would never waken.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER L
+YEAR 1809
+
+
+AS I come towards the events of these latter days, I am surprised to find
+myself not at all so distinct in my recollection of them as in those of
+the first of my ministry; being apt to confound the things of one
+occasion with those of another, which Mrs. Balwhidder says is an
+admonishment to me to leave off my writing. But, please God, I will
+endeavour to fulfil this as I have through life tried, to the best of my
+capacity, to do every other duty; and, with the help of Mrs. Balwhidder,
+who has a very clear understanding, I think I may get through my task in
+a creditable manner, which is all I aspire after; not writing for a vain
+world, but only to testify to posterity anent the great changes that have
+happened in my day and generation—a period which all the best-informed
+writers say, has not had its match in the history of the world since the
+beginning of time.
+
+By the failure of the cotton-mill company, whose affairs were not settled
+till the spring of this year, there was great suffering during the
+winter; but my people, those that still adhered to the establishment,
+bore their share of the dispensation with meekness and patience, nor was
+there wanting edifying monuments of resignation even among the
+stravaigers.
+
+On the day that the Canaille Meeting-house was opened, which was in the
+summer, I was smitten to the heart to see the empty seats that were in my
+kirk; for all the thoughtless, and some that I had a better opinion of,
+went to hear the opening discourse. Satan that day had power given to
+him to buffet me as he did Job of old; and when I looked around and saw
+the empty seats, my corruption rose, and I forgot myself in the
+remembering prayer; for when I prayed for all denominations of
+Christians, and worshippers, and infidels, I could not speak of the
+schismatics with patience, but entreated the Lord to do with the
+hobleshow at Cayenneville, as he saw meet in his displeasure, the which,
+when I came afterwards to think upon, I grieved at with a sore
+contrition.
+
+In the course of the week following, the elders, in a body, came to me in
+the manse, and after much commendation of my godly ministry, they said,
+that seeing I was now growing old, they thought they could not testify
+their respect for me in a better manner than by agreeing to get me a
+helper. But I would not at that time listen to such a proposal, for I
+felt no falling off in my powers of preaching; on the contrary, I found
+myself growing better at it, as I was enabled to hold forth, in an easy
+manner, often a whole half hour longer, than I could do a dozen years
+before. Therefore nothing was done in this year anent my resignation;
+but during the winter, Mrs. Balwhidder was often grieved, in the bad
+weather, that I should preach, and, in short, so worked upon my
+affections, that I began to think it was fitting for me to comply with
+the advice of my friends. Accordingly, in the course of the winter, the
+elders began to cast about for a helper; and during the bleak weather in
+the ensuing spring, several young men spared me from the necessity of
+preaching. But this relates to the concerns of the next and last year of
+my ministry. So I will now proceed to give an account of it, very
+thankful that I have been permitted, in unmolested tranquillity, to bring
+my history to such a point.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LI
+YEAR 1810
+
+
+MY tasks are all near a close; and in writing this final record of my
+ministry, the very sound of my pen admonishes me that my life is a burden
+on the back of flying Time, that he will soon be obliged to lay down in
+his great storehouse—the grave. Old age has, indeed, long warned me to
+prepare for rest; and the darkened windows of my sight show that the
+night is coming on, while deafness, like a door fast barred, has shut out
+all the pleasant sounds of this world, and inclosed me, as it were, in a
+prison, even from the voices of my friends.
+
+I have lived longer than the common lot of man, and I have seen, in my
+time, many mutations and turnings, and ups and downs, notwithstanding the
+great spread that has been in our national prosperity. I have beheld
+them that were flourishing like the green bay-trees, made desolate, and
+their branches scattered. But, in my own estate, I have had a large and
+liberal experience of goodness.
+
+At the beginning of my ministry I was reviled and rejected; but my honest
+endeavours to prove a faithful shepherd were blessed from on high, and
+rewarded with the affection of my flock. Perhaps, in the vanity of
+doting old age, I thought in this there was a merit due to myself, which
+made the Lord to send the chastisement of the Canaille schism among my
+people; for I was then wroth without judgment, and by my heat hastened
+into an open division the flaw that a more considerate manner might have
+healed. But I confess my fault, and submit my cheek to the smiter; and
+now I see that the finger of Wisdom was in that probation, and it was far
+better that the weavers meddled with the things of God, which they could
+not change, than with those of the King, which they could only harm. In
+that matter, however, I was like our gracious monarch in the American
+war; for though I thereby lost the pastoral allegiance of a portion of my
+people, in like manner as he did of his American subjects, yet, after the
+separation, I was enabled so to deport myself, that they showed me many
+voluntary testimonies of affectionate respect, and which it would be a
+vain glory in me to rehearse here. One thing I must record, because it
+is as much to their honour as it is to mine.
+
+When it was known that I was to preach my last sermon, every one of those
+who had been my hearers, and who had seceded to the Canaille meeting,
+made it a point that day to be in the parish kirk, and to stand in the
+crowd, that made a lane of reverence for me to pass from the kirk-door to
+the back-yett of the manse. And shortly after, a deputation of all their
+brethren, with their minister at their head, came to me one morning, and
+presented to me a server of silver, in token, as they were pleased to
+say, of their esteem for my blameless life, and the charity that I had
+practised towards the poor of all sects in the neighbourhood; which is
+set forth in a well-penned inscription, written by a weaver lad that
+works for his daily bread. Such a thing would have been a prodigy at the
+beginning of my ministry; but the progress of book-learning and education
+has been wonderful since, and with it has come a spirit of greater
+liberality than the world knew before, bringing men of adverse principles
+and doctrines into a more humane communion with each other; showing that
+it’s by the mollifying influence of knowledge the time will come to pass,
+when the tiger of papistry shall lie down with the lamb of reformation,
+and the vultures of prelacy be as harmless as the presbyterian doves;
+when the independent, the anabaptist, and every other order and
+denomination of Christians, not forgetting even those poor wee wrens of
+the Lord, the burghers and anti-burghers, who will pick from the hand of
+patronage, and dread no snare.
+
+On the next Sunday, after my farewell discourse, I took the arm of Mrs.
+Balwhidder, and with my cane in my hand, walked to our own pew, where I
+sat some time; but, owing to my deafness, not being able to hear, I have
+not since gone back to the church. But my people are fond of having
+their weans still christened by me, and the young folk, such as are of a
+serious turn, come to be married at my hands, believing, as they say,
+that there is something good in the blessing of an aged gospel minister.
+But even this remnant of my gown I must lay aside; for Mrs. Balwhidder is
+now and then obliged to stop me in my prayers, as I sometimes
+wander—pronouncing the baptismal blessing upon a bride and bridegroom,
+talking as if they were already parents. I am thankful, however, that I
+have been spared with a sound mind to write this book to the end; but it
+is my last task, and, indeed, really I have no more to say, saving only
+to wish a blessing on all people from on high, where I soon hope to be,
+and to meet there all the old and long-departed sheep of my flock,
+especially the first and second Mrs. Balwhidders.
+
+
+
+
+FOOTNOTES.
+
+
+{1} Dreghorn, Ayrshire, two miles from Irvine.
+
+{9} Irvine, Ayrshire.
+
+{17} Cognac.
+
+
+
+
+***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ANNALS OF THE PARISH***
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+<head>
+<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=US-ASCII" />
+<title>Annals of the Parish, by John Galt</title>
+ <style type="text/css">
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+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Annals of the Parish, by John Galt,
+Illustrated by Henry W. Kerr
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
+other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
+whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
+the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
+www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
+to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
+
+
+
+
+Title: Annals of the Parish
+
+
+Author: John Galt
+
+
+
+Release Date: May 13, 2015 [eBook #1310]
+[This file was first posted in April 18, 1998]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII)
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ANNALS OF THE PARISH***
+</pre>
+<p>Transcribed from the 1910 T. N. Foulis edition by David Price,
+email ccx074@pglaf.org</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/coverb.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"Book cover"
+title=
+"Book cover"
+ src="images/covers.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/fpb.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Loupin&rsquo;-on Stane"
+title=
+"The Loupin&rsquo;-on Stane"
+ src="images/fps.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<h1>ANNALS OF<br />
+THE PARISH</h1>
+<p style="text-align: center">OR THE CHRONICLE OF DAL-<br />
+MAILING DURING THE MINISTRY<br />
+OF THE REV. MICAH BALWHID-<br />
+DER.&nbsp; WRITTEN BY HIMSELF<br />
+AND ARRANGED AND EDITED BY<br />
+<b>JOHN GALT</b><br />
+ILLUSTRATED IN COLOUR BY<br />
+HENRY W. KERR, R.S.A.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/tpb.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"Decorative graphic"
+title=
+"Decorative graphic"
+ src="images/tps.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p style="text-align: center">T.N.FOULIS<br />
+London &amp; Edinburgh<br />
+1 9 1 0</p>
+
+<div class="gapspace">&nbsp;</div>
+<p style="text-align: center"><i>September</i> 1910</p>
+
+<div class="gapspace">&nbsp;</div>
+<p style="text-align: center"><i>Printed by Turnbull &amp;
+Spears</i>, <i>Edinburgh</i></p>
+<h2><a name="page1"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+1</span>INTRODUCTION</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">In</span> the same year, and on the same
+day of the same month, that his Sacred Majesty King George, the
+third of the name, came to his crown and kingdom, I was placed
+and settled as the minister of Dalmailing. <a
+name="citation1"></a><a href="#footnote1"
+class="citation">[1]</a>&nbsp; When about a week thereafter this
+was known in the parish, it was thought a wonderful thing, and
+everybody spoke of me and the new king as united in our trusts
+and temporalities, marvelling how the same should come to pass,
+and thinking the hand of Providence was in it, and that surely we
+were preordained to fade and flourish in fellowship together;
+which has really been the case: for in the same season that his
+Most Excellent Majesty, as he was very properly styled in the
+proclamations for the general fasts and thanksgivings, was set by
+as a precious vessel which had received a crack or a flaw, and
+could only be serviceable in the way of an ornament, I was
+obliged, by reason of age and the growing infirmities of my
+recollection, to consent to the earnest entreaties of the
+Session, and to accept of Mr. Amos to be my helper.&nbsp; I was
+long reluctant to do so; but the great respect that my people had
+for me, and the love that I bore towards them, over and above the
+sign that was given to me in the removal of the royal
+candle-stick from its place, worked upon my heart and
+understanding, and I could not stand out.&nbsp; So, on the last
+Sabbath of the year 1810, I preached my last sermon, and it was a
+moving discourse.&nbsp; There were few dry eyes in the kirk that
+day; for I had been with the aged from the beginning&mdash;the
+young considered me as their natural pastor&mdash;and my bidding
+them all farewell was, as when of old among the heathen, an idol
+was taken away by the hands of the enemy.</p>
+<p>At the close of the worship, and before the blessing, I
+addressed them in a fatherly manner; and, although the kirk was
+fuller than ever I saw it before, the fall of a pin might have
+been heard&mdash;at the conclusion there was a sobbing and much
+sorrow.&nbsp; I said,</p>
+<p>&ldquo;My dear friends, I have now finished my work among you
+for ever.&nbsp; I have often spoken to you from this place the
+words of truth and holiness; and, had it been in poor frail human
+nature to practise the advice and counselling that I have given
+in this pulpit to you, there would not need to be any cause for
+sorrow on this occasion&mdash;the close and latter end of my
+ministry.&nbsp; But, nevertheless, I have no reason to complain;
+and it will be my duty to testify, in that place where I hope we
+are all one day to meet again, that I found you a docile and a
+tractable flock, far more than at first I could have
+expected.&nbsp; There are among you still a few, but with grey
+heads and feeble hands now, that can remember the great
+opposition that was made to my placing, and the stout part they
+themselves took in the burly, because I was appointed by the
+patron; but they have lived to see the error of their way, and to
+know that preaching is the smallest portion of the duties of a
+faithful minister.&nbsp; I may not, my dear friends, have applied
+my talent in the pulpit so effectually as perhaps I might have
+done, considering the gifts that it pleased God to give me in
+that way, and the education that I had in the Orthodox University
+of Glasgow, as it was in the time of my youth; nor can I say
+that, in the works of peace-making and charity, I have done all
+that I should have done.&nbsp; But I have done my best, studying
+no interest but the good that was to rise according to the faith
+in Christ Jesus.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;To my young friends I would, as a parting word, say,
+look to the lives and conversation of your parents&mdash;they
+were plain, honest, and devout Christians, fearing God and
+honouring the King.&nbsp; They believed the Bible was the word of
+God; and, when they practised its precepts, they found, by the
+good that came from them, that it was truly so.&nbsp; They bore
+in mind the tribulation and persecution of their forefathers for
+righteousness&rsquo; sake, and were thankful for the quiet and
+protection of the government in their day and generation.&nbsp;
+Their land was tilled with industry, and they ate the bread of
+carefulness with a contented spirit, and, verily, they had the
+reward of well-doing even in this world; for they beheld on all
+sides the blessing of God upon the nation, and the tree growing,
+and the plough going where the banner of the oppressor was
+planted of old, and the war-horse trampled in the blood of
+martyrs.&nbsp; Reflect on this, my young friends, and know, that
+the best part of a Christian&rsquo;s duty in this world of much
+evil, is to thole and suffer with resignation, as lang as it is
+possible for human nature to do.&nbsp; I do not counsel passive
+obedience: that is a doctrine that the Church of Scotland can
+never abide; but the divine right of resistance, which, in the
+days of her trouble, she so bravely asserted against popish and
+prelatic usurpations, was never resorted to till the attempt was
+made to remove the ark of the tabernacle from her.&nbsp; I
+therefore counsel you, my young friends, not to lend your ears to
+those that trumpet forth their hypothetical politics; but to
+believe that the laws of the land are administered with a good
+intent, till in your own homes and dwellings ye feel the presence
+of the oppressor&mdash;then, and not till then, are ye free to
+gird your loins for battle&mdash;and woe to him, and woe to the
+land where that is come to, if the sword be sheathed till the
+wrong be redressed.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;As for you, my old companions, many changes have we
+seen in our day; but the change that we ourselves are soon to
+undergo will be the greatest of all.&nbsp; We have seen our
+bairns grow to manhood&mdash;we have seen the beauty of youth
+pass away&mdash;we have felt our backs become unable for the
+burthen, and our right hand forget its cunning.&mdash;Our eyes
+have become dim, and our heads grey&mdash;we are now tottering
+with short and feckless steps towards the grave; and some, that
+should have been here this day, are bed-rid, lying, as it were,
+at the gates of death, like Lazarus at the threshold of the rich
+man&rsquo;s door, full of ails and sores, and having no enjoyment
+but in the hope that is in hereafter.&nbsp; What can I say to you
+but farewell!&nbsp; Our work is done&mdash;we are weary and worn
+out, and in need of rest&mdash;may the rest of the blessed be our
+portion!&mdash;and in the sleep that all must sleep, beneath the
+cold blanket of the kirkyard grass, and on that clay pillow where
+we must shortly lay our heads, may we have pleasant dreams, till
+we are awakened to partake of the everlasting banquet of the
+saints in glory!&rdquo;</p>
+<p>When I had finished, there was for some time a great solemnity
+throughout the kirk; and, before giving the blessing, I sat down
+to compose myself, for my heart was big, and my spirit oppressed
+with sadness.</p>
+<p>As I left the pulpit, all the elders stood on the steps to
+hand me down, and the tear was in every eye, and they helped me
+into the session-house; but I could not speak to them, nor them
+to me.&nbsp; Then Mr. Dalziel, who was always a composed and
+sedate man, said a few words of prayer, and I was comforted
+therewith, and rose to go home to the manse; but in the
+churchyard all the congregation was assembled, young and old, and
+they made a lane for me to the back-yett that opened into the
+manse-garden&mdash;Some of them put out their hands and touched
+me as I passed, followed by the elders, and some of them
+wept.&nbsp; It was as if I was passing away, and to be no
+more&mdash;verily, it was the reward of my ministry&mdash;a
+faithful account of which, year by year, I now sit down, in the
+evening of my days, to make up, to the end that I may bear
+witness to the work of a beneficent Providence, even in the
+narrow sphere of my parish, and the concerns of that flock of
+which it was His most gracious pleasure to make me the unworthy
+shepherd.</p>
+<h2><a name="page7"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 7</span>CHAPTER
+I<br />
+YEAR 1760</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> Anno Domini one thousand seven
+hundred and sixty, was remarkable for three things in the parish
+of Dalmailing.&mdash;First and foremost, there was my placing;
+then the coming of Mrs. Malcolm with her five children to settle
+among us; and next, my marriage upon my own cousin, Miss Betty
+Lanshaw, by which the account of this year naturally divides
+itself into three heads or portions.</p>
+<p>First, of the placing.&mdash;It was a great affair; for I was
+put in by the patron, and the people knew nothing whatsoever of
+me, and their hearts were stirred into strife on the occasion,
+and they did all that lay within the compass of their power to
+keep me out, insomuch, that there was obliged to be a guard of
+soldiers to protect the presbytery; and it was a thing that made
+my heart grieve when I heard the drum beating and the fife
+playing as we were going to the kirk.&nbsp; The people were
+really mad and vicious, and flung dirt upon us as we passed, and
+reviled us all, and held out the finger of scorn at me; but I
+endured it with a resigned spirit, compassionating their
+wilfulness and blindness.&nbsp; Poor old Mr. Kilfuddy of the
+Braehill got such a clash of glar on the side of his face, that
+his eye was almost extinguished.</p>
+<p>When we got to the kirk door, it was found to be nailed up, so
+as by no possibility to be opened.&nbsp; The sergeant of the
+soldiers wanted to break it, but I was afraid that the heritors
+would grudge and complain of the expense of a new door, and I
+supplicated him to let it be as it was: we were, therefore,
+obligated to go in by a window, and the crowd followed us in the
+most unreverent manner, making the Lord&rsquo;s house like an inn
+on a fair day, with their grievous yellyhooing.&nbsp; During the
+time of the psalm and the sermon, they behaved themselves better,
+but when the induction came on, their clamour was dreadful; and
+Thomas Thorl, the weaver, a pious zealot in that time, he got up
+and protested, and said, &ldquo;Verily, verily, I say unto you,
+he that entereth not by the door into the sheepfold, but climbeth
+up some other way, the same is a thief and a robber.&rdquo;&nbsp;
+And I thought I would have a hard and sore time of it with such
+an outstrapolous people.&nbsp; Mr. Given, that was then the
+minister of Lugton, was a jocose man, and would have his joke
+even at a solemnity.&nbsp; When the laying of the hands upon me
+was adoing, he could not get near enough to put on his, but he
+stretched out his staff and touched my head, and said, to the
+great diversion of the rest, &ldquo;This will do well enough,
+timber to timber;&rdquo; but it was an unfriendly saying of Mr.
+Given, considering the time and the place, and the temper of my
+people.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p8b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Souter"
+title=
+"The Souter"
+ src="images/p8s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>After the ceremony, we then got out at the window, and it was
+a heavy day to me; but we went to the manse, and there we had an
+excellent dinner, which Mrs. Watts of the new inns of Irville <a
+name="citation9"></a><a href="#footnote9"
+class="citation">[9]</a> prepared at my request, and sent her
+chaise-driver to serve, for he was likewise her waiter, she
+having then but one chaise, and that no often called for.</p>
+<p>But, although my people received me in this unruly manner, I
+was resolved to cultivate civility among them, and therefore, the
+very next morning I began a round of visitations; but, oh! it was
+a steep brae that I had to climb, and it needed a stout
+heart.&nbsp; For I found the doors in some places barred against
+me; in others, the bairns, when they saw me coming, ran crying to
+their mothers, &ldquo;Here&rsquo;s the feckless Mess-John!&rdquo;
+and then, when I went into the houses, their parents wouldna ask
+me to sit down, but with a scornful way, said, &ldquo;Honest man,
+what&rsquo;s your pleasure here?&rdquo;&nbsp; Nevertheless, I
+walked about from door to door like a dejected beggar, till I got
+the almous deed of a civil reception&mdash;and who would have
+thought it?&mdash;from no less a person than the same Thomas
+Thorl that was so bitter against me in the kirk on the foregoing
+day.</p>
+<p>Thomas was standing at the door with his green duffle apron,
+and his red Kilmarnock nightcap&mdash;I mind him as well as if it
+was but yesterday&mdash;and he had seen me going from house to
+house, and in what manner I was rejected, and his bowels were
+moved, and he said to me in a kind manner, &ldquo;Come in, sir,
+and ease yoursel&rsquo;: this will never do, the clergy are
+God&rsquo;s gorbies, and for their Master&rsquo;s sake it behoves
+us to respect them.&nbsp; There was no ane in the whole parish
+mair against you than mysel&rsquo;; but this early visitation is
+a symptom of grace that I couldna have expectit from a bird out
+the nest of patronage.&rdquo;&nbsp; I thanked Thomas, and went in
+with him, and we had some solid conversation together, and I told
+him that it was not so much the pastor&rsquo;s duty to feed the
+flock, as to herd them well; and that, although there might be
+some abler with the head than me, there wasna a he within the
+bounds of Scotland more willing to watch the fold by night and by
+day.&nbsp; And Thomas said he had not heard a mair sound observe
+for some time, and that, if I held to that doctrine in the
+poopit, it wouldna be lang till I would work a
+change.&mdash;&ldquo;I was mindit,&rdquo; quoth he, &ldquo;never
+to set my foot within the kirk door while you were there; but to
+testify, and no to condemn without a trial, I&rsquo;ll be there
+next Lord&rsquo;s day, and egg my neighbours to be likewise, so
+ye&rsquo;ll no have to preach just to the bare walls and the
+laird&rsquo;s family.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>I have now to speak of the coming of Mrs. Malcolm.&mdash;She
+was the widow of a Clyde shipmaster, that was lost at sea with
+his vessel.&nbsp; She was a genty body, calm and
+methodical.&nbsp; From morning to night she sat at her wheel,
+spinning the finest lint, which suited well with her pale
+hands.&nbsp; She never changed her widow&rsquo;s weeds, and she
+was aye as if she had just been ta&rsquo;en out of a
+bandbox.&nbsp; The tear was aften in her e&rsquo;e when the
+bairns were at the school; but when they came home, her spirit
+was lighted up with gladness, although, poor woman, she had many
+a time very little to give them.&nbsp; They were, however,
+wonderful well-bred things, and took with thankfulness whatever
+she set before them; for they knew that their father, the
+breadwinner, was away, and that she had to work sore for their
+bit and drap.&nbsp; I dare say, the only vexation that ever she
+had from any of them, on their own account, was when Charlie, the
+eldest laddie, had won fourpence at pitch-and-toss at the school,
+which he brought home with a proud heart to his mother.&nbsp; I
+happened to be daunrin&rsquo; by at the time, and just looked in
+at the door to say gude-night: it was a sad sight.&nbsp; There
+was she sitting with the silent tear on her cheek, and Charlie
+greeting as if he had done a great fault, and the other four
+looking on with sorrowful faces.&nbsp; Never, I am sure, did
+Charlie Malcolm gamble after that night.</p>
+<p>I often wondered what brought Mrs. Malcolm to our clachan,
+instead of going to a populous town, where she might have taken
+up a huxtry-shop, as she was but of a silly constitution, the
+which would have been better for her than spinning from morning
+to far in the night, as if she was in verity drawing the thread
+of life.&nbsp; But it was, no doubt, from an honest pride to hide
+her poverty; for when her daughter Effie was ill with the
+measles&mdash;the poor lassie was very ill&mdash;nobody thought
+she could come through, and when she did get the turn, she was
+for many a day a heavy handful;&mdash;our session being rich, and
+nobody on it but cripple Tammy Daidles, that was at that time
+known through all the country side for begging on a horse, I
+thought it my duty to call upon Mrs. Malcolm in a sympathising
+way, and offer her some assistance, but she refused it.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;No, sir,&rdquo; said she, &ldquo;I canna take help from
+the poor&rsquo;s-box, although it&rsquo;s very true that I am in
+great need; for it might hereafter be cast up to my bairns, whom
+it may please God to restore to better circumstances when I am no
+to see&rsquo;t; but I would fain borrow five pounds, and if, sir,
+you will write to Mr. Maitland, that is now the Lord Provost of
+Glasgow, and tell him that Marion Shaw would be obliged to him
+for the lend of that soom, I think he will not fail to send
+it.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>I wrote the letter that night to Provost Maitland, and, by the
+retour of the post, I got an answer, with twenty pounds for Mrs.
+Malcolm, saying, &ldquo;That it was with sorrow he heard so small
+a trifle could be serviceable.&rdquo;&nbsp; When I took the
+letter and the money, which was in a bank-bill, she said,
+&ldquo;This is just like himsel&rsquo;.&rdquo;&nbsp; She then
+told me that Mr. Maitland had been a gentleman&rsquo;s son of the
+east country, but driven out of his father&rsquo;s house, when a
+laddie, by his stepmother; and that he had served as a servant
+lad with her father, who was the Laird of Yillcogie, but ran
+through his estate, and left her, his only daughter, in little
+better than beggary with her auntie, the mother of Captain
+Malcolm, her husband that was.&nbsp; Provost Maitland in his
+servitude had ta&rsquo;en a notion of her; and when he recovered
+his patrimony, and had become a great Glasgow merchant, on
+hearing how she was left by her father, he offered to marry her,
+but she had promised herself to her cousin the captain, whose
+widow she was.&nbsp; He then married a rich lady, and in time
+grew, as he was, Lord Provost of the city; but his letter with
+the twenty pounds to me, showed that he had not forgotten his
+first love.&nbsp; It was a short, but a well-written letter, in a
+fair hand of write, containing much of the true gentleman; and
+Mrs. Malcolm said, &ldquo;Who knows but out of the regard he once
+had for their mother, he may do something for my five helpless
+orphans.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Thirdly, Upon the subject of taking my cousin, Miss Betty
+Lanshaw, for my first wife, I have little to say.&mdash;It was
+more out of a compassionate habitual affection, than the passion
+of love.&nbsp; We were brought up by our grandmother in the same
+house, and it was a thing spoken of from the beginning, that
+Betty and me were to be married.&nbsp; So, when she heard that
+the Laird of Breadland had given me the presentation of
+Dalmailing, she began to prepare for the wedding; and as soon as
+the placing was well over, and the manse in order, I gaed to Ayr,
+where she was, and we were quietly married, and came home in a
+chaise, bringing with us her little brother Andrew, that died in
+the East Indies, and he lived and was brought up by us.</p>
+<p>Now, this is all, I think, that
+happened in that year worthy of being mentioned, except that at
+the sacrament, when old Mr. Kilfuddy was preaching in the tent,
+it came on such a thunder-plump, that there was not a single soul
+stayed in the kirkyard to hear him; for the which he was greatly
+mortified, and never after came to our preachings.</p>
+<h2><a name="page15"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+15</span>CHAPTER II<br />
+YEAR 1761</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> was in this year that the great
+smuggling trade corrupted all the west coast, especially the
+laigh lands about the Troon and the Loans.&nbsp; The tea was
+going like the chaff, the brandy like well-water, and the wastrie
+of all things was terrible.&nbsp; There was nothing minded but
+the riding of cadgers by day, and excisemen by night&mdash;and
+battles between the smugglers and the king&rsquo;s men, both by
+sea and land.&nbsp; There was a continual drunkenness and
+debauchery; and our session, that was but on the lip of this
+whirlpool of iniquity, had an awful time o&rsquo;t.&nbsp; I did
+all that was in the power of nature to keep my people from the
+contagion: I preached sixteen times from the text, &ldquo;Render
+to C&aelig;sar the things that are
+C&aelig;sar&rsquo;s.&rdquo;&nbsp; I visited, and I exhorted; I
+warned, and I prophesied; I told them that, although the money
+came in like sclate stones, it would go like the snow off the
+dyke.&nbsp; But for all I could do, the evil got in among us, and
+we had no less than three contested bastard bairns upon our hands
+at one time, which was a thing never heard of in a parish of the
+shire of Ayr since the Reformation.&nbsp; Two of the bairns,
+after no small sifting and searching, we got fathered at last;
+but the third, that was by Meg Glaiks, and given to one Rab
+Rickerton, was utterly refused, though the fact was not denied;
+but he was a termagant fellow, and snappit his fingers at the
+elders.&nbsp; The next day he listed in the Scotch Greys, who
+were then quartered at Ayr, and we never heard more of him, but
+thought he had been slain in battle, till one of the parish,
+about three years since, went up to London to lift a legacy from
+a cousin that died among the Hindoos.&nbsp; When he was walking
+about, seeing the curiosities, and among others Chelsea Hospital,
+he happened to speak to some of the invalids, who found out from
+his tongue that he was a Scotchman; and speaking to the invalids,
+one of them, a very old man, with a grey head and a leg of
+timber, inquired what part of Scotland he was come from; and when
+he mentioned my parish, the invalid gave a great shout, and said
+he was from the same place himself; and who should this old man
+be, but the very identical Rab Rickerton, that was art and part
+in Meg Glaiks&rsquo; disowned bairn.&nbsp; Then they had a long
+converse together, and he had come through many hardships, but
+had turned out a good soldier; and so, in his old days, was an
+indoor pensioner, and very comfortable; and he said that he had,
+to be sure, spent his youth in the devil&rsquo;s service, and his
+manhood in the king&rsquo;s, but his old age was given to that of
+his Maker, which I was blithe and thankful to hear; and he
+enquired about many a one in the parish, the blooming and the
+green of his time, but they were all dead and buried; and he had
+a contrite and penitent spirit, and read his Bible every day,
+delighting most in the Book of Joshua, the Chronicles, and the
+Kings.</p>
+<p>Before this year, the drinking of tea was little known in the
+parish, saving among a few of the heritors&rsquo; houses on a
+Sabbath evening; but now it became very rife: yet the commoner
+sort did not like to let it be known that they were taking to the
+new luxury, especially the elderly women, who, for that reason,
+had their ploys in out-houses and by-places, just as the witches
+lang syne had their sinful possets and galravitchings; and they
+made their tea for common in the pint-stoup, and drank it out of
+caps and luggies, for there were but few among them that had cups
+and saucers.&nbsp; Well do I remember one night in harvest, in
+this very year, as I was taking my twilight dauner aneath the
+hedge along the back side of Thomas Thorl&rsquo;s yard,
+meditating on the goodness of Providence, and looking at the
+sheaves of victual on the field, that I heard his wife, and two
+three other carlins, with their Bohea in the inside of the hedge,
+and no doubt but it had a lacing of the conek, <a
+name="citation17"></a><a href="#footnote17"
+class="citation">[17]</a> for they were all cracking like
+pen-guns.&nbsp; But I gave them a sign, by a loud host, that
+Providence sees all, and it skailed the bike; for I heard them,
+like guilty creatures, whispering, and gathering up their
+truck-pots and trenchers, and cowering away home.</p>
+<p>It was in this year that Patrick Dilworth (he had been
+schoolmaster of the parish from the time, as his wife said, of
+Anna Regina, and before the Rexes came to the crown), was
+disabled by a paralytic, and the heritors, grudging the cost of
+another schoolmaster as long as he lived, would not allow the
+session to get his place supplied, which was a wrong thing, I
+must say, of them; for the children of the parishioners were
+obliged, therefore, to go to the neighbouring towns for their
+schooling, and the custom was to take a piece of bread and cheese
+in their pockets for dinner, and to return in the evening always
+voracious for more, the long walk helping the natural crave of
+their young appetites.&nbsp; In this way Mrs. Malcolm&rsquo;s two
+eldest laddies, Charlie and Robert, were wont to go to Irville,
+and it was soon seen that they kept themselves aloof from the
+other callans in the clachan, and had a genteeler turn than the
+grulshy bairns of the cottars.&nbsp; Her bit lassies, Kate and
+Effie, were better off; for some years before, Nanse Banks had
+taken up a teaching in a garret-room of a house, at the corner
+where John Bayne has biggit the sclate-house for his
+grocery-shop.&nbsp; Nanse learnt them reading and working
+stockings, and how to sew the semplar, for twal-pennies
+a-week.&nbsp; She was a patient creature, well cut out for her
+calling, with blear een, a pale face, and a long neck, but meek
+and contented withal, tholing the dule of this world with a
+Christian submission of the spirit; and her garret-room was a
+cordial of cleanliness, for she made the scholars set the house
+in order, time and time about, every morning; and it was a common
+remark for many a day, that the lassies, who had been at Nanse
+Banks&rsquo;s school, were always well spoken of, both for their
+civility, and the trigness of their houses when they were
+afterwards married.&nbsp; In short, I do not know, that in all
+the long epoch of my ministry, any individual body did more to
+improve the ways of the parishioners, in their domestic concerns,
+than did that worthy and innocent creature, Nanse Banks, the
+schoolmistress; and she was a great loss when she was removed, as
+it is to be hoped, to a better world; but anent this I shall have
+to speak more at large hereafter.</p>
+<p>It was in this year that my patron, the Laird of Breadland,
+departed this life, and I preached his funeral sermon; but he was
+non-beloved in the parish; for my people never forgave him for
+putting me upon them, although they began to be more on a
+familiar footing with myself.&nbsp; This was partly owing to my
+first wife, Betty Lanshaw, who was an active throughgoing woman,
+and wonderfu&rsquo; useful to many of the cottars&rsquo; wives at
+their lying-in; and when a death happened among them, her helping
+hand, and any thing we had at the manse, was never wanting; and I
+went about myself to the bedsides of the frail, leaving no stone
+unturned to win the affections of my people, which, by the
+blessing of the Lord, in process of time, was brought to a
+bearing.</p>
+<p>But a thing happened in this year, which deserves to be
+recorded, as manifesting what effect the smuggling was beginning
+to take in the morals of the country side.&nbsp; One Mr.
+Macskipnish, of Highland parentage, who had been a
+valet-de-chambre with a major in the campaigns, and taken a
+prisoner with him by the French, he having come home in a cartel,
+took up a dancing-school at Irville, the which art he had learnt
+in the genteelest fashion, in the mode of Paris, at the French
+court.&nbsp; Such a thing as a dancing-school had never, in the
+memory of man, been known in our country side; and there was such
+a sound about the steps and cottillions of Mr. Macskipnish, that
+every lad and lass, that could spare time and siller, went to
+him, to the great neglect of their work.&nbsp; The very bairns on
+the loan, instead of their wonted play, gaed linking and louping
+in the steps of Mr. Macskipnish, who was, to be sure, a great
+curiosity, with long spindle legs, his breast shot out like a
+duck&rsquo;s, and his head powdered and frizzled up like a
+tappit-hen.&nbsp; He was, indeed, the proudest peacock that could
+be seen, and he had a ring on his finger, and when he came to
+drink his tea at the Breadland, he brought no hat on his head,
+but a droll cockit thing under his arm, which, he said, was after
+the manner of the courtiers at the petty suppers of one Madam
+Pompadour, who was at that time the concubine of the French
+king.</p>
+<p>I do not recollect any other remarkable thing that happened in
+this year.&nbsp; The harvest was very abundant, and the meal so
+cheap, that it caused a great defect in my stipend; so that I was
+obligated to postpone the purchase of a mahogany scrutoire for my
+study, as I had intended.&nbsp; But I had not the heart to
+complain of this: on the contrary, I rejoiced thereat; for what
+made me want my scrutoire till another year, had carried
+blitheness into the hearth of the cottar, and made the
+widow&rsquo;s heart sing with joy; and I would have been an
+unnatural creature, had I not joined in the universal gladness,
+because plenty did abound.</p>
+<h2><a name="page22"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+22</span>CHAPTER III<br />
+YEAR 1762</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> third year of my ministry was
+long held in remembrance for several very memorable things.&nbsp;
+William Byres of the Loanhead had a cow that calved two calves at
+one calving; Mrs. Byres, the same year, had twins, male and
+female; and there was such a crop on his fields, testifying that
+the Lord never sends a mouth into the world without providing
+meat for it.&nbsp; But what was thought a very daunting sign of
+something, happened on the Sacrament Sabbath at the conclusion of
+the action sermon, when I had made a very suitable
+discourse.&nbsp; The day was tempestuous, and the wind blew with
+such a pith and birr, that I thought it would have twirled the
+trees in the kirkyard out by the roots, and, blowing in this
+manner, it tirled the thack from the rigging of the manse stable;
+and the same blast that did that, took down the lead that was on
+the kirk-roof, which hurled off, as I was saying, at the
+conclusion of the action sermon, with such a dreadful sound, as
+the like was never heard, and all the congregation thought that
+it betokened a mutation to me.&nbsp; However, nothing particular
+happened to me; but the smallpox came in among the weans of the
+parish, and the smashing that it made of the poor bits o&rsquo;
+bairns was indeed woeful.</p>
+<p>One Sabbath, when the pestilence was raging, I preached a
+sermon about Rachel weeping for her children, which Thomas Thorl,
+who was surely a great judge of good preaching, said, &ldquo;was
+a monument of divinity whilk searched the heart of many a parent
+that day;&rdquo; a thing I was well pleased to hear, for Thomas,
+as I have related at length, was the most zealous champion
+against my getting the parish; but, from this time, I set him
+down in my mind for the next vacancy among the elders.&nbsp;
+Worthy man! it was not permitted him to arrive at that
+honour.&nbsp; In the fall of that year he took an income in his
+legs, and couldna go about, and was laid up for the remainder of
+his days, a perfect Lazarus, by the fire-side.&nbsp; But he was
+well supported in his affliction.&nbsp; In due season, when it
+pleased Him that alone can give and take, to pluck him from this
+life, as the fruit ripened and ready for the gathering, his
+death, to all that knew him, was a gentle dispensation, for truly
+he had been in sore trouble.</p>
+<p>It was in this year that Charlie Malcolm, Mrs. Malcolm&rsquo;s
+eldest son, was sent to be a cabin-boy in the Tobacco trader, a
+three-masted ship, that sailed between Port-Glasgow and Virginia
+in America.&nbsp; She was commanded by Captain Dickie, an Irville
+man; for at that time the Clyde was supplied with the best
+sailors from our coast, the coal-trade with Ireland being a
+better trade for bringing up good mariners than the long voyages
+in the open sea; which was the reason, as I often heard said, why
+the Clyde shipping got so many of their men from our country
+side.&nbsp; The going to sea of Charlie Malcolm was, on divers
+accounts, a very remarkable thing to us all; for he was the first
+that ever went from our parish, in the memory of man, to be a
+sailor, and everybody was concerned at it, and some thought it
+was a great venture of his mother to let him, his father having
+been lost at sea.&nbsp; But what could the forlorn widow
+do?&nbsp; She had five weans, and little to give them; and, as
+she herself said, he was aye in the hand of his Maker, go where
+he might; and the will of God would be done, in spite of all
+earthly wiles and devices to the contrary.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p24b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"Preparing for the Kirk"
+title=
+"Preparing for the Kirk"
+ src="images/p24s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>On the Monday morning, when Charlie was to go away to meet the
+Irville carrier on the road, we were all up, and I walked by
+myself from the manse into the clachan to bid him farewell, and I
+met him just coming from his mother&rsquo;s door, as blithe as a
+bee, in his sailor&rsquo;s dress, with a stick, and a bundle tied
+in a Barcelona silk handkerchief hanging o&rsquo;er his shoulder,
+and his two little brothers were with him, and his sisters, Kate
+and Effie, looking out from the door all begreeten; but his
+mother was in the house, praying to the Lord to protect her
+orphan, as she afterwards told me.&nbsp; All the weans of the
+clachan were gathered at the kirkyard yett to see him pass, and
+they gave him three great shouts as he was going by; and
+everybody was at their doors, and said something encouraging to
+him; but there was a great laugh when auld Mizy Spaewell came
+hirpling with her bauchle in her hand, and flung it after him for
+good-luck.&nbsp; Mizy had a wonderful faith in freats, and was
+just an oracle of sagacity at expounding dreams, and bodes of
+every sort and description&mdash;besides, she was reckoned one of
+the best howdies in her day; but by this time she was grown frail
+and feckless, and she died the same year on Hallowe&rsquo;en,
+which made everybody wonder that it should have so fallen out for
+her to die on Hallowe&rsquo;en.</p>
+<p>Shortly after the departure of Charlie Malcolm, the Lady of
+Breadland, with her three daughters, removed to Edinburgh, where
+the young laird, that had been my pupil, was learning to be an
+advocate, and the Breadland-house was set to Major Gilchrist, a
+nabob from India; but he was a narrow ailing man, and his
+maiden-sister, Miss Girzie, was the scrimpetest creature that
+could be; so that, in their hands, all the pretty policy of the
+Breadlands, that had cost a power of money to the old laird that
+was my patron, fell into decay and disorder; and the bonny
+yew-trees that were cut into the shape of peacocks, soon grew out
+of all shape, and are now doleful monuments of the major&rsquo;s
+tack, and that of Lady Skimmilk, as Miss Girzie Gilchrist, his
+sister, was nick-named by every ane that kent her.</p>
+<p>But it was not so much on account of the neglect of the
+Breadland, that the incoming of Major Gilchrist was to be
+deplored.&nbsp; The old men that had a light labour in keeping
+the policy in order, were thrown out of bread, and could do
+little; and the poor women that whiles got a bit and a drap from
+the kitchen of the family, soon felt the change, so that by
+little and little we were obligated to give help from the
+session; insomuch that, before the end of the year, I was
+necessitated to preach a discourse on almsgiving, specially for
+the benefit of our own poor, a thing never before known in the
+parish.</p>
+<p>But one good thing came from the Gilchrists to Mrs.
+Malcolm.&nbsp; Miss Girzie, whom they called Lady Skimmilk, had
+been in a very penurious way as a seamstress, in the Gorbals of
+Glasgow, while her brother was making the fortune in India, and
+she was a clever needle-woman&mdash;none better, as it was said;
+and she, having some things to make, took Kate Malcolm to help
+her in the coarse work; and Kate, being a nimble and birky thing,
+was so useful to the lady, and the complaining man the major,
+that they invited her to stay with them at the Breadland for the
+winter, where, although she was holden to her seam from morning
+to night, her food lightened the hand of her mother, who, for the
+first time since her coming into the parish, found the penny for
+the day&rsquo;s darg more than was needed for the meal-basin; and
+the tea-drinking was beginning to spread more openly, insomuch
+that, by the advice of the first Mrs. Balwhidder, Mrs. Malcolm
+took in tea to sell, and in this way was enabled to eke something
+to the small profits of her wheel.&nbsp; Thus the tide that had
+been so long ebbing to her, began to turn; and here I am bound in
+truth to say, that although I never could abide the smuggling,
+both on its own account, and the evils that grew therefrom to the
+country side, I lost some of my dislike to the tea after Mrs.
+Malcolm began to traffic in it, and we then had it for our
+breakfast in the morning at the manse, as well as in the
+afternoon.&nbsp; But what I thought most of it for was, that it
+did no harm to the head of the drinkers, which was not always the
+case with the possets that were in fashion before.&nbsp; There is
+no meeting now in the summer evenings, as I remember often
+happened in my younger days, with decent ladies coming home with
+red faces, tosy and cosh, from a posset-masking; so, both for its
+temperance and on account of Mrs. Malcolm&rsquo;s sale, I
+refrained from the November in this year to preach against tea;
+but I never lifted the weight of my displeasure from off the
+smuggling trade, until it was utterly put down by the strong hand
+of government.</p>
+<p>There was no other thing of note in this year, saving only
+that I planted in the garden the big pear-tree, which had the two
+great branches that we call the Adam and Eve.&nbsp; I got the
+plant, then a sapling, from Mr. Graft, that was Lord
+Eaglesham&rsquo;s head-gardener; and he said it was, as indeed
+all the parish now knows well, a most juicy sweet pear, such as
+was not known in Scotland till my lord brought down the father
+plant from the king&rsquo;s garden in London, in the forty-five
+when he went up to testify his loyalty to the House of
+Hanover.</p>
+<h2><a name="page29"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+29</span>CHAPTER IV<br />
+YEAR 1763</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> An. Dom. 1763, was, in many a
+respect, a memorable year, both in public and in private.&nbsp;
+The King granted peace to the French, and Charlie Malcolm, that
+went to sea in the Tobacco trader, came home to see his
+mother.&nbsp; The ship, after being at America, had gone down to
+Jamaica, an island in the West Indies, with a cargo of live
+lumber, as Charlie told me himself, and had come home with more
+than a hundred and fifty hoggits of sugar, and sixty-three
+puncheons full of rum; for she was, by all accounts, a stately
+galley, and almost two hundred tons in the burthen, being the
+largest vessel then sailing from the creditable town of
+Port-Glasgow.&nbsp; Charlie was not expected; and his coming was
+a great thing to us all, so I will mention the whole
+particulars.</p>
+<p>One evening, towards the gloaming, as I was taking my walk of
+meditation, I saw a brisk sailor laddie coming towards me.&nbsp;
+He had a pretty green parrot sitting on a bundle, tied in a
+Barcelona silk handkerchief, which he carried with a stick over
+his shoulder, and in this bundle was a wonderful big nut, such as
+no one in our parish had ever seen.&nbsp; It was called a
+cocker-nut.&nbsp; This blithe callant was Charlie Malcolm, who
+had come all the way that day his leeful lane, on his own legs
+from Greenock, where the Tobacco trader was then &rsquo;livering
+her cargo.&nbsp; I told him how his mother, and his brothers, and
+his sisters were all in good health, and went to convoy him home;
+and as we were going along, he told me many curious things, and
+he gave me six beautiful yellow limes, that he had brought in his
+pouch all the way across the seas, for me to make a bowl of punch
+with, and I thought more of them than if they had been golden
+guineas, it was so mindful of the laddie.</p>
+<p>When we got to the door of his mother&rsquo;s house, she was
+sitting at the fireside, with her three other bairns at their
+bread and milk, Kate being then with Lady Skimmilk, at the
+Breadland, sewing.&nbsp; It was between the day and dark, when
+the shuttle stands still till the lamp is lighted.&nbsp; But such
+a shout of joy and thankfulness as rose from that hearth, when
+Charlie went in!&nbsp; The very parrot, ye would have thought,
+was a participator, for the beast gied a skraik that made my
+whole head dirl; and the neighbours came flying and flocking to
+see what was the matter, for it was the first parrot ever seen
+within the bounds of the parish, and some thought it was but a
+foreign hawk, with a yellow head and green feathers.</p>
+<p>In the midst of all this, Effie Malcolm had run off to the
+Breadland for her sister Kate, and the two lassies came flying
+breathless, with Miss Girzie Gilchrist, the Lady Skimmilk,
+pursuing them like desperation, or a griffin, down the avenue;
+for Kate, in her hurry, had flung down her seam, a new printed
+gown, that she was helping to make, and it had fallen into a
+boyne of milk that was ready for the creaming, by which issued a
+double misfortune to Miss Girzie, the gown being not only ruined,
+but licking up the cream.&nbsp; For this, poor Kate was not
+allowed ever to set her face in the Breadland again.</p>
+<p>When Charlie Malcolm had stayed about a week with his mother,
+he returned to his berth in the Tobacco trader, and shortly after
+his brother Robert was likewise sent to serve his time to the
+sea, with an owner that was master of his own bark, in the coal
+trade at Irville.&nbsp; Kate, who was really a surprising lassie
+for her years, was taken off her mother&rsquo;s hands by the old
+Lady Macadam, that lived in her jointure house, which is now the
+Cross Keys Inn.&nbsp; Her ladyship was a woman of high breeding,
+her husband having been a great general, and knighted by the king
+for his exploits; but she was lame, and could not move about in
+her dining-room without help; so hearing from the first Mrs.
+Balwhidder how Kate had done such an unatonable deed to Miss
+Girzie Gilchrist, she sent for Kate, and, finding her sharp and
+apt, she took her to live with her as a companion.&nbsp; This was
+a vast advantage, for the lady was versed in all manner of
+accomplishments, and could read and speak French with more ease
+than any professor at that time in the College of Glasgow; and
+she had learnt to sew flowers on satin, either in a nunnery
+abroad, or in a boarding-school in England, and took pleasure in
+teaching Kate all she knew, and how to behave herself like a
+lady.</p>
+<p>In the summer of this year, old Mr. Patrick Dilworth, that had
+so long been doited with the paralytics, died, and it was a great
+relief to my people, for the heritors could no longer refuse to
+get a proper schoolmaster; so we took on trial Mr. Lorimore, who
+has ever since the year after, with so much credit to himself,
+and usefulness to the parish, been schoolmaster, session clerk,
+and precentor&mdash;a man of great mildness and extraordinary
+particularity.&nbsp; He was then a very young man, and some
+objection was made, on account of his youth, to his being
+session-clerk, especially as the smuggling immorality still gave
+us much trouble in the making up of irregular marriages; but his
+discretion was greater than could have been hoped for from his
+years; and, after a twelvemonth&rsquo;s probation in the capacity
+of schoolmaster, he was installed in all the offices that had
+belonged to his predecessor, old Mr. Patrick Dilworth that
+was.</p>
+<p>But the most memorable thing that befell among my people this
+year, was the burning of the lint-mill on the Lugton water, which
+happened, of all the days of the year, on the very selfsame day
+that Miss Girzie Gilchrist, better known as Lady Skimmilk, hired
+the chaise from Mrs. Watts of the New Inns of Irville, to go with
+her brother, the major, to consult the faculty in Edinburgh
+concerning his complaints.&nbsp; For, as the chaise was coming by
+the mill, William Huckle, the miller that was, came flying out of
+the mill like a demented man, crying fire!&mdash;and it was the
+driver that brought the melancholy tidings to the
+clachan&mdash;and melancholy they were; for the mill was utterly
+destroyed, and in it not a little of all that year&rsquo;s crop
+of lint in our parish.&nbsp; The first Mrs. Balwhidder lost
+upwards of twelve stone, which we had raised on the glebe with no
+small pains, watering it in the drouth, as it was intended for
+sarking to ourselves, and sheets and napery.&nbsp; A great loss
+indeed it was, and the vexation thereof had a visible effect on
+Mrs. Balwhidder&rsquo;s health, which from the spring had been in
+a dwining way.&nbsp; But for it, I think she might have wrestled
+through the winter: however, it was ordered otherwise, and she
+was removed from mine to Abraham&rsquo;s bosom on Christmas-day,
+and buried on Hogmanay, for it was thought uncanny to have a dead
+corpse in the house on the new-year&rsquo;s day.&nbsp; She was a
+worthy woman, studying with all her capacity to win the hearts of
+my people towards me&mdash;in the which good work she prospered
+greatly; so that, when she died, there was not a single soul in
+the parish that was not contented with both my walk and
+conversation.&nbsp; Nothing could be more peaceable than the way
+we lived together.&nbsp; Her brother Andrew, a fine lad, I had
+sent to the college at Glasgow, at my own cost; and when he came
+out to the burial, he stayed with me a month, for the manse after
+her decease was very dull, and it was during this visit that he
+gave me an inkling of his wish to go out to India as a cadet, but
+the transactions anent that fall within the scope of another
+year&mdash;as well as what relates to her headstone, and the
+epitaph in metre, which I indicated myself thereon; John Truel
+the mason carving the same, as may be seen in the kirkyard, where
+it wants a little reparation and setting upright, having settled
+the wrong way when the second Mrs. Balwhidder was laid by her
+side.&mdash;But I must not here enter upon an anticipation.</p>
+<h2><a name="page35"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+35</span>CHAPTER V<br />
+YEAR 1764</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> year well deserved the name of
+the monumental year in our parish; for the young laird of the
+Breadland, that had been my pupil, being learning to be an
+advocate among the faculty in Edinburgh, with his lady mother,
+who had removed thither with the young ladies her daughters, for
+the benefit of education, sent out to be put up in the kirk,
+under the loft over the family vault, an elegant marble
+headstone, with an epitaph engraven thereon, in fair Latin,
+setting forth many excellent qualities which the old laird, my
+patron that was, the inditer thereof said he possessed.&nbsp; I
+say the inditer, because it couldna have been the young laird
+himself, although he got the credit o&rsquo;t on the stone, for
+he was nae daub in my aught at the Latin or any other
+language.&nbsp; However, he might improve himself at Edinburgh,
+where a&rsquo; manner of genteel things were then to be got at an
+easy rate, and doubtless the young laird got a probationer at the
+College to write the epitaph; but I have often wondered
+sin&rsquo; syne, how he came to make it in Latin, for assuredly
+his dead parent, if he could have seen it, could not have read a
+single word o&rsquo;t, notwithstanding it was so vaunty about his
+virtues, and other civil and hospitable qualifications.</p>
+<p>The coming of the laird&rsquo;s monumental stone had a great
+effect on me, then in a state of deep despondency for the loss of
+the first Mrs. Balwhidder; and I thought I could not do a better
+thing, just by way of diversion in my heavy sorrow, than to get a
+well-shapen headstone made for her&mdash;which, as I have hinted
+at in the record of the last year, was done and set up.&nbsp; But
+a headstone without an epitaph, is no better than a body without
+the breath of life in&rsquo;t; and so it behoved me to make a
+poesy for the monument, the which I conned and pondered upon for
+many days.&nbsp; I thought as Mrs. Balwhidder, worthy woman as
+she was, did not understand the Latin tongue, it would not do to
+put on what I had to say in that language, as the laird had
+done&mdash;nor indeed would it have been easy, as I found upon
+the experimenting, to tell what I had to tell in Latin, which is
+naturally a crabbed language, and very difficult to write
+properly.&nbsp; I therefore, after mentioning her age and the
+dates of her birth and departure, composed in sedate poetry the
+following epitaph, which may yet be seen on the tombstone.</p>
+<blockquote><p style="text-align: center">EPITAPH</p>
+<p>A lovely Christian, spouse, and friend,<br />
+Pleasant in life, and at her end.&mdash;<br />
+A pale consumption dealt the blow<br />
+That laid her here, with dust below.<br />
+Sore was the cough that shook her frame;<br />
+That cough her patience did proclaim&mdash;<br />
+And as she drew her latest breath,<br />
+She said, &ldquo;The Lord is sweet in death.&rdquo;<br />
+O pious reader! standing by,<br />
+Learn like this gentle one to die.<br />
+The grass doth grow and fade away,<br />
+And time runs out by night and day;<br />
+The King of Terrors has command<br />
+To strike us with his dart in hand.<br />
+Go where we will by flood or field,<br />
+He will pursue and make us yield.<br />
+But though to him we must resign<br />
+The vesture of our part divine,<br />
+There is a jewel in our trust,<br />
+That will not perish in the dust,<br />
+A pearl of price, a precious gem,<br />
+Ordained for Jesus&rsquo; diadem;<br />
+Therefore, be holy while you can,<br />
+And think upon the doom of man.<br />
+Repent in time and sin no more,<br />
+That when the strife of life is o&rsquo;er,<br />
+On wings of love your soul may rise,<br />
+To dwell with angels in the skies,<br />
+Where psalms are sung eternally,<br />
+And martyrs ne&rsquo;er again shall die;<br />
+But with the saints still bask in bliss,<br />
+And drink the cup of blessedness.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<p>This was greatly thought of at the time, and Mr. Lorimore, who
+had a nerve for poesy himself in his younger years, was of
+opinion that it was so much to the purpose, and suitable withal,
+that he made his scholars write it out for their examination
+copies, at the reading whereof before the heritors, when the
+examination of the school came round, the tear came into my eye,
+and every one present sympathized with me in my great affliction
+for the loss of the first Mrs. Balwhidder.</p>
+<p>Andrew Langshaw, as I have recorded, having come from the
+Glasgow College to the burial of his sister, my wife that was,
+stayed with me a month to keep me company; and staying with me,
+he was a great cordial, for the weather was wet and sleety, and
+the nights were stormy, so that I could go little out, and few of
+the elders came in, they being at that time old men in a feckless
+condition, not at all qualified to warsle with the blasts of
+winter.&nbsp; But when Andrew left me to go back to his classes,
+I was eerie and lonesome; and but for the getting of the monument
+ready, which was a blessed entertainment to me in those dreary
+nights, with consulting anent the shape of it with John Truel,
+and meditating on the verse for the epitaph, I might have gone
+altogether demented.&nbsp; However, it pleased Him, who is the
+surety of the sinner, to help me through the Slough of Despond,
+and to set my feet on firm land, establishing my way thereon.</p>
+<p>But the work of the monument, and the epitaph, could not
+endure for a constancy, and after it was done, I was again in
+great danger of sinking into the hypochonderies a second
+time.&nbsp; However, I was enabled to fight with my affliction,
+and by-and-by, as the spring began to open her green lattice, and
+to set out her flower-pots to the sunshine, and the time of the
+singing of birds was come, I became more composed, and like
+myself, so I often walked in the fields, and held communion with
+nature, and wondered at the mysteries thereof.</p>
+<p>On one of these occasions, as I was sauntering along the edge
+of Eaglesham-wood, looking at the industrious bee going from
+flower to flower, and the idle butterfly, that layeth up no
+store, but perisheth ere it is winter, I felt as it were a spirit
+from on high descending upon me, a throb at my heart, and a
+thrill in my brain, and I was transported out of myself, and
+seized with the notion of writing a book&mdash;but what it should
+be about, I could not settle to my satisfaction.&nbsp; Sometimes
+I thought of an orthodox poem, like <i>Paradise Lost</i>, by John
+Milton, wherein I proposed to treat more at large of Original
+Sin, and the great mystery of Redemption; at others, I fancied
+that a connect treatise on the efficacy of Free Grace would be
+more taking; but although I made divers beginnings in both
+subjects, some new thought ever came into my head, and the whole
+summer passed away and nothing was done.&nbsp; I therefore
+postponed my design of writing a book till the winter, when I
+would have the benefit of the long nights.&nbsp; Before that,
+however, I had other things of more importance to think
+about.&nbsp; My servant lasses, having no eye of a mistress over
+them, wastered every thing at such a rate, and made such a
+galravitching in the house, that, long before the end of the
+year, the year&rsquo;s stipend was all spent, and I did not know
+what to do.&nbsp; At lang and length I mustered courage to send
+for Mr. Auld, who was then living, and an elder.&nbsp; He was a
+douce and discreet man, fair and well-doing in the world, and had
+a better handful of strong common sense than many even of the
+heritors.&nbsp; So I told him how I was situated, and conferred
+with him; and he advised me, for my own sake, to look out for
+another wife as soon as decency would allow, which he thought
+might very properly be after the turn of the year, by which time
+the first Mrs. Balwhidder would be dead more than twelve months;
+and when I mentioned my design to write a book, he said, (and he
+was a man of good discretion), that the doing of the book was a
+thing that would keep, but masterful servants were a growing
+evil; so, upon his counselling, I resolved not to meddle with the
+book till I was married again, but employ the interim, between
+then and the turn of the year, in looking out for a prudent woman
+to be my second wife, strictly intending, as I did perform, not
+to mint a word about my choice, if I made one, till the whole
+twelve months and a day, from the date of the first Mrs.
+Balwhidder&rsquo;s interment, had run out.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p40b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"Sabbath Morning"
+title=
+"Sabbath Morning"
+ src="images/p40s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>In this the hand of Providence was very visible, and lucky for
+me it was that I had sent for Mr. Auld when I did send, as the
+very week following, a sound began to spread in the parish, that
+one of my lassies had got herself with bairn, which was an awful
+thing to think had happened in the house of her master, and that
+master a minister of the gospel.&nbsp; Some there were, for
+backbiting appertaineth to all conditions, that jealoused and
+wondered if I had not a finger in the pie; which, when Mr. Auld
+heard, he bestirred himself in such a manful and godly way in my
+defence, as silenced the clash, telling that I was utterly
+incapable of any such thing, being a man of a guileless heart,
+and a spiritual simplicity, that would be ornamental in a
+child.&nbsp; We then had the latheron summoned before the
+session, and was not long of making her confess that the father
+was Nichol Snipe, Lord Glencairn&rsquo;s gamekeeper; and both her
+and Nichol were obligated to stand in the kirk: but Nichol was a
+graceless reprobate, for he came with two coats, one buttoned
+behind him, and another buttoned before him, and two wigs of my
+lord&rsquo;s, lent him by the valet-de-chamer; the one over his
+face, and the other in the right way; and he stood with his face
+to the church-wall.&nbsp; When I saw him from the poopit, I said
+to him&mdash;&ldquo;Nichol, you must turn your face towards
+me!&rdquo;&nbsp; At the which, he turned round to be sure, but
+there he presented the same show as his back.&nbsp; I was
+confounded, and did not know what to say, but cried out with a
+voice of anger&mdash;&ldquo;Nichol, Nichol! if ye had been
+a&rsquo; back, ye wouldna hae been there this day;&rdquo; which
+had such an effect on the whole congregation, that the poor
+fellow suffered afterwards more derision, than if I had rebuked
+him in the manner prescribed by the session.</p>
+<p>This affair, with the previous advice of Mr. Auld, was,
+however, a warning to me, that no pastor of his parish should be
+long without a helpmate.&nbsp; Accordingly, as soon as the year
+was out, I set myself earnestly about the search for one; but as
+the particulars fall properly within the scope and chronicle of
+the next year, I must reserve them for it; and I do not recollect
+that any thing more particular befell in this, excepting that
+William Mutchkins, the father of Mr. Mutchkins, the great
+spirit-dealer in Glasgow, set up a change-house in the clachan,
+which was the first in the parish, and which, if I could have
+helped, would have been the last; for it was opening a howf to
+all manner of wickedness, and was an immediate get and offspring
+of the smuggling trade, against which I had so set my
+countenance.&nbsp; But William Mutchkins himself was a
+respectable man, and no house could be better ordered than his
+change.&nbsp; At a stated hour he made family worship, for he
+brought up his children in the fear of God and the Christian
+religion; and although the house was full, he would go in to the
+customers, and ask them if they would want anything for half an
+hour, for that he was going to make exercise with his family; and
+many a wayfaring traveller has joined in the prayer.&nbsp; There
+is no such thing, I fear, nowadays, of publicans entertaining
+travellers in this manner.</p>
+<h2><a name="page44"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+44</span>CHAPTER VI<br />
+YEAR 1765</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">As</span> there was little in the last
+year that concerned the parish, but only myself, so in this the
+like fortune continued; and saving a rise in the price of barley,
+occasioned, as was thought, by the establishment of a house for
+brewing whisky in a neighbouring parish, it could not be said
+that my people were exposed to the mutations and influences of
+the stars, which ruled in the seasons of Ann. Dom. 1765.&nbsp; In
+the winter there was a dearth of fuel, such as has not been
+since; for when the spring loosened the bonds of the ice, three
+new coal-heughs were shanked in the Douray moor, and ever since
+there has been a great plenty of that necessary article.&nbsp;
+Truly, it is very wonderful to see how things come round.&nbsp;
+When the talk was about the shanking of their heughs, and a paper
+to get folk to take shares in them, was carried through the
+circumjacent parishes, it was thought a gowk&rsquo;s errand; but
+no sooner was the coal reached, but up sprung such a traffic,
+that it was a godsend to the parish, and the opening of a trade
+and commerce, that has, to use an old byword, brought gold in
+gowpins amang us.&nbsp; From that time my stipend has been on the
+regular increase, and therefore I think that the incoming of the
+heritors must have been in like manner augmented.</p>
+<p>Soon after this, the time was drawing near for my second
+marriage.&nbsp; I had placed my affections, with due
+consideration, on Miss Lizy Kibbock, the well brought-up daughter
+of Mr. Joseph Kibbock of the Gorbyholm, who was the first that
+made a speculation in the farming way in Ayrshire, and whose
+cheese were of such an excellent quality, that they have, under
+the name of Delap-cheese, spread far and wide over the civilized
+world.&nbsp; Miss Lizy and me were married on the 29th day of
+April, with some inconvenience to both sides, on account of the
+dread that we had of being married in May; for it is
+said&mdash;</p>
+<blockquote><p>&ldquo;Of the marriages in May,<br />
+The bairns die of a decay.&rdquo;</p>
+</blockquote>
+<p>However, married we were, and we hired the Irville chaise, and
+with Miss Jenny her sister, and Becky Cairns her niece, who sat
+on a portmanty at our feet, we went on a pleasure jaunt to
+Glasgow, where we bought a miracle of useful things for the
+manse, that neither the first Mrs. Balwhidder nor me ever thought
+of; but the second Mrs. Balwhidder that was, had a geni for
+management, and it was extraordinary what she could go
+through.&nbsp; Well may I speak of her with commendations; for
+she was the bee that made my honey, although at first things did
+not go so clear with us.&nbsp; For she found the manse rookit and
+herrit, and there was such a supply of plenishing of all sort
+wanted, that I thought myself ruined and undone by her care and
+industry.&nbsp; There was such a buying of wool to make blankets,
+with a booming of the meikle wheel to spin the same, and such
+birring of the little wheel for sheets and napery, that the manse
+was for many a day like an organ kist.&nbsp; Then we had milk
+cows, and the calves to bring up, and a kirning of butter, and a
+making of cheese; in short, I was almost by myself with the
+jangle and din, which prevented me from writing a book as I had
+proposed, and I for a time thought of the peaceful and kindly
+nature of the first Mrs. Balwhidder with a sigh; but the
+outcoming was soon manifest.&nbsp; The second Mrs. Balwhidder
+sent her butter on the market-days to Irville, and her cheese
+from time to time to Glasgow, to Mrs. Firlot, that kept the
+huxtry in the Saltmarket; and they were both so well made, that
+our dairy was just a coining of money, insomuch that, after the
+first year, we had the whole tot of my stipend to put untouched
+into the bank.</p>
+<p>But I must say, that although we were thus making siller like
+sclate stones, I was not satisfied in my own mind that I had got
+the manse merely to be a factory of butter and cheese, and to
+breed up veal calves for the slaughter; so I spoke to the second
+Mrs. Balwhidder, and pointed out to her what I thought the error
+of our way; but she had been so ingrained with the profitable
+management of cows and grumphies in her father&rsquo;s house,
+that she could not desist, at the which I was greatly
+grieved.&nbsp; By-and-by, however, I began to discern that there
+was something as good in her example, as the giving of alms to
+the poor folk; for all the wives of the parish were stirred up by
+it into a wonderful thrift, and nothing was heard of in every
+house, but of quiltings and wabs to weave; insomuch that, before
+many years came round, there was not a better stocked parish,
+with blankets and napery, than mine was, within the bounds of
+Scotland.</p>
+<p>It was about the Michaelmas of this year that Mrs. Malcolm
+opened her shop, which she did chiefly on the advice of Mrs.
+Balwhidder, who said it was far better to allow a little profit
+on the different haberdasheries that might be wanted, than to
+send to the neighbouring towns an end&rsquo;s errand on purpose
+for them, none of the lasses that were so sent ever thinking of
+making less than a day&rsquo;s play on every such occasion.&nbsp;
+In a word, it is not to be told how the second Mrs. Balwhidder,
+my wife, showed the value of flying time, even to the concerns of
+this world, and was the mean of giving a life and energy to the
+housewifery of the parish, that has made many a one beek his
+shins in comfort, that would otherwise have had but a cold coal
+to blow at.&nbsp; Indeed, Mr. Kibbock, her father, was a man
+beyond the common, and had an insight of things, by which he was
+enabled to draw profit and advantage, where others could only see
+risk and detriment.&nbsp; He planted mounts of fir-trees on the
+bleak and barren tops of the hills of his farm, the which
+everybody, and I among the rest, considered as a thrashing of the
+water and raising of bells.&nbsp; But as his rack ran his trees
+grew, and the plantations supplied him with stabs to make
+<i>stake and rice</i> between his fields, which soon gave them a
+trig and orderly appearance, such as had never before been seen
+in the west country; and his example has, in this matter, been so
+followed, that I have heard travellers say, who have been in
+foreign countries, that the shire of Ayr, for its bonny round
+green plantings on the tops of the hills, is above comparison
+either with Italy or Switzerland, where the hills are, as it
+were, in a state of nature.</p>
+<p>Upon the whole, this was a busy year in the parish, and the
+seeds of many great improvements were laid.&nbsp; The
+king&rsquo;s road, the which then ran through the Vennel, was
+mended; but it was not till some years after, as I shall record
+by-and-by, that the trust-road, as it was called, was made, the
+which had the effect of turning the town inside out.</p>
+<p>Before I conclude, it is proper to mention that the kirk-bell,
+which had to this time, from time immemorial, hung on an
+ash-tree, was one stormy night cast down by the breaking of the
+branch, which was the cause of the heritors agreeing to build the
+steeple.&nbsp; The clock was a mortification to the parish from
+the Lady Breadland, when she died some years after.</p>
+<h2><a name="page50"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+50</span>CHAPTER VII<br />
+YEAR 1766</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> was in this Ann. Dom. that the
+great calamity happened, the which took place on a Sabbath
+evening in the month of February.&nbsp; Mrs. Balwhidder had just
+infused or masket the tea, and we were set round the fireside, to
+spend the night in an orderly and religious manner, along with
+Mr. and Mrs. Petticrew, who were on a friendly visitation to the
+manse, the mistress being full cousin to Mrs.
+Balwhidder.&mdash;Sitting, as I was saying, at our tea, one of
+the servant lasses came into the room with a sort of a panic
+laugh, and said, &ldquo;What are ye all doing there when the
+Breadland&rsquo;s in a low?&rdquo;&mdash;&ldquo;The Breadland in
+a low!&rdquo; cried I.&mdash;&ldquo;Oh, ay!&rdquo; cried she;
+&ldquo;bleezing at the windows and the rigging, and out at the
+lum, like a killogie.&rdquo;&nbsp; Upon the which, we all went to
+the door, and there, to be sure, we did see that the Breadland
+was burning, the flames crackling high out o&rsquo;er the trees,
+and the sparks flying like a comet&rsquo;s tail in the
+firmament.</p>
+<p>Seeing this sight, I said to Mr. Petticrew, that, in the
+strength of the Lord, I would go and see what could be done, for
+it was as plain as the sun in the heavens that the ancient place
+of the Breadlands would be destroyed; whereupon he accorded to go
+with me, and we walked at a lively course to the spot, and the
+people from all quarters were pouring in, and it was an awsome
+scene.&nbsp; But the burning of the house, and the droves of the
+multitude, were nothing to what we saw when we got forenent the
+place.&nbsp; There was the rafters crackling, the flames raging,
+the servants running, some with bedding, some with
+looking-glasses, and others with chamber utensils as little
+likely to be fuel to the fire, but all testifications to the
+confusion and alarm.&nbsp; Then there was a shout,
+&ldquo;Whar&rsquo;s Miss Girzie? whar&rsquo;s the
+Major?&rdquo;&nbsp; The Major, poor man, soon cast up, lying upon
+a feather-bed, ill with his complaints, in the garden; but Lady
+Skimmilk was nowhere to be found.&nbsp; At last, a figure was
+seen in the upper flat, pursued by the flames, and that was Miss
+Girzie.&nbsp; Oh! it was a terrible sight to look at her in that
+jeopardy at the window, with her gold watch in the one hand and
+the silver teapot in the other, skreighing like desperation for a
+ladder and help.&nbsp; But, before a ladder or help could be
+found, the floor sunk down, and the roof fell in, and poor Miss
+Girzie, with her idols, perished in the burning.&nbsp; It was a
+dreadful business!&nbsp; I think, to this hour, how I saw her at
+the window, how the fire came in behind her, and claught her like
+a fiery Belzebub, and bore her into perdition before our
+eyes.&nbsp; The next morning the atomy of the body was found
+among the rubbish, with a piece of metal in what had been each of
+its hands, no doubt the gold watch and the silver teapot.&nbsp;
+Such was the end of Miss Girzie; and the Breadland, which the
+young laird, my pupil that was, by growing a resident at
+Edinburgh, never rebuilt.&nbsp; It was burnt to the very ground;
+nothing was spared but what the servants in the first flaught
+gathered up in a hurry and ran with; but no one could tell how
+the Major, who was then, as it was thought by the faculty, past
+the power of nature to recover, got out of the house, and was
+laid on the feather-bed in the garden.&nbsp; However, he never
+got the better of that night, and before Whitsunday he was dead
+too, and buried beside his sister&rsquo;s bones at the south side
+of the kirkyard dyke, where his cousin&rsquo;s son, that was his
+heir, erected the handsome monument, with the three urns and
+weeping cherubims, bearing witness to the great valour of the
+Major among the Hindoos, as well as other commendable virtues,
+for which, as the epitaph says, he was universally esteemed and
+beloved, by all who knew him, in his public and private
+capacity.</p>
+<p>But although the burning of the Breadland-House was justly
+called the great calamity, on account of what happened to Miss
+Girzie with her gold watch and silver teapot; yet, as Providence
+never fails to bring good out of evil, it turned out a
+catastrophe that proved advantageous to the parish; for the
+laird, instead of thinking to build it up, was advised to let the
+policy out as a farm, and the tack was taken by Mr. Coulter, than
+whom there had been no such man in the agriculturing line among
+us before, not even excepting Mr. Kibbock of the Gorbyholm, my
+father-in-law that was.&nbsp; Of the stabling, Mr. Coulter made a
+comfortable dwelling-house; and having rugget out the evergreens
+and other unprofitable plants, saving the twa ancient yew-trees
+which the near-begaun Major and his sister had left to go to ruin
+about the mansion-house, he turned all to production, and it was
+wonderful what an increase he made the land bring forth.&nbsp; He
+was from far beyond Edinburgh, and had got his insight among the
+Lothian farmers, so that he knew what crop should follow another,
+and nothing could surpass the regularity of his rigs and
+furrows.&mdash;Well do I remember the admiration that I had,
+when, in a fine sunny morning of the first spring after he took
+the Breadland, I saw his braird on what had been the cows&rsquo;
+grass, as even and pretty as if it had been worked and stripped
+in the loom with a shuttle.&nbsp; Truly, when I look back at the
+example he set, and when I think on the method and dexterity of
+his management, I must say, that his coming to the parish was a
+great godsend, and tended to do far more for the benefit of my
+people, than if the young laird had rebuilded the Breadland-House
+in a fashionable style, as was at one time spoken of.</p>
+<p>But the year of the great calamity was memorable for another
+thing:&mdash;in the December foregoing, the wind blew, as I have
+recorded in the chronicle of the last year, and broke down the
+bough of the tree whereon the kirk-bell had hung from the time,
+as was supposed, of the persecution, before the bringing over of
+King William.&nbsp; Mr. Kibbock, my father-in-law then that was,
+being a man of a discerning spirit, when he heard of the
+unfortunate fall of the bell, advised me to get the heritors to
+big a steeple; but which, when I thought of the expense, I was
+afraid to do.&nbsp; He, however, having a great skill in the
+heart of man, gave me no rest on the subject; but told me, that
+if I allowed the time to go by till the heritors were used to
+come to the kirk without a bell, I would get no steeple at
+all.&nbsp; I often wondered what made Mr. Kibbock so fond of a
+steeple, which is a thing that I never could see a good reason
+for, saving that it is an ecclesiastical adjunct, like the gown
+and bands.&nbsp; However, he set me on to get a steeple proposed,
+and after no little argol-bargling with the heritors, it was
+agreed to.&nbsp; This was chiefly owing to the instrumentality of
+Lady Moneyplack, who, in that winter, was much subjected to the
+rheumatics, she having, one cold and raw Sunday morning, there
+being no bell to announce the time, come half an hour too soon to
+the kirk, made her bestir herself to get an interest awakened
+among the heritors in behalf of a steeple.</p>
+<p>But when the steeple was built, a new contention arose.&nbsp;
+It was thought that the bell, which had been used in the
+ash-tree, would not do in a stone and lime fabric; so, after
+great agitation among the heritors, it was resolved to sell the
+old bell to a foundery in Glasgow, and buy a new bell suitable to
+the steeple, which was a very comely fabric.&nbsp; The buying of
+the new bell led to other considerations, and the old Lady
+Breadland, being at the time in a decaying condition, and making
+her will, she left a mortification to the parish, as I have
+intimated, to get a clock; so that, by the time the steeple was
+finished, and the bell put up, the Lady Breadland&rsquo;s legacy
+came to be implemented, according to the ordination of the
+testatrix.</p>
+<p>Of the casualities that happened in this year, I should not
+forget to put down, as a thing for remembrance, that an aged
+woman, one Nanse Birrel, a distillator of herbs, and well skilled
+in the healing of sores, who had a great repute among the
+quarriers and colliers&mdash;she having gone to the physic well
+in the sandy hills to draw water, was found, with her feet
+uppermost in the well, by some of the bairns of Mr.
+Lorimore&rsquo;s school; and there was a great debate whether
+Nanse had fallen in by accident head foremost, or, in a
+temptation, thrown herself in that position, with her feet
+sticking up to the evil one; for Nanse was a curious discontented
+blear-eyed woman, and it was only with great ado that I could get
+the people keepit from calling her a witchwife.</p>
+<p>I should likewise place on record, that the first ass that had
+ever been seen in this part of the country, came in the course of
+this year with a gang of tinklers, that made horn-spoons and
+mended bellows.&nbsp; Where they came from never was well made
+out; but being a blackaviced crew, they were generally thought to
+be Egyptians.&nbsp; They tarried about a week among us, living in
+tents, with their little ones squattling among the litter; and
+one of the older men of them set and tempered to me two razors,
+that were as good as nothing, but which he made better than when
+they were new.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p56b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Old Ploughman"
+title=
+"The Old Ploughman"
+ src="images/p56s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>Shortly after, but I am not quite sure whether it was in the
+end of this year, or the beginning of the next, although I have a
+notion that it was in this, there came over from Ireland a troop
+of wild Irish, seeking for work as they said; but they made free
+quarters, for they herrit the roosts of the clachan, and cutted
+the throat of a sow of ours, the carcass of which they no doubt
+intended to steal; but something came over them, and it was found
+lying at the back side of the manse, to the great vexation of
+Mrs. Balwhidder; for she had set her mind on a clecking of pigs,
+and only waited for the China boar, that had been brought down
+from London by Lord Eaglesham, to mend the breed of pork&mdash;a
+profitable commodity, that her father, Mr. Kibbock, cultivated
+for the Glasgow market.&nbsp; The destruction of our sow, under
+such circumstances, was therefore held to be a great crime and
+cruelty, and it had the effect to raise up such a spirit in the
+clachan, that the Irish were obligated to decamp; and they set
+out for Glasgow, where one of them was afterwards hanged for a
+fact, but the truth concerning how he did it, I either never
+heard, or it has passed from my mind, like many other things I
+should have carefully treasured.</p>
+<h2><a name="page58"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+58</span>CHAPTER VIII<br />
+YEAR 1767</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">All</span> things in our parish were now
+beginning to shoot up into a great prosperity.&nbsp; The spirit
+of farming began to get the upper hand of the spirit of
+smuggling, and the coal-heughs that had been opened in the
+Douray, now brought a pour of money among us.&nbsp; In the manse,
+the thrift and frugality of the second Mrs. Balwhidder throve
+exceedingly, so that we could save the whole stipend for the
+bank.</p>
+<p>The king&rsquo;s highway, as I have related in the foregoing,
+ran through the Vennel, which was a narrow and a crooked street,
+with many big stones here and there, and every now and then, both
+in the spring and the fall, a gathering of middens for the
+fields; insomuch that the coal-carts from the Douray moor were
+often reested in the middle of the causey, and on more than one
+occasion some of them laired altogether in the middens, and
+others of them broke down.&nbsp; Great complaint was made by the
+carters anent these difficulties, and there was, for many a day,
+a talk and sound of an alteration and amendment; but nothing was
+fulfilled in the matter till the month of March in this year,
+when the Lord Eaglesham was coming from London to see the new
+lands that he had bought in our parish.&nbsp; His lordship was a
+man of a genteel spirit, and very fond of his horses, which were
+the most beautiful creatures of their kind that had been seen in
+all the country side.&nbsp; Coming, as I was noting, to see his
+new lands, he was obliged to pass through the clachan one day,
+when all the middens were gathered out, reeking and sappy, in the
+middle of the causey.&nbsp; Just as his lordship was driving in
+with his prancing steeds, like a Jehu, at one end of the vennel,
+a long string of loaded coal-carts came in at the other, and
+there was hardly room for my lord to pass them.&nbsp; What was to
+be done?&nbsp; His lordship could not turn back, and the
+coal-carts were in no less perplexity.&nbsp; Every body was out
+of doors to see and to help; when, in trying to get his
+lordship&rsquo;s carriage over the top of a midden, the horses
+gave a sudden loup, and couped the coach, and threw my lord, head
+foremost, into the very scent-bottle of the whole commodity,
+which made him go perfect mad, and he swore like a trooper that
+he would get an act of parliament to put down the
+nuisance&mdash;the which now ripened in the course of this year
+into the undertaking of the trust-road.</p>
+<p>His lordship, being in a woeful plight, left the carriage and
+came to the manse, till his servant went to the castle for a
+change for him; but he could not wait nor abide himself: so he
+got the lend of my best suit of clothes, and was wonderful jocose
+both with Mrs. Balwhidder and me, for he was a portly man, and I
+but a thin body, and it was really a droll curiosity to see his
+lordship clad in my garments.</p>
+<p>Out of this accident grew a sort of a neighbourliness between
+that Lord Eaglesham and me; so that when Andrew Lanshaw, the
+brother that was of the first Mrs. Balwhidder, came to think of
+going to India, I wrote to my lord for his behoof, and his
+lordship got him sent out as a cadet, and was extraordinary
+discreet to Andrew when he went up to London to take his passage,
+speaking to him of me as if I had been a very saint, which the
+Searcher of Hearts knows I am far from thinking myself.</p>
+<p>But to return to the making of the trust-road, which, as I
+have said, turned the town inside out.&nbsp; It was agreed among
+the heritors, that it should run along the back side of the south
+houses; and that there should be steadings fued off on each side,
+according to a plan that was laid down; and this being gone into,
+the town gradually, in the course of years, grew up into that
+orderlyness which makes it now a pattern to the country
+side&mdash;all which was mainly owing to the accident that befell
+the Lord Eaglesham, which is a clear proof how improvements come
+about, as it were, by the immediate instigation of Providence,
+which should make the heart of man humble, and change his eyes of
+pride and haughtiness into a lowly demeanour.</p>
+<p>But although this making of the trust-road was surely a great
+thing for the parish, and of an advantage to my people, we met,
+in this year, with a loss not to be compensated&mdash;that was
+the death of Nanse Banks, the schoolmistress.&nbsp; She had been
+long in a weak and frail state; but being a methodical creature,
+still kept on the school, laying the foundation for many a worthy
+wife and mother.&nbsp; However, about the decline of the year her
+complaints increased, and she sent for me to consult about her
+giving up the school; and I went to see her on Saturday
+afternoon, when the bit lassies, her scholars, had put the house
+in order, and gone home till the Monday.</p>
+<p>She was sitting in the window-nook, reading <span
+class="GutSmall">THE WORD</span> to herself, when I entered; but
+she closed the book, and put her spectacles in for a mark when
+she saw me; and, as it was expected I would come, her easy-chair,
+with a clean cover, had been set out for me by the scholars, by
+which I discerned that there was something more than common to
+happen, and so it appeared when I had taken my seat.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Sir,&rdquo; said she, &ldquo;I hae sent for you on a
+thing troubles me sairly.&nbsp; I have warsled with poortith in
+this shed, which it has pleased the Lord to allow me to possess;
+but my strength is worn out, and I fear I maun yield in the
+strife;&rdquo; and she wiped her eye with her apron.&nbsp; I told
+her, however, to be of good cheer; and then she said, &ldquo;That
+she could no longer thole the din of the school, and that she was
+weary, and ready to lay herself down to die whenever the Lord was
+pleased to permit.&rdquo;&nbsp; &ldquo;But,&rdquo; continued she,
+&ldquo;what can I do without the school; and, alas!&nbsp; I can
+neither work nor want; and I am wae to go on the session, for I
+am come of a decent family.&rdquo;&nbsp; I comforted her, and
+told her, that I thought she had done so much good in the parish,
+that the session was deep in her debt, and that what they might
+give her was but a just payment for her service.&nbsp; &ldquo;I
+would rather, however, sir,&rdquo; said she, &ldquo;try first
+what some of my auld scholars will do, and it was for that I
+wanted to speak with you.&nbsp; If some of them would but just,
+from time to time, look in upon me, that I may not die alane; and
+the little pick and drap that I require would not be hard upon
+them&mdash;I am more sure that in this way their gratitude would
+be no discredit, than I am of having any claim on the
+session.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>As I had always a great respect for an honest pride, I assured
+her that I would do what she wanted; and accordingly, the very
+morning after, being Sabbath, I preached a sermon on the
+helplessness of them that have no help of man, meaning aged
+single women, living in garret-rooms, whose forlorn state, in the
+gloaming of life, I made manifest to the hearts and
+understandings of the congregation, in such a manner that many
+shed tears, and went away sorrowful.</p>
+<p>Having thus roused the feelings of my people, I went round the
+houses on the Monday morning, and mentioned what I had to say
+more particularly about poor old Nanse Banks, the schoolmistress,
+and truly I was rejoiced at the condition of the hearts of my
+people.&nbsp; There was a universal sympathy among them; and it
+was soon ordered that, what with one and another, her decay
+should be provided for.&nbsp; But it was not ordained that she
+should be long heavy on their good-will.&nbsp; On the Monday the
+school was given up, and there was nothing but wailing among the
+bit lassies, the scholars, for getting the vacance, as the poor
+things said, because the mistress was going to lie down to
+dee.&nbsp; And, indeed, so it came to pass; for she took to her
+bed the same afternoon, and, in the course of the week, dwindled
+away, and slipped out of this howling wilderness into the kingdom
+of heaven, on the Sabbath following, as quietly as a blessed
+saint could do.&nbsp; And here I should mention, that the Lady
+Macadam, when I told her of Nanse Banks&rsquo;s case, enquired if
+she was a snuffer, and, being answered by me that she was, her
+ladyship sent her a pretty French enamel box full of macabaw, a
+fine snuff that she had in a bottle; and, among the macabaw, was
+found a guinea, at the bottom of the box, after Nanse Banks had
+departed this life, which was a kind thing of Lady Macadam to
+do.</p>
+<p>About the close of this year there was a great sough of old
+prophecies, foretelling mutations and adversities, chiefly on
+account of the canal that was spoken of to join the rivers of the
+Clyde and the Forth, it being thought an impossible thing to be
+done; and the Adam and Eve pear-tree, in our garden, budded out
+in an awful manner, and had divers flourishes on it at Yule,
+which was thought an ominous thing, especially as the second Mrs.
+Balwhidder was at the downlying with my eldest son Gilbert, that
+is, the merchant in Glasgow; but nothing came o&rsquo;t, and the
+howdie said she had an easy time when the child came into the
+world, which was on the very last day of the year, to the great
+satisfaction of me, and of my people, who were wonderful lifted
+up because their minister had a man-child born unto him.</p>
+<h2><a name="page65"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+65</span>CHAPTER IX<br />
+YEAR 1768</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">It&rsquo;s</span> a surprising thing how
+time flieth away, carrying off our youth and strength, and
+leaving us nothing but wrinkles and the ails of old age.&nbsp;
+Gilbert, my son, that is now a corpulent man, and a Glasgow
+merchant, when I take up my pen to record the memorables of this
+Ann. Dom., seems to me yet but a suckling in swaddling clothes,
+mewing and peevish in the arms of his mother, that has been long
+laid in the cold kirkyard, beside her predecessor, in
+Abraham&rsquo;s bosom.&nbsp; It is not, however, my design to
+speak much anent my own affairs, which would be a very improper
+and uncomely thing, but only of what happened in the parish, this
+book being for a witness and testimony of my ministry.&nbsp;
+Therefore, setting out of view both me and mine, I will now
+resuscitate the concerns of Mrs. Malcolm and her children; for,
+as I think, never was there such a visible preordination seen in
+the lives of any persons, as was seen in that of this worthy
+decent woman, and her well-doing off-spring.&nbsp; Her morning
+was raw, and a sore blight fell upon her fortunes; but the sun
+looked out on her midday, and her evening closed loun and warm;
+and the stars of the firmament, that are the eyes of heaven,
+beamed as it were with gladness, when she lay down to sleep the
+sleep of rest.</p>
+<p>Her son Charles was by this time grown up into a stout buirdly
+lad, and it was expected that, before the return of the Tobacco
+trader, he would have been out of his time, and a man afore the
+mast, which was a great step of preferment, as I heard say by
+persons skilled in seafaring concerns.&nbsp; But this was not
+ordered to happen; for, when the Tobacco trader was lying in the
+harbour of Virginia in the North Americas, a pressgang, that was
+in need of men for a man-of-war, came on board, and pressed poor
+Charles, and sailed away with him on a cruise, nobody, for many a
+day, could tell where, till I thought of the Lord
+Eaglesham&rsquo;s kindness.&nbsp; His lordship having something
+to say with the king&rsquo;s government, I wrote to him, telling
+him who I was, and how jocose he had been when buttoned in my
+clothes, that he might recollect me, thanking him, at the same
+time, for his condescension and patronage to Andrew Lanshaw, in
+his way to the East Indies.&nbsp; I then slipped in, at the end
+of the letter, a bit nota-bene concerning the case of Charles
+Malcolm, begging his lordship, on account of the poor lad&rsquo;s
+widow mother, to enquire at the government if they could tell us
+any thing about Charles.&nbsp; In the due course of time, I got a
+most civil reply from his lordship, stating all about the name of
+the man-of-war, and where she was; and at the conclusion his
+lordship said, that I was lucky in having the brother of a Lord
+of the Admiralty on this occasion for my agent, as otherwise,
+from the vagueness of my statement, the information might not
+have been procured; which remark of his lordship was long a great
+riddle to me; for I could not think what he meant about an agent,
+till, in the course of the year, we heard that his own brother
+was concerned in the admiralty; so that all his lordship meant
+was only to crack a joke with me, and that he was ever ready and
+free to do, as shall be related in the sequel, for he was an
+excellent man.</p>
+<p>There being a vacancy for a schoolmistress, it was proposed to
+Mrs. Malcolm, that, under her superintendence, her daughter Kate,
+that had been learning great artifices in needle-work so long
+with Lady Macadam, should take up the school, and the session
+undertook to make good to Kate the sum of five pounds sterling
+per annum, over and above what the scholars were to pay.&nbsp;
+But Mrs. Malcolm said she had not strength herself to warsle with
+so many unruly brats, and that Kate, though a fine lassie, was a
+tempestuous spirit, and might lame some of the bairns in her
+passion; and that selfsame night, Lady Macadam wrote me a very
+complaining letter, for trying to wile away her companion; but
+her ladyship was a canary-headed woman, and given to flights and
+tantrums, having in her youth been a great toast among the
+quality.&nbsp; It would, however, have saved her from a sore
+heart, had she never thought of keeping Kate Malcolm.&nbsp; For
+this year her only son, who was learning the art of war at an
+academy in France, came to pay her, his lady mother, a
+visit.&nbsp; He was a brisk and light-hearted stripling, and Kate
+Malcolm was budding into a very rose of beauty; so between them a
+hankering began, which, for a season, was productive of great
+heaviness of heart to the poor old cripple lady; indeed, she
+assured me herself, that all her rheumatics were nothing to the
+heart-ache which she suffered in the progress of this
+business.&nbsp; But that will be more treated of hereafter;
+suffice it to say for the present, that we have thus recorded how
+the plan for making Kate Malcolm our schoolmistress came to
+nought.&nbsp; It pleased, however, Him, from whom cometh every
+good and perfect gift, to send at this time among us a Miss
+Sabrina Hooky, the daughter of old Mr. Hooky, who had been
+schoolmaster in a neighbouring parish.&nbsp; She had gone, after
+his death, to live with an auntie in Glasgow, that kept a shop in
+the Gallowgate.&nbsp; It was thought that the old woman would
+have left her heir to all her gatherings, and so she said she
+would, but alas! our life is but within our lip.&nbsp; Before her
+testament was made, she was carried suddenly off by an
+apoplectick, an awful monument of the uncertainty of time and the
+nearness of eternity, in her own shop, as she was in the very act
+of weighing out an ounce of snuff to a professor of the College,
+as Miss Sabrina herself told me.&nbsp; Being thus destitute, it
+happened that Miss Sabrina heard of the vacancy in our parish, as
+it were, just by the cry of a passing bird, for she could not
+tell how; although I judge myself that William Keckle the elder
+had a hand in it, as he was at the time in Glasgow; and she wrote
+me a wonderful well-penned letter bespeaking the situation, which
+letter came to hand on the morn following Lady Macadam&rsquo;s
+stramash to me about Kate Malcolm, and I laid it before the
+session the same day; so that, by the time her auntie&rsquo;s
+concern was taken off her hands, she had a home and a howf among
+us to come in, to the which she lived upwards of thirty years in
+credit and respect, although some thought she had not the art of
+her predecessor, and was more uppish in her carriage than
+befitted the decorum of her vocation.&nbsp; Hers, however, was
+but a harmless vanity; and, poor woman, she needed all manner of
+graces to set her out; for she was made up of odds and ends, and
+had but one good eye, the other being blind, and just like a blue
+bead.&nbsp; At first she plainly set her cap for Mr. Lorimore,
+but after oggling and goggling at him every Sunday in the kirk
+for a whole half-year and more, Miss Sabrina desisted in
+despair.</p>
+<p>But the most remarkable thing about her coming into the
+parish, was the change that took place in Christian names among
+us.&nbsp; Old Mr. Hooky, her father, had, from the time he read
+his Virgil, maintained a sort of intromission with the nine
+muses, by which he was led to baptize her Sabrina, after a name
+mentioned by John Milton in one of his works.&nbsp; Miss Sabrina
+began by calling our Jennies Jessies, and our Nannies Nancies;
+alas! I have lived to see even these likewise grow
+old-fashioned.&nbsp; She had also a taste in the mantua-making
+line, which she had learnt in Glasgow; and I could date from the
+very Sabbath of her first appearance in the kirk, a change
+growing in the garb of the younger lassies, who from that day
+began to lay aside the silken plaidie over the head, the which
+had been the pride and bravery of their grandmothers; and instead
+of the snood, that was so snod and simple, they hided their heads
+in round-eared bees-cap mutches, made of gauze and catgut, and
+other curious contrivances of French millendery; all which
+brought a deal of custom to Miss Sabrina, over and above the
+incomings and Candlemas offerings of school; insomuch that she
+saved money, and in the course of three years had ten pounds to
+put in the bank.</p>
+<p>At the time, these alterations and revolutions in the parish
+were thought a great advantage; but now when I look back upon
+them, as a traveller on the hill over the road he has passed, I
+have my doubts.&nbsp; For with wealth come wants, like a troop of
+clamorous beggars at the heels of a generous man; and it&rsquo;s
+hard to tell wherein the benefit of improvement in a country
+parish consists, especially to those who live by the sweat of
+their brow.&nbsp; But it is not for me to make reflections; my
+task and duty is to note the changes of time and habitudes.</p>
+<h2><a name="page72"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+72</span>CHAPTER X<br />
+YEAR 1769</h2>
+<p>I <span class="smcap">have</span> my doubts whether it was in
+the beginning of this year, or in the end of the last, that a
+very extraordinary thing came to light in the parish; but,
+howsoever that may be, there is nothing more certain than the
+fact, which it is my duty to record.&nbsp; I have mentioned
+already how it was that the toll, or trust-road, was set a-going,
+on account of the Lord Eaglesham&rsquo;s tumbling on the midden
+in the Vennel.&nbsp; Well, it happened to one of the labouring
+men, in breaking the stones to make metal for the new road, that
+he broke a stone that was both large and remarkable, and in the
+heart of it, which was boss, there was found a living creature,
+that jumped out the moment it saw the light of heaven, to the
+great terrification of the man, who could think it was nothing
+but an evil spirit that had been imprisoned therein for a
+time.&nbsp; The man came to me like a demented creature, and the
+whole clachan gathered out, young and old, and I went at their
+head to see what the miracle could be, for the man said it was a
+fiery dragon, spewing smoke and flames.&nbsp; But when we came to
+the spot, it was just a yird toad, and the laddie weans nevelled
+it to death with stones, before I could persuade them to give
+over.&nbsp; Since then, I have read of such things coming to
+light in the <i>Scots Magazine</i>, a very valuable book.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p72b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Elder&rsquo;s Wife"
+title=
+"The Elder&rsquo;s Wife"
+ src="images/p72s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>Soon after the affair of &ldquo;the wee deil in the
+stane,&rdquo; as it was called, a sough reached us that the
+Americas were seized with the rebellious spirit of the ten
+tribes, and were snapping their fingers in the face of the
+king&rsquo;s government.&nbsp; The news came on a Saturday night,
+for we had no newspapers in those days, and was brought by Robin
+Modiwort, that fetched the letters from the Irville post.&nbsp;
+Thomas Fullarton (he has been dead many a day) kept the grocery
+shop at Irville, and he had been in at Glasgow, as was his yearly
+custom, to settle his accounts, and to buy a hogshead of tobacco,
+with sugar and other spiceries; and being in Glasgow, Thomas was
+told by the merchant of a great rise in tobacco, that had
+happened by reason of the contumacity of the plantations, and it
+was thought that blood would be spilt before things were ended,
+for that the King and Parliament were in a great passion with
+them.&nbsp; But as Charles Malcolm, in the king&rsquo;s ship, was
+the only one belonging to the parish that was likely to be art
+and part in the business, we were in a manner little troubled at
+the time with this first gasp of the monster of war, who, for our
+sins, was ordained to swallow up and devour so many of our
+fellow-subjects, before he was bound again in the chains of mercy
+and peace.</p>
+<p>I had, in the meantime, written a letter to the Lord
+Eaglesham, to get Charles Malcolm out of the clutches of the
+pressgang in the man-of-war; and about a month after, his
+lordship sent me an answer, wherein was enclosed a letter from
+the captain of the ship, saying, that Charles Malcolm was so good
+a man that he was reluctant to part with him, and that Charles
+himself was well contented to remain aboard.&nbsp; Anent which,
+his lordship said to me, that he had written back to the captain
+to make a midshipman of Charles, and that he would take him under
+his own protection, which was great joy on two accounts to us
+all, especially to his mother; first, to hear that Charles was a
+good man, although in years still but a youth; and, secondly,
+that my lord had, of his own free-will, taken him under the wing
+of his patronage.</p>
+<p>But the sweet of this world is never to be enjoyed without
+some of the sour.&nbsp; The coal bark between Irville and
+Belfast, in which Robert Malcolm, the second son of his mother,
+was serving his time to be a sailor, got a charter, as it was
+called, to go with to Norway for deals, which grieved Mrs.
+Malcolm to the very heart; for there was then no short cut by the
+canal, as now is, between the rivers of the Forth and Clyde, but
+every ship was obligated to go far away round by the Orkneys,
+which, although a voyage in the summer not overly dangerous,
+there being long days and short nights then, yet in the winter it
+was far otherwise, many vessels being frozen up in the Baltic
+till the spring; and there was a story told at the time, of an
+Irville bark coming home in the dead of the year, that lost her
+way altogether, and was supposed to have sailed north into utter
+darkness, for she was never more heard of: and many an awful
+thing was said of what the auld mariners about the shore thought
+concerning the crew of that misfortunate vessel.&nbsp; However,
+Mrs. Malcolm was a woman of great faith, and having placed her
+reliance on Him who is the orphan&rsquo;s stay and widow&rsquo;s
+trust, she resigned her bairn into his hands, with a religious
+submission to his pleasure, though the mother&rsquo;s tear of
+weak human nature was on her cheek and in her e&rsquo;e.&nbsp;
+And her faith was well rewarded, for the vessel brought him safe
+home, and he had seen such a world of things, that it was just to
+read a story-book to hear him tell of Elsineur and Gottenburg,
+and other fine and great places that we had never heard of till
+that time; and he brought me a bottle of Riga balsam, which for
+healing cuts was just miraculous, besides a clear bottle of
+Rososolus for his mother, a spirit which for cordiality could not
+be told; for though since that time we have had many a sort of
+Dantzic cordial, I have never tasted any to compare with Robin
+Malcolm&rsquo;s Rososolus.&nbsp; The Lady Macadam, who had a
+knowledge of such things, declared it was the best of the best
+sort; for Mrs. Malcolm sent her ladyship some of it in a
+doctor&rsquo;s bottle, as well as to Mrs. Balwhidder, who was
+then at the downlying with our daughter Janet&mdash;a woman now
+in the married state, that makes a most excellent wife, having
+been brought up with great pains, and well educated, as I shall
+have to record by-and-by.</p>
+<p>About the Christmas of this year, Lady Macadam&rsquo;s son
+having been perfected in the art of war at a school in France,
+had, with the help of his mother&rsquo;s friends, and his
+father&rsquo;s fame, got a stand of colours in the Royal Scots
+regiment; he came to show himself in his regimentals to his lady
+mother, like a dutiful son, as he certainly was.&nbsp; It
+happened that he was in the kirk in his scarlets and gold, on the
+same Sunday that Robert Malcolm came home from the long voyage to
+Norway for deals; and I thought when I saw the soldier and the
+sailor from the pulpit, that it was an omen of war, among our
+harmless country folks, like swords and cannon amidst ploughs and
+sickles, coming upon us; and I became laden in spirit, and had a
+most weighty prayer upon the occasion, which was long after
+remembered, many thinking, when the American war broke out, that
+I had been gifted with a glimmering of prophecy on that day.</p>
+<p>It was during this visit to his lady mother, that young Laird
+Macadam settled the correspondence with Kate Malcolm, which, in
+the process of time, caused us all so much trouble; for it was a
+clandestine concern: but the time is not yet ripe for me to speak
+of it more at large.&nbsp; I should, however, mention, before
+concluding this annal, that Mrs. Malcolm herself was this winter
+brought to death&rsquo;s door by a terrible host that came on her
+in the kirk, by taking a kittling in her throat.&nbsp; It was a
+terrification to hear her sometimes; but she got the better of it
+in the spring, and was more herself thereafter than she had been
+for years before; and her daughter Effie or Euphemia, as she was
+called by Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress, was growing up to be
+a gleg and clever quean; she was, indeed, such a spirit in her
+way, that the folks called her Spunkie; while her son William,
+that was the youngest of the five, was making a wonderful
+proficiency with Mr. Lorimore.&nbsp; He was indeed a douce,
+well-doing laddie, of a composed nature; insomuch that the master
+said he was surely chosen for the ministry.&nbsp; In short, the
+more I think on what befell this family, and of the great
+meekness and Christian worth of the parent, I verily believe
+there never could have been in any parish such a manifestation of
+the truth, that they who put their trust in the Lord, are sure of
+having a friend that will never forsake them.</p>
+<h2><a name="page78"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+78</span>CHAPTER XI<br />
+YEAR 1770</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> blessed Ann. Dom. was one of
+the Sabbaths of my ministry.&nbsp; When I look back upon it, all
+is quiet and good order: the darkest cloud of the smuggling had
+passed over, at least from my people, and the rumours of
+rebellion in America were but like the distant sound of the bars
+of Ayr.&nbsp; We sat, as it were, in a lown and pleasant place,
+beholding our prosperity, like the apple-tree adorned with her
+garlands of flourishes, in the first fair mornings of the spring,
+when the birds were returning thanks to their Maker for the
+coming again of the seed-time, and the busy bee goeth forth from
+her cell, to gather honey from the flowers of the field, and the
+broom of the hill, and the blue-bells and gowans, which Nature,
+with a gracious and a gentle hand, scatters in the valley, as she
+walketh forth in her beauty, to testify to the goodness of the
+Father of all mercies.</p>
+<p>Both at the spring and the harvest sacraments, the weather was
+as that which is in Paradise; there was a glad composure in all
+hearts, and the minds of men were softened towards each
+other.&nbsp; The number of communicants was greater than had been
+known for many years, and the tables were filled by the pious
+from many a neighbouring parish: those of my hearers who had
+opposed my placing, declared openly, for a testimony of
+satisfaction and holy thankfulness, that the tent, so surrounded
+as it was on both occasions, was a sight they never had expected
+to see.&nbsp; I was, to be sure, assisted by some of the best
+divines then in the land, but I had not been a sluggard myself in
+the vineyard.</p>
+<p>Often, when I think on this year, so fruitful in pleasant
+intimacies, has the thought come into my mind, that as the Lord
+blesses the earth from time to time with a harvest of more than
+the usual increase, so, in like manner, he is sometimes for a
+season pleased to pour into the breasts of mankind a larger
+portion of good-will and charity, disposing them to love one
+another, to be kindly to all creatures, and filled with the
+delight of thankfulness to himself, which is the greatest of
+blessings.</p>
+<p>It was in this year that the Earl of Eaglesham ordered the
+fair to be established in the village; and it was a day of
+wonderful festivity to all the bairns, and lads and lassies, for
+miles round.&nbsp; I think, indeed, that there has never been
+such a fair as the first since; for although we have more
+mountebanks and merry-andrews now, and richer cargoes of
+groceries and packman&rsquo;s stands, yet there has been a
+falling off in the light-hearted daffing, while the hobleshows in
+the change-houses have been awfully augmented.&nbsp; It was on
+this occasion that Punch&rsquo;s opera was first seen in our
+country side, and surely never was there such a funny curiosity;
+for although Mr. Punch himself was but a timber idol, he was as
+droll as a true living thing, and napped with his head so
+comical; but oh! he was a sorrowful contumacious captain, and it
+was just a sport to see how he rampaged, and triumphed, and
+sang.&nbsp; For months after, the laddie weans did nothing but
+squeak and sing like Punch.&nbsp; In short, a blithe spirit was
+among us throughout this year, and the briefness of the chronicle
+bears witness to the innocency of the time.</p>
+<h2><a name="page81"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+81</span>CHAPTER XII<br />
+YEAR 1771</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> was in this year that my
+troubles with Lady Macadam&rsquo;s affair began.&nbsp; She was a
+woman, as I have by hint here and there intimated, of a prelatic
+disposition, seeking all things her own way, and not overly
+scrupulous about the means, which I take to be the true humour of
+prelacy.&nbsp; She was come of a high episcopal race in the east
+country, where sound doctrine had been long but little heard, and
+she considered the comely humility of a presbyter as the
+wickedness of hypocrisy; so that, saving in the way of
+neighbourly visitation, there was no sincere communion between
+us.&nbsp; Nevertheless, with all her vagaries, she had the
+element of a kindly spirit, that would sometimes kythe in actions
+of charity, that showed symptoms of a true Christian grace, had
+it been properly cultivated; but her morals had been greatly
+neglected in her youth, and she would waste her precious time in
+the long winter nights, playing at the cards with her visitors;
+in the which thriftless and sinful pastime, she was at great
+pains to instruct Kate Malcolm, which I was grieved to
+understand.&nbsp; What, however, I most misliked in her ladyship,
+was a lightness and juvenility of behaviour altogether unbecoming
+her years; for she was far past three-score, having been long
+married without children.&nbsp; Her son, the soldier officer,
+came so late, that it was thought she would have been taken up as
+an evidence in the Douglas cause.&nbsp; She was, to be sure,
+crippled with the rheumatics, and no doubt the time hung heavy on
+her hands; but the best friends of recreation and sport must
+allow, that an old woman, sitting whole hours jingling with that
+paralytic chattel a spinnet, was not a natural object!&nbsp;
+What, then, could be said for her singing Italian songs, and
+getting all the newest from Vauxhall in London, a boxful at a
+time, with new novel-books, and trinkum-trankum flowers and
+feathers, and sweetmeats, sent to her by a lady of the blood
+royal of Paris?&nbsp; As for the music, she was at great pains to
+instruct Kate, which, with the other things she taught, were
+sufficient, as my lady said herself, to qualify poor Kate for a
+duchess or a governess, in either of which capacities, her
+ladyship assured Mrs. Malcolm, she would do honour to her
+instructor, meaning her own self; but I must come to the point
+anent the affair.</p>
+<p>One evening, early in the month of January, as I was sitting
+by myself in my closet studying the <i>Scots Magazine</i>, which
+I well remember the new number had come but that very night, Mrs.
+Balwhidder being at the time busy with the lasses in the kitchen,
+and superintending, as her custom was, for she was a clever
+woman, a great wool-spinning we then had, both little wheel and
+meikle wheel, for stockings and blankets&mdash;sitting, as I was
+saying, in the study, with the fire well gathered up, for a
+night&rsquo;s reflection, a prodigious knocking came to the door,
+by which the book was almost startled out of my hand, and all the
+wheels in the house were silenced at once.&nbsp; This was her
+ladyship&rsquo;s flunkey, to beg me to go to her, whom he
+described as in a state of desperation.&nbsp; Christianity
+required that I should obey the summons; so, with what haste I
+could, thinking that perhaps, as she had been low-spirited for
+some time about the young laird&rsquo;s going to the Indies, she
+might have got a cast of grace, and been wakened in despair to
+the state of darkness in which she had so long lived, I made as
+few steps of the road between the manse and her house as it was
+in my ability to do.</p>
+<p>On reaching the door, I found a great light in the
+house&mdash;candles burning up stairs and down stairs, and a
+sough of something extraordinar going on.&nbsp; I went into the
+dining-room, where her ladyship was wont to sit; but she was not
+there&mdash;only Kate Malcolm all alone, busily picking bits of
+paper from the carpet.&nbsp; When she looked up, I saw that her
+eyes were red with weeping, and I was alarmed, and said,
+&ldquo;Katy, my dear, I hope there is no danger?&rdquo;&nbsp;
+Upon which the poor lassie rose, and, flinging herself in a
+chair, covered her face with her hands, and wept bitterly.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;What is the old fool doing with the wench?&rdquo; cried
+a sharp angry voice from the drawing-room&mdash;&ldquo;why does
+not he come to me?&rdquo;&nbsp; It was the voice of Lady Macadam
+herself, and she meant me.&nbsp; So I went to her; but, oh! she
+was in a far different state from what I had hoped.&nbsp; The
+pride of this world had got the upper hand of her, and was
+playing dreadful antics with understanding.&nbsp; There was she,
+painted like a Jezebel, with gum-flowers on her head, as was her
+custom every afternoon, sitting on a settee, for she was lame,
+and in her hand she held a letter.&nbsp; &ldquo;Sir,&rdquo; said
+she, as I came into the room, &ldquo;I want you to go instantly
+to that young fellow, your clerk, (meaning Mr. Lorimore, the
+schoolmaster, who was likewise session-clerk and precentor,) and
+tell him I will give him a couple of hundred pounds to marry Miss
+Malcolm without delay, and undertake to procure him a living from
+some of my friends.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Softly, my lady, you must first tell me the meaning of
+all this haste of kindness,&rdquo; said I, in my calm methodical
+manner.&nbsp; At the which she began to cry and sob, like a
+petted bairn, and to bewail her ruin, and the dishonour of her
+family.&nbsp; I was surprised, and beginning to be confounded; at
+length out it came.&nbsp; The flunkey had that night brought two
+London letters from the Irville post, and Kate Malcolm being out
+of the way when he came home, he took them both in to her
+ladyship on the silver server, as was his custom; and her
+ladyship, not jealousing that Kate could have a correspondence
+with London, thought both the letters were for herself, for they
+were franked; so, as it happened, she opened the one that was for
+Kate, and this, too, from the young laird, her own son.&nbsp; She
+could not believe her eyes when she saw the first words in his
+hand of write; and she read, and she better read, till she read
+all the letter, by which she came to know that Kate and her
+darling were trysted, and that this was not the first love-letter
+which had passed between them.&nbsp; She, therefore, tore it in
+pieces, and sent for me, and screamed for Kate; in short, went,
+as it were, off at the head, and was neither to bind nor to hold
+on account of this intrigue, as she, in her wrath, stigmatised
+the innocent gallanting of poor Kate and the young laird.</p>
+<p>I listened in patience to all she had to say anent the
+discovery, and offered her the very best advice; but she derided
+my judgment; and because I would not speak outright to Mr.
+Lorimore, and get him to marry Kate off hand, she bade me
+good-night with an air, and sent for him herself.&nbsp; He,
+however, was on the brink of marriage with his present worthy
+helpmate, and declined her ladyship&rsquo;s proposals, which
+angered her still more.&nbsp; But although there was surely a
+great lack of discretion in all this, and her ladyship was
+entirely overcome with her passion, she would not part with Kate,
+nor allow her to quit the house with me, but made her sup with
+her as usual that night, calling her sometimes a perfidious
+baggage, and at other times, forgetting her delirium, speaking to
+her as kindly as ever.&nbsp; At night, Kate as usual helped her
+ladyship into her bed, (this she told me with tears in her eyes
+next morning;) and when Lady Macadam, as was her wont, bent to
+kiss her for good-night, she suddenly recollected &ldquo;the
+intrigue,&rdquo; and gave Kate such a slap on the side of the
+head, as quite dislocated for a time the intellects of the poor
+young lassie.&nbsp; Next morning, Kate was solemnly advised never
+to write again to the laird, while the lady wrote him a letter,
+which, she said, would be as good as a birch to the breech of the
+boy.&nbsp; Nothing, therefore, for some time, indeed, throughout
+the year, came of the matter; but her ladyship, when Mrs.
+Balwhidder soon after called on her, said that I was a
+nose-of-wax, and that she never would speak to me again, which
+surely was not a polite thing to say to Mrs. Balwhidder, my
+second wife.</p>
+<p>This stramash was the first time I had interposed in the
+family concerns of my people; for it was against my nature to
+make or meddle with private actions saving only such as in course
+of nature came before the session; but I was not satisfied with
+the principles of Lady Macadam, and I began to be weary about
+Kate Malcolm&rsquo;s situation with her ladyship, whose ways of
+thinking I saw were not to be depended on, especially in those
+things wherein her pride and vanity were concerned.&nbsp; But the
+time ran on&mdash;the butterflies and the blossoms were succeeded
+by the leaves and the fruit, and nothing of a particular nature
+farther molested the general tranquillity of this year; about the
+end of which, there came on a sudden frost, after a tack of wet
+weather.&nbsp; The roads were just a sheet of ice, like a frozen
+river; insomuch that the coal-carts could not work; and one of
+our cows, (Mrs. Balwhidder said, after the accident, it was our
+best; but it was not so much thought of before,) fell in coming
+from the glebe to the byre, and broke its two hinder legs, which
+obligated us to kill it, in order to put the beast out of
+pain.&nbsp; As this happened after we had salted our mart, it
+occasioned us to have a double crop of puddings, and such a show
+of hams in the kitchen, as was a marvel to our visitors to
+see.</p>
+<h2><a name="page88"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+88</span>CHAPTER XIII<br />
+YEAR 1772</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">On</span> New-Year&rsquo;s night, this
+year, a thing happened, which, in its own nature, was a trifle;
+but it turned out as a mustard-seed that grows into a great
+tree.&nbsp; One of the elders, who has long been dead and gone,
+came to the manse about a fact that was found out in the clachan,
+and after we had discoursed on it some time, he rose to take his
+departure.&nbsp; I went with him to the door with the candle in
+my hand&mdash;it was a clear frosty night, with a sharp wind; and
+the moment I opened the door, the blast blew out the candle, so
+that I heedlessly, with the candlestick in my hand, walked with
+him to the yett without my hat, by which I took a sore cold in my
+head, that brought on a dreadful toothache; insomuch, that I was
+obligated to go into Irville to get the tooth drawn, and this
+caused my face to swell to such a fright, that, on the
+Sabbath-day, I could not preach to my people.&nbsp; There was,
+however, at that time, a young man, one Mr. Heckletext, tutor in
+Sir Hugh Montgomerie&rsquo;s family, and who had shortly before
+been licensed.&nbsp; Finding that I would not be able to preach
+myself, I sent to him, and begged he would officiate for me,
+which he very pleasantly consented to do, being, like all the
+young clergy, thirsting to show his light to the world.&nbsp;
+&rsquo;Twixt the fore and afternoon&rsquo;s worship, he took his
+check of dinner at the manse, and I could not but say that he
+seemed both discreet and sincere.&nbsp; Judge, however, what was
+brewing, when the same night Mr. Lorimore came and told me, that
+Mr. Heckletext was the suspected person anent the fact that had
+been instrumental, in the hand of a chastising Providence, to
+afflict me with the toothache, in order, as it afterwards came to
+pass, to bring the hidden hypocrisy of the ungodly preacher to
+light.&nbsp; It seems that the donsie lassie who was in fault,
+had gone to the kirk in the afternoon, and seeing who was in the
+pulpit, where she expected to see me, was seized with the
+hysterics, and taken with her crying on the spot, the which being
+untimely, proved the death of both mother and bairn, before the
+thing was properly laid to the father&rsquo;s charge.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p88b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Precentor"
+title=
+"The Precentor"
+ src="images/p88s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>This caused a great uproar in the parish.&nbsp; I was sorely
+blamed to let such a man as Mr. Heckletext go up into my pulpit,
+although I was as ignorant of his offences as the innocent child
+that perished; and, in an unguarded hour, to pacify some of the
+elders, who were just distracted about the disgrace, I consented
+to have him called before the session.&nbsp; He obeyed the call,
+and in a manner that I will never forget; for he was a sorrow of
+sin and audacity, and demanded to know why, and for what reason,
+he was summoned.&nbsp; I told him the whole affair in my calm and
+moderate way; but it was oil cast upon a burning coal.&nbsp; He
+flamed up in a terrible passion; threepit at the elders that they
+had no proof whatever of his having had any trafficking in the
+business, which was the case; for it was only a notion, the poor
+deceased lassie never having made a disclosure: called them
+libellous conspirators against his character, which was his only
+fortune, and concluded by threatening to punish them, though he
+exempted me from the injury which their slanderous insinuations
+had done to his prospects in life.&nbsp; We were all terrified,
+and allowed him to go away without uttering a word; and sure
+enough he did bring a plea in the courts of Edinburgh against Mr.
+Lorimore and the elders for damages, laid at a great sum.</p>
+<p>What might have been the consequence, no one can tell; but
+soon after he married Sir Hugh&rsquo;s house-keeper, and went
+with her into Edinburgh, where he took up a school; and, before
+the trial came on, that is to say, within three months of the day
+that I myself married them, Mrs. Heckletext was delivered of a
+thriving lad bairn, which would have been a witness for the
+elders, had the worst come to the worst.&nbsp; This was, indeed,
+we all thought, a joyous deliverance to the parish, and it was a
+lesson to me never to allow any preacher to mount my pulpit,
+unless I knew something of his moral character.</p>
+<p>In other respects, this year passed very peaceably in the
+parish: there was a visible increase of worldly circumstances,
+and the hedges which had been planted along the toll-road, began
+to put forth their branches, and to give new notions of
+orderlyness and beauty to the farmers.&nbsp; Mrs. Malcolm heard
+from time to time from her son Charles, on board the man-of-war
+the <i>Avenger</i>, where he was midshipman; and he had found a
+friend in the captain, that was just a father to him.&nbsp; Her
+second son, Robert, being out of his time at Irville, went to the
+Clyde to look for a berth, and was hired to go to Jamaica, in a
+ship called the <i>Trooper</i>.&nbsp; He was a lad of greater
+sobriety of nature than Charles; douce, honest, and faithful; and
+when he came home, though he brought no limes to me to make
+punch, like his brother, he brought a Muscovy duck to Lady
+Macadam, who had, as I have related, in a manner educated his
+sister Kate.&nbsp; That duck was the first of the kind we had
+ever seen, and many thought it was of the goose species, only
+with short bowly legs.&nbsp; It was, however, a tractable and
+homely beast; and after some confabulation, as my lady herself
+told Mrs. Balwhidder, it was received into fellowship by her
+other ducks and poultry.&nbsp; It is not, however, so much on
+account of the rarity of the creature, that I have introduced it
+here, as for the purpose of relating a wonderful operation that
+was performed on it by Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress.</p>
+<p>There happened to be a sack of beans in our stable, and Lady
+Macadam&rsquo;s hens and fowls, which were not overly fed at home
+through the inattention of her servants, being great stravaigers
+for their meat, in passing the door went in to pick, and the
+Muscovy, seeing a hole in the bean-sack, dabbled out a crapful
+before she was disturbed.&nbsp; The beans swelled on the poor
+bird&rsquo;s stomach, and her crap bellied out like the kyte of a
+Glasgow magistrate, until it was just a sight to be seen with its
+head back on its shoulders.&nbsp; The bairns of the clachan
+followed it up and down, crying, the lady&rsquo;s muckle
+jock&rsquo;s aye growing bigger, till every heart was wae for the
+creature.&nbsp; Some thought it was afflicted with a tympathy,
+and others, that it was the natural way for such-like ducks to
+cleck their young.&nbsp; In short, we were all concerned; and my
+lady, having a great opinion of Miss Sabrina&rsquo;s skill, had a
+consultation with her on the case, at which Miss Sabrina advised,
+that what she called the C&aelig;sarean operation should be
+tried, which she herself performed accordingly, by opening the
+creature&rsquo;s crap, and taking out as many beans as filled a
+mutchkin stoup, after which she sewed it up, and the Muscovy went
+its way to the water-side, and began to swim, and was as jocund
+as ever; insomuch, that in three days after it was quite cured of
+all the consequences of its surfeit.</p>
+<p>I had at one time a notion to send an account of this to the
+<i>Scots Magazine</i>, but something always came in the way to
+prevent me; so that it has been reserved for a place in this
+chronicle, being, after Mr. Heckletext&rsquo;s affair, the most
+memorable thing in our history of this year.</p>
+<h2><a name="page94"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+94</span>CHAPTER XIV<br />
+YEAR 1773</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">In</span> this Ann. Dom. there was
+something like a plea getting to a head, between the session and
+some of the heritors, about a new school-house; the thatch having
+been torn from the rigging of the old one by a blast of wind, on
+the first Monday of February, by which a great snow storm got
+admission, and the school was rendered utterly
+uninhabitable.&nbsp; The smaller sort of lairds were very willing
+to come into the plan with an extra contribution, because they
+respected the master, and their bairns were at the school; but
+the gentlemen, who had tutors in their own houses, were not so
+manageable; and some of them even went so far as to say, that the
+kirk, being only wanted on Sunday, would do very well for a
+school all the rest of the week, which was a very profane way of
+speaking; and I was resolved to set myself against any such
+thing, and to labour, according to the power and efficacy of my
+station, to get a new school built.</p>
+<p>Many a meeting the session had on the subject; and the
+heritors debated, and discussed, and revised their proceedings,
+and still no money for the needful work was forthcoming.&nbsp;
+Whereupon it happened one morning, as I was rummaging in my
+scrutoire, that I laid my hand on the Lord Eaglesham&rsquo;s
+letter anent Charles Malcolm; and it was put into my head at that
+moment, that if I was to write to his lordship, who was the
+greatest heritor, and owned now the major part of the parish,
+that by his help and influence I might be an instrument to the
+building of a comfortable new school.&nbsp; Accordingly, I sat
+down and wrote my lord all about the accident, and the state of
+the school-house, and the divisions and seditions among the
+heritors, and sent the letter to him at London by the post the
+same day, without saying a word to any living soul on the
+subject.</p>
+<p>This in me was an advised thought; for, by the return of post,
+his lordship with his own hand, in a most kind manner, authorized
+me to say that he would build a new school at his own cost, and
+bade me go over and consult about it with his steward at the
+castle, to whom he had written by the same post the necessary
+instructions.&nbsp; Nothing could exceed the gladness which the
+news gave to the whole parish, and none said more in behalf of
+his lordship&rsquo;s bounty and liberality than the heritors;
+especially those gentry who grudged the undertaking, when it was
+thought that it would have to come out of their own
+pock-nook.</p>
+<p>In the course of the summer, just as the roof was closing in
+of the school-house, my lord came to the castle with a great
+company, and was not there a day till he sent for me to come
+over, on the next Sunday, to dine with him; but I sent him word
+that I could not do so, for it would be a transgression of the
+Sabbath, which made him send his own gentleman, to make his
+apology for having taken so great a liberty with me, and to beg
+me to come on the Monday, which I accordingly did, and nothing
+could be better than the discretion with which I was used.&nbsp;
+There was a vast company of English ladies and gentlemen, and his
+lordship, in a most jocose manner, told them all how he had
+fallen on the midden, and how I had clad him in my clothes, and
+there was a wonder of laughing and diversion; but the most
+particular thing in the company, was a large, round-faced man,
+with a wig, that was a dignitary in some great Episcopalian
+church in London, who was extraordinary condescending towards me,
+drinking wine with me at the table, and saying weighty sentences,
+in a fine style of language, about the becoming grace of
+simplicity and innocence of heart, in the clergy of all
+denominations of Christians, which I was pleased to hear; for
+really he had a proud red countenance, and I could not have
+thought he was so mortified to humility within, had I not heard
+with what sincerity he delivered himself, and seen how much
+reverence and attention was paid to him by all present,
+particularly by my lord&rsquo;s chaplain, who was a pious and
+pleasant young divine, though educated at Oxford for the
+Episcopalian persuasion.</p>
+<p>One day, soon after, as I was sitting in my closet conning a
+sermon for the next Sunday, I was surprised by a visit from the
+dean, as the dignitary was called.&nbsp; He had come, he said, to
+wait on me as rector of the parish&mdash;for so, it seems, they
+call a pastor in England&mdash;and to say, that, if it was
+agreeable, he would take a family dinner with us before he left
+the castle.&nbsp; I could make no objection to this kindness; but
+said I hoped my lord would come with him, and that we would do
+our best to entertain them with all suitable hospitality.&nbsp;
+About an hour or so after he had returned to the castle, one of
+the flunkeys brought a letter from his lordship, to say, that not
+only he would come with the dean, but that they would bring his
+other guests with them; and that, as they could only drink London
+wine, the butler would send me a hamper in the morning, assured,
+as he was pleased to say, that Mrs. Balwhidder would otherwise
+provide good cheer.</p>
+<p>This notification, however, was a great trouble to my wife,
+who was only used to manufacture the produce of our glebe and
+yard to a profitable purpose, and not used to the treatment of
+deans and lords, and other persons of quality.&nbsp; However, she
+was determined to stretch a point on this occasion; and we had,
+as all present declared, a charming dinner; for fortunately one
+of the sows had a litter of pigs a few days before, and in
+addition to a goose, that is but a boss bird, we had a roasted
+pig with an apple in its mouth, which was just a curiosity to
+see; and my lord called it a tithe pig; but I told him it was one
+of Mrs. Balwhidder&rsquo;s own clecking, which saying of mine
+made no little sport when expounded to the dean.</p>
+<p>But, och how! this was the last happy summer that we had for
+many a year in the parish; and an omen of the dule that ensued,
+was in a sacrilegious theft that a daft woman, Jenny Gaffaw, and
+her idiot daughter, did in the kirk, by tearing off and stealing
+the green serge lining of my lord&rsquo;s pew, to make, as they
+said, a hap for their shoulders in the cold weather&mdash;saving,
+however, the sin, we paid no attention at the time to the
+mischief and tribulation that so unheard-of a trespass boded to
+us all.&nbsp; It took place about Yule, when the weather was cold
+and frosty, and poor Jenny was not very able to go about seeking
+her meat as usual.&nbsp; The deed, however, was mainly done by
+her daughter, who, when brought before me, said, &ldquo;her poor
+mother&rsquo;s back had mair need of claes than the
+kirk-boards;&rdquo; which was so true a thing, that I could not
+punish her, but wrote anent it to my lord, who not only
+overlooked the offence, but sent orders to the servants at the
+castle to be kind to the poor woman, and the natural, her
+daughter.</p>
+<h2><a name="page99"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+99</span>CHAPTER XV<br />
+YEAR 1774</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> I look back on this year, and
+compare what happened therein with the things that had gone
+before, I am grieved to the heart, and pressed down with an
+afflicted spirit.&nbsp; We had, as may be read, trials and
+tribulations in the days that were past; and in the rank and
+boisterous times of the smuggling there was much sin and blemish
+among us, but nothing so dark and awful as what fell out in the
+course of this unhappy year.&nbsp; The evil omen of daft Jenny
+Gaffaw and her daughter&rsquo;s sacrilege, had soon a bloody
+verification.</p>
+<p>About the beginning of the month of March in this year, the
+war in America was kindling so fast that the government was
+obligated to send soldiers over the sea, in the hope to quell the
+rebellious temper of the plantations; and a party of a regiment
+that was quartered at Ayr was ordered to march to Greenock, to be
+there shipped off.&nbsp; The men were wild and wicked
+profligates, without the fear of the Lord before their eyes; and
+some of them had drawn up with light women in Ayr, who followed
+them on their march.&nbsp; This the soldiers did not like, not
+wishing to be troubled with such gear in America; so the women,
+when they got the length of Kilmarnock, were ordered to retreat
+and go home, which they all did but one Jean Glaikit, who
+persisted in her intent to follow her joe, Patrick O&rsquo;Neil,
+a Catholic Irish corporal.&nbsp; The man did, as he said, all in
+his capacity to persuade her to return, but she was a
+contumacious limmer, and would not listen to reason; so that, in
+passing along our toll-road, from less to more, the miserable
+wretches fell out, and fought, and the soldier put an end to her
+with a hasty knock on the head with his firelock, and marched on
+after his comrades.</p>
+<p>The body of the woman was, about half an hour after, found by
+the scholars of Mr. Lorimore&rsquo;s school, who had got the play
+to see the marching, and to hear the drums of the soldiers.&nbsp;
+Dreadful was the shout and the cry throughout the parish at this
+foul work.&nbsp; Some of the farmer lads followed the soldiers on
+horseback, and others ran to Sir Hugh, who was a justice of the
+peace, for his advice.&mdash;Such a day as that was!</p>
+<p>However, the murderer was taken, and, with his arms tied
+behind him with a cord, he was brought back to the parish, where
+he confessed before Sir Hugh the deed, and how it happened.&nbsp;
+He was then put in a cart, and, being well guarded by six of the
+lads, was taken to Ayr jail.</p>
+<p>It was not long after this that the murderer was brought to
+trial, and, being found guilty on his own confession, he was
+sentenced to be executed, and his body to be hung in chains near
+the spot where the deed was done.&nbsp; I thought that all in the
+parish would have run to desperation with horror when the news of
+this came, and I wrote immediately to the Lord Eaglesham to get
+this done away by the merciful power of the government, which he
+did, to our great solace and relief.</p>
+<p>In the autumn, the young Laird Macadam, being ordered with his
+regiment for the Americas, got leave from the king to come and
+see his lady mother, before his departure.&nbsp; But it was not
+to see her only, as will presently appear.</p>
+<p>Knowing how much her ladyship was averse to the notion he had
+of Kate Malcolm, he did not write of his coming, lest she would
+send Kate out of the way, but came in upon them at a late hour,
+as they were wasting their precious time, as was the nightly wont
+of my lady, with a pack of cards; and so far was she from being
+pleased to see him, that no sooner did she behold his face, but,
+like a tap of tow, she kindled upon both him and Kate, and
+ordered them out of her sight and house.&nbsp; The young folk had
+discretion: Kate went home to her mother, and the laird came to
+the manse, and begged us to take him in.&nbsp; He then told me
+what had happened; and that, having bought a captain&rsquo;s
+commission, he was resolved to marry Kate, and hoped I would
+perform the ceremony, if her mother would consent.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;As for mine,&rdquo; said he, &ldquo;she will never agree;
+but, when the thing is done, her pardon will not be difficult to
+get; for, with all her whims and caprice, she is generous and
+affectionate.&rdquo;&nbsp; In short, he so wiled and beguiled me,
+that I consented to marry them, if Mrs. Malcolm was
+agreeable.&nbsp; &ldquo;I will not disobey my mother,&rdquo; said
+he, &ldquo;by asking her consent, which I know she will refuse;
+and, therefore, the sooner it is done the better.&rdquo;&nbsp; So
+we then stepped over to Mrs. Malcolm&rsquo;s house, where we
+found that saintly woman, with Kate and Effie, and Willie,
+sitting peacefully at their fireside, preparing to read their
+Bibles for the night.&nbsp; When we went in, and when I saw Kate,
+that was so ladylike there, with the decent humility of her
+parent&rsquo;s dwelling, I could not but think she was destined
+for a better station; and when I looked at the captain, a
+handsome youth, I thought surely their marriage is made in
+heaven; and so I said to Mrs. Malcolm, who after a time
+consented, and likewise agreed that her daughter should go with
+the captain to America; for her faith and trust in the goodness
+of Providence was great and boundless, striving, as it were, to
+be even with its tender mercies.&nbsp; Accordingly, the
+captain&rsquo;s man was sent to bid the chaise wait that had
+taken him to the lady&rsquo;s, and the marriage was sanctified by
+me before we left Mrs. Malcolm&rsquo;s.&nbsp; No doubt, they
+ought to have been proclaimed three several Sabbaths; but I
+satisfied the session, at our first meeting, on account of the
+necessity of the case.&nbsp; The young couple went in the chaise
+travelling to Glasgow, authorising me to break the matter to Lady
+Macadam, which was a sore task; but I was spared from the
+performance.&nbsp; For her ladyship had come to herself, and
+thinking on her own rashness in sending away Kate and the captain
+in the way she had done, she was like one by herself.&nbsp; All
+the servants were scattered out and abroad in quest of the
+lovers; and some of them, seeing the chaise drive from Mrs.
+Malcolm&rsquo;s door with them in it, and me coming out,
+jealoused what had been done, and told their mistress outright of
+the marriage, which was to her like a clap of thunder; insomuch
+that she flung herself back in her settee, and was beating and
+drumming with her heels on the floor, like a madwoman in Bedlam,
+when I entered the room.&nbsp; For some time she took no notice
+of me, but continued her din; but, by-and-by, she began to turn
+her eyes in fiery glances upon me, till I was terrified lest she
+would fly at me with her claws in her fury.&nbsp; At last she
+stopped all at once, and in a calm voice, said, &ldquo;But it
+cannot now be helped, where are the
+vagabonds?&rdquo;&mdash;&ldquo;They are gone,&rdquo; replied
+I.&mdash;&ldquo;Gone?&rdquo; cried she, &ldquo;gone
+where?&rdquo;&mdash;&ldquo;To America, I suppose,&rdquo; was my
+answer; upon which she again threw herself back in the settee,
+and began again to drum and beat with her feet as before.&nbsp;
+But not to dwell on small particularities, let it suffice to say,
+that she sent her coachman on one of her coach horses, which,
+being old and stiff, did not overtake the fugitives till they
+were in their bed at Kilmarnock, where they stopped that night;
+but when they came back to the lady&rsquo;s in the morning, she
+was as cagey and meikle taken up with them, as if they had gotten
+her full consent and privilege to marry from the first.&nbsp;
+Thus was the first of Mrs. Malcolm&rsquo;s children well and
+creditably settled.&nbsp; I have only now to conclude with
+observing, that my son Gilbert was seized with the smallpox about
+the beginning of December, and was blinded by them for seventeen
+days; for the inoculation was not in practice yet among us,
+saving only in the genteel families that went into Edinburgh for
+the education of their children, where it was performed by the
+faculty there.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p104b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"Kate"
+title=
+"Kate"
+ src="images/p104s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<h2><a name="page105"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+105</span>CHAPTER XVI<br />
+YEAR 1775</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> regular course of nature is
+calm and orderly, and tempests and troubles are but lapses from
+the accustomed sobriety with which Providence works out the
+destined end of all things.&nbsp; From Yule till Pace-Monday
+there had been a gradual subsidence of our personal and parochial
+tribulations, and the spring, though late, set in bright and
+beautiful, and was accompanied with the spirit of contentment; so
+that, excepting the great concern that we all began to take in
+the American rebellion, especially on account of Charles Malcolm
+that was in the man-of-war, and of Captain Macadam that had
+married Kate, we had throughout the better half of the year but
+little molestation of any sort.&nbsp; I should, however, note the
+upshot of the marriage.</p>
+<p>By some cause that I do not recollect, if I ever had it
+properly told, the regiment wherein the captain had bought his
+commission was not sent to the plantations, but only over to
+Ireland, by which the captain and his lady were allowed to
+prolong their stay in the parish with his mother; and he, coming
+of age while he was among us, in making a settlement on his wife,
+bought the house at the Braehead, which was then just built by
+Thomas Shivers the mason, and he gave that house, with a
+judicious income, to Mrs. Malcolm, telling her that it was not
+becoming, he having it in his power to do the contrary, that she
+should any longer be dependent on her own industry.&nbsp; For
+this the young man got a name like a sweet odour in all the
+country side; but that whimsical and prelatic lady his mother,
+just went out of all bounds, and played such pranks for an old
+woman, as cannot be told.&nbsp; To her daughter-in-law, however,
+she was wonderful kind; and, in fitting her out for going with
+the captain to Dublin, it was extraordinary to hear what a
+paraphernalia she provided her with.&nbsp; But who could have
+thought that in this kindness a sore trial was brewing for
+me!</p>
+<p>It happened that Miss Betty Wudrife, the daughter of an
+heritor, had been on a visit to some of her friends in Edinburgh;
+and being in at Edinburgh, she came out with a fine mantle,
+decked and adorned with many a ribbon-knot, such as had never
+been seen in the parish.&nbsp; The Lady Macadam, hearing of this
+grand mantle, sent to beg Miss Betty to lend it to her, to make a
+copy for young Mrs. Macadam.&nbsp; But Miss Betty was so vogie
+with her gay mantle, that she sent back word, it would be making
+it o&rsquo;er common; which so nettled the old courtly lady, that
+she vowed revenge, and said the mantle would not be long seen on
+Miss Betty.&nbsp; Nobody knew the meaning of her words; but she
+sent privately for Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress, who was aye
+proud of being invited to my lady&rsquo;s, where she went on the
+Sabbath night to drink tea, and read Thomson&rsquo;s
+<i>Seasons</i> and Hervey&rsquo;s <i>Meditations</i> for her
+ladyship&rsquo;s recreation.&nbsp; Between the two, a secret plot
+was laid against Miss Betty and her Edinburgh mantle; and Miss
+Sabrina, in a very treacherous manner, for the which I afterwards
+chided her severely, went to Miss Betty, and got a sight of the
+mantle, and how it was made, and all about it, until she was in a
+capacity to make another like it; by which my lady and her, from
+old silk and satin neglig&eacute;es which her ladyship had worn
+at the French court, made up two mantles of the selfsame fashion
+as Miss Betty&rsquo;s, and, if possible, more sumptuously
+garnished, but in a flagrant fool way.&nbsp; On the Sunday
+morning after, her ladyship sent for Jenny Gaffaw, and her daft
+daughter Meg, and showed them the mantles, and said she would
+give then half-a-crown if they would go with them to the kirk,
+and take their place in the bench beside the elders, and, after
+worship, walk home before Miss Betty Wudrife.&nbsp; The two poor
+natural things were just transported with the sight of such
+bravery, and needed no other bribe; so, over their bits of ragged
+duds, they put on the pageantry, and walked away to the kirk like
+peacocks, and took their place on the bench, to the great
+diversion of the whole congregation.</p>
+<p>I had no suspicion of this, and had prepared an affecting
+discourse about the horrors of war, in which I touched, with a
+tender hand, on the troubles that threatened families and kindred
+in America; but all the time I was preaching, doing my best, and
+expatiating till the tears came into my eyes, I could not divine
+what was the cause of the inattention of my people.&nbsp; But the
+two vain haverels were on the bench under me, and I could not see
+them; where they sat, spreading their feathers and picking their
+wings, stroking down and setting right their finery; with such an
+air as no living soul could see and withstand; while every eye in
+the kirk was now on them, and now at Miss Betty Wudrife, who was
+in a worse situation than if she had been on the stool of
+repentance.</p>
+<p>Greatly grieved with the little heed that was paid to my
+discourse, I left the pulpit with a heavy heart; but when I came
+out into the kirkyard, and saw the two antics linking like
+ladies, and aye keeping in the way before Miss Betty, and looking
+back and around in their pride and admiration, with high heads
+and a wonderful pomp, I was really overcome, and could not keep
+my gravity, but laughed loud out among the graves, and in the
+face of all my people; who, seeing how I was vanquished in that
+unguarded moment by my enemy, made a universal and most
+unreverent breach of all decorum, at which Miss Betty, who had
+been the cause of all, ran into the first open door, and almost
+fainted away with mortification.</p>
+<p>This affair was regarded by the elders as a sinful trespass on
+the orderlyness that was needful in the Lord&rsquo;s house; and
+they called on me at the manse that night, and said it would be a
+guilty connivance if I did not rebuke and admonish Lady Macadam
+of the evil of her way; for they had questioned daft Jenny, and
+had got at the bottom of the whole plot and mischief.&nbsp; But
+I, who knew her ladyship&rsquo;s light way, would fain have had
+the elders to overlook it, rather than expose myself to her
+tantrums; but they considered the thing as a great scandal, so I
+was obligated to conform to their wishes.&nbsp; I might, however,
+have as well stayed at home, for her ladyship was in one of her
+jocose humours when I went to speak to her on the subject; and it
+was so far from my power to make a proper impression on her of
+the enormity that had been committed, that she made me laugh, in
+spite of my reason, at the fantastical drollery of her malicious
+prank on Miss Betty Wudrife.</p>
+<p>It, however, did not end here; for the session, knowing that
+it was profitless to speak to the daft mother and daughter, who
+had been the instruments, gave orders to Willy Howking, the
+betheral, not to let them again so far into the kirk; and Willy,
+having scarcely more sense than them both, thought proper to keep
+them out next Sunday altogether.&nbsp; The twa said nothing at
+the time, but the adversary was busy with them; for, on the
+Wednesday following, there being a meeting of the synod at Ayr,
+to my utter amazement the mother and daughter made their
+appearance there in all their finery, and raised a complaint
+against me and the session, for debarring them from church
+privileges.&nbsp; No stage play could have produced such an
+effect.&nbsp; I was perfectly dumfoundered; and every member of
+the synod might have been tied with a straw, they were so
+overcome with this new device of that endless woman, when bent on
+provocation&mdash;the Lady Macadam; in whom the saying was
+verified, that old folk are twice bairns; for in such plays,
+pranks, and projects, she was as playrife as a very lassie at her
+sampler; and this is but a swatch to what lengths she would
+go.&nbsp; The complaint was dismissed, by which the session and
+me were assoilzied; but I&rsquo;ll never forget till the day of
+my death what I suffered on that occasion, to be so put to the
+wall by two born idiots.</p>
+<h2><a name="page111"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+111</span>CHAPTER XVII<br />
+YEAR 1776</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> belongs to the chroniclers of
+the realm to describe the damage and detriment which fell on the
+power and prosperity of the kingdom, by reason of the rebellion,
+that was fired into open war, against the name and authority of
+the king in the plantations of America; for my task is to
+describe what happened within the narrow bound of the pasturage
+of the Lord&rsquo;s flock, of which, in his bounty and mercy, he
+made me the humble, willing, but alas! the weak and ineffectual
+shepherd.</p>
+<p>About the month of February, a recruiting party came to our
+neighbour town of Irville, to beat up for men to be soldiers
+against the rebels; and thus the battle was brought, as it were,
+to our gates; for the very first man that took on with them was
+one Thomas Wilson, a cottar in our clachan, who, up to that time,
+had been a decent and creditable character.&nbsp; He was at first
+a farmer lad, but had forgathered with a doited tawpy, whom he
+married, and had offspring three or four.&nbsp; For some time it
+was noticed that he had a down and thoughtful look, that his
+cleeding was growing bare, and that his wife kept an untrig
+house, which, it was feared by many, was the cause of Thomas
+going o&rsquo;er often to the change-house; he was, in short,
+during the greater part of the winter, evidently a man foregone
+in the pleasures of this world, which made all that knew him
+compassionate his situation.</p>
+<p>No doubt, it was his household ills that burdened him past
+bearing, and made him go into Irville, when he heard of the
+recruiting, and take on to be a soldier.&nbsp; Such a
+wally-wallying as the news of this caused at every door; for the
+red-coats&mdash;from the persecuting days, when the black-cuffs
+rampaged through the country&mdash;soldiers that fought for hire
+were held in dread and as a horror among us, and terrible were
+the stories that were told of their cruelty and sinfulness;
+indeed, there had not been wanting in our time a sample of what
+they were, as witness the murder of Jean Glaikit by Patrick
+O&rsquo;Neil, the Irish corporal, anent which I have treated at
+large in the memorables of the year 1774.</p>
+<p>A meeting of the session was forthwith held; for here was
+Thomas Wilson&rsquo;s wife and all his weans, an awful cess,
+thrown upon the parish; and it was settled outright among us,
+that Mr. Docken, who was then an elder, but is since dead, a
+worthy man, with a soft tongue and a pleasing manner, should go
+to Irville, and get Thomas, if possible, released from the
+recruiters.&nbsp; But it was all in vain; the sergeant would not
+listen to him, for Thomas was a strapping lad; nor would the poor
+infatuated man himself agree to go back, but cursed like a
+cadger, and swore that, if he stayed any longer among his
+plagues, he would commit some rash act; so we were saddled with
+his family, which was the first taste and preeing of what war is
+when it comes into our hearths, and among the breadwinners.</p>
+<p>The evil, however, did not stop here.&nbsp; Thomas, when he
+was dressed out in the king&rsquo;s clothes, came over to see his
+bairns, and take a farewell of his friends, and he looked so
+gallant, that the very next market-day another lad of the parish
+listed with him; but he was a ramplor, roving sort of a creature,
+and, upon the whole, it was thought he did well for the parish
+when he went to serve the king.</p>
+<p>The listing was a catching distemper.&nbsp; Before the summer
+was over, the other three of the farming lads went off with the
+drum, and there was a wailing in the parish, which made me preach
+a touching discourse.&nbsp; I likened the parish to a widow woman
+with a small family, sitting in her cottage by the fireside,
+herself spinning with an eident wheel, ettling her best to get
+them a bit and a brat, and the poor weans all canty about the
+hearthstane&mdash;the little ones at their playocks, and the
+elder at their tasks&mdash;the callans working with hooks and
+lines to catch them a meal of fish in the morning&mdash;and the
+lassies working stockings to sell at the next Marymas
+fair.&mdash;And then I likened war to a calamity coming among
+them&mdash;the callans drowned at their fishing&mdash;the lassies
+led to a misdoing&mdash;and the feckless wee bairns laid on the
+bed of sickness, and their poor forlorn mother sitting by herself
+at the embers of a cauldrife fire; her tow done, and no a bodle
+to buy more; drooping a silent and salt tear for her babies, and
+thinking of days that war gone, and, like Rachel weeping for her
+children, she would not be comforted.&nbsp; With this I
+concluded, for my own heart filled full with the thought, and
+there was a deep sob in the Church; verily it was Rachel weeping
+for her children.</p>
+<p>In the latter end of the year, the man-of-war, with Charles
+Malcolm in her, came to the tail of the Bank at Greenock, to
+press men as it was thought, and Charles got leave from his
+captain to come and see his mother; and he brought with him Mr.
+Howard, another midshipman, the son of a great parliament man in
+London, which, as we have tasted the sorrow, gave us some insight
+into the pomp of war, Charles was now grown up into a fine young
+man, rattling, light-hearted, and just a cordial of gladness, and
+his companion was every bit like him.&nbsp; They were dressed in
+their fine gold-laced garbs and nobody knew Charles when he came
+to the clachan, but all wondered, for they were on horseback, and
+rode to the house where his mother lived when he went away, but
+which was then occupied by Miss Sabrina and her school.&nbsp;
+Miss Sabrina had never seen Charles, but she had heard of him;
+and when he enquired for his mother, she guessed who he was, and
+showed him the way to the new house that the captain had bought
+for her.</p>
+<p>Miss Sabrina, who was a little overly perjink at times,
+behaved herself on this occasion with a true spirit, and gave her
+lassies the play immediately; so that the news of Charles&rsquo;s
+return was spread by them like wildfire, and there was a
+wonderful joy in the whole town.&nbsp; When Charles had seen his
+mother, and his sister Effie, with that douce and well-mannered
+lad William, his brother&mdash;for of their meeting I cannot
+speak, not being present&mdash;he then came with his friend to
+see me at the manse, and was most jocose with me, and, in a way
+of great pleasance, got Mrs. Balwhidder to ask his friend to
+sleep at the manse.&nbsp; In short, we had just a ploy the whole
+two days they stayed with us, and I got leave from Lord
+Eaglesham&rsquo;s steward to let them shoot on my lord&rsquo;s
+land; and I believe every laddie wean in the parish attended them
+to the field.&nbsp; As for old Lady Macadam, Charles being, as
+she said, a near relation, and she having likewise some knowledge
+of his comrade&rsquo;s family, she was just in her element with
+them, though they were but youths; for she a woman naturally of a
+fantastical, and, as I have narrated, given to comical devices,
+and pranks to a degree.&nbsp; She made for them a ball, to which
+she invited all the bonniest lassies, far and near, in the
+parish, and was out of the body with mirth, and had a fiddler
+from Irville; and it was thought by those that were there, that
+had she not been crippled with the rheumatics, she would have
+danced herself.&nbsp; But I was concerned to hear both Charles
+and his friend, like hungry hawks, rejoicing at the prospect of
+the war, hoping thereby, as soon as their midship term was out,
+to be made lieutenants; saving this, there was no allay in the
+happiness they brought with them to the parish, and it was a
+delight to see how auld and young of all degrees made of Charles;
+for we were proud of him, and none more than myself, though he
+began to take liberties with me, calling me old governor; it was,
+however, in a warm-hearted manner, only I did not like it when
+any of the elders heard.&nbsp; As for his mother, she deported
+herself like a saint on the occasion.&nbsp; There was a
+temperance in the pleasure of her heart, and in her thankfulness,
+that is past the compass of words to describe.&nbsp; Even Lady
+Macadam, who never could think a serious thought all her days,
+said, in her wild way that the gods had bestowed more care in the
+making of Mrs. Malcolm&rsquo;s temper, than on the bodies and
+souls of all the saints in the calendar.&nbsp; On the Sunday the
+strangers attended divine worship, and I preached a sermon
+purposely for them, and enlarged at great length and fulness on
+how David overcame Goliath; and they both told me that they had
+never heard such a good discourse; but I do not think they were
+great judges of preachings.&nbsp; How, indeed, could Mr. Howard
+know anything of sound doctrine, being educated, as he told me,
+at Eton school, a prelatic establishment!&nbsp; Nevertheless, he
+was a fine lad; and though a little given to frolic and
+diversion, he had a principle of integrity, that afterwards
+kythed into much virtue; for, during this visit, he took a notion
+of Effie Malcolm, and the lassie of him, then a sprightly and
+blooming creature, fair to look upon, and blithe to see; and he
+kept up a correspondence with her till the war was over, when
+being a captain of a frigate, he came down among us, and they
+were married by me, as shall be related in its proper place.</p>
+<h2><a name="page118"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+118</span>CHAPTER XVIII<br />
+YEAR 1777</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> may well be called the year of
+the heavy heart, for we had sad tidings of the lads that went
+away as soldiers to America.&nbsp; First, there was a boding in
+the minds of all their friends that they were never to see them
+more; and their sadness, like a mist spreading from the waters
+and covering the fields, darkened the spirit of the
+neighbours.&nbsp; Secondly, a sound was bruited about that the
+king&rsquo;s forces would have a hot and a sore struggle before
+the rebels were put down, if they were ever put down.&nbsp; Then
+came the cruel truth of all that the poor lads&rsquo; friends had
+feared.&nbsp; But it is fit and proper that I should relate at
+length, under their several heads, the sorrows and afflictions as
+they came to pass.</p>
+<p>One evening, as I was taking my walk alone, meditating my
+discourse for the next Sabbath&mdash;it was shortly after
+Candlemas&mdash;it was a fine clear frosty evening, just as the
+sun was setting.&nbsp; Taking my walk alone, and thinking of the
+dreadfulness of Almighty power, and how that, if it was not
+tempered and restrained by infinite goodness, and wisdom, and
+mercy, the miserable sinner, man, and all things that live, would
+be in a woeful state, I drew near the beild where old Widow
+Mirkland lived by herself, who was grand-mother to Jock Hempy,
+the ramplor lad, that was the second who took on for a
+soldier.&nbsp; I did mind of this at the time; but, passing the
+house, I heard the croon, as it were, of a laden soul busy with
+the Lord, and, not to disturb the holy workings of grace, I
+paused and listened.&nbsp; It was old Mizy Mirkland herself,
+sitting at the gable of the house, looking at the sun setting in
+all his glory behind the Arran hills; but she was not
+praying&mdash;only moaning to herself&mdash;an oozing out, as it
+might be called, of the spirit from her heart, then grievously
+oppressed with sorrow, and heavy bodements of grey hairs and
+poverty.&mdash;&ldquo;Yonder it slips awa&rsquo;,&rdquo; she was
+saying, &ldquo;and my poor bairn, that&rsquo;s o&rsquo;er the
+seas in America, is maybe looking on its bright face, thinking of
+his hame, and aiblins of me, that did my best to breed him up in
+the fear of the Lord; but I couldna warsle wi&rsquo; what was
+ordained.&nbsp; Ay, Jock! as ye look at the sun gaun down, as
+many a time, when ye were a wee innocent laddie at my knee here,
+I hae bade ye look at him as a type of your Maker, ye will hae a
+sore heart; for ye hae left me in my need, when ye should hae
+been near at hand to help me, for the hard labour and industry
+with which I brought you up.&nbsp; But it&rsquo;s the
+Lord&rsquo;s will.&nbsp; Blessed be the name of the Lord, that
+makes us to thole the tribulations of this world, and will reward
+us, through the mediation of Jesus, hereafter.&rdquo;&nbsp; She
+wept bitterly as she said this, for her heart was tried, but the
+blessing of a religious contentment was shed upon her; and I
+stepped up to her, and asked about her concerns, for, saving as a
+parishioner, and a decent old woman, I knew little of her.&nbsp;
+Brief was her story; but it was one of
+misfortune.&mdash;&ldquo;But I will not complain,&rdquo; she
+said, &ldquo;of the measure that has been meted unto me.&nbsp; I
+was left myself an orphan; when I grew up, and was married to my
+gude-man, I had known but scant and want.&nbsp; Our days of
+felicity were few; and he was ta&rsquo;en awa&rsquo; from me
+shortly after my Mary was born.&nbsp; A wailing baby, and a
+widow&rsquo;s heart, was a&rsquo; he left me.&nbsp; I nursed her
+with my salt tears, and bred her in straits; but the favour of
+God was with us, and she grew up to womanhood as lovely as the
+rose, and as blameless as the lily.&nbsp; In her time she was
+married to a farming lad.&nbsp; There never was a brawer pair in
+the kirk, than on that day when they gaed there first as man and
+wife.&nbsp; My heart was proud, and it pleased the Lord to
+chastise my pride&mdash;to nip my happiness, even in the
+bud.&nbsp; The very next day he got his arm crushed.&nbsp; It
+never got well again; and he fell into a decay, and died in the
+winter, leaving my Mary far on in the road to be a mother.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p120b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"A morning consultation"
+title=
+"A morning consultation"
+ src="images/p120s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>&ldquo;When her time drew near, we both happened to be working
+in the yard.&nbsp; She was delving to plant potatoes, and I told
+her it would do her hurt; but she was eager to provide something,
+as she said, for what might happen.&nbsp; Oh! it was an
+ill-omened word.&nbsp; The same night her trouble came on, and
+before the morning she was a cauld corpse, and another wee wee
+fatherless baby was greeting at my bosom&mdash;it was him
+that&rsquo;s noo awa&rsquo; in America.&nbsp; He grew up to be a
+fine bairn, with a warm heart, but a light head, and, wanting the
+rein of a father&rsquo;s power upon him, was no sa douce as I
+could have wished; but he was no man&rsquo;s foe save his
+own.&nbsp; I thought, and hoped, as he grew to years of
+discretion, he would have sobered, and been a consolation to my
+old age; but he&rsquo;s gone, and he&rsquo;ll never come
+back&mdash;disappointment is my portion in this world, and I have
+no hope; while I can do, I will seek no help, but threescore and
+fifteen can do little, and a small ail is a great evil to an aged
+woman, who has but the distaff for her breadwinner.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>I did all that I could to bid her be of good cheer, but the
+comfort of a hopeful spirit was dead within her; and she told me,
+that by many tokens she was assured her bairn was already
+slain.&mdash;&ldquo;Thrice,&rdquo; said she, &ldquo;I have seen
+his wraith&mdash;the first time he was in the pride of his young
+manhood, the next he was pale and wan, with a bloody and gashy
+wound in his side, and the third time there was a smoke, and,
+when it cleared away, I saw him in a grave, with neither
+winding-sheet nor coffin.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>The tale of this pious and resigned spirit dwelt in mine ear,
+and, when I went home, Mrs. Balwhidder thought that I had met
+with an o&rsquo;ercome, and was very uneasy; so she got the tea
+soon ready to make me better; but scarcely had we tasted the
+first cup when a loud lamentation was heard in the kitchen.&nbsp;
+This was from that tawpy the wife of Thomas Wilson, with her
+three weans.&nbsp; They had been seeking their meat among the
+farmer houses, and, in coming home, forgathered on the road with
+the Glasgow carrier, who told them that news had come, in the
+<i>London Gazette</i>, of a battle, in which the regiment that
+Thomas had listed in was engaged, and had suffered loss both in
+rank and file; none doubting that their head was in the number of
+the slain, the whole family grat aloud, and came to the manse,
+bewailing him as no more; and it afterwards turned out to be the
+case, making it plain to me that there is a farseeing discernment
+in the spirit, that reaches beyond the scope of our incarnate
+senses.</p>
+<p>But the weight of the war did not end with these afflictions;
+for, instead of the sorrow that the listing caused, and the
+anxiety after, and the grief of the bloody tidings, operating as
+wholesome admonition to our young men, the natural perversity of
+the human heart was more and more manifested.&nbsp; A wonderful
+interest was raised among us all to hear of what was going on in
+the world; insomuch, that I myself was no longer contented with
+the relation of the news of the month in the <i>Scots
+Magazine</i>, but joined with my father-in-law, Mr. Kibbock, to
+get a newspaper twice a-week from Edinburgh.&nbsp; As for Lady
+Macadam, who being naturally an impatient woman, she had one sent
+to her three times a-week from London, so that we had something
+fresh five times every week; and the old papers were lent out to
+the families who had friends in the wars.&nbsp; This was done on
+my suggestion, hoping it would make all content with their
+peaceable lot; but dominion for a time had been given to the
+power of contrariness, and it had quite an opposite effect.&nbsp;
+It begot a curiosity, egging on to enterprise; and, greatly to my
+sorrow, three of the brawest lads in the parish, or in any
+parish, all in one day took on with a party of the Scots Greys
+that were then lying in Ayr; and nothing would satisfy the
+callans at Mr. Lorimore&rsquo;s school, but, instead of their
+innocent plays with girs, and shinties, and sicklike, they must
+go ranking like soldiers, and fight sham-fights in bodies.&nbsp;
+In short, things grew to a perfect hostility, for a swarm of
+weans came out from the schools of Irville on a Saturday
+afternoon, and, forgathering with ours, they had a battle with
+stones on the toll-road, such as was dreadful to hear of; for
+many a one got a mark that day he will take to the grave with
+him.</p>
+<p>It was not, however, by accidents of the field only, that we
+were afflicted; those of the flood, too, were sent likewise
+against us.&nbsp; In the month of October, when the corn was yet
+in the holms, and on the cold land by the river side, the water
+of Irville swelled to a great spait, from bank to brae, sweeping
+all before it, and roaring, in its might, like an agent of divine
+displeasure, sent forth to punish the inhabitants of the
+earth.&nbsp; The loss of the victual was a thing reparable, and
+those that suffered did not greatly complain; for, in other
+respects, their harvest had been plenteous: but the river, in its
+fury, not content with overflowing the lands, burst through the
+sandy hills with a raging force, and a riving asunder of the
+solid ground, as when the fountains of the great deep were broken
+up.&nbsp; All in the parish was a-foot, and on the hills, some
+weeping and wringing their hands, not knowing what would happen,
+when they beheld the landmarks of the waters deserted, and the
+river breaking away through the country, like the war-horse set
+loose in his pasture, and glorying in his might.&nbsp; By this
+change in the way and channel of the river, all the mills in our
+parish were left more than half a mile from dam or lade; and the
+farmers through the whole winter, till the new mills were built,
+had to travel through a heavy road with their victual, which was
+a great grievance, and added not a little to the afflictions of
+this unhappy year, which to me were not without a particularity,
+by the death of a full cousin of Mrs. Balwhidder, my first wife;
+she was grievously burnt by looting over a candle.&nbsp; Her
+mutch, which was of the high structure then in vogue, took fire,
+and being fastened with corking-pins to a great toupee, it could
+not be got off until she had sustained a deadly injury, of which,
+after lingering long, she was kindly eased by her removal from
+trouble.&nbsp; This sore accident was to me a matter of deep
+concern and cogitation; but as it happened in Tarbolton, and no
+in our parish, I have only alluded to it to show, that when my
+people were chastised by the hand of Providence, their pastor was
+not spared, but had a drop from the same vial.</p>
+<h2><a name="page126"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+126</span>CHAPTER XIX<br />
+YEAR 1778</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> year was as the shadow of the
+bygane: there was less actual suffering, but what we came through
+cast a gloom among us, and we did not get up our spirits till the
+spring was far advanced; the corn was in the ear, and the sun far
+towards midsummer height, before there was any regular show of
+gladness in the parish.</p>
+<p>It was clear to me that the wars were not to be soon over; for
+I noticed, in the course of this year, that there was a greater
+christening of lad bairns than had ever been in any year during
+my incumbency; and grave and wise persons, observant of the signs
+of the times, said, that it had been long held as a sure
+prognostication of war, when the births of male children
+outnumbered that of females.</p>
+<p>Our chief misfortune in this year was a revival of that wicked
+mother of many mischiefs, the smuggling trade, which concerned me
+greatly; but it was not allowed to it to make any thing like a
+permanent stay among us, though in some of the neighbouring
+parishes, its ravages, both in morals and property, were very
+distressing, and many a mailing was sold to pay for the triumphs
+of the cutters and gaugers; for the government was by this time
+grown more eager, and the war caused the king&rsquo;s ships to be
+out and about, which increased the trouble of the smugglers,
+whose wits in their turn were thereby much sharpened.</p>
+<p>After Mrs. Malcolm, by the settlement of Captain Macadam, had
+given up her dealing, two maiden women, that were sisters, Betty
+and Janet Pawkie, came in among us from Ayr, where they had
+friends in league with some of the laigh land folk, that carried
+on the contraband with the Isle of Man, which was the very eye of
+the smuggling.&nbsp; They took up the tea-selling, which Mrs.
+Malcolm had dropped, and did business on a larger scale, having a
+general huxtry, with parliament-cakes, and candles, and
+pincushions, as well as other groceries, in their window.&nbsp;
+Whether they had any contraband dealings, or were only
+back-bitten, I cannot take it upon me to say; but it was
+jealoused in the parish that the meal in the sacks, that came to
+their door at night, and was sent to the Glasgow market in the
+morning, was not made of corn.&nbsp; They were, however, decent
+women, both sedate and orderly; the eldest, Betty Pawkie, was of
+a manly stature, and had a long beard, which made her have a
+coarse look; but she was, nevertheless, a worthy, well-doing
+creature, and at her death she left ten pounds to the poor of the
+parish, as may be seen in the mortification board that the
+session put up in the kirk as a testification and an example.</p>
+<p>Shortly after the revival of the smuggling, an exciseman was
+put among us, and the first was Robin Bicker, a very civil lad
+that had been a flunkey with Sir Hugh Montgomerie, when he was a
+residenter in Edinburgh, before the old Sir Hugh&rsquo;s
+death.&nbsp; He was a queer fellow, and had a coothy way of
+getting in about folk, the which was very serviceable to him in
+his vocation; nor was he overly gleg: but when a job was ill
+done, and he was obliged to notice it, he would often break out
+on the smugglers for being so stupid, so that for an exciseman he
+was wonderful well liked, and did not object to a waught of
+brandy at a time; when the auld wives ca&rsquo;d it
+well-water.&nbsp; It happened, however, that some unneighbourly
+person sent him notice of a clecking of tea chests, or brandy
+kegs, at which both Jenny and Betty Pawkie were the
+howdies.&nbsp; Robin could not but therefore enter their house;
+however, before going in, he just cried at the door to somebody
+on the road, so as to let the twa industrious lassies hear he was
+at hand.&nbsp; They were not slack in closing the trance-door,
+and putting stoups and stools behind it, so as to cause trouble,
+and give time before any body could get in.&nbsp; They then
+emptied their chaff-bed, and filled the tikeing with tea, and
+Betty went in on the top, covering herself with the blanket, and
+graining like a woman in labour.&nbsp; It was thought that Robin
+Bicker himself would not have been overly particular in searching
+the house, considering there was a woman seemingly in the
+death-thraws; but a sorner, an incomer from the east country, and
+that hung about the change-house as a divor hostler, that would
+rather gang a day&rsquo;s journey in the dark than turn a spade
+in day-light, came to him as he stood at the door, and went in
+with him to see the sport.&nbsp; Robin, for some reason, could
+not bid him go away, and both Betty and Janet were sure he was in
+the plot against them; indeed, it was always thought he was an
+informer, and no doubt he was something not canny, for he had a
+down look.</p>
+<p>It was some time before the doorway was cleared of the stoups
+and stools, and Jenny was in great concern, and flustered, as she
+said, for her poor sister, who was taken with a
+heart-colic.&nbsp; &ldquo;I&rsquo;m sorry for her,&rdquo; said
+Robin, &ldquo;but I&rsquo;ll be as quiet as possible;&rdquo; and
+so he searched all the house, but found nothing; at the which his
+companion, the divor east country hostler, swore an oath that
+could not be misunderstood; so, without more ado, but as all
+thought against the grain, Robin went up to sympathize with Betty
+in the bed, whose groans were loud and vehement.&nbsp; &ldquo;Let
+me feel your pulse,&rdquo; said Robin, and he looted down as she
+put forth her arm from aneath the clothes, and laying his hand on
+the bed, cried, &ldquo;Hey! what&rsquo;s this? this is a costly
+filling.&rdquo;&nbsp; Upon which Betty jumpet up quite recovered,
+and Jenny fell to the wailing and railing, while the hostler from
+the east country took the bed of tea on his back, to carry it to
+the change-house, till a cart was gotten to take it into the
+custom-house at Irville.</p>
+<p>Betty Pawkie being thus suddenly cured, and grudging the loss
+of property, took a knife in her hand, and as the divor was
+crossing the burn at the stepping-stones that lead to the back of
+the change-house, she ran after him and ripped up the tikeing,
+and sent all the tea floating away on the burn, which was thought
+a brave action of Betty, and the story not a little helped to
+lighten our melancholy meditations.</p>
+<p>Robin Bicker was soon after this affair removed to another
+district, and we got in his place one Mungo Argyle, who was as
+proud as a provost, being come of Highland parentage.&nbsp; Black
+was the hour he came among my people; for he was needy and
+greedy, and rode on the top of his commission.&nbsp; Of all the
+manifold ills in the train of smuggling, surely the excisemen are
+the worst, and the setting of this rabiator over us was a severe
+judgment for our sins.&nbsp; But he suffered for&rsquo;t, and
+peace be with him in the grave, where the wicked cease from
+troubling!</p>
+<p>Willie Malcolm, the youngest son of his mother, had by this
+time learned all that Mr. Lorimore, the schoolmaster, could
+teach; and as it was evidenced to every body, by his mild manners
+and saintliness of demeanour, that he was a chosen vessel, his
+mother longed to fulfil his own wish, which was doubtless the
+natural working of the act of grace that had been shed upon him;
+but she had not the wherewithal to send him to the college of
+Glasgow, where he was desirous to study, and her just pride would
+not allow her to cess his brother-in-law, the Captain Macadam,
+whom, I should now mention, was raised in the end of this year,
+as we read in the newspapers, to be a major.&nbsp; I thought her
+in this somewhat unreasonable, for she would not be persuaded to
+let me write to the captain; but when I reflected on the good
+that Willie Malcolm might in time do as a preacher, I said
+nothing more to her, but indited a letter to the Lord Eaglesham,
+setting forth the lad&rsquo;s parts, telling who he was and all
+about his mother&rsquo;s scruples; and, by the retour of the post
+from London his lordship sent me an order on his steward, to pay
+me twenty pounds towards equipping my proteg&eacute;e, as he
+called Willie, with a promise to pay for his education, which was
+such a great thing for his lordship to do off-hand on my
+recommendation, that it won much affection throughout the country
+side; and folks began to wonder, rehearsing the great things, as
+was said, that I had gotten my lord at different times, and on
+divers occasions, to do, which had a vast of influence among my
+brethren of the presbytery, and they grew into a state of greater
+cordiality with me, looking on me as a man having authority; but
+I was none thereat lifted up, for not being gifted with the power
+of a kirk-filling eloquence, I was but little sought for at
+sacraments, and fasts, and solemn days, which was doubtless well
+ordained; for I had no motive to seek fame in foreign pulpits,
+but was left to walk in the paths of simplicity within my own
+parish.&nbsp; To eschew evil myself, and to teach others to do
+the same, I thought the main duties of the pastoral office, and
+with a sincere heart endeavoured what in me lay to perform them
+with meekness, sobriety, and a spirit wakeful to the inroads of
+sin and Satan.&nbsp; But oh, the sordiness of human
+nature!&mdash;The kindness of the Lord Eaglesham&rsquo;s own
+disposition was ascribed to my influence, and many a dry answer I
+was obliged to give to applicants that would have me trouble his
+lordship, as if I had a claim upon him.&nbsp; In the ensuing
+year, the notion of my cordiality with him came to a great head,
+and brought about an event, that could not have been forethought
+by me as a thing within the compass of possibility to bring to
+pass.</p>
+<h2><a name="page133"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+133</span>CHAPTER XX<br />
+YEAR 1779</h2>
+<p>I <span class="smcap">was</span> named in this year for the
+General Assembly, and Mrs. Balwhidder, by her continual thrift,
+having made our purse able to stand a shake against the wind, we
+resolved to go into Edinburgh in a creditable manner.&nbsp;
+Accordingly, in conjunct with Mrs. Dalrymple, the lady of a major
+of that name, we hired the Irville chaise, and we put up in
+Glasgow, at the Black Boy, where we stayed all night.&nbsp; Next
+morning, by seven o&rsquo;clock, we got into a fly-coach for the
+capital of Scotland, which we reached after a heavy journey about
+the same hour in the evening, and put up at the public where it
+stopped till the next day; for really both me and Mrs. Balwhidder
+were worn out with the undertaking, and found a cup of tea a vast
+refreshment.</p>
+<p>Betimes, in the morning, having taken our breakfast, we got a
+caddy to guide us and our wallise to Widow M&lsquo;Vicar&rsquo;s,
+at the head of the Covenanters&rsquo; Close.&nbsp; She was a
+relation to my first wife, Betty Lanshaw, my own full cousin that
+was, and we had advised her, by course of post, of our coming,
+and intendment to lodge with her as uncos and strangers.&nbsp;
+But Mrs. M&lsquo;Vicar kept a cloth shop, and sold plaidings and
+flannels, besides Yorkshire superfines, and was used to the
+sudden incoming of strangers, especially visitants, both from the
+West and the North Highlands, and was withal a gawsy furthy
+woman, taking great pleasure in hospitality, and every sort of
+kindliness and discretion.&nbsp; She would not allow of such a
+thing as our being lodgers in her house, but was so cagey to see
+us, and to have it in her power to be civil to a minister, as she
+was pleased to say, of such repute, that nothing less would
+content her but that we must live upon her, and partake of all
+the best that could be gotten for us within the walls of
+&ldquo;the gude town.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>When we found ourselves so comfortable, Mrs. Balwhidder and me
+waited on my patron&rsquo;s family that was, the young ladies,
+and the laird, who had been my pupil, but was now an advocate
+high in the law.&nbsp; They likewise were kind also.&nbsp; In
+short, every body in Edinburgh were in a manner wearisome kind,
+and we could scarcely find time to see the Castle and the palace
+of Holyrood-house, and that more sanctified place, where the
+Maccabeus of the Kirk of Scotland, John Knox, was wont to
+live.</p>
+<p>Upon my introduction to his grace the Commissioner, I was
+delighted and surprised to find the Lord Eaglesham at the levee,
+and his lordship was so glad on seeing me, that he made me more
+kenspeckle than I could have wished to have been in his
+grace&rsquo;s presence; for, owing to the same, I was required to
+preach before his grace, upon a jocose recommendation of his
+lordship; the which gave me great concern, and daunted me so that
+in the interim I was almost bereft of all peace and studious
+composure of mind.&nbsp; Fain would I have eschewed the honour
+that was thus thrust upon me; but both my wife and Mrs.
+M&lsquo;Vicar were just lifted out of themselves with the
+thought.</p>
+<p>When the day came, I thought all things in this world were
+loosened from their hold, and that the sure and steadfast earth
+itself was grown coggly beneath my feet, as I mounted the
+pulpit.&nbsp; With what sincerity I prayed for help that day! and
+never stood man more in need of it; for through all my prayer the
+congregation was so watchful and still, doubtless to note if my
+doctrine was orthodox, that the beating of my heart might have
+been heard to the uttermost corners of the kirk.</p>
+<p>I had chosen as my text, from Second Samuel, xixth chapter and
+35th verse, these words&mdash;&ldquo;Can I hear any more the
+voice of singing men and singing women?&nbsp; Wherefore, then,
+should thy servant be yet a burden to the king?&rdquo;&nbsp; And
+hardly had I with a trembling voice read the words, when I
+perceived an awful stir in the congregation; for all applied the
+words to the state of the church, and the appointment of his
+grace the Commissioner.&nbsp; Having paused after giving out the
+text, the same fearful and critical silence again ensued, and
+every eye was so fixed upon me, that I was for a time deprived of
+courage to look about; but heaven was pleased to compassionate my
+infirmity, and as I proceeded, I began to warm as in my own
+pulpit.&nbsp; I described the gorgeous Babylonian harlot riding
+forth in her chariots of gold and silver, with trampling steeds
+and a hurricane of followers, drunk with the cup of abominations,
+all shouting with revelry, and glorying in her triumph, treading
+down in their career those precious pearls, the saints and
+martyrs, into the mire beneath their swinish feet.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;Before her you may behold Wantonness playing the tinkling
+cymbal, Insolence beating the drum, and Pride blowing the
+trumpet.&nbsp; Every vice is there with his emblems; and the
+seller of pardons, with his crucifix and triple crown, is
+distributing his largess of perdition.&nbsp; The voices of men
+shout to set wide the gates, to give entrance to the queen of
+nations, and the gates are set wide, and they all enter.&nbsp;
+The avenging gates close on them&mdash;they are all shut up in
+hell.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>There was a sough in the kirk as I said these words; for the
+vision I described seemed to be passing before me as I spoke, and
+I felt as if I had witnessed the everlasting destruction of
+Antichrist, and the worshippers of the Beast.&nbsp; But soon
+recovering myself, I said in a soft and gentle manner,
+&ldquo;Look at yon lovely creature in virgin-raiment, with the
+Bible in her hand.&nbsp; See how mildly she walks along, giving
+alms to the poor as she passes on towards the door of that lowly
+dwelling&mdash;Let us follow her in&mdash;She takes her seat in
+the chair at the bedside of the poor old dying sinner; and as he
+tosses in the height of penitence and despair, she reads to him
+the promise of the Saviour&mdash;&lsquo;This night thou shalt be
+with me in Paradise;&rsquo; and he embraces her with transports,
+and, falling back on his pillow, calmly closes his eyes in
+peace.&nbsp; She is the true religion; and when I see what she
+can do even in the last moments of the guilty, well may we
+exclaim, when we think of the symbols and pageantry of the
+departed superstition, Can I hear any more the voice of singing
+men and singing women?&nbsp; No; let us cling to the simplicity
+of the Truth that is now established in our native
+land.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>At the conclusion of this clause of my discourse, the
+congregation, which had been all so still and so solemn, never
+coughing, as was often the case among my people, gave a great
+rustle, changing their positions, by which I was almost overcome;
+however, I took heart and ventured on, and pointed out that, with
+our Bible and an orthodox priesthood, we stood in no need of the
+king&rsquo;s authority, however bound we were, in temporal
+things, to respect it; and I showed this at some length, crying
+out in the words of my text, &ldquo;Wherefore, then, should thy
+servant be yet a burden to the king?&rdquo; in the saying of
+which I happened to turn my eyes towards his grace the
+Commissioner, as he sat on the throne, and I thought his
+countenance was troubled, which made me add, that he might not
+think I meant him any offence, &ldquo;That the King of the Church
+was one before whom the great, and the wise, and the
+good&mdash;all doomed and sentenced convicts&mdash;implore his
+mercy.&rdquo;&nbsp; &ldquo;It is true,&rdquo; said I, &ldquo;that
+in the days of his tribulation he was wounded for our iniquities,
+and died to save us; but, at his death, his greatness was
+proclaimed by the quick and the dead.&nbsp; There was sorrow, and
+there was wonder, and there was rage, and there was remorse; but
+there was no shame there&mdash;none blushed on that day at that
+sight but yon glorious luminary.&rdquo;&nbsp; The congregation
+rose, and looked round, as the sun that I pointed at shone in at
+the window.&nbsp; I was disconcerted by their movement, and my
+spirit was spent, so that I could say no more.</p>
+<p>When I came down from the pulpit, there was a great pressing
+in of acquaintance and ministers, who lauded me exceedingly; but
+I thought it could be only in derision, therefore I slipped home
+to Mrs. M&lsquo;Vicar&rsquo;s as fast as I could.</p>
+<p>Mrs. M&lsquo;Vicar, who was a clever, hearing-all sort of a
+neighbour, said my sermon was greatly thought of, and that I had
+surprised everybody; but I was fearful there was something of
+jocularity at the bottom of this, for she was a flaunty woman,
+and liked well to give a good-humoured gibe or jeer.&nbsp;
+However, his grace the Commissioner was very thankful for the
+discourse, and complimented me on what he called my apostolical
+earnestness; but he was a courteous man, and I could not trust to
+him, especially as my lord Eaglesham had told me in secrecy
+before&mdash;it&rsquo;s true, it was in his gallanting
+way&mdash;that, in speaking of the king&rsquo;s servant as I had
+done, I had rather gone beyond the bounds of modern
+moderation.&nbsp; Altogether, I found neither pleasure nor profit
+in what was thought so great an honour, but longed for the
+privacy of my own narrow pasture, and little flock.</p>
+<p>It was in this visit to Edinburgh that Mrs. Balwhidder bought
+her silver teapot, and other ornamental articles; but this was
+not done, as she assured me, in a vain spirit of bravery, which I
+could not have abided, but because it was well known that tea
+draws better in a silver pot, and drinks pleasanter in a china
+cup, than out of any other kind of cup or teapot.</p>
+<p>By the time I got home to the manse, I had been three whole
+weeks and five days absent, which was more than all my absences
+together, from the time of my placing; and my people were glowing
+with satisfaction when they saw us driving in a Glasgow chaise
+through the clachan to the manse.</p>
+<p>The rest of the year was merely a quiet succession of small
+incidents, none of which are worthy of notation, though they were
+all severally, no doubt, of aught somewhere, as they took us both
+time and place in the coming to pass, and nothing comes to pass
+without helping onwards to some great end; each particular little
+thing that happens in the world being a seed sown by the hand of
+Providence to yield an increase, which increase is destined, in
+its turn, to minister to some higher purpose, until at last the
+issue affects the whole earth.&nbsp; There is nothing in all the
+world that doth not advance the cause of goodness; no, not even
+the sins of the wicked, though, through the dim casement of her
+mortal tabernacle, the soul of man cannot discern the method
+thereof.</p>
+<h2><a name="page141"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+141</span>CHAPTER XXI<br />
+YEAR 1780</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> was, among ourselves, another
+year of few events.&nbsp; A sound, it is true, came among us of a
+design, on the part of the government in London, to bring back
+the old harlotry of papistry; but we spent our time in the lea of
+the hedge, and the lown of the hill.&nbsp; Some there were that a
+panic seized upon when they heard of Lord George Gordon, that
+zealous Protestant, being committed to the Tower; but for my
+part, I had no terror upon me, for I saw all things around me
+going forward improving; and I said to myself, it is not so when
+Providence permits scathe and sorrow to fall upon a nation.&nbsp;
+Civil troubles, and the casting down of thrones, is always
+forewarned by want and poverty striking the people.&nbsp; What I
+have, therefore, chiefly to record as the memorables of this
+year, are things of small import&mdash;the main of which are,
+that some of the neighbouring lairds, taking example by Mr.
+Kibbock, my father-in-law that was, began in this fall to plant
+the tops of their hills with mounts of fir-trees; and Mungo
+Argyle, the exciseman, just herried the poor smugglers to death,
+and made a power of prize-money, which, however, had not the
+wonted effect of riches, for it brought him no honour; and he
+lived in the parish like a leper, or any other kind of
+excommunicated person.</p>
+<p>But I should not forget a most droll thing that took place
+with Jenny Gaffaw, and her daughter.&nbsp; They had been missed
+from the parish for some days, and folk began to be uneasy about
+what could have become of the two silly creatures; till one
+night, at the dead hour, a strange light was seen beaming and
+burning at the window of the bit hole where they lived.&nbsp; It
+was first observed by Lady Macadam, who never went to bed at any
+Christian hour, but sat up reading her new French novels and
+play-books with Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress.&nbsp; She gave
+the alarm, thinking that such a great and continuous light from a
+lone house, where never candle had been seen before, could be
+nothing less than the flame of a burning.&nbsp; And sending Miss
+Sabrina and the servants to see what was the matter, they beheld
+daft Jenny, and her as daft daughter, with a score of candle
+doups, (Heaven only knows where they got them!) placed in the
+window, and the twa fools dancing, and linking, and admiring
+before the door.&nbsp; &ldquo;What&rsquo;s all this about,
+Jenny,&rdquo; said Miss Sabrina.&mdash;&ldquo;Awa&rsquo;
+wi&rsquo; you, awa&rsquo; wi&rsquo; you&mdash;ye wicked pope, ye
+whore of Babylon&mdash;is na it for the glory of God, and the
+Protestant religion? d&rsquo;ye think I will be a pope as long as
+light can put out darkness?&rdquo;&mdash;And with that the mother
+and daughter began again to leap and dance as madly as
+before.</p>
+<p>It seems that poor Jenny, having heard of the luminations that
+were lighted up through the country on the ending of the Popish
+Bill, had, with Meg, travelled by themselves into Glasgow, where
+they had gathered or begged a stock of candles, and coming back
+under the cloud of night, had surprised and alarmed the whole
+clachan, by lighting up their window in the manner that I have
+described.&nbsp; Poor Miss Sabrina, at Jenny&rsquo;s uncivil
+salutation, went back to my lady with her heart full, and would
+fain have had the idiots brought to task before the session, for
+what they had said to her.&nbsp; But I would not hear tell of
+such a thing, for which Miss Sabrina owed me a grudge that was
+not soon given up.&nbsp; At the same time, I was grieved to see
+the testimonies of joyfulness for a holy victory, brought into
+such disrepute by the ill-timed demonstrations of the two
+irreclaimable naturals, that had not a true conception of the
+cause for which they were triumphing.</p>
+<h2><a name="page144"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+144</span>CHAPTER XXII<br />
+YEAR 1781</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">If</span> the two last years passed
+o&rsquo;er the heads of me and my people without any manifest
+dolour, which is a great thing to say for so long a period in
+this world, we had our own trials and tribulations in the one of
+which I have now to make mention.&nbsp; Mungo Argyle, the
+exciseman, waxing rich, grew proud and petulant, and would have
+ruled the country side with a rod of iron.&nbsp; Nothing less
+would serve him than a fine horse to ride on, and a world of
+other conveniences and luxuries, as if he had been on an equality
+with gentlemen.&nbsp; And he bought a grand gun, which was called
+a fowling-piece; and he had two pointer dogs, the like of which
+had not been seen in the parish since the planting of the
+Eaglesham-wood on the moorland, which was four years before I got
+the call.&nbsp; Every body said the man was fey; and truly, when
+I remarked him so gallant and gay on the Sabbath at the kirk, and
+noted his glowing face and gleg een, I thought at times there was
+something no canny about him.&nbsp; It was indeed clear to be
+seen, that the man was hurried out of himself; but nobody could
+have thought that the death he was to dree would have been what
+it was.</p>
+<p>About the end of summer my Lord Eaglesham came to the castle,
+bringing with him an English madam, that was his Miss.&nbsp; Some
+days after he came down from London, as he was riding past the
+manse, his lordship stopped to enquire for my health, and I went
+to the door to speak to him.&nbsp; I thought that he did not meet
+me with that blithe countenance he was wont, and in going away,
+he said with a blush, &ldquo;I fear I dare not ask you to come to
+the castle.&rdquo;&nbsp; I had heard of his concubine, and I
+said, &ldquo;In saying so, my lord, you show a spark of grace;
+for it would not become me to see what I have heard; and I am
+surprised, my lord, you will not rather take a lady of your
+own.&rdquo;&nbsp; He looked kindly, but confused, saying, he did
+not know where to get one; so seeing his shame, and not wishing
+to put him out of conceit entirely with himself, I replied,
+&ldquo;Na, na, my lord, there&rsquo;s nobody will believe that,
+for there never was a silly Jock, but there was as silly a
+Jenny,&rdquo; at which he laughed heartily, and rode away.&nbsp;
+But I know not what was in&rsquo;t; I was troubled in mind about
+him, and thought, as he was riding away, that I would never see
+him again; and sure enough it so happened; for the next day,
+being airing in his coach with Miss Spangle, the lady he had
+brought, he happened to see Mungo Argyle with his dogs and his
+gun, and my lord being as particular about his game as the other
+was about boxes of tea and kegs of brandy, he jumped out of the
+carriage, and ran to take the gun.&nbsp; Words passed, and the
+exciseman shot my lord.&nbsp; Never shall I forget that day; such
+riding, such running, the whole country side afoot; but the same
+night my lord breathed his last; and the mad and wild reprobate
+that did the deed was taken up and sent off to Edinburgh.&nbsp;
+This was a woeful riddance of that oppressor, for my lord was a
+good landlord and a kind-hearted man; and albeit, though a little
+thoughtless, was aye ready to make his power, when the way was
+pointed out, minister to good works.&nbsp; The whole parish
+mourned for him, and there was not a sorer heart in all its
+bounds than my own.&nbsp; Never was such a sight seen as his
+burial: the whole country side was there, and all as solemn as if
+they had been assembled in the valley of Jehoshaphat in the
+latter day.&nbsp; The hedges where the funeral was to pass were
+clad with weans, like bunches of hips and haws, and the kirkyard
+was as if all its own dead were risen.&nbsp; Never, do I think,
+was such a multitude gathered together.&nbsp; Some thought there
+could not be less than three thousand grown men, besides women
+and children.</p>
+<p>Scarcely was this great public calamity past, for it could be
+reckoned no less, when one Saturday afternoon, as Miss Sabrina,
+the schoolmistress, was dining with Lady Macadam, her ladyship
+was stricken with the paralytics, and her face so thrown in the
+course of a few minutes, that Miss Sabrina came flying to the
+manse for the help and advice of Mrs. Balwhidder.&nbsp; A doctor
+was gotten with all speed by express; but her ladyship was
+smitten beyond the reach of medicine.&nbsp; She lived, however,
+some time after; but oh! she was such an object, that it was a
+grief to see her.&nbsp; She could only mutter when she tried to
+speak, and was as helpless as a baby.&nbsp; Though she never
+liked me, nor could I say there was many things in her demeanour
+that pleased me; yet she was a free-handed woman to the needful,
+and when she died she was more missed than it was thought she
+could have been.</p>
+<p>Shortly after her funeral, which was managed by a gentleman
+sent from her friends in Edinburgh, that I wrote to about her
+condition, the Major, her son, with his lady, Kate Malcolm, and
+two pretty bairns, came and stayed in her house for a time, and
+they were a great happiness to us all, both in the way of
+drinking tea, and sometimes taking a bit of dinner, their only
+mother now, the worthy and pious Mrs. Malcolm, being regularly of
+the company.</p>
+<p>Before the end of the year, I should mention, that the fortune
+of Mrs. Malcolm&rsquo;s family got another shove upwards, by the
+promotion of her second son, Robert Malcolm, who, being grown an
+expert and careful mariner, was made captain of a grand ship,
+whereof Provost Maitland of Glasgow, that was kind to his mother
+in her distresses, was the owner.&nbsp; But that douce lad
+Willie, her youngest son, who was at the university of Glasgow
+under the Lord Eaglesham&rsquo;s patronage, was like to have
+suffered a blight.&nbsp; However, Major Macadam, when I spoke to
+him anent the young man&rsquo;s loss of his patron, said, with a
+pleasant generosity, he should not be stickit; and, accordingly,
+he made up, as far as money could, for the loss of his lordship;
+but there was none that made up for the great power and
+influence, which, I have no doubt, the Earl would have exerted in
+his behalf, when he was ripened for the church.&nbsp; So that,
+although in time William came out a sound and heart-searching
+preacher, he was long obliged, like many another unfriended
+saint, to cultivate sand, and wash Ethiopians in the shape of an
+east country gentleman&rsquo;s camstrairy weans; than which, as
+he wrote me himself, there cannot be on earth a greater trial of
+temper.&nbsp; However, in the end he was rewarded, and is not
+only now a placed minister, but a doctor of divinity.</p>
+<p>The death of Lady Macadam was followed by another parochial
+misfortune; for, considering the time when it happened, we could
+count it as nothing less.&nbsp; Auld Thomas Howkings, the
+betheral, fell sick, and died in the course of a week&rsquo;s
+illness, about the end of November; and the measles coming at
+that time upon the parish, there was such a smashery of the poor
+weans as had not been known for an age; insomuch that James
+Banes, the lad who was Thomas Howkings&rsquo; helper, rose in
+open rebellion against the session during his superior&rsquo;s
+illness; and we were constrained to augment his pay, and to
+promise him the place if Thomas did not recover, which it was
+then thought he could not do.&nbsp; On the day this happened,
+there were three dead children in the clachan, and a panic and
+consternation spread about the burial of them when James
+Bane&rsquo;s insurrection was known, which made both me and the
+session glad to hush up the affair, that the heart of the public
+might have no more than the sufferings of individuals to hurt
+it.&mdash;Thus ended a year, on many accounts, heavy to be
+remembered.</p>
+<h2><a name="page150"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+150</span>CHAPTER XXIII<br />
+YEAR 1782</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">Although</span> I have not been particular
+in noticing it, from time to time, there had been an occasional
+going off, at fairs and on market-days, of the lads of the parish
+as soldiers, and when Captain Malcolm got the command of his
+ship, no less than four young men sailed with him from the
+clachan; so that we were deeper and deeper interested in the
+proceedings of the doleful war that was raging in the
+plantations.&nbsp; By one post we heard of no less than three
+brave fellows belonging to us being slain in one battle, for
+which there was a loud and general lamentation.</p>
+<p>Shortly after this, I got a letter from Charles Malcolm, a
+very pretty letter it indeed was: he had heard of my Lord
+Eaglesham&rsquo;s murder, and grieved for the loss, both because
+his lordship was a good man, and because he had been such a
+friend to him and his family.&nbsp; &ldquo;But,&rdquo; said
+Charles, &ldquo;the best way I can show my gratitude for his
+patronage, is to prove myself a good officer to my king and
+country.&rdquo;&nbsp; Which I thought a brave sentiment, and was
+pleased thereat; for somehow Charles, from the time he brought me
+the limes to make a bowl of punch, in his pocket from Jamaica,
+had built a nest of affection in my heart.&nbsp; But, oh! the
+wicked wastry of life in war.&nbsp; In less than a month after,
+the news came of a victory over the French fleet, and by the same
+post I got a letter from Mr. Howard, that was the midshipman who
+came to see us with Charles, telling me that poor Charles had
+been mortally wounded in the action, and had afterwards died of
+his wounds.&nbsp; &ldquo;He was a hero in the engagement,&rdquo;
+said Mr. Howard, &ldquo;and he died as a good and a brave man
+should.&rdquo;&mdash;These tidings gave me one of the sorest
+hearts I ever suffered, and it was long before I could gather
+fortitude to disclose the tidings to poor Charles&rsquo;s
+mother.&nbsp; But the callants of the school had heard of the
+victory, and were going shouting about, and had set the steeple
+bell a-ringing, by which Mrs. Malcolm heard the news; and knowing
+that Charles&rsquo;s ship was with the fleet, she came over to
+the manse in great anxiety to hear the particulars, somebody
+telling her that there had been a foreign letter to me by the
+postman.</p>
+<p>When I saw her I could not speak, but looked at her in pity,
+and, the tear fleeing up into my eyes, she guessed what had
+happened.&nbsp; After giving a deep and sore sigh, she enquired,
+&ldquo;How did he behave?&nbsp; I hope well, for he was aye a
+gallant laddie!&rdquo;&mdash;and then she wept very
+bitterly.&nbsp; However, growing calmer, I read to her the
+letter; and, when I had done, she begged me to give it to her to
+keep, saying, &ldquo;It&rsquo;s all that I have now left of my
+pretty boy; but it&rsquo;s mair precious to me than the wealth of
+the Indies;&rdquo; and she begged me to return thanks to the Lord
+for all the comforts and manifold mercies with which her lot had
+been blessed, since the hour she put her trust in him alone; and
+that was when she was left a penniless widow, with her five
+fatherless bairns.</p>
+<p>It was just an edification of the spirit to see the Christian
+resignation of this worthy woman.&nbsp; Mrs. Balwhidder was
+confounded, and said, there was more sorrow in seeing the deep
+grief of her fortitude than tongue could tell.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p152b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Old Herd"
+title=
+"The Old Herd"
+ src="images/p152s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>Having taken a glass of wine with her, I walked out to conduct
+her to her own house; but in the way we met with a severe
+trial.&nbsp; All the weans were out parading with napkins and
+kail-blades on sticks, rejoicing and triumphing in the glad
+tidings of victory.&nbsp; But when they saw me and Mrs. Malcolm
+coming slowly along, they guessed what had happened, and threw
+away their banners of joy; and standing all up in a row, with
+silence and sadness, along the kirkyard wall as we passed, showed
+an instinct of compassion that penetrated to my very soul.&nbsp;
+The poor mother burst into fresh affliction, and some of the
+bairns into an audible weeping; and, taking one another by the
+hand, they followed us to her door, like mourners at a
+funeral.&nbsp; Never was such a sight seen in any town
+before.&nbsp; The neighbours came to look at it as we walked
+along, and the men turned aside to hide their faces; while the
+mothers pressed their babies fondlier to their bosoms, and
+watered their innocent faces with their tears.</p>
+<p>I prepared a suitable sermon, taking as the words of my text,
+&ldquo;Howl, ye ships of Tarshish, for your strength is laid
+waste.&rdquo;&nbsp; But when I saw around me so many of my people
+clad in complimentary mourning for the gallant Charles Malcolm,
+and that even poor daft Jenny Gaffaw, and her daughter, had on an
+old black riband; and when I thought of him, the spirited laddie,
+coming home from Jamaica with his parrot on his shoulder, and his
+limes for me, my heart filled full, and I was obliged to sit down
+in the pulpit, and drop a tear.</p>
+<p>After a pause, and the Lord having vouchsafed to compose me, I
+rose up, and gave out that anthem of triumph, the 124th psalm,
+the singing of which brought the congregation round to
+themselves; but still I felt that I could not preach as I had
+meant to do; therefore I only said a few words of prayer, and
+singing another psalm, dismissed the congregation.</p>
+<h2><a name="page154"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+154</span>CHAPTER XXIV<br />
+YEAR 1783</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> was another Sabbath year of my
+ministry.&nbsp; It has left me nothing to record but a silent
+increase of prosperity in the parish.&nbsp; I myself had now in
+the bank more than a thousand pounds, and every thing was
+thriving around.&nbsp; My two bairns, Gilbert, that is now the
+merchant in Glasgow, was grown into a sturdy ramplor laddie, and
+Janet, that is married upon Dr. Kittleword, the minister of
+Swappington, was as fine a lassie for her years as the eyes of a
+parent could desire to see.</p>
+<p>Shortly after the news of the peace, an event at which all
+gave themselves up to joy, a thing happened among us that at the
+time caused much talk; but although very dreadful, was yet not so
+serious, some how or other, as such an awsome doing should have
+been.&nbsp; Poor Jenny Gaffaw happened to take a heavy cold, and
+soon thereafter died.&nbsp; Meg went about from house to house,
+begging dead-clothes, and got the body straighted in a wonderful
+decent manner, with a plate of earth and salt placed upon
+it&mdash;an admonitory type of mortality and eternal life that
+has ill-advisedly gone out of fashion.&nbsp; When I heard of
+this, I could not but go to see how a creature that was not
+thought possessed of a grain of understanding, could have done so
+much herself.&nbsp; On entering the door, I beheld Meg sitting
+with two or three of the neighbouring kimmers, and the corpse
+laid out on a bed.&nbsp; &ldquo;Come awa&rsquo;, sir,&rdquo; said
+Meg; &ldquo;this is an altered house.&nbsp; They&rsquo;re gane
+that keepit it bein; but, sir, we maun a&rsquo; come to
+this&mdash;we maun pay the debt o&rsquo; nature&mdash;death is a
+grim creditor, and a doctor but brittle bail when the hour of
+reckoning&rsquo;s at han&rsquo;!&nbsp; What a pity it is, mother,
+that you&rsquo;re now dead, for here&rsquo;s the minister come to
+see you.&nbsp; Oh, sir! but she would have had a proud heart to
+see you in her dwelling, for she had a genteel turn, and would
+not let me, her only daughter, mess or mell wi&rsquo; the lathron
+lasses of the clachan.&nbsp; Ay, ay, she brought me up with care,
+and edicated me for a lady: nae coarse wark darkened my
+lily-white hands.&nbsp; But I maun work now; I maun dree the
+penalty of man.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Having stopped some time, listening to the curious maunnering
+of Meg, I rose to come away; but she laid her hand on my arm,
+saying, &ldquo;No, sir, ye maun taste before ye gang!&nbsp; My
+mother had aye plenty in her life, nor shall her latter day be
+needy.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>Accordingly, Meg, with all the due formality common on such
+occasions, produced a bottle of water, and a dram-glass, which
+she filled and tasted, then presented to me, at the same time
+offering me a bit of bread on a slate.&nbsp; It was a
+consternation to everybody how the daft creature had learnt all
+the ceremonies, which she performed in a manner past the power of
+pen to describe, making the solemnity of death, by her strange
+mockery, a kind of merriment, that was more painful than sorrow;
+but some spirits are gifted with a faculty of observation, that,
+by the strength of a little fancy, enables them to make a
+wonderful and truthlike semblance of things and events, which
+they never saw, and poor Meg seemed to have this gift.</p>
+<p>The same night, the session having provided a coffin, the body
+was put in, and removed to Mr. Mutchkin&rsquo;s brewhouse, where
+the lads and lassies kept the late-wake.</p>
+<p>Saving this, the year flowed in a calm, and we floated on in
+the stream of time towards the great ocean of eternity, like
+ducks and geese in the river&rsquo;s tide, that are carried down
+without being sensible of the speed of the current.&nbsp; Alas!
+we have not wings like them, to fly back to the place we set out
+from.</p>
+<h2><a name="page157"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+157</span>CHAPTER XXV<br />
+YEAR 1784</h2>
+<p>I <span class="smcap">have</span> ever thought that this was a
+bright year, truly an Ann. Dom., for in it many of the lads came
+home that had listed to be soldiers; and Mr. Howard, that was the
+midshipman, being now a captain of a man-of-war, came down from
+England and married Effie Malcolm, and took her up with him to
+London, where she wrote to her mother, that she found his family
+people of great note, and more kind to her than she could
+write.&nbsp; By this time, also, Major Macadam was made a
+colonel, and lived with his lady in Edinburgh, where they were
+much respected by the genteeler classes, Mrs. Macadam being
+considered a great unco among them for all manner of ladylike
+ornaments, she having been taught every sort of perfection in
+that way by the old lady, who was educated at the court of
+France, and was, from her birth, a person of quality.&nbsp; In
+this year, also, Captain Malcolm, her brother, married a daughter
+of a Glasgow merchant, so that Mrs. Malcolm, in her declining
+years, had the prospect of a bright setting; but nothing could
+change the sober Christianity of her settled mind; and although
+she was strongly invited, both by the Macadams and the Howards,
+to see their felicity, she ever declined the same,
+saying&mdash;&ldquo;No!&nbsp; I have been long out of the world,
+or rather, I have never been in it; my ways are not as theirs;
+and although I ken their hearts would be glad to be kind to me, I
+might fash their servants, or their friends might think me unlike
+other folk, by which, instead of causing pleasure, mortification
+might ensue; so I will remain in my own house, trusting that,
+when they can spare the time, they will come and see
+me.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>There was a spirit of true wisdom in this resolution, for it
+required a forbearance that in weaker minds would have relaxed;
+but though a person of a most slender and delicate frame of body,
+she was a Judith in fortitude; and in all the fortune that seemed
+now smiling upon her, she never was lifted up, but bore always
+that pale and meek look, which gave a saintliness to her
+endeavours in the days of her suffering and poverty.</p>
+<p>But when we enjoy most, we have least to tell.&nbsp; I look
+back on this year as on a sunny spot in the valley, amidst the
+shadows of the clouds of time; and I have nothing to record, save
+the remembrance of welcomings and weddings, and a meeting of
+bairns and parents, that the wars and the waters had long raged
+between.&nbsp; Contentment within the bosom, lent a livelier
+grace to the countenance of Nature; and everybody said, that in
+this year the hedges were greener than common, the gowans
+brighter on the brae, and the heads of the statelier trees
+adorned with a richer coronal of leaves and blossoms.&nbsp; All
+things were animated with the gladness of thankfulness, and
+testified to the goodness of their Maker.</p>
+<h2><a name="page160"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+160</span>CHAPTER XXVI<br />
+YEAR 1785</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">Well</span> may we say, in the pious words
+of my old friend and neighbour, the Reverend Mr. Keekie of
+Loupinton, that the world is such a wheel-carriage, that it might
+very properly be called the <span
+class="GutSmall">WHIRL&rsquo;D</span>.&nbsp; This reflection was
+brought home to me in a very striking manner, while I was
+preparing a discourse for my people, to be preached on the
+anniversary day of my placing, in which I took a view of what had
+passed in the parish during the five-and-twenty years that I had
+been, by the grace of God, the pastor thereof.&nbsp; The bairns,
+that were bairns when I came among my people, were ripened unto
+parents, and a new generation was swelling in the bud around
+me.&nbsp; But it is what happened that I have to give an account
+of.</p>
+<p>This year the Lady Macadam&rsquo;s jointure-house that was,
+having been long without a tenant, a Mr. Cayenne and his family,
+American loyalists, came and took it, and settled among us for a
+time.&nbsp; His wife was a clever woman, and they had two
+daughters, Miss Virginia and Miss Carolina; but he was himself an
+ettercap, a perfect spunkie of passion, as ever was known in town
+or country.&nbsp; His wife had a terrible time o&rsquo;t with
+him, and yet the unhappy man had a great share of common sense,
+and, saving the exploits of his unmanageable temper, was an
+honest and creditable gentleman.&nbsp; Of his humour we soon had
+a sample, as I shall relate at length all about it.</p>
+<p>Shortly after he came to the parish, Mrs. Balwhidder and me
+waited upon the family to pay our respects, and Mr. Cayenne, in a
+free and hearty manner, insisted on us staying to dinner.&nbsp;
+His wife, I could see, was not satisfied with this, not being, as
+I discerned afterwards, prepared to give an entertainment to
+strangers; however, we fell into the misfortune of staying, and
+nothing could exceed the happiness of Mr. Cayenne.&nbsp; I
+thought him one of the blithest bodies I had ever seen, and had
+no notion that he was such a tap of tow as in the sequel he
+proved himself.</p>
+<p>As there was something extra to prepare, the dinner was a
+little longer of being on the table than usual, at which he began
+to fash, and every now and then took a turn up and down the room,
+with his hands behind his back, giving a short melancholious
+whistle.&nbsp; At length the dinner was served, but it was more
+scanty than he had expected, and this upset his good-humour
+altogether.&nbsp; Scarcely had I asked the blessing when he began
+to storm at his blackamoor servant, who was, however, used to his
+way, and did his work without minding him; but by some neglect
+there was no mustard down, which Mr. Cayenne called for in the
+voice of a tempest, and one of the servant lassies came in with
+the pot, trembling.&nbsp; It happened that, as it had not been
+used for a day or two before, the lid was clagged, and, as it
+were, glued in, so that Mr. Cayenne could not get it out, which
+put him quite wud, and he attempted to fling it at Sambo, the
+black lad&rsquo;s head, but it stottit against the wall, and the
+lid flying open, the whole mustard flew in his own face, which
+made him a sight not to be spoken of.&nbsp; However it calmed
+him; but really, as I had never seen such a man before, I could
+not but consider the accident as a providential reproof, and
+trembled to think what greater evil might fall out in the hands
+of a man so left to himself in the intemperance of passion.</p>
+<p>But the worst thing about Mr. Cayenne was his meddling with
+matters in which he had no concern; for he had a most irksome
+nature, and could not be at rest, so that he was truly a thorn in
+our side.&nbsp; Among other of his strange doings, was the part
+he took in the proceedings of the session, with which he had as
+little to do, in a manner, as the man in the moon; but having no
+business on his hands, he attended every sederunt, and from less
+to more, having no self-government, he began to give his opinion
+in our deliberations; and often bred us trouble, by causing
+strife to arise.</p>
+<p>It happened, as the time of the summer occasion was drawing
+near, that it behoved us to make arrangements about the
+assistance; and upon the suggestion of the elders, to which I
+paid always the greatest deference, I invited Mr. Keekie of
+Loupinton, who was a sound preacher, and a great expounder of the
+kittle parts of the Old Testament, being a man well versed in the
+Hebrew and etymologies, for which he was much reverenced by the
+old people that delighted to search the Scriptures.&nbsp; I had
+also written to Mr. Sprose of Annock, a preacher of another sort,
+being a vehement and powerful thresher of the word, making the
+chaff and vain babbling of corrupt commentators to fly from his
+hand.&nbsp; He was not, however, so well liked, as he wanted that
+connect method which is needful to the enforcing of
+doctrine.&nbsp; But he had never been among us, and it was
+thought it would be a godly treat to the parish to let the people
+hear him.&nbsp; Besides Mr. Sprose, Mr. Waikle of Gowanry, a
+quiet hewer out of the image of holiness in the heart, was
+likewise invited, all in addition to our old stoops from the
+adjacent parishes.</p>
+<p>None of these three preachers were in any estimation with Mr.
+Cayenne, who had only heard each of them once; and he, happening
+to be present in the session-house at the time, enquired how we
+had settled.&nbsp; I thought this not a very orderly question,
+but I gave him a civil answer, saying, that, Mr. Keekie of
+Loupinton would preach on the morning of the fast-day, Mr. Sprose
+of Annock in the afternoon, and Mr. Waikle of Gowanry on the
+Saturday.&nbsp; Never shall I or the elders, while the breath of
+life is in our bodies, forget the reply.&nbsp; Mr. Cayenne struck
+the table like a clap of thunder, and cried, &ldquo;Mr. Keekie of
+Loupinton, and Mr. Sprose of Annock, and Mr. Waikle of Gowanry,
+and all suck trash, may go to &mdash; and be &mdash;!&rdquo; and
+out of the house he bounced, like a hand-ball stotting on a
+stone.</p>
+<p>The elders and me were confounded, and for some time we could
+not speak, but looked at each other, doubtful if our ears heard
+aright.&nbsp; At long and length I came to myself; and, in the
+strength of God, took my place at the table, and said, this was
+an outrageous impiety not to be borne, which all the elders
+agreed to; and we thereupon came to a resolve, which I dictated
+myself, wherein we debarred Mr. Cayenne from ever after entering,
+unless summoned, the session-house, the which resolve we directed
+the session-clerk to send to him direct, and thus we vindicated
+the insulted privileges of the church.</p>
+<p>Mr. Cayenne had cooled before he got home, and our paper
+coming to him in his appeased blood, he immediately came to the
+manse, and made a contrite apology for his hasty temper, which I
+reported in due time and form, to the session, and there the
+matter ended.&nbsp; But here was an example plain to be seen of
+the truth of the old proverb, that as one door shuts another
+opens; for scarcely were we in quietness by the decease of that
+old light-headed woman, the Lady Macadam, till a full equivalent
+for her was given in this hot and fiery Mr. Cayenne.</p>
+<h2><a name="page166"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+166</span>CHAPTER XXVII<br />
+YEAR 1786</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">From</span> the day of my settlement, I
+had resolved, in order to win the affections of my people, and to
+promote unison among the heritors, to be of as little expense to
+the parish as possible; but by this time the manse had fallen
+into a sore state of decay&mdash;the doors were wormed on the
+hinges&mdash;the casements of the windows chattered all the
+winter, like the teeth of a person perishing with cold, so that
+we had no comfort in the house; by which, at the urgent
+instigations of Mrs. Balwhidder, I was obligated to represent our
+situation to the session.&nbsp; I would rather, having so much
+saved money in the bank, paid the needful repairs myself, than
+have done this, but she said it would be a rank injustice to our
+own family; and her father, Mr. Kibbock, who was very
+long-headed, with more than a common man&rsquo;s portion of
+understanding, pointed out to me, that, as my life was but in my
+lip, it would be a wrong thing towards whomsoever was ordained to
+be my successor, to use the heritors to the custom of the
+minister paying for the reparations of the manse, as it might
+happen he might not be so well able to afford it as me.&nbsp; So
+in a manner, by their persuasion, and the constraint of the
+justice of the case, I made a report of the infirmities both of
+doors and windows, as well as of the rotten state of the floors,
+which were constantly in want of cobbling.&nbsp; Over and above
+all, I told them of the sarking of the roof, which was as frush
+as a puddock-stool; insomuch, that in every blast some of the
+pins lost their grip, and the slates came hurling off.</p>
+<p>The heritors were accordingly convened, and, after some
+deliberation, they proposed that the house should be seen to, and
+whitewashed and painted; and I thought this might do, for I saw
+they were terrified at the expense of a thorough repair; but when
+I went home and repeated to Mrs. Balwhidder what had been said at
+the meeting, and my thankfulness at getting the heritors&rsquo;
+consent to do so much, she was excessively angry, and told me,
+that all the painting and whitewashing in the world would avail
+nothing, for that the house was as a sepulchre full of
+rottenness; and she sent for Mr. Kibbock, her father, to confer
+with him on the way of getting the matter put to rights.</p>
+<p>Mr. Kibbock came, and hearing of what had passed, pondered for
+some time, and then said, &ldquo;All was very right! the minister
+(meaning me) has just to get tradesmen to look at the house, and
+write out their opinion of what it needs.&nbsp; There will be
+plaster to mend; so, before painting, he will get a
+plasterer.&nbsp; There will be a slater wanted; he has just to
+get a slater&rsquo;s estimate, and a wright&rsquo;s, and so
+forth, and when all is done, he will lay them before the session
+and the heritors, who, no doubt, will direct the reparations to
+go forward.&rdquo;</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p168b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Roadman"
+title=
+"The Roadman"
+ src="images/p168s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>This was very pawkie, counselling, of Mr. Kibbock, and I did
+not see through it at the time, but did as he recommended, and
+took all the different estimates, when they came in, to the
+session.&nbsp; The elders commended my prudence exceedingly for
+so doing, before going to work; and one of them asked me what the
+amount of the whole would be, but I had not cast it up.&nbsp;
+Some of the heritors thought that a hundred pounds would be
+sufficient for the outlay; but judge of our consternation, when,
+in counting up all the sums of the different estimates together,
+we found them well on towards a thousand pounds.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;Better big a new house at once, than do this!&rdquo; cried
+all the elders, by which I then perceived the draughtiness of Mr.
+Kibbock&rsquo;s advice.&nbsp; Accordingly, another meeting of the
+heritors was summoned, and after a great deal of controversy, it
+was agreed that a new manse should be erected; and, shortly
+after, we contracted with Thomas Trowel, the mason to build one
+for six hundred pounds, with all the requisite appurtenances, by
+which a clear gain was saved to the parish, by the foresight of
+Mr. Kibbock, to the amount of nearly four hundred pounds.&nbsp;
+But the heritors did not mean to have allowed the sort of repair
+that his plan comprehended.&nbsp; He was, however, a far
+forecasting man; the like of him for natural parts not being in
+our country side; and nobody could get the whip-hand of him,
+either in a bargain or an improvement, when he once was sensible
+of the advantage.&nbsp; He was, indeed, a blessing to the shire,
+both by his example as a farmer, and by his sound and discreet
+advice in the contentions of his neighbours, being a man, as was
+a saying among the commonality, &ldquo;wiser than the law and the
+fifteen Lords of Edinburgh.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>The building of the new manse occasioned a heavy cess on the
+heritors, which made them overly ready to pick holes in the coats
+of me and the elders; so that, out of my forbearance and delicacy
+in time past, grew a lordliness on their part, that was an ill
+return for the years that I had endured no little inconveniency
+for their sake.&nbsp; It was not in my heart or principles to
+harm the hair of a dog; but when I discerned the austerity with
+which they were disposed to treat their minister, I bethought me
+that, for the preservation of what was due to the establishment
+and the upholding of the decent administration of religion, I
+ought to set my face against the sordid intolerance by which they
+were actuated.&nbsp; This notion I weighed well before divulging
+it to any person; but when I had assured myself as to the
+rectitude thereof, I rode over one day to Mr. Kibbock&rsquo;s,
+and broke my mind to him about claiming out of the teinds an
+augmentation of my stipend, not because I needed it, but in case,
+after me, some bare and hungry gorbie of the Lord should be sent
+upon the parish, in no such condition to plea with the heritors
+as I was.&nbsp; Mr. Kibbock highly approved of my intent; and by
+his help, after much tribulation, I got an augmentation both in
+glebe and income; and to mark my reason for what I did, I took
+upon me to keep and clothe the wives and orphans of the parish,
+who lost their breadwinners in the American war.&nbsp; But for
+all that, the heritors spoke of me as an avaricious Jew, and made
+the hard-won fruits of Mrs. Balwhidder&rsquo;s great thrift and
+good management a matter of reproach against me.&nbsp; Few of
+them would come to the church, but stayed away, to the detriment
+of their own souls hereafter, in order, as they thought, to
+punish me; so that, in the course of this year, there was a
+visible decay of the sense of religion among the better orders of
+the parish, and, as will be seen in the sequel, their evil
+example infected the minds of many of the rising generation.</p>
+<p>It was in this year that Mr. Cayenne bought the mailing of the
+Wheatrigs, but did not begin to build his house till the
+following spring; for being ill to please with a plan, he fell
+out with the builders, and on one occasion got into such a
+passion with Mr. Trowel, the mason, that he struck him a blow on
+the face, for which he was obligated to make atonement.&nbsp; It
+was thought the matter would have been carried before the Lords;
+but, by the mediation of Mr. Kibbock, with my helping hand, a
+reconciliation was brought about, Mr. Cayenne indemnifying the
+mason with a sum of money to say no more anent it; after which,
+he employed him to build his house, a thing that no man could
+have thought possible, who reflected on the enmity between
+them.</p>
+<h2><a name="page172"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+172</span>CHAPTER XXVIII<br />
+YEAR 1787</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">There</span> had been, as I have
+frequently observed, a visible improvement going on in the
+parish.&nbsp; From the time of the making of the toll-road, every
+new house that was built in the clachan was built along that
+road.&nbsp; Among other changes hereby caused, the Lady
+Macadam&rsquo;s jointure-house that was, which stood in a
+pleasant parterre, inclosed within a stone wall and an iron gate,
+having a pillar with a pineapple head on each side, came to be in
+the middle of the town.&nbsp; While Mr. Cayenne inhabited the
+same, it was maintained in good order; but on his flitting to his
+own new house on the Wheatrigs, the parterre was soon overrun
+with weeds, and it began to wear the look of a waste place.&nbsp;
+Robert Toddy, who then kept the change-house, and who had, from
+the lady&rsquo;s death, rented the coach-house for stabling, in
+this juncture thought of it for an inn; so he set his own house
+to Thomas Treddles the weaver, whose son, William, is now the
+great Glasgow manufacturer, that has cotton-mills and
+steam-engines, and took, &ldquo;the Place,&rdquo; as it was
+called, and had a fine sign, <span class="smcap">The
+Cross-Keys</span>, painted and put up in golden characters, by
+which it became one of the most noted inns anywhere to be seen;
+and the civility of Mrs. Toddy was commended by all
+strangers.&nbsp; But although this transmutation from a
+change-house to an inn was a vast amendment, in a manner, to the
+parish, there was little amendment of manners thereby; for the
+farmer lads began to hold dancings and other riotous proceedings
+there, and to bring, as it were, the evil practices of towns into
+the heart of the country.&nbsp; All sort of licence was allowed
+as to drink and hours; and the edifying example of Mr. Mutchkins
+and his pious family, was no longer held up to the imitation of
+the wayfaring man.</p>
+<p>Saving the mutation of &ldquo;the Place&rdquo; into an inn,
+nothing very remarkable happened in this year.&nbsp; We got into
+our new manse about the middle of March; but it was rather damp,
+being new plastered, and it caused me to have a severe attack of
+the rheumatics in the fall of the year.</p>
+<p>I should not, in my notations, forget to mark a new luxury
+that got in among the commonality at this time.&nbsp; By the
+opening of new roads, and the traffic thereon with carts and
+carriers, and by our young men that were sailors going to the
+Clyde, and sailing to Jamaica and the West Indies, heaps of sugar
+and coffee-beans were brought home, while many, among the
+kail-stocks and cabbages in their yards, had planted groset and
+berry bushes; which two things happening together, the fashion to
+make jam and jelly, which hitherto had been only known in the
+kitchens and confectionaries of the gentry, came to be introduced
+into the clachan.&nbsp; All this, however, was not without a
+plausible pretext; for it was found that jelly was an excellent
+medicine for a sore throat, and jam a remedy as good as London
+candy for a cough, or a cold, or a shortness of breath.&nbsp; I
+could not, however, say that this gave me so much concern as the
+smuggling trade, only it occasioned a great fasherie to Mrs.
+Balwhidder; for, in the berry time, there was no end to the
+borrowing of her brass-pan to make jelly and jam, till Mrs. Toddy
+of the Cross-Keys bought one, which, in its turn, came into
+request, and saved ours.</p>
+<p>It was in the Martinmas quarter of this year that I got the
+first payment of my augmentation.&nbsp; Having no desire to rip
+up old sores, I shall say no more anent it, the worst being
+anticipated in my chronicle of the last year; but there was a
+thing happened in the payment that occasioned a vexation at the
+time, of a very disagreeable nature.&nbsp; Daft Meg Gaffaw, who,
+from the tragical death of her mother, was a privileged subject,
+used to come to the manse on the Saturdays for a meal of meat;
+and so it fell out that as, by some neglect of mine, no steps had
+been taken to regulate the disposal of the victual that
+constituted the means of the augmentation, some of the heritors,
+in an ungracious temper, sent what they called the tithe-ball
+(the Lord knows it was not the fiftieth!) to the manse, where I
+had no place to put it.&nbsp; This fell out on a Saturday night,
+when I was busy with my sermon, thinking not of silver or gold,
+but of much better; so that I was greatly molested and disturbed
+thereby.&nbsp; Daft Meg, who sat by the kitchen chimley-lug,
+hearing a&rsquo;, said nothing for a time; but when she saw how
+Mrs. Balwhidder and me were put to, she cried out with a loud
+voice, like a soul under the inspiration of
+prophecy&mdash;&ldquo;When the widow&rsquo;s cruse had filled all
+the vessels in the house, the Lord stopped the increase.&nbsp;
+Verily, verily, I say unto you, if your barns be filled, and your
+girnell-kists can hold no more, seek till ye shall find the tume
+basins of the poor, and therein pour the corn, and the oil, and
+the wine of your abundance; so shall ye be blessed of the
+Lord.&rdquo;&nbsp; The which words I took for an admonition, and
+directing the sacks to be brought into the dining-room and other
+chambers of the manse, I sent off the heritors&rsquo; servants,
+that had done me this prejudice, with an unexpected
+thankfulness.&nbsp; But this, as I afterwards was informed, both
+them and their masters attributed to the greedy grasp of avarice,
+with which they considered me as misled; and having said so,
+nothing could exceed their mortification on Monday, when they
+heard (for they were of those who had deserted the kirk) that I
+had given by the precentor notice to every widow in the parish
+that was in need, to come to the manse and she would receive her
+portion of the partitioning of the augmentation.&nbsp; Thus,
+without any offence on my part, saving the strictness of justice,
+was a division made between me and the heritors; but the people
+were with me; and my own conscience was with me; and though the
+fronts of the lofts and the pews of the heritors were but thinly
+filled, I trusted that a good time was coming, when the gentry
+would see the error of their way.&nbsp; So I bent the head of
+resignation to the Lord, and, assisted by the wisdom of Mr.
+Kibbock, adhered to the course I had adopted; but at the close of
+the year my heart was sorrowful for the schism; and my prayer on
+Hogmanay was one of great bitterness of soul, that such an evil
+had come to pass.</p>
+<h2><a name="page177"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+177</span>CHAPTER XXIX<br />
+YEAR 1788</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> had been often remarked by
+ingenious men, that the Brawl burn, which ran through the parish,
+though a small, was yet a rapid stream, and had a wonderful
+capability for damming, and to turn mills.&nbsp; From the time
+that the Irville water deserted its channel this brook grew into
+repute, and several mills and dams had been erected on its
+course.&nbsp; In this year a proposal came from Glasgow to build
+a cotton-mill on its banks, beneath the Witch-linn, which being
+on a corner of the Wheatrig, the property of Mr. Cayenne, he not
+only consented thereto, but took a part in the profit or loss
+therein; and, being a man of great activity, though we thought
+him, for many a day, a serpent-plague sent upon the parish, he
+proved thereby one of our greatest benefactors.&nbsp; The
+cotton-mill was built, and a spacious fabric it was&mdash;nothing
+like it had been seen before in our day and generation&mdash;and,
+for the people that were brought to work in it, a new town was
+built in the vicinity, which Mr. Cayenne, the same being founded
+on his land, called Cayenneville, the name of the plantation in
+Virginia that had been taken from him by the rebellious
+Americans.&nbsp; From that day Fortune was lavish of her favours
+upon him; his property swelled, and grew in the most
+extraordinary manner, and the whole country side was stirring
+with a new life.&nbsp; For, when the mill was set a-going, he got
+weavers of muslin established in Cayenneville; and shortly after,
+but that did not take place till the year following, he brought
+women all the way from the neighbourhood of Manchester, in
+England, to teach the lassie bairns in our old clachan
+tambouring.</p>
+<p>Some of the ancient families, in their turreted houses, were
+not pleased with this innovation, especially when they saw the
+handsome dwellings that were built for the weavers of the mills,
+and the unstinted hand that supplied the wealth required for the
+carrying on of the business.&nbsp; It sank their pride into
+insignificance, and many of them would almost rather have wanted
+the rise that took place in the value of their lands, than have
+seen this incoming of what they called o&rsquo;er-sea
+speculation.&nbsp; But, saving the building of the cotton-mill,
+and the beginning of Cayenneville, nothing more memorable
+happened in this year, still it was nevertheless a year of a
+great activity.&nbsp; The minds of men were excited to new
+enterprises; a new genius, as it were, had descended upon the
+earth, and there was an erect and outlooking spirit abroad that
+was not to be satisfied with the taciturn regularity of ancient
+affairs.&nbsp; Even Miss Sabrina Hooky, the schoolmistress,
+though now waned from her meridian, was touched with the
+enlivening rod, and set herself to learn and to teach tambouring,
+in such a manner as to supersede by precept and example that old
+time-honoured functionary, as she herself called it, the
+spinning-wheel, proving, as she did one night to Mr. Kibbock and
+me, that, if more money could be made by a woman tambouring than
+by spinning, it was better for her to tambour than to spin.</p>
+<p>But, in the midst of all this commercing and manufacturing, I
+began to discover signs of decay in the wonted simplicity of our
+country ways.&nbsp; Among the cotton-spinners and muslin weavers
+of Cayenneville were several unsatisfied and ambitious spirits,
+who clubbed together, and got a London newspaper to the
+Cross-Keys, where they were nightly in the habit of meeting and
+debating about the affairs of the French, which were then
+gathering towards a head.&nbsp; They were represented to me as
+lads by common in capacity, but with unsettled notions of
+religion.&nbsp; They were, however, quiet and orderly; and some
+of them since, at Glasgow, Paisley, and Manchester, even, I am
+told, in London, have grown into a topping way.</p>
+<p>It seems they did not like my manner of preaching, and on that
+account absented themselves from public worship; which, when I
+heard, I sent for some of them, to convince them of their error
+with regard to the truth of divers points of doctrine; but they
+confounded me with their objections, and used my arguments, which
+were the old and orthodox proven opinions of the Divinity Hall,
+as if they had been the light sayings of a vain man.&nbsp; So
+that I was troubled, fearing that some change would ensue to my
+people, who had hitherto lived amidst the boughs and branches of
+the gospel unmolested by the fowler&rsquo;s snare, and I set
+myself to watch narrowly, and with a vigilant eye, what would
+come to pass.</p>
+<p>There was a visible increase among us of worldly prosperity in
+the course of this year; insomuch that some of the farmers, who
+were in the custom of taking their vendibles to the neighbouring
+towns on the Tuesdays, the Wednesdays, and Fridays, were led to
+open a market on the Saturdays in our own clachan, the which
+proved a great convenience.&nbsp; But I cannot take it upon me to
+say, whether this can be said to have well begun in the present
+Ann. Dom., although I know that in the summer of the ensuing year
+it was grown into a settled custom; which I well recollect by the
+Macadams coming with their bairns to see Mrs. Malcolm, their
+mother, suddenly on a Saturday afternoon; on which occasion me
+and Mrs. Balwhidder were invited to dine with them, and Mrs.
+Malcolm bought in the market for the dinner that day, both mutton
+and fowls, such as twenty years before could not have been got
+for love or money on such a pinch.&nbsp; Besides, she had two
+bottles of red and white wine from the Cross-Keys, luxuries
+which, saving in the Breadland House in its best days, could not
+have been had in the whole parish, but must have been brought
+from a borough town; for Eaglesham Castle is not within the
+bounds of Dalmailing, and my observe does not apply to the stock
+and stores of that honourable mansion, but only to the dwellings
+of our own heritors, who were in general straitened in their
+circumstances, partly with upsetting, and partly by the eating
+rust of family pride, which hurt the edge of many a clever fellow
+among them, that would have done well in the way of trade, but
+sunk into divors for the sake of their genteelity.</p>
+<h2><a name="page182"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+182</span>CHAPTER XXX<br />
+YEAR 1789</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> I have always reflected upon
+as one of our blessed years.&nbsp; It was not remarkable for any
+extraordinary occurrence; but there was a hopefulness in the
+minds of men, and a planning of new undertakings, of which,
+whatever may be the upshot, the devising is ever rich in the
+cheerful anticipations of good.</p>
+<p>Another new line of road was planned, for a shorter cut to the
+cotton-mill, from the main road to Glasgow, and a public-house
+was opened in Cayenneville: the latter, however, was not an event
+that gave me much satisfaction; but it was a convenience to the
+inhabitants, and the carriers that brought the cotton-bags and
+took away the yarn twice a-week, needed a place of
+refreshment.&nbsp; And there was a stage-coach set up thrice
+every week from Ayr, that passed through the town, by which it
+was possible to travel to Glasgow between breakfast and dinner
+time, a thing that could not, when I came to the parish, have
+been thought within the compass of man.</p>
+<p>This stage-coach I thought one of the greatest conveniences
+that had been established among us; and it enabled Mrs.
+Balwhidder to send a basket of her fresh butter into the Glasgow
+market, by which, in the spring and the fall of the year, she got
+a great price; for the Glasgow merchants are fond of excellent
+eatables, and the payment was aye ready money&mdash;Tam Whirlit
+the driver paying for the one basket when he took up the
+other.</p>
+<p>In this year William Malcolm, the youngest son of the widow,
+having been some time a tutor in a family in the east country,
+came to see his mother, as indeed he had done every year from the
+time he went to the college; but this occasion was made
+remarkable by his preaching in my pulpit.&nbsp; His old
+acquaintance were curious to hear him; and I myself had a sort of
+a wish likewise, being desirous to know how far he was orthodox;
+so I thought fit, on the suggestion of one of the elders, to ask
+him to preach one day for me, which, after some fleeching, he
+consented to do.&nbsp; I think, however, there was a true modesty
+in his diffidence, although his reason was a weak one, being lest
+he might not satisfy his mother, who had as yet never heard
+him.&nbsp; Accordingly, on the Sabbath after, he did preach, and
+the kirk was well packed, and I was not one of the least
+attentive of the congregation.&nbsp; His sermon assuredly was
+well put together and there was nothing to object to in his
+doctrine; but the elderly people thought his language rather too
+Englified, which I thought likewise; for I never could abide that
+the plain auld Kirk of Scotland, with her sober presbyterian
+simplicity, should borrow, either in word or in deed, from the
+language of the prelatic hierarchy of England.&nbsp;
+Nevertheless, the younger part of the congregation were loud in
+his praise, saying, there had not been heard before such a style
+of language in our side of the country.&nbsp; As for Mrs.
+Malcolm, his mother, when I spoke to her anent the same, she said
+but little, expressing only her hope that his example would be
+worthy of his precepts; so that, upon the whole, it was a
+satisfaction to us all, that he was likely to prove a stoop and
+upholding pillar to the Kirk of Scotland.&nbsp; And his mother
+had the satisfaction, before she died, to see him a placed
+minister, and his name among the authors of his country; for he
+published at Edinburgh a volume of Moral Essays, of which he sent
+me a pretty bound copy, and they were greatly creditable to his
+pen, though lacking somewhat of that birr and smeddum that is the
+juice and flavour of books of that sort.</p>
+<h2><a name="page185"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+185</span>CHAPTER XXXI<br />
+YEAR 1790</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> features of this Ann. Dom.
+partook of the character of its predecessor.&nbsp; Several new
+houses were added to the clachan; Cayenneville was spreading out
+with weavers&rsquo; shops, and growing up fast into a town.&nbsp;
+In some respects it got the start of ours; for one day, when I
+was going to dine with Mr. Cayenne at Wheatrig House, not a
+little to my amazement, did I behold a bookseller&rsquo;s shop
+opened there, with sticks of red and black wax, pouncet-boxes,
+pens, pocket-books, and new publications, in the window, such as
+the like of was only to be seen in cities and borough
+towns.&nbsp; And it was lighted at night by a patent lamp, which
+shed a wonderful beam, burning oil, and having no smoke.&nbsp;
+The man sold likewise perfumery, powder-puffs, trinkets, and
+Dublin dolls, besides penknives, Castile soap, and
+walking-sticks, together with a prodigy of other luxuries too
+tedious to mention.</p>
+<p>Upon conversing with the man, for I was enchanted to go into
+this phenomenon, for as no less could I regard it, he told me
+that he had a correspondence with London, and could get me down
+any book published there within the same month in which it came
+out; and he showed me divers of the newest come out, of which I
+did not read even in the <i>Scots Magazine</i> till more than
+three months after, although I had till then always considered
+that work as most interesting for its early intelligence.&nbsp;
+But what I was most surprised to hear, was, that he took in a
+daily London newspaper for the spinners and weavers, who paid him
+a penny a-week a-piece for the same; they being all greatly taken
+up with what, at the time, was going on in France.</p>
+<p>This bookseller in the end, however, proved a whawp in our
+nest, for he was in league with some of the English reformers;
+and when the story took wind three years after, concerning the
+plots and treasons of the corresponding societies and democrats,
+he was fain to make a moonlight flitting, leaving his wife for a
+time to manage his affairs.&nbsp; I could not, however, think any
+ill of the man notwithstanding; for he had very correct notions
+of right and justice, in a political sense, and when he came into
+the parish he was as orderly and well-behaved as any other body;
+and conduct is a test that I have always found as good for a
+man&rsquo;s principles as professions.&nbsp; Nor, at the time of
+which I am speaking, was there any of that dread or fear of
+reforming the government that has since been occasioned by the
+wild and wasteful hand which the French employed in their
+revolution.</p>
+<p>But, among other improvements, I should mention that a Doctor
+Marigold came and settled in Cayenneville, a small, round,
+happy-tempered man, whose funny stories were far better liked
+than his drugs.&nbsp; There was a doubt among some of the weavers
+if he was a skilful Esculapian; and this doubt led to their
+holding out an inducement to another medical man, Dr. Tanzey, to
+settle there likewise, by which it grew into a saying, that at
+Cayenneville there was a doctor for health as well as sickness;
+for Dr. Marigold was one of the best hands in the country at a
+pleasant punch-bowl, while Dr. Tanzey had all the requisite
+knowledge for the faculty for the bedside.</p>
+<p>It was in this year that the hour-plate and hand on the kirk
+steeple were renewed, as indeed, may yet be seen by the date,
+though it be again greatly in want of fresh gilding; for it was
+by my advice that the figures of the Ann. Dom. were placed one in
+each corner.&nbsp; In this year, likewise, the bridge over the
+Brawl burn was built&mdash;a great convenience, in the winter
+time, to the parishioners that lived on the north side; for when
+there happened to be a spait on the Sunday, it kept them from the
+kirk; but I did not find that the bridge mended the matter, till
+after the conclusion of the war against the democrats, and the
+beginning of that which we are now waging with Boney, their child
+and champion.&nbsp; It is, indeed, wonderful to think of the
+occultation of grace that was taking place about this time,
+throughout the whole bound of Christendom; for I could mark a
+visible darkness of infidelity spreading in the corner of the
+vineyard committed to my keeping, and a falling away of the vines
+from their wonted props and confidence in the truths of
+Revelation.&nbsp; But I said nothing.&nbsp; I knew that the faith
+could not be lost, and that it would be found purer and purer the
+more it was tried; and this I have lived to see, many now being
+zealous members of the church, that were abundantly lukewarm at
+the period of which I am now speaking.</p>
+<h2><a name="page189"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+189</span>CHAPTER XXXII<br />
+YEAR 1791</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">In</span> the spring of this year, I took
+my son Gilbert into Glasgow, to place him in a
+counting-house.&nbsp; As he had no inclination for any of the
+learned professions, and not having been there from the time when
+I was sent to the General Assembly, I cannot express my
+astonishment at the great improvements, surpassing far all that
+was done in our part of the country, which I thought was not to
+be paralleled.&nbsp; When I came afterwards to reflect on my
+simplicity in this, it was clear to me that we should not judge
+of the rest of the world by what we see going on around
+ourselves, but walk abroad into other parts, and thereby enlarge
+our sphere of observation, as well as ripen our judgment of
+things.</p>
+<p>But although there was no doubt a great and visible increase
+of the city, loftier buildings on all sides, and streets that
+spread their arms far into the embraces of the country, I thought
+the looks of the population were impaired, and that there was a
+greater proportion of long white faces in the Trongate, than when
+I attended the Divinity class.&nbsp; These, I was told, were the
+weavers and others concerned in the cotton trade, which I could
+well believe, for they were very like in their looks to the men
+of Cayenneville; but from living in a crowded town, and not
+breathing a wholesome country air between their tasks, they had a
+stronger cast of unhealthy melancholy.&nbsp; I was therefore very
+glad that Providence had placed in my hand the pastoral staff of
+a country parish; for it cut me to the heart to see so many young
+men, in the rising prime of life, already in the arms of a pale
+consumption.&nbsp; &ldquo;If, therefore,&rdquo; said I to Mrs.
+Balwhidder, when I returned home to the manse, &ldquo;we live, as
+it were, within the narrow circle of ignorance, we are spared
+from the pain of knowing many an evil; and, surely, in much
+knowledge there is sadness of heart.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>But the main effect of this was to make me do all in my power
+to keep my people contented with their lowly estate; for in that
+same spirit of improvement, which was so busy every where, I
+could discern something like a shadow, that showed it was not
+altogether of that pure advantage which avarice led all so
+eagerly to believe.&nbsp; Accordingly, I began a series of
+sermons on the evil and vanity of riches, and, for the most part
+of the year, pointed out in what manner they led the possessor to
+indulge in sinful luxuries, and how indulgence begat desire, and
+desire betrayed integrity and corrupted the heart; making it
+evident that the rich man was liable to forget his unmerited
+obligations to God, and to oppress the laborious and the needful
+when he required their services.</p>
+<p>Little did I imagine, in thus striving to keep aloof the
+ravenous wolf Ambition from my guileless flock, that I was giving
+cause for many to think me an enemy to the king and government,
+and a perverter of Christianity, to suit levelling
+doctrines.&nbsp; But so it was.&nbsp; Many of the heritors
+considered me a blackneb, though I knew it not, but went on in
+the course of my duty, thinking only how best to preserve peace
+on earth and goodwill towards men.&nbsp; I saw, however, an
+altered manner in the deportment of several, with whom I had long
+lived in friendly terms.&nbsp; It was not marked enough to make
+me inquire the cause, but sufficiently plain to affect my ease of
+mind.&nbsp; Accordingly, about the end of this year, I fell into
+a dull way: my spirit was subdued, and at times I was aweary of
+the day, and longed for the night, when I might close my eyes in
+peaceful slumbers.&nbsp; I missed my son Gilbert, who had been a
+companion to me in the long nights, while his mother was busy
+with the lasses, and their ceaseless wheels and cardings, in the
+kitchen.&nbsp; Often could I have found it in my heart to have
+banned that never-ceasing industry, and to tell Mrs. Balwhidder,
+that the married state was made for something else than to make
+napery and beetle blankets; but it was her happiness to keep all
+at work, and she had no pleasure in any other way of life, so I
+sat many a night by the fireside with resignation; sometimes in
+the study, and sometimes in the parlour, and, as I was doing
+nothing, Mrs. Balwhidder said it was needless to light the
+candle.&nbsp; Our daughter Janet was in this time at a
+boarding-school in Ayr, so that I was really a most solitary
+married man.</p>
+<h2><a name="page192"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+192</span>CHAPTER XXXIII<br />
+YEAR 1792</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> the spring in this year began
+to brighten on the brae, the cloud of dulness that had darkened
+and oppressed me all the winter somewhat melted away, and I could
+now and then joke again at the never-ending toil and trouble of
+that busiest of all bees, the second Mrs. Balwhidder.&nbsp; But
+still I was far from being right: a small matter affected me, and
+I was overly given to walking by myself, and musing on things
+that I could tell nothing about&mdash;my thoughts were just the
+rack of a dream without form, and driving witlessly as the smoke
+that mounteth up, and is lost in the airy heights of the sky.</p>
+<p>Heeding little of what was going on in the clachan, and taking
+no interest in the concerns of any body, I would have been
+contented to die, but I had no ail about me.&nbsp; An accident,
+however, fell out, that, by calling on me for an effort, had the
+blessed influence of clearing my vapours almost entirely
+away.</p>
+<p>One morning as I was walking on the sunny side of the road,
+where the footpath was in the next year made to the cotton-mill,
+I fell in with Mr. Cayenne, who was seemingly much fashed&mdash;a
+small matter could do that at any time; and he came up to me with
+a red face and an angry eye.&nbsp; It was not my intent to speak
+to him; for I was grown loth to enter into conversation with any
+body, so I bowed and passed on.&nbsp; &ldquo;What,&rdquo; cried
+Mr. Cayenne, &ldquo;and will you not speak to me?&rdquo;&nbsp; I
+turned round, and said meekly, &ldquo;Mr. Cayenne, I have no
+objections to speak to you; but having nothing particular to say,
+it did not seem necessary just now.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>He looked at me like a gled, and in a minute exclaimed,
+&ldquo;Mad, by Jupiter! as mad as a March hare!&rdquo;&nbsp; He
+then entered into conversation with me, and said, that he had
+noticed me an altered man, and was just so far on his way to the
+manse, to enquire what had befallen me.&nbsp; So, from less to
+more, we entered into the marrow of my case; and I told him how I
+had observed the estranged countenances of some of the heritors;
+at which he swore an oath, that they were a parcel of the
+damn&rsquo;dest boobies in the country, and told me how they had
+taken it into their heads that I was a leveller.&nbsp; &ldquo;But
+I know you better,&rdquo; said Mr. Cayenne, &ldquo;and have stood
+up for you as an honest conscientious man, though I don&rsquo;t
+much like your humdrum preaching.&nbsp; However, let that pass; I
+insist upon your dining with me to-day, when some of these arrant
+fools are to be with us, and the devil&rsquo;s in&rsquo;t if I
+don&rsquo;t make you friends with them.&rdquo;&nbsp; I did not
+think Mr. Cayenne, however, very well qualified for peacemaker,
+but, nevertheless, I consented to go; and having thus got an
+inkling of the cause of that cold back-turning which had
+distressed me so much, I made such an effort to remove the error
+that was entertained against me, that some of the heritors,
+before we separated, shook me by the hands with the cordiality of
+renewed friendship; and, as if to make amends for past neglect,
+there was no end to their invitations to dinner which had the
+effect of putting me again on my mettle, and removing the thick
+and muddy melancholious humour out of my blood.</p>
+<p>But what confirmed my cure was the coming home of my daughter
+Janet from the Ayr boarding-school, where she had learnt to play
+on the spinnet, and was become a conversible lassie, with a
+competent knowledge, for a woman of geography and history; so
+that when her mother was busy with the weariful booming wheel,
+she entertained me sometimes with a tune, and sometimes with her
+tongue, which made the winter nights fly cantily by.</p>
+<p>Whether it was owing to the malady of my imagination
+throughout the greatest part of this year, or that really nothing
+particular did happen to interest me, I cannot say; but it is
+very remarkable that I have nothing remarkable to
+record&mdash;further, than I was at the expense myself of getting
+the manse rough-case, and the window cheeks painted, with roans
+put up, rather than apply to the heritors; for they were always
+sorely fashed when called upon for outlay.</p>
+<h2><a name="page196"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+196</span>CHAPTER XXXIV<br />
+YEAR 1793</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">On</span> the first night of this year I
+dreamt a very remarkable dream, which, when I now recall to mind
+at this distance of time, I cannot but think that there was a
+case of prophecy in it.&nbsp; I thought that I stood on the tower
+of an old popish kirk, looking out at the window upon the
+kirkyard, where I beheld ancient tombs, with effigies and
+coats-of-arms on the wall thereof, and a great gate at the one
+side, and a door that led into a dark and dismal vault at the
+other.&nbsp; I thought all the dead that were lying in the common
+graves, rose out of their coffins; at the same time, from the old
+and grand monuments, with the effigies and coats-of-arms, came
+the great men, and the kings of the earth with crowns on their
+heads, and globes and sceptres in their hands.</p>
+<p>I stood wondering what was to ensue, when presently I heard
+the noise of drums and trumpets, and anon I beheld an army with
+banners entering in at the gate; upon which the kings and the
+great men came also forth in their power and array, and a
+dreadful battle was foughten; but the multitude that had risen
+from the common graves, stood afar off, and were but
+lookers-on.</p>
+<p>The kings and their host were utterly discomfited.&nbsp; They
+were driven within the doors of their monuments, their
+coats-of-arms were broken off, and their effigies cast down, and
+the victors triumphed over them with the flourishes of trumpets
+and the waving of banners.&nbsp; But while I looked, the vision
+was changed, and I then beheld a wide and a dreary waste, and
+afar off the steeples of a great city, and a tower in the midst,
+like the tower of Babel, and on it I could discern, written in
+characters of fire, &ldquo;Public Opinion.&rdquo;&nbsp; While I
+was pondering at the same, I heard a great shout, and presently
+the conquerors made their appearance, coming over the desolate
+moor.&nbsp; They were going in great pride and might towards the
+city; but an awful burning rose, afar as it were in the darkness,
+and the flames stood like a tower of fire that reached unto the
+heavens.&nbsp; And I saw a dreadful hand and an arm stretched
+from out of the cloud, and in its hold was a besom made of the
+hail and the storm, and it swept the fugitives like dust; and in
+their place I saw the churchyard, as it were, cleared and spread
+around, the graves closed, and the ancient tombs, with their
+coats-of-arms and their effigies of stone, all as they were in
+the beginning.&nbsp; I then awoke, and behold it was a dream.</p>
+<p>This vision perplexed me for many days, and when the news came
+that the King of France was beheaded by the hands of his people,
+I received, as it were, a token in confirmation of the vision
+that had been disclosed to me in my sleep, and I preached a
+discourse on the same, and against the French Revolution, that
+was thought one of the greatest and soundest sermons that I had
+ever delivered in my pulpit.</p>
+<p>On the Monday following, Mr. Cayenne, who had been some time
+before appointed a justice of the peace, came over from Wheatrig
+House to the Cross-Keys, where he sent for me and divers other
+respectable inhabitants of the clachan, and told us that he was
+to have a sad business, for a warrant was out to bring before him
+two democratical weaver lads, on a suspicion of high
+treason.&nbsp; Scarcely were the words uttered when they were
+brought in, and he began to ask them how they dared to think of
+dividing, with their liberty and equality of principles, his and
+every other man&rsquo;s property in the country.&nbsp; The men
+answered him in a calm manner, and told him they sought no
+man&rsquo;s property, but only their own natural rights; upon
+which he called them traitors and reformers.&nbsp; They denied
+they were traitors, but confessed they were reformers, and said
+they knew not how that should be imputed to them as a fault, for
+that the greatest men of all times had been
+reformers,&mdash;&ldquo;Was not,&rdquo; they said, &ldquo;our
+Lord Jesus Christ a reformer?&rdquo;&mdash;&ldquo;And what the
+devil did he make of it?&rdquo; cried Mr. Cayenne, bursting with
+passion; &ldquo;Was he not crucified?&rdquo;</p>
+<p>I thought, when I heard these words, that the pillars of the
+earth sank beneath me, and that the roof of the house was carried
+away in a whirlwind.&nbsp; The drums of my ears crackit, blue
+starns danced before my sight, and I was fain to leave the house
+and hie me home to the manse, where I sat down in my study, like
+a stupified creature, awaiting what would betide.&nbsp; Nothing,
+however, was found against the weaver lads; but I never from that
+day could look on Mr. Cayenne as a Christian, though surely he
+was a true government-man.</p>
+<p>Soon after this affair, there was a pleasant re-edification of
+a gospel-spirit among the heritors, especially when they heard
+how I had handled the regicides in France; and on the following
+Sunday, I had the comfortable satisfaction to see many a
+gentleman in their pews, that had not been for years within a
+kirk-door.&nbsp; The democrats, who took a world of trouble to
+misrepresent the actions of the gentry, insinuated that all this
+was not from any new sense of grace, but in fear of their being
+reported as suspected persons to the king&rsquo;s
+government.&nbsp; But I could not think so, and considered their
+renewal of communion with the church as a swearing of allegiance
+to the King of kings, against that host of French atheists, who
+had torn the mortcloth from the coffin, and made it a banner,
+with which they were gone forth to war against the Lamb.&nbsp;
+The whole year was, however, spent in great uneasiness, and the
+proclamation of the war was followed by an appalling stop in
+trade.&nbsp; We heard of nothing but failures on all hands; and
+among others that grieved me, was that of Mr. Maitland of
+Glasgow, who had befriended Mrs. Malcolm in the days of her
+affliction, and gave her son Robert his fine ship.&nbsp; It was a
+sore thing to hear of so many breakings, especially of old
+respected merchants like him, who had been a Lord Provost, and
+was far declined into the afternoon of life.&nbsp; He did not,
+however, long survive the mutation of his fortune; but bending
+his aged head in sorrow, sank down beneath the stroke, to rise no
+more.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p200b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Minister&rsquo;s Daughter"
+title=
+"The Minister&rsquo;s Daughter"
+ src="images/p200s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<h2><a name="page201"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+201</span>CHAPTER XXXV<br />
+YEAR 1794</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> year had opened into all the
+leafiness of midsummer before anything memorable happened in the
+parish, further than that the sad division of my people into
+government-men and jacobins was perfected.&nbsp; This calamity,
+for I never could consider such heartburning among neighbours as
+any thing less than a very heavy calamity, was assuredly
+occasioned by faults on both sides; but it must be confessed that
+the gentry did nothing to win the commonality from the errors of
+their way.&nbsp; A little more condescension on their part would
+not have made things worse, and might have made them better; but
+pride interposed, and caused them to think that any show of
+affability from them would be construed by the democrats into a
+terror of their power; while the democrats were no less to blame;
+for hearing how their compeers were thriving in France, and
+demolishing every obstacle to their ascendency, they were crouse
+and really insolent, evidencing none of that temperance in
+prosperity that proves the possessors worthy of their good
+fortune.</p>
+<p>As for me, my duty in these circumstances was plain and
+simple.&nbsp; The Christian religion was attempted to be brought
+into disrepute; the rising generation were taught to gibe at its
+holiest ordinances; and the kirk was more frequented as a place
+to while away the time on a rainy Sunday, than for any insight of
+the admonitions and revelations in the sacred book.&nbsp; Knowing
+this, I perceived that it would be of no effect to handle much
+the mysteries of the faith; but as there was at the time a bruit
+and a sound about universal benevolence, philanthropy, utility,
+and all the other disguises with which an infidel philosophy
+appropriated to itself the charity, brotherly love, and welldoing
+inculcated by our holy religion, I set myself to task upon these
+heads, and thought it no robbery to use a little of the stratagem
+employed against Christ&rsquo;s kingdom, to promote the interests
+thereof in the hearts and understandings of those whose ears
+would have been sealed against me, had I attempted to expound
+higher things.&nbsp; Accordingly, on one day it was my practice
+to show what the nature of Christian charity was, comparing it to
+the light and warmth of the sun, that shines impartially on the
+just and the unjust&mdash;showing that man, without the sense of
+it as a duty, was as the beasts that perish, and that every
+feeling of his nature was intimately selfish, but then when
+actuated by this divine impulse, he rose out of himself, and
+became as a god, zealous to abate the sufferings of all things
+that live; and, on the next day, I demonstrated that the new
+benevolence which had come so much into vogue, was but another
+version of this Christian virtue.&nbsp; In like manner, I dealt
+with brotherly love, bringing it home to the business and bosoms
+of my hearers, that the Christianity of it was neither enlarged
+nor bettered by being baptized with the Greek name of
+philanthropy.&nbsp; With welldoing, however, I went more roundly
+to work, I told my people that I thought they had more sense than
+to secede from Christianity to become Utilitarians; for that it
+would be a confession of ignorance of the faith they deserved,
+seeing that it was the main duty inculcated by our religion to do
+all in morals and manners to which the newfangled doctrine of
+utility pretended.</p>
+<p>These discourses, which I continued for sometime, had no great
+effect on the men; but being prepared in a familiar household
+manner, they took the fancies of the young women, which was to me
+an assurance that the seed I had planted would in time shoot
+forth; for I reasoned with myself, that if the gudeman of the
+immediate generation should continue free-thinkers, their wives
+will take care that those of the next shall not lack that spunk
+of grace; so I was cheered under that obscurity which fell upon
+Christianity at this time, with a vista beyond, in which I saw,
+as it were, the children unborn, walking on the bright green, and
+in the unclouded splendour of the faith.</p>
+<p>But what with the decay of trade, and the temptation of the
+king&rsquo;s bounty, and, over all, the witlessness that was in
+the spirit of man at this time, the number that enlisted in the
+course for the year from the parish was prodigious.&nbsp; In one
+week no less than three weavers and two cotton-spinners went over
+to Ayr, and took the bounty of the Royal Artillery.&nbsp; But I
+could not help remarking to myself, that the people were grown so
+used to changes and extraordinary adventures, that the single
+enlistment of Thomas Wilson, at the beginning of the American
+war, occasioned a far greater grief and work among us, than all
+the swarms that went off week after week in the months of
+November and December of this year.</p>
+<h2><a name="page205"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+205</span>CHAPTER XXXVI<br />
+YEAR 1795</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> present Ann. Dom. was ushered
+in with an event that I had never dreaded to see in my day, in
+our once sober and religious country parish.&nbsp; The number of
+lads that had gone over to Ayr to be soldiers from among the
+spinners and weavers of Cayenneville had been so great, that the
+government got note of it, and sent a recruiting party to be
+quartered in the town; for the term clachan was beginning by this
+time to wear out of fashion: indeed, the place itself was
+outgrowing the fitness of that title.&nbsp; Never shall I forget
+the dunt that the first tap of the drum gied to my heart, as I
+was sitting on Hansel Monday by myself at the parlour fireside,
+Mrs. Balwhidder being throng with the lassies looking out a
+washing, and my daughter at Ayr, spending a few days with her old
+comrades of the boarding school.&nbsp; I thought it was the
+enemy; and then anon the sound of the fife came shrill to the
+ear, for the night was lown and peaceful.&nbsp; My wife and all
+the lassies came flying in upon me, crying all in the name of
+heaven, what could it be? by which I was obligated to put on my
+big-coat, and, with my hat and staff, go out to enquire.&nbsp;
+The whole town was aloof, the aged at the doors in clusters, and
+the bairns following the tattoo, as it was called, and at every
+doubling beat of the drum, shouting as if they had been in the
+face of their foemen.</p>
+<p>Mr. Archibald Dozendale, one of my elders, was saying to
+several persons around him, just as I came up, &ldquo;Hech, sirs!
+but the battle draws near our gates,&rdquo; upon which there was
+a heavy sigh from all that heard him; and then they told me of
+the sergeant&rsquo;s business; and we had a serious communing
+together anent the same.&nbsp; But while we were thus standing
+discoursing on the causey, Mrs. Balwhidder and the servant
+lassies could thole no longer, but in a troop came in quest of
+me, to hear what was doing.&nbsp; In short, it was a night both
+of sorrow and anxiety.&nbsp; Mr. Dozendale walked back to the
+manse with us, and we had a sober tumbler of toddy together;
+marvelling exceedingly where these fearful portents and changes
+would stop, both of us being of opinion that the end of the world
+was drawing nearer and nearer.</p>
+<p>Whether it was, however, that the lads belonging to the place
+did not like to show themselves with the enlistment cockades
+among their acquaintance, or that there was any other reason, I
+cannot take it upon me to say; but certain it is, the recruiting
+party came no speed, and, in consequence, were removed about the
+end of March.</p>
+<p>Another thing happened in this year, too remarkable for me to
+neglect to put on record, as it strangely and strikingly marked
+the rapid revolutions that were going on.&nbsp; In the month of
+August at the time of the fair, a gang of playactors came, and
+hired Thomas Thacklan&rsquo;s barn for their enactments.&nbsp;
+They were the first of that clanjamfrey who had ever been in the
+parish; and there was a wonderful excitement caused by the
+rumours concerning them.&nbsp; Their first performance was
+<i>Douglas Tragedy</i> and the <i>Gentle Shepherd</i>: and the
+general opinion was, that the lad who played Norval in the play,
+and Patie in the farce, was an English lord&rsquo;s son, who had
+run away from his parents rather than marry an old cracket lady
+with a great portion.&nbsp; But, whatever truth there might be in
+this notion, certain it is, the whole pack was in a state of
+perfect beggary; and yet, for all that, they not only in their
+parts, as I was told, laughed most heartily, but made others do
+the same; for I was constrained to let my daughter go to see
+them, with some of her acquaintance; and she gave me such an
+account of what they did, that I thought I would have liked to
+have gotten a keek at them myself.&nbsp; At the same time, I must
+own this was a sinful curiosity, and I stifled it to the best of
+my ability.&nbsp; Among other plays that they did, was one called
+<i>Macbeth and the Witches</i>, which the Miss Cayennes had seen
+performed in London, when they were there in the winter time with
+their father, for three months, seeing the world, after coming
+from the boarding-school.&nbsp; But it was no more like the true
+play of Shakespeare the poet, according to their account, than a
+duddy betheral, set up to fright the sparrows from the peas, is
+like a living gentleman.&nbsp; The hungry players, instead of
+behaving like guests at the royal banquet, were voracious on the
+needful feast of bread, and the strong ale, that served for wine
+in decanters.&nbsp; But the greatest sport of all was about a
+kail-pot, that acted the part of a caldron, and which should have
+sunk with thunder and lightning into the earth; however, it did
+quite as well, for it made its exit, as Miss Virginia said, by
+walking quietly off, being pulled by a string fastened to one of
+its feet.&nbsp; No scene of the play was so much applauded as
+this one; and the actor who did the part of King Macbeth made a
+most polite bow of thankfulness to the audience, for the
+approbation with which they had received the performance of the
+pot.</p>
+<p>We had likewise, shortly after the &ldquo;Omnes exeunt&rdquo;
+of the players, an exhibition of a different sort in the same
+barn.&nbsp; This was by two English quakers, and a quaker lady,
+tanners of Kendal, who had been at Ayr on some leather business,
+where they preached, but made no proselytes.&nbsp; The travellers
+were all three in a whisky, drawn by one of the best-ordered
+horses, as the hostler at the Cross-Keys told me, ever
+seen.&nbsp; They came to the Inn to their dinner, and meaning to
+stay all night, sent round, to let it be known that they would
+hold a meeting in Friend Thacklan&rsquo;s barn; but Thomas denied
+they were either kith or kin to him: this, however, was their way
+of speaking.</p>
+<p>In the evening, owing to the notice, a great congregation was
+assembled in the barn, and I myself, along with Mr. Archibald
+Dozendale, went there likewise, to keep the people in awe; for we
+feared the strangers might be jeered and insulted.&nbsp; The
+three were seated aloft on a high stage, prepared on purpose,
+with two mares and scaffold-deals, borrowed from Mr. Trowel the
+mason.&nbsp; They sat long, and silent; but at last the spirit
+moved the woman, and she rose, and delivered a very sensible
+exposition of Christianity.&nbsp; I was really surprised to hear
+such sound doctrine; and Mr. Dozendale said, justly, that it was
+more to the purpose than some that my younger brethren from
+Edinburgh endeavoured to teach.&nbsp; So, that those who went to
+laugh at the sincere simplicity of the pious quakers, were
+rebuked by a very edifying discourse on the moral duties of a
+Christian&rsquo;s life.</p>
+<p>Upon the whole, however, this, to the best of my recollection,
+was another unsatisfactory year.&nbsp; In this we were,
+doubtless, brought more into the world; but we had a greater
+variety of temptation set before us, and there was still jealousy
+and estrangement in the dispositions of the gentry, and the lower
+orders, particularly the manufacturers.&nbsp; I cannot say,
+indeed, that there was any increase of corruption among the rural
+portion of my people; for their vocation calling them to work
+apart, in the purity of the free air of heaven, they were kept
+uncontaminated by that seditious infection which fevered the
+minds of the sedentary weavers, and working like flatulence in
+the stomachs of the cotton-spinners, sent up into their heads a
+vain and diseased fume of infidel philosophy.</p>
+<h2><a name="page211"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+211</span>CHAPTER XXXVII<br />
+YEAR 1796</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> prosperity of fortune is like
+the blossoms of spring, or the golden hue of the evening
+cloud.&nbsp; It delighteth the spirit, and passeth away.</p>
+<p>In the month of February my second wife was gathered to the
+Lord.&nbsp; She had been very ill for some time with an income in
+her side, which no medicine could remove.&nbsp; I had the best
+doctors in the country side to her; but their skill was of no
+avail, their opinions being that her ail was caused by an
+internal abscess, for which physic has provided no cure.&nbsp;
+Her death was to me a great sorrow; for she was a most excellent
+wife, industrious to a degree, and managed every thing with so
+brisk a hand, that nothing went wrong that she put it to.&nbsp;
+With her I had grown richer than any other minister in the
+presbytery; but, above all, she was the mother of my bairns,
+which gave her a double claim upon me.</p>
+<p>I laid her by the side of my first love, Betty Lanshaw, my own
+cousin that was, and I inscribed her name upon the same
+headstone; but time had drained my poetical vein, and I have not
+yet been able to indite an epitaph on her merits and virtues, for
+she had an eminent share of both.&nbsp; Her greatest
+fault&mdash;the best have their faults&mdash;was an
+over-earnestness to gather gear; in the doing of which I thought
+she sometimes sacrificed the comforts of a pleasant fireside; for
+she was never in her element but when she was keeping the
+servants eident at their work.&nbsp; But, if by this she
+subtracted something from the quietude that was most consonant to
+my nature, she has left cause, both in bank and bond, for me and
+her bairns to bless her great household activity.</p>
+<p>She was not long deposited in her place of rest till I had
+occasion to find her loss.&nbsp; All my things were kept by her
+in a most perjink and excellent order; but they soon fell into an
+amazing confusion; for, as she often said to me, I had a turn for
+heedlessness; insomuch, that although my daughter Janet was grown
+up, and able to keep the house, I saw that it would be necessary,
+as soon as decency would allow, for me to take another
+wife.&nbsp; I was moved to this chiefly by foreseeing that my
+daughter would in time be married, and taken away from me, but
+more on account of the servant lasses, who grew out of all
+bounds, verifying the proverb, &ldquo;Well kens the mouse when
+the cat&rsquo;s out of the house.&rdquo;&nbsp; Besides this, I
+was now far down in the vale of years, and could not expect to be
+long without feeling some of the penalties of old age, although I
+was still a hail and sound man.&nbsp; It therefore behoved me to
+look in time for a helpmate, to tend me in my approaching
+infirmities.</p>
+<p>Upon this important concern I reflected, as I may say, in the
+watches of the night; and, considering the circumstances of my
+situation, I saw it would not do for me to look out for an overly
+young woman, nor yet would it do for one of my ways to take an
+elderly maiden, ladies of that sort being liable to possess
+strong-set particularities.&nbsp; I therefore resolved that my
+choice should lie among widows of a discreet age; and I had a
+glimmer in my mind of speaking to Mrs. Malcolm; but when I
+reflected on the saintly steadiness of her character, I was
+satisfied it would be of no use to think of her.&nbsp;
+Accordingly, I bent my brows, and looked towards Irville, which
+is an abundant trone for widows and other single women; and I
+fixed my purpose on Mrs. Nugent, the relic of a professor in the
+university of Glasgow, both because she was a well-bred woman,
+without any children to plea about the interest of my own two,
+and likewise because she was held in great estimation by all who
+knew her, as a lady of a Christian principle.</p>
+<p>It was some time in the summer, however, before I made up my
+mind to speak to her on the subject; but one afternoon, in the
+month of August, I resolved to do so, and with that intent walked
+leisurely over to Irville; and after calling on the Rev. Dr.
+Dinwiddie, the minister, I stepped in, as if by chance, to Mrs.
+Nugent&rsquo;s.&nbsp; I could see that she was a little surprised
+at my visit; however, she treated me with every possible
+civility, and her servant lass bringing in the tea-things in a
+most orderly manner, as punctually as the clock was striking, she
+invited me to sit still, and drink my tea with her; which I did,
+being none displeased to get such encouragement.&nbsp; However, I
+said nothing that time, but returned to the manse, very well
+content with what I had observed, which made me fain to repeat my
+visit.&nbsp; So, in the course of the week, taking Janet my
+daughter with me, we walked over in the forenoon, and called at
+Mrs. Nugent&rsquo;s first, before going to any other house; and
+Janet saying, as we came out to go to the minister&rsquo;s, that
+she thought Mrs. Nugent an agreeable woman, I determined to knock
+the nail on the head without further delay.</p>
+<p>Accordingly, I invited the minister and his wife to dine with
+us on the Thursday following; and before leaving the town, I made
+Janet, while the minister and me were handling a subject, as a
+sort of thing in common civility, go to Mrs. Nugent, and invite
+her also.&nbsp; Dr. Dinwiddie was a gleg man, of a jocose nature;
+and he, guessing something of what I was ettling at, was very
+mirthful with me; but I kept my own counsel till a meet
+season.</p>
+<p>On the Thursday, the company as invited came, and nothing
+extraordinary was seen; but in cutting up and helping a hen, Dr.
+Dinwiddie put one wing on Mrs. Nugent&rsquo;s plate, and the
+other wing on my plate, and said, there have been greater
+miracles than these two wings flying together, which was a sharp
+joke, that caused no little merriment at the expense of Mrs.
+Nugent and me.&nbsp; I, however, to show that I was none daunted,
+laid a leg also on her plate, and took another on my own, saying,
+in the words of the reverend doctor, there have been greater
+miracles than that these two legs should lie in the same nest,
+which was thought a very clever come off; and, at the same time,
+I gave Mrs. Nugent a kindly nip on her sonsy arm, which was
+breaking the ice in as pleasant a way as could be.&nbsp; In
+short, before anything passed between ourselves on the subject,
+we were set down for a trysted pair; and this being the case, we
+were married as soon as a twelvemonth and a day had passed from
+the death of the second Mrs. Balwhidder; and neither of us have
+had occasion to rue the bargain.&nbsp; It is, however, but a
+piece of justice due to my second wife to say, that this was not
+a little owing to her good management; for she had left such a
+well-plenished house, that her successor said, we had nothing to
+do but to contribute to one another&rsquo;s happiness.</p>
+<p>In this year nothing more memorable happened in the parish,
+saving that the cotton-mill dam burst about the time of the
+Lammas flood, and the waters went forth like a deluge of
+destruction, carrying off much victual, and causing a vast of
+damage to the mills that are lower down the stream.&nbsp; It was
+just a prodigy to see how calmly Mr. Cayenne acted on that
+occasion; for, being at other times as crabbed as a wud terrier,
+folk were afraid to tell him, till he came out himself in the
+morning and saw the devastation; at the sight of which he gave
+only a shrill whistle, and began to laugh at the idea of the men
+fearing to take him the news, as if he had not fortune and
+philosophy enough, as he called it, to withstand much greater
+misfortunes.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p216b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Weaver"
+title=
+"The Weaver"
+ src="images/p216s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<h2><a name="page217"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+217</span>CHAPTER XXXVIII<br />
+YEAR 1797</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> I have seen in my walks the
+irrational creatures of God, the birds and the beasts, governed
+by a kindly instinct in attendance on their young, often has it
+come into my head that love and charity, far more than reason or
+justice, formed the tie that holds the world, with all its
+jarring wants and woes, in social dependence and obligation
+together; and, in this year, a strong verification of the
+soundness of this notion was exemplified in the conduct of the
+poor haverel lassie Meg Gaffaw, whose naturality on the occasion
+of her mother&rsquo;s death I have related at length in this
+chronicle.</p>
+<p>In the course of the summer, Mr. Henry Melcomb, who was a
+nephew to Mr. Cayenne, came down from England to see his
+uncle.&nbsp; He had just completed his education at the college
+of Christ Church, in Oxford, and was the most perfect young
+gentleman that had ever been seen in this part of the
+country.</p>
+<p>In his appearance he was a very paragon, with a fine manly
+countenance, frank-hearted, blithe, and, in many points of
+character, very like my old friend the Lord Eaglesham, who was
+shot.&nbsp; Indeed, in some respects, he was even above his
+lordship; for he had a great turn at ready wit, and could joke
+and banter in a most agreeable manner.&nbsp; He came very often
+to the manse to see me, and took great pleasure in my company,
+and really used a freedom that was so droll, I could scarcely
+keep my composity and decorum with him.&nbsp; Among others that
+shared in his attention, was daft Meg Gaffaw, whom he had
+forgathered with one day in coming to see me; and after
+conversing with her for some time, he handed her, as she told me
+herself, over the kirk-stile like a lady of high degree, and came
+with her to the manse door linking by the arm.</p>
+<p>From the ill-timed daffin of that hour, poor Meg fell deep in
+love with Mr. Melcomb; and it was just a playacting to see the
+arts and antics she put in practice to win his attention.&nbsp;
+In her garb, she had never any sense of a proper propriety, but
+went about the country asking for shapings of silks and satins,
+with which she patched her duds, calling them by the divers names
+of robes and neglig&eacute;es.&nbsp; All hitherto, however, had
+been moderation, compared to the daffadile of vanity which she
+was now seen, when she had searched, as she said, to the bottom
+of her coffer.&nbsp; I cannot take it upon me to describe her;
+but she kythed in such a variety of cuffs and ruffles, feathers,
+old gumflowers, painted paper knots, ribbons, and furs, and
+laces, and went about gecking and simpering with an old fan in
+her hand, that it was not in the power of nature to look at her
+with sobriety.</p>
+<p>Her first appearance in this masquerading was at the kirk on
+the Sunday following her adventure with Mr. Melcomb, and it was
+with a sore difficulty that I could keep my eyes off her, even in
+prayer; and when the kirk skailed, she walked before him,
+spreading all her grandeur to catch his eye, in such a manner as
+had not been seen or heard of since the prank that Lady Macadam
+played Miss Betty Wudrife.</p>
+<p>Any other but Mr. Melcomb would have been provoked by the
+fool&rsquo;s folly; but he humoured her wit, and, to the
+amazement of the whole people, presented her his hand, and
+allemanded her along in a manner that should not have been seen
+in any street out of a king&rsquo;s court, and far less on the
+Lord&rsquo;s day.&nbsp; But, alas! this sport did not last
+long.&nbsp; Mr. Melcomb had come from England to be
+&lsquo;married&rsquo; to his cousin, Miss Virginia Cayenne, and
+poor daft Meg never heard of it till the banns for their purpose
+of marriage was read out by Mr. Lorimore on the Sabbath
+after.&nbsp; The words were scarcely out of his mouth, when the
+simple and innocent natural gave a loud shriek, that terrified
+the whole congregation, and ran out of the kirk demented.&nbsp;
+There was no more finery for poor Meg; but she went and sat
+opposite to the windows of Mr. Cayenne&rsquo;s house, where Mr.
+Melcomb was, with clasped hands and beseeching eyes, like a
+monumental statue in alabaster, and no entreaty could drive her
+away.&nbsp; Mr. Melcomb sent her money, and the bride many a fine
+thing; but Meg flung them from her, and clasped her hands again,
+and still sat.&nbsp; Mr. Cayenne would have let loose the
+house-dog on her, but was not permitted.</p>
+<p>In the evening it began to rain, and they thought that and the
+coming darkness would drive her away; but when the servants
+looked out before barring the doors, there she was in the same
+posture.&nbsp; I was to perform the marriage ceremony at seven
+o&rsquo;clock in the morning, for the young pair were to go that
+night to Edinburgh; and when I went, there was Meg sitting
+looking at the windows with her hands clasped.&nbsp; When she saw
+me she gave a shrill cry, and took me by the hand, and wised me
+to go back, crying out in a heart-breaking voice, &ldquo;O,
+Sir!&nbsp; No yet&mdash;no yet!&nbsp; He&rsquo;ll maybe draw
+back, and think of a far truer bride.&rdquo;&nbsp; I was wae for
+her and very angry with the servants for laughing at the fond
+folly of the ill-less thing.</p>
+<p>When the marriage was over, and the carriage at the door, the
+bridegroom handed in the bride.&nbsp; Poor Meg saw this, and
+jumping up from where she sat, was at his side like a spirit, as
+he was stepping in, and, taking him by the hand, she looked in
+his face so piteously, that every heart was sorrowful, for she
+could say nothing.&nbsp; When he pulled away his hand, and the
+door was shut, she stood as if she had been charmed to the spot,
+and saw the chaise drive away.&nbsp; All that were about the door
+then spoke to her, but she heard us not.&nbsp; At last she gave a
+deep sigh, and the water coming into her eye, she said,
+&ldquo;The worm&mdash;the worm is my bonny bridegroom, and Jenny
+with the many-feet my bridal maid.&nbsp; The mill-dam
+water&rsquo;s the wine o&rsquo; the wedding, and the clay and the
+clod shall be my bedding.&nbsp; A lang night is meet for a
+bridal, but none shall be langer than mine.&rdquo;&nbsp; In
+saying which words, she fled from among us, with heels like the
+wind.&nbsp; The servants pursued; but long before they could stop
+her, she was past redemption in the deepest plumb of the
+cotton-mill dam.</p>
+<p>Few deaths had for many a day happened in the parish, to cause
+so much sorrow as that of this poor silly creature.&nbsp; She was
+a sort of household familiar among us, and there was much like
+the inner side of wisdom in the pattern of her sayings, many of
+which are still preserved as proverbs.</p>
+<h2><a name="page222"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+222</span>CHAPTER XXXIX<br />
+YEAR 1798</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> was one of the heaviest years
+in the whole course of my ministry.&nbsp; The spring was slow of
+coming, and cold and wet when it did come; the dibs were full,
+the roads foul, and the ground that should have been dry at the
+seed-time, was as claggy as clay, and clung to the harrow.&nbsp;
+The labour of man and beast was thereby augmented; and all nature
+being in a state of sluggish indisposition, it was evident to
+every eye of experience that there would be a great
+disappointment to the hopes of the husbandman.</p>
+<p>Foreseeing this, I gathered the opinion of all the most
+sagacious of my parishioners, and consulted with them for a
+provision against the evil day, and we spoke to Mr. Cayenne on
+the subject, for he had a talent by common in matters of
+mercantile management.&nbsp; It was amazing, considering his hot
+temper, with what patience he heard the grounds of our
+apprehension, and how he questioned and sifted the experience of
+the old farmers, till he was thoroughly convinced that all
+similar seed-times were ever followed by a short crop.&nbsp; He
+then said, that he would prove himself a better friend to the
+parish than he was thought.&nbsp; Accordingly, as he afterwards
+told me himself, he wrote off that very night to his
+correspondents in America, to buy for his account all the wheat
+and flour they could get, and ship it to arrive early in the
+fall; and he bought up likewise in countries round the Baltic
+great store of victual, and brought in two cargoes to Irville on
+purpose for the parish, against the time of need, making for the
+occasion a garnel of one of the warehouses of the
+cotton-mill.</p>
+<p>The event came to pass as had been foretold: the harvest fell
+short, and Mr. Cayenne&rsquo;s cargoes from America and the
+Baltic came home in due season, by which he made a terrible power
+of money, clearing thousands on thousands by post after
+post&mdash;making more profit, as he said himself, in the course
+of one month, he believed, than ever was made by any individual
+within the kingdom of Scotland in the course of a year.&mdash;He
+said, however that he might have made more if he had bought up
+the corn at home; but being convinced by us that there would be a
+scarcity, he thought it his duty as an honest man to draw from
+the stores and granaries of foreign countries, by which he was
+sure he would serve his country, and be abundantly
+rewarded.&nbsp; In short, we all reckoned him another Joseph when
+he opened his garnels at the cotton-mill, and, after distributing
+a liberal portion to the poor and needy, selling the remainder at
+an easy rate to the generality of the people.&nbsp; Some of the
+neighbouring parishes, however, were angry that he would not
+serve them likewise, and called him a wicked and extortionate
+forestaller; but he made it plain to the meanest capacity, that
+if he did not circumscribe his dispensation to our own bounds it
+would be as nothing.&nbsp; So that, although he brought a
+wonderful prosperity in by the cotton-mill, and a plenteous
+supply of corn in a time of famine, doing more in these things
+for the people than all the other heritors had done from the
+beginning of time, he was much reviled; even his bounty was
+little esteemed by my people, because he took a moderate profit
+on what he sold to them.&nbsp; Perhaps, however, these prejudices
+might be partly owing to their dislike of his hasty temper, at
+least I am willing to think so; for it would grieve me if they
+were really ungrateful for a benefit that made the pressure of
+the time lie but lightly on them.</p>
+<p>The alarm of the Irish rebellion in this year was likewise
+another source of affliction to us; for many of the gentry coming
+over in great straits, especially ladies and their children, and
+some of them in the hurry of their flight having but little ready
+money, were very ill off.&nbsp; Some four or five families came
+to the Cross-Keys in this situation, and the conduct of Mr.
+Cayenne to them was most exemplary.&nbsp; He remembered his own
+haste with his family from Virginia, when the Americans rebelled;
+and immediately on hearing of these Irish refugees, he waited on
+them with his wife and daughter, supplied them with money,
+invited them to his house, made ploys to keep up their spirits,
+while the other gentry stood back till they knew something of the
+strangers.</p>
+<p>Among these destitute ladies was a Mrs. Desmond and her two
+daughters, a woman of most august presence, being indeed more
+like one ordained to reign over a kingdom, than for household
+purposes.&nbsp; The Miss Desmonds were only entering their teens,
+but they also had no ordinary stamp upon them.&nbsp; What made
+this party the more particular, was on account of Mr. Desmond,
+who was supposed to be a united man with the rebels, and it was
+known his son was deep in their plots; yet although this was all
+told to Mr. Cayenne, by some of the other Irish ladies who were
+of the loyal connexion, it made no difference with him, but, on
+the contrary, he acted as if he thought the Desmonds the most of
+all the refugees entitled to his hospitable civilities.&nbsp;
+This was a wonderment to our strait-laced narrow lairds, as there
+was not a man of such strict government principles in the whole
+country side as Mr. Cayenne: but he said he carried his political
+principles only to the camp and the council.&nbsp; &ldquo;To the
+hospital and the prison,&rdquo; said he, &ldquo;I take those of a
+man&rdquo;&mdash;which was almost a Christian doctrine, and from
+that declaration Mr. Cayenne and me began again to draw a little
+more cordially together; although he had still a very imperfect
+sense of religion, which I attributed to his being born in
+America, where even as yet, I am told, they have but a scanty
+sprinkling of grace.</p>
+<p>But before concluding this year, I should tell the upshot of
+the visitation of the Irish, although it did not take place until
+some time after the peace with France.</p>
+<p>In the putting down of the rebels Mr. Desmond and his son made
+their escape to Paris, where they stayed till the treaty was
+signed, by which, for several years after the return to Ireland
+of the grand lady and her daughters, as Mrs. Desmond was called
+by our commonalty, we heard nothing of them.&nbsp; The other
+refugees repaid Mr. Cayenne his money with thankfulness, and, on
+their restoration to their homes, could not sufficiently express
+their sense of his kindness.&nbsp; But the silence and seeming
+ingratitude of the Desmonds vexed him; and he could not abide to
+hear the Irish rebellion mentioned without flying into a passion
+against the rebels, which every body knew was owing to the ill
+return he had received from that family.&nbsp; However, one
+afternoon, just about half an hour before his wonted dinner hour,
+a grand equipage, with four horses and outriders, stopped at his
+door, and who was in it but Mrs. Desmond and an elderly man, and
+a young gentleman with an aspect like a lord.&nbsp; It was her
+husband and son.&nbsp; They had come from Ireland in all their
+state on purpose to repay with interest the money Mr. Cayenne had
+counted so long lost, and to express in person the perpetual
+obligation which he had conferred upon the Desmond family, in all
+time coming.&nbsp; The lady then told him, that she had been so
+straitened in helping the poor ladies, that it was not in her
+power to make repayment till Desmond, as she called her husband,
+came home; and not choosing to assign the true reason, lest it
+might cause trouble, she rather submitted to be suspected of
+ingratitude than to an improper thing.</p>
+<p>Mr. Cayenne was transported with this unexpected return, and a
+friendship grew up between the families, which was afterwards
+cemented into relationship by the marriage of the young Desmond
+with Miss Caroline Cayenne.&nbsp; Some in the parish objected to
+this match, Mrs. Desmond being a papist: but as Miss Caroline had
+received an episcopalian education, I thought it of no
+consequence, and married them after their family chaplain from
+Ireland, as a young couple both by beauty and fortune well
+matched, and deserving of all conjugal felicity.</p>
+<h2><a name="page228"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+228</span>CHAPTER XL<br />
+YEAR 1799</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">There</span> are but two things to make me
+remember this year; the first was the marriage of my daughter
+Janet with the reverend Dr. Kittlewood of Swappington, a match in
+every way commendable; and on the advice of the third Mrs.
+Balwhidder, I settled a thousand pounds down, and promised five
+hundred more at my death if I died before my spouse, and a
+thousand at her death if she survived me; which was the greatest
+portion ever minister&rsquo;s daughter had in our country
+side.&nbsp; In this year likewise I advanced fifteen hundred
+pounds for my son in a concern in Glasgow,&mdash;all was the
+gathering of that indefatigable engine of industry the second
+Mrs. Balwhidder, whose talents her successor said were a wonder,
+when she considered the circumstances in which I had been left at
+her death, and made out of a narrow stipend.</p>
+<p>The other memorable was the death of Mrs. Malcolm.&nbsp; If
+ever there was a saint on this earth, she was surely one.&nbsp;
+She had been for some time bedfast, having all her days from the
+date of her widowhood been a tender woman; but no change made any
+alteration on the Christian contentment of her mind.&nbsp; She
+bore adversity with an honest pride; she toiled in the day of
+penury and affliction with thankfulness for her earnings,
+although ever so little.&nbsp; She bent her head to the Lord in
+resignation when her first-born fell in battle; nor was she
+puffed up with vanity when her daughters were married, as it was
+said, so far above their degree, though they showed it was but
+into their proper sphere by their demeanour after.&nbsp; She
+lived to see her second son, the captain, rise into affluence,
+married, and with a thriving young family; and she had the very
+great satisfaction, on the last day she was able to go to church,
+to see her youngest son the clergyman standing in my pulpit, a
+doctor of divinity, and the placed minister of a richer parish
+than mine.&nbsp; Well indeed might she have said on that day,
+&ldquo;Lord, let thy servant depart in peace, for mine eyes have
+seen thy salvation.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>For some time it had been manifest to all who saw her, that
+her latter end was drawing nigh; and therefore, as I had kept up
+a correspondence with her daughters, Mrs. Macadam and Mrs.
+Howard, I wrote them a particular account of her case, which
+brought them to the clachan.&nbsp; They both came in their own
+carriages; for Colonel Macadam was now a general, and had
+succeeded to a great property by an English uncle, his
+mother&rsquo;s brother; and Captain Howard, by the death of his
+father, was also a man, as it was said, with a lord&rsquo;s
+living.&nbsp; Robert Malcolm, her son the captain, was in the
+West Indies at the time; but his wife came on the first summons,
+as did William the minister.</p>
+<p>They all arrived about four o&rsquo;clock in the afternoon,
+and at seven a message came for me and Mrs. Balwhidder to go over
+to them, which we did, and found the strangers seated by the
+heavenly patient&rsquo;s bedside.&nbsp; On my entering, she
+turned her eyes towards me, and said, &ldquo;Bear witness, sir,
+that I die thankful for an extraordinary portion of temporal
+mercies.&nbsp; The heart of my youth was withered like the leaf
+that is scared with the lightning; but in my children I have
+received a great indemnification for the sorrows of that
+trial.&rdquo;&nbsp; She then requested me to pray, saying,
+&ldquo;No; let it be a thanksgiving.&nbsp; My term is out, and I
+have nothing more to hope or fear from the good or evil of this
+world.&nbsp; But I have had much to make me grateful; therefore,
+sir, return thanks for the time I have been spared, for the
+goodness granted so long unto me, and the gentle hand with which
+the way from this world is smoothed for my passing.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>There was something so sweet and consolatory in the way she
+said this, that although it moved all present to tears, they were
+tears without the wonted bitterness of grief.&nbsp; Accordingly,
+I knelt down and did as she had required, and there was a great
+stillness while I prayed.&nbsp; At the conclusion we looked to
+the bed, but the spirit had, in the mean time, departed, and
+there was nothing remaining but the clay tenement.</p>
+<p>It was expected by the parish, considering the vast affluence
+of the daughters, that there would have been a grand funeral, and
+Mrs. Howard thought it was necessary; but her sister, who had
+from her youth upward a superior discernment of propriety, said,
+&ldquo;No, as my mother has lived, so shall be her
+end.&rdquo;&nbsp; Accordingly, everybody of any respect in the
+clachan was invited to the funeral; but none of the gentry,
+saving only such as had been numbered among the acquaintance of
+the deceased.&nbsp; But Mr. Cayenne came unbidden, saying to me,
+that although he did not know Mrs. Malcolm personally, he had
+often heard she was an amiable woman, and therefore he thought it
+a proper compliment to her family, who were out of the parish, to
+show in what respect she was held among us; for he was a man that
+would take his own way, and do what he thought was right,
+heedless alike of blame or approbation.</p>
+<p>If, however, the funeral was plain, though respectable, the
+ladies distributed a liberal sum among the poor families; but
+before they went away, a silent token of their mother&rsquo;s
+virtue came to light, which was at once a source of sorrow and
+pleasure.&nbsp; Mrs. Malcolm was first well provided by the
+Macadams, afterwards the Howards settled on her an equal annuity,
+by which she spent her latter days in great comfort.&nbsp; Many a
+year before, she had repaid Provost Maitland the money he sent
+her in the day of her utmost distress; and at this period he was
+long dead, having died of a broken heart at the time of his
+failure.&nbsp; From that time his widow and her daughters had
+been in very straitened circumstances; but unknown to all but
+herself, and <span class="smcap">Him</span> from whom nothing is
+hid, Mrs. Malcolm from time to time had sent them, in a blank
+letter, an occasional note to the young ladies to buy a
+gown.&nbsp; After her death, a bank-bill for a sum of money, her
+own savings, was found in her scrutoire, with a note of her own
+writing pinned to the same, stating, that the amount being more
+than she had needed for herself, belonged of right to those who
+had so generously provided for her; but as they were not in want
+of such a trifle, it would be a token of respect to her memory,
+if they would give the bill to Mrs. Maitland and her daughters,
+which was done with the most glad alacrity; and, in the doing of
+it, the private kindness was brought to light.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p232b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Millwright"
+title=
+"The Millwright"
+ src="images/p232s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>Thus ended the history of Mrs. Malcolm, as connected with our
+Parish Annals.&nbsp; Her house was sold, and is the same now
+inhabited by the millwright, Mr. Periffery; and a neat house it
+still is, for the possessor is an Englishman, and the English
+have an uncommon taste for snod houses and trim gardens; but at
+the time it was built, there was not a better in the town, though
+it&rsquo;s now but of the second class.&nbsp; Yearly we hear both
+from Mrs. Macadam and her sister, with a five-pound note from
+each to the poor of the parish, as a token of their remembrance;
+but they are far off, and, were any thing ailing me, I suppose
+the gift will not be continued.&nbsp; As for Captain Malcolm, he
+has proved, in many ways, a friend to such of our young men as
+have gone to sea.&nbsp; He has now left it off himself, and
+settled at London, where he latterly sailed from, and, I
+understand, is in a great way as a shipowner.&nbsp; These things
+I have thought it fitting to record, and will now resume my
+historical narration.</p>
+<h2><a name="page234"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+234</span>CHAPTER XLI<br />
+YEAR 1800</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> same quietude and regularity
+that marked the progress of the last year, continued throughout
+the whole of this.&nbsp; We sowed and reaped in tranquillity,
+though the sough of distant war came heavily from a
+distance.&nbsp; The cotton-mill did well for the company, and
+there was a sobriety in the minds of the spinners and weavers,
+which showed that the crisis of their political distemperature
+was over;&mdash;there was something more of the old prudence in
+men&rsquo;s reflections; and it was plain to see that the
+elements of reconciliation were coming together throughout the
+world.&nbsp; The conflagration of the French Revolution was
+indeed not extinguished, but it was evidently burning out; and
+their old reverence for the Grand Monarque was beginning to
+revive among them, though they only called him a consul.&nbsp;
+Upon the king&rsquo;s fast I preached on this subject; and when
+the peace was concluded, I got great credit for my foresight, but
+there was no merit in&rsquo;t.&nbsp; I had only lived longer than
+the most of those around me, and had been all my days a close
+observer of the signs of the times; so that what was lightly
+called prophecy and prediction, were but a probability that
+experience had taught me to discern.</p>
+<p>In the affairs of the parish, the most remarkable generality
+(for we had no particular catastrophe) was a great death of old
+people in the spring.&nbsp; Among others, Miss Sabrina, the
+school mistress, paid the debt of nature, but we could now better
+spare her than we did her predecessor; for at Cayenneville there
+was a broken manufacturer&rsquo;s wife, an excellent teacher, and
+a genteel and modernised woman, who took the better order of
+children; and Miss Sabrina having been long frail (for she was
+never stout), a decent and discreet carlin, Mrs. M&lsquo;Caffie,
+the widow of a custom-house officer, that was a native of the
+parish, set up another for plainer work.&nbsp; Her opposition
+Miss Sabrina did not mind, but she was sorely displeased at the
+interloping of Mrs. Pirn at Cayenneville, and some said it helped
+to kill her&mdash;of that, however, I am not so certain; for Dr.
+Tanzey had told me in the winter, that he thought the sharp winds
+in March would blow out her candle, as it was burnt to the snuff;
+accordingly, she took her departure from this life, on the
+twenty-fifth day of that month, after there had, for some days
+prior, been a most cold and piercing east wind.</p>
+<p>Miss Sabrina, who was always an oddity and aping grandeur, it
+was found, had made a will, leaving her gatherings to her
+favourites, with all regular formality.&nbsp; To one she
+bequeathed a gown, to another this, and a third that, and to me a
+pair of black silk stockings.&nbsp; I was amazed when I heard
+this; but judge what I felt, when a pair of old marrowless
+stockings, darned in the heel, and not whole enough in the legs
+to make a pair of mittens to Mrs. Balwhidder, were delivered to
+me by her executor, Mr. Caption, the lawyer.&nbsp; Saving,
+however, this kind of flummery, Miss Sabrina was a harmless
+creature, and could quote poetry in discourse more glibly than
+texts of Scripture&mdash;her father having spared no pains on her
+mind: as for her body, it could not be mended; but that was not
+her fault.</p>
+<p>After her death, the session held a consultation, and we
+agreed to give the same salary that Miss Sabrina enjoyed to Mrs.
+M&lsquo;Caffie, which angered Mr. Cayenne, who thought it should
+have been given to the head mistress; and it made him give Mrs.
+Pirn, out of his own pocket, double the sum.&nbsp; But we
+considered that the parish funds were for the poor of the parish,
+and therefore it was our duty to provide for the instruction of
+the poor children.&nbsp; Saving, therefore, those few notations,
+I have nothing further to say concerning the topics and progress
+of this Ann. Dom.</p>
+<h2><a name="page237"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+237</span>CHAPTER XLII<br />
+YEAR 1801</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> is often to me very curious food
+for meditation, that as the parish increased in population, there
+should have been less cause for matter to record.&nbsp; Things
+that in former days would have occasioned great discourse and
+cogitation, are forgotten with the day in which they happen; and
+there is no longer that searching into personalities which was so
+much in vogue during the first epoch of my ministry, which I
+reckon the period before the American war; nor has there been any
+such germinal changes among us, as those which took place in the
+second epoch, counting backward from the building of the
+cotton-mill that gave rise to the town of Cayenneville.&nbsp; But
+still we were not, even at this era, of which this Ann. Dom. is
+the beginning, without occasional personality, or an event that
+deserved to be called a germinal.</p>
+<p>Some years before, I had noted among the callans at Mr.
+Lorimore&rsquo;s school a long soople laddie, who, like all
+bairns that grow fast and tall, had but little smeddum.&nbsp; He
+could not be called a dolt, for he was observant and thoughtful,
+and giving to asking sagacious questions; but there was a
+sleepiness about him, especially in the kirk, and he gave, as the
+master said, but little application to his lessons, so that folk
+thought he would turn out a sort of gaunt-at-the-door, more
+mindful of meat than work.&nbsp; He was, however, a good-natured
+lad; and, when I was taking my solitary walks of meditation, I
+sometimes fell in with him sitting alone on the brae by the
+water-side, and sometimes lying on the grass, with his hands
+under his head, on the sunny green knolls where Mr. Cylinder, the
+English engineer belonging to the cotton-work, has built the
+bonny house that he calls Diryhill Cottage.&nbsp; This was when
+Colin Mavis was a laddie at the school, and when I spoke to him,
+I was surprised at the discretion of his answers; so that
+gradually I began to think and say, that there was more about
+Colin than the neighbours knew.&nbsp; Nothing, however, for many
+a day, came out to his advantage; so that his mother, who was by
+this time a widow woman, did not well know what to do with him,
+and folk pitied her heavy handful of such a droud.</p>
+<p>By-and-by, however, it happened that one of the young clerks
+at the cotton-mill shattered his right-hand thumb by a gun
+bursting; and, being no longer able to write, was sent into the
+army to be an ensign, which caused a vacancy in the office; and,
+through the help of Mr. Cayenne, I got Colin Mavis into the
+place, where, to the surprise of everybody, he proved a wonderful
+eident and active lad, and, from less to more, has come at the
+head of all the clerks, and deep in the confidentials of his
+employers.&nbsp; But although this was a great satisfaction to
+me, and to the widow woman his mother, it somehow was not so much
+so to the rest of the parish, who seemed, as it were, angry that
+poor Colin had not proved himself such a dolt as they had
+expected and foretold.</p>
+<p>Among other ways that Colin had of spending his leisure, was
+that of playing music on an instrument, in which it was said he
+made a wonderful proficiency; but being long and thin, and of a
+delicate habit of body, he was obligated to refrain from this
+recreation; so he betook himself to books, and from reading he
+began to try writing; but, as this was done in a corner, nobody
+jealoused what he was about, till one evening in this year he
+came to the manse, and asked a word in private with me.&nbsp; I
+thought that perhaps he had fallen in with a lass, and was come
+to consult me anent matrimony; but when we were by ourselves, in
+my study, he took out of his pocket a number of the <i>Scots
+Magazine</i>, and said, &ldquo;Sir, you have been long pleased to
+notice me more than any other body, and when I got this, I could
+not refrain from bringing it, to let you see&rsquo;t.&nbsp; Ye
+maun ken, sir, that I have been long in secret given to trying my
+hand at rhyme; and, wishing to ascertain what others thought of
+my power in that way, I sent by the post twa three verses to the
+<i>Scots Magazine</i>, and they have not only inserted them, but
+placed them in the body of the book, in such a way that I kenna
+what to think.&rdquo;&nbsp; So I looked at the Magazine, and read
+his verses, which were certainly very well-made verses for one
+who had no regular education.&nbsp; But I said to him, as the
+Greenock magistrates said to John Wilson, the author of
+&ldquo;Clyde,&rdquo; when they stipulated with him to give up the
+art, that poem-making was a profane and unprofitable trade, and
+he would do well to turn his talent to something of more
+solidity, which he promised to do; but he has since put out a
+book, whereby he has angered all those that had foretold he would
+be a do-nae-gude.&nbsp; Thus has our parish walked sidy for sidy
+with all the national improvements, having an author of its own,
+and getting a literary character in the ancient and famous
+republic of letters.</p>
+<h2><a name="page241"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+241</span>CHAPTER XLIII<br />
+YEAR 1802</h2>
+<p>&ldquo;<span class="smcap">Experience</span> teaches
+fools,&rdquo; was the first moral apothegm that I wrote in small
+text, when learning to write at the school, and I have ever since
+thought it was a very sensible reflection.&nbsp; For assuredly,
+as year after year has flown away on the swift wings of time, I
+have found my experience mellowing, and my discernment improving;
+by which I have, in the afternoon of life, been enabled to
+foresee what kings and nations would do, by the symptoms
+manifested within the bounds of the society around me.&nbsp;
+Therefore, at the beginning of the spring in this Ann. Dom., I
+had misgivings at the heart, a fluttering in my thoughts, and
+altogether a strange uneasiness as to the stability of the peace
+and harmony that was supposed to be founded upon a steadfast
+foundation between us and the French people.&nbsp; What my fears
+principally took their rise from, was a sort of compliancy, on
+the part of those in power and authority, to cultivate the old
+relations and parts between them and the commonalty.&nbsp; It did
+not appear to me that this proceeded from any known or decided
+event, for I read the papers at this period daily; but from some
+general dread and fear, that was begotten, like a vapour out of
+the fermentation of all sorts of opinions; most people of any
+sagacity thinking that the state of things in France being so
+much of an antic, poetical, and playactor-like guise, that it
+would never obtain that respect, far less that reverence from the
+world, which is necessary to the maintenance of all beneficial
+government.&nbsp; The consequence of this was a great distrust
+between man and man, and an aching restlessness among those who
+had their bread to bake in the world; persons possessing the
+power to provide for their kindred, forcing them, as it were,
+down the throats of those who were dependent on them in business,
+a bitter morsel.</p>
+<p>But the pith of these remarks chiefly applies to the
+manufacturing concerns of the new town of Cayenneville; for in
+the clachan we lived in the lea of the dike, and were more taken
+up with our own natural rural affairs, and the markets for
+victual, than the craft of merchandise.&nbsp; The only man
+interested in business, who walked in a steady manner at his old
+pace, though he sometimes was seen, being of a spunkie temper,
+grinding the teeth of vexation, was Mr. Cayenne himself.</p>
+<p>One day, however, he came to me at the manse.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;Doctor,&rdquo; says he, for so he always called me,
+&ldquo;I want your advice.&nbsp; I never choose to trouble others
+with my private affairs; but there are times when the word of an
+honest man may do good.&nbsp; I need not tell you, that when I
+declared myself a Royalist in America, it was at a considerable
+sacrifice.&nbsp; I have, however, nothing to complain of against
+government on that score; but I think it damn&rsquo;d hard that
+those personal connexions, whose interests I preserved to the
+detriment of my own, should in my old age make such an ungrateful
+return.&nbsp; By the steps I took prior to quitting America, I
+saved the property of a great mercantile concern in London.&nbsp;
+In return for that, they took a share with me, and for me, in the
+cotton-mill; and being here on the spot, as manager, I have both
+made and saved them money.&nbsp; I have, no doubt, bettered my
+own fortune in the mean time.&nbsp; Would you believe it, doctor,
+they have written a letter to me, saying that they wish to
+provide for a relation, and requiring me to give up to him a
+portion of my share in the concern&mdash;a pretty sort of
+providing this, at another man&rsquo;s expense!&nbsp; But
+I&rsquo;ll be damn&rsquo;d if I do any such thing!&nbsp; If they
+want to provide for their friend, let them do so from themselves,
+and not at my cost&mdash;What is your opinion?&rdquo;</p>
+<p>This appeared to me a very weighty concern, and, not being
+versed in mercantile dealing, I did not well know what to say;
+but I reflected for some time, and then I replied, &ldquo;As far,
+Mr. Cayenne, as my observation has gone in this world, I think
+that the giffs and the gaffs nearly balance one another; and when
+they do not, there is a moral defect on the failing side.&nbsp;
+If a man long gives his labour to his employer, and is paid for
+that labour, it might be said that both are equal; but I say
+no.&nbsp; For it&rsquo;s in human nature to be prompt to change;
+and the employer, having always more in his power than his
+servant or agent, it seems to me a clear case, that in the course
+of a number of years, the master of the old servant is the
+obligated of the two; and therefore I say, in the first place, in
+your case there is no tie or claim, by which you may, in a moral
+sense, be called upon to submit to the dictates of your London
+correspondents; but there is a reason, in the nature of the thing
+and case, by which you may ask a favour from them&mdash;So, the
+advice I would give you would be this: write an answer to their
+letter, and tell them that you have no objection to the taking in
+of a new partner, but you think it would be proper to revise all
+the copartnery, especially as you have, considering the manner in
+which you have advanced the business, been of opinion, that your
+share should be considerably enlarged.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>I thought Mr. Cayenne would have louped out of his skin with
+mirth at this notion; and, being a prompt man, he sat down at my
+scrutoire, and answered the letter which gave him so much
+uneasiness.&nbsp; No notice was taken of it for some time; but in
+the course of a month he was informed, that it was not considered
+expedient at that time to make any change in the company.&nbsp; I
+thought the old man was gone by himself when he got this
+letter.&nbsp; He came over instantly in his chariot, from the
+cotton-mill office to the manse, and swore an oath, by some
+dreadful name, that I was a Solomon.&nbsp; However, I only
+mention this to show how experience had instructed me, and as a
+sample of that sinister provisioning of friends that was going on
+in the world at this time&mdash;all owing, as I do verily
+believe, to the uncertain state of governments and national
+affairs.</p>
+<p>Besides these generalities, I observed another thing working
+to effect&mdash;mankind read more, and the spirit of reflection
+and reasoning was more awake than at any time within my
+remembrance.&nbsp; Not only was there a handsome
+bookseller&rsquo;s shop in Cayenneville, with a London newspaper
+daily, but magazines, and reviews, and other new
+publications.</p>
+<p>Till this year, when a chaise was wanted we had to send to
+Irville; but Mr. Toddy of the Cross-Keys being in at Glasgow, he
+bought an excellent one at the second-hand, a portion of the
+effects of a broken merchant, by which, from that period, we had
+one of our own, and it proved a great convenience; for I, who
+never but twice in my life before hired that kind of commodity,
+had it thrice during the summer, for a bit jaunt with Mrs.
+Balwhidder to divers places and curiosities in the county that I
+had not seen before, by which our ideas were greatly enlarged;
+indeed, I have always had a partiality for travelling, as one of
+the best means of opening the faculty of the mind, and giving
+clear and correct notions of men and things.</p>
+<h2><a name="page247"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+247</span>CHAPTER XLIV<br />
+YEAR 1803</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">During</span> the tempestuous times that
+ensued, from the death of the King of France by the hands of the
+executioner in 1793, there had been a political schism among my
+people that often made me very uneasy.&nbsp; The folk belonging
+to the cotton-mill, and the muslin-weavers in Cayenneville, were
+afflicted with the itch of jacobinism, but those of the village
+were stanch and true to king and country; and some of the
+heritors were desirous to make volunteers of the young men of
+them, in case of anything like the French anarchy and confusion
+rising on the side of the manufacturers.&nbsp; I, however, set
+myself, at that time, against this, for I foresaw that the French
+business was but a fever which would soon pass off; but no man
+could tell the consequence of putting arms in the hands of
+neighbour against neighbour, though it was but in the way of
+policy.</p>
+<p>But when Bonaparte gathered his host fornent the English
+coast, and the government at London were in terror of their lives
+for an invasion, all in the country saw that there was danger,
+and I was not backward in sounding the trumpet to battle.&nbsp;
+For a time, however, there was a diffidence among us
+somewhere.&nbsp; The gentry had a distrust of the manufacturers,
+and the farming lads were wud with impatience, that those who
+should be their leaders would not come forth.&nbsp; I, knowing
+this, prepared a sermon suitable to the occasion, giving out from
+the pulpit myself, the Sabbath before preaching it, that it was
+my intent, on the next Lord&rsquo;s day, to deliver a religious
+and political exhortation on the present posture of public
+affairs.&nbsp; This drew a vast congregation of all ranks.</p>
+<p>I trow that the stoor had no peace in the stuffing of the
+pulpit in that day; and the effect was very great and speedy: for
+next morning the weavers and cotton-mill folk held a meeting, and
+they, being skilled in the ways of committees and associating
+together, had certain resolutions prepared, by which a select few
+was appointed to take an enrolment of all willing in the parish
+to serve as volunteers in defence of their king and country, and
+to concert with certain gentlemen named therein, about the
+formation of a corps, of which, it was an understood thing, the
+said gentlemen were to be the officers.&nbsp; The whole of this
+business was managed with the height of discretion; and the
+weavers, and spinners, and farming lads, vied with one another
+who should be first on the list.&nbsp; But that which the most
+surprised me, was the wonderful sagacity of the committee in
+naming the gentlemen that should be the officers.&nbsp; I could
+not have made a better choice myself; for they were the best
+built, the best bred, and the best natured, in the parish.&nbsp;
+In short, when I saw the bravery that was in my people, and the
+spirit of wisdom by which it was directed, I said in my heart,
+the Lord of Hosts is with us, and the adversary shall not
+prevail.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p248b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Silhouette"
+title=
+"The Silhouette"
+ src="images/p248s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>The number of valiant men which at that time placed themselves
+around the banners of their country was so great, that the
+government would not accept of all who offered; so, like as in
+other parishes, we were obligated to make a selection, which was
+likewise done in a most judicious manner, all men above a certain
+age being reserved for the defence of the parish, in the day when
+the young might be called to England to fight the enemy.</p>
+<p>When the corps was formed, and the officers named, they made
+me their chaplain, and Dr. Marigold their doctor.&nbsp; He was a
+little man with a big belly, and was as crouse as a bantam cock;
+but it was not thought he could do so well in field exercises, on
+which account he was made the doctor, although he had no repute
+in that capacity in comparison with Dr. Tanzey, who was not,
+however, liked, being a stiff-mannered man, with a sharp
+temper.</p>
+<p>All things having come to a proper head, the young ladies of
+the parish resolved to present the corps with a stand of colours,
+which they embroidered themselves, and a day was fixed for the
+presentation of the same.&nbsp; Never was such a day seen in
+Dalmailing.&nbsp; The sun shone brightly on that scene of bravery
+and grandeur, and far and near the country folk came flocking in;
+and we had the regimental band of music hired from the soldiers
+that were in Ayr barracks.&nbsp; The very first sound o&rsquo;t
+made the hair on my old grey head to prickle up, and my blood to
+rise and glow as if youth was coming again into my veins.</p>
+<p>Sir Hugh Montgomerie was the commandant; and he came in all
+the glory of war, on his best horse, and marched at the head of
+the men to the green-head.&nbsp; The doctor and me were the
+rearguard: not being able, on account of my age and his fatness,
+to walk so fast as the quick-step of the corps.&nbsp; On the
+field, we took our place in front, near Sir Hugh and the ladies
+with the colours; and after some salutations, according to the
+fashion of the army, Sir Hugh made a speech to the men, and then
+Miss Maria Montgomerie came forward, with her sister Miss Eliza,
+and the other ladies, and the banners were unfurled, all
+glittering with gold, and the king&rsquo;s arms in
+needlework.&nbsp; Miss Maria then made a speech, which she had
+got by heart; but she was so agitated that it was said she forgot
+the best part of it: however, it was very well considering.&nbsp;
+When this was done, I then stepped forward, and laying my hat on
+the ground, every man and boy taking off theirs, I said a prayer,
+which I had conned most carefully, and which I thought the most
+suitable I could devise, in unison with Christian principles,
+which are averse to the shedding of blood; and I particularly
+dwelt upon some of the specialities of our situation.</p>
+<p>When I had concluded, the volunteers gave three great shouts,
+and the multitude answered them to the same tune, and all the
+instruments of music sounded, making such a bruit as could not be
+surpassed for grandeur&mdash;a long, and very circumstantial
+account of all which, may be read in the newspapers of that
+time.</p>
+<p>The volunteers, at the word of command, then showed us the way
+they were to fight with the French, in the doing of which a sad
+disaster happened; for when they were charging bayonets, they
+came towards us like a flood, and all the spectators ran; and I
+ran, and the doctor ran; but being laden with his belly, he could
+not run fast enough, so he lay down, and being just before me at
+the time, I tumbled over him, and such a shout of laughter shook
+the field as was never heard.</p>
+<p>When the fatigues of the day were at an end, we marched to the
+cotton-mill, where, in one of the ware-houses, a vast table was
+spread, and a dinner, prepared at Mr. Cayenne&rsquo;s own
+expense, sent in from the Cross-Keys, and the whole corps, with
+many of the gentry of the neighbourhood, dined with great
+jollity, the band of music playing beautiful airs all the
+time.&nbsp; At night there was a universal dance, gentle and
+semple mingled together.&nbsp; All which made it plain to me,
+that the Lord, by this unison of spirit, had decreed our national
+preservation; but I kept this in my own breast, lest it might
+have the effect to relax the vigilance of the kingdom.&nbsp; And
+I should note that Colin Mavis, the poetical lad, of whom I have
+spoken in another part, made a song for this occasion that was
+very mightily thought of, having in it a nerve of valiant genius,
+that kindled the very souls of those that heard it.</p>
+<h2><a name="page253"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+253</span>CHAPTER XLV<br />
+YEAR 1804</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">In</span> conformity with the altered
+fashions of the age, in this year the session came to an
+understanding with me, that we should not inflict the common
+church censures for such as made themselves liable thereto; but
+we did not formally promulge our resolution as to this, wishing
+as long as possible to keep the deterring rod over the heads of
+the young and thoughtless.&nbsp; Our motive, on the one hand, was
+the disregard of the manufacturers in Cayenneville, who were,
+without the breach of truth, an irreligious people; and, on the
+other, a desire to preserve the ancient and wholesome admonitory
+and censorian jurisdiction of the minister and elders.&nbsp; We
+therefore laid it down as a rule to ourselves, that, in the case
+of transgressions on the part of the inhabitants of the new
+district of Cayenneville, we should subject them rigorously to a
+fine; but that for the farming-lads, we would put it in their
+option to pay the fine, or stand in the kirk.</p>
+<p>We conformed also in another matter to the times, by
+consenting to baptize occasionally in private houses.&nbsp;
+Hitherto it had been a strict rule with me only to baptize from
+the pulpit.&nbsp; Other parishes, however, had long been in the
+practice of this relaxation of ancient discipline.</p>
+<p>But all this on my part, was not done without compunction of
+spirit; for I was of opinion, that the principle of Presbyterian
+integrity should have been maintained to the uttermost.&nbsp;
+Seeing, however, the elders set on an alteration, I distrusted my
+own judgment, and yielded myself to the considerations that
+weighed with them; for they were true men, and of a godly
+honesty, and took the part of the poor in all contentions with
+the heritors, often to the hazard and damage of their own
+temporal welfare.</p>
+<p>I have now to note a curious thing, not on account of its
+importance, but to show to what lengths a correspondence had been
+opened in the parish with the farthest parts of the earth.&nbsp;
+Mr. Cayenne got a turtle-fish sent to him from a Glasgow
+merchant, and it was living when it came to the Wheatrig House,
+and was one of the most remarkable beasts that had ever been seen
+in our country side.&nbsp; It weighed as much as a well-fed calf,
+and had three kinds of meat in its body, fish, flesh, and fowl,
+and it had four water-wings, for they could not be properly
+called fins; but what was little short of a miracle about the
+creature, happened after the head was cutted off, when, if a
+finger was offered to it, it would open its mouth and snap at it,
+and all this after the carcass was divided for dressing.</p>
+<p>Mr. Cayenne made a feast on the occasion to many of the
+neighbouring gentry, to the which I was invited; and we drank
+lime-punch as we ate the turtle, which, as I understand, is the
+fashion in practice among the Glasgow West Indy merchants, who
+are famed as great hands with turtles and lime-punch.&nbsp; But
+it is a sort of food that I should not like to fare long
+upon.&nbsp; I was not right the next day; and I have heard it
+said, that when eaten too often, it has a tendency to harden the
+heart and make it crave for greater luxuries.</p>
+<p>But the story of the turtle is nothing to that of the Mass,
+which, with all its mummeries and abominations, was brought into
+Cayenneville by an Irish priest of the name of Father
+O&rsquo;Grady, who was confessor to some of the poor deluded
+Irish labourers about the new houses and the cotton-mill.&nbsp;
+How he had the impudence to set up that memento of Satan, the
+crucifix, within my parish and jurisdiction, was what I never
+could get to the bottom of; but the soul was shaken within me,
+when, on the Monday after, one of the elders came to the manse,
+and told me that the old dragon of Popery, with its seven heads
+and ten horns, had been triumphing in Cayenneville on the
+foregoing Lord&rsquo;s day!&nbsp; I lost no time in convening the
+session to see what was to be done; much, however, to my
+surprise, the elders recommended no step to be taken, but only a
+zealous endeavour to greater Christian excellence on our part, by
+which we should put the beast and his worshippers to shame and
+flight.&nbsp; I am free to confess, that, at the time, I did not
+think this the wisest counsel which they might have given; for,
+in the heat of my alarm, I was for attacking the enemy in his
+camp.&nbsp; But they prudently observed, that the days of
+religious persecution were past, and it was a comfort to see
+mankind cherishing any sense of religion at all, after the
+vehement infidelity that had been sent abroad by the French
+Republicans; and to this opinion, now that I have had years to
+sift its wisdom, I own myself a convert and proselyte.</p>
+<p>Fortunately, however, for my peace of mind, there proved to be
+but five Roman Catholics in Cayenneville; and Father
+O&rsquo;Grady not being able to make a living there, packed up
+his Virgin Marys, saints, and painted Agneses in a portmanteau,
+and went off in the Ayr fly one morning for Glasgow, where I hear
+he has since met with all the encouragement that might be
+expected from the ignorant and idolatrous inhabitants of that
+great city.</p>
+<p>Scarcely were we well rid of Father O&rsquo;Grady, when
+another interloper entered the parish.&nbsp; He was more
+dangerous, in the opinion of the session, than even the Pope of
+Rome himself; for he came to teach the flagrant heresy of
+Universal Redemption, a most consolatory doctrine to the sinner
+that is loth to repent, and who loves to troll his iniquity like
+a sweet morsel under his tongue.&nbsp; Mr. Martin Siftwell, who
+was the last ta&rsquo;en on elder, and who had received a liberal
+and judicious education, and was, moreover, naturally possessed
+of a quick penetration, observed, in speaking of this new
+doctrine, that the grossest papist sinner might have some qualms
+of fear after he had bought the Pope&rsquo;s pardon, and might
+thereby be led to a reformation of life; but that the doctrine of
+universal redemption was a bribe to commit sin, the wickedest
+mortal, according to it, being only liable to a few thousand
+years, more or less, of suffering, which, compared with eternity,
+was but a momentary pang, like having a tooth drawn for the
+toothache.&nbsp; Mr. Siftwell is a shrewd and clear-seeing man in
+points of theology, and I would trust a great deal to what he
+says, as I have not, at my advanced age, such a mind for the
+kittle crudities of polemical investigation that I had in my
+younger years, especially when I was a student in the Divinity
+Hall of Glasgow.</p>
+<p>It will be seen from all I have herein recorded, that, in the
+course of this year, there was a general resuscitation of
+religious sentiments; for what happened in my parish was but a
+type and index to the rest of the world.&nbsp; We had, however,
+one memorable that must stand by itself; for although neither
+death nor bloodshed happened, yet was it cause of the fear of
+both.</p>
+<p>A rumour reached us from the Clyde, that a French man-of-war
+had appeared in a Highland loch, and that all the Greenock
+volunteers had embarked in merchant vessels to bring her in for a
+prize.&nbsp; Our volunteers were just jumping and yowling, like
+chained dogs, to be at her too; but the colonel, Sir Hugh, would
+do nothing without orders from his superiors.&nbsp; Mr. Cayenne,
+though an aged man above seventy, was as bold as a lion, and came
+forth in the old garb of an American huntsman, like, as I was
+told, a Robin Hood in the play is; and it was just a sport to see
+him, feckless man, trying to march so crousely with his lean,
+shaking hands.&nbsp; But the whole affair proved a false alarm,
+and our men, when they heard it, were as well pleased that they
+had been constrained to sleep in their warm beds at home, instead
+of lying on coils of cables, like the gallant Greenock
+sharp-shooters.</p>
+<h2><a name="page259"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+259</span>CHAPTER XLVI<br />
+YEAR 1805</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">For</span> some time I had meditated a
+reformation in the parish, and this year I carried the same into
+effect.&nbsp; I had often noticed with concern, that, out of a
+mistaken notion of paying respect to the dead, my people were
+wont to go to great lengths at their burials, and dealt round
+short-bread and sugar-biscuit, with wine and other confections,
+as if there had been no ha&rsquo;d in their hands; which
+straitened many a poor family, making the dispensation of the
+Lord a heavier temporal calamity than it should naturally have
+been.&nbsp; Accordingly, on consulting with Mrs. Balwhidder, who
+has a most judicious judgment, it was thought that my
+interference would go a great way to lighten the evil.&nbsp; I
+therefore advised with those whose friends were taken from them,
+not to make that amplitude of preparation which used to be the
+fashion, nor to continue handing about as long as the folk would
+take, but only at the very most to go no more than three times
+round with the service.&nbsp; Objections were made to this, as if
+it would be thought mean; but I put on a stern visage, and told
+them, that if they did more I would rise up, and rebuke and
+forbid the extravagance.&nbsp; So three services became the
+uttermost modicum at all burials.&nbsp; This was doing much, but
+it was not all that I wished to do.</p>
+<p>I considered that the best reformations are those which
+proceed step by step, and stop at that point where the consent to
+what has been established becomes general; and so I governed
+myself, and therefore interfered no farther; but I was determined
+to set an example.&nbsp; Accordingly, at the very next dregy,
+after I partook of one service, I made a bow to the servitors and
+they passed on, but all before me had partaken of the second
+service; some, however, of those after me did as I did, so I
+foresaw that in a quiet canny way I would bring in the fashion of
+being satisfied with one service.&nbsp; I therefore, from that
+time, always took my place as near as possible to the door, where
+the chief mourner sat, and made a point of nodding away the
+second service, which has now grown into a custom, to the great
+advantage of surviving relations.</p>
+<p>But in this reforming business I was not altogether pleased
+with our poet; for he took a pawkie view of my endeavours, and
+indited a ballad on the subject, in the which he makes a
+clattering carlin describe what took place, so as to turn a very
+solemn matter into a kind of derision.&nbsp; When he brought his
+verse and read it to me, I told him that I thought it was overly
+natural; for I could not find another term to designate the cause
+of the dissatisfaction that I had with it; but Mrs. Balwhidder
+said that it might help my plan if it were made public; so upon
+her advice we got some of Mr. Lorimore&rsquo;s best writers to
+make copies of it for distribution, which was not without fruit
+and influence.&nbsp; But a sore thing happened at the very next
+burial.&nbsp; As soon as the nodding away of the second service
+began, I could see that the gravity of the whole meeting was
+discomposed; and some of the irreverent young chiels almost broke
+out into even-down laughter, which vexed me exceedingly.&nbsp;
+Mrs. Balwhidder, howsoever, comforted me by saying, that custom
+in time would make it familiar, and by-and-by the thing would
+pass as a matter of course, until one service would be all that
+folk would offer; and truly the thing is coming to that, for only
+two services are now handed round, and the second is regularly
+nodded by.</p>
+<h2><a name="page262"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+262</span>CHAPTER XLVII<br />
+YEAR 1806</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">Mr. Cayenne</span> of Wheatrig having for
+several years been in a declining way, partly brought on by the
+consuming fire of his furious passion, and partly by the decay of
+old age, sent for me on the evening of the first Sabbath of March
+in this year.&nbsp; I was surprised at the message, and went to
+the Wheatrig House directly, where, by the lights in the windows
+as I gaed up through the policy to the door, I saw something
+extraordinary was going on.&nbsp; Sambo, the blackamoor servant,
+opened the door, and, without speaking, shook his head; for it
+was an affectionate creature, and as fond of his master as if he
+had been his own father.&nbsp; By this sign I guessed that the
+old gentleman was thought to be drawing near his latter end; so I
+walked softly after Sambo up the stair, and was shown into the
+chamber where Mr. Cayenne, since he had been confined to the
+house, usually sat.&nbsp; His wife had been dead some years
+before.</p>
+<p>Mr. Cayenne was sitting in his easy chair, with a white cotton
+nightcap on his head, and a pillow at his shoulders to keep him
+straight.&nbsp; But his head had fallen down on his breast, and
+he breathed like a panting baby.&nbsp; His legs were swelled, and
+his feet rested on a footstool.&nbsp; His face, which was wont to
+be the colour of a peony rose, was of a yellow hue, with a patch
+of red on each cheek like a wafer; and his nose was shirpit and
+sharp, and of an unnatural purple.&nbsp; Death was evidently
+fighting with nature for the possession of the body.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;Heaven have mercy on his soul!&rdquo; said I to myself, as
+I sat down beside him.</p>
+<p>When I had been seated some time, the power was given him to
+raise his head as it were a-jee; and he looked at me with the
+tail of his eye, which I saw was glittering and glassy.&nbsp;
+&ldquo;Doctor,&rdquo; for he always called me doctor, though I am
+not of that degree, &ldquo;I am glad to see you,&rdquo; were his
+words, uttered with some difficulty.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;How do you find yourself, sir?&rdquo; I replied, in a
+sympathising manner.</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Damned bad,&rdquo; said he, as if I had been the cause
+of his suffering.&nbsp; I was daunted to the very heart to hear
+him in such an unregenerate state; but after a short pause I
+addressed myself to him again, saying, that &ldquo;I hoped he
+would soon be more at ease; and he should bear in mind that the
+Lord chasteneth whom he loveth.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;The devil take such love!&rdquo; was his awful answer,
+which was to me as a blow on the forehead with a mell.&nbsp;
+However, I was resolved to do my duty to the miserable sinner,
+let him say what he would.&nbsp; Accordingly, I stooped towards
+him with my hands on my knees, and said in a compassionate voice,
+&ldquo;It&rsquo;s very true, sir, that you are in great agony;
+but the goodness of God is without bound.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>&ldquo;Curse me if I think so, doctor!&rdquo; replied the
+dying uncircumcised Philistine.&nbsp; But he added at whiles, his
+breathlessness being grievous, and often broken by a sore hiccup,
+&ldquo;I am, however, no saint, as you know, doctor; so I wish
+you to put in a word for me, doctor; for you know that in these
+times, doctor, it is the duty of every good subject to die a
+Christian.&rdquo;</p>
+<p>This was a poor account of the state of his soul; but it was
+plain I could make no better o&rsquo;t, by entering into any
+religious discourse or controversy with him, he being then in the
+last gasp; so I knelt down and prayed for him with great
+sincerity, imploring the Lord, as an awakening sense of grace to
+the dying man, that it would please him to lift up, though it
+were but for the season of a minute, the chastening hand which
+was laid so heavily upon his aged servant; at which Mr. Cayenne,
+as if, indeed, the hand had been then lifted, cried out,
+&ldquo;None of that stuff, doctor; you know that I cannot call
+myself his servant.&rdquo;</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">
+<a href="images/p264b.jpg">
+<img alt=
+"The Ruling Elder"
+title=
+"The Ruling Elder"
+ src="images/p264s.jpg" />
+</a></p>
+<p>Was ever a minister in his prayer so broken in upon by a
+perishing sinner!&nbsp; However, I had the weight of a duty upon
+me, and made no reply, but continued, &ldquo;Thou hearest, O
+Lord, how he confesses his unworthiness!&nbsp; Let not thy
+compassion, therefore, be withheld, but verify to him the words
+that I have spoken in faith, of the boundlessness of thy
+goodness, and the infinite multitude of thy tender
+mercies.&rdquo;&nbsp; I then calmly, but sadly, sat down, and
+presently, as if my prayer had been heard, relief was granted;
+for Mr. Cayenne raised his head, and giving me a queer look,
+said, &ldquo;That last clause of your petition, doctor, was well
+put, and I think, too, it has been granted, for I am
+easier&rdquo;&mdash;adding, &ldquo;I have no doubt, doctor, given
+much offence in the world, and oftenest when I meant to do good;
+but I have wilfully injured no man; and as God is my judge, and
+his goodness, you say, is so great, he may, perhaps, take my soul
+into his holy keeping.&rdquo;&nbsp; In saying which words, Mr.
+Cayenne dropped his head upon his breast, his breathing ceased,
+and he was wafted away out of this world with as little trouble
+as a blameless baby.</p>
+<p>This event soon led to a change among us.&nbsp; In the
+settling of Mr. Cayenne&rsquo;s affairs in the Cotton-mill
+Company, it was found that he had left such a power of money,
+that it was needful to the concern, in order that they might
+settle with the doers under his testament, to take in other
+partners.&nbsp; By this Mr. Speckle came to be a resident in the
+parish, he having taken up a portion of Mr. Cayenne&rsquo;s
+share.&nbsp; He likewise took a tack of the house and policy of
+Wheatrig.&nbsp; But although Mr. Speckle was a far more
+conversible man than his predecessor, and had a wonderful
+plausibility in business, the affairs of the company did not
+thrive in his hands.&nbsp; Some said this was owing to his having
+owre many irons in the fire; others, to the circumstances of the
+times: in my judgment, however, both helped; but the issue
+belongs to the events of another year.&nbsp; In the meanwhile, I
+should here note, that in the course of this current Ann. Dom. it
+pleased Heaven to visit me with a severe trial; the nature of
+which I will here record at length&mdash;the upshot I will make
+known hereafter.</p>
+<p>From the planting of inhabitants in the cotton-mill town of
+Cayenneville, or as the country folk, not used to used to such
+lang-nebbit words, now call it, Canaille, there had come in upon
+the parish various sectarians among the weavers, some of whom
+were not satisfied with the gospel as I preached it, and
+endeavoured to practise it in my walk and conversation; and they
+began to speak of building a kirk for themselves, and of getting
+a minster that would give them the gospel more to their own
+ignorant fancies.&nbsp; I was exceedingly wroth and disturbed
+when the thing was first mentioned to me; and I very earnestly,
+from the pulpit, next Lord&rsquo;s day, lectured on the growth of
+newfangled doctrines; which, however, instead of having the
+wonted effect of my discourses, set up the theological weavers in
+a bleeze, and the very Monday following they named a committee,
+to raise money by subscription to build a meeting-house.&nbsp;
+This was the first overt act of insubordination, collectively
+manifested, in the parish; and it was conducted with all that
+crafty dexterity with which the infidel and jacobin spirit of the
+French Revolution had corrupted the honest simplicity of our good
+old hameward fashions.&nbsp; In the course of a very short time,
+the Canaille folk had raised a large sum, and seduced not a few
+of my people into their schism, by which they were enabled to set
+about building their kirk; the foundations thereof were not,
+however, laid till the following year, but their proceedings gave
+me a het heart, for they were like an open rebellion to my
+authority, and a contemptuous disregard of that religious
+allegiance which is due from the flock to the pastor.</p>
+<p>On Christmas-day the wind broke off the main arm of our Adam
+and Eve pear-tree; and I grieved for it more as a type and sign
+of the threatened partition, than on account of the damage,
+though the fruit was the juiciest in all the country side.</p>
+<h2><a name="page268"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+268</span>CHAPTER XLVIII<br />
+YEAR 1807</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> was a year to me of
+satisfaction in many points; for a greater number of my younger
+flock married in it, than had done for any one of ten years
+prior.&nbsp; They were chiefly the offspring of the marriages
+that took place at the close of the American war; and I was
+pleased to see the duplification of well-doing, as I think
+marrying is, having always considered the command to increase and
+multiply, a holy ordinance, which the circumstances of this world
+but too often interfere to prevent.</p>
+<p>It was also made manifest to me, that in this year there was a
+very general renewal in the hearts of men, of a sense of the
+utility, even in earthly affairs, of a religious life: in some, I
+trust it was more than prudence, and really a birth of
+grace.&nbsp; Whether this was owing to the upshot of the French
+Revolution, all men being pretty well satisfied in their minds,
+that uproar and rebellion make but an ill way of righting wrongs,
+or that the swarm of unruly youth the offspring, as I have said,
+of the marriages after the American war, had grown sobered from
+their follies, and saw things in a better light, I cannot take
+upon me to say.&nbsp; But it was very edifying to me, their
+minister, to see several lads who had been both wild and free in
+their principles, marrying with sobriety, and taking their wives
+to the kirk with the comely decorum of heads of families.</p>
+<p>But I was now growing old, and could go seldomer out among my
+people than in former days; so that I was less a partaker of
+their ploys and banquets, either at birth, bridal, or
+burial.&nbsp; I heard, however, all that went on at them, and I
+made it a rule, after giving the blessing at the end of the
+ceremony, to admonish the bride and bridegroom to ca&rsquo;
+canny, and join trembling with their mirth.&nbsp; It behoved me
+on one occasion, however, to break through a rule that age and
+frailty had imposed upon me, and to go to the wedding of Tibby
+Banes, the daughter of the betheral, because she had once been a
+servant in the manse, besides the obligation upon me, from her
+father&rsquo;s part both in the kirk and kirkyard.&nbsp; Mrs.
+Balwhidder went with me, for she liked to countenance the
+pleasantries of my people; and, over and above all, it was a
+pay-wedding, in order to set up the bridegroom in a shop.</p>
+<p>There was, to be sure, a great multitude, gentle and semple,
+of all denominations, with two fiddles and a bass, and the
+volunteers&rsquo; fife and drum; and the jollity that went on was
+a perfect feast of itself, though the wedding-supper was a
+prodigy of abundance.&nbsp; The auld carles kecklet with fainness
+as they saw the young dancers; and the carlins sat on forms, as
+mim as May puddocks, with their shawls pinned apart, to show
+their muslin napkins.&nbsp; But, after supper, when they had got
+a glass of the punch, their heels showed their mettle, and
+grannies danced with their oyes, holding out their hands as if
+they had been spinning with two rocks.&nbsp; I told Colin Mavis,
+the poet, than an <i>Infare</i> was a fine subject for his muse;
+and soon after he indited an excellent ballad under that title,
+which he projects to publish, with other ditties, by
+subscription; and I have no doubt a liberal and discerning public
+will give him all manner of encouragement, for that is the food
+of talent of every kind; and without cheering, no one can say
+what an author&rsquo;s faculty naturally is.</p>
+<h2><a name="page271"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+271</span>CHAPTER XLIX<br />
+YEAR 1808</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">Through</span> all the wars that have
+raged from the time of the King&rsquo;s accession to the throne,
+there has been a gradually coming nearer and nearer to our gates,
+which is a very alarming thing to think of.&nbsp; In the first,
+at the time he came to the crown, we suffered nothing.&nbsp; Not
+one belonging to the parish was engaged in the battles thereof;
+and the news of victories, before they reached us, which was
+generally by word of mouth, were old tales.&nbsp; In the American
+war, as I have related at length, we had an immediate
+participation; but those that suffered were only a few
+individuals, and the evil was done at a distance, and reached us
+not until the worst of its effects were spent.&nbsp; And during
+the first term of the present just and necessary contest for all
+that is dear to us as a people, although, by the offswarming of
+some of our restless youth, we had our part and portion in common
+with the rest of the Christian world; yet still there was at home
+a great augmentation of prosperity, and every thing had thriven
+in a surprising manner; somewhat, however, to the detriment of
+our country simplicity.&nbsp; By the building of the cotton-mill,
+and the rising up of the new town of Cayenneville, we had
+intromitted so much with concerns of trade, that we were become a
+part of the great web of commercial reciprocities, and felt in
+our corner and extremity, every touch or stir that was made on
+any part of the texture.&nbsp; The consequence of this I have now
+to relate.</p>
+<p>Various rumours had been floating about the business of the
+cotton manufacturers not being so lucrative as it had been; and
+Bonaparte, as it is well known, was a perfect limb of Satan
+against our prosperity, having recourse to the most wicked means
+and purposes to bring ruin upon us as a nation.&nbsp; His
+cantrips, in this year, began to have a dreadful effect.</p>
+<p>For some time it had been observed in the parish, that Mr.
+Specle of the cotton-mill, went very often to Glasgow, and was
+sometimes off at a few minutes&rsquo; warning to London; and the
+neighbours began to guess and wonder at what could be the cause
+of all this running here, and riding there, as if the little-gude
+was at his heels.&nbsp; Sober folk augured ill o&rsquo;t; and it
+was remarked, likewise, that there was a haste and confusion in
+his mind, which betokened a foretaste of some change of
+fortune.&nbsp; At last, in the fulness of time, the babe was
+born.</p>
+<p>On a Saturday night, Mr. Speckle came out late from Glasgow;
+on the Sabbath he was with all his family at the kirk, looking as
+a man that had changed his way of life; and on the Monday, when
+the spinners went to the mill, they were told that the company
+had stopped payment.&nbsp; Never did a thunder-clap daunt the
+heart like this news; for the bread in a moment was snatched from
+more than a thousand mouths.&nbsp; It was a scene not to be
+described, to see the cotton-spinners and the weavers, with their
+wives and children, standing in bands along the road, all looking
+and speaking as if they had lost a dear friend or parent.&nbsp;
+For my part, I could not bear the sight, but hid myself in my
+closet, and prayed to the Lord to mitigate a calamity which
+seemed to me past the capacity of man to remedy; for what could
+our parish fund do in the way of helping a whole town, thus
+suddenly thrown out of bread?</p>
+<p>In the evening, however, I was strengthened, and convened the
+elders at the manse to consult with them on what was best to be
+done; for it was well known that the sufferers had made no
+provision for a sore foot.&nbsp; But all our gathered judgments
+could determine nothing; and therefore we resolved to wait the
+issue, not doubting but that He who sends the night, would bring
+the day in His good and gracious time, which so fell out.&nbsp;
+Some of them who had the largest experience of such vicissitudes,
+immediately began to pack up their ends and their awls, and to
+hie them into Glasgow and Paisley in quest of employ; but those
+who trusted to the hopes that Mr. Speckle himself still
+cherished, lingered long, and were obligated to submit to sore
+distress.&nbsp; After a time, however, it was found that the
+company was ruined; and the mill being sold for the benefit of
+the creditors, it was bought by another Glasgow company, who, by
+getting a good bargain, and managing well, have it still, and
+have made it again a blessing to the country.&nbsp; At the time
+of the stoppage, however, we saw that commercial prosperity,
+flush as it might be, was but a perishable commodity, and from
+thence, both by public discourse and private exhortation, I have
+recommended to the workmen to lay up something for a reverse; and
+showed that, by doing with their bawbees and pennies what the
+great do with their pounds, they might in time get a pose to help
+them in the day of need.&nbsp; This advice they have followed,
+and made up a Savings Bank, which is a pillow of comfort to many
+an industrious head of a family.</p>
+<p>But I should not close this account of the disaster that
+befell Mr. Speckle, and the cotton-mill company, without relating
+a very melancholy case that was the consequence.&nbsp; Among the
+overseers there was a Mr. Dwining, an Englishman from Manchester,
+where he had seen better days, having had himself there of his
+own property, once as large a mill, according to report, as the
+Cayenneville mill.&nbsp; He was certainly a man above the common,
+and his wife was a lady in every point; but they held themselves
+by themselves, and shunned all manner of civility, giving up
+their whole attention to their two little boys, who were really
+like creatures of a better race than the callans of our
+clachan.</p>
+<p>On the failure of the company, Mr. Dwining was observed by
+those who were present to be particularly distressed: his salary
+being his all; but he said little, and went thoughtfully
+home.&nbsp; Some days after he was seen walking by himself with a
+pale face, a heavy eye, and slow step&mdash;all tokens of a
+sorrowful heart.&nbsp; Soon after, he was missed altogether;
+nobody saw him.&nbsp; The door of his house was however open, and
+his two pretty boys were as lively as usual, on the green before
+the door.&nbsp; I happened to pass when they were there, and I
+asked them how their father and mother were.&nbsp; They said they
+were still in bed, and would not waken, and the innocent lambs
+took me by the hand, to make me waken their parents.&nbsp; I know
+not what was in it, but I trembled from head to foot, and I was
+led in by the babies, as if I had not the power to resist.&nbsp;
+Never shall I forget what I saw in that bed.</p>
+<p style="text-align: center">* * * * *</p>
+<p>I found a letter on the table; and I came away, locking the
+door behind me, and took the lovely prattling orphans home.&nbsp;
+I could but shake my head and weep, as I gave them to the care of
+Mrs. Balwhidder, and she was terrified but said nothing.&nbsp; I
+then read the letter.&nbsp; It was to send the bairns to a
+gentleman, their uncle, in London.&nbsp; Oh! it is a terrible
+tale; but the winding-sheet and the earth is over it.&nbsp; I
+sent for two of my elders.&nbsp; I related what I had seen.&nbsp;
+Two coffins were got, and the bodies laid in them; and the next
+day, with one of the fatherless bairns in each hand, I followed
+them to the grave, which was dug in that part of the kirkyard
+where unchristened babies are laid.&nbsp; We durst not take it
+upon us to do more; but few knew the reason, and some thought it
+was because the deceased were strangers, and had no regular
+lair.</p>
+<p>I dressed the two bonny orphans in the best mourning at my own
+cost, and kept them in the manse till we could get an answer from
+their uncle, to whom I sent their father&rsquo;s letter.&nbsp; It
+stung him to the quick, and he came down all the way from London,
+and took the children away himself.&nbsp; Oh! he was a vexed man
+when the beautiful bairns, on being told he was their uncle, ran
+into his arms, and complained that their papa and mamma had slept
+so long, that they would never waken.</p>
+<h2><a name="page277"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+277</span>CHAPTER L<br />
+YEAR 1809</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">As</span> I come towards the events of
+these latter days, I am surprised to find myself not at all so
+distinct in my recollection of them as in those of the first of
+my ministry; being apt to confound the things of one occasion
+with those of another, which Mrs. Balwhidder says is an
+admonishment to me to leave off my writing.&nbsp; But, please
+God, I will endeavour to fulfil this as I have through life
+tried, to the best of my capacity, to do every other duty; and,
+with the help of Mrs. Balwhidder, who has a very clear
+understanding, I think I may get through my task in a creditable
+manner, which is all I aspire after; not writing for a vain
+world, but only to testify to posterity anent the great changes
+that have happened in my day and generation&mdash;a period which
+all the best-informed writers say, has not had its match in the
+history of the world since the beginning of time.</p>
+<p>By the failure of the cotton-mill company, whose affairs were
+not settled till the spring of this year, there was great
+suffering during the winter; but my people, those that still
+adhered to the establishment, bore their share of the
+dispensation with meekness and patience, nor was there wanting
+edifying monuments of resignation even among the stravaigers.</p>
+<p>On the day that the Canaille Meeting-house was opened, which
+was in the summer, I was smitten to the heart to see the empty
+seats that were in my kirk; for all the thoughtless, and some
+that I had a better opinion of, went to hear the opening
+discourse.&nbsp; Satan that day had power given to him to buffet
+me as he did Job of old; and when I looked around and saw the
+empty seats, my corruption rose, and I forgot myself in the
+remembering prayer; for when I prayed for all denominations of
+Christians, and worshippers, and infidels, I could not speak of
+the schismatics with patience, but entreated the Lord to do with
+the hobleshow at Cayenneville, as he saw meet in his displeasure,
+the which, when I came afterwards to think upon, I grieved at
+with a sore contrition.</p>
+<p>In the course of the week following, the elders, in a body,
+came to me in the manse, and after much commendation of my godly
+ministry, they said, that seeing I was now growing old, they
+thought they could not testify their respect for me in a better
+manner than by agreeing to get me a helper.&nbsp; But I would not
+at that time listen to such a proposal, for I felt no falling off
+in my powers of preaching; on the contrary, I found myself
+growing better at it, as I was enabled to hold forth, in an easy
+manner, often a whole half hour longer, than I could do a dozen
+years before.&nbsp; Therefore nothing was done in this year anent
+my resignation; but during the winter, Mrs. Balwhidder was often
+grieved, in the bad weather, that I should preach, and, in short,
+so worked upon my affections, that I began to think it was
+fitting for me to comply with the advice of my friends.&nbsp;
+Accordingly, in the course of the winter, the elders began to
+cast about for a helper; and during the bleak weather in the
+ensuing spring, several young men spared me from the necessity of
+preaching.&nbsp; But this relates to the concerns of the next and
+last year of my ministry.&nbsp; So I will now proceed to give an
+account of it, very thankful that I have been permitted, in
+unmolested tranquillity, to bring my history to such a point.</p>
+<h2><a name="page280"></a><span class="pagenum">p.
+280</span>CHAPTER LI<br />
+YEAR 1810</h2>
+<p><span class="smcap">My</span> tasks are all near a close; and
+in writing this final record of my ministry, the very sound of my
+pen admonishes me that my life is a burden on the back of flying
+Time, that he will soon be obliged to lay down in his great
+storehouse&mdash;the grave.&nbsp; Old age has, indeed, long
+warned me to prepare for rest; and the darkened windows of my
+sight show that the night is coming on, while deafness, like a
+door fast barred, has shut out all the pleasant sounds of this
+world, and inclosed me, as it were, in a prison, even from the
+voices of my friends.</p>
+<p>I have lived longer than the common lot of man, and I have
+seen, in my time, many mutations and turnings, and ups and downs,
+notwithstanding the great spread that has been in our national
+prosperity.&nbsp; I have beheld them that were flourishing like
+the green bay-trees, made desolate, and their branches
+scattered.&nbsp; But, in my own estate, I have had a large and
+liberal experience of goodness.</p>
+<p>At the beginning of my ministry I was reviled and rejected;
+but my honest endeavours to prove a faithful shepherd were
+blessed from on high, and rewarded with the affection of my
+flock.&nbsp; Perhaps, in the vanity of doting old age, I thought
+in this there was a merit due to myself, which made the Lord to
+send the chastisement of the Canaille schism among my people; for
+I was then wroth without judgment, and by my heat hastened into
+an open division the flaw that a more considerate manner might
+have healed.&nbsp; But I confess my fault, and submit my cheek to
+the smiter; and now I see that the finger of Wisdom was in that
+probation, and it was far better that the weavers meddled with
+the things of God, which they could not change, than with those
+of the King, which they could only harm.&nbsp; In that matter,
+however, I was like our gracious monarch in the American war; for
+though I thereby lost the pastoral allegiance of a portion of my
+people, in like manner as he did of his American subjects, yet,
+after the separation, I was enabled so to deport myself, that
+they showed me many voluntary testimonies of affectionate
+respect, and which it would be a vain glory in me to rehearse
+here.&nbsp; One thing I must record, because it is as much to
+their honour as it is to mine.</p>
+<p>When it was known that I was to preach my last sermon, every
+one of those who had been my hearers, and who had seceded to the
+Canaille meeting, made it a point that day to be in the parish
+kirk, and to stand in the crowd, that made a lane of reverence
+for me to pass from the kirk-door to the back-yett of the
+manse.&nbsp; And shortly after, a deputation of all their
+brethren, with their minister at their head, came to me one
+morning, and presented to me a server of silver, in token, as
+they were pleased to say, of their esteem for my blameless life,
+and the charity that I had practised towards the poor of all
+sects in the neighbourhood; which is set forth in a well-penned
+inscription, written by a weaver lad that works for his daily
+bread.&nbsp; Such a thing would have been a prodigy at the
+beginning of my ministry; but the progress of book-learning and
+education has been wonderful since, and with it has come a spirit
+of greater liberality than the world knew before, bringing men of
+adverse principles and doctrines into a more humane communion
+with each other; showing that it&rsquo;s by the mollifying
+influence of knowledge the time will come to pass, when the tiger
+of papistry shall lie down with the lamb of reformation, and the
+vultures of prelacy be as harmless as the presbyterian doves;
+when the independent, the anabaptist, and every other order and
+denomination of Christians, not forgetting even those poor wee
+wrens of the Lord, the burghers and anti-burghers, who will pick
+from the hand of patronage, and dread no snare.</p>
+<p>On the next Sunday, after my farewell discourse, I took the
+arm of Mrs. Balwhidder, and with my cane in my hand, walked to
+our own pew, where I sat some time; but, owing to my deafness,
+not being able to hear, I have not since gone back to the
+church.&nbsp; But my people are fond of having their weans still
+christened by me, and the young folk, such as are of a serious
+turn, come to be married at my hands, believing, as they say,
+that there is something good in the blessing of an aged gospel
+minister.&nbsp; But even this remnant of my gown I must lay
+aside; for Mrs. Balwhidder is now and then obliged to stop me in
+my prayers, as I sometimes wander&mdash;pronouncing the baptismal
+blessing upon a bride and bridegroom, talking as if they were
+already parents.&nbsp; I am thankful, however, that I have been
+spared with a sound mind to write this book to the end; but it is
+my last task, and, indeed, really I have no more to say, saving
+only to wish a blessing on all people from on high, where I soon
+hope to be, and to meet there all the old and long-departed sheep
+of my flock, especially the first and second Mrs.
+Balwhidders.</p>
+<h2>FOOTNOTES.</h2>
+<p><a name="footnote1"></a><a href="#citation1"
+class="footnote">[1]</a>&nbsp; Dreghorn, Ayrshire, two miles from
+Irvine.</p>
+<p><a name="footnote9"></a><a href="#citation9"
+class="footnote">[9]</a>&nbsp; Irvine, Ayrshire.</p>
+<p><a name="footnote17"></a><a href="#citation17"
+class="footnote">[17]</a>&nbsp; Cognac.</p>
+<p>***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ANNALS OF THE PARISH***</p>
+<pre>
+
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+*END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END*
+
+
+
+
+
+ANNALS OF THE PARISH
+Or The Chronicle of Dalmailing during the ministry of the Rev. Micah
+Balwhidder. Written by himself and arranged and edited by John Galt
+
+
+
+
+INTRODUCTION
+
+
+
+In the same year, and on the same day of the same month, that his
+Sacred Majesty King George, the third of the name, came to his crown
+and kingdom, I was placed and settled as the minister of Dalmailing.
+{1} When about a week thereafter this was known in the parish, it
+was thought a wonderful thing, and everybody spoke of me and the new
+king as united in our trusts and temporalities, marvelling how the
+same should come to pass, and thinking the hand of Providence was in
+it, and that surely we were preordained to fade and flourish in
+fellowship together; which has really been the case: for in the
+same season that his Most Excellent Majesty, as he was very properly
+styled in the proclamations for the general fasts and thanksgivings,
+was set by as a precious vessel which had received a crack or a
+flaw, and could only be serviceable in the way of an ornament, I was
+obliged, by reason of age and the growing infirmities of my
+recollection, to consent to the earnest entreaties of the Session,
+and to accept of Mr Amos to be my helper. I was long reluctant to
+do so; but the great respect that my people had for me, and the love
+that I bore towards them, over and above the sign that was given to
+me in the removal of the royal candle-stick from its place, worked
+upon my heart and understanding, and I could not stand out. So, on
+the last Sabbath of the year 1810, I preached my last sermon, and it
+was a moving discourse. There were few dry eyes in the kirk that
+day; for I had been with the aged from the beginning--the young
+considered me as their natural pastor--and my bidding them all
+farewell was, as when of old among the heathen, an idol was taken
+away by the hands of the enemy.
+
+At the close of the worship, and before the blessing, I addressed
+them in a fatherly manner; and, although the kirk was fuller than
+ever I saw it before, the fall of a pin might have been heard--at
+the conclusion there was a sobbing and much sorrow. I said,
+
+"My dear friends, I have now finished my work among you for ever. I
+have often spoken to you from this place the words of truth and
+holiness; and, had it been in poor frail human nature to practise
+the advice and counselling that I have given in this pulpit to you,
+there would not need to be any cause for sorrow on this occasion--
+the close and latter end of my ministry. But, nevertheless, I have
+no reason to complain; and it will be my duty to testify, in that
+place where I hope we are all one day to meet again, that I found
+you a docile and a tractable flock, far more than at first I could
+have expected. There are among you still a few, but with grey heads
+and feeble hands now, that can remember the great opposition that
+was made to my placing, and the stout part they themselves took in
+the burly, because I was appointed by the patron; but they have
+lived to see the error of their way, and to know that preaching is
+the smallest portion of the duties of a faithful minister. I may
+not, my dear friends, have applied my talent in the pulpit so
+effectually as perhaps I might have done, considering the gifts that
+it pleased God to give me in that way, and the education that I had
+in the Orthodox University of Glasgow, as it was in the time of my
+youth; nor can I say that, in the works of peace-making and charity,
+I have done all that I should have done. But I have done my best,
+studying no interest but the good that was to rise according to the
+faith in Christ Jesus.
+
+"To my young friends I would, as a parting word, say, look to the
+lives and conversation of your parents--they were plain, honest, and
+devout Christians, fearing God and honouring the King. They
+believed the Bible was the word of God; and, when they practised its
+precepts, they found, by the good that came from them, that it was
+truly so. They bore in mind the tribulation and persecution of
+their forefathers for righteousness' sake, and were thankful for the
+quiet and protection of the government in their day and generation.
+Their land was tilled with industry, and they ate the bread of
+carefulness with a contented spirit, and, verily, they had the
+reward of well-doing even in this world; for they beheld on all
+sides the blessing of God upon the nation, and the tree growing, and
+the plough going where the banner of the oppressor was planted of
+old, and the war-horse trampled in the blood of martyrs. Reflect on
+this, my young friends, and know, that the best part of a
+Christian's duty in this world of much evil, is to thole and suffer
+with resignation, as lang as it is possible for human nature to do.
+I do not counsel passive obedience: that is a doctrine that the
+Church of Scotland can never abide; but the divine right of
+resistance, which, in the days of her trouble, she so bravely
+asserted against popish and prelatic usurpations, was never resorted
+to till the attempt was made to remove the ark of the tabernacle
+from her. I therefore counsel you, my young friends, not to lend
+your ears to those that trumpet forth their hypothetical politics;
+but to believe that the laws of the land are administered with a
+good intent, till in your own homes and dwellings ye feel the
+presence of the oppressor--then, and not till then, are ye free to
+gird your loins for battle--and woe to him, and woe to the land
+where that is come to, if the sword be sheathed till the wrong be
+redressed.
+
+"As for you, my old companions, many changes have we seen in our
+day; but the change that we ourselves are soon to undergo will be
+the greatest of all. We have seen our bairns grow to manhood--we
+have seen the beauty of youth pass away--we have felt our backs
+become unable for the burthen, and our right hand forget its
+cunning.--Our eyes have become dim, and our heads grey--we are now
+tottering with short and feckless steps towards the grave; and some,
+that should have been here this day, are bed-rid, lying, as it were,
+at the gates of death, like Lazarus at the threshold of the rich
+man's door, full of ails and sores, and having no enjoyment but in
+the hope that is in hereafter. What can I say to you but farewell!
+Our work is done--we are weary and worn out, and in need of rest--
+may the rest of the blessed be our portion!--and in the sleep that
+all must sleep, beneath the cold blanket of the kirkyard grass, and
+on that clay pillow where we must shortly lay our heads, may we have
+pleasant dreams, till we are awakened to partake of the everlasting
+banquet of the saints in glory!"
+
+When I had finished, there was for some time a great solemnity
+throughout the kirk; and, before giving the blessing, I sat down to
+compose myself, for my heart was big, and my spirit oppressed with
+sadness.
+
+As I left the pulpit, all the elders stood on the steps to hand me
+down, and the tear was in every eye, and they helped me into the
+session-house; but I could not speak to them, nor them to me. Then
+Mr Dalziel, who was always a composed and sedate man, said a few
+words of prayer, and I was comforted therewith, and rose to go home
+to the manse; but in the churchyard all the congregation was
+assembled, young and old, and they made a lane for me to the back-
+yett that opened into the manse-garden--Some of them put out their
+hands and touched me as I passed, followed by the elders, and some
+of them wept. It was as if I was passing away, and to be no more--
+verily, it was the reward of my ministry--a faithful account of
+which, year by year, I now sit down, in the evening of my days, to
+make up, to the end that I may bear witness to the work of a
+beneficent Providence, even in the narrow sphere of my parish, and
+the concerns of that flock of which it was His most gracious
+pleasure to make me the unworthy shepherd.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I YEAR 1760
+
+
+
+The Anno Domini one thousand seven hundred and sixty, was remarkable
+for three things in the parish of Dalmailing.--First and foremost,
+there was my placing; then the coming of Mrs Malcolm with her five
+children to settle among us; and next, my marriage upon my own
+cousin, Miss Betty Lanshaw, by which the account of this year
+naturally divides itself into three heads or portions.
+
+First, of the placing.--It was a great affair; for I was put in by
+the patron, and the people knew nothing whatsoever of me, and their
+hearts were stirred into strife on the occasion, and they did all
+that lay within the compass of their power to keep me out, insomuch,
+that there was obliged to be a guard of soldiers to protect the
+presbytery; and it was a thing that made my heart grieve when I
+heard the drum beating and the fife playing as we were going to the
+kirk. The people were really mad and vicious, and flung dirt upon
+us as we passed, and reviled us all, and held out the finger of
+scorn at me; but I endured it with a resigned spirit,
+compassionating their wilfulness and blindness. Poor old Mr
+Kilfuddy of the Braehill got such a clash of glar on the side of his
+face, that his eye was almost extinguished.
+
+When we got to the kirk door, it was found to be nailed up, so as by
+no possibility to be opened. The sergeant of the soldiers wanted to
+break it, but I was afraid that the heritors would grudge and
+complain of the expense of a new door, and I supplicated him to let
+it be as it was: we were, therefore, obligated to go in by a
+window, and the crowd followed us in the most unreverent manner,
+making the Lord's house like an inn on a fair day, with their
+grievous yellyhooing. During the time of the psalm and the sermon,
+they behaved themselves better, but when the induction came on,
+their clamour was dreadful; and Thomas Thorl, the weaver, a pious
+zealot in that time, he got up and protested, and said, "Verily,
+verily, I say unto you, he that entereth not by the door into the
+sheepfold, but climbeth up some other way, the same is a thief and a
+robber." And I thought I would have a hard and sore time of it with
+such an outstrapolous people. Mr Given, that was then the minister
+of Lugton, was a jocose man, and would have his joke even at a
+solemnity. When the laying of the hands upon me was adoing, he
+could not get near enough to put on his, but he stretched out his
+staff and touched my head, and said, to the great diversion of the
+rest, "This will do well enough, timber to timber;" but it was an
+unfriendly saying of Mr Given, considering the time and the place,
+and the temper of my people.
+
+After the ceremony, we then got out at the window, and it was a
+heavy day to me; but we went to the manse, and there we had an
+excellent dinner, which Mrs Watts of the new inns of Irville {2}
+prepared at my request, and sent her chaise-driver to serve, for he
+was likewise her waiter, she having then but one chaise, and that no
+often called for.
+
+But, although my people received me in this unruly manner, I was
+resolved to cultivate civility among them, and therefore, the very
+next morning I began a round of visitations; but, oh! it was a steep
+brae that I had to climb, and it needed a stout heart. For I found
+the doors in some places barred against me; in others, the bairns,
+when they saw me coming, ran crying to their mothers, "Here's the
+feckless Mess-John!" and then, when I went into the houses, their
+parents wouldna ask me to sit down, but with a scornful way, said,
+"Honest man, what's your pleasure here?" Nevertheless, I walked
+about from door to door like a dejected beggar, till I got the
+almous deed of a civil reception--and who would have thought it?--
+from no less a person than the same Thomas Thorl that was so bitter
+against me in the kirk on the foregoing day.
+
+Thomas was standing at the door with his green duffle apron, and his
+red Kilmarnock nightcap--I mind him as well as if it was but
+yesterday--and he had seen me going from house to house, and in what
+manner I was rejected, and his bowels were moved, and he said to me
+in a kind manner, "Come in, sir, and ease yoursel': this will never
+do, the clergy are God's gorbies, and for their Master's sake it
+behoves us to respect them. There was no ane in the whole parish
+mair against you than mysel'; but this early visitation is a symptom
+of grace that I couldna have expectit from a bird out the nest of
+patronage." I thanked Thomas, and went in with him, and we had some
+solid conversation together, and I told him that it was not so much
+the pastor's duty to feed the flock, as to herd them well; and that,
+although there might be some abler with the head than me, there
+wasna a he within the bounds of Scotland more willing to watch the
+fold by night and by day. And Thomas said he had not heard a mair
+sound observe for some time, and that, if I held to that doctrine in
+the poopit, it wouldna be lang till I would work a change.--"I was
+mindit," quoth he, "never to set my foot within the kirk door while
+you were there; but to testify, and no to condemn without a trial,
+I'll be there next Lord's day, and egg my neighbours to be likewise,
+so ye'll no have to preach just to the bare walls and the laird's
+family."
+
+I have now to speak of the coming of Mrs Malcolm.--She was the widow
+of a Clyde shipmaster, that was lost at sea with his vessel. She
+was a genty body, calm and methodical. From morning to night she
+sat at her wheel, spinning the finest lint, which suited well with
+her pale hands. She never changed her widow's weeds, and she was
+aye as if she had just been ta'en out of a bandbox. The tear was
+aften in her e'e when the bairns were at the school; but when they
+came home, her spirit was lighted up with gladness, although, poor
+woman, she had many a time very little to give them. They were,
+however, wonderful well-bred things, and took with thankfulness
+whatever she set before them; for they knew that their father, the
+breadwinner, was away, and that she had to work sore for their bit
+and drap. I dare say, the only vexation that ever she had from any
+of them, on their own account, was when Charlie, the eldest laddie,
+had won fourpence at pitch-and-toss at the school, which he brought
+home with a proud heart to his mother. I happened to be daunrin' by
+at the time, and just looked in at the door to say gude-night: it
+was a sad sight. There was she sitting with the silent tear on her
+cheek, and Charlie greeting as if he had done a great fault, and the
+other four looking on with sorrowful faces. Never, I am sure, did
+Charlie Malcolm gamble after that night.
+
+I often wondered what brought Mrs Malcolm to our clachan, instead of
+going to a populous town, where she might have taken up a huxtry-
+shop, as she was but of a silly constitution, the which would have
+been better for her than spinning from morning to far in the night,
+as if she was in verity drawing the thread of life. But it was, no
+doubt, from an honest pride to hide her poverty; for when her
+daughter Effie was ill with the measles--the poor lassie was very
+ill--nobody thought she could come through, and when she did get the
+turn, she was for many a day a heavy handful;--our session being
+rich, and nobody on it but cripple Tammy Daidles, that was at that
+time known through all the country side for begging on a horse, I
+thought it my duty to call upon Mrs Malcolm in a sympathising way,
+and offer her some assistance, but she refused it.
+
+"No, sir," said she, "I canna take help from the poor's-box,
+although it's very true that I am in great need; for it might
+hereafter be cast up to my bairns, whom it may please God to restore
+to better circumstances when I am no to see't; but I would fain
+borrow five pounds, and if, sir, you will write to Mr Maitland, that
+is now the Lord Provost of Glasgow, and tell him that Marion Shaw
+would be obliged to him for the lend of that soom, I think he will
+not fail to send it."
+
+I wrote the letter that night to Provost Maitland, and, by the
+retour of the post, I got an answer, with twenty pounds for Mrs
+Malcolm, saying, "That it was with sorrow he heard so small a trifle
+could be serviceable." When I took the letter and the money, which
+was in a bank-bill, she said, "This is just like himsel'." She then
+told me that Mr Maitland had been a gentleman's son of the east
+country, but driven out of his father's house, when a laddie, by his
+stepmother; and that he had served as a servant lad with her father,
+who was the Laird of Yillcogie, but ran through his estate, and left
+her, his only daughter, in little better than beggary with her
+auntie, the mother of Captain Malcolm, her husband that was.
+Provost Maitland in his servitude had ta'en a notion of her; and
+when he recovered his patrimony, and had become a great Glasgow
+merchant, on hearing how she was left by her father, he offered to
+marry her, but she had promised herself to her cousin the captain,
+whose widow she was. He then married a rich lady, and in time grew,
+as he was, Lord Provost of the city; but his letter with the twenty
+pounds to me, showed that he had not forgotten his first love. It
+was a short, but a well-written letter, in a fair hand of write,
+containing much of the true gentleman; and Mrs Malcolm said, "Who
+knows but out of the regard he once had for their mother, he may do
+something for my five helpless orphans."
+
+Thirdly, Upon the subject of taking my cousin, Miss Betty Lanshaw,
+for my first wife, I have little to say.--It was more out of a
+compassionate habitual affection, than the passion of love. We were
+brought up by our grandmother in the same house, and it was a thing
+spoken of from the beginning, that Betty and me were to be married.
+So, when she heard that the Laird of Breadland had given me the
+presentation of Dalmailing, she began to prepare for the wedding;
+and as soon as the placing was well over, and the manse in order, I
+gaed to Ayr, where she was, and we were quietly married, and came
+home in a chaise, bringing with us her little brother Andrew, that
+died in the East Indies, and he lived and was brought up by us.
+
+Now, this is all, I think, that happened in that year worthy of
+being mentioned, except that at the sacrament, when old Mr Kilfuddy
+was preaching in the tent, it came on such a thunder-plump, that
+there was not a single soul stayed in the kirkyard to hear him; for
+the which he was greatly mortified, and never after came to our
+preachings.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II YEAR 1761
+
+
+
+It was in this year that the great smuggling trade corrupted all the
+west coast, especially the laigh lands about the Troon and the
+Loans. The tea was going like the chaff, the brandy like well-
+water, and the wastrie of all things was terrible. There was
+nothing minded but the riding of cadgers by day, and excisemen by
+night--and battles between the smugglers and the king's men, both by
+sea and land. There was a continual drunkenness and debauchery; and
+our session, that was but on the lip of this whirlpool of iniquity,
+had an awful time o't. I did all that was in the power of nature to
+keep my people from the contagion: I preached sixteen times from
+the text, "Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's." I
+visited, and I exhorted; I warned, and I prophesied; I told them
+that, although the money came in like sclate stones, it would go
+like the snow off the dyke. But for all I could do, the evil got in
+among us, and we had no less than three contested bastard bairns
+upon our hands at one time, which was a thing never heard of in a
+parish of the shire of Ayr since the Reformation. Two of the
+bairns, after no small sifting and searching, we got fathered at
+last; but the third, that was by Meg Glaiks, and given to one Rab
+Rickerton, was utterly refused, though the fact was not denied; but
+he was a termagant fellow, and snappit his fingers at the elders.
+The next day he listed in the Scotch Greys, who were then quartered
+at Ayr, and we never heard more of him, but thought he had been
+slain in battle, till one of the parish, about three years since,
+went up to London to lift a legacy from a cousin that died among the
+Hindoos. When he was walking about, seeing the curiosities, and
+among others Chelsea Hospital, he happened to speak to some of the
+invalids, who found out from his tongue that he was a Scotchman; and
+speaking to the invalids, one of them, a very old man, with a grey
+head and a leg of timber, inquired what part of Scotland he was come
+from; and when he mentioned my parish, the invalid gave a great
+shout, and said he was from the same place himself; and who should
+this old man be, but the very identical Rab Rickerton, that was art
+and part in Meg Glaiks' disowned bairn. Then they had a long
+converse together, and he had come through many hardships, but had
+turned out a good soldier; and so, in his old days, was an indoor
+pensioner, and very comfortable; and he said that he had, to be
+sure, spent his youth in the devil's service, and his manhood in the
+king's, but his old age was given to that of his Maker, which I was
+blithe and thankful to hear; and he enquired about many a one in the
+parish, the blooming and the green of his time, but they were all
+dead and buried; and he had a contrite and penitent spirit, and read
+his Bible every day, delighting most in the Book of Joshua, the
+Chronicles, and the Kings.
+
+Before this year, the drinking of tea was little known in the
+parish, saving among a few of the heritors' houses on a Sabbath
+evening; but now it became very rife: yet the commoner sort did not
+like to let it be known that they were taking to the new luxury,
+especially the elderly women, who, for that reason, had their ploys
+in out-houses and by-places, just as the witches lang syne had their
+sinful possets and galravitchings; and they made their tea for
+common in the pint-stoup, and drank it out of caps and luggies, for
+there were but few among them that had cups and saucers. Well do I
+remember one night in harvest, in this very year, as I was taking my
+twilight dauner aneath the hedge along the back side of Thomas
+Thorl's yard, meditating on the goodness of Providence, and looking
+at the sheaves of victual on the field, that I heard his wife, and
+two three other carlins, with their Bohea in the inside of the
+hedge, and no doubt but it had a lacing of the conek, {3} for they
+were all cracking like pen-guns. But I gave them a sign, by a loud
+host, that Providence sees all, and it skailed the bike; for I heard
+them, like guilty creatures, whispering, and gathering up their
+truck-pots and trenchers, and cowering away home.
+
+It was in this year that Patrick Dilworth (he had been schoolmaster
+of the parish from the time, as his wife said, of Anna Regina, and
+before the Rexes came to the crown), was disabled by a paralytic,
+and the heritors, grudging the cost of another schoolmaster as long
+as he lived, would not allow the session to get his place supplied,
+which was a wrong thing, I must say, of them; for the children of
+the parishioners were obliged, therefore, to go to the neighbouring
+towns for their schooling, and the custom was to take a piece of
+bread and cheese in their pockets for dinner, and to return in the
+evening always voracious for more, the long walk helping the natural
+crave of their young appetites. In this way Mrs Malcolm's two
+eldest laddies, Charlie and Robert, were wont to go to Irville, and
+it was soon seen that they kept themselves aloof from the other
+callans in the clachan, and had a genteeler turn than the grulshy
+bairns of the cottars. Her bit lassies, Kate and Effie, were better
+off; for some years before, Nanse Banks had taken up a teaching in a
+garret-room of a house, at the corner where John Bayne has biggit
+the sclate-house for his grocery-shop. Nanse learnt them reading
+and working stockings, and how to sew the semplar, for twal-pennies
+a-week. She was a patient creature, well cut out for her calling,
+with blear een, a pale face, and a long neck, but meek and contented
+withal, tholing the dule of this world with a Christian submission
+of the spirit; and her garret-room was a cordial of cleanliness, for
+she made the scholars set the house in order, time and time about,
+every morning; and it was a common remark for many a day, that the
+lassies, who had been at Nanse Banks's school, were always well
+spoken of, both for their civility, and the trigness of their houses
+when they were afterwards married. In short, I do not know, that in
+all the long epoch of my ministry, any individual body did more to
+improve the ways of the parishioners, in their domestic concerns,
+than did that worthy and innocent creature, Nanse Banks, the
+schoolmistress; and she was a great loss when she was removed, as it
+is to be hoped, to a better world; but anent this I shall have to
+speak more at large hereafter.
+
+It was in this year that my patron, the Laird of Breadland, departed
+this life, and I preached his funeral sermon; but he was non-beloved
+in the parish; for my people never forgave him for putting me upon
+them, although they began to be more on a familiar footing with
+myself. This was partly owing to my first wife, Betty Lanshaw, who
+was an active throughgoing woman, and wonderfu' useful to many of
+the cottars' wives at their lying-in; and when a death happened
+among them, her helping hand, and any thing we had at the manse, was
+never wanting; and I went about myself to the bedsides of the frail,
+leaving no stone unturned to win the affections of my people, which,
+by the blessing of the Lord, in process of time, was brought to a
+bearing.
+
+But a thing happened in this year, which deserves to be recorded, as
+manifesting what effect the smuggling was beginning to take in the
+morals of the country side. One Mr Macskipnish, of Highland
+parentage, who had been a valet-de-chambre with a major in the
+campaigns, and taken a prisoner with him by the French, he having
+come home in a cartel, took up a dancing-school at Irville, the
+which art he had learnt in the genteelest fashion, in the mode of
+Paris, at the French court. Such a thing as a dancing-school had
+never, in the memory of man, been known in our country side; and
+there was such a sound about the steps and cottillions of Mr
+Macskipnish, that every lad and lass, that could spare time and
+siller, went to him, to the great neglect of their work. The very
+bairns on the loan, instead of their wonted play, gaed linking and
+louping in the steps of Mr Macskipnish, who was, to be sure, a great
+curiosity, with long spindle legs, his breast shot out like a
+duck's, and his head powdered and frizzled up like a tappit-hen. He
+was, indeed, the proudest peacock that could be seen, and he had a
+ring on his finger, and when he came to drink his tea at the
+Breadland, he brought no hat on his head, but a droll cockit thing
+under his arm, which, he said, was after the manner of the courtiers
+at the petty suppers of one Madam Pompadour, who was at that time
+the concubine of the French king.
+
+I do not recollect any other remarkable thing that happened in this
+year. The harvest was very abundant, and the meal so cheap, that it
+caused a great defect in my stipend; so that I was obligated to
+postpone the purchase of a mahogany scrutoire for my study, as I had
+intended. But I had not the heart to complain of this: on the
+contrary, I rejoiced thereat; for what made me want my scrutoire
+till another year, had carried blitheness into the hearth of the
+cottar, and made the widow's heart sing with joy; and I would have
+been an unnatural creature, had I not joined in the universal
+gladness, because plenty did abound.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III YEAR 1762
+
+
+
+The third year of my ministry was long held in remembrance for
+several very memorable things. William Byres of the Loanhead had a
+cow that calved two calves at one calving; Mrs Byres, the same year,
+had twins, male and female; and there was such a crop on his fields,
+testifying that the Lord never sends a mouth into the world without
+providing meat for it. But what was thought a very daunting sign of
+something, happened on the Sacrament Sabbath at the conclusion of
+the action sermon, when I had made a very suitable discourse. The
+day was tempestuous, and the wind blew with such a pith and birr,
+that I thought it would have twirled the trees in the kirkyard out
+by the roots, and, blowing in this manner, it tirled the thack from
+the rigging of the manse stable; and the same blast that did that,
+took down the lead that was on the kirk-roof, which hurled off, as I
+was saying, at the conclusion of the action sermon, with such a
+dreadful sound, as the like was never heard, and all the
+congregation thought that it betokened a mutation to me. However,
+nothing particular happened to me; but the smallpox came in among
+the weans of the parish, and the smashing that it made of the poor
+bits o' bairns was indeed woeful.
+
+One Sabbath, when the pestilence was raging, I preached a sermon
+about Rachel weeping for her children, which Thomas Thorl, who was
+surely a great judge of good preaching, said, "was a monument of
+divinity whilk searched the heart of many a parent that day;" a
+thing I was well pleased to hear, for Thomas, as I have related at
+length, was the most zealous champion against my getting the parish;
+but, from this time, I set him down in my mind for the next vacancy
+among the elders. Worthy man! it was not permitted him to arrive at
+that honour. In the fall of that year he took an income in his
+legs, and couldna go about, and was laid up for the remainder of his
+days, a perfect Lazarus, by the fire-side. But he was well
+supported in his affliction. In due season, when it pleased Him
+that alone can give and take, to pluck him from this life, as the
+fruit ripened and ready for the gathering, his death, to all that
+knew him, was a gentle dispensation, for truly he had been in sore
+trouble.
+
+It was in this year that Charlie Malcolm, Mrs Malcolm's eldest son,
+was sent to be a cabin-boy in the Tobacco trader, a three-masted
+ship, that sailed between Port-Glasgow and Virginia in America. She
+was commanded by Captain Dickie, an Irville man; for at that time
+the Clyde was supplied with the best sailors from our coast, the
+coal-trade with Ireland being a better trade for bringing up good
+mariners than the long voyages in the open sea; which was the
+reason, as I often heard said, why the Clyde shipping got so many of
+their men from our country side. The going to sea of Charlie
+Malcolm was, on divers accounts, a very remarkable thing to us all;
+for he was the first that ever went from our parish, in the memory
+of man, to be a sailor, and everybody was concerned at it, and some
+thought it was a great venture of his mother to let him, his father
+having been lost at sea. But what could the forlorn widow do? She
+had five weans, and little to give them; and, as she herself said,
+he was aye in the hand of his Maker, go where he might; and the will
+of God would be done, in spite of all earthly wiles and devices to
+the contrary.
+
+On the Monday morning, when Charlie was to go away to meet the
+Irville carrier on the road, we were all up, and I walked by myself
+from the manse into the clachan to bid him farewell, and I met him
+just coming from his mother's door, as blithe as a bee, in his
+sailor's dress, with a stick, and a bundle tied in a Barcelona silk
+handkerchief hanging o'er his shoulder, and his two little brothers
+were with him, and his sisters, Kate and Effie, looking out from the
+door all begreeten; but his mother was in the house, praying to the
+Lord to protect her orphan, as she afterwards told me. All the
+weans of the clachan were gathered at the kirkyard yett to see him
+pass, and they gave him three great shouts as he was going by; and
+everybody was at their doors, and said something encouraging to him;
+but there was a great laugh when auld Mizy Spaewell came hirpling
+with her bauchle in her hand, and flung it after him for good-luck.
+Mizy had a wonderful faith in freats, and was just an oracle of
+sagacity at expounding dreams, and bodes of every sort and
+description--besides, she was reckoned one of the best howdies in
+her day; but by this time she was grown frail and feckless, and she
+died the same year on Hallowe'en, which made everybody wonder that
+it should have so fallen out for her to die on Hallowe'en.
+
+Shortly after the departure of Charlie Malcolm, the Lady of
+Breadland, with her three daughters, removed to Edinburgh, where the
+young laird, that had been my pupil, was learning to be an advocate,
+and the Breadland-house was set to Major Gilchrist, a nabob from
+India; but he was a narrow ailing man, and his maiden-sister, Miss
+Girzie, was the scrimpetest creature that could be; so that, in
+their hands, all the pretty policy of the Breadlands, that had cost
+a power of money to the old laird that was my patron, fell into
+decay and disorder; and the bonny yew-trees that were cut into the
+shape of peacocks, soon grew out of all shape, and are now doleful
+monuments of the major's tack, and that of Lady Skimmilk, as Miss
+Girzie Gilchrist, his sister, was nick-named by every ane that kent
+her.
+
+But it was not so much on account of the neglect of the Breadland,
+that the incoming of Major Gilchrist was to be deplored. The old
+men that had a light labour in keeping the policy in order, were
+thrown out of bread, and could do little; and the poor women that
+whiles got a bit and a drap from the kitchen of the family, soon
+felt the change, so that by little and little we were obligated to
+give help from the session; insomuch that, before the end of the
+year, I was necessitated to preach a discourse on almsgiving,
+specially for the benefit of our own poor, a thing never before
+known in the parish.
+
+But one good thing came from the Gilchrists to Mrs Malcolm. Miss
+Girzie, whom they called Lady Skimmilk, had been in a very penurious
+way as a seamstress, in the Gorbals of Glasgow, while her brother
+was making the fortune in India, and she was a clever needle-woman--
+none better, as it was said; and she, having some things to make,
+took Kate Malcolm to help her in the coarse work; and Kate, being a
+nimble and birky thing, was so useful to the lady, and the
+complaining man the major, that they invited her to stay with them
+at the Breadland for the winter, where, although she was holden to
+her seam from morning to night, her food lightened the hand of her
+mother, who, for the first time since her coming into the parish,
+found the penny for the day's darg more than was needed for the
+meal-basin; and the tea-drinking was beginning to spread more
+openly, insomuch that, by the advice of the first Mrs Balwhidder,
+Mrs Malcolm took in tea to sell, and in this way was enabled to eke
+something to the small profits of her wheel. Thus the tide that had
+been so long ebbing to her, began to turn; and here I am bound in
+truth to say, that although I never could abide the smuggling, both
+on its own account, and the evils that grew therefrom to the country
+side, I lost some of my dislike to the tea after Mrs Malcolm began
+to traffic in it, and we then had it for our breakfast in the
+morning at the manse, as well as in the afternoon. But what I
+thought most of it for was, that it did no harm to the head of the
+drinkers, which was not always the case with the possets that were
+in fashion before. There is no meeting now in the summer evenings,
+as I remember often happened in my younger days, with decent ladies
+coming home with red faces, tosy and cosh, from a posset-masking;
+so, both for its temperance and on account of Mrs Malcolm's sale, I
+refrained from the November in this year to preach against tea; but
+I never lifted the weight of my displeasure from off the smuggling
+trade, until it was utterly put down by the strong hand of
+government.
+
+There was no other thing of note in this year, saving only that I
+planted in the garden the big pear-tree, which had the two great
+branches that we call the Adam and Eve. I got the plant, then a
+sapling, from Mr Graft, that was Lord Eaglesham's head-gardener; and
+he said it was, as indeed all the parish now knows well, a most
+juicy sweet pear, such as was not known in Scotland till my lord
+brought down the father plant from the king's garden in London, in
+the forty-five when he went up to testify his loyalty to the House
+of Hanover.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV YEAR 1763
+
+
+
+The An. Dom. 1763, was, in many a respect, a memorable year, both in
+public and in private. The King granted peace to the French, and
+Charlie Malcolm, that went to sea in the Tobacco trader, came home
+to see his mother. The ship, after being at America, had gone down
+to Jamaica, an island in the West Indies, with a cargo of live
+lumber, as Charlie told me himself, and had come home with more than
+a hundred and fifty hoggits of sugar, and sixty-three puncheons full
+of rum; for she was, by all accounts, a stately galley, and almost
+two hundred tons in the burthen, being the largest vessel then
+sailing from the creditable town of Port-Glasgow. Charlie was not
+expected; and his coming was a great thing to us all, so I will
+mention the whole particulars.
+
+One evening, towards the gloaming, as I was taking my walk of
+meditation, I saw a brisk sailor laddie coming towards me. He had a
+pretty green parrot sitting on a bundle, tied in a Barcelona silk
+handkerchief, which he carried with a stick over his shoulder, and
+in this bundle was a wonderful big nut, such as no one in our parish
+had ever seen. It was called a cocker-nut. This blithe callant was
+Charlie Malcolm, who had come all the way that day his leeful lane,
+on his own legs from Greenock, where the Tobacco trader was then
+'livering her cargo. I told him how his mother, and his brothers,
+and his sisters were all in good health, and went to convoy him
+home; and as we were going along, he told me many curious things,
+and he gave me six beautiful yellow limes, that he had brought in
+his pouch all the way across the seas, for me to make a bowl of
+punch with, and I thought more of them than if they had been golden
+guineas, it was so mindful of the laddie.
+
+When we got to the door of his mother's house, she was sitting at
+the fireside, with her three other bairns at their bread and milk,
+Kate being then with Lady Skimmilk, at the Breadland, sewing. It
+was between the day and dark, when the shuttle stands still till the
+lamp is lighted. But such a shout of joy and thankfulness as rose
+from that hearth, when Charlie went in! The very parrot, ye would
+have thought, was a participator, for the beast gied a skraik that
+made my whole head dirl; and the neighbours came flying and flocking
+to see what was the matter, for it was the first parrot ever seen
+within the bounds of the parish, and some thought it was but a
+foreign hawk, with a yellow head and green feathers.
+
+In the midst of all this, Effie Malcolm had run off to the Breadland
+for her sister Kate, and the two lassies came flying breathless,
+with Miss Girzie Gilchrist, the Lady Skimmilk, pursuing them like
+desperation, or a griffin, down the avenue; for Kate, in her hurry,
+had flung down her seam, a new printed gown, that she was helping to
+make, and it had fallen into a boyne of milk that was ready for the
+creaming, by which issued a double misfortune to Miss Girzie, the
+gown being not only ruined, but licking up the cream. For this,
+poor Kate was not allowed ever to set her face in the Breadland
+again.
+
+When Charlie Malcolm had stayed about a week with his mother, he
+returned to his berth in the Tobacco trader, and shortly after his
+brother Robert was likewise sent to serve his time to the sea, with
+an owner that was master of his own bark, in the coal trade at
+Irville. Kate, who was really a surprising lassie for her years,
+was taken off her mother's hands by the old Lady Macadam, that lived
+in her jointure house, which is now the Cross Keys Inn. Her
+ladyship was a woman of high breeding, her husband having been a
+great general, and knighted by the king for his exploits; but she
+was lame, and could not move about in her dining-room without help;
+so hearing from the first Mrs Balwhidder how Kate had done such an
+unatonable deed to Miss Girzie Gilchrist, she sent for Kate, and,
+finding her sharp and apt, she took her to live with her as a
+companion. This was a vast advantage, for the lady was versed in
+all manner of accomplishments, and could read and speak French with
+more ease than any professor at that time in the College of Glasgow;
+and she had learnt to sew flowers on satin, either in a nunnery
+abroad, or in a boarding-school in England, and took pleasure in
+teaching Kate all she knew, and how to behave herself like a lady.
+
+In the summer of this year, old Mr Patrick Dilworth, that had so
+long been doited with the paralytics, died, and it was a great
+relief to my people, for the heritors could no longer refuse to get
+a proper schoolmaster; so we took on trial Mr Lorimore, who has ever
+since the year after, with so much credit to himself, and usefulness
+to the parish, been schoolmaster, session clerk, and precentor--a
+man of great mildness and extraordinary particularity. He was then
+a very young man, and some objection was made, on account of his
+youth, to his being session-clerk, especially as the smuggling
+immorality still gave us much trouble in the making up of irregular
+marriages; but his discretion was greater than could have been hoped
+for from his years; and, after a twelvemonth's probation in the
+capacity of schoolmaster, he was installed in all the offices that
+had belonged to his predecessor, old Mr Patrick Dilworth that was.
+
+But the most memorable thing that befell among my people this year,
+was the burning of the lint-mill on the Lugton water, which
+happened, of all the days of the year, on the very selfsame day that
+Miss Girzie Gilchrist, better known as Lady Skimmilk, hired the
+chaise from Mrs Watts of the New Inns of Irville, to go with her
+brother, the major, to consult the faculty in Edinburgh concerning
+his complaints. For, as the chaise was coming by the mill, William
+Huckle, the miller that was, came flying out of the mill like a
+demented man, crying fire!--and it was the driver that brought the
+melancholy tidings to the clachan--and melancholy they were; for the
+mill was utterly destroyed, and in it not a little of all that
+year's crop of lint in our parish. The first Mrs Balwhidder lost
+upwards of twelve stone, which we had raised on the glebe with no
+small pains, watering it in the drouth, as it was intended for
+sarking to ourselves, and sheets and napery. A great loss indeed it
+was, and the vexation thereof had a visible effect on Mrs
+Balwhidder's health, which from the spring had been in a dwining
+way. But for it, I think she might have wrestled through the
+winter: however, it was ordered otherwise, and she was removed from
+mine to Abraham's bosom on Christmas-day, and buried on Hogmanay,
+for it was thought uncanny to have a dead corpse in the house on the
+new-year's day. She was a worthy woman, studying with all her
+capacity to win the hearts of my people towards me--in the which
+good work she prospered greatly; so that, when she died, there was
+not a single soul in the parish that was not contented with both my
+walk and conversation. Nothing could be more peaceable than the way
+we lived together. Her brother Andrew, a fine lad, I had sent to
+the college at Glasgow, at my own cost; and when he came out to the
+burial, he stayed with me a month, for the manse after her decease
+was very dull, and it was during this visit that he gave me an
+inkling of his wish to go out to India as a cadet, but the
+transactions anent that fall within the scope of another year--as
+well as what relates to her headstone, and the epitaph in metre,
+which I indicated myself thereon; John Truel the mason carving the
+same, as may be seen in the kirkyard, where it wants a little
+reparation and setting upright, having settled the wrong way when
+the second Mrs Balwhidder was laid by her side.--But I must not here
+enter upon an anticipation.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V YEAR 1764
+
+
+
+This year well deserved the name of the monumental year in our
+parish; for the young laird of the Breadland, that had been my
+pupil, being learning to be an advocate among the faculty in
+Edinburgh, with his lady mother, who had removed thither with the
+young ladies her daughters, for the benefit of education, sent out
+to be put up in the kirk, under the loft over the family vault, an
+elegant marble headstone, with an epitaph engraven thereon, in fair
+Latin, setting forth many excellent qualities which the old laird,
+my patron that was, the inditer thereof said he possessed. I say
+the inditer, because it couldna have been the young laird himself,
+although he got the credit o't on the stone, for he was nae daub in
+my aught at the Latin or any other language. However, he might
+improve himself at Edinburgh, where a' manner of genteel things were
+then to be got at an easy rate, and doubtless the young laird got a
+probationer at the College to write the epitaph; but I have often
+wondered sin' syne, how he came to make it in Latin, for assuredly
+his dead parent, if he could have seen it, could not have read a
+single word o't, notwithstanding it was so vaunty about his virtues,
+and other civil and hospitable qualifications.
+
+The coming of the laird's monumental stone had a great effect on me,
+then in a state of deep despondency for the loss of the first Mrs
+Balwhidder; and I thought I could not do a better thing, just by way
+of diversion in my heavy sorrow, than to get a well-shapen headstone
+made for her--which, as I have hinted at in the record of the last
+year, was done and set up. But a headstone without an epitaph, is
+no better than a body without the breath of life in't; and so it
+behoved me to make a poesy for the monument, the which I conned and
+pondered upon for many days. I thought as Mrs Balwhidder, worthy
+woman as she was, did not understand the Latin tongue, it would not
+do to put on what I had to say in that language, as the laird had
+done--nor indeed would it have been easy, as I found upon the
+experimenting, to tell what I had to tell in Latin, which is
+naturally a crabbed language, and very difficult to write properly.
+I therefore, after mentioning her age and the dates of her birth and
+departure, composed in sedate poetry the following epitaph, which
+may yet be seen on the tombstone.
+
+
+EPITAPH
+
+A lovely Christian, spouse, and friend,
+Pleasant in life, and at her end. -
+A pale consumption dealt the blow
+That laid her here, with dust below.
+Sore was the cough that shook her frame;
+That cough her patience did proclaim -
+And as she drew her latest breath,
+She said, "The Lord is sweet in death."
+O pious reader! standing by,
+Learn like this gentle one to die.
+The grass doth grow and fade away,
+And time runs out by night and day;
+The King of Terrors has command
+To strike us with his dart in hand.
+Go where we will by flood or field,
+He will pursue and make us yield.
+But though to him we must resign
+The vesture of our part divine,
+There is a jewel in our trust,
+That will not perish in the dust,
+A pearl of price, a precious gem,
+Ordained for Jesus' diadem;
+Therefore, be holy while you can,
+And think upon the doom of man.
+Repent in time and sin no more,
+That when the strife of life is o'er,
+On wings of love your soul may rise,
+To dwell with angels in the skies,
+Where psalms are sung eternally,
+And martyrs ne'er again shall die;
+But with the saints still bask in bliss,
+And drink the cup of blessedness.
+
+
+This was greatly thought of at the time, and Mr Lorimore, who had a
+nerve for poesy himself in his younger years, was of opinion that it
+was so much to the purpose, and suitable withal, that he made his
+scholars write it out for their examination copies, at the reading
+whereof before the heritors, when the examination of the school came
+round, the tear came into my eye, and every one present sympathized
+with me in my great affliction for the loss of the first Mrs
+Balwhidder.
+
+Andrew Langshaw, as I have recorded, having come from the Glasgow
+College to the burial of his sister, my wife that was, stayed with
+me a month to keep me company; and staying with me, he was a great
+cordial, for the weather was wet and sleety, and the nights were
+stormy, so that I could go little out, and few of the elders came
+in, they being at that time old men in a feckless condition, not at
+all qualified to warsle with the blasts of winter. But when Andrew
+left me to go back to his classes, I was eerie and lonesome; and but
+for the getting of the monument ready, which was a blessed
+entertainment to me in those dreary nights, with consulting anent
+the shape of it with John Truel, and meditating on the verse for the
+epitaph, I might have gone altogether demented. However, it pleased
+Him, who is the surety of the sinner, to help me through the Slough
+of Despond, and to set my feet on firm land, establishing my way
+thereon.
+
+But the work of the monument, and the epitaph, could not endure for
+a constancy, and after it was done, I was again in great danger of
+sinking into the hypochonderies a second time. However, I was
+enabled to fight with my affliction, and by-and-by, as the spring
+began to open her green lattice, and to set out her flower-pots to
+the sunshine, and the time of the singing of birds was come, I
+became more composed, and like myself, so I often walked in the
+fields, and held communion with nature, and wondered at the
+mysteries thereof.
+
+On one of these occasions, as I was sauntering along the edge of
+Eaglesham-wood, looking at the industrious bee going from flower to
+flower, and the idle butterfly, that layeth up no store, but
+perisheth ere it is winter, I felt as it were a spirit from on high
+descending upon me, a throb at my heart, and a thrill in my brain,
+and I was transported out of myself, and seized with the notion of
+writing a book--but what it should be about, I could not settle to
+my satisfaction. Sometimes I thought of an orthodox poem, like
+PARADISE LOST, by John Milton, wherein I proposed to treat more at
+large of Original Sin, and the great mystery of Redemption; at
+others, I fancied that a connect treatise on the efficacy of Free
+Grace would be more taking; but although I made divers beginnings in
+both subjects, some new thought ever came into my head, and the
+whole summer passed away and nothing was done. I therefore
+postponed my design of writing a book till the winter, when I would
+have the benefit of the long nights. Before that, however, I had
+other things of more importance to think about. My servant lasses,
+having no eye of a mistress over them, wastered every thing at such
+a rate, and made such a galravitching in the house, that, long
+before the end of the year, the year's stipend was all spent, and I
+did not know what to do. At lang and length I mustered courage to
+send for Mr Auld, who was then living, and an elder. He was a douce
+and discreet man, fair and well-doing in the world, and had a better
+handful of strong common sense than many even of the heritors. So I
+told him how I was situated, and conferred with him; and he advised
+me, for my own sake, to look out for another wife as soon as decency
+would allow, which he thought might very properly be after the turn
+of the year, by which time the first Mrs Balwhidder would be dead
+more than twelve months; and when I mentioned my design to write a
+book, he said, (and he was a man of good discretion), that the doing
+of the book was a thing that would keep, but masterful servants were
+a growing evil; so, upon his counselling, I resolved not to meddle
+with the book till I was married again, but employ the interim,
+between then and the turn of the year, in looking out for a prudent
+woman to be my second wife, strictly intending, as I did perform,
+not to mint a word about my choice, if I made one, till the whole
+twelve months and a day, from the date of the first Mrs Balwhidder's
+interment, had run out.
+
+In this the hand of Providence was very visible, and lucky for me it
+was that I had sent for Mr Auld when I did send, as the very week
+following, a sound began to spread in the parish, that one of my
+lassies had got herself with bairn, which was an awful thing to
+think had happened in the house of her master, and that master a
+minister of the gospel. Some there were, for backbiting
+appertaineth to all conditions, that jealoused and wondered if I had
+not a finger in the pie; which, when Mr Auld heard, he bestirred
+himself in such a manful and godly way in my defence, as silenced
+the clash, telling that I was utterly incapable of any such thing,
+being a man of a guileless heart, and a spiritual simplicity, that
+would be ornamental in a child. We then had the latheron summoned
+before the session, and was not long of making her confess that the
+father was Nichol Snipe, Lord Glencairn's gamekeeper; and both her
+and Nichol were obligated to stand in the kirk: but Nichol was a
+graceless reprobate, for he came with two coats, one buttoned behind
+him, and another buttoned before him, and two wigs of my lord's,
+lent him by the valet-de-chamer; the one over his face, and the
+other in the right way; and he stood with his face to the church-
+wall. When I saw him from the poopit, I said to him--"Nichol, you
+must turn your face towards me!" At the which, he turned round to
+be sure, but there he presented the same show as his back. I was
+confounded, and did not know what to say, but cried out with a voice
+of anger--"Nichol, Nichol! if ye had been a' back, ye wouldna hae
+been there this day;" which had such an effect on the whole
+congregation, that the poor fellow suffered afterwards more
+derision, than if I had rebuked him in the manner prescribed by the
+session.
+
+This affair, with the previous advice of Mr Auld, was, however, a
+warning to me, that no pastor of his parish should be long without a
+helpmate. Accordingly, as soon as the year was out, I set myself
+earnestly about the search for one; but as the particulars fall
+properly within the scope and chronicle of the next year, I must
+reserve them for it; and I do not recollect that any thing more
+particular befell in this, excepting that William Mutchkins, the
+father of Mr Mutchkins, the great spirit-dealer in Glasgow, set up a
+change-house in the clachan, which was the first in the parish, and
+which, if I could have helped, would have been the last; for it was
+opening a howf to all manner of wickedness, and was an immediate get
+and offspring of the smuggling trade, against which I had so set my
+countenance. But William Mutchkins himself was a respectable man,
+and no house could be better ordered than his change. At a stated
+hour he made family worship, for he brought up his children in the
+fear of God and the Christian religion; and although the house was
+full, he would go in to the customers, and ask them if they would
+want anything for half an hour, for that he was going to make
+exercise with his family; and many a wayfaring traveller has joined
+in the prayer. There is no such thing, I fear, nowadays, of
+publicans entertaining travellers in this manner.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI YEAR 1765
+
+
+
+As there was little in the last year that concerned the parish, but
+only myself, so in this the like fortune continued; and saving a
+rise in the price of barley, occasioned, as was thought, by the
+establishment of a house for brewing whisky in a neighbouring
+parish, it could not be said that my people were exposed to the
+mutations and influences of the stars, which ruled in the seasons of
+Ann. Dom. 1765. In the winter there was a dearth of fuel, such as
+has not been since; for when the spring loosened the bonds of the
+ice, three new coal-heughs were shanked in the Douray moor, and ever
+since there has been a great plenty of that necessary article.
+Truly, it is very wonderful to see how things come round. When the
+talk was about the shanking of their heughs, and a paper to get folk
+to take shares in them, was carried through the circumjacent
+parishes, it was thought a gowk's errand; but no sooner was the coal
+reached, but up sprung such a traffic, that it was a godsend to the
+parish, and the opening of a trade and commerce, that has, to use an
+old byword, brought gold in gowpins amang us. From that time my
+stipend has been on the regular increase, and therefore I think that
+the incoming of the heritors must have been in like manner
+augmented.
+
+Soon after this, the time was drawing near for my second marriage.
+I had placed my affections, with due consideration, on Miss Lizy
+Kibbock, the well brought-up daughter of Mr Joseph Kibbock of the
+Gorbyholm, who was the first that made a speculation in the farming
+way in Ayrshire, and whose cheese were of such an excellent quality,
+that they have, under the name of Delap-cheese, spread far and wide
+over the civilized world. Miss Lizy and me were married on the 29th
+day of April, with some inconvenience to both sides, on account of
+the dread that we had of being married in May; for it is said -
+
+
+"Of the marriages in May,
+The bairns die of a decay."
+
+
+However, married we were, and we hired the Irville chaise, and with
+Miss Jenny her sister, and Becky Cairns her niece, who sat on a
+portmanty at our feet, we went on a pleasure jaunt to Glasgow, where
+we bought a miracle of useful things for the manse, that neither the
+first Mrs Balwhidder nor me ever thought of; but the second Mrs
+Balwhidder that was, had a geni for management, and it was
+extraordinary what she could go through. Well may I speak of her
+with commendations; for she was the bee that made my honey, although
+at first things did not go so clear with us. For she found the
+manse rookit and herrit, and there was such a supply of plenishing
+of all sort wanted, that I thought myself ruined and undone by her
+care and industry. There was such a buying of wool to make
+blankets, with a booming of the meikle wheel to spin the same, and
+such birring of the little wheel for sheets and napery, that the
+manse was for many a day like an organ kist. Then we had milk cows,
+and the calves to bring up, and a kirning of butter, and a making of
+cheese; in short, I was almost by myself with the jangle and din,
+which prevented me from writing a book as I had proposed, and I for
+a time thought of the peaceful and kindly nature of the first Mrs
+Balwhidder with a sigh; but the outcoming was soon manifest. The
+second Mrs Balwhidder sent her butter on the market-days to Irville,
+and her cheese from time to time to Glasgow, to Mrs Firlot, that
+kept the huxtry in the Saltmarket; and they were both so well made,
+that our dairy was just a coining of money, insomuch that, after the
+first year, we had the whole tot of my stipend to put untouched into
+the bank.
+
+But I must say, that although we were thus making siller like sclate
+stones, I was not satisfied in my own mind that I had got the manse
+merely to be a factory of butter and cheese, and to breed up veal
+calves for the slaughter; so I spoke to the second Mrs Balwhidder,
+and pointed out to her what I thought the error of our way; but she
+had been so ingrained with the profitable management of cows and
+grumphies in her father's house, that she could not desist, at the
+which I was greatly grieved. By-and-by, however, I began to discern
+that there was something as good in her example, as the giving of
+alms to the poor folk; for all the wives of the parish were stirred
+up by it into a wonderful thrift, and nothing was heard of in every
+house, but of quiltings and wabs to weave; insomuch that, before
+many years came round, there was not a better stocked parish, with
+blankets and napery, than mine was, within the bounds of Scotland.
+
+It was about the Michaelmas of this year that Mrs Malcolm opened her
+shop, which she did chiefly on the advice of Mrs Balwhidder, who
+said it was far better to allow a little profit on the different
+haberdasheries that might be wanted, than to send to the
+neighbouring towns an end's errand on purpose for them, none of the
+lasses that were so sent ever thinking of making less than a day's
+play on every such occasion. In a word, it is not to be told how
+the second Mrs Balwhidder, my wife, showed the value of flying time,
+even to the concerns of this world, and was the mean of giving a
+life and energy to the housewifery of the parish, that has made many
+a one beek his shins in comfort, that would otherwise have had but a
+cold coal to blow at. Indeed, Mr, Kibbock, her father, was a man
+beyond the common, and had an insight of things, by which he was
+enabled to draw profit and advantage, where others could only see
+risk and detriment. He planted mounts of fir-trees on the bleak and
+barren tops of the hills of his farm, the which everybody, and I
+among the rest, considered as a thrashing of the water and raising
+of bells. But as his rack ran his trees grew, and the plantations
+supplied him with stabs to make STAKE AND RICE between his fields,
+which soon gave them a trig and orderly appearance, such as had
+never before been seen in the west country; and his example has, in
+this matter, been so followed, that I have heard travellers say, who
+have been in foreign countries, that the shire of Ayr, for its bonny
+round green plantings on the tops of the hills, is above comparison
+either with Italy or Switzerland, where the hills are, as it were,
+in a state of nature.
+
+Upon the whole, this was a busy year in the parish, and the seeds of
+many great improvements were laid. The king's road, the which then
+ran through the Vennel, was mended; but it was not till some years
+after, as I shall record by-and-by, that the trust-road, as it was
+called, was made, the which had the effect of turning the town
+inside out.
+
+Before I conclude, it is proper to mention that the kirk-bell, which
+had to this time, from time immemorial, hung on an ash-tree, was one
+stormy night cast down by the breaking of the branch, which was the
+cause of the heritors agreeing to build the steeple. The clock was
+a mortification to the parish from the Lady Breadland, when she died
+some years after.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII YEAR 1766
+
+
+
+It was in this Ann. Dom. that the great calamity happened, the which
+took place on a Sabbath evening in the month of February. Mrs
+Balwhidder had just infused or masket the tea, and we were set round
+the fireside, to spend the night in an orderly and religious manner,
+along with Mr and Mrs Petticrew, who were on a friendly visitation
+to the manse, the mistress being full cousin to Mrs Balwhidder.--
+Sitting, as I was saying, at our tea, one of the servant lasses came
+into the room with a sort of a panic laugh, and said, "What are ye
+all doing there when the Breadland's in a low?"--"The Breadland in a
+low!" cried I.--"Oh, ay!" cried she; "bleezing at the windows and
+the rigging, and out at the lum, like a killogie." Upon the which,
+we all went to the door, and there, to be sure, we did see that the
+Breadland was burning, the flames crackling high out o'er the trees,
+and the sparks flying like a comet's tail in the firmament.
+
+Seeing this sight, I said to Mr Petticrew, that, in the strength of
+the Lord, I would go and see what could be done, for it was as plain
+as the sun in the heavens that the ancient place of the Breadlands
+would be destroyed; whereupon he accorded to go with me, and we
+walked at a lively course to the spot, and the people from all
+quarters were pouring in, and it was an awsome scene. But the
+burning of the house, and the droves of the multitude, were nothing
+to what we saw when we got forenent the place. There was the
+rafters crackling, the flames raging, the servants running, some
+with bedding, some with looking-glasses, and others with chamber
+utensils as little likely to be fuel to the fire, but all
+testifications to the confusion and alarm. Then there was a shout,
+"Whar's Miss Girzie? whar's the Major?" The Major, poor man, soon
+cast up, lying upon a feather-bed, ill with his complaints, in the
+garden; but Lady Skimmilk was nowhere to be found. At last, a
+figure was seen in the upper flat, pursued by the flames, and that
+was Miss Girzie. Oh! it was a terrible sight to look at her in that
+jeopardy at the window, with her gold watch in the one hand and the
+silver teapot in the other, skreighing like desperation for a ladder
+and help. But, before a ladder or help could be found, the floor
+sunk down, and the roof fell in, and poor Miss Girzie, with her
+idols, perished in the burning. It was a dreadful business! I
+think, to this hour, how I saw her at the window, how the fire came
+in behind her, and claught her like a fiery Belzebub, and bore her
+into perdition before our eyes. The next morning the atomy of the
+body was found among the rubbish, with a piece of metal in what had
+been each of its hands, no doubt the gold watch and the silver
+teapot. Such was the end of Miss Girzie; and the Breadland, which
+the young laird, my pupil that was, by growing a resident at
+Edinburgh, never rebuilt. It was burnt to the very ground; nothing
+was spared but what the servants in the first flaught gathered up in
+a hurry and ran with; but no one could tell how the Major, who was
+then, as it was thought by the faculty, past the power of nature to
+recover, got out of the house, and was laid on the feather-bed in
+the garden. However, he never got the better of that night, and
+before Whitsunday he was dead too, and buried beside his sister's
+bones at the south side of the kirkyard dyke, where his cousin's
+son, that was his heir, erected the handsome monument, with the
+three urns and weeping cherubims, bearing witness to the great
+valour of the Major among the Hindoos, as well as other commendable
+virtues, for which, as the epitaph says, he was universally esteemed
+and beloved, by all who knew him, in his public and private
+capacity.
+
+But although the burning of the Breadland-House was justly called
+the great calamity, on account of what happened to Miss Girzie with
+her gold watch and silver teapot; yet, as Providence never fails to
+bring good out of evil, it turned out a catastrophe that proved
+advantageous to the parish; for the laird, instead of thinking to
+build it up, was advised to let the policy out as a farm, and the
+tack was taken by Mr Coulter, than whom there had been no such man
+in the agriculturing line among us before, not even excepting Mr
+Kibbock of the Gorbyholm, my father-in-law that was. Of the
+stabling, Mr Coulter made a comfortable dwelling-house; and having
+rugget out the evergreens and other unprofitable plants, saving the
+twa ancient yew-trees which the near-begaun Major and his sister had
+left to go to ruin about the mansion-house, he turned all to
+production, and it was wonderful what an increase he made the land
+bring forth. He was from far beyond Edinburgh, and had got his
+insight among the Lothian farmers, so that he knew what crop should
+follow another, and nothing could surpass the regularity of his rigs
+and furrows.--Well do I remember the admiration that I had, when, in
+a fine sunny morning of the first spring after he took the
+Breadland, I saw his braird on what had been the cows' grass, as
+even and pretty as if it had been worked and stripped in the loom
+with a shuttle. Truly, when I look back at the example he set, and
+when I think on the method and dexterity of his management, I must
+say, that his coming to the parish was a great godsend, and tended
+to do far more for the benefit of my people, than if the young laird
+had rebuilded the Breadland-House in a fashionable style, as was at
+one time spoken of.
+
+But the year of the great calamity was memorable for another thing:-
+in the December foregoing, the wind blew, as I have recorded in the
+chronicle of the last year, and broke down the bough of the tree
+whereon the kirk-bell had hung from the time, as was supposed, of
+the persecution, before the bringing over of King William. Mr
+Kibbock, my father-in-law then that was, being a man of a discerning
+spirit, when he heard of the unfortunate fall of the bell, advised
+me to get the heritors to big a steeple; but which, when I thought
+of the expense, I was afraid to do. He, however, having a great
+skill in the heart of man, gave me no rest on the subject; but told
+me, that if I allowed the time to go by till the heritors were used
+to come to the kirk without a bell, I would get no steeple at all.
+I often wondered what made Mr Kibbock so fond of a steeple, which is
+a thing that I never could see a good reason for, saving that it is
+an ecclesiastical adjunct, like the gown and bands. However, he set
+me on to get a steeple proposed, and after no little argol-bargling
+with the heritors, it was agreed to. This was chiefly owing to the
+instrumentality of Lady Moneyplack, who, in that winter, was much
+subjected to the rheumatics, she having, one cold and raw Sunday
+morning, there being no bell to announce the time, come half an hour
+too soon to the kirk, made her bestir herself to get an interest
+awakened among the heritors in behalf of a steeple.
+
+But when the steeple was built, a new contention arose. It was
+thought that the bell, which had been used in the ash-tree, would
+not do in a stone and lime fabric; so, after great agitation among
+the heritors, it was resolved to sell the old bell to a foundery in
+Glasgow, and buy a new bell suitable to the steeple, which was a
+very comely fabric. The buying of the new bell led to other
+considerations, and the old Lady Breadland, being at the time in a
+decaying condition, and making her will, she left a mortification to
+the parish, as I have intimated, to get a clock; so that, by the
+time the steeple was finished, and the bell put up, the Lady
+Breadland's legacy came to be implemented, according to the
+ordination of the testatrix.
+
+Of the casualities that happened in this year, I should not forget
+to put down, as a thing for remembrance, that an aged woman, one
+Nanse Birrel, a distillator of herbs, and well skilled in the
+healing of sores, who had a great repute among the quarriers and
+colliers--she having gone to the physic well in the sandy hills to
+draw water, was found, with her feet uppermost in the well, by some
+of the bairns of Mr Lorimore's school; and there was a great debate
+whether Nanse had fallen in by accident head foremost, or, in a
+temptation, thrown herself in that position, with her feet sticking
+up to the evil one; for Nanse was a curious discontented blear-eyed
+woman, and it was only with great ado that I could get the people
+keepit from calling her a witchwife.
+
+I should likewise place on record, that the first ass that had ever
+been seen in this part of the country, came in the course of this
+year with a gang of tinklers, that made horn-spoons and mended
+bellows. Where they came from never was well made out; but being a
+blackaviced crew, they were generally thought to be Egyptians. They
+tarried about a week among us, living in tents, with their little
+ones squattling among the litter; and one of the older men of them
+set and tempered to me two razors, that were as good as nothing, but
+which he made better than when they were new.
+
+Shortly after, but I am not quite sure whether it was in the end of
+this year, or the beginning of the next, although I have a notion
+that it was in this, there came over from Ireland a troop of wild
+Irish, seeking for work as they said; but they made free quarters,
+for they herrit the roosts of the clachan, and cutted the throat of
+a sow of ours, the carcass of which they no doubt intended to steal;
+but something came over them, and it was found lying at the back
+side of the manse, to the great vexation of Mrs Balwhidder; for she
+had set her mind on a clecking of pigs, and only waited for the
+China boar, that had been brought down from London by Lord
+Eaglesham, to mend the breed of pork--a profitable commodity, that
+her father, Mr Kibbock, cultivated for the Glasgow market. The
+destruction of our sow, under such circumstances, was therefore held
+to be a great crime and cruelty, and it had the effect to raise up
+such a spirit in the clachan, that the Irish were obligated to
+decamp; and they set out for Glasgow, where one of them was
+afterwards hanged for a fact, but the truth concerning how he did
+it, I either never heard, or it has passed from my mind, like many
+other things I should have carefully treasured.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII YEAR 1767
+
+
+
+All things in our parish were now beginning to shoot up into a great
+prosperity. The spirit of farming began to get the upper hand of
+the spirit of smuggling, and the coal-heughs that had been opened in
+the Douray, now brought a pour of money among us. In the manse, the
+thrift and frugality of the second Mrs Balwhidder throve
+exceedingly, so that we could save the whole stipend for the bank.
+
+The king's highway, as I have related in the foregoing, ran through
+the Vennel, which was a narrow and a crooked street, with many big
+stones here and there, and every now and then, both in the spring
+and the fall, a gathering of middens for the fields; insomuch that
+the coal-carts from the Douray moor were often reested in the middle
+of the causey, and on more than one occasion some of them laired
+altogether in the middens, and others of them broke down. Great
+complaint was made by the carters anent these difficulties, and
+there was, for many a day, a talk and sound of an alteration and
+amendment; but nothing was fulfilled in the matter till the month of
+March in this year, when the Lord Eaglesham was coming from London
+to see the new lands that he had bought in our parish. His lordship
+was a man of a genteel spirit, and very fond of his horses, which
+were the most beautiful creatures of their kind that had been seen
+in all the country side. Coming, as I was noting, to see his new
+lands, he was obliged to pass through the clachan one day, when all
+the middens were gathered out, reeking and sappy, in the middle of
+the causey. Just as his lordship was driving in with his prancing
+steeds, like a Jehu, at one end of the vennel, a long string of
+loaded coal-carts came in at the other, and there was hardly room
+for my lord to pass them. What was to be done? His lordship could
+not turn back, and the coal-carts were in no less perplexity. Every
+body was out of doors to see and to help; when, in trying to get his
+lordship's carriage over the top of a midden, the horses gave a
+sudden loup, and couped the coach, and threw my lord, head foremost,
+into the very scent-bottle of the whole commodity, which made him go
+perfect mad, and he swore like a trooper that he would get an act of
+parliament to put down the nuisance--the which now ripened in the
+course of this year into the undertaking of the trust-road.
+
+His lordship, being in a woeful plight, left the carriage and came
+to the manse, till his servant went to the castle for a change for
+him; but he could not wait nor abide himself: so he got the lend of
+my best suit of clothes, and was wonderful jocose both with Mrs
+Balwhidder and me, for he was a portly man, and I but a thin body,
+and it was really a droll curiosity to see his lordship clad in my
+garments.
+
+Out of this accident grew a sort of a neighbourliness between that
+Lord Eaglesham and me; so that when Andrew Lanshaw, the brother that
+was of the first Mrs Balwhidder, came to think of going to India, I
+wrote to my lord for his behoof, and his lordship got him sent out
+as a cadet, and was extraordinary discreet to Andrew when he went up
+to London to take his passage, speaking to him of me as if I had
+been a very saint, which the Searcher of Hearts knows I am far from
+thinking myself.
+
+But to return to the making of the trust-road, which, as I have
+said, turned the town inside out. It was agreed among the heritors,
+that it should run along the back side of the south houses; and that
+there should be steadings fued off on each side, according to a plan
+that was laid down; and this being gone into, the town gradually, in
+the course of years, grew up into that orderlyness which makes it
+now a pattern to the country side--all which was mainly owing to the
+accident that befell the Lord Eaglesham, which is a clear proof how
+improvements come about, as it were, by the immediate instigation of
+Providence, which should make the heart of man humble, and change
+his eyes of pride and haughtiness into a lowly demeanour.
+
+But although this making of the trust-road was surely a great thing
+for the parish, and of an advantage to my people, we met, in this
+year, with a loss not to be compensated--that was the death of Nanse
+Banks, the schoolmistress. She had been long in a weak and frail
+state; but being a methodical creature, still kept on the school,
+laying the foundation for many a worthy wife and mother. However,
+about the decline of the year her complaints increased, and she sent
+for me to consult about her giving up the school; and I went to see
+her on Saturday afternoon, when the bit lassies, her scholars, had
+put the house in order, and gone home till the Monday.
+
+She was sitting in the window-nook, reading THE WORD to herself,
+when I entered; but she closed the book, and put her spectacles in
+for a mark when she saw me; and, as it was expected I would come,
+her easy-chair, with a clean cover, had been set out for me by the
+scholars, by which I discerned that there was something more than
+common to happen, and so it appeared when I had taken my seat.
+
+"Sir," said she, "I hae sent for you on a thing troubles me sairly.
+I have warsled with poortith in this shed, which it has pleased the
+Lord to allow me to possess; but my strength is worn out, and I fear
+I maun yield in the strife;" and she wiped her eye with her apron.
+I told her, however, to be of good cheer; and then she said, "That
+she could no longer thole the din of the school, and that she was
+weary, and ready to lay herself down to die whenever the Lord was
+pleased to permit." "But," continued she, "what can I do without
+the school; and, alas! I can neither work nor want; and I am wae to
+go on the session, for I am come of a decent family." I comforted
+her, and told her, that I thought she had done so much good in the
+parish, that the session was deep in her debt, and that what they
+might give her was but a just payment for her service. "I would
+rather, however, sir," said she, "try first what some of my auld
+scholars will do, and it was for that I wanted to speak with you.
+If some of them would but just, from time to time, look in upon me,
+that I may not die alane; and the little pick and drap that I
+require would not be hard upon them--I am more sure that in this way
+their gratitude would be no discredit, than I am of having any claim
+on the session."
+
+As I had always a great respect for an honest pride, I assured her
+that I would do what she wanted; and accordingly, the very morning
+after, being Sabbath, I preached a sermon on the helplessness of
+them that have no help of man, meaning aged single women, living in
+garret-rooms, whose forlorn state, in the gloaming of life, I made
+manifest to the hearts and understandings of the congregation, in
+such a manner that many shed tears, and went away sorrowful.
+
+Having thus roused the feelings of my people, I went round the
+houses on the Monday morning, and mentioned what I had to say more
+particularly about poor old Nanse Banks, the schoolmistress, and
+truly I was rejoiced at the condition of the hearts of my people.
+There was a universal sympathy among them; and it was soon ordered
+that, what with one and another, her decay should be provided for.
+But it was not ordained that she should be long heavy on their good-
+will. On the Monday the school was given up, and there was nothing
+but wailing among the bit lassies, the scholars, for getting the
+vacance, as the poor things said, because the mistress was going to
+lie down to dee. And, indeed, so it came to pass; for she took to
+her bed the same afternoon, and, in the course of the week, dwindled
+away, and slipped out of this howling wilderness into the kingdom of
+heaven, on the Sabbath following, as quietly as a blessed saint
+could do. And here I should mention, that the Lady Macadam, when I
+told her of Nanse Banks's case, enquired if she was a snuffer, and,
+being answered by me that she was, her ladyship sent her a pretty
+French enamel box full of macabaw, a fine snuff that she had in a
+bottle; and, among the macabaw, was found a guinea, at the bottom of
+the box, after Nanse Banks had departed this life, which was a kind
+thing of Lady Macadam to do.
+
+About the close of this year there was a great sough of old
+prophecies, foretelling mutations and adversities, chiefly on
+account of the canal that was spoken of to join the rivers of the
+Clyde and the Forth, it being thought an impossible thing to be
+done; and the Adam and Eve pear-tree, in our garden, budded out in
+an awful manner, and had divers flourishes on it at Yule, which was
+thought an ominous thing, especially as the second Mrs Balwhidder
+was at the downlying with my eldest son Gilbert, that is, the
+merchant in Glasgow; but nothing came o't, and the howdie said she
+had an easy time when the child came into the world, which was on
+the very last day of the year, to the great satisfaction of me, and
+of my people, who were wonderful lifted up because their minister
+had a man-child born unto him.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX YEAR 1768
+
+
+
+It's a surprising thing how time flieth away, carrying off our youth
+and strength, and leaving us nothing but wrinkles and the ails of
+old age. Gilbert, my son, that is now a corpulent man, and a
+Glasgow merchant, when I take up my pen to record the memorables of
+this Ann. Dom., seems to me yet but a suckling in swaddling clothes,
+mewing and peevish in the arms of his mother, that has been long
+laid in the cold kirkyard, beside her predecessor, in Abraham's
+bosom. It is not, however, my design to speak much anent my own
+affairs, which would be a very improper and uncomely thing, but only
+of what happened in the parish, this book being for a witness and
+testimony of my ministry. Therefore, setting out of view both me
+and mine, I will now resuscitate the concerns of Mrs Malcolm and her
+children; for, as I think, never was there such a visible
+preordination seen in the lives of any persons, as was seen in that
+of this worthy decent woman, and her well-doing off-spring. Her
+morning was raw, and a sore blight fell upon her fortunes; but the
+sun looked out on her midday, and her evening closed loun and warm;
+and the stars of the firmament, that are the eyes of heaven, beamed
+as it were with gladness, when she lay down to sleep the sleep of
+rest.
+
+Her son Charles was by this time grown up into a stout buirdly lad,
+and it was expected that, before the return of the Tobacco trader,
+he would have been out of his time, and a man afore the mast, which
+was a great step of preferment, as I heard say by persons skilled in
+seafaring concerns. But this was not ordered to happen; for, when
+the Tobacco trader was lying in the harbour of Virginia in the North
+Americas, a pressgang, that was in need of men for a man-of-war,
+came on board, and pressed poor Charles, and sailed away with him on
+a cruise, nobody, for many a day, could tell where, till I thought
+of the Lord Eaglesham's kindness. His lordship having something to
+say with the king's government, I wrote to him, telling him who I
+was, and how jocose he had been when buttoned in my clothes, that he
+might recollect me, thanking him, at the same time, for his
+condescension and patronage to Andrew Lanshaw, in his way to the
+East Indies. I then slipped in, at the end of the letter, a bit
+nota-bene concerning the case of Charles Malcolm, begging his
+lordship, on account of the poor lad's widow mother, to enquire at
+the government if they could tell us any thing about Charles. In
+the due course of time, I got a most civil reply from his lordship,
+stating all about the name of the man-of-war, and where she was; and
+at the conclusion his lordship said, that I was lucky in having the
+brother of a Lord of the Admiralty on this occasion for my agent, as
+otherwise, from the vagueness of my statement, the information might
+not have been procured; which remark of his lordship was long a
+great riddle to me; for I could not think what he meant about an
+agent, till, in the course of the year, we heard that his own
+brother was concerned in the admiralty; so that all his lordship
+meant was only to crack a joke with me, and that he was ever ready
+and free to do, as shall be related in the sequel, for he was an
+excellent man.
+
+There being a vacancy for a schoolmistress, it was proposed to Mrs
+Malcolm, that, under her superintendence, her daughter Kate, that
+had been learning great artifices in needle-work so long with Lady
+Macadam, should take up the school, and the session undertook to
+make good to Kate the sum of five pounds sterling per annum, over
+and above what the scholars were to pay. But Mrs Malcolm said she
+had not strength herself to warsle with so many unruly brats, and
+that Kate, though a fine lassie, was a tempestuous spirit, and might
+lame some of the bairns in her passion; and that selfsame night,
+Lady Macadam wrote me a very complaining letter, for trying to wile
+away her companion; but her ladyship was a canary-headed woman, and
+given to flights and tantrums, having in her youth been a great
+toast among the quality. It would, however, have saved her from a
+sore heart, had she never thought of keeping Kate Malcolm. For this
+year her only son, who was learning the art of war at an academy in
+France, came to pay her, his lady mother, a visit. He was a brisk
+and light-hearted stripling, and Kate Malcolm was budding into a
+very rose of beauty; so between them a hankering began, which, for a
+season, was productive of great heaviness of heart to the poor old
+cripple lady; indeed, she assured me herself, that all her
+rheumatics were nothing to the heart-ache which she suffered in the
+progress of this business. But that will be more treated of
+hereafter; suffice it to say for the present, that we have thus
+recorded how the plan for making Kate Malcolm our schoolmistress
+came to nought. It pleased, however, Him, from whom cometh every
+good and perfect gift, to send at this time among us a Miss Sabrina
+Hooky, the daughter of old Mr Hooky, who had been schoolmaster in a
+neighbouring parish. She had gone, after his death, to live with an
+auntie in Glasgow, that kept a shop in the Gallowgate. It was
+thought that the old woman would have left her heir to all her
+gatherings, and so she said she would, but alas! our life is but
+within our lip. Before her testament was made, she was carried
+suddenly off by an apoplectick, an awful monument of the uncertainty
+of time and the nearness of eternity, in her own shop, as she was in
+the very act of weighing out an ounce of snuff to a professor of the
+College, as Miss Sabrina herself told me. Being thus destitute, it
+happened that Miss Sabrina heard of the vacancy in our parish, as it
+were, just by the cry of a passing bird, for she could not tell how;
+although I judge myself that William Keckle the elder had a hand in
+it, as he was at the time in Glasgow; and she wrote me a wonderful
+well-penned letter bespeaking the situation, which letter came to
+hand on the morn following Lady Macadam's stramash to me about Kate
+Malcolm, and I laid it before the session the same day; so that, by
+the time her auntie's concern was taken off her hands, she had a
+home and a howf among us to come in, to the which she lived upwards
+of thirty years in credit and respect, although some thought she had
+not the art of her predecessor, and was more uppish in her carriage
+than befitted the decorum of her vocation. Hers, however, was but a
+harmless vanity; and, poor woman, she needed all manner of graces to
+set her out; for she was made up of odds and ends, and had but one
+good eye, the other being blind, and just like a blue bead. At
+first she plainly set her cap for Mr Lorimore, but after oggling and
+goggling at him every Sunday in the kirk for a whole half-year and
+more, Miss Sabrina desisted in despair.
+
+But the most remarkable thing about her coming into the parish, was
+the change that took place in Christian names among us. Old Mr
+Hooky, her father, had, from the time he read his Virgil, maintained
+a sort of intromission with the nine muses, by which he was led to
+baptize her Sabrina, after a name mentioned by John Milton in one of
+his works. Miss Sabrina began by calling our Jennies Jessies, and
+our Nannies Nancies; alas! I have lived to see even these likewise
+grow old-fashioned. She had also a taste in the mantua-making line,
+which she had learnt in Glasgow; and I could date from the very
+Sabbath of her first appearance in the kirk, a change growing in the
+garb of the younger lassies, who from that day began to lay aside
+the silken plaidie over the head, the which had been the pride and
+bravery of their grandmothers; and instead of the snood, that was so
+snod and simple, they hided their heads in round-eared bees-cap
+mutches, made of gauze and catgut, and other curious contrivances of
+French millendery; all which brought a deal of custom to Miss
+Sabrina, over and above the incomings and Candlemas offerings of
+school; insomuch that she saved money, and in the course of three
+years had ten pounds to put in the bank.
+
+At the time, these alterations and revolutions in the parish were
+thought a great advantage; but now when I look back upon them, as a
+traveller on the hill over the road he has passed, I have my doubts.
+For with wealth come wants, like a troop of clamorous beggars at the
+heels of a generous man; and it's hard to tell wherein the benefit
+of improvement in a country parish consists, especially to those who
+live by the sweat of their brow. But it is not for me to make
+reflections; my task and duty is to note the changes of time and
+habitudes.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X YEAR 1769
+
+
+
+I have my doubts whether it was in the beginning of this year, or in
+the end of the last, that a very extraordinary thing came to light
+in the parish; but, howsoever that may be, there is nothing more
+certain than the fact, which it is my duty to record. I have
+mentioned already how it was that the toll, or trust-road, was set
+a-going, on account of the Lord Eaglesham's tumbling on the midden
+in the Vennel. Well, it happened to one of the labouring men, in
+breaking the stones to make metal for the new road, that he broke a
+stone that was both large and remarkable, and in the heart of it,
+which was boss, there was found a living creature, that jumped out
+the moment it saw the light of heaven, to the great terrification of
+the man, who could think it was nothing but an evil spirit that had
+been imprisoned therein for a time. The man came to me like a
+demented creature, and the whole clachan gathered out, young and
+old, and I went at their head to see what the miracle could be, for
+the man said it was a fiery dragon, spewing smoke and flames. But
+when we came to the spot, it was just a yird toad, and the laddie
+weans nevelled it to death with stones, before I could persuade them
+to give over. Since then, I have read of such things coming to
+light in the Scots Magazine, a very valuable book.
+
+Soon after the affair of "the wee deil in the stane," as it was
+called, a sough reached us that the Americas were seized with the
+rebellious spirit of the ten tribes, and were snapping their fingers
+in the face of the king's government. The news came on a Saturday
+night, for we had no newspapers in those days, and was brought by
+Robin Modiwort, that fetched the letters from the Irville post.
+Thomas Fullarton (he has been dead many a day) kept the grocery shop
+at Irville, and he had been in at Glasgow, as was his yearly custom,
+to settle his accounts, and to buy a hogshead of tobacco, with sugar
+and other spiceries; and being in Glasgow, Thomas was told by the
+merchant of a great rise in tobacco, that had happened by reason of
+the contumacity of the plantations, and it was thought that blood
+would be spilt before things were ended, for that the King and
+Parliament were in a great passion with them. But as Charles
+Malcolm, in the king's ship, was the only one belonging to the
+parish that was likely to be art and part in the business, we were
+in a manner little troubled at the time with this first gasp of the
+monster of war, who, for our sins, was ordained to swallow up and
+devour so many of our fellow-subjects, before he was bound again in
+the chains of mercy and peace.
+
+I had, in the meantime, written a letter to the Lord Eaglesham, to
+get Charles Malcolm out of the clutches of the pressgang in the man-
+of-war; and about a month after, his lordship sent me an answer,
+wherein was enclosed a letter from the captain of the ship, saying,
+that Charles Malcolm was so good a man that he was reluctant to part
+with him, and that Charles himself was well contented to remain
+aboard. Anent which, his lordship said to me, that he had written
+back to the captain to make a midshipman of Charles, and that he
+would take him under his own protection, which was great joy on two
+accounts to us all, especially to his mother; first, to hear that
+Charles was a good man, although in years still but a youth; and,
+secondly, that my lord had, of his own free-will, taken him under
+the wing of his patronage.
+
+But the sweet of this world is never to be enjoyed without some of
+the sour. The coal bark between Irville and Belfast, in which
+Robert Malcolm, the second son of his mother, was serving his time
+to be a sailor, got a charter, as it was called, to go with to
+Norway for deals, which grieved Mrs Malcolm to the very heart; for
+there was then no short cut by the canal, as now is, between the
+rivers of the Forth and Clyde, but every ship was obligated to go
+far away round by the Orkneys, which, although a voyage in the
+summer not overly dangerous, there being long days and short nights
+then, yet in the winter it was far otherwise, many vessels being
+frozen up in the Baltic till the spring; and there was a story told
+at the time, of an Irville bark coming home in the dead of the year,
+that lost her way altogether, and was supposed to have sailed north
+into utter darkness, for she was never more heard of: and many an
+awful thing was said of what the auld mariners about the shore
+thought concerning the crew of that misfortunate vessel. However,
+Mrs Malcolm was a woman of great faith, and having placed her
+reliance on Him who is the orphan's stay and widow's trust, she
+resigned her bairn into his hands, with a religious submission to
+his pleasure, though the mother's tear of weak human nature was on
+her cheek and in her e'e. And her faith was well rewarded, for the
+vessel brought him safe home, and he had seen such a world of
+things, that it was just to read a story-book to hear him tell of
+Elsineur and Gottenburg, and other fine and great places that we had
+never heard of till that time; and he brought me a bottle of Riga
+balsam, which for healing cuts was just miraculous, besides a clear
+bottle of Rososolus for his mother, a spirit which for cordiality
+could not be told; for though since that time we have had many a
+sort of Dantzic cordial, I have never tasted any to compare with
+Robin Malcolm's Rososolus. The Lady Macadam, who had a knowledge of
+such things, declared it was the best of the best sort; for Mrs
+Malcolm sent her ladyship some of it in a doctor's bottle, as well
+as to Mrs Balwhidder, who was then at the downlying with our
+daughter Janet--a woman now in the married state, that makes a most
+excellent wife, having been brought up with great pains, and well
+educated, as I shall have to record by-and-by.
+
+About the Christmas of this year, Lady Macadam's son having been
+perfected in the art of war at a school in France, had, with the
+help of his mother's friends, and his father's fame, got a stand of
+colours in the Royal Scots regiment; he came to show himself in his
+regimentals to his lady mother, like a dutiful son, as he certainly
+was. It happened that he was in the kirk in his scarlets and gold,
+on the same Sunday that Robert Malcolm came home from the long
+voyage to Norway for deals; and I thought when I saw the soldier and
+the sailor from the pulpit, that it was an omen of war, among our
+harmless country folks, like swords and cannon amidst ploughs and
+sickles, coming upon us; and I became laden in spirit, and had a
+most weighty prayer upon the occasion, which was long after
+remembered, many thinking, when the American war broke out, that I
+had been gifted with a glimmering of prophecy on that day.
+
+It was during this visit to his lady mother, that young Laird
+Macadam settled the correspondence with Kate Malcolm, which, in the
+process of time, caused us all so much trouble; for it was a
+clandestine concern: but the time is not yet ripe for me to speak
+of it more at large. I should, however, mention, before concluding
+this annal, that Mrs Malcolm herself was this winter brought to
+death's door by a terrible host that came on her in the kirk, by
+taking a kittling in her throat. It was a terrification to hear her
+sometimes; but she got the better of it in the spring, and was more
+herself thereafter than she had been for years before; and her
+daughter Effie or Euphemia, as she was called by Miss Sabrina, the
+schoolmistress, was growing up to be a gleg and clever quean; she
+was, indeed, such a spirit in her way, that the folks called her
+Spunkie; while her son William, that was the youngest of the five,
+was making a wonderful proficiency with Mr Lorimore. He was indeed
+a douce, well-doing laddie, of a composed nature; insomuch that the
+master said he was surely chosen for the ministry. In short, the
+more I think on what befell this family, and of the great meekness
+and Christian worth of the parent, I verily believe there never
+could have been in any parish such a manifestation of the truth,
+that they who put their trust in the Lord, are sure of having a
+friend that will never forsake them.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI YEAR 1770
+
+
+
+This blessed Ann. Dom. was one of the Sabbaths of my ministry. When
+I look back upon it, all is quiet and good order: the darkest cloud
+of the smuggling had passed over, at least from my people, and the
+rumours of rebellion in America were but like the distant sound of
+the bars of Ayr. We sat, as it were, in a lown and pleasant place,
+beholding our prosperity, like the apple-tree adorned with her
+garlands of flourishes, in the first fair mornings of the spring,
+when the birds were returning thanks to their Maker for the coming
+again of the seed-time, and the busy bee goeth forth from her cell,
+to gather honey from the flowers of the field, and the broom of the
+hill, and the blue-bells and gowans, which Nature, with a gracious
+and a gentle hand, scatters in the valley, as she walketh forth in
+her beauty, to testify to the goodness of the Father of all mercies.
+
+Both at the spring and the harvest sacraments, the weather was as
+that which is in Paradise; there was a glad composure in all hearts,
+and the minds of men were softened towards each other. The number
+of communicants was greater than had been known for many years, and
+the tables were filled by the pious from many a neighbouring parish:
+those of my hearers who had opposed my placing, declared openly, for
+a testimony of satisfaction and holy thankfulness, that the tent, so
+surrounded as it was on both occasions, was a sight they never had
+expected to see. I was, to be sure, assisted by some of the best
+divines then in the land, but I had not been a sluggard myself in
+the vineyard.
+
+Often, when I think on this year, so fruitful in pleasant
+intimacies, has the thought come into my mind, that as the Lord
+blesses the earth from time to time with a harvest of more than the
+usual increase, so, in like manner, he is sometimes for a season
+pleased to pour into the breasts of mankind a larger portion of
+good-will and charity, disposing them to love one another, to be
+kindly to all creatures, and filled with the delight of thankfulness
+to himself, which is the greatest of blessings.
+
+It was in this year that the Earl of Eaglesham ordered the fair to
+be established in the village; and it was a day of wonderful
+festivity to all the bairns, and lads and lassies, for miles round.
+I think, indeed, that there has never been such a fair as the first
+since; for although we have more mountebanks and merry-andrews now,
+and richer cargoes of groceries and packman's stands, yet there has
+been a falling off in the light-hearted daffing, while the
+hobleshows in the change-houses have been awfully augmented. It was
+on this occasion that Punch's opera was first seen in our country
+side, and surely never was there such a funny curiosity; for
+although Mr Punch himself was but a timber idol, he was as droll as
+a true living thing, and napped with his head so comical; but oh! he
+was a sorrowful contumacious captain, and it was just a sport to see
+how he rampaged, and triumphed, and sang. For months after, the
+laddie weans did nothing but squeak and sing like Punch. In short,
+a blithe spirit was among us throughout this year, and the briefness
+of the chronicle bears witness to the innocency of the time.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII YEAR 1771
+
+
+
+It was in this year that my troubles with Lady Macadam's affair
+began. She was a woman, as I have by hint here and there intimated,
+of a prelatic disposition, seeking all things her own way, and not
+overly scrupulous about the means, which I take to be the true
+humour of prelacy. She was come of a high episcopal race in the
+east country, where sound doctrine had been long but little heard,
+and she considered the comely humility of a presbyter as the
+wickedness of hypocrisy; so that, saving in the way of neighbourly
+visitation, there was no sincere communion between us.
+Nevertheless, with all her vagaries, she had the element of a kindly
+spirit, that would sometimes kythe in actions of charity, that
+showed symptoms of a true Christian grace, had it been properly
+cultivated; but her morals had been greatly neglected in her youth,
+and she would waste her precious time in the long winter nights,
+playing at the cards with her visitors; in the which thriftless and
+sinful pastime, she was at great pains to instruct Kate Malcolm,
+which I was grieved to understand. What, however, I most misliked
+in her ladyship, was a lightness and juvenility of behaviour
+altogether unbecoming her years; for she was far past three-score,
+having been long married without children. Her son, the soldier
+officer, came so late, that it was thought she would have been taken
+up as an evidence in the Douglas cause. She was, to be sure,
+crippled with the rheumatics, and no doubt the time hung heavy on
+her hands; but the best friends of recreation and sport must allow,
+that an old woman, sitting whole hours jingling with that paralytic
+chattel a spinnet, was not a natural object! What, then, could be
+said for her singing Italian songs, and getting all the newest from
+Vauxhall in London, a boxful at a time, with new novel-books, and
+trinkum-trankum flowers and feathers, and sweetmeats, sent to her by
+a lady of the blood royal of Paris? As for the music, she was at
+great pains to instruct Kate, which, with the other things she
+taught, were sufficient, as my lady said herself, to qualify poor
+Kate for a duchess or a governess, in either of which capacities,
+her ladyship assured Mrs Malcolm, she would do honour to her
+instructor, meaning her own self; but I must come to the point anent
+the affair.
+
+One evening, early in the month of January, as I was sitting by
+myself in my closet studying the Scots Magazine, which I well
+remember the new number had come but that very night, Mrs Balwhidder
+being at the time busy with the lasses in the kitchen, and
+superintending, as her custom was, for she was a clever woman, a
+great wool-spinning we then had, both little wheel and meikle wheel,
+for stockings and blankets--sitting, as I was saying, in the study,
+with the fire well gathered up, for a night's reflection, a
+prodigious knocking came to the door, by which the book was almost
+startled out of my hand, and all the wheels in the house were
+silenced at once. This was her ladyship's flunkey, to beg me to go
+to her, whom he described as in a state of desperation.
+Christianity required that I should obey the summons; so, with what
+haste I could, thinking that perhaps, as she had been low-spirited
+for some time about the young laird's going to the Indies, she might
+have got a cast of grace, and been wakened in despair to the state
+of darkness in which she had so long lived, I made as few steps of
+the road between the manse and her house as it was in my ability to
+do.
+
+On reaching the door, I found a great light in the house--candles
+burning up stairs and down stairs, and a sough of something
+extraordinar going on. I went into the dining-room, where her
+ladyship was wont to sit; but she was not there--only Kate Malcolm
+all alone, busily picking bits of paper from the carpet. When she
+looked up, I saw that her eyes were red with weeping, and I was
+alarmed, and said, "Katy, my dear, I hope there is no danger?" Upon
+which the poor lassie rose, and, flinging herself in a chair,
+covered her face with her hands, and wept bitterly.
+
+"What is the old fool doing with the wench?" cried a sharp angry
+voice from the drawing-room--"why does not he come to me?" It was
+the voice of Lady Macadam herself, and she meant me. So I went to
+her; but, oh! she was in a far different state from what I had
+hoped. The pride of this world had got the upper hand of her, and
+was playing dreadful antics with understanding. There was she,
+painted like a Jezebel, with gum-flowers on her head, as was her
+custom every afternoon, sitting on a settee, for she was lame, and
+in her hand she held a letter. "Sir," said she, as I came into the
+room, "I want you to go instantly to that young fellow, your clerk,
+(meaning Mr Lorimore, the schoolmaster, who was likewise session-
+clerk and precentor,) and tell him I will give him a couple of
+hundred pounds to marry Miss Malcolm without delay, and undertake to
+procure him a living from some of my friends."
+
+"Softly, my lady, you must first tell me the meaning of all this
+haste of kindness," said I, in my calm methodical manner. At the
+which she began to cry and sob, like a petted bairn, and to bewail
+her ruin, and the dishonour of her family. I was surprised, and
+beginning to be confounded; at length out it came. The flunkey had
+that night brought two London letters from the Irville post, and
+Kate Malcolm being out of the way when he came home, he took them
+both in to her ladyship on the silver server, as was his custom; and
+her ladyship, not jealousing that Kate could have a correspondence
+with London, thought both the letters were for herself, for they
+were franked; so, as it happened, she opened the one that was for
+Kate, and this, too, from the young laird, her own son. She could
+not believe her eyes when she saw the first words in his hand of
+write; and she read, and she better read, till she read all the
+letter, by which she came to know that Kate and her darling were
+trysted, and that this was not the first love-letter which had
+passed between them. She, therefore, tore it in pieces, and sent
+for me, and screamed for Kate; in short, went, as it were, off at
+the head, and was neither to bind nor to hold on account of this
+intrigue, as she, in her wrath, stigmatised the innocent gallanting
+of poor Kate and the young laird.
+
+I listened in patience to all she had to say anent the discovery,
+and offered her the very best advice; but she derided my judgment;
+and because I would not speak outright to Mr Lorimore, and get him
+to marry Kate off hand, she bade me good-night with an air, and sent
+for him herself. He, however, was on the brink of marriage with his
+present worthy helpmate, and declined her ladyship's proposals,
+which angered her still more. But although there was surely a great
+lack of discretion in all this, and her ladyship was entirely
+overcome with her passion, she would not part with Kate, nor allow
+her to quit the house with me, but made her sup with her as usual
+that night, calling her sometimes a perfidious baggage, and at other
+times, forgetting her delirium, speaking to her as kindly as ever.
+At night, Kate as usual helped her ladyship into her bed, (this she
+told me with tears in her eyes next morning;) and when Lady Macadam,
+as was her wont, bent to kiss her for good-night, she suddenly
+recollected "the intrigue," and gave Kate such a slap on the side of
+the head, as quite dislocated for a time the intellects of the poor
+young lassie. Next morning, Kate was solemnly advised never to
+write again to the laird, while the lady wrote him a letter, which,
+she said, would be as good as a birch to the breech of the boy.
+Nothing, therefore, for some time, indeed, throughout the year, came
+of the matter; but her ladyship, when Mrs Balwhidder soon after
+called on her, said that I was a nose-of-wax, and that she never
+would speak to me again, which surely was not a polite thing to say
+to Mrs Balwhidder, my second wife.
+
+This stramash was the first time I had interposed in the family
+concerns of my people; for it was against my nature to make or
+meddle with private actions saving only such as in course of nature
+came before the session; but I was not satisfied with the principles
+of Lady Macadam, and I began to be weary about Kate Malcolm's
+situation with her ladyship, whose ways of thinking I saw were not
+to be depended on, especially in those things wherein her pride and
+vanity were concerned. But the time ran on--the butterflies and the
+blossoms were succeeded by the leaves and the fruit, and nothing of
+a particular nature farther molested the general tranquillity of
+this year; about the end of which, there came on a sudden frost,
+after a tack of wet weather. The roads were just a sheet of ice,
+like a frozen river; insomuch that the coal-carts could not work;
+and one of our cows, (Mrs Balwhidder said, after the accident, it
+was our best; but it was not so much thought of before,) fell in
+coming from the glebe to the byre, and broke its two hinder legs,
+which obligated us to kill it, in order to put the beast out of
+pain. As this happened after we had salted our mart, it occasioned
+us to have a double crop of puddings, and such a show of hams in the
+kitchen, as was a marvel to our visitors to see.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII YEAR 1772
+
+
+
+On New-Year's night, this year, a thing happened, which, in its own
+nature, was a trifle; but it turned out as a mustard-seed that grows
+into a great tree. One of the elders, who has long been dead and
+gone, came to the manse about a fact that was found out in the
+clachan, and after we had discoursed on it some time, he rose to
+take his departure. I went with him to the door with the candle in
+my hand--it was a clear frosty night, with a sharp wind; and the
+moment I opened the door, the blast blew out the candle, so that I
+heedlessly, with the candlestick in my hand, walked with him to the
+yett without my hat, by which I took a sore cold in my head, that
+brought on a dreadful toothache; insomuch, that I was obligated to
+go into Irville to get the tooth drawn, and this caused my face to
+swell to such a fright, that, on the Sabbath-day, I could not preach
+to my people. There was, however, at that time, a young man, one Mr
+Heckletext, tutor in Sir Hugh Montgomerie's family, and who had
+shortly before been licensed. Finding that I would not be able to
+preach myself, I sent to him, and begged he would officiate for me,
+which he very pleasantly consented to do, being, like all the young
+clergy, thirsting to show his light to the world. 'Twixt the fore
+and afternoon's worship, he took his check of dinner at the manse,
+and I could not but say that he seemed both discreet and sincere.
+Judge, however, what was brewing, when the same night Mr Lorimore
+came and told me, that Mr Heckletext was the suspected person anent
+the fact that had been instrumental, in the hand of a chastising
+Providence, to afflict me with the toothache, in order, as it
+afterwards came to pass, to bring the hidden hypocrisy of the
+ungodly preacher to light. It seems that the donsie lassie who was
+in fault, had gone to the kirk in the afternoon, and seeing who was
+in the pulpit, where she expected to see me, was seized with the
+hysterics, and taken with her crying on the spot, the which being
+untimely, proved the death of both mother and bairn, before the
+thing was properly laid to the father's charge.
+
+This caused a great uproar in the parish. I was sorely blamed to
+let such a man as Mr Heckletext go up into my pulpit, although I was
+as ignorant of his offences as the innocent child that perished;
+and, in an unguarded hour, to pacify some of the elders, who were
+just distracted about the disgrace, I consented to have him called
+before the session. He obeyed the call, and in a manner that I will
+never forget; for he was a sorrow of sin and audacity, and demanded
+to know why, and for what reason, he was summoned. I told him the
+whole affair in my calm and moderate way; but it was oil cast upon a
+burning coal. He flamed up in a terrible passion; threepit at the
+elders that they had no proof whatever of his having had any
+trafficking in the business, which was the case; for it was only a
+notion, the poor deceased lassie never having made a disclosure:
+called them libellous conspirators against his character, which was
+his only fortune, and concluded by threatening to punish them,
+though he exempted me from the injury which their slanderous
+insinuations had done to his prospects in life. We were all
+terrified, and allowed him to go away without uttering a word; and
+sure enough he did bring a plea in the courts of Edinburgh against
+Mr Lorimore and the elders for damages, laid at a great sum.
+
+What might have been the consequence, no one can tell; but soon
+after he married Sir Hugh's house-keeper, and went with her into
+Edinburgh, where he took up a school; and, before the trial came on,
+that is to say, within three months of the day that I myself married
+them, Mrs Heckletext was delivered of a thriving lad bairn, which
+would have been a witness for the elders, had the worst come to the
+worst. This was, indeed, we all thought, a joyous deliverance to
+the parish, and it was a lesson to me never to allow any preacher to
+mount my pulpit, unless I knew something of his moral character.
+
+In other respects, this year passed very peaceably in the parish:
+there was a visible increase of worldly circumstances, and the
+hedges which had been planted along the toll-road, began to put
+forth their branches, and to give new notions of orderlyness and
+beauty to the farmers. Mrs Malcolm heard from time to time from her
+son Charles, on board the man-of-war the Avenger, where he was
+midshipman; and he had found a friend in the captain, that was just
+a father to him. Her second son, Robert, being out of his time at
+Irville, went to the Clyde to look for a berth, and was hired to go
+to Jamaica, in a ship called the Trooper. He was a lad of greater
+sobriety of nature than Charles; douce, honest, and faithful; and
+when he came home, though he brought no limes to me to make punch,
+like his brother, he brought a Muscovy duck to Lady Macadam, who
+had, as I have related, in a manner educated his sister Kate. That
+duck was the first of the kind we had ever seen, and many thought it
+was of the goose species, only with short bowly legs. It was,
+however, a tractable and homely beast; and after some confabulation,
+as my lady herself told Mrs Balwhidder, it was received into
+fellowship by her other ducks and poultry. It is not, however, so
+much on account of the rarity of the creature, that I have
+introduced it here, as for the purpose of relating a wonderful
+operation that was performed on it by Miss Sabrina, the
+schoolmistress.
+
+There happened to be a sack of beans in our stable, and Lady
+Macadam's hens and fowls, which were not overly fed at home through
+the inattention of her servants, being great stravaigers for their
+meat, in passing the door went in to pick, and the Muscovy, seeing a
+hole in the bean-sack, dabbled out a crapful before she was
+disturbed. The beans swelled on the poor bird's stomach, and her
+crap bellied out like the kyte of a Glasgow magistrate, until it was
+just a sight to be seen with its head back on its shoulders. The
+bairns of the clachan followed it up and down, crying, the lady's
+muckle jock's aye growing bigger, till every heart was wae for the
+creature. Some thought it was afflicted with a tympathy, and
+others, that it was the natural way for such-like ducks to cleck
+their young. In short, we were all concerned; and my lady, having a
+great opinion of Miss Sabrina's skill, had a consultation with her
+on the case, at which Miss Sabrina advised, that what she called the
+Caesarean operation should be tried, which she herself performed
+accordingly, by opening the creature's crap, and taking out as many
+beans as filled a mutchkin stoup, after which she sewed it up, and
+the Muscovy went its way to the water-side, and began to swim, and
+was as jocund as ever; insomuch, that in three days after it was
+quite cured of all the consequences of its surfeit.
+
+I had at one time a notion to send an account of this to the Scots
+Magazine, but something always came in the way to prevent me; so
+that it has been reserved for a place in this chronicle, being,
+after Mr Heckletext's affair, the most memorable thing in our
+history of this year.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV YEAR 1773
+
+
+
+In this Ann. Dom. there was something like a plea getting to a head,
+between the session and some of the heritors, about a new school-
+house; the thatch having been torn from the rigging of the old one
+by a blast of wind, on the first Monday of February, by which a
+great snow storm got admission, and the school was rendered utterly
+uninhabitable. The smaller sort of lairds were very willing to come
+into the plan with an extra contribution, because they respected the
+master, and their bairns were at the school; but the gentlemen, who
+had tutors in their own houses, were not so manageable; and some of
+them even went so far as to say, that the kirk, being only wanted on
+Sunday, would do very well for a school all the rest of the week,
+which was a very profane way of speaking; and I was resolved to set
+myself against any such thing, and to labour, according to the power
+and efficacy of my station, to get a new school built.
+
+Many a meeting the session had on the subject; and the heritors
+debated, and discussed, and revised their proceedings, and still no
+money for the needful work was forthcoming. Whereupon it happened
+one morning, as I was rummaging in my scrutoire, that I laid my hand
+on the Lord Eaglesham's letter anent Charles Malcolm; and it was put
+into my head at that moment, that if I was to write to his lordship,
+who was the greatest heritor, and owned now the major part of the
+parish, that by his help and influence I might be an instrument to
+the building of a comfortable new school. Accordingly, I sat down
+and wrote my lord all about the accident, and the state of the
+school-house, and the divisions and seditions among the heritors,
+and sent the letter to him at London by the post the same day,
+without saying a word to any living soul on the subject.
+
+This in me was an advised thought; for, by the return of post, his
+lordship with his own hand, in a most kind manner, authorized me to
+say that he would build a new school at his own cost, and bade me go
+over and consult about it with his steward at the castle, to whom he
+had written by the same post the necessary instructions. Nothing
+could exceed the gladness which the news gave to the whole parish,
+and none said more in behalf of his lordship's bounty and liberality
+than the heritors; especially those gentry who grudged the
+undertaking, when it was thought that it would have to come out of
+their own pock-nook.
+
+In the course of the summer, just as the roof was closing in of the
+school-house, my lord came to the castle with a great company, and
+was not there a day till he sent for me to come over, on the next
+Sunday, to dine with him; but I sent him word that I could not do
+so, for it would be a transgression of the Sabbath, which made him
+send his own gentleman, to make his apology for having taken so
+great a liberty with me, and to beg me to come on the Monday, which
+I accordingly did, and nothing could be better than the discretion
+with which I was used. There was a vast company of English ladies
+and gentlemen, and his lordship, in a most jocose manner, told them
+all how he had fallen on the midden, and how I had clad him in my
+clothes, and there was a wonder of laughing and diversion; but the
+most particular thing in the company, was a large, round-faced man,
+with a wig, that was a dignitary in some great Episcopalian church
+in London, who was extraordinary condescending towards me, drinking
+wine with me at the table, and saying weighty sentences, in a fine
+style of language, about the becoming grace of simplicity and
+innocence of heart, in the clergy of all denominations of
+Christians, which I was pleased to hear; for really he had a proud
+red countenance, and I could not have thought he was so mortified to
+humility within, had I not heard with what sincerity he delivered
+himself, and seen how much reverence and attention was paid to him
+by all present, particularly by my lord's chaplain, who was a pious
+and pleasant young divine, though educated at Oxford for the
+Episcopalian persuasion.
+
+One day, soon after, as I was sitting in my closet conning a sermon
+for the next Sunday, I was surprised by a visit from the dean, as
+the dignitary was called. He had come, he said, to wait on me as
+rector of the parish--for so, it seems, they call a pastor in
+England--and to say, that, if it was agreeable, he would take a
+family dinner with us before he left the castle. I could make no
+objection to this kindness; but said I hoped my lord would come with
+him, and that we would do our best to entertain them with all
+suitable hospitality. About an hour or so after he had returned to
+the castle, one of the flunkeys brought a letter from his lordship,
+to say, that not only he would come with the dean, but that they
+would bring his other guests with them; and that, as they could only
+drink London wine, the butler would send me a hamper in the morning,
+assured, as he was pleased to say, that Mrs Balwhidder would
+otherwise provide good cheer.
+
+This notification, however, was a great trouble to my wife, who was
+only used to manufacture the produce of our glebe and yard to a
+profitable purpose, and not used to the treatment of deans and
+lords, and other persons of quality. However, she was determined to
+stretch a point on this occasion; and we had, as all present
+declared, a charming dinner; for fortunately one of the sows had a
+litter of pigs a few days before, and in addition to a goose, that
+is but a boss bird, we had a roasted pig with an apple in its mouth,
+which was just a curiosity to see; and my lord called it a tithe
+pig; but I told him it was one of Mrs Balwhidder's own clecking,
+which saying of mine made no little sport when expounded to the
+dean.
+
+But, och how! this was the last happy summer that we had for many a
+year in the parish; and an omen of the dule that ensued, was in a
+sacrilegious theft that a daft woman, Jenny Gaffaw, and her idiot
+daughter, did in the kirk, by tearing off and stealing the green
+serge lining of my lord's pew, to make, as they said, a hap for
+their shoulders in the cold weather--saving, however, the sin, we
+paid no attention at the time to the mischief and tribulation that
+so unheard-of a trespass boded to us all. It took place about Yule,
+when the weather was cold and frosty, and poor Jenny was not very
+able to go about seeking her meat as usual. The deed, however, was
+mainly done by her daughter, who, when brought before me, said, "her
+poor mother's back had mair need of claes than the kirk-boards;"
+which was so true a thing, that I could not punish her, but wrote
+anent it to my lord, who not only overlooked the offence, but sent
+orders to the servants at the castle to be kind to the poor woman,
+and the natural, her daughter.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XV YEAR 1774
+
+
+
+When I look back on this year, and compare what happened therein
+with the things that had gone before, I am grieved to the heart, and
+pressed down with an afflicted spirit. We had, as may be read,
+trials and tribulations in the days that were past; and in the rank
+and boisterous times of the smuggling there was much sin and blemish
+among us, but nothing so dark and awful as what fell out in the
+course of this unhappy year. The evil omen of daft Jenny Gaffaw and
+her daughter's sacrilege, had soon a bloody verification.
+
+About the beginning of the month of March in this year, the war in
+America was kindling so fast that the government was obligated to
+send soldiers over the sea, in the hope to quell the rebellious
+temper of the plantations; and a party of a regiment that was
+quartered at Ayr was ordered to march to Greenock, to be there
+shipped off. The men were wild and wicked profligates, without the
+fear of the Lord before their eyes; and some of them had drawn up
+with light women in Ayr, who followed them on their march. This the
+soldiers did not like, not wishing to be troubled with such gear in
+America; so the women, when they got the length of Kilmarnock, were
+ordered to retreat and go home, which they all did but one Jean
+Glaikit, who persisted in her intent to follow her joe, Patrick
+O'Neil, a Catholic Irish corporal. The man did, as he said, all in
+his capacity to persuade her to return, but she was a contumacious
+limmer, and would not listen to reason; so that, in passing along
+our toll-road, from less to more, the miserable wretches fell out,
+and fought, and the soldier put an end to her with a hasty knock on
+the head with his firelock, and marched on after his comrades.
+
+The body of the woman was, about half an hour after, found by the
+scholars of Mr Lorimore's school, who had got the play to see the
+marching, and to hear the drums of the soldiers. Dreadful was the
+shout and the cry throughout the parish at this foul work. Some of
+the farmer lads followed the soldiers on horseback, and others ran
+to Sir Hugh, who was a justice of the peace, for his advice.--Such a
+day as that was!
+
+However, the murderer was taken, and, with his arms tied behind him
+with a cord, he was brought back to the parish, where he confessed
+before Sir Hugh the deed, and how it happened. He was then put in a
+cart, and, being well guarded by six of the lads, was taken to Ayr
+jail.
+
+It was not long after this that the murderer was brought to trial,
+and, being found guilty on his own confession, he was sentenced to
+be executed, and his body to be hung in chains near the spot where
+the deed was done. I thought that all in the parish would have run
+to desperation with horror when the news of this came, and I wrote
+immediately to the Lord Eaglesham to get this done away by the
+merciful power of the government, which he did, to our great solace
+and relief.
+
+In the autumn, the young Laird Macadam, being ordered with his
+regiment for the Americas, got leave from the king to come and see
+his lady mother, before his departure. But it was not to see her
+only, as will presently appear.
+
+Knowing how much her ladyship was averse to the notion he had of
+Kate Malcolm, he did not write of his coming, lest she would send
+Kate out of the way, but came in upon them at a late hour, as they
+were wasting their precious time, as was the nightly wont of my
+lady, with a pack of cards; and so far was she from being pleased to
+see him, that no sooner did she behold his face, but, like a tap of
+tow, she kindled upon both him and Kate, and ordered them out of her
+sight and house. The young folk had discretion: Kate went home to
+her mother, and the laird came to the manse, and begged us to take
+him in. He then told me what had happened; and that, having bought
+a captain's commission, he was resolved to marry Kate, and hoped I
+would perform the ceremony, if her mother would consent. "As for
+mine," said he, "she will never agree; but, when the thing is done,
+her pardon will not be difficult to get; for, with all her whims and
+caprice, she is generous and affectionate." In short, he so wiled
+and beguiled me, that I consented to marry them, if Mrs Malcolm was
+agreeable. "I will not disobey my mother," said he, "by asking her
+consent, which I know she will refuse; and, therefore, the sooner it
+is done the better." So we then stepped over to Mrs Malcolm's
+house, where we found that saintly woman, with Kate and Effie, and
+Willie, sitting peacefully at their fireside, preparing to read
+their Bibles for the night. When we went in, and when I saw Kate,
+that was so ladylike there, with the decent humility of her parent's
+dwelling, I could not but think she was destined for a better
+station; and when I looked at the captain, a handsome youth, I
+thought surely their marriage is made in heaven; and so I said to
+Mrs Malcolm, who after a time consented, and likewise agreed that
+her daughter should go with the captain to America; for her faith
+and trust in the goodness of Providence was great and boundless,
+striving, as it were, to be even with its tender mercies.
+Accordingly, the captain's man was sent to bid the chaise wait that
+had taken him to the lady's, and the marriage was sanctified by me
+before we left Mrs Malcolm's. No doubt, they ought to have been
+proclaimed three several Sabbaths; but I satisfied the session, at
+our first meeting, on account of the necessity of the case. The
+young couple went in the chaise travelling to Glasgow, authorising
+me to break the matter to Lady Macadam, which was a sore task; but I
+was spared from the performance. For her ladyship had come to
+herself, and thinking on her own rashness in sending away Kate and
+the captain in the way she had done, she was like one by herself.
+All the servants were scattered out and abroad in quest of the
+lovers; and some of them, seeing the chaise drive from Mrs Malcolm's
+door with them in it, and me coming out, jealoused what had been
+done, and told their mistress outright of the marriage, which was to
+her like a clap of thunder; insomuch that she flung herself back in
+her settee, and was beating and drumming with her heels on the
+floor, like a madwoman in Bedlam, when I entered the room. For some
+time she took no notice of me, but continued her din; but, by-and-
+by, she began to turn her eyes in fiery glances upon me, till I was
+terrified lest she would fly at me with her claws in her fury. At
+last she stopped all at once, and in a calm voice, said, "But it
+cannot now be helped, where are the vagabonds?"--"They are gone,"
+replied I.--"Gone?" cried she, "gone where?"--"To America, I
+suppose," was my answer; upon which she again threw herself back in
+the settee, and began again to drum and beat with her feet as
+before. But not to dwell on small particularities, let it suffice
+to say, that she sent her coachman on one of her coach horses,
+which, being old and stiff, did not overtake the fugitives till they
+were in their bed at Kilmarnock, where they stopped that night; but
+when they came back to the lady's in the morning, she was as cagey
+and meikle taken up with them, as if they had gotten her full
+consent and privilege to marry from the first. Thus was the first
+of Mrs Malcolm's children well and creditably settled. I have only
+now to conclude with observing, that my son Gilbert was seized with
+the smallpox about the beginning of December, and was blinded by
+them for seventeen days; for the inoculation was not in practice yet
+among us, saving only in the genteel families that went into
+Edinburgh for the education of their children, where it was
+performed by the faculty there.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVI YEAR 1775
+
+
+
+The regular course of nature is calm and orderly, and tempests and
+troubles are but lapses from the accustomed sobriety with which
+Providence works out the destined end of all things. From Yule till
+Pace-Monday there had been a gradual subsidence of our personal and
+parochial tribulations, and the spring, though late, set in bright
+and beautiful, and was accompanied with the spirit of contentment;
+so that, excepting the great concern that we all began to take in
+the American rebellion, especially on account of Charles Malcolm
+that was in the man-of-war, and of Captain Macadam that had married
+Kate, we had throughout the better half of the year but little
+molestation of any sort. I should, however, note the upshot of the
+marriage.
+
+By some cause that I do not recollect, if I ever had it properly
+told, the regiment wherein the captain had bought his commission was
+not sent to the plantations, but only over to Ireland, by which the
+captain and his lady were allowed to prolong their stay in the
+parish with his mother; and he, coming of age while he was among us,
+in making a settlement on his wife, bought the house at the
+Braehead, which was then just built by Thomas Shivers the mason, and
+he gave that house, with a judicious income, to Mrs Malcolm, telling
+her that it was not becoming, he having it in his power to do the
+contrary, that she should any longer be dependent on her own
+industry. For this the young man got a name like a sweet odour in
+all the country side; but that whimsical and prelatic lady his
+mother, just went out of all bounds, and played such pranks for an
+old woman, as cannot be told. To her daughter-in-law, however, she
+was wonderful kind; and, in fitting her out for going with the
+captain to Dublin, it was extraordinary to hear what a paraphernalia
+she provided her with. But who could have thought that in this
+kindness a sore trial was brewing for me!
+
+It happened that Miss Betty Wudrife, the daughter of an heritor, had
+been on a visit to some of her friends in Edinburgh; and being in at
+Edinburgh, she came out with a fine mantle, decked and adorned with
+many a ribbon-knot, such as had never been seen in the parish. The
+Lady Macadam, hearing of this grand mantle, sent to beg Miss Betty
+to lend it to her, to make a copy for young Mrs Macadam. But Miss
+Betty was so vogie with her gay mantle, that she sent back word, it
+would be making it o'er common; which so nettled the old courtly
+lady, that she vowed revenge, and said the mantle would not be long
+seen on Miss Betty. Nobody knew the meaning of her words; but she
+sent privately for Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress, who was aye
+proud of being invited to my lady's, where she went on the Sabbath
+night to drink tea, and read Thomson's SEASONS and Hervey's
+MEDITATIONS for her ladyship's recreation. Between the two, a
+secret plot was laid against Miss Betty and her Edinburgh mantle;
+and Miss Sabrina, in a very treacherous manner, for the which I
+afterwards chided her severely, went to Miss Betty, and got a sight
+of the mantle, and how it was made, and all about it, until she was
+in a capacity to make another like it; by which my lady and her,
+from old silk and satin negligees which her ladyship had worn at the
+French court, made up two mantles of the selfsame fashion as Miss
+Betty's, and, if possible, more sumptuously garnished, but in a
+flagrant fool way. On the Sunday morning after, her ladyship sent
+for Jenny Gaffaw, and her daft daughter Meg, and showed them the
+mantles, and said she would give then half-a-crown if they would go
+with them to the kirk, and take their place in the bench beside the
+elders, and, after worship, walk home before Miss Betty Wudrife.
+The two poor natural things were just transported with the sight of
+such bravery, and needed no other bribe; so, over their bits of
+ragged duds, they put on the pageantry, and walked away to the kirk
+like peacocks, and took their place on the bench, to the great
+diversion of the whole congregation.
+
+I had no suspicion of this, and had prepared an affecting discourse
+about the horrors of war, in which I touched, with a tender hand, on
+the troubles that threatened families and kindred in America; but
+all the time I was preaching, doing my best, and expatiating till
+the tears came into my eyes, I could not divine what was the cause
+of the inattention of my people. But the two vain haverels were on
+the bench under me, and I could not see them; where they sat,
+spreading their feathers and picking their wings, stroking down and
+setting right their finery; with such an air as no living soul could
+see and withstand; while every eye in the kirk was now on them, and
+now at Miss Betty Wudrife, who was in a worse situation than if she
+had been on the stool of repentance.
+
+Greatly grieved with the little heed that was paid to my discourse,
+I left the pulpit with a heavy heart; but when I came out into the
+kirkyard, and saw the two antics linking like ladies, and aye
+keeping in the way before Miss Betty, and looking back and around in
+their pride and admiration, with high heads and a wonderful pomp, I
+was really overcome, and could not keep my gravity, but laughed loud
+out among the graves, and in the face of all my people; who, seeing
+how I was vanquished in that unguarded moment by my enemy, made a
+universal and most unreverent breach of all decorum, at which Miss
+Betty, who had been the cause of all, ran into the first open door,
+and almost fainted away with mortification.
+
+This affair was regarded by the elders as a sinful trespass on the
+orderlyness that was needful in the Lord's house; and they called on
+me at the manse that night, and said it would be a guilty connivance
+if I did not rebuke and admonish Lady Macadam of the evil of her
+way; for they had questioned daft Jenny, and had got at the bottom
+of the whole plot and mischief. But I, who knew her ladyship's
+light way, would fain have had the elders to overlook it, rather
+than expose myself to her tantrums; but they considered the thing as
+a great scandal, so I was obligated to conform to their wishes. I
+might, however, have as well stayed at home, for her ladyship was in
+one of her jocose humours when I went to speak to her on the
+subject; and it was so far from my power to make a proper impression
+on her of the enormity that had been committed, that she made me
+laugh, in spite of my reason, at the fantastical drollery of her
+malicious prank on Miss Betty Wudrife.
+
+It, however, did not end here; for the session, knowing that it was
+profitless to speak to the daft mother and daughter, who had been
+the instruments, gave orders to Willy Howking, the betheral, not to
+let them again so far into the kirk; and Willy, having scarcely more
+sense than them both, thought proper to keep them out next Sunday
+altogether. The twa said nothing at the time, but the adversary was
+busy with them; for, on the Wednesday following, there being a
+meeting of the synod at Ayr, to my utter amazement the mother and
+daughter made their appearance there in all their finery, and raised
+a complaint against me and the session, for debarring them from
+church privileges. No stage play could have produced such an
+effect. I was perfectly dumfoundered; and every member of the synod
+might have been tied with a straw, they were so overcome with this
+new device of that endless woman, when bent on provocation--the Lady
+Macadam; in whom the saying was verified, that old folk are twice
+bairns; for in such plays, pranks, and projects, she was as playrife
+as a very lassie at her sampler; and this is but a swatch to what
+lengths she would go. The complaint was dismissed, by which the
+session and me were assoilzied; but I'll never forget till the day
+of my death what I suffered on that occasion, to be so put to the
+wall by two born idiots.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVII YEAR 1776
+
+
+
+It belongs to the chroniclers of the realm to describe the damage
+and detriment which fell on the power and prosperity of the kingdom,
+by reason of the rebellion, that was fired into open war, against
+the name and authority of the king in the plantations of America;
+for my task is to describe what happened within the narrow bound of
+the pasturage of the Lord's flock, of which, in his bounty and
+mercy, he made me the humble, willing, but alas! the weak and
+ineffectual shepherd.
+
+About the month of February, a recruiting party came to our
+neighbour town of Irville, to beat up for men to be soldiers against
+the rebels; and thus the battle was brought, as it were, to our
+gates; for the very first man that took on with them was one Thomas
+Wilson, a cottar in our clachan, who, up to that time, had been a
+decent and creditable character. He was at first a farmer lad, but
+had forgathered with a doited tawpy, whom he married, and had
+offspring three or four. For some time it was noticed that he had a
+down and thoughtful look, that his cleeding was growing bare, and
+that his wife kept an untrig house, which, it was feared by many,
+was the cause of Thomas going o'er often to the change-house; he
+was, in short, during the greater part of the winter, evidently a
+man foregone in the pleasures of this world, which made all that
+knew him compassionate his situation.
+
+No doubt, it was his household ills that burdened him past bearing,
+and made him go into Irville, when he heard of the recruiting, and
+take on to be a soldier. Such a wally-wallying as the news of this
+caused at every door; for the red-coats--from the persecuting days,
+when the black-cuffs rampaged through the country--soldiers that
+fought for hire were held in dread and as a horror among us, and
+terrible were the stories that were told of their cruelty and
+sinfulness; indeed, there had not been wanting in our time a sample
+of what they were, as witness the murder of Jean Glaikit by Patrick
+O'Neil, the Irish corporal, anent which I have treated at large in
+the memorables of the year 1774.
+
+A meeting of the session was forthwith held; for here was Thomas
+Wilson's wife and all his weans, an awful cess, thrown upon the
+parish; and it was settled outright among us, that Mr Docken, who
+was then an elder, but is since dead, a worthy man, with a soft
+tongue and a pleasing manner, should go to Irville, and get Thomas,
+if possible, released from the recruiters. But it was all in vain;
+the sergeant would not listen to him, for Thomas was a strapping
+lad; nor would the poor infatuated man himself agree to go back, but
+cursed like a cadger, and swore that, if he stayed any longer among
+his plagues, he would commit some rash act; so we were saddled with
+his family, which was the first taste and preeing of what war is
+when it comes into our hearths, and among the breadwinners.
+
+The evil, however, did not stop here. Thomas, when he was dressed
+out in the king's clothes, came over to see his bairns, and take a
+farewell of his friends, and he looked so gallant, that the very
+next market-day another lad of the parish listed with him; but he
+was a ramplor, roving sort of a creature, and, upon the whole, it
+was thought he did well for the parish when he went to serve the
+king.
+
+The listing was a catching distemper. Before the summer was over,
+the other three of the farming lads went off with the drum, and
+there was a wailing in the parish, which made me preach a touching
+discourse. I likened the parish to a widow woman with a small
+family, sitting in her cottage by the fireside, herself spinning
+with an eident wheel, ettling her best to get them a bit and a brat,
+and the poor weans all canty about the hearthstane--the little ones
+at their playocks, and the elder at their tasks--the callans working
+with hooks and lines to catch them a meal of fish in the morning--
+and the lassies working stockings to sell at the next Marymas fair.-
+-And then I likened war to a calamity coming among them--the callans
+drowned at their fishing--the lassies led to a misdoing--and the
+feckless wee bairns laid on the bed of sickness, and their poor
+forlorn mother sitting by herself at the embers of a cauldrife fire;
+her tow done, and no a bodle to buy more; drooping a silent and salt
+tear for her babies, and thinking of days that war gone, and, like
+Rachel weeping for her children, she would not be comforted. With
+this I concluded, for my own heart filled full with the thought, and
+there was a deep sob in the Church; verily it was Rachel weeping for
+her children.
+
+In the latter end of the year, the man-of-war, with Charles Malcolm
+in her, came to the tail of the Bank at Greenock, to press men as it
+was thought, and Charles got leave from his captain to come and see
+his mother; and he brought with him Mr Howard, another midshipman,
+the son of a great parliament man in London, which, as we have
+tasted the sorrow, gave us some insight into the pomp of war,
+Charles was now grown up into a fine young man, rattling, light-
+hearted, and just a cordial of gladness, and his companion was every
+bit like him. They were dressed in their fine gold-laced garbs and
+nobody knew Charles when he came to the clachan, but all wondered,
+for they were on horseback, and rode to the house where his mother
+lived when he went away, but which was then occupied by Miss Sabrina
+and her school. Miss Sabrina had never seen Charles, but she had
+heard of him; and when he enquired for his mother, she guessed who
+he was, and showed him the way to the new house that the captain had
+bought for her.
+
+Miss Sabrina, who was a little overly perjink at times, behaved
+herself on this occasion with a true spirit, and gave her lassies
+the play immediately; so that the news of Charles's return was
+spread by them like wildfire, and there was a wonderful joy in the
+whole town. When Charles had seen his mother, and his sister Effie,
+with that douce and well-mannered lad William, his brother--for of
+their meeting I cannot speak, not being present--he then came with
+his friend to see me at the manse, and was most jocose with me, and,
+in a way of great pleasance, got Mrs Balwhidder to ask his friend to
+sleep at the manse. In short, we had just a ploy the whole two days
+they stayed with us, and I got leave from Lord Eaglesham's steward
+to let them shoot on my lord's land; and I believe every laddie wean
+in the parish attended them to the field. As for old Lady Macadam,
+Charles being, as she said, a near relation, and she having likewise
+some knowledge of his comrade's family, she was just in her element
+with them, though they were but youths; for she a woman naturally of
+a fantastical, and, as I have narrated, given to comical devices,
+and pranks to a degree. She made for them a ball, to which she
+invited all the bonniest lassies, far and near, in the parish, and
+was out of the body with mirth, and had a fiddler from Irville; and
+it was thought by those that were there, that had she not been
+crippled with the rheumatics, she would have danced herself. But I
+was concerned to hear both Charles and his friend, like hungry
+hawks, rejoicing at the prospect of the war, hoping thereby, as soon
+as their midship term was out, to be made lieutenants; saving this,
+there was no allay in the happiness they brought with them to the
+parish, and it was a delight to see how auld and young of all
+degrees made of Charles; for we were proud of him, and none more
+than myself, though he began to take liberties with me, calling me
+old governor; it was, however, in a warm-hearted manner, only I did
+not like it when any of the elders heard. As for his mother, she
+deported herself like a saint on the occasion. There was a
+temperance in the pleasure of her heart, and in her thankfulness,
+that is past the compass of words to describe. Even Lady Macadam,
+who never could think a serious thought all her days, said, in her
+wild way that the gods had bestowed more care in the making of Mrs
+Malcolm's temper, than on the bodies and souls of all the saints in
+the calendar. On the Sunday the strangers attended divine worship,
+and I preached a sermon purposely for them, and enlarged at great
+length and fulness on how David overcame Goliath; and they both told
+me that they had never heard such a good discourse; but I do not
+think they were great judges of preachings. How, indeed, could Mr
+Howard know anything of sound doctrine, being educated, as he told
+me, at Eton school, a prelatic establishment! Nevertheless, he was
+a fine lad; and though a little given to frolic and diversion, he
+had a principle of integrity, that afterwards kythed into much
+virtue; for, during this visit, he took a notion of Effie Malcolm,
+and the lassie of him, then a sprightly and blooming creature, fair
+to look upon, and blithe to see; and he kept up a correspondence
+with her till the war was over, when being a captain of a frigate,
+he came down among us, and they were married by me, as shall be
+related in its proper place.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVIII YEAR 1777
+
+
+
+This may well be called the year of the heavy heart, for we had sad
+tidings of the lads that went away as soldiers to America. First,
+there was a boding in the minds of all their friends that they were
+never to see them more; and their sadness, like a mist spreading
+from the waters and covering the fields, darkened the spirit of the
+neighbours. Secondly, a sound was bruited about that the king's
+forces would have a hot and a sore struggle before the rebels were
+put down, if they were ever put down. Then came the cruel truth of
+all that the poor lads' friends had feared. But it is fit and
+proper that I should relate at length, under their several heads,
+the sorrows and afflictions as they came to pass.
+
+One evening, as I was taking my walk alone, meditating my discourse
+for the next Sabbath--it was shortly after Candlemas--it was a fine
+clear frosty evening, just as the sun was setting. Taking my walk
+alone, and thinking of the dreadfulness of Almighty power, and how
+that, if it was not tempered and restrained by infinite goodness,
+and wisdom, and mercy, the miserable sinner, man, and all things
+that live, would be in a woeful state, I drew near the beild where
+old Widow Mirkland lived by herself, who was grand-mother to Jock
+Hempy, the ramplor lad, that was the second who took on for a
+soldier. I did mind of this at the time; but, passing the house, I
+heard the croon, as it were, of a laden soul busy with the Lord,
+and, not to disturb the holy workings of grace, I paused and
+listened. It was old Mizy Mirkland herself, sitting at the gable of
+the house, looking at the sun setting in all his glory behind the
+Arran hills; but she was not praying--only moaning to herself--an
+oozing out, as it might be called, of the spirit from her heart,
+then grievously oppressed with sorrow, and heavy bodements of grey
+hairs and poverty.--"Yonder it slips awa'," she was saying, "and my
+poor bairn, that's o'er the seas in America, is maybe looking on its
+bright face, thinking of his hame, and aiblins of me, that did my
+best to breed him up in the fear of the Lord; but I couldna warsle
+wi' what was ordained. Ay, Jock! as ye look at the sun gaun down,
+as many a time, when ye were a wee innocent laddie at my knee here,
+I hae bade ye look at him as a type of your Maker, ye will hae a
+sore heart; for ye hae left me in my need, when ye should hae been
+near at hand to help me, for the hard labour and industry with which
+I brought you up. But it's the Lord's will. Blessed be the name of
+the Lord, that makes us to thole the tribulations of this world, and
+will reward us, through the mediation of Jesus, hereafter." She
+wept bitterly as she said this, for her heart was tried, but the
+blessing of a religious contentment was shed upon her; and I stepped
+up to her, and asked about her concerns, for, saving as a
+parishioner, and a decent old woman, I knew little of her. Brief
+was her story; but it was one of misfortune.--"But I will not
+complain," she said, "of the measure that has been meted unto me. I
+was left myself an orphan; when I grew up, and was married to my
+gude-man, I had known but scant and want. Our days of felicity were
+few; and he was ta'en awa' from me shortly after my Mary was born.
+A wailing baby, and a widow's heart, was a' he left me. I nursed
+her with my salt tears, and bred her in straits; but the favour of
+God was with us, and she grew up to womanhood as lovely as the rose,
+and as blameless as the lily. In her time she was married to a
+farming lad. There never was a brawer pair in the kirk, than on
+that day when they gaed there first as man and wife. My heart was
+proud, and it pleased the Lord to chastise my pride--to nip my
+happiness, even in the bud. The very next day he got his arm
+crushed. It never got well again; and he fell into a decay, and
+died in the winter, leaving my Mary far on in the road to be a
+mother.
+
+"When her time drew near, we both happened to be working in the
+yard. She was delving to plant potatoes, and I told her it would do
+her hurt; but she was eager to provide something, as she said, for
+what might happen. Oh! it was an ill-omened word. The same night
+her trouble came on, and before the morning she was a cauld corpse,
+and another wee wee fatherless baby was greeting at my bosom--it was
+him that's noo awa' in America. He grew up to be a fine bairn, with
+a warm heart, but a light head, and, wanting the rein of a father's
+power upon him, was no sa douce as I could have wished; but he was
+no man's foe save his own. I thought, and hoped, as he grew to
+years of discretion, he would have sobered, and been a consolation
+to my old age; but he's gone, and he'll never come back--
+disappointment is my portion in this world, and I have no hope;
+while I can do, I will seek no help, but threescore and fifteen can
+do little, and a small ail is a great evil to an aged woman, who has
+but the distaff for her breadwinner."
+
+I did all that I could to bid her be of good cheer, but the comfort
+of a hopeful spirit was dead within her; and she told me, that by
+many tokens she was assured her bairn was already slain.--"Thrice,"
+said she, "I have seen his wraith--the first time he was in the
+pride of his young manhood, the next he was pale and wan, with a
+bloody and gashy wound in his side, and the third time there was a
+smoke, and, when it cleared away, I saw him in a grave, with neither
+winding-sheet nor coffin."
+
+The tale of this pious and resigned spirit dwelt in mine ear, and,
+when I went home, Mrs Balwhidder thought that I had met with an
+o'ercome, and was very uneasy; so she got the tea soon ready to make
+me better; but scarcely had we tasted the first cup when a loud
+lamentation was heard in the kitchen. This was from that tawpy the
+wife of Thomas Wilson, with her three weans. They had been seeking
+their meat among the farmer houses, and, in coming home, forgathered
+on the road with the Glasgow carrier, who told them that news had
+come, in the London Gazette, of a battle, in which the regiment that
+Thomas had listed in was engaged, and had suffered loss both in rank
+and file; none doubting that their head was in the number of the
+slain, the whole family grat aloud, and came to the manse, bewailing
+him as no more; and it afterwards turned out to be the case, making
+it plain to me that there is a farseeing discernment in the spirit,
+that reaches beyond the scope of our incarnate senses.
+
+But the weight of the war did not end with these afflictions; for,
+instead of the sorrow that the listing caused, and the anxiety
+after, and the grief of the bloody tidings, operating as wholesome
+admonition to our young men, the natural perversity of the human
+heart was more and more manifested. A wonderful interest was raised
+among us all to hear of what was going on in the world; insomuch,
+that I myself was no longer contented with the relation of the news
+of the month in the Scots Magazine, but joined with my father-in-
+law, Mr Kibbock, to get a newspaper twice a-week from Edinburgh. As
+for Lady Macadam, who being naturally an impatient woman, she had
+one sent to her three times a-week from London, so that we had
+something fresh five times every week; and the old papers were lent
+out to the families who had friends in the wars. This was done on
+my suggestion, hoping it would make all content with their peaceable
+lot; but dominion for a time had been given to the power of
+contrariness, and it had quite an opposite effect. It begot a
+curiosity, egging on to enterprise; and, greatly to my sorrow, three
+of the brawest lads in the parish, or in any parish, all in one day
+took on with a party of the Scots Greys that were then lying in Ayr;
+and nothing would satisfy the callans at Mr Lorimore's school, but,
+instead of their innocent plays with girs, and shinties, and
+sicklike, they must go ranking like soldiers, and fight sham-fights
+in bodies. In short, things grew to a perfect hostility, for a
+swarm of weans came out from the schools of Irville on a Saturday
+afternoon, and, forgathering with ours, they had a battle with
+stones on the toll-road, such as was dreadful to hear of; for many a
+one got a mark that day he will take to the grave with him.
+
+It was not, however, by accidents of the field only, that we were
+afflicted; those of the flood, too, were sent likewise against us.
+In the month of October, when the corn was yet in the holms, and on
+the cold land by the river side, the water of Irville swelled to a
+great spait, from bank to brae, sweeping all before it, and roaring,
+in its might, like an agent of divine displeasure, sent forth to
+punish the inhabitants of the earth. The loss of the victual was a
+thing reparable, and those that suffered did not greatly complain;
+for, in other respects, their harvest had been plenteous: but the
+river, in its fury, not content with overflowing the lands, burst
+through the sandy hills with a raging force, and a riving asunder of
+the solid ground, as when the fountains of the great deep were
+broken up. All in the parish was a-foot, and on the hills, some
+weeping and wringing their hands, not knowing what would happen,
+when they beheld the landmarks of the waters deserted, and the river
+breaking away through the country, like the war-horse set loose in
+his pasture, and glorying in his might. By this change in the way
+and channel of the river, all the mills in our parish were left more
+than half a mile from dam or lade; and the farmers through the whole
+winter, till the new mills were built, had to travel through a heavy
+road with their victual, which was a great grievance, and added not
+a little to the afflictions of this unhappy year, which to me were
+not without a particularity, by the death of a full cousin of Mrs
+Balwhidder, my first wife; she was grievously burnt by looting over
+a candle. Her mutch, which was of the high structure then in vogue,
+took fire, and being fastened with corking-pins to a great toupee,
+it could not be got off until she had sustained a deadly injury, of
+which, after lingering long, she was kindly eased by her removal
+from trouble. This sore accident was to me a matter of deep concern
+and cogitation; but as it happened in Tarbolton, and no in our
+parish, I have only alluded to it to show, that when my people were
+chastised by the hand of Providence, their pastor was not spared,
+but had a drop from the same vial.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIX YEAR 1778
+
+
+
+This year was as the shadow of the bygane: there was less actual
+suffering, but what we came through cast a gloom among us, and we
+did not get up our spirits till the spring was far advanced; the
+corn was in the ear, and the sun far towards midsummer height,
+before there was any regular show of gladness in the parish.
+
+It was clear to me that the wars were not to be soon over; for I
+noticed, in the course of this year, that there was a greater
+christening of lad bairns than had ever been in any year during my
+incumbency; and grave and wise persons, observant of the signs of
+the times, said, that it had been long held as a sure
+prognostication of war, when the births of male children outnumbered
+that of females.
+
+Our chief misfortune in this year was a revival of that wicked
+mother of many mischiefs, the smuggling trade, which concerned me
+greatly; but it was not allowed to it to make any thing like a
+permanent stay among us, though in some of the neighbouring
+parishes, its ravages, both in morals and property, were very
+distressing, and many a mailing was sold to pay for the triumphs of
+the cutters and gaugers; for the government was by this time grown
+more eager, and the war caused the king's ships to be out and about,
+which increased the trouble of the smugglers, whose wits in their
+turn were thereby much sharpened.
+
+After Mrs Malcolm, by the settlement of Captain Macadam, had given
+up her dealing, two maiden women, that were sisters, Betty and Janet
+Pawkie, came in among us from Ayr, where they had friends in league
+with some of the laigh land folk, that carried on the contraband
+with the Isle of Man, which was the very eye of the smuggling. They
+took up the tea-selling, which Mrs Malcolm had dropped, and did
+business on a larger scale, having a general huxtry, with
+parliament-cakes, and candles, and pincushions, as well as other
+groceries, in their window. Whether they had any contraband
+dealings, or were only back-bitten, I cannot take it upon me to say;
+but it was jealoused in the parish that the meal in the sacks, that
+came to their door at night, and was sent to the Glasgow market in
+the morning, was not made of corn. They were, however, decent
+women, both sedate and orderly; the eldest, Betty Pawkie, was of a
+manly stature, and had a long beard, which made her have a coarse
+look; but she was, nevertheless, a worthy, well-doing creature, and
+at her death she left ten pounds to the poor of the parish, as may
+be seen in the mortification board that the session put up in the
+kirk as a testification and an example.
+
+Shortly after the revival of the smuggling, an exciseman was put
+among us, and the first was Robin Bicker, a very civil lad that had
+been a flunkey with Sir Hugh Montgomerie, when he was a residenter
+in Edinburgh, before the old Sir Hugh's death. He was a queer
+fellow, and had a coothy way of getting in about folk, the which was
+very serviceable to him in his vocation; nor was he overly gleg:
+but when a job was ill done, and he was obliged to notice it, he
+would often break out on the smugglers for being so stupid, so that
+for an exciseman he was wonderful well liked, and did not object to
+a waught of brandy at a time; when the auld wives ca'd it well-
+water. It happened, however, that some unneighbourly person sent
+him notice of a clecking of tea chests, or brandy kegs, at which
+both Jenny and Betty Pawkie were the howdies. Robin could not but
+therefore enter their house; however, before going in, he just cried
+at the door to somebody on the road, so as to let the twa
+industrious lassies hear he was at hand. They were not slack in
+closing the trance-door, and putting stoups and stools behind it, so
+as to cause trouble, and give time before any body could get in.
+They then emptied their chaff-bed, and filled the tikeing with tea,
+and Betty went in on the top, covering herself with the blanket, and
+graining like a woman in labour. It was thought that Robin Bicker
+himself would not have been overly particular in searching the
+house, considering there was a woman seemingly in the death-thraws;
+but a sorner, an incomer from the east country, and that hung about
+the change-house as a divor hostler, that would rather gang a day's
+journey in the dark than turn a spade in day-light, came to him as
+he stood at the door, and went in with him to see the sport. Robin,
+for some reason, could not bid him go away, and both Betty and Janet
+were sure he was in the plot against them; indeed, it was always
+thought he was an informer, and no doubt he was something not canny,
+for he had a down look.
+
+It was some time before the doorway was cleared of the stoups and
+stools, and Jenny was in great concern, and flustered, as she said,
+for her poor sister, who was taken with a heart-colic. "I'm sorry
+for her," said Robin, "but I'll be as quiet as possible;" and so he
+searched all the house, but found nothing; at the which his
+companion, the divor east country hostler, swore an oath that could
+not be misunderstood; so, without more ado, but as all thought
+against the grain, Robin went up to sympathize with Betty in the
+bed, whose groans were loud and vehement. "Let me feel your pulse,"
+said Robin, and he looted down as she put forth her arm from aneath
+the clothes, and laying his hand on the bed, cried, "Hey! what's
+this? this is a costly filling." Upon which Betty jumpet up quite
+recovered, and Jenny fell to the wailing and railing, while the
+hostler from the east country took the bed of tea on his back, to
+carry it to the change-house, till a cart was gotten to take it into
+the custom-house at Irville.
+
+Betty Pawkie being thus suddenly cured, and grudging the loss of
+property, took a knife in her hand, and as the divor was crossing
+the burn at the stepping-stones that lead to the back of the change-
+house, she ran after him and ripped up the tikeing, and sent all the
+tea floating away on the burn, which was thought a brave action of
+Betty, and the story not a little helped to lighten our melancholy
+meditations.
+
+Robin Bicker was soon after this affair removed to another district,
+and we got in his place one Mungo Argyle, who was as proud as a
+provost, being come of Highland parentage. Black was the hour he
+came among my people; for he was needy and greedy, and rode on the
+top of his commission. Of all the manifold ills in the train of
+smuggling, surely the excisemen are the worst, and the setting of
+this rabiator over us was a severe judgment for our sins. But he
+suffered for't, and peace be with him in the grave, where the wicked
+cease from troubling!
+
+Willie Malcolm, the youngest son of his mother, had by this time
+learned all that Mr Lorimore, the schoolmaster, could teach; and as
+it was evidenced to every body, by his mild manners and saintliness
+of demeanour, that he was a chosen vessel, his mother longed to
+fulfil his own wish, which was doubtless the natural working of the
+act of grace that had been shed upon him; but she had not the
+wherewithal to send him to the college of Glasgow, where he was
+desirous to study, and her just pride would not allow her to cess
+his brother-in-law, the Captain Macadam, whom, I should now mention,
+was raised in the end of this year, as we read in the newspapers, to
+be a major. I thought her in this somewhat unreasonable, for she
+would not be persuaded to let me write to the captain; but when I
+reflected on the good that Willie Malcolm might in time do as a
+preacher, I said nothing more to her, but indited a letter to the
+Lord Eaglesham, setting forth the lad's parts, telling who he was
+and all about his mother's scruples; and, by the retour of the post
+from London his lordship sent me an order on his steward, to pay me
+twenty pounds towards equipping my protegee, as he called Willie,
+with a promise to pay for his education, which was such a great
+thing for his lordship to do off-hand on my recommendation, that it
+won much affection throughout the country side; and folks began to
+wonder, rehearsing the great things, as was said, that I had gotten
+my lord at different times, and on divers occasions, to do, which
+had a vast of influence among my brethren of the presbytery, and
+they grew into a state of greater cordiality with me, looking on me
+as a man having authority; but I was none thereat lifted up, for not
+being gifted with the power of a kirk-filling eloquence, I was but
+little sought for at sacraments, and fasts, and solemn days, which
+was doubtless well ordained; for I had no motive to seek fame in
+foreign pulpits, but was left to walk in the paths of simplicity
+within my own parish. To eschew evil myself, and to teach others to
+do the same, I thought the main duties of the pastoral office, and
+with a sincere heart endeavoured what in me lay to perform them with
+meekness, sobriety, and a spirit wakeful to the inroads of sin and
+Satan. But oh, the sordiness of human nature!--The kindness of the
+Lord Eaglesham's own disposition was ascribed to my influence, and
+many a dry answer I was obliged to give to applicants that would
+have me trouble his lordship, as if I had a claim upon him. In the
+ensuing year, the notion of my cordiality with him came to a great
+head, and brought about an event, that could not have been
+forethought by me as a thing within the compass of possibility to
+bring to pass.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XX YEAR 1779
+
+
+
+I was named in this year for the General Assembly, and Mrs
+Balwhidder, by her continual thrift, having made our purse able to
+stand a shake against the wind, we resolved to go into Edinburgh in
+a creditable manner. Accordingly, in conjunct with Mrs Dalrymple,
+the lady of a major of that name, we hired the Irville chaise, and
+we put up in Glasgow, at the Black Boy, where we stayed all night.
+Next morning, by seven o'clock, we got into a fly-coach for the
+capital of Scotland, which we reached after a heavy journey about
+the same hour in the evening, and put up at the public where it
+stopped till the next day; for really both me and Mrs Balwhidder
+were worn out with the undertaking, and found a cup of tea a vast
+refreshment.
+
+Betimes, in the morning, having taken our breakfast, we got a caddy
+to guide us and our wallise to Widow M'Vicar's, at the head of the
+Covenanters' Close. She was a relation to my first wife, Betty
+Lanshaw, my own full cousin that was, and we had advised her, by
+course of post, of our coming, and intendment to lodge with her as
+uncos and strangers. But Mrs M'Vicar kept a cloth shop, and sold
+plaidings and flannels, besides Yorkshire superfines, and was used
+to the sudden incoming of strangers, especially visitants, both from
+the West and the North Highlands, and was withal a gawsy furthy
+woman, taking great pleasure in hospitality, and every sort of
+kindliness and discretion. She would not allow of such a thing as
+our being lodgers in her house, but was so cagey to see us, and to
+have it in her power to be civil to a minister, as she was pleased
+to say, of such repute, that nothing less would content her but that
+we must live upon her, and partake of all the best that could be
+gotten for us within the walls of "the gude town."
+
+When we found ourselves so comfortable, Mrs Balwhidder and me waited
+on my patron's family that was, the young ladies, and the laird, who
+had been my pupil, but was now an advocate high in the law. They
+likewise were kind also. In short, every body in Edinburgh were in
+a manner wearisome kind, and we could scarcely find time to see the
+Castle and the palace of Holyrood-house, and that more sanctified
+place, where the Maccabeus of the Kirk of Scotland, John Knox, was
+wont to live.
+
+Upon my introduction to his grace the Commissioner, I was delighted
+and surprised to find the Lord Eaglesham at the levee, and his
+lordship was so glad on seeing me, that he made me more kenspeckle
+than I could have wished to have been in his grace's presence; for,
+owing to the same, I was required to preach before his grace, upon a
+jocose recommendation of his lordship; the which gave me great
+concern, and daunted me so that in the interim I was almost bereft
+of all peace and studious composure of mind. Fain would I have
+eschewed the honour that was thus thrust upon me; but both my wife
+and Mrs M'Vicar were just lifted out of themselves with the thought.
+
+When the day came, I thought all things in this world were loosened
+from their hold, and that the sure and steadfast earth itself was
+grown coggly beneath my feet, as I mounted the pulpit. With what
+sincerity I prayed for help that day! and never stood man more in
+need of it; for through all my prayer the congregation was so
+watchful and still, doubtless to note if my doctrine was orthodox,
+that the beating of my heart might have been heard to the uttermost
+corners of the kirk.
+
+I had chosen as my text, from Second Samuel, xixth chapter and 35th
+verse, these words--"Can I hear any more the voice of singing men
+and singing women? Wherefore, then, should thy servant be yet a
+burden to the king?" And hardly had I with a trembling voice read
+the words, when I perceived an awful stir in the congregation; for
+all applied the words to the state of the church, and the
+appointment of his grace the Commissioner. Having paused after
+giving out the text, the same fearful and critical silence again
+ensued, and every eye was so fixed upon me, that I was for a time
+deprived of courage to look about; but heaven was pleased to
+compassionate my infirmity, and as I proceeded, I began to warm as
+in my own pulpit. I described the gorgeous Babylonian harlot riding
+forth in her chariots of gold and silver, with trampling steeds and
+a hurricane of followers, drunk with the cup of abominations, all
+shouting with revelry, and glorying in her triumph, treading down in
+their career those precious pearls, the saints and martyrs, into the
+mire beneath their swinish feet. "Before her you may behold
+Wantonness playing the tinkling cymbal, Insolence beating the drum,
+and Pride blowing the trumpet. Every vice is there with his
+emblems; and the seller of pardons, with his crucifix and triple
+crown, is distributing his largess of perdition. The voices of men
+shout to set wide the gates, to give entrance to the queen of
+nations, and the gates are set wide, and they all enter. The
+avenging gates close on them--they are all shut up in hell."
+
+There was a sough in the kirk as I said these words; for the vision
+I described seemed to be passing before me as I spoke, and I felt as
+if I had witnessed the everlasting destruction of Antichrist, and
+the worshippers of the Beast. But soon recovering myself, I said in
+a soft and gentle manner, "Look at yon lovely creature in virgin-
+raiment, with the Bible in her hand. See how mildly she walks
+along, giving alms to the poor as she passes on towards the door of
+that lowly dwelling--Let us follow her in--She takes her seat in the
+chair at the bedside of the poor old dying sinner; and as he tosses
+in the height of penitence and despair, she reads to him the promise
+of the Saviour--'This night thou shalt be with me in Paradise;' and
+he embraces her with transports, and, falling back on his pillow,
+calmly closes his eyes in peace. She is the true religion; and when
+I see what she can do even in the last moments of the guilty, well
+may we exclaim, when we think of the symbols and pageantry of the
+departed superstition, Can I hear any more the voice of singing men
+and singing women? No; let us cling to the simplicity of the Truth
+that is now established in our native land."
+
+At the conclusion of this clause of my discourse, the congregation,
+which had been all so still and so solemn, never coughing, as was
+often the case among my people, gave a great rustle, changing their
+positions, by which I was almost overcome; however, I took heart and
+ventured on, and pointed out that, with our Bible and an orthodox
+priesthood, we stood in no need of the king's authority, however
+bound we were, in temporal things, to respect it; and I showed this
+at some length, crying out in the words of my text, "Wherefore,
+then, should thy servant be yet a burden to the king?" in the saying
+of which I happened to turn my eyes towards his grace the
+Commissioner, as he sat on the throne, and I thought his countenance
+was troubled, which made me add, that he might not think I meant him
+any offence, "That the King of the Church was one before whom the
+great, and the wise, and the good--all doomed and sentenced
+convicts--implore his mercy." "It is true," said I, "that in the
+days of his tribulation he was wounded for our iniquities, and died
+to save us; but, at his death, his greatness was proclaimed by the
+quick and the dead. There was sorrow, and there was wonder, and
+there was rage, and there was remorse; but there was no shame there-
+-none blushed on that day at that sight but yon glorious luminary."
+The congregation rose, and looked round, as the sun that I pointed
+at shone in at the window. I was disconcerted by their movement,
+and my spirit was spent, so that I could say no more.
+
+When I came down from the pulpit, there was a great pressing in of
+acquaintance and ministers, who lauded me exceedingly; but I thought
+it could be only in derision, therefore I slipped home to Mrs
+M'Vicar's as fast as I could.
+
+Mrs M'Vicar, who was a clever, hearing-all sort of a neighbour, said
+my sermon was greatly thought of, and that I had surprised
+everybody; but I was fearful there was something of jocularity at
+the bottom of this, for she was a flaunty woman, and liked well to
+give a good-humoured gibe or jeer. However, his grace the
+Commissioner was very thankful for the discourse, and complimented
+me on what he called my apostolical earnestness; but he was a
+courteous man, and I could not trust to him, especially as my lord
+Eaglesham had told me in secrecy before--it's true, it was in his
+gallanting way--that, in speaking of the king's servant as I had
+done, I had rather gone beyond the bounds of modern moderation.
+Altogether, I found neither pleasure nor profit in what was thought
+so great an honour, but longed for the privacy of my own narrow
+pasture, and little flock.
+
+It was in this visit to Edinburgh that Mrs Balwhidder bought her
+silver teapot, and other ornamental articles; but this was not done,
+as she assured me, in a vain spirit of bravery, which I could not
+have abided, but because it was well known that tea draws better in
+a silver pot, and drinks pleasanter in a china cup, than out of any
+other kind of cup or teapot.
+
+By the time I got home to the manse, I had been three whole weeks
+and five days absent, which was more than all my absences together,
+from the time of my placing; and my people were glowing with
+satisfaction when they saw us driving in a Glasgow chaise through
+the clachan to the manse.
+
+The rest of the year was merely a quiet succession of small
+incidents, none of which are worthy of notation, though they were
+all severally, no doubt, of aught somewhere, as they took us both
+time and place in the coming to pass, and nothing comes to pass
+without helping onwards to some great end; each particular little
+thing that happens in the world being a seed sown by the hand of
+Providence to yield an increase, which increase is destined, in its
+turn, to minister to some higher purpose, until at last the issue
+affects the whole earth. There is nothing in all the world that
+doth not advance the cause of goodness; no, not even the sins of the
+wicked, though, through the dim casement of her mortal tabernacle,
+the soul of man cannot discern the method thereof.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXI YEAR 1780
+
+
+
+This was, among ourselves, another year of few events. A sound, it
+is true, came among us of a design, on the part of the government in
+London, to bring back the old harlotry of papistry; but we spent our
+time in the lea of the hedge, and the lown of the hill. Some there
+were that a panic seized upon when they heard of Lord George Gordon,
+that zealous Protestant, being committed to the Tower; but for my
+part, I had no terror upon me, for I saw all things around me going
+forward improving; and I said to myself, it is not so when
+Providence permits scathe and sorrow to fall upon a nation. Civil
+troubles, and the casting down of thrones, is always forewarned by
+want and poverty striking the people. What I have, therefore,
+chiefly to record as the memorables of this year, are things of
+small import--the main of which are, that some of the neighbouring
+lairds, taking example by Mr Kibbock, my father-in-law that was,
+began in this fall to plant the tops of their hills with mounts of
+fir-trees; and Mungo Argyle, the exciseman, just herried the poor
+smugglers to death, and made a power of prize-money, which, however,
+had not the wonted effect of riches, for it brought him no honour;
+and he lived in the parish like a leper, or any other kind of
+excommunicated person.
+
+But I should not forget a most droll thing that took place with
+Jenny Gaffaw, and her daughter. They had been missed from the
+parish for some days, and folk began to be uneasy about what could
+have become of the two silly creatures; till one night, at the dead
+hour, a strange light was seen beaming and burning at the window of
+the bit hole where they lived. It was first observed by Lady
+Macadam, who never went to bed at any Christian hour, but sat up
+reading her new French novels and play-books with Miss Sabrina, the
+schoolmistress. She gave the alarm, thinking that such a great and
+continuous light from a lone house, where never candle had been seen
+before, could be nothing less than the flame of a burning. And
+sending Miss Sabrina and the servants to see what was the matter,
+they beheld daft Jenny, and her as daft daughter, with a score of
+candle doups, (Heaven only knows where they got them!) placed in the
+window, and the twa fools dancing, and linking, and admiring before
+the door. "What's all this about, Jenny," said Miss Sabrina.--"Awa'
+wi' you, awa' wi' you--ye wicked pope, ye whore of Babylon--is na it
+for the glory of God, and the Protestant religion? d'ye think I will
+be a pope as long as light can put out darkness?"--And with that the
+mother and daughter began again to leap and dance as madly as
+before.
+
+It seems that poor Jenny, having heard of the luminations that were
+lighted up through the country on the ending of the Popish Bill,
+had, with Meg, travelled by themselves into Glasgow, where they had
+gathered or begged a stock of candles, and coming back under the
+cloud of night, had surprised and alarmed the whole clachan, by
+lighting up their window in the manner that I have described. Poor
+Miss Sabrina, at Jenny's uncivil salutation, went back to my lady
+with her heart full, and would fain have had the idiots brought to
+task before the session, for what they had said to her. But I would
+not hear tell of such a thing, for which Miss Sabrina owed me a
+grudge that was not soon given up. At the same time, I was grieved
+to see the testimonies of joyfulness for a holy victory, brought
+into such disrepute by the ill-timed demonstrations of the two
+irreclaimable naturals, that had not a true conception of the cause
+for which they were triumphing.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXII YEAR 1781
+
+
+
+If the two last years passed o'er the heads of me and my people
+without any manifest dolour, which is a great thing to say for so
+long a period in this world, we had our own trials and tribulations
+in the one of which I have now to make mention. Mungo Argyle, the
+exciseman, waxing rich, grew proud and petulant, and would have
+ruled the country side with a rod of iron. Nothing less would serve
+him than a fine horse to ride on, and a world of other conveniences
+and luxuries, as if he had been on an equality with gentlemen. And
+he bought a grand gun, which was called a fowling-piece; and he had
+two pointer dogs, the like of which had not been seen in the parish
+since the planting of the Eaglesham-wood on the moorland, which was
+four years before I got the call. Every body said the man was fey;
+and truly, when I remarked him so gallant and gay on the Sabbath at
+the kirk, and noted his glowing face and gleg een, I thought at
+times there was something no canny about him. It was indeed clear
+to be seen, that the man was hurried out of himself; but nobody
+could have thought that the death he was to dree would have been
+what it was.
+
+About the end of summer my Lord Eaglesham came to the castle,
+bringing with him an English madam, that was his Miss. Some days
+after he came down from London, as he was riding past the manse, his
+lordship stopped to enquire for my health, and I went to the door to
+speak to him. I thought that he did not meet me with that blithe
+countenance he was wont, and in going away, he said with a blush, "I
+fear I dare not ask you to come to the castle." I had heard of his
+concubine, and I said, "In saying so, my lord, you show a spark of
+grace; for it would not become me to see what I have heard; and I am
+surprised, my lord, you will not rather take a lady of your own."
+He looked kindly, but confused, saying, he did not know where to get
+one; so seeing his shame, and not wishing to put him out of conceit
+entirely with himself, I replied, "Na, na, my lord, there's nobody
+will believe that, for there never was a silly Jock, but there was
+as silly a Jenny," at which he laughed heartily, and rode away. But
+I know not what was in't; I was troubled in mind about him, and
+thought, as he was riding away, that I would never see him again;
+and sure enough it so happened; for the next day, being airing in
+his coach with Miss Spangle, the lady he had brought, he happened to
+see Mungo Argyle with his dogs and his gun, and my lord being as
+particular about his game as the other was about boxes of tea and
+kegs of brandy, he jumped out of the carriage, and ran to take the
+gun. Words passed, and the exciseman shot my lord. Never shall I
+forget that day; such riding, such running, the whole country side
+afoot; but the same night my lord breathed his last; and the mad and
+wild reprobate that did the deed was taken up and sent off to
+Edinburgh. This was a woeful riddance of that oppressor, for my
+lord was a good landlord and a kind-hearted man; and albeit, though
+a little thoughtless, was aye ready to make his power, when the way
+was pointed out, minister to good works. The whole parish mourned
+for him, and there was not a sorer heart in all its bounds than my
+own. Never was such a sight seen as his burial: the whole country
+side was there, and all as solemn as if they had been assembled in
+the valley of Jehoshaphat in the latter day. The hedges where the
+funeral was to pass were clad with weans, like bunches of hips and
+haws, and the kirkyard was as if all its own dead were risen.
+Never, do I think, was such a multitude gathered together. Some
+thought there could not be less than three thousand grown men,
+besides women and children.
+
+Scarcely was this great public calamity past, for it could be
+reckoned no less, when one Saturday afternoon, as Miss Sabrina, the
+schoolmistress, was dining with Lady Macadam, her ladyship was
+stricken with the paralytics, and her face so thrown in the course
+of a few minutes, that Miss Sabrina came flying to the manse for the
+help and advice of Mrs Balwhidder. A doctor was gotten with all
+speed by express; but her ladyship was smitten beyond the reach of
+medicine. She lived, however, some time after; but oh! she was such
+an object, that it was a grief to see her. She could only mutter
+when she tried to speak, and was as helpless as a baby. Though she
+never liked me, nor could I say there was many things in her
+demeanour that pleased me; yet she was a free-handed woman to the
+needful, and when she died she was more missed than it was thought
+she could have been.
+
+Shortly after her funeral, which was managed by a gentleman sent
+from her friends in Edinburgh, that I wrote to about her condition,
+the Major, her son, with his lady, Kate Malcolm, and two pretty
+bairns, came and stayed in her house for a time, and they were a
+great happiness to us all, both in the way of drinking tea, and
+sometimes taking a bit of dinner, their only mother now, the worthy
+and pious Mrs Malcolm, being regularly of the company.
+
+Before the end of the year, I should mention, that the fortune of
+Mrs Malcolm's family got another shove upwards, by the promotion of
+her second son, Robert Malcolm, who, being grown an expert and
+careful mariner, was made captain of a grand ship, whereof Provost
+Maitland of Glasgow, that was kind to his mother in her distresses,
+was the owner. But that douce lad Willie, her youngest son, who was
+at the university of Glasgow under the Lord Eaglesham's patronage,
+was like to have suffered a blight. However, Major Macadam, when I
+spoke to him anent the young man's loss of his patron, said, with a
+pleasant generosity, he should not be stickit; and, accordingly, he
+made up, as far as money could, for the loss of his lordship; but
+there was none that made up for the great power and influence,
+which, I have no doubt, the Earl would have exerted in his behalf,
+when he was ripened for the church. So that, although in time
+William came out a sound and heart-searching preacher, he was long
+obliged, like many another unfriended saint, to cultivate sand, and
+wash Ethiopians in the shape of an east country gentleman's
+camstrairy weans; than which, as he wrote me himself, there cannot
+be on earth a greater trial of temper. However, in the end he was
+rewarded, and is not only now a placed minister, but a doctor of
+divinity.
+
+The death of Lady Macadam was followed by another parochial
+misfortune; for, considering the time when it happened, we could
+count it as nothing less. Auld Thomas Howkings, the betheral, fell
+sick, and died in the course of a week's illness, about the end of
+November; and the measles coming at that time upon the parish, there
+was such a smashery of the poor weans as had not been known for an
+age; insomuch that James Banes, the lad who was Thomas Howkings'
+helper, rose in open rebellion against the session during his
+superior's illness; and we were constrained to augment his pay, and
+to promise him the place if Thomas did not recover, which it was
+then thought he could not do. On the day this happened, there were
+three dead children in the clachan, and a panic and consternation
+spread about the burial of them when James Bane's insurrection was
+known, which made both me and the session glad to hush up the
+affair, that the heart of the public might have no more than the
+sufferings of individuals to hurt it.--Thus ended a year, on many
+accounts, heavy to be remembered.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIII YEAR 1782
+
+
+
+Although I have not been particular in noticing it, from time to
+time, there had been an occasional going off, at fairs and on
+market-days, of the lads of the parish as soldiers, and when Captain
+Malcolm got the command of his ship, no less than four young men
+sailed with him from the clachan; so that we were deeper and deeper
+interested in the proceedings of the doleful war that was raging in
+the plantations. By one post we heard of no less than three brave
+fellows belonging to us being slain in one battle, for which there
+was a loud and general lamentation.
+
+Shortly after this, I got a letter from Charles Malcolm, a very
+pretty letter it indeed was: he had heard of my Lord Eaglesham's
+murder, and grieved for the loss, both because his lordship was a
+good man, and because he had been such a friend to him and his
+family. "But," said Charles, "the best way I can show my gratitude
+for his patronage, is to prove myself a good officer to my king and
+country." Which I thought a brave sentiment, and was pleased
+thereat; for somehow Charles, from the time he brought me the limes
+to make a bowl of punch, in his pocket from Jamaica, had built a
+nest of affection in my heart. But, oh! the wicked wastry of life
+in war. In less than a month after, the news came of a victory over
+the French fleet, and by the same post I got a letter from Mr
+Howard, that was the midshipman who came to see us with Charles,
+telling me that poor Charles had been mortally wounded in the
+action, and had afterwards died of his wounds. "He was a hero in
+the engagement," said Mr Howard, "and he died as a good and a brave
+man should."--These tidings gave me one of the sorest hearts I ever
+suffered, and it was long before I could gather fortitude to
+disclose the tidings to poor Charles's mother. But the callants of
+the school had heard of the victory, and were going shouting about,
+and had set the steeple bell a-ringing, by which Mrs Malcolm heard
+the news; and knowing that Charles's ship was with the fleet, she
+came over to the manse in great anxiety to hear the particulars,
+somebody telling her that there had been a foreign letter to me by
+the postman.
+
+When I saw her I could not speak, but looked at her in pity, and,
+the tear fleeing up into my eyes, she guessed what had happened.
+After giving a deep and sore sigh, she enquired, "How did he behave?
+I hope well, for he was aye a gallant laddie!"--and then she wept
+very bitterly. However, growing calmer, I read to her the letter;
+and, when I had done, she begged me to give it to her to keep,
+saying, "It's all that I have now left of my pretty boy; but it's
+mair precious to me than the wealth of the Indies;" and she begged
+me to return thanks to the Lord for all the comforts and manifold
+mercies with which her lot had been blessed, since the hour she put
+her trust in him alone; and that was when she was left a penniless
+widow, with her five fatherless bairns.
+
+It was just an edification of the spirit to see the Christian
+resignation of this worthy woman. Mrs Balwhidder was confounded,
+and said, there was more sorrow in seeing the deep grief of her
+fortitude than tongue could tell.
+
+Having taken a glass of wine with her, I walked out to conduct her
+to her own house; but in the way we met with a severe trial. All
+the weans were out parading with napkins and kail-blades on sticks,
+rejoicing and triumphing in the glad tidings of victory. But when
+they saw me and Mrs Malcolm coming slowly along, they guessed what
+had happened, and threw away their banners of joy; and standing all
+up in a row, with silence and sadness, along the kirkyard wall as we
+passed, showed an instinct of compassion that penetrated to my very
+soul. The poor mother burst into fresh affliction, and some of the
+bairns into an audible weeping; and, taking one another by the hand,
+they followed us to her door, like mourners at a funeral. Never was
+such a sight seen in any town before. The neighbours came to look
+at it as we walked along, and the men turned aside to hide their
+faces; while the mothers pressed their babies fondlier to their
+bosoms, and watered their innocent faces with their tears.
+
+I prepared a suitable sermon, taking as the words of my text, "Howl,
+ye ships of Tarshish, for your strength is laid waste." But when I
+saw around me so many of my people clad in complimentary mourning
+for the gallant Charles Malcolm, and that even poor daft Jenny
+Gaffaw, and her daughter, had on an old black riband; and when I
+thought of him, the spirited laddie, coming home from Jamaica with
+his parrot on his shoulder, and his limes for me, my heart filled
+full, and I was obliged to sit down in the pulpit, and drop a tear.
+
+After a pause, and the Lord having vouchsafed to compose me, I rose
+up, and gave out that anthem of triumph, the 124th psalm, the
+singing of which brought the congregation round to themselves; but
+still I felt that I could not preach as I had meant to do; therefore
+I only said a few words of prayer, and singing another psalm,
+dismissed the congregation.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIV YEAR 1783
+
+
+
+This was another Sabbath year of my ministry. It has left me
+nothing to record but a silent increase of prosperity in the parish.
+I myself had now in the bank more than a thousand pounds, and every
+thing was thriving around. My two bairns, Gilbert, that is now the
+merchant in Glasgow, was grown into a sturdy ramplor laddie, and
+Janet, that is married upon Dr. Kittleword, the minister of
+Swappington, was as fine a lassie for her years as the eyes of a
+parent could desire to see.
+
+Shortly after the news of the peace, an event at which all gave
+themselves up to joy, a thing happened among us that at the time
+caused much talk; but although very dreadful, was yet not so
+serious, some how or other, as such an awsome doing should have
+been. Poor Jenny Gaffaw happened to take a heavy cold, and soon
+thereafter died. Meg went about from house to house, begging dead-
+clothes, and got the body straighted in a wonderful decent manner,
+with a plate of earth and salt placed upon it--an admonitory type of
+mortality and eternal life that has ill-advisedly gone out of
+fashion. When I heard of this, I could not but go to see how a
+creature that was not thought possessed of a grain of understanding,
+could have done so much herself. On entering the door, I beheld Meg
+sitting with two or three of the neighbouring kimmers, and the
+corpse laid out on a bed. "Come awa', sir," said Meg; "this is an
+altered house. They're gane that keepit it bein; but, sir, we maun
+a' come to this--we maun pay the debt o' nature--death is a grim
+creditor, and a doctor but brittle bail when the hour of reckoning's
+at han'! What a pity it is, mother, that you're now dead, for
+here's the minister come to see you. Oh, sir! but she would have
+had a proud heart to see you in her dwelling, for she had a genteel
+turn, and would not let me, her only daughter, mess or mell wi' the
+lathron lasses of the clachan. Ay, ay, she brought me up with care,
+and edicated me for a lady: nae coarse wark darkened my lily-white
+hands. But I maun work now; I maun dree the penalty of man."
+
+Having stopped some time, listening to the curious maunnering of
+Meg, I rose to come away; but she laid her hand on my arm, saying,
+"No, sir, ye maun taste before ye gang! My mother had aye plenty in
+her life, nor shall her latter day be needy."
+
+Accordingly, Meg, with all the due formality common on such
+occasions, produced a bottle of water, and a dram-glass, which she
+filled and tasted, then presented to me, at the same time offering
+me a bit of bread on a slate. It was a consternation to everybody
+how the daft creature had learnt all the ceremonies, which she
+performed in a manner past the power of pen to describe, making the
+solemnity of death, by her strange mockery, a kind of merriment,
+that was more painful than sorrow; but some spirits are gifted with
+a faculty of observation, that, by the strength of a little fancy,
+enables them to make a wonderful and truthlike semblance of things
+and events, which they never saw, and poor Meg seemed to have this
+gift.
+
+The same night, the session having provided a coffin, the body was
+put in, and removed to Mr Mutchkin's brewhouse, where the lads and
+lassies kept the late-wake.
+
+Saving this, the year flowed in a calm, and we floated on in the
+stream of time towards the great ocean of eternity, like ducks and
+geese in the river's tide, that are carried down without being
+sensible of the speed of the current. Alas! we have not wings like
+them, to fly back to the place we set out from.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXV YEAR 1784
+
+
+
+I have ever thought that this was a bright year, truly an Ann. Dom.,
+for in it many of the lads came home that had listed to be soldiers;
+and Mr Howard, that was the midshipman, being now a captain of a
+man-of-war, came down from England and married Effie Malcolm, and
+took her up with him to London, where she wrote to her mother, that
+she found his family people of great note, and more kind to her than
+she could write. By this time, also, Major Macadam was made a
+colonel, and lived with his lady in Edinburgh, where they were much
+respected by the genteeler classes, Mrs Macadam being considered a
+great unco among them for all manner of ladylike ornaments, she
+having been taught every sort of perfection in that way by the old
+lady, who was educated at the court of France, and was, from her
+birth, a person of quality. In this year, also, Captain Malcolm,
+her brother, married a daughter of a Glasgow merchant, so that Mrs
+Malcolm, in her declining years, had the prospect of a bright
+setting; but nothing could change the sober Christianity of her
+settled mind; and although she was strongly invited, both by the
+Macadams and the Howards, to see their felicity, she ever declined
+the same, saying--"No! I have been long out of the world, or
+rather, I have never been in it; my ways are not as theirs; and
+although I ken their hearts would be glad to be kind to me, I might
+fash their servants, or their friends might think me unlike other
+folk, by which, instead of causing pleasure, mortification might
+ensue; so I will remain in my own house, trusting that, when they
+can spare the time, they will come and see me."
+
+There was a spirit of true wisdom in this resolution, for it
+required a forbearance that in weaker minds would have relaxed; but
+though a person of a most slender and delicate frame of body, she
+was a Judith in fortitude; and in all the fortune that seemed now
+smiling upon her, she never was lifted up, but bore always that pale
+and meek look, which gave a saintliness to her endeavours in the
+days of her suffering and poverty.
+
+But when we enjoy most, we have least to tell. I look back on this
+year as on a sunny spot in the valley, amidst the shadows of the
+clouds of time; and I have nothing to record, save the remembrance
+of welcomings and weddings, and a meeting of bairns and parents,
+that the wars and the waters had long raged between. Contentment
+within the bosom, lent a livelier grace to the countenance of
+Nature; and everybody said, that in this year the hedges were
+greener than common, the gowans brighter on the brae, and the heads
+of the statelier trees adorned with a richer coronal of leaves and
+blossoms. All things were animated with the gladness of
+thankfulness, and testified to the goodness of their Maker.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVI YEAR 1785
+
+
+
+Well may we say, in the pious words of my old friend and neighbour,
+the Reverend Mr Keekie of Loupinton, that the world is such a wheel-
+carriage, that it might very properly be called the WHIRL'D. This
+reflection was brought home to me in a very striking manner, while I
+was preparing a discourse for my people, to be preached on the
+anniversary day of my placing, in which I took a view of what had
+passed in the parish during the five-and-twenty years that I had
+been, by the grace of God, the pastor thereof. The bairns, that
+were bairns when I came among my people, were ripened unto parents,
+and a new generation was swelling in the bud around me. But it is
+what happened that I have to give an account of.
+
+This year the Lady Macadam's jointure-house that was, having been
+long without a tenant, a Mr Cayenne and his family, American
+loyalists, came and took it, and settled among us for a time. His
+wife was a clever woman, and they had two daughters, Miss Virginia
+and Miss Carolina; but he was himself an ettercap, a perfect spunkie
+of passion, as ever was known in town or country. His wife had a
+terrible time o't with him, and yet the unhappy man had a great
+share of common sense, and, saving the exploits of his unmanageable
+temper, was an honest and creditable gentleman. Of his humour we
+soon had a sample, as I shall relate at length all about it.
+
+Shortly after he came to the parish, Mrs Balwhidder and me waited
+upon the family to pay our respects, and Mr Cayenne, in a free and
+hearty manner, insisted on us staying to dinner. His wife, I could
+see, was not satisfied with this, not being, as I discerned
+afterwards, prepared to give an entertainment to strangers; however,
+we fell into the misfortune of staying, and nothing could exceed the
+happiness of Mr Cayenne. I thought him one of the blithest bodies I
+had ever seen, and had no notion that he was such a tap of tow as in
+the sequel he proved himself.
+
+As there was something extra to prepare, the dinner was a little
+longer of being on the table than usual, at which he began to fash,
+and every now and then took a turn up and down the room, with his
+hands behind his back, giving a short melancholious whistle. At
+length the dinner was served, but it was more scanty than he had
+expected, and this upset his good-humour altogether. Scarcely had I
+asked the blessing when he began to storm at his blackamoor servant,
+who was, however, used to his way, and did his work without minding
+him; but by some neglect there was no mustard down, which Mr Cayenne
+called for in the voice of a tempest, and one of the servant lassies
+came in with the pot, trembling. It happened that, as it had not
+been used for a day or two before, the lid was clagged, and, as it
+were, glued in, so that Mr Cayenne could not get it out, which put
+him quite wud, and he attempted to fling it at Sambo, the black
+lad's head, but it stottit against the wall, and the lid flying
+open, the whole mustard flew in his own face, which made him a sight
+not to be spoken of. However it calmed him; but really, as I had
+never seen such a man before, I could not but consider the accident
+as a providential reproof, and trembled to think what greater evil
+might fall out in the hands of a man so left to himself in the
+intemperance of passion.
+
+But the worst thing about Mr Cayenne was his meddling with matters
+in which he had no concern; for he had a most irksome nature, and
+could not be at rest, so that he was truly a thorn in our side.
+Among other of his strange doings, was the part he took in the
+proceedings of the session, with which he had as little to do, in a
+manner, as the man in the moon; but having no business on his hands,
+he attended every sederunt, and from less to more, having no self-
+government, he began to give his opinion in our deliberations; and
+often bred us trouble, by causing strife to arise.
+
+It happened, as the time of the summer occasion was drawing near,
+that it behoved us to make arrangements about the assistance; and
+upon the suggestion of the elders, to which I paid always the
+greatest deference, I invited Mr Keekie of Loupinton, who was a
+sound preacher, and a great expounder of the kittle parts of the Old
+Testament, being a man well versed in the Hebrew and etymologies,
+for which he was much reverenced by the old people that delighted to
+search the Scriptures. I had also written to Mr Sprose of Annock, a
+preacher of another sort, being a vehement and powerful thresher of
+the word, making the chaff and vain babbling of corrupt commentators
+to fly from his hand. He was not, however, so well liked, as he
+wanted that connect method which is needful to the enforcing of
+doctrine. But he had never been among us, and it was thought it
+would be a godly treat to the parish to let the people hear him.
+Besides Mr Sprose, Mr Waikle of Gowanry, a quiet hewer out of the
+image of holiness in the heart, was likewise invited, all in
+addition to our old stoops from the adjacent parishes.
+
+None of these three preachers were in any estimation with Mr
+Cayenne, who had only heard each of them once; and he, happening to
+be present in the session-house at the time, enquired how we had
+settled. I thought this not a very orderly question, but I gave him
+a civil answer, saying, that, Mr Keekie of Loupinton would preach on
+the morning of the fast-day, Mr Sprose of Annock in the afternoon,
+and Mr Waikle of Gowanry on the Saturday. Never shall I or the
+elders, while the breath of life is in our bodies, forget the reply.
+Mr Cayenne struck the table like a clap of thunder, and cried, "Mr
+Keekie of Loupinton, and Mr Sprose of Annock, and Mr Waikle of
+Gowanry, and all suck trash, may go to--and be -!" and out of the
+house he bounced, like a hand-ball stotting on a stone.
+
+The elders and me were confounded, and for some time we could not
+speak, but looked at each other, doubtful if our ears heard aright.
+At long and length I came to myself; and, in the strength of God,
+took my place at the table, and said, this was an outrageous impiety
+not to be borne, which all the elders agreed to; and we thereupon
+came to a resolve, which I dictated myself, wherein we debarred Mr
+Cayenne from ever after entering, unless summoned, the session-
+house, the which resolve we directed the session-clerk to send to
+him direct, and thus we vindicated the insulted privileges of the
+church.
+
+Mr Cayenne had cooled before he got home, and our paper coming to
+him in his appeased blood, he immediately came to the manse, and
+made a contrite apology for his hasty temper, which I reported in
+due time and form, to the session, and there the matter ended. But
+here was an example plain to be seen of the truth of the old
+proverb, that as one door shuts another opens; for scarcely were we
+in quietness by the decease of that old light-headed woman, the Lady
+Macadam, till a full equivalent for her was given in this hot and
+fiery Mr Cayenne.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVII YEAR 1786
+
+
+
+From the day of my settlement, I had resolved, in order to win the
+affections of my people, and to promote unison among the heritors,
+to be of as little expense to the parish as possible; but by this
+time the manse had fallen into a sore state of decay--the doors were
+wormed on the hinges--the casements of the windows chattered all the
+winter, like the teeth of a person perishing with cold, so that we
+had no comfort in the house; by which, at the urgent instigations of
+Mrs Balwhidder, I was obligated to represent our situation to the
+session. I would rather, having so much saved money in the bank,
+paid the needful repairs myself, than have done this, but she said
+it would be a rank injustice to our own family; and her father, Mr
+Kibbock, who was very long-headed, with more than a common man's
+portion of understanding, pointed out to me, that, as my life was
+but in my lip, it would be a wrong thing towards whomsoever was
+ordained to be my successor, to use the heritors to the custom of
+the minister paying for the reparations of the manse, as it might
+happen he might not be so well able to afford it as me. So in a
+manner, by their persuasion, and the constraint of the justice of
+the case, I made a report of the infirmities both of doors and
+windows, as well as of the rotten state of the floors, which were
+constantly in want of cobbling. Over and above all, I told them of
+the sarking of the roof, which was as frush as a puddock-stool;
+insomuch, that in every blast some of the pins lost their grip, and
+the slates came hurling off.
+
+The heritors were accordingly convened, and, after some
+deliberation, they proposed that the house should be seen to, and
+whitewashed and painted; and I thought this might do, for I saw they
+were terrified at the expense of a thorough repair; but when I went
+home and repeated to Mrs Balwhidder what had been said at the
+meeting, and my thankfulness at getting the heritors' consent to do
+so much, she was excessively angry, and told me, that all the
+painting and whitewashing in the world would avail nothing, for that
+the house was as a sepulchre full of rottenness; and she sent for Mr
+Kibbock, her father, to confer with him on the way of getting the
+matter put to rights.
+
+Mr Kibbock came, and hearing of what had passed, pondered for some
+time, and then said, "All was very right! the minister (meaning me)
+has just to get tradesmen to look at the house, and write out their
+opinion of what it needs. There will be plaster to mend; so, before
+painting, he will get a plasterer. There will be a slater wanted;
+he has just to get a slater's estimate, and a wright's, and so
+forth, and when all is done, he will lay them before the session and
+the heritors, who, no doubt, will direct the reparations to go
+forward."
+
+This was very pawkie, counselling, of Mr Kibbock, and I did not see
+through it at the time, but did as he recommended, and took all the
+different estimates, when they came in, to the session. The elders
+commended my prudence exceedingly for so doing, before going to
+work; and one of them asked me what the amount of the whole would
+be, but I had not cast it up. Some of the heritors thought that a
+hundred pounds would be sufficient for the outlay; but judge of our
+consternation, when, in counting up all the sums of the different
+estimates together, we found them well on towards a thousand pounds.
+"Better big a new house at once, than do this!" cried all the
+elders, by which I then perceived the draughtiness of Mr Kibbock's
+advice. Accordingly, another meeting of the heritors was summoned,
+and after a great deal of controversy, it was agreed that a new
+manse should be erected; and, shortly after, we contracted with
+Thomas Trowel, the mason to build one for six hundred pounds, with
+all the requisite appurtenances, by which a clear gain was saved to
+the parish, by the foresight of Mr Kibbock, to the amount of nearly
+four hundred pounds. But the heritors did not mean to have allowed
+the sort of repair that his plan comprehended. He was, however, a
+far forecasting man; the like of him for natural parts not being in
+our country side; and nobody could get the whip-hand of him, either
+in a bargain or an improvement, when he once was sensible of the
+advantage. He was, indeed, a blessing to the shire, both by his
+example as a farmer, and by his sound and discreet advice in the
+contentions of his neighbours, being a man, as was a saying among
+the commonality, "wiser than the law and the fifteen Lords of
+Edinburgh."
+
+The building of the new manse occasioned a heavy cess on the
+heritors, which made them overly ready to pick holes in the coats of
+me and the elders; so that, out of my forbearance and delicacy in
+time past, grew a lordliness on their part, that was an ill return
+for the years that I had endured no little inconveniency for their
+sake. It was not in my heart or principles to harm the hair of a
+dog; but when I discerned the austerity with which they were
+disposed to treat their minister, I bethought me that, for the
+preservation of what was due to the establishment and the upholding
+of the decent administration of religion, I ought to set my face
+against the sordid intolerance by which they were actuated. This
+notion I weighed well before divulging it to any person; but when I
+had assured myself as to the rectitude thereof, I rode over one day
+to Mr Kibbock's, and broke my mind to him about claiming out of the
+teinds an augmentation of my stipend, not because I needed it, but
+in case, after me, some bare and hungry gorbie of the Lord should be
+sent upon the parish, in no such condition to plea with the heritors
+as I was. Mr Kibbock highly approved of my intent; and by his help,
+after much tribulation, I got an augmentation both in glebe and
+income; and to mark my reason for what I did, I took upon me to keep
+and clothe the wives and orphans of the parish, who lost their
+breadwinners in the American war. But for all that, the heritors
+spoke of me as an avaricious Jew, and made the hard-won fruits of
+Mrs Balwhidder's great thrift and good management a matter of
+reproach against me. Few of them would come to the church, but
+stayed away, to the detriment of their own souls hereafter, in
+order, as they thought, to punish me; so that, in the course of this
+year, there was a visible decay of the sense of religion among the
+better orders of the parish, and, as will be seen in the sequel,
+their evil example infected the minds of many of the rising
+generation.
+
+It was in this year that Mr Cayenne bought the mailing of the
+Wheatrigs, but did not begin to build his house till the following
+spring; for being ill to please with a plan, he fell out with the
+builders, and on one occasion got into such a passion with Mr
+Trowel, the mason, that he struck him a blow on the face, for which
+he was obligated to make atonement. It was thought the matter would
+have been carried before the Lords; but, by the mediation of Mr
+Kibbock, with my helping hand, a reconciliation was brought about,
+Mr Cayenne indemnifying the mason with a sum of money to say no more
+anent it; after which, he employed him to build his house, a thing
+that no man could have thought possible, who reflected on the enmity
+between them.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVIII YEAR 1787
+
+
+
+There had been, as I have frequently observed, a visible improvement
+going on in the parish. From the time of the making of the toll-
+road, every new house that was built in the clachan was built along
+that road. Among other changes hereby caused, the Lady Macadam's
+jointure-house that was, which stood in a pleasant parterre,
+inclosed within a stone wall and an iron gate, having a pillar with
+a pineapple head on each side, came to be in the middle of the town.
+While Mr Cayenne inhabited the same, it was maintained in good
+order; but on his flitting to his own new house on the Wheatrigs,
+the parterre was soon overrun with weeds, and it began to wear the
+look of a waste place. Robert Toddy, who then kept the change-
+house, and who had, from the lady's death, rented the coach-house
+for stabling, in this juncture thought of it for an inn; so he set
+his own house to Thomas Treddles the weaver, whose son, William, is
+now the great Glasgow manufacturer, that has cotton-mills and steam-
+engines, and took, "the Place," as it was called, and had a fine
+sign, THE CROSS-KEYS, painted and put up in golden characters, by
+which it became one of the most noted inns anywhere to be seen; and
+the civility of Mrs Toddy was commended by all strangers. But
+although this transmutation from a change-house to an inn was a vast
+amendment, in a manner, to the parish, there was little amendment of
+manners thereby; for the farmer lads began to hold dancings and
+other riotous proceedings there, and to bring, as it were, the evil
+practices of towns into the heart of the country. All sort of
+licence was allowed as to drink and hours; and the edifying example
+of Mr Mutchkins and his pious family, was no longer held up to the
+imitation of the wayfaring man.
+
+Saving the mutation of "the Place" into an inn, nothing very
+remarkable happened in this year. We got into our new manse about
+the middle of March; but it was rather damp, being new plastered,
+and it caused me to have a severe attack of the rheumatics in the
+fall of the year.
+
+I should not, in my notations, forget to mark a new luxury that got
+in among the commonality at this time. By the opening of new roads,
+and the traffic thereon with carts and carriers, and by our young
+men that were sailors going to the Clyde, and sailing to Jamaica and
+the West Indies, heaps of sugar and coffee-beans were brought home,
+while many, among the kail-stocks and cabbages in their yards, had
+planted groset and berry bushes; which two things happening
+together, the fashion to make jam and jelly, which hitherto had been
+only known in the kitchens and confectionaries of the gentry, came
+to be introduced into the clachan. All this, however, was not
+without a plausible pretext; for it was found that jelly was an
+excellent medicine for a sore throat, and jam a remedy as good as
+London candy for a cough, or a cold, or a shortness of breath. I
+could not, however, say that this gave me so much concern as the
+smuggling trade, only it occasioned a great fasherie to Mrs
+Balwhidder; for, in the berry time, there was no end to the
+borrowing of her brass-pan to make jelly and jam, till Mrs Toddy of
+the Cross-Keys bought one, which, in its turn, came into request,
+and saved ours.
+
+It was in the Martinmas quarter of this year that I got the first
+payment of my augmentation. Having no desire to rip up old sores, I
+shall say no more anent it, the worst being anticipated in my
+chronicle of the last year; but there was a thing happened in the
+payment that occasioned a vexation at the time, of a very
+disagreeable nature. Daft Meg Gaffaw, who, from the tragical death
+of her mother, was a privileged subject, used to come to the manse
+on the Saturdays for a meal of meat; and so it fell out that as, by
+some neglect of mine, no steps had been taken to regulate the
+disposal of the victual that constituted the means of the
+augmentation, some of the heritors, in an ungracious temper, sent
+what they called the tithe-ball (the Lord knows it was not the
+fiftieth!) to the manse, where I had no place to put it. This fell
+out on a Saturday night, when I was busy with my sermon, thinking
+not of silver or gold, but of much better; so that I was greatly
+molested and disturbed thereby. Daft Meg, who sat by the kitchen
+chimley-lug, hearing a', said nothing for a time; but when she saw
+how Mrs Balwhidder and me were put to, she cried out with a loud
+voice, like a soul under the inspiration of prophecy--"When the
+widow's cruse had filled all the vessels in the house, the Lord
+stopped the increase. Verily, verily, I say unto you, if your barns
+be filled, and your girnell-kists can hold no more, seek till ye
+shall find the tume basins of the poor, and therein pour the corn,
+and the oil, and the wine of your abundance; so shall ye be blessed
+of the Lord." The which words I took for an admonition, and
+directing the sacks to be brought into the dining-room and other
+chambers of the manse, I sent off the heritors' servants, that had
+done me this prejudice, with an unexpected thankfulness. But this,
+as I afterwards was informed, both them and their masters attributed
+to the greedy grasp of avarice, with which they considered me as
+misled; and having said so, nothing could exceed their mortification
+on Monday, when they heard (for they were of those who had deserted
+the kirk) that I had given by the precentor notice to every widow in
+the parish that was in need, to come to the manse and she would
+receive her portion of the partitioning of the augmentation. Thus,
+without any offence on my part, saving the strictness of justice,
+was a division made between me and the heritors; but the people were
+with me; and my own conscience was with me; and though the fronts of
+the lofts and the pews of the heritors were but thinly filled, I
+trusted that a good time was coming, when the gentry would see the
+error of their way. So I bent the head of resignation to the Lord,
+and, assisted by the wisdom of Mr Kibbock, adhered to the course I
+had adopted; but at the close of the year my heart was sorrowful for
+the schism; and my prayer on Hogmanay was one of great bitterness of
+soul, that such an evil had come to pass.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIX YEAR 1788
+
+
+
+It had been often remarked by ingenious men, that the Brawl burn,
+which ran through the parish, though a small, was yet a rapid
+stream, and had a wonderful capability for damming, and to turn
+mills. From the time that the Irville water deserted its channel
+this brook grew into repute, and several mills and dams had been
+erected on its course. In this year a proposal came from Glasgow to
+build a cotton-mill on its banks, beneath the Witch-linn, which
+being on a corner of the Wheatrig, the property of Mr Cayenne, he
+not only consented thereto, but took a part in the profit or loss
+therein; and, being a man of great activity, though we thought him,
+for many a day, a serpent-plague sent upon the parish, he proved
+thereby one of our greatest benefactors. The cotton-mill was built,
+and a spacious fabric it was--nothing like it had been seen before
+in our day and generation--and, for the people that were brought to
+work in it, a new town was built in the vicinity, which Mr Cayenne,
+the same being founded on his land, called Cayenneville, the name of
+the plantation in Virginia that had been taken from him by the
+rebellious Americans. From that day Fortune was lavish of her
+favours upon him; his property swelled, and grew in the most
+extraordinary manner, and the whole country side was stirring with a
+new life. For, when the mill was set a-going, he got weavers of
+muslin established in Cayenneville; and shortly after, but that did
+not take place till the year following, he brought women all the way
+from the neighbourhood of Manchester, in England, to teach the
+lassie bairns in our old clachan tambouring.
+
+Some of the ancient families, in their turreted houses, were not
+pleased with this innovation, especially when they saw the handsome
+dwellings that were built for the weavers of the mills, and the
+unstinted hand that supplied the wealth required for the carrying on
+of the business. It sank their pride into insignificance, and many
+of them would almost rather have wanted the rise that took place in
+the value of their lands, than have seen this incoming of what they
+called o'er-sea speculation. But, saving the building of the
+cotton-mill, and the beginning of Cayenneville, nothing more
+memorable happened in this year, still it was nevertheless a year of
+a great activity. The minds of men were excited to new enterprises;
+a new genius, as it were, had descended upon the earth, and there
+was an erect and outlooking spirit abroad that was not to be
+satisfied with the taciturn regularity of ancient affairs. Even
+Miss Sabrina Hooky, the schoolmistress, though now waned from her
+meridian, was touched with the enlivening rod, and set herself to
+learn and to teach tambouring, in such a manner as to supersede by
+precept and example that old time-honoured functionary, as she
+herself called it, the spinning-wheel, proving, as she did one night
+to Mr Kibbock and me, that, if more money could be made by a woman
+tambouring than by spinning, it was better for her to tambour than
+to spin.
+
+But, in the midst of all this commercing and manufacturing, I began
+to discover signs of decay in the wonted simplicity of our country
+ways. Among the cotton-spinners and muslin weavers of Cayenneville
+were several unsatisfied and ambitious spirits, who clubbed
+together, and got a London newspaper to the Cross-Keys, where they
+were nightly in the habit of meeting and debating about the affairs
+of the French, which were then gathering towards a head. They were
+represented to me as lads by common in capacity, but with unsettled
+notions of religion. They were, however, quiet and orderly; and
+some of them since, at Glasgow, Paisley, and Manchester, even, I am
+told, in London, have grown into a topping way.
+
+It seems they did not like my manner of preaching, and on that
+account absented themselves from public worship; which, when I
+heard, I sent for some of them, to convince them of their error with
+regard to the truth of divers points of doctrine; but they
+confounded me with their objections, and used my arguments, which
+were the old and orthodox proven opinions of the Divinity Hall, as
+if they had been the light sayings of a vain man. So that I was
+troubled, fearing that some change would ensue to my people, who had
+hitherto lived amidst the boughs and branches of the gospel
+unmolested by the fowler's snare, and I set myself to watch
+narrowly, and with a vigilant eye, what would come to pass.
+
+There was a visible increase among us of worldly prosperity in the
+course of this year; insomuch that some of the farmers, who were in
+the custom of taking their vendibles to the neighbouring towns on
+the Tuesdays, the Wednesdays, and Fridays, were led to open a market
+on the Saturdays in our own clachan, the which proved a great
+convenience. But I cannot take it upon me to say, whether this can
+be said to have well begun in the present Ann. Dom., although I know
+that in the summer of the ensuing year it was grown into a settled
+custom; which I well recollect by the Macadams coming with their
+bairns to see Mrs Malcolm, their mother, suddenly on a Saturday
+afternoon; on which occasion me and Mrs Balwhidder were invited to
+dine with them, and Mrs Malcolm bought in the market for the dinner
+that day, both mutton and fowls, such as twenty years before could
+not have been got for love or money on such a pinch. Besides, she
+had two bottles of red and white wine from the Cross-Keys, luxuries
+which, saving in the Breadland House in its best days, could not
+have been had in the whole parish, but must have been brought from a
+borough town; for Eaglesham Castle is not within the bounds of
+Dalmailing, and my observe does not apply to the stock and stores of
+that honourable mansion, but only to the dwellings of our own
+heritors, who were in general straitened in their circumstances,
+partly with upsetting, and partly by the eating rust of family
+pride, which hurt the edge of many a clever fellow among them, that
+would have done well in the way of trade, but sunk into divors for
+the sake of their genteelity.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXX YEAR 1789
+
+
+
+This I have always reflected upon as one of our blessed years. It
+was not remarkable for any extraordinary occurrence; but there was a
+hopefulness in the minds of men, and a planning of new undertakings,
+of which, whatever may be the upshot, the devising is ever rich in
+the cheerful anticipations of good.
+
+Another new line of road was planned, for a shorter cut to the
+cotton-mill, from the main road to Glasgow, and a public-house was
+opened in Cayenneville: the latter, however, was not an event that
+gave me much satisfaction; but it was a convenience to the
+inhabitants, and the carriers that brought the cotton-bags and took
+away the yarn twice a-week, needed a place of refreshment. And
+there was a stage-coach set up thrice every week from Ayr, that
+passed through the town, by which it was possible to travel to
+Glasgow between breakfast and dinner time, a thing that could not,
+when I came to the parish, have been thought within the compass of
+man.
+
+This stage-coach I thought one of the greatest conveniences that had
+been established among us; and it enabled Mrs Balwhidder to send a
+basket of her fresh butter into the Glasgow market, by which, in the
+spring and the fall of the year, she got a great price; for the
+Glasgow merchants are fond of excellent eatables, and the payment
+was aye ready money--Tam Whirlit the driver paying for the one
+basket when he took up the other.
+
+In this year William Malcolm, the youngest son of the widow, having
+been some time a tutor in a family in the east country, came to see
+his mother, as indeed he had done every year from the time he went
+to the college; but this occasion was made remarkable by his
+preaching in my pulpit. His old acquaintance were curious to hear
+him; and I myself had a sort of a wish likewise, being desirous to
+know how far he was orthodox; so I thought fit, on the suggestion of
+one of the elders, to ask him to preach one day for me, which, after
+some fleeching, he consented to do. I think, however, there was a
+true modesty in his diffidence, although his reason was a weak one,
+being lest he might not satisfy his mother, who had as yet never
+heard him. Accordingly, on the Sabbath after, he did preach, and
+the kirk was well packed, and I was not one of the least attentive
+of the congregation. His sermon assuredly was well put together and
+there was nothing to object to in his doctrine; but the elderly
+people thought his language rather too Englified, which I thought
+likewise; for I never could abide that the plain auld Kirk of
+Scotland, with her sober presbyterian simplicity, should borrow,
+either in word or in deed, from the language of the prelatic
+hierarchy of England. Nevertheless, the younger part of the
+congregation were loud in his praise, saying, there had not been
+heard before such a style of language in our side of the country.
+As for Mrs Malcolm, his mother, when I spoke to her anent the same,
+she said but little, expressing only her hope that his example would
+be worthy of his precepts; so that, upon the whole, it was a
+satisfaction to us all, that he was likely to prove a stoop and
+upholding pillar to the Kirk of Scotland. And his mother had the
+satisfaction, before she died, to see him a placed minister, and his
+name among the authors of his country; for he published at Edinburgh
+a volume of Moral Essays, of which he sent me a pretty bound copy,
+and they were greatly creditable to his pen, though lacking somewhat
+of that birr and smeddum that is the juice and flavour of books of
+that sort.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXI YEAR 1790
+
+
+
+The features of this Ann. Dom. partook of the character of its
+predecessor. Several new houses were added to the clachan;
+Cayenneville was spreading out with weavers' shops, and growing up
+fast into a town. In some respects it got the start of ours; for
+one day, when I was going to dine with Mr Cayenne at Wheatrig House,
+not a little to my amazement, did I behold a bookseller's shop
+opened there, with sticks of red and black wax, pouncet-boxes, pens,
+pocket-books, and new publications, in the window, such as the like
+of was only to be seen in cities and borough towns. And it was
+lighted at night by a patent lamp, which shed a wonderful beam,
+burning oil, and having no smoke. The man sold likewise perfumery,
+powder-puffs, trinkets, and Dublin dolls, besides penknives, Castile
+soap, and walking-sticks, together with a prodigy of other luxuries
+too tedious to mention.
+
+Upon conversing with the man, for I was enchanted to go into this
+phenomenon, for as no less could I regard it, he told me that he had
+a correspondence with London, and could get me down any book
+published there within the same month in which it came out; and he
+showed me divers of the newest come out, of which I did not read
+even in the Scots Magazine till more than three months after,
+although I had till then always considered that work as most
+interesting for its early intelligence. But what I was most
+surprised to hear, was, that he took in a daily London newspaper for
+the spinners and weavers, who paid him a penny a-week a-piece for
+the same; they being all greatly taken up with what, at the time,
+was going on in France.
+
+This bookseller in the end, however, proved a whawp in our nest, for
+he was in league with some of the English reformers; and when the
+story took wind three years after, concerning the plots and treasons
+of the corresponding societies and democrats, he was fain to make a
+moonlight flitting, leaving his wife for a time to manage his
+affairs. I could not, however, think any ill of the man
+notwithstanding; for he had very correct notions of right and
+justice, in a political sense, and when he came into the parish he
+was as orderly and well-behaved as any other body; and conduct is a
+test that I have always found as good for a man's principles as
+professions. Nor, at the time of which I am speaking, was there any
+of that dread or fear of reforming the government that has since
+been occasioned by the wild and wasteful hand which the French
+employed in their revolution.
+
+But, among other improvements, I should mention that a Doctor
+Marigold came and settled in Cayenneville, a small, round, happy-
+tempered man, whose funny stories were far better liked than his
+drugs. There was a doubt among some of the weavers if he was a
+skilful Esculapian; and this doubt led to their holding out an
+inducement to another medical man, Dr. Tanzey, to settle there
+likewise, by which it grew into a saying, that at Cayenneville there
+was a doctor for health as well as sickness; for Dr. Marigold was
+one of the best hands in the country at a pleasant punch-bowl, while
+Dr. Tanzey had all the requisite knowledge for the faculty for the
+bedside.
+
+It was in this year that the hour-plate and hand on the kirk steeple
+were renewed, as indeed, may yet be seen by the date, though it be
+again greatly in want of fresh gilding; for it was by my advice that
+the figures of the Ann. Dom. were placed one in each corner. In
+this year, likewise, the bridge over the Brawl burn was built--a
+great convenience, in the winter time, to the parishioners that
+lived on the north side; for when there happened to be a spait on
+the Sunday, it kept them from the kirk; but I did not find that the
+bridge mended the matter, till after the conclusion of the war
+against the democrats, and the beginning of that which we are now
+waging with Boney, their child and champion. It is, indeed,
+wonderful to think of the occultation of grace that was taking place
+about this time, throughout the whole bound of Christendom; for I
+could mark a visible darkness of infidelity spreading in the corner
+of the vineyard committed to my keeping, and a falling away of the
+vines from their wonted props and confidence in the truths of
+Revelation. But I said nothing. I knew that the faith could not be
+lost, and that it would be found purer and purer the more it was
+tried; and this I have lived to see, many now being zealous members
+of the church, that were abundantly lukewarm at the period of which
+I am now speaking.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXII YEAR 1791
+
+
+
+In the spring of this year, I took my son Gilbert into Glasgow, to
+place him in a counting-house. As he had no inclination for any of
+the learned professions, and not having been there from the time
+when I was sent to the General Assembly, I cannot express my
+astonishment at the great improvements, surpassing far all that was
+done in our part of the country, which I thought was not to be
+paralleled. When I came afterwards to reflect on my simplicity in
+this, it was clear to me that we should not judge of the rest of the
+world by what we see going on around ourselves, but walk abroad into
+other parts, and thereby enlarge our sphere of observation, as well
+as ripen our judgment of things.
+
+But although there was no doubt a great and visible increase of the
+city, loftier buildings on all sides, and streets that spread their
+arms far into the embraces of the country, I thought the looks of
+the population were impaired, and that there was a greater
+proportion of long white faces in the Trongate, than when I attended
+the Divinity class. These, I was told, were the weavers and others
+concerned in the cotton trade, which I could well believe, for they
+were very like in their looks to the men of Cayenneville; but from
+living in a crowded town, and not breathing a wholesome country air
+between their tasks, they had a stronger cast of unhealthy
+melancholy. I was therefore very glad that Providence had placed in
+my hand the pastoral staff of a country parish; for it cut me to the
+heart to see so many young men, in the rising prime of life, already
+in the arms of a pale consumption. "If, therefore," said I to Mrs
+Balwhidder, when I returned home to the manse, "we live, as it were,
+within the narrow circle of ignorance, we are spared from the pain
+of knowing many an evil; and, surely, in much knowledge there is
+sadness of heart."
+
+But the main effect of this was to make me do all in my power to
+keep my people contented with their lowly estate; for in that same
+spirit of improvement, which was so busy every where, I could
+discern something like a shadow, that showed it was not altogether
+of that pure advantage which avarice led all so eagerly to believe.
+Accordingly, I began a series of sermons on the evil and vanity of
+riches, and, for the most part of the year, pointed out in what
+manner they led the possessor to indulge in sinful luxuries, and how
+indulgence begat desire, and desire betrayed integrity and corrupted
+the heart; making it evident that the rich man was liable to forget
+his unmerited obligations to God, and to oppress the laborious and
+the needful when he required their services.
+
+Little did I imagine, in thus striving to keep aloof the ravenous
+wolf Ambition from my guileless flock, that I was giving cause for
+many to think me an enemy to the king and government, and a
+perverter of Christianity, to suit levelling doctrines. But so it
+was. Many of the heritors considered me a blackneb, though I knew
+it not, but went on in the course of my duty, thinking only how best
+to preserve peace on earth and goodwill towards men. I saw,
+however, an altered manner in the deportment of several, with whom I
+had long lived in friendly terms. It was not marked enough to make
+me inquire the cause, but sufficiently plain to affect my ease of
+mind. Accordingly, about the end of this year, I fell into a dull
+way: my spirit was subdued, and at times I was aweary of the day,
+and longed for the night, when I might close my eyes in peaceful
+slumbers. I missed my son Gilbert, who had been a companion to me
+in the long nights, while his mother was busy with the lasses, and
+their ceaseless wheels and cardings, in the kitchen. Often could I
+have found it in my heart to have banned that never-ceasing
+industry, and to tell Mrs Balwhidder, that the married state was
+made for something else than to make napery and beetle blankets; but
+it was her happiness to keep all at work, and she had no pleasure in
+any other way of life, so I sat many a night by the fireside with
+resignation; sometimes in the study, and sometimes in the parlour,
+and, as I was doing nothing, Mrs Balwhidder said it was needless to
+light the candle. Our daughter Janet was in this time at a
+boarding-school in Ayr, so that I was really a most solitary married
+man.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIII YEAR 1792
+
+
+
+When the spring in this year began to brighten on the brae, the
+cloud of dulness that had darkened and oppressed me all the winter
+somewhat melted away, and I could now and then joke again at the
+never-ending toil and trouble of that busiest of all bees, the
+second Mrs Balwhidder. But still I was far from being right: a
+small matter affected me, and I was overly given to walking by
+myself, and musing on things that I could tell nothing about--my
+thoughts were just the rack of a dream without form, and driving
+witlessly as the smoke that mounteth up, and is lost in the airy
+heights of the sky.
+
+Heeding little of what was going on in the clachan, and taking no
+interest in the concerns of any body, I would have been contented to
+die, but I had no ail about me. An accident, however, fell out,
+that, by calling on me for an effort, had the blessed influence of
+clearing my vapours almost entirely away.
+
+One morning as I was walking on the sunny side of the road, where
+the footpath was in the next year made to the cotton-mill, I fell in
+with Mr Cayenne, who was seemingly much fashed--a small matter could
+do that at any time; and he came up to me with a red face and an
+angry eye. It was not my intent to speak to him; for I was grown
+loth to enter into conversation with any body, so I bowed and passed
+on. "What," cried Mr Cayenne, "and will you not speak to me?" I
+turned round, and said meekly, "Mr Cayenne, I have no objections to
+speak to you; but having nothing particular to say, it did not seem
+necessary just now."
+
+He looked at me like a gled, and in a minute exclaimed, "Mad, by
+Jupiter! as mad as a March hare!" He then entered into conversation
+with me, and said, that he had noticed me an altered man, and was
+just so far on his way to the manse, to enquire what had befallen
+me. So, from less to more, we entered into the marrow of my case;
+and I told him how I had observed the estranged countenances of some
+of the heritors; at which he swore an oath, that they were a parcel
+of the damn'dest boobies in the country, and told me how they had
+taken it into their heads that I was a leveller. "But I know you
+better," said Mr Cayenne, "and have stood up for you as an honest
+conscientious man, though I don't much like your humdrum preaching.
+However, let that pass; I insist upon your dining with me to-day,
+when some of these arrant fools are to be with us, and the devil's
+in't if I don't make you friends with them." I did not think Mr
+Cayenne, however, very well qualified for peacemaker, but,
+nevertheless, I consented to go; and having thus got an inkling of
+the cause of that cold back-turning which had distressed me so much,
+I made such an effort to remove the error that was entertained
+against me, that some of the heritors, before we separated, shook me
+by the hands with the cordiality of renewed friendship; and, as if
+to make amends for past neglect, there was no end to their
+invitations to dinner which had the effect of putting me again on my
+mettle, and removing the thick and muddy melancholious humour out of
+my blood.
+
+But what confirmed my cure was the coming home of my daughter Janet
+from the Ayr boarding-school, where she had learnt to play on the
+spinnet, and was become a conversible lassie, with a competent
+knowledge, for a woman of geography and history; so that when her
+mother was busy with the weariful booming wheel, she entertained me
+sometimes with a tune, and sometimes with her tongue, which made the
+winter nights fly cantily by.
+
+Whether it was owing to the malady of my imagination throughout the
+greatest part of this year, or that really nothing particular did
+happen to interest me, I cannot say; but it is very remarkable that
+I have nothing remarkable to record--further, than I was at the
+expense myself of getting the manse rough-case, and the window
+cheeks painted, with roans put up, rather than apply to the
+heritors; for they were always sorely fashed when called upon for
+outlay.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIV YEAR 1793
+
+
+
+On the first night of this year I dreamt a very remarkable dream,
+which, when I now recall to mind at this distance of time, I cannot
+but think that there was a case of prophecy in it. I thought that I
+stood on the tower of an old popish kirk, looking out at the window
+upon the kirkyard, where I beheld ancient tombs, with effigies and
+coats-of-arms on the wall thereof, and a great gate at the one side,
+and a door that led into a dark and dismal vault at the other. I
+thought all the dead that were lying in the common graves, rose out
+of their coffins; at the same time, from the old and grand
+monuments, with the effigies and coats-of-arms, came the great men,
+and the kings of the earth with crowns on their heads, and globes
+and sceptres in their hands.
+
+I stood wondering what was to ensue, when presently I heard the
+noise of drums and trumpets, and anon I beheld an army with banners
+entering in at the gate; upon which the kings and the great men came
+also forth in their power and array, and a dreadful battle was
+foughten; but the multitude that had risen from the common graves,
+stood afar off, and were but lookers-on.
+
+The kings and their host were utterly discomfited. They were driven
+within the doors of their monuments, their coats-of-arms were broken
+off, and their effigies cast down, and the victors triumphed over
+them with the flourishes of trumpets and the waving of banners. But
+while I looked, the vision was changed, and I then beheld a wide and
+a dreary waste, and afar off the steeples of a great city, and a
+tower in the midst, like the tower of Babel, and on it I could
+discern, written in characters of fire, "Public Opinion." While I
+was pondering at the same, I heard a great shout, and presently the
+conquerors made their appearance, coming over the desolate moor.
+They were going in great pride and might towards the city; but an
+awful burning rose, afar as it were in the darkness, and the flames
+stood like a tower of fire that reached unto the heavens. And I saw
+a dreadful hand and an arm stretched from out of the cloud, and in
+its hold was a besom made of the hail and the storm, and it swept
+the fugitives like dust; and in their place I saw the churchyard, as
+it were, cleared and spread around, the graves closed, and the
+ancient tombs, with their coats-of-arms and their effigies of stone,
+all as they were in the beginning. I then awoke, and behold it was
+a dream.
+
+This vision perplexed me for many days, and when the news came that
+the King of France was beheaded by the hands of his people, I
+received, as it were, a token in confirmation of the vision that had
+been disclosed to me in my sleep, and I preached a discourse on the
+same, and against the French Revolution, that was thought one of the
+greatest and soundest sermons that I had ever delivered in my
+pulpit.
+
+On the Monday following, Mr Cayenne, who had been some time before
+appointed a justice of the peace, came over from Wheatrig House to
+the Cross-Keys, where he sent for me and divers other respectable
+inhabitants of the clachan, and told us that he was to have a sad
+business, for a warrant was out to bring before him two democratical
+weaver lads, on a suspicion of high treason. Scarcely were the
+words uttered when they were brought in, and he began to ask them
+how they dared to think of dividing, with their liberty and equality
+of principles, his and every other man's property in the country.
+The men answered him in a calm manner, and told him they sought no
+man's property, but only their own natural rights; upon which he
+called them traitors and reformers. They denied they were traitors,
+but confessed they were reformers, and said they knew not how that
+should be imputed to them as a fault, for that the greatest men of
+all times had been reformers,--"Was not," they said, "our Lord Jesus
+Christ a reformer?"--"And what the devil did he make of it?" cried
+Mr Cayenne, bursting with passion; "Was he not crucified?"
+
+I thought, when I heard these words, that the pillars of the earth
+sank beneath me, and that the roof of the house was carried away in
+a whirlwind. The drums of my ears crackit, blue starns danced
+before my sight, and I was fain to leave the house and hie me home
+to the manse, where I sat down in my study, like a stupified
+creature, awaiting what would betide. Nothing, however, was found
+against the weaver lads; but I never from that day could look on Mr
+Cayenne as a Christian, though surely he was a true government-man.
+
+Soon after this affair, there was a pleasant re-edification of a
+gospel-spirit among the heritors, especially when they heard how I
+had handled the regicides in France; and on the following Sunday, I
+had the comfortable satisfaction to see many a gentleman in their
+pews, that had not been for years within a kirk-door. The
+democrats, who took a world of trouble to misrepresent the actions
+of the gentry, insinuated that all this was not from any new sense
+of grace, but in fear of their being reported as suspected persons
+to the king's government. But I could not think so, and considered
+their renewal of communion with the church as a swearing of
+allegiance to the King of kings, against that host of French
+atheists, who had torn the mortcloth from the coffin, and made it a
+banner, with which they were gone forth to war against the Lamb.
+The whole year was, however, spent in great uneasiness, and the
+proclamation of the war was followed by an appalling stop in trade.
+We heard of nothing but failures on all hands; and among others that
+grieved me, was that of Mr Maitland of Glasgow, who had befriended
+Mrs Malcolm in the days of her affliction, and gave her son Robert
+his fine ship. It was a sore thing to hear of so many breakings,
+especially of old respected merchants like him, who had been a Lord
+Provost, and was far declined into the afternoon of life. He did
+not, however, long survive the mutation of his fortune; but bending
+his aged head in sorrow, sank down beneath the stroke, to rise no
+more.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXV YEAR 1794
+
+
+
+This year had opened into all the leafiness of midsummer before
+anything memorable happened in the parish, further than that the sad
+division of my people into government-men and jacobins was
+perfected. This calamity, for I never could consider such
+heartburning among neighbours as any thing less than a very heavy
+calamity, was assuredly occasioned by faults on both sides; but it
+must be confessed that the gentry did nothing to win the commonality
+from the errors of their way. A little more condescension on their
+part would not have made things worse, and might have made them
+better; but pride interposed, and caused them to think that any show
+of affability from them would be construed by the democrats into a
+terror of their power; while the democrats were no less to blame;
+for hearing how their compeers were thriving in France, and
+demolishing every obstacle to their ascendency, they were crouse and
+really insolent, evidencing none of that temperance in prosperity
+that proves the possessors worthy of their good fortune.
+
+As for me, my duty in these circumstances was plain and simple. The
+Christian religion was attempted to be brought into disrepute; the
+rising generation were taught to gibe at its holiest ordinances; and
+the kirk was more frequented as a place to while away the time on a
+rainy Sunday, than for any insight of the admonitions and
+revelations in the sacred book. Knowing this, I perceived that it
+would be of no effect to handle much the mysteries of the faith; but
+as there was at the time a bruit and a sound about universal
+benevolence, philanthropy, utility, and all the other disguises with
+which an infidel philosophy appropriated to itself the charity,
+brotherly love, and welldoing inculcated by our holy religion, I set
+myself to task upon these heads, and thought it no robbery to use a
+little of the stratagem employed against Christ's kingdom, to
+promote the interests thereof in the hearts and understandings of
+those whose ears would have been sealed against me, had I attempted
+to expound higher things. Accordingly, on one day it was my
+practice to show what the nature of Christian charity was, comparing
+it to the light and warmth of the sun, that shines impartially on
+the just and the unjust--showing that man, without the sense of it
+as a duty, was as the beasts that perish, and that every feeling of
+his nature was intimately selfish, but then when actuated by this
+divine impulse, he rose out of himself, and became as a god, zealous
+to abate the sufferings of all things that live; and, on the next
+day, I demonstrated that the new benevolence which had come so much
+into vogue, was but another version of this Christian virtue. In
+like manner, I dealt with brotherly love, bringing it home to the
+business and bosoms of my hearers, that the Christianity of it was
+neither enlarged nor bettered by being baptized with the Greek name
+of philanthropy. With welldoing, however, I went more roundly to
+work, I told my people that I thought they had more sense than to
+secede from Christianity to become Utilitarians; for that it would
+be a confession of ignorance of the faith they deserved, seeing that
+it was the main duty inculcated by our religion to do all in morals
+and manners to which the newfangled doctrine of utility pretended.
+
+These discourses, which I continued for sometime, had no great
+effect on the men; but being prepared in a familiar household
+manner, they took the fancies of the young women, which was to me an
+assurance that the seed I had planted would in time shoot forth; for
+I reasoned with myself, that if the gudeman of the immediate
+generation should continue free-thinkers, their wives will take care
+that those of the next shall not lack that spunk of grace; so I was
+cheered under that obscurity which fell upon Christianity at this
+time, with a vista beyond, in which I saw, as it were, the children
+unborn, walking on the bright green, and in the unclouded splendour
+of the faith.
+
+But what with the decay of trade, and the temptation of the king's
+bounty, and, over all, the witlessness that was in the spirit of man
+at this time, the number that enlisted in the course for the year
+from the parish was prodigious. In one week no less than three
+weavers and two cotton-spinners went over to Ayr, and took the
+bounty of the Royal Artillery. But I could not help remarking to
+myself, that the people were grown so used to changes and
+extraordinary adventures, that the single enlistment of Thomas
+Wilson, at the beginning of the American war, occasioned a far
+greater grief and work among us, than all the swarms that went off
+week after week in the months of November and December of this year.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVI YEAR 1795
+
+
+
+The present Ann. Dom. was ushered in with an event that I had never
+dreaded to see in my day, in our once sober and religious country
+parish. The number of lads that had gone over to Ayr to be soldiers
+from among the spinners and weavers of Cayenneville had been so
+great, that the government got note of it, and sent a recruiting
+party to be quartered in the town; for the term clachan was
+beginning by this time to wear out of fashion: indeed, the place
+itself was outgrowing the fitness of that title. Never shall I
+forget the dunt that the first tap of the drum gied to my heart, as
+I was sitting on Hansel Monday by myself at the parlour fireside,
+Mrs Balwhidder being throng with the lassies looking out a washing,
+and my daughter at Ayr, spending a few days with her old comrades of
+the boarding school. I thought it was the enemy; and then anon the
+sound of the fife came shrill to the ear, for the night was lown and
+peaceful. My wife and all the lassies came flying in upon me,
+crying all in the name of heaven, what could it be? by which I was
+obligated to put on my big-coat, and, with my hat and staff, go out
+to enquire. The whole town was aloof, the aged at the doors in
+clusters, and the bairns following the tattoo, as it was called, and
+at every doubling beat of the drum, shouting as if they had been in
+the face of their foemen.
+
+Mr Archibald Dozendale, one of my elders, was saying to several
+persons around him, just as I came up, "Hech, sirs! but the battle
+draws near our gates," upon which there was a heavy sigh from all
+that heard him; and then they told me of the sergeant's business;
+and we had a serious communing together anent the same. But while
+we were thus standing discoursing on the causey, Mrs Balwhidder and
+the servant lassies could thole no longer, but in a troop came in
+quest of me, to hear what was doing. In short, it was a night both
+of sorrow and anxiety. Mr Dozendale walked back to the manse with
+us, and we had a sober tumbler of toddy together; marvelling
+exceedingly where these fearful portents and changes would stop,
+both of us being of opinion that the end of the world was drawing
+nearer and nearer.
+
+Whether it was, however, that the lads belonging to the place did
+not like to show themselves with the enlistment cockades among their
+acquaintance, or that there was any other reason, I cannot take it
+upon me to say; but certain it is, the recruiting party came no
+speed, and, in consequence, were removed about the end of March.
+
+Another thing happened in this year, too remarkable for me to
+neglect to put on record, as it strangely and strikingly marked the
+rapid revolutions that were going on. In the month of August at the
+time of the fair, a gang of playactors came, and hired Thomas
+Thacklan's barn for their enactments. They were the first of that
+clanjamfrey who had ever been in the parish; and there was a
+wonderful excitement caused by the rumours concerning them. Their
+first performance was DOUGLAS TRAGEDY and the GENTLE SHEPHERD: and
+the general opinion was, that the lad who played Norval in the play,
+and Patie in the farce, was an English lord's son, who had run away
+from his parents rather than marry an old cracket lady with a great
+portion. But, whatever truth there might be in this notion, certain
+it is, the whole pack was in a state of perfect beggary; and yet,
+for all that, they not only in their parts, as I was told, laughed
+most heartily, but made others do the same; for I was constrained to
+let my daughter go to see them, with some of her acquaintance; and
+she gave me such an account of what they did, that I thought I would
+have liked to have gotten a keek at them myself. At the same time,
+I must own this was a sinful curiosity, and I stifled it to the best
+of my ability. Among other plays that they did, was one called
+MACBETH AND THE WITCHES, which the Miss Cayennes had seen performed
+in London, when they were there in the winter time with their
+father, for three months, seeing the world, after coming from the
+boarding-school. But it was no more like the true play of
+Shakespeare the poet, according to their account, than a duddy
+betheral, set up to fright the sparrows from the peas, is like a
+living gentleman. The hungry players, instead of behaving like
+guests at the royal banquet, were voracious on the needful feast of
+bread, and the strong ale, that served for wine in decanters. But
+the greatest sport of all was about a kail-pot, that acted the part
+of a caldron, and which should have sunk with thunder and lightning
+into the earth; however, it did quite as well, for it made its exit,
+as Miss Virginia said, by walking quietly off, being pulled by a
+string fastened to one of its feet. No scene of the play was so
+much applauded as this one; and the actor who did the part of King
+Macbeth made a most polite bow of thankfulness to the audience, for
+the approbation with which they had received the performance of the
+pot.
+
+We had likewise, shortly after the "Omnes exeunt" of the players, an
+exhibition of a different sort in the same barn. This was by two
+English quakers, and a quaker lady, tanners of Kendal, who had been
+at Ayr on some leather business, where they preached, but made no
+proselytes. The travellers were all three in a whisky, drawn by one
+of the best-ordered horses, as the hostler at the Cross-Keys told
+me, ever seen. They came to the Inn to their dinner, and meaning to
+stay all night, sent round, to let it be known that they would hold
+a meeting in Friend Thacklan's barn; but Thomas denied they were
+either kith or kin to him: this, however, was their way of
+speaking.
+
+In the evening, owing to the notice, a great congregation was
+assembled in the barn, and I myself, along with Mr Archibald
+Dozendale, went there likewise, to keep the people in awe; for we
+feared the strangers might be jeered and insulted. The three were
+seated aloft on a high stage, prepared on purpose, with two mares
+and scaffold-deals, borrowed from Mr Trowel the mason. They sat
+long, and silent; but at last the spirit moved the woman, and she
+rose, and delivered a very sensible exposition of Christianity. I
+was really surprised to hear such sound doctrine; and Mr Dozendale
+said, justly, that it was more to the purpose than some that my
+younger brethren from Edinburgh endeavoured to teach. So, that
+those who went to laugh at the sincere simplicity of the pious
+quakers, were rebuked by a very edifying discourse on the moral
+duties of a Christian's life.
+
+Upon the whole, however, this, to the best of my recollection, was
+another unsatisfactory year. In this we were, doubtless, brought
+more into the world; but we had a greater variety of temptation set
+before us, and there was still jealousy and estrangement in the
+dispositions of the gentry, and the lower orders, particularly the
+manufacturers. I cannot say, indeed, that there was any increase of
+corruption among the rural portion of my people; for their vocation
+calling them to work apart, in the purity of the free air of heaven,
+they were kept uncontaminated by that seditious infection which
+fevered the minds of the sedentary weavers, and working like
+flatulence in the stomachs of the cotton-spinners, sent up into
+their heads a vain and diseased fume of infidel philosophy.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVII YEAR 1796
+
+
+
+The prosperity of fortune is like the blossoms of spring, or the
+golden hue of the evening cloud. It delighteth the spirit, and
+passeth away,
+
+In the month of February my second wife was gathered to the Lord.
+She had been very ill for some time with an income in her side,
+which no medicine could remove. I had the best doctors in the
+country side to her; but their skill was of no avail, their opinions
+being that her ail was caused by an internal abscess, for which
+physic has provided no cure. Her death was to me a great sorrow;
+for she was a most excellent wife, industrious to a degree, and
+managed every thing with so brisk a hand, that nothing went wrong
+that she put it to. With her I had grown richer than any other
+minister in the presbytery; but, above all, she was the mother of my
+bairns, which gave her a double claim upon me.
+
+I laid her by the side of my first love, Betty Lanshaw, my own
+cousin that was, and I inscribed her name upon the same headstone;
+but time had drained my poetical vein, and I have not yet been able
+to indite an epitaph on her merits and virtues, for she had an
+eminent share of both. Her greatest fault--the best have their
+faults--was an over-earnestness to gather gear; in the doing of
+which I thought she sometimes sacrificed the comforts of a pleasant
+fireside; for she was never in her element but when she was keeping
+the servants eident at their work. But, if by this she subtracted
+something from the quietude that was most consonant to my nature,
+she has left cause, both in bank and bond, for me and her bairns to
+bless her great household activity.
+
+She was not long deposited in her place of rest till I had occasion
+to find her loss. All my things were kept by her in a most perjink
+and excellent order; but they soon fell into an amazing confusion;
+for, as she often said to me, I had a turn for heedlessness;
+insomuch, that although my daughter Janet was grown up, and able to
+keep the house, I saw that it would be necessary, as soon as decency
+would allow, for me to take another wife. I was moved to this
+chiefly by foreseeing that my daughter would in time be married, and
+taken away from me, but more on account of the servant lasses, who
+grew out of all bounds, verifying the proverb, "Well kens the mouse
+when the cat's out of the house." Besides this, I was now far down
+in the vale of years, and could not expect to be long without
+feeling some of the penalties of old age, although I was still a
+hail and sound man. It therefore behoved me to look in time for a
+helpmate, to tend me in my approaching infirmities.
+
+Upon this important concern I reflected, as I may say, in the
+watches of the night; and, considering the circumstances of my
+situation, I saw it would not do for me to look out for an overly
+young woman, nor yet would it do for one of my ways to take an
+elderly maiden, ladies of that sort being liable to possess strong-
+set particularities. I therefore resolved that my choice should lie
+among widows of a discreet age; and I had a glimmer in my mind of
+speaking to Mrs Malcolm; but when I reflected on the saintly
+steadiness of her character, I was satisfied it would be of no use
+to think of her. Accordingly, I bent my brows, and looked towards
+Irville, which is an abundant trone for widows and other single
+women; and I fixed my purpose on Mrs Nugent, the relic of a
+professor in the university of Glasgow, both because she was a well-
+bred woman, without any children to plea about the interest of my
+own two, and likewise because she was held in great estimation by
+all who knew her, as a lady of a Christian principle.
+
+It was some time in the summer, however, before I made up my mind to
+speak to her on the subject; but one afternoon, in the month of
+August, I resolved to do so, and with that intent walked leisurely
+over to Irville; and after calling on the Rev. Dr. Dinwiddie, the
+minister, I stepped in, as if by chance, to Mrs Nugent's. I could
+see that she was a little surprised at my visit; however, she
+treated me with every possible civility, and her servant lass
+bringing in the tea-things in a most orderly manner, as punctually
+as the clock was striking, she invited me to sit still, and drink my
+tea with her; which I did, being none displeased to get such
+encouragement. However, I said nothing that time, but returned to
+the manse, very well content with what I had observed, which made me
+fain to repeat my visit. So, in the course of the week, taking
+Janet my daughter with me, we walked over in the forenoon, and
+called at Mrs Nugent's first, before going to any other house; and
+Janet saying, as we came out to go to the minister's, that she
+thought Mrs Nugent an agreeable woman, I determined to knock the
+nail on the head without further delay.
+
+Accordingly, I invited the minister and his wife to dine with us on
+the Thursday following; and before leaving the town, I made Janet,
+while the minister and me were handling a subject, as a sort of
+thing in common civility, go to Mrs Nugent, and invite her also.
+Dr. Dinwiddie was a gleg man, of a jocose nature; and he, guessing
+something of what I was ettling at, was very mirthful with me; but I
+kept my own counsel till a meet season.
+
+On the Thursday, the company as invited came, and nothing
+extraordinary was seen; but in cutting up and helping a hen, Dr.
+Dinwiddie put one wing on Mrs Nugent's plate, and the other wing on
+my plate, and said, there have been greater miracles than these two
+wings flying together, which was a sharp joke, that caused no little
+merriment at the expense of Mrs Nugent and me. I, however, to show
+that I was none daunted, laid a leg also on her plate, and took
+another on my own, saying, in the words of the reverend doctor,
+there have been greater miracles than that these two legs should lie
+in the same nest, which was thought a very clever come off; and, at
+the same time, I gave Mrs Nugent a kindly nip on her sonsy arm,
+which was breaking the ice in as pleasant a way as could be. In
+short, before anything passed between ourselves on the subject, we
+were set down for a trysted pair; and this being the case, we were
+married as soon as a twelvemonth and a day had passed from the death
+of the second Mrs Balwhidder; and neither of us have had occasion to
+rue the bargain. It is, however, but a piece of justice due to my
+second wife to say, that this was not a little owing to her good
+management; for she had left such a well-plenished house, that her
+successor said, we had nothing to do but to contribute to one
+another's happiness.
+
+In this year nothing more memorable happened in the parish, saving
+that the cotton-mill dam burst about the time of the Lammas flood,
+and the waters went forth like a deluge of destruction, carrying off
+much victual, and causing a vast of damage to the mills that are
+lower down the stream. It was just a prodigy to see how calmly Mr
+Cayenne acted on that occasion; for, being at other times as crabbed
+as a wud terrier, folk were afraid to tell him, till he came out
+himself in the morning and saw the devastation; at the sight of
+which he gave only a shrill whistle, and began to laugh at the idea
+of the men fearing to take him the news, as if he had not fortune
+and philosophy enough, as he called it, to withstand much greater
+misfortunes.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVIII YEAR 1797
+
+
+
+When I have seen in my walks the irrational creatures of God, the
+birds and the beasts, governed by a kindly instinct in attendance on
+their young, often has it come into my head that love and charity,
+far more than reason or justice, formed the tie that holds the
+world, with all its jarring wants and woes, in social dependence and
+obligation together; and, in this year, a strong verification of the
+soundness of this notion was exemplified in the conduct of the poor
+haverel lassie Meg Gaffaw, whose naturality on the occasion of her
+mother's death I have related at length in this chronicle.
+
+In the course of the summer, Mr Henry Melcomb, who was a nephew to
+Mr Cayenne, came down from England to see his uncle. He had just
+completed his education at the college of Christ Church, in Oxford,
+and was the most perfect young gentleman that had ever been seen in
+this part of the country.
+
+In his appearance he was a very paragon, with a fine manly
+countenance, frank-hearted, blithe, and, in many points of
+character, very like my old friend the Lord Eaglesham, who was shot.
+Indeed, in some respects, he was even above his lordship; for he had
+a great turn at ready wit, and could joke and banter in a most
+agreeable manner. He came very often to the manse to see me, and
+took great pleasure in my company, and really used a freedom that
+was so droll, I could scarcely keep my composity and decorum with
+him. Among others that shared in his attention, was daft Meg
+Gaffaw, whom he had forgathered with one day in coming to see me;
+and after conversing with her for some time, he handed her, as she
+told me herself, over the kirk-stile like a lady of high degree, and
+came with her to the manse door linking by the arm.
+
+From the ill-timed daffin of that hour, poor Meg fell deep in love
+with Mr Melcomb; and it was just a playacting to see the arts and
+antics she put in practice to win his attention. In her garb, she
+had never any sense of a proper propriety, but went about the
+country asking for shapings of silks and satins, with which she
+patched her duds, calling them by the divers names of robes and
+negligees. All hitherto, however, had been moderation, compared to
+the daffadile of vanity which she was now seen, when she had
+searched, as she said, to the bottom of her coffer. I cannot take
+it upon me to describe her; but she kythed in such a variety of
+cuffs and ruffles, feathers, old gumflowers, painted paper knots,
+ribbons, and furs, and laces, and went about gecking and simpering
+with an old fan in her hand, that it was not in the power of nature
+to look at her with sobriety.
+
+Her first appearance in this masquerading was at the kirk on the
+Sunday following her adventure with Mr Melcomb, and it was with a
+sore difficulty that I could keep my eyes off her, even in prayer;
+and when the kirk skailed, she walked before him, spreading all her
+grandeur to catch his eye, in such a manner as had not been seen or
+heard of since the prank that Lady Macadam played Miss Betty
+Wudrife.
+
+Any other but Mr Melcomb would have been provoked by the fool's
+folly; but he humoured her wit, and, to the amazement of the whole
+people, presented her his hand, and allemanded her along in a manner
+that should not have been seen in any street out of a king's court,
+and far less on the Lord's day. But, alas! this sport did not last
+long. Mr Melcomb had come from England to be 'married' to his
+cousin, Miss Virginia Cayenne, and poor daft Meg never heard of it
+till the banns for their purpose of marriage was read out by Mr
+Lorimore on the Sabbath after. The words were scarcely out of his
+mouth, when the simple and innocent natural gave a loud shriek, that
+terrified the whole congregation, and ran out of the kirk demented.
+There was no more finery for poor Meg; but she went and sat opposite
+to the windows of Mr Cayenne's house, where Mr Melcomb was, with
+clasped hands and beseeching eyes, like a monumental statue in
+alabaster, and no entreaty could drive her away. Mr Melcomb sent
+her money, and the bride many a fine thing; but Meg flung them from
+her, and clasped her hands again, and still sat. Mr Cayenne would
+have let loose the house-dog on her, but was not permitted.
+
+In the evening it began to rain, and they thought that and the
+coming darkness would drive her away; but when the servants looked
+out before barring the doors, there she was in the same posture. I
+was to perform the marriage ceremony at seven o'clock in the
+morning, for the young pair were to go that night to Edinburgh; and
+when I went, there was Meg sitting looking at the windows with her
+hands clasped. When she saw me she gave a shrill cry, and took me
+by the hand, and wised me to go back, crying out in a heart-breaking
+voice, "O, Sir! No yet--no yet! He'll maybe draw back, and think
+of a far truer bride." I was wae for her and very angry with the
+servants for laughing at the fond folly of the ill-less thing.
+
+When the marriage was over, and the carriage at the door, the
+bridegroom handed in the bride. Poor Meg saw this, and jumping up
+from where she sat, was at his side like a spirit, as he was
+stepping in, and, taking him by the hand, she looked in his face so
+piteously, that every heart was sorrowful, for she could say
+nothing. When he pulled away his hand, and the door was shut, she
+stood as if she had been charmed to the spot, and saw the chaise
+drive away. All that were about the door then spoke to her, but she
+heard us not. At last she gave a deep sigh, and the water coming
+into her eye, she said, "The worm--the worm is my bonny bridegroom,
+and Jenny with the many-feet my bridal maid. The mill-dam water's
+the wine o' the wedding, and the clay and the clod shall be my
+bedding. A lang night is meet for a bridal, but none shall be
+langer than mine." In saying which words, she fled from among us,
+with heels like the wind. The servants pursued; but long before
+they could stop her, she was past redemption in the deepest plumb of
+the cotton-mill dam.
+
+Few deaths had for many a day happened in the parish, to cause so
+much sorrow as that of this poor silly creature. She was a sort of
+household familiar among us, and there was much like the inner side
+of wisdom in the pattern of her sayings, many of which are still
+preserved as proverbs.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIX YEAR 1798
+
+
+
+This was one of the heaviest years in the whole course of my
+ministry. The spring was slow of coming, and cold and wet when it
+did come; the dibs were full, the roads foul, and the ground that
+should have been dry at the seed-time, was as claggy as clay, and
+clung to the harrow. The labour of man and beast was thereby
+augmented; and all nature being in a state of sluggish
+indisposition, it was evident to every eye of experience that there
+would be a great disappointment to the hopes of the husbandman.
+
+Foreseeing this, I gathered the opinion of all the most sagacious of
+my parishioners, and consulted with them for a provision against the
+evil day, and we spoke to Mr Cayenne on the subject, for he had a
+talent by common in matters of mercantile management. It was
+amazing, considering his hot temper, with what patience he heard the
+grounds of our apprehension, and how he questioned and sifted the
+experience of the old farmers, till he was thoroughly convinced that
+all similar seed-times were ever followed by a short crop. He then
+said, that he would prove himself a better friend to the parish than
+he was thought. Accordingly, as he afterwards told me himself, he
+wrote off that very night to his correspondents in America, to buy
+for his account all the wheat and flour they could get, and ship it
+to arrive early in the fall; and he bought up likewise in countries
+round the Baltic great store of victual, and brought in two cargoes
+to Irville on purpose for the parish, against the time of need,
+making for the occasion a garnel of one of the warehouses of the
+cotton-mill.
+
+The event came to pass as had been foretold: the harvest fell
+short, and Mr Cayenne's cargoes from America and the Baltic came
+home in due season, by which he made a terrible power of money,
+clearing thousands on thousands by post after post--making more
+profit, as he said himself, in the course of one month, he believed,
+than ever was made by any individual within the kingdom of Scotland
+in the course of a year.--He said, however that he might have made
+more if he had bought up the corn at home; but being convinced by us
+that there would be a scarcity, he thought it his duty as an honest
+man to draw from the stores and granaries of foreign countries, by
+which he was sure he would serve his country, and be abundantly
+rewarded. In short, we all reckoned him another Joseph when he
+opened his garnels at the cotton-mill, and, after distributing a
+liberal portion to the poor and needy, selling the remainder at an
+easy rate to the generality of the people. Some of the neighbouring
+parishes, however, were angry that he would not serve them likewise,
+and called him a wicked and extortionate forestaller; but he made it
+plain to the meanest capacity, that if he did not circumscribe his
+dispensation to our own bounds it would be as nothing. So that,
+although he brought a wonderful prosperity in by the cotton-mill,
+and a plenteous supply of corn in a time of famine, doing more in
+these things for the people than all the other heritors had done
+from the beginning of time, he was much reviled; even his bounty was
+little esteemed by my people, because he took a moderate profit on
+what he sold to them. Perhaps, however, these prejudices might be
+partly owing to their dislike of his hasty temper, at least I am
+willing to think so; for it would grieve me if they were really
+ungrateful for a benefit that made the pressure of the time lie but
+lightly on them.
+
+The alarm of the Irish rebellion in this year was likewise another
+source of affliction to us; for many of the gentry coming over in
+great straits, especially ladies and their children, and some of
+them in the hurry of their flight having but little ready money,
+were very ill off. Some four or five families came to the Cross-
+Keys in this situation, and the conduct of Mr Cayenne to them was
+most exemplary. He remembered his own haste with his family from
+Virginia, when the Americans rebelled; and immediately on hearing of
+these Irish refugees, he waited on them with his wife and daughter,
+supplied them with money, invited them to his house, made ploys to
+keep up their spirits, while the other gentry stood back till they
+knew something of the strangers.
+
+Among these destitute ladies was a Mrs Desmond and her two
+daughters, a woman of most august presence, being indeed more like
+one ordained to reign over a kingdom, than for household purposes.
+The Miss Desmonds were only entering their teens, but they also had
+no ordinary stamp upon them. What made this party the more
+particular, was on account of Mr Desmond, who was supposed to be a
+united man with the rebels, and it was known his son was deep in
+their plots; yet although this was all told to Mr Cayenne, by some
+of the other Irish ladies who were of the loyal connexion, it made
+no difference with him, but, on the contrary, he acted as if he
+thought the Desmonds the most of all the refugees entitled to his
+hospitable civilities. This was a wonderment to our strait-laced
+narrow lairds, as there was not a man of such strict government
+principles in the whole country side as Mr Cayenne: but he said he
+carried his political principles only to the camp and the council.
+"To the hospital and the prison," said he, "I take those of a man"--
+which was almost a Christian doctrine, and from that declaration Mr
+Cayenne and me began again to draw a little more cordially together;
+although he had still a very imperfect sense of religion, which I
+attributed to his being born in America, where even as yet, I am
+told, they have but a scanty sprinkling of grace.
+
+But before concluding this year, I should tell the upshot of the
+visitation of the Irish, although it did not take place until some
+time after the peace with France.
+
+In the putting down of the rebels Mr Desmond and his son made their
+escape to Paris, where they stayed till the treaty was signed, by
+which, for several years after the return to Ireland of the grand
+lady and her daughters, as Mrs Desmond was called by our commonalty,
+we heard nothing of them. The other refugees repaid Mr Cayenne his
+money with thankfulness, and, on their restoration to their homes,
+could not sufficiently express their sense of his kindness. But the
+silence and seeming ingratitude of the Desmonds vexed him; and he
+could not abide to hear the Irish rebellion mentioned without flying
+into a passion against the rebels, which every body knew was owing
+to the ill return he had received from that family. However, one
+afternoon, just about half an hour before his wonted dinner hour, a
+grand equipage, with four horses and outriders, stopped at his door,
+and who was in it but Mrs Desmond and an elderly man, and a young
+gentleman with an aspect like a lord. It was her husband and son.
+They had come from Ireland in all their state on purpose to repay
+with interest the money Mr Cayenne had counted so long lost, and to
+express in person the perpetual obligation which he had conferred
+upon the Desmond family, in all time coming. The lady then told
+him, that she had been so straitened in helping the poor ladies,
+that it was not in her power to make repayment till Desmond, as she
+called her husband, came home; and not choosing to assign the true
+reason, lest it might cause trouble, she rather submitted to be
+suspected of ingratitude than to an improper thing.
+
+Mr Cayenne was transported with this unexpected return, and a
+friendship grew up between the families, which was afterwards
+cemented into relationship by the marriage of the young Desmond with
+Miss Caroline Cayenne. Some in the parish objected to this match,
+Mrs Desmond being a papist: but as Miss Caroline had received an
+episcopalian education, I thought it of no consequence, and married
+them after their family chaplain from Ireland, as a young couple
+both by beauty and fortune well matched, and deserving of all
+conjugal felicity.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XL YEAR 1799
+
+
+
+There are but two things to make me remember this year; the first
+was the marriage of my daughter Janet with the reverend Dr.
+Kittlewood of Swappington, a match in every way commendable; and on
+the advice of the third Mrs Balwhidder, I settled a thousand pounds
+down, and promised five hundred more at my death if I died before my
+spouse, and a thousand at her death if she survived me; which was
+the greatest portion ever minister's daughter had in our country
+side. In this year likewise I advanced fifteen hundred pounds for
+my son in a concern in Glasgow,--all was the gathering of that
+indefatigable engine of industry the second Mrs Balwhidder, whose
+talents her successor said were a wonder, when she considered the
+circumstances in which I had been left at her death, and made out of
+a narrow stipend.
+
+The other memorable was the death of Mrs Malcolm. If ever there was
+a saint on this earth, she was surely one. She had been for some
+time bedfast, having all her days from the date of her widowhood
+been a tender woman; but no change made any alteration on the
+Christian contentment of her mind. She bore adversity with an
+honest pride; she toiled in the day of penury and affliction with
+thankfulness for her earnings, although ever so little. She bent
+her head to the Lord in resignation when her first-born fell in
+battle; nor was she puffed up with vanity when her daughters were
+married, as it was said, so far above their degree, though they
+showed it was but into their proper sphere by their demeanour after.
+She lived to see her second son, the captain, rise into affluence,
+married, and with a thriving young family; and she had the very
+great satisfaction, on the last day she was able to go to church, to
+see her youngest son the clergyman standing in my pulpit, a doctor
+of divinity, and the placed minister of a richer parish than mine.
+Well indeed might she have said on that day, "Lord, let thy servant
+depart in peace, for mine eyes have seen thy salvation."
+
+For some time it had been manifest to all who saw her, that her
+latter end was drawing nigh; and therefore, as I had kept up a
+correspondence with her daughters, Mrs Macadam and Mrs Howard, I
+wrote them a particular account of her case, which brought them to
+the clachan. They both came in their own carriages; for Colonel
+Macadam was now a general, and had succeeded to a great property by
+an English uncle, his mother's brother; and Captain Howard, by the
+death of his father, was also a man, as it was said, with a lord's
+living. Robert Malcolm, her son the captain, was in the West Indies
+at the time; but his wife came on the first summons, as did William
+the minister.
+
+They all arrived about four o'clock in the afternoon, and at seven a
+message came for me and Mrs Balwhidder to go over to them, which we
+did, and found the strangers seated by the heavenly patient's
+bedside. On my entering, she turned her eyes towards me, and said,
+"Bear witness, sir, that I die thankful for an extraordinary portion
+of temporal mercies. The heart of my youth was withered like the
+leaf that is scared with the lightning; but in my children I have
+received a great indemnification for the sorrows of that trial."
+She then requested me to pray, saying, "No; let it be a
+thanksgiving. My term is out, and I have nothing more to hope or
+fear from the good or evil of this world. But I have had much to
+make me grateful; therefore, sir, return thanks for the time I have
+been spared, for the goodness granted so long unto me, and the
+gentle hand with which the way from this world is smoothed for my
+passing."
+
+There was something so sweet and consolatory in the way she said
+this, that although it moved all present to tears, they were tears
+without the wonted bitterness of grief. Accordingly, I knelt down
+and did as she had required, and there was a great stillness while I
+prayed. At the conclusion we looked to the bed, but the spirit had,
+in the mean time, departed, and there was nothing remaining but the
+clay tenement.
+
+It was expected by the parish, considering the vast affluence of the
+daughters, that there would have been a grand funeral, and Mrs
+Howard thought it was necessary; but her sister, who had from her
+youth upward a superior discernment of propriety, said, "No, as my
+mother has lived, so shall be her end." Accordingly, everybody of
+any respect in the clachan was invited to the funeral; but none of
+the gentry, saving only such as had been numbered among the
+acquaintance of the deceased. But Mr Cayenne came unbidden, saying
+to me, that although he did not know Mrs Malcolm personally, he had
+often heard she was an amiable woman, and therefore he thought it a
+proper compliment to her family, who were out of the parish, to show
+in what respect she was held among us; for he was a man that would
+take his own way, and do what he thought was right, heedless alike
+of blame or approbation.
+
+If, however, the funeral was plain, though respectable, the ladies
+distributed a liberal sum among the poor families; but before they
+went away, a silent token of their mother's virtue came to light,
+which was at once a source of sorrow and pleasure. Mrs Malcolm was
+first well provided by the Macadams, afterwards the Howards settled
+on her an equal annuity, by which she spent her latter days in great
+comfort. Many a year before, she had repaid Provost Maitland the
+money he sent her in the day of her utmost distress; and at this
+period he was long dead, having died of a broken heart at the time
+of his failure. From that time his widow and her daughters had been
+in very straitened circumstances; but unknown to all but herself,
+and Him from whom nothing is hid, Mrs Malcolm from time to time had
+sent them, in a blank letter, an occasional note to the young ladies
+to buy a gown. After her death, a bank-bill for a sum of money, her
+own savings, was found in her scrutoire, with a note of her own
+writing pinned to the same, stating, that the amount being more than
+she had needed for herself, belonged of right to those who had so
+generously provided for her; but as they were not in want of such a
+trifle, it would be a token of respect to her memory, if they would
+give the bill to Mrs Maitland and her daughters, which was done with
+the most glad alacrity; and, in the doing of it, the private
+kindness was brought to light.
+
+Thus ended the history of Mrs Malcolm, as connected with our Parish
+Annals. Her house was sold, and is the same now inhabited by the
+millwright, Mr Periffery; and a neat house it still is, for the
+possessor is an Englishman, and the English have an uncommon taste
+for snod houses and trim gardens; but at the time it was built,
+there was not a better in the town, though it's now but of the
+second class. Yearly we hear both from Mrs Macadam and her sister,
+with a five-pound note from each to the poor of the parish, as a
+token of their remembrance; but they are far off, and, were any
+thing ailing me, I suppose the gift will not be continued. As for
+Captain Malcolm, he has proved, in many ways, a friend to such of
+our young men as have gone to sea. He has now left it off himself,
+and settled at London, where he latterly sailed from, and, I
+understand, is in a great way as a shipowner. These things I have
+thought it fitting to record, and will now resume my historical
+narration.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLI YEAR 1800
+
+
+
+The same quietude and regularity that marked the progress of the
+last year, continued throughout the whole of this. We sowed and
+reaped in tranquillity, though the sough of distant war came heavily
+from a distance. The cotton-mill did well for the company, and
+there was a sobriety in the minds of the spinners and weavers, which
+showed that the crisis of their political distemperature was over;--
+there was something more of the old prudence in men's reflections;
+and it was plain to see that the elements of reconciliation were
+coming together throughout the world. The conflagration of the
+French Revolution was indeed not extinguished, but it was evidently
+burning out; and their old reverence for the Grand Monarque was
+beginning to revive among them, though they only called him a
+consul. Upon the king's fast I preached on this subject; and when
+the peace was concluded, I got great credit for my foresight, but
+there was no merit in't. I had only lived longer than the most of
+those around me, and had been all my days a close observer of the
+signs of the times; so that what was lightly called prophecy and
+prediction, were but a probability that experience had taught me to
+discern.
+
+In the affairs of the parish, the most remarkable generality (for we
+had no particular catastrophe) was a great death of old people in
+the spring. Among others, Miss Sabrina, the school mistress, paid
+the debt of nature, but we could now better spare her than we did
+her predecessor; for at Cayenneville there was a broken
+manufacturer's wife, an excellent teacher, and a genteel and
+modernised woman, who took the better order of children; and Miss
+Sabrina having been long frail (for she was never stout), a decent
+and discreet carlin, Mrs M'Caffie, the widow of a custom-house
+officer, that was a native of the parish, set up another for plainer
+work. Her opposition Miss Sabrina did not mind, but she was sorely
+displeased at the interloping of Mrs Pirn at Cayenneville, and some
+said it helped to kill her--of that, however, I am not so certain;
+for Dr. Tanzey had told me in the winter, that he thought the sharp
+winds in March would blow out her candle, as it was burnt to the
+snuff; accordingly, she took her departure from this life, on the
+twenty-fifth day of that month, after there had, for some days
+prior, been a most cold and piercing east wind.
+
+Miss Sabrina, who was always an oddity and aping grandeur, it was
+found, had made a will, leaving her gatherings to her favourites,
+with all regular formality. To one she bequeathed a gown, to
+another this, and a third that, and to me a pair of black silk
+stockings. I was amazed when I heard this; but judge what I felt,
+when a pair of old marrowless stockings, darned in the heel, and not
+whole enough in the legs to make a pair of mittens to Mrs
+Balwhidder, were delivered to me by her executor, Mr Caption, the
+lawyer. Saving, however, this kind of flummery, Miss Sabrina was a
+harmless creature, and could quote poetry in discourse more glibly
+than texts of Scripture--her father having spared no pains on her
+mind: as for her body, it could not be mended; but that was not her
+fault.
+
+After her death, the session held a consultation, and we agreed to
+give the same salary that Miss Sabrina enjoyed to Mrs M'Caffie,
+which angered Mr Cayenne, who thought it should have been given to
+the head mistress; and it made him give Mrs Pirn, out of his own
+pocket, double the sum. But we considered that the parish funds
+were for the poor of the parish, and therefore it was our duty to
+provide for the instruction of the poor children. Saving,
+therefore, those few notations, I have nothing further to say
+concerning the topics and progress of this Ann. Dom.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLII YEAR 1801
+
+
+
+It is often to me very curious food for meditation, that as the
+parish increased in population, there should have been less cause
+for matter to record. Things that in former days would have
+occasioned great discourse and cogitation, are forgotten with the
+day in which they happen; and there is no longer that searching into
+personalities which was so much in vogue during the first epoch of
+my ministry, which I reckon the period before the American war; nor
+has there been any such germinal changes among us, as those which
+took place in the second epoch, counting backward from the building
+of the cotton-mill that gave rise to the town of Cayenneville. But
+still we were not, even at this era, of which this Ann. Dom. is the
+beginning, without occasional personality, or an event that deserved
+to be called a germinal.
+
+Some years before, I had noted among the callans at Mr Lorimore's
+school a long soople laddie, who, like all bairns that grow fast and
+tall, had but little smeddum. He could not be called a dolt, for he
+was observant and thoughtful, and giving to asking sagacious
+questions; but there was a sleepiness about him, especially in the
+kirk, and he gave, as the master said, but little application to his
+lessons, so that folk thought he would turn out a sort of gaunt-at-
+the-door, more mindful of meat than work. He was, however, a good-
+natured lad; and, when I was taking my solitary walks of meditation,
+I sometimes fell in with him sitting alone on the brae by the water-
+side, and sometimes lying on the grass, with his hands under his
+head, on the sunny green knolls where Mr Cylinder, the English
+engineer belonging to the cotton-work, has built the bonny house
+that he calls Diryhill Cottage. This was when Colin Mavis was a
+laddie at the school, and when I spoke to him, I was surprised at
+the discretion of his answers; so that gradually I began to think
+and say, that there was more about Colin than the neighbours knew.
+Nothing, however, for many a day, came out to his advantage; so that
+his mother, who was by this time a widow woman, did not well know
+what to do with him, and folk pitied her heavy handful of such a
+droud.
+
+By-and-by, however, it happened that one of the young clerks at the
+cotton-mill shattered his right-hand thumb by a gun bursting; and,
+being no longer able to write, was sent into the army to be an
+ensign, which caused a vacancy in the office; and, through the help
+of Mr Cayenne, I got Colin Mavis into the place, where, to the
+surprise of everybody, he proved a wonderful eident and active lad,
+and, from less to more, has come at the head of all the clerks, and
+deep in the confidentials of his employers. But although this was a
+great satisfaction to me, and to the widow woman his mother, it
+somehow was not so much so to the rest of the parish, who seemed, as
+it were, angry that poor Colin had not proved himself such a dolt as
+they had expected and foretold.
+
+Among other ways that Colin had of spending his leisure, was that of
+playing music on an instrument, in which it was said he made a
+wonderful proficiency; but being long and thin, and of a delicate
+habit of body, he was obligated to refrain from this recreation; so
+he betook himself to books, and from reading he began to try
+writing; but, as this was done in a corner, nobody jealoused what he
+was about, till one evening in this year he came to the manse, and
+asked a word in private with me. I thought that perhaps he had
+fallen in with a lass, and was come to consult me anent matrimony;
+but when we were by ourselves, in my study, he took out of his
+pocket a number of the Scots Magazine, and said, "Sir, you have been
+long pleased to notice me more than any other body, and when I got
+this, I could not refrain from bringing it, to let you see't. Ye
+maun ken, sir, that I have been long in secret given to trying my
+hand at rhyme; and, wishing to ascertain what others thought of my
+power in that way, I sent by the post twa three verses to the Scots
+Magazine, and they have not only inserted them, but placed them in
+the body of the book, in such a way that I kenna what to think." So
+I looked at the Magazine, and read his verses, which were certainly
+very well-made verses for one who had no regular education. But I
+said to him, as the Greenock magistrates said to John Wilson, the
+author of "Clyde," when they stipulated with him to give up the art,
+that poem-making was a profane and unprofitable trade, and he would
+do well to turn his talent to something of more solidity, which he
+promised to do; but he has since put out a book, whereby he has
+angered all those that had foretold he would be a do-nae-gude. Thus
+has our parish walked sidy for sidy with all the national
+improvements, having an author of its own, and getting a literary
+character in the ancient and famous republic of letters.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIII YEAR 1802
+
+
+
+"Experience teaches fools," was the first moral apothegm that I
+wrote in small text, when learning to write at the school, and I
+have ever since thought it was a very sensible reflection. For
+assuredly, as year after year has flown away on the swift wings of
+time, I have found my experience mellowing, and my discernment
+improving; by which I have, in the afternoon of life, been enabled
+to foresee what kings and nations would do, by the symptoms
+manifested within the bounds of the society around me. Therefore,
+at the beginning of the spring in this Ann. Dom., I had misgivings
+at the heart, a fluttering in my thoughts, and altogether a strange
+uneasiness as to the stability of the peace and harmony that was
+supposed to be founded upon a steadfast foundation between us and
+the French people. What my fears principally took their rise from,
+was a sort of compliancy, on the part of those in power and
+authority, to cultivate the old relations and parts between them and
+the commonalty. It did not appear to me that this proceeded from
+any known or decided event, for I read the papers at this period
+daily; but from some general dread and fear, that was begotten, like
+a vapour out of the fermentation of all sorts of opinions; most
+people of any sagacity thinking that the state of things in France
+being so much of an antic, poetical, and playactor-like guise, that
+it would never obtain that respect, far less that reverence from the
+world, which is necessary to the maintenance of all beneficial
+government. The consequence of this was a great distrust between
+man and man, and an aching restlessness among those who had their
+bread to bake in the world; persons possessing the power to provide
+for their kindred, forcing them, as it were, down the throats of
+those who were dependent on them in business, a bitter morsel.
+
+But the pith of these remarks chiefly applies to the manufacturing
+concerns of the new town of Cayenneville; for in the clachan we
+lived in the lea of the dike, and were more taken up with our own
+natural rural affairs, and the markets for victual, than the craft
+of merchandise. The only man interested in business, who walked in
+a steady manner at his old pace, though he sometimes was seen, being
+of a spunkie temper, grinding the teeth of vexation, was Mr Cayenne
+himself.
+
+One day, however, he came to me at the manse. "Doctor," says he,
+for so he always called me, "I want your advice. I never choose to
+trouble others with my private affairs; but there are times when the
+word of an honest man may do good. I need not tell you, that when I
+declared myself a Royalist in America, it was at a considerable
+sacrifice. I have, however, nothing to complain of against
+government on that score; but I think it damn'd hard that those
+personal connexions, whose interests I preserved to the detriment of
+my own, should in my old age make such an ungrateful return. By the
+steps I took prior to quitting America, I saved the property of a
+great mercantile concern in London. In return for that, they took a
+share with me, and for me, in the cotton-mill; and being here on the
+spot, as manager, I have both made and saved them money. I have, no
+doubt, bettered my own fortune in the mean time. Would you believe
+it, doctor, they have written a letter to me, saying that they wish
+to provide for a relation, and requiring me to give up to him a
+portion of my share in the concern--a pretty sort of providing this,
+at another man's expense! But I'll be damn'd if I do any such
+thing! If they want to provide for their friend, let them do so
+from themselves, and not at my cost--What is your opinion?"
+
+This appeared to me a very weighty concern, and, not being versed in
+mercantile dealing, I did not well know what to say; but I reflected
+for some time, and then I replied, "As far, Mr Cayenne, as my
+observation has gone in this world, I think that the giffs and the
+gaffs nearly balance one another; and when they do not, there is a
+moral defect on the failing side. If a man long gives his labour to
+his employer, and is paid for that labour, it might be said that
+both are equal; but I say no. For it's in human nature to be prompt
+to change; and the employer, having always more in his power than
+his servant or agent, it seems to me a clear case, that in the
+course of a number of years, the master of the old servant is the
+obligated of the two; and therefore I say, in the first place, in
+your case there is no tie or claim, by which you may, in a moral
+sense, be called upon to submit to the dictates of your London
+correspondents; but there is a reason, in the nature of the thing
+and case, by which you may ask a favour from them--So, the advice I
+would give you would be this: write an answer to their letter, and
+tell them that you have no objection to the taking in of a new
+partner, but you think it would be proper to revise all the
+copartnery, especially as you have, considering the manner in which
+you have advanced the business, been of opinion, that your share
+should be considerably enlarged."
+
+I thought Mr Cayenne would have louped out of his skin with mirth at
+this notion; and, being a prompt man, he sat down at my scrutoire,
+and answered the letter which gave him so much uneasiness. No
+notice was taken of it for some time; but in the course of a month
+he was informed, that it was not considered expedient at that time
+to make any change in the company. I thought the old man was gone
+by himself when he got this letter. He came over instantly in his
+chariot, from the cotton-mill office to the manse, and swore an
+oath, by some dreadful name, that I was a Solomon. However, I only
+mention this to show how experience had instructed me, and as a
+sample of that sinister provisioning of friends that was going on in
+the world at this time--all owing, as I do verily believe, to the
+uncertain state of governments and national affairs.
+
+Besides these generalities, I observed another thing working to
+effect--mankind read more, and the spirit of reflection and
+reasoning was more awake than at any time within my remembrance.
+Not only was there a handsome bookseller's shop in Cayenneville,
+with a London newspaper daily, but magazines, and reviews, and other
+new publications.
+
+Till this year, when a chaise was wanted we had to send to Irville;
+but Mr Toddy of the Cross-Keys being in at Glasgow, he bought an
+excellent one at the second-hand, a portion of the effects of a
+broken merchant, by which, from that period, we had one of our own,
+and it proved a great convenience; for I, who never but twice in my
+life before hired that kind of commodity, had it thrice during the
+summer, for a bit jaunt with Mrs Balwhidder to divers places and
+curiosities in the county that I had not seen before, by which our
+ideas were greatly enlarged; indeed, I have always had a partiality
+for travelling, as one of the best means of opening the faculty of
+the mind, and giving clear and correct notions of men and things.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIV YEAR 1803
+
+
+
+During the tempestuous times that ensued, from the death of the King
+of France by the hands of the executioner in 1793, there had been a
+political schism among my people that often made me very uneasy.
+The folk belonging to the cotton-mill, and the muslin-weavers in
+Cayenneville, were afflicted with the itch of jacobinism, but those
+of the village were stanch and true to king and country; and some of
+the heritors were desirous to make volunteers of the young men of
+them, in case of anything like the French anarchy and confusion
+rising on the side of the manufacturers. I, however, set myself, at
+that time, against this, for I foresaw that the French business was
+but a fever which would soon pass off; but no man could tell the
+consequence of putting arms in the hands of neighbour against
+neighbour, though it was but in the way of policy.
+
+But when Bonaparte gathered his host fornent the English coast, and
+the government at London were in terror of their lives for an
+invasion, all in the country saw that there was danger, and I was
+not backward in sounding the trumpet to battle. For a time,
+however, there was a diffidence among us somewhere. The gentry had
+a distrust of the manufacturers, and the farming lads were wud with
+impatience, that those who should be their leaders would not come
+forth. I, knowing this, prepared a sermon suitable to the occasion,
+giving out from the pulpit myself, the Sabbath before preaching it,
+that it was my intent, on the next Lord's day, to deliver a
+religious and political exhortation on the present posture of public
+affairs. This drew a vast congregation of all ranks.
+
+I trow that the stoor had no peace in the stuffing of the pulpit in
+that day; and the effect was very great and speedy: for next
+morning the weavers and cotton-mill folk held a meeting, and they,
+being skilled in the ways of committees and associating together,
+had certain resolutions prepared, by which a select few was
+appointed to take an enrolment of all willing in the parish to serve
+as volunteers in defence of their king and country, and to concert
+with certain gentlemen named therein, about the formation of a
+corps, of which, it was an understood thing, the said gentlemen were
+to be the officers. The whole of this business was managed with the
+height of discretion; and the weavers, and spinners, and farming
+lads, vied with one another who should be first on the list. But
+that which the most surprised me, was the wonderful sagacity of the
+committee in naming the gentlemen that should be the officers. I
+could not have made a better choice myself; for they were the best
+built, the best bred, and the best natured, in the parish. In
+short, when I saw the bravery that was in my people, and the spirit
+of wisdom by which it was directed, I said in my heart, the Lord of
+Hosts is with us, and the adversary shall not prevail.
+
+The number of valiant men which at that time placed themselves
+around the banners of their country was so great, that the
+government would not accept of all who offered; so, like as in other
+parishes, we were obligated to make a selection, which was likewise
+done in a most judicious manner, all men above a certain age being
+reserved for the defence of the parish, in the day when the young
+might be called to England to fight the enemy.
+
+When the corps was formed, and the officers named, they made me
+their chaplain, and Dr. Marigold their doctor. He was a little man
+with a big belly, and was as crouse as a bantam cock; but it was not
+thought he could do so well in field exercises, on which account he
+was made the doctor, although he had no repute in that capacity in
+comparison with Dr. Tanzey, who was not, however, liked, being a
+stiff-mannered man, with a sharp temper.
+
+All things having come to a proper head, the young ladies of the
+parish resolved to present the corps with a stand of colours, which
+they embroidered themselves, and a day was fixed for the
+presentation of the same. Never was such a day seen in Dalmailing.
+The sun shone brightly on that scene of bravery and grandeur, and
+far and near the country folk came flocking in; and we had the
+regimental band of music hired from the soldiers that were in Ayr
+barracks. The very first sound o't made the hair on my old grey
+head to prickle up, and my blood to rise and glow as if youth was
+coming again into my veins.
+
+Sir Hugh Montgomerie was the commandant; and he came in all the
+glory of war, on his best horse, and marched at the head of the men
+to the green-head. The doctor and me were the rearguard: not being
+able, on account of my age and his fatness, to walk so fast as the
+quick-step of the corps. On the field, we took our place in front,
+near Sir Hugh and the ladies with the colours; and after some
+salutations, according to the fashion of the army, Sir Hugh made a
+speech to the men, and then Miss Maria Montgomerie came forward,
+with her sister Miss Eliza, and the other ladies, and the banners
+were unfurled, all glittering with gold, and the king's arms in
+needlework. Miss Maria then made a speech, which she had got by
+heart; but she was so agitated that it was said she forgot the best
+part of it: however, it was very well considering. When this was
+done, I then stepped forward, and laying my hat on the ground, every
+man and boy taking off theirs, I said a prayer, which I had conned
+most carefully, and which I thought the most suitable I could
+devise, in unison with Christian principles, which are averse to the
+shedding of blood; and I particularly dwelt upon some of the
+specialities of our situation.
+
+When I had concluded, the volunteers gave three great shouts, and
+the multitude answered them to the same tune, and all the
+instruments of music sounded, making such a bruit as could not be
+surpassed for grandeur--a long, and very circumstantial account of
+all which, may be read in the newspapers of that time.
+
+The volunteers, at the word of command, then showed us the way they
+were to fight with the French, in the doing of which a sad disaster
+happened; for when they were charging bayonets, they came towards us
+like a flood, and all the spectators ran; and I ran, and the doctor
+ran; but being laden with his belly, he could not run fast enough,
+so he lay down, and being just before me at the time, I tumbled over
+him, and such a shout of laughter shook the field as was never
+heard.
+
+When the fatigues of the day were at an end, we marched to the
+cotton-mill, where, in one of the ware-houses, a vast table was
+spread, and a dinner, prepared at Mr Cayenne's own expense, sent in
+from the Cross-Keys, and the whole corps, with many of the gentry of
+the neighbourhood, dined with great jollity, the band of music
+playing beautiful airs all the time. At night there was a universal
+dance, gentle and semple mingled together. All which made it plain
+to me, that the Lord, by this unison of spirit, had decreed our
+national preservation; but I kept this in my own breast, lest it
+might have the effect to relax the vigilance of the kingdom. And I
+should note that Colin Mavis, the poetical lad, of whom I have
+spoken in another part, made a song for this occasion that was very
+mightily thought of, having in it a nerve of valiant genius, that
+kindled the very souls of those that heard it.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLV YEAR 1804
+
+
+
+In conformity with the altered fashions of the age, in this year the
+session came to an understanding with me, that we should not inflict
+the common church censures for such as made themselves liable
+thereto; but we did not formally promulge our resolution as to this,
+wishing as long as possible to keep the deterring rod over the heads
+of the young and thoughtless. Our motive, on the one hand, was the
+disregard of the manufacturers in Cayenneville, who were, without
+the breach of truth, an irreligious people; and, on the other, a
+desire to preserve the ancient and wholesome admonitory and
+censorian jurisdiction of the minister and elders. We therefore
+laid it down as a rule to ourselves, that, in the case of
+transgressions on the part of the inhabitants of the new district of
+Cayenneville, we should subject them rigorously to a fine; but that
+for the farming-lads, we would put it in their option to pay the
+fine, or stand in the kirk.
+
+We conformed also in another matter to the times, by consenting to
+baptize occasionally in private houses. Hitherto it had been a
+strict rule with me only to baptize from the pulpit. Other
+parishes, however, had long been in the practice of this relaxation
+of ancient discipline.
+
+But all this on my part, was not done without compunction of spirit;
+for I was of opinion, that the principle of Presbyterian integrity
+should have been maintained to the uttermost. Seeing, however, the
+elders set on an alteration, I distrusted my own judgment, and
+yielded myself to the considerations that weighed with them; for
+they were true men, and of a godly honesty, and took the part of the
+poor in all contentions with the heritors, often to the hazard and
+damage of their own temporal welfare.
+
+I have now to note a curious thing, not on account of its
+importance, but to show to what lengths a correspondence had been
+opened in the parish with the farthest parts of the earth. Mr
+Cayenne got a turtle-fish sent to him from a Glasgow merchant, and
+it was living when it came to the Wheatrig House, and was one of the
+most remarkable beasts that had ever been seen in our country side.
+It weighed as much as a well-fed calf, and had three kinds of meat
+in its body, fish, flesh, and fowl, and it had four water-wings, for
+they could not be properly called fins; but what was little short of
+a miracle about the creature, happened after the head was cutted
+off, when, if a finger was offered to it, it would open its mouth
+and snap at it, and all this after the carcass was divided for
+dressing.
+
+Mr Cayenne made a feast on the occasion to many of the neighbouring
+gentry, to the which I was invited; and we drank lime-punch as we
+ate the turtle, which, as I understand, is the fashion in practice
+among the Glasgow West Indy merchants, who are famed as great hands
+with turtles and lime-punch. But it is a sort of food that I should
+not like to fare long upon. I was not right the next day; and I
+have heard it said, that when eaten too often, it has a tendency to
+harden the heart and make it crave for greater luxuries.
+
+But the story of the turtle is nothing to that of the Mass, which,
+with all its mummeries and abominations, was brought into
+Cayenneville by an Irish priest of the name of Father O'Grady, who
+was confessor to some of the poor deluded Irish labourers about the
+new houses and the cotton-mill. How he had the impudence to set up
+that memento of Satan, the crucifix, within my parish and
+jurisdiction, was what I never could get to the bottom of; but the
+soul was shaken within me, when, on the Monday after, one of the
+elders came to the manse, and told me that the old dragon of Popery,
+with its seven heads and ten horns, had been triumphing in
+Cayenneville on the foregoing Lord's day! I lost no time in
+convening the session to see what was to be done; much, however, to
+my surprise, the elders recommended no step to be taken, but only a
+zealous endeavour to greater Christian excellence on our part, by
+which we should put the beast and his worshippers to shame and
+flight. I am free to confess, that, at the time, I did not think
+this the wisest counsel which they might have given; for, in the
+heat of my alarm, I was for attacking the enemy in his camp. But
+they prudently observed, that the days of religious persecution were
+past, and it was a comfort to see mankind cherishing any sense of
+religion at all, after the vehement infidelity that had been sent
+abroad by the French Republicans; and to this opinion, now that I
+have had years to sift its wisdom, I own myself a convert and
+proselyte.
+
+Fortunately, however, for my peace of mind, there proved to be but
+five Roman Catholics in Cayenneville; and Father O'Grady not being
+able to make a living there, packed up his Virgin Marys, saints, and
+painted Agneses in a portmanteau, and went off in the Ayr fly one
+morning for Glasgow, where I hear he has since met with all the
+encouragement that might be expected from the ignorant and
+idolatrous inhabitants of that great city.
+
+Scarcely were we well rid of Father O'Grady, when another interloper
+entered the parish. He was more dangerous, in the opinion of the
+session, than even the Pope of Rome himself; for he came to teach
+the flagrant heresy of Universal Redemption, a most consolatory
+doctrine to the sinner that is loth to repent, and who loves to
+troll his iniquity like a sweet morsel under his tongue. Mr Martin
+Siftwell, who was the last ta'en on elder, and who had received a
+liberal and judicious education, and was, moreover, naturally
+possessed of a quick penetration, observed, in speaking of this new
+doctrine, that the grossest papist sinner might have some qualms of
+fear after he had bought the Pope's pardon, and might thereby be led
+to a reformation of life; but that the doctrine of universal
+redemption was a bribe to commit sin, the wickedest mortal,
+according to it, being only liable to a few thousand years, more or
+less, of suffering, which, compared with eternity, was but a
+momentary pang, like having a tooth drawn for the toothache. Mr
+Siftwell is a shrewd and clear-seeing man in points of theology, and
+I would trust a great deal to what he says, as I have not, at my
+advanced age, such a mind for the kittle crudities of polemical
+investigation that I had in my younger years, especially when I was
+a student in the Divinity Hall of Glasgow.
+
+It will be seen from all I have herein recorded, that, in the course
+of this year, there was a general resuscitation of religious
+sentiments; for what happened in my parish was but a type and index
+to the rest of the world. We had, however, one memorable that must
+stand by itself; for although neither death nor bloodshed happened,
+yet was it cause of the fear of both.
+
+A rumour reached us from the Clyde, that a French man-of-war had
+appeared in a Highland loch, and that all the Greenock volunteers
+had embarked in merchant vessels to bring her in for a prize. Our
+volunteers were just jumping and yowling, like chained dogs, to be
+at her too; but the colonel, Sir Hugh, would do nothing without
+orders from his superiors. Mr Cayenne, though an aged man above
+seventy, was as bold as a lion, and came forth in the old garb of an
+American huntsman, like, as I was told, a Robin Hood in the play is;
+and it was just a sport to see him, feckless man, trying to march so
+crousely with his lean, shaking hands. But the whole affair proved
+a false alarm, and our men, when they heard it, were as well pleased
+that they had been constrained to sleep in their warm beds at home,
+instead of lying on coils of cables, like the gallant Greenock
+sharp-shooters.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVI YEAR 1805
+
+
+
+For some time I had meditated a reformation in the parish, and this
+year I carried the same into effect. I had often noticed with
+concern, that, out of a mistaken notion of paying respect to the
+dead, my people were wont to go to great lengths at their burials,
+and dealt round short-bread and sugar-biscuit, with wine and other
+confections, as if there had been no ha'd in their hands; which
+straitened many a poor family, making the dispensation of the Lord a
+heavier temporal calamity than it should naturally have been.
+Accordingly, on consulting with Mrs Balwhidder, who has a most
+judicious judgment, it was thought that my interference would go a
+great way to lighten the evil. I therefore advised with those whose
+friends were taken from them, not to make that amplitude of
+preparation which used to be the fashion, nor to continue handing
+about as long as the folk would take, but only at the very most to
+go no more than three times round with the service. Objections were
+made to this, as if it would be thought mean; but I put on a stern
+visage, and told them, that if they did more I would rise up, and
+rebuke and forbid the extravagance. So three services became the
+uttermost modicum at all burials. This was doing much, but it was
+not all that I wished to do.
+
+I considered that the best reformations are those which proceed step
+by step, and stop at that point where the consent to what has been
+established becomes general; and so I governed myself, and therefore
+interfered no farther; but I was determined to set an example.
+Accordingly, at the very next dregy, after I partook of one service,
+I made a bow to the servitors and they passed on, but all before me
+had partaken of the second service; some, however, of those after me
+did as I did, so I foresaw that in a quiet canny way I would bring
+in the fashion of being satisfied with one service. I therefore,
+from that time, always took my place as near as possible to the
+door, where the chief mourner sat, and made a point of nodding away
+the second service, which has now grown into a custom, to the great
+advantage of surviving relations.
+
+But in this reforming business I was not altogether pleased with our
+poet; for he took a pawkie view of my endeavours, and indited a
+ballad on the subject, in the which he makes a clattering carlin
+describe what took place, so as to turn a very solemn matter into a
+kind of derision. When he brought his verse and read it to me, I
+told him that I thought it was overly natural; for I could not find
+another term to designate the cause of the dissatisfaction that I
+had with it; but Mrs Balwhidder said that it might help my plan if
+it were made public; so upon her advice we got some of Mr Lorimore's
+best writers to make copies of it for distribution, which was not
+without fruit and influence. But a sore thing happened at the very
+next burial. As soon as the nodding away of the second service
+began, I could see that the gravity of the whole meeting was
+discomposed; and some of the irreverent young chiels almost broke
+out into even-down laughter, which vexed me exceedingly. Mrs
+Balwhidder, howsoever, comforted me by saying, that custom in time
+would make it familiar, and by-and-by the thing would pass as a
+matter of course, until one service would be all that folk would
+offer; and truly the thing is coming to that, for only two services
+are now handed round, and the second is regularly nodded by.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVII YEAR 1806
+
+
+
+Mr Cayenne of Wheatrig having for several years been in a declining
+way, partly brought on by the consuming fire of his furious passion,
+and partly by the decay of old age, sent for me on the evening of
+the first Sabbath of March in this year. I was surprised at the
+message, and went to the Wheatrig House directly, where, by the
+lights in the windows as I gaed up through the policy to the door, I
+saw something extraordinary was going on. Sambo, the blackamoor
+servant, opened the door, and, without speaking, shook his head; for
+it was an affectionate creature, and as fond of his master as if he
+had been his own father. By this sign I guessed that the old
+gentleman was thought to be drawing near his latter end; so I walked
+softly after Sambo up the stair, and was shown into the chamber
+where Mr Cayenne, since he had been confined to the house, usually
+sat. His wife had been dead some years before.
+
+Mr Cayenne was sitting in his easy chair, with a white cotton
+nightcap on his head, and a pillow at his shoulders to keep him
+straight. But his head had fallen down on his breast, and he
+breathed like a panting baby. His legs were swelled, and his feet
+rested on a footstool. His face, which was wont to be the colour of
+a peony rose, was of a yellow hue, with a patch of red on each cheek
+like a wafer; and his nose was shirpit and sharp, and of an
+unnatural purple. Death was evidently fighting with nature for the
+possession of the body. "Heaven have mercy on his soul!" said I to
+myself, as I sat down beside him.
+
+When I had been seated some time, the power was given him to raise
+his head as it were a-jee; and he looked at me with the tail of his
+eye, which I saw was glittering and glassy. "Doctor," for he always
+called me doctor, though I am not of that degree, "I am glad to see
+you," were his words, uttered with some difficulty.
+
+"How do you find yourself, sir?" I replied, in a sympathising
+manner.
+
+"Damned bad," said he, as if I had been the cause of his suffering.
+I was daunted to the very heart to hear him in such an unregenerate
+state; but after a short pause I addressed myself to him again,
+saying, that "I hoped he would soon be more at ease; and he should
+bear in mind that the Lord chasteneth whom he loveth."
+
+"The devil take such love!" was his awful answer, which was to me as
+a blow on the forehead with a mell. However, I was resolved to do
+my duty to the miserable sinner, let him say what he would.
+Accordingly, I stooped towards him with my hands on my knees, and
+said in a compassionate voice, "It's very true, sir, that you are in
+great agony; but the goodness of God is without bound."
+
+"Curse me if I think so, doctor!" replied the dying uncircumcised
+Philistine. But he added at whiles, his breathlessness being
+grievous, and often broken by a sore hiccup, "I am, however, no
+saint, as you know, doctor; so I wish you to put in a word for me,
+doctor; for you know that in these times, doctor, it is the duty of
+every good subject to die a Christian."
+
+This was a poor account of the state of his soul; but it was plain I
+could make no better o't, by entering into any religious discourse
+or controversy with him, he being then in the last gasp; so I knelt
+down and prayed for him with great sincerity, imploring the Lord, as
+an awakening sense of grace to the dying man, that it would please
+him to lift up, though it were but for the season of a minute, the
+chastening hand which was laid so heavily upon his aged servant; at
+which Mr Cayenne, as if, indeed, the hand had been then lifted,
+cried out, "None of that stuff, doctor; you know that I cannot call
+myself his servant."
+
+Was ever a minister in his prayer so broken in upon by a perishing
+sinner! However, I had the weight of a duty upon me, and made no
+reply, but continued, "Thou hearest, O Lord, how he confesses his
+unworthiness! Let not thy compassion, therefore, be withheld, but
+verify to him the words that I have spoken in faith, of the
+boundlessness of thy goodness, and the infinite multitude of thy
+tender mercies." I then calmly, but sadly, sat down, and presently,
+as if my prayer had been heard, relief was granted; for Mr Cayenne
+raised his head, and giving me a queer look, said, "That last clause
+of your petition, doctor, was well put, and I think, too, it has
+been granted, for I am easier"--adding, "I have no doubt, doctor,
+given much offence in the world, and oftenest when I meant to do
+good; but I have wilfully injured no man; and as God is my judge,
+and his goodness, you say, is so great, he may, perhaps, take my
+soul into his holy keeping." In saying which words, Mr Cayenne
+dropped his head upon his breast, his breathing ceased, and he was
+wafted away out of this world with as little trouble as a blameless
+baby.
+
+This event soon led to a change among us. In the settling of Mr
+Cayenne's affairs in the Cotton-mill Company, it was found that he
+had left such a power of money, that it was needful to the concern,
+in order that they might settle with the doers under his testament,
+to take in other partners. By this Mr Speckle came to be a resident
+in the parish, he having taken up a portion of Mr Cayenne's share.
+He likewise took a tack of the house and policy of Wheatrig. But
+although Mr Speckle was a far more conversible man than his
+predecessor, and had a wonderful plausibility in business, the
+affairs of the company did not thrive in his hands. Some said this
+was owing to his having owre many irons in the fire; others, to the
+circumstances of the times: in my judgment, however, both helped;
+but the issue belongs to the events of another year. In the
+meanwhile, I should here note, that in the course of this current
+Ann. Dom. it pleased Heaven to visit me with a severe trial; the
+nature of which I will here record at length--the upshot I will make
+known hereafter.
+
+From the planting of inhabitants in the cotton-mill town of
+Cayenneville, or as the country folk, not used to used to such lang-
+nebbit words, now call it, Canaille, there had come in upon the
+parish various sectarians among the weavers, some of whom were not
+satisfied with the gospel as I preached it, and endeavoured to
+practise it in my walk and conversation; and they began to speak of
+building a kirk for themselves, and of getting a minster that would
+give them the gospel more to their own ignorant fancies. I was
+exceedingly wroth and disturbed when the thing was first mentioned
+to me; and I very earnestly, from the pulpit, next Lord's day,
+lectured on the growth of newfangled doctrines; which, however,
+instead of having the wonted effect of my discourses, set up the
+theological weavers in a bleeze, and the very Monday following they
+named a committee, to raise money by subscription to build a
+meeting-house. This was the first overt act of insubordination,
+collectively manifested, in the parish; and it was conducted with
+all that crafty dexterity with which the infidel and jacobin spirit
+of the French Revolution had corrupted the honest simplicity of our
+good old hameward fashions. In the course of a very short time, the
+Canaille folk had raised a large sum, and seduced not a few of my
+people into their schism, by which they were enabled to set about
+building their kirk; the foundations thereof were not, however, laid
+till the following year, but their proceedings gave me a het heart,
+for they were like an open rebellion to my authority, and a
+contemptuous disregard of that religious allegiance which is due
+from the flock to the pastor.
+
+On Christmas-day the wind broke off the main arm of our Adam and Eve
+pear-tree; and I grieved for it more as a type and sign of the
+threatened partition, than on account of the damage, though the
+fruit was the juiciest in all the country side.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVIII YEAR 1807
+
+
+
+This was a year to me of satisfaction in many points; for a greater
+number of my younger flock married in it, than had done for any one
+of ten years prior. They were chiefly the offspring of the
+marriages that took place at the close of the American war; and I
+was pleased to see the duplification of well-doing, as I think
+marrying is, having always considered the command to increase and
+multiply, a holy ordinance, which the circumstances of this world
+but too often interfere to prevent.
+
+It was also made manifest to me, that in this year there was a very
+general renewal in the hearts of men, of a sense of the utility,
+even in earthly affairs, of a religious life: in some, I trust it
+was more than prudence, and really a birth of grace. Whether this
+was owing to the upshot of the French Revolution, all men being
+pretty well satisfied in their minds, that uproar and rebellion make
+but an ill way of righting wrongs, or that the swarm of unruly youth
+the offspring, as I have said, of the marriages after the American
+war, had grown sobered from their follies, and saw things in a
+better light, I cannot take upon me to say. But it was very
+edifying to me, their minister, to see several lads who had been
+both wild and free in their principles, marrying with sobriety, and
+taking their wives to the kirk with the comely decorum of heads of
+families.
+
+But I was now growing old, and could go seldomer out among my people
+than in former days; so that I was less a partaker of their ploys
+and banquets, either at birth, bridal, or burial. I heard, however,
+all that went on at them, and I made it a rule, after giving the
+blessing at the end of the ceremony, to admonish the bride and
+bridegroom to ca' canny, and join trembling with their mirth. It
+behoved me on one occasion, however, to break through a rule that
+age and frailty had imposed upon me, and to go to the wedding of
+Tibby Banes, the daughter of the betheral, because she had once been
+a servant in the manse, besides the obligation upon me, from her
+father's part both in the kirk and kirkyard. Mrs Balwhidder went
+with me, for she liked to countenance the pleasantries of my people;
+and, over and above all, it was a pay-wedding, in order to set up
+the bridegroom in a shop.
+
+There was, to be sure, a great multitude, gentle and semple, of all
+denominations, with two fiddles and a bass, and the volunteers' fife
+and drum; and the jollity that went on was a perfect feast of
+itself, though the wedding-supper was a prodigy of abundance. The
+auld carles kecklet with fainness as they saw the young dancers; and
+the carlins sat on forms, as mim as May puddocks, with their shawls
+pinned apart, to show their muslin napkins. But, after supper, when
+they had got a glass of the punch, their heels showed their mettle,
+and grannies danced with their oyes, holding out their hands as if
+they had been spinning with two rocks. I told Colin Mavis, the
+poet, than an INFARE was a fine subject for his muse; and soon after
+he indited an excellent ballad under that title, which he projects
+to publish, with other ditties, by subscription; and I have no doubt
+a liberal and discerning public will give him all manner of
+encouragement, for that is the food of talent of every kind; and
+without cheering, no one can say what an author's faculty naturally
+is.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIX YEAR 1808
+
+
+
+Through all the wars that have raged from the time of the King's
+accession to the throne, there has been a gradually coming nearer
+and nearer to our gates, which is a very alarming thing to think of.
+In the first, at the time he came to the crown, we suffered nothing.
+Not one belonging to the parish was engaged in the battles thereof;
+and the news of victories, before they reached us, which was
+generally by word of mouth, were old tales. In the American war, as
+I have related at length, we had an immediate participation; but
+those that suffered were only a few individuals, and the evil was
+done at a distance, and reached us not until the worst of its
+effects were spent. And during the first term of the present just
+and necessary contest for all that is dear to us as a people,
+although, by the offswarming of some of our restless youth, we had
+our part and portion in common with the rest of the Christian world;
+yet still there was at home a great augmentation of prosperity, and
+every thing had thriven in a surprising manner; somewhat, however,
+to the detriment of our country simplicity. By the building of the
+cotton-mill, and the rising up of the new town of Cayenneville, we
+had intromitted so much with concerns of trade, that we were become
+a part of the great web of commercial reciprocities, and felt in our
+corner and extremity, every touch or stir that was made on any part
+of the texture. The consequence of this I have now to relate.
+
+Various rumours had been floating about the business of the cotton
+manufacturers not being so lucrative as it had been; and Bonaparte,
+as it is well known, was a perfect limb of Satan against our
+prosperity, having recourse to the most wicked means and purposes to
+bring ruin upon us as a nation. His cantrips, in this year, began
+to have a dreadful effect.
+
+For some time it had been observed in the parish, that Mr Specle of
+the cotton-mill, went very often to Glasgow, and was sometimes off
+at a few minutes' warning to London; and the neighbours began to
+guess and wonder at what could be the cause of all this running
+here, and riding there, as if the little-gude was at his heels.
+Sober folk augured ill o't; and it was remarked, likewise, that
+there was a haste and confusion in his mind, which betokened a
+foretaste of some change of fortune. At last, in the fulness of
+time, the babe was born.
+
+On a Saturday night, Mr Speckle came out late from Glasgow; on the
+Sabbath he was with all his family at the kirk, looking as a man
+that had changed his way of life; and on the Monday, when the
+spinners went to the mill, they were told that the company had
+stopped payment. Never did a thunder-clap daunt the heart like this
+news; for the bread in a moment was snatched from more than a
+thousand mouths. It was a scene not to be described, to see the
+cotton-spinners and the weavers, with their wives and children,
+standing in bands along the road, all looking and speaking as if
+they had lost a dear friend or parent. For my part, I could not
+bear the sight, but hid myself in my closet, and prayed to the Lord
+to mitigate a calamity which seemed to me past the capacity of man
+to remedy; for what could our parish fund do in the way of helping a
+whole town, thus suddenly thrown out of bread?
+
+In the evening, however, I was strengthened, and convened the elders
+at the manse to consult with them on what was best to be done; for
+it was well known that the sufferers had made no provision for a
+sore foot. But all our gathered judgments could determine nothing;
+and therefore we resolved to wait the issue, not doubting but that
+He who sends the night, would bring the day in His good and gracious
+time, which so fell out. Some of them who had the largest
+experience of such vicissitudes, immediately began to pack up their
+ends and their awls, and to hie them into Glasgow and Paisley in
+quest of employ; but those who trusted to the hopes that Mr Speckle
+himself still cherished, lingered long, and were obligated to submit
+to sore distress. After a time, however, it was found that the
+company was ruined; and the mill being sold for the benefit of the
+creditors, it was bought by another Glasgow company, who, by getting
+a good bargain, and managing well, have it still, and have made it
+again a blessing to the country. At the time of the stoppage,
+however, we saw that commercial prosperity, flush as it might be,
+was but a perishable commodity, and from thence, both by public
+discourse and private exhortation, I have recommended to the workmen
+to lay up something for a reverse; and showed that, by doing with
+their bawbees and pennies what the great do with their pounds, they
+might in time get a pose to help them in the day of need. This
+advice they have followed, and made up a Savings Bank, which is a
+pillow of comfort to many an industrious head of a family.
+
+But I should not close this account of the disaster that befell Mr
+Speckle, and the cotton-mill company, without relating a very
+melancholy case that was the consequence. Among the overseers there
+was a Mr Dwining, an Englishman from Manchester, where he had seen
+better days, having had himself there of his own property, once as
+large a mill, according to report, as the Cayenneville mill. He was
+certainly a man above the common, and his wife was a lady in every
+point; but they held themselves by themselves, and shunned all
+manner of civility, giving up their whole attention to their two
+little boys, who were really like creatures of a better race than
+the callans of our clachan.
+
+On the failure of the company, Mr Dwining was observed by those who
+were present to be particularly distressed: his salary being his
+all; but he said little, and went thoughtfully home. Some days
+after he was seen walking by himself with a pale face, a heavy eye,
+and slow step--all tokens of a sorrowful heart. Soon after, he was
+missed altogether; nobody saw him. The door of his house was
+however open, and his two pretty boys were as lively as usual, on
+the green before the door. I happened to pass when they were there,
+and I asked them how their father and mother were. They said they
+were still in bed, and would not waken, and the innocent lambs took
+me by the hand, to make me waken their parents. I know not what was
+in it, but I trembled from head to foot, and I was led in by the
+babies, as if I had not the power to resist. Never shall I forget
+what I saw in that bed.
+
+* * * * *
+
+I found a letter on the table; and I came away, locking the door
+behind me, and took the lovely prattling orphans home. I could but
+shake my head and weep, as I gave them to the care of Mrs
+Balwhidder, and she was terrified but said nothing. I then read the
+letter. It was to send the bairns to a gentleman, their uncle, in
+London. Oh! it is a terrible tale; but the winding-sheet and the
+earth is over it. I sent for two of my elders. I related what I
+had seen. Two coffins were got, and the bodies laid in them; and
+the next day, with one of the fatherless bairns in each hand, I
+followed them to the grave, which was dug in that part of the
+kirkyard where unchristened babies are laid. We durst not take it
+upon us to do more; but few knew the reason, and some thought it was
+because the deceased were strangers, and had no regular lair.
+
+I dressed the two bonny orphans in the best mourning at my own cost,
+and kept them in the manse till we could get an answer from their
+uncle, to whom I sent their father's letter. It stung him to the
+quick, and he came down all the way from London, and took the
+children away himself. Oh! he was a vexed man when the beautiful
+bairns, on being told he was their uncle, ran into his arms, and
+complained that their papa and mamma had slept so long, that they
+would never waken.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER L YEAR 1809
+
+
+
+As I come towards the events of these latter days, I am surprised to
+find myself not at all so distinct in my recollection of them as in
+those of the first of my ministry; being apt to confound the things
+of one occasion with those of another, which Mrs Balwhidder says is
+an admonishment to me to leave off my writing. But, please God, I
+will endeavour to fulfil this as I have through life tried, to the
+best of my capacity, to do every other duty; and, with the help of
+Mrs Balwhidder, who has a very clear understanding, I think I may
+get through my task in a creditable manner, which is all I aspire
+after; not writing for a vain world, but only to testify to
+posterity anent the great changes that have happened in my day and
+generation--a period which all the best-informed writers say, has
+not had its match in the history of the world since the beginning of
+time.
+
+By the failure of the cotton-mill company, whose affairs were not
+settled till the spring of this year, there was great suffering
+during the winter; but my people, those that still adhered to the
+establishment, bore their share of the dispensation with meekness
+and patience, nor was there wanting edifying monuments of
+resignation even among the stravaigers.
+
+On the day that the Canaille Meeting-house was opened, which was in
+the summer, I was smitten to the heart to see the empty seats that
+were in my kirk; for all the thoughtless, and some that I had a
+better opinion of, went to hear the opening discourse. Satan that
+day had power given to him to buffet me as he did Job of old; and
+when I looked around and saw the empty seats, my corruption rose,
+and I forgot myself in the remembering prayer; for when I prayed for
+all denominations of Christians, and worshippers, and infidels, I
+could not speak of the schismatics with patience, but entreated the
+Lord to do with the hobleshow at Cayenneville, as he saw meet in his
+displeasure, the which, when I came afterwards to think upon, I
+grieved at with a sore contrition.
+
+In the course of the week following, the elders, in a body, came to
+me in the manse, and after much commendation of my godly ministry,
+they said, that seeing I was now growing old, they thought they
+could not testify their respect for me in a better manner than by
+agreeing to get me a helper. But I would not at that time listen to
+such a proposal, for I felt no falling off in my powers of
+preaching; on the contrary, I found myself growing better at it, as
+I was enabled to hold forth, in an easy manner, often a whole half
+hour longer, than I could do a dozen years before. Therefore
+nothing was done in this year anent my resignation; but during the
+winter, Mrs Balwhidder was often grieved, in the bad weather, that I
+should preach, and, in short, so worked upon my affections, that I
+began to think it was fitting for me to comply with the advice of my
+friends. Accordingly, in the course of the winter, the elders began
+to cast about for a helper; and during the bleak weather in the
+ensuing spring, several young men spared me from the necessity of
+preaching. But this relates to the concerns of the next and last
+year of my ministry. So I will now proceed to give an account of
+it, very thankful that I have been permitted, in unmolested
+tranquillity, to bring my history to such a point.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LI YEAR 1810
+
+
+
+My tasks are all near a close; and in writing this final record of
+my ministry, the very sound of my pen admonishes me that my life is
+a burden on the back of flying Time, that he will soon be obliged to
+lay down in his great storehouse--the grave. Old age has, indeed,
+long warned me to prepare for rest; and the darkened windows of my
+sight show that the night is coming on, while deafness, like a door
+fast barred, has shut out all the pleasant sounds of this world, and
+inclosed me, as it were, in a prison, even from the voices of my
+friends.
+
+I have lived longer than the common lot of man, and I have seen, in
+my time, many mutations and turnings, and ups and downs,
+notwithstanding the great spread that has been in our national
+prosperity. I have beheld them that were flourishing like the green
+bay-trees, made desolate, and their branches scattered. But, in my
+own estate, I have had a large and liberal experience of goodness.
+
+At the beginning of my ministry I was reviled and rejected; but my
+honest endeavours to prove a faithful shepherd were blessed from on
+high, and rewarded with the affection of my flock. Perhaps, in the
+vanity of doting old age, I thought in this there was a merit due to
+myself, which made the Lord to send the chastisement of the Canaille
+schism among my people; for I was then wroth without judgment, and
+by my heat hastened into an open division the flaw that a more
+considerate manner might have healed. But I confess my fault, and
+submit my cheek to the smiter; and now I see that the finger of
+Wisdom was in that probation, and it was far better that the weavers
+meddled with the things of God, which they could not change, than
+with those of the King, which they could only harm. In that matter,
+however, I was like our gracious monarch in the American war; for
+though I thereby lost the pastoral allegiance of a portion of my
+people, in like manner as he did of his American subjects, yet,
+after the separation, I was enabled so to deport myself, that they
+showed me many voluntary testimonies of affectionate respect, and
+which it would be a vain glory in me to rehearse here. One thing I
+must record, because it is as much to their honour as it is to mine.
+
+When it was known that I was to preach my last sermon, every one of
+those who had been my hearers, and who had seceded to the Canaille
+meeting, made it a point that day to be in the parish kirk, and to
+stand in the crowd, that made a lane of reverence for me to pass
+from the kirk-door to the back-yett of the manse. And shortly
+after, a deputation of all their brethren, with their minister at
+their head, came to me one morning, and presented to me a server of
+silver, in token, as they were pleased to say, of their esteem for
+my blameless life, and the charity that I had practised towards the
+poor of all sects in the neighbourhood; which is set forth in a
+well-penned inscription, written by a weaver lad that works for his
+daily bread. Such a thing would have been a prodigy at the
+beginning of my ministry; but the progress of book-learning and
+education has been wonderful since, and with it has come a spirit of
+greater liberality than the world knew before, bringing men of
+adverse principles and doctrines into a more humane communion with
+each other; showing that it's by the mollifying influence of
+knowledge the time will come to pass, when the tiger of papistry
+shall lie down with the lamb of reformation, and the vultures of
+prelacy be as harmless as the presbyterian doves; when the
+independent, the anabaptist, and every other order and denomination
+of Christians, not forgetting even those poor wee wrens of the Lord,
+the burghers and anti-burghers, who will pick from the hand of
+patronage, and dread no snare.
+
+On the next Sunday, after my farewell discourse, I took the arm of
+Mrs Balwhidder, and with my cane in my hand, walked to our own pew,
+where I sat some time; but, owing to my deafness, not being able to
+hear, I have not since gone back to the church. But my people are
+fond of having their weans still christened by me, and the young
+folk, such as are of a serious turn, come to be married at my hands,
+believing, as they say, that there is something good in the blessing
+of an aged gospel minister. But even this remnant of my gown I must
+lay aside; for Mrs Balwhidder is now and then obliged to stop me in
+my prayers, as I sometimes wander--pronouncing the baptismal
+blessing upon a bride and bridegroom, talking as if they were
+already parents. I am thankful, however, that I have been spared
+with a sound mind to write this book to the end; but it is my last
+task, and, indeed, really I have no more to say, saving only to wish
+a blessing on all people from on high, where I soon hope to be, and
+to meet there all the old and long-departed sheep of my flock,
+especially the first and second Mrs Balwhidders.
+
+
+
+Footnotes:
+
+{1} Dreghorn, Ayrshire, two miles from Irvine.
+
+{2} Irvine, Ayrshire.
+
+{3} Cognac.
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg's Etext of The Annals of the Parish by John Galt
+
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