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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Annals of the Parish, by John Galt,
+Illustrated by Henry W. Kerr
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
+other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
+whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
+the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
+www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
+to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
+
+
+
+
+Title: Annals of the Parish
+
+
+Author: John Galt
+
+
+
+Release Date: May 13, 2015 [eBook #1310]
+[This file was first posted in April 18, 1998]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: UTF-8
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ANNALS OF THE PARISH***
+
+
+Transcribed from the 1910 T. N. Foulis edition by David Price, email
+ccx074@pglaf.org
+
+ [Picture: Book cover]
+
+ [Picture: The Loupin’-on Stane]
+
+
+
+
+
+ ANNALS OF
+ THE PARISH
+
+
+ OR THE CHRONICLE OF DAL-
+ MAILING DURING THE MINISTRY
+ OF THE REV. MICAH BALWHID-
+ DER. WRITTEN BY HIMSELF
+ AND ARRANGED AND EDITED BY
+ JOHN GALT
+ ILLUSTRATED IN COLOUR BY
+ HENRY W. KERR, R.S.A.
+
+ [Picture: Decorative graphic]
+
+ T.N.FOULIS
+ London & Edinburgh
+ 1 9 1 0
+
+ * * * * *
+
+ _September_ 1910
+
+ * * * * *
+
+ _Printed by Turnbull & Spears_, _Edinburgh_
+
+
+
+
+INTRODUCTION
+
+
+IN the same year, and on the same day of the same month, that his Sacred
+Majesty King George, the third of the name, came to his crown and
+kingdom, I was placed and settled as the minister of Dalmailing. {1}
+When about a week thereafter this was known in the parish, it was thought
+a wonderful thing, and everybody spoke of me and the new king as united
+in our trusts and temporalities, marvelling how the same should come to
+pass, and thinking the hand of Providence was in it, and that surely we
+were preordained to fade and flourish in fellowship together; which has
+really been the case: for in the same season that his Most Excellent
+Majesty, as he was very properly styled in the proclamations for the
+general fasts and thanksgivings, was set by as a precious vessel which
+had received a crack or a flaw, and could only be serviceable in the way
+of an ornament, I was obliged, by reason of age and the growing
+infirmities of my recollection, to consent to the earnest entreaties of
+the Session, and to accept of Mr. Amos to be my helper. I was long
+reluctant to do so; but the great respect that my people had for me, and
+the love that I bore towards them, over and above the sign that was given
+to me in the removal of the royal candle-stick from its place, worked
+upon my heart and understanding, and I could not stand out. So, on the
+last Sabbath of the year 1810, I preached my last sermon, and it was a
+moving discourse. There were few dry eyes in the kirk that day; for I
+had been with the aged from the beginning—the young considered me as
+their natural pastor—and my bidding them all farewell was, as when of old
+among the heathen, an idol was taken away by the hands of the enemy.
+
+At the close of the worship, and before the blessing, I addressed them in
+a fatherly manner; and, although the kirk was fuller than ever I saw it
+before, the fall of a pin might have been heard—at the conclusion there
+was a sobbing and much sorrow. I said,
+
+“My dear friends, I have now finished my work among you for ever. I have
+often spoken to you from this place the words of truth and holiness; and,
+had it been in poor frail human nature to practise the advice and
+counselling that I have given in this pulpit to you, there would not need
+to be any cause for sorrow on this occasion—the close and latter end of
+my ministry. But, nevertheless, I have no reason to complain; and it
+will be my duty to testify, in that place where I hope we are all one day
+to meet again, that I found you a docile and a tractable flock, far more
+than at first I could have expected. There are among you still a few,
+but with grey heads and feeble hands now, that can remember the great
+opposition that was made to my placing, and the stout part they
+themselves took in the burly, because I was appointed by the patron; but
+they have lived to see the error of their way, and to know that preaching
+is the smallest portion of the duties of a faithful minister. I may not,
+my dear friends, have applied my talent in the pulpit so effectually as
+perhaps I might have done, considering the gifts that it pleased God to
+give me in that way, and the education that I had in the Orthodox
+University of Glasgow, as it was in the time of my youth; nor can I say
+that, in the works of peace-making and charity, I have done all that I
+should have done. But I have done my best, studying no interest but the
+good that was to rise according to the faith in Christ Jesus.
+
+“To my young friends I would, as a parting word, say, look to the lives
+and conversation of your parents—they were plain, honest, and devout
+Christians, fearing God and honouring the King. They believed the Bible
+was the word of God; and, when they practised its precepts, they found,
+by the good that came from them, that it was truly so. They bore in mind
+the tribulation and persecution of their forefathers for righteousness’
+sake, and were thankful for the quiet and protection of the government in
+their day and generation. Their land was tilled with industry, and they
+ate the bread of carefulness with a contented spirit, and, verily, they
+had the reward of well-doing even in this world; for they beheld on all
+sides the blessing of God upon the nation, and the tree growing, and the
+plough going where the banner of the oppressor was planted of old, and
+the war-horse trampled in the blood of martyrs. Reflect on this, my
+young friends, and know, that the best part of a Christian’s duty in this
+world of much evil, is to thole and suffer with resignation, as lang as
+it is possible for human nature to do. I do not counsel passive
+obedience: that is a doctrine that the Church of Scotland can never
+abide; but the divine right of resistance, which, in the days of her
+trouble, she so bravely asserted against popish and prelatic usurpations,
+was never resorted to till the attempt was made to remove the ark of the
+tabernacle from her. I therefore counsel you, my young friends, not to
+lend your ears to those that trumpet forth their hypothetical politics;
+but to believe that the laws of the land are administered with a good
+intent, till in your own homes and dwellings ye feel the presence of the
+oppressor—then, and not till then, are ye free to gird your loins for
+battle—and woe to him, and woe to the land where that is come to, if the
+sword be sheathed till the wrong be redressed.
+
+“As for you, my old companions, many changes have we seen in our day; but
+the change that we ourselves are soon to undergo will be the greatest of
+all. We have seen our bairns grow to manhood—we have seen the beauty of
+youth pass away—we have felt our backs become unable for the burthen, and
+our right hand forget its cunning.—Our eyes have become dim, and our
+heads grey—we are now tottering with short and feckless steps towards the
+grave; and some, that should have been here this day, are bed-rid, lying,
+as it were, at the gates of death, like Lazarus at the threshold of the
+rich man’s door, full of ails and sores, and having no enjoyment but in
+the hope that is in hereafter. What can I say to you but farewell! Our
+work is done—we are weary and worn out, and in need of rest—may the rest
+of the blessed be our portion!—and in the sleep that all must sleep,
+beneath the cold blanket of the kirkyard grass, and on that clay pillow
+where we must shortly lay our heads, may we have pleasant dreams, till we
+are awakened to partake of the everlasting banquet of the saints in
+glory!”
+
+When I had finished, there was for some time a great solemnity throughout
+the kirk; and, before giving the blessing, I sat down to compose myself,
+for my heart was big, and my spirit oppressed with sadness.
+
+As I left the pulpit, all the elders stood on the steps to hand me down,
+and the tear was in every eye, and they helped me into the session-house;
+but I could not speak to them, nor them to me. Then Mr. Dalziel, who was
+always a composed and sedate man, said a few words of prayer, and I was
+comforted therewith, and rose to go home to the manse; but in the
+churchyard all the congregation was assembled, young and old, and they
+made a lane for me to the back-yett that opened into the
+manse-garden—Some of them put out their hands and touched me as I passed,
+followed by the elders, and some of them wept. It was as if I was
+passing away, and to be no more—verily, it was the reward of my
+ministry—a faithful account of which, year by year, I now sit down, in
+the evening of my days, to make up, to the end that I may bear witness to
+the work of a beneficent Providence, even in the narrow sphere of my
+parish, and the concerns of that flock of which it was His most gracious
+pleasure to make me the unworthy shepherd.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I
+YEAR 1760
+
+
+THE Anno Domini one thousand seven hundred and sixty, was remarkable for
+three things in the parish of Dalmailing.—First and foremost, there was
+my placing; then the coming of Mrs. Malcolm with her five children to
+settle among us; and next, my marriage upon my own cousin, Miss Betty
+Lanshaw, by which the account of this year naturally divides itself into
+three heads or portions.
+
+First, of the placing.—It was a great affair; for I was put in by the
+patron, and the people knew nothing whatsoever of me, and their hearts
+were stirred into strife on the occasion, and they did all that lay
+within the compass of their power to keep me out, insomuch, that there
+was obliged to be a guard of soldiers to protect the presbytery; and it
+was a thing that made my heart grieve when I heard the drum beating and
+the fife playing as we were going to the kirk. The people were really
+mad and vicious, and flung dirt upon us as we passed, and reviled us all,
+and held out the finger of scorn at me; but I endured it with a resigned
+spirit, compassionating their wilfulness and blindness. Poor old Mr.
+Kilfuddy of the Braehill got such a clash of glar on the side of his
+face, that his eye was almost extinguished.
+
+When we got to the kirk door, it was found to be nailed up, so as by no
+possibility to be opened. The sergeant of the soldiers wanted to break
+it, but I was afraid that the heritors would grudge and complain of the
+expense of a new door, and I supplicated him to let it be as it was: we
+were, therefore, obligated to go in by a window, and the crowd followed
+us in the most unreverent manner, making the Lord’s house like an inn on
+a fair day, with their grievous yellyhooing. During the time of the
+psalm and the sermon, they behaved themselves better, but when the
+induction came on, their clamour was dreadful; and Thomas Thorl, the
+weaver, a pious zealot in that time, he got up and protested, and said,
+“Verily, verily, I say unto you, he that entereth not by the door into
+the sheepfold, but climbeth up some other way, the same is a thief and a
+robber.” And I thought I would have a hard and sore time of it with such
+an outstrapolous people. Mr. Given, that was then the minister of
+Lugton, was a jocose man, and would have his joke even at a solemnity.
+When the laying of the hands upon me was adoing, he could not get near
+enough to put on his, but he stretched out his staff and touched my head,
+and said, to the great diversion of the rest, “This will do well enough,
+timber to timber;” but it was an unfriendly saying of Mr. Given,
+considering the time and the place, and the temper of my people.
+
+ [Picture: The Souter]
+
+After the ceremony, we then got out at the window, and it was a heavy day
+to me; but we went to the manse, and there we had an excellent dinner,
+which Mrs. Watts of the new inns of Irville {9} prepared at my request,
+and sent her chaise-driver to serve, for he was likewise her waiter, she
+having then but one chaise, and that no often called for.
+
+But, although my people received me in this unruly manner, I was resolved
+to cultivate civility among them, and therefore, the very next morning I
+began a round of visitations; but, oh! it was a steep brae that I had to
+climb, and it needed a stout heart. For I found the doors in some places
+barred against me; in others, the bairns, when they saw me coming, ran
+crying to their mothers, “Here’s the feckless Mess-John!” and then, when
+I went into the houses, their parents wouldna ask me to sit down, but
+with a scornful way, said, “Honest man, what’s your pleasure here?”
+Nevertheless, I walked about from door to door like a dejected beggar,
+till I got the almous deed of a civil reception—and who would have
+thought it?—from no less a person than the same Thomas Thorl that was so
+bitter against me in the kirk on the foregoing day.
+
+Thomas was standing at the door with his green duffle apron, and his red
+Kilmarnock nightcap—I mind him as well as if it was but yesterday—and he
+had seen me going from house to house, and in what manner I was rejected,
+and his bowels were moved, and he said to me in a kind manner, “Come in,
+sir, and ease yoursel’: this will never do, the clergy are God’s gorbies,
+and for their Master’s sake it behoves us to respect them. There was no
+ane in the whole parish mair against you than mysel’; but this early
+visitation is a symptom of grace that I couldna have expectit from a bird
+out the nest of patronage.” I thanked Thomas, and went in with him, and
+we had some solid conversation together, and I told him that it was not
+so much the pastor’s duty to feed the flock, as to herd them well; and
+that, although there might be some abler with the head than me, there
+wasna a he within the bounds of Scotland more willing to watch the fold
+by night and by day. And Thomas said he had not heard a mair sound
+observe for some time, and that, if I held to that doctrine in the
+poopit, it wouldna be lang till I would work a change.—“I was mindit,”
+quoth he, “never to set my foot within the kirk door while you were
+there; but to testify, and no to condemn without a trial, I’ll be there
+next Lord’s day, and egg my neighbours to be likewise, so ye’ll no have
+to preach just to the bare walls and the laird’s family.”
+
+I have now to speak of the coming of Mrs. Malcolm.—She was the widow of a
+Clyde shipmaster, that was lost at sea with his vessel. She was a genty
+body, calm and methodical. From morning to night she sat at her wheel,
+spinning the finest lint, which suited well with her pale hands. She
+never changed her widow’s weeds, and she was aye as if she had just been
+ta’en out of a bandbox. The tear was aften in her e’e when the bairns
+were at the school; but when they came home, her spirit was lighted up
+with gladness, although, poor woman, she had many a time very little to
+give them. They were, however, wonderful well-bred things, and took with
+thankfulness whatever she set before them; for they knew that their
+father, the breadwinner, was away, and that she had to work sore for
+their bit and drap. I dare say, the only vexation that ever she had from
+any of them, on their own account, was when Charlie, the eldest laddie,
+had won fourpence at pitch-and-toss at the school, which he brought home
+with a proud heart to his mother. I happened to be daunrin’ by at the
+time, and just looked in at the door to say gude-night: it was a sad
+sight. There was she sitting with the silent tear on her cheek, and
+Charlie greeting as if he had done a great fault, and the other four
+looking on with sorrowful faces. Never, I am sure, did Charlie Malcolm
+gamble after that night.
+
+I often wondered what brought Mrs. Malcolm to our clachan, instead of
+going to a populous town, where she might have taken up a huxtry-shop, as
+she was but of a silly constitution, the which would have been better for
+her than spinning from morning to far in the night, as if she was in
+verity drawing the thread of life. But it was, no doubt, from an honest
+pride to hide her poverty; for when her daughter Effie was ill with the
+measles—the poor lassie was very ill—nobody thought she could come
+through, and when she did get the turn, she was for many a day a heavy
+handful;—our session being rich, and nobody on it but cripple Tammy
+Daidles, that was at that time known through all the country side for
+begging on a horse, I thought it my duty to call upon Mrs. Malcolm in a
+sympathising way, and offer her some assistance, but she refused it.
+
+“No, sir,” said she, “I canna take help from the poor’s-box, although
+it’s very true that I am in great need; for it might hereafter be cast up
+to my bairns, whom it may please God to restore to better circumstances
+when I am no to see’t; but I would fain borrow five pounds, and if, sir,
+you will write to Mr. Maitland, that is now the Lord Provost of Glasgow,
+and tell him that Marion Shaw would be obliged to him for the lend of
+that soom, I think he will not fail to send it.”
+
+I wrote the letter that night to Provost Maitland, and, by the retour of
+the post, I got an answer, with twenty pounds for Mrs. Malcolm, saying,
+“That it was with sorrow he heard so small a trifle could be
+serviceable.” When I took the letter and the money, which was in a
+bank-bill, she said, “This is just like himsel’.” She then told me that
+Mr. Maitland had been a gentleman’s son of the east country, but driven
+out of his father’s house, when a laddie, by his stepmother; and that he
+had served as a servant lad with her father, who was the Laird of
+Yillcogie, but ran through his estate, and left her, his only daughter,
+in little better than beggary with her auntie, the mother of Captain
+Malcolm, her husband that was. Provost Maitland in his servitude had
+ta’en a notion of her; and when he recovered his patrimony, and had
+become a great Glasgow merchant, on hearing how she was left by her
+father, he offered to marry her, but she had promised herself to her
+cousin the captain, whose widow she was. He then married a rich lady,
+and in time grew, as he was, Lord Provost of the city; but his letter
+with the twenty pounds to me, showed that he had not forgotten his first
+love. It was a short, but a well-written letter, in a fair hand of
+write, containing much of the true gentleman; and Mrs. Malcolm said, “Who
+knows but out of the regard he once had for their mother, he may do
+something for my five helpless orphans.”
+
+Thirdly, Upon the subject of taking my cousin, Miss Betty Lanshaw, for my
+first wife, I have little to say.—It was more out of a compassionate
+habitual affection, than the passion of love. We were brought up by our
+grandmother in the same house, and it was a thing spoken of from the
+beginning, that Betty and me were to be married. So, when she heard that
+the Laird of Breadland had given me the presentation of Dalmailing, she
+began to prepare for the wedding; and as soon as the placing was well
+over, and the manse in order, I gaed to Ayr, where she was, and we were
+quietly married, and came home in a chaise, bringing with us her little
+brother Andrew, that died in the East Indies, and he lived and was
+brought up by us.
+
+Now, this is all, I think, that happened in that year worthy of being
+mentioned, except that at the sacrament, when old Mr. Kilfuddy was
+preaching in the tent, it came on such a thunder-plump, that there was
+not a single soul stayed in the kirkyard to hear him; for the which he
+was greatly mortified, and never after came to our preachings.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II
+YEAR 1761
+
+
+IT was in this year that the great smuggling trade corrupted all the west
+coast, especially the laigh lands about the Troon and the Loans. The tea
+was going like the chaff, the brandy like well-water, and the wastrie of
+all things was terrible. There was nothing minded but the riding of
+cadgers by day, and excisemen by night—and battles between the smugglers
+and the king’s men, both by sea and land. There was a continual
+drunkenness and debauchery; and our session, that was but on the lip of
+this whirlpool of iniquity, had an awful time o’t. I did all that was in
+the power of nature to keep my people from the contagion: I preached
+sixteen times from the text, “Render to Cæsar the things that are
+Cæsar’s.” I visited, and I exhorted; I warned, and I prophesied; I told
+them that, although the money came in like sclate stones, it would go
+like the snow off the dyke. But for all I could do, the evil got in
+among us, and we had no less than three contested bastard bairns upon our
+hands at one time, which was a thing never heard of in a parish of the
+shire of Ayr since the Reformation. Two of the bairns, after no small
+sifting and searching, we got fathered at last; but the third, that was
+by Meg Glaiks, and given to one Rab Rickerton, was utterly refused,
+though the fact was not denied; but he was a termagant fellow, and
+snappit his fingers at the elders. The next day he listed in the Scotch
+Greys, who were then quartered at Ayr, and we never heard more of him,
+but thought he had been slain in battle, till one of the parish, about
+three years since, went up to London to lift a legacy from a cousin that
+died among the Hindoos. When he was walking about, seeing the
+curiosities, and among others Chelsea Hospital, he happened to speak to
+some of the invalids, who found out from his tongue that he was a
+Scotchman; and speaking to the invalids, one of them, a very old man,
+with a grey head and a leg of timber, inquired what part of Scotland he
+was come from; and when he mentioned my parish, the invalid gave a great
+shout, and said he was from the same place himself; and who should this
+old man be, but the very identical Rab Rickerton, that was art and part
+in Meg Glaiks’ disowned bairn. Then they had a long converse together,
+and he had come through many hardships, but had turned out a good
+soldier; and so, in his old days, was an indoor pensioner, and very
+comfortable; and he said that he had, to be sure, spent his youth in the
+devil’s service, and his manhood in the king’s, but his old age was given
+to that of his Maker, which I was blithe and thankful to hear; and he
+enquired about many a one in the parish, the blooming and the green of
+his time, but they were all dead and buried; and he had a contrite and
+penitent spirit, and read his Bible every day, delighting most in the
+Book of Joshua, the Chronicles, and the Kings.
+
+Before this year, the drinking of tea was little known in the parish,
+saving among a few of the heritors’ houses on a Sabbath evening; but now
+it became very rife: yet the commoner sort did not like to let it be
+known that they were taking to the new luxury, especially the elderly
+women, who, for that reason, had their ploys in out-houses and by-places,
+just as the witches lang syne had their sinful possets and
+galravitchings; and they made their tea for common in the pint-stoup, and
+drank it out of caps and luggies, for there were but few among them that
+had cups and saucers. Well do I remember one night in harvest, in this
+very year, as I was taking my twilight dauner aneath the hedge along the
+back side of Thomas Thorl’s yard, meditating on the goodness of
+Providence, and looking at the sheaves of victual on the field, that I
+heard his wife, and two three other carlins, with their Bohea in the
+inside of the hedge, and no doubt but it had a lacing of the conek, {17}
+for they were all cracking like pen-guns. But I gave them a sign, by a
+loud host, that Providence sees all, and it skailed the bike; for I heard
+them, like guilty creatures, whispering, and gathering up their
+truck-pots and trenchers, and cowering away home.
+
+It was in this year that Patrick Dilworth (he had been schoolmaster of
+the parish from the time, as his wife said, of Anna Regina, and before
+the Rexes came to the crown), was disabled by a paralytic, and the
+heritors, grudging the cost of another schoolmaster as long as he lived,
+would not allow the session to get his place supplied, which was a wrong
+thing, I must say, of them; for the children of the parishioners were
+obliged, therefore, to go to the neighbouring towns for their schooling,
+and the custom was to take a piece of bread and cheese in their pockets
+for dinner, and to return in the evening always voracious for more, the
+long walk helping the natural crave of their young appetites. In this
+way Mrs. Malcolm’s two eldest laddies, Charlie and Robert, were wont to
+go to Irville, and it was soon seen that they kept themselves aloof from
+the other callans in the clachan, and had a genteeler turn than the
+grulshy bairns of the cottars. Her bit lassies, Kate and Effie, were
+better off; for some years before, Nanse Banks had taken up a teaching in
+a garret-room of a house, at the corner where John Bayne has biggit the
+sclate-house for his grocery-shop. Nanse learnt them reading and working
+stockings, and how to sew the semplar, for twal-pennies a-week. She was
+a patient creature, well cut out for her calling, with blear een, a pale
+face, and a long neck, but meek and contented withal, tholing the dule of
+this world with a Christian submission of the spirit; and her garret-room
+was a cordial of cleanliness, for she made the scholars set the house in
+order, time and time about, every morning; and it was a common remark for
+many a day, that the lassies, who had been at Nanse Banks’s school, were
+always well spoken of, both for their civility, and the trigness of their
+houses when they were afterwards married. In short, I do not know, that
+in all the long epoch of my ministry, any individual body did more to
+improve the ways of the parishioners, in their domestic concerns, than
+did that worthy and innocent creature, Nanse Banks, the schoolmistress;
+and she was a great loss when she was removed, as it is to be hoped, to a
+better world; but anent this I shall have to speak more at large
+hereafter.
+
+It was in this year that my patron, the Laird of Breadland, departed this
+life, and I preached his funeral sermon; but he was non-beloved in the
+parish; for my people never forgave him for putting me upon them,
+although they began to be more on a familiar footing with myself. This
+was partly owing to my first wife, Betty Lanshaw, who was an active
+throughgoing woman, and wonderfu’ useful to many of the cottars’ wives at
+their lying-in; and when a death happened among them, her helping hand,
+and any thing we had at the manse, was never wanting; and I went about
+myself to the bedsides of the frail, leaving no stone unturned to win the
+affections of my people, which, by the blessing of the Lord, in process
+of time, was brought to a bearing.
+
+But a thing happened in this year, which deserves to be recorded, as
+manifesting what effect the smuggling was beginning to take in the morals
+of the country side. One Mr. Macskipnish, of Highland parentage, who had
+been a valet-de-chambre with a major in the campaigns, and taken a
+prisoner with him by the French, he having come home in a cartel, took up
+a dancing-school at Irville, the which art he had learnt in the
+genteelest fashion, in the mode of Paris, at the French court. Such a
+thing as a dancing-school had never, in the memory of man, been known in
+our country side; and there was such a sound about the steps and
+cottillions of Mr. Macskipnish, that every lad and lass, that could spare
+time and siller, went to him, to the great neglect of their work. The
+very bairns on the loan, instead of their wonted play, gaed linking and
+louping in the steps of Mr. Macskipnish, who was, to be sure, a great
+curiosity, with long spindle legs, his breast shot out like a duck’s, and
+his head powdered and frizzled up like a tappit-hen. He was, indeed, the
+proudest peacock that could be seen, and he had a ring on his finger, and
+when he came to drink his tea at the Breadland, he brought no hat on his
+head, but a droll cockit thing under his arm, which, he said, was after
+the manner of the courtiers at the petty suppers of one Madam Pompadour,
+who was at that time the concubine of the French king.
+
+I do not recollect any other remarkable thing that happened in this year.
+The harvest was very abundant, and the meal so cheap, that it caused a
+great defect in my stipend; so that I was obligated to postpone the
+purchase of a mahogany scrutoire for my study, as I had intended. But I
+had not the heart to complain of this: on the contrary, I rejoiced
+thereat; for what made me want my scrutoire till another year, had
+carried blitheness into the hearth of the cottar, and made the widow’s
+heart sing with joy; and I would have been an unnatural creature, had I
+not joined in the universal gladness, because plenty did abound.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III
+YEAR 1762
+
+
+THE third year of my ministry was long held in remembrance for several
+very memorable things. William Byres of the Loanhead had a cow that
+calved two calves at one calving; Mrs. Byres, the same year, had twins,
+male and female; and there was such a crop on his fields, testifying that
+the Lord never sends a mouth into the world without providing meat for
+it. But what was thought a very daunting sign of something, happened on
+the Sacrament Sabbath at the conclusion of the action sermon, when I had
+made a very suitable discourse. The day was tempestuous, and the wind
+blew with such a pith and birr, that I thought it would have twirled the
+trees in the kirkyard out by the roots, and, blowing in this manner, it
+tirled the thack from the rigging of the manse stable; and the same blast
+that did that, took down the lead that was on the kirk-roof, which hurled
+off, as I was saying, at the conclusion of the action sermon, with such a
+dreadful sound, as the like was never heard, and all the congregation
+thought that it betokened a mutation to me. However, nothing particular
+happened to me; but the smallpox came in among the weans of the parish,
+and the smashing that it made of the poor bits o’ bairns was indeed
+woeful.
+
+One Sabbath, when the pestilence was raging, I preached a sermon about
+Rachel weeping for her children, which Thomas Thorl, who was surely a
+great judge of good preaching, said, “was a monument of divinity whilk
+searched the heart of many a parent that day;” a thing I was well pleased
+to hear, for Thomas, as I have related at length, was the most zealous
+champion against my getting the parish; but, from this time, I set him
+down in my mind for the next vacancy among the elders. Worthy man! it
+was not permitted him to arrive at that honour. In the fall of that year
+he took an income in his legs, and couldna go about, and was laid up for
+the remainder of his days, a perfect Lazarus, by the fire-side. But he
+was well supported in his affliction. In due season, when it pleased Him
+that alone can give and take, to pluck him from this life, as the fruit
+ripened and ready for the gathering, his death, to all that knew him, was
+a gentle dispensation, for truly he had been in sore trouble.
+
+It was in this year that Charlie Malcolm, Mrs. Malcolm’s eldest son, was
+sent to be a cabin-boy in the Tobacco trader, a three-masted ship, that
+sailed between Port-Glasgow and Virginia in America. She was commanded
+by Captain Dickie, an Irville man; for at that time the Clyde was
+supplied with the best sailors from our coast, the coal-trade with
+Ireland being a better trade for bringing up good mariners than the long
+voyages in the open sea; which was the reason, as I often heard said, why
+the Clyde shipping got so many of their men from our country side. The
+going to sea of Charlie Malcolm was, on divers accounts, a very
+remarkable thing to us all; for he was the first that ever went from our
+parish, in the memory of man, to be a sailor, and everybody was concerned
+at it, and some thought it was a great venture of his mother to let him,
+his father having been lost at sea. But what could the forlorn widow do?
+She had five weans, and little to give them; and, as she herself said, he
+was aye in the hand of his Maker, go where he might; and the will of God
+would be done, in spite of all earthly wiles and devices to the contrary.
+
+ [Picture: Preparing for the Kirk]
+
+On the Monday morning, when Charlie was to go away to meet the Irville
+carrier on the road, we were all up, and I walked by myself from the
+manse into the clachan to bid him farewell, and I met him just coming
+from his mother’s door, as blithe as a bee, in his sailor’s dress, with a
+stick, and a bundle tied in a Barcelona silk handkerchief hanging o’er
+his shoulder, and his two little brothers were with him, and his sisters,
+Kate and Effie, looking out from the door all begreeten; but his mother
+was in the house, praying to the Lord to protect her orphan, as she
+afterwards told me. All the weans of the clachan were gathered at the
+kirkyard yett to see him pass, and they gave him three great shouts as he
+was going by; and everybody was at their doors, and said something
+encouraging to him; but there was a great laugh when auld Mizy Spaewell
+came hirpling with her bauchle in her hand, and flung it after him for
+good-luck. Mizy had a wonderful faith in freats, and was just an oracle
+of sagacity at expounding dreams, and bodes of every sort and
+description—besides, she was reckoned one of the best howdies in her day;
+but by this time she was grown frail and feckless, and she died the same
+year on Hallowe’en, which made everybody wonder that it should have so
+fallen out for her to die on Hallowe’en.
+
+Shortly after the departure of Charlie Malcolm, the Lady of Breadland,
+with her three daughters, removed to Edinburgh, where the young laird,
+that had been my pupil, was learning to be an advocate, and the
+Breadland-house was set to Major Gilchrist, a nabob from India; but he
+was a narrow ailing man, and his maiden-sister, Miss Girzie, was the
+scrimpetest creature that could be; so that, in their hands, all the
+pretty policy of the Breadlands, that had cost a power of money to the
+old laird that was my patron, fell into decay and disorder; and the bonny
+yew-trees that were cut into the shape of peacocks, soon grew out of all
+shape, and are now doleful monuments of the major’s tack, and that of
+Lady Skimmilk, as Miss Girzie Gilchrist, his sister, was nick-named by
+every ane that kent her.
+
+But it was not so much on account of the neglect of the Breadland, that
+the incoming of Major Gilchrist was to be deplored. The old men that had
+a light labour in keeping the policy in order, were thrown out of bread,
+and could do little; and the poor women that whiles got a bit and a drap
+from the kitchen of the family, soon felt the change, so that by little
+and little we were obligated to give help from the session; insomuch
+that, before the end of the year, I was necessitated to preach a
+discourse on almsgiving, specially for the benefit of our own poor, a
+thing never before known in the parish.
+
+But one good thing came from the Gilchrists to Mrs. Malcolm. Miss
+Girzie, whom they called Lady Skimmilk, had been in a very penurious way
+as a seamstress, in the Gorbals of Glasgow, while her brother was making
+the fortune in India, and she was a clever needle-woman—none better, as
+it was said; and she, having some things to make, took Kate Malcolm to
+help her in the coarse work; and Kate, being a nimble and birky thing,
+was so useful to the lady, and the complaining man the major, that they
+invited her to stay with them at the Breadland for the winter, where,
+although she was holden to her seam from morning to night, her food
+lightened the hand of her mother, who, for the first time since her
+coming into the parish, found the penny for the day’s darg more than was
+needed for the meal-basin; and the tea-drinking was beginning to spread
+more openly, insomuch that, by the advice of the first Mrs. Balwhidder,
+Mrs. Malcolm took in tea to sell, and in this way was enabled to eke
+something to the small profits of her wheel. Thus the tide that had been
+so long ebbing to her, began to turn; and here I am bound in truth to
+say, that although I never could abide the smuggling, both on its own
+account, and the evils that grew therefrom to the country side, I lost
+some of my dislike to the tea after Mrs. Malcolm began to traffic in it,
+and we then had it for our breakfast in the morning at the manse, as well
+as in the afternoon. But what I thought most of it for was, that it did
+no harm to the head of the drinkers, which was not always the case with
+the possets that were in fashion before. There is no meeting now in the
+summer evenings, as I remember often happened in my younger days, with
+decent ladies coming home with red faces, tosy and cosh, from a
+posset-masking; so, both for its temperance and on account of Mrs.
+Malcolm’s sale, I refrained from the November in this year to preach
+against tea; but I never lifted the weight of my displeasure from off the
+smuggling trade, until it was utterly put down by the strong hand of
+government.
+
+There was no other thing of note in this year, saving only that I planted
+in the garden the big pear-tree, which had the two great branches that we
+call the Adam and Eve. I got the plant, then a sapling, from Mr. Graft,
+that was Lord Eaglesham’s head-gardener; and he said it was, as indeed
+all the parish now knows well, a most juicy sweet pear, such as was not
+known in Scotland till my lord brought down the father plant from the
+king’s garden in London, in the forty-five when he went up to testify his
+loyalty to the House of Hanover.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV
+YEAR 1763
+
+
+THE An. Dom. 1763, was, in many a respect, a memorable year, both in
+public and in private. The King granted peace to the French, and Charlie
+Malcolm, that went to sea in the Tobacco trader, came home to see his
+mother. The ship, after being at America, had gone down to Jamaica, an
+island in the West Indies, with a cargo of live lumber, as Charlie told
+me himself, and had come home with more than a hundred and fifty hoggits
+of sugar, and sixty-three puncheons full of rum; for she was, by all
+accounts, a stately galley, and almost two hundred tons in the burthen,
+being the largest vessel then sailing from the creditable town of
+Port-Glasgow. Charlie was not expected; and his coming was a great thing
+to us all, so I will mention the whole particulars.
+
+One evening, towards the gloaming, as I was taking my walk of meditation,
+I saw a brisk sailor laddie coming towards me. He had a pretty green
+parrot sitting on a bundle, tied in a Barcelona silk handkerchief, which
+he carried with a stick over his shoulder, and in this bundle was a
+wonderful big nut, such as no one in our parish had ever seen. It was
+called a cocker-nut. This blithe callant was Charlie Malcolm, who had
+come all the way that day his leeful lane, on his own legs from Greenock,
+where the Tobacco trader was then ’livering her cargo. I told him how
+his mother, and his brothers, and his sisters were all in good health,
+and went to convoy him home; and as we were going along, he told me many
+curious things, and he gave me six beautiful yellow limes, that he had
+brought in his pouch all the way across the seas, for me to make a bowl
+of punch with, and I thought more of them than if they had been golden
+guineas, it was so mindful of the laddie.
+
+When we got to the door of his mother’s house, she was sitting at the
+fireside, with her three other bairns at their bread and milk, Kate being
+then with Lady Skimmilk, at the Breadland, sewing. It was between the
+day and dark, when the shuttle stands still till the lamp is lighted.
+But such a shout of joy and thankfulness as rose from that hearth, when
+Charlie went in! The very parrot, ye would have thought, was a
+participator, for the beast gied a skraik that made my whole head dirl;
+and the neighbours came flying and flocking to see what was the matter,
+for it was the first parrot ever seen within the bounds of the parish,
+and some thought it was but a foreign hawk, with a yellow head and green
+feathers.
+
+In the midst of all this, Effie Malcolm had run off to the Breadland for
+her sister Kate, and the two lassies came flying breathless, with Miss
+Girzie Gilchrist, the Lady Skimmilk, pursuing them like desperation, or a
+griffin, down the avenue; for Kate, in her hurry, had flung down her
+seam, a new printed gown, that she was helping to make, and it had fallen
+into a boyne of milk that was ready for the creaming, by which issued a
+double misfortune to Miss Girzie, the gown being not only ruined, but
+licking up the cream. For this, poor Kate was not allowed ever to set
+her face in the Breadland again.
+
+When Charlie Malcolm had stayed about a week with his mother, he returned
+to his berth in the Tobacco trader, and shortly after his brother Robert
+was likewise sent to serve his time to the sea, with an owner that was
+master of his own bark, in the coal trade at Irville. Kate, who was
+really a surprising lassie for her years, was taken off her mother’s
+hands by the old Lady Macadam, that lived in her jointure house, which is
+now the Cross Keys Inn. Her ladyship was a woman of high breeding, her
+husband having been a great general, and knighted by the king for his
+exploits; but she was lame, and could not move about in her dining-room
+without help; so hearing from the first Mrs. Balwhidder how Kate had done
+such an unatonable deed to Miss Girzie Gilchrist, she sent for Kate, and,
+finding her sharp and apt, she took her to live with her as a companion.
+This was a vast advantage, for the lady was versed in all manner of
+accomplishments, and could read and speak French with more ease than any
+professor at that time in the College of Glasgow; and she had learnt to
+sew flowers on satin, either in a nunnery abroad, or in a boarding-school
+in England, and took pleasure in teaching Kate all she knew, and how to
+behave herself like a lady.
+
+In the summer of this year, old Mr. Patrick Dilworth, that had so long
+been doited with the paralytics, died, and it was a great relief to my
+people, for the heritors could no longer refuse to get a proper
+schoolmaster; so we took on trial Mr. Lorimore, who has ever since the
+year after, with so much credit to himself, and usefulness to the parish,
+been schoolmaster, session clerk, and precentor—a man of great mildness
+and extraordinary particularity. He was then a very young man, and some
+objection was made, on account of his youth, to his being session-clerk,
+especially as the smuggling immorality still gave us much trouble in the
+making up of irregular marriages; but his discretion was greater than
+could have been hoped for from his years; and, after a twelvemonth’s
+probation in the capacity of schoolmaster, he was installed in all the
+offices that had belonged to his predecessor, old Mr. Patrick Dilworth
+that was.
+
+But the most memorable thing that befell among my people this year, was
+the burning of the lint-mill on the Lugton water, which happened, of all
+the days of the year, on the very selfsame day that Miss Girzie
+Gilchrist, better known as Lady Skimmilk, hired the chaise from Mrs.
+Watts of the New Inns of Irville, to go with her brother, the major, to
+consult the faculty in Edinburgh concerning his complaints. For, as the
+chaise was coming by the mill, William Huckle, the miller that was, came
+flying out of the mill like a demented man, crying fire!—and it was the
+driver that brought the melancholy tidings to the clachan—and melancholy
+they were; for the mill was utterly destroyed, and in it not a little of
+all that year’s crop of lint in our parish. The first Mrs. Balwhidder
+lost upwards of twelve stone, which we had raised on the glebe with no
+small pains, watering it in the drouth, as it was intended for sarking to
+ourselves, and sheets and napery. A great loss indeed it was, and the
+vexation thereof had a visible effect on Mrs. Balwhidder’s health, which
+from the spring had been in a dwining way. But for it, I think she might
+have wrestled through the winter: however, it was ordered otherwise, and
+she was removed from mine to Abraham’s bosom on Christmas-day, and buried
+on Hogmanay, for it was thought uncanny to have a dead corpse in the
+house on the new-year’s day. She was a worthy woman, studying with all
+her capacity to win the hearts of my people towards me—in the which good
+work she prospered greatly; so that, when she died, there was not a
+single soul in the parish that was not contented with both my walk and
+conversation. Nothing could be more peaceable than the way we lived
+together. Her brother Andrew, a fine lad, I had sent to the college at
+Glasgow, at my own cost; and when he came out to the burial, he stayed
+with me a month, for the manse after her decease was very dull, and it
+was during this visit that he gave me an inkling of his wish to go out to
+India as a cadet, but the transactions anent that fall within the scope
+of another year—as well as what relates to her headstone, and the epitaph
+in metre, which I indicated myself thereon; John Truel the mason carving
+the same, as may be seen in the kirkyard, where it wants a little
+reparation and setting upright, having settled the wrong way when the
+second Mrs. Balwhidder was laid by her side.—But I must not here enter
+upon an anticipation.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V
+YEAR 1764
+
+
+THIS year well deserved the name of the monumental year in our parish;
+for the young laird of the Breadland, that had been my pupil, being
+learning to be an advocate among the faculty in Edinburgh, with his lady
+mother, who had removed thither with the young ladies her daughters, for
+the benefit of education, sent out to be put up in the kirk, under the
+loft over the family vault, an elegant marble headstone, with an epitaph
+engraven thereon, in fair Latin, setting forth many excellent qualities
+which the old laird, my patron that was, the inditer thereof said he
+possessed. I say the inditer, because it couldna have been the young
+laird himself, although he got the credit o’t on the stone, for he was
+nae daub in my aught at the Latin or any other language. However, he
+might improve himself at Edinburgh, where a’ manner of genteel things
+were then to be got at an easy rate, and doubtless the young laird got a
+probationer at the College to write the epitaph; but I have often
+wondered sin’ syne, how he came to make it in Latin, for assuredly his
+dead parent, if he could have seen it, could not have read a single word
+o’t, notwithstanding it was so vaunty about his virtues, and other civil
+and hospitable qualifications.
+
+The coming of the laird’s monumental stone had a great effect on me, then
+in a state of deep despondency for the loss of the first Mrs. Balwhidder;
+and I thought I could not do a better thing, just by way of diversion in
+my heavy sorrow, than to get a well-shapen headstone made for her—which,
+as I have hinted at in the record of the last year, was done and set up.
+But a headstone without an epitaph, is no better than a body without the
+breath of life in’t; and so it behoved me to make a poesy for the
+monument, the which I conned and pondered upon for many days. I thought
+as Mrs. Balwhidder, worthy woman as she was, did not understand the Latin
+tongue, it would not do to put on what I had to say in that language, as
+the laird had done—nor indeed would it have been easy, as I found upon
+the experimenting, to tell what I had to tell in Latin, which is
+naturally a crabbed language, and very difficult to write properly. I
+therefore, after mentioning her age and the dates of her birth and
+departure, composed in sedate poetry the following epitaph, which may yet
+be seen on the tombstone.
+
+ EPITAPH
+
+ A lovely Christian, spouse, and friend,
+ Pleasant in life, and at her end.—
+ A pale consumption dealt the blow
+ That laid her here, with dust below.
+ Sore was the cough that shook her frame;
+ That cough her patience did proclaim—
+ And as she drew her latest breath,
+ She said, “The Lord is sweet in death.”
+ O pious reader! standing by,
+ Learn like this gentle one to die.
+ The grass doth grow and fade away,
+ And time runs out by night and day;
+ The King of Terrors has command
+ To strike us with his dart in hand.
+ Go where we will by flood or field,
+ He will pursue and make us yield.
+ But though to him we must resign
+ The vesture of our part divine,
+ There is a jewel in our trust,
+ That will not perish in the dust,
+ A pearl of price, a precious gem,
+ Ordained for Jesus’ diadem;
+ Therefore, be holy while you can,
+ And think upon the doom of man.
+ Repent in time and sin no more,
+ That when the strife of life is o’er,
+ On wings of love your soul may rise,
+ To dwell with angels in the skies,
+ Where psalms are sung eternally,
+ And martyrs ne’er again shall die;
+ But with the saints still bask in bliss,
+ And drink the cup of blessedness.
+
+This was greatly thought of at the time, and Mr. Lorimore, who had a
+nerve for poesy himself in his younger years, was of opinion that it was
+so much to the purpose, and suitable withal, that he made his scholars
+write it out for their examination copies, at the reading whereof before
+the heritors, when the examination of the school came round, the tear
+came into my eye, and every one present sympathized with me in my great
+affliction for the loss of the first Mrs. Balwhidder.
+
+Andrew Langshaw, as I have recorded, having come from the Glasgow College
+to the burial of his sister, my wife that was, stayed with me a month to
+keep me company; and staying with me, he was a great cordial, for the
+weather was wet and sleety, and the nights were stormy, so that I could
+go little out, and few of the elders came in, they being at that time old
+men in a feckless condition, not at all qualified to warsle with the
+blasts of winter. But when Andrew left me to go back to his classes, I
+was eerie and lonesome; and but for the getting of the monument ready,
+which was a blessed entertainment to me in those dreary nights, with
+consulting anent the shape of it with John Truel, and meditating on the
+verse for the epitaph, I might have gone altogether demented. However,
+it pleased Him, who is the surety of the sinner, to help me through the
+Slough of Despond, and to set my feet on firm land, establishing my way
+thereon.
+
+But the work of the monument, and the epitaph, could not endure for a
+constancy, and after it was done, I was again in great danger of sinking
+into the hypochonderies a second time. However, I was enabled to fight
+with my affliction, and by-and-by, as the spring began to open her green
+lattice, and to set out her flower-pots to the sunshine, and the time of
+the singing of birds was come, I became more composed, and like myself,
+so I often walked in the fields, and held communion with nature, and
+wondered at the mysteries thereof.
+
+On one of these occasions, as I was sauntering along the edge of
+Eaglesham-wood, looking at the industrious bee going from flower to
+flower, and the idle butterfly, that layeth up no store, but perisheth
+ere it is winter, I felt as it were a spirit from on high descending upon
+me, a throb at my heart, and a thrill in my brain, and I was transported
+out of myself, and seized with the notion of writing a book—but what it
+should be about, I could not settle to my satisfaction. Sometimes I
+thought of an orthodox poem, like _Paradise Lost_, by John Milton,
+wherein I proposed to treat more at large of Original Sin, and the great
+mystery of Redemption; at others, I fancied that a connect treatise on
+the efficacy of Free Grace would be more taking; but although I made
+divers beginnings in both subjects, some new thought ever came into my
+head, and the whole summer passed away and nothing was done. I therefore
+postponed my design of writing a book till the winter, when I would have
+the benefit of the long nights. Before that, however, I had other things
+of more importance to think about. My servant lasses, having no eye of a
+mistress over them, wastered every thing at such a rate, and made such a
+galravitching in the house, that, long before the end of the year, the
+year’s stipend was all spent, and I did not know what to do. At lang and
+length I mustered courage to send for Mr. Auld, who was then living, and
+an elder. He was a douce and discreet man, fair and well-doing in the
+world, and had a better handful of strong common sense than many even of
+the heritors. So I told him how I was situated, and conferred with him;
+and he advised me, for my own sake, to look out for another wife as soon
+as decency would allow, which he thought might very properly be after the
+turn of the year, by which time the first Mrs. Balwhidder would be dead
+more than twelve months; and when I mentioned my design to write a book,
+he said, (and he was a man of good discretion), that the doing of the
+book was a thing that would keep, but masterful servants were a growing
+evil; so, upon his counselling, I resolved not to meddle with the book
+till I was married again, but employ the interim, between then and the
+turn of the year, in looking out for a prudent woman to be my second
+wife, strictly intending, as I did perform, not to mint a word about my
+choice, if I made one, till the whole twelve months and a day, from the
+date of the first Mrs. Balwhidder’s interment, had run out.
+
+ [Picture: Sabbath Morning]
+
+In this the hand of Providence was very visible, and lucky for me it was
+that I had sent for Mr. Auld when I did send, as the very week following,
+a sound began to spread in the parish, that one of my lassies had got
+herself with bairn, which was an awful thing to think had happened in the
+house of her master, and that master a minister of the gospel. Some
+there were, for backbiting appertaineth to all conditions, that jealoused
+and wondered if I had not a finger in the pie; which, when Mr. Auld
+heard, he bestirred himself in such a manful and godly way in my defence,
+as silenced the clash, telling that I was utterly incapable of any such
+thing, being a man of a guileless heart, and a spiritual simplicity, that
+would be ornamental in a child. We then had the latheron summoned before
+the session, and was not long of making her confess that the father was
+Nichol Snipe, Lord Glencairn’s gamekeeper; and both her and Nichol were
+obligated to stand in the kirk: but Nichol was a graceless reprobate, for
+he came with two coats, one buttoned behind him, and another buttoned
+before him, and two wigs of my lord’s, lent him by the valet-de-chamer;
+the one over his face, and the other in the right way; and he stood with
+his face to the church-wall. When I saw him from the poopit, I said to
+him—“Nichol, you must turn your face towards me!” At the which, he
+turned round to be sure, but there he presented the same show as his
+back. I was confounded, and did not know what to say, but cried out with
+a voice of anger—“Nichol, Nichol! if ye had been a’ back, ye wouldna hae
+been there this day;” which had such an effect on the whole congregation,
+that the poor fellow suffered afterwards more derision, than if I had
+rebuked him in the manner prescribed by the session.
+
+This affair, with the previous advice of Mr. Auld, was, however, a
+warning to me, that no pastor of his parish should be long without a
+helpmate. Accordingly, as soon as the year was out, I set myself
+earnestly about the search for one; but as the particulars fall properly
+within the scope and chronicle of the next year, I must reserve them for
+it; and I do not recollect that any thing more particular befell in this,
+excepting that William Mutchkins, the father of Mr. Mutchkins, the great
+spirit-dealer in Glasgow, set up a change-house in the clachan, which was
+the first in the parish, and which, if I could have helped, would have
+been the last; for it was opening a howf to all manner of wickedness, and
+was an immediate get and offspring of the smuggling trade, against which
+I had so set my countenance. But William Mutchkins himself was a
+respectable man, and no house could be better ordered than his change.
+At a stated hour he made family worship, for he brought up his children
+in the fear of God and the Christian religion; and although the house was
+full, he would go in to the customers, and ask them if they would want
+anything for half an hour, for that he was going to make exercise with
+his family; and many a wayfaring traveller has joined in the prayer.
+There is no such thing, I fear, nowadays, of publicans entertaining
+travellers in this manner.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI
+YEAR 1765
+
+
+AS there was little in the last year that concerned the parish, but only
+myself, so in this the like fortune continued; and saving a rise in the
+price of barley, occasioned, as was thought, by the establishment of a
+house for brewing whisky in a neighbouring parish, it could not be said
+that my people were exposed to the mutations and influences of the stars,
+which ruled in the seasons of Ann. Dom. 1765. In the winter there was a
+dearth of fuel, such as has not been since; for when the spring loosened
+the bonds of the ice, three new coal-heughs were shanked in the Douray
+moor, and ever since there has been a great plenty of that necessary
+article. Truly, it is very wonderful to see how things come round. When
+the talk was about the shanking of their heughs, and a paper to get folk
+to take shares in them, was carried through the circumjacent parishes, it
+was thought a gowk’s errand; but no sooner was the coal reached, but up
+sprung such a traffic, that it was a godsend to the parish, and the
+opening of a trade and commerce, that has, to use an old byword, brought
+gold in gowpins amang us. From that time my stipend has been on the
+regular increase, and therefore I think that the incoming of the heritors
+must have been in like manner augmented.
+
+Soon after this, the time was drawing near for my second marriage. I had
+placed my affections, with due consideration, on Miss Lizy Kibbock, the
+well brought-up daughter of Mr. Joseph Kibbock of the Gorbyholm, who was
+the first that made a speculation in the farming way in Ayrshire, and
+whose cheese were of such an excellent quality, that they have, under the
+name of Delap-cheese, spread far and wide over the civilized world. Miss
+Lizy and me were married on the 29th day of April, with some
+inconvenience to both sides, on account of the dread that we had of being
+married in May; for it is said—
+
+ “Of the marriages in May,
+ The bairns die of a decay.”
+
+However, married we were, and we hired the Irville chaise, and with Miss
+Jenny her sister, and Becky Cairns her niece, who sat on a portmanty at
+our feet, we went on a pleasure jaunt to Glasgow, where we bought a
+miracle of useful things for the manse, that neither the first Mrs.
+Balwhidder nor me ever thought of; but the second Mrs. Balwhidder that
+was, had a geni for management, and it was extraordinary what she could
+go through. Well may I speak of her with commendations; for she was the
+bee that made my honey, although at first things did not go so clear with
+us. For she found the manse rookit and herrit, and there was such a
+supply of plenishing of all sort wanted, that I thought myself ruined and
+undone by her care and industry. There was such a buying of wool to make
+blankets, with a booming of the meikle wheel to spin the same, and such
+birring of the little wheel for sheets and napery, that the manse was for
+many a day like an organ kist. Then we had milk cows, and the calves to
+bring up, and a kirning of butter, and a making of cheese; in short, I
+was almost by myself with the jangle and din, which prevented me from
+writing a book as I had proposed, and I for a time thought of the
+peaceful and kindly nature of the first Mrs. Balwhidder with a sigh; but
+the outcoming was soon manifest. The second Mrs. Balwhidder sent her
+butter on the market-days to Irville, and her cheese from time to time to
+Glasgow, to Mrs. Firlot, that kept the huxtry in the Saltmarket; and they
+were both so well made, that our dairy was just a coining of money,
+insomuch that, after the first year, we had the whole tot of my stipend
+to put untouched into the bank.
+
+But I must say, that although we were thus making siller like sclate
+stones, I was not satisfied in my own mind that I had got the manse
+merely to be a factory of butter and cheese, and to breed up veal calves
+for the slaughter; so I spoke to the second Mrs. Balwhidder, and pointed
+out to her what I thought the error of our way; but she had been so
+ingrained with the profitable management of cows and grumphies in her
+father’s house, that she could not desist, at the which I was greatly
+grieved. By-and-by, however, I began to discern that there was something
+as good in her example, as the giving of alms to the poor folk; for all
+the wives of the parish were stirred up by it into a wonderful thrift,
+and nothing was heard of in every house, but of quiltings and wabs to
+weave; insomuch that, before many years came round, there was not a
+better stocked parish, with blankets and napery, than mine was, within
+the bounds of Scotland.
+
+It was about the Michaelmas of this year that Mrs. Malcolm opened her
+shop, which she did chiefly on the advice of Mrs. Balwhidder, who said it
+was far better to allow a little profit on the different haberdasheries
+that might be wanted, than to send to the neighbouring towns an end’s
+errand on purpose for them, none of the lasses that were so sent ever
+thinking of making less than a day’s play on every such occasion. In a
+word, it is not to be told how the second Mrs. Balwhidder, my wife,
+showed the value of flying time, even to the concerns of this world, and
+was the mean of giving a life and energy to the housewifery of the
+parish, that has made many a one beek his shins in comfort, that would
+otherwise have had but a cold coal to blow at. Indeed, Mr. Kibbock, her
+father, was a man beyond the common, and had an insight of things, by
+which he was enabled to draw profit and advantage, where others could
+only see risk and detriment. He planted mounts of fir-trees on the bleak
+and barren tops of the hills of his farm, the which everybody, and I
+among the rest, considered as a thrashing of the water and raising of
+bells. But as his rack ran his trees grew, and the plantations supplied
+him with stabs to make _stake and rice_ between his fields, which soon
+gave them a trig and orderly appearance, such as had never before been
+seen in the west country; and his example has, in this matter, been so
+followed, that I have heard travellers say, who have been in foreign
+countries, that the shire of Ayr, for its bonny round green plantings on
+the tops of the hills, is above comparison either with Italy or
+Switzerland, where the hills are, as it were, in a state of nature.
+
+Upon the whole, this was a busy year in the parish, and the seeds of many
+great improvements were laid. The king’s road, the which then ran
+through the Vennel, was mended; but it was not till some years after, as
+I shall record by-and-by, that the trust-road, as it was called, was
+made, the which had the effect of turning the town inside out.
+
+Before I conclude, it is proper to mention that the kirk-bell, which had
+to this time, from time immemorial, hung on an ash-tree, was one stormy
+night cast down by the breaking of the branch, which was the cause of the
+heritors agreeing to build the steeple. The clock was a mortification to
+the parish from the Lady Breadland, when she died some years after.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII
+YEAR 1766
+
+
+IT was in this Ann. Dom. that the great calamity happened, the which took
+place on a Sabbath evening in the month of February. Mrs. Balwhidder had
+just infused or masket the tea, and we were set round the fireside, to
+spend the night in an orderly and religious manner, along with Mr. and
+Mrs. Petticrew, who were on a friendly visitation to the manse, the
+mistress being full cousin to Mrs. Balwhidder.—Sitting, as I was saying,
+at our tea, one of the servant lasses came into the room with a sort of a
+panic laugh, and said, “What are ye all doing there when the Breadland’s
+in a low?”—“The Breadland in a low!” cried I.—“Oh, ay!” cried she;
+“bleezing at the windows and the rigging, and out at the lum, like a
+killogie.” Upon the which, we all went to the door, and there, to be
+sure, we did see that the Breadland was burning, the flames crackling
+high out o’er the trees, and the sparks flying like a comet’s tail in the
+firmament.
+
+Seeing this sight, I said to Mr. Petticrew, that, in the strength of the
+Lord, I would go and see what could be done, for it was as plain as the
+sun in the heavens that the ancient place of the Breadlands would be
+destroyed; whereupon he accorded to go with me, and we walked at a lively
+course to the spot, and the people from all quarters were pouring in, and
+it was an awsome scene. But the burning of the house, and the droves of
+the multitude, were nothing to what we saw when we got forenent the
+place. There was the rafters crackling, the flames raging, the servants
+running, some with bedding, some with looking-glasses, and others with
+chamber utensils as little likely to be fuel to the fire, but all
+testifications to the confusion and alarm. Then there was a shout,
+“Whar’s Miss Girzie? whar’s the Major?” The Major, poor man, soon cast
+up, lying upon a feather-bed, ill with his complaints, in the garden; but
+Lady Skimmilk was nowhere to be found. At last, a figure was seen in the
+upper flat, pursued by the flames, and that was Miss Girzie. Oh! it was
+a terrible sight to look at her in that jeopardy at the window, with her
+gold watch in the one hand and the silver teapot in the other, skreighing
+like desperation for a ladder and help. But, before a ladder or help
+could be found, the floor sunk down, and the roof fell in, and poor Miss
+Girzie, with her idols, perished in the burning. It was a dreadful
+business! I think, to this hour, how I saw her at the window, how the
+fire came in behind her, and claught her like a fiery Belzebub, and bore
+her into perdition before our eyes. The next morning the atomy of the
+body was found among the rubbish, with a piece of metal in what had been
+each of its hands, no doubt the gold watch and the silver teapot. Such
+was the end of Miss Girzie; and the Breadland, which the young laird, my
+pupil that was, by growing a resident at Edinburgh, never rebuilt. It
+was burnt to the very ground; nothing was spared but what the servants in
+the first flaught gathered up in a hurry and ran with; but no one could
+tell how the Major, who was then, as it was thought by the faculty, past
+the power of nature to recover, got out of the house, and was laid on the
+feather-bed in the garden. However, he never got the better of that
+night, and before Whitsunday he was dead too, and buried beside his
+sister’s bones at the south side of the kirkyard dyke, where his cousin’s
+son, that was his heir, erected the handsome monument, with the three
+urns and weeping cherubims, bearing witness to the great valour of the
+Major among the Hindoos, as well as other commendable virtues, for which,
+as the epitaph says, he was universally esteemed and beloved, by all who
+knew him, in his public and private capacity.
+
+But although the burning of the Breadland-House was justly called the
+great calamity, on account of what happened to Miss Girzie with her gold
+watch and silver teapot; yet, as Providence never fails to bring good out
+of evil, it turned out a catastrophe that proved advantageous to the
+parish; for the laird, instead of thinking to build it up, was advised to
+let the policy out as a farm, and the tack was taken by Mr. Coulter, than
+whom there had been no such man in the agriculturing line among us
+before, not even excepting Mr. Kibbock of the Gorbyholm, my father-in-law
+that was. Of the stabling, Mr. Coulter made a comfortable
+dwelling-house; and having rugget out the evergreens and other
+unprofitable plants, saving the twa ancient yew-trees which the
+near-begaun Major and his sister had left to go to ruin about the
+mansion-house, he turned all to production, and it was wonderful what an
+increase he made the land bring forth. He was from far beyond Edinburgh,
+and had got his insight among the Lothian farmers, so that he knew what
+crop should follow another, and nothing could surpass the regularity of
+his rigs and furrows.—Well do I remember the admiration that I had, when,
+in a fine sunny morning of the first spring after he took the Breadland,
+I saw his braird on what had been the cows’ grass, as even and pretty as
+if it had been worked and stripped in the loom with a shuttle. Truly,
+when I look back at the example he set, and when I think on the method
+and dexterity of his management, I must say, that his coming to the
+parish was a great godsend, and tended to do far more for the benefit of
+my people, than if the young laird had rebuilded the Breadland-House in a
+fashionable style, as was at one time spoken of.
+
+But the year of the great calamity was memorable for another thing:—in
+the December foregoing, the wind blew, as I have recorded in the
+chronicle of the last year, and broke down the bough of the tree whereon
+the kirk-bell had hung from the time, as was supposed, of the
+persecution, before the bringing over of King William. Mr. Kibbock, my
+father-in-law then that was, being a man of a discerning spirit, when he
+heard of the unfortunate fall of the bell, advised me to get the heritors
+to big a steeple; but which, when I thought of the expense, I was afraid
+to do. He, however, having a great skill in the heart of man, gave me no
+rest on the subject; but told me, that if I allowed the time to go by
+till the heritors were used to come to the kirk without a bell, I would
+get no steeple at all. I often wondered what made Mr. Kibbock so fond of
+a steeple, which is a thing that I never could see a good reason for,
+saving that it is an ecclesiastical adjunct, like the gown and bands.
+However, he set me on to get a steeple proposed, and after no little
+argol-bargling with the heritors, it was agreed to. This was chiefly
+owing to the instrumentality of Lady Moneyplack, who, in that winter, was
+much subjected to the rheumatics, she having, one cold and raw Sunday
+morning, there being no bell to announce the time, come half an hour too
+soon to the kirk, made her bestir herself to get an interest awakened
+among the heritors in behalf of a steeple.
+
+But when the steeple was built, a new contention arose. It was thought
+that the bell, which had been used in the ash-tree, would not do in a
+stone and lime fabric; so, after great agitation among the heritors, it
+was resolved to sell the old bell to a foundery in Glasgow, and buy a new
+bell suitable to the steeple, which was a very comely fabric. The buying
+of the new bell led to other considerations, and the old Lady Breadland,
+being at the time in a decaying condition, and making her will, she left
+a mortification to the parish, as I have intimated, to get a clock; so
+that, by the time the steeple was finished, and the bell put up, the Lady
+Breadland’s legacy came to be implemented, according to the ordination of
+the testatrix.
+
+Of the casualities that happened in this year, I should not forget to put
+down, as a thing for remembrance, that an aged woman, one Nanse Birrel, a
+distillator of herbs, and well skilled in the healing of sores, who had a
+great repute among the quarriers and colliers—she having gone to the
+physic well in the sandy hills to draw water, was found, with her feet
+uppermost in the well, by some of the bairns of Mr. Lorimore’s school;
+and there was a great debate whether Nanse had fallen in by accident head
+foremost, or, in a temptation, thrown herself in that position, with her
+feet sticking up to the evil one; for Nanse was a curious discontented
+blear-eyed woman, and it was only with great ado that I could get the
+people keepit from calling her a witchwife.
+
+I should likewise place on record, that the first ass that had ever been
+seen in this part of the country, came in the course of this year with a
+gang of tinklers, that made horn-spoons and mended bellows. Where they
+came from never was well made out; but being a blackaviced crew, they
+were generally thought to be Egyptians. They tarried about a week among
+us, living in tents, with their little ones squattling among the litter;
+and one of the older men of them set and tempered to me two razors, that
+were as good as nothing, but which he made better than when they were
+new.
+
+ [Picture: The Old Ploughman]
+
+Shortly after, but I am not quite sure whether it was in the end of this
+year, or the beginning of the next, although I have a notion that it was
+in this, there came over from Ireland a troop of wild Irish, seeking for
+work as they said; but they made free quarters, for they herrit the
+roosts of the clachan, and cutted the throat of a sow of ours, the
+carcass of which they no doubt intended to steal; but something came over
+them, and it was found lying at the back side of the manse, to the great
+vexation of Mrs. Balwhidder; for she had set her mind on a clecking of
+pigs, and only waited for the China boar, that had been brought down from
+London by Lord Eaglesham, to mend the breed of pork—a profitable
+commodity, that her father, Mr. Kibbock, cultivated for the Glasgow
+market. The destruction of our sow, under such circumstances, was
+therefore held to be a great crime and cruelty, and it had the effect to
+raise up such a spirit in the clachan, that the Irish were obligated to
+decamp; and they set out for Glasgow, where one of them was afterwards
+hanged for a fact, but the truth concerning how he did it, I either never
+heard, or it has passed from my mind, like many other things I should
+have carefully treasured.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII
+YEAR 1767
+
+
+ALL things in our parish were now beginning to shoot up into a great
+prosperity. The spirit of farming began to get the upper hand of the
+spirit of smuggling, and the coal-heughs that had been opened in the
+Douray, now brought a pour of money among us. In the manse, the thrift
+and frugality of the second Mrs. Balwhidder throve exceedingly, so that
+we could save the whole stipend for the bank.
+
+The king’s highway, as I have related in the foregoing, ran through the
+Vennel, which was a narrow and a crooked street, with many big stones
+here and there, and every now and then, both in the spring and the fall,
+a gathering of middens for the fields; insomuch that the coal-carts from
+the Douray moor were often reested in the middle of the causey, and on
+more than one occasion some of them laired altogether in the middens, and
+others of them broke down. Great complaint was made by the carters anent
+these difficulties, and there was, for many a day, a talk and sound of an
+alteration and amendment; but nothing was fulfilled in the matter till
+the month of March in this year, when the Lord Eaglesham was coming from
+London to see the new lands that he had bought in our parish. His
+lordship was a man of a genteel spirit, and very fond of his horses,
+which were the most beautiful creatures of their kind that had been seen
+in all the country side. Coming, as I was noting, to see his new lands,
+he was obliged to pass through the clachan one day, when all the middens
+were gathered out, reeking and sappy, in the middle of the causey. Just
+as his lordship was driving in with his prancing steeds, like a Jehu, at
+one end of the vennel, a long string of loaded coal-carts came in at the
+other, and there was hardly room for my lord to pass them. What was to
+be done? His lordship could not turn back, and the coal-carts were in no
+less perplexity. Every body was out of doors to see and to help; when,
+in trying to get his lordship’s carriage over the top of a midden, the
+horses gave a sudden loup, and couped the coach, and threw my lord, head
+foremost, into the very scent-bottle of the whole commodity, which made
+him go perfect mad, and he swore like a trooper that he would get an act
+of parliament to put down the nuisance—the which now ripened in the
+course of this year into the undertaking of the trust-road.
+
+His lordship, being in a woeful plight, left the carriage and came to the
+manse, till his servant went to the castle for a change for him; but he
+could not wait nor abide himself: so he got the lend of my best suit of
+clothes, and was wonderful jocose both with Mrs. Balwhidder and me, for
+he was a portly man, and I but a thin body, and it was really a droll
+curiosity to see his lordship clad in my garments.
+
+Out of this accident grew a sort of a neighbourliness between that Lord
+Eaglesham and me; so that when Andrew Lanshaw, the brother that was of
+the first Mrs. Balwhidder, came to think of going to India, I wrote to my
+lord for his behoof, and his lordship got him sent out as a cadet, and
+was extraordinary discreet to Andrew when he went up to London to take
+his passage, speaking to him of me as if I had been a very saint, which
+the Searcher of Hearts knows I am far from thinking myself.
+
+But to return to the making of the trust-road, which, as I have said,
+turned the town inside out. It was agreed among the heritors, that it
+should run along the back side of the south houses; and that there should
+be steadings fued off on each side, according to a plan that was laid
+down; and this being gone into, the town gradually, in the course of
+years, grew up into that orderlyness which makes it now a pattern to the
+country side—all which was mainly owing to the accident that befell the
+Lord Eaglesham, which is a clear proof how improvements come about, as it
+were, by the immediate instigation of Providence, which should make the
+heart of man humble, and change his eyes of pride and haughtiness into a
+lowly demeanour.
+
+But although this making of the trust-road was surely a great thing for
+the parish, and of an advantage to my people, we met, in this year, with
+a loss not to be compensated—that was the death of Nanse Banks, the
+schoolmistress. She had been long in a weak and frail state; but being a
+methodical creature, still kept on the school, laying the foundation for
+many a worthy wife and mother. However, about the decline of the year
+her complaints increased, and she sent for me to consult about her giving
+up the school; and I went to see her on Saturday afternoon, when the bit
+lassies, her scholars, had put the house in order, and gone home till the
+Monday.
+
+She was sitting in the window-nook, reading THE WORD to herself, when I
+entered; but she closed the book, and put her spectacles in for a mark
+when she saw me; and, as it was expected I would come, her easy-chair,
+with a clean cover, had been set out for me by the scholars, by which I
+discerned that there was something more than common to happen, and so it
+appeared when I had taken my seat.
+
+“Sir,” said she, “I hae sent for you on a thing troubles me sairly. I
+have warsled with poortith in this shed, which it has pleased the Lord to
+allow me to possess; but my strength is worn out, and I fear I maun yield
+in the strife;” and she wiped her eye with her apron. I told her,
+however, to be of good cheer; and then she said, “That she could no
+longer thole the din of the school, and that she was weary, and ready to
+lay herself down to die whenever the Lord was pleased to permit.” “But,”
+continued she, “what can I do without the school; and, alas! I can
+neither work nor want; and I am wae to go on the session, for I am come
+of a decent family.” I comforted her, and told her, that I thought she
+had done so much good in the parish, that the session was deep in her
+debt, and that what they might give her was but a just payment for her
+service. “I would rather, however, sir,” said she, “try first what some
+of my auld scholars will do, and it was for that I wanted to speak with
+you. If some of them would but just, from time to time, look in upon me,
+that I may not die alane; and the little pick and drap that I require
+would not be hard upon them—I am more sure that in this way their
+gratitude would be no discredit, than I am of having any claim on the
+session.”
+
+As I had always a great respect for an honest pride, I assured her that I
+would do what she wanted; and accordingly, the very morning after, being
+Sabbath, I preached a sermon on the helplessness of them that have no
+help of man, meaning aged single women, living in garret-rooms, whose
+forlorn state, in the gloaming of life, I made manifest to the hearts and
+understandings of the congregation, in such a manner that many shed
+tears, and went away sorrowful.
+
+Having thus roused the feelings of my people, I went round the houses on
+the Monday morning, and mentioned what I had to say more particularly
+about poor old Nanse Banks, the schoolmistress, and truly I was rejoiced
+at the condition of the hearts of my people. There was a universal
+sympathy among them; and it was soon ordered that, what with one and
+another, her decay should be provided for. But it was not ordained that
+she should be long heavy on their good-will. On the Monday the school
+was given up, and there was nothing but wailing among the bit lassies,
+the scholars, for getting the vacance, as the poor things said, because
+the mistress was going to lie down to dee. And, indeed, so it came to
+pass; for she took to her bed the same afternoon, and, in the course of
+the week, dwindled away, and slipped out of this howling wilderness into
+the kingdom of heaven, on the Sabbath following, as quietly as a blessed
+saint could do. And here I should mention, that the Lady Macadam, when I
+told her of Nanse Banks’s case, enquired if she was a snuffer, and, being
+answered by me that she was, her ladyship sent her a pretty French enamel
+box full of macabaw, a fine snuff that she had in a bottle; and, among
+the macabaw, was found a guinea, at the bottom of the box, after Nanse
+Banks had departed this life, which was a kind thing of Lady Macadam to
+do.
+
+About the close of this year there was a great sough of old prophecies,
+foretelling mutations and adversities, chiefly on account of the canal
+that was spoken of to join the rivers of the Clyde and the Forth, it
+being thought an impossible thing to be done; and the Adam and Eve
+pear-tree, in our garden, budded out in an awful manner, and had divers
+flourishes on it at Yule, which was thought an ominous thing, especially
+as the second Mrs. Balwhidder was at the downlying with my eldest son
+Gilbert, that is, the merchant in Glasgow; but nothing came o’t, and the
+howdie said she had an easy time when the child came into the world,
+which was on the very last day of the year, to the great satisfaction of
+me, and of my people, who were wonderful lifted up because their minister
+had a man-child born unto him.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX
+YEAR 1768
+
+
+IT’S a surprising thing how time flieth away, carrying off our youth and
+strength, and leaving us nothing but wrinkles and the ails of old age.
+Gilbert, my son, that is now a corpulent man, and a Glasgow merchant,
+when I take up my pen to record the memorables of this Ann. Dom., seems
+to me yet but a suckling in swaddling clothes, mewing and peevish in the
+arms of his mother, that has been long laid in the cold kirkyard, beside
+her predecessor, in Abraham’s bosom. It is not, however, my design to
+speak much anent my own affairs, which would be a very improper and
+uncomely thing, but only of what happened in the parish, this book being
+for a witness and testimony of my ministry. Therefore, setting out of
+view both me and mine, I will now resuscitate the concerns of Mrs.
+Malcolm and her children; for, as I think, never was there such a visible
+preordination seen in the lives of any persons, as was seen in that of
+this worthy decent woman, and her well-doing off-spring. Her morning was
+raw, and a sore blight fell upon her fortunes; but the sun looked out on
+her midday, and her evening closed loun and warm; and the stars of the
+firmament, that are the eyes of heaven, beamed as it were with gladness,
+when she lay down to sleep the sleep of rest.
+
+Her son Charles was by this time grown up into a stout buirdly lad, and
+it was expected that, before the return of the Tobacco trader, he would
+have been out of his time, and a man afore the mast, which was a great
+step of preferment, as I heard say by persons skilled in seafaring
+concerns. But this was not ordered to happen; for, when the Tobacco
+trader was lying in the harbour of Virginia in the North Americas, a
+pressgang, that was in need of men for a man-of-war, came on board, and
+pressed poor Charles, and sailed away with him on a cruise, nobody, for
+many a day, could tell where, till I thought of the Lord Eaglesham’s
+kindness. His lordship having something to say with the king’s
+government, I wrote to him, telling him who I was, and how jocose he had
+been when buttoned in my clothes, that he might recollect me, thanking
+him, at the same time, for his condescension and patronage to Andrew
+Lanshaw, in his way to the East Indies. I then slipped in, at the end of
+the letter, a bit nota-bene concerning the case of Charles Malcolm,
+begging his lordship, on account of the poor lad’s widow mother, to
+enquire at the government if they could tell us any thing about Charles.
+In the due course of time, I got a most civil reply from his lordship,
+stating all about the name of the man-of-war, and where she was; and at
+the conclusion his lordship said, that I was lucky in having the brother
+of a Lord of the Admiralty on this occasion for my agent, as otherwise,
+from the vagueness of my statement, the information might not have been
+procured; which remark of his lordship was long a great riddle to me; for
+I could not think what he meant about an agent, till, in the course of
+the year, we heard that his own brother was concerned in the admiralty;
+so that all his lordship meant was only to crack a joke with me, and that
+he was ever ready and free to do, as shall be related in the sequel, for
+he was an excellent man.
+
+There being a vacancy for a schoolmistress, it was proposed to Mrs.
+Malcolm, that, under her superintendence, her daughter Kate, that had
+been learning great artifices in needle-work so long with Lady Macadam,
+should take up the school, and the session undertook to make good to Kate
+the sum of five pounds sterling per annum, over and above what the
+scholars were to pay. But Mrs. Malcolm said she had not strength herself
+to warsle with so many unruly brats, and that Kate, though a fine lassie,
+was a tempestuous spirit, and might lame some of the bairns in her
+passion; and that selfsame night, Lady Macadam wrote me a very
+complaining letter, for trying to wile away her companion; but her
+ladyship was a canary-headed woman, and given to flights and tantrums,
+having in her youth been a great toast among the quality. It would,
+however, have saved her from a sore heart, had she never thought of
+keeping Kate Malcolm. For this year her only son, who was learning the
+art of war at an academy in France, came to pay her, his lady mother, a
+visit. He was a brisk and light-hearted stripling, and Kate Malcolm was
+budding into a very rose of beauty; so between them a hankering began,
+which, for a season, was productive of great heaviness of heart to the
+poor old cripple lady; indeed, she assured me herself, that all her
+rheumatics were nothing to the heart-ache which she suffered in the
+progress of this business. But that will be more treated of hereafter;
+suffice it to say for the present, that we have thus recorded how the
+plan for making Kate Malcolm our schoolmistress came to nought. It
+pleased, however, Him, from whom cometh every good and perfect gift, to
+send at this time among us a Miss Sabrina Hooky, the daughter of old Mr.
+Hooky, who had been schoolmaster in a neighbouring parish. She had gone,
+after his death, to live with an auntie in Glasgow, that kept a shop in
+the Gallowgate. It was thought that the old woman would have left her
+heir to all her gatherings, and so she said she would, but alas! our life
+is but within our lip. Before her testament was made, she was carried
+suddenly off by an apoplectick, an awful monument of the uncertainty of
+time and the nearness of eternity, in her own shop, as she was in the
+very act of weighing out an ounce of snuff to a professor of the College,
+as Miss Sabrina herself told me. Being thus destitute, it happened that
+Miss Sabrina heard of the vacancy in our parish, as it were, just by the
+cry of a passing bird, for she could not tell how; although I judge
+myself that William Keckle the elder had a hand in it, as he was at the
+time in Glasgow; and she wrote me a wonderful well-penned letter
+bespeaking the situation, which letter came to hand on the morn following
+Lady Macadam’s stramash to me about Kate Malcolm, and I laid it before
+the session the same day; so that, by the time her auntie’s concern was
+taken off her hands, she had a home and a howf among us to come in, to
+the which she lived upwards of thirty years in credit and respect,
+although some thought she had not the art of her predecessor, and was
+more uppish in her carriage than befitted the decorum of her vocation.
+Hers, however, was but a harmless vanity; and, poor woman, she needed all
+manner of graces to set her out; for she was made up of odds and ends,
+and had but one good eye, the other being blind, and just like a blue
+bead. At first she plainly set her cap for Mr. Lorimore, but after
+oggling and goggling at him every Sunday in the kirk for a whole
+half-year and more, Miss Sabrina desisted in despair.
+
+But the most remarkable thing about her coming into the parish, was the
+change that took place in Christian names among us. Old Mr. Hooky, her
+father, had, from the time he read his Virgil, maintained a sort of
+intromission with the nine muses, by which he was led to baptize her
+Sabrina, after a name mentioned by John Milton in one of his works. Miss
+Sabrina began by calling our Jennies Jessies, and our Nannies Nancies;
+alas! I have lived to see even these likewise grow old-fashioned. She
+had also a taste in the mantua-making line, which she had learnt in
+Glasgow; and I could date from the very Sabbath of her first appearance
+in the kirk, a change growing in the garb of the younger lassies, who
+from that day began to lay aside the silken plaidie over the head, the
+which had been the pride and bravery of their grandmothers; and instead
+of the snood, that was so snod and simple, they hided their heads in
+round-eared bees-cap mutches, made of gauze and catgut, and other curious
+contrivances of French millendery; all which brought a deal of custom to
+Miss Sabrina, over and above the incomings and Candlemas offerings of
+school; insomuch that she saved money, and in the course of three years
+had ten pounds to put in the bank.
+
+At the time, these alterations and revolutions in the parish were thought
+a great advantage; but now when I look back upon them, as a traveller on
+the hill over the road he has passed, I have my doubts. For with wealth
+come wants, like a troop of clamorous beggars at the heels of a generous
+man; and it’s hard to tell wherein the benefit of improvement in a
+country parish consists, especially to those who live by the sweat of
+their brow. But it is not for me to make reflections; my task and duty
+is to note the changes of time and habitudes.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X
+YEAR 1769
+
+
+I HAVE my doubts whether it was in the beginning of this year, or in the
+end of the last, that a very extraordinary thing came to light in the
+parish; but, howsoever that may be, there is nothing more certain than
+the fact, which it is my duty to record. I have mentioned already how it
+was that the toll, or trust-road, was set a-going, on account of the Lord
+Eaglesham’s tumbling on the midden in the Vennel. Well, it happened to
+one of the labouring men, in breaking the stones to make metal for the
+new road, that he broke a stone that was both large and remarkable, and
+in the heart of it, which was boss, there was found a living creature,
+that jumped out the moment it saw the light of heaven, to the great
+terrification of the man, who could think it was nothing but an evil
+spirit that had been imprisoned therein for a time. The man came to me
+like a demented creature, and the whole clachan gathered out, young and
+old, and I went at their head to see what the miracle could be, for the
+man said it was a fiery dragon, spewing smoke and flames. But when we
+came to the spot, it was just a yird toad, and the laddie weans nevelled
+it to death with stones, before I could persuade them to give over.
+Since then, I have read of such things coming to light in the _Scots
+Magazine_, a very valuable book.
+
+ [Picture: The Elder’s Wife]
+
+Soon after the affair of “the wee deil in the stane,” as it was called, a
+sough reached us that the Americas were seized with the rebellious spirit
+of the ten tribes, and were snapping their fingers in the face of the
+king’s government. The news came on a Saturday night, for we had no
+newspapers in those days, and was brought by Robin Modiwort, that fetched
+the letters from the Irville post. Thomas Fullarton (he has been dead
+many a day) kept the grocery shop at Irville, and he had been in at
+Glasgow, as was his yearly custom, to settle his accounts, and to buy a
+hogshead of tobacco, with sugar and other spiceries; and being in
+Glasgow, Thomas was told by the merchant of a great rise in tobacco, that
+had happened by reason of the contumacity of the plantations, and it was
+thought that blood would be spilt before things were ended, for that the
+King and Parliament were in a great passion with them. But as Charles
+Malcolm, in the king’s ship, was the only one belonging to the parish
+that was likely to be art and part in the business, we were in a manner
+little troubled at the time with this first gasp of the monster of war,
+who, for our sins, was ordained to swallow up and devour so many of our
+fellow-subjects, before he was bound again in the chains of mercy and
+peace.
+
+I had, in the meantime, written a letter to the Lord Eaglesham, to get
+Charles Malcolm out of the clutches of the pressgang in the man-of-war;
+and about a month after, his lordship sent me an answer, wherein was
+enclosed a letter from the captain of the ship, saying, that Charles
+Malcolm was so good a man that he was reluctant to part with him, and
+that Charles himself was well contented to remain aboard. Anent which,
+his lordship said to me, that he had written back to the captain to make
+a midshipman of Charles, and that he would take him under his own
+protection, which was great joy on two accounts to us all, especially to
+his mother; first, to hear that Charles was a good man, although in years
+still but a youth; and, secondly, that my lord had, of his own free-will,
+taken him under the wing of his patronage.
+
+But the sweet of this world is never to be enjoyed without some of the
+sour. The coal bark between Irville and Belfast, in which Robert
+Malcolm, the second son of his mother, was serving his time to be a
+sailor, got a charter, as it was called, to go with to Norway for deals,
+which grieved Mrs. Malcolm to the very heart; for there was then no short
+cut by the canal, as now is, between the rivers of the Forth and Clyde,
+but every ship was obligated to go far away round by the Orkneys, which,
+although a voyage in the summer not overly dangerous, there being long
+days and short nights then, yet in the winter it was far otherwise, many
+vessels being frozen up in the Baltic till the spring; and there was a
+story told at the time, of an Irville bark coming home in the dead of the
+year, that lost her way altogether, and was supposed to have sailed north
+into utter darkness, for she was never more heard of: and many an awful
+thing was said of what the auld mariners about the shore thought
+concerning the crew of that misfortunate vessel. However, Mrs. Malcolm
+was a woman of great faith, and having placed her reliance on Him who is
+the orphan’s stay and widow’s trust, she resigned her bairn into his
+hands, with a religious submission to his pleasure, though the mother’s
+tear of weak human nature was on her cheek and in her e’e. And her faith
+was well rewarded, for the vessel brought him safe home, and he had seen
+such a world of things, that it was just to read a story-book to hear him
+tell of Elsineur and Gottenburg, and other fine and great places that we
+had never heard of till that time; and he brought me a bottle of Riga
+balsam, which for healing cuts was just miraculous, besides a clear
+bottle of Rososolus for his mother, a spirit which for cordiality could
+not be told; for though since that time we have had many a sort of
+Dantzic cordial, I have never tasted any to compare with Robin Malcolm’s
+Rososolus. The Lady Macadam, who had a knowledge of such things,
+declared it was the best of the best sort; for Mrs. Malcolm sent her
+ladyship some of it in a doctor’s bottle, as well as to Mrs. Balwhidder,
+who was then at the downlying with our daughter Janet—a woman now in the
+married state, that makes a most excellent wife, having been brought up
+with great pains, and well educated, as I shall have to record by-and-by.
+
+About the Christmas of this year, Lady Macadam’s son having been
+perfected in the art of war at a school in France, had, with the help of
+his mother’s friends, and his father’s fame, got a stand of colours in
+the Royal Scots regiment; he came to show himself in his regimentals to
+his lady mother, like a dutiful son, as he certainly was. It happened
+that he was in the kirk in his scarlets and gold, on the same Sunday that
+Robert Malcolm came home from the long voyage to Norway for deals; and I
+thought when I saw the soldier and the sailor from the pulpit, that it
+was an omen of war, among our harmless country folks, like swords and
+cannon amidst ploughs and sickles, coming upon us; and I became laden in
+spirit, and had a most weighty prayer upon the occasion, which was long
+after remembered, many thinking, when the American war broke out, that I
+had been gifted with a glimmering of prophecy on that day.
+
+It was during this visit to his lady mother, that young Laird Macadam
+settled the correspondence with Kate Malcolm, which, in the process of
+time, caused us all so much trouble; for it was a clandestine concern:
+but the time is not yet ripe for me to speak of it more at large. I
+should, however, mention, before concluding this annal, that Mrs. Malcolm
+herself was this winter brought to death’s door by a terrible host that
+came on her in the kirk, by taking a kittling in her throat. It was a
+terrification to hear her sometimes; but she got the better of it in the
+spring, and was more herself thereafter than she had been for years
+before; and her daughter Effie or Euphemia, as she was called by Miss
+Sabrina, the schoolmistress, was growing up to be a gleg and clever
+quean; she was, indeed, such a spirit in her way, that the folks called
+her Spunkie; while her son William, that was the youngest of the five,
+was making a wonderful proficiency with Mr. Lorimore. He was indeed a
+douce, well-doing laddie, of a composed nature; insomuch that the master
+said he was surely chosen for the ministry. In short, the more I think
+on what befell this family, and of the great meekness and Christian worth
+of the parent, I verily believe there never could have been in any parish
+such a manifestation of the truth, that they who put their trust in the
+Lord, are sure of having a friend that will never forsake them.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI
+YEAR 1770
+
+
+THIS blessed Ann. Dom. was one of the Sabbaths of my ministry. When I
+look back upon it, all is quiet and good order: the darkest cloud of the
+smuggling had passed over, at least from my people, and the rumours of
+rebellion in America were but like the distant sound of the bars of Ayr.
+We sat, as it were, in a lown and pleasant place, beholding our
+prosperity, like the apple-tree adorned with her garlands of flourishes,
+in the first fair mornings of the spring, when the birds were returning
+thanks to their Maker for the coming again of the seed-time, and the busy
+bee goeth forth from her cell, to gather honey from the flowers of the
+field, and the broom of the hill, and the blue-bells and gowans, which
+Nature, with a gracious and a gentle hand, scatters in the valley, as she
+walketh forth in her beauty, to testify to the goodness of the Father of
+all mercies.
+
+Both at the spring and the harvest sacraments, the weather was as that
+which is in Paradise; there was a glad composure in all hearts, and the
+minds of men were softened towards each other. The number of
+communicants was greater than had been known for many years, and the
+tables were filled by the pious from many a neighbouring parish: those of
+my hearers who had opposed my placing, declared openly, for a testimony
+of satisfaction and holy thankfulness, that the tent, so surrounded as it
+was on both occasions, was a sight they never had expected to see. I
+was, to be sure, assisted by some of the best divines then in the land,
+but I had not been a sluggard myself in the vineyard.
+
+Often, when I think on this year, so fruitful in pleasant intimacies, has
+the thought come into my mind, that as the Lord blesses the earth from
+time to time with a harvest of more than the usual increase, so, in like
+manner, he is sometimes for a season pleased to pour into the breasts of
+mankind a larger portion of good-will and charity, disposing them to love
+one another, to be kindly to all creatures, and filled with the delight
+of thankfulness to himself, which is the greatest of blessings.
+
+It was in this year that the Earl of Eaglesham ordered the fair to be
+established in the village; and it was a day of wonderful festivity to
+all the bairns, and lads and lassies, for miles round. I think, indeed,
+that there has never been such a fair as the first since; for although we
+have more mountebanks and merry-andrews now, and richer cargoes of
+groceries and packman’s stands, yet there has been a falling off in the
+light-hearted daffing, while the hobleshows in the change-houses have
+been awfully augmented. It was on this occasion that Punch’s opera was
+first seen in our country side, and surely never was there such a funny
+curiosity; for although Mr. Punch himself was but a timber idol, he was
+as droll as a true living thing, and napped with his head so comical; but
+oh! he was a sorrowful contumacious captain, and it was just a sport to
+see how he rampaged, and triumphed, and sang. For months after, the
+laddie weans did nothing but squeak and sing like Punch. In short, a
+blithe spirit was among us throughout this year, and the briefness of the
+chronicle bears witness to the innocency of the time.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII
+YEAR 1771
+
+
+IT was in this year that my troubles with Lady Macadam’s affair began.
+She was a woman, as I have by hint here and there intimated, of a
+prelatic disposition, seeking all things her own way, and not overly
+scrupulous about the means, which I take to be the true humour of
+prelacy. She was come of a high episcopal race in the east country,
+where sound doctrine had been long but little heard, and she considered
+the comely humility of a presbyter as the wickedness of hypocrisy; so
+that, saving in the way of neighbourly visitation, there was no sincere
+communion between us. Nevertheless, with all her vagaries, she had the
+element of a kindly spirit, that would sometimes kythe in actions of
+charity, that showed symptoms of a true Christian grace, had it been
+properly cultivated; but her morals had been greatly neglected in her
+youth, and she would waste her precious time in the long winter nights,
+playing at the cards with her visitors; in the which thriftless and
+sinful pastime, she was at great pains to instruct Kate Malcolm, which I
+was grieved to understand. What, however, I most misliked in her
+ladyship, was a lightness and juvenility of behaviour altogether
+unbecoming her years; for she was far past three-score, having been long
+married without children. Her son, the soldier officer, came so late,
+that it was thought she would have been taken up as an evidence in the
+Douglas cause. She was, to be sure, crippled with the rheumatics, and no
+doubt the time hung heavy on her hands; but the best friends of
+recreation and sport must allow, that an old woman, sitting whole hours
+jingling with that paralytic chattel a spinnet, was not a natural object!
+What, then, could be said for her singing Italian songs, and getting all
+the newest from Vauxhall in London, a boxful at a time, with new
+novel-books, and trinkum-trankum flowers and feathers, and sweetmeats,
+sent to her by a lady of the blood royal of Paris? As for the music, she
+was at great pains to instruct Kate, which, with the other things she
+taught, were sufficient, as my lady said herself, to qualify poor Kate
+for a duchess or a governess, in either of which capacities, her ladyship
+assured Mrs. Malcolm, she would do honour to her instructor, meaning her
+own self; but I must come to the point anent the affair.
+
+One evening, early in the month of January, as I was sitting by myself in
+my closet studying the _Scots Magazine_, which I well remember the new
+number had come but that very night, Mrs. Balwhidder being at the time
+busy with the lasses in the kitchen, and superintending, as her custom
+was, for she was a clever woman, a great wool-spinning we then had, both
+little wheel and meikle wheel, for stockings and blankets—sitting, as I
+was saying, in the study, with the fire well gathered up, for a night’s
+reflection, a prodigious knocking came to the door, by which the book was
+almost startled out of my hand, and all the wheels in the house were
+silenced at once. This was her ladyship’s flunkey, to beg me to go to
+her, whom he described as in a state of desperation. Christianity
+required that I should obey the summons; so, with what haste I could,
+thinking that perhaps, as she had been low-spirited for some time about
+the young laird’s going to the Indies, she might have got a cast of
+grace, and been wakened in despair to the state of darkness in which she
+had so long lived, I made as few steps of the road between the manse and
+her house as it was in my ability to do.
+
+On reaching the door, I found a great light in the house—candles burning
+up stairs and down stairs, and a sough of something extraordinar going
+on. I went into the dining-room, where her ladyship was wont to sit; but
+she was not there—only Kate Malcolm all alone, busily picking bits of
+paper from the carpet. When she looked up, I saw that her eyes were red
+with weeping, and I was alarmed, and said, “Katy, my dear, I hope there
+is no danger?” Upon which the poor lassie rose, and, flinging herself in
+a chair, covered her face with her hands, and wept bitterly.
+
+“What is the old fool doing with the wench?” cried a sharp angry voice
+from the drawing-room—“why does not he come to me?” It was the voice of
+Lady Macadam herself, and she meant me. So I went to her; but, oh! she
+was in a far different state from what I had hoped. The pride of this
+world had got the upper hand of her, and was playing dreadful antics with
+understanding. There was she, painted like a Jezebel, with gum-flowers
+on her head, as was her custom every afternoon, sitting on a settee, for
+she was lame, and in her hand she held a letter. “Sir,” said she, as I
+came into the room, “I want you to go instantly to that young fellow,
+your clerk, (meaning Mr. Lorimore, the schoolmaster, who was likewise
+session-clerk and precentor,) and tell him I will give him a couple of
+hundred pounds to marry Miss Malcolm without delay, and undertake to
+procure him a living from some of my friends.”
+
+“Softly, my lady, you must first tell me the meaning of all this haste of
+kindness,” said I, in my calm methodical manner. At the which she began
+to cry and sob, like a petted bairn, and to bewail her ruin, and the
+dishonour of her family. I was surprised, and beginning to be
+confounded; at length out it came. The flunkey had that night brought
+two London letters from the Irville post, and Kate Malcolm being out of
+the way when he came home, he took them both in to her ladyship on the
+silver server, as was his custom; and her ladyship, not jealousing that
+Kate could have a correspondence with London, thought both the letters
+were for herself, for they were franked; so, as it happened, she opened
+the one that was for Kate, and this, too, from the young laird, her own
+son. She could not believe her eyes when she saw the first words in his
+hand of write; and she read, and she better read, till she read all the
+letter, by which she came to know that Kate and her darling were trysted,
+and that this was not the first love-letter which had passed between
+them. She, therefore, tore it in pieces, and sent for me, and screamed
+for Kate; in short, went, as it were, off at the head, and was neither to
+bind nor to hold on account of this intrigue, as she, in her wrath,
+stigmatised the innocent gallanting of poor Kate and the young laird.
+
+I listened in patience to all she had to say anent the discovery, and
+offered her the very best advice; but she derided my judgment; and
+because I would not speak outright to Mr. Lorimore, and get him to marry
+Kate off hand, she bade me good-night with an air, and sent for him
+herself. He, however, was on the brink of marriage with his present
+worthy helpmate, and declined her ladyship’s proposals, which angered her
+still more. But although there was surely a great lack of discretion in
+all this, and her ladyship was entirely overcome with her passion, she
+would not part with Kate, nor allow her to quit the house with me, but
+made her sup with her as usual that night, calling her sometimes a
+perfidious baggage, and at other times, forgetting her delirium, speaking
+to her as kindly as ever. At night, Kate as usual helped her ladyship
+into her bed, (this she told me with tears in her eyes next morning;) and
+when Lady Macadam, as was her wont, bent to kiss her for good-night, she
+suddenly recollected “the intrigue,” and gave Kate such a slap on the
+side of the head, as quite dislocated for a time the intellects of the
+poor young lassie. Next morning, Kate was solemnly advised never to
+write again to the laird, while the lady wrote him a letter, which, she
+said, would be as good as a birch to the breech of the boy. Nothing,
+therefore, for some time, indeed, throughout the year, came of the
+matter; but her ladyship, when Mrs. Balwhidder soon after called on her,
+said that I was a nose-of-wax, and that she never would speak to me
+again, which surely was not a polite thing to say to Mrs. Balwhidder, my
+second wife.
+
+This stramash was the first time I had interposed in the family concerns
+of my people; for it was against my nature to make or meddle with private
+actions saving only such as in course of nature came before the session;
+but I was not satisfied with the principles of Lady Macadam, and I began
+to be weary about Kate Malcolm’s situation with her ladyship, whose ways
+of thinking I saw were not to be depended on, especially in those things
+wherein her pride and vanity were concerned. But the time ran on—the
+butterflies and the blossoms were succeeded by the leaves and the fruit,
+and nothing of a particular nature farther molested the general
+tranquillity of this year; about the end of which, there came on a sudden
+frost, after a tack of wet weather. The roads were just a sheet of ice,
+like a frozen river; insomuch that the coal-carts could not work; and one
+of our cows, (Mrs. Balwhidder said, after the accident, it was our best;
+but it was not so much thought of before,) fell in coming from the glebe
+to the byre, and broke its two hinder legs, which obligated us to kill
+it, in order to put the beast out of pain. As this happened after we had
+salted our mart, it occasioned us to have a double crop of puddings, and
+such a show of hams in the kitchen, as was a marvel to our visitors to
+see.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII
+YEAR 1772
+
+
+ON New-Year’s night, this year, a thing happened, which, in its own
+nature, was a trifle; but it turned out as a mustard-seed that grows into
+a great tree. One of the elders, who has long been dead and gone, came
+to the manse about a fact that was found out in the clachan, and after we
+had discoursed on it some time, he rose to take his departure. I went
+with him to the door with the candle in my hand—it was a clear frosty
+night, with a sharp wind; and the moment I opened the door, the blast
+blew out the candle, so that I heedlessly, with the candlestick in my
+hand, walked with him to the yett without my hat, by which I took a sore
+cold in my head, that brought on a dreadful toothache; insomuch, that I
+was obligated to go into Irville to get the tooth drawn, and this caused
+my face to swell to such a fright, that, on the Sabbath-day, I could not
+preach to my people. There was, however, at that time, a young man, one
+Mr. Heckletext, tutor in Sir Hugh Montgomerie’s family, and who had
+shortly before been licensed. Finding that I would not be able to preach
+myself, I sent to him, and begged he would officiate for me, which he
+very pleasantly consented to do, being, like all the young clergy,
+thirsting to show his light to the world. ’Twixt the fore and
+afternoon’s worship, he took his check of dinner at the manse, and I
+could not but say that he seemed both discreet and sincere. Judge,
+however, what was brewing, when the same night Mr. Lorimore came and told
+me, that Mr. Heckletext was the suspected person anent the fact that had
+been instrumental, in the hand of a chastising Providence, to afflict me
+with the toothache, in order, as it afterwards came to pass, to bring the
+hidden hypocrisy of the ungodly preacher to light. It seems that the
+donsie lassie who was in fault, had gone to the kirk in the afternoon,
+and seeing who was in the pulpit, where she expected to see me, was
+seized with the hysterics, and taken with her crying on the spot, the
+which being untimely, proved the death of both mother and bairn, before
+the thing was properly laid to the father’s charge.
+
+ [Picture: The Precentor]
+
+This caused a great uproar in the parish. I was sorely blamed to let
+such a man as Mr. Heckletext go up into my pulpit, although I was as
+ignorant of his offences as the innocent child that perished; and, in an
+unguarded hour, to pacify some of the elders, who were just distracted
+about the disgrace, I consented to have him called before the session.
+He obeyed the call, and in a manner that I will never forget; for he was
+a sorrow of sin and audacity, and demanded to know why, and for what
+reason, he was summoned. I told him the whole affair in my calm and
+moderate way; but it was oil cast upon a burning coal. He flamed up in a
+terrible passion; threepit at the elders that they had no proof whatever
+of his having had any trafficking in the business, which was the case;
+for it was only a notion, the poor deceased lassie never having made a
+disclosure: called them libellous conspirators against his character,
+which was his only fortune, and concluded by threatening to punish them,
+though he exempted me from the injury which their slanderous insinuations
+had done to his prospects in life. We were all terrified, and allowed
+him to go away without uttering a word; and sure enough he did bring a
+plea in the courts of Edinburgh against Mr. Lorimore and the elders for
+damages, laid at a great sum.
+
+What might have been the consequence, no one can tell; but soon after he
+married Sir Hugh’s house-keeper, and went with her into Edinburgh, where
+he took up a school; and, before the trial came on, that is to say,
+within three months of the day that I myself married them, Mrs.
+Heckletext was delivered of a thriving lad bairn, which would have been a
+witness for the elders, had the worst come to the worst. This was,
+indeed, we all thought, a joyous deliverance to the parish, and it was a
+lesson to me never to allow any preacher to mount my pulpit, unless I
+knew something of his moral character.
+
+In other respects, this year passed very peaceably in the parish: there
+was a visible increase of worldly circumstances, and the hedges which had
+been planted along the toll-road, began to put forth their branches, and
+to give new notions of orderlyness and beauty to the farmers. Mrs.
+Malcolm heard from time to time from her son Charles, on board the
+man-of-war the _Avenger_, where he was midshipman; and he had found a
+friend in the captain, that was just a father to him. Her second son,
+Robert, being out of his time at Irville, went to the Clyde to look for a
+berth, and was hired to go to Jamaica, in a ship called the _Trooper_.
+He was a lad of greater sobriety of nature than Charles; douce, honest,
+and faithful; and when he came home, though he brought no limes to me to
+make punch, like his brother, he brought a Muscovy duck to Lady Macadam,
+who had, as I have related, in a manner educated his sister Kate. That
+duck was the first of the kind we had ever seen, and many thought it was
+of the goose species, only with short bowly legs. It was, however, a
+tractable and homely beast; and after some confabulation, as my lady
+herself told Mrs. Balwhidder, it was received into fellowship by her
+other ducks and poultry. It is not, however, so much on account of the
+rarity of the creature, that I have introduced it here, as for the
+purpose of relating a wonderful operation that was performed on it by
+Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress.
+
+There happened to be a sack of beans in our stable, and Lady Macadam’s
+hens and fowls, which were not overly fed at home through the inattention
+of her servants, being great stravaigers for their meat, in passing the
+door went in to pick, and the Muscovy, seeing a hole in the bean-sack,
+dabbled out a crapful before she was disturbed. The beans swelled on the
+poor bird’s stomach, and her crap bellied out like the kyte of a Glasgow
+magistrate, until it was just a sight to be seen with its head back on
+its shoulders. The bairns of the clachan followed it up and down,
+crying, the lady’s muckle jock’s aye growing bigger, till every heart was
+wae for the creature. Some thought it was afflicted with a tympathy, and
+others, that it was the natural way for such-like ducks to cleck their
+young. In short, we were all concerned; and my lady, having a great
+opinion of Miss Sabrina’s skill, had a consultation with her on the case,
+at which Miss Sabrina advised, that what she called the Cæsarean
+operation should be tried, which she herself performed accordingly, by
+opening the creature’s crap, and taking out as many beans as filled a
+mutchkin stoup, after which she sewed it up, and the Muscovy went its way
+to the water-side, and began to swim, and was as jocund as ever;
+insomuch, that in three days after it was quite cured of all the
+consequences of its surfeit.
+
+I had at one time a notion to send an account of this to the _Scots
+Magazine_, but something always came in the way to prevent me; so that it
+has been reserved for a place in this chronicle, being, after Mr.
+Heckletext’s affair, the most memorable thing in our history of this
+year.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV
+YEAR 1773
+
+
+IN this Ann. Dom. there was something like a plea getting to a head,
+between the session and some of the heritors, about a new school-house;
+the thatch having been torn from the rigging of the old one by a blast of
+wind, on the first Monday of February, by which a great snow storm got
+admission, and the school was rendered utterly uninhabitable. The
+smaller sort of lairds were very willing to come into the plan with an
+extra contribution, because they respected the master, and their bairns
+were at the school; but the gentlemen, who had tutors in their own
+houses, were not so manageable; and some of them even went so far as to
+say, that the kirk, being only wanted on Sunday, would do very well for a
+school all the rest of the week, which was a very profane way of
+speaking; and I was resolved to set myself against any such thing, and to
+labour, according to the power and efficacy of my station, to get a new
+school built.
+
+Many a meeting the session had on the subject; and the heritors debated,
+and discussed, and revised their proceedings, and still no money for the
+needful work was forthcoming. Whereupon it happened one morning, as I
+was rummaging in my scrutoire, that I laid my hand on the Lord
+Eaglesham’s letter anent Charles Malcolm; and it was put into my head at
+that moment, that if I was to write to his lordship, who was the greatest
+heritor, and owned now the major part of the parish, that by his help and
+influence I might be an instrument to the building of a comfortable new
+school. Accordingly, I sat down and wrote my lord all about the
+accident, and the state of the school-house, and the divisions and
+seditions among the heritors, and sent the letter to him at London by the
+post the same day, without saying a word to any living soul on the
+subject.
+
+This in me was an advised thought; for, by the return of post, his
+lordship with his own hand, in a most kind manner, authorized me to say
+that he would build a new school at his own cost, and bade me go over and
+consult about it with his steward at the castle, to whom he had written
+by the same post the necessary instructions. Nothing could exceed the
+gladness which the news gave to the whole parish, and none said more in
+behalf of his lordship’s bounty and liberality than the heritors;
+especially those gentry who grudged the undertaking, when it was thought
+that it would have to come out of their own pock-nook.
+
+In the course of the summer, just as the roof was closing in of the
+school-house, my lord came to the castle with a great company, and was
+not there a day till he sent for me to come over, on the next Sunday, to
+dine with him; but I sent him word that I could not do so, for it would
+be a transgression of the Sabbath, which made him send his own gentleman,
+to make his apology for having taken so great a liberty with me, and to
+beg me to come on the Monday, which I accordingly did, and nothing could
+be better than the discretion with which I was used. There was a vast
+company of English ladies and gentlemen, and his lordship, in a most
+jocose manner, told them all how he had fallen on the midden, and how I
+had clad him in my clothes, and there was a wonder of laughing and
+diversion; but the most particular thing in the company, was a large,
+round-faced man, with a wig, that was a dignitary in some great
+Episcopalian church in London, who was extraordinary condescending
+towards me, drinking wine with me at the table, and saying weighty
+sentences, in a fine style of language, about the becoming grace of
+simplicity and innocence of heart, in the clergy of all denominations of
+Christians, which I was pleased to hear; for really he had a proud red
+countenance, and I could not have thought he was so mortified to humility
+within, had I not heard with what sincerity he delivered himself, and
+seen how much reverence and attention was paid to him by all present,
+particularly by my lord’s chaplain, who was a pious and pleasant young
+divine, though educated at Oxford for the Episcopalian persuasion.
+
+One day, soon after, as I was sitting in my closet conning a sermon for
+the next Sunday, I was surprised by a visit from the dean, as the
+dignitary was called. He had come, he said, to wait on me as rector of
+the parish—for so, it seems, they call a pastor in England—and to say,
+that, if it was agreeable, he would take a family dinner with us before
+he left the castle. I could make no objection to this kindness; but said
+I hoped my lord would come with him, and that we would do our best to
+entertain them with all suitable hospitality. About an hour or so after
+he had returned to the castle, one of the flunkeys brought a letter from
+his lordship, to say, that not only he would come with the dean, but that
+they would bring his other guests with them; and that, as they could only
+drink London wine, the butler would send me a hamper in the morning,
+assured, as he was pleased to say, that Mrs. Balwhidder would otherwise
+provide good cheer.
+
+This notification, however, was a great trouble to my wife, who was only
+used to manufacture the produce of our glebe and yard to a profitable
+purpose, and not used to the treatment of deans and lords, and other
+persons of quality. However, she was determined to stretch a point on
+this occasion; and we had, as all present declared, a charming dinner;
+for fortunately one of the sows had a litter of pigs a few days before,
+and in addition to a goose, that is but a boss bird, we had a roasted pig
+with an apple in its mouth, which was just a curiosity to see; and my
+lord called it a tithe pig; but I told him it was one of Mrs.
+Balwhidder’s own clecking, which saying of mine made no little sport when
+expounded to the dean.
+
+But, och how! this was the last happy summer that we had for many a year
+in the parish; and an omen of the dule that ensued, was in a sacrilegious
+theft that a daft woman, Jenny Gaffaw, and her idiot daughter, did in the
+kirk, by tearing off and stealing the green serge lining of my lord’s
+pew, to make, as they said, a hap for their shoulders in the cold
+weather—saving, however, the sin, we paid no attention at the time to the
+mischief and tribulation that so unheard-of a trespass boded to us all.
+It took place about Yule, when the weather was cold and frosty, and poor
+Jenny was not very able to go about seeking her meat as usual. The deed,
+however, was mainly done by her daughter, who, when brought before me,
+said, “her poor mother’s back had mair need of claes than the
+kirk-boards;” which was so true a thing, that I could not punish her, but
+wrote anent it to my lord, who not only overlooked the offence, but sent
+orders to the servants at the castle to be kind to the poor woman, and
+the natural, her daughter.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XV
+YEAR 1774
+
+
+WHEN I look back on this year, and compare what happened therein with the
+things that had gone before, I am grieved to the heart, and pressed down
+with an afflicted spirit. We had, as may be read, trials and
+tribulations in the days that were past; and in the rank and boisterous
+times of the smuggling there was much sin and blemish among us, but
+nothing so dark and awful as what fell out in the course of this unhappy
+year. The evil omen of daft Jenny Gaffaw and her daughter’s sacrilege,
+had soon a bloody verification.
+
+About the beginning of the month of March in this year, the war in
+America was kindling so fast that the government was obligated to send
+soldiers over the sea, in the hope to quell the rebellious temper of the
+plantations; and a party of a regiment that was quartered at Ayr was
+ordered to march to Greenock, to be there shipped off. The men were wild
+and wicked profligates, without the fear of the Lord before their eyes;
+and some of them had drawn up with light women in Ayr, who followed them
+on their march. This the soldiers did not like, not wishing to be
+troubled with such gear in America; so the women, when they got the
+length of Kilmarnock, were ordered to retreat and go home, which they all
+did but one Jean Glaikit, who persisted in her intent to follow her joe,
+Patrick O’Neil, a Catholic Irish corporal. The man did, as he said, all
+in his capacity to persuade her to return, but she was a contumacious
+limmer, and would not listen to reason; so that, in passing along our
+toll-road, from less to more, the miserable wretches fell out, and
+fought, and the soldier put an end to her with a hasty knock on the head
+with his firelock, and marched on after his comrades.
+
+The body of the woman was, about half an hour after, found by the
+scholars of Mr. Lorimore’s school, who had got the play to see the
+marching, and to hear the drums of the soldiers. Dreadful was the shout
+and the cry throughout the parish at this foul work. Some of the farmer
+lads followed the soldiers on horseback, and others ran to Sir Hugh, who
+was a justice of the peace, for his advice.—Such a day as that was!
+
+However, the murderer was taken, and, with his arms tied behind him with
+a cord, he was brought back to the parish, where he confessed before Sir
+Hugh the deed, and how it happened. He was then put in a cart, and,
+being well guarded by six of the lads, was taken to Ayr jail.
+
+It was not long after this that the murderer was brought to trial, and,
+being found guilty on his own confession, he was sentenced to be
+executed, and his body to be hung in chains near the spot where the deed
+was done. I thought that all in the parish would have run to desperation
+with horror when the news of this came, and I wrote immediately to the
+Lord Eaglesham to get this done away by the merciful power of the
+government, which he did, to our great solace and relief.
+
+In the autumn, the young Laird Macadam, being ordered with his regiment
+for the Americas, got leave from the king to come and see his lady
+mother, before his departure. But it was not to see her only, as will
+presently appear.
+
+Knowing how much her ladyship was averse to the notion he had of Kate
+Malcolm, he did not write of his coming, lest she would send Kate out of
+the way, but came in upon them at a late hour, as they were wasting their
+precious time, as was the nightly wont of my lady, with a pack of cards;
+and so far was she from being pleased to see him, that no sooner did she
+behold his face, but, like a tap of tow, she kindled upon both him and
+Kate, and ordered them out of her sight and house. The young folk had
+discretion: Kate went home to her mother, and the laird came to the
+manse, and begged us to take him in. He then told me what had happened;
+and that, having bought a captain’s commission, he was resolved to marry
+Kate, and hoped I would perform the ceremony, if her mother would
+consent. “As for mine,” said he, “she will never agree; but, when the
+thing is done, her pardon will not be difficult to get; for, with all her
+whims and caprice, she is generous and affectionate.” In short, he so
+wiled and beguiled me, that I consented to marry them, if Mrs. Malcolm
+was agreeable. “I will not disobey my mother,” said he, “by asking her
+consent, which I know she will refuse; and, therefore, the sooner it is
+done the better.” So we then stepped over to Mrs. Malcolm’s house, where
+we found that saintly woman, with Kate and Effie, and Willie, sitting
+peacefully at their fireside, preparing to read their Bibles for the
+night. When we went in, and when I saw Kate, that was so ladylike there,
+with the decent humility of her parent’s dwelling, I could not but think
+she was destined for a better station; and when I looked at the captain,
+a handsome youth, I thought surely their marriage is made in heaven; and
+so I said to Mrs. Malcolm, who after a time consented, and likewise
+agreed that her daughter should go with the captain to America; for her
+faith and trust in the goodness of Providence was great and boundless,
+striving, as it were, to be even with its tender mercies. Accordingly,
+the captain’s man was sent to bid the chaise wait that had taken him to
+the lady’s, and the marriage was sanctified by me before we left Mrs.
+Malcolm’s. No doubt, they ought to have been proclaimed three several
+Sabbaths; but I satisfied the session, at our first meeting, on account
+of the necessity of the case. The young couple went in the chaise
+travelling to Glasgow, authorising me to break the matter to Lady
+Macadam, which was a sore task; but I was spared from the performance.
+For her ladyship had come to herself, and thinking on her own rashness in
+sending away Kate and the captain in the way she had done, she was like
+one by herself. All the servants were scattered out and abroad in quest
+of the lovers; and some of them, seeing the chaise drive from Mrs.
+Malcolm’s door with them in it, and me coming out, jealoused what had
+been done, and told their mistress outright of the marriage, which was to
+her like a clap of thunder; insomuch that she flung herself back in her
+settee, and was beating and drumming with her heels on the floor, like a
+madwoman in Bedlam, when I entered the room. For some time she took no
+notice of me, but continued her din; but, by-and-by, she began to turn
+her eyes in fiery glances upon me, till I was terrified lest she would
+fly at me with her claws in her fury. At last she stopped all at once,
+and in a calm voice, said, “But it cannot now be helped, where are the
+vagabonds?”—“They are gone,” replied I.—“Gone?” cried she, “gone
+where?”—“To America, I suppose,” was my answer; upon which she again
+threw herself back in the settee, and began again to drum and beat with
+her feet as before. But not to dwell on small particularities, let it
+suffice to say, that she sent her coachman on one of her coach horses,
+which, being old and stiff, did not overtake the fugitives till they were
+in their bed at Kilmarnock, where they stopped that night; but when they
+came back to the lady’s in the morning, she was as cagey and meikle taken
+up with them, as if they had gotten her full consent and privilege to
+marry from the first. Thus was the first of Mrs. Malcolm’s children well
+and creditably settled. I have only now to conclude with observing, that
+my son Gilbert was seized with the smallpox about the beginning of
+December, and was blinded by them for seventeen days; for the inoculation
+was not in practice yet among us, saving only in the genteel families
+that went into Edinburgh for the education of their children, where it
+was performed by the faculty there.
+
+ [Picture: Kate]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVI
+YEAR 1775
+
+
+THE regular course of nature is calm and orderly, and tempests and
+troubles are but lapses from the accustomed sobriety with which
+Providence works out the destined end of all things. From Yule till
+Pace-Monday there had been a gradual subsidence of our personal and
+parochial tribulations, and the spring, though late, set in bright and
+beautiful, and was accompanied with the spirit of contentment; so that,
+excepting the great concern that we all began to take in the American
+rebellion, especially on account of Charles Malcolm that was in the
+man-of-war, and of Captain Macadam that had married Kate, we had
+throughout the better half of the year but little molestation of any
+sort. I should, however, note the upshot of the marriage.
+
+By some cause that I do not recollect, if I ever had it properly told,
+the regiment wherein the captain had bought his commission was not sent
+to the plantations, but only over to Ireland, by which the captain and
+his lady were allowed to prolong their stay in the parish with his
+mother; and he, coming of age while he was among us, in making a
+settlement on his wife, bought the house at the Braehead, which was then
+just built by Thomas Shivers the mason, and he gave that house, with a
+judicious income, to Mrs. Malcolm, telling her that it was not becoming,
+he having it in his power to do the contrary, that she should any longer
+be dependent on her own industry. For this the young man got a name like
+a sweet odour in all the country side; but that whimsical and prelatic
+lady his mother, just went out of all bounds, and played such pranks for
+an old woman, as cannot be told. To her daughter-in-law, however, she
+was wonderful kind; and, in fitting her out for going with the captain to
+Dublin, it was extraordinary to hear what a paraphernalia she provided
+her with. But who could have thought that in this kindness a sore trial
+was brewing for me!
+
+It happened that Miss Betty Wudrife, the daughter of an heritor, had been
+on a visit to some of her friends in Edinburgh; and being in at
+Edinburgh, she came out with a fine mantle, decked and adorned with many
+a ribbon-knot, such as had never been seen in the parish. The Lady
+Macadam, hearing of this grand mantle, sent to beg Miss Betty to lend it
+to her, to make a copy for young Mrs. Macadam. But Miss Betty was so
+vogie with her gay mantle, that she sent back word, it would be making it
+o’er common; which so nettled the old courtly lady, that she vowed
+revenge, and said the mantle would not be long seen on Miss Betty.
+Nobody knew the meaning of her words; but she sent privately for Miss
+Sabrina, the schoolmistress, who was aye proud of being invited to my
+lady’s, where she went on the Sabbath night to drink tea, and read
+Thomson’s _Seasons_ and Hervey’s _Meditations_ for her ladyship’s
+recreation. Between the two, a secret plot was laid against Miss Betty
+and her Edinburgh mantle; and Miss Sabrina, in a very treacherous manner,
+for the which I afterwards chided her severely, went to Miss Betty, and
+got a sight of the mantle, and how it was made, and all about it, until
+she was in a capacity to make another like it; by which my lady and her,
+from old silk and satin negligées which her ladyship had worn at the
+French court, made up two mantles of the selfsame fashion as Miss
+Betty’s, and, if possible, more sumptuously garnished, but in a flagrant
+fool way. On the Sunday morning after, her ladyship sent for Jenny
+Gaffaw, and her daft daughter Meg, and showed them the mantles, and said
+she would give then half-a-crown if they would go with them to the kirk,
+and take their place in the bench beside the elders, and, after worship,
+walk home before Miss Betty Wudrife. The two poor natural things were
+just transported with the sight of such bravery, and needed no other
+bribe; so, over their bits of ragged duds, they put on the pageantry, and
+walked away to the kirk like peacocks, and took their place on the bench,
+to the great diversion of the whole congregation.
+
+I had no suspicion of this, and had prepared an affecting discourse about
+the horrors of war, in which I touched, with a tender hand, on the
+troubles that threatened families and kindred in America; but all the
+time I was preaching, doing my best, and expatiating till the tears came
+into my eyes, I could not divine what was the cause of the inattention of
+my people. But the two vain haverels were on the bench under me, and I
+could not see them; where they sat, spreading their feathers and picking
+their wings, stroking down and setting right their finery; with such an
+air as no living soul could see and withstand; while every eye in the
+kirk was now on them, and now at Miss Betty Wudrife, who was in a worse
+situation than if she had been on the stool of repentance.
+
+Greatly grieved with the little heed that was paid to my discourse, I
+left the pulpit with a heavy heart; but when I came out into the
+kirkyard, and saw the two antics linking like ladies, and aye keeping in
+the way before Miss Betty, and looking back and around in their pride and
+admiration, with high heads and a wonderful pomp, I was really overcome,
+and could not keep my gravity, but laughed loud out among the graves, and
+in the face of all my people; who, seeing how I was vanquished in that
+unguarded moment by my enemy, made a universal and most unreverent breach
+of all decorum, at which Miss Betty, who had been the cause of all, ran
+into the first open door, and almost fainted away with mortification.
+
+This affair was regarded by the elders as a sinful trespass on the
+orderlyness that was needful in the Lord’s house; and they called on me
+at the manse that night, and said it would be a guilty connivance if I
+did not rebuke and admonish Lady Macadam of the evil of her way; for they
+had questioned daft Jenny, and had got at the bottom of the whole plot
+and mischief. But I, who knew her ladyship’s light way, would fain have
+had the elders to overlook it, rather than expose myself to her tantrums;
+but they considered the thing as a great scandal, so I was obligated to
+conform to their wishes. I might, however, have as well stayed at home,
+for her ladyship was in one of her jocose humours when I went to speak to
+her on the subject; and it was so far from my power to make a proper
+impression on her of the enormity that had been committed, that she made
+me laugh, in spite of my reason, at the fantastical drollery of her
+malicious prank on Miss Betty Wudrife.
+
+It, however, did not end here; for the session, knowing that it was
+profitless to speak to the daft mother and daughter, who had been the
+instruments, gave orders to Willy Howking, the betheral, not to let them
+again so far into the kirk; and Willy, having scarcely more sense than
+them both, thought proper to keep them out next Sunday altogether. The
+twa said nothing at the time, but the adversary was busy with them; for,
+on the Wednesday following, there being a meeting of the synod at Ayr, to
+my utter amazement the mother and daughter made their appearance there in
+all their finery, and raised a complaint against me and the session, for
+debarring them from church privileges. No stage play could have produced
+such an effect. I was perfectly dumfoundered; and every member of the
+synod might have been tied with a straw, they were so overcome with this
+new device of that endless woman, when bent on provocation—the Lady
+Macadam; in whom the saying was verified, that old folk are twice bairns;
+for in such plays, pranks, and projects, she was as playrife as a very
+lassie at her sampler; and this is but a swatch to what lengths she would
+go. The complaint was dismissed, by which the session and me were
+assoilzied; but I’ll never forget till the day of my death what I
+suffered on that occasion, to be so put to the wall by two born idiots.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVII
+YEAR 1776
+
+
+IT belongs to the chroniclers of the realm to describe the damage and
+detriment which fell on the power and prosperity of the kingdom, by
+reason of the rebellion, that was fired into open war, against the name
+and authority of the king in the plantations of America; for my task is
+to describe what happened within the narrow bound of the pasturage of the
+Lord’s flock, of which, in his bounty and mercy, he made me the humble,
+willing, but alas! the weak and ineffectual shepherd.
+
+About the month of February, a recruiting party came to our neighbour
+town of Irville, to beat up for men to be soldiers against the rebels;
+and thus the battle was brought, as it were, to our gates; for the very
+first man that took on with them was one Thomas Wilson, a cottar in our
+clachan, who, up to that time, had been a decent and creditable
+character. He was at first a farmer lad, but had forgathered with a
+doited tawpy, whom he married, and had offspring three or four. For some
+time it was noticed that he had a down and thoughtful look, that his
+cleeding was growing bare, and that his wife kept an untrig house, which,
+it was feared by many, was the cause of Thomas going o’er often to the
+change-house; he was, in short, during the greater part of the winter,
+evidently a man foregone in the pleasures of this world, which made all
+that knew him compassionate his situation.
+
+No doubt, it was his household ills that burdened him past bearing, and
+made him go into Irville, when he heard of the recruiting, and take on to
+be a soldier. Such a wally-wallying as the news of this caused at every
+door; for the red-coats—from the persecuting days, when the black-cuffs
+rampaged through the country—soldiers that fought for hire were held in
+dread and as a horror among us, and terrible were the stories that were
+told of their cruelty and sinfulness; indeed, there had not been wanting
+in our time a sample of what they were, as witness the murder of Jean
+Glaikit by Patrick O’Neil, the Irish corporal, anent which I have treated
+at large in the memorables of the year 1774.
+
+A meeting of the session was forthwith held; for here was Thomas Wilson’s
+wife and all his weans, an awful cess, thrown upon the parish; and it was
+settled outright among us, that Mr. Docken, who was then an elder, but is
+since dead, a worthy man, with a soft tongue and a pleasing manner,
+should go to Irville, and get Thomas, if possible, released from the
+recruiters. But it was all in vain; the sergeant would not listen to
+him, for Thomas was a strapping lad; nor would the poor infatuated man
+himself agree to go back, but cursed like a cadger, and swore that, if he
+stayed any longer among his plagues, he would commit some rash act; so we
+were saddled with his family, which was the first taste and preeing of
+what war is when it comes into our hearths, and among the breadwinners.
+
+The evil, however, did not stop here. Thomas, when he was dressed out in
+the king’s clothes, came over to see his bairns, and take a farewell of
+his friends, and he looked so gallant, that the very next market-day
+another lad of the parish listed with him; but he was a ramplor, roving
+sort of a creature, and, upon the whole, it was thought he did well for
+the parish when he went to serve the king.
+
+The listing was a catching distemper. Before the summer was over, the
+other three of the farming lads went off with the drum, and there was a
+wailing in the parish, which made me preach a touching discourse. I
+likened the parish to a widow woman with a small family, sitting in her
+cottage by the fireside, herself spinning with an eident wheel, ettling
+her best to get them a bit and a brat, and the poor weans all canty about
+the hearthstane—the little ones at their playocks, and the elder at their
+tasks—the callans working with hooks and lines to catch them a meal of
+fish in the morning—and the lassies working stockings to sell at the next
+Marymas fair.—And then I likened war to a calamity coming among them—the
+callans drowned at their fishing—the lassies led to a misdoing—and the
+feckless wee bairns laid on the bed of sickness, and their poor forlorn
+mother sitting by herself at the embers of a cauldrife fire; her tow
+done, and no a bodle to buy more; drooping a silent and salt tear for her
+babies, and thinking of days that war gone, and, like Rachel weeping for
+her children, she would not be comforted. With this I concluded, for my
+own heart filled full with the thought, and there was a deep sob in the
+Church; verily it was Rachel weeping for her children.
+
+In the latter end of the year, the man-of-war, with Charles Malcolm in
+her, came to the tail of the Bank at Greenock, to press men as it was
+thought, and Charles got leave from his captain to come and see his
+mother; and he brought with him Mr. Howard, another midshipman, the son
+of a great parliament man in London, which, as we have tasted the sorrow,
+gave us some insight into the pomp of war, Charles was now grown up into
+a fine young man, rattling, light-hearted, and just a cordial of
+gladness, and his companion was every bit like him. They were dressed in
+their fine gold-laced garbs and nobody knew Charles when he came to the
+clachan, but all wondered, for they were on horseback, and rode to the
+house where his mother lived when he went away, but which was then
+occupied by Miss Sabrina and her school. Miss Sabrina had never seen
+Charles, but she had heard of him; and when he enquired for his mother,
+she guessed who he was, and showed him the way to the new house that the
+captain had bought for her.
+
+Miss Sabrina, who was a little overly perjink at times, behaved herself
+on this occasion with a true spirit, and gave her lassies the play
+immediately; so that the news of Charles’s return was spread by them like
+wildfire, and there was a wonderful joy in the whole town. When Charles
+had seen his mother, and his sister Effie, with that douce and
+well-mannered lad William, his brother—for of their meeting I cannot
+speak, not being present—he then came with his friend to see me at the
+manse, and was most jocose with me, and, in a way of great pleasance, got
+Mrs. Balwhidder to ask his friend to sleep at the manse. In short, we
+had just a ploy the whole two days they stayed with us, and I got leave
+from Lord Eaglesham’s steward to let them shoot on my lord’s land; and I
+believe every laddie wean in the parish attended them to the field. As
+for old Lady Macadam, Charles being, as she said, a near relation, and
+she having likewise some knowledge of his comrade’s family, she was just
+in her element with them, though they were but youths; for she a woman
+naturally of a fantastical, and, as I have narrated, given to comical
+devices, and pranks to a degree. She made for them a ball, to which she
+invited all the bonniest lassies, far and near, in the parish, and was
+out of the body with mirth, and had a fiddler from Irville; and it was
+thought by those that were there, that had she not been crippled with the
+rheumatics, she would have danced herself. But I was concerned to hear
+both Charles and his friend, like hungry hawks, rejoicing at the prospect
+of the war, hoping thereby, as soon as their midship term was out, to be
+made lieutenants; saving this, there was no allay in the happiness they
+brought with them to the parish, and it was a delight to see how auld and
+young of all degrees made of Charles; for we were proud of him, and none
+more than myself, though he began to take liberties with me, calling me
+old governor; it was, however, in a warm-hearted manner, only I did not
+like it when any of the elders heard. As for his mother, she deported
+herself like a saint on the occasion. There was a temperance in the
+pleasure of her heart, and in her thankfulness, that is past the compass
+of words to describe. Even Lady Macadam, who never could think a serious
+thought all her days, said, in her wild way that the gods had bestowed
+more care in the making of Mrs. Malcolm’s temper, than on the bodies and
+souls of all the saints in the calendar. On the Sunday the strangers
+attended divine worship, and I preached a sermon purposely for them, and
+enlarged at great length and fulness on how David overcame Goliath; and
+they both told me that they had never heard such a good discourse; but I
+do not think they were great judges of preachings. How, indeed, could
+Mr. Howard know anything of sound doctrine, being educated, as he told
+me, at Eton school, a prelatic establishment! Nevertheless, he was a
+fine lad; and though a little given to frolic and diversion, he had a
+principle of integrity, that afterwards kythed into much virtue; for,
+during this visit, he took a notion of Effie Malcolm, and the lassie of
+him, then a sprightly and blooming creature, fair to look upon, and
+blithe to see; and he kept up a correspondence with her till the war was
+over, when being a captain of a frigate, he came down among us, and they
+were married by me, as shall be related in its proper place.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVIII
+YEAR 1777
+
+
+THIS may well be called the year of the heavy heart, for we had sad
+tidings of the lads that went away as soldiers to America. First, there
+was a boding in the minds of all their friends that they were never to
+see them more; and their sadness, like a mist spreading from the waters
+and covering the fields, darkened the spirit of the neighbours.
+Secondly, a sound was bruited about that the king’s forces would have a
+hot and a sore struggle before the rebels were put down, if they were
+ever put down. Then came the cruel truth of all that the poor lads’
+friends had feared. But it is fit and proper that I should relate at
+length, under their several heads, the sorrows and afflictions as they
+came to pass.
+
+One evening, as I was taking my walk alone, meditating my discourse for
+the next Sabbath—it was shortly after Candlemas—it was a fine clear
+frosty evening, just as the sun was setting. Taking my walk alone, and
+thinking of the dreadfulness of Almighty power, and how that, if it was
+not tempered and restrained by infinite goodness, and wisdom, and mercy,
+the miserable sinner, man, and all things that live, would be in a woeful
+state, I drew near the beild where old Widow Mirkland lived by herself,
+who was grand-mother to Jock Hempy, the ramplor lad, that was the second
+who took on for a soldier. I did mind of this at the time; but, passing
+the house, I heard the croon, as it were, of a laden soul busy with the
+Lord, and, not to disturb the holy workings of grace, I paused and
+listened. It was old Mizy Mirkland herself, sitting at the gable of the
+house, looking at the sun setting in all his glory behind the Arran
+hills; but she was not praying—only moaning to herself—an oozing out, as
+it might be called, of the spirit from her heart, then grievously
+oppressed with sorrow, and heavy bodements of grey hairs and
+poverty.—“Yonder it slips awa’,” she was saying, “and my poor bairn,
+that’s o’er the seas in America, is maybe looking on its bright face,
+thinking of his hame, and aiblins of me, that did my best to breed him up
+in the fear of the Lord; but I couldna warsle wi’ what was ordained. Ay,
+Jock! as ye look at the sun gaun down, as many a time, when ye were a wee
+innocent laddie at my knee here, I hae bade ye look at him as a type of
+your Maker, ye will hae a sore heart; for ye hae left me in my need, when
+ye should hae been near at hand to help me, for the hard labour and
+industry with which I brought you up. But it’s the Lord’s will. Blessed
+be the name of the Lord, that makes us to thole the tribulations of this
+world, and will reward us, through the mediation of Jesus, hereafter.”
+She wept bitterly as she said this, for her heart was tried, but the
+blessing of a religious contentment was shed upon her; and I stepped up
+to her, and asked about her concerns, for, saving as a parishioner, and a
+decent old woman, I knew little of her. Brief was her story; but it was
+one of misfortune.—“But I will not complain,” she said, “of the measure
+that has been meted unto me. I was left myself an orphan; when I grew
+up, and was married to my gude-man, I had known but scant and want. Our
+days of felicity were few; and he was ta’en awa’ from me shortly after my
+Mary was born. A wailing baby, and a widow’s heart, was a’ he left me.
+I nursed her with my salt tears, and bred her in straits; but the favour
+of God was with us, and she grew up to womanhood as lovely as the rose,
+and as blameless as the lily. In her time she was married to a farming
+lad. There never was a brawer pair in the kirk, than on that day when
+they gaed there first as man and wife. My heart was proud, and it
+pleased the Lord to chastise my pride—to nip my happiness, even in the
+bud. The very next day he got his arm crushed. It never got well again;
+and he fell into a decay, and died in the winter, leaving my Mary far on
+in the road to be a mother.
+
+ [Picture: A morning consultation]
+
+“When her time drew near, we both happened to be working in the yard.
+She was delving to plant potatoes, and I told her it would do her hurt;
+but she was eager to provide something, as she said, for what might
+happen. Oh! it was an ill-omened word. The same night her trouble came
+on, and before the morning she was a cauld corpse, and another wee wee
+fatherless baby was greeting at my bosom—it was him that’s noo awa’ in
+America. He grew up to be a fine bairn, with a warm heart, but a light
+head, and, wanting the rein of a father’s power upon him, was no sa douce
+as I could have wished; but he was no man’s foe save his own. I thought,
+and hoped, as he grew to years of discretion, he would have sobered, and
+been a consolation to my old age; but he’s gone, and he’ll never come
+back—disappointment is my portion in this world, and I have no hope;
+while I can do, I will seek no help, but threescore and fifteen can do
+little, and a small ail is a great evil to an aged woman, who has but the
+distaff for her breadwinner.”
+
+I did all that I could to bid her be of good cheer, but the comfort of a
+hopeful spirit was dead within her; and she told me, that by many tokens
+she was assured her bairn was already slain.—“Thrice,” said she, “I have
+seen his wraith—the first time he was in the pride of his young manhood,
+the next he was pale and wan, with a bloody and gashy wound in his side,
+and the third time there was a smoke, and, when it cleared away, I saw
+him in a grave, with neither winding-sheet nor coffin.”
+
+The tale of this pious and resigned spirit dwelt in mine ear, and, when I
+went home, Mrs. Balwhidder thought that I had met with an o’ercome, and
+was very uneasy; so she got the tea soon ready to make me better; but
+scarcely had we tasted the first cup when a loud lamentation was heard in
+the kitchen. This was from that tawpy the wife of Thomas Wilson, with
+her three weans. They had been seeking their meat among the farmer
+houses, and, in coming home, forgathered on the road with the Glasgow
+carrier, who told them that news had come, in the _London Gazette_, of a
+battle, in which the regiment that Thomas had listed in was engaged, and
+had suffered loss both in rank and file; none doubting that their head
+was in the number of the slain, the whole family grat aloud, and came to
+the manse, bewailing him as no more; and it afterwards turned out to be
+the case, making it plain to me that there is a farseeing discernment in
+the spirit, that reaches beyond the scope of our incarnate senses.
+
+But the weight of the war did not end with these afflictions; for,
+instead of the sorrow that the listing caused, and the anxiety after, and
+the grief of the bloody tidings, operating as wholesome admonition to our
+young men, the natural perversity of the human heart was more and more
+manifested. A wonderful interest was raised among us all to hear of what
+was going on in the world; insomuch, that I myself was no longer
+contented with the relation of the news of the month in the _Scots
+Magazine_, but joined with my father-in-law, Mr. Kibbock, to get a
+newspaper twice a-week from Edinburgh. As for Lady Macadam, who being
+naturally an impatient woman, she had one sent to her three times a-week
+from London, so that we had something fresh five times every week; and
+the old papers were lent out to the families who had friends in the wars.
+This was done on my suggestion, hoping it would make all content with
+their peaceable lot; but dominion for a time had been given to the power
+of contrariness, and it had quite an opposite effect. It begot a
+curiosity, egging on to enterprise; and, greatly to my sorrow, three of
+the brawest lads in the parish, or in any parish, all in one day took on
+with a party of the Scots Greys that were then lying in Ayr; and nothing
+would satisfy the callans at Mr. Lorimore’s school, but, instead of their
+innocent plays with girs, and shinties, and sicklike, they must go
+ranking like soldiers, and fight sham-fights in bodies. In short, things
+grew to a perfect hostility, for a swarm of weans came out from the
+schools of Irville on a Saturday afternoon, and, forgathering with ours,
+they had a battle with stones on the toll-road, such as was dreadful to
+hear of; for many a one got a mark that day he will take to the grave
+with him.
+
+It was not, however, by accidents of the field only, that we were
+afflicted; those of the flood, too, were sent likewise against us. In
+the month of October, when the corn was yet in the holms, and on the cold
+land by the river side, the water of Irville swelled to a great spait,
+from bank to brae, sweeping all before it, and roaring, in its might,
+like an agent of divine displeasure, sent forth to punish the inhabitants
+of the earth. The loss of the victual was a thing reparable, and those
+that suffered did not greatly complain; for, in other respects, their
+harvest had been plenteous: but the river, in its fury, not content with
+overflowing the lands, burst through the sandy hills with a raging force,
+and a riving asunder of the solid ground, as when the fountains of the
+great deep were broken up. All in the parish was a-foot, and on the
+hills, some weeping and wringing their hands, not knowing what would
+happen, when they beheld the landmarks of the waters deserted, and the
+river breaking away through the country, like the war-horse set loose in
+his pasture, and glorying in his might. By this change in the way and
+channel of the river, all the mills in our parish were left more than
+half a mile from dam or lade; and the farmers through the whole winter,
+till the new mills were built, had to travel through a heavy road with
+their victual, which was a great grievance, and added not a little to the
+afflictions of this unhappy year, which to me were not without a
+particularity, by the death of a full cousin of Mrs. Balwhidder, my first
+wife; she was grievously burnt by looting over a candle. Her mutch,
+which was of the high structure then in vogue, took fire, and being
+fastened with corking-pins to a great toupee, it could not be got off
+until she had sustained a deadly injury, of which, after lingering long,
+she was kindly eased by her removal from trouble. This sore accident was
+to me a matter of deep concern and cogitation; but as it happened in
+Tarbolton, and no in our parish, I have only alluded to it to show, that
+when my people were chastised by the hand of Providence, their pastor was
+not spared, but had a drop from the same vial.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIX
+YEAR 1778
+
+
+THIS year was as the shadow of the bygane: there was less actual
+suffering, but what we came through cast a gloom among us, and we did not
+get up our spirits till the spring was far advanced; the corn was in the
+ear, and the sun far towards midsummer height, before there was any
+regular show of gladness in the parish.
+
+It was clear to me that the wars were not to be soon over; for I noticed,
+in the course of this year, that there was a greater christening of lad
+bairns than had ever been in any year during my incumbency; and grave and
+wise persons, observant of the signs of the times, said, that it had been
+long held as a sure prognostication of war, when the births of male
+children outnumbered that of females.
+
+Our chief misfortune in this year was a revival of that wicked mother of
+many mischiefs, the smuggling trade, which concerned me greatly; but it
+was not allowed to it to make any thing like a permanent stay among us,
+though in some of the neighbouring parishes, its ravages, both in morals
+and property, were very distressing, and many a mailing was sold to pay
+for the triumphs of the cutters and gaugers; for the government was by
+this time grown more eager, and the war caused the king’s ships to be out
+and about, which increased the trouble of the smugglers, whose wits in
+their turn were thereby much sharpened.
+
+After Mrs. Malcolm, by the settlement of Captain Macadam, had given up
+her dealing, two maiden women, that were sisters, Betty and Janet Pawkie,
+came in among us from Ayr, where they had friends in league with some of
+the laigh land folk, that carried on the contraband with the Isle of Man,
+which was the very eye of the smuggling. They took up the tea-selling,
+which Mrs. Malcolm had dropped, and did business on a larger scale,
+having a general huxtry, with parliament-cakes, and candles, and
+pincushions, as well as other groceries, in their window. Whether they
+had any contraband dealings, or were only back-bitten, I cannot take it
+upon me to say; but it was jealoused in the parish that the meal in the
+sacks, that came to their door at night, and was sent to the Glasgow
+market in the morning, was not made of corn. They were, however, decent
+women, both sedate and orderly; the eldest, Betty Pawkie, was of a manly
+stature, and had a long beard, which made her have a coarse look; but she
+was, nevertheless, a worthy, well-doing creature, and at her death she
+left ten pounds to the poor of the parish, as may be seen in the
+mortification board that the session put up in the kirk as a
+testification and an example.
+
+Shortly after the revival of the smuggling, an exciseman was put among
+us, and the first was Robin Bicker, a very civil lad that had been a
+flunkey with Sir Hugh Montgomerie, when he was a residenter in Edinburgh,
+before the old Sir Hugh’s death. He was a queer fellow, and had a coothy
+way of getting in about folk, the which was very serviceable to him in
+his vocation; nor was he overly gleg: but when a job was ill done, and he
+was obliged to notice it, he would often break out on the smugglers for
+being so stupid, so that for an exciseman he was wonderful well liked,
+and did not object to a waught of brandy at a time; when the auld wives
+ca’d it well-water. It happened, however, that some unneighbourly person
+sent him notice of a clecking of tea chests, or brandy kegs, at which
+both Jenny and Betty Pawkie were the howdies. Robin could not but
+therefore enter their house; however, before going in, he just cried at
+the door to somebody on the road, so as to let the twa industrious
+lassies hear he was at hand. They were not slack in closing the
+trance-door, and putting stoups and stools behind it, so as to cause
+trouble, and give time before any body could get in. They then emptied
+their chaff-bed, and filled the tikeing with tea, and Betty went in on
+the top, covering herself with the blanket, and graining like a woman in
+labour. It was thought that Robin Bicker himself would not have been
+overly particular in searching the house, considering there was a woman
+seemingly in the death-thraws; but a sorner, an incomer from the east
+country, and that hung about the change-house as a divor hostler, that
+would rather gang a day’s journey in the dark than turn a spade in
+day-light, came to him as he stood at the door, and went in with him to
+see the sport. Robin, for some reason, could not bid him go away, and
+both Betty and Janet were sure he was in the plot against them; indeed,
+it was always thought he was an informer, and no doubt he was something
+not canny, for he had a down look.
+
+It was some time before the doorway was cleared of the stoups and stools,
+and Jenny was in great concern, and flustered, as she said, for her poor
+sister, who was taken with a heart-colic. “I’m sorry for her,” said
+Robin, “but I’ll be as quiet as possible;” and so he searched all the
+house, but found nothing; at the which his companion, the divor east
+country hostler, swore an oath that could not be misunderstood; so,
+without more ado, but as all thought against the grain, Robin went up to
+sympathize with Betty in the bed, whose groans were loud and vehement.
+“Let me feel your pulse,” said Robin, and he looted down as she put forth
+her arm from aneath the clothes, and laying his hand on the bed, cried,
+“Hey! what’s this? this is a costly filling.” Upon which Betty jumpet up
+quite recovered, and Jenny fell to the wailing and railing, while the
+hostler from the east country took the bed of tea on his back, to carry
+it to the change-house, till a cart was gotten to take it into the
+custom-house at Irville.
+
+Betty Pawkie being thus suddenly cured, and grudging the loss of
+property, took a knife in her hand, and as the divor was crossing the
+burn at the stepping-stones that lead to the back of the change-house,
+she ran after him and ripped up the tikeing, and sent all the tea
+floating away on the burn, which was thought a brave action of Betty, and
+the story not a little helped to lighten our melancholy meditations.
+
+Robin Bicker was soon after this affair removed to another district, and
+we got in his place one Mungo Argyle, who was as proud as a provost,
+being come of Highland parentage. Black was the hour he came among my
+people; for he was needy and greedy, and rode on the top of his
+commission. Of all the manifold ills in the train of smuggling, surely
+the excisemen are the worst, and the setting of this rabiator over us was
+a severe judgment for our sins. But he suffered for’t, and peace be with
+him in the grave, where the wicked cease from troubling!
+
+Willie Malcolm, the youngest son of his mother, had by this time learned
+all that Mr. Lorimore, the schoolmaster, could teach; and as it was
+evidenced to every body, by his mild manners and saintliness of
+demeanour, that he was a chosen vessel, his mother longed to fulfil his
+own wish, which was doubtless the natural working of the act of grace
+that had been shed upon him; but she had not the wherewithal to send him
+to the college of Glasgow, where he was desirous to study, and her just
+pride would not allow her to cess his brother-in-law, the Captain
+Macadam, whom, I should now mention, was raised in the end of this year,
+as we read in the newspapers, to be a major. I thought her in this
+somewhat unreasonable, for she would not be persuaded to let me write to
+the captain; but when I reflected on the good that Willie Malcolm might
+in time do as a preacher, I said nothing more to her, but indited a
+letter to the Lord Eaglesham, setting forth the lad’s parts, telling who
+he was and all about his mother’s scruples; and, by the retour of the
+post from London his lordship sent me an order on his steward, to pay me
+twenty pounds towards equipping my protegée, as he called Willie, with a
+promise to pay for his education, which was such a great thing for his
+lordship to do off-hand on my recommendation, that it won much affection
+throughout the country side; and folks began to wonder, rehearsing the
+great things, as was said, that I had gotten my lord at different times,
+and on divers occasions, to do, which had a vast of influence among my
+brethren of the presbytery, and they grew into a state of greater
+cordiality with me, looking on me as a man having authority; but I was
+none thereat lifted up, for not being gifted with the power of a
+kirk-filling eloquence, I was but little sought for at sacraments, and
+fasts, and solemn days, which was doubtless well ordained; for I had no
+motive to seek fame in foreign pulpits, but was left to walk in the paths
+of simplicity within my own parish. To eschew evil myself, and to teach
+others to do the same, I thought the main duties of the pastoral office,
+and with a sincere heart endeavoured what in me lay to perform them with
+meekness, sobriety, and a spirit wakeful to the inroads of sin and Satan.
+But oh, the sordiness of human nature!—The kindness of the Lord
+Eaglesham’s own disposition was ascribed to my influence, and many a dry
+answer I was obliged to give to applicants that would have me trouble his
+lordship, as if I had a claim upon him. In the ensuing year, the notion
+of my cordiality with him came to a great head, and brought about an
+event, that could not have been forethought by me as a thing within the
+compass of possibility to bring to pass.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XX
+YEAR 1779
+
+
+I WAS named in this year for the General Assembly, and Mrs. Balwhidder,
+by her continual thrift, having made our purse able to stand a shake
+against the wind, we resolved to go into Edinburgh in a creditable
+manner. Accordingly, in conjunct with Mrs. Dalrymple, the lady of a
+major of that name, we hired the Irville chaise, and we put up in
+Glasgow, at the Black Boy, where we stayed all night. Next morning, by
+seven o’clock, we got into a fly-coach for the capital of Scotland, which
+we reached after a heavy journey about the same hour in the evening, and
+put up at the public where it stopped till the next day; for really both
+me and Mrs. Balwhidder were worn out with the undertaking, and found a
+cup of tea a vast refreshment.
+
+Betimes, in the morning, having taken our breakfast, we got a caddy to
+guide us and our wallise to Widow M‘Vicar’s, at the head of the
+Covenanters’ Close. She was a relation to my first wife, Betty Lanshaw,
+my own full cousin that was, and we had advised her, by course of post,
+of our coming, and intendment to lodge with her as uncos and strangers.
+But Mrs. M‘Vicar kept a cloth shop, and sold plaidings and flannels,
+besides Yorkshire superfines, and was used to the sudden incoming of
+strangers, especially visitants, both from the West and the North
+Highlands, and was withal a gawsy furthy woman, taking great pleasure in
+hospitality, and every sort of kindliness and discretion. She would not
+allow of such a thing as our being lodgers in her house, but was so cagey
+to see us, and to have it in her power to be civil to a minister, as she
+was pleased to say, of such repute, that nothing less would content her
+but that we must live upon her, and partake of all the best that could be
+gotten for us within the walls of “the gude town.”
+
+When we found ourselves so comfortable, Mrs. Balwhidder and me waited on
+my patron’s family that was, the young ladies, and the laird, who had
+been my pupil, but was now an advocate high in the law. They likewise
+were kind also. In short, every body in Edinburgh were in a manner
+wearisome kind, and we could scarcely find time to see the Castle and the
+palace of Holyrood-house, and that more sanctified place, where the
+Maccabeus of the Kirk of Scotland, John Knox, was wont to live.
+
+Upon my introduction to his grace the Commissioner, I was delighted and
+surprised to find the Lord Eaglesham at the levee, and his lordship was
+so glad on seeing me, that he made me more kenspeckle than I could have
+wished to have been in his grace’s presence; for, owing to the same, I
+was required to preach before his grace, upon a jocose recommendation of
+his lordship; the which gave me great concern, and daunted me so that in
+the interim I was almost bereft of all peace and studious composure of
+mind. Fain would I have eschewed the honour that was thus thrust upon
+me; but both my wife and Mrs. M‘Vicar were just lifted out of themselves
+with the thought.
+
+When the day came, I thought all things in this world were loosened from
+their hold, and that the sure and steadfast earth itself was grown coggly
+beneath my feet, as I mounted the pulpit. With what sincerity I prayed
+for help that day! and never stood man more in need of it; for through
+all my prayer the congregation was so watchful and still, doubtless to
+note if my doctrine was orthodox, that the beating of my heart might have
+been heard to the uttermost corners of the kirk.
+
+I had chosen as my text, from Second Samuel, xixth chapter and 35th
+verse, these words—“Can I hear any more the voice of singing men and
+singing women? Wherefore, then, should thy servant be yet a burden to
+the king?” And hardly had I with a trembling voice read the words, when
+I perceived an awful stir in the congregation; for all applied the words
+to the state of the church, and the appointment of his grace the
+Commissioner. Having paused after giving out the text, the same fearful
+and critical silence again ensued, and every eye was so fixed upon me,
+that I was for a time deprived of courage to look about; but heaven was
+pleased to compassionate my infirmity, and as I proceeded, I began to
+warm as in my own pulpit. I described the gorgeous Babylonian harlot
+riding forth in her chariots of gold and silver, with trampling steeds
+and a hurricane of followers, drunk with the cup of abominations, all
+shouting with revelry, and glorying in her triumph, treading down in
+their career those precious pearls, the saints and martyrs, into the mire
+beneath their swinish feet. “Before her you may behold Wantonness
+playing the tinkling cymbal, Insolence beating the drum, and Pride
+blowing the trumpet. Every vice is there with his emblems; and the
+seller of pardons, with his crucifix and triple crown, is distributing
+his largess of perdition. The voices of men shout to set wide the gates,
+to give entrance to the queen of nations, and the gates are set wide, and
+they all enter. The avenging gates close on them—they are all shut up in
+hell.”
+
+There was a sough in the kirk as I said these words; for the vision I
+described seemed to be passing before me as I spoke, and I felt as if I
+had witnessed the everlasting destruction of Antichrist, and the
+worshippers of the Beast. But soon recovering myself, I said in a soft
+and gentle manner, “Look at yon lovely creature in virgin-raiment, with
+the Bible in her hand. See how mildly she walks along, giving alms to
+the poor as she passes on towards the door of that lowly dwelling—Let us
+follow her in—She takes her seat in the chair at the bedside of the poor
+old dying sinner; and as he tosses in the height of penitence and
+despair, she reads to him the promise of the Saviour—‘This night thou
+shalt be with me in Paradise;’ and he embraces her with transports, and,
+falling back on his pillow, calmly closes his eyes in peace. She is the
+true religion; and when I see what she can do even in the last moments of
+the guilty, well may we exclaim, when we think of the symbols and
+pageantry of the departed superstition, Can I hear any more the voice of
+singing men and singing women? No; let us cling to the simplicity of the
+Truth that is now established in our native land.”
+
+At the conclusion of this clause of my discourse, the congregation, which
+had been all so still and so solemn, never coughing, as was often the
+case among my people, gave a great rustle, changing their positions, by
+which I was almost overcome; however, I took heart and ventured on, and
+pointed out that, with our Bible and an orthodox priesthood, we stood in
+no need of the king’s authority, however bound we were, in temporal
+things, to respect it; and I showed this at some length, crying out in
+the words of my text, “Wherefore, then, should thy servant be yet a
+burden to the king?” in the saying of which I happened to turn my eyes
+towards his grace the Commissioner, as he sat on the throne, and I
+thought his countenance was troubled, which made me add, that he might
+not think I meant him any offence, “That the King of the Church was one
+before whom the great, and the wise, and the good—all doomed and
+sentenced convicts—implore his mercy.” “It is true,” said I, “that in
+the days of his tribulation he was wounded for our iniquities, and died
+to save us; but, at his death, his greatness was proclaimed by the quick
+and the dead. There was sorrow, and there was wonder, and there was
+rage, and there was remorse; but there was no shame there—none blushed on
+that day at that sight but yon glorious luminary.” The congregation
+rose, and looked round, as the sun that I pointed at shone in at the
+window. I was disconcerted by their movement, and my spirit was spent,
+so that I could say no more.
+
+When I came down from the pulpit, there was a great pressing in of
+acquaintance and ministers, who lauded me exceedingly; but I thought it
+could be only in derision, therefore I slipped home to Mrs. M‘Vicar’s as
+fast as I could.
+
+Mrs. M‘Vicar, who was a clever, hearing-all sort of a neighbour, said my
+sermon was greatly thought of, and that I had surprised everybody; but I
+was fearful there was something of jocularity at the bottom of this, for
+she was a flaunty woman, and liked well to give a good-humoured gibe or
+jeer. However, his grace the Commissioner was very thankful for the
+discourse, and complimented me on what he called my apostolical
+earnestness; but he was a courteous man, and I could not trust to him,
+especially as my lord Eaglesham had told me in secrecy before—it’s true,
+it was in his gallanting way—that, in speaking of the king’s servant as I
+had done, I had rather gone beyond the bounds of modern moderation.
+Altogether, I found neither pleasure nor profit in what was thought so
+great an honour, but longed for the privacy of my own narrow pasture, and
+little flock.
+
+It was in this visit to Edinburgh that Mrs. Balwhidder bought her silver
+teapot, and other ornamental articles; but this was not done, as she
+assured me, in a vain spirit of bravery, which I could not have abided,
+but because it was well known that tea draws better in a silver pot, and
+drinks pleasanter in a china cup, than out of any other kind of cup or
+teapot.
+
+By the time I got home to the manse, I had been three whole weeks and
+five days absent, which was more than all my absences together, from the
+time of my placing; and my people were glowing with satisfaction when
+they saw us driving in a Glasgow chaise through the clachan to the manse.
+
+The rest of the year was merely a quiet succession of small incidents,
+none of which are worthy of notation, though they were all severally, no
+doubt, of aught somewhere, as they took us both time and place in the
+coming to pass, and nothing comes to pass without helping onwards to some
+great end; each particular little thing that happens in the world being a
+seed sown by the hand of Providence to yield an increase, which increase
+is destined, in its turn, to minister to some higher purpose, until at
+last the issue affects the whole earth. There is nothing in all the
+world that doth not advance the cause of goodness; no, not even the sins
+of the wicked, though, through the dim casement of her mortal tabernacle,
+the soul of man cannot discern the method thereof.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXI
+YEAR 1780
+
+
+THIS was, among ourselves, another year of few events. A sound, it is
+true, came among us of a design, on the part of the government in London,
+to bring back the old harlotry of papistry; but we spent our time in the
+lea of the hedge, and the lown of the hill. Some there were that a panic
+seized upon when they heard of Lord George Gordon, that zealous
+Protestant, being committed to the Tower; but for my part, I had no
+terror upon me, for I saw all things around me going forward improving;
+and I said to myself, it is not so when Providence permits scathe and
+sorrow to fall upon a nation. Civil troubles, and the casting down of
+thrones, is always forewarned by want and poverty striking the people.
+What I have, therefore, chiefly to record as the memorables of this year,
+are things of small import—the main of which are, that some of the
+neighbouring lairds, taking example by Mr. Kibbock, my father-in-law that
+was, began in this fall to plant the tops of their hills with mounts of
+fir-trees; and Mungo Argyle, the exciseman, just herried the poor
+smugglers to death, and made a power of prize-money, which, however, had
+not the wonted effect of riches, for it brought him no honour; and he
+lived in the parish like a leper, or any other kind of excommunicated
+person.
+
+But I should not forget a most droll thing that took place with Jenny
+Gaffaw, and her daughter. They had been missed from the parish for some
+days, and folk began to be uneasy about what could have become of the two
+silly creatures; till one night, at the dead hour, a strange light was
+seen beaming and burning at the window of the bit hole where they lived.
+It was first observed by Lady Macadam, who never went to bed at any
+Christian hour, but sat up reading her new French novels and play-books
+with Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress. She gave the alarm, thinking that
+such a great and continuous light from a lone house, where never candle
+had been seen before, could be nothing less than the flame of a burning.
+And sending Miss Sabrina and the servants to see what was the matter,
+they beheld daft Jenny, and her as daft daughter, with a score of candle
+doups, (Heaven only knows where they got them!) placed in the window, and
+the twa fools dancing, and linking, and admiring before the door.
+“What’s all this about, Jenny,” said Miss Sabrina.—“Awa’ wi’ you, awa’
+wi’ you—ye wicked pope, ye whore of Babylon—is na it for the glory of
+God, and the Protestant religion? d’ye think I will be a pope as long as
+light can put out darkness?”—And with that the mother and daughter began
+again to leap and dance as madly as before.
+
+It seems that poor Jenny, having heard of the luminations that were
+lighted up through the country on the ending of the Popish Bill, had,
+with Meg, travelled by themselves into Glasgow, where they had gathered
+or begged a stock of candles, and coming back under the cloud of night,
+had surprised and alarmed the whole clachan, by lighting up their window
+in the manner that I have described. Poor Miss Sabrina, at Jenny’s
+uncivil salutation, went back to my lady with her heart full, and would
+fain have had the idiots brought to task before the session, for what
+they had said to her. But I would not hear tell of such a thing, for
+which Miss Sabrina owed me a grudge that was not soon given up. At the
+same time, I was grieved to see the testimonies of joyfulness for a holy
+victory, brought into such disrepute by the ill-timed demonstrations of
+the two irreclaimable naturals, that had not a true conception of the
+cause for which they were triumphing.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXII
+YEAR 1781
+
+
+IF the two last years passed o’er the heads of me and my people without
+any manifest dolour, which is a great thing to say for so long a period
+in this world, we had our own trials and tribulations in the one of which
+I have now to make mention. Mungo Argyle, the exciseman, waxing rich,
+grew proud and petulant, and would have ruled the country side with a rod
+of iron. Nothing less would serve him than a fine horse to ride on, and
+a world of other conveniences and luxuries, as if he had been on an
+equality with gentlemen. And he bought a grand gun, which was called a
+fowling-piece; and he had two pointer dogs, the like of which had not
+been seen in the parish since the planting of the Eaglesham-wood on the
+moorland, which was four years before I got the call. Every body said
+the man was fey; and truly, when I remarked him so gallant and gay on the
+Sabbath at the kirk, and noted his glowing face and gleg een, I thought
+at times there was something no canny about him. It was indeed clear to
+be seen, that the man was hurried out of himself; but nobody could have
+thought that the death he was to dree would have been what it was.
+
+About the end of summer my Lord Eaglesham came to the castle, bringing
+with him an English madam, that was his Miss. Some days after he came
+down from London, as he was riding past the manse, his lordship stopped
+to enquire for my health, and I went to the door to speak to him. I
+thought that he did not meet me with that blithe countenance he was wont,
+and in going away, he said with a blush, “I fear I dare not ask you to
+come to the castle.” I had heard of his concubine, and I said, “In
+saying so, my lord, you show a spark of grace; for it would not become me
+to see what I have heard; and I am surprised, my lord, you will not
+rather take a lady of your own.” He looked kindly, but confused, saying,
+he did not know where to get one; so seeing his shame, and not wishing to
+put him out of conceit entirely with himself, I replied, “Na, na, my
+lord, there’s nobody will believe that, for there never was a silly Jock,
+but there was as silly a Jenny,” at which he laughed heartily, and rode
+away. But I know not what was in’t; I was troubled in mind about him,
+and thought, as he was riding away, that I would never see him again; and
+sure enough it so happened; for the next day, being airing in his coach
+with Miss Spangle, the lady he had brought, he happened to see Mungo
+Argyle with his dogs and his gun, and my lord being as particular about
+his game as the other was about boxes of tea and kegs of brandy, he
+jumped out of the carriage, and ran to take the gun. Words passed, and
+the exciseman shot my lord. Never shall I forget that day; such riding,
+such running, the whole country side afoot; but the same night my lord
+breathed his last; and the mad and wild reprobate that did the deed was
+taken up and sent off to Edinburgh. This was a woeful riddance of that
+oppressor, for my lord was a good landlord and a kind-hearted man; and
+albeit, though a little thoughtless, was aye ready to make his power,
+when the way was pointed out, minister to good works. The whole parish
+mourned for him, and there was not a sorer heart in all its bounds than
+my own. Never was such a sight seen as his burial: the whole country
+side was there, and all as solemn as if they had been assembled in the
+valley of Jehoshaphat in the latter day. The hedges where the funeral
+was to pass were clad with weans, like bunches of hips and haws, and the
+kirkyard was as if all its own dead were risen. Never, do I think, was
+such a multitude gathered together. Some thought there could not be less
+than three thousand grown men, besides women and children.
+
+Scarcely was this great public calamity past, for it could be reckoned no
+less, when one Saturday afternoon, as Miss Sabrina, the schoolmistress,
+was dining with Lady Macadam, her ladyship was stricken with the
+paralytics, and her face so thrown in the course of a few minutes, that
+Miss Sabrina came flying to the manse for the help and advice of Mrs.
+Balwhidder. A doctor was gotten with all speed by express; but her
+ladyship was smitten beyond the reach of medicine. She lived, however,
+some time after; but oh! she was such an object, that it was a grief to
+see her. She could only mutter when she tried to speak, and was as
+helpless as a baby. Though she never liked me, nor could I say there was
+many things in her demeanour that pleased me; yet she was a free-handed
+woman to the needful, and when she died she was more missed than it was
+thought she could have been.
+
+Shortly after her funeral, which was managed by a gentleman sent from her
+friends in Edinburgh, that I wrote to about her condition, the Major, her
+son, with his lady, Kate Malcolm, and two pretty bairns, came and stayed
+in her house for a time, and they were a great happiness to us all, both
+in the way of drinking tea, and sometimes taking a bit of dinner, their
+only mother now, the worthy and pious Mrs. Malcolm, being regularly of
+the company.
+
+Before the end of the year, I should mention, that the fortune of Mrs.
+Malcolm’s family got another shove upwards, by the promotion of her
+second son, Robert Malcolm, who, being grown an expert and careful
+mariner, was made captain of a grand ship, whereof Provost Maitland of
+Glasgow, that was kind to his mother in her distresses, was the owner.
+But that douce lad Willie, her youngest son, who was at the university of
+Glasgow under the Lord Eaglesham’s patronage, was like to have suffered a
+blight. However, Major Macadam, when I spoke to him anent the young
+man’s loss of his patron, said, with a pleasant generosity, he should not
+be stickit; and, accordingly, he made up, as far as money could, for the
+loss of his lordship; but there was none that made up for the great power
+and influence, which, I have no doubt, the Earl would have exerted in his
+behalf, when he was ripened for the church. So that, although in time
+William came out a sound and heart-searching preacher, he was long
+obliged, like many another unfriended saint, to cultivate sand, and wash
+Ethiopians in the shape of an east country gentleman’s camstrairy weans;
+than which, as he wrote me himself, there cannot be on earth a greater
+trial of temper. However, in the end he was rewarded, and is not only
+now a placed minister, but a doctor of divinity.
+
+The death of Lady Macadam was followed by another parochial misfortune;
+for, considering the time when it happened, we could count it as nothing
+less. Auld Thomas Howkings, the betheral, fell sick, and died in the
+course of a week’s illness, about the end of November; and the measles
+coming at that time upon the parish, there was such a smashery of the
+poor weans as had not been known for an age; insomuch that James Banes,
+the lad who was Thomas Howkings’ helper, rose in open rebellion against
+the session during his superior’s illness; and we were constrained to
+augment his pay, and to promise him the place if Thomas did not recover,
+which it was then thought he could not do. On the day this happened,
+there were three dead children in the clachan, and a panic and
+consternation spread about the burial of them when James Bane’s
+insurrection was known, which made both me and the session glad to hush
+up the affair, that the heart of the public might have no more than the
+sufferings of individuals to hurt it.—Thus ended a year, on many
+accounts, heavy to be remembered.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIII
+YEAR 1782
+
+
+ALTHOUGH I have not been particular in noticing it, from time to time,
+there had been an occasional going off, at fairs and on market-days, of
+the lads of the parish as soldiers, and when Captain Malcolm got the
+command of his ship, no less than four young men sailed with him from the
+clachan; so that we were deeper and deeper interested in the proceedings
+of the doleful war that was raging in the plantations. By one post we
+heard of no less than three brave fellows belonging to us being slain in
+one battle, for which there was a loud and general lamentation.
+
+Shortly after this, I got a letter from Charles Malcolm, a very pretty
+letter it indeed was: he had heard of my Lord Eaglesham’s murder, and
+grieved for the loss, both because his lordship was a good man, and
+because he had been such a friend to him and his family. “But,” said
+Charles, “the best way I can show my gratitude for his patronage, is to
+prove myself a good officer to my king and country.” Which I thought a
+brave sentiment, and was pleased thereat; for somehow Charles, from the
+time he brought me the limes to make a bowl of punch, in his pocket from
+Jamaica, had built a nest of affection in my heart. But, oh! the wicked
+wastry of life in war. In less than a month after, the news came of a
+victory over the French fleet, and by the same post I got a letter from
+Mr. Howard, that was the midshipman who came to see us with Charles,
+telling me that poor Charles had been mortally wounded in the action, and
+had afterwards died of his wounds. “He was a hero in the engagement,”
+said Mr. Howard, “and he died as a good and a brave man should.”—These
+tidings gave me one of the sorest hearts I ever suffered, and it was long
+before I could gather fortitude to disclose the tidings to poor Charles’s
+mother. But the callants of the school had heard of the victory, and
+were going shouting about, and had set the steeple bell a-ringing, by
+which Mrs. Malcolm heard the news; and knowing that Charles’s ship was
+with the fleet, she came over to the manse in great anxiety to hear the
+particulars, somebody telling her that there had been a foreign letter to
+me by the postman.
+
+When I saw her I could not speak, but looked at her in pity, and, the
+tear fleeing up into my eyes, she guessed what had happened. After
+giving a deep and sore sigh, she enquired, “How did he behave? I hope
+well, for he was aye a gallant laddie!”—and then she wept very bitterly.
+However, growing calmer, I read to her the letter; and, when I had done,
+she begged me to give it to her to keep, saying, “It’s all that I have
+now left of my pretty boy; but it’s mair precious to me than the wealth
+of the Indies;” and she begged me to return thanks to the Lord for all
+the comforts and manifold mercies with which her lot had been blessed,
+since the hour she put her trust in him alone; and that was when she was
+left a penniless widow, with her five fatherless bairns.
+
+It was just an edification of the spirit to see the Christian resignation
+of this worthy woman. Mrs. Balwhidder was confounded, and said, there
+was more sorrow in seeing the deep grief of her fortitude than tongue
+could tell.
+
+ [Picture: The Old Herd]
+
+Having taken a glass of wine with her, I walked out to conduct her to her
+own house; but in the way we met with a severe trial. All the weans were
+out parading with napkins and kail-blades on sticks, rejoicing and
+triumphing in the glad tidings of victory. But when they saw me and Mrs.
+Malcolm coming slowly along, they guessed what had happened, and threw
+away their banners of joy; and standing all up in a row, with silence and
+sadness, along the kirkyard wall as we passed, showed an instinct of
+compassion that penetrated to my very soul. The poor mother burst into
+fresh affliction, and some of the bairns into an audible weeping; and,
+taking one another by the hand, they followed us to her door, like
+mourners at a funeral. Never was such a sight seen in any town before.
+The neighbours came to look at it as we walked along, and the men turned
+aside to hide their faces; while the mothers pressed their babies
+fondlier to their bosoms, and watered their innocent faces with their
+tears.
+
+I prepared a suitable sermon, taking as the words of my text, “Howl, ye
+ships of Tarshish, for your strength is laid waste.” But when I saw
+around me so many of my people clad in complimentary mourning for the
+gallant Charles Malcolm, and that even poor daft Jenny Gaffaw, and her
+daughter, had on an old black riband; and when I thought of him, the
+spirited laddie, coming home from Jamaica with his parrot on his
+shoulder, and his limes for me, my heart filled full, and I was obliged
+to sit down in the pulpit, and drop a tear.
+
+After a pause, and the Lord having vouchsafed to compose me, I rose up,
+and gave out that anthem of triumph, the 124th psalm, the singing of
+which brought the congregation round to themselves; but still I felt that
+I could not preach as I had meant to do; therefore I only said a few
+words of prayer, and singing another psalm, dismissed the congregation.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIV
+YEAR 1783
+
+
+THIS was another Sabbath year of my ministry. It has left me nothing to
+record but a silent increase of prosperity in the parish. I myself had
+now in the bank more than a thousand pounds, and every thing was thriving
+around. My two bairns, Gilbert, that is now the merchant in Glasgow, was
+grown into a sturdy ramplor laddie, and Janet, that is married upon Dr.
+Kittleword, the minister of Swappington, was as fine a lassie for her
+years as the eyes of a parent could desire to see.
+
+Shortly after the news of the peace, an event at which all gave
+themselves up to joy, a thing happened among us that at the time caused
+much talk; but although very dreadful, was yet not so serious, some how
+or other, as such an awsome doing should have been. Poor Jenny Gaffaw
+happened to take a heavy cold, and soon thereafter died. Meg went about
+from house to house, begging dead-clothes, and got the body straighted in
+a wonderful decent manner, with a plate of earth and salt placed upon
+it—an admonitory type of mortality and eternal life that has
+ill-advisedly gone out of fashion. When I heard of this, I could not but
+go to see how a creature that was not thought possessed of a grain of
+understanding, could have done so much herself. On entering the door, I
+beheld Meg sitting with two or three of the neighbouring kimmers, and the
+corpse laid out on a bed. “Come awa’, sir,” said Meg; “this is an
+altered house. They’re gane that keepit it bein; but, sir, we maun a’
+come to this—we maun pay the debt o’ nature—death is a grim creditor, and
+a doctor but brittle bail when the hour of reckoning’s at han’! What a
+pity it is, mother, that you’re now dead, for here’s the minister come to
+see you. Oh, sir! but she would have had a proud heart to see you in her
+dwelling, for she had a genteel turn, and would not let me, her only
+daughter, mess or mell wi’ the lathron lasses of the clachan. Ay, ay,
+she brought me up with care, and edicated me for a lady: nae coarse wark
+darkened my lily-white hands. But I maun work now; I maun dree the
+penalty of man.”
+
+Having stopped some time, listening to the curious maunnering of Meg, I
+rose to come away; but she laid her hand on my arm, saying, “No, sir, ye
+maun taste before ye gang! My mother had aye plenty in her life, nor
+shall her latter day be needy.”
+
+Accordingly, Meg, with all the due formality common on such occasions,
+produced a bottle of water, and a dram-glass, which she filled and
+tasted, then presented to me, at the same time offering me a bit of bread
+on a slate. It was a consternation to everybody how the daft creature
+had learnt all the ceremonies, which she performed in a manner past the
+power of pen to describe, making the solemnity of death, by her strange
+mockery, a kind of merriment, that was more painful than sorrow; but some
+spirits are gifted with a faculty of observation, that, by the strength
+of a little fancy, enables them to make a wonderful and truthlike
+semblance of things and events, which they never saw, and poor Meg seemed
+to have this gift.
+
+The same night, the session having provided a coffin, the body was put
+in, and removed to Mr. Mutchkin’s brewhouse, where the lads and lassies
+kept the late-wake.
+
+Saving this, the year flowed in a calm, and we floated on in the stream
+of time towards the great ocean of eternity, like ducks and geese in the
+river’s tide, that are carried down without being sensible of the speed
+of the current. Alas! we have not wings like them, to fly back to the
+place we set out from.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXV
+YEAR 1784
+
+
+I HAVE ever thought that this was a bright year, truly an Ann. Dom., for
+in it many of the lads came home that had listed to be soldiers; and Mr.
+Howard, that was the midshipman, being now a captain of a man-of-war,
+came down from England and married Effie Malcolm, and took her up with
+him to London, where she wrote to her mother, that she found his family
+people of great note, and more kind to her than she could write. By this
+time, also, Major Macadam was made a colonel, and lived with his lady in
+Edinburgh, where they were much respected by the genteeler classes, Mrs.
+Macadam being considered a great unco among them for all manner of
+ladylike ornaments, she having been taught every sort of perfection in
+that way by the old lady, who was educated at the court of France, and
+was, from her birth, a person of quality. In this year, also, Captain
+Malcolm, her brother, married a daughter of a Glasgow merchant, so that
+Mrs. Malcolm, in her declining years, had the prospect of a bright
+setting; but nothing could change the sober Christianity of her settled
+mind; and although she was strongly invited, both by the Macadams and the
+Howards, to see their felicity, she ever declined the same, saying—“No!
+I have been long out of the world, or rather, I have never been in it; my
+ways are not as theirs; and although I ken their hearts would be glad to
+be kind to me, I might fash their servants, or their friends might think
+me unlike other folk, by which, instead of causing pleasure,
+mortification might ensue; so I will remain in my own house, trusting
+that, when they can spare the time, they will come and see me.”
+
+There was a spirit of true wisdom in this resolution, for it required a
+forbearance that in weaker minds would have relaxed; but though a person
+of a most slender and delicate frame of body, she was a Judith in
+fortitude; and in all the fortune that seemed now smiling upon her, she
+never was lifted up, but bore always that pale and meek look, which gave
+a saintliness to her endeavours in the days of her suffering and poverty.
+
+But when we enjoy most, we have least to tell. I look back on this year
+as on a sunny spot in the valley, amidst the shadows of the clouds of
+time; and I have nothing to record, save the remembrance of welcomings
+and weddings, and a meeting of bairns and parents, that the wars and the
+waters had long raged between. Contentment within the bosom, lent a
+livelier grace to the countenance of Nature; and everybody said, that in
+this year the hedges were greener than common, the gowans brighter on the
+brae, and the heads of the statelier trees adorned with a richer coronal
+of leaves and blossoms. All things were animated with the gladness of
+thankfulness, and testified to the goodness of their Maker.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVI
+YEAR 1785
+
+
+WELL may we say, in the pious words of my old friend and neighbour, the
+Reverend Mr. Keekie of Loupinton, that the world is such a
+wheel-carriage, that it might very properly be called the WHIRL’D. This
+reflection was brought home to me in a very striking manner, while I was
+preparing a discourse for my people, to be preached on the anniversary
+day of my placing, in which I took a view of what had passed in the
+parish during the five-and-twenty years that I had been, by the grace of
+God, the pastor thereof. The bairns, that were bairns when I came among
+my people, were ripened unto parents, and a new generation was swelling
+in the bud around me. But it is what happened that I have to give an
+account of.
+
+This year the Lady Macadam’s jointure-house that was, having been long
+without a tenant, a Mr. Cayenne and his family, American loyalists, came
+and took it, and settled among us for a time. His wife was a clever
+woman, and they had two daughters, Miss Virginia and Miss Carolina; but
+he was himself an ettercap, a perfect spunkie of passion, as ever was
+known in town or country. His wife had a terrible time o’t with him, and
+yet the unhappy man had a great share of common sense, and, saving the
+exploits of his unmanageable temper, was an honest and creditable
+gentleman. Of his humour we soon had a sample, as I shall relate at
+length all about it.
+
+Shortly after he came to the parish, Mrs. Balwhidder and me waited upon
+the family to pay our respects, and Mr. Cayenne, in a free and hearty
+manner, insisted on us staying to dinner. His wife, I could see, was not
+satisfied with this, not being, as I discerned afterwards, prepared to
+give an entertainment to strangers; however, we fell into the misfortune
+of staying, and nothing could exceed the happiness of Mr. Cayenne. I
+thought him one of the blithest bodies I had ever seen, and had no notion
+that he was such a tap of tow as in the sequel he proved himself.
+
+As there was something extra to prepare, the dinner was a little longer
+of being on the table than usual, at which he began to fash, and every
+now and then took a turn up and down the room, with his hands behind his
+back, giving a short melancholious whistle. At length the dinner was
+served, but it was more scanty than he had expected, and this upset his
+good-humour altogether. Scarcely had I asked the blessing when he began
+to storm at his blackamoor servant, who was, however, used to his way,
+and did his work without minding him; but by some neglect there was no
+mustard down, which Mr. Cayenne called for in the voice of a tempest, and
+one of the servant lassies came in with the pot, trembling. It happened
+that, as it had not been used for a day or two before, the lid was
+clagged, and, as it were, glued in, so that Mr. Cayenne could not get it
+out, which put him quite wud, and he attempted to fling it at Sambo, the
+black lad’s head, but it stottit against the wall, and the lid flying
+open, the whole mustard flew in his own face, which made him a sight not
+to be spoken of. However it calmed him; but really, as I had never seen
+such a man before, I could not but consider the accident as a
+providential reproof, and trembled to think what greater evil might fall
+out in the hands of a man so left to himself in the intemperance of
+passion.
+
+But the worst thing about Mr. Cayenne was his meddling with matters in
+which he had no concern; for he had a most irksome nature, and could not
+be at rest, so that he was truly a thorn in our side. Among other of his
+strange doings, was the part he took in the proceedings of the session,
+with which he had as little to do, in a manner, as the man in the moon;
+but having no business on his hands, he attended every sederunt, and from
+less to more, having no self-government, he began to give his opinion in
+our deliberations; and often bred us trouble, by causing strife to arise.
+
+It happened, as the time of the summer occasion was drawing near, that it
+behoved us to make arrangements about the assistance; and upon the
+suggestion of the elders, to which I paid always the greatest deference,
+I invited Mr. Keekie of Loupinton, who was a sound preacher, and a great
+expounder of the kittle parts of the Old Testament, being a man well
+versed in the Hebrew and etymologies, for which he was much reverenced by
+the old people that delighted to search the Scriptures. I had also
+written to Mr. Sprose of Annock, a preacher of another sort, being a
+vehement and powerful thresher of the word, making the chaff and vain
+babbling of corrupt commentators to fly from his hand. He was not,
+however, so well liked, as he wanted that connect method which is needful
+to the enforcing of doctrine. But he had never been among us, and it was
+thought it would be a godly treat to the parish to let the people hear
+him. Besides Mr. Sprose, Mr. Waikle of Gowanry, a quiet hewer out of the
+image of holiness in the heart, was likewise invited, all in addition to
+our old stoops from the adjacent parishes.
+
+None of these three preachers were in any estimation with Mr. Cayenne,
+who had only heard each of them once; and he, happening to be present in
+the session-house at the time, enquired how we had settled. I thought
+this not a very orderly question, but I gave him a civil answer, saying,
+that, Mr. Keekie of Loupinton would preach on the morning of the
+fast-day, Mr. Sprose of Annock in the afternoon, and Mr. Waikle of
+Gowanry on the Saturday. Never shall I or the elders, while the breath
+of life is in our bodies, forget the reply. Mr. Cayenne struck the table
+like a clap of thunder, and cried, “Mr. Keekie of Loupinton, and Mr.
+Sprose of Annock, and Mr. Waikle of Gowanry, and all suck trash, may go
+to — and be —!” and out of the house he bounced, like a hand-ball
+stotting on a stone.
+
+The elders and me were confounded, and for some time we could not speak,
+but looked at each other, doubtful if our ears heard aright. At long and
+length I came to myself; and, in the strength of God, took my place at
+the table, and said, this was an outrageous impiety not to be borne,
+which all the elders agreed to; and we thereupon came to a resolve, which
+I dictated myself, wherein we debarred Mr. Cayenne from ever after
+entering, unless summoned, the session-house, the which resolve we
+directed the session-clerk to send to him direct, and thus we vindicated
+the insulted privileges of the church.
+
+Mr. Cayenne had cooled before he got home, and our paper coming to him in
+his appeased blood, he immediately came to the manse, and made a contrite
+apology for his hasty temper, which I reported in due time and form, to
+the session, and there the matter ended. But here was an example plain
+to be seen of the truth of the old proverb, that as one door shuts
+another opens; for scarcely were we in quietness by the decease of that
+old light-headed woman, the Lady Macadam, till a full equivalent for her
+was given in this hot and fiery Mr. Cayenne.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVII
+YEAR 1786
+
+
+FROM the day of my settlement, I had resolved, in order to win the
+affections of my people, and to promote unison among the heritors, to be
+of as little expense to the parish as possible; but by this time the
+manse had fallen into a sore state of decay—the doors were wormed on the
+hinges—the casements of the windows chattered all the winter, like the
+teeth of a person perishing with cold, so that we had no comfort in the
+house; by which, at the urgent instigations of Mrs. Balwhidder, I was
+obligated to represent our situation to the session. I would rather,
+having so much saved money in the bank, paid the needful repairs myself,
+than have done this, but she said it would be a rank injustice to our own
+family; and her father, Mr. Kibbock, who was very long-headed, with more
+than a common man’s portion of understanding, pointed out to me, that, as
+my life was but in my lip, it would be a wrong thing towards whomsoever
+was ordained to be my successor, to use the heritors to the custom of the
+minister paying for the reparations of the manse, as it might happen he
+might not be so well able to afford it as me. So in a manner, by their
+persuasion, and the constraint of the justice of the case, I made a
+report of the infirmities both of doors and windows, as well as of the
+rotten state of the floors, which were constantly in want of cobbling.
+Over and above all, I told them of the sarking of the roof, which was as
+frush as a puddock-stool; insomuch, that in every blast some of the pins
+lost their grip, and the slates came hurling off.
+
+The heritors were accordingly convened, and, after some deliberation,
+they proposed that the house should be seen to, and whitewashed and
+painted; and I thought this might do, for I saw they were terrified at
+the expense of a thorough repair; but when I went home and repeated to
+Mrs. Balwhidder what had been said at the meeting, and my thankfulness at
+getting the heritors’ consent to do so much, she was excessively angry,
+and told me, that all the painting and whitewashing in the world would
+avail nothing, for that the house was as a sepulchre full of rottenness;
+and she sent for Mr. Kibbock, her father, to confer with him on the way
+of getting the matter put to rights.
+
+Mr. Kibbock came, and hearing of what had passed, pondered for some time,
+and then said, “All was very right! the minister (meaning me) has just to
+get tradesmen to look at the house, and write out their opinion of what
+it needs. There will be plaster to mend; so, before painting, he will
+get a plasterer. There will be a slater wanted; he has just to get a
+slater’s estimate, and a wright’s, and so forth, and when all is done, he
+will lay them before the session and the heritors, who, no doubt, will
+direct the reparations to go forward.”
+
+ [Picture: The Roadman]
+
+This was very pawkie, counselling, of Mr. Kibbock, and I did not see
+through it at the time, but did as he recommended, and took all the
+different estimates, when they came in, to the session. The elders
+commended my prudence exceedingly for so doing, before going to work; and
+one of them asked me what the amount of the whole would be, but I had not
+cast it up. Some of the heritors thought that a hundred pounds would be
+sufficient for the outlay; but judge of our consternation, when, in
+counting up all the sums of the different estimates together, we found
+them well on towards a thousand pounds. “Better big a new house at once,
+than do this!” cried all the elders, by which I then perceived the
+draughtiness of Mr. Kibbock’s advice. Accordingly, another meeting of
+the heritors was summoned, and after a great deal of controversy, it was
+agreed that a new manse should be erected; and, shortly after, we
+contracted with Thomas Trowel, the mason to build one for six hundred
+pounds, with all the requisite appurtenances, by which a clear gain was
+saved to the parish, by the foresight of Mr. Kibbock, to the amount of
+nearly four hundred pounds. But the heritors did not mean to have
+allowed the sort of repair that his plan comprehended. He was, however,
+a far forecasting man; the like of him for natural parts not being in our
+country side; and nobody could get the whip-hand of him, either in a
+bargain or an improvement, when he once was sensible of the advantage.
+He was, indeed, a blessing to the shire, both by his example as a farmer,
+and by his sound and discreet advice in the contentions of his
+neighbours, being a man, as was a saying among the commonality, “wiser
+than the law and the fifteen Lords of Edinburgh.”
+
+The building of the new manse occasioned a heavy cess on the heritors,
+which made them overly ready to pick holes in the coats of me and the
+elders; so that, out of my forbearance and delicacy in time past, grew a
+lordliness on their part, that was an ill return for the years that I had
+endured no little inconveniency for their sake. It was not in my heart
+or principles to harm the hair of a dog; but when I discerned the
+austerity with which they were disposed to treat their minister, I
+bethought me that, for the preservation of what was due to the
+establishment and the upholding of the decent administration of religion,
+I ought to set my face against the sordid intolerance by which they were
+actuated. This notion I weighed well before divulging it to any person;
+but when I had assured myself as to the rectitude thereof, I rode over
+one day to Mr. Kibbock’s, and broke my mind to him about claiming out of
+the teinds an augmentation of my stipend, not because I needed it, but in
+case, after me, some bare and hungry gorbie of the Lord should be sent
+upon the parish, in no such condition to plea with the heritors as I was.
+Mr. Kibbock highly approved of my intent; and by his help, after much
+tribulation, I got an augmentation both in glebe and income; and to mark
+my reason for what I did, I took upon me to keep and clothe the wives and
+orphans of the parish, who lost their breadwinners in the American war.
+But for all that, the heritors spoke of me as an avaricious Jew, and made
+the hard-won fruits of Mrs. Balwhidder’s great thrift and good management
+a matter of reproach against me. Few of them would come to the church,
+but stayed away, to the detriment of their own souls hereafter, in order,
+as they thought, to punish me; so that, in the course of this year, there
+was a visible decay of the sense of religion among the better orders of
+the parish, and, as will be seen in the sequel, their evil example
+infected the minds of many of the rising generation.
+
+It was in this year that Mr. Cayenne bought the mailing of the Wheatrigs,
+but did not begin to build his house till the following spring; for being
+ill to please with a plan, he fell out with the builders, and on one
+occasion got into such a passion with Mr. Trowel, the mason, that he
+struck him a blow on the face, for which he was obligated to make
+atonement. It was thought the matter would have been carried before the
+Lords; but, by the mediation of Mr. Kibbock, with my helping hand, a
+reconciliation was brought about, Mr. Cayenne indemnifying the mason with
+a sum of money to say no more anent it; after which, he employed him to
+build his house, a thing that no man could have thought possible, who
+reflected on the enmity between them.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVIII
+YEAR 1787
+
+
+THERE had been, as I have frequently observed, a visible improvement
+going on in the parish. From the time of the making of the toll-road,
+every new house that was built in the clachan was built along that road.
+Among other changes hereby caused, the Lady Macadam’s jointure-house that
+was, which stood in a pleasant parterre, inclosed within a stone wall and
+an iron gate, having a pillar with a pineapple head on each side, came to
+be in the middle of the town. While Mr. Cayenne inhabited the same, it
+was maintained in good order; but on his flitting to his own new house on
+the Wheatrigs, the parterre was soon overrun with weeds, and it began to
+wear the look of a waste place. Robert Toddy, who then kept the
+change-house, and who had, from the lady’s death, rented the coach-house
+for stabling, in this juncture thought of it for an inn; so he set his
+own house to Thomas Treddles the weaver, whose son, William, is now the
+great Glasgow manufacturer, that has cotton-mills and steam-engines, and
+took, “the Place,” as it was called, and had a fine sign, THE CROSS-KEYS,
+painted and put up in golden characters, by which it became one of the
+most noted inns anywhere to be seen; and the civility of Mrs. Toddy was
+commended by all strangers. But although this transmutation from a
+change-house to an inn was a vast amendment, in a manner, to the parish,
+there was little amendment of manners thereby; for the farmer lads began
+to hold dancings and other riotous proceedings there, and to bring, as it
+were, the evil practices of towns into the heart of the country. All
+sort of licence was allowed as to drink and hours; and the edifying
+example of Mr. Mutchkins and his pious family, was no longer held up to
+the imitation of the wayfaring man.
+
+Saving the mutation of “the Place” into an inn, nothing very remarkable
+happened in this year. We got into our new manse about the middle of
+March; but it was rather damp, being new plastered, and it caused me to
+have a severe attack of the rheumatics in the fall of the year.
+
+I should not, in my notations, forget to mark a new luxury that got in
+among the commonality at this time. By the opening of new roads, and the
+traffic thereon with carts and carriers, and by our young men that were
+sailors going to the Clyde, and sailing to Jamaica and the West Indies,
+heaps of sugar and coffee-beans were brought home, while many, among the
+kail-stocks and cabbages in their yards, had planted groset and berry
+bushes; which two things happening together, the fashion to make jam and
+jelly, which hitherto had been only known in the kitchens and
+confectionaries of the gentry, came to be introduced into the clachan.
+All this, however, was not without a plausible pretext; for it was found
+that jelly was an excellent medicine for a sore throat, and jam a remedy
+as good as London candy for a cough, or a cold, or a shortness of breath.
+I could not, however, say that this gave me so much concern as the
+smuggling trade, only it occasioned a great fasherie to Mrs. Balwhidder;
+for, in the berry time, there was no end to the borrowing of her
+brass-pan to make jelly and jam, till Mrs. Toddy of the Cross-Keys bought
+one, which, in its turn, came into request, and saved ours.
+
+It was in the Martinmas quarter of this year that I got the first payment
+of my augmentation. Having no desire to rip up old sores, I shall say no
+more anent it, the worst being anticipated in my chronicle of the last
+year; but there was a thing happened in the payment that occasioned a
+vexation at the time, of a very disagreeable nature. Daft Meg Gaffaw,
+who, from the tragical death of her mother, was a privileged subject,
+used to come to the manse on the Saturdays for a meal of meat; and so it
+fell out that as, by some neglect of mine, no steps had been taken to
+regulate the disposal of the victual that constituted the means of the
+augmentation, some of the heritors, in an ungracious temper, sent what
+they called the tithe-ball (the Lord knows it was not the fiftieth!) to
+the manse, where I had no place to put it. This fell out on a Saturday
+night, when I was busy with my sermon, thinking not of silver or gold,
+but of much better; so that I was greatly molested and disturbed thereby.
+Daft Meg, who sat by the kitchen chimley-lug, hearing a’, said nothing
+for a time; but when she saw how Mrs. Balwhidder and me were put to, she
+cried out with a loud voice, like a soul under the inspiration of
+prophecy—“When the widow’s cruse had filled all the vessels in the house,
+the Lord stopped the increase. Verily, verily, I say unto you, if your
+barns be filled, and your girnell-kists can hold no more, seek till ye
+shall find the tume basins of the poor, and therein pour the corn, and
+the oil, and the wine of your abundance; so shall ye be blessed of the
+Lord.” The which words I took for an admonition, and directing the sacks
+to be brought into the dining-room and other chambers of the manse, I
+sent off the heritors’ servants, that had done me this prejudice, with an
+unexpected thankfulness. But this, as I afterwards was informed, both
+them and their masters attributed to the greedy grasp of avarice, with
+which they considered me as misled; and having said so, nothing could
+exceed their mortification on Monday, when they heard (for they were of
+those who had deserted the kirk) that I had given by the precentor notice
+to every widow in the parish that was in need, to come to the manse and
+she would receive her portion of the partitioning of the augmentation.
+Thus, without any offence on my part, saving the strictness of justice,
+was a division made between me and the heritors; but the people were with
+me; and my own conscience was with me; and though the fronts of the lofts
+and the pews of the heritors were but thinly filled, I trusted that a
+good time was coming, when the gentry would see the error of their way.
+So I bent the head of resignation to the Lord, and, assisted by the
+wisdom of Mr. Kibbock, adhered to the course I had adopted; but at the
+close of the year my heart was sorrowful for the schism; and my prayer on
+Hogmanay was one of great bitterness of soul, that such an evil had come
+to pass.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIX
+YEAR 1788
+
+
+IT had been often remarked by ingenious men, that the Brawl burn, which
+ran through the parish, though a small, was yet a rapid stream, and had a
+wonderful capability for damming, and to turn mills. From the time that
+the Irville water deserted its channel this brook grew into repute, and
+several mills and dams had been erected on its course. In this year a
+proposal came from Glasgow to build a cotton-mill on its banks, beneath
+the Witch-linn, which being on a corner of the Wheatrig, the property of
+Mr. Cayenne, he not only consented thereto, but took a part in the profit
+or loss therein; and, being a man of great activity, though we thought
+him, for many a day, a serpent-plague sent upon the parish, he proved
+thereby one of our greatest benefactors. The cotton-mill was built, and
+a spacious fabric it was—nothing like it had been seen before in our day
+and generation—and, for the people that were brought to work in it, a new
+town was built in the vicinity, which Mr. Cayenne, the same being founded
+on his land, called Cayenneville, the name of the plantation in Virginia
+that had been taken from him by the rebellious Americans. From that day
+Fortune was lavish of her favours upon him; his property swelled, and
+grew in the most extraordinary manner, and the whole country side was
+stirring with a new life. For, when the mill was set a-going, he got
+weavers of muslin established in Cayenneville; and shortly after, but
+that did not take place till the year following, he brought women all the
+way from the neighbourhood of Manchester, in England, to teach the lassie
+bairns in our old clachan tambouring.
+
+Some of the ancient families, in their turreted houses, were not pleased
+with this innovation, especially when they saw the handsome dwellings
+that were built for the weavers of the mills, and the unstinted hand that
+supplied the wealth required for the carrying on of the business. It
+sank their pride into insignificance, and many of them would almost
+rather have wanted the rise that took place in the value of their lands,
+than have seen this incoming of what they called o’er-sea speculation.
+But, saving the building of the cotton-mill, and the beginning of
+Cayenneville, nothing more memorable happened in this year, still it was
+nevertheless a year of a great activity. The minds of men were excited
+to new enterprises; a new genius, as it were, had descended upon the
+earth, and there was an erect and outlooking spirit abroad that was not
+to be satisfied with the taciturn regularity of ancient affairs. Even
+Miss Sabrina Hooky, the schoolmistress, though now waned from her
+meridian, was touched with the enlivening rod, and set herself to learn
+and to teach tambouring, in such a manner as to supersede by precept and
+example that old time-honoured functionary, as she herself called it, the
+spinning-wheel, proving, as she did one night to Mr. Kibbock and me,
+that, if more money could be made by a woman tambouring than by spinning,
+it was better for her to tambour than to spin.
+
+But, in the midst of all this commercing and manufacturing, I began to
+discover signs of decay in the wonted simplicity of our country ways.
+Among the cotton-spinners and muslin weavers of Cayenneville were several
+unsatisfied and ambitious spirits, who clubbed together, and got a London
+newspaper to the Cross-Keys, where they were nightly in the habit of
+meeting and debating about the affairs of the French, which were then
+gathering towards a head. They were represented to me as lads by common
+in capacity, but with unsettled notions of religion. They were, however,
+quiet and orderly; and some of them since, at Glasgow, Paisley, and
+Manchester, even, I am told, in London, have grown into a topping way.
+
+It seems they did not like my manner of preaching, and on that account
+absented themselves from public worship; which, when I heard, I sent for
+some of them, to convince them of their error with regard to the truth of
+divers points of doctrine; but they confounded me with their objections,
+and used my arguments, which were the old and orthodox proven opinions of
+the Divinity Hall, as if they had been the light sayings of a vain man.
+So that I was troubled, fearing that some change would ensue to my
+people, who had hitherto lived amidst the boughs and branches of the
+gospel unmolested by the fowler’s snare, and I set myself to watch
+narrowly, and with a vigilant eye, what would come to pass.
+
+There was a visible increase among us of worldly prosperity in the course
+of this year; insomuch that some of the farmers, who were in the custom
+of taking their vendibles to the neighbouring towns on the Tuesdays, the
+Wednesdays, and Fridays, were led to open a market on the Saturdays in
+our own clachan, the which proved a great convenience. But I cannot take
+it upon me to say, whether this can be said to have well begun in the
+present Ann. Dom., although I know that in the summer of the ensuing year
+it was grown into a settled custom; which I well recollect by the
+Macadams coming with their bairns to see Mrs. Malcolm, their mother,
+suddenly on a Saturday afternoon; on which occasion me and Mrs.
+Balwhidder were invited to dine with them, and Mrs. Malcolm bought in the
+market for the dinner that day, both mutton and fowls, such as twenty
+years before could not have been got for love or money on such a pinch.
+Besides, she had two bottles of red and white wine from the Cross-Keys,
+luxuries which, saving in the Breadland House in its best days, could not
+have been had in the whole parish, but must have been brought from a
+borough town; for Eaglesham Castle is not within the bounds of
+Dalmailing, and my observe does not apply to the stock and stores of that
+honourable mansion, but only to the dwellings of our own heritors, who
+were in general straitened in their circumstances, partly with upsetting,
+and partly by the eating rust of family pride, which hurt the edge of
+many a clever fellow among them, that would have done well in the way of
+trade, but sunk into divors for the sake of their genteelity.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXX
+YEAR 1789
+
+
+THIS I have always reflected upon as one of our blessed years. It was
+not remarkable for any extraordinary occurrence; but there was a
+hopefulness in the minds of men, and a planning of new undertakings, of
+which, whatever may be the upshot, the devising is ever rich in the
+cheerful anticipations of good.
+
+Another new line of road was planned, for a shorter cut to the
+cotton-mill, from the main road to Glasgow, and a public-house was opened
+in Cayenneville: the latter, however, was not an event that gave me much
+satisfaction; but it was a convenience to the inhabitants, and the
+carriers that brought the cotton-bags and took away the yarn twice
+a-week, needed a place of refreshment. And there was a stage-coach set
+up thrice every week from Ayr, that passed through the town, by which it
+was possible to travel to Glasgow between breakfast and dinner time, a
+thing that could not, when I came to the parish, have been thought within
+the compass of man.
+
+This stage-coach I thought one of the greatest conveniences that had been
+established among us; and it enabled Mrs. Balwhidder to send a basket of
+her fresh butter into the Glasgow market, by which, in the spring and the
+fall of the year, she got a great price; for the Glasgow merchants are
+fond of excellent eatables, and the payment was aye ready money—Tam
+Whirlit the driver paying for the one basket when he took up the other.
+
+In this year William Malcolm, the youngest son of the widow, having been
+some time a tutor in a family in the east country, came to see his
+mother, as indeed he had done every year from the time he went to the
+college; but this occasion was made remarkable by his preaching in my
+pulpit. His old acquaintance were curious to hear him; and I myself had
+a sort of a wish likewise, being desirous to know how far he was
+orthodox; so I thought fit, on the suggestion of one of the elders, to
+ask him to preach one day for me, which, after some fleeching, he
+consented to do. I think, however, there was a true modesty in his
+diffidence, although his reason was a weak one, being lest he might not
+satisfy his mother, who had as yet never heard him. Accordingly, on the
+Sabbath after, he did preach, and the kirk was well packed, and I was not
+one of the least attentive of the congregation. His sermon assuredly was
+well put together and there was nothing to object to in his doctrine; but
+the elderly people thought his language rather too Englified, which I
+thought likewise; for I never could abide that the plain auld Kirk of
+Scotland, with her sober presbyterian simplicity, should borrow, either
+in word or in deed, from the language of the prelatic hierarchy of
+England. Nevertheless, the younger part of the congregation were loud in
+his praise, saying, there had not been heard before such a style of
+language in our side of the country. As for Mrs. Malcolm, his mother,
+when I spoke to her anent the same, she said but little, expressing only
+her hope that his example would be worthy of his precepts; so that, upon
+the whole, it was a satisfaction to us all, that he was likely to prove a
+stoop and upholding pillar to the Kirk of Scotland. And his mother had
+the satisfaction, before she died, to see him a placed minister, and his
+name among the authors of his country; for he published at Edinburgh a
+volume of Moral Essays, of which he sent me a pretty bound copy, and they
+were greatly creditable to his pen, though lacking somewhat of that birr
+and smeddum that is the juice and flavour of books of that sort.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXI
+YEAR 1790
+
+
+THE features of this Ann. Dom. partook of the character of its
+predecessor. Several new houses were added to the clachan; Cayenneville
+was spreading out with weavers’ shops, and growing up fast into a town.
+In some respects it got the start of ours; for one day, when I was going
+to dine with Mr. Cayenne at Wheatrig House, not a little to my amazement,
+did I behold a bookseller’s shop opened there, with sticks of red and
+black wax, pouncet-boxes, pens, pocket-books, and new publications, in
+the window, such as the like of was only to be seen in cities and borough
+towns. And it was lighted at night by a patent lamp, which shed a
+wonderful beam, burning oil, and having no smoke. The man sold likewise
+perfumery, powder-puffs, trinkets, and Dublin dolls, besides penknives,
+Castile soap, and walking-sticks, together with a prodigy of other
+luxuries too tedious to mention.
+
+Upon conversing with the man, for I was enchanted to go into this
+phenomenon, for as no less could I regard it, he told me that he had a
+correspondence with London, and could get me down any book published
+there within the same month in which it came out; and he showed me divers
+of the newest come out, of which I did not read even in the _Scots
+Magazine_ till more than three months after, although I had till then
+always considered that work as most interesting for its early
+intelligence. But what I was most surprised to hear, was, that he took
+in a daily London newspaper for the spinners and weavers, who paid him a
+penny a-week a-piece for the same; they being all greatly taken up with
+what, at the time, was going on in France.
+
+This bookseller in the end, however, proved a whawp in our nest, for he
+was in league with some of the English reformers; and when the story took
+wind three years after, concerning the plots and treasons of the
+corresponding societies and democrats, he was fain to make a moonlight
+flitting, leaving his wife for a time to manage his affairs. I could
+not, however, think any ill of the man notwithstanding; for he had very
+correct notions of right and justice, in a political sense, and when he
+came into the parish he was as orderly and well-behaved as any other
+body; and conduct is a test that I have always found as good for a man’s
+principles as professions. Nor, at the time of which I am speaking, was
+there any of that dread or fear of reforming the government that has
+since been occasioned by the wild and wasteful hand which the French
+employed in their revolution.
+
+But, among other improvements, I should mention that a Doctor Marigold
+came and settled in Cayenneville, a small, round, happy-tempered man,
+whose funny stories were far better liked than his drugs. There was a
+doubt among some of the weavers if he was a skilful Esculapian; and this
+doubt led to their holding out an inducement to another medical man, Dr.
+Tanzey, to settle there likewise, by which it grew into a saying, that at
+Cayenneville there was a doctor for health as well as sickness; for Dr.
+Marigold was one of the best hands in the country at a pleasant
+punch-bowl, while Dr. Tanzey had all the requisite knowledge for the
+faculty for the bedside.
+
+It was in this year that the hour-plate and hand on the kirk steeple were
+renewed, as indeed, may yet be seen by the date, though it be again
+greatly in want of fresh gilding; for it was by my advice that the
+figures of the Ann. Dom. were placed one in each corner. In this year,
+likewise, the bridge over the Brawl burn was built—a great convenience,
+in the winter time, to the parishioners that lived on the north side; for
+when there happened to be a spait on the Sunday, it kept them from the
+kirk; but I did not find that the bridge mended the matter, till after
+the conclusion of the war against the democrats, and the beginning of
+that which we are now waging with Boney, their child and champion. It
+is, indeed, wonderful to think of the occultation of grace that was
+taking place about this time, throughout the whole bound of Christendom;
+for I could mark a visible darkness of infidelity spreading in the corner
+of the vineyard committed to my keeping, and a falling away of the vines
+from their wonted props and confidence in the truths of Revelation. But
+I said nothing. I knew that the faith could not be lost, and that it
+would be found purer and purer the more it was tried; and this I have
+lived to see, many now being zealous members of the church, that were
+abundantly lukewarm at the period of which I am now speaking.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXII
+YEAR 1791
+
+
+IN the spring of this year, I took my son Gilbert into Glasgow, to place
+him in a counting-house. As he had no inclination for any of the learned
+professions, and not having been there from the time when I was sent to
+the General Assembly, I cannot express my astonishment at the great
+improvements, surpassing far all that was done in our part of the
+country, which I thought was not to be paralleled. When I came
+afterwards to reflect on my simplicity in this, it was clear to me that
+we should not judge of the rest of the world by what we see going on
+around ourselves, but walk abroad into other parts, and thereby enlarge
+our sphere of observation, as well as ripen our judgment of things.
+
+But although there was no doubt a great and visible increase of the city,
+loftier buildings on all sides, and streets that spread their arms far
+into the embraces of the country, I thought the looks of the population
+were impaired, and that there was a greater proportion of long white
+faces in the Trongate, than when I attended the Divinity class. These, I
+was told, were the weavers and others concerned in the cotton trade,
+which I could well believe, for they were very like in their looks to the
+men of Cayenneville; but from living in a crowded town, and not breathing
+a wholesome country air between their tasks, they had a stronger cast of
+unhealthy melancholy. I was therefore very glad that Providence had
+placed in my hand the pastoral staff of a country parish; for it cut me
+to the heart to see so many young men, in the rising prime of life,
+already in the arms of a pale consumption. “If, therefore,” said I to
+Mrs. Balwhidder, when I returned home to the manse, “we live, as it were,
+within the narrow circle of ignorance, we are spared from the pain of
+knowing many an evil; and, surely, in much knowledge there is sadness of
+heart.”
+
+But the main effect of this was to make me do all in my power to keep my
+people contented with their lowly estate; for in that same spirit of
+improvement, which was so busy every where, I could discern something
+like a shadow, that showed it was not altogether of that pure advantage
+which avarice led all so eagerly to believe. Accordingly, I began a
+series of sermons on the evil and vanity of riches, and, for the most
+part of the year, pointed out in what manner they led the possessor to
+indulge in sinful luxuries, and how indulgence begat desire, and desire
+betrayed integrity and corrupted the heart; making it evident that the
+rich man was liable to forget his unmerited obligations to God, and to
+oppress the laborious and the needful when he required their services.
+
+Little did I imagine, in thus striving to keep aloof the ravenous wolf
+Ambition from my guileless flock, that I was giving cause for many to
+think me an enemy to the king and government, and a perverter of
+Christianity, to suit levelling doctrines. But so it was. Many of the
+heritors considered me a blackneb, though I knew it not, but went on in
+the course of my duty, thinking only how best to preserve peace on earth
+and goodwill towards men. I saw, however, an altered manner in the
+deportment of several, with whom I had long lived in friendly terms. It
+was not marked enough to make me inquire the cause, but sufficiently
+plain to affect my ease of mind. Accordingly, about the end of this
+year, I fell into a dull way: my spirit was subdued, and at times I was
+aweary of the day, and longed for the night, when I might close my eyes
+in peaceful slumbers. I missed my son Gilbert, who had been a companion
+to me in the long nights, while his mother was busy with the lasses, and
+their ceaseless wheels and cardings, in the kitchen. Often could I have
+found it in my heart to have banned that never-ceasing industry, and to
+tell Mrs. Balwhidder, that the married state was made for something else
+than to make napery and beetle blankets; but it was her happiness to keep
+all at work, and she had no pleasure in any other way of life, so I sat
+many a night by the fireside with resignation; sometimes in the study,
+and sometimes in the parlour, and, as I was doing nothing, Mrs.
+Balwhidder said it was needless to light the candle. Our daughter Janet
+was in this time at a boarding-school in Ayr, so that I was really a most
+solitary married man.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIII
+YEAR 1792
+
+
+WHEN the spring in this year began to brighten on the brae, the cloud of
+dulness that had darkened and oppressed me all the winter somewhat melted
+away, and I could now and then joke again at the never-ending toil and
+trouble of that busiest of all bees, the second Mrs. Balwhidder. But
+still I was far from being right: a small matter affected me, and I was
+overly given to walking by myself, and musing on things that I could tell
+nothing about—my thoughts were just the rack of a dream without form, and
+driving witlessly as the smoke that mounteth up, and is lost in the airy
+heights of the sky.
+
+Heeding little of what was going on in the clachan, and taking no
+interest in the concerns of any body, I would have been contented to die,
+but I had no ail about me. An accident, however, fell out, that, by
+calling on me for an effort, had the blessed influence of clearing my
+vapours almost entirely away.
+
+One morning as I was walking on the sunny side of the road, where the
+footpath was in the next year made to the cotton-mill, I fell in with Mr.
+Cayenne, who was seemingly much fashed—a small matter could do that at
+any time; and he came up to me with a red face and an angry eye. It was
+not my intent to speak to him; for I was grown loth to enter into
+conversation with any body, so I bowed and passed on. “What,” cried Mr.
+Cayenne, “and will you not speak to me?” I turned round, and said
+meekly, “Mr. Cayenne, I have no objections to speak to you; but having
+nothing particular to say, it did not seem necessary just now.”
+
+He looked at me like a gled, and in a minute exclaimed, “Mad, by Jupiter!
+as mad as a March hare!” He then entered into conversation with me, and
+said, that he had noticed me an altered man, and was just so far on his
+way to the manse, to enquire what had befallen me. So, from less to
+more, we entered into the marrow of my case; and I told him how I had
+observed the estranged countenances of some of the heritors; at which he
+swore an oath, that they were a parcel of the damn’dest boobies in the
+country, and told me how they had taken it into their heads that I was a
+leveller. “But I know you better,” said Mr. Cayenne, “and have stood up
+for you as an honest conscientious man, though I don’t much like your
+humdrum preaching. However, let that pass; I insist upon your dining
+with me to-day, when some of these arrant fools are to be with us, and
+the devil’s in’t if I don’t make you friends with them.” I did not think
+Mr. Cayenne, however, very well qualified for peacemaker, but,
+nevertheless, I consented to go; and having thus got an inkling of the
+cause of that cold back-turning which had distressed me so much, I made
+such an effort to remove the error that was entertained against me, that
+some of the heritors, before we separated, shook me by the hands with the
+cordiality of renewed friendship; and, as if to make amends for past
+neglect, there was no end to their invitations to dinner which had the
+effect of putting me again on my mettle, and removing the thick and muddy
+melancholious humour out of my blood.
+
+But what confirmed my cure was the coming home of my daughter Janet from
+the Ayr boarding-school, where she had learnt to play on the spinnet, and
+was become a conversible lassie, with a competent knowledge, for a woman
+of geography and history; so that when her mother was busy with the
+weariful booming wheel, she entertained me sometimes with a tune, and
+sometimes with her tongue, which made the winter nights fly cantily by.
+
+Whether it was owing to the malady of my imagination throughout the
+greatest part of this year, or that really nothing particular did happen
+to interest me, I cannot say; but it is very remarkable that I have
+nothing remarkable to record—further, than I was at the expense myself of
+getting the manse rough-case, and the window cheeks painted, with roans
+put up, rather than apply to the heritors; for they were always sorely
+fashed when called upon for outlay.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIV
+YEAR 1793
+
+
+ON the first night of this year I dreamt a very remarkable dream, which,
+when I now recall to mind at this distance of time, I cannot but think
+that there was a case of prophecy in it. I thought that I stood on the
+tower of an old popish kirk, looking out at the window upon the kirkyard,
+where I beheld ancient tombs, with effigies and coats-of-arms on the wall
+thereof, and a great gate at the one side, and a door that led into a
+dark and dismal vault at the other. I thought all the dead that were
+lying in the common graves, rose out of their coffins; at the same time,
+from the old and grand monuments, with the effigies and coats-of-arms,
+came the great men, and the kings of the earth with crowns on their
+heads, and globes and sceptres in their hands.
+
+I stood wondering what was to ensue, when presently I heard the noise of
+drums and trumpets, and anon I beheld an army with banners entering in at
+the gate; upon which the kings and the great men came also forth in their
+power and array, and a dreadful battle was foughten; but the multitude
+that had risen from the common graves, stood afar off, and were but
+lookers-on.
+
+The kings and their host were utterly discomfited. They were driven
+within the doors of their monuments, their coats-of-arms were broken off,
+and their effigies cast down, and the victors triumphed over them with
+the flourishes of trumpets and the waving of banners. But while I
+looked, the vision was changed, and I then beheld a wide and a dreary
+waste, and afar off the steeples of a great city, and a tower in the
+midst, like the tower of Babel, and on it I could discern, written in
+characters of fire, “Public Opinion.” While I was pondering at the same,
+I heard a great shout, and presently the conquerors made their
+appearance, coming over the desolate moor. They were going in great
+pride and might towards the city; but an awful burning rose, afar as it
+were in the darkness, and the flames stood like a tower of fire that
+reached unto the heavens. And I saw a dreadful hand and an arm stretched
+from out of the cloud, and in its hold was a besom made of the hail and
+the storm, and it swept the fugitives like dust; and in their place I saw
+the churchyard, as it were, cleared and spread around, the graves closed,
+and the ancient tombs, with their coats-of-arms and their effigies of
+stone, all as they were in the beginning. I then awoke, and behold it
+was a dream.
+
+This vision perplexed me for many days, and when the news came that the
+King of France was beheaded by the hands of his people, I received, as it
+were, a token in confirmation of the vision that had been disclosed to me
+in my sleep, and I preached a discourse on the same, and against the
+French Revolution, that was thought one of the greatest and soundest
+sermons that I had ever delivered in my pulpit.
+
+On the Monday following, Mr. Cayenne, who had been some time before
+appointed a justice of the peace, came over from Wheatrig House to the
+Cross-Keys, where he sent for me and divers other respectable inhabitants
+of the clachan, and told us that he was to have a sad business, for a
+warrant was out to bring before him two democratical weaver lads, on a
+suspicion of high treason. Scarcely were the words uttered when they
+were brought in, and he began to ask them how they dared to think of
+dividing, with their liberty and equality of principles, his and every
+other man’s property in the country. The men answered him in a calm
+manner, and told him they sought no man’s property, but only their own
+natural rights; upon which he called them traitors and reformers. They
+denied they were traitors, but confessed they were reformers, and said
+they knew not how that should be imputed to them as a fault, for that the
+greatest men of all times had been reformers,—“Was not,” they said, “our
+Lord Jesus Christ a reformer?”—“And what the devil did he make of it?”
+cried Mr. Cayenne, bursting with passion; “Was he not crucified?”
+
+I thought, when I heard these words, that the pillars of the earth sank
+beneath me, and that the roof of the house was carried away in a
+whirlwind. The drums of my ears crackit, blue starns danced before my
+sight, and I was fain to leave the house and hie me home to the manse,
+where I sat down in my study, like a stupified creature, awaiting what
+would betide. Nothing, however, was found against the weaver lads; but I
+never from that day could look on Mr. Cayenne as a Christian, though
+surely he was a true government-man.
+
+Soon after this affair, there was a pleasant re-edification of a
+gospel-spirit among the heritors, especially when they heard how I had
+handled the regicides in France; and on the following Sunday, I had the
+comfortable satisfaction to see many a gentleman in their pews, that had
+not been for years within a kirk-door. The democrats, who took a world
+of trouble to misrepresent the actions of the gentry, insinuated that all
+this was not from any new sense of grace, but in fear of their being
+reported as suspected persons to the king’s government. But I could not
+think so, and considered their renewal of communion with the church as a
+swearing of allegiance to the King of kings, against that host of French
+atheists, who had torn the mortcloth from the coffin, and made it a
+banner, with which they were gone forth to war against the Lamb. The
+whole year was, however, spent in great uneasiness, and the proclamation
+of the war was followed by an appalling stop in trade. We heard of
+nothing but failures on all hands; and among others that grieved me, was
+that of Mr. Maitland of Glasgow, who had befriended Mrs. Malcolm in the
+days of her affliction, and gave her son Robert his fine ship. It was a
+sore thing to hear of so many breakings, especially of old respected
+merchants like him, who had been a Lord Provost, and was far declined
+into the afternoon of life. He did not, however, long survive the
+mutation of his fortune; but bending his aged head in sorrow, sank down
+beneath the stroke, to rise no more.
+
+ [Picture: The Minister’s Daughter]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXV
+YEAR 1794
+
+
+THIS year had opened into all the leafiness of midsummer before anything
+memorable happened in the parish, further than that the sad division of
+my people into government-men and jacobins was perfected. This calamity,
+for I never could consider such heartburning among neighbours as any
+thing less than a very heavy calamity, was assuredly occasioned by faults
+on both sides; but it must be confessed that the gentry did nothing to
+win the commonality from the errors of their way. A little more
+condescension on their part would not have made things worse, and might
+have made them better; but pride interposed, and caused them to think
+that any show of affability from them would be construed by the democrats
+into a terror of their power; while the democrats were no less to blame;
+for hearing how their compeers were thriving in France, and demolishing
+every obstacle to their ascendency, they were crouse and really insolent,
+evidencing none of that temperance in prosperity that proves the
+possessors worthy of their good fortune.
+
+As for me, my duty in these circumstances was plain and simple. The
+Christian religion was attempted to be brought into disrepute; the rising
+generation were taught to gibe at its holiest ordinances; and the kirk
+was more frequented as a place to while away the time on a rainy Sunday,
+than for any insight of the admonitions and revelations in the sacred
+book. Knowing this, I perceived that it would be of no effect to handle
+much the mysteries of the faith; but as there was at the time a bruit and
+a sound about universal benevolence, philanthropy, utility, and all the
+other disguises with which an infidel philosophy appropriated to itself
+the charity, brotherly love, and welldoing inculcated by our holy
+religion, I set myself to task upon these heads, and thought it no
+robbery to use a little of the stratagem employed against Christ’s
+kingdom, to promote the interests thereof in the hearts and
+understandings of those whose ears would have been sealed against me, had
+I attempted to expound higher things. Accordingly, on one day it was my
+practice to show what the nature of Christian charity was, comparing it
+to the light and warmth of the sun, that shines impartially on the just
+and the unjust—showing that man, without the sense of it as a duty, was
+as the beasts that perish, and that every feeling of his nature was
+intimately selfish, but then when actuated by this divine impulse, he
+rose out of himself, and became as a god, zealous to abate the sufferings
+of all things that live; and, on the next day, I demonstrated that the
+new benevolence which had come so much into vogue, was but another
+version of this Christian virtue. In like manner, I dealt with brotherly
+love, bringing it home to the business and bosoms of my hearers, that the
+Christianity of it was neither enlarged nor bettered by being baptized
+with the Greek name of philanthropy. With welldoing, however, I went
+more roundly to work, I told my people that I thought they had more sense
+than to secede from Christianity to become Utilitarians; for that it
+would be a confession of ignorance of the faith they deserved, seeing
+that it was the main duty inculcated by our religion to do all in morals
+and manners to which the newfangled doctrine of utility pretended.
+
+These discourses, which I continued for sometime, had no great effect on
+the men; but being prepared in a familiar household manner, they took the
+fancies of the young women, which was to me an assurance that the seed I
+had planted would in time shoot forth; for I reasoned with myself, that
+if the gudeman of the immediate generation should continue free-thinkers,
+their wives will take care that those of the next shall not lack that
+spunk of grace; so I was cheered under that obscurity which fell upon
+Christianity at this time, with a vista beyond, in which I saw, as it
+were, the children unborn, walking on the bright green, and in the
+unclouded splendour of the faith.
+
+But what with the decay of trade, and the temptation of the king’s
+bounty, and, over all, the witlessness that was in the spirit of man at
+this time, the number that enlisted in the course for the year from the
+parish was prodigious. In one week no less than three weavers and two
+cotton-spinners went over to Ayr, and took the bounty of the Royal
+Artillery. But I could not help remarking to myself, that the people
+were grown so used to changes and extraordinary adventures, that the
+single enlistment of Thomas Wilson, at the beginning of the American war,
+occasioned a far greater grief and work among us, than all the swarms
+that went off week after week in the months of November and December of
+this year.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVI
+YEAR 1795
+
+
+THE present Ann. Dom. was ushered in with an event that I had never
+dreaded to see in my day, in our once sober and religious country parish.
+The number of lads that had gone over to Ayr to be soldiers from among
+the spinners and weavers of Cayenneville had been so great, that the
+government got note of it, and sent a recruiting party to be quartered in
+the town; for the term clachan was beginning by this time to wear out of
+fashion: indeed, the place itself was outgrowing the fitness of that
+title. Never shall I forget the dunt that the first tap of the drum gied
+to my heart, as I was sitting on Hansel Monday by myself at the parlour
+fireside, Mrs. Balwhidder being throng with the lassies looking out a
+washing, and my daughter at Ayr, spending a few days with her old
+comrades of the boarding school. I thought it was the enemy; and then
+anon the sound of the fife came shrill to the ear, for the night was lown
+and peaceful. My wife and all the lassies came flying in upon me, crying
+all in the name of heaven, what could it be? by which I was obligated to
+put on my big-coat, and, with my hat and staff, go out to enquire. The
+whole town was aloof, the aged at the doors in clusters, and the bairns
+following the tattoo, as it was called, and at every doubling beat of the
+drum, shouting as if they had been in the face of their foemen.
+
+Mr. Archibald Dozendale, one of my elders, was saying to several persons
+around him, just as I came up, “Hech, sirs! but the battle draws near our
+gates,” upon which there was a heavy sigh from all that heard him; and
+then they told me of the sergeant’s business; and we had a serious
+communing together anent the same. But while we were thus standing
+discoursing on the causey, Mrs. Balwhidder and the servant lassies could
+thole no longer, but in a troop came in quest of me, to hear what was
+doing. In short, it was a night both of sorrow and anxiety. Mr.
+Dozendale walked back to the manse with us, and we had a sober tumbler of
+toddy together; marvelling exceedingly where these fearful portents and
+changes would stop, both of us being of opinion that the end of the world
+was drawing nearer and nearer.
+
+Whether it was, however, that the lads belonging to the place did not
+like to show themselves with the enlistment cockades among their
+acquaintance, or that there was any other reason, I cannot take it upon
+me to say; but certain it is, the recruiting party came no speed, and, in
+consequence, were removed about the end of March.
+
+Another thing happened in this year, too remarkable for me to neglect to
+put on record, as it strangely and strikingly marked the rapid
+revolutions that were going on. In the month of August at the time of
+the fair, a gang of playactors came, and hired Thomas Thacklan’s barn for
+their enactments. They were the first of that clanjamfrey who had ever
+been in the parish; and there was a wonderful excitement caused by the
+rumours concerning them. Their first performance was _Douglas Tragedy_
+and the _Gentle Shepherd_: and the general opinion was, that the lad who
+played Norval in the play, and Patie in the farce, was an English lord’s
+son, who had run away from his parents rather than marry an old cracket
+lady with a great portion. But, whatever truth there might be in this
+notion, certain it is, the whole pack was in a state of perfect beggary;
+and yet, for all that, they not only in their parts, as I was told,
+laughed most heartily, but made others do the same; for I was constrained
+to let my daughter go to see them, with some of her acquaintance; and she
+gave me such an account of what they did, that I thought I would have
+liked to have gotten a keek at them myself. At the same time, I must own
+this was a sinful curiosity, and I stifled it to the best of my ability.
+Among other plays that they did, was one called _Macbeth and the
+Witches_, which the Miss Cayennes had seen performed in London, when they
+were there in the winter time with their father, for three months, seeing
+the world, after coming from the boarding-school. But it was no more
+like the true play of Shakespeare the poet, according to their account,
+than a duddy betheral, set up to fright the sparrows from the peas, is
+like a living gentleman. The hungry players, instead of behaving like
+guests at the royal banquet, were voracious on the needful feast of
+bread, and the strong ale, that served for wine in decanters. But the
+greatest sport of all was about a kail-pot, that acted the part of a
+caldron, and which should have sunk with thunder and lightning into the
+earth; however, it did quite as well, for it made its exit, as Miss
+Virginia said, by walking quietly off, being pulled by a string fastened
+to one of its feet. No scene of the play was so much applauded as this
+one; and the actor who did the part of King Macbeth made a most polite
+bow of thankfulness to the audience, for the approbation with which they
+had received the performance of the pot.
+
+We had likewise, shortly after the “Omnes exeunt” of the players, an
+exhibition of a different sort in the same barn. This was by two English
+quakers, and a quaker lady, tanners of Kendal, who had been at Ayr on
+some leather business, where they preached, but made no proselytes. The
+travellers were all three in a whisky, drawn by one of the best-ordered
+horses, as the hostler at the Cross-Keys told me, ever seen. They came
+to the Inn to their dinner, and meaning to stay all night, sent round, to
+let it be known that they would hold a meeting in Friend Thacklan’s barn;
+but Thomas denied they were either kith or kin to him: this, however, was
+their way of speaking.
+
+In the evening, owing to the notice, a great congregation was assembled
+in the barn, and I myself, along with Mr. Archibald Dozendale, went there
+likewise, to keep the people in awe; for we feared the strangers might be
+jeered and insulted. The three were seated aloft on a high stage,
+prepared on purpose, with two mares and scaffold-deals, borrowed from Mr.
+Trowel the mason. They sat long, and silent; but at last the spirit
+moved the woman, and she rose, and delivered a very sensible exposition
+of Christianity. I was really surprised to hear such sound doctrine; and
+Mr. Dozendale said, justly, that it was more to the purpose than some
+that my younger brethren from Edinburgh endeavoured to teach. So, that
+those who went to laugh at the sincere simplicity of the pious quakers,
+were rebuked by a very edifying discourse on the moral duties of a
+Christian’s life.
+
+Upon the whole, however, this, to the best of my recollection, was
+another unsatisfactory year. In this we were, doubtless, brought more
+into the world; but we had a greater variety of temptation set before us,
+and there was still jealousy and estrangement in the dispositions of the
+gentry, and the lower orders, particularly the manufacturers. I cannot
+say, indeed, that there was any increase of corruption among the rural
+portion of my people; for their vocation calling them to work apart, in
+the purity of the free air of heaven, they were kept uncontaminated by
+that seditious infection which fevered the minds of the sedentary
+weavers, and working like flatulence in the stomachs of the
+cotton-spinners, sent up into their heads a vain and diseased fume of
+infidel philosophy.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVII
+YEAR 1796
+
+
+THE prosperity of fortune is like the blossoms of spring, or the golden
+hue of the evening cloud. It delighteth the spirit, and passeth away.
+
+In the month of February my second wife was gathered to the Lord. She
+had been very ill for some time with an income in her side, which no
+medicine could remove. I had the best doctors in the country side to
+her; but their skill was of no avail, their opinions being that her ail
+was caused by an internal abscess, for which physic has provided no cure.
+Her death was to me a great sorrow; for she was a most excellent wife,
+industrious to a degree, and managed every thing with so brisk a hand,
+that nothing went wrong that she put it to. With her I had grown richer
+than any other minister in the presbytery; but, above all, she was the
+mother of my bairns, which gave her a double claim upon me.
+
+I laid her by the side of my first love, Betty Lanshaw, my own cousin
+that was, and I inscribed her name upon the same headstone; but time had
+drained my poetical vein, and I have not yet been able to indite an
+epitaph on her merits and virtues, for she had an eminent share of both.
+Her greatest fault—the best have their faults—was an over-earnestness to
+gather gear; in the doing of which I thought she sometimes sacrificed the
+comforts of a pleasant fireside; for she was never in her element but
+when she was keeping the servants eident at their work. But, if by this
+she subtracted something from the quietude that was most consonant to my
+nature, she has left cause, both in bank and bond, for me and her bairns
+to bless her great household activity.
+
+She was not long deposited in her place of rest till I had occasion to
+find her loss. All my things were kept by her in a most perjink and
+excellent order; but they soon fell into an amazing confusion; for, as
+she often said to me, I had a turn for heedlessness; insomuch, that
+although my daughter Janet was grown up, and able to keep the house, I
+saw that it would be necessary, as soon as decency would allow, for me to
+take another wife. I was moved to this chiefly by foreseeing that my
+daughter would in time be married, and taken away from me, but more on
+account of the servant lasses, who grew out of all bounds, verifying the
+proverb, “Well kens the mouse when the cat’s out of the house.” Besides
+this, I was now far down in the vale of years, and could not expect to be
+long without feeling some of the penalties of old age, although I was
+still a hail and sound man. It therefore behoved me to look in time for
+a helpmate, to tend me in my approaching infirmities.
+
+Upon this important concern I reflected, as I may say, in the watches of
+the night; and, considering the circumstances of my situation, I saw it
+would not do for me to look out for an overly young woman, nor yet would
+it do for one of my ways to take an elderly maiden, ladies of that sort
+being liable to possess strong-set particularities. I therefore resolved
+that my choice should lie among widows of a discreet age; and I had a
+glimmer in my mind of speaking to Mrs. Malcolm; but when I reflected on
+the saintly steadiness of her character, I was satisfied it would be of
+no use to think of her. Accordingly, I bent my brows, and looked towards
+Irville, which is an abundant trone for widows and other single women;
+and I fixed my purpose on Mrs. Nugent, the relic of a professor in the
+university of Glasgow, both because she was a well-bred woman, without
+any children to plea about the interest of my own two, and likewise
+because she was held in great estimation by all who knew her, as a lady
+of a Christian principle.
+
+It was some time in the summer, however, before I made up my mind to
+speak to her on the subject; but one afternoon, in the month of August, I
+resolved to do so, and with that intent walked leisurely over to Irville;
+and after calling on the Rev. Dr. Dinwiddie, the minister, I stepped in,
+as if by chance, to Mrs. Nugent’s. I could see that she was a little
+surprised at my visit; however, she treated me with every possible
+civility, and her servant lass bringing in the tea-things in a most
+orderly manner, as punctually as the clock was striking, she invited me
+to sit still, and drink my tea with her; which I did, being none
+displeased to get such encouragement. However, I said nothing that time,
+but returned to the manse, very well content with what I had observed,
+which made me fain to repeat my visit. So, in the course of the week,
+taking Janet my daughter with me, we walked over in the forenoon, and
+called at Mrs. Nugent’s first, before going to any other house; and Janet
+saying, as we came out to go to the minister’s, that she thought Mrs.
+Nugent an agreeable woman, I determined to knock the nail on the head
+without further delay.
+
+Accordingly, I invited the minister and his wife to dine with us on the
+Thursday following; and before leaving the town, I made Janet, while the
+minister and me were handling a subject, as a sort of thing in common
+civility, go to Mrs. Nugent, and invite her also. Dr. Dinwiddie was a
+gleg man, of a jocose nature; and he, guessing something of what I was
+ettling at, was very mirthful with me; but I kept my own counsel till a
+meet season.
+
+On the Thursday, the company as invited came, and nothing extraordinary
+was seen; but in cutting up and helping a hen, Dr. Dinwiddie put one wing
+on Mrs. Nugent’s plate, and the other wing on my plate, and said, there
+have been greater miracles than these two wings flying together, which
+was a sharp joke, that caused no little merriment at the expense of Mrs.
+Nugent and me. I, however, to show that I was none daunted, laid a leg
+also on her plate, and took another on my own, saying, in the words of
+the reverend doctor, there have been greater miracles than that these two
+legs should lie in the same nest, which was thought a very clever come
+off; and, at the same time, I gave Mrs. Nugent a kindly nip on her sonsy
+arm, which was breaking the ice in as pleasant a way as could be. In
+short, before anything passed between ourselves on the subject, we were
+set down for a trysted pair; and this being the case, we were married as
+soon as a twelvemonth and a day had passed from the death of the second
+Mrs. Balwhidder; and neither of us have had occasion to rue the bargain.
+It is, however, but a piece of justice due to my second wife to say, that
+this was not a little owing to her good management; for she had left such
+a well-plenished house, that her successor said, we had nothing to do but
+to contribute to one another’s happiness.
+
+In this year nothing more memorable happened in the parish, saving that
+the cotton-mill dam burst about the time of the Lammas flood, and the
+waters went forth like a deluge of destruction, carrying off much
+victual, and causing a vast of damage to the mills that are lower down
+the stream. It was just a prodigy to see how calmly Mr. Cayenne acted on
+that occasion; for, being at other times as crabbed as a wud terrier,
+folk were afraid to tell him, till he came out himself in the morning and
+saw the devastation; at the sight of which he gave only a shrill whistle,
+and began to laugh at the idea of the men fearing to take him the news,
+as if he had not fortune and philosophy enough, as he called it, to
+withstand much greater misfortunes.
+
+ [Picture: The Weaver]
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVIII
+YEAR 1797
+
+
+WHEN I have seen in my walks the irrational creatures of God, the birds
+and the beasts, governed by a kindly instinct in attendance on their
+young, often has it come into my head that love and charity, far more
+than reason or justice, formed the tie that holds the world, with all its
+jarring wants and woes, in social dependence and obligation together;
+and, in this year, a strong verification of the soundness of this notion
+was exemplified in the conduct of the poor haverel lassie Meg Gaffaw,
+whose naturality on the occasion of her mother’s death I have related at
+length in this chronicle.
+
+In the course of the summer, Mr. Henry Melcomb, who was a nephew to Mr.
+Cayenne, came down from England to see his uncle. He had just completed
+his education at the college of Christ Church, in Oxford, and was the
+most perfect young gentleman that had ever been seen in this part of the
+country.
+
+In his appearance he was a very paragon, with a fine manly countenance,
+frank-hearted, blithe, and, in many points of character, very like my old
+friend the Lord Eaglesham, who was shot. Indeed, in some respects, he
+was even above his lordship; for he had a great turn at ready wit, and
+could joke and banter in a most agreeable manner. He came very often to
+the manse to see me, and took great pleasure in my company, and really
+used a freedom that was so droll, I could scarcely keep my composity and
+decorum with him. Among others that shared in his attention, was daft
+Meg Gaffaw, whom he had forgathered with one day in coming to see me; and
+after conversing with her for some time, he handed her, as she told me
+herself, over the kirk-stile like a lady of high degree, and came with
+her to the manse door linking by the arm.
+
+From the ill-timed daffin of that hour, poor Meg fell deep in love with
+Mr. Melcomb; and it was just a playacting to see the arts and antics she
+put in practice to win his attention. In her garb, she had never any
+sense of a proper propriety, but went about the country asking for
+shapings of silks and satins, with which she patched her duds, calling
+them by the divers names of robes and negligées. All hitherto, however,
+had been moderation, compared to the daffadile of vanity which she was
+now seen, when she had searched, as she said, to the bottom of her
+coffer. I cannot take it upon me to describe her; but she kythed in such
+a variety of cuffs and ruffles, feathers, old gumflowers, painted paper
+knots, ribbons, and furs, and laces, and went about gecking and simpering
+with an old fan in her hand, that it was not in the power of nature to
+look at her with sobriety.
+
+Her first appearance in this masquerading was at the kirk on the Sunday
+following her adventure with Mr. Melcomb, and it was with a sore
+difficulty that I could keep my eyes off her, even in prayer; and when
+the kirk skailed, she walked before him, spreading all her grandeur to
+catch his eye, in such a manner as had not been seen or heard of since
+the prank that Lady Macadam played Miss Betty Wudrife.
+
+Any other but Mr. Melcomb would have been provoked by the fool’s folly;
+but he humoured her wit, and, to the amazement of the whole people,
+presented her his hand, and allemanded her along in a manner that should
+not have been seen in any street out of a king’s court, and far less on
+the Lord’s day. But, alas! this sport did not last long. Mr. Melcomb
+had come from England to be ‘married’ to his cousin, Miss Virginia
+Cayenne, and poor daft Meg never heard of it till the banns for their
+purpose of marriage was read out by Mr. Lorimore on the Sabbath after.
+The words were scarcely out of his mouth, when the simple and innocent
+natural gave a loud shriek, that terrified the whole congregation, and
+ran out of the kirk demented. There was no more finery for poor Meg; but
+she went and sat opposite to the windows of Mr. Cayenne’s house, where
+Mr. Melcomb was, with clasped hands and beseeching eyes, like a
+monumental statue in alabaster, and no entreaty could drive her away.
+Mr. Melcomb sent her money, and the bride many a fine thing; but Meg
+flung them from her, and clasped her hands again, and still sat. Mr.
+Cayenne would have let loose the house-dog on her, but was not permitted.
+
+In the evening it began to rain, and they thought that and the coming
+darkness would drive her away; but when the servants looked out before
+barring the doors, there she was in the same posture. I was to perform
+the marriage ceremony at seven o’clock in the morning, for the young pair
+were to go that night to Edinburgh; and when I went, there was Meg
+sitting looking at the windows with her hands clasped. When she saw me
+she gave a shrill cry, and took me by the hand, and wised me to go back,
+crying out in a heart-breaking voice, “O, Sir! No yet—no yet! He’ll
+maybe draw back, and think of a far truer bride.” I was wae for her and
+very angry with the servants for laughing at the fond folly of the
+ill-less thing.
+
+When the marriage was over, and the carriage at the door, the bridegroom
+handed in the bride. Poor Meg saw this, and jumping up from where she
+sat, was at his side like a spirit, as he was stepping in, and, taking
+him by the hand, she looked in his face so piteously, that every heart
+was sorrowful, for she could say nothing. When he pulled away his hand,
+and the door was shut, she stood as if she had been charmed to the spot,
+and saw the chaise drive away. All that were about the door then spoke
+to her, but she heard us not. At last she gave a deep sigh, and the
+water coming into her eye, she said, “The worm—the worm is my bonny
+bridegroom, and Jenny with the many-feet my bridal maid. The mill-dam
+water’s the wine o’ the wedding, and the clay and the clod shall be my
+bedding. A lang night is meet for a bridal, but none shall be langer
+than mine.” In saying which words, she fled from among us, with heels
+like the wind. The servants pursued; but long before they could stop
+her, she was past redemption in the deepest plumb of the cotton-mill dam.
+
+Few deaths had for many a day happened in the parish, to cause so much
+sorrow as that of this poor silly creature. She was a sort of household
+familiar among us, and there was much like the inner side of wisdom in
+the pattern of her sayings, many of which are still preserved as
+proverbs.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIX
+YEAR 1798
+
+
+THIS was one of the heaviest years in the whole course of my ministry.
+The spring was slow of coming, and cold and wet when it did come; the
+dibs were full, the roads foul, and the ground that should have been dry
+at the seed-time, was as claggy as clay, and clung to the harrow. The
+labour of man and beast was thereby augmented; and all nature being in a
+state of sluggish indisposition, it was evident to every eye of
+experience that there would be a great disappointment to the hopes of the
+husbandman.
+
+Foreseeing this, I gathered the opinion of all the most sagacious of my
+parishioners, and consulted with them for a provision against the evil
+day, and we spoke to Mr. Cayenne on the subject, for he had a talent by
+common in matters of mercantile management. It was amazing, considering
+his hot temper, with what patience he heard the grounds of our
+apprehension, and how he questioned and sifted the experience of the old
+farmers, till he was thoroughly convinced that all similar seed-times
+were ever followed by a short crop. He then said, that he would prove
+himself a better friend to the parish than he was thought. Accordingly,
+as he afterwards told me himself, he wrote off that very night to his
+correspondents in America, to buy for his account all the wheat and flour
+they could get, and ship it to arrive early in the fall; and he bought up
+likewise in countries round the Baltic great store of victual, and
+brought in two cargoes to Irville on purpose for the parish, against the
+time of need, making for the occasion a garnel of one of the warehouses
+of the cotton-mill.
+
+The event came to pass as had been foretold: the harvest fell short, and
+Mr. Cayenne’s cargoes from America and the Baltic came home in due
+season, by which he made a terrible power of money, clearing thousands on
+thousands by post after post—making more profit, as he said himself, in
+the course of one month, he believed, than ever was made by any
+individual within the kingdom of Scotland in the course of a year.—He
+said, however that he might have made more if he had bought up the corn
+at home; but being convinced by us that there would be a scarcity, he
+thought it his duty as an honest man to draw from the stores and
+granaries of foreign countries, by which he was sure he would serve his
+country, and be abundantly rewarded. In short, we all reckoned him
+another Joseph when he opened his garnels at the cotton-mill, and, after
+distributing a liberal portion to the poor and needy, selling the
+remainder at an easy rate to the generality of the people. Some of the
+neighbouring parishes, however, were angry that he would not serve them
+likewise, and called him a wicked and extortionate forestaller; but he
+made it plain to the meanest capacity, that if he did not circumscribe
+his dispensation to our own bounds it would be as nothing. So that,
+although he brought a wonderful prosperity in by the cotton-mill, and a
+plenteous supply of corn in a time of famine, doing more in these things
+for the people than all the other heritors had done from the beginning of
+time, he was much reviled; even his bounty was little esteemed by my
+people, because he took a moderate profit on what he sold to them.
+Perhaps, however, these prejudices might be partly owing to their dislike
+of his hasty temper, at least I am willing to think so; for it would
+grieve me if they were really ungrateful for a benefit that made the
+pressure of the time lie but lightly on them.
+
+The alarm of the Irish rebellion in this year was likewise another source
+of affliction to us; for many of the gentry coming over in great straits,
+especially ladies and their children, and some of them in the hurry of
+their flight having but little ready money, were very ill off. Some four
+or five families came to the Cross-Keys in this situation, and the
+conduct of Mr. Cayenne to them was most exemplary. He remembered his own
+haste with his family from Virginia, when the Americans rebelled; and
+immediately on hearing of these Irish refugees, he waited on them with
+his wife and daughter, supplied them with money, invited them to his
+house, made ploys to keep up their spirits, while the other gentry stood
+back till they knew something of the strangers.
+
+Among these destitute ladies was a Mrs. Desmond and her two daughters, a
+woman of most august presence, being indeed more like one ordained to
+reign over a kingdom, than for household purposes. The Miss Desmonds
+were only entering their teens, but they also had no ordinary stamp upon
+them. What made this party the more particular, was on account of Mr.
+Desmond, who was supposed to be a united man with the rebels, and it was
+known his son was deep in their plots; yet although this was all told to
+Mr. Cayenne, by some of the other Irish ladies who were of the loyal
+connexion, it made no difference with him, but, on the contrary, he acted
+as if he thought the Desmonds the most of all the refugees entitled to
+his hospitable civilities. This was a wonderment to our strait-laced
+narrow lairds, as there was not a man of such strict government
+principles in the whole country side as Mr. Cayenne: but he said he
+carried his political principles only to the camp and the council. “To
+the hospital and the prison,” said he, “I take those of a man”—which was
+almost a Christian doctrine, and from that declaration Mr. Cayenne and me
+began again to draw a little more cordially together; although he had
+still a very imperfect sense of religion, which I attributed to his being
+born in America, where even as yet, I am told, they have but a scanty
+sprinkling of grace.
+
+But before concluding this year, I should tell the upshot of the
+visitation of the Irish, although it did not take place until some time
+after the peace with France.
+
+In the putting down of the rebels Mr. Desmond and his son made their
+escape to Paris, where they stayed till the treaty was signed, by which,
+for several years after the return to Ireland of the grand lady and her
+daughters, as Mrs. Desmond was called by our commonalty, we heard nothing
+of them. The other refugees repaid Mr. Cayenne his money with
+thankfulness, and, on their restoration to their homes, could not
+sufficiently express their sense of his kindness. But the silence and
+seeming ingratitude of the Desmonds vexed him; and he could not abide to
+hear the Irish rebellion mentioned without flying into a passion against
+the rebels, which every body knew was owing to the ill return he had
+received from that family. However, one afternoon, just about half an
+hour before his wonted dinner hour, a grand equipage, with four horses
+and outriders, stopped at his door, and who was in it but Mrs. Desmond
+and an elderly man, and a young gentleman with an aspect like a lord. It
+was her husband and son. They had come from Ireland in all their state
+on purpose to repay with interest the money Mr. Cayenne had counted so
+long lost, and to express in person the perpetual obligation which he had
+conferred upon the Desmond family, in all time coming. The lady then
+told him, that she had been so straitened in helping the poor ladies,
+that it was not in her power to make repayment till Desmond, as she
+called her husband, came home; and not choosing to assign the true
+reason, lest it might cause trouble, she rather submitted to be suspected
+of ingratitude than to an improper thing.
+
+Mr. Cayenne was transported with this unexpected return, and a friendship
+grew up between the families, which was afterwards cemented into
+relationship by the marriage of the young Desmond with Miss Caroline
+Cayenne. Some in the parish objected to this match, Mrs. Desmond being a
+papist: but as Miss Caroline had received an episcopalian education, I
+thought it of no consequence, and married them after their family
+chaplain from Ireland, as a young couple both by beauty and fortune well
+matched, and deserving of all conjugal felicity.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XL
+YEAR 1799
+
+
+THERE are but two things to make me remember this year; the first was the
+marriage of my daughter Janet with the reverend Dr. Kittlewood of
+Swappington, a match in every way commendable; and on the advice of the
+third Mrs. Balwhidder, I settled a thousand pounds down, and promised
+five hundred more at my death if I died before my spouse, and a thousand
+at her death if she survived me; which was the greatest portion ever
+minister’s daughter had in our country side. In this year likewise I
+advanced fifteen hundred pounds for my son in a concern in Glasgow,—all
+was the gathering of that indefatigable engine of industry the second
+Mrs. Balwhidder, whose talents her successor said were a wonder, when she
+considered the circumstances in which I had been left at her death, and
+made out of a narrow stipend.
+
+The other memorable was the death of Mrs. Malcolm. If ever there was a
+saint on this earth, she was surely one. She had been for some time
+bedfast, having all her days from the date of her widowhood been a tender
+woman; but no change made any alteration on the Christian contentment of
+her mind. She bore adversity with an honest pride; she toiled in the day
+of penury and affliction with thankfulness for her earnings, although
+ever so little. She bent her head to the Lord in resignation when her
+first-born fell in battle; nor was she puffed up with vanity when her
+daughters were married, as it was said, so far above their degree, though
+they showed it was but into their proper sphere by their demeanour after.
+She lived to see her second son, the captain, rise into affluence,
+married, and with a thriving young family; and she had the very great
+satisfaction, on the last day she was able to go to church, to see her
+youngest son the clergyman standing in my pulpit, a doctor of divinity,
+and the placed minister of a richer parish than mine. Well indeed might
+she have said on that day, “Lord, let thy servant depart in peace, for
+mine eyes have seen thy salvation.”
+
+For some time it had been manifest to all who saw her, that her latter
+end was drawing nigh; and therefore, as I had kept up a correspondence
+with her daughters, Mrs. Macadam and Mrs. Howard, I wrote them a
+particular account of her case, which brought them to the clachan. They
+both came in their own carriages; for Colonel Macadam was now a general,
+and had succeeded to a great property by an English uncle, his mother’s
+brother; and Captain Howard, by the death of his father, was also a man,
+as it was said, with a lord’s living. Robert Malcolm, her son the
+captain, was in the West Indies at the time; but his wife came on the
+first summons, as did William the minister.
+
+They all arrived about four o’clock in the afternoon, and at seven a
+message came for me and Mrs. Balwhidder to go over to them, which we did,
+and found the strangers seated by the heavenly patient’s bedside. On my
+entering, she turned her eyes towards me, and said, “Bear witness, sir,
+that I die thankful for an extraordinary portion of temporal mercies.
+The heart of my youth was withered like the leaf that is scared with the
+lightning; but in my children I have received a great indemnification for
+the sorrows of that trial.” She then requested me to pray, saying, “No;
+let it be a thanksgiving. My term is out, and I have nothing more to
+hope or fear from the good or evil of this world. But I have had much to
+make me grateful; therefore, sir, return thanks for the time I have been
+spared, for the goodness granted so long unto me, and the gentle hand
+with which the way from this world is smoothed for my passing.”
+
+There was something so sweet and consolatory in the way she said this,
+that although it moved all present to tears, they were tears without the
+wonted bitterness of grief. Accordingly, I knelt down and did as she had
+required, and there was a great stillness while I prayed. At the
+conclusion we looked to the bed, but the spirit had, in the mean time,
+departed, and there was nothing remaining but the clay tenement.
+
+It was expected by the parish, considering the vast affluence of the
+daughters, that there would have been a grand funeral, and Mrs. Howard
+thought it was necessary; but her sister, who had from her youth upward a
+superior discernment of propriety, said, “No, as my mother has lived, so
+shall be her end.” Accordingly, everybody of any respect in the clachan
+was invited to the funeral; but none of the gentry, saving only such as
+had been numbered among the acquaintance of the deceased. But Mr.
+Cayenne came unbidden, saying to me, that although he did not know Mrs.
+Malcolm personally, he had often heard she was an amiable woman, and
+therefore he thought it a proper compliment to her family, who were out
+of the parish, to show in what respect she was held among us; for he was
+a man that would take his own way, and do what he thought was right,
+heedless alike of blame or approbation.
+
+If, however, the funeral was plain, though respectable, the ladies
+distributed a liberal sum among the poor families; but before they went
+away, a silent token of their mother’s virtue came to light, which was at
+once a source of sorrow and pleasure. Mrs. Malcolm was first well
+provided by the Macadams, afterwards the Howards settled on her an equal
+annuity, by which she spent her latter days in great comfort. Many a
+year before, she had repaid Provost Maitland the money he sent her in the
+day of her utmost distress; and at this period he was long dead, having
+died of a broken heart at the time of his failure. From that time his
+widow and her daughters had been in very straitened circumstances; but
+unknown to all but herself, and HIM from whom nothing is hid, Mrs.
+Malcolm from time to time had sent them, in a blank letter, an occasional
+note to the young ladies to buy a gown. After her death, a bank-bill for
+a sum of money, her own savings, was found in her scrutoire, with a note
+of her own writing pinned to the same, stating, that the amount being
+more than she had needed for herself, belonged of right to those who had
+so generously provided for her; but as they were not in want of such a
+trifle, it would be a token of respect to her memory, if they would give
+the bill to Mrs. Maitland and her daughters, which was done with the most
+glad alacrity; and, in the doing of it, the private kindness was brought
+to light.
+
+ [Picture: The Millwright]
+
+Thus ended the history of Mrs. Malcolm, as connected with our Parish
+Annals. Her house was sold, and is the same now inhabited by the
+millwright, Mr. Periffery; and a neat house it still is, for the
+possessor is an Englishman, and the English have an uncommon taste for
+snod houses and trim gardens; but at the time it was built, there was not
+a better in the town, though it’s now but of the second class. Yearly we
+hear both from Mrs. Macadam and her sister, with a five-pound note from
+each to the poor of the parish, as a token of their remembrance; but they
+are far off, and, were any thing ailing me, I suppose the gift will not
+be continued. As for Captain Malcolm, he has proved, in many ways, a
+friend to such of our young men as have gone to sea. He has now left it
+off himself, and settled at London, where he latterly sailed from, and, I
+understand, is in a great way as a shipowner. These things I have
+thought it fitting to record, and will now resume my historical
+narration.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLI
+YEAR 1800
+
+
+THE same quietude and regularity that marked the progress of the last
+year, continued throughout the whole of this. We sowed and reaped in
+tranquillity, though the sough of distant war came heavily from a
+distance. The cotton-mill did well for the company, and there was a
+sobriety in the minds of the spinners and weavers, which showed that the
+crisis of their political distemperature was over;—there was something
+more of the old prudence in men’s reflections; and it was plain to see
+that the elements of reconciliation were coming together throughout the
+world. The conflagration of the French Revolution was indeed not
+extinguished, but it was evidently burning out; and their old reverence
+for the Grand Monarque was beginning to revive among them, though they
+only called him a consul. Upon the king’s fast I preached on this
+subject; and when the peace was concluded, I got great credit for my
+foresight, but there was no merit in’t. I had only lived longer than the
+most of those around me, and had been all my days a close observer of the
+signs of the times; so that what was lightly called prophecy and
+prediction, were but a probability that experience had taught me to
+discern.
+
+In the affairs of the parish, the most remarkable generality (for we had
+no particular catastrophe) was a great death of old people in the spring.
+Among others, Miss Sabrina, the school mistress, paid the debt of nature,
+but we could now better spare her than we did her predecessor; for at
+Cayenneville there was a broken manufacturer’s wife, an excellent
+teacher, and a genteel and modernised woman, who took the better order of
+children; and Miss Sabrina having been long frail (for she was never
+stout), a decent and discreet carlin, Mrs. M‘Caffie, the widow of a
+custom-house officer, that was a native of the parish, set up another for
+plainer work. Her opposition Miss Sabrina did not mind, but she was
+sorely displeased at the interloping of Mrs. Pirn at Cayenneville, and
+some said it helped to kill her—of that, however, I am not so certain;
+for Dr. Tanzey had told me in the winter, that he thought the sharp winds
+in March would blow out her candle, as it was burnt to the snuff;
+accordingly, she took her departure from this life, on the twenty-fifth
+day of that month, after there had, for some days prior, been a most cold
+and piercing east wind.
+
+Miss Sabrina, who was always an oddity and aping grandeur, it was found,
+had made a will, leaving her gatherings to her favourites, with all
+regular formality. To one she bequeathed a gown, to another this, and a
+third that, and to me a pair of black silk stockings. I was amazed when
+I heard this; but judge what I felt, when a pair of old marrowless
+stockings, darned in the heel, and not whole enough in the legs to make a
+pair of mittens to Mrs. Balwhidder, were delivered to me by her executor,
+Mr. Caption, the lawyer. Saving, however, this kind of flummery, Miss
+Sabrina was a harmless creature, and could quote poetry in discourse more
+glibly than texts of Scripture—her father having spared no pains on her
+mind: as for her body, it could not be mended; but that was not her
+fault.
+
+After her death, the session held a consultation, and we agreed to give
+the same salary that Miss Sabrina enjoyed to Mrs. M‘Caffie, which angered
+Mr. Cayenne, who thought it should have been given to the head mistress;
+and it made him give Mrs. Pirn, out of his own pocket, double the sum.
+But we considered that the parish funds were for the poor of the parish,
+and therefore it was our duty to provide for the instruction of the poor
+children. Saving, therefore, those few notations, I have nothing further
+to say concerning the topics and progress of this Ann. Dom.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLII
+YEAR 1801
+
+
+IT is often to me very curious food for meditation, that as the parish
+increased in population, there should have been less cause for matter to
+record. Things that in former days would have occasioned great discourse
+and cogitation, are forgotten with the day in which they happen; and
+there is no longer that searching into personalities which was so much in
+vogue during the first epoch of my ministry, which I reckon the period
+before the American war; nor has there been any such germinal changes
+among us, as those which took place in the second epoch, counting
+backward from the building of the cotton-mill that gave rise to the town
+of Cayenneville. But still we were not, even at this era, of which this
+Ann. Dom. is the beginning, without occasional personality, or an event
+that deserved to be called a germinal.
+
+Some years before, I had noted among the callans at Mr. Lorimore’s school
+a long soople laddie, who, like all bairns that grow fast and tall, had
+but little smeddum. He could not be called a dolt, for he was observant
+and thoughtful, and giving to asking sagacious questions; but there was a
+sleepiness about him, especially in the kirk, and he gave, as the master
+said, but little application to his lessons, so that folk thought he
+would turn out a sort of gaunt-at-the-door, more mindful of meat than
+work. He was, however, a good-natured lad; and, when I was taking my
+solitary walks of meditation, I sometimes fell in with him sitting alone
+on the brae by the water-side, and sometimes lying on the grass, with his
+hands under his head, on the sunny green knolls where Mr. Cylinder, the
+English engineer belonging to the cotton-work, has built the bonny house
+that he calls Diryhill Cottage. This was when Colin Mavis was a laddie
+at the school, and when I spoke to him, I was surprised at the discretion
+of his answers; so that gradually I began to think and say, that there
+was more about Colin than the neighbours knew. Nothing, however, for
+many a day, came out to his advantage; so that his mother, who was by
+this time a widow woman, did not well know what to do with him, and folk
+pitied her heavy handful of such a droud.
+
+By-and-by, however, it happened that one of the young clerks at the
+cotton-mill shattered his right-hand thumb by a gun bursting; and, being
+no longer able to write, was sent into the army to be an ensign, which
+caused a vacancy in the office; and, through the help of Mr. Cayenne, I
+got Colin Mavis into the place, where, to the surprise of everybody, he
+proved a wonderful eident and active lad, and, from less to more, has
+come at the head of all the clerks, and deep in the confidentials of his
+employers. But although this was a great satisfaction to me, and to the
+widow woman his mother, it somehow was not so much so to the rest of the
+parish, who seemed, as it were, angry that poor Colin had not proved
+himself such a dolt as they had expected and foretold.
+
+Among other ways that Colin had of spending his leisure, was that of
+playing music on an instrument, in which it was said he made a wonderful
+proficiency; but being long and thin, and of a delicate habit of body, he
+was obligated to refrain from this recreation; so he betook himself to
+books, and from reading he began to try writing; but, as this was done in
+a corner, nobody jealoused what he was about, till one evening in this
+year he came to the manse, and asked a word in private with me. I
+thought that perhaps he had fallen in with a lass, and was come to
+consult me anent matrimony; but when we were by ourselves, in my study,
+he took out of his pocket a number of the _Scots Magazine_, and said,
+“Sir, you have been long pleased to notice me more than any other body,
+and when I got this, I could not refrain from bringing it, to let you
+see’t. Ye maun ken, sir, that I have been long in secret given to trying
+my hand at rhyme; and, wishing to ascertain what others thought of my
+power in that way, I sent by the post twa three verses to the _Scots
+Magazine_, and they have not only inserted them, but placed them in the
+body of the book, in such a way that I kenna what to think.” So I looked
+at the Magazine, and read his verses, which were certainly very well-made
+verses for one who had no regular education. But I said to him, as the
+Greenock magistrates said to John Wilson, the author of “Clyde,” when
+they stipulated with him to give up the art, that poem-making was a
+profane and unprofitable trade, and he would do well to turn his talent
+to something of more solidity, which he promised to do; but he has since
+put out a book, whereby he has angered all those that had foretold he
+would be a do-nae-gude. Thus has our parish walked sidy for sidy with
+all the national improvements, having an author of its own, and getting a
+literary character in the ancient and famous republic of letters.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIII
+YEAR 1802
+
+
+“EXPERIENCE teaches fools,” was the first moral apothegm that I wrote in
+small text, when learning to write at the school, and I have ever since
+thought it was a very sensible reflection. For assuredly, as year after
+year has flown away on the swift wings of time, I have found my
+experience mellowing, and my discernment improving; by which I have, in
+the afternoon of life, been enabled to foresee what kings and nations
+would do, by the symptoms manifested within the bounds of the society
+around me. Therefore, at the beginning of the spring in this Ann. Dom.,
+I had misgivings at the heart, a fluttering in my thoughts, and
+altogether a strange uneasiness as to the stability of the peace and
+harmony that was supposed to be founded upon a steadfast foundation
+between us and the French people. What my fears principally took their
+rise from, was a sort of compliancy, on the part of those in power and
+authority, to cultivate the old relations and parts between them and the
+commonalty. It did not appear to me that this proceeded from any known
+or decided event, for I read the papers at this period daily; but from
+some general dread and fear, that was begotten, like a vapour out of the
+fermentation of all sorts of opinions; most people of any sagacity
+thinking that the state of things in France being so much of an antic,
+poetical, and playactor-like guise, that it would never obtain that
+respect, far less that reverence from the world, which is necessary to
+the maintenance of all beneficial government. The consequence of this
+was a great distrust between man and man, and an aching restlessness
+among those who had their bread to bake in the world; persons possessing
+the power to provide for their kindred, forcing them, as it were, down
+the throats of those who were dependent on them in business, a bitter
+morsel.
+
+But the pith of these remarks chiefly applies to the manufacturing
+concerns of the new town of Cayenneville; for in the clachan we lived in
+the lea of the dike, and were more taken up with our own natural rural
+affairs, and the markets for victual, than the craft of merchandise. The
+only man interested in business, who walked in a steady manner at his old
+pace, though he sometimes was seen, being of a spunkie temper, grinding
+the teeth of vexation, was Mr. Cayenne himself.
+
+One day, however, he came to me at the manse. “Doctor,” says he, for so
+he always called me, “I want your advice. I never choose to trouble
+others with my private affairs; but there are times when the word of an
+honest man may do good. I need not tell you, that when I declared myself
+a Royalist in America, it was at a considerable sacrifice. I have,
+however, nothing to complain of against government on that score; but I
+think it damn’d hard that those personal connexions, whose interests I
+preserved to the detriment of my own, should in my old age make such an
+ungrateful return. By the steps I took prior to quitting America, I
+saved the property of a great mercantile concern in London. In return
+for that, they took a share with me, and for me, in the cotton-mill; and
+being here on the spot, as manager, I have both made and saved them
+money. I have, no doubt, bettered my own fortune in the mean time.
+Would you believe it, doctor, they have written a letter to me, saying
+that they wish to provide for a relation, and requiring me to give up to
+him a portion of my share in the concern—a pretty sort of providing this,
+at another man’s expense! But I’ll be damn’d if I do any such thing! If
+they want to provide for their friend, let them do so from themselves,
+and not at my cost—What is your opinion?”
+
+This appeared to me a very weighty concern, and, not being versed in
+mercantile dealing, I did not well know what to say; but I reflected for
+some time, and then I replied, “As far, Mr. Cayenne, as my observation
+has gone in this world, I think that the giffs and the gaffs nearly
+balance one another; and when they do not, there is a moral defect on the
+failing side. If a man long gives his labour to his employer, and is
+paid for that labour, it might be said that both are equal; but I say no.
+For it’s in human nature to be prompt to change; and the employer, having
+always more in his power than his servant or agent, it seems to me a
+clear case, that in the course of a number of years, the master of the
+old servant is the obligated of the two; and therefore I say, in the
+first place, in your case there is no tie or claim, by which you may, in
+a moral sense, be called upon to submit to the dictates of your London
+correspondents; but there is a reason, in the nature of the thing and
+case, by which you may ask a favour from them—So, the advice I would give
+you would be this: write an answer to their letter, and tell them that
+you have no objection to the taking in of a new partner, but you think it
+would be proper to revise all the copartnery, especially as you have,
+considering the manner in which you have advanced the business, been of
+opinion, that your share should be considerably enlarged.”
+
+I thought Mr. Cayenne would have louped out of his skin with mirth at
+this notion; and, being a prompt man, he sat down at my scrutoire, and
+answered the letter which gave him so much uneasiness. No notice was
+taken of it for some time; but in the course of a month he was informed,
+that it was not considered expedient at that time to make any change in
+the company. I thought the old man was gone by himself when he got this
+letter. He came over instantly in his chariot, from the cotton-mill
+office to the manse, and swore an oath, by some dreadful name, that I was
+a Solomon. However, I only mention this to show how experience had
+instructed me, and as a sample of that sinister provisioning of friends
+that was going on in the world at this time—all owing, as I do verily
+believe, to the uncertain state of governments and national affairs.
+
+Besides these generalities, I observed another thing working to
+effect—mankind read more, and the spirit of reflection and reasoning was
+more awake than at any time within my remembrance. Not only was there a
+handsome bookseller’s shop in Cayenneville, with a London newspaper
+daily, but magazines, and reviews, and other new publications.
+
+Till this year, when a chaise was wanted we had to send to Irville; but
+Mr. Toddy of the Cross-Keys being in at Glasgow, he bought an excellent
+one at the second-hand, a portion of the effects of a broken merchant, by
+which, from that period, we had one of our own, and it proved a great
+convenience; for I, who never but twice in my life before hired that kind
+of commodity, had it thrice during the summer, for a bit jaunt with Mrs.
+Balwhidder to divers places and curiosities in the county that I had not
+seen before, by which our ideas were greatly enlarged; indeed, I have
+always had a partiality for travelling, as one of the best means of
+opening the faculty of the mind, and giving clear and correct notions of
+men and things.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIV
+YEAR 1803
+
+
+DURING the tempestuous times that ensued, from the death of the King of
+France by the hands of the executioner in 1793, there had been a
+political schism among my people that often made me very uneasy. The
+folk belonging to the cotton-mill, and the muslin-weavers in
+Cayenneville, were afflicted with the itch of jacobinism, but those of
+the village were stanch and true to king and country; and some of the
+heritors were desirous to make volunteers of the young men of them, in
+case of anything like the French anarchy and confusion rising on the side
+of the manufacturers. I, however, set myself, at that time, against
+this, for I foresaw that the French business was but a fever which would
+soon pass off; but no man could tell the consequence of putting arms in
+the hands of neighbour against neighbour, though it was but in the way of
+policy.
+
+But when Bonaparte gathered his host fornent the English coast, and the
+government at London were in terror of their lives for an invasion, all
+in the country saw that there was danger, and I was not backward in
+sounding the trumpet to battle. For a time, however, there was a
+diffidence among us somewhere. The gentry had a distrust of the
+manufacturers, and the farming lads were wud with impatience, that those
+who should be their leaders would not come forth. I, knowing this,
+prepared a sermon suitable to the occasion, giving out from the pulpit
+myself, the Sabbath before preaching it, that it was my intent, on the
+next Lord’s day, to deliver a religious and political exhortation on the
+present posture of public affairs. This drew a vast congregation of all
+ranks.
+
+I trow that the stoor had no peace in the stuffing of the pulpit in that
+day; and the effect was very great and speedy: for next morning the
+weavers and cotton-mill folk held a meeting, and they, being skilled in
+the ways of committees and associating together, had certain resolutions
+prepared, by which a select few was appointed to take an enrolment of all
+willing in the parish to serve as volunteers in defence of their king and
+country, and to concert with certain gentlemen named therein, about the
+formation of a corps, of which, it was an understood thing, the said
+gentlemen were to be the officers. The whole of this business was
+managed with the height of discretion; and the weavers, and spinners, and
+farming lads, vied with one another who should be first on the list. But
+that which the most surprised me, was the wonderful sagacity of the
+committee in naming the gentlemen that should be the officers. I could
+not have made a better choice myself; for they were the best built, the
+best bred, and the best natured, in the parish. In short, when I saw the
+bravery that was in my people, and the spirit of wisdom by which it was
+directed, I said in my heart, the Lord of Hosts is with us, and the
+adversary shall not prevail.
+
+ [Picture: The Silhouette]
+
+The number of valiant men which at that time placed themselves around the
+banners of their country was so great, that the government would not
+accept of all who offered; so, like as in other parishes, we were
+obligated to make a selection, which was likewise done in a most
+judicious manner, all men above a certain age being reserved for the
+defence of the parish, in the day when the young might be called to
+England to fight the enemy.
+
+When the corps was formed, and the officers named, they made me their
+chaplain, and Dr. Marigold their doctor. He was a little man with a big
+belly, and was as crouse as a bantam cock; but it was not thought he
+could do so well in field exercises, on which account he was made the
+doctor, although he had no repute in that capacity in comparison with Dr.
+Tanzey, who was not, however, liked, being a stiff-mannered man, with a
+sharp temper.
+
+All things having come to a proper head, the young ladies of the parish
+resolved to present the corps with a stand of colours, which they
+embroidered themselves, and a day was fixed for the presentation of the
+same. Never was such a day seen in Dalmailing. The sun shone brightly
+on that scene of bravery and grandeur, and far and near the country folk
+came flocking in; and we had the regimental band of music hired from the
+soldiers that were in Ayr barracks. The very first sound o’t made the
+hair on my old grey head to prickle up, and my blood to rise and glow as
+if youth was coming again into my veins.
+
+Sir Hugh Montgomerie was the commandant; and he came in all the glory of
+war, on his best horse, and marched at the head of the men to the
+green-head. The doctor and me were the rearguard: not being able, on
+account of my age and his fatness, to walk so fast as the quick-step of
+the corps. On the field, we took our place in front, near Sir Hugh and
+the ladies with the colours; and after some salutations, according to the
+fashion of the army, Sir Hugh made a speech to the men, and then Miss
+Maria Montgomerie came forward, with her sister Miss Eliza, and the other
+ladies, and the banners were unfurled, all glittering with gold, and the
+king’s arms in needlework. Miss Maria then made a speech, which she had
+got by heart; but she was so agitated that it was said she forgot the
+best part of it: however, it was very well considering. When this was
+done, I then stepped forward, and laying my hat on the ground, every man
+and boy taking off theirs, I said a prayer, which I had conned most
+carefully, and which I thought the most suitable I could devise, in
+unison with Christian principles, which are averse to the shedding of
+blood; and I particularly dwelt upon some of the specialities of our
+situation.
+
+When I had concluded, the volunteers gave three great shouts, and the
+multitude answered them to the same tune, and all the instruments of
+music sounded, making such a bruit as could not be surpassed for
+grandeur—a long, and very circumstantial account of all which, may be
+read in the newspapers of that time.
+
+The volunteers, at the word of command, then showed us the way they were
+to fight with the French, in the doing of which a sad disaster happened;
+for when they were charging bayonets, they came towards us like a flood,
+and all the spectators ran; and I ran, and the doctor ran; but being
+laden with his belly, he could not run fast enough, so he lay down, and
+being just before me at the time, I tumbled over him, and such a shout of
+laughter shook the field as was never heard.
+
+When the fatigues of the day were at an end, we marched to the
+cotton-mill, where, in one of the ware-houses, a vast table was spread,
+and a dinner, prepared at Mr. Cayenne’s own expense, sent in from the
+Cross-Keys, and the whole corps, with many of the gentry of the
+neighbourhood, dined with great jollity, the band of music playing
+beautiful airs all the time. At night there was a universal dance,
+gentle and semple mingled together. All which made it plain to me, that
+the Lord, by this unison of spirit, had decreed our national
+preservation; but I kept this in my own breast, lest it might have the
+effect to relax the vigilance of the kingdom. And I should note that
+Colin Mavis, the poetical lad, of whom I have spoken in another part,
+made a song for this occasion that was very mightily thought of, having
+in it a nerve of valiant genius, that kindled the very souls of those
+that heard it.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLV
+YEAR 1804
+
+
+IN conformity with the altered fashions of the age, in this year the
+session came to an understanding with me, that we should not inflict the
+common church censures for such as made themselves liable thereto; but we
+did not formally promulge our resolution as to this, wishing as long as
+possible to keep the deterring rod over the heads of the young and
+thoughtless. Our motive, on the one hand, was the disregard of the
+manufacturers in Cayenneville, who were, without the breach of truth, an
+irreligious people; and, on the other, a desire to preserve the ancient
+and wholesome admonitory and censorian jurisdiction of the minister and
+elders. We therefore laid it down as a rule to ourselves, that, in the
+case of transgressions on the part of the inhabitants of the new district
+of Cayenneville, we should subject them rigorously to a fine; but that
+for the farming-lads, we would put it in their option to pay the fine, or
+stand in the kirk.
+
+We conformed also in another matter to the times, by consenting to
+baptize occasionally in private houses. Hitherto it had been a strict
+rule with me only to baptize from the pulpit. Other parishes, however,
+had long been in the practice of this relaxation of ancient discipline.
+
+But all this on my part, was not done without compunction of spirit; for
+I was of opinion, that the principle of Presbyterian integrity should
+have been maintained to the uttermost. Seeing, however, the elders set
+on an alteration, I distrusted my own judgment, and yielded myself to the
+considerations that weighed with them; for they were true men, and of a
+godly honesty, and took the part of the poor in all contentions with the
+heritors, often to the hazard and damage of their own temporal welfare.
+
+I have now to note a curious thing, not on account of its importance, but
+to show to what lengths a correspondence had been opened in the parish
+with the farthest parts of the earth. Mr. Cayenne got a turtle-fish sent
+to him from a Glasgow merchant, and it was living when it came to the
+Wheatrig House, and was one of the most remarkable beasts that had ever
+been seen in our country side. It weighed as much as a well-fed calf,
+and had three kinds of meat in its body, fish, flesh, and fowl, and it
+had four water-wings, for they could not be properly called fins; but
+what was little short of a miracle about the creature, happened after the
+head was cutted off, when, if a finger was offered to it, it would open
+its mouth and snap at it, and all this after the carcass was divided for
+dressing.
+
+Mr. Cayenne made a feast on the occasion to many of the neighbouring
+gentry, to the which I was invited; and we drank lime-punch as we ate the
+turtle, which, as I understand, is the fashion in practice among the
+Glasgow West Indy merchants, who are famed as great hands with turtles
+and lime-punch. But it is a sort of food that I should not like to fare
+long upon. I was not right the next day; and I have heard it said, that
+when eaten too often, it has a tendency to harden the heart and make it
+crave for greater luxuries.
+
+But the story of the turtle is nothing to that of the Mass, which, with
+all its mummeries and abominations, was brought into Cayenneville by an
+Irish priest of the name of Father O’Grady, who was confessor to some of
+the poor deluded Irish labourers about the new houses and the
+cotton-mill. How he had the impudence to set up that memento of Satan,
+the crucifix, within my parish and jurisdiction, was what I never could
+get to the bottom of; but the soul was shaken within me, when, on the
+Monday after, one of the elders came to the manse, and told me that the
+old dragon of Popery, with its seven heads and ten horns, had been
+triumphing in Cayenneville on the foregoing Lord’s day! I lost no time
+in convening the session to see what was to be done; much, however, to my
+surprise, the elders recommended no step to be taken, but only a zealous
+endeavour to greater Christian excellence on our part, by which we should
+put the beast and his worshippers to shame and flight. I am free to
+confess, that, at the time, I did not think this the wisest counsel which
+they might have given; for, in the heat of my alarm, I was for attacking
+the enemy in his camp. But they prudently observed, that the days of
+religious persecution were past, and it was a comfort to see mankind
+cherishing any sense of religion at all, after the vehement infidelity
+that had been sent abroad by the French Republicans; and to this opinion,
+now that I have had years to sift its wisdom, I own myself a convert and
+proselyte.
+
+Fortunately, however, for my peace of mind, there proved to be but five
+Roman Catholics in Cayenneville; and Father O’Grady not being able to
+make a living there, packed up his Virgin Marys, saints, and painted
+Agneses in a portmanteau, and went off in the Ayr fly one morning for
+Glasgow, where I hear he has since met with all the encouragement that
+might be expected from the ignorant and idolatrous inhabitants of that
+great city.
+
+Scarcely were we well rid of Father O’Grady, when another interloper
+entered the parish. He was more dangerous, in the opinion of the
+session, than even the Pope of Rome himself; for he came to teach the
+flagrant heresy of Universal Redemption, a most consolatory doctrine to
+the sinner that is loth to repent, and who loves to troll his iniquity
+like a sweet morsel under his tongue. Mr. Martin Siftwell, who was the
+last ta’en on elder, and who had received a liberal and judicious
+education, and was, moreover, naturally possessed of a quick penetration,
+observed, in speaking of this new doctrine, that the grossest papist
+sinner might have some qualms of fear after he had bought the Pope’s
+pardon, and might thereby be led to a reformation of life; but that the
+doctrine of universal redemption was a bribe to commit sin, the wickedest
+mortal, according to it, being only liable to a few thousand years, more
+or less, of suffering, which, compared with eternity, was but a momentary
+pang, like having a tooth drawn for the toothache. Mr. Siftwell is a
+shrewd and clear-seeing man in points of theology, and I would trust a
+great deal to what he says, as I have not, at my advanced age, such a
+mind for the kittle crudities of polemical investigation that I had in my
+younger years, especially when I was a student in the Divinity Hall of
+Glasgow.
+
+It will be seen from all I have herein recorded, that, in the course of
+this year, there was a general resuscitation of religious sentiments; for
+what happened in my parish was but a type and index to the rest of the
+world. We had, however, one memorable that must stand by itself; for
+although neither death nor bloodshed happened, yet was it cause of the
+fear of both.
+
+A rumour reached us from the Clyde, that a French man-of-war had appeared
+in a Highland loch, and that all the Greenock volunteers had embarked in
+merchant vessels to bring her in for a prize. Our volunteers were just
+jumping and yowling, like chained dogs, to be at her too; but the
+colonel, Sir Hugh, would do nothing without orders from his superiors.
+Mr. Cayenne, though an aged man above seventy, was as bold as a lion, and
+came forth in the old garb of an American huntsman, like, as I was told,
+a Robin Hood in the play is; and it was just a sport to see him, feckless
+man, trying to march so crousely with his lean, shaking hands. But the
+whole affair proved a false alarm, and our men, when they heard it, were
+as well pleased that they had been constrained to sleep in their warm
+beds at home, instead of lying on coils of cables, like the gallant
+Greenock sharp-shooters.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVI
+YEAR 1805
+
+
+FOR some time I had meditated a reformation in the parish, and this year
+I carried the same into effect. I had often noticed with concern, that,
+out of a mistaken notion of paying respect to the dead, my people were
+wont to go to great lengths at their burials, and dealt round short-bread
+and sugar-biscuit, with wine and other confections, as if there had been
+no ha’d in their hands; which straitened many a poor family, making the
+dispensation of the Lord a heavier temporal calamity than it should
+naturally have been. Accordingly, on consulting with Mrs. Balwhidder,
+who has a most judicious judgment, it was thought that my interference
+would go a great way to lighten the evil. I therefore advised with those
+whose friends were taken from them, not to make that amplitude of
+preparation which used to be the fashion, nor to continue handing about
+as long as the folk would take, but only at the very most to go no more
+than three times round with the service. Objections were made to this,
+as if it would be thought mean; but I put on a stern visage, and told
+them, that if they did more I would rise up, and rebuke and forbid the
+extravagance. So three services became the uttermost modicum at all
+burials. This was doing much, but it was not all that I wished to do.
+
+I considered that the best reformations are those which proceed step by
+step, and stop at that point where the consent to what has been
+established becomes general; and so I governed myself, and therefore
+interfered no farther; but I was determined to set an example.
+Accordingly, at the very next dregy, after I partook of one service, I
+made a bow to the servitors and they passed on, but all before me had
+partaken of the second service; some, however, of those after me did as I
+did, so I foresaw that in a quiet canny way I would bring in the fashion
+of being satisfied with one service. I therefore, from that time, always
+took my place as near as possible to the door, where the chief mourner
+sat, and made a point of nodding away the second service, which has now
+grown into a custom, to the great advantage of surviving relations.
+
+But in this reforming business I was not altogether pleased with our
+poet; for he took a pawkie view of my endeavours, and indited a ballad on
+the subject, in the which he makes a clattering carlin describe what took
+place, so as to turn a very solemn matter into a kind of derision. When
+he brought his verse and read it to me, I told him that I thought it was
+overly natural; for I could not find another term to designate the cause
+of the dissatisfaction that I had with it; but Mrs. Balwhidder said that
+it might help my plan if it were made public; so upon her advice we got
+some of Mr. Lorimore’s best writers to make copies of it for
+distribution, which was not without fruit and influence. But a sore
+thing happened at the very next burial. As soon as the nodding away of
+the second service began, I could see that the gravity of the whole
+meeting was discomposed; and some of the irreverent young chiels almost
+broke out into even-down laughter, which vexed me exceedingly. Mrs.
+Balwhidder, howsoever, comforted me by saying, that custom in time would
+make it familiar, and by-and-by the thing would pass as a matter of
+course, until one service would be all that folk would offer; and truly
+the thing is coming to that, for only two services are now handed round,
+and the second is regularly nodded by.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVII
+YEAR 1806
+
+
+MR. CAYENNE of Wheatrig having for several years been in a declining way,
+partly brought on by the consuming fire of his furious passion, and
+partly by the decay of old age, sent for me on the evening of the first
+Sabbath of March in this year. I was surprised at the message, and went
+to the Wheatrig House directly, where, by the lights in the windows as I
+gaed up through the policy to the door, I saw something extraordinary was
+going on. Sambo, the blackamoor servant, opened the door, and, without
+speaking, shook his head; for it was an affectionate creature, and as
+fond of his master as if he had been his own father. By this sign I
+guessed that the old gentleman was thought to be drawing near his latter
+end; so I walked softly after Sambo up the stair, and was shown into the
+chamber where Mr. Cayenne, since he had been confined to the house,
+usually sat. His wife had been dead some years before.
+
+Mr. Cayenne was sitting in his easy chair, with a white cotton nightcap
+on his head, and a pillow at his shoulders to keep him straight. But his
+head had fallen down on his breast, and he breathed like a panting baby.
+His legs were swelled, and his feet rested on a footstool. His face,
+which was wont to be the colour of a peony rose, was of a yellow hue,
+with a patch of red on each cheek like a wafer; and his nose was shirpit
+and sharp, and of an unnatural purple. Death was evidently fighting with
+nature for the possession of the body. “Heaven have mercy on his soul!”
+said I to myself, as I sat down beside him.
+
+When I had been seated some time, the power was given him to raise his
+head as it were a-jee; and he looked at me with the tail of his eye,
+which I saw was glittering and glassy. “Doctor,” for he always called me
+doctor, though I am not of that degree, “I am glad to see you,” were his
+words, uttered with some difficulty.
+
+“How do you find yourself, sir?” I replied, in a sympathising manner.
+
+“Damned bad,” said he, as if I had been the cause of his suffering. I
+was daunted to the very heart to hear him in such an unregenerate state;
+but after a short pause I addressed myself to him again, saying, that “I
+hoped he would soon be more at ease; and he should bear in mind that the
+Lord chasteneth whom he loveth.”
+
+“The devil take such love!” was his awful answer, which was to me as a
+blow on the forehead with a mell. However, I was resolved to do my duty
+to the miserable sinner, let him say what he would. Accordingly, I
+stooped towards him with my hands on my knees, and said in a
+compassionate voice, “It’s very true, sir, that you are in great agony;
+but the goodness of God is without bound.”
+
+“Curse me if I think so, doctor!” replied the dying uncircumcised
+Philistine. But he added at whiles, his breathlessness being grievous,
+and often broken by a sore hiccup, “I am, however, no saint, as you know,
+doctor; so I wish you to put in a word for me, doctor; for you know that
+in these times, doctor, it is the duty of every good subject to die a
+Christian.”
+
+This was a poor account of the state of his soul; but it was plain I
+could make no better o’t, by entering into any religious discourse or
+controversy with him, he being then in the last gasp; so I knelt down and
+prayed for him with great sincerity, imploring the Lord, as an awakening
+sense of grace to the dying man, that it would please him to lift up,
+though it were but for the season of a minute, the chastening hand which
+was laid so heavily upon his aged servant; at which Mr. Cayenne, as if,
+indeed, the hand had been then lifted, cried out, “None of that stuff,
+doctor; you know that I cannot call myself his servant.”
+
+ [Picture: The Ruling Elder]
+
+Was ever a minister in his prayer so broken in upon by a perishing
+sinner! However, I had the weight of a duty upon me, and made no reply,
+but continued, “Thou hearest, O Lord, how he confesses his unworthiness!
+Let not thy compassion, therefore, be withheld, but verify to him the
+words that I have spoken in faith, of the boundlessness of thy goodness,
+and the infinite multitude of thy tender mercies.” I then calmly, but
+sadly, sat down, and presently, as if my prayer had been heard, relief
+was granted; for Mr. Cayenne raised his head, and giving me a queer look,
+said, “That last clause of your petition, doctor, was well put, and I
+think, too, it has been granted, for I am easier”—adding, “I have no
+doubt, doctor, given much offence in the world, and oftenest when I meant
+to do good; but I have wilfully injured no man; and as God is my judge,
+and his goodness, you say, is so great, he may, perhaps, take my soul
+into his holy keeping.” In saying which words, Mr. Cayenne dropped his
+head upon his breast, his breathing ceased, and he was wafted away out of
+this world with as little trouble as a blameless baby.
+
+This event soon led to a change among us. In the settling of Mr.
+Cayenne’s affairs in the Cotton-mill Company, it was found that he had
+left such a power of money, that it was needful to the concern, in order
+that they might settle with the doers under his testament, to take in
+other partners. By this Mr. Speckle came to be a resident in the parish,
+he having taken up a portion of Mr. Cayenne’s share. He likewise took a
+tack of the house and policy of Wheatrig. But although Mr. Speckle was a
+far more conversible man than his predecessor, and had a wonderful
+plausibility in business, the affairs of the company did not thrive in
+his hands. Some said this was owing to his having owre many irons in the
+fire; others, to the circumstances of the times: in my judgment, however,
+both helped; but the issue belongs to the events of another year. In the
+meanwhile, I should here note, that in the course of this current Ann.
+Dom. it pleased Heaven to visit me with a severe trial; the nature of
+which I will here record at length—the upshot I will make known
+hereafter.
+
+From the planting of inhabitants in the cotton-mill town of Cayenneville,
+or as the country folk, not used to used to such lang-nebbit words, now
+call it, Canaille, there had come in upon the parish various sectarians
+among the weavers, some of whom were not satisfied with the gospel as I
+preached it, and endeavoured to practise it in my walk and conversation;
+and they began to speak of building a kirk for themselves, and of getting
+a minster that would give them the gospel more to their own ignorant
+fancies. I was exceedingly wroth and disturbed when the thing was first
+mentioned to me; and I very earnestly, from the pulpit, next Lord’s day,
+lectured on the growth of newfangled doctrines; which, however, instead
+of having the wonted effect of my discourses, set up the theological
+weavers in a bleeze, and the very Monday following they named a
+committee, to raise money by subscription to build a meeting-house. This
+was the first overt act of insubordination, collectively manifested, in
+the parish; and it was conducted with all that crafty dexterity with
+which the infidel and jacobin spirit of the French Revolution had
+corrupted the honest simplicity of our good old hameward fashions. In
+the course of a very short time, the Canaille folk had raised a large
+sum, and seduced not a few of my people into their schism, by which they
+were enabled to set about building their kirk; the foundations thereof
+were not, however, laid till the following year, but their proceedings
+gave me a het heart, for they were like an open rebellion to my
+authority, and a contemptuous disregard of that religious allegiance
+which is due from the flock to the pastor.
+
+On Christmas-day the wind broke off the main arm of our Adam and Eve
+pear-tree; and I grieved for it more as a type and sign of the threatened
+partition, than on account of the damage, though the fruit was the
+juiciest in all the country side.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLVIII
+YEAR 1807
+
+
+THIS was a year to me of satisfaction in many points; for a greater
+number of my younger flock married in it, than had done for any one of
+ten years prior. They were chiefly the offspring of the marriages that
+took place at the close of the American war; and I was pleased to see the
+duplification of well-doing, as I think marrying is, having always
+considered the command to increase and multiply, a holy ordinance, which
+the circumstances of this world but too often interfere to prevent.
+
+It was also made manifest to me, that in this year there was a very
+general renewal in the hearts of men, of a sense of the utility, even in
+earthly affairs, of a religious life: in some, I trust it was more than
+prudence, and really a birth of grace. Whether this was owing to the
+upshot of the French Revolution, all men being pretty well satisfied in
+their minds, that uproar and rebellion make but an ill way of righting
+wrongs, or that the swarm of unruly youth the offspring, as I have said,
+of the marriages after the American war, had grown sobered from their
+follies, and saw things in a better light, I cannot take upon me to say.
+But it was very edifying to me, their minister, to see several lads who
+had been both wild and free in their principles, marrying with sobriety,
+and taking their wives to the kirk with the comely decorum of heads of
+families.
+
+But I was now growing old, and could go seldomer out among my people than
+in former days; so that I was less a partaker of their ploys and
+banquets, either at birth, bridal, or burial. I heard, however, all that
+went on at them, and I made it a rule, after giving the blessing at the
+end of the ceremony, to admonish the bride and bridegroom to ca’ canny,
+and join trembling with their mirth. It behoved me on one occasion,
+however, to break through a rule that age and frailty had imposed upon
+me, and to go to the wedding of Tibby Banes, the daughter of the
+betheral, because she had once been a servant in the manse, besides the
+obligation upon me, from her father’s part both in the kirk and kirkyard.
+Mrs. Balwhidder went with me, for she liked to countenance the
+pleasantries of my people; and, over and above all, it was a pay-wedding,
+in order to set up the bridegroom in a shop.
+
+There was, to be sure, a great multitude, gentle and semple, of all
+denominations, with two fiddles and a bass, and the volunteers’ fife and
+drum; and the jollity that went on was a perfect feast of itself, though
+the wedding-supper was a prodigy of abundance. The auld carles kecklet
+with fainness as they saw the young dancers; and the carlins sat on
+forms, as mim as May puddocks, with their shawls pinned apart, to show
+their muslin napkins. But, after supper, when they had got a glass of
+the punch, their heels showed their mettle, and grannies danced with
+their oyes, holding out their hands as if they had been spinning with two
+rocks. I told Colin Mavis, the poet, than an _Infare_ was a fine subject
+for his muse; and soon after he indited an excellent ballad under that
+title, which he projects to publish, with other ditties, by subscription;
+and I have no doubt a liberal and discerning public will give him all
+manner of encouragement, for that is the food of talent of every kind;
+and without cheering, no one can say what an author’s faculty naturally
+is.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLIX
+YEAR 1808
+
+
+THROUGH all the wars that have raged from the time of the King’s
+accession to the throne, there has been a gradually coming nearer and
+nearer to our gates, which is a very alarming thing to think of. In the
+first, at the time he came to the crown, we suffered nothing. Not one
+belonging to the parish was engaged in the battles thereof; and the news
+of victories, before they reached us, which was generally by word of
+mouth, were old tales. In the American war, as I have related at length,
+we had an immediate participation; but those that suffered were only a
+few individuals, and the evil was done at a distance, and reached us not
+until the worst of its effects were spent. And during the first term of
+the present just and necessary contest for all that is dear to us as a
+people, although, by the offswarming of some of our restless youth, we
+had our part and portion in common with the rest of the Christian world;
+yet still there was at home a great augmentation of prosperity, and every
+thing had thriven in a surprising manner; somewhat, however, to the
+detriment of our country simplicity. By the building of the cotton-mill,
+and the rising up of the new town of Cayenneville, we had intromitted so
+much with concerns of trade, that we were become a part of the great web
+of commercial reciprocities, and felt in our corner and extremity, every
+touch or stir that was made on any part of the texture. The consequence
+of this I have now to relate.
+
+Various rumours had been floating about the business of the cotton
+manufacturers not being so lucrative as it had been; and Bonaparte, as it
+is well known, was a perfect limb of Satan against our prosperity, having
+recourse to the most wicked means and purposes to bring ruin upon us as a
+nation. His cantrips, in this year, began to have a dreadful effect.
+
+For some time it had been observed in the parish, that Mr. Specle of the
+cotton-mill, went very often to Glasgow, and was sometimes off at a few
+minutes’ warning to London; and the neighbours began to guess and wonder
+at what could be the cause of all this running here, and riding there, as
+if the little-gude was at his heels. Sober folk augured ill o’t; and it
+was remarked, likewise, that there was a haste and confusion in his mind,
+which betokened a foretaste of some change of fortune. At last, in the
+fulness of time, the babe was born.
+
+On a Saturday night, Mr. Speckle came out late from Glasgow; on the
+Sabbath he was with all his family at the kirk, looking as a man that had
+changed his way of life; and on the Monday, when the spinners went to the
+mill, they were told that the company had stopped payment. Never did a
+thunder-clap daunt the heart like this news; for the bread in a moment
+was snatched from more than a thousand mouths. It was a scene not to be
+described, to see the cotton-spinners and the weavers, with their wives
+and children, standing in bands along the road, all looking and speaking
+as if they had lost a dear friend or parent. For my part, I could not
+bear the sight, but hid myself in my closet, and prayed to the Lord to
+mitigate a calamity which seemed to me past the capacity of man to
+remedy; for what could our parish fund do in the way of helping a whole
+town, thus suddenly thrown out of bread?
+
+In the evening, however, I was strengthened, and convened the elders at
+the manse to consult with them on what was best to be done; for it was
+well known that the sufferers had made no provision for a sore foot. But
+all our gathered judgments could determine nothing; and therefore we
+resolved to wait the issue, not doubting but that He who sends the night,
+would bring the day in His good and gracious time, which so fell out.
+Some of them who had the largest experience of such vicissitudes,
+immediately began to pack up their ends and their awls, and to hie them
+into Glasgow and Paisley in quest of employ; but those who trusted to the
+hopes that Mr. Speckle himself still cherished, lingered long, and were
+obligated to submit to sore distress. After a time, however, it was
+found that the company was ruined; and the mill being sold for the
+benefit of the creditors, it was bought by another Glasgow company, who,
+by getting a good bargain, and managing well, have it still, and have
+made it again a blessing to the country. At the time of the stoppage,
+however, we saw that commercial prosperity, flush as it might be, was but
+a perishable commodity, and from thence, both by public discourse and
+private exhortation, I have recommended to the workmen to lay up
+something for a reverse; and showed that, by doing with their bawbees and
+pennies what the great do with their pounds, they might in time get a
+pose to help them in the day of need. This advice they have followed,
+and made up a Savings Bank, which is a pillow of comfort to many an
+industrious head of a family.
+
+But I should not close this account of the disaster that befell Mr.
+Speckle, and the cotton-mill company, without relating a very melancholy
+case that was the consequence. Among the overseers there was a Mr.
+Dwining, an Englishman from Manchester, where he had seen better days,
+having had himself there of his own property, once as large a mill,
+according to report, as the Cayenneville mill. He was certainly a man
+above the common, and his wife was a lady in every point; but they held
+themselves by themselves, and shunned all manner of civility, giving up
+their whole attention to their two little boys, who were really like
+creatures of a better race than the callans of our clachan.
+
+On the failure of the company, Mr. Dwining was observed by those who were
+present to be particularly distressed: his salary being his all; but he
+said little, and went thoughtfully home. Some days after he was seen
+walking by himself with a pale face, a heavy eye, and slow step—all
+tokens of a sorrowful heart. Soon after, he was missed altogether;
+nobody saw him. The door of his house was however open, and his two
+pretty boys were as lively as usual, on the green before the door. I
+happened to pass when they were there, and I asked them how their father
+and mother were. They said they were still in bed, and would not waken,
+and the innocent lambs took me by the hand, to make me waken their
+parents. I know not what was in it, but I trembled from head to foot,
+and I was led in by the babies, as if I had not the power to resist.
+Never shall I forget what I saw in that bed.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+I found a letter on the table; and I came away, locking the door behind
+me, and took the lovely prattling orphans home. I could but shake my
+head and weep, as I gave them to the care of Mrs. Balwhidder, and she was
+terrified but said nothing. I then read the letter. It was to send the
+bairns to a gentleman, their uncle, in London. Oh! it is a terrible
+tale; but the winding-sheet and the earth is over it. I sent for two of
+my elders. I related what I had seen. Two coffins were got, and the
+bodies laid in them; and the next day, with one of the fatherless bairns
+in each hand, I followed them to the grave, which was dug in that part of
+the kirkyard where unchristened babies are laid. We durst not take it
+upon us to do more; but few knew the reason, and some thought it was
+because the deceased were strangers, and had no regular lair.
+
+I dressed the two bonny orphans in the best mourning at my own cost, and
+kept them in the manse till we could get an answer from their uncle, to
+whom I sent their father’s letter. It stung him to the quick, and he
+came down all the way from London, and took the children away himself.
+Oh! he was a vexed man when the beautiful bairns, on being told he was
+their uncle, ran into his arms, and complained that their papa and mamma
+had slept so long, that they would never waken.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER L
+YEAR 1809
+
+
+AS I come towards the events of these latter days, I am surprised to find
+myself not at all so distinct in my recollection of them as in those of
+the first of my ministry; being apt to confound the things of one
+occasion with those of another, which Mrs. Balwhidder says is an
+admonishment to me to leave off my writing. But, please God, I will
+endeavour to fulfil this as I have through life tried, to the best of my
+capacity, to do every other duty; and, with the help of Mrs. Balwhidder,
+who has a very clear understanding, I think I may get through my task in
+a creditable manner, which is all I aspire after; not writing for a vain
+world, but only to testify to posterity anent the great changes that have
+happened in my day and generation—a period which all the best-informed
+writers say, has not had its match in the history of the world since the
+beginning of time.
+
+By the failure of the cotton-mill company, whose affairs were not settled
+till the spring of this year, there was great suffering during the
+winter; but my people, those that still adhered to the establishment,
+bore their share of the dispensation with meekness and patience, nor was
+there wanting edifying monuments of resignation even among the
+stravaigers.
+
+On the day that the Canaille Meeting-house was opened, which was in the
+summer, I was smitten to the heart to see the empty seats that were in my
+kirk; for all the thoughtless, and some that I had a better opinion of,
+went to hear the opening discourse. Satan that day had power given to
+him to buffet me as he did Job of old; and when I looked around and saw
+the empty seats, my corruption rose, and I forgot myself in the
+remembering prayer; for when I prayed for all denominations of
+Christians, and worshippers, and infidels, I could not speak of the
+schismatics with patience, but entreated the Lord to do with the
+hobleshow at Cayenneville, as he saw meet in his displeasure, the which,
+when I came afterwards to think upon, I grieved at with a sore
+contrition.
+
+In the course of the week following, the elders, in a body, came to me in
+the manse, and after much commendation of my godly ministry, they said,
+that seeing I was now growing old, they thought they could not testify
+their respect for me in a better manner than by agreeing to get me a
+helper. But I would not at that time listen to such a proposal, for I
+felt no falling off in my powers of preaching; on the contrary, I found
+myself growing better at it, as I was enabled to hold forth, in an easy
+manner, often a whole half hour longer, than I could do a dozen years
+before. Therefore nothing was done in this year anent my resignation;
+but during the winter, Mrs. Balwhidder was often grieved, in the bad
+weather, that I should preach, and, in short, so worked upon my
+affections, that I began to think it was fitting for me to comply with
+the advice of my friends. Accordingly, in the course of the winter, the
+elders began to cast about for a helper; and during the bleak weather in
+the ensuing spring, several young men spared me from the necessity of
+preaching. But this relates to the concerns of the next and last year of
+my ministry. So I will now proceed to give an account of it, very
+thankful that I have been permitted, in unmolested tranquillity, to bring
+my history to such a point.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LI
+YEAR 1810
+
+
+MY tasks are all near a close; and in writing this final record of my
+ministry, the very sound of my pen admonishes me that my life is a burden
+on the back of flying Time, that he will soon be obliged to lay down in
+his great storehouse—the grave. Old age has, indeed, long warned me to
+prepare for rest; and the darkened windows of my sight show that the
+night is coming on, while deafness, like a door fast barred, has shut out
+all the pleasant sounds of this world, and inclosed me, as it were, in a
+prison, even from the voices of my friends.
+
+I have lived longer than the common lot of man, and I have seen, in my
+time, many mutations and turnings, and ups and downs, notwithstanding the
+great spread that has been in our national prosperity. I have beheld
+them that were flourishing like the green bay-trees, made desolate, and
+their branches scattered. But, in my own estate, I have had a large and
+liberal experience of goodness.
+
+At the beginning of my ministry I was reviled and rejected; but my honest
+endeavours to prove a faithful shepherd were blessed from on high, and
+rewarded with the affection of my flock. Perhaps, in the vanity of
+doting old age, I thought in this there was a merit due to myself, which
+made the Lord to send the chastisement of the Canaille schism among my
+people; for I was then wroth without judgment, and by my heat hastened
+into an open division the flaw that a more considerate manner might have
+healed. But I confess my fault, and submit my cheek to the smiter; and
+now I see that the finger of Wisdom was in that probation, and it was far
+better that the weavers meddled with the things of God, which they could
+not change, than with those of the King, which they could only harm. In
+that matter, however, I was like our gracious monarch in the American
+war; for though I thereby lost the pastoral allegiance of a portion of my
+people, in like manner as he did of his American subjects, yet, after the
+separation, I was enabled so to deport myself, that they showed me many
+voluntary testimonies of affectionate respect, and which it would be a
+vain glory in me to rehearse here. One thing I must record, because it
+is as much to their honour as it is to mine.
+
+When it was known that I was to preach my last sermon, every one of those
+who had been my hearers, and who had seceded to the Canaille meeting,
+made it a point that day to be in the parish kirk, and to stand in the
+crowd, that made a lane of reverence for me to pass from the kirk-door to
+the back-yett of the manse. And shortly after, a deputation of all their
+brethren, with their minister at their head, came to me one morning, and
+presented to me a server of silver, in token, as they were pleased to
+say, of their esteem for my blameless life, and the charity that I had
+practised towards the poor of all sects in the neighbourhood; which is
+set forth in a well-penned inscription, written by a weaver lad that
+works for his daily bread. Such a thing would have been a prodigy at the
+beginning of my ministry; but the progress of book-learning and education
+has been wonderful since, and with it has come a spirit of greater
+liberality than the world knew before, bringing men of adverse principles
+and doctrines into a more humane communion with each other; showing that
+it’s by the mollifying influence of knowledge the time will come to pass,
+when the tiger of papistry shall lie down with the lamb of reformation,
+and the vultures of prelacy be as harmless as the presbyterian doves;
+when the independent, the anabaptist, and every other order and
+denomination of Christians, not forgetting even those poor wee wrens of
+the Lord, the burghers and anti-burghers, who will pick from the hand of
+patronage, and dread no snare.
+
+On the next Sunday, after my farewell discourse, I took the arm of Mrs.
+Balwhidder, and with my cane in my hand, walked to our own pew, where I
+sat some time; but, owing to my deafness, not being able to hear, I have
+not since gone back to the church. But my people are fond of having
+their weans still christened by me, and the young folk, such as are of a
+serious turn, come to be married at my hands, believing, as they say,
+that there is something good in the blessing of an aged gospel minister.
+But even this remnant of my gown I must lay aside; for Mrs. Balwhidder is
+now and then obliged to stop me in my prayers, as I sometimes
+wander—pronouncing the baptismal blessing upon a bride and bridegroom,
+talking as if they were already parents. I am thankful, however, that I
+have been spared with a sound mind to write this book to the end; but it
+is my last task, and, indeed, really I have no more to say, saving only
+to wish a blessing on all people from on high, where I soon hope to be,
+and to meet there all the old and long-departed sheep of my flock,
+especially the first and second Mrs. Balwhidders.
+
+
+
+
+FOOTNOTES.
+
+
+{1} Dreghorn, Ayrshire, two miles from Irvine.
+
+{9} Irvine, Ayrshire.
+
+{17} Cognac.
+
+
+
+
+***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ANNALS OF THE PARISH***
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