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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Round the Block, by John Bell Bouton
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
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+
+
+
+
+Title: Round the Block
+
+Author: John Bell Bouton
+
+Release Date: May 3, 2004  [eBook #12243]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: iso-8859-1
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ROUND THE BLOCK***
+
+
+E-text prepared by Curtis Weyant, Charlie Kirschner, and the Project
+Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team
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+
+
+
+
+ROUND THE BLOCK
+
+An American Novel
+
+WITH ILLUSTRATIONS
+
+by
+
+JOHN BELL BOUTON
+
+1864
+
+
+
+
+
+
+[Illustration: MRS. SLAPMAN AT HOME--(Book First, Chap. IX.)]
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+
+BOOK FIRST.
+
+NEW YEAR'S DAY.
+
+   I. THE BLOCK.
+  II. THREE BACHELORS.
+ III. PEEPS.
+  IV. QUIGG.
+   V. PLEASURE AS BUSINESS.
+  VI. SOMETHING HIDDEN.
+ VII. THE BOY BOG.
+VIII. MALTBOY'S TWENTIETH AFFAIR.
+  IX. MRS. SLAPMAN AT HOME.
+   X. INFIRMITIES OF GENIUS.
+
+
+BOOK SECOND.
+
+POLISHING.
+
+   I. THE ENIGMA.
+  II. A DELICATE PROPOSITION.
+ III. AN AUXILIARY OF MODERN CIVILIZATION.
+  IV. MISS PILLBODY.
+   V. A FRIEND IN NEED.
+  VI. BRANCHING OUT.
+ VII. THE LITTLE PUPIL.
+
+
+BOOK THIRD.
+
+TRAIL OF THE SERPENT.
+
+   I. "ONE--TWO--THREE--FOUR."
+  II. THE FALLING BOARD.
+ III. SNEAKING JUSTIFIED.
+  IV. UP IN THE AIR.
+   V. TONGUES OF FIRE.
+
+
+BOOK FOURTH.
+
+CHILDREN OF THE WORLD.
+
+   I. MENDERT VAN QUINTEM AND SON.
+  II. BUYING GOOD BEHAVIOR.
+ III. THE YOUNG MONSTER.
+  IV. WESLEY TIFFINS.
+   V. THE PANORAMA OF AFRICA.
+
+
+BOOK FIFTH.
+
+MANOEUVRES.
+
+   I. STOLEN--MORE THAN A PURSE.
+  II. CONSOLATIONS OF HIGH ART.
+ III. LOVING AFAR OFF.
+  IV. LEGERDEMAIN.
+
+
+BOOK SIXTH.
+
+MYSTERIES OF THE NIGHT.
+
+   I. THE UNKNOWN HAND.
+  II. IN VAIN--IN VAIN.
+ III. THE CLASHING ORBS.
+  IV. A VISION OP HORRORS.
+   V. WHAT THE MORNING BROUGHT.
+
+
+BOOK SEVENTH.
+
+JOURNEYINGS AGAINST FATE.
+
+   I. PEA-SHOOTING AS A SCIENCE.
+  II. BY STEAM.
+ III. PIGWORTH, J.P.
+  IV. STOOP.
+   V. AN AUDIENCE ANALYZED.
+  VI. HUMORS OF THE MANY-HEADED.
+ VII. SCENES NOT IN THE BILLS.
+
+
+BOOK EIGHTH.
+
+A DRAMATIC INTERLUDE.
+
+   I. THE OVERTURE.
+  II. CURTAIN UP.
+ III. ACT SECOND.
+  IV. HOW THE PLAY ENDED.
+
+
+BOOK NINTH.
+
+THE INQUEST.
+
+   I. CORONER AND JURY.
+  II. STATEMENT OF THE PRISONER.
+ III. JUSTICE GOES TO DINNER.
+  IV. LIGHT IN THE PRISON.
+   V. THE SORROW OF WHITE HAIRS.
+  VI. WHAT PAPER, TYPES, AND INK CAN DO.
+ VII. PET AS A WITNESS.
+VIII. THE BENEFICENCE OF FIRE BELLS.
+  IX. AN OLD MAN'S OFFERING.
+
+
+BOOK TENTH.
+
+DONE ON BOTH SIDES.
+
+   I. A FISHER OF MEN.
+  II. PLAYING WITH THE LINE.
+ III. PULLING IN.
+  IV. THE FIRST OF MAY.
+   V. DEMOLITION OF CERTAIN AIR CASTLES.
+  VI. MR. WHEDELL'S CREDITORS IN CONVENTION ASSEMBLED.
+ VII. DEUS EX MACHINA.
+
+
+BOOK ELEVENTH.
+
+DISCOVERIES.
+
+   I. THE OLD HOUSE REVISITED.
+  II. A POSTHUMOUS SECRET.
+ III. OVERTOP FINDS A SENSIBLE WOMAN.
+  IV. INNOCENCE ON A SLIPPERY ROAD.
+   V. BOG'S OPEN SESAME.
+  VI. TRACKED.
+ VII. FOUND AND LOST.
+
+
+BOOK TWELFTH.
+
+SPECULATIONS--PECUNIARY AND MATRIMONIAL.
+
+   I. THE "COSMOPOLITAN WINDOW FASTENER."
+  II. MIDDLE-AGED CUPID.
+ III. SLAPMAN _vs_. SLAPMAN.
+  IV. HOW OVERTOP SEALED A CONTRACT IN A WAY UNKNOWN TO CHITTY.
+   V. A RETURNED CALIFORNIAN.
+  VI. REVELATIONS OF A LAUGH.
+
+
+BOOK THIRTEENTH.
+
+THE STRANGE LADY.
+
+   I. A STORY OP THE PAST.
+  II. POSSIBLE LOVE.
+ III. UNCLE AND NIECE.
+
+
+BOOK FOURTEENTH.
+
+HAPPY DAYS.
+
+   I. OWNERS OF THE BEAUTIFUL.
+  II. THE LAST OF A MYSTERY.
+ III. LOVE CROWNED.
+  IV. FIVE YEARS.
+
+
+
+
+BOOK FIRST.
+
+NEW YEAR'S DAY
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE BLOCK.
+
+On the east side of the block were four brownstone houses, wide, tall,
+and roomy. Seen from the street, they had the appearance of not being
+inhabited. In the upper stories, all the curtains or blinds were closely
+drawn. In the lower story, the heavy lace that hung in carefully
+careless folds on each side of the window, seemed never to have been
+disturbed since it left the upholsterer's hands. Whatever life and
+motion there might have been in the basement, were sheltered from
+observation by conical firs or square-clipped box borders, set out on
+strictly geometrical principles in each of the four front yards. The
+doors were ponderous and tight fitting, as if they were never meant to
+be opened; and the vivid polish of their surfaces showed no trace of
+human handling. No marks of feet could be detected on the smooth, heavy
+flagstones which led up from the sidewalk, or on the great steps flanked
+by massive balustrades. The four mansions, in their new, lofty, and
+apparently tenantless state, looked, like the occasional residences of
+people for some purpose of ceremony, rather than the dear homes of the
+small, loving, domestic circles that really lived there.
+
+Such was the outer view of the east side of the block, and it is the
+only view that the reader of this book will get; for it is the author's
+intention profoundly to respect the select seclusion of the occupants.
+
+Now, the west side of the block was in all respects, exactly opposite to
+the east side. The houses were built of bricks, dingy with the whirling
+dust of twenty years. Two of the three stories swarmed with women and
+children, always visible at all seasons; and the lower story was devoted
+to some kind of cheap trade. Wholesale business is gregarious in its
+ways; but it is the habit of retail business to scatter, so as to
+present, in the same neighborhood, no two people in exactly the same
+line. Thus it happened that, on the west side of the block, there was
+only one drygoods dealer, whose shop front and awning posts were
+festooned with calicoes and other fabrics, ticketed with ingeniously
+deformed figures, and bearing some attractive adjective, expressing the
+owners private and conscientious opinion of their excellence. There was
+one boot-maker, who strung up his products in long branches, like
+onions; and, although his business was not at all flourishing, solaced
+himself with the reflection that he had a monopoly of it on the block.
+There was one apothecary, between whose flashing red and yellow lights
+and those of his nearest rival there was a desirable distance. A
+solitary coffinmaker, a butcher, a baker, a newspaper vender, a barber,
+a confectioner, a hardware merchant, a hatter, and a tailor, each
+encroaching rather extensively on the sidewalk with the emblems of his
+trade, rejoiced in their exemption from a ruinous competition. The only
+people on the block whose interests appeared to clash, were the grocers,
+who flanked either corner, and made a large and delusive show of boxes,
+barrels, and tea chests; and it was strongly suspected that they were
+identical in interests, under different names, and maintained a secret
+league to catch all the custom of the vicinity.
+
+The south side was a gradation of buildings, from the two-story brick
+grocery on the west corner to the grandest of the stone mansions on the
+east. With the exception of two or three houses built in the early
+history of the block, and occupied by obstinate old proprietors, it
+presented such a regularly ascending line of roofs, that a giant could
+have walked up stairs from one end to the other. Although each house was
+built upon a plan peculiar to itself, and supposed to reflect the
+long-cherished views of the original owner, there were certain
+resemblances among them. This was sometimes the effect of a jealous
+rivalry; sometimes of imitation. In one dozen houses there was a costly
+struggle for supremacy in window curtains. In another dozen, the
+harmless contest pertained to Grecian urns crowned with flowers, or dry
+dolphins, tritons, or naiads, rising from the bosoms of little gravel
+beds in miniature front yards. In a third dozen, there was a perspective
+of broad iron balconies elegantly constructed for show, and sometimes
+put to hazardous use, on warm summer nights, by venturesome gentlemen
+with cigars, or ladies with fans.
+
+About the middle of the block was a colony of doctors, who had
+increased, in five years, from two to ten. Their march was eastward, and
+it could be calculated to a nicety how long it would be before the small
+black, gilt-lettered signs of their profession would press hard upon the
+great house at the corner. Why they thus congregated together, unless
+with the friendly purpose of relieving each other's patients in each
+other's absence, and so saving humanity from sudden suffering and death,
+was a mystery to everybody but themselves.
+
+The north side lacked variety. One part of it, comprising twenty lots,
+had been built up on speculation by an enterprising landowner. The
+houses were precisely alike, from coal cellar to chimney top, with front
+railings of exactly the same pattern, crowned with iron pineapples from
+the same mould, encompassing little plots of ground laid out in walks
+similar to the fraction of a hair; the sole ornaments of which were four
+little spruce trees, planted at equal distances apart.
+
+This row of houses was very distracting even to the occupants, with whom
+it was a feat of arithmetic to identify their homes in the daytime, and
+much more so at night, when the landmarks were shadowy and
+indistinguishable. Occasionally, well-meaning tenants found themselves
+pulling at wrong doorbells; and there was one man who got tipsy every
+Saturday night, and rang himself quite through the row before he tumbled
+in on his own hall carpet. It was in counting the spruce trees, he said,
+which had a perplexing way of doubling, that he invariably lost
+the track.
+
+In nearly every house on this block there was a piano. The piano was the
+great equalizer of the block. And, though in the loftier houses the
+pianos might have been larger and costlier, and unquestionably noisier,
+it did not follow that they were better played or pleasanter to hear
+than the humbler instruments which served to swell the tumultuous chorus
+in hours of morning practice. With regard to these pianos, it may here
+be observed, that a gentleman with a passion for statistics, who chanced
+to be well acquainted through the block, made the remarkable discovery
+that the players were usually unmarried ladies; and that, when they
+acquired husbands (as they occasionally did on that block), they put
+aside the piano as something quite incapable of contributing to their
+new-found happiness.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+THREE BACHELOKS.
+
+Near the centre of the north side of the block stood a house in which
+three men, who have much to do in this story, were whiling away an hour
+before dinner, at the edge of evening, in the month of December, 185-.
+The house had strange stones let in over the windows and door, and was
+broad and sturdy, and was entered by steps slightly worn, and was shaded
+by a tall and old chestnut tree, and showed many signs of age. It was
+because of these evidences of antiquity, although the house was in good
+preservation and vastly comfortable, that it had been picked out and
+rented by the three men, two weeks previously.
+
+Yet the three men exhibited no marks of age, past or coming, upon them.
+The oldest, Mr. Marcus Wilkeson, looked no more than thirty-two; but
+frankly owned to thirty-six. Being six feet and two inches high, having
+a slim figure, round face, smooth brow, gentle eyes, perfect teeth to
+the utmost extent of his laugh, and a head of hair free from the
+plague-spot of incipient baldness which haunts the young men of this
+generation, his appearance, now that he was confessedly a man, was very
+much like that of an overgrown boy. On the contrary, when he was really
+a boy, his extraordinary height (six feet at sixteen years) had given
+him the outward semblance of a premature man. Probably his long legs and
+arms, which were exceedingly supple, and were always swinging about with
+a certain juvenile awkwardness, contributed much to the youthfulness of
+his appearance.
+
+At the time of his introduction here, his legs were as quiet as in their
+nature they could be, having been elevated, for the greater comfort of
+the owner, to the top of a pianoforte, and presenting an inclination of
+forty-five degrees to Mr. Wilkeson's body, reposing calmly and smoking
+an antique pipe in his favorite chair below. One of his long arms was
+hanging listlessly by his side, and the other made a sharp projecting
+elbow, and terminated in the interior of his vest. This was the attitude
+which, of all possible adjustments of the human anatomy, Mr. Wilkeson
+preferred; and he always assumed it and his pipe the moment he had put
+on his dressing gown and Turkey slippers. He was well aware that popular
+treatises on the "Art of Behavior" and the "Code of Politeness" were
+extremely hard upon this disposition of the legs. His half-sister,
+Philomela Wilkeson, who was high authority, had often visited his legs
+with the severest censure, when, upon suddenly entering the room where
+he was seated, she found the offending members confronting her from the
+top of the piano, or the table, or a chair, or sometimes from the
+mantelpiece. While Marcus Wilkeson admitted the full force of her
+strictures as applied to legs in general, he claimed an exception for
+his legs, which were always in his own or other people's way when they
+rested on the floor, or were crossed after the many fashions popular
+with the short-legged part of mankind.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson's heretical opinion concerning legs was part of a system
+of independent views which he entertained of life generally. He had
+given up a profitable broker's shop in Wall street, a year before,
+because he had made a fortune ten times larger than he would ever spend.
+Having fulfilled the object for which he started in business, and for
+which he had toiled like a slave ten years, he conceived that nothing
+could be more sensible than to retire from it, make room for other
+deserving men, and enjoy his ample earnings in the ways which pleased
+him most, before an old age of money getting had deadened his five
+senses, his intellect, and his heart.
+
+Persons who knew Marcus Wilkeson well were aware that he was a shy,
+self-distrustful fellow, amiable, generous, and that the only faults
+which could possibly be alleged against him were an excessive fondness
+for old books, old cigars, and profitless meditations, and a catlike
+affection for quiet corners. And when his half-sister Philomela--who had
+no hypocritical concealment about her, thank heaven! and always told
+people what she thought of them--pronounced the first of those luxuries
+"trash," the second "disgusting," and the other two "idiotic," he met
+her candid criticisms with a pleasant laugh, and said that, at any rate,
+they hurt nobody but himself.
+
+To which Philomela invariably retorted: "But suppose every strapping
+fellow, at your time of life, should take to novel-reading, and such
+fooleries, what would become of the world, I would like to know?"
+
+And her brother, puffing out a long stream of smoke, would respond:
+"Suppose, my dear sister, every woman was destined to be an old maid, as
+you are, what would become of the world, _I_ would like to know?"
+
+The conversation always terminated at this point, by Philomela declaring
+that coarse personality was the refuge of weak-minded people when they
+could not answer arguments, and that, for her part, she would never take
+the trouble to say another plain, straightforward word for his good;
+whereupon there would be a truce, lasting sometimes a whole day.
+
+Fayette Overtop, the second of the three young men--the one looking out
+of the window, drumming idly on the glass, and continually tossing back
+his head to clear the long black hair from his brow, over which it hung
+in an incurable cowlick--was a short, compact, nervous person,
+twenty-five years old. Mr. Overtop had been educated for the law, but,
+finding the profession uncomfortably crowded when he came into it, had
+not yet achieved those brilliant triumphs which he once fondly imagined
+within his reach. For three years he had been in regular attendance at
+his office from nine A.M. to three P.M. (as per written card on the
+door), except in term time, when he was a patient frequenter of the
+courts. During these three years he had picked up something less than
+enough to pay his half of the rent of two small, dimly lighted, but
+expensive rooms on the fourth floor of a labyrinth in the lower part
+of the city.
+
+Mr. Overtop, when asked to explain this state of things, about which he
+made no concealment, always attributed it to a "lack of clients."
+
+If he had clients enough, and of the right kind, he felt confident that
+he could make a figure in the profession. Having few clients, and those
+in insignificant cases only, of course he had no opportunities for
+distinction. He could not stand in the street and beg for clients, or
+drag men forcibly into his chambers and compel them to be clients; and
+he would not degrade the dignity of his calling by advertising for
+clients, or taking any means whatever to get them, except by
+establishing a reputation for professional learning and integrity. The
+only inducement which he ever put in the way of clients, was a series of
+signs, outside the street door, on the first flight of stairs, at the
+head of the first landing, on the second flight of stairs, at the head
+of the second landing, and so on to the fourth floor, where the firm
+name of "Overtop & Maltboy" confronted the panting climber for the
+eighth and last time, painted in large gold letters on black tin, nailed
+to the office door.
+
+Mr. Overtop was willing to give clients every facility for finding him,
+when they had once started at the bottom of the building; and would, as
+it were, lead them gently on, by successive signs; but good luck and a
+good name, slowly but surely acquired, must do the rest.
+
+A snug property, of which Mr. Overtop spent less than the income,
+fortunately enabled him to indulge in these novel views, and to regard
+clients, much as they were desired, as by no means indispensable to his
+existence. In his unprofessional hours, Mr. Overtop was everything but a
+lawyer. He was chiefly a philosopher, a discoverer, a searcher after
+truth, a turner-up of undeveloped beauties in every-day things, which,
+he said, were rich in instruction when intelligently examined. He could
+trace out lines of beauty in a gridiron, and detect the subtle charm
+that lurks in the bootjack.
+
+As not unfrequently happens, in partnerships of business and of other
+descriptions, Matthew Maltboy--the young man standing before the blazing
+coal fire, and critically surveying his own person--was quite the
+opposite of Fayette Overtop. Maltboy was fat and calm. Portraits were in
+existence showing Maltboy as a young lad in a jacket and turn-down
+collar, having a slim, graceful figure, a delicate face, and a sad but
+interesting promise of early decay upon him. Other portraits, of the
+same original, taken at later periods of the photographic art,
+represented a gradual squaring out of the shoulders, a progressive
+puffiness in the cheeks, lips, and hands, incipient folds in the chin,
+and a prevalent swollen appearance over all of Matthew Maltboy that the
+artist permitted the sun to copy.
+
+Portraits of Maltboy for a series of years would have proved a valuable
+contribution to human knowledge, as showing the steady and remarkable
+changes through which a man who is doomed to be fat passes onward to his
+destiny. But Maltboy stopped sitting for portraits when he reached the
+age of twenty, deciding, as many another public character has done, to
+transmit only the earlier and more ethereal representations of himself
+to posterity.
+
+By some compensating law of Nature, there were given to Maltboy a light
+and cheerful heart, a tendency to laugh on the smallest provocation, and
+a nice susceptibility to the beautiful. Not the beautiful in rivers,
+forests, skies, and other inanimate things, but the beautiful in woman.
+And as Overtop was gifted to discover charms in material objects which
+were plain in other eyes, so Maltboy possessed the wonderful faculty of
+seeing beauty in female faces, where other people saw, perhaps, only a
+bad nose, dull eyes, and a pinched-up mouth. This mental endowment might
+have been a priceless gift to a portrait painter, who was desirous of
+gratifying his sitters; but it was for Matthew Maltboy a fatal
+possession. It had led him to love too many women too much at first
+sight, and to shift his admiration from one dear object to another with
+a suddenness and rapidity destructive to a well-ordered state
+of society.
+
+Though these multiplied transfers of affection occasionally caused some
+disappointment among the victims of Mr. Maltboy's inconstancy, it was
+wisely ordained that he should be the principal sufferer--that every new
+passion should involve him in new difficulties, and subject him to a
+degree of mental distress which would have reduced the flesh of any man
+not hopelessly predisposed to fatness. As Mr. Matthew Maltboy stood by
+the fire, he was not taking the profitable retrospective view of his
+life which he should have taken, but was glancing with an expression of
+concern at the circumference of a showy vest pattern which cut off the
+view of his legs.
+
+The apartment in which the three bachelors were keeping a meditative
+silence, was large, square, high, on the first floor back, commanding an
+ample prospect of neglected rear yards, and all the strange things that
+are usually huddled into those strictly private domains. The furniture
+of the room was rich and substantial, but not too good to be used. The
+chairs were none of those frail, slippery structures of horsehair and
+mahogany so inhospitably cold to the touch; but they were oak, high
+backed, deep, long armed, softly but stoutly cushioned with leather, and
+yawned to receive nodding tenants and send them comfortably to sleep
+amid the fragrant clouds of the after-dinner pipe or cigar.
+
+At one end of the room was Marcus Wilkeson's library, consisting of
+about five hundred volumes, of poems, novels, travels by land and sea,
+histories, and biographies, which the owner dogmatically held to be all
+the books in the world worth reading. The admission of a new book to
+this select company of standard worthies, Mr. Wilkeson was vain enough
+to regard as a high compliment to the author, and as a final settlement
+of any disputes which might have been abroad as to its merits.
+
+On another side of the room was a grand piano, open, and covered with
+the latest music, and sometimes played on in a surprisingly graceful
+manner by the fat fingers of Matthew Maltboy. On the walls hung some
+pictures, that were not unpleasant to look at. There were two portraits
+of danseuses, with little gauzy wings, and wands tipped with magic
+stars; one large, full-faced likeness of a pet actress, taken in just
+the right attitude to show the rounding shoulders, the lightly poised
+head, and the heavy hair, to the best advantage; some charming French
+prints, among them "Niobe and her Daughters" and "Di Vernon;" and a half
+dozen pictures of the fine old English stage-coach days. Over the
+fireplace were suspended several pairs of boxing gloves, garnishing the
+picture of a tall fellow in fighting attitude, whose prodigious muscles
+were only a little smaller than those of all the saints and angels of
+all the accredited masterpieces of ancient art. A pair of foils and
+masks, neatly arranged over each corner of the mantelpiece, completed
+the decorations of the room.
+
+The three bachelors had gone into housekeeping by way of experiment, as
+a relief from the tedium and oppression of hotels and boarding houses,
+and as an escape from female society, which was beginning to pall even
+upon the huge appetite of Matthew Maltboy.
+
+But two weeks of this self-imposed exile--with no female society but
+Miss Philomela Wilkeson, and Mash, the cook--proved rather too much for
+Matthew's fortitude. He yawned audibly.
+
+"I understand you," said Marcus; "you are sick of this."
+
+"Well--hum--it's a little prosy at times." Maltboy yawned again.
+
+"Incorrigible monster!" cried Marcus. "What shall we do with him, Top?"
+
+The person addressed swung back the rebellious cowlick from his
+forehead, as if to clear his thinking faculties from a load while he
+considered the grave question. "Do with him? Do with him? Oh! I'll tell
+you." Here the speaker's eyes flashed with the light of a great
+discovery. "Tether him like a horse, with a certain limited area to feed
+in. D'ye see? D'ye see?"
+
+"A horse? Can't say that I do," returned Mr. Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"And I can't say that _I_ do, either," added Mr. Matthew Maltboy. "A
+horse! Why not say a donkey? I should see it quite as well."
+
+"As you please," resumed the impetuous Overtop. "A donkey, then. Perhaps
+the metaphor will be better. What I mean--what you two are so dull as
+not to see--is to put this unreliable Maltboy on a moderate allowance of
+flirtation; to keep him, for example, within the limits of this block.
+D'ye see? D'ye catch the idea?"
+
+"It begins to dawn on me," said Wilkeson.
+
+"And I catch a ray or two of it," added Maltboy. But--"
+
+"Excuse me," interrupted Overtop, stepping between his two companions,
+and gesticulating wildly at each of them in turn, as if he would dart
+conviction into them like electricity from the tips of his fingers.
+"Here is a block full of people. Their houses are joined together, or
+nearly so, all the way round. The inhabitants hear each other's pianos
+playing and each other's babies squalling all day long. If a fire breaks
+out in the block, it may be all burned down together. If the measles
+makes its appearance on the block, it probably runs through it. Is there
+not, therefore, a community of dangers among us; and if of dangers, why
+not of pleasures? Why should not the inhabitants of a block be regarded
+as a distinct settlement, or tribe, whose members owe kindness and
+goodwill to each other before the rest of the world? Looking at it in
+the light of humanity, is it not our duty to know our neighbors?"
+
+"And Matt would say, To love them too--that is, the young and pretty
+ones," observed "Wilkeson.
+
+"Precisely," said Maltboy.
+
+"Excuse me," continued Overtop, deprecating further interruption with
+both hands. "That is the point I was just coming to. Since Maltboy
+_must_ have female society, and cannot be kept out of it by main force,
+why not give him the range of this block? Catch the idea, eh?--in its
+full force and bearings?"
+
+"Wilkeson and Maltboy implied, by nods, that they caught it.
+
+"And--ahem--I think I'll take the same range too," added Overtop. "Not
+because I care a pin about female society, but just to test my
+new theory."
+
+Cries of "Oh! oh!" from Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+Overtop laughed. "You'll be a convert to it yet, my good fellow."
+
+"Never," said Marcus, inflexibly, "so long as books and tobacco hold
+out."
+
+"We'll see," replied Overtop. "But let me think how we are to begin." He
+rubbed his nose with a forefinger, then tossed back the cowlick, and
+said, impetuously: "I have it--I have it! We know Quigg, the grocer, at
+the corner below, for we are customers of his. Of course, he has an
+immense number of customers on the block, and will make New Year's
+calls on all of them, in the way of business. Why can't he take us in
+tow? It's as plain as daylight."
+
+"Plain enough, I admit," said Marcus Wilkeson; "but what will Quigg's
+customers say?"
+
+"Poor fellow!" returned Overtop. "How feebly you hermits reason about
+society! If you had knocked round town on New Year's days, as Matt and I
+have often done, you would know that visitors are valued only because
+they swell the number of calls, and that it is entirely immaterial who
+they are, or who introduces them. The militia general, the banker, the
+judge, the D.D., the butcher, the drygoods clerk, are units of equal
+value on that day, each adding one more to the score which is privately
+kept behind the door. We shall be welcome; never fear for that. You must
+come with us, and see for yourself."
+
+"I thank you," said Marcus Wilkeson, laughing. "No such fooleries at my
+time of life."
+
+"Very well," said Overtop. "Matt and I will try to represent the new
+firm of bachelor housekeepers creditably. Matt will look after the
+pretty girls, and I after the sensible ones--that is, if there happen to
+be any on this block."
+
+"Agreed," observed Matthew Maltboy, catching a view of himself in a
+glass over the fireplace, and not wholly displeased with his appearance.
+
+"Another thought strikes me," said Overtop, explosively. "It's nearly
+half an hour to sunset. I am impatient to begin my acquaintance with our
+fellow citizens--our future friends, if I may so call them. Let us look
+out of the windows, and see what the excellent people are doing. Perhaps
+it may interest even a recluse and bookworm like you."
+
+"Nonsense," rejoined Marcus Wilkeson. "There's no curiosity in my
+composition."
+
+And yet, when his two companions stood at the window of the little back
+parlor, pressing their noses against the glass, and looking out, he
+could not resist the temptation to join them, although he thought
+proper to punch them in the ribs, and call them a pair of inquisitive
+puppies, by way of showing how much he was superior to the great human
+infirmity.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+PEEPS.
+
+The uniform row of houses on the other side of a dead waste of snow, to
+which the attention of the three friends was ardently directed,
+promised, at first sight, a poor return of instruction and
+entertainment. The rear view presented one dull stretch of bricks
+irregularly set even in those houses which displayed imposing fronts of
+brown stone. The blinds were of a faded green color, and broken. The
+stoops, the doors opening on them, and the steps leading down to the
+dirty, sodden snow, had a generic look of cheapness and frailty.
+"Whatever the censorious critic might say of the front, he could not
+charge the rear with false pretences; for there was apparent, all over
+it, an utter indifference to the opinions of mankind. Perhaps because
+the owners of the houses did not expect mankind to study their property
+from that point of view.
+
+"Say!" was Mr. Fayette Overtop's first remark, after a moment's
+observation; "do not those rustic fences on the roofs remind you of the
+sweet, fresh country in summer time?" Mr. Overtop alluded to the
+barriers which are erected to keep people from getting into each other's
+houses, and which are scaled not without difficulty even by cats.
+
+Neither of his friends answering this remark except by a quiet,
+incredulous smile, Overtop continued, a little pettishly:
+
+"And you really mean to tell me that that pastoral object, happily
+introduced on the roofs of houses, does not recall the green fields,
+daisies, babbling brooks, and cloudless skies of early boyhood? Humbug!"
+The speaker flattened his nose still more against the glass by way
+of emphasis.
+
+"You look for beauties among the chimney pots, while I search for them
+in back-parlor windows," said Matthew Maltboy. "Observe where I throw
+my eye now."
+
+Mr. Maltboy threw his eye toward a house near the middle of the block.
+His companions followed it, and saw a tall girl with prodigious skirts
+standing at a window, and looking, as they thought, at them. The view
+which she obtained was evidently not satisfactory, for with her
+handkerchief she wiped off the moisture from several of the panes; and,
+when the glass was clear to her liking, shook out the folds of her
+dress, and peered forth again, this time more decidedly, at the window
+occupied by the three friends. Her use of the handkerchief was not lost
+upon Maltboy, who straightway pulled out his extensive cambric, and
+polished up their window too. This improvement of the medium of vision
+on both sides, enabled the three friends to form some idea of the tall
+girl's personal charms. Her figure was straight; her hair was black; her
+eyes were brilliant; her complexion was healthy; she exhibited jewelry
+in her ears, on her neck, her bosom, her wrists, and her fingers; her
+dress gave her a great deal of trouble, as she leaned forward to
+look out.
+
+"Charming, is she not?" said Maltboy.
+
+"Hard to say, at this distance," returned Overtop, who, feeling
+neglected in the matter of the rustic fence, was controversially
+disposed.
+
+"You may find it so," said Maltboy; "but as for me, the flash of her
+eyes--there, now, for instance!--is convincing enough."
+
+"Perhaps you have seen her before," remarked Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"Perhaps," was that gentleman's answer, implying, by his accent and
+accompanying wink, that he had seen her repeatedly.
+
+"And said nothing about her to us, you inveterate humbug," added Marcus.
+
+Mr. Maltboy felt the compliment conveyed in the word "humbug"--as most
+people do when that accusation of shrewdness and deep dissembling is
+brought against them--and smiled.
+
+"I confess," he replied, as he polished the window simultaneously with
+the performance of that process across the way, "I confess I have
+noticed her several times; but what was the use of mentioning it to a
+pair of woman haters like you?"
+
+His two companions laughed pleasantly, thereby expressing their
+gratification at the return compliment involved in the phrase
+"woman haters."
+
+"You are such dull fellows now," continued Maltboy, "that perhaps you
+will say this fair stranger is not looking at us; that she does not
+desire to be seen by us--that is, by me; and that her rubbing of the
+window with a handkerchief is not a signal which she expects to be
+answered."
+
+"We say nothing," replied the disputatious Overtop. "We only wait for
+proof. It is easy to find out whether a signal is meant or not. Rub the
+window now."
+
+Maltboy did so, concluding the act with an unmistakable flourish of the
+handkerchief. Whereupon the tall girl averted her face, pulled down the
+curtain, and eclipsed herself.
+
+Wilkeson and Overtop laughed, and, with a common impulse, punched
+Maltboy triumphantly in the ribs--a friendly salute that was always
+vastly amusing to that gentleman.
+
+"Be it understood, at this stage of affairs," said Marcus, solemnly,
+"that I reject the Overtop theory, and wash my hands of all
+responsibility for Maltboy's misdeeds.--Hallo! There he is again."
+
+"Who? Where?" exclaimed his two friends.
+
+"In the house nearly opposite--the one with the grape arbor. Isn't he a
+fine old fellow?"
+
+Overtop and Maltboy looked, and there saw, sitting at a window, and
+placidly gazing out of it, an old gentleman with long and thick white
+hair, a ruddy face, a white neckcloth, and a large projecting shirt
+frill--which were all the peculiarities of person and dress that could
+be distinctly made out. He was smoking a long pipe, and placidly rocking
+himself to and fro. His appearance, through the two windows, was that
+of a finely preserved relic of a past generation,
+
+"He always has a long pipe in his mouth, and looks benignantly into the
+open air," said Wilkeson,
+
+"So even _you_ are not wholly devoid of curiosity, and do take some
+interest in the people on our block," remarked Matthew Maltboy,
+
+"I have noticed the old gentleman often, when I have been reading near
+the window; and own that I should like to know him. I think, too, from
+certain signs, that he would not object to knowing me. Unless I am much
+mistaken, he has bowed to me several times. But fearing that the
+supposed bow might have been nothing more than a sleepy nod, I have
+never ventured to answer it. Step back a moment, and see if he
+observes me."
+
+Maltboy and Overtop retired a few paces. A moment afterward, the old
+gentleman looked over to Wilkeson, and made a bow at him about which
+there could be no mistake.
+
+"Answer him." "Answer him," said his two friends. Acting upon this
+advice, Marcus Wilkeson, blushing, returned a courtly salute, which was
+immediately reciprocated by a still lower bow, and a pleasant smile from
+the old gentleman. Wilkeson bowed again, and added a smile. The old
+gentleman did the same; and this odd exchange of civilities was
+beginning to get awkward for Wilkeson, when the old gentleman's
+attention was suddenly called off.
+
+A slender young man, whose broad black mustache contrasted unpleasantly
+with the sallow whiteness of his face, dressed in the jauntiest costume
+of the period, and bearing in one hand a black cane with a large ivory
+handle, which looked, even in the distance, like a human leg, stood by
+the old gentleman's side. The old gentleman put down his pipe, seized
+the young man's disengaged hand, and gazed affectionately at him (so the
+three observers thought). Some conversation then took place between
+them, during which the old gentleman repeatedly pressed the young man's
+hand, and sometimes reached up and softly patted him on the shoulder.
+The young man appeared to receive the words and caresses of the old
+gentleman with a sullen indifference. Several times he pettishly drew
+his hand away, and at last shook his head fiercely, folded his arms, and
+seemed (though the spectators could only conjecture that) to stamp the
+floor with his foot. At this, the old gentleman bowed his head in his
+hands. The young man held his defiant attitude unmoved, until, glancing
+out of the window, he saw for the first time that he was watched. "With
+a jerk, he pulled down the curtain, and cut off a scene which the three
+observers had begun to find profoundly interesting.
+
+"Well," said Marcus Wilkeson, "though I have given up making calls as a
+business, I shall certainly take the New-Year's privilege of dropping in
+on the venerable unknown over the way."
+
+"Two things are plain," said Fayette Overtop. "One is, that the pale,
+rascally looking young man is the old man's son. Now, I don't suppose
+either of you will dispute that?" (Overtop paused a moment to receive
+and dispose of objections, but none were made.) "The other is, that the
+old fellow is immensely rich--worth a million or two, maybe. Perhaps you
+_would_ like to argue that point." Overtop smiled, as if nothing would
+give him greater pleasure than to annihilate a few dozen opinions to
+the contrary.
+
+"To save argument, as usual, we admit everything," responded Wilkeson.
+"But, pray condescend to tell us how you know this fine old boy to be
+superlatively rich."
+
+Overtop smiled upon his ignorant friends, and answered:
+
+"Because he wears a white cravat. The man isn't a clergyman, is he? Do
+clergymen smoke pipes? He isn't a Quaker, is he? Do Quakers, or those of
+them who indulge in white cravats, wear their coat collars turned down?
+Consult your own experience, now, and tell me whether you ever saw
+anybody but a very rich man (with the exceptions already stated) wearing
+a white cravat. I leave it to your candor."
+
+Wilkeson and Maltboy nodded their heads, as if stricken dumb with
+conviction.
+
+Overtop, gratified with this ready acquiescence, modestly went on to say
+that he would not undertake to explain the phenomenon; that task he left
+to some more philosophical mind. He contented himself with making a
+humble record of facts.
+
+"And now that each of you have made a discovery in the row of houses,
+let me try my luck." Overtop rubbed the window, looked out, and
+carefully surveyed the row from end to end, and back again. "Ah, I have
+it!" he said. "A real mystery, too. Look at that four-story house near
+the western end of the block, the one a trifle shabbier than its
+neighbors. Do you see, in the open window, a man with a pale,
+intellectual face, gray hair, and arms bare to the elbows, filing away
+at something held in a vise before him? Now he stops to examine a
+paper--a plan, probably--which he holds in his hand. Now he wipes the
+perspiration from his forehead. Can't you see him?"
+
+"Distinctly," was the joint reply.
+
+"What do you suppose he is doing?" asked Overtop.
+
+"No idea," said Wilkeson. "Perhaps mending a teakettle."
+
+"Or repairing an umbrella," suggested Maltboy.
+
+Overtop smiled, and said:
+
+"A person with the slightest powers of observation, would see that that
+man has genius in his face; that his thin arm is not used to hard
+mechanical labor; that his brain is so heated with great ideas, that he
+tries to cool it by opening the window. The tinkering of an umbrella or
+teakettle would not make a man sweat in midwinter. You won't deny the
+force of that suggestion."
+
+As he spoke, a young girl advanced from the back part of the room, and
+stood by the pale workman's side. She wore a bonnet, and a shawl
+tightly wrapped around her. Though the features of her face could not be
+distinguished in the distance, it was not hard to detect a pleasant
+expression in her eyes, a smile on her lips, and a high color on her
+cheeks, as if she had just come in from the street. She held up a little
+basket for the workman's inspection.
+
+He paused in his labor, took the girl's head between his hands, and
+kissed her fondly on the brow. Then he opened the little basket, and
+drew from it a loaf of bread and a piece of cheese, which he began
+eating hurriedly. He also seemed, by signs, to press the girl to eat;
+but she shook her head, smiled more than before, and looked up
+affectionately into his face. Having bolted a few mouthfuls, the workman
+placed the remains of the repast on the bench or table before him,
+kissed the young girl, and resumed his work. She watched every motion of
+his hand with eager eyes. Once she moved as if to close the window, but
+he shook his head, and again wiped the sweat from his brow.
+
+He had consulted the paper, and attacked his task with fresh energy for
+the third or fourth time, when his eyes happened to rest upon the window
+full of scrutinizing faces. His lips moved in some sudden exclamation,
+and then he shut the window with vehemence, and drew the curtain which
+obscured the lower half of it.
+
+"Not a very kind reception of your theory, so far," said Marcus.
+
+"Prejudice--nothing more," said Overtop. "When they see that we have no
+wish to pry into their private affairs, but are animated with a
+neighborly regard for them, they will not repel our advances. It isn't
+human nature."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+QIGG.
+
+During the following two weeks, up to New Year's day, the three friends
+made little progress in their observations. The tall girl in the immense
+skirts appeared rarely to reward Matthew Maltboy's ardent gaze, and even
+then seemed to look down at the dingy snow beneath, or the clouds
+overhead, or to something or somebody across the way, but never to the
+fluttering Maltboy.
+
+Nothing more was seen of the pale and grayhaired workman; for he kept
+the lower curtain of his window jealously drawn. But at night his
+shadow, strongly projected on the curtain, was in incessant motion; and
+far into the morning hours a gigantic head and arms shifted and blended
+upon it in grotesque forms. At the other window of the workman's
+apartment the young girl often sat, book in hand, and moved her lips as
+if she were reading aloud. Her eyes were never seen to wander to the
+outer world with those longings for freedom and fresh air which are
+natural to the youthful heart, but were always fixed upon the book, or
+upon some object within the room. She was entirely unconscious of the
+distant and imperfect scrutiny to which her form and movements were
+subjected by Marcus Wilkeson, who had begun to take a strange interest
+in her, and in the shadow on the curtain, since the healthy and amiable
+old gentleman directly opposite had ceased to smoke his pipe and indulge
+in his tranquil meditation daily.
+
+Twice only had he shown himself, and then, after a grave bow to Marcus
+Wilkeson, who returned it with more than the usual inclination of head,
+the old gentleman had taken a few whiffs at his pipe, looked out of the
+window with a troubled air, and vanished from the sight of his
+sympathizing observer, as if the quiet old sitting place had lost its
+charm for him. The young man--the disturbing element of the old
+gentleman's life, as Marcus Wilkeson regarded him--was not again seen
+in the room where he had made his first appearance, but was discovered,
+several days after that event, sitting at a table near a window in the
+second story, and writing industriously. His labors were evidently not
+disagreeable; for, after an hour's engagement with his pen, he would sit
+back in his chair, laugh, take a long drink from a black bottle which
+stood at his elbow, and light a fresh cigar. Whatever his occupation, he
+was completely absorbed in it, and did not notice the pair of keen eyes
+peering at him from behind a book in the house opposite. Every
+afternoon, about three o'clock, the young man sat at the table with his
+bottle, cigars, and writing materials, and pursued his pleasant labors.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson would never have pretended that it was not highly
+improper to watch one's neighbors. He would have denounced it as
+deserving of the severest reprobation. But he would have said, that if,
+while he was sitting, according to his invariable custom, at his own
+window, for the sole purpose of reading a book, people chose to bring
+themselves within the range of his vision, he was not therefore under
+obligations to vacate his seat. He would have insisted that any glances
+which he might have directed at his neighbors, were so levelled in fits
+of mental abstraction, or in the exercise of a friendly regard for them.
+The Overtop theory he discarded as fallacious, and likely to get its
+talented founder into trouble.
+
+That founder and his only follower, Maltboy, were determined, however,
+to put the new social system into practice on New Year's day, and had
+secured the ready services of Quigg, the grocer, as originally proposed
+by the sagacious Overtop. Marcus Wilkeson obstinately refused to
+participate in this projected grand tour; which refusal was too bad,
+said Overtop, because the fourth seat in the double sleigh that had been
+hired for the occasion would be left vacant.
+
+At last came New Year's day; and the sky was cloudless, and the sun was
+bright, and the weather was just cold enough to make the blood tingle
+pleasantly, and the snow was a foot deep, and well beaten down in the
+side streets. The elements themselves had conspired to give the Overtop
+theory every chance of success.
+
+J.M. Quigg, grocer, was elaborately attiring himself in the snug
+sleeping room behind his store, at ten o'clock on the morning of the
+eventful day. He little knew the tremendous importance of the part which
+he was about to perform. He looked upon Overtop and Maltboy, not as the
+expounders of a new social philosophy, but as cash customers to a
+considerable extent, and as partners in defraying the heavy expenses of
+a large double team. Mr. Quigg exercised the virtue of prudence even in
+his dissipations, and derived pleasure from the reflection that he would
+make his annual round of complimentary calls in an elegant turnout at a
+moderate cost.
+
+Therefore Mr. Quigg hummed pleasantly as he dressed himself, by the aid
+of a large mirror which he had taken for a bad debt, and which was the
+only ornament of the plainly furnished little room. Mr. Quigg was a man
+of business, and never fretted with cravats, nor made himself unhappy on
+the subject of hair. Three turns and a pull adjusted the former; and a
+half dozen well-directed dabs with a stiff brush regulated the latter.
+Fifteen minutes after he began his toilet, he took a comprehensive view
+of himself in the large mirror, and mentally expressed the conviction
+that, for a man of thirty-seven, he was not bad looking.
+
+Quigg was right; and his just opinion of himself was shared by the young
+widows and unmarried ladies of his acquaintance. He was about six feet
+high, with a graceful figure, and the head of a statesman. A more
+intellectual face, and a broader or more massive brow, assisted,
+perhaps, in its general effect, by a slight baldness, were rarely if
+ever seen. A distinguished professor of phrenology had picked out
+Quigg's head from among half an acre of heads at a lecture upon that
+subject in the city, and had pronounced it the "model head," greatly to
+the disgust of all the other large-skulled men in the hall. The
+professor had also assured Quigg, upon learning who and what he was,
+that it was a solemn duty he owed to society to abandon the grocery
+business, and devote himself to "philosophical culture, the development
+of the humanities, and the true expansion of his interior
+individuality." Notwithstanding this flattering opinion, Quigg still
+sanded his sugar, and reduced his whiskey, and found his delight as well
+as his-profit in those gross material pursuits.
+
+The interior Quigg, of whom the professor had spoken so hopefully, was
+still undeveloped. The professor's views of Quigg's head had, however,
+made a deep impression upon the owner of it, and had given to Quigg's
+ordinary observations on the weather, the state of his health, and the
+other familiar topics to which his remarks were principally addressed,
+an oracular importance in his own opinion. Such were the deceptive
+effects produced by his large, polished brow, and slow, imposing speech,
+that he always seemed to be on the point of uttering vital truths. But
+the listener's ear ached in vain for them.
+
+Quigg put on his overcoat, took a small glass of bitters from a bottle
+kept behind the large mirror, locked up the store, proceeded to the
+nearest restaurant, hastily despatched a lean, unsatisfactory chop and a
+cup of weak tea, gave a half dime to the waiter who bade him, in a loud
+and significant voice, "Happy New Year, sir," and then returning found
+the double sleigh punctual to appointment.
+
+It was a swan-shaped vehicle, brightly painted, thickly covered with
+buffalo robes, and drawn by two high-stepping horses, which tossed their
+heads and shook their bells merrily as if they shared in the prevailing
+jovialty of the day.
+
+On the front seat, and nearly filling up the whole width of the sleigh,
+sat the driver. His shoulders were broad enough for two men; his legs
+and arms were of twice the common size, and he had two well-defined
+chins. He seemed to be double in all his dimensions, like the sleigh.
+
+"Hallo, Quigg!" said the driver, in a voice of double strength, snapping
+his whip playfully at that gentleman as he approached.
+
+"Hallo to _you_, Cap," returned Quigg, pleasantly. "It is a very fine
+day. I guess there will be a great many calls made." Quigg uttered these
+words slowly, as if they were precious, and he hated to part with them.
+
+"Shouldn't wonder," answered Cap, which was a short name for Captain
+(nobody knew of what), and added, without any apparent sequence of
+ideas: "I s'pose you're goin' to take some brandy along, old fellow?
+It's hardly fair for me to be sittin' into the cold outside, with
+nothin' to drink, while you chaps are drinkin' your champagne punch
+before a warm fire."
+
+Mr. Quigg reflected a moment, as one who reckons up profit and loss. He
+then said:
+
+"A good idea, Cap. Brandy is not a bad thing on a cold day." He spoke
+with impressive solemnity.
+
+"Or any other day," added the driver. "Partickley 'lection day.
+Leastways, such was the 'pinion of the voters into my ward, last
+December, when I run for School Inspector, you know. Unfortunately, I
+didn't know the ropes then; and thought, when I got the nomination, I
+was sure to be 'lected. My 'ponent issued tickets for free drinks at all
+the rum mills into the ward. I didn't find out his game till about two
+o'clock in the afternoon, and then I tried it myself. But I was too
+late. He had six hours' start of me, and beat me by five hundred
+drinks--I mean votes."
+
+Mr. Quigg nodded, and said, "Of course," as if he had often heard of
+such instances, and there was nothing surprising in them. He then
+abruptly cut off the Captain's political reminiscences, by unlocking the
+store and entering it. After a few minutes' absence, he returned with a
+half-gallon jug and a tin dipper.
+
+"A nice, fat little feller," rapturously exclaimed Captain Tonkins,
+taking the proffered jug. Placing it in the bottom of the sleigh, where
+such of the public as were stirring in that vicinity could not see the
+operation, he half filled the tin dipper, and, raising it suddenly to
+his mouth, drank the contents with a double gulp. "Prime stuff, that,"
+said the Captain, smacking his lips. "A hogshead of it would make a
+school commissioner, an alderman, mebbe a major of you, Quigg."
+
+"I dare say," said Quigg. "But what would a dull, practical fellow like
+me be good for in public life?" This was Quigg's habitual way of
+depreciating himself, and it always impressed the hearer with a sense of
+Quigg's eminent ability.
+
+Quigg then drew a pair of yellow gloves on his large, hairy hands,
+slightly ripping the two thumbs and most of the fingers in the
+operation, took a seat in the double sleigh, and proclaimed himself
+ready to start.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+PLEASURE AS BUSINESS.
+
+Captain Tonkins cracked his whip with professional sonority over the
+heads of his lively horses, and they started off at a slapping pace,
+which brought them to the house of the three friends before the bells
+had fairly begun to jingle in unison. The door was instantly opened, and
+Overtop and Maltboy presented themselves, dressed in the most elaborate
+and captivating style. Marcus Wilkeson appeared just behind them, in his
+dressing gown and slippers, calmly smoking his well-browned Meerschaum.
+
+After the salutations of the day, both Overtop and Maltboy addressed a
+last appeal to Marcus to give up his ridiculous prejudices, and join the
+party; but he obstinately refused, saying that he should make only one
+call, and that was upon the old gentleman over the way.
+
+The arrangements for the day had already been made. The party were to
+call on a few dozen of Quigg's customers (selected from a carefully
+prepared list of one hundred) within range of a mile or two; also on a
+few friends of Overtop and Maltboy, who could not well be slighted, and
+then come back to the block.
+
+Quigg looked upon the day as one of business, and not of pleasure, and
+had methodized a system of callmaking, which was submitted to his
+companions, and highly approved by them. The order of exercises was as
+follows: First, a jerk at the doorbell; second, precipitate entrance,
+hat in hand; third, "Happy New Year," remark on fine weather, and
+introduction of friends; fourth, a second remark on fine weather, or any
+other one remark which might occur to friends on inspiration of moment;
+fifth, acceptance of one sip of wine, and one bite of cake, if any
+offered, with compliments on excellence of both; sixth, reference to
+list in hand, observation on the necessity of retiring, and regret for
+the same; seventh, precipitate retreat.
+
+The system did not work smoothly at first, in consequence of Overtop's
+and Maltboy's strained, excessive efforts to make themselves agreeable.
+It happened that, at the first two or three houses visited, Maltboy
+discovered charming young ladies, and could not resist the temptation to
+linger beyond the prescribed minutes, and talk trifles to them. It also
+fell out, that Overtop found a number of those sensible women for whom
+his heart ever longed, and whose starving souls, as he called them, were
+not to be satisfied with the dry crust of ordinary compliment. To them,
+therefore, he addressed observations on the inner or spiritual
+significance of the New Year's call; on the reminiscences of childhood
+suggested by sleigh bells; on the typical meaning of snow as the shroud
+of death, and, at the same time, the warming garment of coming life; on
+wine or lemonade (as the case might be), as an emblem of hospitality;
+and on many other little things as expressive of the loftiest truths.
+
+It was only after earnest remonstrances from Quigg, that the discursive
+Overtop brought himself down to the rules of the day. In deference to
+Quigg, Mr. Maltboy also steeled his too susceptible heart against the
+attractions which he was perpetually encountering, and kept strictly to
+the weather. He, as well as Overtop, was surprised to find that the
+single stereotyped observation, "It's a fine day," was, after all, more
+acceptable than a longer and more strikingly original remark for it
+imposed no tax upon the conversational resources of the ladies, and left
+them unfatigued to succeeding scores of visitors.
+
+About this time, it was observed of Captain Tonkins that he began to
+show signs of fatigue, rocking heavily in his seat with every
+oscillation of the sleigh, and talking thick like a jaded man. These
+phenomena seeming to require some explanation, the Captain stated that
+he had been up late the past three nights, and could keep himself awake
+only by taking occasional draughts of Quigg's brandy. The Captain then
+proceeded to indulge in random recollections of his political career,
+and withering denunciations of one Larry Mulcahy, his successful rival
+for the office of School Inspector, whom the Captain did not hesitate to
+brand as a jailbird.
+
+When the party returned to the block where the Overtop theory was to be
+tested, Mr. Quigg's services were found invaluable. He had not only been
+the principal grocer in the vicinity for five years, but he had served
+on Ward Committees for the relief of the poor at other people's expense,
+and had participated largely in those admirable institutions for the
+promotion of matrimony known as Sociables. Therefore, Quigg knew about
+everybody on the block worth knowing. There were a few persons in that
+old house near the corner, who sent in for herrings, cheap butter, and
+pounds of flour, and whom, of course, he did not know. There was a queer
+old Dutchman in that square, old-fashioned house in the middle of the
+block, whom neither he nor anybody else knew.
+
+They went through half of the south side of the block, and found only
+plain and commonplace people. Overtop and Maltboy began to be weary. The
+former was gradually discovering that his theory was a bore. The latter
+wondered whether Quigg knew the tall girl, concerning the identity of
+the front part of whose residence Maltboy was at fault, although he knew
+every brick of the rear.
+
+"In this 'ere house," said Quigg, "I shall be treated rudely, because
+they owe me fifty dollars for groceries. It's a curious fact, but I have
+noticed that debtors always act kind o' cold to creditors, as if it was
+the creditors that owed the money."
+
+Mr. Quigg spoke with an important air, as if he had made an original
+discovery in human nature.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+SOMETHING HIDDEN.
+
+While this exploring party were going through the block, Mr. Marcus
+Wilkeson dressed himself with more than usual care, preparatory to a
+call upon the unknown old gentleman over the way, who that very morning
+had appeared at his window, the first time in three days, and tendered
+the compliments of the season in two low bows and a smile. Having
+carefully adjusted his necktie, and smoothed the creases of his gloves,
+Mr. Wilkeson grasped his old friend, a hickory cane, by its sturdy
+elbow, and marched forth to make his solitary visit.
+
+As 'he turned the corner of the street upon which the unknown old
+gentleman's residence was situated, thinking of the oddity of the call
+he was about to make, and half inclined to abandon it, he saw, in a
+doorway a few yards in front of him, a little girl who bore a striking
+resemblance to the patient creature that he had often noticed sitting at
+a window in the room of the pale mechanic. A single glance at the
+cracked and dirty front of the building established its connection with
+the weather-stained and shaky rear premises in which the worker toiled
+at his strange task from morning to night, and far into the
+morning again.
+
+The little girl was earnestly talking with a rough, hungry-looking
+fellow in a greasy cap and tattered blue overalls. As Marcus approached,
+he heard the following fragment of conversation:
+
+"Yer can't fool this child again, now, I tell yer. Why don't he pay me?
+_that's_ what I want to know. I _will_ go up." The man stepped forward,
+as if to ascend the stairs.
+
+"Please don't, Mr. Gilsum," said the girl, in a sweet, pleading tone,
+laying a red and toilworn little hand softly on his arm. "Papa will pay
+you next week. He will, believe me, sir."
+
+"So you told me last week," growled Mr. Gilsum, "and the week before
+that. It's all humbug. Why don't he pay me now? _that's_ what I want to
+know." Again he put a foot forward, and was again restrained by the hand
+of the little girl.
+
+"I have tried very hard to earn money, Mr. Gilsum," said the musical and
+plaintive voice, _but_ have been disappointed. Next week I am sure I
+will have some for you."
+
+"Pshaw!" ejaculated the man, pulling the greasy cap over his eyes in a
+spirit of savage determination. "I can't waste time talking. I _will_
+find out why he don't pay me now."
+
+The inexorable Mr. Gilsum pushed aside the feeble hand of the little
+girl, and was about to go up the stairs in good earnest, when Marcus
+Wilkeson, who had lingered near the door to catch the exact purport of
+the conversation, called out to him:
+
+"Hallo, my friend! what's the row?"
+
+Mr. Gilsum stopped, and, turning, said snappishly:
+
+"None of yer business. Unless," he prudently added, "yer a friend of the
+comical old chap up stairs, and want to pay his debts."
+
+"I am a friend, and I will pay them," rejoined Marcus, speaking from the
+impulse of the moment. Since he had become rich, and could afford the
+luxury, he frequently spoke and acted upon impulse, without regard to
+consequences.
+
+Mr. Gilsum's face suddenly changed from an aspect of moroseness to one
+of bewitching amiability. He stood in the doorway, and said:
+
+"It's only a matter of ten shillings, sir, for brass and screws, and
+little odds and ends from my shop--the locksmith's shop over in the next
+street--you may remember it, sir. I'm sure I don't want to be hard on
+the gentleman."
+
+To cut short explanations, which he hated, Marcus paid the locksmith his
+ten shillings, and suggested that he need not wait longer. The
+locksmith, having received the money, thought it incumbent upon him to
+apologize and explain still further, till Marcus took hold of the door,
+as if to close it, when he accepted the hint, and departed, mumbling an
+apology as he went.
+
+The young girl, who had looked on in amazement, turned a pair of soft
+blue eyes toward the face of the stranger, and said:
+
+"Papa will thank you very much, sir."
+
+Marcus now had an opportunity to observe her more closely. Her figure
+was slightly formed, and undersized for her apparent age of seventeen
+years. Her face would have been plain, but for one peculiarity which
+made it charming, in his practised judgment. This rare excellence was
+her complexion, which showed a perfect pink and white, without
+roughness, spot, or blemish, under the strong light of a noonday sun,
+made more dazzling by its reflection from the snow. Marcus had never
+seen but one such complexion, and that was many years ago. He looked at
+it in silent wonder, until the delicate bloom in the centre of her
+cheeks began to invade the neighboring white, and the large blue eyes
+drooped in confusion.
+
+"Pardon me, my child," said Marcus, in a gentle, reassuring voice.
+
+She looked up, much embarrassed, and said:
+
+"Will you be so good as to walk up and see my poor father, sir? He will
+be delighted to meet a friend, for he is very much in want of one, sir."
+
+"I do not know him, my child; but I should be happy to make his
+acquaintance."
+
+The girl was surprised to learn that her father's benefactor was a
+stranger to him, and looked doubtingly at him for a moment--but only a
+moment--and then ran briskly up the stairs, asking him to follow.
+
+The stairs were uncarpeted, and had little feet-worn hollows in the
+middle of them. The banisters were rickety, and had been notched by the
+knives of reckless tenants. The first and second floors were occupied by
+different families (so Marcus inferred from the distinct set of baby
+cries issuing from each), and the halls were dirty, and flavored with a
+decided odor of washing day. But on the third story he saw a clean,
+white floor, and drew breaths of pure air from an open rear window, and
+heard no noise save the dull sound of filing.
+
+The little girl paused a second at a door bearing the inscription,
+"Private," asked the visitor to please wait, and opened the door just
+wide enough to admit her body, and entered, nearly closing it behind
+her. In the one glance which Marcus then obtained of the interior of the
+room, he saw the pale mechanic hastily rise from a jumble of cog wheels
+before him, and put up a screen to shelter his work from observation,
+after which he stepped forward, or rather sprang, to meet his child.
+
+Mr. Wilkeson heard a few words of hurried conversation between the
+father and daughter, and then the door was thrown wide open, and the
+mechanic stood in full view. He was a man of medium height, of a spare
+build, and attired in faded, seedy black. His head seemed altogether too
+large for his body; and his almost livid complexion, hollow cheeks, and
+gleaming eyes, told a story of constant and consuming thought. The
+strange, fixed glitter of his eyes was unpleasant to behold. Marcus had
+noticed the same thing in insane persons.
+
+"My name is Minford," said the mechanic, in a deep and solemn voice,
+"and I thank you for saving me from the annoying visits of that
+impertinent fellow. I beg, sir, that you will give me your address, and
+assure you that the sum shall positively be repaid to you next week."
+
+"Never mind the repayment," said Marcus, kindly. "The sum was a trifle
+for me."
+
+The mechanic's eyes flashed with new fire, and his lower lip curved
+with pride, as he answered:
+
+"But I shall insist on returning it, sir. We are temporarily poor, sir;
+but we are not beggars yet, I trust that, some day, we shall be in a
+position to confer benefits, instead of receiving them."
+
+Marcus knew that the man was turning over in his mind the troublesome
+question of "MOTIVE," with which so many people like to make themselves
+unhappy; and he therefore said:
+
+"I took the liberty of assisting you, sir, because I am a neighbor of
+yours, living on the other side of the block, in a house which can be
+plainly seen from your window; and I think it is the duty of neighbors
+to be neighborly, on New Year's day at least. My name is Marcus
+Wilkeson."
+
+The mechanic's face assumed a pleasanter expression. "Perhaps," said he,
+"you are the gentleman that I have sometimes seen sitting with a book,
+in a window covered with grape vines?"
+
+"I am," returned Marcus.
+
+"As a scholar, then--as one who is superior to mean motives and vulgar
+curiosity--you are welcome to my poor home. Pray, walk in, sir. Pet,
+give the gentleman a chair."
+
+The girl, whose face had been clouded during the first part of this
+conversation, brightened up at its close, and obeyed her father with
+alacrity, brushing the clean chair with her handkerchief, to make it the
+more acceptable to their visitor. She also took his hat and cane, and
+placed them carefully away.
+
+The room was simply but neatly furnished, and very clean. The hand of
+taste and order was everywhere visible. Snow-white curtains festooned
+the two small windows, and concealed all of a turn-up bedstead but two
+of its legs. A small array of white crockery shone from an open closet;
+and a squat-looking stove, which made the apartment agreeably warm, was
+smartly polished, and was evaporating cheerful music out of a bright
+teakettle. Through a door partly ajar could be seen another room,
+covered with a rag carpet, and the companion of the first in simplicity
+and neatness.
+
+Marcus had not intended to look at the mechanic's corner, which was
+almost completely screened from view, being desirous to justify the high
+opinion which Mr. Minford had expressed of him; but his eyes were
+irresistibly attracted to the mysterious spot, and obtained a clearer
+glimpse, through an open space between the two screens, of a something
+composed of cogwheels, springs, bands, and levers. His host, observing
+this casual glance, much to the guest's mortification, rose, and placed
+the screens close together at right angles, thus shutting out a view of
+the corner.
+
+Mr. Minford opened his lips as if to offer some explanation of the act,
+but did not offer it. A moment afterward, he said:
+
+"I have not always been a poor man, Mr. Wilkeson. Six years ago I
+possessed a handsome fortune, which enabled me to pursue certain
+philosophical experiments, in which I had taken great interest, at
+leisure. An unfortunate speculation in real estate, year before last,
+nearly ruined me. I converted the remains of my property into cash, and
+went on with my experiments, undiscouraged. Like all laborers in the
+cause of science--which is the cause of humanity--I have met with many
+obstacles. Several times, when I have been on the point of perfecting my
+great invention, some small, unforeseen difficulty has occurred,
+compelling me to reconstruct large portions of the machinery. Eighteen
+months passed away, and I found myself penniless. I tried to borrow
+money, but without success. Now, who do you suppose has supported us the
+last three months?"
+
+"Some benevolent relative, perhaps," said Mr. Wilkeson, hazarding a wild
+guess.
+
+"You are right, sir. And a near and dear relative it is--no other than
+my little Pet here." Mr. Minford placed his right hand fondly on the
+shining head of the young girl, who sat on a low stool by his side,
+looking into his face.
+
+She blushed deeply, and said:
+
+"You forget the unknown good friend who sent the letters with money to
+you, papa."
+
+"No, no, I don't, Pet," continued Mr. Minford, patting her playfully on
+the cheeks; "but you were the dearest and sweetest of my guardian
+angels. You know you were, you rogue. Why, sir, you will hardly believe
+it, but this little creature, when she knew our money was nearly gone,
+taught herself the art of embroidery, with the aid of some illustrations
+from an old magazine, and in less than a fortnight could work so
+beautifully, that she was able to earn from three to four dollars a
+week. When she first told me that she was going out to look for work, I
+opposed it fiercely; but the obstinate little Pet would have her way.
+She was lucky enough to get a job from a milliner, and pleased her
+employer so well, that steady work was given to her, until last week,
+when the kind-hearted lady died, and now little Pet has nothing to do.
+Some people think, because she is young--"
+
+"Please don't talk about me any more, papa," said Pet, who had been
+blushing deeply, and looking very beautiful in the visitor's eyes. "You
+forget what the postman used to bring you every Saturday."
+
+"No, I don't, you little, troublesome, impertinent Pet. I was just about
+to speak of it, when you interrupted me. You must know, Mr. Wilkeson,
+that every Saturday the postman, on his first morning round, delivered
+to me a letter, marked 'New York City,' containing two dollars, without
+a word of writing inside, and addressed to me in large capitals, each
+nearly half an inch long. The object of this singular style of address
+was either to make it so plain that the postman could not mistake, or to
+disguise some handwriting which otherwise I might recognize. Now, as I
+have no relatives living, and no friends that I know of, who would lend
+me a dollar except on the best security, I am greatly puzzled, as you
+may suppose, to guess the name of my unknown benefactor. Generous man!
+For aught I know, he may now be dead, or himself reduced to poverty;
+for, last Saturday, the regular weekly remittance failed to come."
+
+"Then I see that I am just in season to help you," said Marcus Wilkeson,
+who, during the recital of this brief history, had decided upon his
+course of action.
+
+"I thank you most gratefully," returned Mr. Minford, "and fully
+appreciate the noble motives of your conduct. Your appearance convinces
+me that you are entirely disinterested. But I should feel ashamed to
+take money from you, without giving some security for its repayment. I
+shall therefore insist upon making over to you a certain interest in the
+invention, the most valuable of modern times, which lies almost finished
+behind those screens. Let me give you some idea of it, and you can then
+decide how much money you will advance, merely as a matter of business.
+I cannot consent to put our negotiations upon any other ground. The
+invention, then, is--" The speaker looked at the corner as he spoke,
+and paused.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson knew that the inventor was about to part with his secret
+unwillingly, and that he would regret it forever after. To save him from
+unpleasant feelings on that score, and to maintain friendly relations
+between them for the future, Marcus put a stop to the reluctant
+disclosure. He said:
+
+"Never mind it, Mr. Minford. I know nothing of mechanical matters, and
+take no interest in them. Your explanation would only be wasted on me.
+Besides, it is entirely uncalled for, as I am willing to take your own
+opinion of the invention, and will pay you five hundred dollars for a
+one-tenth interest in it, if those terms will suit." Marcus took a keen
+delight in acting upon this singular impulse, and was sorry he had not
+said a "thousand," when he saw the glow of happiness that irradiated the
+sweet face of Pet, still sitting on the stool by her father's side.
+
+[Illustration: THE BOY BOG]
+
+"Heaven bless you, sir!" said Mr. Minford. "You will be the means not
+only of relieving me and my dear child, but also of conferring the boon
+of a great discovery upon mankind. But your terms are too liberal,
+sir. I shall insist upon assigning one fifth of my right to you, which,
+mark my prediction, will prove of itself a fortune. Furthermore, I feel
+that I ought, if only to show my complete confidence in you, to tell you
+what it is. It is--" Mr. Minford hesitated for a word.
+
+"Now I beg, as a particular favor, that you won't tell me," said Marcus,
+goodhumoredly. "If you bore me with any of those dull details,
+I'll--I'll take back my offer. As to the proportion of the invention
+which I am to have, I will accept one fifth, since you insist on it, not
+because I want it, but that we may not say another word about
+the matter."
+
+"As you please, sir. But how shall I sufficiently thank you?"
+
+Marcus, who was already overcome with the gratitude which shone from the
+large, soft eyes of the young girl, answered, with a laugh and a blush
+(he had not outgrown the habit of reddening on occasions):
+
+"By changing the subject."
+
+Mr. Minford was about to protest against this extraordinary method of
+thanking a benefactor, when a rap was heard at the door.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+THE BOY BOG.
+
+In reply to the invitation, "Come in," a tall boy opened the door, and
+started back on seeing a stranger.
+
+"Do come in, Bog," said Mr. Minford. "I have good news to tell you. This
+is a friend of ours, Mr. Wilkeson. What with his running of errands, and
+doing little jobs for us, we really couldn't get along without him. Oh,
+walk in, Bog; you're always welcome here."
+
+"Now _do_ come in, Bog," added the little girl, in a winning tone,
+rising from her stool, stepping to the door, and placing a hand on
+his shoulder.
+
+The new comer, after a few shuffles on the threshold, and an
+unintelligible murmur of words, walked in with painful awkwardness, and
+took a seat upon a corner of the chair which Pet offered him, as if the
+whole chair were more of a favor than he could conscientiously accept;
+He was a bony, strongly built stripling, with a record of anywhere from
+seventeen to nineteen years written in his red, resolute, honest face.
+He wore a coarse but neat suit of boy's clothes, one inch too small in
+every dimension, a white turn-down collar, and a black neckerchief
+fastidiously tied; and carried a slouched cloth cap in his hand, with
+which he slapped his knees alternately, after he had taken a seat, and
+continued to do so without cessation.
+
+"Well, Bog," said Mr. Minford, kindly, but condescendingly, "you are
+just in time to hear good news. This gentleman has taken a partnership
+in my invention (Mr. Minford thought it best to state the case that
+way), and, with his assistance, I shall be able to complete it and bring
+it before the public immediately."
+
+"Glad to hear it, sir," answered the boy Bog, blushing hard, lifting his
+eyes from the floor long enough to glance at Mr. Minford and his
+daughter, and all the while slapping his knees vigorously.
+
+"He is in the bill-posting business," said Mr. Minford to Marcus. "You
+may have seen him at the head of his company of walking advertisers.
+Ha! ha!"
+
+Marcus remembered having seen that honest face, that thick head of hair,
+and that identical cap, sticking out of the top of a portable wooden
+frame covered with placards, setting forth the virtues of quack
+medicines, the excellencies of dry goods, or the unequalled attractions
+of concert saloons. He also remembered that this wooden frame was much
+taller than any of the long procession of frames which followed it, and
+that, from a hole in the right side thereof, protruded a fist about the
+size of the boy Bog's, clutching a broomstick, with which the inmate
+kept a semblance of order among the wilful and eccentric occupants of
+the frames behind him. "Oh, yes; I have seen you very often, Bog. How
+do you like the business?" said Marcus, pleasantly.
+
+"Very well, sir, thank you," replied Bog, with his eyes still on the
+floor, "'cept when the boys poke fun at us; 'cos we can't run after 'em
+in them boxes, and wollop 'em. 'S rather hard, that." Bog caught Miss
+Minford's eye as he concluded these remarks, and blushed till he
+perspired, to think that he should have dropped such a brutal
+observation in presence of that young lady.
+
+Mr. Minford noticed the confusion of his young friend, and
+unintentionally added to it, by saying:
+
+"Bog is a good boy. By his industry, he earns eight or ten dollars a
+week, not only supporting himself, but his aunt."
+
+"Not this week, nor last week neither, Mr. Minford," said Bog, mopping
+the modest sweat from his brow with the sleeve of his coat. "The
+adv'tisin' line a'n't as good as't used to be. I only got three jobs
+with my company the last fortnight, and nary cent of pay from any of
+'em. Of course, all my boys had to be paid just the same."
+
+"And you paid them?" asked Marcus.
+
+"Certainly," said Bog.
+
+"Then be good enough to accept five dollars from me, as a reward for
+your honesty," said Marcus, acting upon another of his impulses.
+
+"No, thank you, sir. No, thank you," returned Bog, quickly, to prevent
+Marcus from pulling the money out of his pocket. "I sha'n't take it,
+sir; I won't have it anyway. I'm goin' into the reg'lar bill-postin'
+business, as Jack Fink's assistant, to-morrow, and can earn all I want."
+Bog blushed, but this time with honest pride, though he was flustered to
+look up and see that Miss Minford nodded in approval of his
+independent spirit.
+
+Bog then slapped each knee about a dozen times with his cap, and
+betrayed many symptoms of fever heat and great mental distress. After
+which, he said that he had only called to see if he could do
+anything for them.
+
+"Now do you mean to tell us that it is not a regular New Year's call,"
+said Mr. Minford, playfully, "and that you have not a dozen more
+to make?"
+
+Bog looked guilty of an enormous fraud, dropped his cap, in his
+confusion, twice, murmured something inaudible, rose to his feet, and
+backed out of the room, making one comprehensive bow to everybody, and
+saying "Good-night" before it was two P.M.
+
+As Bog shut the door, everybody laughed, but not so loud as to be heard
+by the boy; and, under the cover of the general good humor, Marcus rose,
+and said that he must go. He was afraid he had made his visit too long
+for a first one. He would call again on the following day, if agreeable,
+and complete the proposed arrangement. In conclusion, he placed his card
+in Mr. Minford's hand, with the names of a few references pencilled on
+the margin.
+
+Mr. Minford was very sorry that their pleasant acquaintance should take
+his leave so abruptly, and hoped that they would enjoy many visits from
+him, not merely as a business partner (Mr. Minford laid emphasis on
+this), but as a friend.
+
+Pet repeated her father's regrets and hopes in the more impressive
+language of her sweet eyes, and, for the twentieth time that day,
+conjured up, in the memory of Marcus Wilkeson, a vague reminiscence of
+the distant past.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII.
+
+MALTBOY'S TWENTIETH AFFAIR.
+
+The house which had elicited Quigg's last sagacious remark, was a
+three-story brownstone front, and was one of the finest looking on the
+south side. The heavy mahogany door was opened by a slovenly girl, who
+ushered the callers into the front parlor, which was carefully darkened,
+according to the custom of the day. The only objects plainly visible
+were two female figures, each seated near a front window, under the
+rosy shade of damask curtains artfully disposed. One of the ladies, whom
+Matthew Maltboy was not slow to recognize, looked like a fountain of
+pink silk, gushing out with great vehemence in high, curving jets on
+every side; from which fountain a slim, graceful figure had risen, as
+far as the waist, like a modern Arethusa. The gleam of a shapely neck,
+of a pearl necklace and diamond cross, of diamond earrings, of an
+enormous gold brooch, of golden gyves an inch broad on each wrist, as
+the rose-tinted rays fell on those natural and artificial charms,
+produced a dazzling effect in the shady corner. On plainer persons, this
+display might have seemed, in Maltboy's eyes, a glaring instance of bad
+taste. But, looking at that small, oval face, those large, flashing
+black eyes, complexion of red and white, so beautifully blended that it
+hardly seemed a work of nature, pouting lips, even, white teeth, and
+heavily braided hair, Maltboy thought that no decorations could be-too
+gaudy for a creature of such radiant loveliness.
+
+At the same instant (as their feet passed the parlor threshold) that
+Maltboy made these comprehensive observations, the quick eyes of Fayette
+Overtop were scanning the lady that basked in the subdued light of the
+other window. She rose from a smaller fountain of silk to a less height
+than her companion. She was fat to such a degree, that the bodice of her
+dress seemed ready to burst with the excessive pressure beneath,
+immediately suggesting to every beholder the obvious humanity of
+enlarging it, by taking only a small portion from the superfluous silk
+below. She was quite pretty, and very healthy, and had a smile lurking
+on her lips, and in the corners of her small blue eyes, and in the
+dimples of her round, red cheeks, and in the curved crease which was
+beginning to show under her apple of a chin. She wore plain colors, and
+exhibited no ornaments save a large brooch with braided hair in it. The
+lean Overtop immediately felt a tender inclination toward this fat
+young lady.
+
+Mr. Quigg paid the compliments of the season in his neat, settled
+style, to Miss Whedell--the tall young lady--who received them with
+marked coldness, and then begged leave to introduce Messrs. Overtop and
+Maltboy, to whom she smiled graciously, rising slightly from her chair,
+and sinking back again, without disturbing the symmetrical flow of the
+silken fountain. With a wave of her jewelled right hand she performed
+the ceremony of introduction between the three callers and Mrs.
+Frump--the fat young lady--who also carefully raised herself about two
+inches from her chair, and lowered herself again, without disarranging
+a ripple.
+
+In compliance with an invitation from Miss Whedell, the three callers
+sat down. Mr. Maltboy gravitated by a natural instinct to the side of
+his charmer. Mr. Overtop was drawn by an irresistible impulse into the
+vicinity of Mrs. Frump, having detected in her general appearance
+certain indications of what he called "a sensible woman." Mr. Quigg,
+feeling that he was one too many, took a "seat equally removed from the
+two ladies, and commenced playing soft tunes on his hat, and looking
+vacantly about the room.
+
+"I had begun to wonder, Mr. Maltboy," said Miss Whedell, "what makes our
+friends so backward to-day. I do declare, we have not had a caller for
+more than--how long is it, Gusty, since Colonel Bigford dropped in?"
+
+Maltboy thought her voice had a sweet, metallic ring.
+
+"About half an hour," replied Mrs. Frump, after a brief mental
+calculation.
+
+"Why, Gusty!" exclaimed Miss Whedell; "how can you sit there and tell
+such stories? You know it is not five minutes."
+
+"Just as you please, dear," said Mrs. Frump, leaving on the minds of her
+hearers the impression that her estimate was the correct one.
+
+"I never saw anything so slow," pursued Miss Whedell. "Would you believe
+it, Mr. Maltboy--here are two hours gone, and we have not had more
+than--how many callers have we had, Gusty? You keep account of them."
+
+Mrs. Frump drew out a little memorandum book from one of her pockets,
+and consulted. "Exactly eleven, Clemmy," said she.
+
+"Gusty Frump," returned Miss Whedell, with some warmth, "you ought to be
+ashamed of yourself! We have had fifty callers, to my certain
+knowledge."
+
+"I presume you are right," said Mrs. Frump, with a smile that irradiated
+the whole of her fat face, and again imparted the idea that Miss Whedell
+was wrong.
+
+"For one," said Matthew Maltboy, improving the opportunity to put in a
+word, "I should not be surprised to learn that you had a hundred."
+
+Miss Whedell appreciated the delicate compliment, and beamed fascination
+upon him.
+
+"It has been a horrid, dreary winter, has it not, Mr. Maltboy?" said
+she, in a tone that invited sympathy and confidence.
+
+Mr. Maltboy, supposing that she alluded to the prevalent snow and ice of
+the season, said that it certainly had.
+
+"No balls, no opera--or none to speak of--no parties, no anything. You
+will hardly believe it, Mr. Maltboy, but I declare I haven't been to
+twenty parties this winter--have I, Gusty?"
+
+"To only two that I know of," responded Mrs. Frump, in a winning voice.
+
+"You provoking creature," said Miss Whedell, "to talk so, when you know
+that I have been to at least eighteen parties!" Miss Whedell scowled
+charmingly as she spoke, and then added, with a pleasant smile, for the
+benefit of Mr. Maltboy: "She's a gay young widow; and you know what
+widows are."
+
+Mr. Maltboy's knowledge of that species of the human family was
+extensive and exact. He nodded, to signify that he knew something of
+them, and felt forearmed, from that moment, against the charms of
+Mrs. Frump.
+
+Mrs. Frump told Miss Whedell that she thanked her very much for the
+compliment, and laughed so prettily, that Fayette Overtop determined to
+apply some of his grand tests for the discovery of sensible women.
+
+Abandoning the vein of commonplace conversation which he had worked
+during the five minutes since his arrival, he remarked:
+
+"It really makes us feel young again--does it not, Mrs. Frump?--to renew
+this charming custom of receiving and making calls."
+
+Mr. Overtop spoke in general terms, like a philosopher; whereas Mrs.
+Frump made a personal application of the remark to herself, and replied,
+rather coldly: "I have no doubt that it makes _old_ persons feel
+younger," and then she looked at Matthew Maltboy, and seemed to be
+listening to the conversation between him and Miss Whedell.
+
+Mr. Overtop paused a moment, and tried again: "Is it not pleasant,
+though sad, Mrs. Frump, to think of the friends whom we knew many, many
+years ago, who no longer live to greet us on this festal day?" The
+speaker alluded to mankind at large.
+
+Mrs. Frump responded tartly, that she could not speak from experience,
+of course, but she presumed that Mr. Overtop's opinion was correct. And
+again she glanced at Maltboy.
+
+Mr. Overtop briefly rested, and then remarked:
+
+"It may be merely a poetical conceit of mine, but it seems to me that
+the horses prance higher, and shake their bells more merrily on New
+Year's than any other day, as if they partook in our enjoyment of the
+occasion. May not the horse, by some mysterious instinct, know that it
+is the beginning of the year?"
+
+Mrs. Frump smiled, and answered: "Not being a horse, of course I can't
+say. But I would suggest, whether ostlers do not give their animals an
+extra quantity of oats on New Year's day, to make their action
+more stylish?"
+
+Mr. Overtop marked a quizzical expression in the widow's left eye, and
+was disgusted.
+
+For the third time she looked intently at Matthew Maltboy, who was
+putting in a few words with great animation; and then turned her face
+toward Mr. Quigg, who was taking his third mental inventory of the
+furniture, and executing "Hail Columbia," with variations, on his hat.
+
+"It's a finer New Year's day than the last one, is it not, Mr. Quigg?"
+
+Mr. Quigg, who had an astonishing memory for dates and conditions of the
+weather, replied, after a second's reflection:
+
+"It is a much finer day, Mrs. Frump. It rained last New Year's. Perhaps
+you may remember my leaving an umbrella at the house where you were then
+stopping, in Sixteenth street, and my calling for it again, on which
+occasion you said I reminded you of Paul Pry, in the play, who was
+always forgetting his umbrella."
+
+The widow laughed, and said that she distinctly remembered the
+circumstances.
+
+Mr. Quigg, thus encouraged, went on:
+
+"New Year's days differ very much. The one before the last was very
+snowy in the forenoon, with hail in the afternoon; and the one before
+that was so mild, that I found an overcoat really uncomfortable. The
+one before--"
+
+"Excuse me for the interruption," said Mrs. Frump, suddenly, "but I
+can't help saying how much Mr. Maltboy looks like Dr. Warts. Doesn't
+he, Clemmy?"
+
+"Like Dr. Warts!" exclaimed Miss Whedell. "Who's he?"
+
+"Why, don't you remember, Clemmy, the doctor that you consulted about
+your hair?" The widow looked the picture of guilelessness as she asked
+the question.
+
+Miss Whedell turned slightly red in parts of her face that were not red
+before, and involuntarily raised her hands to two heavy braids of hair
+which fronted each ear, and adjusted them. Then she said, sarcastically:
+
+"Mr. Maltboy must feel much flattered at being compared with a notorious
+quack."
+
+Mrs. Frump, with a laugh spreading all over her gentle face, replied:
+
+"Oh! of course you call him a quack, because he could not save your--"
+
+"You are rude, madam," said Miss Whedell, with emotion.
+
+"And you are silly, miss," retorted Mrs. Frump, still smiling, "to take
+offence at nothing."
+
+"You ought to be ashamed of yourself, madam."
+
+Greatly to the relief of the three callers, who were seized with a
+desire to laugh aloud during this short, snapping dialogue, a bell rang,
+and a new figure entered upon the scene. The two ladies rose about three
+inches, and greeted him as Mr. Chiffield. Mr. Chiffield bowed stiffly,
+smiled mechanically, and cast a sweeping glance at the three men
+present. This glance, and the looks with which it was met, called up a
+singular train of associations.
+
+Maltboy remembered the new comer as a fellow who had trod on his corns
+getting into an Amity street stage. Overtop remembered him as an
+eccentric individual, who always carried, without the slightest
+reference to existing weather, an umbrella under his arm, with the point
+rearward, and held at just the angle to pierce the eye of a person
+walking incautiously after him. Overtop had frequently felt a strong
+inclination to pull the umbrella out from behind, and ask the bearer to
+carry it in a less threatening manner.
+
+Mr. Chiffield, on the other hand, readily recalled Matthew Maltboy as a
+suspicious person whom he had seen hanging around an up-town hotel,
+about a year and a half before (when Maltboy was paying his ineffectual
+addresses to a cruel Cuban beauty who passed the summer months at that
+house). Mr. Chiffield had always supposed him to be a confidence man of
+superior abilities.
+
+Of Overtop, Mr. Chiffield was vaguely reminiscent. Unless he was
+mistaken, that person was the one who wore an entire suit of pepper and
+salt, including a felt hat, necktie, and gaiters, two summers before.
+
+Mr. Quigg was a novelty in Mr. Chiffield's eyes; but Mr. Chiffield was
+well known by sight to Mr. Quigg, who also remembered to have heard that
+he was a partner in the great drygoods house of Upjack, Chiffield & Co.
+
+Mr. Chiffield was about forty years of age, and had a bald head, a
+square, heavy face, scanty whiskers, small, shrewd eyes, and a bilious
+complexion. He dressed in profound black, wore his necktie negligently,
+exhibited neither ring nor breastpin nor gold chain, spoke as if he were
+always thinking inwardly of his private business, and never laughed.
+These peculiarities indicated, beyond any doubt, that Mr. Chiffield was
+a wealthy man; though it might be difficult to trace the exact processes
+of reasoning by which this conclusion was reached. Any unprejudiced
+stranger, seeing Mr. Chiffield, and being told that he was a partner in
+a large drygoods house, would instantly think, "That drygoods house will
+stand in the midst of fires, earthquakes, and financial revulsions."
+
+With that fine instinct peculiar to lovers, Matthew Maltboy immediately
+recognized in Mr. Chiffield a rival--and a dangerous one. Having seen
+much of society, Maltboy was well aware that Mr. Chiffield's mature age,
+his grim appearance, his sparse whiskers, and even the bald spot on the
+top of his head, were eminent advantages with which youth and bloom, and
+a full head of hair could not cope--unless with the aid of that
+fascination which Matthew flattered himself that he possessed, and
+which, he thought, he had used to some purpose during his hurried
+conversation with his twentieth enslaver, Miss Whedell. The usages of
+New Year's day, as well as frequent impatient nods from Quigg, and
+suggestive coughs from Overtop, would not permit of his staying longer.
+He therefore, rose to take his leave, his fellow pilgrims doing
+likewise, when Miss Whedell remarked that they were in a great hurry,
+and regretted that they could not remain a few minutes more.
+
+The captivated Maltboy toyed, with his hat in an uncertain way, and was
+half disposed to sit down again, when Quigg hastily produced his
+visiting list, and said, with his best business smile:
+
+"We Should certainly be very happy, Miss Whedell; but we have
+seventy-five calls still to make, and it is now (consulting his watch)
+two o'clock."'
+
+As the three visitors withdrew (declining, at every step, a pressing
+invitation to taste the refreshments which were piled in mountainous
+form on a table in an adjoining alcove), Maltboy exchanged a look of
+deep, sentimental meaning with Miss Whedell, who rose at least six
+inches from her chair, and followed it with a slight hostile glare at
+Mr. Chiffield, upon whose equable face it fell harmless. Overtop bowed
+coldly to everybody, as if he were disappointed in the human species;
+and Quigg gave a parting grin at the room in general, and at nobody or
+nothing in particular,
+
+"We're all right, Top," whispered Maltboy, as they descended the steps
+to the sidewalk. "She smiled slightly when I mentioned having seen her
+from our back parlor window. I have obtained permission to call again."
+
+"You'll have to do it without me, my dear fellow," returned Overtop,
+tossing back his head from force of habit, the offensive cowlick being
+then suppressed by his hat. "Nothing on earth could induce me to speak
+to that dull widow again."
+
+"She doesn't live there," said Quigg. "She is some connection, I
+believe, of the queer old Dutchman that I spoke of, and is probably only
+helping Miss Whedell to receive callers. I should think, from the way
+they abuse each other, that they were old and dear friends."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX.
+
+MRS. SLAPMAN AT HOME.
+
+Full of new and pleasant thoughts, Marcus Wilkeson walked on toward the
+half-antique house which contained the strange old gentleman. Just as he
+was about to swing back the iron gate of the front yard, he saw, at a
+distance, the two friends of his bosom and Mr. Quigg descending a flight
+of steps to the sidewalk. They saw him at the same time; and both
+Overtop and Maltboy violently beckoned him to approach. Mr. Quigg added
+his solicitations in a calmer and more dignified manner, moving his arm
+like an automaton three times from the elbow. Even the driver, Captain
+Tonkins, in the spirit of invitation peculiar to his mental state,
+steadied himself on the seat, poked his right arm and his long whip
+toward Marcus, and said: "Hu-hullo there--come along?" Having done this,
+Captain Tonkins furtively poured a gill of brandy into the tin cup, and
+drank it under cover of the buffalo robe.
+
+In compliance with this general request, Marcus forbore to open the gate
+of the old gentleman's house, and joined his friends.
+
+"How many people have you called on, you old humbug?" asked Overtop, as
+Marcus drew near.
+
+Marcus was on the point of alluding to the chance acquaintances that he
+had made that morning; but a moment's reflection stopped him.
+
+"I told you," said he, "that my only visit was to be to our odd old
+neighbor. I was at his gate, when you called. And now, what do
+you want?"
+
+"I want to tell you," said Matthew Maltboy, "that Miss Whedell--the
+Juno-like young lady with the handkerchief, you know--is--"
+
+"All your fancy painted her," interrupted Marcus.
+
+"She's lovely--she's divine," said Maltboy, rapturously finishing the
+quotation. "I have made an impression. Congratulate me, old boy!"
+
+"I do," said Marcus, laughing, "and only hope that you will find it as
+easy getting out of the scrape as into it. And what have you
+discovered, Top?"
+
+"That there isn't a sensible woman or an original idea, so far, on the
+block. I wouldn't budge an inch farther, but for Quigg's promise to
+introduce me to a young widow who lives next door--a regular prodigy of
+science and art, according to his story. I think you said she was a
+widow, Quigg?"
+
+"I suppose so," said Quigg, "as I never saw nor heard of her husband;
+and she's lived on this block five years last May."
+
+The three besieged Marcus to lay aside his scruples for once, and join
+them in visiting this accomplished lady. Marcus fought them until his
+patience was exhausted, and then gave in.
+
+The door to which they climbed, bore, on a large and shining plate, the
+name "Slapman." This door was opened to them by a tall negro in livery,
+which, like the wearer, had a borrowed appearance. As they entered, they
+saw a little wiry man, with a pale face full of wrinkles and crowsfeet,
+bounding up the first flight of stairs, two steps at a time. When the
+little man reached the first landing he looked back, and directed a
+strange, suspicious glance at the callers.
+
+The opening of the parlor door discovered a room full of men, who were
+sipping wine, eating cold fowl and confections, talking and laughing
+loudly with each other, or exchanging repartees with a lady who stood in
+the centre of the apartment and shed her light upon all. This lady was
+Mrs. Grazella Jigbee Slapman.
+
+Previous to her marriage, she had been not altogether unknown to the
+corners of several weekly newspapers, under the name of "Grazella." She
+had also cultivated a natural talent for painting, so assiduously, that
+a little cabinet piece of hers, representing a cat, a lobster, and a
+plate of fruit, was considered good enough to exhibit in the window of a
+Broadway print shop, in which her uncle was a silent partner, and was
+approvingly paragraphed in a paper partly owned by her first cousin. To
+gifts capable of producing results like these, she added a great
+aptitude for music; although an incurable indolence, she gracefully
+said, had always prevented her from learning the piano. While yet
+sustaining the name of Jigbee, she had achieved a high reputation in
+private circles as a merciless judge of music. But her conversation had
+been, from earliest girlhood, her chief attraction. She possessed the
+extraordinary faculty of talking with a dozen persons upon a dozen
+different subjects at the same time.
+
+Unlike many people similarly endowed, she did not exercise this
+wonderful gift for the brutal purpose of putting down feebler
+intellects, but only to elicit TRUTH, which she often declared to be the
+sole object of her existence. When, by her alliance with Mr. Slapman, a
+thrifty speculator in real estate, she was installed as mistress of a
+fine house and furniture, and a few thousand a year, the lady naturally
+gathered about her a still larger circle of admirers. Her researches for
+TRUTH were met halfway by people that were supposed to deal in that
+article, abstractly considered; such as poets, painters, sculptors,
+reformers, inventors. Anybody with a new idea was sure to be understood
+and encouraged by her. Her fondness for new ideas was as keen as an
+entomologist's for new bugs or butterflies.
+
+Mrs. Slapman had not made the mistake of neglecting her physical and
+perishable charms in deference to her intellectual and immortal nature.
+She was twenty-four years old, and had clear, sparkling eyes, a fresh
+complexion, good teeth, rich, heavy hair, and a substantial figure. The
+pursuit of TRUTH did not disagree with her health.
+
+Mrs. Slapman bustled out of the little knot of persons about her, and
+advanced in a frank, hearty way to meet her visitors. To Mr. Quigg she
+nodded patronizingly, as to one whom she had long known to be guiltless
+of new ideas; but to the strangers who sought her society, she addressed
+a cordial smile.
+
+Mr. Quigg, having performed his office, judiciously stepped aside, and
+left the honors and burdens of conversation with the three friends.
+
+Matthew Maltboy, with the rashness of youth, opened the verbal
+engagement, by remarking that it was a fine day.
+
+This wretched conventionalism was met by a "Very," so obviously
+sarcastic, that Marcus Wilkeson decided not to utter a remark which was
+at that moment on his lips.
+
+At this embarrassing juncture, Fayette Overtop came to the rescue. "As
+we alighted from our sleigh, Mrs. Slapman, I noticed how firmly the snow
+at the edge of the street was pressed down by the feet of the hundreds
+who have called on you; and I could not but think how truly that white
+surface, upon which the prints of so many boots were beautifully
+blended, typified the purity of the motives which brought the owners of
+those boots to your door."
+
+"A most original and charming remark!" said Mrs. Slapman. "I must repeat
+it to Chickson. The author of 'A Snowflake's Lament' will appreciate
+that felicitous observation. You have heard of Chickson?"
+
+Mr. Overtop read new books, magazines, literary papers, in considerable
+quantities, but did not remember to have ever met with the name.
+Speaking upon impulse, and to avoid explanation, however, he said:
+
+"Oh, yes--certainly, but have not the pleasure of his acquaintance."
+
+"You should know each other," said Mrs. Slapman. "Excuse me a minute."
+She ran with girlish haste to the other end of the parlors, and brought
+back an undersized young man. When he had been introduced to Overtop,
+and shaken hands with him, the enthusiastic hostess quoted, somewhat
+imperfectly, the beautiful conceit which Overtop had just uttered, and
+remarked that it would be a capital subject for a poem.
+
+Mr. Chickson turned his eyes upward to the ceiling, and then downward to
+the floor, as if he were committing what he had heard to memory, and
+then said it was very curious, but he had thought of the same theme
+before, and was intending to write a poem on it next week.
+
+"Now, that's just like you, you provoking creature!" said Mrs. Slapman,
+tapping the poet playfully with her fan. "It's really selfish of you to
+keep all your poetical thoughts for your poems."
+
+Mr. Chickson smiled pleasantly, but said nothing; and when Mrs.
+Slapman's attention was momentarily attracted by a passing remark from
+another person, the poet improved the opportunity to slip away and take
+another glass of champagne in the corner.
+
+"Ah! gone, is he?" said Mrs. Slapman, remarking his disappearance.
+"Though one of the most promising of our young poets, he is dull enough
+in conversation. It may be said of him, as of Goldsmith, 'He writes like
+an angel, but talks like poor Poll.' You may have read his poem, 'Echoes
+of the Empyrean,' published in the _Weekly Lotus_."
+
+Mr. Overtop was wicked enough to say that he had read and admired it.
+
+"It is a curious fact in the history of the poem, that the subtle
+thoughts which it evolves were the topic of discussion at one of my
+_conversazioni_; and on that very night Chickson told me he had
+forty-five lines written on the subject. The knowledge of that trifling
+circumstance lends additional interest to the poem."
+
+"That is, if anything could lend additional interest to it," observed
+Overtop.
+
+"You are right," said Mrs. Slapman. "TRUTH, like that which animates
+every line of the 'Empyrean,' needs no factitious attractions. You have
+read the 'Empyrean?'"--turning to Wilkeson and Maltboy, who had stood
+hard by during this conversation, calm patterns of politeness.
+
+Mr. Wilkeson, not understanding the question (his thoughts wandering
+back to the pale mechanic and his child), nodded "Yes," and was
+immediately put down on Mrs. Slapman's mental tablet as a quiet
+gentleman of good taste. But Matthew Maltboy, distinctly understanding
+it, was candid enough to say "No," and from that moment was as nothing
+in the eyes of the lady.
+
+Overtop proceeded to deepen the favorable impression which he had made
+upon this charming patroness of intellect.
+
+"Did it ever occur to you how many subjects for the highest order of
+poetry lie unnoticed all about us? Take that chandelier, for example,
+the prismatic drops of which are dull in the shade, but sparkle with
+all the colors of the rainbow in the gaslight. Might not those hidden
+splendors be compared to that genius whose brilliancy is alone evoked by
+Beauty's radiant smile?"
+
+Marcus Wilkeson squirmed, and Matthew Maltboy felt uneasy, while their
+friend was delivering this elaborate idea, and felt easier when he
+reached the end in safety. Mr. Overtop himself shared in the sensation
+of relief.
+
+"Beautiful! beautiful!" cried Mrs. Slapman, in a species of rapture. "I
+must repeat that delicious thought to Chickson. But not now." And she
+looked inquiringly at Overtop, as if in expectation that he would utter
+another new TRUTH immediately. That gentleman not happening to have one
+on his tongue's end, Mrs. Slapman was kind enough to give him time for
+reflection.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X.
+
+INFIRMITIES OF GENIUS.
+
+"Allow me to point out some of my friends, Mr. Overtop. Among them are
+faces which you may have seen. If not, you will at least recognize
+several of the names."
+
+"But I must protest that I am monopolizing too much of your time,
+madam," interposed Overtop, conscious that his neglected friends were
+looking on awkwardly, and waiting for him.
+
+"And I protest against your protesting," said Mrs. Slapman, with a merry
+laugh. So saying, she motioned him to one of the front windows, and,
+under the shade of heavy blue and gold curtains, commenced to point out
+notable guests.
+
+Mr. Overtop observed, first with regret and then with pride, that their
+withdrawal into a corner elicited looks of surprise and curiosity, not
+unmingled with envy, from the little group that hovered about the
+refreshment table, and drank Mrs. Slapman's fine wines, and laughed and
+joked together. He was glad to see that his two friends sauntered
+through the parlors, examining the pictures and articles of taste which
+caught the eye on every side; and that Mr. Quigg was engrossed in the
+examination of some books on a centre table, opening them, and smoothing
+their fair pages with his hand as if they were ledgers.
+
+"You see that stout man with the double chin--the one drinking
+champagne, to the left of the table? That is Mr. Scrymser, a gentleman
+who has made several aeronautic excursions, and talked about a balloon
+voyage to Europe last year. You may remember his portrait, and plans of
+his air ship, in the illustrated papers."
+
+"I do," said Overtop; "and also that he didn't go." "Precisely. Some
+trouble about the currents, I believe. You note that small man, with the
+sharp face--the one sipping a glass, to the right of the table? That is
+Mr. Boskirk, inventor of the _'Submarine Summer House,'_ a species of
+diving bell, which is to be owned and managed by a Joint-Stock Company.
+I have promised to take a few shares in the concern."
+
+"Excuse the digression, madam," said Overtop, "but ought not these two
+gentlemen to change places in life? Is not the heavy one peculiarly
+adapted to the diving bell, and the light one to the balloon?"
+
+Mrs. Slapman smiled, and looked faintly surprised, as if the remark were
+unworthy of her guest. "Probably you know that gentleman under the
+picture of a landscape, talking very earnestly to another gentleman, who
+seems to want to be getting away."
+
+"The man with the long, curly, red hair? I know his face well, and,
+though I have no further knowledge of him, am morally certain that he is
+a social reformer."
+
+"Why?" asked Mrs. Slapman.
+
+"Because I never saw a man with long, curly, red hair, who was not a
+social reformer. Men with red hair--the true carrot tint, I mean--have a
+natural propensity for reform. Some of them repress it, but others give
+rein to their inclinations, go into the reform business, and hang out
+their curls as a sign to all mankind. And all mankind interpret it as
+readily as they do the striped pole in front of a barber's shop."
+
+"A striking thought, truly, and full of TRUTH," said Mrs. Slapman. "I
+will mention it to Mr. Gormit. On reflection, however, I won't. I might
+wound his feelings, for he is an exquisitely sensitive creature. As you
+have ingeniously discovered, he _is_ a social reformer. At present he is
+only known to the public as the editor of the 'Humanitarian Harbinger;'
+but his select circle of friends are well aware that he is devoting his
+ripened genius to the production of a work called the 'Progressional
+Principia,' which will be in four volumes, and exhaust the whole subject
+of social science. This immense undertaking is a favorite subject of his
+ordinary conversation. He is probably, at this very moment, giving a
+general outline of the book to that gentleman on his right.
+
+"That slender young man with the Vandyke beard, cutting into a cake, you
+may not need to be told, is Patching, the painter of those delicious
+interiors which have been seen every year by those who had eyes to find
+them, in obscure corners at the rooms of the National Academy of Design.
+In short, Patching is the subject of a conspiracy in which the Hanging
+Committee is implicated. But though professional envy may place his
+works in the worst possible light, and for some time cast a shadow over
+his prospects, an independent public taste will ultimately appreciate
+his genius. Mark the melancholy that overspreads his features, as he
+tastes that glass of sherry. Next to TRUTH, melancholy is the chief
+characteristic of his style. In a miniature portrait which he painted of
+me, last year, and which is regarded as a capital likeness, he
+introduced a shade of sadness, which is, at least, not habitual
+with me."
+
+Mr. Overtop hastened to say, that of _that_ fact he needed no assurance.
+
+"Without giving a minute account of all my guests, I may say generally,
+that they include novelists, dramatists, actors, and musicians. Some
+you may know by sight. The acquaintance of all you may make at a
+future time."
+
+At this strong hint, Mr. Overtop replied, that he should be only too
+happy. He had by this time come to the conclusion that there never was a
+more candid and delightful widow than Mrs. Slapman; and, furthermore,
+that she was that rarity--a sensible woman--of which he had been so long
+in search. Mr. Overtop mentally hugged himself.
+
+"By the way, sir--you will pardon the impertinence of the question--but
+to what profession do you belong?"
+
+"I am a lawyer, madam," said he, fearful that the announcement would not
+be well received. "Fayette Overtop, firm of Overtop & Maltboy."
+
+Mrs. Slapman mused a moment, and said:
+
+"It is a little singular, that, among my large collection--I mean
+circle--of friends, there shouldn't be a single lawyer."
+
+"As I am a _single_ lawyer, Mrs. Slapman, it is within my power to
+supply that deficiency among those who are honored with your
+friendship." Mr. Overtop thought, with some reason, as he finished this
+remark, that he had never said a better thing in his life.
+
+Mrs. Slapman's severe taste rejected Overtop's pun, but not himself, and
+she was about to say that she should put him on the list for her next
+_conversazione_, when another awkward interruption occurred, in
+this wise:
+
+Signor Mancussi was a gentleman with an Italian name and a perfect
+knowledge of English, who sang bass parts in a church up town, and
+enjoyed the reputation of having personated the chief Druid in Norma, at
+an early period of the New York opera. M. Bartin played one of numerous
+violins at the Academy of Music, and was believed to be kept down only
+by a powerful combination. Three months before this New Year's day, both
+of these gentlemen had volunteered their services, in company with many
+other musical people, to give a grand concert in aid of a benevolent
+enterprise. To M. Bartin, as a man supposed to know something of sharp
+management, from his connection with the opera, was intrusted the
+supreme control of the whole affair. It is due to M. Bartin to say, that
+he tried to perform his laborious duties faithfully and with perfect
+justice to his associates.
+
+When, therefore, in ordering the printing of the gigantic posters which
+heralded the concert, he directed his own name to be placed at the head
+of the "eminent artists who had offered their services for the
+occasion," and in type half as large again as any of the rest, he only
+expressed a conscientious opinion of his superiority over all of them.
+In this opinion his associates happened to disagree with him, each one
+claiming that himself, and nobody else, was entitled to typographical
+precedence.
+
+Most keenly was the alleged injustice felt by Signer Mancussi, who stood
+at the foot of the sloping list in letters less than an inch long; and
+he had made a solemn vow to revenge himself on M. Bartin the first time
+that they met after the concert. Their simultaneous appearance at Mrs.
+Slapman's was that time. M. Bartin had been privately informed of the
+Signer's intentions, and regretted that that gentleman's ridiculous
+vanity should get the better of his judgment. Seeing him at Mrs.
+Slapman's, M. Bartin avoided the Signer's presence, fearing they might
+come into a collision disgraceful to the time and the place. The Signer,
+for the same considerate reasons, kept shy of M. Bartin. After dodging
+each other for a long time, they were at last brought, by accident, face
+to face. M. Bartin was calm. Signor Mancussi tried to be tranquil, but
+those small, lean black letters at the foot of the list rose vividly to
+his mind; and, before he could check himself, he had whispered, or
+hissed, between his set teeth, the word,
+
+"SCOUNDREL!"
+
+M. Bartin was taken unawares, but had sufficient presence of mind to
+reply, "You're another," in a whisper, low, but freighted with meaning.
+
+Whereupon the Signor responded, also under his breath, "You're no
+gentleman." To this assertion, M. Bartin answered, with masterly irony,
+"And you _are_ a gentleman, now, a'n't you?"
+
+Up to this point the controversy had been pleasantly conducted in
+whispers, and was unnoticed by the bystanders; but M. Bartin's last
+insinuation had the strange effect of maddening the Signor still more.
+He lost his self-control, and said, in an audible voice:
+
+"You're only a scraper of catgut, anyhow."
+
+M. Bartin, also oblivious of the proprieties, retorted, louder still:
+
+"And what are you but an infernal screech owl?"
+
+Cries of "Hallo!" "What's the row?" "Hush!" and "For shame!" rose from
+all parts of the room, and the two musical gentlemen, conscious that
+they had grossly misconducted themselves, stepped back a yard from each
+other, and were immediately surrounded by several friends, and kindly
+told that they were a pair of fools.
+
+Mrs. Slapman and Overtop rushed to the spot. The latter measured the two
+combatants with his eye, to see if he could safely undertake to pitch
+both, or either of them, out of the room, if requested so to do by the
+widow, and concluded that he could not.
+
+Mrs. Slapman was much embarrassed by this painful outbreak. It was only
+three weeks ago that M. Bartin had dedicated a new quadrille to her; and
+but a fortnight since Signor Mancussi had sung four operatic airs
+gratuitously at one of her musical and dramatic _soirées_. But respect
+for herself and for her guests--especially for Mr. Overtop, of whose
+talents she had formed an exalted opinion--pointed out her path of duty,
+and she followed it. She stepped between the two disputants, and cast a
+look of surprise and regret at each.
+
+"I was hasty," said Signor Mancussi.
+
+"And I was too impulsive," said M. Bartin.
+
+"Then, gentlemen, if you would merit my continued friendship, please
+make up your little difference, by shaking hands."
+
+They recoiled from the proposition a moment, but, being pushed together
+by their respective friends from behind, took each other's right hand,
+shook it once feebly, and said distinctly, with their eyes, "We shall
+meet again!"
+
+"Very well done," said Mrs. Slapman, with the air of an empress,
+tempered by a charming smile. "And let us hope that is the end of it.
+Now, Mr. Overtop, allow me to offer you some refreshment."
+
+Mrs. Slapman was in the act of handing a glass of champagne to the
+favored Overtop, when an unearthly shriek was heard, which startled the
+steadiest nerves. This shriek was repeated three times in quick
+succession, and seemed to come from the sidewalk in front of the house.
+There was a general rush to the window; but Wilkeson, Overtop, Maltboy,
+and Quigg ran for the street at once, surmising the source of the cry.
+
+There stood Captain Tonkins, in the sleigh, leaning against the
+dashboard, holding in one hand an empty jug, and in the other his whip.
+Around the sleigh were a dozen men and boys, who had been convoked by
+the cry of "FELL' CITIZENS!" More men and more boys were seen coming in
+the distance.
+
+As the four lessees of the sleigh approached him, the Captain again
+yelled, "FELL' CITIZENS!"
+
+"For heaven's sake, stop, Captain!" cried Quigg.
+
+A smile of contempt played upon the Captain's large lips, as, shaking
+his whip defiantly at the agitated group, he shouted:
+
+"I--I know ye. Don' think I doknowye. You're Mulcahy men, ev' moth's
+sonofye; and you've come to this 'ere meet'n' to put down free-ee-dom of
+speech. But yer carndoit. 'Peat it, yer ca-arn-doit. I d'fy ye. I
+d'fy ye."
+
+The Captain was a powerful man; and Quigg, as well as his companions,
+singly and collectively, shrank from trying physical persuasion on him.
+Besides, a crowd of people had gathered, who were greatly enjoying the
+scene, and desiring its continuance for an indefinite period.
+
+"FELL' CITIZENS!" continued the Captain, "now these vile tools o'
+Mulca-a-hy silenced, warntellye I'm can'date School 'Spector in this
+ward. Fuss place, I'm only reg'l can'date. Secun' place, I feel great
+int'st mor'l wants of all your chi-i-ld'n, Masay they are my own
+child'n, Go'bless'em. Third place, my dear FELL' CIT'Z'NS, if yer'll
+jess step in ter Phil Rooney's 'fore ye vote, yer'll find some whi-i-sky
+there; and that--that's bess arg'ment, after all."
+
+Having reached the logical end of the first and last speech ever made in
+public by Captain Tonkins, the Captain tumbled out of his sleigh, and
+sprawled upon the snow; whereat the bystanders shouted for joy, and the
+widow Slapman and two large windows full of guests shook with laughter.
+
+"'S pla-at-form fall'n'?" asked the Captain.
+
+"Yes," replied one of the citizens, humoring the idea; "the platform
+gave way, and you tumbled to the ground."
+
+"I--I'no' who di't," resumed the Captain. "Them Mulca'men. They saw-awed
+posts." Here the Captain descried two widow Slapmans smiling on him from
+a window, and gallantly kissed his hand at them.
+
+His heavy body was tumbled into the rear of the sleigh, a buffalo robe
+thrown over it, and Captain Tonkins was then unconsciously borne toward
+the bosom of his family, in Minetta lane (a friend officiating as
+driver), amid the cheers of his late audience.
+
+The three bachelors were satiated with their day's experiences. They
+raised their hats to Mrs. Slapman, still laughing at the window, and
+walked smartly home. Mr. Quigg, deriving much comfort from the thought
+that Captain Tonkins had not been paid for his sleigh, and would not be,
+hastened to a neighboring stable, hired the only remaining team, and
+continued his round of calls, giving one minute to each.
+
+
+
+BOOK SECOND.
+
+POLISHING.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE ENIGMA.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson's new acquaintance throve rapidly. Mr. Minford's
+dealings with the world had made him shy and suspicious, and he was at
+first disposed to keep his benevolent visitor at a safe business
+distance. But the heart of the thoughtful mechanic could not long resist
+the kind and earnest sympathy of the man who sought to be his friend.
+
+With a caution born of experience, however, Mr. Minford, before
+admitting the new guest to his full confidence, called upon a number of
+Wall street brokers and South street merchants, to whom Marcus had
+referred him, and learned from them that that gentleman bore a
+reputation of the rarest honor and purity of character. While giving
+this united testimony, however, they all agreed in condemning Mr.
+Wilkeson's eccentricity--insanity, one broker called it--in retiring
+from business at the very moment when he was most successful, and had a
+great fortune within easy reach. The fact that he had retired with one
+hundred and fifty thousand dollars, instead of mitigating his offence in
+the eyes of those critics, increased it. "Why," said a noted bear, "with
+that amount of capital, and Wilkeson's first-rate talents--when he chose
+to use them--he might have become the king of Wall street. It's a pity
+so smart a fellow should make a wreck of himself." And the bear heaved a
+sigh of commiseration; which was by no means echoed by Mr. Minford, who
+gathered, from all this evidence, an increased esteem for his
+benefactor.
+
+From the time when he first crossed the threshold of the house on his
+mission of mercy, Pet had looked upon him with the deepest reverence.
+She had read, in story books, of mysterious gentlemen who went about
+doing good merely for the pleasure of it, and who always reached the
+scene of distress with fairy-like certainty, when everybody and
+everything would have gone to ruin without them. Such a strange,
+supernatural embodiment of goodness seemed Marcus Wilkeson to her
+childish fancy. When he entered the room--and he was an every-day caller
+now--she looked around with great anxiety to see that all the chairs
+were in their proper places; that there was no dirt or dust visible
+anywhere; that everything was in a state of order and cleanliness worthy
+so exalted a guest.
+
+She would run to take his overcoat and hat and cane, and place them as
+carefully in the clothes press as if they had been the robe, crown, and
+sceptre of a king. Then she would sit in her little chair, and take her
+sewing, or knitting, or embroidery, and pretend to be all absorbed in
+it, while she was listening eagerly to every word that Marcus addressed
+to her father, and occasionally looked up at the face of their guest,
+and thought how noble it was, and how proud she should be to call
+him uncle.
+
+When he spoke to her, as he often did, and asked her about her work, or
+her companions, or her studies (upon the latter subject he had grown
+quite curious, of late), she would feel that she was blushing, and
+answer, with downcast eyes, and be half glad and half sorry when he
+ceased to question her, and would then sit and torment herself by
+recalling what she had said, and thinking how much it might have
+been improved.
+
+A sharp-eyed observer, had such been present, accustomed to studying
+the human face and weighing motives, would have been puzzled to guess
+the exact nature of the feelings which Marcus entertained for the
+pretty, innocent young creature who sat there, always plying her little
+fingers at some useful work. The puzzle would have been a still greater
+one for Mr. Wilkeson himself. He felt a profound interest in Pet; and
+she it was, and not the pale mechanic or his novel machine, that led him
+daily up those three flights of rickety stairs to that humble room. He
+said to himself, and he would have said to anybody who was entitled to
+call upon him for an explanation, that he had always loved children, and
+that the beauty and goodness of this child had deeply interested him. If
+there was any other motive at the bottom of his heart, he studiously
+concealed it from himself, as he would have concealed it from all
+the world.
+
+During these visits, Mr. Minford pursued his work without interruption.
+The screens, which were at first jealously closed, were now thrown open,
+and the inventor sat there in full sight of his visitor, laboring at his
+great mechanical problem. Repeatedly he had begged of Marcus the
+privilege of explaining to him the principles of the machine; but that
+gentleman had always resolutely declined, for the reasons before stated.
+And he had always observed that, a few moments after such refusal, the
+face of the inventor would brighten up, as if with joy that he had not
+parted with his secret even to one who held a fifth interest in it.
+
+Of the wonderful results which the machine was sure to accomplish, Mr.
+Minford was never tired of talking, nor Mr. Wilkeson of hearing,
+although, at these times, his eyes followed the flying motions of Pet's
+fingers, as if they were a part of the wonder of which the inventor
+discoursed so glowingly.
+
+Precisely what the machine was to effect, when completed, Marcus
+Wilkeson would never have known, if he had been the most attentive of
+listeners. Mr. Minford spoke in vague, general terms, that afforded no
+clue to the mystery. He talked of old philosophers and mechanicians, who
+had failed to discover an unnamed secret of Nature, because they had no
+faith in its existence. Complete faith in the existence of the thing to
+be discovered, as well as in the ability of the searcher to find it, he
+regarded as indispensable conditions of an inventor's success.
+
+The fact that the natural law which he was trying to demonstrate had
+been pronounced an impossibility by professors of science, should weigh
+as nothing in the mind of any man who remembered how every great
+invention of the age had in turn been stamped "impossible" by those
+dogmatizers in their academical chairs, their books, and their reviews.
+Latterly (Mr. Minford confessed), the scientific theorists had been more
+tolerant toward other people's inventions (they never invent anything
+themselves); but with regard to the one upon which he was now engaged,
+they had, with complete unanimity, decided that the thing could not be
+done, and charitably called every man an idiot or a lunatic who
+attempted to do it.
+
+"The world has at last fallen into this belief," Mr. Minford would say,
+bitterly, "and the few people with whom I am acquainted would all agree
+in echoing these scientific opinions, if they knew what I am working at.
+But no one shall know--excepting you, Mr. Wilkeson, to whom I should be
+most happy to explain everything, if you would only let me. This
+prejudice is too deep rooted to be readily pulled up. Even when my
+invention is perfected, and has entered upon its boundless career of
+usefulness, I know that it will be called a humbug; that people will
+look at it, and see it in operation, and still say it is a lie. Yet the
+time will come when the professors of science will feel proud to
+expound, by formulas, the very invention which they have shown, by
+formulas, to be an absolute contradiction of all the laws of Nature. As
+for the rabble who make up the world (the inventor's lips curled as he
+said this), they will be glad to atone for the mad hue-and-cry with
+which they will follow me at first, by giving me, at last, limitless
+wealth and immortal fame."
+
+Mr. Minford's eyes flashed; and Marcus Wilkeson, looking up at them from
+Pet's volant fingers, saw in their sudden glare what he took to be the
+evidence of genius; but what, in an ordinary man, he would have called a
+decided symptom of insanity.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+A DELICATE PROPOSITION.
+
+One afternoon--when Mr. Minford was in excellent humor, having made a
+great discovery in the course of his experiments the previous
+night--Marcus thought it a good opportunity to propose something that
+had been on his mind for a week past.
+
+"Mr. Minford," he said, "will you excuse me for meddling a little in
+your household affairs?"
+
+"Not if you offer me any more kindness," returned the inventor, smiling
+gratefully at his guest. "I am too much in your debt already."
+
+"But you forget that I hold an interest in your invention, which you
+would make me take. I consider that more than payment in full."
+
+"So you have confidence in my success?"
+
+"You have begun to inspire me with it, I confess," replied Marcus,
+indulging in a little unavoidable flattery. "But--but it was not to
+_you_ that I was about to offer any kindness," he continued, emphasizing
+the personal pronoun, and looking hard at Pet, who bent patiently over
+her work, and began to blush in anticipation that her name would be
+mentioned, Mr. Minford raised his eyes from a ratchet which he was
+finishing in a vice, and glanced with curiosity at the speaker.
+
+"Do you not think, sir, that your daughter might profitably spare a few
+hours every day toward the completion of her education? You have told
+me that her studies were interrupted by a change in your circumstances,
+some years ago."
+
+"Certainly she might," answered the inventor, "and I thank you for the
+suggestion. This machine has so completely engaged my thoughts, that I
+had quite lost sight of the dear girl's education. I should say,
+however, that I have been expecting at any moment to put the finishing
+touch on my invention, the very first profits of which I shall spend in
+employing a dozen teachers, if need be, for my little Pet. She shall be
+an educated lady, if money can make her so. Sha'n't you, Pet?"
+
+The young girl's fingers twinkled faster at her work. "I hope so,
+father," said she.
+
+"But, Mr. Minford, it is possible--barely possible, you know--that your
+invention may not be completed, nor money be realized from it, for many
+months; perhaps one or two years. Suppose--only suppose, of course--your
+triumph to be postponed for even one year; your daughter will then be
+one year older, and less fitted to acquire the accomplishments which you
+desire her to possess, than she now is. Pardon the suggestion, if it is
+an obtrusive one. I plead the sincere interest which I take in you and
+her as my only excuse."
+
+"No apology is needed, my dear sir," replied the inventor "I know and
+appreciate your thoughtful kindness toward us; and I consider your
+advice most excellent, especially as I intend to travel in Europe, and
+take out patents for my invention there. It would be desirable to have
+my Pet learn French, and also to improve her knowledge of music. You
+understand the English branches pretty well, I believe, my dear. Let me
+see--how long is it since you left school?"
+
+"Three years, pa."
+
+"True! true!" said the inventor, sadly. "It was when our troubles first
+began, and I found it necessary to economize. But I did very wrong to
+take you from school at that time."
+
+"You forget, pa," replied his daughter, in a sweet, chiding voice. "You
+wanted me to go on with my studies, but I said that you must save the
+tuition money, and let me learn to keep house. Don't you remember, pa?"
+
+"Yes, child; I remember. And I was selfish enough to allow you to make
+the sacrifice. But you shall have schooling to your heart's content now,
+whether you will or not. I agree with our dear friend, that no time
+should be lost in resuming your education. I shall insist upon setting
+apart two hundred dollars for that purpose. Enough money will still be
+left to perfect my invention; and that, too, within a month,
+notwithstanding" (he added, playfully) "Mr. Wilkeson's discouraging
+remarks a moment ago."
+
+"And I shall insist upon not taking the money, pa," said Pet, laughing,
+but shaking her head, and patting her feet on the floor in the most
+decisive manner.
+
+"And I shall insist on furnishing the money," said Marcus Wilkeson,
+folding his arms, and looking very much in earnest. "Let us see who can
+be obstinate the longest."
+
+"Then _I_ shall insist on your taking another fifth interest in the
+invention. Upon that point I am immovable." Mr. Minford folded his arms
+likewise, to imply that nothing could shake his granitic determination.
+
+"Ah, now I see some prospect of a friendly arrangement. I will pay five
+hundred dollars for another fifth, and esteem it a good bargain,
+provided your daughter consents to let one half of it be spent on her
+education. What do you say to that, Pet?"
+
+"That I thank you very much for your kind offer," said the young girl,
+whose eyes sparkled with gratitude; "but I must not accept it. Pa will
+need all the money he can get to finish his work. I know it."
+
+Marcus and the father exchanged pleasant looks, and the former said,
+with an ill-assumed sternness:
+
+"Then I don't advance another cent to him. I have named my conditions,
+and they must be accepted. You have no idea, Pet, what a tremendously
+obstinate fellow I am when I'm roused."
+
+Nobody could have gathered the idea from his intensely amiable face at
+that moment.
+
+"I see, my dear, that we must yield to this determined man," said Mr.
+Minford, winking at Marcus. "We shall never have any peace with him
+until we do."
+
+"You know best, pa," returned his daughter, who shrank timidly from any
+further discussion with their guest.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson was delighted with the perfect confidence which father
+and child reposed in him. "Now that this little matter is happily
+settled," said he, "I must tell you that I have already taken the
+liberty of selecting a school for her."
+
+"How can we ever repay your goodness?" said Mr. Minford.
+
+"It is situated only two blocks away," pursued Marcus.
+
+"Capital!" cried Mr. Minford; "for then she will never be far from
+home."
+
+"And if you want me at any time, pa, you can send for me, and I can be
+here in a moment," said Pet. "It will be so delightful!"
+
+"It is a private school, and, if your daughter prefers, she can be
+taught separately from the other pupils. Miss Pillbody, the teacher,
+tells me that she can give her an hour and a half in the morning, before
+ten o'clock, and half an hour in the afternoon, after four o'clock."
+
+"That will suit me exactly, pa," cried Pet, clapping her hands with
+glee; "because then I can get your breakfast, dinner, and supper, and do
+all the housework, without any interruption in my studies."
+
+"Miss Pillbody thought the arrangement would suit you. She is a
+perfectly competent teacher of French, Italian, the English branches,
+music, drawing, the dead languages, and higher mathematics--quite a
+prodigy, I assure you, for a lady not yet twenty-two years old." (Marcus
+was addressing the father.) "I have been particular in my inquiries, and
+all who know her speak in the highest terms of her remarkable
+attainments, her ability to teach others, and her goodness of heart.
+Your daughter will like her, without doubt."
+
+"I know I shall," said Pet, with enthusiasm. "There are so many things
+that I will learn, pa. First, music--"
+
+"She has a fine piano, and plays splendidly," remarked the guest. "I
+heard her."
+
+"And French and Italian, to please you, pa--that is, if I can learn
+them--and everything else that the lady will teach me. I shall be so
+happy, sir."
+
+The father and the guest smiled at the zeal with which this young
+beginner proposed to grapple with the difficulties of human knowledge.
+It was fortunate for her that a long series of hard and injudicious
+teachers had not already sickened her of learning, and that she brought
+a fresh and uncorrupted taste to the work.
+
+Pet was thinking which one of her two dresses (equally faded) she should
+wear to school, and what bit of ribbon or trimming she could introduce
+in her old bonnet, to improve its general effect. Marcus Wilkeson was
+marvelling at the confidence which the inventor and his daughter placed
+in him, and at what there was about him to inspire it. Mr. Minford was
+congratulating himself on having met with a man so generous and sincere
+as this Mr. Wilkeson, and so entirely disinterested, too: "For,"
+reasoned the inventor, "he cannot appreciate, as I do, the enormous
+value of my discovery, and does not dream that his portion of it will
+compensate him for his outlay more than a hundred times over."
+
+The silence was broken by a sound as of heavy boots trying to move
+softly on the stairs, and a subsequent modest rap at the door.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+AN AUXILIARY OF MODERN CIVILIZATION.
+
+The boy Bog rapped, and entered. He was more neatly dressed than when
+Marcus saw him on the occasion of his first visit. His patched and
+threadbare coat was replaced by a neat roundabout jacket; his greasy,
+visorless cap, by a flat felt hat, of which the brim was symmetrically
+turned up; his tattered shoes by great cowhide boots. The boy was of
+that age when the human frame grows with vegetable-like rapidity; and he
+seemed to hare increased a little all around within three weeks.
+
+The boy looked distressingly awkward in his new articles of attire. Had
+he stolen them, he could not have appeared more guilty in presence of
+the rightful owner.
+
+"Why, Bog!" said Mr. Minford, reproachfully; "where have you been these
+three weeks? Not called to see us once!"
+
+The boy's confusion increased at this unexpected salutation, and he hung
+down his head at the threshold of the door. Mr. Minford partly reassured
+his bashful visitor, by springing forward, shaking him heartily by the
+hand, and saying, with earnestness, "My good lad, I am always glad to
+see you." Pet was also by his side in an instant, and warmly shaking the
+other hand. "You look real nice, Bog," said she. Mr. Wilkeson also came
+forward, and said, "Don't you remember me, Bog?" and clasped him by the
+right hand when the inventor had relinquished It.
+
+Bog bowed and scraped and blushed, and murmured "Thank you, very well,"
+several times, confusedly, and at last settled down into a chair which
+was pushed under him by Pet. Having crossed his legs, he began to feel a
+little more at ease.
+
+"You've been very busy of late, haven't you, Bog?" asked Pet, charitably
+anticipating an excuse for the boy's long absence.
+
+"You'd better believe it," replied Bog, not looking at her, but studying
+the pattern of his left boot. "The day after I called here last, Mr.
+Fink he got a job to stick up bills for a new hair dye, all the way from
+here to Dunkirk, on the Erie Railroad. Well, he couldn't go, cos he had
+lots o' city posting, ye see; so he hires me to do it for ten dollars a
+week and expenses. The pay was good, he said, because the work was
+extry hard. The bills was to be posted on new whitewashed fences, new
+houses, and places generally where there was signs up telling people not
+to 'post no bills.'"
+
+"That was a singular direction, Bog," said Mr. Minford.
+
+"So I told Mr. Fink," replied the boy; "but he said as how them were the
+hair-dye man's orders. He said the idea was to make folks look at bills
+who wouldn't notice 'em if they was on a place all covered over with
+adv'tisements. They was to be posted up high and strong, so that the
+owner of the property couldn't tear 'em down easy. Mr. Fink thought the
+idea was a good one; but he owned it was a little risky."
+
+"Perhaps that is why he didn't care to do it himself," suggested Marcus
+Wilkeson.
+
+"Mebbe," said Bog; "but I didn't consider it no objection. I told him I
+was goin' to be a bill poster, and wanted to study every branch o' the
+business." At this point Bog hitched his chair nervously, uncrossed and
+recrossed his legs, as if he were conscious of trespassing on the
+patience of his auditors, and then went on: "Well, I hurried home, and
+saw that aunt didn't want for nothin', and then I started on my travels.
+I should ha' called and seen you, Mr. Minford," he added, casting a side
+glance at the inventor, "but I hadn't time."
+
+"No excuse necessary, my good Bog," returned Mr. Minford, kindly.
+"Business before pleasure, you know. But I am anxious to hear how you
+got along with the job."
+
+"Well, pooty hard," said Bog, emphatically, "though I made out to go all
+through the State, and stick up six thousand bills, every one on 'em on
+a new house, shop, or fence. Lemme see--I was chased seven times by big
+dogs that was set on me, shot at three times"
+
+"Why, poor Bog!" interrupted Pet; "you wern't hurt, I hope?"
+
+"No, Miss Minford; I wasn't hurt," answered Bog, looking her in the face
+for the first time since he entered the house, "though I got one through
+my old cap."
+
+"I'm _so_ glad it was no worse, Bog."
+
+These words of sympathy from the young girl flustered the poor boy for a
+minute. Then he rallied:
+
+"Besides that, I was took up four times by the perlice, and was carried
+afore justices of the peace. When they asked what I had to say why I
+shouldn't be fined, I told 'em the whole truth about it, and they all
+laughed except one, and said it was really funny, and they hadn't no
+doubt the hair dye was a very good thing to take, but could tell better
+after they had tried some. I told 'em that the hair-dye man would send
+'em a dozen bottles apiece. Mr. Fink had d'rected me to say this, if I
+was 'rested and brought afore a justice. The justices--that is, all of
+'em but one--then said they didn't want to be hard on me; and as that
+was my first offence, they would let me go without any fine. And they
+did, after givin' me their names, and tellin' me to be sure to have the
+bottles sent on jest as soon as could be. Ye see, they were all as bald
+on the top o' their heads as punkins. But the fourth justice that I was
+took to, he wasn't bald, but had a crop o' hair like a picter; and when
+I offered to put down his name for a dozen bottles, he swore, and fined
+me five dollars for what he said was a insult to the dignity of justice,
+and five dollars for postin' up bills in places where it was agin the
+law. Mr. Fink had give me money from the hair-dye man to pay fines, as
+well as my board; so I didn't care. But--but I am talking too much."
+
+Bog paused, because, on taking a stealthy observation around him, he
+suddenly become conscious that his three auditors were listening
+attentively to his story.
+
+"Not at all, my dear Bog," said Mr. Minford. "I, for one, am curious to
+know how this ingenious plan of advertising, in defiance of the law,
+succeeded." Mr. Wilkeson expressed himself curious on the same point.
+Bog, thus encouraged, continued:
+
+"When I come home, after havin' stuck up six thousand bills in the
+principal towns and villages along the route, I went right to Mr. Fink.
+He shook hands with me, and ses he, 'Bog, your fortun's made.' 'How's
+that?' said I. 'Why, ses he, 'you're the greatest bill poster I ever
+heerd of. Professor Macfuddle" (that was the hair-dye man) "ses the
+money has begun to pour in to him like sixty, and he is buyin' up all
+the hair dye in the market, and puttin' his labils on it to supply the
+demand. He has given me ten dollars to present to you, besides the
+thirty for your wages.' Mr. Fink then give me forty dollars, and ses he,
+'That a'n't all; for I have so much business now, I want a pardner, and
+I'll take you, and give you one third of the earnin's.' I rather guess I
+snapped at the offer; and we is goin' into pardnership to-morrer."
+
+"Success to you," said Marcus and the inventor together. They saw, in
+this illustration of his bill-posting talents, only an evidence of
+business shrewdness that deserved encouragement. The young girl,
+however, viewed it in the light of a violation of law, and therefore
+could not conscientiously approve of it. Bog noticed her silence, and
+guessed the cause.
+
+"Thank you very much," said he; "but I forgot to say I a'n't goin' to do
+any more business on the Erie plan. It a'n't right. Come to think it
+over, I was sorry I done it; and so I told Mr. Fink; and he sed it
+wasn't exackly reg'lar either, and he shouldn't never ask me to do
+it agen."
+
+"I am glad of that," said Pet, quietly.
+
+Bog's eyes were instantly turned toward her with an expression of pride
+and gratitude.
+
+"Oh! of course, it is always best to obey the laws," observed Mr.
+Minford.
+
+"And I wouldn't for a moment be thought to advise anything else," added
+Marcus Wilkeson; "though I never could help admiring pluck and sharpness
+in business affairs."
+
+"I am going to school again, Bog," said the young girl, hastening to
+change the subject of conversation.
+
+Bog looked up, surprised and pleased.
+
+"Mr. Wilkeson," said Mr. Minford, "has taken another small share in my
+invention, and pays me in advance for it. With that, Pet will finish her
+education." The inventor would have made this disclosure of his private
+affairs to no other human being but Bog; for this simple boy was the
+only person he had ever known (excepting Marcus Wilkeson) who had not
+openly ridiculed his mysterious labors.
+
+"I am very glad to hear of it, sir," said Bog, awkwardly, but with an
+air of profound respect. "How--how is the _ma_sheen, sir?" Bog asked the
+question hurriedly, as if the machine were a sick person, whose health
+he had until then forgotten to inquire after.
+
+"Getting on finely, Bog. Only two or three springs, a cog here, a
+ratchet here, a band at this point, and a lever up there (Mr. Minford
+touched portions of the machine rapidly), and then look out for
+a noise!"
+
+"A noise!" repeated Bog, with juvenile earnestness.
+
+"Not an explosion, my good fellow, but tremendous public
+excitement--plenty of fame, mixed with a good deal of abuse at first,
+and a _little_ money, I hope." The inventor's eyes flashed with the fire
+that Bog had often seen; and when he emphasized the word "little," Bog
+knew that he meant to express the boundlessness of the wealth that his
+labors would bring to him.
+
+"I believe it," said Bog, with sincerity pictured in every lineament of
+his honest face. "I've always believed it."
+
+"So you have, my dear Bog; and your faith has often cheered me," replied
+the inventor, patronizingly. "By the way, how's your aunt?"
+
+"Oh, yes; how _is_ your aunt, Bog?" asked Pet. "I had quite forgotten
+her."
+
+"She's pooty well, ony them rheumatics troubles her some. They're
+workin' their way from her left arm into her head, aunt says. Week afore
+last they was in her feet, and they've ben clear round her and goin'
+back agen since then. Queer things, them rheumatics!"
+
+"They are very painful, Bog, you know," said Pet.
+
+"Yes; so aunt says." Bog did not add, as he might have truly done, "A
+thousand times a day."
+
+"Give her my kind regards, Bog, and say I will call and see her,"
+continued Pet.
+
+"My respectful regards also," added Mr. Minford.
+
+"Thank you," said the boy; "but I guess you better not call, Miss
+Minford. Aunt's a good woman, but kind o' cur'us, you know. Them
+rheumatics has made a great change in her." Bog here referred, but made
+no verbal allusion, to a certain friendly call which Pet had once made
+upon his aunt, on which occasion that elderly lady had entertained her
+visitor with a monologue two hours long, giving her a complete history
+of the malady, from its birth in the right great toe, three years
+previous, through all its eccentric phenomena, to that stage of the
+disease which made it, as the venerable sufferer observed with, some
+pride, the "very wust case the doctors ever heerd of."
+
+Upon this fruitful theme, Bog's aunt could and would have discoursed for
+hours longer, but for the appearance of Bog, when she sought a new
+relief from her agonies by abusing that poor fellow, charging him with
+neglect and ingratitude, finding fault with the food which he brought
+home for her from market, and asking him when he was going to buy that
+soft armchair he had promised her so long. Bog laughed, and explained
+this outburst, by saying to Pet, "It's only aunt's rheumatics;" but the
+old lady rejected the explanation, and went on scolding and faultfinding
+with such increased fierceness, that Pet hastily put on her bonnet and
+shawl, and bade the rheumatic grumbler "good-by," saying (which was
+true) that her father would be anxious about her. Since then, the young
+girl had kept away from Bog's aunt.
+
+"I've bought her a nice, soft armchair lately," continued Bog; "but it
+don't do her no good. The rheumatics seem to be getting wusser all the
+time; and the thing that makes them wussest of all is calls. So I guess
+it's better for aunt you should keep away, Miss Minford." Bog prided
+himself on his tact in putting forth the last argument.
+
+Then the conversation turned on Pet's education; Marcus and her father
+fondly discussing what it ought to be, and Bog listening, and looking
+stealthily at the young girl, still busy at her work; and they all sat,
+happy in thoughts of the future, far into the twilight.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+MISS PILLBODY.
+
+Miss Pillbody's school was unknown to the pages of the City Directory.
+It was never advertised in the newspapers, with a long list of "Hons."
+and bank presidents as unimpeachable references. The bright little plate
+on her door exhibited only "Pillbody," in neat script, and no hint of
+the existence of a school within. The school was select to such an
+extent, that not more than a dozen pupils were admitted to its
+privileges; and so private, that, outside of that number, its name was
+not known except among its graduates; and there were reasons why they
+should hesitate to spread its reputation abroad. If strictly classified
+among the institutions of the city, it might be termed, "A school for
+female adults in good circumstances, whose early education had been
+neglected."
+
+The idea of this school originated with Miss Pillbody; and, like many
+other valuable ideas, it was hit upon quite accidentally.
+
+Dorcas Pillbody was the only daughter of a man who had amassed a fortune
+in the oyster business, and had finally retired to a four-story house in
+Sixteenth street, near the Sixth Avenue, where he purposed to spend the
+balance of his days in the dignified enjoyment of his hard-earned money.
+To this secluded oyster dealer, as solitary and happy in the midst of
+his new grandeur as a bivalve in its native bed, came a plausible
+stockbroker, who, after a series of interviews, persuaded Mr. Pillbody
+to make a small investment in the "Sky Blue Ridge Pure Vein Copper
+Mining Company."
+
+The small investment unfortunately turned out well. In less than sixty
+days, the shares that he had bought at ten per cent, sold at
+seventy-five, and ultimately advanced to par. Delighted with this
+unexpected result, Mr. Pillbody determined to stake largely (he had been
+a wholesale oyster dealer, and was a man of comprehensive ideas). Again
+his venture prospered. Mr. Pillbody, intoxicated with success, invested
+his entire means in the purchase of two new mines in a Southern State,
+whose unparalleled richness was certified to by mineralogists of great
+reputation.
+
+Just as Mr. Pillbody was making arrangements to bring these mines before
+the public, his stockbroking friend, through whom he had effected the
+purchase, left for Europe, and it was then discovered that Mr.
+Pillbody's mines, if they existed at all, were ten feet under a swamp,
+on property which belonged to somebody else, the title deeds of which
+had been forged by the adroit operator. Mr. Pillbody could not endure
+his misfortune. He wrote notes bidding farewell to his wife and child,
+and commending them to the care of their relatives, to whom he had
+always been bountifully generous. Then he went to Staten Island by
+ferry, there took a row boat, proceeded to a celebrated oyster bed which
+was the scene of his youthful labors, and drowned himself.
+
+The widow and daughter (the latter twenty years of age, healthy, and
+finely educated) applied to the two brothers of the deceased for
+assistance, and were at once kindly received into their families, and
+sat upon sofas and ate from tables purchased with money (never repaid)
+of the late Mr. Pillbody. The two brothers, upon application to the
+proper tribunal, were appointed executors of the estate, and were not
+long in discovering that it was insolvent. Mother and daughter were
+shifted about with almost monthly regularity from one house to the
+other; and, though they tried to make themselves useful in every
+capacity except that of a servant, they could not disguise the
+conviction that their departure was an event a great deal more welcome
+than their coming. The widow's talent for dressmaking (she had been a
+milliner's apprentice before marriage), though of a high order, and
+exerted to the utmost, failed to please. Miss Pillbody's thorough
+knowledge of French, and the higher branches of an elegant education, as
+well as her proficiency on the piano, and her sweet, simple style of
+ballad singing, were worse than useless acquirements in her
+uncles' families.
+
+Her uncles were cold, stern, ignorant men, who had an intense hatred for
+the mere accomplishments of life. Each had two daughters, who, with the
+natural tastes of the sex, were not averse to the graces of education,
+in the abstract, but could not bear to see them displayed by their
+"stuck-up, pauper cousin," as they often termed that hapless young lady
+in private conversation. A kind offer, which she was imprudent enough,
+to make, to teach them all she knew, had set them against her from
+the first.
+
+The widow endured the cold looks and cutting words of her husband's
+relatives, and even the reproaches which they heaped upon his folly,
+with a widow's patience, and seemed content to remain a poor,
+broken-down, dependent creature. Miss Pillbody, on the contrary, was
+quick to discern and to resent, mentally, the uncivil treatment daily
+experienced by her mother and herself. Had she been alone in the world,
+she would have left those inhospitable roofs when the unkind hints first
+began to be dropped, and trusted to the cold charity of strangers; but
+she could not bear the thought of being separated from her mother. So
+she endured her wretched state of dependence as best she could, while
+she quietly sought for some means of employment that would yield them
+a living.
+
+Profiting by the lessons she had learned from her uncles, she did not
+apply to any person who had known her father and received favors from
+him in their better days. She asked no favor from any one--only work, at
+a fair price. By diligent hunting, she found several opportunities. She
+could earn four dollars a week by embroidering (at which she was
+skilful, and had taken premiums); or two dollars and a half for
+teaching French, twice a week, in a country seminary; or her board and
+washing for inducting a family of four little musical prodigies into all
+the mysteries of the piano. But these tempting offers would still have
+left her mother with her uncles, and she spurned them all.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+A FRIEND IN NEED.
+
+One day, as Miss Pillbody was riding up Broadway, in tending to visit a
+Teachers' Agency for the sixteenth time, she accidentally made the
+acquaintance of a middle-aged lady, who talked a great deal upon the
+slightest provocation, trifled sadly with grammar and pronunciation, and
+was excessively friendly and amiable. The diamonds in her ears and on
+her fingers, and her overdone and gaudy style of dressing, were some
+indication, though not a convincing one, that she was a woman of wealth;
+and Miss Pillbody made bold to ask her if she knew anybody who wanted a
+private teacher in her family.
+
+The lady said she did not, "unless," she added, laughing very loud at
+the humor of the suggestion, "you come into my family, and learn me
+something."
+
+The remark was unpremeditated, but, the moment it was made, the lady
+seemed to be greatly struck with its force, and immediately followed it
+up with the question, "Do you s'pose you could learn grammar and
+pronunciation, and how to talk French, to a grown-up woman like me?"
+Miss Pillbody thought the lady with the diamonds was joking, and laughed
+by way of reply. "But I am ra-ally in earnest," continued the lady,
+thoughtfully, turning three heavy cluster rings on her little left
+finger. "Ye see, my early eddication was rather poor, 'cos I was poor
+then; but my old man made a spec' in tobacco, last year, and now I'm
+pooty well off, and live in good s'ciety. I kinder feel the want of
+grammar, French, and a few o' them things. I like your face and your
+manners, and if you can learn me 'em, I'll give you ten dollars a week
+to come to my house one hour every day, and be my private
+schoolmistress. It'll be rather hard, I s'pose, to learn an old dog new
+tricks; but there is no harm a-tryin'."
+
+Notwithstanding the oddity of the proposition, Miss Pillbody saw by the
+lady's face that she meant what she said. "I think I understand English
+grammar, and French, and the other branches usually taught at
+academies," she replied, "and should be very happy to accept
+your offer."
+
+"Then consider the bargain closed," returned the lady. "Here is my
+'dress" (handing her a card), "and you may come to-morrer mornin', at
+ten o'clock, if that'll suit you. I have no children, and the old man
+will be out at that time, and we shall be as snug as two bugs in a
+rug, ye see."
+
+Miss Pillbody was delighted with the sudden prospect of an honest living
+thus opened to her, and she only feared that she would not be able to do
+enough for her money. So, after she had again thanked the lady for her
+kindness, she said:
+
+"I think I could give you lessons on the piano, madam--unless you
+understand that instrument better than I do."
+
+"Lor' bless me, child!" responded the lady, holding up her thick, red
+hands, and making the diamonds flash in the sunlight; "Lor' bless me!
+them fingers is too stiff to play the pianner now. I've got a splendid
+pianner, though, with an oleon 'tachment, three pedals, and pearl
+keys--cost eight hundred dollar; and a nice piece of furniture it is,
+you may believe. I let it be out of tune all the time. That's an excuse
+for not playing when anybody asks me to, ye know. I don't mind tellin'
+you this, because you'll be sure to find it out." And the lady laughed
+very loudly at the confession of this small deceit, which Miss Pillbody
+assured her was by no means confined to herself, but had been adopted by
+her ingenious sex from time immemorial.
+
+When the middle-aged pupil and her young teacher separated, as they did
+on the arrival of the stage at an up-town jeweller's, where the former
+got out to make a few purchases, Miss Pillbody felt as if she had known
+her patroness for years, and that, in that coarse, showy, good-hearted
+woman, she had found a true friend.
+
+And so it turned out. However dull Mrs. Crull might be as a scholar, she
+was quick-witted as a friend, and was constantly bestowing unexpected
+kindnesses upon Miss Pillbody. Scarcely a day passed that the young
+teacher did not receive from her pupil some little present--at times
+rising to the value of a bonnet or a shawl. Mrs. Crull's all-embracing
+kindness would have extended to the widow Pillbody too (in whom she was
+much interested from the daughter's accounts of her), but for the shrewd
+objection which she entertained against intrusting any one with the
+secret of her pupilage. Miss Pillbody was often and particularly
+enjoined by her not to tell any one--- not even her mother--of it; and
+she saw the advantages of carefully observing the request. Great pains
+were taken to keep Mr. Crull, and the housemaid, cook, and coachman,
+from a knowledge of the mystery.
+
+On Miss Pillbody's arrival daily at ten A.M., she was ushered into the
+drawing room, where Mrs. Crull was always anxiously awaiting her. The
+servant was told to say to callers that "Mistress is out" (Mrs. Crull
+bolted at this trifling deception at first, but soon got used to it),
+and the lesson began.
+
+Mrs. Crull at first thought she was competent to learn her native tongue
+and French together, in a series of half-hour lessons; but she soon
+found out that the latter language had some eccentric peculiarities
+quite beyond her powers of articulation, and that the spelling of a word
+did not afford the slightest clue to the method of pronouncing it. After
+floundering about heroically but hopelessly through the introductory
+chapter of the first French grammar, she gave up the polite tongue in
+despair, consoling herself with the reflection, that speaking bad French
+was worse than speaking no French at all.
+
+Miss Pillbody, who did not venture to advise her pupil on her choice of
+studies, but left her to consult her own fancies undisturbed, heartily
+approved of Mrs. Crull's conclusion, though she acknowledged that New
+York society by no means took that view of the case, but tolerated bad
+French with a courtesy worthy of France itself.
+
+Mrs. Crull's studies were thereafter confined to English spelling,
+grammar, and writing. She declared that she knew enough of arithmetic to
+count change correctly, and wanted to know no more; and that geography
+was of no earthly use to her. Besides, she never could remember the
+names of places.
+
+It was in pronunciation that Miss Pillbody's system achieved the
+greatest good. Anxious to strengthen herself on that weak point, Mrs.
+Crull set a watch on her language, and gave every word a good look
+before she sent it forth. The effect of this constant introspection was
+most happy; but, at times, Mrs. Crull would be thrown off her guard by a
+rush of ideas, and all the old blunders would come out. Toward other
+persons, she became, to some extent, a free teacher, and would, in the
+most obliging manner, rectify their little errors of pronunciation, when
+she was sure of them, and sometimes when she was not.
+
+Of course, Mr. Crull was taken in training by her. That gentleman,
+having made the discovery, early in life, that the less a man says, the
+more he is supposed to know, had acquired a habit of taciturnity which
+had become a second nature to him. His conversation consisted mainly of
+grunts and nods; and it was astonishing how much he could express by
+them. At any rate, they had "made his fortin', and he couldn't ha' done
+more'n that if he'd talked like a house a-fire"--which explanation,
+often repeated, was about the longest one ever known to be uttered by
+Mr. Crull. Therefore Mr. Crull did not offer a large field for the
+exhibition of his wife's new acquirements; but, by drawing him into
+conversation, and then lying in wait for him, she found opportunities to
+exhibit them for his good.
+
+At first, Mr. Crull only stared and grunted. Then he laughed (his laugh
+and Mrs. Crull's laugh were very similar, and were their strongest bond
+of union). Once he said, "Wonder what's the matter with the ole woman?"
+And, on a subsequent occasion, when Mrs. Crull had convicted him of
+three mistakes in five words, he ventured upon this protracted remark:
+"Guess the ole gal feels rather big since she got inter wot they call
+good s'ciety, eh?" This was in allusion to the recent successful
+speculation in tobacco, which had enabled Mr. Crull to buy the best
+house in Twenty-third street, and take the second best pew in a
+fashionable church, thereby placing Mrs. Crull at once within the
+charmed circle of society.
+
+As for himself, Mr. Crull took very little interest in society, having
+observed that society had taken very little interest in him until that
+"lucky turn in terbacker." Mrs. Crull would smile, and confess that
+society had claims upon people, and that, when one is in Rome, one must
+do as the Romans do. The moral of which proverb was, that Mr. Crull
+ought to improve his speech. Mr. Crull replied, by asking "wot
+difference 'twould make a hunderd years from now?" Which observation,
+when Mr. Crull condescended to speak at such length, was a favorite
+argument with him. But he little suspected his wife's secret.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+BRANCHING OUT.
+
+To Miss Pillbody, this quiet little arrangement proved a fortune indeed.
+In two weeks after she became acquainted with her benefactress, she was
+rich enough to take lodgings for her mother and herself at a decent
+boarding house. The old lady entertained singular notions about the
+rights of relationship, and held that it was the duty of her husband's
+brothers to give them a home for the balance of their lives, and
+regarded her daughter's desire to cut loose from her uncles, and be
+independent, as a romantic and absurd notion, born of novel reading, to
+which Miss Pillbody was a good deal addicted.
+
+To gratify her daughter's whim, the widow Pillbody finally consented to
+move into a boarding house, though she did it in the firm belief that
+the good luck which the young lady had fallen upon would be of brief
+duration, and they would be glad to come back to their relatives
+again--their "natteral protectors," as Mrs. P. called them.
+
+In their new residence, Miss Pillbody was happy. The money which she
+earned weekly, and which was always paid to her in advance, was
+sufficient for her own and her mother's board. In addition to other
+presents, Mrs. Crull had forced small sums upon her acceptance, at
+different times; and Miss Pillbody began to enjoy the odd sensation of
+laying up money in a savings bank. Of the future she thought but little;
+first, because she had no head for plans; and second, because Mrs. Crull
+had promised to set her up in a private school; and Miss Pillbody placed
+a blind trust in that lady. An accident, in this wise, caused the
+fulfilment of the promise much sooner than was expected.
+
+Mr. Crull, in getting out of a stage, one day, slipped on the step, and
+dislocated his left shoulder. At his age, careful treatment was
+necessary for an injury of that kind; and the family doctor peremptorily
+forbade him to leave the house for a month. Mr. Crull therefore stayed
+at home, growling like a bear in a cage, and solacing himself with the
+determination to bring a suit for damages against the stage company, the
+carelessness of whose driver (in Mr. Crull's opinion) caused
+the accident.
+
+Mr. Crull, like a good husband, would have nobody to nurse him, apply
+his embrocations, and put on his bandages, but his wife; and Mrs. Crull,
+like a good wife, cheerfully and tenderly performed that duty. But this
+rendered necessary the abandonment of the daily lessons at her house;
+for she was liable to be summoned to her husband's bedside at any moment
+(he sent for her at every new twinge of pain); and, furthermore, it was
+his custom to crawl out of his couch every half hour, and wander
+restlessly through the house, until his wife, under the stern
+instructions of the family doctor, sent him back to bed again.
+
+Mrs. Crull, though not wanting in love for her disabled consort, was
+loth to abandon her lessons. Having tasted of the Pierian spring, she
+desired to drink deeply.
+
+As Miss Pillbody could not continue her course of instruction at Mrs.
+Crull's residence, without being detected in the act by the invalid lord
+of that mansion; and as it was clearly impracticable for Mrs. Crull to
+go to Miss Pillbody's boarding house, and turn the widow Pillbody out of
+the little room which mother and daughter jointly occupied, the generous
+pupil hit upon the idea of renting the ground floor of a house for her
+teacher, setting apart one room as a schoolroom, fitting it up for her
+in comfortable style, and helping her to get wealthy adult pupils enough
+to pay all the expenses of the establishment, and a handsome
+income besides.
+
+Miss Pillbody thankfully accepted the noble offer; though she feared
+that she would never obtain scholars enough to repay the money which
+Mrs. Crull was willing to advance, and also to defray the current
+expenses of housekeeping.
+
+Mrs. Crull entertained no such fears. She had great faith in the
+efficacy of advertising. She had personally known three quacks who made
+half a million apiece out of patent medicines; and one woman who had
+turned a common recipe for removing superfluous hair into an eligible
+establishment in Thirty-second street, and a country cottage, with
+sixteen acres under good cultivation. She believed that newspaper
+advertising was the shortest and surest road to fortune; and the only
+standing cause of quarrel between her and her husband was the latter's
+incredulous "Pooh! pooh!" at her theory upon this subject.
+
+At her request, Miss Pillbody drew up this advertisement, and caused it
+to be inserted twice in three daily papers:
+
+"To LADIES IN GOOD SOCIETY WHO DESIRE TO IMPROVE THEIR EDUCATION.--A
+young lady who has moved in wealthy and fashionable circles, and has
+received the best education that New York city could afford, having met
+with reverses in fortune, would be happy to accept, as private pupils, a
+few ladies whose early cultivation was, for any reason, neglected.
+French, Italian, Spanish, vocal music, the piano, and all the English
+rudiments, taught at reasonable prices. Particular attention paid to
+pronunciation, spelling, and writing. Satisfactory references given
+and required.
+
+"N.B.--Pupils taught separately, and at different hours.
+
+"For further information, address 'Educatrix, New York Post Office.'"
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+There were many points in this advertisement to which Miss Pillbody's
+modesty took exception; but Mrs. Crull insisted upon them in a way that
+permitted no refusal. The little bit of bragging was the principal
+thing, she said. She had always observed that people are inclined to
+believe bragging advertisements, though they openly profess that they
+can't be taken in by them. As for the satisfactory references, she would
+undertake to give them, if they were required--which, of course, they
+would not be, as the mere offering of them invariably sufficed. If
+called upon, she would say that she knew a wealthy lady, the head of a
+family, who had derived the greatest possible benefit from the
+instructions of "Educatrix." If asked who she was, she could answer,
+that "Educatrix" would on no account allow the name to be made known, as
+it was a great merit of her system that she kept the names of her pupils
+a profound secret from each other, and from the rest of the world. The
+good sense of this regulation would at once be appreciated by all mature
+ladies who wished to repair the defects of their early education. Her
+own position as the mistress of an elegant mansion in Twenty-third
+street, would (Mrs. Crull reasoned) entitle her statement to
+ready belief.
+
+The plan worked capitally. "Educatrix" received fifty answers to her
+advertisement, and was busy more than a week calling at the houses of
+those who desired an interview with her. The ladies were all in good
+circumstances, and, without an exception, were the wives of men who had
+made sudden fortunes, after the manner common in the United States.
+Finding themselves elevated above the necessity of cooking their own
+dinners and washing their own clothes, they keenly felt the want,
+hitherto unknown, of an education which would fit them, in a measure,
+for that society whose portals were now thrown wide open to them. Miss
+Pillbody's gentle manners and polished ways gained for her the
+confidence of all; and she could have had fifty pupils daily, at two
+dollars a lesson (the fixed price), of one hour each, if it had been
+possible to teach that number.
+
+Acting on the advice of Mrs. Crull, Miss Pillbody decided to accept only
+twelve pupils, for twenty-four lessons each, and devote six hours daily
+to them. This arrangement would give her six pupils a day; and the
+twelve would complete their course in about two months. Then she could
+take twelve more, and so on. It was plain, from the success of the first
+experiment, that there would never be a scarcity of pupils.
+
+Mrs. Crull then rented the first floor and basement of a suitable house
+in a quiet neighborhood, furnished it nicely, hired a grand piano for
+the front parlor, and turned over the premises and their contents to her
+young teacher. Miss Pillbody brought her mother to their new home, a
+fair share of which had been set apart and fitted up expressly for her.
+
+The old lady admitted, with some reluctance, that the house was not
+badly furnished, and that her daughter's prospects might be worse than
+they were. But who was this mysterious woman, that took such an interest
+in her daughter? What was her motive? she would like to know. And why
+was she so anxious to avoid her (Mrs. Pillbody)? To which questions her
+daughter responded, as she had done fifty times before, that her
+teaching was strictly private, and that none of her pupils would visit
+her, except under a pledge of the profoundest secrecy. Mrs. Pillbody
+shook her head doubtingly, and said, "We shall see," adding that she
+only hoped they would be as comfortable there as they were at Uncle
+John's and Daniel's, that was all.
+
+The school throve. The pupils came with great punctuality at their
+different hours, and were unknown to each other and to the world. The
+secret of the school would never have got abroad, but for the incaution
+of a certain Mrs. Brigback (wife of a man who had been connected with
+the City Government for two years on a nominal salary, and retired
+rich). She was so delighted at the progress which she made in the
+English rudiments, and in the French (being able to ask for bread, or
+fish, or concerning a person's health, in that language), that she could
+not refrain from confidentially advising another lady (the wife of a
+street contractor, suddenly opulent) to take a few lessons from the same
+accomplished teacher. The street contractor's wife was perfectly
+indifferent to society, and had no wish to remedy the defects of her
+early education. She promised secrecy, and the next day told the story,
+at the expense of her friend, to a mutual female acquaintance, who
+passed it on with embellishments to a third, who amused a fourth with
+its narration; and so it went through a succession of confidential
+people, until, one day, it became the subject of conversation in a stage
+in which Marcus Wilkeson was riding. He could not avoid hearing it; and,
+although the two ladies (themselves shockingly astray in their grammar)
+laughed at the absurdity of the thing, Marcus Wilkeson thought it was a
+capital idea. A plan which he had been idly revolving in his mind for
+the education of Miss Minford, began to take shape. The inventor (he
+reasoned) would not be likely to object to a strictly private school for
+his daughter, if the teacher were a lady of correct principles, and
+highly educated.
+
+Upon the last point, Marcus Wilkeson determined to satisfy himself. So
+he addressed a note, through the General Post Office, to "Miss Pillbody,
+New York City," requesting the privilege of an interview on business, at
+the residence of the lady, the exact location of which she was asked to
+designate.
+
+The letter was advertised (Miss Pillbody's address being unknown to the
+carrier), and, about two weeks after it was written, an answer came back
+to Mr. Wilkeson, at his house, giving information as to the whereabouts
+of the lady, and appointing the time for an interview.
+
+Mr. Wilkeson called, and in five minutes' conversation was satisfied of
+Miss Pillbody's moral and intellectual qualifications as teacher, and
+thought himself very fortunate in securing a vacancy among the pupils
+(caused by sudden illness) for Miss Minford. With what perfect
+confidence the suspicious inventor, as well as his simple-hearted
+daughter, accepted the frank offer of their friend and benefactor, we
+have already seen.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+THE LITTLE PUPIL.
+
+It was a pleasant winter's morning, when Mr. Minford and his daughter,
+and their singular friend, made a formal call on Miss Pillbody, by
+appointment. The inventor had overcome a difficulty in his machine, by
+introducing a cam movement, and was in excellent humor. As he walked
+along the streets, he said that the snow and the sky and his future all
+looked bright to him now. Of the two former objects his assertion was
+obviously true, and Pet enjoyed the shining scene, as youth, health, and
+innocence always do, without reference to the future.
+
+A few minutes' walk brought them to Miss Pillbody's private schoolhouse.
+A pull at the bell summoned a stout, red-faced servant girl to the door.
+To the question, if Miss Pillbody was in, she said, "Yaas, sir, ef yer
+plaze" (Miss P. had vainly endeavored to correct her English), and
+ushered her visitors into the reception parlor, or schoolroom.
+
+A pleasant place it was, and nicely warmed with a smouldering coal
+fire, the coziness and comfort of which, were fitly reflected from the
+red carpet, and red curtains, and red plush covered furniture. The grand
+piano, hired for use, gave the room that completely furnished appearance
+that nothing but a piano can give. A book of instruction, open at a
+passage which strongly resembled a rail fence through a rolling country,
+showed that inexperienced hands had recently been pounding the
+instrument. There was no sign of a school or any side, excepting a small
+blackboard, which had been hastily thrust into a corner, and which bore,
+faintly traced in chalk, a sum in simple division.
+
+The visitors sat down in the warm red chairs, and looked around the room
+but a moment, when Miss Pillbody entered by a door connecting with the
+rear parlor. She bowed gracefully to Mr. Wilkeson, and was by him
+introduced to his two companions. To the father she was profoundly
+respectful, and to the daughter tender and affectionate, grasping her
+hand closely, and smiling a welcome upon her.
+
+Pet was instantly fascinated with her future teacher. There was
+something lovable not only in her intelligent face, pale with the
+protracted labors of her daily life, but in the infirmity of her eyes,
+for she was shortsighted, and could see objects distinctly only by
+nearly closing the lids. This peculiarity, not disagreeable in itself,
+won upon Pet's compassion, and made her feel more at home in the strange
+lady's presence than if she were conscious that a pair of full-sighted
+orbs were looking at her, and accurately noting her defects.
+
+Miss Pillbody's occupation, for some weeks past, had given her a new
+idea of the value of time, and she proceeded at once to business,
+without wasting a single word upon the weather. In less than five
+minutes, she had, by artful inquiries and a winning voice, found out the
+exact range and extent of Miss Minford's acquirements, and agreed with
+the father that a further education in the English branches was
+unnecessary at that time (with the exception, perhaps, of an occasional
+exercise in reading), and that his daughter might devote twenty-four
+lessons to French and the piano, with hopes of success, provided she
+could study and practise several hours a day at her own home.
+
+Mr. Minford replied, that she could study French at home to her heart's
+content, but he had no piano. Whereupon Mr. Wilkeson took the liberty of
+suggesting that it might be possible to borrow one, at a moderate rate,
+by the month, and set it up in their front room. Miss Pillbody applauded
+this idea, and it was instantly agreed to.
+
+"For certain reasons, which I will not now mention," said Mr. Minford,
+"I am anxious to hurry up her education."
+
+"By the way, what is your first name, my dear?" asked Miss Pillbody. "It
+is quite awkward to call you Miss Minford, you know."
+
+The inventor answered for his daughter. "Her name is Patty, miss; and we
+call her Pet, for short, instead of Pat, which would be hardly
+appropriate."
+
+"A pretty name," said Miss Pillbody; "and she _is_ a pet, if I mistake
+not." The teacher looked archly at Mr. Minford, and then affectionately
+at the daughter, through her half-shut eyes. "I promise you she shall be
+a pet here, provided, always, she learns her lessons like a good girl.
+We always insist on that first." The teacher waved her hand with
+magisterial authority as she spoke, but accompanied the act with a
+laugh, which made Pet laugh also.
+
+During this conversation, Mr. Minford had dwelt upon his machine in an
+undercurrent of thought; and an idea just then occurred to him, which he
+was desirous to test immediately. He therefore rose, and said that they
+would not detain Miss Pillbody any longer, and that his daughter would
+call and receive the first lesson at any time which that lady
+would name.
+
+"Her hour will be from nine to ten o'clock every other morning, and from
+three to four on alternate afternoons," said Miss Pillbody. "It is now
+half past ten," she added, consulting a watch. "Mrs. Penfeather, my
+eleven-o'clock pupil, is put of town to-day: so Miss Minford--that is.
+Pet--can commence now, and I will give her until twelve o'clock. This
+will save time."
+
+"Good!" remarked the inventor. "The great point is to save time. For
+certain reasons, as I said before, you have none to lose in educating my
+daughter. And, that we may not detain her a moment, Mr. Wilkeson, we
+will leave, if you please."
+
+Marcus Wilkeson was glad to do this, for the conversation had already
+reached its natural terminus. He therefore followed Mr. Minford's
+motion, and grasped his hat and cane.
+
+"You are not afraid to stay here, child?" said-the inventor.
+
+"Oh, no," replied Pet, with a happy laugh. "I already feel quite at
+home."
+
+"And she shall always feel so here, I assure you, sir," added Miss
+Pillbody.
+
+Mr. Minford's new idea occurred to him again with fresh force, and he
+hurriedly said: "Good-by, Pet. Be a good girl, now, and see how much you
+can learn in your first lesson." Then he kissed her, jerked a bow at
+Miss Pillbody, and made his exit into the hall. Marcus Wilkeson added
+his best wishes for the progress of the little scholar, bade her and her
+teacher a pleasant farewell, and followed Mr. Minford.
+
+The child ran after them to the front door, and exchanged good-bys with
+them until they had turned the corner of the next street, when she
+entered the schoolroom, and straightway began her first lesson in the
+accomplishments of life.
+
+
+
+BOOK THIRD.
+
+THE TRAIL OF THE SERPENT.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+"ONE--TWO--THBEE--FOUR."
+
+Pet studied hard, and made great progress. Her father and Marcus
+Wilkeson watched her developing education with equal pride, and
+constantly applauded and encouraged her.
+
+The inventor did not know one word of French beyond the colloquial
+phrases with which everybody is familiar; but he would ask his daughter
+to read the crisp and tinkling tongue to him for hours at a time. He
+would hammer softly and file gently as she read, so that he might not
+lose a word of it. He would hear no news but that which she translated
+from the triweekly French paper published in the city. With correct and
+careful tuition at Miss Pillbody's, these constant exercises at home,
+ambition, and an excellent memory for languages, Pet was soon able not
+only to satisfy her teacher, but to make herself understood, in a small
+way, by a real French woman, Mdlle. Duchette, the forewoman of a candy
+store on the nearest business avenue.
+
+Pet followed every lesson on the piano at Miss Pillbody's by three hours
+of daily practice at home. Marcus had hired for her a small piano,
+warranted to be just the thing for beginners. In other words, the keys
+and pedals were nearly worn out, and could not be much further damaged
+by unpractised hands and feet. This instrument was squeezed in between
+the bureau and the washstand, filling up the last spare place in the
+crowded little room. Pet wanted to have it set up in the next apartment,
+and practise there in the cold, alone; but neither her father nor Marcus
+would listen to that proposition for a moment.
+
+Mr. Minford's nerves were extremely sensitive to sound. They vibrated to
+it, like Aeolian harp in the wind. He placed pianos, cats, fish
+peddlers, and hand organs on precisely the same footing, as nuisances.
+Nothing but the ruling desire to make a lady of his child, could have
+steeled him to the endurance, hour after hour, of her monotonous
+"One--two--three--four," and the discordant banging which accompanied
+those plaintive utterances.
+
+The permanent discords with which the piano was afflicted, or the
+striking of a false note, would sometimes set his teeth on edge; but he
+would only hold his jaws tightly together, beat time with his head, and
+smile a hypocritical approval. Sometimes he would torture himself
+playfully, and make Pet laugh, by running a musical opposition with his
+three-cornered file--a small but effective instrument.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson was equally tolerant of Pet's practice, and there was
+little false pretence in the patience with which he listened. Happily,
+he was not all alive to sounds. Screeches and harmonies were pretty much
+the same to him. Since he was a boy, he had been trying (privately) to
+sing, or whistle, "Auld Lang Syne," and had not yet mastered the first
+bar of it. He watched Pet's little fingers moving up and down the piano
+with mechanical repetition, and was truly interested in the sight--for
+two reasons: first, the motion was graceful; and second, she was
+acquiring an accomplishment which he held in the highest esteem, because
+Nature had put it entirely beyond his reach.
+
+Sometimes, but not often, Bog was a listener at these rudimental
+concerts. Since Marcus had come to the relief of the family, Bog felt
+that his mission was ended. He knew that it was a piece of pure
+hypocrisy to call once or twice a week to see if he could be of any
+service, when he was aware that Mr. Minford had hired a woman, who lived
+on the floor below, to do all their household work, marketing, cooking,
+and general errands. He knew that Pet, on these occasions, asked him to
+go for a spool of thread, or a paper of needles, or a package of candy,
+merely to gratify him with the idea that he was making himself useful.
+When he came into the room tidily dressed, and highly polished as to his
+boots, he blushed even redder than he used to. It was not the
+acquisition of a little money by Mr. Minford that had exalted his
+daughter in the-eyes of Bog, but the French and the music. These two
+accomplishments seemed to lift her into an upper air of delicacy and
+refinement, for which Bog felt that his miserable education and clumsy
+manners quite unfitted him. After Bog had performed some little invented
+errand for her, she would reward him with a short exercise, and Bog
+would sit, with open mouth and crossed legs, staring at Pet's face and
+hands alternately, and beating time with his large red hands on
+his knees.
+
+Bog knew the negro songs of the period, and admired them. He would have
+liked to hear Pet play them, but feared she would think his musical
+taste very bad if he asked her to. Her "exercises," as she called them,
+he considered something perfectly wonderful, and belonging to a class of
+scientific music which a poor fellow like him could not be expected to
+enjoy. But, like many an older and more worldly-wise person, he
+pretended to be thrown into raptures by it, and, at every pause in the
+playing, would say, "Beautiful! a'n't it?" "That's prime!" or
+"Splendid!" or "The best I ever heerd." Sometimes, at his earnest
+entreaty, Pet would read a page of French to him; and he would listen
+with awe and reverence, as to a beautiful sibyl prophesying in an
+unknown tongue.
+
+Bog always paid these visits in the afternoon. Marcus Wilkeson always
+called in the evening. The two had met in the house rarely since New
+Year's. When they accidentally met on the sidewalk, within a square or
+two of the house, as they sometimes did, Bog colored up as if he were
+guilty of something. Once Marcus Wilkeson saw Bog at a distance, turning
+suddenly down a side street, as if to avoid him; and Marcus wondered
+what could be the matter with the boy. By industry and tact, Bog made
+money in his new partnership, and had already laid up a snug sum in the
+savings bank.
+
+Between Pet and her teacher a feeling of sisterly affection had sprung
+up. Miss Pillbody turned with a feeling of relief from her dull elderly
+pupils, stiff in manners, and firmly set in their habits, to this fresh,
+impressible young creature. What she did conscientiously to the others
+for pay, she would have done to Pet for love, had not her bills been
+settled in advance. Whenever Miss Pillbody had a spare hour or two,
+afforded by the indisposition of one of her older scholars (from
+excessive fatigue occasioned by a dinner party or other laborious
+hospitality the night before), she would send the red-headed servant to
+Mr. Minford's, and notify Pet, who was only too happy to go to her
+beloved teacher, and take an extra lesson.
+
+Mrs. Crull could not be called a promising pupil. Her intentions were
+excellent. Her patience and her good nature were unbounded. She was
+always punctual at her lessons. Neither cold nor storm could keep her
+away. While she was in the schoolroom, she would resolutely deny herself
+the pleasure of indulging in more than a dozen episodes on the fashions
+and bits of scandal which she picked up in her cruise through society.
+
+With the exception of these little wanderings, she would go through her
+recitations with as much correctness and docility as a sharp-witted
+child of twelve years. She felt a childlike pride in gaining the
+approval of her teacher. When she was under Miss Pillbody's
+instructions, and knew that every mistake would be courteously but
+firmly corrected on the spot (the teacher's invariable custom), she kept
+such a guard upon her tongue that she sometimes read or conversed in
+long sentences without making a single error. But when she was out of
+Miss Pillbody's sight, there were certain blunders which she fell into
+as surely as she opened her mouth.
+
+Sometimes Mrs. Crull and Pet would meet on the doorsteps of Miss
+Pillbody's house--the one going in and the other coming out--or on the
+sidewalk in the neighborhood. Mrs. Crull would catch the child by both
+hands, smack her heartily on the cheek (no matter how public the kiss),
+and then a conversation something like this would follow:
+
+"How bright and pretty you look this mornin', my darlin!" (Mrs. Crull
+could not remember to pick up the "g's," except under Miss Pillbody's
+eye, and then not always.)
+
+"Thank you, Mrs. Crull; I am quite well. How are you, marm?"
+
+"Oh! smart as a trap. Haven't known not a sick day these ten years."
+(Mrs. Crull was weak on the double negatives.)
+
+"How do you get along?" From motives of delicacy, Pet never added, "in
+your studies."
+
+"Well, I don't mind tellin' you, as you are my confidential little
+friend." Here Mrs. Crull would look around cautiously, to be sure no one
+was listening. "The other studies isn't so hard, but grammar knocks me."
+(Mrs. Crull's nominatives and verbs were irreconcilable.)
+
+Then Pet would say, telling an innocent fib:
+
+"I don't observe anything very wrong, Mrs. Crull."
+
+"Ha! ha! there you are flattering me, you little chick. I know, or
+think, I have improved a good deal with our dear Miss Pillbody; but a
+smart little scholar like you must see lots of mistakes in me."
+
+At this point, Pet would blush, and murmur, "No--no!"
+
+"Humbug!" Mrs. Crull would say. "I know my incurable faults, and I know
+that you know 'em. But Lor' bless you, child! there is plenty of ladies
+in good s'ciety" (Mrs. C. always slurred on the first syllable of that
+word) "who talk as bad as me. Their husbands, just like mine, got rich
+suddenly, you see. I tell you, I was 'stonished to find how many of 'em
+there was. They are thicker'n blackberries. I found out something else,
+too." Here Mrs. Crull would shake her head knowingly, like one who had
+discovered a great truth.
+
+Pet would know what was coming, but would ask: "Pray, what is it, Mrs.
+Crull?"
+
+"Why, I found out that, if you give good dinners and big parties, and
+keep a carriage, and have a conservatory, and rent a pew up near the
+altar, your little shortcomin's in grammar isn't no objection to you.
+'Money makes the mare go.' However, eddication, as Miss Pillbody says,
+is a good thing of itself, and I shall keep on tryin' to get it."
+
+These conversations always ended by an invitation to Pet to visit Mrs.
+Crull. "I'll have our carriage call for you," she would say, "at your
+father's house. We have no children, you know, and the old man would be
+very good to you; though, of course, it wouldn't do to hint about the
+school. But I can trust my little friend for that. Come, now,
+won't you?"
+
+But Pet always modestly declined these kind invitations. She knew her
+father's pride, and his aversion to the patronage of rich people.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+THE FALLING BOARD.
+
+One afternoon, Pet had been taking an extra lesson from Miss Pillbody,
+and had started homeward with a light heart, humming to herself a
+musical exercise which she had practised for the first time that day. A
+few doors from Miss Pillbody's, some workmen were repairing a wooden
+awning. The framework was covered with loose boards, which the
+carpenters were about to nail down. A feminine dread of danger would
+have induced Pet to make a wide detour of this awning; but her mind was
+so fully occupied by the musical exercise, that she walked, unheeding,
+right under it.
+
+"Look out! look out!" shrieked a chorus of voices overhead, accompanied
+by a rattle of falling boards. Pet sprang forward just in time to escape
+one of them, and to catch another on her shoulder. It touched her
+gently, not even abrading her skin, for its fall had been stopped midway
+by a young man.
+
+"Stupid!" "Silly creature!" "The girl's a blockhead!" "Where's her eyes,
+I wonder?" shouted the carpenters, after the manner of carmen and stage
+drivers, when you narrowly escape being run over by _their_
+carelessness, at the crossings.
+
+"Shut up!" said the young man, savagely. "Why the d---l don't you keep
+your boards where they belong, instead of tumbling them down on people's
+heads?--I hope you are not hurt, miss?" (in a gentle voice).
+
+"Oh, no; not at all. I am sure I thank you, sir, very much." Pet
+blushed, and hurried away.
+
+The young man and the carpenters then exchanged the customary abusive
+epithets with each other, which might have resulted in something more
+serious (though such verbal encounters rarely do), but for the desire of
+the young man to overtake the young girl whom he had saved from a
+bruised shoulder, or a worse accident. Shaking his fist at the four
+jeering carpenters, and muttering a farewell execration between his
+teeth, he rapidly followed Pet, and soon came up with her.
+
+"You are sure you are not hurt?" said he. "Those scoundrelly workmen!
+I'll thrash one of them yet."
+
+Pet was confused by the second appearance of the young man at her side,
+though she knew that he would follow her; even her brief experience
+having taught her that it is not in the nature of man to do a kindness
+to a woman, without exacting a full acknowledgment for it.
+
+"No, sir; I am not hurt the least bit," she replied, looking in his face
+no more than gratitude and civility required. Here she would have
+stopped, but she feared (charming simplicity of girlhood) that the
+young man would, some future day, get into trouble with the four
+carpenters. So she added, timidly: "As for the workmen, sir, they were
+not to blame. It was all my fault, running into the danger. I--I beg,
+sir, that you won't say another word to them."
+
+This was a long speech for timid Pet to make to a stranger, and she
+blushed fearfully at the end of it, and wished that the young man
+would go away.
+
+"They deserve a thrashing, every one of them," said he; "but, for your
+sake, I let them go." The young man spoke in a sweet voice, and his
+manner was respectful. Pet had observed, in several hasty side glances,
+that he was nicely dressed, and not ill-featured, in all except the
+eyes. But had his eyes been large and handsome, instead of small and
+forbidding, she would have desired his absence all the same.
+
+"You say you are not hurt," he continued; "but you may be, without
+knowing it. I have heard of people receiving serious injuries, and never
+finding them out till they got home. Have you far to go, miss?"
+
+"Only two blocks farther," said Pet, turning the corner.
+
+"The very route I was going," observed the young man.
+
+Although Pet felt that the young man's company was unnecessary and
+disagreeable, she did not like to tell him so. She kept silence until
+she reached her home, when she said, "I stop here, sir." She would have
+added, "Good-by, sir," or "Thank you, sir," or something equivalent, but
+instinct checked the expression, and she darted into the entry (the door
+being accidentally ajar), and shut the door after her, before the young
+man could say a word. Although the door was shut, he raised his hat
+respectfully as one often does on Broadway _after_ he has passed a
+female acquaintance upon whom he suddenly comes--the salute being
+received and acknowledged with a stare by the next lady, or ladies,
+following after. The young man then noted the number of the house,
+nodded satisfactorily to himself, and strolled very leisurely along the
+street, as if neither business nor pleasure had urgent demands upon him.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+SNEAKING JUSTIFIED.
+
+Neither Pet nor the young man saw the awkward figure of an overgrown
+boy, who had followed them at a distance, on the other side of the
+street, keeping the trunks of trees between them and him. This clumsy
+figure, upon which a suit of good clothes and a new cap looked strangely
+out of place, was Bog.
+
+The boy Bog was often seen lounging about the neighborhood of Miss
+Pillbody's school; and if the policeman on that beat had not known him
+to be an honest lad from childhood, he would have watched him as a
+suspicious character. From whatever part of the city Bog came home after
+a bill-posting expedition, he invariably made a circuit past Miss
+Pillbody's school, keeping the other side of the street always, and
+never looking at the house. He walked hurriedly by, but came to a sudden
+stop at a grocery store halfway up the second block beyond, and there he
+would stand, partly covered by an awning post, and look strangely
+around, letting his eyes fall occasionally, and as if by accident, on
+that house. If his object in these singular manoeuvres was to see Miss
+Minford, he always failed to improve the opportunity when it offered;
+for, as surely as Pet came out from the school, or turned into the
+street to go toward it, so surely did the boy Bog walk off whistling in
+another direction. Nobody can understand the motives of Bog's conduct,
+except those who have done the same thing in their youthful days.
+
+On this eventful afternoon (eventful as a starting point in a history of
+sorrows), Bog had taken his usual circuitous route home from a
+profitable professional tour on the east side of town. Reaching the
+grocery store, he sheltered himself behind the friendly post, and
+commenced looking up and down the street, and across the way, and into
+the sky, always winding up his mysterious observations by a single
+glance at Miss Pillbody's front door. When Pet came out, after her
+musical exercise, the boy Bog flushed up a little, turned upon his
+heels, and walked quickly away. He had not gone a dozen steps, before
+the shouts of the workmen and the sound of the first falling board
+reached his ears. He suddenly turned about, and saw a young man catching
+the next board that fell. His first impulse was to run to Pet's
+assistance; but a fatal spell chained his feet.
+
+Poor Bog had dreamed a thousand times, by night and by day, of the
+ineffable bliss of rescuing Pet from a mad dog, from a runaway horse,
+from the assault of ruffians, from drowning, from a burning building. He
+had his plans all laid for doing every one of these things. He would
+have coveted the pleasure of whipping three times his weight of any
+well-dressed, white-handed young men, who should presume to insult her.
+In imagination, he had done it times without number; and had contrived a
+private method to double up a number of effeminate antagonists in
+succession. But, in all his reveries, he had never anticipated peril to
+Miss Minford from a falling board; nor had it occurred to him that the
+supreme felicity of saving her from death or injury would ever be the
+lot of anybody else.
+
+The entire novelty of the accident and rescue struck him with amazement,
+and fastened him to the spot long enough to see that Pet walked away
+apparently unhurt. Hardly knowing what he did, or why he did it, he
+shifted his body behind the awning post so as continually to keep
+himself out of Pet's sight. Then the strong conviction came upon him
+that it was his duty to escort Pet home; for, although she did not seem
+to be hurt, she might be. This conviction was met and almost put down by
+the thought that Pet would know he had been watching for her; and he
+could not bear that. While he was halting and sweating between these two
+opinions, the unknown young man had finished his little colloquy with
+the four carpenters, and, by walking fast, had caught up with Pet.
+
+Then the boy Bog decided that his wisest course, under all the
+circumstances, would be to follow the couple at a distance, and see that
+no harm came to her from the young man.
+
+"If the feller insults her," murmured Bog, "just because he was lucky
+enough to do her a little bit of a kindness, I'll lick him till he's
+blue." Besides whipping him for the insults which he might offer, Bog
+felt that he could give him a few good blows for his impudence in
+assuming Bog's exclusive prerogative of rescuing that particular
+young girl.
+
+Bog looked very sheepish as he sneaked from one street corner to
+another, and skulked in shadows to avoid observation, though he tried to
+flatter himself that he was doing something highly meritorious. Two or
+three times, when the unknown young man inclined his head toward Pet, as
+if to speak to her, Bog entertained a hope that she would command him to
+leave her, and that he wouldn't. A single gesture from her, an impatient
+shrug of the shoulders, a turning away of her head, would have been all
+the hint that Bog needed to fly to her relief, and make up for his lost
+opportunity by knocking his dandy rival into the gutter.
+
+But not even Bog's sharp eyes could detect any impudent familiarity in
+the young man's conduct, or any desire on the part of Pet to get rid of
+him. "Everything is agin' me," said Bog, wiping the perspiration from
+his forehead.
+
+When Bog saw Pet part from the young man at Mr. Minford's door, his
+first wild idea was to call on her, quite by accident, in the course of
+half an hour. Perhaps she would tell him--as a piece of startling
+news--about her narrow escape from the board, and what the young man
+said to her. But Bog was unequal to the dissimulation involved in this
+plan, and abandoned it. Then he had a notion of following the young man,
+and seeing what became of him. But a sudden and very decided rising of
+fresh blood to Bog's cheeks and ears told him that he had played the
+part of spy long enough. So Bog determined--as many grown-up people in
+graver dilemmas do--to go home to supper.
+
+Bog found his supper all ready for him, and it was a good one. For his
+aunt, although the victim of a chronic rheumatism, had contrived to
+preserve a sharp appetite from the wreck of her former health, and
+cooked three meals for herself and two for Bog (who was never home at
+noon) daily. She was singularly punctual, too. Breakfast was always
+smoking hot on the table at 6 A.M.; and supper (and dinner combined, for
+Bog) was never a minute behind 5 P.M. in the winter time. Bog, who had a
+truly boyish idea of feminine excellencies, considered that this knack
+of cooking, and this amazing punctuality, were more than an offset for
+his aunt's little infirmities of temper, and her everlasting discourse
+on the rheumatics.
+
+Though the beef hash was good, and the toast nicely browned and
+buttered, and the tea strong, and the fire burning brightly through the
+grates of the stove, and the curtains snugly drawn, and everything
+cheerful and comfortable in Bog's humble home, the boy was unhappy, and
+could not eat.
+
+Happily, his aunt was so engrossed with her own physical troubles, that
+she never noticed indications of ill health in other people. She held
+that every other human ailment was unworthy of mention in the presence
+of her sovereign affliction. Whenever anybody presumed to speak of their
+little personal sufferings before her, she said: "You should thank
+Heaven you haven't got the rheumatics," and would then proceed to give a
+circumstantial history of her acquaintance with that disease. Therefore,
+on this occasion, she was quite unaware that poor Bog sat opposite to
+her with a pale, dejected face, playing aimlessly on his plate with his
+knife and fork. She thought only, and talked only, of her malady, which
+had been pranking in the oddest manner all day, and had settled, at
+last, in her "limbs." Bog's aunt had no legs that she would own to.
+
+After supper, Bog heaved a sigh, and said that he would go round to
+Uncle Ith's; and asked his aunt if she had any word to send by him.
+
+"Oh, no; nothing partickler," said she. "He don't care about me."
+
+Uncle Ith, as everybody called him, was Bog's uncle on his mother's
+side. Uncle Ith and the aunt had a standing difference touching that
+rheumatism. Whenever they met--which was rarely--Uncle Ith would ask
+her, with a wink, how she was; and when she candidly told him that she
+was in a dreadful state, he would laugh at her, and say that half of it
+was "imagination." This indignity he had repeated so often, that,
+latterly, she scorned to complain in his presence, and bore her anguish
+in noble silence.
+
+"All right," said Bog, who took no part in these family differences. He
+put on his cap, and left the house.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+UP IN THE AIR.
+
+"Uncle Ith" was one of the city bellringers, and lived at the top of a
+tower a hundred feet high, which vibrated with every stroke of the great
+bell hanging midway between his airy perch and the ground. He was sixty
+years of age, and had white hair, but he was as strong as younger men,
+and could swing the clapper against the side of the great bell with a
+boom that could be heard across rivers, and far into the peaceful
+country, on quiet nights. His eyes were so sharp, that, without the aid
+of a glass, he could read names on the paddle boxes of steamboats, where
+the unassisted vision of most persons descried nothing but a blur. He
+had done duty on that tower during the six years since it was built; and
+he knew the section of the city which lay spread out beneath him as a
+man knows his own garden. In the daytime, he could always guess, within
+a street or two, the location of any fire in his district. He knew all
+the smokes from a hundred factories, foundries, distilleries, and never
+confounded them with the fires which it was his business to detect. The
+presence of a new and suspicious smoke among the black stretch of roofs,
+caught his eye instantly; and he could tell in a moment, by its color,
+its speed of ascent, and the quantity of sparks accompanying it, whether
+it came from a carpenter's shop, a stable, a distillery, a camphene and
+oil store, or some other kind of building. In the nighttime, he knew the
+lights which mapped out the squares and the streets within his range of
+observation, almost as well as the astronomer knows the other lights
+that shine down upon the sleeping city from the heavens. He could fix
+the position of a fire by night rather better than by day, because he
+had the red reflection of the flames on well-known steeples, and high,
+prominent roofs to guide him.
+
+Such were Uncle Ith's qualifications for his place; and he was so loved
+and trusted by the firemen of his district, that no mayor, however beset
+by applicants for office, had ever dreamed of removing him. In all of
+Uncle Ith's limited relations with the world, he was esteemed an honest
+man; and his word would have possessed the literal novelty of being as
+good as his note, had necessity ever required him to borrow money. But
+Uncle Ith was frugal, and made his small salary suffice for himself and
+a family of seven motherless children.
+
+He had one eccentricity--a complete indifference to newspapers. He never
+bought nor borrowed them. "What's the use of reading 'em?" he would say.
+"Why not imagine the murders, suicides, political meetings, and other
+trash that fills 'em, and save your money for terbacker?" This did Uncle
+Ith, and he flattered himself that it was wisely done.
+
+The bell tower was not far from the boy's home, and in a few minutes he
+stood at the foot of it, and shouted to Uncle Ith: "Hallo, there!"
+
+Uncle Ith, always on the alert for calls, poked his head out of the
+window, which he left partly open for ventilation in the coldest nights,
+and answered, rather gruffly, "Well, what's wanted?" He never allowed
+his own children, nor any persons except his nephew Bog, and a few old
+firemen, friends of his, to visit him in the tower at night. Uncle Ith
+was conscientious. The presence of his children, with whom he loved to
+converse, or that of strangers, who would stare vacantly all over the
+lighted city, and ask innumerable questions, interfered with the
+strictness of his watch. Uncle Ith was a little eccentric, too, in his
+devotion to duty.
+
+"It's me, uncle," said Bog, screaming upward.
+
+"Glad to see you, Bog. You can come up," shouted the old man in return.
+He slung a latch key, fastened to a string, out of the window. It slid
+down the side of the tower, into Bog's hand. He unlocked the door, and
+the next moment the key was jerked aloft. The boy entered the base of
+the tower. He was so familiar with every crook and passage, that the
+small light of a gas jet, inside, was not necessary to show him the way.
+Up he ran, sometimes clearing two steps at a jump, slipping his hand
+lightly along the rough wooden banister. A few spiral turns brought him
+to the bell, which hung in an open framework of timber. He gave the huge
+bronze a familiar tap as he passed, and wound on and upward until he
+came to a trap door, which Uncle Ith held invitingly open. Then he
+sprang into the little room at the top of the tower, and Uncle Ith shook
+him by the hand.
+
+"You look well, I see, Bog. And how is your aunt?" Uncle Ith was mindful
+of the usages of society, and always asked after her.
+
+"Oh, she's smart," said Bog, totally oblivious of her rheumatism, "and
+sent her love to ye." Bog was a peacemaker.
+
+"Sent her rheumatism, I guess yer mean. No doubt she wishes I had it."
+
+Bog laughed, and his uncle laughed. And then his uncle, never forgetting
+duty, took a sharp look out of the eight clearly polished windows that
+commanded a view of the surrounding district. Discovering no sign of
+fire, he resumed the conversation with his nephew, asking him about his
+business (which he was happy to learn was prosperous), and giving him a
+quantity of good advice which none but a genius could remember, or an
+angel follow. During these exhortations, Uncle Ith paced to and fro in
+the little room, looking out of some window at the end of every
+sentence. Bog sat on a three-legged stool (the only seat except a
+backless chair) by the side of a miniature stove, on whose top hissed
+the kettle, from which Uncle Ith made his pot of coffee at midnight.
+
+The night was cold; the little fire was warm; and Bog liked to hear
+advice from his uncle; but his eyes would wander to a certain window, as
+if, for some reason, he would derive great pleasure in opening and
+looking out of it. This movement of his eyes was so frequent, that Uncle
+Ith observed it, and said:
+
+"Ah, I see! You want to stare out of that southeast window again. Now, I
+think the sight is handsomer to the west, where you can see the lights
+of Jersey City and Hoboken, and on the ferry boats and the shipping
+anchored in North River. But that's a matter o' taste. Well, look out o'
+the window, if you want to. I guess I can trust you for fires in
+that quarter."
+
+"That you may!" answered Bog, throwing open the southeast window.
+
+The stars above twinkled crisply in the frosty air; and the sky, with
+its low horizon on every side, seemed infinitely vaster than it did to
+Bog in the narrow and high-walled streets of the city. But Bog, though
+he used to puzzle over the wonders of the heavens when he was a few
+years younger, and had picked up a little something of astronomy from
+his uncle Ith (who knew something of that as of many other sciences),
+did not turn his gaze to them. Nor did he give more than a sweeping
+glance at the dotted line of lights below, stretching out in long
+perspectives, until the two luminous points at the end seemed blended
+into one. There were several parks in sight, which looked like portions
+of the sky let down on the earth, in all but the mathematical regularity
+of their mock stars. But Bog's eyes passed them by. To an inquisitive
+mind, there was something of interest to be seen and speculated over, in
+the lighted windows of houses all about him. People could be seen eating
+their late suppers, rocking by the fire, playing the piano, dancing,
+taking a rubber at whist or euchre, or diverting themselves with other
+recreations of winter house life. In one upper chamber, a physician was
+presenting a child just born to the proud father. In another, there was
+a mysterious spectacle, which a closer examination might have proved to
+be the preparing of a dead body for the morrow's burial. But Bog saw
+none of these sights.
+
+His eyes sought for, and found immediately, as if by instinct, one
+light, which, in his opinion, was the only one worth looking at on earth
+or sky. It was a single bright gas jet, burning very close to a window
+about six hundred feet distant from him in an air line. Several tall
+chimneys of intervening houses rose almost between him and this light,
+and, perhaps, their dark, spectral shapes aided him in identifying it so
+readily. The lower sash of the window through which the light shone was
+curtained, but the upper part was uncovered; and an observer on the
+tower, being fifty or sixty feet above the top of the curtain, could
+easily look into the room. Bog rubbed his eyes, into which the cold but
+not biting wind had brought the tears, and gazed anxiously into Mr.
+Minford's apartment.
+
+The pale inventor stood a few feet from the window, attentively
+examining a mass of machinery before him, upon which the light shone
+strongly. Only the tops of the wheels and of the more complex parts were
+visible; but there was one lever, or bar, connected with it, which rose
+above the whole, and could be seen by Bog to the extent of at least two
+feet. This was an addition to the strange machine as Bog had last seen
+it, and he contemplated it with fearful interest.
+
+Mr. Minford stood motionless for five minutes in the presence of his
+creation. He was ghostlike and frightful in that fixed attitude, and Bog
+wished that he would move. He did so, nodding his head, and smiling, as
+he bent down and detached some part of the machine. All but his head and
+his right shoulder then disappeared from view; but Bog knew, by the
+vibrating motion of his shoulder blade, that he was filing upon
+something. Mr. Minford then stooped again, as if to put the part of the
+machine back into its proper place. Having done this, he stood erect
+once more, folded his arms, and looked intently at the Mystery for the
+second time.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+TONGUES OF FIRE.
+
+But now Bog's attention was diverted from Mr. Minford, and his heart was
+made to beat more rapidly by a new sight. While he had kept both eyes
+closely fixed upon the inventor, he had looked with an oblique, or
+reflected vision, into the other window of the room. This window was
+uncurtained, and Bog could distinctly see the chairs, bureau, and other
+articles of furniture. A new light (so Bog oddly thought) was suddenly
+irradiated through the darker portion of the apartment by the entrance
+of Pet from the hall. She had no bonnet on; and Bog reasoned (if he
+could be said to reason in his excited state) that she had been spending
+a part of the evening, as was often her wont, with a poor family, rich
+in children, who lived on the floor below. Her father smiled upon the
+problem before him, as a new difficulty melted away under his burning
+gaze. Then he turned, and smiled at Pet. She ran toward him, and he
+kissed her tenderly. Bog was devouring this little episode with open
+mouth and eyes, when the hoarse voice of Uncle Ith broke in upon the
+enchantment:
+
+"Hallo! there's a fire."
+
+"What! Where?" shouted Bog, forgetting where he was.
+
+"Why, you blind man!" said Uncle Ith; "straight afore ye. Don't ye see
+it breaking out?"
+
+Bog cast his eyes about him wildly; and, sure enough, directly in the
+range of Mr. Minford's house, but four or five blocks beyond, there was
+an illuminated streak of smoke curling up from a roof.
+
+"It's in my district!" cried Uncle Ith. "So here goes." He seized the
+long iron lever near him, by which the enormous clapper of the bell was
+swung, and moved it like the handle of a pump. The second motion was
+followed by a hoarse sound, which shook the tower to its foundations,
+and started into listening attitudes a thousand firemen in their engine
+or hose houses, in the streets, at the theatres, or at their own homes.
+
+"Sha'n't I help you?" asked Bog, who always proffered his services on
+these occasions.
+
+"Pooh! no. It's baby play for me." By this time Uncle Ith had evoked the
+second gruff note from the deep throat of the imprisoned monster below.
+Then came a third in quicker succession, and louder, as if the bell had
+warmed up to the work, and then other notes, until the district had been
+struck; and then the bell, as if rejoicing in its strength to resist
+blows, murmured plaintively for a repetition of them. Long before this
+sad sound had died away, the deep bass of the City Hall bell, the shrill
+tenor of the Post Office bell, and the intermediate pitches of the bells
+all over the city, had taken up the chorus of alarm. There was a rattle
+of engines, hose carriages, and hook-and-ladder trucks through the
+streets. There was a frantic rush of men and boys, some with cumbrous
+fire-caps on their heads, and putting on their coats as they ran. How
+they knew the location of the fire, none could guess, for it had not yet
+streamed out against the sky; but know it they did; and the dove goes to
+its cote not more directly than they centred from all parts of the
+district upon the exact spot of the fire. Meanwhile, Uncle Ith lashed
+his mighty instrument into a sonorous fury; and all the other bells
+played their echo, even to the far-away tinkler on Mount Morris, which,
+having few fires in its own neighborhood to report, took a pleasure in
+telling its little world of those which were raging down town.
+
+For the information of his uncle, and to atone in part for his previous
+neglect, Bog devoted only a half eye to the Minford family, and kept the
+rest of his optics on the fire. Just after its discovery, the smoke had
+loomed up dense and black, as if it were trying to suffocate the flames
+beneath. Then it changed rapidly to a light blue, and was chased faster
+upward by two tongues of fire. These tongues leaped aloft with a sudden
+impulse, and shed a revelation of light over acres of houses, and
+brought out church steeples in vivid relief against the sky, and put a
+new gilding on storm-beat en vanes and weathercocks. All this Bog
+described in his own way to his uncle; and his uncle, stooping at the
+lever, kept on ringing with unabated zeal; and all the other bells
+banged away like an orchestra of which Uncle Ith was the leader.
+
+Then Bog saw the forms of men suddenly spring into sight, as if out of
+the very roof, between the two fiery tongues. The tongues licked the air
+about them with savage whirls; but the brave fellows dodged back, and
+were unhurt. Then, advancing boldly again, they released their hands
+from something which they had been holding, and lo! four jets of water
+struck at the very roots of the flames, tripped at them, and made them
+stagger, drove them twice into the roof, and caught them with deadly
+accuracy as they came out again; and, in less than five minutes, changed
+all their brave splendor to dull, black smoke, and set the victor's mark
+upon them--the column of white steam which arises from the half-quenched
+embers, and proclaims that the fire is put out of mischief at last.
+
+"Nothing but a kind o' white smoke, now," said Bog.
+
+Uncle Ith, who had just rung the last stroke of a round, relinquished
+the lever, and looked over the shoulder of his nephew. "The fire's out,"
+said he. "When you see the steam comin' up that way, you may know that
+the water has whipped." The old man then seated himself in the backless
+chair, produced a short black pipe from a crossbeam overhead, and
+rewarded himself with a few long puffs.
+
+When Uncle Ith had a pipe in his mouth, he became didactic, and he
+therefore proceeded to renew his donations of valuable advice to his
+nephew, who was still looking hard out of the southeast window.
+
+Bog cocked his head on one side, to make a show of listening, and said
+"Yes, sir," now and then, which was all that his uncle expected of him.
+But his whole mind, and his heart, were in the little double-windowed
+room, where Pet was now practising upon the piano. Through the
+uncurtained glass, Bog could see her hands weaving music with the keys,
+and almost fancy he could hear it. The inventor bent over his machine,
+and plied the hammer, the chisel, and the file, on various parts of it.
+Now and then he would pause, stand erect, and look proudly toward his
+child, and keep time to her music with inclinations of his head. Bog,
+without knowing it, would do the same thing.
+
+While the boy was gloating over this scene, unconscious of the swift
+passage of time, the clock on the nearest church struck nine. Bog
+sighed, for he knew that that was Pet's hour for bed. Sure enough. Her
+little hands shut up the piano, and neatly smoothed down the cloth over
+it. Then she lit a candle, ran up to her father and kissed him, and in a
+moment was lost from Bog's sight in her chamber. As she disappeared, the
+boy's lips murmured "Good-night" with a fervor which made that simple
+colloquial phrase both a prayer and a blessing.
+
+When Pet had gone, Bog suddenly found that the night had become cold,
+and that he was beginning to shiver. So he shut the southeast window,
+and took a seat by the fire to warm himself before going home.
+
+
+
+BOOK FOURTH.
+
+CHILDREN OF THE WORLD.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+MYNDERT VAN QUINTEM AND SON.
+
+One morning, when Marcus Wilkeson returned home from a ramble, he found
+his half-sister Philomela violently dusting the furniture and books of
+the snug little back parlor. The air was full of dancing motes, which
+looked large and suffocating in the sunshine. Marcus had politely
+requested his sister, fifty times at least, _not_ to molest that
+sanctuary of meditation oftener than once a fortnight. To which she
+always replied: "I suppose you great lazy fellows would like to have the
+cobwebs grow on you. But you sha'n't, while I am in the house." Then,
+with a few dexterous flourishes of her cloth, she would start the dust
+up in a cloud.
+
+On this morning, Marcus Wilkeson, being in the most tolerant of moods,
+merely said "Whew!" and took a seat by his favorite window, the lower
+sash of which he threw wide open, with the vain hope that some of the
+dust would blow out. Miss Philomela smiled at this act so as to be seen
+by him. But he did not appear to notice it. Then she whisked her cloth
+under his very nose, as if to challenge objections. After this
+aggravation had been repeated three or four times, Marcus felt compelled
+to make a mild protest.
+
+"Great deal of dust, sister," he said, stating what he presumed would
+not be contradicted.
+
+"Is there?" replied Miss Philomela, exulting in the success of her
+stratagem. "_I_ didn't notice it; nor would you, if you had some
+business to look after, like other people, instead of stopping in the
+house all day."
+
+Marcus had heard that argument and triumphantly put it down so often,
+that he did not think it worth another word. Consequently he
+said nothing.
+
+This obstinate silence galled Miss Philomela; and, after waiting full
+three minutes to see if Marcus would not answer, and meanwhile dusting
+prodigiously in his neighborhood, she said:
+
+"Well, it's some gratification to know that you do not have the
+hardihood to defend yourself. You are well aware that nothing can
+justify a healthy, middle-aged man--I may say, a young one--in retiring
+from active life and society, and becoming a great lazy mope."
+
+"I'm really too lazy to discuss it now," replied Marcus, smiling, and
+filling his meerschaum from the tobacco pouch which hung conveniently at
+the window's side.
+
+Philomela regarded him for a moment with an expression of pity and
+horror. Then she heaved a sigh, and muttered something about
+misapplied talents.
+
+"You had better say, 'Misapplied brooms and dusters,'" retorted her
+half-brother. "I should be perfectly happy now, but for this
+confounded dust."
+
+"Laugh away. I know you despise my sisterly advice. But you can never
+say that I have not done my duty--"
+
+"To the furniture, most assuredly," interrupted Marcus.
+
+Miss Philomela Wilkeson heaved another sigh in the best style of
+martyrdom, and precipitately left the room, followed by her brother's
+cheerful, rattling laugh.
+
+"A good old girl enough," said Marcus to himself, "but for her
+well-meaning and strictly conscientious habit of making people
+miserable."
+
+Then he lighted his meerschaum, closed the window, squared his chair in
+front of it, and looked out. His face instantly flushed with pleasure at
+a strange sight. The blinds of the lower parlor windows across the way,
+which had been shut for several weeks, were now thrown open, and the
+white-haired old gentleman, looking thin and pale, sat in his armchair
+in his old place, and was gazing at him. At least so Marcus thought; but
+he hesitated to bow until the old gentleman gave a distinct salutation.
+Marcus returned it two or three times with emphasis, as if to express
+his great pleasure at seeing his unknown neighbor and friend again. He
+blushed as he did so, for he was conscious of wilful neglect and cruel
+indifference, in not having called upon him on New Year's day, or since
+then, during the period of the closed blinds; and worse still, in not
+having thought of him a dozen times, though he had taken the trouble to
+pass his door on his way to or from Mr. Minford's, and had felt relieved
+to see no black crape on the bell-pull.
+
+"But then," thought Marcus, pleading with and for himself, "my mind has
+been occupied--very much occupied--- with other matters. Now, if he
+beckons to me again, I will go over to him without a moment's delay. My
+old friend looks very sick and unhappy."
+
+Just then the old gentleman reached out his thin white hand, as if the
+motion required an effort, and beckoned twice. Marcus answered with two
+bows, and immediately rose, and laid down his pipe on the window sill,
+thereby implying that he would come over at once. The old gentleman
+smiled faintly, to express his delight.
+
+In a few minutes Marcus Wilkeson stood at the antique mansion, and
+pulled the bell. It vibrated feebly as if it shared with the house and
+its owner the infirmities of age. The bell was answered by an old,
+neatly dressed female servant. She had been told to admit the caller
+instantly, and said, "Mr. Van Quintem will see you, sir."
+
+He entered a wide hallway, and followed the noiseless step of the
+servant, trying to remember, without success, where he had heard the
+name of Van Quintem.
+
+At the end of the hall the servant opened a door, and ushered him into a
+room decorated at the edges of the ceiling with heavy wooden carvings,
+and furnished in the style of the last century. The old gentleman partly
+rose from his soft armchair, supported himself by one hand on it, and
+extended the other to his visitor.
+
+"My name is Myndert Van Quintem, sir," said he, "and I am very glad to
+see you." There was a pleasant smile in the old gentleman's pale face,
+and a warmth in the grasp of his thin right hand, that attested the
+sincerity of his words.
+
+"And my name is Marcus Wilkeson, sir; and I am truly happy to make your
+acquaintance," responded the visitor, in his most genial manner.
+
+The old gentleman here showed symptoms of faintness from the exertion of
+standing; and Marcus, taking him by the arm, forced him gently into his
+easy chair, and took a seat beside him.
+
+"I must apologize for not having called before," said Marcus. "I--"
+
+"Not a word, sir," interrupted the old gentleman. "It is I who must
+apologize for the rudeness of nodding and beckoning to a perfect
+stranger. But the fact was, I could not regard you as a stranger. Seeing
+you at your window, smoking and reading, day after day, while I was
+smoking and musing at mine, I gradually came to sympathize with you, and
+to wish that the distance across the lots was short enough to allow us
+to converse. I thought, perhaps, that on some subjects we might interest
+each other. Now, be good enough to fill that pipe and smoke it, while I
+tell you in few words who I am."
+
+He pointed to a meerschaum, carved into the semblance of a Dutchman's
+head, which looked not unlike his own. It was fitted to a long Turkish
+stem, and hung against the wall by a silver chain, within reach of his
+hand. Five other pipes of quaint design hung near it.
+
+Marcus protested against smoking in an invalid's presence; but the old
+gentleman insisted upon it, and playfully but firmly threatened to smoke
+the pipe himself if his guest did not. So Marcus filled the large bowl
+from a paper of old, mild tobacco, which hung in a pouch near it, and
+drew a few gentle whiffs, intending to let the pipe go out. But the old
+gentleman watched him.
+
+"'Twon't do," said he. "That old pipe of mine is not used to neglect. As
+a particular favor, now, I beg that you'll smoke, and puff out clouds,
+as I have often seen you do across the way."
+
+Marcus protested again, but the old gentleman stubbornly maintained his
+point; and it was not till the pungent smoke began to curl upward, that
+he proceeded with his personal disclosure.
+
+"Have you ever heard my name before, Mr. Wilkeson?" said he.
+
+Marcus bowed, and said that he had not had that pleasure.
+
+"Of course not," returned the old gentleman, not displeased with the
+answer. "I have taken infinite pains to keep out of public life since I
+retired from business, twenty-five years ago. Even before that time, I
+was known only to a very few persons as a silent partner in the large
+iron-importing house of Sniggs, Buffet & Co. I had no relations, and few
+friends, in the common acceptance of that much-abused word. My only
+happiness was in my wife--that is her picture hanging over the
+mantelpiece--and this house, which my father built, and which, according
+to a tradition in our family, is on or near the spot where my
+great-great-grandfather, the fourth Myndert Van Quintem, perished by the
+hands of the Indians."
+
+"Then," interrupted Marcus, "you belong to an old Dutch family?"
+
+"To one of the oldest on record," replied Mr. Van Quintem. "My great
+ancestor, the genuine original Myndert, came over as cook with Hendrik
+Hudson. We have an iron spoon of doubtful authenticity, said to have
+descended from him. Sometimes I have paid the penalty of this ancient
+and distinguished origin, by receiving stupid compliments on my old
+Dutch blood, as if that species of blood were better than any other.
+That sort of nonsense I have always answered by informing the flatterer
+that the first bearer of my venerable name was a cook; the second, a
+tanner; the third--well, the least said about the third the better; and
+the fourth, a barber. My grandfather, a very worthy saddler, in old
+Queen's street, was the first of the series that was ever able to buy
+and hold real estate. My father increased upon his purchases, and, when
+the property came into my possession, I, in turn, added to its extent as
+fast as I could. In forty years, this property has become valuable; and
+I now find myself and my lots occupying a large space on the tax rolls.
+
+"It is a curious fact, and illustrates the uncertainty of human events,
+that my success is the result of accident, and is not in the least due
+to my judgment or foresight. Every kind of business that I have engaged
+in--and I have tried several kinds--has failed. Sniggs, Buffet & Co.
+almost finished me; and, if I had not backed out as I did, the better
+part of my estate would have been sacrificed. Among those who know me, I
+pass for a very shrewd business man, who has made a fortune by his
+numerous failures. This tribute to my abilities is flattering, but I
+must disclaim it. But I am tiring you with these petty details of
+my life."
+
+"Not at all, really," said Marcus Wilkeson, who enjoyed the old
+gentleman's frankness.
+
+Mr. Van Quintem paused, and began to show signs of fatigue. He asked for
+a cordial which stood on an old sideboard with great lion's feet, near
+his visitor's chair. Having sipped of its contents, he expressed himself
+relieved, and resumed his story:
+
+"As I was saying, I found my whole happiness in my wife, and in this
+house. With the exception of a few friends of my youth--now all
+dead--she was my only society. Like me, she was fond of retirement and
+of books. You, sir, can appreciate the quiet, satisfying pleasure which
+we derived from books, for you, too, are a constant, happy reader; and
+you have fine books, as I know by the size of them. You see, I have been
+observing you closely," he added, with a smile. The old gentleman's
+smile was sweet, but relapsed into a mild expression of sadness.
+
+"Not more closely than I have observed you," said Marcus. "I have often
+wondered what stout old quartos you were reading. To tell you the truth,
+I inferred, from the dimensions of the books and your white cravat, that
+you were a clergyman." Marcus might have added, that the old gentleman's
+flowing white locks and benevolent features had contributed to the
+illusion; but he had already discovered that Mr. Van Quintem, like
+himself, was averse to compliments.
+
+The old gentleman took the remark good-naturedly. "This is not the first
+time," said he, "that my old-fashioned fancy for a white cravat has led
+to that mistake. You will find very little of the body of divinity in
+that library. When I recover from this illness so as to hobble about, we
+will look over my little collection together."
+
+Marcus said that nothing could give him greater delight, unless it was
+to show his friend his own humble library.
+
+"Thank you," returned Mr. Van Quintem; "and I promise to run over and
+look at it when I am well enough to go out." The haste with which the
+old gentleman made the last remark, and the fact that he did not invite
+his visitor to examine the library then and there, led Marcus to think
+that the old gentleman had some private trouble on his mind, which he
+wished to diminish by imparting to another. Marcus was right.
+
+The old gentleman heaved a sigh, and resumed:
+
+"For ten years after my retirement, my wife and I lived on in the calm,
+happy manner that I have described. We had no griefs--not even that one
+which most commonly afflicts parents, the loss of children. Yet I
+sometimes think, sir, that it would be far better for some children to
+die in their youth and innocence, than to grow up and become bad men,
+and torture and almost kill their parents with ingratitude and
+unkindness." Marcus guessed what was to come.
+
+"We had but one child--a boy--born long after I had given up all hopes
+of having an heir. I need not tell you, sir, what a joy he was to us in
+his infancy; for you, too, I presume, are a husband and a father."
+
+Marcus replied confusedly, and as if it were something to be ashamed of,
+that he was neither the one nor the other, though he hoped some day
+(here he was exceedingly awkward) to be both.
+
+The old gentleman was so wrapped up in his own thoughts, that he did not
+seem to notice the reply. He again braced himself in the chair, as if he
+would, by that act, gather strength to proceed.
+
+"Of course, I called the child Myndert. He was the seventh of that name;
+and I used to think, even when he was a toddling little baby, what plans
+of education would be best suited to develop his talents. I know that a
+parent's partiality is a magnifying glass of high power; but, to the
+best of my belief, he was a most precocious child. I think so now, as I
+look back upon the days of his prattling innocence.
+
+"After a great deal of debating, my wife and I concluded to make a
+lawyer of him. He was to be the first lawyer in our family annals; and
+we fondly pictured to ourselves that he would become an eminent judge,
+or that he would step from the bar into political life, and shed honor
+upon his country and his family as a statesman. I know how ridiculous
+these imaginings must seem to you, and I recall them only to show you
+how deeply our hearts were wrapped up in that boy.
+
+"When our little Myndert was five years old, my wife died." Here the old
+gentleman clutched the arms of the chair firmly with both hands. "Our
+son had been very sick for a week before, and my dear Clara had nearly
+worn herself out watching over and nursing him. A severe cold, which she
+caught while going to the druggist's in a rain, did the rest. She died
+with one arm around me and the other around little Myndert; and her
+last words were a blessing on the boy, and a request that I would always
+love him for her sake." The old gentleman's eyes glistened with tears,
+and his lips twitched convulsively. Marcus evinced his sympathy in the
+fittest way, by keeping silence, and fixing his eyes on the floor.
+
+"Well, sir, not to be tedious, I lavished my whole heart upon that
+child. His presence seemed to be some consolation for the great loss I
+had sustained. His features were so like hers, in all except the eyes,
+that I seemed to see her through him; and thus, in a peculiar sense, I
+loved him for her sake, indeed. He was petted and caressed from his very
+cradle. Ah, there was my error; but who can blame a father for
+over-loving his only son, and that one motherless!
+
+"He early showed indications of a fierce temper and a sullen pride, in
+which respects he resembled not his mother, but her father, who, with
+the exception of these two faults, was a good and just man. I have heard
+of cases in which strong mental traits jump over a generation, and
+appear in the next one. I thought, and still think, that my son's
+singular peculiarities might be explained in that way. If you will bear
+with me, sir, I will give you some illustrations of his character.
+
+"When he was nine years of age, a dear friend, now dead, advised me not
+to injure so precocious an intellect by too much cultivation, but to put
+the boy on a farm, where he could divide his time between healthful work
+and youthful sports, and would be kept away from the contaminating
+influences of the city, I agreed to make the experiment, though
+reluctantly, for I could not bear the thought of parting with my child.
+An old family acquaintance who owned a farm in Dutchess County, and had
+no children, was willing to take my boy.
+
+"Little Myndert liked the idea of going into the country, and for two
+weeks he behaved very well; and his acting father wrote me, that if I
+could spare the boy, he would like to adopt him as his own. But the next
+letter, a week afterward, brought a different story. It was while
+Myndert was not put to work, that he behaved so well. But when the
+farmer gave him a little hoe, and asked him to grub up a few weeds in
+the garden, the lad threw it down, and said to the farmer, 'I hate you.'
+This was his favorite expression to those who aroused his displeasure
+when a child. The good man was astonished at this insubordination, and
+tried to persuade Myndert to do as he was told. But persuasion was
+useless; and so were the threats with which the farmer tried to frighten
+him. As for whipping the boy, he was, like me, too soft-hearted to
+do that.
+
+"So Myndert became the master there, as he had been here. His real
+nature now came out. From that time until the worthy farmer sent the boy
+home in despair--ten weeks later--he was the wonder and terror of the
+neighborhood. Chickens, goslings, and young ducks were killed; boughs of
+apple trees and other fruit trees were broken down; strawberry beds were
+entered, and the plants pulled up by the roots; the windows of the
+village church and schoolhouse were broken with stones; and three
+fourths of these acts were traced to little Myndert. He always denied
+the charges, and put on an air of innocence, which deceived
+many persons.
+
+"The cunning which he exhibited in doing these malicious acts, and
+trying to divert suspicion from himself, was truly wonderful in a child
+of his age. One day he was caught by a farmer in the act of killing some
+young chickens; and the owner was so mad, that he whipped the boy
+soundly. That very night the farmer's wood shed was set on fire from the
+outside; but a heavy rain came on, and put out the flames. The traces of
+the fire were plainly to be seen next morning; and the farmer found
+proofs enough, I fear, to have convicted my son of a felony.
+
+"My friend informed me of all these facts in a very sorrowful letter,
+and I hastened to take my son once more under my own roof.
+
+"Here I tried every method that a father's love could devise to reform
+him. But all was useless. He seemed to have no idea of truth or honor,
+of affection or duty to me. When, at times, I thought he was showing
+signs of improvement, I always found, afterward, that he was only
+concealing his mischievous acts more carefully. I call them mischievous,
+though the word 'malicious' would perhaps describe them better; for they
+were all undertaken in a spirit of evil, and not of fun." The old
+gentleman here rested, and refreshed himself with a sip of the cordial.
+
+"But it would take days to tell you of all my troubles with that boy,
+and I will briefly refer to the rest of them.
+
+"By the advice of another friend (for I have never taken any step in the
+treatment of my child without first seeking for friendly advice), I sent
+him, when twelve years of age, to a celebrated school in Massachusetts,
+where the discipline is very strict. I had a personal interview with the
+master, and requested him, as a favor, to chastise Myndert, if all other
+means failed to subdue him. Though I could not bear to whip him, I was
+willing that he should suffer a proper punishment, inflicted in the
+right spirit, from others. At this school he conducted himself properly
+for about three weeks, and was taking a high rank as a scholar, when his
+natural tastes asserted themselves, in all sorts of wicked pranks on his
+fellow pupils, on the teachers, and on people in the village. The master
+at first expostulated, and then gave Myndert a good thrashing. That
+night the master narrowly escaped being hit by a large stone thrown
+through his bedroom window. Next morning my son was missing, and for
+three weeks no trace of him could be found. I advertised in newspapers,
+describing him, and offering large rewards for his recovery. I had the
+same notice printed on bills, and stuck up all through the country. I
+employed detectives to trace out the runaway. A month passed, and no
+tidings. I was in despair. Toward the close of the fifth week, one of
+the detectives struck a trail on Cape Cod, and, after a patient search,
+found the young rascal living, under the assumed name of Carlo, with a
+fisherman, in a little seaside hamlet. As the fishing season was a good
+one, and men were scarce, the fisherman had gladly received my son as
+an apprentice for his board. The novelty, excitement, and sometimes
+danger of the pursuit pleased Myndert greatly, and the old fisherman
+said that he was a good hand for a boy. When the detective found him,
+however, he was beginning to be tired of his strange occupation (nothing
+pleases him long), and he consented to come home on condition that I
+would not scold him, and would give him plenty of pocket money. I had
+been weak enough to authorize the making of these promises.
+
+"The return of my prodigal son made me happy. As I had promised, I did
+not reproach him, and gave him all the money that he wished. He was not
+old enough to know how to spend money viciously. His tastes, though
+costly, were comparatively innocent. From childhood he had always been
+very fond of new clothes, and he indulged that passion to the utmost. At
+twelve years of age, he was called the 'Young Dandy' all through this
+part of the town; and I sometimes heard of his attracting attention
+on Broadway.
+
+"He was so well satisfied with my generosity, that he consented to
+receive two short lessons daily from tutors at the house, and surprised
+them, as he did everybody, with his wonderful aptitude for learning."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+BUYING GOOD BEHAVIOR.
+
+"For three years I bought my son's good behavior with unlimited pocket
+money, and foolishly thought that his nature had changed. Occasionally
+he would do malicious acts to his tutors, or to my housekeeper or
+servants; but these occurred less frequently as time rolled on, and at
+last ceased. At fifteen years of age, he was sufficiently advanced in
+learning to pass a college examination, and I determined to send him to
+college. He was delighted at the proposal, for he had begun now to
+appreciate the advantages of education. Anticipating that he would have
+trouble with the Faculty, I selected a college which was distinguished
+for its means of learning, and was jet very lenient in its discipline.
+Myndert easily obtained admission, and at once took high rank in his
+class. Knowledge came so easy to him, that he had plenty of leisure, and
+I feared that his old vicious habits would break out again. Greatly did
+I rejoice not to hear a single complaint of him during his first term.
+But, alas! I found, when he returned home, that he had learned to drink
+and gamble, and that the large sums of money I had sent him had been
+squandered in carousals, and over the card table. Still he maintained
+the first position in his class, and of that I was proud.
+
+"I remonstrated against his vices. He admitted that there was some truth
+in what I had heard, mixed up with a great deal of exaggeration; and
+justified his conduct by saying that it was the fashion, and he could
+not keep out of it if he would. His good health and naturally high
+spirits did not appear to be in the least affected by dissipation, and I
+gladly allowed myself to believe that many of the reports about him
+were false.
+
+"The next term was still more expensive; and I found out that the larger
+portion of my heavy outlay went for liquor and gambling. Still he kept a
+high grade in his class--taking the second rank instead of the first;
+and the Faculty either were ignorant of his misconduct, or did not think
+it worth punishing. Through his first, second, and third years at
+college, these were his only vices. His constitution, though strong, was
+gradually undermined; and, at the end of his junior year, he showed
+unmistakable signs of bloating, became very irregular in his attendance
+on recitations, and had sunk to be the fifteenth in his class. I had
+hopes that he would pass through his fourth year safely, and get a
+diploma. But, at the very beginning of that year, he kept drunk, and
+absented himself from recitations for a fortnight, and, when called
+before the Faculty for a mild reprimand, cursed them with the most
+horrible oaths, defied them, and left their presence. They had no
+choice but to expel him from the college; and, a week after, he was
+brought home to me nearly dead with intoxication.
+
+"A month's illness followed, which brought him almost to the grave.
+Though, at the time, I prayed with all a father's love for his recovery,
+I have since thought--- oh, how often!--that it would have been far
+better for him to have died. But he was spared; and, having been
+thoroughly frightened by his narrow escape from the effects of
+drunkenness, he vowed, on his recovery, that he would never touch
+another drop of liquor. This pledge he kept for some months after his
+health was fully restored.
+
+"Having decided to educate him for the law--the only profession that he
+did not hold in contempt--I procured a place for him in the office of
+Mulroy, Biggup & Lartimore, an excellent firm with whom I had had
+some dealings.
+
+"Myndert entered upon his study of the profession with such ardor, that
+I was obliged to caution him against ruining his health. But he only
+laughed, and said he wanted to make up for past follies. I had never
+before seen him in a penitent mood, and I was delighted. Mr. Mulroy, who
+has had a hundred pupils in his time, told me that he never had a more
+promising one than Myndert. He was a regular and constant attendant at
+the office, and spent all his evenings at home. The natural strength of
+his constitution came to his aid, as if to encourage him in his efforts
+to reform; and, notwithstanding his severe studies, he began to look in
+better health than he had ever been. Thus things went on six whole
+weeks, and I was happy, and busied myself in framing plans for my son's
+advancement in life.
+
+"He told me, one day, that he had joined a club of young law students,
+who met every evening and discussed legal points, held mock courts, and
+thus sought to familiarize themselves with the duties of their
+profession; and asked me if I approved of it. He sought my approval so
+rarely for anything, that I freely gave it, cautioning him again,
+however, to be careful of his health. He laughed at my apprehensions.
+But I was pained to see how soon my fears proved true. Within a
+fortnight, the rosy color of his cheeks had disappeared, and his eyes
+were palpably sunken, dull, and marked with a sickly blue beneath. He
+never returned home till midnight, and sometimes was out till three
+o'clock in the morning. I scolded him for devoting so much time to his
+law club; but he said that the members were, like himself, enthusiastic
+students, and that he was always the first to leave their fascinating
+debates and mimic trials. A week later, I marked the familiar bloat in
+his cheeks, and suspected the truth.
+
+"Placing a watch upon his movements--no easy matter, for he is very
+shrewd and cautious--I soon found out that the law club was a myth, and
+that his nights were passed in the wildest debauchery. He had not only
+resumed all his old vices, but had acquired new ones.
+
+"When I reproved him, as I did with just indignation, he threw off the
+mask of concealment, which he said he was tired of wearing, and became
+the same bold, defiant, reckless boy that he always was; while I
+continued to be the same weak, foolish, fond parent. I cannot recount
+the tortures inflicted upon me by my son since that fatal discovery. He
+has not only abandoned all his law studies (having been expelled from
+the office of Mulroy, Biggup & Lartimore for grossly insulting a young
+female client), and utterly ruined his own body and soul, but, by his
+acts, he has brought shame upon several families.
+
+"When this new series of outrages came to my knowledge, I threatened to
+disinherit him. He laughed at me. He knew how I loved him for his
+mother's sake, and, with that hold upon my affections, he defied me.
+
+"To heartless indifference he gradually added insults, and often cursed
+me, his own father, in this very room, where his mother has rocked his
+cradle a thousand times while she listened to my reading of an old poem
+or novel. The last of his crimes of which I have heard, was brought to
+my knowledge about six weeks ago. It was a piece of treachery the most
+villanous, and I told my son, in plain words, what I thought of it. I
+was weak and nervous from an illness which is hereditary in my family,
+and I reprimanded him with more severity than usual. I told him, that if
+God, in His infinite mercy, spared him, yet he was not secure from just
+punishment from the friends of those whom he had wronged, and that the
+human vengeance, which had been so long postponed, would surely come. He
+looked at me with malice in his small gray eyes (not his mother's eyes),
+and, when I ceased speaking, raised both hands to heaven, and, with the
+most horrible blasphemy, called down its curses upon me; and then he
+swore, that if I crossed his path, or thwarted his plans, or refused him
+money, he would kill me.
+
+"Just before he uttered this monstrous threat, I sprang from my chair
+with horror, and caught him imploringly by both hands. I would have
+saved him from that dreadful act, but I was too late. I saw him wrench
+away his right hand, and raise it to strike me back.... I knew no more,
+until Mrs. Frump, my niece, who has had charge of my household during
+the past three years, entered the room, and found me stretched
+insensible on the floor."
+
+"I saw a part of the sad scene," said Marcus Wilkeson, who had listened
+with mingled indignation and compassion to this strange tale. "Your son
+was standing by that window, and you were sitting near him, also within
+sight of me. I distinctly saw you catch your son's hands with your own;
+he wrenched the right one away, and raised it; then you fell, but he did
+not strike you, or attempt to. As you dropped to the floor, he glanced
+anxiously through the window, saw me watching him, and then pulled down
+the curtain."
+
+"Then he did not strike me to the floor! I never believed he did, for
+there was no bruise or other mark upon my head. Thank God, my son was
+spared the commission of that crime! Bad as he is, he would not strike
+his own father." And the poor old gentleman's heart found meagre
+comfort, for a moment, in that thought.
+
+"A few words more, and I am done. The shock brought my disease to a
+crisis. For over a month my recovery was doubtful. But my naturally
+tough constitution, skilful medical attendance, and the unceasing care
+of Mrs. Frump, brought me safely out of it. The devotion of that good,
+light-hearted woman was truly affecting. She never left my bedside,
+night or day, except for a few hours' rest; and even to-day, when, as
+you see, I am well enough to sit up and talk, and, in fact, am perfectly
+restored to health, it was only by almost pushing her into the street
+that I could get her to go out for a day's shopping--a luxury which the
+good soul had denied to herself during all my illness."
+
+("I must tell Maltboy about this excellent woman," thought Marcus,)
+
+"My son did not come near my sickbed, and I have not seen him since that
+unhappy day. He has visited the house daily, and shut himself in his
+room for several hours. How he occupies his time, I cannot imagine, but
+am sure that it is only in studying or practising evil."
+
+"Possibly I may throw some light on that mystery," said Marcus. "I have
+seen him, from my convenient window, enter his room, day after day,
+generally in the afternoon, sit down at his table, and write for over an
+hour steadily."
+
+"That is strange!" exclaimed the old gentleman. "He has given up the
+study of law. He has no taste for literary labor. He writes a beautiful
+hand, and would not waste time in trying to improve his penmanship. It
+is singular, indeed."
+
+"His work, whatever it is, does not seem to satisfy him; for I have
+observed that he no sooner fills a page with writing, than he burns it
+to ashes by the gas jet, which he always keeps faintly lighted above
+his head."
+
+"Some more villany, I am sure," said the old gentleman, with a deep
+sigh. "We shall find it out by its terrible consequences, in due time.
+He has plenty of leisure to cultivate his vices, but not a moment to
+seek my forgiveness (which, God knows, I would freely grant, if he would
+only ask it). He cannot even throw away a word upon Mrs. Frump, to find
+out whether his own father is dead or alive."
+
+The last thought gave acute pain to the wretched parent. Tears again
+sprang to his eyes, and Marcus feared that he was about to witness that
+saddest sight in nature--an old man weeping.
+
+But, by an effort, Mr. Van Quintem stifled his emotion, and, turning
+suddenly upon his visitor, cried, in a voice of despair:
+
+"Tell me, sir, in Heaven's name, what _shall I_ do with my son?"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+THE YOUNG MONSTER.
+
+From boyhood, it had been Marcus Wilkeson's fortune (or the reverse) to
+attract confidence, and to be sought out for advice. And it had most
+generally happened that he was requested to bestow the last valuable
+article in cases where inexperience absolutely disqualified him from
+giving it.
+
+He had found, however, that, when people ask for advice, they expect to
+receive it, although they reserve to themselves the right, and, in
+ninety-nine cases out of a hundred, exercise the privilege, of
+rejecting it.
+
+But Marcus had gathered, from the old gentleman's story, that the error
+of his dealings with the rebellious son lay in his constantly seeking
+advice from everybody, and taking it, too, instead of adopting some
+firm, consistent, and independent course of his own toward that unfilial
+monster. Furthermore, Marcus knew that the son was already beyond the
+reach of reform. For the future peace of his venerable friend, and for
+the good of society, he could have conscientiously recommended
+two things:
+
+First, the immediate hanging of Myndert Van Quintem, jr. Second, his
+imprisonment for life in a penitentiary warranted to be strong enough
+to hold him.
+
+Neither of these courses being practicable until that young man had
+entitled himself to the benefit of one or the other of them in the
+legitimate way, Marcus Wilkeson had nothing to offer, and so he told the
+old gentleman.
+
+Mr. Van Quintem was disappointed. He looked up wistfully, and said:
+
+"Can't you suggest something?"
+
+Thus appealed to, Marcus angled in the deep waters of his mind, and
+fished up this inadequate idea:
+
+"Let him travel a couple of years in Europe."
+
+"I have proposed it," returned the old gentleman, "but he won't, unless
+I give him five thousand dollars, and an unlimited letter of credit.
+This I refused. Besides, to tell the truth, I do not wish to exile the
+boy, but to reform him at home."
+
+Marcus was too polite to say bluntly that that was impossible; so he
+cast in his line again at random, and drew out this worthless
+suggestion:
+
+"Stop all his pocket money, and tell him plainly that you will
+disinherit him unless he reforms."
+
+"My dear sir," replied the old gentleman, "that might do with some sons,
+but not with mine. He would obtain money by theft, or even a worse
+crime, and bring disgrace upon my gray hairs. He might go even
+farther--for he has threatened it, as I told you--and murder me in
+revenge. Besides, he is on short allowance now. I give him only thirty
+dollars a week--less than a quarter of what he used to receive from me.
+Much as his conduct deserves punishment, I could not reduce him to
+beggary, you know."
+
+This useless discussion was cut short by the precipitate entrance of the
+subject of it. Mr. Van Quintem was greatly surprised at the sudden
+apparition, and his face exhibited signs first of astonishment, then of
+indignation, then of pleasure, in quick succession. But before his
+erring son Had advanced halfway toward the father's chair, the father
+turned his head slightly away, as if not daring to trust himself to an
+interview.
+
+The son took one sharp survey of Marcus, and then slipped his right hand
+insinuatingly in that of his father, which hung over an arm of the easy
+chair. Mr. Van Quintem turned his face farther away, but Marcus observed
+that his fingers closed upon the hand which lay within them.
+
+"Are you quite well, my dear father?" asked the son, in a low, hollow
+voice, not meant to be overheard by the visitor.
+
+"I am, thanks to God, and the doctor, and my niece," said the father,
+stealing a side look at his son.
+
+"And no thanks to me, I know that. I feared, my dear father, after what
+had occurred, that you could not bear the sight of me. Therefore I kept
+away from your bedside."
+
+"That is a lame excuse, Myndert," replied the father. He spoke in a
+voice intended to be audible to Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+A gleam in the son's sunken eyes, and a new pallor on his bloated
+cheeks, indicated his displeasure at the turn which this conversation
+was taking. He withdrew his hand, and said, in a deep whisper:
+
+"I did not think you would quarrel with me, when I called to
+congratulate you on your recovery."
+
+Mr. Van Quintem wavered a moment. Then, looking at the calm face of
+Marcus Wilkeson, as if to gather strength from it, he replied:
+
+"My son, such language is not respectful to your father. You know, as
+God knows, that I have been too indulgent with you."
+
+The son coolly twirled the ends of his mustache--which protruded from
+each side of his mouth like the antennae of a catfish--and gazed
+impudently in his father's face. Then he turned about, and bestowed
+another scornful, analyzing look on the tranquil Marcus.
+
+"That is a friend of mine, Myndert, and I have no secrets from him. Mr.
+Wilkeson--my son."
+
+Marcus politely rose, and offered his hand to the young man, who
+accepted it reluctantly.
+
+"I have seen you before, I believe," said he. "Across the way, eh?"
+
+"I dare say," was the reply. "I sometimes sit at the window, reading."
+
+Myndert then abruptly faced his fatherland Marcus resumed his chair.
+
+"Since you have no secrets from this gentleman," said the son, "allow me
+to ask if you could conveniently spare five hundred dollars
+this morning?"
+
+The old gentleman hesitated; then reassured himself by an observation of
+Marcus Wilkeson's face, and said:
+
+"No, my son; I can no longer encourage this extravagance. Where is your
+last monthly allowance?"
+
+"Gone, of course," answered the son, in a loud and insolent tone. "Do
+you expect to keep me on miserable driblets like that?"
+
+"Thirty dollars a week, and board and lodging, are enough for any
+reasonable young man, Myndert. I cannot give you more."
+
+The son glared on his father and Marcus Wilkeson (holding the latter
+chiefly responsible for the refusal) with amazement.
+
+"Since you are obstinate, then, make it three hundred." The son had
+often been able to obtain half or two thirds of what he originally
+asked, as a compromise.
+
+Again the old gentleman wavered; and it was not until he had looked
+Marcus Wilkeson straight in the eye, that he answered, striking the arm
+of the chair with his thin white hand:
+
+"Not one cent!"
+
+The tumid cheeks assumed a sicklier white, and the small, offensive eyes
+sparkled with a fiercer fury, as the son replied:
+
+"Very well, sir. Be as stingy as you please. Take the advice of your new
+friend here, and cut off my beggarly monthly allowance, too. But
+remember, I must have money, and I will have it!"
+
+Had Marcus Wilkeson not been present, the father might have been brought
+to terms by this vague but dreadful threat. But now he shook his head,
+as an intimation that nothing could move him.
+
+"You have taken your own course, sir," continued the son, through his
+closed teeth. "I shall take mine. Don't forget my last words. As for
+you, sir," turning to Marcus Wilkeson, "we shall probably meet again."
+
+Marcus urbanely responded that nothing could give him greater pleasure.
+The son, darting a last malignant look at his father, whose face was
+happily averted, strode out of the room, slamming the door, and
+afterward the street door, with increased emphasis.
+
+When he had gone, the father said to his visitor, feebly:
+
+"Have I done right?"
+
+"Precisely. Your conduct was firm, prudent, and will have a good
+effect."
+
+"I hope so--I hope so. But don't you think, now, I was a little too
+severe--to begin with, I mean? I fear that my son will be driven to
+crime; and that would kill me."
+
+"I regard his threats as only empty words," replied Marcus. He has found
+them useful heretofore, and he tries them now. Having learned that they
+do not longer frighten you, he will never employ them again. That is one
+point gained. If he is really bad enough to commit a crime for money,
+your misjudged kindness will not prevent him, but will rather encourage
+his evil disposition."
+
+"There is truth in what you say," replied the old gentleman, faintly;
+"but I--I--fear."
+
+The protracted conversation, and the suppressed agony of the past few
+minutes, were too much for the old gentleman to bear on his first day of
+convalescence. He suddenly turned very pale, and his head drooped.
+Marcus threw open a window, and held the cordial to his lips. As Marcus
+was applying this restorative, without any perceptible benefit, the door
+opened, and Mrs. Frump ran in, red in the face, and quite out of breath.
+
+"Excuse me, sir. I am Mrs. Frump, Mr. Van Quintem's niece."
+
+"I am Mr. Wilkeson, a friend of Mr. Van Quintem," said Marcus, hastily
+introducing himself; "and I am glad you are come."
+
+"Yes, I see. Fainted away. Revive in a moment. Fresh air. Cordial, Quite
+right. Now a little water on his forehead."
+
+Mrs. Frump made her sentences short, to accommodate her breath.
+
+As she passed a cool sponge across the patient's brow, she said:
+
+"I knew it would be so. He has been here. I saw him round the corner.
+Looking pale and mad."
+
+"You are right, madam. He _has_ been here."
+
+Mrs. Frump's pleasant little eyes shone with unnatural anger, and there
+was a presage of wrathful words in her quivering lips. Mrs. Frump was
+desperately trying to keep back certain private opinions that she had
+long entertained, but proved unequal to the effort. She burst out with:
+
+"He's an undutiful son, sir. A monster, sir. And he's killing his poor
+father. He's--"
+
+"Ah! what?" said Mr. Van Quintem, opening his eyes, and looking wildly
+around, like one who wakes from a horrible dream.
+
+"It's I. Your niece--Gusty," replied Mrs. Frump, changing her assumed
+harsh tones into her natural soft ones "And I think you had better go to
+bed. Please take hold, Mr. Wilkeson, and assist him to the next room."
+She added, in a whisper, "Don't talk with him any more to-day."
+
+Mr. Wilkeson nodded, raised his eyebrows to signify that he appreciated
+the advice, and proceeded at once to aid Mrs. Frump in her benevolent
+task. The old gentleman had considerably revived by this time.
+
+"You are right, my dear Gusty," said he, looking fondly at his niece.
+"You are always right. And you are right, too, sir," he added, turning
+to Marcus. "Ah, if I had known such a good adviser years ago."
+
+Marcus, remembering Mrs. Frump's injunction, made no answer to this
+remark.
+
+When the old gentleman had been led tottering into the adjacent parlor,
+which was fitted up as his bedroom, and placed comfortably on a high
+prop of pillows, Marcus drew out his watch, made an amiable pretence of
+very important business down town, and bade his venerable friend
+"good-by."
+
+"I had hoped you could stay longer; for I feel that you are a true
+friend, and I can confide my sorrows to you," murmured the old
+gentleman, taking his guest fondly by the hand.
+
+But Marcus, fortified by another significant look from Mrs. Frump,
+declared that business was imperative, and he must go. He would call
+to-morrow, without fail, and hoped to find his friend as cheerful as a
+cricket. The old gentleman smiled at the absurdity of that hope, and
+said he should depend on seeing him to-morrow.
+
+So, shaking hands warmly with Mr. Van Quintem, and bowing most
+respectfully to Mrs. Frump, Marcus took his departure, and meditated, as
+he walked slowly home, on the strange occurrences of the day.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+WESLEY TIFFLES.
+
+One evening, shortly after the events narrated in the last chapter, the
+three bachelors, having finished dinner, and escaped from the grim
+presence of Miss Philomela Wilkeson, took their accustomed seats and
+pipes in the little back parlor. The curtains were drawn, the gas was
+lighted, the fire burning brightly, and, upon these outward tokens of
+cheer, the three bachelors reflected contentment and happiness from
+their six eyes. In his own opinion, each of the three had unlimited
+cause to be happy; and not even that killjoy of the household, Miss
+Wilkeson, could mar the completeness of their felicity--when she was
+not present.
+
+Fayette Overtop was blessed with the thought, that in Mrs. Slapman he
+had found, at last, that rare bird for which he had patiently hunted
+through the valleys and uplands of society--"a sensible woman." The
+intellectual sympathy which was enkindled between them on the memorable
+occasion of their first meeting, had grown warmer at each successive
+interview--first at a supper party, second at a _conversazione_, and
+third at a private theatrical and musical entertainment, to all of which
+Mr. Overtop had been invited, with the particular compliments of the
+liberal hostess.
+
+During this pleasant acquaintance, Mr. Overtop had made the
+extraordinary discovery that Mrs. Slapman was married, and that the thin
+little man whom he saw dodging up the stairs on New Year's day was
+her husband.
+
+It would be difficult to explain, on behalf of Mr. Overtop, a phenomenon
+which Mr. Overtop was never able to explain to the satisfaction of the
+gossip-loving public, or of his best friends. We therefore content
+ourselves with merely stating the fact, that Mr. Overtop's admiration
+for Mrs. Slapman was purely intellectual; that he was fascinated by her
+vivacious intellect, and not by her substantial person; by the charm of
+her manners, and not of her face. He looked upon Mrs. Slapman as a
+masculine mind and soul, of uncommon depth, made powerfully magnetic by
+its enshrinement in a feminine form. Overtop once told Matthew Maltboy,
+that he knew, in his own experience, the meaning of Platonic love. But
+Matthew, who was a sad materialist even in his sentimental moods,
+laughed at him, and winked. Overtop positively felt hurt at this unkind
+reception of his confidences, and never again alluded to the state of
+his feelings toward Mrs. Slapman, until subsequent occurrences made it
+necessary in self-defence.
+
+With Mr. Slapman he was not personally acquainted; but he had
+ascertained privately, from a musical frequenter of the house, who
+invariably brought his flute with him, and who was understood to be the
+oldest friend of the family, that Mr. Slapman owned a large property in
+wild land in Pennsylvania, not a hundred miles from New York; that he
+was improving it, and selling it out in building lots, and had already
+cleared a handsome fortune; that he was a strict business man, and
+looked after his affairs in person, passing between New York and
+Slapmansville (the name of the new settlement) twice a week, and
+spending the larger part of his time at the latter place. Also that,
+next to avarice, which was his crowning trait, his chief fault was
+jealousy. It galled him to think that his wife had obtained a settlement
+in bank from him before marriage, which enabled her to indulge her
+tastes for society; and it enraged him still more to observe how much
+she was loved and admired by others, when he had purchased her
+exclusively for his private love and admiration. He it was who was to be
+sometimes seen stalking through the parlors with a pale face, or running
+up and down the front staircase in a state of great nervous agitation.
+None of Mrs. Slapman's visitors had the pleasure of his personal
+acquaintance; and it was considered a point of good breeding not to
+allude to him in her presence.
+
+For this misguided man Fayette Overtop felt a real pity. He yearned to
+expostulate with him gently, as a friend. Taking Mr. Slapman's hand in
+his own, he would have said:
+
+"Your wife is a precious gift to the world. Seek not to check the
+outflow of her ardent nature. Thank Heaven that you are the custodian of
+such a treasure, not to be selfishly monopolized by yourself, but held
+in trust for the benefit of society."
+
+Overtop's meditations, on this particular occasion, pertained to the
+style of the costume which would most become him as the lover of Mrs.
+Slapman, in an original play to be enacted at her house toward the close
+of the week. The question was chiefly of knee breeches. Overtop was
+mentally debating whether he ought not, in justice to his thin legs, to
+substitute an ampler style of integuments.
+
+Matthew Maltboy had also been invited to this _soirée dramatique_ (as
+Mrs. Slapman's large pasteboards expressed it). A fat man was a
+necessity of the play. Mrs. Slapman was not cordial to Matthew,
+regarding him as an excessively commonplace person, and had invited him
+to her social gatherings out of courtesy to Overtop; but her artist eye
+saw in him a fitness for the fat man. Matthew was delighted with the
+implied compliment to those talents for the stage which every man
+supposes himself to possess in some degree, and cheerfully undertook
+the part.
+
+The proprieties of costume did not in the least perplex Mr. Maltboy, as
+he lay on the sofa digesting his dinner, and puffing out smoke rings by
+the dozen. His thoughts were mildly fixed on that delightful Miss
+Whedell. Five times he had been graciously permitted to visit the lady
+at her house, and to discover a score of new charms at each interview. A
+large experience in love making assured him that the object of his
+idolatry was not wholly indifferent to him. The paternal Whedell had
+hobbies. Matthew had studied them, like a skilful strategist, catered to
+them, and felt quite sure that he had that revered individual on his
+side. But, in the midst of these pleasant imaginings, there rose the
+dark and baleful image of Chiffield!
+
+Marcus Wilkeson was also pondering--pleasantly, if one might judge from
+the contented smile upon his lips. The subject of his thoughts was one
+which, for reasons that seemed good to him, he still kept secret from
+his fellow bachelors. He had freely told them of his singular adventure
+at the house of the old gentleman opposite; but not a word of the
+inventor and his daughter, and of the private school at Miss Pillbody's.
+Not even the minute and sometimes tedious accounts which Overtop and
+Maltboy gave of their private thoughts and experiences, could induce
+Marcus to reciprocate their confidence. For the first time in his life
+he wore a mask before his companions, and prevaricated, and became, on a
+small scale, a humbug.
+
+The sharp ringing of the doorbell broke in upon the quiet reflections of
+the three bachelors. Mash, the cook, who was at that moment reading the
+fifteenth chapter of "The Buttery and the Boudoir: A Tale of Real Life,"
+in her favorite weekly, threw down the paper in a passion, bounded up
+stairs, and admitted John Wesley Tiffles, or Wesley Tiffles, as he
+always subscribed himself on promissory notes and other worthless paper.
+Mr. Tiffles chucked Mash familiarly under the chin (resented with a
+scornful look by Mash, who had learned from "The Buttery and the
+Boudoir" to set a proper value on herself), and then walked straight to
+the parlor, like one who knew he was a welcome guest.
+
+And he was right. For when he opened the door, and disclosed to the
+three bachelors the well-known laughing eyes, hopeful face, and spare
+figure of Wesley Tiffles, they hailed him with enthusiasm. He was a
+walking cure for despondency, although he sometimes charged too high, in
+the shape of borrowed money, for his professional services. But neither
+of the three bachelors had yet sustained that pecuniary tax which Wesley
+Tiffles always levied upon his friends, just before leaving them
+forever. They formed a part of his reserve corps, which had latterly
+been sadly thinned out in Mr. Tiffles's desperate contest with
+the world.
+
+Mr. Tiffles shook hands with Marcus Wilkeson, giving him the grip of
+some unknown Order, slapped Overtop on the back, and playfully pulled
+the whiskers of Maltboy. Then he filled a pipe, threw himself into a
+chair, adjusted his legs in the true form of a compass, and opened his
+coat ostentatiously. All this in about ten seconds, and with a geniality
+that defied reproof. He was the very embodiment of cheer.
+
+"Prepare to be astonished," said Mr. Tiffles, after his third whiff. "I
+have a splendid idea." The three bachelors smiled, and nodded an
+intimation that they were prepared,
+
+"I have had some impracticable notions in my time; but this _is_ good,
+and you'll say so. You know that dog, Mark, two doors below--the large
+yellow one, with cropped ears, and a tail like the handle of a
+shaving brush?"
+
+Mr. Wilkeson replied that he had the pleasure of the animal's
+acquaintance,
+
+"Well, as I was passing the dog's house on my way here, I slipped in the
+snow. The dog, always on the alert for victims, took a mean advantage of
+my situation, and jumped after me through the open gate. I scrambled to
+my feet, but not before he had fastened his teeth in my right leg----"
+
+"Good heavens! was he mad?" cried Overtop, who had a horror of dogs, and
+made wide circuits about them in the street.
+
+"Can't say as to that," replied Wesley Tiffles, "but advise you to keep
+shy of him for the future, I was about to say that he bit me through the
+leg of my trowsers. And on that very instant, as if by inspiration, I
+caught--not the hydrophobia, but a magnificent idea. Having got on my
+pins, I kicked the dog into his front yard, and immediately worked the
+idea into shape. You'll be sure to like it."
+
+Marcus Wilkeson, speaking for self and friends, said he had no doubt of
+that. Mr. Tiffles's ideas always possessed the merit of novelty.
+
+"That means that they have no other merit!" returned Tiffles, laughing,
+"Very true of most of them, I confess all my failures. But here is an
+idea which even you, skeptic as you are, will grant to be not only
+novel, but great. You have all observed, gentlemen, the immense
+differences in dogs. There are white, black, brown, gray, yellow (like
+our suggestive canine friend two doors below), tan-colored,
+mouse-colored, striped, and spotted dogs. There are round dogs, square
+dogs, long dogs, short dogs, tall dogs, and low dogs. There are
+full-grown dogs that weigh less than a pound, and others that kick the
+beam at a hundred pounds. There are dogs that are pretty much all tail,
+and there are dogs that have no tail to speak of. Among all the dogs
+that you meet in the street, do you ever see two exactly alike?"
+
+Fayette Overtop, who spoke from extensive and minute observation,
+unhesitatingly said "No."
+
+"True! Nature never repeats herself in dogs. In so doing, Nature works
+directly for my benefit, as I will show you. Now, in the second place,
+as you are probably aware, there is an ordinance forbidding unmuzzled
+dogs to run in the streets during the hot months--"
+
+"An excellent law," interrupted Overtop.
+
+"If caught at large without muzzles, they are taken to the public pound,
+and, unless redeemed by the owners within twenty-four hours, are drowned
+in a tub--"
+
+"Serve 'em right," remarked the hydrophobiac bachelor.
+
+"Now, I am _slightly_ acquainted with some members of the Common
+Council" (he laid emphasis on the word "slightly," to imply that he was
+on terms of the closest intimacy with them), "and can easily obtain from
+them the privilege of catching all the stray dogs, and taking them out
+of the country next summer."
+
+"Which would be very benevolent to the dogs; and, regarded from their
+point of view, your idea is a noble one," thoughtfully observed Marcus
+Wilkeson. "But I don't, at this moment, exactly see how you are
+benefited by it."
+
+Mr. Tiffles smiled with the consciousness of power, and chidingly said:
+
+"You are dull this morning, Mark--quite dull. Strike, but hear! In a
+word, then, I propose to exhibit two or three hundred of these dogs, in
+some country where there are _no_ dogs. I would give them strange names,
+put them in cages, and call them the 'American Menagerie of Trained
+Animals.' A person who had never seen dogs, would suppose each one to be
+a different species from the others--just as the lion, the tiger, and
+the leopard are different, though all belonging to the one cat family.
+Now, there is my idea. What do you think of it? Of course, you laugh,
+at first."
+
+Roars of laughter from the three bachelors had formed the chorus of
+"Wesley Tiffles's closing sentences. Marcus Wilkeson, as became his age,
+was the first to recover himself.
+
+"The idea is a splendid one. None better. But there is one slight
+difficulty in the way. Where are you to find your country that has no
+dogs? If there were such a happy land on the face of this earth, Overtop
+would have hunted it up long ago, and moved there."
+
+Overtop laughingly replied, "That's so." He then informed Mr. Tiffles,
+while admitting the theoretical excellence of his idea, that every
+nation had its dogs as well as its fleas. Those two friends of man were
+impartially distributed over the terrestrial globe. Overtop referred to
+the standard Cyclopaedias, and several works on Natural History, in
+proof of his assertion.
+
+"Can't be! can't be!" retorted Wesley Tiffles, who was at first disposed
+to defend his brilliant idea. But brilliant ideas were a common growth
+of his fertile mind, and, like all things easily produced, he held them
+cheaply. The moment that evidence, or the test of practice, showed them
+to be fallacious, he gave them up, and drew upon his brain for others.
+So, after a second's reflection, he added:
+
+"Perhaps you are right. Dogs are not exactly in my line, after all. But
+the idea, as an idea, was magnificent."
+
+As Wesley Tiffles spoke, he repeated the act, for the twentieth time, of
+throwing back his overcoat (a little seedy), and opening his vest, as if
+to draw attention to his shirt front, whose natural whiteness was toned
+down by a delicate neutral tint. Immediately afterward, he placed his
+hand on a small breastpin in the centre of the shirt front, and turned
+it to the right and left. It sparkled for the first time in the rays of
+the fire, and revealed to the experienced eyes of the three bachelors
+simultaneously, that Wesley Tiffles was the wearer of a real diamond.
+
+"Excuse me," said Marcus Wilkeson, who divined that Tiffles wished his
+diamond to be remarked upon, "but that is pretty!"
+
+"Pretty! What?" said Tiffles, looking about the room.
+
+"That diamond."
+
+"Oh! the diamond. Perhaps you would like to look at it?" (hands it round
+for inspection). "Cost forty dollars. Rather a hard draw on my
+exchequer" (that was Mr. Tiffles's word for a friend's pocket); "but I
+considered it a most judicious investment for a young man just going
+into business."
+
+The novelty of this idea was not lost on Fayette Overtop. "Pray explain,
+Tiffles," said he.
+
+"Cheerfully," said Tiffles, replacing the gem in his shirt front, after
+it had been duly handled and admired. "Nobody will acknowledge that he
+is taken in by a diamond. He will say, 'Anybody can buy a diamond, by
+saving up thirty or forty dollars; and why should I believe a man to be
+rich who wears one?' Yet, in his heart of hearts, he does believe it,
+unless the possessor of the diamond has the bad taste to dress flashily.
+Then he passes for an impostor, and people will doubt, even against
+their own senses, the genuineness of the stone. But let him dress
+plainly, as I do," continued Mr. Tiffles, stroking down the left leg of
+his black trowsers, shiny with wear, "and that little diamond shall
+stand, in the eyes of the whole world, as the representative of a fat
+bank account, a brown stone house, and a couple of corner lots."
+
+Marcus and Matthew laughed, but Fayette Overtop, who absolutely revelled
+in paradoxes, said, "True, Tiffles, true!"
+
+"Don't think," pursued Tiffles, "that I expected to impose on you with
+it. You know that I am a poor devil, living on my wits." (Tiffles was
+delightfully frank with his intimate acquaintances.) "I hold out this
+glittering bait, not for my friends, but for my old foe and natural
+enemy, the world. You must know that I am on the eve of a grand
+speculation--probably the grandest I have ever undertaken."
+
+"Another plan of advertising with large kites by day, and pictorial
+lanterns attached to their tails at night?" asked Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"Or another Submarine Pneumatic Parcel-Delivering Tube to Brooklyn?"
+asked Matthew Maltboy.
+
+"Or an Association for the Cultivation of Mushrooms in Dark Cellars?"
+asked Fayette Overtop.
+
+"Capital hits!" replied Wesley Tiffles, who took an unfeigned delight in
+a friendly allusion to his failures. "But allow me to inform you
+definitely, that those unfortunate speculations are not to be revived.
+Like the lightning, I don't strike twice in the same place. No; the
+project upon which I am now engaged is one so eminently practical, so
+free from all that is visionary, that you will wonder how I thought of
+it. That project is a PANORAMA OF AFRICA!"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+THE PANORAMA OF AFRICA
+
+The three bachelors concurred in the opinion that the idea was a good
+one; but Marcus Wilkeson suggested that the field was too large.
+
+"I thought you would like the general proposition," said Tiffles. "But,
+bless you, Mark! I don't mean to paint the whole continent, from stem to
+stern, so to speak; only the undiscovered part of Central Africa--say
+from Cape Guardafui on the east to the Bight of Benin on the west."
+
+"But how the deuce," asked Matthew Maltboy, "are you, or anybody else,
+going to paint what has not been discovered?"
+
+Tiffles could hardly suppress a smile at the simplicity of the question.
+"Why," said he, "that's easy enough. Don't all the geographers tell us
+that the interior of Africa is made up, so far as known, of alternate
+deserts and jungles, like the patches on a coverlet? Very well. I
+conform to this general principle of the continent. I put half of the
+canvas in desert, and the rest in jungle, and I can't be far out of the
+way. Take the idea?"
+
+"Perfectly," said Matthew Maltboy; "but if you have nothing but
+alternate, deserts and jungles, it strikes me your panorama will be a
+little monotonous. Perhaps I am wrong." (Maltboy always offered
+suggestions timidly.)
+
+"I have thought of that, and guarded against it. I shall fill the
+jungles with animated life--elephants, lions, tigers, panthers,
+leopards, rhinoceroses, hippopotamuses, giraffes, zebras, crocodiles,
+boa constrictors, and other specimens of natural history indigenous to
+that delightful region."
+
+"Good!" cried Overtop; "and if you will take a hint from me, you will
+show your elephants in the act of being caught by natives, or engaged in
+combats with each other; your lions fighting your tigers or your
+rhinoceroses; your hippopotamuses engaged in death struggles with your
+crocodiles; and your boa constrictors gobbling down your natives--or, if
+that is objectionable on the score of humanity, your monkeys."
+
+"Thank you for the hint; but the expense, and the necessity of
+completing the panorama at an early day, put it out of the question. To
+paint accurate representations of these animals engaged in their
+innocent sports, would occupy the time of a first-class artist for
+months, and cost an enormous sum."
+
+"Ah, I see," interrupted Overtop, who liked to show that he snatched the
+meaning; "you will put your animals in recumbent attitudes--sleeping,
+perhaps, in the depth of jungles, shaded from the fierce rays of the
+equatorial sun."
+
+"You have guessed it," said Tiffles, with a broad smile. "Most of them
+will be just there--out of sight. The others will be suggested rather
+than introduced. Elephants will be signified by their trunks appearing
+above the tops of the dense undergrowth. Lions, tigers, and other
+quadrupeds, by the tips of their tails. A boa constrictor will be
+expressed by a head, a coil, and a bit of tail showing at intervals. The
+one horn of the rhinoceros will always tell where _he_ is. I shall have
+two small lakes (they are scarce in Africa) for my hippopotamuses and
+crocodiles. If they exhibit only small portions of their heads above the
+surface, that is not my fault. It is the nature of the beasts,
+you know."
+
+"Ha! ha! That is what I call Art concealing Art," said Overtop.
+
+"So it is," returned Tiffles; "and it will be appreciated, I doubt not,
+by those who affect the school of Severe Simplicity in painting."
+
+"One thing more," said Marcus Wilkeson. "Do you intend to take the
+panorama through the country, and lecture on it?"
+
+"I do. And here let me say, that I read up the law of false pretences
+long ago. I shall style myself Professor Wesley on the bills. That I
+have a right to do, as my full name doesn't look well in type. Actors
+and singers do the same thing every day. I shall call myself a great
+traveller. This is strictly true. I have been North to Boston, West to
+Detroit, and South to Baltimore. I shall not say that I have been in
+Africa, or that the sketches were taken on the spot. If my audience
+choose to infer _that_, that is their business. If any one doubts the
+accuracy of my panorama, I can say triumphantly, 'Prove it!'"
+
+"Excellent, but a little risky," said Marcus Wilkeson, who could not
+help admiring the audacity of the plan. "Your next great difficulty will
+be to satisfy audiences after you have got them together, as I dare say
+you will, by some brilliant system of advertising. I have heard--perhaps
+you have--of audiences breaking furniture, smashing chandeliers, and
+tarring and feathering people."
+
+"All that has been thought of," was the reply. "Before I leave the city,
+I shall give a private exhibition of the panorama to a few ministers of
+various denominations, in the lecture room of some up-town church.
+Ministers, you know, are debarred by their profession from attending the
+opera and theatres, and will catch at the chance to see a panorama for
+nothing. In private life, they are capital people, as a class--I have
+known several of them--and will willingly certify that the panorama is a
+highly moral, instructive, and interesting exhibition. I think I can
+rely on my persuasive powers for that much. These certificates I shall
+print on my posters and handbills. They will draw moral audiences. Moral
+audiences do not break furniture, &c., &c. Comprehend my line of
+argument?"
+
+"Perfectly," said Marcus; "and very ingenious, _as_ an argument."
+
+"I thought you would like it. And now, to drop the subject, I want you
+three fellows to come up to my rooms, No. 121, third floor, Bartholomew
+Buildings, Broadway--you remember--and see this great work of art, early
+next week."
+
+"Is it nearly finished?" asked Marcus.
+
+"Yes--in my mind's eye. That is the main thing. The painting has not yet
+been begun. It will be a very simple matter. The canvas will be about
+four hundred feet long. One half of it will be a dead level of yellow
+paint, for desert; and the rest, perpendicular stripes of green paint,
+for jungle. A good artist, with a whitewash brush and two tubsful of
+paint, ought to do up the whole panorama in two days. The heads and
+tails of animated life, the two small lakes, and a few other objects of
+interest, such as the sun, the moon, birds flying in the air, &c., could
+be put in afterward by an artist of higher grade. And, by the way, now I
+think of it, I may as well open with a sunrise off Cape Guardafui, and a
+distant view of the Straits of Babel Mandel, give a passing glance at
+the sources of the Nile, which lie in that undiscovered region, a brief
+glimpse at the Mountains of the Moon, and wind up with a splendid sunset
+in the Bight of Benin. It--"
+
+Mr. Tiffles's observations were cut short by the sudden entrance of Miss
+Philomela Wilkeson. She shot rapidly into the room, but, when her eyes
+rested on Mr. Tiffles, she recoiled with maiden modesty, and stepped
+back as if to beat a retreat. Then, recovering her self-possession in a
+small measure, she stepped forward again, and said, in the blandest of
+tones, with just the least virgin coyness:
+
+"I thought perhaps I had left my scissors here this afternoon."
+
+Messrs. Wilkeson, Overtop, and Maltboy asserted, without rising from
+their seats, that they had not seen her scissors, and doubted very much
+whether the scissors were in that room. But Wesley Tiffles, who was the
+most polite and obliging of mortals when there was a lady in the case,
+rose respectfully upon her entrance, and insisted upon searching the
+apartment for the missing tool.
+
+Miss Wilkeson, thus being placed under obligations to Mr. Tiffles, was
+compelled to take personal cognizance of him, which she did with the
+nearest approach to a blush that she was ever known to make. "I beg,
+sir, that you will not trouble yourself. I--I do not think the scissors
+are here, after all."
+
+"That can be ascertained only by searching, miss," replied Tiffles. Then
+he glided about the room in his own nimble fashion, looking behind the
+two vases on the mantelpiece, raking over the littered burden of the
+table in the corner, and peering and poking into every place where there
+was the least likelihood of finding a stray pair of scissors; Miss
+Wilkeson all the while deprecating any further search.
+
+Mr. Tiffles suddenly stopped, like a dragonfly in the midst of his
+angular dartings, and said: "Since your scissors are not to be found, it
+is fortunate that I have a pocket pair, which are always at your
+service." Mr. Tiffles produced the ill-omened article, and handed it to
+her. This called out a new lot of thanks, regrets for having troubled
+him, apologies, and a peremptory refusal to take his scissors,
+immediately followed by their acceptance, and a promise that she would
+take the best care of them, and return them to the owner on his
+next visit.
+
+Then was the auspicious moment for Miss Wilkeson to have retired with
+dignity; but she stood at the door, twirling the fatal scissors in her
+hand, and waiting either to say something which did not come
+spontaneously, or to have something said to her.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson saw a subtle motive in this awkward tarrying at the
+door, and, having no objection to gratifying it, he straightway
+introduced Mr. Wesley Tiffles to Miss Philomela Wilkeson. Mr. Tiffles
+put himself into the form of an L, like a professional acrobat; and Miss
+Wilkeson executed a courtesy in the old, exploded style. Then, as if
+appalled at what she had done, she backed into the entry as fast as she
+had come from it.
+
+Mr. Tiffles, upon whom the small events of life made no impression,
+thought no more of Miss Wilkeson that evening, but smoked three pipes,
+told two funny stories, sang one comic song, and then went home, having
+previously exacted from the three bachelors a promise to call at his
+rooms and see at least one half of the panorama completed, on the
+following day week.
+
+Since Miss Wilkeson had been an inmate of that house, she had seen
+Wesley Tiffles perhaps a dozen times, in the entry or on the doorsteps,
+and had been impressed with his gentlemanlike air, his quick black eyes,
+and his deferential manner toward her. Everybody is supposed to have a
+realized ideal somewhere, if he or she could only find it. Such was
+Wesley Tiffles to Philomela Wilkeson. Let it be confessed at once. The
+lost scissors were all the time quietly resting at the bottom of Miss
+Wilkeson's workbag, and she knew it. The prevalent frailty of human
+nature must be her excuse.
+
+She had-obtained not only an introduction to Wesley Tiffles, but a pair
+of scissors which must be returned to him, and were therefore a bond of
+friendship. But Miss Wilkeson forgot the fatality which the proverb
+attaches to gifts or loans of that particular article of cutlery.
+
+
+
+BOOK FIFTH.
+
+MANOEUVRES.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+STOLEN--MOKE THAN A PURSE.
+
+One morning, as Marcus Wilkeson was idly turning the pages of a
+blue-and-gold favorite, the doorbell rang. In accordance with some
+mysterious law of acoustics, the sound was full three minutes descending
+the kitchen staircase, entering the keyhole of the kitchen door, and
+striking on the tympanum of Mash, the cook, who was sitting by the fire,
+reading the twenty-fifth chapter of "The Buttery and the Boudoir: A Tale
+of Real Life." When Mash became fully conscious (which was not till the
+end of the chapter) that the bell had rung, she expelled a sigh from her
+fat chest, and wiped the tears from her eyes with the end of her clean
+apron, and then went to the door with a noble resignation to her lot.
+There she found a stout elderly woman, bearing a note for "Marcus
+Wilkeson, Esq."
+
+"Lor'! how slow you are!" said the stout woman, handing the letter to
+her.
+
+Mash, who had read, in the twenty-third chapter, of the overwhelming way
+in which the heroine cook had answered an insult by dignified silence,
+said not a word in reply, but took the note, and slammed the door in the
+stout woman's face.
+
+The exclamation "Bah!" and certain indistinct mutterings which were
+audible through the panels, convinced Mash that, by her self-denial, she
+had won a moral victory. It was with a feeling of excusable pride that
+she walked into the back parlor, and delivered the note to
+Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"Thank you, Mash," said he. It was a singular illustration of his
+excessive politeness, that he was no less grateful for paid services
+than for free.
+
+Mash retired, thinking to herself that, if Mr. Wilkeson were only a
+pirate, a smuggler, a guerilla chieftain, or a dashing fellow in some
+unlawful, dangerous business, a few years younger, he would be a
+perfect hero.
+
+Marcus did not recognize the handwriting of the address. Tearing open
+the envelope, he read the following lines, hastily scrawled on a bit of
+blue paper:
+
+     Wednesday, A.M.
+
+     MARCUS WILKESON, ESQ.:
+
+     SIR: Please come over and see me immediately. I have
+     something important to communicate.
+
+     Your obedient servant,
+
+     ELIPHALET MINFORD."
+
+"Something must be wrong," said Marcus; and startling thoughts then
+occurred to him. "Has her hard studying brought on illness? It can't be.
+She was well enough last evening. What can be the matter?"
+
+Marcus Wilkeson's temperament was of that unfortunate nervous sort which
+is thrown off its balance by the slightest shock. His frame trembled as
+he put on his overcoat and hat; and, when he looked in the mirror, he
+noticed that his face was paler than usual, and his eyes were glassy.
+"Pooh! what a sensitive fool I am!" said he.
+
+He walked hurriedly to Mr. Minford's, and mounted the long, creaking
+staircases, two steps at a time, tormenting himself all the way with
+vague apprehensions of evil.
+
+When he entered the room, without knocking (as was his custom of late),
+he found the inventor standing in front of his machine, with bare arms,
+hard at work. Marcus nervously said, "Good morning," and stepped forward
+to shake him by the hand, but stopped when he saw that Mr. Minford
+averted his face, and did not move.
+
+"I wished to show you a letter which I received a few minutes ago," said
+the inventor, still not facing Marcus, but busily filing off the rough
+edge of a brass wheel fresh from the mould. "There it is, on the table."
+
+Marcus caught up the letter, and read the following:
+
+     NEW YORK, Wednesday Forenoon.
+
+     MR. MINFORD:
+
+     RESPECTED SIR: Allow a true friend and well wisher to ask a
+     few questions. Who is this Mr. Marcus Wilkeson that has
+     suddenly taken such an interest in your family affairs? What
+     is his private history? Why is he relieving you from all
+     trouble and expense in the education of your beautiful child?
+     What are the man's _real_ motives? Would it not be well to
+     spare your eyes from your invention long enough to look into
+     these matters a little? Pardon the suggestion. The office of
+     a spy, and a secret accuser, is an unpleasant, and, perhaps,
+     a thankless one. I should never have assumed it, but for the
+     fact that your ardent devotion to science may render you the
+     easy dupe--and your daughter the innocent victim--of a
+     designing and heartless man of the world. I do not ask you to
+     believe the writer of an anonymous note, and therefore I make
+     no specific charges against this Wilkeson; but merely ask you
+     to inquire into his private character, and, above all, his
+     MOTIVES, for yourself.
+
+     ONE OF MANY.
+
+Though Marcus Wilkeson was as innocent as a child, in deed and thought,
+of the baseness hinted at in this letter, he felt that he was looking
+guilty. Astonishment and indignation kindled in his eyes; but a flush of
+shame mounted at the same time to his cheeks. Marcus had often said,
+that if he were tapped on the shoulder in the street, and charged with a
+petty theft, he would look guilty of grand larceny until he could regain
+command of his feelings. This diseased sensitiveness, inherited from his
+mother, was the curse of his physical and mental organization.
+
+His shame was increased by a consciousness that the inventor was
+stealthily watching him, and studying the enlargement of those horrid
+red spots on his cheeks.
+
+"When Marcus finished the letter, he put on an expression of outraged
+innocence--which matched poorly with the flaming tokens of
+guilt--and said:
+
+"These are infernal lies, sir; and, if I knew the coward who wrote them,
+I would cram them down his throat."
+
+"Of course they are lies," returned Mr. Minford. "Every anonymous letter
+writer is a liar--until it is proved that he tells the truth. I shall
+believe none of these low aspersions on your honor, Mr. Wilkeson,
+without conclusive evidence." As the inventor said this, not
+emphatically, Marcus saw that he believed all that the letter had
+insinuated.
+
+By this time, Marcus had got his constitutional devil a little under
+control. There was something of real boldness and honesty in his eyes,
+as he answered:
+
+"This is a distressing subject to talk or think of. But now that it has
+been brought before us, I demand a full investigation. Go, wherever you
+will, among those who know me, and inquire into my character. Recall
+everything that has occurred between us since the beginning of our
+acquaintance. Ask your daughter if I have ever spoken a word to her, or
+cast a look at her, which could justify these infamous insinuations.
+Thus much I ask of you, in justice to me."
+
+"And I refuse, sir," said the inventor. "I will not insult you by an
+unworthy suspicion. The world is full of impertinent people, and we can
+no more stop their gabble, than that of swallows in the air. This
+nameless fellow signs himself 'One of Many,' That is probably a lie. But
+if there were thousands like himself prying into your and my affairs, I
+should not care. As for motives, none but fools and misanthropes trouble
+themselves about _them_."
+
+The inventor tossed off the last sentence contemptuously. But Marcus
+knew that he did attach a great importance to motives; although he could
+not fairly be ranked either among the misanthropes or the fools. He
+therefore replied:
+
+"The whole world is welcome to inquire into my motives. As I understand
+them, they are: First, I take pleasure in your society, sir, because,
+like myself, you are a quiet, thinking man. Second, you have a
+hobby--your machine, there--and I admire people with hobbies. Third, I
+am fond of children, and--and--your daughter is a very pleasant,
+intelligent child. Fourth, you have insisted on selling me an interest
+in your invention, in return for a small loan, and that fact would draw
+me here, if nothing else did. These are motives enough to satisfy the
+most inquisitive mind, I should think."
+
+Marcus said this with an attempt at a light laugh. But there was one
+motive not yet confessed--a motive which could hardly be called a
+motive, for it lay dim and half-formed within his brain. He had never,
+in his moments of self-inquisition, acknowledged its existence to
+himself. How could he, then, venture to disclose it to another? It was
+the suppression of this immature motive, that brought back that look of
+deceit and guilt to Marcus Wilkeson's ingenuous face.
+
+This unfortunate physiognomical revelation was not lost upon the keen
+eyes of the inventor. But he said:
+
+"Mr. Wilkeson, let us not say another word on this ridiculous subject. I
+am ashamed of myself for showing you the letter. I ought to have thrown
+it into the fire."
+
+"There I differ with you, my dear sir," said Marcus. "You did perfectly
+right, and I am glad that I have had the opportunity to define my
+position here clearly, once and for all." Marcus could not avoid saying
+this much in mere civility to the inventor, but he indulged the private
+opinion that that gentleman should have burned the anonymous note.
+
+"Who can have written this scoundrelly thing?" continued Marcus,
+turning over the letter, and then the envelope, for the twentieth time
+each, and minutely examining them.
+
+The note was written on a half sheet of common letter paper. The
+manufacturer's stamp in the corner had been cut off, and the size of the
+half sheet further diminished by paring down one of the sides. The
+writing was what is known as "backhanded," in strokes which appeared at
+first sight to be of a uniform lightness. On inspecting it very closely,
+Marcus discovered a tendency, in this backhanded penmanship, to ascend
+from the line; and also that, in a few instances, the downward strokes
+on certain long letters were a trifle thicker than on others. That the
+writing was a man's, Marcus had no doubt, though he would have been
+puzzled to give the reasons which led him to that conclusion. The
+envelope was the ordinary prepaid-stamped one issued by the Government,
+and therefore could not contribute to the identification of the
+anonymous writer. The superscription was in the same backhand, and was
+peculiar in nothing but a small curved nourish, like Hogarth's line of
+beauty, beneath the words, "New York. City."
+
+"The rascal has carefully disguised his hand," said Marcus, "and does
+not mean to be found out. I can say nothing more positive, than that it
+is written by somebody who has never corresponded with me. My memory of
+autographs happens to be pretty tenacious."
+
+"And I am positive that it is written by no acquaintance of mine, or of
+my daughter's, for we have none--except you. As the case now stands, it
+is a mystery, not worth the exploring."
+
+"Again I differ with you," said Marcus. "Whoever wrote this false
+letter, has powerful motives of hostility to me or you, or,
+perhaps--worse still--to your daughter. I must try to smoke him out of
+his hiding place. Meanwhile, I trust, sir, you will see the propriety of
+concealing this unpleasant matter from Miss Minford."
+
+"Certainly, Mr. Wilkeson, certainly. As for myself, it is forever
+dismissed from my mind; and I cannot blame myself sufficiently for
+having troubled you with it." Mr. Minford here proffered his hand, which
+Marcus cordially shook, rejoicing to observe no trace of suspicion in
+the inventor's clear gray eyes.
+
+"Allow me to retain this letter for the present," asked Marcus. "It may
+serve as a clue to the detection of the concealed scoundrel. I also beg
+that you will show me any other anonymous letters of the same character
+that may reach you."
+
+Mr. Minford laughed. "The stove door is the pigeonhole where all such
+nonsense ought to be filed away. But just as you please. If any more
+come to hand, you shall see them. They may amuse you, as they do me.
+Ha! ha!"
+
+Marcus echoed the laugh, but feebly. Then it occurred to him that Pet
+would soon be home, and he felt a strange aversion to meeting her, after
+what had happened. He therefore pleaded a pressing engagement at eleven
+o'clock (which it then was), and took his departure from the inventor's
+roof, but not without a warm and seemingly sincere invitation to
+"call soon."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+CONSOLATIONS OF HIGH ART.
+
+Marcus walked slowly toward Broadway, musing and unhappy. To a man of
+his delicate and hyper-sensitive nature, an event of this kind was a
+vast disturbance. He felt that this anonymous letter was but the
+forerunner of a long series of troubles. That prescience which nervous
+people have of misfortunes portrayed to him a future black with
+disappointments and dangers.
+
+"Hallo, Mark! What's the matter? You look as sad as a low comedian by
+daylight!" Previous to this salutation came a ringing slap on the
+left shoulder.
+
+Marcus rather liked familiarities; but the slap, coming on him when his
+nerves were unstrung, startled him. He turned sharply; but the stern
+and indignant face wreathed into amiable smiles, when he saw that the
+lively gentleman behind him was only Wesley Tiffles. Everybody liked
+Wesley Tiffles; even those who bore the burden of his unlucky financial
+schemes uniting in cheerful testimony to his charming, companionable
+qualities. His presence was like a ray of sunlight to Marcus Wilkeson's
+beclouded mind; and when Wesley Tiffles hooked an arm in his (as he did
+to everybody on the second day of their acquaintance), Marcus felt his
+perplexities passing away from him, like electricity on a
+conducting rod.
+
+Wesley Tiffles and his single diamond (the latter from the background of
+a third day's shirt) shone on him together; and Marcus laughed
+merrily in reply:
+
+"I don't look sad now," said he. "I'm glad to see you, Tiffles. What are
+you driving at _now_, eh?"
+
+This question was continually poked at Tiffles. He changed his business
+so often.
+
+"At the panorama of Africa, to be sure," said Tiffles. "It is a great
+idea, and I am constant to it, although several capital schemes have
+occurred to me since I first thought of it. But Africa deserves, and
+shall have the precedence."
+
+"Oh! yes--I remember. And how far have you got along with this great
+work?"
+
+"It's almost finished, thank you. Patching is the artist. You know
+Patching, of course--one of the most promising painters of the modern
+school. There were several Patchings very much praised by the Sunday
+papers, at the last National Academy Exhibition, though the hanging
+committee put them either among the dirt or the cobwebs. This conspiracy
+against Patching is far-reaching. It would seem as if his rivals of the
+Academy actually went about town calling upon people, and cautioning
+them _not_ to buy Patchings. Indeed, to such an extent has this
+outrageous attempt to put down a fellow artist been carried, that I know
+of but one Patching to be publicly seen in the city. It is an attic
+interior--a sweet thing, quite equal to Frère, and hangs behind a bar
+near Spring street. Perhaps you would like to examine it?"
+
+"Hem! Not to-day. Some other time," answered Marcus, who, strangely
+enough, interpreted the question as an invitation to drink at his
+(Marcus's) expense.
+
+"I did not mean to-day," said Wesley Tiffles. "Any time will do. Well, I
+have engaged this brilliant but neglected creature to paint my panorama.
+At first he refused--as I expected. He said that it would hurt his
+reputation. I argued to him, that, the larger the picture, the more the
+reputation; and said that I would put his name on the bills in type
+second only to my own. But he could not bring himself to see the matter
+as I did, and consented to paint it only on condition of profound
+secrecy. Price, one hundred dollars. You will therefore understand
+(Tiffles lowered his voice) that what I am saying to you is strictly
+confidential--as, indeed, all is that I say about my panorama. Secrecy
+alone gives value to these grand, original ideas."
+
+Wesley Tiffles was always unbosoming himself to the world, and informing
+each individual hearer that his disclosure was strictly confidential.
+
+"I give you my word," said Marcus. He wondered where Tiffles raised the
+money to pay the artist, but did not like to ask him.
+
+"Now I have caught you, you must come and see how we get along. The work
+is going on at my room in the Bartholomew Buildings, only a few steps
+from here." (According to Tiffles, the Bartholomew Buildings were only a
+few steps from anywhere, when he wanted to take anybody to them.)
+"Patching will object to bringing in a stranger; but I can pass you off
+as a capitalist, who thinks of taking an interest in the panorama. Good
+joke, that!"
+
+Marcus drew back a little at the joke; but Wesley Tiffles had proved so
+great a relief to his low spirits, that he determined to keep on taking
+him, and expressed his ardent desire to see the panorama.
+
+The couple, arm in arm, sauntered into Broadway, and down that
+thoroughfare. Tiffles nodded to a great many acquaintances, and Wilkeson
+to a very few. People whom Tiffles did not know personally, he had short
+biographies of, and he entertained Marcus with an incessant string of
+anecdotes and memoranda of passers by. The walk was leisurely and
+uninterrupted, with two exceptions, when Wesley Tiffles broke suddenly
+from his companion, rushed into the entry of a photographic
+establishment, and examined numerous square feet of show portraits with
+profound interest. Marcus explained these impulsive movements on the
+supposition that Tiffles sought to escape from approaching duns. He
+noticed that that individual, while observing people who streamed by him
+on either side, kept one eye, as it were, about a block and a half
+ahead. In some parts of the world, Marcus might have objected to walking
+publicly with a man of such an eccentric demeanor. But he was well aware
+that, in New York, a citizen's reputation is not in the least degree
+affected by the company that he keeps.
+
+They soon arrived at the Bartholomew Buildings--a rickety five-story
+edifice, which had been altered from a hotel to a nest of private
+offices. The basement was a restaurant, the first floor a dry goods
+store, and thence to the roof there was a small Babel of trades and
+professions known and unknown. No census taker had ever booked all the
+businesses and all the names under that comprehensive roof.
+
+In the upper story of this building, at the end of a long, hall, the
+floor of which was hollowed in places by the feet of half a century, was
+the room, or office, as he called it, of Mr. Wesley Tiffles. There was
+no number, or sign, on the door, but only a card bearing the
+inscription, in a bold hand, "Back in five minutes." Mr. Tiffles always
+put out this standing announcement whenever he had occasion to absent
+himself from his office for an indefinite period. At the top of the door
+there was a swinging window, which was ever close fastened, and covered
+with four thicknesses of newspapers. Though door and window were shut,
+there came from this room, as if through pores of the wood and the
+glass, a strong odor of tobacco smoke. A voice within could be heard
+softly humming an operatic air.
+
+Wesley Tiffles opened the door with a latch key, saying, "All right!" in
+a loud voice, as he did so. Marcus entered with him into a blue cloud of
+smoke heated to a sickly degree by a small coal stove with a prodigious
+quantity of pipe. Even Marcus's hardened lungs found it difficult
+to breathe.
+
+The room was about twenty feet square. It had been a part of the laundry
+when the building was a hotel. The walls, from the floor to the low
+ceiling, appeared to be hung with a strange, dim tapestry. A second
+glance convinced Marcus Wilkeson that this seeming tapestry was the
+panorama, which was fastened on stretchers along three sides of the
+room, and rolled up in a corner as fast as completed. At the farther end
+of the room, barely visible through the smoke, was the figure of a man
+in a torn and dirty dressing gown, and an enormous black felt hat with a
+huge turn-up brim, of the kind supposed to be worn by the bandits of the
+Pyrenees. The back of the man was turned to Marcus Wilkeson, and he was
+making rapid dabs on the canvas with a long brush, frequently dipping
+into one of a series of pails or pans which stood on the floor by his
+side. He was smoking and humming the operatic air at the same time; and
+he pulled his great slouched hat farther over his eyes, as a signal for
+impertinent curiosity to keep its distance.
+
+Wesley Tiffles whispered something about the eccentricities of genius,
+and then said:
+
+"Mr. Patching. Allow me. Mr. Wilkeson. A capitalist, who thinks of
+taking a small interest in the panorama. Confidential, of course."
+
+The artist turned round during these remarks, and presented the original
+of a portrait which Marcus remembered to have seen--dressing gown, hat,
+and all--in a small print-shop window in the Sixth Avenue. Touching the
+face he might have had doubt, but there was no mistaking the pattern of
+the dressing gown and the amazing hat. He also had a faint recollection
+of the thin face, the Vandyke beard, and the long, tangled hair at Mrs.
+Slapman's, on New Year's, but was not positive as to their identity. Mr.
+Patching's individuality lay chiefly in his hat.
+
+The artist placed a moist hand, with one long finger nail like a claw,
+at the disposal of Marcus Wilkeson. The latter gentleman shook the
+member feebly, and distinctly felt the sharp edge of the long finger
+nail in his palm. It was an unpleasant sensation.
+
+"Happy to meet a _confidential_ friend of Tiffles's," said Patching.
+"Painting panoramas is not exactly what I have been used to. An artist's
+reputation is his capital in trade, you know." He spoke slowly and
+languidly, as if hope and happiness were quite dead within him, and he
+had consented to live on only for the good of high Art.
+
+"I understand," said Marcus. "The secret shall be inviolate."
+
+"Nothing but my old friendship for Tiffles here could possibly have
+induced me to undertake the job. My enemies--and I have them, ha! ha!"
+(he said this bitterly)--"would like nothing better to say of Patching,
+than that he had got down to the panorama line of business. It would be
+a pretty piece of scandal."
+
+"My lips are sealed, sir. But it strikes me, as a casual observer, that
+there is nothing to be ashamed of in this beautiful work of art." Marcus
+Wilkeson had the amiable vice of flattery.
+
+Patching shrugged his shoulders, and made a contemptuous gesture toward
+the canvas with his outstretched brush. "A mere daub," said he. "One
+step higher than painting a barn or a board fence--that's all."
+
+"Yet the true artist adorns what he touches," said Marcus.
+
+Patching accepted the homage calmly, as one who knew that he deserved
+it. "A very just and discriminating remark, sir. I have no doubt that a
+person thoroughly familiar with my style would say, looking at this
+panorama, 'It has the severe simplicity of a Patching.' I consented to
+paint it, as Tiffles well remembers, only on condition that I should not
+wholly abase myself by abandoning the style upon which I have built up
+my reputation."
+
+Tiffles, thus appealed to, corroborated the statement with a solemn bow.
+
+The artist continued: "Fortunately, the subject is one peculiarly
+adapted to my genius. For instance: the desert of Sahara is a dead level
+of sand. It is a perfect type of severe simplicity in the highest sense.
+It exhibits no common display of gorgeous colors, such as poor artists
+and the ignorant crowd rejoice in. As far as the eye can see, there is a
+serene stretch of yellow sand, without even a blade of grass to break
+its awful immensity." (The artist, being on his favorite theme, took his
+pipe out of his mouth for the first time, and spoke with warmth.) "Look
+at that bit of desert, now. Does it not convey a perfect idea of
+solitude and desolation?"
+
+Marcus Wilkeson glanced at about ten feet of straight yellow paint
+(which was all of the desert of Sahara not rolled up in the canvas), and
+said that it did--which was perfectly true.
+
+"There are one hundred feet more, which you don't see, just like it.
+Another artist would have put in an oasis, or a stray hyena, or the
+bleached bones of an unfortunate traveller. _I_ did not. Why? Another
+would have worked up a sunset, or a moonrise, or a thunder storm, to
+give variety to the sky. _I_ did not. Why? The sky over my desert is an
+uninterrupted blue. There is not even a bird in it. There is nothing, in
+short, either on the ground or in the air, to take away the mind of the
+spectator, for one moment, from the sublime idea of a desert--an object
+which, considered aesthetically, is one of the grandest in the universe.
+This is severe simplicity. It is the highest school of Art."
+
+"And the cheapest," observed Tiffles; "which is an important
+consideration when you have an acre or two of canvas to paint. It would
+cost a deal more to put in the sun and moon, travelling caravans, and
+other objects of interest, here and there."
+
+"Incidentally it may be the cheapest," said Patching. "But that is a
+question for capitalists, and not for artists to determine. True Art
+never thinks of the expense."
+
+"It always seemed to me to be the easiest school of Art," said Marcus
+Wilkeson. "I suppose, now, that you can dash off twenty or thirty rods
+of this a day."
+
+Patching smiled with a lofty pity. "So I can. Not because it is the
+easiest, though--far from it; but because I happen to have a genius for
+quick and sure touches. You, not being a professional artist, think the
+execution of that scrap of desert and sky an easy matter. Perhaps you
+fancy that you could do it." There was the least infusion of satire in
+the artist's tone.
+
+"Oh, no!" replied Marcus Wilkeson, who ever shrank from wounding the
+self-love of a fellow creature. "I am not rash enough to suppose that I
+could do it. I merely observed that it seemed--to my inexperienced
+eyes--an easy matter. A few strokes of yellow paint here, for sand, and
+a few strokes of blue paint there, for sky. But I am not even an
+amateur, and so my opinion goes for nothing."
+
+"I admire your frankness," said Patching. "Now let me convince you
+practically. Be good enough to stand near this window with me."
+
+Marcus moved to the spot indicated by the artist.
+
+"Here," said Patching, "you are at about the same distance from the
+desert as the front row of spectators will be. Now look at it
+critically."
+
+Marcus shaded his eyes with his left hand, cocked his head over his
+right shoulder, in the true critical style, and gazed on the scene.
+
+"Do you see the harmony--the TONE, I may say--in the desert?" asked
+Patching, after a short pause.
+
+"I think I do," responded Marcus, willing to oblige the artist.
+
+"And the spiritual, or INNER meaning of the sky?"
+
+"Ye-yes. It is quite perceptible."
+
+"These are the effects of severe simplicity. But you must understand
+that a single mis-stroke of the brush would have spoiled all the harmony
+in the desert, or reduced the sky to a mere inexpressive field of blue
+vapor. Why? Genius alone can achieve such grand results by such
+apparently simple means. You comprehend?"
+
+"Perfectly," said Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"Then I shall take a real pleasure in showing you more of the panorama
+which is already completed and rolled up. With this idea of severe
+simplicity in your mind, you will be prepared to appreciate the work,"
+
+"I believe I have already remarked, that Mr. Wilkeson is a capitalist,
+and comes here expressly to look at the panorama," said Tiffles; with a
+wink at the artist.
+
+"With every respect for him as a capitalist," returned Patching, "I see
+in him only the ingenuous student of Art, whom it is a happiness
+to teach."
+
+The first instalment was a continuation of the desert with which Marcus
+had been already regaled. Patching begged him to observe the unfaltering
+harmony of the sand, and the protracted spirituality of the sky. Then
+came a jungle.
+
+"You will note the severe simplicity here," observed Patching, "No
+meretricious effects. Nothing but strokes of green paint, up and down,
+representing the density of an African jungle. Yet how admirably these
+seemingly careless strokes, laid on by the hand of genius, convey the
+idea of DEPTH! You do not fail to notice the DEPTH, I presume?"
+
+"I see it," said Marcus.
+
+"_That_ is severe simplicity," replied the artist.
+
+At this point, Marcus noticed a brown something bearing a strong
+resemblance to the swamp stalk, known among boys as the cattail. "Excuse
+my ignorance of African plants," said he; "but what is that?"
+
+The artist smiled. "Another happy illustration of my theory," said he.
+"It is the tail of a lion bounding through his native jungles. Why? The
+effect of suggesting the lion, so to speak, is much more thrilling than
+that of painting him at full length. Genius accomplishes by hints what
+mere talent fails to achieve by the utmost elaboration. You will not
+deny that that vague revelation of the lion's tail inspires a feeling of
+mystery and terror, which would not be caused by a full-length portrait
+of that king of beasts?"
+
+Marcus Wilkeson did not deny it, but said that perhaps everybody could
+not identify the object as a lion's tail.
+
+"That has all been thought of," said Tiffles. "I shall explain the
+panorama, you must understand. When I come to the lion's tail, I shall
+tell the audience what it is, and go on to give a full account of the
+lion, and his ferocious habits. This will gratify the women and small
+boys quite as much as seeing the lion _in propria persona_."
+
+"Precisely. Very good," was the laughing acknowledgment. "And what is
+that thing, twisted like a piece of grapevine above the tall grass at
+this point?"
+
+"The trunk of an elephant. Look a little farther on, as the canvas
+unrolls, and you will observe the white tusk of a rhinoceros protruding
+from the jungle with wonderful effect. Why? The two animals are
+advancing toward each other for mortal combat."
+
+"I shall describe their terrific struggles," interrupted Tiffles. "Have
+read up Buffon for it."
+
+"More lions' and elephants' tails, you observe," continued the artist;
+"also more rhinoceroses' tusks. It is well to have enough of them, to
+illustrate the teeming life of the African jungle. Also the head of a
+boa constrictor. Likewise the tail of one. Here we come to a change of
+scene. Mark how wonderfully a few strokes of dark-green paint, put on by
+the hand of genius, impart the idea of a pestiferous swamp. That
+odd-looking object, like a rock, is the head of a hippopotamus. A few
+feet beyond, you notice two things like the stumps of aquatic weeds.
+Those are the tails of two hippopotamuses engaged in deadly strife at
+the bottom of the swamp. The heads of crocodiles are thrust up here and
+there. Severe simplicity again."
+
+The panorama, from thence nearly to the end of it--or rather the
+beginning--was a repetition of jungles and deserts, varied by an
+occasional swamp, all diversified with the heads and tails of indigenous
+animals. The last hundred feet was the river Gambier, over which
+Patching had introduced a sunrise of the most gorgeous description, at
+the earnest request of Wesley Tiffles.
+
+Patching explained: "In my opinion, such effects are tawdry, and detract
+not only from the severe simplicity, but from the UNITY which should
+pervade a painting of this description. Of course, I wash my hands of
+all these innovations upon the province of high Art."
+
+"And I cheerfully shoulder them," said Tiffles. "I know what the public
+want. They want any quantity of sunsets, crocodiles, lions, and other
+objects of interest. If we had time and money to spare, and I could
+overcome Patching's scruples--do you understand?--I would put 'em in
+twice as thick. Men of genius, like Patching, cannot be expected to be
+practical."
+
+The artist shrugged his shoulders, and smiled.
+
+Tiffles then repeated his invitation to Marcus to accompany him on his
+first expedition into the interior of New Jersey; but Marcus positively
+declined. Tiffles said he would send him a note a day or two before the
+panorama started, and hoped that Marcus would conclude to go, just for
+the fun of the thing.
+
+Marcus then shook hands with Patching--who made his long finger nail
+amicably felt--and with Tiffles, and withdrew to the entry, followed by
+the latter individual.
+
+Tiffles closed the door. "By the way," said he, as if the thought
+occurred to him then for the first time, "can you spare thirty-five
+dollars to-day? Pay you on the--let me see--on the first of next month.
+By that time the panorama will be fairly under headway, and coining
+money." (Tiffles always fixed his days of payment with great
+particularity.)
+
+Marcus, without saying a word, produced his pocket book, and counted out
+thirty-five dollars. Tiffles had already borrowed from Overtop and
+Maltboy, but had generously spared the oldest of the three bachelors.
+Marcus felt that his time had come, and he would not meanly avoid his
+destiny. He placed the money in Tiffles's hand.
+
+"Give you my note?" asked Tiffles.
+
+"Oh, no!" said Marcus; "make it a matter of honor."
+
+Tiffles pocketed the funds, placed his hand over his heart, and replied
+that it should be. "But, now I think of it," he suddenly added, "I want
+exactly sixty-three dollars--do you understand?--to see me through with
+this panorama. Suppose you make it twenty-eight dollars more."
+
+Marcus smiled, and said that he didn't understand; whereat Tiffles
+laughed outright, to show that he took no offence at the refusal; and
+creditor and debtor parted with mutual good wishes.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+LOVING AFAR OFF.
+
+The boy Bog had now become, professionally, a creature of the night. He
+was abroad at the, same hours as the burglars and garroters, and other
+owls and weasels of society. Fink & Co. (Bog was the Co.) had secured
+the bill posting for three theatres and one negro-minstrel hall. This
+they called their heavy business. Carrying the huge damp placards, had
+already given to Bog's shoulders a manifest tendency to roundness, which
+he was constantly trying to overcome by straightening up. Fink, who was
+the veteran bill poster of the town, was as round shouldered as a hod
+carrier. But Bog thought of somebody, and stood as nearly erect as
+he could.
+
+The firm also obtained rather more than their share of ordinary bill
+posting, from doctors, drygoods dealers, and other people who find their
+profit in continually addressing the public from the summit of a dead
+wall, or the muddy level of the curbstones. This they called their light
+business. As it required neither strength nor practised dexterity of
+manipulation, the firm intrusted it to assistants.
+
+There were a dozen of these, all stout, hulking young fellows nearly as
+old as Bog. They took a fancy to bill posting, and worked industriously
+and faithfully at it, because it was nocturnal, mysterious, romantic.
+The half dollar which they each received for a night's labor, enabled
+them to lounge about the streets all day in glorious indolence.
+Sometimes there was a prodigious rush of business, and then the firm
+were obliged to hire an extra force of boys.
+
+Once, when a quack undertook to take the public by storm with his "New
+and Sure Cure for Dyspepsia," Fink & Co. put a colored poster as large
+as a dining table on every wall and high fence below Sixty-first street;
+small oblong bills every ten feet along the curbstones of Broadway,
+Bowery, Wall street, Fulton street, Cortlandt street, and Third, Fourth,
+Fifth, Sixth, Eighth, Madison, and Lexington Avenues; besides throwing
+cheap circulars, folded, into the front yards of about four thousand
+residences in the fashionable quarters of the town--all in a single
+night. This immense job took one hundred boys.
+
+Bog had been in this partnership since the first of January. It was now
+near the close of March. The firm had been very successful. Bog had
+comfortably supported himself and his aunt (whose rheumatism got worse
+in steady proportion as his business improved), and had invested more
+than two hundred and fifty dollars in a Wall-street savings bank.
+
+With this money at his disposal, Bog might have thrown away the greasy
+cap and old coat and trowsers, spotted with paste, in which he pursued
+his occupation. But when Bog was at his business, he was not above his
+business. And he felt none the less attached to his old clothes because
+they were two inches too short in the legs and arms, and pinched him a
+little in all directions.
+
+But Bog had a better suit, made of neat gray cloth, which he wore upon
+occasions. These occasions happened daily between three and four P.M.
+During that interval, it always fell out that Bog had no work to do
+which he could not postpone as well as not. And whether it rained or
+shone, the occasions brought him, like an inexorable fate, through the
+street where Miss Pillbody's school was situated. He would first stride
+smartly up the opposite sidewalk, whistling, and cast ardent glances at
+the lower windows of Miss Pillbody's school, shaded by green curtains
+with gold borders.
+
+After going two blocks in that direction, he would cross the street,
+whistling yet, and march boldly up the other sidewalk, past Miss
+Pillbody's school, as on an enemy. But if there had been anybody to
+watch him closely--as there was not on that thronged street--that body
+would have seen that Bog's cheeks began to blush, and his eyes to be
+cast down, and his whistle to be fainter, as he hurried by the neat
+three-story brick building with the polished doorplate and
+handsome curtains.
+
+Then he would loiter for a while in front of McFeeter's grocery, two
+corners remote, and gaze from that safe distance with intrepidity upon
+the abode of enchantment; after which he would screw his courage up to
+the point of marching past the house back and forth again, and would
+then resume his position at McFeeter's, and wait until four P.M., or
+about that time, when the envied door of Miss Pillbody's establishment
+would open, and an angel would dazzle upon his sight, with a music book
+in her hand instead of a harp, and a jaunty little chip bonnet on her
+head instead of a golden crown. If the harp and crown had suddenly taken
+their proper places, and a pair of spangled wings had blossomed right
+out of her shoulders, and the radiant creature, thus equipped, had
+spread her pinions and soared up to heaven, the boy Bog would hardly
+have been surprised. As this angel came down the happy front steps to
+the blessed pavement (Bog's mind supplying these adjectives), Bog would
+color up, and sneak off at his best walking pace in the opposite
+direction. He felt that, if Pet ever saw him, and should ask him what he
+was doing in that neighborhood, he should melt away in perspiring
+confusion on the spot.
+
+He called at Mr. Minford's twice a week, to indulge in the hollow form
+of asking if he could do anything for him. There he confronted Pet, with
+that trembling figure and those averted eyes which an inexperienced
+thief may show before the man that he has robbed. But Pet knew not of
+the adoring spy.
+
+One afternoon, the boy Bog had made his second detour, and was
+approaching the corner of the favored block, when a novel idea struck
+him. The very night before, Bog had posted bills of the play, "Faint
+Heart Ne'er Won Fair Lady." The gigantic lettering arose in his mind's
+eye, like the cross in Constantine's. He had never seen the drama, and
+he did not know to what extent Ruy Gomez pushed his audacity, and won
+the Countess by it. But the name of the drama held the moral of it; and
+the moral, as applied to Bog's case, was: "Stop at this corner, and take
+a good view of the, house." To do this, in Bog's opinion, was the height
+of boldness. But he thought of the huge parti-colored lettering, and
+he did it.
+
+He stopped at the corner, and leaned recklessly against a hydrant. He
+looked at the house with a deliberation that amazed himself. At the same
+time, as a matter of instinctive caution, he kept his left leg well out
+toward the side street, so that he might retreat, should the door
+suddenly open and disclose the seraphic vision. He consulted his large
+bull's-eye silver watch (a capital timekeeper), and found that it was
+half past three o'clock, and he never knew her to be out before four.
+
+This reflection emboldened him. "Faint Heart Ne'er Won Fair Lady," he
+thought again, and brought back his left leg to an easy position,
+crossing it with his right one against the hydrant. Then he feasted,
+with strange composure, upon the house.
+
+Neither Bog nor a much wiser metaphysician could explain it; but the
+house, and all around it, seemed to be glorified by the loved one
+within. The newly painted door was bright with love; the polished
+doorplate and bell handle glistened with love. The name Pillbody looked,
+somehow, musical and winning, because the owner of that name was the
+teacher and dear companion of Pet. The carved stone roses over the door
+seemed to be truly the emblems of love. It was a silly notion; but, in
+Bog's eyes, love imparted a not unpleasant expression to the grim lions'
+faces that looked down from the roof. But the green window curtains with
+gold borders were the most significant symbols of love, in his eyes. Bog
+felt that curtains of any other color would be wholly out of place in
+that house. The patch of a garden, scarcely bigger than a bathroom, in
+front of the house; the single fir tree that grew up in the middle of
+it; the black iron railing; the door steps, and the pavement--all took
+their share of beatitude from the joy within. Bog could hear love rustle
+in the boughs of the young maple, that stood in its long green case like
+a fancy boot top, at the edge of the sidewalk.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+LEGERDEMAIN.
+
+As Bog was resting against the hydrant, absorbed in this delicious
+revery, and totally indifferent to the consequences, he was startled by
+a slight tap on the shoulder. He turned quickly, and saw--the man he
+hated--the man who pretended (Bog would never admit that it was more
+than a pretence) to save Pet from the falling boards.
+
+"Well," said Bog, looking on this man as his mortal enemy, "What do you
+want of me?" He spoke in the gruff, defiant manner peculiar to children
+of the city.
+
+The man's livid face and lead-colored eyes and white teeth all combined
+in a reassuring smile. "Nothing," said he, "my good fellow, but to do
+an errand."
+
+"I say, now, who'd you take me for, hey?" answered Bog, shaking his head
+at the man, and feeling a tremendous desire to knock his shining
+hat off.
+
+The man looked up and down Bog's cheap gray suit, and at his neatly
+polished shoes and his clean slouching cap, and then said:
+
+"No offence meant, my lad. But I thought you wouldn't object to earning
+a quarter. You're only to deliver a letter at that house; that's all."
+He pointed to Miss Pillbody's.
+
+"Hey--what house?" asked Bog, turning pale, with a strange and jarring
+combination of rage, jealousy, envy, and insulted dignity.
+
+"The one with the bright doorplate, green curtains and gold borders. I
+thought you were looking at it as I came up."
+
+"N-no, I wasn't. And what if I was, hey?"
+
+"It strikes me you're rather touchy, my young friend," said the man,
+with his conciliatory smile. "Here's the letter, now, and a quarter.
+It's only a few steps. No answer required."
+
+As Bog caught sight of the letter, done up in the long, rakish envelope
+which had just begun to come into fashion, and faintly perfumed, a lucky
+thought occurred to him.
+
+The man saw that he wavered. "Only a step," said he. "And here is the
+quarter." He offered it to Bog between a thumb and finger.
+
+"Why don't you deliver the letter yourself?" asked Bog.
+
+"Oh! oh! for family reasons," answered the man, hesitating. "Miss
+Pillbody there is my aunt, and the lady to whom this letter is addressed
+is my cousin. The old woman and I have had a sort of falling out about
+the young one, you see. These little difficulties will occur in the
+best-regulated families. Come, take the letter. I'm in a hurry."
+
+Bog allowed the letter to be thrust into his hand. He looked at it, and
+saw, as he expected, that it was addressed to "Miss Minford, Present."
+The direction was in a beautiful commercial hand, which was at once
+more hateful in his eyes than the most crabbed of writing.
+
+"All right," said he. "I'll deliver it. Poh! never mind the quarter. I
+won't take it." Bog moved toward the house as he spoke.
+
+"You're a queer fellow, but a good one. Well, you'll accept my thanks,
+at any rate."
+
+He waited at the hydrant until Bog had delivered the letter.
+
+Bog walked straight to the house, and up the steps, although his face
+was pale, and his knees trembled.
+
+He rang the bell with a decisive pull, and, as he did so, glanced at the
+strange man, who nodded approvingly at him.
+
+He suddenly turned his back on the strange man. With a quick movement of
+the fingers of his right hand, he thrust the letter up his coat sleeve:
+The next instant he whipped a handkerchief out of an inside breast
+pocket, and, with it, a stray copy of a new "Dentifrice" circular, which
+he had been distributing the night before. This circular was folded to
+about the size and shape of the letter. With the handkerchief he wiped
+his face, upon which there were real drops of sweat. The circular he
+slipped into his right hand, and then turned toward the strange man
+again, to show that he still held the letter. This bit of legerdemain
+took about three seconds.
+
+In three seconds more, Bog heard footsteps approaching in the entry.
+What if his angel should come to the door? The thought sent a horrible,
+sickly sensation all over him, and the solid rock seemed to tremble
+beneath his feet.
+
+The door opened, and something quite the opposite of an angel presented
+itself. It was Bridget; and her red hair was dishevelled, her face
+flushed to the parboiled tint, and her dress uncommonly damp and frowsy.
+A mop which she held in her hand explained everything.
+
+"A circular, if you please," said Bog, in a quivering voice, poking the
+folded paper at her.
+
+"A succular, is it? Miss Peelbody told me not to take any succulars for
+her. So 'way wid ye." Bridget put her hand on the door, and was about to
+swing it to.
+
+"It isn't for Miss Pillbody at all," said Bog, fearful lest the strange
+man should see it refused, "but for your own pretty self."
+
+Bridget smiled, for she was conscious that the compliment was deserved.
+She relaxed her hand on the door. "Fat is it?" said she.
+
+"Hush!" said Bog, in a whisper; "a circular about the rights of
+servants, issued by the 'Servants' Mootual Protecting Society.'" (Bog
+thought of the name on the spur of the moment.) "Please take it--quick."
+
+Bridget snatched the circular out of his hand, and was about to look at
+it, bottom side up, for she had not yet attained to the mystery of
+reading, when the musical voice of Miss Pillbody was heard at the back
+of the entry. "Bridget--what is wanted, Bridget?"
+
+"Nothing ma'am, but one of these succular men. Bad luck to him! Here,
+now, take it."
+
+She made a feint of handing back the circular to Bog, but concealed it,
+with the other hand, in her capacious bosom.
+
+"Heaven bless ye!" said she, in a low voice, and then slammed the door
+in his face.
+
+Bog came down the door steps quickly, and saw the strange man make a bow
+and a gesture of gratitude at him, and then disappear suddenly round the
+corner. Bog's first impulse was to follow him at a distance; but his
+curiosity to inspect the slender, perfumed letter, overcame it.
+
+When Bog reached the awning in front of McFeeter's store--a sort of
+haven or putting-in place for him--he pulled out the letter, and was
+about to read it. Then it occurred to him that the situation was too
+much exposed. The strange man might come back, and see him with the open
+letter in his hand. Bog would have enjoyed a personal collision with him
+on any pretext; but to be caught in the act of reading the letter, would
+spoil the strategical advantage that Bog now had over him.
+
+Bog moved on down a side street, and took his stand behind a huge
+wooden column surmounted by a gilded mortar and pestle. Here he was
+about to rip open the envelope, but a glance across the street
+discovered a policeman looking at him. Bog felt guilty and awkward. He
+coughed, and thrust the letter into his pocket, and moved on again. The
+exciting events of the morning had made Bog intensely nervous. He did
+not stop this time until he had gained his home.
+
+His aunt was sitting in the front room, reading a book through a huge
+pair of silver-rimmed spectacles. There was a thick fold of flannel
+about her neck, and she smelt strongly of embrocation. As Bog rushed
+into the room, she groaned audibly, and laid down the book, as if it
+were a wicked enjoyment.
+
+"I'm so bad to-day, Bog," said she. "Them shootin' pains'll be the death
+of me."
+
+Bog responded not a word, but dashed across the apartment, and, entering
+his little sleeping room, closed the door, and bolted it.
+
+"Unfeelin' creetur!" said his aunt. She stopped groaning, and took up
+her book and read again.
+
+Bog seated himself on his hair trunk, and drew out the letter. There was
+a slight discussion within him on the abstract question of his right to
+open it. After turning it over twice, the question was decided in the
+affirmative. He slit the envelope with his thumb, and brought to light a
+billet faultlessly written, as follows:
+
+"Frederick Lynville begs to present his compliments to Miss Minford, and
+to assure her, from the depths of his heart, that his feelings toward
+her are only those of the purest admiration for the matchless charms of
+her mind and person. He takes this method of explaining himself, because
+he has observed with great sorrow that Miss Minford has shown a desire
+to avoid him on several recent occasions, when they have accidentally
+met in the street. It was Mr. Lynville's blessed privilege, under
+Providence, to save Miss Minford's life; but he would not be selfish and
+base enough on that account to obtrude himself on Miss Minford's notice.
+Mr. Lynville would die sooner than be guilty of that discourtesy. He is
+not presumptuous enough to ask an answer to this letter. His only object
+in writing it, is to inform Miss Minford that he will not venture again
+upon the impropriety of speaking to her first when they next meet. Miss
+Minford will therefore be free to drop his acquaintance, or continue it,
+as she thinks best. Whatever fate she may decide for him, her happiness
+will still be his constant prayer."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Bog was ill versed in the art of complimentary letter writing. But the
+villany here seemed to be clumsily concealed. That the letter was full
+of danger to the object of his boyish idolatry, he had no doubt.
+
+But why did Pet avoid this Frederick Lynville? Did she really dislike
+him? Or----. The thought of his own shyness toward the beautiful girl
+came into his mind like a flash. To avoid might be--to love.
+
+The poor boy dropped the letter, and covered his face with his hands,
+and wept.
+
+Love is not always selfish; and goodness is sometimes its own reward. In
+that bitter hour of his first real misery, Bog did not regret his
+kindness to the Minfords, or take credit to himself for having nobly
+concealed from their knowledge those little weekly gifts of money which
+he sent to them through the mail, when they were in poorer
+circumstances. He was not for a moment base enough to think that Pet
+would look with kinder eyes on him, if she but knew of his secret
+benefactions--which, up to this time, neither she nor her father had
+suspected, and which they would never learn from his lips.
+
+
+
+BOOK SIXTH.
+
+MYSTERIES OF THE NIGHT.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE UNKNOWN HAND.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson made no effort to discover the writer of the anonymous
+letter, because he knew that such an effort would be in vain. He called
+on Mr. Minford once in two or three days now. The inventor always took
+occasion to refer to the letter, and assured Marcus that it was not
+worth remembering, or talking about. "Why, then, did he talk about it?"
+Marcus asked himself. His eyes were not blind to watchful and suspicious
+glances which the old man directed to him, at times, under cover of
+those shaggy, overhanging eyebrows. Nor could he help noticing a strange
+reserve in the bearing of Pet toward him. It was not mere modesty, or
+timid gratitude, but DOUBT, as he read the signs. Marcus was convinced
+that the father had put his child on guard against something, though he
+might not have mentioned the existence of the anonymous letter. This
+thought distressed him acutely.
+
+But his troubles, as well as his joys, he kept to himself. The miser
+puts his broken bank notes and his good gold under the same lock
+and key.
+
+One evening, early in April, Overtop and Maltboy observed a peculiar
+expression of sadness on the face of their friend. He had eaten nothing
+at dinner, but had drunk more than his usual allowance of sherry. He had
+kept his eyes fixed on the table as in a revery, and had scarcely spoken
+a word. Miss Wilkeson, in her solemn state opposite the boiled chickens,
+was hardly less social.
+
+After dinner, Marcus took to his pipe with a strange sullenness, and
+smoked furiously. His two friends, closely regarding him, saw that he
+was unhappy, but wisely forbore to make him more unhappy still by
+obtruding their condolence on him. The day had been rainy and cold. They
+knew that Marcus's spirits were barometrically sensitive to the weather,
+like those of most persons who look at it through a window.
+
+They had noticed, as they came home, that he was reading that sweetest
+of elegies, the "In Memoriam" of Tennyson. And the two friends thought
+that the melancholy weather and the melancholy poem together fully
+accounted for the gloom on his brow.
+
+Marcus sat for some minutes meditating. Then he heaved a sigh, which was
+distinctly audible to his two friends. Then he left the room without
+saying a word, and went up stairs.
+
+Presently he was heard to come down; but, instead of returning to the
+little parlor, he went into the street, and closed the door with a sharp
+slam. At the same moment, the cold rain of the April night beat noisily
+against the window.
+
+"Sly old fellow!" said Maltboy.
+
+"Up to something, depend on it," said Overtop.
+
+Marcus walked rapidly toward the inventor's house. "My fate is decided
+to-night," he muttered.
+
+His long strides soon brought him to the house. The old building wore a
+gloomy look. He did not speculate on the reason of this. It was probably
+because there was no light visible in any of the front windows, and very
+little light in the street lamps. The gas burned low and blue, and
+flickered in the wind.
+
+Ringing the bell, Marcus was admitted by one of the numerous children
+belonging to somebody in the house (Marcus could never determine to
+whom), and walked up to the inventor's room. His heart beat with strange
+emotion as he rapped at the door. For a moment he was sorry that he
+had come.
+
+"Come in," said the inventor, in a voice more sepulchral than usual.
+
+Marcus entered the apartment. The inventor received him with a feeble
+shake of the hand, bearing no resemblance to the hearty one which he
+used to bestow in the early days of their acquaintance. Marcus noticed
+that Mr. Minford's hand was hot. He also observed that his eyes were
+preternaturally lustrous, and that the circles under them were deep and
+dark. His cheeks were deathly pale, saving a little red spot in the
+centres. He looked like a man in a state of fearful mental exaltation
+and nervous excitement.
+
+Marcus was not in the habit of worrying people upon the subject of their
+ill health; but the inventor looked so palpably bad, that Marcus could
+not forbear to say, in a tone of anxiety, "You are unwell, sir."
+
+"Oh, no! Quite well, I assure you," said the inventor, with a weary
+smile. "Though I should be sick, perhaps, but for the glorious hope that
+bears me up. I have not eaten, or slept, for forty-eight hours."
+
+"But, my dear sir, this is trifling with your health."
+
+"I acknowledge it. But we must make sacrifices, if we would master the
+UNKNOWN. Newton lived on bread and water when he wrote his immortal
+Principia. He condemned himself to the coarse fare of a prison, in order
+that his intellect might soar untrammelled to the stars. I have improved
+on Newton--I eat nothing. As for sleep, I grudge a single hour of it
+which comes between me and the completion of my great work."
+
+"But how long can you stand this dreadful strain upon your powers?"
+
+"Till daylight to-morrow, with safety. By that time I shall have
+overcome the last obstacle. Of this I am confident. Then, ho! for
+unbounded wealth and undying fame. The toil has been severe, but the
+reward will be glorious."
+
+"I congratulate you," said Marcus, "on the near approach of your final
+triumph. And, in order that I may not delay you a single moment, I will
+bid you 'good-night.'" Marcus rose, but he hoped that the inventor would
+ask him to stay.
+
+The inventor did so. "Pray don't hurry, Mr. Wilkeson; I would like to
+have a brief conversation with you. A few minutes only." He drew a chair
+to the side of Marcus, and seated himself.
+
+"Mr. Wilkeson," he said, in a deliberate voice, as if he were repeating
+carefully-considered words, "it is unnecessary for me to say that I have
+the highest opinion of you. Providence seems to have sent you to me at a
+time when I was in the greatest need. You saved me from starving. The
+world will be as much indebted to you for my grand invention, as it was
+to the generous patronage of Queen Isabella for the discovery
+of America."
+
+"Pooh!" interrupted Marcus, blushing.
+
+"The praise is none too high," continued the inventor. "It is true, I
+have repaid your advances of money tenfold, by giving you an interest in
+my future but certain fortune. But that does not diminish my gratitude."
+
+Marcus knew that this flattering exordium meant something serious. It
+was a favorite theory of his, that danger, or any kind of anticipated,
+disagreeable thing, was best met halfway. So he said, with a feeble
+attempt at a smile:
+
+"I infer from this ominous opening that you have received another lying
+anonymous letter about me. If I am right, Mr. Minford, be good enough to
+let me see it at once, according to your promise."
+
+"You have guessed correctly, Mr. Wilkeson. I have received a second
+anonymous letter, which I intended showing to you after a further brief
+explanation. But I can readily appreciate your anxiety to read it
+without delay. Here it is." He drew forth a letter, and handed it
+to Marcus.
+
+Marcus immediately recognized the envelope and the address as similar
+to those of the first letter, which he still had in his possession.
+
+He pulled the letter nervously from its yellow sheath, and read as
+follows:
+
+     MR. MINFORD:
+
+     DEAR SIR,--Pardon me for intruding on you a second time. But,
+     as a friend of virtue, I must warn you of continued danger to
+     your daughter from the acquaintance of Mr. Wilkeson, your
+     pretended benefactor. If you are any longer in doubt as to
+     the vile intentions of this man, conceal yourself from
+     observation within sight of Miss Pillbody's school, any fair
+     afternoon, about half past two o'clock, and watch his
+     actions. If his suspicious conduct, at that time and place,
+     does not give a sufficient significance to my warnings, then
+     take the trouble to go to ----, Westchester Co., where he was
+     born, and search into his infamous history. Take heed--I warn
+     you again--lest, in your devotion to science, you forget that
+     you are a father.
+
+     ONE WHO WOULD SHIELD THE INNOCENT.
+
+While reading this letter, Marcus was conscious that the eyes of the
+inventor were fixed piercingly upon him. That consciousness caused his
+head to bow, and his cheeks to crimson with shame. It is the curse of
+this morbid sensibility, that righteous indignation at a foul slander
+upon one's good name springs up only after the victim has shown all the
+accepted evidences of guilt.
+
+There was one reason why a man much less sensitive than Marcus should
+have been thrown off his balance by this letter. It was a fact that
+every afternoon, at half past two o'clock, rain or shine, with
+bachelor-like punctuality, he passed up and down in front of Miss
+Pillbody's school, and looked sentimentally at the closed blinds,
+thinking unutterable things. He was also addicted to standing at the
+hydrant on the corner, and gazing hard at the house, wishing that he
+could see through its brick walls. Then he would cross the street, and
+pace up and down on that side, taking views of the house at every
+variety of angle. This was precisely what the boy Bog did daily about an
+hour and a half later. Now, although Marcus felt, in his heart, that
+these pedestrian exercises--absurd to everybody but a lover--were
+perfectly harmless in their purpose and effect, he was aware that, to a
+man like Mr. Minford, looking at them suspiciously, they would appear to
+be connected with some stealthy and base design.
+
+As to the imputations upon his former history, Marcus could freely
+challenge the closest scrutiny; which is more than most men can do into
+that long record of juvenile frailties and escapades which ushers in the
+sober book of manhood. But here again the devil of sensitiveness
+asserted his supremacy. Marcus had had a twin brother (who died years
+before), a duplicate of himself in all respects but two. Marcus was
+quiet, studious, honest, and frank; while Aurelius was quiet, studious,
+less honest, and infinitely crafty. Marcus had, on several occasions in
+his boyhood, been accused of petty offences which Aurelius had
+committed, but which that cunning youth had unblushingly denied. These,
+so far as Marcus supposed, were nothing more serious than robbing
+orchards or melon patches. Still it was possible that some graver
+wrong--more worthy of the title "infamous"--committed by his wild,
+shrewd brother, might be brought to light by some deep explorer among
+the traditions of his native village, and charged upon himself. This
+possibility, and the difficulty of refuting a serious accusation under
+such circumstances, brought a second flush of guilt to the face of
+Marcus Wilkeson as he read the letter.
+
+These harassing thoughts, which fill so much space, written out, are but
+a small part of those which were suggested with electric suddenness.
+
+Marcus's first impulse was to say: "I love your daughter, Mr. Minford,
+with my whole heart and soul. It is my first and my only love, singular
+though this confession may sound from the lips of a man of thirty-six
+years. The proudest and happiest day of my life would be that on which I
+could marry her, with her dear love and your fatherly consent. This
+love, which is as pure as the angelic creature upon whom it is lavished,
+fully explains my visits here, and whatever else is mysterious in my
+conduct. But, before declaring myself to your daughter, or asking her
+hand of you, I have desired to see whether it were possible to inspire
+her with love for a man so much older than herself. For, much as I love
+her, I would not seek to marry her without a return of love--not mere
+respect, esteem, or gratitude. That is the problem I have been waiting
+to solve."
+
+A confession to this effect was on the tip of his tongue. To have made
+it, would have been like tearing open his breast and showing his heart.
+But he would have made it, whatever the pain, if, on looking nervously
+up from the letter, which he had now finished, he had not met the cold,
+searching eyes of the inventor. He instantly shut his lips upon the
+outcoming confession, and said, with as much indifference as he could
+awkwardly assume:
+
+"I hope, sir, you have taken the trouble to investigate these ridiculous
+charges." But Marcus inwardly hoped he had not.
+
+"I have sir," responded the inventor, gravely. "Had the accusations been
+vague, like those in the first letter from this unknown person, I should
+have dismissed them from my mind with a laugh. But they were so
+specific, and the truth or falsity of them was so easily ascertained,
+that I thought it my duty, in justice to my daughter, yourself, and to
+me, to look into them. It was a painful task, but I have done it."
+
+"And what have you learned?" asked Marcus, making a transparent feint to
+look at ease.
+
+"I will tell you frankly; though I wish to say, in advance, that my
+discoveries, though they might justify some suspicion, do not prejudice
+me in the least against you. I have no doubt that you will be able to
+explain everything." But so spoke not the eyes of the inventor.
+
+"Well, then, to make a short story of this unpleasant affair, I have
+watched your promenades in front of Miss Pillbody's school three
+afternoons in succession. I will spare you the details, though, so
+clearly are your movements back and forth imprinted on my memory, that I
+could recount them all to you, if necessary. It is sufficient to say,
+that I am forced to believe that my daughter is the magnet which draws
+you to that neighborhood, and keeps your eyes riveted on that house.
+This is all I have to say on the first point in the letter."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+IN VAIN--IN VAIN.
+
+This was Marcus Wilkeson's golden opportunity, and he manfully
+determined to seize it. But, as he was on the point of blurting out the
+stifled secret, that cold, pale face--which resembled marble in all but
+the drops of sweat upon the brow--chilled him again. At the same moment,
+the hopeless absurdity of love and marriage between a girl of seventeen
+and a man of thirty-six, occurred to him in all its force. Stupidly
+sensitive being that he was, he thought that this icy, intellectual Mr.
+Minford would laugh at him.
+
+"I confess, sir, that these wanderings seem 'singular,' as you term
+them. But all the habits of old bachelors are regarded as singular, I
+believe. Now, it has been my daily habit, since I retired from business,
+to lay down my book at two o'clock, and take a little out-door exercise.
+Miss Pillbody's school is not far from my house; the street is pretty
+clean for New York, and the sidewalks are tolerably dry. Therefore I
+select that neighborhood for my daily walk--my--my 'constitutional,' as
+they call it. If, in so doing, I should occasionally cast my eyes--in
+fits of absent-mindedness, I may say--on Miss Pillbody's school, that
+is not strange, considering--considering the interest that I take in
+your daughter's education. It strikes me, my dear sir, that this seeming
+suspicion is easily cleared up." Marcus smiled to think how adroitly he
+had extricated himself.
+
+But there was no smile on the shroud-colored face of the inventor.
+
+"The explanation is _plausible_" (Mr. Minford emphasized the word), "and
+I will not attempt to set it aside. God alone knows all the motives of
+human action. Now, to the second, and more serious implication of the
+letter. I have visited your native village, and inquired into your early
+history. Though you moved to the city over fifteen years ago, and have
+returned to your birthplace but once since, so far as I could
+ascertain--"
+
+"Allow me," said Marcus. "My absence from my old home may seem strange,
+but it is occasioned by no shame or disgrace. My father, mother, and
+twin brother died and were buried there. By my father's failure, shortly
+before his death, the old family mansion passed out of his hands, and
+was afterward torn down to make room for a railway depot. This
+extinction of my family--for I am now left without a relation in the
+world, excepting a half-sister--and this destruction of our old home,
+have made my native village horrible to me. When I visited the scene of
+desolation, ten years ago, the village seemed to me like a huge
+graveyard, in every part of which some happiness of my boyhood was
+entombed; and I vowed that I would never go near it again. In the matter
+of family recollections, I am exquisitely sensitive."
+
+"I respect your feelings, sir," said the inventor, "and regret that I
+should be the means of reviving these painful recollections. But I have,
+a duty to perform."
+
+"And I will no longer delay you in its performance. Now be kind enough
+to let me know the worst at once. I can stand it." Marcus unconsciously
+sat up more erect, as if to brace himself against a shock.
+
+"On my arrival in the village, my first act was to seek out some of the
+oldest inhabitants. I found that most of them distinctly remembered you,
+and your brother--Aurelius, I think, was his name. You will pardon me
+for telling you the exact result of my inquiries, but I found that these
+old inhabitants, without a single exception, gave you a very bad name,
+and your brother a very good one."
+
+Marcus was about to explain, that his brother and himself were images of
+each other; that the former was crafty, and full of mischief, and that
+he (Marcus) had been made, on fifty occasions, the innocent scapegoat of
+his brother's little offences. But he forbore. He had cheerfully
+received reprimands, and even chastisements, for his brother while
+living; and he would not blacken his memory when dead. He merely smiled
+a sad smile, and said, "Ah?"
+
+"Many of the offences charged against you by these old gossips, were
+petty and excusable. But there were others, committed by you when you
+were at or near manhood, exhibiting, if true--understand, I say, _if_
+true--a moral depravity for which no extenuation can be found. Some of
+the charges were not sustained by adequate proofs, and those I set down
+as idle rumors. But there was one of which the proof was abundant and
+most positive. No less than five persons gave me circumstantial
+accounts--all agreeing with each other--of your betrayal and ruin of
+Lucy Anserhoff."
+
+"Lucy Anserhoff!" echoed Marcus, in real amazement. "I have a faint
+remembrance of an old lady by that name, and a pretty girl who was her
+daughter. But as God is my judge, I never wronged her." Still there was
+that expression of guilt, which did not escape the scrutinizing glance
+of the inventor.
+
+Marcus could have hunted up evidence to transfer the burden of the
+imputed wrong to the memory of the dead Aurelius. But should he commit
+this profanation of the grave--as he regarded it? The voice of brotherly
+love--for he had tenderly loved his erring brother--said, "No." Would
+any amount of proof satisfy the nervous, doubting man before him? He
+feared not. Therefore Marcus Wilkeson did an act of awful solemnity, to
+prove his innocence. And, because the doing of it thrilled his sensitive
+soul, as if he had thrust himself into the terrible presence of the
+Infinite, he weakly supposed that the most suspicious of men would
+unhesitatingly believe him.
+
+He stood up, turned his eyes to the ceiling, raised both hands, and
+said, in a deep, trembling voice:
+
+"May God strike me dead, if I am guilty of this offence, or any like it,
+or of any thought of wrong toward your daughter."
+
+Marc as sat down, pale, and caught his breath quickly. He was
+awestricken by his own act.
+
+"That is a solemn adjuration," said the inventor, after a short pause,
+"and should not be lightly taken."
+
+Marcus looked well at Mr. Minford. Unbelief was written in every hard
+line and wrinkle of that white, deathlike face. "Do you doubt me now?"
+he asked, sharply. His sensitiveness on the subject of personal honor
+and veracity was painfully acute. He had never told a lie in his life.
+
+"Oh! no," replied Mr. Minford; "I do not say that I doubt you" (in a
+tone expressive of the greatest doubt). "I shall be truly glad to
+receive counter proofs from you."
+
+"You have heard my solemn appeal to God, sir. Between gentlemen of honor
+that should be sufficient."
+
+The inventor's thin lips (from which the last drops of blood had
+disappeared within the last half hour) curved in a satirical smile.
+Marcus interpreted it as a reiterated doubt and a sneer upon his honor.
+For the moment he lost control of his temper, and was about to make a
+remark that he would have regretted immediately after, when the door
+yielded to a gentle pressure, and Pet entered the room.
+
+Her face was pale. Her eyes were dull, and the lids hung droopingly,
+weighed down by twenty-four hours of wakefulness by the bedside of her
+sick teacher. The faint blue crescents beneath--those strange shadows
+of the grave, which sometimes seem the deepest when the eyes above are
+giving the brightest light--imparted a frail, delicate beauty to her
+countenance. They were the last master-touches of Nature in working out
+that portraiture of weaned and sleepy loveliness.
+
+As she put her foot in the room, Mr. Minford and his guest telegraphed a
+truce with their eyes, and assumed a cheerful look.
+
+Little Pet timidly ran to her father, and kissed him, and then shook
+hands with Marcus. He observed a shrinking in her touch. She averted
+her eyes.
+
+"Your clothes are damp, and your feet wet, my darling," said the father,
+
+"Are they?" answered Pet, looking down at her saturated garments and
+glistening shoes. "I had not noticed them. Oh! I am so happy that she is
+well now. The doctor called at the house just before I left, and said
+she was out of all danger. He ordered me home."
+
+"Very sensible of the doctor. Another hour of this watching might have
+killed my poor child."
+
+"So I took a last look at my dear teacher--who was asleep--and kissed
+her, and came right away through the rain."
+
+"It was foolish to do that without an umbrella and overshoes, my child.
+But, as you were always forgetful of yourself, your father will not be
+forgetful of you, at any rate." The inventor glanced significantly at
+Marcus. That glance, so full of distrust, entered his soul. He longed to
+say something--if only a word of common civility--to the young girl;
+but he felt that there was now an impassable barrier between them.
+
+"But what is the matter, Pet?" exclaimed the father. She had dropped
+into a chair, and her head fell on one side. He sprang to catch her. So
+did Marcus. But the inventor reached her first, and seized her in his
+arms, directing another of his speaking looks at Marcus.
+
+Pet roused herself at the touch of her father's hands, sat erect, and
+opened her large blue eyes. "I am so sleepy," she said.
+
+"Of course you are, my blessed; and to bed you must go at once. That is
+my prescription. But, first--always first--a cup of tea."
+
+The inventor darted to the stove, snatched up the teapot, poured out a
+cup of the universal restorer, scalding his forefinger in the hurry,
+milked and sugared it just right, and bore it to his daughter, who was
+nodding again. She drank it dutifully, like medicine.
+
+Children do not comprehend tea. We have to grow up to it. It is the
+appointed balm of fatigued and sorrowing middle age.
+
+In its function of medicine, the strong draught revived her, giving a
+twist to her pretty features, and sending a lively shudder through her
+slender frame. Pet rose from her seat quite briskly.
+
+"Now to bed. To bed at once. No delay. And mind you put on all the
+blankets, and your heavy shawl a-top of them."
+
+"Yes, father."
+
+Marcus blushed, twirled his hat, and made a motion toward the door.
+
+"You need not go, Mr. Wilkeson," said the inventor. "I beg that you will
+not. I wish to settle up that little unfinished business with you
+to-night."
+
+Marcus saw that the inventor was in earnest. He coughed, and hesitated
+what to say.
+
+But, before he could say anything, Pet had kissed her father, and said
+"Good-night," in a faint voice, to the guest, and already had her hand
+on the knob of the door which led to her little sleeping room.
+
+"Remember, darling--all the blankets, and your shawl. To-morrow morning
+you will wake up bright and happy, and ready to enjoy a little surprise
+that I shall have for you." He jerked his thumb toward the machine.
+
+Pet understood him, and smiled sadly. "You need bed more than I,
+father," said she.
+
+"Nonsense, child!" replied the old man, with a hollow laugh. "It is not
+for the patient to prescribe to the physician. There, good-night, now."
+
+He kissed her again with more tenderness. "Remember," said he, "there is
+a little surprise in store for you to-morrow."
+
+Pet said, "Heaven bless you, father," murmured another "Good-night," and
+disappeared within her sanctuary, closing the door after her.
+
+"Now, Mr. Wilkeson," said the inventor, "we can finish our
+conversation."
+
+His voice sounded like a voice from the tomb.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+THE CLASHING ORBS.
+
+The rain had ceased, and the moon was out. The dark, massy clouds that
+floated between her and the earth were doing their ghostly,
+phantasmagoric work. At one moment, clear, white light, like a shroud;
+at another moment, darkness, like a pall. An owl, lighting on the spire
+of Grace Church in his flight over the city, might have seen the white
+edge of the shroud, or the black edge of the pall, advancing in
+well-defined lines over the housetops, and the parks, and the two
+rivers, swiftly succeeding each other.
+
+It was as if the mighty invisible demons of the night were capriciously
+trying the effects of cerements on the sleeping city. It was as if they
+were perplexed between the soft beauty of the shroud and the sombre
+majesty of the pall. A woman could not have tried on two shawls more
+often and more indecisively, before making up her mind to buy.
+
+Little Pet's sleeping room, like every room that faced the south, that
+night, was full of strange, spectral effects. The scrolls and the roses
+on the cheap yellow curtains that hung in the windows, were changed to
+hideous faces of variable size and ugliness. Their grotesque shadows on
+the floor mingled with other faces--horrible as antique masks--wrought
+by the magic of the moon from the gigantic flowers that adorned the
+narrow strip of carpet by the bedside. Her dresses, suspended from a row
+of hooks in the corner--and showing, in gentle swells and curves, the
+lithe, graceful form of the little wearer, like moulds,--would have
+looked to any open eye, that dreadful night, like women hanging against
+the wall. This startling idea would have been helped along by two or
+three shadowy bonnets depending from pegs above them. The white
+somethings carelessly tossed over a chair near the head of the bed, were
+no longer the garments of youth, beauty, and innocence, but
+graveclothes, cold, shining, shuddering, in that deathly light. The
+touch of the moon, like the presence of a sexton, suggested mortality.
+
+The narrow, single bed, with its four black posts, looked like the fatal
+trestle, or bier. The slender body which lay upon it was still as death.
+The head nestled motionless in a deep indentation of the pillow. A
+slanting ray of the moon, coming between one of the window curtains and
+the window, fell upon the face, and showed it white and waxen; the lips,
+still red, parted to the gleaming teeth; and the eyes not quite covered
+by the lids. One beautiful round arm curved above her head, and some of
+her soft brown hair rested in the little open palm. The other stretched
+down toward the centre of the bed, as if fearlessly to invite the touch
+of those weird things with which imagination peoples the solemn
+night--which the wakeful eye, in the still, small hours, sees moving in
+the darker corners, or passing swiftly by the bedside, or hovering in
+the air, wearing the semblance of one's dead friends, or filling large
+portions of the room with some formless presence of unutterable
+malignity and woe.
+
+It was only sleep to which the moon thus gave the pale polish of death.
+The gentle murmur of a childish breath broke the silence. The heavy
+bedclothes slowly rose and fell with the mysterious pulsations of warm
+life beneath. At intervals, a shudder shook the little figure of the
+sleeper, her breath came louder and quicker, and her arms moved with
+sudden starts. Pet was dreaming, under the joint influences of an excess
+of blankets and a cup of strong tea.
+
+She was alone in infinite space. Above, below, on all sides, was a
+leaden atmosphere. Neither sun, nor moon, nor stars illumined it, but
+only some dull, phosphorescent light, which seemed to be born of the
+murky, stagnant air. It was such a strange, sickly, wavering gleam as
+she had seen above decaying wood, fish, and other substances. All around
+was absolute stillness. Not a swallow waved his wing nor an insect
+hummed in that barren immensity. Nature was hushed by some deadly spell.
+
+Yet the dread silence portended the near approach of HORRORS. She knew
+what they were, for she had been in this frightful region often before,
+and was familiar with its dread phenomena. They came. They were only two
+little black specks--like motes in the sunbeams--scarcely visible to her
+strained vision at first. She gazed upon them with the fascination of a
+charmed bird on the two small jet eyes of a serpent; but with this
+difference, that she knew the terrible peril that they brought. The
+moment that these two motes became visible to her in that dimly lighted
+mist, they commenced revolving around each other.
+
+They revolved slowly, and increased in size as they rolled on. The
+slowness of the motion and the swelling of the motes were elements of
+horror. But she could not take her eyes from those two black objects
+revolving like binary stars, until her breath should cease to come and
+go, and her heart to beat. As the motes enlarged, their orbits widened.
+And they grew and-grew, performing greater and more awful
+circuits--still slowly, still noiselessly. The eternal, unbroken silence
+was another element of horror. The doomed spectatress of this solemn,
+maddening whirl would fain have shrieked, or even whispered, to break
+the silence, but she could not. Either her powers of articulation had
+disappeared in that region of universal dumbness, or the dead atmosphere
+was waveless, and could vibrate to no sound. She knew, by harrowing
+experience, the scene that was to come, and she prayed inwardly to God
+to strengthen her for it.
+
+The two black objects swelled and swelled in even proportions, until
+they became as large as a full moon just seen above the horizon; then to
+the size of two full moons, and a dozen, and a hundred, and a thousand.
+Still black, still noiseless, still revolving slowly, like a tardy but
+certain doom. Then a quarter of the leaden space was filled with their
+gigantic bodies, and the lurid air was darker. Then a half of the
+heavens was blotted out; She grew faint and sick, as she moved her head
+to the right and left, and up and down, and watched the dizzy
+revolutions of those vast orbs, between which she knew that she was to
+be crushed at last, as by the nether and upper millstones. Her
+inarticulate cries to God were unheard. It seemed as if there were no
+God for that accursed part of the universe.
+
+Majestically, slowly, silently ever, the orbs increased. Two strips of
+the sky could be seen constantly changing positions, but always opposite
+to each other. These were the gaps, fast narrowing, which were to be
+filled up by the swelling worlds before her destruction was
+accomplished. Her long familiarity with the movements of this stupendous
+enginery of death enabled her to calculate to a nicety when the crash
+would come. She lay like the bound victim under the guillotine, watching
+fer the axe to descend.
+
+The blackness of darkness above and beneath and around her ... a
+suffocating compression of the stagnant air ... a thrilling
+consciousness of the close approach of the two cruel orbs.... a
+superlative stillness ... and then a mighty attrition, in which the
+mortal part of the poor girl was about to be ground to atoms, when she
+... awoke.
+
+She threw back the heavy blankets that oppressed her chest, as if
+_they_ were the crushing danger. She looked overhead, expecting to see a
+whirling globe within a foot of her face. But she saw only the ceiling,
+made visible by the pallid light of the room. Then she knew that she was
+in her own little room, and that this frightful adventure was only the
+old, old dream, that came to her two or three times a year, as far back
+as she could remember--the same always, without addition or curtailment.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+A VISION OF HORRORS.
+
+Little Pet was not the least superstitious; because her father had
+taught her from infancy to pay no heed to dreams or signs; and because
+he had allowed no housemaid or fussy old woman to inoculate his young
+daughter with her own senseless and cowardly fears. Pet smiled at the
+momentary terror which the strange old dream had caused, closed her
+eyes, and addressed herself again to sleep. But, first, she drew up the
+weighty blankets over her little frame, as her father had told her to
+do. She had already found out by experience, that a hot application of
+blankets was the best remedy for a young cold.
+
+A low murmur, as of conversation, came from the adjoining room. Then she
+remembered that Mr. Wilkeson was there when she had come to bed. She
+said to herself: "It cannot be late; for he never stops after ten
+o'clock." Then she began to think of some matters which had recently
+perplexed and distressed her greatly. But she was so sleepy, that the
+thoughts came into her little head confusedly, and, several times,
+merged into dreams, and then came out again. The low murmur of the talk
+outside, like the distant hum of a waterfall or a mill, was sedative.
+The act of listening to it--as she did for a few moments with natural
+curiosity--was provocative of sleep.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The conversation suddenly grew louder. The hollow voice of the inventor,
+and the deep bass of Marcus Wilkeson, could be heard alternating
+quickly. These words reached little Pet:
+
+THE INVENTOR. "We have had along conversation, Mr. Wilkeson, and I will
+end it by saying that it is best for us to separate, now and forever."
+
+MARCUS (_bitterly_). "As you please, sir; but it is hard that a man's
+reputation should be at the mercy of any scoundrel who knows how to
+write a libel, and has not courage enough to acknowledge it."
+
+THE INVENTOR (_pettishly_). "I have told you a dozen times, that I
+despise anonymous letter writers. They are ever liars and cowards."
+
+MARCUS. "But you respected this one enough to adopt his suggestions."
+
+THE INVENTOR. "So the magistrate uses hints that may be furnished him by
+professional thieves, for the detection of crime. But he, none the less,
+loathes those who would inform upon their comrades."
+
+MARCUS. "You believe, therefore, only what you have seen or heard for
+yourself."
+
+THE INVENTOR. "Nothing further, I assure you. In all matters of proof,
+it is my nature to be suspicious."
+
+MARCUS. "But none of these accusations against me have been proved."
+
+THE INVENTOR. "Why protract this painful conversation? It is sufficient
+for me to say that we must part.--(_Excitedly_.) Good heavens, sir! am I
+not the guardian of my daughter, and warranted in accepting or rejecting
+acquaintances for her? Must I make long explanations to everybody that I
+don't see fit to admit into my house and my daughter's society? Is not
+this a free country, sir?"
+
+MARCUS _(with deep despair in his voice_). "Perfectly free, sir. I admit
+your rights. And I hereby pledge myself not to intrude upon you or
+her--at least, until you are convinced of the great injustice of your
+conduct toward me, and invite me again to your house. But there is one
+thing more!"
+
+THE INVENTOR (_impatiently_). "One thing more! will this dialogue never
+end? Well, sir. What the devil is it?" Then he added, as if aware of the
+coarseness and gross impropriety of that expression. "Excuse me, sir,
+but it is late, and my machine is waiting."
+
+MARCUS (_slowly and firmly_). "One moment, sir. I have sworn my
+innocence before God, with the most solemn oath known to man. I may have
+misconstrued your remarks, but I thought you still doubted me. It is my
+misfortune to be extremely sensitive upon the point of honor. Having
+relinquished your acquaintance and that of--of--your daughter, it is now
+my duty to ask whether you presume to question my oath?"
+
+THE INVENTOR (_with increased impatience_). "Why should I be bored with
+this cross-examination? I have never said I doubted your oath."
+
+MARCUS (_quickly_). "That is not an answer. Do you believe me, or
+disbelieve me? Am I a liar and perjurer, or not? In one word; yes,
+or no!"
+
+THE INVENTOR (_laughing nervously_). "Will you bully me in my own house,
+sir? There is the door. Out of it!"
+
+There was a noise like the opening of a door.
+
+MARCUS (_between his teeth_). "Never, sir. Never, until you retract your
+imputation upon my honor."
+
+THE INVENTOR (_losing all control of himself_). "Curse your honor. If
+you had been more careful of it in your native village--where you are
+best known--it would not trouble you now. Come, there are the stairs."
+
+MARCUS. "Once more. Do you believe my oath, or not?"
+
+THE INVENTOR (_shouting_). "No! no! a million times, no! since you drive
+me to it. I believe you to be a crafty scoundrel, who has been trying to
+ruin my daughter. Out, sir, now--out!"
+
+Then was a sound of two men clenching, and struggling toward the door.
+A noise followed like that caused by the sharp closing of the door; but
+the two men were still in the room, for their scuffling and their short,
+quick grunts of exertion could be heard with increased distinctness. The
+noise indicated that one was pushing the other toward the centre of the
+room. Then followed the dull, nauseating sound of blows, apparently
+struck with fists upon heads and chests, mingled with noisier but still
+partly suppressed groans, and defiances.
+
+The conversation which preceded this struggle, had come to Pet's ears
+with such distinctness, and made such a terrifying impression upon her
+mind, that it seemed as if she could see the combatants.
+
+At the time when the clenching commenced, the vision was faint, as if
+she were looking into a dark room. But, as the struggle proceeded, the
+room seemed to be gradually lighted up for her; and every grapple, every
+blow, every facial contortion of this horrible contest, were plainly
+visible. And yet she was not in the room, but lying in her little bed,
+bound as in the awful dream of the clashing orbs. She knew she was
+there, and yet she felt that her eyes, all her faculties of observation,
+had been somehow transferred to her father's room, and that she was
+actually seeing and hearing the commission of a murder there.
+
+She tried to cry aloud, but her jaws were closed. She would have risen,
+entered the room, and thrown herself between the frenzied men, but
+neither hand nor foot could she move. Her body was fastened to the bed
+as if with adamantine chains, while her mind and soul were the voiceless
+spectators of a tragedy of which she knew that she was the cause. She
+could not even open her eyes. If she could have loosed but a muscle from
+the rigidity of the trance, she knew that her whole frame would be
+relaxed in an instant. Then she would have bounded--oh! with what
+speed--into the other room, where her immortal part was helplessly
+watching the conflict, and interceded at the risk of her life. Alas!
+Prometheus was tied to the rock not more firmly than she to that bed
+of anguish!
+
+The struggle went on. The inventor, though past the prime of life, and
+worn down by excessive thought, had some strength left. Its duration was
+brief; but it was not to be despised while it lasted. He grasped the
+tall figure of Marcus Wilkeson by the neck with one arm, and with the
+other struck dozens of blows upon his face and chest. The comparative
+youth and freshness of Marcus were unable to free him from the strong
+hold of this vigorous old man. Pangs of terror shot through the heart of
+the poor girl as she saw that her father was about to become a murderer.
+Then the tide of fortune changed. Marcus, bruised and black in the face,
+and panting with exertion, released himself from the inventor's clutch,
+and, in turn, caught him by the throat. With his long arm he held the
+furious old man at a safe distance. The unhappy girl was now agonized
+with fears for her father's life.
+
+"This is madness. Let us stop it." Thus Pet heard Marcus Wilkeson say,
+in panting accents.
+
+What demoniac spell was it that prevented her from shrieking--"Stop it.
+In God's name, father, stop?"
+
+"Never!" said the undaunted old man. "Never, till I have thrown you
+headlong down stairs! Liar! Villain!"
+
+With that, Pet saw her father hurl himself, with the ferocity of a
+tiger, on Marcus Wilkeson. Such was the suddenness and impetuosity of
+the movement, that Marcus was pushed back several feet toward the door,
+from the centre of the room, where the most obstinate part of the
+struggle had taken place.
+
+But the old man's supremacy was short lived. The younger and stronger
+man suddenly stooped, caught the inventor with both hands under the
+arms, and thrust him toward the corner occupied by the mysterious
+machine. The inventor would have fallen on it, and perhaps have been
+instantly killed by contact with some portion of the brass or iron work,
+but for the interposition of the screen. This broke his fall. He
+scrambled to his feet, full of rage, and foaming at the mouth.
+
+Marcus stepped back, and said, "Now let it cease."
+
+Pet saw her father snatch something that looked like a club, from some
+part of the machine.
+
+"This is my answer," he said, and precipitated himself with fresh fury
+upon Marcus.
+
+The younger man had expected the attack, and braced himself for it. He
+caught the inventor by the arm that held the club, or other weapon. They
+wrestled for its possession--the inventor with frenzy in every feature,
+Marcus with fixed determination, and silently.
+
+The weapon was now aloft--now below--now shifted in the twinkling of an
+eye to the right, and now to the left. At one time the inventor seemed
+to be on the point of securing it; at another, Marcus. Suddenly Pet saw
+it whirl like a shillelah above her father's head, with a strange noise
+like the quick winding of a clock. Then she heard a dull sound, as of
+striking a board with a brick, and--she saw her father fall to the
+floor. At the same moment, the light in the room went out, and all
+was darkness.
+
+The pent-up agony at last found utterance. She shrieked, and, instantly,
+her eyes were open, and her limbs free. She jumped out of bed, and was
+about to rush into the chamber of horrors, when she saw the bright light
+of the gas yet shining through the crack beneath her door. She listened.
+The house was still as the grave. Not a sound from all the world
+outside, except the striking of a fire alarm for the seventh district.
+The deep notes vibrated upon her quickened hearing like a knell.
+
+Then she remembered that, in the vision, the light had disappeared. Here
+it was gleaming under her door as brightly as ever. "Pshaw! what a silly
+girl I am!" said she. "It was a nightmare. That's all." She raised her
+hands to her face. It was hot and dripping.
+
+"Father prescribed too large a dose of blankets. No wonder I had this
+horrid dream."
+
+But, notwithstanding the presence of the light, and the absence of all
+noise, such as would be caused by the murderer in leaving the room and
+going down stairs, the impression of this tragic vision upon her mind
+was not to be dismissed with a "Pshaw!"
+
+Pet would have derived much relief from opening the door and looking in,
+and seeing, with her own waking eyes, that her father was alive, at his
+usual seat in the corner. She placed her hand upon the latch.
+
+But then she remembered how her father had laughed at her, two or three
+times before, when she was a younger girl, and not so wise as now, and
+had rushed into his room screaming with fright from a nightmare. She
+prided herself on having outgrown childish fears.
+
+She also remembered that her father had told her, two days before, that
+he was engaged in the most difficult mathematical calculations, day and
+night, and, kissing her, had playfully said that she must not
+disturb him.
+
+"He is thinking over his problems now," thought little Pet. "Dear
+father! I _do_ wish he would give up that hateful machine. It will be
+the death of him. But he said I must not disturb him, and I will not.
+Mr. Wilkeson must have gone home a long time ago; and dear father is
+thinking, as he calls it, with his hand on his forehead, in the old
+corner. Let me take one little peep through the keyhole, and go to
+bed again."
+
+Pet stooped, and looked through the keyhole. Within her range were the
+chair where Marcus Wilkeson had sat that evening, and the nail
+where--with bachelor-like precision--he always hung his hat. Neither
+Marcus Wilkeson nor his hat were in their accustomed, places. "What
+silly things these dreams are!" thought little Pet. The keyhole did not
+command the corner of the room where the machine stood, and where the
+inventor pondered and toiled; but Pet felt as certain that he was there,
+coaxing thoughts out of his pale brow with that habitual caress of the
+hand, as if she had seen him.
+
+"Good night, dear father," she whispered, softly. "May Heaven watch over
+your labors, and keep you from all harm."
+
+With this pious prayer, she slid into her warm nest. But, before
+adjusting her limbs for sleep, she threw off a portion of the heavy
+blankets which had weighed upon her, and was soon sound asleep, and
+dreaming of a garden in which all the roses were beautiful new bonnets.
+
+Still the moon played her ghastly metamorphoses in the little chamber.
+And the figures on the carpet and the figures on the curtain writhed in
+horrible contortions of glee, as if they rejoiced over a calamity which
+had befallen that house.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+WHAT THE MORNING BROUGHT.
+
+The child woke about seven o'clock. She knew the time by the sun's rays
+upon the window curtains. In that strong, cheerful light, the phantom
+faces had shrunk back to great red bunches of flowers again. She thought
+of the absurd dream, or vision, as of something that had happened ages
+ago, and wondered that she had been foolish enough to be frightened
+by it.
+
+There was no noise in her father's room. But that was not strange, for
+he rarely retired to bed before three o'clock in the morning (even when
+he did not sit up all night), and slept till eight. His sleep, though
+short, was sound; and it was Pet's custom to prepare breakfast in her
+father's room without waking him.
+
+She washed her face, which looked rosy and bewitching in the little
+cracked mirror, and dressed her hair in two simple bands down the
+cheeks, and put on a white calico dress with small red spots, and a
+white apron bound with blue. This was the dress that her father loved
+the best. She looked in the glass, and examined her damaged reflection
+with a charming coquetry, and said, "Pet, child, you are looking well
+to-day. Now for breakfast."
+
+Pet walked to the door, humming her last music lesson in a low voice.
+
+She placed her hand upon the latch, and opened the door softly. As it
+swung on its hinges, and she began to obtain a glimpse of the room, she
+noticed the gas still burning, though the daylight filled the apartment.
+This was strange. A shudder passed through her frame, and her cheeks
+began to pale.
+
+"Pooh! what nonsense!" she said. She pushed the door wide open.
+
+Was it another mocking, maddening vision that she saw? She rubbed her
+eyes in wild affright, and then raised her hands aloft with a
+piercing shriek.
+
+There, before her, lay the dead body of her father. In the centre of his
+ghastly forehead was a small wound, from which the blood had trickled
+over the temples, bedabbling his thin gray hairs, and forming a small
+red pool by his side. Near him, on the floor, was a club with an iron
+tip, which had done the dreadful deed. She recognized it at once as a
+part of the machine.
+
+The monstrous vision of the night was true! Her father was dead! Mr.
+Wilkeson was his murderer! She was an orphan!
+
+These agonizing thoughts flashed through her brain in the single
+instant. She felt her head turning, and her limbs failing under her. She
+had only strength to shriek, "Murder! murder! Help! help!" and then she
+fell headlong and senseless upon her father's dead body.
+
+
+
+BOOK SEVENTH.
+
+JOURNEYINGS AGAINST FATE.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+PEA-SHOOTING AS A SCIENCE.
+
+Be it said to the credit of Wesley Tiffles, that he always paid bills
+promptly when he could borrow money to do it. The funds that he had
+raised from Marcus Wilkeson, and others, for the panorama, had been
+faithfully applied to that great object. If he could have borrowed money
+from other people to repay those loans, that act of financial justice
+would also have been done; and so on without end, like a round robin.
+
+When Tiffles bestowed the last instalment of compensation upon Patching,
+that individual shrugged his shoulders, and smiled. "The paltry price of
+artistic degradation," said he. "Remember, I would have done this job
+only for a friend. The world must not know it is a Patching--though I
+fear that even on this hasty daub I have left marks of my style which
+will betray me."
+
+"You are safe, my dear fellow," said Tiffles. "I have already ordered
+the posters and bills; and the name of Andrea Ceccarini will appear
+thereon as the artist. Ceccarini has an Italian look, which is an
+advantage; and, you will pardon me for saying, is rather more imposing
+than Patching."
+
+The artist was sensitive touching his name. It had been punned upon in
+some of the comic papers. He could not take offence at the innocent
+remark of a friend, but he felt hurt, and vindictively rammed the large
+roll of one-dollar bills into his vest pocket without counting them.
+(Whenever it was practicable, Tiffles paid his debts in bills of that
+denomination. He had a theory that the amount looked larger, and was
+more satisfactory to the receiver.)
+
+As Tiffles saw how lightly the artist regarded the money, not even
+counting it, he felt a momentary pang at the thought that he had
+paid him.
+
+The panorama of Africa had not only been finished and paid for, but it
+had been exhibited to a large number of clergymen of all denominations,
+at the lecture room of an up-town church. The clergymen, being debarred
+from attending secular amusements, as a class, had gladly accepted the
+invitation of "Professor Wesley" (Tiffles's panoramic name), and brought
+with them their wives and a number of children apiece.
+
+The panorama was rigged up at the end of the lecture room, in front of
+the desk, under the personal supervision of a former assistant of
+Banvard's, and worked beautifully, saving an occasional squeak in
+the rollers.
+
+Tiffles, in his character of Professor Wesley, told his story glibly and
+with perfect coolness, interspersing the heavier details with amusing
+anecdotes, which made the ministers smile, and brought out a loud titter
+of laughter from the ministers' wives, and tremendous applause,
+inclusive of stamping and the banging of hymn books, from the
+ministers' children.
+
+One of the children, with the love of mischief peculiar to that division
+of the human family, had provided himself with peas, and, taking
+advantage of the partial darkness in which the panorama was exhibited,
+shot those missiles with practised aim at Professor Wesley, and now and
+then hit him in the face. The lecturer kept in good humor; and when,
+after a smart volley of peas, Rev. Dr. A---- arose, and suggested that
+these disturbances were disgraceful, and, although he did not wish to
+meddle with the household government of his brethren, he thought that
+the children who were guilty of such outrages ought to be taken home,
+soundly whipped, and put to bed--when Rev. Dr. A----, moved by just
+indignation, did this, the lecturer smiled, and blandly said: Oh, no; he
+wasn't annoyed in the least (at the same time receiving a pea on his
+left cheek). He would trust to the generosity of his young friends not
+to fire their peas too hard; and he hoped that the reverend gentleman
+would withdraw his suggestion.
+
+Cries of "All right, brother!" "We'll keep the boys quiet!" "Go on! go
+on!" went up from all parts of the room. Rev. Dr. A----, yielding to the
+pressure, sat down, and received, at that moment, one pea on the right
+eye of his gold spectacles, and another square on the end of his nose.
+The two peas were fired by his second son John, who had been delivering
+this invisible artillery all the evening from the other end of the
+identical pew in which the Rev. Dr. was seated. He groaned in the
+spirit, and muttered something to Mrs. Rev. Dr. A---- about the
+degeneracy of other people's children, which made that lady chuckle low,
+under cover of the night; for she knew that her second son John was the
+pea-shooter, and had made vain efforts to stop him, by pinching his leg,
+though the good matron could not help laughing at every fine shot
+achieved by her promising boy.
+
+Professor Wesley "went on," as requested, and so did the pea-shooting,
+until John's stock of ammunition gave out.
+
+The lecturer had ransacked the Society, Astor, and Mercantile libraries,
+and stuffed himself with facts touching the interior of Africa, so far
+as that mystery had been explored. Fortified with these facts, and a
+lively imagination, he found no difficulty in satisfying the curiosity
+of his auditors on every point; and answered questions of all sorts,
+which were fired at him even thicker than the peas, without the least
+hesitation.
+
+When the exhibition was over, every clergyman present signed a
+certificate declaring that they had been highly entertained and
+instructed by the Panorama of Africa, and Mr. Wesley's able lecture;
+that they considered the painting a masterpiece of moral Art, and
+cordially recommended it to the patronage of an enlightened public.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+BY STEAM.
+
+Tiffles had selected, as his first field of active operations, the State
+of New Jersey. His large number of relatives (the Tiffleses were
+prolific on the female side) and friends, and occasional creditors,
+scattered through New England and New York, effectually barred him from
+all that territory. New Jersey, then Pennsylvania, then the West--those
+were the great topographical features of his campaign.
+
+For his initiatory performance, he had chosen a quiet little town less
+than thirty miles from the city, on a line of railway. If his panorama
+was to be a hopeless failure at the very outset, Tiffles wanted to be
+within striking distance of New York. He was sanguine of success; but,
+like a prudent general, he looked after his lines of retreat.
+
+To this small town in New Jersey, with which the fate of the great
+enterprise was to be indissolubly linked, Tiffles had sent a large stock
+of posters and handbills. He had previously corresponded (free of
+expense both ways) with that universal business man of every American
+village, the postmaster, and, through him, had engaged Washington
+Hall--the largest hall in the place, capable of holding six hundred
+people--at five dollars for one night, with the refusal of two
+nights more.
+
+The name of the hall and the night of exhibition were written in blank
+spaces on the posters and handbills with red chalk, in a fine commercial
+hand, by Tiffles himself; and, for a small consideration, the postmaster
+had agreed to stick up the posters on every corner; also on the post
+office and the three town pumps; and to distribute the handbills in
+every house. These labors the P.M. did not undertake to perform
+personally--though he had plenty of leisure for them, as well as for the
+local defence of the National Administration, which was his peculiar and
+official function--but he turned them over to a semi-idiot, who
+occasionally did jobs of that kind, and who was willing to trust for his
+pay to the coming of Professor Wesley.
+
+The last letter from the postmaster ran thus:
+
+     Yure's of the 6th reseved, and contense, including for my
+     pussenel expenses, dooly noted, Washinton Hall has been moped
+     out for you and is clene as a pin, six new tin cannel sticks
+     have been put up in the antyrum by the propryetor, this is
+     lyberul, all the hanbils has been distributid, and the
+     posters stuck up, sum of em wrong side down, owin to the
+     bilposter bein a little week-minded, which will be a kind of
+     curosity, and an advantije to you I think. I have sent
+     tickets to the village pastures and their famylis, as yu
+     requested and they red the notises last Sunday and advised
+     everybuddy to go. I have gut public opinion all rite for yu
+     here, now cum on with yer panyrammer of Afriky.
+
+     Yure's trooly,
+
+     B. PERSIMMON, p.m.
+
+This was cheering; and Tiffles only hoped that he would be able to
+secure so faithful an ally in every postmaster, for he had decided to do
+this preliminary work through that variety of public functionary, until
+the success of the panorama would justify hiring a special courier to go
+in advance and smooth the way for him,
+
+All these preparations having been satisfactorily made; and the
+panorama, with the curtains, the lighting apparatus, and the other
+properties, having been forwarded in three enormous boxes to the scene
+of the impending conflict with public opinion, Tiffles made ready to
+follow. And, on the eventful morning of the----- of April, 185-, he
+might have been seen at the Cortlandt-street ferry, accompanied by
+Patching, who had graciously consented to see how the "thing worked" on
+its first public trial.
+
+Patching pulled his enormous hat still farther over his eyes, so that he
+might not be recognized. This gave him an extremely questionable aspect;
+and the ticket taker at the ferry peered under the huge brim
+suspiciously as Patching came in. He also attracted the attention of a
+detective in citizen's clothes, and was a general object of interest to
+all the people congregated in the ferry house and waiting for the boat.
+
+"This is fame," muttered Patching, glancing at his scrutinizers from the
+shadow of the far-reaching hat. "This is what people starve and die for.
+It is a bore." He struck an attitude, as if unconsciously, folding his
+arms, and appearing to be in a profound revery. Then, after another
+cautious glance about, he turned to Tiffles, by his side, and said:
+
+"It is useless. I am recognized. But remember your solemn promise. I had
+no hand in the painting of it."
+
+"Not a little finger, my dear fellow," cheerfully replied Tiffles, who
+had given the artist similar assurances of secrecy five times
+that morning.
+
+At that moment a hand touched Tiffles familiarly on the shoulder. He
+turned suddenly, for he was always expecting rear attacks from
+creditors. He saw Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"Best of friends," said Tiffles, with unfeigned joy, "I am glad to see
+you. Of course you are going with us, though I hardly dared hope as much
+when I sent you the invitation."
+
+"To tell the truth, Tiffles, I had no intention of going, till this
+morning, when it suddenly occurred to me that a little trip in the
+country, and the fun of seeing your panorama and hearing you lecture,
+would drive away the blues. I had a bad fit of them last night."
+
+Here Patching turned, and looked Marcus in the face, without seeming to
+recognize him. It was his habit (not a singular one among the human
+species) to pretend not to remember people, and to wait for the first
+word. Marcus indulged in the same habit to some extent, and, when he saw
+Patching looking at him without a nod or a word, he also was blank and
+speechless.
+
+"Don't you remember each other?" said Tiffles. "Mr. Patching. Mr. Marcus
+Wilkeson."
+
+The gentlemen shook hands, and said:
+
+"Oh, yes! How do you do? It is a fine morning. Very."
+
+"So much paler than when I last saw you, that I didn't know you,
+positively. Little ill, sir?" asked Patching. The artist was sure to
+observe and speak of any signs of illness on the faces of his friends
+and acquaintances. Some people called him malevolent for it.
+
+To be told that one looks pale, always makes one turn paler. Marcus,
+extra sensitive on the point of looks, became quite pallid, and said,
+with confusion:
+
+"I have not been well for several days, and my rest was badly broken
+last night."
+
+Tiffles had also remarked the unusual deadly whiteness of his friend's
+complexion, and the air of lassitude and unhappiness which pervaded his
+face, but he would not have alluded to them for the world. He never made
+impertinent observations of that sort.
+
+"Unwell?" said Tiffles. "I had not noticed it. In the morning, all New
+York looks as if it had just come out of a debauch. Wilkeson will pass,
+I guess." This calumny upon the city was Tiffles's favorite bit of
+satire, and it had cheered up many a poor fellow who thought himself
+looking uncommonly haggard.
+
+Marcus smiled languidly, and turned away his head with a sigh. As his
+eyes swept about, they encountered the gaze of the man in citizen's
+clothes, previously noticed. At first, Marcus thought he had seen this
+man somewhere before; and then he thought he was mistaken. The man
+evinced no recognition of Marcus, and, an instant after, his sharp
+glance wandered to some other person in the large group waiting for
+the boat.
+
+Here the boat came into the slip, and, after bumping in an uncertain way
+against the piles on either side, neared almost within leaping distance
+of the wharf. A solid crowd of passengers stood at the edge of the boat,
+with their eyes fixed on the landing place, as if it were the soil of a
+new world upon which they were to leap for the first time, like a party
+of Columbuses When the distance had been diminished to about four feet,
+the front row of passengers jumped ashore, and rushed wildly up the
+street, as if impelled by a rocket-like power from behind. These people
+could not have been more eager to get ashore, if they had come from the
+other side of the globe on business involving a million apiece, to be
+transacted on that day only.
+
+In fact, they were only lawyers, tradesmen, mechanics, and clerks,
+living in Jersey City, and going over to New York on their daily,
+humdrum business. It was not the business that attracted them, but the
+demon of American restlessness that pushed them on. They went back at
+night in just the same hurry, and made equally hazardous jumps on the
+Jersey side. They were mere shuttlecocks between the battledoors of
+Jersey City and New York.
+
+Tiffles and Patching lifted up the thin carpet bags which reposed at
+their feet, and which contained an exceedingly small amount of personal
+linen and other attire, and went on board the boat, followed by Marcus,
+who was unencumbered with baggage. They entered the ladies' cabin. The
+thick crowd of people pressed into the cabin in their front and rear,
+and all about them, and scrambled for seats. There was a general
+preference for the part forward of the wheelhouse, because it was a few
+feet nearer New Jersey than the aft part. The rush to obtain these
+preferred places was like that of the opera-going world for the front
+row of boxes at a _matinée_. Ladies who obtained eligible seats, settled
+themselves in them, spread out their dresses, put their gloved hands in
+position, and smiled with a sweet satisfaction at ladies who had got no
+seats. Those ladies, in turn, looked reproachfully at the gentlemen who
+were comfortably seated. And those gentlemen, with the exception of a
+few who rose and gracefully offered their seats to the youngest and
+prettiest of the ladies, in turn looked out of the windows, or at the
+floor, or at a paper, intently.
+
+A stranger to the ferry boats and customs of the country would have
+supposed that the passengers were bound for Europe instead of the
+opposite shore of North River.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson, Times, and Patching did not participate in this contest
+for seats, but walked through the fetid and stifling cabins to the
+forward deck, where fresh, bracing air, glorious sunlight, and a cheery
+view of the river were to be had. But these charms of nature were
+apparently thrown away on the trio. They all leaned over the railing,
+and, looked steadily into the water. Times was thinking up his lecture,
+and other matters of the panorama. Patching was misanthropically
+reviewing his career, and exulting in future triumphs over his
+professional enemies. Marcus was engrossed with some sad theme which,
+once or twice, brought tears into his eyes. A burst of noble music, a
+fine sentiment in a poem, a poor woman crying, keen personal
+disappointment, or any acute mental trouble, had this strange effect on
+the optics of Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+The bell rang; voices shouted, "All aboard!" the gangplank was drawn in;
+several belated people jumped on, at the risk of their lives, after the
+boat had left the wharf, one man vaulting over ten feet; and the voyage
+for Jersey was commenced.
+
+Three minutes later, the inmates of the cabins began to go forward and
+pick favorable positions for jumping off on the other side. The scramble
+to evacuate the seats then was as sharp as the scramble to possess them,
+three minutes before. A few more rounds of the wheels, and the boat
+thumped in the usual way against one row of piles at the entrance of the
+Jersey slip, and then caromed like a billiard ball on the other, each
+time nearly knocking the passengers off their feet, and shaking a small
+chorus of screams out of the ladies.
+
+When the boat was within a yard of the wharf, the jumping commenced; and
+all the able-bodied men, most of the boys, and some of the ladies, were
+off before the boat butted with tremendous force against the wharf,
+shaking both wharf and boat to their foundations, and giving to the
+people on both a parting jar, which they carried in their bones for the
+rest of the day.
+
+Once safely on the wharf, the scramble was continued in various
+directions and for various objects. Marcus, Tiffles, and Patching
+indulged in the eccentricity of not scrambling; and, when they reached
+the Erie Railroad cars, they found every seat taken, some by two
+persons, but many by one lady and a bandbox or carpet bag, which was
+intended to signify to the inquiring eye that the lawful human occupant
+of that half of the seat was absent, but might be expected to come in
+and claim it at any moment.
+
+The three companions understood this conventional imposture, and
+politely claimed the spare half seats from the nearest ladies. The fair
+occupants looked forbidding, and slowly removed their bandboxes,
+baskets, and other parcels, to the floor beneath, or the rack overhead;
+and the disturbers of their peace and comfort ruthlessly took the
+vacated seats, with a bow, signifying "Thank you."
+
+The seats thus procured were some distance apart; and so the three
+companions were precluded from conversing with each other. This suited
+the taciturn mood of each that morning. As for the ladies who filled the
+other half of the three seats, they might as well have been lay figures
+from a Broadway drygoods store; conversation with them being prohibited
+by the etiquette of railway travelling. A man may journey two hundred
+and fifty miles in a car, with his elbow unavoidably jogging a lady's
+all the way, and still be as far from her acquaintance (unless she is
+graciously inclined to say something first) as if the pair were leagues
+apart. This is proper, but peculiar.
+
+The strange sadness that possessed Marcus that morning was intensified
+as the ears rolled on. There is something in the monotonous vibration of
+the train, and the recurring click of the wheels against the end of the
+rails, that provokes melancholy. Marcus looked out of the window at the
+flying landscape, and the distant patches of wood which seemed to be
+slowly revolving about each other, and was profoundly wretched. He was
+totally unconscious of the sharp, pale, nervous face by his side.
+
+The owner of the face was about thirty-five years old, though the lines
+on her brow and cheeks added an apparent five years to her age. If she
+had been put upon her trial for murder, the police reporters would have
+discovered traces of great beauty in her countenance. An ordinary
+spectator, having no occasion to spice a paragraph, would have made the
+equivocal remark that she had once been handsomer.
+
+This lady was dressed plainly, comfortably, and in good taste. Her
+hands, ungloved, were shapely, but red and hard with manual labor. On
+the second finger of the left hand was a little gold ring, much thinned
+by wearing. The eyes of this lady were regarding the unconscious Marcus
+obliquely, with a singular expression of mingled recollection and doubt.
+Sometimes her glance would drop to the ring, as if that were a link in
+the chain of her perplexed reflections. A sudden jolt of the car, as the
+train ran over a pole which had fallen on the track, roused Marcus to
+the existence of this face and those eyes.
+
+As he saw the eyes sternly bent on him, he thought that his staring out
+of the window, past the lady's profile, might have offended her. So,
+with a cough which was meant to serve as an apology for the
+unintentional rudeness, he turned his face away, and continued his
+gloomy revery among the odd patterns of the oilcloth on the floor of
+the aisle.
+
+Still the thin, nervous lady watched him obliquely.
+
+A ride of three quarters of an hour brought them to their destination,
+as they learned from a preliminary howl of the conductor through the
+rear door of the car. The engine bell rang, the whistle screamed, the
+clack of the wheels gradually became slower.
+
+"Only one minute. Hurry!" howled the conductor again.
+
+Marcus, Tiffles, and Patching were out of their seats and at the door
+with American despatch. Before the car had quite stopped, they had
+jumped off. Marcus did not notice that, behind him, was a woman
+struggling between the two rows of seats with a bandbox, a workbasket,
+an umbrella, and her hoops, all of which caught in turn on one side or
+the other. Nor did the conductor observe that this burdened and
+distressed lady was trying to make her way out; for, after looking from
+the rear of the train, and seeing that three persons had landed, and
+that there was nobody to get on, he concluded that it would be a waste
+of time to stop a minute, and so rang the bell to go ahead. The engine
+driver, equally impatient, jerked the starting lever, and the engine
+bounded forward like a horse, giving a shock to the train, and nearly
+upsetting the woman, who was still wrestling with her personal effects
+between the rows of seats. With a sudden effort, she freed herself,
+opened the door, and stood upon the platform.
+
+The engine had wheezed three times, and she hesitated to jump. She
+screamed shrilly. The sound entered the ears of Marcus Wilkeson, who was
+whisking dust and ashes off his clothes with a handkerchief. He ran
+forward, and saw the predicament of his pale and nervous fellow
+traveller. She screamed again, as the engine wheezed for the
+eighth time.
+
+Marcus extended his hand. "Jump!" said he; "I'll catch you."
+
+She did jump, much to the surprise of Marcus and the two lookers
+on--thereby indicating decision of character.
+
+Marcus caught her in his arms--bandbox, basket, and all--and the train
+hurried on.
+
+"Thank you, sir," said the lady, with some confusion. Then she walked
+rapidly down the road toward the village, like one who lived there.
+
+"A customer for the panorama, perhaps," said Tiffles. "I'm glad you
+landed her safely." Tiffles had got through his thinking, and was
+exhilarate again. He laughed so pleasantly, that even Marcus relaxed his
+grim visage, and smiled.
+
+"Not a bad ankle, that," observed Patching, looking at the rapidly
+retreating form of the rescued woman. Patching, artist-like, was always
+discovering beauties where nobody else looked for them.
+
+Marcus had no eye for the charms of nature that morning, and he
+responded not to the remark which the artist had addressed to him.
+Whereupon Patching determined not to speak to Marcus again that day.
+
+They followed the mysterious female down the road which led to the
+village. On the fences, every few rods, were plastered posters
+announcing the "Panorama of Africa" for that evening, at "Washington
+Hall"--"Tickets, twenty-five cents"--"Children under twelve years of
+age, half price," &c., &c. As B. Persimmon, P.M., had said, in one of
+his letters, some of the posters were stuck upside down. This
+circumstance did not seem to prevent the population from reading them;
+for the party observed at least two boys (half prices) in the act of
+spelling them out between their legs.
+
+Tiffles was so absorbed in the contemplation of the posters, Patching in
+a critical survey of the scenery on both sides of the road, and Marcus
+Wilkeson in an introspection of his troubled heart, that none of them
+observed how often the thin, nervous female, walking rapidly ahead,
+looked over her shoulder at one of their number.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+PIGWORTH, J.P.
+
+The village was composed of the usual ingredients, in the usual
+proportions. Law, drygoods, liquor, blacksmithing, carpentry, education,
+painting and glazing, medicine, dentistry, tinware, and other comforts
+of civilization, were all to be had on reasonable terms. There were four
+churches with rival steeples, and two taverns with rival signs. The
+village contained everything that any reasonable man could ask for,
+except a barber's shop. It takes a good-sized town to support a
+barber's shop.
+
+As they marched into the village, they were conscious of attracting
+general attention. Men looked out of the doors, women out of the
+windows, and boys had begun to fall in procession behind.
+
+"Them are the performers," said one boy to another "Wonder what that
+feller with the big hat does?" observed a second. "Turns the crank,
+guess," was the response.
+
+Patching pulled his hat farther over his eyes, and smiled gloomily at
+Tiffles, "They little think who I am," he murmured.
+
+"What a solemncholy mug that tall chap's got," said another youthful
+citizen. This made Marcus try to laugh genially at the boys. But
+in vain.
+
+"Say, Bill, isn't that little feller's shirt out o' jail?"
+
+Tiffles made a personal application of this remark. It was his constant
+misfortune to suffer rents in portions of his garments where their
+existence was least likely to be discovered by himself. As he could not
+publicly verify the suggestion of the impertinent small boy, he buttoned
+his coat tightly about him.
+
+How their identity with the panorama of Africa had been established, was
+a mystery. Small boys divine secrets by instinct, as birds find food
+and water.
+
+The two taverns were the National House and the United States Hotel.
+Although the signs were large and clean, the taverns were small and
+dirty. There was no choice between them, except in the fact that the
+United States Hotel was directly opposite Washington Hall. Therefore the
+adherents of the panorama cast their fortunes with that place of
+entertainment for man and beast--particularly beast.
+
+Mr. Thomas Pigworth, the landlord, was seated on the stoop of his
+hostelry, discoursing of national politics to a small group of his
+fellow citizens, who were performing acrobatic feats with chairs in a
+circle about him. Pigworth was a justice of the peace, and was always
+dressed in his best clothes, so as to perform his judicial functions at
+a moments notice, with dignity and ease. He was tall, thin, baldheaded.
+T.J. Childon, landlord of the "National," said hard things, as in duty
+bound, of his rival. Among others, that he had kept himself lean by
+running so hard for office for the last ten years. To which slander
+Pigworth retorted, that Childon was fat (which was true--a fine, plump
+figure was Childon's) only because he ate everything in his house, and
+left nothing for his customers.
+
+The three newcomers mounted the rotten wooden steps to the stoop. Mr.
+Pigworth left his group of auditors, came forward, and received them
+with the affability of a retired statesman.
+
+"The landlord?" asked Tiffles.
+
+"I keep the hotel," said Pigworth, with a smile which intimated that he
+kept it for amusement rather than profit.
+
+"Room and board for three of us?" asked Tiffles.
+
+"Certainly," said Pigworth, with the air of a man who was doing them a
+favor. "Ef you want only one apartment, I can give you the one occupied
+last week by the Hon. Mr. Podhammer. You have heard of him?"
+
+"Of course," responded Tiffles, to cut short the conversation.
+
+"He spoke in Washington Hall, there, on the Cons'tution. He is smart on
+some things, but THE CONS'TUTION he doesn't understand--not a word of
+it. I told him so."
+
+Tiffles was about to ask why, if the Hon. Mr. Podhammer didn't
+understand a word of the Constitution, he had the audacity to lecture on
+it; when he remembered that it was no uncommon thing for lecturers to
+talk of what they don't understand--himself of Africa, for instance.
+
+"Be good enough to show us the room," said he.
+
+"I say, Judge" (Pigworth, being a justice of the peace, was universally
+styled thus), cried a voice from the group, "do you, or do you not,
+indorse my sentiments?"
+
+Pigworth turned majestically, and spoke like an oracle:
+
+"I do not indorse your sentiments. I wish it distinctly understood, that
+I do not indorse them. I indorse nothing but the Cons'tution. That
+instrument I indorse to any extent. Are you satisfied now?"
+
+This speech was hailed by cries of "Good! good!" "That's so!" "Sound
+doctrine, that!" "The Judge knows what's what!" Only one person, the
+questioner, a young man with a preternatural head, was unappeased.
+
+"A single word more," said this young man. "Do you, or do you not,
+subscribe to my views on the Homestead Law?"
+
+Pigworth looked at the three comers as if to say, "Mark how I crush him
+now." Then, pointing his long right arm at the rash youth, he replied,
+slowly, but with fearful distinctness: "I do not subscribe to your
+views. Sooner would I lose this right arm than subscribe to them. There
+is only one view that I subscribe to. That view to which I subscribe
+(the Judge spoke with increased dignity here, and rose on his
+toes)--that view is found in the Cons'tution. You would do well to study
+the Cons'tution, my young friend."
+
+This withering rebuke was greeted with shouts and clapping of hands from
+all but the young man, who muttered something about humbug, and
+looked glum.
+
+The landlord had another excoriating remark, which he might have flung
+at the young man and finished him up, but he magnanimously forbore.
+
+"Now, my friends," said the landlord, patronizingly. He ushered them
+into a dirty entry, and piloted the way up stairs.
+
+"From New York, I suppose?" said the landlord. "Any political news?"
+
+"Really, sir, we don't meddle with politics," replied Tiffles, sharply.
+
+The landlord looked at him with an expression of pity "Oh! to be sure
+not. You belong to the pannyrama. I recolleck that the last circus folks
+that come here never talked about politics. Are you Professor Wesley?"
+
+"I am," said Tiffles.
+
+"I merely wanted to say," continued the landlord, "that six of my
+lodgers are goin' to the pannyrama on my recommendation. I have a wife,
+sister-in-law and five children."
+
+Tiffles took the hint. "I will hand you a complimentary ticket for
+yourself and family," said he.
+
+"Oh, no! by no means!" replied the landlord. "I wouldn't think of taking
+it."
+
+Mr. Pigworth then ushered his guests into the large, uncomfortable
+apartment known as the "best room" in all country hotels. The ceiling
+was low; there were three windows with small panes, the sashes of which
+rattled in the wind; a rag carpet covered the floor; an old bureau,
+topped off with a dirty white cloth, a rickety table similarly draped,
+four cane-bottomed chairs, and a huge wooden spitbox filled with
+sawdust, stood at intervals around. Two single beds occupied
+opposite corners.
+
+With reference to the beds, Mr. Pigworth remarked:
+
+"Podhammer and Gineral Chetley slept in that air one. Colonel
+Hockensacker and Judge Waterfield in t'other. There was four other
+mattresses put down here that night, each of 'em with two of our most
+distinguished citizens on it. That convention was worth to me a good
+hundred dollars."
+
+With every respect for the precedent established by Podhammer and
+associates, Marcus Wilkeson preferred to sleep alone, as he had done for
+twenty years. He privately expressed to the landlord a desire for one of
+the mattresses which had done duty during the convention.
+
+The landlord smiled, evidently regarding the request as eccentric and
+unreasonable, but nodded "All right." As for Tiffles and Patching,
+having shared the same couch several nights during the incubation of the
+panorama, the problem of how to distribute three men among two beds
+gave them no concern. Pigworth then retired.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson's first act was to open the windows, and mix some fresh
+air with the damp and mouldy atmosphere of the apartment. Patching's
+first act was to light his pipe, and throw himself on the nearest bed
+for a smoke. Tiffles's first act was to inspect the rent which the
+impertinent small boy had discovered, and make temporary repairs with a
+pin. Having done these things, and arranged their toilets hastily in a
+mirror with a crack running through it like a streak of lightning, the
+three adventurers sallied forth, and crossed the street to
+Washington Hall.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+STOOP.
+
+Washington Hall was the only place of public congregation, excepting the
+churches, in the village. It was used on Sunday by a small but clamorous
+religious sect; on Monday by a lodge of Free Masons; on Tuesday by a
+lodge of Odd Fellows; on Wednesday by the Sons of Temperance; and for
+the balance of the week was open to any description of exhibition that
+came along. It was originally built for a loft, and its reconstruction
+into a public hall was an afterthought. It was situated over a drug
+store, and was owned by the druggist, Mr. Boolpin, who was universally
+regarded as the meanest man in the village.
+
+As the three drew near the door, Mr. Boolpin, strongly smelling of
+aloes, and carrying a pestle in his hand, came out to greet them. He, in
+common with all the inhabitants, knew that the "pannyrarmer folks" were
+in town. The small boys had borne the glad intelligence all abroad. A
+number of citizens, who had been lying in wait, issued forth with Mr.
+Boolpin, and looked hard at the three.
+
+"The proprietor of the hall," said Mr. Boolpin, introducing himself.
+
+"My name is Wesley," responded Tiffles. He then introduced Patching as
+Signor Ceccarini, and Wilkeson as Mr. Wilkes. Patching chuckled inwardly
+at the thought of the incognito, and imagined the sensation that would
+be produced by the accidental revelation of his real name. Marcus felt a
+momentary humiliation at having consented to this innocent imposture.
+
+Mr. Boolpin, having shaken hands solemnly with the three, asked them to
+walk up stairs and look at the hall. They accordingly followed him up a
+series of creaking steps.
+
+"Everything in apple-pie order," said Mr. Boolpin. "The three boxes
+containing the panorama right side up with care, you see. I had them
+carted from the depot. Cost me a dollar. People thought they were
+coffins. Ha! ha! Six new tin candlesticks, you observe; also the ceiling
+whitewashed; also ten extra seats introduced, making the entire capacity
+of the hall three hundred and fifty--giving twelve inches of sitting
+room to each person. No extra charge for these fixings, though I made
+them expressly on your account. There are some things about this hall to
+which I would call your attention. Boo! Boo! Hallo! Hallo! No echo, you
+perceive. Likewise notice the fine view from the window." Mr. Boolpin
+pointed to a swamp which could be distinctly seen over a housetop toward
+the east. "The ventilation is a great feature, too." Mr. Boolpin
+directed his pestle toward a trap door in a corner of the ceiling,
+through which a quantity of rain had come a night or two previous,
+leaving a large wet patch on the floor. "It's almost too cheap for
+fifteen dollars a night."
+
+"For what?" asked Tiffles.
+
+"For fifteen dollars," replied Mr. Boolpin, twirling his pestle
+playfully. "Of course, not reckoning in the one dollar that you owe me
+for cartage. It's too cheap. I ought to have made it twenty dollars."
+
+"Why, Mr. Persimmon, the postmaster here, engaged the hall for five
+dollars. Here is his letter mentioning the price." Tiffles produced the
+letter, and pointed out the numeral in question.
+
+"It's a 5, without any doubt," rejoined Mr. Boolpin; "but Persimmon had
+no authority to name that price. I distinctly told him fifteen dollars.
+But here he is. Perhaps he can explain it."
+
+The three turned on their heels, and beheld, standing at the door, a
+short, dirty man in a faded suit of black, and a cold-shining satin
+vest. He wore an old hat set well back on a bald head, and his cravat
+was tied on one side in hangman's fashion. One leg of his trowsers was
+tucked into the top of his boot; the other hung down in its proper
+position. The man's face and hands wanted washing. This was Mr.
+Persimmon, postmaster. The secrets of his popularity were: First, his
+addiction to dirt; second, his eccentricities of dress, heretofore
+enumerated; third, a reputation for political craft and long-headedness,
+not wholly unfounded, as his ingenuity in procuring the passage of
+resolutions supporting the policy of the Administration, in all the
+conventions of his party since he became postmaster, fully proved. This
+political sage walked about town with Post-Office documents and
+confidential communications from Washington sticking out of all his
+pockets, and under the edge of his hat. He had a slight stoop in the
+shoulders, which the local wits said had increased since he undertook to
+carry the Administration.
+
+"Professor Wesley?" remarked Persimmon, extending a grimy hand. "Happy
+to see you."
+
+"Your most obedient," said Tiffles, a little stiffly, for the fifteen
+dollars annoyed him. It was a small sum to borrow, but a large one
+to pay.
+
+"Have you such a thing as a morning newspaper about you?" asked the
+postmaster. "Our bundle missed the train. As you may naturally imagine,
+sir, I am anxious to see how the grand mass meeting went off last night
+in your city. Perhaps you wos there?"
+
+Tiffles had never attended such a thing in his life; although he was
+aware that two or three grand mass meetings were held every week about
+all the year round, and a dozen nightly in times of political
+excitement. "No," said he; "but will you be good enough to tell me how
+much you hired this room for?"
+
+Persimmon thought how culpably ignorant some people were of the great
+political movements of the day, but did not say so. Descending from
+politics to the subject in hand, he replied:
+
+"Oh! fifteen dollars, of course. You will find it stated in my last
+letter to you." At this moment (no one of the three observing the act),
+the long-headed postmaster tipped a slight wink to Mr. Boolpin, who
+returned that signal of mutual understanding.
+
+Tiffles handed the letter to the postmaster, pointing out the figure 5.
+
+"Can I believe my eyes?" said the postmaster. "True enough, it is a 5.
+Confound my absent-mindedness in not puttin' down a 1." It may here be
+said, that similar instances of mental aberration were discovered in Mr.
+Persimmon's accounts toward the close of his official term.
+
+Tiffles was staggered, as he reflected that it would take sixty full
+tickets to pay the single item of rent. He had less than half a dollar
+in his own pocket. Patching was, as usual, reduced to his last
+five-dollar bill. Marcus had incidentally observed, a few minutes
+before, that he had left his wallet at home, and had only a handful of
+small silver about him. Suppose the panorama should fail on the first
+night, and be detained for debt! Tiffles had not thought of that.
+
+Tiffles remonstrated, entreated, suggested compromises, but all to no
+purpose. Boolpin was iron. The best arrangement that Tiffles could make,
+was to postpone the final settlement of the terms until after the
+performance. To that, Boolpin had not the least objection.
+
+"One thing more," said Boolpin. "If there is a row, and any seats or
+windows are broken, you are to pay the damages."
+
+Tiffles laughed faintly. "Oh! of course," said he. "But you never have
+rows here, do you?" He put the question with disguised interest.
+
+"Sometimes," carelessly replied Mr. Boolpin. "There was a legerdemain
+man got his machinery knocked to pieces, and his head broken. The mob
+was quite reasonable about the furniture, and smashed only ten seats and
+sixteen panes of glass. I charged the Professor twenty dollars for
+damages, but took off two dollars on account of his illness. Poor
+fellow! he was laid up more than a month. Then there was a band of
+nigger minstrels, called the 'Metropoliganians.' They were regular
+humbugs; and so the mob took them, and tarred and feathered them in the
+back lot. Damage to furniture on that occasion was only sixteen dollars;
+and I got every cent of it, by holding on to their trunks. There have
+been a good many such little affairs in this village. I mention these
+two cases only as examples."
+
+"And yet no people in the world is more peaceable, nor more easily
+satisfied, than the people of this town," said the postmaster. "They
+only axes not to be imposed on. That's all."
+
+"A kinder-hearted people don't live on the face of this earth," added
+Boolpin, stating the case in another way; "but you mustn't give them
+less than twenty-five cents' worth for a quarter."
+
+Tiffles replied to the effect that he would give them a dollar's worth
+apiece; but, in his heart, he foresaw, with that remarkable prescience
+which is occasionally vouchsafed to mortals, that the panorama of Africa
+was doomed to be a bad failure; and he bitterly regretted that he had
+not tried some one of a dozen other immense speculations which he had
+thought of. But he determined to give one night's exhibition, whatever
+might be the consequences. "I may as well die for an old sheep as a
+lamb," thought Tiffles.
+
+During this conversation, Patching was secretly studying the effect of
+the swamp, visible from the eastern windows; and Marcus was looking at
+the cracked wall in a fit of abstraction.
+
+Tiffles had observed several times, that morning, a youth, or man, of
+singular aspect, following him. Occasionally, on turning around
+suddenly, he would see this person at his elbow. Looking behind, at the
+close of the colloquy with the landlord, he again saw the strange youth,
+or man. The being was nearly six feet high, and powerfully built, like a
+strong man of twenty-five. His face was childish even to the degree of
+silliness. The mouth opened like a flytrap; the eyes were small and
+intensely guileless. Only a few wrinkles, and a few hairs, which grew
+wide apart on his cheeks and chin, indicated his manhood. But the oddest
+feature was the falling away of his forehead, at an angle which a dirty
+greased cap, pulled over his brow, could not conceal.
+
+"Well, sir, what do you want?" said Tiffles.
+
+"If you please, sir," said the singular being, in a cracked voice, "yure
+the pannyrarmer, a'n't ye?"
+
+"Not exactly, my lad, but I own it. And who are you?"
+
+"My name's Stoop, if you please, sir."
+
+Mr. Boolpin broke out with a laugh, which made the building reverberate.
+"It's the village idiot," said he. "He goes by the name of Stoop, which
+is short for Stupid. Ha! ha! Come, now, clear out, Stupid, and don't be
+bothering the gentleman."
+
+The boy-man began to whimper, when Tiffles, recollecting an allusion to
+a semi-idiot in one of the postmaster's letters, said:
+
+"Stay, my lad; I believe I owe you something."
+
+"For pastin' up two hundred posters, fifty cents; and distributin' five
+hundred bills, twenty-five cents. Totale, seventy-five cents." The idiot
+did not hold out his hand for the pay, and Tiffles conceived an instant
+esteem for him. An idea came to Tiffles. This idiot, as he was called,
+had shown intelligence in reckoning. He might have a deal of good sense
+under that dull exterior. Tiffles had observed, in his travels, that
+_the_ idiot which Providence assigns to every town and village, is not
+always the biggest fool in it. This idiot might have sufficient
+intellect to turn the crank of the panorama, and render muscular aid in
+other respects. At any rate, he was able-bodied enough.
+
+"My lad," said Tiffles.
+
+"Stoop, if you please, sir."
+
+"Very good. Stoop, I think I can find some work for you behind the
+scenes to-night. Can you turn a crank?"
+
+"I've done it to grindstones, sir."
+
+"It's the same principle," said Tiffles, laughing. "I'll engage you."
+
+The idiot took off his greasy cap, and swung it in the air with joy. A
+smile irradiated his great, coarse face, and his small eyes twinkled.
+"Gosh golly!" he cried; "I'm goin' to be one of the performers. I'm
+so glad!"
+
+He said this, in a spirit of juvenile exultation, to the dozen boys who
+stood gaping in at the doorway. This innocent bit of boasting provoked
+their derisive laughter, and a quantity of playful epithets and
+nicknames, which the idiot endured with marvellous patience, until one
+dirty little boy put the thumb of his left hand to his nose, twirled the
+fingers, and said, "Boo! boo! boo!" This act had the same effect on poor
+Stoop as the shaking of a red handkerchief at a bull. It enraged him. He
+sprang at the youth, and, but for the sudden closing of the door by the
+offender, who had judiciously kept a hand on the knob, would have
+chastised him on the spot.
+
+The door not only arrested his progress, but suddenly checked his wrath.
+"I'm very sorry, indeed, Professor," said he; "but Gorrifus! it makes
+me so mad!"
+
+Messrs. Boolpin and Persimmon laughed heartily. "He's a perfect idiot,
+you see," remarked the former. "Coming the nose system at him always
+makes him mad."
+
+Tiffles did not understand how that was any proof of idiocy; but, to
+prevent the recurrence of any difficulty between his new assistant and
+the populace of small boys, he thought it best to take possession of the
+hall, and lock the door. He therefore signified to Mr. Boolpin that they
+would at once proceed to put up the panorama. Tiffles threw off his
+coat, thereby intimating that he would go to work at once.
+
+Messrs. Boolpin and Persimmon inquired, as a matter of form, whether
+their further assistance was needed, and were answered in the negative.
+Whereupon they retired--Mr. Boolpin uttering a farewell caution against
+driving more nails in the wall than were necessary, and not to cut the
+floor under any circumstances--and the panorama and its adherents were
+left alone.
+
+Mr. Boolpin had driven the uproarious boys before him with his pestle,
+administering smart taps to the reluctant ones. Tiffles suffered no
+further annoyance from them that day, save an occasional "Boo! boo!"
+shouted through the keyhole, and followed by an immediate scampering of
+the perpetrators down stairs. This well-known sound always roused the
+idiot to fury; and the peaceable persuasions, and even the gentle
+violence of Tiffles, were needed to keep him from relinquishing his work
+and springing to the door.
+
+He was a most intelligent and useful idiot. He could measure distances
+more accurately than either of the three, and could ply the saw, hammer,
+plane, or hatchet (Tiffles brought all these tools with him) like a
+carpenter. His strength and skill were so great, that Tiffles found
+himself gratefully relieved from the necessity of lifting, or directing.
+Marcus Wilkeson, who had also thrown off his coat with a manful
+determination to do a hard day's work, in the hope of tiring out and
+driving away the sadness that possessed him, put on the garment again,
+and sat on a front bench, vacantly staring like an idiot at the idiot,
+and all the while thinking, gloomily, of New York. Patching stalked
+about the hall, and criticized the work as it progressed, from numerous
+angles of observation; but even he confessed that he could make no
+improvement on Stoop's highly artistic disposition of things.
+
+The idiot worked on steadily and swiftly, and only two things
+interrupted him. The first was the "Boo!" yelled through the keyhole, as
+heretofore described. The second was the unrolling of portions of the
+panorama as they were taken out of the boxes, fastened together, and
+attached to the rollers.
+
+As the canvas was unwound, Stoop would drop his saw, or hammer, or other
+tool, and gaze, with his large mouth and small eyes wide open, at the
+pictorial marvels successively disclosed. "Blame it!" said he; "a'n't
+that splendid?" or, "By jingo! look at that!" or, "Thunder! don't that
+beat all?" The tigers' tails and the elephants' trunks, the alligators'
+snouts and the boa constrictor's convolutions, he recognized at once. He
+had "read all about 'em in Olney's Jogriffy."
+
+"He is an idiot of taste," thought Patching. "I wonder what they call
+him an idiot for?" thought Tiffles. "It's a pity all the people aren't
+idiots," said Marcus Wilkeson to Tiffles. "Your panorama would be
+patronized and appreciated then." It was Marcus's first approach to a
+joke that day.
+
+By four o'clock in the afternoon the Panorama of Africa was all up, the
+rollers and the curtain in good working order, and everything ready for
+the eventful night. Stoop had taken a lesson at the wheel, and turned it
+beautifully. Tiffles had arranged a system of signals with him. One
+cough was "Stop;" two coughs were "Go on;" one stamp was "Slower;" two,
+stamps were "Faster." Tiffles and Stoop rehearsed the system several
+times, the one being before the curtain, in the position of the
+lecturer, and the other behind it, at the crank. Nothing could be more
+satisfactory.
+
+"Only one thing puzzles me," said Tiffles to his friends. "Why do they
+call this smart fellow an idiot?"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+AN AUDIENCE ANALYZED.
+
+The eventful night came on. Tiffles and friends fortified themselves
+with a poor supper, including numerous cups of weak black tea, at the
+hotel, and repaired, full of anxiety and misgivings, to the hall. The
+idiotic but intelligent Stoop had remained in charge of the panorama,
+and feasted himself, intellectually, upon the splendors of that work of
+Art, as disclosed by a single candle in front.
+
+All the candles in the hall and the entry were then lighted up, and
+produced quite a gorgeous illumination of the four windows fronting on
+the main street. This having been done, Marcus (who, having a more
+extensive acquaintance with the faces of bank bills than either of his
+friends, had kindly consented to act as money taker and cashier) took
+his seat in a little box with a pigeon hole in it, and his entire stock
+of loose change, amounting to seventy-five cents in silver, spread
+before him. Tiffles stood within the door of the hall, to see that
+nobody came in (especially small boys) who had not paid. Stoop remained
+behind the scenes, and was positively instructed to stay there. Patching
+wandered up and down the hall, as if he were an early comer, and had
+paid his quarter, and had no personal knowledge of or interest in
+the panorama.
+
+Performance was to commence at 8 o'clock. Doors were open at 61/2. Some
+time previous to that hour, the stairs leading from the street door to
+the hall were lined with the lads of the village, who amused themselves
+with making jocular remarks about "the man in the cage there" (meaning
+Marcus), and "t'other man at the door, whose shirt was out of jail"
+(meaning Tiffles). Marcus smiled grimly at his assailants through the
+small pigeon hole; and Tiffles, who felt reckless in the sure view of a
+failure, laughed heartily at them, returned jokes as bad as they sent,
+but, in the height of his humor, begged them distinctly to understand
+that they could not get In without paying. At which the juvenile chorus
+sarcastically replied, "P'r'aps not;" "Mebbe you're right," "You'll have
+to stop up the keyhole, Mister;" "Mind I don't get down the
+chimbley," &c., &c.
+
+At precisely forty-seven minutes past six, the first man made his
+appearance. He was a thick-set, pompous individual, with a gold-headed
+cane and gold spectacles, and climbed up the stairs with dignity and
+difficulty. He was followed by a pale little woman, four small children,
+and a stout, red-haired nurse, bearing in her arms a baby, which was
+laboring under an attack of the intermittent squalls. Marcus
+reconnoitred the party through his pigeon hole, and nervously jingled
+the seventy-five cents in his hand. Tiffles stepped forward to the head
+of the stairs, in order that he might not be wanting in personal respect
+to his first patron.
+
+As this thick-set man ascended the stairs, the boys hushed their voices;
+but Tiffles distinctly heard several of them say, "It's the Square."
+Though apparently awestruck in his presence, the boys did not forget to
+play a few practical jokes on "the Square's" children, such as slapping
+them, and pinching their legs as they clambered wearily up. A peal of
+cries from his tortured offspring, particularly the baby, who received a
+pin in a sensitive part of its little person, so enraged "the Square,"
+that he would have beaten all the boys with his gold-headed cane, had
+they not jumped away, laughing, and got safely out of the building, only
+to be back again the next minute.
+
+"You should not allow these boys to hang around the stairs, sir," said
+the pompous man, planting his foot on the topmost step, and bringing
+down his cane on the floor with the ring of a watchman's club. "It's
+trouble enough to come to your panorama, without being annoyed by all
+the young vagabonds in the village."
+
+"I'm sorry, sir," replied Tiffles, inwardly laughing, "but it would take
+six strong men to regulate the little rascals."
+
+"Then you ought to employ six strong men, sir. It's your business to see
+that your patrons are not insulted."
+
+Tiffles could only smile deprecatingly.
+
+"Every exhibition in this hall, for a year past," continued the man,
+"has been a humbug--an outrage on the common sense of mankind. Perhaps
+yours is an exception, though, to be candid, I have my doubts of it. Do
+I understand, sir, that you have travelled in Africa?"
+
+Tiffles indulged in the unjustifiable deception of nodding his head.
+
+"And you mean to say that the sketches for this panorama were taken on
+the spot?"
+
+"Yes, sir; on the spot--in a horn."
+
+"In a horn! What's that?"
+
+"A technical phrase, sir, which it is hardly worth while to explain at
+length. Briefly, however, I may say, that no more ingenious or
+satisfactory mode of taking sketches has been invented."
+
+"Oh! never mind the details. I hate the jargon of Art. I only wished to
+assure myself that I am not to be imposed on. Well, I think I will risk
+it, and go in. You can put us on a front seat, I suppose?"
+
+"First come, first served," said Tiffles, amiably, for he had reckoned
+up, and found that this party brought him a dollar and a quarter,
+counting the children as half prices, and the baby free.
+
+"Under these circumstances we will go in, though I must confess I expect
+to be disappointed. You will excuse my plain speaking." The thick-set
+gentleman thereupon thrust a hand into a pocket, and produced--not a
+huge roll of bank bills, or a half pint of silver, as Marcus, who eyed
+him sharply through the pigeon hole, had expected, but--a card, which he
+poked at Tiffles.
+
+Tiffles recognized it at the first glance. It was one of thirty
+complimentary tickets that he had caused to be distributed among the
+leading men of the village that morning, by advice of the landlord; and
+it bore the name of "C. Skimmerhorn, Esq."
+
+"Welcome, sir, welcome!" said Tiffles, as he observed the dollar and a
+quarter disappear from his mental horizon, and felt that, but for his
+indomitable good nature, he would like to kick C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.,
+down stairs. And Tiffles, nobly concealing his disappointment, showed C.
+Skimmerhorn, Esq., and his domestic caravan to the best front seat. As
+he turned back to the door, he heard that gentleman say to his spouse,
+"That fellow looks like a humbug."
+
+A stream of people on the stairs gladdened his eyes. In one sweeping
+survey, he figured up three dollars. But they proved to be three
+clergymen, with faded wives, large families, and female relatives
+stopping with them. Each of the clergymen graciously informed Tiffles,
+on delivering up his family ticket, that a panorama was one of the few
+secular entertainments that he could consent to patronize. They doubted
+very much whether they could have been persuaded to come, but for the
+recommendation of their evangelical brethren in the city.
+
+Tiffles bowed acknowledgment of the empty honor, and ushered the three
+clergymen and families to the front row of seats, of which C.
+Skimmerhorn, Esq., and his train, occupied as much as they could cover
+by spreading out. Mr. Skimmerhorn recognized, in one of the clergymen,
+his beloved pastor, and proceeded, in a pleasant, off-hand manner, and a
+loud voice, to give a few of the reasons which inclined him to pronounce
+the panorama a humbug.
+
+"Being deadheads," sarcastically observed Tiffles to Marcus Wilkeson,
+"of course they come early, and take the best seats."
+
+The next customer was a poor but jovial mechanic, having a red-faced
+little wife slung on his arm. This humble individual paid down fifty
+cents in bright new silver to the grim treasurer, entered the hall, and
+took seats about halfway up. "It's a splendid affair, Sally, this 'ere
+pannyrammer, I'll bet anything." "Sha'n't we enjoy it, John!" returned
+that healthy young woman.
+
+More work for the amiable Tiffles, but none for the melancholy
+Wilkeson. Two more clergymen with families, the County Judge, the local
+railroad agent, all the members of the Board of Freeholders, and several
+other people, who, according to the landlord of the United States Hotel,
+were highly influential in moulding public opinion, and were in the
+habit of receiving free tickets.
+
+"Very good for a school of comparative anatomy," said Tiffles to Marcus
+(in facetious allusion to the deadheads), "but decidedly bad for my
+panorama."
+
+Marcus responded with a dreary smile through the pigeon hole.
+
+Then there came a few more mechanics and other plain people, and then a
+streak of fortune--an entire young ladies' seminary, headed by the
+preceptress, and divided into squads, each commanded by an assistant
+teacher acting as drill sergeant. They were admitted at half price (as
+per advertisement), and brought five dollars and sixty-two cents into
+the treasury. Tiffles rubbed his eyes at the sight of such a troop of
+blooming faces, and his hands at the thought of the grand accession to
+his cash box. The female seminary was accommodated with the two front
+rows of the best seats left.
+
+Following the seminary, in an unprecedented sequence of luck, was a
+boys' school, that came whooping up the stairway like a tribe of young
+Indians, in charge of a venerable sachem in spectacles. In the rush and
+excitement of the moment, several of them ran toll--a circumstance of
+which the old gentleman did not take cognizance when he settled with
+Marcus Wilkeson for their admission at twelve and a half cents _per
+capita_. Marcus had not noticed it, and Tiffles was far too generous to
+make a fuss about a few shillings.
+
+Then a party of six flashily dressed young men, who threw away their
+cigars as they came up stairs, and thrust their quarters through the
+pigeon hole at Marcus Wilkeson, as if they were good for nothing--which
+proved to be true of two of them. Being informed of the fact by Marcus,
+the owners of the counterfeits winked at each other, and whispered, "No
+go," and then offered a broken bill on a Connecticut bank. This also
+proved "no go," whereat the sharp practitioners winked again and
+laughed, and this time paid out good current coin. These were some of
+the fast men of the village. They took seats behind the female seminary.
+
+Luck changed again, and brought in the landlord, Mr. Persimmon, P.M.,
+Mr. Boolpin, and three more free tickets, with their wives and families.
+Mr. Boolpin whispered in Tiffles's ear, that he hoped there wouldn't be
+a row; but it was a hard-looking crowd that had just gone in ahead of
+him. And there were plenty more of them coming.
+
+The latter observation proved true. The next minute, the stairs swarmed
+with a jovial party, under the leadership of a gorgeous person, who wore
+in the middle of his snowy shirt front a cluster diamond pin larger than
+a ten-cent piece. This was one of the gentlemanly conductors on the
+railroad; and the mixed company which he had the honor to command, was
+composed of ticket sellers, freight masters, brakemen, civil engineers,
+and clerks of liberal dispositions and small salaries in various walks
+of life. The party was slightly drunk, but not offensive. The
+gentlemanly conductor paid for himself and associates out of a huge side
+pocket full of loose silver. They rolled up the hall, and took the
+nearest spare seats to the female seminary.
+
+Seven and three quarters P.M. arrived. The people in the hall began to
+stamp with a noise like thunder. Tiffles had marked the heavy boots of
+the conductor, and could recognize them in the din. Several deep hisses
+varied the monotony of the performance. There were no persons coming up
+stairs. The small boys, Tiffles observed with astonishment, had vacated
+the building some time before, and could now be heard whispering quietly
+around the door below.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+HUMOUS OF THE MANY-HEADED.
+
+Tiffles knew that his time had come, and he accepted the crisis.
+
+Requesting Marcus to pocket the funds, shut up the shop, and leave the
+door to take care of itself, Tiffles marched boldly to his doom.
+Previous to extinguishing the candles in the exhibition hall, he went
+behind the curtain, and there found the idiot sitting patiently at the
+crank, and rehearsing, in a low tone, the code of signals which had been
+adopted. Patching was also there. He shrugged his shoulders in the
+French style as Tiffles came in, but said not a word. Tiffles proceeded
+straight to a bottle which stood on a window sill, and took a long drink
+from it, and then passed it to Patching, who mutely did the same, and,
+in turn, handed it to the idiot, who pulled at it with great gusto, in
+the manner of a rational person.
+
+Feeling that it would be superfluous to repeat his instructions to so
+sagacious an idiot, Tiffles immediately presented himself before the
+audience again, with a long stick, or wand, for pointing out the
+beauties of the panorama.
+
+"Ladies and gentlemen, I am about to exhibit to you the Panorama of
+Africa. You have all heard of Africa."
+
+VOICE. "Consider'ble."
+
+"True, my friend; therefore you will be well prepared to enjoy the
+pictorial attractions which I am about to unfold."
+
+VOICE. "H'ist the rag."
+
+"My friend--who has no doubt paid his quarter--I respect your request.
+The rag _is_ about to be h'isted. But, before that ceremony is proceeded
+with, I would ask the gentlemen sitting nearest the candles to be good
+enough to blow them out."
+
+Never was request more cheerfully complied with. There was a scramble of
+six or seven tall young men to each candle; and, at several of the
+candles, a brisk but friendly struggle took place between rival
+aspirants for the privilege. The room was then in total darkness, save a
+small gleam which came through the partly opened door from a solitary
+tallow in the entry, and the dull reflection of the panorama lights
+through the curtain.
+
+Some of the effects of this sudden extinguishment were extraordinary.
+The female seminary all screamed slightly. The boys' school all laughed,
+and several were heard to say, "Prime fun, a'n't it?" The railroad
+conductor and his friends coughed fictitiously, and said, "Oh! oh!"
+"A'n't you ashamed!" "Look out for pockets!" "Thief in the house!" and
+other playful things, which put the entire audience in good humor. But
+the strangest and most unexpected occurrence, was a grand rush, as of a
+herd of wild bulls, on the stairs, accompanied by the dousing of the one
+remaining light in the entry. Another moment, and over a hundred of the
+choicest juvenile spirits tore into the hall, and knocked over each
+other and everybody else in a frantic contest for free seats. The young
+ladies' seminary screamed in concert, and all the elderly ladies cried,
+"Oh my!" "Good gracious!" "What's that?"
+
+"Only the boys," said Tiffles, with unruffled composure. "Let them come.
+It is a moral entertainment, and will do them good."
+
+After a pause of about three minutes, giving the boys time to seat
+themselves, and the screams, mutterings, and laughter of the rest of the
+audience to die away, Tiffles said:
+
+"Now, ladies and gentlemen, I will introduce you to sunrise, in the
+Bight of Benin."
+
+This was the preconcerted signal for the raising of the curtain, which
+office was performed by Patching, without a hitch. The gorgeous proem,
+or introduction to the panorama, was then for the first time disclosed
+to the public. Patching blushed as he thought of the vile pandering to
+popular taste of which he had been guilty.
+
+There was a dead calm for a minute. Tiffles was silent, in order that he
+might not interrupt the quiet admiration of the spectators. The
+spectators were silent, because they could not exactly understand the
+scene, and did not know whether to laugh, hiss, or applaud. The silence
+was broken, by a boy in the back part of the hall:
+
+"I say, Mister, is that a cartwheel on top of a stonewall?"
+
+"No, sonny not exactly," said Tiffles. "What your uneducated eyes
+mistake for a cartwheel is the rising sun. The objects that your
+immature judgment confounds with spokes, are rays. Your stone wall, it
+is hardly necessary to inform riper intellects, is a distant range of
+mountains. It is one of Ceccarini's happiest efforts."
+
+"Hurrah for Checkerberry!" cried another lad, mistaking the name of the
+high (imaginary) Italian artist.
+
+"Are we to understand, sir, that this is a rolling prairie in the
+foreground?" asked a deep voice, which Tiffles at once recognized as
+emanating from C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.
+
+"Oh! no, sir; it is the Bight of Benin; and I must say, though, perhaps,
+I am too partial, that Ceccarini never did a better thing."
+
+"The _what_ of Benin?" asked the voice.
+
+"The Bight--or, in other words, as you may not be familiar with
+geography, the Bay of Benin."
+
+"Then why not say Bay, sir?" replied C. Skimmerhorn Esq., stung with the
+allusion to his want of geographical knowledge. "Why this mystery
+about terms!"
+
+There were cries of "Go it, Square." "Dry up, old boy!" "Propel with the
+show!" &c., &c. Tiffles adopted the latter suggestion, and without
+answering the lawyer's insinuation, proceeded to point out the natural
+appearance of the waves, the truthfulness of the distant mountains, the
+absolute fidelity of the sunrise. "And here let me answer an
+objection in advance. It may be said that this sunrise does not
+look like a sunrise in Jersey. Admit it. Neither do the snakes
+(_sensation_)--neither do the snakes which I am about, to exhibit
+(_increased sensation_ and Oh! me's! from the Young Ladies' Seminary)
+resemble the familiar green or striped serpent of your own peaceful
+fields. Neither do the tigers, which I shall presently have the honor of
+showing to you _(renewed sensation)_, bear any marked affinity to the
+serene woodchuck that burrows in your happy hills. The sunrises and
+sunsets, the boa constrictors, the tigers, and the other phenomena of
+Africa, are all immense, gorgeous, and peculiar. They must be judged by
+themselves, and not by comparison. My hearers will be kind enough to
+bear this in mind, as we go on."
+
+He then went on to repeat a great many statistics concerning the
+population and resources of Africa. He had read up for these facts and
+figures, under the impression that they would interest the solid portion
+of his audience. But he soon found out that he interested nobody
+(perhaps because the solid portion of audiences is a myth), and finally
+yielded to general requests of "Push ahead!" "Fire away!" "Start your
+train!" (the latter from the gentlemanly conductor and friends.)
+
+Tiffles therefore whistled once, and the panorama commenced moving
+slowly and steadily. The idiot, the rollers, and the lights, all
+worked well.
+
+From the Bight of Benin, the voyaging spectators took an excursion up
+the river.
+
+The uninterrupted stretch of deep blue for water, and light blue for
+sky, and green for the farther bank, with occasional palm trees looking
+like long-handled pickaxes, seemed to satisfy them. At any rate they
+looked on, and found no fault in words; which both Tiffles and Patching
+took for an auspicious sign. Tiffles kept step with his explanations.
+
+His method was this. When the palm tree came in sight, he would give a
+minute account of that noble tropical growth, and the many uses to which
+it and its products could be put. When a flock of wild ducks appeared
+sailing majestically on the river, he would entertain his auditors with
+a circumstantial description of how the natives caught wild ducks. A
+boat or hollow log, with a human figure, suggested a reference to the
+progress which the African had made in marine architecture and the
+science of navigation. In this way, Tiffles thought he was beguiling his
+customers. Some low sounds, like suppressed hisses, soon convinced him
+of his error.
+
+"I beg your pardon, Professor," said a thick-set voice, which he always
+recognized as coming from C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.; "but it seems to me that
+this portion of your panorama is a little monotonous. I presume that in
+this suggestion, I express the sentiments of my fellow citizens here
+assembled." Cries of "Go on, Square!" "That's so!" mingled with a
+vigorous stamping of feet and catcalls from the boys in the background,
+proved, alas! the truth of the conjecture.
+
+Tiffles coughed twice for the idiot to stop, and was sagaciously obeyed.
+"In behalf of Africa," he remarked, "representing her, as I may say, on
+this occasion, I would beg leave to apologize to the learned gentleman
+for the poverty of her scenery, at this stage of the panorama. If Africa
+had been aware of the learned gentleman's preferences, she would,
+doubtless, have got up some stunning effects for him in places where now
+you see only a river, a sky, and a strip of green bank, all unadorned,
+precisely as they are."
+
+The exquisite irony of this retort pleased the audience, and elicited
+general though faint applause, and several cries of "Shut up, Skim!"
+"Got your match, old boy!" "Oh! let the man go on!" The last remark
+issued from the gentlemanly conductor, and fell with peculiar pleasure
+on Tiffles's ears.
+
+"One word more, and I am done," resumed the lawyer, who was
+professionally calm amid scenes of disturbance. "I only wish to elicit
+the truth. Have you, and your artist (Mr. Chicory, I think you call
+him), or either of you, actually gone over the scenery here represented.
+We wish to understand that point!"
+
+"We have, both of us, gone over this scenery repeatedly." This was true,
+as both Tiffles and Patching, anticipating some such question, had
+stepped over the canvas back and forth, in rolling and unrolling it,
+several times. "Is the eminent counsellor satisfied?"
+
+"Oh! yes," said C. Skimmerhorn, Esq., in a voice which signified that
+he knew the panorama was a humbug, but, unfortunately, couldn't
+prove it.
+
+One cough, and the panorama started again--but a little too fast.
+Tiffles stamped once, and the idiot reduced the speed, until it was too
+slow. Two stamps brought it right. The river soon disappeared in a
+swamp, where the alligators' heads protruding above the water gave
+Tiffles an opportunity to describe several terrific combats which he had
+enjoyed with those pugnacious creatures. This entertained the audience
+for several minutes.
+
+"Have you no full views of alligators, sir?" asked a voice which Tiffles
+presumed, from its solemn inflection, to come from a clergyman.
+
+"None at all, sir. The African alligator persists in keeping out of
+sight. You never see anything but his head--except his tail, as
+represented here." Tiffles pointed with his wand to something that
+looked like the end of a fence rail sticking out of the water. "True
+Art, sir, sacrifices effect for Truth."
+
+"Certainly, sir. Truth is what we are all after," replied the clergyman.
+But there was an indefinable something in his voice that indicated a
+wish for more alligator--much more.
+
+The swamp ended in a dry jungle, interspersed with palm trees,
+elephants, lions, tigers, and serpents. Tiffles counted upon interesting
+his audience here. Snakes were first on the list. Two heads, with
+expanded jaws and forked tongues, were looking at each other above the
+jungle, and two tails were interlocked, also above the jungle, a few
+feet off. This conveyed the idea of two boa constrictors fighting. Other
+heads and other tails--there was always a tail for every head--stuck up
+at regular intervals about. He stopped the panorama with a cough,
+and said:
+
+"The entire population of this particular jungle are--boa constrictors
+of unprecedented size and ferocity."
+
+Tiffles heard a rustle of fans and dresses not far off. It was the
+whole female seminary shuddering. There was also a general movement
+throughout the audience as of people adjusting themselves to obtain a
+good sight.
+
+"These boa constrictors, so admirably delineated here,"--commenced
+Tiffles.
+
+"Where?" said the voice of a country gentleman. "I don't see any bore
+constructors."
+
+"Nor I." "Nor I." "Trot 'em out!" "Show 'em up!" "Produce your snakes!"
+Such were the remarks that resounded through the hall.
+
+"Oh, no!" "Don't!" "Please don't!" emanated from several girlish voices.
+
+"My fair auditors have no cause for alarm. I have no living snakes to
+show. I might have captured several hundred, and brought them to this
+country and exhibited them, but, in deference to the well-known aversion
+cherished toward snakes by cultivated communities, I forbore to do so.
+The only boa constrictors that I have, are now before you. These are
+their heads. These their tails" (indicating the termini of the snakes).
+
+Now, the spectators--or a large number of them--had suffered fearful
+expectations of seeing real snakes. When, therefore, it was announced
+that these harmless daubs, resembling, at a distance, some variety of
+tropical vegetation, were the only snakes they were to see, there was a
+feeling, first, of relief, and then of disappointment.
+
+The disappointment manifested itself in low hisses, and exclamations,
+such as "Humbug!" "Gammon!" "Swindle!" Tiffles made several beginnings
+of excellent snake stories, of which he was the hero, but was checked by
+the tumult. Finding the snakes were not popular, he determined to try
+the tigers, lions, and other beasts of prey farther on. He coughed once
+emphatically, and the canvas moved like clockwork.
+
+Before it had journeyed five feet, somebody on the front row of seats
+coughed twice in precisely the same manner as Tiffles. The idiot,
+supposing the signal came from his employer, stopped. Tiffles,
+perceiving the mistake, coughed again, and the motion was resumed; when
+a double cough resounded from the front seat, and the motion ceased.
+
+Then Tiffles realized that his system of signals was understood by
+somebody. What should he do? He could not stop the free, universal right
+to cough. Therefore he stepped to the corner of the curtain, raised it,
+and said, in a voice loud enough to be heard by the audience, "Stoop,
+whenever I want you to 'stop,' or 'go on,' or 'faster,' or 'slower,' I
+will say so. You understand?"
+
+"Puffickly," replied the gifted idiot.
+
+"I say, boys, Stoop's in there," shouted the somebody that had coughed.
+
+"Stoop!" "Stoop!" "Bully for Stoop!" "Come out o' that, Stoop!" was
+shouted all over the house; but Stoop remained faithful to his post, and
+calmly ground away at the crank.
+
+Suddenly it occurred to some boy to yell, "Boo! boo!" whereat the other
+boys laughed, and took up the chorus, "Boo! boo!"
+
+The canvas moved less steadily, slackening for a moment, and then
+shooting ahead, as if the propelling power were the subject of strange
+perturbation. The roguish boys, and the men too, and, chief of them,
+that practical humorist of a conductor, observing this, screamed, "Boo!
+boo! boo I boo!" all the louder. Tiffles knew that the critical time had
+come, and philosophically laughed at the ruin of his last grand project,
+as he had laughed at the ruin of forty other grand projects in
+their day.
+
+The panorama stopped without a signal this time. A hoarse voice
+screamed, "Gorryfus! Gosh thunder! By jimminy!" The curtain was jerked
+aside, and Stoop rushed into the hall like a fury. Coming out of a place
+partly lighted into one totally dark, his first move was to run blindly
+into Tiffles, nearly knocking that gentleman off his legs.
+
+"Hold on, Stoop! Hold on!" shouted Tiffles, with what was left of his
+breath. But the idiot only screamed, "Gosh thunder! Gorryfus!" and
+darted for the main aisle, intending to run a muck among his
+persecutors. There was a general scrambling of the boys to avoid this
+incarnated wrath. The whole female seminary, and all the ladies present,
+screamed together.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+SCENES NOT IN THE BILLS.
+
+The enraged idiot struck out right and left, without hurting
+anybody--the objects of his vengeance contriving to elude him in the
+dark. Most of the sturdy blows which he dealt, using his arms like
+flails, fell upon the railings of the seats, and only bruised his hands.
+Just as he had caught a boy by the collar, and was about to take a twist
+in his hair, the door opened, and a light appeared. It came from three
+candles borne by three men.
+
+This apparition caused the furious idiot to suspend hostilities on the
+instant.
+
+All eyes were turned toward the three men. All voices were hushed. There
+was a whisper in the air that something strange was about to happen.
+
+The man who entered first was a stranger, who moved and looked about in
+the quick, nervous way born of city life. The other two men were
+well-known residents of the village. Some of the audience had had
+unpleasant cause to know them.
+
+Having locked the door, and stationed his associates in a position to
+command the windows, the stranger walked quickly up the aisle, bearing
+his lighted candle, and said, in a loud voice, which fell strangely on
+the hushed assemblage:
+
+"Marcus Wilkeson will be kind enough to give himself up. Upon my honor,
+he cannot escape." This was said with a charming politeness.
+
+A tall figure arose at the wall end of one of the back seats. "I am
+Marcus Wilkeson. What do you want with me, sir?" His voice trembled, and
+his face was livid.
+
+"To go with me to New York, Mr. Wilkeson," said the tall stranger,
+quickly. "Thank you for your promptness in answering. The only clue that
+I had, was the hasty measure I took of you this morning, when I was
+watching for an escaped convict at Cortlandt-street ferry. Perhaps you
+remember seeing me there, sir?"
+
+Marcus, though the sudden shock had almost stunned him, at once recalled
+the man who had eyed him narrowly at the ferry that morning.
+
+The two other candle bearers had stepped forward as Marcus declared
+himself, and were about to lay hold of him, when the first man smilingly
+pushed them back, and said:
+
+"Don't touch him. It's all right. Mr. Wilkeson is a gentleman, and will
+go quietly."
+
+To Marcus he said, apologetically:
+
+"Two Jersey constables I got to assist me. They don't do things exactly
+in the style of Detective Leffingwell."
+
+Marcus recognized the name; and so terrified was he at the thoughts
+which it conjured up, that his tongue clove to the roof of his mouth.
+The scene was like a horrid dream.
+
+"Everything is regular, sir," continued the detective. "We have a
+requisition for you from the Governor of this State. It was obtained by
+telegraph from Trenton. You will excuse my dropping on you in this way;
+but I wanted to take you to New York to-night, as the inquest meets
+again at ten o'clock to-morrow morning."
+
+"The inquest!--what inquest? Tell me, in God's name!" said Marcus,
+finding his voice at last.
+
+"Inquest! There must have been a murder committed." "What is it?" "Tell
+us, Mr. Policeman." The question was asked on all sides.
+
+"Now I _didn't_ want a scene," said Detective Leffingwell, politely,
+"and I won't have one. Mr. Wilkeson and I understand each other. The
+word 'inquest' dropped out of my mouth before I thought."
+
+"As heaven is above us, we do not understand each other!" said Marcus.
+"Tell me, pray tell me at once, or I shall go mad."
+
+"Anything to please you," replied the officer; "but I can't bear these
+explanations in public. It isn't my way of doing business." He then
+leaned forward, and whispered in the ear of Marcus.
+
+"Great God!" was all that Marcus could say. Then he sank to the seat,
+and bowed his head in agony.
+
+Tiffles, who had forced his way to his friend's side during the
+excitement, threw his arms about him, and said:
+
+"Never mind appearances, Marcus. I'll stake my life you are innocent of
+the charge, whatever it is."
+
+"Oh! you're a humbug," remarked C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.
+
+"Call me and my panorama a humbug, if you please; but Mr. Wilkeson is a
+gentleman and a man of honor." Tiffles's face beamed with a strange
+kindness. He looked up, and saw the idiot standing near him. His small
+eyes filled with tears as he gazed with an expression of intelligent
+pity at the crushed man. Tiffles could have hugged the idiot, not only
+as the most sensible man, but the best-hearted one he had seen in
+the village.
+
+C. Skimmerhorn, Esq., would have retorted severely, but his attention,
+and that of all the crowd, was drawn, at that moment, to a citizen who
+came forward, and, in a state of beathless excitement, said he guessed
+he knew what it all meant. He was in New York that afternoon, and read,
+in one of the evening papers, an account of a dreadful murder committed
+on an old man named Minford. The supposed murderer, the paper said, was
+a Mr. Wilkes or Wilkson.
+
+"Now I hope you are satisfied," said Detective Leffingwell, looking
+around with contempt at his hearers.
+
+A slight scream was heard from the corner of a seat near by. From the
+beginning of this unpleasant affair, it was observed that a plainly
+dressed woman--a seamstress accompanying the family of a Mr. Graft--had
+become very pale and nervous, and had been seen to move uneasily in her
+seat. This woman had fainted away. She it was who had stared so
+strangely at Marcus in the car that morning.
+
+Mrs. Graft and her two daughters promptly removed the fainting woman to
+the entry, where the fresh air soon restored her, and she was sent home.
+
+"No wonder the women faint away, when you crowd round here so stupidly,"
+said the officer, momentarily losing his temper. "Please step back, now,
+and let Mr. Wilkeson and me get out. We must leave for New York by the
+next train--and that starts in fifteen minutes." The detective referred
+to his watch. "Are you ready, sir?" tapping Marcus gently on
+the shoulder.
+
+Marcus rose, and displayed a face haggard with grief.
+
+They all whispered, or thought, "He is guilty."
+
+"I am ready," said he; "but I call heaven to witness that I know nothing
+of this crime."
+
+The detective bowed courteously, and then said:
+
+"I also have summons for Mr. Tiffles and Mr. Patching, gentlemen
+connected with this panorama, as witnesses. They will please
+step forward."
+
+"I am Mr. Tiffles," said that person. "Wesley is my panoramic name."
+
+This disclosure caused a small sensation. "I knew the man was a humbug
+from the start," whispered C. Skimmerhorn, Esq., to a friend at his
+elbow. "I'd like to prosecute him for swindling."
+
+"And I am Mr. Patching," exclaimed the artist, presenting himself.
+
+It should be here stated, that, when the disturbances of the evening
+first set in, Patching, in pure disgust at the bad taste of the
+audience, had quietly dropped himself out of the second story window at
+the rear of the stage, and had been skulking in the back lot ever since.
+Having heard, outside, of the arrest of Marcus Wilkeson, on an unknown
+charge, he had plucked up courage and friendship enough to reenter the
+hall, and tender his aid and consolation to that unhappy man. He came in
+just in time to hear his name called.
+
+"So that's the chap they called Chicory, or Checkerberry," whispered C.
+Skimmerhorn, Esq. "Anybody can see he is a swindler by his slouched hat,
+and beard. _Shouldn't_ I enjoy having a good case against him!"
+
+Pigworth, J. P., landlord of the United States Hotel, and Mr. Boolpin,
+proprietor, came forward with their little bills, and demanded immediate
+payment. This financial difficulty was arranged in one minute by the
+genius of Wesley Tiffles. After paying Stoop one dollar and a half (that
+excellent idiot crying, and vowing that he didn't want it), the rest of
+the proceeds, deducting enough for fares to New York, were divided
+equally between the two other creditors; and the panorama and all the
+appurtenances were left as a joint security for remaining obligations.
+The panorama was worth twice the debts, to be cut into window shades.
+After some grumbling, Messrs. Pigworth and Boolpin accepted the terms.
+
+Five minutes later, the polite detective and his party started for New
+York. There was a great number of people at the station to see them off,
+but only one to say "good-by." That one was the man-boy Stoop, who cried
+as if his great, simple heart would break.
+
+
+
+BOOK EIGHTH.
+
+A DRAMATIC INTERLUDE.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE OVERTURE.
+
+It was the last of a delightful series of dramatic nights at Mrs.
+Slapman's; and her house was quite filled with embodied Poetry, Travels,
+Dramatic Literature, Music, Art, and the Sciences.
+
+The dramatic arrangements of Mrs. Slapman's house were simple, but
+effective. A curtain, with rings, hung across the north end of the
+parlor, established the confines of the stage, which was on a level with
+the floor, and covered with green baize to represent rural scenes, or a
+three-ply carpet to indicate refined interiors. Against the wall were
+rollers, from which scenes could be dropped, affording perspectives of
+country, or streets, or gilded saloons, as the necessities of the drama
+required. There were six of these scenes, all painted by Patching (to
+oblige Mrs. Slapman) in his leisure moments, which were numerous; and
+they all exhibited evidences of his style. Six sets of flies, or side
+scenes, matching with the rear views, had been executed by a
+scene-painter's assistant, whom Mrs. Slapman had taken under her
+patronage, and were thought, by some persons, superior to Patching's
+efforts. Such was the belittling criticism to which that great artist
+was constantly subjected. There was a space of about four feet between
+the top of the curtain and the high ceiling. The light from the parlor
+chandelier directly in front, aided by six gas jets behind the scenes,
+made the whole performance and performers as clear as noonday.
+
+This miniature theatre was constructed of portable frames, which could
+be put up or taken down in half an hour, and was the ingenious invention
+of the scene-painter's assistant. When it was removed, the only traces
+of its former presence were two brass-headed spikes in the walls, from
+which the side curtains depended.
+
+These spikes imparted anguish to the mind of Mr. Slapman whenever he
+gazed upon them. Mrs. S. had heard him say, that "some people would look
+well hanging up there." By "some people," he was supposed to mean the
+gentlemen who participated in her dramatic entertainments. Mrs. S. bore
+the cruel remark meekly, merely replying that perhaps he had better try
+the strength of the spikes first, by suspending himself from one
+of them.
+
+The audience, usually numbering about fifty, were seated in chairs,
+which filled the parlor, with the exception of a space of ten feet in
+front of the stage. A fair view of the entire proceedings could be had
+from all but the two back rows of chairs, the occupants of which were
+compelled to imagine the attachment of feet and ankles to the several
+characters of the drama.
+
+From the left wing of the stage a door opened into the hall, affording
+communication by the staircase to the ladies' and gentlemen's dressing
+rooms on the floor above. On the third floor (it was known to some of
+the guests) was the private apartment of Mr. Slapman. A strong smell of
+cigar smoke, as of one fumigating sullenly and furiously, was the
+unvarying proof of his presence in the house. On this eventful night, he
+had been seen, at an early hour, pacing up and down the hall of his
+third floor, belching forth clouds of smoke, like Vesuvius just before a
+fiery eruption.
+
+People who were in the sad secret of Mrs. Slapman's household sorrows,
+looked at each other and smiled, but said nothing; for it was a point of
+good breeding not to allude to him in conversation. The newer guests,
+unaware of the melancholy facts in the case, supposed that the restless
+gentleman on the third floor was some one of Mrs. Slapman's eccentric
+friends, working out an idea. Mrs. Slapman paid no attention to her
+jealous spouse, imagining that he would smoke away his wrath quietly, as
+usual, and not interfere with the evening's amusement. Hitherto, on
+occasions, he had done nothing more disagreeable than to open the parlor
+door furtively, cast one wild look inside, and then suddenly withdraw
+his head, gently slamming the door after him.
+
+The play of the evening was written "expressly for the occasion" by a
+gentleman who had produced one melodrama at a Bowery theatre, and failed
+to produce a large number of melodramas at all the theatres in Broadway.
+Mrs. Slapman, a true patroness of genius, kindly permitted this
+gentleman to prepare all her charades, and gratified him, on several
+occasions by bringing out some of the minor plays from his stuffed
+portfolio.
+
+By eight o'clock all the chairs were filled, and the actors and
+actresses were still lingering over their toilet. After waiting ten
+minutes longer, and crossing and uncrossing their legs repeatedly, the
+audience stamped and whistled very much in the manner of an impatient
+crowd at a real theatre. Mrs. Slapman relished these little ebullitions
+of natural feeling, because it made the illusion of her "Thespian
+parlor" (as she called it) more complete.
+
+At eight and a quarter o'clock, the orchestra, consisting of two flutes
+and a violin, issued from behind the curtain, and seated itself before
+some music stands ranged against the wall. The performers were amateurs
+(two bookkeepers, and a cashier in private life), and could not have
+been hired to play for any amount of money, though they were always
+willing to favor a few friends. Mrs. Slapman humored them in this whim,
+and they played regularly at her private theatricals.
+
+After a few nods and facetious remarks to their friends in the audience
+(familiarities from which a paid orchestra would have been totally cut
+off), the musicians dashed into a new overture, composed by Signor
+Mancussi, also "expressly for the occasion."
+
+This musical composition had been rehearsed the week previous in the
+presence of a select party of amateurs and critics, and had been
+pronounced, by the sub-editor of a weekly paper, "remarkable for its
+breadth and color." Under these circumstances, the overture was listened
+to with much interest at first, which abated as the music progressed.
+Touching the merits of "color" and "breadth" there might be some grounds
+of doubt, but none whatever concerning its "length."
+
+It lasted until twenty minutes of nine; and, toward the close, faint
+scrapings of dissatisfaction were heard, which would have been more
+audible had Signor Mancussi not been present. As the last twang of the
+fiddle died on the air, M. Bartin was heard by several persons to say,
+"Bah! a bad hash from Rossini and Auber." The remark was reported to
+Signor Mancussi, and did not tend to enhance his friendly regards for
+the other gentleman.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+CURTAIN UP.
+
+At eight and three quarters P.M. the curtain was rung up, and discovered
+a rustic scene, in the midst of which Mrs. Slapman (Fidelia) was seated.
+She was dressed in a white frock with low neck, and a flat hat, and was
+trimmed out with red ribbons in all directions. She looked young and
+pretty. Only an anxious knitting of her eyebrows revealed the cares and
+troubles of intellect. Mrs. Slapman was applauded by a unanimous
+clapping of hands. She was seated in a red-velvet rocking chair, at a
+small but costly table, on which stood an expensive vase filled with
+flowers. These properties, though few, were intended to signify
+boundless affluence and luxury. Fidelia languidly waved a jewelled fan,
+and sighed. "Will he never come?" said she.
+
+She had hardly made this remark, when, by a singular coincidence,
+Alberto (Overtop) entered from the left wing, and threw himself, with as
+much grace as his tights would permit, at her feet. She emitted a small
+shriek, and gave him her hand to kiss, which he did with ecstasy.
+Alberto was habited like an Italian gentleman in good circumstances; and
+no one would have suspected his poverty, if he had not commenced the
+dialogue by an affecting allusion to his last _scudi_, which brought
+tears to the eyes of the fair Fidelia.
+
+Such trifling questions as lovers alone can ask and answer then passed
+between them; and at last came the solemn interrogatory from the
+kneeling Alberto: "And will you always love me, dearest?"
+
+Fidelia turned her meek orbs toward the ceiling, raised her hand, said
+"_Forever!_" and was about to add, "I swear," when Bidette (Miss Wick)
+rushed upon the scene with the intelligence, "He comes."
+
+"Who?" asked Alberto.
+
+"My father!" shrieked Fidelia. "Go--that way." She pointed with her
+small alabaster hand to the left wing.
+
+Alberto vanished as per request, while Fidelia, with well-affected
+calmness, commenced humming an opera air, and fanning herself. Bidette,
+the favorite maid, pretended to readjust a flower in her mistress's
+hair. These feminine artifices were to throw the coming father off
+his scent.
+
+But the father (Mr. Johnsone, the junior of a small book-publishing
+house) was sharp eyed, though he lacked spectacles. As he emerged from
+the right wing, he caught a distinct view of a pair of soles
+disappearing in the distance, and benignantly asked: "Who is that,
+my child?"
+
+The child answered: "Only the postman, pa."
+
+"Where is the letter?" he asked.
+
+"Please, sir," interrupted Bidette, observing her mistress's confusion,
+"there wasn't no letter. He mistook the house for another, sir."
+
+The father nodded his head to express his complete satisfaction with
+this explanation, and then told Bidette to leave the spot, as he had
+something of the utmost importance to tell his daughter. Bidette pouted,
+and withdrew, giving a bewitching shake of her striped calico dress, to
+signify her hatred of brutal fathers. This touch of nature drew plaudits
+from those among the audience who were but slightly acquainted with Miss
+Wick. The others looked on with critical indifference.
+
+The father took a chair, thrust out his legs like a reigning prince, and
+proceeded, in a story of unnecessary length, to tell his daughter that
+he owed one hundred and seventy thousand florins to Signor Rodicaso, and
+would be a ruined man in forty-eight hours if that sum were not paid.
+Life, in that event, would be simply insupportable. He had procured a
+pistol to blow out his brains, but had subsequently concluded to make
+one more effort to save himself. He would, therefore, appeal to his
+daughter, _as_ a father, and ask her to marry Signor Rodicaso, and so
+liquidate the debt, to-morrow. He did not wish to influence her
+choice--far from it--but, if she did not consent, he should feel under
+the painful necessity of shooting himself on the spot.
+
+The father produced a pistol, and held it to his left ear.
+
+Fidelia, looking like a marble statue of grief, said, in a low but
+perfectly audible voice: "Stay! I will wed him." This was enunciated
+with the calmness of despair. Not a gesture, nor a twinge of the
+features, nor an accent to indicate emotion of any kind. It was in quiet
+efforts like these that Mrs. Slapman excelled.
+
+When the applause elicited by this stroke of genius had ceased, Mr.
+Chickson (Signor Rodicaso) came rather awkwardly upon the stage. His
+eyes (and, it might be added, his legs) rolled absently about, as if he
+were endeavoring to recall his part, or were in the inward act of
+composing a poem.
+
+"Your future husband, Fidelia," said the father.
+
+Fidelia rose from her seat--still imperturbable.
+
+Chickson advanced with a sliding motion, and then paused, as if he had
+forgotten what to do. Mrs. Slapman was heard to whisper something
+(probably the cue), but he only rolled his eyes heavily in response. A
+look of displeasure marred her serene features, and, instead of fainting
+away in Signor Rodicaso's arms, as she should have done, she dropped
+into the embrace of her father, taking that personage quite
+unexpectedly, and nearly knocking him off his chair.
+
+Chickson projected himself forward at the same time to catch her, and,
+in so doing, lost his balance, and just escaped, by an effort, from
+sprawling on the floor.
+
+Then he looked helplessly at the audience; and there was no longer any
+doubt entertained that Chickson was slightly intoxicated. Getting drunk,
+now and then, was an infirmity of Chickson's genius.
+
+The stage manager had the good sense to ring down the curtain on this
+painful scene, and, the next moment, there was a dull sound, as of
+somebody falling on the floor behind the green baize.
+
+After an interval of fifteen minutes--protracted by the "unexpected
+indisposition" of the poet, and the consequent necessity of intrusting
+Signor Rodicaso to other hands--the curtain rises again, and discloses
+Alberto in a humble cot, surrounded by three-legged stools, and other
+evidences of extreme poverty. He is seated on a rickety table (in
+preference to the greater uncertainty of the stools), his arms are
+folded, and his head droops upon his breast.
+
+In this attitude, he begins to soliloquize, and informs the audience
+(what they did not know before) that, from a clump of shrubbery, he had
+seen fully as much as they of the preceding scene. He does not blame
+Fidelia. Oh! no. In her cruel dilemma, she could do no less. But he
+curses--and curses again--and continues to curse for some time--that
+Fate which deprives him of the "paltry means" (one hundred and seventy
+thousand florins) to buy off the "heartless monster" (Rodicaso). Having
+wreaked himself upon Destiny to his own satisfaction, he suddenly
+remembers that he has not eaten anything for thirty-six hours. He feels
+in all his pockets successively, but finds nothing. He then draws from
+his bosom a portrait of his father, set with antique gems. He gazes upon
+it reverently, kisses it, and says: "Shall I part with this sacred
+memento for vulgar bread? Never! Let me die!" He restores the portrait
+to his bosom, folds his arms again, inclines his head, and shuts his
+eyes, as if preparing to expire comfortably.
+
+All this time, a fat red face, belonging to a corpulent body, has been
+watching the depressed lover from the right wing. As Alberto utters the
+last sad ejaculation, a thick hand attached to a short arm raises a
+kerchief to a pair of small eyes in this fat red face, and wipes them.
+Then the stout gentleman reflects a moment, nods his head approvingly,
+draws forth a wallet, opens it slowly, takes out some paper that rustles
+like bank notes, produces a memorandum book, writes a few lines on one
+of the leaves hastily with a pencil, tears out the leaf, encloses the
+leaf and the bank notes in an envelope, emerges with his entire figure
+into the full light of the stage, walks stealthily toward Alberto with a
+pair of creaking shoes that would have waked the soundest sleeper,
+places the note on the table by his side, raises his hands to heaven,
+murmuring, "God bless the boy!" and retires in the same feline but
+tumultuous manner.
+
+This mysterious visitor was Bignolio (Matthew Maltboy), a rich money
+lender, uncle of Alberto, and commonly reported to be the "tightest old
+skinflint in Venice."
+
+After a pause, scarcely long enough to allow his uncle's heavy footsteps
+to die away in the distance, Alberto came out of his revery. His first
+act was to look at the ceiling, then at the floor, then all about
+him--everywhere but at the note on the table. At last, when nothing else
+remained to be scrutinized, his eyes naturally fell upon this valuable
+communication.
+
+"What is this?" he asked. Then he answered his own question by opening
+the letter, and reading it, as follows:
+
+     Venice, Oct. 16,----.
+
+     Dear Nephew:
+
+     I have watched you, and know all. You are indeed the son of
+     your father, and, I am proud to add, the nephew of your
+     uncle. Enclosed are sixty thousand florins. Go to Jinkerini
+     Bros., on the Rialto, and buy up judgments that they hold
+     against Rodicaso for three times that amount, and offset them
+     against old Corpetto's debts. Rodicaso conceals his property
+     so well, that none has ever been found to satisfy these
+     judgments. Drive a sharp bargain, and show yourself a chip of
+     the old block. Keep the balance for your wedding gift.
+
+     Farewell--till we meet again.
+
+     Bignolio.
+
+"Dear, dear uncle!" exclaimed Alberto, carefully buttoning up his pocket
+over the funds, and kissing the letter in transports of joy. "And only
+yesterday he would not lend me a _scudi_ to get my dinner. Generous man!
+how have I wronged him! Now, Fate, I will floor thee and Rodicaso
+together."
+
+[Exit Alberto, rapidly, by shortest land route to the Rialto.]
+
+Overtop's acting, throughout this difficult scene, was of a superior
+order. Nothing could be more natural, for instance, than the buttoning
+up of his pocket over his uncle's gift. But neither that, nor the other
+strong point, where he exulted in the finest tragedy tones over the
+anticipated downfall of Fate and Rodicaso, produced the slightest
+sensation among his hearers. Matthew Maltboy paid the penalty of his
+intimate relations with Overtop, by an equal unpopularity. His fine
+rendition of the character of Bignolio might as well have been played to
+a select company of gravestones.
+
+There was a necessary interval of twenty minutes for the fitting out of
+the stage--during which time the amateur orchestra performed selections
+from "Semiramide," but, happily, not loud enough to interfere with the
+easy flow of conversation all over the room. The second flutist, while
+looking over his shoulder angrily at the garrulous audience, executed a
+false note, which almost threw the first (and only) violinist into fits.
+In turning round to rebuke the errant performer, the violinist struck
+his elbow against a similar projection of the other flutist, and knocked
+a false note out of that gentleman too, besides momentarily ruffling his
+temper. This little episode diffused unhappiness over the entire music.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+ACT SECOND.
+
+The spectators had been told that there were imposing stage effects in
+the second and last act; and they were not disappointed. The entire
+front was filled with furniture, real mahogany and brocade, leaving
+barely room for human beings to walk about. The background was a
+perspective of pillars, conveying the idea of unlimited saloons, all
+opening into each other. Three Bohemian vases, filled with natural
+flowers, were placed on pedestals in places where they would be least in
+the way, if it were possible to make such a discrimination. But the
+great feature of the scene was a magnificent paper chandelier of nine
+candles, which hung from the centre of the framework, and made every
+spectator, while he admired, tremble with fear that it would set the
+house on fire.
+
+At a small table in front, covered by a rich cloth, sat the heroine,
+dressed in a gorgeousness of apparel that mocked her misery. Beneath the
+gems that studded her bosom, there was supposed to be unappeasable
+wretchedness; and the white brow, covered with a spangled wreath, was
+presumed to ache with mental agony. She was pale and beautiful. Murmurs
+of applause ran round the apartment.
+
+By her side was the faithful Bidette, armed with a bottle of salts. She
+bent affectionately over her mistress, and asked if she wanted anything.
+
+"Nothing, my child--but death," was the thrilling reply.
+
+Bidette was taken somewhat aback. She made a respectful pause. Then she
+said:
+
+"But, my dear mistress, though you do not love Signor Rodicaso--"
+
+"In Heaven's name, stop, child! You are piercing my heart with a hot
+iron. Name not love to me. Henceforth I erase it from the tablets of my
+brain. Now go on" (with tranquil despair).
+
+"I was about to say, dear mistress, please, that Signor Rodicaso has a
+splendid town house, and a beautiful country seat (they say), and
+thousands of acres of land, which will all be yours--"
+
+The eloquent grief of her mistress's face checked the maid.
+
+"Bidette," she said, "I shall want but a small portion of all his
+lands."
+
+"What do you mean, dear mistress?" asked the frightened maid.
+
+"Only enough for--a grave," was the harrowing reply.
+
+This dreary dialogue was here interrupted by the appearance of the
+father in tights, knee buckles, velvet coat, ruffles, a powdered wig,
+and a general air of having been got up for a great occasion. He
+carefully picked his way through the furniture to his daughter, and
+kissed her on the forehead.
+
+"Are you happy, my dear daughter?" he asked.
+
+"Happy? Oh! yes, father, I am _so_ happy! See how I smile." So saying,
+she made a feeble attempt to smile, which was a most artistic failure,
+and brought out another tribute of applause.
+
+The father, not detecting the sad irony of the smile, replied:
+
+"It is indeed fortunate that you are enabled not only to achieve your
+own happiness by this marriage, but also to redeem what is dearer to me
+than all else in this world--my mercantile credit. But here they come."
+
+"Here they come," was the cue which was to bring in Signor Rodicaso and
+party; but the Signor was momentarily delayed by the giving way of two
+buttons in his doublet. When he had repaired damages with pins as well
+as he could, he emerged into view, accompanied by a notary and a pair of
+friendly witnesses. The Signor, this time, proved to be the author of
+the play, who had kindly consented, at five minutes' notice, to take the
+part in which the hapless Chickson had broken down. Stealing behind, in
+the shadow of the others, was distinctly seen (by all except the people
+on the stage) the burly form of Uncle Bignolio.
+
+To satisfy the conventional idea of dramatic concealment, his left leg
+was plunged in obscurity behind the scenes, while the rest of his figure
+stood out in bold relief. He was observed, by those who watched him
+narrowly, to send a pleasant wink and nod to Bidette, who responded with
+a scarcely perceptible pout.
+
+On the entrance of Signor Rodicaso and friends, Fidelia rose, turned
+toward them, and made a profound courtesy, as if to signify her abject
+submission. Signor Rodicaso bowed with equal profundity, and straightway
+proceeded to make a speech to the lady, in which he spoke of the wild
+idolatry that he had long felt for her, and alluded most disparagingly
+to his own merits. If the Signor's statements could be relied on, he was
+totally unworthy of an alliance with the beautiful Fidelia; in fact, was
+a "dog who would be proud only but to bask in the sunshine of
+her smile."
+
+This singular address, extending over "one length," or forty-five lines,
+excited little less astonishment on the stage than in the audience. For
+it was not set down in the acting copy, but had been improvised by the
+author, to better the part of the Signor, which, as originally written,
+was destitute of Long and effective orations.
+
+Fidelia smiled, and could only reply to this unpremeditated effusion by
+several modest inclinations of the head. The other actors and actress
+turned aside to conceal their grins. Uncle Bignolio alone fulfilled the
+requirements of his part, by casting Mephistophelean leers at the
+Signor, and now and then stealthily shaking his fists at him.
+
+The father, not being apt at off-hand oratory, did not attempt any
+response to this speech, but merely bowed, to express his perfect
+agreement in everything that had been said, and waved his hand toward a
+table in the rear of the stage, as if to say, "Let us proceed to
+business."
+
+The notary, taking the hint, seated himself at the table, opened his
+black bag, drew forth a document from it, and spread it out. Then he
+dipped a pen into an inkstand, and said:
+
+"We now await the signing of the contract of marriage between Signor
+Alessandro Arturo Rodicaso, gentleman, and Signorina Giulia Innocenza
+Fidelia Corpetto, only daughter of Signor Francesco Corpetto, merchant."
+
+In the absence of any definite information on the Venetian formula
+adopted in such cases, the author had selected this style of
+announcement as being sufficiently stiff and imposing.
+
+Signor Rodicaso sprang forward with joyful alacrity to sign the
+contract, dashing off his name in two strokes, as is the invariable
+custom on the stage.
+
+The climax of the drama had now arrived, and everybody stood aside for
+the wretched Fidelia. Mrs. Slapman proved equal to the great occasion.
+Directing one look to heaven, as if for strength, and pressing a hand
+over the jewelled bodice which covered her bursting heart, she walked
+with firm steps toward the fatal table. Never in her life had she been
+more grandly simple. It was sublime!
+
+As Fidelia came up to the little table, she faltered, and leaned upon it
+to support herself; then, with a nervous motion, grasped the pen.
+Several times she dipped the pen in the empty inkstand, and each time
+her face assumed a look of more settled anguish. Then, bracing all her
+nerves for the decisive act of woman's life, she put down the pen
+boldly on the paper, and made one up stroke. Before she could make the
+other down stroke which was necessary to complete her signature, a wild
+figure, with hair dishevelled, and other evidences of hasty purpose,
+burst upon the stage.
+
+Fidelia paused; all stood back; and gentlemen who had swords laid hands
+on them.
+
+"Who is this?" asked the Father, with mercantile calmness.
+
+"Who dares thus break in upon my happiness?" inquired Signor Rodicaso.
+
+"Know you not, young man, that you are committing a breach of the
+peace?" remarked the notary, regarding the intrusion with the eye of
+a lawyer.
+
+The wild figure answered them all at once: "I am Alberto, and I come to
+rend this impious contract--thus--thus--thus!" (snatching the parchment
+from the table, tearing it to pieces, and trampling on it).
+
+Fidelia, astonished at the turn events were taking, leaned back in her
+chair, and looked on silently. Her time for fainting had not yet come.
+
+"Draw and defend yourself, caitiff!" exclaimed Signor Rodicaso,
+brandishing his sword.
+
+"Anywhere but in the presence of a lady," was the sarcastic reply.
+"Besides, I have claims on you, which, perhaps may teach you to
+respect me."
+
+"Claims! Thou liest! What claims?"
+
+"These! Hast seen them before? Ha! ha!" shouted Alberto, shaking a
+bundle of papers in the face of his rival.
+
+"Allow me to examine them, if you please?" asked Signor Rodicaso, with
+forced calmness.
+
+"No, you don't," was the response. "But I'll tell you what they are.
+They are judgments to the extent of one hundred and seventy thousand
+florins--dost hear? one hundred and seventy thousand florins--against
+you, which I have bought for less than quarter price from Jinkerini
+Bros, No. 124 Rialto. With them I offset the sum which this unhappy but
+excellent merchant" (pointing to the father) "owes you. Here, sir; now
+you are released from yon monster's clutches." (Hands package of
+judgments to the father, who, overpowered by the scene, takes and holds
+them in dumb amazement.)
+
+An expression of silent joy begins to steal over the face of Fidelia.
+But her time for fainting had not yet come!
+
+"Boy!" said Signor Rodicaso, with a composure that was perfectly
+wonderful, "there is another hand than thine in all this work. Thou art
+but the poor tool and I despise thee!"
+
+"Here is the hand!" exclaimed the uncle Bignolio, drawing out his leg
+from its seclusion, and bringing his whole body into full view. "Dost
+know it?" He held up his right hand, to carry out the idea of
+the author.
+
+"It is the hand of Bignolio the usurer," said Signor Rodicaso,
+despondingly, seeing now that the game was clearly against him.
+
+"Bignolio the usurer!" exclaimed the father, still wrapped in amazement.
+
+"Bignolio the usurer!" murmured Fidelia, whose woman's wit divined the
+mystery of his appearance. But her time to faint had not _yet_ come.
+
+"Bignolio the usurer!" cried the notary, witnesses, and Bidette in
+chorus.
+
+"Yes," returned that gentleman; "Bignolio the _usurer,_ who now is proud
+to claim the dearer title of 'own uncle' to his nephew Alberto. That
+nephew he this day receives into his partnership, and proclaims his only
+heir. Come to my arms, adopted son!"
+
+Alberto flew to his uncle, and was silently embraced. Even at this
+moment, sacred to the interchange of the noblest affections, several
+persons in the audience distinctly saw the uncle's left eye wink over
+Alberto's shoulder to Bidette, who responded to the unwelcome
+familiarity, this time, with an indignant frown.
+
+The nephew gently uncoiled his uncle, and addressed himself to the
+father:
+
+"Respected sir, I have long loved your daughter, and am not totally
+unprepared to believe that she may, in some slight measure, reciprocate
+my affections. I humbly solicit her hand in marriage."
+
+The father, with the characteristic decision of an old man of business,
+had already made up his mind. Alberto, the young partner and heir of the
+rich usurer of Venice, would be a more manageable son-in-law than the
+middle-aged though wealthy Rodicaso. The father said words to this
+effect in an "aside," and then replied aloud:
+
+"Her hand is yours; and may your union be crowned with felicity. Come,
+children, and receive a parent's blessing."
+
+"My bitter curse be on you all! Boy, we shall meet again!" shouted
+Rodicaso, striding off the stage, and followed by the notary for his
+pay, and by the laughter and scorn of the rest of the company.
+
+Fidelia's little cup of earthly happiness was now full. Her time for
+fainting had arrived at last. Everybody moved to clear a space for her.
+She rose, and walked with an unfaltering step toward Alberto. There was
+no overdone rapture in her gait; no exaggerated ecstasy in her face. As
+a practised critic remarked, "her calmness was the truest expression of
+her agony of joy."
+
+Alberto advanced halfway with a lover's ardor, and extended his arms.
+Then was her time to faint; and she fainted with a slight scream,
+sinking gently upon a faithful breast.
+
+The father raised his hands above the couple, and blessed them in the
+correct way, never seen off the stage. Uncle Bignolio wiped his eyes,
+and murmured, "Dear boy! How much he looks like his father now!"--a
+remark somewhat out of place, considering that Alberto's back was turned
+to the uncle. Bidette hovered near the happy group, and danced for joy.
+
+It was a touching tableau, and the spectators applauded it In a way
+that tickled the heart of the author, who was watching the effect
+through an eyehole of the left wing.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+HOW THE PLAY ENDED.
+
+Just as the curtain was to be rung down on the end of the play, a mad
+clatter of boots was heard behind the scenes. Then a man, dressed in
+complete black, and excessively pale, jumped upon the stage. His black
+hair was tossed all over his head, and his black eyes were rolling
+wildly. Thus much all the spectators saw at a glance.
+
+The strange man's first intention appeared to be to dash at the happy
+couple; but, if so, he checked himself, and, standing at a distance of
+four feet from them, uttered these words: "Scoundrel! what are you doing
+with my wife there?" The man's whole figure could be seen to tremble.
+
+Many of the spectators, supposing this was a part of the play--though
+they did not see its precise connection with the plot--applauded what
+was apparently a fine piece of acting.
+
+"Good!" "Capital!" "Bravo!" were heard from all parts of the room,
+mingled with stamping and clapping.
+
+The man darted looks of concentrated hate at the audience.
+
+"Who is he?" "How well he does it!" "What splendid tragedy powers!" were
+some of the audible remarks that this called forth.
+
+It was also observed that a wonderfully natural style of acting was
+instantly developed among the other _dramatis personae_. Fidelia sprang
+from the arms of Alberto, and put on a lifelike expression of insulted
+dignity, mingled with astonishment. Alberto took a step away from the
+ghastly intruder, and was evidently at a loss what to do. His face was
+eloquent with bewilderment and mortification. The father looked confused
+and sheepish, and put his hands into his pockets. Bidette screamed a
+little, and fled to the opposite scenes. Uncle Bignolio whistled and
+smiled, and was evidently amused at the occurrence.
+
+All this, done in five seconds, so delighted the spectators, that they
+cheered, and cheered again. "As good as a theatre!" ejaculated a new
+friend of Mrs. Slapman's, on the front row.
+
+The strange, disorderly man plunged forward with one leg toward Alberto,
+and then drew himself back suddenly, as if in a state of harassing
+indecision. (Applause.) Then he cast a diabolical look (worthy of the
+elder Booth in Richard III) at the young lover, and shrieked, "Wretch!
+villain! I will--I will--" He hesitated to add what he would do, but
+shook his fists in a highly natural manner at the object of his hate.
+(Great applause.)
+
+"Sir!" said Fidelia, stretching her proud young form erect, like a
+tragedy queen, "How dare you, sir!" (Boisterous applause, and this
+remark from an elderly gentleman: "The picture of Mrs. Siddons!")
+
+The singular individual in black was seen to tremble with increased
+violence. His eyes rolled more wildly, while his face took on a chalkier
+hue. He stepped back, as if to insure his retreat. Then, mustering all
+his resolution, he said:
+
+"M-Mrs. M-Mrs. Slapman, you--you ought to be a-ashamed of yourself!"
+
+The real character of the strange actor was now made evident, and the
+whole house was hushed in awe and expectation. There was not a man or
+woman present but knew too well the folly of mingling in a family
+quarrel. So they held their tongues, and enjoyed the scene.
+
+Mrs. Slapman turned to the audience. She was pale, but perfectly
+composed. She said:
+
+"Ladies and gentlemen, this is my husband, a very quiet and well-behaved
+man, whose only fault is excessive nervousness. This fault, I am sorry
+to say, he encourages, by constantly smoking cigars and drinking strong
+black tea. He has been indulging in both of these stimulants to-night,
+till he is quite beside himself. I trust you will excuse and pity him.
+He has no other vices that I know of."
+
+Then, turning to her husband, whose hands had now dropped listlessly by
+his side, she added:
+
+"My dear, bathe your head, and go to bed immediately."
+
+He struggled to say something in the presence of this calm embodiment of
+satire, but could not. Hanging down his head, and looking very silly, he
+slinked off the stage.
+
+"Now, ladies and gentlemen," said Mrs. Slapman, "after an interval of
+fifteen minutes, we will proceed with the comedietta of 'A Morning
+Call,' as if nothing had happened."
+
+When she had said this, Mrs. Slapman fainted--this time in earnest. She
+was caught in the arms of Fayette Overtop, who immediately, and with the
+utmost delicacy, resigned her to the arms of Miss Wick (Bidette), and of
+several other ladies, who came upon the stage and proffered salts,
+cologne, and other restoratives.
+
+The gentlemen present, actors and audience, unanimously decided that the
+best thing for them to do, under all the circumstances, was to leave
+the premises.
+
+This they did as soon as they could, reserving all discussion of the
+painful event of the evening for the free air of the street.
+
+As Overtop, very serious, and Maltboy, very jovial, were about to
+descend the steps to the sidewalk, they were met by a messenger, who
+desired them to go with him immediately to the station house to see some
+friends (names forgotten) who had been arrested, and had sent for them.
+
+Thither they went, and experienced the greatest surprise of the evening.
+
+
+
+BOOK NINTH.
+
+THE INQUEST.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+Coroner and Jury.
+
+The post-mortem examination had been held; and three doctors had sworn
+that deceased came to his death from a great variety of Greek and Latin
+troubles, all caused by a learned something which signified, in plain
+English, a blow on the head. Coroner Bullfast was so struck with the
+clear and explicit nature of the medical evidence, that he had it
+reduced to writing for his private regalement.
+
+The post-mortem examination, and the testimony of the three doctors, and
+of all the people in the house (except Patty Minford, daughter of the
+deceased)--whose joint knowledge upon the subject amounted to nothing
+more than hearing somebody with heavy boots come down stairs about
+midnight--occupied the whole of the first day. Patty, or Pet, was so
+thoroughly unnerved by the events of that horrible night, that the
+coroner found it impossible to take her evidence on that day. She had
+fainted twice before she could make Coroner Bullfast clearly understand
+that Marcus Wilkeson, her benefactor, and her father's best friend, was
+THE MURDERER. Having learned thus much, the coroner had put the police
+on the track of Marcus Wilkeson, and had postponed the further
+examination of the chief witness.
+
+Mrs. Crull, on learning of the tragic affair, had gone in person to the
+house of death, and taken Patty to her own home.
+
+The remains of the unfortunate inventor had been removed to the nearest
+undertaker's for interment, at the expense of Mrs. Crull. The apartments
+had been diligently searched, and the personal effects of the deceased
+examined, under the direction of the coroner. A number of documents had
+been discovered, which, in the coroner's opinion, threw a flood of light
+on the motives that led to the crime. A few dollars and a bull's-eye
+silver watch, found on the dead body, precluded the idea that the murder
+was done for plunder. With that quickness of perception for which
+Coroner Bullfast, like most of his official kind, was celebrated, he had
+formed his theory of the murder, and tremendously strong must be the
+future testimony that could shake it.
+
+On the morning of the second day, Coroner Bullfast and the jury
+reassembled, about ten o'clock, in the room where the murder was
+committed.
+
+The coroner was a jovial man, with a bulging forehead, a ruddy nose, a
+large diamond breastpin (a real diamond, of that superlative style only
+seen in its perfection on the shirt fronts of aldermen, contractors, and
+Washington Market butchers), and the native New York manner of speaking,
+which is sharp and mandatory. The coroner began life as a stone mason,
+gained early distinction as a fireman, controlled several hundred votes
+in his ward, became a member of a political committee, and got a
+coronership as his share of the spoils. He had aspired to be a police
+justice, or city inspector, or commissioner of the Croton Board. To
+either of these positions, or, for that matter, to any position
+indefinitely higher, he felt himself perfectly equal. But other members
+of the committee (which was a kind of joint-stock company for the
+distribution of offices) had prior and stronger claims than Harry
+Bullfast, and so he was put off with a coronership. He felt the slight
+acutely, but, like a prudent man, determined to so keep himself before
+the public in his performance of the office, as to make it a stepping
+stone to something much higher--the city comptrollership, or a seat in
+the State Senate, or in Congress, or (who could tell?) the governorship
+of the commonwealth--that grand possibility which every ward politician
+carries in his hat.
+
+The coroner was seated in the inventor's private armchair, with one leg
+thrown over the side of it, and the other stretched on the floor. He was
+chewing tobacco with manly vigor, and cracking jokes with a facetious
+juryman, who was assistant foreman of the Bully Boy Hose, of which the
+coroner was an exempt and honorary member.
+
+The jury was composed of six men whom the coroner had picked from the
+large number of idle spectators found by him at the scene of the murder
+when he was first summoned. Two of them chanced to be acquaintances of
+his. As to the rest, the coroner had not the remotest idea. They might
+have been beggars or pickpockets, for aught that he cared. They looked
+stupid, and he liked stupid jurors.
+
+"Them sharp fellers that thinks they knows more'n the cor'ner, is a
+cussed nuisance," he often had occasion to remark.
+
+The jury sat near one of the windows, in a semicircle of chairs which
+had been borrowed from the first and second floors. Pending the
+resumption of their melancholy work, such of them as could read were
+reading newspapers containing reports of the first day's proceedings,
+from two to ten columns long, wherein the scene of the "Mysterious
+Midnight Tragedy," as one paper called it, was represented in the most
+ingenious manner by printers' rules cut to show the dimensions of the
+rooms on the third floor, the position of the fireplace, bed, washstand,
+chest of drawers, unknown machine in the corner, and other things which
+had no bearing whatever on the affair. The other jurors, who could not
+read at all, or had an insuperable aversion to that laborious
+occupation, were rolling their quids in silence, and looking wise.
+
+At a long table in the centre of the room were seated several young
+gentlemen, dressed with singular independence of style. From one point
+of view they looked like actors, bearing about them signs of fatigue, as
+if from heavy night work. Observed again, they resembled young lawyers
+of indolent habits and scanty practice, who had just dropped in to
+watch the case.
+
+From their conversation, no clue to their professional identity could be
+gathered. They were cracking jokes, propounding conundrums, and telling
+stories humorously broad to each other. Everything was to them a
+legitimate amusement. The proceedings of the day before were peculiarly
+rich in funny reminiscences; and one tall, bright, curly-haired fellow
+was evoking roars of suppressed laughter by his capital mimicry of two
+of the dullest witnesses. Another was drawing comic profiles of a sleepy
+juryman on a scrap of paper. He had previously dashed off a very happy
+sketch of the coroner, and shown it to that functionary, who had
+"haw-hawed," and pronounced it "devilish good," and, in turn, presented
+the young artist with a fine Havana cigar, which he playfully put in his
+mouth and chewed the end of. Yet there were, about these young
+gentlemen, signs of business, which an intelligent observer might have
+easily interpreted. From the outside breast pockets of each of them
+protruded a number of pencils; and, from their lower side pockets, thick
+memorandum books with gray covers, or stiffly folded quires of foolscap.
+
+They were the reporters of the press--the gamins and good fellows of
+literature;--fellows of inexhaustible resources, who carry their wits
+literally at their fingers' ends;--who can do more than extract sunbeams
+from cucumbers; for they can make up thrilling facts out of
+nothing;--who can thread their way through a crowd where a tapeworm
+would be squeezed to death;--whose writing desk is usually another man's
+back; and who sketch out a much better speech between an orator's
+shoulder blades than he is making in front;--whose written language is
+a perplexity compared with which Greek is a relaxation and Sanscrit a
+positive amusement;--who deal in adjectives, and know their precise
+value, and how to administer them, as an apothecary knows the drugs that
+are boxed and bottled on his shelves;--who are less men than parts of an
+enormous mill grinding out grist to be branned and bolted in the
+editorial rooms, made into food in the printing office and press vault,
+and served up hot for the public's breakfast next morning.
+
+Clever, witty, insatiable fellows they, for whom a planet ought to be
+set apart, where all the murders are wrapped in impenetrable mystery,
+and the smallest railroad accidents are frightful catastrophes.
+
+The east side of the room, where the dead body had been found, was
+preserved inviolate from the broom, mop, and other touch, until the
+inquest was over. The strange machine stood in its accustomed place,
+flanked by the screen. It had been extensively handled and looked at,
+and passed for a new kind of clock. Two large weights (which had fallen
+to the floor) and the interplaying cogwheels gave force to that
+conjecture.
+
+A large purple spot on the floor showed where the old man's life had
+ebbed away. Close by this spot, precisely where it had been picked up,
+lay the long oaken club with the iron tip, which, it was supposed, had
+done the dreadful deed. There were small splashes and spots on it too.
+
+The fun of the reporters, the chat of the coroner and his friends, the
+readings and airy meditations of the jurors, were all suddenly checked
+by the appearance of Marcus Wilkeson, escorted by two police officers,
+and Messrs. Overtop and Maltboy, Patching and Tiffles. All five had
+passed the night in the station house--Messrs. Patching and Tiffles from
+compulsion, as witnesses, and possible accomplices, and Overtop and
+Maltboy as guides, philosophers, and friends. All looked seedy and
+criminal, as if there were something in the atmosphere of station houses
+to give a man the semblance of a vagabond and an outcast. Marcus
+Wilkeson was very pale, and, when he looked across the room, as he did
+upon his entrance, by a singular impulse, and saw the great blood mark
+and the club on the floor, he trembled with emotion.
+
+The keen eyes of the coroner caught these signs, and he immediately
+brought in a mental verdict of "guilty." Some of the jury observed the
+same signs, and thought them suspicious. The reporters looked upon
+Marcus Wilkeson without emotion or prejudgment. They were so accustomed
+to seeing murderers, that they regarded them simply as a part of the
+business community--a little vicious, perhaps, but not so much worse
+than other people, after all. One reporter, attached to an illustrated
+paper, dashed off the profile of Marcus Wilkeson, under the cover of his
+hat, and caught the dejected expression of his face to a nicety.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+STATEMENT OF THE PRISONER.
+
+The coroner received Marcus with that air of consideration which
+magistrates instinctively bestow upon persons charged with great crimes,
+and informed him, with some respect, that he was brought there to make
+any explanation that he saw fit, touching his connection with "this
+'ere murder."
+
+The party were then accommodated with seats near the jury, and facing
+the reporters. As Marcus looked up, and saw those practised scribes
+sharpening their pencils, his heart sank deeper within him. The vision
+which had troubled him all night, of a broadside notoriety in all the
+city papers, rose before his mind, clothed with fresh horror. The dull
+sound of sharpening those pencils was like the whetting of the
+executioner's knife.
+
+The proper course was to have accepted an unsworn statement from the
+prisoner; but the coroner always administered oaths when prisoners were
+willing to take them. The repetition of that jargon with a profane
+conclusion (for so it seemed, in the slipshod way that it was said),
+which the coroner called an oath, was a positive pleasure to that
+official. As Marcus desired to take the oath, the coroner rattled off
+the unintelligible something, and handed him a Bible, which the prisoner
+pressed reverentially to his lips. Marcus, being now supposed to be
+sworn, proceeded, with what firmness he could muster, to answer the
+numerous interrogatories of the coroner. That official chewed hard, and,
+as it were, spit out his questions.
+
+His testimony, in substance, was this:
+
+That he was a friend of the deceased, and had loaned him one thousand
+dollars to complete a machine upon which he was engaged--pointing to the
+unfinished pile in the corner. That his relations with the deceased and
+his family (Marcus did not like to mention Pet's name) were entirely
+agreeable, until an anonymous letter, charging him with improper motives
+in visiting the house, had poisoned the mind of the deceased against
+him. [The giving up of this letter to the coroner, who read it to the
+jury, and then tossed it over to the reporters for copying, was a hard
+trial, but Marcus had resolved upon meeting all the troubles of the
+case halfway.]
+
+The coroner here produced the second anonymous letter, which had been
+found on the person of the deceased, showed it to Marcus for
+identification, and then threw it to the reporters, as one would throw a
+choice bone to a cage full of hungry animals.
+
+Marcus explained that he had made every effort to discover the
+authorship of the letters, without success; whereupon the coroner shut
+his eyes knowingly, rolled his quid from right to left, and said that he
+was "investigatin' 'em" himself.
+
+QUESTION BY A JUROR. "Wos the letters postpaid?"
+
+ANSWER. "They were."
+
+The juror took the reply into his profoundest consideration.
+
+Marcus, resuming, stated that, on his last visit--the night of the
+supposed murder--he had found Mr. Minford very much disturbed in mind by
+the unjust suspicions aroused by these letters. He had accused witness
+of the vile intentions referred to in them. Witness had denied the
+imputations with emphasis. The discussion was becoming quite warm, when
+the daughter of the deceased entered the room, and, being worn out with
+watching by the side of a sick friend, retired to bed in the adjoining
+chamber. The conversation, broken off by her entrance, was then
+continued, much in the same vein. Mr. Minford was in a distressing state
+of nervous excitement that evening, and talked loud and wild. Witness
+made an effort to keep his temper, and did so, though the peculiar
+injustice of the accusations were enough to arouse any man's anger. He
+reserved his show of wrath for the author of the anonymous letters, if
+he could ever catch him. He would not say that he had not replied to the
+deceased with some warmth of manner. But as to threatening him, or
+hurting one hair of his head, witness had not done it--so help him God!
+
+QUESTION BY A JUROR. "Was the key of the door in the keyhole that
+night?"
+
+ANSWER. "I don't know."
+
+COMMENT BY FACETIOUS JUROR. "Be me sowl, I thinks that whishkay had more
+to do with it than the doorkay. Don't you, Harry?"
+
+CORONER. "Bully for you!"
+
+Clothing himself again with dignity, the coroner asked:
+
+"Der yer mean to say, Mr. Wilkingson, that yer didn't kill this man?
+Remember, now, yer on yer oath!"
+
+The horrible bluntness of the question nearly felled Marcus to the
+floor. He placed his hand on his brow, now pale with the acutest
+anguish. Then he rose, and, looking upward said:
+
+"As God is my judge, and as I hope for heaven, I am innocent of this
+murder, or of any part in it."
+
+"If you please, Mr. Coroner, this gentleman and myself are counsel for
+the accused," said Overtop.
+
+"Oh! you're his counsel. Then the other two are the chaps arrested as
+'complices?"
+
+Patching writhed at this. Nor were his feelings relieved by observing,
+with an oblique glance, that the artist of the illustrated paper was in
+the act of taking him.
+
+"I protest," said Wesley Tiffles, rising to his full height, and
+throwing out both arms for a comprehensive gesture, "I protest against
+this arrest and detention as illegal. If the coroner will give me but a
+short hour of his valuable time, I can--"
+
+CORONER _(puffing up_). "The gentleman will be good enough to shut up
+for the present. When we are ready, we will hear what he has to say."
+
+TIFFLES. "I protest, sir. I wish the gentlemanly and intelligent
+reporters to note that I protest--"
+
+CORONER. "Are you, or me, boss here, hey?"
+
+TIFFLES. "Oh! you, of course, sir." The protestant then sank into his
+seat, not wholly disappointed, for he had gained his object of making a
+little newspaper capital by tickling the reporters. He had also
+remarked, with pleasure, that, while he stood erect, with both arms
+outstretched, the artist had secured his full length. Tiffles was fond
+of notoriety, however achieved; and he saw a good opening for it in
+this case.
+
+Overtop here suggested that it would be easy to prove their client's
+innocence. He would respectfully request his Honor to procure the
+testimony of Miss Patty Minford, if she could be found. As she went to
+bed in the adjoining room early that evening, she must have heard some
+noise in connection with the murder--if, indeed, a murder had been
+committed. Overtop's legal education taught him to doubt everything.
+
+Coroner Bullfast was touched with the title of Honor, so skilfully
+applied by Overtop; and he answered, with uncommon sweetness:
+
+"I am expecting Miss Minford every minute, sir. She will speak for
+herself. For the present, sir, I am sorry to say that it was on her
+testimony alone that Mr. Wilkingson was 'rested."
+
+A look of new surprise and horror passed over the pale face of Marcus,
+and Overtop and Maltboy exchanged glances of astonishment.
+
+"Now, Mr. Wilkingson," continued the coroner, taking a fresh chew,
+"please drive ahead with yer statement--if yer choose to. Yer not bound
+to say anythink, yer know."
+
+AN INTELLIGENT JUROR. "Will Mr. Wilkeson tell us about what time he left
+this house that night, and where he went?"
+
+Marcus raised his sunken head, and shook it, as if to dispel a
+stupefaction. Then, in a faint and trembling voice, he replied that he
+looked at his watch just before bidding Mr. Minford "good-night,"
+and-observed that it was fifteen minutes past eleven o'clock.
+
+QUESTION BY A JUROR. "What kind o' watch do you carry?"
+
+ANSWER (_exhibiting the watch_). "An English hunter--- lever
+escapement--- full jewelled."
+
+At any other time, Marcus would have smiled at the impertinence of the
+question, but he answered it gravely.
+
+He then went on to say, that Mr. Minford had not replied to his
+"good-night." That he repeated the salutation, and extended his hand as
+a token of unbroken friendship. That Mr. Minford refused to take it, and
+said that he had one last favor to ask of him (Marcus), and that was,
+never to cross his threshold again. That he (Marcus) responded, "I
+forgive you, sir. When, on reflection, you think that you have done me
+injustice--as you will, at last--send for me, and I will still be your
+friend." That he received no answer to this, save a shake of the head,
+and immediately went down stairs into the street. He was feverish, and
+his brain was in a whirl. Hardly knowing what he did, he walked the
+streets hither and thither. He could not tell what streets he traversed,
+but he kept up the exercise till he was tired. Then he became calmer,
+returned home, entered the house with a latch key, and went to bed
+without waking any of the inmates. On going to bed, he observed that his
+watch marked one o'clock.
+
+An intelligent juror. "You must have passed a large number of people in
+the streets between eleven and one o'clock. Did you see no one whom
+you knew?"
+
+"No one; but at a corner some distance from here,--I could not say what
+corner,--I noticed a policeman sitting on a barrel in front of a
+grocery, smoking. He was a short, fat man, and his legs hardly reached
+to the pavement. I remember him the more particularly, because I stopped
+and lighted a cigar at his pipe. Just at that moment, the City Hall bell
+commenced striking a fire alarm."
+
+"What was the district?" asked the juror who was assistant foreman of
+the Bully Boy Hose.
+
+"The Seventh. I counted the strokes. I walked on rapidly, and soon came
+up with another policeman, who was leaning against a grocery store. I
+said to him, 'A cold night, Mr. Policeman,' and I think he would
+remember that circumstance, if he could be found. Just after I had
+passed him, the alarm bells struck the last round. Three or four rounds
+had been struck."
+
+The assistant foreman of the Bully Boy Hose, having referred to a
+memorandum book which he drew from a breast pocket, here exclaimed:
+
+"The alarm was at twenty-five minutes of twelve. Nothing but a chimney
+in Whitehall street. We run into Twenty's fellers, comin' back, and had
+a nice little row. Ever belong to the department, sir?"
+
+Marcus answered "No;" and the pyrophilist looked compassionately upon
+him, as upon one who had never known true happiness.
+
+"If you never run with the mersheen," observed the coroner, "you do'
+'no' wot life is. As for me, sir, it's my boast and pride that I have
+been a member of the New York Fire Department for more'n twenty years.
+It wos the backin' of the boys that made me a coroner; and, thank God!
+I'm never ashamed to tell 'em so."
+
+The coroner spoke truly. So far from being ashamed to "tell 'em so," he
+was always "telling 'em so," never missing an opportunity, at political
+meetings, to inform the firemen that he was "one of 'em," and that no
+mark of honor, even from the President of the United States, was equal
+to his fireman's badge. The continual "telling of 'em so" had aided in
+procuring for him his present official distinction, and was destined to
+earn higher honors for him at a future day.
+
+The coroner tore off a fresh chew from a half hand of Cavendish which
+had been well gnawed at all the edges, and told Marcus that he might
+"fire away" again.
+
+Marcus then proceeded to state that, on the morning after the eventful
+night, he woke up early. His dreams had been horrible, and his waking
+reflections were no less distressing. The thought that Mr. Minford
+should have suspected him, thus unjustly, of the basest of crimes, and
+that they, who had been such good friends, should have parted in a way
+that effectually cut off reconciliation; and the other thought, that
+this mischief had been wrought by some unscrupulous enemy, when he had
+always fondly believed that he never could have a foe in the
+world--these thoughts, occurring with great force to a nervous and
+sensitive man, nearly maddened him. He felt that if he remained in the
+house that day, as usual, and brooded over his troubles, he would grow
+crazy. While he was pondering what to do, his eyes chanced to fall on an
+invitation which he had received from Mr. Wesley Tiffles, to meet him at
+the Cortlandt street ferry at seven and a quarter o'clock that morning,
+and accompany him and his panorama of Africa to New Jersey. The day
+before, when this invitation came to hand, he had determined not to
+accept it; but it now seemed to offer him a capital chance to see some
+excitement and ran. As these remedies were precisely what his mental
+malady required, he jumped to dress himself, and hurried out of the
+house, seeing nobody as he made his exit, and leaving no word of
+explanation. He took no luggage, except a clean collar, as he intended
+to return the following day. He was even so careless and forgetful as to
+leave his purse behind him, and found, on reaching the ferry, that he
+had barely two dollars in his pocket.
+
+QUESTION BY A JUROR. "Wos they bank bills; and, if so, what bank wos
+they on?"
+
+Marcus answered the question to the best of his knowledge, and the juror
+sagely nodded, and took the reply under treatment.
+
+"I say, Tubbs," cried the coroner, "wot's the use of askin' them kind o'
+questions?"
+
+Tubbs looked up from his ruminations, somewhat confused. The politic
+Overtop--that model of a rising lawyer--here put in a word for Tubbs,
+and said that the question, in his opinion, was a very pertinent one,
+for it went to test the memory of his client. If Mr. Wilkeson had just
+committed murder, he would hardly be in that calm frame of mind which is
+necessary to the recollection of small facts. He hoped that the
+ingenious gentleman would ask many more such questions. By these
+judicious remarks, Overtop gained one fast friend for his client on
+the jury.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+JUSTICE GOES TO DINNER.
+
+Wesley Tiffles was then examined. He commenced with an eloquent
+dissertation on the rights of man, and his own rights in particular, but
+stopped when he saw that the reporters tucked their pencils behind their
+ears, and waited for facts. The moment he began to talk facts--which are
+to reporters what corn is to crows--down came the pencils from their
+perches again, and went tripping over the paper.
+
+Mr. Tiffles's testimony would have consumed two hours, or two days,
+perhaps, if he had been allowed to go on unchecked. But the coroner had
+been invited to dine at a Broadway restaurant, with a few political
+friends, at three P.M. So he concluded, after Tiffles had talked five
+minutes, that he knew nothing about the murder, and could throw no
+light on it, and told Tiffles that he was not wanted further.
+
+"And you mean to tell me, sir, that I am not to be locked up in the
+station house to-night," said Tiffles.
+
+"No, unless yer want ter be."
+
+"Of course not--of course not." But the interior Tiffles was
+disappointed at this sudden and unromantic termination of his case. A
+few more nights in the station house, or in the Tombs, would have given
+him capital material for a book, of which he had already projected the
+first chapter. He sat down, and execrated his ill luck.
+
+Patching, the artist, was then interrogated, to the extent of two
+minutes, and corroborated Tiffles's testimony as to the sad and strange
+appearance of Mr. Wilkeson on the day after the supposed murder.
+Patching was then informed by the coroner that his further attendance at
+the inquest would not be required.
+
+Patching, on rising, had assumed the attitude of Paul before Felix, as
+set forth in some ancient cartoon; and in that position of mingled
+innocence, dignity, and defiance, the artist of the illustrated paper
+got a spirited sketch of him. Had Patching dreamed how capitally his
+long hair, peaked beard, thin nose, and bony forehead would be taken
+off, in a rough but faithful character portrait, he would have sunk in
+confusion. Happily, the newspaper artist was sitting almost behind his
+more pretentious brother of the canvas, and the latter knew not what had
+been done, until, the following week, he saw a striking intensification
+of himself staring into the street from numerous bulletin boards and
+shop windows.
+
+Before sitting down, Mr. Patching begged to explain to the jury, and to
+the public through the reporters (who did not take down a word of the
+explanation), that he had painted the panorama of Africa to oblige his
+friend, "Wesley Tiffles. It was hardly necessary for him to say, in this
+community, that he was more at home among higher walks of Art.
+
+"Are you a sign painter, Mr. Patching?" asked the coroner. "No, sir; I
+am not," said Patching, with dignified contempt.
+
+"Perhaps you're a carriage painter, then? Them's the fellers for
+picturin'. The woman and flowers on the Bully Boys' hose carriage wos
+well done. Hey, Jack?"
+
+"That it wos, Harry," returned the assistant foreman of the Bully Boys.
+"If Patching can do that sort o' thing, he'll pass."
+
+Patching fixed looks of professional indignation on the coroner and the
+assistant foreman, and sat down gloomily, amid the suppressed laughter
+of the irreverent reporters.
+
+The coroner then looked at his watch, and, finding that the time was
+within half an hour of dinner, said that the inquest would be adjourned
+till the following morning, at ten o'clock.
+
+"But, your Honor," said Overtop, "--that is, if you will allow me to
+make the suggestion--couldn't you give us an hour longer? Nothing has
+yet been heard from Miss Minford, who, you said, was expected to be in
+attendance to-day. Will you be good enough to send to Mrs. Crull's
+house for her?"
+
+"Really, I can't wait," replied the coroner. "The young lady must be
+sick, or she would have been here before now."
+
+"But--pardon me, your Honor--we are anxious to have Miss Minford brought
+on the stand this afternoon, believing, that her testimony alone will
+acquit our client."
+
+"You believe so, because you do' 'no' what it is. But, as I said before,
+it wos on Miss Minford's statement that Mr. Wilkingson there was
+'rested. And the best advice I can give him is to take a good night's
+rest, and get his nerves ready for the young woman's testimony
+to-morrow, for it'll be a staggerer." The coroner consulted his watch
+again, with evident impatience, and rose from his seat.
+
+Overtop essayed to speak again; but the coroner interrupted him with,
+"The inquest is 'journed till to-morrer, at ten o'clock. Mr. Policeman,
+you will take the prisoner back to the station house."
+
+This speech was torture to Overtop and Maltboy, who, believing firmly
+in their friend's innocence, were convinced that a full investigation of
+the case that day would procure his acquittal. They turned eyes of
+exhaustless friendship and sympathy toward him.
+
+Marcus was in that half-comatose state which is the stupid reaction from
+an intense and painful excitation of the nerves. He was morbidly calm.
+The opinion of the coroner, that Miss Minford's testimony would be a
+"staggerer," had no more effect on him than it would have had on the
+most phlegmatic reader of the case in next morning's paper.
+
+"Then, your Honor, we must ask you to take bail," said Overtop.
+
+"Can't take bail! Can't take anything but my dinner, to-day! For the
+third time, I say, the inquest is adjourned." The coroner hastily put on
+his spring overcoat.
+
+Overtop was tempted to make a fierce reply; but the legal discretion in
+which he was educated restrained him.
+
+The word had gone forth. The jurors rose, yawned, and grasped their
+hats. The reporters jammed their notes into their pockets, and
+precipitately fled from the room. The policeman escorted Marcus Wilkeson
+and his counsel, and Tiffles and Patching, to the carriage which brought
+them, and which still stood in front of the house, an object of tragic
+interest to a large crowd of men, women, and children, who had remained
+about the doorway during the inquest, and could not be dispersed by the
+policemen.
+
+"Which is he?" "Who's the murderer?" whispered twenty voices, as the
+party emerged from the stairs upon the sidewalk.
+
+"That's him! That chap with the big hat and long hair. You could pick
+him out of a million," said a shrewd observer.
+
+"What ugly eyes he's got! They're sharp enough to stab ye," added a shop
+girl.
+
+"I seen some pirates hung, when I was a little gal," remarked an old
+woman, "and they were pooty compared to him."
+
+The object of these and other remarks was the unhappy Patching, who had
+not yet got over his wrath at the coroner, and was scowling and
+compressing his lips very like a murderer.
+
+The policeman and his companions, all but the spell-bound Marcus, could
+not help laughing at these ridiculous mistakes. But Patching turned upon
+the crowd, and delivered among them one withering look of scorn, which
+fully confirmed them in the belief that he was a murderer of the deepest
+dye. And when the carriage rolled away, it was followed by a volley of
+groans, mixed with a few pebbles, handfuls of mud, and other missiles
+which happened to be lying around loose.
+
+"Here, boys, don't act that way," said the coroner, who had just made
+his appearance on the sidewalk. "Let the poor devil go. It's a case of
+murder, clear, enough; and he won't slip through my hands easy, I can
+tell ye, if he _is_ rich." The coroner spoke good-naturedly, for he saw
+several of his political adherents among the throng.
+
+"That's the talk!" "Good boy!" "You're the feller for us!" were some of
+the warm responses.
+
+The coroner smiled, as he stopped to light a cigar from the pipe of a
+dirty admirer, and then, bowing obsequiously to the group, he stalked
+off in a rowdy way in the direction of his expected dinner.
+
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+LIGHT IN THE PRISON.
+
+On the return of the prisoner and friends to the station house, Marcus
+was gratified to find a number of old business acquaintances waiting for
+him in the ante-room. They were men whom he had known in his Wall-street
+epoch, and had always set down as good-enough friends in prosperity, but
+cold-shouldered creatures in an hour of trial. He was mistaken, as many
+men are mistaken, in judging the hearts of business men from their
+white and careworn faces. They came with warm hands, sympathetic words,
+and offers of bail money and other aid, if wanted. There were short
+notes from two or three other old fellows whom he had not seen for
+years, telling him that they were at his command.
+
+These expressions of good will touched Marcus to the heart. He learned
+that, in the self-conceit of his retired and studious life, he had done
+injustice to these citizens of the whirling world. With a thousand
+thanks for the kindness of his callers, he told them that their friendly
+services were not needed; that his innocence would surely be made to
+appear; and that, to the day of his death, he should never forget them.
+Upon this assurance, repeated two or three times, his business friends
+withdrew with characteristic business impetuosity, wishing him a speedy
+release from his disagreeable position--which is the roundabout phrase
+for prison.
+
+A policeman, who had charge of the station house during the absence of
+his superior officer, here informed Marcus that an old lady and a young
+one, an old gen'leman and a lad, had called. The old gen'leman and the
+lad would drop round again during the evening. The old lady and the
+young one were waiting for him in the captain's room.
+
+He entered the captain's room--his companions staying outside--and saw,
+as he expected, his half-sister Philomela, and a young woman dressed in
+the height of cheap fashion, who was no other than Mash, the cook.
+
+His sister rose, and extended her hand to him severely, and said, with a
+solemn voice:
+
+"Brother Marcus, I am sorry to see you here. I hope you are not guilty
+of this crime?"
+
+"Hope?" said Marcus, stung to the quick. "Why not say at once that I am
+guilty? It is strange that the only relative I have on earth should be
+the first to doubt my innocence."
+
+"Oh, no, Marcus! You do me injustice there. I do not for a moment doubt
+your innocence. But you know I always advised you to give up your
+moping habits at home, and go into active business, like other men of
+your age. If you had been in business now, you wouldn't have had time to
+get mixed up in the affairs of this old man Minford and his daughter,
+and would have escaped this disgrace. I trust, Marcus," she added,
+emphatically, "I trust this will be a lesson to you."
+
+Poor Mash, the cook, had been playing with her bonnet strings, and
+trying to check her tears. But the unnatural effort was too much for
+her, and she burst out crying.
+
+"Oh, Mr. Wilkeson!" she said, between her sobs, "I--I'm so sorry to see
+you here; b-but I--I know yer innocent. Boo-boo-hoo!"
+
+"Thank you, Mash," replied Marcus, quite affected at this sudden
+outbreak of sympathy. "_You_ speak like a true woman. But don't cry any
+more, my good girl. I shall be released to-morrow." Marcus said this
+confidently--though he had not the least idea how his acquittal was to
+be obtained.
+
+"Oh! I hope so--I--hope so, Mr. Wilkeson. Boo-boo-hoo--I--I wish I could
+g-go to prison in your place. Boo-boo-hoo!"
+
+Mash had derived this preposterous idea of vicarious imprisonment from
+the story of "The Buttery and the Boudoir," which was now drawing near
+its conclusion, and gradually killing, or marrying off, its heroes
+and heroines.
+
+Marcus could not help smiling at the romantic notion. Miss Philomela
+laughed sarcastically, and exclaimed:
+
+"You must take pattern from me, girl, and control your feelings. My
+brother doesn't want crying women about him at this time."
+
+"Don't be too sure of that, sister. Tears come naturally from a woman.
+They are her best evidence of sympathy, and therefore precious to one
+who needs it."
+
+Mash, the cook, gave vent to a fresh shower of tears at this encouraging
+remark, and made Miss Philomela shrug her shoulders in disgust.
+
+"Oh! _don't_ be silly. Mash!" said Miss Philomela, losing all patience
+with the cook.
+
+"I--I--boo-boo-hoo!--can't help it, marm."
+
+"Nonsense!" said the superior female. "As for you, Marcus, you should
+not encourage such folly, when you have troubles that demand our sober
+and earnest attention. With reference to the past, I might say a great
+many things, but I forbear. To be serious, now--for once in your
+life--what can I do for you?"
+
+"Will you do what I ask, faithfully?" asked Marcus.
+
+"Yes, faithfully. I promise."
+
+"Then, my sister, be so good as to go home immediately, and send me a
+spare shirt and a change of clothes. Mash can bring them. And, lest
+another interview should prove too severe a trial for your female
+sensibility, I beg that you will not come here again. If I want you very
+much, I can send for you."
+
+"You are very unkind--very unkind. But I will not make any remarks. You
+know that nothing would give me greater pleasure than to serve my
+brother. For, though you have faults--I suppose you will not deny that
+you have some little faults--you are still my brother."
+
+Marcus smiled, and thought how foolish it was to quarrel with the
+whimsical but not bad-hearted woman. "Well, sister Philomela, you can
+see for yourself that I am not ill used here. Comfortable bed, rousing
+fire, and warm meals from the restaurant round the corner! The
+lieutenant[1] who is in command of this station house turns out to be an
+old friend of my boyhood, and treats me more like a guest than a
+prisoner. And I must say, that, but for the idea of a prison, I could
+live as pleasantly here as at home. Even you can do nothing to lighten
+my captivity. But I promise, that _if_ I am held by this coroner's
+jury--which, of course, I shall not be--and am sent to the Tombs, then I
+will tax your sisterly affection to the utmost."
+
+[Footnote 1: Called sergeant of police under the recent Metropolitan
+Act.]
+
+At the mention of that dreadful place, the "Tombs," Mash broke into
+sobs again. The touching experiences of Gerald Florville in that house
+of despair--as set forth in "The Buttery and the Boudoir"--were
+poignantly brought to her mind.
+
+Miss Philomela looked serious as the Tombs loomed up in her mind, and
+she would have said something condoling, but for the irritating conduct
+of the cook, who annoyed her so much that she decided to leave. She
+abruptly shook hands with her half-brother. "It is very easy," said she,
+"to point out how certain mistakes might have been avoided. But let the
+past go. If you are not acquitted to-morrow, I shall call here again,
+notwithstanding you don't seem very desirous to see me. Now, good-by.
+Come, hurry up, Mash!"
+
+Marcus shook hands with his half-sister, and also with Mash, who wept
+afresh.
+
+In the ante-room, Miss Philomela saw Overtop and Maltboy, upon whom she
+bestowed a half smile, and Tiffles, whom she treated to a cordial
+grimace, not unmingled with a blush. Tiffles, on his part, was
+profoundly polite, and inquired if she were going home. Learning that
+she was, he remarked that he had occasion to walk in the same direction,
+and accompanied her as she left the station house. Mash followed at a
+short distance behind, not because she did not think herself fully as
+good as Miss Philomela, but because she wished to indulge unchecked in
+the mild luxury of tears.
+
+A new visitor was now announced. He was a curly-headed, neatly dressed
+boy of nineteen years. His face was one that is handsomer in promise
+than in fact. Marcus recognized him as the boy Bog, whom he had not seen
+for several weeks. The boy had developed a remarkable talent for making
+money honestly. For two months he had attended a night school, and was
+fast correcting his awkward English, and attaining to other knowledge.
+Prosperity and schooling together had given him quite a polish. The
+rough boy was coming to be a presentable youth.
+
+He advanced timidly toward Marcus, who shook hands with him. He sat down
+before the fire, and commenced fumbling his cap in the old way. "With
+the exception of that trick, and his shyness, there was little of the
+original boy Bog about him,
+
+"Mr. Wilkeson," said he, giving his cap a twirl, "I am very sorry to see
+you here; because, I may say, I _know_ you are innocent."
+
+The positive manner in which the boy asserted this, charmed Marcus, "I
+thank you, my dear Bog," said he; "but how do you know it? For, though I
+am innocent, I may have some trouble in proving it."
+
+The boy drew a small folded note from his pocket. "I'll explain, sir,"
+said he.
+
+Marcus here called in his counsel, Messrs. Overtop and Maltboy, and his
+good friend the lieutenant of police, who had just arrived in the outer
+room, in order that they might hear the explanation.
+
+The boy was embarrassed by his audience; but the anxious look of Marcus,
+and a few kind words from the lieutenant of police, reassured him. Bog
+then proceeded to tell what he knew of the strange young man's
+acquaintance with Miss Patty Minford--which was very easily told, since
+it did not amount to much--and concluded by opening the letter given to
+him by the young man for delivery to Miss Minford, and handed it
+to Marcus.
+
+Marcus glanced at the writing, expecting that it would resemble that of
+the first anonymous letter addressed to Mr. Minford, which he drew from
+his pocket for comparison. But the writing was totally different in
+inclination, thickness of the downward stroke, and all other respects.
+He read it aloud, his counsel and the lieutenant of police listening
+attentively.
+
+"I don't know much about the case yet," said the lieutenant, "but,
+jumping at a conclusion, I should say that this sneaking chap was
+jealous of your intimacy with the Minford family; that he wrote the
+anonymous letters to the old man, in a different hand, and that he
+either committed the murder, or knows something about it. His motive for
+annoying Miss Minford I can understand--for this city is full of just
+such well dressed scoundrels; but the motive of the murder I can't
+comprehend. But mark me--- this fellow has some knowledge of it; and we
+must hunt him up. And, first, let us compare the letters."
+
+Marcus handed the two letters to the lieutenant, who, with Overtop and
+Maltboy, gave them a close examination. One was written on faint blue
+paper in a buff envelope; the other on white paper in a white envelope.
+Every curve, cross, and dot was minutely compared; but not the faintest
+resemblance between the two letters could be discovered. "No more like
+than chalk and cheese," said the lieutenant. "My theory is knocked on
+the head."
+
+"Let me examine the envelopes again," said Overtop. They had inspected
+them less carefully than the contents.
+
+As soon as Overtop had placed the two envelopes side by side, his eyes
+lighted up with the pleasure of a great discovery. "What fools we are!"
+he exclaimed. "There it is! Don't you see? Don't you see? A regular
+Hogarthian line of beauty under the name on each."
+
+All stared at the envelopes, and at once recognized the similarity
+between the graceful curved lines. They looked somewhat like the letter
+S laid on its side; and more like the arm of a rocking chair.
+
+Marcus had a sudden inward vision of the writer. One of those
+convictions which defy all logical analysis flashed upon his mind.
+
+"Do you know where this strange young man lives, Bog?" asked Marcus.
+
+"No, sir. I follered--I should say followed--him two or three times,
+because I thought he wasn't acting just right toward Miss Minford (here
+Bog blushed). He always went into drinking houses and billiard saloons,
+and once into a place where they say the worst kind o' gambling is
+allers--I mean always--going on. But he knew me by sight, and I was
+afraid he would ask me about that letter which I didn't deliver for
+him. So I had to follow him a good piece behind; and sometimes I lost
+track of him. Then, again, he would keep a tramping round from one
+drinking place to another--but never getting drunk that I could
+see--till twelve or one o'clock at night. By that time I felt I ought to
+go home, and so I never tracked him to his lodgings, if he has any. But
+it's my belief he travels in the night, and sleeps in the daytime, like
+the cats."
+
+"Good, so far," said Marcus. "You have already given us a general
+description of this fellow's dress and appearance. Now, tell me whether
+his face is pale, his mustache small and curved up in points, his eyes
+light gray, and never looking straight at you; his nose small, thin, and
+sharp; and, now I think of it, has he not got a small scar on one of
+his cheeks?"
+
+"Why, Mr. Wilkeson," exclaimed the boy Bog, "that's the very chap!"
+
+"Who is he?" asked the lieutenant of police, "that I may have him
+arrested at once."
+
+"He is the son--"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+THE SORROW OF WHITE HAIRS.
+
+At that moment the door opened, and the venerable form of Myndert Van
+Quintem appeared before them. Marcus cast a hasty glance, importing
+silence, at his companions, and rose to receive his old friend.
+
+Mr. Van Quintem's face expressed the tenderest compassion. He clasped
+Marcus's hand, and said:
+
+"My young friend, it deeply grieves me to see you here; for I feel--I
+may say I know morally--that you are innocent of any part in
+this murder."
+
+"Thank you for your confidence," said Marcus. "I hope, when Miss Minford
+and certain other witnesses are examined to-morrow, to prove my
+innocence conclusively."
+
+"So you will, I am sure. When I say that I know you are innocent, I
+found my belief on my short but pleasant acquaintance with you. But I
+cannot guess, from the evidence at the inquest yesterday and that of
+to-day--just published in the afternoon papers,--who committed the
+murder, or what was the motive of it. Have you any clue to the mystery?"
+
+"Yes--yes," replied Marcus. "We think we have a clue; but so slight,
+that it is hardly worth mentioning. My friends here are going to
+follow it up."
+
+"And in order that we may do so without any delay," said the lieutenant,
+"please give us the name of that sneaking letter writer."
+
+Marcus coughed, looked at the lieutenant knowingly, and said, "Oh,
+_that's_ no consequence. It's a false scent. Depend on it."
+
+The old gentleman, as he entered the room, had caught Marcus Wilkeson's
+words. "He is the son--" and had observed the slight confusion with
+which Marcus had stopped saying something. He now noticed the glance
+enjoining silence, which Marcus had directed at the lieutenant
+of police.
+
+Mr. Van Quintem turned pale, as a harrowing suspicion came into his
+mind. "Mr. Wilkeson," he said, in a trembling voice, "will you answer me
+one question truly?"
+
+"I--I will," replied Marcus.
+
+"Then tell me, in Heaven's name, do you know of anything that connects
+my son with this monstrous crime? I have had a dreadful presentiment,
+all along, that he had something to do with it. The end of his wrong
+career will be the gallows. I have dreamt of it for years. O God! that I
+should have begotten such a profligate and miscreant into the world!"
+
+The old man made another pause, and then said, with a calmness that
+surprised his hearers. "Now I am ready to hear all."
+
+"And you shall," said Marcus, "though it pains me, my dear friend, to
+tell you what we know of your son. I will say, however, that there is
+no proof directly connecting him with the murder."
+
+"He is cunning and covers his tracks," said the wretched parent. "I know
+him well."
+
+Marcus then exhibited the letters. Mr. Van Quintem compared them
+carefully, but could not detect the least trace of resemblance. But, on
+examining the envelopes, at the suggestion of Fayette Overtop, he at
+once recognized the Hogarthian curve as a mark which he had always
+observed on his son's letters.
+
+"I could almost swear to this mark; and yet it is possible that he did
+not write the letters. Bad as he is, I will wait for further proofs.
+Please tell me all else that you know, Mr. Wilkeson."
+
+"With regard to the letter written to Miss Minford," said Marcus, "there
+is, unhappily, but little doubt; as this lad, who was well acquainted
+with the Minford family, can inform you."
+
+The boy Bog, very reluctantly, and with many awkward breaks, and
+swingings of his cap, repeated the history of the first letter, and
+described the young man's person most minutely, and told how he had
+followed him in his wild rambles about the town.
+
+The old man listened sadly and quietly; only now and then interrupting
+the boy's narrative with questions that were seemingly as calm as a
+judge's interrogatories.
+
+"He is a murderer. Something in the air tells me that he is," murmured
+the old man. "And he is my son."
+
+The inexpressible heart-broken sadness, with which he uttered these
+words, brought tears to the eyes of his hearers.
+
+"It may be, my dear Mr. Van Quintem, that your son did not write the
+anonymous letters to Mr. Minford, notwithstanding the point of
+resemblance which we think we have detected. While sitting, at my
+window, I have often noticed him in his room scribbling at a desk, as if
+he were practising penmanship. Perhaps, if you examine the contents of
+the desk, you may get some further light on the subject. It is
+wonderful--most people would say impossible--that a man should write
+two letters so entirely dissimilar as these."
+
+"My son always excelled in writing. It was one of the branches that he
+took prizes in at school. I will examine the desk; but I fear I shall
+only confirm my strong suspicions that he is a murderer. O God! O God!
+Why did he not die with his sainted mother! Far better would that have
+been. It is a hard thing, gentlemen--it is a very hard thing; but if
+this boy of mine does not surrender himself to the hands of justice
+to-morrow, I shall--I shall--myself denounce him to the--"
+
+The afflicted man, overcome with the terrible conflict between a sense
+of public duty, and a lingering, inextinguishable parental affection,
+fainted and fell into the arms of Marcus, who sprang to catch him.
+
+While he was still insensible, the lieutenant of police, and the boy
+Bog, slipped out of the room, and started off on a search for Myndert
+Van Quintem, jr.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+WHAT PAPER, TYPES, AND INK CAN DO.
+
+When Marcus and his counsel, accompanied by the faithful lieutenant of
+police, arrived in a close carriage at the scene of the inquest, at the
+hour of adjournment next morning, they saw a convincing illustration of
+the power of paper, types, and ink.
+
+The morning journals, with whole leaded pages of evidence, and new
+diagrams of the house and fatal room; and the enterprising illustrated
+weekly, with portraits of the deceased, the prisoner, his counsel,
+Tiffles, Patching (great hat and all), Patty Minford, the coroner, the
+foreman of the jury, a full-page design of the murder, as it was
+supposed to have taken place, representing the infuriate Wilkeson, club
+in hand, standing over the prostrate body of the inventor, from whose
+forehead the gore was pouring in torrents--all these delightful,
+provocatives of sensation had done their full and perfect work.
+
+At that moment, Marcus Wilkeson was known to the world of readers in New
+York and the whole country round about, as the murderer of
+Eliphalet Minford.
+
+On the second morning of the inquest an immense crowd of people were
+assembled in front of the house. They had been collecting since five
+A.M., when a party of six Jerseymen, having sold off their stock of
+nocturnal cabbages at Washington Market, had taken position of vantage
+before the house, from which they and their wagons were afterward
+dislodged with great effort by a squad of police. Some butcher boys,
+also returning from their night's work at market, were next on the
+ground, and selected adjacent awning posts and trees, as good points of
+observation. Mechanics and shop girls, going to their labor, recklessly
+postponed the duties of the day, and stopped to stare, awestricken, at
+the house.
+
+A knot of people in a street, is like a drift of wood in a river. It
+chokes up the stream, and catches all the other wood that is
+floating down.
+
+The police had in vain tried to clear out this human throng. They had
+waged the following contests with their fellow citizens, since six
+o'clock A.M.:--first, they had driven the Jersey market wagons to the
+street corner below; second, they had tumbled the butcher boys out of
+the trees, where they hung like a strange species of fruit; third, they
+had cleared a space of ten feet square in front of the house. Having
+done thus much, the police paused from exhaustion, and endured the jokes
+of the populace with philosophic disdain.
+
+Three policemen guarded the door, within which no one was admitted but
+the coroner, the jury, witnesses, a few political friends of the
+coroner, who exhibited passes from him, and about twenty-five reporters,
+fifteen of whom really belonged to newspapers, and the remainder had a
+general connection with the press, which could never be clearly defined
+and established. To the magic word "reporter," accompanied by the
+flourish of a pencil and a roll of paper, the three policemen smiled
+obsequiously, and unbarred the way. Seeing how well this plan worked,
+two gentlemen of inelegant leisure, and at least one pickpocket,
+provided themselves with rolls of paper and pencils, and, giving the
+password, were admitted.
+
+As the carriage rolled round the corner of the street, bringing Marcus
+in full view of these acres of men, women, and children--all waiting for
+him--the little courage which he had plucked up failed him, as
+plucked-up courage generally does. The sound of mingled laughter, jokes,
+oaths, and exclamations of impatience reached his ears.
+
+"Great heavens!" he cried; "and I am to face all these people!" If his
+features could have been seen, at that instant, by some person who
+thought himself skilled in physiognomy, he would have been
+unhesitatingly pronounced guilty of several murders. Marcus sat in the
+rear part of the coach, and he leaned back to avoid observation.
+
+As the carriage entered the outskirts of the throng, they became aware
+that it contained the man of their desires. Five small boys, who had run
+all the way from the station house, had brought the exciting
+intelligence. The vehicle was at once surrounded by clamorous people.
+
+"Say, Mister, wich is the murderer, hey?" asked a red-shirted fellow of
+Matthew Maltboy, whose corpulent figure squeezed the thin form of
+Fayette Overtop into a corner of the front seat.
+
+Maltboy was not quick at thinking; but, on this occasion, a brave
+thought came into his head before he could turn to the speaker. "I am
+the prisoner," said he.
+
+"I knowed you wos," was the red-shirted reply, "by your--ugly face."
+
+"Thank you," said Matthew, meekly.
+
+"That's the chap that killed the old man--him with the big chops," said
+the red-shirted individual to his numerous red and other shirted
+friends about.
+
+"What! that fat cuss with the pig eyes?"
+
+"Zackly!"
+
+"He's the puffick image of his portrait in the--Weekly, isn't he?"
+
+"Like as two peas."
+
+There was truth in this; for the artist who sketched the portraits, had
+inadvertently placed Marcus's name under Matthew's portrait, and
+_vice versa_.
+
+"Well," said another man, an expert in human nature, "I'd convict that
+fellow of murder any time, on the strength of his looks. Never were the
+worst passions of our nature more prominently shown than in that bad
+face." Having said which, the speaker looked about for somebody to
+contradict him, and was disappointed in finding no one.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson said: "Here, Matt, none of that generous nonsense, if
+you please. I am the prisoner, my good people." As Marcus spoke, he
+stretched forward, and exhibited his face to the gaze of the red-shirted
+querist and his companions.
+
+"No, you don't!" said that fiery leader. "This blubbery chap is the one.
+We knows him by his picter."
+
+"No use disputing them, Mark," said Maltboy, with his indomitable smile.
+
+The friendly struggle was soon terminated by their arrival at the house.
+Here the human jam was tremendous; but the police, under the direction
+of the lieutenant, succeeded in getting their convoy safe within the
+entry. The door was then closed, and five sturdy policemen stood outside
+to guard it.
+
+On entering the room, everybody and everything were found just as they
+had been the day before--a day that seemed to Marcus a month ago. The
+jury were idling over the newspapers, or lazily turning their quids. The
+coroner, who looked a little the worse for his dinner of the day before,
+was bandying jokes with the facetious reporters. The other reporters
+were sharpening their pencils and laying out their note books. Some--the
+younger ones--were listening with a species of reverence, which they
+would soon outgrow, to the official jesting of the coroner. Others were
+squabbling over the right and title to certain chairs which possessed
+the extraordinary advantage of being a foot or two nearer the coroner
+than the other chairs. This is a grave cause of dispute among the
+reporters, and has been known to give rise to a great many hard words,
+and threats of subsequent chastisements, which are always indefinitely
+postponed.
+
+The coroner nodded, and said "good morning" to the comers, and assumed a
+temporary official dignity, by taking down his right leg from the arm of
+the chair over which it gracefully depended. He also fortified himself,
+by thrusting a sizable chew into a corner of his mouth, as if he were
+carefully loading a pistol.
+
+But neither the coroner, nor the jury, nor the reporters, nor the few
+private citizens who had obtained entrance by special dispensation, and
+sat gaping about the room, attracted the attention of the prisoner.
+Before him was one in whose presence all other persons faded into
+nothingness--the fair disturber of his peaceful life--the arbitress of
+his fate--Patty Minford.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+PET AS A WITNESS.
+
+Little Pet sat on the low stool which she had always occupied, and which
+Marcus, in his strange sentimentality, had always considered sacred to
+her. She was veiled; but, through the thick gauze, he could see that her
+beautiful face was deathly pale. Her slender frame shook with little
+convulsions, that made the chair rattle.
+
+"Be calm, my dear child," said a stout, self-possessed woman who sat by
+her side, and held a bottle of salts conspicuously in her hand.
+"Remember, you have only to tell the trewth, and let the consekences
+fall where they may. Tell the trewth, as the old sayin' is, and shame
+the de--you know who."
+
+Mrs. Crull--for she it was--checked herself with a neat cough. Her
+three months' private education seemed to have been lost upon her. She
+could never speak correctly out of Miss Pillbody's sight. Fortunately,
+her heart needed no education. She had taken the poor orphan girl to her
+home, and been a mother to her. In that phrase there is an horizonless
+world of love.
+
+The deep, manly voice of Mrs. Crull carried assurance to the sinking
+heart of Patty. She took the extended hand, and pressed it, deriving
+strength from the contact of that strong, positive nature.
+
+"If you please, Mr. Cronner," said Mrs. Crull, "I think you'd better go
+ahead with her examination at once. Quickest said, soonest mended,
+you know."
+
+The prisoner and his counsel having taken their seats, the coroner
+having involuntarily thrown his right leg into the old, easy position,
+the jury having pricked up their ears, the reporters having cleared
+spaces for their elbows, the young girl proceeded to give her testimony.
+She was too nervous to make a clear, connected statement. Sometimes
+terror, sometimes tears, would choke her voice; but the cheering words
+and the smelling bottle of Mrs. Crull invariably "brought her round in
+no time," in the words of that estimable lady.
+
+Pet told the story of her return home on the fatal night, of her finding
+Mr. Wilkeson and her father in angry conversation; of her retiring to
+bed very much fatigued; of more conversation, growing angrier and
+angrier, which she overheard; of her marvellous vision in the night; of
+her waking next morning to find her vision true, and her father dead on
+the floor. All these facts, with which the reader is already familiar,
+the poor child made known to the jury in a fragmentary, roundabout way,
+as they were elicited by questions from the coroner, the jury, and
+occasionally the prisoner's counsel. The narrative of the vivid dream,
+or vision, produced a startling effect on the coroner, who was a firm
+believer in every species of supernaturalism winch is most at variance
+with human experience and reason.
+
+In his interrogatories to the witness, the coroner took the truth of the
+vision for granted. When she testified to the blows which (in her
+dream) she saw her father and the prisoner exchange, and the battered
+appearance of Mr. Wilkeson's face, the coroner looked at the prisoner,
+and was evidently disappointed to observe no traces of a bruise upon his
+pale brow or cheeks, nor the lightest discoloration about his eyes. But
+the absence of this corroboration did not, in the coroner's opinion,
+throw the least discredit on the dream.
+
+But the foreman of the jury, who had been listening with an affrighted
+look to the marvellous story, and believing it, had his faith sadly
+shaken by this discrepancy. Having been fireman ten years, and foreman
+of a hose company six years, he knew by large experience how long it
+took to tone down a black eye or reduce a puffed cheek. The foreman
+looked at the smooth, clear face of the prisoner, smiled incredulously,
+and shook his head at his associates.
+
+Fayette Overtop here acted his part with a skill worthy of a veteran.
+Instead of making a great ado over this weak point of the dream, he
+shrugged his shoulders, and smiled faintly at the jury. The jurors, who
+had been inclined, up to this time, to accept the dream as evidence,
+without question, now decided that it was nonsense.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson sat and listened, as if the scene and all the actors in
+it, himself included, were only a dream too. The young girl's evidence,
+of which he had not an inkling before, would have astounded him, if
+anything could. But he had reached that point of reaction in the
+emotions, where a stolid and complete apathy happily takes the place of
+high nervous excitement. He somehow felt certain of his acquittal, but
+was strangely benumbed to his fate.
+
+He looked at the witness--the holy idol of all his romantic and tender
+thoughts in days gone by--with unruffled composure. The marked stoicism
+of his demeanor was not lost on the reporters, and they noticed it in
+paragraphs to the effect that the prisoner exhibited a hardened
+indifference during the most thrilling portion of the evidence.
+
+QUESTION BY THE CORONER (_after thinking it over a bit_). "Who do you
+say struck the fust blow, miss? Remember, now, you're on oath."
+
+ANSWER. "My father, sir--or rather, I dreamed so."
+
+The coroner was disappointed again, for he hoped that the witness would,
+on second thought, fix the commencement of the actual assault on the
+prisoner. "Your father, being old and kind o' feeble, struck a light
+blow, I s'pose."
+
+WITNESS. "No, sir--a heavy one, I should judge; for it appeared to cut
+open Mr. Wilkeson's lip, and bruise his cheek. The blood seemed to run
+down his face in a stream." Here little Pet exhibited signs of
+faintness, which good Mrs. Crull stopped by an instant application of
+the smelling bottle.
+
+CORONER. "Mr. Wilkeson struck back a terrible blow in return, I s'pose."
+
+WITNESS. "Yes, sir. He hit my father right in the eye, raising a black
+and blue spot as large as a hen's egg." The painful recollection of this
+part of the dream so overpowered the witness, that she burst into tears,
+but was soon quieted by the motherly attentions of Mrs. Crull.
+
+FOREMAN OF THE JURY. "I don't want to hurt the young lady's feelin's,
+but this 'ere dream is all nonsense; and it strikes me we're a lot o'
+fools to be listenin' to it. Why, Harry, you know, as well as I do, that
+there wasn't no bruise on the old man's face, exceptin' the big one on
+his forehead. No more is there a sign of a scratch on the prisoner's mug
+there. It's all gammon."
+
+Three others of the jury nodded in approval of this sentiment. The
+remaining two shared somewhat in the coroner's reverence for dreams, and
+awaited further developments.
+
+The coroner turned his quid uneasily. "You can think as you please,
+Jack," said he: "but we'll see--we'll see." The coroner, like many
+other men of greater claims to wisdom, used this enigmatical expression
+when he could not see anything.
+
+A lawyer less crafty than Fayette Overtop would have protested against
+the reception of this singular testimony at the outset, and at intervals
+of a minute during its delivery. But he foresaw that, being a dream, it
+must be full of absurdities, which would surely betray themselves, and
+help his client. Besides, he was curious to hear all of the evidence,
+however ridiculous and worthless, against the prisoner.
+
+The witness then proceeded to the close of her testimony, amid the
+silence of all hearers. The narrative of the dreadful grapple, the
+struggle for the club, and the death blow given by Mr. Wilkeson to her
+prostrate father--all delivered with an intense earnestness, broken only
+by occasional sobs and pauses of anguish--produced a powerful
+impression. As she finished, and fell, half fainting, into the arms of
+Mrs. Crull, the coroner nodded his head slowly, and said:
+
+"What do you think of dreams now, Jack? Something in 'em, eh?"
+
+The foreman shared in the general feeling of awe; but he had given his
+opinion that the dream was nonsense, and stood by it. "It's strange,"
+said he. "It's what the newspapers call a 'strordinary quincidence,'
+that the young lady should 'a' dreamed out this murder so plain. I do'
+'no' much about the science o' dreams, but I think this one might be
+explained somethin' in this way: The young lady heerd the old man and
+Mr. Wilkeson here talkin' strong, when she come home that night. She
+went to sleep with their conversation ringin' in her ears. Part on it
+she heerd in her dreams, and the rest she 'magined. She says she was
+afraid there would be trouble between 'em when she went to bed. The
+fight, and the murder, and all that, which she says she saw in a dream,
+or vision like, might have grown out o' that naterally enough. That's my
+notion of it, off hand. I've often gone to bed, myself, thinkin' of
+somethin' horrible that was goin' to happen, and dreamt that it did
+happen."
+
+[Illustration: THE INQUEST. MARCUS SPRINGS TO HIS FEET.]
+
+This was precisely the theory upon which Fayette Overtop intended to
+explain the dream to the jury when the proper time arrived. He was glad
+that the foreman had done it instead; for he knew the tenacity with
+which a man, having given an opinion, defends it. To have so potent an
+advocate of his client's innocence on the jury, was a strong point.
+
+"Very good, old boy," said the coroner; "but, if the prisoner didn't
+commit the murder, who did?"
+
+This question, so manifestly unjust, and betraying the coroner's
+intention to sacrifice Marcus to a theory, roused that unfortunate man
+to consciousness, and he sprang to his feet. But the wiser Overtop
+placed his hands upon his friend's shoulder, whispered in his ear, and
+forced him reluctantly into his seat. Overtop knew that the
+argumentative foreman could best dispose of the coroner.
+
+The foreman replied to the coroner's question:
+
+"As to who did the murder, that's what we're here to find out. But, for
+one, I sha'n't bring in no man guilty till it's proved onto him."
+
+The foreman's face was a dull one, but it became suddenly luminous with
+an idea:
+
+"You say, miss, that you was waked by a noise as of somethin' heavy
+fallin' on the floor?"
+
+"Yes, sir."
+
+"You s'pose--as we all s'pose--that it was your father's body that fell,
+when he received his death blow?"
+
+"Yes, sir."
+
+"You say you heerd no one a-goin' out o' the room?"
+
+"No, sir."
+
+"That's not strange; for the murd'rer could 'a' slipped off his boots or
+shoes, and walked out puffickly quiet. I noticed, this mornin', and the
+other members of the jury can see for themselves, that the boards of the
+floor don't creak when you walk on 'em, nor the entry door neither when
+you open it. Didn't you never observe that succumstance?"
+
+"Yes, sir; but it did not occur to me when I woke up. I thought, if the
+dream had been true, that I should have heard Mr. Wilkeson moving around
+in the room, or going out of the door. I listened for a long time, as I
+have already said, and, hearing nobody, I thought the dream was nothing
+but a nightmare, as father used to call it."
+
+"One more question, miss, which may or may not be of some consekence.
+Haven't you no idee about what time it was when you was waked up by this
+noise of somethin' fallin'?"
+
+"No, sir; not the least. It might have been about midnight, I should
+guess."
+
+"Think a minute, miss, if you didn't hear any sound outside that could
+give you some idee of the time." The foreman fixed his eyes piercingly
+on the witness.
+
+She reflected a moment. "Yes--yes; I do remember, that when I jumped out
+of bed--which I did the very second that I woke up--and listened at the
+door, I heard the fire bells striking. Now, if anybody could tell what
+time that happened."
+
+"At precisely twenty-five minutes of twelve," said the foreman, in a
+solemn voice. "It was for the seventh district--the only 'larm that
+night. It was a false 'larm, and only three or four rounds was sounded.
+Did you hear the bell many times?"
+
+"Only two or three, and then it stopped. The sound was very plain, sir,
+because the bell tower is only a short distance from here, you know."
+
+"Exactly," said the foreman. "You woke up just as Uncle Ith was givin'
+off the last round."
+
+There was a deep, awestruck silence in the room; for all understood the
+object of these inquiries.
+
+"Now, gentlemen," continued the foreman, in a trembling voice, "let the
+prisoner only prove that he was a half, or a quarter, or an eighth of a
+mile from here when that 'larm was sounded, and I rather think he will
+clear himself. Where are the policemen that the prisoner saw
+that night?"
+
+A noise, as of heavy official boots, was heard on the stairs, sending a
+strange thrill through the hearts of all present.
+
+"God be praised," said Fayette Overtop, "if the lieutenant has found
+them." It was the first time that the model young lawyer had shown any
+signs of emotion.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII.
+
+THE BENEFICENCE OF FIRE BELLS.
+
+The door opened, and the tall form of the police lieutenant appeared,
+attended by two patrolmen. The patrolmen, on entering, looked directly
+at the prisoner, and seemed to recognize him. The police lieutenant
+appeared to be pleased with his success in finding the witnesses, after
+a hunt through several station houses; but he was not aware what
+importance the testimony which they could give had suddenly acquired.
+The witnesses had been searched for at the suggestion of Fayette
+Overtop, with the vague hope of making them useful in some way.
+
+The coroner scowled at the witnesses, for he feared that they would
+prove the man innocent, who, in his opinion, was the murderer. Having
+adopted this theory at the outset, and staked the whole issue upon it,
+he felt a natural reluctance to give it up.
+
+The lieutenant explained to the coroner that the two officers could
+probably throw some light on the prisoner's movements, the night of
+the murder.
+
+The coroner administered the oath to both of them, as follows:
+
+"Holeup your ri't'an'. You swear to tell truth, th'ole truth, nothin'
+but truth, s'elpyeGod. Kiss the book."
+
+The men complied with these impressive formalities, and the coroner then
+proceeded to interrogate one of them--a strapping fellow with an
+intensely Irish face.
+
+"Name?" said the coroner.
+
+"Patrick O'Dougherty, yer Honor."
+
+The phrase "Yer Honor" produced its customary gracious effect.
+
+"Do you spell O'Dougherty with a 'k,'?" asked the coroner.
+
+"Hang me if I knows!" said the O'Dougherty. "I niver spilt it. Spill it
+to suit yezself, yer Honor."
+
+"Spell it in the usual way, with a 'k'" said the coroner, turning to the
+reporters.
+
+"Your residence, Mr. O'Dougherty?"
+
+"Me what?"
+
+"Your residence. Where do you live?"
+
+"Oh! it's fare I live yer want to know. In Mulberry street, near
+Baxter."
+
+"You belong to the perlice, I believe?" asked the coroner.
+
+"It's quare ye should ax me that!" replied the O'Dougherty, with an
+enormous smile.
+
+"Because you have the perliceman's hat, club, and badge? You forget,"
+said the coroner, patronizingly, "that courts of justice doesn't know
+nothin' until it's proved to them. As a coroner, I shouldn't know my own
+grandmother, until she swore to herself."
+
+"'Tisn't that, yer Honor; but becos yer got me onto the perlice yerself.
+Don't yer 'member, on 'lection day, I smashed two ticket booths of
+t'other can'date, in the Sixth Ward, lickt as much as a dozen men who
+was workin' agen ye, an' din was put into the Tumes over night--bad luck
+to the Tumes, I say! Well, yer Honor, ye was 'lected coroner by a small
+vote; an', in turn for me services, ye got me 'p'inted--"
+
+"Ah! oh! I remember, now," said the coroner, somewhat confused. "I did
+not know you in the perliceman's dress. Well, Mr. O'Dougherty, did you
+see the prisoner on the night of the murder?"
+
+"I did, yer Honor. It was about twelve o'clock. I was sittin' on a
+bar'l in front of Pat McKibbin's store, corner of Washin'ton
+and ---- streets. I was watchin' the bar'l, yer Honor, becos Pat
+McKibbin had some of 'em stole lately, ye see."
+
+"Could yer swear to him, Mr. O'Dougherty?"
+
+"Could I shwear to me own mother?--Hivin rest her sowl! Bedad, I shud
+know him a thousan' years from now. Didn't he shtop and light his siggar
+at me poipe? And didn't his nose touch me own?"
+
+"Did he look pale and excited?" asked the coroner.
+
+"No, yer Honor; his face was red as a brick, an', though it was a cowld
+night, he looked to be warm wid fasht walkin'."
+
+"Did he say anythin'?"
+
+"No; he only axed for a light."
+
+"Was his 'pearance 'spicious?"
+
+"No, yer Honor, more'n yer own. No offince to yez."
+
+"That'll do, Mr. O'Dougherty. Next witness."
+
+"If you please, your Honor," said the smooth Overtop, rising, "you have
+accidentally omitted to ask one very important question. The prisoner
+stated, on his preliminary examination, you remember, that, when he
+stopped to light a cigar from the pipe of a policeman, he heard the
+sound of a fire bell commencing to strike. Miss Minford testifies, that
+when she was roused from sleep by the noise of her father falling to the
+floor, she heard the alarm for the Seventh District. McKibbin's store,
+at the corner of Washington and ---- streets, is more than half a mile
+from here. In view of these facts, I will, with your Honor's permission,
+ask Mr. O'Dougherty if he heard the fire alarm that night; and, if so,
+whether the prisoner was in sight at the time?"
+
+"Shure, an' I heerd it," answered the O'Dougherty. "It was fur the
+Seventh District. An' wasn't this gin'leman here at the ind o' me poipe,
+jist when it begun to bang away?"
+
+Overtop cast one triumphant glance at the jury, which was fully
+reciprocated by the foreman and four others.
+
+"I have no more questions to ask, your Honor," said Overtop.
+
+"Nor I," said the coroner, "as the witness's testimony has no great
+bearin' on the case, that I can see. What is jour name, Mister--er--"
+
+"Thomas Jelliman," responded the second policeman, a stout, bluff,
+honest-looking fellow. He did not say "Your Honor," and thereby offended
+the coroner.
+
+"Well, what's yer bizness, anyhow?" asked the coroner, curtly.
+
+"I should think you would remember that I was a policeman," said the
+witness, looking the coroner straight in the eye.
+
+The coroner, taking a second observation of the witness, recalled him as
+the identical officer who had arrested him, one Christmas night, for
+drunkenness, and locked him up in the station house. This little
+occurrence was before his election to the dignified and responsible
+office of County Coroner.
+
+"If you don't remember me," said the witness, "I think I could bring
+myself to your mind easy. On a certain Christmas night, not many
+years ago--"
+
+"Never mind the particulars, Mr. Jelliman," observed the coroner. "Come
+to look at yer, I recolleck yer very well. Ahem! What do you know about
+this 'ere case, Mr. Jelliman?"
+
+"Nothing, sir, except that I can swear to having seen the prisoner, on
+the night of the murder, at the corner of West and ---- streets. He was
+smoking a cigar, and walking fast. As he passed me, he said, 'A cold
+night, Mr. Policeman.' This made me notice him particularly, because it
+isn't very often that people throw away civilities on us. Just as he
+turned the corner below me, the alarm bells struck the last round for
+the Seventh District. They had struck three or four rounds. That is all
+I know about the affair."
+
+"I have no other questions to ask, Mr. Jelliman," said the coroner, with
+great politeness.
+
+The coroner was baffled. He had staked the whole case upon the theory of
+Marcus Wilkeson's guilt, and had made no attempt to procure other
+testimony than what would prove that supposition. He scratched his head
+and rolled his quid in a perfect quandary.
+
+Another noise was heard on the stairs, as of several persons hurriedly
+ascending.
+
+Then the door opened, and an excited group made its appearance. In
+advance was a slender young man, whose face was pale with debauchery.
+His clothes were rich, and had an unpleasantly new look. As he stepped
+over the threshold, he glanced coolly about the room, and, his eyes
+resting on the coroner, smiled.
+
+"Ah, Myndert, my boy," said the coroner, "what are you here for?"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX.
+
+AN OLD MAN'S OFFERING.
+
+"Hang me if I know, Harry! It's the old man's work. He'll explain it to
+you."
+
+Behind this easy young man came a strong policeman, who, immediately
+upon his entrance, received a nod of approbation from the lieutenant.
+Behind the policeman walked, with bended white head and tottering limbs,
+the venerable Mr. Van Quintem. The old gentleman was partly supported,
+in his infirmity, by the boy Bog. It was a touching sight to see the
+confiding trust with which the weakness of sixty-eight clung to the
+strong arm of nineteen. Bog hung down his head modestly, and blushed. He
+was not seen even to look at the little veiled figure which sat in the
+middle of the room. But young Myndert Van Quintem looked at it, and
+bowed with the deepest respect. The bow was answered by a faint nod and
+a delicate blush. Mrs. Crull observed the interchange of recognitions,
+and frowned to herself.
+
+"Mr. Coroner," said the old gentleman, straightening himself, and coming
+forward with a quick step, as one who was about to perform an unpleasant
+task, and would hurry through it, "this young man is my son. God knows
+what love I have lavished upon him from the day that he was born, and
+with what ingratitude he has repaid me. But--but that is neither here
+nor there. I have come here to deliver him up to you as a prisoner--"
+
+"As a prisoner!" echoed the coroner; and he and all looked amazed at
+this strange announcement.
+
+"Why should it surprise you? It is a simple act of justice. I have
+reason to think that my son knows something about this murder" (here the
+old gentleman's voice faltered); "and my duty, as a good citizen and an
+honest man, requires me to surrender him. There are other affairs of a
+private nature between myself and my son--he knows to what I refer
+--which I am not prepared to make public at the present time." The old
+gentleman looked significantly at his son, who smiled calmly at him
+in return.
+
+A chair was brought for Mr. Van Quintem, sen., and he sank into it. The
+young man seated himself in another chair which was handed to him by the
+attentive coroner himself.
+
+"Now, Myndert, my good fellow," said the coroner, "if yer knows anything
+about this affair, fire away."
+
+"Will the coroner be good enough to swear the witness?" asked Fayette
+Overtop.
+
+"Oh! I'd quite forgot it." And the coroner mumbled his irreverent
+jargon.
+
+"Two minutes are enough to tell you all I know, Harry," said the young
+man, in a sweet, effeminate voice. "I happened to save Miss Minford's
+life, a few months ago--she will give you the particulars, no doubt, if
+you desire them--and that is the way I made her acquaintance." (Here
+another respectful bow to the young lady.) "Since then, I have met her,
+quite accidentally, a few times, and--I do not pretend to conceal
+it--have gradually come to feel an interest--a brotherly interest, I may
+call it--in her." (The coroner smiled.) "Having learned from her that
+she was receiving her education at the expense of Mr. Wilkeson, and that
+that gentleman was a constant visitor at her father's house I thought
+it proper, as a sincere and disinterested friend of the young lady, to
+make some inquiries into his character. Judging, from the result of
+these inquiries, that his designs were not honorable toward Miss
+Minford--Mr. Wilkeson will pardon the expression, but I am under oath,
+and must tell the truth as to my motives--I took the liberty of writing
+a note to Mr. Minford, merely cautioning him against Mr. Wilkeson. I did
+not sign my name to the note, because I was not personally acquainted
+with Mr. Minford--in fact, never saw him in my life--and did not wish to
+assume the responsibility, disagreeable to every sensitive person, of
+interfering in another man's family affairs. The object of the note was
+to make Mr. Minford cautious. I presume no one will undertake to say
+that a father can be too cautious concerning the honor of a young and
+lovely daughter." (Another respectful glance at Miss Minford.) "I am
+aware anonymous letters are a little irregular, in the opinions of most
+people. But, when sent with a good motive, I really don't see the
+harm in them."
+
+"Nor I neither," said the coroner. "It strikes me they're correct enough
+when the motive's a good 'un."
+
+"But, your Honor, when an anonymous letter is full of lies and slanders,
+I respectfully submit that it is a piece of cowardly malice, which the
+law ought to punish with the utmost severity." Fayette Overtop spoke
+with tranquillity and firmness, looking young Van Quintem directly in
+the eye, and making him quail.
+
+The judicious phrase, "Your Honor," alone saved Overtop from an
+explosion of official wrath. "The Court can't allow these interruptions,
+Mr. Overtop," said the coroner. "Her dignity must be maintained. As for
+'nonymous letters, whether it's right or wrong to send them, people will
+differ. The coroner and the jury is competent to judge for themselves.
+Go ahead, Myndert."
+
+"As the first letter seemed to have no effect, I sent another,
+suggesting that Mr. Minford should inquire into Mr. Wilkeson's history
+in the little village of----, Westchester County, where he was born,
+and lived many years. I learned from Miss Minford that her father
+visited Westchester County one day, and presume that he made some
+important discoveries there; for Miss Minford told me, that, on his
+return, he had forbidden Mr. Wilkeson to come to the house. If there was
+any harm in putting Mr. Minford on the track to find out the real truth
+about the man who was a constant attendant at his fireside, I do not
+see it."
+
+"Nor I neither," said the coroner. "The end, as the sayin' is, justifies
+the means."
+
+"If your Honor pleases," said the facile Overtop, "we could easily prove
+that all the reports which Mr. Minford gathered in Westchester County,
+prejudicial to my client, arose from a confounding of another person
+with him. But, as this explanation would involve the disclosure of
+private family affairs, and also the reflection of disgrace on the
+memory of the dead, my client prohibits me from saying more on the
+subject. But all this, as none knows better than your Honor, has nothing
+to do with the case. We ask that my client shall either be proved guilty
+of the murder, or of some knowledge of it, or released."
+
+Fayette Overtop here looked volumes of confidence at the jury; and five
+of the jury looked back volumes of agreement with him.
+
+"Nobody can be in a bigger hurry than me, Mr. Overtop," said the
+coroner, with tolerable good nature. "These 'ere inquests, commencin' in
+the mornin' and holdin' on a good part of the day, are rather hard on a
+chap 'customed to his 'leven-o'clock drink. I have to make up for the
+loss by adjournin' early in the arternoon. Ha! ha! Now, Myndert, my boy,
+rush her through. You don't know anythin' about the murder, I s'pose.
+You were somewhere else on the fatal night, of course--and I can guess
+where. At Brown's, eh?"
+
+Brown's was a notorious gambling house on Broadway.
+
+"Exactly, Harry. I was at Brown's from nine P.M. to four o'clock the
+following morning. And, if I mistake not, there is a gentleman in this
+room who can swear to having seen me there, say from ten to eleven."
+Saying this, young Van Quintem winked hard at the coroner.
+
+"You needn't mince matters," said the coroner. "I was at Brown's that
+night, and between the hours you name. Being a public officer, I
+sometimes look into Brown's, and a good many other places, too, to see
+that nothin' a'n't a-goin' on wrong. Ha! I partickly 'member it, because
+I accidentally lost about fifty dollars there that night. Ha! ha!"
+
+"I think I recollect the little circumstance," said the witness, with a
+smile.
+
+"Very likely. Ha! Now, Myndert, of course we all understand that you are
+innocent; but, to satisfy the public, I guess I'd better summon a few
+witnesses from Brown's, to prove you were there all night."
+
+"I thought of that, Harry, and requested a number of my friends at
+Brown's to drop around here, and prove an _alibi_ for me. They were very
+much engaged at the time, or they would have come with me."
+
+"They were playing faro," said the old gentleman, "and my son was
+gambling with them. Wretched young man, how often have I cautioned you
+against that vice!"
+
+"The cautioning I don't object to," said the son; "but I consider it
+unfair to drag a fellow away from a streak of good luck. I was raking in
+the piles just as you and the policeman, and that mop-headed youth
+behind you" (he alluded to the boy Bog) "came down on me. Ah! I see the
+game is finished, and here they are."
+
+Four men, of a highly correct appearance, dressed in quiet good taste,
+who would have passed in the Broadway muster for merchants of the
+severest practical variety, entered the room.
+
+They nodded in the most gentlemanly manner to the coroner, and gave a
+friendly recognition to young Myndert.
+
+"You may be willing to believe these polished scoundrels under oath;
+but hang me if I would!" said the old gentleman, with emphasis.
+
+The four gamblers showed their even rows of white teeth pleasantly, and
+one of them replied:
+
+"You are an elderly gentleman, Mr. Van Quintem, and the father of our
+young friend; and, of course, you are permitted to abuse us as much as
+you like."
+
+"It seems to me, Mr. Van Quintem," said the coroner, "that you are
+rather hard on these gen'lemen, who, so fur as I know 'em, is of the
+highest respectability. Don't yer want to have yer son prove
+an _alibi?_"
+
+"I want to have him prove the truth, and that's all. And for that reason
+I wouldn't credit such evidence as these men will give."
+
+"You would like to have me hanged, my dear father," said the son,
+mildly; "but I don't think you will be gratified in that amiable little
+desire. Eh, Harry?"
+
+The coroner grinned, shifted his quid, put on his most serious official
+look, and said:
+
+"No more of this 'ere jokin', if you please, gen'lemen. A inquest isn't
+zactly the place for fun."
+
+He then proceeded to swear and interrogate the four new witnesses. They
+took the oath decorously, kissing the book in the politest, most
+gentlemanly manner. Their testimony was to the effect that young Van
+Quintem passed the night of the murder, from ten P.M. till four A.M., at
+Brown's, and was not absent one minute. They were able to corroborate
+the fact, by a reference to pocket memorandum books, in which entries
+such as "Van Q., debit $50," or "Van Q., credit $100," appeared at
+intervals. As to the general character of the house, upon which several
+members of the jury asked questions, they testified that it was a
+species of club house, where a few gentlemen of excellent reputation
+occasionally met for the purposes of innocent social intercourse. Games
+of chance were sometimes played at Brown's, to while away an hour; and
+betting was now and then done, in a strictly honorable and legitimate
+way. Several of the jurymen would have improved the occasion, to learn
+all about the internal management of Brown's; but the coroner decided
+that such questions were entirely "relevant" (meaning irrelevant), and
+suggested that, as there were no more witnesses, the case might as well
+go to the jury. The coroner had just consulted his watch, and found that
+it was four o'clock. He was aware, from the turn things had taken, that
+he had lost the verdict which he hoped to obtain; but that was no reason
+why he should lose his dinner. The coroner was not a man of energy; and,
+being foiled in his efforts to convict Marcus Wilkeson, he had no
+disposition to pursue the matter further. Besides, he had already
+achieved a large measure of profitable notoriety from the case; for he
+had been ridiculed and abused in most of the city papers; and _that_
+insured him, beyond all doubt, the nomination for and election to the
+State Senate, for which he was an aspirant at the next fall campaign.
+Under all these circumstances, the coroner was satisfied.
+
+The jurors, receiving but a shilling a day, and being hungry and tired,
+were quite willing to wind up the case. After putting their heads
+together, whispering and nodding about five minutes, the foreman
+declared the following as their verdict:
+
+"That the deceased, Eliphalet Minford, came to his death, on the night
+of the ---- day of April, 185-, from a wound inflicted on the head by a
+club in the hands of some person unknown to the jurors."
+
+Overtop and Maltboy took the verdict as a matter of course, having
+anticipated it for some time. Marcus Wilkeson, who had been in a gloomy
+stupor for the past hour, and had expected the worst, looked up in
+surprise at this lucky dispensation of Fate. Tears sprang to his eyes,
+and he extended a hand to each of his faithful friends, by whom he was
+warmly congratulated on the happy issue of the affair. The jurors also
+came forward with their congratulations. Even the coroner said, "Well,
+Mr. Wilkeson, I did my pootiest to hold you, because I thought you was
+the murderer; but the jury doesn't indorse my 'pinion, and I gives in."
+Mrs. Crull, who had been watching Marcus narrowly, and was firmly
+impressed with the conviction of his innocence, came forward with a warm
+hand, and tried to think of a proverb suitable to the occasion, but
+could not. Patty Minford removed the veil from her face, and looked at
+her benefactor. She made a motion as if to rise and go toward him. Then
+an expression of doubt stole over her features; and Marcus, who observed
+her at that moment, knew that the vision of the night was still before
+her, and that she could not hold him guiltless though a dozen juries had
+released him. This thought touched Marcus with sadness, which all the
+congratulations of his friends could not disperse.
+
+A faint cry was heard. Old Mr. Van Quintem had fallen from his chair,
+and would have dropped upon the floor, but for the strong arm of the boy
+Bog. He was in the act of rising from his seat for the purpose of
+offering his hand to Marcus, when the vertigo, from which he was an
+occasional sufferer, seized him.
+
+"Poor old gentleman!" said Marcus, forgetful of all else, and rushing to
+the side of his venerable friend. Directing that the windows be opened,
+Marcus, aided by the boy Bog, bore the senseless form to the fresh, cool
+air. The grateful breeze, and a cup of cold water applied to his brow,
+soon restored the wretched father to a beginning of consciousness.
+
+As he lay there, more dead than alive, in the arms of his two friends,
+the ingrate son, having lighted a cigar, looked coldly over the
+shoulders of the bystanders at the senseless figure of his father, and
+said, in the sweetest voice:
+
+"Poor old fellow! He has only himself to blame for kicking up all this
+row. I told him it would be too much for his nerves; but he would insist
+on dragging me up here. I forgive him from the bottom of my heart."
+
+The bystanders looked on in amazement at this speech.
+
+The son continued: "I'm glad to see that he is in good hands. Upon my
+word, nothing would give me greater pleasure than to help a little; but
+I fear that, when the old man came out of it, and saw me over him, he
+would go off again. So I guess I had better leave."
+
+And young Van Quintem sauntered cheerfully out of the room, in company
+with his four friends from Brown's. The coroner had been waiting at the
+foot of the stairs for them; and the party adjourned to the nearest
+drinking saloon, when the coroner, overjoyed at having got rid of a
+tedious and embarrassing case, stood treat for one round.
+
+But who killed the inventor?
+
+The papers and the police, after groping for weeks in search of the
+answer, turned it over to the solution of Time, with the comforting
+assurance that MURDER WILL OUT.
+
+
+
+BOOK TENTH.
+
+DONE ON BOTH SIDES.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+A FISHER OF MEN.
+
+Mr. Augustus Whedell was a gentleman who had been living handsomely for
+three years on his wits.
+
+There was nothing remarkable in Mr. Whedell's personal appearance, with
+the exception of his wig. It was his fond belief that this wig looked
+like natural hair; but everybody knew it was a wig across the street. He
+also wore a gold double eyeglass, which he handled as effectively as a
+senorita her fan. Most of his loans, credits, and extensions, had been
+obtained by the dexterous manipulation of that eyeglass.
+
+Mr. Whedell twirled the dangerous instrument, and opened and shut it
+with more than his usual grace, one evening toward the middle of April.
+He was about to broach a disagreeable subject to his daughter, who,
+blooming, and exquisitely dressed, sat by the fire and yawned.
+
+"My dear Clementina, you are now twenty years old, and ought to be
+married. Delays are dangerous. What do you think of Chiffield?"
+
+Mr. Whedell spoke bluntly, and to the point, because he was addressing
+his own daughter, and also because short speeches suited his
+natural languor.
+
+"He's a horrid dancer!" said that young lady.
+
+"Granted. But when he does dance, he jingles money in his pocket."
+
+"He's a perfect fright, pa. You won't deny that?"
+
+"I won't deny that he is a plain, substantial gentleman. He has immense
+feet, and he is a little bald. What of that?"
+
+"Oh! nothing," replied Clementina, in a tone that signified
+"Everything."
+
+Her father caught the irony of the remark, and said:
+
+"My dear child, I know the natural leaning of your sex to handsome men.
+You are like your mother there. But remember, they never have any
+money--as a general rule. I won't undertake to explain the curious fact.
+But fact it is, you will admit that."
+
+"Very likely. But I hate this old Chiffield."
+
+Mr. Whedell smiled, twirled his double eyeglass a few dozen times round
+his forefinger, and said:
+
+"My darling daughter, listen, and you will appreciate the advantages of
+this match."
+
+Clementina frowned, and bit her finger nails.
+
+"My child," continued the fond parent, "I have always concealed my
+troubles from you. They can no longer be kept a secret. This house is
+not mine. Most of this furniture is unpaid for. The last month's bills
+at the butcher's, baker's, and grocer's are still due. I have exhausted
+my credit, and don't know where to raise a dollar. That is my
+'situation,' as the newspapers say."
+
+Clementina turned pale with amazement, and could not say a word.
+
+"You are willing to hear me? I will explain further. Three years ago, my
+old friend Mr. Abernuckle failed. He owned this house, and, wishing to
+save it from his creditors, he had previously made a sham sale of it to
+me. I have occupied it free of rent. On the strength of this house, I
+got credit for furniture, for clothes, for our bread and meat. On the
+strength of this house, I have borrowed money enough to keep my
+principal creditors at bay. On the strength of this house, we occupy
+to-day a very fair position in society. On the strength of this house, I
+propose to marry you."
+
+His daughter still looked on with open mouth, like one stupefied.
+
+"But, to do this, no time must be lost. My friend Abernuckle has at last
+settled with his creditors at fifteen per cent., and wants possession of
+the house on the 1st of May. On that day this will be our home
+no longer."
+
+There was a fearless pull at the door bell. "It is a creditor," said Mr.
+Whedell. "I will face him."
+
+Mr. Whedell went to the door, and returned in a few moments. "It was the
+butcher," said he. "He had called twice to-day, and, not finding me in,
+takes this unusual hour to ask for a settlement. The old excuses would
+not do. What do you suppose I told him this time?"
+
+"I can't imagine. Something dreadful, I suppose," was the shuddering
+reply.
+
+"The man had to be got rid of. We must have meat. I was at my wits' end.
+So I took the liberty of telling him, confidentially, that my daughter
+would marry a wealthy merchant in a few days, and asked him, as a favor,
+to let the bill run on to the 1st of May. On that day he should
+positively be paid. The man grumbled at first, but finally said he would
+give me one more trial, and then went away. Neatly arranged, wasn't
+it, my dear?"
+
+Mr. Whedell would have been delighted with one word of approval (even a
+qualified one) from his daughter, but she would not, or could not
+speak it.
+
+"You listen attentively, my darling. I am glad to see it. This plan
+worked so well with the butcher, that I shall try it on with the
+upholsterer, the baker, the grocer, the tailor, and the rest of my long
+list of creditors. I shall stake all on the 1st of May. To save us from
+a grand explosion, and to obtain a roof for your head and mine on the
+1st of May, you must marry immediately."
+
+Miss Clementina Whedell, like many other people, had an unsuspected
+strength of character which only a great occasion could call out. "It is
+perfectly atrocious," said she, at length, "and I am making a grave
+sacrifice of my happiness; but I suppose I must do it. Are you sure this
+Chiffield is rich?"
+
+"Now, you are my own dear daughter!" said Mr. Whedell, tossing his
+double eyeglass up and catching it, as was his custom when exulting.
+"Your question is a prudent one, and worthy of you. I am happy to inform
+you that Chiffield is worth one hundred and fifty thousand dollars."
+
+Clementina smiled faintly, though she tried to look like a martyr.
+
+"I learn this from the tax rolls. When Chiffield first began to call
+here, and showed a profound interest in my conversation, I knew that he
+was after you, and I thought it best to look into his resources. The tax
+rolls, which are the best possible evidence, show that he has ten lots
+in Harlem, with a cottage tenement on each of them, and several acres
+now rented to German gardeners in the Twelfth Ward. These are rated in a
+lump at seventy-five thousand dollars, which is a low estimate. So much
+for the real estate. Now the personal property of Upjack, Chiffield &
+Co. is valued on the same tax rolls (which always understate it) at
+three hundred thousand dollars. Suppose Chiffield to own a one-fourth
+interest only, and there you have the item of seventy-five thousand
+dollars more. Grand total, one hundred and fifty thousand dollars. A
+nearer figure would probably be two hundred thousand dollars; but I will
+not build castles in the air for you. Chiffield is only forty--which is,
+in fact, young. He is healthy and energetic. The firm are making money.
+He will yet be a millionnaire. Confess, now, that I have chosen
+wisely for you."
+
+Here another decisive pull at the door bell. Mr. Whedell answered it in
+person. Returning, he merely said, giving his double eyeglass a fillip,
+"The furniture man. Have fixed him for the 1st of May. So far, the plan
+works well."
+
+"But are you sure, pa," asked the discreet Clementina, "that Mr.
+Chiffield will offer himself?"
+
+"Positive; because he has always been so very attentive to me. When men
+flatter, and study the hobbies of the father, they are after the
+daughter in earnest. Mr. Chiffield's very figure--the cut of his jib, so
+to speak--is that of a marrying man. Only you must give him some little
+encouragement. Not keep him at a distance, as you have hitherto done."
+
+"But he may not be anxious to marry before the 1st of May. Then what?"
+
+"Poor thing! how little you understand mankind! He will marry you at
+twenty-four hours' notice, if you will let him. All men are alike
+impatient and unreasonable in such matters. It is the women who hold
+back--after they are safely engaged."
+
+"La, pa! how knowingly you talk!"
+
+"I flatter myself I know something of the human species," returned Mr.
+Whedell. "Ah! another ring. Too faint for a creditor. Mr.
+Chiffield, perhaps."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+PLAYING WITH THE LINE.
+
+The conjecture was correct. But with Mr. Chiffield came Matthew Maltboy.
+They had arrived on the door steps at the same moment, coming from
+different directions.
+
+Mr. Whedell received Chiffield with his heartiest grip, and inflicted
+only a mild squeeze on the hand of Maltboy, whose appearance at that
+time he considered decidedly unfortunate. The father thought he had
+observed in Clementina signs of preference for that corpulent young
+lawyer. He was pained to see that Clementina barely extended the tips of
+her fingers to Chiffield, while to Maltboy she gave her whole palm with
+great cordiality. Not only this, but she encouraged Maltboy to take a
+seat by her, and commenced talking with him of the opera, of balls, of
+new music, of fashions, of the last novel, rattling away on these
+subjects as if her whole soul were wrapped up in the discussion. It was
+almost a monologue. Maltboy's part consisted of "Yes;" "I think so too;"
+"We agree perfectly," and adjectives of admiration occasionally thrown
+in. That musical voice! He could have listened with rapture to its
+recital of the multiplication table.
+
+Mr. Chiffield and Mr. Whedell had settled themselves on a _tête-à-tête_,
+and, after some cursory observations on the weather, commenced talking
+of finance--a theme of which neither of those gentlemen ever tired.
+
+"So money is getting tighter?" said Mr. Whedell, after a pause to digest
+the awful truth which Mr. Chiffield had imparted to him. "Now I
+shouldn't be surprised, sir, to hear of failures before long, and in
+quarters where the public least expect them."
+
+If Mr. Whedell's double eyeglass had been astride his nose instead of
+swinging in his fingers, he might have noticed a faint paleness blending
+with the deep yellow of Mr. Chiffield's complexion. That gentleman
+replied, a little more quickly than was his wont:
+
+"A few small, weak houses may go down, perhaps, but the strong ones will
+weather the storm easy enough. If our establishment could live through
+1847, it is in no danger now."
+
+"And such was the good fortune of Upjack, Chiffield & Co., I well
+remember," said Mr. Whedell.
+
+Mr. Chiffield bowed his gracious acknowledgment of the handsome
+historical allusion.
+
+"How is Erie, Mr. Chiffield?"
+
+"Looking up."
+
+"Sure of it?"
+
+"A leading Wall-street man told me, this afternoon, it would advance
+three per cent. this week. I have a slight interest in watching it,"
+said Mr. Chiffield, smiling.
+
+"So have I," said Mr. Whedell, smiling also.
+
+Daring their conversation, and the remainder of their financial
+dialogue, Mr. Whedell kept one ear, and occasionally one eye, inclined
+toward his daughter and the favored Maltboy. If there was a hint
+conveyed in those side glances at his daughter, she either did not
+notice it, or did not choose to take it. Sometimes Mr. Chiffield looked
+in the same direction, but casually, as it were, and without one sign of
+impatience visible in the depths of his calm brown eyes. Mr. Chiffield
+was not a nervous man.
+
+Matthew Maltboy was so perfectly free from selfishness at this moment,
+that he would cheerfully have spared a few words from Miss Whedell's
+delightful monologue for the gratification of his late rival ("late" was
+now decidedly the word, in Maltboy's opinion) over the way. In the
+exercise of his large charity and compassion, he pitied that
+unfortunate, sadly disappointed dealer in dry goods.
+
+This pity, as Matthew used to say in after days, was thrown away. At the
+end of a brilliant description of a new set of quadrilles which Miss
+Whedell had danced at a sociable the night before, that young lady said,
+"Excuse me," and crossed the room to a what-not in the corner, and
+searched for something among a pile of magazines and pictures. The
+thought that she was making efforts to please him, tickled Matthew's
+vanity. While she was overhauling the pile, Mr. Whedell left his seat by
+Chiffield, and took the one just vacated by his daughter. Matthew
+received him with the diplomatic courtesy due to the parent of one's
+enchantress, and made a well-meant if not novel remark on the state of
+the weather. Mr. Whedell mildly disputed his proposition (whatever it
+was)--for Mr. W. was always disputatious on that subject--and then
+passed to the consideration of national politics. "The one topic
+natually suggests the other," said Mr. Whedell, "for they are equally
+variable." This was one of the father's few standard jokes; and Maltboy
+always laughed at it with the heartiness of a future son-in-law. They
+then grappled with the great theme in earnest.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+PULLING IN.
+
+Clementina, having found what she sought, glided to the chair which her
+father had relinquished, and said, coquettishly, "Now I have come to
+entertain _you_, Mr. Chiffield. You were speaking of Niagara Falls, the
+other day. Here are some photographs of them, taken for me on the spot."
+She handed the pictures to Mr. Chiffield. That gentleman took them with
+a profound bow, glanced over them, and said, "How elegant!" "What rich
+scenery!" "How tasty they are got up, a'n't they?" "This is the showiest
+picture;" "Here's a neat one," &c., &c., &c. Mr. Chiffield had
+contracted the use of a certain class of highly descriptive adjectives
+in selling dry goods. Clementina watched him narrowly, and thought how
+nicely she could manage this heavy fellow.
+
+"How many times have you been to the Falls?" she asked, when Chiffield
+had shuffled through the photographs twice.
+
+"Three times," said Chiffield, telling a white lie; for he had seen them
+at morning, noon, and evening on the same day. "And how often have you
+visited them, Miss Whedell?"
+
+"Oh! so often I can't remember. My last visit was early last autumn. Oh!
+pa, did we go to Niagara Falls before or after our trip to the White
+Mountains?"
+
+"After it, my child," replied the father, who maintained a cocked ear
+toward his child. "Don't you recollect we went from the Falls to Lake
+George, and stayed there till the first week in November? That was the
+year we omitted Newport and Saratoga, for a wonder," he added, conveying
+the idea, in a look to Mr. Chiffield, that such an omission was a marvel
+in their annual experiences.
+
+"You love the Falls, I suppose?" said Mr. Chiffield.
+
+"Oh! not much. I think they're dreadfully overrated." Clementina was
+determined not to be won too cheaply.
+
+"So I think," said Chiffield, delighted to speak his real sentiments
+this time; "though everybody is obliged to praise 'em, because that's
+the fashion."
+
+"But, though the Falls a'n't much, I must say the balls and hops are
+delightful. The fresh air there seems to give one strength to dance all
+night without a bit of fatigue. I bought these pictures because they
+show the hotels and other places where I have had such delicious
+dances."
+
+Chiffield execrated dancing, because he had large feet, and legs
+slightly bowed. He moved in the cotillon or waltz with a certain
+elephantine ponderousness and sagacity. Therefore she tantalized him
+with these reminiscences.
+
+"You see the Clifton House, there, on the Canada side? One night I
+danced eight waltzes, six polkas, four quadrilles, three fancy dances,
+and wound up, at five o'clock, with the German."
+
+"Wonderful!" observed Chiffield, not knowing what else to say.
+
+"Perhaps you think I was tired? Oh! not a particle. Next night we had a
+little hop on Table Rock. It was got up on short notice, but perfectly
+charming, I assure you. There were only two fiddles, and sometimes the
+noise of the Falls would almost drown the music. The fiddlers had to
+scrape so hard, that they gave out about three o'clock, and we had to
+give up the dancing, and go home, very much disappointed."
+
+"Unlucky, indeed!" interjected Chiffield.
+
+"But the next night we had two extra fiddlers. They relieved the other
+two at midnight, and then we danced till daybreak. Oh! such a glorious
+time. Next year, when I heard that a part of Table Rock had tumbled into
+the horrid river, I could have cried."
+
+"It was a great shame, indeed!" said Chiffield.
+
+"Isn't this view of Suspension Bridge natural?" she asked
+
+"Amazing!" said Chiffield; and he ventured to add that he considered
+that bridge to be a great triumph of human genius.
+
+"I dare say it is. But I didn't think of that. I was only going to tell
+you how the gentlemen of our Table Rock party tried to hire the use of
+the bridge one night to dance on. The owners wouldn't let it. Mean,
+weren't they?"
+
+"Contemptible!" replied Chiffield.
+
+"We should have had it nicely swept and lighted. The breeze coming down
+the river would have been beautiful, and the awful noise of the Falls
+wouldn't have been too loud for the music. But we almost made up for our
+disappointment. Next night, the gentlemen hired the 'Maid of the
+Mist'--the little steamboat, you know, that you see in this picture--and
+we sailed round and round below the Falls all night, dancing all the
+time. We went so near the Falls twice, that I got quite wet with the
+nasty spray, and caught cold; but that didn't prevent me from dancing
+all the next night, at the International. You have a good view of the
+house in this picture."
+
+"Tasty," said Chiffield.
+
+Mr. Whedell and Maltboy had not lost a word of this conversation, though
+they had been mutually boring each other with complex sentences about
+national politics. Happily, the discussion required no mental effort,
+and left them both free to hear and make mental comments on the dialogue
+that buzzed across the way.
+
+Mr. Whedell regretted that his daughter should expatiate with such
+vivacity upon a subject that must be extremely disagreeable to a
+gentleman of Mr. Chiffield's large figure and steady habits. To the
+cultivated judgment of Maltboy, it was evident that the young lady was
+trying to amuse Chiffield merely for the purpose of annoying him
+(Maltboy). Experience had taught Matthew the best kind of cure for this
+species of female perversity. He determined to leave the house, and
+thereby show that he was not to be trifled with.
+
+Availing himself of a pause in the dissertations on national politics,
+Maltboy pulled out his watch and consulted it. "Why!" said he; "nine
+o'clock! And I was to be in Fourteenth street by half past eight. Only
+intended to drop in just to see how you were. You really must excuse me,
+Mr. Whedell." Matthew rose as he spoke, to show that his mind was made
+up, and remonstrances would be useless.
+
+"Don't go. Put off your other call," ejaculated Mr. "Whedell, at the
+same time rising, and thereby indicating a perfect acquiescence in the
+departure of his guest.
+
+"You are in a hurry," said Miss Whedell, calmly, but without objection
+in voice or eye.
+
+Mr. Chiffield looked calmly at his rival; and none but a skilled student
+of physiognomy could have discovered a gleam of triumph in his dull,
+yellow face.
+
+Maltboy was disappointed in the calm demeanor of Miss Whedell; but,
+strong in his purpose, he walked toward the door, followed by the
+father. As he passed into the entry, he bowed coldly to the lady of his
+heart, and drew from her a scarcely perceptible nod.
+
+At this moment, a valuable thought occurred to the paternal Whedell.
+
+"My dear Maltboy," said he, closing the parlor door, "excuse the
+abruptness of the question; but could you lend me a couple of hundred?"
+
+The question was indeed abrupt, but not altogether unexpected. Mr. Quigg
+had apprised Maltboy of Mr. Whedell's financial weakness; but the
+infatuation of the ardent young bachelor had led him to disregard that
+warning. He was fully prepared to say, "Yes, with pleasure," and he
+did say so.
+
+"Thank you," said the gratified parent. "Only want it a few days." Mr.
+Whedell was too great an adept in the art of borrowing, to waste words
+of tedious explanation and gratitude, which only produce an impression
+that the borrower does not mean to pay. He accepted Maltboy's reply as a
+matter of course.
+
+"If not too much trouble, could you give me a check to-night?" asked
+Mr. Whedell. "Have a payment to make before bank hours to-morrow."
+
+"Most readily, my dear sir," replied the amiable Matthew. "Have you pen
+and paper convenient?"
+
+"In this room, Mr. Maltboy," said his host, ushering him into a little
+apartment at the end of the entry, which contained a few books, and was
+passed off upon a credulous world as Mr. Whedell's library. The gas was
+lighted, writing materials were produced, and, in less than three
+minutes, Matthew Maltboy had put his name at the bottom of a check on
+the ---- Bank, for two hundred dollars. He did so smiling, and with a
+full consciousness that he had sustained a dead loss to that extent. But
+he was always too good-natured to deny a friend; and, in this particular
+case, he felt that he was buying a perpetual free admission to the
+house, and a usufructuary interest in the fascinations of Clementina.
+The idea of marriage with that young lady had never occurred to him. He
+never troubled himself with problems of the future.
+
+"All right," said Mr. Whedell, folding up the check carelessly, and
+putting it in his pocket. "Shall I give you my note?"
+
+"Oh, no!" said the willing victim, blandly. "Hand it me any time, at
+your convenience."
+
+"Can return it within a week," responded Mr. Whedell; "but, on some
+accounts, the 1st of May will suit me best, if perfectly agreeable
+to you."
+
+"As you please."
+
+"We will call it the 1st of May, then. I regret you are in a hurry, sir.
+But remember, we are always happy to see you here."
+
+With this pleasant remark ringing in his ears, and fully compensating
+him for the loss of his two hundred dollars, Maltboy hastened home, but
+did not tell his friends of his adventure; but he smoked and mused over
+it agreeably, and was totally unmindful of the truth announced by Mr.
+Quigg on New Year's day, when speaking of this same Whedell, that
+"somehow debtors always give the cold shoulder to creditors, as if the
+creditors owed the money."
+
+Mr. Whedell, left to his own society, flattered himself that he had
+turned a rejected lover to a good account, and entered his library and
+sat down in the cold, that he might not, by his presence, mar the
+harmonious progress of the courtship upon which so much depended, in
+the parlor.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+THE FIRST OF MAY.
+
+Mr. Chiffield proposed, was accepted, and was married in a Broadway
+church about the middle of April. The affair was simplicity
+itself--bridesmaids, groomsmen, costly wedding costume, and the
+subsequent conventional reception at the bride's residence being
+dispensed with. The ceremony was witnessed only by the officiating
+minister, the sexton, the happy father, and about two hundred of the
+floating population of Broadway, including a number of pickpockets, one
+of whom sounded the recesses of the coat tails appertaining unto Mr.
+Whedell and his son-in-law, as they were coming out of church, and found
+nothing in them.
+
+The Siamese twins of the soul passed from the church amid the sneers,
+criticisms, and suppressed laughter of the spectators--who united in
+pronouncing the ceremony a shabby affair, not worth looking at--and,
+entering a carriage with Mr. Whedell, were driven to the New Jersey
+Railroad Depot furiously, as if they had been guilty of some crime
+against society. At the depot, Mr. Whedell kissed his daughter in
+public, and not without a touch of the melodrama, for which he had
+cherished a fondness in his earlier days, and wrung the hand of his
+son-in-law. The train bore the couple away toward the city of
+Washington, where a portion of that indefinite season known as the
+honeymoon was to be passed, amid every discomfort that money could
+purchase. Why they should have gone to Washington in pursuit of bad
+hotels, and other miseries, when they could have procured them in so
+many other parts of the country for a quarter of the money, was
+something which Mr. Chiffield was never able to explain to his own
+satisfaction.
+
+He afterward bitterly regretted that he had not made the nuptial trip to
+Newburg, or some place near the city, where the expenses would have been
+more moderate. But we anticipate.
+
+Mr. and Mrs. Chiffield had been absent ten days. They were expected home
+on the 28th day of April; but a letter from Clementina informed her
+father that she had taken a bad cold, was confined to her room, and
+could not return before the 1st of May. The brief note was written in a
+crabbed hand, and exhibited spots, which, if not lemon juice, were
+tears. She made no allusion to her husband, but wound up by saying, "Oh,
+pa! I am an unhappy girl!"
+
+This intelligence was a thorn in the bed of Mr. Whedell's comfort. Had
+he not arranged to settle with his creditors on the 1st of May? Was not
+the owner of the house occupied and used by him to resume possession on
+that eventful day? And was not everything--even his daily
+food--dependent on the return of his children, as he fondly called them,
+with their pockets full of money? What if this infernal cold should keep
+them in Washington until after the 1st of May? As Mr. Whedell thought of
+himself, turned adrift, and a wanderer, he invariably tore out a few of
+the gray hairs which could be poorly spared from his venerable skull.
+
+Mr. Whedell had a deep and unchanging faith in his ill luck; but, this
+time, he was pleasantly disappointed. The morning train on the 1st of
+May brought back his children to him. They arrived just as those
+Bedouins of civilization--the New Yorkers--were beginning to indulge
+their nomadic propensities. The streets were full of wagons and drays
+laden with jingling stoves, rickety bedsteads, conspicuous crockery, and
+other damaged Penates, on the way to new domiciles. Fortunately, the
+owner of Mr. Whedell's residence had not yet come to claim possession.
+Creditors are early birds; but the hour--sis and a half A.M.--was even
+too early for them; and only one--Mr. Rickarts, the shoemaker--had
+called. He had been disposed of in the library, by the servant, under
+the pretence that Mr. Whedell was not yet up. But Mr. Whedell was up and
+dressed before six o'clock, and was watching for the expected carriage,
+through the window blinds of his apartment. He ran down to the door with
+juvenile briskness to receive the returning ones.
+
+Mrs. Chiffield looked pale and jaded. Her hair was carelessly arranged,
+and her bonnet awry--unerring indications of fathomless female misery.
+To the anxious inquiry by her parent after her health, she only replied,
+"Horrid!" Mr. Chiffield wore the aspect of a man who is disappointed in
+his just expectations. He gave a hearty grip to the proffered hand of
+his father-in-law, but he quarrelled with the driver over the fare, and
+abused him in an under tone, by way of relieving himself.
+
+"And how did you like Washington, my child?" said the fond father, in
+his tenderest voice.
+
+"I hate it!" said Mrs. Chiffield, hurrying into the house, as if she
+were running away from her husband.
+
+"Hum. Well, I'm not surprised that she dislikes the capital. I believe
+most visitors do. Clemmy seems to be a little nervous from travelling,
+eh?" Mr. Whedell addressed these remarks to his son-in-law.
+
+"Nervous? Perhaps she is just a trifle nervous, sir. All women are."
+
+"True--true! One of the peculiarities of the sex. Well, you have had a
+pleasant time, I trust?"
+
+"Pleasant time? Oh! yes--delightful! Your daughter is a charming girl,
+sir, and will make a most excellent wife." Mr. Chiffield spoke as if he
+were very much in earnest, but the expression of his face was not
+of rapture.
+
+"She is a treasure, sir--a perfect treasure!" replied the doting parent.
+"It cost me many pangs to part with her. I trust that we shall not be
+separated now. Why should we be? There are but three of us--just enough
+for a happy family." Mr. Whedell was hinting at a home under the future
+roof of his son-in-law.
+
+"I agree with you perfectly," said Mr. Chiffield, with unaffected
+eagerness. "Let us live together always. It will suit me exactly." He
+was thinking of free board and lodging at the house of his
+father-in-law.
+
+The couple shook hands, mutually pleased at the prospect, and beamed on
+each other.
+
+A part of this conversation took place in the hall, into which the
+hackman had borne the travellers' luggage. A pull was heard at the door
+bell--a loud, confident pull--which Mr. Whedell knew could be inflicted
+only by a creditor. It would not do to admit his son-in-law into his
+budget of family secrets just yet. So he said:
+
+"Now, Chiffield, you must need some rest. Let me not detain you, my dear
+fellow. Your room is on the first floor. I'll show it to you."
+
+Mr. Whedell snatched a carpet bag out of the hand of his son-in-law, and
+hurried up stairs with him. Having turned that gentleman into the
+apartment reserved for him, and shut the door, Mr. Whedell paused at the
+head of the stairs, and listened for the developments below. The
+servant, after waiting for two or three more jerks at the bell, so as to
+be quite sure that it was the bell, went to the door, and there found
+Mr. Numble, the butcher, who supplied the Whedells with meat on the
+strength of the brownstone front.
+
+Pursuant to instructions, the servant explained that Mr. Whedell was not
+up, and asked him to walk into the library and wait a few minutes. Mr.
+Numble growled--as if he scented deception not far off--but allowed
+himself to be conducted into the library. There he discovered Mr.
+Rickarts, the shoemaker, taking down the few books which graced the
+shelves of the library, and evidently pricing them with an unpractised
+eye. The two gentlemen knew each other, and straightway engaged in a
+brisk dialogue about the weather.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+DEMOLITION OF CERTAIN AIR CASTLES.
+
+The coast being clear, Mr. Whedell hastened down stairs to the front
+parlor, where his daughter had secluded herself immediately after her
+entrance into the house. She was lying back on the sofa, with her bonnet
+on, biting the ends of her gloves, and staring into space. She did not
+appear to observe her father.
+
+Mr. Whedell seated himself on the other end of the sofa, and reached out
+his hand, as if he would have taken his daughter's caressingly within
+it. If that was his intention, it was frustrated by her drawing the hand
+away. Then the father heaved a sigh, and said:
+
+"Ah, my child, I am so thankful that you have returned to-day. You will
+save us from ruin."
+
+"_I_ save you from ruin!" said Mrs. Chiffield, in a hollow voice.
+"That's a good joke!"
+
+Mr. Whedell grinned a ghastly smile, as if he did not precisely see the
+point of the jest. "Joke or no joke," said he, "I must look to you for
+some money to put off the infernal creditors, who have begun to flock
+into the house. There's the bell. Hang me, if it isn't another one! To
+come to the point, then, I wish you would loan me, say two hundred
+dollars. It is a small amount, but will stave them off a week or two."
+
+"Two hundred dollars!" Mrs. Chiffield opened her fine eyes in amazement.
+
+"That's all. Perhaps you have saved up the amount from your pin money?
+Or, if you have been a little extravagant, and spent it all, why, then,
+perhaps you can get it from Mr. Chiffield this morning?"
+
+The daughter laughed bitterly again. "I tell you, father," said she,
+"that this man is the meanest creature that walks OB two legs. He has
+not spent fifty dollars on both of us, during our absence. As for me, I
+have never got a cent from him, though I have dropped a thousand hints
+about new bonnets, dresses, and jewelry."
+
+"Gracious heavens!" cried Mr. Whedell, turning pale "But then," he
+added, with an effort to laugh, "Mr. Chiffield is a business man, and
+was an old bachelor. He knows nothing of women's wants. It must be your
+mission to teach him what they are."
+
+"Pooh!" said the daughter; "I don't believe he has got any money."
+
+"Don't talk so, my child. You put me in a cold sweat."
+
+"Anyhow, I examined his pocket, last night, when he was asleep in the
+cars, and found only five dollars there."
+
+Mr. Whedell's jaw dropped. "Oh, no! it can't be," said he, at length.
+"Mr. Chiffield must be a rich man. You remember his fine horses at
+Saratoga and Newport. You remember how much his society was courted by
+mammas with disposable daughters. They never patronize poor young men.
+Their instinct in finding out rich ones is unerring. And furthermore,
+Mr. Chiffield is a member of a firm twenty years old, who are marked 'A
+No. 1' on the books of a mercantile agency, that makes it a business to
+pry into other people's affairs. I paid ten dollars for the information,
+only a month ago. He must be rich! He must be rich!" Mr. Whedell
+repeated it twice, as if the repetition put the question of Chiffield's
+opulence beyond a doubt. "Ha! there goes that dreadful bell again!"
+
+"What you say may be true, but I don't believe a word of it, till I have
+the proofs," replied the daughter, who seemed to delight in taking a
+gloomy view of her case. "Why--will you believe it?--I can't get him
+even to talk about engaging a house in New York. He always dodges the
+subject, somehow. Upon my word, I think he expects to quarter on you for
+the balance of his life. That would be rich!"
+
+Mr. Whedell raised his eyebrows, and emitted a doleful whistle.
+Reflecting, he said:
+
+"You may misjudge him. Perhaps he doesn't like to disturb Love's young
+dream, by looking into the future. That's all--I'm sure of it."
+
+"Humbug!" ejaculated Mrs. Chiffield.
+
+"Poor thing!" said her father, tenderly. "There--cheer up. Depend upon
+it, that you have got a rich husband, who will take all our troubles off
+our shoulders. Stay here, and I will go up stairs and sound him."
+
+Mr. Whedell proceeded to the apartment where his son-in-law was shut up,
+and found that individual in a deep fit of meditation.
+
+"Thinking--and so soon after marriage?" said Mr. Whedell, with a
+charming smile.
+
+"Oh, yes; and I was thinking how much happier is a married man than a
+bachelor."
+
+"You will always think so, I am sure, with my dear Clemmy as your wife.
+My dear Clemmy! How naturally that phrase comes to my lips. And you are
+about to take her away. It's a foolish thought, but I hardly know how I
+shall live without her." Mr. Whedell paused, for effect, and
+contemplated the vermicular work in the carpet.
+
+"A happy thought strikes me," said Chiffield. "You have a house here,
+already furnished. Let us occupy it free of rent, and I will pay the
+housekeeping bills of the establishment. That will be mutually
+advantageous, and will especially suit your daughter, who, of course,
+has a child's attachment for home. What do you say to the proposition,
+respected father-in-law?"
+
+Mr. Whedell did not catch at it with the alacrity that was expected of
+him. "A capital plan," said he, at length; "but, unfortunately, the
+house is not mine. I only lease it."
+
+Chiffield's lips puckered up. "That's curious," thought he. "The old
+fellow must have put his money into bonds and stocks. Well, they are the
+best-paying investments."
+
+Mr. Whedell proceeded to break the news of his penniless condition to
+his son-in-law, gently. "Mr. Chiffield," said he, "as a wholesale
+dealer in dry goods, you must have observed, perhaps at times
+experienced, the fickleness of fortune."
+
+"Can he suspect?" thought Chiffield. "And what if he does? The truth
+cannot be concealed much longer. But I will pump him a little further
+before disclosing all."
+
+"Yes," said he; "our firm, like others, has had its ups and downs; but
+then, business would not be interesting without some little risks,
+you know."
+
+The easy manner of his son-in-law convinced Mr. Whedell that no "little
+risks" had shaken the firm of Upjack, Chiffield & Co. "Ah, yes," said
+he. "Rich to-day, poor to-morrow--the history of the world. As every
+person may learn this by his own sad experience, some time or other, he
+ought to be lenient in judging of those who have become reduced from
+wealth to poverty."
+
+"Can he mean me?" thought the son-in-law. "Faith! it sounds very much
+like it. If so, his manner of broaching the subject is truly generous
+and delicate."
+
+"I agree with you," said he, aloud. "Money does not make the man." It is
+a safe adage, and Chiffield quoted it intrepidly.
+
+"True--true!" replied Mr. Whedell. "Money is but a small item in the sum
+of earthly happiness. Take the institution of marriage, for example.
+What gives to that institution its blessedness--love, or money?"
+
+"Love," responded the unhesitating Chiffield.
+
+"The promptness of that reply shows that he does not expect a fortune
+with Clemmy," thought Mr. Whedell.
+
+"He must suspect--perhaps already knows--the truth," thought Chiffield.
+"How kind in him to spare me the least humiliation!"
+
+"That person is truly rich," continued Mr. Whedell, "rich beyond
+expression, who brings pure love and exalted virtues into the
+married state."
+
+"Generous father-in-law!" thought Chiffield. "He knows that I am ruined.
+Yet how nobly he treats me! I may cast away all reserve now."
+
+"It would be an affectation, sir," said Chiffield, aloud, "to pretend
+that I do not understand to whom you refer, my dear father-in-law."
+
+"The glorious fellow!" thought Mr. Whedell. "He guesses what I am about
+to disclose, and yet calls me a dear father-in-law."
+
+Chiffield continued: "To save any further circumlocution, sir, and in
+order that we may fully understand each other, I will say at once, that
+we are completely--ruined!"
+
+"Ha! What! Who ruined?"
+
+"The house of Upjack, Chiffield & Co. I--I thought you knew it."
+
+"Ruined, sir!" cried Mr. Whedell, livid with horror. He choked for
+further utterance.
+
+"Yes, sir," said Chiffield, who, being a fat man, was happily calm;
+"totally ruined."
+
+"You impudent scoundrel! out of this house!" shrieked Mr. Whedell,
+rising from his chair, and glaring like a wildcat at his son-in-law.
+
+"Be calm," said that phlegmatic individual. "I respect your age."
+
+"Curse your impudence! what do you mean by my age?" (approaching
+Chiffield in a threatening manner). "I'll let you know, sir, that I am
+young enough to kick a swindler like you into the street."
+
+"Pray compose yourself, sir," returned the bland Chiffield. "Your
+surprise and excitement are natural, and therefore pardonable. But my
+affairs are, after all, not quite as bad as they might be. I have a sure
+prospective fortune, if not a present one."
+
+"What do you mean, sir?" asked Mr. Whedell, not quite so savage as
+before.
+
+"That I have talents, energy, a large business acquaintance," said the
+cheerful Chiffield.
+
+"Humbug!" roared Mr. Whedell. "What is all that stuff good for, without
+money?"
+
+"Not much, I admit," was the conciliatory reply. "There fore, sir, to
+come to the point at once, advance me ten thousand dollars to start in
+business again, and I will make a fortune in three years. It was the
+outside speculations of my partners that ruined me. Perhaps you don't
+know that dry goods are going up, sir? Now's the time to buy."
+
+"This man will drive me mad!" shrieked Mr. Whedell, combing his hair
+wildly with his hands.
+
+"Regard it in the light of a family investment," suggested the soothing
+Chiffield.
+
+"You diabolical scoundrel!" yelled Mr. Whedell, in a partial asphyxia of
+rage; "if I had a million dollars to-day, I wouldn't give you a cent.
+You should starve first. But I want to tell you--and hang me if it isn't
+a pleasure, too--that I am a beggar, sir--a beggar, sir--a beggar, sir!
+By noon to-day I shall be turned out of this house. And, by Jove! I'm
+glad of it, for then I shall get rid of you." During this _adagio_
+passage, the speaker shook his fist within a few inches of
+Chiffield's nose.
+
+The summery Chiffield answered, with a hearty laugh: "I see," said he;
+"it's a regular sell on both sides. However, neither of us is worse off
+than he was, since neither of us had anything. As for me, I have gained
+one point, for I have a tolerably good-looking wife."
+
+Mr. Whedell was about to retort in a vein of unmitigated ferocity, when
+Mrs. Chiffield, who had been listening in the entry, and could contain
+herself no longer, rushed into the room, and, brandishing a small
+clenched hand in the face of her laughing spouse, forcibly observed:
+
+"You sneaking, swindling, cheating, lying, black-hearted, ill-looking
+pauper, scoundrel, and vagabond!"
+
+"Very prettily said," remarked the imperturbable Chiffield.
+
+"You miserable thief!" continued his matrimonial partner, aiming a blow
+at him, which he playfully parried; "why didn't you tell me you were
+a beggar?"
+
+"Why? Because you didn't ask me. For that matter, why didn't you or
+your father tell me that _you_ were beggars?"
+
+"I sha'n't answer your insulting questions, you mean, deceiving, ugly,
+ungentlemanly--" (no other epithet suggesting itself.) At this crisis,
+the infuriated wife burst into tears, and wished several times that
+she was dead.
+
+"Poor, dear wifey!" said the emollient Chiffield.
+
+"None of your 'poor dears' to my daughter, you jailbird!" screamed Mr.
+Whedell.
+
+"Now, don't get excited, father-in-law."
+
+"How dare you call me father-in-law, sir!"
+
+"Perhaps you prefer the more endearing epithet of 'poppy,' sir?"
+
+"Monster! will you leave my house?"
+
+"Have you any good old brandy on hand?" asked Chiffield.
+
+"Brandy! No. If you want brandy, sir, go to the d---l for it."
+
+"Not quite so far, thank you," retorted Chiffield the genial; "but I
+don't mind walking to the next corner for a smash."
+
+Chiffield rose, put on his hat, and stepped toward the door.
+
+"Good-by, wifey. I sha'n't be gone long."
+
+A growl, bisected by a sob, was the only reply.
+
+"By-by, poppy," said Chiffield, with a flippant wave of the hand.
+
+Mr. Whedell cast at him a look of scorn, to which justice could be done
+in no known language; and Chiffield, with a bow of exceeding grace, left
+father and child to their reflections.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+MR. WHEDEEL'S CREDITORS IN CONVENTION ASSEMBLED.
+
+These reflections, which were neither profitable nor interesting to the
+parties immediately concerned, were interrupted by a peculiarly
+rigorous pull at the door bell. Pulls of a startling description had
+come so often, the previous ten minutes, that Mr. Whedell had quite
+ceased to notice them. But this long and strong pull caused him to
+start, and remark, "It must be Quigg."
+
+It was Quigg, who had come to make his last appeal. He was by far the
+heaviest creditor. The unfortunate servant girl, acting under her
+general instructions, would fain have shown him into the parlor, where
+his fellow sufferers, having overrun the library and dining room, were
+already in strong force; but Quigg, having immense interests at stake,
+would stand no such nonsense.
+
+"Where is Whedell?" said he. "I can't dance attendance on him all day."
+
+It was always remarked that Quigg put off his slow and stately method of
+speech, when dealing with obstinate debtors.
+
+The terrified Mary lost her presence of mind, and replied; "In the first
+floor, front." Quigg mounted the stairs with surprising agility, and
+gave a hard rap at the door of the first floor front.
+
+Mr. Whedell said, in a voice calm with despair, "Come in." In the few
+minutes that had elapsed since the retirement of Chiffield, Mr. Whedell
+had privately determined to give up everything to his creditors, leaving
+them to divide the spoils among themselves, and then to go out, expend
+his last quarter on a dose of poison, and end his existence. This
+resolution, suddenly taken, imparted preternatural composure both to his
+mind and his face. He could now see his way out of all difficulties--or
+out of the world, which is the same thing. Clementina, who had not yet
+risen to that height of philosophy, buried her face in her hands, and
+sobbed with fresh violence.
+
+Quigg entered, and at a glance saw that he had lost. He stopped short in
+the bow that he was intending to make.
+
+"Well, Whedell," said he, roughly, "how are things to-day?" By "things,"
+he always meant money.
+
+"Not a penny," said Mr. Whedell. "I've done my best to pay you, and
+failed."
+
+"Just as I expected. Serves me right. I never was forbearing with a
+debtor, that I didn't get chiselled this way. Strike me if I ever make
+the mistake again. This marriage of your daughter's, which was going to
+set you up in funds, has proved a fizzle, eh? Instead of taking somebody
+in, you have been taken in yourself."
+
+Quigg laughed; and then remembering that a delinquent debtor was before
+him, assumed his wonted serious aspect.
+
+At this allusion, poor Mrs. Chiffield burst into tears again. Mr.
+Whedell adroitly turned the circumstance to advantage. He pointed to
+her, and said, "There is my reply."
+
+Quigg felt that he was losing ground on these side issues. "Well,
+Whedell, we must have a settlement to day. You owe me one hundred and
+fifty dollars. Turn over all your furniture to me, and we'll call
+it square."
+
+Mrs. Chiffield doubled her sobs anew. But Mr. Whedell said, "Very good.
+Take everything, I shall want nothing where I am going."
+
+Quigg had been accustomed to these dark hints from contumacious debtors,
+and was not to be frightened. "I accept your offer," said he, "and will
+take everything."
+
+At this moment, a rush, as of many feet, was heard upon the stairs. The
+owners of the feet appeared to be literally tumbling up in their anxiety
+to get up. By the time Quigg could open the door, a half dozen flushed
+persons were ready to step in, and did so, brushing him aside. More than
+a score of others followed, and all plunged pell mell into the presence
+of Mr. Whedell and daughter.
+
+"Here we are, Mr. Whedell, by appintment," said the spokesman of the
+party, Rickarts, the shoemaker.
+
+"I see you are," responded the placid Whedell. "Take seats, if you can
+find them, gentlemen." This with a real smile, for he thought of the
+arsenic, and the immeasurable relief that it would afford him.
+
+"We don't want seats, Mr. Whedell; and, if we did, there isn't enough
+for all of us. We want our pay, and have got tired of waitin' down
+stairs for it. You put us all off to the 1st of May, you know, expecting
+you said, to raise money enough by the marriage of your daughter (excuse
+the remark, marm, but business is business) to pay off all of us. We
+found, on comparin' notes down stairs, this mornin', that you had told
+the same story to everybody. Now, sir, as your daughter is married,
+accordin' to the papers, and the 1st of May has arriv', will you be good
+enough to square up?"
+
+Mr. Whedell smiled touchingly. "My good and patient friends," said he,
+"nothing would give me greater pleasure--I might say, without
+exaggeration, rapture--than to pay all that I owe, with compound
+interest thrown in. But, unfortunately for my excellent intentions, I
+have no money."
+
+"Blast me if that isn't just what we expected! I told 'em, down stairs,
+that I'd bet ten to one you couldn't or wouldn't raise any think out of
+your son-in-law."
+
+"Your name is Rickarts, I believe?" asked Mr. Whedell.
+
+"Yes, Rickarts!" growled the owner of the appellation, "You ought to
+know it by this time; for I've dunned you often enough."
+
+"True, Mr. Rickarts, but then I have so many creditors, you see, that I
+cannot be expected to know them all. I merely wanted to observe, Mr.
+Rickarts, that, at least, _you_ have not been disappointed in your
+expectations. Furthermore, that if you had made a bet of ten to one, it
+wouldn't have been a bad speculation for you."
+
+Cries of "Pshaw!" "Humbug!" "Swindled!" "Done for!" and kindred
+expressions, arose from all sides. The spokesman said: "We ha'n't got no
+time to joke, Mr. Whedell. We have only to remark, now, that the best
+thing for you to do is to give up your furniture, without the trouble
+and expense of a lot of lawsuits."
+
+"You are perfectly welcome to the whole of it, my good friends," said
+Mr. Whedell.
+
+"The, deuce they are!" cried Quigg. "Why, you have just turned it over
+to me!"
+
+"I give it to all of you, singly and collectively, severally and
+jointly," responded the happy, melancholy man. "Divide it among
+yourselves, and leave me."
+
+The small creditors, under twenty dollars, took a favorable view of the
+proposition. One of them immediately jumped on a bureau having a marble
+top and elaborately carved legs, and expressed his willingness to take
+that for his pay. Another laid violent hands on the heavy yellow window
+curtains, and declared himself satisfied. A third commenced ripping up a
+corner of the carpet, and notified all persons that he claimed _that_.
+The original owner of the bureau, curtains, and carpet, who had
+furnished the house, and held an exalted rank among the principal
+creditors, objected to this summary disposition of the property. Quigg,
+in very emphatic but improper English, insisted that he had the largest
+and first claim, and warned everybody on their peril not to remove a
+thing from the house.
+
+Mr. Whedell reclined in his chair, positively enjoying the spectacle,
+which was all the more entertaining because the common wrath was now
+diverted from him. Mrs. Chiffield wept behind her handkerchief. Her
+bonnet was knocked on one side, and the flowers were seriously
+disarranged, indicating a real case of distress.
+
+_Sauve qui peut_ was now the motto among all the small creditors.
+Notwithstanding the energetic objections of Quigg and others, they
+rushed down stairs into the parlors, where the best furniture was kept,
+and commenced, taking possession. Rickarts, the shoemaker, seated
+himself on the top of the piano, and said he considered that his'n. But
+a second after, a man milliner, who had furnished two new bonnets to
+Miss Clementina on the strength of the brownstone front, took his seat
+on the other end of the piano, and gave Mr. Rickarts distinctly to
+understand that he was glued to it. The man milliner was a powerful
+fellow, and looked as if his proper vocation were hammering stone or
+rolling iron, instead of handling flowers and feathers. Rickarts
+murmured something inaudibly, at first but, on taking a second survey of
+his neighbor, concluded that he would be more desirable as an ally than
+as an enemy.
+
+"All right," said he; "s'pose we go snacks on this?"
+
+"Agreed," said the man milliner.
+
+Other of the minor creditors, not caring to quarrel for a third or
+fourth interest in the piano, attached themselves to movable pieces of
+furniture, such as ottomans, whatnots, etageres, and chairs. One
+succeeded in unscrewing a large chandelier which hung from the centre of
+the front parlor, and the gas came pouring through the opening in
+odorous volumes, while the spoliator waddled off to the door with his
+prize. Others rummaged the small stock of showy books which consituted
+the library, and were surprised to find that the most imposing volumes
+were bound in wood, with gilt backs, and contained nothing but air,
+which a funny creditor characterized as very light reading matter.
+
+In about five minutes, a considerable amount of portable property would
+have gone out of the house, but for Quigg's presence of mind. Seeing
+that decisive action was required, he slipped out of the front door,
+locked it, and returned in a moment with a couple of policemen, who
+chanced to be strolling through the street at that hour.
+
+On the way to the house, Mr. Quigg succeeded in persuading the policemen
+that it was necessary for the peace of society that they should turn all
+the other creditors out of the house, and leave Mr. Whedell's effects to
+be divided among them according to the regular legal process. As the
+officers marched up the steps of the house, it fell out that Matthew
+Maltboy came sauntering by. Observing the two officers, headed by an
+excited individual, going into Mr. Whedell's house, it occurred, to his
+benevolent heart that that gentleman must be in trouble. He also felt
+moved by a desire to hear of his old flame--for such she now seemed at
+the remote distance of six weeks,--of whose marriage with Mr. Chiffield
+he had read in the papers with the utmost complacency. Therefore,
+Maltboy stepped up behind the officers, and was about to follow them
+into the house. The officers would have kept him back; but Quigg
+recognized his friend of New Year's day, and asked him in, hoping to get
+legal advice for nothing.
+
+"An old friend of mine, and of Mr. Whedell's," said Quigg. "Admit him,
+officers. Perhaps, sir" (Quigg had forgotten his name), "you know
+something about Whedell's affairs, and, as a lawyer" (with a wink), "can
+tell me where he has some property snugly stowed away, that I can pounce
+on. If so, I would cheerfully let the smaller creditors divide the
+furniture among themselves. Any information--ahem!--will be
+confidential, you know."
+
+"I am not a shyster!" said the indignant Matthew, alluding, by that
+term, to the outlaws of his profession.
+
+Quigg was evidently surprised at this unfriendly repulse. "I only made
+the suggestion for you to think on. No offence meant. Please walk
+in, sir."
+
+The door being opened, several of the small creditors were discovered,
+grouped together, with property in their hands. They had made several
+ineffectual attempts to break the lock, or pry back the bolt. The larger
+creditors were forcibly remonstrating against this disposition of Mr.
+Whedell's effects; and a serious row would probably have ensued, but for
+the timely arrival of the police.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+DEUS EX MACHINA.
+
+One of the officers planted himself against the front door, and gave
+general notice that no one would be allowed to remove any of the
+furniture. The other officer stationed himself at the back door, to
+carry out a similar policy at that point.
+
+These manoeuvres caused consternation among the small creditors, and a
+vivid feeling of approval among the larger ones.
+
+"I am happy to announce," said Quigg, "that the counsel of Mr.
+Whedell--one of the most distinguished ornaments of the bar--has now
+arrived, and will take charge of his client's affairs. To those who know
+the name of--" (Aside) "By the way, your name escapes me at
+this moment."
+
+"Maltboy," said Matthew, a little flattered with this compliment.
+
+"I repeat, that, to those who know the name of Maltboy, no assurance
+need be given that Mr. Whedell's affairs will be honorably adjusted."
+Quigg again winked at the young lawyer.
+
+Matthew, having recovered from the flutter into which he was thrown, was
+about to disclaim the office thus thrust upon him, when the voice of Mr.
+Whedell was heard from the first landing. He had come to listen to the
+disturbance, and smile at it.
+
+"It is my dear Maltboy!" he exclaimed, catching at the straw of a hope.
+"Thank Heaven! he is here. Yes, gentlemen, he is my lawyer, and I refer
+you to him for the adjustment of all your claims. Come up, my
+dear Maltboy."
+
+"Oh! it is dear--good--Mr. Maltboy!" added a voice, qualified by sobs.
+"How kind of him--to--to come here at this time! Oh--ho!"
+
+Maltboy never could resist Beauty in any condition; and, for Beauty in
+tears, he would cheerfully lay down his life. He did not deny that he
+was the counsel and confidential adviser of Mr. Whedell, but rushed up
+stairs, just in time to receive the falling form of Mrs. Chiffield
+in his arms.
+
+Matthew felt that he had no moral right to clasp that burden of
+loveliness; but he took it tenderly in his arms, and followed Mr.
+Whedell into the room which father and daughter had just left. There he
+deposited it, with the gentleness of a professional nurse, on the sofa,
+when it opened its eyes, and faintly said, "Heaven bless you, our
+benefactor!"
+
+The creditors were pouring into the apartment. "In the name of
+humanity," said Mr. Whedell, "leave us for a few moments. I appeal to
+you as gentlemen and Christians."
+
+The appeal produced no effect; those to whom it was made conceiving,
+perhaps, that it did not apply to them. Maltboy added the remark: "If
+you will withdraw at once, I promise you that in fifteen minutes we will
+proceed to business."
+
+"That's all right," said Quigg, winking again at Matthew. "Let us go,
+friends."
+
+The proposition was accepted, as the best thing that could be done under
+the circumstances, and all the creditors retired.
+
+Mr. Whedell then locked the door, and proceeded to inform Mr. Maltboy of
+the black-hearted treachery of which he and his daughter had been the
+victims, in the Chiffield alliance. Clementina corroborated the paternal
+statement with numerous particulars, delivered in a heart-broken voice,
+showing what an abandoned wretch her husband was. Matthew listened,
+nodded his head, and said, "The brute!" and the "The monster!" at
+intervals, looking the while into the deep blue eyes of Mrs. Chiffield,
+which sparkled with tears. "If he had but been the lucky man!" he
+thought. But it suddenly occurred to Matthew that these thoughts were a
+little irregular; and, besides, he had a fresh recollection of the
+troubles from which Fayette Overtop had not yet emerged. He therefore
+pulled out his watch, and informed Mr. Whedell that thirteen of the
+fifteen minutes were consumed. The creditors were beginning to pace
+heavily in the entry.
+
+Mr. Whedell, taking the hint, came down to business. His affairs were of
+a kind that were easily settled. He owned nothing except his personal
+clothing, and a few small articles of furniture. Everything else had
+been obtained on credit, and either not paid for, or only partly paid
+for. This statement of affairs occupied one minute.
+
+A minute remained, which Mr. Whedell put to good use. He looked
+appealingly at Maltboy. So did Mrs. Chiffield.
+
+"My dear friend," said Mr. Whedell, "I find myself, at an advanced
+period of life, in this cold world, deserted, penniless. You are the
+only person living that I can call by the sacred name of friend. I have
+already experienced your noble bounty in a loan of two hundred
+dollars." (Tramps of creditors becoming louder outside.) "In a word,
+sir, can you lend me one hundred dollars more? It will at least save me
+from the self-destruction which I had contemplated."
+
+At the word "self-destruction," Mrs. Chiffield cried aloud, and threw
+herself on her parent's breast, with a fresh flood of tears.
+
+These tears swept away the last trace of Matthew's prudence. He whipped
+out his pocket book, and delivered over five twenty-dollar gold pieces
+to Mr. Whedell. The sight of those beautiful coins seemed to reconcile
+the wretched man to life.
+
+Mr. Whedell was about to thank his preserver most profusely, and Mrs.
+Chiffield to burst into a new torrent, when Matthew, to avoid these
+demonstrations, rose, opened the door, and let in the pack of hungry
+creditors.
+
+Now Matthew had, in these fleeting fifteen minutes, thought up no plan
+of settlement. Being taken aback by the sudden reappearance of the
+creditors, he did not know what to propose.
+
+"Everything fixed, I s'pose?" said Rickarts, the shoemaker.
+
+When Matthew was in strong doubt what to do in any case, it was his
+invariable custom to postpone. "I think," he feebly suggested, "that we
+had better postpone final action, say till three P.M. It would give
+us time--"
+
+"Can't come it!" "No go!" "Now, or never!" were some of the exclamations
+which went up from the excited crowd.
+
+Matthew was too good natured to quarrel with these insinuations. "My
+friends," said he, "as you appear to have unlimited confidence in each
+other, suppose you appoint a committee to dispose of this property,
+which my client generously" (cries of "Oh! oh!") "turns over to you, and
+divide the proceeds among yourselves _pro rata_"
+
+The creditors looked at each other suspiciously. A want of that
+childlike trust which, in a perfect state of society should exist
+between man and man, was unhappily too apparent.
+
+Just then, when Matthew was at his wits' end, the police man who guarded
+the front door entered the room, and delivered a note to Mr. Whedell.
+That gentleman perused it languidly, and passed it to Matthew.
+
+"Good news," said he. "Mr. Abernuckle, the owner of these premises, who
+was intending to move in to-day, writes that he will not be able to take
+possession until noon to-morrow. Therefore, I say, let the creditors
+employ an auctioneer, hang out the red flag, sell, and divide, before
+that period arrives."
+
+The large creditors were silent--Quigg veiling his dissatisfaction under
+a look of complete misanthropy--but the small ones, headed by Rickarts,
+the shoemaker, highly commended it.
+
+"Besides," added a butter man, who had originally been in the
+mock-auction line, "don't ye see, we can all stay at the auction, and
+kind o' bid on the things. Hey?" The butter man nodded at the lesser
+creditors.
+
+The idea took; only a few of the larger creditors holding out against
+it.
+
+"My friends," again observed Matthew, drawing on his stores of legal
+knowledge, "you seem to forget that, if my client chose to resist your
+claims, he could retain a large amount of furniture as household
+articles under the law, which exempts certain necessary things. But,
+with rare magnanimity, he gives up all."
+
+The allusion to magnanimity produced some derisive laughs, which
+slightly nettled Matthew.
+
+"Auction it off," said he, "or we throw ourselves back on our reserved
+rights."
+
+At this hint, everybody gave in; and a committee, consisting of Quigg,
+Rickarts, and the butter man, was appointed to make all the arrangements
+for an immediate sale.
+
+It is not pleasant to pursue this painful theme--the decline and fall
+of the Whedell household--farther. Let the historian barely record, that
+the sale attracted a large crowd, and that, by the ingenious side bids
+of the creditors, the furniture was run up to twice its original value
+(no uncommon thing at auctions); that the creditors, large and small,
+were well satisfied with the results; that Mr. Whedell and daughter
+moved to Boston, and became stipendiaries upon a younger brother, who
+had made a fortune in the upholstery business, and whom Mr. Whedell had
+always despised; that Mr. Chiffield took to drink tenaciously in
+consequence of his misfortunes, and never saw or sought after his wife
+from the day when he discovered that she was dowerless; that Mrs.
+Chiffield obtained a divorce from the bonds of matrimony, but had not
+married again at last accounts; and that Matthew Maltboy, Esq., on
+looking over the whole episode of his acquaintance with the Whedells
+thanked his stars that he had got out of their entanglements on the
+reasonable terms of three hundred dollars.
+
+
+
+BOOK ELEVENTH.
+
+DISCOVERIES.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE OLD HOUSE REVISITED.
+
+In the month that followed the acquittal of Marcus Wilkeson, three real
+murders, a railway collision killing thirty persons, and a steamboat
+explosion almost as tragical in its results, occurred. The Minford
+affair was already getting old. Public curiosity, except in the
+immediate neighborhood of the house, no longer exercised itself upon the
+problem which all of Coroner Bullfast's powers of analysis had failed
+to solve.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson might have derived a selfish consolation from the fact
+that other mysteries and calamities were causing his name, which last
+month was on the tongue of the whole town, to be forgotten. But he had a
+nobler and truer source of consolation in his dear books. In the
+presence of the philosophers, and sages, and historians, and novelists,
+and poets, and wits, the men of genius of the past, chroniclers of the
+loss of empires, grave men who taught the vanity of life, and funny men
+who taught the same lesson in a different way, Marcus felt his pack of
+sorrows considerably lightening. His first, last, only disappointment in
+love had subsided into a gentle and not disagreeable melancholy. His
+trial, and the dreadful notoriety which his name had acquired, had
+imparted to his mild nature a gentle tinge of cynicism, which
+improved him.
+
+Marcus was sitting, one morning, in the little back parlor, idly
+turning over the leaves of an old folio, and looking with a half eye
+through the closed window at the houses opposite, and thinking what a
+deal of trouble it was possible to extract from a single block of
+buildings, when a slight rap was heard at the door. Simultaneously, the
+door was pushed open, and Wesley Tiffles shot in.
+
+He had brought all his tonical properties with him. Good nature and
+cheerfulness effervesced from his face. Through the trial, and since the
+acquittal, Wesley Tiffles had stuck to Marcus. Twice, often three times
+a day, he called, and was always welcomed by Marcus, and not
+inhospitably received by Miss Philomela Wilkeson. The interviews between
+that lady and the romantic speculator usually took place, quite by
+accident, in the entry, on the arrival or the departure of Mr. Tiffles;
+but, as it happened, not with the cognizance of Marcus.
+
+On one occasion--at the edge of evening--Marcus went into the entry a
+few minutes after Tiffles had left the room, and saw that gentleman and
+Philomela standing in the doorway. Tiffles appeared to be in the act of
+raising the lady's hand to kiss it; but, if that were his intention, he
+abandoned it on seeing Marcus, and shook the attenuated fingers instead.
+Then he coughed, and, saying "Good-night," went down the steps, as if he
+had not seen Marcus in the gloom. Miss Wilkeson coughed also (why do
+people always cough?), and, turning to her approaching brother, said it
+was a cool night, which was not true, as the night was agreeably warm.
+Marcus had never afterward seen them together, and had forgotten this
+slightly mysterious circumstance. Wesley Tiffles had, as usual,
+something enlivening to tell.
+
+"Got the funniest piece of news for you, my dear fellow!" said he.
+
+"Anything funny is always welcome, Tiffles," said he, closing his folio,
+that he might not appear to obstruct his friend's jocosity.
+
+"I've heard from that infernal old panorama--when I say infernal, of
+course I don't mean to imply that it wasn't a splendid idea, if I had
+had capital enough to see it through--and what do you s'pose the
+landlord and the other creditor have done with it? You couldn't guess
+in a month."
+
+"Well, what?" asked Marcus Wilkeson, laughing in anticipation.
+
+"Ha! ha! cut it up, and sold it for window curtains. A friend of mine,
+who passed through there the other day, says there's a picture of a
+lion, or a palm tree, or a slice of a desert--principally desert--hung
+up in every other window. And the best of it is, that they made a good
+thing of it. The curtains brought at least twice what I owed them. Great
+heavens! why didn't I think of it myself?"
+
+"Of what?"
+
+"Why, to cut up the panorama into window curtains, when Patching had
+finished it, and--ha! ha!--peddle them through the country. By Jupiter!
+that speculation may be worth trying yet. But at present I have my new
+patent process for----"
+
+Marcus coughed, and opened the book. Tiffles accepted the delicate hint
+in a spirit of true friendship, and let his new patent process drop.
+
+"Marcus," said he, "I don't wish to revive an unpleasant subject; but
+have you no idea what the late Mr. Minford was trying to invent?"
+
+"Not the least. I never trouble myself about inventions, as you well
+know, who are full of them. Besides, poor Mr. Minford was not
+communicative on that subject. He kept the secret even from his
+daughter."
+
+"You have a claim on the apparatus, whatever it is."
+
+"Yes. Mr. Minford insisted on giving me a paper to that effect, as
+security for two loans of five hundred dollars each. I took it to please
+the old gentleman." Marcus felt like groaning, as he thought of the
+sorrows that he had derived from his connection with the Minford family;
+but he had just been reading of the consolations of philosophy, and he
+stifled the rising weakness.
+
+"I have thought, Marcus, that there might be something about that
+unfinished machine that could be patented for the benefit of Miss
+Minford. You know I am a good judge of patentable things."
+
+"What do you propose, then?" asked Marcus, concealing, with an effort,
+the emotions which the mention of Miss Minford always caused."
+
+"That we go to the house together. The legal claim which you hold upon
+the machine entitles you to see it, if only to ascertain that it has not
+been stolen."
+
+"The visit you propose is a disagreeable one; but if you think there is
+a possibility of benefiting Miss Minford, I will go. Not that she is
+likely to be in want, however, at present, for I understand that a
+wealthy lady, Mrs. Crull, who befriended her at the inquest, you
+remember, has taken her to her own house."
+
+Without further words--for Marcus retained his old business habit of
+forming his conclusions suddenly, and adhering to them--the friends
+proceeded to the late residence of Mr. Minford.
+
+Marcus had not yet philosophically conquered his dread of recognition in
+the street as the man who had been suspected of a murder. He buttoned
+his overcoat up to his chin, pulled his hat over his brow, and walked
+fast. As he had purposely altered his style of dress since the inquest,
+he was not readily identified. But he was sympathetically conscious that
+several persons whom he passed, and who glanced at him, knew him, and
+that he was pointed out to others when his back was turned.
+
+Reaching the house, they hurried up stairs, hoping to run the gauntlet
+of the three floors in safety. Luckily, there had been a general move
+from the premises--the lodgings being less desirable since the supposed
+murder. The faces which thrust themselves out of the doorways as the two
+visitors passed, were strange ones.
+
+Marcus felt his heart palpitating, and his face growing pale, as they
+ascended the last flight of stairs, at the head of which were the room
+and the mystery. The lodgings had not been taken. The rent had been paid
+by Mr. Minford up to the 1st of May; and no person had been sufficiently
+charmed with the apartments to hire them since that date.
+
+Upon the door was a placard, announcing that the key could be obtained
+by application to the floor below. Tiffles went for it, and returned
+accompanied by an old woman, who looked as if she knew a great deal
+which she did not care to tell. She had been requested by the landlord
+to show the apartments to applicants, but not to whisper a word about
+the murder; and she was almost bursting with her great secret. While the
+old woman was wondering how much longer she would be able to hold in,
+Marcus and Tiffles entered the front room, and quietly closed the door
+in her face. The old woman grumbled at this discourtesy but, as she had
+a superstitious objection to putting her foot in a room where a murder
+had been committed, she leaned against the banisters of the stairs, and
+waited for the visitors' reappearance.
+
+The room looked just as it did on the day of the inquest. The faded and
+worn furniture was all there; the yellow curtains still covered the
+windows; the clock still hung against the wall, tickless. Marcus's eyes
+glanced restlessly about the room for a moment, not daring to look at
+the spot where the old man had received his death blow. But an
+inevitable magnetism soon brought his eyes to it, and his heart was
+lightened as he saw that the blood stains had been carefully wiped out.
+
+The door of the adjoining room--the maiden's bedchamber--was ajar.
+Marcus pushed it open with that slow motion which is a token of delicacy
+and respect. The general appearance of the room was unchanged, as well
+as Marcus could recollect from the occasional glimpses of it which he
+had formerly stolen. The little row of dresses which hung on pegs in a
+corner, and a few simple ornaments, might have been removed, but nothing
+more. Marcus felt that he was intruding here, and he closed the door.
+
+In the mean time, Wesley Tiffles had been examining the mysterious
+machine, which stood undisturbed in its corner, with the protecting
+screen still standing before it. Tiffles had first wiped off the dust,
+and then looked into it, and through it, and over it, and under it, with
+an eye that was predetermined to pry out a secret. Then he felt of every
+wheel, lever, cam, ratchet, drum, and other portion within reach of his
+fingers. Everything was immovable. Then he stood aloof from the machine,
+folded his arms, pursed up his lips, and cocked an eye at it, as if, by
+the mere force of intellect, he would compel the dumb thing to give up
+its mystery.
+
+As Tiffles was applying this species of exorcism in vain, Marcus came to
+his assistance.
+
+"What on earth can it be?" exclaimed Tiffles. "Not a new kind of steam
+engine; or an electrical apparatus; or a clock; or a sewing machine; or
+anything for spinning, carding, or weaving--nothing that is adapted to
+any useful labor. These heavy weights, that have fallen on the floor,
+would give the works a kind of jerky motion for a few seconds, while the
+weights were descending. Nothing more. But the ultimate purpose of the
+machine is a puzzler."
+
+"Mr. Minford always said that it was something that would revolutionize
+the world of industry--that it was a new mechanical principle of
+universal application."
+
+Tiffles laughed a little. "Excuse my levity," said he, "but
+inventors--and I am one of them, you know--always claim that they are
+about to revolutionize the world of industry. I never knew one of them
+to claim less than that for a patent flytrap or an improved sausage
+stuffer. Mr. Minford was a man of genius, I dare say, but he probably
+overestimated the importance of his invention. Have you any objection to
+my prying the thing apart at this opening? I want to inspect some of the
+works that are partly concealed. I pledge myself to put it together
+again as good as new."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+A POSTHUMOUS SECRET.
+
+"Go ahead," said Marcus; and Tiffles, inserting his walking stick in a
+wide gap between two cog wheels, forced the strange machine apart. A
+large brass drum upon which a small chain was loosely coiled, fell to
+the floor. The other portions were not disturbed. Marcus picked up the
+drum; and Tiffles cast his unerring eye in among the new jumble of
+wheels and connecting levers that was brought to view.
+
+"Can't make head or tail of it," said he, at length. "Let me see that
+drum."
+
+Marcus handed it to him. Tiffles took it, like an expert, between a
+thumb and finger, and tapped it with his stick. It answered back with a
+muffled clink.
+
+"It is hollow, and contains some soft non-metallic substance. Ah! here
+we have it." And Tiffles, unscrewing a nicely fitting cap from the drum,
+drew out a close roll of paper. He unfolded it with trembling fingers.
+
+The upper portion of the paper was covered with neatly drawn diagrams,
+which bore some semblance to the machine. Beneath, in the fine
+copperplate hand of the inventor, were these memorable words:
+
+"_Eliphalet Minford's original plan of_ PERPETUAL MOTION, _to which he
+has devoted his fortune, and twenty years of labor. Perseverantia
+vincit omnia_."
+
+"_Christmas Day_, 185-."
+
+Then followed a careful technical description of the plan, and a mention
+of the fact that on two occasions the machine had moved. One occasion
+was the night of April 10, 184-, when the mass of wheels started with a
+sudden click, but stopped in three seconds by the clock. The other
+occasion was daybreak, December 30, 185-, when the works began to move
+of their own accord, and did not stop for six seconds. This record had
+evidently been made by the inventor for his private reference, and
+concealed in the brass drum for safe keeping.
+
+Tiffles read with bated breath; and Marcus listened in astonishment.
+
+"What do you think of it?" asked Marcus.
+
+"I think," replied Tiffles, "with every respect for the memory of the
+inventor, that he was insane. Perpetual motion, without an exhaustive
+power--or, in other words, the eternal motion of a thing by its own
+inherent properties--is a simple impossibility. To cite familiar
+illustrations of its absurdity, you might as well try to lift yourself
+by the straps of your boots, or pour a quart into a pint pot. I wasted
+six months on perpetual motion when I was a boy, and gave it up. Every
+inventive genius bothers his head with this nonsensical problem, till he
+learns that he is a fool. Of course, I say this with every possible
+regard for your deceased friend. He was insane on this point--_quoad
+hoc_, as the lawyers have it--without question, or he would not have
+thrown away twenty years on it;--or twenty-three years, I should say,
+since the paper is dated, you observe, three years ago."
+
+"But Mr. Minford says, in that document, that the machine moved twice.
+He could have no object in deceiving himself."
+
+"You are wrong there, my friend. Inventors are continually deceiving
+themselves. Their judgment, their very eyesight becomes worthless in
+respect to subjects upon which they have labored long and hoped
+ardently. This machine has evidently been greatly altered from the
+original plan in the progress of its construction. You observe that
+these weights do not appear on the diagrams. They were an
+afterthought--recently put on, I should judge, from the appearance of
+the cords which hold them. Anybody can see, as I said before, that the
+weights would move the works spasmodically, so to speak. But this motion
+cannot be what he alludes to as having taken place on two occasions. Of
+course, I can't explain what caused the motion on those occasions--if it
+were a real motion, and not a fantasy of the inventor's brain--but I'll
+bet my life that any intelligent mechanic could have fully explained it
+to Mr. Minford at the time. But, mark you, Mr. Minford would never have
+accepted the explanation. Inventors never take advice."
+
+"So then you are satisfied that this machine is of no value--to Miss
+Minford--except for old brass?"
+
+"Oh! I don't say that. Mr. Minford, aside from this absurd crotchet, may
+have possessed real mechanical genius. Let me see if some part of it may
+not be good for something besides perpetual motion."
+
+Wesley Tiffles peered down among the brazen and steel complexities
+again. "Sure enough, here it is," said he; "a splendid window fastener."
+
+"I don't see any window fastener," exclaimed Marcus, looking in the
+direction of his friend's forefinger.
+
+"There--that cam with a small spring and lever attached. Strength and
+simplicity combined. I have studied the subject of window fasteners--in
+fact, have invented three or four, which possessed the extraordinary
+property of never letting the window up or down when you wanted to move
+it. I recognize, in this window fastener, my ideal. Marcus, you must
+patent it for Miss Minford. It will be a sure fortune to her. I'll make
+the drawings and specifications."
+
+Marcus, sadly happy in the thought of rendering any service to that
+young lady, readily chimed in with Tiffles's views, and said that the
+patent should be obtained as soon as might be.
+
+It was then agreed that Tiffles should call on Mrs. Crull, on the
+following day, and inform Miss Minford of the important discoveries
+which had been made by him--not mentioning the name of Marcus
+Wilkeson--and should also offer to remove and dispose of the neglected
+furniture, as the young lady might think best.
+
+As this conclusion was arrived at, the door opened suddenly. The old
+lady, being apprehensive, from the long stay of the two visitors, that
+they were ransacking the rooms and hiding portable articles about their
+persons, had overcome her superstitious antipathy, and opened the door
+quickly, so that she might catch them in the act. But they were only
+standing in the middle of the room, earnestly talking to each other.
+
+The old lady muttered an inaudible apology; and the two friends hastened
+to take their departure.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+OVERTOP FINDS A SENSIBLE WOMAN.
+
+Next morning, Mr. Wesley Tiffles, after an inexpensive breakfast at a
+cheap restaurant in Chatham street, set out on his mission of goodness.
+He was reduced to his last dollar, but felt opulent in the possession of
+his diamond breastpin--that tower of moral strength to the borrower. He
+whistled as he walked, and thought what would be the best name for the
+new patent window fastener of the future. "Union," "American,"
+"Columbian," "Peoples'," "Washington," "Ne Plus Ultra," and a score
+more, were turned over and rejected. Finally he settled upon the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener," meaning that its destined field of
+usefulness was the whole civilized globe. Patents for it could be and
+should be obtained in England, France, Germany, Russia, and Spain.
+
+While Wesley Tiffles was taking this rosy view of the "Cosmopolitan
+Window Fastener," he stumbled upon Fayette Overtop, Esq., who was
+walking briskly toward his office, and thinking over a hard case in
+which his services had been secured the day before.
+
+The firm of Overtop & Maltboy had recently come into a small but paying
+business, in this way: The release of Marcus Wilkeson was generally
+supposed to have been effected, not by his innocence, but by the skilful
+and professional, but unprincipled efforts of his legal advisers. Their
+name was not unfavorably known among the thieves and murderers of the
+city; and several individuals belonging to those classes of society
+resolved to employ them when they got into their next little difficulty.
+And, since the inquest, another thing had greatly contributed to the
+prosperity of the firm. We allude to the case of Slapman _vs_. Slapman.
+
+This was an action for divorce, with alimony, brought by Mrs. Grazella
+Jigbee Slapman against her husband, Ferdinand P. Slapman. The ground
+upon which the separation was sought, was the continual brutality of Mr.
+Slapman toward his wife.
+
+It was the law and the custom, in cases where both parties to the action
+were agreed to that arrangement, to turn over this species of litigation
+to a referee, who took the testimony in private, heard arguments of
+counsel, and rendered a decision subject to the confirmation of the
+Supreme Court. The Court had issued a standing order prohibiting all
+persons from publishing (except with the consent of the parties to the
+action) any further reports of the cases than a simple announcement of
+the decree, as confirmed by the Court, for or against a divorce. This
+order was put forth to protect the public from the contaminating example
+of matrimonial infelicities; though we are not aware that the number of
+divorce cases has materially decreased, or the standard of public
+morality been greatly elevated in consequence thereof.
+
+The case of Slapman _vs_. Slapman was on trial before a referee, by
+mutual agreement of the parties. The newspapers did not report it; but
+some of them kept hinting at it in an appetizing way. The gentleman
+whose "gallantry, &c.," was the "remote cause of the action," was
+described as "a rising young lawyer, who distinguished himself in a
+recent inquest before Coroner ----, the thrilling particulars of which
+are still fresh in the minds of our readers;" or as a "young ornament of
+the legal profession, whose office was not a hundred miles from the
+corner of Broadway and ---- street" (the precise location of his
+office). One paper went so far as to say, that the "triumph which this
+disciple of Coke had achieved in the late _cause celebre_, was only to
+be equalled by his invariable success in affairs of the heart, &c., &c."
+
+All this caused Fayette Overtop's name to be known by thousands of
+people. Persons who were seeking divorces, reasoned, strangely enough,
+that a man whose "gallantry, &c.," was the cause of a divorce, could
+materially assist them in severing the matrimonial bonds. Therefore they
+began to flock to him. He already had five female and two male clients
+of this description.
+
+When Tiffles stumbled against Fayette Overtop, he at once invited his
+friend to go with him to Mrs. Crull's. His legal knowledge (of which
+Tiffles, in common with the public, was beginning to have a high
+opinion) might be of some service. Overtop had been told by Marcus
+Wilkeson of the previous day's transactions, and of Wesley Tiffles's
+intended visit to Miss Minford; and he at once consented to
+accompany him.
+
+On their way to Mrs. Crull's--whose residence had been ascertained from
+the Directory--they passed Miss Pillbody's select school. Tiffles
+suggested that it would be well to call on that young lady, and pick up
+some intelligence of Miss Minford. She might still be receiving lessons
+from Miss Pillbody; and might, possibly, be in the house at that moment.
+Overtop also thought it would not be a bad idea to call there. He had
+heard much from Marcus Wilkeson in praise of Miss Pillbody, especially
+of her sensible qualities. Being still in the active pursuit of a
+sensible woman, he was moved with a real curiosity to see her.
+
+The servant showed the two callers to the speckless little front parlor;
+and, a minute afterward, Miss Pillbody, looking fresh and neat, her
+narrow collar white and smooth, and every hair of her heavy brown
+tresses in its place, made her appearance.
+
+Miss Pillbody entered the room in that noiseless, sliding way, which
+indicates a constitutional diffidence. Her eyelids involuntarily
+contracted, so that she might see her callers on a near approach to
+them. Fayette Overtop, marking her modest demeanor and her
+short-sightedness, immediately announced his name and that of his
+companion, and the object of their visit.
+
+At the mention of his name, Miss Pillbody started. She had heard of
+Fayette Overtop, Esq., through the newspapers, as counsel for Marcus
+Wilkeson; but not as the philosophic friend of Mrs. Slapman. In reply to
+questions about Miss Minford, she stated that that interesting young
+pupil had not taken lessons from her since the death of her father.
+
+Miss Pillbody here indulged in a little artifice. She produced a
+memorandum book, to see when Miss Minford took her last lesson; and, in
+order that she might read distinctly, drew out her eyeglasses, and
+adjusted them with a graceful movement of the arm and hand. Overtop
+thought that she handled the eyeglasses in a most ladylike manner; and
+that, when they were astride of her shapely nose, they became her face
+wonderfully.
+
+When Miss Pillbody had referred to the little memorandum book, she gave
+one short look at Fayette Overtop. That gentleman, conscious that his
+face was scrutinized, looked at the wall. Miss Pillbody stole but one
+glance, and then shut the eyeglasses prettily, and stuck them into an
+invisible pocket of her waist. She had come to the conclusion that Mr.
+Overtop was a person of dignified and intelligent appearance. And Mr.
+Overtop had settled into the opinion that Miss Pillbody was a near
+approach to that imagined paragon--a sensible woman.
+
+Mr. Overtop was about to make a shrewd remark upon the great superiority
+of private select schools over all public institutions for the education
+of young ladies, when Miss Pillbody rose.
+
+"Do you desire any other information, gentlemen?" said she.
+
+"No, I thank you, Miss Pillbody," returned Overtop, who interpreted her
+question to mean that a pupil was waiting for her somewhere--which was
+true; for Mrs. Gipscon, a fat lady of forty-eight, was taking her
+second grammar lesson in the back parlor.
+
+The two callers seized their hats.
+
+"Could I intrust you with a message for Miss Minford, Mr. Overtop?"
+
+"With a thousand," said that gallant man.
+
+"Please, then, give my love to her, and ask her to come round and see
+me."
+
+Mr. Overtop would have said that he always found it difficult to carry a
+lady's love to another without keeping some himself; but then he thought
+that this might be a little bold for a stray caller. So he answered,
+"With pleasure."
+
+The two visitors bowed, and Miss Pillbody bent her head gracefully
+toward Mr. Overtop.
+
+"What do you think of the schoolmarm?" asked Tiffles, when they had got
+into the street.
+
+Overtop did not like the phrase "schoolmarm." "I think Miss Pillbody,"
+said he, "is--a sensible woman."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+INNOCENCE ON A SLIPPERY ROAD.
+
+Walking with the nervous and unreasonable quickness of city men, they
+soon arrived at Mrs. Grail's. The good lady was sitting at one of her
+front windows, sewing. As she looked into the street, her face was seen
+to have a sad and thoughtful expression. She came to the door in
+response to a sharp ring by Wesley Tiffles, who was tentative of
+bellpulls. Mrs. Crull kept two servants, but she could never get over
+the impulse to answer the door, when she was near it.
+
+Overtop explained that they were desirous of seeing Miss Minford on
+important business.
+
+"The poor, dear child!" exclaimed Mrs. Crull, in a broken voice. "She is
+not here."
+
+"Not here!" cried Overtop. "Where is she, then?"
+
+"I don't know, sir; and that's what troubles me so." Here the good Mrs.
+Crull began to twitch about the mouth. But she did not cry. She had too
+much of the masculine element for that. Her whole life was a struggle
+between the weakness of her feminine body and the strong self-control of
+her manly soul, in which the latter, after an effort, always came
+out victor.
+
+Mrs. Crull then proceeded to explain, a little incoherently, that she
+had taken Miss Minford to her house, the day after the murder, and had
+asked the poor child to live with her, to be her adopted daughter. Miss
+Minford had gladly accepted the offer, and had stayed there until
+yesterday. During the last two or three days, she had noticed that Miss
+Minford, or Pet, as she always called her, was worried about something.
+She would not tell Mrs. Crull what was the matter, but Mrs. Crull
+somehow guessed that it was a love affair. She remembered the handsome,
+dissipated young man at the inquest, and she had seen him standing at
+the corner below her house, only two days before Miss Minford left.
+
+"Left!" exclaimed Overtop, jumping at a conclusion. "Then that villain
+has abducted and ruined her."
+
+"It's bad enough, I fear," continued Mrs. Crull; "but perhaps not so bad
+as that 'ere. Anyhow, I hopes not. I spoke to Pet about that young man,
+and she looked as innocent as a spring lamb at me, though she kind o'
+blushed when she denied having met him since the trial. And, to do her
+justice, I don't think she had met him then, though I sort o' suspeck
+she seen him from the window two or three times--she had a habit of
+looking out o' the window--and that he contrived to have a talk with her
+somewhere and somehow, the day before she went away. And I think he must
+have had the cheek to come into this very room" (Mrs. Crull had shown
+her visitors into her front parlor), "because one o' my servants says
+that she heerd a strange voice in the entry, and the door shut as if
+somebody had gone out. When she come into the entry to see who it was,
+she saw Pet hurrying into the parlor, and heerd her humming a tune. Pet
+wasn't in the habit of humming tunes; and, the servant thought that
+rather 'spicious. So do I--not of any wrong, mind you. I wouldn't
+believe that till it was proved. But, to make a long story short, here
+is the note that poor Pet left on my dressin' table. Read it. I--I
+haven't got my spectacles."
+
+The truth was, that Mrs. Crull's eyes were filling with tears, and she
+could not have read the now familiar lines on that little piece of paper
+even with the powerful aid of her spectacles.
+
+     Monday Evening.
+
+     DEAR MRS. CRULL:
+
+     Please pardon me for what I have done. I knew you would not
+     consent to it, and so I did not tell you. I was afraid I
+     should become a burden to you; though you are too
+     good-hearted to say so. I have a nice place, and am earning
+     my own living honestly. Do not try to find me, but believe I
+     will always be good, and worthy of your love, and, some day,
+     will repay you for all your kindness.
+
+     With love and respect,
+
+     PATTY MINFORD.
+
+"A very strange note!" murmured Overtop. "Young girls are not apt to
+complain of being burdens, or to take such misanthropic views of life.
+There is a man's hand in this. That wretch, Van Quintem, jr., without a
+doubt. Did you never warn Miss Minford against him?"
+
+"Once," said Mrs. Crull, with a faint choke in her voice. "I had noticed
+his glances toward her at the inquest, and I told her he was a bad young
+man, and she must not allow him to speak to her in the street, and that,
+if he should come to my house to see her, I should shut the door in
+his face."
+
+"And what did she say to that?"
+
+"She said all she knew about him was, that he had saved her life once.
+She couldn't forget that. Then I showed her how improper it was in him
+to hide his own name from her, and what horrid holes these gambling
+dens was which he goes to. I also p'inted out how unfeelin' his conduct
+was to his poor old father."
+
+"And what did she say to all that?"
+
+"She nodded her head, and said, 'Yes, so it was;' but I see, now, that
+all my talk didn't make no impression on her."
+
+"The sum of it is," said Overtop, "that she loves this worthless
+vagabond, and knew that you would not permit his visits to your house.
+Therefore she has left you."
+
+Mrs. Crull was a woman of firmness as well as affection. She regretted
+that her opposition to this young man should have been the means of
+driving Pet away. But she knew that she had done what any prudent mother
+would have done for her own child.
+
+"I'm sorry it has come to this," said she; "but I did it all for the
+best, Heaven knows. Gen'lemen, we must find this child. But how?"
+
+Tiffles, being a man of infinite expedients, and accustomed to solve
+problems for himself, and everybody else, at the shortest notice,
+answered at once:
+
+"_Not_ by advertising for her, or putting the police on her track. Young
+Van Quintem would take the alarm, and move her out of town. She will go
+anywhere with him, if I mistake not, until she finds him out better.
+Have you no clue to her whereabouts; or can you think of any one that
+could give us any information?"
+
+Mrs. Crull reflected. "Unless I am much mistaken," said she, "I saw that
+tall, clean-looking boy, Bog, I believe they call him--you remember him
+at the inquest--walking on t'other side o' the street, two or three
+times since Pet come to live with me. He looked sideways and kind o'
+sheepish at the house as he passed. I've a notion that he was a lover of
+Pet's, too."
+
+"He's the man, or boy, for us!" cried Tiffles. "Is in the bill-posting
+business, and knows the town better than I do, if anything. A shrewd
+fellow, judging from his looks; and, if he's in love with Miss Minford,
+then he's sure never to tire of hunting her up. He must disguise
+himself, and find young Van Quintem, and follow him day and night, till
+he brings up at Miss Minford. That's the shortest road. When Miss
+Minford has been found, then we will consider what is to be done next."
+
+Mrs. Crull and Overtop at once approved of this plan, and no time was
+lost in putting it into execution.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+BOG'S OPEN SESAME.
+
+Bog was easily found, and gladly consented to do the work allotted to
+him. It was agreed that he should conduct the search alone, and in his
+own way; but that, after he had succeeded in tracing Miss Minford to her
+place of concealment, he should send word, without delay, to Mrs. Crull,
+and also to old Van Quintem, whose advice upon the subject had been
+obtained. It was thought that the reasoning and entreaties of the two
+together would win back the poor girl from the path of danger which she
+was unconsciously treading.
+
+Bog disguised himself by putting on his old, discarded working clothes;
+and, as he looked at his reflection in the glass, thought how much truth
+there was in the maxim, that "fine feathers make fine birds."
+
+"Go, my good boy," old Van Quintem had said to him, in faltering
+accents; "go among the gambling houses, and other dens of infamy, and
+you will surely hear of my son."
+
+Acting on this advice--which confirmed his own opinion--Bog proceeded to
+visit the gambling houses on Broadway. Child of the city as he was, he
+knew the locations of them all. His constant travels about town, day and
+night, had made him a master of all this knowledge, and much more of the
+sort, which is only useful when, as in the case of this poor orphan
+boy, it serves to show where evil must be avoided, not sought. Thus the
+pilot, taking his vessel through Hellgate, profits by his knowledge of
+the rocks and the shallows, to steer clear of all dangers, and come
+safely into port.
+
+Bog, before leaving his shop, had been provided with this decoy note,
+written by the ingenious Wesley Tiffles in cunning imitation of Miss
+Minford's handwriting. The long, elegant curves, and all the delicate
+peculiarities of her chirography, taught by Miss Pillbody, had been
+copied from the sample furnished by her note to Mrs. Crull. It ran
+as follows:
+
+     MR. VAN QUINTEM:
+
+     DEAR SIR: Come to me at once, for I am in trouble.
+
+     PET.
+
+The plan (Bog's contrivance all this) was to inquire at the gambling
+houses where Mr. Van Quintem, jr., was most likely to be, and, when he
+was found, to send this note in to him by a servant. Bog, having
+delivered the note, was to withdraw to the sidewalk, lie in ambush, till
+young Van Quintem came out, and then follow him to Miss Minford's
+retreat. There he was to wait, and send a swift messenger to Mrs. Crull
+and old Van Quintem. It was not known that young Van Quintem had ever
+seen Miss Minford's handwriting; but, to make the game sure, the note
+had been written with a skill worthy of a counterfeiter, or that most
+dexterous of penmen, young Van Quintem himself.
+
+Bog commenced operations about three o'clock in the afternoon--the hour
+when the gambler and debauchee, who have been up all the previous night,
+are ready to begin their feverish life again.
+
+He first visited a snug establishment near the lower end of Broadway. It
+was situated in the second story, over a nominal exchange office, and
+was the favorite resort of down-town brokers, who, having gambled on
+Wall street till the close of business hours, dropped in to flirt with
+Fortune an hour or two before going home to dinner. Sometimes their
+hour or two was protracted to six o'clock next morning, when they
+staggered home to breakfast and a curtain lecture together. This Temple
+of Faro was never impertinently molested by the police; and it was a
+subject of remark, among people who thought they had been robbed there,
+that there was never a policeman within sight of the door.
+
+In the hallway of the second story occupied by this gambling saloon,
+were a number of doors, which the experienced eye of the boy at once
+decided to be blinds, or, in other words, no doors at all, but only
+imitations. The appearance of the second story was that of a suite of
+unoccupied offices. Whoever rapped at these blind doors, could obtain no
+admission.
+
+At the end of the hallway, Bog came upon a long window, which was
+painted white on the inside. He saw, by a glance at the grooves of the
+lower sash, that it was often raised. There was a boot-worn hollow on
+the floor beneath the window. The unusual length of the lower sash, and
+the nearness of the sill to the floor, would permit persons to step into
+the room easily when the window was raised.
+
+Bog rapped thrice at this window. He had a vague idea--derived from
+reading, perhaps--that three raps were an open sesame to mysterious
+rooms the world over. The last rap had not ceased to vibrate on the pane
+of glass, when the window was suddenly shoved up, as if by somebody
+waiting on the other side.
+
+A negro of intense blackness stood revealed. He took a hasty inventory
+of Bog's old clothes, and then said, "Clare out, now!" He commenced to
+close the window.
+
+"I was told to give you a half dollar," said Bog, bethinking himself of
+a powerful expedient, "if you would find out whether Mr. Van Quintem was
+here, and hand him a letter."
+
+The negro's eyes dilated, and his thick lips wreathed into a grin.
+
+"Mr. Fan Squintem--a little feller with a big black mustache? I knows
+him. Dunno wether he's in, 'L see fur ye." The negro paused. The
+interrogatory, "Where's your half dollar?" could be plainly seen in his
+great eyes.
+
+"Here it is," said Bog.
+
+The negro grinned his satisfaction, pocketed the coin, disappeared
+through another door from which there exhaled an odor of cigars and mint
+juleps, and returned, in a minute, with the intelligence, "He a'n't in,
+Mister. P'a'ps you want to leave some word for him?"
+
+Bog had no time to lose. He said, "Nothing partickler," and hurried off,
+leaving the negro to puzzle over his half dollar.
+
+At the next gambling saloon, near the junction of Broadway and Park Row,
+Bog simplified his method of operations. Before making any inquiry of
+the servant who answered his triple rap, he thrust a half dollar at him,
+and then put his question. This plan saved surly looks and explanations.
+Mr. Van Quintem was a well-known patron of the establishment, but had
+not been there for a week: which was rather strange, the man
+politely added.
+
+Bog continued his search, walking as fast as he could. In second
+stories, in third stories, in fourth stories, in the rear of ground
+floors, in one or two basements, among all the more fashionable gambling
+dens, which, at that period, lay between Fulton and Tenth streets, he
+picked his way. His new system had drawn heavily upon his stock of loose
+silver, and he had but two half dollars left. The question now was, how
+to spend them?--for Bog knew of no more resorts of gamblers on Broadway;
+and there were none on any of the side streets which a man of young Van
+Quintem's style would be likely to frequent. It was the edge of evening.
+
+The boy walked up and down between Tenth and Fourteenth streets,
+thinking what it would be best to do next. He kept a sharp lookout at
+the passers by, hoping to see the object of his search. He paused to
+rest himself a few minutes in the doorway of a photographic gallery;
+and, while there, observed two young men, with sickly complexions and
+bloodshot eyes, coming up the street. He recognized them as young men
+whom he had often seen issuing from gambling places in the small hours
+of the morning. They were talking briskly, and Bog pricked up his ears.
+
+"The very d----l's in the cards lately," said the whitest-faced of the
+two.
+
+"Luck must have a turn," said the other. "By ----" (with a horrid oath),
+"suppose we try Van's?"
+
+"Van's? Where's that?"
+
+"Why, the concern just opened on the corner above. The biggest kind of
+suppers there, they say."
+
+"All right," said the other, wearily. "We'll try Van's."
+
+Van is a common prefix of names in New York; but Bog needed no further
+assurance that this Van belonged to Quintem. The opening of a new
+gambling saloon under his name (with some wealthy backer furnishing the
+capital, as is usually the case) would explain why young Van Quintem had
+not been seen at any of his old haunts on Broadway for a fortnight past.
+
+Bog followed his guides at a short distance. After proceeding two
+squares, they stopped in front of a stylish old mansion, and, after a
+furtive look up and down and across the street, ascended the steps, and
+opened the door. As they did so, Bog swiftly passed the house, and saw
+that a muscular servant stood within the entry, for the obvious purpose
+of preventing the intrusion of persons not wanted there. The large
+diamond breastpins and depraved faces of the two young men were their
+passports, and were _viséd_ without hesitation by the diplomatic
+attendant.
+
+Bog took a half dollar in his hand, advanced to the door, which was now
+closed, and boldly opened it.
+
+The athletic guardian of the place, being confronted with this audacious
+youth in old clothes, put on a commanding look, and said:
+
+"Well, sir, and what the d----l do you want here?"
+
+"Only to give you half a dollar, as I was told to," said Bog, "and to
+ask if Mr. Van Quintem was in. Note from a lady, sir; that's all."
+Bog winked.
+
+The servant smiled, and took the coin.
+
+"He's in," was the reply.
+
+"Then please hand this to him, and say as how it's 'mportant. No arnser
+wanted."
+
+The servant received the note, and sententiously remarked, "Consider it
+done;" whereon the boy Bog hurriedly retreated, and hid himself in a
+doorway nearly opposite. He had hardly done this, before the door of the
+house opened again, and disclosed the man whom he longed to see. The
+letter was crumpled in his hand, and his pale face betrayed agitation.
+He cast wary looks in all directions, and then descended to the
+sidewalk, and walked fast down Broadway. Bog emerged from his seclusion,
+and followed him at a distance, always keeping somebody between him and
+the object of his pursuit.
+
+At the corner of Astor Place, young Van Quintem stopped; and Bog came to
+a halt also, half a block behind.
+
+The next minute, the Eighth-street stage, going up, approached the
+corner at a rapid rate, as if the driver were hurrying home to his
+supper. There were but few persons in the stage.
+
+Young Van Quintem hailed the conveyance, jumped in before it could stop,
+and the driver whipped up his horses to an increased speed. Bog was
+tired, and he knew not how far he might have to follow the stage at a
+full trot. He resolved upon his course instantly. Turning the corner of
+Clinton Place, he ran up that side of the triangular block, and met the
+stage. He pulled his old cap farther over his eyes, to prevent the
+possibility of recognition by young Van Quintem, and, gliding swiftly
+behind the stage, when he was sure that the driver was not looking,
+hooked on to the step behind, just as he had done a thousand times when
+he was a smaller boy.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+TRACKED.
+
+Young Van Quintem sat at the farther end of the stage, absorbed in his
+own thoughts. His thin lips moved restlessly at times, as if he were
+arguing to himself. In his hand he still held the crumpled note. Twice
+he unfolded it, and read the contents carefully; then crushed it in his
+hand again. Bog watched him through the window of the stage door--not
+looking straight at him, but with that side vision with which we trace
+the outline of faint comets. He was aware that young Van Quintem looked
+at him twice suspiciously, and then settled back into his own
+meditations. Bog felt safe in his disguise--or rather his original and
+native dress.
+
+When the stage stopped to take in or let out passengers, Bog slipped
+from his perch, and hid himself from the driver's sight. Long experience
+had taught him how to render himself invisible to that vindictive
+personage.
+
+The stage rolled on to the Greenpoint ferry, dropping all its passengers
+by the way, excepting the pursued and the pursuer. It was now evident
+that young Van Quintem was going to Greenpoint.
+
+The ferry boat was not in, and would not be in, and ready to leave
+again, for ten minutes. Bog, having seen his game enter the ferry house,
+thereby conclusively proving his intention to cross the river, slipped
+into a boiler yard near the ferry. There, against a post, he scrawled
+with a stump of pencil, on the back of two playbills (which he had
+brought with him for stationery), two notes, as follows:
+
+     Tuesday Evening, about 8 o'clock.
+
+     Please come to the ferry house on the Greenpoint side, and
+     wait there till I send for you. BOG.
+
+These notes he addressed to Mr. Van Quintem, sen., and Mrs. Crull, at
+their residences. The next step was to find a boy to deliver them. Bog
+did not have to wait long for that. Boys of the ragged and city-wise
+variety may be picked up at any corner of New York at any hour of the
+day or night.
+
+Another Eighth-street stage, which came rattling toward the ferry,
+brought a fine specimen of the juvenile vagrant and dare-devil, seated
+on the step. Bog looked out of the boiler yard, and hailed him with a
+shrill whistle, formed by thrusting two fingers in the mouth, and
+blowing fiercely. The boy recognized the signal of his ragged tribe,
+slid off the seat, and came running to where Bog was standing. As he
+drew near, Bog recognized him as a trusty lad whom he had employed as
+file leader in a walking advertisement procession, several weeks before.
+
+"Wot yer want, hey?" asked this youth.
+
+"Know me?" asked Bog.
+
+"Know ye? No. Yer a'n't one of our fellers."
+
+"Look again." Bog raised his ragged cap, and smoothed his hair back.
+
+"Why, it's Mr. Bogert. Cuss me if it a'n't!"
+
+"Just so, Bill. I'm trying to catch a chap that owes me something, you
+see. He's in the ferry house there, waiting for the boat. I'm going to
+follow him to Greenpoint, and find out where he lives. Then I'll have
+him arrested. Now, there are two people I would like to have as
+witnesses, when I track him to his house. The names are written here;
+and what I want of you is, to deliver these notes to them as soon as you
+can, and tell them to come right away. Will you do it, Bill?"
+
+"Won't I, Mr. Bogert? Jest tell me the names, streets, and numbers, cos
+I can't read handwritin' very well, yer know."
+
+Bog read the addresses, and, at the same time, produced a quarter from
+his fast-diminishing stock of silver. "Take that," said he.
+
+"No yer don't!" said the eccentric youth. "You've done some good turns
+to me. Bill Fish don't forget his friends, I can tell yer. Here
+goes, now."
+
+Bill Fish snatched the notes from Bog's hand, and ran down the street
+after a stage which had just left the ferry house on its down trip. Bog
+saw him seat himself on the step, with his head well hid from the
+driver, and sent a parting whistle after him, to which Bill Fish
+responded with an enormous grin and a jerk of thumb over shoulder at his
+natural enemy on the box.
+
+"I'll give Bill Fish a good job, some day," mused Bog. "Now for the
+scoundrel."
+
+The boat had come in. Bog watched from his hiding place until he saw
+young Van Quintem step on board, and disappear in the ladies' cabin.
+Then he hastened to the ferry house, paid his fare, and entered. To
+avoid being seen by young Van Quintem, he took a seat in that repository
+of stale tobacco-smoke called the "Gentlemen's Cabin."
+
+At the Greenpoint landing, Bog watched young Van Quintem's departure
+from the boat, and stole out, taking the opposite side of the street. It
+was then quite dark, and, with reasonable precaution, there was no fear
+that the pursued would see him.
+
+The young profligate walked up the street several blocks, and turned
+into a side street, occupied by residences, with small shops and
+groceries at the corners, and occasionally at intervals between them.
+Suddenly, Bog observed him looking around, as if to be sure that he was
+not watched. Bog slipped behind a large tree. Having apparently come to
+the conclusion that nobody was observing him, young Van Quintem strode
+on rapidly a few rods farther, and then made a sharp turn into a neat
+little millinery shop, which stood quite remote from all other places
+of business.
+
+When the young man's form had disappeared, Bog ran at the top of his
+speed to a point opposite the shop, where he could readily see what was
+going on within.
+
+The door was open and a strong light from the interior shone across the
+street. There was no tree or awning post, or other object, on the
+sidewalk, behind which he could conceal himself. Exactly opposite to the
+shop, and in the full blaze of its light, was a high door shutting on a
+small alley way. Bog tried the latch, and found the door locked. With
+instant decision, he caught the top of the door, and vaulted over it,
+trusting to fortune not to be caught on the inside. Applying his eye to
+the keyhole, he observed the following condition of things:
+
+The shop was a milliner's, beyond all question. It was filled with
+articles of ladies' wear, whose names and uses were all unknown to Bog;
+while outside, in the air, dangled various patterns of skirts which had
+just then come into fashion; and the public and obtrusive exhibition of
+which is one of the singularities of our rapid civilization.
+
+Behind the counter stood one of those thin ladies who have dedicated
+themselves to the millinery and a single life. At that distance, she
+looked to Bog like a perfectly respectable woman, with a sharp eye to
+business. Farther on, toward the end of the same counter, was the angel
+of his heart, Patty Minford. Her appearance, pale, and therefore more
+touchingly beautiful than ever, threw his senses into that sweet flutter
+which is the proof and mystery of love. He repeated the vow which he had
+made to himself, and dreamed of fulfilling a thousand times, to save her
+from harm at the risk of his life. She was folding up articles on the
+counter, and packing them into little boxes, and did not look toward
+young Van Quintem. Bog thought this a good sign.
+
+The young man leaned over the counter, and addressed some words to her,
+to which her lips moved as if in reply, while her eyes were still
+downcast on her work. He then smoothed out the crumpled note which he
+had carried in his hand, and placed it before her. She started in
+amazement, as she remarked the close imitation of her handwriting; and,
+having read it, shook her head with a wondering air. Young Van Quintem's
+inexpressive face assumed a look of astonishment, and he instantly
+walked to the door, and peered up and down the street, and opposite.
+Then he nodded to Miss Minford, as if to excuse himself for a moment,
+and, darting out of the shop, walked rapidly to the street below, and
+then to the one above, passing Bog's hiding place on that side of the
+street, and causing that youth to remove his eye from the keyhole for
+fear of detection. When he had made this reconnoissance, and satisfied
+himself that there was no spy about, he returned to the shop. In the
+mean time, some pantomime had been going on between Miss Minford and the
+shopwoman, which Bog interpreted to mean that Miss Minford appealed to
+her for protection, and that the shopwoman promised it. This was
+followed by the retiring of the young lady through a door in the rear of
+the shop, and the locking of the door by her female friend, who put the
+key in her pocket.
+
+Young Van Quintem came in, and was surprised not to see Patty. The
+shopwoman explained, with a gesture, that she had gone up stairs,
+whereon he consulted his watch, and then sat down in an armchair in
+front of the counter, as if with the determination of waiting for her.
+
+Bog judged, from all the circumstances, that Miss Minford would not
+again show herself for some time; that young Van Quintem would wait, in
+the hope of seeing her; and that the shopwoman could be depended on as
+her friend to the last. He therefore concluded that he might safely
+spend time to go to the ferry house, and procure the company of old Van
+Quintem and Mrs. Crull, who had probably reached the rendezvous.
+Watching for an opportunity when the young man's back was turned, Bog
+lightly vaulted from his hiding place, and noiselessly ran down
+the street.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+FOUND AND LOST.
+
+When he arrived at the ferry house, the boat was coming in, with his
+venerable accomplices on board. Upon receiving her cue from the
+faithful Bill Fish, Mrs. Crull entered her carriage (which had been in
+readiness for her since Bog started out on his search), and was driven
+to Mr. Van Quintem's. The old gentleman, who was sitting in his study,
+with his light overcoat and hat on, prepared for any journey, took the
+spare seat in the carriage, and, in less than twenty-five minutes, by
+fast driving and the timely cooperation of the ferry boat, they were at
+the appointed spot.
+
+"Have you found her, you dear Bog?" asked Mrs. Crull, breathless.
+
+Bog answered "Yes," and that Mrs. Crull should see her in five minutes.
+That lady then assisted him into the carriage, and kissed him on the
+forehead in a motherly way, which would have astonished the sedate
+family coachman, if he had not been entirely used to Mrs. Crull's
+eccentricities.
+
+"My good boy," said old Van Quintem, in a trembling voice, "are you sure
+we are not too late--quite sure?"
+
+"Sure!" said Bog.
+
+"Thank God! thank God!" murmured the old gentleman. Then he looked with
+a strange interest upon the honest and intelligent face of the lad. He
+was contrasting the history of the poor boy, which he had learned from
+Mrs. Crull, with that of his abandoned son.
+
+The carriage was stopped, by the order of Bog (who calmly took charge of
+the whole proceedings), at the corner of the street below the shop; and
+the party (excepting the driver) walked slowly toward the scene of
+interest. Old Van Quintem's increasing infirmities compelled him to lean
+for support on the arm of Mrs. Crull, and also with greater and more
+confiding weight, on that of Bog.
+
+As the party entered the shop, young Van Quintem was sitting with his
+head turned toward the door by which Miss Minford had vanished, savagely
+biting his finger nails. He wheeled in his chair, and confronted the
+intruders.
+
+"What the ---- are you doing here?" he cried to his father.
+
+"We are here to save a young girl from ruin, and you from another
+crime," said the old gentleman, greatly agitated, and leaning with his
+whole weight, now, on Bog's arm.
+
+"The ---- you are! And you have brought along an old woman, and a boy
+that looks like a pickpocket, to help you."
+
+The phrase "old woman" stirred up Mrs. Crull. She left the old
+gentleman's side, and advanced to within a yard of the profligate. "Old
+as I am," said she, "I'm strong enough to spank such a white-livered,
+broken-down puppy as you are. But I'll leave you to the hands of the
+law. It's a long lane that hasn't any turning, remember; and you'll pull
+up at the gallows at last. That's some comfort!"
+
+Mrs. Crull here became conscious that it was highly impolite to lose her
+temper, and she fell back to the support of her old friend. Young Van
+Quintem laughed at her, showing his white teeth unpleasantly.
+
+"Ah, I recognize you now," he continued, looking maliciously at the boy
+Bog. "You are the young thief that tracked me here, are you? I'll settle
+with you now."
+
+He sprang from his chair, and strode toward the lad. He was met halfway
+by Bog, whom the insulting epithet had stung to the quick.
+
+A foe met halfway is half vanquished. A single glance at Bog's clear,
+courageous eye, and his sinewy proportions, assured young Van Quintem
+that he had more than his match.
+
+"This--this is no place for a row," he faltered. "I'll attend to you,
+some time, in the street."
+
+"I shall always be ready for you," said Bog, smiling at this
+pusillanimous postponement--which is a mild way of making a
+clear backout.
+
+Here the attention of all was called off by the appearance of Miss
+Minford. The quick ear of the milliner had caught her footstep on the
+stairs, coming down. She unlocked the door, and the beautiful object of
+their search stood before them. She was very pale, and tears dimmed her
+eyes. Mrs. Crull flew toward her, and the poor girl fell on her breast,
+and cried as if her heart would break.
+
+Good Mrs. Crull helped her to a sofa, and sat down, and strained her
+young friend closely to her bosom, "Be calm," said she, "dear child!"
+
+Old Van Quintem and Bog looked on with sad interest. The young villain
+stood in a corner, gnawing his finger nails, and revolving schemes of
+vengeance. All waited for Miss Minford to become calm before any
+explanation was sought.
+
+Under the soothing caresses of Mrs. Crull, the young girl soon became
+comparatively tranquil. With her head still pillowed on the broad bosom
+of her protectress, she made a broken statement to the following effect,
+in response to the tender questionings of that lady:
+
+She said that she had no thought of leaving the house of her dear
+friend, until he had told her how much better it would be to earn her
+own living at some easy and pleasant trade, than to be dependent on one
+who was not a relative. He had also told her that, one day, when he was
+passing the house, he heard Mr. Crull scolding because Mrs. Crull had
+brought a girl home to be her companion.
+
+At this point, Mrs. Crull turned furiously toward the pale offender.
+"You miserable wretch!" said she. "I only wish my dear old man was here,
+to thrash you soundly. Why, he loved this little darling almost as much
+as I did. Besides, I'm the mistress of our house; and he never meddles
+with my affairs. Go on, dear Pet."
+
+Pet then stated that he (she never called him by his name) had promised
+to get a place for her, and that she, supposing he was a true friend,
+had accepted the offer of his aid. One day, when they had met by
+appointment (which was very wrong, she admitted, with a fresh torrent of
+tears), he told her that he had found a nice situation for her in a
+milliner's shop in Greenpoint, and that she must come right away, or she
+would lose the chance. She went home, and packed up her few things in a
+handkerchief, and came with him here in a carriage. She came directly
+here, and had not been out of Mrs. Wopping's sight since then. Mrs.
+Wopping had treated her very, very kindly.
+
+Mrs. Wopping, who had been lying in wait for her opportunity, here spoke
+up. She was a respectable woman, she said, thank God! and had been in
+the business for fifteen years, in New York. They could inquire about
+her in Canal street, where she had served her apprenticeship; in
+Division street, where she had been a forewoman; and in Grand street,
+where she had kept a shop. In an evil hour, she had been persuaded to
+start a millinery establishment in Greenpoint; and a very bad time she
+had had of it. All she knew about this unfortunate affair, was this: The
+young man, there, had called on her, a few days ago, and said that he
+wanted to do a favor for an orphan girl, who was a distant relative of
+his. She was poor, he said, but proud--no strange thing, Mrs. Wopping
+believed--and would not accept anything directly from him.
+
+"Therefore," said Mrs. Wopping, "he wanted to arrange with me to give
+her some easy work to do, enough to make her think she was earning her
+own living, and he would pay me her board, and give me twenty shillings
+a week to hand to her as her wages. By this plan, I could get a boarder
+at a fair price, and the services of a young lady to wait on the shop
+for nothing. Very imprudently, I consented, but not before I had made
+the young man there swear to Heaven that his intentions were honorable.
+This he did in the most solemn manner. I loved the dear girl at first
+sight, and determined to watch over her, and keep her from harm. I had a
+little sister once--long since dead--that much resembled her. I should
+add, that, though Miss Minford seemed to think very well of the young
+man there, when he brought her here, she became quite suspicious of him
+yesterday--he was here all yesterday afternoon--and refused to ride out
+with him, though he had brought a handsome carriage for her. I advised
+her not to go."
+
+"Thank you, good Mrs. Wopping!" said Mrs. Crull, shaking that lady by
+the hand, "you have been a true friend to our dear child; and I'll
+order my bonnets from you for the futer. Virtue shouldn't always be its
+own reward.
+
+"You see, now, my darling," continued Mrs. Crull, "what a scoundrel you
+have escaped from. Will you be my adopted child forever? Speak, my
+precious!"
+
+Poor Pet threw her soft white arms around the thick neck of her
+protectress, and cried for joy. "Dear, dear mother!" she murmured.
+
+There was a pause, daring which everybody but young Van Quintem had
+occasion to wipe their eyes. He paced up and down, his brow wrinkled,
+and inextinguishable hate flashing from his eyes.
+
+"Well, sir," said his father, calmly, "what atonement have you to make
+for this outrage?"
+
+"You're a ---- old fool, and that's all I've got to say."
+
+"Heaven be praised that his poor mother was not spared for this sorrow!"
+was the tranquil reply.
+
+"Curse you--and the old woman's memory. You're always making a fuss
+about her."
+
+The benignant expression of old Van Quintem's face vanished instantly,
+and a just rage gleamed on every feature. "Unnatural son! monster!
+fiend!" he cried, raising his hands aloft; "at last you have gone too
+far. Leave my presence, sir, and never--never--let me see your face
+again. I say to you, and before these witnesses, that I disown and
+disinherit you forever--forever--forever!"
+
+The coward son could not endure that terrible visitation of parental
+wrath, and fled, without another word, from the shop.
+
+Old Van Quintem fell exhausted upon the strong shoulder of the boy Bog.
+
+"Henceforth," said he, "you--you--shall be my son."
+
+[Illustration: FATHER AND SON.]
+
+
+
+BOOK TWELFTH,
+
+SPECULATIONS--PECUNIARY AND MATRIMONIAL.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE "COSMOPOLITAN WINDOW FASTENER."
+
+The "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" was a veritable success. For the
+first time in his life, Mr. Wesley Tiffles's theories had been
+demonstrated by results. Had the "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" been his
+own invention, and disposed of for his own behoof, he would have
+abandoned it long before its merits had been fairly tested, and tried
+some other of the myriad schemes that floated through his brain. But the
+profits of the "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" went to another; and this
+was the secret of Wesley Tiffles's persistent (and therefore successful)
+exertions.
+
+This was his plan of operations: In the first place, from the funds
+supplied by Marcus Wilkeson, he procured a patent for the invention. In
+the second place, he put an advertisement a column long in every daily
+paper--six insertions paid in advance--and handed a highly polished
+brass model of the invention to the editor, with a request to notice, if
+perfectly agreeable. The just and logical result followed. Instead of
+the ten-line paragraph with which patent churns and washing machines
+are ordinarily turned loose on society, the "Cosmopolitan Window
+Fastener" received notices so long and ornate, that it was quite
+impossible to derive from them a correct idea of the matchless
+simplicity of the invention.
+
+Having thus roused public curiosity, Tiffles, in the third place, took
+an office on Broadway, and put up a large sign inscribed in gilt
+capitals, "The Cosmopolitan Window Fastener Manufacturing Co." From this
+_pou sto_, Archimedes-like, he commenced to move the world of house
+owners. This he accomplished by the following manoeuvre: He caused
+double-leaded advertisements, under the head of special notices, to be
+inserted in all the papers, informing the public that it would be
+utterly impossible to supply the demand for the "Cosmopolitan Window
+Fastener," and that, therefore, it would be useless to send in orders.
+The Company were employing all the resources of two large manufacturing
+establishments; but it was evident that these would fail to meet the
+extraordinary and totally unexpected demand for this indispensable
+protection against burglars--this moral safeguard, as it might not
+inappropriately be called, of civilized homes. The Company had made
+every effort, but without success, to secure a force of skilled workmen
+equal to the emergency. Justice to their customers in all parts of the
+country, compelled the Company to announce that no orders received after
+that date could be filled under two months. Under these remarkable--they
+might say, in some respects, disagreeable--circumstances, they begged
+leave to throw themselves on the indulgence of a generous public.
+
+These notices were put forth not only in the form of newspaper
+advertisements, but as placards and handbills, which were stuck all over
+the city, and thrown into all the stages, falling like autumn leaves
+into the laps of passengers. This was the coöperative work of the boy
+Bog, who, though adopted by old Van Quintem as his son and heir, had not
+yet given up the bill-sticking business, but, on the contrary, had
+increased it, and now had a practical monopoly of it in the city, with
+branches in the suburbs. Bog would not eat the bread of idleness--and so
+he had modestly told Mr. Van Quintem--and that fine old gentleman had
+patted him on the back, and told him that there was genuine Dutch
+blood in him.
+
+Bogert & Co. now employed a hundred lads; and Bog's department of labor
+was the general planning of operations, and the receiving and
+disbursement of the money--and a very nice and agreeable department it
+was. It enabled Bog to dress neatly, and keep his hands clean--two
+points upon which he was now extremely fastidious. Bog was growing tall,
+manly, and handsome. He was also showing a great improvement in his
+grammar and pronunciation--the fruit of diligent attendance at the
+evening school.
+
+The public, being thus continually informed that orders for the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" could not possibly be filled under two
+months, very naturally began to send in orders for the invaluable
+invention, to be filled after that period. Every mail brought hundreds
+of them from all parts of the country. The Company--that is, Wesley
+Tiffles--sat at their desk in the Broadway office from, nine to three
+o'clock, exhibiting the window fastener to hundreds of visitors, and
+receiving orders rather as a matter of favor to the customer than to
+the Company.
+
+At the end of a month, when orders to the amount of nearly seventy-five
+thousand dollars had been received--every Northern and Western State
+being extensively represented on the books--the Company issued another
+advertisement, to the effect that, owing to the overwhelming pressure of
+business, they were willing to dispose of patent rights for two of
+the States.
+
+There was a rush of applicants, to all of whom the Company could
+truthfully exhibit large and genuine orders from all the States. The
+rights for two States were readily sold, and the Company then found that
+they could spare one more for a fair compensation; and so on, until
+every State in the Union had been disposed of, and the Company had not
+an inch of United States territory left. Not only this, but liberal
+purchasers were found for Cuba, Canada, South America, England, France,
+Germany, Russia, and all the countries of the Continent.
+
+In three months, the Company had disposed of their entire interest, and
+realized about one hundred thousand dollars cash. This sum Tiffles had
+faithfully paid over, as fast as received, to Fayette Overtop, who not
+only represented Marcus Wilkeson (unknown to Pet), but was Pet's own
+attorney and agent. By Fayette Overtop it was placed in bank, credited
+to Miss Patty Minford, and subject to her order alone.
+
+Thus it happened that the poor inventor had not toiled in vain for the
+child that he loved.
+
+Tiffles--with that strange unselfishness sometimes found in men of his
+class--had not thought of or desired any compensation for his services,
+other than the payment of all the bills incurred in the operation. The
+pleasure which he took in manipulating the public, and seeing his labors
+crowned with success, was the only reward that he wished for.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson, however, as soon as he saw that Tiffles was actually
+about to perform the amazing feat of raising money, determined, as an
+act of common justice, to insist upon his receiving twenty per cent. of
+the total. Tiffles flatly refused, at first, saying (which was true)
+that he could work a great deal better if he had no personal interest in
+the scheme; but yielded, at length, to the earnest solicitations of
+Marcus, backed by the emphatic declaration of Miss Minford (through her
+attorney), that she would not touch a penny of the money unless he
+consented. So, when the affairs of the Company were wound up, Tiffles
+found himself the possessor of twenty thousand dollars--a sum whose
+existence in a concrete form he had always secretly disbelieved. And
+Tiffles's first act was to settle up all his outstanding debts.
+
+The unexpected acquisition of this immense sum imparted a charm to every
+object in life except Miss Philomela Wilkeson.
+
+Poor Miss Wilkeson was quick to discern the change in Tiffles's manner
+toward her. His calls were as frequent as ever, but were exclusively on
+her half-brother, and had no side bearing in her direction. He no longer
+lingered in the entry to converse with her; and flatly refused her
+invitation to take a glass of wine in the dining room. Most ominous of
+signs, he did not press her hand in the least, when he took it in his
+own. His voice was no longer winning, but harsh and neglectful.
+Indifference brooded in the heart of the monster. The worst of it was,
+that he had been so cautious and noncommittal in his declarations, that
+she could not upbraid him for his perfidy. With a cold calculation
+worthy of a demon, he had made love in the pantomimic way, and eschewed
+written or verbal communications of an erotic nature. No jury could have
+muleted him one cent for damages in a breach-of-promise case, and
+he knew it.
+
+While Wesley Tiffles slipped off Miss Wilkeson like a loose glove, she
+might as well have tried to divest herself of her natural cuticle as to
+banish all thoughts of him. Miss Wilkeson was accustomed to allude
+mysteriously to certain sentimental affairs of her youth. In
+confidential moments, her friends had been favored with shadowy
+reminiscences of a romantic past. But truth compels us to state that
+Miss Wilkeson had never been the recipient of that delicate and awkward
+thing known as a proposal, and that she had never been kissed by man or
+boy since she wore long dresses. Hence the magnified importance which
+she attached to that kiss which, in a moment of reckless but cheap
+gallantry, Wesley Tiffles, on one fatal evening, had impressed upon her
+withered hand. She loved the destroyer of her peace with the pent-up
+energies of forty years.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+MIDDLE-AGED CUPID.
+
+Being in ignorance of Tiffles's sudden fortune, she was at a loss how to
+explain his defection. She conjectured all things, and finally settled
+down to the conclusion that he was a coy young man, and had not been
+sufficiently encouraged by her. She remembered instances where he had
+exhibited signs of ardor--in one case so far as beginning to slip a hand
+around her waist--and she had repelled him. He was evidently waiting for
+some marked encouragement. How foolishly prudish she had been!
+
+One evening, as Wesley Tiffles was passing through the hall to the door,
+after a rattling hour with the three bachelors, he was confronted by
+Miss Wilkeson, who chanced to leave the front parlor on a journey up
+stairs at that moment. She was dressed in a light silk, and her hair was
+carefully braided, and her face had a pink color in some parts, which
+contrasted well with the pallor in other parts; and her glass had told
+her that she was looking uncommonly youthful and charming. She had
+carefully studied her part, which was to be a bold one, throwing off
+all reserve.
+
+"Good evening, Mr. Tiffles," said she, promptly offering her hand.
+
+He took it with unsqueezing indifference. She had expected that.
+
+"Mr. Tiffles," said she, with an air of youthful raillery, "you are a
+naughty man, and I had an idea of not speaking to you again."
+
+"Naughty!" said Tiffles, astonished. "How?"
+
+"Why, you have hardly been civil to me, of late. I do believe you
+wouldn't speak, or shake hands with me, if I didn't always set the
+example." This in a half-complaining, half-laughing way.
+
+It suddenly flashed upon Tiffles that he had been, for some time,
+rather neglectful of the lady. It also forcibly occurred to him that it
+was wise policy to be on good terms, at all times, with the mistress of
+the house; and such was Miss Wilkeson's present position. He therefore
+clutched her hand again, gave it a faint squeeze, and said that he
+apologized a million times for his rudeness; but the fact was, he had so
+much business on hand, that he had been turned into a perfect bear, he
+supposed. He playfully challenged Miss Wilkeson to step into the parlor
+and take a glass of wine, and he would show her that he was not the
+brute she fancied.
+
+Miss Wilkeson laughingly accepted the challenge. "But I do believe," she
+added, "that it is only the glass of wine you care for. Now tell me, Mr.
+Tiffles, aren't you a woman hater?"
+
+"When a man is asked that question, categorically, by a woman, his most
+effective answer is to make love to her out of hand. Tiffles was not
+prepared to do this in the present case, but he was willing to pay
+compliments to any extent.
+
+"Ah, Miss Wilkeson, there you do me great injustice," said he, with his
+pleasantest of laughs. "I drink this glass of wine to 'lovely woman,'"
+with a nod at Miss Wilkeson.
+
+Miss Wilkeson giggled, and took a fly's sip from the brim of her glass.
+
+Tiffles heaved a sigh. "We bachelors are poor, unhappy fellows, really
+to be pitied."
+
+"You are horrid creatures--you know you are--and deserve no pity from
+us!" Miss Wilkeson played her frisky, juvenile part admirably.
+
+"So charming, and yet so cruel!" said Tiffles, uttering the first
+preposterous compliment that he thought of.
+
+"You flatterer!" said Miss Wilkeson, beating a breeze toward him with
+her fan.
+
+Tiffles, observing that matters were coming to a crisis, paused. Miss
+Wilkeson interpreted his silence as another attack of timidity. Time was
+valuable to her, and this kind of conversation might be kept up all
+night, and amount to nothing. She resolved upon her final _coup_.
+
+"Oh! oh! Mr. Tiffles, what--what is the matter?" She looked wildly about
+her.
+
+"The matter! What matter?" exclaimed that gentleman, little suspecting
+what was to happen.
+
+"The wine--the warm weather--something--oh! oh!"
+
+"With these inexplicable remarks, Miss Wilkeson dropped her fan, uttered
+a slight but sharp scream, and fell back in her chair, like a withered
+flower on a broken stalk.
+
+"By thunder, she has fainted!" said the excited Tiffles. He had never
+been in a similar dilemma, and did not know what to do. He had heard
+tickling of the feet highly recommended in such cases; but that was
+obviously impracticable. A dash of cold water in the face was also said
+to afford instant relief; but there was no water at hand. "I must call
+for help," said he.
+
+This remark appeared to arouse Miss Wilkeson. "Support me," she
+murmured. "I shall be better soon."
+
+Tiffles, all accommodation, clasped her fragile waist with an arm, and
+gently inclined her head upon his shoulder. She heaved a sigh, and gave
+other tokens of returning animation. Tiffles here noticed that her face
+had not the prevailing paleness which always accompanies fainting. He
+instantly suspected the true nature of Miss Wilkeson's complaint.
+
+The noise of quick footsteps resounded in the entry. Marcus, Overtop,
+and Maltboy had heard the sharp scream, and were rushing to the rescue.
+
+"Good heavens! what will they say?" exclaimed Tiffles. "Don't be silly,
+Miss Wilkeson, at your time of life." This cutting remark was wrung from
+him by the annoyance and confusion of the moment.
+
+It served as a wonderful anodyne; for Miss Wilkeson Jerked herself into
+an erect position, and said, "You're a fool!"
+
+At this juncture, before Tiffles had quite uncoiled his serpentine arms
+from her, and while she was looking fiery indignation at him, the door
+was pushed open, and the three bachelors rushed in.
+
+"I really beg pardon," said Marcus. "No occasion for my services, I
+see--ahem!"
+
+"Heard a scream--thought it was here--no intention to intrude," added
+Overtop.
+
+The tableau reminded Maltboy of his own innumerable little affairs, and
+he laughed. "It's a lovers' quarrel," said he, "and not to be
+interrupted, of course."
+
+The three bachelors hastily evacuated the room, and their merry laughs
+rang in the entry.
+
+"Miss Wilkeson," said Times, consulting his watch--he carried a gold
+one, with an enormous gold chain--"you must really excuse me. Important
+business engagement at nine. Good evening." So saying, Tiffles
+precipitately retired, with the determination not to enter the house
+again until he knew that Miss Wilkeson was out of it.
+
+A week from that memorable day, Tiffles met Marcus Wilkeson on Broadway.
+
+"Why haven't you been to see us?" said Marcus.
+
+"Not been very smart, of late," explained Tiffles.
+
+"Fainting fits, perhaps. Maybe they are catching, eh?"
+
+Tiffles smiled, for he saw that Marcus knew the truth. "How is Miss
+Wilkeson?" he asked, respectfully.
+
+"She has gone into the country for her health, and will probably stay
+away a number of years. In short, I have engaged for her the position of
+first preceptress of a female seminary in the middle of the State. She
+said she was quite sick of the hollow and heartless life of New York."
+
+Marcus spoke truly. Miss Wilkeson had retired to the country with a
+thorough feeling of disgust for town existence. She has taught for
+several years, and is still teaching in the ---- Young Ladies' Seminary,
+with eminent success, though her fair pupils complain, with much pretty
+pouting, of her savage restrictions upon all walks and talks with the
+eligible young beaux of the village. They say that she hates the men;
+and they call her a cross old maid, and a great number of other
+hard epithets.
+
+But, sometimes, a tear is observed in the corner of her eye, which she
+hastily wipes away. That tear is an oblation upon the memory of a lost
+love. That lost love was, and is, and always will be, Wesley Tiffles.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+SLAPMAN _vs_. SLAPMAN.
+
+The case of Slapman _vs_. Slapman occupied the attention of the referee,
+Samuel Goldfinch, Esq., over two months. That gentleman was corpulent,
+fond of good dinners, and had a highly cultivated taste for scandal. It
+had been his custom to give this interesting case a hearing one or two
+hours every afternoon, daily, after court. It was a relief from the
+heavy business of the day; for Goldfinch had heavy business, which came
+to him because he was a fat and pleasant fellow, with a large head, and
+a great circle of miscellaneous acquaintance. The real work of the
+office was done by a modest, unappreciated man named Mixer. On the
+occasion of these antimatrimonial audiences, Mixer sat in the back room,
+grubbing among his dusty papers; while Samuel Goldfinch, Esq., in the
+front room, with shut doors, leaned back in his easy chair and
+surrendered himself to enjoyment.
+
+In the case of Slapman _vs_. Slapman, a great number of witnesses had
+been examined on each side. Affidavits, amounting to hundreds of pages,
+had been obtained in distant States--some as far away as California. The
+lawyers had spared neither their own time nor the money of their clients
+in raking together testimony which would bear in the slightest degree
+upon the interests which they represented. All the relatives of Mr.
+Slapman had testified that he was a gentleman uniformly kind and
+courteous, possessing a singular placidity of temper, and indulgent to
+his wife to a degree where indulgence became a fault. Those relatives,
+and they were numerous--particularly in the country branch--who had
+passed anniversary weeks at Mr. Slapman's house, were very severe on
+Mrs. Slapman. She was a proud, disagreeable woman. She was continually
+snubbing her husband before people. She had a great many male friends,
+whose acquaintance she had retained in defiance of his wishes. She was
+known to have received letters from men, and when her husband had
+desired to peruse them, had laughed at him. It is true that she
+pretended to be a patroness of literature, science, and the arts; but
+anybody could see that those things were only the cover of the grossest
+improprieties. She had been heard to listen without remonstrance, to
+declarations of love from several young men. It turned out, upon
+cross-examination, that these irregularities took place in charades and
+plays, of which Mr. Slapman's relatives had been shocked spectators.
+With regard to Mr. Overtop's transactions in the family, they could say
+nothing; for they had long since ceased to visit Mrs. Slapman, on
+account of her disgraceful conduct--and also (they might have added, but
+they did not add) because Mrs. Slapman latterly had her house full of
+Jigbees, and put her husband's relatives into obscure rooms in the third
+story, and quite forgot their existence afterward.
+
+_Per contra_, all the Jigbees--and they were a prolific race--swore that
+their distinguished relative was a pattern of artlessness and innocence.
+That she was remarkable from early childhood for a charming frankness
+and transparent candor. That when this bright ornament of the Jigbee
+stock was sought in marriage by the defendant, the whole family, with
+one mind and voice, opposed the match. They had felt that a being of her
+exalted intellectual tastes was too good for a sordid money-getting
+creature like Slapman. But that man, by his ingenious artifices, had
+succeeded in winning the hand of their gifted kinswoman, and married her
+against their unanimous protests. There was but one consolation for this
+family misfortune. Mr. Slapman was reported to be wealthy, and could
+afford to indulge his wife in the exercise of her noble longings for
+TRUTH. They were willing to say that Mr. Slapman had not been illiberal,
+so far as vulgar money was concerned. He had given to his wife the house
+and lot which she occupied, and had never stinted her in respect of
+allowances. But what was money to a woman of Mrs. Slapman's soul, when
+her husband withheld from her his confidence and trust, regarded her
+innocent labors in behalf of Art, Literature, and the Drama, with a
+cold, unsympathizing eye, and finally descended so low as to feel a
+brutal jealousy of those gentlemen of talent, of whom she was the
+revered patroness?
+
+"Money" (we are quoting here from the remarks of Mrs. Slapman's eminent
+counsel) "is very desirable in its way, but is it not the vilest dross,
+your Honor, when compared with the pure gold of connubial trust and
+sympathy?" Mr. Goldfinch nodded his head, as if to say that he rather
+thought it was.
+
+The testimony of two servant girls established the fact that Mr. Slapman
+had several times been overheard to tell his wife that she would regret
+it; and that the time was fast coming when forbearance would cease to be
+a virtue; also that the worm, when trodden on repeatedly, might at last
+turn and sting, and many other enigmatical sayings of that character.
+The very vagueness of these threats, implying unknown horrors, had
+inspired his wife with a mortal dread of him. She did not know at what
+moment this jealous and revengeful man might strike her dead. She had
+been living in the fear of her life for six years, and, during all this
+time, had never complained, or expressed that fear to one of her
+relatives or friends.
+
+"Such is the noble, uncomplaining nature," said the eminent counsel, in
+reference to this fact, "of the woman that Fate has thrown into the arms
+of a fiend."
+
+But the most striking proof of Mr. Slapman's murderous designs upon his
+wife, was his conduct at the last dramatic _soirée_. Twenty witnesses
+swore that it was his evident intention to spring on her and strangle
+her, and that he was only thwarted in this horrid purpose by the noble
+courage of Fayette Overtop, Esq. Mr. Overtop briefly and modestly
+testified to this effect also; and, furthermore, narrated all the
+particulars of his acquaintance with Mrs. Slapman, holding before her a
+shield, from which the arrows of calumny, aimed by her husband,
+fell harmless.
+
+Mr. Slapman had not shown himself in the referee's office since the
+investigation began. He had become convinced that he had lost the case
+into which his mad jealousy and his lawyer's advice had plunged him.
+Mrs. Slapman, according to the testimony of the two servants and several
+others, was immured in her house, and brooding over this saddest episode
+in her unhappy history.
+
+"Nothing but that instinct of self-preservation," said the eminent
+counsel, "which bids the dove to fly from the hawk, and the rabbit to
+evade the pursuing hounds, could have induced that delicate, shrinking
+lady to lay bare the horrors of her prison house to the world, and to
+ask, in the name of common humanity, a release from the tyrant, and a
+liberal alimony."
+
+The eminent counsel repeated this flight of fancy in the ear of Mrs.
+Slapman, at the opera that evening, whither she was accompanied by a few
+of the Jigbees, and she smiled, and said that it was really beautiful.
+
+The protracted case--of which we have given a mere sketch--was decided
+by Samuel Goldfinch, Esq., in favor of the lady, a separation was
+decreed, and alimony fixed at six thousand dollars a year, that being
+only a wife's fair proportion of Mr. Slapman's income. Mrs. Slapman,
+with a well-assumed appearance of levity, gave a _grande soirée musicale
+et dramatique_ at her house, in honor of the event, at which Overtop was
+a favored guest. Mr. Slapman went direct to Slapmanville, and raised the
+rent on all his tenants, turned a superannuated non-paying couple into
+the street, and took a general account of his property, to see how much
+he could sell out for, preparatory to leaving for Europe, and so dodging
+the payment of the alimony.
+
+The illustrated papers published two portraits--one of an angel, the
+other of a demon. The angel was Mrs. Slapman: the demon was her husband.
+The comic papers served him up in puns, conundrums, and acrostics, of
+the most satirical import. The daily papers, always on the look out for
+subjects to write about, improved the occasion to overhaul the question
+of divorce, in its statistical, moral, social, and religious bearings.
+Two editors, in pursuance of a previous agreement, continued to discuss
+the question with great warmth in their respective journals, until they
+had written about two hundred octavo pages, when the debate was
+published in book form, with paper covers, and sold for their
+joint benefit.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+HOW OVERTOP SEALED A CONTRACT IN A WAY UNKNOWN TO CHITTY.
+
+The notoriety which Fayette Overtop had derived from his questionable
+connection with the Slapman Divorce case, had (as has been already
+stated) materially contributed to his professional income. By the time
+the case was decided, the firm of Overtop & Maltboy ranked among the
+most successful of the Junior Bar.
+
+Now that Overtop had his hands full of business, his thoughts reverted
+to matrimony more strongly than ever. It is a singular fact, that
+business men find more time to think of marriage, than men of leisure.
+
+Thoughts of matrimony invariably brought Miss Pillbody into Overtop's
+head. He would project mental photographs of her at the top of a table,
+beaming sweetly upon him, opposite, with her dim, lovely eyes, and
+pouring out the tea from a small silver pot. Overtop never could explain
+it; but this imaginary picture realized all his desires of domestic
+happiness.
+
+Overtop not only thought of Miss Pillbody, but, what was more to the
+purpose, he visited her. For this, pretexts were not wanting. They never
+are. At first, he professed to have been requested, by a friend in the
+country, to find a suitable private school for two young daughters. This
+justified several visits, until Miss Pillbody could decide positively
+that it would be impossible for her to take them--an announcement which
+greatly relieved Overtop, though it temporarily put an end to his calls.
+Then he hit upon the expedient of pretending to write an essay on
+Popular Education, for a monthly magazine, and desired to obtain hints
+from her upon the subject. Miss Pillbody, not displeased with the
+compliment, though declaring that she had not an idea to give him, gave
+him a great many good ideas, to which he appeared to listen, while he
+was contemplating her trim figure, and the animated expression of her
+face, and thinking how very well she would look at the head of that
+poetical table behind that phantom teapot. At last the topic of Popular
+Education ran out; and Overtop felt that this kind of imposition could
+not be practised much longer.
+
+One day, while Overtop sat at his desk, with a mass of law papers before
+him, thinking not of them but of his dilemma with respect of Miss
+Pillbody, a small boy brought him a beautifully written little note from
+that lady, asking him to call that evening on business. Overtop sent a
+reply, written with extraordinary care (this is a sign of love), saying
+that he would be happy to call, as requested. At the same time, he felt
+a pang of apprehension that she had found places in her school for the
+two young daughters of his supposititious country friend.
+
+Overtop dressed with unusual care that evening, and presented himself at
+Miss Pillbody's house, punctually at the appointed hour. The young
+teacher was hard at work in the back parlor, setting copy for the
+illiterate wife of a rich city contractor to try her brawny fist on next
+day. Miss Pillbody's bewitching eyeglasses bestrided her nose; and the
+narrow collar, wristbands, and dainty apron with the red-bound pockets,
+looked whiter than ever.
+
+The teacher blushed slightly as Overtop entered, and put away the copy
+book on a high shelf, thereby intimating that she should not work more
+that night, and Overtop could stay as long as he would. Thus, at least,
+that sagacious student of men, women, and things, interpreted it.
+Without a particle of those preliminary commonplaces for which Overtop
+had a cherished aversion, Miss Pillbody broke into business at once.
+
+She said that a Mrs. Cudgeon, the wife of a citizen who had made a large
+fortune in butter and eggs, had been taking lessons in all the English
+branches, and French (here Miss Pillbody smiled), for six months, but
+had postponed payment on one pretext and another, and had finally
+withdrawn from the school, leaving unpaid tuition to the amount of one
+hundred and fifty dollars. Miss Pillbody had written several dunning
+letters to Mrs. Cudgeon, and received no answer. The soft grass of
+epistolary entreaty having failed, Miss P. now proposed to try what
+virtue there was in the hard stones of the law. She had sent to Mr.
+Overtop for advice.
+
+Overtop listened to the statement of the case with professional
+attentiveness. He was sub-thinking, all the time, what an extremely
+sensible woman Miss Pillbody was, not to allow herself to be cheated,
+but to go to law in defence of her rights. He assured his interesting
+client that she could count on his best services, and that she might
+consider the one hundred and fifty dollars as good as recovered. From
+this point the conversation glided off into a wilderness of general
+topics. Overtop had a habit (a bad one, it must be confessed) of
+sounding people's mental depths. He found that Miss Pillbody was no
+shallow thinker. He left the house at eleven o'clock, supposing it was
+ten, and had a delightful vision, that night, of the little round table
+and the teapot, and the presiding angel.
+
+Next day, Overtop wrote the following letter:
+
+     New York,--.
+
+     MR. J. CUDGEON:
+
+     SIR: Enclosed is a bill of items, amounting to one hundred
+     and fifty dollars, for your wife's tuition at Miss
+     Pillbody's private school. Be good enough to look it over,
+     and inform me, to-morrow, what you will do about it. I will
+     tell you candidly, that it is for our interest, as a young
+     law firm, to sue you for the debt; but my client will not
+     consent to this, until all other efforts fail, out of regard
+     to the feelings of Mrs. C.
+
+     Your obedient servant,
+
+     OVERTOP & MALTBOY,
+
+     No ------ Building,
+
+     J. CUDGEON, Esq.
+
+Overtop remembered that one J. Cudgeon had run for the Assembly at the
+previous fall election, and he surmised that, being a politician and a
+public character, J. Cudgeon would not like to see the bill of items in
+print. Overtop reasoned correctly; for, at ten A.M. the following day,
+that gentleman called at the office and paid the one hundred and fifty
+dollars, and said that he was very much obliged to Overtop & Maltboy for
+their gentlemanly conduct in the affair. Mr. Gudgeon had not been aware
+of his wife's pupilage at Miss Pillbody's private school, though he had
+observed (he added, confidentially), for some months past, a slight
+improvement in her grammar. "I am not ashamed to say that we were poor
+once," said Mr. Gudgeon, with a glow of pride.
+
+"When Overtop placed the one hundred and fifty dollars in the white hand
+of the schoolmistress, she looked at him with gratitude and admiration,
+which more than repaid him. Not only this, but she asked him, with not a
+particle of hesitation, how much his fee was.
+
+"Fee!" exclaimed Overtop, a little nettled at the implied insult. (Young
+lawyers are apt to be.) "Nothing, Miss Pillbody; decidedly nothing."
+
+"But I prefer to pay you, Mr. Overtop. Why should you work for me for
+nothing, when I am not willing to do the same thing for Mrs. Gudgeon?
+'The laborer is worthy of his hire,'" she added, laughing. "I set that
+adage in a copy book to-night."
+
+"But I won't take anything," said Overtop, no longer nettled, but
+charmed to perceive this exhibition of sound good sense in a young lady.
+
+"But I insist that you shall," continued Miss Pillbody, pleasantly.
+"Tell me, now, how much it is."
+
+Overtop was standing within two feet of the schoolmistress, and her
+soft, dim eyes were beaming right into his. We leave psychologists to
+settle the phenomenon as they will; but the fact was, that each saw love
+in the eyes of the other. Overtop, in his bachelor musings, had thought
+over a hundred odd methods of putting _the_ question. At this critical
+moment in the history of two hearts, a new form of the proposition
+occurred to him, so original and eccentric, that he determined to
+propound it at once.
+
+He took Miss Pillbody's hand in his, before she knew it. She blushed,
+and would have withdrawn it; but he retained the hand with a
+gentle pressure.
+
+"My dear Miss Pillbody," said Overtop, "I will take five dollars from
+you on one condition, and no other. Will you grant it?"
+
+The schoolmistress, not knowing what she was saying, said "Yes."
+
+"The condition is, that I shall buy an engagement ring, and put it on
+this dear hand."
+
+Miss Pillbody blushed, and cast down her gentle eyes. The sagacious
+young lawyer, interpreting these signs as a full consent, stole his arm
+around her waist, and sealed the contract in a way all unknown
+to Chitty.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+A RETURNED CALIFORNIAN.
+
+At last, Matthew Maltboy was engaged. He had, since twenty, been
+dallying on the edge of a betrothal. Now he had taken the momentous step
+into that anomalous region which lies between celibacy and married
+life, where a man is not exactly a bachelor, nor yet, by any means, a
+husband. It is the land in which the dim enchantments of romance begin
+to assume the plain outlines of reality. It is the land in which the
+pledge of undying affection, breathed, at some rapturous moment, into a
+delicate, inclining ear, becomes invested with awful meaning, and has a
+value in the legal market like a bond and mortgage. It is the land where
+the excitement of pursuit is over, and the game is securely cornered,
+but not yet in hand. It is the spot where the ardent huntsman of Love
+pauses to look back, and ceases to bend his longing gaze into the
+distance beyond.
+
+How it came to pass that the unreliable Matthew Maltboy had become the
+affianced one of the pleasant widow Frump, it is not the purpose of this
+history to record. Let it suffice to say, that the mutual aversion which
+they felt, some months before, at Mr. Whedell's house, on New Year's
+day, was the starting point in their course of true love. Such an
+aversion, subsequently smoothed away, is often the most promising
+beginning of a courtship.
+
+Mrs. Frump had frequently met Matthew on the street, and been gratified
+with his deferential bow. His bulk, to which, as a rotund lady, she had
+taken an antipathy, seemed to dwindle down as it was looked at. Matthew,
+whose ideal was a delicate woman with observable shoulder blades, had
+also, by repeated sights of Mrs. Frump, become reconciled to her ample
+proportions. Meantime, they had heard much, incidentally, of each other
+through Marcus Wilkeson. Matthew had come to esteem Mrs. Frump for her
+affectionate devotion to old Van Quintem; and Mrs. Frump had secretly
+admired the powerful though silent legal ability displayed by Mr.
+Maltboy in the inquisition before Coroner Bullfast.
+
+One night, Matthew, accompanied Marcus to his old friend's house; and,
+on the second night following, this couple were engaged--a happy event,
+which was brought about no less by the widow's experience, and
+conviction that there was no time to lose, than by Matthew's
+impulsive ardor.
+
+He had been engaged ten days; and so entirely had he talked out the time
+to the widow, that it seemed six months.
+
+"Why is it," thought Matthew, stretching himself in his chair, and
+looking critically at the widow, who was knitting crotchet work, "why is
+it that I no longer adore her? She is just as pretty, just as amiable,
+just as affectionate as ever. Now, why don't I care a button for her at
+this moment?" Matthew was not a transcendental philosopher; and the true
+answers to these questions did not come to him.
+
+Old Van Quintem, pale and beautiful in his declining years, sat by the
+window that opened on the green leaves of the back yard, calmly smoking
+his pipe, and thinking, with a holy sadness, of his dead wife and his
+worse-than-dead son. The old gentleman, and the two quiet affianced
+ones, who sat near him, made up a well-dressed and handsome group; the
+pictorial effect of which was suddenly marred by the apparition of a
+stranger in the doorway.
+
+He was tall, muscular, and what little could be seen of his face through
+a heavy growth of whiskers was mild and prepossessing, in spite of two
+large scars just visible below the broad brim of a rough hat. His dress
+was faded and dirty.
+
+The stranger stood in the doorway, and surveyed the occupants of the
+room.
+
+Old Van Quintem looked at the intruder a moment, and then said, as if
+remembering something, "Are you the man sent by Crumley to mend my
+piazza railing?"
+
+There was the least hesitation in the man's voice, as he answered, "Yes,
+sir. I'm here to do that job." His voice was a deep growl, as of a
+grizzly bear half tamed.
+
+"Where are your tools?" asked old Van Quintem.
+
+The stranger communed with himself, and then replied, in the most
+natural manner, "I s'pose I only want a saw, a hammer, and a few nails.
+You have 'em, haven't yer?"
+
+"You're a funny sort of carpenter, to travel without your tools. Do you
+know, now, that you look more like a California miner than a carpenter?"
+
+"That's not very 'markable," returned the stranger, in profound guttural
+accents, "considerin' as how I come from California this week."
+
+"You have brought home tons of gold, I dare say," said old Van Quintem,
+playfully.
+
+"A little," growled the stranger. "The diggins was poor in Calaveras
+County when I fust went there, but latterly they improved."
+
+At the mention of Calaveras County, the widow suddenly fixed her eyes
+upon the stranger, and then dropped them on her crotchet work.
+
+Matthew Maltboy here conceived a happy thought, namely, to ask this
+stranger if he ever knew Amos Frump (the deceased husband of Mrs.
+Frump), who was killed in that very county in an affray growing out of a
+disputed claim, five years before. Mrs. Frump, after her engagement to
+Matthew, had furnished him with slips from three California papers,
+giving full particulars of the sanguinary affair. Before he was engaged,
+he had never felt the slightest curiosity to know the history of his
+predecessor; but, since then, he had entertained a strong secret desire
+to learn more of him, and especially of the reasons which induced him to
+abandon a young and lovely wife, and make a Californian exile of
+himself. Upon this subject the widow had never volunteered any
+satisfactory information, and he had been politely reluctant to ask
+her about it.
+
+Old Van Quintem, who was too sleepy at that time to talk much, procured
+the necessary tools from a cupboard in the kitchen, and showed the
+stranger what work was to be done. The old gentleman then returned to
+his easy chair by the window, threw a handkerchief over his head, and
+settled himself for a nap.
+
+Before the carpenter had struck the first blow, Matthew Maltboy rose,
+remarked to the widow that he wanted to stretch himself a little, and
+walked out upon the piazza.
+
+The carpenter stood near the door, with the saw in one hand and the
+hammer in the other, very much in the attitude of listening. At
+Matthew's approach, he commenced feeling the teeth of the saw, as if to
+test their sharpness.
+
+"I would like to speak a word with you, sir," said Matthew, in a low
+voice, motioning the carpenter to accompany him to a corner of the
+piazza, out of the widow's possible hearing.
+
+Having attained that safe position, Matthew opened the great subject.
+
+"You remarked that you had dug gold in Calaveras County," said he. "Did
+you ever happen to know a man by the name of Frump--Amos Frump--who was
+a miner there?"
+
+"Frump!" replied the carpenter. "He was an intimate friend of mine."
+
+"Now that's lucky," said Matthew, "for I want to find out something
+about the man."
+
+"Then you've come to the right shop," answered the carpenter; "for his
+own brother--if he ever had one--couldn't tell you more about him
+than I."
+
+"I am indeed fortunate. In the first place, then this man Frump is
+really--dead?"
+
+The carpenter pulled his rough hat farther over his forehead, and
+replied:
+
+"As dead as two big splits in the skull could make him. But 'xcuse me,
+sir; he was my bosom friend, and I can't bear to talk of his death."
+
+"He _is_ dead, then, and no mistake," said Matthew, soliloquizing. "Yet
+I am not exactly glad to know it."
+
+The carpenter's face expressed surprise at this remark.
+
+"I beg your pardon," said Matthew. "Of course I am not glad to hear of
+your friend's death. But, to tell the truth," he continued (inventing an
+excuse), "I had always heard that this Frump was a wild fellow; that he
+didn't treat his wife decently, and at last ran away from her. You see I
+am acquainted with the family. In fact, I know Mrs. Frump quite well."
+
+"And did she tell you all this about her dead husband?" asked the
+carpenter.
+
+"Oh, no!" returned Matthew, who began to fear that he had gone too far.
+"She never says anything about his personal character. I only spoke from
+common report."
+
+"Then common report is a common liar; for I know there never was a
+steadier chap than this same Amos Frump; and his wife can't say that he
+ever struck her, or said a cross word to her. Amos told me all about
+himself; and I'd believe him through thick and thin." The carpenter
+spoke in his dismal chest voice, without the least indication of
+excitement.
+
+"Then why did he leave his wife? and why did she never hear of him until
+the time of his death? You will confess that _that_ was odd."
+
+"I give you the reasons," answered the carpenter, "as Amos give 'em to
+me. It seems that _he_ was a poor, uneducated feller. _She_ had a few
+thousand dollars from her grandfather's property, and was sent by her
+parents to the best o' schools. Though he and she were so much unlike,
+they got up a kind o' fondness for each other from the time when Amos
+saved her from bein' run over by a horse. They used to meet each other
+secretly, because, you see, her folks didn't like Amos. They thought
+that a girl with three or four thousand dollars in her own name, ought
+to set her eyes rather above a feller like him. Well, arter no end o'
+trouble, they was married. Her folks pretended to treat Amos all right,
+but was allers talkin' agin him; and finally they pizened her mind with
+the idee that he had married her only for her money, and that all the
+while he loved another gal. She began to treat him very cold like, and,
+one day, when she was in a little bit of temper--"
+
+"Has Mrs. Frump any temper?" asked Matthew, anxiously. "I never saw it."
+
+"But you a'n't her husband," replied the carpenter. "Amos told me that
+she did show a leetle temper now and then. However, he allers said she
+was a pooty good gal in the main. Well, one day, when her dander was up
+about somethin', she told him that she b'lieved he married her for her
+money, and she'd die before he should have a cent. Amos was a proud
+feller, if he _was_ poor; and, when he heerd this, he left the house
+right off, walked to New York, and shipped as a sailor to San Francisco.
+I met him when he fust come to the mines, and, as he was a spry, tough
+chap, I let him work a claim with me on shares. We ate and slept
+together, and many a time, in the dark night, has he spoke to me about
+his wife, and how much he thought of her; but he said he never should go
+back till he had money enough to buy out her and her hull family. We was
+very unlucky, and Amos got downhearted, and took to drink. By and by he
+moved off to another claim, and worked on his own hook. He did better
+there; but all the gold he dug out he used to spend in gamblin' and rum;
+and at last a drunken quarrel put an end to Amos Frump."
+
+"Poor fellow!" said Matthew. "And do you think the widow ever grieved
+for him?"
+
+"No, I guess not; for Amos allers said that she was not a very lovin',
+affectionate woman; though, if he had been as rich as her, or if her
+family had let her alone, she would have made him a tol'able wife."
+
+"Not loving! Not affectionate!" thought Matthew. "And I am about to
+marry her!" A cold shudder crept over him.
+
+Hiding his emotions with an effort, he again interrogated the affable
+carpenter:
+
+"And do you really think that Mr. Frump would have returned, and lived
+again with his wife, if he had become rich?"
+
+"To be sure he would. He couldn't marry anybody else, yer know, without
+committin' bigamy. He allers said he didn't care much whether his wife
+loved him, so long as she treated him civilly."
+
+"Mr. Frump had practical views of married life," suggested Matthew.
+
+"Amos was sensible in some things," said the carpenter. "But he was a
+queer feller, too. He allers had a notion of comin' home kind o'
+disguised, so that his wife shouldn't know him. I used to tell him that
+a few more years in Californy would make him so thin, yaller, and
+grizzly, that he wouldn't need no disguise."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+REVELATIONS OF A LAUGH.
+
+The carpenter here burst out with an extraordinary peal of laughter. It
+was so very peculiar, that, once heard, it would always be identified
+with the person making it. This singular laugh consisted of a brilliant
+stacatto passage on a high key, interrupted by occasional snorts, and
+terminating with a slur which covered the whole descending octave. It
+was also very loud and very long.
+
+It had the effect of bringing Mrs. Frump to the door. She thrust out her
+head, unseen by either the carpenter or Matthew, and looked at the
+former with a wondering air.
+
+"It was an odd idea," said Matthew, laughing slightly out of compliment
+to the carpenter, though he could not understand what there was to
+laugh at.
+
+"And now," continued he, when the carpenter's cachinations had subsided,
+"I will explain to you my motive in asking all these questions. I am
+engaged to Mrs. Frump, and she is now--"
+
+The carpenter immediately broke into another of his remarkable laughs,
+louder and longer than before.
+
+"Well, sir," said Matthew, sarcastically, "when you get through, perhaps
+you will be good enough to tell me what you are laughing about?"
+
+"The idee--ha! ha!--of your--ha! ha!--marrying Mrs.--ha! ha! ha!" and
+the remainder of the sentence was lost in that monstrous laugh.
+
+Matthew, irritated by this most aggravating species of ridicule, took
+the carpenter's measure for a kick--but judiciously refrained from
+fitting him with one.
+
+The second of the carpenter's laughs had made the widow (still
+stealthily looking out of the door) turn pale. The third had inspired
+her with a painful curiosity, which she had determined to gratify, at
+any risk. Before the last laugh, she had, therefore, crept up,
+unobserved, near where Matthew and the carpenter were standing, with
+their backs toward her. Coming around suddenly in front of them, she saw
+the carpenter's mouth wide open, still in the act of laughing, and
+observed that one of his front teeth was out. The widow screamed, and
+fell--into Matthew's arms, nearly flooring him.
+
+"Hold on to her," said the carpenter. "She will come to in a minute."
+
+"Who, sir--who on earth _are_ you?" shouted Matthew, struggling under
+the burdensome widow and a sense of mental bewilderment.
+
+"I am Amos Frump," he replied, in a voice which had suddenly risen five
+notes.
+
+"The widow's husband! The dead come to life!" exclaimed Matthew,
+starting back, and nearly dropping the inanimate form.
+
+Astounded as he was, he did not forget the marital rights of the man
+before him; and he said, with a trembling voice, politely, "I beg your
+pardon; but, as you are this lady's husband, perhaps you had better
+hold her."
+
+"She appears to be doing very well where she is," replied the singularly
+calm Amos Frump. "A moment more, and she will be out of her fainting
+spell. I've seed her very often this way before."
+
+Mr. Frump's prediction was verified; for his lips had scarcely closed on
+the words, when Mrs. Frump opened her eyes, and feebly said, "Is it
+a dream?"
+
+"No, Gusty," replied the composed Amos; "it is a husband come back from
+Californy, with fifty thousand dollars."
+
+"It is--it is my own 'husband's voice!" cried Mrs. Frump, throwing
+herself impulsively out of Matthew's arms upon the patched and faded
+coat of her restored consort.
+
+"I thought you would know the voice," said Amos, "and that's the reason
+I changed it into a growl. This 'ere old Californy suit was a pooty good
+disguise, too. But my confounded laugh betrayed me. I didn't think to
+change that."
+
+The third laugh had roused old Van Quintem from a nice nap, and he came
+out on the piazza.
+
+"Hallo, Mr. Carpenter! what are you doing there?" said he,
+good-naturedly.
+
+A few words from the supposed carpenter defined his position, and threw
+old Van Quintem into the appropriate state of amazement. Looking at the
+shaggy face by a variety of lights, he soon came to recognize it as that
+of his niece's husband, whom he had seen a few times on his yearly
+visits to the country, before his farming brother, Nicholas Van Quintem,
+father of Mrs. Frump, had died.
+
+"From the way Gusty hangs to you, I judge you are no ghost," said old
+Van Quintem, when he had partly recovered his senses.
+
+"No more than I am a carpenter," was the dry response.
+
+"But how does it happen that you are no ghost?" asked old Van Quintem,
+with fearful interest.
+
+This was what everybody wanted to know; and so Mr. Frump, supporting his
+wife by the waist, while she, apparently half stupefied, reposed her
+head on his shoulder, explained the mystery of his appearance. He had
+been severely injured in a drunken quarrel about a claim--he would not
+deny _that_; and, taking off his broad-brimmed hat, he showed the two
+deep scars extending from his eyebrows to the roots of his hair. He was
+left on the ground for dead, and his assailants ran away. The
+enterprising correspondent of three San Francisco papers saw him when he
+was first found, and, learning that he would undoubtedly die, the
+enterprising correspondent regarded him as already sufficiently dead for
+newspaper purposes, and sent three thrilling accounts of his butchery,
+written up with ingenious variations, to the three journals of which he
+was the indefatigable "special." In a few days, the nearly murdered man
+was out of danger. On learning that the news of his death had already
+been sent to the papers, the singular idea came into his mind to let the
+report go uncontradicted, change his name, give up drinking, move away
+to some place where he was not known, and begin his miner's life over
+again. The special correspondent, on being consulted by him, assured Mr.
+Frump that he could depend on his (the correspondent's) silence, since
+it was his invariable practice never to take back or qualify any
+statement made by him--such a course being obviously fatal to his
+hard-earned reputation for accuracy. The correspondent also very
+obligingly supplied him with copies of the papers containing the
+circumstantial accounts of his death, which he directed in a disguised
+hand, and sent through the mail to his wife. He had then assumed another
+name, gone into Benicia County, was successful in gold digging, and,
+after making about two thousand dollars, had taken up his residence in
+the nearest village (undesignated), and had invested his money in
+speculations (kind not particularized). Fortune followed him, but he
+found it convenient, for certain reasons (not given), to move away to
+another village, in a few months. In fact, he had, within four years,
+made the entire circuit of California, never staying in one place more
+than a quarter of a year.
+
+"I don't want to brag," said Mr. Frump, "but it is well enough to have
+it understood that I made my pile."
+
+Mr. Frump nodded his head quietly, as one who does not lie.
+
+Old Van Quintem had hitherto hesitated to congratulate Mrs. Frump upon
+the reacquisition of her husband. He now advanced, and shook her warmly
+by the hand.
+
+"I wish you joy," said he. "And you too, Mr. Frump. I never had the
+pleasure of meeting you often, though I had frequently heard of you.
+With regard to those unpleasant family difficulties in which you became
+involved, they are now at an end; for Gusty's parents are both dead, and
+the old house and farm are sold. Let bygones be bygones."
+
+"So say I, Mr. Van Quintem," said Mr. Frump, grasping the extended hand.
+"As for my wife's relatives, I'm sure I allers forgave 'em. As for the
+old house and farm, if you like, Gusty, we'll buy it back agin."
+
+Mrs. Frump, still resting on her husband's shoulder, sobbed a little,
+and clung closer about him.
+
+"Here is one friend of the family," continued Amos, in his pleasantest
+manner, pointing to Matthew, "whom I don't know by name, though we've
+scraped an off-hand 'quaintance."
+
+"Mr. Frump--Matthew Maltboy, Esq.," said old Van Quintem.
+
+Matthew, like Mrs. Frump, had fully appreciated the awkwardness of his
+situation, and had kept a rigid silence since the returned Californian
+resumed possession of his wife. The minute after Mr. Frump's identity
+had been established, Matthew could have hugged him with ecstasy. But,
+having lost the widow, his fickle mind straightway began to discover in
+her a great many excellencies that he had never seen before. Therefore,
+when he submitted his hand to the grip of Mr. Frump, his face expressed
+a strangely mingled joy and regret.
+
+"I like you," said Mr. Frump, "and, as soon as wifey and I commence
+housekeepin' agin, I'll expect lots o' visits from you. Whenever I'm not
+at home, wifey'll make everything comfortable. Won't you, dear?"
+
+"If you wish it," replied Mrs. Frump, looking up into his face, which
+was not a repulsive one, "for your word shall always be my law."
+
+"I must say," said Matthew, his face exhibiting unqualified admiration
+for Mr. Frump, "that you are the most generous man I ever met. And, if
+Mrs. Frump will promise to introduce me to some nice young woman, that
+she could recommend for a wife, perhaps I'll accept your invitation."
+
+"I'll get you a wife in less than a week," said Mrs. F., who was
+rejoiced that the interview between her recovered husband and late
+suitor had ended peacefully.
+
+"But one thing you haven't yet explained, Amos," said old Van Quintem.
+"How did you get into Crumley's employment?"
+
+"Bless your innocent heart, I am not! I arrived this mornin', in the
+steamer----, straight from Aspinwall, with this old scarecrow suit on,
+jest as you see me now. I was intendin' to take the railroad for Tioga
+County, and play off a leetle surprise on Gusty, and her relations up
+there. But, before goin', it 'curred to me to call on a Mr. Lambkin, who
+was raised in Tioga, and keeps a grocery store in the lower part of
+Washington street. I found Mr. Lambkin in, and he told me as how,
+accordin' to last accounts, Gusty was stayin' with her uncle Van
+Quintem. I knowed your address, and come up here short metre. I was
+goin' to pretend that I was a man in search of work, and trust to luck
+to get a sight of Gusty. I found your front door open, and walked
+through the entry to the back parlor, where you fust see me standin'.
+Afore I could ask you for any work, you wanted to know if I hadn't been
+sent to mend your piazza railing. It was easy to say 'Yes,' and I
+said it."
+
+"And very well you carried out the joke, Amos," said old Van Quintem.
+"You wouldn't make a bad actor."
+
+"Rather better actor than carpenter, I guess," said Mr. Frump.
+
+"Perhaps so," said old Van Quintem; "but a financier of your talent
+needn't act, or mend railings, for a living. I should like to know, now,
+how you made your money in California. Nine out of ten who go there,
+come back poorer than they went."
+
+"'Tisn't best to ask too many questions of a returned Californian,"
+answered Amos, in perfect good humor.
+
+"Nor of anybody else, about business matters. You are right," added old
+Van Quintem.
+
+"I say to wifey, and to all my friends, 'Let bygones be bygones. Take
+me as you find me, and I'll take you as I find you; and we'll ax no
+questions on either side.'"
+
+"Dear Amos, you are the best of husbands!" said Mrs. Frump, looking
+fondly in his face. Mr. Frump improved as he was looked at.
+
+"Let bygones be bygones' is a very good rule," said old Van Quintem.
+
+"Mr. Frump," said Matthew, unable longer to repress the compliment, "you
+have a wonderful amount of good sense!"
+
+"I told you," was the laughing reply, "that 'Amos was sensible in some
+things.'"
+
+
+
+BOOK THIRTEENTH
+
+THE STRANGE LADY.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+A STORY OF THE PAST.
+
+Another year slipped away, and wrought many changes among the
+inhabitants of the block. Some of them had passed from stately mansions
+to those narrow houses which are appointed for all the living. Others
+had wedded, and moved to other blocks which were to be their future
+homes--till the 1st of the following May. Some of them had grown rich by
+quick speculations, and got into the choicest society by the simple
+manoeuvre of taking a four-story brownstone front in the avenue which
+formed the eastern boundary of the block. Others had attained to poverty
+by the same process, and had migrated to cheaper lodgings in blocks
+remote, expecting that a lucky turn of Fortune's wheel would bring them
+back to fashionable life next year, as it most likely would. The
+principal personages of this history had been radically affected by this
+lapse of time--as will hereafter be shown--with the single exception of
+Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+For one year, life had passed tranquilly, uneventfully. He had sought,
+and found, in his dear books, a panacea for that sickness of the heart
+which sometimes attacked him in his lonelier hours. At such, times, he
+would repeat to himself these expressive lines of an old poet:
+
+     This books can do; nor this alone; they give
+     New views of life, and teach us how to live;
+     The grieved they soothe, the stubborn they chastise;
+     Fools they admonish, and confirm the wise.
+     Their aid they yield to all; they never shun
+     The man of sorrow, or the wretch undone.
+     Unlike the hard, the selfish, and the proud,
+     They fly not sullen from the suppliant crowd,
+     Nor tell to various people various things,
+     But show to subjects what they show to kings.
+
+The end of the quiet, sad (but not unpleasantly sad) twelve months found
+Marcus, on a bright morning in the month of August, sitting at his
+window, with a favorite book on his knees, looking--where he should not
+have looked so much--at that window in the old house where the only
+tragedy of his life had been wrought. As he gazed, like one fascinated
+by a spell, his features lengthened, and the habitually melancholy
+expression of his face became deepened and confirmed.
+
+So wrapt was he in these unhappy self-communings, that he did not hear a
+vigorous "rat-tat-tat" on the door of the little back parlor. A
+repetition of the performance aroused him, and to his call, "Come in,"
+Mash, the cook, presented herself.
+
+"A woman at the door wishes to speak to you, sir, on important business,
+she says. Shall I show her in, sir?" Mash laid stress on the word
+"woman," in retaliation for the somewhat peremptory way in which the
+person in question had accosted her at the door. The "Buttery and the
+Boudoir--a Tale of Real Life," afforded her a precedent on this point.
+
+"Show in the lady," said Marcus, wondering who she could be.
+
+A tall, shapely person, dressed in deep black, and wearing a thick veil,
+was ushered into the room. She bowed slightly, and took a seat which
+Marcus offered her, near the window, and then looked significantly at
+Mash, who lingered in an uncertain way about the door.
+
+"You may shut the door, Mash," said Marcus; and Mash did so with a
+little slam, intended to pierce the heart of the mysterious woman in
+black, for whom that domestic had, in one minute, conceived a
+mortal dislike.
+
+The strange woman drew back her veil, and revealed a thin, pale face,
+which might have been handsome twenty years back. "Do you remember
+having seen me before?"
+
+Marcus looked into the thin face with polite scrutiny. "Yes, madam,"
+said he, at length. "I think I saw you on a railway train in New Jersey,
+over a year ago; and also in the town of--, in that State, on the
+evening of a certain unfortunate exhibition. But you are changed, in
+some respects, since then."
+
+"You would say that I am paler and thinner; and I am here to tell you
+why I am, and also to make all the atonement in my power for a crime
+that I have committed."
+
+Marcus Wilkeson's first thought was of the unfathomed murder. His
+startled face expressed what was passing through his mind.
+
+The strange woman read his thoughts. "The crime to which I refer is not
+the murder of Mr. Minford; of which, I may here say, I believed, from
+the first, that you were entirely innocent. Crimes--of that character,
+at least--have never been known in your family."
+
+"All that you say, taken in connection with some curious circumstances
+which occurred on that railway ride, and that memorable night in New
+Jersey," said Marcus, "make me intensely anxious to hear what you have
+to tell. Please impart the information at once, and fully. I call Heaven
+to witness, that your name, your history, the secret which you are to
+reveal, shall pass with me to the grave, if you desire it."
+
+"I accept your offer," said she, with emotion, "though my crime is so
+flagrant that no publicity, no punishment would be too great for it.
+Still, as full justice can be done, and reparation made, without this
+public disgrace, I prefer that my identity should be unknown except to
+you. I think that I have but few months to live." The woman expelled a
+hacking cough.
+
+"My story must be short," said she, "and suited to my strength and this
+cough. You probably remember Lucy Anserhoff, who was a little playmate
+of yours in your native village? I see, by your nod, that you do. I
+am--she. You may well look surprised, for there is little in my haggard
+face and wasted form to recall that once innocent girl. You remember, I
+presume, my engagement to your brother Aurelius--excuse my faltering,
+sir, for, even at this distance of time, I cannot speak of your dead
+brother without emotion. It is not necessary to recall to your memory
+the details of your brother's conduct to me, and how he afterward
+married--another--and moved to this city. This early portion of my
+unfortunate career is well known to you, as it was to all the people of
+our little village."
+
+Here the strange visitor paused, and coughed. The cough was dry and
+hollow.
+
+She continued: "I think I may say that I was amiable and good enough, as
+a child. But your brother's desertion changed my whole nature. I dwelt
+upon one thought--revenge. I shudder as I confess it, but, for months, I
+meditated taking the life of the man who had wronged me. I came to this
+city twice, and lay in wait for him; but my heart faltered, and, thank
+God! I did not commit that crime. Soon, Heaven interposed--so it seemed
+to me at that wicked time--to help on my work of vengeance. Your
+brother's wife died, giving birth to a female child. I used to ride into
+the city twice a week regularly after this, and watch for him near his
+place of business, that I might gloat on his pale, unhappy face. I see
+the look of horror with which you receive this part of my confession;
+but you will bear in mind, sir, that I am hero to tell the truth,
+concealing nothing. You remember, sir, the old lines about a woman
+scorned? I, sir, can bear witness to their awful truth."
+
+Another fit of coughing here interrupted her. At length she resumed, in
+a feebler voice: "I must hasten while I can talk at all. One day, while
+I was watching near your brother's house for his appearance, the door
+opened, and a servant appeared, with a child in her arms--his child. The
+servant walked down the street, and I followed her, unobserved, until
+she came to Washington Parade Ground. She entered the park, and took a
+seat near the fountain. I sat down on a bench near her. It was not long
+before I made the girl's acquaintance, and had the child in my arms,
+caressing it with well-counterfeited kindness. Suddenly, the girl
+recollected that she had left the street door of the house unlocked, and
+was afraid that the house, having not a soul in it, would be robbed
+during her absence. She was so much troubled about it, that she asked me
+to hold the child--then about a year old--until she could go and lock up
+the house, and return. A horrible suggestion came into my mind, and I
+took the child in my arms. The servant was no sooner out of my sight,
+than I rose, and, clasping the child tightly, walked rapidly in the
+opposite direction. When I had got out of the park, among the side
+streets near North River, I ran until I was tired, turning at every
+corner, to avoid pursuit. My plan was clear from the moment that the
+child was left in my charge. It was, to give her into the keeping of
+some stranger, and so rob the widowed father of his only child. It was a
+scheme worthy of the lost and wretched woman that I then was."
+
+A fit of coughing here set in, interrupting the narrative for several
+minutes. Marcus offered his strange guest a glass of water. She sipped
+it, until her cough was checked.
+
+"I wished to make a full and minute statement, sir; but this cough again
+warns me to be very brief. In a word, then, I had not gone far, before I
+saw a German woman--a neat, elderly person--sitting on the stoop of her
+house. An impulse moved me to leave the child with her. I accosted her,
+but she answered me in German, saying that she could not speak English.
+Hardly knowing what I did, I mounted the steps, and placed the child in
+her arms, first kissing it. Then I tossed my pocket book, containing
+about twenty dollars, into her lap, and, without another word or act,
+ran off again. As I drew near the next corner, I turned, and saw the
+German woman still sitting on the stoop, looking at the child, and then
+at the money, and then at my flying form, in perfect amazement.
+
+"Well, I returned to my country home in safety. Next day, I saw in the
+New York papers a reward of five hundred dollars for the recovery of the
+child, and the same amount for the arrest of the woman who stole it. My
+person was described, according to the recollection of the servant, but
+so imperfectly that I could not be identified. In two weeks I visited
+the city again, found the house where I had left the child--for I had
+remembered, even in my haste, the street and the number. The poor little
+thing was well, and had learned to love its new mother, who, in turn,
+seemed to love it as well as her own two children. I kissed the child,
+left more money with the German woman, and fled again to my home. These
+visits I repeated from week to week for six months, without detection.
+The German woman supposed that I was the mother of the child, but knew
+there was a secret, and did not seek to disturb it. At the end of the
+six months, your--your--brother died." (There was here a slight quaver
+in her voice, almost instantly passing away.) "Soon after this, my
+mother died, and the last of our family estate was spent on her burial."
+(Another tremor in the voice, but brief. The woman seemed to have
+perfect control of her feelings.)
+
+"Fortunately, I was qualified to earn my living as a seamstress. I went
+to the city, advertised for such a place, and obtained it. I visited the
+child secretly, sometimes, and left money for its support and clothing.
+But the idea of detection and exposure troubled me greatly. One day, I
+read an advertisement from a married couple who had no children,
+offering to adopt a girl under two years of age. I answered the
+advertisement, and thus became acquainted with--"
+
+"I anticipate the disclosure," said Marcus. "Mr. Minford! And the poor,
+dear child is my niece. Heaven be praised, she is found at last!"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+POSSIBLE LOVE.
+
+"You have guessed rightly. Miss Minford is your niece. The proofs will
+be found in this packet. They are articles of clothing, taken from the
+child as fast as new ones were supplied, to prevent its identification,
+bearing the initials of Helen Wilkeson. I preserved them, with the vague
+idea of benefiting her by them, some day. I have seen the child by
+stealth a few times since I gave her to Mr. and Mrs. Minford, but never
+called at their house. It was agreed between us that I should never make
+myself known as the child's mother, and that they should never seek to
+learn my name and history. I acted as seamstress in several families in
+this city, until, about five years ago, I obtained an engagement in a
+family in New Jersey, living in the very town where that unlucky
+panorama was exhibited. It happened, as you know, that you and I rode in
+the same car from New York, where I had been on a shopping excursion. I
+recognized and was profoundly impressed with your resemblance to your
+brother. Learning that you were connected with the panorama, I attended
+the exhibition, that I might observe you more closely. There you were
+arrested on the charge of murdering Mr. Minford--of which, I again say,
+I always believed that you were totally innocent. You may remember that
+a woman fainted away. I was she. The sudden recollection of those two
+names--Wilkeson and Minford--in such a connection, was too much even for
+my nerves. I read the trial with fearful interest, and rejoiced in your
+release from the accusation. Providence at last seemed to point out the
+way to make all the reparation for my crime. I should have done it
+immediately after your acquittal, had I not seen by the papers that a
+wealthy lady--Mrs. Crull--had given your niece a home in her family. I
+postponed this act of justice from one week to another, until my failing
+health warned me that it could not be put off with safety longer. I
+thank Heaven that I have had strength and resolution to do it at last."
+
+"This act of atonement, madam," said Marcus, "entitles you to my respect
+and sympathy. If you ever need a friend, I trust you will do me the
+favor of calling on me."
+
+"I thank you," she replied; "but I have means enough to support me for
+the remainder of my days, which are numbered. The family in which I
+live, little knowing my true history, are very kind to me."
+
+The protracted conversation had not been closed too soon. A violent
+cough seized upon the poor woman's frame, and shook it like a leaf. When
+it had ceased, Marcus observed that her lips were streaked with blood.
+
+He begged to send for a doctor, but she would not have one, and rose to
+take her leave.
+
+Marcus insisted, however, upon ordering a carriage for her conveyance to
+the New Jersey Railroad Depot, and she at length consented to receive
+that kindness from him.
+
+To the driver he whispered words of caution, and instructed him to take
+the lady to a physician, in case she was ill on the journey; and, if so,
+to report, immediately thereafter, to him. He then shook her hand
+frankly, and begged her again to remember that he should always be
+her friend.
+
+She smiled sadly, as she replied: "Again and again I thank you, sir; but
+it is useless to accept your kind offers, for we are meeting for the
+last time."
+
+The carriage was driven slowly away.
+
+The poor woman's word's were true; and Marcus never saw her more.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III
+
+UNCLE AND NIECE.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson had seen Pet but twice since the inquest--once in Mrs.
+Crull's carriage, and once afoot, on the opposite side of the street. He
+was delicately conscious that she regarded him with distrust or
+aversion; and, raising his hat politely to her, bowed, and passed on. He
+had expressly enjoined upon Tiffles and Overtop, in the communications
+which they had with her relative to the "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener,"
+not to mention his name. He shrank from appearing to force himself on
+her notice.
+
+The discovery of her real parentage had modified Marcus's sensitiveness
+somewhat. He was now no longer in the ridiculous position of a
+middle-aged, hopeless lover, but was an uncle, with a charming niece
+whom he could honorably love like a father. His first impulse, after the
+departure of the mysterious woman, was to hurry around to Mrs. Crull's
+house, unpack his bundle of proofs, and embrace the dear child with
+avuncular affection.
+
+Upon him, glowing with this impulse, came the calm, deep Overtop, to
+whom Marcus told the strange story. Overtop listened with lawyer-like
+composure, and, when Marcus had finished, asked for the bundle. "The
+story is likely enough," said he, "but a lawyer wants to know all
+the proofs."
+
+So saying, he removed from the parcel the string which bound it, and
+which, with the wrapping cloth, had become yellow with age, and brought
+to view a baby's long frock, and a cap made of the finest materials, and
+heavily fringed with lace, and a pair of tarnished golden morocco shoes
+of fairy dimensions. Upon an edge of the dress were daintily wrought, in
+needle work, the initials, H.W. A separate package contained extracts
+from three daily papers, giving accounts of the "Mysterious
+Disappearance of a Child," and an advertisement, signed Aurelius
+Wilkeson, offering five hundred dollars for the recovery of his
+daughter Helen, and describing the circumstances of the abduction so far
+as they were known, and the articles of dress which the infant wore
+at the time.
+
+"So far, so good," said Overtop; "but it now remains to identify the
+original owner of these baby clothes with Miss Minford. We must find
+some old friends or acquaintances of the late inventor, who can testify
+that he adopted a child during the year 18--."
+
+Marcus, whose memory was tenacious of names, recollected that Mr.
+Minford, in his few confidential moments, had told him of several
+persons whom he had known in more prosperous days.
+
+With these memoranda to guide him, Overtop went resolutely to work, and,
+in two days, found four old friends of Mr. and Mrs. Minford, who
+remembered the very year when they adopted an infant child. It was the
+same year that the daughter of Aurelius Wilkeson had disappeared.
+Overtop, being a Notary Public, took the affidavits of these persons as
+he went along.
+
+Here Overtop would have stopped, and left Marcus to break the important
+news of his new-found relationship to the young lady. But Marcus, who
+had a perfect horror of scenes, begged his friend to do this troublesome
+piece of diplomacy for him, but promised, when it was done, to appear at
+Mrs. Crull's in his new character of uncle.
+
+Overtop performed the difficult task with success. He found Pet not
+altogether unprepared for the discovery. She recalled to mind several
+conversations and significant glances between Mr. and Mrs. Minford (the
+latter died in Pet's twelfth year), in which there was an evident
+allusion to the mystery of her birth. She remembered how often persons
+had expressed surprise that she did not resemble her supposed father or
+mother in the least. She remembered that, on those occasions, Mrs.
+Minford had been much disconcerted; and Mr. Minford, remarking that it
+was a freak of nature, he presumed, had always seemed desirous of
+changing the subject. She remembered that this strange want of
+resemblance to either of her reputed parents had often been a puzzle to
+her before Mrs. Minford's death.
+
+With regard to Lucy Anserhoff, and the causes which prompted her to the
+abduction of the child. Overtop said nothing; because, among other
+reasons, Marcus, true to his solemn pledge, had told him nothing. He
+explained that the crime had been committed by a person who had formerly
+been a servant in her father's family; and that she had made full
+confession to her uncle, only on condition that her name should never be
+mentioned to any human being.
+
+Mrs. Crull, who to a practical mind united a love of the romantic and
+marvellous, accepted Overtop's proofs even more readily than Pet. She
+said she had observed, at the inquest, a wonderful resemblance between
+Mr. Wilkeson and her darling, especially in the nose and eyes. Overtop,
+being appealed to to mark the likeness, took an oracular three-quarters
+view of the young lady, and said that the word "niece" was written
+on her face.
+
+"He's your uncle, my dear," said Mrs. Crull. "There a'n't no doubt o'
+that. But don't forget that I'm your mother, now."
+
+Pet kissed Mrs. Crull, and placed her little hand confidingly in the
+large, ineradicably red hand of her protectress.
+
+"Now that Marcus Wilkeson stands in the relation of uncle to you," said
+Overtop, "there is no harm in telling you something." He then broke to
+her the secret of her uncle's important aid in the affair of the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener"--the sole credit of which had always been
+attributed by Pet and Mrs. Crull to Wesley Tiffles and Overtop,
+agreeably to the wish of Marcus.
+
+"What a fool I've been," said Mrs. Crull, "to feel the least doubt about
+this excellent man! It was very weak of me, I s'pose, Mr. Overtop; but I
+don't mind tellin' you, that, after what had 'curred, I thought that Mr.
+Wilkeson's quaintance with Pet had better be stopped. I take all the
+'sponsibility of it. We must make it up, by thinkin' all the more
+of him now."
+
+At the suggestion of Overtop, a servant, with Mrs. Crull's carriage, was
+now sent for Marcus, and soon returned with him.
+
+When he entered the room, Pet rose, and walked toward him, half
+hesitating. Her face was very pale, and her lips quivered. "My dear
+uncle!" she said, and turned her sweet face up to be kissed.
+
+Marcus, to whom the probable character of his reception had been a
+distressing subject of conjecture, was delighted at this frank,
+affectionate greeting, and stooped and imprinted an uncle's kiss on the
+young girl's brow. It was a pleasant way out of an embarrassment.
+
+The conflicting emotions of the hour were too much for Pet; and she
+tottered to Mrs. Crull's arms, and wept for a few moments.
+
+"You are her uncle, Mr. Wilkeson," said Mrs. Crull, extending her red
+right hand, while, with her left, she smoothed Pet's thick brown hair,
+"but I am her mother." Mrs. Crull seized upon this early opportunity to
+give notice that her rights as adopted parent were not to be abridged.
+
+"And happy she is in having such a mother, my dear Mrs. Crull," said
+Marcus.
+
+A quick ring, as of a familiar visitor, was heard at the door. The
+servant ushered in Bog. He was much changed since his last presentation
+to the reader. Six months of worldly polish, of private tutoring, and of
+a strong desire to appear well in the eyes of one he loved, had turned
+the clumsy boy into the quiet but stylish young gentleman. He had given
+up the bill-posting business, not because he was sick of it, or ashamed
+of it, but because old Van Quintem loved his adopted son so well, that
+he could not spare him from his side. Bog passed the greater portion of
+every day with him, rambling through the streets, or riding to the
+suburbs in the old family carriage, or reading the dear old books to
+him. Bog read well now, and had learned to love those repositories of
+wit and wisdom with almost as keen a relish as the venerable
+white-headed listener. This was another bond of affection between the
+old gentleman and himself.
+
+At Bog's entrance. Pet looked up, and showed the sparkling tears in her
+eyes. A deep shade of anxiety passed over the young man's face, and he
+looked around for an explanation.
+
+The prompt Overtop was ready to give it; and, in a few moments, Bog was
+enlightened with the great discovery.
+
+"And Pet has been crying a little because she is so happy--that's all,"
+added Mrs. Crull. "Sit down here, Bog."
+
+Mrs. Crull made room for him on the other end of the sofa where she was
+sitting--her left hand still smoothing the soft brown hair of her
+adopted child.
+
+Bog took the seat, and smiled across the good lady's broad figure to
+Pet, who smiled back at him again.
+
+This expressive exchange of glances was not lost on Marcus. He instantly
+saw, what he had not divined before, that the devotion, the
+self-sacrifice, the constant, unswerving love of the boy, had at last
+sounded its echo in the bosom of the maiden. As he swiftly contrasted
+the manly, athletic figure of the young man, with the delicate beauty of
+his niece, he thought how well they were adapted to each other; and
+wondered that he could ever have been so blind and conceited as to
+suppose that a nervous old bachelor like himself could win the heart of
+that fresh and youthful image of loveliness. And how thankful he then
+was that he had never, by a single word, hinted at the mad love which he
+once felt for her.
+
+He had no cause to blush now!
+
+
+
+BOOK FOURTEENTH.
+
+HAPPY DAYS.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+OWNERS OF THE BEAUTIFUL.
+
+The world and all its inhabitants had rolled round to another fragrant
+spring. The buds were bursting in city parks and gardens, and birds
+twittered in the dusty air. Every happy heart said to itself, "This
+green, and these opening roses, this music of the birds, this shining
+day, this temperate breeze, are all mine, and made for me."
+
+There were two young persons, one sweet morning in May, who experienced
+a delightful sense of that universal proprietorship of the Beautiful.
+They were a couple who appeared to be expressly made for each other; for
+the young man was tall and broad chested, the young woman short, and
+delicately formed; his eyes were black, hers blue; he was calm,
+resolute, deliberate in every movement, she quick and impulsive. There
+never was a clearer case of mutual fitness by virtue of entire
+dissimilarity.
+
+Any one could see that they loved each other, and that, if they were not
+married, they were engaged--for her little hand was entwined most
+trustingly about his muscular arm, and she leaned toward him with that
+gentle inclination which seems to be a magnetism of the heart.
+
+"Are you happy, my own Pet?" asked the young man, looking proudly down
+at the beautiful face beside him.
+
+"Happy! dear Bog--for I _will_ always call you Bog. You know I am!" Her
+blue eyes filled with tears.
+
+If excess of happiness had not choked her voice, she would have asked
+Bog if he thought she could be other than perfectly happy in the love of
+her adopted mother, in the love of her dear uncle--who was at once a
+father and brother in his tender solicitudes--in the love of that
+darling old gentleman, Myndert Van Quintem, and in one other love, which
+it was not necessary to mention.
+
+But Bog knew that she was supremely happy, and he needed no such
+elaborate answer. He also knew that he possessed the first, fresh, and
+only love that she had ever cherished. All the events in connection with
+her Greenpoint adventure, both before and after it, proved that she had
+never loved young Van Quintem, and that her sentiments toward him were
+only those of gratitude for his supposed saving of her life, and an
+innocent, childlike confidence in his good intentions.
+
+The lovers sauntered down the street slowly, as if they would protract
+the walk. Not another word was said. Passing a garden full of roses, Bog
+reached through the fence, and plucked a full-blown white one and handed
+it to Pet. She eagerly took it, and pinned it to the bosom of her dress.
+
+"Here we are, dearest; and I am almost ashamed to show myself to uncle,
+for I am such a stranger," said Bog, breaking the silence, as they stood
+at the foot of the memorable bell tower. "Hallo, Uncle Ith!" he shouted,
+looking upward.
+
+The old gentleman thrust his white head out of an open window at the
+top, and said, "All right. Come up."
+
+The door at the foot of the tower was open, and the young couple
+proceeded to comply with the invitation. Bog led the way, and gently
+dragged Pet from step to step, with much laughter on his part, and many
+charming little feminine screams on her party until the trap door was
+reached. Uncle Ith had combed his hair with his five fingers, retied
+his old black cravat, and put on his coat, to receive them. He smiled
+through the trap door, as they came in sight, and said, "Be very careful
+of the young lady, Bog. Mind, now, how the young lady steps."
+
+Bog jumped through the trap door into the cupola. Then he lowered a hand
+to Pet, and Uncle Ith lent her the same assistance, and the two raised
+the precious burden to a place of safety. Uncle Ith, after he had been
+introduced to Pet, proudly, by his nephew, looked at her for a moment in
+silent admiration. He had never seen her before, but he knew her well
+from Bog's descriptions (hurriedly communicated by Bog when they had met
+in the street), and said to himself that the boy had done no more than
+justice to her rare beauty.
+
+Then Uncle Ith looked at his nephew. "Ah, Bog," said he, shaking his
+head at him, "what changes Time does make! It seems only a few days ago
+that you was a little scrub of a chap, runnin' 'round town and pickin'
+up your livin'. And a very good and honest livin' you picked up, too.
+Now, here you are, a nicely dressed, tall, handsome young man, with a
+snug little fortun' all of your own earnin', not to mention your bein'
+the adopted son of that splendid old gentleman, Myndert Van Quintem.
+And, last and best, you are goin' to be married to this dear young lady
+to-morrer."
+
+Pet blushed; and Bog said, "That is why we are here to-day, dear uncle.
+We must have you at the wedding."
+
+Uncle Ith faltered. "Me at Mr. Van Quintem's! I should feel like a fish
+out o' water." He said nothing about the antiquated blue coat with brass
+buttons, the short, black trousers, and the figured satin vest, hanging
+up in a closet at home; but he thought of them, and what a stiff figure
+he would cut in them.
+
+"But you must come, Uncle Ith!" said Pet, with her sweetest smile. "I
+ask it as a particular favor."
+
+"You are my only living relative, you know, uncle," added Bog.
+
+"We should not be happy, if you were away," said Pet, placing her hand
+confidingly on the old man's shoulder. Young persons always took to the
+good old man in this spontaneous way.
+
+The entreaties of the couple, and the continual iteration of that name
+by which he loved to be called--"Uncle Ith"--finally overcame his
+objections. He reconciled himself to the prospect of the blue coat,
+short trousers, and gaudy vest, and solemnly promised to attend
+the wedding.
+
+This important matter having been settled, Uncle Ith pointed out to Pet
+all the interesting objects to be seen from the tower, and adjusted the
+spyglass for her, and gave her near views of Governor's Island, the
+Palisades, and other remote objects. He also explained to her the
+process of striking the bell by means of the long iron lever, and told
+her that, if she would wait there long enough, she could hear how the
+big chap sounded ten feet away. Pet put her hands to her ears, in
+anticipation of the stunning noise, and laughingly said that she didn't
+think she would wait long.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+THE LAST OF A MYSTERY.
+
+After Pet had looked at all the objects of interest visible from the
+bell tower--Uncle Ith pointing them out with the pride of an owner--Bog
+called Pet aside, and said, "Now, Uncle Ith, I have something to show
+her that I used to think most interesting of all."
+
+Pet rested her hand upon his arm, and gazed through the southeastern
+window, in the direction indicated by Bog's forefinger.
+
+"Right there," said he, "midway between those two tall chimneys, and a
+trifle south of the line of that steeple--the last two windows in the
+upper story of that old house--do you see them?"
+
+Pet looked along his outstretched arm, to get the precise direction,
+and then said, hurriedly, "It is my old home."
+
+The sight of those familiar windows, in which the calico curtains still
+hung, recalled the horrid vision of that dreadful night. Pet turned
+pale, and shuddered. "Let us look elsewhere, Bog," said she.
+
+"I beg your pardon, dearest; but I wanted to tell you how many hours I
+had spent in this cupola, day and night, gazing at those two windows,
+and feeling, oh, so happy! if I could but catch a glimpse of you or your
+shadow. But I never told Uncle Ith about it."
+
+Uncle Ith had not overheard this conversation, but he had followed with
+his eyes the direction pointed out by Bog. As the young couple stepped
+back from the window, he said:
+
+"I see some strange sights occasionally, my children" (he was fond of
+calling young people his children), "I can tell you. There are a couple
+of windows, in the upper story of that old brick house, between the two
+big chimneys, that used to interest me some."
+
+"We see them," said Bog and Pet.
+
+"About five years back, I began to notice lights burnin' in that room,
+long after all other lights, except the street lamps, was put out. Of
+course, this attracted my attention, and I used to feel a queer kind of
+pleasure in looking into the room with my spyglass, and wonderin' what
+was goin' on there. The curtains were usually drawn over the lower
+sashes; but, this tower bein' fifty or sixty feet higher than the house,
+I could look over the top of the curtains, and see somethin'. An old
+man, tall and slim, and a young girl, 'peared to be the only folks that
+lived there. Are you sick, young lady?" said he, observing that Pet
+looked pale.
+
+"Oh, no; I am not sick--only a little fatigued."
+
+"What a brute I was, not to offer you a chair! Now do sit down, young
+lady."
+
+Pet did so, and Uncle Ith resumed:
+
+"The old gentleman was a machinist, I s'pose, for I used to see his
+shadow on the wall, goin' through the motions of filin', sawin', and
+hammerin', though I could never guess what he was workin' on. I have
+known him sometimes to be at this queer business till daylight. For
+three years the strange old gentleman never missed a night at his work.
+I fear you are not quite well, young lady. Take a glass of water."
+
+Pet sipped from the proffered glass, and declared that she was much
+better now,
+
+"One night, about two years ago, I took a look into this room with my
+spyglass. I generally didn't do it until three or four o'clock in the
+mornin', when all the other lights in the neighborhood was out. But, on
+that partickler night, about eleven o'clock, I happened to observe that
+one of the window curtains which covered the lower sash was left partly
+undrawn. This had never occurred before, and so I brought my glass to
+bear on the room at once. A tall gentleman, whose face I had often seen
+movin' in the room over the top o' the curtain, was just in the act of
+takin' his departure, which he did without shakin' hands. The old man
+then went to his place at the other window, and tackled to his work
+again. He had been at it about twenty minutes, when a bar, or rod, which
+stuck up above the curtain, and was somehow connected with his work,
+fell forward with a quick motion, as if it was jerked away. The old man
+stooped, picked it up, and fixed it in its place again. His face, as
+well as I could see through my glass in the night time, at that
+distance, showed a wonderful amount of surprise and astonishment--at the
+fall of this rod or bar, I s'pose. He then seemed to be filin' on
+somethin', and afterward stooped down, as if to put it into some part of
+the machine, or whatever it was. Jest at that minute the Post Office
+struck, and I put down my glass, and turned my head toward the sound, to
+catch the district. It struck seven. I jumped to the lever, and started
+the old bell for seven, too. As I was strikin' the first round, my eyes
+happened to rest on the strange window again. The old man was not
+standin' there. The bar, or rod, had fallen out of its place again, I
+s'posed, and I expected every minute to see the old man appear at the
+window, and fix it again. But he didn't show himself any more that
+night--and (which is the curious part of my story) I've never seen him
+since. Whether he dropped dead from heart disease, I can't guess; but
+certain I am that he is dead, for--"
+
+Poor Pet here exhibited such signs of faintness, that Bog, who had been
+leaning against the edge of the window, gazing at the well-known window
+with a strange fascination, sprang to her side, and instantly bathed her
+brow with water from Uncle Ith's old pitcher, near at hand. This
+restored her. "Be calm, dearest," said Bog.
+
+"What--what is the matter with the young lady?" asked Uncle Ith, in
+great trepidation. "Shall I run for a doctor?"
+
+"No, Uncle Ith; no doctor. But we won't talk any more about this strange
+room at present. It affects Miss Wilkeson's nerves."
+
+"The shock is past, dear Bog," said she, "and I can bear to hear
+everything."
+
+"But you must promise to control yoursell, darling," said Bog, tenderly.
+
+"One question, Uncle Ith," said he. "How long a time were your eyes off
+the room, after the first stroke for the Seventh District?"
+
+"Not more than three seconds."
+
+"And you are sure that there was nobody in the room?"
+
+"Certain; for I must have seen him enter, or go out."
+
+"Then, Uncle Ith, you have cleared up a great mystery."
+
+"What! What mystery?"
+
+"The death of Mr. Minford, the inventor, my old friend, and the
+protector and guardian of Miss Wilkeson. He lived in that very room! He
+was at work on a perpetual-motion machine! It was operated, somehow, by
+weights! It started suddenly, when you saw that rod, or lever, fall to
+the floor! Mr. Minford put the rod in its place, and made some little
+improvement in the works! The machine started again at a moment when
+your eyes were turned away! The rod fell with greater violence, struck
+the inventor on the head, and killed him! That is the whole story; and
+stupid we have all been not to have guessed it before."
+
+Nature furnished her own sweet relief to Pet's pent-up emotions. She
+burst into tears. "Thank Heaven," said she, "it is all plain now!"
+
+Pet had not whispered it to Mrs. Crull, or Bog, or her uncle, or to any
+other living soul, but the mystery of that awful night had hung over her
+young mind like a pall, which in vain she had tried to lift.
+
+"What a blockhead I am," cried Uncle Ith, "not to take the papers! If I
+had only taken the papers, now, I should ha' read all about that affair,
+and might ha' guessed that the man who was s'posed to be murdered was
+the man I had seen workin' in that room for three years. Then I should
+ha' offered myself as a witness, and might ha' thrown some light on the
+business. I'll 'scribe for a paper to-day, instead of trustin' to
+hearsay for the news."
+
+"And a very neglectful fellow was I," said Bog, "not to have called here
+and seen you, after that sad affair. But the truth was, that Pet went to
+live with her best of friends, Mrs. Crull, and I had no longer a desire
+to look at the room from your bell tower. In fact," Bog added, with a
+smile, "the tower has not been quite as interesting for two years past
+as it used to be. If I had come up here at any time since Mr. Minford's
+death, I should probably have told you of the supposed murder, and
+pointed out those windows to you. But--"
+
+"But you forgot all about your old uncle. Ha! I understand. Well, I
+forgive you, seein' what there was to 'sturb your recollections." Uncle
+Ith looked affectionately at Pet, who smiled and blushed through
+her tears.
+
+The old man continued: "I 'member once when we met in the street, about
+two years ago--"
+
+"I used to come around this way, you must know, Uncle Ith, in order to
+meet you, two or three times a week."
+
+"I give you credit for that, Bog. You never disowned your poor old
+uncle. But, as I was sayin', I 'member one time when we met, that you
+told me somethin' about the murder of somebody of your 'quaintance. But
+I didn't take no partickler interest in it, because I didn't know any of
+the parties concerned. And, of course, I didn't dream that poor Mr.
+Minford was the man I had seen workin' away there for three years. But
+the main fault is mine, because I don't take the papers. I see, now,
+that every man ought to take the papers--if only as a duty to his feller
+man." Uncle Ith coughed, as one who utters a maxim of great moral depth.
+
+It was then agreed, at Bog's suggestion, that Uncle Ith, accompanied by
+him, should call at Overtop's office, at early business hours (when
+Uncle Ith was off duty), next day, and consult upon the best course to
+be adopted to make his testimony public, and set the mystery of Mr.
+Minford's death forever at rest.
+
+This having been done, Bog and Pet withdrew, and had hardly reached the
+foot of the tower, when the musical thunder of the great bell announced
+the constantly reiterated story of a fire in the Seventh--that most
+combustible of all the city districts.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+LOVE CROWNED.
+
+Late on a fair afternoon of May, wedding guests began to assemble at old
+Van Quintem's house. The old gentleman had been out of society many
+years; and he improved this happy occasion to bring together his few
+surviving relatives, and friends of his former business days.
+
+Heavy antique carriages rolled up to the door, with retired merchants
+and their wives. The retired merchants were of a pattern not altogether
+extinct in New York, who, at the ages of sixty years and upward, had
+cleared their skirts of business, and settled down to a calm retrospect
+of the past, and serene anticipations of the future. They were
+evidently destined for a good old age, and had fat pocket books to help
+them through. The proper place to look for this class of retired
+merchants is on the tax books, and not in public assemblies, or among
+the Directing Boards of benevolent institutions. They are good,
+charitable souls; but, having got out of business, they desire to keep
+out of it literally, leaving to a younger generation the task of
+managing men and affairs.
+
+A more stylish vehicle deposited at the door a bachelor Bank President,
+who was not only the old personal friend of the host, but his trusted
+adviser in business affairs. The parlor of the ---- Bank was one of the
+few places that old Van Quintem still visited in the bustling haunts of
+the city; and to old Van Quintem's house the bachelor Bank President
+made monthly pilgrimages of friendship. He was a handsome man of fifty,
+with long white hair, which matched beautifully with his yet ruddy
+cheeks, and a figure portly and full of strength. Nobody but himself
+knew why so eligible a man remained a bachelor.
+
+In a humpbacked chaise drawn by an exemplary horse, there rode a fat and
+pleasant old gentleman, who was uncomfortably swathed about the neck
+with a white cravat. He crawled from his narrow coop with the nimbleness
+of one who is on professional business. He was followed by his wife, a
+little woman, who was the mother of ten children from two to twenty
+years of age--just two years apart, and all strongly resembling their
+father. This fat, pleasant old gentleman was the old-fashioned minister
+of the old-fashioned church to which Mr. Van Quintem had belonged for
+forty years. The little woman was his second wife; and there was a first
+crop of children, who had been safely launched on the world for many
+years, and were doing extremely well.
+
+The sole surviving relatives of old Van Quintem were three elderly
+ladies, who, by some contagious fatality, remained unmarried. After
+pining romantically over their doom for some time, they had settled down
+to the conviction that they were much happier single than wedded, and
+that they had escaped a great many dangers and disappointments--which
+was unquestionably true. It was really pleasant for them to reflect that
+the snug property which their father left them had not been squandered
+upon designing husbands, but had been kept, improved, and added to,
+until it was one of the prettiest estates on Staten Island. These ladies
+were first cousins of old Van Quintem, and had an odd habit of staying
+at home. They came to New York always on important business, which could
+not be transacted by any one else, four times a year; and, on those
+occasions, paid state visits to old Van Quintem, who reciprocated the
+civility by calling on them, in a ceremonial way, twice every summer.
+
+Uncle Ith came on foot; and wore his old blue coat with brass buttons,
+his flowered vest, and shining trousers so awkwardly, that people who
+did not know him stared at him as at a strange spectacle. People--and
+they were many--who did know him, stared at him with a still greater
+surprise, wondering what extraordinary event in his history was about to
+occur. Uncle Ith felt the additional embarrassment of fame, or
+notoriety; for an affidavit, prepared by Overtop, giving the full
+particulars of his observations from the bell tower, had been published
+in all the city papers that morning. Before noon, Uncle Ith had been
+waited on by six newspaper reporters, to whom he had furnished
+particulars of his early life; and had promised to sit for his
+photograph, for the use of an illustrated weekly, on the following day.
+For all these reasons, added to his natural modesty, he pulled the door
+bell with a feeling of profound regret, which was followed by a strange
+desire to run around the corner. Before this desire could have been
+gratified, the door was opened by a servant, and Uncle Ith was
+ushered in.
+
+The anticipated awkwardness of an introduction to old Van Quintem, was
+prevented by the approach of that gentleman before his name was
+announced.
+
+"Welcome! welcome!" said he, shaking him by the hand with Dutch fervor.
+"I know you from Bog's description, you see. Your statement in the
+morning papers has lifted a load from several hearts, I can tell you.
+Bog will be delighted to see you. He was beginning to be afraid you
+would not come. Hallo, Bog!" said, the good old gentleman, shouting up
+the stairs; "here is Uncle Ith."
+
+The bridegroom bounded down the stairs with boyish impetuosity, looking
+so fine that Uncle Ith hardly knew him. It was difficult to realize that
+the ungainly, ignorant boy of a few years back, had become this
+nice-looking, graceful young gentleman. Thus readily does the rough
+diamond of a good heart and brain, under the guiding hands of Ambition
+and Love, take its polish from contact with the world and with society!
+
+"Dear Uncle Ith!" said the bridegroom.
+
+"Happy to see you, Uncle Ith!" exclaimed Fayette Overtop, who, with
+Marcus Wilkeson and Matthew Maltboy, had been drawn from the second
+floor at the mention of his name.
+
+Marcus had not before seen Uncle Ith, though he had been thinking of him
+all day. The publication of the old man's affidavit was an entire
+surprise to Marcus--Overtop and Maltboy having said nothing to him about
+it. Other people read the document with interest, because it solved a
+mystery. But to Marcus it wore the profounder, vastly greater importance
+of clearing the last shadow of foul suspicion from his name. It may be
+unnecessary to say, that it also gave rise to learned and interesting,
+but profitless discussions, in several of the papers, upon the
+possibilities of perpetual motion--which lasted until the explosion of a
+steam boiler under the pavement turned every editor to the consideration
+of steam boilers, their nature and habits, the rights of owners and of
+the public, and the necessity of stringent legislation for the better
+management of those subterranean powers of good and evil.
+
+Upon being introduced to Uncle Ith, Marcus gave the old man's hand a
+warm pressure, but said nothing. But Uncle Ith saw in his eyes an
+expression of the deepest gratitude, and he knew what it meant; for he
+had read the report of the inquest at Overtop's office, and there
+learned, for the first time, the unhappy connection of Marcus Wilkeson
+with the Minford affair.
+
+Maltboy, who, being one of the appointed groomsmen of the day, was in
+extraordinary spirits, was profuse in his congratulations to Uncle Ith,
+and insisted, rather unnecessarily, upon introducing him to the retired
+merchants and the bachelor Bank President. They had all read his
+affidavit, and regarded him with undisguised interest.
+
+For a man who has always been a lamb in his shyness and
+self-depreciation, to find himself suddenly transformed into a lion, is
+a cause of no little embarrassment. Uncle Ith was so much flustered by
+all these tokens of popularity, that he could not utter an articulate
+word, but only mumble, and wipe his heated brow. He wished that the
+usages of society would permit him to take off his coat, as he did in
+the bell tower, and be comfortable.
+
+A few more guests arrived, mostly of the ancient order, and a little too
+much of one sort to please a lover of variety. The advent of Mr. Frump,
+with all his impulsive occidental peculiarities of character fresh upon
+him, was a decided relief to the decorous company already assembled in
+the parlors. In less than ten minutes, he was on terms of off-hand
+friendship with everybody, and was telling strange stories of Western
+adventure to a group of eager listeners.
+
+Old Van Quintem received all his guests with that simple cordiality
+which leaves no doubt of a sincere welcome. The common remark was, "How
+well you are looking, Mr. Van Quintem!" And it was very true. Few men at
+seventy could show a figure so straight, cheeks so smooth, and an eye so
+bright. The unavailing sorrow which tenanted his heart two years before,
+had gradually disappeared. From the hour that his son fled abashed from
+his presence, he had not seen or heard of him, and had at last come to
+regard him as dead--though the old gentleman could not have given a good
+reason for that singular belief, except that his son had been a
+constant cause of sorrow and trouble to him when alive. He preferred to
+think of the lost son not as the ripened villain, but as the innocent
+child prattling upon its mother's knee. This mental picture filled a
+select chamber of the old man's memory. But the affection and
+reverential duty of a son had been supplied by the boy Bog; and, in the
+virtuous character and filial love of that young man, he saw what the
+innocent child might have grown to, had all his prayers and tears
+been answered.
+
+When old Van Quintem's wishes were consulted with regard to the wedding,
+he had but one favor to ask; and that was, that the ceremony might take
+place at his house. It was a whimsical idea, he said, but he would like
+to see his old home gay once more, as it used to be years ago.
+"Besides," said he, "I am rheumatic, and might not be able to attend the
+wedding, if held elsewhere."
+
+Mrs. Crull, when she first heard, from the lips of the blushing Pet,
+that Bog had proposed and been accepted, immediately outlined the plan
+of a wedding at her house, which should be something unprecedented in
+point of magnificence. The plan took shape as she thought of it, and she
+had already settled upon the number of invitations, and the other
+principal arrangements, when old Van Quintem's wish was mentioned to
+her. The sacrifice was a great one; and Mrs. Crull would make it only on
+condition that she should superintend the preparations with the same
+freedom as at her own house. Old Van Quintem consented to this, only
+stipulating that he should pay all the bills; and, for over a week
+before the wedding, Mrs. Crull, assisted by that most buxom and busy of
+women, Mrs. Frump, had taken tyrannical possession of the dwelling, and
+made such extraordinary transpositions of the carpets and pictures, and
+other movable property, that old Van Quintem, on surveying the work of
+renovation, hardly recognized the house as his own. The only apartment
+that was not inwardly transformed by these female magicians was the
+library. To that he clung, conscious that both his services and his
+advice were of no value.
+
+The house was soon filled with guests--or rather appeared to be filled,
+for the whole number invited and present was only forty. But forty
+people, moving about uneasily, and expecting something, look like a
+hundred or more. Among them were many whose only claim to an invitation
+was their friendship for the host, or Mrs. Crull, or the bride, and not
+any mental, moral, or physical excellence which entitles them to mention
+in this history.
+
+There were two rooms on the second floor, upon which the interest of
+loungers, male and female, was concentrated.
+
+In one waited the bridegroom, his groomsmen Overtop and Maltboy, Marcus
+Wilkeson and Wesley Tiffles. They were a happy party, and not at all
+frightened at the approaching nuptials. Bog--for such his friends always
+did, should, and will call him--could not have been happier--far from
+it!--if he had held a sceptre in each hand. Overtop was happy in the
+contemplation of his marriage with that most sensible of girls, Miss
+Pillbody, which was set down for the week following. The affair would
+have come off six months before, but for Miss Pillbody's illness,
+happening soon after her mother's death. In consequence of this illness,
+her select school had been given up--never to be revived. Poor Overtop
+did not know how much he loved her, until he saw how near he came to
+losing her. She had completely recovered, was ruddy and pretty with new
+health, and was Pet's first bridesmaid. Overtop thought pleasantly of
+her, and combed back his intractable cowlick. Matthew Maltboy was happy
+because he had taken a serious fancy to Miss Trapper, the second
+bridesmaid, a charming but peculiar girl, and the particular juvenile
+friend of Mrs. Frump. Matthew had met this young lady two or three
+times, and had suffered sweetly from her black eyes. Marcus Wilkeson was
+happy in his contented bachelorhood, in the happiness of his niece and
+of all around him, and in the clearing up of the "Minford enigma."
+Wesley Tiffles was happy because happiness was his constitutional
+disposition, under all circumstances and in all weathers. The arrival of
+Uncle Ith was the only event that had drawn this good-natured party from
+their retreat; and those who watched for their reappearance were
+disappointed.
+
+In the other room, the bride had been dressing for several hours, and
+was still hard at it, under the immediate supervision of the
+indefatigable Mrs. Crull, Mrs. Frump, and the two bridesmaids. Only the
+favored few were admitted to this retreat of mysteries. But they were
+kindly communicative. They brought back minute reports of the appearance
+and condition of the bride elect, in the various stages of her
+enrobement and ornamentation; and there was not a woman in the house who
+did not, every ten minutes, have the image of Helen Wilkeson stamped on
+her mind as accurately as the changeful phases of an eclipse on the
+photographer's plate.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+At the soft, calm, mystic, love-making, marrying twilight hour, the
+bridal party took their stand near the southern end of the great double
+parlor. The forty guests were grouped before them, an audience
+without seats.
+
+Pet was pale, and leaned for support on Bog's arm. He stood firm, erect,
+unblenching, with that instinct of physical strength which one feels
+when the woman that he loves hangs confidingly on his arm. Fayette
+Overtop, with his well-known dislike for conventionalism, was thinking
+how tedious all that formality was, and how much more sensible to be
+married by an alderman or justice of the peace, privately, in two
+minutes. Miss Pillbody did not agree with her future husband on this
+point, and was thinking, at that very moment, what a solemn thing
+marriage was, and with what ceremonious deliberation it ought to be
+entered upon. Matthew Maltboy had had great experience as a groomsman,
+and he speculated with perfect composure on this important question:
+Whether the gentle tremor of Miss Trapper's hand was caused altogether
+by the fluttering novelty of her situation, or partly by the
+love-enkindling contact of their interlocked elbows?
+
+As the six took their chosen positions, and gazed at a particular
+pattern in the carpet, selected by them at a private rehearsal in the
+morning, they were the subject of mental comment by the forty guests.
+The women, looking at the costly dress of the bride, pronounced her
+beautiful. The men, never noticing her dress, but observing her pale
+face and heavy eyes, were not vividly impressed with her loveliness. Bog
+was admired by all, and envied by none to whom his history was known.
+The old ladies took a mild maternal interest in him, because he was an
+orphan; and the young ladies thought extremely well of him, because he
+was a strong, gallant, handsome fellow. Overtop was regarded with
+curiosity, as the reputed hero of the Slapman scandal. Matthew Maltboy
+was universally condemned as too fat, and, with that brief criticism,
+was dismissed. Miss Pillbody was pronounced "a little proud," because
+she stood straight, with shoulders thrown back, which was her usual
+attitude. Miss Trapper was admitted to be a very modest and diffident
+creature, because she had a slight stoop in the back, which was chronic.
+
+Old Van Quintem stood near the wedding party, and recalled, with fond
+minuteness, the hour when one, about the same age as Pet, and resembling
+her in the freshness of her youthful beauty, had crowned him with
+happiness. Mrs. Crull was close by, and looked at the bride, whom she
+had dressed, with the pride of an artist. Mrs. Frump stood next to her,
+and shared in the same sentiments. Marcus Wilkeson's appointed place was
+somewhere in the neighborhood of the bride; but he shrank away to the
+side of Uncle Ith, who also obstinately clung to the other end of
+the room.
+
+The venerable clergyman stepped into the centre of the small open space
+which had been left in front of the bridal party, and uttered a cough,
+at which signal the buzz of conversation ceased.
+
+The ceremony was very brief and simple--according to the ritual of the
+Dutch Church--and people were married by it before they knew it. The
+minister had received, in advance, a fee of unprecedented size, which
+was, at that moment, lying at the bottom of his wife's pocket, and which
+that good woman had already spent, in imagination, on a new bonnet for
+herself, a new hat for the minister, dresses for the girls, books for
+the boys, and playthings for the baby. If the dimensions of the fee had
+any effect whatever on the mind of the excellent minister, that effect
+was to hurry up the ceremony, and make the two one with the least
+possible delay.
+
+At last the magical, binding words were spoken; and the husband,
+stooping proudly to the not-averted face of his blushing wife, gave her
+the first kiss. And at the same instant a little band of musicians, with
+chosen instruments, secretly stationed in the library, of which the door
+was now thrown open, struck up Mendelssohn's divine Wedding March. As
+its jubilant notes floated through the house, the round of
+congratulations commenced.
+
+Blest Pet! What had she ever done--she thought, so far as giddy
+happiness would allow her to think--to merit all these kisses (of which
+her two shy uncles bestowed two), these benedictions, these tears, and,
+above all, the possession of this noble heart by her side, henceforth to
+be all her own? The exultant peals of the Wedding March--that highest
+expression of triumphal love--but faintly interpreted her joy.
+
+The bridegroom received his full share of the universal good wishes.
+Everybody was pleased with his behavior; and the bachelor Bank
+President, and other members of the old school of gentlemen, pronounced
+him a glorious young fellow, a refreshing contrast to the puny,
+cadaverous youth of the day, and altogether worthy to have flourished
+thirty years ago. The bridesmaids and groomsmen were not neglected
+either; and both Miss Pillbody and Miss Trapper thought that the next
+best thing to getting married, was to assist others in the operation.
+
+As for old Van Quintem, after kissing the bride, and calling Bog his
+son, and giving both of them his blessing, he had retired from the room
+to hide the tears of happiness which not even seventy years of this
+hardening world could keep from his eyes.
+
+For the second time in five minutes, Amos Frump approached Matthew
+Maltboy, and shook hands with him. "Fat and jolly as ever," said he.
+
+From the first adjective Matthew recoiled; though he tried to justify
+the propriety of the second by a laugh.
+
+"And I like you--hang me if I don't!" said Mr. Frump, with California
+bluntness, "_because_ you're fat and jolly. But here's wifey, and I know
+she wants to say somethin' to you."
+
+"So I do," said Mrs. Frump. "My head was so full of business to-day,
+that I had quite forgotten it. But you must step aside with me," she
+added, looking significantly at Miss Trapper.
+
+Matthew stepped aside; and she placed her lips to his ear, and
+whispered, "What do you think of Miss Trapper?"
+
+"A very pretty girl," said Matthew.
+
+"So she is; and one of the best-hearted creatures that ever lived. A
+little singular in one respect, perhaps."
+
+"What is that?"
+
+"Oh! she speaks out her mind--that's all. But then you always know where
+to find her."
+
+"She has not spoken any of it to me, at all events," said Matthew. "I
+can't get her to talk."
+
+"That's because she's modest. Cultivate her, and you'll find her a
+splendid girl. Between you and me, I have recommended you to her, and,
+depend upon it, she will meet you halfway."
+
+"All right," whispered Matthew, gratefully.
+
+Here the full voice of old Van Quintem announced dinner, for which the
+elderly ladies had been demurely waiting for some time. Two by two the
+bridal party and the guests marched to the banquet, spread in the long,
+broad dining room, which was one of the best features of this sturdy,
+old-fashioned house.
+
+What the bill of fare was; what tunes the band played in the library;
+what kind things were said to the bride and bridegroom; what compliments
+were breathed into young female ears, and not rebuked; what vows of love
+were exchanged; what courteous remarks of the old school were made by
+the bachelor Bank President; what ancient jokes were passed off by the
+wits of the party as new; what abominable conundrums were then and there
+honestly invented; what overwhelming confusion Uncle Ith experienced,
+when he found himself seated next to a lady who talked loud at him, and
+how he wished himself at home, one hundred feet from the ground; what
+complete happiness was felt and expressed by everybody, but especially
+by old Van Quintem and Marcus Wilkeson; what improbable stories were
+told by Mr. Frump; what philosophical sayings uttered on the spur of the
+moment by Fayette Overtop; what slightly impertinent but always amiable
+remarks advanced by Wesley Tiffles;--all this might be imagined, with a
+slight mental effort; but not so Matthew Maltboy's new misfortune.
+
+Profiting by Mrs. Frump's friendly suggestion, Matthew had exhausted all
+his resources of conversation in an effort to interest Miss Trapper. She
+had listened, and had returned faultlessly proper replies, and had
+conducted herself so much like all the other young women that Matthew
+had ever met, that he was puzzled to guess in what respect her
+singularity consisted. He longed to see a piece of that mind, which,
+according to Mrs. Frump, she was in the habit of exhibiting to people.
+He was soon gratified.
+
+Miss Trapper had remarked, that, in a few days, she was going to visit
+her friends in Chemung County, and would probably remain there three
+months. It struck Matthew as the right time to make a point.
+
+"Then I shall not see you, Miss Trapper, during all that time!" he said,
+with a sigh.
+
+Miss Trapper levelled a sharp glance at him, and said, "I suppose not."
+
+The remark was tartly made; but Matthew had noticed that she habitually
+spoke quick and short.
+
+"Our acquaintance has thus far been very pleasant, Miss Trapper; at
+least on my side," whispered Matthew. "Must it stop here?"
+
+To which Miss Trapper replied, "I don't know."
+
+Though the observation was not encouraging, it was, on the other hand,
+not entirely forbidding.
+
+"Since we are to be separated for three months, Miss Trapper, might I
+solicit the great privilege of corresponding with you occasionally?"
+
+Miss Trapper's thin lips expelled two words, like shot out of a gun:
+"What for?"
+
+"What for?" echoed the amazed Matthew. "Why--for the pleasure of
+exchanging our ideas, you know."
+
+"That would be a bore," said Miss Trapper.
+
+"I didn't understand you," said Matthew, distrusting his ears.
+
+"I said it would be a bore--a bore!" returned Miss Trapper, with painful
+distinctness. "I hate letter writing."
+
+"Oh! ah! Do you?" said Matthew, feebly. "Perhaps you would like some
+pickled cauliflower, Miss Trapper?"
+
+"Thank you."
+
+Matthew handed the pickled cauliflower to her, and held his tongue,
+satisfied with what he had seen of Miss Trapper's singularity, and not
+at all anxious to receive a larger piece of her mind.
+
+"I am doomed to be a bachelor," thought Matthew, with a suppressed
+groan. But Hope, which attends upon fat and lean men alike, whispered in
+his mind's ear, "Why not marry a woman as fat as yourself?"
+
+"A capital idea!" thought Matthew "and if there's no other way to find
+one, I'll advertise for her."
+
+Dinner was protracted to a length that seemed tedious to all but the
+representatives of the old school. When it did come to an end, the party
+adjourned to the parlors, where a reasonable time was devoted to
+conversation and flirtation. At length the musicians, having taken their
+wedding dinner in their apartment, and drank full bumpers (which,
+somehow, never interfere with the accuracy of musical performances) to
+the health of the happy pair, struck up a quadrille, which was at once
+interpreted by the younger people as a signal for dancing. Two sets were
+instantly formed, and rattled through with. The Lancers followed, and
+was liked so much that the musicians were called upon to repeat it three
+times. The sets had now increased to four, filling the two parlors, and
+crowding the elderly people to the wall or the hallway. Then, luckily,
+old Van Quintem bethought himself of the old-fashioned contra-dance, as
+a contrivance for bringing his contemporaries on their legs. By an
+extraordinary piece of good fortune, the musicians had learned it, and
+played it at a silver wedding the week previous.
+
+As the familiar notes, not heard for years, saluted the ears of the
+bachelor Bank President, he showed the animation of an old war-horse at
+the sound of the trumpet. "Now is our time," said he.
+
+Moved by common impulse, the members of a past generation rose, and took
+their places. Old Van Quintem, temporarily forgetting his rheumatism,
+led off, escorting Mrs. Crull. The bachelor Bank President took charge
+of a widow, in whose breast he had revived feelings that flourished
+twenty years before. The retired merchants brought each other's wives
+upon the floor. Even Uncle Ith came out from his seclusion in a corner,
+where he had been listening to the sound of his own fire bell, rung by
+other hands that night, and felt that here, at least, he should make no
+blunders. The tall, talkative lady, from whom there seemed to be no
+escape, had fastened on him as a partner. The good clergyman was the
+only old or middle-aged gentleman who did not take his place in the set,
+and he looked on and laughed.
+
+The dance commenced, slow at first, then gradually faster. The younger
+people, when they came to understand the simple movement, fell into the
+chain couple after couple, until it extended into the hallway, and
+through it into the parlors again. Everybody was drawn in now, old and
+young, married and unmarried, the minister and his wife only excepted,
+and they marked the measure with their heels. Round and round, and
+faster and faster, went the chain, with its constantly changing links.
+The musicians, playing the same strains over and over again, became
+frenzied by the repetition, and doubled the time without knowing it.
+Legs that had entered slow and stately upon the interminable maze,
+became, without the knowledge or consent of their owners, nimble and
+gymnastics.
+
+It was a delightful peculiarity of this wonderful dance, that couples
+could withdraw without breaking up the figure. The bride and groom,
+acting upon this privilege, slipped out of the flying circle, and
+sought, unaccompanied, the solitude of the vine-covered piazza behind
+the house, there to commune for a moment upon their new-found happiness.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The night was calm. A faint breeze from the south stirred up secret
+odors in the hearts of dew-covered flowers, and musically sighed through
+the leaves and vines. The heavens were dark, but unclouded; and, as the
+lips of the lovers met in one clinging kiss, the host of stars beamed
+down upon them, and proclaimed an ETERNITY OF LOVE.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+FIVE YEARS.
+
+Five years are an eventful space in the history of blocks, as of men.
+Within that period, they may be burnt down, blown down, or torn down to
+make room for grander blocks. In quick-growing American cities, the
+average life of blocks is less than that of the human generation that
+tenants them. First wood, then brick, then brownstone or marble--these
+are the successive forms of block life, before anything like stability
+is reached. Marble is the only real type of the permanent in American
+architecture. Nobody pulls down marble.
+
+But five years had made little change in the exterior of our block. It
+was situated at a point in the city from which the ebb tide of Fashion
+was slowly receding, and which the flood tide of Trade had not yet
+touched. There was not a new house on the block, or an old one
+materially altered. A little paint, and a diligent application of broom
+and Croton water, had kept the block quite fresh and jaunty. On the
+south side there were some slight external modifications, in the shape
+of oblong black signs, fastened near basement doors, and bearing names
+of doctors. Ten of these signs had been added to the south side within
+five years. There were only two houses upon that side, now, to which you
+could come amiss in pursuit of medical advice.
+
+One of these was old Van Quintem's. Five years had passed over the old
+house and the old man lightly (both had been made to last, and were well
+taken care of), and gave to them only a mellower and riper look. The old
+man's long white hair had not commenced falling out; and his cheeks
+still bloomed with a ruddiness that does not belong to second childhood.
+He could still read his dear old books--and carefully chosen new
+ones--without spectacles; though he often preferred to hear them read in
+a soft, sweet tone, by a dear girl whom he always called Pet, and who
+would sit for hours at the old man's feet, giving to the noble thoughts
+of poet, novelist, or philosopher, the added charm of a sympathetic
+voice. At such times, a fine fellow, who was still known as Bog, would
+look on and listen, with rapt attention, and the happiest smile on his
+face. Sometimes these tranquil scenes would be pleasantly broken in
+upon, and the meaning of the author profitably obscured, by the entrance
+of a certain little Helen, whom the old man would kiss, and call
+"Grandpop's sugarp'um," and "Sweety peety." Bog would then catch it up,
+and toss it aloft, all whirling with curls, laces, and blue ribbons, and
+would say, "Cud-je-wod-je now, cud-je-wod-je now, cud-je-wod-je now," at
+each tossing; and the child, with the marvellous instinct of eighteen
+months, would understand this mysterious dialect, and then would smile
+through large blue eyes that looked like its mother's.
+
+To this house, Myndert Van Quintem, jr., had never returned; and no
+authentic intelligence of him had ever come. Fayette Overtop, Esq.,
+while on a professional visit to St. Paul, Minnesota, to settle a large
+land claim, had heard of a notorious Van Benton, who had kept a gambling
+house there several years, and was finally killed by a spendthrift whom
+he had cleaned out of his last cent one night. The best description
+which he could get of this man, tallied precisely with that of Myndert
+Van Quintem, jr. But Overtop, with that discretion which was continually
+enlarging his circle of paying practice, said nothing of this to the old
+gentleman. Among the reports that Overtop had heard of this Van Benton,
+was one, that he had forged his father's signature to large amounts in
+New York city, and had fled to the West, and there changed his name to
+avoid the arrest and punishment which his father had promised him. Had
+the old gentleman been informed of this circumstance, he would at once
+have identified Van Benton as his son; for it was known to him alone,
+that young Myndert had repeatedly forged his name (evidences of which
+had been found in the desk where Marcus Wilkeson had often seen the
+young man busily writing--evidences which the forger had accidentally
+omitted to burn), and that he had been induced to leave the city through
+fear that his father would give him up to justice at last. On the
+memorable night in the milliner's shop in Greenpoint, the young
+profligate had seen that his father was terribly in earnest, and had
+quailed in the presence of that outraged and indignant soul.
+
+The second house not ornamented by a doctor's sign, on the south side of
+the block, was the old tenement building of which Mr. Minford had
+occupied the upper story, five years before. The tenants had all been
+changed two or three times; but the "Minford tragedy" was still a
+current legend among them. Murders, or strange homicides, are fixtures
+of houses where they occur. Nothing obliterates their memory but tearing
+down the houses, and building anew--which is the course of treatment
+that the proprietor was proposing to himself, in consequence of the
+steady depreciation of rents. Pet never passed that house, or dared to
+look at it even from a distance.
+
+Bachelors' Hall, on the north side of the block, was still occupied by
+the three original tenants; and they liked it so well, that they had
+bought it, and owned it on the Tontine plan--viz., that, upon the death
+of one of the owners, his share shall go to the survivors.
+
+Five years had improved Marcus Wilkeson's relish for a good book, an
+after-dinner pipe, and a chat with a friend. It was plain to all his
+friends--even to those who were happiest in their wedded lives--that
+Marcus was a great deal better off single than married. His was the
+genial monkish nature, which thrives best in celibacy.
+
+Every afternoon Marcus visited his white-haired neighbor opposite, and
+never forgot to take along a toy, or some candy, for his grandniece
+Helen. He brought these offerings in lieu of baby talk, which he could
+never master. This fact pointed him out, beyond all question, as a
+predestined old bachelor.
+
+The general supervision of the house was intrusted to Mrs. Overtop; and
+most sensibly did she manage it. Knowing that a bar of cast iron is more
+easily bent than the set habits of men of twenty-five and upward, she
+attempted no changes in the domestic regulations of the establishment.
+The three friends found that they had not only all of their old freedom,
+but a charming female voice to accompany them in their songs, and on the
+piano or guitar, and a capital fourth hand at whist, and a beautiful
+reader, and an ever-cheerful companion. "If I could find such a wife,
+now!" Marcus and Maltboy would say. "But you can't," Overtop would
+answer. "There's not another like her in this world." There was a
+little Fayette Overtop, jr., two years old, a great pet of the
+bachelors, and the far-off husband of little Helen, on the other side of
+the block.
+
+Matthew Maltboy weighed two hundred and twenty pounds. As associate
+counsel of Overtop, he made an imposing show in court, which was not
+fully borne out by his legal attainments. He was always talking of
+matrimonial intentions--a sure sign that a man never will be married.
+His last rebuff from Miss Trapper (now the wife of a wealthy tanner and
+currier) had taught him to keep his flirtations within narrower limits;
+but he openly professed, and probably believed, that, when he really
+wanted to marry--without joking, you know--he could take his pick from
+the wide and varied ranges of female society. He smoked incessantly like
+a martyr, to reduce his flesh, but no adipose matter ever vanished in
+that cloud of sacrifice!
+
+Mash, the cook, bestowed her honest hand and maiden heart upon Patching,
+the artist, who had first seen her at the station house, and there
+contracted an artistic admiration of her face and figure. She would have
+preferred a pirate; but Patching's enormous hat gave him a freebooterish
+appearance, which went far to reconcile her to him. She was really a
+pretty woman--much handsomer than some of the shadowy beauties Patching
+was wont to put on canvas--and she made him a good and faithful
+wife--and cooked better dinners for him, at a small expense, than he had
+ever eaten before--and sent him out into the world clean and tidy every
+morning. Patching affected to be ashamed of his wife, and snubbed her
+sometimes in the presence of other people. But everybody who knew the
+couple, saw that he had the best of the bargain. Mrs. Patching still
+took her favorite weekly, and cried over the stories as copiously
+as ever.
+
+Mrs. Crull continued to be the dearest and best friend of Pet and Mrs.
+Overtop; and little Helen and little Fayette would never know the great
+debt of gratitude that they owed to that excellent lady. Whenever she
+called on Mrs. Overtop, she always began to be extremely circumspect in
+her pronunciation and grammar, from force of habit; but soon relapsed
+into those old errors which, happily, were of the head, and not of the
+heart. Mrs. Crull made no mistakes in her affections. She was in
+mourning for Mr. Crull, and truly vowed that she would never
+marry again.
+
+Mrs. Slapman had ceased to live on the block. Mr. Slapman had basely
+defeated the beneficent decree of the law, by turning his property into
+ready cash, and sailing for Europe. This deprived Mrs. S. of her alimony
+the second year after their separation, and compelled her to give up
+housekeeping, and the pursuit of TRUTH, in New York. She is now living
+among a small colony of Jigbees, in an obscure village of Connecticut,
+the pride of her family, the envy of the neighbors, and the idol of two
+local poets and of the professor of a High School in an adjoining town,
+who has learned her history, and is now patiently waiting for Slapman to
+die before offering her his hand in marriage.
+
+Uncle Ith rang the great bell in the high tower for a number of years,
+with perfect satisfaction to himself and to the firemen. He took a
+paper, and he read it, and he found its political arguments so powerful,
+and so interesting, that he adopted them as his own--as many another man
+of greater pretensions has done--and he got into the bad habit of
+talking politics in a small way. It happened, not long after, that there
+was an election for mayor; and a mayor was chosen who held to a variety
+of politics quite the opposite of that which was so ably inculcated in
+Uncle Ith's favorite journal. About a month later, Uncle Ith turned to
+the political column of his paper, and there read that he had been
+turned out of office, and that one Schimmerfliming--a German politician
+of the ----th Ward, who had been of great service in compassing the
+election of the new mayor--had been appointed in his place. The fact
+was, that Uncle Ith was highly acceptable to all parties as a no-party
+man. But, when he turned politician, he made himself amenable to the
+harsh laws of political warfare, and became (as his paper phrased it)
+"the hoary-headed victim of the unprincipled tyrant who, with the
+cunning of the serpent and the vindictive ferocity of the hyena, weaves
+his spider's web of mischief in his dark corner of the City Hall." Uncle
+Ith retired to private life with a snug property, patiently saved up and
+thoughtfully invested. But, as Adam went on eating apples,
+notwithstanding the disaster which had come to him from that species of
+fruit, so Uncle Ith took his newspaper, and paid for it punctually, and
+devoured it daily to the last.
+
+While Uncle Ith fell by politics, Coroner Bullfast rose by it. A
+judicious distribution of money and liquors, a notoriety for street
+fights, a singular talent for profanity, and an unstinted adulation of
+the basest classes of the community, won for him, in succession, some of
+the best prizes of the Municipal lottery. He has his small, sunken eyes
+now fixed on one of the highest offices of the State; and it will take a
+strong combination to defeat a candidate backed by such powerful
+agencies and interests.
+
+Mr. and Mrs. Frump lived happily on their country property. Mr. Frump
+tried experiments in blackberry raising, which proved a success, and
+was, at last accounts, concentrating his talents on the development of a
+new strawberry seedling. Whenever he went to town, he made a point of
+carrying back Matthew Maltboy, for whom his regard was inexplicably
+strong; and nothing gave him greater pleasure than to see his wife,
+gracefully mounted on the spirited filly, and Matthew, heavily astride
+of the sober gray, starting off for a morning's ride, while he stayed at
+home to push on the seedling.
+
+When Wesley Tiffles had spent ten thousand dollars in elegant leisure,
+he arrived at the noble determination to "salt down," as he called it,
+the remaining ten thousand dollars, in ten different savings banks. He
+distributed it thus, in order that the failure of one of the banks might
+not ruin him. The interest of this money, drawn half-yearly, furnished
+him with a basis for operations of a character requiring genius, pens,
+ink, and paper, rather than ready cash. Whenever Tiffles's resources ran
+short, as they did occasionally, he always borrowed, and paid on the
+next interest day. In this policy he was inflexible; and he flattered
+himself on the sternness of his self-denial.
+
+Among the schemes which failed to receive the cordial approbation of
+capitalists, were the following: "A process for extracting green paint
+from green leaves;" ditto for "making nutritious food from the direct
+combination of earth, air, and water;" a plan (submitted to the
+unappreciating Government of Naples) to "extinguish the volcano of
+Vesuvius, by pumping water from the Bay into the crater, in
+consideration of the sum of one million florins, and a monopoly of
+working the extinct volcano for lava."
+
+Wesley Tiffles, profiting, at a late day, by the lesson of the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener," finally invented and patented a striking
+improvement in an apple-paring machine, and, at last accounts, was
+clenching a good bargain for the sale of his invention.
+
+
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+<h1>The Project Gutenberg eBook, Round the Block, by John Bell Bouton</h1>
+<pre>
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at <a href = "https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a></pre>
+<p>Title: Round the Block</p>
+<p>Author: John Bell Bouton</p>
+<p>Release Date: May 3, 2004  [eBook #12243]</p>
+<p>Language: English</p>
+<p>Character set encoding: iso-8859-1</p>
+<p>***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ROUND THE BLOCK***</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<center><h3>E-text prepared by Curtis Weyant, Charlie Kirschner,<br>
+            and the Project Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team</h3></center>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr class="full" size="5" noshade>
+<br>
+<br>
+<p class="ctr"><img src="images/001.png" width="100%" alt=""><br>
+<b>MRS. SLAPMAN AT HOME.</b></p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h1>ROUND THE BLOCK.</h1>
+<h2>An American Novel.</h2>
+<br>
+<h4>By</h4>
+<h2>John Bell Bouton</h2>
+<h4><i>WITH ILLUSTRATIONS</i>.</h4>
+<br>
+<h5>1864.</h5>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2>CONTENTS.</h2>
+<hr style="width: 25%;">
+<blockquote><a href="#BOOK_FIRST.">BOOK FIRST.</a><br>
+<br>
+NEW YEAR'S DAY.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#A_CHAPTER_I.">I. THE BLOCK.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#A_CHAPTER_III.">II. THREE BACHELORS.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#A_CHAPTER_III.">III. PEEPS.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#A_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. QUIGG.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#A_CHAPTER_V.">V. PLEASURE AS BUSINESS.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#B_CHAPTER_VI.">VI. SOMETHING HIDDEN.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#A_CHAPTER_VII.">VII. THE BOY BOG.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#A_CHAPTER_VIII.">VIII. MALTBOY'S TWENTIETH
+AFFAIR.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#A_CHAPTER_IX.">IX. MRS. SLAPMAN AT HOME.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#A_CHAPTER_X.">X. INFIRMITIES OF GENIUS.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_SECOND.">BOOK SECOND.</a><br>
+<br>
+POLISHING.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#B_CHAPTER_I.">I. THE ENIGMA.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#B_CHAPTER_II.">II. A DELICATE PROPOSITION.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#B_CHAPTER_III.">III. AN AUXILIARY OF MODERN
+CIVILIZATION.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#B_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. MISS PILLBODY.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#B_CHAPTER_V.">V. A FRIEND IN NEED.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#B_CHAPTER_VI.">VI. BRANCHING OUT.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#B_CHAPTER_VII.">VII. THE LITTLE PUPIL.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_THIRD.">BOOK THIRD.</a><br>
+<br>
+TRAIL OF THE SERPENT.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#C_CHAPTER_I.">I. "ONE--TWO--THREE--FOUR."</a></li>
+<li><a href="#C_CHAPTER_II.">II. THE FALLING BOARD.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#C_CHAPTER_III.">III. SNEAKING JUSTIFIED.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#C_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. UP IN THE AIR.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#C_CHAPTER_V.">V. TONGUES OF FIRE.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_FOURTH.">BOOK FOURTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+CHILDREN OF THE WORLD.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#D_CHAPTER_I.">I. MENDERT VAN QUINTEM AND
+SON.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#D_CHAPTER_II.">II. BUYING GOOD BEHAVIOR.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#D_CHAPTER_III.">III. THE YOUNG MONSTER.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#D_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. WESLEY TIFFLES.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#D_CHAPTER_V.">V. THE PANORAMA OF AFRICA.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_FIFTH.">BOOK FIFTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+MANOEUVRES.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#E_CHAPTER_I.">I. STOLEN--MORE THAN A PURSE.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#E_CHAPTER_II.">II. CONSOLATIONS OF HIGH ART.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#E_CHAPTER_III.">III. LOVING AFAR OFF.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#E_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. LEGERDEMAIN.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_SIXTH.">BOOK SIXTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+MYSTERIES OF THE NIGHT.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#F_CHAPTER_I.">I. THE UNKNOWN HAND.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#F_CHAPTER_II.">II. IN VAIN--IN VAIN.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#F_CHAPTER_III.">III. THE CLASHING ORBS.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#F_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. A VISION OP HORRORS.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#F_CHAPTER_V.">V. WHAT THE MORNING BROUGHT.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_SEVENTH.">BOOK SEVENTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+JOURNEYINGS AGAINST FATE.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#G_CHAPTER_I.">I. PEA-SHOOTING AS A SCIENCE.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#G_CHAPTER_II.">II. BY STEAM.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#G_CHAPTER_III.">III. PIGWORTH, J.P.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#G_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. STOOP.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#G_CHAPTER_V.">V. AN AUDIENCE ANALYZED.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#G_CHAPTER_VI.">VI. HUMORS OF THE
+MANY-HEADED.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#G_CHAPTER_VII.">VII. SCENES NOT IN THE
+BILLS.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_EIGHTH.">BOOK EIGHTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+A DRAMATIC INTERLUDE.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#H_CHAPTER_I.">I. THE OVERTURE.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#H_CHAPTER_II.">II. CURTAIN UP.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#H_CHAPTER_III.">III. ACT SECOND.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#H_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. HOW THE PLAY ENDED.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_NINTH.">BOOK NINTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+THE INQUEST.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#I_CHAPTER_I.">I. CORONER AND JURY.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#I_CHAPTER_II.">II. STATEMENT OF THE
+PRISONER.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#I_CHAPTER_III.">III. JUSTICE GOES TO DINNER.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#I_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. LIGHT IN THE PRISON.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#I_CHAPTER_V.">V. THE SORROW OF WHITE HAIRS.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#I_CHAPTER_VI.">VI. WHAT PAPER, TYPES, AND INK CAN
+DO.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#I_CHAPTER_VII.">VII. PET AS A WITNESS.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#I_CHAPTER_VIII.">VIII. THE BENEFICENCE OF FIRE
+BELLS.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#I_CHAPTER_IX.">IX. AN OLD MAN'S OFFERING.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_TENTH.">BOOK TENTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+DONE ON BOTH SIDES.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#J_CHAPTER_I.">I. A FISHER OF MEN.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#J_CHAPTER_II.">II. PLAYING WITH THE LINE.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#J_CHAPTER_III.">III. PULLING IN.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#J_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. THE FIRST OF MAY.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#J_CHAPTER_V.">V. DEMOLITION OF CERTAIN AIR
+CASTLES.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#J_CHAPTER_VI.">VI. MR. WHEDELL'S CREDITORS IN
+CONVENTION ASSEMBLED.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#J_CHAPTER_VII.">VII. DEUS EX MACHINA.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_ELEVENTH.">BOOK ELEVENTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+DISCOVERIES.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#K_CHAPTER_I.">I. THE OLD HOUSE REVISITED.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#K_CHAPTER_II.">II. A POSTHUMOUS SECRET.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#K_CHAPTER_III.">III. OVERTOP FINDS A SENSIBLE
+WOMAN.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#K_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. INNOCENCE ON A SLIPPERY
+ROAD.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#K_CHAPTER_V.">V. BOG'S OPEN SESAME.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#K_CHAPTER_VI.">VI. TRACKED.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#K_CHAPTER_VII.">VII. FOUND AND LOST.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_TWELFTH.">BOOK TWELFTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+SPECULATIONS--PECUNIARY AND MATRIMONIAL.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#L_CHAPTER_I.">I. THE "COSMOPOLITAN WINDOW
+FASTENER."</a></li>
+<li><a href="#L_CHAPTER_II.">II. MIDDLE-AGED CUPID.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#L_CHAPTER_III.">III. SLAPMAN <i>vs</i>.
+SLAPMAN.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#L_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. HOW OVERTOP SEALED A CONTRACT IN A
+WAY UNKNOWN TO CHITTY.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#L_CHAPTER_V.">V. A RETURNED CALIFORNIAN.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#L_CHAPTER_VI.">VI. REVELATIONS OF A LAUGH.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_THIRTEENTH.">BOOK THIRTEENTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+THE STRANGE LADY.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#M_CHAPTER_I.">I. A STORY OP THE PAST.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#M_CHAPTER_II.">II. POSSIBLE LOVE.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#M_CHAPTER_III.">III. UNCLE AND NIECE.</a></li>
+</ul>
+<br>
+<a href="#BOOK_FOURTEENTH.">BOOK FOURTEENTH.</a><br>
+<br>
+HAPPY DAYS.<br>
+<br>
+<ul>
+<li><a href="#N_CHAPTER_I.">I. OWNERS OF THE BEAUTIFUL.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#N_CHAPTER_II.">II. THE LAST OF A MYSTERY.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#N_CHAPTER_III.">III. LOVE CROWNED.</a></li>
+<li><a href="#N_CHAPTER_IV.">IV. FIVE YEARS.</a></li>
+</ul>
+</blockquote>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_FIRST."></a>BOOK FIRST.</h2>
+<h3>NEW YEAR'S DAY</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="A_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>THE BLOCK.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>On the east side of the block were four brownstone houses, wide,
+tall, and roomy. Seen from the street, they had the appearance of
+not being inhabited. In the upper stories, all the curtains or
+blinds were closely drawn. In the lower story, the heavy lace that
+hung in carefully careless folds on each side of the window, seemed
+never to have been disturbed since it left the upholsterer's hands.
+Whatever life and motion there might have been in the basement,
+were sheltered from observation by conical firs or square-clipped
+box borders, set out on strictly geometrical principles in each of
+the four front yards. The doors were ponderous and tight fitting,
+as if they were never meant to be opened; and the vivid polish of
+their surfaces showed no trace of human handling. No marks of feet
+could be detected on the smooth, heavy flagstones which led up from
+the sidewalk, or on the great steps flanked by massive balustrades.
+The four mansions, in their new, lofty, and apparently tenantless
+state, looked, like the occasional residences of people for some
+purpose of ceremony, rather than the dear homes of the small,
+loving, domestic circles that really lived there.</p>
+<p>Such was the outer view of the east side of the block, and it is
+the only view that the reader of this book will get; for it is the
+author's intention profoundly to respect the select seclusion of
+the occupants.</p>
+<p>Now, the west side of the block was in all respects, exactly
+opposite to the east side. The houses were built of bricks, dingy
+with the whirling dust of twenty years. Two of the three stories
+swarmed with women and children, always visible at all seasons; and
+the lower story was devoted to some kind of cheap trade. Wholesale
+business is gregarious in its ways; but it is the habit of retail
+business to scatter, so as to present, in the same neighborhood, no
+two people in exactly the same line. Thus it happened that, on the
+west side of the block, there was only one drygoods dealer, whose
+shop front and awning posts were festooned with calicoes and other
+fabrics, ticketed with ingeniously deformed figures, and bearing
+some attractive adjective, expressing the owners private and
+conscientious opinion of their excellence. There was one
+boot-maker, who strung up his products in long branches, like
+onions; and, although his business was not at all flourishing,
+solaced himself with the reflection that he had a monopoly of it on
+the block. There was one apothecary, between whose flashing red and
+yellow lights and those of his nearest rival there was a desirable
+distance. A solitary coffinmaker, a butcher, a baker, a newspaper
+vender, a barber, a confectioner, a hardware merchant, a hatter,
+and a tailor, each encroaching rather extensively on the sidewalk
+with the emblems of his trade, rejoiced in their exemption from a
+ruinous competition. The only people on the block whose interests
+appeared to clash, were the grocers, who flanked either corner, and
+made a large and delusive show of boxes, barrels, and tea chests;
+and it was strongly suspected that they were identical in
+interests, under different names, and maintained a secret league to
+catch all the custom of the vicinity.</p>
+<p>The south side was a gradation of buildings, from the two-story
+brick grocery on the west corner to the grandest of the stone
+mansions on the east. With the exception of two or three houses
+built in the early history of the block, and occupied by obstinate
+old proprietors, it presented such a regularly ascending line of
+roofs, that a giant could have walked up stairs from one end to the
+other. Although each house was built upon a plan peculiar to
+itself, and supposed to reflect the long-cherished views of the
+original owner, there were certain resemblances among them. This
+was sometimes the effect of a jealous rivalry; sometimes of
+imitation. In one dozen houses there was a costly struggle for
+supremacy in window curtains. In another dozen, the harmless
+contest pertained to Grecian urns crowned with flowers, or dry
+dolphins, tritons, or naiads, rising from the bosoms of little
+gravel beds in miniature front yards. In a third dozen, there was a
+perspective of broad iron balconies elegantly constructed for show,
+and sometimes put to hazardous use, on warm summer nights, by
+venturesome gentlemen with cigars, or ladies with fans.</p>
+<p>About the middle of the block was a colony of doctors, who had
+increased, in five years, from two to ten. Their march was
+eastward, and it could be calculated to a nicety how long it would
+be before the small black, gilt-lettered signs of their profession
+would press hard upon the great house at the corner. Why they thus
+congregated together, unless with the friendly purpose of relieving
+each other's patients in each other's absence, and so saving
+humanity from sudden suffering and death, was a mystery to
+everybody but themselves.</p>
+<p>The north side lacked variety. One part of it, comprising twenty
+lots, had been built up on speculation by an enterprising
+landowner. The houses were precisely alike, from coal cellar to
+chimney top, with front railings of exactly the same pattern,
+crowned with iron pineapples from the same mould, encompassing
+little plots of ground laid out in walks similar to the fraction of
+a hair; the sole ornaments of which were four little spruce trees,
+planted at equal distances apart.</p>
+<p>This row of houses was very distracting even to the occupants,
+with whom it was a feat of arithmetic to identify their homes in
+the daytime, and much more so at night, when the landmarks were
+shadowy and indistinguishable. Occasionally, well-meaning tenants
+found themselves pulling at wrong doorbells; and there was one man
+who got tipsy every Saturday night, and rang himself quite through
+the row before he tumbled in on his own hall carpet. It was in
+counting the spruce trees, he said, which had a perplexing way of
+doubling, that he invariably lost the track.</p>
+<p>In nearly every house on this block there was a piano. The piano
+was the great equalizer of the block. And, though in the loftier
+houses the pianos might have been larger and costlier, and
+unquestionably noisier, it did not follow that they were better
+played or pleasanter to hear than the humbler instruments which
+served to swell the tumultuous chorus in hours of morning practice.
+With regard to these pianos, it may here be observed, that a
+gentleman with a passion for statistics, who chanced to be well
+acquainted through the block, made the remarkable discovery that
+the players were usually unmarried ladies; and that, when they
+acquired husbands (as they occasionally did on that block), they
+put aside the piano as something quite incapable of contributing to
+their new-found happiness.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="A_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>THREE BACHELOKS.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Near the centre of the north side of the block stood a house in
+which three men, who have much to do in this story, were whiling
+away an hour before dinner, at the edge of evening, in the month of
+December, 185-. The house had strange stones let in over the
+windows and door, and was broad and sturdy, and was entered by
+steps slightly worn, and was shaded by a tall and old chestnut
+tree, and showed many signs of age. It was because of these
+evidences of antiquity, although the house was in good preservation
+and vastly comfortable, that it had been picked out and rented by
+the three men, two weeks previously.</p>
+<p>Yet the three men exhibited no marks of age, past or coming,
+upon them. The oldest, Mr. Marcus Wilkeson, looked no more than
+thirty-two; but frankly owned to thirty-six. Being six feet and two
+inches high, having a slim figure, round face, smooth brow, gentle
+eyes, perfect teeth to the utmost extent of his laugh, and a head
+of hair free from the plague-spot of incipient baldness which
+haunts the young men of this generation, his appearance, now that
+he was confessedly a man, was very much like that of an overgrown
+boy. On the contrary, when he was really a boy, his extraordinary
+height (six feet at sixteen years) had given him the outward
+semblance of a premature man. Probably his long legs and arms,
+which were exceedingly supple, and were always swinging about with
+a certain juvenile awkwardness, contributed much to the
+youthfulness of his appearance.</p>
+<p>At the time of his introduction here, his legs were as quiet as
+in their nature they could be, having been elevated, for the
+greater comfort of the owner, to the top of a pianoforte, and
+presenting an inclination of forty-five degrees to Mr. Wilkeson's
+body, reposing calmly and smoking an antique pipe in his favorite
+chair below. One of his long arms was hanging listlessly by his
+side, and the other made a sharp projecting elbow, and terminated
+in the interior of his vest. This was the attitude which, of all
+possible adjustments of the human anatomy, Mr. Wilkeson preferred;
+and he always assumed it and his pipe the moment he had put on his
+dressing gown and Turkey slippers. He was well aware that popular
+treatises on the "Art of Behavior" and the "Code of Politeness"
+were extremely hard upon this disposition of the legs. His
+half-sister, Philomela Wilkeson, who was high authority, had often
+visited his legs with the severest censure, when, upon suddenly
+entering the room where he was seated, she found the offending
+members confronting her from the top of the piano, or the table, or
+a chair, or sometimes from the mantelpiece. While Marcus Wilkeson
+admitted the full force of her strictures as applied to legs in
+general, he claimed an exception for his legs, which were always in
+his own or other people's way when they rested on the floor, or
+were crossed after the many fashions popular with the short-legged
+part of mankind.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson's heretical opinion concerning legs was part of
+a system of independent views which he entertained of life
+generally. He had given up a profitable broker's shop in Wall
+street, a year before, because he had made a fortune ten times
+larger than he would ever spend. Having fulfilled the object for
+which he started in business, and for which he had toiled like a
+slave ten years, he conceived that nothing could be more sensible
+than to retire from it, make room for other deserving men, and
+enjoy his ample earnings in the ways which pleased him most, before
+an old age of money getting had deadened his five senses, his
+intellect, and his heart.</p>
+<p>Persons who knew Marcus Wilkeson well were aware that he was a
+shy, self-distrustful fellow, amiable, generous, and that the only
+faults which could possibly be alleged against him were an
+excessive fondness for old books, old cigars, and profitless
+meditations, and a catlike affection for quiet corners. And when
+his half-sister Philomela--who had no hypocritical concealment
+about her, thank heaven! and always told people what she thought of
+them--pronounced the first of those luxuries "trash," the second
+"disgusting," and the other two "idiotic," he met her candid
+criticisms with a pleasant laugh, and said that, at any rate, they
+hurt nobody but himself.</p>
+<p>To which Philomela invariably retorted: "But suppose every
+strapping fellow, at your time of life, should take to
+novel-reading, and such fooleries, what would become of the world,
+I would like to know?"</p>
+<p>And her brother, puffing out a long stream of smoke, would
+respond: "Suppose, my dear sister, every woman was destined to be
+an old maid, as you are, what would become of the world, <i>I</i>
+would like to know?"</p>
+<p>The conversation always terminated at this point, by Philomela
+declaring that coarse personality was the refuge of weak-minded
+people when they could not answer arguments, and that, for her
+part, she would never take the trouble to say another plain,
+straightforward word for his good; whereupon there would be a
+truce, lasting sometimes a whole day.</p>
+<p>Fayette Overtop, the second of the three young men--the one
+looking out of the window, drumming idly on the glass, and
+continually tossing back his head to clear the long black hair from
+his brow, over which it hung in an incurable cowlick--was a short,
+compact, nervous person, twenty-five years old. Mr. Overtop had
+been educated for the law, but, finding the profession
+uncomfortably crowded when he came into it, had not yet achieved
+those brilliant triumphs which he once fondly imagined within his
+reach. For three years he had been in regular attendance at his
+office from nine A.M. to three P.M. (as per written card on the
+door), except in term time, when he was a patient frequenter of the
+courts. During these three years he had picked up something less
+than enough to pay his half of the rent of two small, dimly
+lighted, but expensive rooms on the fourth floor of a labyrinth in
+the lower part of the city.</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop, when asked to explain this state of things, about
+which he made no concealment, always attributed it to a "lack of
+clients."</p>
+<p>If he had clients enough, and of the right kind, he felt
+confident that he could make a figure in the profession. Having few
+clients, and those in insignificant cases only, of course he had no
+opportunities for distinction. He could not stand in the street and
+beg for clients, or drag men forcibly into his chambers and compel
+them to be clients; and he would not degrade the dignity of his
+calling by advertising for clients, or taking any means whatever to
+get them, except by establishing a reputation for professional
+learning and integrity. The only inducement which he ever put in
+the way of clients, was a series of signs, outside the street door,
+on the first flight of stairs, at the head of the first landing, on
+the second flight of stairs, at the head of the second landing, and
+so on to the fourth floor, where the firm name of "Overtop &amp;
+Maltboy" confronted the panting climber for the eighth and last
+time, painted in large gold letters on black tin, nailed to the
+office door.</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop was willing to give clients every facility for
+finding him, when they had once started at the bottom of the
+building; and would, as it were, lead them gently on, by successive
+signs; but good luck and a good name, slowly but surely acquired,
+must do the rest.</p>
+<p>A snug property, of which Mr. Overtop spent less than the
+income, fortunately enabled him to indulge in these novel views,
+and to regard clients, much as they were desired, as by no means
+indispensable to his existence. In his unprofessional hours, Mr.
+Overtop was everything but a lawyer. He was chiefly a philosopher,
+a discoverer, a searcher after truth, a turner-up of undeveloped
+beauties in every-day things, which, he said, were rich in
+instruction when intelligently examined. He could trace out lines
+of beauty in a gridiron, and detect the subtle charm that lurks in
+the bootjack.</p>
+<p>As not unfrequently happens, in partnerships of business and of
+other descriptions, Matthew Maltboy--the young man standing before
+the blazing coal fire, and critically surveying his own person--was
+quite the opposite of Fayette Overtop. Maltboy was fat and calm.
+Portraits were in existence showing Maltboy as a young lad in a
+jacket and turn-down collar, having a slim, graceful figure, a
+delicate face, and a sad but interesting promise of early decay
+upon him. Other portraits, of the same original, taken at later
+periods of the photographic art, represented a gradual squaring out
+of the shoulders, a progressive puffiness in the cheeks, lips, and
+hands, incipient folds in the chin, and a prevalent swollen
+appearance over all of Matthew Maltboy that the artist permitted
+the sun to copy.</p>
+<p>Portraits of Maltboy for a series of years would have proved a
+valuable contribution to human knowledge, as showing the steady and
+remarkable changes through which a man who is doomed to be fat
+passes onward to his destiny. But Maltboy stopped sitting for
+portraits when he reached the age of twenty, deciding, as many
+another public character has done, to transmit only the earlier and
+more ethereal representations of himself to posterity.</p>
+<p>By some compensating law of Nature, there were given to Maltboy
+a light and cheerful heart, a tendency to laugh on the smallest
+provocation, and a nice susceptibility to the beautiful. Not the
+beautiful in rivers, forests, skies, and other inanimate things,
+but the beautiful in woman. And as Overtop was gifted to discover
+charms in material objects which were plain in other eyes, so
+Maltboy possessed the wonderful faculty of seeing beauty in female
+faces, where other people saw, perhaps, only a bad nose, dull eyes,
+and a pinched-up mouth. This mental endowment might have been a
+priceless gift to a portrait painter, who was desirous of
+gratifying his sitters; but it was for Matthew Maltboy a fatal
+possession. It had led him to love too many women too much at first
+sight, and to shift his admiration from one dear object to another
+with a suddenness and rapidity destructive to a well-ordered state
+of society.</p>
+<p>Though these multiplied transfers of affection occasionally
+caused some disappointment among the victims of Mr. Maltboy's
+inconstancy, it was wisely ordained that he should be the principal
+sufferer--that every new passion should involve him in new
+difficulties, and subject him to a degree of mental distress which
+would have reduced the flesh of any man not hopelessly predisposed
+to fatness. As Mr. Matthew Maltboy stood by the fire, he was not
+taking the profitable retrospective view of his life which he
+should have taken, but was glancing with an expression of concern
+at the circumference of a showy vest pattern which cut off the view
+of his legs.</p>
+<p>The apartment in which the three bachelors were keeping a
+meditative silence, was large, square, high, on the first floor
+back, commanding an ample prospect of neglected rear yards, and all
+the strange things that are usually huddled into those strictly
+private domains. The furniture of the room was rich and
+substantial, but not too good to be used. The chairs were none of
+those frail, slippery structures of horsehair and mahogany so
+inhospitably cold to the touch; but they were oak, high backed,
+deep, long armed, softly but stoutly cushioned with leather, and
+yawned to receive nodding tenants and send them comfortably to
+sleep amid the fragrant clouds of the after-dinner pipe or
+cigar.</p>
+<p>At one end of the room was Marcus Wilkeson's library, consisting
+of about five hundred volumes, of poems, novels, travels by land
+and sea, histories, and biographies, which the owner dogmatically
+held to be all the books in the world worth reading. The admission
+of a new book to this select company of standard worthies, Mr.
+Wilkeson was vain enough to regard as a high compliment to the
+author, and as a final settlement of any disputes which might have
+been abroad as to its merits.</p>
+<p>On another side of the room was a grand piano, open, and covered
+with the latest music, and sometimes played on in a surprisingly
+graceful manner by the fat fingers of Matthew Maltboy. On the walls
+hung some pictures, that were not unpleasant to look at. There were
+two portraits of danseuses, with little gauzy wings, and wands
+tipped with magic stars; one large, full-faced likeness of a pet
+actress, taken in just the right attitude to show the rounding
+shoulders, the lightly poised head, and the heavy hair, to the best
+advantage; some charming French prints, among them "Niobe and her
+Daughters" and "Di Vernon;" and a half dozen pictures of the fine
+old English stage-coach days. Over the fireplace were suspended
+several pairs of boxing gloves, garnishing the picture of a tall
+fellow in fighting attitude, whose prodigious muscles were only a
+little smaller than those of all the saints and angels of all the
+accredited masterpieces of ancient art. A pair of foils and masks,
+neatly arranged over each corner of the mantelpiece, completed the
+decorations of the room.</p>
+<p>The three bachelors had gone into housekeeping by way of
+experiment, as a relief from the tedium and oppression of hotels
+and boarding houses, and as an escape from female society, which
+was beginning to pall even upon the huge appetite of Matthew
+Maltboy.</p>
+<p>But two weeks of this self-imposed exile--with no female society
+but Miss Philomela Wilkeson, and Mash, the cook--proved rather too
+much for Matthew's fortitude. He yawned audibly.</p>
+<p>"I understand you," said Marcus; "you are sick of this."</p>
+<p>"Well--hum--it's a little prosy at times." Maltboy yawned
+again.</p>
+<p>"Incorrigible monster!" cried Marcus. "What shall we do with
+him, Top?"</p>
+<p>The person addressed swung back the rebellious cowlick from his
+forehead, as if to clear his thinking faculties from a load while
+he considered the grave question. "Do with him? Do with him? Oh!
+I'll tell you." Here the speaker's eyes flashed with the light of a
+great discovery. "Tether him like a horse, with a certain limited
+area to feed in. D'ye see? D'ye see?"</p>
+<p>"A horse? Can't say that I do," returned Mr. Marcus
+Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>"And I can't say that <i>I</i> do, either," added Mr. Matthew
+Maltboy. "A horse! Why not say a donkey? I should see it quite as
+well."</p>
+<p>"As you please," resumed the impetuous Overtop. "A donkey, then.
+Perhaps the metaphor will be better. What I mean--what you two are
+so dull as not to see--is to put this unreliable Maltboy on a
+moderate allowance of flirtation; to keep him, for example, within
+the limits of this block. D'ye see? D'ye catch the idea?"</p>
+<p>"It begins to dawn on me," said Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>"And I catch a ray or two of it," added Maltboy. But--"</p>
+<p>"Excuse me," interrupted Overtop, stepping between his two
+companions, and gesticulating wildly at each of them in turn, as if
+he would dart conviction into them like electricity from the tips
+of his fingers. "Here is a block full of people. Their houses are
+joined together, or nearly so, all the way round. The inhabitants
+hear each other's pianos playing and each other's babies squalling
+all day long. If a fire breaks out in the block, it may be all
+burned down together. If the measles makes its appearance on the
+block, it probably runs through it. Is there not, therefore, a
+community of dangers among us; and if of dangers, why not of
+pleasures? Why should not the inhabitants of a block be regarded as
+a distinct settlement, or tribe, whose members owe kindness and
+goodwill to each other before the rest of the world? Looking at it
+in the light of humanity, is it not our duty to know our
+neighbors?"</p>
+<p>"And Matt would say, To love them too--that is, the young and
+pretty ones," observed "Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>"Precisely," said Maltboy.</p>
+<p>"Excuse me," continued Overtop, deprecating further interruption
+with both hands. "That is the point I was just coming to. Since
+Maltboy <i>must</i> have female society, and cannot be kept out of
+it by main force, why not give him the range of this block? Catch
+the idea, eh?--in its full force and bearings?"</p>
+<p>"Wilkeson and Maltboy implied, by nods, that they caught it.</p>
+<p>"And--ahem--I think I'll take the same range too," added
+Overtop. "Not because I care a pin about female society, but just
+to test my new theory."</p>
+<p>Cries of "Oh! oh!" from Marcus Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>Overtop laughed. "You'll be a convert to it yet, my good
+fellow."</p>
+<p>"Never," said Marcus, inflexibly, "so long as books and tobacco
+hold out."</p>
+<p>"We'll see," replied Overtop. "But let me think how we are to
+begin." He rubbed his nose with a forefinger, then tossed back the
+cowlick, and said, impetuously: "I have it--I have it! We know
+Quigg, the grocer, at the corner below, for we are customers of
+his. Of course, he has an immense number of customers on the block,
+and will make New Year's calls on all of them, in the way of
+business. Why can't he take us in tow? It's as plain as
+daylight."</p>
+<p>"Plain enough, I admit," said Marcus Wilkeson; "but what will
+Quigg's customers say?"</p>
+<p>"Poor fellow!" returned Overtop. "How feebly you hermits reason
+about society! If you had knocked round town on New Year's days, as
+Matt and I have often done, you would know that visitors are valued
+only because they swell the number of calls, and that it is
+entirely immaterial who they are, or who introduces them. The
+militia general, the banker, the judge, the D.D., the butcher, the
+drygoods clerk, are units of equal value on that day, each adding
+one more to the score which is privately kept behind the door. We
+shall be welcome; never fear for that. You must come with us, and
+see for yourself."</p>
+<p>"I thank you," said Marcus Wilkeson, laughing. "No such
+fooleries at my time of life."</p>
+<p>"Very well," said Overtop. "Matt and I will try to represent the
+new firm of bachelor housekeepers creditably. Matt will look after
+the pretty girls, and I after the sensible ones--that is, if there
+happen to be any on this block."</p>
+<p>"Agreed," observed Matthew Maltboy, catching a view of himself
+in a glass over the fireplace, and not wholly displeased with his
+appearance.</p>
+<p>"Another thought strikes me," said Overtop, explosively. "It's
+nearly half an hour to sunset. I am impatient to begin my
+acquaintance with our fellow citizens--our future friends, if I may
+so call them. Let us look out of the windows, and see what the
+excellent people are doing. Perhaps it may interest even a recluse
+and bookworm like you."</p>
+<p>"Nonsense," rejoined Marcus Wilkeson. "There's no curiosity in
+my composition."</p>
+<p>And yet, when his two companions stood at the window of the
+little back parlor, pressing their noses against the glass, and
+looking out, he could not resist the temptation to join them,
+although he thought proper to punch them in the ribs, and call them
+a pair of inquisitive puppies, by way of showing how much he was
+superior to the great human infirmity.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="A_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>PEEPS.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The uniform row of houses on the other side of a dead waste of
+snow, to which the attention of the three friends was ardently
+directed, promised, at first sight, a poor return of instruction
+and entertainment. The rear view presented one dull stretch of
+bricks irregularly set even in those houses which displayed
+imposing fronts of brown stone. The blinds were of a faded green
+color, and broken. The stoops, the doors opening on them, and the
+steps leading down to the dirty, sodden snow, had a generic look of
+cheapness and frailty. "Whatever the censorious critic might say of
+the front, he could not charge the rear with false pretences; for
+there was apparent, all over it, an utter indifference to the
+opinions of mankind. Perhaps because the owners of the houses did
+not expect mankind to study their property from that point of
+view.</p>
+<p>"Say!" was Mr. Fayette Overtop's first remark, after a moment's
+observation; "do not those rustic fences on the roofs remind you of
+the sweet, fresh country in summer time?" Mr. Overtop alluded to
+the barriers which are erected to keep people from getting into
+each other's houses, and which are scaled not without difficulty
+even by cats.</p>
+<p>Neither of his friends answering this remark except by a quiet,
+incredulous smile, Overtop continued, a little pettishly:</p>
+<p>"And you really mean to tell me that that pastoral object,
+happily introduced on the roofs of houses, does not recall the
+green fields, daisies, babbling brooks, and cloudless skies of
+early boyhood? Humbug!" The speaker flattened his nose still more
+against the glass by way of emphasis.</p>
+<p>"You look for beauties among the chimney pots, while I search
+for them in back-parlor windows," said Matthew Maltboy. "Observe
+where I throw my eye now."</p>
+<p>Mr. Maltboy threw his eye toward a house near the middle of the
+block. His companions followed it, and saw a tall girl with
+prodigious skirts standing at a window, and looking, as they
+thought, at them. The view which she obtained was evidently not
+satisfactory, for with her handkerchief she wiped off the moisture
+from several of the panes; and, when the glass was clear to her
+liking, shook out the folds of her dress, and peered forth again,
+this time more decidedly, at the window occupied by the three
+friends. Her use of the handkerchief was not lost upon Maltboy, who
+straightway pulled out his extensive cambric, and polished up their
+window too. This improvement of the medium of vision on both sides,
+enabled the three friends to form some idea of the tall girl's
+personal charms. Her figure was straight; her hair was black; her
+eyes were brilliant; her complexion was healthy; she exhibited
+jewelry in her ears, on her neck, her bosom, her wrists, and her
+fingers; her dress gave her a great deal of trouble, as she leaned
+forward to look out.</p>
+<p>"Charming, is she not?" said Maltboy.</p>
+<p>"Hard to say, at this distance," returned Overtop, who, feeling
+neglected in the matter of the rustic fence, was controversially
+disposed.</p>
+<p>"You may find it so," said Maltboy; "but as for me, the flash of
+her eyes--there, now, for instance!--is convincing enough."</p>
+<p>"Perhaps you have seen her before," remarked Marcus
+Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>"Perhaps," was that gentleman's answer, implying, by his accent
+and accompanying wink, that he had seen her repeatedly.</p>
+<p>"And said nothing about her to us, you inveterate humbug," added
+Marcus.</p>
+<p>Mr. Maltboy felt the compliment conveyed in the word
+"humbug"--as most people do when that accusation of shrewdness and
+deep dissembling is brought against them--and smiled.</p>
+<p>"I confess," he replied, as he polished the window
+simultaneously with the performance of that process across the way,
+"I confess I have noticed her several times; but what was the use
+of mentioning it to a pair of woman haters like you?"</p>
+<p>His two companions laughed pleasantly, thereby expressing their
+gratification at the return compliment involved in the phrase
+"woman haters."</p>
+<p>"You are such dull fellows now," continued Maltboy, "that
+perhaps you will say this fair stranger is not looking at us; that
+she does not desire to be seen by us--that is, by me; and that her
+rubbing of the window with a handkerchief is not a signal which she
+expects to be answered."</p>
+<p>"We say nothing," replied the disputatious Overtop. "We only
+wait for proof. It is easy to find out whether a signal is meant or
+not. Rub the window now."</p>
+<p>Maltboy did so, concluding the act with an unmistakable flourish
+of the handkerchief. Whereupon the tall girl averted her face,
+pulled down the curtain, and eclipsed herself.</p>
+<p>Wilkeson and Overtop laughed, and, with a common impulse,
+punched Maltboy triumphantly in the ribs--a friendly salute that
+was always vastly amusing to that gentleman.</p>
+<p>"Be it understood, at this stage of affairs," said Marcus,
+solemnly, "that I reject the Overtop theory, and wash my hands of
+all responsibility for Maltboy's misdeeds.--Hallo! There he is
+again."</p>
+<p>"Who? Where?" exclaimed his two friends.</p>
+<p>"In the house nearly opposite--the one with the grape arbor.
+Isn't he a fine old fellow?"</p>
+<p>Overtop and Maltboy looked, and there saw, sitting at a window,
+and placidly gazing out of it, an old gentleman with long and thick
+white hair, a ruddy face, a white neckcloth, and a large projecting
+shirt frill--which were all the peculiarities of person and dress
+that could be distinctly made out. He was smoking a long pipe, and
+placidly rocking himself to and fro. His appearance, through the
+two windows, was that of a finely preserved relic of a past
+generation,</p>
+<p>"He always has a long pipe in his mouth, and looks benignantly
+into the open air," said Wilkeson,</p>
+<p>"So even <i>you</i> are not wholly devoid of curiosity, and do
+take some interest in the people on our block," remarked Matthew
+Maltboy,</p>
+<p>"I have noticed the old gentleman often, when I have been
+reading near the window; and own that I should like to know him. I
+think, too, from certain signs, that he would not object to knowing
+me. Unless I am much mistaken, he has bowed to me several times.
+But fearing that the supposed bow might have been nothing more than
+a sleepy nod, I have never ventured to answer it. Step back a
+moment, and see if he observes me."</p>
+<p>Maltboy and Overtop retired a few paces. A moment afterward, the
+old gentleman looked over to Wilkeson, and made a bow at him about
+which there could be no mistake.</p>
+<p>"Answer him." "Answer him," said his two friends. Acting upon
+this advice, Marcus Wilkeson, blushing, returned a courtly salute,
+which was immediately reciprocated by a still lower bow, and a
+pleasant smile from the old gentleman. Wilkeson bowed again, and
+added a smile. The old gentleman did the same; and this odd
+exchange of civilities was beginning to get awkward for Wilkeson,
+when the old gentleman's attention was suddenly called off.</p>
+<p>A slender young man, whose broad black mustache contrasted
+unpleasantly with the sallow whiteness of his face, dressed in the
+jauntiest costume of the period, and bearing in one hand a black
+cane with a large ivory handle, which looked, even in the distance,
+like a human leg, stood by the old gentleman's side. The old
+gentleman put down his pipe, seized the young man's disengaged
+hand, and gazed affectionately at him (so the three observers
+thought). Some conversation then took place between them, during
+which the old gentleman repeatedly pressed the young man's hand,
+and sometimes reached up and softly patted him on the shoulder. The
+young man appeared to receive the words and caresses of the old
+gentleman with a sullen indifference. Several times he pettishly
+drew his hand away, and at last shook his head fiercely, folded his
+arms, and seemed (though the spectators could only conjecture that)
+to stamp the floor with his foot. At this, the old gentleman bowed
+his head in his hands. The young man held his defiant attitude
+unmoved, until, glancing out of the window, he saw for the first
+time that he was watched. "With a jerk, he pulled down the curtain,
+and cut off a scene which the three observers had begun to find
+profoundly interesting.</p>
+<p>"Well," said Marcus Wilkeson, "though I have given up making
+calls as a business, I shall certainly take the New-Year's
+privilege of dropping in on the venerable unknown over the
+way."</p>
+<p>"Two things are plain," said Fayette Overtop. "One is, that the
+pale, rascally looking young man is the old man's son. Now, I don't
+suppose either of you will dispute that?" (Overtop paused a moment
+to receive and dispose of objections, but none were made.) "The
+other is, that the old fellow is immensely rich--worth a million or
+two, maybe. Perhaps you <i>would</i> like to argue that point."
+Overtop smiled, as if nothing would give him greater pleasure than
+to annihilate a few dozen opinions to the contrary.</p>
+<p>"To save argument, as usual, we admit everything," responded
+Wilkeson. "But, pray condescend to tell us how you know this fine
+old boy to be superlatively rich."</p>
+<p>Overtop smiled upon his ignorant friends, and answered:</p>
+<p>"Because he wears a white cravat. The man isn't a clergyman, is
+he? Do clergymen smoke pipes? He isn't a Quaker, is he? Do Quakers,
+or those of them who indulge in white cravats, wear their coat
+collars turned down? Consult your own experience, now, and tell me
+whether you ever saw anybody but a very rich man (with the
+exceptions already stated) wearing a white cravat. I leave it to
+your candor."</p>
+<p>Wilkeson and Maltboy nodded their heads, as if stricken dumb
+with conviction.</p>
+<p>Overtop, gratified with this ready acquiescence, modestly went
+on to say that he would not undertake to explain the phenomenon;
+that task he left to some more philosophical mind. He contented
+himself with making a humble record of facts.</p>
+<p>"And now that each of you have made a discovery in the row of
+houses, let me try my luck." Overtop rubbed the window, looked out,
+and carefully surveyed the row from end to end, and back again.
+"Ah, I have it!" he said. "A real mystery, too. Look at that
+four-story house near the western end of the block, the one a
+trifle shabbier than its neighbors. Do you see, in the open window,
+a man with a pale, intellectual face, gray hair, and arms bare to
+the elbows, filing away at something held in a vise before him? Now
+he stops to examine a paper--a plan, probably--which he holds in
+his hand. Now he wipes the perspiration from his forehead. Can't
+you see him?"</p>
+<p>"Distinctly," was the joint reply.</p>
+<p>"What do you suppose he is doing?" asked Overtop.</p>
+<p>"No idea," said Wilkeson. "Perhaps mending a teakettle."</p>
+<p>"Or repairing an umbrella," suggested Maltboy.</p>
+<p>Overtop smiled, and said:</p>
+<p>"A person with the slightest powers of observation, would see
+that that man has genius in his face; that his thin arm is not used
+to hard mechanical labor; that his brain is so heated with great
+ideas, that he tries to cool it by opening the window. The
+tinkering of an umbrella or teakettle would not make a man sweat in
+midwinter. You won't deny the force of that suggestion."</p>
+<p>As he spoke, a young girl advanced from the back part of the
+room, and stood by the pale workman's side. She wore a bonnet, and
+a shawl tightly wrapped around her. Though the features of her face
+could not be distinguished in the distance, it was not hard to
+detect a pleasant expression in her eyes, a smile on her lips, and
+a high color on her cheeks, as if she had just come in from the
+street. She held up a little basket for the workman's
+inspection.</p>
+<p>He paused in his labor, took the girl's head between his hands,
+and kissed her fondly on the brow. Then he opened the little
+basket, and drew from it a loaf of bread and a piece of cheese,
+which he began eating hurriedly. He also seemed, by signs, to press
+the girl to eat; but she shook her head, smiled more than before,
+and looked up affectionately into his face. Having bolted a few
+mouthfuls, the workman placed the remains of the repast on the
+bench or table before him, kissed the young girl, and resumed his
+work. She watched every motion of his hand with eager eyes. Once
+she moved as if to close the window, but he shook his head, and
+again wiped the sweat from his brow.</p>
+<p>He had consulted the paper, and attacked his task with fresh
+energy for the third or fourth time, when his eyes happened to rest
+upon the window full of scrutinizing faces. His lips moved in some
+sudden exclamation, and then he shut the window with vehemence, and
+drew the curtain which obscured the lower half of it.</p>
+<p>"Not a very kind reception of your theory, so far," said
+Marcus.</p>
+<p>"Prejudice--nothing more," said Overtop. "When they see that we
+have no wish to pry into their private affairs, but are animated
+with a neighborly regard for them, they will not repel our
+advances. It isn't human nature."</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="A_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>QIGG.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>During the following two weeks, up to New Year's day, the three
+friends made little progress in their observations. The tall girl
+in the immense skirts appeared rarely to reward Matthew Maltboy's
+ardent gaze, and even then seemed to look down at the dingy snow
+beneath, or the clouds overhead, or to something or somebody across
+the way, but never to the fluttering Maltboy.</p>
+<p>Nothing more was seen of the pale and grayhaired workman; for he
+kept the lower curtain of his window jealously drawn. But at night
+his shadow, strongly projected on the curtain, was in incessant
+motion; and far into the morning hours a gigantic head and arms
+shifted and blended upon it in grotesque forms. At the other window
+of the workman's apartment the young girl often sat, book in hand,
+and moved her lips as if she were reading aloud. Her eyes were
+never seen to wander to the outer world with those longings for
+freedom and fresh air which are natural to the youthful heart, but
+were always fixed upon the book, or upon some object within the
+room. She was entirely unconscious of the distant and imperfect
+scrutiny to which her form and movements were subjected by Marcus
+Wilkeson, who had begun to take a strange interest in her, and in
+the shadow on the curtain, since the healthy and amiable old
+gentleman directly opposite had ceased to smoke his pipe and
+indulge in his tranquil meditation daily.</p>
+<p>Twice only had he shown himself, and then, after a grave bow to
+Marcus Wilkeson, who returned it with more than the usual
+inclination of head, the old gentleman had taken a few whiffs at
+his pipe, looked out of the window with a troubled air, and
+vanished from the sight of his sympathizing observer, as if the
+quiet old sitting place had lost its charm for him. The young
+man--the disturbing element of the old gentleman's life, as Marcus
+Wilkeson regarded him--was not again seen in the room where he had
+made his first appearance, but was discovered, several days after
+that event, sitting at a table near a window in the second story,
+and writing industriously. His labors were evidently not
+disagreeable; for, after an hour's engagement with his pen, he
+would sit back in his chair, laugh, take a long drink from a black
+bottle which stood at his elbow, and light a fresh cigar. Whatever
+his occupation, he was completely absorbed in it, and did not
+notice the pair of keen eyes peering at him from behind a book in
+the house opposite. Every afternoon, about three o'clock, the young
+man sat at the table with his bottle, cigars, and writing
+materials, and pursued his pleasant labors.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson would never have pretended that it was not
+highly improper to watch one's neighbors. He would have denounced
+it as deserving of the severest reprobation. But he would have
+said, that if, while he was sitting, according to his invariable
+custom, at his own window, for the sole purpose of reading a book,
+people chose to bring themselves within the range of his vision, he
+was not therefore under obligations to vacate his seat. He would
+have insisted that any glances which he might have directed at his
+neighbors, were so levelled in fits of mental abstraction, or in
+the exercise of a friendly regard for them. The Overtop theory he
+discarded as fallacious, and likely to get its talented founder
+into trouble.</p>
+<p>That founder and his only follower, Maltboy, were determined,
+however, to put the new social system into practice on New Year's
+day, and had secured the ready services of Quigg, the grocer, as
+originally proposed by the sagacious Overtop. Marcus Wilkeson
+obstinately refused to participate in this projected grand tour;
+which refusal was too bad, said Overtop, because the fourth seat in
+the double sleigh that had been hired for the occasion would be
+left vacant.</p>
+<p>At last came New Year's day; and the sky was cloudless, and the
+sun was bright, and the weather was just cold enough to make the
+blood tingle pleasantly, and the snow was a foot deep, and well
+beaten down in the side streets. The elements themselves had
+conspired to give the Overtop theory every chance of success.</p>
+<p>J.M. Quigg, grocer, was elaborately attiring himself in the snug
+sleeping room behind his store, at ten o'clock on the morning of
+the eventful day. He little knew the tremendous importance of the
+part which he was about to perform. He looked upon Overtop and
+Maltboy, not as the expounders of a new social philosophy, but as
+cash customers to a considerable extent, and as partners in
+defraying the heavy expenses of a large double team. Mr. Quigg
+exercised the virtue of prudence even in his dissipations, and
+derived pleasure from the reflection that he would make his annual
+round of complimentary calls in an elegant turnout at a moderate
+cost.</p>
+<p>Therefore Mr. Quigg hummed pleasantly as he dressed himself, by
+the aid of a large mirror which he had taken for a bad debt, and
+which was the only ornament of the plainly furnished little room.
+Mr. Quigg was a man of business, and never fretted with cravats,
+nor made himself unhappy on the subject of hair. Three turns and a
+pull adjusted the former; and a half dozen well-directed dabs with
+a stiff brush regulated the latter. Fifteen minutes after he began
+his toilet, he took a comprehensive view of himself in the large
+mirror, and mentally expressed the conviction that, for a man of
+thirty-seven, he was not bad looking.</p>
+<p>Quigg was right; and his just opinion of himself was shared by
+the young widows and unmarried ladies of his acquaintance. He was
+about six feet high, with a graceful figure, and the head of a
+statesman. A more intellectual face, and a broader or more massive
+brow, assisted, perhaps, in its general effect, by a slight
+baldness, were rarely if ever seen. A distinguished professor of
+phrenology had picked out Quigg's head from among half an acre of
+heads at a lecture upon that subject in the city, and had
+pronounced it the "model head," greatly to the disgust of all the
+other large-skulled men in the hall. The professor had also assured
+Quigg, upon learning who and what he was, that it was a solemn duty
+he owed to society to abandon the grocery business, and devote
+himself to "philosophical culture, the development of the
+humanities, and the true expansion of his interior individuality."
+Notwithstanding this flattering opinion, Quigg still sanded his
+sugar, and reduced his whiskey, and found his delight as well as
+his-profit in those gross material pursuits.</p>
+<p>The interior Quigg, of whom the professor had spoken so
+hopefully, was still undeveloped. The professor's views of Quigg's
+head had, however, made a deep impression upon the owner of it, and
+had given to Quigg's ordinary observations on the weather, the
+state of his health, and the other familiar topics to which his
+remarks were principally addressed, an oracular importance in his
+own opinion. Such were the deceptive effects produced by his large,
+polished brow, and slow, imposing speech, that he always seemed to
+be on the point of uttering vital truths. But the listener's ear
+ached in vain for them.</p>
+<p>Quigg put on his overcoat, took a small glass of bitters from a
+bottle kept behind the large mirror, locked up the store, proceeded
+to the nearest restaurant, hastily despatched a lean,
+unsatisfactory chop and a cup of weak tea, gave a half dime to the
+waiter who bade him, in a loud and significant voice, "Happy New
+Year, sir," and then returning found the double sleigh punctual to
+appointment.</p>
+<p>It was a swan-shaped vehicle, brightly painted, thickly covered
+with buffalo robes, and drawn by two high-stepping horses, which
+tossed their heads and shook their bells merrily as if they shared
+in the prevailing jovialty of the day.</p>
+<p>On the front seat, and nearly filling up the whole width of the
+sleigh, sat the driver. His shoulders were broad enough for two
+men; his legs and arms were of twice the common size, and he had
+two well-defined chins. He seemed to be double in all his
+dimensions, like the sleigh.</p>
+<p>"Hallo, Quigg!" said the driver, in a voice of double strength,
+snapping his whip playfully at that gentleman as he approached.</p>
+<p>"Hallo to <i>you</i>, Cap," returned Quigg, pleasantly. "It is a
+very fine day. I guess there will be a great many calls made."
+Quigg uttered these words slowly, as if they were precious, and he
+hated to part with them.</p>
+<p>"Shouldn't wonder," answered Cap, which was a short name for
+Captain (nobody knew of what), and added, without any apparent
+sequence of ideas: "I s'pose you're goin' to take some brandy
+along, old fellow? It's hardly fair for me to be sittin' into the
+cold outside, with nothin' to drink, while you chaps are drinkin'
+your champagne punch before a warm fire."</p>
+<p>Mr. Quigg reflected a moment, as one who reckons up profit and
+loss. He then said:</p>
+<p>"A good idea, Cap. Brandy is not a bad thing on a cold day." He
+spoke with impressive solemnity.</p>
+<p>"Or any other day," added the driver. "Partickley 'lection day.
+Leastways, such was the 'pinion of the voters into my ward, last
+December, when I run for School Inspector, you know. Unfortunately,
+I didn't know the ropes then; and thought, when I got the
+nomination, I was sure to be 'lected. My 'ponent issued tickets for
+free drinks at all the rum mills into the ward. I didn't find out
+his game till about two o'clock in the afternoon, and then I tried
+it myself. But I was too late. He had six hours' start of me, and
+beat me by five hundred drinks--I mean votes."</p>
+<p>Mr. Quigg nodded, and said, "Of course," as if he had often
+heard of such instances, and there was nothing surprising in them.
+He then abruptly cut off the Captain's political reminiscences, by
+unlocking the store and entering it. After a few minutes' absence,
+he returned with a half-gallon jug and a tin dipper.</p>
+<p>"A nice, fat little feller," rapturously exclaimed Captain
+Tonkins, taking the proffered jug. Placing it in the bottom of the
+sleigh, where such of the public as were stirring in that vicinity
+could not see the operation, he half filled the tin dipper, and,
+raising it suddenly to his mouth, drank the contents with a double
+gulp. "Prime stuff, that," said the Captain, smacking his lips. "A
+hogshead of it would make a school commissioner, an alderman, mebbe
+a major of you, Quigg."</p>
+<p>"I dare say," said Quigg. "But what would a dull, practical
+fellow like me be good for in public life?" This was Quigg's
+habitual way of depreciating himself, and it always impressed the
+hearer with a sense of Quigg's eminent ability.</p>
+<p>Quigg then drew a pair of yellow gloves on his large, hairy
+hands, slightly ripping the two thumbs and most of the fingers in
+the operation, took a seat in the double sleigh, and proclaimed
+himself ready to start.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="A_CHAPTER_V."></a>CHAPTER V.</h2>
+<h3>PLEASURE AS BUSINESS.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Captain Tonkins cracked his whip with professional sonority over
+the heads of his lively horses, and they started off at a slapping
+pace, which brought them to the house of the three friends before
+the bells had fairly begun to jingle in unison. The door was
+instantly opened, and Overtop and Maltboy presented themselves,
+dressed in the most elaborate and captivating style. Marcus
+Wilkeson appeared just behind them, in his dressing gown and
+slippers, calmly smoking his well-browned Meerschaum.</p>
+<p>After the salutations of the day, both Overtop and Maltboy
+addressed a last appeal to Marcus to give up his ridiculous
+prejudices, and join the party; but he obstinately refused, saying
+that he should make only one call, and that was upon the old
+gentleman over the way.</p>
+<p>The arrangements for the day had already been made. The party
+were to call on a few dozen of Quigg's customers (selected from a
+carefully prepared list of one hundred) within range of a mile or
+two; also on a few friends of Overtop and Maltboy, who could not
+well be slighted, and then come back to the block.</p>
+<p>Quigg looked upon the day as one of business, and not of
+pleasure, and had methodized a system of callmaking, which was
+submitted to his companions, and highly approved by them. The order
+of exercises was as follows: First, a jerk at the doorbell; second,
+precipitate entrance, hat in hand; third, "Happy New Year," remark
+on fine weather, and introduction of friends; fourth, a second
+remark on fine weather, or any other one remark which might occur
+to friends on inspiration of moment; fifth, acceptance of one sip
+of wine, and one bite of cake, if any offered, with compliments on
+excellence of both; sixth, reference to list in hand, observation
+on the necessity of retiring, and regret for the same; seventh,
+precipitate retreat.</p>
+<p>The system did not work smoothly at first, in consequence of
+Overtop's and Maltboy's strained, excessive efforts to make
+themselves agreeable. It happened that, at the first two or three
+houses visited, Maltboy discovered charming young ladies, and could
+not resist the temptation to linger beyond the prescribed minutes,
+and talk trifles to them. It also fell out, that Overtop found a
+number of those sensible women for whom his heart ever longed, and
+whose starving souls, as he called them, were not to be satisfied
+with the dry crust of ordinary compliment. To them, therefore, he
+addressed observations on the inner or spiritual significance of
+the New Year's call; on the reminiscences of childhood suggested by
+sleigh bells; on the typical meaning of snow as the shroud of
+death, and, at the same time, the warming garment of coming life;
+on wine or lemonade (as the case might be), as an emblem of
+hospitality; and on many other little things as expressive of the
+loftiest truths.</p>
+<p>It was only after earnest remonstrances from Quigg, that the
+discursive Overtop brought himself down to the rules of the day. In
+deference to Quigg, Mr. Maltboy also steeled his too susceptible
+heart against the attractions which he was perpetually
+encountering, and kept strictly to the weather. He, as well as
+Overtop, was surprised to find that the single stereotyped
+observation, "It's a fine day," was, after all, more acceptable
+than a longer and more strikingly original remark for it imposed no
+tax upon the conversational resources of the ladies, and left them
+unfatigued to succeeding scores of visitors.</p>
+<p>About this time, it was observed of Captain Tonkins that he
+began to show signs of fatigue, rocking heavily in his seat with
+every oscillation of the sleigh, and talking thick like a jaded
+man. These phenomena seeming to require some explanation, the
+Captain stated that he had been up late the past three nights, and
+could keep himself awake only by taking occasional draughts of
+Quigg's brandy. The Captain then proceeded to indulge in random
+recollections of his political career, and withering denunciations
+of one Larry Mulcahy, his successful rival for the office of School
+Inspector, whom the Captain did not hesitate to brand as a
+jailbird.</p>
+<p>When the party returned to the block where the Overtop theory
+was to be tested, Mr. Quigg's services were found invaluable. He
+had not only been the principal grocer in the vicinity for five
+years, but he had served on Ward Committees for the relief of the
+poor at other people's expense, and had participated largely in
+those admirable institutions for the promotion of matrimony known
+as Sociables. Therefore, Quigg knew about everybody on the block
+worth knowing. There were a few persons in that old house near the
+corner, who sent in for herrings, cheap butter, and pounds of
+flour, and whom, of course, he did not know. There was a queer old
+Dutchman in that square, old-fashioned house in the middle of the
+block, whom neither he nor anybody else knew.</p>
+<p>They went through half of the south side of the block, and found
+only plain and commonplace people. Overtop and Maltboy began to be
+weary. The former was gradually discovering that his theory was a
+bore. The latter wondered whether Quigg knew the tall girl,
+concerning the identity of the front part of whose residence
+Maltboy was at fault, although he knew every brick of the rear.</p>
+<p>"In this 'ere house," said Quigg, "I shall be treated rudely,
+because they owe me fifty dollars for groceries. It's a curious
+fact, but I have noticed that debtors always act kind o' cold to
+creditors, as if it was the creditors that owed the money."</p>
+<p>Mr. Quigg spoke with an important air, as if he had made an
+original discovery in human nature.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="A_CHAPTER_VI."></a>CHAPTER VI.</h2>
+<h3>SOMETHING HIDDEN.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>While this exploring party were going through the block, Mr.
+Marcus Wilkeson dressed himself with more than usual care,
+preparatory to a call upon the unknown old gentleman over the way,
+who that very morning had appeared at his window, the first time in
+three days, and tendered the compliments of the season in two low
+bows and a smile. Having carefully adjusted his necktie, and
+smoothed the creases of his gloves, Mr. Wilkeson grasped his old
+friend, a hickory cane, by its sturdy elbow, and marched forth to
+make his solitary visit.</p>
+<p>As 'he turned the corner of the street upon which the unknown
+old gentleman's residence was situated, thinking of the oddity of
+the call he was about to make, and half inclined to abandon it, he
+saw, in a doorway a few yards in front of him, a little girl who
+bore a striking resemblance to the patient creature that he had
+often noticed sitting at a window in the room of the pale mechanic.
+A single glance at the cracked and dirty front of the building
+established its connection with the weather-stained and shaky rear
+premises in which the worker toiled at his strange task from
+morning to night, and far into the morning again.</p>
+<p>The little girl was earnestly talking with a rough,
+hungry-looking fellow in a greasy cap and tattered blue overalls.
+As Marcus approached, he heard the following fragment of
+conversation:</p>
+<p>"Yer can't fool this child again, now, I tell yer. Why don't he
+pay me? <i>that's</i> what I want to know. I <i>will</i> go up."
+The man stepped forward, as if to ascend the stairs.</p>
+<p>"Please don't, Mr. Gilsum," said the girl, in a sweet, pleading
+tone, laying a red and toilworn little hand softly on his arm.
+"Papa will pay you next week. He will, believe me, sir."</p>
+<p>"So you told me last week," growled Mr. Gilsum, "and the week
+before that. It's all humbug. Why don't he pay me now?
+<i>that's</i> what I want to know." Again he put a foot forward,
+and was again restrained by the hand of the little girl.</p>
+<p>"I have tried very hard to earn money, Mr. Gilsum," said the
+musical and plaintive voice, <i>but</i> have been disappointed.
+Next week I am sure I will have some for you."</p>
+<p>"Pshaw!" ejaculated the man, pulling the greasy cap over his
+eyes in a spirit of savage determination. "I can't waste time
+talking. I <i>will</i> find out why he don't pay me now."</p>
+<p>The inexorable Mr. Gilsum pushed aside the feeble hand of the
+little girl, and was about to go up the stairs in good earnest,
+when Marcus Wilkeson, who had lingered near the door to catch the
+exact purport of the conversation, called out to him:</p>
+<p>"Hallo, my friend! what's the row?"</p>
+<p>Mr. Gilsum stopped, and, turning, said snappishly:</p>
+<p>"None of yer business. Unless," he prudently added, "yer a
+friend of the comical old chap up stairs, and want to pay his
+debts."</p>
+<p>"I am a friend, and I will pay them," rejoined Marcus, speaking
+from the impulse of the moment. Since he had become rich, and could
+afford the luxury, he frequently spoke and acted upon impulse,
+without regard to consequences.</p>
+<p>Mr. Gilsum's face suddenly changed from an aspect of moroseness
+to one of bewitching amiability. He stood in the doorway, and
+said:</p>
+<p>"It's only a matter of ten shillings, sir, for brass and screws,
+and little odds and ends from my shop--the locksmith's shop over in
+the next street--you may remember it, sir. I'm sure I don't want to
+be hard on the gentleman."</p>
+<p>To cut short explanations, which he hated, Marcus paid the
+locksmith his ten shillings, and suggested that he need not wait
+longer. The locksmith, having received the money, thought it
+incumbent upon him to apologize and explain still further, till
+Marcus took hold of the door, as if to close it, when he accepted
+the hint, and departed, mumbling an apology as he went.</p>
+<p>The young girl, who had looked on in amazement, turned a pair of
+soft blue eyes toward the face of the stranger, and said:</p>
+<p>"Papa will thank you very much, sir."</p>
+<p>Marcus now had an opportunity to observe her more closely. Her
+figure was slightly formed, and undersized for her apparent age of
+seventeen years. Her face would have been plain, but for one
+peculiarity which made it charming, in his practised judgment. This
+rare excellence was her complexion, which showed a perfect pink and
+white, without roughness, spot, or blemish, under the strong light
+of a noonday sun, made more dazzling by its reflection from the
+snow. Marcus had never seen but one such complexion, and that was
+many years ago. He looked at it in silent wonder, until the
+delicate bloom in the centre of her cheeks began to invade the
+neighboring white, and the large blue eyes drooped in
+confusion.</p>
+<p>"Pardon me, my child," said Marcus, in a gentle, reassuring
+voice.</p>
+<p>She looked up, much embarrassed, and said:</p>
+<p>"Will you be so good as to walk up and see my poor father, sir?
+He will be delighted to meet a friend, for he is very much in want
+of one, sir."</p>
+<p>"I do not know him, my child; but I should be happy to make his
+acquaintance."</p>
+<p>The girl was surprised to learn that her father's benefactor was
+a stranger to him, and looked doubtingly at him for a moment--but
+only a moment--and then ran briskly up the stairs, asking him to
+follow.</p>
+<p>The stairs were uncarpeted, and had little feet-worn hollows in
+the middle of them. The banisters were rickety, and had been
+notched by the knives of reckless tenants. The first and second
+floors were occupied by different families (so Marcus inferred from
+the distinct set of baby cries issuing from each), and the halls
+were dirty, and flavored with a decided odor of washing day. But on
+the third story he saw a clean, white floor, and drew breaths of
+pure air from an open rear window, and heard no noise save the dull
+sound of filing.</p>
+<p>The little girl paused a second at a door bearing the
+inscription, "Private," asked the visitor to please wait, and
+opened the door just wide enough to admit her body, and entered,
+nearly closing it behind her. In the one glance which Marcus then
+obtained of the interior of the room, he saw the pale mechanic
+hastily rise from a jumble of cog wheels before him, and put up a
+screen to shelter his work from observation, after which he stepped
+forward, or rather sprang, to meet his child.</p>
+<p>Mr. Wilkeson heard a few words of hurried conversation between
+the father and daughter, and then the door was thrown wide open,
+and the mechanic stood in full view. He was a man of medium height,
+of a spare build, and attired in faded, seedy black. His head
+seemed altogether too large for his body; and his almost livid
+complexion, hollow cheeks, and gleaming eyes, told a story of
+constant and consuming thought. The strange, fixed glitter of his
+eyes was unpleasant to behold. Marcus had noticed the same thing in
+insane persons.</p>
+<p>"My name is Minford," said the mechanic, in a deep and solemn
+voice, "and I thank you for saving me from the annoying visits of
+that impertinent fellow. I beg, sir, that you will give me your
+address, and assure you that the sum shall positively be repaid to
+you next week."</p>
+<p>"Never mind the repayment," said Marcus, kindly. "The sum was a
+trifle for me."</p>
+<p>The mechanic's eyes flashed with new fire, and his lower lip
+curved with pride, as he answered:</p>
+<p>"But I shall insist on returning it, sir. We are temporarily
+poor, sir; but we are not beggars yet, I trust that, some day, we
+shall be in a position to confer benefits, instead of receiving
+them."</p>
+<p>Marcus knew that the man was turning over in his mind the
+troublesome question of "MOTIVE," with which so many people like to
+make themselves unhappy; and he therefore said:</p>
+<p>"I took the liberty of assisting you, sir, because I am a
+neighbor of yours, living on the other side of the block, in a
+house which can be plainly seen from your window; and I think it is
+the duty of neighbors to be neighborly, on New Year's day at least.
+My name is Marcus Wilkeson."</p>
+<p>The mechanic's face assumed a pleasanter expression. "Perhaps,"
+said he, "you are the gentleman that I have sometimes seen sitting
+with a book, in a window covered with grape vines?"</p>
+<p>"I am," returned Marcus.</p>
+<p>"As a scholar, then--as one who is superior to mean motives and
+vulgar curiosity--you are welcome to my poor home. Pray, walk in,
+sir. Pet, give the gentleman a chair."</p>
+<p>The girl, whose face had been clouded during the first part of
+this conversation, brightened up at its close, and obeyed her
+father with alacrity, brushing the clean chair with her
+handkerchief, to make it the more acceptable to their visitor. She
+also took his hat and cane, and placed them carefully away.</p>
+<p>The room was simply but neatly furnished, and very clean. The
+hand of taste and order was everywhere visible. Snow-white curtains
+festooned the two small windows, and concealed all of a turn-up
+bedstead but two of its legs. A small array of white crockery shone
+from an open closet; and a squat-looking stove, which made the
+apartment agreeably warm, was smartly polished, and was evaporating
+cheerful music out of a bright teakettle. Through a door partly
+ajar could be seen another room, covered with a rag carpet, and the
+companion of the first in simplicity and neatness.</p>
+<p>Marcus had not intended to look at the mechanic's corner, which
+was almost completely screened from view, being desirous to justify
+the high opinion which Mr. Minford had expressed of him; but his
+eyes were irresistibly attracted to the mysterious spot, and
+obtained a clearer glimpse, through an open space between the two
+screens, of a something composed of cogwheels, springs, bands, and
+levers. His host, observing this casual glance, much to the guest's
+mortification, rose, and placed the screens close together at right
+angles, thus shutting out a view of the corner.</p>
+<p>Mr. Minford opened his lips as if to offer some explanation of
+the act, but did not offer it. A moment afterward, he said:</p>
+<p>"I have not always been a poor man, Mr. Wilkeson. Six years ago
+I possessed a handsome fortune, which enabled me to pursue certain
+philosophical experiments, in which I had taken great interest, at
+leisure. An unfortunate speculation in real estate, year before
+last, nearly ruined me. I converted the remains of my property into
+cash, and went on with my experiments, undiscouraged. Like all
+laborers in the cause of science--which is the cause of humanity--I
+have met with many obstacles. Several times, when I have been on
+the point of perfecting my great invention, some small, unforeseen
+difficulty has occurred, compelling me to reconstruct large
+portions of the machinery. Eighteen months passed away, and I found
+myself penniless. I tried to borrow money, but without success.
+Now, who do you suppose has supported us the last three
+months?"</p>
+<p>"Some benevolent relative, perhaps," said Mr. Wilkeson,
+hazarding a wild guess.</p>
+<p>"You are right, sir. And a near and dear relative it is--no
+other than my little Pet here." Mr. Minford placed his right hand
+fondly on the shining head of the young girl, who sat on a low
+stool by his side, looking into his face.</p>
+<p>She blushed deeply, and said:</p>
+<p>"You forget the unknown good friend who sent the letters with
+money to you, papa."</p>
+<p>"No, no, I don't, Pet," continued Mr. Minford, patting her
+playfully on the cheeks; "but you were the dearest and sweetest of
+my guardian angels. You know you were, you rogue. Why, sir, you
+will hardly believe it, but this little creature, when she knew our
+money was nearly gone, taught herself the art of embroidery, with
+the aid of some illustrations from an old magazine, and in less
+than a fortnight could work so beautifully, that she was able to
+earn from three to four dollars a week. When she first told me that
+she was going out to look for work, I opposed it fiercely; but the
+obstinate little Pet would have her way. She was lucky enough to
+get a job from a milliner, and pleased her employer so well, that
+steady work was given to her, until last week, when the
+kind-hearted lady died, and now little Pet has nothing to do. Some
+people think, because she is young--"</p>
+<p>"Please don't talk about me any more, papa," said Pet, who had
+been blushing deeply, and looking very beautiful in the visitor's
+eyes. "You forget what the postman used to bring you every
+Saturday."</p>
+<p>"No, I don't, you little, troublesome, impertinent Pet. I was
+just about to speak of it, when you interrupted me. You must know,
+Mr. Wilkeson, that every Saturday the postman, on his first morning
+round, delivered to me a letter, marked 'New York City,' containing
+two dollars, without a word of writing inside, and addressed to me
+in large capitals, each nearly half an inch long. The object of
+this singular style of address was either to make it so plain that
+the postman could not mistake, or to disguise some handwriting
+which otherwise I might recognize. Now, as I have no relatives
+living, and no friends that I know of, who would lend me a dollar
+except on the best security, I am greatly puzzled, as you may
+suppose, to guess the name of my unknown benefactor. Generous man!
+For aught I know, he may now be dead, or himself reduced to
+poverty; for, last Saturday, the regular weekly remittance failed
+to come."</p>
+<p>"Then I see that I am just in season to help you," said Marcus
+Wilkeson, who, during the recital of this brief history, had
+decided upon his course of action.</p>
+<p>"I thank you most gratefully," returned Mr. Minford, "and fully
+appreciate the noble motives of your conduct. Your appearance
+convinces me that you are entirely disinterested. But I should feel
+ashamed to take money from you, without giving some security for
+its repayment. I shall therefore insist upon making over to you a
+certain interest in the invention, the most valuable of modern
+times, which lies almost finished behind those screens. Let me give
+you some idea of it, and you can then decide how much money you
+will advance, merely as a matter of business. I cannot consent to
+put our negotiations upon any other ground. The invention, then,
+is--" The speaker looked at the corner as he spoke, and paused.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson knew that the inventor was about to part with
+his secret unwillingly, and that he would regret it forever after.
+To save him from unpleasant feelings on that score, and to maintain
+friendly relations between them for the future, Marcus put a stop
+to the reluctant disclosure. He said:</p>
+<p>"Never mind it, Mr. Minford. I know nothing of mechanical
+matters, and take no interest in them. Your explanation would only
+be wasted on me. Besides, it is entirely uncalled for, as I am
+willing to take your own opinion of the invention, and will pay you
+five hundred dollars for a one-tenth interest in it, if those terms
+will suit." Marcus took a keen delight in acting upon this singular
+impulse, and was sorry he had not said a "thousand," when he saw
+the glow of happiness that irradiated the sweet face of Pet, still
+sitting on the stool by her father's side.</p>
+<p class="ctr"><img src="images/047.png" width="60%" alt=""><br>
+<b>THE BOY BOG.</b></p>
+<p>"Heaven bless you, sir!" said Mr. Minford. "You will be the
+means not only of relieving me and my dear child, but also of
+conferring the boon of a great discovery upon mankind. But your
+terms are too liberal, sir. I shall insist upon assigning one fifth
+of my right to you, which, mark my prediction, will prove of itself
+a fortune. Furthermore, I feel that I ought, if only to show my
+complete confidence in you, to tell you what it is. It is--" Mr.
+Minford hesitated for a word.</p>
+<p>"Now I beg, as a particular favor, that you won't tell me," said
+Marcus, goodhumoredly. "If you bore me with any of those dull
+details, I'll--I'll take back my offer. As to the proportion of the
+invention which I am to have, I will accept one fifth, since you
+insist on it, not because I want it, but that we may not say
+another word about the matter."</p>
+<p>"As you please, sir. But how shall I sufficiently thank
+you?"</p>
+<p>Marcus, who was already overcome with the gratitude which shone
+from the large, soft eyes of the young girl, answered, with a laugh
+and a blush (he had not outgrown the habit of reddening on
+occasions):</p>
+<p>"By changing the subject."</p>
+<p>Mr. Minford was about to protest against this extraordinary
+method of thanking a benefactor, when a rap was heard at the
+door.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="A_CHAPTER_VII."></a>CHAPTER VII.</h2>
+<h3>THE BOY BOG.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>In reply to the invitation, "Come in," a tall boy opened the
+door, and started back on seeing a stranger.</p>
+<p>"Do come in, Bog," said Mr. Minford. "I have good news to tell
+you. This is a friend of ours, Mr. Wilkeson. What with his running
+of errands, and doing little jobs for us, we really couldn't get
+along without him. Oh, walk in, Bog; you're always welcome
+here."</p>
+<p>"Now <i>do</i> come in, Bog," added the little girl, in a
+winning tone, rising from her stool, stepping to the door, and
+placing a hand on his shoulder.</p>
+<p>The new comer, after a few shuffles on the threshold, and an
+unintelligible murmur of words, walked in with painful awkwardness,
+and took a seat upon a corner of the chair which Pet offered him,
+as if the whole chair were more of a favor than he could
+conscientiously accept; He was a bony, strongly built stripling,
+with a record of anywhere from seventeen to nineteen years written
+in his red, resolute, honest face. He wore a coarse but neat suit
+of boy's clothes, one inch too small in every dimension, a white
+turn-down collar, and a black neckerchief fastidiously tied; and
+carried a slouched cloth cap in his hand, with which he slapped his
+knees alternately, after he had taken a seat, and continued to do
+so without cessation.</p>
+<p>"Well, Bog," said Mr. Minford, kindly, but condescendingly, "you
+are just in time to hear good news. This gentleman has taken a
+partnership in my invention (Mr. Minford thought it best to state
+the case that way), and, with his assistance, I shall be able to
+complete it and bring it before the public immediately."</p>
+<p>"Glad to hear it, sir," answered the boy Bog, blushing hard,
+lifting his eyes from the floor long enough to glance at Mr.
+Minford and his daughter, and all the while slapping his knees
+vigorously.</p>
+<p>"He is in the bill-posting business," said Mr. Minford to
+Marcus. "You may have seen him at the head of his company of
+walking advertisers. Ha! ha!"</p>
+<p>Marcus remembered having seen that honest face, that thick head
+of hair, and that identical cap, sticking out of the top of a
+portable wooden frame covered with placards, setting forth the
+virtues of quack medicines, the excellencies of dry goods, or the
+unequalled attractions of concert saloons. He also remembered that
+this wooden frame was much taller than any of the long procession
+of frames which followed it, and that, from a hole in the right
+side thereof, protruded a fist about the size of the boy Bog's,
+clutching a broomstick, with which the inmate kept a semblance of
+order among the wilful and eccentric occupants of the frames behind
+him. "Oh, yes; I have seen you very often, Bog. How do you like the
+business?" said Marcus, pleasantly.</p>
+<p>"Very well, sir, thank you," replied Bog, with his eyes still on
+the floor, "'cept when the boys poke fun at us; 'cos we can't run
+after 'em in them boxes, and wollop 'em. 'S rather hard, that." Bog
+caught Miss Minford's eye as he concluded these remarks, and
+blushed till he perspired, to think that he should have dropped
+such a brutal observation in presence of that young lady.</p>
+<p>Mr. Minford noticed the confusion of his young friend, and
+unintentionally added to it, by saying:</p>
+<p>"Bog is a good boy. By his industry, he earns eight or ten
+dollars a week, not only supporting himself, but his aunt."</p>
+<p>"Not this week, nor last week neither, Mr. Minford," said Bog,
+mopping the modest sweat from his brow with the sleeve of his coat.
+"The adv'tisin' line a'n't as good as't used to be. I only got
+three jobs with my company the last fortnight, and nary cent of pay
+from any of 'em. Of course, all my boys had to be paid just the
+same."</p>
+<p>"And you paid them?" asked Marcus.</p>
+<p>"Certainly," said Bog.</p>
+<p>"Then be good enough to accept five dollars from me, as a reward
+for your honesty," said Marcus, acting upon another of his
+impulses.</p>
+<p>"No, thank you, sir. No, thank you," returned Bog, quickly, to
+prevent Marcus from pulling the money out of his pocket. "I sha'n't
+take it, sir; I won't have it anyway. I'm goin' into the reg'lar
+bill-postin' business, as Jack Fink's assistant, to-morrow, and can
+earn all I want." Bog blushed, but this time with honest pride,
+though he was flustered to look up and see that Miss Minford nodded
+in approval of his independent spirit.</p>
+<p>Bog then slapped each knee about a dozen times with his cap, and
+betrayed many symptoms of fever heat and great mental distress.
+After which, he said that he had only called to see if he could do
+anything for them.</p>
+<p>"Now do you mean to tell us that it is not a regular New Year's
+call," said Mr. Minford, playfully, "and that you have not a dozen
+more to make?"</p>
+<p>Bog looked guilty of an enormous fraud, dropped his cap, in his
+confusion, twice, murmured something inaudible, rose to his feet,
+and backed out of the room, making one comprehensive bow to
+everybody, and saying "Good-night" before it was two P.M.</p>
+<p>As Bog shut the door, everybody laughed, but not so loud as to
+be heard by the boy; and, under the cover of the general good
+humor, Marcus rose, and said that he must go. He was afraid he had
+made his visit too long for a first one. He would call again on the
+following day, if agreeable, and complete the proposed arrangement.
+In conclusion, he placed his card in Mr. Minford's hand, with the
+names of a few references pencilled on the margin.</p>
+<p>Mr. Minford was very sorry that their pleasant acquaintance
+should take his leave so abruptly, and hoped that they would enjoy
+many visits from him, not merely as a business partner (Mr. Minford
+laid emphasis on this), but as a friend.</p>
+<p>Pet repeated her father's regrets and hopes in the more
+impressive language of her sweet eyes, and, for the twentieth time
+that day, conjured up, in the memory of Marcus Wilkeson, a vague
+reminiscence of the distant past.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="A_CHAPTER_VIII."></a>CHAPTER VIII.</h2>
+<h3>MALTBOY'S TWENTIETH AFFAIR.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The house which had elicited Quigg's last sagacious remark, was
+a three-story brownstone front, and was one of the finest looking
+on the south side. The heavy mahogany door was opened by a slovenly
+girl, who ushered the callers into the front parlor, which was
+carefully darkened, according to the custom of the day. The only
+objects plainly visible were two female figures, each seated near a
+front window, under the rosy shade of damask curtains artfully
+disposed. One of the ladies, whom Matthew Maltboy was not slow to
+recognize, looked like a fountain of pink silk, gushing out with
+great vehemence in high, curving jets on every side; from which
+fountain a slim, graceful figure had risen, as far as the waist,
+like a modern Arethusa. The gleam of a shapely neck, of a pearl
+necklace and diamond cross, of diamond earrings, of an enormous
+gold brooch, of golden gyves an inch broad on each wrist, as the
+rose-tinted rays fell on those natural and artificial charms,
+produced a dazzling effect in the shady corner. On plainer persons,
+this display might have seemed, in Maltboy's eyes, a glaring
+instance of bad taste. But, looking at that small, oval face, those
+large, flashing black eyes, complexion of red and white, so
+beautifully blended that it hardly seemed a work of nature, pouting
+lips, even, white teeth, and heavily braided hair, Maltboy thought
+that no decorations could be-too gaudy for a creature of such
+radiant loveliness.</p>
+<p>At the same instant (as their feet passed the parlor threshold)
+that Maltboy made these comprehensive observations, the quick eyes
+of Fayette Overtop were scanning the lady that basked in the
+subdued light of the other window. She rose from a smaller fountain
+of silk to a less height than her companion. She was fat to such a
+degree, that the bodice of her dress seemed ready to burst with the
+excessive pressure beneath, immediately suggesting to every
+beholder the obvious humanity of enlarging it, by taking only a
+small portion from the superfluous silk below. She was quite
+pretty, and very healthy, and had a smile lurking on her lips, and
+in the corners of her small blue eyes, and in the dimples of her
+round, red cheeks, and in the curved crease which was beginning to
+show under her apple of a chin. She wore plain colors, and
+exhibited no ornaments save a large brooch with braided hair in it.
+The lean Overtop immediately felt a tender inclination toward this
+fat young lady.</p>
+<p>Mr. Quigg paid the compliments of the season in his neat,
+settled style, to Miss Whedell--the tall young lady--who received
+them with marked coldness, and then begged leave to introduce
+Messrs. Overtop and Maltboy, to whom she smiled graciously, rising
+slightly from her chair, and sinking back again, without disturbing
+the symmetrical flow of the silken fountain. With a wave of her
+jewelled right hand she performed the ceremony of introduction
+between the three callers and Mrs. Frump--the fat young lady--who
+also carefully raised herself about two inches from her chair, and
+lowered herself again, without disarranging a ripple.</p>
+<p>In compliance with an invitation from Miss Whedell, the three
+callers sat down. Mr. Maltboy gravitated by a natural instinct to
+the side of his charmer. Mr. Overtop was drawn by an irresistible
+impulse into the vicinity of Mrs. Frump, having detected in her
+general appearance certain indications of what he called "a
+sensible woman." Mr. Quigg, feeling that he was one too many, took
+a "seat equally removed from the two ladies, and commenced playing
+soft tunes on his hat, and looking vacantly about the room.</p>
+<p>"I had begun to wonder, Mr. Maltboy," said Miss Whedell, "what
+makes our friends so backward to-day. I do declare, we have not had
+a caller for more than--how long is it, Gusty, since Colonel
+Bigford dropped in?"</p>
+<p>Maltboy thought her voice had a sweet, metallic ring.</p>
+<p>"About half an hour," replied Mrs. Frump, after a brief mental
+calculation.</p>
+<p>"Why, Gusty!" exclaimed Miss Whedell; "how can you sit there and
+tell such stories? You know it is not five minutes."</p>
+<p>"Just as you please, dear," said Mrs. Frump, leaving on the
+minds of her hearers the impression that her estimate was the
+correct one.</p>
+<p>"I never saw anything so slow," pursued Miss Whedell. "Would you
+believe it, Mr. Maltboy--here are two hours gone, and we have not
+had more than--how many callers have we had, Gusty? You keep
+account of them."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Frump drew out a little memorandum book from one of her
+pockets, and consulted. "Exactly eleven, Clemmy," said she.</p>
+<p>"Gusty Frump," returned Miss Whedell, with some warmth, "you
+ought to be ashamed of yourself! We have had fifty callers, to my
+certain knowledge."</p>
+<p>"I presume you are right," said Mrs. Frump, with a smile that
+irradiated the whole of her fat face, and again imparted the idea
+that Miss Whedell was wrong.</p>
+<p>"For one," said Matthew Maltboy, improving the opportunity to
+put in a word, "I should not be surprised to learn that you had a
+hundred."</p>
+<p>Miss Whedell appreciated the delicate compliment, and beamed
+fascination upon him.</p>
+<p>"It has been a horrid, dreary winter, has it not, Mr. Maltboy?"
+said she, in a tone that invited sympathy and confidence.</p>
+<p>Mr. Maltboy, supposing that she alluded to the prevalent snow
+and ice of the season, said that it certainly had.</p>
+<p>"No balls, no opera--or none to speak of--no parties, no
+anything. You will hardly believe it, Mr. Maltboy, but I declare I
+haven't been to twenty parties this winter--have I, Gusty?"</p>
+<p>"To only two that I know of," responded Mrs. Frump, in a winning
+voice.</p>
+<p>"You provoking creature," said Miss Whedell, "to talk so, when
+you know that I have been to at least eighteen parties!" Miss
+Whedell scowled charmingly as she spoke, and then added, with a
+pleasant smile, for the benefit of Mr. Maltboy: "She's a gay young
+widow; and you know what widows are."</p>
+<p>Mr. Maltboy's knowledge of that species of the human family was
+extensive and exact. He nodded, to signify that he knew something
+of them, and felt forearmed, from that moment, against the charms
+of Mrs. Frump.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Frump told Miss Whedell that she thanked her very much for
+the compliment, and laughed so prettily, that Fayette Overtop
+determined to apply some of his grand tests for the discovery of
+sensible women.</p>
+<p>Abandoning the vein of commonplace conversation which he had
+worked during the five minutes since his arrival, he remarked:</p>
+<p>"It really makes us feel young again--does it not, Mrs.
+Frump?--to renew this charming custom of receiving and making
+calls."</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop spoke in general terms, like a philosopher; whereas
+Mrs. Frump made a personal application of the remark to herself,
+and replied, rather coldly: "I have no doubt that it makes
+<i>old</i> persons feel younger," and then she looked at Matthew
+Maltboy, and seemed to be listening to the conversation between him
+and Miss Whedell.</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop paused a moment, and tried again: "Is it not
+pleasant, though sad, Mrs. Frump, to think of the friends whom we
+knew many, many years ago, who no longer live to greet us on this
+festal day?" The speaker alluded to mankind at large.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Frump responded tartly, that she could not speak from
+experience, of course, but she presumed that Mr. Overtop's opinion
+was correct. And again she glanced at Maltboy.</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop briefly rested, and then remarked:</p>
+<p>"It may be merely a poetical conceit of mine, but it seems to me
+that the horses prance higher, and shake their bells more merrily
+on New Year's than any other day, as if they partook in our
+enjoyment of the occasion. May not the horse, by some mysterious
+instinct, know that it is the beginning of the year?"</p>
+<p>Mrs. Frump smiled, and answered: "Not being a horse, of course I
+can't say. But I would suggest, whether ostlers do not give their
+animals an extra quantity of oats on New Year's day, to make their
+action more stylish?"</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop marked a quizzical expression in the widow's left
+eye, and was disgusted.</p>
+<p>For the third time she looked intently at Matthew Maltboy, who
+was putting in a few words with great animation; and then turned
+her face toward Mr. Quigg, who was taking his third mental
+inventory of the furniture, and executing "Hail Columbia," with
+variations, on his hat.</p>
+<p>"It's a finer New Year's day than the last one, is it not, Mr.
+Quigg?"</p>
+<p>Mr. Quigg, who had an astonishing memory for dates and
+conditions of the weather, replied, after a second's
+reflection:</p>
+<p>"It is a much finer day, Mrs. Frump. It rained last New Year's.
+Perhaps you may remember my leaving an umbrella at the house where
+you were then stopping, in Sixteenth street, and my calling for it
+again, on which occasion you said I reminded you of Paul Pry, in
+the play, who was always forgetting his umbrella."</p>
+<p>The widow laughed, and said that she distinctly remembered the
+circumstances.</p>
+<p>Mr. Quigg, thus encouraged, went on:</p>
+<p>"New Year's days differ very much. The one before the last was
+very snowy in the forenoon, with hail in the afternoon; and the one
+before that was so mild, that I found an overcoat really
+uncomfortable. The one before--"</p>
+<p>"Excuse me for the interruption," said Mrs. Frump, suddenly,
+"but I can't help saying how much Mr. Maltboy looks like Dr. Warts.
+Doesn't he, Clemmy?"</p>
+<p>"Like Dr. Warts!" exclaimed Miss Whedell. "Who's he?"</p>
+<p>"Why, don't you remember, Clemmy, the doctor that you consulted
+about your hair?" The widow looked the picture of guilelessness as
+she asked the question.</p>
+<p>Miss Whedell turned slightly red in parts of her face that were
+not red before, and involuntarily raised her hands to two heavy
+braids of hair which fronted each ear, and adjusted them. Then she
+said, sarcastically:</p>
+<p>"Mr. Maltboy must feel much flattered at being compared with a
+notorious quack."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Frump, with a laugh spreading all over her gentle face,
+replied:</p>
+<p>"Oh! of course you call him a quack, because he could not save
+your--"</p>
+<p>"You are rude, madam," said Miss Whedell, with emotion.</p>
+<p>"And you are silly, miss," retorted Mrs. Frump, still smiling,
+"to take offence at nothing."</p>
+<p>"You ought to be ashamed of yourself, madam."</p>
+<p>Greatly to the relief of the three callers, who were seized with
+a desire to laugh aloud during this short, snapping dialogue, a
+bell rang, and a new figure entered upon the scene. The two ladies
+rose about three inches, and greeted him as Mr. Chiffield. Mr.
+Chiffield bowed stiffly, smiled mechanically, and cast a sweeping
+glance at the three men present. This glance, and the looks with
+which it was met, called up a singular train of associations.</p>
+<p>Maltboy remembered the new comer as a fellow who had trod on his
+corns getting into an Amity street stage. Overtop remembered him as
+an eccentric individual, who always carried, without the slightest
+reference to existing weather, an umbrella under his arm, with the
+point rearward, and held at just the angle to pierce the eye of a
+person walking incautiously after him. Overtop had frequently felt
+a strong inclination to pull the umbrella out from behind, and ask
+the bearer to carry it in a less threatening manner.</p>
+<p>Mr. Chiffield, on the other hand, readily recalled Matthew
+Maltboy as a suspicious person whom he had seen hanging around an
+up-town hotel, about a year and a half before (when Maltboy was
+paying his ineffectual addresses to a cruel Cuban beauty who passed
+the summer months at that house). Mr. Chiffield had always supposed
+him to be a confidence man of superior abilities.</p>
+<p>Of Overtop, Mr. Chiffield was vaguely reminiscent. Unless he was
+mistaken, that person was the one who wore an entire suit of pepper
+and salt, including a felt hat, necktie, and gaiters, two summers
+before.</p>
+<p>Mr. Quigg was a novelty in Mr. Chiffield's eyes; but Mr.
+Chiffield was well known by sight to Mr. Quigg, who also remembered
+to have heard that he was a partner in the great drygoods house of
+Upjack, Chiffield &amp; Co.</p>
+<p>Mr. Chiffield was about forty years of age, and had a bald head,
+a square, heavy face, scanty whiskers, small, shrewd eyes, and a
+bilious complexion. He dressed in profound black, wore his necktie
+negligently, exhibited neither ring nor breastpin nor gold chain,
+spoke as if he were always thinking inwardly of his private
+business, and never laughed. These peculiarities indicated, beyond
+any doubt, that Mr. Chiffield was a wealthy man; though it might be
+difficult to trace the exact processes of reasoning by which this
+conclusion was reached. Any unprejudiced stranger, seeing Mr.
+Chiffield, and being told that he was a partner in a large drygoods
+house, would instantly think, "That drygoods house will stand in
+the midst of fires, earthquakes, and financial revulsions."</p>
+<p>With that fine instinct peculiar to lovers, Matthew Maltboy
+immediately recognized in Mr. Chiffield a rival--and a dangerous
+one. Having seen much of society, Maltboy was well aware that Mr.
+Chiffield's mature age, his grim appearance, his sparse whiskers,
+and even the bald spot on the top of his head, were eminent
+advantages with which youth and bloom, and a full head of hair
+could not cope--unless with the aid of that fascination which
+Matthew flattered himself that he possessed, and which, he thought,
+he had used to some purpose during his hurried conversation with
+his twentieth enslaver, Miss Whedell. The usages of New Year's day,
+as well as frequent impatient nods from Quigg, and suggestive
+coughs from Overtop, would not permit of his staying longer. He
+therefore, rose to take his leave, his fellow pilgrims doing
+likewise, when Miss Whedell remarked that they were in a great
+hurry, and regretted that they could not remain a few minutes
+more.</p>
+<p>The captivated Maltboy toyed, with his hat in an uncertain way,
+and was half disposed to sit down again, when Quigg hastily
+produced his visiting list, and said, with his best business
+smile:</p>
+<p>"We Should certainly be very happy, Miss Whedell; but we have
+seventy-five calls still to make, and it is now (consulting his
+watch) two o'clock."'</p>
+<p>As the three visitors withdrew (declining, at every step, a
+pressing invitation to taste the refreshments which were piled in
+mountainous form on a table in an adjoining alcove), Maltboy
+exchanged a look of deep, sentimental meaning with Miss Whedell,
+who rose at least six inches from her chair, and followed it with a
+slight hostile glare at Mr. Chiffield, upon whose equable face it
+fell harmless. Overtop bowed coldly to everybody, as if he were
+disappointed in the human species; and Quigg gave a parting grin at
+the room in general, and at nobody or nothing in particular,</p>
+<p>"We're all right, Top," whispered Maltboy, as they descended the
+steps to the sidewalk. "She smiled slightly when I mentioned having
+seen her from our back parlor window. I have obtained permission to
+call again."</p>
+<p>"You'll have to do it without me, my dear fellow," returned
+Overtop, tossing back his head from force of habit, the offensive
+cowlick being then suppressed by his hat. "Nothing on earth could
+induce me to speak to that dull widow again."</p>
+<p>"She doesn't live there," said Quigg. "She is some connection, I
+believe, of the queer old Dutchman that I spoke of, and is probably
+only helping Miss Whedell to receive callers. I should think, from
+the way they abuse each other, that they were old and dear
+friends."</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="A_CHAPTER_IX."></a>CHAPTER IX.</h2>
+<h3>MRS. SLAPMAN AT HOME.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Full of new and pleasant thoughts, Marcus Wilkeson walked on
+toward the half-antique house which contained the strange old
+gentleman. Just as he was about to swing back the iron gate of the
+front yard, he saw, at a distance, the two friends of his bosom and
+Mr. Quigg descending a flight of steps to the sidewalk. They saw
+him at the same time; and both Overtop and Maltboy violently
+beckoned him to approach. Mr. Quigg added his solicitations in a
+calmer and more dignified manner, moving his arm like an automaton
+three times from the elbow. Even the driver, Captain Tonkins, in
+the spirit of invitation peculiar to his mental state, steadied
+himself on the seat, poked his right arm and his long whip toward
+Marcus, and said: "Hu-hullo there--come along?" Having done this,
+Captain Tonkins furtively poured a gill of brandy into the tin cup,
+and drank it under cover of the buffalo robe.</p>
+<p>In compliance with this general request, Marcus forbore to open
+the gate of the old gentleman's house, and joined his friends.</p>
+<p>"How many people have you called on, you old humbug?" asked
+Overtop, as Marcus drew near.</p>
+<p>Marcus was on the point of alluding to the chance acquaintances
+that he had made that morning; but a moment's reflection stopped
+him.</p>
+<p>"I told you," said he, "that my only visit was to be to our odd
+old neighbor. I was at his gate, when you called. And now, what do
+you want?"</p>
+<p>"I want to tell you," said Matthew Maltboy, "that Miss
+Whedell--the Juno-like young lady with the handkerchief, you
+know--is--"</p>
+<p>"All your fancy painted her," interrupted Marcus.</p>
+<p>"She's lovely--she's divine," said Maltboy, rapturously
+finishing the quotation. "I have made an impression. Congratulate
+me, old boy!"</p>
+<p>"I do," said Marcus, laughing, "and only hope that you will find
+it as easy getting out of the scrape as into it. And what have you
+discovered, Top?"</p>
+<p>"That there isn't a sensible woman or an original idea, so far,
+on the block. I wouldn't budge an inch farther, but for Quigg's
+promise to introduce me to a young widow who lives next door--a
+regular prodigy of science and art, according to his story. I think
+you said she was a widow, Quigg?"</p>
+<p>"I suppose so," said Quigg, "as I never saw nor heard of her
+husband; and she's lived on this block five years last May."</p>
+<p>The three besieged Marcus to lay aside his scruples for once,
+and join them in visiting this accomplished lady. Marcus fought
+them until his patience was exhausted, and then gave in.</p>
+<p>The door to which they climbed, bore, on a large and shining
+plate, the name "Slapman." This door was opened to them by a tall
+negro in livery, which, like the wearer, had a borrowed appearance.
+As they entered, they saw a little wiry man, with a pale face full
+of wrinkles and crowsfeet, bounding up the first flight of stairs,
+two steps at a time. When the little man reached the first landing
+he looked back, and directed a strange, suspicious glance at the
+callers.</p>
+<p>The opening of the parlor door discovered a room full of men,
+who were sipping wine, eating cold fowl and confections, talking
+and laughing loudly with each other, or exchanging repartees with a
+lady who stood in the centre of the apartment and shed her light
+upon all. This lady was Mrs. Grazella Jigbee Slapman.</p>
+<p>Previous to her marriage, she had been not altogether unknown to
+the corners of several weekly newspapers, under the name of
+"Grazella." She had also cultivated a natural talent for painting,
+so assiduously, that a little cabinet piece of hers, representing a
+cat, a lobster, and a plate of fruit, was considered good enough to
+exhibit in the window of a Broadway print shop, in which her uncle
+was a silent partner, and was approvingly paragraphed in a paper
+partly owned by her first cousin. To gifts capable of producing
+results like these, she added a great aptitude for music; although
+an incurable indolence, she gracefully said, had always prevented
+her from learning the piano. While yet sustaining the name of
+Jigbee, she had achieved a high reputation in private circles as a
+merciless judge of music. But her conversation had been, from
+earliest girlhood, her chief attraction. She possessed the
+extraordinary faculty of talking with a dozen persons upon a dozen
+different subjects at the same time.</p>
+<p>Unlike many people similarly endowed, she did not exercise this
+wonderful gift for the brutal purpose of putting down feebler
+intellects, but only to elicit TRUTH, which she often declared to
+be the sole object of her existence. When, by her alliance with Mr.
+Slapman, a thrifty speculator in real estate, she was installed as
+mistress of a fine house and furniture, and a few thousand a year,
+the lady naturally gathered about her a still larger circle of
+admirers. Her researches for TRUTH were met halfway by people that
+were supposed to deal in that article, abstractly considered; such
+as poets, painters, sculptors, reformers, inventors. Anybody with a
+new idea was sure to be understood and encouraged by her. Her
+fondness for new ideas was as keen as an entomologist's for new
+bugs or butterflies.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Slapman had not made the mistake of neglecting her physical
+and perishable charms in deference to her intellectual and immortal
+nature. She was twenty-four years old, and had clear, sparkling
+eyes, a fresh complexion, good teeth, rich, heavy hair, and a
+substantial figure. The pursuit of TRUTH did not disagree with her
+health.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Slapman bustled out of the little knot of persons about
+her, and advanced in a frank, hearty way to meet her visitors. To
+Mr. Quigg she nodded patronizingly, as to one whom she had long
+known to be guiltless of new ideas; but to the strangers who sought
+her society, she addressed a cordial smile.</p>
+<p>Mr. Quigg, having performed his office, judiciously stepped
+aside, and left the honors and burdens of conversation with the
+three friends.</p>
+<p>Matthew Maltboy, with the rashness of youth, opened the verbal
+engagement, by remarking that it was a fine day.</p>
+<p>This wretched conventionalism was met by a "Very," so obviously
+sarcastic, that Marcus Wilkeson decided not to utter a remark which
+was at that moment on his lips.</p>
+<p>At this embarrassing juncture, Fayette Overtop came to the
+rescue. "As we alighted from our sleigh, Mrs. Slapman, I noticed
+how firmly the snow at the edge of the street was pressed down by
+the feet of the hundreds who have called on you; and I could not
+but think how truly that white surface, upon which the prints of so
+many boots were beautifully blended, typified the purity of the
+motives which brought the owners of those boots to your door."</p>
+<p>"A most original and charming remark!" said Mrs. Slapman. "I
+must repeat it to Chickson. The author of 'A Snowflake's Lament'
+will appreciate that felicitous observation. You have heard of
+Chickson?"</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop read new books, magazines, literary papers, in
+considerable quantities, but did not remember to have ever met with
+the name. Speaking upon impulse, and to avoid explanation, however,
+he said:</p>
+<p>"Oh, yes--certainly, but have not the pleasure of his
+acquaintance."</p>
+<p>"You should know each other," said Mrs. Slapman. "Excuse me a
+minute." She ran with girlish haste to the other end of the
+parlors, and brought back an undersized young man. When he had been
+introduced to Overtop, and shaken hands with him, the enthusiastic
+hostess quoted, somewhat imperfectly, the beautiful conceit which
+Overtop had just uttered, and remarked that it would be a capital
+subject for a poem.</p>
+<p>Mr. Chickson turned his eyes upward to the ceiling, and then
+downward to the floor, as if he were committing what he had heard
+to memory, and then said it was very curious, but he had thought of
+the same theme before, and was intending to write a poem on it next
+week.</p>
+<p>"Now, that's just like you, you provoking creature!" said Mrs.
+Slapman, tapping the poet playfully with her fan. "It's really
+selfish of you to keep all your poetical thoughts for your
+poems."</p>
+<p>Mr. Chickson smiled pleasantly, but said nothing; and when Mrs.
+Slapman's attention was momentarily attracted by a passing remark
+from another person, the poet improved the opportunity to slip away
+and take another glass of champagne in the corner.</p>
+<p>"Ah! gone, is he?" said Mrs. Slapman, remarking his
+disappearance. "Though one of the most promising of our young
+poets, he is dull enough in conversation. It may be said of him, as
+of Goldsmith, 'He writes like an angel, but talks like poor Poll.'
+You may have read his poem, 'Echoes of the Empyrean,' published in
+the <i>Weekly Lotus</i>."</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop was wicked enough to say that he had read and
+admired it.</p>
+<p>"It is a curious fact in the history of the poem, that the
+subtle thoughts which it evolves were the topic of discussion at
+one of my <i>conversazioni</i>; and on that very night Chickson
+told me he had forty-five lines written on the subject. The
+knowledge of that trifling circumstance lends additional interest
+to the poem."</p>
+<p>"That is, if anything could lend additional interest to it,"
+observed Overtop.</p>
+<p>"You are right," said Mrs. Slapman. "TRUTH, like that which
+animates every line of the 'Empyrean,' needs no factitious
+attractions. You have read the 'Empyrean?'"--turning to Wilkeson
+and Maltboy, who had stood hard by during this conversation, calm
+patterns of politeness.</p>
+<p>Mr. Wilkeson, not understanding the question (his thoughts
+wandering back to the pale mechanic and his child), nodded "Yes,"
+and was immediately put down on Mrs. Slapman's mental tablet as a
+quiet gentleman of good taste. But Matthew Maltboy, distinctly
+understanding it, was candid enough to say "No," and from that
+moment was as nothing in the eyes of the lady.</p>
+<p>Overtop proceeded to deepen the favorable impression which he
+had made upon this charming patroness of intellect.</p>
+<p>"Did it ever occur to you how many subjects for the highest
+order of poetry lie unnoticed all about us? Take that chandelier,
+for example, the prismatic drops of which are dull in the shade,
+but sparkle with all the colors of the rainbow in the gaslight.
+Might not those hidden splendors be compared to that genius whose
+brilliancy is alone evoked by Beauty's radiant smile?"</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson squirmed, and Matthew Maltboy felt uneasy, while
+their friend was delivering this elaborate idea, and felt easier
+when he reached the end in safety. Mr. Overtop himself shared in
+the sensation of relief.</p>
+<p>"Beautiful! beautiful!" cried Mrs. Slapman, in a species of
+rapture. "I must repeat that delicious thought to Chickson. But not
+now." And she looked inquiringly at Overtop, as if in expectation
+that he would utter another new TRUTH immediately. That gentleman
+not happening to have one on his tongue's end, Mrs. Slapman was
+kind enough to give him time for reflection.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="A_CHAPTER_X."></a>CHAPTER X.</h2>
+<h3>INFIRMITIES OF GENIUS.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>"Allow me to point out some of my friends, Mr. Overtop. Among
+them are faces which you may have seen. If not, you will at least
+recognize several of the names."</p>
+<p>"But I must protest that I am monopolizing too much of your
+time, madam," interposed Overtop, conscious that his neglected
+friends were looking on awkwardly, and waiting for him.</p>
+<p>"And I protest against your protesting," said Mrs. Slapman, with
+a merry laugh. So saying, she motioned him to one of the front
+windows, and, under the shade of heavy blue and gold curtains,
+commenced to point out notable guests.</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop observed, first with regret and then with pride,
+that their withdrawal into a corner elicited looks of surprise and
+curiosity, not unmingled with envy, from the little group that
+hovered about the refreshment table, and drank Mrs. Slapman's fine
+wines, and laughed and joked together. He was glad to see that his
+two friends sauntered through the parlors, examining the pictures
+and articles of taste which caught the eye on every side; and that
+Mr. Quigg was engrossed in the examination of some books on a
+centre table, opening them, and smoothing their fair pages with his
+hand as if they were ledgers.</p>
+<p>"You see that stout man with the double chin--the one drinking
+champagne, to the left of the table? That is Mr. Scrymser, a
+gentleman who has made several aeronautic excursions, and talked
+about a balloon voyage to Europe last year. You may remember his
+portrait, and plans of his air ship, in the illustrated
+papers."</p>
+<p>"I do," said Overtop; "and also that he didn't go." "Precisely.
+Some trouble about the currents, I believe. You note that small
+man, with the sharp face--the one sipping a glass, to the right of
+the table? That is Mr. Boskirk, inventor of the <i>'Submarine
+Summer House,'</i> a species of diving bell, which is to be owned
+and managed by a Joint-Stock Company. I have promised to take a few
+shares in the concern."</p>
+<p>"Excuse the digression, madam," said Overtop, "but ought not
+these two gentlemen to change places in life? Is not the heavy one
+peculiarly adapted to the diving bell, and the light one to the
+balloon?"</p>
+<p>Mrs. Slapman smiled, and looked faintly surprised, as if the
+remark were unworthy of her guest. "Probably you know that
+gentleman under the picture of a landscape, talking very earnestly
+to another gentleman, who seems to want to be getting away."</p>
+<p>"The man with the long, curly, red hair? I know his face well,
+and, though I have no further knowledge of him, am morally certain
+that he is a social reformer."</p>
+<p>"Why?" asked Mrs. Slapman.</p>
+<p>"Because I never saw a man with long, curly, red hair, who was
+not a social reformer. Men with red hair--the true carrot tint, I
+mean--have a natural propensity for reform. Some of them repress
+it, but others give rein to their inclinations, go into the reform
+business, and hang out their curls as a sign to all mankind. And
+all mankind interpret it as readily as they do the striped pole in
+front of a barber's shop."</p>
+<p>"A striking thought, truly, and full of TRUTH," said Mrs.
+Slapman. "I will mention it to Mr. Gormit. On reflection, however,
+I won't. I might wound his feelings, for he is an exquisitely
+sensitive creature. As you have ingeniously discovered, he
+<i>is</i> a social reformer. At present he is only known to the
+public as the editor of the 'Humanitarian Harbinger;' but his
+select circle of friends are well aware that he is devoting his
+ripened genius to the production of a work called the
+'Progressional Principia,' which will be in four volumes, and
+exhaust the whole subject of social science. This immense
+undertaking is a favorite subject of his ordinary conversation. He
+is probably, at this very moment, giving a general outline of the
+book to that gentleman on his right.</p>
+<p>"That slender young man with the Vandyke beard, cutting into a
+cake, you may not need to be told, is Patching, the painter of
+those delicious interiors which have been seen every year by those
+who had eyes to find them, in obscure corners at the rooms of the
+National Academy of Design. In short, Patching is the subject of a
+conspiracy in which the Hanging Committee is implicated. But though
+professional envy may place his works in the worst possible light,
+and for some time cast a shadow over his prospects, an independent
+public taste will ultimately appreciate his genius. Mark the
+melancholy that overspreads his features, as he tastes that glass
+of sherry. Next to TRUTH, melancholy is the chief characteristic of
+his style. In a miniature portrait which he painted of me, last
+year, and which is regarded as a capital likeness, he introduced a
+shade of sadness, which is, at least, not habitual with me."</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop hastened to say, that of <i>that</i> fact he needed
+no assurance.</p>
+<p>"Without giving a minute account of all my guests, I may say
+generally, that they include novelists, dramatists, actors, and
+musicians. Some you may know by sight. The acquaintance of all you
+may make at a future time."</p>
+<p>At this strong hint, Mr. Overtop replied, that he should be only
+too happy. He had by this time come to the conclusion that there
+never was a more candid and delightful widow than Mrs. Slapman;
+and, furthermore, that she was that rarity--a sensible woman--of
+which he had been so long in search. Mr. Overtop mentally hugged
+himself.</p>
+<p>"By the way, sir--you will pardon the impertinence of the
+question--but to what profession do you belong?"</p>
+<p>"I am a lawyer, madam," said he, fearful that the announcement
+would not be well received. "Fayette Overtop, firm of Overtop &amp;
+Maltboy."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Slapman mused a moment, and said:</p>
+<p>"It is a little singular, that, among my large collection--I
+mean circle--of friends, there shouldn't be a single lawyer."</p>
+<p>"As I am a <i>single</i> lawyer, Mrs. Slapman, it is within my
+power to supply that deficiency among those who are honored with
+your friendship." Mr. Overtop thought, with some reason, as he
+finished this remark, that he had never said a better thing in his
+life.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Slapman's severe taste rejected Overtop's pun, but not
+himself, and she was about to say that she should put him on the
+list for her next <i>conversazione</i>, when another awkward
+interruption occurred, in this wise:</p>
+<p>Signor Mancussi was a gentleman with an Italian name and a
+perfect knowledge of English, who sang bass parts in a church up
+town, and enjoyed the reputation of having personated the chief
+Druid in Norma, at an early period of the New York opera. M. Bartin
+played one of numerous violins at the Academy of Music, and was
+believed to be kept down only by a powerful combination. Three
+months before this New Year's day, both of these gentlemen had
+volunteered their services, in company with many other musical
+people, to give a grand concert in aid of a benevolent enterprise.
+To M. Bartin, as a man supposed to know something of sharp
+management, from his connection with the opera, was intrusted the
+supreme control of the whole affair. It is due to M. Bartin to say,
+that he tried to perform his laborious duties faithfully and with
+perfect justice to his associates.</p>
+<p>When, therefore, in ordering the printing of the gigantic
+posters which heralded the concert, he directed his own name to be
+placed at the head of the "eminent artists who had offered their
+services for the occasion," and in type half as large again as any
+of the rest, he only expressed a conscientious opinion of his
+superiority over all of them. In this opinion his associates
+happened to disagree with him, each one claiming that himself, and
+nobody else, was entitled to typographical precedence.</p>
+<p>Most keenly was the alleged injustice felt by Signer Mancussi,
+who stood at the foot of the sloping list in letters less than an
+inch long; and he had made a solemn vow to revenge himself on M.
+Bartin the first time that they met after the concert. Their
+simultaneous appearance at Mrs. Slapman's was that time. M. Bartin
+had been privately informed of the Signer's intentions, and
+regretted that that gentleman's ridiculous vanity should get the
+better of his judgment. Seeing him at Mrs. Slapman's, M. Bartin
+avoided the Signer's presence, fearing they might come into a
+collision disgraceful to the time and the place. The Signer, for
+the same considerate reasons, kept shy of M. Bartin. After dodging
+each other for a long time, they were at last brought, by accident,
+face to face. M. Bartin was calm. Signor Mancussi tried to be
+tranquil, but those small, lean black letters at the foot of the
+list rose vividly to his mind; and, before he could check himself,
+he had whispered, or hissed, between his set teeth, the word,</p>
+<p>"SCOUNDREL!"</p>
+<p>M. Bartin was taken unawares, but had sufficient presence of
+mind to reply, "You're another," in a whisper, low, but freighted
+with meaning.</p>
+<p>Whereupon the Signor responded, also under his breath, "You're
+no gentleman." To this assertion, M. Bartin answered, with masterly
+irony, "And you <i>are</i> a gentleman, now, a'n't you?"</p>
+<p>Up to this point the controversy had been pleasantly conducted
+in whispers, and was unnoticed by the bystanders; but M. Bartin's
+last insinuation had the strange effect of maddening the Signor
+still more. He lost his self-control, and said, in an audible
+voice:</p>
+<p>"You're only a scraper of catgut, anyhow."</p>
+<p>M. Bartin, also oblivious of the proprieties, retorted, louder
+still:</p>
+<p>"And what are you but an infernal screech owl?"</p>
+<p>Cries of "Hallo!" "What's the row?" "Hush!" and "For shame!"
+rose from all parts of the room, and the two musical gentlemen,
+conscious that they had grossly misconducted themselves, stepped
+back a yard from each other, and were immediately surrounded by
+several friends, and kindly told that they were a pair of
+fools.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Slapman and Overtop rushed to the spot. The latter measured
+the two combatants with his eye, to see if he could safely
+undertake to pitch both, or either of them, out of the room, if
+requested so to do by the widow, and concluded that he could
+not.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Slapman was much embarrassed by this painful outbreak. It
+was only three weeks ago that M. Bartin had dedicated a new
+quadrille to her; and but a fortnight since Signor Mancussi had
+sung four operatic airs gratuitously at one of her musical and
+dramatic <i>soir&eacute;es</i>. But respect for herself and for her
+guests--especially for Mr. Overtop, of whose talents she had formed
+an exalted opinion--pointed out her path of duty, and she followed
+it. She stepped between the two disputants, and cast a look of
+surprise and regret at each.</p>
+<p>"I was hasty," said Signor Mancussi.</p>
+<p>"And I was too impulsive," said M. Bartin.</p>
+<p>"Then, gentlemen, if you would merit my continued friendship,
+please make up your little difference, by shaking hands."</p>
+<p>They recoiled from the proposition a moment, but, being pushed
+together by their respective friends from behind, took each other's
+right hand, shook it once feebly, and said distinctly, with their
+eyes, "We shall meet again!"</p>
+<p>"Very well done," said Mrs. Slapman, with the air of an empress,
+tempered by a charming smile. "And let us hope that is the end of
+it. Now, Mr. Overtop, allow me to offer you some refreshment."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Slapman was in the act of handing a glass of champagne to
+the favored Overtop, when an unearthly shriek was heard, which
+startled the steadiest nerves. This shriek was repeated three times
+in quick succession, and seemed to come from the sidewalk in front
+of the house. There was a general rush to the window; but Wilkeson,
+Overtop, Maltboy, and Quigg ran for the street at once, surmising
+the source of the cry.</p>
+<p>There stood Captain Tonkins, in the sleigh, leaning against the
+dashboard, holding in one hand an empty jug, and in the other his
+whip. Around the sleigh were a dozen men and boys, who had been
+convoked by the cry of "FELL' CITIZENS!" More men and more boys
+were seen coming in the distance.</p>
+<p>As the four lessees of the sleigh approached him, the Captain
+again yelled, "FELL' CITIZENS!"</p>
+<p>"For heaven's sake, stop, Captain!" cried Quigg.</p>
+<p>A smile of contempt played upon the Captain's large lips, as,
+shaking his whip defiantly at the agitated group, he shouted:</p>
+<p>"I--I know ye. Don' think I doknowye. You're Mulcahy men, ev'
+moth's sonofye; and you've come to this 'ere meet'n' to put down
+free-ee-dom of speech. But yer carndoit. 'Peat it, yer ca-arn-doit.
+I d'fy ye. I d'fy ye."</p>
+<p>The Captain was a powerful man; and Quigg, as well as his
+companions, singly and collectively, shrank from trying physical
+persuasion on him. Besides, a crowd of people had gathered, who
+were greatly enjoying the scene, and desiring its continuance for
+an indefinite period.</p>
+<p>"FELL' CITIZENS!" continued the Captain, "now these vile tools
+o' Mulca-a-hy silenced, warntellye I'm can'date School 'Spector in
+this ward. Fuss place, I'm only reg'l can'date. Secun' place, I
+feel great int'st mor'l wants of all your chi-i-ld'n, Masay they
+are my own child'n, Go'bless'em. Third place, my dear FELL'
+CIT'Z'NS, if yer'll jess step in ter Phil Rooney's 'fore ye vote,
+yer'll find some whi-i-sky there; and that--that's bess arg'ment,
+after all."</p>
+<p>Having reached the logical end of the first and last speech ever
+made in public by Captain Tonkins, the Captain tumbled out of his
+sleigh, and sprawled upon the snow; whereat the bystanders shouted
+for joy, and the widow Slapman and two large windows full of guests
+shook with laughter.</p>
+<p>"'S pla-at-form fall'n'?" asked the Captain.</p>
+<p>"Yes," replied one of the citizens, humoring the idea; "the
+platform gave way, and you tumbled to the ground."</p>
+<p>"I--I'no' who di't," resumed the Captain. "Them Mulca'men. They
+saw-awed posts." Here the Captain descried two widow Slapmans
+smiling on him from a window, and gallantly kissed his hand at
+them.</p>
+<p>His heavy body was tumbled into the rear of the sleigh, a
+buffalo robe thrown over it, and Captain Tonkins was then
+unconsciously borne toward the bosom of his family, in Minetta lane
+(a friend officiating as driver), amid the cheers of his late
+audience.</p>
+<p>The three bachelors were satiated with their day's experiences.
+They raised their hats to Mrs. Slapman, still laughing at the
+window, and walked smartly home. Mr. Quigg, deriving much comfort
+from the thought that Captain Tonkins had not been paid for his
+sleigh, and would not be, hastened to a neighboring stable, hired
+the only remaining team, and continued his round of calls, giving
+one minute to each.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_SECOND."></a>BOOK SECOND.</h2>
+<h3>POLISHING.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="B_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>THE ENIGMA.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson's new acquaintance throve rapidly. Mr. Minford's
+dealings with the world had made him shy and suspicious, and he was
+at first disposed to keep his benevolent visitor at a safe business
+distance. But the heart of the thoughtful mechanic could not long
+resist the kind and earnest sympathy of the man who sought to be
+his friend.</p>
+<p>With a caution born of experience, however, Mr. Minford, before
+admitting the new guest to his full confidence, called upon a
+number of Wall street brokers and South street merchants, to whom
+Marcus had referred him, and learned from them that that gentleman
+bore a reputation of the rarest honor and purity of character.
+While giving this united testimony, however, they all agreed in
+condemning Mr. Wilkeson's eccentricity--insanity, one broker called
+it--in retiring from business at the very moment when he was most
+successful, and had a great fortune within easy reach. The fact
+that he had retired with one hundred and fifty thousand dollars,
+instead of mitigating his offence in the eyes of those critics,
+increased it. "Why," said a noted bear, "with that amount of
+capital, and Wilkeson's first-rate talents--when he chose to use
+them--he might have become the king of Wall street. It's a pity so
+smart a fellow should make a wreck of himself." And the bear heaved
+a sigh of commiseration; which was by no means echoed by Mr.
+Minford, who gathered, from all this evidence, an increased esteem
+for his benefactor.</p>
+<p>From the time when he first crossed the threshold of the house
+on his mission of mercy, Pet had looked upon him with the deepest
+reverence. She had read, in story books, of mysterious gentlemen
+who went about doing good merely for the pleasure of it, and who
+always reached the scene of distress with fairy-like certainty,
+when everybody and everything would have gone to ruin without them.
+Such a strange, supernatural embodiment of goodness seemed Marcus
+Wilkeson to her childish fancy. When he entered the room--and he
+was an every-day caller now--she looked around with great anxiety
+to see that all the chairs were in their proper places; that there
+was no dirt or dust visible anywhere; that everything was in a
+state of order and cleanliness worthy so exalted a guest.</p>
+<p>She would run to take his overcoat and hat and cane, and place
+them as carefully in the clothes press as if they had been the
+robe, crown, and sceptre of a king. Then she would sit in her
+little chair, and take her sewing, or knitting, or embroidery, and
+pretend to be all absorbed in it, while she was listening eagerly
+to every word that Marcus addressed to her father, and occasionally
+looked up at the face of their guest, and thought how noble it was,
+and how proud she should be to call him uncle.</p>
+<p>When he spoke to her, as he often did, and asked her about her
+work, or her companions, or her studies (upon the latter subject he
+had grown quite curious, of late), she would feel that she was
+blushing, and answer, with downcast eyes, and be half glad and half
+sorry when he ceased to question her, and would then sit and
+torment herself by recalling what she had said, and thinking how
+much it might have been improved.</p>
+<p>A sharp-eyed observer, had such been present, accustomed to
+studying the human face and weighing motives, would have been
+puzzled to guess the exact nature of the feelings which Marcus
+entertained for the pretty, innocent young creature who sat there,
+always plying her little fingers at some useful work. The puzzle
+would have been a still greater one for Mr. Wilkeson himself. He
+felt a profound interest in Pet; and she it was, and not the pale
+mechanic or his novel machine, that led him daily up those three
+flights of rickety stairs to that humble room. He said to himself,
+and he would have said to anybody who was entitled to call upon him
+for an explanation, that he had always loved children, and that the
+beauty and goodness of this child had deeply interested him. If
+there was any other motive at the bottom of his heart, he
+studiously concealed it from himself, as he would have concealed it
+from all the world.</p>
+<p>During these visits, Mr. Minford pursued his work without
+interruption. The screens, which were at first jealously closed,
+were now thrown open, and the inventor sat there in full sight of
+his visitor, laboring at his great mechanical problem. Repeatedly
+he had begged of Marcus the privilege of explaining to him the
+principles of the machine; but that gentleman had always resolutely
+declined, for the reasons before stated. And he had always observed
+that, a few moments after such refusal, the face of the inventor
+would brighten up, as if with joy that he had not parted with his
+secret even to one who held a fifth interest in it.</p>
+<p>Of the wonderful results which the machine was sure to
+accomplish, Mr. Minford was never tired of talking, nor Mr.
+Wilkeson of hearing, although, at these times, his eyes followed
+the flying motions of Pet's fingers, as if they were a part of the
+wonder of which the inventor discoursed so glowingly.</p>
+<p>Precisely what the machine was to effect, when completed, Marcus
+Wilkeson would never have known, if he had been the most attentive
+of listeners. Mr. Minford spoke in vague, general terms, that
+afforded no clue to the mystery. He talked of old philosophers and
+mechanicians, who had failed to discover an unnamed secret of
+Nature, because they had no faith in its existence. Complete faith
+in the existence of the thing to be discovered, as well as in the
+ability of the searcher to find it, he regarded as indispensable
+conditions of an inventor's success.</p>
+<p>The fact that the natural law which he was trying to demonstrate
+had been pronounced an impossibility by professors of science,
+should weigh as nothing in the mind of any man who remembered how
+every great invention of the age had in turn been stamped
+"impossible" by those dogmatizers in their academical chairs, their
+books, and their reviews. Latterly (Mr. Minford confessed), the
+scientific theorists had been more tolerant toward other people's
+inventions (they never invent anything themselves); but with regard
+to the one upon which he was now engaged, they had, with complete
+unanimity, decided that the thing could not be done, and charitably
+called every man an idiot or a lunatic who attempted to do it.</p>
+<p>"The world has at last fallen into this belief," Mr. Minford
+would say, bitterly, "and the few people with whom I am acquainted
+would all agree in echoing these scientific opinions, if they knew
+what I am working at. But no one shall know--excepting you, Mr.
+Wilkeson, to whom I should be most happy to explain everything, if
+you would only let me. This prejudice is too deep rooted to be
+readily pulled up. Even when my invention is perfected, and has
+entered upon its boundless career of usefulness, I know that it
+will be called a humbug; that people will look at it, and see it in
+operation, and still say it is a lie. Yet the time will come when
+the professors of science will feel proud to expound, by formulas,
+the very invention which they have shown, by formulas, to be an
+absolute contradiction of all the laws of Nature. As for the rabble
+who make up the world (the inventor's lips curled as he said this),
+they will be glad to atone for the mad hue-and-cry with which they
+will follow me at first, by giving me, at last, limitless wealth
+and immortal fame."</p>
+<p>Mr. Minford's eyes flashed; and Marcus Wilkeson, looking up at
+them from Pet's volant fingers, saw in their sudden glare what he
+took to be the evidence of genius; but what, in an ordinary man, he
+would have called a decided symptom of insanity.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="B_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>A DELICATE PROPOSITION.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>One afternoon--when Mr. Minford was in excellent humor, having
+made a great discovery in the course of his experiments the
+previous night--Marcus thought it a good opportunity to propose
+something that had been on his mind for a week past.</p>
+<p>"Mr. Minford," he said, "will you excuse me for meddling a
+little in your household affairs?"</p>
+<p>"Not if you offer me any more kindness," returned the inventor,
+smiling gratefully at his guest. "I am too much in your debt
+already."</p>
+<p>"But you forget that I hold an interest in your invention, which
+you would make me take. I consider that more than payment in
+full."</p>
+<p>"So you have confidence in my success?"</p>
+<p>"You have begun to inspire me with it, I confess," replied
+Marcus, indulging in a little unavoidable flattery. "But--but it
+was not to <i>you</i> that I was about to offer any kindness," he
+continued, emphasizing the personal pronoun, and looking hard at
+Pet, who bent patiently over her work, and began to blush in
+anticipation that her name would be mentioned, Mr. Minford raised
+his eyes from a ratchet which he was finishing in a vice, and
+glanced with curiosity at the speaker.</p>
+<p>"Do you not think, sir, that your daughter might profitably
+spare a few hours every day toward the completion of her education?
+You have told me that her studies were interrupted by a change in
+your circumstances, some years ago."</p>
+<p>"Certainly she might," answered the inventor, "and I thank you
+for the suggestion. This machine has so completely engaged my
+thoughts, that I had quite lost sight of the dear girl's education.
+I should say, however, that I have been expecting at any moment to
+put the finishing touch on my invention, the very first profits of
+which I shall spend in employing a dozen teachers, if need be, for
+my little Pet. She shall be an educated lady, if money can make her
+so. Sha'n't you, Pet?"</p>
+<p>The young girl's fingers twinkled faster at her work. "I hope
+so, father," said she.</p>
+<p>"But, Mr. Minford, it is possible--barely possible, you
+know--that your invention may not be completed, nor money be
+realized from it, for many months; perhaps one or two years.
+Suppose--only suppose, of course--your triumph to be postponed for
+even one year; your daughter will then be one year older, and less
+fitted to acquire the accomplishments which you desire her to
+possess, than she now is. Pardon the suggestion, if it is an
+obtrusive one. I plead the sincere interest which I take in you and
+her as my only excuse."</p>
+<p>"No apology is needed, my dear sir," replied the inventor "I
+know and appreciate your thoughtful kindness toward us; and I
+consider your advice most excellent, especially as I intend to
+travel in Europe, and take out patents for my invention there. It
+would be desirable to have my Pet learn French, and also to improve
+her knowledge of music. You understand the English branches pretty
+well, I believe, my dear. Let me see--how long is it since you left
+school?"</p>
+<p>"Three years, pa."</p>
+<p>"True! true!" said the inventor, sadly. "It was when our
+troubles first began, and I found it necessary to economize. But I
+did very wrong to take you from school at that time."</p>
+<p>"You forget, pa," replied his daughter, in a sweet, chiding
+voice. "You wanted me to go on with my studies, but I said that you
+must save the tuition money, and let me learn to keep house. Don't
+you remember, pa?"</p>
+<p>"Yes, child; I remember. And I was selfish enough to allow you
+to make the sacrifice. But you shall have schooling to your heart's
+content now, whether you will or not. I agree with our dear friend,
+that no time should be lost in resuming your education. I shall
+insist upon setting apart two hundred dollars for that purpose.
+Enough money will still be left to perfect my invention; and that,
+too, within a month, notwithstanding" (he added, playfully) "Mr.
+Wilkeson's discouraging remarks a moment ago."</p>
+<p>"And I shall insist upon not taking the money, pa," said Pet,
+laughing, but shaking her head, and patting her feet on the floor
+in the most decisive manner.</p>
+<p>"And I shall insist on furnishing the money," said Marcus
+Wilkeson, folding his arms, and looking very much in earnest. "Let
+us see who can be obstinate the longest."</p>
+<p>"Then <i>I</i> shall insist on your taking another fifth
+interest in the invention. Upon that point I am immovable." Mr.
+Minford folded his arms likewise, to imply that nothing could shake
+his granitic determination.</p>
+<p>"Ah, now I see some prospect of a friendly arrangement. I will
+pay five hundred dollars for another fifth, and esteem it a good
+bargain, provided your daughter consents to let one half of it be
+spent on her education. What do you say to that, Pet?"</p>
+<p>"That I thank you very much for your kind offer," said the young
+girl, whose eyes sparkled with gratitude; "but I must not accept
+it. Pa will need all the money he can get to finish his work. I
+know it."</p>
+<p>Marcus and the father exchanged pleasant looks, and the former
+said, with an ill-assumed sternness:</p>
+<p>"Then I don't advance another cent to him. I have named my
+conditions, and they must be accepted. You have no idea, Pet, what
+a tremendously obstinate fellow I am when I'm roused."</p>
+<p>Nobody could have gathered the idea from his intensely amiable
+face at that moment.</p>
+<p>"I see, my dear, that we must yield to this determined man,"
+said Mr. Minford, winking at Marcus. "We shall never have any peace
+with him until we do."</p>
+<p>"You know best, pa," returned his daughter, who shrank timidly
+from any further discussion with their guest.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson was delighted with the perfect confidence which
+father and child reposed in him. "Now that this little matter is
+happily settled," said he, "I must tell you that I have already
+taken the liberty of selecting a school for her."</p>
+<p>"How can we ever repay your goodness?" said Mr. Minford.</p>
+<p>"It is situated only two blocks away," pursued Marcus.</p>
+<p>"Capital!" cried Mr. Minford; "for then she will never be far
+from home."</p>
+<p>"And if you want me at any time, pa, you can send for me, and I
+can be here in a moment," said Pet. "It will be so delightful!"</p>
+<p>"It is a private school, and, if your daughter prefers, she can
+be taught separately from the other pupils. Miss Pillbody, the
+teacher, tells me that she can give her an hour and a half in the
+morning, before ten o'clock, and half an hour in the afternoon,
+after four o'clock."</p>
+<p>"That will suit me exactly, pa," cried Pet, clapping her hands
+with glee; "because then I can get your breakfast, dinner, and
+supper, and do all the housework, without any interruption in my
+studies."</p>
+<p>"Miss Pillbody thought the arrangement would suit you. She is a
+perfectly competent teacher of French, Italian, the English
+branches, music, drawing, the dead languages, and higher
+mathematics--quite a prodigy, I assure you, for a lady not yet
+twenty-two years old." (Marcus was addressing the father.) "I have
+been particular in my inquiries, and all who know her speak in the
+highest terms of her remarkable attainments, her ability to teach
+others, and her goodness of heart. Your daughter will like her,
+without doubt."</p>
+<p>"I know I shall," said Pet, with enthusiasm. "There are so many
+things that I will learn, pa. First, music--"</p>
+<p>"She has a fine piano, and plays splendidly," remarked the
+guest. "I heard her."</p>
+<p>"And French and Italian, to please you, pa--that is, if I can
+learn them--and everything else that the lady will teach me. I
+shall be so happy, sir."</p>
+<p>The father and the guest smiled at the zeal with which this
+young beginner proposed to grapple with the difficulties of human
+knowledge. It was fortunate for her that a long series of hard and
+injudicious teachers had not already sickened her of learning, and
+that she brought a fresh and uncorrupted taste to the work.</p>
+<p>Pet was thinking which one of her two dresses (equally faded)
+she should wear to school, and what bit of ribbon or trimming she
+could introduce in her old bonnet, to improve its general effect.
+Marcus Wilkeson was marvelling at the confidence which the inventor
+and his daughter placed in him, and at what there was about him to
+inspire it. Mr. Minford was congratulating himself on having met
+with a man so generous and sincere as this Mr. Wilkeson, and so
+entirely disinterested, too: "For," reasoned the inventor, "he
+cannot appreciate, as I do, the enormous value of my discovery, and
+does not dream that his portion of it will compensate him for his
+outlay more than a hundred times over."</p>
+<p>The silence was broken by a sound as of heavy boots trying to
+move softly on the stairs, and a subsequent modest rap at the
+door.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="B_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>AN AUXILIARY OF MODERN CIVILIZATION.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The boy Bog rapped, and entered. He was more neatly dressed than
+when Marcus saw him on the occasion of his first visit. His patched
+and threadbare coat was replaced by a neat roundabout jacket; his
+greasy, visorless cap, by a flat felt hat, of which the brim was
+symmetrically turned up; his tattered shoes by great cowhide boots.
+The boy was of that age when the human frame grows with
+vegetable-like rapidity; and he seemed to hare increased a little
+all around within three weeks.</p>
+<p>The boy looked distressingly awkward in his new articles of
+attire. Had he stolen them, he could not have appeared more guilty
+in presence of the rightful owner.</p>
+<p>"Why, Bog!" said Mr. Minford, reproachfully; "where have you
+been these three weeks? Not called to see us once!"</p>
+<p>The boy's confusion increased at this unexpected salutation, and
+he hung down his head at the threshold of the door. Mr. Minford
+partly reassured his bashful visitor, by springing forward, shaking
+him heartily by the hand, and saying, with earnestness, "My good
+lad, I am always glad to see you." Pet was also by his side in an
+instant, and warmly shaking the other hand. "You look real nice,
+Bog," said she. Mr. Wilkeson also came forward, and said, "Don't
+you remember me, Bog?" and clasped him by the right hand when the
+inventor had relinquished It.</p>
+<p>Bog bowed and scraped and blushed, and murmured "Thank you, very
+well," several times, confusedly, and at last settled down into a
+chair which was pushed under him by Pet. Having crossed his legs,
+he began to feel a little more at ease.</p>
+<p>"You've been very busy of late, haven't you, Bog?" asked Pet,
+charitably anticipating an excuse for the boy's long absence.</p>
+<p>"You'd better believe it," replied Bog, not looking at her, but
+studying the pattern of his left boot. "The day after I called here
+last, Mr. Fink he got a job to stick up bills for a new hair dye,
+all the way from here to Dunkirk, on the Erie Railroad. Well, he
+couldn't go, cos he had lots o' city posting, ye see; so he hires
+me to do it for ten dollars a week and expenses. The pay was good,
+he said, because the work was extry hard. The bills was to be
+posted on new whitewashed fences, new houses, and places generally
+where there was signs up telling people not to 'post no
+bills.'"</p>
+<p>"That was a singular direction, Bog," said Mr. Minford.</p>
+<p>"So I told Mr. Fink," replied the boy; "but he said as how them
+were the hair-dye man's orders. He said the idea was to make folks
+look at bills who wouldn't notice 'em if they was on a place all
+covered over with adv'tisements. They was to be posted up high and
+strong, so that the owner of the property couldn't tear 'em down
+easy. Mr. Fink thought the idea was a good one; but he owned it was
+a little risky."</p>
+<p>"Perhaps that is why he didn't care to do it himself," suggested
+Marcus Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>"Mebbe," said Bog; "but I didn't consider it no objection. I
+told him I was goin' to be a bill poster, and wanted to study every
+branch o' the business." At this point Bog hitched his chair
+nervously, uncrossed and recrossed his legs, as if he were
+conscious of trespassing on the patience of his auditors, and then
+went on: "Well, I hurried home, and saw that aunt didn't want for
+nothin', and then I started on my travels. I should ha' called and
+seen you, Mr. Minford," he added, casting a side glance at the
+inventor, "but I hadn't time."</p>
+<p>"No excuse necessary, my good Bog," returned Mr. Minford,
+kindly. "Business before pleasure, you know. But I am anxious to
+hear how you got along with the job."</p>
+<p>"Well, pooty hard," said Bog, emphatically, "though I made out
+to go all through the State, and stick up six thousand bills, every
+one on 'em on a new house, shop, or fence. Lemme see--I was chased
+seven times by big dogs that was set on me, shot at three
+times"</p>
+<p>"Why, poor Bog!" interrupted Pet; "you wern't hurt, I hope?"</p>
+<p>"No, Miss Minford; I wasn't hurt," answered Bog, looking her in
+the face for the first time since he entered the house, "though I
+got one through my old cap."</p>
+<p>"I'm <i>so</i> glad it was no worse, Bog."</p>
+<p>These words of sympathy from the young girl flustered the poor
+boy for a minute. Then he rallied:</p>
+<p>"Besides that, I was took up four times by the perlice, and was
+carried afore justices of the peace. When they asked what I had to
+say why I shouldn't be fined, I told 'em the whole truth about it,
+and they all laughed except one, and said it was really funny, and
+they hadn't no doubt the hair dye was a very good thing to take,
+but could tell better after they had tried some. I told 'em that
+the hair-dye man would send 'em a dozen bottles apiece. Mr. Fink
+had d'rected me to say this, if I was 'rested and brought afore a
+justice. The justices--that is, all of 'em but one--then said they
+didn't want to be hard on me; and as that was my first offence,
+they would let me go without any fine. And they did, after givin'
+me their names, and tellin' me to be sure to have the bottles sent
+on jest as soon as could be. Ye see, they were all as bald on the
+top o' their heads as punkins. But the fourth justice that I was
+took to, he wasn't bald, but had a crop o' hair like a picter; and
+when I offered to put down his name for a dozen bottles, he swore,
+and fined me five dollars for what he said was a insult to the
+dignity of justice, and five dollars for postin' up bills in places
+where it was agin the law. Mr. Fink had give me money from the
+hair-dye man to pay fines, as well as my board; so I didn't care.
+But--but I am talking too much."</p>
+<p>Bog paused, because, on taking a stealthy observation around
+him, he suddenly become conscious that his three auditors were
+listening attentively to his story.</p>
+<p>"Not at all, my dear Bog," said Mr. Minford. "I, for one, am
+curious to know how this ingenious plan of advertising, in defiance
+of the law, succeeded." Mr. Wilkeson expressed himself curious on
+the same point. Bog, thus encouraged, continued:</p>
+<p>"When I come home, after havin' stuck up six thousand bills in
+the principal towns and villages along the route, I went right to
+Mr. Fink. He shook hands with me, and ses he, 'Bog, your fortun's
+made.' 'How's that?' said I. 'Why, ses he, 'you're the greatest
+bill poster I ever heerd of. Professor Macfuddle" (that was the
+hair-dye man) "ses the money has begun to pour in to him like
+sixty, and he is buyin' up all the hair dye in the market, and
+puttin' his labils on it to supply the demand. He has given me ten
+dollars to present to you, besides the thirty for your wages.' Mr.
+Fink then give me forty dollars, and ses he, 'That a'n't all; for I
+have so much business now, I want a pardner, and I'll take you, and
+give you one third of the earnin's.' I rather guess I snapped at
+the offer; and we is goin' into pardnership to-morrer."</p>
+<p>"Success to you," said Marcus and the inventor together. They
+saw, in this illustration of his bill-posting talents, only an
+evidence of business shrewdness that deserved encouragement. The
+young girl, however, viewed it in the light of a violation of law,
+and therefore could not conscientiously approve of it. Bog noticed
+her silence, and guessed the cause.</p>
+<p>"Thank you very much," said he; "but I forgot to say I a'n't
+goin' to do any more business on the Erie plan. It a'n't right.
+Come to think it over, I was sorry I done it; and so I told Mr.
+Fink; and he sed it wasn't exackly reg'lar either, and he shouldn't
+never ask me to do it agen."</p>
+<p>"I am glad of that," said Pet, quietly.</p>
+<p>Bog's eyes were instantly turned toward her with an expression
+of pride and gratitude.</p>
+<p>"Oh! of course, it is always best to obey the laws," observed
+Mr. Minford.</p>
+<p>"And I wouldn't for a moment be thought to advise anything
+else," added Marcus Wilkeson; "though I never could help admiring
+pluck and sharpness in business affairs."</p>
+<p>"I am going to school again, Bog," said the young girl,
+hastening to change the subject of conversation.</p>
+<p>Bog looked up, surprised and pleased.</p>
+<p>"Mr. Wilkeson," said Mr. Minford, "has taken another small share
+in my invention, and pays me in advance for it. With that, Pet will
+finish her education." The inventor would have made this disclosure
+of his private affairs to no other human being but Bog; for this
+simple boy was the only person he had ever known (excepting Marcus
+Wilkeson) who had not openly ridiculed his mysterious labors.</p>
+<p>"I am very glad to hear of it, sir," said Bog, awkwardly, but
+with an air of profound respect. "How--how is the <i>ma</i>sheen,
+sir?" Bog asked the question hurriedly, as if the machine were a
+sick person, whose health he had until then forgotten to inquire
+after.</p>
+<p>"Getting on finely, Bog. Only two or three springs, a cog here,
+a ratchet here, a band at this point, and a lever up there (Mr.
+Minford touched portions of the machine rapidly), and then look out
+for a noise!"</p>
+<p>"A noise!" repeated Bog, with juvenile earnestness.</p>
+<p>"Not an explosion, my good fellow, but tremendous public
+excitement--plenty of fame, mixed with a good deal of abuse at
+first, and a <i>little</i> money, I hope." The inventor's eyes
+flashed with the fire that Bog had often seen; and when he
+emphasized the word "little," Bog knew that he meant to express the
+boundlessness of the wealth that his labors would bring to him.</p>
+<p>"I believe it," said Bog, with sincerity pictured in every
+lineament of his honest face. "I've always believed it."</p>
+<p>"So you have, my dear Bog; and your faith has often cheered me,"
+replied the inventor, patronizingly. "By the way, how's your
+aunt?"</p>
+<p>"Oh, yes; how <i>is</i> your aunt, Bog?" asked Pet. "I had quite
+forgotten her."</p>
+<p>"She's pooty well, ony them rheumatics troubles her some.
+They're workin' their way from her left arm into her head, aunt
+says. Week afore last they was in her feet, and they've ben clear
+round her and goin' back agen since then. Queer things, them
+rheumatics!"</p>
+<p>"They are very painful, Bog, you know," said Pet.</p>
+<p>"Yes; so aunt says." Bog did not add, as he might have truly
+done, "A thousand times a day."</p>
+<p>"Give her my kind regards, Bog, and say I will call and see
+her," continued Pet.</p>
+<p>"My respectful regards also," added Mr. Minford.</p>
+<p>"Thank you," said the boy; "but I guess you better not call,
+Miss Minford. Aunt's a good woman, but kind o' cur'us, you know.
+Them rheumatics has made a great change in her." Bog here referred,
+but made no verbal allusion, to a certain friendly call which Pet
+had once made upon his aunt, on which occasion that elderly lady
+had entertained her visitor with a monologue two hours long, giving
+her a complete history of the malady, from its birth in the right
+great toe, three years previous, through all its eccentric
+phenomena, to that stage of the disease which made it, as the
+venerable sufferer observed with, some pride, the "very wust case
+the doctors ever heerd of."</p>
+<p>Upon this fruitful theme, Bog's aunt could and would have
+discoursed for hours longer, but for the appearance of Bog, when
+she sought a new relief from her agonies by abusing that poor
+fellow, charging him with neglect and ingratitude, finding fault
+with the food which he brought home for her from market, and asking
+him when he was going to buy that soft armchair he had promised her
+so long. Bog laughed, and explained this outburst, by saying to
+Pet, "It's only aunt's rheumatics;" but the old lady rejected the
+explanation, and went on scolding and faultfinding with such
+increased fierceness, that Pet hastily put on her bonnet and shawl,
+and bade the rheumatic grumbler "good-by," saying (which was true)
+that her father would be anxious about her. Since then, the young
+girl had kept away from Bog's aunt.</p>
+<p>"I've bought her a nice, soft armchair lately," continued Bog;
+"but it don't do her no good. The rheumatics seem to be getting
+wusser all the time; and the thing that makes them wussest of all
+is calls. So I guess it's better for aunt you should keep away,
+Miss Minford." Bog prided himself on his tact in putting forth the
+last argument.</p>
+<p>Then the conversation turned on Pet's education; Marcus and her
+father fondly discussing what it ought to be, and Bog listening,
+and looking stealthily at the young girl, still busy at her work;
+and they all sat, happy in thoughts of the future, far into the
+twilight.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="B_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>MISS PILLBODY.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Miss Pillbody's school was unknown to the pages of the City
+Directory. It was never advertised in the newspapers, with a long
+list of "Hons." and bank presidents as unimpeachable references.
+The bright little plate on her door exhibited only "Pillbody," in
+neat script, and no hint of the existence of a school within. The
+school was select to such an extent, that not more than a dozen
+pupils were admitted to its privileges; and so private, that,
+outside of that number, its name was not known except among its
+graduates; and there were reasons why they should hesitate to
+spread its reputation abroad. If strictly classified among the
+institutions of the city, it might be termed, "A school for female
+adults in good circumstances, whose early education had been
+neglected."</p>
+<p>The idea of this school originated with Miss Pillbody; and, like
+many other valuable ideas, it was hit upon quite accidentally.</p>
+<p>Dorcas Pillbody was the only daughter of a man who had amassed a
+fortune in the oyster business, and had finally retired to a
+four-story house in Sixteenth street, near the Sixth Avenue, where
+he purposed to spend the balance of his days in the dignified
+enjoyment of his hard-earned money. To this secluded oyster dealer,
+as solitary and happy in the midst of his new grandeur as a bivalve
+in its native bed, came a plausible stockbroker, who, after a
+series of interviews, persuaded Mr. Pillbody to make a small
+investment in the "Sky Blue Ridge Pure Vein Copper Mining
+Company."</p>
+<p>The small investment unfortunately turned out well. In less than
+sixty days, the shares that he had bought at ten per cent, sold at
+seventy-five, and ultimately advanced to par. Delighted with this
+unexpected result, Mr. Pillbody determined to stake largely (he had
+been a wholesale oyster dealer, and was a man of comprehensive
+ideas). Again his venture prospered. Mr. Pillbody, intoxicated with
+success, invested his entire means in the purchase of two new mines
+in a Southern State, whose unparalleled richness was certified to
+by mineralogists of great reputation.</p>
+<p>Just as Mr. Pillbody was making arrangements to bring these
+mines before the public, his stockbroking friend, through whom he
+had effected the purchase, left for Europe, and it was then
+discovered that Mr. Pillbody's mines, if they existed at all, were
+ten feet under a swamp, on property which belonged to somebody
+else, the title deeds of which had been forged by the adroit
+operator. Mr. Pillbody could not endure his misfortune. He wrote
+notes bidding farewell to his wife and child, and commending them
+to the care of their relatives, to whom he had always been
+bountifully generous. Then he went to Staten Island by ferry, there
+took a row boat, proceeded to a celebrated oyster bed which was the
+scene of his youthful labors, and drowned himself.</p>
+<p>The widow and daughter (the latter twenty years of age, healthy,
+and finely educated) applied to the two brothers of the deceased
+for assistance, and were at once kindly received into their
+families, and sat upon sofas and ate from tables purchased with
+money (never repaid) of the late Mr. Pillbody. The two brothers,
+upon application to the proper tribunal, were appointed executors
+of the estate, and were not long in discovering that it was
+insolvent. Mother and daughter were shifted about with almost
+monthly regularity from one house to the other; and, though they
+tried to make themselves useful in every capacity except that of a
+servant, they could not disguise the conviction that their
+departure was an event a great deal more welcome than their coming.
+The widow's talent for dressmaking (she had been a milliner's
+apprentice before marriage), though of a high order, and exerted to
+the utmost, failed to please. Miss Pillbody's thorough knowledge of
+French, and the higher branches of an elegant education, as well as
+her proficiency on the piano, and her sweet, simple style of ballad
+singing, were worse than useless acquirements in her uncles'
+families.</p>
+<p>Her uncles were cold, stern, ignorant men, who had an intense
+hatred for the mere accomplishments of life. Each had two
+daughters, who, with the natural tastes of the sex, were not averse
+to the graces of education, in the abstract, but could not bear to
+see them displayed by their "stuck-up, pauper cousin," as they
+often termed that hapless young lady in private conversation. A
+kind offer, which she was imprudent enough, to make, to teach them
+all she knew, had set them against her from the first.</p>
+<p>The widow endured the cold looks and cutting words of her
+husband's relatives, and even the reproaches which they heaped upon
+his folly, with a widow's patience, and seemed content to remain a
+poor, broken-down, dependent creature. Miss Pillbody, on the
+contrary, was quick to discern and to resent, mentally, the uncivil
+treatment daily experienced by her mother and herself. Had she been
+alone in the world, she would have left those inhospitable roofs
+when the unkind hints first began to be dropped, and trusted to the
+cold charity of strangers; but she could not bear the thought of
+being separated from her mother. So she endured her wretched state
+of dependence as best she could, while she quietly sought for some
+means of employment that would yield them a living.</p>
+<p>Profiting by the lessons she had learned from her uncles, she
+did not apply to any person who had known her father and received
+favors from him in their better days. She asked no favor from any
+one--only work, at a fair price. By diligent hunting, she found
+several opportunities. She could earn four dollars a week by
+embroidering (at which she was skilful, and had taken premiums); or
+two dollars and a half for teaching French, twice a week, in a
+country seminary; or her board and washing for inducting a family
+of four little musical prodigies into all the mysteries of the
+piano. But these tempting offers would still have left her mother
+with her uncles, and she spurned them all.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="B_CHAPTER_V."></a>CHAPTER V.</h2>
+<h3>A FRIEND IN NEED.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>One day, as Miss Pillbody was riding up Broadway, in tending to
+visit a Teachers' Agency for the sixteenth time, she accidentally
+made the acquaintance of a middle-aged lady, who talked a great
+deal upon the slightest provocation, trifled sadly with grammar and
+pronunciation, and was excessively friendly and amiable. The
+diamonds in her ears and on her fingers, and her overdone and gaudy
+style of dressing, were some indication, though not a convincing
+one, that she was a woman of wealth; and Miss Pillbody made bold to
+ask her if she knew anybody who wanted a private teacher in her
+family.</p>
+<p>The lady said she did not, "unless," she added, laughing very
+loud at the humor of the suggestion, "you come into my family, and
+learn me something."</p>
+<p>The remark was unpremeditated, but, the moment it was made, the
+lady seemed to be greatly struck with its force, and immediately
+followed it up with the question, "Do you s'pose you could learn
+grammar and pronunciation, and how to talk French, to a grown-up
+woman like me?" Miss Pillbody thought the lady with the diamonds
+was joking, and laughed by way of reply. "But I am ra-ally in
+earnest," continued the lady, thoughtfully, turning three heavy
+cluster rings on her little left finger. "Ye see, my early
+eddication was rather poor, 'cos I was poor then; but my old man
+made a spec' in tobacco, last year, and now I'm pooty well off, and
+live in good s'ciety. I kinder feel the want of grammar, French,
+and a few o' them things. I like your face and your manners, and if
+you can learn me 'em, I'll give you ten dollars a week to come to
+my house one hour every day, and be my private schoolmistress.
+It'll be rather hard, I s'pose, to learn an old dog new tricks; but
+there is no harm a-tryin'."</p>
+<p>Notwithstanding the oddity of the proposition, Miss Pillbody saw
+by the lady's face that she meant what she said. "I think I
+understand English grammar, and French, and the other branches
+usually taught at academies," she replied, "and should be very
+happy to accept your offer."</p>
+<p>"Then consider the bargain closed," returned the lady. "Here is
+my 'dress" (handing her a card), "and you may come to-morrer
+mornin', at ten o'clock, if that'll suit you. I have no children,
+and the old man will be out at that time, and we shall be as snug
+as two bugs in a rug, ye see."</p>
+<p>Miss Pillbody was delighted with the sudden prospect of an
+honest living thus opened to her, and she only feared that she
+would not be able to do enough for her money. So, after she had
+again thanked the lady for her kindness, she said:</p>
+<p>"I think I could give you lessons on the piano, madam--unless
+you understand that instrument better than I do."</p>
+<p>"Lor' bless me, child!" responded the lady, holding up her
+thick, red hands, and making the diamonds flash in the sunlight;
+"Lor' bless me! them fingers is too stiff to play the pianner now.
+I've got a splendid pianner, though, with an oleon 'tachment, three
+pedals, and pearl keys--cost eight hundred dollar; and a nice piece
+of furniture it is, you may believe. I let it be out of tune all
+the time. That's an excuse for not playing when anybody asks me to,
+ye know. I don't mind tellin' you this, because you'll be sure to
+find it out." And the lady laughed very loudly at the confession of
+this small deceit, which Miss Pillbody assured her was by no means
+confined to herself, but had been adopted by her ingenious sex from
+time immemorial.</p>
+<p>When the middle-aged pupil and her young teacher separated, as
+they did on the arrival of the stage at an up-town jeweller's,
+where the former got out to make a few purchases, Miss Pillbody
+felt as if she had known her patroness for years, and that, in that
+coarse, showy, good-hearted woman, she had found a true friend.</p>
+<p>And so it turned out. However dull Mrs. Crull might be as a
+scholar, she was quick-witted as a friend, and was constantly
+bestowing unexpected kindnesses upon Miss Pillbody. Scarcely a day
+passed that the young teacher did not receive from her pupil some
+little present--at times rising to the value of a bonnet or a
+shawl. Mrs. Crull's all-embracing kindness would have extended to
+the widow Pillbody too (in whom she was much interested from the
+daughter's accounts of her), but for the shrewd objection which she
+entertained against intrusting any one with the secret of her
+pupilage. Miss Pillbody was often and particularly enjoined by her
+not to tell any one--- not even her mother--of it; and she saw the
+advantages of carefully observing the request. Great pains were
+taken to keep Mr. Crull, and the housemaid, cook, and coachman,
+from a knowledge of the mystery.</p>
+<p>On Miss Pillbody's arrival daily at ten A.M., she was ushered
+into the drawing room, where Mrs. Crull was always anxiously
+awaiting her. The servant was told to say to callers that "Mistress
+is out" (Mrs. Crull bolted at this trifling deception at first, but
+soon got used to it), and the lesson began.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull at first thought she was competent to learn her
+native tongue and French together, in a series of half-hour
+lessons; but she soon found out that the latter language had some
+eccentric peculiarities quite beyond her powers of articulation,
+and that the spelling of a word did not afford the slightest clue
+to the method of pronouncing it. After floundering about heroically
+but hopelessly through the introductory chapter of the first French
+grammar, she gave up the polite tongue in despair, consoling
+herself with the reflection, that speaking bad French was worse
+than speaking no French at all.</p>
+<p>Miss Pillbody, who did not venture to advise her pupil on her
+choice of studies, but left her to consult her own fancies
+undisturbed, heartily approved of Mrs. Crull's conclusion, though
+she acknowledged that New York society by no means took that view
+of the case, but tolerated bad French with a courtesy worthy of
+France itself.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull's studies were thereafter confined to English
+spelling, grammar, and writing. She declared that she knew enough
+of arithmetic to count change correctly, and wanted to know no
+more; and that geography was of no earthly use to her. Besides, she
+never could remember the names of places.</p>
+<p>It was in pronunciation that Miss Pillbody's system achieved the
+greatest good. Anxious to strengthen herself on that weak point,
+Mrs. Crull set a watch on her language, and gave every word a good
+look before she sent it forth. The effect of this constant
+introspection was most happy; but, at times, Mrs. Crull would be
+thrown off her guard by a rush of ideas, and all the old blunders
+would come out. Toward other persons, she became, to some extent, a
+free teacher, and would, in the most obliging manner, rectify their
+little errors of pronunciation, when she was sure of them, and
+sometimes when she was not.</p>
+<p>Of course, Mr. Crull was taken in training by her. That
+gentleman, having made the discovery, early in life, that the less
+a man says, the more he is supposed to know, had acquired a habit
+of taciturnity which had become a second nature to him. His
+conversation consisted mainly of grunts and nods; and it was
+astonishing how much he could express by them. At any rate, they
+had "made his fortin', and he couldn't ha' done more'n that if he'd
+talked like a house a-fire"--which explanation, often repeated, was
+about the longest one ever known to be uttered by Mr. Crull.
+Therefore Mr. Crull did not offer a large field for the exhibition
+of his wife's new acquirements; but, by drawing him into
+conversation, and then lying in wait for him, she found
+opportunities to exhibit them for his good.</p>
+<p>At first, Mr. Crull only stared and grunted. Then he laughed
+(his laugh and Mrs. Crull's laugh were very similar, and were their
+strongest bond of union). Once he said, "Wonder what's the matter
+with the ole woman?" And, on a subsequent occasion, when Mrs. Crull
+had convicted him of three mistakes in five words, he ventured upon
+this protracted remark: "Guess the ole gal feels rather big since
+she got inter wot they call good s'ciety, eh?" This was in allusion
+to the recent successful speculation in tobacco, which had enabled
+Mr. Crull to buy the best house in Twenty-third street, and take
+the second best pew in a fashionable church, thereby placing Mrs.
+Crull at once within the charmed circle of society.</p>
+<p>As for himself, Mr. Crull took very little interest in society,
+having observed that society had taken very little interest in him
+until that "lucky turn in terbacker." Mrs. Crull would smile, and
+confess that society had claims upon people, and that, when one is
+in Rome, one must do as the Romans do. The moral of which proverb
+was, that Mr. Crull ought to improve his speech. Mr. Crull replied,
+by asking "wot difference 'twould make a hunderd years from now?"
+Which observation, when Mr. Crull condescended to speak at such
+length, was a favorite argument with him. But he little suspected
+his wife's secret.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="B_CHAPTER_VI."></a>CHAPTER VI.</h2>
+<h3>BRANCHING OUT.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>To Miss Pillbody, this quiet little arrangement proved a fortune
+indeed. In two weeks after she became acquainted with her
+benefactress, she was rich enough to take lodgings for her mother
+and herself at a decent boarding house. The old lady entertained
+singular notions about the rights of relationship, and held that it
+was the duty of her husband's brothers to give them a home for the
+balance of their lives, and regarded her daughter's desire to cut
+loose from her uncles, and be independent, as a romantic and absurd
+notion, born of novel reading, to which Miss Pillbody was a good
+deal addicted.</p>
+<p>To gratify her daughter's whim, the widow Pillbody finally
+consented to move into a boarding house, though she did it in the
+firm belief that the good luck which the young lady had fallen upon
+would be of brief duration, and they would be glad to come back to
+their relatives again--their "natteral protectors," as Mrs. P.
+called them.</p>
+<p>In their new residence, Miss Pillbody was happy. The money which
+she earned weekly, and which was always paid to her in advance, was
+sufficient for her own and her mother's board. In addition to other
+presents, Mrs. Crull had forced small sums upon her acceptance, at
+different times; and Miss Pillbody began to enjoy the odd sensation
+of laying up money in a savings bank. Of the future she thought but
+little; first, because she had no head for plans; and second,
+because Mrs. Crull had promised to set her up in a private school;
+and Miss Pillbody placed a blind trust in that lady. An accident,
+in this wise, caused the fulfilment of the promise much sooner than
+was expected.</p>
+<p>Mr. Crull, in getting out of a stage, one day, slipped on the
+step, and dislocated his left shoulder. At his age, careful
+treatment was necessary for an injury of that kind; and the family
+doctor peremptorily forbade him to leave the house for a month. Mr.
+Crull therefore stayed at home, growling like a bear in a cage, and
+solacing himself with the determination to bring a suit for damages
+against the stage company, the carelessness of whose driver (in Mr.
+Crull's opinion) caused the accident.</p>
+<p>Mr. Crull, like a good husband, would have nobody to nurse him,
+apply his embrocations, and put on his bandages, but his wife; and
+Mrs. Crull, like a good wife, cheerfully and tenderly performed
+that duty. But this rendered necessary the abandonment of the daily
+lessons at her house; for she was liable to be summoned to her
+husband's bedside at any moment (he sent for her at every new
+twinge of pain); and, furthermore, it was his custom to crawl out
+of his couch every half hour, and wander restlessly through the
+house, until his wife, under the stern instructions of the family
+doctor, sent him back to bed again.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull, though not wanting in love for her disabled consort,
+was loth to abandon her lessons. Having tasted of the Pierian
+spring, she desired to drink deeply.</p>
+<p>As Miss Pillbody could not continue her course of instruction at
+Mrs. Crull's residence, without being detected in the act by the
+invalid lord of that mansion; and as it was clearly impracticable
+for Mrs. Crull to go to Miss Pillbody's boarding house, and turn
+the widow Pillbody out of the little room which mother and daughter
+jointly occupied, the generous pupil hit upon the idea of renting
+the ground floor of a house for her teacher, setting apart one room
+as a schoolroom, fitting it up for her in comfortable style, and
+helping her to get wealthy adult pupils enough to pay all the
+expenses of the establishment, and a handsome income besides.</p>
+<p>Miss Pillbody thankfully accepted the noble offer; though she
+feared that she would never obtain scholars enough to repay the
+money which Mrs. Crull was willing to advance, and also to defray
+the current expenses of housekeeping.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull entertained no such fears. She had great faith in the
+efficacy of advertising. She had personally known three quacks who
+made half a million apiece out of patent medicines; and one woman
+who had turned a common recipe for removing superfluous hair into
+an eligible establishment in Thirty-second street, and a country
+cottage, with sixteen acres under good cultivation. She believed
+that newspaper advertising was the shortest and surest road to
+fortune; and the only standing cause of quarrel between her and her
+husband was the latter's incredulous "Pooh! pooh!" at her theory
+upon this subject.</p>
+<p>At her request, Miss Pillbody drew up this advertisement, and
+caused it to be inserted twice in three daily papers:</p>
+<p>"To LADIES IN GOOD SOCIETY WHO DESIRE TO IMPROVE THEIR
+EDUCATION.--A young lady who has moved in wealthy and fashionable
+circles, and has received the best education that New York city
+could afford, having met with reverses in fortune, would be happy
+to accept, as private pupils, a few ladies whose early cultivation
+was, for any reason, neglected. French, Italian, Spanish, vocal
+music, the piano, and all the English rudiments, taught at
+reasonable prices. Particular attention paid to pronunciation,
+spelling, and writing. Satisfactory references given and
+required.</p>
+<p>"N.B.--Pupils taught separately, and at different hours.</p>
+<p>"For further information, address 'Educatrix, New York Post
+Office.'"</p>
+<hr style="width: 25%;">
+<p>There were many points in this advertisement to which Miss
+Pillbody's modesty took exception; but Mrs. Crull insisted upon
+them in a way that permitted no refusal. The little bit of bragging
+was the principal thing, she said. She had always observed that
+people are inclined to believe bragging advertisements, though they
+openly profess that they can't be taken in by them. As for the
+satisfactory references, she would undertake to give them, if they
+were required--which, of course, they would not be, as the mere
+offering of them invariably sufficed. If called upon, she would say
+that she knew a wealthy lady, the head of a family, who had derived
+the greatest possible benefit from the instructions of "Educatrix."
+If asked who she was, she could answer, that "Educatrix" would on
+no account allow the name to be made known, as it was a great merit
+of her system that she kept the names of her pupils a profound
+secret from each other, and from the rest of the world. The good
+sense of this regulation would at once be appreciated by all mature
+ladies who wished to repair the defects of their early education.
+Her own position as the mistress of an elegant mansion in
+Twenty-third street, would (Mrs. Crull reasoned) entitle her
+statement to ready belief.</p>
+<p>The plan worked capitally. "Educatrix" received fifty answers to
+her advertisement, and was busy more than a week calling at the
+houses of those who desired an interview with her. The ladies were
+all in good circumstances, and, without an exception, were the
+wives of men who had made sudden fortunes, after the manner common
+in the United States. Finding themselves elevated above the
+necessity of cooking their own dinners and washing their own
+clothes, they keenly felt the want, hitherto unknown, of an
+education which would fit them, in a measure, for that society
+whose portals were now thrown wide open to them. Miss Pillbody's
+gentle manners and polished ways gained for her the confidence of
+all; and she could have had fifty pupils daily, at two dollars a
+lesson (the fixed price), of one hour each, if it had been possible
+to teach that number.</p>
+<p>Acting on the advice of Mrs. Crull, Miss Pillbody decided to
+accept only twelve pupils, for twenty-four lessons each, and devote
+six hours daily to them. This arrangement would give her six pupils
+a day; and the twelve would complete their course in about two
+months. Then she could take twelve more, and so on. It was plain,
+from the success of the first experiment, that there would never be
+a scarcity of pupils.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull then rented the first floor and basement of a
+suitable house in a quiet neighborhood, furnished it nicely, hired
+a grand piano for the front parlor, and turned over the premises
+and their contents to her young teacher. Miss Pillbody brought her
+mother to their new home, a fair share of which had been set apart
+and fitted up expressly for her.</p>
+<p>The old lady admitted, with some reluctance, that the house was
+not badly furnished, and that her daughter's prospects might be
+worse than they were. But who was this mysterious woman, that took
+such an interest in her daughter? What was her motive? she would
+like to know. And why was she so anxious to avoid her (Mrs.
+Pillbody)? To which questions her daughter responded, as she had
+done fifty times before, that her teaching was strictly private,
+and that none of her pupils would visit her, except under a pledge
+of the profoundest secrecy. Mrs. Pillbody shook her head
+doubtingly, and said, "We shall see," adding that she only hoped
+they would be as comfortable there as they were at Uncle John's and
+Daniel's, that was all.</p>
+<p>The school throve. The pupils came with great punctuality at
+their different hours, and were unknown to each other and to the
+world. The secret of the school would never have got abroad, but
+for the incaution of a certain Mrs. Brigback (wife of a man who had
+been connected with the City Government for two years on a nominal
+salary, and retired rich). She was so delighted at the progress
+which she made in the English rudiments, and in the French (being
+able to ask for bread, or fish, or concerning a person's health, in
+that language), that she could not refrain from confidentially
+advising another lady (the wife of a street contractor, suddenly
+opulent) to take a few lessons from the same accomplished teacher.
+The street contractor's wife was perfectly indifferent to society,
+and had no wish to remedy the defects of her early education. She
+promised secrecy, and the next day told the story, at the expense
+of her friend, to a mutual female acquaintance, who passed it on
+with embellishments to a third, who amused a fourth with its
+narration; and so it went through a succession of confidential
+people, until, one day, it became the subject of conversation in a
+stage in which Marcus Wilkeson was riding. He could not avoid
+hearing it; and, although the two ladies (themselves shockingly
+astray in their grammar) laughed at the absurdity of the thing,
+Marcus Wilkeson thought it was a capital idea. A plan which he had
+been idly revolving in his mind for the education of Miss Minford,
+began to take shape. The inventor (he reasoned) would not be likely
+to object to a strictly private school for his daughter, if the
+teacher were a lady of correct principles, and highly educated.</p>
+<p>Upon the last point, Marcus Wilkeson determined to satisfy
+himself. So he addressed a note, through the General Post Office,
+to "Miss Pillbody, New York City," requesting the privilege of an
+interview on business, at the residence of the lady, the exact
+location of which she was asked to designate.</p>
+<p>The letter was advertised (Miss Pillbody's address being unknown
+to the carrier), and, about two weeks after it was written, an
+answer came back to Mr. Wilkeson, at his house, giving information
+as to the whereabouts of the lady, and appointing the time for an
+interview.</p>
+<p>Mr. Wilkeson called, and in five minutes' conversation was
+satisfied of Miss Pillbody's moral and intellectual qualifications
+as teacher, and thought himself very fortunate in securing a
+vacancy among the pupils (caused by sudden illness) for Miss
+Minford. With what perfect confidence the suspicious inventor, as
+well as his simple-hearted daughter, accepted the frank offer of
+their friend and benefactor, we have already seen.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="B_CHAPTER_VII."></a>CHAPTER VII.</h2>
+<h3>THE LITTLE PUPIL.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>It was a pleasant winter's morning, when Mr. Minford and his
+daughter, and their singular friend, made a formal call on Miss
+Pillbody, by appointment. The inventor had overcome a difficulty in
+his machine, by introducing a cam movement, and was in excellent
+humor. As he walked along the streets, he said that the snow and
+the sky and his future all looked bright to him now. Of the two
+former objects his assertion was obviously true, and Pet enjoyed
+the shining scene, as youth, health, and innocence always do,
+without reference to the future.</p>
+<p>A few minutes' walk brought them to Miss Pillbody's private
+schoolhouse. A pull at the bell summoned a stout, red-faced servant
+girl to the door. To the question, if Miss Pillbody was in, she
+said, "Yaas, sir, ef yer plaze" (Miss P. had vainly endeavored to
+correct her English), and ushered her visitors into the reception
+parlor, or schoolroom.</p>
+<p>A pleasant place it was, and nicely warmed with a smouldering
+coal fire, the coziness and comfort of which, were fitly reflected
+from the red carpet, and red curtains, and red plush covered
+furniture. The grand piano, hired for use, gave the room that
+completely furnished appearance that nothing but a piano can give.
+A book of instruction, open at a passage which strongly resembled a
+rail fence through a rolling country, showed that inexperienced
+hands had recently been pounding the instrument. There was no sign
+of a school or any side, excepting a small blackboard, which had
+been hastily thrust into a corner, and which bore, faintly traced
+in chalk, a sum in simple division.</p>
+<p>The visitors sat down in the warm red chairs, and looked around
+the room but a moment, when Miss Pillbody entered by a door
+connecting with the rear parlor. She bowed gracefully to Mr.
+Wilkeson, and was by him introduced to his two companions. To the
+father she was profoundly respectful, and to the daughter tender
+and affectionate, grasping her hand closely, and smiling a welcome
+upon her.</p>
+<p>Pet was instantly fascinated with her future teacher. There was
+something lovable not only in her intelligent face, pale with the
+protracted labors of her daily life, but in the infirmity of her
+eyes, for she was shortsighted, and could see objects distinctly
+only by nearly closing the lids. This peculiarity, not disagreeable
+in itself, won upon Pet's compassion, and made her feel more at
+home in the strange lady's presence than if she were conscious that
+a pair of full-sighted orbs were looking at her, and accurately
+noting her defects.</p>
+<p>Miss Pillbody's occupation, for some weeks past, had given her a
+new idea of the value of time, and she proceeded at once to
+business, without wasting a single word upon the weather. In less
+than five minutes, she had, by artful inquiries and a winning
+voice, found out the exact range and extent of Miss Minford's
+acquirements, and agreed with the father that a further education
+in the English branches was unnecessary at that time (with the
+exception, perhaps, of an occasional exercise in reading), and that
+his daughter might devote twenty-four lessons to French and the
+piano, with hopes of success, provided she could study and practise
+several hours a day at her own home.</p>
+<p>Mr. Minford replied, that she could study French at home to her
+heart's content, but he had no piano. Whereupon Mr. Wilkeson took
+the liberty of suggesting that it might be possible to borrow one,
+at a moderate rate, by the month, and set it up in their front
+room. Miss Pillbody applauded this idea, and it was instantly
+agreed to.</p>
+<p>"For certain reasons, which I will not now mention," said Mr.
+Minford, "I am anxious to hurry up her education."</p>
+<p>"By the way, what is your first name, my dear?" asked Miss
+Pillbody. "It is quite awkward to call you Miss Minford, you
+know."</p>
+<p>The inventor answered for his daughter. "Her name is Patty,
+miss; and we call her Pet, for short, instead of Pat, which would
+be hardly appropriate."</p>
+<p>"A pretty name," said Miss Pillbody; "and she <i>is</i> a pet,
+if I mistake not." The teacher looked archly at Mr. Minford, and
+then affectionately at the daughter, through her half-shut eyes. "I
+promise you she shall be a pet here, provided, always, she learns
+her lessons like a good girl. We always insist on that first." The
+teacher waved her hand with magisterial authority as she spoke, but
+accompanied the act with a laugh, which made Pet laugh also.</p>
+<p>During this conversation, Mr. Minford had dwelt upon his machine
+in an undercurrent of thought; and an idea just then occurred to
+him, which he was desirous to test immediately. He therefore rose,
+and said that they would not detain Miss Pillbody any longer, and
+that his daughter would call and receive the first lesson at any
+time which that lady would name.</p>
+<p>"Her hour will be from nine to ten o'clock every other morning,
+and from three to four on alternate afternoons," said Miss
+Pillbody. "It is now half past ten," she added, consulting a watch.
+"Mrs. Penfeather, my eleven-o'clock pupil, is put of town to-day:
+so Miss Minford--that is. Pet--can commence now, and I will give
+her until twelve o'clock. This will save time."</p>
+<p>"Good!" remarked the inventor. "The great point is to save time.
+For certain reasons, as I said before, you have none to lose in
+educating my daughter. And, that we may not detain her a moment,
+Mr. Wilkeson, we will leave, if you please."</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson was glad to do this, for the conversation had
+already reached its natural terminus. He therefore followed Mr.
+Minford's motion, and grasped his hat and cane.</p>
+<p>"You are not afraid to stay here, child?" said-the inventor.</p>
+<p>"Oh, no," replied Pet, with a happy laugh. "I already feel quite
+at home."</p>
+<p>"And she shall always feel so here, I assure you, sir," added
+Miss Pillbody.</p>
+<p>Mr. Minford's new idea occurred to him again with fresh force,
+and he hurriedly said: "Good-by, Pet. Be a good girl, now, and see
+how much you can learn in your first lesson." Then he kissed her,
+jerked a bow at Miss Pillbody, and made his exit into the hall.
+Marcus Wilkeson added his best wishes for the progress of the
+little scholar, bade her and her teacher a pleasant farewell, and
+followed Mr. Minford.</p>
+<p>The child ran after them to the front door, and exchanged
+good-bys with them until they had turned the corner of the next
+street, when she entered the schoolroom, and straightway began her
+first lesson in the accomplishments of life.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_THIRD."></a>BOOK THIRD.</h2>
+<h3>THE TRAIL OF THE SERPENT.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="C_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>"ONE--TWO--THBEE--FOUR."</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Pet studied hard, and made great progress. Her father and Marcus
+Wilkeson watched her developing education with equal pride, and
+constantly applauded and encouraged her.</p>
+<p>The inventor did not know one word of French beyond the
+colloquial phrases with which everybody is familiar; but he would
+ask his daughter to read the crisp and tinkling tongue to him for
+hours at a time. He would hammer softly and file gently as she
+read, so that he might not lose a word of it. He would hear no news
+but that which she translated from the triweekly French paper
+published in the city. With correct and careful tuition at Miss
+Pillbody's, these constant exercises at home, ambition, and an
+excellent memory for languages, Pet was soon able not only to
+satisfy her teacher, but to make herself understood, in a small
+way, by a real French woman, Mdlle. Duchette, the forewoman of a
+candy store on the nearest business avenue.</p>
+<p>Pet followed every lesson on the piano at Miss Pillbody's by
+three hours of daily practice at home. Marcus had hired for her a
+small piano, warranted to be just the thing for beginners. In other
+words, the keys and pedals were nearly worn out, and could not be
+much further damaged by unpractised hands and feet. This instrument
+was squeezed in between the bureau and the washstand, filling up
+the last spare place in the crowded little room. Pet wanted to have
+it set up in the next apartment, and practise there in the cold,
+alone; but neither her father nor Marcus would listen to that
+proposition for a moment.</p>
+<p>Mr. Minford's nerves were extremely sensitive to sound. They
+vibrated to it, like Aeolian harp in the wind. He placed pianos,
+cats, fish peddlers, and hand organs on precisely the same footing,
+as nuisances. Nothing but the ruling desire to make a lady of his
+child, could have steeled him to the endurance, hour after hour, of
+her monotonous "One--two--three--four," and the discordant banging
+which accompanied those plaintive utterances.</p>
+<p>The permanent discords with which the piano was afflicted, or
+the striking of a false note, would sometimes set his teeth on
+edge; but he would only hold his jaws tightly together, beat time
+with his head, and smile a hypocritical approval. Sometimes he
+would torture himself playfully, and make Pet laugh, by running a
+musical opposition with his three-cornered file--a small but
+effective instrument.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson was equally tolerant of Pet's practice, and
+there was little false pretence in the patience with which he
+listened. Happily, he was not all alive to sounds. Screeches and
+harmonies were pretty much the same to him. Since he was a boy, he
+had been trying (privately) to sing, or whistle, "Auld Lang Syne,"
+and had not yet mastered the first bar of it. He watched Pet's
+little fingers moving up and down the piano with mechanical
+repetition, and was truly interested in the sight--for two reasons:
+first, the motion was graceful; and second, she was acquiring an
+accomplishment which he held in the highest esteem, because Nature
+had put it entirely beyond his reach.</p>
+<p>Sometimes, but not often, Bog was a listener at these rudimental
+concerts. Since Marcus had come to the relief of the family, Bog
+felt that his mission was ended. He knew that it was a piece of
+pure hypocrisy to call once or twice a week to see if he could be
+of any service, when he was aware that Mr. Minford had hired a
+woman, who lived on the floor below, to do all their household
+work, marketing, cooking, and general errands. He knew that Pet, on
+these occasions, asked him to go for a spool of thread, or a paper
+of needles, or a package of candy, merely to gratify him with the
+idea that he was making himself useful. When he came into the room
+tidily dressed, and highly polished as to his boots, he blushed
+even redder than he used to. It was not the acquisition of a little
+money by Mr. Minford that had exalted his daughter in the-eyes of
+Bog, but the French and the music. These two accomplishments seemed
+to lift her into an upper air of delicacy and refinement, for which
+Bog felt that his miserable education and clumsy manners quite
+unfitted him. After Bog had performed some little invented errand
+for her, she would reward him with a short exercise, and Bog would
+sit, with open mouth and crossed legs, staring at Pet's face and
+hands alternately, and beating time with his large red hands on his
+knees.</p>
+<p>Bog knew the negro songs of the period, and admired them. He
+would have liked to hear Pet play them, but feared she would think
+his musical taste very bad if he asked her to. Her "exercises," as
+she called them, he considered something perfectly wonderful, and
+belonging to a class of scientific music which a poor fellow like
+him could not be expected to enjoy. But, like many an older and
+more worldly-wise person, he pretended to be thrown into raptures
+by it, and, at every pause in the playing, would say, "Beautiful!
+a'n't it?" "That's prime!" or "Splendid!" or "The best I ever
+heerd." Sometimes, at his earnest entreaty, Pet would read a page
+of French to him; and he would listen with awe and reverence, as to
+a beautiful sibyl prophesying in an unknown tongue.</p>
+<p>Bog always paid these visits in the afternoon. Marcus Wilkeson
+always called in the evening. The two had met in the house rarely
+since New Year's. When they accidentally met on the sidewalk,
+within a square or two of the house, as they sometimes did, Bog
+colored up as if he were guilty of something. Once Marcus Wilkeson
+saw Bog at a distance, turning suddenly down a side street, as if
+to avoid him; and Marcus wondered what could be the matter with the
+boy. By industry and tact, Bog made money in his new partnership,
+and had already laid up a snug sum in the savings bank.</p>
+<p>Between Pet and her teacher a feeling of sisterly affection had
+sprung up. Miss Pillbody turned with a feeling of relief from her
+dull elderly pupils, stiff in manners, and firmly set in their
+habits, to this fresh, impressible young creature. What she did
+conscientiously to the others for pay, she would have done to Pet
+for love, had not her bills been settled in advance. Whenever Miss
+Pillbody had a spare hour or two, afforded by the indisposition of
+one of her older scholars (from excessive fatigue occasioned by a
+dinner party or other laborious hospitality the night before), she
+would send the red-headed servant to Mr. Minford's, and notify Pet,
+who was only too happy to go to her beloved teacher, and take an
+extra lesson.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull could not be called a promising pupil. Her intentions
+were excellent. Her patience and her good nature were unbounded.
+She was always punctual at her lessons. Neither cold nor storm
+could keep her away. While she was in the schoolroom, she would
+resolutely deny herself the pleasure of indulging in more than a
+dozen episodes on the fashions and bits of scandal which she picked
+up in her cruise through society.</p>
+<p>With the exception of these little wanderings, she would go
+through her recitations with as much correctness and docility as a
+sharp-witted child of twelve years. She felt a childlike pride in
+gaining the approval of her teacher. When she was under Miss
+Pillbody's instructions, and knew that every mistake would be
+courteously but firmly corrected on the spot (the teacher's
+invariable custom), she kept such a guard upon her tongue that she
+sometimes read or conversed in long sentences without making a
+single error. But when she was out of Miss Pillbody's sight, there
+were certain blunders which she fell into as surely as she opened
+her mouth.</p>
+<p>Sometimes Mrs. Crull and Pet would meet on the doorsteps of Miss
+Pillbody's house--the one going in and the other coming out--or on
+the sidewalk in the neighborhood. Mrs. Crull would catch the child
+by both hands, smack her heartily on the cheek (no matter how
+public the kiss), and then a conversation something like this would
+follow:</p>
+<p>"How bright and pretty you look this mornin', my darlin!" (Mrs.
+Crull could not remember to pick up the "g's," except under Miss
+Pillbody's eye, and then not always.)</p>
+<p>"Thank you, Mrs. Crull; I am quite well. How are you, marm?"</p>
+<p>"Oh! smart as a trap. Haven't known not a sick day these ten
+years." (Mrs. Crull was weak on the double negatives.)</p>
+<p>"How do you get along?" From motives of delicacy, Pet never
+added, "in your studies."</p>
+<p>"Well, I don't mind tellin' you, as you are my confidential
+little friend." Here Mrs. Crull would look around cautiously, to be
+sure no one was listening. "The other studies isn't so hard, but
+grammar knocks me." (Mrs. Crull's nominatives and verbs were
+irreconcilable.)</p>
+<p>Then Pet would say, telling an innocent fib:</p>
+<p>"I don't observe anything very wrong, Mrs. Crull."</p>
+<p>"Ha! ha! there you are flattering me, you little chick. I know,
+or think, I have improved a good deal with our dear Miss Pillbody;
+but a smart little scholar like you must see lots of mistakes in
+me."</p>
+<p>At this point, Pet would blush, and murmur, "No--no!"</p>
+<p>"Humbug!" Mrs. Crull would say. "I know my incurable faults, and
+I know that you know 'em. But Lor' bless you, child! there is
+plenty of ladies in good s'ciety" (Mrs. C. always slurred on the
+first syllable of that word) "who talk as bad as me. Their
+husbands, just like mine, got rich suddenly, you see. I tell you, I
+was 'stonished to find how many of 'em there was. They are
+thicker'n blackberries. I found out something else, too." Here Mrs.
+Crull would shake her head knowingly, like one who had discovered a
+great truth.</p>
+<p>Pet would know what was coming, but would ask: "Pray, what is
+it, Mrs. Crull?"</p>
+<p>"Why, I found out that, if you give good dinners and big
+parties, and keep a carriage, and have a conservatory, and rent a
+pew up near the altar, your little shortcomin's in grammar isn't no
+objection to you. 'Money makes the mare go.' However, eddication,
+as Miss Pillbody says, is a good thing of itself, and I shall keep
+on tryin' to get it."</p>
+<p>These conversations always ended by an invitation to Pet to
+visit Mrs. Crull. "I'll have our carriage call for you," she would
+say, "at your father's house. We have no children, you know, and
+the old man would be very good to you; though, of course, it
+wouldn't do to hint about the school. But I can trust my little
+friend for that. Come, now, won't you?"</p>
+<p>But Pet always modestly declined these kind invitations. She
+knew her father's pride, and his aversion to the patronage of rich
+people.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="C_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>THE FALLING BOARD.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>One afternoon, Pet had been taking an extra lesson from Miss
+Pillbody, and had started homeward with a light heart, humming to
+herself a musical exercise which she had practised for the first
+time that day. A few doors from Miss Pillbody's, some workmen were
+repairing a wooden awning. The framework was covered with loose
+boards, which the carpenters were about to nail down. A feminine
+dread of danger would have induced Pet to make a wide detour of
+this awning; but her mind was so fully occupied by the musical
+exercise, that she walked, unheeding, right under it.</p>
+<p>"Look out! look out!" shrieked a chorus of voices overhead,
+accompanied by a rattle of falling boards. Pet sprang forward just
+in time to escape one of them, and to catch another on her
+shoulder. It touched her gently, not even abrading her skin, for
+its fall had been stopped midway by a young man.</p>
+<p>"Stupid!" "Silly creature!" "The girl's a blockhead!" "Where's
+her eyes, I wonder?" shouted the carpenters, after the manner of
+carmen and stage drivers, when you narrowly escape being run over
+by <i>their</i> carelessness, at the crossings.</p>
+<p>"Shut up!" said the young man, savagely. "Why the d---l don't
+you keep your boards where they belong, instead of tumbling them
+down on people's heads?--I hope you are not hurt, miss?" (in a
+gentle voice).</p>
+<p>"Oh, no; not at all. I am sure I thank you, sir, very much." Pet
+blushed, and hurried away.</p>
+<p>The young man and the carpenters then exchanged the customary
+abusive epithets with each other, which might have resulted in
+something more serious (though such verbal encounters rarely do),
+but for the desire of the young man to overtake the young girl whom
+he had saved from a bruised shoulder, or a worse accident. Shaking
+his fist at the four jeering carpenters, and muttering a farewell
+execration between his teeth, he rapidly followed Pet, and soon
+came up with her.</p>
+<p>"You are sure you are not hurt?" said he. "Those scoundrelly
+workmen! I'll thrash one of them yet."</p>
+<p>Pet was confused by the second appearance of the young man at
+her side, though she knew that he would follow her; even her brief
+experience having taught her that it is not in the nature of man to
+do a kindness to a woman, without exacting a full acknowledgment
+for it.</p>
+<p>"No, sir; I am not hurt the least bit," she replied, looking in
+his face no more than gratitude and civility required. Here she
+would have stopped, but she feared (charming simplicity of
+girlhood) that the young man would, some future day, get into
+trouble with the four carpenters. So she added, timidly: "As for
+the workmen, sir, they were not to blame. It was all my fault,
+running into the danger. I--I beg, sir, that you won't say another
+word to them."</p>
+<p>This was a long speech for timid Pet to make to a stranger, and
+she blushed fearfully at the end of it, and wished that the young
+man would go away.</p>
+<p>"They deserve a thrashing, every one of them," said he; "but,
+for your sake, I let them go." The young man spoke in a sweet
+voice, and his manner was respectful. Pet had observed, in several
+hasty side glances, that he was nicely dressed, and not
+ill-featured, in all except the eyes. But had his eyes been large
+and handsome, instead of small and forbidding, she would have
+desired his absence all the same.</p>
+<p>"You say you are not hurt," he continued; "but you may be,
+without knowing it. I have heard of people receiving serious
+injuries, and never finding them out till they got home. Have you
+far to go, miss?"</p>
+<p>"Only two blocks farther," said Pet, turning the corner.</p>
+<p>"The very route I was going," observed the young man.</p>
+<p>Although Pet felt that the young man's company was unnecessary
+and disagreeable, she did not like to tell him so. She kept silence
+until she reached her home, when she said, "I stop here, sir." She
+would have added, "Good-by, sir," or "Thank you, sir," or something
+equivalent, but instinct checked the expression, and she darted
+into the entry (the door being accidentally ajar), and shut the
+door after her, before the young man could say a word. Although the
+door was shut, he raised his hat respectfully as one often does on
+Broadway <i>after</i> he has passed a female acquaintance upon whom
+he suddenly comes--the salute being received and acknowledged with
+a stare by the next lady, or ladies, following after. The young man
+then noted the number of the house, nodded satisfactorily to
+himself, and strolled very leisurely along the street, as if
+neither business nor pleasure had urgent demands upon him.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="C_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>SNEAKING JUSTIFIED.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Neither Pet nor the young man saw the awkward figure of an
+overgrown boy, who had followed them at a distance, on the other
+side of the street, keeping the trunks of trees between them and
+him. This clumsy figure, upon which a suit of good clothes and a
+new cap looked strangely out of place, was Bog.</p>
+<p>The boy Bog was often seen lounging about the neighborhood of
+Miss Pillbody's school; and if the policeman on that beat had not
+known him to be an honest lad from childhood, he would have watched
+him as a suspicious character. From whatever part of the city Bog
+came home after a bill-posting expedition, he invariably made a
+circuit past Miss Pillbody's school, keeping the other side of the
+street always, and never looking at the house. He walked hurriedly
+by, but came to a sudden stop at a grocery store halfway up the
+second block beyond, and there he would stand, partly covered by an
+awning post, and look strangely around, letting his eyes fall
+occasionally, and as if by accident, on that house. If his object
+in these singular manoeuvres was to see Miss Minford, he always
+failed to improve the opportunity when it offered; for, as surely
+as Pet came out from the school, or turned into the street to go
+toward it, so surely did the boy Bog walk off whistling in another
+direction. Nobody can understand the motives of Bog's conduct,
+except those who have done the same thing in their youthful
+days.</p>
+<p>On this eventful afternoon (eventful as a starting point in a
+history of sorrows), Bog had taken his usual circuitous route home
+from a profitable professional tour on the east side of town.
+Reaching the grocery store, he sheltered himself behind the
+friendly post, and commenced looking up and down the street, and
+across the way, and into the sky, always winding up his mysterious
+observations by a single glance at Miss Pillbody's front door. When
+Pet came out, after her musical exercise, the boy Bog flushed up a
+little, turned upon his heels, and walked quickly away. He had not
+gone a dozen steps, before the shouts of the workmen and the sound
+of the first falling board reached his ears. He suddenly turned
+about, and saw a young man catching the next board that fell. His
+first impulse was to run to Pet's assistance; but a fatal spell
+chained his feet.</p>
+<p>Poor Bog had dreamed a thousand times, by night and by day, of
+the ineffable bliss of rescuing Pet from a mad dog, from a runaway
+horse, from the assault of ruffians, from drowning, from a burning
+building. He had his plans all laid for doing every one of these
+things. He would have coveted the pleasure of whipping three times
+his weight of any well-dressed, white-handed young men, who should
+presume to insult her. In imagination, he had done it times without
+number; and had contrived a private method to double up a number of
+effeminate antagonists in succession. But, in all his reveries, he
+had never anticipated peril to Miss Minford from a falling board;
+nor had it occurred to him that the supreme felicity of saving her
+from death or injury would ever be the lot of anybody else.</p>
+<p>The entire novelty of the accident and rescue struck him with
+amazement, and fastened him to the spot long enough to see that Pet
+walked away apparently unhurt. Hardly knowing what he did, or why
+he did it, he shifted his body behind the awning post so as
+continually to keep himself out of Pet's sight. Then the strong
+conviction came upon him that it was his duty to escort Pet home;
+for, although she did not seem to be hurt, she might be. This
+conviction was met and almost put down by the thought that Pet
+would know he had been watching for her; and he could not bear
+that. While he was halting and sweating between these two opinions,
+the unknown young man had finished his little colloquy with the
+four carpenters, and, by walking fast, had caught up with Pet.</p>
+<p>Then the boy Bog decided that his wisest course, under all the
+circumstances, would be to follow the couple at a distance, and see
+that no harm came to her from the young man.</p>
+<p>"If the feller insults her," murmured Bog, "just because he was
+lucky enough to do her a little bit of a kindness, I'll lick him
+till he's blue." Besides whipping him for the insults which he
+might offer, Bog felt that he could give him a few good blows for
+his impudence in assuming Bog's exclusive prerogative of rescuing
+that particular young girl.</p>
+<p>Bog looked very sheepish as he sneaked from one street corner to
+another, and skulked in shadows to avoid observation, though he
+tried to flatter himself that he was doing something highly
+meritorious. Two or three times, when the unknown young man
+inclined his head toward Pet, as if to speak to her, Bog
+entertained a hope that she would command him to leave her, and
+that he wouldn't. A single gesture from her, an impatient shrug of
+the shoulders, a turning away of her head, would have been all the
+hint that Bog needed to fly to her relief, and make up for his lost
+opportunity by knocking his dandy rival into the gutter.</p>
+<p>But not even Bog's sharp eyes could detect any impudent
+familiarity in the young man's conduct, or any desire on the part
+of Pet to get rid of him. "Everything is agin' me," said Bog,
+wiping the perspiration from his forehead.</p>
+<p>When Bog saw Pet part from the young man at Mr. Minford's door,
+his first wild idea was to call on her, quite by accident, in the
+course of half an hour. Perhaps she would tell him--as a piece of
+startling news--about her narrow escape from the board, and what
+the young man said to her. But Bog was unequal to the dissimulation
+involved in this plan, and abandoned it. Then he had a notion of
+following the young man, and seeing what became of him. But a
+sudden and very decided rising of fresh blood to Bog's cheeks and
+ears told him that he had played the part of spy long enough. So
+Bog determined--as many grown-up people in graver dilemmas do--to
+go home to supper.</p>
+<p>Bog found his supper all ready for him, and it was a good one.
+For his aunt, although the victim of a chronic rheumatism, had
+contrived to preserve a sharp appetite from the wreck of her former
+health, and cooked three meals for herself and two for Bog (who was
+never home at noon) daily. She was singularly punctual, too.
+Breakfast was always smoking hot on the table at 6 A.M.; and supper
+(and dinner combined, for Bog) was never a minute behind 5 P.M. in
+the winter time. Bog, who had a truly boyish idea of feminine
+excellencies, considered that this knack of cooking, and this
+amazing punctuality, were more than an offset for his aunt's little
+infirmities of temper, and her everlasting discourse on the
+rheumatics.</p>
+<p>Though the beef hash was good, and the toast nicely browned and
+buttered, and the tea strong, and the fire burning brightly through
+the grates of the stove, and the curtains snugly drawn, and
+everything cheerful and comfortable in Bog's humble home, the boy
+was unhappy, and could not eat.</p>
+<p>Happily, his aunt was so engrossed with her own physical
+troubles, that she never noticed indications of ill health in other
+people. She held that every other human ailment was unworthy of
+mention in the presence of her sovereign affliction. Whenever
+anybody presumed to speak of their little personal sufferings
+before her, she said: "You should thank Heaven you haven't got the
+rheumatics," and would then proceed to give a circumstantial
+history of her acquaintance with that disease. Therefore, on this
+occasion, she was quite unaware that poor Bog sat opposite to her
+with a pale, dejected face, playing aimlessly on his plate with his
+knife and fork. She thought only, and talked only, of her malady,
+which had been pranking in the oddest manner all day, and had
+settled, at last, in her "limbs." Bog's aunt had no legs that she
+would own to.</p>
+<p>After supper, Bog heaved a sigh, and said that he would go round
+to Uncle Ith's; and asked his aunt if she had any word to send by
+him.</p>
+<p>"Oh, no; nothing partickler," said she. "He don't care about
+me."</p>
+<p>Uncle Ith, as everybody called him, was Bog's uncle on his
+mother's side. Uncle Ith and the aunt had a standing difference
+touching that rheumatism. Whenever they met--which was
+rarely--Uncle Ith would ask her, with a wink, how she was; and when
+she candidly told him that she was in a dreadful state, he would
+laugh at her, and say that half of it was "imagination." This
+indignity he had repeated so often, that, latterly, she scorned to
+complain in his presence, and bore her anguish in noble
+silence.</p>
+<p>"All right," said Bog, who took no part in these family
+differences. He put on his cap, and left the house.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="C_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>UP IN THE AIR.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>"Uncle Ith" was one of the city bellringers, and lived at the
+top of a tower a hundred feet high, which vibrated with every
+stroke of the great bell hanging midway between his airy perch and
+the ground. He was sixty years of age, and had white hair, but he
+was as strong as younger men, and could swing the clapper against
+the side of the great bell with a boom that could be heard across
+rivers, and far into the peaceful country, on quiet nights. His
+eyes were so sharp, that, without the aid of a glass, he could read
+names on the paddle boxes of steamboats, where the unassisted
+vision of most persons descried nothing but a blur. He had done
+duty on that tower during the six years since it was built; and he
+knew the section of the city which lay spread out beneath him as a
+man knows his own garden. In the daytime, he could always guess,
+within a street or two, the location of any fire in his district.
+He knew all the smokes from a hundred factories, foundries,
+distilleries, and never confounded them with the fires which it was
+his business to detect. The presence of a new and suspicious smoke
+among the black stretch of roofs, caught his eye instantly; and he
+could tell in a moment, by its color, its speed of ascent, and the
+quantity of sparks accompanying it, whether it came from a
+carpenter's shop, a stable, a distillery, a camphene and oil store,
+or some other kind of building. In the nighttime, he knew the
+lights which mapped out the squares and the streets within his
+range of observation, almost as well as the astronomer knows the
+other lights that shine down upon the sleeping city from the
+heavens. He could fix the position of a fire by night rather better
+than by day, because he had the red reflection of the flames on
+well-known steeples, and high, prominent roofs to guide him.</p>
+<p>Such were Uncle Ith's qualifications for his place; and he was
+so loved and trusted by the firemen of his district, that no mayor,
+however beset by applicants for office, had ever dreamed of
+removing him. In all of Uncle Ith's limited relations with the
+world, he was esteemed an honest man; and his word would have
+possessed the literal novelty of being as good as his note, had
+necessity ever required him to borrow money. But Uncle Ith was
+frugal, and made his small salary suffice for himself and a family
+of seven motherless children.</p>
+<p>He had one eccentricity--a complete indifference to newspapers.
+He never bought nor borrowed them. "What's the use of reading 'em?"
+he would say. "Why not imagine the murders, suicides, political
+meetings, and other trash that fills 'em, and save your money for
+terbacker?" This did Uncle Ith, and he flattered himself that it
+was wisely done.</p>
+<p>The bell tower was not far from the boy's home, and in a few
+minutes he stood at the foot of it, and shouted to Uncle Ith:
+"Hallo, there!"</p>
+<p>Uncle Ith, always on the alert for calls, poked his head out of
+the window, which he left partly open for ventilation in the
+coldest nights, and answered, rather gruffly, "Well, what's
+wanted?" He never allowed his own children, nor any persons except
+his nephew Bog, and a few old firemen, friends of his, to visit him
+in the tower at night. Uncle Ith was conscientious. The presence of
+his children, with whom he loved to converse, or that of strangers,
+who would stare vacantly all over the lighted city, and ask
+innumerable questions, interfered with the strictness of his watch.
+Uncle Ith was a little eccentric, too, in his devotion to duty.</p>
+<p>"It's me, uncle," said Bog, screaming upward.</p>
+<p>"Glad to see you, Bog. You can come up," shouted the old man in
+return. He slung a latch key, fastened to a string, out of the
+window. It slid down the side of the tower, into Bog's hand. He
+unlocked the door, and the next moment the key was jerked aloft.
+The boy entered the base of the tower. He was so familiar with
+every crook and passage, that the small light of a gas jet, inside,
+was not necessary to show him the way. Up he ran, sometimes
+clearing two steps at a jump, slipping his hand lightly along the
+rough wooden banister. A few spiral turns brought him to the bell,
+which hung in an open framework of timber. He gave the huge bronze
+a familiar tap as he passed, and wound on and upward until he came
+to a trap door, which Uncle Ith held invitingly open. Then he
+sprang into the little room at the top of the tower, and Uncle Ith
+shook him by the hand.</p>
+<p>"You look well, I see, Bog. And how is your aunt?" Uncle Ith was
+mindful of the usages of society, and always asked after her.</p>
+<p>"Oh, she's smart," said Bog, totally oblivious of her
+rheumatism, "and sent her love to ye." Bog was a peacemaker.</p>
+<p>"Sent her rheumatism, I guess yer mean. No doubt she wishes I
+had it."</p>
+<p>Bog laughed, and his uncle laughed. And then his uncle, never
+forgetting duty, took a sharp look out of the eight clearly
+polished windows that commanded a view of the surrounding district.
+Discovering no sign of fire, he resumed the conversation with his
+nephew, asking him about his business (which he was happy to learn
+was prosperous), and giving him a quantity of good advice which
+none but a genius could remember, or an angel follow. During these
+exhortations, Uncle Ith paced to and fro in the little room,
+looking out of some window at the end of every sentence. Bog sat on
+a three-legged stool (the only seat except a backless chair) by the
+side of a miniature stove, on whose top hissed the kettle, from
+which Uncle Ith made his pot of coffee at midnight.</p>
+<p>The night was cold; the little fire was warm; and Bog liked to
+hear advice from his uncle; but his eyes would wander to a certain
+window, as if, for some reason, he would derive great pleasure in
+opening and looking out of it. This movement of his eyes was so
+frequent, that Uncle Ith observed it, and said:</p>
+<p>"Ah, I see! You want to stare out of that southeast window
+again. Now, I think the sight is handsomer to the west, where you
+can see the lights of Jersey City and Hoboken, and on the ferry
+boats and the shipping anchored in North River. But that's a matter
+o' taste. Well, look out o' the window, if you want to. I guess I
+can trust you for fires in that quarter."</p>
+<p>"That you may!" answered Bog, throwing open the southeast
+window.</p>
+<p>The stars above twinkled crisply in the frosty air; and the sky,
+with its low horizon on every side, seemed infinitely vaster than
+it did to Bog in the narrow and high-walled streets of the city.
+But Bog, though he used to puzzle over the wonders of the heavens
+when he was a few years younger, and had picked up a little
+something of astronomy from his uncle Ith (who knew something of
+that as of many other sciences), did not turn his gaze to them. Nor
+did he give more than a sweeping glance at the dotted line of
+lights below, stretching out in long perspectives, until the two
+luminous points at the end seemed blended into one. There were
+several parks in sight, which looked like portions of the sky let
+down on the earth, in all but the mathematical regularity of their
+mock stars. But Bog's eyes passed them by. To an inquisitive mind,
+there was something of interest to be seen and speculated over, in
+the lighted windows of houses all about him. People could be seen
+eating their late suppers, rocking by the fire, playing the piano,
+dancing, taking a rubber at whist or euchre, or diverting
+themselves with other recreations of winter house life. In one
+upper chamber, a physician was presenting a child just born to the
+proud father. In another, there was a mysterious spectacle, which a
+closer examination might have proved to be the preparing of a dead
+body for the morrow's burial. But Bog saw none of these sights.</p>
+<p>His eyes sought for, and found immediately, as if by instinct,
+one light, which, in his opinion, was the only one worth looking at
+on earth or sky. It was a single bright gas jet, burning very close
+to a window about six hundred feet distant from him in an air line.
+Several tall chimneys of intervening houses rose almost between him
+and this light, and, perhaps, their dark, spectral shapes aided him
+in identifying it so readily. The lower sash of the window through
+which the light shone was curtained, but the upper part was
+uncovered; and an observer on the tower, being fifty or sixty feet
+above the top of the curtain, could easily look into the room. Bog
+rubbed his eyes, into which the cold but not biting wind had
+brought the tears, and gazed anxiously into Mr. Minford's
+apartment.</p>
+<p>The pale inventor stood a few feet from the window, attentively
+examining a mass of machinery before him, upon which the light
+shone strongly. Only the tops of the wheels and of the more complex
+parts were visible; but there was one lever, or bar, connected with
+it, which rose above the whole, and could be seen by Bog to the
+extent of at least two feet. This was an addition to the strange
+machine as Bog had last seen it, and he contemplated it with
+fearful interest.</p>
+<p>Mr. Minford stood motionless for five minutes in the presence of
+his creation. He was ghostlike and frightful in that fixed
+attitude, and Bog wished that he would move. He did so, nodding his
+head, and smiling, as he bent down and detached some part of the
+machine. All but his head and his right shoulder then disappeared
+from view; but Bog knew, by the vibrating motion of his shoulder
+blade, that he was filing upon something. Mr. Minford then stooped
+again, as if to put the part of the machine back into its proper
+place. Having done this, he stood erect once more, folded his arms,
+and looked intently at the Mystery for the second time.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="C_CHAPTER_V."></a>CHAPTER V.</h2>
+<h3>TONGUES OF FIRE.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>But now Bog's attention was diverted from Mr. Minford, and his
+heart was made to beat more rapidly by a new sight. While he had
+kept both eyes closely fixed upon the inventor, he had looked with
+an oblique, or reflected vision, into the other window of the room.
+This window was uncurtained, and Bog could distinctly see the
+chairs, bureau, and other articles of furniture. A new light (so
+Bog oddly thought) was suddenly irradiated through the darker
+portion of the apartment by the entrance of Pet from the hall. She
+had no bonnet on; and Bog reasoned (if he could be said to reason
+in his excited state) that she had been spending a part of the
+evening, as was often her wont, with a poor family, rich in
+children, who lived on the floor below. Her father smiled upon the
+problem before him, as a new difficulty melted away under his
+burning gaze. Then he turned, and smiled at Pet. She ran toward
+him, and he kissed her tenderly. Bog was devouring this little
+episode with open mouth and eyes, when the hoarse voice of Uncle
+Ith broke in upon the enchantment:</p>
+<p>"Hallo! there's a fire."</p>
+<p>"What! Where?" shouted Bog, forgetting where he was.</p>
+<p>"Why, you blind man!" said Uncle Ith; "straight afore ye. Don't
+ye see it breaking out?"</p>
+<p>Bog cast his eyes about him wildly; and, sure enough, directly
+in the range of Mr. Minford's house, but four or five blocks
+beyond, there was an illuminated streak of smoke curling up from a
+roof.</p>
+<p>"It's in my district!" cried Uncle Ith. "So here goes." He
+seized the long iron lever near him, by which the enormous clapper
+of the bell was swung, and moved it like the handle of a pump. The
+second motion was followed by a hoarse sound, which shook the tower
+to its foundations, and started into listening attitudes a thousand
+firemen in their engine or hose houses, in the streets, at the
+theatres, or at their own homes.</p>
+<p>"Sha'n't I help you?" asked Bog, who always proffered his
+services on these occasions.</p>
+<p>"Pooh! no. It's baby play for me." By this time Uncle Ith had
+evoked the second gruff note from the deep throat of the imprisoned
+monster below. Then came a third in quicker succession, and louder,
+as if the bell had warmed up to the work, and then other notes,
+until the district had been struck; and then the bell, as if
+rejoicing in its strength to resist blows, murmured plaintively for
+a repetition of them. Long before this sad sound had died away, the
+deep bass of the City Hall bell, the shrill tenor of the Post
+Office bell, and the intermediate pitches of the bells all over the
+city, had taken up the chorus of alarm. There was a rattle of
+engines, hose carriages, and hook-and-ladder trucks through the
+streets. There was a frantic rush of men and boys, some with
+cumbrous fire-caps on their heads, and putting on their coats as
+they ran. How they knew the location of the fire, none could guess,
+for it had not yet streamed out against the sky; but know it they
+did; and the dove goes to its cote not more directly than they
+centred from all parts of the district upon the exact spot of the
+fire. Meanwhile, Uncle Ith lashed his mighty instrument into a
+sonorous fury; and all the other bells played their echo, even to
+the far-away tinkler on Mount Morris, which, having few fires in
+its own neighborhood to report, took a pleasure in telling its
+little world of those which were raging down town.</p>
+<p>For the information of his uncle, and to atone in part for his
+previous neglect, Bog devoted only a half eye to the Minford
+family, and kept the rest of his optics on the fire. Just after its
+discovery, the smoke had loomed up dense and black, as if it were
+trying to suffocate the flames beneath. Then it changed rapidly to
+a light blue, and was chased faster upward by two tongues of fire.
+These tongues leaped aloft with a sudden impulse, and shed a
+revelation of light over acres of houses, and brought out church
+steeples in vivid relief against the sky, and put a new gilding on
+storm-beat en vanes and weathercocks. All this Bog described in his
+own way to his uncle; and his uncle, stooping at the lever, kept on
+ringing with unabated zeal; and all the other bells banged away
+like an orchestra of which Uncle Ith was the leader.</p>
+<p>Then Bog saw the forms of men suddenly spring into sight, as if
+out of the very roof, between the two fiery tongues. The tongues
+licked the air about them with savage whirls; but the brave fellows
+dodged back, and were unhurt. Then, advancing boldly again, they
+released their hands from something which they had been holding,
+and lo! four jets of water struck at the very roots of the flames,
+tripped at them, and made them stagger, drove them twice into the
+roof, and caught them with deadly accuracy as they came out again;
+and, in less than five minutes, changed all their brave splendor to
+dull, black smoke, and set the victor's mark upon them--the column
+of white steam which arises from the half-quenched embers, and
+proclaims that the fire is put out of mischief at last.</p>
+<p>"Nothing but a kind o' white smoke, now," said Bog.</p>
+<p>Uncle Ith, who had just rung the last stroke of a round,
+relinquished the lever, and looked over the shoulder of his nephew.
+"The fire's out," said he. "When you see the steam comin' up that
+way, you may know that the water has whipped." The old man then
+seated himself in the backless chair, produced a short black pipe
+from a crossbeam overhead, and rewarded himself with a few long
+puffs.</p>
+<p>When Uncle Ith had a pipe in his mouth, he became didactic, and
+he therefore proceeded to renew his donations of valuable advice to
+his nephew, who was still looking hard out of the southeast
+window.</p>
+<p>Bog cocked his head on one side, to make a show of listening,
+and said "Yes, sir," now and then, which was all that his uncle
+expected of him. But his whole mind, and his heart, were in the
+little double-windowed room, where Pet was now practising upon the
+piano. Through the uncurtained glass, Bog could see her hands
+weaving music with the keys, and almost fancy he could hear it. The
+inventor bent over his machine, and plied the hammer, the chisel,
+and the file, on various parts of it. Now and then he would pause,
+stand erect, and look proudly toward his child, and keep time to
+her music with inclinations of his head. Bog, without knowing it,
+would do the same thing.</p>
+<p>While the boy was gloating over this scene, unconscious of the
+swift passage of time, the clock on the nearest church struck nine.
+Bog sighed, for he knew that that was Pet's hour for bed. Sure
+enough. Her little hands shut up the piano, and neatly smoothed
+down the cloth over it. Then she lit a candle, ran up to her father
+and kissed him, and in a moment was lost from Bog's sight in her
+chamber. As she disappeared, the boy's lips murmured "Good-night"
+with a fervor which made that simple colloquial phrase both a
+prayer and a blessing.</p>
+<p>When Pet had gone, Bog suddenly found that the night had become
+cold, and that he was beginning to shiver. So he shut the southeast
+window, and took a seat by the fire to warm himself before going
+home.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_FOURTH."></a>BOOK FOURTH.</h2>
+<h3>CHILDREN OF THE WORLD.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="D_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>MYNDERT VAN QUINTEM AND SON.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>One morning, when Marcus Wilkeson returned home from a ramble,
+he found his half-sister Philomela violently dusting the furniture
+and books of the snug little back parlor. The air was full of
+dancing motes, which looked large and suffocating in the sunshine.
+Marcus had politely requested his sister, fifty times at least,
+<i>not</i> to molest that sanctuary of meditation oftener than once
+a fortnight. To which she always replied: "I suppose you great lazy
+fellows would like to have the cobwebs grow on you. But you
+sha'n't, while I am in the house." Then, with a few dexterous
+flourishes of her cloth, she would start the dust up in a
+cloud.</p>
+<p>On this morning, Marcus Wilkeson, being in the most tolerant of
+moods, merely said "Whew!" and took a seat by his favorite window,
+the lower sash of which he threw wide open, with the vain hope that
+some of the dust would blow out. Miss Philomela smiled at this act
+so as to be seen by him. But he did not appear to notice it. Then
+she whisked her cloth under his very nose, as if to challenge
+objections. After this aggravation had been repeated three or four
+times, Marcus felt compelled to make a mild protest.</p>
+<p>"Great deal of dust, sister," he said, stating what he presumed
+would not be contradicted.</p>
+<p>"Is there?" replied Miss Philomela, exulting in the success of
+her stratagem. "<i>I</i> didn't notice it; nor would you, if you
+had some business to look after, like other people, instead of
+stopping in the house all day."</p>
+<p>Marcus had heard that argument and triumphantly put it down so
+often, that he did not think it worth another word. Consequently he
+said nothing.</p>
+<p>This obstinate silence galled Miss Philomela; and, after waiting
+full three minutes to see if Marcus would not answer, and meanwhile
+dusting prodigiously in his neighborhood, she said:</p>
+<p>"Well, it's some gratification to know that you do not have the
+hardihood to defend yourself. You are well aware that nothing can
+justify a healthy, middle-aged man--I may say, a young one--in
+retiring from active life and society, and becoming a great lazy
+mope."</p>
+<p>"I'm really too lazy to discuss it now," replied Marcus,
+smiling, and filling his meerschaum from the tobacco pouch which
+hung conveniently at the window's side.</p>
+<p>Philomela regarded him for a moment with an expression of pity
+and horror. Then she heaved a sigh, and muttered something about
+misapplied talents.</p>
+<p>"You had better say, 'Misapplied brooms and dusters,'" retorted
+her half-brother. "I should be perfectly happy now, but for this
+confounded dust."</p>
+<p>"Laugh away. I know you despise my sisterly advice. But you can
+never say that I have not done my duty--"</p>
+<p>"To the furniture, most assuredly," interrupted Marcus.</p>
+<p>Miss Philomela Wilkeson heaved another sigh in the best style of
+martyrdom, and precipitately left the room, followed by her
+brother's cheerful, rattling laugh.</p>
+<p>"A good old girl enough," said Marcus to himself, "but for her
+well-meaning and strictly conscientious habit of making people
+miserable."</p>
+<p>Then he lighted his meerschaum, closed the window, squared his
+chair in front of it, and looked out. His face instantly flushed
+with pleasure at a strange sight. The blinds of the lower parlor
+windows across the way, which had been shut for several weeks, were
+now thrown open, and the white-haired old gentleman, looking thin
+and pale, sat in his armchair in his old place, and was gazing at
+him. At least so Marcus thought; but he hesitated to bow until the
+old gentleman gave a distinct salutation. Marcus returned it two or
+three times with emphasis, as if to express his great pleasure at
+seeing his unknown neighbor and friend again. He blushed as he did
+so, for he was conscious of wilful neglect and cruel indifference,
+in not having called upon him on New Year's day, or since then,
+during the period of the closed blinds; and worse still, in not
+having thought of him a dozen times, though he had taken the
+trouble to pass his door on his way to or from Mr. Minford's, and
+had felt relieved to see no black crape on the bell-pull.</p>
+<p>"But then," thought Marcus, pleading with and for himself, "my
+mind has been occupied--very much occupied--- with other matters.
+Now, if he beckons to me again, I will go over to him without a
+moment's delay. My old friend looks very sick and unhappy."</p>
+<p>Just then the old gentleman reached out his thin white hand, as
+if the motion required an effort, and beckoned twice. Marcus
+answered with two bows, and immediately rose, and laid down his
+pipe on the window sill, thereby implying that he would come over
+at once. The old gentleman smiled faintly, to express his
+delight.</p>
+<p>In a few minutes Marcus Wilkeson stood at the antique mansion,
+and pulled the bell. It vibrated feebly as if it shared with the
+house and its owner the infirmities of age. The bell was answered
+by an old, neatly dressed female servant. She had been told to
+admit the caller instantly, and said, "Mr. Van Quintem will see
+you, sir."</p>
+<p>He entered a wide hallway, and followed the noiseless step of
+the servant, trying to remember, without success, where he had
+heard the name of Van Quintem.</p>
+<p>At the end of the hall the servant opened a door, and ushered
+him into a room decorated at the edges of the ceiling with heavy
+wooden carvings, and furnished in the style of the last century.
+The old gentleman partly rose from his soft armchair, supported
+himself by one hand on it, and extended the other to his
+visitor.</p>
+<p>"My name is Myndert Van Quintem, sir," said he, "and I am very
+glad to see you." There was a pleasant smile in the old gentleman's
+pale face, and a warmth in the grasp of his thin right hand, that
+attested the sincerity of his words.</p>
+<p>"And my name is Marcus Wilkeson, sir; and I am truly happy to
+make your acquaintance," responded the visitor, in his most genial
+manner.</p>
+<p>The old gentleman here showed symptoms of faintness from the
+exertion of standing; and Marcus, taking him by the arm, forced him
+gently into his easy chair, and took a seat beside him.</p>
+<p>"I must apologize for not having called before," said Marcus.
+"I--"</p>
+<p>"Not a word, sir," interrupted the old gentleman. "It is I who
+must apologize for the rudeness of nodding and beckoning to a
+perfect stranger. But the fact was, I could not regard you as a
+stranger. Seeing you at your window, smoking and reading, day after
+day, while I was smoking and musing at mine, I gradually came to
+sympathize with you, and to wish that the distance across the lots
+was short enough to allow us to converse. I thought, perhaps, that
+on some subjects we might interest each other. Now, be good enough
+to fill that pipe and smoke it, while I tell you in few words who I
+am."</p>
+<p>He pointed to a meerschaum, carved into the semblance of a
+Dutchman's head, which looked not unlike his own. It was fitted to
+a long Turkish stem, and hung against the wall by a silver chain,
+within reach of his hand. Five other pipes of quaint design hung
+near it.</p>
+<p>Marcus protested against smoking in an invalid's presence; but
+the old gentleman insisted upon it, and playfully but firmly
+threatened to smoke the pipe himself if his guest did not. So
+Marcus filled the large bowl from a paper of old, mild tobacco,
+which hung in a pouch near it, and drew a few gentle whiffs,
+intending to let the pipe go out. But the old gentleman watched
+him.</p>
+<p>"'Twon't do," said he. "That old pipe of mine is not used to
+neglect. As a particular favor, now, I beg that you'll smoke, and
+puff out clouds, as I have often seen you do across the way."</p>
+<p>Marcus protested again, but the old gentleman stubbornly
+maintained his point; and it was not till the pungent smoke began
+to curl upward, that he proceeded with his personal disclosure.</p>
+<p>"Have you ever heard my name before, Mr. Wilkeson?" said he.</p>
+<p>Marcus bowed, and said that he had not had that pleasure.</p>
+<p>"Of course not," returned the old gentleman, not displeased with
+the answer. "I have taken infinite pains to keep out of public life
+since I retired from business, twenty-five years ago. Even before
+that time, I was known only to a very few persons as a silent
+partner in the large iron-importing house of Sniggs, Buffet &amp;
+Co. I had no relations, and few friends, in the common acceptance
+of that much-abused word. My only happiness was in my wife--that is
+her picture hanging over the mantelpiece--and this house, which my
+father built, and which, according to a tradition in our family, is
+on or near the spot where my great-great-grandfather, the fourth
+Myndert Van Quintem, perished by the hands of the Indians."</p>
+<p>"Then," interrupted Marcus, "you belong to an old Dutch
+family?"</p>
+<p>"To one of the oldest on record," replied Mr. Van Quintem. "My
+great ancestor, the genuine original Myndert, came over as cook
+with Hendrik Hudson. We have an iron spoon of doubtful
+authenticity, said to have descended from him. Sometimes I have
+paid the penalty of this ancient and distinguished origin, by
+receiving stupid compliments on my old Dutch blood, as if that
+species of blood were better than any other. That sort of nonsense
+I have always answered by informing the flatterer that the first
+bearer of my venerable name was a cook; the second, a tanner; the
+third--well, the least said about the third the better; and the
+fourth, a barber. My grandfather, a very worthy saddler, in old
+Queen's street, was the first of the series that was ever able to
+buy and hold real estate. My father increased upon his purchases,
+and, when the property came into my possession, I, in turn, added
+to its extent as fast as I could. In forty years, this property has
+become valuable; and I now find myself and my lots occupying a
+large space on the tax rolls.</p>
+<p>"It is a curious fact, and illustrates the uncertainty of human
+events, that my success is the result of accident, and is not in
+the least due to my judgment or foresight. Every kind of business
+that I have engaged in--and I have tried several kinds--has failed.
+Sniggs, Buffet &amp; Co. almost finished me; and, if I had not
+backed out as I did, the better part of my estate would have been
+sacrificed. Among those who know me, I pass for a very shrewd
+business man, who has made a fortune by his numerous failures. This
+tribute to my abilities is flattering, but I must disclaim it. But
+I am tiring you with these petty details of my life."</p>
+<p>"Not at all, really," said Marcus Wilkeson, who enjoyed the old
+gentleman's frankness.</p>
+<p>Mr. Van Quintem paused, and began to show signs of fatigue. He
+asked for a cordial which stood on an old sideboard with great
+lion's feet, near his visitor's chair. Having sipped of its
+contents, he expressed himself relieved, and resumed his story:</p>
+<p>"As I was saying, I found my whole happiness in my wife, and in
+this house. With the exception of a few friends of my youth--now
+all dead--she was my only society. Like me, she was fond of
+retirement and of books. You, sir, can appreciate the quiet,
+satisfying pleasure which we derived from books, for you, too, are
+a constant, happy reader; and you have fine books, as I know by the
+size of them. You see, I have been observing you closely," he
+added, with a smile. The old gentleman's smile was sweet, but
+relapsed into a mild expression of sadness.</p>
+<p>"Not more closely than I have observed you," said Marcus. "I
+have often wondered what stout old quartos you were reading. To
+tell you the truth, I inferred, from the dimensions of the books
+and your white cravat, that you were a clergyman." Marcus might
+have added, that the old gentleman's flowing white locks and
+benevolent features had contributed to the illusion; but he had
+already discovered that Mr. Van Quintem, like himself, was averse
+to compliments.</p>
+<p>The old gentleman took the remark good-naturedly. "This is not
+the first time," said he, "that my old-fashioned fancy for a white
+cravat has led to that mistake. You will find very little of the
+body of divinity in that library. When I recover from this illness
+so as to hobble about, we will look over my little collection
+together."</p>
+<p>Marcus said that nothing could give him greater delight, unless
+it was to show his friend his own humble library.</p>
+<p>"Thank you," returned Mr. Van Quintem; "and I promise to run
+over and look at it when I am well enough to go out." The haste
+with which the old gentleman made the last remark, and the fact
+that he did not invite his visitor to examine the library then and
+there, led Marcus to think that the old gentleman had some private
+trouble on his mind, which he wished to diminish by imparting to
+another. Marcus was right.</p>
+<p>The old gentleman heaved a sigh, and resumed:</p>
+<p>"For ten years after my retirement, my wife and I lived on in
+the calm, happy manner that I have described. We had no griefs--not
+even that one which most commonly afflicts parents, the loss of
+children. Yet I sometimes think, sir, that it would be far better
+for some children to die in their youth and innocence, than to grow
+up and become bad men, and torture and almost kill their parents
+with ingratitude and unkindness." Marcus guessed what was to
+come.</p>
+<p>"We had but one child--a boy--born long after I had given up all
+hopes of having an heir. I need not tell you, sir, what a joy he
+was to us in his infancy; for you, too, I presume, are a husband
+and a father."</p>
+<p>Marcus replied confusedly, and as if it were something to be
+ashamed of, that he was neither the one nor the other, though he
+hoped some day (here he was exceedingly awkward) to be both.</p>
+<p>The old gentleman was so wrapped up in his own thoughts, that he
+did not seem to notice the reply. He again braced himself in the
+chair, as if he would, by that act, gather strength to proceed.</p>
+<p>"Of course, I called the child Myndert. He was the seventh of
+that name; and I used to think, even when he was a toddling little
+baby, what plans of education would be best suited to develop his
+talents. I know that a parent's partiality is a magnifying glass of
+high power; but, to the best of my belief, he was a most precocious
+child. I think so now, as I look back upon the days of his
+prattling innocence.</p>
+<p>"After a great deal of debating, my wife and I concluded to make
+a lawyer of him. He was to be the first lawyer in our family
+annals; and we fondly pictured to ourselves that he would become an
+eminent judge, or that he would step from the bar into political
+life, and shed honor upon his country and his family as a
+statesman. I know how ridiculous these imaginings must seem to you,
+and I recall them only to show you how deeply our hearts were
+wrapped up in that boy.</p>
+<p>"When our little Myndert was five years old, my wife died." Here
+the old gentleman clutched the arms of the chair firmly with both
+hands. "Our son had been very sick for a week before, and my dear
+Clara had nearly worn herself out watching over and nursing him. A
+severe cold, which she caught while going to the druggist's in a
+rain, did the rest. She died with one arm around me and the other
+around little Myndert; and her last words were a blessing on the
+boy, and a request that I would always love him for her sake." The
+old gentleman's eyes glistened with tears, and his lips twitched
+convulsively. Marcus evinced his sympathy in the fittest way, by
+keeping silence, and fixing his eyes on the floor.</p>
+<p>"Well, sir, not to be tedious, I lavished my whole heart upon
+that child. His presence seemed to be some consolation for the
+great loss I had sustained. His features were so like hers, in all
+except the eyes, that I seemed to see her through him; and thus, in
+a peculiar sense, I loved him for her sake, indeed. He was petted
+and caressed from his very cradle. Ah, there was my error; but who
+can blame a father for over-loving his only son, and that one
+motherless!</p>
+<p>"He early showed indications of a fierce temper and a sullen
+pride, in which respects he resembled not his mother, but her
+father, who, with the exception of these two faults, was a good and
+just man. I have heard of cases in which strong mental traits jump
+over a generation, and appear in the next one. I thought, and still
+think, that my son's singular peculiarities might be explained in
+that way. If you will bear with me, sir, I will give you some
+illustrations of his character.</p>
+<p>"When he was nine years of age, a dear friend, now dead, advised
+me not to injure so precocious an intellect by too much
+cultivation, but to put the boy on a farm, where he could divide
+his time between healthful work and youthful sports, and would be
+kept away from the contaminating influences of the city, I agreed
+to make the experiment, though reluctantly, for I could not bear
+the thought of parting with my child. An old family acquaintance
+who owned a farm in Dutchess County, and had no children, was
+willing to take my boy.</p>
+<p>"Little Myndert liked the idea of going into the country, and
+for two weeks he behaved very well; and his acting father wrote me,
+that if I could spare the boy, he would like to adopt him as his
+own. But the next letter, a week afterward, brought a different
+story. It was while Myndert was not put to work, that he behaved so
+well. But when the farmer gave him a little hoe, and asked him to
+grub up a few weeds in the garden, the lad threw it down, and said
+to the farmer, 'I hate you.' This was his favorite expression to
+those who aroused his displeasure when a child. The good man was
+astonished at this insubordination, and tried to persuade Myndert
+to do as he was told. But persuasion was useless; and so were the
+threats with which the farmer tried to frighten him. As for
+whipping the boy, he was, like me, too soft-hearted to do that.</p>
+<p>"So Myndert became the master there, as he had been here. His
+real nature now came out. From that time until the worthy farmer
+sent the boy home in despair--ten weeks later--he was the wonder
+and terror of the neighborhood. Chickens, goslings, and young ducks
+were killed; boughs of apple trees and other fruit trees were
+broken down; strawberry beds were entered, and the plants pulled up
+by the roots; the windows of the village church and schoolhouse
+were broken with stones; and three fourths of these acts were
+traced to little Myndert. He always denied the charges, and put on
+an air of innocence, which deceived many persons.</p>
+<p>"The cunning which he exhibited in doing these malicious acts,
+and trying to divert suspicion from himself, was truly wonderful in
+a child of his age. One day he was caught by a farmer in the act of
+killing some young chickens; and the owner was so mad, that he
+whipped the boy soundly. That very night the farmer's wood shed was
+set on fire from the outside; but a heavy rain came on, and put out
+the flames. The traces of the fire were plainly to be seen next
+morning; and the farmer found proofs enough, I fear, to have
+convicted my son of a felony.</p>
+<p>"My friend informed me of all these facts in a very sorrowful
+letter, and I hastened to take my son once more under my own
+roof.</p>
+<p>"Here I tried every method that a father's love could devise to
+reform him. But all was useless. He seemed to have no idea of truth
+or honor, of affection or duty to me. When, at times, I thought he
+was showing signs of improvement, I always found, afterward, that
+he was only concealing his mischievous acts more carefully. I call
+them mischievous, though the word 'malicious' would perhaps
+describe them better; for they were all undertaken in a spirit of
+evil, and not of fun." The old gentleman here rested, and refreshed
+himself with a sip of the cordial.</p>
+<p>"But it would take days to tell you of all my troubles with that
+boy, and I will briefly refer to the rest of them.</p>
+<p>"By the advice of another friend (for I have never taken any
+step in the treatment of my child without first seeking for
+friendly advice), I sent him, when twelve years of age, to a
+celebrated school in Massachusetts, where the discipline is very
+strict. I had a personal interview with the master, and requested
+him, as a favor, to chastise Myndert, if all other means failed to
+subdue him. Though I could not bear to whip him, I was willing that
+he should suffer a proper punishment, inflicted in the right
+spirit, from others. At this school he conducted himself properly
+for about three weeks, and was taking a high rank as a scholar,
+when his natural tastes asserted themselves, in all sorts of wicked
+pranks on his fellow pupils, on the teachers, and on people in the
+village. The master at first expostulated, and then gave Myndert a
+good thrashing. That night the master narrowly escaped being hit by
+a large stone thrown through his bedroom window. Next morning my
+son was missing, and for three weeks no trace of him could be
+found. I advertised in newspapers, describing him, and offering
+large rewards for his recovery. I had the same notice printed on
+bills, and stuck up all through the country. I employed detectives
+to trace out the runaway. A month passed, and no tidings. I was in
+despair. Toward the close of the fifth week, one of the detectives
+struck a trail on Cape Cod, and, after a patient search, found the
+young rascal living, under the assumed name of Carlo, with a
+fisherman, in a little seaside hamlet. As the fishing season was a
+good one, and men were scarce, the fisherman had gladly received my
+son as an apprentice for his board. The novelty, excitement, and
+sometimes danger of the pursuit pleased Myndert greatly, and the
+old fisherman said that he was a good hand for a boy. When the
+detective found him, however, he was beginning to be tired of his
+strange occupation (nothing pleases him long), and he consented to
+come home on condition that I would not scold him, and would give
+him plenty of pocket money. I had been weak enough to authorize the
+making of these promises.</p>
+<p>"The return of my prodigal son made me happy. As I had promised,
+I did not reproach him, and gave him all the money that he wished.
+He was not old enough to know how to spend money viciously. His
+tastes, though costly, were comparatively innocent. From childhood
+he had always been very fond of new clothes, and he indulged that
+passion to the utmost. At twelve years of age, he was called the
+'Young Dandy' all through this part of the town; and I sometimes
+heard of his attracting attention on Broadway.</p>
+<p>"He was so well satisfied with my generosity, that he consented
+to receive two short lessons daily from tutors at the house, and
+surprised them, as he did everybody, with his wonderful aptitude
+for learning."</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="D_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>BUYING GOOD BEHAVIOR.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>"For three years I bought my son's good behavior with unlimited
+pocket money, and foolishly thought that his nature had changed.
+Occasionally he would do malicious acts to his tutors, or to my
+housekeeper or servants; but these occurred less frequently as time
+rolled on, and at last ceased. At fifteen years of age, he was
+sufficiently advanced in learning to pass a college examination,
+and I determined to send him to college. He was delighted at the
+proposal, for he had begun now to appreciate the advantages of
+education. Anticipating that he would have trouble with the
+Faculty, I selected a college which was distinguished for its means
+of learning, and was jet very lenient in its discipline. Myndert
+easily obtained admission, and at once took high rank in his class.
+Knowledge came so easy to him, that he had plenty of leisure, and I
+feared that his old vicious habits would break out again. Greatly
+did I rejoice not to hear a single complaint of him during his
+first term. But, alas! I found, when he returned home, that he had
+learned to drink and gamble, and that the large sums of money I had
+sent him had been squandered in carousals, and over the card table.
+Still he maintained the first position in his class, and of that I
+was proud.</p>
+<p>"I remonstrated against his vices. He admitted that there was
+some truth in what I had heard, mixed up with a great deal of
+exaggeration; and justified his conduct by saying that it was the
+fashion, and he could not keep out of it if he would. His good
+health and naturally high spirits did not appear to be in the least
+affected by dissipation, and I gladly allowed myself to believe
+that many of the reports about him were false.</p>
+<p>"The next term was still more expensive; and I found out that
+the larger portion of my heavy outlay went for liquor and gambling.
+Still he kept a high grade in his class--taking the second rank
+instead of the first; and the Faculty either were ignorant of his
+misconduct, or did not think it worth punishing. Through his first,
+second, and third years at college, these were his only vices. His
+constitution, though strong, was gradually undermined; and, at the
+end of his junior year, he showed unmistakable signs of bloating,
+became very irregular in his attendance on recitations, and had
+sunk to be the fifteenth in his class. I had hopes that he would
+pass through his fourth year safely, and get a diploma. But, at the
+very beginning of that year, he kept drunk, and absented himself
+from recitations for a fortnight, and, when called before the
+Faculty for a mild reprimand, cursed them with the most horrible
+oaths, defied them, and left their presence. They had no choice but
+to expel him from the college; and, a week after, he was brought
+home to me nearly dead with intoxication.</p>
+<p>"A month's illness followed, which brought him almost to the
+grave. Though, at the time, I prayed with all a father's love for
+his recovery, I have since thought--- oh, how often!--that it would
+have been far better for him to have died. But he was spared; and,
+having been thoroughly frightened by his narrow escape from the
+effects of drunkenness, he vowed, on his recovery, that he would
+never touch another drop of liquor. This pledge he kept for some
+months after his health was fully restored.</p>
+<p>"Having decided to educate him for the law--the only profession
+that he did not hold in contempt--I procured a place for him in the
+office of Mulroy, Biggup &amp; Lartimore, an excellent firm with
+whom I had had some dealings.</p>
+<p>"Myndert entered upon his study of the profession with such
+ardor, that I was obliged to caution him against ruining his
+health. But he only laughed, and said he wanted to make up for past
+follies. I had never before seen him in a penitent mood, and I was
+delighted. Mr. Mulroy, who has had a hundred pupils in his time,
+told me that he never had a more promising one than Myndert. He was
+a regular and constant attendant at the office, and spent all his
+evenings at home. The natural strength of his constitution came to
+his aid, as if to encourage him in his efforts to reform; and,
+notwithstanding his severe studies, he began to look in better
+health than he had ever been. Thus things went on six whole weeks,
+and I was happy, and busied myself in framing plans for my son's
+advancement in life.</p>
+<p>"He told me, one day, that he had joined a club of young law
+students, who met every evening and discussed legal points, held
+mock courts, and thus sought to familiarize themselves with the
+duties of their profession; and asked me if I approved of it. He
+sought my approval so rarely for anything, that I freely gave it,
+cautioning him again, however, to be careful of his health. He
+laughed at my apprehensions. But I was pained to see how soon my
+fears proved true. Within a fortnight, the rosy color of his cheeks
+had disappeared, and his eyes were palpably sunken, dull, and
+marked with a sickly blue beneath. He never returned home till
+midnight, and sometimes was out till three o'clock in the morning.
+I scolded him for devoting so much time to his law club; but he
+said that the members were, like himself, enthusiastic students,
+and that he was always the first to leave their fascinating debates
+and mimic trials. A week later, I marked the familiar bloat in his
+cheeks, and suspected the truth.</p>
+<p>"Placing a watch upon his movements--no easy matter, for he is
+very shrewd and cautious--I soon found out that the law club was a
+myth, and that his nights were passed in the wildest debauchery. He
+had not only resumed all his old vices, but had acquired new
+ones.</p>
+<p>"When I reproved him, as I did with just indignation, he threw
+off the mask of concealment, which he said he was tired of wearing,
+and became the same bold, defiant, reckless boy that he always was;
+while I continued to be the same weak, foolish, fond parent. I
+cannot recount the tortures inflicted upon me by my son since that
+fatal discovery. He has not only abandoned all his law studies
+(having been expelled from the office of Mulroy, Biggup &amp;
+Lartimore for grossly insulting a young female client), and utterly
+ruined his own body and soul, but, by his acts, he has brought
+shame upon several families.</p>
+<p>"When this new series of outrages came to my knowledge, I
+threatened to disinherit him. He laughed at me. He knew how I loved
+him for his mother's sake, and, with that hold upon my affections,
+he defied me.</p>
+<p>"To heartless indifference he gradually added insults, and often
+cursed me, his own father, in this very room, where his mother has
+rocked his cradle a thousand times while she listened to my reading
+of an old poem or novel. The last of his crimes of which I have
+heard, was brought to my knowledge about six weeks ago. It was a
+piece of treachery the most villanous, and I told my son, in plain
+words, what I thought of it. I was weak and nervous from an illness
+which is hereditary in my family, and I reprimanded him with more
+severity than usual. I told him, that if God, in His infinite
+mercy, spared him, yet he was not secure from just punishment from
+the friends of those whom he had wronged, and that the human
+vengeance, which had been so long postponed, would surely come. He
+looked at me with malice in his small gray eyes (not his mother's
+eyes), and, when I ceased speaking, raised both hands to heaven,
+and, with the most horrible blasphemy, called down its curses upon
+me; and then he swore, that if I crossed his path, or thwarted his
+plans, or refused him money, he would kill me.</p>
+<p>"Just before he uttered this monstrous threat, I sprang from my
+chair with horror, and caught him imploringly by both hands. I
+would have saved him from that dreadful act, but I was too late. I
+saw him wrench away his right hand, and raise it to strike me
+back.... I knew no more, until Mrs. Frump, my niece, who has had
+charge of my household during the past three years, entered the
+room, and found me stretched insensible on the floor."</p>
+<p>"I saw a part of the sad scene," said Marcus Wilkeson, who had
+listened with mingled indignation and compassion to this strange
+tale. "Your son was standing by that window, and you were sitting
+near him, also within sight of me. I distinctly saw you catch your
+son's hands with your own; he wrenched the right one away, and
+raised it; then you fell, but he did not strike you, or attempt to.
+As you dropped to the floor, he glanced anxiously through the
+window, saw me watching him, and then pulled down the curtain."</p>
+<p>"Then he did not strike me to the floor! I never believed he
+did, for there was no bruise or other mark upon my head. Thank God,
+my son was spared the commission of that crime! Bad as he is, he
+would not strike his own father." And the poor old gentleman's
+heart found meagre comfort, for a moment, in that thought.</p>
+<p>"A few words more, and I am done. The shock brought my disease
+to a crisis. For over a month my recovery was doubtful. But my
+naturally tough constitution, skilful medical attendance, and the
+unceasing care of Mrs. Frump, brought me safely out of it. The
+devotion of that good, light-hearted woman was truly affecting. She
+never left my bedside, night or day, except for a few hours' rest;
+and even to-day, when, as you see, I am well enough to sit up and
+talk, and, in fact, am perfectly restored to health, it was only by
+almost pushing her into the street that I could get her to go out
+for a day's shopping--a luxury which the good soul had denied to
+herself during all my illness."</p>
+<p>("I must tell Maltboy about this excellent woman," thought
+Marcus,)</p>
+<p>"My son did not come near my sickbed, and I have not seen him
+since that unhappy day. He has visited the house daily, and shut
+himself in his room for several hours. How he occupies his time, I
+cannot imagine, but am sure that it is only in studying or
+practising evil."</p>
+<p>"Possibly I may throw some light on that mystery," said Marcus.
+"I have seen him, from my convenient window, enter his room, day
+after day, generally in the afternoon, sit down at his table, and
+write for over an hour steadily."</p>
+<p>"That is strange!" exclaimed the old gentleman. "He has given up
+the study of law. He has no taste for literary labor. He writes a
+beautiful hand, and would not waste time in trying to improve his
+penmanship. It is singular, indeed."</p>
+<p>"His work, whatever it is, does not seem to satisfy him; for I
+have observed that he no sooner fills a page with writing, than he
+burns it to ashes by the gas jet, which he always keeps faintly
+lighted above his head."</p>
+<p>"Some more villany, I am sure," said the old gentleman, with a
+deep sigh. "We shall find it out by its terrible consequences, in
+due time. He has plenty of leisure to cultivate his vices, but not
+a moment to seek my forgiveness (which, God knows, I would freely
+grant, if he would only ask it). He cannot even throw away a word
+upon Mrs. Frump, to find out whether his own father is dead or
+alive."</p>
+<p>The last thought gave acute pain to the wretched parent. Tears
+again sprang to his eyes, and Marcus feared that he was about to
+witness that saddest sight in nature--an old man weeping.</p>
+<p>But, by an effort, Mr. Van Quintem stifled his emotion, and,
+turning suddenly upon his visitor, cried, in a voice of
+despair:</p>
+<p>"Tell me, sir, in Heaven's name, what <i>shall I</i> do with my
+son?"</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="D_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>THE YOUNG MONSTER.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>From boyhood, it had been Marcus Wilkeson's fortune (or the
+reverse) to attract confidence, and to be sought out for advice.
+And it had most generally happened that he was requested to bestow
+the last valuable article in cases where inexperience absolutely
+disqualified him from giving it.</p>
+<p>He had found, however, that, when people ask for advice, they
+expect to receive it, although they reserve to themselves the
+right, and, in ninety-nine cases out of a hundred, exercise the
+privilege, of rejecting it.</p>
+<p>But Marcus had gathered, from the old gentleman's story, that
+the error of his dealings with the rebellious son lay in his
+constantly seeking advice from everybody, and taking it, too,
+instead of adopting some firm, consistent, and independent course
+of his own toward that unfilial monster. Furthermore, Marcus knew
+that the son was already beyond the reach of reform. For the future
+peace of his venerable friend, and for the good of society, he
+could have conscientiously recommended two things:</p>
+<p>First, the immediate hanging of Myndert Van Quintem, jr. Second,
+his imprisonment for life in a penitentiary warranted to be strong
+enough to hold him.</p>
+<p>Neither of these courses being practicable until that young man
+had entitled himself to the benefit of one or the other of them in
+the legitimate way, Marcus Wilkeson had nothing to offer, and so he
+told the old gentleman.</p>
+<p>Mr. Van Quintem was disappointed. He looked up wistfully, and
+said:</p>
+<p>"Can't you suggest something?"</p>
+<p>Thus appealed to, Marcus angled in the deep waters of his mind,
+and fished up this inadequate idea:</p>
+<p>"Let him travel a couple of years in Europe."</p>
+<p>"I have proposed it," returned the old gentleman, "but he won't,
+unless I give him five thousand dollars, and an unlimited letter of
+credit. This I refused. Besides, to tell the truth, I do not wish
+to exile the boy, but to reform him at home."</p>
+<p>Marcus was too polite to say bluntly that that was impossible;
+so he cast in his line again at random, and drew out this worthless
+suggestion:</p>
+<p>"Stop all his pocket money, and tell him plainly that you will
+disinherit him unless he reforms."</p>
+<p>"My dear sir," replied the old gentleman, "that might do with
+some sons, but not with mine. He would obtain money by theft, or
+even a worse crime, and bring disgrace upon my gray hairs. He might
+go even farther--for he has threatened it, as I told you--and
+murder me in revenge. Besides, he is on short allowance now. I give
+him only thirty dollars a week--less than a quarter of what he used
+to receive from me. Much as his conduct deserves punishment, I
+could not reduce him to beggary, you know."</p>
+<p>This useless discussion was cut short by the precipitate
+entrance of the subject of it. Mr. Van Quintem was greatly
+surprised at the sudden apparition, and his face exhibited signs
+first of astonishment, then of indignation, then of pleasure, in
+quick succession. But before his erring son Had advanced halfway
+toward the father's chair, the father turned his head slightly
+away, as if not daring to trust himself to an interview.</p>
+<p>The son took one sharp survey of Marcus, and then slipped his
+right hand insinuatingly in that of his father, which hung over an
+arm of the easy chair. Mr. Van Quintem turned his face farther
+away, but Marcus observed that his fingers closed upon the hand
+which lay within them.</p>
+<p>"Are you quite well, my dear father?" asked the son, in a low,
+hollow voice, not meant to be overheard by the visitor.</p>
+<p>"I am, thanks to God, and the doctor, and my niece," said the
+father, stealing a side look at his son.</p>
+<p>"And no thanks to me, I know that. I feared, my dear father,
+after what had occurred, that you could not bear the sight of me.
+Therefore I kept away from your bedside."</p>
+<p>"That is a lame excuse, Myndert," replied the father. He spoke
+in a voice intended to be audible to Marcus Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>A gleam in the son's sunken eyes, and a new pallor on his
+bloated cheeks, indicated his displeasure at the turn which this
+conversation was taking. He withdrew his hand, and said, in a deep
+whisper:</p>
+<p>"I did not think you would quarrel with me, when I called to
+congratulate you on your recovery."</p>
+<p>Mr. Van Quintem wavered a moment. Then, looking at the calm face
+of Marcus Wilkeson, as if to gather strength from it, he
+replied:</p>
+<p>"My son, such language is not respectful to your father. You
+know, as God knows, that I have been too indulgent with you."</p>
+<p>The son coolly twirled the ends of his mustache--which protruded
+from each side of his mouth like the antennae of a catfish--and
+gazed impudently in his father's face. Then he turned about, and
+bestowed another scornful, analyzing look on the tranquil
+Marcus.</p>
+<p>"That is a friend of mine, Myndert, and I have no secrets from
+him. Mr. Wilkeson--my son."</p>
+<p>Marcus politely rose, and offered his hand to the young man, who
+accepted it reluctantly.</p>
+<p>"I have seen you before, I believe," said he. "Across the way,
+eh?"</p>
+<p>"I dare say," was the reply. "I sometimes sit at the window,
+reading."</p>
+<p>Myndert then abruptly faced his fatherland Marcus resumed his
+chair.</p>
+<p>"Since you have no secrets from this gentleman," said the son,
+"allow me to ask if you could conveniently spare five hundred
+dollars this morning?"</p>
+<p>The old gentleman hesitated; then reassured himself by an
+observation of Marcus Wilkeson's face, and said:</p>
+<p>"No, my son; I can no longer encourage this extravagance. Where
+is your last monthly allowance?"</p>
+<p>"Gone, of course," answered the son, in a loud and insolent
+tone. "Do you expect to keep me on miserable driblets like
+that?"</p>
+<p>"Thirty dollars a week, and board and lodging, are enough for
+any reasonable young man, Myndert. I cannot give you more."</p>
+<p>The son glared on his father and Marcus Wilkeson (holding the
+latter chiefly responsible for the refusal) with amazement.</p>
+<p>"Since you are obstinate, then, make it three hundred." The son
+had often been able to obtain half or two thirds of what he
+originally asked, as a compromise.</p>
+<p>Again the old gentleman wavered; and it was not until he had
+looked Marcus Wilkeson straight in the eye, that he answered,
+striking the arm of the chair with his thin white hand:</p>
+<p>"Not one cent!"</p>
+<p>The tumid cheeks assumed a sicklier white, and the small,
+offensive eyes sparkled with a fiercer fury, as the son
+replied:</p>
+<p>"Very well, sir. Be as stingy as you please. Take the advice of
+your new friend here, and cut off my beggarly monthly allowance,
+too. But remember, I must have money, and I will have it!"</p>
+<p>Had Marcus Wilkeson not been present, the father might have been
+brought to terms by this vague but dreadful threat. But now he
+shook his head, as an intimation that nothing could move him.</p>
+<p>"You have taken your own course, sir," continued the son,
+through his closed teeth. "I shall take mine. Don't forget my last
+words. As for you, sir," turning to Marcus Wilkeson, "we shall
+probably meet again."</p>
+<p>Marcus urbanely responded that nothing could give him greater
+pleasure. The son, darting a last malignant look at his father,
+whose face was happily averted, strode out of the room, slamming
+the door, and afterward the street door, with increased
+emphasis.</p>
+<p>When he had gone, the father said to his visitor, feebly:</p>
+<p>"Have I done right?"</p>
+<p>"Precisely. Your conduct was firm, prudent, and will have a good
+effect."</p>
+<p>"I hope so--I hope so. But don't you think, now, I was a little
+too severe--to begin with, I mean? I fear that my son will be
+driven to crime; and that would kill me."</p>
+<p>"I regard his threats as only empty words," replied Marcus. He
+has found them useful heretofore, and he tries them now. Having
+learned that they do not longer frighten you, he will never employ
+them again. That is one point gained. If he is really bad enough to
+commit a crime for money, your misjudged kindness will not prevent
+him, but will rather encourage his evil disposition."</p>
+<p>"There is truth in what you say," replied the old gentleman,
+faintly; "but I--I--fear."</p>
+<p>The protracted conversation, and the suppressed agony of the
+past few minutes, were too much for the old gentleman to bear on
+his first day of convalescence. He suddenly turned very pale, and
+his head drooped. Marcus threw open a window, and held the cordial
+to his lips. As Marcus was applying this restorative, without any
+perceptible benefit, the door opened, and Mrs. Frump ran in, red in
+the face, and quite out of breath.</p>
+<p>"Excuse me, sir. I am Mrs. Frump, Mr. Van Quintem's niece."</p>
+<p>"I am Mr. Wilkeson, a friend of Mr. Van Quintem," said Marcus,
+hastily introducing himself; "and I am glad you are come."</p>
+<p>"Yes, I see. Fainted away. Revive in a moment. Fresh air.
+Cordial, Quite right. Now a little water on his forehead."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Frump made her sentences short, to accommodate her
+breath.</p>
+<p>As she passed a cool sponge across the patient's brow, she
+said:</p>
+<p>"I knew it would be so. He has been here. I saw him round the
+corner. Looking pale and mad."</p>
+<p>"You are right, madam. He <i>has</i> been here."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Frump's pleasant little eyes shone with unnatural anger,
+and there was a presage of wrathful words in her quivering lips.
+Mrs. Frump was desperately trying to keep back certain private
+opinions that she had long entertained, but proved unequal to the
+effort. She burst out with:</p>
+<p>"He's an undutiful son, sir. A monster, sir. And he's killing
+his poor father. He's--"</p>
+<p>"Ah! what?" said Mr. Van Quintem, opening his eyes, and looking
+wildly around, like one who wakes from a horrible dream.</p>
+<p>"It's I. Your niece--Gusty," replied Mrs. Frump, changing her
+assumed harsh tones into her natural soft ones "And I think you had
+better go to bed. Please take hold, Mr. Wilkeson, and assist him to
+the next room." She added, in a whisper, "Don't talk with him any
+more to-day."</p>
+<p>Mr. Wilkeson nodded, raised his eyebrows to signify that he
+appreciated the advice, and proceeded at once to aid Mrs. Frump in
+her benevolent task. The old gentleman had considerably revived by
+this time.</p>
+<p>"You are right, my dear Gusty," said he, looking fondly at his
+niece. "You are always right. And you are right, too, sir," he
+added, turning to Marcus. "Ah, if I had known such a good adviser
+years ago."</p>
+<p>Marcus, remembering Mrs. Frump's injunction, made no answer to
+this remark.</p>
+<p>When the old gentleman had been led tottering into the adjacent
+parlor, which was fitted up as his bedroom, and placed comfortably
+on a high prop of pillows, Marcus drew out his watch, made an
+amiable pretence of very important business down town, and bade his
+venerable friend "good-by."</p>
+<p>"I had hoped you could stay longer; for I feel that you are a
+true friend, and I can confide my sorrows to you," murmured the old
+gentleman, taking his guest fondly by the hand.</p>
+<p>But Marcus, fortified by another significant look from Mrs.
+Frump, declared that business was imperative, and he must go. He
+would call to-morrow, without fail, and hoped to find his friend as
+cheerful as a cricket. The old gentleman smiled at the absurdity of
+that hope, and said he should depend on seeing him to-morrow.</p>
+<p>So, shaking hands warmly with Mr. Van Quintem, and bowing most
+respectfully to Mrs. Frump, Marcus took his departure, and
+meditated, as he walked slowly home, on the strange occurrences of
+the day.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="D_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>WESLEY TIFFLES.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>One evening, shortly after the events narrated in the last
+chapter, the three bachelors, having finished dinner, and escaped
+from the grim presence of Miss Philomela Wilkeson, took their
+accustomed seats and pipes in the little back parlor. The curtains
+were drawn, the gas was lighted, the fire burning brightly, and,
+upon these outward tokens of cheer, the three bachelors reflected
+contentment and happiness from their six eyes. In his own opinion,
+each of the three had unlimited cause to be happy; and not even
+that killjoy of the household, Miss Wilkeson, could mar the
+completeness of their felicity--when she was not present.</p>
+<p>Fayette Overtop was blessed with the thought, that in Mrs.
+Slapman he had found, at last, that rare bird for which he had
+patiently hunted through the valleys and uplands of society--"a
+sensible woman." The intellectual sympathy which was enkindled
+between them on the memorable occasion of their first meeting, had
+grown warmer at each successive interview--first at a supper party,
+second at a <i>conversazione</i>, and third at a private theatrical
+and musical entertainment, to all of which Mr. Overtop had been
+invited, with the particular compliments of the liberal
+hostess.</p>
+<p>During this pleasant acquaintance, Mr. Overtop had made the
+extraordinary discovery that Mrs. Slapman was married, and that the
+thin little man whom he saw dodging up the stairs on New Year's day
+was her husband.</p>
+<p>It would be difficult to explain, on behalf of Mr. Overtop, a
+phenomenon which Mr. Overtop was never able to explain to the
+satisfaction of the gossip-loving public, or of his best friends.
+We therefore content ourselves with merely stating the fact, that
+Mr. Overtop's admiration for Mrs. Slapman was purely intellectual;
+that he was fascinated by her vivacious intellect, and not by her
+substantial person; by the charm of her manners, and not of her
+face. He looked upon Mrs. Slapman as a masculine mind and soul, of
+uncommon depth, made powerfully magnetic by its enshrinement in a
+feminine form. Overtop once told Matthew Maltboy, that he knew, in
+his own experience, the meaning of Platonic love. But Matthew, who
+was a sad materialist even in his sentimental moods, laughed at
+him, and winked. Overtop positively felt hurt at this unkind
+reception of his confidences, and never again alluded to the state
+of his feelings toward Mrs. Slapman, until subsequent occurrences
+made it necessary in self-defence.</p>
+<p>With Mr. Slapman he was not personally acquainted; but he had
+ascertained privately, from a musical frequenter of the house, who
+invariably brought his flute with him, and who was understood to be
+the oldest friend of the family, that Mr. Slapman owned a large
+property in wild land in Pennsylvania, not a hundred miles from New
+York; that he was improving it, and selling it out in building
+lots, and had already cleared a handsome fortune; that he was a
+strict business man, and looked after his affairs in person,
+passing between New York and Slapmansville (the name of the new
+settlement) twice a week, and spending the larger part of his time
+at the latter place. Also that, next to avarice, which was his
+crowning trait, his chief fault was jealousy. It galled him to
+think that his wife had obtained a settlement in bank from him
+before marriage, which enabled her to indulge her tastes for
+society; and it enraged him still more to observe how much she was
+loved and admired by others, when he had purchased her exclusively
+for his private love and admiration. He it was who was to be
+sometimes seen stalking through the parlors with a pale face, or
+running up and down the front staircase in a state of great nervous
+agitation. None of Mrs. Slapman's visitors had the pleasure of his
+personal acquaintance; and it was considered a point of good
+breeding not to allude to him in her presence.</p>
+<p>For this misguided man Fayette Overtop felt a real pity. He
+yearned to expostulate with him gently, as a friend. Taking Mr.
+Slapman's hand in his own, he would have said:</p>
+<p>"Your wife is a precious gift to the world. Seek not to check
+the outflow of her ardent nature. Thank Heaven that you are the
+custodian of such a treasure, not to be selfishly monopolized by
+yourself, but held in trust for the benefit of society."</p>
+<p>Overtop's meditations, on this particular occasion, pertained to
+the style of the costume which would most become him as the lover
+of Mrs. Slapman, in an original play to be enacted at her house
+toward the close of the week. The question was chiefly of knee
+breeches. Overtop was mentally debating whether he ought not, in
+justice to his thin legs, to substitute an ampler style of
+integuments.</p>
+<p>Matthew Maltboy had also been invited to this <i>soir&eacute;e
+dramatique</i> (as Mrs. Slapman's large pasteboards expressed it).
+A fat man was a necessity of the play. Mrs. Slapman was not cordial
+to Matthew, regarding him as an excessively commonplace person, and
+had invited him to her social gatherings out of courtesy to
+Overtop; but her artist eye saw in him a fitness for the fat man.
+Matthew was delighted with the implied compliment to those talents
+for the stage which every man supposes himself to possess in some
+degree, and cheerfully undertook the part.</p>
+<p>The proprieties of costume did not in the least perplex Mr.
+Maltboy, as he lay on the sofa digesting his dinner, and puffing
+out smoke rings by the dozen. His thoughts were mildly fixed on
+that delightful Miss Whedell. Five times he had been graciously
+permitted to visit the lady at her house, and to discover a score
+of new charms at each interview. A large experience in love making
+assured him that the object of his idolatry was not wholly
+indifferent to him. The paternal Whedell had hobbies. Matthew had
+studied them, like a skilful strategist, catered to them, and felt
+quite sure that he had that revered individual on his side. But, in
+the midst of these pleasant imaginings, there rose the dark and
+baleful image of Chiffield!</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson was also pondering--pleasantly, if one might
+judge from the contented smile upon his lips. The subject of his
+thoughts was one which, for reasons that seemed good to him, he
+still kept secret from his fellow bachelors. He had freely told
+them of his singular adventure at the house of the old gentleman
+opposite; but not a word of the inventor and his daughter, and of
+the private school at Miss Pillbody's. Not even the minute and
+sometimes tedious accounts which Overtop and Maltboy gave of their
+private thoughts and experiences, could induce Marcus to
+reciprocate their confidence. For the first time in his life he
+wore a mask before his companions, and prevaricated, and became, on
+a small scale, a humbug.</p>
+<p>The sharp ringing of the doorbell broke in upon the quiet
+reflections of the three bachelors. Mash, the cook, who was at that
+moment reading the fifteenth chapter of "The Buttery and the
+Boudoir: A Tale of Real Life," in her favorite weekly, threw down
+the paper in a passion, bounded up stairs, and admitted John Wesley
+Tiffles, or Wesley Tiffles, as he always subscribed himself on
+promissory notes and other worthless paper. Mr. Tiffles chucked
+Mash familiarly under the chin (resented with a scornful look by
+Mash, who had learned from "The Buttery and the Boudoir" to set a
+proper value on herself), and then walked straight to the parlor,
+like one who knew he was a welcome guest.</p>
+<p>And he was right. For when he opened the door, and disclosed to
+the three bachelors the well-known laughing eyes, hopeful face, and
+spare figure of Wesley Tiffles, they hailed him with enthusiasm. He
+was a walking cure for despondency, although he sometimes charged
+too high, in the shape of borrowed money, for his professional
+services. But neither of the three bachelors had yet sustained that
+pecuniary tax which Wesley Tiffles always levied upon his friends,
+just before leaving them forever. They formed a part of his reserve
+corps, which had latterly been sadly thinned out in Mr. Tiffles's
+desperate contest with the world.</p>
+<p>Mr. Tiffles shook hands with Marcus Wilkeson, giving him the
+grip of some unknown Order, slapped Overtop on the back, and
+playfully pulled the whiskers of Maltboy. Then he filled a pipe,
+threw himself into a chair, adjusted his legs in the true form of a
+compass, and opened his coat ostentatiously. All this in about ten
+seconds, and with a geniality that defied reproof. He was the very
+embodiment of cheer.</p>
+<p>"Prepare to be astonished," said Mr. Tiffles, after his third
+whiff. "I have a splendid idea." The three bachelors smiled, and
+nodded an intimation that they were prepared,</p>
+<p>"I have had some impracticable notions in my time; but this
+<i>is</i> good, and you'll say so. You know that dog, Mark, two
+doors below--the large yellow one, with cropped ears, and a tail
+like the handle of a shaving brush?"</p>
+<p>Mr. Wilkeson replied that he had the pleasure of the animal's
+acquaintance,</p>
+<p>"Well, as I was passing the dog's house on my way here, I
+slipped in the snow. The dog, always on the alert for victims, took
+a mean advantage of my situation, and jumped after me through the
+open gate. I scrambled to my feet, but not before he had fastened
+his teeth in my right leg----"</p>
+<p>"Good heavens! was he mad?" cried Overtop, who had a horror of
+dogs, and made wide circuits about them in the street.</p>
+<p>"Can't say as to that," replied Wesley Tiffles, "but advise you
+to keep shy of him for the future, I was about to say that he bit
+me through the leg of my trowsers. And on that very instant, as if
+by inspiration, I caught--not the hydrophobia, but a magnificent
+idea. Having got on my pins, I kicked the dog into his front yard,
+and immediately worked the idea into shape. You'll be sure to like
+it."</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson, speaking for self and friends, said he had no
+doubt of that. Mr. Tiffles's ideas always possessed the merit of
+novelty.</p>
+<p>"That means that they have no other merit!" returned Tiffles,
+laughing, "Very true of most of them, I confess all my failures.
+But here is an idea which even you, skeptic as you are, will grant
+to be not only novel, but great. You have all observed, gentlemen,
+the immense differences in dogs. There are white, black, brown,
+gray, yellow (like our suggestive canine friend two doors below),
+tan-colored, mouse-colored, striped, and spotted dogs. There are
+round dogs, square dogs, long dogs, short dogs, tall dogs, and low
+dogs. There are full-grown dogs that weigh less than a pound, and
+others that kick the beam at a hundred pounds. There are dogs that
+are pretty much all tail, and there are dogs that have no tail to
+speak of. Among all the dogs that you meet in the street, do you
+ever see two exactly alike?"</p>
+<p>Fayette Overtop, who spoke from extensive and minute
+observation, unhesitatingly said "No."</p>
+<p>"True! Nature never repeats herself in dogs. In so doing, Nature
+works directly for my benefit, as I will show you. Now, in the
+second place, as you are probably aware, there is an ordinance
+forbidding unmuzzled dogs to run in the streets during the hot
+months--"</p>
+<p>"An excellent law," interrupted Overtop.</p>
+<p>"If caught at large without muzzles, they are taken to the
+public pound, and, unless redeemed by the owners within twenty-four
+hours, are drowned in a tub--"</p>
+<p>"Serve 'em right," remarked the hydrophobiac bachelor.</p>
+<p>"Now, I am <i>slightly</i> acquainted with some members of the
+Common Council" (he laid emphasis on the word "slightly," to imply
+that he was on terms of the closest intimacy with them), "and can
+easily obtain from them the privilege of catching all the stray
+dogs, and taking them out of the country next summer."</p>
+<p>"Which would be very benevolent to the dogs; and, regarded from
+their point of view, your idea is a noble one," thoughtfully
+observed Marcus Wilkeson. "But I don't, at this moment, exactly see
+how you are benefited by it."</p>
+<p>Mr. Tiffles smiled with the consciousness of power, and
+chidingly said:</p>
+<p>"You are dull this morning, Mark--quite dull. Strike, but hear!
+In a word, then, I propose to exhibit two or three hundred of these
+dogs, in some country where there are <i>no</i> dogs. I would give
+them strange names, put them in cages, and call them the 'American
+Menagerie of Trained Animals.' A person who had never seen dogs,
+would suppose each one to be a different species from the
+others--just as the lion, the tiger, and the leopard are different,
+though all belonging to the one cat family. Now, there is my idea.
+What do you think of it? Of course, you laugh, at first."</p>
+<p>Roars of laughter from the three bachelors had formed the chorus
+of "Wesley Tiffles's closing sentences. Marcus Wilkeson, as became
+his age, was the first to recover himself.</p>
+<p>"The idea is a splendid one. None better. But there is one
+slight difficulty in the way. Where are you to find your country
+that has no dogs? If there were such a happy land on the face of
+this earth, Overtop would have hunted it up long ago, and moved
+there."</p>
+<p>Overtop laughingly replied, "That's so." He then informed Mr.
+Tiffles, while admitting the theoretical excellence of his idea,
+that every nation had its dogs as well as its fleas. Those two
+friends of man were impartially distributed over the terrestrial
+globe. Overtop referred to the standard Cyclopaedias, and several
+works on Natural History, in proof of his assertion.</p>
+<p>"Can't be! can't be!" retorted Wesley Tiffles, who was at first
+disposed to defend his brilliant idea. But brilliant ideas were a
+common growth of his fertile mind, and, like all things easily
+produced, he held them cheaply. The moment that evidence, or the
+test of practice, showed them to be fallacious, he gave them up,
+and drew upon his brain for others. So, after a second's
+reflection, he added:</p>
+<p>"Perhaps you are right. Dogs are not exactly in my line, after
+all. But the idea, as an idea, was magnificent."</p>
+<p>As Wesley Tiffles spoke, he repeated the act, for the twentieth
+time, of throwing back his overcoat (a little seedy), and opening
+his vest, as if to draw attention to his shirt front, whose natural
+whiteness was toned down by a delicate neutral tint. Immediately
+afterward, he placed his hand on a small breastpin in the centre of
+the shirt front, and turned it to the right and left. It sparkled
+for the first time in the rays of the fire, and revealed to the
+experienced eyes of the three bachelors simultaneously, that Wesley
+Tiffles was the wearer of a real diamond.</p>
+<p>"Excuse me," said Marcus Wilkeson, who divined that Tiffles
+wished his diamond to be remarked upon, "but that is pretty!"</p>
+<p>"Pretty! What?" said Tiffles, looking about the room.</p>
+<p>"That diamond."</p>
+<p>"Oh! the diamond. Perhaps you would like to look at it?" (hands
+it round for inspection). "Cost forty dollars. Rather a hard draw
+on my exchequer" (that was Mr. Tiffles's word for a friend's
+pocket); "but I considered it a most judicious investment for a
+young man just going into business."</p>
+<p>The novelty of this idea was not lost on Fayette Overtop. "Pray
+explain, Tiffles," said he.</p>
+<p>"Cheerfully," said Tiffles, replacing the gem in his shirt
+front, after it had been duly handled and admired. "Nobody will
+acknowledge that he is taken in by a diamond. He will say, 'Anybody
+can buy a diamond, by saving up thirty or forty dollars; and why
+should I believe a man to be rich who wears one?' Yet, in his heart
+of hearts, he does believe it, unless the possessor of the diamond
+has the bad taste to dress flashily. Then he passes for an
+impostor, and people will doubt, even against their own senses, the
+genuineness of the stone. But let him dress plainly, as I do,"
+continued Mr. Tiffles, stroking down the left leg of his black
+trowsers, shiny with wear, "and that little diamond shall stand, in
+the eyes of the whole world, as the representative of a fat bank
+account, a brown stone house, and a couple of corner lots."</p>
+<p>Marcus and Matthew laughed, but Fayette Overtop, who absolutely
+revelled in paradoxes, said, "True, Tiffles, true!"</p>
+<p>"Don't think," pursued Tiffles, "that I expected to impose on
+you with it. You know that I am a poor devil, living on my wits."
+(Tiffles was delightfully frank with his intimate acquaintances.)
+"I hold out this glittering bait, not for my friends, but for my
+old foe and natural enemy, the world. You must know that I am on
+the eve of a grand speculation--probably the grandest I have ever
+undertaken."</p>
+<p>"Another plan of advertising with large kites by day, and
+pictorial lanterns attached to their tails at night?" asked Marcus
+Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>"Or another Submarine Pneumatic Parcel-Delivering Tube to
+Brooklyn?" asked Matthew Maltboy.</p>
+<p>"Or an Association for the Cultivation of Mushrooms in Dark
+Cellars?" asked Fayette Overtop.</p>
+<p>"Capital hits!" replied Wesley Tiffles, who took an unfeigned
+delight in a friendly allusion to his failures. "But allow me to
+inform you definitely, that those unfortunate speculations are not
+to be revived. Like the lightning, I don't strike twice in the same
+place. No; the project upon which I am now engaged is one so
+eminently practical, so free from all that is visionary, that you
+will wonder how I thought of it. That project is a PANORAMA OF
+AFRICA!"</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="D_CHAPTER_V."></a>CHAPTER V.</h2>
+<h3>THE PANORAMA OF AFRICA</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The three bachelors concurred in the opinion that the idea was a
+good one; but Marcus Wilkeson suggested that the field was too
+large.</p>
+<p>"I thought you would like the general proposition," said
+Tiffles. "But, bless you, Mark! I don't mean to paint the whole
+continent, from stem to stern, so to speak; only the undiscovered
+part of Central Africa--say from Cape Guardafui on the east to the
+Bight of Benin on the west."</p>
+<p>"But how the deuce," asked Matthew Maltboy, "are you, or anybody
+else, going to paint what has not been discovered?"</p>
+<p>Tiffles could hardly suppress a smile at the simplicity of the
+question. "Why," said he, "that's easy enough. Don't all the
+geographers tell us that the interior of Africa is made up, so far
+as known, of alternate deserts and jungles, like the patches on a
+coverlet? Very well. I conform to this general principle of the
+continent. I put half of the canvas in desert, and the rest in
+jungle, and I can't be far out of the way. Take the idea?"</p>
+<p>"Perfectly," said Matthew Maltboy; "but if you have nothing but
+alternate, deserts and jungles, it strikes me your panorama will be
+a little monotonous. Perhaps I am wrong." (Maltboy always offered
+suggestions timidly.)</p>
+<p>"I have thought of that, and guarded against it. I shall fill
+the jungles with animated life--elephants, lions, tigers, panthers,
+leopards, rhinoceroses, hippopotamuses, giraffes, zebras,
+crocodiles, boa constrictors, and other specimens of natural
+history indigenous to that delightful region."</p>
+<p>"Good!" cried Overtop; "and if you will take a hint from me, you
+will show your elephants in the act of being caught by natives, or
+engaged in combats with each other; your lions fighting your tigers
+or your rhinoceroses; your hippopotamuses engaged in death
+struggles with your crocodiles; and your boa constrictors gobbling
+down your natives--or, if that is objectionable on the score of
+humanity, your monkeys."</p>
+<p>"Thank you for the hint; but the expense, and the necessity of
+completing the panorama at an early day, put it out of the
+question. To paint accurate representations of these animals
+engaged in their innocent sports, would occupy the time of a
+first-class artist for months, and cost an enormous sum."</p>
+<p>"Ah, I see," interrupted Overtop, who liked to show that he
+snatched the meaning; "you will put your animals in recumbent
+attitudes--sleeping, perhaps, in the depth of jungles, shaded from
+the fierce rays of the equatorial sun."</p>
+<p>"You have guessed it," said Tiffles, with a broad smile. "Most
+of them will be just there--out of sight. The others will be
+suggested rather than introduced. Elephants will be signified by
+their trunks appearing above the tops of the dense undergrowth.
+Lions, tigers, and other quadrupeds, by the tips of their tails. A
+boa constrictor will be expressed by a head, a coil, and a bit of
+tail showing at intervals. The one horn of the rhinoceros will
+always tell where <i>he</i> is. I shall have two small lakes (they
+are scarce in Africa) for my hippopotamuses and crocodiles. If they
+exhibit only small portions of their heads above the surface, that
+is not my fault. It is the nature of the beasts, you know."</p>
+<p>"Ha! ha! That is what I call Art concealing Art," said
+Overtop.</p>
+<p>"So it is," returned Tiffles; "and it will be appreciated, I
+doubt not, by those who affect the school of Severe Simplicity in
+painting."</p>
+<p>"One thing more," said Marcus Wilkeson. "Do you intend to take
+the panorama through the country, and lecture on it?"</p>
+<p>"I do. And here let me say, that I read up the law of false
+pretences long ago. I shall style myself Professor Wesley on the
+bills. That I have a right to do, as my full name doesn't look well
+in type. Actors and singers do the same thing every day. I shall
+call myself a great traveller. This is strictly true. I have been
+North to Boston, West to Detroit, and South to Baltimore. I shall
+not say that I have been in Africa, or that the sketches were taken
+on the spot. If my audience choose to infer <i>that</i>, that is
+their business. If any one doubts the accuracy of my panorama, I
+can say triumphantly, 'Prove it!'"</p>
+<p>"Excellent, but a little risky," said Marcus Wilkeson, who could
+not help admiring the audacity of the plan. "Your next great
+difficulty will be to satisfy audiences after you have got them
+together, as I dare say you will, by some brilliant system of
+advertising. I have heard--perhaps you have--of audiences breaking
+furniture, smashing chandeliers, and tarring and feathering
+people."</p>
+<p>"All that has been thought of," was the reply. "Before I leave
+the city, I shall give a private exhibition of the panorama to a
+few ministers of various denominations, in the lecture room of some
+up-town church. Ministers, you know, are debarred by their
+profession from attending the opera and theatres, and will catch at
+the chance to see a panorama for nothing. In private life, they are
+capital people, as a class--I have known several of them--and will
+willingly certify that the panorama is a highly moral, instructive,
+and interesting exhibition. I think I can rely on my persuasive
+powers for that much. These certificates I shall print on my
+posters and handbills. They will draw moral audiences. Moral
+audiences do not break furniture, &amp;c., &amp;c. Comprehend my
+line of argument?"</p>
+<p>"Perfectly," said Marcus; "and very ingenious, <i>as</i> an
+argument."</p>
+<p>"I thought you would like it. And now, to drop the subject, I
+want you three fellows to come up to my rooms, No. 121, third
+floor, Bartholomew Buildings, Broadway--you remember--and see this
+great work of art, early next week."</p>
+<p>"Is it nearly finished?" asked Marcus.</p>
+<p>"Yes--in my mind's eye. That is the main thing. The painting has
+not yet been begun. It will be a very simple matter. The canvas
+will be about four hundred feet long. One half of it will be a dead
+level of yellow paint, for desert; and the rest, perpendicular
+stripes of green paint, for jungle. A good artist, with a whitewash
+brush and two tubsful of paint, ought to do up the whole panorama
+in two days. The heads and tails of animated life, the two small
+lakes, and a few other objects of interest, such as the sun, the
+moon, birds flying in the air, &amp;c., could be put in afterward
+by an artist of higher grade. And, by the way, now I think of it, I
+may as well open with a sunrise off Cape Guardafui, and a distant
+view of the Straits of Babel Mandel, give a passing glance at the
+sources of the Nile, which lie in that undiscovered region, a brief
+glimpse at the Mountains of the Moon, and wind up with a splendid
+sunset in the Bight of Benin. It--"</p>
+<p>Mr. Tiffles's observations were cut short by the sudden entrance
+of Miss Philomela Wilkeson. She shot rapidly into the room, but,
+when her eyes rested on Mr. Tiffles, she recoiled with maiden
+modesty, and stepped back as if to beat a retreat. Then, recovering
+her self-possession in a small measure, she stepped forward again,
+and said, in the blandest of tones, with just the least virgin
+coyness:</p>
+<p>"I thought perhaps I had left my scissors here this
+afternoon."</p>
+<p>Messrs. Wilkeson, Overtop, and Maltboy asserted, without rising
+from their seats, that they had not seen her scissors, and doubted
+very much whether the scissors were in that room. But Wesley
+Tiffles, who was the most polite and obliging of mortals when there
+was a lady in the case, rose respectfully upon her entrance, and
+insisted upon searching the apartment for the missing tool.</p>
+<p>Miss Wilkeson, thus being placed under obligations to Mr.
+Tiffles, was compelled to take personal cognizance of him, which
+she did with the nearest approach to a blush that she was ever
+known to make. "I beg, sir, that you will not trouble yourself.
+I--I do not think the scissors are here, after all."</p>
+<p>"That can be ascertained only by searching, miss," replied
+Tiffles. Then he glided about the room in his own nimble fashion,
+looking behind the two vases on the mantelpiece, raking over the
+littered burden of the table in the corner, and peering and poking
+into every place where there was the least likelihood of finding a
+stray pair of scissors; Miss Wilkeson all the while deprecating any
+further search.</p>
+<p>Mr. Tiffles suddenly stopped, like a dragonfly in the midst of
+his angular dartings, and said: "Since your scissors are not to be
+found, it is fortunate that I have a pocket pair, which are always
+at your service." Mr. Tiffles produced the ill-omened article, and
+handed it to her. This called out a new lot of thanks, regrets for
+having troubled him, apologies, and a peremptory refusal to take
+his scissors, immediately followed by their acceptance, and a
+promise that she would take the best care of them, and return them
+to the owner on his next visit.</p>
+<p>Then was the auspicious moment for Miss Wilkeson to have retired
+with dignity; but she stood at the door, twirling the fatal
+scissors in her hand, and waiting either to say something which did
+not come spontaneously, or to have something said to her.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson saw a subtle motive in this awkward tarrying at
+the door, and, having no objection to gratifying it, he straightway
+introduced Mr. Wesley Tiffles to Miss Philomela Wilkeson. Mr.
+Tiffles put himself into the form of an L, like a professional
+acrobat; and Miss Wilkeson executed a courtesy in the old, exploded
+style. Then, as if appalled at what she had done, she backed into
+the entry as fast as she had come from it.</p>
+<p>Mr. Tiffles, upon whom the small events of life made no
+impression, thought no more of Miss Wilkeson that evening, but
+smoked three pipes, told two funny stories, sang one comic song,
+and then went home, having previously exacted from the three
+bachelors a promise to call at his rooms and see at least one half
+of the panorama completed, on the following day week.</p>
+<p>Since Miss Wilkeson had been an inmate of that house, she had
+seen Wesley Tiffles perhaps a dozen times, in the entry or on the
+doorsteps, and had been impressed with his gentlemanlike air, his
+quick black eyes, and his deferential manner toward her. Everybody
+is supposed to have a realized ideal somewhere, if he or she could
+only find it. Such was Wesley Tiffles to Philomela Wilkeson. Let it
+be confessed at once. The lost scissors were all the time quietly
+resting at the bottom of Miss Wilkeson's workbag, and she knew it.
+The prevalent frailty of human nature must be her excuse.</p>
+<p>She had-obtained not only an introduction to Wesley Tiffles, but
+a pair of scissors which must be returned to him, and were
+therefore a bond of friendship. But Miss Wilkeson forgot the
+fatality which the proverb attaches to gifts or loans of that
+particular article of cutlery.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_FIFTH."></a>BOOK FIFTH.</h2>
+<h3>MANOEUVRES.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="E_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>STOLEN--MOKE THAN A PURSE.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>One morning, as Marcus Wilkeson was idly turning the pages of a
+blue-and-gold favorite, the doorbell rang. In accordance with some
+mysterious law of acoustics, the sound was full three minutes
+descending the kitchen staircase, entering the keyhole of the
+kitchen door, and striking on the tympanum of Mash, the cook, who
+was sitting by the fire, reading the twenty-fifth chapter of "The
+Buttery and the Boudoir: A Tale of Real Life." When Mash became
+fully conscious (which was not till the end of the chapter) that
+the bell had rung, she expelled a sigh from her fat chest, and
+wiped the tears from her eyes with the end of her clean apron, and
+then went to the door with a noble resignation to her lot. There
+she found a stout elderly woman, bearing a note for "Marcus
+Wilkeson, Esq."</p>
+<p>"Lor'! how slow you are!" said the stout woman, handing the
+letter to her.</p>
+<p>Mash, who had read, in the twenty-third chapter, of the
+overwhelming way in which the heroine cook had answered an insult
+by dignified silence, said not a word in reply, but took the note,
+and slammed the door in the stout woman's face.</p>
+<p>The exclamation "Bah!" and certain indistinct mutterings which
+were audible through the panels, convinced Mash that, by her
+self-denial, she had won a moral victory. It was with a feeling of
+excusable pride that she walked into the back parlor, and delivered
+the note to Marcus Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>"Thank you, Mash," said he. It was a singular illustration of
+his excessive politeness, that he was no less grateful for paid
+services than for free.</p>
+<p>Mash retired, thinking to herself that, if Mr. Wilkeson were
+only a pirate, a smuggler, a guerilla chieftain, or a dashing
+fellow in some unlawful, dangerous business, a few years younger,
+he would be a perfect hero.</p>
+<p>Marcus did not recognize the handwriting of the address. Tearing
+open the envelope, he read the following lines, hastily scrawled on
+a bit of blue paper:</p>
+<blockquote>Wednesday, A.M.<br>
+MARCUS WILKESON, ESQ.:<br>
+<br>
+SIR: Please come over and see me immediately. I have something
+important to communicate.<br>
+<br>
+Your obedient servant,<br>
+ELIPHALET MINFORD.</blockquote>
+<p>"Something must be wrong," said Marcus; and startling thoughts
+then occurred to him. "Has her hard studying brought on illness? It
+can't be. She was well enough last evening. What can be the
+matter?"</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson's temperament was of that unfortunate nervous
+sort which is thrown off its balance by the slightest shock. His
+frame trembled as he put on his overcoat and hat; and, when he
+looked in the mirror, he noticed that his face was paler than
+usual, and his eyes were glassy. "Pooh! what a sensitive fool I
+am!" said he.</p>
+<p>He walked hurriedly to Mr. Minford's, and mounted the long,
+creaking staircases, two steps at a time, tormenting himself all
+the way with vague apprehensions of evil.</p>
+<p>When he entered the room, without knocking (as was his custom of
+late), he found the inventor standing in front of his machine, with
+bare arms, hard at work. Marcus nervously said, "Good morning," and
+stepped forward to shake him by the hand, but stopped when he saw
+that Mr. Minford averted his face, and did not move.</p>
+<p>"I wished to show you a letter which I received a few minutes
+ago," said the inventor, still not facing Marcus, but busily filing
+off the rough edge of a brass wheel fresh from the mould. "There it
+is, on the table."</p>
+<p>Marcus caught up the letter, and read the following:</p>
+<blockquote>NEW YORK, Wednesday Forenoon.<br>
+MR. MINFORD:<br>
+<br>
+RESPECTED SIR: Allow a true friend and well wisher to ask a few
+questions. Who is this Mr. Marcus Wilkeson that has suddenly taken
+such an interest in your family affairs? What is his private
+history? Why is he relieving you from all trouble and expense in
+the education of your beautiful child? What are the man's
+<i>real</i> motives? Would it not be well to spare your eyes from
+your invention long enough to look into these matters a little?
+Pardon the suggestion. The office of a spy, and a secret accuser,
+is an unpleasant, and, perhaps, a thankless one. I should never
+have assumed it, but for the fact that your ardent devotion to
+science may render you the easy dupe--and your daughter the
+innocent victim--of a designing and heartless man of the world. I
+do not ask you to believe the writer of an anonymous note, and
+therefore I make no specific charges against this Wilkeson; but
+merely ask you to inquire into his private character, and, above
+all, his MOTIVES, for yourself.<br>
+<br>
+ONE OF MANY.</blockquote>
+<p>Though Marcus Wilkeson was as innocent as a child, in deed and
+thought, of the baseness hinted at in this letter, he felt that he
+was looking guilty. Astonishment and indignation kindled in his
+eyes; but a flush of shame mounted at the same time to his cheeks.
+Marcus had often said, that if he were tapped on the shoulder in
+the street, and charged with a petty theft, he would look guilty of
+grand larceny until he could regain command of his feelings. This
+diseased sensitiveness, inherited from his mother, was the curse of
+his physical and mental organization.</p>
+<p>His shame was increased by a consciousness that the inventor was
+stealthily watching him, and studying the enlargement of those
+horrid red spots on his cheeks.</p>
+<p>"When Marcus finished the letter, he put on an expression of
+outraged innocence--which matched poorly with the flaming tokens of
+guilt--and said:</p>
+<p>"These are infernal lies, sir; and, if I knew the coward who
+wrote them, I would cram them down his throat."</p>
+<p>"Of course they are lies," returned Mr. Minford. "Every
+anonymous letter writer is a liar--until it is proved that he tells
+the truth. I shall believe none of these low aspersions on your
+honor, Mr. Wilkeson, without conclusive evidence." As the inventor
+said this, not emphatically, Marcus saw that he believed all that
+the letter had insinuated.</p>
+<p>By this time, Marcus had got his constitutional devil a little
+under control. There was something of real boldness and honesty in
+his eyes, as he answered:</p>
+<p>"This is a distressing subject to talk or think of. But now that
+it has been brought before us, I demand a full investigation. Go,
+wherever you will, among those who know me, and inquire into my
+character. Recall everything that has occurred between us since the
+beginning of our acquaintance. Ask your daughter if I have ever
+spoken a word to her, or cast a look at her, which could justify
+these infamous insinuations. Thus much I ask of you, in justice to
+me."</p>
+<p>"And I refuse, sir," said the inventor. "I will not insult you
+by an unworthy suspicion. The world is full of impertinent people,
+and we can no more stop their gabble, than that of swallows in the
+air. This nameless fellow signs himself 'One of Many,' That is
+probably a lie. But if there were thousands like himself prying
+into your and my affairs, I should not care. As for motives, none
+but fools and misanthropes trouble themselves about
+<i>them</i>."</p>
+<p>The inventor tossed off the last sentence contemptuously. But
+Marcus knew that he did attach a great importance to motives;
+although he could not fairly be ranked either among the
+misanthropes or the fools. He therefore replied:</p>
+<p>"The whole world is welcome to inquire into my motives. As I
+understand them, they are: First, I take pleasure in your society,
+sir, because, like myself, you are a quiet, thinking man. Second,
+you have a hobby--your machine, there--and I admire people with
+hobbies. Third, I am fond of children, and--and--your daughter is a
+very pleasant, intelligent child. Fourth, you have insisted on
+selling me an interest in your invention, in return for a small
+loan, and that fact would draw me here, if nothing else did. These
+are motives enough to satisfy the most inquisitive mind, I should
+think."</p>
+<p>Marcus said this with an attempt at a light laugh. But there was
+one motive not yet confessed--a motive which could hardly be called
+a motive, for it lay dim and half-formed within his brain. He had
+never, in his moments of self-inquisition, acknowledged its
+existence to himself. How could he, then, venture to disclose it to
+another? It was the suppression of this immature motive, that
+brought back that look of deceit and guilt to Marcus Wilkeson's
+ingenuous face.</p>
+<p>This unfortunate physiognomical revelation was not lost upon the
+keen eyes of the inventor. But he said:</p>
+<p>"Mr. Wilkeson, let us not say another word on this ridiculous
+subject. I am ashamed of myself for showing you the letter. I ought
+to have thrown it into the fire."</p>
+<p>"There I differ with you, my dear sir," said Marcus. "You did
+perfectly right, and I am glad that I have had the opportunity to
+define my position here clearly, once and for all." Marcus could
+not avoid saying this much in mere civility to the inventor, but he
+indulged the private opinion that that gentleman should have burned
+the anonymous note.</p>
+<p>"Who can have written this scoundrelly thing?" continued Marcus,
+turning over the letter, and then the envelope, for the twentieth
+time each, and minutely examining them.</p>
+<p>The note was written on a half sheet of common letter paper. The
+manufacturer's stamp in the corner had been cut off, and the size
+of the half sheet further diminished by paring down one of the
+sides. The writing was what is known as "backhanded," in strokes
+which appeared at first sight to be of a uniform lightness. On
+inspecting it very closely, Marcus discovered a tendency, in this
+backhanded penmanship, to ascend from the line; and also that, in a
+few instances, the downward strokes on certain long letters were a
+trifle thicker than on others. That the writing was a man's, Marcus
+had no doubt, though he would have been puzzled to give the reasons
+which led him to that conclusion. The envelope was the ordinary
+prepaid-stamped one issued by the Government, and therefore could
+not contribute to the identification of the anonymous writer. The
+superscription was in the same backhand, and was peculiar in
+nothing but a small curved nourish, like Hogarth's line of beauty,
+beneath the words, "New York. City."</p>
+<p>"The rascal has carefully disguised his hand," said Marcus, "and
+does not mean to be found out. I can say nothing more positive,
+than that it is written by somebody who has never corresponded with
+me. My memory of autographs happens to be pretty tenacious."</p>
+<p>"And I am positive that it is written by no acquaintance of
+mine, or of my daughter's, for we have none--except you. As the
+case now stands, it is a mystery, not worth the exploring."</p>
+<p>"Again I differ with you," said Marcus. "Whoever wrote this
+false letter, has powerful motives of hostility to me or you, or,
+perhaps--worse still--to your daughter. I must try to smoke him out
+of his hiding place. Meanwhile, I trust, sir, you will see the
+propriety of concealing this unpleasant matter from Miss
+Minford."</p>
+<p>"Certainly, Mr. Wilkeson, certainly. As for myself, it is
+forever dismissed from my mind; and I cannot blame myself
+sufficiently for having troubled you with it." Mr. Minford here
+proffered his hand, which Marcus cordially shook, rejoicing to
+observe no trace of suspicion in the inventor's clear gray
+eyes.</p>
+<p>"Allow me to retain this letter for the present," asked Marcus.
+"It may serve as a clue to the detection of the concealed
+scoundrel. I also beg that you will show me any other anonymous
+letters of the same character that may reach you."</p>
+<p>Mr. Minford laughed. "The stove door is the pigeonhole where all
+such nonsense ought to be filed away. But just as you please. If
+any more come to hand, you shall see them. They may amuse you, as
+they do me. Ha! ha!"</p>
+<p>Marcus echoed the laugh, but feebly. Then it occurred to him
+that Pet would soon be home, and he felt a strange aversion to
+meeting her, after what had happened. He therefore pleaded a
+pressing engagement at eleven o'clock (which it then was), and took
+his departure from the inventor's roof, but not without a warm and
+seemingly sincere invitation to "call soon."</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="E_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>CONSOLATIONS OF HIGH ART.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Marcus walked slowly toward Broadway, musing and unhappy. To a
+man of his delicate and hyper-sensitive nature, an event of this
+kind was a vast disturbance. He felt that this anonymous letter was
+but the forerunner of a long series of troubles. That prescience
+which nervous people have of misfortunes portrayed to him a future
+black with disappointments and dangers.</p>
+<p>"Hallo, Mark! What's the matter? You look as sad as a low
+comedian by daylight!" Previous to this salutation came a ringing
+slap on the left shoulder.</p>
+<p>Marcus rather liked familiarities; but the slap, coming on him
+when his nerves were unstrung, startled him. He turned sharply; but
+the stern and indignant face wreathed into amiable smiles, when he
+saw that the lively gentleman behind him was only Wesley Tiffles.
+Everybody liked Wesley Tiffles; even those who bore the burden of
+his unlucky financial schemes uniting in cheerful testimony to his
+charming, companionable qualities. His presence was like a ray of
+sunlight to Marcus Wilkeson's beclouded mind; and when Wesley
+Tiffles hooked an arm in his (as he did to everybody on the second
+day of their acquaintance), Marcus felt his perplexities passing
+away from him, like electricity on a conducting rod.</p>
+<p>Wesley Tiffles and his single diamond (the latter from the
+background of a third day's shirt) shone on him together; and
+Marcus laughed merrily in reply:</p>
+<p>"I don't look sad now," said he. "I'm glad to see you, Tiffles.
+What are you driving at <i>now</i>, eh?"</p>
+<p>This question was continually poked at Tiffles. He changed his
+business so often.</p>
+<p>"At the panorama of Africa, to be sure," said Tiffles. "It is a
+great idea, and I am constant to it, although several capital
+schemes have occurred to me since I first thought of it. But Africa
+deserves, and shall have the precedence."</p>
+<p>"Oh! yes--I remember. And how far have you got along with this
+great work?"</p>
+<p>"It's almost finished, thank you. Patching is the artist. You
+know Patching, of course--one of the most promising painters of the
+modern school. There were several Patchings very much praised by
+the Sunday papers, at the last National Academy Exhibition, though
+the hanging committee put them either among the dirt or the
+cobwebs. This conspiracy against Patching is far-reaching. It would
+seem as if his rivals of the Academy actually went about town
+calling upon people, and cautioning them <i>not</i> to buy
+Patchings. Indeed, to such an extent has this outrageous attempt to
+put down a fellow artist been carried, that I know of but one
+Patching to be publicly seen in the city. It is an attic
+interior--a sweet thing, quite equal to Fr&egrave;re, and hangs
+behind a bar near Spring street. Perhaps you would like to examine
+it?"</p>
+<p>"Hem! Not to-day. Some other time," answered Marcus, who,
+strangely enough, interpreted the question as an invitation to
+drink at his (Marcus's) expense.</p>
+<p>"I did not mean to-day," said Wesley Tiffles. "Any time will do.
+Well, I have engaged this brilliant but neglected creature to paint
+my panorama. At first he refused--as I expected. He said that it
+would hurt his reputation. I argued to him, that, the larger the
+picture, the more the reputation; and said that I would put his
+name on the bills in type second only to my own. But he could not
+bring himself to see the matter as I did, and consented to paint it
+only on condition of profound secrecy. Price, one hundred dollars.
+You will therefore understand (Tiffles lowered his voice) that what
+I am saying to you is strictly confidential--as, indeed, all is
+that I say about my panorama. Secrecy alone gives value to these
+grand, original ideas."</p>
+<p>Wesley Tiffles was always unbosoming himself to the world, and
+informing each individual hearer that his disclosure was strictly
+confidential.</p>
+<p>"I give you my word," said Marcus. He wondered where Tiffles
+raised the money to pay the artist, but did not like to ask
+him.</p>
+<p>"Now I have caught you, you must come and see how we get along.
+The work is going on at my room in the Bartholomew Buildings, only
+a few steps from here." (According to Tiffles, the Bartholomew
+Buildings were only a few steps from anywhere, when he wanted to
+take anybody to them.) "Patching will object to bringing in a
+stranger; but I can pass you off as a capitalist, who thinks of
+taking an interest in the panorama. Good joke, that!"</p>
+<p>Marcus drew back a little at the joke; but Wesley Tiffles had
+proved so great a relief to his low spirits, that he determined to
+keep on taking him, and expressed his ardent desire to see the
+panorama.</p>
+<p>The couple, arm in arm, sauntered into Broadway, and down that
+thoroughfare. Tiffles nodded to a great many acquaintances, and
+Wilkeson to a very few. People whom Tiffles did not know
+personally, he had short biographies of, and he entertained Marcus
+with an incessant string of anecdotes and memoranda of passers by.
+The walk was leisurely and uninterrupted, with two exceptions, when
+Wesley Tiffles broke suddenly from his companion, rushed into the
+entry of a photographic establishment, and examined numerous square
+feet of show portraits with profound interest. Marcus explained
+these impulsive movements on the supposition that Tiffles sought to
+escape from approaching duns. He noticed that that individual,
+while observing people who streamed by him on either side, kept one
+eye, as it were, about a block and a half ahead. In some parts of
+the world, Marcus might have objected to walking publicly with a
+man of such an eccentric demeanor. But he was well aware that, in
+New York, a citizen's reputation is not in the least degree
+affected by the company that he keeps.</p>
+<p>They soon arrived at the Bartholomew Buildings--a rickety
+five-story edifice, which had been altered from a hotel to a nest
+of private offices. The basement was a restaurant, the first floor
+a dry goods store, and thence to the roof there was a small Babel
+of trades and professions known and unknown. No census taker had
+ever booked all the businesses and all the names under that
+comprehensive roof.</p>
+<p>In the upper story of this building, at the end of a long, hall,
+the floor of which was hollowed in places by the feet of half a
+century, was the room, or office, as he called it, of Mr. Wesley
+Tiffles. There was no number, or sign, on the door, but only a card
+bearing the inscription, in a bold hand, "Back in five minutes."
+Mr. Tiffles always put out this standing announcement whenever he
+had occasion to absent himself from his office for an indefinite
+period. At the top of the door there was a swinging window, which
+was ever close fastened, and covered with four thicknesses of
+newspapers. Though door and window were shut, there came from this
+room, as if through pores of the wood and the glass, a strong odor
+of tobacco smoke. A voice within could be heard softly humming an
+operatic air.</p>
+<p>Wesley Tiffles opened the door with a latch key, saying, "All
+right!" in a loud voice, as he did so. Marcus entered with him into
+a blue cloud of smoke heated to a sickly degree by a small coal
+stove with a prodigious quantity of pipe. Even Marcus's hardened
+lungs found it difficult to breathe.</p>
+<p>The room was about twenty feet square. It had been a part of the
+laundry when the building was a hotel. The walls, from the floor to
+the low ceiling, appeared to be hung with a strange, dim tapestry.
+A second glance convinced Marcus Wilkeson that this seeming
+tapestry was the panorama, which was fastened on stretchers along
+three sides of the room, and rolled up in a corner as fast as
+completed. At the farther end of the room, barely visible through
+the smoke, was the figure of a man in a torn and dirty dressing
+gown, and an enormous black felt hat with a huge turn-up brim, of
+the kind supposed to be worn by the bandits of the Pyrenees. The
+back of the man was turned to Marcus Wilkeson, and he was making
+rapid dabs on the canvas with a long brush, frequently dipping into
+one of a series of pails or pans which stood on the floor by his
+side. He was smoking and humming the operatic air at the same time;
+and he pulled his great slouched hat farther over his eyes, as a
+signal for impertinent curiosity to keep its distance.</p>
+<p>Wesley Tiffles whispered something about the eccentricities of
+genius, and then said:</p>
+<p>"Mr. Patching. Allow me. Mr. Wilkeson. A capitalist, who thinks
+of taking a small interest in the panorama. Confidential, of
+course."</p>
+<p>The artist turned round during these remarks, and presented the
+original of a portrait which Marcus remembered to have
+seen--dressing gown, hat, and all--in a small print-shop window in
+the Sixth Avenue. Touching the face he might have had doubt, but
+there was no mistaking the pattern of the dressing gown and the
+amazing hat. He also had a faint recollection of the thin face, the
+Vandyke beard, and the long, tangled hair at Mrs. Slapman's, on New
+Year's, but was not positive as to their identity. Mr. Patching's
+individuality lay chiefly in his hat.</p>
+<p>The artist placed a moist hand, with one long finger nail like a
+claw, at the disposal of Marcus Wilkeson. The latter gentleman
+shook the member feebly, and distinctly felt the sharp edge of the
+long finger nail in his palm. It was an unpleasant sensation.</p>
+<p>"Happy to meet a <i>confidential</i> friend of Tiffles's," said
+Patching. "Painting panoramas is not exactly what I have been used
+to. An artist's reputation is his capital in trade, you know." He
+spoke slowly and languidly, as if hope and happiness were quite
+dead within him, and he had consented to live on only for the good
+of high Art.</p>
+<p>"I understand," said Marcus. "The secret shall be
+inviolate."</p>
+<p>"Nothing but my old friendship for Tiffles here could possibly
+have induced me to undertake the job. My enemies--and I have them,
+ha! ha!" (he said this bitterly)--"would like nothing better to say
+of Patching, than that he had got down to the panorama line of
+business. It would be a pretty piece of scandal."</p>
+<p>"My lips are sealed, sir. But it strikes me, as a casual
+observer, that there is nothing to be ashamed of in this beautiful
+work of art." Marcus Wilkeson had the amiable vice of flattery.</p>
+<p>Patching shrugged his shoulders, and made a contemptuous gesture
+toward the canvas with his outstretched brush. "A mere daub," said
+he. "One step higher than painting a barn or a board fence--that's
+all."</p>
+<p>"Yet the true artist adorns what he touches," said Marcus.</p>
+<p>Patching accepted the homage calmly, as one who knew that he
+deserved it. "A very just and discriminating remark, sir. I have no
+doubt that a person thoroughly familiar with my style would say,
+looking at this panorama, 'It has the severe simplicity of a
+Patching.' I consented to paint it, as Tiffles well remembers, only
+on condition that I should not wholly abase myself by abandoning
+the style upon which I have built up my reputation."</p>
+<p>Tiffles, thus appealed to, corroborated the statement with a
+solemn bow.</p>
+<p>The artist continued: "Fortunately, the subject is one
+peculiarly adapted to my genius. For instance: the desert of Sahara
+is a dead level of sand. It is a perfect type of severe simplicity
+in the highest sense. It exhibits no common display of gorgeous
+colors, such as poor artists and the ignorant crowd rejoice in. As
+far as the eye can see, there is a serene stretch of yellow sand,
+without even a blade of grass to break its awful immensity." (The
+artist, being on his favorite theme, took his pipe out of his mouth
+for the first time, and spoke with warmth.) "Look at that bit of
+desert, now. Does it not convey a perfect idea of solitude and
+desolation?"</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson glanced at about ten feet of straight yellow
+paint (which was all of the desert of Sahara not rolled up in the
+canvas), and said that it did--which was perfectly true.</p>
+<p>"There are one hundred feet more, which you don't see, just like
+it. Another artist would have put in an oasis, or a stray hyena, or
+the bleached bones of an unfortunate traveller. <i>I</i> did not.
+Why? Another would have worked up a sunset, or a moonrise, or a
+thunder storm, to give variety to the sky. <i>I</i> did not. Why?
+The sky over my desert is an uninterrupted blue. There is not even
+a bird in it. There is nothing, in short, either on the ground or
+in the air, to take away the mind of the spectator, for one moment,
+from the sublime idea of a desert--an object which, considered
+aesthetically, is one of the grandest in the universe. This is
+severe simplicity. It is the highest school of Art."</p>
+<p>"And the cheapest," observed Tiffles; "which is an important
+consideration when you have an acre or two of canvas to paint. It
+would cost a deal more to put in the sun and moon, travelling
+caravans, and other objects of interest, here and there."</p>
+<p>"Incidentally it may be the cheapest," said Patching. "But that
+is a question for capitalists, and not for artists to determine.
+True Art never thinks of the expense."</p>
+<p>"It always seemed to me to be the easiest school of Art," said
+Marcus Wilkeson. "I suppose, now, that you can dash off twenty or
+thirty rods of this a day."</p>
+<p>Patching smiled with a lofty pity. "So I can. Not because it is
+the easiest, though--far from it; but because I happen to have a
+genius for quick and sure touches. You, not being a professional
+artist, think the execution of that scrap of desert and sky an easy
+matter. Perhaps you fancy that you could do it." There was the
+least infusion of satire in the artist's tone.</p>
+<p>"Oh, no!" replied Marcus Wilkeson, who ever shrank from wounding
+the self-love of a fellow creature. "I am not rash enough to
+suppose that I could do it. I merely observed that it seemed--to my
+inexperienced eyes--an easy matter. A few strokes of yellow paint
+here, for sand, and a few strokes of blue paint there, for sky. But
+I am not even an amateur, and so my opinion goes for nothing."</p>
+<p>"I admire your frankness," said Patching. "Now let me convince
+you practically. Be good enough to stand near this window with
+me."</p>
+<p>Marcus moved to the spot indicated by the artist.</p>
+<p>"Here," said Patching, "you are at about the same distance from
+the desert as the front row of spectators will be. Now look at it
+critically."</p>
+<p>Marcus shaded his eyes with his left hand, cocked his head over
+his right shoulder, in the true critical style, and gazed on the
+scene.</p>
+<p>"Do you see the harmony--the TONE, I may say--in the desert?"
+asked Patching, after a short pause.</p>
+<p>"I think I do," responded Marcus, willing to oblige the
+artist.</p>
+<p>"And the spiritual, or INNER meaning of the sky?"</p>
+<p>"Ye-yes. It is quite perceptible."</p>
+<p>"These are the effects of severe simplicity. But you must
+understand that a single mis-stroke of the brush would have spoiled
+all the harmony in the desert, or reduced the sky to a mere
+inexpressive field of blue vapor. Why? Genius alone can achieve
+such grand results by such apparently simple means. You
+comprehend?"</p>
+<p>"Perfectly," said Marcus Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>"Then I shall take a real pleasure in showing you more of the
+panorama which is already completed and rolled up. With this idea
+of severe simplicity in your mind, you will be prepared to
+appreciate the work,"</p>
+<p>"I believe I have already remarked, that Mr. Wilkeson is a
+capitalist, and comes here expressly to look at the panorama," said
+Tiffles; with a wink at the artist.</p>
+<p>"With every respect for him as a capitalist," returned Patching,
+"I see in him only the ingenuous student of Art, whom it is a
+happiness to teach."</p>
+<p>The first instalment was a continuation of the desert with which
+Marcus had been already regaled. Patching begged him to observe the
+unfaltering harmony of the sand, and the protracted spirituality of
+the sky. Then came a jungle.</p>
+<p>"You will note the severe simplicity here," observed Patching,
+"No meretricious effects. Nothing but strokes of green paint, up
+and down, representing the density of an African jungle. Yet how
+admirably these seemingly careless strokes, laid on by the hand of
+genius, convey the idea of DEPTH! You do not fail to notice the
+DEPTH, I presume?"</p>
+<p>"I see it," said Marcus.</p>
+<p>"<i>That</i> is severe simplicity," replied the artist.</p>
+<p>At this point, Marcus noticed a brown something bearing a strong
+resemblance to the swamp stalk, known among boys as the cattail.
+"Excuse my ignorance of African plants," said he; "but what is
+that?"</p>
+<p>The artist smiled. "Another happy illustration of my theory,"
+said he. "It is the tail of a lion bounding through his native
+jungles. Why? The effect of suggesting the lion, so to speak, is
+much more thrilling than that of painting him at full length.
+Genius accomplishes by hints what mere talent fails to achieve by
+the utmost elaboration. You will not deny that that vague
+revelation of the lion's tail inspires a feeling of mystery and
+terror, which would not be caused by a full-length portrait of that
+king of beasts?"</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson did not deny it, but said that perhaps everybody
+could not identify the object as a lion's tail.</p>
+<p>"That has all been thought of," said Tiffles. "I shall explain
+the panorama, you must understand. When I come to the lion's tail,
+I shall tell the audience what it is, and go on to give a full
+account of the lion, and his ferocious habits. This will gratify
+the women and small boys quite as much as seeing the lion <i>in
+propria persona</i>."</p>
+<p>"Precisely. Very good," was the laughing acknowledgment. "And
+what is that thing, twisted like a piece of grapevine above the
+tall grass at this point?"</p>
+<p>"The trunk of an elephant. Look a little farther on, as the
+canvas unrolls, and you will observe the white tusk of a rhinoceros
+protruding from the jungle with wonderful effect. Why? The two
+animals are advancing toward each other for mortal combat."</p>
+<p>"I shall describe their terrific struggles," interrupted
+Tiffles. "Have read up Buffon for it."</p>
+<p>"More lions' and elephants' tails, you observe," continued the
+artist; "also more rhinoceroses' tusks. It is well to have enough
+of them, to illustrate the teeming life of the African jungle. Also
+the head of a boa constrictor. Likewise the tail of one. Here we
+come to a change of scene. Mark how wonderfully a few strokes of
+dark-green paint, put on by the hand of genius, impart the idea of
+a pestiferous swamp. That odd-looking object, like a rock, is the
+head of a hippopotamus. A few feet beyond, you notice two things
+like the stumps of aquatic weeds. Those are the tails of two
+hippopotamuses engaged in deadly strife at the bottom of the swamp.
+The heads of crocodiles are thrust up here and there. Severe
+simplicity again."</p>
+<p>The panorama, from thence nearly to the end of it--or rather the
+beginning--was a repetition of jungles and deserts, varied by an
+occasional swamp, all diversified with the heads and tails of
+indigenous animals. The last hundred feet was the river Gambier,
+over which Patching had introduced a sunrise of the most gorgeous
+description, at the earnest request of Wesley Tiffles.</p>
+<p>Patching explained: "In my opinion, such effects are tawdry, and
+detract not only from the severe simplicity, but from the UNITY
+which should pervade a painting of this description. Of course, I
+wash my hands of all these innovations upon the province of high
+Art."</p>
+<p>"And I cheerfully shoulder them," said Tiffles. "I know what the
+public want. They want any quantity of sunsets, crocodiles, lions,
+and other objects of interest. If we had time and money to spare,
+and I could overcome Patching's scruples--do you understand?--I
+would put 'em in twice as thick. Men of genius, like Patching,
+cannot be expected to be practical."</p>
+<p>The artist shrugged his shoulders, and smiled.</p>
+<p>Tiffles then repeated his invitation to Marcus to accompany him
+on his first expedition into the interior of New Jersey; but Marcus
+positively declined. Tiffles said he would send him a note a day or
+two before the panorama started, and hoped that Marcus would
+conclude to go, just for the fun of the thing.</p>
+<p>Marcus then shook hands with Patching--who made his long finger
+nail amicably felt--and with Tiffles, and withdrew to the entry,
+followed by the latter individual.</p>
+<p>Tiffles closed the door. "By the way," said he, as if the
+thought occurred to him then for the first time, "can you spare
+thirty-five dollars to-day? Pay you on the--let me see--on the
+first of next month. By that time the panorama will be fairly under
+headway, and coining money." (Tiffles always fixed his days of
+payment with great particularity.)</p>
+<p>Marcus, without saying a word, produced his pocket book, and
+counted out thirty-five dollars. Tiffles had already borrowed from
+Overtop and Maltboy, but had generously spared the oldest of the
+three bachelors. Marcus felt that his time had come, and he would
+not meanly avoid his destiny. He placed the money in Tiffles's
+hand.</p>
+<p>"Give you my note?" asked Tiffles.</p>
+<p>"Oh, no!" said Marcus; "make it a matter of honor."</p>
+<p>Tiffles pocketed the funds, placed his hand over his heart, and
+replied that it should be. "But, now I think of it," he suddenly
+added, "I want exactly sixty-three dollars--do you understand?--to
+see me through with this panorama. Suppose you make it twenty-eight
+dollars more."</p>
+<p>Marcus smiled, and said that he didn't understand; whereat
+Tiffles laughed outright, to show that he took no offence at the
+refusal; and creditor and debtor parted with mutual good
+wishes.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="E_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>LOVING AFAR OFF.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The boy Bog had now become, professionally, a creature of the
+night. He was abroad at the, same hours as the burglars and
+garroters, and other owls and weasels of society. Fink &amp; Co.
+(Bog was the Co.) had secured the bill posting for three theatres
+and one negro-minstrel hall. This they called their heavy business.
+Carrying the huge damp placards, had already given to Bog's
+shoulders a manifest tendency to roundness, which he was constantly
+trying to overcome by straightening up. Fink, who was the veteran
+bill poster of the town, was as round shouldered as a hod carrier.
+But Bog thought of somebody, and stood as nearly erect as he
+could.</p>
+<p>The firm also obtained rather more than their share of ordinary
+bill posting, from doctors, drygoods dealers, and other people who
+find their profit in continually addressing the public from the
+summit of a dead wall, or the muddy level of the curbstones. This
+they called their light business. As it required neither strength
+nor practised dexterity of manipulation, the firm intrusted it to
+assistants.</p>
+<p>There were a dozen of these, all stout, hulking young fellows
+nearly as old as Bog. They took a fancy to bill posting, and worked
+industriously and faithfully at it, because it was nocturnal,
+mysterious, romantic. The half dollar which they each received for
+a night's labor, enabled them to lounge about the streets all day
+in glorious indolence. Sometimes there was a prodigious rush of
+business, and then the firm were obliged to hire an extra force of
+boys.</p>
+<p>Once, when a quack undertook to take the public by storm with
+his "New and Sure Cure for Dyspepsia," Fink &amp; Co. put a colored
+poster as large as a dining table on every wall and high fence
+below Sixty-first street; small oblong bills every ten feet along
+the curbstones of Broadway, Bowery, Wall street, Fulton street,
+Cortlandt street, and Third, Fourth, Fifth, Sixth, Eighth, Madison,
+and Lexington Avenues; besides throwing cheap circulars, folded,
+into the front yards of about four thousand residences in the
+fashionable quarters of the town--all in a single night. This
+immense job took one hundred boys.</p>
+<p>Bog had been in this partnership since the first of January. It
+was now near the close of March. The firm had been very successful.
+Bog had comfortably supported himself and his aunt (whose
+rheumatism got worse in steady proportion as his business
+improved), and had invested more than two hundred and fifty dollars
+in a Wall-street savings bank.</p>
+<p>With this money at his disposal, Bog might have thrown away the
+greasy cap and old coat and trowsers, spotted with paste, in which
+he pursued his occupation. But when Bog was at his business, he was
+not above his business. And he felt none the less attached to his
+old clothes because they were two inches too short in the legs and
+arms, and pinched him a little in all directions.</p>
+<p>But Bog had a better suit, made of neat gray cloth, which he
+wore upon occasions. These occasions happened daily between three
+and four P.M. During that interval, it always fell out that Bog had
+no work to do which he could not postpone as well as not. And
+whether it rained or shone, the occasions brought him, like an
+inexorable fate, through the street where Miss Pillbody's school
+was situated. He would first stride smartly up the opposite
+sidewalk, whistling, and cast ardent glances at the lower windows
+of Miss Pillbody's school, shaded by green curtains with gold
+borders.</p>
+<p>After going two blocks in that direction, he would cross the
+street, whistling yet, and march boldly up the other sidewalk, past
+Miss Pillbody's school, as on an enemy. But if there had been
+anybody to watch him closely--as there was not on that thronged
+street--that body would have seen that Bog's cheeks began to blush,
+and his eyes to be cast down, and his whistle to be fainter, as he
+hurried by the neat three-story brick building with the polished
+doorplate and handsome curtains.</p>
+<p>Then he would loiter for a while in front of McFeeter's grocery,
+two corners remote, and gaze from that safe distance with
+intrepidity upon the abode of enchantment; after which he would
+screw his courage up to the point of marching past the house back
+and forth again, and would then resume his position at McFeeter's,
+and wait until four P.M., or about that time, when the envied door
+of Miss Pillbody's establishment would open, and an angel would
+dazzle upon his sight, with a music book in her hand instead of a
+harp, and a jaunty little chip bonnet on her head instead of a
+golden crown. If the harp and crown had suddenly taken their proper
+places, and a pair of spangled wings had blossomed right out of her
+shoulders, and the radiant creature, thus equipped, had spread her
+pinions and soared up to heaven, the boy Bog would hardly have been
+surprised. As this angel came down the happy front steps to the
+blessed pavement (Bog's mind supplying these adjectives), Bog would
+color up, and sneak off at his best walking pace in the opposite
+direction. He felt that, if Pet ever saw him, and should ask him
+what he was doing in that neighborhood, he should melt away in
+perspiring confusion on the spot.</p>
+<p>He called at Mr. Minford's twice a week, to indulge in the
+hollow form of asking if he could do anything for him. There he
+confronted Pet, with that trembling figure and those averted eyes
+which an inexperienced thief may show before the man that he has
+robbed. But Pet knew not of the adoring spy.</p>
+<p>One afternoon, the boy Bog had made his second detour, and was
+approaching the corner of the favored block, when a novel idea
+struck him. The very night before, Bog had posted bills of the
+play, "Faint Heart Ne'er Won Fair Lady." The gigantic lettering
+arose in his mind's eye, like the cross in Constantine's. He had
+never seen the drama, and he did not know to what extent Ruy Gomez
+pushed his audacity, and won the Countess by it. But the name of
+the drama held the moral of it; and the moral, as applied to Bog's
+case, was: "Stop at this corner, and take a good view of the,
+house." To do this, in Bog's opinion, was the height of boldness.
+But he thought of the huge parti-colored lettering, and he did
+it.</p>
+<p>He stopped at the corner, and leaned recklessly against a
+hydrant. He looked at the house with a deliberation that amazed
+himself. At the same time, as a matter of instinctive caution, he
+kept his left leg well out toward the side street, so that he might
+retreat, should the door suddenly open and disclose the seraphic
+vision. He consulted his large bull's-eye silver watch (a capital
+timekeeper), and found that it was half past three o'clock, and he
+never knew her to be out before four.</p>
+<p>This reflection emboldened him. "Faint Heart Ne'er Won Fair
+Lady," he thought again, and brought back his left leg to an easy
+position, crossing it with his right one against the hydrant. Then
+he feasted, with strange composure, upon the house.</p>
+<p>Neither Bog nor a much wiser metaphysician could explain it; but
+the house, and all around it, seemed to be glorified by the loved
+one within. The newly painted door was bright with love; the
+polished doorplate and bell handle glistened with love. The name
+Pillbody looked, somehow, musical and winning, because the owner of
+that name was the teacher and dear companion of Pet. The carved
+stone roses over the door seemed to be truly the emblems of love.
+It was a silly notion; but, in Bog's eyes, love imparted a not
+unpleasant expression to the grim lions' faces that looked down
+from the roof. But the green window curtains with gold borders were
+the most significant symbols of love, in his eyes. Bog felt that
+curtains of any other color would be wholly out of place in that
+house. The patch of a garden, scarcely bigger than a bathroom, in
+front of the house; the single fir tree that grew up in the middle
+of it; the black iron railing; the door steps, and the
+pavement--all took their share of beatitude from the joy within.
+Bog could hear love rustle in the boughs of the young maple, that
+stood in its long green case like a fancy boot top, at the edge of
+the sidewalk.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="E_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>LEGERDEMAIN.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>As Bog was resting against the hydrant, absorbed in this
+delicious revery, and totally indifferent to the consequences, he
+was startled by a slight tap on the shoulder. He turned quickly,
+and saw--the man he hated--the man who pretended (Bog would never
+admit that it was more than a pretence) to save Pet from the
+falling boards.</p>
+<p>"Well," said Bog, looking on this man as his mortal enemy, "What
+do you want of me?" He spoke in the gruff, defiant manner peculiar
+to children of the city.</p>
+<p>The man's livid face and lead-colored eyes and white teeth all
+combined in a reassuring smile. "Nothing," said he, "my good
+fellow, but to do an errand."</p>
+<p>"I say, now, who'd you take me for, hey?" answered Bog, shaking
+his head at the man, and feeling a tremendous desire to knock his
+shining hat off.</p>
+<p>The man looked up and down Bog's cheap gray suit, and at his
+neatly polished shoes and his clean slouching cap, and then
+said:</p>
+<p>"No offence meant, my lad. But I thought you wouldn't object to
+earning a quarter. You're only to deliver a letter at that house;
+that's all." He pointed to Miss Pillbody's.</p>
+<p>"Hey--what house?" asked Bog, turning pale, with a strange and
+jarring combination of rage, jealousy, envy, and insulted
+dignity.</p>
+<p>"The one with the bright doorplate, green curtains and gold
+borders. I thought you were looking at it as I came up."</p>
+<p>"N-no, I wasn't. And what if I was, hey?"</p>
+<p>"It strikes me you're rather touchy, my young friend," said the
+man, with his conciliatory smile. "Here's the letter, now, and a
+quarter. It's only a few steps. No answer required."</p>
+<p>As Bog caught sight of the letter, done up in the long, rakish
+envelope which had just begun to come into fashion, and faintly
+perfumed, a lucky thought occurred to him.</p>
+<p>The man saw that he wavered. "Only a step," said he. "And here
+is the quarter." He offered it to Bog between a thumb and
+finger.</p>
+<p>"Why don't you deliver the letter yourself?" asked Bog.</p>
+<p>"Oh! oh! for family reasons," answered the man, hesitating.
+"Miss Pillbody there is my aunt, and the lady to whom this letter
+is addressed is my cousin. The old woman and I have had a sort of
+falling out about the young one, you see. These little difficulties
+will occur in the best-regulated families. Come, take the letter.
+I'm in a hurry."</p>
+<p>Bog allowed the letter to be thrust into his hand. He looked at
+it, and saw, as he expected, that it was addressed to "Miss
+Minford, Present." The direction was in a beautiful commercial
+hand, which was at once more hateful in his eyes than the most
+crabbed of writing.</p>
+<p>"All right," said he. "I'll deliver it. Poh! never mind the
+quarter. I won't take it." Bog moved toward the house as he
+spoke.</p>
+<p>"You're a queer fellow, but a good one. Well, you'll accept my
+thanks, at any rate."</p>
+<p>He waited at the hydrant until Bog had delivered the letter.</p>
+<p>Bog walked straight to the house, and up the steps, although his
+face was pale, and his knees trembled.</p>
+<p>He rang the bell with a decisive pull, and, as he did so,
+glanced at the strange man, who nodded approvingly at him.</p>
+<p>He suddenly turned his back on the strange man. With a quick
+movement of the fingers of his right hand, he thrust the letter up
+his coat sleeve: The next instant he whipped a handkerchief out of
+an inside breast pocket, and, with it, a stray copy of a new
+"Dentifrice" circular, which he had been distributing the night
+before. This circular was folded to about the size and shape of the
+letter. With the handkerchief he wiped his face, upon which there
+were real drops of sweat. The circular he slipped into his right
+hand, and then turned toward the strange man again, to show that he
+still held the letter. This bit of legerdemain took about three
+seconds.</p>
+<p>In three seconds more, Bog heard footsteps approaching in the
+entry. What if his angel should come to the door? The thought sent
+a horrible, sickly sensation all over him, and the solid rock
+seemed to tremble beneath his feet.</p>
+<p>The door opened, and something quite the opposite of an angel
+presented itself. It was Bridget; and her red hair was dishevelled,
+her face flushed to the parboiled tint, and her dress uncommonly
+damp and frowsy. A mop which she held in her hand explained
+everything.</p>
+<p>"A circular, if you please," said Bog, in a quivering voice,
+poking the folded paper at her.</p>
+<p>"A succular, is it? Miss Peelbody told me not to take any
+succulars for her. So 'way wid ye." Bridget put her hand on the
+door, and was about to swing it to.</p>
+<p>"It isn't for Miss Pillbody at all," said Bog, fearful lest the
+strange man should see it refused, "but for your own pretty
+self."</p>
+<p>Bridget smiled, for she was conscious that the compliment was
+deserved. She relaxed her hand on the door. "Fat is it?" said
+she.</p>
+<p>"Hush!" said Bog, in a whisper; "a circular about the rights of
+servants, issued by the 'Servants' Mootual Protecting Society.'"
+(Bog thought of the name on the spur of the moment.) "Please take
+it--quick."</p>
+<p>Bridget snatched the circular out of his hand, and was about to
+look at it, bottom side up, for she had not yet attained to the
+mystery of reading, when the musical voice of Miss Pillbody was
+heard at the back of the entry. "Bridget--what is wanted,
+Bridget?"</p>
+<p>"Nothing ma'am, but one of these succular men. Bad luck to him!
+Here, now, take it."</p>
+<p>She made a feint of handing back the circular to Bog, but
+concealed it, with the other hand, in her capacious bosom.</p>
+<p>"Heaven bless ye!" said she, in a low voice, and then slammed
+the door in his face.</p>
+<p>Bog came down the door steps quickly, and saw the strange man
+make a bow and a gesture of gratitude at him, and then disappear
+suddenly round the corner. Bog's first impulse was to follow him at
+a distance; but his curiosity to inspect the slender, perfumed
+letter, overcame it.</p>
+<p>When Bog reached the awning in front of McFeeter's store--a sort
+of haven or putting-in place for him--he pulled out the letter, and
+was about to read it. Then it occurred to him that the situation
+was too much exposed. The strange man might come back, and see him
+with the open letter in his hand. Bog would have enjoyed a personal
+collision with him on any pretext; but to be caught in the act of
+reading the letter, would spoil the strategical advantage that Bog
+now had over him.</p>
+<p>Bog moved on down a side street, and took his stand behind a
+huge wooden column surmounted by a gilded mortar and pestle. Here
+he was about to rip open the envelope, but a glance across the
+street discovered a policeman looking at him. Bog felt guilty and
+awkward. He coughed, and thrust the letter into his pocket, and
+moved on again. The exciting events of the morning had made Bog
+intensely nervous. He did not stop this time until he had gained
+his home.</p>
+<p>His aunt was sitting in the front room, reading a book through a
+huge pair of silver-rimmed spectacles. There was a thick fold of
+flannel about her neck, and she smelt strongly of embrocation. As
+Bog rushed into the room, she groaned audibly, and laid down the
+book, as if it were a wicked enjoyment.</p>
+<p>"I'm so bad to-day, Bog," said she. "Them shootin' pains'll be
+the death of me."</p>
+<p>Bog responded not a word, but dashed across the apartment, and,
+entering his little sleeping room, closed the door, and bolted
+it.</p>
+<p>"Unfeelin' creetur!" said his aunt. She stopped groaning, and
+took up her book and read again.</p>
+<p>Bog seated himself on his hair trunk, and drew out the letter.
+There was a slight discussion within him on the abstract question
+of his right to open it. After turning it over twice, the question
+was decided in the affirmative. He slit the envelope with his
+thumb, and brought to light a billet faultlessly written, as
+follows:</p>
+<p>"Frederick Lynville begs to present his compliments to Miss
+Minford, and to assure her, from the depths of his heart, that his
+feelings toward her are only those of the purest admiration for the
+matchless charms of her mind and person. He takes this method of
+explaining himself, because he has observed with great sorrow that
+Miss Minford has shown a desire to avoid him on several recent
+occasions, when they have accidentally met in the street. It was
+Mr. Lynville's blessed privilege, under Providence, to save Miss
+Minford's life; but he would not be selfish and base enough on that
+account to obtrude himself on Miss Minford's notice. Mr. Lynville
+would die sooner than be guilty of that discourtesy. He is not
+presumptuous enough to ask an answer to this letter. His only
+object in writing it, is to inform Miss Minford that he will not
+venture again upon the impropriety of speaking to her first when
+they next meet. Miss Minford will therefore be free to drop his
+acquaintance, or continue it, as she thinks best. Whatever fate she
+may decide for him, her happiness will still be his constant
+prayer."</p>
+<hr style="width: 25%;">
+<p>Bog was ill versed in the art of complimentary letter writing.
+But the villany here seemed to be clumsily concealed. That the
+letter was full of danger to the object of his boyish idolatry, he
+had no doubt.</p>
+<p>But why did Pet avoid this Frederick Lynville? Did she really
+dislike him? Or----. The thought of his own shyness toward the
+beautiful girl came into his mind like a flash. To avoid might
+be--to love.</p>
+<p>The poor boy dropped the letter, and covered his face with his
+hands, and wept.</p>
+<p>Love is not always selfish; and goodness is sometimes its own
+reward. In that bitter hour of his first real misery, Bog did not
+regret his kindness to the Minfords, or take credit to himself for
+having nobly concealed from their knowledge those little weekly
+gifts of money which he sent to them through the mail, when they
+were in poorer circumstances. He was not for a moment base enough
+to think that Pet would look with kinder eyes on him, if she but
+knew of his secret benefactions--which, up to this time, neither
+she nor her father had suspected, and which they would never learn
+from his lips.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_SIXTH."></a>BOOK SIXTH.</h2>
+<h3>MYSTERIES OF THE NIGHT.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="F_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>THE UNKNOWN HAND.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson made no effort to discover the writer of the
+anonymous letter, because he knew that such an effort would be in
+vain. He called on Mr. Minford once in two or three days now. The
+inventor always took occasion to refer to the letter, and assured
+Marcus that it was not worth remembering, or talking about. "Why,
+then, did he talk about it?" Marcus asked himself. His eyes were
+not blind to watchful and suspicious glances which the old man
+directed to him, at times, under cover of those shaggy, overhanging
+eyebrows. Nor could he help noticing a strange reserve in the
+bearing of Pet toward him. It was not mere modesty, or timid
+gratitude, but DOUBT, as he read the signs. Marcus was convinced
+that the father had put his child on guard against something,
+though he might not have mentioned the existence of the anonymous
+letter. This thought distressed him acutely.</p>
+<p>But his troubles, as well as his joys, he kept to himself. The
+miser puts his broken bank notes and his good gold under the same
+lock and key.</p>
+<p>One evening, early in April, Overtop and Maltboy observed a
+peculiar expression of sadness on the face of their friend. He had
+eaten nothing at dinner, but had drunk more than his usual
+allowance of sherry. He had kept his eyes fixed on the table as in
+a revery, and had scarcely spoken a word. Miss Wilkeson, in her
+solemn state opposite the boiled chickens, was hardly less
+social.</p>
+<p>After dinner, Marcus took to his pipe with a strange sullenness,
+and smoked furiously. His two friends, closely regarding him, saw
+that he was unhappy, but wisely forbore to make him more unhappy
+still by obtruding their condolence on him. The day had been rainy
+and cold. They knew that Marcus's spirits were barometrically
+sensitive to the weather, like those of most persons who look at it
+through a window.</p>
+<p>They had noticed, as they came home, that he was reading that
+sweetest of elegies, the "In Memoriam" of Tennyson. And the two
+friends thought that the melancholy weather and the melancholy poem
+together fully accounted for the gloom on his brow.</p>
+<p>Marcus sat for some minutes meditating. Then he heaved a sigh,
+which was distinctly audible to his two friends. Then he left the
+room without saying a word, and went up stairs.</p>
+<p>Presently he was heard to come down; but, instead of returning
+to the little parlor, he went into the street, and closed the door
+with a sharp slam. At the same moment, the cold rain of the April
+night beat noisily against the window.</p>
+<p>"Sly old fellow!" said Maltboy.</p>
+<p>"Up to something, depend on it," said Overtop.</p>
+<p>Marcus walked rapidly toward the inventor's house. "My fate is
+decided to-night," he muttered.</p>
+<p>His long strides soon brought him to the house. The old building
+wore a gloomy look. He did not speculate on the reason of this. It
+was probably because there was no light visible in any of the front
+windows, and very little light in the street lamps. The gas burned
+low and blue, and flickered in the wind.</p>
+<p>Ringing the bell, Marcus was admitted by one of the numerous
+children belonging to somebody in the house (Marcus could never
+determine to whom), and walked up to the inventor's room. His heart
+beat with strange emotion as he rapped at the door. For a moment he
+was sorry that he had come.</p>
+<p>"Come in," said the inventor, in a voice more sepulchral than
+usual.</p>
+<p>Marcus entered the apartment. The inventor received him with a
+feeble shake of the hand, bearing no resemblance to the hearty one
+which he used to bestow in the early days of their acquaintance.
+Marcus noticed that Mr. Minford's hand was hot. He also observed
+that his eyes were preternaturally lustrous, and that the circles
+under them were deep and dark. His cheeks were deathly pale, saving
+a little red spot in the centres. He looked like a man in a state
+of fearful mental exaltation and nervous excitement.</p>
+<p>Marcus was not in the habit of worrying people upon the subject
+of their ill health; but the inventor looked so palpably bad, that
+Marcus could not forbear to say, in a tone of anxiety, "You are
+unwell, sir."</p>
+<p>"Oh, no! Quite well, I assure you," said the inventor, with a
+weary smile. "Though I should be sick, perhaps, but for the
+glorious hope that bears me up. I have not eaten, or slept, for
+forty-eight hours."</p>
+<p>"But, my dear sir, this is trifling with your health."</p>
+<p>"I acknowledge it. But we must make sacrifices, if we would
+master the UNKNOWN. Newton lived on bread and water when he wrote
+his immortal Principia. He condemned himself to the coarse fare of
+a prison, in order that his intellect might soar untrammelled to
+the stars. I have improved on Newton--I eat nothing. As for sleep,
+I grudge a single hour of it which comes between me and the
+completion of my great work."</p>
+<p>"But how long can you stand this dreadful strain upon your
+powers?"</p>
+<p>"Till daylight to-morrow, with safety. By that time I shall have
+overcome the last obstacle. Of this I am confident. Then, ho! for
+unbounded wealth and undying fame. The toil has been severe, but
+the reward will be glorious."</p>
+<p>"I congratulate you," said Marcus, "on the near approach of your
+final triumph. And, in order that I may not delay you a single
+moment, I will bid you 'good-night.'" Marcus rose, but he hoped
+that the inventor would ask him to stay.</p>
+<p>The inventor did so. "Pray don't hurry, Mr. Wilkeson; I would
+like to have a brief conversation with you. A few minutes only." He
+drew a chair to the side of Marcus, and seated himself.</p>
+<p>"Mr. Wilkeson," he said, in a deliberate voice, as if he were
+repeating carefully-considered words, "it is unnecessary for me to
+say that I have the highest opinion of you. Providence seems to
+have sent you to me at a time when I was in the greatest need. You
+saved me from starving. The world will be as much indebted to you
+for my grand invention, as it was to the generous patronage of
+Queen Isabella for the discovery of America."</p>
+<p>"Pooh!" interrupted Marcus, blushing.</p>
+<p>"The praise is none too high," continued the inventor. "It is
+true, I have repaid your advances of money tenfold, by giving you
+an interest in my future but certain fortune. But that does not
+diminish my gratitude."</p>
+<p>Marcus knew that this flattering exordium meant something
+serious. It was a favorite theory of his, that danger, or any kind
+of anticipated, disagreeable thing, was best met halfway. So he
+said, with a feeble attempt at a smile:</p>
+<p>"I infer from this ominous opening that you have received
+another lying anonymous letter about me. If I am right, Mr.
+Minford, be good enough to let me see it at once, according to your
+promise."</p>
+<p>"You have guessed correctly, Mr. Wilkeson. I have received a
+second anonymous letter, which I intended showing to you after a
+further brief explanation. But I can readily appreciate your
+anxiety to read it without delay. Here it is." He drew forth a
+letter, and handed it to Marcus.</p>
+<p>Marcus immediately recognized the envelope and the address as
+similar to those of the first letter, which he still had in his
+possession.</p>
+<p>He pulled the letter nervously from its yellow sheath, and read
+as follows:</p>
+<blockquote>MR. MINFORD:<br>
+<br>
+DEAR SIR,--Pardon me for intruding on you a second time. But, as a
+friend of virtue, I must warn you of continued danger to your
+daughter from the acquaintance of Mr. Wilkeson, your pretended
+benefactor. If you are any longer in doubt as to the vile
+intentions of this man, conceal yourself from observation within
+sight of Miss Pillbody's school, any fair afternoon, about half
+past two o'clock, and watch his actions. If his suspicious conduct,
+at that time and place, does not give a sufficient significance to
+my warnings, then take the trouble to go to ----, Westchester Co.,
+where he was born, and search into his infamous history. Take
+heed--I warn you again--lest, in your devotion to science, you
+forget that you are a father.<br>
+<br>
+ONE WHO WOULD SHIELD THE INNOCENT.</blockquote>
+<p>While reading this letter, Marcus was conscious that the eyes of
+the inventor were fixed piercingly upon him. That consciousness
+caused his head to bow, and his cheeks to crimson with shame. It is
+the curse of this morbid sensibility, that righteous indignation at
+a foul slander upon one's good name springs up only after the
+victim has shown all the accepted evidences of guilt.</p>
+<p>There was one reason why a man much less sensitive than Marcus
+should have been thrown off his balance by this letter. It was a
+fact that every afternoon, at half past two o'clock, rain or shine,
+with bachelor-like punctuality, he passed up and down in front of
+Miss Pillbody's school, and looked sentimentally at the closed
+blinds, thinking unutterable things. He was also addicted to
+standing at the hydrant on the corner, and gazing hard at the
+house, wishing that he could see through its brick walls. Then he
+would cross the street, and pace up and down on that side, taking
+views of the house at every variety of angle. This was precisely
+what the boy Bog did daily about an hour and a half later. Now,
+although Marcus felt, in his heart, that these pedestrian
+exercises--absurd to everybody but a lover--were perfectly harmless
+in their purpose and effect, he was aware that, to a man like Mr.
+Minford, looking at them suspiciously, they would appear to be
+connected with some stealthy and base design.</p>
+<p>As to the imputations upon his former history, Marcus could
+freely challenge the closest scrutiny; which is more than most men
+can do into that long record of juvenile frailties and escapades
+which ushers in the sober book of manhood. But here again the devil
+of sensitiveness asserted his supremacy. Marcus had had a twin
+brother (who died years before), a duplicate of himself in all
+respects but two. Marcus was quiet, studious, honest, and frank;
+while Aurelius was quiet, studious, less honest, and infinitely
+crafty. Marcus had, on several occasions in his boyhood, been
+accused of petty offences which Aurelius had committed, but which
+that cunning youth had unblushingly denied. These, so far as Marcus
+supposed, were nothing more serious than robbing orchards or melon
+patches. Still it was possible that some graver wrong--more worthy
+of the title "infamous"--committed by his wild, shrewd brother,
+might be brought to light by some deep explorer among the
+traditions of his native village, and charged upon himself. This
+possibility, and the difficulty of refuting a serious accusation
+under such circumstances, brought a second flush of guilt to the
+face of Marcus Wilkeson as he read the letter.</p>
+<p>These harassing thoughts, which fill so much space, written out,
+are but a small part of those which were suggested with electric
+suddenness.</p>
+<p>Marcus's first impulse was to say: "I love your daughter, Mr.
+Minford, with my whole heart and soul. It is my first and my only
+love, singular though this confession may sound from the lips of a
+man of thirty-six years. The proudest and happiest day of my life
+would be that on which I could marry her, with her dear love and
+your fatherly consent. This love, which is as pure as the angelic
+creature upon whom it is lavished, fully explains my visits here,
+and whatever else is mysterious in my conduct. But, before
+declaring myself to your daughter, or asking her hand of you, I
+have desired to see whether it were possible to inspire her with
+love for a man so much older than herself. For, much as I love her,
+I would not seek to marry her without a return of love--not mere
+respect, esteem, or gratitude. That is the problem I have been
+waiting to solve."</p>
+<p>A confession to this effect was on the tip of his tongue. To
+have made it, would have been like tearing open his breast and
+showing his heart. But he would have made it, whatever the pain,
+if, on looking nervously up from the letter, which he had now
+finished, he had not met the cold, searching eyes of the inventor.
+He instantly shut his lips upon the outcoming confession, and said,
+with as much indifference as he could awkwardly assume:</p>
+<p>"I hope, sir, you have taken the trouble to investigate these
+ridiculous charges." But Marcus inwardly hoped he had not.</p>
+<p>"I have sir," responded the inventor, gravely. "Had the
+accusations been vague, like those in the first letter from this
+unknown person, I should have dismissed them from my mind with a
+laugh. But they were so specific, and the truth or falsity of them
+was so easily ascertained, that I thought it my duty, in justice to
+my daughter, yourself, and to me, to look into them. It was a
+painful task, but I have done it."</p>
+<p>"And what have you learned?" asked Marcus, making a transparent
+feint to look at ease.</p>
+<p>"I will tell you frankly; though I wish to say, in advance, that
+my discoveries, though they might justify some suspicion, do not
+prejudice me in the least against you. I have no doubt that you
+will be able to explain everything." But so spoke not the eyes of
+the inventor.</p>
+<p>"Well, then, to make a short story of this unpleasant affair, I
+have watched your promenades in front of Miss Pillbody's school
+three afternoons in succession. I will spare you the details,
+though, so clearly are your movements back and forth imprinted on
+my memory, that I could recount them all to you, if necessary. It
+is sufficient to say, that I am forced to believe that my daughter
+is the magnet which draws you to that neighborhood, and keeps your
+eyes riveted on that house. This is all I have to say on the first
+point in the letter."</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="F_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>IN VAIN--IN VAIN.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>This was Marcus Wilkeson's golden opportunity, and he manfully
+determined to seize it. But, as he was on the point of blurting out
+the stifled secret, that cold, pale face--which resembled marble in
+all but the drops of sweat upon the brow--chilled him again. At the
+same moment, the hopeless absurdity of love and marriage between a
+girl of seventeen and a man of thirty-six, occurred to him in all
+its force. Stupidly sensitive being that he was, he thought that
+this icy, intellectual Mr. Minford would laugh at him.</p>
+<p>"I confess, sir, that these wanderings seem 'singular,' as you
+term them. But all the habits of old bachelors are regarded as
+singular, I believe. Now, it has been my daily habit, since I
+retired from business, to lay down my book at two o'clock, and take
+a little out-door exercise. Miss Pillbody's school is not far from
+my house; the street is pretty clean for New York, and the
+sidewalks are tolerably dry. Therefore I select that neighborhood
+for my daily walk--my--my 'constitutional,' as they call it. If, in
+so doing, I should occasionally cast my eyes--in fits of
+absent-mindedness, I may say--on Miss Pillbody's school, that is
+not strange, considering--considering the interest that I take in
+your daughter's education. It strikes me, my dear sir, that this
+seeming suspicion is easily cleared up." Marcus smiled to think how
+adroitly he had extricated himself.</p>
+<p>But there was no smile on the shroud-colored face of the
+inventor.</p>
+<p>"The explanation is <i>plausible</i>" (Mr. Minford emphasized
+the word), "and I will not attempt to set it aside. God alone knows
+all the motives of human action. Now, to the second, and more
+serious implication of the letter. I have visited your native
+village, and inquired into your early history. Though you moved to
+the city over fifteen years ago, and have returned to your
+birthplace but once since, so far as I could ascertain--"</p>
+<p>"Allow me," said Marcus. "My absence from my old home may seem
+strange, but it is occasioned by no shame or disgrace. My father,
+mother, and twin brother died and were buried there. By my father's
+failure, shortly before his death, the old family mansion passed
+out of his hands, and was afterward torn down to make room for a
+railway depot. This extinction of my family--for I am now left
+without a relation in the world, excepting a half-sister--and this
+destruction of our old home, have made my native village horrible
+to me. When I visited the scene of desolation, ten years ago, the
+village seemed to me like a huge graveyard, in every part of which
+some happiness of my boyhood was entombed; and I vowed that I would
+never go near it again. In the matter of family recollections, I am
+exquisitely sensitive."</p>
+<p>"I respect your feelings, sir," said the inventor, "and regret
+that I should be the means of reviving these painful recollections.
+But I have, a duty to perform."</p>
+<p>"And I will no longer delay you in its performance. Now be kind
+enough to let me know the worst at once. I can stand it." Marcus
+unconsciously sat up more erect, as if to brace himself against a
+shock.</p>
+<p>"On my arrival in the village, my first act was to seek out some
+of the oldest inhabitants. I found that most of them distinctly
+remembered you, and your brother--Aurelius, I think, was his name.
+You will pardon me for telling you the exact result of my
+inquiries, but I found that these old inhabitants, without a single
+exception, gave you a very bad name, and your brother a very good
+one."</p>
+<p>Marcus was about to explain, that his brother and himself were
+images of each other; that the former was crafty, and full of
+mischief, and that he (Marcus) had been made, on fifty occasions,
+the innocent scapegoat of his brother's little offences. But he
+forbore. He had cheerfully received reprimands, and even
+chastisements, for his brother while living; and he would not
+blacken his memory when dead. He merely smiled a sad smile, and
+said, "Ah?"</p>
+<p>"Many of the offences charged against you by these old gossips,
+were petty and excusable. But there were others, committed by you
+when you were at or near manhood, exhibiting, if true--understand,
+I say, <i>if</i> true--a moral depravity for which no extenuation
+can be found. Some of the charges were not sustained by adequate
+proofs, and those I set down as idle rumors. But there was one of
+which the proof was abundant and most positive. No less than five
+persons gave me circumstantial accounts--all agreeing with each
+other--of your betrayal and ruin of Lucy Anserhoff."</p>
+<p>"Lucy Anserhoff!" echoed Marcus, in real amazement. "I have a
+faint remembrance of an old lady by that name, and a pretty girl
+who was her daughter. But as God is my judge, I never wronged her."
+Still there was that expression of guilt, which did not escape the
+scrutinizing glance of the inventor.</p>
+<p>Marcus could have hunted up evidence to transfer the burden of
+the imputed wrong to the memory of the dead Aurelius. But should he
+commit this profanation of the grave--as he regarded it? The voice
+of brotherly love--for he had tenderly loved his erring
+brother--said, "No." Would any amount of proof satisfy the nervous,
+doubting man before him? He feared not. Therefore Marcus Wilkeson
+did an act of awful solemnity, to prove his innocence. And, because
+the doing of it thrilled his sensitive soul, as if he had thrust
+himself into the terrible presence of the Infinite, he weakly
+supposed that the most suspicious of men would unhesitatingly
+believe him.</p>
+<p>He stood up, turned his eyes to the ceiling, raised both hands,
+and said, in a deep, trembling voice:</p>
+<p>"May God strike me dead, if I am guilty of this offence, or any
+like it, or of any thought of wrong toward your daughter."</p>
+<p>Marc as sat down, pale, and caught his breath quickly. He was
+awestricken by his own act.</p>
+<p>"That is a solemn adjuration," said the inventor, after a short
+pause, "and should not be lightly taken."</p>
+<p>Marcus looked well at Mr. Minford. Unbelief was written in every
+hard line and wrinkle of that white, deathlike face. "Do you doubt
+me now?" he asked, sharply. His sensitiveness on the subject of
+personal honor and veracity was painfully acute. He had never told
+a lie in his life.</p>
+<p>"Oh! no," replied Mr. Minford; "I do not say that I doubt you"
+(in a tone expressive of the greatest doubt). "I shall be truly
+glad to receive counter proofs from you."</p>
+<p>"You have heard my solemn appeal to God, sir. Between gentlemen
+of honor that should be sufficient."</p>
+<p>The inventor's thin lips (from which the last drops of blood had
+disappeared within the last half hour) curved in a satirical smile.
+Marcus interpreted it as a reiterated doubt and a sneer upon his
+honor. For the moment he lost control of his temper, and was about
+to make a remark that he would have regretted immediately after,
+when the door yielded to a gentle pressure, and Pet entered the
+room.</p>
+<p>Her face was pale. Her eyes were dull, and the lids hung
+droopingly, weighed down by twenty-four hours of wakefulness by the
+bedside of her sick teacher. The faint blue crescents
+beneath--those strange shadows of the grave, which sometimes seem
+the deepest when the eyes above are giving the brightest
+light--imparted a frail, delicate beauty to her countenance. They
+were the last master-touches of Nature in working out that
+portraiture of weaned and sleepy loveliness.</p>
+<p>As she put her foot in the room, Mr. Minford and his guest
+telegraphed a truce with their eyes, and assumed a cheerful
+look.</p>
+<p>Little Pet timidly ran to her father, and kissed him, and then
+shook hands with Marcus. He observed a shrinking in her touch. She
+averted her eyes.</p>
+<p>"Your clothes are damp, and your feet wet, my darling," said the
+father,</p>
+<p>"Are they?" answered Pet, looking down at her saturated garments
+and glistening shoes. "I had not noticed them. Oh! I am so happy
+that she is well now. The doctor called at the house just before I
+left, and said she was out of all danger. He ordered me home."</p>
+<p>"Very sensible of the doctor. Another hour of this watching
+might have killed my poor child."</p>
+<p>"So I took a last look at my dear teacher--who was asleep--and
+kissed her, and came right away through the rain."</p>
+<p>"It was foolish to do that without an umbrella and overshoes, my
+child. But, as you were always forgetful of yourself, your father
+will not be forgetful of you, at any rate." The inventor glanced
+significantly at Marcus. That glance, so full of distrust, entered
+his soul. He longed to say something--if only a word of common
+civility--to the young girl; but he felt that there was now an
+impassable barrier between them.</p>
+<p>"But what is the matter, Pet?" exclaimed the father. She had
+dropped into a chair, and her head fell on one side. He sprang to
+catch her. So did Marcus. But the inventor reached her first, and
+seized her in his arms, directing another of his speaking looks at
+Marcus.</p>
+<p>Pet roused herself at the touch of her father's hands, sat
+erect, and opened her large blue eyes. "I am so sleepy," she
+said.</p>
+<p>"Of course you are, my blessed; and to bed you must go at once.
+That is my prescription. But, first--always first--a cup of
+tea."</p>
+<p>The inventor darted to the stove, snatched up the teapot, poured
+out a cup of the universal restorer, scalding his forefinger in the
+hurry, milked and sugared it just right, and bore it to his
+daughter, who was nodding again. She drank it dutifully, like
+medicine.</p>
+<p>Children do not comprehend tea. We have to grow up to it. It is
+the appointed balm of fatigued and sorrowing middle age.</p>
+<p>In its function of medicine, the strong draught revived her,
+giving a twist to her pretty features, and sending a lively shudder
+through her slender frame. Pet rose from her seat quite
+briskly.</p>
+<p>"Now to bed. To bed at once. No delay. And mind you put on all
+the blankets, and your heavy shawl a-top of them."</p>
+<p>"Yes, father."</p>
+<p>Marcus blushed, twirled his hat, and made a motion toward the
+door.</p>
+<p>"You need not go, Mr. Wilkeson," said the inventor. "I beg that
+you will not. I wish to settle up that little unfinished business
+with you to-night."</p>
+<p>Marcus saw that the inventor was in earnest. He coughed, and
+hesitated what to say.</p>
+<p>But, before he could say anything, Pet had kissed her father,
+and said "Good-night," in a faint voice, to the guest, and already
+had her hand on the knob of the door which led to her little
+sleeping room.</p>
+<p>"Remember, darling--all the blankets, and your shawl. To-morrow
+morning you will wake up bright and happy, and ready to enjoy a
+little surprise that I shall have for you." He jerked his thumb
+toward the machine.</p>
+<p>Pet understood him, and smiled sadly. "You need bed more than I,
+father," said she.</p>
+<p>"Nonsense, child!" replied the old man, with a hollow laugh. "It
+is not for the patient to prescribe to the physician. There,
+good-night, now."</p>
+<p>He kissed her again with more tenderness. "Remember," said he,
+"there is a little surprise in store for you to-morrow."</p>
+<p>Pet said, "Heaven bless you, father," murmured another
+"Good-night," and disappeared within her sanctuary, closing the
+door after her.</p>
+<p>"Now, Mr. Wilkeson," said the inventor, "we can finish our
+conversation."</p>
+<p>His voice sounded like a voice from the tomb.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="F_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>THE CLASHING ORBS.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The rain had ceased, and the moon was out. The dark, massy
+clouds that floated between her and the earth were doing their
+ghostly, phantasmagoric work. At one moment, clear, white light,
+like a shroud; at another moment, darkness, like a pall. An owl,
+lighting on the spire of Grace Church in his flight over the city,
+might have seen the white edge of the shroud, or the black edge of
+the pall, advancing in well-defined lines over the housetops, and
+the parks, and the two rivers, swiftly succeeding each other.</p>
+<p>It was as if the mighty invisible demons of the night were
+capriciously trying the effects of cerements on the sleeping city.
+It was as if they were perplexed between the soft beauty of the
+shroud and the sombre majesty of the pall. A woman could not have
+tried on two shawls more often and more indecisively, before making
+up her mind to buy.</p>
+<p>Little Pet's sleeping room, like every room that faced the
+south, that night, was full of strange, spectral effects. The
+scrolls and the roses on the cheap yellow curtains that hung in the
+windows, were changed to hideous faces of variable size and
+ugliness. Their grotesque shadows on the floor mingled with other
+faces--horrible as antique masks--wrought by the magic of the moon
+from the gigantic flowers that adorned the narrow strip of carpet
+by the bedside. Her dresses, suspended from a row of hooks in the
+corner--and showing, in gentle swells and curves, the lithe,
+graceful form of the little wearer, like moulds,--would have looked
+to any open eye, that dreadful night, like women hanging against
+the wall. This startling idea would have been helped along by two
+or three shadowy bonnets depending from pegs above them. The white
+somethings carelessly tossed over a chair near the head of the bed,
+were no longer the garments of youth, beauty, and innocence, but
+graveclothes, cold, shining, shuddering, in that deathly light. The
+touch of the moon, like the presence of a sexton, suggested
+mortality.</p>
+<p>The narrow, single bed, with its four black posts, looked like
+the fatal trestle, or bier. The slender body which lay upon it was
+still as death. The head nestled motionless in a deep indentation
+of the pillow. A slanting ray of the moon, coming between one of
+the window curtains and the window, fell upon the face, and showed
+it white and waxen; the lips, still red, parted to the gleaming
+teeth; and the eyes not quite covered by the lids. One beautiful
+round arm curved above her head, and some of her soft brown hair
+rested in the little open palm. The other stretched down toward the
+centre of the bed, as if fearlessly to invite the touch of those
+weird things with which imagination peoples the solemn night--which
+the wakeful eye, in the still, small hours, sees moving in the
+darker corners, or passing swiftly by the bedside, or hovering in
+the air, wearing the semblance of one's dead friends, or filling
+large portions of the room with some formless presence of
+unutterable malignity and woe.</p>
+<p>It was only sleep to which the moon thus gave the pale polish of
+death. The gentle murmur of a childish breath broke the silence.
+The heavy bedclothes slowly rose and fell with the mysterious
+pulsations of warm life beneath. At intervals, a shudder shook the
+little figure of the sleeper, her breath came louder and quicker,
+and her arms moved with sudden starts. Pet was dreaming, under the
+joint influences of an excess of blankets and a cup of strong
+tea.</p>
+<p>She was alone in infinite space. Above, below, on all sides, was
+a leaden atmosphere. Neither sun, nor moon, nor stars illumined it,
+but only some dull, phosphorescent light, which seemed to be born
+of the murky, stagnant air. It was such a strange, sickly, wavering
+gleam as she had seen above decaying wood, fish, and other
+substances. All around was absolute stillness. Not a swallow waved
+his wing nor an insect hummed in that barren immensity. Nature was
+hushed by some deadly spell.</p>
+<p>Yet the dread silence portended the near approach of HORRORS.
+She knew what they were, for she had been in this frightful region
+often before, and was familiar with its dread phenomena. They came.
+They were only two little black specks--like motes in the
+sunbeams--scarcely visible to her strained vision at first. She
+gazed upon them with the fascination of a charmed bird on the two
+small jet eyes of a serpent; but with this difference, that she
+knew the terrible peril that they brought. The moment that these
+two motes became visible to her in that dimly lighted mist, they
+commenced revolving around each other.</p>
+<p>They revolved slowly, and increased in size as they rolled on.
+The slowness of the motion and the swelling of the motes were
+elements of horror. But she could not take her eyes from those two
+black objects revolving like binary stars, until her breath should
+cease to come and go, and her heart to beat. As the motes enlarged,
+their orbits widened. And they grew and-grew, performing greater
+and more awful circuits--still slowly, still noiselessly. The
+eternal, unbroken silence was another element of horror. The doomed
+spectatress of this solemn, maddening whirl would fain have
+shrieked, or even whispered, to break the silence, but she could
+not. Either her powers of articulation had disappeared in that
+region of universal dumbness, or the dead atmosphere was waveless,
+and could vibrate to no sound. She knew, by harrowing experience,
+the scene that was to come, and she prayed inwardly to God to
+strengthen her for it.</p>
+<p>The two black objects swelled and swelled in even proportions,
+until they became as large as a full moon just seen above the
+horizon; then to the size of two full moons, and a dozen, and a
+hundred, and a thousand. Still black, still noiseless, still
+revolving slowly, like a tardy but certain doom. Then a quarter of
+the leaden space was filled with their gigantic bodies, and the
+lurid air was darker. Then a half of the heavens was blotted out;
+She grew faint and sick, as she moved her head to the right and
+left, and up and down, and watched the dizzy revolutions of those
+vast orbs, between which she knew that she was to be crushed at
+last, as by the nether and upper millstones. Her inarticulate cries
+to God were unheard. It seemed as if there were no God for that
+accursed part of the universe.</p>
+<p>Majestically, slowly, silently ever, the orbs increased. Two
+strips of the sky could be seen constantly changing positions, but
+always opposite to each other. These were the gaps, fast narrowing,
+which were to be filled up by the swelling worlds before her
+destruction was accomplished. Her long familiarity with the
+movements of this stupendous enginery of death enabled her to
+calculate to a nicety when the crash would come. She lay like the
+bound victim under the guillotine, watching fer the axe to
+descend.</p>
+<p>The blackness of darkness above and beneath and around her ... a
+suffocating compression of the stagnant air ... a thrilling
+consciousness of the close approach of the two cruel orbs.... a
+superlative stillness ... and then a mighty attrition, in which the
+mortal part of the poor girl was about to be ground to atoms, when
+she ... awoke.</p>
+<p>She threw back the heavy blankets that oppressed her chest, as
+if <i>they</i> were the crushing danger. She looked overhead,
+expecting to see a whirling globe within a foot of her face. But
+she saw only the ceiling, made visible by the pallid light of the
+room. Then she knew that she was in her own little room, and that
+this frightful adventure was only the old, old dream, that came to
+her two or three times a year, as far back as she could
+remember--the same always, without addition or curtailment.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="F_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>A VISION OF HORRORS.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Little Pet was not the least superstitious; because her father
+had taught her from infancy to pay no heed to dreams or signs; and
+because he had allowed no housemaid or fussy old woman to inoculate
+his young daughter with her own senseless and cowardly fears. Pet
+smiled at the momentary terror which the strange old dream had
+caused, closed her eyes, and addressed herself again to sleep. But,
+first, she drew up the weighty blankets over her little frame, as
+her father had told her to do. She had already found out by
+experience, that a hot application of blankets was the best remedy
+for a young cold.</p>
+<p>A low murmur, as of conversation, came from the adjoining room.
+Then she remembered that Mr. Wilkeson was there when she had come
+to bed. She said to herself: "It cannot be late; for he never stops
+after ten o'clock." Then she began to think of some matters which
+had recently perplexed and distressed her greatly. But she was so
+sleepy, that the thoughts came into her little head confusedly,
+and, several times, merged into dreams, and then came out again.
+The low murmur of the talk outside, like the distant hum of a
+waterfall or a mill, was sedative. The act of listening to it--as
+she did for a few moments with natural curiosity--was provocative
+of sleep.</p>
+<hr style="width: 25%;">
+<p>The conversation suddenly grew louder. The hollow voice of the
+inventor, and the deep bass of Marcus Wilkeson, could be heard
+alternating quickly. These words reached little Pet:</p>
+<p>THE INVENTOR. "We have had along conversation, Mr. Wilkeson, and
+I will end it by saying that it is best for us to separate, now and
+forever."</p>
+<p>MARCUS (<i>bitterly</i>). "As you please, sir; but it is hard
+that a man's reputation should be at the mercy of any scoundrel who
+knows how to write a libel, and has not courage enough to
+acknowledge it."</p>
+<p>THE INVENTOR (<i>pettishly</i>). "I have told you a dozen times,
+that I despise anonymous letter writers. They are ever liars and
+cowards."</p>
+<p>MARCUS. "But you respected this one enough to adopt his
+suggestions."</p>
+<p>THE INVENTOR. "So the magistrate uses hints that may be
+furnished him by professional thieves, for the detection of crime.
+But he, none the less, loathes those who would inform upon their
+comrades."</p>
+<p>MARCUS. "You believe, therefore, only what you have seen or
+heard for yourself."</p>
+<p>THE INVENTOR. "Nothing further, I assure you. In all matters of
+proof, it is my nature to be suspicious."</p>
+<p>MARCUS. "But none of these accusations against me have been
+proved."</p>
+<p>THE INVENTOR. "Why protract this painful conversation? It is
+sufficient for me to say that we must part.--(<i>Excitedly</i>.)
+Good heavens, sir! am I not the guardian of my daughter, and
+warranted in accepting or rejecting acquaintances for her? Must I
+make long explanations to everybody that I don't see fit to admit
+into my house and my daughter's society? Is not this a free
+country, sir?"</p>
+<p>MARCUS <i>(with deep despair in his voice</i>). "Perfectly free,
+sir. I admit your rights. And I hereby pledge myself not to intrude
+upon you or her--at least, until you are convinced of the great
+injustice of your conduct toward me, and invite me again to your
+house. But there is one thing more!"</p>
+<p>THE INVENTOR (<i>impatiently</i>). "One thing more! will this
+dialogue never end? Well, sir. What the devil is it?" Then he
+added, as if aware of the coarseness and gross impropriety of that
+expression. "Excuse me, sir, but it is late, and my machine is
+waiting."</p>
+<p>MARCUS (<i>slowly and firmly</i>). "One moment, sir. I have
+sworn my innocence before God, with the most solemn oath known to
+man. I may have misconstrued your remarks, but I thought you still
+doubted me. It is my misfortune to be extremely sensitive upon the
+point of honor. Having relinquished your acquaintance and that
+of--of--your daughter, it is now my duty to ask whether you presume
+to question my oath?"</p>
+<p>THE INVENTOR (<i>with increased impatience</i>). "Why should I
+be bored with this cross-examination? I have never said I doubted
+your oath."</p>
+<p>MARCUS (<i>quickly</i>). "That is not an answer. Do you believe
+me, or disbelieve me? Am I a liar and perjurer, or not? In one
+word; yes, or no!"</p>
+<p>THE INVENTOR (<i>laughing nervously</i>). "Will you bully me in
+my own house, sir? There is the door. Out of it!"</p>
+<p>There was a noise like the opening of a door.</p>
+<p>MARCUS (<i>between his teeth</i>). "Never, sir. Never, until you
+retract your imputation upon my honor."</p>
+<p>THE INVENTOR (<i>losing all control of himself</i>). "Curse your
+honor. If you had been more careful of it in your native
+village--where you are best known--it would not trouble you now.
+Come, there are the stairs."</p>
+<p>MARCUS. "Once more. Do you believe my oath, or not?"</p>
+<p>THE INVENTOR (<i>shouting</i>). "No! no! a million times, no!
+since you drive me to it. I believe you to be a crafty scoundrel,
+who has been trying to ruin my daughter. Out, sir, now--out!"</p>
+<p>Then was a sound of two men clenching, and struggling toward the
+door. A noise followed like that caused by the sharp closing of the
+door; but the two men were still in the room, for their scuffling
+and their short, quick grunts of exertion could be heard with
+increased distinctness. The noise indicated that one was pushing
+the other toward the centre of the room. Then followed the dull,
+nauseating sound of blows, apparently struck with fists upon heads
+and chests, mingled with noisier but still partly suppressed
+groans, and defiances.</p>
+<p>The conversation which preceded this struggle, had come to Pet's
+ears with such distinctness, and made such a terrifying impression
+upon her mind, that it seemed as if she could see the
+combatants.</p>
+<p>At the time when the clenching commenced, the vision was faint,
+as if she were looking into a dark room. But, as the struggle
+proceeded, the room seemed to be gradually lighted up for her; and
+every grapple, every blow, every facial contortion of this horrible
+contest, were plainly visible. And yet she was not in the room, but
+lying in her little bed, bound as in the awful dream of the
+clashing orbs. She knew she was there, and yet she felt that her
+eyes, all her faculties of observation, had been somehow
+transferred to her father's room, and that she was actually seeing
+and hearing the commission of a murder there.</p>
+<p>She tried to cry aloud, but her jaws were closed. She would have
+risen, entered the room, and thrown herself between the frenzied
+men, but neither hand nor foot could she move. Her body was
+fastened to the bed as if with adamantine chains, while her mind
+and soul were the voiceless spectators of a tragedy of which she
+knew that she was the cause. She could not even open her eyes. If
+she could have loosed but a muscle from the rigidity of the trance,
+she knew that her whole frame would be relaxed in an instant. Then
+she would have bounded--oh! with what speed--into the other room,
+where her immortal part was helplessly watching the conflict, and
+interceded at the risk of her life. Alas! Prometheus was tied to
+the rock not more firmly than she to that bed of anguish!</p>
+<p>The struggle went on. The inventor, though past the prime of
+life, and worn down by excessive thought, had some strength left.
+Its duration was brief; but it was not to be despised while it
+lasted. He grasped the tall figure of Marcus Wilkeson by the neck
+with one arm, and with the other struck dozens of blows upon his
+face and chest. The comparative youth and freshness of Marcus were
+unable to free him from the strong hold of this vigorous old man.
+Pangs of terror shot through the heart of the poor girl as she saw
+that her father was about to become a murderer. Then the tide of
+fortune changed. Marcus, bruised and black in the face, and panting
+with exertion, released himself from the inventor's clutch, and, in
+turn, caught him by the throat. With his long arm he held the
+furious old man at a safe distance. The unhappy girl was now
+agonized with fears for her father's life.</p>
+<p>"This is madness. Let us stop it." Thus Pet heard Marcus
+Wilkeson say, in panting accents.</p>
+<p>What demoniac spell was it that prevented her from
+shrieking--"Stop it. In God's name, father, stop?"</p>
+<p>"Never!" said the undaunted old man. "Never, till I have thrown
+you headlong down stairs! Liar! Villain!"</p>
+<p>With that, Pet saw her father hurl himself, with the ferocity of
+a tiger, on Marcus Wilkeson. Such was the suddenness and
+impetuosity of the movement, that Marcus was pushed back several
+feet toward the door, from the centre of the room, where the most
+obstinate part of the struggle had taken place.</p>
+<p>But the old man's supremacy was short lived. The younger and
+stronger man suddenly stooped, caught the inventor with both hands
+under the arms, and thrust him toward the corner occupied by the
+mysterious machine. The inventor would have fallen on it, and
+perhaps have been instantly killed by contact with some portion of
+the brass or iron work, but for the interposition of the screen.
+This broke his fall. He scrambled to his feet, full of rage, and
+foaming at the mouth.</p>
+<p>Marcus stepped back, and said, "Now let it cease."</p>
+<p>Pet saw her father snatch something that looked like a club,
+from some part of the machine.</p>
+<p>"This is my answer," he said, and precipitated himself with
+fresh fury upon Marcus.</p>
+<p>The younger man had expected the attack, and braced himself for
+it. He caught the inventor by the arm that held the club, or other
+weapon. They wrestled for its possession--the inventor with frenzy
+in every feature, Marcus with fixed determination, and
+silently.</p>
+<p>The weapon was now aloft--now below--now shifted in the
+twinkling of an eye to the right, and now to the left. At one time
+the inventor seemed to be on the point of securing it; at another,
+Marcus. Suddenly Pet saw it whirl like a shillelah above her
+father's head, with a strange noise like the quick winding of a
+clock. Then she heard a dull sound, as of striking a board with a
+brick, and--she saw her father fall to the floor. At the same
+moment, the light in the room went out, and all was darkness.</p>
+<p>The pent-up agony at last found utterance. She shrieked, and,
+instantly, her eyes were open, and her limbs free. She jumped out
+of bed, and was about to rush into the chamber of horrors, when she
+saw the bright light of the gas yet shining through the crack
+beneath her door. She listened. The house was still as the grave.
+Not a sound from all the world outside, except the striking of a
+fire alarm for the seventh district. The deep notes vibrated upon
+her quickened hearing like a knell.</p>
+<p>Then she remembered that, in the vision, the light had
+disappeared. Here it was gleaming under her door as brightly as
+ever. "Pshaw! what a silly girl I am!" said she. "It was a
+nightmare. That's all." She raised her hands to her face. It was
+hot and dripping.</p>
+<p>"Father prescribed too large a dose of blankets. No wonder I had
+this horrid dream."</p>
+<p>But, notwithstanding the presence of the light, and the absence
+of all noise, such as would be caused by the murderer in leaving
+the room and going down stairs, the impression of this tragic
+vision upon her mind was not to be dismissed with a "Pshaw!"</p>
+<p>Pet would have derived much relief from opening the door and
+looking in, and seeing, with her own waking eyes, that her father
+was alive, at his usual seat in the corner. She placed her hand
+upon the latch.</p>
+<p>But then she remembered how her father had laughed at her, two
+or three times before, when she was a younger girl, and not so wise
+as now, and had rushed into his room screaming with fright from a
+nightmare. She prided herself on having outgrown childish
+fears.</p>
+<p>She also remembered that her father had told her, two days
+before, that he was engaged in the most difficult mathematical
+calculations, day and night, and, kissing her, had playfully said
+that she must not disturb him.</p>
+<p>"He is thinking over his problems now," thought little Pet.
+"Dear father! I <i>do</i> wish he would give up that hateful
+machine. It will be the death of him. But he said I must not
+disturb him, and I will not. Mr. Wilkeson must have gone home a
+long time ago; and dear father is thinking, as he calls it, with
+his hand on his forehead, in the old corner. Let me take one little
+peep through the keyhole, and go to bed again."</p>
+<p>Pet stooped, and looked through the keyhole. Within her range
+were the chair where Marcus Wilkeson had sat that evening, and the
+nail where--with bachelor-like precision--he always hung his hat.
+Neither Marcus Wilkeson nor his hat were in their accustomed,
+places. "What silly things these dreams are!" thought little Pet.
+The keyhole did not command the corner of the room where the
+machine stood, and where the inventor pondered and toiled; but Pet
+felt as certain that he was there, coaxing thoughts out of his pale
+brow with that habitual caress of the hand, as if she had seen
+him.</p>
+<p>"Good night, dear father," she whispered, softly. "May Heaven
+watch over your labors, and keep you from all harm."</p>
+<p>With this pious prayer, she slid into her warm nest. But, before
+adjusting her limbs for sleep, she threw off a portion of the heavy
+blankets which had weighed upon her, and was soon sound asleep, and
+dreaming of a garden in which all the roses were beautiful new
+bonnets.</p>
+<p>Still the moon played her ghastly metamorphoses in the little
+chamber. And the figures on the carpet and the figures on the
+curtain writhed in horrible contortions of glee, as if they
+rejoiced over a calamity which had befallen that house.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="F_CHAPTER_V."></a>CHAPTER V.</h2>
+<h3>WHAT THE MORNING BROUGHT.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The child woke about seven o'clock. She knew the time by the
+sun's rays upon the window curtains. In that strong, cheerful
+light, the phantom faces had shrunk back to great red bunches of
+flowers again. She thought of the absurd dream, or vision, as of
+something that had happened ages ago, and wondered that she had
+been foolish enough to be frightened by it.</p>
+<p>There was no noise in her father's room. But that was not
+strange, for he rarely retired to bed before three o'clock in the
+morning (even when he did not sit up all night), and slept till
+eight. His sleep, though short, was sound; and it was Pet's custom
+to prepare breakfast in her father's room without waking him.</p>
+<p>She washed her face, which looked rosy and bewitching in the
+little cracked mirror, and dressed her hair in two simple bands
+down the cheeks, and put on a white calico dress with small red
+spots, and a white apron bound with blue. This was the dress that
+her father loved the best. She looked in the glass, and examined
+her damaged reflection with a charming coquetry, and said, "Pet,
+child, you are looking well to-day. Now for breakfast."</p>
+<p>Pet walked to the door, humming her last music lesson in a low
+voice.</p>
+<p>She placed her hand upon the latch, and opened the door softly.
+As it swung on its hinges, and she began to obtain a glimpse of the
+room, she noticed the gas still burning, though the daylight filled
+the apartment. This was strange. A shudder passed through her
+frame, and her cheeks began to pale.</p>
+<p>"Pooh! what nonsense!" she said. She pushed the door wide
+open.</p>
+<p>Was it another mocking, maddening vision that she saw? She
+rubbed her eyes in wild affright, and then raised her hands aloft
+with a piercing shriek.</p>
+<p>There, before her, lay the dead body of her father. In the
+centre of his ghastly forehead was a small wound, from which the
+blood had trickled over the temples, bedabbling his thin gray
+hairs, and forming a small red pool by his side. Near him, on the
+floor, was a club with an iron tip, which had done the dreadful
+deed. She recognized it at once as a part of the machine.</p>
+<p>The monstrous vision of the night was true! Her father was dead!
+Mr. Wilkeson was his murderer! She was an orphan!</p>
+<p>These agonizing thoughts flashed through her brain in the single
+instant. She felt her head turning, and her limbs failing under
+her. She had only strength to shriek, "Murder! murder! Help! help!"
+and then she fell headlong and senseless upon her father's dead
+body.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_SEVENTH."></a>BOOK SEVENTH.</h2>
+<h3>JOURNEYINGS AGAINST FATE.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="G_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>PEA-SHOOTING AS A SCIENCE.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Be it said to the credit of Wesley Tiffles, that he always paid
+bills promptly when he could borrow money to do it. The funds that
+he had raised from Marcus Wilkeson, and others, for the panorama,
+had been faithfully applied to that great object. If he could have
+borrowed money from other people to repay those loans, that act of
+financial justice would also have been done; and so on without end,
+like a round robin.</p>
+<p>When Tiffles bestowed the last instalment of compensation upon
+Patching, that individual shrugged his shoulders, and smiled. "The
+paltry price of artistic degradation," said he. "Remember, I would
+have done this job only for a friend. The world must not know it is
+a Patching--though I fear that even on this hasty daub I have left
+marks of my style which will betray me."</p>
+<p>"You are safe, my dear fellow," said Tiffles. "I have already
+ordered the posters and bills; and the name of Andrea Ceccarini
+will appear thereon as the artist. Ceccarini has an Italian look,
+which is an advantage; and, you will pardon me for saying, is
+rather more imposing than Patching."</p>
+<p>The artist was sensitive touching his name. It had been punned
+upon in some of the comic papers. He could not take offence at the
+innocent remark of a friend, but he felt hurt, and vindictively
+rammed the large roll of one-dollar bills into his vest pocket
+without counting them. (Whenever it was practicable, Tiffles paid
+his debts in bills of that denomination. He had a theory that the
+amount looked larger, and was more satisfactory to the
+receiver.)</p>
+<p>As Tiffles saw how lightly the artist regarded the money, not
+even counting it, he felt a momentary pang at the thought that he
+had paid him.</p>
+<p>The panorama of Africa had not only been finished and paid for,
+but it had been exhibited to a large number of clergymen of all
+denominations, at the lecture room of an up-town church. The
+clergymen, being debarred from attending secular amusements, as a
+class, had gladly accepted the invitation of "Professor Wesley"
+(Tiffles's panoramic name), and brought with them their wives and a
+number of children apiece.</p>
+<p>The panorama was rigged up at the end of the lecture room, in
+front of the desk, under the personal supervision of a former
+assistant of Banvard's, and worked beautifully, saving an
+occasional squeak in the rollers.</p>
+<p>Tiffles, in his character of Professor Wesley, told his story
+glibly and with perfect coolness, interspersing the heavier details
+with amusing anecdotes, which made the ministers smile, and brought
+out a loud titter of laughter from the ministers' wives, and
+tremendous applause, inclusive of stamping and the banging of hymn
+books, from the ministers' children.</p>
+<p>One of the children, with the love of mischief peculiar to that
+division of the human family, had provided himself with peas, and,
+taking advantage of the partial darkness in which the panorama was
+exhibited, shot those missiles with practised aim at Professor
+Wesley, and now and then hit him in the face. The lecturer kept in
+good humor; and when, after a smart volley of peas, Rev. Dr. A----
+arose, and suggested that these disturbances were disgraceful, and,
+although he did not wish to meddle with the household government of
+his brethren, he thought that the children who were guilty of such
+outrages ought to be taken home, soundly whipped, and put to
+bed--when Rev. Dr. A----, moved by just indignation, did this, the
+lecturer smiled, and blandly said: Oh, no; he wasn't annoyed in the
+least (at the same time receiving a pea on his left cheek). He
+would trust to the generosity of his young friends not to fire
+their peas too hard; and he hoped that the reverend gentleman would
+withdraw his suggestion.</p>
+<p>Cries of "All right, brother!" "We'll keep the boys quiet!" "Go
+on! go on!" went up from all parts of the room. Rev. Dr. A----,
+yielding to the pressure, sat down, and received, at that moment,
+one pea on the right eye of his gold spectacles, and another square
+on the end of his nose. The two peas were fired by his second son
+John, who had been delivering this invisible artillery all the
+evening from the other end of the identical pew in which the Rev.
+Dr. was seated. He groaned in the spirit, and muttered something to
+Mrs. Rev. Dr. A---- about the degeneracy of other people's
+children, which made that lady chuckle low, under cover of the
+night; for she knew that her second son John was the pea-shooter,
+and had made vain efforts to stop him, by pinching his leg, though
+the good matron could not help laughing at every fine shot achieved
+by her promising boy.</p>
+<p>Professor Wesley "went on," as requested, and so did the
+pea-shooting, until John's stock of ammunition gave out.</p>
+<p>The lecturer had ransacked the Society, Astor, and Mercantile
+libraries, and stuffed himself with facts touching the interior of
+Africa, so far as that mystery had been explored. Fortified with
+these facts, and a lively imagination, he found no difficulty in
+satisfying the curiosity of his auditors on every point; and
+answered questions of all sorts, which were fired at him even
+thicker than the peas, without the least hesitation.</p>
+<p>When the exhibition was over, every clergyman present signed a
+certificate declaring that they had been highly entertained and
+instructed by the Panorama of Africa, and Mr. Wesley's able
+lecture; that they considered the painting a masterpiece of moral
+Art, and cordially recommended it to the patronage of an
+enlightened public.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="G_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>BY STEAM.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Tiffles had selected, as his first field of active operations,
+the State of New Jersey. His large number of relatives (the
+Tiffleses were prolific on the female side) and friends, and
+occasional creditors, scattered through New England and New York,
+effectually barred him from all that territory. New Jersey, then
+Pennsylvania, then the West--those were the great topographical
+features of his campaign.</p>
+<p>For his initiatory performance, he had chosen a quiet little
+town less than thirty miles from the city, on a line of railway. If
+his panorama was to be a hopeless failure at the very outset,
+Tiffles wanted to be within striking distance of New York. He was
+sanguine of success; but, like a prudent general, he looked after
+his lines of retreat.</p>
+<p>To this small town in New Jersey, with which the fate of the
+great enterprise was to be indissolubly linked, Tiffles had sent a
+large stock of posters and handbills. He had previously
+corresponded (free of expense both ways) with that universal
+business man of every American village, the postmaster, and,
+through him, had engaged Washington Hall--the largest hall in the
+place, capable of holding six hundred people--at five dollars for
+one night, with the refusal of two nights more.</p>
+<p>The name of the hall and the night of exhibition were written in
+blank spaces on the posters and handbills with red chalk, in a fine
+commercial hand, by Tiffles himself; and, for a small
+consideration, the postmaster had agreed to stick up the posters on
+every corner; also on the post office and the three town pumps; and
+to distribute the handbills in every house. These labors the P.M.
+did not undertake to perform personally--though he had plenty of
+leisure for them, as well as for the local defence of the National
+Administration, which was his peculiar and official function--but
+he turned them over to a semi-idiot, who occasionally did jobs of
+that kind, and who was willing to trust for his pay to the coming
+of Professor Wesley.</p>
+<p>The last letter from the postmaster ran thus:</p>
+<blockquote>Yure's of the 6th reseved, and contense, including for
+my pussenel expenses, dooly noted, Washinton Hall has been moped
+out for you and is clene as a pin, six new tin cannel sticks have
+been put up in the antyrum by the propryetor, this is lyberul, all
+the hanbils has been distributid, and the posters stuck up, sum of
+em wrong side down, owin to the bilposter bein a little
+week-minded, which will be a kind of curosity, and an advantije to
+you I think. I have sent tickets to the village pastures and their
+famylis, as yu requested and they red the notises last Sunday and
+advised everybuddy to go. I have gut public opinion all rite for yu
+here, now cum on with yer panyrammer of Afriky.<br>
+<br>
+Yure's trooly,<br>
+B. PERSIMMON, p.m.</blockquote>
+<p>This was cheering; and Tiffles only hoped that he would be able
+to secure so faithful an ally in every postmaster, for he had
+decided to do this preliminary work through that variety of public
+functionary, until the success of the panorama would justify hiring
+a special courier to go in advance and smooth the way for him,</p>
+<p>All these preparations having been satisfactorily made; and the
+panorama, with the curtains, the lighting apparatus, and the other
+properties, having been forwarded in three enormous boxes to the
+scene of the impending conflict with public opinion, Tiffles made
+ready to follow. And, on the eventful morning of the----- of April,
+185-, he might have been seen at the Cortlandt-street ferry,
+accompanied by Patching, who had graciously consented to see how
+the "thing worked" on its first public trial.</p>
+<p>Patching pulled his enormous hat still farther over his eyes, so
+that he might not be recognized. This gave him an extremely
+questionable aspect; and the ticket taker at the ferry peered under
+the huge brim suspiciously as Patching came in. He also attracted
+the attention of a detective in citizen's clothes, and was a
+general object of interest to all the people congregated in the
+ferry house and waiting for the boat.</p>
+<p>"This is fame," muttered Patching, glancing at his scrutinizers
+from the shadow of the far-reaching hat. "This is what people
+starve and die for. It is a bore." He struck an attitude, as if
+unconsciously, folding his arms, and appearing to be in a profound
+revery. Then, after another cautious glance about, he turned to
+Tiffles, by his side, and said:</p>
+<p>"It is useless. I am recognized. But remember your solemn
+promise. I had no hand in the painting of it."</p>
+<p>"Not a little finger, my dear fellow," cheerfully replied
+Tiffles, who had given the artist similar assurances of secrecy
+five times that morning.</p>
+<p>At that moment a hand touched Tiffles familiarly on the
+shoulder. He turned suddenly, for he was always expecting rear
+attacks from creditors. He saw Marcus Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>"Best of friends," said Tiffles, with unfeigned joy, "I am glad
+to see you. Of course you are going with us, though I hardly dared
+hope as much when I sent you the invitation."</p>
+<p>"To tell the truth, Tiffles, I had no intention of going, till
+this morning, when it suddenly occurred to me that a little trip in
+the country, and the fun of seeing your panorama and hearing you
+lecture, would drive away the blues. I had a bad fit of them last
+night."</p>
+<p>Here Patching turned, and looked Marcus in the face, without
+seeming to recognize him. It was his habit (not a singular one
+among the human species) to pretend not to remember people, and to
+wait for the first word. Marcus indulged in the same habit to some
+extent, and, when he saw Patching looking at him without a nod or a
+word, he also was blank and speechless.</p>
+<p>"Don't you remember each other?" said Tiffles. "Mr. Patching.
+Mr. Marcus Wilkeson."</p>
+<p>The gentlemen shook hands, and said:</p>
+<p>"Oh, yes! How do you do? It is a fine morning. Very."</p>
+<p>"So much paler than when I last saw you, that I didn't know you,
+positively. Little ill, sir?" asked Patching. The artist was sure
+to observe and speak of any signs of illness on the faces of his
+friends and acquaintances. Some people called him malevolent for
+it.</p>
+<p>To be told that one looks pale, always makes one turn paler.
+Marcus, extra sensitive on the point of looks, became quite pallid,
+and said, with confusion:</p>
+<p>"I have not been well for several days, and my rest was badly
+broken last night."</p>
+<p>Tiffles had also remarked the unusual deadly whiteness of his
+friend's complexion, and the air of lassitude and unhappiness which
+pervaded his face, but he would not have alluded to them for the
+world. He never made impertinent observations of that sort.</p>
+<p>"Unwell?" said Tiffles. "I had not noticed it. In the morning,
+all New York looks as if it had just come out of a debauch.
+Wilkeson will pass, I guess." This calumny upon the city was
+Tiffles's favorite bit of satire, and it had cheered up many a poor
+fellow who thought himself looking uncommonly haggard.</p>
+<p>Marcus smiled languidly, and turned away his head with a sigh.
+As his eyes swept about, they encountered the gaze of the man in
+citizen's clothes, previously noticed. At first, Marcus thought he
+had seen this man somewhere before; and then he thought he was
+mistaken. The man evinced no recognition of Marcus, and, an instant
+after, his sharp glance wandered to some other person in the large
+group waiting for the boat.</p>
+<p>Here the boat came into the slip, and, after bumping in an
+uncertain way against the piles on either side, neared almost
+within leaping distance of the wharf. A solid crowd of passengers
+stood at the edge of the boat, with their eyes fixed on the landing
+place, as if it were the soil of a new world upon which they were
+to leap for the first time, like a party of Columbuses When the
+distance had been diminished to about four feet, the front row of
+passengers jumped ashore, and rushed wildly up the street, as if
+impelled by a rocket-like power from behind. These people could not
+have been more eager to get ashore, if they had come from the other
+side of the globe on business involving a million apiece, to be
+transacted on that day only.</p>
+<p>In fact, they were only lawyers, tradesmen, mechanics, and
+clerks, living in Jersey City, and going over to New York on their
+daily, humdrum business. It was not the business that attracted
+them, but the demon of American restlessness that pushed them on.
+They went back at night in just the same hurry, and made equally
+hazardous jumps on the Jersey side. They were mere shuttlecocks
+between the battledoors of Jersey City and New York.</p>
+<p>Tiffles and Patching lifted up the thin carpet bags which
+reposed at their feet, and which contained an exceedingly small
+amount of personal linen and other attire, and went on board the
+boat, followed by Marcus, who was unencumbered with baggage. They
+entered the ladies' cabin. The thick crowd of people pressed into
+the cabin in their front and rear, and all about them, and
+scrambled for seats. There was a general preference for the part
+forward of the wheelhouse, because it was a few feet nearer New
+Jersey than the aft part. The rush to obtain these preferred places
+was like that of the opera-going world for the front row of boxes
+at a <i>matin&eacute;e</i>. Ladies who obtained eligible seats,
+settled themselves in them, spread out their dresses, put their
+gloved hands in position, and smiled with a sweet satisfaction at
+ladies who had got no seats. Those ladies, in turn, looked
+reproachfully at the gentlemen who were comfortably seated. And
+those gentlemen, with the exception of a few who rose and
+gracefully offered their seats to the youngest and prettiest of the
+ladies, in turn looked out of the windows, or at the floor, or at a
+paper, intently.</p>
+<p>A stranger to the ferry boats and customs of the country would
+have supposed that the passengers were bound for Europe instead of
+the opposite shore of North River.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson, Times, and Patching did not participate in this
+contest for seats, but walked through the fetid and stifling cabins
+to the forward deck, where fresh, bracing air, glorious sunlight,
+and a cheery view of the river were to be had. But these charms of
+nature were apparently thrown away on the trio. They all leaned
+over the railing, and, looked steadily into the water. Times was
+thinking up his lecture, and other matters of the panorama.
+Patching was misanthropically reviewing his career, and exulting in
+future triumphs over his professional enemies. Marcus was engrossed
+with some sad theme which, once or twice, brought tears into his
+eyes. A burst of noble music, a fine sentiment in a poem, a poor
+woman crying, keen personal disappointment, or any acute mental
+trouble, had this strange effect on the optics of Marcus
+Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>The bell rang; voices shouted, "All aboard!" the gangplank was
+drawn in; several belated people jumped on, at the risk of their
+lives, after the boat had left the wharf, one man vaulting over ten
+feet; and the voyage for Jersey was commenced.</p>
+<p>Three minutes later, the inmates of the cabins began to go
+forward and pick favorable positions for jumping off on the other
+side. The scramble to evacuate the seats then was as sharp as the
+scramble to possess them, three minutes before. A few more rounds
+of the wheels, and the boat thumped in the usual way against one
+row of piles at the entrance of the Jersey slip, and then caromed
+like a billiard ball on the other, each time nearly knocking the
+passengers off their feet, and shaking a small chorus of screams
+out of the ladies.</p>
+<p>When the boat was within a yard of the wharf, the jumping
+commenced; and all the able-bodied men, most of the boys, and some
+of the ladies, were off before the boat butted with tremendous
+force against the wharf, shaking both wharf and boat to their
+foundations, and giving to the people on both a parting jar, which
+they carried in their bones for the rest of the day.</p>
+<p>Once safely on the wharf, the scramble was continued in various
+directions and for various objects. Marcus, Tiffles, and Patching
+indulged in the eccentricity of not scrambling; and, when they
+reached the Erie Railroad cars, they found every seat taken, some
+by two persons, but many by one lady and a bandbox or carpet bag,
+which was intended to signify to the inquiring eye that the lawful
+human occupant of that half of the seat was absent, but might be
+expected to come in and claim it at any moment.</p>
+<p>The three companions understood this conventional imposture, and
+politely claimed the spare half seats from the nearest ladies. The
+fair occupants looked forbidding, and slowly removed their
+bandboxes, baskets, and other parcels, to the floor beneath, or the
+rack overhead; and the disturbers of their peace and comfort
+ruthlessly took the vacated seats, with a bow, signifying "Thank
+you."</p>
+<p>The seats thus procured were some distance apart; and so the
+three companions were precluded from conversing with each other.
+This suited the taciturn mood of each that morning. As for the
+ladies who filled the other half of the three seats, they might as
+well have been lay figures from a Broadway drygoods store;
+conversation with them being prohibited by the etiquette of railway
+travelling. A man may journey two hundred and fifty miles in a car,
+with his elbow unavoidably jogging a lady's all the way, and still
+be as far from her acquaintance (unless she is graciously inclined
+to say something first) as if the pair were leagues apart. This is
+proper, but peculiar.</p>
+<p>The strange sadness that possessed Marcus that morning was
+intensified as the ears rolled on. There is something in the
+monotonous vibration of the train, and the recurring click of the
+wheels against the end of the rails, that provokes melancholy.
+Marcus looked out of the window at the flying landscape, and the
+distant patches of wood which seemed to be slowly revolving about
+each other, and was profoundly wretched. He was totally unconscious
+of the sharp, pale, nervous face by his side.</p>
+<p>The owner of the face was about thirty-five years old, though
+the lines on her brow and cheeks added an apparent five years to
+her age. If she had been put upon her trial for murder, the police
+reporters would have discovered traces of great beauty in her
+countenance. An ordinary spectator, having no occasion to spice a
+paragraph, would have made the equivocal remark that she had once
+been handsomer.</p>
+<p>This lady was dressed plainly, comfortably, and in good taste.
+Her hands, ungloved, were shapely, but red and hard with manual
+labor. On the second finger of the left hand was a little gold
+ring, much thinned by wearing. The eyes of this lady were regarding
+the unconscious Marcus obliquely, with a singular expression of
+mingled recollection and doubt. Sometimes her glance would drop to
+the ring, as if that were a link in the chain of her perplexed
+reflections. A sudden jolt of the car, as the train ran over a pole
+which had fallen on the track, roused Marcus to the existence of
+this face and those eyes.</p>
+<p>As he saw the eyes sternly bent on him, he thought that his
+staring out of the window, past the lady's profile, might have
+offended her. So, with a cough which was meant to serve as an
+apology for the unintentional rudeness, he turned his face away,
+and continued his gloomy revery among the odd patterns of the
+oilcloth on the floor of the aisle.</p>
+<p>Still the thin, nervous lady watched him obliquely.</p>
+<p>A ride of three quarters of an hour brought them to their
+destination, as they learned from a preliminary howl of the
+conductor through the rear door of the car. The engine bell rang,
+the whistle screamed, the clack of the wheels gradually became
+slower.</p>
+<p>"Only one minute. Hurry!" howled the conductor again.</p>
+<p>Marcus, Tiffles, and Patching were out of their seats and at the
+door with American despatch. Before the car had quite stopped, they
+had jumped off. Marcus did not notice that, behind him, was a woman
+struggling between the two rows of seats with a bandbox, a
+workbasket, an umbrella, and her hoops, all of which caught in turn
+on one side or the other. Nor did the conductor observe that this
+burdened and distressed lady was trying to make her way out; for,
+after looking from the rear of the train, and seeing that three
+persons had landed, and that there was nobody to get on, he
+concluded that it would be a waste of time to stop a minute, and so
+rang the bell to go ahead. The engine driver, equally impatient,
+jerked the starting lever, and the engine bounded forward like a
+horse, giving a shock to the train, and nearly upsetting the woman,
+who was still wrestling with her personal effects between the rows
+of seats. With a sudden effort, she freed herself, opened the door,
+and stood upon the platform.</p>
+<p>The engine had wheezed three times, and she hesitated to jump.
+She screamed shrilly. The sound entered the ears of Marcus
+Wilkeson, who was whisking dust and ashes off his clothes with a
+handkerchief. He ran forward, and saw the predicament of his pale
+and nervous fellow traveller. She screamed again, as the engine
+wheezed for the eighth time.</p>
+<p>Marcus extended his hand. "Jump!" said he; "I'll catch you."</p>
+<p>She did jump, much to the surprise of Marcus and the two lookers
+on--thereby indicating decision of character.</p>
+<p>Marcus caught her in his arms--bandbox, basket, and all--and the
+train hurried on.</p>
+<p>"Thank you, sir," said the lady, with some confusion. Then she
+walked rapidly down the road toward the village, like one who lived
+there.</p>
+<p>"A customer for the panorama, perhaps," said Tiffles. "I'm glad
+you landed her safely." Tiffles had got through his thinking, and
+was exhilarate again. He laughed so pleasantly, that even Marcus
+relaxed his grim visage, and smiled.</p>
+<p>"Not a bad ankle, that," observed Patching, looking at the
+rapidly retreating form of the rescued woman. Patching,
+artist-like, was always discovering beauties where nobody else
+looked for them.</p>
+<p>Marcus had no eye for the charms of nature that morning, and he
+responded not to the remark which the artist had addressed to him.
+Whereupon Patching determined not to speak to Marcus again that
+day.</p>
+<p>They followed the mysterious female down the road which led to
+the village. On the fences, every few rods, were plastered posters
+announcing the "Panorama of Africa" for that evening, at
+"Washington Hall"--"Tickets, twenty-five cents"--"Children under
+twelve years of age, half price," &amp;c., &amp;c. As B. Persimmon,
+P.M., had said, in one of his letters, some of the posters were
+stuck upside down. This circumstance did not seem to prevent the
+population from reading them; for the party observed at least two
+boys (half prices) in the act of spelling them out between their
+legs.</p>
+<p>Tiffles was so absorbed in the contemplation of the posters,
+Patching in a critical survey of the scenery on both sides of the
+road, and Marcus Wilkeson in an introspection of his troubled
+heart, that none of them observed how often the thin, nervous
+female, walking rapidly ahead, looked over her shoulder at one of
+their number.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="G_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>PIGWORTH, J.P.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The village was composed of the usual ingredients, in the usual
+proportions. Law, drygoods, liquor, blacksmithing, carpentry,
+education, painting and glazing, medicine, dentistry, tinware, and
+other comforts of civilization, were all to be had on reasonable
+terms. There were four churches with rival steeples, and two
+taverns with rival signs. The village contained everything that any
+reasonable man could ask for, except a barber's shop. It takes a
+good-sized town to support a barber's shop.</p>
+<p>As they marched into the village, they were conscious of
+attracting general attention. Men looked out of the doors, women
+out of the windows, and boys had begun to fall in procession
+behind.</p>
+<p>"Them are the performers," said one boy to another "Wonder what
+that feller with the big hat does?" observed a second. "Turns the
+crank, guess," was the response.</p>
+<p>Patching pulled his hat farther over his eyes, and smiled
+gloomily at Tiffles, "They little think who I am," he murmured.</p>
+<p>"What a solemncholy mug that tall chap's got," said another
+youthful citizen. This made Marcus try to laugh genially at the
+boys. But in vain.</p>
+<p>"Say, Bill, isn't that little feller's shirt out o' jail?"</p>
+<p>Tiffles made a personal application of this remark. It was his
+constant misfortune to suffer rents in portions of his garments
+where their existence was least likely to be discovered by himself.
+As he could not publicly verify the suggestion of the impertinent
+small boy, he buttoned his coat tightly about him.</p>
+<p>How their identity with the panorama of Africa had been
+established, was a mystery. Small boys divine secrets by instinct,
+as birds find food and water.</p>
+<p>The two taverns were the National House and the United States
+Hotel. Although the signs were large and clean, the taverns were
+small and dirty. There was no choice between them, except in the
+fact that the United States Hotel was directly opposite Washington
+Hall. Therefore the adherents of the panorama cast their fortunes
+with that place of entertainment for man and beast--particularly
+beast.</p>
+<p>Mr. Thomas Pigworth, the landlord, was seated on the stoop of
+his hostelry, discoursing of national politics to a small group of
+his fellow citizens, who were performing acrobatic feats with
+chairs in a circle about him. Pigworth was a justice of the peace,
+and was always dressed in his best clothes, so as to perform his
+judicial functions at a moments notice, with dignity and ease. He
+was tall, thin, baldheaded. T.J. Childon, landlord of the
+"National," said hard things, as in duty bound, of his rival. Among
+others, that he had kept himself lean by running so hard for office
+for the last ten years. To which slander Pigworth retorted, that
+Childon was fat (which was true--a fine, plump figure was
+Childon's) only because he ate everything in his house, and left
+nothing for his customers.</p>
+<p>The three newcomers mounted the rotten wooden steps to the
+stoop. Mr. Pigworth left his group of auditors, came forward, and
+received them with the affability of a retired statesman.</p>
+<p>"The landlord?" asked Tiffles.</p>
+<p>"I keep the hotel," said Pigworth, with a smile which intimated
+that he kept it for amusement rather than profit.</p>
+<p>"Room and board for three of us?" asked Tiffles.</p>
+<p>"Certainly," said Pigworth, with the air of a man who was doing
+them a favor. "Ef you want only one apartment, I can give you the
+one occupied last week by the Hon. Mr. Podhammer. You have heard of
+him?"</p>
+<p>"Of course," responded Tiffles, to cut short the
+conversation.</p>
+<p>"He spoke in Washington Hall, there, on the Cons'tution. He is
+smart on some things, but THE CONS'TUTION he doesn't
+understand--not a word of it. I told him so."</p>
+<p>Tiffles was about to ask why, if the Hon. Mr. Podhammer didn't
+understand a word of the Constitution, he had the audacity to
+lecture on it; when he remembered that it was no uncommon thing for
+lecturers to talk of what they don't understand--himself of Africa,
+for instance.</p>
+<p>"Be good enough to show us the room," said he.</p>
+<p>"I say, Judge" (Pigworth, being a justice of the peace, was
+universally styled thus), cried a voice from the group, "do you, or
+do you not, indorse my sentiments?"</p>
+<p>Pigworth turned majestically, and spoke like an oracle:</p>
+<p>"I do not indorse your sentiments. I wish it distinctly
+understood, that I do not indorse them. I indorse nothing but the
+Cons'tution. That instrument I indorse to any extent. Are you
+satisfied now?"</p>
+<p>This speech was hailed by cries of "Good! good!" "That's so!"
+"Sound doctrine, that!" "The Judge knows what's what!" Only one
+person, the questioner, a young man with a preternatural head, was
+unappeased.</p>
+<p>"A single word more," said this young man. "Do you, or do you
+not, subscribe to my views on the Homestead Law?"</p>
+<p>Pigworth looked at the three comers as if to say, "Mark how I
+crush him now." Then, pointing his long right arm at the rash
+youth, he replied, slowly, but with fearful distinctness: "I do not
+subscribe to your views. Sooner would I lose this right arm than
+subscribe to them. There is only one view that I subscribe to. That
+view to which I subscribe (the Judge spoke with increased dignity
+here, and rose on his toes)--that view is found in the Cons'tution.
+You would do well to study the Cons'tution, my young friend."</p>
+<p>This withering rebuke was greeted with shouts and clapping of
+hands from all but the young man, who muttered something about
+humbug, and looked glum.</p>
+<p>The landlord had another excoriating remark, which he might have
+flung at the young man and finished him up, but he magnanimously
+forbore.</p>
+<p>"Now, my friends," said the landlord, patronizingly. He ushered
+them into a dirty entry, and piloted the way up stairs.</p>
+<p>"From New York, I suppose?" said the landlord. "Any political
+news?"</p>
+<p>"Really, sir, we don't meddle with politics," replied Tiffles,
+sharply.</p>
+<p>The landlord looked at him with an expression of pity "Oh! to be
+sure not. You belong to the pannyrama. I recolleck that the last
+circus folks that come here never talked about politics. Are you
+Professor Wesley?"</p>
+<p>"I am," said Tiffles.</p>
+<p>"I merely wanted to say," continued the landlord, "that six of
+my lodgers are goin' to the pannyrama on my recommendation. I have
+a wife, sister-in-law and five children."</p>
+<p>Tiffles took the hint. "I will hand you a complimentary ticket
+for yourself and family," said he.</p>
+<p>"Oh, no! by no means!" replied the landlord. "I wouldn't think
+of taking it."</p>
+<p>Mr. Pigworth then ushered his guests into the large,
+uncomfortable apartment known as the "best room" in all country
+hotels. The ceiling was low; there were three windows with small
+panes, the sashes of which rattled in the wind; a rag carpet
+covered the floor; an old bureau, topped off with a dirty white
+cloth, a rickety table similarly draped, four cane-bottomed chairs,
+and a huge wooden spitbox filled with sawdust, stood at intervals
+around. Two single beds occupied opposite corners.</p>
+<p>With reference to the beds, Mr. Pigworth remarked:</p>
+<p>"Podhammer and Gineral Chetley slept in that air one. Colonel
+Hockensacker and Judge Waterfield in t'other. There was four other
+mattresses put down here that night, each of 'em with two of our
+most distinguished citizens on it. That convention was worth to me
+a good hundred dollars."</p>
+<p>With every respect for the precedent established by Podhammer
+and associates, Marcus Wilkeson preferred to sleep alone, as he had
+done for twenty years. He privately expressed to the landlord a
+desire for one of the mattresses which had done duty during the
+convention.</p>
+<p>The landlord smiled, evidently regarding the request as
+eccentric and unreasonable, but nodded "All right." As for Tiffles
+and Patching, having shared the same couch several nights during
+the incubation of the panorama, the problem of how to distribute
+three men among two beds gave them no concern. Pigworth then
+retired.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson's first act was to open the windows, and mix
+some fresh air with the damp and mouldy atmosphere of the
+apartment. Patching's first act was to light his pipe, and throw
+himself on the nearest bed for a smoke. Tiffles's first act was to
+inspect the rent which the impertinent small boy had discovered,
+and make temporary repairs with a pin. Having done these things,
+and arranged their toilets hastily in a mirror with a crack running
+through it like a streak of lightning, the three adventurers
+sallied forth, and crossed the street to Washington Hall.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="G_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>STOOP.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Washington Hall was the only place of public congregation,
+excepting the churches, in the village. It was used on Sunday by a
+small but clamorous religious sect; on Monday by a lodge of Free
+Masons; on Tuesday by a lodge of Odd Fellows; on Wednesday by the
+Sons of Temperance; and for the balance of the week was open to any
+description of exhibition that came along. It was originally built
+for a loft, and its reconstruction into a public hall was an
+afterthought. It was situated over a drug store, and was owned by
+the druggist, Mr. Boolpin, who was universally regarded as the
+meanest man in the village.</p>
+<p>As the three drew near the door, Mr. Boolpin, strongly smelling
+of aloes, and carrying a pestle in his hand, came out to greet
+them. He, in common with all the inhabitants, knew that the
+"pannyrarmer folks" were in town. The small boys had borne the glad
+intelligence all abroad. A number of citizens, who had been lying
+in wait, issued forth with Mr. Boolpin, and looked hard at the
+three.</p>
+<p>"The proprietor of the hall," said Mr. Boolpin, introducing
+himself.</p>
+<p>"My name is Wesley," responded Tiffles. He then introduced
+Patching as Signor Ceccarini, and Wilkeson as Mr. Wilkes. Patching
+chuckled inwardly at the thought of the incognito, and imagined the
+sensation that would be produced by the accidental revelation of
+his real name. Marcus felt a momentary humiliation at having
+consented to this innocent imposture.</p>
+<p>Mr. Boolpin, having shaken hands solemnly with the three, asked
+them to walk up stairs and look at the hall. They accordingly
+followed him up a series of creaking steps.</p>
+<p>"Everything in apple-pie order," said Mr. Boolpin. "The three
+boxes containing the panorama right side up with care, you see. I
+had them carted from the depot. Cost me a dollar. People thought
+they were coffins. Ha! ha! Six new tin candlesticks, you observe;
+also the ceiling whitewashed; also ten extra seats introduced,
+making the entire capacity of the hall three hundred and
+fifty--giving twelve inches of sitting room to each person. No
+extra charge for these fixings, though I made them expressly on
+your account. There are some things about this hall to which I
+would call your attention. Boo! Boo! Hallo! Hallo! No echo, you
+perceive. Likewise notice the fine view from the window." Mr.
+Boolpin pointed to a swamp which could be distinctly seen over a
+housetop toward the east. "The ventilation is a great feature,
+too." Mr. Boolpin directed his pestle toward a trap door in a
+corner of the ceiling, through which a quantity of rain had come a
+night or two previous, leaving a large wet patch on the floor.
+"It's almost too cheap for fifteen dollars a night."</p>
+<p>"For what?" asked Tiffles.</p>
+<p>"For fifteen dollars," replied Mr. Boolpin, twirling his pestle
+playfully. "Of course, not reckoning in the one dollar that you owe
+me for cartage. It's too cheap. I ought to have made it twenty
+dollars."</p>
+<p>"Why, Mr. Persimmon, the postmaster here, engaged the hall for
+five dollars. Here is his letter mentioning the price." Tiffles
+produced the letter, and pointed out the numeral in question.</p>
+<p>"It's a 5, without any doubt," rejoined Mr. Boolpin; "but
+Persimmon had no authority to name that price. I distinctly told
+him fifteen dollars. But here he is. Perhaps he can explain
+it."</p>
+<p>The three turned on their heels, and beheld, standing at the
+door, a short, dirty man in a faded suit of black, and a
+cold-shining satin vest. He wore an old hat set well back on a bald
+head, and his cravat was tied on one side in hangman's fashion. One
+leg of his trowsers was tucked into the top of his boot; the other
+hung down in its proper position. The man's face and hands wanted
+washing. This was Mr. Persimmon, postmaster. The secrets of his
+popularity were: First, his addiction to dirt; second, his
+eccentricities of dress, heretofore enumerated; third, a reputation
+for political craft and long-headedness, not wholly unfounded, as
+his ingenuity in procuring the passage of resolutions supporting
+the policy of the Administration, in all the conventions of his
+party since he became postmaster, fully proved. This political sage
+walked about town with Post-Office documents and confidential
+communications from Washington sticking out of all his pockets, and
+under the edge of his hat. He had a slight stoop in the shoulders,
+which the local wits said had increased since he undertook to carry
+the Administration.</p>
+<p>"Professor Wesley?" remarked Persimmon, extending a grimy hand.
+"Happy to see you."</p>
+<p>"Your most obedient," said Tiffles, a little stiffly, for the
+fifteen dollars annoyed him. It was a small sum to borrow, but a
+large one to pay.</p>
+<p>"Have you such a thing as a morning newspaper about you?" asked
+the postmaster. "Our bundle missed the train. As you may naturally
+imagine, sir, I am anxious to see how the grand mass meeting went
+off last night in your city. Perhaps you wos there?"</p>
+<p>Tiffles had never attended such a thing in his life; although he
+was aware that two or three grand mass meetings were held every
+week about all the year round, and a dozen nightly in times of
+political excitement. "No," said he; "but will you be good enough
+to tell me how much you hired this room for?"</p>
+<p>Persimmon thought how culpably ignorant some people were of the
+great political movements of the day, but did not say so.
+Descending from politics to the subject in hand, he replied:</p>
+<p>"Oh! fifteen dollars, of course. You will find it stated in my
+last letter to you." At this moment (no one of the three observing
+the act), the long-headed postmaster tipped a slight wink to Mr.
+Boolpin, who returned that signal of mutual understanding.</p>
+<p>Tiffles handed the letter to the postmaster, pointing out the
+figure 5.</p>
+<p>"Can I believe my eyes?" said the postmaster. "True enough, it
+is a 5. Confound my absent-mindedness in not puttin' down a 1." It
+may here be said, that similar instances of mental aberration were
+discovered in Mr. Persimmon's accounts toward the close of his
+official term.</p>
+<p>Tiffles was staggered, as he reflected that it would take sixty
+full tickets to pay the single item of rent. He had less than half
+a dollar in his own pocket. Patching was, as usual, reduced to his
+last five-dollar bill. Marcus had incidentally observed, a few
+minutes before, that he had left his wallet at home, and had only a
+handful of small silver about him. Suppose the panorama should fail
+on the first night, and be detained for debt! Tiffles had not
+thought of that.</p>
+<p>Tiffles remonstrated, entreated, suggested compromises, but all
+to no purpose. Boolpin was iron. The best arrangement that Tiffles
+could make, was to postpone the final settlement of the terms until
+after the performance. To that, Boolpin had not the least
+objection.</p>
+<p>"One thing more," said Boolpin. "If there is a row, and any
+seats or windows are broken, you are to pay the damages."</p>
+<p>Tiffles laughed faintly. "Oh! of course," said he. "But you
+never have rows here, do you?" He put the question with disguised
+interest.</p>
+<p>"Sometimes," carelessly replied Mr. Boolpin. "There was a
+legerdemain man got his machinery knocked to pieces, and his head
+broken. The mob was quite reasonable about the furniture, and
+smashed only ten seats and sixteen panes of glass. I charged the
+Professor twenty dollars for damages, but took off two dollars on
+account of his illness. Poor fellow! he was laid up more than a
+month. Then there was a band of nigger minstrels, called the
+'Metropoliganians.' They were regular humbugs; and so the mob took
+them, and tarred and feathered them in the back lot. Damage to
+furniture on that occasion was only sixteen dollars; and I got
+every cent of it, by holding on to their trunks. There have been a
+good many such little affairs in this village. I mention these two
+cases only as examples."</p>
+<p>"And yet no people in the world is more peaceable, nor more
+easily satisfied, than the people of this town," said the
+postmaster. "They only axes not to be imposed on. That's all."</p>
+<p>"A kinder-hearted people don't live on the face of this earth,"
+added Boolpin, stating the case in another way; "but you mustn't
+give them less than twenty-five cents' worth for a quarter."</p>
+<p>Tiffles replied to the effect that he would give them a dollar's
+worth apiece; but, in his heart, he foresaw, with that remarkable
+prescience which is occasionally vouchsafed to mortals, that the
+panorama of Africa was doomed to be a bad failure; and he bitterly
+regretted that he had not tried some one of a dozen other immense
+speculations which he had thought of. But he determined to give one
+night's exhibition, whatever might be the consequences. "I may as
+well die for an old sheep as a lamb," thought Tiffles.</p>
+<p>During this conversation, Patching was secretly studying the
+effect of the swamp, visible from the eastern windows; and Marcus
+was looking at the cracked wall in a fit of abstraction.</p>
+<p>Tiffles had observed several times, that morning, a youth, or
+man, of singular aspect, following him. Occasionally, on turning
+around suddenly, he would see this person at his elbow. Looking
+behind, at the close of the colloquy with the landlord, he again
+saw the strange youth, or man. The being was nearly six feet high,
+and powerfully built, like a strong man of twenty-five. His face
+was childish even to the degree of silliness. The mouth opened like
+a flytrap; the eyes were small and intensely guileless. Only a few
+wrinkles, and a few hairs, which grew wide apart on his cheeks and
+chin, indicated his manhood. But the oddest feature was the falling
+away of his forehead, at an angle which a dirty greased cap, pulled
+over his brow, could not conceal.</p>
+<p>"Well, sir, what do you want?" said Tiffles.</p>
+<p>"If you please, sir," said the singular being, in a cracked
+voice, "yure the pannyrarmer, a'n't ye?"</p>
+<p>"Not exactly, my lad, but I own it. And who are you?"</p>
+<p>"My name's Stoop, if you please, sir."</p>
+<p>Mr. Boolpin broke out with a laugh, which made the building
+reverberate. "It's the village idiot," said he. "He goes by the
+name of Stoop, which is short for Stupid. Ha! ha! Come, now, clear
+out, Stupid, and don't be bothering the gentleman."</p>
+<p>The boy-man began to whimper, when Tiffles, recollecting an
+allusion to a semi-idiot in one of the postmaster's letters,
+said:</p>
+<p>"Stay, my lad; I believe I owe you something."</p>
+<p>"For pastin' up two hundred posters, fifty cents; and
+distributin' five hundred bills, twenty-five cents. Totale,
+seventy-five cents." The idiot did not hold out his hand for the
+pay, and Tiffles conceived an instant esteem for him. An idea came
+to Tiffles. This idiot, as he was called, had shown intelligence in
+reckoning. He might have a deal of good sense under that dull
+exterior. Tiffles had observed, in his travels, that <i>the</i>
+idiot which Providence assigns to every town and village, is not
+always the biggest fool in it. This idiot might have sufficient
+intellect to turn the crank of the panorama, and render muscular
+aid in other respects. At any rate, he was able-bodied enough.</p>
+<p>"My lad," said Tiffles.</p>
+<p>"Stoop, if you please, sir."</p>
+<p>"Very good. Stoop, I think I can find some work for you behind
+the scenes to-night. Can you turn a crank?"</p>
+<p>"I've done it to grindstones, sir."</p>
+<p>"It's the same principle," said Tiffles, laughing. "I'll engage
+you."</p>
+<p>The idiot took off his greasy cap, and swung it in the air with
+joy. A smile irradiated his great, coarse face, and his small eyes
+twinkled. "Gosh golly!" he cried; "I'm goin' to be one of the
+performers. I'm so glad!"</p>
+<p>He said this, in a spirit of juvenile exultation, to the dozen
+boys who stood gaping in at the doorway. This innocent bit of
+boasting provoked their derisive laughter, and a quantity of
+playful epithets and nicknames, which the idiot endured with
+marvellous patience, until one dirty little boy put the thumb of
+his left hand to his nose, twirled the fingers, and said, "Boo!
+boo! boo!" This act had the same effect on poor Stoop as the
+shaking of a red handkerchief at a bull. It enraged him. He sprang
+at the youth, and, but for the sudden closing of the door by the
+offender, who had judiciously kept a hand on the knob, would have
+chastised him on the spot.</p>
+<p>The door not only arrested his progress, but suddenly checked
+his wrath. "I'm very sorry, indeed, Professor," said he; "but
+Gorrifus! it makes me so mad!"</p>
+<p>Messrs. Boolpin and Persimmon laughed heartily. "He's a perfect
+idiot, you see," remarked the former. "Coming the nose system at
+him always makes him mad."</p>
+<p>Tiffles did not understand how that was any proof of idiocy;
+but, to prevent the recurrence of any difficulty between his new
+assistant and the populace of small boys, he thought it best to
+take possession of the hall, and lock the door. He therefore
+signified to Mr. Boolpin that they would at once proceed to put up
+the panorama. Tiffles threw off his coat, thereby intimating that
+he would go to work at once.</p>
+<p>Messrs. Boolpin and Persimmon inquired, as a matter of form,
+whether their further assistance was needed, and were answered in
+the negative. Whereupon they retired--Mr. Boolpin uttering a
+farewell caution against driving more nails in the wall than were
+necessary, and not to cut the floor under any circumstances--and
+the panorama and its adherents were left alone.</p>
+<p>Mr. Boolpin had driven the uproarious boys before him with his
+pestle, administering smart taps to the reluctant ones. Tiffles
+suffered no further annoyance from them that day, save an
+occasional "Boo! boo!" shouted through the keyhole, and followed by
+an immediate scampering of the perpetrators down stairs. This
+well-known sound always roused the idiot to fury; and the peaceable
+persuasions, and even the gentle violence of Tiffles, were needed
+to keep him from relinquishing his work and springing to the
+door.</p>
+<p>He was a most intelligent and useful idiot. He could measure
+distances more accurately than either of the three, and could ply
+the saw, hammer, plane, or hatchet (Tiffles brought all these tools
+with him) like a carpenter. His strength and skill were so great,
+that Tiffles found himself gratefully relieved from the necessity
+of lifting, or directing. Marcus Wilkeson, who had also thrown off
+his coat with a manful determination to do a hard day's work, in
+the hope of tiring out and driving away the sadness that possessed
+him, put on the garment again, and sat on a front bench, vacantly
+staring like an idiot at the idiot, and all the while thinking,
+gloomily, of New York. Patching stalked about the hall, and
+criticized the work as it progressed, from numerous angles of
+observation; but even he confessed that he could make no
+improvement on Stoop's highly artistic disposition of things.</p>
+<p>The idiot worked on steadily and swiftly, and only two things
+interrupted him. The first was the "Boo!" yelled through the
+keyhole, as heretofore described. The second was the unrolling of
+portions of the panorama as they were taken out of the boxes,
+fastened together, and attached to the rollers.</p>
+<p>As the canvas was unwound, Stoop would drop his saw, or hammer,
+or other tool, and gaze, with his large mouth and small eyes wide
+open, at the pictorial marvels successively disclosed. "Blame it!"
+said he; "a'n't that splendid?" or, "By jingo! look at that!" or,
+"Thunder! don't that beat all?" The tigers' tails and the
+elephants' trunks, the alligators' snouts and the boa constrictor's
+convolutions, he recognized at once. He had "read all about 'em in
+Olney's Jogriffy."</p>
+<p>"He is an idiot of taste," thought Patching. "I wonder what they
+call him an idiot for?" thought Tiffles. "It's a pity all the
+people aren't idiots," said Marcus Wilkeson to Tiffles. "Your
+panorama would be patronized and appreciated then." It was Marcus's
+first approach to a joke that day.</p>
+<p>By four o'clock in the afternoon the Panorama of Africa was all
+up, the rollers and the curtain in good working order, and
+everything ready for the eventful night. Stoop had taken a lesson
+at the wheel, and turned it beautifully. Tiffles had arranged a
+system of signals with him. One cough was "Stop;" two coughs were
+"Go on;" one stamp was "Slower;" two, stamps were "Faster." Tiffles
+and Stoop rehearsed the system several times, the one being before
+the curtain, in the position of the lecturer, and the other behind
+it, at the crank. Nothing could be more satisfactory.</p>
+<p>"Only one thing puzzles me," said Tiffles to his friends. "Why
+do they call this smart fellow an idiot?"</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="G_CHAPTER_V."></a>CHAPTER V.</h2>
+<h3>AN AUDIENCE ANALYZED.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The eventful night came on. Tiffles and friends fortified
+themselves with a poor supper, including numerous cups of weak
+black tea, at the hotel, and repaired, full of anxiety and
+misgivings, to the hall. The idiotic but intelligent Stoop had
+remained in charge of the panorama, and feasted himself,
+intellectually, upon the splendors of that work of Art, as
+disclosed by a single candle in front.</p>
+<p>All the candles in the hall and the entry were then lighted up,
+and produced quite a gorgeous illumination of the four windows
+fronting on the main street. This having been done, Marcus (who,
+having a more extensive acquaintance with the faces of bank bills
+than either of his friends, had kindly consented to act as money
+taker and cashier) took his seat in a little box with a pigeon hole
+in it, and his entire stock of loose change, amounting to
+seventy-five cents in silver, spread before him. Tiffles stood
+within the door of the hall, to see that nobody came in (especially
+small boys) who had not paid. Stoop remained behind the scenes, and
+was positively instructed to stay there. Patching wandered up and
+down the hall, as if he were an early comer, and had paid his
+quarter, and had no personal knowledge of or interest in the
+panorama.</p>
+<p>Performance was to commence at 8 o'clock. Doors were open at
+61/2. Some time previous to that hour, the stairs leading from the
+street door to the hall were lined with the lads of the village,
+who amused themselves with making jocular remarks about "the man in
+the cage there" (meaning Marcus), and "t'other man at the door,
+whose shirt was out of jail" (meaning Tiffles). Marcus smiled
+grimly at his assailants through the small pigeon hole; and
+Tiffles, who felt reckless in the sure view of a failure, laughed
+heartily at them, returned jokes as bad as they sent, but, in the
+height of his humor, begged them distinctly to understand that they
+could not get In without paying. At which the juvenile chorus
+sarcastically replied, "P'r'aps not;" "Mebbe you're right," "You'll
+have to stop up the keyhole, Mister;" "Mind I don't get down the
+chimbley," &amp;c., &amp;c.</p>
+<p>At precisely forty-seven minutes past six, the first man made
+his appearance. He was a thick-set, pompous individual, with a
+gold-headed cane and gold spectacles, and climbed up the stairs
+with dignity and difficulty. He was followed by a pale little
+woman, four small children, and a stout, red-haired nurse, bearing
+in her arms a baby, which was laboring under an attack of the
+intermittent squalls. Marcus reconnoitred the party through his
+pigeon hole, and nervously jingled the seventy-five cents in his
+hand. Tiffles stepped forward to the head of the stairs, in order
+that he might not be wanting in personal respect to his first
+patron.</p>
+<p>As this thick-set man ascended the stairs, the boys hushed their
+voices; but Tiffles distinctly heard several of them say, "It's the
+Square." Though apparently awestruck in his presence, the boys did
+not forget to play a few practical jokes on "the Square's"
+children, such as slapping them, and pinching their legs as they
+clambered wearily up. A peal of cries from his tortured offspring,
+particularly the baby, who received a pin in a sensitive part of
+its little person, so enraged "the Square," that he would have
+beaten all the boys with his gold-headed cane, had they not jumped
+away, laughing, and got safely out of the building, only to be back
+again the next minute.</p>
+<p>"You should not allow these boys to hang around the stairs,
+sir," said the pompous man, planting his foot on the topmost step,
+and bringing down his cane on the floor with the ring of a
+watchman's club. "It's trouble enough to come to your panorama,
+without being annoyed by all the young vagabonds in the
+village."</p>
+<p>"I'm sorry, sir," replied Tiffles, inwardly laughing, "but it
+would take six strong men to regulate the little rascals."</p>
+<p>"Then you ought to employ six strong men, sir. It's your
+business to see that your patrons are not insulted."</p>
+<p>Tiffles could only smile deprecatingly.</p>
+<p>"Every exhibition in this hall, for a year past," continued the
+man, "has been a humbug--an outrage on the common sense of mankind.
+Perhaps yours is an exception, though, to be candid, I have my
+doubts of it. Do I understand, sir, that you have travelled in
+Africa?"</p>
+<p>Tiffles indulged in the unjustifiable deception of nodding his
+head.</p>
+<p>"And you mean to say that the sketches for this panorama were
+taken on the spot?"</p>
+<p>"Yes, sir; on the spot--in a horn."</p>
+<p>"In a horn! What's that?"</p>
+<p>"A technical phrase, sir, which it is hardly worth while to
+explain at length. Briefly, however, I may say, that no more
+ingenious or satisfactory mode of taking sketches has been
+invented."</p>
+<p>"Oh! never mind the details. I hate the jargon of Art. I only
+wished to assure myself that I am not to be imposed on. Well, I
+think I will risk it, and go in. You can put us on a front seat, I
+suppose?"</p>
+<p>"First come, first served," said Tiffles, amiably, for he had
+reckoned up, and found that this party brought him a dollar and a
+quarter, counting the children as half prices, and the baby
+free.</p>
+<p>"Under these circumstances we will go in, though I must confess
+I expect to be disappointed. You will excuse my plain speaking."
+The thick-set gentleman thereupon thrust a hand into a pocket, and
+produced--not a huge roll of bank bills, or a half pint of silver,
+as Marcus, who eyed him sharply through the pigeon hole, had
+expected, but--a card, which he poked at Tiffles.</p>
+<p>Tiffles recognized it at the first glance. It was one of thirty
+complimentary tickets that he had caused to be distributed among
+the leading men of the village that morning, by advice of the
+landlord; and it bore the name of "C. Skimmerhorn, Esq."</p>
+<p>"Welcome, sir, welcome!" said Tiffles, as he observed the dollar
+and a quarter disappear from his mental horizon, and felt that, but
+for his indomitable good nature, he would like to kick C.
+Skimmerhorn, Esq., down stairs. And Tiffles, nobly concealing his
+disappointment, showed C. Skimmerhorn, Esq., and his domestic
+caravan to the best front seat. As he turned back to the door, he
+heard that gentleman say to his spouse, "That fellow looks like a
+humbug."</p>
+<p>A stream of people on the stairs gladdened his eyes. In one
+sweeping survey, he figured up three dollars. But they proved to be
+three clergymen, with faded wives, large families, and female
+relatives stopping with them. Each of the clergymen graciously
+informed Tiffles, on delivering up his family ticket, that a
+panorama was one of the few secular entertainments that he could
+consent to patronize. They doubted very much whether they could
+have been persuaded to come, but for the recommendation of their
+evangelical brethren in the city.</p>
+<p>Tiffles bowed acknowledgment of the empty honor, and ushered the
+three clergymen and families to the front row of seats, of which C.
+Skimmerhorn, Esq., and his train, occupied as much as they could
+cover by spreading out. Mr. Skimmerhorn recognized, in one of the
+clergymen, his beloved pastor, and proceeded, in a pleasant,
+off-hand manner, and a loud voice, to give a few of the reasons
+which inclined him to pronounce the panorama a humbug.</p>
+<p>"Being deadheads," sarcastically observed Tiffles to Marcus
+Wilkeson, "of course they come early, and take the best seats."</p>
+<p>The next customer was a poor but jovial mechanic, having a
+red-faced little wife slung on his arm. This humble individual paid
+down fifty cents in bright new silver to the grim treasurer,
+entered the hall, and took seats about halfway up. "It's a splendid
+affair, Sally, this 'ere pannyrammer, I'll bet anything." "Sha'n't
+we enjoy it, John!" returned that healthy young woman.</p>
+<p>More work for the amiable Tiffles, but none for the melancholy
+Wilkeson. Two more clergymen with families, the County Judge, the
+local railroad agent, all the members of the Board of Freeholders,
+and several other people, who, according to the landlord of the
+United States Hotel, were highly influential in moulding public
+opinion, and were in the habit of receiving free tickets.</p>
+<p>"Very good for a school of comparative anatomy," said Tiffles to
+Marcus (in facetious allusion to the deadheads), "but decidedly bad
+for my panorama."</p>
+<p>Marcus responded with a dreary smile through the pigeon
+hole.</p>
+<p>Then there came a few more mechanics and other plain people, and
+then a streak of fortune--an entire young ladies' seminary, headed
+by the preceptress, and divided into squads, each commanded by an
+assistant teacher acting as drill sergeant. They were admitted at
+half price (as per advertisement), and brought five dollars and
+sixty-two cents into the treasury. Tiffles rubbed his eyes at the
+sight of such a troop of blooming faces, and his hands at the
+thought of the grand accession to his cash box. The female seminary
+was accommodated with the two front rows of the best seats
+left.</p>
+<p>Following the seminary, in an unprecedented sequence of luck,
+was a boys' school, that came whooping up the stairway like a tribe
+of young Indians, in charge of a venerable sachem in spectacles. In
+the rush and excitement of the moment, several of them ran toll--a
+circumstance of which the old gentleman did not take cognizance
+when he settled with Marcus Wilkeson for their admission at twelve
+and a half cents <i>per capita</i>. Marcus had not noticed it, and
+Tiffles was far too generous to make a fuss about a few
+shillings.</p>
+<p>Then a party of six flashily dressed young men, who threw away
+their cigars as they came up stairs, and thrust their quarters
+through the pigeon hole at Marcus Wilkeson, as if they were good
+for nothing--which proved to be true of two of them. Being informed
+of the fact by Marcus, the owners of the counterfeits winked at
+each other, and whispered, "No go," and then offered a broken bill
+on a Connecticut bank. This also proved "no go," whereat the sharp
+practitioners winked again and laughed, and this time paid out good
+current coin. These were some of the fast men of the village. They
+took seats behind the female seminary.</p>
+<p>Luck changed again, and brought in the landlord, Mr. Persimmon,
+P.M., Mr. Boolpin, and three more free tickets, with their wives
+and families. Mr. Boolpin whispered in Tiffles's ear, that he hoped
+there wouldn't be a row; but it was a hard-looking crowd that had
+just gone in ahead of him. And there were plenty more of them
+coming.</p>
+<p>The latter observation proved true. The next minute, the stairs
+swarmed with a jovial party, under the leadership of a gorgeous
+person, who wore in the middle of his snowy shirt front a cluster
+diamond pin larger than a ten-cent piece. This was one of the
+gentlemanly conductors on the railroad; and the mixed company which
+he had the honor to command, was composed of ticket sellers,
+freight masters, brakemen, civil engineers, and clerks of liberal
+dispositions and small salaries in various walks of life. The party
+was slightly drunk, but not offensive. The gentlemanly conductor
+paid for himself and associates out of a huge side pocket full of
+loose silver. They rolled up the hall, and took the nearest spare
+seats to the female seminary.</p>
+<p>Seven and three quarters P.M. arrived. The people in the hall
+began to stamp with a noise like thunder. Tiffles had marked the
+heavy boots of the conductor, and could recognize them in the din.
+Several deep hisses varied the monotony of the performance. There
+were no persons coming up stairs. The small boys, Tiffles observed
+with astonishment, had vacated the building some time before, and
+could now be heard whispering quietly around the door below.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="G_CHAPTER_VI."></a>CHAPTER VI.</h2>
+<h3>HUMOUS OF THE MANY-HEADED.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Tiffles knew that his time had come, and he accepted the
+crisis.</p>
+<p>Requesting Marcus to pocket the funds, shut up the shop, and
+leave the door to take care of itself, Tiffles marched boldly to
+his doom. Previous to extinguishing the candles in the exhibition
+hall, he went behind the curtain, and there found the idiot sitting
+patiently at the crank, and rehearsing, in a low tone, the code of
+signals which had been adopted. Patching was also there. He
+shrugged his shoulders in the French style as Tiffles came in, but
+said not a word. Tiffles proceeded straight to a bottle which stood
+on a window sill, and took a long drink from it, and then passed it
+to Patching, who mutely did the same, and, in turn, handed it to
+the idiot, who pulled at it with great gusto, in the manner of a
+rational person.</p>
+<p>Feeling that it would be superfluous to repeat his instructions
+to so sagacious an idiot, Tiffles immediately presented himself
+before the audience again, with a long stick, or wand, for pointing
+out the beauties of the panorama.</p>
+<p>"Ladies and gentlemen, I am about to exhibit to you the Panorama
+of Africa. You have all heard of Africa."</p>
+<p>VOICE. "Consider'ble."</p>
+<p>"True, my friend; therefore you will be well prepared to enjoy
+the pictorial attractions which I am about to unfold."</p>
+<p>VOICE. "H'ist the rag."</p>
+<p>"My friend--who has no doubt paid his quarter--I respect your
+request. The rag <i>is</i> about to be h'isted. But, before that
+ceremony is proceeded with, I would ask the gentlemen sitting
+nearest the candles to be good enough to blow them out."</p>
+<p>Never was request more cheerfully complied with. There was a
+scramble of six or seven tall young men to each candle; and, at
+several of the candles, a brisk but friendly struggle took place
+between rival aspirants for the privilege. The room was then in
+total darkness, save a small gleam which came through the partly
+opened door from a solitary tallow in the entry, and the dull
+reflection of the panorama lights through the curtain.</p>
+<p>Some of the effects of this sudden extinguishment were
+extraordinary. The female seminary all screamed slightly. The boys'
+school all laughed, and several were heard to say, "Prime fun,
+a'n't it?" The railroad conductor and his friends coughed
+fictitiously, and said, "Oh! oh!" "A'n't you ashamed!" "Look out
+for pockets!" "Thief in the house!" and other playful things, which
+put the entire audience in good humor. But the strangest and most
+unexpected occurrence, was a grand rush, as of a herd of wild
+bulls, on the stairs, accompanied by the dousing of the one
+remaining light in the entry. Another moment, and over a hundred of
+the choicest juvenile spirits tore into the hall, and knocked over
+each other and everybody else in a frantic contest for free seats.
+The young ladies' seminary screamed in concert, and all the elderly
+ladies cried, "Oh my!" "Good gracious!" "What's that?"</p>
+<p>"Only the boys," said Tiffles, with unruffled composure. "Let
+them come. It is a moral entertainment, and will do them good."</p>
+<p>After a pause of about three minutes, giving the boys time to
+seat themselves, and the screams, mutterings, and laughter of the
+rest of the audience to die away, Tiffles said:</p>
+<p>"Now, ladies and gentlemen, I will introduce you to sunrise, in
+the Bight of Benin."</p>
+<p>This was the preconcerted signal for the raising of the curtain,
+which office was performed by Patching, without a hitch. The
+gorgeous proem, or introduction to the panorama, was then for the
+first time disclosed to the public. Patching blushed as he thought
+of the vile pandering to popular taste of which he had been
+guilty.</p>
+<p>There was a dead calm for a minute. Tiffles was silent, in order
+that he might not interrupt the quiet admiration of the spectators.
+The spectators were silent, because they could not exactly
+understand the scene, and did not know whether to laugh, hiss, or
+applaud. The silence was broken, by a boy in the back part of the
+hall:</p>
+<p>"I say, Mister, is that a cartwheel on top of a stonewall?"</p>
+<p>"No, sonny not exactly," said Tiffles. "What your uneducated
+eyes mistake for a cartwheel is the rising sun. The objects that
+your immature judgment confounds with spokes, are rays. Your stone
+wall, it is hardly necessary to inform riper intellects, is a
+distant range of mountains. It is one of Ceccarini's happiest
+efforts."</p>
+<p>"Hurrah for Checkerberry!" cried another lad, mistaking the name
+of the high (imaginary) Italian artist.</p>
+<p>"Are we to understand, sir, that this is a rolling prairie in
+the foreground?" asked a deep voice, which Tiffles at once
+recognized as emanating from C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.</p>
+<p>"Oh! no, sir; it is the Bight of Benin; and I must say, though,
+perhaps, I am too partial, that Ceccarini never did a better
+thing."</p>
+<p>"The <i>what</i> of Benin?" asked the voice.</p>
+<p>"The Bight--or, in other words, as you may not be familiar with
+geography, the Bay of Benin."</p>
+<p>"Then why not say Bay, sir?" replied C. Skimmerhorn Esq., stung
+with the allusion to his want of geographical knowledge. "Why this
+mystery about terms!"</p>
+<p>There were cries of "Go it, Square." "Dry up, old boy!" "Propel
+with the show!" &amp;c., &amp;c. Tiffles adopted the latter
+suggestion, and without answering the lawyer's insinuation,
+proceeded to point out the natural appearance of the waves, the
+truthfulness of the distant mountains, the absolute fidelity of the
+sunrise. "And here let me answer an objection in advance. It may be
+said that this sunrise does not look like a sunrise in Jersey.
+Admit it. Neither do the snakes (<i>sensation</i>)--neither do the
+snakes which I am about, to exhibit (<i>increased sensation</i> and
+Oh! me's! from the Young Ladies' Seminary) resemble the familiar
+green or striped serpent of your own peaceful fields. Neither do
+the tigers, which I shall presently have the honor of showing to
+you <i>(renewed sensation)</i>, bear any marked affinity to the
+serene woodchuck that burrows in your happy hills. The sunrises and
+sunsets, the boa constrictors, the tigers, and the other phenomena
+of Africa, are all immense, gorgeous, and peculiar. They must be
+judged by themselves, and not by comparison. My hearers will be
+kind enough to bear this in mind, as we go on."</p>
+<p>He then went on to repeat a great many statistics concerning the
+population and resources of Africa. He had read up for these facts
+and figures, under the impression that they would interest the
+solid portion of his audience. But he soon found out that he
+interested nobody (perhaps because the solid portion of audiences
+is a myth), and finally yielded to general requests of "Push
+ahead!" "Fire away!" "Start your train!" (the latter from the
+gentlemanly conductor and friends.)</p>
+<p>Tiffles therefore whistled once, and the panorama commenced
+moving slowly and steadily. The idiot, the rollers, and the lights,
+all worked well.</p>
+<p>From the Bight of Benin, the voyaging spectators took an
+excursion up the river.</p>
+<p>The uninterrupted stretch of deep blue for water, and light blue
+for sky, and green for the farther bank, with occasional palm trees
+looking like long-handled pickaxes, seemed to satisfy them. At any
+rate they looked on, and found no fault in words; which both
+Tiffles and Patching took for an auspicious sign. Tiffles kept step
+with his explanations.</p>
+<p>His method was this. When the palm tree came in sight, he would
+give a minute account of that noble tropical growth, and the many
+uses to which it and its products could be put. When a flock of
+wild ducks appeared sailing majestically on the river, he would
+entertain his auditors with a circumstantial description of how the
+natives caught wild ducks. A boat or hollow log, with a human
+figure, suggested a reference to the progress which the African had
+made in marine architecture and the science of navigation. In this
+way, Tiffles thought he was beguiling his customers. Some low
+sounds, like suppressed hisses, soon convinced him of his
+error.</p>
+<p>"I beg your pardon, Professor," said a thick-set voice, which he
+always recognized as coming from C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.; "but it
+seems to me that this portion of your panorama is a little
+monotonous. I presume that in this suggestion, I express the
+sentiments of my fellow citizens here assembled." Cries of "Go on,
+Square!" "That's so!" mingled with a vigorous stamping of feet and
+catcalls from the boys in the background, proved, alas! the truth
+of the conjecture.</p>
+<p>Tiffles coughed twice for the idiot to stop, and was sagaciously
+obeyed. "In behalf of Africa," he remarked, "representing her, as I
+may say, on this occasion, I would beg leave to apologize to the
+learned gentleman for the poverty of her scenery, at this stage of
+the panorama. If Africa had been aware of the learned gentleman's
+preferences, she would, doubtless, have got up some stunning
+effects for him in places where now you see only a river, a sky,
+and a strip of green bank, all unadorned, precisely as they
+are."</p>
+<p>The exquisite irony of this retort pleased the audience, and
+elicited general though faint applause, and several cries of "Shut
+up, Skim!" "Got your match, old boy!" "Oh! let the man go on!" The
+last remark issued from the gentlemanly conductor, and fell with
+peculiar pleasure on Tiffles's ears.</p>
+<p>"One word more, and I am done," resumed the lawyer, who was
+professionally calm amid scenes of disturbance. "I only wish to
+elicit the truth. Have you, and your artist (Mr. Chicory, I think
+you call him), or either of you, actually gone over the scenery
+here represented. We wish to understand that point!"</p>
+<p>"We have, both of us, gone over this scenery repeatedly." This
+was true, as both Tiffles and Patching, anticipating some such
+question, had stepped over the canvas back and forth, in rolling
+and unrolling it, several times. "Is the eminent counsellor
+satisfied?"</p>
+<p>"Oh! yes," said C. Skimmerhorn, Esq., in a voice which signified
+that he knew the panorama was a humbug, but, unfortunately,
+couldn't prove it.</p>
+<p>One cough, and the panorama started again--but a little too
+fast. Tiffles stamped once, and the idiot reduced the speed, until
+it was too slow. Two stamps brought it right. The river soon
+disappeared in a swamp, where the alligators' heads protruding
+above the water gave Tiffles an opportunity to describe several
+terrific combats which he had enjoyed with those pugnacious
+creatures. This entertained the audience for several minutes.</p>
+<p>"Have you no full views of alligators, sir?" asked a voice which
+Tiffles presumed, from its solemn inflection, to come from a
+clergyman.</p>
+<p>"None at all, sir. The African alligator persists in keeping out
+of sight. You never see anything but his head--except his tail, as
+represented here." Tiffles pointed with his wand to something that
+looked like the end of a fence rail sticking out of the water.
+"True Art, sir, sacrifices effect for Truth."</p>
+<p>"Certainly, sir. Truth is what we are all after," replied the
+clergyman. But there was an indefinable something in his voice that
+indicated a wish for more alligator--much more.</p>
+<p>The swamp ended in a dry jungle, interspersed with palm trees,
+elephants, lions, tigers, and serpents. Tiffles counted upon
+interesting his audience here. Snakes were first on the list. Two
+heads, with expanded jaws and forked tongues, were looking at each
+other above the jungle, and two tails were interlocked, also above
+the jungle, a few feet off. This conveyed the idea of two boa
+constrictors fighting. Other heads and other tails--there was
+always a tail for every head--stuck up at regular intervals about.
+He stopped the panorama with a cough, and said:</p>
+<p>"The entire population of this particular jungle are--boa
+constrictors of unprecedented size and ferocity."</p>
+<p>Tiffles heard a rustle of fans and dresses not far off. It was
+the whole female seminary shuddering. There was also a general
+movement throughout the audience as of people adjusting themselves
+to obtain a good sight.</p>
+<p>"These boa constrictors, so admirably delineated
+here,"--commenced Tiffles.</p>
+<p>"Where?" said the voice of a country gentleman. "I don't see any
+bore constructors."</p>
+<p>"Nor I." "Nor I." "Trot 'em out!" "Show 'em up!" "Produce your
+snakes!" Such were the remarks that resounded through the hall.</p>
+<p>"Oh, no!" "Don't!" "Please don't!" emanated from several girlish
+voices.</p>
+<p>"My fair auditors have no cause for alarm. I have no living
+snakes to show. I might have captured several hundred, and brought
+them to this country and exhibited them, but, in deference to the
+well-known aversion cherished toward snakes by cultivated
+communities, I forbore to do so. The only boa constrictors that I
+have, are now before you. These are their heads. These their tails"
+(indicating the termini of the snakes).</p>
+<p>Now, the spectators--or a large number of them--had suffered
+fearful expectations of seeing real snakes. When, therefore, it was
+announced that these harmless daubs, resembling, at a distance,
+some variety of tropical vegetation, were the only snakes they were
+to see, there was a feeling, first, of relief, and then of
+disappointment.</p>
+<p>The disappointment manifested itself in low hisses, and
+exclamations, such as "Humbug!" "Gammon!" "Swindle!" Tiffles made
+several beginnings of excellent snake stories, of which he was the
+hero, but was checked by the tumult. Finding the snakes were not
+popular, he determined to try the tigers, lions, and other beasts
+of prey farther on. He coughed once emphatically, and the canvas
+moved like clockwork.</p>
+<p>Before it had journeyed five feet, somebody on the front row of
+seats coughed twice in precisely the same manner as Tiffles. The
+idiot, supposing the signal came from his employer, stopped.
+Tiffles, perceiving the mistake, coughed again, and the motion was
+resumed; when a double cough resounded from the front seat, and the
+motion ceased.</p>
+<p>Then Tiffles realized that his system of signals was understood
+by somebody. What should he do? He could not stop the free,
+universal right to cough. Therefore he stepped to the corner of the
+curtain, raised it, and said, in a voice loud enough to be heard by
+the audience, "Stoop, whenever I want you to 'stop,' or 'go on,' or
+'faster,' or 'slower,' I will say so. You understand?"</p>
+<p>"Puffickly," replied the gifted idiot.</p>
+<p>"I say, boys, Stoop's in there," shouted the somebody that had
+coughed.</p>
+<p>"Stoop!" "Stoop!" "Bully for Stoop!" "Come out o' that, Stoop!"
+was shouted all over the house; but Stoop remained faithful to his
+post, and calmly ground away at the crank.</p>
+<p>Suddenly it occurred to some boy to yell, "Boo! boo!" whereat
+the other boys laughed, and took up the chorus, "Boo! boo!"</p>
+<p>The canvas moved less steadily, slackening for a moment, and
+then shooting ahead, as if the propelling power were the subject of
+strange perturbation. The roguish boys, and the men too, and, chief
+of them, that practical humorist of a conductor, observing this,
+screamed, "Boo! boo! boo I boo!" all the louder. Tiffles knew that
+the critical time had come, and philosophically laughed at the ruin
+of his last grand project, as he had laughed at the ruin of forty
+other grand projects in their day.</p>
+<p>The panorama stopped without a signal this time. A hoarse voice
+screamed, "Gorryfus! Gosh thunder! By jimminy!" The curtain was
+jerked aside, and Stoop rushed into the hall like a fury. Coming
+out of a place partly lighted into one totally dark, his first move
+was to run blindly into Tiffles, nearly knocking that gentleman off
+his legs.</p>
+<p>"Hold on, Stoop! Hold on!" shouted Tiffles, with what was left
+of his breath. But the idiot only screamed, "Gosh thunder!
+Gorryfus!" and darted for the main aisle, intending to run a muck
+among his persecutors. There was a general scrambling of the boys
+to avoid this incarnated wrath. The whole female seminary, and all
+the ladies present, screamed together.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="G_CHAPTER_VII."></a>CHAPTER VII.</h2>
+<h3>SCENES NOT IN THE BILLS.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The enraged idiot struck out right and left, without hurting
+anybody--the objects of his vengeance contriving to elude him in
+the dark. Most of the sturdy blows which he dealt, using his arms
+like flails, fell upon the railings of the seats, and only bruised
+his hands. Just as he had caught a boy by the collar, and was about
+to take a twist in his hair, the door opened, and a light appeared.
+It came from three candles borne by three men.</p>
+<p>This apparition caused the furious idiot to suspend hostilities
+on the instant.</p>
+<p>All eyes were turned toward the three men. All voices were
+hushed. There was a whisper in the air that something strange was
+about to happen.</p>
+<p>The man who entered first was a stranger, who moved and looked
+about in the quick, nervous way born of city life. The other two
+men were well-known residents of the village. Some of the audience
+had had unpleasant cause to know them.</p>
+<p>Having locked the door, and stationed his associates in a
+position to command the windows, the stranger walked quickly up the
+aisle, bearing his lighted candle, and said, in a loud voice, which
+fell strangely on the hushed assemblage:</p>
+<p>"Marcus Wilkeson will be kind enough to give himself up. Upon my
+honor, he cannot escape." This was said with a charming
+politeness.</p>
+<p>A tall figure arose at the wall end of one of the back seats. "I
+am Marcus Wilkeson. What do you want with me, sir?" His voice
+trembled, and his face was livid.</p>
+<p>"To go with me to New York, Mr. Wilkeson," said the tall
+stranger, quickly. "Thank you for your promptness in answering. The
+only clue that I had, was the hasty measure I took of you this
+morning, when I was watching for an escaped convict at
+Cortlandt-street ferry. Perhaps you remember seeing me there,
+sir?"</p>
+<p>Marcus, though the sudden shock had almost stunned him, at once
+recalled the man who had eyed him narrowly at the ferry that
+morning.</p>
+<p>The two other candle bearers had stepped forward as Marcus
+declared himself, and were about to lay hold of him, when the first
+man smilingly pushed them back, and said:</p>
+<p>"Don't touch him. It's all right. Mr. Wilkeson is a gentleman,
+and will go quietly."</p>
+<p>To Marcus he said, apologetically:</p>
+<p>"Two Jersey constables I got to assist me. They don't do things
+exactly in the style of Detective Leffingwell."</p>
+<p>Marcus recognized the name; and so terrified was he at the
+thoughts which it conjured up, that his tongue clove to the roof of
+his mouth. The scene was like a horrid dream.</p>
+<p>"Everything is regular, sir," continued the detective. "We have
+a requisition for you from the Governor of this State. It was
+obtained by telegraph from Trenton. You will excuse my dropping on
+you in this way; but I wanted to take you to New York to-night, as
+the inquest meets again at ten o'clock to-morrow morning."</p>
+<p>"The inquest!--what inquest? Tell me, in God's name!" said
+Marcus, finding his voice at last.</p>
+<p>"Inquest! There must have been a murder committed." "What is
+it?" "Tell us, Mr. Policeman." The question was asked on all
+sides.</p>
+<p>"Now I <i>didn't</i> want a scene," said Detective Leffingwell,
+politely, "and I won't have one. Mr. Wilkeson and I understand each
+other. The word 'inquest' dropped out of my mouth before I
+thought."</p>
+<p>"As heaven is above us, we do not understand each other!" said
+Marcus. "Tell me, pray tell me at once, or I shall go mad."</p>
+<p>"Anything to please you," replied the officer; "but I can't bear
+these explanations in public. It isn't my way of doing business."
+He then leaned forward, and whispered in the ear of Marcus.</p>
+<p>"Great God!" was all that Marcus could say. Then he sank to the
+seat, and bowed his head in agony.</p>
+<p>Tiffles, who had forced his way to his friend's side during the
+excitement, threw his arms about him, and said:</p>
+<p>"Never mind appearances, Marcus. I'll stake my life you are
+innocent of the charge, whatever it is."</p>
+<p>"Oh! you're a humbug," remarked C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.</p>
+<p>"Call me and my panorama a humbug, if you please; but Mr.
+Wilkeson is a gentleman and a man of honor." Tiffles's face beamed
+with a strange kindness. He looked up, and saw the idiot standing
+near him. His small eyes filled with tears as he gazed with an
+expression of intelligent pity at the crushed man. Tiffles could
+have hugged the idiot, not only as the most sensible man, but the
+best-hearted one he had seen in the village.</p>
+<p>C. Skimmerhorn, Esq., would have retorted severely, but his
+attention, and that of all the crowd, was drawn, at that moment, to
+a citizen who came forward, and, in a state of beathless
+excitement, said he guessed he knew what it all meant. He was in
+New York that afternoon, and read, in one of the evening papers, an
+account of a dreadful murder committed on an old man named Minford.
+The supposed murderer, the paper said, was a Mr. Wilkes or
+Wilkson.</p>
+<p>"Now I hope you are satisfied," said Detective Leffingwell,
+looking around with contempt at his hearers.</p>
+<p>A slight scream was heard from the corner of a seat near by.
+From the beginning of this unpleasant affair, it was observed that
+a plainly dressed woman--a seamstress accompanying the family of a
+Mr. Graft--had become very pale and nervous, and had been seen to
+move uneasily in her seat. This woman had fainted away. She it was
+who had stared so strangely at Marcus in the car that morning.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Graft and her two daughters promptly removed the fainting
+woman to the entry, where the fresh air soon restored her, and she
+was sent home.</p>
+<p>"No wonder the women faint away, when you crowd round here so
+stupidly," said the officer, momentarily losing his temper. "Please
+step back, now, and let Mr. Wilkeson and me get out. We must leave
+for New York by the next train--and that starts in fifteen
+minutes." The detective referred to his watch. "Are you ready,
+sir?" tapping Marcus gently on the shoulder.</p>
+<p>Marcus rose, and displayed a face haggard with grief.</p>
+<p>They all whispered, or thought, "He is guilty."</p>
+<p>"I am ready," said he; "but I call heaven to witness that I know
+nothing of this crime."</p>
+<p>The detective bowed courteously, and then said:</p>
+<p>"I also have summons for Mr. Tiffles and Mr. Patching, gentlemen
+connected with this panorama, as witnesses. They will please step
+forward."</p>
+<p>"I am Mr. Tiffles," said that person. "Wesley is my panoramic
+name."</p>
+<p>This disclosure caused a small sensation. "I knew the man was a
+humbug from the start," whispered C. Skimmerhorn, Esq., to a friend
+at his elbow. "I'd like to prosecute him for swindling."</p>
+<p>"And I am Mr. Patching," exclaimed the artist, presenting
+himself.</p>
+<p>It should be here stated, that, when the disturbances of the
+evening first set in, Patching, in pure disgust at the bad taste of
+the audience, had quietly dropped himself out of the second story
+window at the rear of the stage, and had been skulking in the back
+lot ever since. Having heard, outside, of the arrest of Marcus
+Wilkeson, on an unknown charge, he had plucked up courage and
+friendship enough to reenter the hall, and tender his aid and
+consolation to that unhappy man. He came in just in time to hear
+his name called.</p>
+<p>"So that's the chap they called Chicory, or Checkerberry,"
+whispered C. Skimmerhorn, Esq. "Anybody can see he is a swindler by
+his slouched hat, and beard. <i>Shouldn't</i> I enjoy having a good
+case against him!"</p>
+<p>Pigworth, J. P., landlord of the United States Hotel, and Mr.
+Boolpin, proprietor, came forward with their little bills, and
+demanded immediate payment. This financial difficulty was arranged
+in one minute by the genius of Wesley Tiffles. After paying Stoop
+one dollar and a half (that excellent idiot crying, and vowing that
+he didn't want it), the rest of the proceeds, deducting enough for
+fares to New York, were divided equally between the two other
+creditors; and the panorama and all the appurtenances were left as
+a joint security for remaining obligations. The panorama was worth
+twice the debts, to be cut into window shades. After some
+grumbling, Messrs. Pigworth and Boolpin accepted the terms.</p>
+<p>Five minutes later, the polite detective and his party started
+for New York. There was a great number of people at the station to
+see them off, but only one to say "good-by." That one was the
+man-boy Stoop, who cried as if his great, simple heart would
+break.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_EIGHTH."></a>BOOK EIGHTH.</h2>
+<h3>A DRAMATIC INTERLUDE.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="H_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>THE OVERTURE.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>It was the last of a delightful series of dramatic nights at
+Mrs. Slapman's; and her house was quite filled with embodied
+Poetry, Travels, Dramatic Literature, Music, Art, and the
+Sciences.</p>
+<p>The dramatic arrangements of Mrs. Slapman's house were simple,
+but effective. A curtain, with rings, hung across the north end of
+the parlor, established the confines of the stage, which was on a
+level with the floor, and covered with green baize to represent
+rural scenes, or a three-ply carpet to indicate refined interiors.
+Against the wall were rollers, from which scenes could be dropped,
+affording perspectives of country, or streets, or gilded saloons,
+as the necessities of the drama required. There were six of these
+scenes, all painted by Patching (to oblige Mrs. Slapman) in his
+leisure moments, which were numerous; and they all exhibited
+evidences of his style. Six sets of flies, or side scenes, matching
+with the rear views, had been executed by a scene-painter's
+assistant, whom Mrs. Slapman had taken under her patronage, and
+were thought, by some persons, superior to Patching's efforts. Such
+was the belittling criticism to which that great artist was
+constantly subjected. There was a space of about four feet between
+the top of the curtain and the high ceiling. The light from the
+parlor chandelier directly in front, aided by six gas jets behind
+the scenes, made the whole performance and performers as clear as
+noonday.</p>
+<p>This miniature theatre was constructed of portable frames, which
+could be put up or taken down in half an hour, and was the
+ingenious invention of the scene-painter's assistant. When it was
+removed, the only traces of its former presence were two
+brass-headed spikes in the walls, from which the side curtains
+depended.</p>
+<p>These spikes imparted anguish to the mind of Mr. Slapman
+whenever he gazed upon them. Mrs. S. had heard him say, that "some
+people would look well hanging up there." By "some people," he was
+supposed to mean the gentlemen who participated in her dramatic
+entertainments. Mrs. S. bore the cruel remark meekly, merely
+replying that perhaps he had better try the strength of the spikes
+first, by suspending himself from one of them.</p>
+<p>The audience, usually numbering about fifty, were seated in
+chairs, which filled the parlor, with the exception of a space of
+ten feet in front of the stage. A fair view of the entire
+proceedings could be had from all but the two back rows of chairs,
+the occupants of which were compelled to imagine the attachment of
+feet and ankles to the several characters of the drama.</p>
+<p>From the left wing of the stage a door opened into the hall,
+affording communication by the staircase to the ladies' and
+gentlemen's dressing rooms on the floor above. On the third floor
+(it was known to some of the guests) was the private apartment of
+Mr. Slapman. A strong smell of cigar smoke, as of one fumigating
+sullenly and furiously, was the unvarying proof of his presence in
+the house. On this eventful night, he had been seen, at an early
+hour, pacing up and down the hall of his third floor, belching
+forth clouds of smoke, like Vesuvius just before a fiery
+eruption.</p>
+<p>People who were in the sad secret of Mrs. Slapman's household
+sorrows, looked at each other and smiled, but said nothing; for it
+was a point of good breeding not to allude to him in conversation.
+The newer guests, unaware of the melancholy facts in the case,
+supposed that the restless gentleman on the third floor was some
+one of Mrs. Slapman's eccentric friends, working out an idea. Mrs.
+Slapman paid no attention to her jealous spouse, imagining that he
+would smoke away his wrath quietly, as usual, and not interfere
+with the evening's amusement. Hitherto, on occasions, he had done
+nothing more disagreeable than to open the parlor door furtively,
+cast one wild look inside, and then suddenly withdraw his head,
+gently slamming the door after him.</p>
+<p>The play of the evening was written "expressly for the occasion"
+by a gentleman who had produced one melodrama at a Bowery theatre,
+and failed to produce a large number of melodramas at all the
+theatres in Broadway. Mrs. Slapman, a true patroness of genius,
+kindly permitted this gentleman to prepare all her charades, and
+gratified him, on several occasions by bringing out some of the
+minor plays from his stuffed portfolio.</p>
+<p>By eight o'clock all the chairs were filled, and the actors and
+actresses were still lingering over their toilet. After waiting ten
+minutes longer, and crossing and uncrossing their legs repeatedly,
+the audience stamped and whistled very much in the manner of an
+impatient crowd at a real theatre. Mrs. Slapman relished these
+little ebullitions of natural feeling, because it made the illusion
+of her "Thespian parlor" (as she called it) more complete.</p>
+<p>At eight and a quarter o'clock, the orchestra, consisting of two
+flutes and a violin, issued from behind the curtain, and seated
+itself before some music stands ranged against the wall. The
+performers were amateurs (two bookkeepers, and a cashier in private
+life), and could not have been hired to play for any amount of
+money, though they were always willing to favor a few friends. Mrs.
+Slapman humored them in this whim, and they played regularly at her
+private theatricals.</p>
+<p>After a few nods and facetious remarks to their friends in the
+audience (familiarities from which a paid orchestra would have been
+totally cut off), the musicians dashed into a new overture,
+composed by Signor Mancussi, also "expressly for the occasion."</p>
+<p>This musical composition had been rehearsed the week previous in
+the presence of a select party of amateurs and critics, and had
+been pronounced, by the sub-editor of a weekly paper, "remarkable
+for its breadth and color." Under these circumstances, the overture
+was listened to with much interest at first, which abated as the
+music progressed. Touching the merits of "color" and "breadth"
+there might be some grounds of doubt, but none whatever concerning
+its "length."</p>
+<p>It lasted until twenty minutes of nine; and, toward the close,
+faint scrapings of dissatisfaction were heard, which would have
+been more audible had Signor Mancussi not been present. As the last
+twang of the fiddle died on the air, M. Bartin was heard by several
+persons to say, "Bah! a bad hash from Rossini and Auber." The
+remark was reported to Signor Mancussi, and did not tend to enhance
+his friendly regards for the other gentleman.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="H_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>CURTAIN UP.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>At eight and three quarters P.M. the curtain was rung up, and
+discovered a rustic scene, in the midst of which Mrs. Slapman
+(Fidelia) was seated. She was dressed in a white frock with low
+neck, and a flat hat, and was trimmed out with red ribbons in all
+directions. She looked young and pretty. Only an anxious knitting
+of her eyebrows revealed the cares and troubles of intellect. Mrs.
+Slapman was applauded by a unanimous clapping of hands. She was
+seated in a red-velvet rocking chair, at a small but costly table,
+on which stood an expensive vase filled with flowers. These
+properties, though few, were intended to signify boundless
+affluence and luxury. Fidelia languidly waved a jewelled fan, and
+sighed. "Will he never come?" said she.</p>
+<p>She had hardly made this remark, when, by a singular
+coincidence, Alberto (Overtop) entered from the left wing, and
+threw himself, with as much grace as his tights would permit, at
+her feet. She emitted a small shriek, and gave him her hand to
+kiss, which he did with ecstasy. Alberto was habited like an
+Italian gentleman in good circumstances; and no one would have
+suspected his poverty, if he had not commenced the dialogue by an
+affecting allusion to his last <i>scudi</i>, which brought tears to
+the eyes of the fair Fidelia.</p>
+<p>Such trifling questions as lovers alone can ask and answer then
+passed between them; and at last came the solemn interrogatory from
+the kneeling Alberto: "And will you always love me, dearest?"</p>
+<p>Fidelia turned her meek orbs toward the ceiling, raised her
+hand, said "<i>Forever!</i>" and was about to add, "I swear," when
+Bidette (Miss Wick) rushed upon the scene with the intelligence,
+"He comes."</p>
+<p>"Who?" asked Alberto.</p>
+<p>"My father!" shrieked Fidelia. "Go--that way." She pointed with
+her small alabaster hand to the left wing.</p>
+<p>Alberto vanished as per request, while Fidelia, with
+well-affected calmness, commenced humming an opera air, and fanning
+herself. Bidette, the favorite maid, pretended to readjust a flower
+in her mistress's hair. These feminine artifices were to throw the
+coming father off his scent.</p>
+<p>But the father (Mr. Johnsone, the junior of a small
+book-publishing house) was sharp eyed, though he lacked spectacles.
+As he emerged from the right wing, he caught a distinct view of a
+pair of soles disappearing in the distance, and benignantly asked:
+"Who is that, my child?"</p>
+<p>The child answered: "Only the postman, pa."</p>
+<p>"Where is the letter?" he asked.</p>
+<p>"Please, sir," interrupted Bidette, observing her mistress's
+confusion, "there wasn't no letter. He mistook the house for
+another, sir."</p>
+<p>The father nodded his head to express his complete satisfaction
+with this explanation, and then told Bidette to leave the spot, as
+he had something of the utmost importance to tell his daughter.
+Bidette pouted, and withdrew, giving a bewitching shake of her
+striped calico dress, to signify her hatred of brutal fathers. This
+touch of nature drew plaudits from those among the audience who
+were but slightly acquainted with Miss Wick. The others looked on
+with critical indifference.</p>
+<p>The father took a chair, thrust out his legs like a reigning
+prince, and proceeded, in a story of unnecessary length, to tell
+his daughter that he owed one hundred and seventy thousand florins
+to Signor Rodicaso, and would be a ruined man in forty-eight hours
+if that sum were not paid. Life, in that event, would be simply
+insupportable. He had procured a pistol to blow out his brains, but
+had subsequently concluded to make one more effort to save himself.
+He would, therefore, appeal to his daughter, <i>as</i> a father,
+and ask her to marry Signor Rodicaso, and so liquidate the debt,
+to-morrow. He did not wish to influence her choice--far from
+it--but, if she did not consent, he should feel under the painful
+necessity of shooting himself on the spot.</p>
+<p>The father produced a pistol, and held it to his left ear.</p>
+<p>Fidelia, looking like a marble statue of grief, said, in a low
+but perfectly audible voice: "Stay! I will wed him." This was
+enunciated with the calmness of despair. Not a gesture, nor a
+twinge of the features, nor an accent to indicate emotion of any
+kind. It was in quiet efforts like these that Mrs. Slapman
+excelled.</p>
+<p>When the applause elicited by this stroke of genius had ceased,
+Mr. Chickson (Signor Rodicaso) came rather awkwardly upon the
+stage. His eyes (and, it might be added, his legs) rolled absently
+about, as if he were endeavoring to recall his part, or were in the
+inward act of composing a poem.</p>
+<p>"Your future husband, Fidelia," said the father.</p>
+<p>Fidelia rose from her seat--still imperturbable.</p>
+<p>Chickson advanced with a sliding motion, and then paused, as if
+he had forgotten what to do. Mrs. Slapman was heard to whisper
+something (probably the cue), but he only rolled his eyes heavily
+in response. A look of displeasure marred her serene features, and,
+instead of fainting away in Signor Rodicaso's arms, as she should
+have done, she dropped into the embrace of her father, taking that
+personage quite unexpectedly, and nearly knocking him off his
+chair.</p>
+<p>Chickson projected himself forward at the same time to catch
+her, and, in so doing, lost his balance, and just escaped, by an
+effort, from sprawling on the floor.</p>
+<p>Then he looked helplessly at the audience; and there was no
+longer any doubt entertained that Chickson was slightly
+intoxicated. Getting drunk, now and then, was an infirmity of
+Chickson's genius.</p>
+<p>The stage manager had the good sense to ring down the curtain on
+this painful scene, and, the next moment, there was a dull sound,
+as of somebody falling on the floor behind the green baize.</p>
+<p>After an interval of fifteen minutes--protracted by the
+"unexpected indisposition" of the poet, and the consequent
+necessity of intrusting Signor Rodicaso to other hands--the curtain
+rises again, and discloses Alberto in a humble cot, surrounded by
+three-legged stools, and other evidences of extreme poverty. He is
+seated on a rickety table (in preference to the greater uncertainty
+of the stools), his arms are folded, and his head droops upon his
+breast.</p>
+<p>In this attitude, he begins to soliloquize, and informs the
+audience (what they did not know before) that, from a clump of
+shrubbery, he had seen fully as much as they of the preceding
+scene. He does not blame Fidelia. Oh! no. In her cruel dilemma, she
+could do no less. But he curses--and curses again--and continues to
+curse for some time--that Fate which deprives him of the "paltry
+means" (one hundred and seventy thousand florins) to buy off the
+"heartless monster" (Rodicaso). Having wreaked himself upon Destiny
+to his own satisfaction, he suddenly remembers that he has not
+eaten anything for thirty-six hours. He feels in all his pockets
+successively, but finds nothing. He then draws from his bosom a
+portrait of his father, set with antique gems. He gazes upon it
+reverently, kisses it, and says: "Shall I part with this sacred
+memento for vulgar bread? Never! Let me die!" He restores the
+portrait to his bosom, folds his arms again, inclines his head, and
+shuts his eyes, as if preparing to expire comfortably.</p>
+<p>All this time, a fat red face, belonging to a corpulent body,
+has been watching the depressed lover from the right wing. As
+Alberto utters the last sad ejaculation, a thick hand attached to a
+short arm raises a kerchief to a pair of small eyes in this fat red
+face, and wipes them. Then the stout gentleman reflects a moment,
+nods his head approvingly, draws forth a wallet, opens it slowly,
+takes out some paper that rustles like bank notes, produces a
+memorandum book, writes a few lines on one of the leaves hastily
+with a pencil, tears out the leaf, encloses the leaf and the bank
+notes in an envelope, emerges with his entire figure into the full
+light of the stage, walks stealthily toward Alberto with a pair of
+creaking shoes that would have waked the soundest sleeper, places
+the note on the table by his side, raises his hands to heaven,
+murmuring, "God bless the boy!" and retires in the same feline but
+tumultuous manner.</p>
+<p>This mysterious visitor was Bignolio (Matthew Maltboy), a rich
+money lender, uncle of Alberto, and commonly reported to be the
+"tightest old skinflint in Venice."</p>
+<p>After a pause, scarcely long enough to allow his uncle's heavy
+footsteps to die away in the distance, Alberto came out of his
+revery. His first act was to look at the ceiling, then at the
+floor, then all about him--everywhere but at the note on the table.
+At last, when nothing else remained to be scrutinized, his eyes
+naturally fell upon this valuable communication.</p>
+<p>"What is this?" he asked. Then he answered his own question by
+opening the letter, and reading it, as follows:</p>
+<blockquote>Venice, Oct. 16,----.<br>
+Dear Nephew:<br>
+<br>
+I have watched you, and know all. You are indeed the son of your
+father, and, I am proud to add, the nephew of your uncle. Enclosed
+are sixty thousand florins. Go to Jinkerini Bros., on the Rialto,
+and buy up judgments that they hold against Rodicaso for three
+times that amount, and offset them against old Corpetto's debts.
+Rodicaso conceals his property so well, that none has ever been
+found to satisfy these judgments. Drive a sharp bargain, and show
+yourself a chip of the old block. Keep the balance for your wedding
+gift.<br>
+<br>
+Farewell--till we meet again.<br>
+Bignolio.</blockquote>
+<p>"Dear, dear uncle!" exclaimed Alberto, carefully buttoning up
+his pocket over the funds, and kissing the letter in transports of
+joy. "And only yesterday he would not lend me a <i>scudi</i> to get
+my dinner. Generous man! how have I wronged him! Now, Fate, I will
+floor thee and Rodicaso together."</p>
+<p>[Exit Alberto, rapidly, by shortest land route to the
+Rialto.]</p>
+<p>Overtop's acting, throughout this difficult scene, was of a
+superior order. Nothing could be more natural, for instance, than
+the buttoning up of his pocket over his uncle's gift. But neither
+that, nor the other strong point, where he exulted in the finest
+tragedy tones over the anticipated downfall of Fate and Rodicaso,
+produced the slightest sensation among his hearers. Matthew Maltboy
+paid the penalty of his intimate relations with Overtop, by an
+equal unpopularity. His fine rendition of the character of Bignolio
+might as well have been played to a select company of
+gravestones.</p>
+<p>There was a necessary interval of twenty minutes for the fitting
+out of the stage--during which time the amateur orchestra performed
+selections from "Semiramide," but, happily, not loud enough to
+interfere with the easy flow of conversation all over the room. The
+second flutist, while looking over his shoulder angrily at the
+garrulous audience, executed a false note, which almost threw the
+first (and only) violinist into fits. In turning round to rebuke
+the errant performer, the violinist struck his elbow against a
+similar projection of the other flutist, and knocked a false note
+out of that gentleman too, besides momentarily ruffling his temper.
+This little episode diffused unhappiness over the entire music.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="H_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>ACT SECOND.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The spectators had been told that there were imposing stage
+effects in the second and last act; and they were not disappointed.
+The entire front was filled with furniture, real mahogany and
+brocade, leaving barely room for human beings to walk about. The
+background was a perspective of pillars, conveying the idea of
+unlimited saloons, all opening into each other. Three Bohemian
+vases, filled with natural flowers, were placed on pedestals in
+places where they would be least in the way, if it were possible to
+make such a discrimination. But the great feature of the scene was
+a magnificent paper chandelier of nine candles, which hung from the
+centre of the framework, and made every spectator, while he
+admired, tremble with fear that it would set the house on fire.</p>
+<p>At a small table in front, covered by a rich cloth, sat the
+heroine, dressed in a gorgeousness of apparel that mocked her
+misery. Beneath the gems that studded her bosom, there was supposed
+to be unappeasable wretchedness; and the white brow, covered with a
+spangled wreath, was presumed to ache with mental agony. She was
+pale and beautiful. Murmurs of applause ran round the
+apartment.</p>
+<p>By her side was the faithful Bidette, armed with a bottle of
+salts. She bent affectionately over her mistress, and asked if she
+wanted anything.</p>
+<p>"Nothing, my child--but death," was the thrilling reply.</p>
+<p>Bidette was taken somewhat aback. She made a respectful pause.
+Then she said:</p>
+<p>"But, my dear mistress, though you do not love Signor
+Rodicaso--"</p>
+<p>"In Heaven's name, stop, child! You are piercing my heart with a
+hot iron. Name not love to me. Henceforth I erase it from the
+tablets of my brain. Now go on" (with tranquil despair).</p>
+<p>"I was about to say, dear mistress, please, that Signor Rodicaso
+has a splendid town house, and a beautiful country seat (they say),
+and thousands of acres of land, which will all be yours--"</p>
+<p>The eloquent grief of her mistress's face checked the maid.</p>
+<p>"Bidette," she said, "I shall want but a small portion of all
+his lands."</p>
+<p>"What do you mean, dear mistress?" asked the frightened
+maid.</p>
+<p>"Only enough for--a grave," was the harrowing reply.</p>
+<p>This dreary dialogue was here interrupted by the appearance of
+the father in tights, knee buckles, velvet coat, ruffles, a
+powdered wig, and a general air of having been got up for a great
+occasion. He carefully picked his way through the furniture to his
+daughter, and kissed her on the forehead.</p>
+<p>"Are you happy, my dear daughter?" he asked.</p>
+<p>"Happy? Oh! yes, father, I am <i>so</i> happy! See how I smile."
+So saying, she made a feeble attempt to smile, which was a most
+artistic failure, and brought out another tribute of applause.</p>
+<p>The father, not detecting the sad irony of the smile,
+replied:</p>
+<p>"It is indeed fortunate that you are enabled not only to achieve
+your own happiness by this marriage, but also to redeem what is
+dearer to me than all else in this world--my mercantile credit. But
+here they come."</p>
+<p>"Here they come," was the cue which was to bring in Signor
+Rodicaso and party; but the Signor was momentarily delayed by the
+giving way of two buttons in his doublet. When he had repaired
+damages with pins as well as he could, he emerged into view,
+accompanied by a notary and a pair of friendly witnesses. The
+Signor, this time, proved to be the author of the play, who had
+kindly consented, at five minutes' notice, to take the part in
+which the hapless Chickson had broken down. Stealing behind, in the
+shadow of the others, was distinctly seen (by all except the people
+on the stage) the burly form of Uncle Bignolio.</p>
+<p>To satisfy the conventional idea of dramatic concealment, his
+left leg was plunged in obscurity behind the scenes, while the rest
+of his figure stood out in bold relief. He was observed, by those
+who watched him narrowly, to send a pleasant wink and nod to
+Bidette, who responded with a scarcely perceptible pout.</p>
+<p>On the entrance of Signor Rodicaso and friends, Fidelia rose,
+turned toward them, and made a profound courtesy, as if to signify
+her abject submission. Signor Rodicaso bowed with equal profundity,
+and straightway proceeded to make a speech to the lady, in which he
+spoke of the wild idolatry that he had long felt for her, and
+alluded most disparagingly to his own merits. If the Signor's
+statements could be relied on, he was totally unworthy of an
+alliance with the beautiful Fidelia; in fact, was a "dog who would
+be proud only but to bask in the sunshine of her smile."</p>
+<p>This singular address, extending over "one length," or
+forty-five lines, excited little less astonishment on the stage
+than in the audience. For it was not set down in the acting copy,
+but had been improvised by the author, to better the part of the
+Signor, which, as originally written, was destitute of Long and
+effective orations.</p>
+<p>Fidelia smiled, and could only reply to this unpremeditated
+effusion by several modest inclinations of the head. The other
+actors and actress turned aside to conceal their grins. Uncle
+Bignolio alone fulfilled the requirements of his part, by casting
+Mephistophelean leers at the Signor, and now and then stealthily
+shaking his fists at him.</p>
+<p>The father, not being apt at off-hand oratory, did not attempt
+any response to this speech, but merely bowed, to express his
+perfect agreement in everything that had been said, and waved his
+hand toward a table in the rear of the stage, as if to say, "Let us
+proceed to business."</p>
+<p>The notary, taking the hint, seated himself at the table, opened
+his black bag, drew forth a document from it, and spread it out.
+Then he dipped a pen into an inkstand, and said:</p>
+<p>"We now await the signing of the contract of marriage between
+Signor Alessandro Arturo Rodicaso, gentleman, and Signorina Giulia
+Innocenza Fidelia Corpetto, only daughter of Signor Francesco
+Corpetto, merchant."</p>
+<p>In the absence of any definite information on the Venetian
+formula adopted in such cases, the author had selected this style
+of announcement as being sufficiently stiff and imposing.</p>
+<p>Signor Rodicaso sprang forward with joyful alacrity to sign the
+contract, dashing off his name in two strokes, as is the invariable
+custom on the stage.</p>
+<p>The climax of the drama had now arrived, and everybody stood
+aside for the wretched Fidelia. Mrs. Slapman proved equal to the
+great occasion. Directing one look to heaven, as if for strength,
+and pressing a hand over the jewelled bodice which covered her
+bursting heart, she walked with firm steps toward the fatal table.
+Never in her life had she been more grandly simple. It was
+sublime!</p>
+<p>As Fidelia came up to the little table, she faltered, and leaned
+upon it to support herself; then, with a nervous motion, grasped
+the pen. Several times she dipped the pen in the empty inkstand,
+and each time her face assumed a look of more settled anguish.
+Then, bracing all her nerves for the decisive act of woman's life,
+she put down the pen boldly on the paper, and made one up stroke.
+Before she could make the other down stroke which was necessary to
+complete her signature, a wild figure, with hair dishevelled, and
+other evidences of hasty purpose, burst upon the stage.</p>
+<p>Fidelia paused; all stood back; and gentlemen who had swords
+laid hands on them.</p>
+<p>"Who is this?" asked the Father, with mercantile calmness.</p>
+<p>"Who dares thus break in upon my happiness?" inquired Signor
+Rodicaso.</p>
+<p>"Know you not, young man, that you are committing a breach of
+the peace?" remarked the notary, regarding the intrusion with the
+eye of a lawyer.</p>
+<p>The wild figure answered them all at once: "I am Alberto, and I
+come to rend this impious contract--thus--thus--thus!" (snatching
+the parchment from the table, tearing it to pieces, and trampling
+on it).</p>
+<p>Fidelia, astonished at the turn events were taking, leaned back
+in her chair, and looked on silently. Her time for fainting had not
+yet come.</p>
+<p>"Draw and defend yourself, caitiff!" exclaimed Signor Rodicaso,
+brandishing his sword.</p>
+<p>"Anywhere but in the presence of a lady," was the sarcastic
+reply. "Besides, I have claims on you, which, perhaps may teach you
+to respect me."</p>
+<p>"Claims! Thou liest! What claims?"</p>
+<p>"These! Hast seen them before? Ha! ha!" shouted Alberto, shaking
+a bundle of papers in the face of his rival.</p>
+<p>"Allow me to examine them, if you please?" asked Signor
+Rodicaso, with forced calmness.</p>
+<p>"No, you don't," was the response. "But I'll tell you what they
+are. They are judgments to the extent of one hundred and seventy
+thousand florins--dost hear? one hundred and seventy thousand
+florins--against you, which I have bought for less than quarter
+price from Jinkerini Bros, No. 124 Rialto. With them I offset the
+sum which this unhappy but excellent merchant" (pointing to the
+father) "owes you. Here, sir; now you are released from yon
+monster's clutches." (Hands package of judgments to the father,
+who, overpowered by the scene, takes and holds them in dumb
+amazement.)</p>
+<p>An expression of silent joy begins to steal over the face of
+Fidelia. But her time for fainting had not yet come!</p>
+<p>"Boy!" said Signor Rodicaso, with a composure that was perfectly
+wonderful, "there is another hand than thine in all this work. Thou
+art but the poor tool and I despise thee!"</p>
+<p>"Here is the hand!" exclaimed the uncle Bignolio, drawing out
+his leg from its seclusion, and bringing his whole body into full
+view. "Dost know it?" He held up his right hand, to carry out the
+idea of the author.</p>
+<p>"It is the hand of Bignolio the usurer," said Signor Rodicaso,
+despondingly, seeing now that the game was clearly against him.</p>
+<p>"Bignolio the usurer!" exclaimed the father, still wrapped in
+amazement.</p>
+<p>"Bignolio the usurer!" murmured Fidelia, whose woman's wit
+divined the mystery of his appearance. But her time to faint had
+not <i>yet</i> come.</p>
+<p>"Bignolio the usurer!" cried the notary, witnesses, and Bidette
+in chorus.</p>
+<p>"Yes," returned that gentleman; "Bignolio the <i>usurer,</i> who
+now is proud to claim the dearer title of 'own uncle' to his nephew
+Alberto. That nephew he this day receives into his partnership, and
+proclaims his only heir. Come to my arms, adopted son!"</p>
+<p>Alberto flew to his uncle, and was silently embraced. Even at
+this moment, sacred to the interchange of the noblest affections,
+several persons in the audience distinctly saw the uncle's left eye
+wink over Alberto's shoulder to Bidette, who responded to the
+unwelcome familiarity, this time, with an indignant frown.</p>
+<p>The nephew gently uncoiled his uncle, and addressed himself to
+the father:</p>
+<p>"Respected sir, I have long loved your daughter, and am not
+totally unprepared to believe that she may, in some slight measure,
+reciprocate my affections. I humbly solicit her hand in
+marriage."</p>
+<p>The father, with the characteristic decision of an old man of
+business, had already made up his mind. Alberto, the young partner
+and heir of the rich usurer of Venice, would be a more manageable
+son-in-law than the middle-aged though wealthy Rodicaso. The father
+said words to this effect in an "aside," and then replied
+aloud:</p>
+<p>"Her hand is yours; and may your union be crowned with felicity.
+Come, children, and receive a parent's blessing."</p>
+<p>"My bitter curse be on you all! Boy, we shall meet again!"
+shouted Rodicaso, striding off the stage, and followed by the
+notary for his pay, and by the laughter and scorn of the rest of
+the company.</p>
+<p>Fidelia's little cup of earthly happiness was now full. Her time
+for fainting had arrived at last. Everybody moved to clear a space
+for her. She rose, and walked with an unfaltering step toward
+Alberto. There was no overdone rapture in her gait; no exaggerated
+ecstasy in her face. As a practised critic remarked, "her calmness
+was the truest expression of her agony of joy."</p>
+<p>Alberto advanced halfway with a lover's ardor, and extended his
+arms. Then was her time to faint; and she fainted with a slight
+scream, sinking gently upon a faithful breast.</p>
+<p>The father raised his hands above the couple, and blessed them
+in the correct way, never seen off the stage. Uncle Bignolio wiped
+his eyes, and murmured, "Dear boy! How much he looks like his
+father now!"--a remark somewhat out of place, considering that
+Alberto's back was turned to the uncle. Bidette hovered near the
+happy group, and danced for joy.</p>
+<p>It was a touching tableau, and the spectators applauded it In a
+way that tickled the heart of the author, who was watching the
+effect through an eyehole of the left wing.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="H_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>HOW THE PLAY ENDED.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Just as the curtain was to be rung down on the end of the play,
+a mad clatter of boots was heard behind the scenes. Then a man,
+dressed in complete black, and excessively pale, jumped upon the
+stage. His black hair was tossed all over his head, and his black
+eyes were rolling wildly. Thus much all the spectators saw at a
+glance.</p>
+<p>The strange man's first intention appeared to be to dash at the
+happy couple; but, if so, he checked himself, and, standing at a
+distance of four feet from them, uttered these words: "Scoundrel!
+what are you doing with my wife there?" The man's whole figure
+could be seen to tremble.</p>
+<p>Many of the spectators, supposing this was a part of the
+play--though they did not see its precise connection with the
+plot--applauded what was apparently a fine piece of acting.</p>
+<p>"Good!" "Capital!" "Bravo!" were heard from all parts of the
+room, mingled with stamping and clapping.</p>
+<p>The man darted looks of concentrated hate at the audience.</p>
+<p>"Who is he?" "How well he does it!" "What splendid tragedy
+powers!" were some of the audible remarks that this called
+forth.</p>
+<p>It was also observed that a wonderfully natural style of acting
+was instantly developed among the other <i>dramatis personae</i>.
+Fidelia sprang from the arms of Alberto, and put on a lifelike
+expression of insulted dignity, mingled with astonishment. Alberto
+took a step away from the ghastly intruder, and was evidently at a
+loss what to do. His face was eloquent with bewilderment and
+mortification. The father looked confused and sheepish, and put his
+hands into his pockets. Bidette screamed a little, and fled to the
+opposite scenes. Uncle Bignolio whistled and smiled, and was
+evidently amused at the occurrence.</p>
+<p>All this, done in five seconds, so delighted the spectators,
+that they cheered, and cheered again. "As good as a theatre!"
+ejaculated a new friend of Mrs. Slapman's, on the front row.</p>
+<p>The strange, disorderly man plunged forward with one leg toward
+Alberto, and then drew himself back suddenly, as if in a state of
+harassing indecision. (Applause.) Then he cast a diabolical look
+(worthy of the elder Booth in Richard III) at the young lover, and
+shrieked, "Wretch! villain! I will--I will--" He hesitated to add
+what he would do, but shook his fists in a highly natural manner at
+the object of his hate. (Great applause.)</p>
+<p>"Sir!" said Fidelia, stretching her proud young form erect, like
+a tragedy queen, "How dare you, sir!" (Boisterous applause, and
+this remark from an elderly gentleman: "The picture of Mrs.
+Siddons!")</p>
+<p>The singular individual in black was seen to tremble with
+increased violence. His eyes rolled more wildly, while his face
+took on a chalkier hue. He stepped back, as if to insure his
+retreat. Then, mustering all his resolution, he said:</p>
+<p>"M-Mrs. M-Mrs. Slapman, you--you ought to be a-ashamed of
+yourself!"</p>
+<p>The real character of the strange actor was now made evident,
+and the whole house was hushed in awe and expectation. There was
+not a man or woman present but knew too well the folly of mingling
+in a family quarrel. So they held their tongues, and enjoyed the
+scene.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Slapman turned to the audience. She was pale, but perfectly
+composed. She said:</p>
+<p>"Ladies and gentlemen, this is my husband, a very quiet and
+well-behaved man, whose only fault is excessive nervousness. This
+fault, I am sorry to say, he encourages, by constantly smoking
+cigars and drinking strong black tea. He has been indulging in both
+of these stimulants to-night, till he is quite beside himself. I
+trust you will excuse and pity him. He has no other vices that I
+know of."</p>
+<p>Then, turning to her husband, whose hands had now dropped
+listlessly by his side, she added:</p>
+<p>"My dear, bathe your head, and go to bed immediately."</p>
+<p>He struggled to say something in the presence of this calm
+embodiment of satire, but could not. Hanging down his head, and
+looking very silly, he slinked off the stage.</p>
+<p>"Now, ladies and gentlemen," said Mrs. Slapman, "after an
+interval of fifteen minutes, we will proceed with the comedietta of
+'A Morning Call,' as if nothing had happened."</p>
+<p>When she had said this, Mrs. Slapman fainted--this time in
+earnest. She was caught in the arms of Fayette Overtop, who
+immediately, and with the utmost delicacy, resigned her to the arms
+of Miss Wick (Bidette), and of several other ladies, who came upon
+the stage and proffered salts, cologne, and other restoratives.</p>
+<p>The gentlemen present, actors and audience, unanimously decided
+that the best thing for them to do, under all the circumstances,
+was to leave the premises.</p>
+<p>This they did as soon as they could, reserving all discussion of
+the painful event of the evening for the free air of the
+street.</p>
+<p>As Overtop, very serious, and Maltboy, very jovial, were about
+to descend the steps to the sidewalk, they were met by a messenger,
+who desired them to go with him immediately to the station house to
+see some friends (names forgotten) who had been arrested, and had
+sent for them.</p>
+<p>Thither they went, and experienced the greatest surprise of the
+evening.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_NINTH."></a>BOOK NINTH.</h2>
+<h3>THE INQUEST.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="I_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>CORONER AND JURY.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The post-mortem examination had been held; and three doctors had
+sworn that deceased came to his death from a great variety of Greek
+and Latin troubles, all caused by a learned something which
+signified, in plain English, a blow on the head. Coroner Bullfast
+was so struck with the clear and explicit nature of the medical
+evidence, that he had it reduced to writing for his private
+regalement.</p>
+<p>The post-mortem examination, and the testimony of the three
+doctors, and of all the people in the house (except Patty Minford,
+daughter of the deceased)--whose joint knowledge upon the subject
+amounted to nothing more than hearing somebody with heavy boots
+come down stairs about midnight--occupied the whole of the first
+day. Patty, or Pet, was so thoroughly unnerved by the events of
+that horrible night, that the coroner found it impossible to take
+her evidence on that day. She had fainted twice before she could
+make Coroner Bullfast clearly understand that Marcus Wilkeson, her
+benefactor, and her father's best friend, was THE MURDERER. Having
+learned thus much, the coroner had put the police on the track of
+Marcus Wilkeson, and had postponed the further examination of the
+chief witness.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull, on learning of the tragic affair, had gone in person
+to the house of death, and taken Patty to her own home.</p>
+<p>The remains of the unfortunate inventor had been removed to the
+nearest undertaker's for interment, at the expense of Mrs. Crull.
+The apartments had been diligently searched, and the personal
+effects of the deceased examined, under the direction of the
+coroner. A number of documents had been discovered, which, in the
+coroner's opinion, threw a flood of light on the motives that led
+to the crime. A few dollars and a bull's-eye silver watch, found on
+the dead body, precluded the idea that the murder was done for
+plunder. With that quickness of perception for which Coroner
+Bullfast, like most of his official kind, was celebrated, he had
+formed his theory of the murder, and tremendously strong must be
+the future testimony that could shake it.</p>
+<p>On the morning of the second day, Coroner Bullfast and the jury
+reassembled, about ten o'clock, in the room where the murder was
+committed.</p>
+<p>The coroner was a jovial man, with a bulging forehead, a ruddy
+nose, a large diamond breastpin (a real diamond, of that
+superlative style only seen in its perfection on the shirt fronts
+of aldermen, contractors, and Washington Market butchers), and the
+native New York manner of speaking, which is sharp and mandatory.
+The coroner began life as a stone mason, gained early distinction
+as a fireman, controlled several hundred votes in his ward, became
+a member of a political committee, and got a coronership as his
+share of the spoils. He had aspired to be a police justice, or city
+inspector, or commissioner of the Croton Board. To either of these
+positions, or, for that matter, to any position indefinitely
+higher, he felt himself perfectly equal. But other members of the
+committee (which was a kind of joint-stock company for the
+distribution of offices) had prior and stronger claims than Harry
+Bullfast, and so he was put off with a coronership. He felt the
+slight acutely, but, like a prudent man, determined to so keep
+himself before the public in his performance of the office, as to
+make it a stepping stone to something much higher--the city
+comptrollership, or a seat in the State Senate, or in Congress, or
+(who could tell?) the governorship of the commonwealth--that grand
+possibility which every ward politician carries in his hat.</p>
+<p>The coroner was seated in the inventor's private armchair, with
+one leg thrown over the side of it, and the other stretched on the
+floor. He was chewing tobacco with manly vigor, and cracking jokes
+with a facetious juryman, who was assistant foreman of the Bully
+Boy Hose, of which the coroner was an exempt and honorary
+member.</p>
+<p>The jury was composed of six men whom the coroner had picked
+from the large number of idle spectators found by him at the scene
+of the murder when he was first summoned. Two of them chanced to be
+acquaintances of his. As to the rest, the coroner had not the
+remotest idea. They might have been beggars or pickpockets, for
+aught that he cared. They looked stupid, and he liked stupid
+jurors.</p>
+<p>"Them sharp fellers that thinks they knows more'n the cor'ner,
+is a cussed nuisance," he often had occasion to remark.</p>
+<p>The jury sat near one of the windows, in a semicircle of chairs
+which had been borrowed from the first and second floors. Pending
+the resumption of their melancholy work, such of them as could read
+were reading newspapers containing reports of the first day's
+proceedings, from two to ten columns long, wherein the scene of the
+"Mysterious Midnight Tragedy," as one paper called it, was
+represented in the most ingenious manner by printers' rules cut to
+show the dimensions of the rooms on the third floor, the position
+of the fireplace, bed, washstand, chest of drawers, unknown machine
+in the corner, and other things which had no bearing whatever on
+the affair. The other jurors, who could not read at all, or had an
+insuperable aversion to that laborious occupation, were rolling
+their quids in silence, and looking wise.</p>
+<p>At a long table in the centre of the room were seated several
+young gentlemen, dressed with singular independence of style. From
+one point of view they looked like actors, bearing about them signs
+of fatigue, as if from heavy night work. Observed again, they
+resembled young lawyers of indolent habits and scanty practice, who
+had just dropped in to watch the case.</p>
+<p>From their conversation, no clue to their professional identity
+could be gathered. They were cracking jokes, propounding
+conundrums, and telling stories humorously broad to each other.
+Everything was to them a legitimate amusement. The proceedings of
+the day before were peculiarly rich in funny reminiscences; and one
+tall, bright, curly-haired fellow was evoking roars of suppressed
+laughter by his capital mimicry of two of the dullest witnesses.
+Another was drawing comic profiles of a sleepy juryman on a scrap
+of paper. He had previously dashed off a very happy sketch of the
+coroner, and shown it to that functionary, who had "haw-hawed," and
+pronounced it "devilish good," and, in turn, presented the young
+artist with a fine Havana cigar, which he playfully put in his
+mouth and chewed the end of. Yet there were, about these young
+gentlemen, signs of business, which an intelligent observer might
+have easily interpreted. From the outside breast pockets of each of
+them protruded a number of pencils; and, from their lower side
+pockets, thick memorandum books with gray covers, or stiffly folded
+quires of foolscap.</p>
+<p>They were the reporters of the press--the gamins and good
+fellows of literature;--fellows of inexhaustible resources, who
+carry their wits literally at their fingers' ends;--who can do more
+than extract sunbeams from cucumbers; for they can make up
+thrilling facts out of nothing;--who can thread their way through a
+crowd where a tapeworm would be squeezed to death;--whose writing
+desk is usually another man's back; and who sketch out a much
+better speech between an orator's shoulder blades than he is making
+in front;--whose written language is a perplexity compared with
+which Greek is a relaxation and Sanscrit a positive amusement;--who
+deal in adjectives, and know their precise value, and how to
+administer them, as an apothecary knows the drugs that are boxed
+and bottled on his shelves;--who are less men than parts of an
+enormous mill grinding out grist to be branned and bolted in the
+editorial rooms, made into food in the printing office and press
+vault, and served up hot for the public's breakfast next
+morning.</p>
+<p>Clever, witty, insatiable fellows they, for whom a planet ought
+to be set apart, where all the murders are wrapped in impenetrable
+mystery, and the smallest railroad accidents are frightful
+catastrophes.</p>
+<p>The east side of the room, where the dead body had been found,
+was preserved inviolate from the broom, mop, and other touch, until
+the inquest was over. The strange machine stood in its accustomed
+place, flanked by the screen. It had been extensively handled and
+looked at, and passed for a new kind of clock. Two large weights
+(which had fallen to the floor) and the interplaying cogwheels gave
+force to that conjecture.</p>
+<p>A large purple spot on the floor showed where the old man's life
+had ebbed away. Close by this spot, precisely where it had been
+picked up, lay the long oaken club with the iron tip, which, it was
+supposed, had done the dreadful deed. There were small splashes and
+spots on it too.</p>
+<p>The fun of the reporters, the chat of the coroner and his
+friends, the readings and airy meditations of the jurors, were all
+suddenly checked by the appearance of Marcus Wilkeson, escorted by
+two police officers, and Messrs. Overtop and Maltboy, Patching and
+Tiffles. All five had passed the night in the station
+house--Messrs. Patching and Tiffles from compulsion, as witnesses,
+and possible accomplices, and Overtop and Maltboy as guides,
+philosophers, and friends. All looked seedy and criminal, as if
+there were something in the atmosphere of station houses to give a
+man the semblance of a vagabond and an outcast. Marcus Wilkeson was
+very pale, and, when he looked across the room, as he did upon his
+entrance, by a singular impulse, and saw the great blood mark and
+the club on the floor, he trembled with emotion.</p>
+<p>The keen eyes of the coroner caught these signs, and he
+immediately brought in a mental verdict of "guilty." Some of the
+jury observed the same signs, and thought them suspicious. The
+reporters looked upon Marcus Wilkeson without emotion or
+prejudgment. They were so accustomed to seeing murderers, that they
+regarded them simply as a part of the business community--a little
+vicious, perhaps, but not so much worse than other people, after
+all. One reporter, attached to an illustrated paper, dashed off the
+profile of Marcus Wilkeson, under the cover of his hat, and caught
+the dejected expression of his face to a nicety.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="I_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>STATEMENT OF THE PRISONER.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The coroner received Marcus with that air of consideration which
+magistrates instinctively bestow upon persons charged with great
+crimes, and informed him, with some respect, that he was brought
+there to make any explanation that he saw fit, touching his
+connection with "this 'ere murder."</p>
+<p>The party were then accommodated with seats near the jury, and
+facing the reporters. As Marcus looked up, and saw those practised
+scribes sharpening their pencils, his heart sank deeper within him.
+The vision which had troubled him all night, of a broadside
+notoriety in all the city papers, rose before his mind, clothed
+with fresh horror. The dull sound of sharpening those pencils was
+like the whetting of the executioner's knife.</p>
+<p>The proper course was to have accepted an unsworn statement from
+the prisoner; but the coroner always administered oaths when
+prisoners were willing to take them. The repetition of that jargon
+with a profane conclusion (for so it seemed, in the slipshod way
+that it was said), which the coroner called an oath, was a positive
+pleasure to that official. As Marcus desired to take the oath, the
+coroner rattled off the unintelligible something, and handed him a
+Bible, which the prisoner pressed reverentially to his lips.
+Marcus, being now supposed to be sworn, proceeded, with what
+firmness he could muster, to answer the numerous interrogatories of
+the coroner. That official chewed hard, and, as it were, spit out
+his questions.</p>
+<p>His testimony, in substance, was this:</p>
+<p>That he was a friend of the deceased, and had loaned him one
+thousand dollars to complete a machine upon which he was
+engaged--pointing to the unfinished pile in the corner. That his
+relations with the deceased and his family (Marcus did not like to
+mention Pet's name) were entirely agreeable, until an anonymous
+letter, charging him with improper motives in visiting the house,
+had poisoned the mind of the deceased against him. [The giving up
+of this letter to the coroner, who read it to the jury, and then
+tossed it over to the reporters for copying, was a hard trial, but
+Marcus had resolved upon meeting all the troubles of the case
+halfway.]</p>
+<p>The coroner here produced the second anonymous letter, which had
+been found on the person of the deceased, showed it to Marcus for
+identification, and then threw it to the reporters, as one would
+throw a choice bone to a cage full of hungry animals.</p>
+<p>Marcus explained that he had made every effort to discover the
+authorship of the letters, without success; whereupon the coroner
+shut his eyes knowingly, rolled his quid from right to left, and
+said that he was "investigatin' 'em" himself.</p>
+<p>QUESTION BY A JUROR. "Wos the letters postpaid?"</p>
+<p>ANSWER. "They were."</p>
+<p>The juror took the reply into his profoundest consideration.</p>
+<p>Marcus, resuming, stated that, on his last visit--the night of
+the supposed murder--he had found Mr. Minford very much disturbed
+in mind by the unjust suspicions aroused by these letters. He had
+accused witness of the vile intentions referred to in them. Witness
+had denied the imputations with emphasis. The discussion was
+becoming quite warm, when the daughter of the deceased entered the
+room, and, being worn out with watching by the side of a sick
+friend, retired to bed in the adjoining chamber. The conversation,
+broken off by her entrance, was then continued, much in the same
+vein. Mr. Minford was in a distressing state of nervous excitement
+that evening, and talked loud and wild. Witness made an effort to
+keep his temper, and did so, though the peculiar injustice of the
+accusations were enough to arouse any man's anger. He reserved his
+show of wrath for the author of the anonymous letters, if he could
+ever catch him. He would not say that he had not replied to the
+deceased with some warmth of manner. But as to threatening him, or
+hurting one hair of his head, witness had not done it--so help him
+God!</p>
+<p>QUESTION BY A JUROR. "Was the key of the door in the keyhole
+that night?"</p>
+<p>ANSWER. "I don't know."</p>
+<p>COMMENT BY FACETIOUS JUROR. "Be me sowl, I thinks that whishkay
+had more to do with it than the doorkay. Don't you, Harry?"</p>
+<p>CORONER. "Bully for you!"</p>
+<p>Clothing himself again with dignity, the coroner asked:</p>
+<p>"Der yer mean to say, Mr. Wilkingson, that yer didn't kill this
+man? Remember, now, yer on yer oath!"</p>
+<p>The horrible bluntness of the question nearly felled Marcus to
+the floor. He placed his hand on his brow, now pale with the
+acutest anguish. Then he rose, and, looking upward said:</p>
+<p>"As God is my judge, and as I hope for heaven, I am innocent of
+this murder, or of any part in it."</p>
+<p>"If you please, Mr. Coroner, this gentleman and myself are
+counsel for the accused," said Overtop.</p>
+<p>"Oh! you're his counsel. Then the other two are the chaps
+arrested as 'complices?"</p>
+<p>Patching writhed at this. Nor were his feelings relieved by
+observing, with an oblique glance, that the artist of the
+illustrated paper was in the act of taking him.</p>
+<p>"I protest," said Wesley Tiffles, rising to his full height, and
+throwing out both arms for a comprehensive gesture, "I protest
+against this arrest and detention as illegal. If the coroner will
+give me but a short hour of his valuable time, I can--"</p>
+<p>CORONER <i>(puffing up</i>). "The gentleman will be good enough
+to shut up for the present. When we are ready, we will hear what he
+has to say."</p>
+<p>TIFFLES. "I protest, sir. I wish the gentlemanly and intelligent
+reporters to note that I protest--"</p>
+<p>CORONER. "Are you, or me, boss here, hey?"</p>
+<p>TIFFLES. "Oh! you, of course, sir." The protestant then sank
+into his seat, not wholly disappointed, for he had gained his
+object of making a little newspaper capital by tickling the
+reporters. He had also remarked, with pleasure, that, while he
+stood erect, with both arms outstretched, the artist had secured
+his full length. Tiffles was fond of notoriety, however achieved;
+and he saw a good opening for it in this case.</p>
+<p>Overtop here suggested that it would be easy to prove their
+client's innocence. He would respectfully request his Honor to
+procure the testimony of Miss Patty Minford, if she could be found.
+As she went to bed in the adjoining room early that evening, she
+must have heard some noise in connection with the murder--if,
+indeed, a murder had been committed. Overtop's legal education
+taught him to doubt everything.</p>
+<p>Coroner Bullfast was touched with the title of Honor, so
+skilfully applied by Overtop; and he answered, with uncommon
+sweetness:</p>
+<p>"I am expecting Miss Minford every minute, sir. She will speak
+for herself. For the present, sir, I am sorry to say that it was on
+her testimony alone that Mr. Wilkingson was 'rested."</p>
+<p>A look of new surprise and horror passed over the pale face of
+Marcus, and Overtop and Maltboy exchanged glances of
+astonishment.</p>
+<p>"Now, Mr. Wilkingson," continued the coroner, taking a fresh
+chew, "please drive ahead with yer statement--if yer choose to. Yer
+not bound to say anythink, yer know."</p>
+<p>AN INTELLIGENT JUROR. "Will Mr. Wilkeson tell us about what time
+he left this house that night, and where he went?"</p>
+<p>Marcus raised his sunken head, and shook it, as if to dispel a
+stupefaction. Then, in a faint and trembling voice, he replied that
+he looked at his watch just before bidding Mr. Minford
+"good-night," and-observed that it was fifteen minutes past eleven
+o'clock.</p>
+<p>QUESTION BY A JUROR. "What kind o' watch do you carry?"</p>
+<p>ANSWER (<i>exhibiting the watch</i>). "An English hunter---
+lever escapement--- full jewelled."</p>
+<p>At any other time, Marcus would have smiled at the impertinence
+of the question, but he answered it gravely.</p>
+<p>He then went on to say, that Mr. Minford had not replied to his
+"good-night." That he repeated the salutation, and extended his
+hand as a token of unbroken friendship. That Mr. Minford refused to
+take it, and said that he had one last favor to ask of him
+(Marcus), and that was, never to cross his threshold again. That he
+(Marcus) responded, "I forgive you, sir. When, on reflection, you
+think that you have done me injustice--as you will, at last--send
+for me, and I will still be your friend." That he received no
+answer to this, save a shake of the head, and immediately went down
+stairs into the street. He was feverish, and his brain was in a
+whirl. Hardly knowing what he did, he walked the streets hither and
+thither. He could not tell what streets he traversed, but he kept
+up the exercise till he was tired. Then he became calmer, returned
+home, entered the house with a latch key, and went to bed without
+waking any of the inmates. On going to bed, he observed that his
+watch marked one o'clock.</p>
+<p>An intelligent juror. "You must have passed a large number of
+people in the streets between eleven and one o'clock. Did you see
+no one whom you knew?"</p>
+<p>"No one; but at a corner some distance from here,--I could not
+say what corner,--I noticed a policeman sitting on a barrel in
+front of a grocery, smoking. He was a short, fat man, and his legs
+hardly reached to the pavement. I remember him the more
+particularly, because I stopped and lighted a cigar at his pipe.
+Just at that moment, the City Hall bell commenced striking a fire
+alarm."</p>
+<p>"What was the district?" asked the juror who was assistant
+foreman of the Bully Boy Hose.</p>
+<p>"The Seventh. I counted the strokes. I walked on rapidly, and
+soon came up with another policeman, who was leaning against a
+grocery store. I said to him, 'A cold night, Mr. Policeman,' and I
+think he would remember that circumstance, if he could be found.
+Just after I had passed him, the alarm bells struck the last round.
+Three or four rounds had been struck."</p>
+<p>The assistant foreman of the Bully Boy Hose, having referred to
+a memorandum book which he drew from a breast pocket, here
+exclaimed:</p>
+<p>"The alarm was at twenty-five minutes of twelve. Nothing but a
+chimney in Whitehall street. We run into Twenty's fellers, comin'
+back, and had a nice little row. Ever belong to the department,
+sir?"</p>
+<p>Marcus answered "No;" and the pyrophilist looked compassionately
+upon him, as upon one who had never known true happiness.</p>
+<p>"If you never run with the mersheen," observed the coroner, "you
+do' 'no' wot life is. As for me, sir, it's my boast and pride that
+I have been a member of the New York Fire Department for more'n
+twenty years. It wos the backin' of the boys that made me a
+coroner; and, thank God! I'm never ashamed to tell 'em so."</p>
+<p>The coroner spoke truly. So far from being ashamed to "tell 'em
+so," he was always "telling 'em so," never missing an opportunity,
+at political meetings, to inform the firemen that he was "one of
+'em," and that no mark of honor, even from the President of the
+United States, was equal to his fireman's badge. The continual
+"telling of 'em so" had aided in procuring for him his present
+official distinction, and was destined to earn higher honors for
+him at a future day.</p>
+<p>The coroner tore off a fresh chew from a half hand of Cavendish
+which had been well gnawed at all the edges, and told Marcus that
+he might "fire away" again.</p>
+<p>Marcus then proceeded to state that, on the morning after the
+eventful night, he woke up early. His dreams had been horrible, and
+his waking reflections were no less distressing. The thought that
+Mr. Minford should have suspected him, thus unjustly, of the basest
+of crimes, and that they, who had been such good friends, should
+have parted in a way that effectually cut off reconciliation; and
+the other thought, that this mischief had been wrought by some
+unscrupulous enemy, when he had always fondly believed that he
+never could have a foe in the world--these thoughts, occurring with
+great force to a nervous and sensitive man, nearly maddened him. He
+felt that if he remained in the house that day, as usual, and
+brooded over his troubles, he would grow crazy. While he was
+pondering what to do, his eyes chanced to fall on an invitation
+which he had received from Mr. Wesley Tiffles, to meet him at the
+Cortlandt street ferry at seven and a quarter o'clock that morning,
+and accompany him and his panorama of Africa to New Jersey. The day
+before, when this invitation came to hand, he had determined not to
+accept it; but it now seemed to offer him a capital chance to see
+some excitement and ran. As these remedies were precisely what his
+mental malady required, he jumped to dress himself, and hurried out
+of the house, seeing nobody as he made his exit, and leaving no
+word of explanation. He took no luggage, except a clean collar, as
+he intended to return the following day. He was even so careless
+and forgetful as to leave his purse behind him, and found, on
+reaching the ferry, that he had barely two dollars in his
+pocket.</p>
+<p>Question by a juror. "Wos they bank bills; and, if so, what bank
+wos they on?"</p>
+<p>Marcus answered the question to the best of his knowledge, and
+the juror sagely nodded, and took the reply under treatment.</p>
+<p>"I say, Tubbs," cried the coroner, "wot's the use of askin' them
+kind o' questions?"</p>
+<p>Tubbs looked up from his ruminations, somewhat confused. The
+politic Overtop--that model of a rising lawyer--here put in a word
+for Tubbs, and said that the question, in his opinion, was a very
+pertinent one, for it went to test the memory of his client. If Mr.
+Wilkeson had just committed murder, he would hardly be in that calm
+frame of mind which is necessary to the recollection of small
+facts. He hoped that the ingenious gentleman would ask many more
+such questions. By these judicious remarks, Overtop gained one fast
+friend for his client on the jury.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="I_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>JUSTICE GOES TO DINNER.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Wesley Tiffles was then examined. He commenced with an eloquent
+dissertation on the rights of man, and his own rights in
+particular, but stopped when he saw that the reporters tucked their
+pencils behind their ears, and waited for facts. The moment he
+began to talk facts--which are to reporters what corn is to
+crows--down came the pencils from their perches again, and went
+tripping over the paper.</p>
+<p>Mr. Tiffles's testimony would have consumed two hours, or two
+days, perhaps, if he had been allowed to go on unchecked. But the
+coroner had been invited to dine at a Broadway restaurant, with a
+few political friends, at three P.M. So he concluded, after Tiffles
+had talked five minutes, that he knew nothing about the murder, and
+could throw no light on it, and told Tiffles that he was not wanted
+further.</p>
+<p>"And you mean to tell me, sir, that I am not to be locked up in
+the station house to-night," said Tiffles.</p>
+<p>"No, unless yer want ter be."</p>
+<p>"Of course not--of course not." But the interior Tiffles was
+disappointed at this sudden and unromantic termination of his case.
+A few more nights in the station house, or in the Tombs, would have
+given him capital material for a book, of which he had already
+projected the first chapter. He sat down, and execrated his ill
+luck.</p>
+<p>Patching, the artist, was then interrogated, to the extent of
+two minutes, and corroborated Tiffles's testimony as to the sad and
+strange appearance of Mr. Wilkeson on the day after the supposed
+murder. Patching was then informed by the coroner that his further
+attendance at the inquest would not be required.</p>
+<p>Patching, on rising, had assumed the attitude of Paul before
+Felix, as set forth in some ancient cartoon; and in that position
+of mingled innocence, dignity, and defiance, the artist of the
+illustrated paper got a spirited sketch of him. Had Patching
+dreamed how capitally his long hair, peaked beard, thin nose, and
+bony forehead would be taken off, in a rough but faithful character
+portrait, he would have sunk in confusion. Happily, the newspaper
+artist was sitting almost behind his more pretentious brother of
+the canvas, and the latter knew not what had been done, until, the
+following week, he saw a striking intensification of himself
+staring into the street from numerous bulletin boards and shop
+windows.</p>
+<p>Before sitting down, Mr. Patching begged to explain to the jury,
+and to the public through the reporters (who did not take down a
+word of the explanation), that he had painted the panorama of
+Africa to oblige his friend, "Wesley Tiffles. It was hardly
+necessary for him to say, in this community, that he was more at
+home among higher walks of Art.</p>
+<p>"Are you a sign painter, Mr. Patching?" asked the coroner. "No,
+sir; I am not," said Patching, with dignified contempt.</p>
+<p>"Perhaps you're a carriage painter, then? Them's the fellers for
+picturin'. The woman and flowers on the Bully Boys' hose carriage
+wos well done. Hey, Jack?"</p>
+<p>"That it wos, Harry," returned the assistant foreman of the
+Bully Boys. "If Patching can do that sort o' thing, he'll
+pass."</p>
+<p>Patching fixed looks of professional indignation on the coroner
+and the assistant foreman, and sat down gloomily, amid the
+suppressed laughter of the irreverent reporters.</p>
+<p>The coroner then looked at his watch, and, finding that the time
+was within half an hour of dinner, said that the inquest would be
+adjourned till the following morning, at ten o'clock.</p>
+<p>"But, your Honor," said Overtop, "--that is, if you will allow
+me to make the suggestion--couldn't you give us an hour longer?
+Nothing has yet been heard from Miss Minford, who, you said, was
+expected to be in attendance to-day. Will you be good enough to
+send to Mrs. Crull's house for her?"</p>
+<p>"Really, I can't wait," replied the coroner. "The young lady
+must be sick, or she would have been here before now."</p>
+<p>"But--pardon me, your Honor--we are anxious to have Miss Minford
+brought on the stand this afternoon, believing, that her testimony
+alone will acquit our client."</p>
+<p>"You believe so, because you do' 'no' what it is. But, as I said
+before, it wos on Miss Minford's statement that Mr. Wilkingson
+there was 'rested. And the best advice I can give him is to take a
+good night's rest, and get his nerves ready for the young woman's
+testimony to-morrow, for it'll be a staggerer." The coroner
+consulted his watch again, with evident impatience, and rose from
+his seat.</p>
+<p>Overtop essayed to speak again; but the coroner interrupted him
+with, "The inquest is 'journed till to-morrer, at ten o'clock. Mr.
+Policeman, you will take the prisoner back to the station
+house."</p>
+<p>This speech was torture to Overtop and Maltboy, who, believing
+firmly in their friend's innocence, were convinced that a full
+investigation of the case that day would procure his acquittal.
+They turned eyes of exhaustless friendship and sympathy toward
+him.</p>
+<p>Marcus was in that half-comatose state which is the stupid
+reaction from an intense and painful excitation of the nerves. He
+was morbidly calm. The opinion of the coroner, that Miss Minford's
+testimony would be a "staggerer," had no more effect on him than it
+would have had on the most phlegmatic reader of the case in next
+morning's paper.</p>
+<p>"Then, your Honor, we must ask you to take bail," said
+Overtop.</p>
+<p>"Can't take bail! Can't take anything but my dinner, to-day! For
+the third time, I say, the inquest is adjourned." The coroner
+hastily put on his spring overcoat.</p>
+<p>Overtop was tempted to make a fierce reply; but the legal
+discretion in which he was educated restrained him.</p>
+<p>The word had gone forth. The jurors rose, yawned, and grasped
+their hats. The reporters jammed their notes into their pockets,
+and precipitately fled from the room. The policeman escorted Marcus
+Wilkeson and his counsel, and Tiffles and Patching, to the carriage
+which brought them, and which still stood in front of the house, an
+object of tragic interest to a large crowd of men, women, and
+children, who had remained about the doorway during the inquest,
+and could not be dispersed by the policemen.</p>
+<p>"Which is he?" "Who's the murderer?" whispered twenty voices, as
+the party emerged from the stairs upon the sidewalk.</p>
+<p>"That's him! That chap with the big hat and long hair. You could
+pick him out of a million," said a shrewd observer.</p>
+<p>"What ugly eyes he's got! They're sharp enough to stab ye,"
+added a shop girl.</p>
+<p>"I seen some pirates hung, when I was a little gal," remarked an
+old woman, "and they were pooty compared to him."</p>
+<p>The object of these and other remarks was the unhappy Patching,
+who had not yet got over his wrath at the coroner, and was scowling
+and compressing his lips very like a murderer.</p>
+<p>The policeman and his companions, all but the spell-bound
+Marcus, could not help laughing at these ridiculous mistakes. But
+Patching turned upon the crowd, and delivered among them one
+withering look of scorn, which fully confirmed them in the belief
+that he was a murderer of the deepest dye. And when the carriage
+rolled away, it was followed by a volley of groans, mixed with a
+few pebbles, handfuls of mud, and other missiles which happened to
+be lying around loose.</p>
+<p>"Here, boys, don't act that way," said the coroner, who had just
+made his appearance on the sidewalk. "Let the poor devil go. It's a
+case of murder, clear, enough; and he won't slip through my hands
+easy, I can tell ye, if he <i>is</i> rich." The coroner spoke
+good-naturedly, for he saw several of his political adherents among
+the throng.</p>
+<p>"That's the talk!" "Good boy!" "You're the feller for us!" were
+some of the warm responses.</p>
+<p>The coroner smiled, as he stopped to light a cigar from the pipe
+of a dirty admirer, and then, bowing obsequiously to the group, he
+stalked off in a rowdy way in the direction of his expected
+dinner.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="I_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>LIGHT IN THE PRISON.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>On the return of the prisoner and friends to the station house,
+Marcus was gratified to find a number of old business acquaintances
+waiting for him in the ante-room. They were men whom he had known
+in his Wall-street epoch, and had always set down as good-enough
+friends in prosperity, but cold-shouldered creatures in an hour of
+trial. He was mistaken, as many men are mistaken, in judging the
+hearts of business men from their white and careworn faces. They
+came with warm hands, sympathetic words, and offers of bail money
+and other aid, if wanted. There were short notes from two or three
+other old fellows whom he had not seen for years, telling him that
+they were at his command.</p>
+<p>These expressions of good will touched Marcus to the heart. He
+learned that, in the self-conceit of his retired and studious life,
+he had done injustice to these citizens of the whirling world. With
+a thousand thanks for the kindness of his callers, he told them
+that their friendly services were not needed; that his innocence
+would surely be made to appear; and that, to the day of his death,
+he should never forget them. Upon this assurance, repeated two or
+three times, his business friends withdrew with characteristic
+business impetuosity, wishing him a speedy release from his
+disagreeable position--which is the roundabout phrase for
+prison.</p>
+<p>A policeman, who had charge of the station house during the
+absence of his superior officer, here informed Marcus that an old
+lady and a young one, an old gen'leman and a lad, had called. The
+old gen'leman and the lad would drop round again during the
+evening. The old lady and the young one were waiting for him in the
+captain's room.</p>
+<p>He entered the captain's room--his companions staying
+outside--and saw, as he expected, his half-sister Philomela, and a
+young woman dressed in the height of cheap fashion, who was no
+other than Mash, the cook.</p>
+<p>His sister rose, and extended her hand to him severely, and
+said, with a solemn voice:</p>
+<p>"Brother Marcus, I am sorry to see you here. I hope you are not
+guilty of this crime?"</p>
+<p>"Hope?" said Marcus, stung to the quick. "Why not say at once
+that I am guilty? It is strange that the only relative I have on
+earth should be the first to doubt my innocence."</p>
+<p>"Oh, no, Marcus! You do me injustice there. I do not for a
+moment doubt your innocence. But you know I always advised you to
+give up your moping habits at home, and go into active business,
+like other men of your age. If you had been in business now, you
+wouldn't have had time to get mixed up in the affairs of this old
+man Minford and his daughter, and would have escaped this disgrace.
+I trust, Marcus," she added, emphatically, "I trust this will be a
+lesson to you."</p>
+<p>Poor Mash, the cook, had been playing with her bonnet strings,
+and trying to check her tears. But the unnatural effort was too
+much for her, and she burst out crying.</p>
+<p>"Oh, Mr. Wilkeson!" she said, between her sobs, "I--I'm so sorry
+to see you here; b-but I--I know yer innocent. Boo-boo-hoo!"</p>
+<p>"Thank you, Mash," replied Marcus, quite affected at this sudden
+outbreak of sympathy. "<i>You</i> speak like a true woman. But
+don't cry any more, my good girl. I shall be released to-morrow."
+Marcus said this confidently--though he had not the least idea how
+his acquittal was to be obtained.</p>
+<p>"Oh! I hope so--I--hope so, Mr. Wilkeson. Boo-boo-hoo--I--I wish
+I could g-go to prison in your place. Boo-boo-hoo!"</p>
+<p>Mash had derived this preposterous idea of vicarious
+imprisonment from the story of "The Buttery and the Boudoir," which
+was now drawing near its conclusion, and gradually killing, or
+marrying off, its heroes and heroines.</p>
+<p>Marcus could not help smiling at the romantic notion. Miss
+Philomela laughed sarcastically, and exclaimed:</p>
+<p>"You must take pattern from me, girl, and control your feelings.
+My brother doesn't want crying women about him at this time."</p>
+<p>"Don't be too sure of that, sister. Tears come naturally from a
+woman. They are her best evidence of sympathy, and therefore
+precious to one who needs it."</p>
+<p>Mash, the cook, gave vent to a fresh shower of tears at this
+encouraging remark, and made Miss Philomela shrug her shoulders in
+disgust.</p>
+<p>"Oh! <i>don't</i> be silly. Mash!" said Miss Philomela, losing
+all patience with the cook.</p>
+<p>"I--I--boo-boo-hoo!--can't help it, marm."</p>
+<p>"Nonsense!" said the superior female. "As for you, Marcus, you
+should not encourage such folly, when you have troubles that demand
+our sober and earnest attention. With reference to the past, I
+might say a great many things, but I forbear. To be serious,
+now--for once in your life--what can I do for you?"</p>
+<p>"Will you do what I ask, faithfully?" asked Marcus.</p>
+<p>"Yes, faithfully. I promise."</p>
+<p>"Then, my sister, be so good as to go home immediately, and send
+me a spare shirt and a change of clothes. Mash can bring them. And,
+lest another interview should prove too severe a trial for your
+female sensibility, I beg that you will not come here again. If I
+want you very much, I can send for you."</p>
+<p>"You are very unkind--very unkind. But I will not make any
+remarks. You know that nothing would give me greater pleasure than
+to serve my brother. For, though you have faults--I suppose you
+will not deny that you have some little faults--you are still my
+brother."</p>
+<p>Marcus smiled, and thought how foolish it was to quarrel with
+the whimsical but not bad-hearted woman. "Well, sister Philomela,
+you can see for yourself that I am not ill used here. Comfortable
+bed, rousing fire, and warm meals from the restaurant round the
+corner! The lieutenant<a name="FNanchor1"></a><a href=
+"#Footnote_1">[1]</a> who is in command of this station house turns
+out to be an old friend of my boyhood, and treats me more like a
+guest than a prisoner. And I must say, that, but for the idea of a
+prison, I could live as pleasantly here as at home. Even you can do
+nothing to lighten my captivity. But I promise, that <i>if</i> I am
+held by this coroner's jury--which, of course, I shall not be--and
+am sent to the Tombs, then I will tax your sisterly affection to
+the utmost."</p>
+<blockquote><a name="Footnote_1"></a><a href="#FNanchor1">[1]</a>
+Called sergeant of police under the recent Metropolitan
+Act.</blockquote>
+<p>At the mention of that dreadful place, the "Tombs," Mash broke
+into sobs again. The touching experiences of Gerald Florville in
+that house of despair--as set forth in "The Buttery and the
+Boudoir"--were poignantly brought to her mind.</p>
+<p>Miss Philomela looked serious as the Tombs loomed up in her
+mind, and she would have said something condoling, but for the
+irritating conduct of the cook, who annoyed her so much that she
+decided to leave. She abruptly shook hands with her half-brother.
+"It is very easy," said she, "to point out how certain mistakes
+might have been avoided. But let the past go. If you are not
+acquitted to-morrow, I shall call here again, notwithstanding you
+don't seem very desirous to see me. Now, good-by. Come, hurry up,
+Mash!"</p>
+<p>Marcus shook hands with his half-sister, and also with Mash, who
+wept afresh.</p>
+<p>In the ante-room, Miss Philomela saw Overtop and Maltboy, upon
+whom she bestowed a half smile, and Tiffles, whom she treated to a
+cordial grimace, not unmingled with a blush. Tiffles, on his part,
+was profoundly polite, and inquired if she were going home.
+Learning that she was, he remarked that he had occasion to walk in
+the same direction, and accompanied her as she left the station
+house. Mash followed at a short distance behind, not because she
+did not think herself fully as good as Miss Philomela, but because
+she wished to indulge unchecked in the mild luxury of tears.</p>
+<p>A new visitor was now announced. He was a curly-headed, neatly
+dressed boy of nineteen years. His face was one that is handsomer
+in promise than in fact. Marcus recognized him as the boy Bog, whom
+he had not seen for several weeks. The boy had developed a
+remarkable talent for making money honestly. For two months he had
+attended a night school, and was fast correcting his awkward
+English, and attaining to other knowledge. Prosperity and schooling
+together had given him quite a polish. The rough boy was coming to
+be a presentable youth.</p>
+<p>He advanced timidly toward Marcus, who shook hands with him. He
+sat down before the fire, and commenced fumbling his cap in the old
+way. "With the exception of that trick, and his shyness, there was
+little of the original boy Bog about him,</p>
+<p>"Mr. Wilkeson," said he, giving his cap a twirl, "I am very
+sorry to see you here; because, I may say, I <i>know</i> you are
+innocent."</p>
+<p>The positive manner in which the boy asserted this, charmed
+Marcus, "I thank you, my dear Bog," said he; "but how do you know
+it? For, though I am innocent, I may have some trouble in proving
+it."</p>
+<p>The boy drew a small folded note from his pocket. "I'll explain,
+sir," said he.</p>
+<p>Marcus here called in his counsel, Messrs. Overtop and Maltboy,
+and his good friend the lieutenant of police, who had just arrived
+in the outer room, in order that they might hear the
+explanation.</p>
+<p>The boy was embarrassed by his audience; but the anxious look of
+Marcus, and a few kind words from the lieutenant of police,
+reassured him. Bog then proceeded to tell what he knew of the
+strange young man's acquaintance with Miss Patty Minford--which was
+very easily told, since it did not amount to much--and concluded by
+opening the letter given to him by the young man for delivery to
+Miss Minford, and handed it to Marcus.</p>
+<p>Marcus glanced at the writing, expecting that it would resemble
+that of the first anonymous letter addressed to Mr. Minford, which
+he drew from his pocket for comparison. But the writing was totally
+different in inclination, thickness of the downward stroke, and all
+other respects. He read it aloud, his counsel and the lieutenant of
+police listening attentively.</p>
+<p>"I don't know much about the case yet," said the lieutenant,
+"but, jumping at a conclusion, I should say that this sneaking chap
+was jealous of your intimacy with the Minford family; that he wrote
+the anonymous letters to the old man, in a different hand, and that
+he either committed the murder, or knows something about it. His
+motive for annoying Miss Minford I can understand--for this city is
+full of just such well dressed scoundrels; but the motive of the
+murder I can't comprehend. But mark me--- this fellow has some
+knowledge of it; and we must hunt him up. And, first, let us
+compare the letters."</p>
+<p>Marcus handed the two letters to the lieutenant, who, with
+Overtop and Maltboy, gave them a close examination. One was written
+on faint blue paper in a buff envelope; the other on white paper in
+a white envelope. Every curve, cross, and dot was minutely
+compared; but not the faintest resemblance between the two letters
+could be discovered. "No more like than chalk and cheese," said the
+lieutenant. "My theory is knocked on the head."</p>
+<p>"Let me examine the envelopes again," said Overtop. They had
+inspected them less carefully than the contents.</p>
+<p>As soon as Overtop had placed the two envelopes side by side,
+his eyes lighted up with the pleasure of a great discovery. "What
+fools we are!" he exclaimed. "There it is! Don't you see? Don't you
+see? A regular Hogarthian line of beauty under the name on
+each."</p>
+<p>All stared at the envelopes, and at once recognized the
+similarity between the graceful curved lines. They looked somewhat
+like the letter S laid on its side; and more like the arm of a
+rocking chair.</p>
+<p>Marcus had a sudden inward vision of the writer. One of those
+convictions which defy all logical analysis flashed upon his
+mind.</p>
+<p>"Do you know where this strange young man lives, Bog?" asked
+Marcus.</p>
+<p>"No, sir. I follered--I should say followed--him two or three
+times, because I thought he wasn't acting just right toward Miss
+Minford (here Bog blushed). He always went into drinking houses and
+billiard saloons, and once into a place where they say the worst
+kind o' gambling is allers--I mean always--going on. But he knew me
+by sight, and I was afraid he would ask me about that letter which
+I didn't deliver for him. So I had to follow him a good piece
+behind; and sometimes I lost track of him. Then, again, he would
+keep a tramping round from one drinking place to another--but never
+getting drunk that I could see--till twelve or one o'clock at
+night. By that time I felt I ought to go home, and so I never
+tracked him to his lodgings, if he has any. But it's my belief he
+travels in the night, and sleeps in the daytime, like the
+cats."</p>
+<p>"Good, so far," said Marcus. "You have already given us a
+general description of this fellow's dress and appearance. Now,
+tell me whether his face is pale, his mustache small and curved up
+in points, his eyes light gray, and never looking straight at you;
+his nose small, thin, and sharp; and, now I think of it, has he not
+got a small scar on one of his cheeks?"</p>
+<p>"Why, Mr. Wilkeson," exclaimed the boy Bog, "that's the very
+chap!"</p>
+<p>"Who is he?" asked the lieutenant of police, "that I may have
+him arrested at once."</p>
+<p>"He is the son--"</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="I_CHAPTER_V."></a>CHAPTER V.</h2>
+<h3>THE SORROW OF WHITE HAIRS</h3>
+<br>
+<p>At that moment the door opened, and the venerable form of
+Myndert Van Quintem appeared before them. Marcus cast a hasty
+glance, importing silence, at his companions, and rose to receive
+his old friend.</p>
+<p>Mr. Van Quintem's face expressed the tenderest compassion. He
+clasped Marcus's hand, and said:</p>
+<p>"My young friend, it deeply grieves me to see you here; for I
+feel--I may say I know morally--that you are innocent of any part
+in this murder."</p>
+<p>"Thank you for your confidence," said Marcus. "I hope, when Miss
+Minford and certain other witnesses are examined to-morrow, to
+prove my innocence conclusively."</p>
+<p>"So you will, I am sure. When I say that I know you are
+innocent, I found my belief on my short but pleasant acquaintance
+with you. But I cannot guess, from the evidence at the inquest
+yesterday and that of to-day--just published in the afternoon
+papers,--who committed the murder, or what was the motive of it.
+Have you any clue to the mystery?"</p>
+<p>"Yes--yes," replied Marcus. "We think we have a clue; but so
+slight, that it is hardly worth mentioning. My friends here are
+going to follow it up."</p>
+<p>"And in order that we may do so without any delay," said the
+lieutenant, "please give us the name of that sneaking letter
+writer."</p>
+<p>Marcus coughed, looked at the lieutenant knowingly, and said,
+"Oh, <i>that's</i> no consequence. It's a false scent. Depend on
+it."</p>
+<p>The old gentleman, as he entered the room, had caught Marcus
+Wilkeson's words. "He is the son--" and had observed the slight
+confusion with which Marcus had stopped saying something. He now
+noticed the glance enjoining silence, which Marcus had directed at
+the lieutenant of police.</p>
+<p>Mr. Van Quintem turned pale, as a harrowing suspicion came into
+his mind. "Mr. Wilkeson," he said, in a trembling voice, "will you
+answer me one question truly?"</p>
+<p>"I--I will," replied Marcus.</p>
+<p>"Then tell me, in Heaven's name, do you know of anything that
+connects my son with this monstrous crime? I have had a dreadful
+presentiment, all along, that he had something to do with it. The
+end of his wrong career will be the gallows. I have dreamt of it
+for years. O God! that I should have begotten such a profligate and
+miscreant into the world!"</p>
+<p>The old man made another pause, and then said, with a calmness
+that surprised his hearers. "Now I am ready to hear all."</p>
+<p>"And you shall," said Marcus, "though it pains me, my dear
+friend, to tell you what we know of your son. I will say, however,
+that there is no proof directly connecting him with the
+murder."</p>
+<p>"He is cunning and covers his tracks," said the wretched parent.
+"I know him well."</p>
+<p>Marcus then exhibited the letters. Mr. Van Quintem compared them
+carefully, but could not detect the least trace of resemblance.
+But, on examining the envelopes, at the suggestion of Fayette
+Overtop, he at once recognized the Hogarthian curve as a mark which
+he had always observed on his son's letters.</p>
+<p>"I could almost swear to this mark; and yet it is possible that
+he did not write the letters. Bad as he is, I will wait for further
+proofs. Please tell me all else that you know, Mr. Wilkeson."</p>
+<p>"With regard to the letter written to Miss Minford," said
+Marcus, "there is, unhappily, but little doubt; as this lad, who
+was well acquainted with the Minford family, can inform you."</p>
+<p>The boy Bog, very reluctantly, and with many awkward breaks, and
+swingings of his cap, repeated the history of the first letter, and
+described the young man's person most minutely, and told how he had
+followed him in his wild rambles about the town.</p>
+<p>The old man listened sadly and quietly; only now and then
+interrupting the boy's narrative with questions that were seemingly
+as calm as a judge's interrogatories.</p>
+<p>"He is a murderer. Something in the air tells me that he is,"
+murmured the old man. "And he is my son."</p>
+<p>The inexpressible heart-broken sadness, with which he uttered
+these words, brought tears to the eyes of his hearers.</p>
+<p>"It may be, my dear Mr. Van Quintem, that your son did not write
+the anonymous letters to Mr. Minford, notwithstanding the point of
+resemblance which we think we have detected. While sitting, at my
+window, I have often noticed him in his room scribbling at a desk,
+as if he were practising penmanship. Perhaps, if you examine the
+contents of the desk, you may get some further light on the
+subject. It is wonderful--most people would say impossible--that a
+man should write two letters so entirely dissimilar as these."</p>
+<p>"My son always excelled in writing. It was one of the branches
+that he took prizes in at school. I will examine the desk; but I
+fear I shall only confirm my strong suspicions that he is a
+murderer. O God! O God! Why did he not die with his sainted mother!
+Far better would that have been. It is a hard thing, gentlemen--it
+is a very hard thing; but if this boy of mine does not surrender
+himself to the hands of justice to-morrow, I shall--I shall--myself
+denounce him to the--"</p>
+<p>The afflicted man, overcome with the terrible conflict between a
+sense of public duty, and a lingering, inextinguishable parental
+affection, fainted and fell into the arms of Marcus, who sprang to
+catch him.</p>
+<p>While he was still insensible, the lieutenant of police, and the
+boy Bog, slipped out of the room, and started off on a search for
+Myndert Van Quintem, jr.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="I_CHAPTER_VI."></a>CHAPTER VI.</h2>
+<h3>WHAT PAPER, TYPES, AND INK CAN DO.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>When Marcus and his counsel, accompanied by the faithful
+lieutenant of police, arrived in a close carriage at the scene of
+the inquest, at the hour of adjournment next morning, they saw a
+convincing illustration of the power of paper, types, and ink.</p>
+<p>The morning journals, with whole leaded pages of evidence, and
+new diagrams of the house and fatal room; and the enterprising
+illustrated weekly, with portraits of the deceased, the prisoner,
+his counsel, Tiffles, Patching (great hat and all), Patty Minford,
+the coroner, the foreman of the jury, a full-page design of the
+murder, as it was supposed to have taken place, representing the
+infuriate Wilkeson, club in hand, standing over the prostrate body
+of the inventor, from whose forehead the gore was pouring in
+torrents--all these delightful, provocatives of sensation had done
+their full and perfect work.</p>
+<p>At that moment, Marcus Wilkeson was known to the world of
+readers in New York and the whole country round about, as the
+murderer of Eliphalet Minford.</p>
+<p>On the second morning of the inquest an immense crowd of people
+were assembled in front of the house. They had been collecting
+since five A.M., when a party of six Jerseymen, having sold off
+their stock of nocturnal cabbages at Washington Market, had taken
+position of vantage before the house, from which they and their
+wagons were afterward dislodged with great effort by a squad of
+police. Some butcher boys, also returning from their night's work
+at market, were next on the ground, and selected adjacent awning
+posts and trees, as good points of observation. Mechanics and shop
+girls, going to their labor, recklessly postponed the duties of the
+day, and stopped to stare, awestricken, at the house.</p>
+<p>A knot of people in a street, is like a drift of wood in a
+river. It chokes up the stream, and catches all the other wood that
+is floating down.</p>
+<p>The police had in vain tried to clear out this human throng.
+They had waged the following contests with their fellow citizens,
+since six o'clock A.M.:--first, they had driven the Jersey market
+wagons to the street corner below; second, they had tumbled the
+butcher boys out of the trees, where they hung like a strange
+species of fruit; third, they had cleared a space of ten feet
+square in front of the house. Having done thus much, the police
+paused from exhaustion, and endured the jokes of the populace with
+philosophic disdain.</p>
+<p>Three policemen guarded the door, within which no one was
+admitted but the coroner, the jury, witnesses, a few political
+friends of the coroner, who exhibited passes from him, and about
+twenty-five reporters, fifteen of whom really belonged to
+newspapers, and the remainder had a general connection with the
+press, which could never be clearly defined and established. To the
+magic word "reporter," accompanied by the flourish of a pencil and
+a roll of paper, the three policemen smiled obsequiously, and
+unbarred the way. Seeing how well this plan worked, two gentlemen
+of inelegant leisure, and at least one pickpocket, provided
+themselves with rolls of paper and pencils, and, giving the
+password, were admitted.</p>
+<p>As the carriage rolled round the corner of the street, bringing
+Marcus in full view of these acres of men, women, and children--all
+waiting for him--the little courage which he had plucked up failed
+him, as plucked-up courage generally does. The sound of mingled
+laughter, jokes, oaths, and exclamations of impatience reached his
+ears.</p>
+<p>"Great heavens!" he cried; "and I am to face all these people!"
+If his features could have been seen, at that instant, by some
+person who thought himself skilled in physiognomy, he would have
+been unhesitatingly pronounced guilty of several murders. Marcus
+sat in the rear part of the coach, and he leaned back to avoid
+observation.</p>
+<p>As the carriage entered the outskirts of the throng, they became
+aware that it contained the man of their desires. Five small boys,
+who had run all the way from the station house, had brought the
+exciting intelligence. The vehicle was at once surrounded by
+clamorous people.</p>
+<p>"Say, Mister, wich is the murderer, hey?" asked a red-shirted
+fellow of Matthew Maltboy, whose corpulent figure squeezed the thin
+form of Fayette Overtop into a corner of the front seat.</p>
+<p>Maltboy was not quick at thinking; but, on this occasion, a
+brave thought came into his head before he could turn to the
+speaker. "I am the prisoner," said he.</p>
+<p>"I knowed you wos," was the red-shirted reply, "by your--ugly
+face."</p>
+<p>"Thank you," said Matthew, meekly.</p>
+<p>"That's the chap that killed the old man--him with the big
+chops," said the red-shirted individual to his numerous red and
+other shirted friends about.</p>
+<p>"What! that fat cuss with the pig eyes?"</p>
+<p>"Zackly!"</p>
+<p>"He's the puffick image of his portrait in the--Weekly, isn't
+he?"</p>
+<p>"Like as two peas."</p>
+<p>There was truth in this; for the artist who sketched the
+portraits, had inadvertently placed Marcus's name under Matthew's
+portrait, and <i>vice versa</i>.</p>
+<p>"Well," said another man, an expert in human nature, "I'd
+convict that fellow of murder any time, on the strength of his
+looks. Never were the worst passions of our nature more prominently
+shown than in that bad face." Having said which, the speaker looked
+about for somebody to contradict him, and was disappointed in
+finding no one.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson said: "Here, Matt, none of that generous
+nonsense, if you please. I am the prisoner, my good people." As
+Marcus spoke, he stretched forward, and exhibited his face to the
+gaze of the red-shirted querist and his companions.</p>
+<p>"No, you don't!" said that fiery leader. "This blubbery chap is
+the one. We knows him by his picter."</p>
+<p>"No use disputing them, Mark," said Maltboy, with his
+indomitable smile.</p>
+<p>The friendly struggle was soon terminated by their arrival at
+the house. Here the human jam was tremendous; but the police, under
+the direction of the lieutenant, succeeded in getting their convoy
+safe within the entry. The door was then closed, and five sturdy
+policemen stood outside to guard it.</p>
+<p>On entering the room, everybody and everything were found just
+as they had been the day before--a day that seemed to Marcus a
+month ago. The jury were idling over the newspapers, or lazily
+turning their quids. The coroner, who looked a little the worse for
+his dinner of the day before, was bandying jokes with the facetious
+reporters. The other reporters were sharpening their pencils and
+laying out their note books. Some--the younger ones--were listening
+with a species of reverence, which they would soon outgrow, to the
+official jesting of the coroner. Others were squabbling over the
+right and title to certain chairs which possessed the extraordinary
+advantage of being a foot or two nearer the coroner than the other
+chairs. This is a grave cause of dispute among the reporters, and
+has been known to give rise to a great many hard words, and threats
+of subsequent chastisements, which are always indefinitely
+postponed.</p>
+<p>The coroner nodded, and said "good morning" to the comers, and
+assumed a temporary official dignity, by taking down his right leg
+from the arm of the chair over which it gracefully depended. He
+also fortified himself, by thrusting a sizable chew into a corner
+of his mouth, as if he were carefully loading a pistol.</p>
+<p>But neither the coroner, nor the jury, nor the reporters, nor
+the few private citizens who had obtained entrance by special
+dispensation, and sat gaping about the room, attracted the
+attention of the prisoner. Before him was one in whose presence all
+other persons faded into nothingness--the fair disturber of his
+peaceful life--the arbitress of his fate--Patty Minford.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="I_CHAPTER_VII."></a>CHAPTER VII.</h2>
+<h3>PET AS A WITNESS.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Little Pet sat on the low stool which she had always occupied,
+and which Marcus, in his strange sentimentality, had always
+considered sacred to her. She was veiled; but, through the thick
+gauze, he could see that her beautiful face was deathly pale. Her
+slender frame shook with little convulsions, that made the chair
+rattle.</p>
+<p>"Be calm, my dear child," said a stout, self-possessed woman who
+sat by her side, and held a bottle of salts conspicuously in her
+hand. "Remember, you have only to tell the trewth, and let the
+consekences fall where they may. Tell the trewth, as the old sayin'
+is, and shame the de--you know who."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull--for she it was--checked herself with a neat cough.
+Her three months' private education seemed to have been lost upon
+her. She could never speak correctly out of Miss Pillbody's sight.
+Fortunately, her heart needed no education. She had taken the poor
+orphan girl to her home, and been a mother to her. In that phrase
+there is an horizonless world of love.</p>
+<p>The deep, manly voice of Mrs. Crull carried assurance to the
+sinking heart of Patty. She took the extended hand, and pressed it,
+deriving strength from the contact of that strong, positive
+nature.</p>
+<p>"If you please, Mr. Cronner," said Mrs. Crull, "I think you'd
+better go ahead with her examination at once. Quickest said,
+soonest mended, you know."</p>
+<p>The prisoner and his counsel having taken their seats, the
+coroner having involuntarily thrown his right leg into the old,
+easy position, the jury having pricked up their ears, the reporters
+having cleared spaces for their elbows, the young girl proceeded to
+give her testimony. She was too nervous to make a clear, connected
+statement. Sometimes terror, sometimes tears, would choke her
+voice; but the cheering words and the smelling bottle of Mrs. Crull
+invariably "brought her round in no time," in the words of that
+estimable lady.</p>
+<p>Pet told the story of her return home on the fatal night, of her
+finding Mr. Wilkeson and her father in angry conversation; of her
+retiring to bed very much fatigued; of more conversation, growing
+angrier and angrier, which she overheard; of her marvellous vision
+in the night; of her waking next morning to find her vision true,
+and her father dead on the floor. All these facts, with which the
+reader is already familiar, the poor child made known to the jury
+in a fragmentary, roundabout way, as they were elicited by
+questions from the coroner, the jury, and occasionally the
+prisoner's counsel. The narrative of the vivid dream, or vision,
+produced a startling effect on the coroner, who was a firm believer
+in every species of supernaturalism winch is most at variance with
+human experience and reason.</p>
+<p>In his interrogatories to the witness, the coroner took the
+truth of the vision for granted. When she testified to the blows
+which (in her dream) she saw her father and the prisoner exchange,
+and the battered appearance of Mr. Wilkeson's face, the coroner
+looked at the prisoner, and was evidently disappointed to observe
+no traces of a bruise upon his pale brow or cheeks, nor the
+lightest discoloration about his eyes. But the absence of this
+corroboration did not, in the coroner's opinion, throw the least
+discredit on the dream.</p>
+<p>But the foreman of the jury, who had been listening with an
+affrighted look to the marvellous story, and believing it, had his
+faith sadly shaken by this discrepancy. Having been fireman ten
+years, and foreman of a hose company six years, he knew by large
+experience how long it took to tone down a black eye or reduce a
+puffed cheek. The foreman looked at the smooth, clear face of the
+prisoner, smiled incredulously, and shook his head at his
+associates.</p>
+<p>Fayette Overtop here acted his part with a skill worthy of a
+veteran. Instead of making a great ado over this weak point of the
+dream, he shrugged his shoulders, and smiled faintly at the jury.
+The jurors, who had been inclined, up to this time, to accept the
+dream as evidence, without question, now decided that it was
+nonsense.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson sat and listened, as if the scene and all the
+actors in it, himself included, were only a dream too. The young
+girl's evidence, of which he had not an inkling before, would have
+astounded him, if anything could. But he had reached that point of
+reaction in the emotions, where a stolid and complete apathy
+happily takes the place of high nervous excitement. He somehow felt
+certain of his acquittal, but was strangely benumbed to his
+fate.</p>
+<p>He looked at the witness--the holy idol of all his romantic and
+tender thoughts in days gone by--with unruffled composure. The
+marked stoicism of his demeanor was not lost on the reporters, and
+they noticed it in paragraphs to the effect that the prisoner
+exhibited a hardened indifference during the most thrilling portion
+of the evidence.</p>
+<p>QUESTION BY THE CORONER (<i>after thinking it over a bit</i>).
+"Who do you say struck the fust blow, miss? Remember, now, you're
+on oath."</p>
+<p>ANSWER. "My father, sir--or rather, I dreamed so."</p>
+<p>The coroner was disappointed again, for he hoped that the
+witness would, on second thought, fix the commencement of the
+actual assault on the prisoner. "Your father, being old and kind o'
+feeble, struck a light blow, I s'pose."</p>
+<p>WITNESS. "No, sir--a heavy one, I should judge; for it appeared
+to cut open Mr. Wilkeson's lip, and bruise his cheek. The blood
+seemed to run down his face in a stream." Here little Pet exhibited
+signs of faintness, which good Mrs. Crull stopped by an instant
+application of the smelling bottle.</p>
+<p>CORONER. "Mr. Wilkeson struck back a terrible blow in return, I
+s'pose."</p>
+<p>WITNESS. "Yes, sir. He hit my father right in the eye, raising a
+black and blue spot as large as a hen's egg." The painful
+recollection of this part of the dream so overpowered the witness,
+that she burst into tears, but was soon quieted by the motherly
+attentions of Mrs. Crull.</p>
+<p>FOREMAN OF THE JURY. "I don't want to hurt the young lady's
+feelin's, but this 'ere dream is all nonsense; and it strikes me
+we're a lot o' fools to be listenin' to it. Why, Harry, you know,
+as well as I do, that there wasn't no bruise on the old man's face,
+exceptin' the big one on his forehead. No more is there a sign of a
+scratch on the prisoner's mug there. It's all gammon."</p>
+<p>Three others of the jury nodded in approval of this sentiment.
+The remaining two shared somewhat in the coroner's reverence for
+dreams, and awaited further developments.</p>
+<p>The coroner turned his quid uneasily. "You can think as you
+please, Jack," said he: "but we'll see--we'll see." The coroner,
+like many other men of greater claims to wisdom, used this
+enigmatical expression when he could not see anything.</p>
+<p>A lawyer less crafty than Fayette Overtop would have protested
+against the reception of this singular testimony at the outset, and
+at intervals of a minute during its delivery. But he foresaw that,
+being a dream, it must be full of absurdities, which would surely
+betray themselves, and help his client. Besides, he was curious to
+hear all of the evidence, however ridiculous and worthless, against
+the prisoner.</p>
+<p>The witness then proceeded to the close of her testimony, amid
+the silence of all hearers. The narrative of the dreadful grapple,
+the struggle for the club, and the death blow given by Mr. Wilkeson
+to her prostrate father--all delivered with an intense earnestness,
+broken only by occasional sobs and pauses of anguish--produced a
+powerful impression. As she finished, and fell, half fainting, into
+the arms of Mrs. Crull, the coroner nodded his head slowly, and
+said:</p>
+<p>"What do you think of dreams now, Jack? Something in 'em,
+eh?"</p>
+<p>The foreman shared in the general feeling of awe; but he had
+given his opinion that the dream was nonsense, and stood by it.
+"It's strange," said he. "It's what the newspapers call a
+'strordinary quincidence,' that the young lady should 'a' dreamed
+out this murder so plain. I do' 'no' much about the science o'
+dreams, but I think this one might be explained somethin' in this
+way: The young lady heerd the old man and Mr. Wilkeson here talkin'
+strong, when she come home that night. She went to sleep with their
+conversation ringin' in her ears. Part on it she heerd in her
+dreams, and the rest she 'magined. She says she was afraid there
+would be trouble between 'em when she went to bed. The fight, and
+the murder, and all that, which she says she saw in a dream, or
+vision like, might have grown out o' that naterally enough. That's
+my notion of it, off hand. I've often gone to bed, myself, thinkin'
+of somethin' horrible that was goin' to happen, and dreamt that it
+did happen."</p>
+<p class="ctr"><img src="images/317.png" width="100%" alt=""><br>
+<b>THE INQUEST. MARCUS SPRINGS TO HIS FEET.</b></p>
+<p>This was precisely the theory upon which Fayette Overtop
+intended to explain the dream to the jury when the proper time
+arrived. He was glad that the foreman had done it instead; for he
+knew the tenacity with which a man, having given an opinion,
+defends it. To have so potent an advocate of his client's innocence
+on the jury, was a strong point.</p>
+<p>"Very good, old boy," said the coroner; "but, if the prisoner
+didn't commit the murder, who did?"</p>
+<p>This question, so manifestly unjust, and betraying the coroner's
+intention to sacrifice Marcus to a theory, roused that unfortunate
+man to consciousness, and he sprang to his feet. But the wiser
+Overtop placed his hands upon his friend's shoulder, whispered in
+his ear, and forced him reluctantly into his seat. Overtop knew
+that the argumentative foreman could best dispose of the
+coroner.</p>
+<p>The foreman replied to the coroner's question:</p>
+<p>"As to who did the murder, that's what we're here to find out.
+But, for one, I sha'n't bring in no man guilty till it's proved
+onto him."</p>
+<p>The foreman's face was a dull one, but it became suddenly
+luminous with an idea:</p>
+<p>"You say, miss, that you was waked by a noise as of somethin'
+heavy fallin' on the floor?"</p>
+<p>"Yes, sir."</p>
+<p>"You s'pose--as we all s'pose--that it was your father's body
+that fell, when he received his death blow?"</p>
+<p>"Yes, sir."</p>
+<p>"You say you heerd no one a-goin' out o' the room?"</p>
+<p>"No, sir."</p>
+<p>"That's not strange; for the murd'rer could 'a' slipped off his
+boots or shoes, and walked out puffickly quiet. I noticed, this
+mornin', and the other members of the jury can see for themselves,
+that the boards of the floor don't creak when you walk on 'em, nor
+the entry door neither when you open it. Didn't you never observe
+that succumstance?"</p>
+<p>"Yes, sir; but it did not occur to me when I woke up. I thought,
+if the dream had been true, that I should have heard Mr. Wilkeson
+moving around in the room, or going out of the door. I listened for
+a long time, as I have already said, and, hearing nobody, I thought
+the dream was nothing but a nightmare, as father used to call
+it."</p>
+<p>"One more question, miss, which may or may not be of some
+consekence. Haven't you no idee about what time it was when you was
+waked up by this noise of somethin' fallin'?"</p>
+<p>"No, sir; not the least. It might have been about midnight, I
+should guess."</p>
+<p>"Think a minute, miss, if you didn't hear any sound outside that
+could give you some idee of the time." The foreman fixed his eyes
+piercingly on the witness.</p>
+<p>She reflected a moment. "Yes--yes; I do remember, that when I
+jumped out of bed--which I did the very second that I woke up--and
+listened at the door, I heard the fire bells striking. Now, if
+anybody could tell what time that happened."</p>
+<p>"At precisely twenty-five minutes of twelve," said the foreman,
+in a solemn voice. "It was for the seventh district--the only 'larm
+that night. It was a false 'larm, and only three or four rounds was
+sounded. Did you hear the bell many times?"</p>
+<p>"Only two or three, and then it stopped. The sound was very
+plain, sir, because the bell tower is only a short distance from
+here, you know."</p>
+<p>"Exactly," said the foreman. "You woke up just as Uncle Ith was
+givin' off the last round."</p>
+<p>There was a deep, awestruck silence in the room; for all
+understood the object of these inquiries.</p>
+<p>"Now, gentlemen," continued the foreman, in a trembling voice,
+"let the prisoner only prove that he was a half, or a quarter, or
+an eighth of a mile from here when that 'larm was sounded, and I
+rather think he will clear himself. Where are the policemen that
+the prisoner saw that night?"</p>
+<p>A noise, as of heavy official boots, was heard on the stairs,
+sending a strange thrill through the hearts of all present.</p>
+<p>"God be praised," said Fayette Overtop, "if the lieutenant has
+found them." It was the first time that the model young lawyer had
+shown any signs of emotion.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="I_CHAPTER_VIII."></a>CHAPTER VIII.</h2>
+<h3>THE BENEFICENCE OF FIRE BELLS.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The door opened, and the tall form of the police lieutenant
+appeared, attended by two patrolmen. The patrolmen, on entering,
+looked directly at the prisoner, and seemed to recognize him. The
+police lieutenant appeared to be pleased with his success in
+finding the witnesses, after a hunt through several station houses;
+but he was not aware what importance the testimony which they could
+give had suddenly acquired. The witnesses had been searched for at
+the suggestion of Fayette Overtop, with the vague hope of making
+them useful in some way.</p>
+<p>The coroner scowled at the witnesses, for he feared that they
+would prove the man innocent, who, in his opinion, was the
+murderer. Having adopted this theory at the outset, and staked the
+whole issue upon it, he felt a natural reluctance to give it
+up.</p>
+<p>The lieutenant explained to the coroner that the two officers
+could probably throw some light on the prisoner's movements, the
+night of the murder.</p>
+<p>The coroner administered the oath to both of them, as
+follows:</p>
+<p>"Holeup your ri't'an'. You swear to tell truth, th'ole truth,
+nothin' but truth, s'elpyeGod. Kiss the book."</p>
+<p>The men complied with these impressive formalities, and the
+coroner then proceeded to interrogate one of them--a strapping
+fellow with an intensely Irish face.</p>
+<p>"Name?" said the coroner.</p>
+<p>"Patrick O'Dougherty, yer Honor."</p>
+<p>The phrase "Yer Honor" produced its customary gracious
+effect.</p>
+<p>"Do you spell O'Dougherty with a 'k,'?" asked the coroner.</p>
+<p>"Hang me if I knows!" said the O'Dougherty. "I niver spilt it.
+Spill it to suit yezself, yer Honor."</p>
+<p>"Spell it in the usual way, with a 'k'" said the coroner,
+turning to the reporters.</p>
+<p>"Your residence, Mr. O'Dougherty?"</p>
+<p>"Me what?"</p>
+<p>"Your residence. Where do you live?"</p>
+<p>"Oh! it's fare I live yer want to know. In Mulberry street, near
+Baxter."</p>
+<p>"You belong to the perlice, I believe?" asked the coroner.</p>
+<p>"It's quare ye should ax me that!" replied the O'Dougherty, with
+an enormous smile.</p>
+<p>"Because you have the perliceman's hat, club, and badge? You
+forget," said the coroner, patronizingly, "that courts of justice
+doesn't know nothin' until it's proved to them. As a coroner, I
+shouldn't know my own grandmother, until she swore to herself."</p>
+<p>"'Tisn't that, yer Honor; but becos yer got me onto the perlice
+yerself. Don't yer 'member, on 'lection day, I smashed two ticket
+booths of t'other can'date, in the Sixth Ward, lickt as much as a
+dozen men who was workin' agen ye, an' din was put into the Tumes
+over night--bad luck to the Tumes, I say! Well, yer Honor, ye was
+'lected coroner by a small vote; an', in turn for me services, ye
+got me 'p'inted--"</p>
+<p>"Ah! oh! I remember, now," said the coroner, somewhat confused.
+"I did not know you in the perliceman's dress. Well, Mr.
+O'Dougherty, did you see the prisoner on the night of the
+murder?"</p>
+<p>"I did, yer Honor. It was about twelve o'clock. I was sittin' on
+a bar'l in front of Pat McKibbin's store, corner of Washin'ton and
+---- streets. I was watchin' the bar'l, yer Honor, becos Pat
+McKibbin had some of 'em stole lately, ye see."</p>
+<p>"Could yer swear to him, Mr. O'Dougherty?"</p>
+<p>"Could I shwear to me own mother?--Hivin rest her sowl! Bedad, I
+shud know him a thousan' years from now. Didn't he shtop and light
+his siggar at me poipe? And didn't his nose touch me own?"</p>
+<p>"Did he look pale and excited?" asked the coroner.</p>
+<p>"No, yer Honor; his face was red as a brick, an', though it was
+a cowld night, he looked to be warm wid fasht walkin'."</p>
+<p>"Did he say anythin'?"</p>
+<p>"No; he only axed for a light."</p>
+<p>"Was his 'pearance 'spicious?"</p>
+<p>"No, yer Honor, more'n yer own. No offince to yez."</p>
+<p>"That'll do, Mr. O'Dougherty. Next witness."</p>
+<p>"If you please, your Honor," said the smooth Overtop, rising,
+"you have accidentally omitted to ask one very important question.
+The prisoner stated, on his preliminary examination, you remember,
+that, when he stopped to light a cigar from the pipe of a
+policeman, he heard the sound of a fire bell commencing to strike.
+Miss Minford testifies, that when she was roused from sleep by the
+noise of her father falling to the floor, she heard the alarm for
+the Seventh District. McKibbin's store, at the corner of Washington
+and ---- streets, is more than half a mile from here. In view of
+these facts, I will, with your Honor's permission, ask Mr.
+O'Dougherty if he heard the fire alarm that night; and, if so,
+whether the prisoner was in sight at the time?"</p>
+<p>"Shure, an' I heerd it," answered the O'Dougherty. "It was fur
+the Seventh District. An' wasn't this gin'leman here at the ind o'
+me poipe, jist when it begun to bang away?"</p>
+<p>Overtop cast one triumphant glance at the jury, which was fully
+reciprocated by the foreman and four others.</p>
+<p>"I have no more questions to ask, your Honor," said Overtop.</p>
+<p>"Nor I," said the coroner, "as the witness's testimony has no
+great bearin' on the case, that I can see. What is jour name,
+Mister--er--"</p>
+<p>"Thomas Jelliman," responded the second policeman, a stout,
+bluff, honest-looking fellow. He did not say "Your Honor," and
+thereby offended the coroner.</p>
+<p>"Well, what's yer bizness, anyhow?" asked the coroner,
+curtly.</p>
+<p>"I should think you would remember that I was a policeman," said
+the witness, looking the coroner straight in the eye.</p>
+<p>The coroner, taking a second observation of the witness,
+recalled him as the identical officer who had arrested him, one
+Christmas night, for drunkenness, and locked him up in the station
+house. This little occurrence was before his election to the
+dignified and responsible office of County Coroner.</p>
+<p>"If you don't remember me," said the witness, "I think I could
+bring myself to your mind easy. On a certain Christmas night, not
+many years ago--"</p>
+<p>"Never mind the particulars, Mr. Jelliman," observed the
+coroner. "Come to look at yer, I recolleck yer very well. Ahem!
+What do you know about this 'ere case, Mr. Jelliman?"</p>
+<p>"Nothing, sir, except that I can swear to having seen the
+prisoner, on the night of the murder, at the corner of West and
+---- streets. He was smoking a cigar, and walking fast. As he
+passed me, he said, 'A cold night, Mr. Policeman.' This made me
+notice him particularly, because it isn't very often that people
+throw away civilities on us. Just as he turned the corner below me,
+the alarm bells struck the last round for the Seventh District.
+They had struck three or four rounds. That is all I know about the
+affair."</p>
+<p>"I have no other questions to ask, Mr. Jelliman," said the
+coroner, with great politeness.</p>
+<p>The coroner was baffled. He had staked the whole case upon the
+theory of Marcus Wilkeson's guilt, and had made no attempt to
+procure other testimony than what would prove that supposition. He
+scratched his head and rolled his quid in a perfect quandary.</p>
+<p>Another noise was heard on the stairs, as of several persons
+hurriedly ascending.</p>
+<p>Then the door opened, and an excited group made its appearance.
+In advance was a slender young man, whose face was pale with
+debauchery. His clothes were rich, and had an unpleasantly new
+look. As he stepped over the threshold, he glanced coolly about the
+room, and, his eyes resting on the coroner, smiled.</p>
+<p>"Ah, Myndert, my boy," said the coroner, "what are you here
+for?"</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="I_CHAPTER_IX."></a>CHAPTER IX.</h2>
+<h3>AN OLD MAN'S OFFERING.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>"Hang me if I know, Harry! It's the old man's work. He'll
+explain it to you."</p>
+<p>Behind this easy young man came a strong policeman, who,
+immediately upon his entrance, received a nod of approbation from
+the lieutenant. Behind the policeman walked, with bended white head
+and tottering limbs, the venerable Mr. Van Quintem. The old
+gentleman was partly supported, in his infirmity, by the boy Bog.
+It was a touching sight to see the confiding trust with which the
+weakness of sixty-eight clung to the strong arm of nineteen. Bog
+hung down his head modestly, and blushed. He was not seen even to
+look at the little veiled figure which sat in the middle of the
+room. But young Myndert Van Quintem looked at it, and bowed with
+the deepest respect. The bow was answered by a faint nod and a
+delicate blush. Mrs. Crull observed the interchange of
+recognitions, and frowned to herself.</p>
+<p>"Mr. Coroner," said the old gentleman, straightening himself,
+and coming forward with a quick step, as one who was about to
+perform an unpleasant task, and would hurry through it, "this young
+man is my son. God knows what love I have lavished upon him from
+the day that he was born, and with what ingratitude he has repaid
+me. But--but that is neither here nor there. I have come here to
+deliver him up to you as a prisoner--"</p>
+<p>"As a prisoner!" echoed the coroner; and he and all looked
+amazed at this strange announcement.</p>
+<p>"Why should it surprise you? It is a simple act of justice. I
+have reason to think that my son knows something about this murder"
+(here the old gentleman's voice faltered); "and my duty, as a good
+citizen and an honest man, requires me to surrender him. There are
+other affairs of a private nature between myself and my son--he
+knows to what I refer --which I am not prepared to make public at
+the present time." The old gentleman looked significantly at his
+son, who smiled calmly at him in return.</p>
+<p>A chair was brought for Mr. Van Quintem, sen., and he sank into
+it. The young man seated himself in another chair which was handed
+to him by the attentive coroner himself.</p>
+<p>"Now, Myndert, my good fellow," said the coroner, "if yer knows
+anything about this affair, fire away."</p>
+<p>"Will the coroner be good enough to swear the witness?" asked
+Fayette Overtop.</p>
+<p>"Oh! I'd quite forgot it." And the coroner mumbled his
+irreverent jargon.</p>
+<p>"Two minutes are enough to tell you all I know, Harry," said the
+young man, in a sweet, effeminate voice. "I happened to save Miss
+Minford's life, a few months ago--she will give you the
+particulars, no doubt, if you desire them--and that is the way I
+made her acquaintance." (Here another respectful bow to the young
+lady.) "Since then, I have met her, quite accidentally, a few
+times, and--I do not pretend to conceal it--have gradually come to
+feel an interest--a brotherly interest, I may call it--in her."
+(The coroner smiled.) "Having learned from her that she was
+receiving her education at the expense of Mr. Wilkeson, and that
+that gentleman was a constant visitor at her father's house I
+thought it proper, as a sincere and disinterested friend of the
+young lady, to make some inquiries into his character. Judging,
+from the result of these inquiries, that his designs were not
+honorable toward Miss Minford--Mr. Wilkeson will pardon the
+expression, but I am under oath, and must tell the truth as to my
+motives--I took the liberty of writing a note to Mr. Minford,
+merely cautioning him against Mr. Wilkeson. I did not sign my name
+to the note, because I was not personally acquainted with Mr.
+Minford--in fact, never saw him in my life--and did not wish to
+assume the responsibility, disagreeable to every sensitive person,
+of interfering in another man's family affairs. The object of the
+note was to make Mr. Minford cautious. I presume no one will
+undertake to say that a father can be too cautious concerning the
+honor of a young and lovely daughter." (Another respectful glance
+at Miss Minford.) "I am aware anonymous letters are a little
+irregular, in the opinions of most people. But, when sent with a
+good motive, I really don't see the harm in them."</p>
+<p>"Nor I neither," said the coroner. "It strikes me they're
+correct enough when the motive's a good 'un."</p>
+<p>"But, your Honor, when an anonymous letter is full of lies and
+slanders, I respectfully submit that it is a piece of cowardly
+malice, which the law ought to punish with the utmost severity."
+Fayette Overtop spoke with tranquillity and firmness, looking young
+Van Quintem directly in the eye, and making him quail.</p>
+<p>The judicious phrase, "Your Honor," alone saved Overtop from an
+explosion of official wrath. "The Court can't allow these
+interruptions, Mr. Overtop," said the coroner. "Her dignity must be
+maintained. As for 'nonymous letters, whether it's right or wrong
+to send them, people will differ. The coroner and the jury is
+competent to judge for themselves. Go ahead, Myndert."</p>
+<p>"As the first letter seemed to have no effect, I sent another,
+suggesting that Mr. Minford should inquire into Mr. Wilkeson's
+history in the little village of----, Westchester County, where he
+was born, and lived many years. I learned from Miss Minford that
+her father visited Westchester County one day, and presume that he
+made some important discoveries there; for Miss Minford told me,
+that, on his return, he had forbidden Mr. Wilkeson to come to the
+house. If there was any harm in putting Mr. Minford on the track to
+find out the real truth about the man who was a constant attendant
+at his fireside, I do not see it."</p>
+<p>"Nor I neither," said the coroner. "The end, as the sayin' is,
+justifies the means."</p>
+<p>"If your Honor pleases," said the facile Overtop, "we could
+easily prove that all the reports which Mr. Minford gathered in
+Westchester County, prejudicial to my client, arose from a
+confounding of another person with him. But, as this explanation
+would involve the disclosure of private family affairs, and also
+the reflection of disgrace on the memory of the dead, my client
+prohibits me from saying more on the subject. But all this, as none
+knows better than your Honor, has nothing to do with the case. We
+ask that my client shall either be proved guilty of the murder, or
+of some knowledge of it, or released."</p>
+<p>Fayette Overtop here looked volumes of confidence at the jury;
+and five of the jury looked back volumes of agreement with him.</p>
+<p>"Nobody can be in a bigger hurry than me, Mr. Overtop," said the
+coroner, with tolerable good nature. "These 'ere inquests,
+commencin' in the mornin' and holdin' on a good part of the day,
+are rather hard on a chap 'customed to his 'leven-o'clock drink. I
+have to make up for the loss by adjournin' early in the arternoon.
+Ha! ha! Now, Myndert, my boy, rush her through. You don't know
+anythin' about the murder, I s'pose. You were somewhere else on the
+fatal night, of course--and I can guess where. At Brown's, eh?"</p>
+<p>Brown's was a notorious gambling house on Broadway.</p>
+<p>"Exactly, Harry. I was at Brown's from nine P.M. to four o'clock
+the following morning. And, if I mistake not, there is a gentleman
+in this room who can swear to having seen me there, say from ten to
+eleven." Saying this, young Van Quintem winked hard at the
+coroner.</p>
+<p>"You needn't mince matters," said the coroner. "I was at Brown's
+that night, and between the hours you name. Being a public officer,
+I sometimes look into Brown's, and a good many other places, too,
+to see that nothin' a'n't a-goin' on wrong. Ha! I partickly 'member
+it, because I accidentally lost about fifty dollars there that
+night. Ha! ha!"</p>
+<p>"I think I recollect the little circumstance," said the witness,
+with a smile.</p>
+<p>"Very likely. Ha! Now, Myndert, of course we all understand that
+you are innocent; but, to satisfy the public, I guess I'd better
+summon a few witnesses from Brown's, to prove you were there all
+night."</p>
+<p>"I thought of that, Harry, and requested a number of my friends
+at Brown's to drop around here, and prove an <i>alibi</i> for me.
+They were very much engaged at the time, or they would have come
+with me."</p>
+<p>"They were playing faro," said the old gentleman, "and my son
+was gambling with them. Wretched young man, how often have I
+cautioned you against that vice!"</p>
+<p>"The cautioning I don't object to," said the son; "but I
+consider it unfair to drag a fellow away from a streak of good
+luck. I was raking in the piles just as you and the policeman, and
+that mop-headed youth behind you" (he alluded to the boy Bog) "came
+down on me. Ah! I see the game is finished, and here they are."</p>
+<p>Four men, of a highly correct appearance, dressed in quiet good
+taste, who would have passed in the Broadway muster for merchants
+of the severest practical variety, entered the room.</p>
+<p>They nodded in the most gentlemanly manner to the coroner, and
+gave a friendly recognition to young Myndert.</p>
+<p>"You may be willing to believe these polished scoundrels under
+oath; but hang me if I would!" said the old gentleman, with
+emphasis.</p>
+<p>The four gamblers showed their even rows of white teeth
+pleasantly, and one of them replied:</p>
+<p>"You are an elderly gentleman, Mr. Van Quintem, and the father
+of our young friend; and, of course, you are permitted to abuse us
+as much as you like."</p>
+<p>"It seems to me, Mr. Van Quintem," said the coroner, "that you
+are rather hard on these gen'lemen, who, so fur as I know 'em, is
+of the highest respectability. Don't yer want to have yer son prove
+an <i>alibi?</i>"</p>
+<p>"I want to have him prove the truth, and that's all. And for
+that reason I wouldn't credit such evidence as these men will
+give."</p>
+<p>"You would like to have me hanged, my dear father," said the
+son, mildly; "but I don't think you will be gratified in that
+amiable little desire. Eh, Harry?"</p>
+<p>The coroner grinned, shifted his quid, put on his most serious
+official look, and said:</p>
+<p>"No more of this 'ere jokin', if you please, gen'lemen. A
+inquest isn't zactly the place for fun."</p>
+<p>He then proceeded to swear and interrogate the four new
+witnesses. They took the oath decorously, kissing the book in the
+politest, most gentlemanly manner. Their testimony was to the
+effect that young Van Quintem passed the night of the murder, from
+ten P.M. till four A.M., at Brown's, and was not absent one minute.
+They were able to corroborate the fact, by a reference to pocket
+memorandum books, in which entries such as "Van Q., debit $50," or
+"Van Q., credit $100," appeared at intervals. As to the general
+character of the house, upon which several members of the jury
+asked questions, they testified that it was a species of club
+house, where a few gentlemen of excellent reputation occasionally
+met for the purposes of innocent social intercourse. Games of
+chance were sometimes played at Brown's, to while away an hour; and
+betting was now and then done, in a strictly honorable and
+legitimate way. Several of the jurymen would have improved the
+occasion, to learn all about the internal management of Brown's;
+but the coroner decided that such questions were entirely
+"relevant" (meaning irrelevant), and suggested that, as there were
+no more witnesses, the case might as well go to the jury. The
+coroner had just consulted his watch, and found that it was four
+o'clock. He was aware, from the turn things had taken, that he had
+lost the verdict which he hoped to obtain; but that was no reason
+why he should lose his dinner. The coroner was not a man of energy;
+and, being foiled in his efforts to convict Marcus Wilkeson, he had
+no disposition to pursue the matter further. Besides, he had
+already achieved a large measure of profitable notoriety from the
+case; for he had been ridiculed and abused in most of the city
+papers; and <i>that</i> insured him, beyond all doubt, the
+nomination for and election to the State Senate, for which he was
+an aspirant at the next fall campaign. Under all these
+circumstances, the coroner was satisfied.</p>
+<p>The jurors, receiving but a shilling a day, and being hungry and
+tired, were quite willing to wind up the case. After putting their
+heads together, whispering and nodding about five minutes, the
+foreman declared the following as their verdict:</p>
+<p>"That the deceased, Eliphalet Minford, came to his death, on the
+night of the ---- day of April, 185-, from a wound inflicted on the
+head by a club in the hands of some person unknown to the
+jurors."</p>
+<p>Overtop and Maltboy took the verdict as a matter of course,
+having anticipated it for some time. Marcus Wilkeson, who had been
+in a gloomy stupor for the past hour, and had expected the worst,
+looked up in surprise at this lucky dispensation of Fate. Tears
+sprang to his eyes, and he extended a hand to each of his faithful
+friends, by whom he was warmly congratulated on the happy issue of
+the affair. The jurors also came forward with their
+congratulations. Even the coroner said, "Well, Mr. Wilkeson, I did
+my pootiest to hold you, because I thought you was the murderer;
+but the jury doesn't indorse my 'pinion, and I gives in." Mrs.
+Crull, who had been watching Marcus narrowly, and was firmly
+impressed with the conviction of his innocence, came forward with a
+warm hand, and tried to think of a proverb suitable to the
+occasion, but could not. Patty Minford removed the veil from her
+face, and looked at her benefactor. She made a motion as if to rise
+and go toward him. Then an expression of doubt stole over her
+features; and Marcus, who observed her at that moment, knew that
+the vision of the night was still before her, and that she could
+not hold him guiltless though a dozen juries had released him. This
+thought touched Marcus with sadness, which all the congratulations
+of his friends could not disperse.</p>
+<p>A faint cry was heard. Old Mr. Van Quintem had fallen from his
+chair, and would have dropped upon the floor, but for the strong
+arm of the boy Bog. He was in the act of rising from his seat for
+the purpose of offering his hand to Marcus, when the vertigo, from
+which he was an occasional sufferer, seized him.</p>
+<p>"Poor old gentleman!" said Marcus, forgetful of all else, and
+rushing to the side of his venerable friend. Directing that the
+windows be opened, Marcus, aided by the boy Bog, bore the senseless
+form to the fresh, cool air. The grateful breeze, and a cup of cold
+water applied to his brow, soon restored the wretched father to a
+beginning of consciousness.</p>
+<p>As he lay there, more dead than alive, in the arms of his two
+friends, the ingrate son, having lighted a cigar, looked coldly
+over the shoulders of the bystanders at the senseless figure of his
+father, and said, in the sweetest voice:</p>
+<p>"Poor old fellow! He has only himself to blame for kicking up
+all this row. I told him it would be too much for his nerves; but
+he would insist on dragging me up here. I forgive him from the
+bottom of my heart."</p>
+<p>The bystanders looked on in amazement at this speech.</p>
+<p>The son continued: "I'm glad to see that he is in good hands.
+Upon my word, nothing would give me greater pleasure than to help a
+little; but I fear that, when the old man came out of it, and saw
+me over him, he would go off again. So I guess I had better
+leave."</p>
+<p>And young Van Quintem sauntered cheerfully out of the room, in
+company with his four friends from Brown's. The coroner had been
+waiting at the foot of the stairs for them; and the party adjourned
+to the nearest drinking saloon, when the coroner, overjoyed at
+having got rid of a tedious and embarrassing case, stood treat for
+one round.</p>
+<p>But who killed the inventor?</p>
+<p>The papers and the police, after groping for weeks in search of
+the answer, turned it over to the solution of Time, with the
+comforting assurance that MURDER WILL OUT.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_TENTH."></a>BOOK TENTH.</h2>
+<h3>DONE ON BOTH SIDES.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="J_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>A FISHER OF MEN.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Mr. Augustus Whedell was a gentleman who had been living
+handsomely for three years on his wits.</p>
+<p>There was nothing remarkable in Mr. Whedell's personal
+appearance, with the exception of his wig. It was his fond belief
+that this wig looked like natural hair; but everybody knew it was a
+wig across the street. He also wore a gold double eyeglass, which
+he handled as effectively as a senorita her fan. Most of his loans,
+credits, and extensions, had been obtained by the dexterous
+manipulation of that eyeglass.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell twirled the dangerous instrument, and opened and
+shut it with more than his usual grace, one evening toward the
+middle of April. He was about to broach a disagreeable subject to
+his daughter, who, blooming, and exquisitely dressed, sat by the
+fire and yawned.</p>
+<p>"My dear Clementina, you are now twenty years old, and ought to
+be married. Delays are dangerous. What do you think of
+Chiffield?"</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell spoke bluntly, and to the point, because he was
+addressing his own daughter, and also because short speeches suited
+his natural languor.</p>
+<p>"He's a horrid dancer!" said that young lady.</p>
+<p>"Granted. But when he does dance, he jingles money in his
+pocket."</p>
+<p>"He's a perfect fright, pa. You won't deny that?"</p>
+<p>"I won't deny that he is a plain, substantial gentleman. He has
+immense feet, and he is a little bald. What of that?"</p>
+<p>"Oh! nothing," replied Clementina, in a tone that signified
+"Everything."</p>
+<p>Her father caught the irony of the remark, and said:</p>
+<p>"My dear child, I know the natural leaning of your sex to
+handsome men. You are like your mother there. But remember, they
+never have any money--as a general rule. I won't undertake to
+explain the curious fact. But fact it is, you will admit that."</p>
+<p>"Very likely. But I hate this old Chiffield."</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell smiled, twirled his double eyeglass a few dozen
+times round his forefinger, and said:</p>
+<p>"My darling daughter, listen, and you will appreciate the
+advantages of this match."</p>
+<p>Clementina frowned, and bit her finger nails.</p>
+<p>"My child," continued the fond parent, "I have always concealed
+my troubles from you. They can no longer be kept a secret. This
+house is not mine. Most of this furniture is unpaid for. The last
+month's bills at the butcher's, baker's, and grocer's are still
+due. I have exhausted my credit, and don't know where to raise a
+dollar. That is my 'situation,' as the newspapers say."</p>
+<p>Clementina turned pale with amazement, and could not say a
+word.</p>
+<p>"You are willing to hear me? I will explain further. Three years
+ago, my old friend Mr. Abernuckle failed. He owned this house, and,
+wishing to save it from his creditors, he had previously made a
+sham sale of it to me. I have occupied it free of rent. On the
+strength of this house, I got credit for furniture, for clothes,
+for our bread and meat. On the strength of this house, I have
+borrowed money enough to keep my principal creditors at bay. On the
+strength of this house, we occupy to-day a very fair position in
+society. On the strength of this house, I propose to marry
+you."</p>
+<p>His daughter still looked on with open mouth, like one
+stupefied.</p>
+<p>"But, to do this, no time must be lost. My friend Abernuckle has
+at last settled with his creditors at fifteen per cent., and wants
+possession of the house on the 1st of May. On that day this will be
+our home no longer."</p>
+<p>There was a fearless pull at the door bell. "It is a creditor,"
+said Mr. Whedell. "I will face him."</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell went to the door, and returned in a few moments. "It
+was the butcher," said he. "He had called twice to-day, and, not
+finding me in, takes this unusual hour to ask for a settlement. The
+old excuses would not do. What do you suppose I told him this
+time?"</p>
+<p>"I can't imagine. Something dreadful, I suppose," was the
+shuddering reply.</p>
+<p>"The man had to be got rid of. We must have meat. I was at my
+wits' end. So I took the liberty of telling him, confidentially,
+that my daughter would marry a wealthy merchant in a few days, and
+asked him, as a favor, to let the bill run on to the 1st of May. On
+that day he should positively be paid. The man grumbled at first,
+but finally said he would give me one more trial, and then went
+away. Neatly arranged, wasn't it, my dear?"</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell would have been delighted with one word of approval
+(even a qualified one) from his daughter, but she would not, or
+could not speak it.</p>
+<p>"You listen attentively, my darling. I am glad to see it. This
+plan worked so well with the butcher, that I shall try it on with
+the upholsterer, the baker, the grocer, the tailor, and the rest of
+my long list of creditors. I shall stake all on the 1st of May. To
+save us from a grand explosion, and to obtain a roof for your head
+and mine on the 1st of May, you must marry immediately."</p>
+<p>Miss Clementina Whedell, like many other people, had an
+unsuspected strength of character which only a great occasion could
+call out. "It is perfectly atrocious," said she, at length, "and I
+am making a grave sacrifice of my happiness; but I suppose I must
+do it. Are you sure this Chiffield is rich?"</p>
+<p>"Now, you are my own dear daughter!" said Mr. Whedell, tossing
+his double eyeglass up and catching it, as was his custom when
+exulting. "Your question is a prudent one, and worthy of you. I am
+happy to inform you that Chiffield is worth one hundred and fifty
+thousand dollars."</p>
+<p>Clementina smiled faintly, though she tried to look like a
+martyr.</p>
+<p>"I learn this from the tax rolls. When Chiffield first began to
+call here, and showed a profound interest in my conversation, I
+knew that he was after you, and I thought it best to look into his
+resources. The tax rolls, which are the best possible evidence,
+show that he has ten lots in Harlem, with a cottage tenement on
+each of them, and several acres now rented to German gardeners in
+the Twelfth Ward. These are rated in a lump at seventy-five
+thousand dollars, which is a low estimate. So much for the real
+estate. Now the personal property of Upjack, Chiffield &amp; Co. is
+valued on the same tax rolls (which always understate it) at three
+hundred thousand dollars. Suppose Chiffield to own a one-fourth
+interest only, and there you have the item of seventy-five thousand
+dollars more. Grand total, one hundred and fifty thousand dollars.
+A nearer figure would probably be two hundred thousand dollars; but
+I will not build castles in the air for you. Chiffield is only
+forty--which is, in fact, young. He is healthy and energetic. The
+firm are making money. He will yet be a millionnaire. Confess, now,
+that I have chosen wisely for you."</p>
+<p>Here another decisive pull at the door bell. Mr. Whedell
+answered it in person. Returning, he merely said, giving his double
+eyeglass a fillip, "The furniture man. Have fixed him for the 1st
+of May. So far, the plan works well."</p>
+<p>"But are you sure, pa," asked the discreet Clementina, "that Mr.
+Chiffield will offer himself?"</p>
+<p>"Positive; because he has always been so very attentive to me.
+When men flatter, and study the hobbies of the father, they are
+after the daughter in earnest. Mr. Chiffield's very figure--the cut
+of his jib, so to speak--is that of a marrying man. Only you must
+give him some little encouragement. Not keep him at a distance, as
+you have hitherto done."</p>
+<p>"But he may not be anxious to marry before the 1st of May. Then
+what?"</p>
+<p>"Poor thing! how little you understand mankind! He will marry
+you at twenty-four hours' notice, if you will let him. All men are
+alike impatient and unreasonable in such matters. It is the women
+who hold back--after they are safely engaged."</p>
+<p>"La, pa! how knowingly you talk!"</p>
+<p>"I flatter myself I know something of the human species,"
+returned Mr. Whedell. "Ah! another ring. Too faint for a creditor.
+Mr. Chiffield, perhaps."</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="J_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>PLAYING WITH THE LINE.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The conjecture was correct. But with Mr. Chiffield came Matthew
+Maltboy. They had arrived on the door steps at the same moment,
+coming from different directions.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell received Chiffield with his heartiest grip, and
+inflicted only a mild squeeze on the hand of Maltboy, whose
+appearance at that time he considered decidedly unfortunate. The
+father thought he had observed in Clementina signs of preference
+for that corpulent young lawyer. He was pained to see that
+Clementina barely extended the tips of her fingers to Chiffield,
+while to Maltboy she gave her whole palm with great cordiality. Not
+only this, but she encouraged Maltboy to take a seat by her, and
+commenced talking with him of the opera, of balls, of new music, of
+fashions, of the last novel, rattling away on these subjects as if
+her whole soul were wrapped up in the discussion. It was almost a
+monologue. Maltboy's part consisted of "Yes;" "I think so too;" "We
+agree perfectly," and adjectives of admiration occasionally thrown
+in. That musical voice! He could have listened with rapture to its
+recital of the multiplication table.</p>
+<p>Mr. Chiffield and Mr. Whedell had settled themselves on a
+<i>t&ecirc;te-&agrave;-t&ecirc;te</i>, and, after some cursory
+observations on the weather, commenced talking of finance--a theme
+of which neither of those gentlemen ever tired.</p>
+<p>"So money is getting tighter?" said Mr. Whedell, after a pause
+to digest the awful truth which Mr. Chiffield had imparted to him.
+"Now I shouldn't be surprised, sir, to hear of failures before
+long, and in quarters where the public least expect them."</p>
+<p>If Mr. Whedell's double eyeglass had been astride his nose
+instead of swinging in his fingers, he might have noticed a faint
+paleness blending with the deep yellow of Mr. Chiffield's
+complexion. That gentleman replied, a little more quickly than was
+his wont:</p>
+<p>"A few small, weak houses may go down, perhaps, but the strong
+ones will weather the storm easy enough. If our establishment could
+live through 1847, it is in no danger now."</p>
+<p>"And such was the good fortune of Upjack, Chiffield &amp; Co., I
+well remember," said Mr. Whedell.</p>
+<p>Mr. Chiffield bowed his gracious acknowledgment of the handsome
+historical allusion.</p>
+<p>"How is Erie, Mr. Chiffield?"</p>
+<p>"Looking up."</p>
+<p>"Sure of it?"</p>
+<p>"A leading Wall-street man told me, this afternoon, it would
+advance three per cent. this week. I have a slight interest in
+watching it," said Mr. Chiffield, smiling.</p>
+<p>"So have I," said Mr. Whedell, smiling also.</p>
+<p>Daring their conversation, and the remainder of their financial
+dialogue, Mr. Whedell kept one ear, and occasionally one eye,
+inclined toward his daughter and the favored Maltboy. If there was
+a hint conveyed in those side glances at his daughter, she either
+did not notice it, or did not choose to take it. Sometimes Mr.
+Chiffield looked in the same direction, but casually, as it were,
+and without one sign of impatience visible in the depths of his
+calm brown eyes. Mr. Chiffield was not a nervous man.</p>
+<p>Matthew Maltboy was so perfectly free from selfishness at this
+moment, that he would cheerfully have spared a few words from Miss
+Whedell's delightful monologue for the gratification of his late
+rival ("late" was now decidedly the word, in Maltboy's opinion)
+over the way. In the exercise of his large charity and compassion,
+he pitied that unfortunate, sadly disappointed dealer in dry
+goods.</p>
+<p>This pity, as Matthew used to say in after days, was thrown
+away. At the end of a brilliant description of a new set of
+quadrilles which Miss Whedell had danced at a sociable the night
+before, that young lady said, "Excuse me," and crossed the room to
+a what-not in the corner, and searched for something among a pile
+of magazines and pictures. The thought that she was making efforts
+to please him, tickled Matthew's vanity. While she was overhauling
+the pile, Mr. Whedell left his seat by Chiffield, and took the one
+just vacated by his daughter. Matthew received him with the
+diplomatic courtesy due to the parent of one's enchantress, and
+made a well-meant if not novel remark on the state of the weather.
+Mr. Whedell mildly disputed his proposition (whatever it was)--for
+Mr. W. was always disputatious on that subject--and then passed to
+the consideration of national politics. "The one topic natually
+suggests the other," said Mr. Whedell, "for they are equally
+variable." This was one of the father's few standard jokes; and
+Maltboy always laughed at it with the heartiness of a future
+son-in-law. They then grappled with the great theme in earnest.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="J_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>PULLING IN.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Clementina, having found what she sought, glided to the chair
+which her father had relinquished, and said, coquettishly, "Now I
+have come to entertain <i>you</i>, Mr. Chiffield. You were speaking
+of Niagara Falls, the other day. Here are some photographs of them,
+taken for me on the spot." She handed the pictures to Mr.
+Chiffield. That gentleman took them with a profound bow, glanced
+over them, and said, "How elegant!" "What rich scenery!" "How tasty
+they are got up, a'n't they?" "This is the showiest picture;"
+"Here's a neat one," &amp;c., &amp;c., &amp;c. Mr. Chiffield had
+contracted the use of a certain class of highly descriptive
+adjectives in selling dry goods. Clementina watched him narrowly,
+and thought how nicely she could manage this heavy fellow.</p>
+<p>"How many times have you been to the Falls?" she asked, when
+Chiffield had shuffled through the photographs twice.</p>
+<p>"Three times," said Chiffield, telling a white lie; for he had
+seen them at morning, noon, and evening on the same day. "And how
+often have you visited them, Miss Whedell?"</p>
+<p>"Oh! so often I can't remember. My last visit was early last
+autumn. Oh! pa, did we go to Niagara Falls before or after our trip
+to the White Mountains?"</p>
+<p>"After it, my child," replied the father, who maintained a
+cocked ear toward his child. "Don't you recollect we went from the
+Falls to Lake George, and stayed there till the first week in
+November? That was the year we omitted Newport and Saratoga, for a
+wonder," he added, conveying the idea, in a look to Mr. Chiffield,
+that such an omission was a marvel in their annual experiences.</p>
+<p>"You love the Falls, I suppose?" said Mr. Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"Oh! not much. I think they're dreadfully overrated." Clementina
+was determined not to be won too cheaply.</p>
+<p>"So I think," said Chiffield, delighted to speak his real
+sentiments this time; "though everybody is obliged to praise 'em,
+because that's the fashion."</p>
+<p>"But, though the Falls a'n't much, I must say the balls and hops
+are delightful. The fresh air there seems to give one strength to
+dance all night without a bit of fatigue. I bought these pictures
+because they show the hotels and other places where I have had such
+delicious dances."</p>
+<p>Chiffield execrated dancing, because he had large feet, and legs
+slightly bowed. He moved in the cotillon or waltz with a certain
+elephantine ponderousness and sagacity. Therefore she tantalized
+him with these reminiscences.</p>
+<p>"You see the Clifton House, there, on the Canada side? One night
+I danced eight waltzes, six polkas, four quadrilles, three fancy
+dances, and wound up, at five o'clock, with the German."</p>
+<p>"Wonderful!" observed Chiffield, not knowing what else to
+say.</p>
+<p>"Perhaps you think I was tired? Oh! not a particle. Next night
+we had a little hop on Table Rock. It was got up on short notice,
+but perfectly charming, I assure you. There were only two fiddles,
+and sometimes the noise of the Falls would almost drown the music.
+The fiddlers had to scrape so hard, that they gave out about three
+o'clock, and we had to give up the dancing, and go home, very much
+disappointed."</p>
+<p>"Unlucky, indeed!" interjected Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"But the next night we had two extra fiddlers. They relieved the
+other two at midnight, and then we danced till daybreak. Oh! such a
+glorious time. Next year, when I heard that a part of Table Rock
+had tumbled into the horrid river, I could have cried."</p>
+<p>"It was a great shame, indeed!" said Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"Isn't this view of Suspension Bridge natural?" she asked</p>
+<p>"Amazing!" said Chiffield; and he ventured to add that he
+considered that bridge to be a great triumph of human genius.</p>
+<p>"I dare say it is. But I didn't think of that. I was only going
+to tell you how the gentlemen of our Table Rock party tried to hire
+the use of the bridge one night to dance on. The owners wouldn't
+let it. Mean, weren't they?"</p>
+<p>"Contemptible!" replied Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"We should have had it nicely swept and lighted. The breeze
+coming down the river would have been beautiful, and the awful
+noise of the Falls wouldn't have been too loud for the music. But
+we almost made up for our disappointment. Next night, the gentlemen
+hired the 'Maid of the Mist'--the little steamboat, you know, that
+you see in this picture--and we sailed round and round below the
+Falls all night, dancing all the time. We went so near the Falls
+twice, that I got quite wet with the nasty spray, and caught cold;
+but that didn't prevent me from dancing all the next night, at the
+International. You have a good view of the house in this
+picture."</p>
+<p>"Tasty," said Chiffield.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell and Maltboy had not lost a word of this
+conversation, though they had been mutually boring each other with
+complex sentences about national politics. Happily, the discussion
+required no mental effort, and left them both free to hear and make
+mental comments on the dialogue that buzzed across the way.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell regretted that his daughter should expatiate with
+such vivacity upon a subject that must be extremely disagreeable to
+a gentleman of Mr. Chiffield's large figure and steady habits. To
+the cultivated judgment of Maltboy, it was evident that the young
+lady was trying to amuse Chiffield merely for the purpose of
+annoying him (Maltboy). Experience had taught Matthew the best kind
+of cure for this species of female perversity. He determined to
+leave the house, and thereby show that he was not to be trifled
+with.</p>
+<p>Availing himself of a pause in the dissertations on national
+politics, Maltboy pulled out his watch and consulted it. "Why!"
+said he; "nine o'clock! And I was to be in Fourteenth street by
+half past eight. Only intended to drop in just to see how you were.
+You really must excuse me, Mr. Whedell." Matthew rose as he spoke,
+to show that his mind was made up, and remonstrances would be
+useless.</p>
+<p>"Don't go. Put off your other call," ejaculated Mr. "Whedell, at
+the same time rising, and thereby indicating a perfect acquiescence
+in the departure of his guest.</p>
+<p>"You are in a hurry," said Miss Whedell, calmly, but without
+objection in voice or eye.</p>
+<p>Mr. Chiffield looked calmly at his rival; and none but a skilled
+student of physiognomy could have discovered a gleam of triumph in
+his dull, yellow face.</p>
+<p>Maltboy was disappointed in the calm demeanor of Miss Whedell;
+but, strong in his purpose, he walked toward the door, followed by
+the father. As he passed into the entry, he bowed coldly to the
+lady of his heart, and drew from her a scarcely perceptible
+nod.</p>
+<p>At this moment, a valuable thought occurred to the paternal
+Whedell.</p>
+<p>"My dear Maltboy," said he, closing the parlor door, "excuse the
+abruptness of the question; but could you lend me a couple of
+hundred?"</p>
+<p>The question was indeed abrupt, but not altogether unexpected.
+Mr. Quigg had apprised Maltboy of Mr. Whedell's financial weakness;
+but the infatuation of the ardent young bachelor had led him to
+disregard that warning. He was fully prepared to say, "Yes, with
+pleasure," and he did say so.</p>
+<p>"Thank you," said the gratified parent. "Only want it a few
+days." Mr. Whedell was too great an adept in the art of borrowing,
+to waste words of tedious explanation and gratitude, which only
+produce an impression that the borrower does not mean to pay. He
+accepted Maltboy's reply as a matter of course.</p>
+<p>"If not too much trouble, could you give me a check to-night?"
+asked Mr. Whedell. "Have a payment to make before bank hours
+to-morrow."</p>
+<p>"Most readily, my dear sir," replied the amiable Matthew. "Have
+you pen and paper convenient?"</p>
+<p>"In this room, Mr. Maltboy," said his host, ushering him into a
+little apartment at the end of the entry, which contained a few
+books, and was passed off upon a credulous world as Mr. Whedell's
+library. The gas was lighted, writing materials were produced, and,
+in less than three minutes, Matthew Maltboy had put his name at the
+bottom of a check on the ---- Bank, for two hundred dollars. He did
+so smiling, and with a full consciousness that he had sustained a
+dead loss to that extent. But he was always too good-natured to
+deny a friend; and, in this particular case, he felt that he was
+buying a perpetual free admission to the house, and a usufructuary
+interest in the fascinations of Clementina. The idea of marriage
+with that young lady had never occurred to him. He never troubled
+himself with problems of the future.</p>
+<p>"All right," said Mr. Whedell, folding up the check carelessly,
+and putting it in his pocket. "Shall I give you my note?"</p>
+<p>"Oh, no!" said the willing victim, blandly. "Hand it me any
+time, at your convenience."</p>
+<p>"Can return it within a week," responded Mr. Whedell; "but, on
+some accounts, the 1st of May will suit me best, if perfectly
+agreeable to you."</p>
+<p>"As you please."</p>
+<p>"We will call it the 1st of May, then. I regret you are in a
+hurry, sir. But remember, we are always happy to see you here."</p>
+<p>With this pleasant remark ringing in his ears, and fully
+compensating him for the loss of his two hundred dollars, Maltboy
+hastened home, but did not tell his friends of his adventure; but
+he smoked and mused over it agreeably, and was totally unmindful of
+the truth announced by Mr. Quigg on New Year's day, when speaking
+of this same Whedell, that "somehow debtors always give the cold
+shoulder to creditors, as if the creditors owed the money."</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell, left to his own society, flattered himself that he
+had turned a rejected lover to a good account, and entered his
+library and sat down in the cold, that he might not, by his
+presence, mar the harmonious progress of the courtship upon which
+so much depended, in the parlor.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="J_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>THE FIRST OF MAY.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Mr. Chiffield proposed, was accepted, and was married in a
+Broadway church about the middle of April. The affair was
+simplicity itself--bridesmaids, groomsmen, costly wedding costume,
+and the subsequent conventional reception at the bride's residence
+being dispensed with. The ceremony was witnessed only by the
+officiating minister, the sexton, the happy father, and about two
+hundred of the floating population of Broadway, including a number
+of pickpockets, one of whom sounded the recesses of the coat tails
+appertaining unto Mr. Whedell and his son-in-law, as they were
+coming out of church, and found nothing in them.</p>
+<p>The Siamese twins of the soul passed from the church amid the
+sneers, criticisms, and suppressed laughter of the spectators--who
+united in pronouncing the ceremony a shabby affair, not worth
+looking at--and, entering a carriage with Mr. Whedell, were driven
+to the New Jersey Railroad Depot furiously, as if they had been
+guilty of some crime against society. At the depot, Mr. Whedell
+kissed his daughter in public, and not without a touch of the
+melodrama, for which he had cherished a fondness in his earlier
+days, and wrung the hand of his son-in-law. The train bore the
+couple away toward the city of Washington, where a portion of that
+indefinite season known as the honeymoon was to be passed, amid
+every discomfort that money could purchase. Why they should have
+gone to Washington in pursuit of bad hotels, and other miseries,
+when they could have procured them in so many other parts of the
+country for a quarter of the money, was something which Mr.
+Chiffield was never able to explain to his own satisfaction.</p>
+<p>He afterward bitterly regretted that he had not made the nuptial
+trip to Newburg, or some place near the city, where the expenses
+would have been more moderate. But we anticipate.</p>
+<p>Mr. and Mrs. Chiffield had been absent ten days. They were
+expected home on the 28th day of April; but a letter from
+Clementina informed her father that she had taken a bad cold, was
+confined to her room, and could not return before the 1st of May.
+The brief note was written in a crabbed hand, and exhibited spots,
+which, if not lemon juice, were tears. She made no allusion to her
+husband, but wound up by saying, "Oh, pa! I am an unhappy
+girl!"</p>
+<p>This intelligence was a thorn in the bed of Mr. Whedell's
+comfort. Had he not arranged to settle with his creditors on the
+1st of May? Was not the owner of the house occupied and used by him
+to resume possession on that eventful day? And was not
+everything--even his daily food--dependent on the return of his
+children, as he fondly called them, with their pockets full of
+money? What if this infernal cold should keep them in Washington
+until after the 1st of May? As Mr. Whedell thought of himself,
+turned adrift, and a wanderer, he invariably tore out a few of the
+gray hairs which could be poorly spared from his venerable
+skull.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell had a deep and unchanging faith in his ill luck;
+but, this time, he was pleasantly disappointed. The morning train
+on the 1st of May brought back his children to him. They arrived
+just as those Bedouins of civilization--the New Yorkers--were
+beginning to indulge their nomadic propensities. The streets were
+full of wagons and drays laden with jingling stoves, rickety
+bedsteads, conspicuous crockery, and other damaged Penates, on the
+way to new domiciles. Fortunately, the owner of Mr. Whedell's
+residence had not yet come to claim possession. Creditors are early
+birds; but the hour--sis and a half A.M.--was even too early for
+them; and only one--Mr. Rickarts, the shoemaker--had called. He had
+been disposed of in the library, by the servant, under the pretence
+that Mr. Whedell was not yet up. But Mr. Whedell was up and dressed
+before six o'clock, and was watching for the expected carriage,
+through the window blinds of his apartment. He ran down to the door
+with juvenile briskness to receive the returning ones.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Chiffield looked pale and jaded. Her hair was carelessly
+arranged, and her bonnet awry--unerring indications of fathomless
+female misery. To the anxious inquiry by her parent after her
+health, she only replied, "Horrid!" Mr. Chiffield wore the aspect
+of a man who is disappointed in his just expectations. He gave a
+hearty grip to the proffered hand of his father-in-law, but he
+quarrelled with the driver over the fare, and abused him in an
+under tone, by way of relieving himself.</p>
+<p>"And how did you like Washington, my child?" said the fond
+father, in his tenderest voice.</p>
+<p>"I hate it!" said Mrs. Chiffield, hurrying into the house, as if
+she were running away from her husband.</p>
+<p>"Hum. Well, I'm not surprised that she dislikes the capital. I
+believe most visitors do. Clemmy seems to be a little nervous from
+travelling, eh?" Mr. Whedell addressed these remarks to his
+son-in-law.</p>
+<p>"Nervous? Perhaps she is just a trifle nervous, sir. All women
+are."</p>
+<p>"True--true! One of the peculiarities of the sex. Well, you have
+had a pleasant time, I trust?"</p>
+<p>"Pleasant time? Oh! yes--delightful! Your daughter is a charming
+girl, sir, and will make a most excellent wife." Mr. Chiffield
+spoke as if he were very much in earnest, but the expression of his
+face was not of rapture.</p>
+<p>"She is a treasure, sir--a perfect treasure!" replied the doting
+parent. "It cost me many pangs to part with her. I trust that we
+shall not be separated now. Why should we be? There are but three
+of us--just enough for a happy family." Mr. Whedell was hinting at
+a home under the future roof of his son-in-law.</p>
+<p>"I agree with you perfectly," said Mr. Chiffield, with
+unaffected eagerness. "Let us live together always. It will suit me
+exactly." He was thinking of free board and lodging at the house of
+his father-in-law.</p>
+<p>The couple shook hands, mutually pleased at the prospect, and
+beamed on each other.</p>
+<p>A part of this conversation took place in the hall, into which
+the hackman had borne the travellers' luggage. A pull was heard at
+the door bell--a loud, confident pull--which Mr. Whedell knew could
+be inflicted only by a creditor. It would not do to admit his
+son-in-law into his budget of family secrets just yet. So he
+said:</p>
+<p>"Now, Chiffield, you must need some rest. Let me not detain you,
+my dear fellow. Your room is on the first floor. I'll show it to
+you."</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell snatched a carpet bag out of the hand of his
+son-in-law, and hurried up stairs with him. Having turned that
+gentleman into the apartment reserved for him, and shut the door,
+Mr. Whedell paused at the head of the stairs, and listened for the
+developments below. The servant, after waiting for two or three
+more jerks at the bell, so as to be quite sure that it was the
+bell, went to the door, and there found Mr. Numble, the butcher,
+who supplied the Whedells with meat on the strength of the
+brownstone front.</p>
+<p>Pursuant to instructions, the servant explained that Mr. Whedell
+was not up, and asked him to walk into the library and wait a few
+minutes. Mr. Numble growled--as if he scented deception not far
+off--but allowed himself to be conducted into the library. There he
+discovered Mr. Rickarts, the shoemaker, taking down the few books
+which graced the shelves of the library, and evidently pricing them
+with an unpractised eye. The two gentlemen knew each other, and
+straightway engaged in a brisk dialogue about the weather.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="J_CHAPTER_V."></a>CHAPTER V.</h2>
+<h3>DEMOLITION OF CERTAIN AIR CASTLES.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The coast being clear, Mr. Whedell hastened down stairs to the
+front parlor, where his daughter had secluded herself immediately
+after her entrance into the house. She was lying back on the sofa,
+with her bonnet on, biting the ends of her gloves, and staring into
+space. She did not appear to observe her father.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell seated himself on the other end of the sofa, and
+reached out his hand, as if he would have taken his daughter's
+caressingly within it. If that was his intention, it was frustrated
+by her drawing the hand away. Then the father heaved a sigh, and
+said:</p>
+<p>"Ah, my child, I am so thankful that you have returned to-day.
+You will save us from ruin."</p>
+<p>"<i>I</i> save you from ruin!" said Mrs. Chiffield, in a hollow
+voice. "That's a good joke!"</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell grinned a ghastly smile, as if he did not precisely
+see the point of the jest. "Joke or no joke," said he, "I must look
+to you for some money to put off the infernal creditors, who have
+begun to flock into the house. There's the bell. Hang me, if it
+isn't another one! To come to the point, then, I wish you would
+loan me, say two hundred dollars. It is a small amount, but will
+stave them off a week or two."</p>
+<p>"Two hundred dollars!" Mrs. Chiffield opened her fine eyes in
+amazement.</p>
+<p>"That's all. Perhaps you have saved up the amount from your pin
+money? Or, if you have been a little extravagant, and spent it all,
+why, then, perhaps you can get it from Mr. Chiffield this
+morning?"</p>
+<p>The daughter laughed bitterly again. "I tell you, father," said
+she, "that this man is the meanest creature that walks OB two legs.
+He has not spent fifty dollars on both of us, during our absence.
+As for me, I have never got a cent from him, though I have dropped
+a thousand hints about new bonnets, dresses, and jewelry."</p>
+<p>"Gracious heavens!" cried Mr. Whedell, turning pale "But then,"
+he added, with an effort to laugh, "Mr. Chiffield is a business
+man, and was an old bachelor. He knows nothing of women's wants. It
+must be your mission to teach him what they are."</p>
+<p>"Pooh!" said the daughter; "I don't believe he has got any
+money."</p>
+<p>"Don't talk so, my child. You put me in a cold sweat."</p>
+<p>"Anyhow, I examined his pocket, last night, when he was asleep
+in the cars, and found only five dollars there."</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell's jaw dropped. "Oh, no! it can't be," said he, at
+length. "Mr. Chiffield must be a rich man. You remember his fine
+horses at Saratoga and Newport. You remember how much his society
+was courted by mammas with disposable daughters. They never
+patronize poor young men. Their instinct in finding out rich ones
+is unerring. And furthermore, Mr. Chiffield is a member of a firm
+twenty years old, who are marked 'A No. 1' on the books of a
+mercantile agency, that makes it a business to pry into other
+people's affairs. I paid ten dollars for the information, only a
+month ago. He must be rich! He must be rich!" Mr. Whedell repeated
+it twice, as if the repetition put the question of Chiffield's
+opulence beyond a doubt. "Ha! there goes that dreadful bell
+again!"</p>
+<p>"What you say may be true, but I don't believe a word of it,
+till I have the proofs," replied the daughter, who seemed to
+delight in taking a gloomy view of her case. "Why--will you believe
+it?--I can't get him even to talk about engaging a house in New
+York. He always dodges the subject, somehow. Upon my word, I think
+he expects to quarter on you for the balance of his life. That
+would be rich!"</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell raised his eyebrows, and emitted a doleful whistle.
+Reflecting, he said:</p>
+<p>"You may misjudge him. Perhaps he doesn't like to disturb Love's
+young dream, by looking into the future. That's all--I'm sure of
+it."</p>
+<p>"Humbug!" ejaculated Mrs. Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"Poor thing!" said her father, tenderly. "There--cheer up.
+Depend upon it, that you have got a rich husband, who will take all
+our troubles off our shoulders. Stay here, and I will go up stairs
+and sound him."</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell proceeded to the apartment where his son-in-law was
+shut up, and found that individual in a deep fit of meditation.</p>
+<p>"Thinking--and so soon after marriage?" said Mr. Whedell, with a
+charming smile.</p>
+<p>"Oh, yes; and I was thinking how much happier is a married man
+than a bachelor."</p>
+<p>"You will always think so, I am sure, with my dear Clemmy as
+your wife. My dear Clemmy! How naturally that phrase comes to my
+lips. And you are about to take her away. It's a foolish thought,
+but I hardly know how I shall live without her." Mr. Whedell
+paused, for effect, and contemplated the vermicular work in the
+carpet.</p>
+<p>"A happy thought strikes me," said Chiffield. "You have a house
+here, already furnished. Let us occupy it free of rent, and I will
+pay the housekeeping bills of the establishment. That will be
+mutually advantageous, and will especially suit your daughter, who,
+of course, has a child's attachment for home. What do you say to
+the proposition, respected father-in-law?"</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell did not catch at it with the alacrity that was
+expected of him. "A capital plan," said he, at length; "but,
+unfortunately, the house is not mine. I only lease it."</p>
+<p>Chiffield's lips puckered up. "That's curious," thought he. "The
+old fellow must have put his money into bonds and stocks. Well,
+they are the best-paying investments."</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell proceeded to break the news of his penniless
+condition to his son-in-law, gently. "Mr. Chiffield," said he, "as
+a wholesale dealer in dry goods, you must have observed, perhaps at
+times experienced, the fickleness of fortune."</p>
+<p>"Can he suspect?" thought Chiffield. "And what if he does? The
+truth cannot be concealed much longer. But I will pump him a little
+further before disclosing all."</p>
+<p>"Yes," said he; "our firm, like others, has had its ups and
+downs; but then, business would not be interesting without some
+little risks, you know."</p>
+<p>The easy manner of his son-in-law convinced Mr. Whedell that no
+"little risks" had shaken the firm of Upjack, Chiffield &amp; Co.
+"Ah, yes," said he. "Rich to-day, poor to-morrow--the history of
+the world. As every person may learn this by his own sad
+experience, some time or other, he ought to be lenient in judging
+of those who have become reduced from wealth to poverty."</p>
+<p>"Can he mean me?" thought the son-in-law. "Faith! it sounds very
+much like it. If so, his manner of broaching the subject is truly
+generous and delicate."</p>
+<p>"I agree with you," said he, aloud. "Money does not make the
+man." It is a safe adage, and Chiffield quoted it intrepidly.</p>
+<p>"True--true!" replied Mr. Whedell. "Money is but a small item in
+the sum of earthly happiness. Take the institution of marriage, for
+example. What gives to that institution its blessedness--love, or
+money?"</p>
+<p>"Love," responded the unhesitating Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"The promptness of that reply shows that he does not expect a
+fortune with Clemmy," thought Mr. Whedell.</p>
+<p>"He must suspect--perhaps already knows--the truth," thought
+Chiffield. "How kind in him to spare me the least humiliation!"</p>
+<p>"That person is truly rich," continued Mr. Whedell, "rich beyond
+expression, who brings pure love and exalted virtues into the
+married state."</p>
+<p>"Generous father-in-law!" thought Chiffield. "He knows that I am
+ruined. Yet how nobly he treats me! I may cast away all reserve
+now."</p>
+<p>"It would be an affectation, sir," said Chiffield, aloud, "to
+pretend that I do not understand to whom you refer, my dear
+father-in-law."</p>
+<p>"The glorious fellow!" thought Mr. Whedell. "He guesses what I
+am about to disclose, and yet calls me a dear father-in-law."</p>
+<p>Chiffield continued: "To save any further circumlocution, sir,
+and in order that we may fully understand each other, I will say at
+once, that we are completely--ruined!"</p>
+<p>"Ha! What! Who ruined?"</p>
+<p>"The house of Upjack, Chiffield &amp; Co. I--I thought you knew
+it."</p>
+<p>"Ruined, sir!" cried Mr. Whedell, livid with horror. He choked
+for further utterance.</p>
+<p>"Yes, sir," said Chiffield, who, being a fat man, was happily
+calm; "totally ruined."</p>
+<p>"You impudent scoundrel! out of this house!" shrieked Mr.
+Whedell, rising from his chair, and glaring like a wildcat at his
+son-in-law.</p>
+<p>"Be calm," said that phlegmatic individual. "I respect your
+age."</p>
+<p>"Curse your impudence! what do you mean by my age?" (approaching
+Chiffield in a threatening manner). "I'll let you know, sir, that I
+am young enough to kick a swindler like you into the street."</p>
+<p>"Pray compose yourself, sir," returned the bland Chiffield.
+"Your surprise and excitement are natural, and therefore
+pardonable. But my affairs are, after all, not quite as bad as they
+might be. I have a sure prospective fortune, if not a present
+one."</p>
+<p>"What do you mean, sir?" asked Mr. Whedell, not quite so savage
+as before.</p>
+<p>"That I have talents, energy, a large business acquaintance,"
+said the cheerful Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"Humbug!" roared Mr. Whedell. "What is all that stuff good for,
+without money?"</p>
+<p>"Not much, I admit," was the conciliatory reply. "There fore,
+sir, to come to the point at once, advance me ten thousand dollars
+to start in business again, and I will make a fortune in three
+years. It was the outside speculations of my partners that ruined
+me. Perhaps you don't know that dry goods are going up, sir? Now's
+the time to buy."</p>
+<p>"This man will drive me mad!" shrieked Mr. Whedell, combing his
+hair wildly with his hands.</p>
+<p>"Regard it in the light of a family investment," suggested the
+soothing Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"You diabolical scoundrel!" yelled Mr. Whedell, in a partial
+asphyxia of rage; "if I had a million dollars to-day, I wouldn't
+give you a cent. You should starve first. But I want to tell
+you--and hang me if it isn't a pleasure, too--that I am a beggar,
+sir--a beggar, sir--a beggar, sir! By noon to-day I shall be turned
+out of this house. And, by Jove! I'm glad of it, for then I shall
+get rid of you." During this <i>adagio</i> passage, the speaker
+shook his fist within a few inches of Chiffield's nose.</p>
+<p>The summery Chiffield answered, with a hearty laugh: "I see,"
+said he; "it's a regular sell on both sides. However, neither of us
+is worse off than he was, since neither of us had anything. As for
+me, I have gained one point, for I have a tolerably good-looking
+wife."</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell was about to retort in a vein of unmitigated
+ferocity, when Mrs. Chiffield, who had been listening in the entry,
+and could contain herself no longer, rushed into the room, and,
+brandishing a small clenched hand in the face of her laughing
+spouse, forcibly observed:</p>
+<p>"You sneaking, swindling, cheating, lying, black-hearted,
+ill-looking pauper, scoundrel, and vagabond!"</p>
+<p>"Very prettily said," remarked the imperturbable Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"You miserable thief!" continued his matrimonial partner, aiming
+a blow at him, which he playfully parried; "why didn't you tell me
+you were a beggar?"</p>
+<p>"Why? Because you didn't ask me. For that matter, why didn't you
+or your father tell me that <i>you</i> were beggars?"</p>
+<p>"I sha'n't answer your insulting questions, you mean, deceiving,
+ugly, ungentlemanly--" (no other epithet suggesting itself.) At
+this crisis, the infuriated wife burst into tears, and wished
+several times that she was dead.</p>
+<p>"Poor, dear wifey!" said the emollient Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"None of your 'poor dears' to my daughter, you jailbird!"
+screamed Mr. Whedell.</p>
+<p>"Now, don't get excited, father-in-law."</p>
+<p>"How dare you call me father-in-law, sir!"</p>
+<p>"Perhaps you prefer the more endearing epithet of 'poppy,'
+sir?"</p>
+<p>"Monster! will you leave my house?"</p>
+<p>"Have you any good old brandy on hand?" asked Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"Brandy! No. If you want brandy, sir, go to the d---l for
+it."</p>
+<p>"Not quite so far, thank you," retorted Chiffield the genial;
+"but I don't mind walking to the next corner for a smash."</p>
+<p>Chiffield rose, put on his hat, and stepped toward the door.</p>
+<p>"Good-by, wifey. I sha'n't be gone long."</p>
+<p>A growl, bisected by a sob, was the only reply.</p>
+<p>"By-by, poppy," said Chiffield, with a flippant wave of the
+hand.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell cast at him a look of scorn, to which justice could
+be done in no known language; and Chiffield, with a bow of
+exceeding grace, left father and child to their reflections.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="J_CHAPTER_VI."></a>CHAPTER VI.</h2>
+<h3>MR. WHEDEEL'S CREDITORS IN CONVENTION ASSEMBLED.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>These reflections, which were neither profitable nor interesting
+to the parties immediately concerned, were interrupted by a
+peculiarly rigorous pull at the door bell. Pulls of a startling
+description had come so often, the previous ten minutes, that Mr.
+Whedell had quite ceased to notice them. But this long and strong
+pull caused him to start, and remark, "It must be Quigg."</p>
+<p>It was Quigg, who had come to make his last appeal. He was by
+far the heaviest creditor. The unfortunate servant girl, acting
+under her general instructions, would fain have shown him into the
+parlor, where his fellow sufferers, having overrun the library and
+dining room, were already in strong force; but Quigg, having
+immense interests at stake, would stand no such nonsense.</p>
+<p>"Where is Whedell?" said he. "I can't dance attendance on him
+all day."</p>
+<p>It was always remarked that Quigg put off his slow and stately
+method of speech, when dealing with obstinate debtors.</p>
+<p>The terrified Mary lost her presence of mind, and replied; "In
+the first floor, front." Quigg mounted the stairs with surprising
+agility, and gave a hard rap at the door of the first floor
+front.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell said, in a voice calm with despair, "Come in." In
+the few minutes that had elapsed since the retirement of Chiffield,
+Mr. Whedell had privately determined to give up everything to his
+creditors, leaving them to divide the spoils among themselves, and
+then to go out, expend his last quarter on a dose of poison, and
+end his existence. This resolution, suddenly taken, imparted
+preternatural composure both to his mind and his face. He could now
+see his way out of all difficulties--or out of the world, which is
+the same thing. Clementina, who had not yet risen to that height of
+philosophy, buried her face in her hands, and sobbed with fresh
+violence.</p>
+<p>Quigg entered, and at a glance saw that he had lost. He stopped
+short in the bow that he was intending to make.</p>
+<p>"Well, Whedell," said he, roughly, "how are things to-day?" By
+"things," he always meant money.</p>
+<p>"Not a penny," said Mr. Whedell. "I've done my best to pay you,
+and failed."</p>
+<p>"Just as I expected. Serves me right. I never was forbearing
+with a debtor, that I didn't get chiselled this way. Strike me if I
+ever make the mistake again. This marriage of your daughter's,
+which was going to set you up in funds, has proved a fizzle, eh?
+Instead of taking somebody in, you have been taken in
+yourself."</p>
+<p>Quigg laughed; and then remembering that a delinquent debtor was
+before him, assumed his wonted serious aspect.</p>
+<p>At this allusion, poor Mrs. Chiffield burst into tears again.
+Mr. Whedell adroitly turned the circumstance to advantage. He
+pointed to her, and said, "There is my reply."</p>
+<p>Quigg felt that he was losing ground on these side issues.
+"Well, Whedell, we must have a settlement to day. You owe me one
+hundred and fifty dollars. Turn over all your furniture to me, and
+we'll call it square."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Chiffield doubled her sobs anew. But Mr. Whedell said,
+"Very good. Take everything, I shall want nothing where I am
+going."</p>
+<p>Quigg had been accustomed to these dark hints from contumacious
+debtors, and was not to be frightened. "I accept your offer," said
+he, "and will take everything."</p>
+<p>At this moment, a rush, as of many feet, was heard upon the
+stairs. The owners of the feet appeared to be literally tumbling up
+in their anxiety to get up. By the time Quigg could open the door,
+a half dozen flushed persons were ready to step in, and did so,
+brushing him aside. More than a score of others followed, and all
+plunged pell mell into the presence of Mr. Whedell and
+daughter.</p>
+<p>"Here we are, Mr. Whedell, by appintment," said the spokesman of
+the party, Rickarts, the shoemaker.</p>
+<p>"I see you are," responded the placid Whedell. "Take seats, if
+you can find them, gentlemen." This with a real smile, for he
+thought of the arsenic, and the immeasurable relief that it would
+afford him.</p>
+<p>"We don't want seats, Mr. Whedell; and, if we did, there isn't
+enough for all of us. We want our pay, and have got tired of
+waitin' down stairs for it. You put us all off to the 1st of May,
+you know, expecting you said, to raise money enough by the marriage
+of your daughter (excuse the remark, marm, but business is
+business) to pay off all of us. We found, on comparin' notes down
+stairs, this mornin', that you had told the same story to
+everybody. Now, sir, as your daughter is married, accordin' to the
+papers, and the 1st of May has arriv', will you be good enough to
+square up?"</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell smiled touchingly. "My good and patient friends,"
+said he, "nothing would give me greater pleasure--I might say,
+without exaggeration, rapture--than to pay all that I owe, with
+compound interest thrown in. But, unfortunately for my excellent
+intentions, I have no money."</p>
+<p>"Blast me if that isn't just what we expected! I told 'em, down
+stairs, that I'd bet ten to one you couldn't or wouldn't raise any
+think out of your son-in-law."</p>
+<p>"Your name is Rickarts, I believe?" asked Mr. Whedell.</p>
+<p>"Yes, Rickarts!" growled the owner of the appellation, "You
+ought to know it by this time; for I've dunned you often
+enough."</p>
+<p>"True, Mr. Rickarts, but then I have so many creditors, you see,
+that I cannot be expected to know them all. I merely wanted to
+observe, Mr. Rickarts, that, at least, <i>you</i> have not been
+disappointed in your expectations. Furthermore, that if you had
+made a bet of ten to one, it wouldn't have been a bad speculation
+for you."</p>
+<p>Cries of "Pshaw!" "Humbug!" "Swindled!" "Done for!" and kindred
+expressions, arose from all sides. The spokesman said: "We ha'n't
+got no time to joke, Mr. Whedell. We have only to remark, now, that
+the best thing for you to do is to give up your furniture, without
+the trouble and expense of a lot of lawsuits."</p>
+<p>"You are perfectly welcome to the whole of it, my good friends,"
+said Mr. Whedell.</p>
+<p>"The, deuce they are!" cried Quigg. "Why, you have just turned
+it over to me!"</p>
+<p>"I give it to all of you, singly and collectively, severally and
+jointly," responded the happy, melancholy man. "Divide it among
+yourselves, and leave me."</p>
+<p>The small creditors, under twenty dollars, took a favorable view
+of the proposition. One of them immediately jumped on a bureau
+having a marble top and elaborately carved legs, and expressed his
+willingness to take that for his pay. Another laid violent hands on
+the heavy yellow window curtains, and declared himself satisfied. A
+third commenced ripping up a corner of the carpet, and notified all
+persons that he claimed <i>that</i>. The original owner of the
+bureau, curtains, and carpet, who had furnished the house, and held
+an exalted rank among the principal creditors, objected to this
+summary disposition of the property. Quigg, in very emphatic but
+improper English, insisted that he had the largest and first claim,
+and warned everybody on their peril not to remove a thing from the
+house.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell reclined in his chair, positively enjoying the
+spectacle, which was all the more entertaining because the common
+wrath was now diverted from him. Mrs. Chiffield wept behind her
+handkerchief. Her bonnet was knocked on one side, and the flowers
+were seriously disarranged, indicating a real case of distress.</p>
+<p><i>Sauve qui peut</i> was now the motto among all the small
+creditors. Notwithstanding the energetic objections of Quigg and
+others, they rushed down stairs into the parlors, where the best
+furniture was kept, and commenced, taking possession. Rickarts, the
+shoemaker, seated himself on the top of the piano, and said he
+considered that his'n. But a second after, a man milliner, who had
+furnished two new bonnets to Miss Clementina on the strength of the
+brownstone front, took his seat on the other end of the piano, and
+gave Mr. Rickarts distinctly to understand that he was glued to it.
+The man milliner was a powerful fellow, and looked as if his proper
+vocation were hammering stone or rolling iron, instead of handling
+flowers and feathers. Rickarts murmured something inaudibly, at
+first but, on taking a second survey of his neighbor, concluded
+that he would be more desirable as an ally than as an enemy.</p>
+<p>"All right," said he; "s'pose we go snacks on this?"</p>
+<p>"Agreed," said the man milliner.</p>
+<p>Other of the minor creditors, not caring to quarrel for a third
+or fourth interest in the piano, attached themselves to movable
+pieces of furniture, such as ottomans, whatnots, etageres, and
+chairs. One succeeded in unscrewing a large chandelier which hung
+from the centre of the front parlor, and the gas came pouring
+through the opening in odorous volumes, while the spoliator waddled
+off to the door with his prize. Others rummaged the small stock of
+showy books which consituted the library, and were surprised to
+find that the most imposing volumes were bound in wood, with gilt
+backs, and contained nothing but air, which a funny creditor
+characterized as very light reading matter.</p>
+<p>In about five minutes, a considerable amount of portable
+property would have gone out of the house, but for Quigg's presence
+of mind. Seeing that decisive action was required, he slipped out
+of the front door, locked it, and returned in a moment with a
+couple of policemen, who chanced to be strolling through the street
+at that hour.</p>
+<p>On the way to the house, Mr. Quigg succeeded in persuading the
+policemen that it was necessary for the peace of society that they
+should turn all the other creditors out of the house, and leave Mr.
+Whedell's effects to be divided among them according to the regular
+legal process. As the officers marched up the steps of the house,
+it fell out that Matthew Maltboy came sauntering by. Observing the
+two officers, headed by an excited individual, going into Mr.
+Whedell's house, it occurred, to his benevolent heart that that
+gentleman must be in trouble. He also felt moved by a desire to
+hear of his old flame--for such she now seemed at the remote
+distance of six weeks,--of whose marriage with Mr. Chiffield he had
+read in the papers with the utmost complacency. Therefore, Maltboy
+stepped up behind the officers, and was about to follow them into
+the house. The officers would have kept him back; but Quigg
+recognized his friend of New Year's day, and asked him in, hoping
+to get legal advice for nothing.</p>
+<p>"An old friend of mine, and of Mr. Whedell's," said Quigg.
+"Admit him, officers. Perhaps, sir" (Quigg had forgotten his name),
+"you know something about Whedell's affairs, and, as a lawyer"
+(with a wink), "can tell me where he has some property snugly
+stowed away, that I can pounce on. If so, I would cheerfully let
+the smaller creditors divide the furniture among themselves. Any
+information--ahem!--will be confidential, you know."</p>
+<p>"I am not a shyster!" said the indignant Matthew, alluding, by
+that term, to the outlaws of his profession.</p>
+<p>Quigg was evidently surprised at this unfriendly repulse. "I
+only made the suggestion for you to think on. No offence meant.
+Please walk in, sir."</p>
+<p>The door being opened, several of the small creditors were
+discovered, grouped together, with property in their hands. They
+had made several ineffectual attempts to break the lock, or pry
+back the bolt. The larger creditors were forcibly remonstrating
+against this disposition of Mr. Whedell's effects; and a serious
+row would probably have ensued, but for the timely arrival of the
+police.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="J_CHAPTER_VII."></a>CHAPTER VII.</h2>
+<h3>DEUS EX MACHINA.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>One of the officers planted himself against the front door, and
+gave general notice that no one would be allowed to remove any of
+the furniture. The other officer stationed himself at the back
+door, to carry out a similar policy at that point.</p>
+<p>These manoeuvres caused consternation among the small creditors,
+and a vivid feeling of approval among the larger ones.</p>
+<p>"I am happy to announce," said Quigg, "that the counsel of Mr.
+Whedell--one of the most distinguished ornaments of the bar--has
+now arrived, and will take charge of his client's affairs. To those
+who know the name of--" (Aside) "By the way, your name escapes me
+at this moment."</p>
+<p>"Maltboy," said Matthew, a little flattered with this
+compliment.</p>
+<p>"I repeat, that, to those who know the name of Maltboy, no
+assurance need be given that Mr. Whedell's affairs will be
+honorably adjusted." Quigg again winked at the young lawyer.</p>
+<p>Matthew, having recovered from the flutter into which he was
+thrown, was about to disclaim the office thus thrust upon him, when
+the voice of Mr. Whedell was heard from the first landing. He had
+come to listen to the disturbance, and smile at it.</p>
+<p>"It is my dear Maltboy!" he exclaimed, catching at the straw of
+a hope. "Thank Heaven! he is here. Yes, gentlemen, he is my lawyer,
+and I refer you to him for the adjustment of all your claims. Come
+up, my dear Maltboy."</p>
+<p>"Oh! it is dear--good--Mr. Maltboy!" added a voice, qualified by
+sobs. "How kind of him--to--to come here at this time! Oh--ho!"</p>
+<p>Maltboy never could resist Beauty in any condition; and, for
+Beauty in tears, he would cheerfully lay down his life. He did not
+deny that he was the counsel and confidential adviser of Mr.
+Whedell, but rushed up stairs, just in time to receive the falling
+form of Mrs. Chiffield in his arms.</p>
+<p>Matthew felt that he had no moral right to clasp that burden of
+loveliness; but he took it tenderly in his arms, and followed Mr.
+Whedell into the room which father and daughter had just left.
+There he deposited it, with the gentleness of a professional nurse,
+on the sofa, when it opened its eyes, and faintly said, "Heaven
+bless you, our benefactor!"</p>
+<p>The creditors were pouring into the apartment. "In the name of
+humanity," said Mr. Whedell, "leave us for a few moments. I appeal
+to you as gentlemen and Christians."</p>
+<p>The appeal produced no effect; those to whom it was made
+conceiving, perhaps, that it did not apply to them. Maltboy added
+the remark: "If you will withdraw at once, I promise you that in
+fifteen minutes we will proceed to business."</p>
+<p>"That's all right," said Quigg, winking again at Matthew. "Let
+us go, friends."</p>
+<p>The proposition was accepted, as the best thing that could be
+done under the circumstances, and all the creditors retired.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell then locked the door, and proceeded to inform Mr.
+Maltboy of the black-hearted treachery of which he and his daughter
+had been the victims, in the Chiffield alliance. Clementina
+corroborated the paternal statement with numerous particulars,
+delivered in a heart-broken voice, showing what an abandoned wretch
+her husband was. Matthew listened, nodded his head, and said, "The
+brute!" and the "The monster!" at intervals, looking the while into
+the deep blue eyes of Mrs. Chiffield, which sparkled with tears.
+"If he had but been the lucky man!" he thought. But it suddenly
+occurred to Matthew that these thoughts were a little irregular;
+and, besides, he had a fresh recollection of the troubles from
+which Fayette Overtop had not yet emerged. He therefore pulled out
+his watch, and informed Mr. Whedell that thirteen of the fifteen
+minutes were consumed. The creditors were beginning to pace heavily
+in the entry.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell, taking the hint, came down to business. His affairs
+were of a kind that were easily settled. He owned nothing except
+his personal clothing, and a few small articles of furniture.
+Everything else had been obtained on credit, and either not paid
+for, or only partly paid for. This statement of affairs occupied
+one minute.</p>
+<p>A minute remained, which Mr. Whedell put to good use. He looked
+appealingly at Maltboy. So did Mrs. Chiffield.</p>
+<p>"My dear friend," said Mr. Whedell, "I find myself, at an
+advanced period of life, in this cold world, deserted, penniless.
+You are the only person living that I can call by the sacred name
+of friend. I have already experienced your noble bounty in a loan
+of two hundred dollars." (Tramps of creditors becoming louder
+outside.) "In a word, sir, can you lend me one hundred dollars
+more? It will at least save me from the self-destruction which I
+had contemplated."</p>
+<p>At the word "self-destruction," Mrs. Chiffield cried aloud, and
+threw herself on her parent's breast, with a fresh flood of
+tears.</p>
+<p>These tears swept away the last trace of Matthew's prudence. He
+whipped out his pocket book, and delivered over five twenty-dollar
+gold pieces to Mr. Whedell. The sight of those beautiful coins
+seemed to reconcile the wretched man to life.</p>
+<p>Mr. Whedell was about to thank his preserver most profusely, and
+Mrs. Chiffield to burst into a new torrent, when Matthew, to avoid
+these demonstrations, rose, opened the door, and let in the pack of
+hungry creditors.</p>
+<p>Now Matthew had, in these fleeting fifteen minutes, thought up
+no plan of settlement. Being taken aback by the sudden reappearance
+of the creditors, he did not know what to propose.</p>
+<p>"Everything fixed, I s'pose?" said Rickarts, the shoemaker.</p>
+<p>When Matthew was in strong doubt what to do in any case, it was
+his invariable custom to postpone. "I think," he feebly suggested,
+"that we had better postpone final action, say till three P.M. It
+would give us time--"</p>
+<p>"Can't come it!" "No go!" "Now, or never!" were some of the
+exclamations which went up from the excited crowd.</p>
+<p>Matthew was too good natured to quarrel with these insinuations.
+"My friends," said he, "as you appear to have unlimited confidence
+in each other, suppose you appoint a committee to dispose of this
+property, which my client generously" (cries of "Oh! oh!") "turns
+over to you, and divide the proceeds among yourselves <i>pro
+rata</i>"</p>
+<p>The creditors looked at each other suspiciously. A want of that
+childlike trust which, in a perfect state of society should exist
+between man and man, was unhappily too apparent.</p>
+<p>Just then, when Matthew was at his wits' end, the police man who
+guarded the front door entered the room, and delivered a note to
+Mr. Whedell. That gentleman perused it languidly, and passed it to
+Matthew.</p>
+<p>"Good news," said he. "Mr. Abernuckle, the owner of these
+premises, who was intending to move in to-day, writes that he will
+not be able to take possession until noon to-morrow. Therefore, I
+say, let the creditors employ an auctioneer, hang out the red flag,
+sell, and divide, before that period arrives."</p>
+<p>The large creditors were silent--Quigg veiling his
+dissatisfaction under a look of complete misanthropy--but the small
+ones, headed by Rickarts, the shoemaker, highly commended it.</p>
+<p>"Besides," added a butter man, who had originally been in the
+mock-auction line, "don't ye see, we can all stay at the auction,
+and kind o' bid on the things. Hey?" The butter man nodded at the
+lesser creditors.</p>
+<p>The idea took; only a few of the larger creditors holding out
+against it.</p>
+<p>"My friends," again observed Matthew, drawing on his stores of
+legal knowledge, "you seem to forget that, if my client chose to
+resist your claims, he could retain a large amount of furniture as
+household articles under the law, which exempts certain necessary
+things. But, with rare magnanimity, he gives up all."</p>
+<p>The allusion to magnanimity produced some derisive laughs, which
+slightly nettled Matthew.</p>
+<p>"Auction it off," said he, "or we throw ourselves back on our
+reserved rights."</p>
+<p>At this hint, everybody gave in; and a committee, consisting of
+Quigg, Rickarts, and the butter man, was appointed to make all the
+arrangements for an immediate sale.</p>
+<p>It is not pleasant to pursue this painful theme--the decline and
+fall of the Whedell household--farther. Let the historian barely
+record, that the sale attracted a large crowd, and that, by the
+ingenious side bids of the creditors, the furniture was run up to
+twice its original value (no uncommon thing at auctions); that the
+creditors, large and small, were well satisfied with the results;
+that Mr. Whedell and daughter moved to Boston, and became
+stipendiaries upon a younger brother, who had made a fortune in the
+upholstery business, and whom Mr. Whedell had always despised; that
+Mr. Chiffield took to drink tenaciously in consequence of his
+misfortunes, and never saw or sought after his wife from the day
+when he discovered that she was dowerless; that Mrs. Chiffield
+obtained a divorce from the bonds of matrimony, but had not married
+again at last accounts; and that Matthew Maltboy, Esq., on looking
+over the whole episode of his acquaintance with the Whedells
+thanked his stars that he had got out of their entanglements on the
+reasonable terms of three hundred dollars.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_ELEVENTH."></a>BOOK ELEVENTH.</h2>
+<h3>DISCOVERIES.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="K_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>THE OLD HOUSE REVISITED.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>In the month that followed the acquittal of Marcus Wilkeson,
+three real murders, a railway collision killing thirty persons, and
+a steamboat explosion almost as tragical in its results, occurred.
+The Minford affair was already getting old. Public curiosity,
+except in the immediate neighborhood of the house, no longer
+exercised itself upon the problem which all of Coroner Bullfast's
+powers of analysis had failed to solve.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson might have derived a selfish consolation from
+the fact that other mysteries and calamities were causing his name,
+which last month was on the tongue of the whole town, to be
+forgotten. But he had a nobler and truer source of consolation in
+his dear books. In the presence of the philosophers, and sages, and
+historians, and novelists, and poets, and wits, the men of genius
+of the past, chroniclers of the loss of empires, grave men who
+taught the vanity of life, and funny men who taught the same lesson
+in a different way, Marcus felt his pack of sorrows considerably
+lightening. His first, last, only disappointment in love had
+subsided into a gentle and not disagreeable melancholy. His trial,
+and the dreadful notoriety which his name had acquired, had
+imparted to his mild nature a gentle tinge of cynicism, which
+improved him.</p>
+<p>Marcus was sitting, one morning, in the little back parlor, idly
+turning over the leaves of an old folio, and looking with a half
+eye through the closed window at the houses opposite, and thinking
+what a deal of trouble it was possible to extract from a single
+block of buildings, when a slight rap was heard at the door.
+Simultaneously, the door was pushed open, and Wesley Tiffles shot
+in.</p>
+<p>He had brought all his tonical properties with him. Good nature
+and cheerfulness effervesced from his face. Through the trial, and
+since the acquittal, Wesley Tiffles had stuck to Marcus. Twice,
+often three times a day, he called, and was always welcomed by
+Marcus, and not inhospitably received by Miss Philomela Wilkeson.
+The interviews between that lady and the romantic speculator
+usually took place, quite by accident, in the entry, on the arrival
+or the departure of Mr. Tiffles; but, as it happened, not with the
+cognizance of Marcus.</p>
+<p>On one occasion--at the edge of evening--Marcus went into the
+entry a few minutes after Tiffles had left the room, and saw that
+gentleman and Philomela standing in the doorway. Tiffles appeared
+to be in the act of raising the lady's hand to kiss it; but, if
+that were his intention, he abandoned it on seeing Marcus, and
+shook the attenuated fingers instead. Then he coughed, and, saying
+"Good-night," went down the steps, as if he had not seen Marcus in
+the gloom. Miss Wilkeson coughed also (why do people always
+cough?), and, turning to her approaching brother, said it was a
+cool night, which was not true, as the night was agreeably warm.
+Marcus had never afterward seen them together, and had forgotten
+this slightly mysterious circumstance. Wesley Tiffles had, as
+usual, something enlivening to tell.</p>
+<p>"Got the funniest piece of news for you, my dear fellow!" said
+he.</p>
+<p>"Anything funny is always welcome, Tiffles," said he, closing
+his folio, that he might not appear to obstruct his friend's
+jocosity.</p>
+<p>"I've heard from that infernal old panorama--when I say
+infernal, of course I don't mean to imply that it wasn't a splendid
+idea, if I had had capital enough to see it through--and what do
+you s'pose the landlord and the other creditor have done with it?
+You couldn't guess in a month."</p>
+<p>"Well, what?" asked Marcus Wilkeson, laughing in
+anticipation.</p>
+<p>"Ha! ha! cut it up, and sold it for window curtains. A friend of
+mine, who passed through there the other day, says there's a
+picture of a lion, or a palm tree, or a slice of a
+desert--principally desert--hung up in every other window. And the
+best of it is, that they made a good thing of it. The curtains
+brought at least twice what I owed them. Great heavens! why didn't
+I think of it myself?"</p>
+<p>"Of what?"</p>
+<p>"Why, to cut up the panorama into window curtains, when Patching
+had finished it, and--ha! ha!--peddle them through the country. By
+Jupiter! that speculation may be worth trying yet. But at present I
+have my new patent process for----"</p>
+<p>Marcus coughed, and opened the book. Tiffles accepted the
+delicate hint in a spirit of true friendship, and let his new
+patent process drop.</p>
+<p>"Marcus," said he, "I don't wish to revive an unpleasant
+subject; but have you no idea what the late Mr. Minford was trying
+to invent?"</p>
+<p>"Not the least. I never trouble myself about inventions, as you
+well know, who are full of them. Besides, poor Mr. Minford was not
+communicative on that subject. He kept the secret even from his
+daughter."</p>
+<p>"You have a claim on the apparatus, whatever it is."</p>
+<p>"Yes. Mr. Minford insisted on giving me a paper to that effect,
+as security for two loans of five hundred dollars each. I took it
+to please the old gentleman." Marcus felt like groaning, as he
+thought of the sorrows that he had derived from his connection with
+the Minford family; but he had just been reading of the
+consolations of philosophy, and he stifled the rising weakness.</p>
+<p>"I have thought, Marcus, that there might be something about
+that unfinished machine that could be patented for the benefit of
+Miss Minford. You know I am a good judge of patentable things."</p>
+<p>"What do you propose, then?" asked Marcus, concealing, with an
+effort, the emotions which the mention of Miss Minford always
+caused."</p>
+<p>"That we go to the house together. The legal claim which you
+hold upon the machine entitles you to see it, if only to ascertain
+that it has not been stolen."</p>
+<p>"The visit you propose is a disagreeable one; but if you think
+there is a possibility of benefiting Miss Minford, I will go. Not
+that she is likely to be in want, however, at present, for I
+understand that a wealthy lady, Mrs. Crull, who befriended her at
+the inquest, you remember, has taken her to her own house."</p>
+<p>Without further words--for Marcus retained his old business
+habit of forming his conclusions suddenly, and adhering to
+them--the friends proceeded to the late residence of Mr.
+Minford.</p>
+<p>Marcus had not yet philosophically conquered his dread of
+recognition in the street as the man who had been suspected of a
+murder. He buttoned his overcoat up to his chin, pulled his hat
+over his brow, and walked fast. As he had purposely altered his
+style of dress since the inquest, he was not readily identified.
+But he was sympathetically conscious that several persons whom he
+passed, and who glanced at him, knew him, and that he was pointed
+out to others when his back was turned.</p>
+<p>Reaching the house, they hurried up stairs, hoping to run the
+gauntlet of the three floors in safety. Luckily, there had been a
+general move from the premises--the lodgings being less desirable
+since the supposed murder. The faces which thrust themselves out of
+the doorways as the two visitors passed, were strange ones.</p>
+<p>Marcus felt his heart palpitating, and his face growing pale, as
+they ascended the last flight of stairs, at the head of which were
+the room and the mystery. The lodgings had not been taken. The rent
+had been paid by Mr. Minford up to the 1st of May; and no person
+had been sufficiently charmed with the apartments to hire them
+since that date.</p>
+<p>Upon the door was a placard, announcing that the key could be
+obtained by application to the floor below. Tiffles went for it,
+and returned accompanied by an old woman, who looked as if she knew
+a great deal which she did not care to tell. She had been requested
+by the landlord to show the apartments to applicants, but not to
+whisper a word about the murder; and she was almost bursting with
+her great secret. While the old woman was wondering how much longer
+she would be able to hold in, Marcus and Tiffles entered the front
+room, and quietly closed the door in her face. The old woman
+grumbled at this discourtesy but, as she had a superstitious
+objection to putting her foot in a room where a murder had been
+committed, she leaned against the banisters of the stairs, and
+waited for the visitors' reappearance.</p>
+<p>The room looked just as it did on the day of the inquest. The
+faded and worn furniture was all there; the yellow curtains still
+covered the windows; the clock still hung against the wall,
+tickless. Marcus's eyes glanced restlessly about the room for a
+moment, not daring to look at the spot where the old man had
+received his death blow. But an inevitable magnetism soon brought
+his eyes to it, and his heart was lightened as he saw that the
+blood stains had been carefully wiped out.</p>
+<p>The door of the adjoining room--the maiden's bedchamber--was
+ajar. Marcus pushed it open with that slow motion which is a token
+of delicacy and respect. The general appearance of the room was
+unchanged, as well as Marcus could recollect from the occasional
+glimpses of it which he had formerly stolen. The little row of
+dresses which hung on pegs in a corner, and a few simple ornaments,
+might have been removed, but nothing more. Marcus felt that he was
+intruding here, and he closed the door.</p>
+<p>In the mean time, Wesley Tiffles had been examining the
+mysterious machine, which stood undisturbed in its corner, with the
+protecting screen still standing before it. Tiffles had first wiped
+off the dust, and then looked into it, and through it, and over it,
+and under it, with an eye that was predetermined to pry out a
+secret. Then he felt of every wheel, lever, cam, ratchet, drum, and
+other portion within reach of his fingers. Everything was
+immovable. Then he stood aloof from the machine, folded his arms,
+pursed up his lips, and cocked an eye at it, as if, by the mere
+force of intellect, he would compel the dumb thing to give up its
+mystery.</p>
+<p>As Tiffles was applying this species of exorcism in vain, Marcus
+came to his assistance.</p>
+<p>"What on earth can it be?" exclaimed Tiffles. "Not a new kind of
+steam engine; or an electrical apparatus; or a clock; or a sewing
+machine; or anything for spinning, carding, or weaving--nothing
+that is adapted to any useful labor. These heavy weights, that have
+fallen on the floor, would give the works a kind of jerky motion
+for a few seconds, while the weights were descending. Nothing more.
+But the ultimate purpose of the machine is a puzzler."</p>
+<p>"Mr. Minford always said that it was something that would
+revolutionize the world of industry--that it was a new mechanical
+principle of universal application."</p>
+<p>Tiffles laughed a little. "Excuse my levity," said he, "but
+inventors--and I am one of them, you know--always claim that they
+are about to revolutionize the world of industry. I never knew one
+of them to claim less than that for a patent flytrap or an improved
+sausage stuffer. Mr. Minford was a man of genius, I dare say, but
+he probably overestimated the importance of his invention. Have you
+any objection to my prying the thing apart at this opening? I want
+to inspect some of the works that are partly concealed. I pledge
+myself to put it together again as good as new."</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="K_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>A POSTHUMOUS SECRET.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>"Go ahead," said Marcus; and Tiffles, inserting his walking
+stick in a wide gap between two cog wheels, forced the strange
+machine apart. A large brass drum upon which a small chain was
+loosely coiled, fell to the floor. The other portions were not
+disturbed. Marcus picked up the drum; and Tiffles cast his unerring
+eye in among the new jumble of wheels and connecting levers that
+was brought to view.</p>
+<p>"Can't make head or tail of it," said he, at length. "Let me see
+that drum."</p>
+<p>Marcus handed it to him. Tiffles took it, like an expert,
+between a thumb and finger, and tapped it with his stick. It
+answered back with a muffled clink.</p>
+<p>"It is hollow, and contains some soft non-metallic substance.
+Ah! here we have it." And Tiffles, unscrewing a nicely fitting cap
+from the drum, drew out a close roll of paper. He unfolded it with
+trembling fingers.</p>
+<p>The upper portion of the paper was covered with neatly drawn
+diagrams, which bore some semblance to the machine. Beneath, in the
+fine copperplate hand of the inventor, were these memorable
+words:</p>
+<p>"<i>Eliphalet Minford's original plan of</i> PERPETUAL MOTION,
+<i>to which he has devoted his fortune, and twenty years of labor.
+Perseverantia vincit omnia</i>."</p>
+<p>"<i>Christmas Day</i>, 185-."</p>
+<p>Then followed a careful technical description of the plan, and a
+mention of the fact that on two occasions the machine had moved.
+One occasion was the night of April 10, 184-, when the mass of
+wheels started with a sudden click, but stopped in three seconds by
+the clock. The other occasion was daybreak, December 30, 185-, when
+the works began to move of their own accord, and did not stop for
+six seconds. This record had evidently been made by the inventor
+for his private reference, and concealed in the brass drum for safe
+keeping.</p>
+<p>Tiffles read with bated breath; and Marcus listened in
+astonishment.</p>
+<p>"What do you think of it?" asked Marcus.</p>
+<p>"I think," replied Tiffles, "with every respect for the memory
+of the inventor, that he was insane. Perpetual motion, without an
+exhaustive power--or, in other words, the eternal motion of a thing
+by its own inherent properties--is a simple impossibility. To cite
+familiar illustrations of its absurdity, you might as well try to
+lift yourself by the straps of your boots, or pour a quart into a
+pint pot. I wasted six months on perpetual motion when I was a boy,
+and gave it up. Every inventive genius bothers his head with this
+nonsensical problem, till he learns that he is a fool. Of course, I
+say this with every possible regard for your deceased friend. He
+was insane on this point--<i>quoad hoc</i>, as the lawyers have
+it--without question, or he would not have thrown away twenty years
+on it;--or twenty-three years, I should say, since the paper is
+dated, you observe, three years ago."</p>
+<p>"But Mr. Minford says, in that document, that the machine moved
+twice. He could have no object in deceiving himself."</p>
+<p>"You are wrong there, my friend. Inventors are continually
+deceiving themselves. Their judgment, their very eyesight becomes
+worthless in respect to subjects upon which they have labored long
+and hoped ardently. This machine has evidently been greatly altered
+from the original plan in the progress of its construction. You
+observe that these weights do not appear on the diagrams. They were
+an afterthought--recently put on, I should judge, from the
+appearance of the cords which hold them. Anybody can see, as I said
+before, that the weights would move the works spasmodically, so to
+speak. But this motion cannot be what he alludes to as having taken
+place on two occasions. Of course, I can't explain what caused the
+motion on those occasions--if it were a real motion, and not a
+fantasy of the inventor's brain--but I'll bet my life that any
+intelligent mechanic could have fully explained it to Mr. Minford
+at the time. But, mark you, Mr. Minford would never have accepted
+the explanation. Inventors never take advice."</p>
+<p>"So then you are satisfied that this machine is of no value--to
+Miss Minford--except for old brass?"</p>
+<p>"Oh! I don't say that. Mr. Minford, aside from this absurd
+crotchet, may have possessed real mechanical genius. Let me see if
+some part of it may not be good for something besides perpetual
+motion."</p>
+<p>Wesley Tiffles peered down among the brazen and steel
+complexities again. "Sure enough, here it is," said he; "a splendid
+window fastener."</p>
+<p>"I don't see any window fastener," exclaimed Marcus, looking in
+the direction of his friend's forefinger.</p>
+<p>"There--that cam with a small spring and lever attached.
+Strength and simplicity combined. I have studied the subject of
+window fasteners--in fact, have invented three or four, which
+possessed the extraordinary property of never letting the window up
+or down when you wanted to move it. I recognize, in this window
+fastener, my ideal. Marcus, you must patent it for Miss Minford. It
+will be a sure fortune to her. I'll make the drawings and
+specifications."</p>
+<p>Marcus, sadly happy in the thought of rendering any service to
+that young lady, readily chimed in with Tiffles's views, and said
+that the patent should be obtained as soon as might be.</p>
+<p>It was then agreed that Tiffles should call on Mrs. Crull, on
+the following day, and inform Miss Minford of the important
+discoveries which had been made by him--not mentioning the name of
+Marcus Wilkeson--and should also offer to remove and dispose of the
+neglected furniture, as the young lady might think best.</p>
+<p>As this conclusion was arrived at, the door opened suddenly. The
+old lady, being apprehensive, from the long stay of the two
+visitors, that they were ransacking the rooms and hiding portable
+articles about their persons, had overcome her superstitious
+antipathy, and opened the door quickly, so that she might catch
+them in the act. But they were only standing in the middle of the
+room, earnestly talking to each other.</p>
+<p>The old lady muttered an inaudible apology; and the two friends
+hastened to take their departure.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="K_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>OVERTOP FINDS A SENSIBLE WOMAN.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Next morning, Mr. Wesley Tiffles, after an inexpensive breakfast
+at a cheap restaurant in Chatham street, set out on his mission of
+goodness. He was reduced to his last dollar, but felt opulent in
+the possession of his diamond breastpin--that tower of moral
+strength to the borrower. He whistled as he walked, and thought
+what would be the best name for the new patent window fastener of
+the future. "Union," "American," "Columbian," "Peoples',"
+"Washington," "Ne Plus Ultra," and a score more, were turned over
+and rejected. Finally he settled upon the "Cosmopolitan Window
+Fastener," meaning that its destined field of usefulness was the
+whole civilized globe. Patents for it could be and should be
+obtained in England, France, Germany, Russia, and Spain.</p>
+<p>While Wesley Tiffles was taking this rosy view of the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener," he stumbled upon Fayette Overtop,
+Esq., who was walking briskly toward his office, and thinking over
+a hard case in which his services had been secured the day
+before.</p>
+<p>The firm of Overtop &amp; Maltboy had recently come into a small
+but paying business, in this way: The release of Marcus Wilkeson
+was generally supposed to have been effected, not by his innocence,
+but by the skilful and professional, but unprincipled efforts of
+his legal advisers. Their name was not unfavorably known among the
+thieves and murderers of the city; and several individuals
+belonging to those classes of society resolved to employ them when
+they got into their next little difficulty. And, since the inquest,
+another thing had greatly contributed to the prosperity of the
+firm. We allude to the case of Slapman <i>vs</i>. Slapman.</p>
+<p>This was an action for divorce, with alimony, brought by Mrs.
+Grazella Jigbee Slapman against her husband, Ferdinand P. Slapman.
+The ground upon which the separation was sought, was the continual
+brutality of Mr. Slapman toward his wife.</p>
+<p>It was the law and the custom, in cases where both parties to
+the action were agreed to that arrangement, to turn over this
+species of litigation to a referee, who took the testimony in
+private, heard arguments of counsel, and rendered a decision
+subject to the confirmation of the Supreme Court. The Court had
+issued a standing order prohibiting all persons from publishing
+(except with the consent of the parties to the action) any further
+reports of the cases than a simple announcement of the decree, as
+confirmed by the Court, for or against a divorce. This order was
+put forth to protect the public from the contaminating example of
+matrimonial infelicities; though we are not aware that the number
+of divorce cases has materially decreased, or the standard of
+public morality been greatly elevated in consequence thereof.</p>
+<p>The case of Slapman <i>vs</i>. Slapman was on trial before a
+referee, by mutual agreement of the parties. The newspapers did not
+report it; but some of them kept hinting at it in an appetizing
+way. The gentleman whose "gallantry, &amp;c.," was the "remote
+cause of the action," was described as "a rising young lawyer, who
+distinguished himself in a recent inquest before Coroner ----, the
+thrilling particulars of which are still fresh in the minds of our
+readers;" or as a "young ornament of the legal profession, whose
+office was not a hundred miles from the corner of Broadway and ----
+street" (the precise location of his office). One paper went so far
+as to say, that the "triumph which this disciple of Coke had
+achieved in the late <i>cause celebre</i>, was only to be equalled
+by his invariable success in affairs of the heart, &amp;c.,
+&amp;c."</p>
+<p>All this caused Fayette Overtop's name to be known by thousands
+of people. Persons who were seeking divorces, reasoned, strangely
+enough, that a man whose "gallantry, &amp;c.," was the cause of a
+divorce, could materially assist them in severing the matrimonial
+bonds. Therefore they began to flock to him. He already had five
+female and two male clients of this description.</p>
+<p>When Tiffles stumbled against Fayette Overtop, he at once
+invited his friend to go with him to Mrs. Crull's. His legal
+knowledge (of which Tiffles, in common with the public, was
+beginning to have a high opinion) might be of some service. Overtop
+had been told by Marcus Wilkeson of the previous day's
+transactions, and of Wesley Tiffles's intended visit to Miss
+Minford; and he at once consented to accompany him.</p>
+<p>On their way to Mrs. Crull's--whose residence had been
+ascertained from the Directory--they passed Miss Pillbody's select
+school. Tiffles suggested that it would be well to call on that
+young lady, and pick up some intelligence of Miss Minford. She
+might still be receiving lessons from Miss Pillbody; and might,
+possibly, be in the house at that moment. Overtop also thought it
+would not be a bad idea to call there. He had heard much from
+Marcus Wilkeson in praise of Miss Pillbody, especially of her
+sensible qualities. Being still in the active pursuit of a sensible
+woman, he was moved with a real curiosity to see her.</p>
+<p>The servant showed the two callers to the speckless little front
+parlor; and, a minute afterward, Miss Pillbody, looking fresh and
+neat, her narrow collar white and smooth, and every hair of her
+heavy brown tresses in its place, made her appearance.</p>
+<p>Miss Pillbody entered the room in that noiseless, sliding way,
+which indicates a constitutional diffidence. Her eyelids
+involuntarily contracted, so that she might see her callers on a
+near approach to them. Fayette Overtop, marking her modest demeanor
+and her short-sightedness, immediately announced his name and that
+of his companion, and the object of their visit.</p>
+<p>At the mention of his name, Miss Pillbody started. She had heard
+of Fayette Overtop, Esq., through the newspapers, as counsel for
+Marcus Wilkeson; but not as the philosophic friend of Mrs. Slapman.
+In reply to questions about Miss Minford, she stated that that
+interesting young pupil had not taken lessons from her since the
+death of her father.</p>
+<p>Miss Pillbody here indulged in a little artifice. She produced a
+memorandum book, to see when Miss Minford took her last lesson;
+and, in order that she might read distinctly, drew out her
+eyeglasses, and adjusted them with a graceful movement of the arm
+and hand. Overtop thought that she handled the eyeglasses in a most
+ladylike manner; and that, when they were astride of her shapely
+nose, they became her face wonderfully.</p>
+<p>When Miss Pillbody had referred to the little memorandum book,
+she gave one short look at Fayette Overtop. That gentleman,
+conscious that his face was scrutinized, looked at the wall. Miss
+Pillbody stole but one glance, and then shut the eyeglasses
+prettily, and stuck them into an invisible pocket of her waist. She
+had come to the conclusion that Mr. Overtop was a person of
+dignified and intelligent appearance. And Mr. Overtop had settled
+into the opinion that Miss Pillbody was a near approach to that
+imagined paragon--a sensible woman.</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop was about to make a shrewd remark upon the great
+superiority of private select schools over all public institutions
+for the education of young ladies, when Miss Pillbody rose.</p>
+<p>"Do you desire any other information, gentlemen?" said she.</p>
+<p>"No, I thank you, Miss Pillbody," returned Overtop, who
+interpreted her question to mean that a pupil was waiting for her
+somewhere--which was true; for Mrs. Gipscon, a fat lady of
+forty-eight, was taking her second grammar lesson in the back
+parlor.</p>
+<p>The two callers seized their hats.</p>
+<p>"Could I intrust you with a message for Miss Minford, Mr.
+Overtop?"</p>
+<p>"With a thousand," said that gallant man.</p>
+<p>"Please, then, give my love to her, and ask her to come round
+and see me."</p>
+<p>Mr. Overtop would have said that he always found it difficult to
+carry a lady's love to another without keeping some himself; but
+then he thought that this might be a little bold for a stray
+caller. So he answered, "With pleasure."</p>
+<p>The two visitors bowed, and Miss Pillbody bent her head
+gracefully toward Mr. Overtop.</p>
+<p>"What do you think of the schoolmarm?" asked Tiffles, when they
+had got into the street.</p>
+<p>Overtop did not like the phrase "schoolmarm." "I think Miss
+Pillbody," said he, "is--a sensible woman."</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="K_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>INNOCENCE ON A SLIPPERY ROAD.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Walking with the nervous and unreasonable quickness of city men,
+they soon arrived at Mrs. Grail's. The good lady was sitting at one
+of her front windows, sewing. As she looked into the street, her
+face was seen to have a sad and thoughtful expression. She came to
+the door in response to a sharp ring by Wesley Tiffles, who was
+tentative of bellpulls. Mrs. Crull kept two servants, but she could
+never get over the impulse to answer the door, when she was near
+it.</p>
+<p>Overtop explained that they were desirous of seeing Miss Minford
+on important business.</p>
+<p>"The poor, dear child!" exclaimed Mrs. Crull, in a broken voice.
+"She is not here."</p>
+<p>"Not here!" cried Overtop. "Where is she, then?"</p>
+<p>"I don't know, sir; and that's what troubles me so." Here the
+good Mrs. Crull began to twitch about the mouth. But she did not
+cry. She had too much of the masculine element for that. Her whole
+life was a struggle between the weakness of her feminine body and
+the strong self-control of her manly soul, in which the latter,
+after an effort, always came out victor.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull then proceeded to explain, a little incoherently,
+that she had taken Miss Minford to her house, the day after the
+murder, and had asked the poor child to live with her, to be her
+adopted daughter. Miss Minford had gladly accepted the offer, and
+had stayed there until yesterday. During the last two or three
+days, she had noticed that Miss Minford, or Pet, as she always
+called her, was worried about something. She would not tell Mrs.
+Crull what was the matter, but Mrs. Crull somehow guessed that it
+was a love affair. She remembered the handsome, dissipated young
+man at the inquest, and she had seen him standing at the corner
+below her house, only two days before Miss Minford left.</p>
+<p>"Left!" exclaimed Overtop, jumping at a conclusion. "Then that
+villain has abducted and ruined her."</p>
+<p>"It's bad enough, I fear," continued Mrs. Crull; "but perhaps
+not so bad as that 'ere. Anyhow, I hopes not. I spoke to Pet about
+that young man, and she looked as innocent as a spring lamb at me,
+though she kind o' blushed when she denied having met him since the
+trial. And, to do her justice, I don't think she had met him then,
+though I sort o' suspeck she seen him from the window two or three
+times--she had a habit of looking out o' the window--and that he
+contrived to have a talk with her somewhere and somehow, the day
+before she went away. And I think he must have had the cheek to
+come into this very room" (Mrs. Crull had shown her visitors into
+her front parlor), "because one o' my servants says that she heerd
+a strange voice in the entry, and the door shut as if somebody had
+gone out. When she come into the entry to see who it was, she saw
+Pet hurrying into the parlor, and heerd her humming a tune. Pet
+wasn't in the habit of humming tunes; and, the servant thought that
+rather 'spicious. So do I--not of any wrong, mind you. I wouldn't
+believe that till it was proved. But, to make a long story short,
+here is the note that poor Pet left on my dressin' table. Read it.
+I--I haven't got my spectacles."</p>
+<p>The truth was, that Mrs. Crull's eyes were filling with tears,
+and she could not have read the now familiar lines on that little
+piece of paper even with the powerful aid of her spectacles.</p>
+<blockquote>Monday Evening.<br>
+DEAR MRS. CRULL:<br>
+<br>
+Please pardon me for what I have done. I knew you would not
+consent to it, and so I did not tell you. I was afraid I should
+become a burden to you; though you are too good-hearted to say so.
+I have a nice place, and am earning my own living honestly. Do not
+try to find me, but believe I will always be good, and worthy of
+your love, and, some day, will repay you for all your kindness.<br>
+<br>
+With love and respect,<br>
+PATTY MINFORD.</blockquote>
+<p>"A very strange note!" murmured Overtop. "Young girls are not
+apt to complain of being burdens, or to take such misanthropic
+views of life. There is a man's hand in this. That wretch, Van
+Quintem, jr., without a doubt. Did you never warn Miss Minford
+against him?"</p>
+<p>"Once," said Mrs. Crull, with a faint choke in her voice. "I had
+noticed his glances toward her at the inquest, and I told her he
+was a bad young man, and she must not allow him to speak to her in
+the street, and that, if he should come to my house to see her, I
+should shut the door in his face."</p>
+<p>"And what did she say to that?"</p>
+<p>"She said all she knew about him was, that he had saved her life
+once. She couldn't forget that. Then I showed her how improper it
+was in him to hide his own name from her, and what horrid holes
+these gambling dens was which he goes to. I also p'inted out how
+unfeelin' his conduct was to his poor old father."</p>
+<p>"And what did she say to all that?"</p>
+<p>"She nodded her head, and said, 'Yes, so it was;' but I see,
+now, that all my talk didn't make no impression on her."</p>
+<p>"The sum of it is," said Overtop, "that she loves this worthless
+vagabond, and knew that you would not permit his visits to your
+house. Therefore she has left you."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull was a woman of firmness as well as affection. She
+regretted that her opposition to this young man should have been
+the means of driving Pet away. But she knew that she had done what
+any prudent mother would have done for her own child.</p>
+<p>"I'm sorry it has come to this," said she; "but I did it all for
+the best, Heaven knows. Gen'lemen, we must find this child. But
+how?"</p>
+<p>Tiffles, being a man of infinite expedients, and accustomed to
+solve problems for himself, and everybody else, at the shortest
+notice, answered at once:</p>
+<p>"<i>Not</i> by advertising for her, or putting the police on her
+track. Young Van Quintem would take the alarm, and move her out of
+town. She will go anywhere with him, if I mistake not, until she
+finds him out better. Have you no clue to her whereabouts; or can
+you think of any one that could give us any information?"</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull reflected. "Unless I am much mistaken," said she, "I
+saw that tall, clean-looking boy, Bog, I believe they call him--you
+remember him at the inquest--walking on t'other side o' the street,
+two or three times since Pet come to live with me. He looked
+sideways and kind o' sheepish at the house as he passed. I've a
+notion that he was a lover of Pet's, too."</p>
+<p>"He's the man, or boy, for us!" cried Tiffles. "Is in the
+bill-posting business, and knows the town better than I do, if
+anything. A shrewd fellow, judging from his looks; and, if he's in
+love with Miss Minford, then he's sure never to tire of hunting her
+up. He must disguise himself, and find young Van Quintem, and
+follow him day and night, till he brings up at Miss Minford. That's
+the shortest road. When Miss Minford has been found, then we will
+consider what is to be done next."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull and Overtop at once approved of this plan, and no
+time was lost in putting it into execution.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="K_CHAPTER_V."></a>CHAPTER V.</h2>
+<h3>BOG'S OPEN SESAME.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Bog was easily found, and gladly consented to do the work
+allotted to him. It was agreed that he should conduct the search
+alone, and in his own way; but that, after he had succeeded in
+tracing Miss Minford to her place of concealment, he should send
+word, without delay, to Mrs. Crull, and also to old Van Quintem,
+whose advice upon the subject had been obtained. It was thought
+that the reasoning and entreaties of the two together would win
+back the poor girl from the path of danger which she was
+unconsciously treading.</p>
+<p>Bog disguised himself by putting on his old, discarded working
+clothes; and, as he looked at his reflection in the glass, thought
+how much truth there was in the maxim, that "fine feathers make
+fine birds."</p>
+<p>"Go, my good boy," old Van Quintem had said to him, in faltering
+accents; "go among the gambling houses, and other dens of infamy,
+and you will surely hear of my son."</p>
+<p>Acting on this advice--which confirmed his own opinion--Bog
+proceeded to visit the gambling houses on Broadway. Child of the
+city as he was, he knew the locations of them all. His constant
+travels about town, day and night, had made him a master of all
+this knowledge, and much more of the sort, which is only useful
+when, as in the case of this poor orphan boy, it serves to show
+where evil must be avoided, not sought. Thus the pilot, taking his
+vessel through Hellgate, profits by his knowledge of the rocks and
+the shallows, to steer clear of all dangers, and come safely into
+port.</p>
+<p>Bog, before leaving his shop, had been provided with this decoy
+note, written by the ingenious Wesley Tiffles in cunning imitation
+of Miss Minford's handwriting. The long, elegant curves, and all
+the delicate peculiarities of her chirography, taught by Miss
+Pillbody, had been copied from the sample furnished by her note to
+Mrs. Crull. It ran as follows:</p>
+<blockquote>MR. VAN QUINTEM:<br>
+<br>
+DEAR SIR: Come to me at once, for I am in trouble.<br>
+<br>
+PET.</blockquote>
+<p>The plan (Bog's contrivance all this) was to inquire at the
+gambling houses where Mr. Van Quintem, jr., was most likely to be,
+and, when he was found, to send this note in to him by a servant.
+Bog, having delivered the note, was to withdraw to the sidewalk,
+lie in ambush, till young Van Quintem came out, and then follow him
+to Miss Minford's retreat. There he was to wait, and send a swift
+messenger to Mrs. Crull and old Van Quintem. It was not known that
+young Van Quintem had ever seen Miss Minford's handwriting; but, to
+make the game sure, the note had been written with a skill worthy
+of a counterfeiter, or that most dexterous of penmen, young Van
+Quintem himself.</p>
+<p>Bog commenced operations about three o'clock in the
+afternoon--the hour when the gambler and debauchee, who have been
+up all the previous night, are ready to begin their feverish life
+again.</p>
+<p>He first visited a snug establishment near the lower end of
+Broadway. It was situated in the second story, over a nominal
+exchange office, and was the favorite resort of down-town brokers,
+who, having gambled on Wall street till the close of business
+hours, dropped in to flirt with Fortune an hour or two before going
+home to dinner. Sometimes their hour or two was protracted to six
+o'clock next morning, when they staggered home to breakfast and a
+curtain lecture together. This Temple of Faro was never
+impertinently molested by the police; and it was a subject of
+remark, among people who thought they had been robbed there, that
+there was never a policeman within sight of the door.</p>
+<p>In the hallway of the second story occupied by this gambling
+saloon, were a number of doors, which the experienced eye of the
+boy at once decided to be blinds, or, in other words, no doors at
+all, but only imitations. The appearance of the second story was
+that of a suite of unoccupied offices. Whoever rapped at these
+blind doors, could obtain no admission.</p>
+<p>At the end of the hallway, Bog came upon a long window, which
+was painted white on the inside. He saw, by a glance at the grooves
+of the lower sash, that it was often raised. There was a boot-worn
+hollow on the floor beneath the window. The unusual length of the
+lower sash, and the nearness of the sill to the floor, would permit
+persons to step into the room easily when the window was
+raised.</p>
+<p>Bog rapped thrice at this window. He had a vague idea--derived
+from reading, perhaps--that three raps were an open sesame to
+mysterious rooms the world over. The last rap had not ceased to
+vibrate on the pane of glass, when the window was suddenly shoved
+up, as if by somebody waiting on the other side.</p>
+<p>A negro of intense blackness stood revealed. He took a hasty
+inventory of Bog's old clothes, and then said, "Clare out, now!" He
+commenced to close the window.</p>
+<p>"I was told to give you a half dollar," said Bog, bethinking
+himself of a powerful expedient, "if you would find out whether Mr.
+Van Quintem was here, and hand him a letter."</p>
+<p>The negro's eyes dilated, and his thick lips wreathed into a
+grin.</p>
+<p>"Mr. Fan Squintem--a little feller with a big black mustache? I
+knows him. Dunno wether he's in, 'L see fur ye." The negro paused.
+The interrogatory, "Where's your half dollar?" could be plainly
+seen in his great eyes.</p>
+<p>"Here it is," said Bog.</p>
+<p>The negro grinned his satisfaction, pocketed the coin,
+disappeared through another door from which there exhaled an odor
+of cigars and mint juleps, and returned, in a minute, with the
+intelligence, "He a'n't in, Mister. P'a'ps you want to leave some
+word for him?"</p>
+<p>Bog had no time to lose. He said, "Nothing partickler," and
+hurried off, leaving the negro to puzzle over his half dollar.</p>
+<p>At the next gambling saloon, near the junction of Broadway and
+Park Row, Bog simplified his method of operations. Before making
+any inquiry of the servant who answered his triple rap, he thrust a
+half dollar at him, and then put his question. This plan saved
+surly looks and explanations. Mr. Van Quintem was a well-known
+patron of the establishment, but had not been there for a week:
+which was rather strange, the man politely added.</p>
+<p>Bog continued his search, walking as fast as he could. In second
+stories, in third stories, in fourth stories, in the rear of ground
+floors, in one or two basements, among all the more fashionable
+gambling dens, which, at that period, lay between Fulton and Tenth
+streets, he picked his way. His new system had drawn heavily upon
+his stock of loose silver, and he had but two half dollars left.
+The question now was, how to spend them?--for Bog knew of no more
+resorts of gamblers on Broadway; and there were none on any of the
+side streets which a man of young Van Quintem's style would be
+likely to frequent. It was the edge of evening.</p>
+<p>The boy walked up and down between Tenth and Fourteenth streets,
+thinking what it would be best to do next. He kept a sharp lookout
+at the passers by, hoping to see the object of his search. He
+paused to rest himself a few minutes in the doorway of a
+photographic gallery; and, while there, observed two young men,
+with sickly complexions and bloodshot eyes, coming up the street.
+He recognized them as young men whom he had often seen issuing from
+gambling places in the small hours of the morning. They were
+talking briskly, and Bog pricked up his ears.</p>
+<p>"The very d----l's in the cards lately," said the whitest-faced
+of the two.</p>
+<p>"Luck must have a turn," said the other. "By ----" (with a
+horrid oath), "suppose we try Van's?"</p>
+<p>"Van's? Where's that?"</p>
+<p>"Why, the concern just opened on the corner above. The biggest
+kind of suppers there, they say."</p>
+<p>"All right," said the other, wearily. "We'll try Van's."</p>
+<p>Van is a common prefix of names in New York; but Bog needed no
+further assurance that this Van belonged to Quintem. The opening of
+a new gambling saloon under his name (with some wealthy backer
+furnishing the capital, as is usually the case) would explain why
+young Van Quintem had not been seen at any of his old haunts on
+Broadway for a fortnight past.</p>
+<p>Bog followed his guides at a short distance. After proceeding
+two squares, they stopped in front of a stylish old mansion, and,
+after a furtive look up and down and across the street, ascended
+the steps, and opened the door. As they did so, Bog swiftly passed
+the house, and saw that a muscular servant stood within the entry,
+for the obvious purpose of preventing the intrusion of persons not
+wanted there. The large diamond breastpins and depraved faces of
+the two young men were their passports, and were
+<i>vis&eacute;d</i> without hesitation by the diplomatic
+attendant.</p>
+<p>Bog took a half dollar in his hand, advanced to the door, which
+was now closed, and boldly opened it.</p>
+<p>The athletic guardian of the place, being confronted with this
+audacious youth in old clothes, put on a commanding look, and
+said:</p>
+<p>"Well, sir, and what the d----l do you want here?"</p>
+<p>"Only to give you half a dollar, as I was told to," said Bog,
+"and to ask if Mr. Van Quintem was in. Note from a lady, sir;
+that's all." Bog winked.</p>
+<p>The servant smiled, and took the coin.</p>
+<p>"He's in," was the reply.</p>
+<p>"Then please hand this to him, and say as how it's 'mportant. No
+arnser wanted."</p>
+<p>The servant received the note, and sententiously remarked,
+"Consider it done;" whereon the boy Bog hurriedly retreated, and
+hid himself in a doorway nearly opposite. He had hardly done this,
+before the door of the house opened again, and disclosed the man
+whom he longed to see. The letter was crumpled in his hand, and his
+pale face betrayed agitation. He cast wary looks in all directions,
+and then descended to the sidewalk, and walked fast down Broadway.
+Bog emerged from his seclusion, and followed him at a distance,
+always keeping somebody between him and the object of his
+pursuit.</p>
+<p>At the corner of Astor Place, young Van Quintem stopped; and Bog
+came to a halt also, half a block behind.</p>
+<p>The next minute, the Eighth-street stage, going up, approached
+the corner at a rapid rate, as if the driver were hurrying home to
+his supper. There were but few persons in the stage.</p>
+<p>Young Van Quintem hailed the conveyance, jumped in before it
+could stop, and the driver whipped up his horses to an increased
+speed. Bog was tired, and he knew not how far he might have to
+follow the stage at a full trot. He resolved upon his course
+instantly. Turning the corner of Clinton Place, he ran up that side
+of the triangular block, and met the stage. He pulled his old cap
+farther over his eyes, to prevent the possibility of recognition by
+young Van Quintem, and, gliding swiftly behind the stage, when he
+was sure that the driver was not looking, hooked on to the step
+behind, just as he had done a thousand times when he was a smaller
+boy.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="K_CHAPTER_VI."></a>CHAPTER VI.</h2>
+<h3>TRACKED.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Young Van Quintem sat at the farther end of the stage, absorbed
+in his own thoughts. His thin lips moved restlessly at times, as if
+he were arguing to himself. In his hand he still held the crumpled
+note. Twice he unfolded it, and read the contents carefully; then
+crushed it in his hand again. Bog watched him through the window of
+the stage door--not looking straight at him, but with that side
+vision with which we trace the outline of faint comets. He was
+aware that young Van Quintem looked at him twice suspiciously, and
+then settled back into his own meditations. Bog felt safe in his
+disguise--or rather his original and native dress.</p>
+<p>When the stage stopped to take in or let out passengers, Bog
+slipped from his perch, and hid himself from the driver's sight.
+Long experience had taught him how to render himself invisible to
+that vindictive personage.</p>
+<p>The stage rolled on to the Greenpoint ferry, dropping all its
+passengers by the way, excepting the pursued and the pursuer. It
+was now evident that young Van Quintem was going to Greenpoint.</p>
+<p>The ferry boat was not in, and would not be in, and ready to
+leave again, for ten minutes. Bog, having seen his game enter the
+ferry house, thereby conclusively proving his intention to cross
+the river, slipped into a boiler yard near the ferry. There,
+against a post, he scrawled with a stump of pencil, on the back of
+two playbills (which he had brought with him for stationery), two
+notes, as follows:</p>
+<blockquote>Tuesday Evening, about 8 o'clock.<br>
+<br>
+Please come to the ferry house on the Greenpoint side, and wait
+there till I send for you. BOG.</blockquote>
+<p>These notes he addressed to Mr. Van Quintem, sen., and Mrs.
+Crull, at their residences. The next step was to find a boy to
+deliver them. Bog did not have to wait long for that. Boys of the
+ragged and city-wise variety may be picked up at any corner of New
+York at any hour of the day or night.</p>
+<p>Another Eighth-street stage, which came rattling toward the
+ferry, brought a fine specimen of the juvenile vagrant and
+dare-devil, seated on the step. Bog looked out of the boiler yard,
+and hailed him with a shrill whistle, formed by thrusting two
+fingers in the mouth, and blowing fiercely. The boy recognized the
+signal of his ragged tribe, slid off the seat, and came running to
+where Bog was standing. As he drew near, Bog recognized him as a
+trusty lad whom he had employed as file leader in a walking
+advertisement procession, several weeks before.</p>
+<p>"Wot yer want, hey?" asked this youth.</p>
+<p>"Know me?" asked Bog.</p>
+<p>"Know ye? No. Yer a'n't one of our fellers."</p>
+<p>"Look again." Bog raised his ragged cap, and smoothed his hair
+back.</p>
+<p>"Why, it's Mr. Bogert. Cuss me if it a'n't!"</p>
+<p>"Just so, Bill. I'm trying to catch a chap that owes me
+something, you see. He's in the ferry house there, waiting for the
+boat. I'm going to follow him to Greenpoint, and find out where he
+lives. Then I'll have him arrested. Now, there are two people I
+would like to have as witnesses, when I track him to his house. The
+names are written here; and what I want of you is, to deliver these
+notes to them as soon as you can, and tell them to come right away.
+Will you do it, Bill?"</p>
+<p>"Won't I, Mr. Bogert? Jest tell me the names, streets, and
+numbers, cos I can't read handwritin' very well, yer know."</p>
+<p>Bog read the addresses, and, at the same time, produced a
+quarter from his fast-diminishing stock of silver. "Take that,"
+said he.</p>
+<p>"No yer don't!" said the eccentric youth. "You've done some good
+turns to me. Bill Fish don't forget his friends, I can tell yer.
+Here goes, now."</p>
+<p>Bill Fish snatched the notes from Bog's hand, and ran down the
+street after a stage which had just left the ferry house on its
+down trip. Bog saw him seat himself on the step, with his head well
+hid from the driver, and sent a parting whistle after him, to which
+Bill Fish responded with an enormous grin and a jerk of thumb over
+shoulder at his natural enemy on the box.</p>
+<p>"I'll give Bill Fish a good job, some day," mused Bog. "Now for
+the scoundrel."</p>
+<p>The boat had come in. Bog watched from his hiding place until he
+saw young Van Quintem step on board, and disappear in the ladies'
+cabin. Then he hastened to the ferry house, paid his fare, and
+entered. To avoid being seen by young Van Quintem, he took a seat
+in that repository of stale tobacco-smoke called the "Gentlemen's
+Cabin."</p>
+<p>At the Greenpoint landing, Bog watched young Van Quintem's
+departure from the boat, and stole out, taking the opposite side of
+the street. It was then quite dark, and, with reasonable
+precaution, there was no fear that the pursued would see him.</p>
+<p>The young profligate walked up the street several blocks, and
+turned into a side street, occupied by residences, with small shops
+and groceries at the corners, and occasionally at intervals between
+them. Suddenly, Bog observed him looking around, as if to be sure
+that he was not watched. Bog slipped behind a large tree. Having
+apparently come to the conclusion that nobody was observing him,
+young Van Quintem strode on rapidly a few rods farther, and then
+made a sharp turn into a neat little millinery shop, which stood
+quite remote from all other places of business.</p>
+<p>When the young man's form had disappeared, Bog ran at the top of
+his speed to a point opposite the shop, where he could readily see
+what was going on within.</p>
+<p>The door was open and a strong light from the interior shone
+across the street. There was no tree or awning post, or other
+object, on the sidewalk, behind which he could conceal himself.
+Exactly opposite to the shop, and in the full blaze of its light,
+was a high door shutting on a small alley way. Bog tried the latch,
+and found the door locked. With instant decision, he caught the top
+of the door, and vaulted over it, trusting to fortune not to be
+caught on the inside. Applying his eye to the keyhole, he observed
+the following condition of things:</p>
+<p>The shop was a milliner's, beyond all question. It was filled
+with articles of ladies' wear, whose names and uses were all
+unknown to Bog; while outside, in the air, dangled various patterns
+of skirts which had just then come into fashion; and the public and
+obtrusive exhibition of which is one of the singularities of our
+rapid civilization.</p>
+<p>Behind the counter stood one of those thin ladies who have
+dedicated themselves to the millinery and a single life. At that
+distance, she looked to Bog like a perfectly respectable woman,
+with a sharp eye to business. Farther on, toward the end of the
+same counter, was the angel of his heart, Patty Minford. Her
+appearance, pale, and therefore more touchingly beautiful than
+ever, threw his senses into that sweet flutter which is the proof
+and mystery of love. He repeated the vow which he had made to
+himself, and dreamed of fulfilling a thousand times, to save her
+from harm at the risk of his life. She was folding up articles on
+the counter, and packing them into little boxes, and did not look
+toward young Van Quintem. Bog thought this a good sign.</p>
+<p>The young man leaned over the counter, and addressed some words
+to her, to which her lips moved as if in reply, while her eyes were
+still downcast on her work. He then smoothed out the crumpled note
+which he had carried in his hand, and placed it before her. She
+started in amazement, as she remarked the close imitation of her
+handwriting; and, having read it, shook her head with a wondering
+air. Young Van Quintem's inexpressive face assumed a look of
+astonishment, and he instantly walked to the door, and peered up
+and down the street, and opposite. Then he nodded to Miss Minford,
+as if to excuse himself for a moment, and, darting out of the shop,
+walked rapidly to the street below, and then to the one above,
+passing Bog's hiding place on that side of the street, and causing
+that youth to remove his eye from the keyhole for fear of
+detection. When he had made this reconnoissance, and satisfied
+himself that there was no spy about, he returned to the shop. In
+the mean time, some pantomime had been going on between Miss
+Minford and the shopwoman, which Bog interpreted to mean that Miss
+Minford appealed to her for protection, and that the shopwoman
+promised it. This was followed by the retiring of the young lady
+through a door in the rear of the shop, and the locking of the door
+by her female friend, who put the key in her pocket.</p>
+<p>Young Van Quintem came in, and was surprised not to see Patty.
+The shopwoman explained, with a gesture, that she had gone up
+stairs, whereon he consulted his watch, and then sat down in an
+armchair in front of the counter, as if with the determination of
+waiting for her.</p>
+<p>Bog judged, from all the circumstances, that Miss Minford would
+not again show herself for some time; that young Van Quintem would
+wait, in the hope of seeing her; and that the shopwoman could be
+depended on as her friend to the last. He therefore concluded that
+he might safely spend time to go to the ferry house, and procure
+the company of old Van Quintem and Mrs. Crull, who had probably
+reached the rendezvous. Watching for an opportunity when the young
+man's back was turned, Bog lightly vaulted from his hiding place,
+and noiselessly ran down the street.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="K_CHAPTER_VII."></a>CHAPTER VII.</h2>
+<h3>FOUND AND LOST.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>When he arrived at the ferry house, the boat was coming in, with
+his venerable accomplices on board. Upon receiving her cue from the
+faithful Bill Fish, Mrs. Crull entered her carriage (which had been
+in readiness for her since Bog started out on his search), and was
+driven to Mr. Van Quintem's. The old gentleman, who was sitting in
+his study, with his light overcoat and hat on, prepared for any
+journey, took the spare seat in the carriage, and, in less than
+twenty-five minutes, by fast driving and the timely cooperation of
+the ferry boat, they were at the appointed spot.</p>
+<p>"Have you found her, you dear Bog?" asked Mrs. Crull,
+breathless.</p>
+<p>Bog answered "Yes," and that Mrs. Crull should see her in five
+minutes. That lady then assisted him into the carriage, and kissed
+him on the forehead in a motherly way, which would have astonished
+the sedate family coachman, if he had not been entirely used to
+Mrs. Crull's eccentricities.</p>
+<p>"My good boy," said old Van Quintem, in a trembling voice, "are
+you sure we are not too late--quite sure?"</p>
+<p>"Sure!" said Bog.</p>
+<p>"Thank God! thank God!" murmured the old gentleman. Then he
+looked with a strange interest upon the honest and intelligent face
+of the lad. He was contrasting the history of the poor boy, which
+he had learned from Mrs. Crull, with that of his abandoned son.</p>
+<p>The carriage was stopped, by the order of Bog (who calmly took
+charge of the whole proceedings), at the corner of the street below
+the shop; and the party (excepting the driver) walked slowly toward
+the scene of interest. Old Van Quintem's increasing infirmities
+compelled him to lean for support on the arm of Mrs. Crull, and
+also with greater and more confiding weight, on that of Bog.</p>
+<p>As the party entered the shop, young Van Quintem was sitting
+with his head turned toward the door by which Miss Minford had
+vanished, savagely biting his finger nails. He wheeled in his
+chair, and confronted the intruders.</p>
+<p>"What the ---- are you doing here?" he cried to his father.</p>
+<p>"We are here to save a young girl from ruin, and you from
+another crime," said the old gentleman, greatly agitated, and
+leaning with his whole weight, now, on Bog's arm.</p>
+<p>"The ---- you are! And you have brought along an old woman, and
+a boy that looks like a pickpocket, to help you."</p>
+<p>The phrase "old woman" stirred up Mrs. Crull. She left the old
+gentleman's side, and advanced to within a yard of the profligate.
+"Old as I am," said she, "I'm strong enough to spank such a
+white-livered, broken-down puppy as you are. But I'll leave you to
+the hands of the law. It's a long lane that hasn't any turning,
+remember; and you'll pull up at the gallows at last. That's some
+comfort!"</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull here became conscious that it was highly impolite to
+lose her temper, and she fell back to the support of her old
+friend. Young Van Quintem laughed at her, showing his white teeth
+unpleasantly.</p>
+<p>"Ah, I recognize you now," he continued, looking maliciously at
+the boy Bog. "You are the young thief that tracked me here, are
+you? I'll settle with you now."</p>
+<p>He sprang from his chair, and strode toward the lad. He was met
+halfway by Bog, whom the insulting epithet had stung to the
+quick.</p>
+<p>A foe met halfway is half vanquished. A single glance at Bog's
+clear, courageous eye, and his sinewy proportions, assured young
+Van Quintem that he had more than his match.</p>
+<p>"This--this is no place for a row," he faltered. "I'll attend to
+you, some time, in the street."</p>
+<p>"I shall always be ready for you," said Bog, smiling at this
+pusillanimous postponement--which is a mild way of making a clear
+backout.</p>
+<p>Here the attention of all was called off by the appearance of
+Miss Minford. The quick ear of the milliner had caught her footstep
+on the stairs, coming down. She unlocked the door, and the
+beautiful object of their search stood before them. She was very
+pale, and tears dimmed her eyes. Mrs. Crull flew toward her, and
+the poor girl fell on her breast, and cried as if her heart would
+break.</p>
+<p>Good Mrs. Crull helped her to a sofa, and sat down, and strained
+her young friend closely to her bosom, "Be calm," said she, "dear
+child!"</p>
+<p>Old Van Quintem and Bog looked on with sad interest. The young
+villain stood in a corner, gnawing his finger nails, and revolving
+schemes of vengeance. All waited for Miss Minford to become calm
+before any explanation was sought.</p>
+<p>Under the soothing caresses of Mrs. Crull, the young girl soon
+became comparatively tranquil. With her head still pillowed on the
+broad bosom of her protectress, she made a broken statement to the
+following effect, in response to the tender questionings of that
+lady:</p>
+<p>She said that she had no thought of leaving the house of her
+dear friend, until he had told her how much better it would be to
+earn her own living at some easy and pleasant trade, than to be
+dependent on one who was not a relative. He had also told her that,
+one day, when he was passing the house, he heard Mr. Crull scolding
+because Mrs. Crull had brought a girl home to be her companion.</p>
+<p>At this point, Mrs. Crull turned furiously toward the pale
+offender. "You miserable wretch!" said she. "I only wish my dear
+old man was here, to thrash you soundly. Why, he loved this little
+darling almost as much as I did. Besides, I'm the mistress of our
+house; and he never meddles with my affairs. Go on, dear Pet."</p>
+<p>Pet then stated that he (she never called him by his name) had
+promised to get a place for her, and that she, supposing he was a
+true friend, had accepted the offer of his aid. One day, when they
+had met by appointment (which was very wrong, she admitted, with a
+fresh torrent of tears), he told her that he had found a nice
+situation for her in a milliner's shop in Greenpoint, and that she
+must come right away, or she would lose the chance. She went home,
+and packed up her few things in a handkerchief, and came with him
+here in a carriage. She came directly here, and had not been out of
+Mrs. Wopping's sight since then. Mrs. Wopping had treated her very,
+very kindly.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Wopping, who had been lying in wait for her opportunity,
+here spoke up. She was a respectable woman, she said, thank God!
+and had been in the business for fifteen years, in New York. They
+could inquire about her in Canal street, where she had served her
+apprenticeship; in Division street, where she had been a forewoman;
+and in Grand street, where she had kept a shop. In an evil hour,
+she had been persuaded to start a millinery establishment in
+Greenpoint; and a very bad time she had had of it. All she knew
+about this unfortunate affair, was this: The young man, there, had
+called on her, a few days ago, and said that he wanted to do a
+favor for an orphan girl, who was a distant relative of his. She
+was poor, he said, but proud--no strange thing, Mrs. Wopping
+believed--and would not accept anything directly from him.</p>
+<p>"Therefore," said Mrs. Wopping, "he wanted to arrange with me to
+give her some easy work to do, enough to make her think she was
+earning her own living, and he would pay me her board, and give me
+twenty shillings a week to hand to her as her wages. By this plan,
+I could get a boarder at a fair price, and the services of a young
+lady to wait on the shop for nothing. Very imprudently, I
+consented, but not before I had made the young man there swear to
+Heaven that his intentions were honorable. This he did in the most
+solemn manner. I loved the dear girl at first sight, and determined
+to watch over her, and keep her from harm. I had a little sister
+once--long since dead--that much resembled her. I should add, that,
+though Miss Minford seemed to think very well of the young man
+there, when he brought her here, she became quite suspicious of him
+yesterday--he was here all yesterday afternoon--and refused to ride
+out with him, though he had brought a handsome carriage for her. I
+advised her not to go."</p>
+<p>"Thank you, good Mrs. Wopping!" said Mrs. Crull, shaking that
+lady by the hand, "you have been a true friend to our dear child;
+and I'll order my bonnets from you for the futer. Virtue shouldn't
+always be its own reward.</p>
+<p>"You see, now, my darling," continued Mrs. Crull, "what a
+scoundrel you have escaped from. Will you be my adopted child
+forever? Speak, my precious!"</p>
+<p>Poor Pet threw her soft white arms around the thick neck of her
+protectress, and cried for joy. "Dear, dear mother!" she
+murmured.</p>
+<p>There was a pause, daring which everybody but young Van Quintem
+had occasion to wipe their eyes. He paced up and down, his brow
+wrinkled, and inextinguishable hate flashing from his eyes.</p>
+<p>"Well, sir," said his father, calmly, "what atonement have you
+to make for this outrage?"</p>
+<p>"You're a ---- old fool, and that's all I've got to say."</p>
+<p>"Heaven be praised that his poor mother was not spared for this
+sorrow!" was the tranquil reply.</p>
+<p>"Curse you--and the old woman's memory. You're always making a
+fuss about her."</p>
+<p>The benignant expression of old Van Quintem's face vanished
+instantly, and a just rage gleamed on every feature. "Unnatural
+son! monster! fiend!" he cried, raising his hands aloft; "at last
+you have gone too far. Leave my presence, sir, and
+never--never--let me see your face again. I say to you, and before
+these witnesses, that I disown and disinherit you
+forever--forever--forever!"</p>
+<p>The coward son could not endure that terrible visitation of
+parental wrath, and fled, without another word, from the shop.</p>
+<p>Old Van Quintem fell exhausted upon the strong shoulder of the
+boy Bog.</p>
+<p>"Henceforth," said he, "you--you--shall be my son."</p>
+<p class="ctr"><img src="images/400.png" width="60%" alt=""><br>
+<b>FATHER AND SON.</b></p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_TWELFTH."></a>BOOK TWELFTH.</h2>
+<h3>SPECULATIONS--PECUNIARY AND MATRIMONIAL.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="L_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>THE "COSMOPOLITAN WINDOW FASTENER."</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" was a veritable success. For
+the first time in his life, Mr. Wesley Tiffles's theories had been
+demonstrated by results. Had the "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener"
+been his own invention, and disposed of for his own behoof, he
+would have abandoned it long before its merits had been fairly
+tested, and tried some other of the myriad schemes that floated
+through his brain. But the profits of the "Cosmopolitan Window
+Fastener" went to another; and this was the secret of Wesley
+Tiffles's persistent (and therefore successful) exertions.</p>
+<p>This was his plan of operations: In the first place, from the
+funds supplied by Marcus Wilkeson, he procured a patent for the
+invention. In the second place, he put an advertisement a column
+long in every daily paper--six insertions paid in advance--and
+handed a highly polished brass model of the invention to the
+editor, with a request to notice, if perfectly agreeable. The just
+and logical result followed. Instead of the ten-line paragraph with
+which patent churns and washing machines are ordinarily turned
+loose on society, the "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" received
+notices so long and ornate, that it was quite impossible to derive
+from them a correct idea of the matchless simplicity of the
+invention.</p>
+<p>Having thus roused public curiosity, Tiffles, in the third
+place, took an office on Broadway, and put up a large sign
+inscribed in gilt capitals, "The Cosmopolitan Window Fastener
+Manufacturing Co." From this <i>pou sto</i>, Archimedes-like, he
+commenced to move the world of house owners. This he accomplished
+by the following manoeuvre: He caused double-leaded advertisements,
+under the head of special notices, to be inserted in all the
+papers, informing the public that it would be utterly impossible to
+supply the demand for the "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener," and that,
+therefore, it would be useless to send in orders. The Company were
+employing all the resources of two large manufacturing
+establishments; but it was evident that these would fail to meet
+the extraordinary and totally unexpected demand for this
+indispensable protection against burglars--this moral safeguard, as
+it might not inappropriately be called, of civilized homes. The
+Company had made every effort, but without success, to secure a
+force of skilled workmen equal to the emergency. Justice to their
+customers in all parts of the country, compelled the Company to
+announce that no orders received after that date could be filled
+under two months. Under these remarkable--they might say, in some
+respects, disagreeable--circumstances, they begged leave to throw
+themselves on the indulgence of a generous public.</p>
+<p>These notices were put forth not only in the form of newspaper
+advertisements, but as placards and handbills, which were stuck all
+over the city, and thrown into all the stages, falling like autumn
+leaves into the laps of passengers. This was the co&ouml;perative
+work of the boy Bog, who, though adopted by old Van Quintem as his
+son and heir, had not yet given up the bill-sticking business, but,
+on the contrary, had increased it, and now had a practical monopoly
+of it in the city, with branches in the suburbs. Bog would not eat
+the bread of idleness--and so he had modestly told Mr. Van
+Quintem--and that fine old gentleman had patted him on the back,
+and told him that there was genuine Dutch blood in him.</p>
+<p>Bogert &amp; Co. now employed a hundred lads; and Bog's
+department of labor was the general planning of operations, and the
+receiving and disbursement of the money--and a very nice and
+agreeable department it was. It enabled Bog to dress neatly, and
+keep his hands clean--two points upon which he was now extremely
+fastidious. Bog was growing tall, manly, and handsome. He was also
+showing a great improvement in his grammar and pronunciation--the
+fruit of diligent attendance at the evening school.</p>
+<p>The public, being thus continually informed that orders for the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" could not possibly be filled under
+two months, very naturally began to send in orders for the
+invaluable invention, to be filled after that period. Every mail
+brought hundreds of them from all parts of the country. The
+Company--that is, Wesley Tiffles--sat at their desk in the Broadway
+office from, nine to three o'clock, exhibiting the window fastener
+to hundreds of visitors, and receiving orders rather as a matter of
+favor to the customer than to the Company.</p>
+<p>At the end of a month, when orders to the amount of nearly
+seventy-five thousand dollars had been received--every Northern and
+Western State being extensively represented on the books--the
+Company issued another advertisement, to the effect that, owing to
+the overwhelming pressure of business, they were willing to dispose
+of patent rights for two of the States.</p>
+<p>There was a rush of applicants, to all of whom the Company could
+truthfully exhibit large and genuine orders from all the States.
+The rights for two States were readily sold, and the Company then
+found that they could spare one more for a fair compensation; and
+so on, until every State in the Union had been disposed of, and the
+Company had not an inch of United States territory left. Not only
+this, but liberal purchasers were found for Cuba, Canada, South
+America, England, France, Germany, Russia, and all the countries of
+the Continent.</p>
+<p>In three months, the Company had disposed of their entire
+interest, and realized about one hundred thousand dollars cash.
+This sum Tiffles had faithfully paid over, as fast as received, to
+Fayette Overtop, who not only represented Marcus Wilkeson (unknown
+to Pet), but was Pet's own attorney and agent. By Fayette Overtop
+it was placed in bank, credited to Miss Patty Minford, and subject
+to her order alone.</p>
+<p>Thus it happened that the poor inventor had not toiled in vain
+for the child that he loved.</p>
+<p>Tiffles--with that strange unselfishness sometimes found in men
+of his class--had not thought of or desired any compensation for
+his services, other than the payment of all the bills incurred in
+the operation. The pleasure which he took in manipulating the
+public, and seeing his labors crowned with success, was the only
+reward that he wished for.</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson, however, as soon as he saw that Tiffles was
+actually about to perform the amazing feat of raising money,
+determined, as an act of common justice, to insist upon his
+receiving twenty per cent. of the total. Tiffles flatly refused, at
+first, saying (which was true) that he could work a great deal
+better if he had no personal interest in the scheme; but yielded,
+at length, to the earnest solicitations of Marcus, backed by the
+emphatic declaration of Miss Minford (through her attorney), that
+she would not touch a penny of the money unless he consented. So,
+when the affairs of the Company were wound up, Tiffles found
+himself the possessor of twenty thousand dollars--a sum whose
+existence in a concrete form he had always secretly disbelieved.
+And Tiffles's first act was to settle up all his outstanding
+debts.</p>
+<p>The unexpected acquisition of this immense sum imparted a charm
+to every object in life except Miss Philomela Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>Poor Miss Wilkeson was quick to discern the change in Tiffles's
+manner toward her. His calls were as frequent as ever, but were
+exclusively on her half-brother, and had no side bearing in her
+direction. He no longer lingered in the entry to converse with her;
+and flatly refused her invitation to take a glass of wine in the
+dining room. Most ominous of signs, he did not press her hand in
+the least, when he took it in his own. His voice was no longer
+winning, but harsh and neglectful. Indifference brooded in the
+heart of the monster. The worst of it was, that he had been so
+cautious and noncommittal in his declarations, that she could not
+upbraid him for his perfidy. With a cold calculation worthy of a
+demon, he had made love in the pantomimic way, and eschewed written
+or verbal communications of an erotic nature. No jury could have
+muleted him one cent for damages in a breach-of-promise case, and
+he knew it.</p>
+<p>While Wesley Tiffles slipped off Miss Wilkeson like a loose
+glove, she might as well have tried to divest herself of her
+natural cuticle as to banish all thoughts of him. Miss Wilkeson was
+accustomed to allude mysteriously to certain sentimental affairs of
+her youth. In confidential moments, her friends had been favored
+with shadowy reminiscences of a romantic past. But truth compels us
+to state that Miss Wilkeson had never been the recipient of that
+delicate and awkward thing known as a proposal, and that she had
+never been kissed by man or boy since she wore long dresses. Hence
+the magnified importance which she attached to that kiss which, in
+a moment of reckless but cheap gallantry, Wesley Tiffles, on one
+fatal evening, had impressed upon her withered hand. She loved the
+destroyer of her peace with the pent-up energies of forty
+years.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="L_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>MIDDLE-AGED CUPID.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Being in ignorance of Tiffles's sudden fortune, she was at a
+loss how to explain his defection. She conjectured all things, and
+finally settled down to the conclusion that he was a coy young man,
+and had not been sufficiently encouraged by her. She remembered
+instances where he had exhibited signs of ardor--in one case so far
+as beginning to slip a hand around her waist--and she had repelled
+him. He was evidently waiting for some marked encouragement. How
+foolishly prudish she had been!</p>
+<p>One evening, as Wesley Tiffles was passing through the hall to
+the door, after a rattling hour with the three bachelors, he was
+confronted by Miss Wilkeson, who chanced to leave the front parlor
+on a journey up stairs at that moment. She was dressed in a light
+silk, and her hair was carefully braided, and her face had a pink
+color in some parts, which contrasted well with the pallor in other
+parts; and her glass had told her that she was looking uncommonly
+youthful and charming. She had carefully studied her part, which
+was to be a bold one, throwing off all reserve.</p>
+<p>"Good evening, Mr. Tiffles," said she, promptly offering her
+hand.</p>
+<p>He took it with unsqueezing indifference. She had expected
+that.</p>
+<p>"Mr. Tiffles," said she, with an air of youthful raillery, "you
+are a naughty man, and I had an idea of not speaking to you
+again."</p>
+<p>"Naughty!" said Tiffles, astonished. "How?"</p>
+<p>"Why, you have hardly been civil to me, of late. I do believe
+you wouldn't speak, or shake hands with me, if I didn't always set
+the example." This in a half-complaining, half-laughing way.</p>
+<p>It suddenly flashed upon Tiffles that he had been, for some
+time, rather neglectful of the lady. It also forcibly occurred to
+him that it was wise policy to be on good terms, at all times, with
+the mistress of the house; and such was Miss Wilkeson's present
+position. He therefore clutched her hand again, gave it a faint
+squeeze, and said that he apologized a million times for his
+rudeness; but the fact was, he had so much business on hand, that
+he had been turned into a perfect bear, he supposed. He playfully
+challenged Miss Wilkeson to step into the parlor and take a glass
+of wine, and he would show her that he was not the brute she
+fancied.</p>
+<p>Miss Wilkeson laughingly accepted the challenge. "But I do
+believe," she added, "that it is only the glass of wine you care
+for. Now tell me, Mr. Tiffles, aren't you a woman hater?"</p>
+<p>"When a man is asked that question, categorically, by a woman,
+his most effective answer is to make love to her out of hand.
+Tiffles was not prepared to do this in the present case, but he was
+willing to pay compliments to any extent.</p>
+<p>"Ah, Miss Wilkeson, there you do me great injustice," said he,
+with his pleasantest of laughs. "I drink this glass of wine to
+'lovely woman,'" with a nod at Miss Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>Miss Wilkeson giggled, and took a fly's sip from the brim of her
+glass.</p>
+<p>Tiffles heaved a sigh. "We bachelors are poor, unhappy fellows,
+really to be pitied."</p>
+<p>"You are horrid creatures--you know you are--and deserve no pity
+from us!" Miss Wilkeson played her frisky, juvenile part
+admirably.</p>
+<p>"So charming, and yet so cruel!" said Tiffles, uttering the
+first preposterous compliment that he thought of.</p>
+<p>"You flatterer!" said Miss Wilkeson, beating a breeze toward him
+with her fan.</p>
+<p>Tiffles, observing that matters were coming to a crisis, paused.
+Miss Wilkeson interpreted his silence as another attack of
+timidity. Time was valuable to her, and this kind of conversation
+might be kept up all night, and amount to nothing. She resolved
+upon her final <i>coup</i>.</p>
+<p>"Oh! oh! Mr. Tiffles, what--what is the matter?" She looked
+wildly about her.</p>
+<p>"The matter! What matter?" exclaimed that gentleman, little
+suspecting what was to happen.</p>
+<p>"The wine--the warm weather--something--oh! oh!"</p>
+<p>"With these inexplicable remarks, Miss Wilkeson dropped her fan,
+uttered a slight but sharp scream, and fell back in her chair, like
+a withered flower on a broken stalk.</p>
+<p>"By thunder, she has fainted!" said the excited Tiffles. He had
+never been in a similar dilemma, and did not know what to do. He
+had heard tickling of the feet highly recommended in such cases;
+but that was obviously impracticable. A dash of cold water in the
+face was also said to afford instant relief; but there was no water
+at hand. "I must call for help," said he.</p>
+<p>This remark appeared to arouse Miss Wilkeson. "Support me," she
+murmured. "I shall be better soon."</p>
+<p>Tiffles, all accommodation, clasped her fragile waist with an
+arm, and gently inclined her head upon his shoulder. She heaved a
+sigh, and gave other tokens of returning animation. Tiffles here
+noticed that her face had not the prevailing paleness which always
+accompanies fainting. He instantly suspected the true nature of
+Miss Wilkeson's complaint.</p>
+<p>The noise of quick footsteps resounded in the entry. Marcus,
+Overtop, and Maltboy had heard the sharp scream, and were rushing
+to the rescue.</p>
+<p>"Good heavens! what will they say?" exclaimed Tiffles. "Don't be
+silly, Miss Wilkeson, at your time of life." This cutting remark
+was wrung from him by the annoyance and confusion of the
+moment.</p>
+<p>It served as a wonderful anodyne; for Miss Wilkeson Jerked
+herself into an erect position, and said, "You're a fool!"</p>
+<p>At this juncture, before Tiffles had quite uncoiled his
+serpentine arms from her, and while she was looking fiery
+indignation at him, the door was pushed open, and the three
+bachelors rushed in.</p>
+<p>"I really beg pardon," said Marcus. "No occasion for my
+services, I see--ahem!"</p>
+<p>"Heard a scream--thought it was here--no intention to intrude,"
+added Overtop.</p>
+<p>The tableau reminded Maltboy of his own innumerable little
+affairs, and he laughed. "It's a lovers' quarrel," said he, "and
+not to be interrupted, of course."</p>
+<p>The three bachelors hastily evacuated the room, and their merry
+laughs rang in the entry.</p>
+<p>"Miss Wilkeson," said Times, consulting his watch--he carried a
+gold one, with an enormous gold chain--"you must really excuse me.
+Important business engagement at nine. Good evening." So saying,
+Tiffles precipitately retired, with the determination not to enter
+the house again until he knew that Miss Wilkeson was out of it.</p>
+<p>A week from that memorable day, Tiffles met Marcus Wilkeson on
+Broadway.</p>
+<p>"Why haven't you been to see us?" said Marcus.</p>
+<p>"Not been very smart, of late," explained Tiffles.</p>
+<p>"Fainting fits, perhaps. Maybe they are catching, eh?"</p>
+<p>Tiffles smiled, for he saw that Marcus knew the truth. "How is
+Miss Wilkeson?" he asked, respectfully.</p>
+<p>"She has gone into the country for her health, and will probably
+stay away a number of years. In short, I have engaged for her the
+position of first preceptress of a female seminary in the middle of
+the State. She said she was quite sick of the hollow and heartless
+life of New York."</p>
+<p>Marcus spoke truly. Miss Wilkeson had retired to the country
+with a thorough feeling of disgust for town existence. She has
+taught for several years, and is still teaching in the ---- Young
+Ladies' Seminary, with eminent success, though her fair pupils
+complain, with much pretty pouting, of her savage restrictions upon
+all walks and talks with the eligible young beaux of the village.
+They say that she hates the men; and they call her a cross old
+maid, and a great number of other hard epithets.</p>
+<p>But, sometimes, a tear is observed in the corner of her eye,
+which she hastily wipes away. That tear is an oblation upon the
+memory of a lost love. That lost love was, and is, and always will
+be, Wesley Tiffles.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="L_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>SLAPMAN <i>vs</i>. SLAPMAN.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The case of Slapman <i>vs</i>. Slapman occupied the attention of
+the referee, Samuel Goldfinch, Esq., over two months. That
+gentleman was corpulent, fond of good dinners, and had a highly
+cultivated taste for scandal. It had been his custom to give this
+interesting case a hearing one or two hours every afternoon, daily,
+after court. It was a relief from the heavy business of the day;
+for Goldfinch had heavy business, which came to him because he was
+a fat and pleasant fellow, with a large head, and a great circle of
+miscellaneous acquaintance. The real work of the office was done by
+a modest, unappreciated man named Mixer. On the occasion of these
+antimatrimonial audiences, Mixer sat in the back room, grubbing
+among his dusty papers; while Samuel Goldfinch, Esq., in the front
+room, with shut doors, leaned back in his easy chair and
+surrendered himself to enjoyment.</p>
+<p>In the case of Slapman <i>vs</i>. Slapman, a great number of
+witnesses had been examined on each side. Affidavits, amounting to
+hundreds of pages, had been obtained in distant States--some as far
+away as California. The lawyers had spared neither their own time
+nor the money of their clients in raking together testimony which
+would bear in the slightest degree upon the interests which they
+represented. All the relatives of Mr. Slapman had testified that he
+was a gentleman uniformly kind and courteous, possessing a singular
+placidity of temper, and indulgent to his wife to a degree where
+indulgence became a fault. Those relatives, and they were
+numerous--particularly in the country branch--who had passed
+anniversary weeks at Mr. Slapman's house, were very severe on Mrs.
+Slapman. She was a proud, disagreeable woman. She was continually
+snubbing her husband before people. She had a great many male
+friends, whose acquaintance she had retained in defiance of his
+wishes. She was known to have received letters from men, and when
+her husband had desired to peruse them, had laughed at him. It is
+true that she pretended to be a patroness of literature, science,
+and the arts; but anybody could see that those things were only the
+cover of the grossest improprieties. She had been heard to listen
+without remonstrance, to declarations of love from several young
+men. It turned out, upon cross-examination, that these
+irregularities took place in charades and plays, of which Mr.
+Slapman's relatives had been shocked spectators. With regard to Mr.
+Overtop's transactions in the family, they could say nothing; for
+they had long since ceased to visit Mrs. Slapman, on account of her
+disgraceful conduct--and also (they might have added, but they did
+not add) because Mrs. Slapman latterly had her house full of
+Jigbees, and put her husband's relatives into obscure rooms in the
+third story, and quite forgot their existence afterward.</p>
+<p><i>Per contra</i>, all the Jigbees--and they were a prolific
+race--swore that their distinguished relative was a pattern of
+artlessness and innocence. That she was remarkable from early
+childhood for a charming frankness and transparent candor. That
+when this bright ornament of the Jigbee stock was sought in
+marriage by the defendant, the whole family, with one mind and
+voice, opposed the match. They had felt that a being of her exalted
+intellectual tastes was too good for a sordid money-getting
+creature like Slapman. But that man, by his ingenious artifices,
+had succeeded in winning the hand of their gifted kinswoman, and
+married her against their unanimous protests. There was but one
+consolation for this family misfortune. Mr. Slapman was reported to
+be wealthy, and could afford to indulge his wife in the exercise of
+her noble longings for TRUTH. They were willing to say that Mr.
+Slapman had not been illiberal, so far as vulgar money was
+concerned. He had given to his wife the house and lot which she
+occupied, and had never stinted her in respect of allowances. But
+what was money to a woman of Mrs. Slapman's soul, when her husband
+withheld from her his confidence and trust, regarded her innocent
+labors in behalf of Art, Literature, and the Drama, with a cold,
+unsympathizing eye, and finally descended so low as to feel a
+brutal jealousy of those gentlemen of talent, of whom she was the
+revered patroness?</p>
+<p>"Money" (we are quoting here from the remarks of Mrs. Slapman's
+eminent counsel) "is very desirable in its way, but is it not the
+vilest dross, your Honor, when compared with the pure gold of
+connubial trust and sympathy?" Mr. Goldfinch nodded his head, as if
+to say that he rather thought it was.</p>
+<p>The testimony of two servant girls established the fact that Mr.
+Slapman had several times been overheard to tell his wife that she
+would regret it; and that the time was fast coming when forbearance
+would cease to be a virtue; also that the worm, when trodden on
+repeatedly, might at last turn and sting, and many other
+enigmatical sayings of that character. The very vagueness of these
+threats, implying unknown horrors, had inspired his wife with a
+mortal dread of him. She did not know at what moment this jealous
+and revengeful man might strike her dead. She had been living in
+the fear of her life for six years, and, during all this time, had
+never complained, or expressed that fear to one of her relatives or
+friends.</p>
+<p>"Such is the noble, uncomplaining nature," said the eminent
+counsel, in reference to this fact, "of the woman that Fate has
+thrown into the arms of a fiend."</p>
+<p>But the most striking proof of Mr. Slapman's murderous designs
+upon his wife, was his conduct at the last dramatic
+<i>soir&eacute;e</i>. Twenty witnesses swore that it was his
+evident intention to spring on her and strangle her, and that he
+was only thwarted in this horrid purpose by the noble courage of
+Fayette Overtop, Esq. Mr. Overtop briefly and modestly testified to
+this effect also; and, furthermore, narrated all the particulars of
+his acquaintance with Mrs. Slapman, holding before her a shield,
+from which the arrows of calumny, aimed by her husband, fell
+harmless.</p>
+<p>Mr. Slapman had not shown himself in the referee's office since
+the investigation began. He had become convinced that he had lost
+the case into which his mad jealousy and his lawyer's advice had
+plunged him. Mrs. Slapman, according to the testimony of the two
+servants and several others, was immured in her house, and brooding
+over this saddest episode in her unhappy history.</p>
+<p>"Nothing but that instinct of self-preservation," said the
+eminent counsel, "which bids the dove to fly from the hawk, and the
+rabbit to evade the pursuing hounds, could have induced that
+delicate, shrinking lady to lay bare the horrors of her prison
+house to the world, and to ask, in the name of common humanity, a
+release from the tyrant, and a liberal alimony."</p>
+<p>The eminent counsel repeated this flight of fancy in the ear of
+Mrs. Slapman, at the opera that evening, whither she was
+accompanied by a few of the Jigbees, and she smiled, and said that
+it was really beautiful.</p>
+<p>The protracted case--of which we have given a mere sketch--was
+decided by Samuel Goldfinch, Esq., in favor of the lady, a
+separation was decreed, and alimony fixed at six thousand dollars a
+year, that being only a wife's fair proportion of Mr. Slapman's
+income. Mrs. Slapman, with a well-assumed appearance of levity,
+gave a <i>grande soir&eacute;e musicale et dramatique</i> at her
+house, in honor of the event, at which Overtop was a favored guest.
+Mr. Slapman went direct to Slapmanville, and raised the rent on all
+his tenants, turned a superannuated non-paying couple into the
+street, and took a general account of his property, to see how much
+he could sell out for, preparatory to leaving for Europe, and so
+dodging the payment of the alimony.</p>
+<p>The illustrated papers published two portraits--one of an angel,
+the other of a demon. The angel was Mrs. Slapman: the demon was her
+husband. The comic papers served him up in puns, conundrums, and
+acrostics, of the most satirical import. The daily papers, always
+on the look out for subjects to write about, improved the occasion
+to overhaul the question of divorce, in its statistical, moral,
+social, and religious bearings. Two editors, in pursuance of a
+previous agreement, continued to discuss the question with great
+warmth in their respective journals, until they had written about
+two hundred octavo pages, when the debate was published in book
+form, with paper covers, and sold for their joint benefit.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="L_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>HOW OVERTOP SEALED A CONTRACT IN A WAY UNKNOWN TO CHITTY.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The notoriety which Fayette Overtop had derived from his
+questionable connection with the Slapman Divorce case, had (as has
+been already stated) materially contributed to his professional
+income. By the time the case was decided, the firm of Overtop &amp;
+Maltboy ranked among the most successful of the Junior Bar.</p>
+<p>Now that Overtop had his hands full of business, his thoughts
+reverted to matrimony more strongly than ever. It is a singular
+fact, that business men find more time to think of marriage, than
+men of leisure.</p>
+<p>Thoughts of matrimony invariably brought Miss Pillbody into
+Overtop's head. He would project mental photographs of her at the
+top of a table, beaming sweetly upon him, opposite, with her dim,
+lovely eyes, and pouring out the tea from a small silver pot.
+Overtop never could explain it; but this imaginary picture realized
+all his desires of domestic happiness.</p>
+<p>Overtop not only thought of Miss Pillbody, but, what was more to
+the purpose, he visited her. For this, pretexts were not wanting.
+They never are. At first, he professed to have been requested, by a
+friend in the country, to find a suitable private school for two
+young daughters. This justified several visits, until Miss Pillbody
+could decide positively that it would be impossible for her to take
+them--an announcement which greatly relieved Overtop, though it
+temporarily put an end to his calls. Then he hit upon the expedient
+of pretending to write an essay on Popular Education, for a monthly
+magazine, and desired to obtain hints from her upon the subject.
+Miss Pillbody, not displeased with the compliment, though declaring
+that she had not an idea to give him, gave him a great many good
+ideas, to which he appeared to listen, while he was contemplating
+her trim figure, and the animated expression of her face, and
+thinking how very well she would look at the head of that poetical
+table behind that phantom teapot. At last the topic of Popular
+Education ran out; and Overtop felt that this kind of imposition
+could not be practised much longer.</p>
+<p>One day, while Overtop sat at his desk, with a mass of law
+papers before him, thinking not of them but of his dilemma with
+respect of Miss Pillbody, a small boy brought him a beautifully
+written little note from that lady, asking him to call that evening
+on business. Overtop sent a reply, written with extraordinary care
+(this is a sign of love), saying that he would be happy to call, as
+requested. At the same time, he felt a pang of apprehension that
+she had found places in her school for the two young daughters of
+his supposititious country friend.</p>
+<p>Overtop dressed with unusual care that evening, and presented
+himself at Miss Pillbody's house, punctually at the appointed hour.
+The young teacher was hard at work in the back parlor, setting copy
+for the illiterate wife of a rich city contractor to try her brawny
+fist on next day. Miss Pillbody's bewitching eyeglasses bestrided
+her nose; and the narrow collar, wristbands, and dainty apron with
+the red-bound pockets, looked whiter than ever.</p>
+<p>The teacher blushed slightly as Overtop entered, and put away
+the copy book on a high shelf, thereby intimating that she should
+not work more that night, and Overtop could stay as long as he
+would. Thus, at least, that sagacious student of men, women, and
+things, interpreted it. Without a particle of those preliminary
+commonplaces for which Overtop had a cherished aversion, Miss
+Pillbody broke into business at once.</p>
+<p>She said that a Mrs. Cudgeon, the wife of a citizen who had made
+a large fortune in butter and eggs, had been taking lessons in all
+the English branches, and French (here Miss Pillbody smiled), for
+six months, but had postponed payment on one pretext and another,
+and had finally withdrawn from the school, leaving unpaid tuition
+to the amount of one hundred and fifty dollars. Miss Pillbody had
+written several dunning letters to Mrs. Cudgeon, and received no
+answer. The soft grass of epistolary entreaty having failed, Miss
+P. now proposed to try what virtue there was in the hard stones of
+the law. She had sent to Mr. Overtop for advice.</p>
+<p>Overtop listened to the statement of the case with professional
+attentiveness. He was sub-thinking, all the time, what an extremely
+sensible woman Miss Pillbody was, not to allow herself to be
+cheated, but to go to law in defence of her rights. He assured his
+interesting client that she could count on his best services, and
+that she might consider the one hundred and fifty dollars as good
+as recovered. From this point the conversation glided off into a
+wilderness of general topics. Overtop had a habit (a bad one, it
+must be confessed) of sounding people's mental depths. He found
+that Miss Pillbody was no shallow thinker. He left the house at
+eleven o'clock, supposing it was ten, and had a delightful vision,
+that night, of the little round table and the teapot, and the
+presiding angel.</p>
+<p>Next day, Overtop wrote the following letter:</p>
+<blockquote>New York,--.<br>
+MR. J. CUDGEON:<br>
+<br>
+SIR: Enclosed is a bill of items, amounting to one hundred and
+fifty dollars, for your wife's tuition at Miss Pillbody's private
+school. Be good enough to look it over, and inform me, to-morrow,
+what you will do about it. I will tell you candidly, that it is for
+our interest, as a young law firm, to sue you for the debt; but my
+client will not consent to this, until all other efforts fail, out
+of regard to the feelings of Mrs. C.<br>
+<br>
+Your obedient servant,<br>
+OVERTOP &amp; MALTBOY,<br>
+No ------ Building,<br>
+J. CUDGEON, Esq.</blockquote>
+<p>Overtop remembered that one J. Cudgeon had run for the Assembly
+at the previous fall election, and he surmised that, being a
+politician and a public character, J. Cudgeon would not like to see
+the bill of items in print. Overtop reasoned correctly; for, at ten
+A.M. the following day, that gentleman called at the office and
+paid the one hundred and fifty dollars, and said that he was very
+much obliged to Overtop &amp; Maltboy for their gentlemanly conduct
+in the affair. Mr. Gudgeon had not been aware of his wife's
+pupilage at Miss Pillbody's private school, though he had observed
+(he added, confidentially), for some months past, a slight
+improvement in her grammar. "I am not ashamed to say that we were
+poor once," said Mr. Gudgeon, with a glow of pride.</p>
+<p>"When Overtop placed the one hundred and fifty dollars in the
+white hand of the schoolmistress, she looked at him with gratitude
+and admiration, which more than repaid him. Not only this, but she
+asked him, with not a particle of hesitation, how much his fee
+was.</p>
+<p>"Fee!" exclaimed Overtop, a little nettled at the implied
+insult. (Young lawyers are apt to be.) "Nothing, Miss Pillbody;
+decidedly nothing."</p>
+<p>"But I prefer to pay you, Mr. Overtop. Why should you work for
+me for nothing, when I am not willing to do the same thing for Mrs.
+Gudgeon? 'The laborer is worthy of his hire,'" she added, laughing.
+"I set that adage in a copy book to-night."</p>
+<p>"But I won't take anything," said Overtop, no longer nettled,
+but charmed to perceive this exhibition of sound good sense in a
+young lady.</p>
+<p>"But I insist that you shall," continued Miss Pillbody,
+pleasantly. "Tell me, now, how much it is."</p>
+<p>Overtop was standing within two feet of the schoolmistress, and
+her soft, dim eyes were beaming right into his. We leave
+psychologists to settle the phenomenon as they will; but the fact
+was, that each saw love in the eyes of the other. Overtop, in his
+bachelor musings, had thought over a hundred odd methods of putting
+<i>the</i> question. At this critical moment in the history of two
+hearts, a new form of the proposition occurred to him, so original
+and eccentric, that he determined to propound it at once.</p>
+<p>He took Miss Pillbody's hand in his, before she knew it. She
+blushed, and would have withdrawn it; but he retained the hand with
+a gentle pressure.</p>
+<p>"My dear Miss Pillbody," said Overtop, "I will take five dollars
+from you on one condition, and no other. Will you grant it?"</p>
+<p>The schoolmistress, not knowing what she was saying, said
+"Yes."</p>
+<p>"The condition is, that I shall buy an engagement ring, and put
+it on this dear hand."</p>
+<p>Miss Pillbody blushed, and cast down her gentle eyes. The
+sagacious young lawyer, interpreting these signs as a full consent,
+stole his arm around her waist, and sealed the contract in a way
+all unknown to Chitty.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="L_CHAPTER_V."></a>CHAPTER V.</h2>
+<h3>A RETURNED CALIFORNIAN.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>At last, Matthew Maltboy was engaged. He had, since twenty, been
+dallying on the edge of a betrothal. Now he had taken the momentous
+step into that anomalous region which lies between celibacy and
+married life, where a man is not exactly a bachelor, nor yet, by
+any means, a husband. It is the land in which the dim enchantments
+of romance begin to assume the plain outlines of reality. It is the
+land in which the pledge of undying affection, breathed, at some
+rapturous moment, into a delicate, inclining ear, becomes invested
+with awful meaning, and has a value in the legal market like a bond
+and mortgage. It is the land where the excitement of pursuit is
+over, and the game is securely cornered, but not yet in hand. It is
+the spot where the ardent huntsman of Love pauses to look back, and
+ceases to bend his longing gaze into the distance beyond.</p>
+<p>How it came to pass that the unreliable Matthew Maltboy had
+become the affianced one of the pleasant widow Frump, it is not the
+purpose of this history to record. Let it suffice to say, that the
+mutual aversion which they felt, some months before, at Mr.
+Whedell's house, on New Year's day, was the starting point in their
+course of true love. Such an aversion, subsequently smoothed away,
+is often the most promising beginning of a courtship.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Frump had frequently met Matthew on the street, and been
+gratified with his deferential bow. His bulk, to which, as a rotund
+lady, she had taken an antipathy, seemed to dwindle down as it was
+looked at. Matthew, whose ideal was a delicate woman with
+observable shoulder blades, had also, by repeated sights of Mrs.
+Frump, become reconciled to her ample proportions. Meantime, they
+had heard much, incidentally, of each other through Marcus
+Wilkeson. Matthew had come to esteem Mrs. Frump for her
+affectionate devotion to old Van Quintem; and Mrs. Frump had
+secretly admired the powerful though silent legal ability displayed
+by Mr. Maltboy in the inquisition before Coroner Bullfast.</p>
+<p>One night, Matthew, accompanied Marcus to his old friend's
+house; and, on the second night following, this couple were
+engaged--a happy event, which was brought about no less by the
+widow's experience, and conviction that there was no time to lose,
+than by Matthew's impulsive ardor.</p>
+<p>He had been engaged ten days; and so entirely had he talked out
+the time to the widow, that it seemed six months.</p>
+<p>"Why is it," thought Matthew, stretching himself in his chair,
+and looking critically at the widow, who was knitting crotchet
+work, "why is it that I no longer adore her? She is just as pretty,
+just as amiable, just as affectionate as ever. Now, why don't I
+care a button for her at this moment?" Matthew was not a
+transcendental philosopher; and the true answers to these questions
+did not come to him.</p>
+<p>Old Van Quintem, pale and beautiful in his declining years, sat
+by the window that opened on the green leaves of the back yard,
+calmly smoking his pipe, and thinking, with a holy sadness, of his
+dead wife and his worse-than-dead son. The old gentleman, and the
+two quiet affianced ones, who sat near him, made up a well-dressed
+and handsome group; the pictorial effect of which was suddenly
+marred by the apparition of a stranger in the doorway.</p>
+<p>He was tall, muscular, and what little could be seen of his face
+through a heavy growth of whiskers was mild and prepossessing, in
+spite of two large scars just visible below the broad brim of a
+rough hat. His dress was faded and dirty.</p>
+<p>The stranger stood in the doorway, and surveyed the occupants of
+the room.</p>
+<p>Old Van Quintem looked at the intruder a moment, and then said,
+as if remembering something, "Are you the man sent by Crumley to
+mend my piazza railing?"</p>
+<p>There was the least hesitation in the man's voice, as he
+answered, "Yes, sir. I'm here to do that job." His voice was a deep
+growl, as of a grizzly bear half tamed.</p>
+<p>"Where are your tools?" asked old Van Quintem.</p>
+<p>The stranger communed with himself, and then replied, in the
+most natural manner, "I s'pose I only want a saw, a hammer, and a
+few nails. You have 'em, haven't yer?"</p>
+<p>"You're a funny sort of carpenter, to travel without your tools.
+Do you know, now, that you look more like a California miner than a
+carpenter?"</p>
+<p>"That's not very 'markable," returned the stranger, in profound
+guttural accents, "considerin' as how I come from California this
+week."</p>
+<p>"You have brought home tons of gold, I dare say," said old Van
+Quintem, playfully.</p>
+<p>"A little," growled the stranger. "The diggins was poor in
+Calaveras County when I fust went there, but latterly they
+improved."</p>
+<p>At the mention of Calaveras County, the widow suddenly fixed her
+eyes upon the stranger, and then dropped them on her crotchet
+work.</p>
+<p>Matthew Maltboy here conceived a happy thought, namely, to ask
+this stranger if he ever knew Amos Frump (the deceased husband of
+Mrs. Frump), who was killed in that very county in an affray
+growing out of a disputed claim, five years before. Mrs. Frump,
+after her engagement to Matthew, had furnished him with slips from
+three California papers, giving full particulars of the sanguinary
+affair. Before he was engaged, he had never felt the slightest
+curiosity to know the history of his predecessor; but, since then,
+he had entertained a strong secret desire to learn more of him, and
+especially of the reasons which induced him to abandon a young and
+lovely wife, and make a Californian exile of himself. Upon this
+subject the widow had never volunteered any satisfactory
+information, and he had been politely reluctant to ask her about
+it.</p>
+<p>Old Van Quintem, who was too sleepy at that time to talk much,
+procured the necessary tools from a cupboard in the kitchen, and
+showed the stranger what work was to be done. The old gentleman
+then returned to his easy chair by the window, threw a handkerchief
+over his head, and settled himself for a nap.</p>
+<p>Before the carpenter had struck the first blow, Matthew Maltboy
+rose, remarked to the widow that he wanted to stretch himself a
+little, and walked out upon the piazza.</p>
+<p>The carpenter stood near the door, with the saw in one hand and
+the hammer in the other, very much in the attitude of listening. At
+Matthew's approach, he commenced feeling the teeth of the saw, as
+if to test their sharpness.</p>
+<p>"I would like to speak a word with you, sir," said Matthew, in a
+low voice, motioning the carpenter to accompany him to a corner of
+the piazza, out of the widow's possible hearing.</p>
+<p>Having attained that safe position, Matthew opened the great
+subject.</p>
+<p>"You remarked that you had dug gold in Calaveras County," said
+he. "Did you ever happen to know a man by the name of Frump--Amos
+Frump--who was a miner there?"</p>
+<p>"Frump!" replied the carpenter. "He was an intimate friend of
+mine."</p>
+<p>"Now that's lucky," said Matthew, "for I want to find out
+something about the man."</p>
+<p>"Then you've come to the right shop," answered the carpenter;
+"for his own brother--if he ever had one--couldn't tell you more
+about him than I."</p>
+<p>"I am indeed fortunate. In the first place, then this man Frump
+is really--dead?"</p>
+<p>The carpenter pulled his rough hat farther over his forehead,
+and replied:</p>
+<p>"As dead as two big splits in the skull could make him. But
+'xcuse me, sir; he was my bosom friend, and I can't bear to talk of
+his death."</p>
+<p>"He <i>is</i> dead, then, and no mistake," said Matthew,
+soliloquizing. "Yet I am not exactly glad to know it."</p>
+<p>The carpenter's face expressed surprise at this remark.</p>
+<p>"I beg your pardon," said Matthew. "Of course I am not glad to
+hear of your friend's death. But, to tell the truth," he continued
+(inventing an excuse), "I had always heard that this Frump was a
+wild fellow; that he didn't treat his wife decently, and at last
+ran away from her. You see I am acquainted with the family. In
+fact, I know Mrs. Frump quite well."</p>
+<p>"And did she tell you all this about her dead husband?" asked
+the carpenter.</p>
+<p>"Oh, no!" returned Matthew, who began to fear that he had gone
+too far. "She never says anything about his personal character. I
+only spoke from common report."</p>
+<p>"Then common report is a common liar; for I know there never was
+a steadier chap than this same Amos Frump; and his wife can't say
+that he ever struck her, or said a cross word to her. Amos told me
+all about himself; and I'd believe him through thick and thin." The
+carpenter spoke in his dismal chest voice, without the least
+indication of excitement.</p>
+<p>"Then why did he leave his wife? and why did she never hear of
+him until the time of his death? You will confess that <i>that</i>
+was odd."</p>
+<p>"I give you the reasons," answered the carpenter, "as Amos give
+'em to me. It seems that <i>he</i> was a poor, uneducated feller.
+<i>She</i> had a few thousand dollars from her grandfather's
+property, and was sent by her parents to the best o' schools.
+Though he and she were so much unlike, they got up a kind o'
+fondness for each other from the time when Amos saved her from
+bein' run over by a horse. They used to meet each other secretly,
+because, you see, her folks didn't like Amos. They thought that a
+girl with three or four thousand dollars in her own name, ought to
+set her eyes rather above a feller like him. Well, arter no end o'
+trouble, they was married. Her folks pretended to treat Amos all
+right, but was allers talkin' agin him; and finally they pizened
+her mind with the idee that he had married her only for her money,
+and that all the while he loved another gal. She began to treat him
+very cold like, and, one day, when she was in a little bit of
+temper--"</p>
+<p>"Has Mrs. Frump any temper?" asked Matthew, anxiously. "I never
+saw it."</p>
+<p>"But you a'n't her husband," replied the carpenter. "Amos told
+me that she did show a leetle temper now and then. However, he
+allers said she was a pooty good gal in the main. Well, one day,
+when her dander was up about somethin', she told him that she
+b'lieved he married her for her money, and she'd die before he
+should have a cent. Amos was a proud feller, if he <i>was</i> poor;
+and, when he heerd this, he left the house right off, walked to New
+York, and shipped as a sailor to San Francisco. I met him when he
+fust come to the mines, and, as he was a spry, tough chap, I let
+him work a claim with me on shares. We ate and slept together, and
+many a time, in the dark night, has he spoke to me about his wife,
+and how much he thought of her; but he said he never should go back
+till he had money enough to buy out her and her hull family. We was
+very unlucky, and Amos got downhearted, and took to drink. By and
+by he moved off to another claim, and worked on his own hook. He
+did better there; but all the gold he dug out he used to spend in
+gamblin' and rum; and at last a drunken quarrel put an end to Amos
+Frump."</p>
+<p>"Poor fellow!" said Matthew. "And do you think the widow ever
+grieved for him?"</p>
+<p>"No, I guess not; for Amos allers said that she was not a very
+lovin', affectionate woman; though, if he had been as rich as her,
+or if her family had let her alone, she would have made him a
+tol'able wife."</p>
+<p>"Not loving! Not affectionate!" thought Matthew. "And I am about
+to marry her!" A cold shudder crept over him.</p>
+<p>Hiding his emotions with an effort, he again interrogated the
+affable carpenter:</p>
+<p>"And do you really think that Mr. Frump would have returned, and
+lived again with his wife, if he had become rich?"</p>
+<p>"To be sure he would. He couldn't marry anybody else, yer know,
+without committin' bigamy. He allers said he didn't care much
+whether his wife loved him, so long as she treated him
+civilly."</p>
+<p>"Mr. Frump had practical views of married life," suggested
+Matthew.</p>
+<p>"Amos was sensible in some things," said the carpenter. "But he
+was a queer feller, too. He allers had a notion of comin' home kind
+o' disguised, so that his wife shouldn't know him. I used to tell
+him that a few more years in Californy would make him so thin,
+yaller, and grizzly, that he wouldn't need no disguise."</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="L_CHAPTER_VI."></a>CHAPTER VI.</h2>
+<h3>REVELATIONS OF A LAUGH.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The carpenter here burst out with an extraordinary peal of
+laughter. It was so very peculiar, that, once heard, it would
+always be identified with the person making it. This singular laugh
+consisted of a brilliant stacatto passage on a high key,
+interrupted by occasional snorts, and terminating with a slur which
+covered the whole descending octave. It was also very loud and very
+long.</p>
+<p>It had the effect of bringing Mrs. Frump to the door. She thrust
+out her head, unseen by either the carpenter or Matthew, and looked
+at the former with a wondering air.</p>
+<p>"It was an odd idea," said Matthew, laughing slightly out of
+compliment to the carpenter, though he could not understand what
+there was to laugh at.</p>
+<p>"And now," continued he, when the carpenter's cachinations had
+subsided, "I will explain to you my motive in asking all these
+questions. I am engaged to Mrs. Frump, and she is now--"</p>
+<p>The carpenter immediately broke into another of his remarkable
+laughs, louder and longer than before.</p>
+<p>"Well, sir," said Matthew, sarcastically, "when you get through,
+perhaps you will be good enough to tell me what you are laughing
+about?"</p>
+<p>"The idee--ha! ha!--of your--ha! ha!--marrying Mrs.--ha! ha!
+ha!" and the remainder of the sentence was lost in that monstrous
+laugh.</p>
+<p>Matthew, irritated by this most aggravating species of ridicule,
+took the carpenter's measure for a kick--but judiciously refrained
+from fitting him with one.</p>
+<p>The second of the carpenter's laughs had made the widow (still
+stealthily looking out of the door) turn pale. The third had
+inspired her with a painful curiosity, which she had determined to
+gratify, at any risk. Before the last laugh, she had, therefore,
+crept up, unobserved, near where Matthew and the carpenter were
+standing, with their backs toward her. Coming around suddenly in
+front of them, she saw the carpenter's mouth wide open, still in
+the act of laughing, and observed that one of his front teeth was
+out. The widow screamed, and fell--into Matthew's arms, nearly
+flooring him.</p>
+<p>"Hold on to her," said the carpenter. "She will come to in a
+minute."</p>
+<p>"Who, sir--who on earth <i>are</i> you?" shouted Matthew,
+struggling under the burdensome widow and a sense of mental
+bewilderment.</p>
+<p>"I am Amos Frump," he replied, in a voice which had suddenly
+risen five notes.</p>
+<p>"The widow's husband! The dead come to life!" exclaimed Matthew,
+starting back, and nearly dropping the inanimate form.</p>
+<p>Astounded as he was, he did not forget the marital rights of the
+man before him; and he said, with a trembling voice, politely, "I
+beg your pardon; but, as you are this lady's husband, perhaps you
+had better hold her."</p>
+<p>"She appears to be doing very well where she is," replied the
+singularly calm Amos Frump. "A moment more, and she will be out of
+her fainting spell. I've seed her very often this way before."</p>
+<p>Mr. Frump's prediction was verified; for his lips had scarcely
+closed on the words, when Mrs. Frump opened her eyes, and feebly
+said, "Is it a dream?"</p>
+<p>"No, Gusty," replied the composed Amos; "it is a husband come
+back from Californy, with fifty thousand dollars."</p>
+<p>"It is--it is my own 'husband's voice!" cried Mrs. Frump,
+throwing herself impulsively out of Matthew's arms upon the patched
+and faded coat of her restored consort.</p>
+<p>"I thought you would know the voice," said Amos, "and that's the
+reason I changed it into a growl. This 'ere old Californy suit was
+a pooty good disguise, too. But my confounded laugh betrayed me. I
+didn't think to change that."</p>
+<p>The third laugh had roused old Van Quintem from a nice nap, and
+he came out on the piazza.</p>
+<p>"Hallo, Mr. Carpenter! what are you doing there?" said he,
+good-naturedly.</p>
+<p>A few words from the supposed carpenter defined his position,
+and threw old Van Quintem into the appropriate state of amazement.
+Looking at the shaggy face by a variety of lights, he soon came to
+recognize it as that of his niece's husband, whom he had seen a few
+times on his yearly visits to the country, before his farming
+brother, Nicholas Van Quintem, father of Mrs. Frump, had died.</p>
+<p>"From the way Gusty hangs to you, I judge you are no ghost,"
+said old Van Quintem, when he had partly recovered his senses.</p>
+<p>"No more than I am a carpenter," was the dry response.</p>
+<p>"But how does it happen that you are no ghost?" asked old Van
+Quintem, with fearful interest.</p>
+<p>This was what everybody wanted to know; and so Mr. Frump,
+supporting his wife by the waist, while she, apparently half
+stupefied, reposed her head on his shoulder, explained the mystery
+of his appearance. He had been severely injured in a drunken
+quarrel about a claim--he would not deny <i>that</i>; and, taking
+off his broad-brimmed hat, he showed the two deep scars extending
+from his eyebrows to the roots of his hair. He was left on the
+ground for dead, and his assailants ran away. The enterprising
+correspondent of three San Francisco papers saw him when he was
+first found, and, learning that he would undoubtedly die, the
+enterprising correspondent regarded him as already sufficiently
+dead for newspaper purposes, and sent three thrilling accounts of
+his butchery, written up with ingenious variations, to the three
+journals of which he was the indefatigable "special." In a few
+days, the nearly murdered man was out of danger. On learning that
+the news of his death had already been sent to the papers, the
+singular idea came into his mind to let the report go
+uncontradicted, change his name, give up drinking, move away to
+some place where he was not known, and begin his miner's life over
+again. The special correspondent, on being consulted by him,
+assured Mr. Frump that he could depend on his (the correspondent's)
+silence, since it was his invariable practice never to take back or
+qualify any statement made by him--such a course being obviously
+fatal to his hard-earned reputation for accuracy. The correspondent
+also very obligingly supplied him with copies of the papers
+containing the circumstantial accounts of his death, which he
+directed in a disguised hand, and sent through the mail to his
+wife. He had then assumed another name, gone into Benicia County,
+was successful in gold digging, and, after making about two
+thousand dollars, had taken up his residence in the nearest village
+(undesignated), and had invested his money in speculations (kind
+not particularized). Fortune followed him, but he found it
+convenient, for certain reasons (not given), to move away to
+another village, in a few months. In fact, he had, within four
+years, made the entire circuit of California, never staying in one
+place more than a quarter of a year.</p>
+<p>"I don't want to brag," said Mr. Frump, "but it is well enough
+to have it understood that I made my pile."</p>
+<p>Mr. Frump nodded his head quietly, as one who does not lie.</p>
+<p>Old Van Quintem had hitherto hesitated to congratulate Mrs.
+Frump upon the reacquisition of her husband. He now advanced, and
+shook her warmly by the hand.</p>
+<p>"I wish you joy," said he. "And you too, Mr. Frump. I never had
+the pleasure of meeting you often, though I had frequently heard of
+you. With regard to those unpleasant family difficulties in which
+you became involved, they are now at an end; for Gusty's parents
+are both dead, and the old house and farm are sold. Let bygones be
+bygones."</p>
+<p>"So say I, Mr. Van Quintem," said Mr. Frump, grasping the
+extended hand. "As for my wife's relatives, I'm sure I allers
+forgave 'em. As for the old house and farm, if you like, Gusty,
+we'll buy it back agin."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Frump, still resting on her husband's shoulder, sobbed a
+little, and clung closer about him.</p>
+<p>"Here is one friend of the family," continued Amos, in his
+pleasantest manner, pointing to Matthew, "whom I don't know by
+name, though we've scraped an off-hand 'quaintance."</p>
+<p>"Mr. Frump--Matthew Maltboy, Esq.," said old Van Quintem.</p>
+<p>Matthew, like Mrs. Frump, had fully appreciated the awkwardness
+of his situation, and had kept a rigid silence since the returned
+Californian resumed possession of his wife. The minute after Mr.
+Frump's identity had been established, Matthew could have hugged
+him with ecstasy. But, having lost the widow, his fickle mind
+straightway began to discover in her a great many excellencies that
+he had never seen before. Therefore, when he submitted his hand to
+the grip of Mr. Frump, his face expressed a strangely mingled joy
+and regret.</p>
+<p>"I like you," said Mr. Frump, "and, as soon as wifey and I
+commence housekeepin' agin, I'll expect lots o' visits from you.
+Whenever I'm not at home, wifey'll make everything comfortable.
+Won't you, dear?"</p>
+<p>"If you wish it," replied Mrs. Frump, looking up into his face,
+which was not a repulsive one, "for your word shall always be my
+law."</p>
+<p>"I must say," said Matthew, his face exhibiting unqualified
+admiration for Mr. Frump, "that you are the most generous man I
+ever met. And, if Mrs. Frump will promise to introduce me to some
+nice young woman, that she could recommend for a wife, perhaps I'll
+accept your invitation."</p>
+<p>"I'll get you a wife in less than a week," said Mrs. F., who was
+rejoiced that the interview between her recovered husband and late
+suitor had ended peacefully.</p>
+<p>"But one thing you haven't yet explained, Amos," said old Van
+Quintem. "How did you get into Crumley's employment?"</p>
+<p>"Bless your innocent heart, I am not! I arrived this mornin', in
+the steamer----, straight from Aspinwall, with this old scarecrow
+suit on, jest as you see me now. I was intendin' to take the
+railroad for Tioga County, and play off a leetle surprise on Gusty,
+and her relations up there. But, before goin', it 'curred to me to
+call on a Mr. Lambkin, who was raised in Tioga, and keeps a grocery
+store in the lower part of Washington street. I found Mr. Lambkin
+in, and he told me as how, accordin' to last accounts, Gusty was
+stayin' with her uncle Van Quintem. I knowed your address, and come
+up here short metre. I was goin' to pretend that I was a man in
+search of work, and trust to luck to get a sight of Gusty. I found
+your front door open, and walked through the entry to the back
+parlor, where you fust see me standin'. Afore I could ask you for
+any work, you wanted to know if I hadn't been sent to mend your
+piazza railing. It was easy to say 'Yes,' and I said it."</p>
+<p>"And very well you carried out the joke, Amos," said old Van
+Quintem. "You wouldn't make a bad actor."</p>
+<p>"Rather better actor than carpenter, I guess," said Mr.
+Frump.</p>
+<p>"Perhaps so," said old Van Quintem; "but a financier of your
+talent needn't act, or mend railings, for a living. I should like
+to know, now, how you made your money in California. Nine out of
+ten who go there, come back poorer than they went."</p>
+<p>"'Tisn't best to ask too many questions of a returned
+Californian," answered Amos, in perfect good humor.</p>
+<p>"Nor of anybody else, about business matters. You are right,"
+added old Van Quintem.</p>
+<p>"I say to wifey, and to all my friends, 'Let bygones be bygones.
+Take me as you find me, and I'll take you as I find you; and we'll
+ax no questions on either side.'"</p>
+<p>"Dear Amos, you are the best of husbands!" said Mrs. Frump,
+looking fondly in his face. Mr. Frump improved as he was looked
+at.</p>
+<p>"Let bygones be bygones' is a very good rule," said old Van
+Quintem.</p>
+<p>"Mr. Frump," said Matthew, unable longer to repress the
+compliment, "you have a wonderful amount of good sense!"</p>
+<p>"I told you," was the laughing reply, "that 'Amos was sensible
+in some things.'"</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_THIRTEENTH."></a>BOOK THIRTEENTH.</h2>
+<h3>THE STRANGE LADY.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="M_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>A STORY OF THE PAST.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Another year slipped away, and wrought many changes among the
+inhabitants of the block. Some of them had passed from stately
+mansions to those narrow houses which are appointed for all the
+living. Others had wedded, and moved to other blocks which were to
+be their future homes--till the 1st of the following May. Some of
+them had grown rich by quick speculations, and got into the
+choicest society by the simple manoeuvre of taking a four-story
+brownstone front in the avenue which formed the eastern boundary of
+the block. Others had attained to poverty by the same process, and
+had migrated to cheaper lodgings in blocks remote, expecting that a
+lucky turn of Fortune's wheel would bring them back to fashionable
+life next year, as it most likely would. The principal personages
+of this history had been radically affected by this lapse of
+time--as will hereafter be shown--with the single exception of
+Marcus Wilkeson.</p>
+<p>For one year, life had passed tranquilly, uneventfully. He had
+sought, and found, in his dear books, a panacea for that sickness
+of the heart which sometimes attacked him in his lonelier hours. At
+such, times, he would repeat to himself these expressive lines of
+an old poet:</p>
+<blockquote><br>
+This books can do; nor this alone; they give<br>
+New views of life, and teach us how to live;<br>
+The grieved they soothe, the stubborn they chastise;<br>
+Fools they admonish, and confirm the wise.<br>
+Their aid they yield to all; they never shun<br>
+The man of sorrow, or the wretch undone.<br>
+Unlike the hard, the selfish, and the proud,<br>
+They fly not sullen from the suppliant crowd,<br>
+Nor tell to various people various things,<br>
+But show to subjects what they show to kings.</blockquote>
+<br>
+<p>The end of the quiet, sad (but not unpleasantly sad) twelve
+months found Marcus, on a bright morning in the month of August,
+sitting at his window, with a favorite book on his knees,
+looking--where he should not have looked so much--at that window in
+the old house where the only tragedy of his life had been wrought.
+As he gazed, like one fascinated by a spell, his features
+lengthened, and the habitually melancholy expression of his face
+became deepened and confirmed.</p>
+<p>So wrapt was he in these unhappy self-communings, that he did
+not hear a vigorous "rat-tat-tat" on the door of the little back
+parlor. A repetition of the performance aroused him, and to his
+call, "Come in," Mash, the cook, presented herself.</p>
+<p>"A woman at the door wishes to speak to you, sir, on important
+business, she says. Shall I show her in, sir?" Mash laid stress on
+the word "woman," in retaliation for the somewhat peremptory way in
+which the person in question had accosted her at the door. The
+"Buttery and the Boudoir--a Tale of Real Life," afforded her a
+precedent on this point.</p>
+<p>"Show in the lady," said Marcus, wondering who she could be.</p>
+<p>A tall, shapely person, dressed in deep black, and wearing a
+thick veil, was ushered into the room. She bowed slightly, and took
+a seat which Marcus offered her, near the window, and then looked
+significantly at Mash, who lingered in an uncertain way about the
+door.</p>
+<p>"You may shut the door, Mash," said Marcus; and Mash did so with
+a little slam, intended to pierce the heart of the mysterious woman
+in black, for whom that domestic had, in one minute, conceived a
+mortal dislike.</p>
+<p>The strange woman drew back her veil, and revealed a thin, pale
+face, which might have been handsome twenty years back. "Do you
+remember having seen me before?"</p>
+<p>Marcus looked into the thin face with polite scrutiny. "Yes,
+madam," said he, at length. "I think I saw you on a railway train
+in New Jersey, over a year ago; and also in the town of--, in that
+State, on the evening of a certain unfortunate exhibition. But you
+are changed, in some respects, since then."</p>
+<p>"You would say that I am paler and thinner; and I am here to
+tell you why I am, and also to make all the atonement in my power
+for a crime that I have committed."</p>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson's first thought was of the unfathomed murder.
+His startled face expressed what was passing through his mind.</p>
+<p>The strange woman read his thoughts. "The crime to which I refer
+is not the murder of Mr. Minford; of which, I may here say, I
+believed, from the first, that you were entirely innocent.
+Crimes--of that character, at least--have never been known in your
+family."</p>
+<p>"All that you say, taken in connection with some curious
+circumstances which occurred on that railway ride, and that
+memorable night in New Jersey," said Marcus, "make me intensely
+anxious to hear what you have to tell. Please impart the
+information at once, and fully. I call Heaven to witness, that your
+name, your history, the secret which you are to reveal, shall pass
+with me to the grave, if you desire it."</p>
+<p>"I accept your offer," said she, with emotion, "though my crime
+is so flagrant that no publicity, no punishment would be too great
+for it. Still, as full justice can be done, and reparation made,
+without this public disgrace, I prefer that my identity should be
+unknown except to you. I think that I have but few months to live."
+The woman expelled a hacking cough.</p>
+<p>"My story must be short," said she, "and suited to my strength
+and this cough. You probably remember Lucy Anserhoff, who was a
+little playmate of yours in your native village? I see, by your
+nod, that you do. I am--she. You may well look surprised, for there
+is little in my haggard face and wasted form to recall that once
+innocent girl. You remember, I presume, my engagement to your
+brother Aurelius--excuse my faltering, sir, for, even at this
+distance of time, I cannot speak of your dead brother without
+emotion. It is not necessary to recall to your memory the details
+of your brother's conduct to me, and how he afterward
+married--another--and moved to this city. This early portion of my
+unfortunate career is well known to you, as it was to all the
+people of our little village."</p>
+<p>Here the strange visitor paused, and coughed. The cough was dry
+and hollow.</p>
+<p>She continued: "I think I may say that I was amiable and good
+enough, as a child. But your brother's desertion changed my whole
+nature. I dwelt upon one thought--revenge. I shudder as I confess
+it, but, for months, I meditated taking the life of the man who had
+wronged me. I came to this city twice, and lay in wait for him; but
+my heart faltered, and, thank God! I did not commit that crime.
+Soon, Heaven interposed--so it seemed to me at that wicked time--to
+help on my work of vengeance. Your brother's wife died, giving
+birth to a female child. I used to ride into the city twice a week
+regularly after this, and watch for him near his place of business,
+that I might gloat on his pale, unhappy face. I see the look of
+horror with which you receive this part of my confession; but you
+will bear in mind, sir, that I am hero to tell the truth,
+concealing nothing. You remember, sir, the old lines about a woman
+scorned? I, sir, can bear witness to their awful truth."</p>
+<p>Another fit of coughing here interrupted her. At length she
+resumed, in a feebler voice: "I must hasten while I can talk at
+all. One day, while I was watching near your brother's house for
+his appearance, the door opened, and a servant appeared, with a
+child in her arms--his child. The servant walked down the street,
+and I followed her, unobserved, until she came to Washington Parade
+Ground. She entered the park, and took a seat near the fountain. I
+sat down on a bench near her. It was not long before I made the
+girl's acquaintance, and had the child in my arms, caressing it
+with well-counterfeited kindness. Suddenly, the girl recollected
+that she had left the street door of the house unlocked, and was
+afraid that the house, having not a soul in it, would be robbed
+during her absence. She was so much troubled about it, that she
+asked me to hold the child--then about a year old--until she could
+go and lock up the house, and return. A horrible suggestion came
+into my mind, and I took the child in my arms. The servant was no
+sooner out of my sight, than I rose, and, clasping the child
+tightly, walked rapidly in the opposite direction. When I had got
+out of the park, among the side streets near North River, I ran
+until I was tired, turning at every corner, to avoid pursuit. My
+plan was clear from the moment that the child was left in my
+charge. It was, to give her into the keeping of some stranger, and
+so rob the widowed father of his only child. It was a scheme worthy
+of the lost and wretched woman that I then was."</p>
+<p>A fit of coughing here set in, interrupting the narrative for
+several minutes. Marcus offered his strange guest a glass of water.
+She sipped it, until her cough was checked.</p>
+<p>"I wished to make a full and minute statement, sir; but this
+cough again warns me to be very brief. In a word, then, I had not
+gone far, before I saw a German woman--a neat, elderly
+person--sitting on the stoop of her house. An impulse moved me to
+leave the child with her. I accosted her, but she answered me in
+German, saying that she could not speak English. Hardly knowing
+what I did, I mounted the steps, and placed the child in her arms,
+first kissing it. Then I tossed my pocket book, containing about
+twenty dollars, into her lap, and, without another word or act, ran
+off again. As I drew near the next corner, I turned, and saw the
+German woman still sitting on the stoop, looking at the child, and
+then at the money, and then at my flying form, in perfect
+amazement.</p>
+<p>"Well, I returned to my country home in safety. Next day, I saw
+in the New York papers a reward of five hundred dollars for the
+recovery of the child, and the same amount for the arrest of the
+woman who stole it. My person was described, according to the
+recollection of the servant, but so imperfectly that I could not be
+identified. In two weeks I visited the city again, found the house
+where I had left the child--for I had remembered, even in my haste,
+the street and the number. The poor little thing was well, and had
+learned to love its new mother, who, in turn, seemed to love it as
+well as her own two children. I kissed the child, left more money
+with the German woman, and fled again to my home. These visits I
+repeated from week to week for six months, without detection. The
+German woman supposed that I was the mother of the child, but knew
+there was a secret, and did not seek to disturb it. At the end of
+the six months, your--your--brother died." (There was here a slight
+quaver in her voice, almost instantly passing away.) "Soon after
+this, my mother died, and the last of our family estate was spent
+on her burial." (Another tremor in the voice, but brief. The woman
+seemed to have perfect control of her feelings.)</p>
+<p>"Fortunately, I was qualified to earn my living as a seamstress.
+I went to the city, advertised for such a place, and obtained it. I
+visited the child secretly, sometimes, and left money for its
+support and clothing. But the idea of detection and exposure
+troubled me greatly. One day, I read an advertisement from a
+married couple who had no children, offering to adopt a girl under
+two years of age. I answered the advertisement, and thus became
+acquainted with--"</p>
+<p>"I anticipate the disclosure," said Marcus. "Mr. Minford! And
+the poor, dear child is my niece. Heaven be praised, she is found
+at last!"</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="M_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>POSSIBLE LOVE.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>"You have guessed rightly. Miss Minford is your niece. The
+proofs will be found in this packet. They are articles of clothing,
+taken from the child as fast as new ones were supplied, to prevent
+its identification, bearing the initials of Helen Wilkeson. I
+preserved them, with the vague idea of benefiting her by them, some
+day. I have seen the child by stealth a few times since I gave her
+to Mr. and Mrs. Minford, but never called at their house. It was
+agreed between us that I should never make myself known as the
+child's mother, and that they should never seek to learn my name
+and history. I acted as seamstress in several families in this
+city, until, about five years ago, I obtained an engagement in a
+family in New Jersey, living in the very town where that unlucky
+panorama was exhibited. It happened, as you know, that you and I
+rode in the same car from New York, where I had been on a shopping
+excursion. I recognized and was profoundly impressed with your
+resemblance to your brother. Learning that you were connected with
+the panorama, I attended the exhibition, that I might observe you
+more closely. There you were arrested on the charge of murdering
+Mr. Minford--of which, I again say, I always believed that you were
+totally innocent. You may remember that a woman fainted away. I was
+she. The sudden recollection of those two names--Wilkeson and
+Minford--in such a connection, was too much even for my nerves. I
+read the trial with fearful interest, and rejoiced in your release
+from the accusation. Providence at last seemed to point out the way
+to make all the reparation for my crime. I should have done it
+immediately after your acquittal, had I not seen by the papers that
+a wealthy lady--Mrs. Crull--had given your niece a home in her
+family. I postponed this act of justice from one week to another,
+until my failing health warned me that it could not be put off with
+safety longer. I thank Heaven that I have had strength and
+resolution to do it at last."</p>
+<p>"This act of atonement, madam," said Marcus, "entitles you to my
+respect and sympathy. If you ever need a friend, I trust you will
+do me the favor of calling on me."</p>
+<p>"I thank you," she replied; "but I have means enough to support
+me for the remainder of my days, which are numbered. The family in
+which I live, little knowing my true history, are very kind to
+me."</p>
+<p>The protracted conversation had not been closed too soon. A
+violent cough seized upon the poor woman's frame, and shook it like
+a leaf. When it had ceased, Marcus observed that her lips were
+streaked with blood.</p>
+<p>He begged to send for a doctor, but she would not have one, and
+rose to take her leave.</p>
+<p>Marcus insisted, however, upon ordering a carriage for her
+conveyance to the New Jersey Railroad Depot, and she at length
+consented to receive that kindness from him.</p>
+<p>To the driver he whispered words of caution, and instructed him
+to take the lady to a physician, in case she was ill on the
+journey; and, if so, to report, immediately thereafter, to him. He
+then shook her hand frankly, and begged her again to remember that
+he should always be her friend.</p>
+<p>She smiled sadly, as she replied: "Again and again I thank you,
+sir; but it is useless to accept your kind offers, for we are
+meeting for the last time."</p>
+<p>The carriage was driven slowly away.</p>
+<p>The poor woman's word's were true; and Marcus never saw her
+more.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="M_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>UNCLE AND NIECE.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Marcus Wilkeson had seen Pet but twice since the inquest--once
+in Mrs. Crull's carriage, and once afoot, on the opposite side of
+the street. He was delicately conscious that she regarded him with
+distrust or aversion; and, raising his hat politely to her, bowed,
+and passed on. He had expressly enjoined upon Tiffles and Overtop,
+in the communications which they had with her relative to the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener," not to mention his name. He shrank
+from appearing to force himself on her notice.</p>
+<p>The discovery of her real parentage had modified Marcus's
+sensitiveness somewhat. He was now no longer in the ridiculous
+position of a middle-aged, hopeless lover, but was an uncle, with a
+charming niece whom he could honorably love like a father. His
+first impulse, after the departure of the mysterious woman, was to
+hurry around to Mrs. Crull's house, unpack his bundle of proofs,
+and embrace the dear child with avuncular affection.</p>
+<p>Upon him, glowing with this impulse, came the calm, deep
+Overtop, to whom Marcus told the strange story. Overtop listened
+with lawyer-like composure, and, when Marcus had finished, asked
+for the bundle. "The story is likely enough," said he, "but a
+lawyer wants to know all the proofs."</p>
+<p>So saying, he removed from the parcel the string which bound it,
+and which, with the wrapping cloth, had become yellow with age, and
+brought to view a baby's long frock, and a cap made of the finest
+materials, and heavily fringed with lace, and a pair of tarnished
+golden morocco shoes of fairy dimensions. Upon an edge of the dress
+were daintily wrought, in needle work, the initials, H.W. A
+separate package contained extracts from three daily papers, giving
+accounts of the "Mysterious Disappearance of a Child," and an
+advertisement, signed Aurelius Wilkeson, offering five hundred
+dollars for the recovery of his daughter Helen, and describing the
+circumstances of the abduction so far as they were known, and the
+articles of dress which the infant wore at the time.</p>
+<p>"So far, so good," said Overtop; "but it now remains to identify
+the original owner of these baby clothes with Miss Minford. We must
+find some old friends or acquaintances of the late inventor, who
+can testify that he adopted a child during the year 18--."</p>
+<p>Marcus, whose memory was tenacious of names, recollected that
+Mr. Minford, in his few confidential moments, had told him of
+several persons whom he had known in more prosperous days.</p>
+<p>With these memoranda to guide him, Overtop went resolutely to
+work, and, in two days, found four old friends of Mr. and Mrs.
+Minford, who remembered the very year when they adopted an infant
+child. It was the same year that the daughter of Aurelius Wilkeson
+had disappeared. Overtop, being a Notary Public, took the
+affidavits of these persons as he went along.</p>
+<p>Here Overtop would have stopped, and left Marcus to break the
+important news of his new-found relationship to the young lady. But
+Marcus, who had a perfect horror of scenes, begged his friend to do
+this troublesome piece of diplomacy for him, but promised, when it
+was done, to appear at Mrs. Crull's in his new character of
+uncle.</p>
+<p>Overtop performed the difficult task with success. He found Pet
+not altogether unprepared for the discovery. She recalled to mind
+several conversations and significant glances between Mr. and Mrs.
+Minford (the latter died in Pet's twelfth year), in which there was
+an evident allusion to the mystery of her birth. She remembered how
+often persons had expressed surprise that she did not resemble her
+supposed father or mother in the least. She remembered that, on
+those occasions, Mrs. Minford had been much disconcerted; and Mr.
+Minford, remarking that it was a freak of nature, he presumed, had
+always seemed desirous of changing the subject. She remembered that
+this strange want of resemblance to either of her reputed parents
+had often been a puzzle to her before Mrs. Minford's death.</p>
+<p>With regard to Lucy Anserhoff, and the causes which prompted her
+to the abduction of the child. Overtop said nothing; because, among
+other reasons, Marcus, true to his solemn pledge, had told him
+nothing. He explained that the crime had been committed by a person
+who had formerly been a servant in her father's family; and that
+she had made full confession to her uncle, only on condition that
+her name should never be mentioned to any human being.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull, who to a practical mind united a love of the
+romantic and marvellous, accepted Overtop's proofs even more
+readily than Pet. She said she had observed, at the inquest, a
+wonderful resemblance between Mr. Wilkeson and her darling,
+especially in the nose and eyes. Overtop, being appealed to to mark
+the likeness, took an oracular three-quarters view of the young
+lady, and said that the word "niece" was written on her face.</p>
+<p>"He's your uncle, my dear," said Mrs. Crull. "There a'n't no
+doubt o' that. But don't forget that I'm your mother, now."</p>
+<p>Pet kissed Mrs. Crull, and placed her little hand confidingly in
+the large, ineradicably red hand of her protectress.</p>
+<p>"Now that Marcus Wilkeson stands in the relation of uncle to
+you," said Overtop, "there is no harm in telling you something." He
+then broke to her the secret of her uncle's important aid in the
+affair of the "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener"--the sole credit of
+which had always been attributed by Pet and Mrs. Crull to Wesley
+Tiffles and Overtop, agreeably to the wish of Marcus.</p>
+<p>"What a fool I've been," said Mrs. Crull, "to feel the least
+doubt about this excellent man! It was very weak of me, I s'pose,
+Mr. Overtop; but I don't mind tellin' you, that, after what had
+'curred, I thought that Mr. Wilkeson's quaintance with Pet had
+better be stopped. I take all the 'sponsibility of it. We must make
+it up, by thinkin' all the more of him now."</p>
+<p>At the suggestion of Overtop, a servant, with Mrs. Crull's
+carriage, was now sent for Marcus, and soon returned with him.</p>
+<p>When he entered the room, Pet rose, and walked toward him, half
+hesitating. Her face was very pale, and her lips quivered. "My dear
+uncle!" she said, and turned her sweet face up to be kissed.</p>
+<p>Marcus, to whom the probable character of his reception had been
+a distressing subject of conjecture, was delighted at this frank,
+affectionate greeting, and stooped and imprinted an uncle's kiss on
+the young girl's brow. It was a pleasant way out of an
+embarrassment.</p>
+<p>The conflicting emotions of the hour were too much for Pet; and
+she tottered to Mrs. Crull's arms, and wept for a few moments.</p>
+<p>"You are her uncle, Mr. Wilkeson," said Mrs. Crull, extending
+her red right hand, while, with her left, she smoothed Pet's thick
+brown hair, "but I am her mother." Mrs. Crull seized upon this
+early opportunity to give notice that her rights as adopted parent
+were not to be abridged.</p>
+<p>"And happy she is in having such a mother, my dear Mrs. Crull,"
+said Marcus.</p>
+<p>A quick ring, as of a familiar visitor, was heard at the door.
+The servant ushered in Bog. He was much changed since his last
+presentation to the reader. Six months of worldly polish, of
+private tutoring, and of a strong desire to appear well in the eyes
+of one he loved, had turned the clumsy boy into the quiet but
+stylish young gentleman. He had given up the bill-posting business,
+not because he was sick of it, or ashamed of it, but because old
+Van Quintem loved his adopted son so well, that he could not spare
+him from his side. Bog passed the greater portion of every day with
+him, rambling through the streets, or riding to the suburbs in the
+old family carriage, or reading the dear old books to him. Bog read
+well now, and had learned to love those repositories of wit and
+wisdom with almost as keen a relish as the venerable white-headed
+listener. This was another bond of affection between the old
+gentleman and himself.</p>
+<p>At Bog's entrance. Pet looked up, and showed the sparkling tears
+in her eyes. A deep shade of anxiety passed over the young man's
+face, and he looked around for an explanation.</p>
+<p>The prompt Overtop was ready to give it; and, in a few moments,
+Bog was enlightened with the great discovery.</p>
+<p>"And Pet has been crying a little because she is so
+happy--that's all," added Mrs. Crull. "Sit down here, Bog."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull made room for him on the other end of the sofa where
+she was sitting--her left hand still smoothing the soft brown hair
+of her adopted child.</p>
+<p>Bog took the seat, and smiled across the good lady's broad
+figure to Pet, who smiled back at him again.</p>
+<p>This expressive exchange of glances was not lost on Marcus. He
+instantly saw, what he had not divined before, that the devotion,
+the self-sacrifice, the constant, unswerving love of the boy, had
+at last sounded its echo in the bosom of the maiden. As he swiftly
+contrasted the manly, athletic figure of the young man, with the
+delicate beauty of his niece, he thought how well they were adapted
+to each other; and wondered that he could ever have been so blind
+and conceited as to suppose that a nervous old bachelor like
+himself could win the heart of that fresh and youthful image of
+loveliness. And how thankful he then was that he had never, by a
+single word, hinted at the mad love which he once felt for her.</p>
+<p>He had no cause to blush now!</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="BOOK_FOURTEENTH."></a>BOOK FOURTEENTH.</h2>
+<h3>HAPPY DAYS.</h3>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="N_CHAPTER_I."></a>CHAPTER I.</h2>
+<h3>OWNERS OF THE BEAUTIFUL.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>The world and all its inhabitants had rolled round to another
+fragrant spring. The buds were bursting in city parks and gardens,
+and birds twittered in the dusty air. Every happy heart said to
+itself, "This green, and these opening roses, this music of the
+birds, this shining day, this temperate breeze, are all mine, and
+made for me."</p>
+<p>There were two young persons, one sweet morning in May, who
+experienced a delightful sense of that universal proprietorship of
+the Beautiful. They were a couple who appeared to be expressly made
+for each other; for the young man was tall and broad chested, the
+young woman short, and delicately formed; his eyes were black, hers
+blue; he was calm, resolute, deliberate in every movement, she
+quick and impulsive. There never was a clearer case of mutual
+fitness by virtue of entire dissimilarity.</p>
+<p>Any one could see that they loved each other, and that, if they
+were not married, they were engaged--for her little hand was
+entwined most trustingly about his muscular arm, and she leaned
+toward him with that gentle inclination which seems to be a
+magnetism of the heart.</p>
+<p>"Are you happy, my own Pet?" asked the young man, looking
+proudly down at the beautiful face beside him.</p>
+<p>"Happy! dear Bog--for I <i>will</i> always call you Bog. You
+know I am!" Her blue eyes filled with tears.</p>
+<p>If excess of happiness had not choked her voice, she would have
+asked Bog if he thought she could be other than perfectly happy in
+the love of her adopted mother, in the love of her dear uncle--who
+was at once a father and brother in his tender solicitudes--in the
+love of that darling old gentleman, Myndert Van Quintem, and in one
+other love, which it was not necessary to mention.</p>
+<p>But Bog knew that she was supremely happy, and he needed no such
+elaborate answer. He also knew that he possessed the first, fresh,
+and only love that she had ever cherished. All the events in
+connection with her Greenpoint adventure, both before and after it,
+proved that she had never loved young Van Quintem, and that her
+sentiments toward him were only those of gratitude for his supposed
+saving of her life, and an innocent, childlike confidence in his
+good intentions.</p>
+<p>The lovers sauntered down the street slowly, as if they would
+protract the walk. Not another word was said. Passing a garden full
+of roses, Bog reached through the fence, and plucked a full-blown
+white one and handed it to Pet. She eagerly took it, and pinned it
+to the bosom of her dress.</p>
+<p>"Here we are, dearest; and I am almost ashamed to show myself to
+uncle, for I am such a stranger," said Bog, breaking the silence,
+as they stood at the foot of the memorable bell tower. "Hallo,
+Uncle Ith!" he shouted, looking upward.</p>
+<p>The old gentleman thrust his white head out of an open window at
+the top, and said, "All right. Come up."</p>
+<p>The door at the foot of the tower was open, and the young couple
+proceeded to comply with the invitation. Bog led the way, and
+gently dragged Pet from step to step, with much laughter on his
+part, and many charming little feminine screams on her party until
+the trap door was reached. Uncle Ith had combed his hair with his
+five fingers, retied his old black cravat, and put on his coat, to
+receive them. He smiled through the trap door, as they came in
+sight, and said, "Be very careful of the young lady, Bog. Mind,
+now, how the young lady steps."</p>
+<p>Bog jumped through the trap door into the cupola. Then he
+lowered a hand to Pet, and Uncle Ith lent her the same assistance,
+and the two raised the precious burden to a place of safety. Uncle
+Ith, after he had been introduced to Pet, proudly, by his nephew,
+looked at her for a moment in silent admiration. He had never seen
+her before, but he knew her well from Bog's descriptions (hurriedly
+communicated by Bog when they had met in the street), and said to
+himself that the boy had done no more than justice to her rare
+beauty.</p>
+<p>Then Uncle Ith looked at his nephew. "Ah, Bog," said he, shaking
+his head at him, "what changes Time does make! It seems only a few
+days ago that you was a little scrub of a chap, runnin' 'round town
+and pickin' up your livin'. And a very good and honest livin' you
+picked up, too. Now, here you are, a nicely dressed, tall, handsome
+young man, with a snug little fortun' all of your own earnin', not
+to mention your bein' the adopted son of that splendid old
+gentleman, Myndert Van Quintem. And, last and best, you are goin'
+to be married to this dear young lady to-morrer."</p>
+<p>Pet blushed; and Bog said, "That is why we are here to-day, dear
+uncle. We must have you at the wedding."</p>
+<p>Uncle Ith faltered. "Me at Mr. Van Quintem's! I should feel like
+a fish out o' water." He said nothing about the antiquated blue
+coat with brass buttons, the short, black trousers, and the figured
+satin vest, hanging up in a closet at home; but he thought of them,
+and what a stiff figure he would cut in them.</p>
+<p>"But you must come, Uncle Ith!" said Pet, with her sweetest
+smile. "I ask it as a particular favor."</p>
+<p>"You are my only living relative, you know, uncle," added
+Bog.</p>
+<p>"We should not be happy, if you were away," said Pet, placing
+her hand confidingly on the old man's shoulder. Young persons
+always took to the good old man in this spontaneous way.</p>
+<p>The entreaties of the couple, and the continual iteration of
+that name by which he loved to be called--"Uncle Ith"--finally
+overcame his objections. He reconciled himself to the prospect of
+the blue coat, short trousers, and gaudy vest, and solemnly
+promised to attend the wedding.</p>
+<p>This important matter having been settled, Uncle Ith pointed out
+to Pet all the interesting objects to be seen from the tower, and
+adjusted the spyglass for her, and gave her near views of
+Governor's Island, the Palisades, and other remote objects. He also
+explained to her the process of striking the bell by means of the
+long iron lever, and told her that, if she would wait there long
+enough, she could hear how the big chap sounded ten feet away. Pet
+put her hands to her ears, in anticipation of the stunning noise,
+and laughingly said that she didn't think she would wait long.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="N_CHAPTER_II."></a>CHAPTER II.</h2>
+<h3>THE LAST OF A MYSTERY.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>After Pet had looked at all the objects of interest visible from
+the bell tower--Uncle Ith pointing them out with the pride of an
+owner--Bog called Pet aside, and said, "Now, Uncle Ith, I have
+something to show her that I used to think most interesting of
+all."</p>
+<p>Pet rested her hand upon his arm, and gazed through the
+southeastern window, in the direction indicated by Bog's
+forefinger.</p>
+<p>"Right there," said he, "midway between those two tall chimneys,
+and a trifle south of the line of that steeple--the last two
+windows in the upper story of that old house--do you see them?"</p>
+<p>Pet looked along his outstretched arm, to get the precise
+direction, and then said, hurriedly, "It is my old home."</p>
+<p>The sight of those familiar windows, in which the calico
+curtains still hung, recalled the horrid vision of that dreadful
+night. Pet turned pale, and shuddered. "Let us look elsewhere,
+Bog," said she.</p>
+<p>"I beg your pardon, dearest; but I wanted to tell you how many
+hours I had spent in this cupola, day and night, gazing at those
+two windows, and feeling, oh, so happy! if I could but catch a
+glimpse of you or your shadow. But I never told Uncle Ith about
+it."</p>
+<p>Uncle Ith had not overheard this conversation, but he had
+followed with his eyes the direction pointed out by Bog. As the
+young couple stepped back from the window, he said:</p>
+<p>"I see some strange sights occasionally, my children" (he was
+fond of calling young people his children), "I can tell you. There
+are a couple of windows, in the upper story of that old brick
+house, between the two big chimneys, that used to interest me
+some."</p>
+<p>"We see them," said Bog and Pet.</p>
+<p>"About five years back, I began to notice lights burnin' in that
+room, long after all other lights, except the street lamps, was put
+out. Of course, this attracted my attention, and I used to feel a
+queer kind of pleasure in looking into the room with my spyglass,
+and wonderin' what was goin' on there. The curtains were usually
+drawn over the lower sashes; but, this tower bein' fifty or sixty
+feet higher than the house, I could look over the top of the
+curtains, and see somethin'. An old man, tall and slim, and a young
+girl, 'peared to be the only folks that lived there. Are you sick,
+young lady?" said he, observing that Pet looked pale.</p>
+<p>"Oh, no; I am not sick--only a little fatigued."</p>
+<p>"What a brute I was, not to offer you a chair! Now do sit down,
+young lady."</p>
+<p>Pet did so, and Uncle Ith resumed:</p>
+<p>"The old gentleman was a machinist, I s'pose, for I used to see
+his shadow on the wall, goin' through the motions of filin',
+sawin', and hammerin', though I could never guess what he was
+workin' on. I have known him sometimes to be at this queer business
+till daylight. For three years the strange old gentleman never
+missed a night at his work. I fear you are not quite well, young
+lady. Take a glass of water."</p>
+<p>Pet sipped from the proffered glass, and declared that she was
+much better now,</p>
+<p>"One night, about two years ago, I took a look into this room
+with my spyglass. I generally didn't do it until three or four
+o'clock in the mornin', when all the other lights in the
+neighborhood was out. But, on that partickler night, about eleven
+o'clock, I happened to observe that one of the window curtains
+which covered the lower sash was left partly undrawn. This had
+never occurred before, and so I brought my glass to bear on the
+room at once. A tall gentleman, whose face I had often seen movin'
+in the room over the top o' the curtain, was just in the act of
+takin' his departure, which he did without shakin' hands. The old
+man then went to his place at the other window, and tackled to his
+work again. He had been at it about twenty minutes, when a bar, or
+rod, which stuck up above the curtain, and was somehow connected
+with his work, fell forward with a quick motion, as if it was
+jerked away. The old man stooped, picked it up, and fixed it in its
+place again. His face, as well as I could see through my glass in
+the night time, at that distance, showed a wonderful amount of
+surprise and astonishment--at the fall of this rod or bar, I
+s'pose. He then seemed to be filin' on somethin', and afterward
+stooped down, as if to put it into some part of the machine, or
+whatever it was. Jest at that minute the Post Office struck, and I
+put down my glass, and turned my head toward the sound, to catch
+the district. It struck seven. I jumped to the lever, and started
+the old bell for seven, too. As I was strikin' the first round, my
+eyes happened to rest on the strange window again. The old man was
+not standin' there. The bar, or rod, had fallen out of its place
+again, I s'posed, and I expected every minute to see the old man
+appear at the window, and fix it again. But he didn't show himself
+any more that night--and (which is the curious part of my story)
+I've never seen him since. Whether he dropped dead from heart
+disease, I can't guess; but certain I am that he is dead,
+for--"</p>
+<p>Poor Pet here exhibited such signs of faintness, that Bog, who
+had been leaning against the edge of the window, gazing at the
+well-known window with a strange fascination, sprang to her side,
+and instantly bathed her brow with water from Uncle Ith's old
+pitcher, near at hand. This restored her. "Be calm, dearest," said
+Bog.</p>
+<p>"What--what is the matter with the young lady?" asked Uncle Ith,
+in great trepidation. "Shall I run for a doctor?"</p>
+<p>"No, Uncle Ith; no doctor. But we won't talk any more about this
+strange room at present. It affects Miss Wilkeson's nerves."</p>
+<p>"The shock is past, dear Bog," said she, "and I can bear to hear
+everything."</p>
+<p>"But you must promise to control yoursell, darling," said Bog,
+tenderly.</p>
+<p>"One question, Uncle Ith," said he. "How long a time were your
+eyes off the room, after the first stroke for the Seventh
+District?"</p>
+<p>"Not more than three seconds."</p>
+<p>"And you are sure that there was nobody in the room?"</p>
+<p>"Certain; for I must have seen him enter, or go out."</p>
+<p>"Then, Uncle Ith, you have cleared up a great mystery."</p>
+<p>"What! What mystery?"</p>
+<p>"The death of Mr. Minford, the inventor, my old friend, and the
+protector and guardian of Miss Wilkeson. He lived in that very
+room! He was at work on a perpetual-motion machine! It was
+operated, somehow, by weights! It started suddenly, when you saw
+that rod, or lever, fall to the floor! Mr. Minford put the rod in
+its place, and made some little improvement in the works! The
+machine started again at a moment when your eyes were turned away!
+The rod fell with greater violence, struck the inventor on the
+head, and killed him! That is the whole story; and stupid we have
+all been not to have guessed it before."</p>
+<p>Nature furnished her own sweet relief to Pet's pent-up emotions.
+She burst into tears. "Thank Heaven," said she, "it is all plain
+now!"</p>
+<p>Pet had not whispered it to Mrs. Crull, or Bog, or her uncle, or
+to any other living soul, but the mystery of that awful night had
+hung over her young mind like a pall, which in vain she had tried
+to lift.</p>
+<p>"What a blockhead I am," cried Uncle Ith, "not to take the
+papers! If I had only taken the papers, now, I should ha' read all
+about that affair, and might ha' guessed that the man who was
+s'posed to be murdered was the man I had seen workin' in that room
+for three years. Then I should ha' offered myself as a witness, and
+might ha' thrown some light on the business. I'll 'scribe for a
+paper to-day, instead of trustin' to hearsay for the news."</p>
+<p>"And a very neglectful fellow was I," said Bog, "not to have
+called here and seen you, after that sad affair. But the truth was,
+that Pet went to live with her best of friends, Mrs. Crull, and I
+had no longer a desire to look at the room from your bell tower. In
+fact," Bog added, with a smile, "the tower has not been quite as
+interesting for two years past as it used to be. If I had come up
+here at any time since Mr. Minford's death, I should probably have
+told you of the supposed murder, and pointed out those windows to
+you. But--"</p>
+<p>"But you forgot all about your old uncle. Ha! I understand.
+Well, I forgive you, seein' what there was to 'sturb your
+recollections." Uncle Ith looked affectionately at Pet, who smiled
+and blushed through her tears.</p>
+<p>The old man continued: "I 'member once when we met in the
+street, about two years ago--"</p>
+<p>"I used to come around this way, you must know, Uncle Ith, in
+order to meet you, two or three times a week."</p>
+<p>"I give you credit for that, Bog. You never disowned your poor
+old uncle. But, as I was sayin', I 'member one time when we met,
+that you told me somethin' about the murder of somebody of your
+'quaintance. But I didn't take no partickler interest in it,
+because I didn't know any of the parties concerned. And, of course,
+I didn't dream that poor Mr. Minford was the man I had seen workin'
+away there for three years. But the main fault is mine, because I
+don't take the papers. I see, now, that every man ought to take the
+papers--if only as a duty to his feller man." Uncle Ith coughed, as
+one who utters a maxim of great moral depth.</p>
+<p>It was then agreed, at Bog's suggestion, that Uncle Ith,
+accompanied by him, should call at Overtop's office, at early
+business hours (when Uncle Ith was off duty), next day, and consult
+upon the best course to be adopted to make his testimony public,
+and set the mystery of Mr. Minford's death forever at rest.</p>
+<p>This having been done, Bog and Pet withdrew, and had hardly
+reached the foot of the tower, when the musical thunder of the
+great bell announced the constantly reiterated story of a fire in
+the Seventh--that most combustible of all the city districts.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="N_CHAPTER_III."></a>CHAPTER III.</h2>
+<h3>LOVE CROWNED.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Late on a fair afternoon of May, wedding guests began to
+assemble at old Van Quintem's house. The old gentleman had been out
+of society many years; and he improved this happy occasion to bring
+together his few surviving relatives, and friends of his former
+business days.</p>
+<p>Heavy antique carriages rolled up to the door, with retired
+merchants and their wives. The retired merchants were of a pattern
+not altogether extinct in New York, who, at the ages of sixty years
+and upward, had cleared their skirts of business, and settled down
+to a calm retrospect of the past, and serene anticipations of the
+future. They were evidently destined for a good old age, and had
+fat pocket books to help them through. The proper place to look for
+this class of retired merchants is on the tax books, and not in
+public assemblies, or among the Directing Boards of benevolent
+institutions. They are good, charitable souls; but, having got out
+of business, they desire to keep out of it literally, leaving to a
+younger generation the task of managing men and affairs.</p>
+<p>A more stylish vehicle deposited at the door a bachelor Bank
+President, who was not only the old personal friend of the host,
+but his trusted adviser in business affairs. The parlor of the ----
+Bank was one of the few places that old Van Quintem still visited
+in the bustling haunts of the city; and to old Van Quintem's house
+the bachelor Bank President made monthly pilgrimages of friendship.
+He was a handsome man of fifty, with long white hair, which matched
+beautifully with his yet ruddy cheeks, and a figure portly and full
+of strength. Nobody but himself knew why so eligible a man remained
+a bachelor.</p>
+<p>In a humpbacked chaise drawn by an exemplary horse, there rode a
+fat and pleasant old gentleman, who was uncomfortably swathed about
+the neck with a white cravat. He crawled from his narrow coop with
+the nimbleness of one who is on professional business. He was
+followed by his wife, a little woman, who was the mother of ten
+children from two to twenty years of age--just two years apart, and
+all strongly resembling their father. This fat, pleasant old
+gentleman was the old-fashioned minister of the old-fashioned
+church to which Mr. Van Quintem had belonged for forty years. The
+little woman was his second wife; and there was a first crop of
+children, who had been safely launched on the world for many years,
+and were doing extremely well.</p>
+<p>The sole surviving relatives of old Van Quintem were three
+elderly ladies, who, by some contagious fatality, remained
+unmarried. After pining romantically over their doom for some time,
+they had settled down to the conviction that they were much happier
+single than wedded, and that they had escaped a great many dangers
+and disappointments--which was unquestionably true. It was really
+pleasant for them to reflect that the snug property which their
+father left them had not been squandered upon designing husbands,
+but had been kept, improved, and added to, until it was one of the
+prettiest estates on Staten Island. These ladies were first cousins
+of old Van Quintem, and had an odd habit of staying at home. They
+came to New York always on important business, which could not be
+transacted by any one else, four times a year; and, on those
+occasions, paid state visits to old Van Quintem, who reciprocated
+the civility by calling on them, in a ceremonial way, twice every
+summer.</p>
+<p>Uncle Ith came on foot; and wore his old blue coat with brass
+buttons, his flowered vest, and shining trousers so awkwardly, that
+people who did not know him stared at him as at a strange
+spectacle. People--and they were many--who did know him, stared at
+him with a still greater surprise, wondering what extraordinary
+event in his history was about to occur. Uncle Ith felt the
+additional embarrassment of fame, or notoriety; for an affidavit,
+prepared by Overtop, giving the full particulars of his
+observations from the bell tower, had been published in all the
+city papers that morning. Before noon, Uncle Ith had been waited on
+by six newspaper reporters, to whom he had furnished particulars of
+his early life; and had promised to sit for his photograph, for the
+use of an illustrated weekly, on the following day. For all these
+reasons, added to his natural modesty, he pulled the door bell with
+a feeling of profound regret, which was followed by a strange
+desire to run around the corner. Before this desire could have been
+gratified, the door was opened by a servant, and Uncle Ith was
+ushered in.</p>
+<p>The anticipated awkwardness of an introduction to old Van
+Quintem, was prevented by the approach of that gentleman before his
+name was announced.</p>
+<p>"Welcome! welcome!" said he, shaking him by the hand with Dutch
+fervor. "I know you from Bog's description, you see. Your statement
+in the morning papers has lifted a load from several hearts, I can
+tell you. Bog will be delighted to see you. He was beginning to be
+afraid you would not come. Hallo, Bog!" said, the good old
+gentleman, shouting up the stairs; "here is Uncle Ith."</p>
+<p>The bridegroom bounded down the stairs with boyish impetuosity,
+looking so fine that Uncle Ith hardly knew him. It was difficult to
+realize that the ungainly, ignorant boy of a few years back, had
+become this nice-looking, graceful young gentleman. Thus readily
+does the rough diamond of a good heart and brain, under the guiding
+hands of Ambition and Love, take its polish from contact with the
+world and with society!</p>
+<p>"Dear Uncle Ith!" said the bridegroom.</p>
+<p>"Happy to see you, Uncle Ith!" exclaimed Fayette Overtop, who,
+with Marcus Wilkeson and Matthew Maltboy, had been drawn from the
+second floor at the mention of his name.</p>
+<p>Marcus had not before seen Uncle Ith, though he had been
+thinking of him all day. The publication of the old man's affidavit
+was an entire surprise to Marcus--Overtop and Maltboy having said
+nothing to him about it. Other people read the document with
+interest, because it solved a mystery. But to Marcus it wore the
+profounder, vastly greater importance of clearing the last shadow
+of foul suspicion from his name. It may be unnecessary to say, that
+it also gave rise to learned and interesting, but profitless
+discussions, in several of the papers, upon the possibilities of
+perpetual motion--which lasted until the explosion of a steam
+boiler under the pavement turned every editor to the consideration
+of steam boilers, their nature and habits, the rights of owners and
+of the public, and the necessity of stringent legislation for the
+better management of those subterranean powers of good and
+evil.</p>
+<p>Upon being introduced to Uncle Ith, Marcus gave the old man's
+hand a warm pressure, but said nothing. But Uncle Ith saw in his
+eyes an expression of the deepest gratitude, and he knew what it
+meant; for he had read the report of the inquest at Overtop's
+office, and there learned, for the first time, the unhappy
+connection of Marcus Wilkeson with the Minford affair.</p>
+<p>Maltboy, who, being one of the appointed groomsmen of the day,
+was in extraordinary spirits, was profuse in his congratulations to
+Uncle Ith, and insisted, rather unnecessarily, upon introducing him
+to the retired merchants and the bachelor Bank President. They had
+all read his affidavit, and regarded him with undisguised
+interest.</p>
+<p>For a man who has always been a lamb in his shyness and
+self-depreciation, to find himself suddenly transformed into a
+lion, is a cause of no little embarrassment. Uncle Ith was so much
+flustered by all these tokens of popularity, that he could not
+utter an articulate word, but only mumble, and wipe his heated
+brow. He wished that the usages of society would permit him to take
+off his coat, as he did in the bell tower, and be comfortable.</p>
+<p>A few more guests arrived, mostly of the ancient order, and a
+little too much of one sort to please a lover of variety. The
+advent of Mr. Frump, with all his impulsive occidental
+peculiarities of character fresh upon him, was a decided relief to
+the decorous company already assembled in the parlors. In less than
+ten minutes, he was on terms of off-hand friendship with everybody,
+and was telling strange stories of Western adventure to a group of
+eager listeners.</p>
+<p>Old Van Quintem received all his guests with that simple
+cordiality which leaves no doubt of a sincere welcome. The common
+remark was, "How well you are looking, Mr. Van Quintem!" And it was
+very true. Few men at seventy could show a figure so straight,
+cheeks so smooth, and an eye so bright. The unavailing sorrow which
+tenanted his heart two years before, had gradually disappeared.
+From the hour that his son fled abashed from his presence, he had
+not seen or heard of him, and had at last come to regard him as
+dead--though the old gentleman could not have given a good reason
+for that singular belief, except that his son had been a constant
+cause of sorrow and trouble to him when alive. He preferred to
+think of the lost son not as the ripened villain, but as the
+innocent child prattling upon its mother's knee. This mental
+picture filled a select chamber of the old man's memory. But the
+affection and reverential duty of a son had been supplied by the
+boy Bog; and, in the virtuous character and filial love of that
+young man, he saw what the innocent child might have grown to, had
+all his prayers and tears been answered.</p>
+<p>When old Van Quintem's wishes were consulted with regard to the
+wedding, he had but one favor to ask; and that was, that the
+ceremony might take place at his house. It was a whimsical idea, he
+said, but he would like to see his old home gay once more, as it
+used to be years ago. "Besides," said he, "I am rheumatic, and
+might not be able to attend the wedding, if held elsewhere."</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull, when she first heard, from the lips of the blushing
+Pet, that Bog had proposed and been accepted, immediately outlined
+the plan of a wedding at her house, which should be something
+unprecedented in point of magnificence. The plan took shape as she
+thought of it, and she had already settled upon the number of
+invitations, and the other principal arrangements, when old Van
+Quintem's wish was mentioned to her. The sacrifice was a great one;
+and Mrs. Crull would make it only on condition that she should
+superintend the preparations with the same freedom as at her own
+house. Old Van Quintem consented to this, only stipulating that he
+should pay all the bills; and, for over a week before the wedding,
+Mrs. Crull, assisted by that most buxom and busy of women, Mrs.
+Frump, had taken tyrannical possession of the dwelling, and made
+such extraordinary transpositions of the carpets and pictures, and
+other movable property, that old Van Quintem, on surveying the work
+of renovation, hardly recognized the house as his own. The only
+apartment that was not inwardly transformed by these female
+magicians was the library. To that he clung, conscious that both
+his services and his advice were of no value.</p>
+<p>The house was soon filled with guests--or rather appeared to be
+filled, for the whole number invited and present was only forty.
+But forty people, moving about uneasily, and expecting something,
+look like a hundred or more. Among them were many whose only claim
+to an invitation was their friendship for the host, or Mrs. Crull,
+or the bride, and not any mental, moral, or physical excellence
+which entitles them to mention in this history.</p>
+<p>There were two rooms on the second floor, upon which the
+interest of loungers, male and female, was concentrated.</p>
+<p>In one waited the bridegroom, his groomsmen Overtop and Maltboy,
+Marcus Wilkeson and Wesley Tiffles. They were a happy party, and
+not at all frightened at the approaching nuptials. Bog--for such
+his friends always did, should, and will call him--could not have
+been happier--far from it!--if he had held a sceptre in each hand.
+Overtop was happy in the contemplation of his marriage with that
+most sensible of girls, Miss Pillbody, which was set down for the
+week following. The affair would have come off six months before,
+but for Miss Pillbody's illness, happening soon after her mother's
+death. In consequence of this illness, her select school had been
+given up--never to be revived. Poor Overtop did not know how much
+he loved her, until he saw how near he came to losing her. She had
+completely recovered, was ruddy and pretty with new health, and was
+Pet's first bridesmaid. Overtop thought pleasantly of her, and
+combed back his intractable cowlick. Matthew Maltboy was happy
+because he had taken a serious fancy to Miss Trapper, the second
+bridesmaid, a charming but peculiar girl, and the particular
+juvenile friend of Mrs. Frump. Matthew had met this young lady two
+or three times, and had suffered sweetly from her black eyes.
+Marcus Wilkeson was happy in his contented bachelorhood, in the
+happiness of his niece and of all around him, and in the clearing
+up of the "Minford enigma." Wesley Tiffles was happy because
+happiness was his constitutional disposition, under all
+circumstances and in all weathers. The arrival of Uncle Ith was the
+only event that had drawn this good-natured party from their
+retreat; and those who watched for their reappearance were
+disappointed.</p>
+<p>In the other room, the bride had been dressing for several
+hours, and was still hard at it, under the immediate supervision of
+the indefatigable Mrs. Crull, Mrs. Frump, and the two bridesmaids.
+Only the favored few were admitted to this retreat of mysteries.
+But they were kindly communicative. They brought back minute
+reports of the appearance and condition of the bride elect, in the
+various stages of her enrobement and ornamentation; and there was
+not a woman in the house who did not, every ten minutes, have the
+image of Helen Wilkeson stamped on her mind as accurately as the
+changeful phases of an eclipse on the photographer's plate.</p>
+<hr style="width: 25%;">
+<p>At the soft, calm, mystic, love-making, marrying twilight hour,
+the bridal party took their stand near the southern end of the
+great double parlor. The forty guests were grouped before them, an
+audience without seats.</p>
+<p>Pet was pale, and leaned for support on Bog's arm. He stood
+firm, erect, unblenching, with that instinct of physical strength
+which one feels when the woman that he loves hangs confidingly on
+his arm. Fayette Overtop, with his well-known dislike for
+conventionalism, was thinking how tedious all that formality was,
+and how much more sensible to be married by an alderman or justice
+of the peace, privately, in two minutes. Miss Pillbody did not
+agree with her future husband on this point, and was thinking, at
+that very moment, what a solemn thing marriage was, and with what
+ceremonious deliberation it ought to be entered upon. Matthew
+Maltboy had had great experience as a groomsman, and he speculated
+with perfect composure on this important question: Whether the
+gentle tremor of Miss Trapper's hand was caused altogether by the
+fluttering novelty of her situation, or partly by the
+love-enkindling contact of their interlocked elbows?</p>
+<p>As the six took their chosen positions, and gazed at a
+particular pattern in the carpet, selected by them at a private
+rehearsal in the morning, they were the subject of mental comment
+by the forty guests. The women, looking at the costly dress of the
+bride, pronounced her beautiful. The men, never noticing her dress,
+but observing her pale face and heavy eyes, were not vividly
+impressed with her loveliness. Bog was admired by all, and envied
+by none to whom his history was known. The old ladies took a mild
+maternal interest in him, because he was an orphan; and the young
+ladies thought extremely well of him, because he was a strong,
+gallant, handsome fellow. Overtop was regarded with curiosity, as
+the reputed hero of the Slapman scandal. Matthew Maltboy was
+universally condemned as too fat, and, with that brief criticism,
+was dismissed. Miss Pillbody was pronounced "a little proud,"
+because she stood straight, with shoulders thrown back, which was
+her usual attitude. Miss Trapper was admitted to be a very modest
+and diffident creature, because she had a slight stoop in the back,
+which was chronic.</p>
+<p>Old Van Quintem stood near the wedding party, and recalled, with
+fond minuteness, the hour when one, about the same age as Pet, and
+resembling her in the freshness of her youthful beauty, had crowned
+him with happiness. Mrs. Crull was close by, and looked at the
+bride, whom she had dressed, with the pride of an artist. Mrs.
+Frump stood next to her, and shared in the same sentiments. Marcus
+Wilkeson's appointed place was somewhere in the neighborhood of the
+bride; but he shrank away to the side of Uncle Ith, who also
+obstinately clung to the other end of the room.</p>
+<p>The venerable clergyman stepped into the centre of the small
+open space which had been left in front of the bridal party, and
+uttered a cough, at which signal the buzz of conversation
+ceased.</p>
+<p>The ceremony was very brief and simple--according to the ritual
+of the Dutch Church--and people were married by it before they knew
+it. The minister had received, in advance, a fee of unprecedented
+size, which was, at that moment, lying at the bottom of his wife's
+pocket, and which that good woman had already spent, in
+imagination, on a new bonnet for herself, a new hat for the
+minister, dresses for the girls, books for the boys, and playthings
+for the baby. If the dimensions of the fee had any effect whatever
+on the mind of the excellent minister, that effect was to hurry up
+the ceremony, and make the two one with the least possible
+delay.</p>
+<p>At last the magical, binding words were spoken; and the husband,
+stooping proudly to the not-averted face of his blushing wife, gave
+her the first kiss. And at the same instant a little band of
+musicians, with chosen instruments, secretly stationed in the
+library, of which the door was now thrown open, struck up
+Mendelssohn's divine Wedding March. As its jubilant notes floated
+through the house, the round of congratulations commenced.</p>
+<p>Blest Pet! What had she ever done--she thought, so far as giddy
+happiness would allow her to think--to merit all these kisses (of
+which her two shy uncles bestowed two), these benedictions, these
+tears, and, above all, the possession of this noble heart by her
+side, henceforth to be all her own? The exultant peals of the
+Wedding March--that highest expression of triumphal love--but
+faintly interpreted her joy.</p>
+<p>The bridegroom received his full share of the universal good
+wishes. Everybody was pleased with his behavior; and the bachelor
+Bank President, and other members of the old school of gentlemen,
+pronounced him a glorious young fellow, a refreshing contrast to
+the puny, cadaverous youth of the day, and altogether worthy to
+have flourished thirty years ago. The bridesmaids and groomsmen
+were not neglected either; and both Miss Pillbody and Miss Trapper
+thought that the next best thing to getting married, was to assist
+others in the operation.</p>
+<p>As for old Van Quintem, after kissing the bride, and calling Bog
+his son, and giving both of them his blessing, he had retired from
+the room to hide the tears of happiness which not even seventy
+years of this hardening world could keep from his eyes.</p>
+<p>For the second time in five minutes, Amos Frump approached
+Matthew Maltboy, and shook hands with him. "Fat and jolly as ever,"
+said he.</p>
+<p>From the first adjective Matthew recoiled; though he tried to
+justify the propriety of the second by a laugh.</p>
+<p>"And I like you--hang me if I don't!" said Mr. Frump, with
+California bluntness, "<i>because</i> you're fat and jolly. But
+here's wifey, and I know she wants to say somethin' to you."</p>
+<p>"So I do," said Mrs. Frump. "My head was so full of business
+to-day, that I had quite forgotten it. But you must step aside with
+me," she added, looking significantly at Miss Trapper.</p>
+<p>Matthew stepped aside; and she placed her lips to his ear, and
+whispered, "What do you think of Miss Trapper?"</p>
+<p>"A very pretty girl," said Matthew.</p>
+<p>"So she is; and one of the best-hearted creatures that ever
+lived. A little singular in one respect, perhaps."</p>
+<p>"What is that?"</p>
+<p>"Oh! she speaks out her mind--that's all. But then you always
+know where to find her."</p>
+<p>"She has not spoken any of it to me, at all events," said
+Matthew. "I can't get her to talk."</p>
+<p>"That's because she's modest. Cultivate her, and you'll find her
+a splendid girl. Between you and me, I have recommended you to her,
+and, depend upon it, she will meet you halfway."</p>
+<p>"All right," whispered Matthew, gratefully.</p>
+<p>Here the full voice of old Van Quintem announced dinner, for
+which the elderly ladies had been demurely waiting for some time.
+Two by two the bridal party and the guests marched to the banquet,
+spread in the long, broad dining room, which was one of the best
+features of this sturdy, old-fashioned house.</p>
+<p>What the bill of fare was; what tunes the band played in the
+library; what kind things were said to the bride and bridegroom;
+what compliments were breathed into young female ears, and not
+rebuked; what vows of love were exchanged; what courteous remarks
+of the old school were made by the bachelor Bank President; what
+ancient jokes were passed off by the wits of the party as new; what
+abominable conundrums were then and there honestly invented; what
+overwhelming confusion Uncle Ith experienced, when he found himself
+seated next to a lady who talked loud at him, and how he wished
+himself at home, one hundred feet from the ground; what complete
+happiness was felt and expressed by everybody, but especially by
+old Van Quintem and Marcus Wilkeson; what improbable stories were
+told by Mr. Frump; what philosophical sayings uttered on the spur
+of the moment by Fayette Overtop; what slightly impertinent but
+always amiable remarks advanced by Wesley Tiffles;--all this might
+be imagined, with a slight mental effort; but not so Matthew
+Maltboy's new misfortune.</p>
+<p>Profiting by Mrs. Frump's friendly suggestion, Matthew had
+exhausted all his resources of conversation in an effort to
+interest Miss Trapper. She had listened, and had returned
+faultlessly proper replies, and had conducted herself so much like
+all the other young women that Matthew had ever met, that he was
+puzzled to guess in what respect her singularity consisted. He
+longed to see a piece of that mind, which, according to Mrs. Frump,
+she was in the habit of exhibiting to people. He was soon
+gratified.</p>
+<p>Miss Trapper had remarked, that, in a few days, she was going to
+visit her friends in Chemung County, and would probably remain
+there three months. It struck Matthew as the right time to make a
+point.</p>
+<p>"Then I shall not see you, Miss Trapper, during all that time!"
+he said, with a sigh.</p>
+<p>Miss Trapper levelled a sharp glance at him, and said, "I
+suppose not."</p>
+<p>The remark was tartly made; but Matthew had noticed that she
+habitually spoke quick and short.</p>
+<p>"Our acquaintance has thus far been very pleasant, Miss Trapper;
+at least on my side," whispered Matthew. "Must it stop here?"</p>
+<p>To which Miss Trapper replied, "I don't know."</p>
+<p>Though the observation was not encouraging, it was, on the other
+hand, not entirely forbidding.</p>
+<p>"Since we are to be separated for three months, Miss Trapper,
+might I solicit the great privilege of corresponding with you
+occasionally?"</p>
+<p>Miss Trapper's thin lips expelled two words, like shot out of a
+gun: "What for?"</p>
+<p>"What for?" echoed the amazed Matthew. "Why--for the pleasure of
+exchanging our ideas, you know."</p>
+<p>"That would be a bore," said Miss Trapper.</p>
+<p>"I didn't understand you," said Matthew, distrusting his
+ears.</p>
+<p>"I said it would be a bore--a bore!" returned Miss Trapper, with
+painful distinctness. "I hate letter writing."</p>
+<p>"Oh! ah! Do you?" said Matthew, feebly. "Perhaps you would like
+some pickled cauliflower, Miss Trapper?"</p>
+<p>"Thank you."</p>
+<p>Matthew handed the pickled cauliflower to her, and held his
+tongue, satisfied with what he had seen of Miss Trapper's
+singularity, and not at all anxious to receive a larger piece of
+her mind.</p>
+<p>"I am doomed to be a bachelor," thought Matthew, with a
+suppressed groan. But Hope, which attends upon fat and lean men
+alike, whispered in his mind's ear, "Why not marry a woman as fat
+as yourself?"</p>
+<p>"A capital idea!" thought Matthew "and if there's no other way
+to find one, I'll advertise for her."</p>
+<p>Dinner was protracted to a length that seemed tedious to all but
+the representatives of the old school. When it did come to an end,
+the party adjourned to the parlors, where a reasonable time was
+devoted to conversation and flirtation. At length the musicians,
+having taken their wedding dinner in their apartment, and drank
+full bumpers (which, somehow, never interfere with the accuracy of
+musical performances) to the health of the happy pair, struck up a
+quadrille, which was at once interpreted by the younger people as a
+signal for dancing. Two sets were instantly formed, and rattled
+through with. The Lancers followed, and was liked so much that the
+musicians were called upon to repeat it three times. The sets had
+now increased to four, filling the two parlors, and crowding the
+elderly people to the wall or the hallway. Then, luckily, old Van
+Quintem bethought himself of the old-fashioned contra-dance, as a
+contrivance for bringing his contemporaries on their legs. By an
+extraordinary piece of good fortune, the musicians had learned it,
+and played it at a silver wedding the week previous.</p>
+<p>As the familiar notes, not heard for years, saluted the ears of
+the bachelor Bank President, he showed the animation of an old
+war-horse at the sound of the trumpet. "Now is our time," said
+he.</p>
+<p>Moved by common impulse, the members of a past generation rose,
+and took their places. Old Van Quintem, temporarily forgetting his
+rheumatism, led off, escorting Mrs. Crull. The bachelor Bank
+President took charge of a widow, in whose breast he had revived
+feelings that flourished twenty years before. The retired merchants
+brought each other's wives upon the floor. Even Uncle Ith came out
+from his seclusion in a corner, where he had been listening to the
+sound of his own fire bell, rung by other hands that night, and
+felt that here, at least, he should make no blunders. The tall,
+talkative lady, from whom there seemed to be no escape, had
+fastened on him as a partner. The good clergyman was the only old
+or middle-aged gentleman who did not take his place in the set, and
+he looked on and laughed.</p>
+<p>The dance commenced, slow at first, then gradually faster. The
+younger people, when they came to understand the simple movement,
+fell into the chain couple after couple, until it extended into the
+hallway, and through it into the parlors again. Everybody was drawn
+in now, old and young, married and unmarried, the minister and his
+wife only excepted, and they marked the measure with their heels.
+Round and round, and faster and faster, went the chain, with its
+constantly changing links. The musicians, playing the same strains
+over and over again, became frenzied by the repetition, and doubled
+the time without knowing it. Legs that had entered slow and stately
+upon the interminable maze, became, without the knowledge or
+consent of their owners, nimble and gymnastics.</p>
+<p>It was a delightful peculiarity of this wonderful dance, that
+couples could withdraw without breaking up the figure. The bride
+and groom, acting upon this privilege, slipped out of the flying
+circle, and sought, unaccompanied, the solitude of the vine-covered
+piazza behind the house, there to commune for a moment upon their
+new-found happiness.</p>
+<hr style="width: 25%;">
+<p>The night was calm. A faint breeze from the south stirred up
+secret odors in the hearts of dew-covered flowers, and musically
+sighed through the leaves and vines. The heavens were dark, but
+unclouded; and, as the lips of the lovers met in one clinging kiss,
+the host of stars beamed down upon them, and proclaimed an ETERNITY
+OF LOVE.</p>
+<br>
+<br>
+<hr style="width: 35%;">
+<br>
+<br>
+<h2><a name="N_CHAPTER_IV."></a>CHAPTER IV.</h2>
+<h3>FIVE YEARS.</h3>
+<br>
+<p>Five years are an eventful space in the history of blocks, as of
+men. Within that period, they may be burnt down, blown down, or
+torn down to make room for grander blocks. In quick-growing
+American cities, the average life of blocks is less than that of
+the human generation that tenants them. First wood, then brick,
+then brownstone or marble--these are the successive forms of block
+life, before anything like stability is reached. Marble is the only
+real type of the permanent in American architecture. Nobody pulls
+down marble.</p>
+<p>But five years had made little change in the exterior of our
+block. It was situated at a point in the city from which the ebb
+tide of Fashion was slowly receding, and which the flood tide of
+Trade had not yet touched. There was not a new house on the block,
+or an old one materially altered. A little paint, and a diligent
+application of broom and Croton water, had kept the block quite
+fresh and jaunty. On the south side there were some slight external
+modifications, in the shape of oblong black signs, fastened near
+basement doors, and bearing names of doctors. Ten of these signs
+had been added to the south side within five years. There were only
+two houses upon that side, now, to which you could come amiss in
+pursuit of medical advice.</p>
+<p>One of these was old Van Quintem's. Five years had passed over
+the old house and the old man lightly (both had been made to last,
+and were well taken care of), and gave to them only a mellower and
+riper look. The old man's long white hair had not commenced falling
+out; and his cheeks still bloomed with a ruddiness that does not
+belong to second childhood. He could still read his dear old
+books--and carefully chosen new ones--without spectacles; though he
+often preferred to hear them read in a soft, sweet tone, by a dear
+girl whom he always called Pet, and who would sit for hours at the
+old man's feet, giving to the noble thoughts of poet, novelist, or
+philosopher, the added charm of a sympathetic voice. At such times,
+a fine fellow, who was still known as Bog, would look on and
+listen, with rapt attention, and the happiest smile on his face.
+Sometimes these tranquil scenes would be pleasantly broken in upon,
+and the meaning of the author profitably obscured, by the entrance
+of a certain little Helen, whom the old man would kiss, and call
+"Grandpop's sugarp'um," and "Sweety peety." Bog would then catch it
+up, and toss it aloft, all whirling with curls, laces, and blue
+ribbons, and would say, "Cud-je-wod-je now, cud-je-wod-je now,
+cud-je-wod-je now," at each tossing; and the child, with the
+marvellous instinct of eighteen months, would understand this
+mysterious dialect, and then would smile through large blue eyes
+that looked like its mother's.</p>
+<p>To this house, Myndert Van Quintem, jr., had never returned; and
+no authentic intelligence of him had ever come. Fayette Overtop,
+Esq., while on a professional visit to St. Paul, Minnesota, to
+settle a large land claim, had heard of a notorious Van Benton, who
+had kept a gambling house there several years, and was finally
+killed by a spendthrift whom he had cleaned out of his last cent
+one night. The best description which he could get of this man,
+tallied precisely with that of Myndert Van Quintem, jr. But
+Overtop, with that discretion which was continually enlarging his
+circle of paying practice, said nothing of this to the old
+gentleman. Among the reports that Overtop had heard of this Van
+Benton, was one, that he had forged his father's signature to large
+amounts in New York city, and had fled to the West, and there
+changed his name to avoid the arrest and punishment which his
+father had promised him. Had the old gentleman been informed of
+this circumstance, he would at once have identified Van Benton as
+his son; for it was known to him alone, that young Myndert had
+repeatedly forged his name (evidences of which had been found in
+the desk where Marcus Wilkeson had often seen the young man busily
+writing--evidences which the forger had accidentally omitted to
+burn), and that he had been induced to leave the city through fear
+that his father would give him up to justice at last. On the
+memorable night in the milliner's shop in Greenpoint, the young
+profligate had seen that his father was terribly in earnest, and
+had quailed in the presence of that outraged and indignant
+soul.</p>
+<p>The second house not ornamented by a doctor's sign, on the south
+side of the block, was the old tenement building of which Mr.
+Minford had occupied the upper story, five years before. The
+tenants had all been changed two or three times; but the "Minford
+tragedy" was still a current legend among them. Murders, or strange
+homicides, are fixtures of houses where they occur. Nothing
+obliterates their memory but tearing down the houses, and building
+anew--which is the course of treatment that the proprietor was
+proposing to himself, in consequence of the steady depreciation of
+rents. Pet never passed that house, or dared to look at it even
+from a distance.</p>
+<p>Bachelors' Hall, on the north side of the block, was still
+occupied by the three original tenants; and they liked it so well,
+that they had bought it, and owned it on the Tontine plan--viz.,
+that, upon the death of one of the owners, his share shall go to
+the survivors.</p>
+<p>Five years had improved Marcus Wilkeson's relish for a good
+book, an after-dinner pipe, and a chat with a friend. It was plain
+to all his friends--even to those who were happiest in their wedded
+lives--that Marcus was a great deal better off single than married.
+His was the genial monkish nature, which thrives best in
+celibacy.</p>
+<p>Every afternoon Marcus visited his white-haired neighbor
+opposite, and never forgot to take along a toy, or some candy, for
+his grandniece Helen. He brought these offerings in lieu of baby
+talk, which he could never master. This fact pointed him out,
+beyond all question, as a predestined old bachelor.</p>
+<p>The general supervision of the house was intrusted to Mrs.
+Overtop; and most sensibly did she manage it. Knowing that a bar of
+cast iron is more easily bent than the set habits of men of
+twenty-five and upward, she attempted no changes in the domestic
+regulations of the establishment. The three friends found that they
+had not only all of their old freedom, but a charming female voice
+to accompany them in their songs, and on the piano or guitar, and a
+capital fourth hand at whist, and a beautiful reader, and an
+ever-cheerful companion. "If I could find such a wife, now!" Marcus
+and Maltboy would say. "But you can't," Overtop would answer.
+"There's not another like her in this world." There was a little
+Fayette Overtop, jr., two years old, a great pet of the bachelors,
+and the far-off husband of little Helen, on the other side of the
+block.</p>
+<p>Matthew Maltboy weighed two hundred and twenty pounds. As
+associate counsel of Overtop, he made an imposing show in court,
+which was not fully borne out by his legal attainments. He was
+always talking of matrimonial intentions--a sure sign that a man
+never will be married. His last rebuff from Miss Trapper (now the
+wife of a wealthy tanner and currier) had taught him to keep his
+flirtations within narrower limits; but he openly professed, and
+probably believed, that, when he really wanted to marry--without
+joking, you know--he could take his pick from the wide and varied
+ranges of female society. He smoked incessantly like a martyr, to
+reduce his flesh, but no adipose matter ever vanished in that cloud
+of sacrifice!</p>
+<p>Mash, the cook, bestowed her honest hand and maiden heart upon
+Patching, the artist, who had first seen her at the station house,
+and there contracted an artistic admiration of her face and figure.
+She would have preferred a pirate; but Patching's enormous hat gave
+him a freebooterish appearance, which went far to reconcile her to
+him. She was really a pretty woman--much handsomer than some of the
+shadowy beauties Patching was wont to put on canvas--and she made
+him a good and faithful wife--and cooked better dinners for him, at
+a small expense, than he had ever eaten before--and sent him out
+into the world clean and tidy every morning. Patching affected to
+be ashamed of his wife, and snubbed her sometimes in the presence
+of other people. But everybody who knew the couple, saw that he had
+the best of the bargain. Mrs. Patching still took her favorite
+weekly, and cried over the stories as copiously as ever.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Crull continued to be the dearest and best friend of Pet
+and Mrs. Overtop; and little Helen and little Fayette would never
+know the great debt of gratitude that they owed to that excellent
+lady. Whenever she called on Mrs. Overtop, she always began to be
+extremely circumspect in her pronunciation and grammar, from force
+of habit; but soon relapsed into those old errors which, happily,
+were of the head, and not of the heart. Mrs. Crull made no mistakes
+in her affections. She was in mourning for Mr. Crull, and truly
+vowed that she would never marry again.</p>
+<p>Mrs. Slapman had ceased to live on the block. Mr. Slapman had
+basely defeated the beneficent decree of the law, by turning his
+property into ready cash, and sailing for Europe. This deprived
+Mrs. S. of her alimony the second year after their separation, and
+compelled her to give up housekeeping, and the pursuit of TRUTH, in
+New York. She is now living among a small colony of Jigbees, in an
+obscure village of Connecticut, the pride of her family, the envy
+of the neighbors, and the idol of two local poets and of the
+professor of a High School in an adjoining town, who has learned
+her history, and is now patiently waiting for Slapman to die before
+offering her his hand in marriage.</p>
+<p>Uncle Ith rang the great bell in the high tower for a number of
+years, with perfect satisfaction to himself and to the firemen. He
+took a paper, and he read it, and he found its political arguments
+so powerful, and so interesting, that he adopted them as his
+own--as many another man of greater pretensions has done--and he
+got into the bad habit of talking politics in a small way. It
+happened, not long after, that there was an election for mayor; and
+a mayor was chosen who held to a variety of politics quite the
+opposite of that which was so ably inculcated in Uncle Ith's
+favorite journal. About a month later, Uncle Ith turned to the
+political column of his paper, and there read that he had been
+turned out of office, and that one Schimmerfliming--a German
+politician of the ----th Ward, who had been of great service in
+compassing the election of the new mayor--had been appointed in his
+place. The fact was, that Uncle Ith was highly acceptable to all
+parties as a no-party man. But, when he turned politician, he made
+himself amenable to the harsh laws of political warfare, and became
+(as his paper phrased it) "the hoary-headed victim of the
+unprincipled tyrant who, with the cunning of the serpent and the
+vindictive ferocity of the hyena, weaves his spider's web of
+mischief in his dark corner of the City Hall." Uncle Ith retired to
+private life with a snug property, patiently saved up and
+thoughtfully invested. But, as Adam went on eating apples,
+notwithstanding the disaster which had come to him from that
+species of fruit, so Uncle Ith took his newspaper, and paid for it
+punctually, and devoured it daily to the last.</p>
+<p>While Uncle Ith fell by politics, Coroner Bullfast rose by it. A
+judicious distribution of money and liquors, a notoriety for street
+fights, a singular talent for profanity, and an unstinted adulation
+of the basest classes of the community, won for him, in succession,
+some of the best prizes of the Municipal lottery. He has his small,
+sunken eyes now fixed on one of the highest offices of the State;
+and it will take a strong combination to defeat a candidate backed
+by such powerful agencies and interests.</p>
+<p>Mr. and Mrs. Frump lived happily on their country property. Mr.
+Frump tried experiments in blackberry raising, which proved a
+success, and was, at last accounts, concentrating his talents on
+the development of a new strawberry seedling. Whenever he went to
+town, he made a point of carrying back Matthew Maltboy, for whom
+his regard was inexplicably strong; and nothing gave him greater
+pleasure than to see his wife, gracefully mounted on the spirited
+filly, and Matthew, heavily astride of the sober gray, starting off
+for a morning's ride, while he stayed at home to push on the
+seedling.</p>
+<p>When Wesley Tiffles had spent ten thousand dollars in elegant
+leisure, he arrived at the noble determination to "salt down," as
+he called it, the remaining ten thousand dollars, in ten different
+savings banks. He distributed it thus, in order that the failure of
+one of the banks might not ruin him. The interest of this money,
+drawn half-yearly, furnished him with a basis for operations of a
+character requiring genius, pens, ink, and paper, rather than ready
+cash. Whenever Tiffles's resources ran short, as they did
+occasionally, he always borrowed, and paid on the next interest
+day. In this policy he was inflexible; and he flattered himself on
+the sternness of his self-denial.</p>
+<p>Among the schemes which failed to receive the cordial
+approbation of capitalists, were the following: "A process for
+extracting green paint from green leaves;" ditto for "making
+nutritious food from the direct combination of earth, air, and
+water;" a plan (submitted to the unappreciating Government of
+Naples) to "extinguish the volcano of Vesuvius, by pumping water
+from the Bay into the crater, in consideration of the sum of one
+million florins, and a monopoly of working the extinct volcano for
+lava."</p>
+<p>Wesley Tiffles, profiting, at a late day, by the lesson of the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener," finally invented and patented a
+striking improvement in an apple-paring machine, and, at last
+accounts, was clenching a good bargain for the sale of his
+invention.</p>
+<br>
+<hr class="full" size="5" noshade>
+<p>***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ROUND THE BLOCK***</p>
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+</html>
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@@ -0,0 +1,17710 @@
+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Round the Block, by John Bell Bouton
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+
+
+
+Title: Round the Block
+
+Author: John Bell Bouton
+
+Release Date: May 3, 2004  [eBook #12243]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: US-ASCII
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ROUND THE BLOCK***
+
+
+E-text prepared by Curtis Weyant, Charlie Kirschner, and the Project
+Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team
+
+
+
+Note: Project Gutenberg also has an HTML version of this
+      file which includes the original illustrations.
+      See 12243-h.htm or 12243-h.zip:
+      (https://www.gutenberg.org/1/2/2/4/12243/12243-h/12243-h.htm)
+      or
+      (https://www.gutenberg.org/1/2/2/4/12243/12243-h.zip)
+
+
+
+
+
+ROUND THE BLOCK
+
+An American Novel
+
+WITH ILLUSTRATIONS
+
+by
+
+JOHN BELL BOUTON
+
+1864
+
+
+
+
+
+
+[Illustration: MRS. SLAPMAN AT HOME--(Book First, Chap. IX.)]
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+
+BOOK FIRST.
+
+NEW YEAR'S DAY.
+
+   I. THE BLOCK.
+  II. THREE BACHELORS.
+ III. PEEPS.
+  IV. QUIGG.
+   V. PLEASURE AS BUSINESS.
+  VI. SOMETHING HIDDEN.
+ VII. THE BOY BOG.
+VIII. MALTBOY'S TWENTIETH AFFAIR.
+  IX. MRS. SLAPMAN AT HOME.
+   X. INFIRMITIES OF GENIUS.
+
+
+BOOK SECOND.
+
+POLISHING.
+
+   I. THE ENIGMA.
+  II. A DELICATE PROPOSITION.
+ III. AN AUXILIARY OF MODERN CIVILIZATION.
+  IV. MISS PILLBODY.
+   V. A FRIEND IN NEED.
+  VI. BRANCHING OUT.
+ VII. THE LITTLE PUPIL.
+
+
+BOOK THIRD.
+
+TRAIL OF THE SERPENT.
+
+   I. "ONE--TWO--THREE--FOUR."
+  II. THE FALLING BOARD.
+ III. SNEAKING JUSTIFIED.
+  IV. UP IN THE AIR.
+   V. TONGUES OF FIRE.
+
+
+BOOK FOURTH.
+
+CHILDREN OF THE WORLD.
+
+   I. MENDERT VAN QUINTEM AND SON.
+  II. BUYING GOOD BEHAVIOR.
+ III. THE YOUNG MONSTER.
+  IV. WESLEY TIFFINS.
+   V. THE PANORAMA OF AFRICA.
+
+
+BOOK FIFTH.
+
+MANOEUVRES.
+
+   I. STOLEN--MORE THAN A PURSE.
+  II. CONSOLATIONS OF HIGH ART.
+ III. LOVING AFAR OFF.
+  IV. LEGERDEMAIN.
+
+
+BOOK SIXTH.
+
+MYSTERIES OF THE NIGHT.
+
+   I. THE UNKNOWN HAND.
+  II. IN VAIN--IN VAIN.
+ III. THE CLASHING ORBS.
+  IV. A VISION OP HORRORS.
+   V. WHAT THE MORNING BROUGHT.
+
+
+BOOK SEVENTH.
+
+JOURNEYINGS AGAINST FATE.
+
+   I. PEA-SHOOTING AS A SCIENCE.
+  II. BY STEAM.
+ III. PIGWORTH, J.P.
+  IV. STOOP.
+   V. AN AUDIENCE ANALYZED.
+  VI. HUMORS OF THE MANY-HEADED.
+ VII. SCENES NOT IN THE BILLS.
+
+
+BOOK EIGHTH.
+
+A DRAMATIC INTERLUDE.
+
+   I. THE OVERTURE.
+  II. CURTAIN UP.
+ III. ACT SECOND.
+  IV. HOW THE PLAY ENDED.
+
+
+BOOK NINTH.
+
+THE INQUEST.
+
+   I. CORONER AND JURY.
+  II. STATEMENT OF THE PRISONER.
+ III. JUSTICE GOES TO DINNER.
+  IV. LIGHT IN THE PRISON.
+   V. THE SORROW OF WHITE HAIRS.
+  VI. WHAT PAPER, TYPES, AND INK CAN DO.
+ VII. PET AS A WITNESS.
+VIII. THE BENEFICENCE OF FIRE BELLS.
+  IX. AN OLD MAN'S OFFERING.
+
+
+BOOK TENTH.
+
+DONE ON BOTH SIDES.
+
+   I. A FISHER OF MEN.
+  II. PLAYING WITH THE LINE.
+ III. PULLING IN.
+  IV. THE FIRST OF MAY.
+   V. DEMOLITION OF CERTAIN AIR CASTLES.
+  VI. MR. WHEDELL'S CREDITORS IN CONVENTION ASSEMBLED.
+ VII. DEUS EX MACHINA.
+
+
+BOOK ELEVENTH.
+
+DISCOVERIES.
+
+   I. THE OLD HOUSE REVISITED.
+  II. A POSTHUMOUS SECRET.
+ III. OVERTOP FINDS A SENSIBLE WOMAN.
+  IV. INNOCENCE ON A SLIPPERY ROAD.
+   V. BOG'S OPEN SESAME.
+  VI. TRACKED.
+ VII. FOUND AND LOST.
+
+
+BOOK TWELFTH.
+
+SPECULATIONS--PECUNIARY AND MATRIMONIAL.
+
+   I. THE "COSMOPOLITAN WINDOW FASTENER."
+  II. MIDDLE-AGED CUPID.
+ III. SLAPMAN _vs_. SLAPMAN.
+  IV. HOW OVERTOP SEALED A CONTRACT IN A WAY UNKNOWN TO CHITTY.
+   V. A RETURNED CALIFORNIAN.
+  VI. REVELATIONS OF A LAUGH.
+
+
+BOOK THIRTEENTH.
+
+THE STRANGE LADY.
+
+   I. A STORY OP THE PAST.
+  II. POSSIBLE LOVE.
+ III. UNCLE AND NIECE.
+
+
+BOOK FOURTEENTH.
+
+HAPPY DAYS.
+
+   I. OWNERS OF THE BEAUTIFUL.
+  II. THE LAST OF A MYSTERY.
+ III. LOVE CROWNED.
+  IV. FIVE YEARS.
+
+
+
+
+BOOK FIRST.
+
+NEW YEAR'S DAY
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE BLOCK.
+
+On the east side of the block were four brownstone houses, wide, tall,
+and roomy. Seen from the street, they had the appearance of not being
+inhabited. In the upper stories, all the curtains or blinds were closely
+drawn. In the lower story, the heavy lace that hung in carefully
+careless folds on each side of the window, seemed never to have been
+disturbed since it left the upholsterer's hands. Whatever life and
+motion there might have been in the basement, were sheltered from
+observation by conical firs or square-clipped box borders, set out on
+strictly geometrical principles in each of the four front yards. The
+doors were ponderous and tight fitting, as if they were never meant to
+be opened; and the vivid polish of their surfaces showed no trace of
+human handling. No marks of feet could be detected on the smooth, heavy
+flagstones which led up from the sidewalk, or on the great steps flanked
+by massive balustrades. The four mansions, in their new, lofty, and
+apparently tenantless state, looked, like the occasional residences of
+people for some purpose of ceremony, rather than the dear homes of the
+small, loving, domestic circles that really lived there.
+
+Such was the outer view of the east side of the block, and it is the
+only view that the reader of this book will get; for it is the author's
+intention profoundly to respect the select seclusion of the occupants.
+
+Now, the west side of the block was in all respects, exactly opposite to
+the east side. The houses were built of bricks, dingy with the whirling
+dust of twenty years. Two of the three stories swarmed with women and
+children, always visible at all seasons; and the lower story was devoted
+to some kind of cheap trade. Wholesale business is gregarious in its
+ways; but it is the habit of retail business to scatter, so as to
+present, in the same neighborhood, no two people in exactly the same
+line. Thus it happened that, on the west side of the block, there was
+only one drygoods dealer, whose shop front and awning posts were
+festooned with calicoes and other fabrics, ticketed with ingeniously
+deformed figures, and bearing some attractive adjective, expressing the
+owners private and conscientious opinion of their excellence. There was
+one boot-maker, who strung up his products in long branches, like
+onions; and, although his business was not at all flourishing, solaced
+himself with the reflection that he had a monopoly of it on the block.
+There was one apothecary, between whose flashing red and yellow lights
+and those of his nearest rival there was a desirable distance. A
+solitary coffinmaker, a butcher, a baker, a newspaper vender, a barber,
+a confectioner, a hardware merchant, a hatter, and a tailor, each
+encroaching rather extensively on the sidewalk with the emblems of his
+trade, rejoiced in their exemption from a ruinous competition. The only
+people on the block whose interests appeared to clash, were the grocers,
+who flanked either corner, and made a large and delusive show of boxes,
+barrels, and tea chests; and it was strongly suspected that they were
+identical in interests, under different names, and maintained a secret
+league to catch all the custom of the vicinity.
+
+The south side was a gradation of buildings, from the two-story brick
+grocery on the west corner to the grandest of the stone mansions on the
+east. With the exception of two or three houses built in the early
+history of the block, and occupied by obstinate old proprietors, it
+presented such a regularly ascending line of roofs, that a giant could
+have walked up stairs from one end to the other. Although each house was
+built upon a plan peculiar to itself, and supposed to reflect the
+long-cherished views of the original owner, there were certain
+resemblances among them. This was sometimes the effect of a jealous
+rivalry; sometimes of imitation. In one dozen houses there was a costly
+struggle for supremacy in window curtains. In another dozen, the
+harmless contest pertained to Grecian urns crowned with flowers, or dry
+dolphins, tritons, or naiads, rising from the bosoms of little gravel
+beds in miniature front yards. In a third dozen, there was a perspective
+of broad iron balconies elegantly constructed for show, and sometimes
+put to hazardous use, on warm summer nights, by venturesome gentlemen
+with cigars, or ladies with fans.
+
+About the middle of the block was a colony of doctors, who had
+increased, in five years, from two to ten. Their march was eastward, and
+it could be calculated to a nicety how long it would be before the small
+black, gilt-lettered signs of their profession would press hard upon the
+great house at the corner. Why they thus congregated together, unless
+with the friendly purpose of relieving each other's patients in each
+other's absence, and so saving humanity from sudden suffering and death,
+was a mystery to everybody but themselves.
+
+The north side lacked variety. One part of it, comprising twenty lots,
+had been built up on speculation by an enterprising landowner. The
+houses were precisely alike, from coal cellar to chimney top, with front
+railings of exactly the same pattern, crowned with iron pineapples from
+the same mould, encompassing little plots of ground laid out in walks
+similar to the fraction of a hair; the sole ornaments of which were four
+little spruce trees, planted at equal distances apart.
+
+This row of houses was very distracting even to the occupants, with whom
+it was a feat of arithmetic to identify their homes in the daytime, and
+much more so at night, when the landmarks were shadowy and
+indistinguishable. Occasionally, well-meaning tenants found themselves
+pulling at wrong doorbells; and there was one man who got tipsy every
+Saturday night, and rang himself quite through the row before he tumbled
+in on his own hall carpet. It was in counting the spruce trees, he said,
+which had a perplexing way of doubling, that he invariably lost
+the track.
+
+In nearly every house on this block there was a piano. The piano was the
+great equalizer of the block. And, though in the loftier houses the
+pianos might have been larger and costlier, and unquestionably noisier,
+it did not follow that they were better played or pleasanter to hear
+than the humbler instruments which served to swell the tumultuous chorus
+in hours of morning practice. With regard to these pianos, it may here
+be observed, that a gentleman with a passion for statistics, who chanced
+to be well acquainted through the block, made the remarkable discovery
+that the players were usually unmarried ladies; and that, when they
+acquired husbands (as they occasionally did on that block), they put
+aside the piano as something quite incapable of contributing to their
+new-found happiness.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+THREE BACHELOKS.
+
+Near the centre of the north side of the block stood a house in which
+three men, who have much to do in this story, were whiling away an hour
+before dinner, at the edge of evening, in the month of December, 185-.
+The house had strange stones let in over the windows and door, and was
+broad and sturdy, and was entered by steps slightly worn, and was shaded
+by a tall and old chestnut tree, and showed many signs of age. It was
+because of these evidences of antiquity, although the house was in good
+preservation and vastly comfortable, that it had been picked out and
+rented by the three men, two weeks previously.
+
+Yet the three men exhibited no marks of age, past or coming, upon them.
+The oldest, Mr. Marcus Wilkeson, looked no more than thirty-two; but
+frankly owned to thirty-six. Being six feet and two inches high, having
+a slim figure, round face, smooth brow, gentle eyes, perfect teeth to
+the utmost extent of his laugh, and a head of hair free from the
+plague-spot of incipient baldness which haunts the young men of this
+generation, his appearance, now that he was confessedly a man, was very
+much like that of an overgrown boy. On the contrary, when he was really
+a boy, his extraordinary height (six feet at sixteen years) had given
+him the outward semblance of a premature man. Probably his long legs and
+arms, which were exceedingly supple, and were always swinging about with
+a certain juvenile awkwardness, contributed much to the youthfulness of
+his appearance.
+
+At the time of his introduction here, his legs were as quiet as in their
+nature they could be, having been elevated, for the greater comfort of
+the owner, to the top of a pianoforte, and presenting an inclination of
+forty-five degrees to Mr. Wilkeson's body, reposing calmly and smoking
+an antique pipe in his favorite chair below. One of his long arms was
+hanging listlessly by his side, and the other made a sharp projecting
+elbow, and terminated in the interior of his vest. This was the attitude
+which, of all possible adjustments of the human anatomy, Mr. Wilkeson
+preferred; and he always assumed it and his pipe the moment he had put
+on his dressing gown and Turkey slippers. He was well aware that popular
+treatises on the "Art of Behavior" and the "Code of Politeness" were
+extremely hard upon this disposition of the legs. His half-sister,
+Philomela Wilkeson, who was high authority, had often visited his legs
+with the severest censure, when, upon suddenly entering the room where
+he was seated, she found the offending members confronting her from the
+top of the piano, or the table, or a chair, or sometimes from the
+mantelpiece. While Marcus Wilkeson admitted the full force of her
+strictures as applied to legs in general, he claimed an exception for
+his legs, which were always in his own or other people's way when they
+rested on the floor, or were crossed after the many fashions popular
+with the short-legged part of mankind.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson's heretical opinion concerning legs was part of a system
+of independent views which he entertained of life generally. He had
+given up a profitable broker's shop in Wall street, a year before,
+because he had made a fortune ten times larger than he would ever spend.
+Having fulfilled the object for which he started in business, and for
+which he had toiled like a slave ten years, he conceived that nothing
+could be more sensible than to retire from it, make room for other
+deserving men, and enjoy his ample earnings in the ways which pleased
+him most, before an old age of money getting had deadened his five
+senses, his intellect, and his heart.
+
+Persons who knew Marcus Wilkeson well were aware that he was a shy,
+self-distrustful fellow, amiable, generous, and that the only faults
+which could possibly be alleged against him were an excessive fondness
+for old books, old cigars, and profitless meditations, and a catlike
+affection for quiet corners. And when his half-sister Philomela--who had
+no hypocritical concealment about her, thank heaven! and always told
+people what she thought of them--pronounced the first of those luxuries
+"trash," the second "disgusting," and the other two "idiotic," he met
+her candid criticisms with a pleasant laugh, and said that, at any rate,
+they hurt nobody but himself.
+
+To which Philomela invariably retorted: "But suppose every strapping
+fellow, at your time of life, should take to novel-reading, and such
+fooleries, what would become of the world, I would like to know?"
+
+And her brother, puffing out a long stream of smoke, would respond:
+"Suppose, my dear sister, every woman was destined to be an old maid, as
+you are, what would become of the world, _I_ would like to know?"
+
+The conversation always terminated at this point, by Philomela declaring
+that coarse personality was the refuge of weak-minded people when they
+could not answer arguments, and that, for her part, she would never take
+the trouble to say another plain, straightforward word for his good;
+whereupon there would be a truce, lasting sometimes a whole day.
+
+Fayette Overtop, the second of the three young men--the one looking out
+of the window, drumming idly on the glass, and continually tossing back
+his head to clear the long black hair from his brow, over which it hung
+in an incurable cowlick--was a short, compact, nervous person,
+twenty-five years old. Mr. Overtop had been educated for the law, but,
+finding the profession uncomfortably crowded when he came into it, had
+not yet achieved those brilliant triumphs which he once fondly imagined
+within his reach. For three years he had been in regular attendance at
+his office from nine A.M. to three P.M. (as per written card on the
+door), except in term time, when he was a patient frequenter of the
+courts. During these three years he had picked up something less than
+enough to pay his half of the rent of two small, dimly lighted, but
+expensive rooms on the fourth floor of a labyrinth in the lower part
+of the city.
+
+Mr. Overtop, when asked to explain this state of things, about which he
+made no concealment, always attributed it to a "lack of clients."
+
+If he had clients enough, and of the right kind, he felt confident that
+he could make a figure in the profession. Having few clients, and those
+in insignificant cases only, of course he had no opportunities for
+distinction. He could not stand in the street and beg for clients, or
+drag men forcibly into his chambers and compel them to be clients; and
+he would not degrade the dignity of his calling by advertising for
+clients, or taking any means whatever to get them, except by
+establishing a reputation for professional learning and integrity. The
+only inducement which he ever put in the way of clients, was a series of
+signs, outside the street door, on the first flight of stairs, at the
+head of the first landing, on the second flight of stairs, at the head
+of the second landing, and so on to the fourth floor, where the firm
+name of "Overtop & Maltboy" confronted the panting climber for the
+eighth and last time, painted in large gold letters on black tin, nailed
+to the office door.
+
+Mr. Overtop was willing to give clients every facility for finding him,
+when they had once started at the bottom of the building; and would, as
+it were, lead them gently on, by successive signs; but good luck and a
+good name, slowly but surely acquired, must do the rest.
+
+A snug property, of which Mr. Overtop spent less than the income,
+fortunately enabled him to indulge in these novel views, and to regard
+clients, much as they were desired, as by no means indispensable to his
+existence. In his unprofessional hours, Mr. Overtop was everything but a
+lawyer. He was chiefly a philosopher, a discoverer, a searcher after
+truth, a turner-up of undeveloped beauties in every-day things, which,
+he said, were rich in instruction when intelligently examined. He could
+trace out lines of beauty in a gridiron, and detect the subtle charm
+that lurks in the bootjack.
+
+As not unfrequently happens, in partnerships of business and of other
+descriptions, Matthew Maltboy--the young man standing before the blazing
+coal fire, and critically surveying his own person--was quite the
+opposite of Fayette Overtop. Maltboy was fat and calm. Portraits were in
+existence showing Maltboy as a young lad in a jacket and turn-down
+collar, having a slim, graceful figure, a delicate face, and a sad but
+interesting promise of early decay upon him. Other portraits, of the
+same original, taken at later periods of the photographic art,
+represented a gradual squaring out of the shoulders, a progressive
+puffiness in the cheeks, lips, and hands, incipient folds in the chin,
+and a prevalent swollen appearance over all of Matthew Maltboy that the
+artist permitted the sun to copy.
+
+Portraits of Maltboy for a series of years would have proved a valuable
+contribution to human knowledge, as showing the steady and remarkable
+changes through which a man who is doomed to be fat passes onward to his
+destiny. But Maltboy stopped sitting for portraits when he reached the
+age of twenty, deciding, as many another public character has done, to
+transmit only the earlier and more ethereal representations of himself
+to posterity.
+
+By some compensating law of Nature, there were given to Maltboy a light
+and cheerful heart, a tendency to laugh on the smallest provocation, and
+a nice susceptibility to the beautiful. Not the beautiful in rivers,
+forests, skies, and other inanimate things, but the beautiful in woman.
+And as Overtop was gifted to discover charms in material objects which
+were plain in other eyes, so Maltboy possessed the wonderful faculty of
+seeing beauty in female faces, where other people saw, perhaps, only a
+bad nose, dull eyes, and a pinched-up mouth. This mental endowment might
+have been a priceless gift to a portrait painter, who was desirous of
+gratifying his sitters; but it was for Matthew Maltboy a fatal
+possession. It had led him to love too many women too much at first
+sight, and to shift his admiration from one dear object to another with
+a suddenness and rapidity destructive to a well-ordered state
+of society.
+
+Though these multiplied transfers of affection occasionally caused some
+disappointment among the victims of Mr. Maltboy's inconstancy, it was
+wisely ordained that he should be the principal sufferer--that every new
+passion should involve him in new difficulties, and subject him to a
+degree of mental distress which would have reduced the flesh of any man
+not hopelessly predisposed to fatness. As Mr. Matthew Maltboy stood by
+the fire, he was not taking the profitable retrospective view of his
+life which he should have taken, but was glancing with an expression of
+concern at the circumference of a showy vest pattern which cut off the
+view of his legs.
+
+The apartment in which the three bachelors were keeping a meditative
+silence, was large, square, high, on the first floor back, commanding an
+ample prospect of neglected rear yards, and all the strange things that
+are usually huddled into those strictly private domains. The furniture
+of the room was rich and substantial, but not too good to be used. The
+chairs were none of those frail, slippery structures of horsehair and
+mahogany so inhospitably cold to the touch; but they were oak, high
+backed, deep, long armed, softly but stoutly cushioned with leather, and
+yawned to receive nodding tenants and send them comfortably to sleep
+amid the fragrant clouds of the after-dinner pipe or cigar.
+
+At one end of the room was Marcus Wilkeson's library, consisting of
+about five hundred volumes, of poems, novels, travels by land and sea,
+histories, and biographies, which the owner dogmatically held to be all
+the books in the world worth reading. The admission of a new book to
+this select company of standard worthies, Mr. Wilkeson was vain enough
+to regard as a high compliment to the author, and as a final settlement
+of any disputes which might have been abroad as to its merits.
+
+On another side of the room was a grand piano, open, and covered with
+the latest music, and sometimes played on in a surprisingly graceful
+manner by the fat fingers of Matthew Maltboy. On the walls hung some
+pictures, that were not unpleasant to look at. There were two portraits
+of danseuses, with little gauzy wings, and wands tipped with magic
+stars; one large, full-faced likeness of a pet actress, taken in just
+the right attitude to show the rounding shoulders, the lightly poised
+head, and the heavy hair, to the best advantage; some charming French
+prints, among them "Niobe and her Daughters" and "Di Vernon;" and a half
+dozen pictures of the fine old English stage-coach days. Over the
+fireplace were suspended several pairs of boxing gloves, garnishing the
+picture of a tall fellow in fighting attitude, whose prodigious muscles
+were only a little smaller than those of all the saints and angels of
+all the accredited masterpieces of ancient art. A pair of foils and
+masks, neatly arranged over each corner of the mantelpiece, completed
+the decorations of the room.
+
+The three bachelors had gone into housekeeping by way of experiment, as
+a relief from the tedium and oppression of hotels and boarding houses,
+and as an escape from female society, which was beginning to pall even
+upon the huge appetite of Matthew Maltboy.
+
+But two weeks of this self-imposed exile--with no female society but
+Miss Philomela Wilkeson, and Mash, the cook--proved rather too much for
+Matthew's fortitude. He yawned audibly.
+
+"I understand you," said Marcus; "you are sick of this."
+
+"Well--hum--it's a little prosy at times." Maltboy yawned again.
+
+"Incorrigible monster!" cried Marcus. "What shall we do with him, Top?"
+
+The person addressed swung back the rebellious cowlick from his
+forehead, as if to clear his thinking faculties from a load while he
+considered the grave question. "Do with him? Do with him? Oh! I'll tell
+you." Here the speaker's eyes flashed with the light of a great
+discovery. "Tether him like a horse, with a certain limited area to feed
+in. D'ye see? D'ye see?"
+
+"A horse? Can't say that I do," returned Mr. Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"And I can't say that _I_ do, either," added Mr. Matthew Maltboy. "A
+horse! Why not say a donkey? I should see it quite as well."
+
+"As you please," resumed the impetuous Overtop. "A donkey, then. Perhaps
+the metaphor will be better. What I mean--what you two are so dull as
+not to see--is to put this unreliable Maltboy on a moderate allowance of
+flirtation; to keep him, for example, within the limits of this block.
+D'ye see? D'ye catch the idea?"
+
+"It begins to dawn on me," said Wilkeson.
+
+"And I catch a ray or two of it," added Maltboy. But--"
+
+"Excuse me," interrupted Overtop, stepping between his two companions,
+and gesticulating wildly at each of them in turn, as if he would dart
+conviction into them like electricity from the tips of his fingers.
+"Here is a block full of people. Their houses are joined together, or
+nearly so, all the way round. The inhabitants hear each other's pianos
+playing and each other's babies squalling all day long. If a fire breaks
+out in the block, it may be all burned down together. If the measles
+makes its appearance on the block, it probably runs through it. Is there
+not, therefore, a community of dangers among us; and if of dangers, why
+not of pleasures? Why should not the inhabitants of a block be regarded
+as a distinct settlement, or tribe, whose members owe kindness and
+goodwill to each other before the rest of the world? Looking at it in
+the light of humanity, is it not our duty to know our neighbors?"
+
+"And Matt would say, To love them too--that is, the young and pretty
+ones," observed "Wilkeson.
+
+"Precisely," said Maltboy.
+
+"Excuse me," continued Overtop, deprecating further interruption with
+both hands. "That is the point I was just coming to. Since Maltboy
+_must_ have female society, and cannot be kept out of it by main force,
+why not give him the range of this block? Catch the idea, eh?--in its
+full force and bearings?"
+
+"Wilkeson and Maltboy implied, by nods, that they caught it.
+
+"And--ahem--I think I'll take the same range too," added Overtop. "Not
+because I care a pin about female society, but just to test my
+new theory."
+
+Cries of "Oh! oh!" from Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+Overtop laughed. "You'll be a convert to it yet, my good fellow."
+
+"Never," said Marcus, inflexibly, "so long as books and tobacco hold
+out."
+
+"We'll see," replied Overtop. "But let me think how we are to begin." He
+rubbed his nose with a forefinger, then tossed back the cowlick, and
+said, impetuously: "I have it--I have it! We know Quigg, the grocer, at
+the corner below, for we are customers of his. Of course, he has an
+immense number of customers on the block, and will make New Year's
+calls on all of them, in the way of business. Why can't he take us in
+tow? It's as plain as daylight."
+
+"Plain enough, I admit," said Marcus Wilkeson; "but what will Quigg's
+customers say?"
+
+"Poor fellow!" returned Overtop. "How feebly you hermits reason about
+society! If you had knocked round town on New Year's days, as Matt and I
+have often done, you would know that visitors are valued only because
+they swell the number of calls, and that it is entirely immaterial who
+they are, or who introduces them. The militia general, the banker, the
+judge, the D.D., the butcher, the drygoods clerk, are units of equal
+value on that day, each adding one more to the score which is privately
+kept behind the door. We shall be welcome; never fear for that. You must
+come with us, and see for yourself."
+
+"I thank you," said Marcus Wilkeson, laughing. "No such fooleries at my
+time of life."
+
+"Very well," said Overtop. "Matt and I will try to represent the new
+firm of bachelor housekeepers creditably. Matt will look after the
+pretty girls, and I after the sensible ones--that is, if there happen to
+be any on this block."
+
+"Agreed," observed Matthew Maltboy, catching a view of himself in a
+glass over the fireplace, and not wholly displeased with his appearance.
+
+"Another thought strikes me," said Overtop, explosively. "It's nearly
+half an hour to sunset. I am impatient to begin my acquaintance with our
+fellow citizens--our future friends, if I may so call them. Let us look
+out of the windows, and see what the excellent people are doing. Perhaps
+it may interest even a recluse and bookworm like you."
+
+"Nonsense," rejoined Marcus Wilkeson. "There's no curiosity in my
+composition."
+
+And yet, when his two companions stood at the window of the little back
+parlor, pressing their noses against the glass, and looking out, he
+could not resist the temptation to join them, although he thought
+proper to punch them in the ribs, and call them a pair of inquisitive
+puppies, by way of showing how much he was superior to the great human
+infirmity.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+PEEPS.
+
+The uniform row of houses on the other side of a dead waste of snow, to
+which the attention of the three friends was ardently directed,
+promised, at first sight, a poor return of instruction and
+entertainment. The rear view presented one dull stretch of bricks
+irregularly set even in those houses which displayed imposing fronts of
+brown stone. The blinds were of a faded green color, and broken. The
+stoops, the doors opening on them, and the steps leading down to the
+dirty, sodden snow, had a generic look of cheapness and frailty.
+"Whatever the censorious critic might say of the front, he could not
+charge the rear with false pretences; for there was apparent, all over
+it, an utter indifference to the opinions of mankind. Perhaps because
+the owners of the houses did not expect mankind to study their property
+from that point of view.
+
+"Say!" was Mr. Fayette Overtop's first remark, after a moment's
+observation; "do not those rustic fences on the roofs remind you of the
+sweet, fresh country in summer time?" Mr. Overtop alluded to the
+barriers which are erected to keep people from getting into each other's
+houses, and which are scaled not without difficulty even by cats.
+
+Neither of his friends answering this remark except by a quiet,
+incredulous smile, Overtop continued, a little pettishly:
+
+"And you really mean to tell me that that pastoral object, happily
+introduced on the roofs of houses, does not recall the green fields,
+daisies, babbling brooks, and cloudless skies of early boyhood? Humbug!"
+The speaker flattened his nose still more against the glass by way
+of emphasis.
+
+"You look for beauties among the chimney pots, while I search for them
+in back-parlor windows," said Matthew Maltboy. "Observe where I throw
+my eye now."
+
+Mr. Maltboy threw his eye toward a house near the middle of the block.
+His companions followed it, and saw a tall girl with prodigious skirts
+standing at a window, and looking, as they thought, at them. The view
+which she obtained was evidently not satisfactory, for with her
+handkerchief she wiped off the moisture from several of the panes; and,
+when the glass was clear to her liking, shook out the folds of her
+dress, and peered forth again, this time more decidedly, at the window
+occupied by the three friends. Her use of the handkerchief was not lost
+upon Maltboy, who straightway pulled out his extensive cambric, and
+polished up their window too. This improvement of the medium of vision
+on both sides, enabled the three friends to form some idea of the tall
+girl's personal charms. Her figure was straight; her hair was black; her
+eyes were brilliant; her complexion was healthy; she exhibited jewelry
+in her ears, on her neck, her bosom, her wrists, and her fingers; her
+dress gave her a great deal of trouble, as she leaned forward to
+look out.
+
+"Charming, is she not?" said Maltboy.
+
+"Hard to say, at this distance," returned Overtop, who, feeling
+neglected in the matter of the rustic fence, was controversially
+disposed.
+
+"You may find it so," said Maltboy; "but as for me, the flash of her
+eyes--there, now, for instance!--is convincing enough."
+
+"Perhaps you have seen her before," remarked Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"Perhaps," was that gentleman's answer, implying, by his accent and
+accompanying wink, that he had seen her repeatedly.
+
+"And said nothing about her to us, you inveterate humbug," added Marcus.
+
+Mr. Maltboy felt the compliment conveyed in the word "humbug"--as most
+people do when that accusation of shrewdness and deep dissembling is
+brought against them--and smiled.
+
+"I confess," he replied, as he polished the window simultaneously with
+the performance of that process across the way, "I confess I have
+noticed her several times; but what was the use of mentioning it to a
+pair of woman haters like you?"
+
+His two companions laughed pleasantly, thereby expressing their
+gratification at the return compliment involved in the phrase
+"woman haters."
+
+"You are such dull fellows now," continued Maltboy, "that perhaps you
+will say this fair stranger is not looking at us; that she does not
+desire to be seen by us--that is, by me; and that her rubbing of the
+window with a handkerchief is not a signal which she expects to be
+answered."
+
+"We say nothing," replied the disputatious Overtop. "We only wait for
+proof. It is easy to find out whether a signal is meant or not. Rub the
+window now."
+
+Maltboy did so, concluding the act with an unmistakable flourish of the
+handkerchief. Whereupon the tall girl averted her face, pulled down the
+curtain, and eclipsed herself.
+
+Wilkeson and Overtop laughed, and, with a common impulse, punched
+Maltboy triumphantly in the ribs--a friendly salute that was always
+vastly amusing to that gentleman.
+
+"Be it understood, at this stage of affairs," said Marcus, solemnly,
+"that I reject the Overtop theory, and wash my hands of all
+responsibility for Maltboy's misdeeds.--Hallo! There he is again."
+
+"Who? Where?" exclaimed his two friends.
+
+"In the house nearly opposite--the one with the grape arbor. Isn't he a
+fine old fellow?"
+
+Overtop and Maltboy looked, and there saw, sitting at a window, and
+placidly gazing out of it, an old gentleman with long and thick white
+hair, a ruddy face, a white neckcloth, and a large projecting shirt
+frill--which were all the peculiarities of person and dress that could
+be distinctly made out. He was smoking a long pipe, and placidly rocking
+himself to and fro. His appearance, through the two windows, was that
+of a finely preserved relic of a past generation,
+
+"He always has a long pipe in his mouth, and looks benignantly into the
+open air," said Wilkeson,
+
+"So even _you_ are not wholly devoid of curiosity, and do take some
+interest in the people on our block," remarked Matthew Maltboy,
+
+"I have noticed the old gentleman often, when I have been reading near
+the window; and own that I should like to know him. I think, too, from
+certain signs, that he would not object to knowing me. Unless I am much
+mistaken, he has bowed to me several times. But fearing that the
+supposed bow might have been nothing more than a sleepy nod, I have
+never ventured to answer it. Step back a moment, and see if he
+observes me."
+
+Maltboy and Overtop retired a few paces. A moment afterward, the old
+gentleman looked over to Wilkeson, and made a bow at him about which
+there could be no mistake.
+
+"Answer him." "Answer him," said his two friends. Acting upon this
+advice, Marcus Wilkeson, blushing, returned a courtly salute, which was
+immediately reciprocated by a still lower bow, and a pleasant smile from
+the old gentleman. Wilkeson bowed again, and added a smile. The old
+gentleman did the same; and this odd exchange of civilities was
+beginning to get awkward for Wilkeson, when the old gentleman's
+attention was suddenly called off.
+
+A slender young man, whose broad black mustache contrasted unpleasantly
+with the sallow whiteness of his face, dressed in the jauntiest costume
+of the period, and bearing in one hand a black cane with a large ivory
+handle, which looked, even in the distance, like a human leg, stood by
+the old gentleman's side. The old gentleman put down his pipe, seized
+the young man's disengaged hand, and gazed affectionately at him (so the
+three observers thought). Some conversation then took place between
+them, during which the old gentleman repeatedly pressed the young man's
+hand, and sometimes reached up and softly patted him on the shoulder.
+The young man appeared to receive the words and caresses of the old
+gentleman with a sullen indifference. Several times he pettishly drew
+his hand away, and at last shook his head fiercely, folded his arms, and
+seemed (though the spectators could only conjecture that) to stamp the
+floor with his foot. At this, the old gentleman bowed his head in his
+hands. The young man held his defiant attitude unmoved, until, glancing
+out of the window, he saw for the first time that he was watched. "With
+a jerk, he pulled down the curtain, and cut off a scene which the three
+observers had begun to find profoundly interesting.
+
+"Well," said Marcus Wilkeson, "though I have given up making calls as a
+business, I shall certainly take the New-Year's privilege of dropping in
+on the venerable unknown over the way."
+
+"Two things are plain," said Fayette Overtop. "One is, that the pale,
+rascally looking young man is the old man's son. Now, I don't suppose
+either of you will dispute that?" (Overtop paused a moment to receive
+and dispose of objections, but none were made.) "The other is, that the
+old fellow is immensely rich--worth a million or two, maybe. Perhaps you
+_would_ like to argue that point." Overtop smiled, as if nothing would
+give him greater pleasure than to annihilate a few dozen opinions to
+the contrary.
+
+"To save argument, as usual, we admit everything," responded Wilkeson.
+"But, pray condescend to tell us how you know this fine old boy to be
+superlatively rich."
+
+Overtop smiled upon his ignorant friends, and answered:
+
+"Because he wears a white cravat. The man isn't a clergyman, is he? Do
+clergymen smoke pipes? He isn't a Quaker, is he? Do Quakers, or those of
+them who indulge in white cravats, wear their coat collars turned down?
+Consult your own experience, now, and tell me whether you ever saw
+anybody but a very rich man (with the exceptions already stated) wearing
+a white cravat. I leave it to your candor."
+
+Wilkeson and Maltboy nodded their heads, as if stricken dumb with
+conviction.
+
+Overtop, gratified with this ready acquiescence, modestly went on to say
+that he would not undertake to explain the phenomenon; that task he left
+to some more philosophical mind. He contented himself with making a
+humble record of facts.
+
+"And now that each of you have made a discovery in the row of houses,
+let me try my luck." Overtop rubbed the window, looked out, and
+carefully surveyed the row from end to end, and back again. "Ah, I have
+it!" he said. "A real mystery, too. Look at that four-story house near
+the western end of the block, the one a trifle shabbier than its
+neighbors. Do you see, in the open window, a man with a pale,
+intellectual face, gray hair, and arms bare to the elbows, filing away
+at something held in a vise before him? Now he stops to examine a
+paper--a plan, probably--which he holds in his hand. Now he wipes the
+perspiration from his forehead. Can't you see him?"
+
+"Distinctly," was the joint reply.
+
+"What do you suppose he is doing?" asked Overtop.
+
+"No idea," said Wilkeson. "Perhaps mending a teakettle."
+
+"Or repairing an umbrella," suggested Maltboy.
+
+Overtop smiled, and said:
+
+"A person with the slightest powers of observation, would see that that
+man has genius in his face; that his thin arm is not used to hard
+mechanical labor; that his brain is so heated with great ideas, that he
+tries to cool it by opening the window. The tinkering of an umbrella or
+teakettle would not make a man sweat in midwinter. You won't deny the
+force of that suggestion."
+
+As he spoke, a young girl advanced from the back part of the room, and
+stood by the pale workman's side. She wore a bonnet, and a shawl
+tightly wrapped around her. Though the features of her face could not be
+distinguished in the distance, it was not hard to detect a pleasant
+expression in her eyes, a smile on her lips, and a high color on her
+cheeks, as if she had just come in from the street. She held up a little
+basket for the workman's inspection.
+
+He paused in his labor, took the girl's head between his hands, and
+kissed her fondly on the brow. Then he opened the little basket, and
+drew from it a loaf of bread and a piece of cheese, which he began
+eating hurriedly. He also seemed, by signs, to press the girl to eat;
+but she shook her head, smiled more than before, and looked up
+affectionately into his face. Having bolted a few mouthfuls, the workman
+placed the remains of the repast on the bench or table before him,
+kissed the young girl, and resumed his work. She watched every motion of
+his hand with eager eyes. Once she moved as if to close the window, but
+he shook his head, and again wiped the sweat from his brow.
+
+He had consulted the paper, and attacked his task with fresh energy for
+the third or fourth time, when his eyes happened to rest upon the window
+full of scrutinizing faces. His lips moved in some sudden exclamation,
+and then he shut the window with vehemence, and drew the curtain which
+obscured the lower half of it.
+
+"Not a very kind reception of your theory, so far," said Marcus.
+
+"Prejudice--nothing more," said Overtop. "When they see that we have no
+wish to pry into their private affairs, but are animated with a
+neighborly regard for them, they will not repel our advances. It isn't
+human nature."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+QIGG.
+
+During the following two weeks, up to New Year's day, the three friends
+made little progress in their observations. The tall girl in the immense
+skirts appeared rarely to reward Matthew Maltboy's ardent gaze, and even
+then seemed to look down at the dingy snow beneath, or the clouds
+overhead, or to something or somebody across the way, but never to the
+fluttering Maltboy.
+
+Nothing more was seen of the pale and grayhaired workman; for he kept
+the lower curtain of his window jealously drawn. But at night his
+shadow, strongly projected on the curtain, was in incessant motion; and
+far into the morning hours a gigantic head and arms shifted and blended
+upon it in grotesque forms. At the other window of the workman's
+apartment the young girl often sat, book in hand, and moved her lips as
+if she were reading aloud. Her eyes were never seen to wander to the
+outer world with those longings for freedom and fresh air which are
+natural to the youthful heart, but were always fixed upon the book, or
+upon some object within the room. She was entirely unconscious of the
+distant and imperfect scrutiny to which her form and movements were
+subjected by Marcus Wilkeson, who had begun to take a strange interest
+in her, and in the shadow on the curtain, since the healthy and amiable
+old gentleman directly opposite had ceased to smoke his pipe and indulge
+in his tranquil meditation daily.
+
+Twice only had he shown himself, and then, after a grave bow to Marcus
+Wilkeson, who returned it with more than the usual inclination of head,
+the old gentleman had taken a few whiffs at his pipe, looked out of the
+window with a troubled air, and vanished from the sight of his
+sympathizing observer, as if the quiet old sitting place had lost its
+charm for him. The young man--the disturbing element of the old
+gentleman's life, as Marcus Wilkeson regarded him--was not again seen
+in the room where he had made his first appearance, but was discovered,
+several days after that event, sitting at a table near a window in the
+second story, and writing industriously. His labors were evidently not
+disagreeable; for, after an hour's engagement with his pen, he would sit
+back in his chair, laugh, take a long drink from a black bottle which
+stood at his elbow, and light a fresh cigar. Whatever his occupation, he
+was completely absorbed in it, and did not notice the pair of keen eyes
+peering at him from behind a book in the house opposite. Every
+afternoon, about three o'clock, the young man sat at the table with his
+bottle, cigars, and writing materials, and pursued his pleasant labors.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson would never have pretended that it was not highly
+improper to watch one's neighbors. He would have denounced it as
+deserving of the severest reprobation. But he would have said, that if,
+while he was sitting, according to his invariable custom, at his own
+window, for the sole purpose of reading a book, people chose to bring
+themselves within the range of his vision, he was not therefore under
+obligations to vacate his seat. He would have insisted that any glances
+which he might have directed at his neighbors, were so levelled in fits
+of mental abstraction, or in the exercise of a friendly regard for them.
+The Overtop theory he discarded as fallacious, and likely to get its
+talented founder into trouble.
+
+That founder and his only follower, Maltboy, were determined, however,
+to put the new social system into practice on New Year's day, and had
+secured the ready services of Quigg, the grocer, as originally proposed
+by the sagacious Overtop. Marcus Wilkeson obstinately refused to
+participate in this projected grand tour; which refusal was too bad,
+said Overtop, because the fourth seat in the double sleigh that had been
+hired for the occasion would be left vacant.
+
+At last came New Year's day; and the sky was cloudless, and the sun was
+bright, and the weather was just cold enough to make the blood tingle
+pleasantly, and the snow was a foot deep, and well beaten down in the
+side streets. The elements themselves had conspired to give the Overtop
+theory every chance of success.
+
+J.M. Quigg, grocer, was elaborately attiring himself in the snug
+sleeping room behind his store, at ten o'clock on the morning of the
+eventful day. He little knew the tremendous importance of the part which
+he was about to perform. He looked upon Overtop and Maltboy, not as the
+expounders of a new social philosophy, but as cash customers to a
+considerable extent, and as partners in defraying the heavy expenses of
+a large double team. Mr. Quigg exercised the virtue of prudence even in
+his dissipations, and derived pleasure from the reflection that he would
+make his annual round of complimentary calls in an elegant turnout at a
+moderate cost.
+
+Therefore Mr. Quigg hummed pleasantly as he dressed himself, by the aid
+of a large mirror which he had taken for a bad debt, and which was the
+only ornament of the plainly furnished little room. Mr. Quigg was a man
+of business, and never fretted with cravats, nor made himself unhappy on
+the subject of hair. Three turns and a pull adjusted the former; and a
+half dozen well-directed dabs with a stiff brush regulated the latter.
+Fifteen minutes after he began his toilet, he took a comprehensive view
+of himself in the large mirror, and mentally expressed the conviction
+that, for a man of thirty-seven, he was not bad looking.
+
+Quigg was right; and his just opinion of himself was shared by the young
+widows and unmarried ladies of his acquaintance. He was about six feet
+high, with a graceful figure, and the head of a statesman. A more
+intellectual face, and a broader or more massive brow, assisted,
+perhaps, in its general effect, by a slight baldness, were rarely if
+ever seen. A distinguished professor of phrenology had picked out
+Quigg's head from among half an acre of heads at a lecture upon that
+subject in the city, and had pronounced it the "model head," greatly to
+the disgust of all the other large-skulled men in the hall. The
+professor had also assured Quigg, upon learning who and what he was,
+that it was a solemn duty he owed to society to abandon the grocery
+business, and devote himself to "philosophical culture, the development
+of the humanities, and the true expansion of his interior
+individuality." Notwithstanding this flattering opinion, Quigg still
+sanded his sugar, and reduced his whiskey, and found his delight as well
+as his-profit in those gross material pursuits.
+
+The interior Quigg, of whom the professor had spoken so hopefully, was
+still undeveloped. The professor's views of Quigg's head had, however,
+made a deep impression upon the owner of it, and had given to Quigg's
+ordinary observations on the weather, the state of his health, and the
+other familiar topics to which his remarks were principally addressed,
+an oracular importance in his own opinion. Such were the deceptive
+effects produced by his large, polished brow, and slow, imposing speech,
+that he always seemed to be on the point of uttering vital truths. But
+the listener's ear ached in vain for them.
+
+Quigg put on his overcoat, took a small glass of bitters from a bottle
+kept behind the large mirror, locked up the store, proceeded to the
+nearest restaurant, hastily despatched a lean, unsatisfactory chop and a
+cup of weak tea, gave a half dime to the waiter who bade him, in a loud
+and significant voice, "Happy New Year, sir," and then returning found
+the double sleigh punctual to appointment.
+
+It was a swan-shaped vehicle, brightly painted, thickly covered with
+buffalo robes, and drawn by two high-stepping horses, which tossed their
+heads and shook their bells merrily as if they shared in the prevailing
+jovialty of the day.
+
+On the front seat, and nearly filling up the whole width of the sleigh,
+sat the driver. His shoulders were broad enough for two men; his legs
+and arms were of twice the common size, and he had two well-defined
+chins. He seemed to be double in all his dimensions, like the sleigh.
+
+"Hallo, Quigg!" said the driver, in a voice of double strength, snapping
+his whip playfully at that gentleman as he approached.
+
+"Hallo to _you_, Cap," returned Quigg, pleasantly. "It is a very fine
+day. I guess there will be a great many calls made." Quigg uttered these
+words slowly, as if they were precious, and he hated to part with them.
+
+"Shouldn't wonder," answered Cap, which was a short name for Captain
+(nobody knew of what), and added, without any apparent sequence of
+ideas: "I s'pose you're goin' to take some brandy along, old fellow?
+It's hardly fair for me to be sittin' into the cold outside, with
+nothin' to drink, while you chaps are drinkin' your champagne punch
+before a warm fire."
+
+Mr. Quigg reflected a moment, as one who reckons up profit and loss. He
+then said:
+
+"A good idea, Cap. Brandy is not a bad thing on a cold day." He spoke
+with impressive solemnity.
+
+"Or any other day," added the driver. "Partickley 'lection day.
+Leastways, such was the 'pinion of the voters into my ward, last
+December, when I run for School Inspector, you know. Unfortunately, I
+didn't know the ropes then; and thought, when I got the nomination, I
+was sure to be 'lected. My 'ponent issued tickets for free drinks at all
+the rum mills into the ward. I didn't find out his game till about two
+o'clock in the afternoon, and then I tried it myself. But I was too
+late. He had six hours' start of me, and beat me by five hundred
+drinks--I mean votes."
+
+Mr. Quigg nodded, and said, "Of course," as if he had often heard of
+such instances, and there was nothing surprising in them. He then
+abruptly cut off the Captain's political reminiscences, by unlocking the
+store and entering it. After a few minutes' absence, he returned with a
+half-gallon jug and a tin dipper.
+
+"A nice, fat little feller," rapturously exclaimed Captain Tonkins,
+taking the proffered jug. Placing it in the bottom of the sleigh, where
+such of the public as were stirring in that vicinity could not see the
+operation, he half filled the tin dipper, and, raising it suddenly to
+his mouth, drank the contents with a double gulp. "Prime stuff, that,"
+said the Captain, smacking his lips. "A hogshead of it would make a
+school commissioner, an alderman, mebbe a major of you, Quigg."
+
+"I dare say," said Quigg. "But what would a dull, practical fellow like
+me be good for in public life?" This was Quigg's habitual way of
+depreciating himself, and it always impressed the hearer with a sense of
+Quigg's eminent ability.
+
+Quigg then drew a pair of yellow gloves on his large, hairy hands,
+slightly ripping the two thumbs and most of the fingers in the
+operation, took a seat in the double sleigh, and proclaimed himself
+ready to start.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+PLEASURE AS BUSINESS.
+
+Captain Tonkins cracked his whip with professional sonority over the
+heads of his lively horses, and they started off at a slapping pace,
+which brought them to the house of the three friends before the bells
+had fairly begun to jingle in unison. The door was instantly opened, and
+Overtop and Maltboy presented themselves, dressed in the most elaborate
+and captivating style. Marcus Wilkeson appeared just behind them, in his
+dressing gown and slippers, calmly smoking his well-browned Meerschaum.
+
+After the salutations of the day, both Overtop and Maltboy addressed a
+last appeal to Marcus to give up his ridiculous prejudices, and join the
+party; but he obstinately refused, saying that he should make only one
+call, and that was upon the old gentleman over the way.
+
+The arrangements for the day had already been made. The party were to
+call on a few dozen of Quigg's customers (selected from a carefully
+prepared list of one hundred) within range of a mile or two; also on a
+few friends of Overtop and Maltboy, who could not well be slighted, and
+then come back to the block.
+
+Quigg looked upon the day as one of business, and not of pleasure, and
+had methodized a system of callmaking, which was submitted to his
+companions, and highly approved by them. The order of exercises was as
+follows: First, a jerk at the doorbell; second, precipitate entrance,
+hat in hand; third, "Happy New Year," remark on fine weather, and
+introduction of friends; fourth, a second remark on fine weather, or any
+other one remark which might occur to friends on inspiration of moment;
+fifth, acceptance of one sip of wine, and one bite of cake, if any
+offered, with compliments on excellence of both; sixth, reference to
+list in hand, observation on the necessity of retiring, and regret for
+the same; seventh, precipitate retreat.
+
+The system did not work smoothly at first, in consequence of Overtop's
+and Maltboy's strained, excessive efforts to make themselves agreeable.
+It happened that, at the first two or three houses visited, Maltboy
+discovered charming young ladies, and could not resist the temptation to
+linger beyond the prescribed minutes, and talk trifles to them. It also
+fell out, that Overtop found a number of those sensible women for whom
+his heart ever longed, and whose starving souls, as he called them, were
+not to be satisfied with the dry crust of ordinary compliment. To them,
+therefore, he addressed observations on the inner or spiritual
+significance of the New Year's call; on the reminiscences of childhood
+suggested by sleigh bells; on the typical meaning of snow as the shroud
+of death, and, at the same time, the warming garment of coming life; on
+wine or lemonade (as the case might be), as an emblem of hospitality;
+and on many other little things as expressive of the loftiest truths.
+
+It was only after earnest remonstrances from Quigg, that the discursive
+Overtop brought himself down to the rules of the day. In deference to
+Quigg, Mr. Maltboy also steeled his too susceptible heart against the
+attractions which he was perpetually encountering, and kept strictly to
+the weather. He, as well as Overtop, was surprised to find that the
+single stereotyped observation, "It's a fine day," was, after all, more
+acceptable than a longer and more strikingly original remark for it
+imposed no tax upon the conversational resources of the ladies, and left
+them unfatigued to succeeding scores of visitors.
+
+About this time, it was observed of Captain Tonkins that he began to
+show signs of fatigue, rocking heavily in his seat with every
+oscillation of the sleigh, and talking thick like a jaded man. These
+phenomena seeming to require some explanation, the Captain stated that
+he had been up late the past three nights, and could keep himself awake
+only by taking occasional draughts of Quigg's brandy. The Captain then
+proceeded to indulge in random recollections of his political career,
+and withering denunciations of one Larry Mulcahy, his successful rival
+for the office of School Inspector, whom the Captain did not hesitate to
+brand as a jailbird.
+
+When the party returned to the block where the Overtop theory was to be
+tested, Mr. Quigg's services were found invaluable. He had not only been
+the principal grocer in the vicinity for five years, but he had served
+on Ward Committees for the relief of the poor at other people's expense,
+and had participated largely in those admirable institutions for the
+promotion of matrimony known as Sociables. Therefore, Quigg knew about
+everybody on the block worth knowing. There were a few persons in that
+old house near the corner, who sent in for herrings, cheap butter, and
+pounds of flour, and whom, of course, he did not know. There was a queer
+old Dutchman in that square, old-fashioned house in the middle of the
+block, whom neither he nor anybody else knew.
+
+They went through half of the south side of the block, and found only
+plain and commonplace people. Overtop and Maltboy began to be weary. The
+former was gradually discovering that his theory was a bore. The latter
+wondered whether Quigg knew the tall girl, concerning the identity of
+the front part of whose residence Maltboy was at fault, although he knew
+every brick of the rear.
+
+"In this 'ere house," said Quigg, "I shall be treated rudely, because
+they owe me fifty dollars for groceries. It's a curious fact, but I have
+noticed that debtors always act kind o' cold to creditors, as if it was
+the creditors that owed the money."
+
+Mr. Quigg spoke with an important air, as if he had made an original
+discovery in human nature.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+SOMETHING HIDDEN.
+
+While this exploring party were going through the block, Mr. Marcus
+Wilkeson dressed himself with more than usual care, preparatory to a
+call upon the unknown old gentleman over the way, who that very morning
+had appeared at his window, the first time in three days, and tendered
+the compliments of the season in two low bows and a smile. Having
+carefully adjusted his necktie, and smoothed the creases of his gloves,
+Mr. Wilkeson grasped his old friend, a hickory cane, by its sturdy
+elbow, and marched forth to make his solitary visit.
+
+As 'he turned the corner of the street upon which the unknown old
+gentleman's residence was situated, thinking of the oddity of the call
+he was about to make, and half inclined to abandon it, he saw, in a
+doorway a few yards in front of him, a little girl who bore a striking
+resemblance to the patient creature that he had often noticed sitting at
+a window in the room of the pale mechanic. A single glance at the
+cracked and dirty front of the building established its connection with
+the weather-stained and shaky rear premises in which the worker toiled
+at his strange task from morning to night, and far into the
+morning again.
+
+The little girl was earnestly talking with a rough, hungry-looking
+fellow in a greasy cap and tattered blue overalls. As Marcus approached,
+he heard the following fragment of conversation:
+
+"Yer can't fool this child again, now, I tell yer. Why don't he pay me?
+_that's_ what I want to know. I _will_ go up." The man stepped forward,
+as if to ascend the stairs.
+
+"Please don't, Mr. Gilsum," said the girl, in a sweet, pleading tone,
+laying a red and toilworn little hand softly on his arm. "Papa will pay
+you next week. He will, believe me, sir."
+
+"So you told me last week," growled Mr. Gilsum, "and the week before
+that. It's all humbug. Why don't he pay me now? _that's_ what I want to
+know." Again he put a foot forward, and was again restrained by the hand
+of the little girl.
+
+"I have tried very hard to earn money, Mr. Gilsum," said the musical and
+plaintive voice, _but_ have been disappointed. Next week I am sure I
+will have some for you."
+
+"Pshaw!" ejaculated the man, pulling the greasy cap over his eyes in a
+spirit of savage determination. "I can't waste time talking. I _will_
+find out why he don't pay me now."
+
+The inexorable Mr. Gilsum pushed aside the feeble hand of the little
+girl, and was about to go up the stairs in good earnest, when Marcus
+Wilkeson, who had lingered near the door to catch the exact purport of
+the conversation, called out to him:
+
+"Hallo, my friend! what's the row?"
+
+Mr. Gilsum stopped, and, turning, said snappishly:
+
+"None of yer business. Unless," he prudently added, "yer a friend of the
+comical old chap up stairs, and want to pay his debts."
+
+"I am a friend, and I will pay them," rejoined Marcus, speaking from the
+impulse of the moment. Since he had become rich, and could afford the
+luxury, he frequently spoke and acted upon impulse, without regard to
+consequences.
+
+Mr. Gilsum's face suddenly changed from an aspect of moroseness to one
+of bewitching amiability. He stood in the doorway, and said:
+
+"It's only a matter of ten shillings, sir, for brass and screws, and
+little odds and ends from my shop--the locksmith's shop over in the next
+street--you may remember it, sir. I'm sure I don't want to be hard on
+the gentleman."
+
+To cut short explanations, which he hated, Marcus paid the locksmith his
+ten shillings, and suggested that he need not wait longer. The
+locksmith, having received the money, thought it incumbent upon him to
+apologize and explain still further, till Marcus took hold of the door,
+as if to close it, when he accepted the hint, and departed, mumbling an
+apology as he went.
+
+The young girl, who had looked on in amazement, turned a pair of soft
+blue eyes toward the face of the stranger, and said:
+
+"Papa will thank you very much, sir."
+
+Marcus now had an opportunity to observe her more closely. Her figure
+was slightly formed, and undersized for her apparent age of seventeen
+years. Her face would have been plain, but for one peculiarity which
+made it charming, in his practised judgment. This rare excellence was
+her complexion, which showed a perfect pink and white, without
+roughness, spot, or blemish, under the strong light of a noonday sun,
+made more dazzling by its reflection from the snow. Marcus had never
+seen but one such complexion, and that was many years ago. He looked at
+it in silent wonder, until the delicate bloom in the centre of her
+cheeks began to invade the neighboring white, and the large blue eyes
+drooped in confusion.
+
+"Pardon me, my child," said Marcus, in a gentle, reassuring voice.
+
+She looked up, much embarrassed, and said:
+
+"Will you be so good as to walk up and see my poor father, sir? He will
+be delighted to meet a friend, for he is very much in want of one, sir."
+
+"I do not know him, my child; but I should be happy to make his
+acquaintance."
+
+The girl was surprised to learn that her father's benefactor was a
+stranger to him, and looked doubtingly at him for a moment--but only a
+moment--and then ran briskly up the stairs, asking him to follow.
+
+The stairs were uncarpeted, and had little feet-worn hollows in the
+middle of them. The banisters were rickety, and had been notched by the
+knives of reckless tenants. The first and second floors were occupied by
+different families (so Marcus inferred from the distinct set of baby
+cries issuing from each), and the halls were dirty, and flavored with a
+decided odor of washing day. But on the third story he saw a clean,
+white floor, and drew breaths of pure air from an open rear window, and
+heard no noise save the dull sound of filing.
+
+The little girl paused a second at a door bearing the inscription,
+"Private," asked the visitor to please wait, and opened the door just
+wide enough to admit her body, and entered, nearly closing it behind
+her. In the one glance which Marcus then obtained of the interior of the
+room, he saw the pale mechanic hastily rise from a jumble of cog wheels
+before him, and put up a screen to shelter his work from observation,
+after which he stepped forward, or rather sprang, to meet his child.
+
+Mr. Wilkeson heard a few words of hurried conversation between the
+father and daughter, and then the door was thrown wide open, and the
+mechanic stood in full view. He was a man of medium height, of a spare
+build, and attired in faded, seedy black. His head seemed altogether too
+large for his body; and his almost livid complexion, hollow cheeks, and
+gleaming eyes, told a story of constant and consuming thought. The
+strange, fixed glitter of his eyes was unpleasant to behold. Marcus had
+noticed the same thing in insane persons.
+
+"My name is Minford," said the mechanic, in a deep and solemn voice,
+"and I thank you for saving me from the annoying visits of that
+impertinent fellow. I beg, sir, that you will give me your address, and
+assure you that the sum shall positively be repaid to you next week."
+
+"Never mind the repayment," said Marcus, kindly. "The sum was a trifle
+for me."
+
+The mechanic's eyes flashed with new fire, and his lower lip curved
+with pride, as he answered:
+
+"But I shall insist on returning it, sir. We are temporarily poor, sir;
+but we are not beggars yet, I trust that, some day, we shall be in a
+position to confer benefits, instead of receiving them."
+
+Marcus knew that the man was turning over in his mind the troublesome
+question of "MOTIVE," with which so many people like to make themselves
+unhappy; and he therefore said:
+
+"I took the liberty of assisting you, sir, because I am a neighbor of
+yours, living on the other side of the block, in a house which can be
+plainly seen from your window; and I think it is the duty of neighbors
+to be neighborly, on New Year's day at least. My name is Marcus
+Wilkeson."
+
+The mechanic's face assumed a pleasanter expression. "Perhaps," said he,
+"you are the gentleman that I have sometimes seen sitting with a book,
+in a window covered with grape vines?"
+
+"I am," returned Marcus.
+
+"As a scholar, then--as one who is superior to mean motives and vulgar
+curiosity--you are welcome to my poor home. Pray, walk in, sir. Pet,
+give the gentleman a chair."
+
+The girl, whose face had been clouded during the first part of this
+conversation, brightened up at its close, and obeyed her father with
+alacrity, brushing the clean chair with her handkerchief, to make it the
+more acceptable to their visitor. She also took his hat and cane, and
+placed them carefully away.
+
+The room was simply but neatly furnished, and very clean. The hand of
+taste and order was everywhere visible. Snow-white curtains festooned
+the two small windows, and concealed all of a turn-up bedstead but two
+of its legs. A small array of white crockery shone from an open closet;
+and a squat-looking stove, which made the apartment agreeably warm, was
+smartly polished, and was evaporating cheerful music out of a bright
+teakettle. Through a door partly ajar could be seen another room,
+covered with a rag carpet, and the companion of the first in simplicity
+and neatness.
+
+Marcus had not intended to look at the mechanic's corner, which was
+almost completely screened from view, being desirous to justify the high
+opinion which Mr. Minford had expressed of him; but his eyes were
+irresistibly attracted to the mysterious spot, and obtained a clearer
+glimpse, through an open space between the two screens, of a something
+composed of cogwheels, springs, bands, and levers. His host, observing
+this casual glance, much to the guest's mortification, rose, and placed
+the screens close together at right angles, thus shutting out a view of
+the corner.
+
+Mr. Minford opened his lips as if to offer some explanation of the act,
+but did not offer it. A moment afterward, he said:
+
+"I have not always been a poor man, Mr. Wilkeson. Six years ago I
+possessed a handsome fortune, which enabled me to pursue certain
+philosophical experiments, in which I had taken great interest, at
+leisure. An unfortunate speculation in real estate, year before last,
+nearly ruined me. I converted the remains of my property into cash, and
+went on with my experiments, undiscouraged. Like all laborers in the
+cause of science--which is the cause of humanity--I have met with many
+obstacles. Several times, when I have been on the point of perfecting my
+great invention, some small, unforeseen difficulty has occurred,
+compelling me to reconstruct large portions of the machinery. Eighteen
+months passed away, and I found myself penniless. I tried to borrow
+money, but without success. Now, who do you suppose has supported us the
+last three months?"
+
+"Some benevolent relative, perhaps," said Mr. Wilkeson, hazarding a wild
+guess.
+
+"You are right, sir. And a near and dear relative it is--no other than
+my little Pet here." Mr. Minford placed his right hand fondly on the
+shining head of the young girl, who sat on a low stool by his side,
+looking into his face.
+
+She blushed deeply, and said:
+
+"You forget the unknown good friend who sent the letters with money to
+you, papa."
+
+"No, no, I don't, Pet," continued Mr. Minford, patting her playfully on
+the cheeks; "but you were the dearest and sweetest of my guardian
+angels. You know you were, you rogue. Why, sir, you will hardly believe
+it, but this little creature, when she knew our money was nearly gone,
+taught herself the art of embroidery, with the aid of some illustrations
+from an old magazine, and in less than a fortnight could work so
+beautifully, that she was able to earn from three to four dollars a
+week. When she first told me that she was going out to look for work, I
+opposed it fiercely; but the obstinate little Pet would have her way.
+She was lucky enough to get a job from a milliner, and pleased her
+employer so well, that steady work was given to her, until last week,
+when the kind-hearted lady died, and now little Pet has nothing to do.
+Some people think, because she is young--"
+
+"Please don't talk about me any more, papa," said Pet, who had been
+blushing deeply, and looking very beautiful in the visitor's eyes. "You
+forget what the postman used to bring you every Saturday."
+
+"No, I don't, you little, troublesome, impertinent Pet. I was just about
+to speak of it, when you interrupted me. You must know, Mr. Wilkeson,
+that every Saturday the postman, on his first morning round, delivered
+to me a letter, marked 'New York City,' containing two dollars, without
+a word of writing inside, and addressed to me in large capitals, each
+nearly half an inch long. The object of this singular style of address
+was either to make it so plain that the postman could not mistake, or to
+disguise some handwriting which otherwise I might recognize. Now, as I
+have no relatives living, and no friends that I know of, who would lend
+me a dollar except on the best security, I am greatly puzzled, as you
+may suppose, to guess the name of my unknown benefactor. Generous man!
+For aught I know, he may now be dead, or himself reduced to poverty;
+for, last Saturday, the regular weekly remittance failed to come."
+
+"Then I see that I am just in season to help you," said Marcus Wilkeson,
+who, during the recital of this brief history, had decided upon his
+course of action.
+
+"I thank you most gratefully," returned Mr. Minford, "and fully
+appreciate the noble motives of your conduct. Your appearance convinces
+me that you are entirely disinterested. But I should feel ashamed to
+take money from you, without giving some security for its repayment. I
+shall therefore insist upon making over to you a certain interest in the
+invention, the most valuable of modern times, which lies almost finished
+behind those screens. Let me give you some idea of it, and you can then
+decide how much money you will advance, merely as a matter of business.
+I cannot consent to put our negotiations upon any other ground. The
+invention, then, is--" The speaker looked at the corner as he spoke,
+and paused.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson knew that the inventor was about to part with his secret
+unwillingly, and that he would regret it forever after. To save him from
+unpleasant feelings on that score, and to maintain friendly relations
+between them for the future, Marcus put a stop to the reluctant
+disclosure. He said:
+
+"Never mind it, Mr. Minford. I know nothing of mechanical matters, and
+take no interest in them. Your explanation would only be wasted on me.
+Besides, it is entirely uncalled for, as I am willing to take your own
+opinion of the invention, and will pay you five hundred dollars for a
+one-tenth interest in it, if those terms will suit." Marcus took a keen
+delight in acting upon this singular impulse, and was sorry he had not
+said a "thousand," when he saw the glow of happiness that irradiated the
+sweet face of Pet, still sitting on the stool by her father's side.
+
+[Illustration: THE BOY BOG]
+
+"Heaven bless you, sir!" said Mr. Minford. "You will be the means not
+only of relieving me and my dear child, but also of conferring the boon
+of a great discovery upon mankind. But your terms are too liberal,
+sir. I shall insist upon assigning one fifth of my right to you, which,
+mark my prediction, will prove of itself a fortune. Furthermore, I feel
+that I ought, if only to show my complete confidence in you, to tell you
+what it is. It is--" Mr. Minford hesitated for a word.
+
+"Now I beg, as a particular favor, that you won't tell me," said Marcus,
+goodhumoredly. "If you bore me with any of those dull details,
+I'll--I'll take back my offer. As to the proportion of the invention
+which I am to have, I will accept one fifth, since you insist on it, not
+because I want it, but that we may not say another word about
+the matter."
+
+"As you please, sir. But how shall I sufficiently thank you?"
+
+Marcus, who was already overcome with the gratitude which shone from the
+large, soft eyes of the young girl, answered, with a laugh and a blush
+(he had not outgrown the habit of reddening on occasions):
+
+"By changing the subject."
+
+Mr. Minford was about to protest against this extraordinary method of
+thanking a benefactor, when a rap was heard at the door.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+THE BOY BOG.
+
+In reply to the invitation, "Come in," a tall boy opened the door, and
+started back on seeing a stranger.
+
+"Do come in, Bog," said Mr. Minford. "I have good news to tell you. This
+is a friend of ours, Mr. Wilkeson. What with his running of errands, and
+doing little jobs for us, we really couldn't get along without him. Oh,
+walk in, Bog; you're always welcome here."
+
+"Now _do_ come in, Bog," added the little girl, in a winning tone,
+rising from her stool, stepping to the door, and placing a hand on
+his shoulder.
+
+The new comer, after a few shuffles on the threshold, and an
+unintelligible murmur of words, walked in with painful awkwardness, and
+took a seat upon a corner of the chair which Pet offered him, as if the
+whole chair were more of a favor than he could conscientiously accept;
+He was a bony, strongly built stripling, with a record of anywhere from
+seventeen to nineteen years written in his red, resolute, honest face.
+He wore a coarse but neat suit of boy's clothes, one inch too small in
+every dimension, a white turn-down collar, and a black neckerchief
+fastidiously tied; and carried a slouched cloth cap in his hand, with
+which he slapped his knees alternately, after he had taken a seat, and
+continued to do so without cessation.
+
+"Well, Bog," said Mr. Minford, kindly, but condescendingly, "you are
+just in time to hear good news. This gentleman has taken a partnership
+in my invention (Mr. Minford thought it best to state the case that
+way), and, with his assistance, I shall be able to complete it and bring
+it before the public immediately."
+
+"Glad to hear it, sir," answered the boy Bog, blushing hard, lifting his
+eyes from the floor long enough to glance at Mr. Minford and his
+daughter, and all the while slapping his knees vigorously.
+
+"He is in the bill-posting business," said Mr. Minford to Marcus. "You
+may have seen him at the head of his company of walking advertisers.
+Ha! ha!"
+
+Marcus remembered having seen that honest face, that thick head of hair,
+and that identical cap, sticking out of the top of a portable wooden
+frame covered with placards, setting forth the virtues of quack
+medicines, the excellencies of dry goods, or the unequalled attractions
+of concert saloons. He also remembered that this wooden frame was much
+taller than any of the long procession of frames which followed it, and
+that, from a hole in the right side thereof, protruded a fist about the
+size of the boy Bog's, clutching a broomstick, with which the inmate
+kept a semblance of order among the wilful and eccentric occupants of
+the frames behind him. "Oh, yes; I have seen you very often, Bog. How
+do you like the business?" said Marcus, pleasantly.
+
+"Very well, sir, thank you," replied Bog, with his eyes still on the
+floor, "'cept when the boys poke fun at us; 'cos we can't run after 'em
+in them boxes, and wollop 'em. 'S rather hard, that." Bog caught Miss
+Minford's eye as he concluded these remarks, and blushed till he
+perspired, to think that he should have dropped such a brutal
+observation in presence of that young lady.
+
+Mr. Minford noticed the confusion of his young friend, and
+unintentionally added to it, by saying:
+
+"Bog is a good boy. By his industry, he earns eight or ten dollars a
+week, not only supporting himself, but his aunt."
+
+"Not this week, nor last week neither, Mr. Minford," said Bog, mopping
+the modest sweat from his brow with the sleeve of his coat. "The
+adv'tisin' line a'n't as good as't used to be. I only got three jobs
+with my company the last fortnight, and nary cent of pay from any of
+'em. Of course, all my boys had to be paid just the same."
+
+"And you paid them?" asked Marcus.
+
+"Certainly," said Bog.
+
+"Then be good enough to accept five dollars from me, as a reward for
+your honesty," said Marcus, acting upon another of his impulses.
+
+"No, thank you, sir. No, thank you," returned Bog, quickly, to prevent
+Marcus from pulling the money out of his pocket. "I sha'n't take it,
+sir; I won't have it anyway. I'm goin' into the reg'lar bill-postin'
+business, as Jack Fink's assistant, to-morrow, and can earn all I want."
+Bog blushed, but this time with honest pride, though he was flustered to
+look up and see that Miss Minford nodded in approval of his
+independent spirit.
+
+Bog then slapped each knee about a dozen times with his cap, and
+betrayed many symptoms of fever heat and great mental distress. After
+which, he said that he had only called to see if he could do
+anything for them.
+
+"Now do you mean to tell us that it is not a regular New Year's call,"
+said Mr. Minford, playfully, "and that you have not a dozen more
+to make?"
+
+Bog looked guilty of an enormous fraud, dropped his cap, in his
+confusion, twice, murmured something inaudible, rose to his feet, and
+backed out of the room, making one comprehensive bow to everybody, and
+saying "Good-night" before it was two P.M.
+
+As Bog shut the door, everybody laughed, but not so loud as to be heard
+by the boy; and, under the cover of the general good humor, Marcus rose,
+and said that he must go. He was afraid he had made his visit too long
+for a first one. He would call again on the following day, if agreeable,
+and complete the proposed arrangement. In conclusion, he placed his card
+in Mr. Minford's hand, with the names of a few references pencilled on
+the margin.
+
+Mr. Minford was very sorry that their pleasant acquaintance should take
+his leave so abruptly, and hoped that they would enjoy many visits from
+him, not merely as a business partner (Mr. Minford laid emphasis on
+this), but as a friend.
+
+Pet repeated her father's regrets and hopes in the more impressive
+language of her sweet eyes, and, for the twentieth time that day,
+conjured up, in the memory of Marcus Wilkeson, a vague reminiscence of
+the distant past.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII.
+
+MALTBOY'S TWENTIETH AFFAIR.
+
+The house which had elicited Quigg's last sagacious remark, was a
+three-story brownstone front, and was one of the finest looking on the
+south side. The heavy mahogany door was opened by a slovenly girl, who
+ushered the callers into the front parlor, which was carefully darkened,
+according to the custom of the day. The only objects plainly visible
+were two female figures, each seated near a front window, under the
+rosy shade of damask curtains artfully disposed. One of the ladies, whom
+Matthew Maltboy was not slow to recognize, looked like a fountain of
+pink silk, gushing out with great vehemence in high, curving jets on
+every side; from which fountain a slim, graceful figure had risen, as
+far as the waist, like a modern Arethusa. The gleam of a shapely neck,
+of a pearl necklace and diamond cross, of diamond earrings, of an
+enormous gold brooch, of golden gyves an inch broad on each wrist, as
+the rose-tinted rays fell on those natural and artificial charms,
+produced a dazzling effect in the shady corner. On plainer persons, this
+display might have seemed, in Maltboy's eyes, a glaring instance of bad
+taste. But, looking at that small, oval face, those large, flashing
+black eyes, complexion of red and white, so beautifully blended that it
+hardly seemed a work of nature, pouting lips, even, white teeth, and
+heavily braided hair, Maltboy thought that no decorations could be-too
+gaudy for a creature of such radiant loveliness.
+
+At the same instant (as their feet passed the parlor threshold) that
+Maltboy made these comprehensive observations, the quick eyes of Fayette
+Overtop were scanning the lady that basked in the subdued light of the
+other window. She rose from a smaller fountain of silk to a less height
+than her companion. She was fat to such a degree, that the bodice of her
+dress seemed ready to burst with the excessive pressure beneath,
+immediately suggesting to every beholder the obvious humanity of
+enlarging it, by taking only a small portion from the superfluous silk
+below. She was quite pretty, and very healthy, and had a smile lurking
+on her lips, and in the corners of her small blue eyes, and in the
+dimples of her round, red cheeks, and in the curved crease which was
+beginning to show under her apple of a chin. She wore plain colors, and
+exhibited no ornaments save a large brooch with braided hair in it. The
+lean Overtop immediately felt a tender inclination toward this fat
+young lady.
+
+Mr. Quigg paid the compliments of the season in his neat, settled
+style, to Miss Whedell--the tall young lady--who received them with
+marked coldness, and then begged leave to introduce Messrs. Overtop and
+Maltboy, to whom she smiled graciously, rising slightly from her chair,
+and sinking back again, without disturbing the symmetrical flow of the
+silken fountain. With a wave of her jewelled right hand she performed
+the ceremony of introduction between the three callers and Mrs.
+Frump--the fat young lady--who also carefully raised herself about two
+inches from her chair, and lowered herself again, without disarranging
+a ripple.
+
+In compliance with an invitation from Miss Whedell, the three callers
+sat down. Mr. Maltboy gravitated by a natural instinct to the side of
+his charmer. Mr. Overtop was drawn by an irresistible impulse into the
+vicinity of Mrs. Frump, having detected in her general appearance
+certain indications of what he called "a sensible woman." Mr. Quigg,
+feeling that he was one too many, took a "seat equally removed from the
+two ladies, and commenced playing soft tunes on his hat, and looking
+vacantly about the room.
+
+"I had begun to wonder, Mr. Maltboy," said Miss Whedell, "what makes our
+friends so backward to-day. I do declare, we have not had a caller for
+more than--how long is it, Gusty, since Colonel Bigford dropped in?"
+
+Maltboy thought her voice had a sweet, metallic ring.
+
+"About half an hour," replied Mrs. Frump, after a brief mental
+calculation.
+
+"Why, Gusty!" exclaimed Miss Whedell; "how can you sit there and tell
+such stories? You know it is not five minutes."
+
+"Just as you please, dear," said Mrs. Frump, leaving on the minds of her
+hearers the impression that her estimate was the correct one.
+
+"I never saw anything so slow," pursued Miss Whedell. "Would you believe
+it, Mr. Maltboy--here are two hours gone, and we have not had more
+than--how many callers have we had, Gusty? You keep account of them."
+
+Mrs. Frump drew out a little memorandum book from one of her pockets,
+and consulted. "Exactly eleven, Clemmy," said she.
+
+"Gusty Frump," returned Miss Whedell, with some warmth, "you ought to be
+ashamed of yourself! We have had fifty callers, to my certain
+knowledge."
+
+"I presume you are right," said Mrs. Frump, with a smile that irradiated
+the whole of her fat face, and again imparted the idea that Miss Whedell
+was wrong.
+
+"For one," said Matthew Maltboy, improving the opportunity to put in a
+word, "I should not be surprised to learn that you had a hundred."
+
+Miss Whedell appreciated the delicate compliment, and beamed fascination
+upon him.
+
+"It has been a horrid, dreary winter, has it not, Mr. Maltboy?" said
+she, in a tone that invited sympathy and confidence.
+
+Mr. Maltboy, supposing that she alluded to the prevalent snow and ice of
+the season, said that it certainly had.
+
+"No balls, no opera--or none to speak of--no parties, no anything. You
+will hardly believe it, Mr. Maltboy, but I declare I haven't been to
+twenty parties this winter--have I, Gusty?"
+
+"To only two that I know of," responded Mrs. Frump, in a winning voice.
+
+"You provoking creature," said Miss Whedell, "to talk so, when you know
+that I have been to at least eighteen parties!" Miss Whedell scowled
+charmingly as she spoke, and then added, with a pleasant smile, for the
+benefit of Mr. Maltboy: "She's a gay young widow; and you know what
+widows are."
+
+Mr. Maltboy's knowledge of that species of the human family was
+extensive and exact. He nodded, to signify that he knew something of
+them, and felt forearmed, from that moment, against the charms of
+Mrs. Frump.
+
+Mrs. Frump told Miss Whedell that she thanked her very much for the
+compliment, and laughed so prettily, that Fayette Overtop determined to
+apply some of his grand tests for the discovery of sensible women.
+
+Abandoning the vein of commonplace conversation which he had worked
+during the five minutes since his arrival, he remarked:
+
+"It really makes us feel young again--does it not, Mrs. Frump?--to renew
+this charming custom of receiving and making calls."
+
+Mr. Overtop spoke in general terms, like a philosopher; whereas Mrs.
+Frump made a personal application of the remark to herself, and replied,
+rather coldly: "I have no doubt that it makes _old_ persons feel
+younger," and then she looked at Matthew Maltboy, and seemed to be
+listening to the conversation between him and Miss Whedell.
+
+Mr. Overtop paused a moment, and tried again: "Is it not pleasant,
+though sad, Mrs. Frump, to think of the friends whom we knew many, many
+years ago, who no longer live to greet us on this festal day?" The
+speaker alluded to mankind at large.
+
+Mrs. Frump responded tartly, that she could not speak from experience,
+of course, but she presumed that Mr. Overtop's opinion was correct. And
+again she glanced at Maltboy.
+
+Mr. Overtop briefly rested, and then remarked:
+
+"It may be merely a poetical conceit of mine, but it seems to me that
+the horses prance higher, and shake their bells more merrily on New
+Year's than any other day, as if they partook in our enjoyment of the
+occasion. May not the horse, by some mysterious instinct, know that it
+is the beginning of the year?"
+
+Mrs. Frump smiled, and answered: "Not being a horse, of course I can't
+say. But I would suggest, whether ostlers do not give their animals an
+extra quantity of oats on New Year's day, to make their action
+more stylish?"
+
+Mr. Overtop marked a quizzical expression in the widow's left eye, and
+was disgusted.
+
+For the third time she looked intently at Matthew Maltboy, who was
+putting in a few words with great animation; and then turned her face
+toward Mr. Quigg, who was taking his third mental inventory of the
+furniture, and executing "Hail Columbia," with variations, on his hat.
+
+"It's a finer New Year's day than the last one, is it not, Mr. Quigg?"
+
+Mr. Quigg, who had an astonishing memory for dates and conditions of the
+weather, replied, after a second's reflection:
+
+"It is a much finer day, Mrs. Frump. It rained last New Year's. Perhaps
+you may remember my leaving an umbrella at the house where you were then
+stopping, in Sixteenth street, and my calling for it again, on which
+occasion you said I reminded you of Paul Pry, in the play, who was
+always forgetting his umbrella."
+
+The widow laughed, and said that she distinctly remembered the
+circumstances.
+
+Mr. Quigg, thus encouraged, went on:
+
+"New Year's days differ very much. The one before the last was very
+snowy in the forenoon, with hail in the afternoon; and the one before
+that was so mild, that I found an overcoat really uncomfortable. The
+one before--"
+
+"Excuse me for the interruption," said Mrs. Frump, suddenly, "but I
+can't help saying how much Mr. Maltboy looks like Dr. Warts. Doesn't
+he, Clemmy?"
+
+"Like Dr. Warts!" exclaimed Miss Whedell. "Who's he?"
+
+"Why, don't you remember, Clemmy, the doctor that you consulted about
+your hair?" The widow looked the picture of guilelessness as she asked
+the question.
+
+Miss Whedell turned slightly red in parts of her face that were not red
+before, and involuntarily raised her hands to two heavy braids of hair
+which fronted each ear, and adjusted them. Then she said, sarcastically:
+
+"Mr. Maltboy must feel much flattered at being compared with a notorious
+quack."
+
+Mrs. Frump, with a laugh spreading all over her gentle face, replied:
+
+"Oh! of course you call him a quack, because he could not save your--"
+
+"You are rude, madam," said Miss Whedell, with emotion.
+
+"And you are silly, miss," retorted Mrs. Frump, still smiling, "to take
+offence at nothing."
+
+"You ought to be ashamed of yourself, madam."
+
+Greatly to the relief of the three callers, who were seized with a
+desire to laugh aloud during this short, snapping dialogue, a bell rang,
+and a new figure entered upon the scene. The two ladies rose about three
+inches, and greeted him as Mr. Chiffield. Mr. Chiffield bowed stiffly,
+smiled mechanically, and cast a sweeping glance at the three men
+present. This glance, and the looks with which it was met, called up a
+singular train of associations.
+
+Maltboy remembered the new comer as a fellow who had trod on his corns
+getting into an Amity street stage. Overtop remembered him as an
+eccentric individual, who always carried, without the slightest
+reference to existing weather, an umbrella under his arm, with the point
+rearward, and held at just the angle to pierce the eye of a person
+walking incautiously after him. Overtop had frequently felt a strong
+inclination to pull the umbrella out from behind, and ask the bearer to
+carry it in a less threatening manner.
+
+Mr. Chiffield, on the other hand, readily recalled Matthew Maltboy as a
+suspicious person whom he had seen hanging around an up-town hotel,
+about a year and a half before (when Maltboy was paying his ineffectual
+addresses to a cruel Cuban beauty who passed the summer months at that
+house). Mr. Chiffield had always supposed him to be a confidence man of
+superior abilities.
+
+Of Overtop, Mr. Chiffield was vaguely reminiscent. Unless he was
+mistaken, that person was the one who wore an entire suit of pepper and
+salt, including a felt hat, necktie, and gaiters, two summers before.
+
+Mr. Quigg was a novelty in Mr. Chiffield's eyes; but Mr. Chiffield was
+well known by sight to Mr. Quigg, who also remembered to have heard that
+he was a partner in the great drygoods house of Upjack, Chiffield & Co.
+
+Mr. Chiffield was about forty years of age, and had a bald head, a
+square, heavy face, scanty whiskers, small, shrewd eyes, and a bilious
+complexion. He dressed in profound black, wore his necktie negligently,
+exhibited neither ring nor breastpin nor gold chain, spoke as if he were
+always thinking inwardly of his private business, and never laughed.
+These peculiarities indicated, beyond any doubt, that Mr. Chiffield was
+a wealthy man; though it might be difficult to trace the exact processes
+of reasoning by which this conclusion was reached. Any unprejudiced
+stranger, seeing Mr. Chiffield, and being told that he was a partner in
+a large drygoods house, would instantly think, "That drygoods house will
+stand in the midst of fires, earthquakes, and financial revulsions."
+
+With that fine instinct peculiar to lovers, Matthew Maltboy immediately
+recognized in Mr. Chiffield a rival--and a dangerous one. Having seen
+much of society, Maltboy was well aware that Mr. Chiffield's mature age,
+his grim appearance, his sparse whiskers, and even the bald spot on the
+top of his head, were eminent advantages with which youth and bloom, and
+a full head of hair could not cope--unless with the aid of that
+fascination which Matthew flattered himself that he possessed, and
+which, he thought, he had used to some purpose during his hurried
+conversation with his twentieth enslaver, Miss Whedell. The usages of
+New Year's day, as well as frequent impatient nods from Quigg, and
+suggestive coughs from Overtop, would not permit of his staying longer.
+He therefore, rose to take his leave, his fellow pilgrims doing
+likewise, when Miss Whedell remarked that they were in a great hurry,
+and regretted that they could not remain a few minutes more.
+
+The captivated Maltboy toyed, with his hat in an uncertain way, and was
+half disposed to sit down again, when Quigg hastily produced his
+visiting list, and said, with his best business smile:
+
+"We Should certainly be very happy, Miss Whedell; but we have
+seventy-five calls still to make, and it is now (consulting his watch)
+two o'clock."'
+
+As the three visitors withdrew (declining, at every step, a pressing
+invitation to taste the refreshments which were piled in mountainous
+form on a table in an adjoining alcove), Maltboy exchanged a look of
+deep, sentimental meaning with Miss Whedell, who rose at least six
+inches from her chair, and followed it with a slight hostile glare at
+Mr. Chiffield, upon whose equable face it fell harmless. Overtop bowed
+coldly to everybody, as if he were disappointed in the human species;
+and Quigg gave a parting grin at the room in general, and at nobody or
+nothing in particular,
+
+"We're all right, Top," whispered Maltboy, as they descended the steps
+to the sidewalk. "She smiled slightly when I mentioned having seen her
+from our back parlor window. I have obtained permission to call again."
+
+"You'll have to do it without me, my dear fellow," returned Overtop,
+tossing back his head from force of habit, the offensive cowlick being
+then suppressed by his hat. "Nothing on earth could induce me to speak
+to that dull widow again."
+
+"She doesn't live there," said Quigg. "She is some connection, I
+believe, of the queer old Dutchman that I spoke of, and is probably only
+helping Miss Whedell to receive callers. I should think, from the way
+they abuse each other, that they were old and dear friends."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX.
+
+MRS. SLAPMAN AT HOME.
+
+Full of new and pleasant thoughts, Marcus Wilkeson walked on toward the
+half-antique house which contained the strange old gentleman. Just as he
+was about to swing back the iron gate of the front yard, he saw, at a
+distance, the two friends of his bosom and Mr. Quigg descending a flight
+of steps to the sidewalk. They saw him at the same time; and both
+Overtop and Maltboy violently beckoned him to approach. Mr. Quigg added
+his solicitations in a calmer and more dignified manner, moving his arm
+like an automaton three times from the elbow. Even the driver, Captain
+Tonkins, in the spirit of invitation peculiar to his mental state,
+steadied himself on the seat, poked his right arm and his long whip
+toward Marcus, and said: "Hu-hullo there--come along?" Having done this,
+Captain Tonkins furtively poured a gill of brandy into the tin cup, and
+drank it under cover of the buffalo robe.
+
+In compliance with this general request, Marcus forbore to open the gate
+of the old gentleman's house, and joined his friends.
+
+"How many people have you called on, you old humbug?" asked Overtop, as
+Marcus drew near.
+
+Marcus was on the point of alluding to the chance acquaintances that he
+had made that morning; but a moment's reflection stopped him.
+
+"I told you," said he, "that my only visit was to be to our odd old
+neighbor. I was at his gate, when you called. And now, what do
+you want?"
+
+"I want to tell you," said Matthew Maltboy, "that Miss Whedell--the
+Juno-like young lady with the handkerchief, you know--is--"
+
+"All your fancy painted her," interrupted Marcus.
+
+"She's lovely--she's divine," said Maltboy, rapturously finishing the
+quotation. "I have made an impression. Congratulate me, old boy!"
+
+"I do," said Marcus, laughing, "and only hope that you will find it as
+easy getting out of the scrape as into it. And what have you
+discovered, Top?"
+
+"That there isn't a sensible woman or an original idea, so far, on the
+block. I wouldn't budge an inch farther, but for Quigg's promise to
+introduce me to a young widow who lives next door--a regular prodigy of
+science and art, according to his story. I think you said she was a
+widow, Quigg?"
+
+"I suppose so," said Quigg, "as I never saw nor heard of her husband;
+and she's lived on this block five years last May."
+
+The three besieged Marcus to lay aside his scruples for once, and join
+them in visiting this accomplished lady. Marcus fought them until his
+patience was exhausted, and then gave in.
+
+The door to which they climbed, bore, on a large and shining plate, the
+name "Slapman." This door was opened to them by a tall negro in livery,
+which, like the wearer, had a borrowed appearance. As they entered, they
+saw a little wiry man, with a pale face full of wrinkles and crowsfeet,
+bounding up the first flight of stairs, two steps at a time. When the
+little man reached the first landing he looked back, and directed a
+strange, suspicious glance at the callers.
+
+The opening of the parlor door discovered a room full of men, who were
+sipping wine, eating cold fowl and confections, talking and laughing
+loudly with each other, or exchanging repartees with a lady who stood in
+the centre of the apartment and shed her light upon all. This lady was
+Mrs. Grazella Jigbee Slapman.
+
+Previous to her marriage, she had been not altogether unknown to the
+corners of several weekly newspapers, under the name of "Grazella." She
+had also cultivated a natural talent for painting, so assiduously, that
+a little cabinet piece of hers, representing a cat, a lobster, and a
+plate of fruit, was considered good enough to exhibit in the window of a
+Broadway print shop, in which her uncle was a silent partner, and was
+approvingly paragraphed in a paper partly owned by her first cousin. To
+gifts capable of producing results like these, she added a great
+aptitude for music; although an incurable indolence, she gracefully
+said, had always prevented her from learning the piano. While yet
+sustaining the name of Jigbee, she had achieved a high reputation in
+private circles as a merciless judge of music. But her conversation had
+been, from earliest girlhood, her chief attraction. She possessed the
+extraordinary faculty of talking with a dozen persons upon a dozen
+different subjects at the same time.
+
+Unlike many people similarly endowed, she did not exercise this
+wonderful gift for the brutal purpose of putting down feebler
+intellects, but only to elicit TRUTH, which she often declared to be the
+sole object of her existence. When, by her alliance with Mr. Slapman, a
+thrifty speculator in real estate, she was installed as mistress of a
+fine house and furniture, and a few thousand a year, the lady naturally
+gathered about her a still larger circle of admirers. Her researches for
+TRUTH were met halfway by people that were supposed to deal in that
+article, abstractly considered; such as poets, painters, sculptors,
+reformers, inventors. Anybody with a new idea was sure to be understood
+and encouraged by her. Her fondness for new ideas was as keen as an
+entomologist's for new bugs or butterflies.
+
+Mrs. Slapman had not made the mistake of neglecting her physical and
+perishable charms in deference to her intellectual and immortal nature.
+She was twenty-four years old, and had clear, sparkling eyes, a fresh
+complexion, good teeth, rich, heavy hair, and a substantial figure. The
+pursuit of TRUTH did not disagree with her health.
+
+Mrs. Slapman bustled out of the little knot of persons about her, and
+advanced in a frank, hearty way to meet her visitors. To Mr. Quigg she
+nodded patronizingly, as to one whom she had long known to be guiltless
+of new ideas; but to the strangers who sought her society, she addressed
+a cordial smile.
+
+Mr. Quigg, having performed his office, judiciously stepped aside, and
+left the honors and burdens of conversation with the three friends.
+
+Matthew Maltboy, with the rashness of youth, opened the verbal
+engagement, by remarking that it was a fine day.
+
+This wretched conventionalism was met by a "Very," so obviously
+sarcastic, that Marcus Wilkeson decided not to utter a remark which was
+at that moment on his lips.
+
+At this embarrassing juncture, Fayette Overtop came to the rescue. "As
+we alighted from our sleigh, Mrs. Slapman, I noticed how firmly the snow
+at the edge of the street was pressed down by the feet of the hundreds
+who have called on you; and I could not but think how truly that white
+surface, upon which the prints of so many boots were beautifully
+blended, typified the purity of the motives which brought the owners of
+those boots to your door."
+
+"A most original and charming remark!" said Mrs. Slapman. "I must repeat
+it to Chickson. The author of 'A Snowflake's Lament' will appreciate
+that felicitous observation. You have heard of Chickson?"
+
+Mr. Overtop read new books, magazines, literary papers, in considerable
+quantities, but did not remember to have ever met with the name.
+Speaking upon impulse, and to avoid explanation, however, he said:
+
+"Oh, yes--certainly, but have not the pleasure of his acquaintance."
+
+"You should know each other," said Mrs. Slapman. "Excuse me a minute."
+She ran with girlish haste to the other end of the parlors, and brought
+back an undersized young man. When he had been introduced to Overtop,
+and shaken hands with him, the enthusiastic hostess quoted, somewhat
+imperfectly, the beautiful conceit which Overtop had just uttered, and
+remarked that it would be a capital subject for a poem.
+
+Mr. Chickson turned his eyes upward to the ceiling, and then downward to
+the floor, as if he were committing what he had heard to memory, and
+then said it was very curious, but he had thought of the same theme
+before, and was intending to write a poem on it next week.
+
+"Now, that's just like you, you provoking creature!" said Mrs. Slapman,
+tapping the poet playfully with her fan. "It's really selfish of you to
+keep all your poetical thoughts for your poems."
+
+Mr. Chickson smiled pleasantly, but said nothing; and when Mrs.
+Slapman's attention was momentarily attracted by a passing remark from
+another person, the poet improved the opportunity to slip away and take
+another glass of champagne in the corner.
+
+"Ah! gone, is he?" said Mrs. Slapman, remarking his disappearance.
+"Though one of the most promising of our young poets, he is dull enough
+in conversation. It may be said of him, as of Goldsmith, 'He writes like
+an angel, but talks like poor Poll.' You may have read his poem, 'Echoes
+of the Empyrean,' published in the _Weekly Lotus_."
+
+Mr. Overtop was wicked enough to say that he had read and admired it.
+
+"It is a curious fact in the history of the poem, that the subtle
+thoughts which it evolves were the topic of discussion at one of my
+_conversazioni_; and on that very night Chickson told me he had
+forty-five lines written on the subject. The knowledge of that trifling
+circumstance lends additional interest to the poem."
+
+"That is, if anything could lend additional interest to it," observed
+Overtop.
+
+"You are right," said Mrs. Slapman. "TRUTH, like that which animates
+every line of the 'Empyrean,' needs no factitious attractions. You have
+read the 'Empyrean?'"--turning to Wilkeson and Maltboy, who had stood
+hard by during this conversation, calm patterns of politeness.
+
+Mr. Wilkeson, not understanding the question (his thoughts wandering
+back to the pale mechanic and his child), nodded "Yes," and was
+immediately put down on Mrs. Slapman's mental tablet as a quiet
+gentleman of good taste. But Matthew Maltboy, distinctly understanding
+it, was candid enough to say "No," and from that moment was as nothing
+in the eyes of the lady.
+
+Overtop proceeded to deepen the favorable impression which he had made
+upon this charming patroness of intellect.
+
+"Did it ever occur to you how many subjects for the highest order of
+poetry lie unnoticed all about us? Take that chandelier, for example,
+the prismatic drops of which are dull in the shade, but sparkle with
+all the colors of the rainbow in the gaslight. Might not those hidden
+splendors be compared to that genius whose brilliancy is alone evoked by
+Beauty's radiant smile?"
+
+Marcus Wilkeson squirmed, and Matthew Maltboy felt uneasy, while their
+friend was delivering this elaborate idea, and felt easier when he
+reached the end in safety. Mr. Overtop himself shared in the sensation
+of relief.
+
+"Beautiful! beautiful!" cried Mrs. Slapman, in a species of rapture. "I
+must repeat that delicious thought to Chickson. But not now." And she
+looked inquiringly at Overtop, as if in expectation that he would utter
+another new TRUTH immediately. That gentleman not happening to have one
+on his tongue's end, Mrs. Slapman was kind enough to give him time for
+reflection.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X.
+
+INFIRMITIES OF GENIUS.
+
+"Allow me to point out some of my friends, Mr. Overtop. Among them are
+faces which you may have seen. If not, you will at least recognize
+several of the names."
+
+"But I must protest that I am monopolizing too much of your time,
+madam," interposed Overtop, conscious that his neglected friends were
+looking on awkwardly, and waiting for him.
+
+"And I protest against your protesting," said Mrs. Slapman, with a merry
+laugh. So saying, she motioned him to one of the front windows, and,
+under the shade of heavy blue and gold curtains, commenced to point out
+notable guests.
+
+Mr. Overtop observed, first with regret and then with pride, that their
+withdrawal into a corner elicited looks of surprise and curiosity, not
+unmingled with envy, from the little group that hovered about the
+refreshment table, and drank Mrs. Slapman's fine wines, and laughed and
+joked together. He was glad to see that his two friends sauntered
+through the parlors, examining the pictures and articles of taste which
+caught the eye on every side; and that Mr. Quigg was engrossed in the
+examination of some books on a centre table, opening them, and smoothing
+their fair pages with his hand as if they were ledgers.
+
+"You see that stout man with the double chin--the one drinking
+champagne, to the left of the table? That is Mr. Scrymser, a gentleman
+who has made several aeronautic excursions, and talked about a balloon
+voyage to Europe last year. You may remember his portrait, and plans of
+his air ship, in the illustrated papers."
+
+"I do," said Overtop; "and also that he didn't go." "Precisely. Some
+trouble about the currents, I believe. You note that small man, with the
+sharp face--the one sipping a glass, to the right of the table? That is
+Mr. Boskirk, inventor of the _'Submarine Summer House,'_ a species of
+diving bell, which is to be owned and managed by a Joint-Stock Company.
+I have promised to take a few shares in the concern."
+
+"Excuse the digression, madam," said Overtop, "but ought not these two
+gentlemen to change places in life? Is not the heavy one peculiarly
+adapted to the diving bell, and the light one to the balloon?"
+
+Mrs. Slapman smiled, and looked faintly surprised, as if the remark were
+unworthy of her guest. "Probably you know that gentleman under the
+picture of a landscape, talking very earnestly to another gentleman, who
+seems to want to be getting away."
+
+"The man with the long, curly, red hair? I know his face well, and,
+though I have no further knowledge of him, am morally certain that he is
+a social reformer."
+
+"Why?" asked Mrs. Slapman.
+
+"Because I never saw a man with long, curly, red hair, who was not a
+social reformer. Men with red hair--the true carrot tint, I mean--have a
+natural propensity for reform. Some of them repress it, but others give
+rein to their inclinations, go into the reform business, and hang out
+their curls as a sign to all mankind. And all mankind interpret it as
+readily as they do the striped pole in front of a barber's shop."
+
+"A striking thought, truly, and full of TRUTH," said Mrs. Slapman. "I
+will mention it to Mr. Gormit. On reflection, however, I won't. I might
+wound his feelings, for he is an exquisitely sensitive creature. As you
+have ingeniously discovered, he _is_ a social reformer. At present he is
+only known to the public as the editor of the 'Humanitarian Harbinger;'
+but his select circle of friends are well aware that he is devoting his
+ripened genius to the production of a work called the 'Progressional
+Principia,' which will be in four volumes, and exhaust the whole subject
+of social science. This immense undertaking is a favorite subject of his
+ordinary conversation. He is probably, at this very moment, giving a
+general outline of the book to that gentleman on his right.
+
+"That slender young man with the Vandyke beard, cutting into a cake, you
+may not need to be told, is Patching, the painter of those delicious
+interiors which have been seen every year by those who had eyes to find
+them, in obscure corners at the rooms of the National Academy of Design.
+In short, Patching is the subject of a conspiracy in which the Hanging
+Committee is implicated. But though professional envy may place his
+works in the worst possible light, and for some time cast a shadow over
+his prospects, an independent public taste will ultimately appreciate
+his genius. Mark the melancholy that overspreads his features, as he
+tastes that glass of sherry. Next to TRUTH, melancholy is the chief
+characteristic of his style. In a miniature portrait which he painted of
+me, last year, and which is regarded as a capital likeness, he
+introduced a shade of sadness, which is, at least, not habitual
+with me."
+
+Mr. Overtop hastened to say, that of _that_ fact he needed no assurance.
+
+"Without giving a minute account of all my guests, I may say generally,
+that they include novelists, dramatists, actors, and musicians. Some
+you may know by sight. The acquaintance of all you may make at a
+future time."
+
+At this strong hint, Mr. Overtop replied, that he should be only too
+happy. He had by this time come to the conclusion that there never was a
+more candid and delightful widow than Mrs. Slapman; and, furthermore,
+that she was that rarity--a sensible woman--of which he had been so long
+in search. Mr. Overtop mentally hugged himself.
+
+"By the way, sir--you will pardon the impertinence of the question--but
+to what profession do you belong?"
+
+"I am a lawyer, madam," said he, fearful that the announcement would not
+be well received. "Fayette Overtop, firm of Overtop & Maltboy."
+
+Mrs. Slapman mused a moment, and said:
+
+"It is a little singular, that, among my large collection--I mean
+circle--of friends, there shouldn't be a single lawyer."
+
+"As I am a _single_ lawyer, Mrs. Slapman, it is within my power to
+supply that deficiency among those who are honored with your
+friendship." Mr. Overtop thought, with some reason, as he finished this
+remark, that he had never said a better thing in his life.
+
+Mrs. Slapman's severe taste rejected Overtop's pun, but not himself, and
+she was about to say that she should put him on the list for her next
+_conversazione_, when another awkward interruption occurred, in
+this wise:
+
+Signor Mancussi was a gentleman with an Italian name and a perfect
+knowledge of English, who sang bass parts in a church up town, and
+enjoyed the reputation of having personated the chief Druid in Norma, at
+an early period of the New York opera. M. Bartin played one of numerous
+violins at the Academy of Music, and was believed to be kept down only
+by a powerful combination. Three months before this New Year's day, both
+of these gentlemen had volunteered their services, in company with many
+other musical people, to give a grand concert in aid of a benevolent
+enterprise. To M. Bartin, as a man supposed to know something of sharp
+management, from his connection with the opera, was intrusted the
+supreme control of the whole affair. It is due to M. Bartin to say, that
+he tried to perform his laborious duties faithfully and with perfect
+justice to his associates.
+
+When, therefore, in ordering the printing of the gigantic posters which
+heralded the concert, he directed his own name to be placed at the head
+of the "eminent artists who had offered their services for the
+occasion," and in type half as large again as any of the rest, he only
+expressed a conscientious opinion of his superiority over all of them.
+In this opinion his associates happened to disagree with him, each one
+claiming that himself, and nobody else, was entitled to typographical
+precedence.
+
+Most keenly was the alleged injustice felt by Signer Mancussi, who stood
+at the foot of the sloping list in letters less than an inch long; and
+he had made a solemn vow to revenge himself on M. Bartin the first time
+that they met after the concert. Their simultaneous appearance at Mrs.
+Slapman's was that time. M. Bartin had been privately informed of the
+Signer's intentions, and regretted that that gentleman's ridiculous
+vanity should get the better of his judgment. Seeing him at Mrs.
+Slapman's, M. Bartin avoided the Signer's presence, fearing they might
+come into a collision disgraceful to the time and the place. The Signer,
+for the same considerate reasons, kept shy of M. Bartin. After dodging
+each other for a long time, they were at last brought, by accident, face
+to face. M. Bartin was calm. Signor Mancussi tried to be tranquil, but
+those small, lean black letters at the foot of the list rose vividly to
+his mind; and, before he could check himself, he had whispered, or
+hissed, between his set teeth, the word,
+
+"SCOUNDREL!"
+
+M. Bartin was taken unawares, but had sufficient presence of mind to
+reply, "You're another," in a whisper, low, but freighted with meaning.
+
+Whereupon the Signor responded, also under his breath, "You're no
+gentleman." To this assertion, M. Bartin answered, with masterly irony,
+"And you _are_ a gentleman, now, a'n't you?"
+
+Up to this point the controversy had been pleasantly conducted in
+whispers, and was unnoticed by the bystanders; but M. Bartin's last
+insinuation had the strange effect of maddening the Signor still more.
+He lost his self-control, and said, in an audible voice:
+
+"You're only a scraper of catgut, anyhow."
+
+M. Bartin, also oblivious of the proprieties, retorted, louder still:
+
+"And what are you but an infernal screech owl?"
+
+Cries of "Hallo!" "What's the row?" "Hush!" and "For shame!" rose from
+all parts of the room, and the two musical gentlemen, conscious that
+they had grossly misconducted themselves, stepped back a yard from each
+other, and were immediately surrounded by several friends, and kindly
+told that they were a pair of fools.
+
+Mrs. Slapman and Overtop rushed to the spot. The latter measured the two
+combatants with his eye, to see if he could safely undertake to pitch
+both, or either of them, out of the room, if requested so to do by the
+widow, and concluded that he could not.
+
+Mrs. Slapman was much embarrassed by this painful outbreak. It was only
+three weeks ago that M. Bartin had dedicated a new quadrille to her; and
+but a fortnight since Signor Mancussi had sung four operatic airs
+gratuitously at one of her musical and dramatic _soirees_. But respect
+for herself and for her guests--especially for Mr. Overtop, of whose
+talents she had formed an exalted opinion--pointed out her path of duty,
+and she followed it. She stepped between the two disputants, and cast a
+look of surprise and regret at each.
+
+"I was hasty," said Signor Mancussi.
+
+"And I was too impulsive," said M. Bartin.
+
+"Then, gentlemen, if you would merit my continued friendship, please
+make up your little difference, by shaking hands."
+
+They recoiled from the proposition a moment, but, being pushed together
+by their respective friends from behind, took each other's right hand,
+shook it once feebly, and said distinctly, with their eyes, "We shall
+meet again!"
+
+"Very well done," said Mrs. Slapman, with the air of an empress,
+tempered by a charming smile. "And let us hope that is the end of it.
+Now, Mr. Overtop, allow me to offer you some refreshment."
+
+Mrs. Slapman was in the act of handing a glass of champagne to the
+favored Overtop, when an unearthly shriek was heard, which startled the
+steadiest nerves. This shriek was repeated three times in quick
+succession, and seemed to come from the sidewalk in front of the house.
+There was a general rush to the window; but Wilkeson, Overtop, Maltboy,
+and Quigg ran for the street at once, surmising the source of the cry.
+
+There stood Captain Tonkins, in the sleigh, leaning against the
+dashboard, holding in one hand an empty jug, and in the other his whip.
+Around the sleigh were a dozen men and boys, who had been convoked by
+the cry of "FELL' CITIZENS!" More men and more boys were seen coming in
+the distance.
+
+As the four lessees of the sleigh approached him, the Captain again
+yelled, "FELL' CITIZENS!"
+
+"For heaven's sake, stop, Captain!" cried Quigg.
+
+A smile of contempt played upon the Captain's large lips, as, shaking
+his whip defiantly at the agitated group, he shouted:
+
+"I--I know ye. Don' think I doknowye. You're Mulcahy men, ev' moth's
+sonofye; and you've come to this 'ere meet'n' to put down free-ee-dom of
+speech. But yer carndoit. 'Peat it, yer ca-arn-doit. I d'fy ye. I
+d'fy ye."
+
+The Captain was a powerful man; and Quigg, as well as his companions,
+singly and collectively, shrank from trying physical persuasion on him.
+Besides, a crowd of people had gathered, who were greatly enjoying the
+scene, and desiring its continuance for an indefinite period.
+
+"FELL' CITIZENS!" continued the Captain, "now these vile tools o'
+Mulca-a-hy silenced, warntellye I'm can'date School 'Spector in this
+ward. Fuss place, I'm only reg'l can'date. Secun' place, I feel great
+int'st mor'l wants of all your chi-i-ld'n, Masay they are my own
+child'n, Go'bless'em. Third place, my dear FELL' CIT'Z'NS, if yer'll
+jess step in ter Phil Rooney's 'fore ye vote, yer'll find some whi-i-sky
+there; and that--that's bess arg'ment, after all."
+
+Having reached the logical end of the first and last speech ever made in
+public by Captain Tonkins, the Captain tumbled out of his sleigh, and
+sprawled upon the snow; whereat the bystanders shouted for joy, and the
+widow Slapman and two large windows full of guests shook with laughter.
+
+"'S pla-at-form fall'n'?" asked the Captain.
+
+"Yes," replied one of the citizens, humoring the idea; "the platform
+gave way, and you tumbled to the ground."
+
+"I--I'no' who di't," resumed the Captain. "Them Mulca'men. They saw-awed
+posts." Here the Captain descried two widow Slapmans smiling on him from
+a window, and gallantly kissed his hand at them.
+
+His heavy body was tumbled into the rear of the sleigh, a buffalo robe
+thrown over it, and Captain Tonkins was then unconsciously borne toward
+the bosom of his family, in Minetta lane (a friend officiating as
+driver), amid the cheers of his late audience.
+
+The three bachelors were satiated with their day's experiences. They
+raised their hats to Mrs. Slapman, still laughing at the window, and
+walked smartly home. Mr. Quigg, deriving much comfort from the thought
+that Captain Tonkins had not been paid for his sleigh, and would not be,
+hastened to a neighboring stable, hired the only remaining team, and
+continued his round of calls, giving one minute to each.
+
+
+
+BOOK SECOND.
+
+POLISHING.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE ENIGMA.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson's new acquaintance throve rapidly. Mr. Minford's
+dealings with the world had made him shy and suspicious, and he was at
+first disposed to keep his benevolent visitor at a safe business
+distance. But the heart of the thoughtful mechanic could not long resist
+the kind and earnest sympathy of the man who sought to be his friend.
+
+With a caution born of experience, however, Mr. Minford, before
+admitting the new guest to his full confidence, called upon a number of
+Wall street brokers and South street merchants, to whom Marcus had
+referred him, and learned from them that that gentleman bore a
+reputation of the rarest honor and purity of character. While giving
+this united testimony, however, they all agreed in condemning Mr.
+Wilkeson's eccentricity--insanity, one broker called it--in retiring
+from business at the very moment when he was most successful, and had a
+great fortune within easy reach. The fact that he had retired with one
+hundred and fifty thousand dollars, instead of mitigating his offence in
+the eyes of those critics, increased it. "Why," said a noted bear, "with
+that amount of capital, and Wilkeson's first-rate talents--when he chose
+to use them--he might have become the king of Wall street. It's a pity
+so smart a fellow should make a wreck of himself." And the bear heaved a
+sigh of commiseration; which was by no means echoed by Mr. Minford, who
+gathered, from all this evidence, an increased esteem for his
+benefactor.
+
+From the time when he first crossed the threshold of the house on his
+mission of mercy, Pet had looked upon him with the deepest reverence.
+She had read, in story books, of mysterious gentlemen who went about
+doing good merely for the pleasure of it, and who always reached the
+scene of distress with fairy-like certainty, when everybody and
+everything would have gone to ruin without them. Such a strange,
+supernatural embodiment of goodness seemed Marcus Wilkeson to her
+childish fancy. When he entered the room--and he was an every-day caller
+now--she looked around with great anxiety to see that all the chairs
+were in their proper places; that there was no dirt or dust visible
+anywhere; that everything was in a state of order and cleanliness worthy
+so exalted a guest.
+
+She would run to take his overcoat and hat and cane, and place them as
+carefully in the clothes press as if they had been the robe, crown, and
+sceptre of a king. Then she would sit in her little chair, and take her
+sewing, or knitting, or embroidery, and pretend to be all absorbed in
+it, while she was listening eagerly to every word that Marcus addressed
+to her father, and occasionally looked up at the face of their guest,
+and thought how noble it was, and how proud she should be to call
+him uncle.
+
+When he spoke to her, as he often did, and asked her about her work, or
+her companions, or her studies (upon the latter subject he had grown
+quite curious, of late), she would feel that she was blushing, and
+answer, with downcast eyes, and be half glad and half sorry when he
+ceased to question her, and would then sit and torment herself by
+recalling what she had said, and thinking how much it might have
+been improved.
+
+A sharp-eyed observer, had such been present, accustomed to studying
+the human face and weighing motives, would have been puzzled to guess
+the exact nature of the feelings which Marcus entertained for the
+pretty, innocent young creature who sat there, always plying her little
+fingers at some useful work. The puzzle would have been a still greater
+one for Mr. Wilkeson himself. He felt a profound interest in Pet; and
+she it was, and not the pale mechanic or his novel machine, that led him
+daily up those three flights of rickety stairs to that humble room. He
+said to himself, and he would have said to anybody who was entitled to
+call upon him for an explanation, that he had always loved children, and
+that the beauty and goodness of this child had deeply interested him. If
+there was any other motive at the bottom of his heart, he studiously
+concealed it from himself, as he would have concealed it from all
+the world.
+
+During these visits, Mr. Minford pursued his work without interruption.
+The screens, which were at first jealously closed, were now thrown open,
+and the inventor sat there in full sight of his visitor, laboring at his
+great mechanical problem. Repeatedly he had begged of Marcus the
+privilege of explaining to him the principles of the machine; but that
+gentleman had always resolutely declined, for the reasons before stated.
+And he had always observed that, a few moments after such refusal, the
+face of the inventor would brighten up, as if with joy that he had not
+parted with his secret even to one who held a fifth interest in it.
+
+Of the wonderful results which the machine was sure to accomplish, Mr.
+Minford was never tired of talking, nor Mr. Wilkeson of hearing,
+although, at these times, his eyes followed the flying motions of Pet's
+fingers, as if they were a part of the wonder of which the inventor
+discoursed so glowingly.
+
+Precisely what the machine was to effect, when completed, Marcus
+Wilkeson would never have known, if he had been the most attentive of
+listeners. Mr. Minford spoke in vague, general terms, that afforded no
+clue to the mystery. He talked of old philosophers and mechanicians, who
+had failed to discover an unnamed secret of Nature, because they had no
+faith in its existence. Complete faith in the existence of the thing to
+be discovered, as well as in the ability of the searcher to find it, he
+regarded as indispensable conditions of an inventor's success.
+
+The fact that the natural law which he was trying to demonstrate had
+been pronounced an impossibility by professors of science, should weigh
+as nothing in the mind of any man who remembered how every great
+invention of the age had in turn been stamped "impossible" by those
+dogmatizers in their academical chairs, their books, and their reviews.
+Latterly (Mr. Minford confessed), the scientific theorists had been more
+tolerant toward other people's inventions (they never invent anything
+themselves); but with regard to the one upon which he was now engaged,
+they had, with complete unanimity, decided that the thing could not be
+done, and charitably called every man an idiot or a lunatic who
+attempted to do it.
+
+"The world has at last fallen into this belief," Mr. Minford would say,
+bitterly, "and the few people with whom I am acquainted would all agree
+in echoing these scientific opinions, if they knew what I am working at.
+But no one shall know--excepting you, Mr. Wilkeson, to whom I should be
+most happy to explain everything, if you would only let me. This
+prejudice is too deep rooted to be readily pulled up. Even when my
+invention is perfected, and has entered upon its boundless career of
+usefulness, I know that it will be called a humbug; that people will
+look at it, and see it in operation, and still say it is a lie. Yet the
+time will come when the professors of science will feel proud to
+expound, by formulas, the very invention which they have shown, by
+formulas, to be an absolute contradiction of all the laws of Nature. As
+for the rabble who make up the world (the inventor's lips curled as he
+said this), they will be glad to atone for the mad hue-and-cry with
+which they will follow me at first, by giving me, at last, limitless
+wealth and immortal fame."
+
+Mr. Minford's eyes flashed; and Marcus Wilkeson, looking up at them from
+Pet's volant fingers, saw in their sudden glare what he took to be the
+evidence of genius; but what, in an ordinary man, he would have called a
+decided symptom of insanity.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+A DELICATE PROPOSITION.
+
+One afternoon--when Mr. Minford was in excellent humor, having made a
+great discovery in the course of his experiments the previous
+night--Marcus thought it a good opportunity to propose something that
+had been on his mind for a week past.
+
+"Mr. Minford," he said, "will you excuse me for meddling a little in
+your household affairs?"
+
+"Not if you offer me any more kindness," returned the inventor, smiling
+gratefully at his guest. "I am too much in your debt already."
+
+"But you forget that I hold an interest in your invention, which you
+would make me take. I consider that more than payment in full."
+
+"So you have confidence in my success?"
+
+"You have begun to inspire me with it, I confess," replied Marcus,
+indulging in a little unavoidable flattery. "But--but it was not to
+_you_ that I was about to offer any kindness," he continued, emphasizing
+the personal pronoun, and looking hard at Pet, who bent patiently over
+her work, and began to blush in anticipation that her name would be
+mentioned, Mr. Minford raised his eyes from a ratchet which he was
+finishing in a vice, and glanced with curiosity at the speaker.
+
+"Do you not think, sir, that your daughter might profitably spare a few
+hours every day toward the completion of her education? You have told
+me that her studies were interrupted by a change in your circumstances,
+some years ago."
+
+"Certainly she might," answered the inventor, "and I thank you for the
+suggestion. This machine has so completely engaged my thoughts, that I
+had quite lost sight of the dear girl's education. I should say,
+however, that I have been expecting at any moment to put the finishing
+touch on my invention, the very first profits of which I shall spend in
+employing a dozen teachers, if need be, for my little Pet. She shall be
+an educated lady, if money can make her so. Sha'n't you, Pet?"
+
+The young girl's fingers twinkled faster at her work. "I hope so,
+father," said she.
+
+"But, Mr. Minford, it is possible--barely possible, you know--that your
+invention may not be completed, nor money be realized from it, for many
+months; perhaps one or two years. Suppose--only suppose, of course--your
+triumph to be postponed for even one year; your daughter will then be
+one year older, and less fitted to acquire the accomplishments which you
+desire her to possess, than she now is. Pardon the suggestion, if it is
+an obtrusive one. I plead the sincere interest which I take in you and
+her as my only excuse."
+
+"No apology is needed, my dear sir," replied the inventor "I know and
+appreciate your thoughtful kindness toward us; and I consider your
+advice most excellent, especially as I intend to travel in Europe, and
+take out patents for my invention there. It would be desirable to have
+my Pet learn French, and also to improve her knowledge of music. You
+understand the English branches pretty well, I believe, my dear. Let me
+see--how long is it since you left school?"
+
+"Three years, pa."
+
+"True! true!" said the inventor, sadly. "It was when our troubles first
+began, and I found it necessary to economize. But I did very wrong to
+take you from school at that time."
+
+"You forget, pa," replied his daughter, in a sweet, chiding voice. "You
+wanted me to go on with my studies, but I said that you must save the
+tuition money, and let me learn to keep house. Don't you remember, pa?"
+
+"Yes, child; I remember. And I was selfish enough to allow you to make
+the sacrifice. But you shall have schooling to your heart's content now,
+whether you will or not. I agree with our dear friend, that no time
+should be lost in resuming your education. I shall insist upon setting
+apart two hundred dollars for that purpose. Enough money will still be
+left to perfect my invention; and that, too, within a month,
+notwithstanding" (he added, playfully) "Mr. Wilkeson's discouraging
+remarks a moment ago."
+
+"And I shall insist upon not taking the money, pa," said Pet, laughing,
+but shaking her head, and patting her feet on the floor in the most
+decisive manner.
+
+"And I shall insist on furnishing the money," said Marcus Wilkeson,
+folding his arms, and looking very much in earnest. "Let us see who can
+be obstinate the longest."
+
+"Then _I_ shall insist on your taking another fifth interest in the
+invention. Upon that point I am immovable." Mr. Minford folded his arms
+likewise, to imply that nothing could shake his granitic determination.
+
+"Ah, now I see some prospect of a friendly arrangement. I will pay five
+hundred dollars for another fifth, and esteem it a good bargain,
+provided your daughter consents to let one half of it be spent on her
+education. What do you say to that, Pet?"
+
+"That I thank you very much for your kind offer," said the young girl,
+whose eyes sparkled with gratitude; "but I must not accept it. Pa will
+need all the money he can get to finish his work. I know it."
+
+Marcus and the father exchanged pleasant looks, and the former said,
+with an ill-assumed sternness:
+
+"Then I don't advance another cent to him. I have named my conditions,
+and they must be accepted. You have no idea, Pet, what a tremendously
+obstinate fellow I am when I'm roused."
+
+Nobody could have gathered the idea from his intensely amiable face at
+that moment.
+
+"I see, my dear, that we must yield to this determined man," said Mr.
+Minford, winking at Marcus. "We shall never have any peace with him
+until we do."
+
+"You know best, pa," returned his daughter, who shrank timidly from any
+further discussion with their guest.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson was delighted with the perfect confidence which father
+and child reposed in him. "Now that this little matter is happily
+settled," said he, "I must tell you that I have already taken the
+liberty of selecting a school for her."
+
+"How can we ever repay your goodness?" said Mr. Minford.
+
+"It is situated only two blocks away," pursued Marcus.
+
+"Capital!" cried Mr. Minford; "for then she will never be far from
+home."
+
+"And if you want me at any time, pa, you can send for me, and I can be
+here in a moment," said Pet. "It will be so delightful!"
+
+"It is a private school, and, if your daughter prefers, she can be
+taught separately from the other pupils. Miss Pillbody, the teacher,
+tells me that she can give her an hour and a half in the morning, before
+ten o'clock, and half an hour in the afternoon, after four o'clock."
+
+"That will suit me exactly, pa," cried Pet, clapping her hands with
+glee; "because then I can get your breakfast, dinner, and supper, and do
+all the housework, without any interruption in my studies."
+
+"Miss Pillbody thought the arrangement would suit you. She is a
+perfectly competent teacher of French, Italian, the English branches,
+music, drawing, the dead languages, and higher mathematics--quite a
+prodigy, I assure you, for a lady not yet twenty-two years old." (Marcus
+was addressing the father.) "I have been particular in my inquiries, and
+all who know her speak in the highest terms of her remarkable
+attainments, her ability to teach others, and her goodness of heart.
+Your daughter will like her, without doubt."
+
+"I know I shall," said Pet, with enthusiasm. "There are so many things
+that I will learn, pa. First, music--"
+
+"She has a fine piano, and plays splendidly," remarked the guest. "I
+heard her."
+
+"And French and Italian, to please you, pa--that is, if I can learn
+them--and everything else that the lady will teach me. I shall be so
+happy, sir."
+
+The father and the guest smiled at the zeal with which this young
+beginner proposed to grapple with the difficulties of human knowledge.
+It was fortunate for her that a long series of hard and injudicious
+teachers had not already sickened her of learning, and that she brought
+a fresh and uncorrupted taste to the work.
+
+Pet was thinking which one of her two dresses (equally faded) she should
+wear to school, and what bit of ribbon or trimming she could introduce
+in her old bonnet, to improve its general effect. Marcus Wilkeson was
+marvelling at the confidence which the inventor and his daughter placed
+in him, and at what there was about him to inspire it. Mr. Minford was
+congratulating himself on having met with a man so generous and sincere
+as this Mr. Wilkeson, and so entirely disinterested, too: "For,"
+reasoned the inventor, "he cannot appreciate, as I do, the enormous
+value of my discovery, and does not dream that his portion of it will
+compensate him for his outlay more than a hundred times over."
+
+The silence was broken by a sound as of heavy boots trying to move
+softly on the stairs, and a subsequent modest rap at the door.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+AN AUXILIARY OF MODERN CIVILIZATION.
+
+The boy Bog rapped, and entered. He was more neatly dressed than when
+Marcus saw him on the occasion of his first visit. His patched and
+threadbare coat was replaced by a neat roundabout jacket; his greasy,
+visorless cap, by a flat felt hat, of which the brim was symmetrically
+turned up; his tattered shoes by great cowhide boots. The boy was of
+that age when the human frame grows with vegetable-like rapidity; and he
+seemed to hare increased a little all around within three weeks.
+
+The boy looked distressingly awkward in his new articles of attire. Had
+he stolen them, he could not have appeared more guilty in presence of
+the rightful owner.
+
+"Why, Bog!" said Mr. Minford, reproachfully; "where have you been these
+three weeks? Not called to see us once!"
+
+The boy's confusion increased at this unexpected salutation, and he hung
+down his head at the threshold of the door. Mr. Minford partly reassured
+his bashful visitor, by springing forward, shaking him heartily by the
+hand, and saying, with earnestness, "My good lad, I am always glad to
+see you." Pet was also by his side in an instant, and warmly shaking the
+other hand. "You look real nice, Bog," said she. Mr. Wilkeson also came
+forward, and said, "Don't you remember me, Bog?" and clasped him by the
+right hand when the inventor had relinquished It.
+
+Bog bowed and scraped and blushed, and murmured "Thank you, very well,"
+several times, confusedly, and at last settled down into a chair which
+was pushed under him by Pet. Having crossed his legs, he began to feel a
+little more at ease.
+
+"You've been very busy of late, haven't you, Bog?" asked Pet, charitably
+anticipating an excuse for the boy's long absence.
+
+"You'd better believe it," replied Bog, not looking at her, but studying
+the pattern of his left boot. "The day after I called here last, Mr.
+Fink he got a job to stick up bills for a new hair dye, all the way from
+here to Dunkirk, on the Erie Railroad. Well, he couldn't go, cos he had
+lots o' city posting, ye see; so he hires me to do it for ten dollars a
+week and expenses. The pay was good, he said, because the work was
+extry hard. The bills was to be posted on new whitewashed fences, new
+houses, and places generally where there was signs up telling people not
+to 'post no bills.'"
+
+"That was a singular direction, Bog," said Mr. Minford.
+
+"So I told Mr. Fink," replied the boy; "but he said as how them were the
+hair-dye man's orders. He said the idea was to make folks look at bills
+who wouldn't notice 'em if they was on a place all covered over with
+adv'tisements. They was to be posted up high and strong, so that the
+owner of the property couldn't tear 'em down easy. Mr. Fink thought the
+idea was a good one; but he owned it was a little risky."
+
+"Perhaps that is why he didn't care to do it himself," suggested Marcus
+Wilkeson.
+
+"Mebbe," said Bog; "but I didn't consider it no objection. I told him I
+was goin' to be a bill poster, and wanted to study every branch o' the
+business." At this point Bog hitched his chair nervously, uncrossed and
+recrossed his legs, as if he were conscious of trespassing on the
+patience of his auditors, and then went on: "Well, I hurried home, and
+saw that aunt didn't want for nothin', and then I started on my travels.
+I should ha' called and seen you, Mr. Minford," he added, casting a side
+glance at the inventor, "but I hadn't time."
+
+"No excuse necessary, my good Bog," returned Mr. Minford, kindly.
+"Business before pleasure, you know. But I am anxious to hear how you
+got along with the job."
+
+"Well, pooty hard," said Bog, emphatically, "though I made out to go all
+through the State, and stick up six thousand bills, every one on 'em on
+a new house, shop, or fence. Lemme see--I was chased seven times by big
+dogs that was set on me, shot at three times"
+
+"Why, poor Bog!" interrupted Pet; "you wern't hurt, I hope?"
+
+"No, Miss Minford; I wasn't hurt," answered Bog, looking her in the face
+for the first time since he entered the house, "though I got one through
+my old cap."
+
+"I'm _so_ glad it was no worse, Bog."
+
+These words of sympathy from the young girl flustered the poor boy for a
+minute. Then he rallied:
+
+"Besides that, I was took up four times by the perlice, and was carried
+afore justices of the peace. When they asked what I had to say why I
+shouldn't be fined, I told 'em the whole truth about it, and they all
+laughed except one, and said it was really funny, and they hadn't no
+doubt the hair dye was a very good thing to take, but could tell better
+after they had tried some. I told 'em that the hair-dye man would send
+'em a dozen bottles apiece. Mr. Fink had d'rected me to say this, if I
+was 'rested and brought afore a justice. The justices--that is, all of
+'em but one--then said they didn't want to be hard on me; and as that
+was my first offence, they would let me go without any fine. And they
+did, after givin' me their names, and tellin' me to be sure to have the
+bottles sent on jest as soon as could be. Ye see, they were all as bald
+on the top o' their heads as punkins. But the fourth justice that I was
+took to, he wasn't bald, but had a crop o' hair like a picter; and when
+I offered to put down his name for a dozen bottles, he swore, and fined
+me five dollars for what he said was a insult to the dignity of justice,
+and five dollars for postin' up bills in places where it was agin the
+law. Mr. Fink had give me money from the hair-dye man to pay fines, as
+well as my board; so I didn't care. But--but I am talking too much."
+
+Bog paused, because, on taking a stealthy observation around him, he
+suddenly become conscious that his three auditors were listening
+attentively to his story.
+
+"Not at all, my dear Bog," said Mr. Minford. "I, for one, am curious to
+know how this ingenious plan of advertising, in defiance of the law,
+succeeded." Mr. Wilkeson expressed himself curious on the same point.
+Bog, thus encouraged, continued:
+
+"When I come home, after havin' stuck up six thousand bills in the
+principal towns and villages along the route, I went right to Mr. Fink.
+He shook hands with me, and ses he, 'Bog, your fortun's made.' 'How's
+that?' said I. 'Why, ses he, 'you're the greatest bill poster I ever
+heerd of. Professor Macfuddle" (that was the hair-dye man) "ses the
+money has begun to pour in to him like sixty, and he is buyin' up all
+the hair dye in the market, and puttin' his labils on it to supply the
+demand. He has given me ten dollars to present to you, besides the
+thirty for your wages.' Mr. Fink then give me forty dollars, and ses he,
+'That a'n't all; for I have so much business now, I want a pardner, and
+I'll take you, and give you one third of the earnin's.' I rather guess I
+snapped at the offer; and we is goin' into pardnership to-morrer."
+
+"Success to you," said Marcus and the inventor together. They saw, in
+this illustration of his bill-posting talents, only an evidence of
+business shrewdness that deserved encouragement. The young girl,
+however, viewed it in the light of a violation of law, and therefore
+could not conscientiously approve of it. Bog noticed her silence, and
+guessed the cause.
+
+"Thank you very much," said he; "but I forgot to say I a'n't goin' to do
+any more business on the Erie plan. It a'n't right. Come to think it
+over, I was sorry I done it; and so I told Mr. Fink; and he sed it
+wasn't exackly reg'lar either, and he shouldn't never ask me to do
+it agen."
+
+"I am glad of that," said Pet, quietly.
+
+Bog's eyes were instantly turned toward her with an expression of pride
+and gratitude.
+
+"Oh! of course, it is always best to obey the laws," observed Mr.
+Minford.
+
+"And I wouldn't for a moment be thought to advise anything else," added
+Marcus Wilkeson; "though I never could help admiring pluck and sharpness
+in business affairs."
+
+"I am going to school again, Bog," said the young girl, hastening to
+change the subject of conversation.
+
+Bog looked up, surprised and pleased.
+
+"Mr. Wilkeson," said Mr. Minford, "has taken another small share in my
+invention, and pays me in advance for it. With that, Pet will finish her
+education." The inventor would have made this disclosure of his private
+affairs to no other human being but Bog; for this simple boy was the
+only person he had ever known (excepting Marcus Wilkeson) who had not
+openly ridiculed his mysterious labors.
+
+"I am very glad to hear of it, sir," said Bog, awkwardly, but with an
+air of profound respect. "How--how is the _ma_sheen, sir?" Bog asked the
+question hurriedly, as if the machine were a sick person, whose health
+he had until then forgotten to inquire after.
+
+"Getting on finely, Bog. Only two or three springs, a cog here, a
+ratchet here, a band at this point, and a lever up there (Mr. Minford
+touched portions of the machine rapidly), and then look out for
+a noise!"
+
+"A noise!" repeated Bog, with juvenile earnestness.
+
+"Not an explosion, my good fellow, but tremendous public
+excitement--plenty of fame, mixed with a good deal of abuse at first,
+and a _little_ money, I hope." The inventor's eyes flashed with the fire
+that Bog had often seen; and when he emphasized the word "little," Bog
+knew that he meant to express the boundlessness of the wealth that his
+labors would bring to him.
+
+"I believe it," said Bog, with sincerity pictured in every lineament of
+his honest face. "I've always believed it."
+
+"So you have, my dear Bog; and your faith has often cheered me," replied
+the inventor, patronizingly. "By the way, how's your aunt?"
+
+"Oh, yes; how _is_ your aunt, Bog?" asked Pet. "I had quite forgotten
+her."
+
+"She's pooty well, ony them rheumatics troubles her some. They're
+workin' their way from her left arm into her head, aunt says. Week afore
+last they was in her feet, and they've ben clear round her and goin'
+back agen since then. Queer things, them rheumatics!"
+
+"They are very painful, Bog, you know," said Pet.
+
+"Yes; so aunt says." Bog did not add, as he might have truly done, "A
+thousand times a day."
+
+"Give her my kind regards, Bog, and say I will call and see her,"
+continued Pet.
+
+"My respectful regards also," added Mr. Minford.
+
+"Thank you," said the boy; "but I guess you better not call, Miss
+Minford. Aunt's a good woman, but kind o' cur'us, you know. Them
+rheumatics has made a great change in her." Bog here referred, but made
+no verbal allusion, to a certain friendly call which Pet had once made
+upon his aunt, on which occasion that elderly lady had entertained her
+visitor with a monologue two hours long, giving her a complete history
+of the malady, from its birth in the right great toe, three years
+previous, through all its eccentric phenomena, to that stage of the
+disease which made it, as the venerable sufferer observed with, some
+pride, the "very wust case the doctors ever heerd of."
+
+Upon this fruitful theme, Bog's aunt could and would have discoursed for
+hours longer, but for the appearance of Bog, when she sought a new
+relief from her agonies by abusing that poor fellow, charging him with
+neglect and ingratitude, finding fault with the food which he brought
+home for her from market, and asking him when he was going to buy that
+soft armchair he had promised her so long. Bog laughed, and explained
+this outburst, by saying to Pet, "It's only aunt's rheumatics;" but the
+old lady rejected the explanation, and went on scolding and faultfinding
+with such increased fierceness, that Pet hastily put on her bonnet and
+shawl, and bade the rheumatic grumbler "good-by," saying (which was
+true) that her father would be anxious about her. Since then, the young
+girl had kept away from Bog's aunt.
+
+"I've bought her a nice, soft armchair lately," continued Bog; "but it
+don't do her no good. The rheumatics seem to be getting wusser all the
+time; and the thing that makes them wussest of all is calls. So I guess
+it's better for aunt you should keep away, Miss Minford." Bog prided
+himself on his tact in putting forth the last argument.
+
+Then the conversation turned on Pet's education; Marcus and her father
+fondly discussing what it ought to be, and Bog listening, and looking
+stealthily at the young girl, still busy at her work; and they all sat,
+happy in thoughts of the future, far into the twilight.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+MISS PILLBODY.
+
+Miss Pillbody's school was unknown to the pages of the City Directory.
+It was never advertised in the newspapers, with a long list of "Hons."
+and bank presidents as unimpeachable references. The bright little plate
+on her door exhibited only "Pillbody," in neat script, and no hint of
+the existence of a school within. The school was select to such an
+extent, that not more than a dozen pupils were admitted to its
+privileges; and so private, that, outside of that number, its name was
+not known except among its graduates; and there were reasons why they
+should hesitate to spread its reputation abroad. If strictly classified
+among the institutions of the city, it might be termed, "A school for
+female adults in good circumstances, whose early education had been
+neglected."
+
+The idea of this school originated with Miss Pillbody; and, like many
+other valuable ideas, it was hit upon quite accidentally.
+
+Dorcas Pillbody was the only daughter of a man who had amassed a fortune
+in the oyster business, and had finally retired to a four-story house in
+Sixteenth street, near the Sixth Avenue, where he purposed to spend the
+balance of his days in the dignified enjoyment of his hard-earned money.
+To this secluded oyster dealer, as solitary and happy in the midst of
+his new grandeur as a bivalve in its native bed, came a plausible
+stockbroker, who, after a series of interviews, persuaded Mr. Pillbody
+to make a small investment in the "Sky Blue Ridge Pure Vein Copper
+Mining Company."
+
+The small investment unfortunately turned out well. In less than sixty
+days, the shares that he had bought at ten per cent, sold at
+seventy-five, and ultimately advanced to par. Delighted with this
+unexpected result, Mr. Pillbody determined to stake largely (he had been
+a wholesale oyster dealer, and was a man of comprehensive ideas). Again
+his venture prospered. Mr. Pillbody, intoxicated with success, invested
+his entire means in the purchase of two new mines in a Southern State,
+whose unparalleled richness was certified to by mineralogists of great
+reputation.
+
+Just as Mr. Pillbody was making arrangements to bring these mines before
+the public, his stockbroking friend, through whom he had effected the
+purchase, left for Europe, and it was then discovered that Mr.
+Pillbody's mines, if they existed at all, were ten feet under a swamp,
+on property which belonged to somebody else, the title deeds of which
+had been forged by the adroit operator. Mr. Pillbody could not endure
+his misfortune. He wrote notes bidding farewell to his wife and child,
+and commending them to the care of their relatives, to whom he had
+always been bountifully generous. Then he went to Staten Island by
+ferry, there took a row boat, proceeded to a celebrated oyster bed which
+was the scene of his youthful labors, and drowned himself.
+
+The widow and daughter (the latter twenty years of age, healthy, and
+finely educated) applied to the two brothers of the deceased for
+assistance, and were at once kindly received into their families, and
+sat upon sofas and ate from tables purchased with money (never repaid)
+of the late Mr. Pillbody. The two brothers, upon application to the
+proper tribunal, were appointed executors of the estate, and were not
+long in discovering that it was insolvent. Mother and daughter were
+shifted about with almost monthly regularity from one house to the
+other; and, though they tried to make themselves useful in every
+capacity except that of a servant, they could not disguise the
+conviction that their departure was an event a great deal more welcome
+than their coming. The widow's talent for dressmaking (she had been a
+milliner's apprentice before marriage), though of a high order, and
+exerted to the utmost, failed to please. Miss Pillbody's thorough
+knowledge of French, and the higher branches of an elegant education, as
+well as her proficiency on the piano, and her sweet, simple style of
+ballad singing, were worse than useless acquirements in her
+uncles' families.
+
+Her uncles were cold, stern, ignorant men, who had an intense hatred for
+the mere accomplishments of life. Each had two daughters, who, with the
+natural tastes of the sex, were not averse to the graces of education,
+in the abstract, but could not bear to see them displayed by their
+"stuck-up, pauper cousin," as they often termed that hapless young lady
+in private conversation. A kind offer, which she was imprudent enough,
+to make, to teach them all she knew, had set them against her from
+the first.
+
+The widow endured the cold looks and cutting words of her husband's
+relatives, and even the reproaches which they heaped upon his folly,
+with a widow's patience, and seemed content to remain a poor,
+broken-down, dependent creature. Miss Pillbody, on the contrary, was
+quick to discern and to resent, mentally, the uncivil treatment daily
+experienced by her mother and herself. Had she been alone in the world,
+she would have left those inhospitable roofs when the unkind hints first
+began to be dropped, and trusted to the cold charity of strangers; but
+she could not bear the thought of being separated from her mother. So
+she endured her wretched state of dependence as best she could, while
+she quietly sought for some means of employment that would yield them
+a living.
+
+Profiting by the lessons she had learned from her uncles, she did not
+apply to any person who had known her father and received favors from
+him in their better days. She asked no favor from any one--only work, at
+a fair price. By diligent hunting, she found several opportunities. She
+could earn four dollars a week by embroidering (at which she was
+skilful, and had taken premiums); or two dollars and a half for
+teaching French, twice a week, in a country seminary; or her board and
+washing for inducting a family of four little musical prodigies into all
+the mysteries of the piano. But these tempting offers would still have
+left her mother with her uncles, and she spurned them all.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+A FRIEND IN NEED.
+
+One day, as Miss Pillbody was riding up Broadway, in tending to visit a
+Teachers' Agency for the sixteenth time, she accidentally made the
+acquaintance of a middle-aged lady, who talked a great deal upon the
+slightest provocation, trifled sadly with grammar and pronunciation, and
+was excessively friendly and amiable. The diamonds in her ears and on
+her fingers, and her overdone and gaudy style of dressing, were some
+indication, though not a convincing one, that she was a woman of wealth;
+and Miss Pillbody made bold to ask her if she knew anybody who wanted a
+private teacher in her family.
+
+The lady said she did not, "unless," she added, laughing very loud at
+the humor of the suggestion, "you come into my family, and learn me
+something."
+
+The remark was unpremeditated, but, the moment it was made, the lady
+seemed to be greatly struck with its force, and immediately followed it
+up with the question, "Do you s'pose you could learn grammar and
+pronunciation, and how to talk French, to a grown-up woman like me?"
+Miss Pillbody thought the lady with the diamonds was joking, and laughed
+by way of reply. "But I am ra-ally in earnest," continued the lady,
+thoughtfully, turning three heavy cluster rings on her little left
+finger. "Ye see, my early eddication was rather poor, 'cos I was poor
+then; but my old man made a spec' in tobacco, last year, and now I'm
+pooty well off, and live in good s'ciety. I kinder feel the want of
+grammar, French, and a few o' them things. I like your face and your
+manners, and if you can learn me 'em, I'll give you ten dollars a week
+to come to my house one hour every day, and be my private
+schoolmistress. It'll be rather hard, I s'pose, to learn an old dog new
+tricks; but there is no harm a-tryin'."
+
+Notwithstanding the oddity of the proposition, Miss Pillbody saw by the
+lady's face that she meant what she said. "I think I understand English
+grammar, and French, and the other branches usually taught at
+academies," she replied, "and should be very happy to accept
+your offer."
+
+"Then consider the bargain closed," returned the lady. "Here is my
+'dress" (handing her a card), "and you may come to-morrer mornin', at
+ten o'clock, if that'll suit you. I have no children, and the old man
+will be out at that time, and we shall be as snug as two bugs in a
+rug, ye see."
+
+Miss Pillbody was delighted with the sudden prospect of an honest living
+thus opened to her, and she only feared that she would not be able to do
+enough for her money. So, after she had again thanked the lady for her
+kindness, she said:
+
+"I think I could give you lessons on the piano, madam--unless you
+understand that instrument better than I do."
+
+"Lor' bless me, child!" responded the lady, holding up her thick, red
+hands, and making the diamonds flash in the sunlight; "Lor' bless me!
+them fingers is too stiff to play the pianner now. I've got a splendid
+pianner, though, with an oleon 'tachment, three pedals, and pearl
+keys--cost eight hundred dollar; and a nice piece of furniture it is,
+you may believe. I let it be out of tune all the time. That's an excuse
+for not playing when anybody asks me to, ye know. I don't mind tellin'
+you this, because you'll be sure to find it out." And the lady laughed
+very loudly at the confession of this small deceit, which Miss Pillbody
+assured her was by no means confined to herself, but had been adopted by
+her ingenious sex from time immemorial.
+
+When the middle-aged pupil and her young teacher separated, as they did
+on the arrival of the stage at an up-town jeweller's, where the former
+got out to make a few purchases, Miss Pillbody felt as if she had known
+her patroness for years, and that, in that coarse, showy, good-hearted
+woman, she had found a true friend.
+
+And so it turned out. However dull Mrs. Crull might be as a scholar, she
+was quick-witted as a friend, and was constantly bestowing unexpected
+kindnesses upon Miss Pillbody. Scarcely a day passed that the young
+teacher did not receive from her pupil some little present--at times
+rising to the value of a bonnet or a shawl. Mrs. Crull's all-embracing
+kindness would have extended to the widow Pillbody too (in whom she was
+much interested from the daughter's accounts of her), but for the shrewd
+objection which she entertained against intrusting any one with the
+secret of her pupilage. Miss Pillbody was often and particularly
+enjoined by her not to tell any one--- not even her mother--of it; and
+she saw the advantages of carefully observing the request. Great pains
+were taken to keep Mr. Crull, and the housemaid, cook, and coachman,
+from a knowledge of the mystery.
+
+On Miss Pillbody's arrival daily at ten A.M., she was ushered into the
+drawing room, where Mrs. Crull was always anxiously awaiting her. The
+servant was told to say to callers that "Mistress is out" (Mrs. Crull
+bolted at this trifling deception at first, but soon got used to it),
+and the lesson began.
+
+Mrs. Crull at first thought she was competent to learn her native tongue
+and French together, in a series of half-hour lessons; but she soon
+found out that the latter language had some eccentric peculiarities
+quite beyond her powers of articulation, and that the spelling of a word
+did not afford the slightest clue to the method of pronouncing it. After
+floundering about heroically but hopelessly through the introductory
+chapter of the first French grammar, she gave up the polite tongue in
+despair, consoling herself with the reflection, that speaking bad French
+was worse than speaking no French at all.
+
+Miss Pillbody, who did not venture to advise her pupil on her choice of
+studies, but left her to consult her own fancies undisturbed, heartily
+approved of Mrs. Crull's conclusion, though she acknowledged that New
+York society by no means took that view of the case, but tolerated bad
+French with a courtesy worthy of France itself.
+
+Mrs. Crull's studies were thereafter confined to English spelling,
+grammar, and writing. She declared that she knew enough of arithmetic to
+count change correctly, and wanted to know no more; and that geography
+was of no earthly use to her. Besides, she never could remember the
+names of places.
+
+It was in pronunciation that Miss Pillbody's system achieved the
+greatest good. Anxious to strengthen herself on that weak point, Mrs.
+Crull set a watch on her language, and gave every word a good look
+before she sent it forth. The effect of this constant introspection was
+most happy; but, at times, Mrs. Crull would be thrown off her guard by a
+rush of ideas, and all the old blunders would come out. Toward other
+persons, she became, to some extent, a free teacher, and would, in the
+most obliging manner, rectify their little errors of pronunciation, when
+she was sure of them, and sometimes when she was not.
+
+Of course, Mr. Crull was taken in training by her. That gentleman,
+having made the discovery, early in life, that the less a man says, the
+more he is supposed to know, had acquired a habit of taciturnity which
+had become a second nature to him. His conversation consisted mainly of
+grunts and nods; and it was astonishing how much he could express by
+them. At any rate, they had "made his fortin', and he couldn't ha' done
+more'n that if he'd talked like a house a-fire"--which explanation,
+often repeated, was about the longest one ever known to be uttered by
+Mr. Crull. Therefore Mr. Crull did not offer a large field for the
+exhibition of his wife's new acquirements; but, by drawing him into
+conversation, and then lying in wait for him, she found opportunities to
+exhibit them for his good.
+
+At first, Mr. Crull only stared and grunted. Then he laughed (his laugh
+and Mrs. Crull's laugh were very similar, and were their strongest bond
+of union). Once he said, "Wonder what's the matter with the ole woman?"
+And, on a subsequent occasion, when Mrs. Crull had convicted him of
+three mistakes in five words, he ventured upon this protracted remark:
+"Guess the ole gal feels rather big since she got inter wot they call
+good s'ciety, eh?" This was in allusion to the recent successful
+speculation in tobacco, which had enabled Mr. Crull to buy the best
+house in Twenty-third street, and take the second best pew in a
+fashionable church, thereby placing Mrs. Crull at once within the
+charmed circle of society.
+
+As for himself, Mr. Crull took very little interest in society, having
+observed that society had taken very little interest in him until that
+"lucky turn in terbacker." Mrs. Crull would smile, and confess that
+society had claims upon people, and that, when one is in Rome, one must
+do as the Romans do. The moral of which proverb was, that Mr. Crull
+ought to improve his speech. Mr. Crull replied, by asking "wot
+difference 'twould make a hunderd years from now?" Which observation,
+when Mr. Crull condescended to speak at such length, was a favorite
+argument with him. But he little suspected his wife's secret.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+BRANCHING OUT.
+
+To Miss Pillbody, this quiet little arrangement proved a fortune indeed.
+In two weeks after she became acquainted with her benefactress, she was
+rich enough to take lodgings for her mother and herself at a decent
+boarding house. The old lady entertained singular notions about the
+rights of relationship, and held that it was the duty of her husband's
+brothers to give them a home for the balance of their lives, and
+regarded her daughter's desire to cut loose from her uncles, and be
+independent, as a romantic and absurd notion, born of novel reading, to
+which Miss Pillbody was a good deal addicted.
+
+To gratify her daughter's whim, the widow Pillbody finally consented to
+move into a boarding house, though she did it in the firm belief that
+the good luck which the young lady had fallen upon would be of brief
+duration, and they would be glad to come back to their relatives
+again--their "natteral protectors," as Mrs. P. called them.
+
+In their new residence, Miss Pillbody was happy. The money which she
+earned weekly, and which was always paid to her in advance, was
+sufficient for her own and her mother's board. In addition to other
+presents, Mrs. Crull had forced small sums upon her acceptance, at
+different times; and Miss Pillbody began to enjoy the odd sensation of
+laying up money in a savings bank. Of the future she thought but little;
+first, because she had no head for plans; and second, because Mrs. Crull
+had promised to set her up in a private school; and Miss Pillbody placed
+a blind trust in that lady. An accident, in this wise, caused the
+fulfilment of the promise much sooner than was expected.
+
+Mr. Crull, in getting out of a stage, one day, slipped on the step, and
+dislocated his left shoulder. At his age, careful treatment was
+necessary for an injury of that kind; and the family doctor peremptorily
+forbade him to leave the house for a month. Mr. Crull therefore stayed
+at home, growling like a bear in a cage, and solacing himself with the
+determination to bring a suit for damages against the stage company, the
+carelessness of whose driver (in Mr. Crull's opinion) caused
+the accident.
+
+Mr. Crull, like a good husband, would have nobody to nurse him, apply
+his embrocations, and put on his bandages, but his wife; and Mrs. Crull,
+like a good wife, cheerfully and tenderly performed that duty. But this
+rendered necessary the abandonment of the daily lessons at her house;
+for she was liable to be summoned to her husband's bedside at any moment
+(he sent for her at every new twinge of pain); and, furthermore, it was
+his custom to crawl out of his couch every half hour, and wander
+restlessly through the house, until his wife, under the stern
+instructions of the family doctor, sent him back to bed again.
+
+Mrs. Crull, though not wanting in love for her disabled consort, was
+loth to abandon her lessons. Having tasted of the Pierian spring, she
+desired to drink deeply.
+
+As Miss Pillbody could not continue her course of instruction at Mrs.
+Crull's residence, without being detected in the act by the invalid lord
+of that mansion; and as it was clearly impracticable for Mrs. Crull to
+go to Miss Pillbody's boarding house, and turn the widow Pillbody out of
+the little room which mother and daughter jointly occupied, the generous
+pupil hit upon the idea of renting the ground floor of a house for her
+teacher, setting apart one room as a schoolroom, fitting it up for her
+in comfortable style, and helping her to get wealthy adult pupils enough
+to pay all the expenses of the establishment, and a handsome
+income besides.
+
+Miss Pillbody thankfully accepted the noble offer; though she feared
+that she would never obtain scholars enough to repay the money which
+Mrs. Crull was willing to advance, and also to defray the current
+expenses of housekeeping.
+
+Mrs. Crull entertained no such fears. She had great faith in the
+efficacy of advertising. She had personally known three quacks who made
+half a million apiece out of patent medicines; and one woman who had
+turned a common recipe for removing superfluous hair into an eligible
+establishment in Thirty-second street, and a country cottage, with
+sixteen acres under good cultivation. She believed that newspaper
+advertising was the shortest and surest road to fortune; and the only
+standing cause of quarrel between her and her husband was the latter's
+incredulous "Pooh! pooh!" at her theory upon this subject.
+
+At her request, Miss Pillbody drew up this advertisement, and caused it
+to be inserted twice in three daily papers:
+
+"To LADIES IN GOOD SOCIETY WHO DESIRE TO IMPROVE THEIR EDUCATION.--A
+young lady who has moved in wealthy and fashionable circles, and has
+received the best education that New York city could afford, having met
+with reverses in fortune, would be happy to accept, as private pupils, a
+few ladies whose early cultivation was, for any reason, neglected.
+French, Italian, Spanish, vocal music, the piano, and all the English
+rudiments, taught at reasonable prices. Particular attention paid to
+pronunciation, spelling, and writing. Satisfactory references given
+and required.
+
+"N.B.--Pupils taught separately, and at different hours.
+
+"For further information, address 'Educatrix, New York Post Office.'"
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+There were many points in this advertisement to which Miss Pillbody's
+modesty took exception; but Mrs. Crull insisted upon them in a way that
+permitted no refusal. The little bit of bragging was the principal
+thing, she said. She had always observed that people are inclined to
+believe bragging advertisements, though they openly profess that they
+can't be taken in by them. As for the satisfactory references, she would
+undertake to give them, if they were required--which, of course, they
+would not be, as the mere offering of them invariably sufficed. If
+called upon, she would say that she knew a wealthy lady, the head of a
+family, who had derived the greatest possible benefit from the
+instructions of "Educatrix." If asked who she was, she could answer,
+that "Educatrix" would on no account allow the name to be made known, as
+it was a great merit of her system that she kept the names of her pupils
+a profound secret from each other, and from the rest of the world. The
+good sense of this regulation would at once be appreciated by all mature
+ladies who wished to repair the defects of their early education. Her
+own position as the mistress of an elegant mansion in Twenty-third
+street, would (Mrs. Crull reasoned) entitle her statement to
+ready belief.
+
+The plan worked capitally. "Educatrix" received fifty answers to her
+advertisement, and was busy more than a week calling at the houses of
+those who desired an interview with her. The ladies were all in good
+circumstances, and, without an exception, were the wives of men who had
+made sudden fortunes, after the manner common in the United States.
+Finding themselves elevated above the necessity of cooking their own
+dinners and washing their own clothes, they keenly felt the want,
+hitherto unknown, of an education which would fit them, in a measure,
+for that society whose portals were now thrown wide open to them. Miss
+Pillbody's gentle manners and polished ways gained for her the
+confidence of all; and she could have had fifty pupils daily, at two
+dollars a lesson (the fixed price), of one hour each, if it had been
+possible to teach that number.
+
+Acting on the advice of Mrs. Crull, Miss Pillbody decided to accept only
+twelve pupils, for twenty-four lessons each, and devote six hours daily
+to them. This arrangement would give her six pupils a day; and the
+twelve would complete their course in about two months. Then she could
+take twelve more, and so on. It was plain, from the success of the first
+experiment, that there would never be a scarcity of pupils.
+
+Mrs. Crull then rented the first floor and basement of a suitable house
+in a quiet neighborhood, furnished it nicely, hired a grand piano for
+the front parlor, and turned over the premises and their contents to her
+young teacher. Miss Pillbody brought her mother to their new home, a
+fair share of which had been set apart and fitted up expressly for her.
+
+The old lady admitted, with some reluctance, that the house was not
+badly furnished, and that her daughter's prospects might be worse than
+they were. But who was this mysterious woman, that took such an interest
+in her daughter? What was her motive? she would like to know. And why
+was she so anxious to avoid her (Mrs. Pillbody)? To which questions her
+daughter responded, as she had done fifty times before, that her
+teaching was strictly private, and that none of her pupils would visit
+her, except under a pledge of the profoundest secrecy. Mrs. Pillbody
+shook her head doubtingly, and said, "We shall see," adding that she
+only hoped they would be as comfortable there as they were at Uncle
+John's and Daniel's, that was all.
+
+The school throve. The pupils came with great punctuality at their
+different hours, and were unknown to each other and to the world. The
+secret of the school would never have got abroad, but for the incaution
+of a certain Mrs. Brigback (wife of a man who had been connected with
+the City Government for two years on a nominal salary, and retired
+rich). She was so delighted at the progress which she made in the
+English rudiments, and in the French (being able to ask for bread, or
+fish, or concerning a person's health, in that language), that she could
+not refrain from confidentially advising another lady (the wife of a
+street contractor, suddenly opulent) to take a few lessons from the same
+accomplished teacher. The street contractor's wife was perfectly
+indifferent to society, and had no wish to remedy the defects of her
+early education. She promised secrecy, and the next day told the story,
+at the expense of her friend, to a mutual female acquaintance, who
+passed it on with embellishments to a third, who amused a fourth with
+its narration; and so it went through a succession of confidential
+people, until, one day, it became the subject of conversation in a stage
+in which Marcus Wilkeson was riding. He could not avoid hearing it; and,
+although the two ladies (themselves shockingly astray in their grammar)
+laughed at the absurdity of the thing, Marcus Wilkeson thought it was a
+capital idea. A plan which he had been idly revolving in his mind for
+the education of Miss Minford, began to take shape. The inventor (he
+reasoned) would not be likely to object to a strictly private school for
+his daughter, if the teacher were a lady of correct principles, and
+highly educated.
+
+Upon the last point, Marcus Wilkeson determined to satisfy himself. So
+he addressed a note, through the General Post Office, to "Miss Pillbody,
+New York City," requesting the privilege of an interview on business, at
+the residence of the lady, the exact location of which she was asked to
+designate.
+
+The letter was advertised (Miss Pillbody's address being unknown to the
+carrier), and, about two weeks after it was written, an answer came back
+to Mr. Wilkeson, at his house, giving information as to the whereabouts
+of the lady, and appointing the time for an interview.
+
+Mr. Wilkeson called, and in five minutes' conversation was satisfied of
+Miss Pillbody's moral and intellectual qualifications as teacher, and
+thought himself very fortunate in securing a vacancy among the pupils
+(caused by sudden illness) for Miss Minford. With what perfect
+confidence the suspicious inventor, as well as his simple-hearted
+daughter, accepted the frank offer of their friend and benefactor, we
+have already seen.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+THE LITTLE PUPIL.
+
+It was a pleasant winter's morning, when Mr. Minford and his daughter,
+and their singular friend, made a formal call on Miss Pillbody, by
+appointment. The inventor had overcome a difficulty in his machine, by
+introducing a cam movement, and was in excellent humor. As he walked
+along the streets, he said that the snow and the sky and his future all
+looked bright to him now. Of the two former objects his assertion was
+obviously true, and Pet enjoyed the shining scene, as youth, health, and
+innocence always do, without reference to the future.
+
+A few minutes' walk brought them to Miss Pillbody's private schoolhouse.
+A pull at the bell summoned a stout, red-faced servant girl to the door.
+To the question, if Miss Pillbody was in, she said, "Yaas, sir, ef yer
+plaze" (Miss P. had vainly endeavored to correct her English), and
+ushered her visitors into the reception parlor, or schoolroom.
+
+A pleasant place it was, and nicely warmed with a smouldering coal
+fire, the coziness and comfort of which, were fitly reflected from the
+red carpet, and red curtains, and red plush covered furniture. The grand
+piano, hired for use, gave the room that completely furnished appearance
+that nothing but a piano can give. A book of instruction, open at a
+passage which strongly resembled a rail fence through a rolling country,
+showed that inexperienced hands had recently been pounding the
+instrument. There was no sign of a school or any side, excepting a small
+blackboard, which had been hastily thrust into a corner, and which bore,
+faintly traced in chalk, a sum in simple division.
+
+The visitors sat down in the warm red chairs, and looked around the room
+but a moment, when Miss Pillbody entered by a door connecting with the
+rear parlor. She bowed gracefully to Mr. Wilkeson, and was by him
+introduced to his two companions. To the father she was profoundly
+respectful, and to the daughter tender and affectionate, grasping her
+hand closely, and smiling a welcome upon her.
+
+Pet was instantly fascinated with her future teacher. There was
+something lovable not only in her intelligent face, pale with the
+protracted labors of her daily life, but in the infirmity of her eyes,
+for she was shortsighted, and could see objects distinctly only by
+nearly closing the lids. This peculiarity, not disagreeable in itself,
+won upon Pet's compassion, and made her feel more at home in the strange
+lady's presence than if she were conscious that a pair of full-sighted
+orbs were looking at her, and accurately noting her defects.
+
+Miss Pillbody's occupation, for some weeks past, had given her a new
+idea of the value of time, and she proceeded at once to business,
+without wasting a single word upon the weather. In less than five
+minutes, she had, by artful inquiries and a winning voice, found out the
+exact range and extent of Miss Minford's acquirements, and agreed with
+the father that a further education in the English branches was
+unnecessary at that time (with the exception, perhaps, of an occasional
+exercise in reading), and that his daughter might devote twenty-four
+lessons to French and the piano, with hopes of success, provided she
+could study and practise several hours a day at her own home.
+
+Mr. Minford replied, that she could study French at home to her heart's
+content, but he had no piano. Whereupon Mr. Wilkeson took the liberty of
+suggesting that it might be possible to borrow one, at a moderate rate,
+by the month, and set it up in their front room. Miss Pillbody applauded
+this idea, and it was instantly agreed to.
+
+"For certain reasons, which I will not now mention," said Mr. Minford,
+"I am anxious to hurry up her education."
+
+"By the way, what is your first name, my dear?" asked Miss Pillbody. "It
+is quite awkward to call you Miss Minford, you know."
+
+The inventor answered for his daughter. "Her name is Patty, miss; and we
+call her Pet, for short, instead of Pat, which would be hardly
+appropriate."
+
+"A pretty name," said Miss Pillbody; "and she _is_ a pet, if I mistake
+not." The teacher looked archly at Mr. Minford, and then affectionately
+at the daughter, through her half-shut eyes. "I promise you she shall be
+a pet here, provided, always, she learns her lessons like a good girl.
+We always insist on that first." The teacher waved her hand with
+magisterial authority as she spoke, but accompanied the act with a
+laugh, which made Pet laugh also.
+
+During this conversation, Mr. Minford had dwelt upon his machine in an
+undercurrent of thought; and an idea just then occurred to him, which he
+was desirous to test immediately. He therefore rose, and said that they
+would not detain Miss Pillbody any longer, and that his daughter would
+call and receive the first lesson at any time which that lady
+would name.
+
+"Her hour will be from nine to ten o'clock every other morning, and from
+three to four on alternate afternoons," said Miss Pillbody. "It is now
+half past ten," she added, consulting a watch. "Mrs. Penfeather, my
+eleven-o'clock pupil, is put of town to-day: so Miss Minford--that is.
+Pet--can commence now, and I will give her until twelve o'clock. This
+will save time."
+
+"Good!" remarked the inventor. "The great point is to save time. For
+certain reasons, as I said before, you have none to lose in educating my
+daughter. And, that we may not detain her a moment, Mr. Wilkeson, we
+will leave, if you please."
+
+Marcus Wilkeson was glad to do this, for the conversation had already
+reached its natural terminus. He therefore followed Mr. Minford's
+motion, and grasped his hat and cane.
+
+"You are not afraid to stay here, child?" said-the inventor.
+
+"Oh, no," replied Pet, with a happy laugh. "I already feel quite at
+home."
+
+"And she shall always feel so here, I assure you, sir," added Miss
+Pillbody.
+
+Mr. Minford's new idea occurred to him again with fresh force, and he
+hurriedly said: "Good-by, Pet. Be a good girl, now, and see how much you
+can learn in your first lesson." Then he kissed her, jerked a bow at
+Miss Pillbody, and made his exit into the hall. Marcus Wilkeson added
+his best wishes for the progress of the little scholar, bade her and her
+teacher a pleasant farewell, and followed Mr. Minford.
+
+The child ran after them to the front door, and exchanged good-bys with
+them until they had turned the corner of the next street, when she
+entered the schoolroom, and straightway began her first lesson in the
+accomplishments of life.
+
+
+
+BOOK THIRD.
+
+THE TRAIL OF THE SERPENT.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+"ONE--TWO--THBEE--FOUR."
+
+Pet studied hard, and made great progress. Her father and Marcus
+Wilkeson watched her developing education with equal pride, and
+constantly applauded and encouraged her.
+
+The inventor did not know one word of French beyond the colloquial
+phrases with which everybody is familiar; but he would ask his daughter
+to read the crisp and tinkling tongue to him for hours at a time. He
+would hammer softly and file gently as she read, so that he might not
+lose a word of it. He would hear no news but that which she translated
+from the triweekly French paper published in the city. With correct and
+careful tuition at Miss Pillbody's, these constant exercises at home,
+ambition, and an excellent memory for languages, Pet was soon able not
+only to satisfy her teacher, but to make herself understood, in a small
+way, by a real French woman, Mdlle. Duchette, the forewoman of a candy
+store on the nearest business avenue.
+
+Pet followed every lesson on the piano at Miss Pillbody's by three hours
+of daily practice at home. Marcus had hired for her a small piano,
+warranted to be just the thing for beginners. In other words, the keys
+and pedals were nearly worn out, and could not be much further damaged
+by unpractised hands and feet. This instrument was squeezed in between
+the bureau and the washstand, filling up the last spare place in the
+crowded little room. Pet wanted to have it set up in the next apartment,
+and practise there in the cold, alone; but neither her father nor Marcus
+would listen to that proposition for a moment.
+
+Mr. Minford's nerves were extremely sensitive to sound. They vibrated to
+it, like Aeolian harp in the wind. He placed pianos, cats, fish
+peddlers, and hand organs on precisely the same footing, as nuisances.
+Nothing but the ruling desire to make a lady of his child, could have
+steeled him to the endurance, hour after hour, of her monotonous
+"One--two--three--four," and the discordant banging which accompanied
+those plaintive utterances.
+
+The permanent discords with which the piano was afflicted, or the
+striking of a false note, would sometimes set his teeth on edge; but he
+would only hold his jaws tightly together, beat time with his head, and
+smile a hypocritical approval. Sometimes he would torture himself
+playfully, and make Pet laugh, by running a musical opposition with his
+three-cornered file--a small but effective instrument.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson was equally tolerant of Pet's practice, and there was
+little false pretence in the patience with which he listened. Happily,
+he was not all alive to sounds. Screeches and harmonies were pretty much
+the same to him. Since he was a boy, he had been trying (privately) to
+sing, or whistle, "Auld Lang Syne," and had not yet mastered the first
+bar of it. He watched Pet's little fingers moving up and down the piano
+with mechanical repetition, and was truly interested in the sight--for
+two reasons: first, the motion was graceful; and second, she was
+acquiring an accomplishment which he held in the highest esteem, because
+Nature had put it entirely beyond his reach.
+
+Sometimes, but not often, Bog was a listener at these rudimental
+concerts. Since Marcus had come to the relief of the family, Bog felt
+that his mission was ended. He knew that it was a piece of pure
+hypocrisy to call once or twice a week to see if he could be of any
+service, when he was aware that Mr. Minford had hired a woman, who lived
+on the floor below, to do all their household work, marketing, cooking,
+and general errands. He knew that Pet, on these occasions, asked him to
+go for a spool of thread, or a paper of needles, or a package of candy,
+merely to gratify him with the idea that he was making himself useful.
+When he came into the room tidily dressed, and highly polished as to his
+boots, he blushed even redder than he used to. It was not the
+acquisition of a little money by Mr. Minford that had exalted his
+daughter in the-eyes of Bog, but the French and the music. These two
+accomplishments seemed to lift her into an upper air of delicacy and
+refinement, for which Bog felt that his miserable education and clumsy
+manners quite unfitted him. After Bog had performed some little invented
+errand for her, she would reward him with a short exercise, and Bog
+would sit, with open mouth and crossed legs, staring at Pet's face and
+hands alternately, and beating time with his large red hands on
+his knees.
+
+Bog knew the negro songs of the period, and admired them. He would have
+liked to hear Pet play them, but feared she would think his musical
+taste very bad if he asked her to. Her "exercises," as she called them,
+he considered something perfectly wonderful, and belonging to a class of
+scientific music which a poor fellow like him could not be expected to
+enjoy. But, like many an older and more worldly-wise person, he
+pretended to be thrown into raptures by it, and, at every pause in the
+playing, would say, "Beautiful! a'n't it?" "That's prime!" or
+"Splendid!" or "The best I ever heerd." Sometimes, at his earnest
+entreaty, Pet would read a page of French to him; and he would listen
+with awe and reverence, as to a beautiful sibyl prophesying in an
+unknown tongue.
+
+Bog always paid these visits in the afternoon. Marcus Wilkeson always
+called in the evening. The two had met in the house rarely since New
+Year's. When they accidentally met on the sidewalk, within a square or
+two of the house, as they sometimes did, Bog colored up as if he were
+guilty of something. Once Marcus Wilkeson saw Bog at a distance, turning
+suddenly down a side street, as if to avoid him; and Marcus wondered
+what could be the matter with the boy. By industry and tact, Bog made
+money in his new partnership, and had already laid up a snug sum in the
+savings bank.
+
+Between Pet and her teacher a feeling of sisterly affection had sprung
+up. Miss Pillbody turned with a feeling of relief from her dull elderly
+pupils, stiff in manners, and firmly set in their habits, to this fresh,
+impressible young creature. What she did conscientiously to the others
+for pay, she would have done to Pet for love, had not her bills been
+settled in advance. Whenever Miss Pillbody had a spare hour or two,
+afforded by the indisposition of one of her older scholars (from
+excessive fatigue occasioned by a dinner party or other laborious
+hospitality the night before), she would send the red-headed servant to
+Mr. Minford's, and notify Pet, who was only too happy to go to her
+beloved teacher, and take an extra lesson.
+
+Mrs. Crull could not be called a promising pupil. Her intentions were
+excellent. Her patience and her good nature were unbounded. She was
+always punctual at her lessons. Neither cold nor storm could keep her
+away. While she was in the schoolroom, she would resolutely deny herself
+the pleasure of indulging in more than a dozen episodes on the fashions
+and bits of scandal which she picked up in her cruise through society.
+
+With the exception of these little wanderings, she would go through her
+recitations with as much correctness and docility as a sharp-witted
+child of twelve years. She felt a childlike pride in gaining the
+approval of her teacher. When she was under Miss Pillbody's
+instructions, and knew that every mistake would be courteously but
+firmly corrected on the spot (the teacher's invariable custom), she kept
+such a guard upon her tongue that she sometimes read or conversed in
+long sentences without making a single error. But when she was out of
+Miss Pillbody's sight, there were certain blunders which she fell into
+as surely as she opened her mouth.
+
+Sometimes Mrs. Crull and Pet would meet on the doorsteps of Miss
+Pillbody's house--the one going in and the other coming out--or on the
+sidewalk in the neighborhood. Mrs. Crull would catch the child by both
+hands, smack her heartily on the cheek (no matter how public the kiss),
+and then a conversation something like this would follow:
+
+"How bright and pretty you look this mornin', my darlin!" (Mrs. Crull
+could not remember to pick up the "g's," except under Miss Pillbody's
+eye, and then not always.)
+
+"Thank you, Mrs. Crull; I am quite well. How are you, marm?"
+
+"Oh! smart as a trap. Haven't known not a sick day these ten years."
+(Mrs. Crull was weak on the double negatives.)
+
+"How do you get along?" From motives of delicacy, Pet never added, "in
+your studies."
+
+"Well, I don't mind tellin' you, as you are my confidential little
+friend." Here Mrs. Crull would look around cautiously, to be sure no one
+was listening. "The other studies isn't so hard, but grammar knocks me."
+(Mrs. Crull's nominatives and verbs were irreconcilable.)
+
+Then Pet would say, telling an innocent fib:
+
+"I don't observe anything very wrong, Mrs. Crull."
+
+"Ha! ha! there you are flattering me, you little chick. I know, or
+think, I have improved a good deal with our dear Miss Pillbody; but a
+smart little scholar like you must see lots of mistakes in me."
+
+At this point, Pet would blush, and murmur, "No--no!"
+
+"Humbug!" Mrs. Crull would say. "I know my incurable faults, and I know
+that you know 'em. But Lor' bless you, child! there is plenty of ladies
+in good s'ciety" (Mrs. C. always slurred on the first syllable of that
+word) "who talk as bad as me. Their husbands, just like mine, got rich
+suddenly, you see. I tell you, I was 'stonished to find how many of 'em
+there was. They are thicker'n blackberries. I found out something else,
+too." Here Mrs. Crull would shake her head knowingly, like one who had
+discovered a great truth.
+
+Pet would know what was coming, but would ask: "Pray, what is it, Mrs.
+Crull?"
+
+"Why, I found out that, if you give good dinners and big parties, and
+keep a carriage, and have a conservatory, and rent a pew up near the
+altar, your little shortcomin's in grammar isn't no objection to you.
+'Money makes the mare go.' However, eddication, as Miss Pillbody says,
+is a good thing of itself, and I shall keep on tryin' to get it."
+
+These conversations always ended by an invitation to Pet to visit Mrs.
+Crull. "I'll have our carriage call for you," she would say, "at your
+father's house. We have no children, you know, and the old man would be
+very good to you; though, of course, it wouldn't do to hint about the
+school. But I can trust my little friend for that. Come, now,
+won't you?"
+
+But Pet always modestly declined these kind invitations. She knew her
+father's pride, and his aversion to the patronage of rich people.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+THE FALLING BOARD.
+
+One afternoon, Pet had been taking an extra lesson from Miss Pillbody,
+and had started homeward with a light heart, humming to herself a
+musical exercise which she had practised for the first time that day. A
+few doors from Miss Pillbody's, some workmen were repairing a wooden
+awning. The framework was covered with loose boards, which the
+carpenters were about to nail down. A feminine dread of danger would
+have induced Pet to make a wide detour of this awning; but her mind was
+so fully occupied by the musical exercise, that she walked, unheeding,
+right under it.
+
+"Look out! look out!" shrieked a chorus of voices overhead, accompanied
+by a rattle of falling boards. Pet sprang forward just in time to escape
+one of them, and to catch another on her shoulder. It touched her
+gently, not even abrading her skin, for its fall had been stopped midway
+by a young man.
+
+"Stupid!" "Silly creature!" "The girl's a blockhead!" "Where's her eyes,
+I wonder?" shouted the carpenters, after the manner of carmen and stage
+drivers, when you narrowly escape being run over by _their_
+carelessness, at the crossings.
+
+"Shut up!" said the young man, savagely. "Why the d---l don't you keep
+your boards where they belong, instead of tumbling them down on people's
+heads?--I hope you are not hurt, miss?" (in a gentle voice).
+
+"Oh, no; not at all. I am sure I thank you, sir, very much." Pet
+blushed, and hurried away.
+
+The young man and the carpenters then exchanged the customary abusive
+epithets with each other, which might have resulted in something more
+serious (though such verbal encounters rarely do), but for the desire of
+the young man to overtake the young girl whom he had saved from a
+bruised shoulder, or a worse accident. Shaking his fist at the four
+jeering carpenters, and muttering a farewell execration between his
+teeth, he rapidly followed Pet, and soon came up with her.
+
+"You are sure you are not hurt?" said he. "Those scoundrelly workmen!
+I'll thrash one of them yet."
+
+Pet was confused by the second appearance of the young man at her side,
+though she knew that he would follow her; even her brief experience
+having taught her that it is not in the nature of man to do a kindness
+to a woman, without exacting a full acknowledgment for it.
+
+"No, sir; I am not hurt the least bit," she replied, looking in his face
+no more than gratitude and civility required. Here she would have
+stopped, but she feared (charming simplicity of girlhood) that the
+young man would, some future day, get into trouble with the four
+carpenters. So she added, timidly: "As for the workmen, sir, they were
+not to blame. It was all my fault, running into the danger. I--I beg,
+sir, that you won't say another word to them."
+
+This was a long speech for timid Pet to make to a stranger, and she
+blushed fearfully at the end of it, and wished that the young man
+would go away.
+
+"They deserve a thrashing, every one of them," said he; "but, for your
+sake, I let them go." The young man spoke in a sweet voice, and his
+manner was respectful. Pet had observed, in several hasty side glances,
+that he was nicely dressed, and not ill-featured, in all except the
+eyes. But had his eyes been large and handsome, instead of small and
+forbidding, she would have desired his absence all the same.
+
+"You say you are not hurt," he continued; "but you may be, without
+knowing it. I have heard of people receiving serious injuries, and never
+finding them out till they got home. Have you far to go, miss?"
+
+"Only two blocks farther," said Pet, turning the corner.
+
+"The very route I was going," observed the young man.
+
+Although Pet felt that the young man's company was unnecessary and
+disagreeable, she did not like to tell him so. She kept silence until
+she reached her home, when she said, "I stop here, sir." She would have
+added, "Good-by, sir," or "Thank you, sir," or something equivalent, but
+instinct checked the expression, and she darted into the entry (the door
+being accidentally ajar), and shut the door after her, before the young
+man could say a word. Although the door was shut, he raised his hat
+respectfully as one often does on Broadway _after_ he has passed a
+female acquaintance upon whom he suddenly comes--the salute being
+received and acknowledged with a stare by the next lady, or ladies,
+following after. The young man then noted the number of the house,
+nodded satisfactorily to himself, and strolled very leisurely along the
+street, as if neither business nor pleasure had urgent demands upon him.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+SNEAKING JUSTIFIED.
+
+Neither Pet nor the young man saw the awkward figure of an overgrown
+boy, who had followed them at a distance, on the other side of the
+street, keeping the trunks of trees between them and him. This clumsy
+figure, upon which a suit of good clothes and a new cap looked strangely
+out of place, was Bog.
+
+The boy Bog was often seen lounging about the neighborhood of Miss
+Pillbody's school; and if the policeman on that beat had not known him
+to be an honest lad from childhood, he would have watched him as a
+suspicious character. From whatever part of the city Bog came home after
+a bill-posting expedition, he invariably made a circuit past Miss
+Pillbody's school, keeping the other side of the street always, and
+never looking at the house. He walked hurriedly by, but came to a sudden
+stop at a grocery store halfway up the second block beyond, and there he
+would stand, partly covered by an awning post, and look strangely
+around, letting his eyes fall occasionally, and as if by accident, on
+that house. If his object in these singular manoeuvres was to see Miss
+Minford, he always failed to improve the opportunity when it offered;
+for, as surely as Pet came out from the school, or turned into the
+street to go toward it, so surely did the boy Bog walk off whistling in
+another direction. Nobody can understand the motives of Bog's conduct,
+except those who have done the same thing in their youthful days.
+
+On this eventful afternoon (eventful as a starting point in a history of
+sorrows), Bog had taken his usual circuitous route home from a
+profitable professional tour on the east side of town. Reaching the
+grocery store, he sheltered himself behind the friendly post, and
+commenced looking up and down the street, and across the way, and into
+the sky, always winding up his mysterious observations by a single
+glance at Miss Pillbody's front door. When Pet came out, after her
+musical exercise, the boy Bog flushed up a little, turned upon his
+heels, and walked quickly away. He had not gone a dozen steps, before
+the shouts of the workmen and the sound of the first falling board
+reached his ears. He suddenly turned about, and saw a young man catching
+the next board that fell. His first impulse was to run to Pet's
+assistance; but a fatal spell chained his feet.
+
+Poor Bog had dreamed a thousand times, by night and by day, of the
+ineffable bliss of rescuing Pet from a mad dog, from a runaway horse,
+from the assault of ruffians, from drowning, from a burning building. He
+had his plans all laid for doing every one of these things. He would
+have coveted the pleasure of whipping three times his weight of any
+well-dressed, white-handed young men, who should presume to insult her.
+In imagination, he had done it times without number; and had contrived a
+private method to double up a number of effeminate antagonists in
+succession. But, in all his reveries, he had never anticipated peril to
+Miss Minford from a falling board; nor had it occurred to him that the
+supreme felicity of saving her from death or injury would ever be the
+lot of anybody else.
+
+The entire novelty of the accident and rescue struck him with amazement,
+and fastened him to the spot long enough to see that Pet walked away
+apparently unhurt. Hardly knowing what he did, or why he did it, he
+shifted his body behind the awning post so as continually to keep
+himself out of Pet's sight. Then the strong conviction came upon him
+that it was his duty to escort Pet home; for, although she did not seem
+to be hurt, she might be. This conviction was met and almost put down by
+the thought that Pet would know he had been watching for her; and he
+could not bear that. While he was halting and sweating between these two
+opinions, the unknown young man had finished his little colloquy with
+the four carpenters, and, by walking fast, had caught up with Pet.
+
+Then the boy Bog decided that his wisest course, under all the
+circumstances, would be to follow the couple at a distance, and see that
+no harm came to her from the young man.
+
+"If the feller insults her," murmured Bog, "just because he was lucky
+enough to do her a little bit of a kindness, I'll lick him till he's
+blue." Besides whipping him for the insults which he might offer, Bog
+felt that he could give him a few good blows for his impudence in
+assuming Bog's exclusive prerogative of rescuing that particular
+young girl.
+
+Bog looked very sheepish as he sneaked from one street corner to
+another, and skulked in shadows to avoid observation, though he tried to
+flatter himself that he was doing something highly meritorious. Two or
+three times, when the unknown young man inclined his head toward Pet, as
+if to speak to her, Bog entertained a hope that she would command him to
+leave her, and that he wouldn't. A single gesture from her, an impatient
+shrug of the shoulders, a turning away of her head, would have been all
+the hint that Bog needed to fly to her relief, and make up for his lost
+opportunity by knocking his dandy rival into the gutter.
+
+But not even Bog's sharp eyes could detect any impudent familiarity in
+the young man's conduct, or any desire on the part of Pet to get rid of
+him. "Everything is agin' me," said Bog, wiping the perspiration from
+his forehead.
+
+When Bog saw Pet part from the young man at Mr. Minford's door, his
+first wild idea was to call on her, quite by accident, in the course of
+half an hour. Perhaps she would tell him--as a piece of startling
+news--about her narrow escape from the board, and what the young man
+said to her. But Bog was unequal to the dissimulation involved in this
+plan, and abandoned it. Then he had a notion of following the young man,
+and seeing what became of him. But a sudden and very decided rising of
+fresh blood to Bog's cheeks and ears told him that he had played the
+part of spy long enough. So Bog determined--as many grown-up people in
+graver dilemmas do--to go home to supper.
+
+Bog found his supper all ready for him, and it was a good one. For his
+aunt, although the victim of a chronic rheumatism, had contrived to
+preserve a sharp appetite from the wreck of her former health, and
+cooked three meals for herself and two for Bog (who was never home at
+noon) daily. She was singularly punctual, too. Breakfast was always
+smoking hot on the table at 6 A.M.; and supper (and dinner combined, for
+Bog) was never a minute behind 5 P.M. in the winter time. Bog, who had a
+truly boyish idea of feminine excellencies, considered that this knack
+of cooking, and this amazing punctuality, were more than an offset for
+his aunt's little infirmities of temper, and her everlasting discourse
+on the rheumatics.
+
+Though the beef hash was good, and the toast nicely browned and
+buttered, and the tea strong, and the fire burning brightly through the
+grates of the stove, and the curtains snugly drawn, and everything
+cheerful and comfortable in Bog's humble home, the boy was unhappy, and
+could not eat.
+
+Happily, his aunt was so engrossed with her own physical troubles, that
+she never noticed indications of ill health in other people. She held
+that every other human ailment was unworthy of mention in the presence
+of her sovereign affliction. Whenever anybody presumed to speak of their
+little personal sufferings before her, she said: "You should thank
+Heaven you haven't got the rheumatics," and would then proceed to give a
+circumstantial history of her acquaintance with that disease. Therefore,
+on this occasion, she was quite unaware that poor Bog sat opposite to
+her with a pale, dejected face, playing aimlessly on his plate with his
+knife and fork. She thought only, and talked only, of her malady, which
+had been pranking in the oddest manner all day, and had settled, at
+last, in her "limbs." Bog's aunt had no legs that she would own to.
+
+After supper, Bog heaved a sigh, and said that he would go round to
+Uncle Ith's; and asked his aunt if she had any word to send by him.
+
+"Oh, no; nothing partickler," said she. "He don't care about me."
+
+Uncle Ith, as everybody called him, was Bog's uncle on his mother's
+side. Uncle Ith and the aunt had a standing difference touching that
+rheumatism. Whenever they met--which was rarely--Uncle Ith would ask
+her, with a wink, how she was; and when she candidly told him that she
+was in a dreadful state, he would laugh at her, and say that half of it
+was "imagination." This indignity he had repeated so often, that,
+latterly, she scorned to complain in his presence, and bore her anguish
+in noble silence.
+
+"All right," said Bog, who took no part in these family differences. He
+put on his cap, and left the house.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+UP IN THE AIR.
+
+"Uncle Ith" was one of the city bellringers, and lived at the top of a
+tower a hundred feet high, which vibrated with every stroke of the great
+bell hanging midway between his airy perch and the ground. He was sixty
+years of age, and had white hair, but he was as strong as younger men,
+and could swing the clapper against the side of the great bell with a
+boom that could be heard across rivers, and far into the peaceful
+country, on quiet nights. His eyes were so sharp, that, without the aid
+of a glass, he could read names on the paddle boxes of steamboats, where
+the unassisted vision of most persons descried nothing but a blur. He
+had done duty on that tower during the six years since it was built; and
+he knew the section of the city which lay spread out beneath him as a
+man knows his own garden. In the daytime, he could always guess, within
+a street or two, the location of any fire in his district. He knew all
+the smokes from a hundred factories, foundries, distilleries, and never
+confounded them with the fires which it was his business to detect. The
+presence of a new and suspicious smoke among the black stretch of roofs,
+caught his eye instantly; and he could tell in a moment, by its color,
+its speed of ascent, and the quantity of sparks accompanying it, whether
+it came from a carpenter's shop, a stable, a distillery, a camphene and
+oil store, or some other kind of building. In the nighttime, he knew the
+lights which mapped out the squares and the streets within his range of
+observation, almost as well as the astronomer knows the other lights
+that shine down upon the sleeping city from the heavens. He could fix
+the position of a fire by night rather better than by day, because he
+had the red reflection of the flames on well-known steeples, and high,
+prominent roofs to guide him.
+
+Such were Uncle Ith's qualifications for his place; and he was so loved
+and trusted by the firemen of his district, that no mayor, however beset
+by applicants for office, had ever dreamed of removing him. In all of
+Uncle Ith's limited relations with the world, he was esteemed an honest
+man; and his word would have possessed the literal novelty of being as
+good as his note, had necessity ever required him to borrow money. But
+Uncle Ith was frugal, and made his small salary suffice for himself and
+a family of seven motherless children.
+
+He had one eccentricity--a complete indifference to newspapers. He never
+bought nor borrowed them. "What's the use of reading 'em?" he would say.
+"Why not imagine the murders, suicides, political meetings, and other
+trash that fills 'em, and save your money for terbacker?" This did Uncle
+Ith, and he flattered himself that it was wisely done.
+
+The bell tower was not far from the boy's home, and in a few minutes he
+stood at the foot of it, and shouted to Uncle Ith: "Hallo, there!"
+
+Uncle Ith, always on the alert for calls, poked his head out of the
+window, which he left partly open for ventilation in the coldest nights,
+and answered, rather gruffly, "Well, what's wanted?" He never allowed
+his own children, nor any persons except his nephew Bog, and a few old
+firemen, friends of his, to visit him in the tower at night. Uncle Ith
+was conscientious. The presence of his children, with whom he loved to
+converse, or that of strangers, who would stare vacantly all over the
+lighted city, and ask innumerable questions, interfered with the
+strictness of his watch. Uncle Ith was a little eccentric, too, in his
+devotion to duty.
+
+"It's me, uncle," said Bog, screaming upward.
+
+"Glad to see you, Bog. You can come up," shouted the old man in return.
+He slung a latch key, fastened to a string, out of the window. It slid
+down the side of the tower, into Bog's hand. He unlocked the door, and
+the next moment the key was jerked aloft. The boy entered the base of
+the tower. He was so familiar with every crook and passage, that the
+small light of a gas jet, inside, was not necessary to show him the way.
+Up he ran, sometimes clearing two steps at a jump, slipping his hand
+lightly along the rough wooden banister. A few spiral turns brought him
+to the bell, which hung in an open framework of timber. He gave the huge
+bronze a familiar tap as he passed, and wound on and upward until he
+came to a trap door, which Uncle Ith held invitingly open. Then he
+sprang into the little room at the top of the tower, and Uncle Ith shook
+him by the hand.
+
+"You look well, I see, Bog. And how is your aunt?" Uncle Ith was mindful
+of the usages of society, and always asked after her.
+
+"Oh, she's smart," said Bog, totally oblivious of her rheumatism, "and
+sent her love to ye." Bog was a peacemaker.
+
+"Sent her rheumatism, I guess yer mean. No doubt she wishes I had it."
+
+Bog laughed, and his uncle laughed. And then his uncle, never forgetting
+duty, took a sharp look out of the eight clearly polished windows that
+commanded a view of the surrounding district. Discovering no sign of
+fire, he resumed the conversation with his nephew, asking him about his
+business (which he was happy to learn was prosperous), and giving him a
+quantity of good advice which none but a genius could remember, or an
+angel follow. During these exhortations, Uncle Ith paced to and fro in
+the little room, looking out of some window at the end of every
+sentence. Bog sat on a three-legged stool (the only seat except a
+backless chair) by the side of a miniature stove, on whose top hissed
+the kettle, from which Uncle Ith made his pot of coffee at midnight.
+
+The night was cold; the little fire was warm; and Bog liked to hear
+advice from his uncle; but his eyes would wander to a certain window, as
+if, for some reason, he would derive great pleasure in opening and
+looking out of it. This movement of his eyes was so frequent, that Uncle
+Ith observed it, and said:
+
+"Ah, I see! You want to stare out of that southeast window again. Now, I
+think the sight is handsomer to the west, where you can see the lights
+of Jersey City and Hoboken, and on the ferry boats and the shipping
+anchored in North River. But that's a matter o' taste. Well, look out o'
+the window, if you want to. I guess I can trust you for fires in
+that quarter."
+
+"That you may!" answered Bog, throwing open the southeast window.
+
+The stars above twinkled crisply in the frosty air; and the sky, with
+its low horizon on every side, seemed infinitely vaster than it did to
+Bog in the narrow and high-walled streets of the city. But Bog, though
+he used to puzzle over the wonders of the heavens when he was a few
+years younger, and had picked up a little something of astronomy from
+his uncle Ith (who knew something of that as of many other sciences),
+did not turn his gaze to them. Nor did he give more than a sweeping
+glance at the dotted line of lights below, stretching out in long
+perspectives, until the two luminous points at the end seemed blended
+into one. There were several parks in sight, which looked like portions
+of the sky let down on the earth, in all but the mathematical regularity
+of their mock stars. But Bog's eyes passed them by. To an inquisitive
+mind, there was something of interest to be seen and speculated over, in
+the lighted windows of houses all about him. People could be seen eating
+their late suppers, rocking by the fire, playing the piano, dancing,
+taking a rubber at whist or euchre, or diverting themselves with other
+recreations of winter house life. In one upper chamber, a physician was
+presenting a child just born to the proud father. In another, there was
+a mysterious spectacle, which a closer examination might have proved to
+be the preparing of a dead body for the morrow's burial. But Bog saw
+none of these sights.
+
+His eyes sought for, and found immediately, as if by instinct, one
+light, which, in his opinion, was the only one worth looking at on earth
+or sky. It was a single bright gas jet, burning very close to a window
+about six hundred feet distant from him in an air line. Several tall
+chimneys of intervening houses rose almost between him and this light,
+and, perhaps, their dark, spectral shapes aided him in identifying it so
+readily. The lower sash of the window through which the light shone was
+curtained, but the upper part was uncovered; and an observer on the
+tower, being fifty or sixty feet above the top of the curtain, could
+easily look into the room. Bog rubbed his eyes, into which the cold but
+not biting wind had brought the tears, and gazed anxiously into Mr.
+Minford's apartment.
+
+The pale inventor stood a few feet from the window, attentively
+examining a mass of machinery before him, upon which the light shone
+strongly. Only the tops of the wheels and of the more complex parts were
+visible; but there was one lever, or bar, connected with it, which rose
+above the whole, and could be seen by Bog to the extent of at least two
+feet. This was an addition to the strange machine as Bog had last seen
+it, and he contemplated it with fearful interest.
+
+Mr. Minford stood motionless for five minutes in the presence of his
+creation. He was ghostlike and frightful in that fixed attitude, and Bog
+wished that he would move. He did so, nodding his head, and smiling, as
+he bent down and detached some part of the machine. All but his head and
+his right shoulder then disappeared from view; but Bog knew, by the
+vibrating motion of his shoulder blade, that he was filing upon
+something. Mr. Minford then stooped again, as if to put the part of the
+machine back into its proper place. Having done this, he stood erect
+once more, folded his arms, and looked intently at the Mystery for the
+second time.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+TONGUES OF FIRE.
+
+But now Bog's attention was diverted from Mr. Minford, and his heart was
+made to beat more rapidly by a new sight. While he had kept both eyes
+closely fixed upon the inventor, he had looked with an oblique, or
+reflected vision, into the other window of the room. This window was
+uncurtained, and Bog could distinctly see the chairs, bureau, and other
+articles of furniture. A new light (so Bog oddly thought) was suddenly
+irradiated through the darker portion of the apartment by the entrance
+of Pet from the hall. She had no bonnet on; and Bog reasoned (if he
+could be said to reason in his excited state) that she had been spending
+a part of the evening, as was often her wont, with a poor family, rich
+in children, who lived on the floor below. Her father smiled upon the
+problem before him, as a new difficulty melted away under his burning
+gaze. Then he turned, and smiled at Pet. She ran toward him, and he
+kissed her tenderly. Bog was devouring this little episode with open
+mouth and eyes, when the hoarse voice of Uncle Ith broke in upon the
+enchantment:
+
+"Hallo! there's a fire."
+
+"What! Where?" shouted Bog, forgetting where he was.
+
+"Why, you blind man!" said Uncle Ith; "straight afore ye. Don't ye see
+it breaking out?"
+
+Bog cast his eyes about him wildly; and, sure enough, directly in the
+range of Mr. Minford's house, but four or five blocks beyond, there was
+an illuminated streak of smoke curling up from a roof.
+
+"It's in my district!" cried Uncle Ith. "So here goes." He seized the
+long iron lever near him, by which the enormous clapper of the bell was
+swung, and moved it like the handle of a pump. The second motion was
+followed by a hoarse sound, which shook the tower to its foundations,
+and started into listening attitudes a thousand firemen in their engine
+or hose houses, in the streets, at the theatres, or at their own homes.
+
+"Sha'n't I help you?" asked Bog, who always proffered his services on
+these occasions.
+
+"Pooh! no. It's baby play for me." By this time Uncle Ith had evoked the
+second gruff note from the deep throat of the imprisoned monster below.
+Then came a third in quicker succession, and louder, as if the bell had
+warmed up to the work, and then other notes, until the district had been
+struck; and then the bell, as if rejoicing in its strength to resist
+blows, murmured plaintively for a repetition of them. Long before this
+sad sound had died away, the deep bass of the City Hall bell, the shrill
+tenor of the Post Office bell, and the intermediate pitches of the bells
+all over the city, had taken up the chorus of alarm. There was a rattle
+of engines, hose carriages, and hook-and-ladder trucks through the
+streets. There was a frantic rush of men and boys, some with cumbrous
+fire-caps on their heads, and putting on their coats as they ran. How
+they knew the location of the fire, none could guess, for it had not yet
+streamed out against the sky; but know it they did; and the dove goes to
+its cote not more directly than they centred from all parts of the
+district upon the exact spot of the fire. Meanwhile, Uncle Ith lashed
+his mighty instrument into a sonorous fury; and all the other bells
+played their echo, even to the far-away tinkler on Mount Morris, which,
+having few fires in its own neighborhood to report, took a pleasure in
+telling its little world of those which were raging down town.
+
+For the information of his uncle, and to atone in part for his previous
+neglect, Bog devoted only a half eye to the Minford family, and kept the
+rest of his optics on the fire. Just after its discovery, the smoke had
+loomed up dense and black, as if it were trying to suffocate the flames
+beneath. Then it changed rapidly to a light blue, and was chased faster
+upward by two tongues of fire. These tongues leaped aloft with a sudden
+impulse, and shed a revelation of light over acres of houses, and
+brought out church steeples in vivid relief against the sky, and put a
+new gilding on storm-beat en vanes and weathercocks. All this Bog
+described in his own way to his uncle; and his uncle, stooping at the
+lever, kept on ringing with unabated zeal; and all the other bells
+banged away like an orchestra of which Uncle Ith was the leader.
+
+Then Bog saw the forms of men suddenly spring into sight, as if out of
+the very roof, between the two fiery tongues. The tongues licked the air
+about them with savage whirls; but the brave fellows dodged back, and
+were unhurt. Then, advancing boldly again, they released their hands
+from something which they had been holding, and lo! four jets of water
+struck at the very roots of the flames, tripped at them, and made them
+stagger, drove them twice into the roof, and caught them with deadly
+accuracy as they came out again; and, in less than five minutes, changed
+all their brave splendor to dull, black smoke, and set the victor's mark
+upon them--the column of white steam which arises from the half-quenched
+embers, and proclaims that the fire is put out of mischief at last.
+
+"Nothing but a kind o' white smoke, now," said Bog.
+
+Uncle Ith, who had just rung the last stroke of a round, relinquished
+the lever, and looked over the shoulder of his nephew. "The fire's out,"
+said he. "When you see the steam comin' up that way, you may know that
+the water has whipped." The old man then seated himself in the backless
+chair, produced a short black pipe from a crossbeam overhead, and
+rewarded himself with a few long puffs.
+
+When Uncle Ith had a pipe in his mouth, he became didactic, and he
+therefore proceeded to renew his donations of valuable advice to his
+nephew, who was still looking hard out of the southeast window.
+
+Bog cocked his head on one side, to make a show of listening, and said
+"Yes, sir," now and then, which was all that his uncle expected of him.
+But his whole mind, and his heart, were in the little double-windowed
+room, where Pet was now practising upon the piano. Through the
+uncurtained glass, Bog could see her hands weaving music with the keys,
+and almost fancy he could hear it. The inventor bent over his machine,
+and plied the hammer, the chisel, and the file, on various parts of it.
+Now and then he would pause, stand erect, and look proudly toward his
+child, and keep time to her music with inclinations of his head. Bog,
+without knowing it, would do the same thing.
+
+While the boy was gloating over this scene, unconscious of the swift
+passage of time, the clock on the nearest church struck nine. Bog
+sighed, for he knew that that was Pet's hour for bed. Sure enough. Her
+little hands shut up the piano, and neatly smoothed down the cloth over
+it. Then she lit a candle, ran up to her father and kissed him, and in a
+moment was lost from Bog's sight in her chamber. As she disappeared, the
+boy's lips murmured "Good-night" with a fervor which made that simple
+colloquial phrase both a prayer and a blessing.
+
+When Pet had gone, Bog suddenly found that the night had become cold,
+and that he was beginning to shiver. So he shut the southeast window,
+and took a seat by the fire to warm himself before going home.
+
+
+
+BOOK FOURTH.
+
+CHILDREN OF THE WORLD.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+MYNDERT VAN QUINTEM AND SON.
+
+One morning, when Marcus Wilkeson returned home from a ramble, he found
+his half-sister Philomela violently dusting the furniture and books of
+the snug little back parlor. The air was full of dancing motes, which
+looked large and suffocating in the sunshine. Marcus had politely
+requested his sister, fifty times at least, _not_ to molest that
+sanctuary of meditation oftener than once a fortnight. To which she
+always replied: "I suppose you great lazy fellows would like to have the
+cobwebs grow on you. But you sha'n't, while I am in the house." Then,
+with a few dexterous flourishes of her cloth, she would start the dust
+up in a cloud.
+
+On this morning, Marcus Wilkeson, being in the most tolerant of moods,
+merely said "Whew!" and took a seat by his favorite window, the lower
+sash of which he threw wide open, with the vain hope that some of the
+dust would blow out. Miss Philomela smiled at this act so as to be seen
+by him. But he did not appear to notice it. Then she whisked her cloth
+under his very nose, as if to challenge objections. After this
+aggravation had been repeated three or four times, Marcus felt compelled
+to make a mild protest.
+
+"Great deal of dust, sister," he said, stating what he presumed would
+not be contradicted.
+
+"Is there?" replied Miss Philomela, exulting in the success of her
+stratagem. "_I_ didn't notice it; nor would you, if you had some
+business to look after, like other people, instead of stopping in the
+house all day."
+
+Marcus had heard that argument and triumphantly put it down so often,
+that he did not think it worth another word. Consequently he
+said nothing.
+
+This obstinate silence galled Miss Philomela; and, after waiting full
+three minutes to see if Marcus would not answer, and meanwhile dusting
+prodigiously in his neighborhood, she said:
+
+"Well, it's some gratification to know that you do not have the
+hardihood to defend yourself. You are well aware that nothing can
+justify a healthy, middle-aged man--I may say, a young one--in retiring
+from active life and society, and becoming a great lazy mope."
+
+"I'm really too lazy to discuss it now," replied Marcus, smiling, and
+filling his meerschaum from the tobacco pouch which hung conveniently at
+the window's side.
+
+Philomela regarded him for a moment with an expression of pity and
+horror. Then she heaved a sigh, and muttered something about
+misapplied talents.
+
+"You had better say, 'Misapplied brooms and dusters,'" retorted her
+half-brother. "I should be perfectly happy now, but for this
+confounded dust."
+
+"Laugh away. I know you despise my sisterly advice. But you can never
+say that I have not done my duty--"
+
+"To the furniture, most assuredly," interrupted Marcus.
+
+Miss Philomela Wilkeson heaved another sigh in the best style of
+martyrdom, and precipitately left the room, followed by her brother's
+cheerful, rattling laugh.
+
+"A good old girl enough," said Marcus to himself, "but for her
+well-meaning and strictly conscientious habit of making people
+miserable."
+
+Then he lighted his meerschaum, closed the window, squared his chair in
+front of it, and looked out. His face instantly flushed with pleasure at
+a strange sight. The blinds of the lower parlor windows across the way,
+which had been shut for several weeks, were now thrown open, and the
+white-haired old gentleman, looking thin and pale, sat in his armchair
+in his old place, and was gazing at him. At least so Marcus thought; but
+he hesitated to bow until the old gentleman gave a distinct salutation.
+Marcus returned it two or three times with emphasis, as if to express
+his great pleasure at seeing his unknown neighbor and friend again. He
+blushed as he did so, for he was conscious of wilful neglect and cruel
+indifference, in not having called upon him on New Year's day, or since
+then, during the period of the closed blinds; and worse still, in not
+having thought of him a dozen times, though he had taken the trouble to
+pass his door on his way to or from Mr. Minford's, and had felt relieved
+to see no black crape on the bell-pull.
+
+"But then," thought Marcus, pleading with and for himself, "my mind has
+been occupied--very much occupied--- with other matters. Now, if he
+beckons to me again, I will go over to him without a moment's delay. My
+old friend looks very sick and unhappy."
+
+Just then the old gentleman reached out his thin white hand, as if the
+motion required an effort, and beckoned twice. Marcus answered with two
+bows, and immediately rose, and laid down his pipe on the window sill,
+thereby implying that he would come over at once. The old gentleman
+smiled faintly, to express his delight.
+
+In a few minutes Marcus Wilkeson stood at the antique mansion, and
+pulled the bell. It vibrated feebly as if it shared with the house and
+its owner the infirmities of age. The bell was answered by an old,
+neatly dressed female servant. She had been told to admit the caller
+instantly, and said, "Mr. Van Quintem will see you, sir."
+
+He entered a wide hallway, and followed the noiseless step of the
+servant, trying to remember, without success, where he had heard the
+name of Van Quintem.
+
+At the end of the hall the servant opened a door, and ushered him into a
+room decorated at the edges of the ceiling with heavy wooden carvings,
+and furnished in the style of the last century. The old gentleman partly
+rose from his soft armchair, supported himself by one hand on it, and
+extended the other to his visitor.
+
+"My name is Myndert Van Quintem, sir," said he, "and I am very glad to
+see you." There was a pleasant smile in the old gentleman's pale face,
+and a warmth in the grasp of his thin right hand, that attested the
+sincerity of his words.
+
+"And my name is Marcus Wilkeson, sir; and I am truly happy to make your
+acquaintance," responded the visitor, in his most genial manner.
+
+The old gentleman here showed symptoms of faintness from the exertion of
+standing; and Marcus, taking him by the arm, forced him gently into his
+easy chair, and took a seat beside him.
+
+"I must apologize for not having called before," said Marcus. "I--"
+
+"Not a word, sir," interrupted the old gentleman. "It is I who must
+apologize for the rudeness of nodding and beckoning to a perfect
+stranger. But the fact was, I could not regard you as a stranger. Seeing
+you at your window, smoking and reading, day after day, while I was
+smoking and musing at mine, I gradually came to sympathize with you, and
+to wish that the distance across the lots was short enough to allow us
+to converse. I thought, perhaps, that on some subjects we might interest
+each other. Now, be good enough to fill that pipe and smoke it, while I
+tell you in few words who I am."
+
+He pointed to a meerschaum, carved into the semblance of a Dutchman's
+head, which looked not unlike his own. It was fitted to a long Turkish
+stem, and hung against the wall by a silver chain, within reach of his
+hand. Five other pipes of quaint design hung near it.
+
+Marcus protested against smoking in an invalid's presence; but the old
+gentleman insisted upon it, and playfully but firmly threatened to smoke
+the pipe himself if his guest did not. So Marcus filled the large bowl
+from a paper of old, mild tobacco, which hung in a pouch near it, and
+drew a few gentle whiffs, intending to let the pipe go out. But the old
+gentleman watched him.
+
+"'Twon't do," said he. "That old pipe of mine is not used to neglect. As
+a particular favor, now, I beg that you'll smoke, and puff out clouds,
+as I have often seen you do across the way."
+
+Marcus protested again, but the old gentleman stubbornly maintained his
+point; and it was not till the pungent smoke began to curl upward, that
+he proceeded with his personal disclosure.
+
+"Have you ever heard my name before, Mr. Wilkeson?" said he.
+
+Marcus bowed, and said that he had not had that pleasure.
+
+"Of course not," returned the old gentleman, not displeased with the
+answer. "I have taken infinite pains to keep out of public life since I
+retired from business, twenty-five years ago. Even before that time, I
+was known only to a very few persons as a silent partner in the large
+iron-importing house of Sniggs, Buffet & Co. I had no relations, and few
+friends, in the common acceptance of that much-abused word. My only
+happiness was in my wife--that is her picture hanging over the
+mantelpiece--and this house, which my father built, and which, according
+to a tradition in our family, is on or near the spot where my
+great-great-grandfather, the fourth Myndert Van Quintem, perished by the
+hands of the Indians."
+
+"Then," interrupted Marcus, "you belong to an old Dutch family?"
+
+"To one of the oldest on record," replied Mr. Van Quintem. "My great
+ancestor, the genuine original Myndert, came over as cook with Hendrik
+Hudson. We have an iron spoon of doubtful authenticity, said to have
+descended from him. Sometimes I have paid the penalty of this ancient
+and distinguished origin, by receiving stupid compliments on my old
+Dutch blood, as if that species of blood were better than any other.
+That sort of nonsense I have always answered by informing the flatterer
+that the first bearer of my venerable name was a cook; the second, a
+tanner; the third--well, the least said about the third the better; and
+the fourth, a barber. My grandfather, a very worthy saddler, in old
+Queen's street, was the first of the series that was ever able to buy
+and hold real estate. My father increased upon his purchases, and, when
+the property came into my possession, I, in turn, added to its extent as
+fast as I could. In forty years, this property has become valuable; and
+I now find myself and my lots occupying a large space on the tax rolls.
+
+"It is a curious fact, and illustrates the uncertainty of human events,
+that my success is the result of accident, and is not in the least due
+to my judgment or foresight. Every kind of business that I have engaged
+in--and I have tried several kinds--has failed. Sniggs, Buffet & Co.
+almost finished me; and, if I had not backed out as I did, the better
+part of my estate would have been sacrificed. Among those who know me, I
+pass for a very shrewd business man, who has made a fortune by his
+numerous failures. This tribute to my abilities is flattering, but I
+must disclaim it. But I am tiring you with these petty details of
+my life."
+
+"Not at all, really," said Marcus Wilkeson, who enjoyed the old
+gentleman's frankness.
+
+Mr. Van Quintem paused, and began to show signs of fatigue. He asked for
+a cordial which stood on an old sideboard with great lion's feet, near
+his visitor's chair. Having sipped of its contents, he expressed himself
+relieved, and resumed his story:
+
+"As I was saying, I found my whole happiness in my wife, and in this
+house. With the exception of a few friends of my youth--now all
+dead--she was my only society. Like me, she was fond of retirement and
+of books. You, sir, can appreciate the quiet, satisfying pleasure which
+we derived from books, for you, too, are a constant, happy reader; and
+you have fine books, as I know by the size of them. You see, I have been
+observing you closely," he added, with a smile. The old gentleman's
+smile was sweet, but relapsed into a mild expression of sadness.
+
+"Not more closely than I have observed you," said Marcus. "I have often
+wondered what stout old quartos you were reading. To tell you the truth,
+I inferred, from the dimensions of the books and your white cravat, that
+you were a clergyman." Marcus might have added, that the old gentleman's
+flowing white locks and benevolent features had contributed to the
+illusion; but he had already discovered that Mr. Van Quintem, like
+himself, was averse to compliments.
+
+The old gentleman took the remark good-naturedly. "This is not the first
+time," said he, "that my old-fashioned fancy for a white cravat has led
+to that mistake. You will find very little of the body of divinity in
+that library. When I recover from this illness so as to hobble about, we
+will look over my little collection together."
+
+Marcus said that nothing could give him greater delight, unless it was
+to show his friend his own humble library.
+
+"Thank you," returned Mr. Van Quintem; "and I promise to run over and
+look at it when I am well enough to go out." The haste with which the
+old gentleman made the last remark, and the fact that he did not invite
+his visitor to examine the library then and there, led Marcus to think
+that the old gentleman had some private trouble on his mind, which he
+wished to diminish by imparting to another. Marcus was right.
+
+The old gentleman heaved a sigh, and resumed:
+
+"For ten years after my retirement, my wife and I lived on in the calm,
+happy manner that I have described. We had no griefs--not even that one
+which most commonly afflicts parents, the loss of children. Yet I
+sometimes think, sir, that it would be far better for some children to
+die in their youth and innocence, than to grow up and become bad men,
+and torture and almost kill their parents with ingratitude and
+unkindness." Marcus guessed what was to come.
+
+"We had but one child--a boy--born long after I had given up all hopes
+of having an heir. I need not tell you, sir, what a joy he was to us in
+his infancy; for you, too, I presume, are a husband and a father."
+
+Marcus replied confusedly, and as if it were something to be ashamed of,
+that he was neither the one nor the other, though he hoped some day
+(here he was exceedingly awkward) to be both.
+
+The old gentleman was so wrapped up in his own thoughts, that he did not
+seem to notice the reply. He again braced himself in the chair, as if he
+would, by that act, gather strength to proceed.
+
+"Of course, I called the child Myndert. He was the seventh of that name;
+and I used to think, even when he was a toddling little baby, what plans
+of education would be best suited to develop his talents. I know that a
+parent's partiality is a magnifying glass of high power; but, to the
+best of my belief, he was a most precocious child. I think so now, as I
+look back upon the days of his prattling innocence.
+
+"After a great deal of debating, my wife and I concluded to make a
+lawyer of him. He was to be the first lawyer in our family annals; and
+we fondly pictured to ourselves that he would become an eminent judge,
+or that he would step from the bar into political life, and shed honor
+upon his country and his family as a statesman. I know how ridiculous
+these imaginings must seem to you, and I recall them only to show you
+how deeply our hearts were wrapped up in that boy.
+
+"When our little Myndert was five years old, my wife died." Here the old
+gentleman clutched the arms of the chair firmly with both hands. "Our
+son had been very sick for a week before, and my dear Clara had nearly
+worn herself out watching over and nursing him. A severe cold, which she
+caught while going to the druggist's in a rain, did the rest. She died
+with one arm around me and the other around little Myndert; and her
+last words were a blessing on the boy, and a request that I would always
+love him for her sake." The old gentleman's eyes glistened with tears,
+and his lips twitched convulsively. Marcus evinced his sympathy in the
+fittest way, by keeping silence, and fixing his eyes on the floor.
+
+"Well, sir, not to be tedious, I lavished my whole heart upon that
+child. His presence seemed to be some consolation for the great loss I
+had sustained. His features were so like hers, in all except the eyes,
+that I seemed to see her through him; and thus, in a peculiar sense, I
+loved him for her sake, indeed. He was petted and caressed from his very
+cradle. Ah, there was my error; but who can blame a father for
+over-loving his only son, and that one motherless!
+
+"He early showed indications of a fierce temper and a sullen pride, in
+which respects he resembled not his mother, but her father, who, with
+the exception of these two faults, was a good and just man. I have heard
+of cases in which strong mental traits jump over a generation, and
+appear in the next one. I thought, and still think, that my son's
+singular peculiarities might be explained in that way. If you will bear
+with me, sir, I will give you some illustrations of his character.
+
+"When he was nine years of age, a dear friend, now dead, advised me not
+to injure so precocious an intellect by too much cultivation, but to put
+the boy on a farm, where he could divide his time between healthful work
+and youthful sports, and would be kept away from the contaminating
+influences of the city, I agreed to make the experiment, though
+reluctantly, for I could not bear the thought of parting with my child.
+An old family acquaintance who owned a farm in Dutchess County, and had
+no children, was willing to take my boy.
+
+"Little Myndert liked the idea of going into the country, and for two
+weeks he behaved very well; and his acting father wrote me, that if I
+could spare the boy, he would like to adopt him as his own. But the next
+letter, a week afterward, brought a different story. It was while
+Myndert was not put to work, that he behaved so well. But when the
+farmer gave him a little hoe, and asked him to grub up a few weeds in
+the garden, the lad threw it down, and said to the farmer, 'I hate you.'
+This was his favorite expression to those who aroused his displeasure
+when a child. The good man was astonished at this insubordination, and
+tried to persuade Myndert to do as he was told. But persuasion was
+useless; and so were the threats with which the farmer tried to frighten
+him. As for whipping the boy, he was, like me, too soft-hearted to
+do that.
+
+"So Myndert became the master there, as he had been here. His real
+nature now came out. From that time until the worthy farmer sent the boy
+home in despair--ten weeks later--he was the wonder and terror of the
+neighborhood. Chickens, goslings, and young ducks were killed; boughs of
+apple trees and other fruit trees were broken down; strawberry beds were
+entered, and the plants pulled up by the roots; the windows of the
+village church and schoolhouse were broken with stones; and three
+fourths of these acts were traced to little Myndert. He always denied
+the charges, and put on an air of innocence, which deceived
+many persons.
+
+"The cunning which he exhibited in doing these malicious acts, and
+trying to divert suspicion from himself, was truly wonderful in a child
+of his age. One day he was caught by a farmer in the act of killing some
+young chickens; and the owner was so mad, that he whipped the boy
+soundly. That very night the farmer's wood shed was set on fire from the
+outside; but a heavy rain came on, and put out the flames. The traces of
+the fire were plainly to be seen next morning; and the farmer found
+proofs enough, I fear, to have convicted my son of a felony.
+
+"My friend informed me of all these facts in a very sorrowful letter,
+and I hastened to take my son once more under my own roof.
+
+"Here I tried every method that a father's love could devise to reform
+him. But all was useless. He seemed to have no idea of truth or honor,
+of affection or duty to me. When, at times, I thought he was showing
+signs of improvement, I always found, afterward, that he was only
+concealing his mischievous acts more carefully. I call them mischievous,
+though the word 'malicious' would perhaps describe them better; for they
+were all undertaken in a spirit of evil, and not of fun." The old
+gentleman here rested, and refreshed himself with a sip of the cordial.
+
+"But it would take days to tell you of all my troubles with that boy,
+and I will briefly refer to the rest of them.
+
+"By the advice of another friend (for I have never taken any step in the
+treatment of my child without first seeking for friendly advice), I sent
+him, when twelve years of age, to a celebrated school in Massachusetts,
+where the discipline is very strict. I had a personal interview with the
+master, and requested him, as a favor, to chastise Myndert, if all other
+means failed to subdue him. Though I could not bear to whip him, I was
+willing that he should suffer a proper punishment, inflicted in the
+right spirit, from others. At this school he conducted himself properly
+for about three weeks, and was taking a high rank as a scholar, when his
+natural tastes asserted themselves, in all sorts of wicked pranks on his
+fellow pupils, on the teachers, and on people in the village. The master
+at first expostulated, and then gave Myndert a good thrashing. That
+night the master narrowly escaped being hit by a large stone thrown
+through his bedroom window. Next morning my son was missing, and for
+three weeks no trace of him could be found. I advertised in newspapers,
+describing him, and offering large rewards for his recovery. I had the
+same notice printed on bills, and stuck up all through the country. I
+employed detectives to trace out the runaway. A month passed, and no
+tidings. I was in despair. Toward the close of the fifth week, one of
+the detectives struck a trail on Cape Cod, and, after a patient search,
+found the young rascal living, under the assumed name of Carlo, with a
+fisherman, in a little seaside hamlet. As the fishing season was a good
+one, and men were scarce, the fisherman had gladly received my son as
+an apprentice for his board. The novelty, excitement, and sometimes
+danger of the pursuit pleased Myndert greatly, and the old fisherman
+said that he was a good hand for a boy. When the detective found him,
+however, he was beginning to be tired of his strange occupation (nothing
+pleases him long), and he consented to come home on condition that I
+would not scold him, and would give him plenty of pocket money. I had
+been weak enough to authorize the making of these promises.
+
+"The return of my prodigal son made me happy. As I had promised, I did
+not reproach him, and gave him all the money that he wished. He was not
+old enough to know how to spend money viciously. His tastes, though
+costly, were comparatively innocent. From childhood he had always been
+very fond of new clothes, and he indulged that passion to the utmost. At
+twelve years of age, he was called the 'Young Dandy' all through this
+part of the town; and I sometimes heard of his attracting attention
+on Broadway.
+
+"He was so well satisfied with my generosity, that he consented to
+receive two short lessons daily from tutors at the house, and surprised
+them, as he did everybody, with his wonderful aptitude for learning."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+BUYING GOOD BEHAVIOR.
+
+"For three years I bought my son's good behavior with unlimited pocket
+money, and foolishly thought that his nature had changed. Occasionally
+he would do malicious acts to his tutors, or to my housekeeper or
+servants; but these occurred less frequently as time rolled on, and at
+last ceased. At fifteen years of age, he was sufficiently advanced in
+learning to pass a college examination, and I determined to send him to
+college. He was delighted at the proposal, for he had begun now to
+appreciate the advantages of education. Anticipating that he would have
+trouble with the Faculty, I selected a college which was distinguished
+for its means of learning, and was jet very lenient in its discipline.
+Myndert easily obtained admission, and at once took high rank in his
+class. Knowledge came so easy to him, that he had plenty of leisure, and
+I feared that his old vicious habits would break out again. Greatly did
+I rejoice not to hear a single complaint of him during his first term.
+But, alas! I found, when he returned home, that he had learned to drink
+and gamble, and that the large sums of money I had sent him had been
+squandered in carousals, and over the card table. Still he maintained
+the first position in his class, and of that I was proud.
+
+"I remonstrated against his vices. He admitted that there was some truth
+in what I had heard, mixed up with a great deal of exaggeration; and
+justified his conduct by saying that it was the fashion, and he could
+not keep out of it if he would. His good health and naturally high
+spirits did not appear to be in the least affected by dissipation, and I
+gladly allowed myself to believe that many of the reports about him
+were false.
+
+"The next term was still more expensive; and I found out that the larger
+portion of my heavy outlay went for liquor and gambling. Still he kept a
+high grade in his class--taking the second rank instead of the first;
+and the Faculty either were ignorant of his misconduct, or did not think
+it worth punishing. Through his first, second, and third years at
+college, these were his only vices. His constitution, though strong, was
+gradually undermined; and, at the end of his junior year, he showed
+unmistakable signs of bloating, became very irregular in his attendance
+on recitations, and had sunk to be the fifteenth in his class. I had
+hopes that he would pass through his fourth year safely, and get a
+diploma. But, at the very beginning of that year, he kept drunk, and
+absented himself from recitations for a fortnight, and, when called
+before the Faculty for a mild reprimand, cursed them with the most
+horrible oaths, defied them, and left their presence. They had no
+choice but to expel him from the college; and, a week after, he was
+brought home to me nearly dead with intoxication.
+
+"A month's illness followed, which brought him almost to the grave.
+Though, at the time, I prayed with all a father's love for his recovery,
+I have since thought--- oh, how often!--that it would have been far
+better for him to have died. But he was spared; and, having been
+thoroughly frightened by his narrow escape from the effects of
+drunkenness, he vowed, on his recovery, that he would never touch
+another drop of liquor. This pledge he kept for some months after his
+health was fully restored.
+
+"Having decided to educate him for the law--the only profession that he
+did not hold in contempt--I procured a place for him in the office of
+Mulroy, Biggup & Lartimore, an excellent firm with whom I had had
+some dealings.
+
+"Myndert entered upon his study of the profession with such ardor, that
+I was obliged to caution him against ruining his health. But he only
+laughed, and said he wanted to make up for past follies. I had never
+before seen him in a penitent mood, and I was delighted. Mr. Mulroy, who
+has had a hundred pupils in his time, told me that he never had a more
+promising one than Myndert. He was a regular and constant attendant at
+the office, and spent all his evenings at home. The natural strength of
+his constitution came to his aid, as if to encourage him in his efforts
+to reform; and, notwithstanding his severe studies, he began to look in
+better health than he had ever been. Thus things went on six whole
+weeks, and I was happy, and busied myself in framing plans for my son's
+advancement in life.
+
+"He told me, one day, that he had joined a club of young law students,
+who met every evening and discussed legal points, held mock courts, and
+thus sought to familiarize themselves with the duties of their
+profession; and asked me if I approved of it. He sought my approval so
+rarely for anything, that I freely gave it, cautioning him again,
+however, to be careful of his health. He laughed at my apprehensions.
+But I was pained to see how soon my fears proved true. Within a
+fortnight, the rosy color of his cheeks had disappeared, and his eyes
+were palpably sunken, dull, and marked with a sickly blue beneath. He
+never returned home till midnight, and sometimes was out till three
+o'clock in the morning. I scolded him for devoting so much time to his
+law club; but he said that the members were, like himself, enthusiastic
+students, and that he was always the first to leave their fascinating
+debates and mimic trials. A week later, I marked the familiar bloat in
+his cheeks, and suspected the truth.
+
+"Placing a watch upon his movements--no easy matter, for he is very
+shrewd and cautious--I soon found out that the law club was a myth, and
+that his nights were passed in the wildest debauchery. He had not only
+resumed all his old vices, but had acquired new ones.
+
+"When I reproved him, as I did with just indignation, he threw off the
+mask of concealment, which he said he was tired of wearing, and became
+the same bold, defiant, reckless boy that he always was; while I
+continued to be the same weak, foolish, fond parent. I cannot recount
+the tortures inflicted upon me by my son since that fatal discovery. He
+has not only abandoned all his law studies (having been expelled from
+the office of Mulroy, Biggup & Lartimore for grossly insulting a young
+female client), and utterly ruined his own body and soul, but, by his
+acts, he has brought shame upon several families.
+
+"When this new series of outrages came to my knowledge, I threatened to
+disinherit him. He laughed at me. He knew how I loved him for his
+mother's sake, and, with that hold upon my affections, he defied me.
+
+"To heartless indifference he gradually added insults, and often cursed
+me, his own father, in this very room, where his mother has rocked his
+cradle a thousand times while she listened to my reading of an old poem
+or novel. The last of his crimes of which I have heard, was brought to
+my knowledge about six weeks ago. It was a piece of treachery the most
+villanous, and I told my son, in plain words, what I thought of it. I
+was weak and nervous from an illness which is hereditary in my family,
+and I reprimanded him with more severity than usual. I told him, that if
+God, in His infinite mercy, spared him, yet he was not secure from just
+punishment from the friends of those whom he had wronged, and that the
+human vengeance, which had been so long postponed, would surely come. He
+looked at me with malice in his small gray eyes (not his mother's eyes),
+and, when I ceased speaking, raised both hands to heaven, and, with the
+most horrible blasphemy, called down its curses upon me; and then he
+swore, that if I crossed his path, or thwarted his plans, or refused him
+money, he would kill me.
+
+"Just before he uttered this monstrous threat, I sprang from my chair
+with horror, and caught him imploringly by both hands. I would have
+saved him from that dreadful act, but I was too late. I saw him wrench
+away his right hand, and raise it to strike me back.... I knew no more,
+until Mrs. Frump, my niece, who has had charge of my household during
+the past three years, entered the room, and found me stretched
+insensible on the floor."
+
+"I saw a part of the sad scene," said Marcus Wilkeson, who had listened
+with mingled indignation and compassion to this strange tale. "Your son
+was standing by that window, and you were sitting near him, also within
+sight of me. I distinctly saw you catch your son's hands with your own;
+he wrenched the right one away, and raised it; then you fell, but he did
+not strike you, or attempt to. As you dropped to the floor, he glanced
+anxiously through the window, saw me watching him, and then pulled down
+the curtain."
+
+"Then he did not strike me to the floor! I never believed he did, for
+there was no bruise or other mark upon my head. Thank God, my son was
+spared the commission of that crime! Bad as he is, he would not strike
+his own father." And the poor old gentleman's heart found meagre
+comfort, for a moment, in that thought.
+
+"A few words more, and I am done. The shock brought my disease to a
+crisis. For over a month my recovery was doubtful. But my naturally
+tough constitution, skilful medical attendance, and the unceasing care
+of Mrs. Frump, brought me safely out of it. The devotion of that good,
+light-hearted woman was truly affecting. She never left my bedside,
+night or day, except for a few hours' rest; and even to-day, when, as
+you see, I am well enough to sit up and talk, and, in fact, am perfectly
+restored to health, it was only by almost pushing her into the street
+that I could get her to go out for a day's shopping--a luxury which the
+good soul had denied to herself during all my illness."
+
+("I must tell Maltboy about this excellent woman," thought Marcus,)
+
+"My son did not come near my sickbed, and I have not seen him since that
+unhappy day. He has visited the house daily, and shut himself in his
+room for several hours. How he occupies his time, I cannot imagine, but
+am sure that it is only in studying or practising evil."
+
+"Possibly I may throw some light on that mystery," said Marcus. "I have
+seen him, from my convenient window, enter his room, day after day,
+generally in the afternoon, sit down at his table, and write for over an
+hour steadily."
+
+"That is strange!" exclaimed the old gentleman. "He has given up the
+study of law. He has no taste for literary labor. He writes a beautiful
+hand, and would not waste time in trying to improve his penmanship. It
+is singular, indeed."
+
+"His work, whatever it is, does not seem to satisfy him; for I have
+observed that he no sooner fills a page with writing, than he burns it
+to ashes by the gas jet, which he always keeps faintly lighted above
+his head."
+
+"Some more villany, I am sure," said the old gentleman, with a deep
+sigh. "We shall find it out by its terrible consequences, in due time.
+He has plenty of leisure to cultivate his vices, but not a moment to
+seek my forgiveness (which, God knows, I would freely grant, if he would
+only ask it). He cannot even throw away a word upon Mrs. Frump, to find
+out whether his own father is dead or alive."
+
+The last thought gave acute pain to the wretched parent. Tears again
+sprang to his eyes, and Marcus feared that he was about to witness that
+saddest sight in nature--an old man weeping.
+
+But, by an effort, Mr. Van Quintem stifled his emotion, and, turning
+suddenly upon his visitor, cried, in a voice of despair:
+
+"Tell me, sir, in Heaven's name, what _shall I_ do with my son?"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+THE YOUNG MONSTER.
+
+From boyhood, it had been Marcus Wilkeson's fortune (or the reverse) to
+attract confidence, and to be sought out for advice. And it had most
+generally happened that he was requested to bestow the last valuable
+article in cases where inexperience absolutely disqualified him from
+giving it.
+
+He had found, however, that, when people ask for advice, they expect to
+receive it, although they reserve to themselves the right, and, in
+ninety-nine cases out of a hundred, exercise the privilege, of
+rejecting it.
+
+But Marcus had gathered, from the old gentleman's story, that the error
+of his dealings with the rebellious son lay in his constantly seeking
+advice from everybody, and taking it, too, instead of adopting some
+firm, consistent, and independent course of his own toward that unfilial
+monster. Furthermore, Marcus knew that the son was already beyond the
+reach of reform. For the future peace of his venerable friend, and for
+the good of society, he could have conscientiously recommended
+two things:
+
+First, the immediate hanging of Myndert Van Quintem, jr. Second, his
+imprisonment for life in a penitentiary warranted to be strong enough
+to hold him.
+
+Neither of these courses being practicable until that young man had
+entitled himself to the benefit of one or the other of them in the
+legitimate way, Marcus Wilkeson had nothing to offer, and so he told the
+old gentleman.
+
+Mr. Van Quintem was disappointed. He looked up wistfully, and said:
+
+"Can't you suggest something?"
+
+Thus appealed to, Marcus angled in the deep waters of his mind, and
+fished up this inadequate idea:
+
+"Let him travel a couple of years in Europe."
+
+"I have proposed it," returned the old gentleman, "but he won't, unless
+I give him five thousand dollars, and an unlimited letter of credit.
+This I refused. Besides, to tell the truth, I do not wish to exile the
+boy, but to reform him at home."
+
+Marcus was too polite to say bluntly that that was impossible; so he
+cast in his line again at random, and drew out this worthless
+suggestion:
+
+"Stop all his pocket money, and tell him plainly that you will
+disinherit him unless he reforms."
+
+"My dear sir," replied the old gentleman, "that might do with some sons,
+but not with mine. He would obtain money by theft, or even a worse
+crime, and bring disgrace upon my gray hairs. He might go even
+farther--for he has threatened it, as I told you--and murder me in
+revenge. Besides, he is on short allowance now. I give him only thirty
+dollars a week--less than a quarter of what he used to receive from me.
+Much as his conduct deserves punishment, I could not reduce him to
+beggary, you know."
+
+This useless discussion was cut short by the precipitate entrance of the
+subject of it. Mr. Van Quintem was greatly surprised at the sudden
+apparition, and his face exhibited signs first of astonishment, then of
+indignation, then of pleasure, in quick succession. But before his
+erring son Had advanced halfway toward the father's chair, the father
+turned his head slightly away, as if not daring to trust himself to an
+interview.
+
+The son took one sharp survey of Marcus, and then slipped his right hand
+insinuatingly in that of his father, which hung over an arm of the easy
+chair. Mr. Van Quintem turned his face farther away, but Marcus observed
+that his fingers closed upon the hand which lay within them.
+
+"Are you quite well, my dear father?" asked the son, in a low, hollow
+voice, not meant to be overheard by the visitor.
+
+"I am, thanks to God, and the doctor, and my niece," said the father,
+stealing a side look at his son.
+
+"And no thanks to me, I know that. I feared, my dear father, after what
+had occurred, that you could not bear the sight of me. Therefore I kept
+away from your bedside."
+
+"That is a lame excuse, Myndert," replied the father. He spoke in a
+voice intended to be audible to Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+A gleam in the son's sunken eyes, and a new pallor on his bloated
+cheeks, indicated his displeasure at the turn which this conversation
+was taking. He withdrew his hand, and said, in a deep whisper:
+
+"I did not think you would quarrel with me, when I called to
+congratulate you on your recovery."
+
+Mr. Van Quintem wavered a moment. Then, looking at the calm face of
+Marcus Wilkeson, as if to gather strength from it, he replied:
+
+"My son, such language is not respectful to your father. You know, as
+God knows, that I have been too indulgent with you."
+
+The son coolly twirled the ends of his mustache--which protruded from
+each side of his mouth like the antennae of a catfish--and gazed
+impudently in his father's face. Then he turned about, and bestowed
+another scornful, analyzing look on the tranquil Marcus.
+
+"That is a friend of mine, Myndert, and I have no secrets from him. Mr.
+Wilkeson--my son."
+
+Marcus politely rose, and offered his hand to the young man, who
+accepted it reluctantly.
+
+"I have seen you before, I believe," said he. "Across the way, eh?"
+
+"I dare say," was the reply. "I sometimes sit at the window, reading."
+
+Myndert then abruptly faced his fatherland Marcus resumed his chair.
+
+"Since you have no secrets from this gentleman," said the son, "allow me
+to ask if you could conveniently spare five hundred dollars
+this morning?"
+
+The old gentleman hesitated; then reassured himself by an observation of
+Marcus Wilkeson's face, and said:
+
+"No, my son; I can no longer encourage this extravagance. Where is your
+last monthly allowance?"
+
+"Gone, of course," answered the son, in a loud and insolent tone. "Do
+you expect to keep me on miserable driblets like that?"
+
+"Thirty dollars a week, and board and lodging, are enough for any
+reasonable young man, Myndert. I cannot give you more."
+
+The son glared on his father and Marcus Wilkeson (holding the latter
+chiefly responsible for the refusal) with amazement.
+
+"Since you are obstinate, then, make it three hundred." The son had
+often been able to obtain half or two thirds of what he originally
+asked, as a compromise.
+
+Again the old gentleman wavered; and it was not until he had looked
+Marcus Wilkeson straight in the eye, that he answered, striking the arm
+of the chair with his thin white hand:
+
+"Not one cent!"
+
+The tumid cheeks assumed a sicklier white, and the small, offensive eyes
+sparkled with a fiercer fury, as the son replied:
+
+"Very well, sir. Be as stingy as you please. Take the advice of your new
+friend here, and cut off my beggarly monthly allowance, too. But
+remember, I must have money, and I will have it!"
+
+Had Marcus Wilkeson not been present, the father might have been brought
+to terms by this vague but dreadful threat. But now he shook his head,
+as an intimation that nothing could move him.
+
+"You have taken your own course, sir," continued the son, through his
+closed teeth. "I shall take mine. Don't forget my last words. As for
+you, sir," turning to Marcus Wilkeson, "we shall probably meet again."
+
+Marcus urbanely responded that nothing could give him greater pleasure.
+The son, darting a last malignant look at his father, whose face was
+happily averted, strode out of the room, slamming the door, and
+afterward the street door, with increased emphasis.
+
+When he had gone, the father said to his visitor, feebly:
+
+"Have I done right?"
+
+"Precisely. Your conduct was firm, prudent, and will have a good
+effect."
+
+"I hope so--I hope so. But don't you think, now, I was a little too
+severe--to begin with, I mean? I fear that my son will be driven to
+crime; and that would kill me."
+
+"I regard his threats as only empty words," replied Marcus. He has found
+them useful heretofore, and he tries them now. Having learned that they
+do not longer frighten you, he will never employ them again. That is one
+point gained. If he is really bad enough to commit a crime for money,
+your misjudged kindness will not prevent him, but will rather encourage
+his evil disposition."
+
+"There is truth in what you say," replied the old gentleman, faintly;
+"but I--I--fear."
+
+The protracted conversation, and the suppressed agony of the past few
+minutes, were too much for the old gentleman to bear on his first day of
+convalescence. He suddenly turned very pale, and his head drooped.
+Marcus threw open a window, and held the cordial to his lips. As Marcus
+was applying this restorative, without any perceptible benefit, the door
+opened, and Mrs. Frump ran in, red in the face, and quite out of breath.
+
+"Excuse me, sir. I am Mrs. Frump, Mr. Van Quintem's niece."
+
+"I am Mr. Wilkeson, a friend of Mr. Van Quintem," said Marcus, hastily
+introducing himself; "and I am glad you are come."
+
+"Yes, I see. Fainted away. Revive in a moment. Fresh air. Cordial, Quite
+right. Now a little water on his forehead."
+
+Mrs. Frump made her sentences short, to accommodate her breath.
+
+As she passed a cool sponge across the patient's brow, she said:
+
+"I knew it would be so. He has been here. I saw him round the corner.
+Looking pale and mad."
+
+"You are right, madam. He _has_ been here."
+
+Mrs. Frump's pleasant little eyes shone with unnatural anger, and there
+was a presage of wrathful words in her quivering lips. Mrs. Frump was
+desperately trying to keep back certain private opinions that she had
+long entertained, but proved unequal to the effort. She burst out with:
+
+"He's an undutiful son, sir. A monster, sir. And he's killing his poor
+father. He's--"
+
+"Ah! what?" said Mr. Van Quintem, opening his eyes, and looking wildly
+around, like one who wakes from a horrible dream.
+
+"It's I. Your niece--Gusty," replied Mrs. Frump, changing her assumed
+harsh tones into her natural soft ones "And I think you had better go to
+bed. Please take hold, Mr. Wilkeson, and assist him to the next room."
+She added, in a whisper, "Don't talk with him any more to-day."
+
+Mr. Wilkeson nodded, raised his eyebrows to signify that he appreciated
+the advice, and proceeded at once to aid Mrs. Frump in her benevolent
+task. The old gentleman had considerably revived by this time.
+
+"You are right, my dear Gusty," said he, looking fondly at his niece.
+"You are always right. And you are right, too, sir," he added, turning
+to Marcus. "Ah, if I had known such a good adviser years ago."
+
+Marcus, remembering Mrs. Frump's injunction, made no answer to this
+remark.
+
+When the old gentleman had been led tottering into the adjacent parlor,
+which was fitted up as his bedroom, and placed comfortably on a high
+prop of pillows, Marcus drew out his watch, made an amiable pretence of
+very important business down town, and bade his venerable friend
+"good-by."
+
+"I had hoped you could stay longer; for I feel that you are a true
+friend, and I can confide my sorrows to you," murmured the old
+gentleman, taking his guest fondly by the hand.
+
+But Marcus, fortified by another significant look from Mrs. Frump,
+declared that business was imperative, and he must go. He would call
+to-morrow, without fail, and hoped to find his friend as cheerful as a
+cricket. The old gentleman smiled at the absurdity of that hope, and
+said he should depend on seeing him to-morrow.
+
+So, shaking hands warmly with Mr. Van Quintem, and bowing most
+respectfully to Mrs. Frump, Marcus took his departure, and meditated, as
+he walked slowly home, on the strange occurrences of the day.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+WESLEY TIFFLES.
+
+One evening, shortly after the events narrated in the last chapter, the
+three bachelors, having finished dinner, and escaped from the grim
+presence of Miss Philomela Wilkeson, took their accustomed seats and
+pipes in the little back parlor. The curtains were drawn, the gas was
+lighted, the fire burning brightly, and, upon these outward tokens of
+cheer, the three bachelors reflected contentment and happiness from
+their six eyes. In his own opinion, each of the three had unlimited
+cause to be happy; and not even that killjoy of the household, Miss
+Wilkeson, could mar the completeness of their felicity--when she was
+not present.
+
+Fayette Overtop was blessed with the thought, that in Mrs. Slapman he
+had found, at last, that rare bird for which he had patiently hunted
+through the valleys and uplands of society--"a sensible woman." The
+intellectual sympathy which was enkindled between them on the memorable
+occasion of their first meeting, had grown warmer at each successive
+interview--first at a supper party, second at a _conversazione_, and
+third at a private theatrical and musical entertainment, to all of which
+Mr. Overtop had been invited, with the particular compliments of the
+liberal hostess.
+
+During this pleasant acquaintance, Mr. Overtop had made the
+extraordinary discovery that Mrs. Slapman was married, and that the thin
+little man whom he saw dodging up the stairs on New Year's day was
+her husband.
+
+It would be difficult to explain, on behalf of Mr. Overtop, a phenomenon
+which Mr. Overtop was never able to explain to the satisfaction of the
+gossip-loving public, or of his best friends. We therefore content
+ourselves with merely stating the fact, that Mr. Overtop's admiration
+for Mrs. Slapman was purely intellectual; that he was fascinated by her
+vivacious intellect, and not by her substantial person; by the charm of
+her manners, and not of her face. He looked upon Mrs. Slapman as a
+masculine mind and soul, of uncommon depth, made powerfully magnetic by
+its enshrinement in a feminine form. Overtop once told Matthew Maltboy,
+that he knew, in his own experience, the meaning of Platonic love. But
+Matthew, who was a sad materialist even in his sentimental moods,
+laughed at him, and winked. Overtop positively felt hurt at this unkind
+reception of his confidences, and never again alluded to the state of
+his feelings toward Mrs. Slapman, until subsequent occurrences made it
+necessary in self-defence.
+
+With Mr. Slapman he was not personally acquainted; but he had
+ascertained privately, from a musical frequenter of the house, who
+invariably brought his flute with him, and who was understood to be the
+oldest friend of the family, that Mr. Slapman owned a large property in
+wild land in Pennsylvania, not a hundred miles from New York; that he
+was improving it, and selling it out in building lots, and had already
+cleared a handsome fortune; that he was a strict business man, and
+looked after his affairs in person, passing between New York and
+Slapmansville (the name of the new settlement) twice a week, and
+spending the larger part of his time at the latter place. Also that,
+next to avarice, which was his crowning trait, his chief fault was
+jealousy. It galled him to think that his wife had obtained a settlement
+in bank from him before marriage, which enabled her to indulge her
+tastes for society; and it enraged him still more to observe how much
+she was loved and admired by others, when he had purchased her
+exclusively for his private love and admiration. He it was who was to be
+sometimes seen stalking through the parlors with a pale face, or running
+up and down the front staircase in a state of great nervous agitation.
+None of Mrs. Slapman's visitors had the pleasure of his personal
+acquaintance; and it was considered a point of good breeding not to
+allude to him in her presence.
+
+For this misguided man Fayette Overtop felt a real pity. He yearned to
+expostulate with him gently, as a friend. Taking Mr. Slapman's hand in
+his own, he would have said:
+
+"Your wife is a precious gift to the world. Seek not to check the
+outflow of her ardent nature. Thank Heaven that you are the custodian of
+such a treasure, not to be selfishly monopolized by yourself, but held
+in trust for the benefit of society."
+
+Overtop's meditations, on this particular occasion, pertained to the
+style of the costume which would most become him as the lover of Mrs.
+Slapman, in an original play to be enacted at her house toward the close
+of the week. The question was chiefly of knee breeches. Overtop was
+mentally debating whether he ought not, in justice to his thin legs, to
+substitute an ampler style of integuments.
+
+Matthew Maltboy had also been invited to this _soiree dramatique_ (as
+Mrs. Slapman's large pasteboards expressed it). A fat man was a
+necessity of the play. Mrs. Slapman was not cordial to Matthew,
+regarding him as an excessively commonplace person, and had invited him
+to her social gatherings out of courtesy to Overtop; but her artist eye
+saw in him a fitness for the fat man. Matthew was delighted with the
+implied compliment to those talents for the stage which every man
+supposes himself to possess in some degree, and cheerfully undertook
+the part.
+
+The proprieties of costume did not in the least perplex Mr. Maltboy, as
+he lay on the sofa digesting his dinner, and puffing out smoke rings by
+the dozen. His thoughts were mildly fixed on that delightful Miss
+Whedell. Five times he had been graciously permitted to visit the lady
+at her house, and to discover a score of new charms at each interview. A
+large experience in love making assured him that the object of his
+idolatry was not wholly indifferent to him. The paternal Whedell had
+hobbies. Matthew had studied them, like a skilful strategist, catered to
+them, and felt quite sure that he had that revered individual on his
+side. But, in the midst of these pleasant imaginings, there rose the
+dark and baleful image of Chiffield!
+
+Marcus Wilkeson was also pondering--pleasantly, if one might judge from
+the contented smile upon his lips. The subject of his thoughts was one
+which, for reasons that seemed good to him, he still kept secret from
+his fellow bachelors. He had freely told them of his singular adventure
+at the house of the old gentleman opposite; but not a word of the
+inventor and his daughter, and of the private school at Miss Pillbody's.
+Not even the minute and sometimes tedious accounts which Overtop and
+Maltboy gave of their private thoughts and experiences, could induce
+Marcus to reciprocate their confidence. For the first time in his life
+he wore a mask before his companions, and prevaricated, and became, on a
+small scale, a humbug.
+
+The sharp ringing of the doorbell broke in upon the quiet reflections of
+the three bachelors. Mash, the cook, who was at that moment reading the
+fifteenth chapter of "The Buttery and the Boudoir: A Tale of Real Life,"
+in her favorite weekly, threw down the paper in a passion, bounded up
+stairs, and admitted John Wesley Tiffles, or Wesley Tiffles, as he
+always subscribed himself on promissory notes and other worthless paper.
+Mr. Tiffles chucked Mash familiarly under the chin (resented with a
+scornful look by Mash, who had learned from "The Buttery and the
+Boudoir" to set a proper value on herself), and then walked straight to
+the parlor, like one who knew he was a welcome guest.
+
+And he was right. For when he opened the door, and disclosed to the
+three bachelors the well-known laughing eyes, hopeful face, and spare
+figure of Wesley Tiffles, they hailed him with enthusiasm. He was a
+walking cure for despondency, although he sometimes charged too high, in
+the shape of borrowed money, for his professional services. But neither
+of the three bachelors had yet sustained that pecuniary tax which Wesley
+Tiffles always levied upon his friends, just before leaving them
+forever. They formed a part of his reserve corps, which had latterly
+been sadly thinned out in Mr. Tiffles's desperate contest with
+the world.
+
+Mr. Tiffles shook hands with Marcus Wilkeson, giving him the grip of
+some unknown Order, slapped Overtop on the back, and playfully pulled
+the whiskers of Maltboy. Then he filled a pipe, threw himself into a
+chair, adjusted his legs in the true form of a compass, and opened his
+coat ostentatiously. All this in about ten seconds, and with a geniality
+that defied reproof. He was the very embodiment of cheer.
+
+"Prepare to be astonished," said Mr. Tiffles, after his third whiff. "I
+have a splendid idea." The three bachelors smiled, and nodded an
+intimation that they were prepared,
+
+"I have had some impracticable notions in my time; but this _is_ good,
+and you'll say so. You know that dog, Mark, two doors below--the large
+yellow one, with cropped ears, and a tail like the handle of a
+shaving brush?"
+
+Mr. Wilkeson replied that he had the pleasure of the animal's
+acquaintance,
+
+"Well, as I was passing the dog's house on my way here, I slipped in the
+snow. The dog, always on the alert for victims, took a mean advantage of
+my situation, and jumped after me through the open gate. I scrambled to
+my feet, but not before he had fastened his teeth in my right leg----"
+
+"Good heavens! was he mad?" cried Overtop, who had a horror of dogs, and
+made wide circuits about them in the street.
+
+"Can't say as to that," replied Wesley Tiffles, "but advise you to keep
+shy of him for the future, I was about to say that he bit me through the
+leg of my trowsers. And on that very instant, as if by inspiration, I
+caught--not the hydrophobia, but a magnificent idea. Having got on my
+pins, I kicked the dog into his front yard, and immediately worked the
+idea into shape. You'll be sure to like it."
+
+Marcus Wilkeson, speaking for self and friends, said he had no doubt of
+that. Mr. Tiffles's ideas always possessed the merit of novelty.
+
+"That means that they have no other merit!" returned Tiffles, laughing,
+"Very true of most of them, I confess all my failures. But here is an
+idea which even you, skeptic as you are, will grant to be not only
+novel, but great. You have all observed, gentlemen, the immense
+differences in dogs. There are white, black, brown, gray, yellow (like
+our suggestive canine friend two doors below), tan-colored,
+mouse-colored, striped, and spotted dogs. There are round dogs, square
+dogs, long dogs, short dogs, tall dogs, and low dogs. There are
+full-grown dogs that weigh less than a pound, and others that kick the
+beam at a hundred pounds. There are dogs that are pretty much all tail,
+and there are dogs that have no tail to speak of. Among all the dogs
+that you meet in the street, do you ever see two exactly alike?"
+
+Fayette Overtop, who spoke from extensive and minute observation,
+unhesitatingly said "No."
+
+"True! Nature never repeats herself in dogs. In so doing, Nature works
+directly for my benefit, as I will show you. Now, in the second place,
+as you are probably aware, there is an ordinance forbidding unmuzzled
+dogs to run in the streets during the hot months--"
+
+"An excellent law," interrupted Overtop.
+
+"If caught at large without muzzles, they are taken to the public pound,
+and, unless redeemed by the owners within twenty-four hours, are drowned
+in a tub--"
+
+"Serve 'em right," remarked the hydrophobiac bachelor.
+
+"Now, I am _slightly_ acquainted with some members of the Common
+Council" (he laid emphasis on the word "slightly," to imply that he was
+on terms of the closest intimacy with them), "and can easily obtain from
+them the privilege of catching all the stray dogs, and taking them out
+of the country next summer."
+
+"Which would be very benevolent to the dogs; and, regarded from their
+point of view, your idea is a noble one," thoughtfully observed Marcus
+Wilkeson. "But I don't, at this moment, exactly see how you are
+benefited by it."
+
+Mr. Tiffles smiled with the consciousness of power, and chidingly said:
+
+"You are dull this morning, Mark--quite dull. Strike, but hear! In a
+word, then, I propose to exhibit two or three hundred of these dogs, in
+some country where there are _no_ dogs. I would give them strange names,
+put them in cages, and call them the 'American Menagerie of Trained
+Animals.' A person who had never seen dogs, would suppose each one to be
+a different species from the others--just as the lion, the tiger, and
+the leopard are different, though all belonging to the one cat family.
+Now, there is my idea. What do you think of it? Of course, you laugh,
+at first."
+
+Roars of laughter from the three bachelors had formed the chorus of
+"Wesley Tiffles's closing sentences. Marcus Wilkeson, as became his age,
+was the first to recover himself.
+
+"The idea is a splendid one. None better. But there is one slight
+difficulty in the way. Where are you to find your country that has no
+dogs? If there were such a happy land on the face of this earth, Overtop
+would have hunted it up long ago, and moved there."
+
+Overtop laughingly replied, "That's so." He then informed Mr. Tiffles,
+while admitting the theoretical excellence of his idea, that every
+nation had its dogs as well as its fleas. Those two friends of man were
+impartially distributed over the terrestrial globe. Overtop referred to
+the standard Cyclopaedias, and several works on Natural History, in
+proof of his assertion.
+
+"Can't be! can't be!" retorted Wesley Tiffles, who was at first disposed
+to defend his brilliant idea. But brilliant ideas were a common growth
+of his fertile mind, and, like all things easily produced, he held them
+cheaply. The moment that evidence, or the test of practice, showed them
+to be fallacious, he gave them up, and drew upon his brain for others.
+So, after a second's reflection, he added:
+
+"Perhaps you are right. Dogs are not exactly in my line, after all. But
+the idea, as an idea, was magnificent."
+
+As Wesley Tiffles spoke, he repeated the act, for the twentieth time, of
+throwing back his overcoat (a little seedy), and opening his vest, as if
+to draw attention to his shirt front, whose natural whiteness was toned
+down by a delicate neutral tint. Immediately afterward, he placed his
+hand on a small breastpin in the centre of the shirt front, and turned
+it to the right and left. It sparkled for the first time in the rays of
+the fire, and revealed to the experienced eyes of the three bachelors
+simultaneously, that Wesley Tiffles was the wearer of a real diamond.
+
+"Excuse me," said Marcus Wilkeson, who divined that Tiffles wished his
+diamond to be remarked upon, "but that is pretty!"
+
+"Pretty! What?" said Tiffles, looking about the room.
+
+"That diamond."
+
+"Oh! the diamond. Perhaps you would like to look at it?" (hands it round
+for inspection). "Cost forty dollars. Rather a hard draw on my
+exchequer" (that was Mr. Tiffles's word for a friend's pocket); "but I
+considered it a most judicious investment for a young man just going
+into business."
+
+The novelty of this idea was not lost on Fayette Overtop. "Pray explain,
+Tiffles," said he.
+
+"Cheerfully," said Tiffles, replacing the gem in his shirt front, after
+it had been duly handled and admired. "Nobody will acknowledge that he
+is taken in by a diamond. He will say, 'Anybody can buy a diamond, by
+saving up thirty or forty dollars; and why should I believe a man to be
+rich who wears one?' Yet, in his heart of hearts, he does believe it,
+unless the possessor of the diamond has the bad taste to dress flashily.
+Then he passes for an impostor, and people will doubt, even against
+their own senses, the genuineness of the stone. But let him dress
+plainly, as I do," continued Mr. Tiffles, stroking down the left leg of
+his black trowsers, shiny with wear, "and that little diamond shall
+stand, in the eyes of the whole world, as the representative of a fat
+bank account, a brown stone house, and a couple of corner lots."
+
+Marcus and Matthew laughed, but Fayette Overtop, who absolutely revelled
+in paradoxes, said, "True, Tiffles, true!"
+
+"Don't think," pursued Tiffles, "that I expected to impose on you with
+it. You know that I am a poor devil, living on my wits." (Tiffles was
+delightfully frank with his intimate acquaintances.) "I hold out this
+glittering bait, not for my friends, but for my old foe and natural
+enemy, the world. You must know that I am on the eve of a grand
+speculation--probably the grandest I have ever undertaken."
+
+"Another plan of advertising with large kites by day, and pictorial
+lanterns attached to their tails at night?" asked Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"Or another Submarine Pneumatic Parcel-Delivering Tube to Brooklyn?"
+asked Matthew Maltboy.
+
+"Or an Association for the Cultivation of Mushrooms in Dark Cellars?"
+asked Fayette Overtop.
+
+"Capital hits!" replied Wesley Tiffles, who took an unfeigned delight in
+a friendly allusion to his failures. "But allow me to inform you
+definitely, that those unfortunate speculations are not to be revived.
+Like the lightning, I don't strike twice in the same place. No; the
+project upon which I am now engaged is one so eminently practical, so
+free from all that is visionary, that you will wonder how I thought of
+it. That project is a PANORAMA OF AFRICA!"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+THE PANORAMA OF AFRICA
+
+The three bachelors concurred in the opinion that the idea was a good
+one; but Marcus Wilkeson suggested that the field was too large.
+
+"I thought you would like the general proposition," said Tiffles. "But,
+bless you, Mark! I don't mean to paint the whole continent, from stem to
+stern, so to speak; only the undiscovered part of Central Africa--say
+from Cape Guardafui on the east to the Bight of Benin on the west."
+
+"But how the deuce," asked Matthew Maltboy, "are you, or anybody else,
+going to paint what has not been discovered?"
+
+Tiffles could hardly suppress a smile at the simplicity of the question.
+"Why," said he, "that's easy enough. Don't all the geographers tell us
+that the interior of Africa is made up, so far as known, of alternate
+deserts and jungles, like the patches on a coverlet? Very well. I
+conform to this general principle of the continent. I put half of the
+canvas in desert, and the rest in jungle, and I can't be far out of the
+way. Take the idea?"
+
+"Perfectly," said Matthew Maltboy; "but if you have nothing but
+alternate, deserts and jungles, it strikes me your panorama will be a
+little monotonous. Perhaps I am wrong." (Maltboy always offered
+suggestions timidly.)
+
+"I have thought of that, and guarded against it. I shall fill the
+jungles with animated life--elephants, lions, tigers, panthers,
+leopards, rhinoceroses, hippopotamuses, giraffes, zebras, crocodiles,
+boa constrictors, and other specimens of natural history indigenous to
+that delightful region."
+
+"Good!" cried Overtop; "and if you will take a hint from me, you will
+show your elephants in the act of being caught by natives, or engaged in
+combats with each other; your lions fighting your tigers or your
+rhinoceroses; your hippopotamuses engaged in death struggles with your
+crocodiles; and your boa constrictors gobbling down your natives--or, if
+that is objectionable on the score of humanity, your monkeys."
+
+"Thank you for the hint; but the expense, and the necessity of
+completing the panorama at an early day, put it out of the question. To
+paint accurate representations of these animals engaged in their
+innocent sports, would occupy the time of a first-class artist for
+months, and cost an enormous sum."
+
+"Ah, I see," interrupted Overtop, who liked to show that he snatched the
+meaning; "you will put your animals in recumbent attitudes--sleeping,
+perhaps, in the depth of jungles, shaded from the fierce rays of the
+equatorial sun."
+
+"You have guessed it," said Tiffles, with a broad smile. "Most of them
+will be just there--out of sight. The others will be suggested rather
+than introduced. Elephants will be signified by their trunks appearing
+above the tops of the dense undergrowth. Lions, tigers, and other
+quadrupeds, by the tips of their tails. A boa constrictor will be
+expressed by a head, a coil, and a bit of tail showing at intervals. The
+one horn of the rhinoceros will always tell where _he_ is. I shall have
+two small lakes (they are scarce in Africa) for my hippopotamuses and
+crocodiles. If they exhibit only small portions of their heads above the
+surface, that is not my fault. It is the nature of the beasts,
+you know."
+
+"Ha! ha! That is what I call Art concealing Art," said Overtop.
+
+"So it is," returned Tiffles; "and it will be appreciated, I doubt not,
+by those who affect the school of Severe Simplicity in painting."
+
+"One thing more," said Marcus Wilkeson. "Do you intend to take the
+panorama through the country, and lecture on it?"
+
+"I do. And here let me say, that I read up the law of false pretences
+long ago. I shall style myself Professor Wesley on the bills. That I
+have a right to do, as my full name doesn't look well in type. Actors
+and singers do the same thing every day. I shall call myself a great
+traveller. This is strictly true. I have been North to Boston, West to
+Detroit, and South to Baltimore. I shall not say that I have been in
+Africa, or that the sketches were taken on the spot. If my audience
+choose to infer _that_, that is their business. If any one doubts the
+accuracy of my panorama, I can say triumphantly, 'Prove it!'"
+
+"Excellent, but a little risky," said Marcus Wilkeson, who could not
+help admiring the audacity of the plan. "Your next great difficulty will
+be to satisfy audiences after you have got them together, as I dare say
+you will, by some brilliant system of advertising. I have heard--perhaps
+you have--of audiences breaking furniture, smashing chandeliers, and
+tarring and feathering people."
+
+"All that has been thought of," was the reply. "Before I leave the city,
+I shall give a private exhibition of the panorama to a few ministers of
+various denominations, in the lecture room of some up-town church.
+Ministers, you know, are debarred by their profession from attending the
+opera and theatres, and will catch at the chance to see a panorama for
+nothing. In private life, they are capital people, as a class--I have
+known several of them--and will willingly certify that the panorama is a
+highly moral, instructive, and interesting exhibition. I think I can
+rely on my persuasive powers for that much. These certificates I shall
+print on my posters and handbills. They will draw moral audiences. Moral
+audiences do not break furniture, &c., &c. Comprehend my line of
+argument?"
+
+"Perfectly," said Marcus; "and very ingenious, _as_ an argument."
+
+"I thought you would like it. And now, to drop the subject, I want you
+three fellows to come up to my rooms, No. 121, third floor, Bartholomew
+Buildings, Broadway--you remember--and see this great work of art, early
+next week."
+
+"Is it nearly finished?" asked Marcus.
+
+"Yes--in my mind's eye. That is the main thing. The painting has not yet
+been begun. It will be a very simple matter. The canvas will be about
+four hundred feet long. One half of it will be a dead level of yellow
+paint, for desert; and the rest, perpendicular stripes of green paint,
+for jungle. A good artist, with a whitewash brush and two tubsful of
+paint, ought to do up the whole panorama in two days. The heads and
+tails of animated life, the two small lakes, and a few other objects of
+interest, such as the sun, the moon, birds flying in the air, &c., could
+be put in afterward by an artist of higher grade. And, by the way, now I
+think of it, I may as well open with a sunrise off Cape Guardafui, and a
+distant view of the Straits of Babel Mandel, give a passing glance at
+the sources of the Nile, which lie in that undiscovered region, a brief
+glimpse at the Mountains of the Moon, and wind up with a splendid sunset
+in the Bight of Benin. It--"
+
+Mr. Tiffles's observations were cut short by the sudden entrance of Miss
+Philomela Wilkeson. She shot rapidly into the room, but, when her eyes
+rested on Mr. Tiffles, she recoiled with maiden modesty, and stepped
+back as if to beat a retreat. Then, recovering her self-possession in a
+small measure, she stepped forward again, and said, in the blandest of
+tones, with just the least virgin coyness:
+
+"I thought perhaps I had left my scissors here this afternoon."
+
+Messrs. Wilkeson, Overtop, and Maltboy asserted, without rising from
+their seats, that they had not seen her scissors, and doubted very much
+whether the scissors were in that room. But Wesley Tiffles, who was the
+most polite and obliging of mortals when there was a lady in the case,
+rose respectfully upon her entrance, and insisted upon searching the
+apartment for the missing tool.
+
+Miss Wilkeson, thus being placed under obligations to Mr. Tiffles, was
+compelled to take personal cognizance of him, which she did with the
+nearest approach to a blush that she was ever known to make. "I beg,
+sir, that you will not trouble yourself. I--I do not think the scissors
+are here, after all."
+
+"That can be ascertained only by searching, miss," replied Tiffles. Then
+he glided about the room in his own nimble fashion, looking behind the
+two vases on the mantelpiece, raking over the littered burden of the
+table in the corner, and peering and poking into every place where there
+was the least likelihood of finding a stray pair of scissors; Miss
+Wilkeson all the while deprecating any further search.
+
+Mr. Tiffles suddenly stopped, like a dragonfly in the midst of his
+angular dartings, and said: "Since your scissors are not to be found, it
+is fortunate that I have a pocket pair, which are always at your
+service." Mr. Tiffles produced the ill-omened article, and handed it to
+her. This called out a new lot of thanks, regrets for having troubled
+him, apologies, and a peremptory refusal to take his scissors,
+immediately followed by their acceptance, and a promise that she would
+take the best care of them, and return them to the owner on his
+next visit.
+
+Then was the auspicious moment for Miss Wilkeson to have retired with
+dignity; but she stood at the door, twirling the fatal scissors in her
+hand, and waiting either to say something which did not come
+spontaneously, or to have something said to her.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson saw a subtle motive in this awkward tarrying at the
+door, and, having no objection to gratifying it, he straightway
+introduced Mr. Wesley Tiffles to Miss Philomela Wilkeson. Mr. Tiffles
+put himself into the form of an L, like a professional acrobat; and Miss
+Wilkeson executed a courtesy in the old, exploded style. Then, as if
+appalled at what she had done, she backed into the entry as fast as she
+had come from it.
+
+Mr. Tiffles, upon whom the small events of life made no impression,
+thought no more of Miss Wilkeson that evening, but smoked three pipes,
+told two funny stories, sang one comic song, and then went home, having
+previously exacted from the three bachelors a promise to call at his
+rooms and see at least one half of the panorama completed, on the
+following day week.
+
+Since Miss Wilkeson had been an inmate of that house, she had seen
+Wesley Tiffles perhaps a dozen times, in the entry or on the doorsteps,
+and had been impressed with his gentlemanlike air, his quick black eyes,
+and his deferential manner toward her. Everybody is supposed to have a
+realized ideal somewhere, if he or she could only find it. Such was
+Wesley Tiffles to Philomela Wilkeson. Let it be confessed at once. The
+lost scissors were all the time quietly resting at the bottom of Miss
+Wilkeson's workbag, and she knew it. The prevalent frailty of human
+nature must be her excuse.
+
+She had-obtained not only an introduction to Wesley Tiffles, but a pair
+of scissors which must be returned to him, and were therefore a bond of
+friendship. But Miss Wilkeson forgot the fatality which the proverb
+attaches to gifts or loans of that particular article of cutlery.
+
+
+
+BOOK FIFTH.
+
+MANOEUVRES.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+STOLEN--MOKE THAN A PURSE.
+
+One morning, as Marcus Wilkeson was idly turning the pages of a
+blue-and-gold favorite, the doorbell rang. In accordance with some
+mysterious law of acoustics, the sound was full three minutes descending
+the kitchen staircase, entering the keyhole of the kitchen door, and
+striking on the tympanum of Mash, the cook, who was sitting by the fire,
+reading the twenty-fifth chapter of "The Buttery and the Boudoir: A Tale
+of Real Life." When Mash became fully conscious (which was not till the
+end of the chapter) that the bell had rung, she expelled a sigh from her
+fat chest, and wiped the tears from her eyes with the end of her clean
+apron, and then went to the door with a noble resignation to her lot.
+There she found a stout elderly woman, bearing a note for "Marcus
+Wilkeson, Esq."
+
+"Lor'! how slow you are!" said the stout woman, handing the letter to
+her.
+
+Mash, who had read, in the twenty-third chapter, of the overwhelming way
+in which the heroine cook had answered an insult by dignified silence,
+said not a word in reply, but took the note, and slammed the door in the
+stout woman's face.
+
+The exclamation "Bah!" and certain indistinct mutterings which were
+audible through the panels, convinced Mash that, by her self-denial, she
+had won a moral victory. It was with a feeling of excusable pride that
+she walked into the back parlor, and delivered the note to
+Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"Thank you, Mash," said he. It was a singular illustration of his
+excessive politeness, that he was no less grateful for paid services
+than for free.
+
+Mash retired, thinking to herself that, if Mr. Wilkeson were only a
+pirate, a smuggler, a guerilla chieftain, or a dashing fellow in some
+unlawful, dangerous business, a few years younger, he would be a
+perfect hero.
+
+Marcus did not recognize the handwriting of the address. Tearing open
+the envelope, he read the following lines, hastily scrawled on a bit of
+blue paper:
+
+     Wednesday, A.M.
+
+     MARCUS WILKESON, ESQ.:
+
+     SIR: Please come over and see me immediately. I have
+     something important to communicate.
+
+     Your obedient servant,
+
+     ELIPHALET MINFORD."
+
+"Something must be wrong," said Marcus; and startling thoughts then
+occurred to him. "Has her hard studying brought on illness? It can't be.
+She was well enough last evening. What can be the matter?"
+
+Marcus Wilkeson's temperament was of that unfortunate nervous sort which
+is thrown off its balance by the slightest shock. His frame trembled as
+he put on his overcoat and hat; and, when he looked in the mirror, he
+noticed that his face was paler than usual, and his eyes were glassy.
+"Pooh! what a sensitive fool I am!" said he.
+
+He walked hurriedly to Mr. Minford's, and mounted the long, creaking
+staircases, two steps at a time, tormenting himself all the way with
+vague apprehensions of evil.
+
+When he entered the room, without knocking (as was his custom of late),
+he found the inventor standing in front of his machine, with bare arms,
+hard at work. Marcus nervously said, "Good morning," and stepped forward
+to shake him by the hand, but stopped when he saw that Mr. Minford
+averted his face, and did not move.
+
+"I wished to show you a letter which I received a few minutes ago," said
+the inventor, still not facing Marcus, but busily filing off the rough
+edge of a brass wheel fresh from the mould. "There it is, on the table."
+
+Marcus caught up the letter, and read the following:
+
+     NEW YORK, Wednesday Forenoon.
+
+     MR. MINFORD:
+
+     RESPECTED SIR: Allow a true friend and well wisher to ask a
+     few questions. Who is this Mr. Marcus Wilkeson that has
+     suddenly taken such an interest in your family affairs? What
+     is his private history? Why is he relieving you from all
+     trouble and expense in the education of your beautiful child?
+     What are the man's _real_ motives? Would it not be well to
+     spare your eyes from your invention long enough to look into
+     these matters a little? Pardon the suggestion. The office of
+     a spy, and a secret accuser, is an unpleasant, and, perhaps,
+     a thankless one. I should never have assumed it, but for the
+     fact that your ardent devotion to science may render you the
+     easy dupe--and your daughter the innocent victim--of a
+     designing and heartless man of the world. I do not ask you to
+     believe the writer of an anonymous note, and therefore I make
+     no specific charges against this Wilkeson; but merely ask you
+     to inquire into his private character, and, above all, his
+     MOTIVES, for yourself.
+
+     ONE OF MANY.
+
+Though Marcus Wilkeson was as innocent as a child, in deed and thought,
+of the baseness hinted at in this letter, he felt that he was looking
+guilty. Astonishment and indignation kindled in his eyes; but a flush of
+shame mounted at the same time to his cheeks. Marcus had often said,
+that if he were tapped on the shoulder in the street, and charged with a
+petty theft, he would look guilty of grand larceny until he could regain
+command of his feelings. This diseased sensitiveness, inherited from his
+mother, was the curse of his physical and mental organization.
+
+His shame was increased by a consciousness that the inventor was
+stealthily watching him, and studying the enlargement of those horrid
+red spots on his cheeks.
+
+"When Marcus finished the letter, he put on an expression of outraged
+innocence--which matched poorly with the flaming tokens of
+guilt--and said:
+
+"These are infernal lies, sir; and, if I knew the coward who wrote them,
+I would cram them down his throat."
+
+"Of course they are lies," returned Mr. Minford. "Every anonymous letter
+writer is a liar--until it is proved that he tells the truth. I shall
+believe none of these low aspersions on your honor, Mr. Wilkeson,
+without conclusive evidence." As the inventor said this, not
+emphatically, Marcus saw that he believed all that the letter had
+insinuated.
+
+By this time, Marcus had got his constitutional devil a little under
+control. There was something of real boldness and honesty in his eyes,
+as he answered:
+
+"This is a distressing subject to talk or think of. But now that it has
+been brought before us, I demand a full investigation. Go, wherever you
+will, among those who know me, and inquire into my character. Recall
+everything that has occurred between us since the beginning of our
+acquaintance. Ask your daughter if I have ever spoken a word to her, or
+cast a look at her, which could justify these infamous insinuations.
+Thus much I ask of you, in justice to me."
+
+"And I refuse, sir," said the inventor. "I will not insult you by an
+unworthy suspicion. The world is full of impertinent people, and we can
+no more stop their gabble, than that of swallows in the air. This
+nameless fellow signs himself 'One of Many,' That is probably a lie. But
+if there were thousands like himself prying into your and my affairs, I
+should not care. As for motives, none but fools and misanthropes trouble
+themselves about _them_."
+
+The inventor tossed off the last sentence contemptuously. But Marcus
+knew that he did attach a great importance to motives; although he could
+not fairly be ranked either among the misanthropes or the fools. He
+therefore replied:
+
+"The whole world is welcome to inquire into my motives. As I understand
+them, they are: First, I take pleasure in your society, sir, because,
+like myself, you are a quiet, thinking man. Second, you have a
+hobby--your machine, there--and I admire people with hobbies. Third, I
+am fond of children, and--and--your daughter is a very pleasant,
+intelligent child. Fourth, you have insisted on selling me an interest
+in your invention, in return for a small loan, and that fact would draw
+me here, if nothing else did. These are motives enough to satisfy the
+most inquisitive mind, I should think."
+
+Marcus said this with an attempt at a light laugh. But there was one
+motive not yet confessed--a motive which could hardly be called a
+motive, for it lay dim and half-formed within his brain. He had never,
+in his moments of self-inquisition, acknowledged its existence to
+himself. How could he, then, venture to disclose it to another? It was
+the suppression of this immature motive, that brought back that look of
+deceit and guilt to Marcus Wilkeson's ingenuous face.
+
+This unfortunate physiognomical revelation was not lost upon the keen
+eyes of the inventor. But he said:
+
+"Mr. Wilkeson, let us not say another word on this ridiculous subject. I
+am ashamed of myself for showing you the letter. I ought to have thrown
+it into the fire."
+
+"There I differ with you, my dear sir," said Marcus. "You did perfectly
+right, and I am glad that I have had the opportunity to define my
+position here clearly, once and for all." Marcus could not avoid saying
+this much in mere civility to the inventor, but he indulged the private
+opinion that that gentleman should have burned the anonymous note.
+
+"Who can have written this scoundrelly thing?" continued Marcus,
+turning over the letter, and then the envelope, for the twentieth time
+each, and minutely examining them.
+
+The note was written on a half sheet of common letter paper. The
+manufacturer's stamp in the corner had been cut off, and the size of the
+half sheet further diminished by paring down one of the sides. The
+writing was what is known as "backhanded," in strokes which appeared at
+first sight to be of a uniform lightness. On inspecting it very closely,
+Marcus discovered a tendency, in this backhanded penmanship, to ascend
+from the line; and also that, in a few instances, the downward strokes
+on certain long letters were a trifle thicker than on others. That the
+writing was a man's, Marcus had no doubt, though he would have been
+puzzled to give the reasons which led him to that conclusion. The
+envelope was the ordinary prepaid-stamped one issued by the Government,
+and therefore could not contribute to the identification of the
+anonymous writer. The superscription was in the same backhand, and was
+peculiar in nothing but a small curved nourish, like Hogarth's line of
+beauty, beneath the words, "New York. City."
+
+"The rascal has carefully disguised his hand," said Marcus, "and does
+not mean to be found out. I can say nothing more positive, than that it
+is written by somebody who has never corresponded with me. My memory of
+autographs happens to be pretty tenacious."
+
+"And I am positive that it is written by no acquaintance of mine, or of
+my daughter's, for we have none--except you. As the case now stands, it
+is a mystery, not worth the exploring."
+
+"Again I differ with you," said Marcus. "Whoever wrote this false
+letter, has powerful motives of hostility to me or you, or,
+perhaps--worse still--to your daughter. I must try to smoke him out of
+his hiding place. Meanwhile, I trust, sir, you will see the propriety of
+concealing this unpleasant matter from Miss Minford."
+
+"Certainly, Mr. Wilkeson, certainly. As for myself, it is forever
+dismissed from my mind; and I cannot blame myself sufficiently for
+having troubled you with it." Mr. Minford here proffered his hand, which
+Marcus cordially shook, rejoicing to observe no trace of suspicion in
+the inventor's clear gray eyes.
+
+"Allow me to retain this letter for the present," asked Marcus. "It may
+serve as a clue to the detection of the concealed scoundrel. I also beg
+that you will show me any other anonymous letters of the same character
+that may reach you."
+
+Mr. Minford laughed. "The stove door is the pigeonhole where all such
+nonsense ought to be filed away. But just as you please. If any more
+come to hand, you shall see them. They may amuse you, as they do me.
+Ha! ha!"
+
+Marcus echoed the laugh, but feebly. Then it occurred to him that Pet
+would soon be home, and he felt a strange aversion to meeting her, after
+what had happened. He therefore pleaded a pressing engagement at eleven
+o'clock (which it then was), and took his departure from the inventor's
+roof, but not without a warm and seemingly sincere invitation to
+"call soon."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+CONSOLATIONS OF HIGH ART.
+
+Marcus walked slowly toward Broadway, musing and unhappy. To a man of
+his delicate and hyper-sensitive nature, an event of this kind was a
+vast disturbance. He felt that this anonymous letter was but the
+forerunner of a long series of troubles. That prescience which nervous
+people have of misfortunes portrayed to him a future black with
+disappointments and dangers.
+
+"Hallo, Mark! What's the matter? You look as sad as a low comedian by
+daylight!" Previous to this salutation came a ringing slap on the
+left shoulder.
+
+Marcus rather liked familiarities; but the slap, coming on him when his
+nerves were unstrung, startled him. He turned sharply; but the stern
+and indignant face wreathed into amiable smiles, when he saw that the
+lively gentleman behind him was only Wesley Tiffles. Everybody liked
+Wesley Tiffles; even those who bore the burden of his unlucky financial
+schemes uniting in cheerful testimony to his charming, companionable
+qualities. His presence was like a ray of sunlight to Marcus Wilkeson's
+beclouded mind; and when Wesley Tiffles hooked an arm in his (as he did
+to everybody on the second day of their acquaintance), Marcus felt his
+perplexities passing away from him, like electricity on a
+conducting rod.
+
+Wesley Tiffles and his single diamond (the latter from the background of
+a third day's shirt) shone on him together; and Marcus laughed
+merrily in reply:
+
+"I don't look sad now," said he. "I'm glad to see you, Tiffles. What are
+you driving at _now_, eh?"
+
+This question was continually poked at Tiffles. He changed his business
+so often.
+
+"At the panorama of Africa, to be sure," said Tiffles. "It is a great
+idea, and I am constant to it, although several capital schemes have
+occurred to me since I first thought of it. But Africa deserves, and
+shall have the precedence."
+
+"Oh! yes--I remember. And how far have you got along with this great
+work?"
+
+"It's almost finished, thank you. Patching is the artist. You know
+Patching, of course--one of the most promising painters of the modern
+school. There were several Patchings very much praised by the Sunday
+papers, at the last National Academy Exhibition, though the hanging
+committee put them either among the dirt or the cobwebs. This conspiracy
+against Patching is far-reaching. It would seem as if his rivals of the
+Academy actually went about town calling upon people, and cautioning
+them _not_ to buy Patchings. Indeed, to such an extent has this
+outrageous attempt to put down a fellow artist been carried, that I know
+of but one Patching to be publicly seen in the city. It is an attic
+interior--a sweet thing, quite equal to Frere, and hangs behind a bar
+near Spring street. Perhaps you would like to examine it?"
+
+"Hem! Not to-day. Some other time," answered Marcus, who, strangely
+enough, interpreted the question as an invitation to drink at his
+(Marcus's) expense.
+
+"I did not mean to-day," said Wesley Tiffles. "Any time will do. Well, I
+have engaged this brilliant but neglected creature to paint my panorama.
+At first he refused--as I expected. He said that it would hurt his
+reputation. I argued to him, that, the larger the picture, the more the
+reputation; and said that I would put his name on the bills in type
+second only to my own. But he could not bring himself to see the matter
+as I did, and consented to paint it only on condition of profound
+secrecy. Price, one hundred dollars. You will therefore understand
+(Tiffles lowered his voice) that what I am saying to you is strictly
+confidential--as, indeed, all is that I say about my panorama. Secrecy
+alone gives value to these grand, original ideas."
+
+Wesley Tiffles was always unbosoming himself to the world, and informing
+each individual hearer that his disclosure was strictly confidential.
+
+"I give you my word," said Marcus. He wondered where Tiffles raised the
+money to pay the artist, but did not like to ask him.
+
+"Now I have caught you, you must come and see how we get along. The work
+is going on at my room in the Bartholomew Buildings, only a few steps
+from here." (According to Tiffles, the Bartholomew Buildings were only a
+few steps from anywhere, when he wanted to take anybody to them.)
+"Patching will object to bringing in a stranger; but I can pass you off
+as a capitalist, who thinks of taking an interest in the panorama. Good
+joke, that!"
+
+Marcus drew back a little at the joke; but Wesley Tiffles had proved so
+great a relief to his low spirits, that he determined to keep on taking
+him, and expressed his ardent desire to see the panorama.
+
+The couple, arm in arm, sauntered into Broadway, and down that
+thoroughfare. Tiffles nodded to a great many acquaintances, and Wilkeson
+to a very few. People whom Tiffles did not know personally, he had short
+biographies of, and he entertained Marcus with an incessant string of
+anecdotes and memoranda of passers by. The walk was leisurely and
+uninterrupted, with two exceptions, when Wesley Tiffles broke suddenly
+from his companion, rushed into the entry of a photographic
+establishment, and examined numerous square feet of show portraits with
+profound interest. Marcus explained these impulsive movements on the
+supposition that Tiffles sought to escape from approaching duns. He
+noticed that that individual, while observing people who streamed by him
+on either side, kept one eye, as it were, about a block and a half
+ahead. In some parts of the world, Marcus might have objected to walking
+publicly with a man of such an eccentric demeanor. But he was well aware
+that, in New York, a citizen's reputation is not in the least degree
+affected by the company that he keeps.
+
+They soon arrived at the Bartholomew Buildings--a rickety five-story
+edifice, which had been altered from a hotel to a nest of private
+offices. The basement was a restaurant, the first floor a dry goods
+store, and thence to the roof there was a small Babel of trades and
+professions known and unknown. No census taker had ever booked all the
+businesses and all the names under that comprehensive roof.
+
+In the upper story of this building, at the end of a long, hall, the
+floor of which was hollowed in places by the feet of half a century, was
+the room, or office, as he called it, of Mr. Wesley Tiffles. There was
+no number, or sign, on the door, but only a card bearing the
+inscription, in a bold hand, "Back in five minutes." Mr. Tiffles always
+put out this standing announcement whenever he had occasion to absent
+himself from his office for an indefinite period. At the top of the door
+there was a swinging window, which was ever close fastened, and covered
+with four thicknesses of newspapers. Though door and window were shut,
+there came from this room, as if through pores of the wood and the
+glass, a strong odor of tobacco smoke. A voice within could be heard
+softly humming an operatic air.
+
+Wesley Tiffles opened the door with a latch key, saying, "All right!" in
+a loud voice, as he did so. Marcus entered with him into a blue cloud of
+smoke heated to a sickly degree by a small coal stove with a prodigious
+quantity of pipe. Even Marcus's hardened lungs found it difficult
+to breathe.
+
+The room was about twenty feet square. It had been a part of the laundry
+when the building was a hotel. The walls, from the floor to the low
+ceiling, appeared to be hung with a strange, dim tapestry. A second
+glance convinced Marcus Wilkeson that this seeming tapestry was the
+panorama, which was fastened on stretchers along three sides of the
+room, and rolled up in a corner as fast as completed. At the farther end
+of the room, barely visible through the smoke, was the figure of a man
+in a torn and dirty dressing gown, and an enormous black felt hat with a
+huge turn-up brim, of the kind supposed to be worn by the bandits of the
+Pyrenees. The back of the man was turned to Marcus Wilkeson, and he was
+making rapid dabs on the canvas with a long brush, frequently dipping
+into one of a series of pails or pans which stood on the floor by his
+side. He was smoking and humming the operatic air at the same time; and
+he pulled his great slouched hat farther over his eyes, as a signal for
+impertinent curiosity to keep its distance.
+
+Wesley Tiffles whispered something about the eccentricities of genius,
+and then said:
+
+"Mr. Patching. Allow me. Mr. Wilkeson. A capitalist, who thinks of
+taking a small interest in the panorama. Confidential, of course."
+
+The artist turned round during these remarks, and presented the original
+of a portrait which Marcus remembered to have seen--dressing gown, hat,
+and all--in a small print-shop window in the Sixth Avenue. Touching the
+face he might have had doubt, but there was no mistaking the pattern of
+the dressing gown and the amazing hat. He also had a faint recollection
+of the thin face, the Vandyke beard, and the long, tangled hair at Mrs.
+Slapman's, on New Year's, but was not positive as to their identity. Mr.
+Patching's individuality lay chiefly in his hat.
+
+The artist placed a moist hand, with one long finger nail like a claw,
+at the disposal of Marcus Wilkeson. The latter gentleman shook the
+member feebly, and distinctly felt the sharp edge of the long finger
+nail in his palm. It was an unpleasant sensation.
+
+"Happy to meet a _confidential_ friend of Tiffles's," said Patching.
+"Painting panoramas is not exactly what I have been used to. An artist's
+reputation is his capital in trade, you know." He spoke slowly and
+languidly, as if hope and happiness were quite dead within him, and he
+had consented to live on only for the good of high Art.
+
+"I understand," said Marcus. "The secret shall be inviolate."
+
+"Nothing but my old friendship for Tiffles here could possibly have
+induced me to undertake the job. My enemies--and I have them, ha! ha!"
+(he said this bitterly)--"would like nothing better to say of Patching,
+than that he had got down to the panorama line of business. It would be
+a pretty piece of scandal."
+
+"My lips are sealed, sir. But it strikes me, as a casual observer, that
+there is nothing to be ashamed of in this beautiful work of art." Marcus
+Wilkeson had the amiable vice of flattery.
+
+Patching shrugged his shoulders, and made a contemptuous gesture toward
+the canvas with his outstretched brush. "A mere daub," said he. "One
+step higher than painting a barn or a board fence--that's all."
+
+"Yet the true artist adorns what he touches," said Marcus.
+
+Patching accepted the homage calmly, as one who knew that he deserved
+it. "A very just and discriminating remark, sir. I have no doubt that a
+person thoroughly familiar with my style would say, looking at this
+panorama, 'It has the severe simplicity of a Patching.' I consented to
+paint it, as Tiffles well remembers, only on condition that I should not
+wholly abase myself by abandoning the style upon which I have built up
+my reputation."
+
+Tiffles, thus appealed to, corroborated the statement with a solemn bow.
+
+The artist continued: "Fortunately, the subject is one peculiarly
+adapted to my genius. For instance: the desert of Sahara is a dead level
+of sand. It is a perfect type of severe simplicity in the highest sense.
+It exhibits no common display of gorgeous colors, such as poor artists
+and the ignorant crowd rejoice in. As far as the eye can see, there is a
+serene stretch of yellow sand, without even a blade of grass to break
+its awful immensity." (The artist, being on his favorite theme, took his
+pipe out of his mouth for the first time, and spoke with warmth.) "Look
+at that bit of desert, now. Does it not convey a perfect idea of
+solitude and desolation?"
+
+Marcus Wilkeson glanced at about ten feet of straight yellow paint
+(which was all of the desert of Sahara not rolled up in the canvas), and
+said that it did--which was perfectly true.
+
+"There are one hundred feet more, which you don't see, just like it.
+Another artist would have put in an oasis, or a stray hyena, or the
+bleached bones of an unfortunate traveller. _I_ did not. Why? Another
+would have worked up a sunset, or a moonrise, or a thunder storm, to
+give variety to the sky. _I_ did not. Why? The sky over my desert is an
+uninterrupted blue. There is not even a bird in it. There is nothing, in
+short, either on the ground or in the air, to take away the mind of the
+spectator, for one moment, from the sublime idea of a desert--an object
+which, considered aesthetically, is one of the grandest in the universe.
+This is severe simplicity. It is the highest school of Art."
+
+"And the cheapest," observed Tiffles; "which is an important
+consideration when you have an acre or two of canvas to paint. It would
+cost a deal more to put in the sun and moon, travelling caravans, and
+other objects of interest, here and there."
+
+"Incidentally it may be the cheapest," said Patching. "But that is a
+question for capitalists, and not for artists to determine. True Art
+never thinks of the expense."
+
+"It always seemed to me to be the easiest school of Art," said Marcus
+Wilkeson. "I suppose, now, that you can dash off twenty or thirty rods
+of this a day."
+
+Patching smiled with a lofty pity. "So I can. Not because it is the
+easiest, though--far from it; but because I happen to have a genius for
+quick and sure touches. You, not being a professional artist, think the
+execution of that scrap of desert and sky an easy matter. Perhaps you
+fancy that you could do it." There was the least infusion of satire in
+the artist's tone.
+
+"Oh, no!" replied Marcus Wilkeson, who ever shrank from wounding the
+self-love of a fellow creature. "I am not rash enough to suppose that I
+could do it. I merely observed that it seemed--to my inexperienced
+eyes--an easy matter. A few strokes of yellow paint here, for sand, and
+a few strokes of blue paint there, for sky. But I am not even an
+amateur, and so my opinion goes for nothing."
+
+"I admire your frankness," said Patching. "Now let me convince you
+practically. Be good enough to stand near this window with me."
+
+Marcus moved to the spot indicated by the artist.
+
+"Here," said Patching, "you are at about the same distance from the
+desert as the front row of spectators will be. Now look at it
+critically."
+
+Marcus shaded his eyes with his left hand, cocked his head over his
+right shoulder, in the true critical style, and gazed on the scene.
+
+"Do you see the harmony--the TONE, I may say--in the desert?" asked
+Patching, after a short pause.
+
+"I think I do," responded Marcus, willing to oblige the artist.
+
+"And the spiritual, or INNER meaning of the sky?"
+
+"Ye-yes. It is quite perceptible."
+
+"These are the effects of severe simplicity. But you must understand
+that a single mis-stroke of the brush would have spoiled all the harmony
+in the desert, or reduced the sky to a mere inexpressive field of blue
+vapor. Why? Genius alone can achieve such grand results by such
+apparently simple means. You comprehend?"
+
+"Perfectly," said Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"Then I shall take a real pleasure in showing you more of the panorama
+which is already completed and rolled up. With this idea of severe
+simplicity in your mind, you will be prepared to appreciate the work,"
+
+"I believe I have already remarked, that Mr. Wilkeson is a capitalist,
+and comes here expressly to look at the panorama," said Tiffles; with a
+wink at the artist.
+
+"With every respect for him as a capitalist," returned Patching, "I see
+in him only the ingenuous student of Art, whom it is a happiness
+to teach."
+
+The first instalment was a continuation of the desert with which Marcus
+had been already regaled. Patching begged him to observe the unfaltering
+harmony of the sand, and the protracted spirituality of the sky. Then
+came a jungle.
+
+"You will note the severe simplicity here," observed Patching, "No
+meretricious effects. Nothing but strokes of green paint, up and down,
+representing the density of an African jungle. Yet how admirably these
+seemingly careless strokes, laid on by the hand of genius, convey the
+idea of DEPTH! You do not fail to notice the DEPTH, I presume?"
+
+"I see it," said Marcus.
+
+"_That_ is severe simplicity," replied the artist.
+
+At this point, Marcus noticed a brown something bearing a strong
+resemblance to the swamp stalk, known among boys as the cattail. "Excuse
+my ignorance of African plants," said he; "but what is that?"
+
+The artist smiled. "Another happy illustration of my theory," said he.
+"It is the tail of a lion bounding through his native jungles. Why? The
+effect of suggesting the lion, so to speak, is much more thrilling than
+that of painting him at full length. Genius accomplishes by hints what
+mere talent fails to achieve by the utmost elaboration. You will not
+deny that that vague revelation of the lion's tail inspires a feeling of
+mystery and terror, which would not be caused by a full-length portrait
+of that king of beasts?"
+
+Marcus Wilkeson did not deny it, but said that perhaps everybody could
+not identify the object as a lion's tail.
+
+"That has all been thought of," said Tiffles. "I shall explain the
+panorama, you must understand. When I come to the lion's tail, I shall
+tell the audience what it is, and go on to give a full account of the
+lion, and his ferocious habits. This will gratify the women and small
+boys quite as much as seeing the lion _in propria persona_."
+
+"Precisely. Very good," was the laughing acknowledgment. "And what is
+that thing, twisted like a piece of grapevine above the tall grass at
+this point?"
+
+"The trunk of an elephant. Look a little farther on, as the canvas
+unrolls, and you will observe the white tusk of a rhinoceros protruding
+from the jungle with wonderful effect. Why? The two animals are
+advancing toward each other for mortal combat."
+
+"I shall describe their terrific struggles," interrupted Tiffles. "Have
+read up Buffon for it."
+
+"More lions' and elephants' tails, you observe," continued the artist;
+"also more rhinoceroses' tusks. It is well to have enough of them, to
+illustrate the teeming life of the African jungle. Also the head of a
+boa constrictor. Likewise the tail of one. Here we come to a change of
+scene. Mark how wonderfully a few strokes of dark-green paint, put on by
+the hand of genius, impart the idea of a pestiferous swamp. That
+odd-looking object, like a rock, is the head of a hippopotamus. A few
+feet beyond, you notice two things like the stumps of aquatic weeds.
+Those are the tails of two hippopotamuses engaged in deadly strife at
+the bottom of the swamp. The heads of crocodiles are thrust up here and
+there. Severe simplicity again."
+
+The panorama, from thence nearly to the end of it--or rather the
+beginning--was a repetition of jungles and deserts, varied by an
+occasional swamp, all diversified with the heads and tails of indigenous
+animals. The last hundred feet was the river Gambier, over which
+Patching had introduced a sunrise of the most gorgeous description, at
+the earnest request of Wesley Tiffles.
+
+Patching explained: "In my opinion, such effects are tawdry, and detract
+not only from the severe simplicity, but from the UNITY which should
+pervade a painting of this description. Of course, I wash my hands of
+all these innovations upon the province of high Art."
+
+"And I cheerfully shoulder them," said Tiffles. "I know what the public
+want. They want any quantity of sunsets, crocodiles, lions, and other
+objects of interest. If we had time and money to spare, and I could
+overcome Patching's scruples--do you understand?--I would put 'em in
+twice as thick. Men of genius, like Patching, cannot be expected to be
+practical."
+
+The artist shrugged his shoulders, and smiled.
+
+Tiffles then repeated his invitation to Marcus to accompany him on his
+first expedition into the interior of New Jersey; but Marcus positively
+declined. Tiffles said he would send him a note a day or two before the
+panorama started, and hoped that Marcus would conclude to go, just for
+the fun of the thing.
+
+Marcus then shook hands with Patching--who made his long finger nail
+amicably felt--and with Tiffles, and withdrew to the entry, followed by
+the latter individual.
+
+Tiffles closed the door. "By the way," said he, as if the thought
+occurred to him then for the first time, "can you spare thirty-five
+dollars to-day? Pay you on the--let me see--on the first of next month.
+By that time the panorama will be fairly under headway, and coining
+money." (Tiffles always fixed his days of payment with great
+particularity.)
+
+Marcus, without saying a word, produced his pocket book, and counted out
+thirty-five dollars. Tiffles had already borrowed from Overtop and
+Maltboy, but had generously spared the oldest of the three bachelors.
+Marcus felt that his time had come, and he would not meanly avoid his
+destiny. He placed the money in Tiffles's hand.
+
+"Give you my note?" asked Tiffles.
+
+"Oh, no!" said Marcus; "make it a matter of honor."
+
+Tiffles pocketed the funds, placed his hand over his heart, and replied
+that it should be. "But, now I think of it," he suddenly added, "I want
+exactly sixty-three dollars--do you understand?--to see me through with
+this panorama. Suppose you make it twenty-eight dollars more."
+
+Marcus smiled, and said that he didn't understand; whereat Tiffles
+laughed outright, to show that he took no offence at the refusal; and
+creditor and debtor parted with mutual good wishes.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+LOVING AFAR OFF.
+
+The boy Bog had now become, professionally, a creature of the night. He
+was abroad at the, same hours as the burglars and garroters, and other
+owls and weasels of society. Fink & Co. (Bog was the Co.) had secured
+the bill posting for three theatres and one negro-minstrel hall. This
+they called their heavy business. Carrying the huge damp placards, had
+already given to Bog's shoulders a manifest tendency to roundness, which
+he was constantly trying to overcome by straightening up. Fink, who was
+the veteran bill poster of the town, was as round shouldered as a hod
+carrier. But Bog thought of somebody, and stood as nearly erect as
+he could.
+
+The firm also obtained rather more than their share of ordinary bill
+posting, from doctors, drygoods dealers, and other people who find their
+profit in continually addressing the public from the summit of a dead
+wall, or the muddy level of the curbstones. This they called their light
+business. As it required neither strength nor practised dexterity of
+manipulation, the firm intrusted it to assistants.
+
+There were a dozen of these, all stout, hulking young fellows nearly as
+old as Bog. They took a fancy to bill posting, and worked industriously
+and faithfully at it, because it was nocturnal, mysterious, romantic.
+The half dollar which they each received for a night's labor, enabled
+them to lounge about the streets all day in glorious indolence.
+Sometimes there was a prodigious rush of business, and then the firm
+were obliged to hire an extra force of boys.
+
+Once, when a quack undertook to take the public by storm with his "New
+and Sure Cure for Dyspepsia," Fink & Co. put a colored poster as large
+as a dining table on every wall and high fence below Sixty-first street;
+small oblong bills every ten feet along the curbstones of Broadway,
+Bowery, Wall street, Fulton street, Cortlandt street, and Third, Fourth,
+Fifth, Sixth, Eighth, Madison, and Lexington Avenues; besides throwing
+cheap circulars, folded, into the front yards of about four thousand
+residences in the fashionable quarters of the town--all in a single
+night. This immense job took one hundred boys.
+
+Bog had been in this partnership since the first of January. It was now
+near the close of March. The firm had been very successful. Bog had
+comfortably supported himself and his aunt (whose rheumatism got worse
+in steady proportion as his business improved), and had invested more
+than two hundred and fifty dollars in a Wall-street savings bank.
+
+With this money at his disposal, Bog might have thrown away the greasy
+cap and old coat and trowsers, spotted with paste, in which he pursued
+his occupation. But when Bog was at his business, he was not above his
+business. And he felt none the less attached to his old clothes because
+they were two inches too short in the legs and arms, and pinched him a
+little in all directions.
+
+But Bog had a better suit, made of neat gray cloth, which he wore upon
+occasions. These occasions happened daily between three and four P.M.
+During that interval, it always fell out that Bog had no work to do
+which he could not postpone as well as not. And whether it rained or
+shone, the occasions brought him, like an inexorable fate, through the
+street where Miss Pillbody's school was situated. He would first stride
+smartly up the opposite sidewalk, whistling, and cast ardent glances at
+the lower windows of Miss Pillbody's school, shaded by green curtains
+with gold borders.
+
+After going two blocks in that direction, he would cross the street,
+whistling yet, and march boldly up the other sidewalk, past Miss
+Pillbody's school, as on an enemy. But if there had been anybody to
+watch him closely--as there was not on that thronged street--that body
+would have seen that Bog's cheeks began to blush, and his eyes to be
+cast down, and his whistle to be fainter, as he hurried by the neat
+three-story brick building with the polished doorplate and
+handsome curtains.
+
+Then he would loiter for a while in front of McFeeter's grocery, two
+corners remote, and gaze from that safe distance with intrepidity upon
+the abode of enchantment; after which he would screw his courage up to
+the point of marching past the house back and forth again, and would
+then resume his position at McFeeter's, and wait until four P.M., or
+about that time, when the envied door of Miss Pillbody's establishment
+would open, and an angel would dazzle upon his sight, with a music book
+in her hand instead of a harp, and a jaunty little chip bonnet on her
+head instead of a golden crown. If the harp and crown had suddenly taken
+their proper places, and a pair of spangled wings had blossomed right
+out of her shoulders, and the radiant creature, thus equipped, had
+spread her pinions and soared up to heaven, the boy Bog would hardly
+have been surprised. As this angel came down the happy front steps to
+the blessed pavement (Bog's mind supplying these adjectives), Bog would
+color up, and sneak off at his best walking pace in the opposite
+direction. He felt that, if Pet ever saw him, and should ask him what he
+was doing in that neighborhood, he should melt away in perspiring
+confusion on the spot.
+
+He called at Mr. Minford's twice a week, to indulge in the hollow form
+of asking if he could do anything for him. There he confronted Pet, with
+that trembling figure and those averted eyes which an inexperienced
+thief may show before the man that he has robbed. But Pet knew not of
+the adoring spy.
+
+One afternoon, the boy Bog had made his second detour, and was
+approaching the corner of the favored block, when a novel idea struck
+him. The very night before, Bog had posted bills of the play, "Faint
+Heart Ne'er Won Fair Lady." The gigantic lettering arose in his mind's
+eye, like the cross in Constantine's. He had never seen the drama, and
+he did not know to what extent Ruy Gomez pushed his audacity, and won
+the Countess by it. But the name of the drama held the moral of it; and
+the moral, as applied to Bog's case, was: "Stop at this corner, and take
+a good view of the, house." To do this, in Bog's opinion, was the height
+of boldness. But he thought of the huge parti-colored lettering, and
+he did it.
+
+He stopped at the corner, and leaned recklessly against a hydrant. He
+looked at the house with a deliberation that amazed himself. At the same
+time, as a matter of instinctive caution, he kept his left leg well out
+toward the side street, so that he might retreat, should the door
+suddenly open and disclose the seraphic vision. He consulted his large
+bull's-eye silver watch (a capital timekeeper), and found that it was
+half past three o'clock, and he never knew her to be out before four.
+
+This reflection emboldened him. "Faint Heart Ne'er Won Fair Lady," he
+thought again, and brought back his left leg to an easy position,
+crossing it with his right one against the hydrant. Then he feasted,
+with strange composure, upon the house.
+
+Neither Bog nor a much wiser metaphysician could explain it; but the
+house, and all around it, seemed to be glorified by the loved one
+within. The newly painted door was bright with love; the polished
+doorplate and bell handle glistened with love. The name Pillbody looked,
+somehow, musical and winning, because the owner of that name was the
+teacher and dear companion of Pet. The carved stone roses over the door
+seemed to be truly the emblems of love. It was a silly notion; but, in
+Bog's eyes, love imparted a not unpleasant expression to the grim lions'
+faces that looked down from the roof. But the green window curtains with
+gold borders were the most significant symbols of love, in his eyes. Bog
+felt that curtains of any other color would be wholly out of place in
+that house. The patch of a garden, scarcely bigger than a bathroom, in
+front of the house; the single fir tree that grew up in the middle of
+it; the black iron railing; the door steps, and the pavement--all took
+their share of beatitude from the joy within. Bog could hear love rustle
+in the boughs of the young maple, that stood in its long green case like
+a fancy boot top, at the edge of the sidewalk.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+LEGERDEMAIN.
+
+As Bog was resting against the hydrant, absorbed in this delicious
+revery, and totally indifferent to the consequences, he was startled by
+a slight tap on the shoulder. He turned quickly, and saw--the man he
+hated--the man who pretended (Bog would never admit that it was more
+than a pretence) to save Pet from the falling boards.
+
+"Well," said Bog, looking on this man as his mortal enemy, "What do you
+want of me?" He spoke in the gruff, defiant manner peculiar to children
+of the city.
+
+The man's livid face and lead-colored eyes and white teeth all combined
+in a reassuring smile. "Nothing," said he, "my good fellow, but to do
+an errand."
+
+"I say, now, who'd you take me for, hey?" answered Bog, shaking his head
+at the man, and feeling a tremendous desire to knock his shining
+hat off.
+
+The man looked up and down Bog's cheap gray suit, and at his neatly
+polished shoes and his clean slouching cap, and then said:
+
+"No offence meant, my lad. But I thought you wouldn't object to earning
+a quarter. You're only to deliver a letter at that house; that's all."
+He pointed to Miss Pillbody's.
+
+"Hey--what house?" asked Bog, turning pale, with a strange and jarring
+combination of rage, jealousy, envy, and insulted dignity.
+
+"The one with the bright doorplate, green curtains and gold borders. I
+thought you were looking at it as I came up."
+
+"N-no, I wasn't. And what if I was, hey?"
+
+"It strikes me you're rather touchy, my young friend," said the man,
+with his conciliatory smile. "Here's the letter, now, and a quarter.
+It's only a few steps. No answer required."
+
+As Bog caught sight of the letter, done up in the long, rakish envelope
+which had just begun to come into fashion, and faintly perfumed, a lucky
+thought occurred to him.
+
+The man saw that he wavered. "Only a step," said he. "And here is the
+quarter." He offered it to Bog between a thumb and finger.
+
+"Why don't you deliver the letter yourself?" asked Bog.
+
+"Oh! oh! for family reasons," answered the man, hesitating. "Miss
+Pillbody there is my aunt, and the lady to whom this letter is addressed
+is my cousin. The old woman and I have had a sort of falling out about
+the young one, you see. These little difficulties will occur in the
+best-regulated families. Come, take the letter. I'm in a hurry."
+
+Bog allowed the letter to be thrust into his hand. He looked at it, and
+saw, as he expected, that it was addressed to "Miss Minford, Present."
+The direction was in a beautiful commercial hand, which was at once
+more hateful in his eyes than the most crabbed of writing.
+
+"All right," said he. "I'll deliver it. Poh! never mind the quarter. I
+won't take it." Bog moved toward the house as he spoke.
+
+"You're a queer fellow, but a good one. Well, you'll accept my thanks,
+at any rate."
+
+He waited at the hydrant until Bog had delivered the letter.
+
+Bog walked straight to the house, and up the steps, although his face
+was pale, and his knees trembled.
+
+He rang the bell with a decisive pull, and, as he did so, glanced at the
+strange man, who nodded approvingly at him.
+
+He suddenly turned his back on the strange man. With a quick movement of
+the fingers of his right hand, he thrust the letter up his coat sleeve:
+The next instant he whipped a handkerchief out of an inside breast
+pocket, and, with it, a stray copy of a new "Dentifrice" circular, which
+he had been distributing the night before. This circular was folded to
+about the size and shape of the letter. With the handkerchief he wiped
+his face, upon which there were real drops of sweat. The circular he
+slipped into his right hand, and then turned toward the strange man
+again, to show that he still held the letter. This bit of legerdemain
+took about three seconds.
+
+In three seconds more, Bog heard footsteps approaching in the entry.
+What if his angel should come to the door? The thought sent a horrible,
+sickly sensation all over him, and the solid rock seemed to tremble
+beneath his feet.
+
+The door opened, and something quite the opposite of an angel presented
+itself. It was Bridget; and her red hair was dishevelled, her face
+flushed to the parboiled tint, and her dress uncommonly damp and frowsy.
+A mop which she held in her hand explained everything.
+
+"A circular, if you please," said Bog, in a quivering voice, poking the
+folded paper at her.
+
+"A succular, is it? Miss Peelbody told me not to take any succulars for
+her. So 'way wid ye." Bridget put her hand on the door, and was about to
+swing it to.
+
+"It isn't for Miss Pillbody at all," said Bog, fearful lest the strange
+man should see it refused, "but for your own pretty self."
+
+Bridget smiled, for she was conscious that the compliment was deserved.
+She relaxed her hand on the door. "Fat is it?" said she.
+
+"Hush!" said Bog, in a whisper; "a circular about the rights of
+servants, issued by the 'Servants' Mootual Protecting Society.'" (Bog
+thought of the name on the spur of the moment.) "Please take it--quick."
+
+Bridget snatched the circular out of his hand, and was about to look at
+it, bottom side up, for she had not yet attained to the mystery of
+reading, when the musical voice of Miss Pillbody was heard at the back
+of the entry. "Bridget--what is wanted, Bridget?"
+
+"Nothing ma'am, but one of these succular men. Bad luck to him! Here,
+now, take it."
+
+She made a feint of handing back the circular to Bog, but concealed it,
+with the other hand, in her capacious bosom.
+
+"Heaven bless ye!" said she, in a low voice, and then slammed the door
+in his face.
+
+Bog came down the door steps quickly, and saw the strange man make a bow
+and a gesture of gratitude at him, and then disappear suddenly round the
+corner. Bog's first impulse was to follow him at a distance; but his
+curiosity to inspect the slender, perfumed letter, overcame it.
+
+When Bog reached the awning in front of McFeeter's store--a sort of
+haven or putting-in place for him--he pulled out the letter, and was
+about to read it. Then it occurred to him that the situation was too
+much exposed. The strange man might come back, and see him with the open
+letter in his hand. Bog would have enjoyed a personal collision with him
+on any pretext; but to be caught in the act of reading the letter, would
+spoil the strategical advantage that Bog now had over him.
+
+Bog moved on down a side street, and took his stand behind a huge
+wooden column surmounted by a gilded mortar and pestle. Here he was
+about to rip open the envelope, but a glance across the street
+discovered a policeman looking at him. Bog felt guilty and awkward. He
+coughed, and thrust the letter into his pocket, and moved on again. The
+exciting events of the morning had made Bog intensely nervous. He did
+not stop this time until he had gained his home.
+
+His aunt was sitting in the front room, reading a book through a huge
+pair of silver-rimmed spectacles. There was a thick fold of flannel
+about her neck, and she smelt strongly of embrocation. As Bog rushed
+into the room, she groaned audibly, and laid down the book, as if it
+were a wicked enjoyment.
+
+"I'm so bad to-day, Bog," said she. "Them shootin' pains'll be the death
+of me."
+
+Bog responded not a word, but dashed across the apartment, and, entering
+his little sleeping room, closed the door, and bolted it.
+
+"Unfeelin' creetur!" said his aunt. She stopped groaning, and took up
+her book and read again.
+
+Bog seated himself on his hair trunk, and drew out the letter. There was
+a slight discussion within him on the abstract question of his right to
+open it. After turning it over twice, the question was decided in the
+affirmative. He slit the envelope with his thumb, and brought to light a
+billet faultlessly written, as follows:
+
+"Frederick Lynville begs to present his compliments to Miss Minford, and
+to assure her, from the depths of his heart, that his feelings toward
+her are only those of the purest admiration for the matchless charms of
+her mind and person. He takes this method of explaining himself, because
+he has observed with great sorrow that Miss Minford has shown a desire
+to avoid him on several recent occasions, when they have accidentally
+met in the street. It was Mr. Lynville's blessed privilege, under
+Providence, to save Miss Minford's life; but he would not be selfish and
+base enough on that account to obtrude himself on Miss Minford's notice.
+Mr. Lynville would die sooner than be guilty of that discourtesy. He is
+not presumptuous enough to ask an answer to this letter. His only object
+in writing it, is to inform Miss Minford that he will not venture again
+upon the impropriety of speaking to her first when they next meet. Miss
+Minford will therefore be free to drop his acquaintance, or continue it,
+as she thinks best. Whatever fate she may decide for him, her happiness
+will still be his constant prayer."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Bog was ill versed in the art of complimentary letter writing. But the
+villany here seemed to be clumsily concealed. That the letter was full
+of danger to the object of his boyish idolatry, he had no doubt.
+
+But why did Pet avoid this Frederick Lynville? Did she really dislike
+him? Or----. The thought of his own shyness toward the beautiful girl
+came into his mind like a flash. To avoid might be--to love.
+
+The poor boy dropped the letter, and covered his face with his hands,
+and wept.
+
+Love is not always selfish; and goodness is sometimes its own reward. In
+that bitter hour of his first real misery, Bog did not regret his
+kindness to the Minfords, or take credit to himself for having nobly
+concealed from their knowledge those little weekly gifts of money which
+he sent to them through the mail, when they were in poorer
+circumstances. He was not for a moment base enough to think that Pet
+would look with kinder eyes on him, if she but knew of his secret
+benefactions--which, up to this time, neither she nor her father had
+suspected, and which they would never learn from his lips.
+
+
+
+BOOK SIXTH.
+
+MYSTERIES OF THE NIGHT.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE UNKNOWN HAND.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson made no effort to discover the writer of the anonymous
+letter, because he knew that such an effort would be in vain. He called
+on Mr. Minford once in two or three days now. The inventor always took
+occasion to refer to the letter, and assured Marcus that it was not
+worth remembering, or talking about. "Why, then, did he talk about it?"
+Marcus asked himself. His eyes were not blind to watchful and suspicious
+glances which the old man directed to him, at times, under cover of
+those shaggy, overhanging eyebrows. Nor could he help noticing a strange
+reserve in the bearing of Pet toward him. It was not mere modesty, or
+timid gratitude, but DOUBT, as he read the signs. Marcus was convinced
+that the father had put his child on guard against something, though he
+might not have mentioned the existence of the anonymous letter. This
+thought distressed him acutely.
+
+But his troubles, as well as his joys, he kept to himself. The miser
+puts his broken bank notes and his good gold under the same lock
+and key.
+
+One evening, early in April, Overtop and Maltboy observed a peculiar
+expression of sadness on the face of their friend. He had eaten nothing
+at dinner, but had drunk more than his usual allowance of sherry. He had
+kept his eyes fixed on the table as in a revery, and had scarcely spoken
+a word. Miss Wilkeson, in her solemn state opposite the boiled chickens,
+was hardly less social.
+
+After dinner, Marcus took to his pipe with a strange sullenness, and
+smoked furiously. His two friends, closely regarding him, saw that he
+was unhappy, but wisely forbore to make him more unhappy still by
+obtruding their condolence on him. The day had been rainy and cold. They
+knew that Marcus's spirits were barometrically sensitive to the weather,
+like those of most persons who look at it through a window.
+
+They had noticed, as they came home, that he was reading that sweetest
+of elegies, the "In Memoriam" of Tennyson. And the two friends thought
+that the melancholy weather and the melancholy poem together fully
+accounted for the gloom on his brow.
+
+Marcus sat for some minutes meditating. Then he heaved a sigh, which was
+distinctly audible to his two friends. Then he left the room without
+saying a word, and went up stairs.
+
+Presently he was heard to come down; but, instead of returning to the
+little parlor, he went into the street, and closed the door with a sharp
+slam. At the same moment, the cold rain of the April night beat noisily
+against the window.
+
+"Sly old fellow!" said Maltboy.
+
+"Up to something, depend on it," said Overtop.
+
+Marcus walked rapidly toward the inventor's house. "My fate is decided
+to-night," he muttered.
+
+His long strides soon brought him to the house. The old building wore a
+gloomy look. He did not speculate on the reason of this. It was probably
+because there was no light visible in any of the front windows, and very
+little light in the street lamps. The gas burned low and blue, and
+flickered in the wind.
+
+Ringing the bell, Marcus was admitted by one of the numerous children
+belonging to somebody in the house (Marcus could never determine to
+whom), and walked up to the inventor's room. His heart beat with strange
+emotion as he rapped at the door. For a moment he was sorry that he
+had come.
+
+"Come in," said the inventor, in a voice more sepulchral than usual.
+
+Marcus entered the apartment. The inventor received him with a feeble
+shake of the hand, bearing no resemblance to the hearty one which he
+used to bestow in the early days of their acquaintance. Marcus noticed
+that Mr. Minford's hand was hot. He also observed that his eyes were
+preternaturally lustrous, and that the circles under them were deep and
+dark. His cheeks were deathly pale, saving a little red spot in the
+centres. He looked like a man in a state of fearful mental exaltation
+and nervous excitement.
+
+Marcus was not in the habit of worrying people upon the subject of their
+ill health; but the inventor looked so palpably bad, that Marcus could
+not forbear to say, in a tone of anxiety, "You are unwell, sir."
+
+"Oh, no! Quite well, I assure you," said the inventor, with a weary
+smile. "Though I should be sick, perhaps, but for the glorious hope that
+bears me up. I have not eaten, or slept, for forty-eight hours."
+
+"But, my dear sir, this is trifling with your health."
+
+"I acknowledge it. But we must make sacrifices, if we would master the
+UNKNOWN. Newton lived on bread and water when he wrote his immortal
+Principia. He condemned himself to the coarse fare of a prison, in order
+that his intellect might soar untrammelled to the stars. I have improved
+on Newton--I eat nothing. As for sleep, I grudge a single hour of it
+which comes between me and the completion of my great work."
+
+"But how long can you stand this dreadful strain upon your powers?"
+
+"Till daylight to-morrow, with safety. By that time I shall have
+overcome the last obstacle. Of this I am confident. Then, ho! for
+unbounded wealth and undying fame. The toil has been severe, but the
+reward will be glorious."
+
+"I congratulate you," said Marcus, "on the near approach of your final
+triumph. And, in order that I may not delay you a single moment, I will
+bid you 'good-night.'" Marcus rose, but he hoped that the inventor would
+ask him to stay.
+
+The inventor did so. "Pray don't hurry, Mr. Wilkeson; I would like to
+have a brief conversation with you. A few minutes only." He drew a chair
+to the side of Marcus, and seated himself.
+
+"Mr. Wilkeson," he said, in a deliberate voice, as if he were repeating
+carefully-considered words, "it is unnecessary for me to say that I have
+the highest opinion of you. Providence seems to have sent you to me at a
+time when I was in the greatest need. You saved me from starving. The
+world will be as much indebted to you for my grand invention, as it was
+to the generous patronage of Queen Isabella for the discovery
+of America."
+
+"Pooh!" interrupted Marcus, blushing.
+
+"The praise is none too high," continued the inventor. "It is true, I
+have repaid your advances of money tenfold, by giving you an interest in
+my future but certain fortune. But that does not diminish my gratitude."
+
+Marcus knew that this flattering exordium meant something serious. It
+was a favorite theory of his, that danger, or any kind of anticipated,
+disagreeable thing, was best met halfway. So he said, with a feeble
+attempt at a smile:
+
+"I infer from this ominous opening that you have received another lying
+anonymous letter about me. If I am right, Mr. Minford, be good enough to
+let me see it at once, according to your promise."
+
+"You have guessed correctly, Mr. Wilkeson. I have received a second
+anonymous letter, which I intended showing to you after a further brief
+explanation. But I can readily appreciate your anxiety to read it
+without delay. Here it is." He drew forth a letter, and handed it
+to Marcus.
+
+Marcus immediately recognized the envelope and the address as similar
+to those of the first letter, which he still had in his possession.
+
+He pulled the letter nervously from its yellow sheath, and read as
+follows:
+
+     MR. MINFORD:
+
+     DEAR SIR,--Pardon me for intruding on you a second time. But,
+     as a friend of virtue, I must warn you of continued danger to
+     your daughter from the acquaintance of Mr. Wilkeson, your
+     pretended benefactor. If you are any longer in doubt as to
+     the vile intentions of this man, conceal yourself from
+     observation within sight of Miss Pillbody's school, any fair
+     afternoon, about half past two o'clock, and watch his
+     actions. If his suspicious conduct, at that time and place,
+     does not give a sufficient significance to my warnings, then
+     take the trouble to go to ----, Westchester Co., where he was
+     born, and search into his infamous history. Take heed--I warn
+     you again--lest, in your devotion to science, you forget that
+     you are a father.
+
+     ONE WHO WOULD SHIELD THE INNOCENT.
+
+While reading this letter, Marcus was conscious that the eyes of the
+inventor were fixed piercingly upon him. That consciousness caused his
+head to bow, and his cheeks to crimson with shame. It is the curse of
+this morbid sensibility, that righteous indignation at a foul slander
+upon one's good name springs up only after the victim has shown all the
+accepted evidences of guilt.
+
+There was one reason why a man much less sensitive than Marcus should
+have been thrown off his balance by this letter. It was a fact that
+every afternoon, at half past two o'clock, rain or shine, with
+bachelor-like punctuality, he passed up and down in front of Miss
+Pillbody's school, and looked sentimentally at the closed blinds,
+thinking unutterable things. He was also addicted to standing at the
+hydrant on the corner, and gazing hard at the house, wishing that he
+could see through its brick walls. Then he would cross the street, and
+pace up and down on that side, taking views of the house at every
+variety of angle. This was precisely what the boy Bog did daily about an
+hour and a half later. Now, although Marcus felt, in his heart, that
+these pedestrian exercises--absurd to everybody but a lover--were
+perfectly harmless in their purpose and effect, he was aware that, to a
+man like Mr. Minford, looking at them suspiciously, they would appear to
+be connected with some stealthy and base design.
+
+As to the imputations upon his former history, Marcus could freely
+challenge the closest scrutiny; which is more than most men can do into
+that long record of juvenile frailties and escapades which ushers in the
+sober book of manhood. But here again the devil of sensitiveness
+asserted his supremacy. Marcus had had a twin brother (who died years
+before), a duplicate of himself in all respects but two. Marcus was
+quiet, studious, honest, and frank; while Aurelius was quiet, studious,
+less honest, and infinitely crafty. Marcus had, on several occasions in
+his boyhood, been accused of petty offences which Aurelius had
+committed, but which that cunning youth had unblushingly denied. These,
+so far as Marcus supposed, were nothing more serious than robbing
+orchards or melon patches. Still it was possible that some graver
+wrong--more worthy of the title "infamous"--committed by his wild,
+shrewd brother, might be brought to light by some deep explorer among
+the traditions of his native village, and charged upon himself. This
+possibility, and the difficulty of refuting a serious accusation under
+such circumstances, brought a second flush of guilt to the face of
+Marcus Wilkeson as he read the letter.
+
+These harassing thoughts, which fill so much space, written out, are but
+a small part of those which were suggested with electric suddenness.
+
+Marcus's first impulse was to say: "I love your daughter, Mr. Minford,
+with my whole heart and soul. It is my first and my only love, singular
+though this confession may sound from the lips of a man of thirty-six
+years. The proudest and happiest day of my life would be that on which I
+could marry her, with her dear love and your fatherly consent. This
+love, which is as pure as the angelic creature upon whom it is lavished,
+fully explains my visits here, and whatever else is mysterious in my
+conduct. But, before declaring myself to your daughter, or asking her
+hand of you, I have desired to see whether it were possible to inspire
+her with love for a man so much older than herself. For, much as I love
+her, I would not seek to marry her without a return of love--not mere
+respect, esteem, or gratitude. That is the problem I have been waiting
+to solve."
+
+A confession to this effect was on the tip of his tongue. To have made
+it, would have been like tearing open his breast and showing his heart.
+But he would have made it, whatever the pain, if, on looking nervously
+up from the letter, which he had now finished, he had not met the cold,
+searching eyes of the inventor. He instantly shut his lips upon the
+outcoming confession, and said, with as much indifference as he could
+awkwardly assume:
+
+"I hope, sir, you have taken the trouble to investigate these ridiculous
+charges." But Marcus inwardly hoped he had not.
+
+"I have sir," responded the inventor, gravely. "Had the accusations been
+vague, like those in the first letter from this unknown person, I should
+have dismissed them from my mind with a laugh. But they were so
+specific, and the truth or falsity of them was so easily ascertained,
+that I thought it my duty, in justice to my daughter, yourself, and to
+me, to look into them. It was a painful task, but I have done it."
+
+"And what have you learned?" asked Marcus, making a transparent feint to
+look at ease.
+
+"I will tell you frankly; though I wish to say, in advance, that my
+discoveries, though they might justify some suspicion, do not prejudice
+me in the least against you. I have no doubt that you will be able to
+explain everything." But so spoke not the eyes of the inventor.
+
+"Well, then, to make a short story of this unpleasant affair, I have
+watched your promenades in front of Miss Pillbody's school three
+afternoons in succession. I will spare you the details, though, so
+clearly are your movements back and forth imprinted on my memory, that I
+could recount them all to you, if necessary. It is sufficient to say,
+that I am forced to believe that my daughter is the magnet which draws
+you to that neighborhood, and keeps your eyes riveted on that house.
+This is all I have to say on the first point in the letter."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+IN VAIN--IN VAIN.
+
+This was Marcus Wilkeson's golden opportunity, and he manfully
+determined to seize it. But, as he was on the point of blurting out the
+stifled secret, that cold, pale face--which resembled marble in all but
+the drops of sweat upon the brow--chilled him again. At the same moment,
+the hopeless absurdity of love and marriage between a girl of seventeen
+and a man of thirty-six, occurred to him in all its force. Stupidly
+sensitive being that he was, he thought that this icy, intellectual Mr.
+Minford would laugh at him.
+
+"I confess, sir, that these wanderings seem 'singular,' as you term
+them. But all the habits of old bachelors are regarded as singular, I
+believe. Now, it has been my daily habit, since I retired from business,
+to lay down my book at two o'clock, and take a little out-door exercise.
+Miss Pillbody's school is not far from my house; the street is pretty
+clean for New York, and the sidewalks are tolerably dry. Therefore I
+select that neighborhood for my daily walk--my--my 'constitutional,' as
+they call it. If, in so doing, I should occasionally cast my eyes--in
+fits of absent-mindedness, I may say--on Miss Pillbody's school, that
+is not strange, considering--considering the interest that I take in
+your daughter's education. It strikes me, my dear sir, that this seeming
+suspicion is easily cleared up." Marcus smiled to think how adroitly he
+had extricated himself.
+
+But there was no smile on the shroud-colored face of the inventor.
+
+"The explanation is _plausible_" (Mr. Minford emphasized the word), "and
+I will not attempt to set it aside. God alone knows all the motives of
+human action. Now, to the second, and more serious implication of the
+letter. I have visited your native village, and inquired into your early
+history. Though you moved to the city over fifteen years ago, and have
+returned to your birthplace but once since, so far as I could
+ascertain--"
+
+"Allow me," said Marcus. "My absence from my old home may seem strange,
+but it is occasioned by no shame or disgrace. My father, mother, and
+twin brother died and were buried there. By my father's failure, shortly
+before his death, the old family mansion passed out of his hands, and
+was afterward torn down to make room for a railway depot. This
+extinction of my family--for I am now left without a relation in the
+world, excepting a half-sister--and this destruction of our old home,
+have made my native village horrible to me. When I visited the scene of
+desolation, ten years ago, the village seemed to me like a huge
+graveyard, in every part of which some happiness of my boyhood was
+entombed; and I vowed that I would never go near it again. In the matter
+of family recollections, I am exquisitely sensitive."
+
+"I respect your feelings, sir," said the inventor, "and regret that I
+should be the means of reviving these painful recollections. But I have,
+a duty to perform."
+
+"And I will no longer delay you in its performance. Now be kind enough
+to let me know the worst at once. I can stand it." Marcus unconsciously
+sat up more erect, as if to brace himself against a shock.
+
+"On my arrival in the village, my first act was to seek out some of the
+oldest inhabitants. I found that most of them distinctly remembered you,
+and your brother--Aurelius, I think, was his name. You will pardon me
+for telling you the exact result of my inquiries, but I found that these
+old inhabitants, without a single exception, gave you a very bad name,
+and your brother a very good one."
+
+Marcus was about to explain, that his brother and himself were images of
+each other; that the former was crafty, and full of mischief, and that
+he (Marcus) had been made, on fifty occasions, the innocent scapegoat of
+his brother's little offences. But he forbore. He had cheerfully
+received reprimands, and even chastisements, for his brother while
+living; and he would not blacken his memory when dead. He merely smiled
+a sad smile, and said, "Ah?"
+
+"Many of the offences charged against you by these old gossips, were
+petty and excusable. But there were others, committed by you when you
+were at or near manhood, exhibiting, if true--understand, I say, _if_
+true--a moral depravity for which no extenuation can be found. Some of
+the charges were not sustained by adequate proofs, and those I set down
+as idle rumors. But there was one of which the proof was abundant and
+most positive. No less than five persons gave me circumstantial
+accounts--all agreeing with each other--of your betrayal and ruin of
+Lucy Anserhoff."
+
+"Lucy Anserhoff!" echoed Marcus, in real amazement. "I have a faint
+remembrance of an old lady by that name, and a pretty girl who was her
+daughter. But as God is my judge, I never wronged her." Still there was
+that expression of guilt, which did not escape the scrutinizing glance
+of the inventor.
+
+Marcus could have hunted up evidence to transfer the burden of the
+imputed wrong to the memory of the dead Aurelius. But should he commit
+this profanation of the grave--as he regarded it? The voice of brotherly
+love--for he had tenderly loved his erring brother--said, "No." Would
+any amount of proof satisfy the nervous, doubting man before him? He
+feared not. Therefore Marcus Wilkeson did an act of awful solemnity, to
+prove his innocence. And, because the doing of it thrilled his sensitive
+soul, as if he had thrust himself into the terrible presence of the
+Infinite, he weakly supposed that the most suspicious of men would
+unhesitatingly believe him.
+
+He stood up, turned his eyes to the ceiling, raised both hands, and
+said, in a deep, trembling voice:
+
+"May God strike me dead, if I am guilty of this offence, or any like it,
+or of any thought of wrong toward your daughter."
+
+Marc as sat down, pale, and caught his breath quickly. He was
+awestricken by his own act.
+
+"That is a solemn adjuration," said the inventor, after a short pause,
+"and should not be lightly taken."
+
+Marcus looked well at Mr. Minford. Unbelief was written in every hard
+line and wrinkle of that white, deathlike face. "Do you doubt me now?"
+he asked, sharply. His sensitiveness on the subject of personal honor
+and veracity was painfully acute. He had never told a lie in his life.
+
+"Oh! no," replied Mr. Minford; "I do not say that I doubt you" (in a
+tone expressive of the greatest doubt). "I shall be truly glad to
+receive counter proofs from you."
+
+"You have heard my solemn appeal to God, sir. Between gentlemen of honor
+that should be sufficient."
+
+The inventor's thin lips (from which the last drops of blood had
+disappeared within the last half hour) curved in a satirical smile.
+Marcus interpreted it as a reiterated doubt and a sneer upon his honor.
+For the moment he lost control of his temper, and was about to make a
+remark that he would have regretted immediately after, when the door
+yielded to a gentle pressure, and Pet entered the room.
+
+Her face was pale. Her eyes were dull, and the lids hung droopingly,
+weighed down by twenty-four hours of wakefulness by the bedside of her
+sick teacher. The faint blue crescents beneath--those strange shadows
+of the grave, which sometimes seem the deepest when the eyes above are
+giving the brightest light--imparted a frail, delicate beauty to her
+countenance. They were the last master-touches of Nature in working out
+that portraiture of weaned and sleepy loveliness.
+
+As she put her foot in the room, Mr. Minford and his guest telegraphed a
+truce with their eyes, and assumed a cheerful look.
+
+Little Pet timidly ran to her father, and kissed him, and then shook
+hands with Marcus. He observed a shrinking in her touch. She averted
+her eyes.
+
+"Your clothes are damp, and your feet wet, my darling," said the father,
+
+"Are they?" answered Pet, looking down at her saturated garments and
+glistening shoes. "I had not noticed them. Oh! I am so happy that she is
+well now. The doctor called at the house just before I left, and said
+she was out of all danger. He ordered me home."
+
+"Very sensible of the doctor. Another hour of this watching might have
+killed my poor child."
+
+"So I took a last look at my dear teacher--who was asleep--and kissed
+her, and came right away through the rain."
+
+"It was foolish to do that without an umbrella and overshoes, my child.
+But, as you were always forgetful of yourself, your father will not be
+forgetful of you, at any rate." The inventor glanced significantly at
+Marcus. That glance, so full of distrust, entered his soul. He longed to
+say something--if only a word of common civility--to the young girl;
+but he felt that there was now an impassable barrier between them.
+
+"But what is the matter, Pet?" exclaimed the father. She had dropped
+into a chair, and her head fell on one side. He sprang to catch her. So
+did Marcus. But the inventor reached her first, and seized her in his
+arms, directing another of his speaking looks at Marcus.
+
+Pet roused herself at the touch of her father's hands, sat erect, and
+opened her large blue eyes. "I am so sleepy," she said.
+
+"Of course you are, my blessed; and to bed you must go at once. That is
+my prescription. But, first--always first--a cup of tea."
+
+The inventor darted to the stove, snatched up the teapot, poured out a
+cup of the universal restorer, scalding his forefinger in the hurry,
+milked and sugared it just right, and bore it to his daughter, who was
+nodding again. She drank it dutifully, like medicine.
+
+Children do not comprehend tea. We have to grow up to it. It is the
+appointed balm of fatigued and sorrowing middle age.
+
+In its function of medicine, the strong draught revived her, giving a
+twist to her pretty features, and sending a lively shudder through her
+slender frame. Pet rose from her seat quite briskly.
+
+"Now to bed. To bed at once. No delay. And mind you put on all the
+blankets, and your heavy shawl a-top of them."
+
+"Yes, father."
+
+Marcus blushed, twirled his hat, and made a motion toward the door.
+
+"You need not go, Mr. Wilkeson," said the inventor. "I beg that you will
+not. I wish to settle up that little unfinished business with you
+to-night."
+
+Marcus saw that the inventor was in earnest. He coughed, and hesitated
+what to say.
+
+But, before he could say anything, Pet had kissed her father, and said
+"Good-night," in a faint voice, to the guest, and already had her hand
+on the knob of the door which led to her little sleeping room.
+
+"Remember, darling--all the blankets, and your shawl. To-morrow morning
+you will wake up bright and happy, and ready to enjoy a little surprise
+that I shall have for you." He jerked his thumb toward the machine.
+
+Pet understood him, and smiled sadly. "You need bed more than I,
+father," said she.
+
+"Nonsense, child!" replied the old man, with a hollow laugh. "It is not
+for the patient to prescribe to the physician. There, good-night, now."
+
+He kissed her again with more tenderness. "Remember," said he, "there is
+a little surprise in store for you to-morrow."
+
+Pet said, "Heaven bless you, father," murmured another "Good-night," and
+disappeared within her sanctuary, closing the door after her.
+
+"Now, Mr. Wilkeson," said the inventor, "we can finish our
+conversation."
+
+His voice sounded like a voice from the tomb.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+THE CLASHING ORBS.
+
+The rain had ceased, and the moon was out. The dark, massy clouds that
+floated between her and the earth were doing their ghostly,
+phantasmagoric work. At one moment, clear, white light, like a shroud;
+at another moment, darkness, like a pall. An owl, lighting on the spire
+of Grace Church in his flight over the city, might have seen the white
+edge of the shroud, or the black edge of the pall, advancing in
+well-defined lines over the housetops, and the parks, and the two
+rivers, swiftly succeeding each other.
+
+It was as if the mighty invisible demons of the night were capriciously
+trying the effects of cerements on the sleeping city. It was as if they
+were perplexed between the soft beauty of the shroud and the sombre
+majesty of the pall. A woman could not have tried on two shawls more
+often and more indecisively, before making up her mind to buy.
+
+Little Pet's sleeping room, like every room that faced the south, that
+night, was full of strange, spectral effects. The scrolls and the roses
+on the cheap yellow curtains that hung in the windows, were changed to
+hideous faces of variable size and ugliness. Their grotesque shadows on
+the floor mingled with other faces--horrible as antique masks--wrought
+by the magic of the moon from the gigantic flowers that adorned the
+narrow strip of carpet by the bedside. Her dresses, suspended from a row
+of hooks in the corner--and showing, in gentle swells and curves, the
+lithe, graceful form of the little wearer, like moulds,--would have
+looked to any open eye, that dreadful night, like women hanging against
+the wall. This startling idea would have been helped along by two or
+three shadowy bonnets depending from pegs above them. The white
+somethings carelessly tossed over a chair near the head of the bed, were
+no longer the garments of youth, beauty, and innocence, but
+graveclothes, cold, shining, shuddering, in that deathly light. The
+touch of the moon, like the presence of a sexton, suggested mortality.
+
+The narrow, single bed, with its four black posts, looked like the fatal
+trestle, or bier. The slender body which lay upon it was still as death.
+The head nestled motionless in a deep indentation of the pillow. A
+slanting ray of the moon, coming between one of the window curtains and
+the window, fell upon the face, and showed it white and waxen; the lips,
+still red, parted to the gleaming teeth; and the eyes not quite covered
+by the lids. One beautiful round arm curved above her head, and some of
+her soft brown hair rested in the little open palm. The other stretched
+down toward the centre of the bed, as if fearlessly to invite the touch
+of those weird things with which imagination peoples the solemn
+night--which the wakeful eye, in the still, small hours, sees moving in
+the darker corners, or passing swiftly by the bedside, or hovering in
+the air, wearing the semblance of one's dead friends, or filling large
+portions of the room with some formless presence of unutterable
+malignity and woe.
+
+It was only sleep to which the moon thus gave the pale polish of death.
+The gentle murmur of a childish breath broke the silence. The heavy
+bedclothes slowly rose and fell with the mysterious pulsations of warm
+life beneath. At intervals, a shudder shook the little figure of the
+sleeper, her breath came louder and quicker, and her arms moved with
+sudden starts. Pet was dreaming, under the joint influences of an excess
+of blankets and a cup of strong tea.
+
+She was alone in infinite space. Above, below, on all sides, was a
+leaden atmosphere. Neither sun, nor moon, nor stars illumined it, but
+only some dull, phosphorescent light, which seemed to be born of the
+murky, stagnant air. It was such a strange, sickly, wavering gleam as
+she had seen above decaying wood, fish, and other substances. All around
+was absolute stillness. Not a swallow waved his wing nor an insect
+hummed in that barren immensity. Nature was hushed by some deadly spell.
+
+Yet the dread silence portended the near approach of HORRORS. She knew
+what they were, for she had been in this frightful region often before,
+and was familiar with its dread phenomena. They came. They were only two
+little black specks--like motes in the sunbeams--scarcely visible to her
+strained vision at first. She gazed upon them with the fascination of a
+charmed bird on the two small jet eyes of a serpent; but with this
+difference, that she knew the terrible peril that they brought. The
+moment that these two motes became visible to her in that dimly lighted
+mist, they commenced revolving around each other.
+
+They revolved slowly, and increased in size as they rolled on. The
+slowness of the motion and the swelling of the motes were elements of
+horror. But she could not take her eyes from those two black objects
+revolving like binary stars, until her breath should cease to come and
+go, and her heart to beat. As the motes enlarged, their orbits widened.
+And they grew and-grew, performing greater and more awful
+circuits--still slowly, still noiselessly. The eternal, unbroken silence
+was another element of horror. The doomed spectatress of this solemn,
+maddening whirl would fain have shrieked, or even whispered, to break
+the silence, but she could not. Either her powers of articulation had
+disappeared in that region of universal dumbness, or the dead atmosphere
+was waveless, and could vibrate to no sound. She knew, by harrowing
+experience, the scene that was to come, and she prayed inwardly to God
+to strengthen her for it.
+
+The two black objects swelled and swelled in even proportions, until
+they became as large as a full moon just seen above the horizon; then to
+the size of two full moons, and a dozen, and a hundred, and a thousand.
+Still black, still noiseless, still revolving slowly, like a tardy but
+certain doom. Then a quarter of the leaden space was filled with their
+gigantic bodies, and the lurid air was darker. Then a half of the
+heavens was blotted out; She grew faint and sick, as she moved her head
+to the right and left, and up and down, and watched the dizzy
+revolutions of those vast orbs, between which she knew that she was to
+be crushed at last, as by the nether and upper millstones. Her
+inarticulate cries to God were unheard. It seemed as if there were no
+God for that accursed part of the universe.
+
+Majestically, slowly, silently ever, the orbs increased. Two strips of
+the sky could be seen constantly changing positions, but always opposite
+to each other. These were the gaps, fast narrowing, which were to be
+filled up by the swelling worlds before her destruction was
+accomplished. Her long familiarity with the movements of this stupendous
+enginery of death enabled her to calculate to a nicety when the crash
+would come. She lay like the bound victim under the guillotine, watching
+fer the axe to descend.
+
+The blackness of darkness above and beneath and around her ... a
+suffocating compression of the stagnant air ... a thrilling
+consciousness of the close approach of the two cruel orbs.... a
+superlative stillness ... and then a mighty attrition, in which the
+mortal part of the poor girl was about to be ground to atoms, when she
+... awoke.
+
+She threw back the heavy blankets that oppressed her chest, as if
+_they_ were the crushing danger. She looked overhead, expecting to see a
+whirling globe within a foot of her face. But she saw only the ceiling,
+made visible by the pallid light of the room. Then she knew that she was
+in her own little room, and that this frightful adventure was only the
+old, old dream, that came to her two or three times a year, as far back
+as she could remember--the same always, without addition or curtailment.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+A VISION OF HORRORS.
+
+Little Pet was not the least superstitious; because her father had
+taught her from infancy to pay no heed to dreams or signs; and because
+he had allowed no housemaid or fussy old woman to inoculate his young
+daughter with her own senseless and cowardly fears. Pet smiled at the
+momentary terror which the strange old dream had caused, closed her
+eyes, and addressed herself again to sleep. But, first, she drew up the
+weighty blankets over her little frame, as her father had told her to
+do. She had already found out by experience, that a hot application of
+blankets was the best remedy for a young cold.
+
+A low murmur, as of conversation, came from the adjoining room. Then she
+remembered that Mr. Wilkeson was there when she had come to bed. She
+said to herself: "It cannot be late; for he never stops after ten
+o'clock." Then she began to think of some matters which had recently
+perplexed and distressed her greatly. But she was so sleepy, that the
+thoughts came into her little head confusedly, and, several times,
+merged into dreams, and then came out again. The low murmur of the talk
+outside, like the distant hum of a waterfall or a mill, was sedative.
+The act of listening to it--as she did for a few moments with natural
+curiosity--was provocative of sleep.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The conversation suddenly grew louder. The hollow voice of the inventor,
+and the deep bass of Marcus Wilkeson, could be heard alternating
+quickly. These words reached little Pet:
+
+THE INVENTOR. "We have had along conversation, Mr. Wilkeson, and I will
+end it by saying that it is best for us to separate, now and forever."
+
+MARCUS (_bitterly_). "As you please, sir; but it is hard that a man's
+reputation should be at the mercy of any scoundrel who knows how to
+write a libel, and has not courage enough to acknowledge it."
+
+THE INVENTOR (_pettishly_). "I have told you a dozen times, that I
+despise anonymous letter writers. They are ever liars and cowards."
+
+MARCUS. "But you respected this one enough to adopt his suggestions."
+
+THE INVENTOR. "So the magistrate uses hints that may be furnished him by
+professional thieves, for the detection of crime. But he, none the less,
+loathes those who would inform upon their comrades."
+
+MARCUS. "You believe, therefore, only what you have seen or heard for
+yourself."
+
+THE INVENTOR. "Nothing further, I assure you. In all matters of proof,
+it is my nature to be suspicious."
+
+MARCUS. "But none of these accusations against me have been proved."
+
+THE INVENTOR. "Why protract this painful conversation? It is sufficient
+for me to say that we must part.--(_Excitedly_.) Good heavens, sir! am I
+not the guardian of my daughter, and warranted in accepting or rejecting
+acquaintances for her? Must I make long explanations to everybody that I
+don't see fit to admit into my house and my daughter's society? Is not
+this a free country, sir?"
+
+MARCUS _(with deep despair in his voice_). "Perfectly free, sir. I admit
+your rights. And I hereby pledge myself not to intrude upon you or
+her--at least, until you are convinced of the great injustice of your
+conduct toward me, and invite me again to your house. But there is one
+thing more!"
+
+THE INVENTOR (_impatiently_). "One thing more! will this dialogue never
+end? Well, sir. What the devil is it?" Then he added, as if aware of the
+coarseness and gross impropriety of that expression. "Excuse me, sir,
+but it is late, and my machine is waiting."
+
+MARCUS (_slowly and firmly_). "One moment, sir. I have sworn my
+innocence before God, with the most solemn oath known to man. I may have
+misconstrued your remarks, but I thought you still doubted me. It is my
+misfortune to be extremely sensitive upon the point of honor. Having
+relinquished your acquaintance and that of--of--your daughter, it is now
+my duty to ask whether you presume to question my oath?"
+
+THE INVENTOR (_with increased impatience_). "Why should I be bored with
+this cross-examination? I have never said I doubted your oath."
+
+MARCUS (_quickly_). "That is not an answer. Do you believe me, or
+disbelieve me? Am I a liar and perjurer, or not? In one word; yes,
+or no!"
+
+THE INVENTOR (_laughing nervously_). "Will you bully me in my own house,
+sir? There is the door. Out of it!"
+
+There was a noise like the opening of a door.
+
+MARCUS (_between his teeth_). "Never, sir. Never, until you retract your
+imputation upon my honor."
+
+THE INVENTOR (_losing all control of himself_). "Curse your honor. If
+you had been more careful of it in your native village--where you are
+best known--it would not trouble you now. Come, there are the stairs."
+
+MARCUS. "Once more. Do you believe my oath, or not?"
+
+THE INVENTOR (_shouting_). "No! no! a million times, no! since you drive
+me to it. I believe you to be a crafty scoundrel, who has been trying to
+ruin my daughter. Out, sir, now--out!"
+
+Then was a sound of two men clenching, and struggling toward the door.
+A noise followed like that caused by the sharp closing of the door; but
+the two men were still in the room, for their scuffling and their short,
+quick grunts of exertion could be heard with increased distinctness. The
+noise indicated that one was pushing the other toward the centre of the
+room. Then followed the dull, nauseating sound of blows, apparently
+struck with fists upon heads and chests, mingled with noisier but still
+partly suppressed groans, and defiances.
+
+The conversation which preceded this struggle, had come to Pet's ears
+with such distinctness, and made such a terrifying impression upon her
+mind, that it seemed as if she could see the combatants.
+
+At the time when the clenching commenced, the vision was faint, as if
+she were looking into a dark room. But, as the struggle proceeded, the
+room seemed to be gradually lighted up for her; and every grapple, every
+blow, every facial contortion of this horrible contest, were plainly
+visible. And yet she was not in the room, but lying in her little bed,
+bound as in the awful dream of the clashing orbs. She knew she was
+there, and yet she felt that her eyes, all her faculties of observation,
+had been somehow transferred to her father's room, and that she was
+actually seeing and hearing the commission of a murder there.
+
+She tried to cry aloud, but her jaws were closed. She would have risen,
+entered the room, and thrown herself between the frenzied men, but
+neither hand nor foot could she move. Her body was fastened to the bed
+as if with adamantine chains, while her mind and soul were the voiceless
+spectators of a tragedy of which she knew that she was the cause. She
+could not even open her eyes. If she could have loosed but a muscle from
+the rigidity of the trance, she knew that her whole frame would be
+relaxed in an instant. Then she would have bounded--oh! with what
+speed--into the other room, where her immortal part was helplessly
+watching the conflict, and interceded at the risk of her life. Alas!
+Prometheus was tied to the rock not more firmly than she to that bed
+of anguish!
+
+The struggle went on. The inventor, though past the prime of life, and
+worn down by excessive thought, had some strength left. Its duration was
+brief; but it was not to be despised while it lasted. He grasped the
+tall figure of Marcus Wilkeson by the neck with one arm, and with the
+other struck dozens of blows upon his face and chest. The comparative
+youth and freshness of Marcus were unable to free him from the strong
+hold of this vigorous old man. Pangs of terror shot through the heart of
+the poor girl as she saw that her father was about to become a murderer.
+Then the tide of fortune changed. Marcus, bruised and black in the face,
+and panting with exertion, released himself from the inventor's clutch,
+and, in turn, caught him by the throat. With his long arm he held the
+furious old man at a safe distance. The unhappy girl was now agonized
+with fears for her father's life.
+
+"This is madness. Let us stop it." Thus Pet heard Marcus Wilkeson say,
+in panting accents.
+
+What demoniac spell was it that prevented her from shrieking--"Stop it.
+In God's name, father, stop?"
+
+"Never!" said the undaunted old man. "Never, till I have thrown you
+headlong down stairs! Liar! Villain!"
+
+With that, Pet saw her father hurl himself, with the ferocity of a
+tiger, on Marcus Wilkeson. Such was the suddenness and impetuosity of
+the movement, that Marcus was pushed back several feet toward the door,
+from the centre of the room, where the most obstinate part of the
+struggle had taken place.
+
+But the old man's supremacy was short lived. The younger and stronger
+man suddenly stooped, caught the inventor with both hands under the
+arms, and thrust him toward the corner occupied by the mysterious
+machine. The inventor would have fallen on it, and perhaps have been
+instantly killed by contact with some portion of the brass or iron work,
+but for the interposition of the screen. This broke his fall. He
+scrambled to his feet, full of rage, and foaming at the mouth.
+
+Marcus stepped back, and said, "Now let it cease."
+
+Pet saw her father snatch something that looked like a club, from some
+part of the machine.
+
+"This is my answer," he said, and precipitated himself with fresh fury
+upon Marcus.
+
+The younger man had expected the attack, and braced himself for it. He
+caught the inventor by the arm that held the club, or other weapon. They
+wrestled for its possession--the inventor with frenzy in every feature,
+Marcus with fixed determination, and silently.
+
+The weapon was now aloft--now below--now shifted in the twinkling of an
+eye to the right, and now to the left. At one time the inventor seemed
+to be on the point of securing it; at another, Marcus. Suddenly Pet saw
+it whirl like a shillelah above her father's head, with a strange noise
+like the quick winding of a clock. Then she heard a dull sound, as of
+striking a board with a brick, and--she saw her father fall to the
+floor. At the same moment, the light in the room went out, and all
+was darkness.
+
+The pent-up agony at last found utterance. She shrieked, and, instantly,
+her eyes were open, and her limbs free. She jumped out of bed, and was
+about to rush into the chamber of horrors, when she saw the bright light
+of the gas yet shining through the crack beneath her door. She listened.
+The house was still as the grave. Not a sound from all the world
+outside, except the striking of a fire alarm for the seventh district.
+The deep notes vibrated upon her quickened hearing like a knell.
+
+Then she remembered that, in the vision, the light had disappeared. Here
+it was gleaming under her door as brightly as ever. "Pshaw! what a silly
+girl I am!" said she. "It was a nightmare. That's all." She raised her
+hands to her face. It was hot and dripping.
+
+"Father prescribed too large a dose of blankets. No wonder I had this
+horrid dream."
+
+But, notwithstanding the presence of the light, and the absence of all
+noise, such as would be caused by the murderer in leaving the room and
+going down stairs, the impression of this tragic vision upon her mind
+was not to be dismissed with a "Pshaw!"
+
+Pet would have derived much relief from opening the door and looking in,
+and seeing, with her own waking eyes, that her father was alive, at his
+usual seat in the corner. She placed her hand upon the latch.
+
+But then she remembered how her father had laughed at her, two or three
+times before, when she was a younger girl, and not so wise as now, and
+had rushed into his room screaming with fright from a nightmare. She
+prided herself on having outgrown childish fears.
+
+She also remembered that her father had told her, two days before, that
+he was engaged in the most difficult mathematical calculations, day and
+night, and, kissing her, had playfully said that she must not
+disturb him.
+
+"He is thinking over his problems now," thought little Pet. "Dear
+father! I _do_ wish he would give up that hateful machine. It will be
+the death of him. But he said I must not disturb him, and I will not.
+Mr. Wilkeson must have gone home a long time ago; and dear father is
+thinking, as he calls it, with his hand on his forehead, in the old
+corner. Let me take one little peep through the keyhole, and go to
+bed again."
+
+Pet stooped, and looked through the keyhole. Within her range were the
+chair where Marcus Wilkeson had sat that evening, and the nail
+where--with bachelor-like precision--he always hung his hat. Neither
+Marcus Wilkeson nor his hat were in their accustomed, places. "What
+silly things these dreams are!" thought little Pet. The keyhole did not
+command the corner of the room where the machine stood, and where the
+inventor pondered and toiled; but Pet felt as certain that he was there,
+coaxing thoughts out of his pale brow with that habitual caress of the
+hand, as if she had seen him.
+
+"Good night, dear father," she whispered, softly. "May Heaven watch over
+your labors, and keep you from all harm."
+
+With this pious prayer, she slid into her warm nest. But, before
+adjusting her limbs for sleep, she threw off a portion of the heavy
+blankets which had weighed upon her, and was soon sound asleep, and
+dreaming of a garden in which all the roses were beautiful new bonnets.
+
+Still the moon played her ghastly metamorphoses in the little chamber.
+And the figures on the carpet and the figures on the curtain writhed in
+horrible contortions of glee, as if they rejoiced over a calamity which
+had befallen that house.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+WHAT THE MORNING BROUGHT.
+
+The child woke about seven o'clock. She knew the time by the sun's rays
+upon the window curtains. In that strong, cheerful light, the phantom
+faces had shrunk back to great red bunches of flowers again. She thought
+of the absurd dream, or vision, as of something that had happened ages
+ago, and wondered that she had been foolish enough to be frightened
+by it.
+
+There was no noise in her father's room. But that was not strange, for
+he rarely retired to bed before three o'clock in the morning (even when
+he did not sit up all night), and slept till eight. His sleep, though
+short, was sound; and it was Pet's custom to prepare breakfast in her
+father's room without waking him.
+
+She washed her face, which looked rosy and bewitching in the little
+cracked mirror, and dressed her hair in two simple bands down the
+cheeks, and put on a white calico dress with small red spots, and a
+white apron bound with blue. This was the dress that her father loved
+the best. She looked in the glass, and examined her damaged reflection
+with a charming coquetry, and said, "Pet, child, you are looking well
+to-day. Now for breakfast."
+
+Pet walked to the door, humming her last music lesson in a low voice.
+
+She placed her hand upon the latch, and opened the door softly. As it
+swung on its hinges, and she began to obtain a glimpse of the room, she
+noticed the gas still burning, though the daylight filled the apartment.
+This was strange. A shudder passed through her frame, and her cheeks
+began to pale.
+
+"Pooh! what nonsense!" she said. She pushed the door wide open.
+
+Was it another mocking, maddening vision that she saw? She rubbed her
+eyes in wild affright, and then raised her hands aloft with a
+piercing shriek.
+
+There, before her, lay the dead body of her father. In the centre of his
+ghastly forehead was a small wound, from which the blood had trickled
+over the temples, bedabbling his thin gray hairs, and forming a small
+red pool by his side. Near him, on the floor, was a club with an iron
+tip, which had done the dreadful deed. She recognized it at once as a
+part of the machine.
+
+The monstrous vision of the night was true! Her father was dead! Mr.
+Wilkeson was his murderer! She was an orphan!
+
+These agonizing thoughts flashed through her brain in the single
+instant. She felt her head turning, and her limbs failing under her. She
+had only strength to shriek, "Murder! murder! Help! help!" and then she
+fell headlong and senseless upon her father's dead body.
+
+
+
+BOOK SEVENTH.
+
+JOURNEYINGS AGAINST FATE.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+PEA-SHOOTING AS A SCIENCE.
+
+Be it said to the credit of Wesley Tiffles, that he always paid bills
+promptly when he could borrow money to do it. The funds that he had
+raised from Marcus Wilkeson, and others, for the panorama, had been
+faithfully applied to that great object. If he could have borrowed money
+from other people to repay those loans, that act of financial justice
+would also have been done; and so on without end, like a round robin.
+
+When Tiffles bestowed the last instalment of compensation upon Patching,
+that individual shrugged his shoulders, and smiled. "The paltry price of
+artistic degradation," said he. "Remember, I would have done this job
+only for a friend. The world must not know it is a Patching--though I
+fear that even on this hasty daub I have left marks of my style which
+will betray me."
+
+"You are safe, my dear fellow," said Tiffles. "I have already ordered
+the posters and bills; and the name of Andrea Ceccarini will appear
+thereon as the artist. Ceccarini has an Italian look, which is an
+advantage; and, you will pardon me for saying, is rather more imposing
+than Patching."
+
+The artist was sensitive touching his name. It had been punned upon in
+some of the comic papers. He could not take offence at the innocent
+remark of a friend, but he felt hurt, and vindictively rammed the large
+roll of one-dollar bills into his vest pocket without counting them.
+(Whenever it was practicable, Tiffles paid his debts in bills of that
+denomination. He had a theory that the amount looked larger, and was
+more satisfactory to the receiver.)
+
+As Tiffles saw how lightly the artist regarded the money, not even
+counting it, he felt a momentary pang at the thought that he had
+paid him.
+
+The panorama of Africa had not only been finished and paid for, but it
+had been exhibited to a large number of clergymen of all denominations,
+at the lecture room of an up-town church. The clergymen, being debarred
+from attending secular amusements, as a class, had gladly accepted the
+invitation of "Professor Wesley" (Tiffles's panoramic name), and brought
+with them their wives and a number of children apiece.
+
+The panorama was rigged up at the end of the lecture room, in front of
+the desk, under the personal supervision of a former assistant of
+Banvard's, and worked beautifully, saving an occasional squeak in
+the rollers.
+
+Tiffles, in his character of Professor Wesley, told his story glibly and
+with perfect coolness, interspersing the heavier details with amusing
+anecdotes, which made the ministers smile, and brought out a loud titter
+of laughter from the ministers' wives, and tremendous applause,
+inclusive of stamping and the banging of hymn books, from the
+ministers' children.
+
+One of the children, with the love of mischief peculiar to that division
+of the human family, had provided himself with peas, and, taking
+advantage of the partial darkness in which the panorama was exhibited,
+shot those missiles with practised aim at Professor Wesley, and now and
+then hit him in the face. The lecturer kept in good humor; and when,
+after a smart volley of peas, Rev. Dr. A---- arose, and suggested that
+these disturbances were disgraceful, and, although he did not wish to
+meddle with the household government of his brethren, he thought that
+the children who were guilty of such outrages ought to be taken home,
+soundly whipped, and put to bed--when Rev. Dr. A----, moved by just
+indignation, did this, the lecturer smiled, and blandly said: Oh, no; he
+wasn't annoyed in the least (at the same time receiving a pea on his
+left cheek). He would trust to the generosity of his young friends not
+to fire their peas too hard; and he hoped that the reverend gentleman
+would withdraw his suggestion.
+
+Cries of "All right, brother!" "We'll keep the boys quiet!" "Go on! go
+on!" went up from all parts of the room. Rev. Dr. A----, yielding to the
+pressure, sat down, and received, at that moment, one pea on the right
+eye of his gold spectacles, and another square on the end of his nose.
+The two peas were fired by his second son John, who had been delivering
+this invisible artillery all the evening from the other end of the
+identical pew in which the Rev. Dr. was seated. He groaned in the
+spirit, and muttered something to Mrs. Rev. Dr. A---- about the
+degeneracy of other people's children, which made that lady chuckle low,
+under cover of the night; for she knew that her second son John was the
+pea-shooter, and had made vain efforts to stop him, by pinching his leg,
+though the good matron could not help laughing at every fine shot
+achieved by her promising boy.
+
+Professor Wesley "went on," as requested, and so did the pea-shooting,
+until John's stock of ammunition gave out.
+
+The lecturer had ransacked the Society, Astor, and Mercantile libraries,
+and stuffed himself with facts touching the interior of Africa, so far
+as that mystery had been explored. Fortified with these facts, and a
+lively imagination, he found no difficulty in satisfying the curiosity
+of his auditors on every point; and answered questions of all sorts,
+which were fired at him even thicker than the peas, without the least
+hesitation.
+
+When the exhibition was over, every clergyman present signed a
+certificate declaring that they had been highly entertained and
+instructed by the Panorama of Africa, and Mr. Wesley's able lecture;
+that they considered the painting a masterpiece of moral Art, and
+cordially recommended it to the patronage of an enlightened public.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+BY STEAM.
+
+Tiffles had selected, as his first field of active operations, the State
+of New Jersey. His large number of relatives (the Tiffleses were
+prolific on the female side) and friends, and occasional creditors,
+scattered through New England and New York, effectually barred him from
+all that territory. New Jersey, then Pennsylvania, then the West--those
+were the great topographical features of his campaign.
+
+For his initiatory performance, he had chosen a quiet little town less
+than thirty miles from the city, on a line of railway. If his panorama
+was to be a hopeless failure at the very outset, Tiffles wanted to be
+within striking distance of New York. He was sanguine of success; but,
+like a prudent general, he looked after his lines of retreat.
+
+To this small town in New Jersey, with which the fate of the great
+enterprise was to be indissolubly linked, Tiffles had sent a large stock
+of posters and handbills. He had previously corresponded (free of
+expense both ways) with that universal business man of every American
+village, the postmaster, and, through him, had engaged Washington
+Hall--the largest hall in the place, capable of holding six hundred
+people--at five dollars for one night, with the refusal of two
+nights more.
+
+The name of the hall and the night of exhibition were written in blank
+spaces on the posters and handbills with red chalk, in a fine commercial
+hand, by Tiffles himself; and, for a small consideration, the postmaster
+had agreed to stick up the posters on every corner; also on the post
+office and the three town pumps; and to distribute the handbills in
+every house. These labors the P.M. did not undertake to perform
+personally--though he had plenty of leisure for them, as well as for the
+local defence of the National Administration, which was his peculiar and
+official function--but he turned them over to a semi-idiot, who
+occasionally did jobs of that kind, and who was willing to trust for his
+pay to the coming of Professor Wesley.
+
+The last letter from the postmaster ran thus:
+
+     Yure's of the 6th reseved, and contense, including for my
+     pussenel expenses, dooly noted, Washinton Hall has been moped
+     out for you and is clene as a pin, six new tin cannel sticks
+     have been put up in the antyrum by the propryetor, this is
+     lyberul, all the hanbils has been distributid, and the
+     posters stuck up, sum of em wrong side down, owin to the
+     bilposter bein a little week-minded, which will be a kind of
+     curosity, and an advantije to you I think. I have sent
+     tickets to the village pastures and their famylis, as yu
+     requested and they red the notises last Sunday and advised
+     everybuddy to go. I have gut public opinion all rite for yu
+     here, now cum on with yer panyrammer of Afriky.
+
+     Yure's trooly,
+
+     B. PERSIMMON, p.m.
+
+This was cheering; and Tiffles only hoped that he would be able to
+secure so faithful an ally in every postmaster, for he had decided to do
+this preliminary work through that variety of public functionary, until
+the success of the panorama would justify hiring a special courier to go
+in advance and smooth the way for him,
+
+All these preparations having been satisfactorily made; and the
+panorama, with the curtains, the lighting apparatus, and the other
+properties, having been forwarded in three enormous boxes to the scene
+of the impending conflict with public opinion, Tiffles made ready to
+follow. And, on the eventful morning of the----- of April, 185-, he
+might have been seen at the Cortlandt-street ferry, accompanied by
+Patching, who had graciously consented to see how the "thing worked" on
+its first public trial.
+
+Patching pulled his enormous hat still farther over his eyes, so that he
+might not be recognized. This gave him an extremely questionable aspect;
+and the ticket taker at the ferry peered under the huge brim
+suspiciously as Patching came in. He also attracted the attention of a
+detective in citizen's clothes, and was a general object of interest to
+all the people congregated in the ferry house and waiting for the boat.
+
+"This is fame," muttered Patching, glancing at his scrutinizers from the
+shadow of the far-reaching hat. "This is what people starve and die for.
+It is a bore." He struck an attitude, as if unconsciously, folding his
+arms, and appearing to be in a profound revery. Then, after another
+cautious glance about, he turned to Tiffles, by his side, and said:
+
+"It is useless. I am recognized. But remember your solemn promise. I had
+no hand in the painting of it."
+
+"Not a little finger, my dear fellow," cheerfully replied Tiffles, who
+had given the artist similar assurances of secrecy five times
+that morning.
+
+At that moment a hand touched Tiffles familiarly on the shoulder. He
+turned suddenly, for he was always expecting rear attacks from
+creditors. He saw Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+"Best of friends," said Tiffles, with unfeigned joy, "I am glad to see
+you. Of course you are going with us, though I hardly dared hope as much
+when I sent you the invitation."
+
+"To tell the truth, Tiffles, I had no intention of going, till this
+morning, when it suddenly occurred to me that a little trip in the
+country, and the fun of seeing your panorama and hearing you lecture,
+would drive away the blues. I had a bad fit of them last night."
+
+Here Patching turned, and looked Marcus in the face, without seeming to
+recognize him. It was his habit (not a singular one among the human
+species) to pretend not to remember people, and to wait for the first
+word. Marcus indulged in the same habit to some extent, and, when he saw
+Patching looking at him without a nod or a word, he also was blank and
+speechless.
+
+"Don't you remember each other?" said Tiffles. "Mr. Patching. Mr. Marcus
+Wilkeson."
+
+The gentlemen shook hands, and said:
+
+"Oh, yes! How do you do? It is a fine morning. Very."
+
+"So much paler than when I last saw you, that I didn't know you,
+positively. Little ill, sir?" asked Patching. The artist was sure to
+observe and speak of any signs of illness on the faces of his friends
+and acquaintances. Some people called him malevolent for it.
+
+To be told that one looks pale, always makes one turn paler. Marcus,
+extra sensitive on the point of looks, became quite pallid, and said,
+with confusion:
+
+"I have not been well for several days, and my rest was badly broken
+last night."
+
+Tiffles had also remarked the unusual deadly whiteness of his friend's
+complexion, and the air of lassitude and unhappiness which pervaded his
+face, but he would not have alluded to them for the world. He never made
+impertinent observations of that sort.
+
+"Unwell?" said Tiffles. "I had not noticed it. In the morning, all New
+York looks as if it had just come out of a debauch. Wilkeson will pass,
+I guess." This calumny upon the city was Tiffles's favorite bit of
+satire, and it had cheered up many a poor fellow who thought himself
+looking uncommonly haggard.
+
+Marcus smiled languidly, and turned away his head with a sigh. As his
+eyes swept about, they encountered the gaze of the man in citizen's
+clothes, previously noticed. At first, Marcus thought he had seen this
+man somewhere before; and then he thought he was mistaken. The man
+evinced no recognition of Marcus, and, an instant after, his sharp
+glance wandered to some other person in the large group waiting for
+the boat.
+
+Here the boat came into the slip, and, after bumping in an uncertain way
+against the piles on either side, neared almost within leaping distance
+of the wharf. A solid crowd of passengers stood at the edge of the boat,
+with their eyes fixed on the landing place, as if it were the soil of a
+new world upon which they were to leap for the first time, like a party
+of Columbuses When the distance had been diminished to about four feet,
+the front row of passengers jumped ashore, and rushed wildly up the
+street, as if impelled by a rocket-like power from behind. These people
+could not have been more eager to get ashore, if they had come from the
+other side of the globe on business involving a million apiece, to be
+transacted on that day only.
+
+In fact, they were only lawyers, tradesmen, mechanics, and clerks,
+living in Jersey City, and going over to New York on their daily,
+humdrum business. It was not the business that attracted them, but the
+demon of American restlessness that pushed them on. They went back at
+night in just the same hurry, and made equally hazardous jumps on the
+Jersey side. They were mere shuttlecocks between the battledoors of
+Jersey City and New York.
+
+Tiffles and Patching lifted up the thin carpet bags which reposed at
+their feet, and which contained an exceedingly small amount of personal
+linen and other attire, and went on board the boat, followed by Marcus,
+who was unencumbered with baggage. They entered the ladies' cabin. The
+thick crowd of people pressed into the cabin in their front and rear,
+and all about them, and scrambled for seats. There was a general
+preference for the part forward of the wheelhouse, because it was a few
+feet nearer New Jersey than the aft part. The rush to obtain these
+preferred places was like that of the opera-going world for the front
+row of boxes at a _matinee_. Ladies who obtained eligible seats, settled
+themselves in them, spread out their dresses, put their gloved hands in
+position, and smiled with a sweet satisfaction at ladies who had got no
+seats. Those ladies, in turn, looked reproachfully at the gentlemen who
+were comfortably seated. And those gentlemen, with the exception of a
+few who rose and gracefully offered their seats to the youngest and
+prettiest of the ladies, in turn looked out of the windows, or at the
+floor, or at a paper, intently.
+
+A stranger to the ferry boats and customs of the country would have
+supposed that the passengers were bound for Europe instead of the
+opposite shore of North River.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson, Times, and Patching did not participate in this contest
+for seats, but walked through the fetid and stifling cabins to the
+forward deck, where fresh, bracing air, glorious sunlight, and a cheery
+view of the river were to be had. But these charms of nature were
+apparently thrown away on the trio. They all leaned over the railing,
+and, looked steadily into the water. Times was thinking up his lecture,
+and other matters of the panorama. Patching was misanthropically
+reviewing his career, and exulting in future triumphs over his
+professional enemies. Marcus was engrossed with some sad theme which,
+once or twice, brought tears into his eyes. A burst of noble music, a
+fine sentiment in a poem, a poor woman crying, keen personal
+disappointment, or any acute mental trouble, had this strange effect on
+the optics of Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+The bell rang; voices shouted, "All aboard!" the gangplank was drawn in;
+several belated people jumped on, at the risk of their lives, after the
+boat had left the wharf, one man vaulting over ten feet; and the voyage
+for Jersey was commenced.
+
+Three minutes later, the inmates of the cabins began to go forward and
+pick favorable positions for jumping off on the other side. The scramble
+to evacuate the seats then was as sharp as the scramble to possess them,
+three minutes before. A few more rounds of the wheels, and the boat
+thumped in the usual way against one row of piles at the entrance of the
+Jersey slip, and then caromed like a billiard ball on the other, each
+time nearly knocking the passengers off their feet, and shaking a small
+chorus of screams out of the ladies.
+
+When the boat was within a yard of the wharf, the jumping commenced; and
+all the able-bodied men, most of the boys, and some of the ladies, were
+off before the boat butted with tremendous force against the wharf,
+shaking both wharf and boat to their foundations, and giving to the
+people on both a parting jar, which they carried in their bones for the
+rest of the day.
+
+Once safely on the wharf, the scramble was continued in various
+directions and for various objects. Marcus, Tiffles, and Patching
+indulged in the eccentricity of not scrambling; and, when they reached
+the Erie Railroad cars, they found every seat taken, some by two
+persons, but many by one lady and a bandbox or carpet bag, which was
+intended to signify to the inquiring eye that the lawful human occupant
+of that half of the seat was absent, but might be expected to come in
+and claim it at any moment.
+
+The three companions understood this conventional imposture, and
+politely claimed the spare half seats from the nearest ladies. The fair
+occupants looked forbidding, and slowly removed their bandboxes,
+baskets, and other parcels, to the floor beneath, or the rack overhead;
+and the disturbers of their peace and comfort ruthlessly took the
+vacated seats, with a bow, signifying "Thank you."
+
+The seats thus procured were some distance apart; and so the three
+companions were precluded from conversing with each other. This suited
+the taciturn mood of each that morning. As for the ladies who filled the
+other half of the three seats, they might as well have been lay figures
+from a Broadway drygoods store; conversation with them being prohibited
+by the etiquette of railway travelling. A man may journey two hundred
+and fifty miles in a car, with his elbow unavoidably jogging a lady's
+all the way, and still be as far from her acquaintance (unless she is
+graciously inclined to say something first) as if the pair were leagues
+apart. This is proper, but peculiar.
+
+The strange sadness that possessed Marcus that morning was intensified
+as the ears rolled on. There is something in the monotonous vibration of
+the train, and the recurring click of the wheels against the end of the
+rails, that provokes melancholy. Marcus looked out of the window at the
+flying landscape, and the distant patches of wood which seemed to be
+slowly revolving about each other, and was profoundly wretched. He was
+totally unconscious of the sharp, pale, nervous face by his side.
+
+The owner of the face was about thirty-five years old, though the lines
+on her brow and cheeks added an apparent five years to her age. If she
+had been put upon her trial for murder, the police reporters would have
+discovered traces of great beauty in her countenance. An ordinary
+spectator, having no occasion to spice a paragraph, would have made the
+equivocal remark that she had once been handsomer.
+
+This lady was dressed plainly, comfortably, and in good taste. Her
+hands, ungloved, were shapely, but red and hard with manual labor. On
+the second finger of the left hand was a little gold ring, much thinned
+by wearing. The eyes of this lady were regarding the unconscious Marcus
+obliquely, with a singular expression of mingled recollection and doubt.
+Sometimes her glance would drop to the ring, as if that were a link in
+the chain of her perplexed reflections. A sudden jolt of the car, as the
+train ran over a pole which had fallen on the track, roused Marcus to
+the existence of this face and those eyes.
+
+As he saw the eyes sternly bent on him, he thought that his staring out
+of the window, past the lady's profile, might have offended her. So,
+with a cough which was meant to serve as an apology for the
+unintentional rudeness, he turned his face away, and continued his
+gloomy revery among the odd patterns of the oilcloth on the floor of
+the aisle.
+
+Still the thin, nervous lady watched him obliquely.
+
+A ride of three quarters of an hour brought them to their destination,
+as they learned from a preliminary howl of the conductor through the
+rear door of the car. The engine bell rang, the whistle screamed, the
+clack of the wheels gradually became slower.
+
+"Only one minute. Hurry!" howled the conductor again.
+
+Marcus, Tiffles, and Patching were out of their seats and at the door
+with American despatch. Before the car had quite stopped, they had
+jumped off. Marcus did not notice that, behind him, was a woman
+struggling between the two rows of seats with a bandbox, a workbasket,
+an umbrella, and her hoops, all of which caught in turn on one side or
+the other. Nor did the conductor observe that this burdened and
+distressed lady was trying to make her way out; for, after looking from
+the rear of the train, and seeing that three persons had landed, and
+that there was nobody to get on, he concluded that it would be a waste
+of time to stop a minute, and so rang the bell to go ahead. The engine
+driver, equally impatient, jerked the starting lever, and the engine
+bounded forward like a horse, giving a shock to the train, and nearly
+upsetting the woman, who was still wrestling with her personal effects
+between the rows of seats. With a sudden effort, she freed herself,
+opened the door, and stood upon the platform.
+
+The engine had wheezed three times, and she hesitated to jump. She
+screamed shrilly. The sound entered the ears of Marcus Wilkeson, who was
+whisking dust and ashes off his clothes with a handkerchief. He ran
+forward, and saw the predicament of his pale and nervous fellow
+traveller. She screamed again, as the engine wheezed for the
+eighth time.
+
+Marcus extended his hand. "Jump!" said he; "I'll catch you."
+
+She did jump, much to the surprise of Marcus and the two lookers
+on--thereby indicating decision of character.
+
+Marcus caught her in his arms--bandbox, basket, and all--and the train
+hurried on.
+
+"Thank you, sir," said the lady, with some confusion. Then she walked
+rapidly down the road toward the village, like one who lived there.
+
+"A customer for the panorama, perhaps," said Tiffles. "I'm glad you
+landed her safely." Tiffles had got through his thinking, and was
+exhilarate again. He laughed so pleasantly, that even Marcus relaxed his
+grim visage, and smiled.
+
+"Not a bad ankle, that," observed Patching, looking at the rapidly
+retreating form of the rescued woman. Patching, artist-like, was always
+discovering beauties where nobody else looked for them.
+
+Marcus had no eye for the charms of nature that morning, and he
+responded not to the remark which the artist had addressed to him.
+Whereupon Patching determined not to speak to Marcus again that day.
+
+They followed the mysterious female down the road which led to the
+village. On the fences, every few rods, were plastered posters
+announcing the "Panorama of Africa" for that evening, at "Washington
+Hall"--"Tickets, twenty-five cents"--"Children under twelve years of
+age, half price," &c., &c. As B. Persimmon, P.M., had said, in one of
+his letters, some of the posters were stuck upside down. This
+circumstance did not seem to prevent the population from reading them;
+for the party observed at least two boys (half prices) in the act of
+spelling them out between their legs.
+
+Tiffles was so absorbed in the contemplation of the posters, Patching in
+a critical survey of the scenery on both sides of the road, and Marcus
+Wilkeson in an introspection of his troubled heart, that none of them
+observed how often the thin, nervous female, walking rapidly ahead,
+looked over her shoulder at one of their number.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+PIGWORTH, J.P.
+
+The village was composed of the usual ingredients, in the usual
+proportions. Law, drygoods, liquor, blacksmithing, carpentry, education,
+painting and glazing, medicine, dentistry, tinware, and other comforts
+of civilization, were all to be had on reasonable terms. There were four
+churches with rival steeples, and two taverns with rival signs. The
+village contained everything that any reasonable man could ask for,
+except a barber's shop. It takes a good-sized town to support a
+barber's shop.
+
+As they marched into the village, they were conscious of attracting
+general attention. Men looked out of the doors, women out of the
+windows, and boys had begun to fall in procession behind.
+
+"Them are the performers," said one boy to another "Wonder what that
+feller with the big hat does?" observed a second. "Turns the crank,
+guess," was the response.
+
+Patching pulled his hat farther over his eyes, and smiled gloomily at
+Tiffles, "They little think who I am," he murmured.
+
+"What a solemncholy mug that tall chap's got," said another youthful
+citizen. This made Marcus try to laugh genially at the boys. But
+in vain.
+
+"Say, Bill, isn't that little feller's shirt out o' jail?"
+
+Tiffles made a personal application of this remark. It was his constant
+misfortune to suffer rents in portions of his garments where their
+existence was least likely to be discovered by himself. As he could not
+publicly verify the suggestion of the impertinent small boy, he buttoned
+his coat tightly about him.
+
+How their identity with the panorama of Africa had been established, was
+a mystery. Small boys divine secrets by instinct, as birds find food
+and water.
+
+The two taverns were the National House and the United States Hotel.
+Although the signs were large and clean, the taverns were small and
+dirty. There was no choice between them, except in the fact that the
+United States Hotel was directly opposite Washington Hall. Therefore the
+adherents of the panorama cast their fortunes with that place of
+entertainment for man and beast--particularly beast.
+
+Mr. Thomas Pigworth, the landlord, was seated on the stoop of his
+hostelry, discoursing of national politics to a small group of his
+fellow citizens, who were performing acrobatic feats with chairs in a
+circle about him. Pigworth was a justice of the peace, and was always
+dressed in his best clothes, so as to perform his judicial functions at
+a moments notice, with dignity and ease. He was tall, thin, baldheaded.
+T.J. Childon, landlord of the "National," said hard things, as in duty
+bound, of his rival. Among others, that he had kept himself lean by
+running so hard for office for the last ten years. To which slander
+Pigworth retorted, that Childon was fat (which was true--a fine, plump
+figure was Childon's) only because he ate everything in his house, and
+left nothing for his customers.
+
+The three newcomers mounted the rotten wooden steps to the stoop. Mr.
+Pigworth left his group of auditors, came forward, and received them
+with the affability of a retired statesman.
+
+"The landlord?" asked Tiffles.
+
+"I keep the hotel," said Pigworth, with a smile which intimated that he
+kept it for amusement rather than profit.
+
+"Room and board for three of us?" asked Tiffles.
+
+"Certainly," said Pigworth, with the air of a man who was doing them a
+favor. "Ef you want only one apartment, I can give you the one occupied
+last week by the Hon. Mr. Podhammer. You have heard of him?"
+
+"Of course," responded Tiffles, to cut short the conversation.
+
+"He spoke in Washington Hall, there, on the Cons'tution. He is smart on
+some things, but THE CONS'TUTION he doesn't understand--not a word of
+it. I told him so."
+
+Tiffles was about to ask why, if the Hon. Mr. Podhammer didn't
+understand a word of the Constitution, he had the audacity to lecture on
+it; when he remembered that it was no uncommon thing for lecturers to
+talk of what they don't understand--himself of Africa, for instance.
+
+"Be good enough to show us the room," said he.
+
+"I say, Judge" (Pigworth, being a justice of the peace, was universally
+styled thus), cried a voice from the group, "do you, or do you not,
+indorse my sentiments?"
+
+Pigworth turned majestically, and spoke like an oracle:
+
+"I do not indorse your sentiments. I wish it distinctly understood, that
+I do not indorse them. I indorse nothing but the Cons'tution. That
+instrument I indorse to any extent. Are you satisfied now?"
+
+This speech was hailed by cries of "Good! good!" "That's so!" "Sound
+doctrine, that!" "The Judge knows what's what!" Only one person, the
+questioner, a young man with a preternatural head, was unappeased.
+
+"A single word more," said this young man. "Do you, or do you not,
+subscribe to my views on the Homestead Law?"
+
+Pigworth looked at the three comers as if to say, "Mark how I crush him
+now." Then, pointing his long right arm at the rash youth, he replied,
+slowly, but with fearful distinctness: "I do not subscribe to your
+views. Sooner would I lose this right arm than subscribe to them. There
+is only one view that I subscribe to. That view to which I subscribe
+(the Judge spoke with increased dignity here, and rose on his
+toes)--that view is found in the Cons'tution. You would do well to study
+the Cons'tution, my young friend."
+
+This withering rebuke was greeted with shouts and clapping of hands from
+all but the young man, who muttered something about humbug, and
+looked glum.
+
+The landlord had another excoriating remark, which he might have flung
+at the young man and finished him up, but he magnanimously forbore.
+
+"Now, my friends," said the landlord, patronizingly. He ushered them
+into a dirty entry, and piloted the way up stairs.
+
+"From New York, I suppose?" said the landlord. "Any political news?"
+
+"Really, sir, we don't meddle with politics," replied Tiffles, sharply.
+
+The landlord looked at him with an expression of pity "Oh! to be sure
+not. You belong to the pannyrama. I recolleck that the last circus folks
+that come here never talked about politics. Are you Professor Wesley?"
+
+"I am," said Tiffles.
+
+"I merely wanted to say," continued the landlord, "that six of my
+lodgers are goin' to the pannyrama on my recommendation. I have a wife,
+sister-in-law and five children."
+
+Tiffles took the hint. "I will hand you a complimentary ticket for
+yourself and family," said he.
+
+"Oh, no! by no means!" replied the landlord. "I wouldn't think of taking
+it."
+
+Mr. Pigworth then ushered his guests into the large, uncomfortable
+apartment known as the "best room" in all country hotels. The ceiling
+was low; there were three windows with small panes, the sashes of which
+rattled in the wind; a rag carpet covered the floor; an old bureau,
+topped off with a dirty white cloth, a rickety table similarly draped,
+four cane-bottomed chairs, and a huge wooden spitbox filled with
+sawdust, stood at intervals around. Two single beds occupied
+opposite corners.
+
+With reference to the beds, Mr. Pigworth remarked:
+
+"Podhammer and Gineral Chetley slept in that air one. Colonel
+Hockensacker and Judge Waterfield in t'other. There was four other
+mattresses put down here that night, each of 'em with two of our most
+distinguished citizens on it. That convention was worth to me a good
+hundred dollars."
+
+With every respect for the precedent established by Podhammer and
+associates, Marcus Wilkeson preferred to sleep alone, as he had done for
+twenty years. He privately expressed to the landlord a desire for one of
+the mattresses which had done duty during the convention.
+
+The landlord smiled, evidently regarding the request as eccentric and
+unreasonable, but nodded "All right." As for Tiffles and Patching,
+having shared the same couch several nights during the incubation of the
+panorama, the problem of how to distribute three men among two beds
+gave them no concern. Pigworth then retired.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson's first act was to open the windows, and mix some fresh
+air with the damp and mouldy atmosphere of the apartment. Patching's
+first act was to light his pipe, and throw himself on the nearest bed
+for a smoke. Tiffles's first act was to inspect the rent which the
+impertinent small boy had discovered, and make temporary repairs with a
+pin. Having done these things, and arranged their toilets hastily in a
+mirror with a crack running through it like a streak of lightning, the
+three adventurers sallied forth, and crossed the street to
+Washington Hall.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+STOOP.
+
+Washington Hall was the only place of public congregation, excepting the
+churches, in the village. It was used on Sunday by a small but clamorous
+religious sect; on Monday by a lodge of Free Masons; on Tuesday by a
+lodge of Odd Fellows; on Wednesday by the Sons of Temperance; and for
+the balance of the week was open to any description of exhibition that
+came along. It was originally built for a loft, and its reconstruction
+into a public hall was an afterthought. It was situated over a drug
+store, and was owned by the druggist, Mr. Boolpin, who was universally
+regarded as the meanest man in the village.
+
+As the three drew near the door, Mr. Boolpin, strongly smelling of
+aloes, and carrying a pestle in his hand, came out to greet them. He, in
+common with all the inhabitants, knew that the "pannyrarmer folks" were
+in town. The small boys had borne the glad intelligence all abroad. A
+number of citizens, who had been lying in wait, issued forth with Mr.
+Boolpin, and looked hard at the three.
+
+"The proprietor of the hall," said Mr. Boolpin, introducing himself.
+
+"My name is Wesley," responded Tiffles. He then introduced Patching as
+Signor Ceccarini, and Wilkeson as Mr. Wilkes. Patching chuckled inwardly
+at the thought of the incognito, and imagined the sensation that would
+be produced by the accidental revelation of his real name. Marcus felt a
+momentary humiliation at having consented to this innocent imposture.
+
+Mr. Boolpin, having shaken hands solemnly with the three, asked them to
+walk up stairs and look at the hall. They accordingly followed him up a
+series of creaking steps.
+
+"Everything in apple-pie order," said Mr. Boolpin. "The three boxes
+containing the panorama right side up with care, you see. I had them
+carted from the depot. Cost me a dollar. People thought they were
+coffins. Ha! ha! Six new tin candlesticks, you observe; also the ceiling
+whitewashed; also ten extra seats introduced, making the entire capacity
+of the hall three hundred and fifty--giving twelve inches of sitting
+room to each person. No extra charge for these fixings, though I made
+them expressly on your account. There are some things about this hall to
+which I would call your attention. Boo! Boo! Hallo! Hallo! No echo, you
+perceive. Likewise notice the fine view from the window." Mr. Boolpin
+pointed to a swamp which could be distinctly seen over a housetop toward
+the east. "The ventilation is a great feature, too." Mr. Boolpin
+directed his pestle toward a trap door in a corner of the ceiling,
+through which a quantity of rain had come a night or two previous,
+leaving a large wet patch on the floor. "It's almost too cheap for
+fifteen dollars a night."
+
+"For what?" asked Tiffles.
+
+"For fifteen dollars," replied Mr. Boolpin, twirling his pestle
+playfully. "Of course, not reckoning in the one dollar that you owe me
+for cartage. It's too cheap. I ought to have made it twenty dollars."
+
+"Why, Mr. Persimmon, the postmaster here, engaged the hall for five
+dollars. Here is his letter mentioning the price." Tiffles produced the
+letter, and pointed out the numeral in question.
+
+"It's a 5, without any doubt," rejoined Mr. Boolpin; "but Persimmon had
+no authority to name that price. I distinctly told him fifteen dollars.
+But here he is. Perhaps he can explain it."
+
+The three turned on their heels, and beheld, standing at the door, a
+short, dirty man in a faded suit of black, and a cold-shining satin
+vest. He wore an old hat set well back on a bald head, and his cravat
+was tied on one side in hangman's fashion. One leg of his trowsers was
+tucked into the top of his boot; the other hung down in its proper
+position. The man's face and hands wanted washing. This was Mr.
+Persimmon, postmaster. The secrets of his popularity were: First, his
+addiction to dirt; second, his eccentricities of dress, heretofore
+enumerated; third, a reputation for political craft and long-headedness,
+not wholly unfounded, as his ingenuity in procuring the passage of
+resolutions supporting the policy of the Administration, in all the
+conventions of his party since he became postmaster, fully proved. This
+political sage walked about town with Post-Office documents and
+confidential communications from Washington sticking out of all his
+pockets, and under the edge of his hat. He had a slight stoop in the
+shoulders, which the local wits said had increased since he undertook to
+carry the Administration.
+
+"Professor Wesley?" remarked Persimmon, extending a grimy hand. "Happy
+to see you."
+
+"Your most obedient," said Tiffles, a little stiffly, for the fifteen
+dollars annoyed him. It was a small sum to borrow, but a large one
+to pay.
+
+"Have you such a thing as a morning newspaper about you?" asked the
+postmaster. "Our bundle missed the train. As you may naturally imagine,
+sir, I am anxious to see how the grand mass meeting went off last night
+in your city. Perhaps you wos there?"
+
+Tiffles had never attended such a thing in his life; although he was
+aware that two or three grand mass meetings were held every week about
+all the year round, and a dozen nightly in times of political
+excitement. "No," said he; "but will you be good enough to tell me how
+much you hired this room for?"
+
+Persimmon thought how culpably ignorant some people were of the great
+political movements of the day, but did not say so. Descending from
+politics to the subject in hand, he replied:
+
+"Oh! fifteen dollars, of course. You will find it stated in my last
+letter to you." At this moment (no one of the three observing the act),
+the long-headed postmaster tipped a slight wink to Mr. Boolpin, who
+returned that signal of mutual understanding.
+
+Tiffles handed the letter to the postmaster, pointing out the figure 5.
+
+"Can I believe my eyes?" said the postmaster. "True enough, it is a 5.
+Confound my absent-mindedness in not puttin' down a 1." It may here be
+said, that similar instances of mental aberration were discovered in Mr.
+Persimmon's accounts toward the close of his official term.
+
+Tiffles was staggered, as he reflected that it would take sixty full
+tickets to pay the single item of rent. He had less than half a dollar
+in his own pocket. Patching was, as usual, reduced to his last
+five-dollar bill. Marcus had incidentally observed, a few minutes
+before, that he had left his wallet at home, and had only a handful of
+small silver about him. Suppose the panorama should fail on the first
+night, and be detained for debt! Tiffles had not thought of that.
+
+Tiffles remonstrated, entreated, suggested compromises, but all to no
+purpose. Boolpin was iron. The best arrangement that Tiffles could make,
+was to postpone the final settlement of the terms until after the
+performance. To that, Boolpin had not the least objection.
+
+"One thing more," said Boolpin. "If there is a row, and any seats or
+windows are broken, you are to pay the damages."
+
+Tiffles laughed faintly. "Oh! of course," said he. "But you never have
+rows here, do you?" He put the question with disguised interest.
+
+"Sometimes," carelessly replied Mr. Boolpin. "There was a legerdemain
+man got his machinery knocked to pieces, and his head broken. The mob
+was quite reasonable about the furniture, and smashed only ten seats and
+sixteen panes of glass. I charged the Professor twenty dollars for
+damages, but took off two dollars on account of his illness. Poor
+fellow! he was laid up more than a month. Then there was a band of
+nigger minstrels, called the 'Metropoliganians.' They were regular
+humbugs; and so the mob took them, and tarred and feathered them in the
+back lot. Damage to furniture on that occasion was only sixteen dollars;
+and I got every cent of it, by holding on to their trunks. There have
+been a good many such little affairs in this village. I mention these
+two cases only as examples."
+
+"And yet no people in the world is more peaceable, nor more easily
+satisfied, than the people of this town," said the postmaster. "They
+only axes not to be imposed on. That's all."
+
+"A kinder-hearted people don't live on the face of this earth," added
+Boolpin, stating the case in another way; "but you mustn't give them
+less than twenty-five cents' worth for a quarter."
+
+Tiffles replied to the effect that he would give them a dollar's worth
+apiece; but, in his heart, he foresaw, with that remarkable prescience
+which is occasionally vouchsafed to mortals, that the panorama of Africa
+was doomed to be a bad failure; and he bitterly regretted that he had
+not tried some one of a dozen other immense speculations which he had
+thought of. But he determined to give one night's exhibition, whatever
+might be the consequences. "I may as well die for an old sheep as a
+lamb," thought Tiffles.
+
+During this conversation, Patching was secretly studying the effect of
+the swamp, visible from the eastern windows; and Marcus was looking at
+the cracked wall in a fit of abstraction.
+
+Tiffles had observed several times, that morning, a youth, or man, of
+singular aspect, following him. Occasionally, on turning around
+suddenly, he would see this person at his elbow. Looking behind, at the
+close of the colloquy with the landlord, he again saw the strange youth,
+or man. The being was nearly six feet high, and powerfully built, like a
+strong man of twenty-five. His face was childish even to the degree of
+silliness. The mouth opened like a flytrap; the eyes were small and
+intensely guileless. Only a few wrinkles, and a few hairs, which grew
+wide apart on his cheeks and chin, indicated his manhood. But the oddest
+feature was the falling away of his forehead, at an angle which a dirty
+greased cap, pulled over his brow, could not conceal.
+
+"Well, sir, what do you want?" said Tiffles.
+
+"If you please, sir," said the singular being, in a cracked voice, "yure
+the pannyrarmer, a'n't ye?"
+
+"Not exactly, my lad, but I own it. And who are you?"
+
+"My name's Stoop, if you please, sir."
+
+Mr. Boolpin broke out with a laugh, which made the building reverberate.
+"It's the village idiot," said he. "He goes by the name of Stoop, which
+is short for Stupid. Ha! ha! Come, now, clear out, Stupid, and don't be
+bothering the gentleman."
+
+The boy-man began to whimper, when Tiffles, recollecting an allusion to
+a semi-idiot in one of the postmaster's letters, said:
+
+"Stay, my lad; I believe I owe you something."
+
+"For pastin' up two hundred posters, fifty cents; and distributin' five
+hundred bills, twenty-five cents. Totale, seventy-five cents." The idiot
+did not hold out his hand for the pay, and Tiffles conceived an instant
+esteem for him. An idea came to Tiffles. This idiot, as he was called,
+had shown intelligence in reckoning. He might have a deal of good sense
+under that dull exterior. Tiffles had observed, in his travels, that
+_the_ idiot which Providence assigns to every town and village, is not
+always the biggest fool in it. This idiot might have sufficient
+intellect to turn the crank of the panorama, and render muscular aid in
+other respects. At any rate, he was able-bodied enough.
+
+"My lad," said Tiffles.
+
+"Stoop, if you please, sir."
+
+"Very good. Stoop, I think I can find some work for you behind the
+scenes to-night. Can you turn a crank?"
+
+"I've done it to grindstones, sir."
+
+"It's the same principle," said Tiffles, laughing. "I'll engage you."
+
+The idiot took off his greasy cap, and swung it in the air with joy. A
+smile irradiated his great, coarse face, and his small eyes twinkled.
+"Gosh golly!" he cried; "I'm goin' to be one of the performers. I'm
+so glad!"
+
+He said this, in a spirit of juvenile exultation, to the dozen boys who
+stood gaping in at the doorway. This innocent bit of boasting provoked
+their derisive laughter, and a quantity of playful epithets and
+nicknames, which the idiot endured with marvellous patience, until one
+dirty little boy put the thumb of his left hand to his nose, twirled the
+fingers, and said, "Boo! boo! boo!" This act had the same effect on poor
+Stoop as the shaking of a red handkerchief at a bull. It enraged him. He
+sprang at the youth, and, but for the sudden closing of the door by the
+offender, who had judiciously kept a hand on the knob, would have
+chastised him on the spot.
+
+The door not only arrested his progress, but suddenly checked his wrath.
+"I'm very sorry, indeed, Professor," said he; "but Gorrifus! it makes
+me so mad!"
+
+Messrs. Boolpin and Persimmon laughed heartily. "He's a perfect idiot,
+you see," remarked the former. "Coming the nose system at him always
+makes him mad."
+
+Tiffles did not understand how that was any proof of idiocy; but, to
+prevent the recurrence of any difficulty between his new assistant and
+the populace of small boys, he thought it best to take possession of the
+hall, and lock the door. He therefore signified to Mr. Boolpin that they
+would at once proceed to put up the panorama. Tiffles threw off his
+coat, thereby intimating that he would go to work at once.
+
+Messrs. Boolpin and Persimmon inquired, as a matter of form, whether
+their further assistance was needed, and were answered in the negative.
+Whereupon they retired--Mr. Boolpin uttering a farewell caution against
+driving more nails in the wall than were necessary, and not to cut the
+floor under any circumstances--and the panorama and its adherents were
+left alone.
+
+Mr. Boolpin had driven the uproarious boys before him with his pestle,
+administering smart taps to the reluctant ones. Tiffles suffered no
+further annoyance from them that day, save an occasional "Boo! boo!"
+shouted through the keyhole, and followed by an immediate scampering of
+the perpetrators down stairs. This well-known sound always roused the
+idiot to fury; and the peaceable persuasions, and even the gentle
+violence of Tiffles, were needed to keep him from relinquishing his work
+and springing to the door.
+
+He was a most intelligent and useful idiot. He could measure distances
+more accurately than either of the three, and could ply the saw, hammer,
+plane, or hatchet (Tiffles brought all these tools with him) like a
+carpenter. His strength and skill were so great, that Tiffles found
+himself gratefully relieved from the necessity of lifting, or directing.
+Marcus Wilkeson, who had also thrown off his coat with a manful
+determination to do a hard day's work, in the hope of tiring out and
+driving away the sadness that possessed him, put on the garment again,
+and sat on a front bench, vacantly staring like an idiot at the idiot,
+and all the while thinking, gloomily, of New York. Patching stalked
+about the hall, and criticized the work as it progressed, from numerous
+angles of observation; but even he confessed that he could make no
+improvement on Stoop's highly artistic disposition of things.
+
+The idiot worked on steadily and swiftly, and only two things
+interrupted him. The first was the "Boo!" yelled through the keyhole, as
+heretofore described. The second was the unrolling of portions of the
+panorama as they were taken out of the boxes, fastened together, and
+attached to the rollers.
+
+As the canvas was unwound, Stoop would drop his saw, or hammer, or other
+tool, and gaze, with his large mouth and small eyes wide open, at the
+pictorial marvels successively disclosed. "Blame it!" said he; "a'n't
+that splendid?" or, "By jingo! look at that!" or, "Thunder! don't that
+beat all?" The tigers' tails and the elephants' trunks, the alligators'
+snouts and the boa constrictor's convolutions, he recognized at once. He
+had "read all about 'em in Olney's Jogriffy."
+
+"He is an idiot of taste," thought Patching. "I wonder what they call
+him an idiot for?" thought Tiffles. "It's a pity all the people aren't
+idiots," said Marcus Wilkeson to Tiffles. "Your panorama would be
+patronized and appreciated then." It was Marcus's first approach to a
+joke that day.
+
+By four o'clock in the afternoon the Panorama of Africa was all up, the
+rollers and the curtain in good working order, and everything ready for
+the eventful night. Stoop had taken a lesson at the wheel, and turned it
+beautifully. Tiffles had arranged a system of signals with him. One
+cough was "Stop;" two coughs were "Go on;" one stamp was "Slower;" two,
+stamps were "Faster." Tiffles and Stoop rehearsed the system several
+times, the one being before the curtain, in the position of the
+lecturer, and the other behind it, at the crank. Nothing could be more
+satisfactory.
+
+"Only one thing puzzles me," said Tiffles to his friends. "Why do they
+call this smart fellow an idiot?"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+AN AUDIENCE ANALYZED.
+
+The eventful night came on. Tiffles and friends fortified themselves
+with a poor supper, including numerous cups of weak black tea, at the
+hotel, and repaired, full of anxiety and misgivings, to the hall. The
+idiotic but intelligent Stoop had remained in charge of the panorama,
+and feasted himself, intellectually, upon the splendors of that work of
+Art, as disclosed by a single candle in front.
+
+All the candles in the hall and the entry were then lighted up, and
+produced quite a gorgeous illumination of the four windows fronting on
+the main street. This having been done, Marcus (who, having a more
+extensive acquaintance with the faces of bank bills than either of his
+friends, had kindly consented to act as money taker and cashier) took
+his seat in a little box with a pigeon hole in it, and his entire stock
+of loose change, amounting to seventy-five cents in silver, spread
+before him. Tiffles stood within the door of the hall, to see that
+nobody came in (especially small boys) who had not paid. Stoop remained
+behind the scenes, and was positively instructed to stay there. Patching
+wandered up and down the hall, as if he were an early comer, and had
+paid his quarter, and had no personal knowledge of or interest in
+the panorama.
+
+Performance was to commence at 8 o'clock. Doors were open at 61/2. Some
+time previous to that hour, the stairs leading from the street door to
+the hall were lined with the lads of the village, who amused themselves
+with making jocular remarks about "the man in the cage there" (meaning
+Marcus), and "t'other man at the door, whose shirt was out of jail"
+(meaning Tiffles). Marcus smiled grimly at his assailants through the
+small pigeon hole; and Tiffles, who felt reckless in the sure view of a
+failure, laughed heartily at them, returned jokes as bad as they sent,
+but, in the height of his humor, begged them distinctly to understand
+that they could not get In without paying. At which the juvenile chorus
+sarcastically replied, "P'r'aps not;" "Mebbe you're right," "You'll have
+to stop up the keyhole, Mister;" "Mind I don't get down the
+chimbley," &c., &c.
+
+At precisely forty-seven minutes past six, the first man made his
+appearance. He was a thick-set, pompous individual, with a gold-headed
+cane and gold spectacles, and climbed up the stairs with dignity and
+difficulty. He was followed by a pale little woman, four small children,
+and a stout, red-haired nurse, bearing in her arms a baby, which was
+laboring under an attack of the intermittent squalls. Marcus
+reconnoitred the party through his pigeon hole, and nervously jingled
+the seventy-five cents in his hand. Tiffles stepped forward to the head
+of the stairs, in order that he might not be wanting in personal respect
+to his first patron.
+
+As this thick-set man ascended the stairs, the boys hushed their voices;
+but Tiffles distinctly heard several of them say, "It's the Square."
+Though apparently awestruck in his presence, the boys did not forget to
+play a few practical jokes on "the Square's" children, such as slapping
+them, and pinching their legs as they clambered wearily up. A peal of
+cries from his tortured offspring, particularly the baby, who received a
+pin in a sensitive part of its little person, so enraged "the Square,"
+that he would have beaten all the boys with his gold-headed cane, had
+they not jumped away, laughing, and got safely out of the building, only
+to be back again the next minute.
+
+"You should not allow these boys to hang around the stairs, sir," said
+the pompous man, planting his foot on the topmost step, and bringing
+down his cane on the floor with the ring of a watchman's club. "It's
+trouble enough to come to your panorama, without being annoyed by all
+the young vagabonds in the village."
+
+"I'm sorry, sir," replied Tiffles, inwardly laughing, "but it would take
+six strong men to regulate the little rascals."
+
+"Then you ought to employ six strong men, sir. It's your business to see
+that your patrons are not insulted."
+
+Tiffles could only smile deprecatingly.
+
+"Every exhibition in this hall, for a year past," continued the man,
+"has been a humbug--an outrage on the common sense of mankind. Perhaps
+yours is an exception, though, to be candid, I have my doubts of it. Do
+I understand, sir, that you have travelled in Africa?"
+
+Tiffles indulged in the unjustifiable deception of nodding his head.
+
+"And you mean to say that the sketches for this panorama were taken on
+the spot?"
+
+"Yes, sir; on the spot--in a horn."
+
+"In a horn! What's that?"
+
+"A technical phrase, sir, which it is hardly worth while to explain at
+length. Briefly, however, I may say, that no more ingenious or
+satisfactory mode of taking sketches has been invented."
+
+"Oh! never mind the details. I hate the jargon of Art. I only wished to
+assure myself that I am not to be imposed on. Well, I think I will risk
+it, and go in. You can put us on a front seat, I suppose?"
+
+"First come, first served," said Tiffles, amiably, for he had reckoned
+up, and found that this party brought him a dollar and a quarter,
+counting the children as half prices, and the baby free.
+
+"Under these circumstances we will go in, though I must confess I expect
+to be disappointed. You will excuse my plain speaking." The thick-set
+gentleman thereupon thrust a hand into a pocket, and produced--not a
+huge roll of bank bills, or a half pint of silver, as Marcus, who eyed
+him sharply through the pigeon hole, had expected, but--a card, which he
+poked at Tiffles.
+
+Tiffles recognized it at the first glance. It was one of thirty
+complimentary tickets that he had caused to be distributed among the
+leading men of the village that morning, by advice of the landlord; and
+it bore the name of "C. Skimmerhorn, Esq."
+
+"Welcome, sir, welcome!" said Tiffles, as he observed the dollar and a
+quarter disappear from his mental horizon, and felt that, but for his
+indomitable good nature, he would like to kick C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.,
+down stairs. And Tiffles, nobly concealing his disappointment, showed C.
+Skimmerhorn, Esq., and his domestic caravan to the best front seat. As
+he turned back to the door, he heard that gentleman say to his spouse,
+"That fellow looks like a humbug."
+
+A stream of people on the stairs gladdened his eyes. In one sweeping
+survey, he figured up three dollars. But they proved to be three
+clergymen, with faded wives, large families, and female relatives
+stopping with them. Each of the clergymen graciously informed Tiffles,
+on delivering up his family ticket, that a panorama was one of the few
+secular entertainments that he could consent to patronize. They doubted
+very much whether they could have been persuaded to come, but for the
+recommendation of their evangelical brethren in the city.
+
+Tiffles bowed acknowledgment of the empty honor, and ushered the three
+clergymen and families to the front row of seats, of which C.
+Skimmerhorn, Esq., and his train, occupied as much as they could cover
+by spreading out. Mr. Skimmerhorn recognized, in one of the clergymen,
+his beloved pastor, and proceeded, in a pleasant, off-hand manner, and a
+loud voice, to give a few of the reasons which inclined him to pronounce
+the panorama a humbug.
+
+"Being deadheads," sarcastically observed Tiffles to Marcus Wilkeson,
+"of course they come early, and take the best seats."
+
+The next customer was a poor but jovial mechanic, having a red-faced
+little wife slung on his arm. This humble individual paid down fifty
+cents in bright new silver to the grim treasurer, entered the hall, and
+took seats about halfway up. "It's a splendid affair, Sally, this 'ere
+pannyrammer, I'll bet anything." "Sha'n't we enjoy it, John!" returned
+that healthy young woman.
+
+More work for the amiable Tiffles, but none for the melancholy
+Wilkeson. Two more clergymen with families, the County Judge, the local
+railroad agent, all the members of the Board of Freeholders, and several
+other people, who, according to the landlord of the United States Hotel,
+were highly influential in moulding public opinion, and were in the
+habit of receiving free tickets.
+
+"Very good for a school of comparative anatomy," said Tiffles to Marcus
+(in facetious allusion to the deadheads), "but decidedly bad for my
+panorama."
+
+Marcus responded with a dreary smile through the pigeon hole.
+
+Then there came a few more mechanics and other plain people, and then a
+streak of fortune--an entire young ladies' seminary, headed by the
+preceptress, and divided into squads, each commanded by an assistant
+teacher acting as drill sergeant. They were admitted at half price (as
+per advertisement), and brought five dollars and sixty-two cents into
+the treasury. Tiffles rubbed his eyes at the sight of such a troop of
+blooming faces, and his hands at the thought of the grand accession to
+his cash box. The female seminary was accommodated with the two front
+rows of the best seats left.
+
+Following the seminary, in an unprecedented sequence of luck, was a
+boys' school, that came whooping up the stairway like a tribe of young
+Indians, in charge of a venerable sachem in spectacles. In the rush and
+excitement of the moment, several of them ran toll--a circumstance of
+which the old gentleman did not take cognizance when he settled with
+Marcus Wilkeson for their admission at twelve and a half cents _per
+capita_. Marcus had not noticed it, and Tiffles was far too generous to
+make a fuss about a few shillings.
+
+Then a party of six flashily dressed young men, who threw away their
+cigars as they came up stairs, and thrust their quarters through the
+pigeon hole at Marcus Wilkeson, as if they were good for nothing--which
+proved to be true of two of them. Being informed of the fact by Marcus,
+the owners of the counterfeits winked at each other, and whispered, "No
+go," and then offered a broken bill on a Connecticut bank. This also
+proved "no go," whereat the sharp practitioners winked again and
+laughed, and this time paid out good current coin. These were some of
+the fast men of the village. They took seats behind the female seminary.
+
+Luck changed again, and brought in the landlord, Mr. Persimmon, P.M.,
+Mr. Boolpin, and three more free tickets, with their wives and families.
+Mr. Boolpin whispered in Tiffles's ear, that he hoped there wouldn't be
+a row; but it was a hard-looking crowd that had just gone in ahead of
+him. And there were plenty more of them coming.
+
+The latter observation proved true. The next minute, the stairs swarmed
+with a jovial party, under the leadership of a gorgeous person, who wore
+in the middle of his snowy shirt front a cluster diamond pin larger than
+a ten-cent piece. This was one of the gentlemanly conductors on the
+railroad; and the mixed company which he had the honor to command, was
+composed of ticket sellers, freight masters, brakemen, civil engineers,
+and clerks of liberal dispositions and small salaries in various walks
+of life. The party was slightly drunk, but not offensive. The
+gentlemanly conductor paid for himself and associates out of a huge side
+pocket full of loose silver. They rolled up the hall, and took the
+nearest spare seats to the female seminary.
+
+Seven and three quarters P.M. arrived. The people in the hall began to
+stamp with a noise like thunder. Tiffles had marked the heavy boots of
+the conductor, and could recognize them in the din. Several deep hisses
+varied the monotony of the performance. There were no persons coming up
+stairs. The small boys, Tiffles observed with astonishment, had vacated
+the building some time before, and could now be heard whispering quietly
+around the door below.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+HUMOUS OF THE MANY-HEADED.
+
+Tiffles knew that his time had come, and he accepted the crisis.
+
+Requesting Marcus to pocket the funds, shut up the shop, and leave the
+door to take care of itself, Tiffles marched boldly to his doom.
+Previous to extinguishing the candles in the exhibition hall, he went
+behind the curtain, and there found the idiot sitting patiently at the
+crank, and rehearsing, in a low tone, the code of signals which had been
+adopted. Patching was also there. He shrugged his shoulders in the
+French style as Tiffles came in, but said not a word. Tiffles proceeded
+straight to a bottle which stood on a window sill, and took a long drink
+from it, and then passed it to Patching, who mutely did the same, and,
+in turn, handed it to the idiot, who pulled at it with great gusto, in
+the manner of a rational person.
+
+Feeling that it would be superfluous to repeat his instructions to so
+sagacious an idiot, Tiffles immediately presented himself before the
+audience again, with a long stick, or wand, for pointing out the
+beauties of the panorama.
+
+"Ladies and gentlemen, I am about to exhibit to you the Panorama of
+Africa. You have all heard of Africa."
+
+VOICE. "Consider'ble."
+
+"True, my friend; therefore you will be well prepared to enjoy the
+pictorial attractions which I am about to unfold."
+
+VOICE. "H'ist the rag."
+
+"My friend--who has no doubt paid his quarter--I respect your request.
+The rag _is_ about to be h'isted. But, before that ceremony is proceeded
+with, I would ask the gentlemen sitting nearest the candles to be good
+enough to blow them out."
+
+Never was request more cheerfully complied with. There was a scramble of
+six or seven tall young men to each candle; and, at several of the
+candles, a brisk but friendly struggle took place between rival
+aspirants for the privilege. The room was then in total darkness, save a
+small gleam which came through the partly opened door from a solitary
+tallow in the entry, and the dull reflection of the panorama lights
+through the curtain.
+
+Some of the effects of this sudden extinguishment were extraordinary.
+The female seminary all screamed slightly. The boys' school all laughed,
+and several were heard to say, "Prime fun, a'n't it?" The railroad
+conductor and his friends coughed fictitiously, and said, "Oh! oh!"
+"A'n't you ashamed!" "Look out for pockets!" "Thief in the house!" and
+other playful things, which put the entire audience in good humor. But
+the strangest and most unexpected occurrence, was a grand rush, as of a
+herd of wild bulls, on the stairs, accompanied by the dousing of the one
+remaining light in the entry. Another moment, and over a hundred of the
+choicest juvenile spirits tore into the hall, and knocked over each
+other and everybody else in a frantic contest for free seats. The young
+ladies' seminary screamed in concert, and all the elderly ladies cried,
+"Oh my!" "Good gracious!" "What's that?"
+
+"Only the boys," said Tiffles, with unruffled composure. "Let them come.
+It is a moral entertainment, and will do them good."
+
+After a pause of about three minutes, giving the boys time to seat
+themselves, and the screams, mutterings, and laughter of the rest of the
+audience to die away, Tiffles said:
+
+"Now, ladies and gentlemen, I will introduce you to sunrise, in the
+Bight of Benin."
+
+This was the preconcerted signal for the raising of the curtain, which
+office was performed by Patching, without a hitch. The gorgeous proem,
+or introduction to the panorama, was then for the first time disclosed
+to the public. Patching blushed as he thought of the vile pandering to
+popular taste of which he had been guilty.
+
+There was a dead calm for a minute. Tiffles was silent, in order that he
+might not interrupt the quiet admiration of the spectators. The
+spectators were silent, because they could not exactly understand the
+scene, and did not know whether to laugh, hiss, or applaud. The silence
+was broken, by a boy in the back part of the hall:
+
+"I say, Mister, is that a cartwheel on top of a stonewall?"
+
+"No, sonny not exactly," said Tiffles. "What your uneducated eyes
+mistake for a cartwheel is the rising sun. The objects that your
+immature judgment confounds with spokes, are rays. Your stone wall, it
+is hardly necessary to inform riper intellects, is a distant range of
+mountains. It is one of Ceccarini's happiest efforts."
+
+"Hurrah for Checkerberry!" cried another lad, mistaking the name of the
+high (imaginary) Italian artist.
+
+"Are we to understand, sir, that this is a rolling prairie in the
+foreground?" asked a deep voice, which Tiffles at once recognized as
+emanating from C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.
+
+"Oh! no, sir; it is the Bight of Benin; and I must say, though, perhaps,
+I am too partial, that Ceccarini never did a better thing."
+
+"The _what_ of Benin?" asked the voice.
+
+"The Bight--or, in other words, as you may not be familiar with
+geography, the Bay of Benin."
+
+"Then why not say Bay, sir?" replied C. Skimmerhorn Esq., stung with the
+allusion to his want of geographical knowledge. "Why this mystery
+about terms!"
+
+There were cries of "Go it, Square." "Dry up, old boy!" "Propel with the
+show!" &c., &c. Tiffles adopted the latter suggestion, and without
+answering the lawyer's insinuation, proceeded to point out the natural
+appearance of the waves, the truthfulness of the distant mountains, the
+absolute fidelity of the sunrise. "And here let me answer an
+objection in advance. It may be said that this sunrise does not
+look like a sunrise in Jersey. Admit it. Neither do the snakes
+(_sensation_)--neither do the snakes which I am about, to exhibit
+(_increased sensation_ and Oh! me's! from the Young Ladies' Seminary)
+resemble the familiar green or striped serpent of your own peaceful
+fields. Neither do the tigers, which I shall presently have the honor of
+showing to you _(renewed sensation)_, bear any marked affinity to the
+serene woodchuck that burrows in your happy hills. The sunrises and
+sunsets, the boa constrictors, the tigers, and the other phenomena of
+Africa, are all immense, gorgeous, and peculiar. They must be judged by
+themselves, and not by comparison. My hearers will be kind enough to
+bear this in mind, as we go on."
+
+He then went on to repeat a great many statistics concerning the
+population and resources of Africa. He had read up for these facts and
+figures, under the impression that they would interest the solid portion
+of his audience. But he soon found out that he interested nobody
+(perhaps because the solid portion of audiences is a myth), and finally
+yielded to general requests of "Push ahead!" "Fire away!" "Start your
+train!" (the latter from the gentlemanly conductor and friends.)
+
+Tiffles therefore whistled once, and the panorama commenced moving
+slowly and steadily. The idiot, the rollers, and the lights, all
+worked well.
+
+From the Bight of Benin, the voyaging spectators took an excursion up
+the river.
+
+The uninterrupted stretch of deep blue for water, and light blue for
+sky, and green for the farther bank, with occasional palm trees looking
+like long-handled pickaxes, seemed to satisfy them. At any rate they
+looked on, and found no fault in words; which both Tiffles and Patching
+took for an auspicious sign. Tiffles kept step with his explanations.
+
+His method was this. When the palm tree came in sight, he would give a
+minute account of that noble tropical growth, and the many uses to which
+it and its products could be put. When a flock of wild ducks appeared
+sailing majestically on the river, he would entertain his auditors with
+a circumstantial description of how the natives caught wild ducks. A
+boat or hollow log, with a human figure, suggested a reference to the
+progress which the African had made in marine architecture and the
+science of navigation. In this way, Tiffles thought he was beguiling his
+customers. Some low sounds, like suppressed hisses, soon convinced him
+of his error.
+
+"I beg your pardon, Professor," said a thick-set voice, which he always
+recognized as coming from C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.; "but it seems to me that
+this portion of your panorama is a little monotonous. I presume that in
+this suggestion, I express the sentiments of my fellow citizens here
+assembled." Cries of "Go on, Square!" "That's so!" mingled with a
+vigorous stamping of feet and catcalls from the boys in the background,
+proved, alas! the truth of the conjecture.
+
+Tiffles coughed twice for the idiot to stop, and was sagaciously obeyed.
+"In behalf of Africa," he remarked, "representing her, as I may say, on
+this occasion, I would beg leave to apologize to the learned gentleman
+for the poverty of her scenery, at this stage of the panorama. If Africa
+had been aware of the learned gentleman's preferences, she would,
+doubtless, have got up some stunning effects for him in places where now
+you see only a river, a sky, and a strip of green bank, all unadorned,
+precisely as they are."
+
+The exquisite irony of this retort pleased the audience, and elicited
+general though faint applause, and several cries of "Shut up, Skim!"
+"Got your match, old boy!" "Oh! let the man go on!" The last remark
+issued from the gentlemanly conductor, and fell with peculiar pleasure
+on Tiffles's ears.
+
+"One word more, and I am done," resumed the lawyer, who was
+professionally calm amid scenes of disturbance. "I only wish to elicit
+the truth. Have you, and your artist (Mr. Chicory, I think you call
+him), or either of you, actually gone over the scenery here represented.
+We wish to understand that point!"
+
+"We have, both of us, gone over this scenery repeatedly." This was true,
+as both Tiffles and Patching, anticipating some such question, had
+stepped over the canvas back and forth, in rolling and unrolling it,
+several times. "Is the eminent counsellor satisfied?"
+
+"Oh! yes," said C. Skimmerhorn, Esq., in a voice which signified that
+he knew the panorama was a humbug, but, unfortunately, couldn't
+prove it.
+
+One cough, and the panorama started again--but a little too fast.
+Tiffles stamped once, and the idiot reduced the speed, until it was too
+slow. Two stamps brought it right. The river soon disappeared in a
+swamp, where the alligators' heads protruding above the water gave
+Tiffles an opportunity to describe several terrific combats which he had
+enjoyed with those pugnacious creatures. This entertained the audience
+for several minutes.
+
+"Have you no full views of alligators, sir?" asked a voice which Tiffles
+presumed, from its solemn inflection, to come from a clergyman.
+
+"None at all, sir. The African alligator persists in keeping out of
+sight. You never see anything but his head--except his tail, as
+represented here." Tiffles pointed with his wand to something that
+looked like the end of a fence rail sticking out of the water. "True
+Art, sir, sacrifices effect for Truth."
+
+"Certainly, sir. Truth is what we are all after," replied the clergyman.
+But there was an indefinable something in his voice that indicated a
+wish for more alligator--much more.
+
+The swamp ended in a dry jungle, interspersed with palm trees,
+elephants, lions, tigers, and serpents. Tiffles counted upon interesting
+his audience here. Snakes were first on the list. Two heads, with
+expanded jaws and forked tongues, were looking at each other above the
+jungle, and two tails were interlocked, also above the jungle, a few
+feet off. This conveyed the idea of two boa constrictors fighting. Other
+heads and other tails--there was always a tail for every head--stuck up
+at regular intervals about. He stopped the panorama with a cough,
+and said:
+
+"The entire population of this particular jungle are--boa constrictors
+of unprecedented size and ferocity."
+
+Tiffles heard a rustle of fans and dresses not far off. It was the
+whole female seminary shuddering. There was also a general movement
+throughout the audience as of people adjusting themselves to obtain a
+good sight.
+
+"These boa constrictors, so admirably delineated here,"--commenced
+Tiffles.
+
+"Where?" said the voice of a country gentleman. "I don't see any bore
+constructors."
+
+"Nor I." "Nor I." "Trot 'em out!" "Show 'em up!" "Produce your snakes!"
+Such were the remarks that resounded through the hall.
+
+"Oh, no!" "Don't!" "Please don't!" emanated from several girlish voices.
+
+"My fair auditors have no cause for alarm. I have no living snakes to
+show. I might have captured several hundred, and brought them to this
+country and exhibited them, but, in deference to the well-known aversion
+cherished toward snakes by cultivated communities, I forbore to do so.
+The only boa constrictors that I have, are now before you. These are
+their heads. These their tails" (indicating the termini of the snakes).
+
+Now, the spectators--or a large number of them--had suffered fearful
+expectations of seeing real snakes. When, therefore, it was announced
+that these harmless daubs, resembling, at a distance, some variety of
+tropical vegetation, were the only snakes they were to see, there was a
+feeling, first, of relief, and then of disappointment.
+
+The disappointment manifested itself in low hisses, and exclamations,
+such as "Humbug!" "Gammon!" "Swindle!" Tiffles made several beginnings
+of excellent snake stories, of which he was the hero, but was checked by
+the tumult. Finding the snakes were not popular, he determined to try
+the tigers, lions, and other beasts of prey farther on. He coughed once
+emphatically, and the canvas moved like clockwork.
+
+Before it had journeyed five feet, somebody on the front row of seats
+coughed twice in precisely the same manner as Tiffles. The idiot,
+supposing the signal came from his employer, stopped. Tiffles,
+perceiving the mistake, coughed again, and the motion was resumed; when
+a double cough resounded from the front seat, and the motion ceased.
+
+Then Tiffles realized that his system of signals was understood by
+somebody. What should he do? He could not stop the free, universal right
+to cough. Therefore he stepped to the corner of the curtain, raised it,
+and said, in a voice loud enough to be heard by the audience, "Stoop,
+whenever I want you to 'stop,' or 'go on,' or 'faster,' or 'slower,' I
+will say so. You understand?"
+
+"Puffickly," replied the gifted idiot.
+
+"I say, boys, Stoop's in there," shouted the somebody that had coughed.
+
+"Stoop!" "Stoop!" "Bully for Stoop!" "Come out o' that, Stoop!" was
+shouted all over the house; but Stoop remained faithful to his post, and
+calmly ground away at the crank.
+
+Suddenly it occurred to some boy to yell, "Boo! boo!" whereat the other
+boys laughed, and took up the chorus, "Boo! boo!"
+
+The canvas moved less steadily, slackening for a moment, and then
+shooting ahead, as if the propelling power were the subject of strange
+perturbation. The roguish boys, and the men too, and, chief of them,
+that practical humorist of a conductor, observing this, screamed, "Boo!
+boo! boo I boo!" all the louder. Tiffles knew that the critical time had
+come, and philosophically laughed at the ruin of his last grand project,
+as he had laughed at the ruin of forty other grand projects in
+their day.
+
+The panorama stopped without a signal this time. A hoarse voice
+screamed, "Gorryfus! Gosh thunder! By jimminy!" The curtain was jerked
+aside, and Stoop rushed into the hall like a fury. Coming out of a place
+partly lighted into one totally dark, his first move was to run blindly
+into Tiffles, nearly knocking that gentleman off his legs.
+
+"Hold on, Stoop! Hold on!" shouted Tiffles, with what was left of his
+breath. But the idiot only screamed, "Gosh thunder! Gorryfus!" and
+darted for the main aisle, intending to run a muck among his
+persecutors. There was a general scrambling of the boys to avoid this
+incarnated wrath. The whole female seminary, and all the ladies present,
+screamed together.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+SCENES NOT IN THE BILLS.
+
+The enraged idiot struck out right and left, without hurting
+anybody--the objects of his vengeance contriving to elude him in the
+dark. Most of the sturdy blows which he dealt, using his arms like
+flails, fell upon the railings of the seats, and only bruised his hands.
+Just as he had caught a boy by the collar, and was about to take a twist
+in his hair, the door opened, and a light appeared. It came from three
+candles borne by three men.
+
+This apparition caused the furious idiot to suspend hostilities on the
+instant.
+
+All eyes were turned toward the three men. All voices were hushed. There
+was a whisper in the air that something strange was about to happen.
+
+The man who entered first was a stranger, who moved and looked about in
+the quick, nervous way born of city life. The other two men were
+well-known residents of the village. Some of the audience had had
+unpleasant cause to know them.
+
+Having locked the door, and stationed his associates in a position to
+command the windows, the stranger walked quickly up the aisle, bearing
+his lighted candle, and said, in a loud voice, which fell strangely on
+the hushed assemblage:
+
+"Marcus Wilkeson will be kind enough to give himself up. Upon my honor,
+he cannot escape." This was said with a charming politeness.
+
+A tall figure arose at the wall end of one of the back seats. "I am
+Marcus Wilkeson. What do you want with me, sir?" His voice trembled, and
+his face was livid.
+
+"To go with me to New York, Mr. Wilkeson," said the tall stranger,
+quickly. "Thank you for your promptness in answering. The only clue that
+I had, was the hasty measure I took of you this morning, when I was
+watching for an escaped convict at Cortlandt-street ferry. Perhaps you
+remember seeing me there, sir?"
+
+Marcus, though the sudden shock had almost stunned him, at once recalled
+the man who had eyed him narrowly at the ferry that morning.
+
+The two other candle bearers had stepped forward as Marcus declared
+himself, and were about to lay hold of him, when the first man smilingly
+pushed them back, and said:
+
+"Don't touch him. It's all right. Mr. Wilkeson is a gentleman, and will
+go quietly."
+
+To Marcus he said, apologetically:
+
+"Two Jersey constables I got to assist me. They don't do things exactly
+in the style of Detective Leffingwell."
+
+Marcus recognized the name; and so terrified was he at the thoughts
+which it conjured up, that his tongue clove to the roof of his mouth.
+The scene was like a horrid dream.
+
+"Everything is regular, sir," continued the detective. "We have a
+requisition for you from the Governor of this State. It was obtained by
+telegraph from Trenton. You will excuse my dropping on you in this way;
+but I wanted to take you to New York to-night, as the inquest meets
+again at ten o'clock to-morrow morning."
+
+"The inquest!--what inquest? Tell me, in God's name!" said Marcus,
+finding his voice at last.
+
+"Inquest! There must have been a murder committed." "What is it?" "Tell
+us, Mr. Policeman." The question was asked on all sides.
+
+"Now I _didn't_ want a scene," said Detective Leffingwell, politely,
+"and I won't have one. Mr. Wilkeson and I understand each other. The
+word 'inquest' dropped out of my mouth before I thought."
+
+"As heaven is above us, we do not understand each other!" said Marcus.
+"Tell me, pray tell me at once, or I shall go mad."
+
+"Anything to please you," replied the officer; "but I can't bear these
+explanations in public. It isn't my way of doing business." He then
+leaned forward, and whispered in the ear of Marcus.
+
+"Great God!" was all that Marcus could say. Then he sank to the seat,
+and bowed his head in agony.
+
+Tiffles, who had forced his way to his friend's side during the
+excitement, threw his arms about him, and said:
+
+"Never mind appearances, Marcus. I'll stake my life you are innocent of
+the charge, whatever it is."
+
+"Oh! you're a humbug," remarked C. Skimmerhorn, Esq.
+
+"Call me and my panorama a humbug, if you please; but Mr. Wilkeson is a
+gentleman and a man of honor." Tiffles's face beamed with a strange
+kindness. He looked up, and saw the idiot standing near him. His small
+eyes filled with tears as he gazed with an expression of intelligent
+pity at the crushed man. Tiffles could have hugged the idiot, not only
+as the most sensible man, but the best-hearted one he had seen in
+the village.
+
+C. Skimmerhorn, Esq., would have retorted severely, but his attention,
+and that of all the crowd, was drawn, at that moment, to a citizen who
+came forward, and, in a state of beathless excitement, said he guessed
+he knew what it all meant. He was in New York that afternoon, and read,
+in one of the evening papers, an account of a dreadful murder committed
+on an old man named Minford. The supposed murderer, the paper said, was
+a Mr. Wilkes or Wilkson.
+
+"Now I hope you are satisfied," said Detective Leffingwell, looking
+around with contempt at his hearers.
+
+A slight scream was heard from the corner of a seat near by. From the
+beginning of this unpleasant affair, it was observed that a plainly
+dressed woman--a seamstress accompanying the family of a Mr. Graft--had
+become very pale and nervous, and had been seen to move uneasily in her
+seat. This woman had fainted away. She it was who had stared so
+strangely at Marcus in the car that morning.
+
+Mrs. Graft and her two daughters promptly removed the fainting woman to
+the entry, where the fresh air soon restored her, and she was sent home.
+
+"No wonder the women faint away, when you crowd round here so stupidly,"
+said the officer, momentarily losing his temper. "Please step back, now,
+and let Mr. Wilkeson and me get out. We must leave for New York by the
+next train--and that starts in fifteen minutes." The detective referred
+to his watch. "Are you ready, sir?" tapping Marcus gently on
+the shoulder.
+
+Marcus rose, and displayed a face haggard with grief.
+
+They all whispered, or thought, "He is guilty."
+
+"I am ready," said he; "but I call heaven to witness that I know nothing
+of this crime."
+
+The detective bowed courteously, and then said:
+
+"I also have summons for Mr. Tiffles and Mr. Patching, gentlemen
+connected with this panorama, as witnesses. They will please
+step forward."
+
+"I am Mr. Tiffles," said that person. "Wesley is my panoramic name."
+
+This disclosure caused a small sensation. "I knew the man was a humbug
+from the start," whispered C. Skimmerhorn, Esq., to a friend at his
+elbow. "I'd like to prosecute him for swindling."
+
+"And I am Mr. Patching," exclaimed the artist, presenting himself.
+
+It should be here stated, that, when the disturbances of the evening
+first set in, Patching, in pure disgust at the bad taste of the
+audience, had quietly dropped himself out of the second story window at
+the rear of the stage, and had been skulking in the back lot ever since.
+Having heard, outside, of the arrest of Marcus Wilkeson, on an unknown
+charge, he had plucked up courage and friendship enough to reenter the
+hall, and tender his aid and consolation to that unhappy man. He came in
+just in time to hear his name called.
+
+"So that's the chap they called Chicory, or Checkerberry," whispered C.
+Skimmerhorn, Esq. "Anybody can see he is a swindler by his slouched hat,
+and beard. _Shouldn't_ I enjoy having a good case against him!"
+
+Pigworth, J. P., landlord of the United States Hotel, and Mr. Boolpin,
+proprietor, came forward with their little bills, and demanded immediate
+payment. This financial difficulty was arranged in one minute by the
+genius of Wesley Tiffles. After paying Stoop one dollar and a half (that
+excellent idiot crying, and vowing that he didn't want it), the rest of
+the proceeds, deducting enough for fares to New York, were divided
+equally between the two other creditors; and the panorama and all the
+appurtenances were left as a joint security for remaining obligations.
+The panorama was worth twice the debts, to be cut into window shades.
+After some grumbling, Messrs. Pigworth and Boolpin accepted the terms.
+
+Five minutes later, the polite detective and his party started for New
+York. There was a great number of people at the station to see them off,
+but only one to say "good-by." That one was the man-boy Stoop, who cried
+as if his great, simple heart would break.
+
+
+
+BOOK EIGHTH.
+
+A DRAMATIC INTERLUDE.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE OVERTURE.
+
+It was the last of a delightful series of dramatic nights at Mrs.
+Slapman's; and her house was quite filled with embodied Poetry, Travels,
+Dramatic Literature, Music, Art, and the Sciences.
+
+The dramatic arrangements of Mrs. Slapman's house were simple, but
+effective. A curtain, with rings, hung across the north end of the
+parlor, established the confines of the stage, which was on a level with
+the floor, and covered with green baize to represent rural scenes, or a
+three-ply carpet to indicate refined interiors. Against the wall were
+rollers, from which scenes could be dropped, affording perspectives of
+country, or streets, or gilded saloons, as the necessities of the drama
+required. There were six of these scenes, all painted by Patching (to
+oblige Mrs. Slapman) in his leisure moments, which were numerous; and
+they all exhibited evidences of his style. Six sets of flies, or side
+scenes, matching with the rear views, had been executed by a
+scene-painter's assistant, whom Mrs. Slapman had taken under her
+patronage, and were thought, by some persons, superior to Patching's
+efforts. Such was the belittling criticism to which that great artist
+was constantly subjected. There was a space of about four feet between
+the top of the curtain and the high ceiling. The light from the parlor
+chandelier directly in front, aided by six gas jets behind the scenes,
+made the whole performance and performers as clear as noonday.
+
+This miniature theatre was constructed of portable frames, which could
+be put up or taken down in half an hour, and was the ingenious invention
+of the scene-painter's assistant. When it was removed, the only traces
+of its former presence were two brass-headed spikes in the walls, from
+which the side curtains depended.
+
+These spikes imparted anguish to the mind of Mr. Slapman whenever he
+gazed upon them. Mrs. S. had heard him say, that "some people would look
+well hanging up there." By "some people," he was supposed to mean the
+gentlemen who participated in her dramatic entertainments. Mrs. S. bore
+the cruel remark meekly, merely replying that perhaps he had better try
+the strength of the spikes first, by suspending himself from one
+of them.
+
+The audience, usually numbering about fifty, were seated in chairs,
+which filled the parlor, with the exception of a space of ten feet in
+front of the stage. A fair view of the entire proceedings could be had
+from all but the two back rows of chairs, the occupants of which were
+compelled to imagine the attachment of feet and ankles to the several
+characters of the drama.
+
+From the left wing of the stage a door opened into the hall, affording
+communication by the staircase to the ladies' and gentlemen's dressing
+rooms on the floor above. On the third floor (it was known to some of
+the guests) was the private apartment of Mr. Slapman. A strong smell of
+cigar smoke, as of one fumigating sullenly and furiously, was the
+unvarying proof of his presence in the house. On this eventful night, he
+had been seen, at an early hour, pacing up and down the hall of his
+third floor, belching forth clouds of smoke, like Vesuvius just before a
+fiery eruption.
+
+People who were in the sad secret of Mrs. Slapman's household sorrows,
+looked at each other and smiled, but said nothing; for it was a point of
+good breeding not to allude to him in conversation. The newer guests,
+unaware of the melancholy facts in the case, supposed that the restless
+gentleman on the third floor was some one of Mrs. Slapman's eccentric
+friends, working out an idea. Mrs. Slapman paid no attention to her
+jealous spouse, imagining that he would smoke away his wrath quietly, as
+usual, and not interfere with the evening's amusement. Hitherto, on
+occasions, he had done nothing more disagreeable than to open the parlor
+door furtively, cast one wild look inside, and then suddenly withdraw
+his head, gently slamming the door after him.
+
+The play of the evening was written "expressly for the occasion" by a
+gentleman who had produced one melodrama at a Bowery theatre, and failed
+to produce a large number of melodramas at all the theatres in Broadway.
+Mrs. Slapman, a true patroness of genius, kindly permitted this
+gentleman to prepare all her charades, and gratified him, on several
+occasions by bringing out some of the minor plays from his stuffed
+portfolio.
+
+By eight o'clock all the chairs were filled, and the actors and
+actresses were still lingering over their toilet. After waiting ten
+minutes longer, and crossing and uncrossing their legs repeatedly, the
+audience stamped and whistled very much in the manner of an impatient
+crowd at a real theatre. Mrs. Slapman relished these little ebullitions
+of natural feeling, because it made the illusion of her "Thespian
+parlor" (as she called it) more complete.
+
+At eight and a quarter o'clock, the orchestra, consisting of two flutes
+and a violin, issued from behind the curtain, and seated itself before
+some music stands ranged against the wall. The performers were amateurs
+(two bookkeepers, and a cashier in private life), and could not have
+been hired to play for any amount of money, though they were always
+willing to favor a few friends. Mrs. Slapman humored them in this whim,
+and they played regularly at her private theatricals.
+
+After a few nods and facetious remarks to their friends in the audience
+(familiarities from which a paid orchestra would have been totally cut
+off), the musicians dashed into a new overture, composed by Signor
+Mancussi, also "expressly for the occasion."
+
+This musical composition had been rehearsed the week previous in the
+presence of a select party of amateurs and critics, and had been
+pronounced, by the sub-editor of a weekly paper, "remarkable for its
+breadth and color." Under these circumstances, the overture was listened
+to with much interest at first, which abated as the music progressed.
+Touching the merits of "color" and "breadth" there might be some grounds
+of doubt, but none whatever concerning its "length."
+
+It lasted until twenty minutes of nine; and, toward the close, faint
+scrapings of dissatisfaction were heard, which would have been more
+audible had Signor Mancussi not been present. As the last twang of the
+fiddle died on the air, M. Bartin was heard by several persons to say,
+"Bah! a bad hash from Rossini and Auber." The remark was reported to
+Signor Mancussi, and did not tend to enhance his friendly regards for
+the other gentleman.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+CURTAIN UP.
+
+At eight and three quarters P.M. the curtain was rung up, and discovered
+a rustic scene, in the midst of which Mrs. Slapman (Fidelia) was seated.
+She was dressed in a white frock with low neck, and a flat hat, and was
+trimmed out with red ribbons in all directions. She looked young and
+pretty. Only an anxious knitting of her eyebrows revealed the cares and
+troubles of intellect. Mrs. Slapman was applauded by a unanimous
+clapping of hands. She was seated in a red-velvet rocking chair, at a
+small but costly table, on which stood an expensive vase filled with
+flowers. These properties, though few, were intended to signify
+boundless affluence and luxury. Fidelia languidly waved a jewelled fan,
+and sighed. "Will he never come?" said she.
+
+She had hardly made this remark, when, by a singular coincidence,
+Alberto (Overtop) entered from the left wing, and threw himself, with as
+much grace as his tights would permit, at her feet. She emitted a small
+shriek, and gave him her hand to kiss, which he did with ecstasy.
+Alberto was habited like an Italian gentleman in good circumstances; and
+no one would have suspected his poverty, if he had not commenced the
+dialogue by an affecting allusion to his last _scudi_, which brought
+tears to the eyes of the fair Fidelia.
+
+Such trifling questions as lovers alone can ask and answer then passed
+between them; and at last came the solemn interrogatory from the
+kneeling Alberto: "And will you always love me, dearest?"
+
+Fidelia turned her meek orbs toward the ceiling, raised her hand, said
+"_Forever!_" and was about to add, "I swear," when Bidette (Miss Wick)
+rushed upon the scene with the intelligence, "He comes."
+
+"Who?" asked Alberto.
+
+"My father!" shrieked Fidelia. "Go--that way." She pointed with her
+small alabaster hand to the left wing.
+
+Alberto vanished as per request, while Fidelia, with well-affected
+calmness, commenced humming an opera air, and fanning herself. Bidette,
+the favorite maid, pretended to readjust a flower in her mistress's
+hair. These feminine artifices were to throw the coming father off
+his scent.
+
+But the father (Mr. Johnsone, the junior of a small book-publishing
+house) was sharp eyed, though he lacked spectacles. As he emerged from
+the right wing, he caught a distinct view of a pair of soles
+disappearing in the distance, and benignantly asked: "Who is that,
+my child?"
+
+The child answered: "Only the postman, pa."
+
+"Where is the letter?" he asked.
+
+"Please, sir," interrupted Bidette, observing her mistress's confusion,
+"there wasn't no letter. He mistook the house for another, sir."
+
+The father nodded his head to express his complete satisfaction with
+this explanation, and then told Bidette to leave the spot, as he had
+something of the utmost importance to tell his daughter. Bidette pouted,
+and withdrew, giving a bewitching shake of her striped calico dress, to
+signify her hatred of brutal fathers. This touch of nature drew plaudits
+from those among the audience who were but slightly acquainted with Miss
+Wick. The others looked on with critical indifference.
+
+The father took a chair, thrust out his legs like a reigning prince, and
+proceeded, in a story of unnecessary length, to tell his daughter that
+he owed one hundred and seventy thousand florins to Signor Rodicaso, and
+would be a ruined man in forty-eight hours if that sum were not paid.
+Life, in that event, would be simply insupportable. He had procured a
+pistol to blow out his brains, but had subsequently concluded to make
+one more effort to save himself. He would, therefore, appeal to his
+daughter, _as_ a father, and ask her to marry Signor Rodicaso, and so
+liquidate the debt, to-morrow. He did not wish to influence her
+choice--far from it--but, if she did not consent, he should feel under
+the painful necessity of shooting himself on the spot.
+
+The father produced a pistol, and held it to his left ear.
+
+Fidelia, looking like a marble statue of grief, said, in a low but
+perfectly audible voice: "Stay! I will wed him." This was enunciated
+with the calmness of despair. Not a gesture, nor a twinge of the
+features, nor an accent to indicate emotion of any kind. It was in quiet
+efforts like these that Mrs. Slapman excelled.
+
+When the applause elicited by this stroke of genius had ceased, Mr.
+Chickson (Signor Rodicaso) came rather awkwardly upon the stage. His
+eyes (and, it might be added, his legs) rolled absently about, as if he
+were endeavoring to recall his part, or were in the inward act of
+composing a poem.
+
+"Your future husband, Fidelia," said the father.
+
+Fidelia rose from her seat--still imperturbable.
+
+Chickson advanced with a sliding motion, and then paused, as if he had
+forgotten what to do. Mrs. Slapman was heard to whisper something
+(probably the cue), but he only rolled his eyes heavily in response. A
+look of displeasure marred her serene features, and, instead of fainting
+away in Signor Rodicaso's arms, as she should have done, she dropped
+into the embrace of her father, taking that personage quite
+unexpectedly, and nearly knocking him off his chair.
+
+Chickson projected himself forward at the same time to catch her, and,
+in so doing, lost his balance, and just escaped, by an effort, from
+sprawling on the floor.
+
+Then he looked helplessly at the audience; and there was no longer any
+doubt entertained that Chickson was slightly intoxicated. Getting drunk,
+now and then, was an infirmity of Chickson's genius.
+
+The stage manager had the good sense to ring down the curtain on this
+painful scene, and, the next moment, there was a dull sound, as of
+somebody falling on the floor behind the green baize.
+
+After an interval of fifteen minutes--protracted by the "unexpected
+indisposition" of the poet, and the consequent necessity of intrusting
+Signor Rodicaso to other hands--the curtain rises again, and discloses
+Alberto in a humble cot, surrounded by three-legged stools, and other
+evidences of extreme poverty. He is seated on a rickety table (in
+preference to the greater uncertainty of the stools), his arms are
+folded, and his head droops upon his breast.
+
+In this attitude, he begins to soliloquize, and informs the audience
+(what they did not know before) that, from a clump of shrubbery, he had
+seen fully as much as they of the preceding scene. He does not blame
+Fidelia. Oh! no. In her cruel dilemma, she could do no less. But he
+curses--and curses again--and continues to curse for some time--that
+Fate which deprives him of the "paltry means" (one hundred and seventy
+thousand florins) to buy off the "heartless monster" (Rodicaso). Having
+wreaked himself upon Destiny to his own satisfaction, he suddenly
+remembers that he has not eaten anything for thirty-six hours. He feels
+in all his pockets successively, but finds nothing. He then draws from
+his bosom a portrait of his father, set with antique gems. He gazes upon
+it reverently, kisses it, and says: "Shall I part with this sacred
+memento for vulgar bread? Never! Let me die!" He restores the portrait
+to his bosom, folds his arms again, inclines his head, and shuts his
+eyes, as if preparing to expire comfortably.
+
+All this time, a fat red face, belonging to a corpulent body, has been
+watching the depressed lover from the right wing. As Alberto utters the
+last sad ejaculation, a thick hand attached to a short arm raises a
+kerchief to a pair of small eyes in this fat red face, and wipes them.
+Then the stout gentleman reflects a moment, nods his head approvingly,
+draws forth a wallet, opens it slowly, takes out some paper that rustles
+like bank notes, produces a memorandum book, writes a few lines on one
+of the leaves hastily with a pencil, tears out the leaf, encloses the
+leaf and the bank notes in an envelope, emerges with his entire figure
+into the full light of the stage, walks stealthily toward Alberto with a
+pair of creaking shoes that would have waked the soundest sleeper,
+places the note on the table by his side, raises his hands to heaven,
+murmuring, "God bless the boy!" and retires in the same feline but
+tumultuous manner.
+
+This mysterious visitor was Bignolio (Matthew Maltboy), a rich money
+lender, uncle of Alberto, and commonly reported to be the "tightest old
+skinflint in Venice."
+
+After a pause, scarcely long enough to allow his uncle's heavy footsteps
+to die away in the distance, Alberto came out of his revery. His first
+act was to look at the ceiling, then at the floor, then all about
+him--everywhere but at the note on the table. At last, when nothing else
+remained to be scrutinized, his eyes naturally fell upon this valuable
+communication.
+
+"What is this?" he asked. Then he answered his own question by opening
+the letter, and reading it, as follows:
+
+     Venice, Oct. 16,----.
+
+     Dear Nephew:
+
+     I have watched you, and know all. You are indeed the son of
+     your father, and, I am proud to add, the nephew of your
+     uncle. Enclosed are sixty thousand florins. Go to Jinkerini
+     Bros., on the Rialto, and buy up judgments that they hold
+     against Rodicaso for three times that amount, and offset them
+     against old Corpetto's debts. Rodicaso conceals his property
+     so well, that none has ever been found to satisfy these
+     judgments. Drive a sharp bargain, and show yourself a chip of
+     the old block. Keep the balance for your wedding gift.
+
+     Farewell--till we meet again.
+
+     Bignolio.
+
+"Dear, dear uncle!" exclaimed Alberto, carefully buttoning up his pocket
+over the funds, and kissing the letter in transports of joy. "And only
+yesterday he would not lend me a _scudi_ to get my dinner. Generous man!
+how have I wronged him! Now, Fate, I will floor thee and Rodicaso
+together."
+
+[Exit Alberto, rapidly, by shortest land route to the Rialto.]
+
+Overtop's acting, throughout this difficult scene, was of a superior
+order. Nothing could be more natural, for instance, than the buttoning
+up of his pocket over his uncle's gift. But neither that, nor the other
+strong point, where he exulted in the finest tragedy tones over the
+anticipated downfall of Fate and Rodicaso, produced the slightest
+sensation among his hearers. Matthew Maltboy paid the penalty of his
+intimate relations with Overtop, by an equal unpopularity. His fine
+rendition of the character of Bignolio might as well have been played to
+a select company of gravestones.
+
+There was a necessary interval of twenty minutes for the fitting out of
+the stage--during which time the amateur orchestra performed selections
+from "Semiramide," but, happily, not loud enough to interfere with the
+easy flow of conversation all over the room. The second flutist, while
+looking over his shoulder angrily at the garrulous audience, executed a
+false note, which almost threw the first (and only) violinist into fits.
+In turning round to rebuke the errant performer, the violinist struck
+his elbow against a similar projection of the other flutist, and knocked
+a false note out of that gentleman too, besides momentarily ruffling his
+temper. This little episode diffused unhappiness over the entire music.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+ACT SECOND.
+
+The spectators had been told that there were imposing stage effects in
+the second and last act; and they were not disappointed. The entire
+front was filled with furniture, real mahogany and brocade, leaving
+barely room for human beings to walk about. The background was a
+perspective of pillars, conveying the idea of unlimited saloons, all
+opening into each other. Three Bohemian vases, filled with natural
+flowers, were placed on pedestals in places where they would be least in
+the way, if it were possible to make such a discrimination. But the
+great feature of the scene was a magnificent paper chandelier of nine
+candles, which hung from the centre of the framework, and made every
+spectator, while he admired, tremble with fear that it would set the
+house on fire.
+
+At a small table in front, covered by a rich cloth, sat the heroine,
+dressed in a gorgeousness of apparel that mocked her misery. Beneath the
+gems that studded her bosom, there was supposed to be unappeasable
+wretchedness; and the white brow, covered with a spangled wreath, was
+presumed to ache with mental agony. She was pale and beautiful. Murmurs
+of applause ran round the apartment.
+
+By her side was the faithful Bidette, armed with a bottle of salts. She
+bent affectionately over her mistress, and asked if she wanted anything.
+
+"Nothing, my child--but death," was the thrilling reply.
+
+Bidette was taken somewhat aback. She made a respectful pause. Then she
+said:
+
+"But, my dear mistress, though you do not love Signor Rodicaso--"
+
+"In Heaven's name, stop, child! You are piercing my heart with a hot
+iron. Name not love to me. Henceforth I erase it from the tablets of my
+brain. Now go on" (with tranquil despair).
+
+"I was about to say, dear mistress, please, that Signor Rodicaso has a
+splendid town house, and a beautiful country seat (they say), and
+thousands of acres of land, which will all be yours--"
+
+The eloquent grief of her mistress's face checked the maid.
+
+"Bidette," she said, "I shall want but a small portion of all his
+lands."
+
+"What do you mean, dear mistress?" asked the frightened maid.
+
+"Only enough for--a grave," was the harrowing reply.
+
+This dreary dialogue was here interrupted by the appearance of the
+father in tights, knee buckles, velvet coat, ruffles, a powdered wig,
+and a general air of having been got up for a great occasion. He
+carefully picked his way through the furniture to his daughter, and
+kissed her on the forehead.
+
+"Are you happy, my dear daughter?" he asked.
+
+"Happy? Oh! yes, father, I am _so_ happy! See how I smile." So saying,
+she made a feeble attempt to smile, which was a most artistic failure,
+and brought out another tribute of applause.
+
+The father, not detecting the sad irony of the smile, replied:
+
+"It is indeed fortunate that you are enabled not only to achieve your
+own happiness by this marriage, but also to redeem what is dearer to me
+than all else in this world--my mercantile credit. But here they come."
+
+"Here they come," was the cue which was to bring in Signor Rodicaso and
+party; but the Signor was momentarily delayed by the giving way of two
+buttons in his doublet. When he had repaired damages with pins as well
+as he could, he emerged into view, accompanied by a notary and a pair of
+friendly witnesses. The Signor, this time, proved to be the author of
+the play, who had kindly consented, at five minutes' notice, to take the
+part in which the hapless Chickson had broken down. Stealing behind, in
+the shadow of the others, was distinctly seen (by all except the people
+on the stage) the burly form of Uncle Bignolio.
+
+To satisfy the conventional idea of dramatic concealment, his left leg
+was plunged in obscurity behind the scenes, while the rest of his figure
+stood out in bold relief. He was observed, by those who watched him
+narrowly, to send a pleasant wink and nod to Bidette, who responded with
+a scarcely perceptible pout.
+
+On the entrance of Signor Rodicaso and friends, Fidelia rose, turned
+toward them, and made a profound courtesy, as if to signify her abject
+submission. Signor Rodicaso bowed with equal profundity, and straightway
+proceeded to make a speech to the lady, in which he spoke of the wild
+idolatry that he had long felt for her, and alluded most disparagingly
+to his own merits. If the Signor's statements could be relied on, he was
+totally unworthy of an alliance with the beautiful Fidelia; in fact, was
+a "dog who would be proud only but to bask in the sunshine of
+her smile."
+
+This singular address, extending over "one length," or forty-five lines,
+excited little less astonishment on the stage than in the audience. For
+it was not set down in the acting copy, but had been improvised by the
+author, to better the part of the Signor, which, as originally written,
+was destitute of Long and effective orations.
+
+Fidelia smiled, and could only reply to this unpremeditated effusion by
+several modest inclinations of the head. The other actors and actress
+turned aside to conceal their grins. Uncle Bignolio alone fulfilled the
+requirements of his part, by casting Mephistophelean leers at the
+Signor, and now and then stealthily shaking his fists at him.
+
+The father, not being apt at off-hand oratory, did not attempt any
+response to this speech, but merely bowed, to express his perfect
+agreement in everything that had been said, and waved his hand toward a
+table in the rear of the stage, as if to say, "Let us proceed to
+business."
+
+The notary, taking the hint, seated himself at the table, opened his
+black bag, drew forth a document from it, and spread it out. Then he
+dipped a pen into an inkstand, and said:
+
+"We now await the signing of the contract of marriage between Signor
+Alessandro Arturo Rodicaso, gentleman, and Signorina Giulia Innocenza
+Fidelia Corpetto, only daughter of Signor Francesco Corpetto, merchant."
+
+In the absence of any definite information on the Venetian formula
+adopted in such cases, the author had selected this style of
+announcement as being sufficiently stiff and imposing.
+
+Signor Rodicaso sprang forward with joyful alacrity to sign the
+contract, dashing off his name in two strokes, as is the invariable
+custom on the stage.
+
+The climax of the drama had now arrived, and everybody stood aside for
+the wretched Fidelia. Mrs. Slapman proved equal to the great occasion.
+Directing one look to heaven, as if for strength, and pressing a hand
+over the jewelled bodice which covered her bursting heart, she walked
+with firm steps toward the fatal table. Never in her life had she been
+more grandly simple. It was sublime!
+
+As Fidelia came up to the little table, she faltered, and leaned upon it
+to support herself; then, with a nervous motion, grasped the pen.
+Several times she dipped the pen in the empty inkstand, and each time
+her face assumed a look of more settled anguish. Then, bracing all her
+nerves for the decisive act of woman's life, she put down the pen
+boldly on the paper, and made one up stroke. Before she could make the
+other down stroke which was necessary to complete her signature, a wild
+figure, with hair dishevelled, and other evidences of hasty purpose,
+burst upon the stage.
+
+Fidelia paused; all stood back; and gentlemen who had swords laid hands
+on them.
+
+"Who is this?" asked the Father, with mercantile calmness.
+
+"Who dares thus break in upon my happiness?" inquired Signor Rodicaso.
+
+"Know you not, young man, that you are committing a breach of the
+peace?" remarked the notary, regarding the intrusion with the eye of
+a lawyer.
+
+The wild figure answered them all at once: "I am Alberto, and I come to
+rend this impious contract--thus--thus--thus!" (snatching the parchment
+from the table, tearing it to pieces, and trampling on it).
+
+Fidelia, astonished at the turn events were taking, leaned back in her
+chair, and looked on silently. Her time for fainting had not yet come.
+
+"Draw and defend yourself, caitiff!" exclaimed Signor Rodicaso,
+brandishing his sword.
+
+"Anywhere but in the presence of a lady," was the sarcastic reply.
+"Besides, I have claims on you, which, perhaps may teach you to
+respect me."
+
+"Claims! Thou liest! What claims?"
+
+"These! Hast seen them before? Ha! ha!" shouted Alberto, shaking a
+bundle of papers in the face of his rival.
+
+"Allow me to examine them, if you please?" asked Signor Rodicaso, with
+forced calmness.
+
+"No, you don't," was the response. "But I'll tell you what they are.
+They are judgments to the extent of one hundred and seventy thousand
+florins--dost hear? one hundred and seventy thousand florins--against
+you, which I have bought for less than quarter price from Jinkerini
+Bros, No. 124 Rialto. With them I offset the sum which this unhappy but
+excellent merchant" (pointing to the father) "owes you. Here, sir; now
+you are released from yon monster's clutches." (Hands package of
+judgments to the father, who, overpowered by the scene, takes and holds
+them in dumb amazement.)
+
+An expression of silent joy begins to steal over the face of Fidelia.
+But her time for fainting had not yet come!
+
+"Boy!" said Signor Rodicaso, with a composure that was perfectly
+wonderful, "there is another hand than thine in all this work. Thou art
+but the poor tool and I despise thee!"
+
+"Here is the hand!" exclaimed the uncle Bignolio, drawing out his leg
+from its seclusion, and bringing his whole body into full view. "Dost
+know it?" He held up his right hand, to carry out the idea of
+the author.
+
+"It is the hand of Bignolio the usurer," said Signor Rodicaso,
+despondingly, seeing now that the game was clearly against him.
+
+"Bignolio the usurer!" exclaimed the father, still wrapped in amazement.
+
+"Bignolio the usurer!" murmured Fidelia, whose woman's wit divined the
+mystery of his appearance. But her time to faint had not _yet_ come.
+
+"Bignolio the usurer!" cried the notary, witnesses, and Bidette in
+chorus.
+
+"Yes," returned that gentleman; "Bignolio the _usurer,_ who now is proud
+to claim the dearer title of 'own uncle' to his nephew Alberto. That
+nephew he this day receives into his partnership, and proclaims his only
+heir. Come to my arms, adopted son!"
+
+Alberto flew to his uncle, and was silently embraced. Even at this
+moment, sacred to the interchange of the noblest affections, several
+persons in the audience distinctly saw the uncle's left eye wink over
+Alberto's shoulder to Bidette, who responded to the unwelcome
+familiarity, this time, with an indignant frown.
+
+The nephew gently uncoiled his uncle, and addressed himself to the
+father:
+
+"Respected sir, I have long loved your daughter, and am not totally
+unprepared to believe that she may, in some slight measure, reciprocate
+my affections. I humbly solicit her hand in marriage."
+
+The father, with the characteristic decision of an old man of business,
+had already made up his mind. Alberto, the young partner and heir of the
+rich usurer of Venice, would be a more manageable son-in-law than the
+middle-aged though wealthy Rodicaso. The father said words to this
+effect in an "aside," and then replied aloud:
+
+"Her hand is yours; and may your union be crowned with felicity. Come,
+children, and receive a parent's blessing."
+
+"My bitter curse be on you all! Boy, we shall meet again!" shouted
+Rodicaso, striding off the stage, and followed by the notary for his
+pay, and by the laughter and scorn of the rest of the company.
+
+Fidelia's little cup of earthly happiness was now full. Her time for
+fainting had arrived at last. Everybody moved to clear a space for her.
+She rose, and walked with an unfaltering step toward Alberto. There was
+no overdone rapture in her gait; no exaggerated ecstasy in her face. As
+a practised critic remarked, "her calmness was the truest expression of
+her agony of joy."
+
+Alberto advanced halfway with a lover's ardor, and extended his arms.
+Then was her time to faint; and she fainted with a slight scream,
+sinking gently upon a faithful breast.
+
+The father raised his hands above the couple, and blessed them in the
+correct way, never seen off the stage. Uncle Bignolio wiped his eyes,
+and murmured, "Dear boy! How much he looks like his father now!"--a
+remark somewhat out of place, considering that Alberto's back was turned
+to the uncle. Bidette hovered near the happy group, and danced for joy.
+
+It was a touching tableau, and the spectators applauded it In a way
+that tickled the heart of the author, who was watching the effect
+through an eyehole of the left wing.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+HOW THE PLAY ENDED.
+
+Just as the curtain was to be rung down on the end of the play, a mad
+clatter of boots was heard behind the scenes. Then a man, dressed in
+complete black, and excessively pale, jumped upon the stage. His black
+hair was tossed all over his head, and his black eyes were rolling
+wildly. Thus much all the spectators saw at a glance.
+
+The strange man's first intention appeared to be to dash at the happy
+couple; but, if so, he checked himself, and, standing at a distance of
+four feet from them, uttered these words: "Scoundrel! what are you doing
+with my wife there?" The man's whole figure could be seen to tremble.
+
+Many of the spectators, supposing this was a part of the play--though
+they did not see its precise connection with the plot--applauded what
+was apparently a fine piece of acting.
+
+"Good!" "Capital!" "Bravo!" were heard from all parts of the room,
+mingled with stamping and clapping.
+
+The man darted looks of concentrated hate at the audience.
+
+"Who is he?" "How well he does it!" "What splendid tragedy powers!" were
+some of the audible remarks that this called forth.
+
+It was also observed that a wonderfully natural style of acting was
+instantly developed among the other _dramatis personae_. Fidelia sprang
+from the arms of Alberto, and put on a lifelike expression of insulted
+dignity, mingled with astonishment. Alberto took a step away from the
+ghastly intruder, and was evidently at a loss what to do. His face was
+eloquent with bewilderment and mortification. The father looked confused
+and sheepish, and put his hands into his pockets. Bidette screamed a
+little, and fled to the opposite scenes. Uncle Bignolio whistled and
+smiled, and was evidently amused at the occurrence.
+
+All this, done in five seconds, so delighted the spectators, that they
+cheered, and cheered again. "As good as a theatre!" ejaculated a new
+friend of Mrs. Slapman's, on the front row.
+
+The strange, disorderly man plunged forward with one leg toward Alberto,
+and then drew himself back suddenly, as if in a state of harassing
+indecision. (Applause.) Then he cast a diabolical look (worthy of the
+elder Booth in Richard III) at the young lover, and shrieked, "Wretch!
+villain! I will--I will--" He hesitated to add what he would do, but
+shook his fists in a highly natural manner at the object of his hate.
+(Great applause.)
+
+"Sir!" said Fidelia, stretching her proud young form erect, like a
+tragedy queen, "How dare you, sir!" (Boisterous applause, and this
+remark from an elderly gentleman: "The picture of Mrs. Siddons!")
+
+The singular individual in black was seen to tremble with increased
+violence. His eyes rolled more wildly, while his face took on a chalkier
+hue. He stepped back, as if to insure his retreat. Then, mustering all
+his resolution, he said:
+
+"M-Mrs. M-Mrs. Slapman, you--you ought to be a-ashamed of yourself!"
+
+The real character of the strange actor was now made evident, and the
+whole house was hushed in awe and expectation. There was not a man or
+woman present but knew too well the folly of mingling in a family
+quarrel. So they held their tongues, and enjoyed the scene.
+
+Mrs. Slapman turned to the audience. She was pale, but perfectly
+composed. She said:
+
+"Ladies and gentlemen, this is my husband, a very quiet and well-behaved
+man, whose only fault is excessive nervousness. This fault, I am sorry
+to say, he encourages, by constantly smoking cigars and drinking strong
+black tea. He has been indulging in both of these stimulants to-night,
+till he is quite beside himself. I trust you will excuse and pity him.
+He has no other vices that I know of."
+
+Then, turning to her husband, whose hands had now dropped listlessly by
+his side, she added:
+
+"My dear, bathe your head, and go to bed immediately."
+
+He struggled to say something in the presence of this calm embodiment of
+satire, but could not. Hanging down his head, and looking very silly, he
+slinked off the stage.
+
+"Now, ladies and gentlemen," said Mrs. Slapman, "after an interval of
+fifteen minutes, we will proceed with the comedietta of 'A Morning
+Call,' as if nothing had happened."
+
+When she had said this, Mrs. Slapman fainted--this time in earnest. She
+was caught in the arms of Fayette Overtop, who immediately, and with the
+utmost delicacy, resigned her to the arms of Miss Wick (Bidette), and of
+several other ladies, who came upon the stage and proffered salts,
+cologne, and other restoratives.
+
+The gentlemen present, actors and audience, unanimously decided that the
+best thing for them to do, under all the circumstances, was to leave
+the premises.
+
+This they did as soon as they could, reserving all discussion of the
+painful event of the evening for the free air of the street.
+
+As Overtop, very serious, and Maltboy, very jovial, were about to
+descend the steps to the sidewalk, they were met by a messenger, who
+desired them to go with him immediately to the station house to see some
+friends (names forgotten) who had been arrested, and had sent for them.
+
+Thither they went, and experienced the greatest surprise of the evening.
+
+
+
+BOOK NINTH.
+
+THE INQUEST.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+Coroner and Jury.
+
+The post-mortem examination had been held; and three doctors had sworn
+that deceased came to his death from a great variety of Greek and Latin
+troubles, all caused by a learned something which signified, in plain
+English, a blow on the head. Coroner Bullfast was so struck with the
+clear and explicit nature of the medical evidence, that he had it
+reduced to writing for his private regalement.
+
+The post-mortem examination, and the testimony of the three doctors, and
+of all the people in the house (except Patty Minford, daughter of the
+deceased)--whose joint knowledge upon the subject amounted to nothing
+more than hearing somebody with heavy boots come down stairs about
+midnight--occupied the whole of the first day. Patty, or Pet, was so
+thoroughly unnerved by the events of that horrible night, that the
+coroner found it impossible to take her evidence on that day. She had
+fainted twice before she could make Coroner Bullfast clearly understand
+that Marcus Wilkeson, her benefactor, and her father's best friend, was
+THE MURDERER. Having learned thus much, the coroner had put the police
+on the track of Marcus Wilkeson, and had postponed the further
+examination of the chief witness.
+
+Mrs. Crull, on learning of the tragic affair, had gone in person to the
+house of death, and taken Patty to her own home.
+
+The remains of the unfortunate inventor had been removed to the nearest
+undertaker's for interment, at the expense of Mrs. Crull. The apartments
+had been diligently searched, and the personal effects of the deceased
+examined, under the direction of the coroner. A number of documents had
+been discovered, which, in the coroner's opinion, threw a flood of light
+on the motives that led to the crime. A few dollars and a bull's-eye
+silver watch, found on the dead body, precluded the idea that the murder
+was done for plunder. With that quickness of perception for which
+Coroner Bullfast, like most of his official kind, was celebrated, he had
+formed his theory of the murder, and tremendously strong must be the
+future testimony that could shake it.
+
+On the morning of the second day, Coroner Bullfast and the jury
+reassembled, about ten o'clock, in the room where the murder was
+committed.
+
+The coroner was a jovial man, with a bulging forehead, a ruddy nose, a
+large diamond breastpin (a real diamond, of that superlative style only
+seen in its perfection on the shirt fronts of aldermen, contractors, and
+Washington Market butchers), and the native New York manner of speaking,
+which is sharp and mandatory. The coroner began life as a stone mason,
+gained early distinction as a fireman, controlled several hundred votes
+in his ward, became a member of a political committee, and got a
+coronership as his share of the spoils. He had aspired to be a police
+justice, or city inspector, or commissioner of the Croton Board. To
+either of these positions, or, for that matter, to any position
+indefinitely higher, he felt himself perfectly equal. But other members
+of the committee (which was a kind of joint-stock company for the
+distribution of offices) had prior and stronger claims than Harry
+Bullfast, and so he was put off with a coronership. He felt the slight
+acutely, but, like a prudent man, determined to so keep himself before
+the public in his performance of the office, as to make it a stepping
+stone to something much higher--the city comptrollership, or a seat in
+the State Senate, or in Congress, or (who could tell?) the governorship
+of the commonwealth--that grand possibility which every ward politician
+carries in his hat.
+
+The coroner was seated in the inventor's private armchair, with one leg
+thrown over the side of it, and the other stretched on the floor. He was
+chewing tobacco with manly vigor, and cracking jokes with a facetious
+juryman, who was assistant foreman of the Bully Boy Hose, of which the
+coroner was an exempt and honorary member.
+
+The jury was composed of six men whom the coroner had picked from the
+large number of idle spectators found by him at the scene of the murder
+when he was first summoned. Two of them chanced to be acquaintances of
+his. As to the rest, the coroner had not the remotest idea. They might
+have been beggars or pickpockets, for aught that he cared. They looked
+stupid, and he liked stupid jurors.
+
+"Them sharp fellers that thinks they knows more'n the cor'ner, is a
+cussed nuisance," he often had occasion to remark.
+
+The jury sat near one of the windows, in a semicircle of chairs which
+had been borrowed from the first and second floors. Pending the
+resumption of their melancholy work, such of them as could read were
+reading newspapers containing reports of the first day's proceedings,
+from two to ten columns long, wherein the scene of the "Mysterious
+Midnight Tragedy," as one paper called it, was represented in the most
+ingenious manner by printers' rules cut to show the dimensions of the
+rooms on the third floor, the position of the fireplace, bed, washstand,
+chest of drawers, unknown machine in the corner, and other things which
+had no bearing whatever on the affair. The other jurors, who could not
+read at all, or had an insuperable aversion to that laborious
+occupation, were rolling their quids in silence, and looking wise.
+
+At a long table in the centre of the room were seated several young
+gentlemen, dressed with singular independence of style. From one point
+of view they looked like actors, bearing about them signs of fatigue, as
+if from heavy night work. Observed again, they resembled young lawyers
+of indolent habits and scanty practice, who had just dropped in to
+watch the case.
+
+From their conversation, no clue to their professional identity could be
+gathered. They were cracking jokes, propounding conundrums, and telling
+stories humorously broad to each other. Everything was to them a
+legitimate amusement. The proceedings of the day before were peculiarly
+rich in funny reminiscences; and one tall, bright, curly-haired fellow
+was evoking roars of suppressed laughter by his capital mimicry of two
+of the dullest witnesses. Another was drawing comic profiles of a sleepy
+juryman on a scrap of paper. He had previously dashed off a very happy
+sketch of the coroner, and shown it to that functionary, who had
+"haw-hawed," and pronounced it "devilish good," and, in turn, presented
+the young artist with a fine Havana cigar, which he playfully put in his
+mouth and chewed the end of. Yet there were, about these young
+gentlemen, signs of business, which an intelligent observer might have
+easily interpreted. From the outside breast pockets of each of them
+protruded a number of pencils; and, from their lower side pockets, thick
+memorandum books with gray covers, or stiffly folded quires of foolscap.
+
+They were the reporters of the press--the gamins and good fellows of
+literature;--fellows of inexhaustible resources, who carry their wits
+literally at their fingers' ends;--who can do more than extract sunbeams
+from cucumbers; for they can make up thrilling facts out of
+nothing;--who can thread their way through a crowd where a tapeworm
+would be squeezed to death;--whose writing desk is usually another man's
+back; and who sketch out a much better speech between an orator's
+shoulder blades than he is making in front;--whose written language is
+a perplexity compared with which Greek is a relaxation and Sanscrit a
+positive amusement;--who deal in adjectives, and know their precise
+value, and how to administer them, as an apothecary knows the drugs that
+are boxed and bottled on his shelves;--who are less men than parts of an
+enormous mill grinding out grist to be branned and bolted in the
+editorial rooms, made into food in the printing office and press vault,
+and served up hot for the public's breakfast next morning.
+
+Clever, witty, insatiable fellows they, for whom a planet ought to be
+set apart, where all the murders are wrapped in impenetrable mystery,
+and the smallest railroad accidents are frightful catastrophes.
+
+The east side of the room, where the dead body had been found, was
+preserved inviolate from the broom, mop, and other touch, until the
+inquest was over. The strange machine stood in its accustomed place,
+flanked by the screen. It had been extensively handled and looked at,
+and passed for a new kind of clock. Two large weights (which had fallen
+to the floor) and the interplaying cogwheels gave force to that
+conjecture.
+
+A large purple spot on the floor showed where the old man's life had
+ebbed away. Close by this spot, precisely where it had been picked up,
+lay the long oaken club with the iron tip, which, it was supposed, had
+done the dreadful deed. There were small splashes and spots on it too.
+
+The fun of the reporters, the chat of the coroner and his friends, the
+readings and airy meditations of the jurors, were all suddenly checked
+by the appearance of Marcus Wilkeson, escorted by two police officers,
+and Messrs. Overtop and Maltboy, Patching and Tiffles. All five had
+passed the night in the station house--Messrs. Patching and Tiffles from
+compulsion, as witnesses, and possible accomplices, and Overtop and
+Maltboy as guides, philosophers, and friends. All looked seedy and
+criminal, as if there were something in the atmosphere of station houses
+to give a man the semblance of a vagabond and an outcast. Marcus
+Wilkeson was very pale, and, when he looked across the room, as he did
+upon his entrance, by a singular impulse, and saw the great blood mark
+and the club on the floor, he trembled with emotion.
+
+The keen eyes of the coroner caught these signs, and he immediately
+brought in a mental verdict of "guilty." Some of the jury observed the
+same signs, and thought them suspicious. The reporters looked upon
+Marcus Wilkeson without emotion or prejudgment. They were so accustomed
+to seeing murderers, that they regarded them simply as a part of the
+business community--a little vicious, perhaps, but not so much worse
+than other people, after all. One reporter, attached to an illustrated
+paper, dashed off the profile of Marcus Wilkeson, under the cover of his
+hat, and caught the dejected expression of his face to a nicety.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+STATEMENT OF THE PRISONER.
+
+The coroner received Marcus with that air of consideration which
+magistrates instinctively bestow upon persons charged with great crimes,
+and informed him, with some respect, that he was brought there to make
+any explanation that he saw fit, touching his connection with "this
+'ere murder."
+
+The party were then accommodated with seats near the jury, and facing
+the reporters. As Marcus looked up, and saw those practised scribes
+sharpening their pencils, his heart sank deeper within him. The vision
+which had troubled him all night, of a broadside notoriety in all the
+city papers, rose before his mind, clothed with fresh horror. The dull
+sound of sharpening those pencils was like the whetting of the
+executioner's knife.
+
+The proper course was to have accepted an unsworn statement from the
+prisoner; but the coroner always administered oaths when prisoners were
+willing to take them. The repetition of that jargon with a profane
+conclusion (for so it seemed, in the slipshod way that it was said),
+which the coroner called an oath, was a positive pleasure to that
+official. As Marcus desired to take the oath, the coroner rattled off
+the unintelligible something, and handed him a Bible, which the prisoner
+pressed reverentially to his lips. Marcus, being now supposed to be
+sworn, proceeded, with what firmness he could muster, to answer the
+numerous interrogatories of the coroner. That official chewed hard, and,
+as it were, spit out his questions.
+
+His testimony, in substance, was this:
+
+That he was a friend of the deceased, and had loaned him one thousand
+dollars to complete a machine upon which he was engaged--pointing to the
+unfinished pile in the corner. That his relations with the deceased and
+his family (Marcus did not like to mention Pet's name) were entirely
+agreeable, until an anonymous letter, charging him with improper motives
+in visiting the house, had poisoned the mind of the deceased against
+him. [The giving up of this letter to the coroner, who read it to the
+jury, and then tossed it over to the reporters for copying, was a hard
+trial, but Marcus had resolved upon meeting all the troubles of the
+case halfway.]
+
+The coroner here produced the second anonymous letter, which had been
+found on the person of the deceased, showed it to Marcus for
+identification, and then threw it to the reporters, as one would throw a
+choice bone to a cage full of hungry animals.
+
+Marcus explained that he had made every effort to discover the
+authorship of the letters, without success; whereupon the coroner shut
+his eyes knowingly, rolled his quid from right to left, and said that he
+was "investigatin' 'em" himself.
+
+QUESTION BY A JUROR. "Wos the letters postpaid?"
+
+ANSWER. "They were."
+
+The juror took the reply into his profoundest consideration.
+
+Marcus, resuming, stated that, on his last visit--the night of the
+supposed murder--he had found Mr. Minford very much disturbed in mind by
+the unjust suspicions aroused by these letters. He had accused witness
+of the vile intentions referred to in them. Witness had denied the
+imputations with emphasis. The discussion was becoming quite warm, when
+the daughter of the deceased entered the room, and, being worn out with
+watching by the side of a sick friend, retired to bed in the adjoining
+chamber. The conversation, broken off by her entrance, was then
+continued, much in the same vein. Mr. Minford was in a distressing state
+of nervous excitement that evening, and talked loud and wild. Witness
+made an effort to keep his temper, and did so, though the peculiar
+injustice of the accusations were enough to arouse any man's anger. He
+reserved his show of wrath for the author of the anonymous letters, if
+he could ever catch him. He would not say that he had not replied to the
+deceased with some warmth of manner. But as to threatening him, or
+hurting one hair of his head, witness had not done it--so help him God!
+
+QUESTION BY A JUROR. "Was the key of the door in the keyhole that
+night?"
+
+ANSWER. "I don't know."
+
+COMMENT BY FACETIOUS JUROR. "Be me sowl, I thinks that whishkay had more
+to do with it than the doorkay. Don't you, Harry?"
+
+CORONER. "Bully for you!"
+
+Clothing himself again with dignity, the coroner asked:
+
+"Der yer mean to say, Mr. Wilkingson, that yer didn't kill this man?
+Remember, now, yer on yer oath!"
+
+The horrible bluntness of the question nearly felled Marcus to the
+floor. He placed his hand on his brow, now pale with the acutest
+anguish. Then he rose, and, looking upward said:
+
+"As God is my judge, and as I hope for heaven, I am innocent of this
+murder, or of any part in it."
+
+"If you please, Mr. Coroner, this gentleman and myself are counsel for
+the accused," said Overtop.
+
+"Oh! you're his counsel. Then the other two are the chaps arrested as
+'complices?"
+
+Patching writhed at this. Nor were his feelings relieved by observing,
+with an oblique glance, that the artist of the illustrated paper was in
+the act of taking him.
+
+"I protest," said Wesley Tiffles, rising to his full height, and
+throwing out both arms for a comprehensive gesture, "I protest against
+this arrest and detention as illegal. If the coroner will give me but a
+short hour of his valuable time, I can--"
+
+CORONER _(puffing up_). "The gentleman will be good enough to shut up
+for the present. When we are ready, we will hear what he has to say."
+
+TIFFLES. "I protest, sir. I wish the gentlemanly and intelligent
+reporters to note that I protest--"
+
+CORONER. "Are you, or me, boss here, hey?"
+
+TIFFLES. "Oh! you, of course, sir." The protestant then sank into his
+seat, not wholly disappointed, for he had gained his object of making a
+little newspaper capital by tickling the reporters. He had also
+remarked, with pleasure, that, while he stood erect, with both arms
+outstretched, the artist had secured his full length. Tiffles was fond
+of notoriety, however achieved; and he saw a good opening for it in
+this case.
+
+Overtop here suggested that it would be easy to prove their client's
+innocence. He would respectfully request his Honor to procure the
+testimony of Miss Patty Minford, if she could be found. As she went to
+bed in the adjoining room early that evening, she must have heard some
+noise in connection with the murder--if, indeed, a murder had been
+committed. Overtop's legal education taught him to doubt everything.
+
+Coroner Bullfast was touched with the title of Honor, so skilfully
+applied by Overtop; and he answered, with uncommon sweetness:
+
+"I am expecting Miss Minford every minute, sir. She will speak for
+herself. For the present, sir, I am sorry to say that it was on her
+testimony alone that Mr. Wilkingson was 'rested."
+
+A look of new surprise and horror passed over the pale face of Marcus,
+and Overtop and Maltboy exchanged glances of astonishment.
+
+"Now, Mr. Wilkingson," continued the coroner, taking a fresh chew,
+"please drive ahead with yer statement--if yer choose to. Yer not bound
+to say anythink, yer know."
+
+AN INTELLIGENT JUROR. "Will Mr. Wilkeson tell us about what time he left
+this house that night, and where he went?"
+
+Marcus raised his sunken head, and shook it, as if to dispel a
+stupefaction. Then, in a faint and trembling voice, he replied that he
+looked at his watch just before bidding Mr. Minford "good-night,"
+and-observed that it was fifteen minutes past eleven o'clock.
+
+QUESTION BY A JUROR. "What kind o' watch do you carry?"
+
+ANSWER (_exhibiting the watch_). "An English hunter--- lever
+escapement--- full jewelled."
+
+At any other time, Marcus would have smiled at the impertinence of the
+question, but he answered it gravely.
+
+He then went on to say, that Mr. Minford had not replied to his
+"good-night." That he repeated the salutation, and extended his hand as
+a token of unbroken friendship. That Mr. Minford refused to take it, and
+said that he had one last favor to ask of him (Marcus), and that was,
+never to cross his threshold again. That he (Marcus) responded, "I
+forgive you, sir. When, on reflection, you think that you have done me
+injustice--as you will, at last--send for me, and I will still be your
+friend." That he received no answer to this, save a shake of the head,
+and immediately went down stairs into the street. He was feverish, and
+his brain was in a whirl. Hardly knowing what he did, he walked the
+streets hither and thither. He could not tell what streets he traversed,
+but he kept up the exercise till he was tired. Then he became calmer,
+returned home, entered the house with a latch key, and went to bed
+without waking any of the inmates. On going to bed, he observed that his
+watch marked one o'clock.
+
+An intelligent juror. "You must have passed a large number of people in
+the streets between eleven and one o'clock. Did you see no one whom
+you knew?"
+
+"No one; but at a corner some distance from here,--I could not say what
+corner,--I noticed a policeman sitting on a barrel in front of a
+grocery, smoking. He was a short, fat man, and his legs hardly reached
+to the pavement. I remember him the more particularly, because I stopped
+and lighted a cigar at his pipe. Just at that moment, the City Hall bell
+commenced striking a fire alarm."
+
+"What was the district?" asked the juror who was assistant foreman of
+the Bully Boy Hose.
+
+"The Seventh. I counted the strokes. I walked on rapidly, and soon came
+up with another policeman, who was leaning against a grocery store. I
+said to him, 'A cold night, Mr. Policeman,' and I think he would
+remember that circumstance, if he could be found. Just after I had
+passed him, the alarm bells struck the last round. Three or four rounds
+had been struck."
+
+The assistant foreman of the Bully Boy Hose, having referred to a
+memorandum book which he drew from a breast pocket, here exclaimed:
+
+"The alarm was at twenty-five minutes of twelve. Nothing but a chimney
+in Whitehall street. We run into Twenty's fellers, comin' back, and had
+a nice little row. Ever belong to the department, sir?"
+
+Marcus answered "No;" and the pyrophilist looked compassionately upon
+him, as upon one who had never known true happiness.
+
+"If you never run with the mersheen," observed the coroner, "you do'
+'no' wot life is. As for me, sir, it's my boast and pride that I have
+been a member of the New York Fire Department for more'n twenty years.
+It wos the backin' of the boys that made me a coroner; and, thank God!
+I'm never ashamed to tell 'em so."
+
+The coroner spoke truly. So far from being ashamed to "tell 'em so," he
+was always "telling 'em so," never missing an opportunity, at political
+meetings, to inform the firemen that he was "one of 'em," and that no
+mark of honor, even from the President of the United States, was equal
+to his fireman's badge. The continual "telling of 'em so" had aided in
+procuring for him his present official distinction, and was destined to
+earn higher honors for him at a future day.
+
+The coroner tore off a fresh chew from a half hand of Cavendish which
+had been well gnawed at all the edges, and told Marcus that he might
+"fire away" again.
+
+Marcus then proceeded to state that, on the morning after the eventful
+night, he woke up early. His dreams had been horrible, and his waking
+reflections were no less distressing. The thought that Mr. Minford
+should have suspected him, thus unjustly, of the basest of crimes, and
+that they, who had been such good friends, should have parted in a way
+that effectually cut off reconciliation; and the other thought, that
+this mischief had been wrought by some unscrupulous enemy, when he had
+always fondly believed that he never could have a foe in the
+world--these thoughts, occurring with great force to a nervous and
+sensitive man, nearly maddened him. He felt that if he remained in the
+house that day, as usual, and brooded over his troubles, he would grow
+crazy. While he was pondering what to do, his eyes chanced to fall on an
+invitation which he had received from Mr. Wesley Tiffles, to meet him at
+the Cortlandt street ferry at seven and a quarter o'clock that morning,
+and accompany him and his panorama of Africa to New Jersey. The day
+before, when this invitation came to hand, he had determined not to
+accept it; but it now seemed to offer him a capital chance to see some
+excitement and ran. As these remedies were precisely what his mental
+malady required, he jumped to dress himself, and hurried out of the
+house, seeing nobody as he made his exit, and leaving no word of
+explanation. He took no luggage, except a clean collar, as he intended
+to return the following day. He was even so careless and forgetful as to
+leave his purse behind him, and found, on reaching the ferry, that he
+had barely two dollars in his pocket.
+
+QUESTION BY A JUROR. "Wos they bank bills; and, if so, what bank wos
+they on?"
+
+Marcus answered the question to the best of his knowledge, and the juror
+sagely nodded, and took the reply under treatment.
+
+"I say, Tubbs," cried the coroner, "wot's the use of askin' them kind o'
+questions?"
+
+Tubbs looked up from his ruminations, somewhat confused. The politic
+Overtop--that model of a rising lawyer--here put in a word for Tubbs,
+and said that the question, in his opinion, was a very pertinent one,
+for it went to test the memory of his client. If Mr. Wilkeson had just
+committed murder, he would hardly be in that calm frame of mind which is
+necessary to the recollection of small facts. He hoped that the
+ingenious gentleman would ask many more such questions. By these
+judicious remarks, Overtop gained one fast friend for his client on
+the jury.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+JUSTICE GOES TO DINNER.
+
+Wesley Tiffles was then examined. He commenced with an eloquent
+dissertation on the rights of man, and his own rights in particular, but
+stopped when he saw that the reporters tucked their pencils behind their
+ears, and waited for facts. The moment he began to talk facts--which are
+to reporters what corn is to crows--down came the pencils from their
+perches again, and went tripping over the paper.
+
+Mr. Tiffles's testimony would have consumed two hours, or two days,
+perhaps, if he had been allowed to go on unchecked. But the coroner had
+been invited to dine at a Broadway restaurant, with a few political
+friends, at three P.M. So he concluded, after Tiffles had talked five
+minutes, that he knew nothing about the murder, and could throw no
+light on it, and told Tiffles that he was not wanted further.
+
+"And you mean to tell me, sir, that I am not to be locked up in the
+station house to-night," said Tiffles.
+
+"No, unless yer want ter be."
+
+"Of course not--of course not." But the interior Tiffles was
+disappointed at this sudden and unromantic termination of his case. A
+few more nights in the station house, or in the Tombs, would have given
+him capital material for a book, of which he had already projected the
+first chapter. He sat down, and execrated his ill luck.
+
+Patching, the artist, was then interrogated, to the extent of two
+minutes, and corroborated Tiffles's testimony as to the sad and strange
+appearance of Mr. Wilkeson on the day after the supposed murder.
+Patching was then informed by the coroner that his further attendance at
+the inquest would not be required.
+
+Patching, on rising, had assumed the attitude of Paul before Felix, as
+set forth in some ancient cartoon; and in that position of mingled
+innocence, dignity, and defiance, the artist of the illustrated paper
+got a spirited sketch of him. Had Patching dreamed how capitally his
+long hair, peaked beard, thin nose, and bony forehead would be taken
+off, in a rough but faithful character portrait, he would have sunk in
+confusion. Happily, the newspaper artist was sitting almost behind his
+more pretentious brother of the canvas, and the latter knew not what had
+been done, until, the following week, he saw a striking intensification
+of himself staring into the street from numerous bulletin boards and
+shop windows.
+
+Before sitting down, Mr. Patching begged to explain to the jury, and to
+the public through the reporters (who did not take down a word of the
+explanation), that he had painted the panorama of Africa to oblige his
+friend, "Wesley Tiffles. It was hardly necessary for him to say, in this
+community, that he was more at home among higher walks of Art.
+
+"Are you a sign painter, Mr. Patching?" asked the coroner. "No, sir; I
+am not," said Patching, with dignified contempt.
+
+"Perhaps you're a carriage painter, then? Them's the fellers for
+picturin'. The woman and flowers on the Bully Boys' hose carriage wos
+well done. Hey, Jack?"
+
+"That it wos, Harry," returned the assistant foreman of the Bully Boys.
+"If Patching can do that sort o' thing, he'll pass."
+
+Patching fixed looks of professional indignation on the coroner and the
+assistant foreman, and sat down gloomily, amid the suppressed laughter
+of the irreverent reporters.
+
+The coroner then looked at his watch, and, finding that the time was
+within half an hour of dinner, said that the inquest would be adjourned
+till the following morning, at ten o'clock.
+
+"But, your Honor," said Overtop, "--that is, if you will allow me to
+make the suggestion--couldn't you give us an hour longer? Nothing has
+yet been heard from Miss Minford, who, you said, was expected to be in
+attendance to-day. Will you be good enough to send to Mrs. Crull's
+house for her?"
+
+"Really, I can't wait," replied the coroner. "The young lady must be
+sick, or she would have been here before now."
+
+"But--pardon me, your Honor--we are anxious to have Miss Minford brought
+on the stand this afternoon, believing, that her testimony alone will
+acquit our client."
+
+"You believe so, because you do' 'no' what it is. But, as I said before,
+it wos on Miss Minford's statement that Mr. Wilkingson there was
+'rested. And the best advice I can give him is to take a good night's
+rest, and get his nerves ready for the young woman's testimony
+to-morrow, for it'll be a staggerer." The coroner consulted his watch
+again, with evident impatience, and rose from his seat.
+
+Overtop essayed to speak again; but the coroner interrupted him with,
+"The inquest is 'journed till to-morrer, at ten o'clock. Mr. Policeman,
+you will take the prisoner back to the station house."
+
+This speech was torture to Overtop and Maltboy, who, believing firmly
+in their friend's innocence, were convinced that a full investigation of
+the case that day would procure his acquittal. They turned eyes of
+exhaustless friendship and sympathy toward him.
+
+Marcus was in that half-comatose state which is the stupid reaction from
+an intense and painful excitation of the nerves. He was morbidly calm.
+The opinion of the coroner, that Miss Minford's testimony would be a
+"staggerer," had no more effect on him than it would have had on the
+most phlegmatic reader of the case in next morning's paper.
+
+"Then, your Honor, we must ask you to take bail," said Overtop.
+
+"Can't take bail! Can't take anything but my dinner, to-day! For the
+third time, I say, the inquest is adjourned." The coroner hastily put on
+his spring overcoat.
+
+Overtop was tempted to make a fierce reply; but the legal discretion in
+which he was educated restrained him.
+
+The word had gone forth. The jurors rose, yawned, and grasped their
+hats. The reporters jammed their notes into their pockets, and
+precipitately fled from the room. The policeman escorted Marcus Wilkeson
+and his counsel, and Tiffles and Patching, to the carriage which brought
+them, and which still stood in front of the house, an object of tragic
+interest to a large crowd of men, women, and children, who had remained
+about the doorway during the inquest, and could not be dispersed by the
+policemen.
+
+"Which is he?" "Who's the murderer?" whispered twenty voices, as the
+party emerged from the stairs upon the sidewalk.
+
+"That's him! That chap with the big hat and long hair. You could pick
+him out of a million," said a shrewd observer.
+
+"What ugly eyes he's got! They're sharp enough to stab ye," added a shop
+girl.
+
+"I seen some pirates hung, when I was a little gal," remarked an old
+woman, "and they were pooty compared to him."
+
+The object of these and other remarks was the unhappy Patching, who had
+not yet got over his wrath at the coroner, and was scowling and
+compressing his lips very like a murderer.
+
+The policeman and his companions, all but the spell-bound Marcus, could
+not help laughing at these ridiculous mistakes. But Patching turned upon
+the crowd, and delivered among them one withering look of scorn, which
+fully confirmed them in the belief that he was a murderer of the deepest
+dye. And when the carriage rolled away, it was followed by a volley of
+groans, mixed with a few pebbles, handfuls of mud, and other missiles
+which happened to be lying around loose.
+
+"Here, boys, don't act that way," said the coroner, who had just made
+his appearance on the sidewalk. "Let the poor devil go. It's a case of
+murder, clear, enough; and he won't slip through my hands easy, I can
+tell ye, if he _is_ rich." The coroner spoke good-naturedly, for he saw
+several of his political adherents among the throng.
+
+"That's the talk!" "Good boy!" "You're the feller for us!" were some of
+the warm responses.
+
+The coroner smiled, as he stopped to light a cigar from the pipe of a
+dirty admirer, and then, bowing obsequiously to the group, he stalked
+off in a rowdy way in the direction of his expected dinner.
+
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+LIGHT IN THE PRISON.
+
+On the return of the prisoner and friends to the station house, Marcus
+was gratified to find a number of old business acquaintances waiting for
+him in the ante-room. They were men whom he had known in his Wall-street
+epoch, and had always set down as good-enough friends in prosperity, but
+cold-shouldered creatures in an hour of trial. He was mistaken, as many
+men are mistaken, in judging the hearts of business men from their
+white and careworn faces. They came with warm hands, sympathetic words,
+and offers of bail money and other aid, if wanted. There were short
+notes from two or three other old fellows whom he had not seen for
+years, telling him that they were at his command.
+
+These expressions of good will touched Marcus to the heart. He learned
+that, in the self-conceit of his retired and studious life, he had done
+injustice to these citizens of the whirling world. With a thousand
+thanks for the kindness of his callers, he told them that their friendly
+services were not needed; that his innocence would surely be made to
+appear; and that, to the day of his death, he should never forget them.
+Upon this assurance, repeated two or three times, his business friends
+withdrew with characteristic business impetuosity, wishing him a speedy
+release from his disagreeable position--which is the roundabout phrase
+for prison.
+
+A policeman, who had charge of the station house during the absence of
+his superior officer, here informed Marcus that an old lady and a young
+one, an old gen'leman and a lad, had called. The old gen'leman and the
+lad would drop round again during the evening. The old lady and the
+young one were waiting for him in the captain's room.
+
+He entered the captain's room--his companions staying outside--and saw,
+as he expected, his half-sister Philomela, and a young woman dressed in
+the height of cheap fashion, who was no other than Mash, the cook.
+
+His sister rose, and extended her hand to him severely, and said, with a
+solemn voice:
+
+"Brother Marcus, I am sorry to see you here. I hope you are not guilty
+of this crime?"
+
+"Hope?" said Marcus, stung to the quick. "Why not say at once that I am
+guilty? It is strange that the only relative I have on earth should be
+the first to doubt my innocence."
+
+"Oh, no, Marcus! You do me injustice there. I do not for a moment doubt
+your innocence. But you know I always advised you to give up your
+moping habits at home, and go into active business, like other men of
+your age. If you had been in business now, you wouldn't have had time to
+get mixed up in the affairs of this old man Minford and his daughter,
+and would have escaped this disgrace. I trust, Marcus," she added,
+emphatically, "I trust this will be a lesson to you."
+
+Poor Mash, the cook, had been playing with her bonnet strings, and
+trying to check her tears. But the unnatural effort was too much for
+her, and she burst out crying.
+
+"Oh, Mr. Wilkeson!" she said, between her sobs, "I--I'm so sorry to see
+you here; b-but I--I know yer innocent. Boo-boo-hoo!"
+
+"Thank you, Mash," replied Marcus, quite affected at this sudden
+outbreak of sympathy. "_You_ speak like a true woman. But don't cry any
+more, my good girl. I shall be released to-morrow." Marcus said this
+confidently--though he had not the least idea how his acquittal was to
+be obtained.
+
+"Oh! I hope so--I--hope so, Mr. Wilkeson. Boo-boo-hoo--I--I wish I could
+g-go to prison in your place. Boo-boo-hoo!"
+
+Mash had derived this preposterous idea of vicarious imprisonment from
+the story of "The Buttery and the Boudoir," which was now drawing near
+its conclusion, and gradually killing, or marrying off, its heroes
+and heroines.
+
+Marcus could not help smiling at the romantic notion. Miss Philomela
+laughed sarcastically, and exclaimed:
+
+"You must take pattern from me, girl, and control your feelings. My
+brother doesn't want crying women about him at this time."
+
+"Don't be too sure of that, sister. Tears come naturally from a woman.
+They are her best evidence of sympathy, and therefore precious to one
+who needs it."
+
+Mash, the cook, gave vent to a fresh shower of tears at this encouraging
+remark, and made Miss Philomela shrug her shoulders in disgust.
+
+"Oh! _don't_ be silly. Mash!" said Miss Philomela, losing all patience
+with the cook.
+
+"I--I--boo-boo-hoo!--can't help it, marm."
+
+"Nonsense!" said the superior female. "As for you, Marcus, you should
+not encourage such folly, when you have troubles that demand our sober
+and earnest attention. With reference to the past, I might say a great
+many things, but I forbear. To be serious, now--for once in your
+life--what can I do for you?"
+
+"Will you do what I ask, faithfully?" asked Marcus.
+
+"Yes, faithfully. I promise."
+
+"Then, my sister, be so good as to go home immediately, and send me a
+spare shirt and a change of clothes. Mash can bring them. And, lest
+another interview should prove too severe a trial for your female
+sensibility, I beg that you will not come here again. If I want you very
+much, I can send for you."
+
+"You are very unkind--very unkind. But I will not make any remarks. You
+know that nothing would give me greater pleasure than to serve my
+brother. For, though you have faults--I suppose you will not deny that
+you have some little faults--you are still my brother."
+
+Marcus smiled, and thought how foolish it was to quarrel with the
+whimsical but not bad-hearted woman. "Well, sister Philomela, you can
+see for yourself that I am not ill used here. Comfortable bed, rousing
+fire, and warm meals from the restaurant round the corner! The
+lieutenant[1] who is in command of this station house turns out to be an
+old friend of my boyhood, and treats me more like a guest than a
+prisoner. And I must say, that, but for the idea of a prison, I could
+live as pleasantly here as at home. Even you can do nothing to lighten
+my captivity. But I promise, that _if_ I am held by this coroner's
+jury--which, of course, I shall not be--and am sent to the Tombs, then I
+will tax your sisterly affection to the utmost."
+
+[Footnote 1: Called sergeant of police under the recent Metropolitan
+Act.]
+
+At the mention of that dreadful place, the "Tombs," Mash broke into
+sobs again. The touching experiences of Gerald Florville in that house
+of despair--as set forth in "The Buttery and the Boudoir"--were
+poignantly brought to her mind.
+
+Miss Philomela looked serious as the Tombs loomed up in her mind, and
+she would have said something condoling, but for the irritating conduct
+of the cook, who annoyed her so much that she decided to leave. She
+abruptly shook hands with her half-brother. "It is very easy," said she,
+"to point out how certain mistakes might have been avoided. But let the
+past go. If you are not acquitted to-morrow, I shall call here again,
+notwithstanding you don't seem very desirous to see me. Now, good-by.
+Come, hurry up, Mash!"
+
+Marcus shook hands with his half-sister, and also with Mash, who wept
+afresh.
+
+In the ante-room, Miss Philomela saw Overtop and Maltboy, upon whom she
+bestowed a half smile, and Tiffles, whom she treated to a cordial
+grimace, not unmingled with a blush. Tiffles, on his part, was
+profoundly polite, and inquired if she were going home. Learning that
+she was, he remarked that he had occasion to walk in the same direction,
+and accompanied her as she left the station house. Mash followed at a
+short distance behind, not because she did not think herself fully as
+good as Miss Philomela, but because she wished to indulge unchecked in
+the mild luxury of tears.
+
+A new visitor was now announced. He was a curly-headed, neatly dressed
+boy of nineteen years. His face was one that is handsomer in promise
+than in fact. Marcus recognized him as the boy Bog, whom he had not seen
+for several weeks. The boy had developed a remarkable talent for making
+money honestly. For two months he had attended a night school, and was
+fast correcting his awkward English, and attaining to other knowledge.
+Prosperity and schooling together had given him quite a polish. The
+rough boy was coming to be a presentable youth.
+
+He advanced timidly toward Marcus, who shook hands with him. He sat down
+before the fire, and commenced fumbling his cap in the old way. "With
+the exception of that trick, and his shyness, there was little of the
+original boy Bog about him,
+
+"Mr. Wilkeson," said he, giving his cap a twirl, "I am very sorry to see
+you here; because, I may say, I _know_ you are innocent."
+
+The positive manner in which the boy asserted this, charmed Marcus, "I
+thank you, my dear Bog," said he; "but how do you know it? For, though I
+am innocent, I may have some trouble in proving it."
+
+The boy drew a small folded note from his pocket. "I'll explain, sir,"
+said he.
+
+Marcus here called in his counsel, Messrs. Overtop and Maltboy, and his
+good friend the lieutenant of police, who had just arrived in the outer
+room, in order that they might hear the explanation.
+
+The boy was embarrassed by his audience; but the anxious look of Marcus,
+and a few kind words from the lieutenant of police, reassured him. Bog
+then proceeded to tell what he knew of the strange young man's
+acquaintance with Miss Patty Minford--which was very easily told, since
+it did not amount to much--and concluded by opening the letter given to
+him by the young man for delivery to Miss Minford, and handed it
+to Marcus.
+
+Marcus glanced at the writing, expecting that it would resemble that of
+the first anonymous letter addressed to Mr. Minford, which he drew from
+his pocket for comparison. But the writing was totally different in
+inclination, thickness of the downward stroke, and all other respects.
+He read it aloud, his counsel and the lieutenant of police listening
+attentively.
+
+"I don't know much about the case yet," said the lieutenant, "but,
+jumping at a conclusion, I should say that this sneaking chap was
+jealous of your intimacy with the Minford family; that he wrote the
+anonymous letters to the old man, in a different hand, and that he
+either committed the murder, or knows something about it. His motive for
+annoying Miss Minford I can understand--for this city is full of just
+such well dressed scoundrels; but the motive of the murder I can't
+comprehend. But mark me--- this fellow has some knowledge of it; and we
+must hunt him up. And, first, let us compare the letters."
+
+Marcus handed the two letters to the lieutenant, who, with Overtop and
+Maltboy, gave them a close examination. One was written on faint blue
+paper in a buff envelope; the other on white paper in a white envelope.
+Every curve, cross, and dot was minutely compared; but not the faintest
+resemblance between the two letters could be discovered. "No more like
+than chalk and cheese," said the lieutenant. "My theory is knocked on
+the head."
+
+"Let me examine the envelopes again," said Overtop. They had inspected
+them less carefully than the contents.
+
+As soon as Overtop had placed the two envelopes side by side, his eyes
+lighted up with the pleasure of a great discovery. "What fools we are!"
+he exclaimed. "There it is! Don't you see? Don't you see? A regular
+Hogarthian line of beauty under the name on each."
+
+All stared at the envelopes, and at once recognized the similarity
+between the graceful curved lines. They looked somewhat like the letter
+S laid on its side; and more like the arm of a rocking chair.
+
+Marcus had a sudden inward vision of the writer. One of those
+convictions which defy all logical analysis flashed upon his mind.
+
+"Do you know where this strange young man lives, Bog?" asked Marcus.
+
+"No, sir. I follered--I should say followed--him two or three times,
+because I thought he wasn't acting just right toward Miss Minford (here
+Bog blushed). He always went into drinking houses and billiard saloons,
+and once into a place where they say the worst kind o' gambling is
+allers--I mean always--going on. But he knew me by sight, and I was
+afraid he would ask me about that letter which I didn't deliver for
+him. So I had to follow him a good piece behind; and sometimes I lost
+track of him. Then, again, he would keep a tramping round from one
+drinking place to another--but never getting drunk that I could
+see--till twelve or one o'clock at night. By that time I felt I ought to
+go home, and so I never tracked him to his lodgings, if he has any. But
+it's my belief he travels in the night, and sleeps in the daytime, like
+the cats."
+
+"Good, so far," said Marcus. "You have already given us a general
+description of this fellow's dress and appearance. Now, tell me whether
+his face is pale, his mustache small and curved up in points, his eyes
+light gray, and never looking straight at you; his nose small, thin, and
+sharp; and, now I think of it, has he not got a small scar on one of
+his cheeks?"
+
+"Why, Mr. Wilkeson," exclaimed the boy Bog, "that's the very chap!"
+
+"Who is he?" asked the lieutenant of police, "that I may have him
+arrested at once."
+
+"He is the son--"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+THE SORROW OF WHITE HAIRS.
+
+At that moment the door opened, and the venerable form of Myndert Van
+Quintem appeared before them. Marcus cast a hasty glance, importing
+silence, at his companions, and rose to receive his old friend.
+
+Mr. Van Quintem's face expressed the tenderest compassion. He clasped
+Marcus's hand, and said:
+
+"My young friend, it deeply grieves me to see you here; for I feel--I
+may say I know morally--that you are innocent of any part in
+this murder."
+
+"Thank you for your confidence," said Marcus. "I hope, when Miss Minford
+and certain other witnesses are examined to-morrow, to prove my
+innocence conclusively."
+
+"So you will, I am sure. When I say that I know you are innocent, I
+found my belief on my short but pleasant acquaintance with you. But I
+cannot guess, from the evidence at the inquest yesterday and that of
+to-day--just published in the afternoon papers,--who committed the
+murder, or what was the motive of it. Have you any clue to the mystery?"
+
+"Yes--yes," replied Marcus. "We think we have a clue; but so slight,
+that it is hardly worth mentioning. My friends here are going to
+follow it up."
+
+"And in order that we may do so without any delay," said the lieutenant,
+"please give us the name of that sneaking letter writer."
+
+Marcus coughed, looked at the lieutenant knowingly, and said, "Oh,
+_that's_ no consequence. It's a false scent. Depend on it."
+
+The old gentleman, as he entered the room, had caught Marcus Wilkeson's
+words. "He is the son--" and had observed the slight confusion with
+which Marcus had stopped saying something. He now noticed the glance
+enjoining silence, which Marcus had directed at the lieutenant
+of police.
+
+Mr. Van Quintem turned pale, as a harrowing suspicion came into his
+mind. "Mr. Wilkeson," he said, in a trembling voice, "will you answer me
+one question truly?"
+
+"I--I will," replied Marcus.
+
+"Then tell me, in Heaven's name, do you know of anything that connects
+my son with this monstrous crime? I have had a dreadful presentiment,
+all along, that he had something to do with it. The end of his wrong
+career will be the gallows. I have dreamt of it for years. O God! that I
+should have begotten such a profligate and miscreant into the world!"
+
+The old man made another pause, and then said, with a calmness that
+surprised his hearers. "Now I am ready to hear all."
+
+"And you shall," said Marcus, "though it pains me, my dear friend, to
+tell you what we know of your son. I will say, however, that there is
+no proof directly connecting him with the murder."
+
+"He is cunning and covers his tracks," said the wretched parent. "I know
+him well."
+
+Marcus then exhibited the letters. Mr. Van Quintem compared them
+carefully, but could not detect the least trace of resemblance. But, on
+examining the envelopes, at the suggestion of Fayette Overtop, he at
+once recognized the Hogarthian curve as a mark which he had always
+observed on his son's letters.
+
+"I could almost swear to this mark; and yet it is possible that he did
+not write the letters. Bad as he is, I will wait for further proofs.
+Please tell me all else that you know, Mr. Wilkeson."
+
+"With regard to the letter written to Miss Minford," said Marcus, "there
+is, unhappily, but little doubt; as this lad, who was well acquainted
+with the Minford family, can inform you."
+
+The boy Bog, very reluctantly, and with many awkward breaks, and
+swingings of his cap, repeated the history of the first letter, and
+described the young man's person most minutely, and told how he had
+followed him in his wild rambles about the town.
+
+The old man listened sadly and quietly; only now and then interrupting
+the boy's narrative with questions that were seemingly as calm as a
+judge's interrogatories.
+
+"He is a murderer. Something in the air tells me that he is," murmured
+the old man. "And he is my son."
+
+The inexpressible heart-broken sadness, with which he uttered these
+words, brought tears to the eyes of his hearers.
+
+"It may be, my dear Mr. Van Quintem, that your son did not write the
+anonymous letters to Mr. Minford, notwithstanding the point of
+resemblance which we think we have detected. While sitting, at my
+window, I have often noticed him in his room scribbling at a desk, as if
+he were practising penmanship. Perhaps, if you examine the contents of
+the desk, you may get some further light on the subject. It is
+wonderful--most people would say impossible--that a man should write
+two letters so entirely dissimilar as these."
+
+"My son always excelled in writing. It was one of the branches that he
+took prizes in at school. I will examine the desk; but I fear I shall
+only confirm my strong suspicions that he is a murderer. O God! O God!
+Why did he not die with his sainted mother! Far better would that have
+been. It is a hard thing, gentlemen--it is a very hard thing; but if
+this boy of mine does not surrender himself to the hands of justice
+to-morrow, I shall--I shall--myself denounce him to the--"
+
+The afflicted man, overcome with the terrible conflict between a sense
+of public duty, and a lingering, inextinguishable parental affection,
+fainted and fell into the arms of Marcus, who sprang to catch him.
+
+While he was still insensible, the lieutenant of police, and the boy
+Bog, slipped out of the room, and started off on a search for Myndert
+Van Quintem, jr.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+WHAT PAPER, TYPES, AND INK CAN DO.
+
+When Marcus and his counsel, accompanied by the faithful lieutenant of
+police, arrived in a close carriage at the scene of the inquest, at the
+hour of adjournment next morning, they saw a convincing illustration of
+the power of paper, types, and ink.
+
+The morning journals, with whole leaded pages of evidence, and new
+diagrams of the house and fatal room; and the enterprising illustrated
+weekly, with portraits of the deceased, the prisoner, his counsel,
+Tiffles, Patching (great hat and all), Patty Minford, the coroner, the
+foreman of the jury, a full-page design of the murder, as it was
+supposed to have taken place, representing the infuriate Wilkeson, club
+in hand, standing over the prostrate body of the inventor, from whose
+forehead the gore was pouring in torrents--all these delightful,
+provocatives of sensation had done their full and perfect work.
+
+At that moment, Marcus Wilkeson was known to the world of readers in New
+York and the whole country round about, as the murderer of
+Eliphalet Minford.
+
+On the second morning of the inquest an immense crowd of people were
+assembled in front of the house. They had been collecting since five
+A.M., when a party of six Jerseymen, having sold off their stock of
+nocturnal cabbages at Washington Market, had taken position of vantage
+before the house, from which they and their wagons were afterward
+dislodged with great effort by a squad of police. Some butcher boys,
+also returning from their night's work at market, were next on the
+ground, and selected adjacent awning posts and trees, as good points of
+observation. Mechanics and shop girls, going to their labor, recklessly
+postponed the duties of the day, and stopped to stare, awestricken, at
+the house.
+
+A knot of people in a street, is like a drift of wood in a river. It
+chokes up the stream, and catches all the other wood that is
+floating down.
+
+The police had in vain tried to clear out this human throng. They had
+waged the following contests with their fellow citizens, since six
+o'clock A.M.:--first, they had driven the Jersey market wagons to the
+street corner below; second, they had tumbled the butcher boys out of
+the trees, where they hung like a strange species of fruit; third, they
+had cleared a space of ten feet square in front of the house. Having
+done thus much, the police paused from exhaustion, and endured the jokes
+of the populace with philosophic disdain.
+
+Three policemen guarded the door, within which no one was admitted but
+the coroner, the jury, witnesses, a few political friends of the
+coroner, who exhibited passes from him, and about twenty-five reporters,
+fifteen of whom really belonged to newspapers, and the remainder had a
+general connection with the press, which could never be clearly defined
+and established. To the magic word "reporter," accompanied by the
+flourish of a pencil and a roll of paper, the three policemen smiled
+obsequiously, and unbarred the way. Seeing how well this plan worked,
+two gentlemen of inelegant leisure, and at least one pickpocket,
+provided themselves with rolls of paper and pencils, and, giving the
+password, were admitted.
+
+As the carriage rolled round the corner of the street, bringing Marcus
+in full view of these acres of men, women, and children--all waiting for
+him--the little courage which he had plucked up failed him, as
+plucked-up courage generally does. The sound of mingled laughter, jokes,
+oaths, and exclamations of impatience reached his ears.
+
+"Great heavens!" he cried; "and I am to face all these people!" If his
+features could have been seen, at that instant, by some person who
+thought himself skilled in physiognomy, he would have been
+unhesitatingly pronounced guilty of several murders. Marcus sat in the
+rear part of the coach, and he leaned back to avoid observation.
+
+As the carriage entered the outskirts of the throng, they became aware
+that it contained the man of their desires. Five small boys, who had run
+all the way from the station house, had brought the exciting
+intelligence. The vehicle was at once surrounded by clamorous people.
+
+"Say, Mister, wich is the murderer, hey?" asked a red-shirted fellow of
+Matthew Maltboy, whose corpulent figure squeezed the thin form of
+Fayette Overtop into a corner of the front seat.
+
+Maltboy was not quick at thinking; but, on this occasion, a brave
+thought came into his head before he could turn to the speaker. "I am
+the prisoner," said he.
+
+"I knowed you wos," was the red-shirted reply, "by your--ugly face."
+
+"Thank you," said Matthew, meekly.
+
+"That's the chap that killed the old man--him with the big chops," said
+the red-shirted individual to his numerous red and other shirted
+friends about.
+
+"What! that fat cuss with the pig eyes?"
+
+"Zackly!"
+
+"He's the puffick image of his portrait in the--Weekly, isn't he?"
+
+"Like as two peas."
+
+There was truth in this; for the artist who sketched the portraits, had
+inadvertently placed Marcus's name under Matthew's portrait, and
+_vice versa_.
+
+"Well," said another man, an expert in human nature, "I'd convict that
+fellow of murder any time, on the strength of his looks. Never were the
+worst passions of our nature more prominently shown than in that bad
+face." Having said which, the speaker looked about for somebody to
+contradict him, and was disappointed in finding no one.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson said: "Here, Matt, none of that generous nonsense, if
+you please. I am the prisoner, my good people." As Marcus spoke, he
+stretched forward, and exhibited his face to the gaze of the red-shirted
+querist and his companions.
+
+"No, you don't!" said that fiery leader. "This blubbery chap is the one.
+We knows him by his picter."
+
+"No use disputing them, Mark," said Maltboy, with his indomitable smile.
+
+The friendly struggle was soon terminated by their arrival at the house.
+Here the human jam was tremendous; but the police, under the direction
+of the lieutenant, succeeded in getting their convoy safe within the
+entry. The door was then closed, and five sturdy policemen stood outside
+to guard it.
+
+On entering the room, everybody and everything were found just as they
+had been the day before--a day that seemed to Marcus a month ago. The
+jury were idling over the newspapers, or lazily turning their quids. The
+coroner, who looked a little the worse for his dinner of the day before,
+was bandying jokes with the facetious reporters. The other reporters
+were sharpening their pencils and laying out their note books. Some--the
+younger ones--were listening with a species of reverence, which they
+would soon outgrow, to the official jesting of the coroner. Others were
+squabbling over the right and title to certain chairs which possessed
+the extraordinary advantage of being a foot or two nearer the coroner
+than the other chairs. This is a grave cause of dispute among the
+reporters, and has been known to give rise to a great many hard words,
+and threats of subsequent chastisements, which are always indefinitely
+postponed.
+
+The coroner nodded, and said "good morning" to the comers, and assumed a
+temporary official dignity, by taking down his right leg from the arm of
+the chair over which it gracefully depended. He also fortified himself,
+by thrusting a sizable chew into a corner of his mouth, as if he were
+carefully loading a pistol.
+
+But neither the coroner, nor the jury, nor the reporters, nor the few
+private citizens who had obtained entrance by special dispensation, and
+sat gaping about the room, attracted the attention of the prisoner.
+Before him was one in whose presence all other persons faded into
+nothingness--the fair disturber of his peaceful life--the arbitress of
+his fate--Patty Minford.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+PET AS A WITNESS.
+
+Little Pet sat on the low stool which she had always occupied, and which
+Marcus, in his strange sentimentality, had always considered sacred to
+her. She was veiled; but, through the thick gauze, he could see that her
+beautiful face was deathly pale. Her slender frame shook with little
+convulsions, that made the chair rattle.
+
+"Be calm, my dear child," said a stout, self-possessed woman who sat by
+her side, and held a bottle of salts conspicuously in her hand.
+"Remember, you have only to tell the trewth, and let the consekences
+fall where they may. Tell the trewth, as the old sayin' is, and shame
+the de--you know who."
+
+Mrs. Crull--for she it was--checked herself with a neat cough. Her
+three months' private education seemed to have been lost upon her. She
+could never speak correctly out of Miss Pillbody's sight. Fortunately,
+her heart needed no education. She had taken the poor orphan girl to her
+home, and been a mother to her. In that phrase there is an horizonless
+world of love.
+
+The deep, manly voice of Mrs. Crull carried assurance to the sinking
+heart of Patty. She took the extended hand, and pressed it, deriving
+strength from the contact of that strong, positive nature.
+
+"If you please, Mr. Cronner," said Mrs. Crull, "I think you'd better go
+ahead with her examination at once. Quickest said, soonest mended,
+you know."
+
+The prisoner and his counsel having taken their seats, the coroner
+having involuntarily thrown his right leg into the old, easy position,
+the jury having pricked up their ears, the reporters having cleared
+spaces for their elbows, the young girl proceeded to give her testimony.
+She was too nervous to make a clear, connected statement. Sometimes
+terror, sometimes tears, would choke her voice; but the cheering words
+and the smelling bottle of Mrs. Crull invariably "brought her round in
+no time," in the words of that estimable lady.
+
+Pet told the story of her return home on the fatal night, of her finding
+Mr. Wilkeson and her father in angry conversation; of her retiring to
+bed very much fatigued; of more conversation, growing angrier and
+angrier, which she overheard; of her marvellous vision in the night; of
+her waking next morning to find her vision true, and her father dead on
+the floor. All these facts, with which the reader is already familiar,
+the poor child made known to the jury in a fragmentary, roundabout way,
+as they were elicited by questions from the coroner, the jury, and
+occasionally the prisoner's counsel. The narrative of the vivid dream,
+or vision, produced a startling effect on the coroner, who was a firm
+believer in every species of supernaturalism winch is most at variance
+with human experience and reason.
+
+In his interrogatories to the witness, the coroner took the truth of the
+vision for granted. When she testified to the blows which (in her
+dream) she saw her father and the prisoner exchange, and the battered
+appearance of Mr. Wilkeson's face, the coroner looked at the prisoner,
+and was evidently disappointed to observe no traces of a bruise upon his
+pale brow or cheeks, nor the lightest discoloration about his eyes. But
+the absence of this corroboration did not, in the coroner's opinion,
+throw the least discredit on the dream.
+
+But the foreman of the jury, who had been listening with an affrighted
+look to the marvellous story, and believing it, had his faith sadly
+shaken by this discrepancy. Having been fireman ten years, and foreman
+of a hose company six years, he knew by large experience how long it
+took to tone down a black eye or reduce a puffed cheek. The foreman
+looked at the smooth, clear face of the prisoner, smiled incredulously,
+and shook his head at his associates.
+
+Fayette Overtop here acted his part with a skill worthy of a veteran.
+Instead of making a great ado over this weak point of the dream, he
+shrugged his shoulders, and smiled faintly at the jury. The jurors, who
+had been inclined, up to this time, to accept the dream as evidence,
+without question, now decided that it was nonsense.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson sat and listened, as if the scene and all the actors in
+it, himself included, were only a dream too. The young girl's evidence,
+of which he had not an inkling before, would have astounded him, if
+anything could. But he had reached that point of reaction in the
+emotions, where a stolid and complete apathy happily takes the place of
+high nervous excitement. He somehow felt certain of his acquittal, but
+was strangely benumbed to his fate.
+
+He looked at the witness--the holy idol of all his romantic and tender
+thoughts in days gone by--with unruffled composure. The marked stoicism
+of his demeanor was not lost on the reporters, and they noticed it in
+paragraphs to the effect that the prisoner exhibited a hardened
+indifference during the most thrilling portion of the evidence.
+
+QUESTION BY THE CORONER (_after thinking it over a bit_). "Who do you
+say struck the fust blow, miss? Remember, now, you're on oath."
+
+ANSWER. "My father, sir--or rather, I dreamed so."
+
+The coroner was disappointed again, for he hoped that the witness would,
+on second thought, fix the commencement of the actual assault on the
+prisoner. "Your father, being old and kind o' feeble, struck a light
+blow, I s'pose."
+
+WITNESS. "No, sir--a heavy one, I should judge; for it appeared to cut
+open Mr. Wilkeson's lip, and bruise his cheek. The blood seemed to run
+down his face in a stream." Here little Pet exhibited signs of
+faintness, which good Mrs. Crull stopped by an instant application of
+the smelling bottle.
+
+CORONER. "Mr. Wilkeson struck back a terrible blow in return, I s'pose."
+
+WITNESS. "Yes, sir. He hit my father right in the eye, raising a black
+and blue spot as large as a hen's egg." The painful recollection of this
+part of the dream so overpowered the witness, that she burst into tears,
+but was soon quieted by the motherly attentions of Mrs. Crull.
+
+FOREMAN OF THE JURY. "I don't want to hurt the young lady's feelin's,
+but this 'ere dream is all nonsense; and it strikes me we're a lot o'
+fools to be listenin' to it. Why, Harry, you know, as well as I do, that
+there wasn't no bruise on the old man's face, exceptin' the big one on
+his forehead. No more is there a sign of a scratch on the prisoner's mug
+there. It's all gammon."
+
+Three others of the jury nodded in approval of this sentiment. The
+remaining two shared somewhat in the coroner's reverence for dreams, and
+awaited further developments.
+
+The coroner turned his quid uneasily. "You can think as you please,
+Jack," said he: "but we'll see--we'll see." The coroner, like many
+other men of greater claims to wisdom, used this enigmatical expression
+when he could not see anything.
+
+A lawyer less crafty than Fayette Overtop would have protested against
+the reception of this singular testimony at the outset, and at intervals
+of a minute during its delivery. But he foresaw that, being a dream, it
+must be full of absurdities, which would surely betray themselves, and
+help his client. Besides, he was curious to hear all of the evidence,
+however ridiculous and worthless, against the prisoner.
+
+The witness then proceeded to the close of her testimony, amid the
+silence of all hearers. The narrative of the dreadful grapple, the
+struggle for the club, and the death blow given by Mr. Wilkeson to her
+prostrate father--all delivered with an intense earnestness, broken only
+by occasional sobs and pauses of anguish--produced a powerful
+impression. As she finished, and fell, half fainting, into the arms of
+Mrs. Crull, the coroner nodded his head slowly, and said:
+
+"What do you think of dreams now, Jack? Something in 'em, eh?"
+
+The foreman shared in the general feeling of awe; but he had given his
+opinion that the dream was nonsense, and stood by it. "It's strange,"
+said he. "It's what the newspapers call a 'strordinary quincidence,'
+that the young lady should 'a' dreamed out this murder so plain. I do'
+'no' much about the science o' dreams, but I think this one might be
+explained somethin' in this way: The young lady heerd the old man and
+Mr. Wilkeson here talkin' strong, when she come home that night. She
+went to sleep with their conversation ringin' in her ears. Part on it
+she heerd in her dreams, and the rest she 'magined. She says she was
+afraid there would be trouble between 'em when she went to bed. The
+fight, and the murder, and all that, which she says she saw in a dream,
+or vision like, might have grown out o' that naterally enough. That's my
+notion of it, off hand. I've often gone to bed, myself, thinkin' of
+somethin' horrible that was goin' to happen, and dreamt that it did
+happen."
+
+[Illustration: THE INQUEST. MARCUS SPRINGS TO HIS FEET.]
+
+This was precisely the theory upon which Fayette Overtop intended to
+explain the dream to the jury when the proper time arrived. He was glad
+that the foreman had done it instead; for he knew the tenacity with
+which a man, having given an opinion, defends it. To have so potent an
+advocate of his client's innocence on the jury, was a strong point.
+
+"Very good, old boy," said the coroner; "but, if the prisoner didn't
+commit the murder, who did?"
+
+This question, so manifestly unjust, and betraying the coroner's
+intention to sacrifice Marcus to a theory, roused that unfortunate man
+to consciousness, and he sprang to his feet. But the wiser Overtop
+placed his hands upon his friend's shoulder, whispered in his ear, and
+forced him reluctantly into his seat. Overtop knew that the
+argumentative foreman could best dispose of the coroner.
+
+The foreman replied to the coroner's question:
+
+"As to who did the murder, that's what we're here to find out. But, for
+one, I sha'n't bring in no man guilty till it's proved onto him."
+
+The foreman's face was a dull one, but it became suddenly luminous with
+an idea:
+
+"You say, miss, that you was waked by a noise as of somethin' heavy
+fallin' on the floor?"
+
+"Yes, sir."
+
+"You s'pose--as we all s'pose--that it was your father's body that fell,
+when he received his death blow?"
+
+"Yes, sir."
+
+"You say you heerd no one a-goin' out o' the room?"
+
+"No, sir."
+
+"That's not strange; for the murd'rer could 'a' slipped off his boots or
+shoes, and walked out puffickly quiet. I noticed, this mornin', and the
+other members of the jury can see for themselves, that the boards of the
+floor don't creak when you walk on 'em, nor the entry door neither when
+you open it. Didn't you never observe that succumstance?"
+
+"Yes, sir; but it did not occur to me when I woke up. I thought, if the
+dream had been true, that I should have heard Mr. Wilkeson moving around
+in the room, or going out of the door. I listened for a long time, as I
+have already said, and, hearing nobody, I thought the dream was nothing
+but a nightmare, as father used to call it."
+
+"One more question, miss, which may or may not be of some consekence.
+Haven't you no idee about what time it was when you was waked up by this
+noise of somethin' fallin'?"
+
+"No, sir; not the least. It might have been about midnight, I should
+guess."
+
+"Think a minute, miss, if you didn't hear any sound outside that could
+give you some idee of the time." The foreman fixed his eyes piercingly
+on the witness.
+
+She reflected a moment. "Yes--yes; I do remember, that when I jumped out
+of bed--which I did the very second that I woke up--and listened at the
+door, I heard the fire bells striking. Now, if anybody could tell what
+time that happened."
+
+"At precisely twenty-five minutes of twelve," said the foreman, in a
+solemn voice. "It was for the seventh district--the only 'larm that
+night. It was a false 'larm, and only three or four rounds was sounded.
+Did you hear the bell many times?"
+
+"Only two or three, and then it stopped. The sound was very plain, sir,
+because the bell tower is only a short distance from here, you know."
+
+"Exactly," said the foreman. "You woke up just as Uncle Ith was givin'
+off the last round."
+
+There was a deep, awestruck silence in the room; for all understood the
+object of these inquiries.
+
+"Now, gentlemen," continued the foreman, in a trembling voice, "let the
+prisoner only prove that he was a half, or a quarter, or an eighth of a
+mile from here when that 'larm was sounded, and I rather think he will
+clear himself. Where are the policemen that the prisoner saw
+that night?"
+
+A noise, as of heavy official boots, was heard on the stairs, sending a
+strange thrill through the hearts of all present.
+
+"God be praised," said Fayette Overtop, "if the lieutenant has found
+them." It was the first time that the model young lawyer had shown any
+signs of emotion.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII.
+
+THE BENEFICENCE OF FIRE BELLS.
+
+The door opened, and the tall form of the police lieutenant appeared,
+attended by two patrolmen. The patrolmen, on entering, looked directly
+at the prisoner, and seemed to recognize him. The police lieutenant
+appeared to be pleased with his success in finding the witnesses, after
+a hunt through several station houses; but he was not aware what
+importance the testimony which they could give had suddenly acquired.
+The witnesses had been searched for at the suggestion of Fayette
+Overtop, with the vague hope of making them useful in some way.
+
+The coroner scowled at the witnesses, for he feared that they would
+prove the man innocent, who, in his opinion, was the murderer. Having
+adopted this theory at the outset, and staked the whole issue upon it,
+he felt a natural reluctance to give it up.
+
+The lieutenant explained to the coroner that the two officers could
+probably throw some light on the prisoner's movements, the night of
+the murder.
+
+The coroner administered the oath to both of them, as follows:
+
+"Holeup your ri't'an'. You swear to tell truth, th'ole truth, nothin'
+but truth, s'elpyeGod. Kiss the book."
+
+The men complied with these impressive formalities, and the coroner then
+proceeded to interrogate one of them--a strapping fellow with an
+intensely Irish face.
+
+"Name?" said the coroner.
+
+"Patrick O'Dougherty, yer Honor."
+
+The phrase "Yer Honor" produced its customary gracious effect.
+
+"Do you spell O'Dougherty with a 'k,'?" asked the coroner.
+
+"Hang me if I knows!" said the O'Dougherty. "I niver spilt it. Spill it
+to suit yezself, yer Honor."
+
+"Spell it in the usual way, with a 'k'" said the coroner, turning to the
+reporters.
+
+"Your residence, Mr. O'Dougherty?"
+
+"Me what?"
+
+"Your residence. Where do you live?"
+
+"Oh! it's fare I live yer want to know. In Mulberry street, near
+Baxter."
+
+"You belong to the perlice, I believe?" asked the coroner.
+
+"It's quare ye should ax me that!" replied the O'Dougherty, with an
+enormous smile.
+
+"Because you have the perliceman's hat, club, and badge? You forget,"
+said the coroner, patronizingly, "that courts of justice doesn't know
+nothin' until it's proved to them. As a coroner, I shouldn't know my own
+grandmother, until she swore to herself."
+
+"'Tisn't that, yer Honor; but becos yer got me onto the perlice yerself.
+Don't yer 'member, on 'lection day, I smashed two ticket booths of
+t'other can'date, in the Sixth Ward, lickt as much as a dozen men who
+was workin' agen ye, an' din was put into the Tumes over night--bad luck
+to the Tumes, I say! Well, yer Honor, ye was 'lected coroner by a small
+vote; an', in turn for me services, ye got me 'p'inted--"
+
+"Ah! oh! I remember, now," said the coroner, somewhat confused. "I did
+not know you in the perliceman's dress. Well, Mr. O'Dougherty, did you
+see the prisoner on the night of the murder?"
+
+"I did, yer Honor. It was about twelve o'clock. I was sittin' on a
+bar'l in front of Pat McKibbin's store, corner of Washin'ton
+and ---- streets. I was watchin' the bar'l, yer Honor, becos Pat
+McKibbin had some of 'em stole lately, ye see."
+
+"Could yer swear to him, Mr. O'Dougherty?"
+
+"Could I shwear to me own mother?--Hivin rest her sowl! Bedad, I shud
+know him a thousan' years from now. Didn't he shtop and light his siggar
+at me poipe? And didn't his nose touch me own?"
+
+"Did he look pale and excited?" asked the coroner.
+
+"No, yer Honor; his face was red as a brick, an', though it was a cowld
+night, he looked to be warm wid fasht walkin'."
+
+"Did he say anythin'?"
+
+"No; he only axed for a light."
+
+"Was his 'pearance 'spicious?"
+
+"No, yer Honor, more'n yer own. No offince to yez."
+
+"That'll do, Mr. O'Dougherty. Next witness."
+
+"If you please, your Honor," said the smooth Overtop, rising, "you have
+accidentally omitted to ask one very important question. The prisoner
+stated, on his preliminary examination, you remember, that, when he
+stopped to light a cigar from the pipe of a policeman, he heard the
+sound of a fire bell commencing to strike. Miss Minford testifies, that
+when she was roused from sleep by the noise of her father falling to the
+floor, she heard the alarm for the Seventh District. McKibbin's store,
+at the corner of Washington and ---- streets, is more than half a mile
+from here. In view of these facts, I will, with your Honor's permission,
+ask Mr. O'Dougherty if he heard the fire alarm that night; and, if so,
+whether the prisoner was in sight at the time?"
+
+"Shure, an' I heerd it," answered the O'Dougherty. "It was fur the
+Seventh District. An' wasn't this gin'leman here at the ind o' me poipe,
+jist when it begun to bang away?"
+
+Overtop cast one triumphant glance at the jury, which was fully
+reciprocated by the foreman and four others.
+
+"I have no more questions to ask, your Honor," said Overtop.
+
+"Nor I," said the coroner, "as the witness's testimony has no great
+bearin' on the case, that I can see. What is jour name, Mister--er--"
+
+"Thomas Jelliman," responded the second policeman, a stout, bluff,
+honest-looking fellow. He did not say "Your Honor," and thereby offended
+the coroner.
+
+"Well, what's yer bizness, anyhow?" asked the coroner, curtly.
+
+"I should think you would remember that I was a policeman," said the
+witness, looking the coroner straight in the eye.
+
+The coroner, taking a second observation of the witness, recalled him as
+the identical officer who had arrested him, one Christmas night, for
+drunkenness, and locked him up in the station house. This little
+occurrence was before his election to the dignified and responsible
+office of County Coroner.
+
+"If you don't remember me," said the witness, "I think I could bring
+myself to your mind easy. On a certain Christmas night, not many
+years ago--"
+
+"Never mind the particulars, Mr. Jelliman," observed the coroner. "Come
+to look at yer, I recolleck yer very well. Ahem! What do you know about
+this 'ere case, Mr. Jelliman?"
+
+"Nothing, sir, except that I can swear to having seen the prisoner, on
+the night of the murder, at the corner of West and ---- streets. He was
+smoking a cigar, and walking fast. As he passed me, he said, 'A cold
+night, Mr. Policeman.' This made me notice him particularly, because it
+isn't very often that people throw away civilities on us. Just as he
+turned the corner below me, the alarm bells struck the last round for
+the Seventh District. They had struck three or four rounds. That is all
+I know about the affair."
+
+"I have no other questions to ask, Mr. Jelliman," said the coroner, with
+great politeness.
+
+The coroner was baffled. He had staked the whole case upon the theory of
+Marcus Wilkeson's guilt, and had made no attempt to procure other
+testimony than what would prove that supposition. He scratched his head
+and rolled his quid in a perfect quandary.
+
+Another noise was heard on the stairs, as of several persons hurriedly
+ascending.
+
+Then the door opened, and an excited group made its appearance. In
+advance was a slender young man, whose face was pale with debauchery.
+His clothes were rich, and had an unpleasantly new look. As he stepped
+over the threshold, he glanced coolly about the room, and, his eyes
+resting on the coroner, smiled.
+
+"Ah, Myndert, my boy," said the coroner, "what are you here for?"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX.
+
+AN OLD MAN'S OFFERING.
+
+"Hang me if I know, Harry! It's the old man's work. He'll explain it to
+you."
+
+Behind this easy young man came a strong policeman, who, immediately
+upon his entrance, received a nod of approbation from the lieutenant.
+Behind the policeman walked, with bended white head and tottering limbs,
+the venerable Mr. Van Quintem. The old gentleman was partly supported,
+in his infirmity, by the boy Bog. It was a touching sight to see the
+confiding trust with which the weakness of sixty-eight clung to the
+strong arm of nineteen. Bog hung down his head modestly, and blushed. He
+was not seen even to look at the little veiled figure which sat in the
+middle of the room. But young Myndert Van Quintem looked at it, and
+bowed with the deepest respect. The bow was answered by a faint nod and
+a delicate blush. Mrs. Crull observed the interchange of recognitions,
+and frowned to herself.
+
+"Mr. Coroner," said the old gentleman, straightening himself, and coming
+forward with a quick step, as one who was about to perform an unpleasant
+task, and would hurry through it, "this young man is my son. God knows
+what love I have lavished upon him from the day that he was born, and
+with what ingratitude he has repaid me. But--but that is neither here
+nor there. I have come here to deliver him up to you as a prisoner--"
+
+"As a prisoner!" echoed the coroner; and he and all looked amazed at
+this strange announcement.
+
+"Why should it surprise you? It is a simple act of justice. I have
+reason to think that my son knows something about this murder" (here the
+old gentleman's voice faltered); "and my duty, as a good citizen and an
+honest man, requires me to surrender him. There are other affairs of a
+private nature between myself and my son--he knows to what I refer
+--which I am not prepared to make public at the present time." The old
+gentleman looked significantly at his son, who smiled calmly at him
+in return.
+
+A chair was brought for Mr. Van Quintem, sen., and he sank into it. The
+young man seated himself in another chair which was handed to him by the
+attentive coroner himself.
+
+"Now, Myndert, my good fellow," said the coroner, "if yer knows anything
+about this affair, fire away."
+
+"Will the coroner be good enough to swear the witness?" asked Fayette
+Overtop.
+
+"Oh! I'd quite forgot it." And the coroner mumbled his irreverent
+jargon.
+
+"Two minutes are enough to tell you all I know, Harry," said the young
+man, in a sweet, effeminate voice. "I happened to save Miss Minford's
+life, a few months ago--she will give you the particulars, no doubt, if
+you desire them--and that is the way I made her acquaintance." (Here
+another respectful bow to the young lady.) "Since then, I have met her,
+quite accidentally, a few times, and--I do not pretend to conceal
+it--have gradually come to feel an interest--a brotherly interest, I may
+call it--in her." (The coroner smiled.) "Having learned from her that
+she was receiving her education at the expense of Mr. Wilkeson, and that
+that gentleman was a constant visitor at her father's house I thought
+it proper, as a sincere and disinterested friend of the young lady, to
+make some inquiries into his character. Judging, from the result of
+these inquiries, that his designs were not honorable toward Miss
+Minford--Mr. Wilkeson will pardon the expression, but I am under oath,
+and must tell the truth as to my motives--I took the liberty of writing
+a note to Mr. Minford, merely cautioning him against Mr. Wilkeson. I did
+not sign my name to the note, because I was not personally acquainted
+with Mr. Minford--in fact, never saw him in my life--and did not wish to
+assume the responsibility, disagreeable to every sensitive person, of
+interfering in another man's family affairs. The object of the note was
+to make Mr. Minford cautious. I presume no one will undertake to say
+that a father can be too cautious concerning the honor of a young and
+lovely daughter." (Another respectful glance at Miss Minford.) "I am
+aware anonymous letters are a little irregular, in the opinions of most
+people. But, when sent with a good motive, I really don't see the
+harm in them."
+
+"Nor I neither," said the coroner. "It strikes me they're correct enough
+when the motive's a good 'un."
+
+"But, your Honor, when an anonymous letter is full of lies and slanders,
+I respectfully submit that it is a piece of cowardly malice, which the
+law ought to punish with the utmost severity." Fayette Overtop spoke
+with tranquillity and firmness, looking young Van Quintem directly in
+the eye, and making him quail.
+
+The judicious phrase, "Your Honor," alone saved Overtop from an
+explosion of official wrath. "The Court can't allow these interruptions,
+Mr. Overtop," said the coroner. "Her dignity must be maintained. As for
+'nonymous letters, whether it's right or wrong to send them, people will
+differ. The coroner and the jury is competent to judge for themselves.
+Go ahead, Myndert."
+
+"As the first letter seemed to have no effect, I sent another,
+suggesting that Mr. Minford should inquire into Mr. Wilkeson's history
+in the little village of----, Westchester County, where he was born,
+and lived many years. I learned from Miss Minford that her father
+visited Westchester County one day, and presume that he made some
+important discoveries there; for Miss Minford told me, that, on his
+return, he had forbidden Mr. Wilkeson to come to the house. If there was
+any harm in putting Mr. Minford on the track to find out the real truth
+about the man who was a constant attendant at his fireside, I do not
+see it."
+
+"Nor I neither," said the coroner. "The end, as the sayin' is, justifies
+the means."
+
+"If your Honor pleases," said the facile Overtop, "we could easily prove
+that all the reports which Mr. Minford gathered in Westchester County,
+prejudicial to my client, arose from a confounding of another person
+with him. But, as this explanation would involve the disclosure of
+private family affairs, and also the reflection of disgrace on the
+memory of the dead, my client prohibits me from saying more on the
+subject. But all this, as none knows better than your Honor, has nothing
+to do with the case. We ask that my client shall either be proved guilty
+of the murder, or of some knowledge of it, or released."
+
+Fayette Overtop here looked volumes of confidence at the jury; and five
+of the jury looked back volumes of agreement with him.
+
+"Nobody can be in a bigger hurry than me, Mr. Overtop," said the
+coroner, with tolerable good nature. "These 'ere inquests, commencin' in
+the mornin' and holdin' on a good part of the day, are rather hard on a
+chap 'customed to his 'leven-o'clock drink. I have to make up for the
+loss by adjournin' early in the arternoon. Ha! ha! Now, Myndert, my boy,
+rush her through. You don't know anythin' about the murder, I s'pose.
+You were somewhere else on the fatal night, of course--and I can guess
+where. At Brown's, eh?"
+
+Brown's was a notorious gambling house on Broadway.
+
+"Exactly, Harry. I was at Brown's from nine P.M. to four o'clock the
+following morning. And, if I mistake not, there is a gentleman in this
+room who can swear to having seen me there, say from ten to eleven."
+Saying this, young Van Quintem winked hard at the coroner.
+
+"You needn't mince matters," said the coroner. "I was at Brown's that
+night, and between the hours you name. Being a public officer, I
+sometimes look into Brown's, and a good many other places, too, to see
+that nothin' a'n't a-goin' on wrong. Ha! I partickly 'member it, because
+I accidentally lost about fifty dollars there that night. Ha! ha!"
+
+"I think I recollect the little circumstance," said the witness, with a
+smile.
+
+"Very likely. Ha! Now, Myndert, of course we all understand that you are
+innocent; but, to satisfy the public, I guess I'd better summon a few
+witnesses from Brown's, to prove you were there all night."
+
+"I thought of that, Harry, and requested a number of my friends at
+Brown's to drop around here, and prove an _alibi_ for me. They were very
+much engaged at the time, or they would have come with me."
+
+"They were playing faro," said the old gentleman, "and my son was
+gambling with them. Wretched young man, how often have I cautioned you
+against that vice!"
+
+"The cautioning I don't object to," said the son; "but I consider it
+unfair to drag a fellow away from a streak of good luck. I was raking in
+the piles just as you and the policeman, and that mop-headed youth
+behind you" (he alluded to the boy Bog) "came down on me. Ah! I see the
+game is finished, and here they are."
+
+Four men, of a highly correct appearance, dressed in quiet good taste,
+who would have passed in the Broadway muster for merchants of the
+severest practical variety, entered the room.
+
+They nodded in the most gentlemanly manner to the coroner, and gave a
+friendly recognition to young Myndert.
+
+"You may be willing to believe these polished scoundrels under oath;
+but hang me if I would!" said the old gentleman, with emphasis.
+
+The four gamblers showed their even rows of white teeth pleasantly, and
+one of them replied:
+
+"You are an elderly gentleman, Mr. Van Quintem, and the father of our
+young friend; and, of course, you are permitted to abuse us as much as
+you like."
+
+"It seems to me, Mr. Van Quintem," said the coroner, "that you are
+rather hard on these gen'lemen, who, so fur as I know 'em, is of the
+highest respectability. Don't yer want to have yer son prove
+an _alibi?_"
+
+"I want to have him prove the truth, and that's all. And for that reason
+I wouldn't credit such evidence as these men will give."
+
+"You would like to have me hanged, my dear father," said the son,
+mildly; "but I don't think you will be gratified in that amiable little
+desire. Eh, Harry?"
+
+The coroner grinned, shifted his quid, put on his most serious official
+look, and said:
+
+"No more of this 'ere jokin', if you please, gen'lemen. A inquest isn't
+zactly the place for fun."
+
+He then proceeded to swear and interrogate the four new witnesses. They
+took the oath decorously, kissing the book in the politest, most
+gentlemanly manner. Their testimony was to the effect that young Van
+Quintem passed the night of the murder, from ten P.M. till four A.M., at
+Brown's, and was not absent one minute. They were able to corroborate
+the fact, by a reference to pocket memorandum books, in which entries
+such as "Van Q., debit $50," or "Van Q., credit $100," appeared at
+intervals. As to the general character of the house, upon which several
+members of the jury asked questions, they testified that it was a
+species of club house, where a few gentlemen of excellent reputation
+occasionally met for the purposes of innocent social intercourse. Games
+of chance were sometimes played at Brown's, to while away an hour; and
+betting was now and then done, in a strictly honorable and legitimate
+way. Several of the jurymen would have improved the occasion, to learn
+all about the internal management of Brown's; but the coroner decided
+that such questions were entirely "relevant" (meaning irrelevant), and
+suggested that, as there were no more witnesses, the case might as well
+go to the jury. The coroner had just consulted his watch, and found that
+it was four o'clock. He was aware, from the turn things had taken, that
+he had lost the verdict which he hoped to obtain; but that was no reason
+why he should lose his dinner. The coroner was not a man of energy; and,
+being foiled in his efforts to convict Marcus Wilkeson, he had no
+disposition to pursue the matter further. Besides, he had already
+achieved a large measure of profitable notoriety from the case; for he
+had been ridiculed and abused in most of the city papers; and _that_
+insured him, beyond all doubt, the nomination for and election to the
+State Senate, for which he was an aspirant at the next fall campaign.
+Under all these circumstances, the coroner was satisfied.
+
+The jurors, receiving but a shilling a day, and being hungry and tired,
+were quite willing to wind up the case. After putting their heads
+together, whispering and nodding about five minutes, the foreman
+declared the following as their verdict:
+
+"That the deceased, Eliphalet Minford, came to his death, on the night
+of the ---- day of April, 185-, from a wound inflicted on the head by a
+club in the hands of some person unknown to the jurors."
+
+Overtop and Maltboy took the verdict as a matter of course, having
+anticipated it for some time. Marcus Wilkeson, who had been in a gloomy
+stupor for the past hour, and had expected the worst, looked up in
+surprise at this lucky dispensation of Fate. Tears sprang to his eyes,
+and he extended a hand to each of his faithful friends, by whom he was
+warmly congratulated on the happy issue of the affair. The jurors also
+came forward with their congratulations. Even the coroner said, "Well,
+Mr. Wilkeson, I did my pootiest to hold you, because I thought you was
+the murderer; but the jury doesn't indorse my 'pinion, and I gives in."
+Mrs. Crull, who had been watching Marcus narrowly, and was firmly
+impressed with the conviction of his innocence, came forward with a warm
+hand, and tried to think of a proverb suitable to the occasion, but
+could not. Patty Minford removed the veil from her face, and looked at
+her benefactor. She made a motion as if to rise and go toward him. Then
+an expression of doubt stole over her features; and Marcus, who observed
+her at that moment, knew that the vision of the night was still before
+her, and that she could not hold him guiltless though a dozen juries had
+released him. This thought touched Marcus with sadness, which all the
+congratulations of his friends could not disperse.
+
+A faint cry was heard. Old Mr. Van Quintem had fallen from his chair,
+and would have dropped upon the floor, but for the strong arm of the boy
+Bog. He was in the act of rising from his seat for the purpose of
+offering his hand to Marcus, when the vertigo, from which he was an
+occasional sufferer, seized him.
+
+"Poor old gentleman!" said Marcus, forgetful of all else, and rushing to
+the side of his venerable friend. Directing that the windows be opened,
+Marcus, aided by the boy Bog, bore the senseless form to the fresh, cool
+air. The grateful breeze, and a cup of cold water applied to his brow,
+soon restored the wretched father to a beginning of consciousness.
+
+As he lay there, more dead than alive, in the arms of his two friends,
+the ingrate son, having lighted a cigar, looked coldly over the
+shoulders of the bystanders at the senseless figure of his father, and
+said, in the sweetest voice:
+
+"Poor old fellow! He has only himself to blame for kicking up all this
+row. I told him it would be too much for his nerves; but he would insist
+on dragging me up here. I forgive him from the bottom of my heart."
+
+The bystanders looked on in amazement at this speech.
+
+The son continued: "I'm glad to see that he is in good hands. Upon my
+word, nothing would give me greater pleasure than to help a little; but
+I fear that, when the old man came out of it, and saw me over him, he
+would go off again. So I guess I had better leave."
+
+And young Van Quintem sauntered cheerfully out of the room, in company
+with his four friends from Brown's. The coroner had been waiting at the
+foot of the stairs for them; and the party adjourned to the nearest
+drinking saloon, when the coroner, overjoyed at having got rid of a
+tedious and embarrassing case, stood treat for one round.
+
+But who killed the inventor?
+
+The papers and the police, after groping for weeks in search of the
+answer, turned it over to the solution of Time, with the comforting
+assurance that MURDER WILL OUT.
+
+
+
+BOOK TENTH.
+
+DONE ON BOTH SIDES.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+A FISHER OF MEN.
+
+Mr. Augustus Whedell was a gentleman who had been living handsomely for
+three years on his wits.
+
+There was nothing remarkable in Mr. Whedell's personal appearance, with
+the exception of his wig. It was his fond belief that this wig looked
+like natural hair; but everybody knew it was a wig across the street. He
+also wore a gold double eyeglass, which he handled as effectively as a
+senorita her fan. Most of his loans, credits, and extensions, had been
+obtained by the dexterous manipulation of that eyeglass.
+
+Mr. Whedell twirled the dangerous instrument, and opened and shut it
+with more than his usual grace, one evening toward the middle of April.
+He was about to broach a disagreeable subject to his daughter, who,
+blooming, and exquisitely dressed, sat by the fire and yawned.
+
+"My dear Clementina, you are now twenty years old, and ought to be
+married. Delays are dangerous. What do you think of Chiffield?"
+
+Mr. Whedell spoke bluntly, and to the point, because he was addressing
+his own daughter, and also because short speeches suited his
+natural languor.
+
+"He's a horrid dancer!" said that young lady.
+
+"Granted. But when he does dance, he jingles money in his pocket."
+
+"He's a perfect fright, pa. You won't deny that?"
+
+"I won't deny that he is a plain, substantial gentleman. He has immense
+feet, and he is a little bald. What of that?"
+
+"Oh! nothing," replied Clementina, in a tone that signified
+"Everything."
+
+Her father caught the irony of the remark, and said:
+
+"My dear child, I know the natural leaning of your sex to handsome men.
+You are like your mother there. But remember, they never have any
+money--as a general rule. I won't undertake to explain the curious fact.
+But fact it is, you will admit that."
+
+"Very likely. But I hate this old Chiffield."
+
+Mr. Whedell smiled, twirled his double eyeglass a few dozen times round
+his forefinger, and said:
+
+"My darling daughter, listen, and you will appreciate the advantages of
+this match."
+
+Clementina frowned, and bit her finger nails.
+
+"My child," continued the fond parent, "I have always concealed my
+troubles from you. They can no longer be kept a secret. This house is
+not mine. Most of this furniture is unpaid for. The last month's bills
+at the butcher's, baker's, and grocer's are still due. I have exhausted
+my credit, and don't know where to raise a dollar. That is my
+'situation,' as the newspapers say."
+
+Clementina turned pale with amazement, and could not say a word.
+
+"You are willing to hear me? I will explain further. Three years ago, my
+old friend Mr. Abernuckle failed. He owned this house, and, wishing to
+save it from his creditors, he had previously made a sham sale of it to
+me. I have occupied it free of rent. On the strength of this house, I
+got credit for furniture, for clothes, for our bread and meat. On the
+strength of this house, I have borrowed money enough to keep my
+principal creditors at bay. On the strength of this house, we occupy
+to-day a very fair position in society. On the strength of this house, I
+propose to marry you."
+
+His daughter still looked on with open mouth, like one stupefied.
+
+"But, to do this, no time must be lost. My friend Abernuckle has at last
+settled with his creditors at fifteen per cent., and wants possession of
+the house on the 1st of May. On that day this will be our home
+no longer."
+
+There was a fearless pull at the door bell. "It is a creditor," said Mr.
+Whedell. "I will face him."
+
+Mr. Whedell went to the door, and returned in a few moments. "It was the
+butcher," said he. "He had called twice to-day, and, not finding me in,
+takes this unusual hour to ask for a settlement. The old excuses would
+not do. What do you suppose I told him this time?"
+
+"I can't imagine. Something dreadful, I suppose," was the shuddering
+reply.
+
+"The man had to be got rid of. We must have meat. I was at my wits' end.
+So I took the liberty of telling him, confidentially, that my daughter
+would marry a wealthy merchant in a few days, and asked him, as a favor,
+to let the bill run on to the 1st of May. On that day he should
+positively be paid. The man grumbled at first, but finally said he would
+give me one more trial, and then went away. Neatly arranged, wasn't
+it, my dear?"
+
+Mr. Whedell would have been delighted with one word of approval (even a
+qualified one) from his daughter, but she would not, or could not
+speak it.
+
+"You listen attentively, my darling. I am glad to see it. This plan
+worked so well with the butcher, that I shall try it on with the
+upholsterer, the baker, the grocer, the tailor, and the rest of my long
+list of creditors. I shall stake all on the 1st of May. To save us from
+a grand explosion, and to obtain a roof for your head and mine on the
+1st of May, you must marry immediately."
+
+Miss Clementina Whedell, like many other people, had an unsuspected
+strength of character which only a great occasion could call out. "It is
+perfectly atrocious," said she, at length, "and I am making a grave
+sacrifice of my happiness; but I suppose I must do it. Are you sure this
+Chiffield is rich?"
+
+"Now, you are my own dear daughter!" said Mr. Whedell, tossing his
+double eyeglass up and catching it, as was his custom when exulting.
+"Your question is a prudent one, and worthy of you. I am happy to inform
+you that Chiffield is worth one hundred and fifty thousand dollars."
+
+Clementina smiled faintly, though she tried to look like a martyr.
+
+"I learn this from the tax rolls. When Chiffield first began to call
+here, and showed a profound interest in my conversation, I knew that he
+was after you, and I thought it best to look into his resources. The tax
+rolls, which are the best possible evidence, show that he has ten lots
+in Harlem, with a cottage tenement on each of them, and several acres
+now rented to German gardeners in the Twelfth Ward. These are rated in a
+lump at seventy-five thousand dollars, which is a low estimate. So much
+for the real estate. Now the personal property of Upjack, Chiffield &
+Co. is valued on the same tax rolls (which always understate it) at
+three hundred thousand dollars. Suppose Chiffield to own a one-fourth
+interest only, and there you have the item of seventy-five thousand
+dollars more. Grand total, one hundred and fifty thousand dollars. A
+nearer figure would probably be two hundred thousand dollars; but I will
+not build castles in the air for you. Chiffield is only forty--which is,
+in fact, young. He is healthy and energetic. The firm are making money.
+He will yet be a millionnaire. Confess, now, that I have chosen
+wisely for you."
+
+Here another decisive pull at the door bell. Mr. Whedell answered it in
+person. Returning, he merely said, giving his double eyeglass a fillip,
+"The furniture man. Have fixed him for the 1st of May. So far, the plan
+works well."
+
+"But are you sure, pa," asked the discreet Clementina, "that Mr.
+Chiffield will offer himself?"
+
+"Positive; because he has always been so very attentive to me. When men
+flatter, and study the hobbies of the father, they are after the
+daughter in earnest. Mr. Chiffield's very figure--the cut of his jib, so
+to speak--is that of a marrying man. Only you must give him some little
+encouragement. Not keep him at a distance, as you have hitherto done."
+
+"But he may not be anxious to marry before the 1st of May. Then what?"
+
+"Poor thing! how little you understand mankind! He will marry you at
+twenty-four hours' notice, if you will let him. All men are alike
+impatient and unreasonable in such matters. It is the women who hold
+back--after they are safely engaged."
+
+"La, pa! how knowingly you talk!"
+
+"I flatter myself I know something of the human species," returned Mr.
+Whedell. "Ah! another ring. Too faint for a creditor. Mr.
+Chiffield, perhaps."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+PLAYING WITH THE LINE.
+
+The conjecture was correct. But with Mr. Chiffield came Matthew Maltboy.
+They had arrived on the door steps at the same moment, coming from
+different directions.
+
+Mr. Whedell received Chiffield with his heartiest grip, and inflicted
+only a mild squeeze on the hand of Maltboy, whose appearance at that
+time he considered decidedly unfortunate. The father thought he had
+observed in Clementina signs of preference for that corpulent young
+lawyer. He was pained to see that Clementina barely extended the tips of
+her fingers to Chiffield, while to Maltboy she gave her whole palm with
+great cordiality. Not only this, but she encouraged Maltboy to take a
+seat by her, and commenced talking with him of the opera, of balls, of
+new music, of fashions, of the last novel, rattling away on these
+subjects as if her whole soul were wrapped up in the discussion. It was
+almost a monologue. Maltboy's part consisted of "Yes;" "I think so too;"
+"We agree perfectly," and adjectives of admiration occasionally thrown
+in. That musical voice! He could have listened with rapture to its
+recital of the multiplication table.
+
+Mr. Chiffield and Mr. Whedell had settled themselves on a _tete-a-tete_,
+and, after some cursory observations on the weather, commenced talking
+of finance--a theme of which neither of those gentlemen ever tired.
+
+"So money is getting tighter?" said Mr. Whedell, after a pause to digest
+the awful truth which Mr. Chiffield had imparted to him. "Now I
+shouldn't be surprised, sir, to hear of failures before long, and in
+quarters where the public least expect them."
+
+If Mr. Whedell's double eyeglass had been astride his nose instead of
+swinging in his fingers, he might have noticed a faint paleness blending
+with the deep yellow of Mr. Chiffield's complexion. That gentleman
+replied, a little more quickly than was his wont:
+
+"A few small, weak houses may go down, perhaps, but the strong ones will
+weather the storm easy enough. If our establishment could live through
+1847, it is in no danger now."
+
+"And such was the good fortune of Upjack, Chiffield & Co., I well
+remember," said Mr. Whedell.
+
+Mr. Chiffield bowed his gracious acknowledgment of the handsome
+historical allusion.
+
+"How is Erie, Mr. Chiffield?"
+
+"Looking up."
+
+"Sure of it?"
+
+"A leading Wall-street man told me, this afternoon, it would advance
+three per cent. this week. I have a slight interest in watching it,"
+said Mr. Chiffield, smiling.
+
+"So have I," said Mr. Whedell, smiling also.
+
+Daring their conversation, and the remainder of their financial
+dialogue, Mr. Whedell kept one ear, and occasionally one eye, inclined
+toward his daughter and the favored Maltboy. If there was a hint
+conveyed in those side glances at his daughter, she either did not
+notice it, or did not choose to take it. Sometimes Mr. Chiffield looked
+in the same direction, but casually, as it were, and without one sign of
+impatience visible in the depths of his calm brown eyes. Mr. Chiffield
+was not a nervous man.
+
+Matthew Maltboy was so perfectly free from selfishness at this moment,
+that he would cheerfully have spared a few words from Miss Whedell's
+delightful monologue for the gratification of his late rival ("late" was
+now decidedly the word, in Maltboy's opinion) over the way. In the
+exercise of his large charity and compassion, he pitied that
+unfortunate, sadly disappointed dealer in dry goods.
+
+This pity, as Matthew used to say in after days, was thrown away. At the
+end of a brilliant description of a new set of quadrilles which Miss
+Whedell had danced at a sociable the night before, that young lady said,
+"Excuse me," and crossed the room to a what-not in the corner, and
+searched for something among a pile of magazines and pictures. The
+thought that she was making efforts to please him, tickled Matthew's
+vanity. While she was overhauling the pile, Mr. Whedell left his seat by
+Chiffield, and took the one just vacated by his daughter. Matthew
+received him with the diplomatic courtesy due to the parent of one's
+enchantress, and made a well-meant if not novel remark on the state of
+the weather. Mr. Whedell mildly disputed his proposition (whatever it
+was)--for Mr. W. was always disputatious on that subject--and then
+passed to the consideration of national politics. "The one topic
+natually suggests the other," said Mr. Whedell, "for they are equally
+variable." This was one of the father's few standard jokes; and Maltboy
+always laughed at it with the heartiness of a future son-in-law. They
+then grappled with the great theme in earnest.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+PULLING IN.
+
+Clementina, having found what she sought, glided to the chair which her
+father had relinquished, and said, coquettishly, "Now I have come to
+entertain _you_, Mr. Chiffield. You were speaking of Niagara Falls, the
+other day. Here are some photographs of them, taken for me on the spot."
+She handed the pictures to Mr. Chiffield. That gentleman took them with
+a profound bow, glanced over them, and said, "How elegant!" "What rich
+scenery!" "How tasty they are got up, a'n't they?" "This is the showiest
+picture;" "Here's a neat one," &c., &c., &c. Mr. Chiffield had
+contracted the use of a certain class of highly descriptive adjectives
+in selling dry goods. Clementina watched him narrowly, and thought how
+nicely she could manage this heavy fellow.
+
+"How many times have you been to the Falls?" she asked, when Chiffield
+had shuffled through the photographs twice.
+
+"Three times," said Chiffield, telling a white lie; for he had seen them
+at morning, noon, and evening on the same day. "And how often have you
+visited them, Miss Whedell?"
+
+"Oh! so often I can't remember. My last visit was early last autumn. Oh!
+pa, did we go to Niagara Falls before or after our trip to the White
+Mountains?"
+
+"After it, my child," replied the father, who maintained a cocked ear
+toward his child. "Don't you recollect we went from the Falls to Lake
+George, and stayed there till the first week in November? That was the
+year we omitted Newport and Saratoga, for a wonder," he added, conveying
+the idea, in a look to Mr. Chiffield, that such an omission was a marvel
+in their annual experiences.
+
+"You love the Falls, I suppose?" said Mr. Chiffield.
+
+"Oh! not much. I think they're dreadfully overrated." Clementina was
+determined not to be won too cheaply.
+
+"So I think," said Chiffield, delighted to speak his real sentiments
+this time; "though everybody is obliged to praise 'em, because that's
+the fashion."
+
+"But, though the Falls a'n't much, I must say the balls and hops are
+delightful. The fresh air there seems to give one strength to dance all
+night without a bit of fatigue. I bought these pictures because they
+show the hotels and other places where I have had such delicious
+dances."
+
+Chiffield execrated dancing, because he had large feet, and legs
+slightly bowed. He moved in the cotillon or waltz with a certain
+elephantine ponderousness and sagacity. Therefore she tantalized him
+with these reminiscences.
+
+"You see the Clifton House, there, on the Canada side? One night I
+danced eight waltzes, six polkas, four quadrilles, three fancy dances,
+and wound up, at five o'clock, with the German."
+
+"Wonderful!" observed Chiffield, not knowing what else to say.
+
+"Perhaps you think I was tired? Oh! not a particle. Next night we had a
+little hop on Table Rock. It was got up on short notice, but perfectly
+charming, I assure you. There were only two fiddles, and sometimes the
+noise of the Falls would almost drown the music. The fiddlers had to
+scrape so hard, that they gave out about three o'clock, and we had to
+give up the dancing, and go home, very much disappointed."
+
+"Unlucky, indeed!" interjected Chiffield.
+
+"But the next night we had two extra fiddlers. They relieved the other
+two at midnight, and then we danced till daybreak. Oh! such a glorious
+time. Next year, when I heard that a part of Table Rock had tumbled into
+the horrid river, I could have cried."
+
+"It was a great shame, indeed!" said Chiffield.
+
+"Isn't this view of Suspension Bridge natural?" she asked
+
+"Amazing!" said Chiffield; and he ventured to add that he considered
+that bridge to be a great triumph of human genius.
+
+"I dare say it is. But I didn't think of that. I was only going to tell
+you how the gentlemen of our Table Rock party tried to hire the use of
+the bridge one night to dance on. The owners wouldn't let it. Mean,
+weren't they?"
+
+"Contemptible!" replied Chiffield.
+
+"We should have had it nicely swept and lighted. The breeze coming down
+the river would have been beautiful, and the awful noise of the Falls
+wouldn't have been too loud for the music. But we almost made up for our
+disappointment. Next night, the gentlemen hired the 'Maid of the
+Mist'--the little steamboat, you know, that you see in this picture--and
+we sailed round and round below the Falls all night, dancing all the
+time. We went so near the Falls twice, that I got quite wet with the
+nasty spray, and caught cold; but that didn't prevent me from dancing
+all the next night, at the International. You have a good view of the
+house in this picture."
+
+"Tasty," said Chiffield.
+
+Mr. Whedell and Maltboy had not lost a word of this conversation, though
+they had been mutually boring each other with complex sentences about
+national politics. Happily, the discussion required no mental effort,
+and left them both free to hear and make mental comments on the dialogue
+that buzzed across the way.
+
+Mr. Whedell regretted that his daughter should expatiate with such
+vivacity upon a subject that must be extremely disagreeable to a
+gentleman of Mr. Chiffield's large figure and steady habits. To the
+cultivated judgment of Maltboy, it was evident that the young lady was
+trying to amuse Chiffield merely for the purpose of annoying him
+(Maltboy). Experience had taught Matthew the best kind of cure for this
+species of female perversity. He determined to leave the house, and
+thereby show that he was not to be trifled with.
+
+Availing himself of a pause in the dissertations on national politics,
+Maltboy pulled out his watch and consulted it. "Why!" said he; "nine
+o'clock! And I was to be in Fourteenth street by half past eight. Only
+intended to drop in just to see how you were. You really must excuse me,
+Mr. Whedell." Matthew rose as he spoke, to show that his mind was made
+up, and remonstrances would be useless.
+
+"Don't go. Put off your other call," ejaculated Mr. "Whedell, at the
+same time rising, and thereby indicating a perfect acquiescence in the
+departure of his guest.
+
+"You are in a hurry," said Miss Whedell, calmly, but without objection
+in voice or eye.
+
+Mr. Chiffield looked calmly at his rival; and none but a skilled student
+of physiognomy could have discovered a gleam of triumph in his dull,
+yellow face.
+
+Maltboy was disappointed in the calm demeanor of Miss Whedell; but,
+strong in his purpose, he walked toward the door, followed by the
+father. As he passed into the entry, he bowed coldly to the lady of his
+heart, and drew from her a scarcely perceptible nod.
+
+At this moment, a valuable thought occurred to the paternal Whedell.
+
+"My dear Maltboy," said he, closing the parlor door, "excuse the
+abruptness of the question; but could you lend me a couple of hundred?"
+
+The question was indeed abrupt, but not altogether unexpected. Mr. Quigg
+had apprised Maltboy of Mr. Whedell's financial weakness; but the
+infatuation of the ardent young bachelor had led him to disregard that
+warning. He was fully prepared to say, "Yes, with pleasure," and he
+did say so.
+
+"Thank you," said the gratified parent. "Only want it a few days." Mr.
+Whedell was too great an adept in the art of borrowing, to waste words
+of tedious explanation and gratitude, which only produce an impression
+that the borrower does not mean to pay. He accepted Maltboy's reply as a
+matter of course.
+
+"If not too much trouble, could you give me a check to-night?" asked
+Mr. Whedell. "Have a payment to make before bank hours to-morrow."
+
+"Most readily, my dear sir," replied the amiable Matthew. "Have you pen
+and paper convenient?"
+
+"In this room, Mr. Maltboy," said his host, ushering him into a little
+apartment at the end of the entry, which contained a few books, and was
+passed off upon a credulous world as Mr. Whedell's library. The gas was
+lighted, writing materials were produced, and, in less than three
+minutes, Matthew Maltboy had put his name at the bottom of a check on
+the ---- Bank, for two hundred dollars. He did so smiling, and with a
+full consciousness that he had sustained a dead loss to that extent. But
+he was always too good-natured to deny a friend; and, in this particular
+case, he felt that he was buying a perpetual free admission to the
+house, and a usufructuary interest in the fascinations of Clementina.
+The idea of marriage with that young lady had never occurred to him. He
+never troubled himself with problems of the future.
+
+"All right," said Mr. Whedell, folding up the check carelessly, and
+putting it in his pocket. "Shall I give you my note?"
+
+"Oh, no!" said the willing victim, blandly. "Hand it me any time, at
+your convenience."
+
+"Can return it within a week," responded Mr. Whedell; "but, on some
+accounts, the 1st of May will suit me best, if perfectly agreeable
+to you."
+
+"As you please."
+
+"We will call it the 1st of May, then. I regret you are in a hurry, sir.
+But remember, we are always happy to see you here."
+
+With this pleasant remark ringing in his ears, and fully compensating
+him for the loss of his two hundred dollars, Maltboy hastened home, but
+did not tell his friends of his adventure; but he smoked and mused over
+it agreeably, and was totally unmindful of the truth announced by Mr.
+Quigg on New Year's day, when speaking of this same Whedell, that
+"somehow debtors always give the cold shoulder to creditors, as if the
+creditors owed the money."
+
+Mr. Whedell, left to his own society, flattered himself that he had
+turned a rejected lover to a good account, and entered his library and
+sat down in the cold, that he might not, by his presence, mar the
+harmonious progress of the courtship upon which so much depended, in
+the parlor.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+THE FIRST OF MAY.
+
+Mr. Chiffield proposed, was accepted, and was married in a Broadway
+church about the middle of April. The affair was simplicity
+itself--bridesmaids, groomsmen, costly wedding costume, and the
+subsequent conventional reception at the bride's residence being
+dispensed with. The ceremony was witnessed only by the officiating
+minister, the sexton, the happy father, and about two hundred of the
+floating population of Broadway, including a number of pickpockets, one
+of whom sounded the recesses of the coat tails appertaining unto Mr.
+Whedell and his son-in-law, as they were coming out of church, and found
+nothing in them.
+
+The Siamese twins of the soul passed from the church amid the sneers,
+criticisms, and suppressed laughter of the spectators--who united in
+pronouncing the ceremony a shabby affair, not worth looking at--and,
+entering a carriage with Mr. Whedell, were driven to the New Jersey
+Railroad Depot furiously, as if they had been guilty of some crime
+against society. At the depot, Mr. Whedell kissed his daughter in
+public, and not without a touch of the melodrama, for which he had
+cherished a fondness in his earlier days, and wrung the hand of his
+son-in-law. The train bore the couple away toward the city of
+Washington, where a portion of that indefinite season known as the
+honeymoon was to be passed, amid every discomfort that money could
+purchase. Why they should have gone to Washington in pursuit of bad
+hotels, and other miseries, when they could have procured them in so
+many other parts of the country for a quarter of the money, was
+something which Mr. Chiffield was never able to explain to his own
+satisfaction.
+
+He afterward bitterly regretted that he had not made the nuptial trip to
+Newburg, or some place near the city, where the expenses would have been
+more moderate. But we anticipate.
+
+Mr. and Mrs. Chiffield had been absent ten days. They were expected home
+on the 28th day of April; but a letter from Clementina informed her
+father that she had taken a bad cold, was confined to her room, and
+could not return before the 1st of May. The brief note was written in a
+crabbed hand, and exhibited spots, which, if not lemon juice, were
+tears. She made no allusion to her husband, but wound up by saying, "Oh,
+pa! I am an unhappy girl!"
+
+This intelligence was a thorn in the bed of Mr. Whedell's comfort. Had
+he not arranged to settle with his creditors on the 1st of May? Was not
+the owner of the house occupied and used by him to resume possession on
+that eventful day? And was not everything--even his daily
+food--dependent on the return of his children, as he fondly called them,
+with their pockets full of money? What if this infernal cold should keep
+them in Washington until after the 1st of May? As Mr. Whedell thought of
+himself, turned adrift, and a wanderer, he invariably tore out a few of
+the gray hairs which could be poorly spared from his venerable skull.
+
+Mr. Whedell had a deep and unchanging faith in his ill luck; but, this
+time, he was pleasantly disappointed. The morning train on the 1st of
+May brought back his children to him. They arrived just as those
+Bedouins of civilization--the New Yorkers--were beginning to indulge
+their nomadic propensities. The streets were full of wagons and drays
+laden with jingling stoves, rickety bedsteads, conspicuous crockery, and
+other damaged Penates, on the way to new domiciles. Fortunately, the
+owner of Mr. Whedell's residence had not yet come to claim possession.
+Creditors are early birds; but the hour--sis and a half A.M.--was even
+too early for them; and only one--Mr. Rickarts, the shoemaker--had
+called. He had been disposed of in the library, by the servant, under
+the pretence that Mr. Whedell was not yet up. But Mr. Whedell was up and
+dressed before six o'clock, and was watching for the expected carriage,
+through the window blinds of his apartment. He ran down to the door with
+juvenile briskness to receive the returning ones.
+
+Mrs. Chiffield looked pale and jaded. Her hair was carelessly arranged,
+and her bonnet awry--unerring indications of fathomless female misery.
+To the anxious inquiry by her parent after her health, she only replied,
+"Horrid!" Mr. Chiffield wore the aspect of a man who is disappointed in
+his just expectations. He gave a hearty grip to the proffered hand of
+his father-in-law, but he quarrelled with the driver over the fare, and
+abused him in an under tone, by way of relieving himself.
+
+"And how did you like Washington, my child?" said the fond father, in
+his tenderest voice.
+
+"I hate it!" said Mrs. Chiffield, hurrying into the house, as if she
+were running away from her husband.
+
+"Hum. Well, I'm not surprised that she dislikes the capital. I believe
+most visitors do. Clemmy seems to be a little nervous from travelling,
+eh?" Mr. Whedell addressed these remarks to his son-in-law.
+
+"Nervous? Perhaps she is just a trifle nervous, sir. All women are."
+
+"True--true! One of the peculiarities of the sex. Well, you have had a
+pleasant time, I trust?"
+
+"Pleasant time? Oh! yes--delightful! Your daughter is a charming girl,
+sir, and will make a most excellent wife." Mr. Chiffield spoke as if he
+were very much in earnest, but the expression of his face was not
+of rapture.
+
+"She is a treasure, sir--a perfect treasure!" replied the doting parent.
+"It cost me many pangs to part with her. I trust that we shall not be
+separated now. Why should we be? There are but three of us--just enough
+for a happy family." Mr. Whedell was hinting at a home under the future
+roof of his son-in-law.
+
+"I agree with you perfectly," said Mr. Chiffield, with unaffected
+eagerness. "Let us live together always. It will suit me exactly." He
+was thinking of free board and lodging at the house of his
+father-in-law.
+
+The couple shook hands, mutually pleased at the prospect, and beamed on
+each other.
+
+A part of this conversation took place in the hall, into which the
+hackman had borne the travellers' luggage. A pull was heard at the door
+bell--a loud, confident pull--which Mr. Whedell knew could be inflicted
+only by a creditor. It would not do to admit his son-in-law into his
+budget of family secrets just yet. So he said:
+
+"Now, Chiffield, you must need some rest. Let me not detain you, my dear
+fellow. Your room is on the first floor. I'll show it to you."
+
+Mr. Whedell snatched a carpet bag out of the hand of his son-in-law, and
+hurried up stairs with him. Having turned that gentleman into the
+apartment reserved for him, and shut the door, Mr. Whedell paused at the
+head of the stairs, and listened for the developments below. The
+servant, after waiting for two or three more jerks at the bell, so as to
+be quite sure that it was the bell, went to the door, and there found
+Mr. Numble, the butcher, who supplied the Whedells with meat on the
+strength of the brownstone front.
+
+Pursuant to instructions, the servant explained that Mr. Whedell was not
+up, and asked him to walk into the library and wait a few minutes. Mr.
+Numble growled--as if he scented deception not far off--but allowed
+himself to be conducted into the library. There he discovered Mr.
+Rickarts, the shoemaker, taking down the few books which graced the
+shelves of the library, and evidently pricing them with an unpractised
+eye. The two gentlemen knew each other, and straightway engaged in a
+brisk dialogue about the weather.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+DEMOLITION OF CERTAIN AIR CASTLES.
+
+The coast being clear, Mr. Whedell hastened down stairs to the front
+parlor, where his daughter had secluded herself immediately after her
+entrance into the house. She was lying back on the sofa, with her bonnet
+on, biting the ends of her gloves, and staring into space. She did not
+appear to observe her father.
+
+Mr. Whedell seated himself on the other end of the sofa, and reached out
+his hand, as if he would have taken his daughter's caressingly within
+it. If that was his intention, it was frustrated by her drawing the hand
+away. Then the father heaved a sigh, and said:
+
+"Ah, my child, I am so thankful that you have returned to-day. You will
+save us from ruin."
+
+"_I_ save you from ruin!" said Mrs. Chiffield, in a hollow voice.
+"That's a good joke!"
+
+Mr. Whedell grinned a ghastly smile, as if he did not precisely see the
+point of the jest. "Joke or no joke," said he, "I must look to you for
+some money to put off the infernal creditors, who have begun to flock
+into the house. There's the bell. Hang me, if it isn't another one! To
+come to the point, then, I wish you would loan me, say two hundred
+dollars. It is a small amount, but will stave them off a week or two."
+
+"Two hundred dollars!" Mrs. Chiffield opened her fine eyes in amazement.
+
+"That's all. Perhaps you have saved up the amount from your pin money?
+Or, if you have been a little extravagant, and spent it all, why, then,
+perhaps you can get it from Mr. Chiffield this morning?"
+
+The daughter laughed bitterly again. "I tell you, father," said she,
+"that this man is the meanest creature that walks OB two legs. He has
+not spent fifty dollars on both of us, during our absence. As for me, I
+have never got a cent from him, though I have dropped a thousand hints
+about new bonnets, dresses, and jewelry."
+
+"Gracious heavens!" cried Mr. Whedell, turning pale "But then," he
+added, with an effort to laugh, "Mr. Chiffield is a business man, and
+was an old bachelor. He knows nothing of women's wants. It must be your
+mission to teach him what they are."
+
+"Pooh!" said the daughter; "I don't believe he has got any money."
+
+"Don't talk so, my child. You put me in a cold sweat."
+
+"Anyhow, I examined his pocket, last night, when he was asleep in the
+cars, and found only five dollars there."
+
+Mr. Whedell's jaw dropped. "Oh, no! it can't be," said he, at length.
+"Mr. Chiffield must be a rich man. You remember his fine horses at
+Saratoga and Newport. You remember how much his society was courted by
+mammas with disposable daughters. They never patronize poor young men.
+Their instinct in finding out rich ones is unerring. And furthermore,
+Mr. Chiffield is a member of a firm twenty years old, who are marked 'A
+No. 1' on the books of a mercantile agency, that makes it a business to
+pry into other people's affairs. I paid ten dollars for the information,
+only a month ago. He must be rich! He must be rich!" Mr. Whedell
+repeated it twice, as if the repetition put the question of Chiffield's
+opulence beyond a doubt. "Ha! there goes that dreadful bell again!"
+
+"What you say may be true, but I don't believe a word of it, till I have
+the proofs," replied the daughter, who seemed to delight in taking a
+gloomy view of her case. "Why--will you believe it?--I can't get him
+even to talk about engaging a house in New York. He always dodges the
+subject, somehow. Upon my word, I think he expects to quarter on you for
+the balance of his life. That would be rich!"
+
+Mr. Whedell raised his eyebrows, and emitted a doleful whistle.
+Reflecting, he said:
+
+"You may misjudge him. Perhaps he doesn't like to disturb Love's young
+dream, by looking into the future. That's all--I'm sure of it."
+
+"Humbug!" ejaculated Mrs. Chiffield.
+
+"Poor thing!" said her father, tenderly. "There--cheer up. Depend upon
+it, that you have got a rich husband, who will take all our troubles off
+our shoulders. Stay here, and I will go up stairs and sound him."
+
+Mr. Whedell proceeded to the apartment where his son-in-law was shut up,
+and found that individual in a deep fit of meditation.
+
+"Thinking--and so soon after marriage?" said Mr. Whedell, with a
+charming smile.
+
+"Oh, yes; and I was thinking how much happier is a married man than a
+bachelor."
+
+"You will always think so, I am sure, with my dear Clemmy as your wife.
+My dear Clemmy! How naturally that phrase comes to my lips. And you are
+about to take her away. It's a foolish thought, but I hardly know how I
+shall live without her." Mr. Whedell paused, for effect, and
+contemplated the vermicular work in the carpet.
+
+"A happy thought strikes me," said Chiffield. "You have a house here,
+already furnished. Let us occupy it free of rent, and I will pay the
+housekeeping bills of the establishment. That will be mutually
+advantageous, and will especially suit your daughter, who, of course,
+has a child's attachment for home. What do you say to the proposition,
+respected father-in-law?"
+
+Mr. Whedell did not catch at it with the alacrity that was expected of
+him. "A capital plan," said he, at length; "but, unfortunately, the
+house is not mine. I only lease it."
+
+Chiffield's lips puckered up. "That's curious," thought he. "The old
+fellow must have put his money into bonds and stocks. Well, they are the
+best-paying investments."
+
+Mr. Whedell proceeded to break the news of his penniless condition to
+his son-in-law, gently. "Mr. Chiffield," said he, "as a wholesale
+dealer in dry goods, you must have observed, perhaps at times
+experienced, the fickleness of fortune."
+
+"Can he suspect?" thought Chiffield. "And what if he does? The truth
+cannot be concealed much longer. But I will pump him a little further
+before disclosing all."
+
+"Yes," said he; "our firm, like others, has had its ups and downs; but
+then, business would not be interesting without some little risks,
+you know."
+
+The easy manner of his son-in-law convinced Mr. Whedell that no "little
+risks" had shaken the firm of Upjack, Chiffield & Co. "Ah, yes," said
+he. "Rich to-day, poor to-morrow--the history of the world. As every
+person may learn this by his own sad experience, some time or other, he
+ought to be lenient in judging of those who have become reduced from
+wealth to poverty."
+
+"Can he mean me?" thought the son-in-law. "Faith! it sounds very much
+like it. If so, his manner of broaching the subject is truly generous
+and delicate."
+
+"I agree with you," said he, aloud. "Money does not make the man." It is
+a safe adage, and Chiffield quoted it intrepidly.
+
+"True--true!" replied Mr. Whedell. "Money is but a small item in the sum
+of earthly happiness. Take the institution of marriage, for example.
+What gives to that institution its blessedness--love, or money?"
+
+"Love," responded the unhesitating Chiffield.
+
+"The promptness of that reply shows that he does not expect a fortune
+with Clemmy," thought Mr. Whedell.
+
+"He must suspect--perhaps already knows--the truth," thought Chiffield.
+"How kind in him to spare me the least humiliation!"
+
+"That person is truly rich," continued Mr. Whedell, "rich beyond
+expression, who brings pure love and exalted virtues into the
+married state."
+
+"Generous father-in-law!" thought Chiffield. "He knows that I am ruined.
+Yet how nobly he treats me! I may cast away all reserve now."
+
+"It would be an affectation, sir," said Chiffield, aloud, "to pretend
+that I do not understand to whom you refer, my dear father-in-law."
+
+"The glorious fellow!" thought Mr. Whedell. "He guesses what I am about
+to disclose, and yet calls me a dear father-in-law."
+
+Chiffield continued: "To save any further circumlocution, sir, and in
+order that we may fully understand each other, I will say at once, that
+we are completely--ruined!"
+
+"Ha! What! Who ruined?"
+
+"The house of Upjack, Chiffield & Co. I--I thought you knew it."
+
+"Ruined, sir!" cried Mr. Whedell, livid with horror. He choked for
+further utterance.
+
+"Yes, sir," said Chiffield, who, being a fat man, was happily calm;
+"totally ruined."
+
+"You impudent scoundrel! out of this house!" shrieked Mr. Whedell,
+rising from his chair, and glaring like a wildcat at his son-in-law.
+
+"Be calm," said that phlegmatic individual. "I respect your age."
+
+"Curse your impudence! what do you mean by my age?" (approaching
+Chiffield in a threatening manner). "I'll let you know, sir, that I am
+young enough to kick a swindler like you into the street."
+
+"Pray compose yourself, sir," returned the bland Chiffield. "Your
+surprise and excitement are natural, and therefore pardonable. But my
+affairs are, after all, not quite as bad as they might be. I have a sure
+prospective fortune, if not a present one."
+
+"What do you mean, sir?" asked Mr. Whedell, not quite so savage as
+before.
+
+"That I have talents, energy, a large business acquaintance," said the
+cheerful Chiffield.
+
+"Humbug!" roared Mr. Whedell. "What is all that stuff good for, without
+money?"
+
+"Not much, I admit," was the conciliatory reply. "There fore, sir, to
+come to the point at once, advance me ten thousand dollars to start in
+business again, and I will make a fortune in three years. It was the
+outside speculations of my partners that ruined me. Perhaps you don't
+know that dry goods are going up, sir? Now's the time to buy."
+
+"This man will drive me mad!" shrieked Mr. Whedell, combing his hair
+wildly with his hands.
+
+"Regard it in the light of a family investment," suggested the soothing
+Chiffield.
+
+"You diabolical scoundrel!" yelled Mr. Whedell, in a partial asphyxia of
+rage; "if I had a million dollars to-day, I wouldn't give you a cent.
+You should starve first. But I want to tell you--and hang me if it isn't
+a pleasure, too--that I am a beggar, sir--a beggar, sir--a beggar, sir!
+By noon to-day I shall be turned out of this house. And, by Jove! I'm
+glad of it, for then I shall get rid of you." During this _adagio_
+passage, the speaker shook his fist within a few inches of
+Chiffield's nose.
+
+The summery Chiffield answered, with a hearty laugh: "I see," said he;
+"it's a regular sell on both sides. However, neither of us is worse off
+than he was, since neither of us had anything. As for me, I have gained
+one point, for I have a tolerably good-looking wife."
+
+Mr. Whedell was about to retort in a vein of unmitigated ferocity, when
+Mrs. Chiffield, who had been listening in the entry, and could contain
+herself no longer, rushed into the room, and, brandishing a small
+clenched hand in the face of her laughing spouse, forcibly observed:
+
+"You sneaking, swindling, cheating, lying, black-hearted, ill-looking
+pauper, scoundrel, and vagabond!"
+
+"Very prettily said," remarked the imperturbable Chiffield.
+
+"You miserable thief!" continued his matrimonial partner, aiming a blow
+at him, which he playfully parried; "why didn't you tell me you were
+a beggar?"
+
+"Why? Because you didn't ask me. For that matter, why didn't you or
+your father tell me that _you_ were beggars?"
+
+"I sha'n't answer your insulting questions, you mean, deceiving, ugly,
+ungentlemanly--" (no other epithet suggesting itself.) At this crisis,
+the infuriated wife burst into tears, and wished several times that
+she was dead.
+
+"Poor, dear wifey!" said the emollient Chiffield.
+
+"None of your 'poor dears' to my daughter, you jailbird!" screamed Mr.
+Whedell.
+
+"Now, don't get excited, father-in-law."
+
+"How dare you call me father-in-law, sir!"
+
+"Perhaps you prefer the more endearing epithet of 'poppy,' sir?"
+
+"Monster! will you leave my house?"
+
+"Have you any good old brandy on hand?" asked Chiffield.
+
+"Brandy! No. If you want brandy, sir, go to the d---l for it."
+
+"Not quite so far, thank you," retorted Chiffield the genial; "but I
+don't mind walking to the next corner for a smash."
+
+Chiffield rose, put on his hat, and stepped toward the door.
+
+"Good-by, wifey. I sha'n't be gone long."
+
+A growl, bisected by a sob, was the only reply.
+
+"By-by, poppy," said Chiffield, with a flippant wave of the hand.
+
+Mr. Whedell cast at him a look of scorn, to which justice could be done
+in no known language; and Chiffield, with a bow of exceeding grace, left
+father and child to their reflections.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+MR. WHEDEEL'S CREDITORS IN CONVENTION ASSEMBLED.
+
+These reflections, which were neither profitable nor interesting to the
+parties immediately concerned, were interrupted by a peculiarly
+rigorous pull at the door bell. Pulls of a startling description had
+come so often, the previous ten minutes, that Mr. Whedell had quite
+ceased to notice them. But this long and strong pull caused him to
+start, and remark, "It must be Quigg."
+
+It was Quigg, who had come to make his last appeal. He was by far the
+heaviest creditor. The unfortunate servant girl, acting under her
+general instructions, would fain have shown him into the parlor, where
+his fellow sufferers, having overrun the library and dining room, were
+already in strong force; but Quigg, having immense interests at stake,
+would stand no such nonsense.
+
+"Where is Whedell?" said he. "I can't dance attendance on him all day."
+
+It was always remarked that Quigg put off his slow and stately method of
+speech, when dealing with obstinate debtors.
+
+The terrified Mary lost her presence of mind, and replied; "In the first
+floor, front." Quigg mounted the stairs with surprising agility, and
+gave a hard rap at the door of the first floor front.
+
+Mr. Whedell said, in a voice calm with despair, "Come in." In the few
+minutes that had elapsed since the retirement of Chiffield, Mr. Whedell
+had privately determined to give up everything to his creditors, leaving
+them to divide the spoils among themselves, and then to go out, expend
+his last quarter on a dose of poison, and end his existence. This
+resolution, suddenly taken, imparted preternatural composure both to his
+mind and his face. He could now see his way out of all difficulties--or
+out of the world, which is the same thing. Clementina, who had not yet
+risen to that height of philosophy, buried her face in her hands, and
+sobbed with fresh violence.
+
+Quigg entered, and at a glance saw that he had lost. He stopped short in
+the bow that he was intending to make.
+
+"Well, Whedell," said he, roughly, "how are things to-day?" By "things,"
+he always meant money.
+
+"Not a penny," said Mr. Whedell. "I've done my best to pay you, and
+failed."
+
+"Just as I expected. Serves me right. I never was forbearing with a
+debtor, that I didn't get chiselled this way. Strike me if I ever make
+the mistake again. This marriage of your daughter's, which was going to
+set you up in funds, has proved a fizzle, eh? Instead of taking somebody
+in, you have been taken in yourself."
+
+Quigg laughed; and then remembering that a delinquent debtor was before
+him, assumed his wonted serious aspect.
+
+At this allusion, poor Mrs. Chiffield burst into tears again. Mr.
+Whedell adroitly turned the circumstance to advantage. He pointed to
+her, and said, "There is my reply."
+
+Quigg felt that he was losing ground on these side issues. "Well,
+Whedell, we must have a settlement to day. You owe me one hundred and
+fifty dollars. Turn over all your furniture to me, and we'll call
+it square."
+
+Mrs. Chiffield doubled her sobs anew. But Mr. Whedell said, "Very good.
+Take everything, I shall want nothing where I am going."
+
+Quigg had been accustomed to these dark hints from contumacious debtors,
+and was not to be frightened. "I accept your offer," said he, "and will
+take everything."
+
+At this moment, a rush, as of many feet, was heard upon the stairs. The
+owners of the feet appeared to be literally tumbling up in their anxiety
+to get up. By the time Quigg could open the door, a half dozen flushed
+persons were ready to step in, and did so, brushing him aside. More than
+a score of others followed, and all plunged pell mell into the presence
+of Mr. Whedell and daughter.
+
+"Here we are, Mr. Whedell, by appintment," said the spokesman of the
+party, Rickarts, the shoemaker.
+
+"I see you are," responded the placid Whedell. "Take seats, if you can
+find them, gentlemen." This with a real smile, for he thought of the
+arsenic, and the immeasurable relief that it would afford him.
+
+"We don't want seats, Mr. Whedell; and, if we did, there isn't enough
+for all of us. We want our pay, and have got tired of waitin' down
+stairs for it. You put us all off to the 1st of May, you know, expecting
+you said, to raise money enough by the marriage of your daughter (excuse
+the remark, marm, but business is business) to pay off all of us. We
+found, on comparin' notes down stairs, this mornin', that you had told
+the same story to everybody. Now, sir, as your daughter is married,
+accordin' to the papers, and the 1st of May has arriv', will you be good
+enough to square up?"
+
+Mr. Whedell smiled touchingly. "My good and patient friends," said he,
+"nothing would give me greater pleasure--I might say, without
+exaggeration, rapture--than to pay all that I owe, with compound
+interest thrown in. But, unfortunately for my excellent intentions, I
+have no money."
+
+"Blast me if that isn't just what we expected! I told 'em, down stairs,
+that I'd bet ten to one you couldn't or wouldn't raise any think out of
+your son-in-law."
+
+"Your name is Rickarts, I believe?" asked Mr. Whedell.
+
+"Yes, Rickarts!" growled the owner of the appellation, "You ought to
+know it by this time; for I've dunned you often enough."
+
+"True, Mr. Rickarts, but then I have so many creditors, you see, that I
+cannot be expected to know them all. I merely wanted to observe, Mr.
+Rickarts, that, at least, _you_ have not been disappointed in your
+expectations. Furthermore, that if you had made a bet of ten to one, it
+wouldn't have been a bad speculation for you."
+
+Cries of "Pshaw!" "Humbug!" "Swindled!" "Done for!" and kindred
+expressions, arose from all sides. The spokesman said: "We ha'n't got no
+time to joke, Mr. Whedell. We have only to remark, now, that the best
+thing for you to do is to give up your furniture, without the trouble
+and expense of a lot of lawsuits."
+
+"You are perfectly welcome to the whole of it, my good friends," said
+Mr. Whedell.
+
+"The, deuce they are!" cried Quigg. "Why, you have just turned it over
+to me!"
+
+"I give it to all of you, singly and collectively, severally and
+jointly," responded the happy, melancholy man. "Divide it among
+yourselves, and leave me."
+
+The small creditors, under twenty dollars, took a favorable view of the
+proposition. One of them immediately jumped on a bureau having a marble
+top and elaborately carved legs, and expressed his willingness to take
+that for his pay. Another laid violent hands on the heavy yellow window
+curtains, and declared himself satisfied. A third commenced ripping up a
+corner of the carpet, and notified all persons that he claimed _that_.
+The original owner of the bureau, curtains, and carpet, who had
+furnished the house, and held an exalted rank among the principal
+creditors, objected to this summary disposition of the property. Quigg,
+in very emphatic but improper English, insisted that he had the largest
+and first claim, and warned everybody on their peril not to remove a
+thing from the house.
+
+Mr. Whedell reclined in his chair, positively enjoying the spectacle,
+which was all the more entertaining because the common wrath was now
+diverted from him. Mrs. Chiffield wept behind her handkerchief. Her
+bonnet was knocked on one side, and the flowers were seriously
+disarranged, indicating a real case of distress.
+
+_Sauve qui peut_ was now the motto among all the small creditors.
+Notwithstanding the energetic objections of Quigg and others, they
+rushed down stairs into the parlors, where the best furniture was kept,
+and commenced, taking possession. Rickarts, the shoemaker, seated
+himself on the top of the piano, and said he considered that his'n. But
+a second after, a man milliner, who had furnished two new bonnets to
+Miss Clementina on the strength of the brownstone front, took his seat
+on the other end of the piano, and gave Mr. Rickarts distinctly to
+understand that he was glued to it. The man milliner was a powerful
+fellow, and looked as if his proper vocation were hammering stone or
+rolling iron, instead of handling flowers and feathers. Rickarts
+murmured something inaudibly, at first but, on taking a second survey of
+his neighbor, concluded that he would be more desirable as an ally than
+as an enemy.
+
+"All right," said he; "s'pose we go snacks on this?"
+
+"Agreed," said the man milliner.
+
+Other of the minor creditors, not caring to quarrel for a third or
+fourth interest in the piano, attached themselves to movable pieces of
+furniture, such as ottomans, whatnots, etageres, and chairs. One
+succeeded in unscrewing a large chandelier which hung from the centre of
+the front parlor, and the gas came pouring through the opening in
+odorous volumes, while the spoliator waddled off to the door with his
+prize. Others rummaged the small stock of showy books which consituted
+the library, and were surprised to find that the most imposing volumes
+were bound in wood, with gilt backs, and contained nothing but air,
+which a funny creditor characterized as very light reading matter.
+
+In about five minutes, a considerable amount of portable property would
+have gone out of the house, but for Quigg's presence of mind. Seeing
+that decisive action was required, he slipped out of the front door,
+locked it, and returned in a moment with a couple of policemen, who
+chanced to be strolling through the street at that hour.
+
+On the way to the house, Mr. Quigg succeeded in persuading the policemen
+that it was necessary for the peace of society that they should turn all
+the other creditors out of the house, and leave Mr. Whedell's effects to
+be divided among them according to the regular legal process. As the
+officers marched up the steps of the house, it fell out that Matthew
+Maltboy came sauntering by. Observing the two officers, headed by an
+excited individual, going into Mr. Whedell's house, it occurred, to his
+benevolent heart that that gentleman must be in trouble. He also felt
+moved by a desire to hear of his old flame--for such she now seemed at
+the remote distance of six weeks,--of whose marriage with Mr. Chiffield
+he had read in the papers with the utmost complacency. Therefore,
+Maltboy stepped up behind the officers, and was about to follow them
+into the house. The officers would have kept him back; but Quigg
+recognized his friend of New Year's day, and asked him in, hoping to get
+legal advice for nothing.
+
+"An old friend of mine, and of Mr. Whedell's," said Quigg. "Admit him,
+officers. Perhaps, sir" (Quigg had forgotten his name), "you know
+something about Whedell's affairs, and, as a lawyer" (with a wink), "can
+tell me where he has some property snugly stowed away, that I can pounce
+on. If so, I would cheerfully let the smaller creditors divide the
+furniture among themselves. Any information--ahem!--will be
+confidential, you know."
+
+"I am not a shyster!" said the indignant Matthew, alluding, by that
+term, to the outlaws of his profession.
+
+Quigg was evidently surprised at this unfriendly repulse. "I only made
+the suggestion for you to think on. No offence meant. Please walk
+in, sir."
+
+The door being opened, several of the small creditors were discovered,
+grouped together, with property in their hands. They had made several
+ineffectual attempts to break the lock, or pry back the bolt. The larger
+creditors were forcibly remonstrating against this disposition of Mr.
+Whedell's effects; and a serious row would probably have ensued, but for
+the timely arrival of the police.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+DEUS EX MACHINA.
+
+One of the officers planted himself against the front door, and gave
+general notice that no one would be allowed to remove any of the
+furniture. The other officer stationed himself at the back door, to
+carry out a similar policy at that point.
+
+These manoeuvres caused consternation among the small creditors, and a
+vivid feeling of approval among the larger ones.
+
+"I am happy to announce," said Quigg, "that the counsel of Mr.
+Whedell--one of the most distinguished ornaments of the bar--has now
+arrived, and will take charge of his client's affairs. To those who know
+the name of--" (Aside) "By the way, your name escapes me at
+this moment."
+
+"Maltboy," said Matthew, a little flattered with this compliment.
+
+"I repeat, that, to those who know the name of Maltboy, no assurance
+need be given that Mr. Whedell's affairs will be honorably adjusted."
+Quigg again winked at the young lawyer.
+
+Matthew, having recovered from the flutter into which he was thrown, was
+about to disclaim the office thus thrust upon him, when the voice of Mr.
+Whedell was heard from the first landing. He had come to listen to the
+disturbance, and smile at it.
+
+"It is my dear Maltboy!" he exclaimed, catching at the straw of a hope.
+"Thank Heaven! he is here. Yes, gentlemen, he is my lawyer, and I refer
+you to him for the adjustment of all your claims. Come up, my
+dear Maltboy."
+
+"Oh! it is dear--good--Mr. Maltboy!" added a voice, qualified by sobs.
+"How kind of him--to--to come here at this time! Oh--ho!"
+
+Maltboy never could resist Beauty in any condition; and, for Beauty in
+tears, he would cheerfully lay down his life. He did not deny that he
+was the counsel and confidential adviser of Mr. Whedell, but rushed up
+stairs, just in time to receive the falling form of Mrs. Chiffield
+in his arms.
+
+Matthew felt that he had no moral right to clasp that burden of
+loveliness; but he took it tenderly in his arms, and followed Mr.
+Whedell into the room which father and daughter had just left. There he
+deposited it, with the gentleness of a professional nurse, on the sofa,
+when it opened its eyes, and faintly said, "Heaven bless you, our
+benefactor!"
+
+The creditors were pouring into the apartment. "In the name of
+humanity," said Mr. Whedell, "leave us for a few moments. I appeal to
+you as gentlemen and Christians."
+
+The appeal produced no effect; those to whom it was made conceiving,
+perhaps, that it did not apply to them. Maltboy added the remark: "If
+you will withdraw at once, I promise you that in fifteen minutes we will
+proceed to business."
+
+"That's all right," said Quigg, winking again at Matthew. "Let us go,
+friends."
+
+The proposition was accepted, as the best thing that could be done under
+the circumstances, and all the creditors retired.
+
+Mr. Whedell then locked the door, and proceeded to inform Mr. Maltboy of
+the black-hearted treachery of which he and his daughter had been the
+victims, in the Chiffield alliance. Clementina corroborated the paternal
+statement with numerous particulars, delivered in a heart-broken voice,
+showing what an abandoned wretch her husband was. Matthew listened,
+nodded his head, and said, "The brute!" and the "The monster!" at
+intervals, looking the while into the deep blue eyes of Mrs. Chiffield,
+which sparkled with tears. "If he had but been the lucky man!" he
+thought. But it suddenly occurred to Matthew that these thoughts were a
+little irregular; and, besides, he had a fresh recollection of the
+troubles from which Fayette Overtop had not yet emerged. He therefore
+pulled out his watch, and informed Mr. Whedell that thirteen of the
+fifteen minutes were consumed. The creditors were beginning to pace
+heavily in the entry.
+
+Mr. Whedell, taking the hint, came down to business. His affairs were of
+a kind that were easily settled. He owned nothing except his personal
+clothing, and a few small articles of furniture. Everything else had
+been obtained on credit, and either not paid for, or only partly paid
+for. This statement of affairs occupied one minute.
+
+A minute remained, which Mr. Whedell put to good use. He looked
+appealingly at Maltboy. So did Mrs. Chiffield.
+
+"My dear friend," said Mr. Whedell, "I find myself, at an advanced
+period of life, in this cold world, deserted, penniless. You are the
+only person living that I can call by the sacred name of friend. I have
+already experienced your noble bounty in a loan of two hundred
+dollars." (Tramps of creditors becoming louder outside.) "In a word,
+sir, can you lend me one hundred dollars more? It will at least save me
+from the self-destruction which I had contemplated."
+
+At the word "self-destruction," Mrs. Chiffield cried aloud, and threw
+herself on her parent's breast, with a fresh flood of tears.
+
+These tears swept away the last trace of Matthew's prudence. He whipped
+out his pocket book, and delivered over five twenty-dollar gold pieces
+to Mr. Whedell. The sight of those beautiful coins seemed to reconcile
+the wretched man to life.
+
+Mr. Whedell was about to thank his preserver most profusely, and Mrs.
+Chiffield to burst into a new torrent, when Matthew, to avoid these
+demonstrations, rose, opened the door, and let in the pack of hungry
+creditors.
+
+Now Matthew had, in these fleeting fifteen minutes, thought up no plan
+of settlement. Being taken aback by the sudden reappearance of the
+creditors, he did not know what to propose.
+
+"Everything fixed, I s'pose?" said Rickarts, the shoemaker.
+
+When Matthew was in strong doubt what to do in any case, it was his
+invariable custom to postpone. "I think," he feebly suggested, "that we
+had better postpone final action, say till three P.M. It would give
+us time--"
+
+"Can't come it!" "No go!" "Now, or never!" were some of the exclamations
+which went up from the excited crowd.
+
+Matthew was too good natured to quarrel with these insinuations. "My
+friends," said he, "as you appear to have unlimited confidence in each
+other, suppose you appoint a committee to dispose of this property,
+which my client generously" (cries of "Oh! oh!") "turns over to you, and
+divide the proceeds among yourselves _pro rata_"
+
+The creditors looked at each other suspiciously. A want of that
+childlike trust which, in a perfect state of society should exist
+between man and man, was unhappily too apparent.
+
+Just then, when Matthew was at his wits' end, the police man who guarded
+the front door entered the room, and delivered a note to Mr. Whedell.
+That gentleman perused it languidly, and passed it to Matthew.
+
+"Good news," said he. "Mr. Abernuckle, the owner of these premises, who
+was intending to move in to-day, writes that he will not be able to take
+possession until noon to-morrow. Therefore, I say, let the creditors
+employ an auctioneer, hang out the red flag, sell, and divide, before
+that period arrives."
+
+The large creditors were silent--Quigg veiling his dissatisfaction under
+a look of complete misanthropy--but the small ones, headed by Rickarts,
+the shoemaker, highly commended it.
+
+"Besides," added a butter man, who had originally been in the
+mock-auction line, "don't ye see, we can all stay at the auction, and
+kind o' bid on the things. Hey?" The butter man nodded at the lesser
+creditors.
+
+The idea took; only a few of the larger creditors holding out against
+it.
+
+"My friends," again observed Matthew, drawing on his stores of legal
+knowledge, "you seem to forget that, if my client chose to resist your
+claims, he could retain a large amount of furniture as household
+articles under the law, which exempts certain necessary things. But,
+with rare magnanimity, he gives up all."
+
+The allusion to magnanimity produced some derisive laughs, which
+slightly nettled Matthew.
+
+"Auction it off," said he, "or we throw ourselves back on our reserved
+rights."
+
+At this hint, everybody gave in; and a committee, consisting of Quigg,
+Rickarts, and the butter man, was appointed to make all the arrangements
+for an immediate sale.
+
+It is not pleasant to pursue this painful theme--the decline and fall
+of the Whedell household--farther. Let the historian barely record, that
+the sale attracted a large crowd, and that, by the ingenious side bids
+of the creditors, the furniture was run up to twice its original value
+(no uncommon thing at auctions); that the creditors, large and small,
+were well satisfied with the results; that Mr. Whedell and daughter
+moved to Boston, and became stipendiaries upon a younger brother, who
+had made a fortune in the upholstery business, and whom Mr. Whedell had
+always despised; that Mr. Chiffield took to drink tenaciously in
+consequence of his misfortunes, and never saw or sought after his wife
+from the day when he discovered that she was dowerless; that Mrs.
+Chiffield obtained a divorce from the bonds of matrimony, but had not
+married again at last accounts; and that Matthew Maltboy, Esq., on
+looking over the whole episode of his acquaintance with the Whedells
+thanked his stars that he had got out of their entanglements on the
+reasonable terms of three hundred dollars.
+
+
+
+BOOK ELEVENTH.
+
+DISCOVERIES.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE OLD HOUSE REVISITED.
+
+In the month that followed the acquittal of Marcus Wilkeson, three real
+murders, a railway collision killing thirty persons, and a steamboat
+explosion almost as tragical in its results, occurred. The Minford
+affair was already getting old. Public curiosity, except in the
+immediate neighborhood of the house, no longer exercised itself upon the
+problem which all of Coroner Bullfast's powers of analysis had failed
+to solve.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson might have derived a selfish consolation from the fact
+that other mysteries and calamities were causing his name, which last
+month was on the tongue of the whole town, to be forgotten. But he had a
+nobler and truer source of consolation in his dear books. In the
+presence of the philosophers, and sages, and historians, and novelists,
+and poets, and wits, the men of genius of the past, chroniclers of the
+loss of empires, grave men who taught the vanity of life, and funny men
+who taught the same lesson in a different way, Marcus felt his pack of
+sorrows considerably lightening. His first, last, only disappointment in
+love had subsided into a gentle and not disagreeable melancholy. His
+trial, and the dreadful notoriety which his name had acquired, had
+imparted to his mild nature a gentle tinge of cynicism, which
+improved him.
+
+Marcus was sitting, one morning, in the little back parlor, idly
+turning over the leaves of an old folio, and looking with a half eye
+through the closed window at the houses opposite, and thinking what a
+deal of trouble it was possible to extract from a single block of
+buildings, when a slight rap was heard at the door. Simultaneously, the
+door was pushed open, and Wesley Tiffles shot in.
+
+He had brought all his tonical properties with him. Good nature and
+cheerfulness effervesced from his face. Through the trial, and since the
+acquittal, Wesley Tiffles had stuck to Marcus. Twice, often three times
+a day, he called, and was always welcomed by Marcus, and not
+inhospitably received by Miss Philomela Wilkeson. The interviews between
+that lady and the romantic speculator usually took place, quite by
+accident, in the entry, on the arrival or the departure of Mr. Tiffles;
+but, as it happened, not with the cognizance of Marcus.
+
+On one occasion--at the edge of evening--Marcus went into the entry a
+few minutes after Tiffles had left the room, and saw that gentleman and
+Philomela standing in the doorway. Tiffles appeared to be in the act of
+raising the lady's hand to kiss it; but, if that were his intention, he
+abandoned it on seeing Marcus, and shook the attenuated fingers instead.
+Then he coughed, and, saying "Good-night," went down the steps, as if he
+had not seen Marcus in the gloom. Miss Wilkeson coughed also (why do
+people always cough?), and, turning to her approaching brother, said it
+was a cool night, which was not true, as the night was agreeably warm.
+Marcus had never afterward seen them together, and had forgotten this
+slightly mysterious circumstance. Wesley Tiffles had, as usual,
+something enlivening to tell.
+
+"Got the funniest piece of news for you, my dear fellow!" said he.
+
+"Anything funny is always welcome, Tiffles," said he, closing his folio,
+that he might not appear to obstruct his friend's jocosity.
+
+"I've heard from that infernal old panorama--when I say infernal, of
+course I don't mean to imply that it wasn't a splendid idea, if I had
+had capital enough to see it through--and what do you s'pose the
+landlord and the other creditor have done with it? You couldn't guess
+in a month."
+
+"Well, what?" asked Marcus Wilkeson, laughing in anticipation.
+
+"Ha! ha! cut it up, and sold it for window curtains. A friend of mine,
+who passed through there the other day, says there's a picture of a
+lion, or a palm tree, or a slice of a desert--principally desert--hung
+up in every other window. And the best of it is, that they made a good
+thing of it. The curtains brought at least twice what I owed them. Great
+heavens! why didn't I think of it myself?"
+
+"Of what?"
+
+"Why, to cut up the panorama into window curtains, when Patching had
+finished it, and--ha! ha!--peddle them through the country. By Jupiter!
+that speculation may be worth trying yet. But at present I have my new
+patent process for----"
+
+Marcus coughed, and opened the book. Tiffles accepted the delicate hint
+in a spirit of true friendship, and let his new patent process drop.
+
+"Marcus," said he, "I don't wish to revive an unpleasant subject; but
+have you no idea what the late Mr. Minford was trying to invent?"
+
+"Not the least. I never trouble myself about inventions, as you well
+know, who are full of them. Besides, poor Mr. Minford was not
+communicative on that subject. He kept the secret even from his
+daughter."
+
+"You have a claim on the apparatus, whatever it is."
+
+"Yes. Mr. Minford insisted on giving me a paper to that effect, as
+security for two loans of five hundred dollars each. I took it to please
+the old gentleman." Marcus felt like groaning, as he thought of the
+sorrows that he had derived from his connection with the Minford family;
+but he had just been reading of the consolations of philosophy, and he
+stifled the rising weakness.
+
+"I have thought, Marcus, that there might be something about that
+unfinished machine that could be patented for the benefit of Miss
+Minford. You know I am a good judge of patentable things."
+
+"What do you propose, then?" asked Marcus, concealing, with an effort,
+the emotions which the mention of Miss Minford always caused."
+
+"That we go to the house together. The legal claim which you hold upon
+the machine entitles you to see it, if only to ascertain that it has not
+been stolen."
+
+"The visit you propose is a disagreeable one; but if you think there is
+a possibility of benefiting Miss Minford, I will go. Not that she is
+likely to be in want, however, at present, for I understand that a
+wealthy lady, Mrs. Crull, who befriended her at the inquest, you
+remember, has taken her to her own house."
+
+Without further words--for Marcus retained his old business habit of
+forming his conclusions suddenly, and adhering to them--the friends
+proceeded to the late residence of Mr. Minford.
+
+Marcus had not yet philosophically conquered his dread of recognition in
+the street as the man who had been suspected of a murder. He buttoned
+his overcoat up to his chin, pulled his hat over his brow, and walked
+fast. As he had purposely altered his style of dress since the inquest,
+he was not readily identified. But he was sympathetically conscious that
+several persons whom he passed, and who glanced at him, knew him, and
+that he was pointed out to others when his back was turned.
+
+Reaching the house, they hurried up stairs, hoping to run the gauntlet
+of the three floors in safety. Luckily, there had been a general move
+from the premises--the lodgings being less desirable since the supposed
+murder. The faces which thrust themselves out of the doorways as the two
+visitors passed, were strange ones.
+
+Marcus felt his heart palpitating, and his face growing pale, as they
+ascended the last flight of stairs, at the head of which were the room
+and the mystery. The lodgings had not been taken. The rent had been paid
+by Mr. Minford up to the 1st of May; and no person had been sufficiently
+charmed with the apartments to hire them since that date.
+
+Upon the door was a placard, announcing that the key could be obtained
+by application to the floor below. Tiffles went for it, and returned
+accompanied by an old woman, who looked as if she knew a great deal
+which she did not care to tell. She had been requested by the landlord
+to show the apartments to applicants, but not to whisper a word about
+the murder; and she was almost bursting with her great secret. While the
+old woman was wondering how much longer she would be able to hold in,
+Marcus and Tiffles entered the front room, and quietly closed the door
+in her face. The old woman grumbled at this discourtesy but, as she had
+a superstitious objection to putting her foot in a room where a murder
+had been committed, she leaned against the banisters of the stairs, and
+waited for the visitors' reappearance.
+
+The room looked just as it did on the day of the inquest. The faded and
+worn furniture was all there; the yellow curtains still covered the
+windows; the clock still hung against the wall, tickless. Marcus's eyes
+glanced restlessly about the room for a moment, not daring to look at
+the spot where the old man had received his death blow. But an
+inevitable magnetism soon brought his eyes to it, and his heart was
+lightened as he saw that the blood stains had been carefully wiped out.
+
+The door of the adjoining room--the maiden's bedchamber--was ajar.
+Marcus pushed it open with that slow motion which is a token of delicacy
+and respect. The general appearance of the room was unchanged, as well
+as Marcus could recollect from the occasional glimpses of it which he
+had formerly stolen. The little row of dresses which hung on pegs in a
+corner, and a few simple ornaments, might have been removed, but nothing
+more. Marcus felt that he was intruding here, and he closed the door.
+
+In the mean time, Wesley Tiffles had been examining the mysterious
+machine, which stood undisturbed in its corner, with the protecting
+screen still standing before it. Tiffles had first wiped off the dust,
+and then looked into it, and through it, and over it, and under it, with
+an eye that was predetermined to pry out a secret. Then he felt of every
+wheel, lever, cam, ratchet, drum, and other portion within reach of his
+fingers. Everything was immovable. Then he stood aloof from the machine,
+folded his arms, pursed up his lips, and cocked an eye at it, as if, by
+the mere force of intellect, he would compel the dumb thing to give up
+its mystery.
+
+As Tiffles was applying this species of exorcism in vain, Marcus came to
+his assistance.
+
+"What on earth can it be?" exclaimed Tiffles. "Not a new kind of steam
+engine; or an electrical apparatus; or a clock; or a sewing machine; or
+anything for spinning, carding, or weaving--nothing that is adapted to
+any useful labor. These heavy weights, that have fallen on the floor,
+would give the works a kind of jerky motion for a few seconds, while the
+weights were descending. Nothing more. But the ultimate purpose of the
+machine is a puzzler."
+
+"Mr. Minford always said that it was something that would revolutionize
+the world of industry--that it was a new mechanical principle of
+universal application."
+
+Tiffles laughed a little. "Excuse my levity," said he, "but
+inventors--and I am one of them, you know--always claim that they are
+about to revolutionize the world of industry. I never knew one of them
+to claim less than that for a patent flytrap or an improved sausage
+stuffer. Mr. Minford was a man of genius, I dare say, but he probably
+overestimated the importance of his invention. Have you any objection to
+my prying the thing apart at this opening? I want to inspect some of the
+works that are partly concealed. I pledge myself to put it together
+again as good as new."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+A POSTHUMOUS SECRET.
+
+"Go ahead," said Marcus; and Tiffles, inserting his walking stick in a
+wide gap between two cog wheels, forced the strange machine apart. A
+large brass drum upon which a small chain was loosely coiled, fell to
+the floor. The other portions were not disturbed. Marcus picked up the
+drum; and Tiffles cast his unerring eye in among the new jumble of
+wheels and connecting levers that was brought to view.
+
+"Can't make head or tail of it," said he, at length. "Let me see that
+drum."
+
+Marcus handed it to him. Tiffles took it, like an expert, between a
+thumb and finger, and tapped it with his stick. It answered back with a
+muffled clink.
+
+"It is hollow, and contains some soft non-metallic substance. Ah! here
+we have it." And Tiffles, unscrewing a nicely fitting cap from the drum,
+drew out a close roll of paper. He unfolded it with trembling fingers.
+
+The upper portion of the paper was covered with neatly drawn diagrams,
+which bore some semblance to the machine. Beneath, in the fine
+copperplate hand of the inventor, were these memorable words:
+
+"_Eliphalet Minford's original plan of_ PERPETUAL MOTION, _to which he
+has devoted his fortune, and twenty years of labor. Perseverantia
+vincit omnia_."
+
+"_Christmas Day_, 185-."
+
+Then followed a careful technical description of the plan, and a mention
+of the fact that on two occasions the machine had moved. One occasion
+was the night of April 10, 184-, when the mass of wheels started with a
+sudden click, but stopped in three seconds by the clock. The other
+occasion was daybreak, December 30, 185-, when the works began to move
+of their own accord, and did not stop for six seconds. This record had
+evidently been made by the inventor for his private reference, and
+concealed in the brass drum for safe keeping.
+
+Tiffles read with bated breath; and Marcus listened in astonishment.
+
+"What do you think of it?" asked Marcus.
+
+"I think," replied Tiffles, "with every respect for the memory of the
+inventor, that he was insane. Perpetual motion, without an exhaustive
+power--or, in other words, the eternal motion of a thing by its own
+inherent properties--is a simple impossibility. To cite familiar
+illustrations of its absurdity, you might as well try to lift yourself
+by the straps of your boots, or pour a quart into a pint pot. I wasted
+six months on perpetual motion when I was a boy, and gave it up. Every
+inventive genius bothers his head with this nonsensical problem, till he
+learns that he is a fool. Of course, I say this with every possible
+regard for your deceased friend. He was insane on this point--_quoad
+hoc_, as the lawyers have it--without question, or he would not have
+thrown away twenty years on it;--or twenty-three years, I should say,
+since the paper is dated, you observe, three years ago."
+
+"But Mr. Minford says, in that document, that the machine moved twice.
+He could have no object in deceiving himself."
+
+"You are wrong there, my friend. Inventors are continually deceiving
+themselves. Their judgment, their very eyesight becomes worthless in
+respect to subjects upon which they have labored long and hoped
+ardently. This machine has evidently been greatly altered from the
+original plan in the progress of its construction. You observe that
+these weights do not appear on the diagrams. They were an
+afterthought--recently put on, I should judge, from the appearance of
+the cords which hold them. Anybody can see, as I said before, that the
+weights would move the works spasmodically, so to speak. But this motion
+cannot be what he alludes to as having taken place on two occasions. Of
+course, I can't explain what caused the motion on those occasions--if it
+were a real motion, and not a fantasy of the inventor's brain--but I'll
+bet my life that any intelligent mechanic could have fully explained it
+to Mr. Minford at the time. But, mark you, Mr. Minford would never have
+accepted the explanation. Inventors never take advice."
+
+"So then you are satisfied that this machine is of no value--to Miss
+Minford--except for old brass?"
+
+"Oh! I don't say that. Mr. Minford, aside from this absurd crotchet, may
+have possessed real mechanical genius. Let me see if some part of it may
+not be good for something besides perpetual motion."
+
+Wesley Tiffles peered down among the brazen and steel complexities
+again. "Sure enough, here it is," said he; "a splendid window fastener."
+
+"I don't see any window fastener," exclaimed Marcus, looking in the
+direction of his friend's forefinger.
+
+"There--that cam with a small spring and lever attached. Strength and
+simplicity combined. I have studied the subject of window fasteners--in
+fact, have invented three or four, which possessed the extraordinary
+property of never letting the window up or down when you wanted to move
+it. I recognize, in this window fastener, my ideal. Marcus, you must
+patent it for Miss Minford. It will be a sure fortune to her. I'll make
+the drawings and specifications."
+
+Marcus, sadly happy in the thought of rendering any service to that
+young lady, readily chimed in with Tiffles's views, and said that the
+patent should be obtained as soon as might be.
+
+It was then agreed that Tiffles should call on Mrs. Crull, on the
+following day, and inform Miss Minford of the important discoveries
+which had been made by him--not mentioning the name of Marcus
+Wilkeson--and should also offer to remove and dispose of the neglected
+furniture, as the young lady might think best.
+
+As this conclusion was arrived at, the door opened suddenly. The old
+lady, being apprehensive, from the long stay of the two visitors, that
+they were ransacking the rooms and hiding portable articles about their
+persons, had overcome her superstitious antipathy, and opened the door
+quickly, so that she might catch them in the act. But they were only
+standing in the middle of the room, earnestly talking to each other.
+
+The old lady muttered an inaudible apology; and the two friends hastened
+to take their departure.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+OVERTOP FINDS A SENSIBLE WOMAN.
+
+Next morning, Mr. Wesley Tiffles, after an inexpensive breakfast at a
+cheap restaurant in Chatham street, set out on his mission of goodness.
+He was reduced to his last dollar, but felt opulent in the possession of
+his diamond breastpin--that tower of moral strength to the borrower. He
+whistled as he walked, and thought what would be the best name for the
+new patent window fastener of the future. "Union," "American,"
+"Columbian," "Peoples'," "Washington," "Ne Plus Ultra," and a score
+more, were turned over and rejected. Finally he settled upon the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener," meaning that its destined field of
+usefulness was the whole civilized globe. Patents for it could be and
+should be obtained in England, France, Germany, Russia, and Spain.
+
+While Wesley Tiffles was taking this rosy view of the "Cosmopolitan
+Window Fastener," he stumbled upon Fayette Overtop, Esq., who was
+walking briskly toward his office, and thinking over a hard case in
+which his services had been secured the day before.
+
+The firm of Overtop & Maltboy had recently come into a small but paying
+business, in this way: The release of Marcus Wilkeson was generally
+supposed to have been effected, not by his innocence, but by the skilful
+and professional, but unprincipled efforts of his legal advisers. Their
+name was not unfavorably known among the thieves and murderers of the
+city; and several individuals belonging to those classes of society
+resolved to employ them when they got into their next little difficulty.
+And, since the inquest, another thing had greatly contributed to the
+prosperity of the firm. We allude to the case of Slapman _vs_. Slapman.
+
+This was an action for divorce, with alimony, brought by Mrs. Grazella
+Jigbee Slapman against her husband, Ferdinand P. Slapman. The ground
+upon which the separation was sought, was the continual brutality of Mr.
+Slapman toward his wife.
+
+It was the law and the custom, in cases where both parties to the action
+were agreed to that arrangement, to turn over this species of litigation
+to a referee, who took the testimony in private, heard arguments of
+counsel, and rendered a decision subject to the confirmation of the
+Supreme Court. The Court had issued a standing order prohibiting all
+persons from publishing (except with the consent of the parties to the
+action) any further reports of the cases than a simple announcement of
+the decree, as confirmed by the Court, for or against a divorce. This
+order was put forth to protect the public from the contaminating example
+of matrimonial infelicities; though we are not aware that the number of
+divorce cases has materially decreased, or the standard of public
+morality been greatly elevated in consequence thereof.
+
+The case of Slapman _vs_. Slapman was on trial before a referee, by
+mutual agreement of the parties. The newspapers did not report it; but
+some of them kept hinting at it in an appetizing way. The gentleman
+whose "gallantry, &c.," was the "remote cause of the action," was
+described as "a rising young lawyer, who distinguished himself in a
+recent inquest before Coroner ----, the thrilling particulars of which
+are still fresh in the minds of our readers;" or as a "young ornament of
+the legal profession, whose office was not a hundred miles from the
+corner of Broadway and ---- street" (the precise location of his
+office). One paper went so far as to say, that the "triumph which this
+disciple of Coke had achieved in the late _cause celebre_, was only to
+be equalled by his invariable success in affairs of the heart, &c., &c."
+
+All this caused Fayette Overtop's name to be known by thousands of
+people. Persons who were seeking divorces, reasoned, strangely enough,
+that a man whose "gallantry, &c.," was the cause of a divorce, could
+materially assist them in severing the matrimonial bonds. Therefore they
+began to flock to him. He already had five female and two male clients
+of this description.
+
+When Tiffles stumbled against Fayette Overtop, he at once invited his
+friend to go with him to Mrs. Crull's. His legal knowledge (of which
+Tiffles, in common with the public, was beginning to have a high
+opinion) might be of some service. Overtop had been told by Marcus
+Wilkeson of the previous day's transactions, and of Wesley Tiffles's
+intended visit to Miss Minford; and he at once consented to
+accompany him.
+
+On their way to Mrs. Crull's--whose residence had been ascertained from
+the Directory--they passed Miss Pillbody's select school. Tiffles
+suggested that it would be well to call on that young lady, and pick up
+some intelligence of Miss Minford. She might still be receiving lessons
+from Miss Pillbody; and might, possibly, be in the house at that moment.
+Overtop also thought it would not be a bad idea to call there. He had
+heard much from Marcus Wilkeson in praise of Miss Pillbody, especially
+of her sensible qualities. Being still in the active pursuit of a
+sensible woman, he was moved with a real curiosity to see her.
+
+The servant showed the two callers to the speckless little front parlor;
+and, a minute afterward, Miss Pillbody, looking fresh and neat, her
+narrow collar white and smooth, and every hair of her heavy brown
+tresses in its place, made her appearance.
+
+Miss Pillbody entered the room in that noiseless, sliding way, which
+indicates a constitutional diffidence. Her eyelids involuntarily
+contracted, so that she might see her callers on a near approach to
+them. Fayette Overtop, marking her modest demeanor and her
+short-sightedness, immediately announced his name and that of his
+companion, and the object of their visit.
+
+At the mention of his name, Miss Pillbody started. She had heard of
+Fayette Overtop, Esq., through the newspapers, as counsel for Marcus
+Wilkeson; but not as the philosophic friend of Mrs. Slapman. In reply to
+questions about Miss Minford, she stated that that interesting young
+pupil had not taken lessons from her since the death of her father.
+
+Miss Pillbody here indulged in a little artifice. She produced a
+memorandum book, to see when Miss Minford took her last lesson; and, in
+order that she might read distinctly, drew out her eyeglasses, and
+adjusted them with a graceful movement of the arm and hand. Overtop
+thought that she handled the eyeglasses in a most ladylike manner; and
+that, when they were astride of her shapely nose, they became her face
+wonderfully.
+
+When Miss Pillbody had referred to the little memorandum book, she gave
+one short look at Fayette Overtop. That gentleman, conscious that his
+face was scrutinized, looked at the wall. Miss Pillbody stole but one
+glance, and then shut the eyeglasses prettily, and stuck them into an
+invisible pocket of her waist. She had come to the conclusion that Mr.
+Overtop was a person of dignified and intelligent appearance. And Mr.
+Overtop had settled into the opinion that Miss Pillbody was a near
+approach to that imagined paragon--a sensible woman.
+
+Mr. Overtop was about to make a shrewd remark upon the great superiority
+of private select schools over all public institutions for the education
+of young ladies, when Miss Pillbody rose.
+
+"Do you desire any other information, gentlemen?" said she.
+
+"No, I thank you, Miss Pillbody," returned Overtop, who interpreted her
+question to mean that a pupil was waiting for her somewhere--which was
+true; for Mrs. Gipscon, a fat lady of forty-eight, was taking her
+second grammar lesson in the back parlor.
+
+The two callers seized their hats.
+
+"Could I intrust you with a message for Miss Minford, Mr. Overtop?"
+
+"With a thousand," said that gallant man.
+
+"Please, then, give my love to her, and ask her to come round and see
+me."
+
+Mr. Overtop would have said that he always found it difficult to carry a
+lady's love to another without keeping some himself; but then he thought
+that this might be a little bold for a stray caller. So he answered,
+"With pleasure."
+
+The two visitors bowed, and Miss Pillbody bent her head gracefully
+toward Mr. Overtop.
+
+"What do you think of the schoolmarm?" asked Tiffles, when they had got
+into the street.
+
+Overtop did not like the phrase "schoolmarm." "I think Miss Pillbody,"
+said he, "is--a sensible woman."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+INNOCENCE ON A SLIPPERY ROAD.
+
+Walking with the nervous and unreasonable quickness of city men, they
+soon arrived at Mrs. Grail's. The good lady was sitting at one of her
+front windows, sewing. As she looked into the street, her face was seen
+to have a sad and thoughtful expression. She came to the door in
+response to a sharp ring by Wesley Tiffles, who was tentative of
+bellpulls. Mrs. Crull kept two servants, but she could never get over
+the impulse to answer the door, when she was near it.
+
+Overtop explained that they were desirous of seeing Miss Minford on
+important business.
+
+"The poor, dear child!" exclaimed Mrs. Crull, in a broken voice. "She is
+not here."
+
+"Not here!" cried Overtop. "Where is she, then?"
+
+"I don't know, sir; and that's what troubles me so." Here the good Mrs.
+Crull began to twitch about the mouth. But she did not cry. She had too
+much of the masculine element for that. Her whole life was a struggle
+between the weakness of her feminine body and the strong self-control of
+her manly soul, in which the latter, after an effort, always came
+out victor.
+
+Mrs. Crull then proceeded to explain, a little incoherently, that she
+had taken Miss Minford to her house, the day after the murder, and had
+asked the poor child to live with her, to be her adopted daughter. Miss
+Minford had gladly accepted the offer, and had stayed there until
+yesterday. During the last two or three days, she had noticed that Miss
+Minford, or Pet, as she always called her, was worried about something.
+She would not tell Mrs. Crull what was the matter, but Mrs. Crull
+somehow guessed that it was a love affair. She remembered the handsome,
+dissipated young man at the inquest, and she had seen him standing at
+the corner below her house, only two days before Miss Minford left.
+
+"Left!" exclaimed Overtop, jumping at a conclusion. "Then that villain
+has abducted and ruined her."
+
+"It's bad enough, I fear," continued Mrs. Crull; "but perhaps not so bad
+as that 'ere. Anyhow, I hopes not. I spoke to Pet about that young man,
+and she looked as innocent as a spring lamb at me, though she kind o'
+blushed when she denied having met him since the trial. And, to do her
+justice, I don't think she had met him then, though I sort o' suspeck
+she seen him from the window two or three times--she had a habit of
+looking out o' the window--and that he contrived to have a talk with her
+somewhere and somehow, the day before she went away. And I think he must
+have had the cheek to come into this very room" (Mrs. Crull had shown
+her visitors into her front parlor), "because one o' my servants says
+that she heerd a strange voice in the entry, and the door shut as if
+somebody had gone out. When she come into the entry to see who it was,
+she saw Pet hurrying into the parlor, and heerd her humming a tune. Pet
+wasn't in the habit of humming tunes; and, the servant thought that
+rather 'spicious. So do I--not of any wrong, mind you. I wouldn't
+believe that till it was proved. But, to make a long story short, here
+is the note that poor Pet left on my dressin' table. Read it. I--I
+haven't got my spectacles."
+
+The truth was, that Mrs. Crull's eyes were filling with tears, and she
+could not have read the now familiar lines on that little piece of paper
+even with the powerful aid of her spectacles.
+
+     Monday Evening.
+
+     DEAR MRS. CRULL:
+
+     Please pardon me for what I have done. I knew you would not
+     consent to it, and so I did not tell you. I was afraid I
+     should become a burden to you; though you are too
+     good-hearted to say so. I have a nice place, and am earning
+     my own living honestly. Do not try to find me, but believe I
+     will always be good, and worthy of your love, and, some day,
+     will repay you for all your kindness.
+
+     With love and respect,
+
+     PATTY MINFORD.
+
+"A very strange note!" murmured Overtop. "Young girls are not apt to
+complain of being burdens, or to take such misanthropic views of life.
+There is a man's hand in this. That wretch, Van Quintem, jr., without a
+doubt. Did you never warn Miss Minford against him?"
+
+"Once," said Mrs. Crull, with a faint choke in her voice. "I had noticed
+his glances toward her at the inquest, and I told her he was a bad young
+man, and she must not allow him to speak to her in the street, and that,
+if he should come to my house to see her, I should shut the door in
+his face."
+
+"And what did she say to that?"
+
+"She said all she knew about him was, that he had saved her life once.
+She couldn't forget that. Then I showed her how improper it was in him
+to hide his own name from her, and what horrid holes these gambling
+dens was which he goes to. I also p'inted out how unfeelin' his conduct
+was to his poor old father."
+
+"And what did she say to all that?"
+
+"She nodded her head, and said, 'Yes, so it was;' but I see, now, that
+all my talk didn't make no impression on her."
+
+"The sum of it is," said Overtop, "that she loves this worthless
+vagabond, and knew that you would not permit his visits to your house.
+Therefore she has left you."
+
+Mrs. Crull was a woman of firmness as well as affection. She regretted
+that her opposition to this young man should have been the means of
+driving Pet away. But she knew that she had done what any prudent mother
+would have done for her own child.
+
+"I'm sorry it has come to this," said she; "but I did it all for the
+best, Heaven knows. Gen'lemen, we must find this child. But how?"
+
+Tiffles, being a man of infinite expedients, and accustomed to solve
+problems for himself, and everybody else, at the shortest notice,
+answered at once:
+
+"_Not_ by advertising for her, or putting the police on her track. Young
+Van Quintem would take the alarm, and move her out of town. She will go
+anywhere with him, if I mistake not, until she finds him out better.
+Have you no clue to her whereabouts; or can you think of any one that
+could give us any information?"
+
+Mrs. Crull reflected. "Unless I am much mistaken," said she, "I saw that
+tall, clean-looking boy, Bog, I believe they call him--you remember him
+at the inquest--walking on t'other side o' the street, two or three
+times since Pet come to live with me. He looked sideways and kind o'
+sheepish at the house as he passed. I've a notion that he was a lover of
+Pet's, too."
+
+"He's the man, or boy, for us!" cried Tiffles. "Is in the bill-posting
+business, and knows the town better than I do, if anything. A shrewd
+fellow, judging from his looks; and, if he's in love with Miss Minford,
+then he's sure never to tire of hunting her up. He must disguise
+himself, and find young Van Quintem, and follow him day and night, till
+he brings up at Miss Minford. That's the shortest road. When Miss
+Minford has been found, then we will consider what is to be done next."
+
+Mrs. Crull and Overtop at once approved of this plan, and no time was
+lost in putting it into execution.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+BOG'S OPEN SESAME.
+
+Bog was easily found, and gladly consented to do the work allotted to
+him. It was agreed that he should conduct the search alone, and in his
+own way; but that, after he had succeeded in tracing Miss Minford to her
+place of concealment, he should send word, without delay, to Mrs. Crull,
+and also to old Van Quintem, whose advice upon the subject had been
+obtained. It was thought that the reasoning and entreaties of the two
+together would win back the poor girl from the path of danger which she
+was unconsciously treading.
+
+Bog disguised himself by putting on his old, discarded working clothes;
+and, as he looked at his reflection in the glass, thought how much truth
+there was in the maxim, that "fine feathers make fine birds."
+
+"Go, my good boy," old Van Quintem had said to him, in faltering
+accents; "go among the gambling houses, and other dens of infamy, and
+you will surely hear of my son."
+
+Acting on this advice--which confirmed his own opinion--Bog proceeded to
+visit the gambling houses on Broadway. Child of the city as he was, he
+knew the locations of them all. His constant travels about town, day and
+night, had made him a master of all this knowledge, and much more of the
+sort, which is only useful when, as in the case of this poor orphan
+boy, it serves to show where evil must be avoided, not sought. Thus the
+pilot, taking his vessel through Hellgate, profits by his knowledge of
+the rocks and the shallows, to steer clear of all dangers, and come
+safely into port.
+
+Bog, before leaving his shop, had been provided with this decoy note,
+written by the ingenious Wesley Tiffles in cunning imitation of Miss
+Minford's handwriting. The long, elegant curves, and all the delicate
+peculiarities of her chirography, taught by Miss Pillbody, had been
+copied from the sample furnished by her note to Mrs. Crull. It ran
+as follows:
+
+     MR. VAN QUINTEM:
+
+     DEAR SIR: Come to me at once, for I am in trouble.
+
+     PET.
+
+The plan (Bog's contrivance all this) was to inquire at the gambling
+houses where Mr. Van Quintem, jr., was most likely to be, and, when he
+was found, to send this note in to him by a servant. Bog, having
+delivered the note, was to withdraw to the sidewalk, lie in ambush, till
+young Van Quintem came out, and then follow him to Miss Minford's
+retreat. There he was to wait, and send a swift messenger to Mrs. Crull
+and old Van Quintem. It was not known that young Van Quintem had ever
+seen Miss Minford's handwriting; but, to make the game sure, the note
+had been written with a skill worthy of a counterfeiter, or that most
+dexterous of penmen, young Van Quintem himself.
+
+Bog commenced operations about three o'clock in the afternoon--the hour
+when the gambler and debauchee, who have been up all the previous night,
+are ready to begin their feverish life again.
+
+He first visited a snug establishment near the lower end of Broadway. It
+was situated in the second story, over a nominal exchange office, and
+was the favorite resort of down-town brokers, who, having gambled on
+Wall street till the close of business hours, dropped in to flirt with
+Fortune an hour or two before going home to dinner. Sometimes their
+hour or two was protracted to six o'clock next morning, when they
+staggered home to breakfast and a curtain lecture together. This Temple
+of Faro was never impertinently molested by the police; and it was a
+subject of remark, among people who thought they had been robbed there,
+that there was never a policeman within sight of the door.
+
+In the hallway of the second story occupied by this gambling saloon,
+were a number of doors, which the experienced eye of the boy at once
+decided to be blinds, or, in other words, no doors at all, but only
+imitations. The appearance of the second story was that of a suite of
+unoccupied offices. Whoever rapped at these blind doors, could obtain no
+admission.
+
+At the end of the hallway, Bog came upon a long window, which was
+painted white on the inside. He saw, by a glance at the grooves of the
+lower sash, that it was often raised. There was a boot-worn hollow on
+the floor beneath the window. The unusual length of the lower sash, and
+the nearness of the sill to the floor, would permit persons to step into
+the room easily when the window was raised.
+
+Bog rapped thrice at this window. He had a vague idea--derived from
+reading, perhaps--that three raps were an open sesame to mysterious
+rooms the world over. The last rap had not ceased to vibrate on the pane
+of glass, when the window was suddenly shoved up, as if by somebody
+waiting on the other side.
+
+A negro of intense blackness stood revealed. He took a hasty inventory
+of Bog's old clothes, and then said, "Clare out, now!" He commenced to
+close the window.
+
+"I was told to give you a half dollar," said Bog, bethinking himself of
+a powerful expedient, "if you would find out whether Mr. Van Quintem was
+here, and hand him a letter."
+
+The negro's eyes dilated, and his thick lips wreathed into a grin.
+
+"Mr. Fan Squintem--a little feller with a big black mustache? I knows
+him. Dunno wether he's in, 'L see fur ye." The negro paused. The
+interrogatory, "Where's your half dollar?" could be plainly seen in his
+great eyes.
+
+"Here it is," said Bog.
+
+The negro grinned his satisfaction, pocketed the coin, disappeared
+through another door from which there exhaled an odor of cigars and mint
+juleps, and returned, in a minute, with the intelligence, "He a'n't in,
+Mister. P'a'ps you want to leave some word for him?"
+
+Bog had no time to lose. He said, "Nothing partickler," and hurried off,
+leaving the negro to puzzle over his half dollar.
+
+At the next gambling saloon, near the junction of Broadway and Park Row,
+Bog simplified his method of operations. Before making any inquiry of
+the servant who answered his triple rap, he thrust a half dollar at him,
+and then put his question. This plan saved surly looks and explanations.
+Mr. Van Quintem was a well-known patron of the establishment, but had
+not been there for a week: which was rather strange, the man
+politely added.
+
+Bog continued his search, walking as fast as he could. In second
+stories, in third stories, in fourth stories, in the rear of ground
+floors, in one or two basements, among all the more fashionable gambling
+dens, which, at that period, lay between Fulton and Tenth streets, he
+picked his way. His new system had drawn heavily upon his stock of loose
+silver, and he had but two half dollars left. The question now was, how
+to spend them?--for Bog knew of no more resorts of gamblers on Broadway;
+and there were none on any of the side streets which a man of young Van
+Quintem's style would be likely to frequent. It was the edge of evening.
+
+The boy walked up and down between Tenth and Fourteenth streets,
+thinking what it would be best to do next. He kept a sharp lookout at
+the passers by, hoping to see the object of his search. He paused to
+rest himself a few minutes in the doorway of a photographic gallery;
+and, while there, observed two young men, with sickly complexions and
+bloodshot eyes, coming up the street. He recognized them as young men
+whom he had often seen issuing from gambling places in the small hours
+of the morning. They were talking briskly, and Bog pricked up his ears.
+
+"The very d----l's in the cards lately," said the whitest-faced of the
+two.
+
+"Luck must have a turn," said the other. "By ----" (with a horrid oath),
+"suppose we try Van's?"
+
+"Van's? Where's that?"
+
+"Why, the concern just opened on the corner above. The biggest kind of
+suppers there, they say."
+
+"All right," said the other, wearily. "We'll try Van's."
+
+Van is a common prefix of names in New York; but Bog needed no further
+assurance that this Van belonged to Quintem. The opening of a new
+gambling saloon under his name (with some wealthy backer furnishing the
+capital, as is usually the case) would explain why young Van Quintem had
+not been seen at any of his old haunts on Broadway for a fortnight past.
+
+Bog followed his guides at a short distance. After proceeding two
+squares, they stopped in front of a stylish old mansion, and, after a
+furtive look up and down and across the street, ascended the steps, and
+opened the door. As they did so, Bog swiftly passed the house, and saw
+that a muscular servant stood within the entry, for the obvious purpose
+of preventing the intrusion of persons not wanted there. The large
+diamond breastpins and depraved faces of the two young men were their
+passports, and were _vised_ without hesitation by the diplomatic
+attendant.
+
+Bog took a half dollar in his hand, advanced to the door, which was now
+closed, and boldly opened it.
+
+The athletic guardian of the place, being confronted with this audacious
+youth in old clothes, put on a commanding look, and said:
+
+"Well, sir, and what the d----l do you want here?"
+
+"Only to give you half a dollar, as I was told to," said Bog, "and to
+ask if Mr. Van Quintem was in. Note from a lady, sir; that's all."
+Bog winked.
+
+The servant smiled, and took the coin.
+
+"He's in," was the reply.
+
+"Then please hand this to him, and say as how it's 'mportant. No arnser
+wanted."
+
+The servant received the note, and sententiously remarked, "Consider it
+done;" whereon the boy Bog hurriedly retreated, and hid himself in a
+doorway nearly opposite. He had hardly done this, before the door of the
+house opened again, and disclosed the man whom he longed to see. The
+letter was crumpled in his hand, and his pale face betrayed agitation.
+He cast wary looks in all directions, and then descended to the
+sidewalk, and walked fast down Broadway. Bog emerged from his seclusion,
+and followed him at a distance, always keeping somebody between him and
+the object of his pursuit.
+
+At the corner of Astor Place, young Van Quintem stopped; and Bog came to
+a halt also, half a block behind.
+
+The next minute, the Eighth-street stage, going up, approached the
+corner at a rapid rate, as if the driver were hurrying home to his
+supper. There were but few persons in the stage.
+
+Young Van Quintem hailed the conveyance, jumped in before it could stop,
+and the driver whipped up his horses to an increased speed. Bog was
+tired, and he knew not how far he might have to follow the stage at a
+full trot. He resolved upon his course instantly. Turning the corner of
+Clinton Place, he ran up that side of the triangular block, and met the
+stage. He pulled his old cap farther over his eyes, to prevent the
+possibility of recognition by young Van Quintem, and, gliding swiftly
+behind the stage, when he was sure that the driver was not looking,
+hooked on to the step behind, just as he had done a thousand times when
+he was a smaller boy.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+TRACKED.
+
+Young Van Quintem sat at the farther end of the stage, absorbed in his
+own thoughts. His thin lips moved restlessly at times, as if he were
+arguing to himself. In his hand he still held the crumpled note. Twice
+he unfolded it, and read the contents carefully; then crushed it in his
+hand again. Bog watched him through the window of the stage door--not
+looking straight at him, but with that side vision with which we trace
+the outline of faint comets. He was aware that young Van Quintem looked
+at him twice suspiciously, and then settled back into his own
+meditations. Bog felt safe in his disguise--or rather his original and
+native dress.
+
+When the stage stopped to take in or let out passengers, Bog slipped
+from his perch, and hid himself from the driver's sight. Long experience
+had taught him how to render himself invisible to that vindictive
+personage.
+
+The stage rolled on to the Greenpoint ferry, dropping all its passengers
+by the way, excepting the pursued and the pursuer. It was now evident
+that young Van Quintem was going to Greenpoint.
+
+The ferry boat was not in, and would not be in, and ready to leave
+again, for ten minutes. Bog, having seen his game enter the ferry house,
+thereby conclusively proving his intention to cross the river, slipped
+into a boiler yard near the ferry. There, against a post, he scrawled
+with a stump of pencil, on the back of two playbills (which he had
+brought with him for stationery), two notes, as follows:
+
+     Tuesday Evening, about 8 o'clock.
+
+     Please come to the ferry house on the Greenpoint side, and
+     wait there till I send for you. BOG.
+
+These notes he addressed to Mr. Van Quintem, sen., and Mrs. Crull, at
+their residences. The next step was to find a boy to deliver them. Bog
+did not have to wait long for that. Boys of the ragged and city-wise
+variety may be picked up at any corner of New York at any hour of the
+day or night.
+
+Another Eighth-street stage, which came rattling toward the ferry,
+brought a fine specimen of the juvenile vagrant and dare-devil, seated
+on the step. Bog looked out of the boiler yard, and hailed him with a
+shrill whistle, formed by thrusting two fingers in the mouth, and
+blowing fiercely. The boy recognized the signal of his ragged tribe,
+slid off the seat, and came running to where Bog was standing. As he
+drew near, Bog recognized him as a trusty lad whom he had employed as
+file leader in a walking advertisement procession, several weeks before.
+
+"Wot yer want, hey?" asked this youth.
+
+"Know me?" asked Bog.
+
+"Know ye? No. Yer a'n't one of our fellers."
+
+"Look again." Bog raised his ragged cap, and smoothed his hair back.
+
+"Why, it's Mr. Bogert. Cuss me if it a'n't!"
+
+"Just so, Bill. I'm trying to catch a chap that owes me something, you
+see. He's in the ferry house there, waiting for the boat. I'm going to
+follow him to Greenpoint, and find out where he lives. Then I'll have
+him arrested. Now, there are two people I would like to have as
+witnesses, when I track him to his house. The names are written here;
+and what I want of you is, to deliver these notes to them as soon as you
+can, and tell them to come right away. Will you do it, Bill?"
+
+"Won't I, Mr. Bogert? Jest tell me the names, streets, and numbers, cos
+I can't read handwritin' very well, yer know."
+
+Bog read the addresses, and, at the same time, produced a quarter from
+his fast-diminishing stock of silver. "Take that," said he.
+
+"No yer don't!" said the eccentric youth. "You've done some good turns
+to me. Bill Fish don't forget his friends, I can tell yer. Here
+goes, now."
+
+Bill Fish snatched the notes from Bog's hand, and ran down the street
+after a stage which had just left the ferry house on its down trip. Bog
+saw him seat himself on the step, with his head well hid from the
+driver, and sent a parting whistle after him, to which Bill Fish
+responded with an enormous grin and a jerk of thumb over shoulder at his
+natural enemy on the box.
+
+"I'll give Bill Fish a good job, some day," mused Bog. "Now for the
+scoundrel."
+
+The boat had come in. Bog watched from his hiding place until he saw
+young Van Quintem step on board, and disappear in the ladies' cabin.
+Then he hastened to the ferry house, paid his fare, and entered. To
+avoid being seen by young Van Quintem, he took a seat in that repository
+of stale tobacco-smoke called the "Gentlemen's Cabin."
+
+At the Greenpoint landing, Bog watched young Van Quintem's departure
+from the boat, and stole out, taking the opposite side of the street. It
+was then quite dark, and, with reasonable precaution, there was no fear
+that the pursued would see him.
+
+The young profligate walked up the street several blocks, and turned
+into a side street, occupied by residences, with small shops and
+groceries at the corners, and occasionally at intervals between them.
+Suddenly, Bog observed him looking around, as if to be sure that he was
+not watched. Bog slipped behind a large tree. Having apparently come to
+the conclusion that nobody was observing him, young Van Quintem strode
+on rapidly a few rods farther, and then made a sharp turn into a neat
+little millinery shop, which stood quite remote from all other places
+of business.
+
+When the young man's form had disappeared, Bog ran at the top of his
+speed to a point opposite the shop, where he could readily see what was
+going on within.
+
+The door was open and a strong light from the interior shone across the
+street. There was no tree or awning post, or other object, on the
+sidewalk, behind which he could conceal himself. Exactly opposite to the
+shop, and in the full blaze of its light, was a high door shutting on a
+small alley way. Bog tried the latch, and found the door locked. With
+instant decision, he caught the top of the door, and vaulted over it,
+trusting to fortune not to be caught on the inside. Applying his eye to
+the keyhole, he observed the following condition of things:
+
+The shop was a milliner's, beyond all question. It was filled with
+articles of ladies' wear, whose names and uses were all unknown to Bog;
+while outside, in the air, dangled various patterns of skirts which had
+just then come into fashion; and the public and obtrusive exhibition of
+which is one of the singularities of our rapid civilization.
+
+Behind the counter stood one of those thin ladies who have dedicated
+themselves to the millinery and a single life. At that distance, she
+looked to Bog like a perfectly respectable woman, with a sharp eye to
+business. Farther on, toward the end of the same counter, was the angel
+of his heart, Patty Minford. Her appearance, pale, and therefore more
+touchingly beautiful than ever, threw his senses into that sweet flutter
+which is the proof and mystery of love. He repeated the vow which he had
+made to himself, and dreamed of fulfilling a thousand times, to save her
+from harm at the risk of his life. She was folding up articles on the
+counter, and packing them into little boxes, and did not look toward
+young Van Quintem. Bog thought this a good sign.
+
+The young man leaned over the counter, and addressed some words to her,
+to which her lips moved as if in reply, while her eyes were still
+downcast on her work. He then smoothed out the crumpled note which he
+had carried in his hand, and placed it before her. She started in
+amazement, as she remarked the close imitation of her handwriting; and,
+having read it, shook her head with a wondering air. Young Van Quintem's
+inexpressive face assumed a look of astonishment, and he instantly
+walked to the door, and peered up and down the street, and opposite.
+Then he nodded to Miss Minford, as if to excuse himself for a moment,
+and, darting out of the shop, walked rapidly to the street below, and
+then to the one above, passing Bog's hiding place on that side of the
+street, and causing that youth to remove his eye from the keyhole for
+fear of detection. When he had made this reconnoissance, and satisfied
+himself that there was no spy about, he returned to the shop. In the
+mean time, some pantomime had been going on between Miss Minford and the
+shopwoman, which Bog interpreted to mean that Miss Minford appealed to
+her for protection, and that the shopwoman promised it. This was
+followed by the retiring of the young lady through a door in the rear of
+the shop, and the locking of the door by her female friend, who put the
+key in her pocket.
+
+Young Van Quintem came in, and was surprised not to see Patty. The
+shopwoman explained, with a gesture, that she had gone up stairs,
+whereon he consulted his watch, and then sat down in an armchair in
+front of the counter, as if with the determination of waiting for her.
+
+Bog judged, from all the circumstances, that Miss Minford would not
+again show herself for some time; that young Van Quintem would wait, in
+the hope of seeing her; and that the shopwoman could be depended on as
+her friend to the last. He therefore concluded that he might safely
+spend time to go to the ferry house, and procure the company of old Van
+Quintem and Mrs. Crull, who had probably reached the rendezvous.
+Watching for an opportunity when the young man's back was turned, Bog
+lightly vaulted from his hiding place, and noiselessly ran down
+the street.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+FOUND AND LOST.
+
+When he arrived at the ferry house, the boat was coming in, with his
+venerable accomplices on board. Upon receiving her cue from the
+faithful Bill Fish, Mrs. Crull entered her carriage (which had been in
+readiness for her since Bog started out on his search), and was driven
+to Mr. Van Quintem's. The old gentleman, who was sitting in his study,
+with his light overcoat and hat on, prepared for any journey, took the
+spare seat in the carriage, and, in less than twenty-five minutes, by
+fast driving and the timely cooperation of the ferry boat, they were at
+the appointed spot.
+
+"Have you found her, you dear Bog?" asked Mrs. Crull, breathless.
+
+Bog answered "Yes," and that Mrs. Crull should see her in five minutes.
+That lady then assisted him into the carriage, and kissed him on the
+forehead in a motherly way, which would have astonished the sedate
+family coachman, if he had not been entirely used to Mrs. Crull's
+eccentricities.
+
+"My good boy," said old Van Quintem, in a trembling voice, "are you sure
+we are not too late--quite sure?"
+
+"Sure!" said Bog.
+
+"Thank God! thank God!" murmured the old gentleman. Then he looked with
+a strange interest upon the honest and intelligent face of the lad. He
+was contrasting the history of the poor boy, which he had learned from
+Mrs. Crull, with that of his abandoned son.
+
+The carriage was stopped, by the order of Bog (who calmly took charge of
+the whole proceedings), at the corner of the street below the shop; and
+the party (excepting the driver) walked slowly toward the scene of
+interest. Old Van Quintem's increasing infirmities compelled him to lean
+for support on the arm of Mrs. Crull, and also with greater and more
+confiding weight, on that of Bog.
+
+As the party entered the shop, young Van Quintem was sitting with his
+head turned toward the door by which Miss Minford had vanished, savagely
+biting his finger nails. He wheeled in his chair, and confronted the
+intruders.
+
+"What the ---- are you doing here?" he cried to his father.
+
+"We are here to save a young girl from ruin, and you from another
+crime," said the old gentleman, greatly agitated, and leaning with his
+whole weight, now, on Bog's arm.
+
+"The ---- you are! And you have brought along an old woman, and a boy
+that looks like a pickpocket, to help you."
+
+The phrase "old woman" stirred up Mrs. Crull. She left the old
+gentleman's side, and advanced to within a yard of the profligate. "Old
+as I am," said she, "I'm strong enough to spank such a white-livered,
+broken-down puppy as you are. But I'll leave you to the hands of the
+law. It's a long lane that hasn't any turning, remember; and you'll pull
+up at the gallows at last. That's some comfort!"
+
+Mrs. Crull here became conscious that it was highly impolite to lose her
+temper, and she fell back to the support of her old friend. Young Van
+Quintem laughed at her, showing his white teeth unpleasantly.
+
+"Ah, I recognize you now," he continued, looking maliciously at the boy
+Bog. "You are the young thief that tracked me here, are you? I'll settle
+with you now."
+
+He sprang from his chair, and strode toward the lad. He was met halfway
+by Bog, whom the insulting epithet had stung to the quick.
+
+A foe met halfway is half vanquished. A single glance at Bog's clear,
+courageous eye, and his sinewy proportions, assured young Van Quintem
+that he had more than his match.
+
+"This--this is no place for a row," he faltered. "I'll attend to you,
+some time, in the street."
+
+"I shall always be ready for you," said Bog, smiling at this
+pusillanimous postponement--which is a mild way of making a
+clear backout.
+
+Here the attention of all was called off by the appearance of Miss
+Minford. The quick ear of the milliner had caught her footstep on the
+stairs, coming down. She unlocked the door, and the beautiful object of
+their search stood before them. She was very pale, and tears dimmed her
+eyes. Mrs. Crull flew toward her, and the poor girl fell on her breast,
+and cried as if her heart would break.
+
+Good Mrs. Crull helped her to a sofa, and sat down, and strained her
+young friend closely to her bosom, "Be calm," said she, "dear child!"
+
+Old Van Quintem and Bog looked on with sad interest. The young villain
+stood in a corner, gnawing his finger nails, and revolving schemes of
+vengeance. All waited for Miss Minford to become calm before any
+explanation was sought.
+
+Under the soothing caresses of Mrs. Crull, the young girl soon became
+comparatively tranquil. With her head still pillowed on the broad bosom
+of her protectress, she made a broken statement to the following effect,
+in response to the tender questionings of that lady:
+
+She said that she had no thought of leaving the house of her dear
+friend, until he had told her how much better it would be to earn her
+own living at some easy and pleasant trade, than to be dependent on one
+who was not a relative. He had also told her that, one day, when he was
+passing the house, he heard Mr. Crull scolding because Mrs. Crull had
+brought a girl home to be her companion.
+
+At this point, Mrs. Crull turned furiously toward the pale offender.
+"You miserable wretch!" said she. "I only wish my dear old man was here,
+to thrash you soundly. Why, he loved this little darling almost as much
+as I did. Besides, I'm the mistress of our house; and he never meddles
+with my affairs. Go on, dear Pet."
+
+Pet then stated that he (she never called him by his name) had promised
+to get a place for her, and that she, supposing he was a true friend,
+had accepted the offer of his aid. One day, when they had met by
+appointment (which was very wrong, she admitted, with a fresh torrent of
+tears), he told her that he had found a nice situation for her in a
+milliner's shop in Greenpoint, and that she must come right away, or she
+would lose the chance. She went home, and packed up her few things in a
+handkerchief, and came with him here in a carriage. She came directly
+here, and had not been out of Mrs. Wopping's sight since then. Mrs.
+Wopping had treated her very, very kindly.
+
+Mrs. Wopping, who had been lying in wait for her opportunity, here spoke
+up. She was a respectable woman, she said, thank God! and had been in
+the business for fifteen years, in New York. They could inquire about
+her in Canal street, where she had served her apprenticeship; in
+Division street, where she had been a forewoman; and in Grand street,
+where she had kept a shop. In an evil hour, she had been persuaded to
+start a millinery establishment in Greenpoint; and a very bad time she
+had had of it. All she knew about this unfortunate affair, was this: The
+young man, there, had called on her, a few days ago, and said that he
+wanted to do a favor for an orphan girl, who was a distant relative of
+his. She was poor, he said, but proud--no strange thing, Mrs. Wopping
+believed--and would not accept anything directly from him.
+
+"Therefore," said Mrs. Wopping, "he wanted to arrange with me to give
+her some easy work to do, enough to make her think she was earning her
+own living, and he would pay me her board, and give me twenty shillings
+a week to hand to her as her wages. By this plan, I could get a boarder
+at a fair price, and the services of a young lady to wait on the shop
+for nothing. Very imprudently, I consented, but not before I had made
+the young man there swear to Heaven that his intentions were honorable.
+This he did in the most solemn manner. I loved the dear girl at first
+sight, and determined to watch over her, and keep her from harm. I had a
+little sister once--long since dead--that much resembled her. I should
+add, that, though Miss Minford seemed to think very well of the young
+man there, when he brought her here, she became quite suspicious of him
+yesterday--he was here all yesterday afternoon--and refused to ride out
+with him, though he had brought a handsome carriage for her. I advised
+her not to go."
+
+"Thank you, good Mrs. Wopping!" said Mrs. Crull, shaking that lady by
+the hand, "you have been a true friend to our dear child; and I'll
+order my bonnets from you for the futer. Virtue shouldn't always be its
+own reward.
+
+"You see, now, my darling," continued Mrs. Crull, "what a scoundrel you
+have escaped from. Will you be my adopted child forever? Speak, my
+precious!"
+
+Poor Pet threw her soft white arms around the thick neck of her
+protectress, and cried for joy. "Dear, dear mother!" she murmured.
+
+There was a pause, daring which everybody but young Van Quintem had
+occasion to wipe their eyes. He paced up and down, his brow wrinkled,
+and inextinguishable hate flashing from his eyes.
+
+"Well, sir," said his father, calmly, "what atonement have you to make
+for this outrage?"
+
+"You're a ---- old fool, and that's all I've got to say."
+
+"Heaven be praised that his poor mother was not spared for this sorrow!"
+was the tranquil reply.
+
+"Curse you--and the old woman's memory. You're always making a fuss
+about her."
+
+The benignant expression of old Van Quintem's face vanished instantly,
+and a just rage gleamed on every feature. "Unnatural son! monster!
+fiend!" he cried, raising his hands aloft; "at last you have gone too
+far. Leave my presence, sir, and never--never--let me see your face
+again. I say to you, and before these witnesses, that I disown and
+disinherit you forever--forever--forever!"
+
+The coward son could not endure that terrible visitation of parental
+wrath, and fled, without another word, from the shop.
+
+Old Van Quintem fell exhausted upon the strong shoulder of the boy Bog.
+
+"Henceforth," said he, "you--you--shall be my son."
+
+[Illustration: FATHER AND SON.]
+
+
+
+BOOK TWELFTH,
+
+SPECULATIONS--PECUNIARY AND MATRIMONIAL.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+THE "COSMOPOLITAN WINDOW FASTENER."
+
+The "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" was a veritable success. For the
+first time in his life, Mr. Wesley Tiffles's theories had been
+demonstrated by results. Had the "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" been his
+own invention, and disposed of for his own behoof, he would have
+abandoned it long before its merits had been fairly tested, and tried
+some other of the myriad schemes that floated through his brain. But the
+profits of the "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" went to another; and this
+was the secret of Wesley Tiffles's persistent (and therefore successful)
+exertions.
+
+This was his plan of operations: In the first place, from the funds
+supplied by Marcus Wilkeson, he procured a patent for the invention. In
+the second place, he put an advertisement a column long in every daily
+paper--six insertions paid in advance--and handed a highly polished
+brass model of the invention to the editor, with a request to notice, if
+perfectly agreeable. The just and logical result followed. Instead of
+the ten-line paragraph with which patent churns and washing machines
+are ordinarily turned loose on society, the "Cosmopolitan Window
+Fastener" received notices so long and ornate, that it was quite
+impossible to derive from them a correct idea of the matchless
+simplicity of the invention.
+
+Having thus roused public curiosity, Tiffles, in the third place, took
+an office on Broadway, and put up a large sign inscribed in gilt
+capitals, "The Cosmopolitan Window Fastener Manufacturing Co." From this
+_pou sto_, Archimedes-like, he commenced to move the world of house
+owners. This he accomplished by the following manoeuvre: He caused
+double-leaded advertisements, under the head of special notices, to be
+inserted in all the papers, informing the public that it would be
+utterly impossible to supply the demand for the "Cosmopolitan Window
+Fastener," and that, therefore, it would be useless to send in orders.
+The Company were employing all the resources of two large manufacturing
+establishments; but it was evident that these would fail to meet the
+extraordinary and totally unexpected demand for this indispensable
+protection against burglars--this moral safeguard, as it might not
+inappropriately be called, of civilized homes. The Company had made
+every effort, but without success, to secure a force of skilled workmen
+equal to the emergency. Justice to their customers in all parts of the
+country, compelled the Company to announce that no orders received after
+that date could be filled under two months. Under these remarkable--they
+might say, in some respects, disagreeable--circumstances, they begged
+leave to throw themselves on the indulgence of a generous public.
+
+These notices were put forth not only in the form of newspaper
+advertisements, but as placards and handbills, which were stuck all over
+the city, and thrown into all the stages, falling like autumn leaves
+into the laps of passengers. This was the cooeperative work of the boy
+Bog, who, though adopted by old Van Quintem as his son and heir, had not
+yet given up the bill-sticking business, but, on the contrary, had
+increased it, and now had a practical monopoly of it in the city, with
+branches in the suburbs. Bog would not eat the bread of idleness--and so
+he had modestly told Mr. Van Quintem--and that fine old gentleman had
+patted him on the back, and told him that there was genuine Dutch
+blood in him.
+
+Bogert & Co. now employed a hundred lads; and Bog's department of labor
+was the general planning of operations, and the receiving and
+disbursement of the money--and a very nice and agreeable department it
+was. It enabled Bog to dress neatly, and keep his hands clean--two
+points upon which he was now extremely fastidious. Bog was growing tall,
+manly, and handsome. He was also showing a great improvement in his
+grammar and pronunciation--the fruit of diligent attendance at the
+evening school.
+
+The public, being thus continually informed that orders for the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener" could not possibly be filled under two
+months, very naturally began to send in orders for the invaluable
+invention, to be filled after that period. Every mail brought hundreds
+of them from all parts of the country. The Company--that is, Wesley
+Tiffles--sat at their desk in the Broadway office from, nine to three
+o'clock, exhibiting the window fastener to hundreds of visitors, and
+receiving orders rather as a matter of favor to the customer than to
+the Company.
+
+At the end of a month, when orders to the amount of nearly seventy-five
+thousand dollars had been received--every Northern and Western State
+being extensively represented on the books--the Company issued another
+advertisement, to the effect that, owing to the overwhelming pressure of
+business, they were willing to dispose of patent rights for two of
+the States.
+
+There was a rush of applicants, to all of whom the Company could
+truthfully exhibit large and genuine orders from all the States. The
+rights for two States were readily sold, and the Company then found that
+they could spare one more for a fair compensation; and so on, until
+every State in the Union had been disposed of, and the Company had not
+an inch of United States territory left. Not only this, but liberal
+purchasers were found for Cuba, Canada, South America, England, France,
+Germany, Russia, and all the countries of the Continent.
+
+In three months, the Company had disposed of their entire interest, and
+realized about one hundred thousand dollars cash. This sum Tiffles had
+faithfully paid over, as fast as received, to Fayette Overtop, who not
+only represented Marcus Wilkeson (unknown to Pet), but was Pet's own
+attorney and agent. By Fayette Overtop it was placed in bank, credited
+to Miss Patty Minford, and subject to her order alone.
+
+Thus it happened that the poor inventor had not toiled in vain for the
+child that he loved.
+
+Tiffles--with that strange unselfishness sometimes found in men of his
+class--had not thought of or desired any compensation for his services,
+other than the payment of all the bills incurred in the operation. The
+pleasure which he took in manipulating the public, and seeing his labors
+crowned with success, was the only reward that he wished for.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson, however, as soon as he saw that Tiffles was actually
+about to perform the amazing feat of raising money, determined, as an
+act of common justice, to insist upon his receiving twenty per cent. of
+the total. Tiffles flatly refused, at first, saying (which was true)
+that he could work a great deal better if he had no personal interest in
+the scheme; but yielded, at length, to the earnest solicitations of
+Marcus, backed by the emphatic declaration of Miss Minford (through her
+attorney), that she would not touch a penny of the money unless he
+consented. So, when the affairs of the Company were wound up, Tiffles
+found himself the possessor of twenty thousand dollars--a sum whose
+existence in a concrete form he had always secretly disbelieved. And
+Tiffles's first act was to settle up all his outstanding debts.
+
+The unexpected acquisition of this immense sum imparted a charm to every
+object in life except Miss Philomela Wilkeson.
+
+Poor Miss Wilkeson was quick to discern the change in Tiffles's manner
+toward her. His calls were as frequent as ever, but were exclusively on
+her half-brother, and had no side bearing in her direction. He no longer
+lingered in the entry to converse with her; and flatly refused her
+invitation to take a glass of wine in the dining room. Most ominous of
+signs, he did not press her hand in the least, when he took it in his
+own. His voice was no longer winning, but harsh and neglectful.
+Indifference brooded in the heart of the monster. The worst of it was,
+that he had been so cautious and noncommittal in his declarations, that
+she could not upbraid him for his perfidy. With a cold calculation
+worthy of a demon, he had made love in the pantomimic way, and eschewed
+written or verbal communications of an erotic nature. No jury could have
+muleted him one cent for damages in a breach-of-promise case, and
+he knew it.
+
+While Wesley Tiffles slipped off Miss Wilkeson like a loose glove, she
+might as well have tried to divest herself of her natural cuticle as to
+banish all thoughts of him. Miss Wilkeson was accustomed to allude
+mysteriously to certain sentimental affairs of her youth. In
+confidential moments, her friends had been favored with shadowy
+reminiscences of a romantic past. But truth compels us to state that
+Miss Wilkeson had never been the recipient of that delicate and awkward
+thing known as a proposal, and that she had never been kissed by man or
+boy since she wore long dresses. Hence the magnified importance which
+she attached to that kiss which, in a moment of reckless but cheap
+gallantry, Wesley Tiffles, on one fatal evening, had impressed upon her
+withered hand. She loved the destroyer of her peace with the pent-up
+energies of forty years.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+MIDDLE-AGED CUPID.
+
+Being in ignorance of Tiffles's sudden fortune, she was at a loss how to
+explain his defection. She conjectured all things, and finally settled
+down to the conclusion that he was a coy young man, and had not been
+sufficiently encouraged by her. She remembered instances where he had
+exhibited signs of ardor--in one case so far as beginning to slip a hand
+around her waist--and she had repelled him. He was evidently waiting for
+some marked encouragement. How foolishly prudish she had been!
+
+One evening, as Wesley Tiffles was passing through the hall to the door,
+after a rattling hour with the three bachelors, he was confronted by
+Miss Wilkeson, who chanced to leave the front parlor on a journey up
+stairs at that moment. She was dressed in a light silk, and her hair was
+carefully braided, and her face had a pink color in some parts, which
+contrasted well with the pallor in other parts; and her glass had told
+her that she was looking uncommonly youthful and charming. She had
+carefully studied her part, which was to be a bold one, throwing off
+all reserve.
+
+"Good evening, Mr. Tiffles," said she, promptly offering her hand.
+
+He took it with unsqueezing indifference. She had expected that.
+
+"Mr. Tiffles," said she, with an air of youthful raillery, "you are a
+naughty man, and I had an idea of not speaking to you again."
+
+"Naughty!" said Tiffles, astonished. "How?"
+
+"Why, you have hardly been civil to me, of late. I do believe you
+wouldn't speak, or shake hands with me, if I didn't always set the
+example." This in a half-complaining, half-laughing way.
+
+It suddenly flashed upon Tiffles that he had been, for some time,
+rather neglectful of the lady. It also forcibly occurred to him that it
+was wise policy to be on good terms, at all times, with the mistress of
+the house; and such was Miss Wilkeson's present position. He therefore
+clutched her hand again, gave it a faint squeeze, and said that he
+apologized a million times for his rudeness; but the fact was, he had so
+much business on hand, that he had been turned into a perfect bear, he
+supposed. He playfully challenged Miss Wilkeson to step into the parlor
+and take a glass of wine, and he would show her that he was not the
+brute she fancied.
+
+Miss Wilkeson laughingly accepted the challenge. "But I do believe," she
+added, "that it is only the glass of wine you care for. Now tell me, Mr.
+Tiffles, aren't you a woman hater?"
+
+"When a man is asked that question, categorically, by a woman, his most
+effective answer is to make love to her out of hand. Tiffles was not
+prepared to do this in the present case, but he was willing to pay
+compliments to any extent.
+
+"Ah, Miss Wilkeson, there you do me great injustice," said he, with his
+pleasantest of laughs. "I drink this glass of wine to 'lovely woman,'"
+with a nod at Miss Wilkeson.
+
+Miss Wilkeson giggled, and took a fly's sip from the brim of her glass.
+
+Tiffles heaved a sigh. "We bachelors are poor, unhappy fellows, really
+to be pitied."
+
+"You are horrid creatures--you know you are--and deserve no pity from
+us!" Miss Wilkeson played her frisky, juvenile part admirably.
+
+"So charming, and yet so cruel!" said Tiffles, uttering the first
+preposterous compliment that he thought of.
+
+"You flatterer!" said Miss Wilkeson, beating a breeze toward him with
+her fan.
+
+Tiffles, observing that matters were coming to a crisis, paused. Miss
+Wilkeson interpreted his silence as another attack of timidity. Time was
+valuable to her, and this kind of conversation might be kept up all
+night, and amount to nothing. She resolved upon her final _coup_.
+
+"Oh! oh! Mr. Tiffles, what--what is the matter?" She looked wildly about
+her.
+
+"The matter! What matter?" exclaimed that gentleman, little suspecting
+what was to happen.
+
+"The wine--the warm weather--something--oh! oh!"
+
+"With these inexplicable remarks, Miss Wilkeson dropped her fan, uttered
+a slight but sharp scream, and fell back in her chair, like a withered
+flower on a broken stalk.
+
+"By thunder, she has fainted!" said the excited Tiffles. He had never
+been in a similar dilemma, and did not know what to do. He had heard
+tickling of the feet highly recommended in such cases; but that was
+obviously impracticable. A dash of cold water in the face was also said
+to afford instant relief; but there was no water at hand. "I must call
+for help," said he.
+
+This remark appeared to arouse Miss Wilkeson. "Support me," she
+murmured. "I shall be better soon."
+
+Tiffles, all accommodation, clasped her fragile waist with an arm, and
+gently inclined her head upon his shoulder. She heaved a sigh, and gave
+other tokens of returning animation. Tiffles here noticed that her face
+had not the prevailing paleness which always accompanies fainting. He
+instantly suspected the true nature of Miss Wilkeson's complaint.
+
+The noise of quick footsteps resounded in the entry. Marcus, Overtop,
+and Maltboy had heard the sharp scream, and were rushing to the rescue.
+
+"Good heavens! what will they say?" exclaimed Tiffles. "Don't be silly,
+Miss Wilkeson, at your time of life." This cutting remark was wrung from
+him by the annoyance and confusion of the moment.
+
+It served as a wonderful anodyne; for Miss Wilkeson Jerked herself into
+an erect position, and said, "You're a fool!"
+
+At this juncture, before Tiffles had quite uncoiled his serpentine arms
+from her, and while she was looking fiery indignation at him, the door
+was pushed open, and the three bachelors rushed in.
+
+"I really beg pardon," said Marcus. "No occasion for my services, I
+see--ahem!"
+
+"Heard a scream--thought it was here--no intention to intrude," added
+Overtop.
+
+The tableau reminded Maltboy of his own innumerable little affairs, and
+he laughed. "It's a lovers' quarrel," said he, "and not to be
+interrupted, of course."
+
+The three bachelors hastily evacuated the room, and their merry laughs
+rang in the entry.
+
+"Miss Wilkeson," said Times, consulting his watch--he carried a gold
+one, with an enormous gold chain--"you must really excuse me. Important
+business engagement at nine. Good evening." So saying, Tiffles
+precipitately retired, with the determination not to enter the house
+again until he knew that Miss Wilkeson was out of it.
+
+A week from that memorable day, Tiffles met Marcus Wilkeson on Broadway.
+
+"Why haven't you been to see us?" said Marcus.
+
+"Not been very smart, of late," explained Tiffles.
+
+"Fainting fits, perhaps. Maybe they are catching, eh?"
+
+Tiffles smiled, for he saw that Marcus knew the truth. "How is Miss
+Wilkeson?" he asked, respectfully.
+
+"She has gone into the country for her health, and will probably stay
+away a number of years. In short, I have engaged for her the position of
+first preceptress of a female seminary in the middle of the State. She
+said she was quite sick of the hollow and heartless life of New York."
+
+Marcus spoke truly. Miss Wilkeson had retired to the country with a
+thorough feeling of disgust for town existence. She has taught for
+several years, and is still teaching in the ---- Young Ladies' Seminary,
+with eminent success, though her fair pupils complain, with much pretty
+pouting, of her savage restrictions upon all walks and talks with the
+eligible young beaux of the village. They say that she hates the men;
+and they call her a cross old maid, and a great number of other
+hard epithets.
+
+But, sometimes, a tear is observed in the corner of her eye, which she
+hastily wipes away. That tear is an oblation upon the memory of a lost
+love. That lost love was, and is, and always will be, Wesley Tiffles.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+SLAPMAN _vs_. SLAPMAN.
+
+The case of Slapman _vs_. Slapman occupied the attention of the referee,
+Samuel Goldfinch, Esq., over two months. That gentleman was corpulent,
+fond of good dinners, and had a highly cultivated taste for scandal. It
+had been his custom to give this interesting case a hearing one or two
+hours every afternoon, daily, after court. It was a relief from the
+heavy business of the day; for Goldfinch had heavy business, which came
+to him because he was a fat and pleasant fellow, with a large head, and
+a great circle of miscellaneous acquaintance. The real work of the
+office was done by a modest, unappreciated man named Mixer. On the
+occasion of these antimatrimonial audiences, Mixer sat in the back room,
+grubbing among his dusty papers; while Samuel Goldfinch, Esq., in the
+front room, with shut doors, leaned back in his easy chair and
+surrendered himself to enjoyment.
+
+In the case of Slapman _vs_. Slapman, a great number of witnesses had
+been examined on each side. Affidavits, amounting to hundreds of pages,
+had been obtained in distant States--some as far away as California. The
+lawyers had spared neither their own time nor the money of their clients
+in raking together testimony which would bear in the slightest degree
+upon the interests which they represented. All the relatives of Mr.
+Slapman had testified that he was a gentleman uniformly kind and
+courteous, possessing a singular placidity of temper, and indulgent to
+his wife to a degree where indulgence became a fault. Those relatives,
+and they were numerous--particularly in the country branch--who had
+passed anniversary weeks at Mr. Slapman's house, were very severe on
+Mrs. Slapman. She was a proud, disagreeable woman. She was continually
+snubbing her husband before people. She had a great many male friends,
+whose acquaintance she had retained in defiance of his wishes. She was
+known to have received letters from men, and when her husband had
+desired to peruse them, had laughed at him. It is true that she
+pretended to be a patroness of literature, science, and the arts; but
+anybody could see that those things were only the cover of the grossest
+improprieties. She had been heard to listen without remonstrance, to
+declarations of love from several young men. It turned out, upon
+cross-examination, that these irregularities took place in charades and
+plays, of which Mr. Slapman's relatives had been shocked spectators.
+With regard to Mr. Overtop's transactions in the family, they could say
+nothing; for they had long since ceased to visit Mrs. Slapman, on
+account of her disgraceful conduct--and also (they might have added, but
+they did not add) because Mrs. Slapman latterly had her house full of
+Jigbees, and put her husband's relatives into obscure rooms in the third
+story, and quite forgot their existence afterward.
+
+_Per contra_, all the Jigbees--and they were a prolific race--swore that
+their distinguished relative was a pattern of artlessness and innocence.
+That she was remarkable from early childhood for a charming frankness
+and transparent candor. That when this bright ornament of the Jigbee
+stock was sought in marriage by the defendant, the whole family, with
+one mind and voice, opposed the match. They had felt that a being of her
+exalted intellectual tastes was too good for a sordid money-getting
+creature like Slapman. But that man, by his ingenious artifices, had
+succeeded in winning the hand of their gifted kinswoman, and married her
+against their unanimous protests. There was but one consolation for this
+family misfortune. Mr. Slapman was reported to be wealthy, and could
+afford to indulge his wife in the exercise of her noble longings for
+TRUTH. They were willing to say that Mr. Slapman had not been illiberal,
+so far as vulgar money was concerned. He had given to his wife the house
+and lot which she occupied, and had never stinted her in respect of
+allowances. But what was money to a woman of Mrs. Slapman's soul, when
+her husband withheld from her his confidence and trust, regarded her
+innocent labors in behalf of Art, Literature, and the Drama, with a
+cold, unsympathizing eye, and finally descended so low as to feel a
+brutal jealousy of those gentlemen of talent, of whom she was the
+revered patroness?
+
+"Money" (we are quoting here from the remarks of Mrs. Slapman's eminent
+counsel) "is very desirable in its way, but is it not the vilest dross,
+your Honor, when compared with the pure gold of connubial trust and
+sympathy?" Mr. Goldfinch nodded his head, as if to say that he rather
+thought it was.
+
+The testimony of two servant girls established the fact that Mr. Slapman
+had several times been overheard to tell his wife that she would regret
+it; and that the time was fast coming when forbearance would cease to be
+a virtue; also that the worm, when trodden on repeatedly, might at last
+turn and sting, and many other enigmatical sayings of that character.
+The very vagueness of these threats, implying unknown horrors, had
+inspired his wife with a mortal dread of him. She did not know at what
+moment this jealous and revengeful man might strike her dead. She had
+been living in the fear of her life for six years, and, during all this
+time, had never complained, or expressed that fear to one of her
+relatives or friends.
+
+"Such is the noble, uncomplaining nature," said the eminent counsel, in
+reference to this fact, "of the woman that Fate has thrown into the arms
+of a fiend."
+
+But the most striking proof of Mr. Slapman's murderous designs upon his
+wife, was his conduct at the last dramatic _soiree_. Twenty witnesses
+swore that it was his evident intention to spring on her and strangle
+her, and that he was only thwarted in this horrid purpose by the noble
+courage of Fayette Overtop, Esq. Mr. Overtop briefly and modestly
+testified to this effect also; and, furthermore, narrated all the
+particulars of his acquaintance with Mrs. Slapman, holding before her a
+shield, from which the arrows of calumny, aimed by her husband,
+fell harmless.
+
+Mr. Slapman had not shown himself in the referee's office since the
+investigation began. He had become convinced that he had lost the case
+into which his mad jealousy and his lawyer's advice had plunged him.
+Mrs. Slapman, according to the testimony of the two servants and several
+others, was immured in her house, and brooding over this saddest episode
+in her unhappy history.
+
+"Nothing but that instinct of self-preservation," said the eminent
+counsel, "which bids the dove to fly from the hawk, and the rabbit to
+evade the pursuing hounds, could have induced that delicate, shrinking
+lady to lay bare the horrors of her prison house to the world, and to
+ask, in the name of common humanity, a release from the tyrant, and a
+liberal alimony."
+
+The eminent counsel repeated this flight of fancy in the ear of Mrs.
+Slapman, at the opera that evening, whither she was accompanied by a few
+of the Jigbees, and she smiled, and said that it was really beautiful.
+
+The protracted case--of which we have given a mere sketch--was decided
+by Samuel Goldfinch, Esq., in favor of the lady, a separation was
+decreed, and alimony fixed at six thousand dollars a year, that being
+only a wife's fair proportion of Mr. Slapman's income. Mrs. Slapman,
+with a well-assumed appearance of levity, gave a _grande soiree musicale
+et dramatique_ at her house, in honor of the event, at which Overtop was
+a favored guest. Mr. Slapman went direct to Slapmanville, and raised the
+rent on all his tenants, turned a superannuated non-paying couple into
+the street, and took a general account of his property, to see how much
+he could sell out for, preparatory to leaving for Europe, and so dodging
+the payment of the alimony.
+
+The illustrated papers published two portraits--one of an angel, the
+other of a demon. The angel was Mrs. Slapman: the demon was her husband.
+The comic papers served him up in puns, conundrums, and acrostics, of
+the most satirical import. The daily papers, always on the look out for
+subjects to write about, improved the occasion to overhaul the question
+of divorce, in its statistical, moral, social, and religious bearings.
+Two editors, in pursuance of a previous agreement, continued to discuss
+the question with great warmth in their respective journals, until they
+had written about two hundred octavo pages, when the debate was
+published in book form, with paper covers, and sold for their
+joint benefit.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+HOW OVERTOP SEALED A CONTRACT IN A WAY UNKNOWN TO CHITTY.
+
+The notoriety which Fayette Overtop had derived from his questionable
+connection with the Slapman Divorce case, had (as has been already
+stated) materially contributed to his professional income. By the time
+the case was decided, the firm of Overtop & Maltboy ranked among the
+most successful of the Junior Bar.
+
+Now that Overtop had his hands full of business, his thoughts reverted
+to matrimony more strongly than ever. It is a singular fact, that
+business men find more time to think of marriage, than men of leisure.
+
+Thoughts of matrimony invariably brought Miss Pillbody into Overtop's
+head. He would project mental photographs of her at the top of a table,
+beaming sweetly upon him, opposite, with her dim, lovely eyes, and
+pouring out the tea from a small silver pot. Overtop never could explain
+it; but this imaginary picture realized all his desires of domestic
+happiness.
+
+Overtop not only thought of Miss Pillbody, but, what was more to the
+purpose, he visited her. For this, pretexts were not wanting. They never
+are. At first, he professed to have been requested, by a friend in the
+country, to find a suitable private school for two young daughters. This
+justified several visits, until Miss Pillbody could decide positively
+that it would be impossible for her to take them--an announcement which
+greatly relieved Overtop, though it temporarily put an end to his calls.
+Then he hit upon the expedient of pretending to write an essay on
+Popular Education, for a monthly magazine, and desired to obtain hints
+from her upon the subject. Miss Pillbody, not displeased with the
+compliment, though declaring that she had not an idea to give him, gave
+him a great many good ideas, to which he appeared to listen, while he
+was contemplating her trim figure, and the animated expression of her
+face, and thinking how very well she would look at the head of that
+poetical table behind that phantom teapot. At last the topic of Popular
+Education ran out; and Overtop felt that this kind of imposition could
+not be practised much longer.
+
+One day, while Overtop sat at his desk, with a mass of law papers before
+him, thinking not of them but of his dilemma with respect of Miss
+Pillbody, a small boy brought him a beautifully written little note from
+that lady, asking him to call that evening on business. Overtop sent a
+reply, written with extraordinary care (this is a sign of love), saying
+that he would be happy to call, as requested. At the same time, he felt
+a pang of apprehension that she had found places in her school for the
+two young daughters of his supposititious country friend.
+
+Overtop dressed with unusual care that evening, and presented himself at
+Miss Pillbody's house, punctually at the appointed hour. The young
+teacher was hard at work in the back parlor, setting copy for the
+illiterate wife of a rich city contractor to try her brawny fist on next
+day. Miss Pillbody's bewitching eyeglasses bestrided her nose; and the
+narrow collar, wristbands, and dainty apron with the red-bound pockets,
+looked whiter than ever.
+
+The teacher blushed slightly as Overtop entered, and put away the copy
+book on a high shelf, thereby intimating that she should not work more
+that night, and Overtop could stay as long as he would. Thus, at least,
+that sagacious student of men, women, and things, interpreted it.
+Without a particle of those preliminary commonplaces for which Overtop
+had a cherished aversion, Miss Pillbody broke into business at once.
+
+She said that a Mrs. Cudgeon, the wife of a citizen who had made a large
+fortune in butter and eggs, had been taking lessons in all the English
+branches, and French (here Miss Pillbody smiled), for six months, but
+had postponed payment on one pretext and another, and had finally
+withdrawn from the school, leaving unpaid tuition to the amount of one
+hundred and fifty dollars. Miss Pillbody had written several dunning
+letters to Mrs. Cudgeon, and received no answer. The soft grass of
+epistolary entreaty having failed, Miss P. now proposed to try what
+virtue there was in the hard stones of the law. She had sent to Mr.
+Overtop for advice.
+
+Overtop listened to the statement of the case with professional
+attentiveness. He was sub-thinking, all the time, what an extremely
+sensible woman Miss Pillbody was, not to allow herself to be cheated,
+but to go to law in defence of her rights. He assured his interesting
+client that she could count on his best services, and that she might
+consider the one hundred and fifty dollars as good as recovered. From
+this point the conversation glided off into a wilderness of general
+topics. Overtop had a habit (a bad one, it must be confessed) of
+sounding people's mental depths. He found that Miss Pillbody was no
+shallow thinker. He left the house at eleven o'clock, supposing it was
+ten, and had a delightful vision, that night, of the little round table
+and the teapot, and the presiding angel.
+
+Next day, Overtop wrote the following letter:
+
+     New York,--.
+
+     MR. J. CUDGEON:
+
+     SIR: Enclosed is a bill of items, amounting to one hundred
+     and fifty dollars, for your wife's tuition at Miss
+     Pillbody's private school. Be good enough to look it over,
+     and inform me, to-morrow, what you will do about it. I will
+     tell you candidly, that it is for our interest, as a young
+     law firm, to sue you for the debt; but my client will not
+     consent to this, until all other efforts fail, out of regard
+     to the feelings of Mrs. C.
+
+     Your obedient servant,
+
+     OVERTOP & MALTBOY,
+
+     No ------ Building,
+
+     J. CUDGEON, Esq.
+
+Overtop remembered that one J. Cudgeon had run for the Assembly at the
+previous fall election, and he surmised that, being a politician and a
+public character, J. Cudgeon would not like to see the bill of items in
+print. Overtop reasoned correctly; for, at ten A.M. the following day,
+that gentleman called at the office and paid the one hundred and fifty
+dollars, and said that he was very much obliged to Overtop & Maltboy for
+their gentlemanly conduct in the affair. Mr. Gudgeon had not been aware
+of his wife's pupilage at Miss Pillbody's private school, though he had
+observed (he added, confidentially), for some months past, a slight
+improvement in her grammar. "I am not ashamed to say that we were poor
+once," said Mr. Gudgeon, with a glow of pride.
+
+"When Overtop placed the one hundred and fifty dollars in the white hand
+of the schoolmistress, she looked at him with gratitude and admiration,
+which more than repaid him. Not only this, but she asked him, with not a
+particle of hesitation, how much his fee was.
+
+"Fee!" exclaimed Overtop, a little nettled at the implied insult. (Young
+lawyers are apt to be.) "Nothing, Miss Pillbody; decidedly nothing."
+
+"But I prefer to pay you, Mr. Overtop. Why should you work for me for
+nothing, when I am not willing to do the same thing for Mrs. Gudgeon?
+'The laborer is worthy of his hire,'" she added, laughing. "I set that
+adage in a copy book to-night."
+
+"But I won't take anything," said Overtop, no longer nettled, but
+charmed to perceive this exhibition of sound good sense in a young lady.
+
+"But I insist that you shall," continued Miss Pillbody, pleasantly.
+"Tell me, now, how much it is."
+
+Overtop was standing within two feet of the schoolmistress, and her
+soft, dim eyes were beaming right into his. We leave psychologists to
+settle the phenomenon as they will; but the fact was, that each saw love
+in the eyes of the other. Overtop, in his bachelor musings, had thought
+over a hundred odd methods of putting _the_ question. At this critical
+moment in the history of two hearts, a new form of the proposition
+occurred to him, so original and eccentric, that he determined to
+propound it at once.
+
+He took Miss Pillbody's hand in his, before she knew it. She blushed,
+and would have withdrawn it; but he retained the hand with a
+gentle pressure.
+
+"My dear Miss Pillbody," said Overtop, "I will take five dollars from
+you on one condition, and no other. Will you grant it?"
+
+The schoolmistress, not knowing what she was saying, said "Yes."
+
+"The condition is, that I shall buy an engagement ring, and put it on
+this dear hand."
+
+Miss Pillbody blushed, and cast down her gentle eyes. The sagacious
+young lawyer, interpreting these signs as a full consent, stole his arm
+around her waist, and sealed the contract in a way all unknown
+to Chitty.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+A RETURNED CALIFORNIAN.
+
+At last, Matthew Maltboy was engaged. He had, since twenty, been
+dallying on the edge of a betrothal. Now he had taken the momentous step
+into that anomalous region which lies between celibacy and married
+life, where a man is not exactly a bachelor, nor yet, by any means, a
+husband. It is the land in which the dim enchantments of romance begin
+to assume the plain outlines of reality. It is the land in which the
+pledge of undying affection, breathed, at some rapturous moment, into a
+delicate, inclining ear, becomes invested with awful meaning, and has a
+value in the legal market like a bond and mortgage. It is the land where
+the excitement of pursuit is over, and the game is securely cornered,
+but not yet in hand. It is the spot where the ardent huntsman of Love
+pauses to look back, and ceases to bend his longing gaze into the
+distance beyond.
+
+How it came to pass that the unreliable Matthew Maltboy had become the
+affianced one of the pleasant widow Frump, it is not the purpose of this
+history to record. Let it suffice to say, that the mutual aversion which
+they felt, some months before, at Mr. Whedell's house, on New Year's
+day, was the starting point in their course of true love. Such an
+aversion, subsequently smoothed away, is often the most promising
+beginning of a courtship.
+
+Mrs. Frump had frequently met Matthew on the street, and been gratified
+with his deferential bow. His bulk, to which, as a rotund lady, she had
+taken an antipathy, seemed to dwindle down as it was looked at. Matthew,
+whose ideal was a delicate woman with observable shoulder blades, had
+also, by repeated sights of Mrs. Frump, become reconciled to her ample
+proportions. Meantime, they had heard much, incidentally, of each other
+through Marcus Wilkeson. Matthew had come to esteem Mrs. Frump for her
+affectionate devotion to old Van Quintem; and Mrs. Frump had secretly
+admired the powerful though silent legal ability displayed by Mr.
+Maltboy in the inquisition before Coroner Bullfast.
+
+One night, Matthew, accompanied Marcus to his old friend's house; and,
+on the second night following, this couple were engaged--a happy event,
+which was brought about no less by the widow's experience, and
+conviction that there was no time to lose, than by Matthew's
+impulsive ardor.
+
+He had been engaged ten days; and so entirely had he talked out the time
+to the widow, that it seemed six months.
+
+"Why is it," thought Matthew, stretching himself in his chair, and
+looking critically at the widow, who was knitting crotchet work, "why is
+it that I no longer adore her? She is just as pretty, just as amiable,
+just as affectionate as ever. Now, why don't I care a button for her at
+this moment?" Matthew was not a transcendental philosopher; and the true
+answers to these questions did not come to him.
+
+Old Van Quintem, pale and beautiful in his declining years, sat by the
+window that opened on the green leaves of the back yard, calmly smoking
+his pipe, and thinking, with a holy sadness, of his dead wife and his
+worse-than-dead son. The old gentleman, and the two quiet affianced
+ones, who sat near him, made up a well-dressed and handsome group; the
+pictorial effect of which was suddenly marred by the apparition of a
+stranger in the doorway.
+
+He was tall, muscular, and what little could be seen of his face through
+a heavy growth of whiskers was mild and prepossessing, in spite of two
+large scars just visible below the broad brim of a rough hat. His dress
+was faded and dirty.
+
+The stranger stood in the doorway, and surveyed the occupants of the
+room.
+
+Old Van Quintem looked at the intruder a moment, and then said, as if
+remembering something, "Are you the man sent by Crumley to mend my
+piazza railing?"
+
+There was the least hesitation in the man's voice, as he answered, "Yes,
+sir. I'm here to do that job." His voice was a deep growl, as of a
+grizzly bear half tamed.
+
+"Where are your tools?" asked old Van Quintem.
+
+The stranger communed with himself, and then replied, in the most
+natural manner, "I s'pose I only want a saw, a hammer, and a few nails.
+You have 'em, haven't yer?"
+
+"You're a funny sort of carpenter, to travel without your tools. Do you
+know, now, that you look more like a California miner than a carpenter?"
+
+"That's not very 'markable," returned the stranger, in profound guttural
+accents, "considerin' as how I come from California this week."
+
+"You have brought home tons of gold, I dare say," said old Van Quintem,
+playfully.
+
+"A little," growled the stranger. "The diggins was poor in Calaveras
+County when I fust went there, but latterly they improved."
+
+At the mention of Calaveras County, the widow suddenly fixed her eyes
+upon the stranger, and then dropped them on her crotchet work.
+
+Matthew Maltboy here conceived a happy thought, namely, to ask this
+stranger if he ever knew Amos Frump (the deceased husband of Mrs.
+Frump), who was killed in that very county in an affray growing out of a
+disputed claim, five years before. Mrs. Frump, after her engagement to
+Matthew, had furnished him with slips from three California papers,
+giving full particulars of the sanguinary affair. Before he was engaged,
+he had never felt the slightest curiosity to know the history of his
+predecessor; but, since then, he had entertained a strong secret desire
+to learn more of him, and especially of the reasons which induced him to
+abandon a young and lovely wife, and make a Californian exile of
+himself. Upon this subject the widow had never volunteered any
+satisfactory information, and he had been politely reluctant to ask
+her about it.
+
+Old Van Quintem, who was too sleepy at that time to talk much, procured
+the necessary tools from a cupboard in the kitchen, and showed the
+stranger what work was to be done. The old gentleman then returned to
+his easy chair by the window, threw a handkerchief over his head, and
+settled himself for a nap.
+
+Before the carpenter had struck the first blow, Matthew Maltboy rose,
+remarked to the widow that he wanted to stretch himself a little, and
+walked out upon the piazza.
+
+The carpenter stood near the door, with the saw in one hand and the
+hammer in the other, very much in the attitude of listening. At
+Matthew's approach, he commenced feeling the teeth of the saw, as if to
+test their sharpness.
+
+"I would like to speak a word with you, sir," said Matthew, in a low
+voice, motioning the carpenter to accompany him to a corner of the
+piazza, out of the widow's possible hearing.
+
+Having attained that safe position, Matthew opened the great subject.
+
+"You remarked that you had dug gold in Calaveras County," said he. "Did
+you ever happen to know a man by the name of Frump--Amos Frump--who was
+a miner there?"
+
+"Frump!" replied the carpenter. "He was an intimate friend of mine."
+
+"Now that's lucky," said Matthew, "for I want to find out something
+about the man."
+
+"Then you've come to the right shop," answered the carpenter; "for his
+own brother--if he ever had one--couldn't tell you more about him
+than I."
+
+"I am indeed fortunate. In the first place, then this man Frump is
+really--dead?"
+
+The carpenter pulled his rough hat farther over his forehead, and
+replied:
+
+"As dead as two big splits in the skull could make him. But 'xcuse me,
+sir; he was my bosom friend, and I can't bear to talk of his death."
+
+"He _is_ dead, then, and no mistake," said Matthew, soliloquizing. "Yet
+I am not exactly glad to know it."
+
+The carpenter's face expressed surprise at this remark.
+
+"I beg your pardon," said Matthew. "Of course I am not glad to hear of
+your friend's death. But, to tell the truth," he continued (inventing an
+excuse), "I had always heard that this Frump was a wild fellow; that he
+didn't treat his wife decently, and at last ran away from her. You see I
+am acquainted with the family. In fact, I know Mrs. Frump quite well."
+
+"And did she tell you all this about her dead husband?" asked the
+carpenter.
+
+"Oh, no!" returned Matthew, who began to fear that he had gone too far.
+"She never says anything about his personal character. I only spoke from
+common report."
+
+"Then common report is a common liar; for I know there never was a
+steadier chap than this same Amos Frump; and his wife can't say that he
+ever struck her, or said a cross word to her. Amos told me all about
+himself; and I'd believe him through thick and thin." The carpenter
+spoke in his dismal chest voice, without the least indication of
+excitement.
+
+"Then why did he leave his wife? and why did she never hear of him until
+the time of his death? You will confess that _that_ was odd."
+
+"I give you the reasons," answered the carpenter, "as Amos give 'em to
+me. It seems that _he_ was a poor, uneducated feller. _She_ had a few
+thousand dollars from her grandfather's property, and was sent by her
+parents to the best o' schools. Though he and she were so much unlike,
+they got up a kind o' fondness for each other from the time when Amos
+saved her from bein' run over by a horse. They used to meet each other
+secretly, because, you see, her folks didn't like Amos. They thought
+that a girl with three or four thousand dollars in her own name, ought
+to set her eyes rather above a feller like him. Well, arter no end o'
+trouble, they was married. Her folks pretended to treat Amos all right,
+but was allers talkin' agin him; and finally they pizened her mind with
+the idee that he had married her only for her money, and that all the
+while he loved another gal. She began to treat him very cold like, and,
+one day, when she was in a little bit of temper--"
+
+"Has Mrs. Frump any temper?" asked Matthew, anxiously. "I never saw it."
+
+"But you a'n't her husband," replied the carpenter. "Amos told me that
+she did show a leetle temper now and then. However, he allers said she
+was a pooty good gal in the main. Well, one day, when her dander was up
+about somethin', she told him that she b'lieved he married her for her
+money, and she'd die before he should have a cent. Amos was a proud
+feller, if he _was_ poor; and, when he heerd this, he left the house
+right off, walked to New York, and shipped as a sailor to San Francisco.
+I met him when he fust come to the mines, and, as he was a spry, tough
+chap, I let him work a claim with me on shares. We ate and slept
+together, and many a time, in the dark night, has he spoke to me about
+his wife, and how much he thought of her; but he said he never should go
+back till he had money enough to buy out her and her hull family. We was
+very unlucky, and Amos got downhearted, and took to drink. By and by he
+moved off to another claim, and worked on his own hook. He did better
+there; but all the gold he dug out he used to spend in gamblin' and rum;
+and at last a drunken quarrel put an end to Amos Frump."
+
+"Poor fellow!" said Matthew. "And do you think the widow ever grieved
+for him?"
+
+"No, I guess not; for Amos allers said that she was not a very lovin',
+affectionate woman; though, if he had been as rich as her, or if her
+family had let her alone, she would have made him a tol'able wife."
+
+"Not loving! Not affectionate!" thought Matthew. "And I am about to
+marry her!" A cold shudder crept over him.
+
+Hiding his emotions with an effort, he again interrogated the affable
+carpenter:
+
+"And do you really think that Mr. Frump would have returned, and lived
+again with his wife, if he had become rich?"
+
+"To be sure he would. He couldn't marry anybody else, yer know, without
+committin' bigamy. He allers said he didn't care much whether his wife
+loved him, so long as she treated him civilly."
+
+"Mr. Frump had practical views of married life," suggested Matthew.
+
+"Amos was sensible in some things," said the carpenter. "But he was a
+queer feller, too. He allers had a notion of comin' home kind o'
+disguised, so that his wife shouldn't know him. I used to tell him that
+a few more years in Californy would make him so thin, yaller, and
+grizzly, that he wouldn't need no disguise."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+REVELATIONS OF A LAUGH.
+
+The carpenter here burst out with an extraordinary peal of laughter. It
+was so very peculiar, that, once heard, it would always be identified
+with the person making it. This singular laugh consisted of a brilliant
+stacatto passage on a high key, interrupted by occasional snorts, and
+terminating with a slur which covered the whole descending octave. It
+was also very loud and very long.
+
+It had the effect of bringing Mrs. Frump to the door. She thrust out her
+head, unseen by either the carpenter or Matthew, and looked at the
+former with a wondering air.
+
+"It was an odd idea," said Matthew, laughing slightly out of compliment
+to the carpenter, though he could not understand what there was to
+laugh at.
+
+"And now," continued he, when the carpenter's cachinations had subsided,
+"I will explain to you my motive in asking all these questions. I am
+engaged to Mrs. Frump, and she is now--"
+
+The carpenter immediately broke into another of his remarkable laughs,
+louder and longer than before.
+
+"Well, sir," said Matthew, sarcastically, "when you get through, perhaps
+you will be good enough to tell me what you are laughing about?"
+
+"The idee--ha! ha!--of your--ha! ha!--marrying Mrs.--ha! ha! ha!" and
+the remainder of the sentence was lost in that monstrous laugh.
+
+Matthew, irritated by this most aggravating species of ridicule, took
+the carpenter's measure for a kick--but judiciously refrained from
+fitting him with one.
+
+The second of the carpenter's laughs had made the widow (still
+stealthily looking out of the door) turn pale. The third had inspired
+her with a painful curiosity, which she had determined to gratify, at
+any risk. Before the last laugh, she had, therefore, crept up,
+unobserved, near where Matthew and the carpenter were standing, with
+their backs toward her. Coming around suddenly in front of them, she saw
+the carpenter's mouth wide open, still in the act of laughing, and
+observed that one of his front teeth was out. The widow screamed, and
+fell--into Matthew's arms, nearly flooring him.
+
+"Hold on to her," said the carpenter. "She will come to in a minute."
+
+"Who, sir--who on earth _are_ you?" shouted Matthew, struggling under
+the burdensome widow and a sense of mental bewilderment.
+
+"I am Amos Frump," he replied, in a voice which had suddenly risen five
+notes.
+
+"The widow's husband! The dead come to life!" exclaimed Matthew,
+starting back, and nearly dropping the inanimate form.
+
+Astounded as he was, he did not forget the marital rights of the man
+before him; and he said, with a trembling voice, politely, "I beg your
+pardon; but, as you are this lady's husband, perhaps you had better
+hold her."
+
+"She appears to be doing very well where she is," replied the singularly
+calm Amos Frump. "A moment more, and she will be out of her fainting
+spell. I've seed her very often this way before."
+
+Mr. Frump's prediction was verified; for his lips had scarcely closed on
+the words, when Mrs. Frump opened her eyes, and feebly said, "Is it
+a dream?"
+
+"No, Gusty," replied the composed Amos; "it is a husband come back from
+Californy, with fifty thousand dollars."
+
+"It is--it is my own 'husband's voice!" cried Mrs. Frump, throwing
+herself impulsively out of Matthew's arms upon the patched and faded
+coat of her restored consort.
+
+"I thought you would know the voice," said Amos, "and that's the reason
+I changed it into a growl. This 'ere old Californy suit was a pooty good
+disguise, too. But my confounded laugh betrayed me. I didn't think to
+change that."
+
+The third laugh had roused old Van Quintem from a nice nap, and he came
+out on the piazza.
+
+"Hallo, Mr. Carpenter! what are you doing there?" said he,
+good-naturedly.
+
+A few words from the supposed carpenter defined his position, and threw
+old Van Quintem into the appropriate state of amazement. Looking at the
+shaggy face by a variety of lights, he soon came to recognize it as that
+of his niece's husband, whom he had seen a few times on his yearly
+visits to the country, before his farming brother, Nicholas Van Quintem,
+father of Mrs. Frump, had died.
+
+"From the way Gusty hangs to you, I judge you are no ghost," said old
+Van Quintem, when he had partly recovered his senses.
+
+"No more than I am a carpenter," was the dry response.
+
+"But how does it happen that you are no ghost?" asked old Van Quintem,
+with fearful interest.
+
+This was what everybody wanted to know; and so Mr. Frump, supporting his
+wife by the waist, while she, apparently half stupefied, reposed her
+head on his shoulder, explained the mystery of his appearance. He had
+been severely injured in a drunken quarrel about a claim--he would not
+deny _that_; and, taking off his broad-brimmed hat, he showed the two
+deep scars extending from his eyebrows to the roots of his hair. He was
+left on the ground for dead, and his assailants ran away. The
+enterprising correspondent of three San Francisco papers saw him when he
+was first found, and, learning that he would undoubtedly die, the
+enterprising correspondent regarded him as already sufficiently dead for
+newspaper purposes, and sent three thrilling accounts of his butchery,
+written up with ingenious variations, to the three journals of which he
+was the indefatigable "special." In a few days, the nearly murdered man
+was out of danger. On learning that the news of his death had already
+been sent to the papers, the singular idea came into his mind to let the
+report go uncontradicted, change his name, give up drinking, move away
+to some place where he was not known, and begin his miner's life over
+again. The special correspondent, on being consulted by him, assured Mr.
+Frump that he could depend on his (the correspondent's) silence, since
+it was his invariable practice never to take back or qualify any
+statement made by him--such a course being obviously fatal to his
+hard-earned reputation for accuracy. The correspondent also very
+obligingly supplied him with copies of the papers containing the
+circumstantial accounts of his death, which he directed in a disguised
+hand, and sent through the mail to his wife. He had then assumed another
+name, gone into Benicia County, was successful in gold digging, and,
+after making about two thousand dollars, had taken up his residence in
+the nearest village (undesignated), and had invested his money in
+speculations (kind not particularized). Fortune followed him, but he
+found it convenient, for certain reasons (not given), to move away to
+another village, in a few months. In fact, he had, within four years,
+made the entire circuit of California, never staying in one place more
+than a quarter of a year.
+
+"I don't want to brag," said Mr. Frump, "but it is well enough to have
+it understood that I made my pile."
+
+Mr. Frump nodded his head quietly, as one who does not lie.
+
+Old Van Quintem had hitherto hesitated to congratulate Mrs. Frump upon
+the reacquisition of her husband. He now advanced, and shook her warmly
+by the hand.
+
+"I wish you joy," said he. "And you too, Mr. Frump. I never had the
+pleasure of meeting you often, though I had frequently heard of you.
+With regard to those unpleasant family difficulties in which you became
+involved, they are now at an end; for Gusty's parents are both dead, and
+the old house and farm are sold. Let bygones be bygones."
+
+"So say I, Mr. Van Quintem," said Mr. Frump, grasping the extended hand.
+"As for my wife's relatives, I'm sure I allers forgave 'em. As for the
+old house and farm, if you like, Gusty, we'll buy it back agin."
+
+Mrs. Frump, still resting on her husband's shoulder, sobbed a little,
+and clung closer about him.
+
+"Here is one friend of the family," continued Amos, in his pleasantest
+manner, pointing to Matthew, "whom I don't know by name, though we've
+scraped an off-hand 'quaintance."
+
+"Mr. Frump--Matthew Maltboy, Esq.," said old Van Quintem.
+
+Matthew, like Mrs. Frump, had fully appreciated the awkwardness of his
+situation, and had kept a rigid silence since the returned Californian
+resumed possession of his wife. The minute after Mr. Frump's identity
+had been established, Matthew could have hugged him with ecstasy. But,
+having lost the widow, his fickle mind straightway began to discover in
+her a great many excellencies that he had never seen before. Therefore,
+when he submitted his hand to the grip of Mr. Frump, his face expressed
+a strangely mingled joy and regret.
+
+"I like you," said Mr. Frump, "and, as soon as wifey and I commence
+housekeepin' agin, I'll expect lots o' visits from you. Whenever I'm not
+at home, wifey'll make everything comfortable. Won't you, dear?"
+
+"If you wish it," replied Mrs. Frump, looking up into his face, which
+was not a repulsive one, "for your word shall always be my law."
+
+"I must say," said Matthew, his face exhibiting unqualified admiration
+for Mr. Frump, "that you are the most generous man I ever met. And, if
+Mrs. Frump will promise to introduce me to some nice young woman, that
+she could recommend for a wife, perhaps I'll accept your invitation."
+
+"I'll get you a wife in less than a week," said Mrs. F., who was
+rejoiced that the interview between her recovered husband and late
+suitor had ended peacefully.
+
+"But one thing you haven't yet explained, Amos," said old Van Quintem.
+"How did you get into Crumley's employment?"
+
+"Bless your innocent heart, I am not! I arrived this mornin', in the
+steamer----, straight from Aspinwall, with this old scarecrow suit on,
+jest as you see me now. I was intendin' to take the railroad for Tioga
+County, and play off a leetle surprise on Gusty, and her relations up
+there. But, before goin', it 'curred to me to call on a Mr. Lambkin, who
+was raised in Tioga, and keeps a grocery store in the lower part of
+Washington street. I found Mr. Lambkin in, and he told me as how,
+accordin' to last accounts, Gusty was stayin' with her uncle Van
+Quintem. I knowed your address, and come up here short metre. I was
+goin' to pretend that I was a man in search of work, and trust to luck
+to get a sight of Gusty. I found your front door open, and walked
+through the entry to the back parlor, where you fust see me standin'.
+Afore I could ask you for any work, you wanted to know if I hadn't been
+sent to mend your piazza railing. It was easy to say 'Yes,' and I
+said it."
+
+"And very well you carried out the joke, Amos," said old Van Quintem.
+"You wouldn't make a bad actor."
+
+"Rather better actor than carpenter, I guess," said Mr. Frump.
+
+"Perhaps so," said old Van Quintem; "but a financier of your talent
+needn't act, or mend railings, for a living. I should like to know, now,
+how you made your money in California. Nine out of ten who go there,
+come back poorer than they went."
+
+"'Tisn't best to ask too many questions of a returned Californian,"
+answered Amos, in perfect good humor.
+
+"Nor of anybody else, about business matters. You are right," added old
+Van Quintem.
+
+"I say to wifey, and to all my friends, 'Let bygones be bygones. Take
+me as you find me, and I'll take you as I find you; and we'll ax no
+questions on either side.'"
+
+"Dear Amos, you are the best of husbands!" said Mrs. Frump, looking
+fondly in his face. Mr. Frump improved as he was looked at.
+
+"Let bygones be bygones' is a very good rule," said old Van Quintem.
+
+"Mr. Frump," said Matthew, unable longer to repress the compliment, "you
+have a wonderful amount of good sense!"
+
+"I told you," was the laughing reply, "that 'Amos was sensible in some
+things.'"
+
+
+
+BOOK THIRTEENTH
+
+THE STRANGE LADY.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+A STORY OF THE PAST.
+
+Another year slipped away, and wrought many changes among the
+inhabitants of the block. Some of them had passed from stately mansions
+to those narrow houses which are appointed for all the living. Others
+had wedded, and moved to other blocks which were to be their future
+homes--till the 1st of the following May. Some of them had grown rich by
+quick speculations, and got into the choicest society by the simple
+manoeuvre of taking a four-story brownstone front in the avenue which
+formed the eastern boundary of the block. Others had attained to poverty
+by the same process, and had migrated to cheaper lodgings in blocks
+remote, expecting that a lucky turn of Fortune's wheel would bring them
+back to fashionable life next year, as it most likely would. The
+principal personages of this history had been radically affected by this
+lapse of time--as will hereafter be shown--with the single exception of
+Marcus Wilkeson.
+
+For one year, life had passed tranquilly, uneventfully. He had sought,
+and found, in his dear books, a panacea for that sickness of the heart
+which sometimes attacked him in his lonelier hours. At such, times, he
+would repeat to himself these expressive lines of an old poet:
+
+     This books can do; nor this alone; they give
+     New views of life, and teach us how to live;
+     The grieved they soothe, the stubborn they chastise;
+     Fools they admonish, and confirm the wise.
+     Their aid they yield to all; they never shun
+     The man of sorrow, or the wretch undone.
+     Unlike the hard, the selfish, and the proud,
+     They fly not sullen from the suppliant crowd,
+     Nor tell to various people various things,
+     But show to subjects what they show to kings.
+
+The end of the quiet, sad (but not unpleasantly sad) twelve months found
+Marcus, on a bright morning in the month of August, sitting at his
+window, with a favorite book on his knees, looking--where he should not
+have looked so much--at that window in the old house where the only
+tragedy of his life had been wrought. As he gazed, like one fascinated
+by a spell, his features lengthened, and the habitually melancholy
+expression of his face became deepened and confirmed.
+
+So wrapt was he in these unhappy self-communings, that he did not hear a
+vigorous "rat-tat-tat" on the door of the little back parlor. A
+repetition of the performance aroused him, and to his call, "Come in,"
+Mash, the cook, presented herself.
+
+"A woman at the door wishes to speak to you, sir, on important business,
+she says. Shall I show her in, sir?" Mash laid stress on the word
+"woman," in retaliation for the somewhat peremptory way in which the
+person in question had accosted her at the door. The "Buttery and the
+Boudoir--a Tale of Real Life," afforded her a precedent on this point.
+
+"Show in the lady," said Marcus, wondering who she could be.
+
+A tall, shapely person, dressed in deep black, and wearing a thick veil,
+was ushered into the room. She bowed slightly, and took a seat which
+Marcus offered her, near the window, and then looked significantly at
+Mash, who lingered in an uncertain way about the door.
+
+"You may shut the door, Mash," said Marcus; and Mash did so with a
+little slam, intended to pierce the heart of the mysterious woman in
+black, for whom that domestic had, in one minute, conceived a
+mortal dislike.
+
+The strange woman drew back her veil, and revealed a thin, pale face,
+which might have been handsome twenty years back. "Do you remember
+having seen me before?"
+
+Marcus looked into the thin face with polite scrutiny. "Yes, madam,"
+said he, at length. "I think I saw you on a railway train in New Jersey,
+over a year ago; and also in the town of--, in that State, on the
+evening of a certain unfortunate exhibition. But you are changed, in
+some respects, since then."
+
+"You would say that I am paler and thinner; and I am here to tell you
+why I am, and also to make all the atonement in my power for a crime
+that I have committed."
+
+Marcus Wilkeson's first thought was of the unfathomed murder. His
+startled face expressed what was passing through his mind.
+
+The strange woman read his thoughts. "The crime to which I refer is not
+the murder of Mr. Minford; of which, I may here say, I believed, from
+the first, that you were entirely innocent. Crimes--of that character,
+at least--have never been known in your family."
+
+"All that you say, taken in connection with some curious circumstances
+which occurred on that railway ride, and that memorable night in New
+Jersey," said Marcus, "make me intensely anxious to hear what you have
+to tell. Please impart the information at once, and fully. I call Heaven
+to witness, that your name, your history, the secret which you are to
+reveal, shall pass with me to the grave, if you desire it."
+
+"I accept your offer," said she, with emotion, "though my crime is so
+flagrant that no publicity, no punishment would be too great for it.
+Still, as full justice can be done, and reparation made, without this
+public disgrace, I prefer that my identity should be unknown except to
+you. I think that I have but few months to live." The woman expelled a
+hacking cough.
+
+"My story must be short," said she, "and suited to my strength and this
+cough. You probably remember Lucy Anserhoff, who was a little playmate
+of yours in your native village? I see, by your nod, that you do. I
+am--she. You may well look surprised, for there is little in my haggard
+face and wasted form to recall that once innocent girl. You remember, I
+presume, my engagement to your brother Aurelius--excuse my faltering,
+sir, for, even at this distance of time, I cannot speak of your dead
+brother without emotion. It is not necessary to recall to your memory
+the details of your brother's conduct to me, and how he afterward
+married--another--and moved to this city. This early portion of my
+unfortunate career is well known to you, as it was to all the people of
+our little village."
+
+Here the strange visitor paused, and coughed. The cough was dry and
+hollow.
+
+She continued: "I think I may say that I was amiable and good enough, as
+a child. But your brother's desertion changed my whole nature. I dwelt
+upon one thought--revenge. I shudder as I confess it, but, for months, I
+meditated taking the life of the man who had wronged me. I came to this
+city twice, and lay in wait for him; but my heart faltered, and, thank
+God! I did not commit that crime. Soon, Heaven interposed--so it seemed
+to me at that wicked time--to help on my work of vengeance. Your
+brother's wife died, giving birth to a female child. I used to ride into
+the city twice a week regularly after this, and watch for him near his
+place of business, that I might gloat on his pale, unhappy face. I see
+the look of horror with which you receive this part of my confession;
+but you will bear in mind, sir, that I am hero to tell the truth,
+concealing nothing. You remember, sir, the old lines about a woman
+scorned? I, sir, can bear witness to their awful truth."
+
+Another fit of coughing here interrupted her. At length she resumed, in
+a feebler voice: "I must hasten while I can talk at all. One day, while
+I was watching near your brother's house for his appearance, the door
+opened, and a servant appeared, with a child in her arms--his child. The
+servant walked down the street, and I followed her, unobserved, until
+she came to Washington Parade Ground. She entered the park, and took a
+seat near the fountain. I sat down on a bench near her. It was not long
+before I made the girl's acquaintance, and had the child in my arms,
+caressing it with well-counterfeited kindness. Suddenly, the girl
+recollected that she had left the street door of the house unlocked, and
+was afraid that the house, having not a soul in it, would be robbed
+during her absence. She was so much troubled about it, that she asked me
+to hold the child--then about a year old--until she could go and lock up
+the house, and return. A horrible suggestion came into my mind, and I
+took the child in my arms. The servant was no sooner out of my sight,
+than I rose, and, clasping the child tightly, walked rapidly in the
+opposite direction. When I had got out of the park, among the side
+streets near North River, I ran until I was tired, turning at every
+corner, to avoid pursuit. My plan was clear from the moment that the
+child was left in my charge. It was, to give her into the keeping of
+some stranger, and so rob the widowed father of his only child. It was a
+scheme worthy of the lost and wretched woman that I then was."
+
+A fit of coughing here set in, interrupting the narrative for several
+minutes. Marcus offered his strange guest a glass of water. She sipped
+it, until her cough was checked.
+
+"I wished to make a full and minute statement, sir; but this cough again
+warns me to be very brief. In a word, then, I had not gone far, before I
+saw a German woman--a neat, elderly person--sitting on the stoop of her
+house. An impulse moved me to leave the child with her. I accosted her,
+but she answered me in German, saying that she could not speak English.
+Hardly knowing what I did, I mounted the steps, and placed the child in
+her arms, first kissing it. Then I tossed my pocket book, containing
+about twenty dollars, into her lap, and, without another word or act,
+ran off again. As I drew near the next corner, I turned, and saw the
+German woman still sitting on the stoop, looking at the child, and then
+at the money, and then at my flying form, in perfect amazement.
+
+"Well, I returned to my country home in safety. Next day, I saw in the
+New York papers a reward of five hundred dollars for the recovery of the
+child, and the same amount for the arrest of the woman who stole it. My
+person was described, according to the recollection of the servant, but
+so imperfectly that I could not be identified. In two weeks I visited
+the city again, found the house where I had left the child--for I had
+remembered, even in my haste, the street and the number. The poor little
+thing was well, and had learned to love its new mother, who, in turn,
+seemed to love it as well as her own two children. I kissed the child,
+left more money with the German woman, and fled again to my home. These
+visits I repeated from week to week for six months, without detection.
+The German woman supposed that I was the mother of the child, but knew
+there was a secret, and did not seek to disturb it. At the end of the
+six months, your--your--brother died." (There was here a slight quaver
+in her voice, almost instantly passing away.) "Soon after this, my
+mother died, and the last of our family estate was spent on her burial."
+(Another tremor in the voice, but brief. The woman seemed to have
+perfect control of her feelings.)
+
+"Fortunately, I was qualified to earn my living as a seamstress. I went
+to the city, advertised for such a place, and obtained it. I visited the
+child secretly, sometimes, and left money for its support and clothing.
+But the idea of detection and exposure troubled me greatly. One day, I
+read an advertisement from a married couple who had no children,
+offering to adopt a girl under two years of age. I answered the
+advertisement, and thus became acquainted with--"
+
+"I anticipate the disclosure," said Marcus. "Mr. Minford! And the poor,
+dear child is my niece. Heaven be praised, she is found at last!"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+POSSIBLE LOVE.
+
+"You have guessed rightly. Miss Minford is your niece. The proofs will
+be found in this packet. They are articles of clothing, taken from the
+child as fast as new ones were supplied, to prevent its identification,
+bearing the initials of Helen Wilkeson. I preserved them, with the vague
+idea of benefiting her by them, some day. I have seen the child by
+stealth a few times since I gave her to Mr. and Mrs. Minford, but never
+called at their house. It was agreed between us that I should never make
+myself known as the child's mother, and that they should never seek to
+learn my name and history. I acted as seamstress in several families in
+this city, until, about five years ago, I obtained an engagement in a
+family in New Jersey, living in the very town where that unlucky
+panorama was exhibited. It happened, as you know, that you and I rode in
+the same car from New York, where I had been on a shopping excursion. I
+recognized and was profoundly impressed with your resemblance to your
+brother. Learning that you were connected with the panorama, I attended
+the exhibition, that I might observe you more closely. There you were
+arrested on the charge of murdering Mr. Minford--of which, I again say,
+I always believed that you were totally innocent. You may remember that
+a woman fainted away. I was she. The sudden recollection of those two
+names--Wilkeson and Minford--in such a connection, was too much even for
+my nerves. I read the trial with fearful interest, and rejoiced in your
+release from the accusation. Providence at last seemed to point out the
+way to make all the reparation for my crime. I should have done it
+immediately after your acquittal, had I not seen by the papers that a
+wealthy lady--Mrs. Crull--had given your niece a home in her family. I
+postponed this act of justice from one week to another, until my failing
+health warned me that it could not be put off with safety longer. I
+thank Heaven that I have had strength and resolution to do it at last."
+
+"This act of atonement, madam," said Marcus, "entitles you to my respect
+and sympathy. If you ever need a friend, I trust you will do me the
+favor of calling on me."
+
+"I thank you," she replied; "but I have means enough to support me for
+the remainder of my days, which are numbered. The family in which I
+live, little knowing my true history, are very kind to me."
+
+The protracted conversation had not been closed too soon. A violent
+cough seized upon the poor woman's frame, and shook it like a leaf. When
+it had ceased, Marcus observed that her lips were streaked with blood.
+
+He begged to send for a doctor, but she would not have one, and rose to
+take her leave.
+
+Marcus insisted, however, upon ordering a carriage for her conveyance to
+the New Jersey Railroad Depot, and she at length consented to receive
+that kindness from him.
+
+To the driver he whispered words of caution, and instructed him to take
+the lady to a physician, in case she was ill on the journey; and, if so,
+to report, immediately thereafter, to him. He then shook her hand
+frankly, and begged her again to remember that he should always be
+her friend.
+
+She smiled sadly, as she replied: "Again and again I thank you, sir; but
+it is useless to accept your kind offers, for we are meeting for the
+last time."
+
+The carriage was driven slowly away.
+
+The poor woman's word's were true; and Marcus never saw her more.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III
+
+UNCLE AND NIECE.
+
+Marcus Wilkeson had seen Pet but twice since the inquest--once in Mrs.
+Crull's carriage, and once afoot, on the opposite side of the street. He
+was delicately conscious that she regarded him with distrust or
+aversion; and, raising his hat politely to her, bowed, and passed on. He
+had expressly enjoined upon Tiffles and Overtop, in the communications
+which they had with her relative to the "Cosmopolitan Window Fastener,"
+not to mention his name. He shrank from appearing to force himself on
+her notice.
+
+The discovery of her real parentage had modified Marcus's sensitiveness
+somewhat. He was now no longer in the ridiculous position of a
+middle-aged, hopeless lover, but was an uncle, with a charming niece
+whom he could honorably love like a father. His first impulse, after the
+departure of the mysterious woman, was to hurry around to Mrs. Crull's
+house, unpack his bundle of proofs, and embrace the dear child with
+avuncular affection.
+
+Upon him, glowing with this impulse, came the calm, deep Overtop, to
+whom Marcus told the strange story. Overtop listened with lawyer-like
+composure, and, when Marcus had finished, asked for the bundle. "The
+story is likely enough," said he, "but a lawyer wants to know all
+the proofs."
+
+So saying, he removed from the parcel the string which bound it, and
+which, with the wrapping cloth, had become yellow with age, and brought
+to view a baby's long frock, and a cap made of the finest materials, and
+heavily fringed with lace, and a pair of tarnished golden morocco shoes
+of fairy dimensions. Upon an edge of the dress were daintily wrought, in
+needle work, the initials, H.W. A separate package contained extracts
+from three daily papers, giving accounts of the "Mysterious
+Disappearance of a Child," and an advertisement, signed Aurelius
+Wilkeson, offering five hundred dollars for the recovery of his
+daughter Helen, and describing the circumstances of the abduction so far
+as they were known, and the articles of dress which the infant wore
+at the time.
+
+"So far, so good," said Overtop; "but it now remains to identify the
+original owner of these baby clothes with Miss Minford. We must find
+some old friends or acquaintances of the late inventor, who can testify
+that he adopted a child during the year 18--."
+
+Marcus, whose memory was tenacious of names, recollected that Mr.
+Minford, in his few confidential moments, had told him of several
+persons whom he had known in more prosperous days.
+
+With these memoranda to guide him, Overtop went resolutely to work, and,
+in two days, found four old friends of Mr. and Mrs. Minford, who
+remembered the very year when they adopted an infant child. It was the
+same year that the daughter of Aurelius Wilkeson had disappeared.
+Overtop, being a Notary Public, took the affidavits of these persons as
+he went along.
+
+Here Overtop would have stopped, and left Marcus to break the important
+news of his new-found relationship to the young lady. But Marcus, who
+had a perfect horror of scenes, begged his friend to do this troublesome
+piece of diplomacy for him, but promised, when it was done, to appear at
+Mrs. Crull's in his new character of uncle.
+
+Overtop performed the difficult task with success. He found Pet not
+altogether unprepared for the discovery. She recalled to mind several
+conversations and significant glances between Mr. and Mrs. Minford (the
+latter died in Pet's twelfth year), in which there was an evident
+allusion to the mystery of her birth. She remembered how often persons
+had expressed surprise that she did not resemble her supposed father or
+mother in the least. She remembered that, on those occasions, Mrs.
+Minford had been much disconcerted; and Mr. Minford, remarking that it
+was a freak of nature, he presumed, had always seemed desirous of
+changing the subject. She remembered that this strange want of
+resemblance to either of her reputed parents had often been a puzzle to
+her before Mrs. Minford's death.
+
+With regard to Lucy Anserhoff, and the causes which prompted her to the
+abduction of the child. Overtop said nothing; because, among other
+reasons, Marcus, true to his solemn pledge, had told him nothing. He
+explained that the crime had been committed by a person who had formerly
+been a servant in her father's family; and that she had made full
+confession to her uncle, only on condition that her name should never be
+mentioned to any human being.
+
+Mrs. Crull, who to a practical mind united a love of the romantic and
+marvellous, accepted Overtop's proofs even more readily than Pet. She
+said she had observed, at the inquest, a wonderful resemblance between
+Mr. Wilkeson and her darling, especially in the nose and eyes. Overtop,
+being appealed to to mark the likeness, took an oracular three-quarters
+view of the young lady, and said that the word "niece" was written
+on her face.
+
+"He's your uncle, my dear," said Mrs. Crull. "There a'n't no doubt o'
+that. But don't forget that I'm your mother, now."
+
+Pet kissed Mrs. Crull, and placed her little hand confidingly in the
+large, ineradicably red hand of her protectress.
+
+"Now that Marcus Wilkeson stands in the relation of uncle to you," said
+Overtop, "there is no harm in telling you something." He then broke to
+her the secret of her uncle's important aid in the affair of the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener"--the sole credit of which had always been
+attributed by Pet and Mrs. Crull to Wesley Tiffles and Overtop,
+agreeably to the wish of Marcus.
+
+"What a fool I've been," said Mrs. Crull, "to feel the least doubt about
+this excellent man! It was very weak of me, I s'pose, Mr. Overtop; but I
+don't mind tellin' you, that, after what had 'curred, I thought that Mr.
+Wilkeson's quaintance with Pet had better be stopped. I take all the
+'sponsibility of it. We must make it up, by thinkin' all the more
+of him now."
+
+At the suggestion of Overtop, a servant, with Mrs. Crull's carriage, was
+now sent for Marcus, and soon returned with him.
+
+When he entered the room, Pet rose, and walked toward him, half
+hesitating. Her face was very pale, and her lips quivered. "My dear
+uncle!" she said, and turned her sweet face up to be kissed.
+
+Marcus, to whom the probable character of his reception had been a
+distressing subject of conjecture, was delighted at this frank,
+affectionate greeting, and stooped and imprinted an uncle's kiss on the
+young girl's brow. It was a pleasant way out of an embarrassment.
+
+The conflicting emotions of the hour were too much for Pet; and she
+tottered to Mrs. Crull's arms, and wept for a few moments.
+
+"You are her uncle, Mr. Wilkeson," said Mrs. Crull, extending her red
+right hand, while, with her left, she smoothed Pet's thick brown hair,
+"but I am her mother." Mrs. Crull seized upon this early opportunity to
+give notice that her rights as adopted parent were not to be abridged.
+
+"And happy she is in having such a mother, my dear Mrs. Crull," said
+Marcus.
+
+A quick ring, as of a familiar visitor, was heard at the door. The
+servant ushered in Bog. He was much changed since his last presentation
+to the reader. Six months of worldly polish, of private tutoring, and of
+a strong desire to appear well in the eyes of one he loved, had turned
+the clumsy boy into the quiet but stylish young gentleman. He had given
+up the bill-posting business, not because he was sick of it, or ashamed
+of it, but because old Van Quintem loved his adopted son so well, that
+he could not spare him from his side. Bog passed the greater portion of
+every day with him, rambling through the streets, or riding to the
+suburbs in the old family carriage, or reading the dear old books to
+him. Bog read well now, and had learned to love those repositories of
+wit and wisdom with almost as keen a relish as the venerable
+white-headed listener. This was another bond of affection between the
+old gentleman and himself.
+
+At Bog's entrance. Pet looked up, and showed the sparkling tears in her
+eyes. A deep shade of anxiety passed over the young man's face, and he
+looked around for an explanation.
+
+The prompt Overtop was ready to give it; and, in a few moments, Bog was
+enlightened with the great discovery.
+
+"And Pet has been crying a little because she is so happy--that's all,"
+added Mrs. Crull. "Sit down here, Bog."
+
+Mrs. Crull made room for him on the other end of the sofa where she was
+sitting--her left hand still smoothing the soft brown hair of her
+adopted child.
+
+Bog took the seat, and smiled across the good lady's broad figure to
+Pet, who smiled back at him again.
+
+This expressive exchange of glances was not lost on Marcus. He instantly
+saw, what he had not divined before, that the devotion, the
+self-sacrifice, the constant, unswerving love of the boy, had at last
+sounded its echo in the bosom of the maiden. As he swiftly contrasted
+the manly, athletic figure of the young man, with the delicate beauty of
+his niece, he thought how well they were adapted to each other; and
+wondered that he could ever have been so blind and conceited as to
+suppose that a nervous old bachelor like himself could win the heart of
+that fresh and youthful image of loveliness. And how thankful he then
+was that he had never, by a single word, hinted at the mad love which he
+once felt for her.
+
+He had no cause to blush now!
+
+
+
+BOOK FOURTEENTH.
+
+HAPPY DAYS.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+OWNERS OF THE BEAUTIFUL.
+
+The world and all its inhabitants had rolled round to another fragrant
+spring. The buds were bursting in city parks and gardens, and birds
+twittered in the dusty air. Every happy heart said to itself, "This
+green, and these opening roses, this music of the birds, this shining
+day, this temperate breeze, are all mine, and made for me."
+
+There were two young persons, one sweet morning in May, who experienced
+a delightful sense of that universal proprietorship of the Beautiful.
+They were a couple who appeared to be expressly made for each other; for
+the young man was tall and broad chested, the young woman short, and
+delicately formed; his eyes were black, hers blue; he was calm,
+resolute, deliberate in every movement, she quick and impulsive. There
+never was a clearer case of mutual fitness by virtue of entire
+dissimilarity.
+
+Any one could see that they loved each other, and that, if they were not
+married, they were engaged--for her little hand was entwined most
+trustingly about his muscular arm, and she leaned toward him with that
+gentle inclination which seems to be a magnetism of the heart.
+
+"Are you happy, my own Pet?" asked the young man, looking proudly down
+at the beautiful face beside him.
+
+"Happy! dear Bog--for I _will_ always call you Bog. You know I am!" Her
+blue eyes filled with tears.
+
+If excess of happiness had not choked her voice, she would have asked
+Bog if he thought she could be other than perfectly happy in the love of
+her adopted mother, in the love of her dear uncle--who was at once a
+father and brother in his tender solicitudes--in the love of that
+darling old gentleman, Myndert Van Quintem, and in one other love, which
+it was not necessary to mention.
+
+But Bog knew that she was supremely happy, and he needed no such
+elaborate answer. He also knew that he possessed the first, fresh, and
+only love that she had ever cherished. All the events in connection with
+her Greenpoint adventure, both before and after it, proved that she had
+never loved young Van Quintem, and that her sentiments toward him were
+only those of gratitude for his supposed saving of her life, and an
+innocent, childlike confidence in his good intentions.
+
+The lovers sauntered down the street slowly, as if they would protract
+the walk. Not another word was said. Passing a garden full of roses, Bog
+reached through the fence, and plucked a full-blown white one and handed
+it to Pet. She eagerly took it, and pinned it to the bosom of her dress.
+
+"Here we are, dearest; and I am almost ashamed to show myself to uncle,
+for I am such a stranger," said Bog, breaking the silence, as they stood
+at the foot of the memorable bell tower. "Hallo, Uncle Ith!" he shouted,
+looking upward.
+
+The old gentleman thrust his white head out of an open window at the
+top, and said, "All right. Come up."
+
+The door at the foot of the tower was open, and the young couple
+proceeded to comply with the invitation. Bog led the way, and gently
+dragged Pet from step to step, with much laughter on his part, and many
+charming little feminine screams on her party until the trap door was
+reached. Uncle Ith had combed his hair with his five fingers, retied
+his old black cravat, and put on his coat, to receive them. He smiled
+through the trap door, as they came in sight, and said, "Be very careful
+of the young lady, Bog. Mind, now, how the young lady steps."
+
+Bog jumped through the trap door into the cupola. Then he lowered a hand
+to Pet, and Uncle Ith lent her the same assistance, and the two raised
+the precious burden to a place of safety. Uncle Ith, after he had been
+introduced to Pet, proudly, by his nephew, looked at her for a moment in
+silent admiration. He had never seen her before, but he knew her well
+from Bog's descriptions (hurriedly communicated by Bog when they had met
+in the street), and said to himself that the boy had done no more than
+justice to her rare beauty.
+
+Then Uncle Ith looked at his nephew. "Ah, Bog," said he, shaking his
+head at him, "what changes Time does make! It seems only a few days ago
+that you was a little scrub of a chap, runnin' 'round town and pickin'
+up your livin'. And a very good and honest livin' you picked up, too.
+Now, here you are, a nicely dressed, tall, handsome young man, with a
+snug little fortun' all of your own earnin', not to mention your bein'
+the adopted son of that splendid old gentleman, Myndert Van Quintem.
+And, last and best, you are goin' to be married to this dear young lady
+to-morrer."
+
+Pet blushed; and Bog said, "That is why we are here to-day, dear uncle.
+We must have you at the wedding."
+
+Uncle Ith faltered. "Me at Mr. Van Quintem's! I should feel like a fish
+out o' water." He said nothing about the antiquated blue coat with brass
+buttons, the short, black trousers, and the figured satin vest, hanging
+up in a closet at home; but he thought of them, and what a stiff figure
+he would cut in them.
+
+"But you must come, Uncle Ith!" said Pet, with her sweetest smile. "I
+ask it as a particular favor."
+
+"You are my only living relative, you know, uncle," added Bog.
+
+"We should not be happy, if you were away," said Pet, placing her hand
+confidingly on the old man's shoulder. Young persons always took to the
+good old man in this spontaneous way.
+
+The entreaties of the couple, and the continual iteration of that name
+by which he loved to be called--"Uncle Ith"--finally overcame his
+objections. He reconciled himself to the prospect of the blue coat,
+short trousers, and gaudy vest, and solemnly promised to attend
+the wedding.
+
+This important matter having been settled, Uncle Ith pointed out to Pet
+all the interesting objects to be seen from the tower, and adjusted the
+spyglass for her, and gave her near views of Governor's Island, the
+Palisades, and other remote objects. He also explained to her the
+process of striking the bell by means of the long iron lever, and told
+her that, if she would wait there long enough, she could hear how the
+big chap sounded ten feet away. Pet put her hands to her ears, in
+anticipation of the stunning noise, and laughingly said that she didn't
+think she would wait long.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+THE LAST OF A MYSTERY.
+
+After Pet had looked at all the objects of interest visible from the
+bell tower--Uncle Ith pointing them out with the pride of an owner--Bog
+called Pet aside, and said, "Now, Uncle Ith, I have something to show
+her that I used to think most interesting of all."
+
+Pet rested her hand upon his arm, and gazed through the southeastern
+window, in the direction indicated by Bog's forefinger.
+
+"Right there," said he, "midway between those two tall chimneys, and a
+trifle south of the line of that steeple--the last two windows in the
+upper story of that old house--do you see them?"
+
+Pet looked along his outstretched arm, to get the precise direction,
+and then said, hurriedly, "It is my old home."
+
+The sight of those familiar windows, in which the calico curtains still
+hung, recalled the horrid vision of that dreadful night. Pet turned
+pale, and shuddered. "Let us look elsewhere, Bog," said she.
+
+"I beg your pardon, dearest; but I wanted to tell you how many hours I
+had spent in this cupola, day and night, gazing at those two windows,
+and feeling, oh, so happy! if I could but catch a glimpse of you or your
+shadow. But I never told Uncle Ith about it."
+
+Uncle Ith had not overheard this conversation, but he had followed with
+his eyes the direction pointed out by Bog. As the young couple stepped
+back from the window, he said:
+
+"I see some strange sights occasionally, my children" (he was fond of
+calling young people his children), "I can tell you. There are a couple
+of windows, in the upper story of that old brick house, between the two
+big chimneys, that used to interest me some."
+
+"We see them," said Bog and Pet.
+
+"About five years back, I began to notice lights burnin' in that room,
+long after all other lights, except the street lamps, was put out. Of
+course, this attracted my attention, and I used to feel a queer kind of
+pleasure in looking into the room with my spyglass, and wonderin' what
+was goin' on there. The curtains were usually drawn over the lower
+sashes; but, this tower bein' fifty or sixty feet higher than the house,
+I could look over the top of the curtains, and see somethin'. An old
+man, tall and slim, and a young girl, 'peared to be the only folks that
+lived there. Are you sick, young lady?" said he, observing that Pet
+looked pale.
+
+"Oh, no; I am not sick--only a little fatigued."
+
+"What a brute I was, not to offer you a chair! Now do sit down, young
+lady."
+
+Pet did so, and Uncle Ith resumed:
+
+"The old gentleman was a machinist, I s'pose, for I used to see his
+shadow on the wall, goin' through the motions of filin', sawin', and
+hammerin', though I could never guess what he was workin' on. I have
+known him sometimes to be at this queer business till daylight. For
+three years the strange old gentleman never missed a night at his work.
+I fear you are not quite well, young lady. Take a glass of water."
+
+Pet sipped from the proffered glass, and declared that she was much
+better now,
+
+"One night, about two years ago, I took a look into this room with my
+spyglass. I generally didn't do it until three or four o'clock in the
+mornin', when all the other lights in the neighborhood was out. But, on
+that partickler night, about eleven o'clock, I happened to observe that
+one of the window curtains which covered the lower sash was left partly
+undrawn. This had never occurred before, and so I brought my glass to
+bear on the room at once. A tall gentleman, whose face I had often seen
+movin' in the room over the top o' the curtain, was just in the act of
+takin' his departure, which he did without shakin' hands. The old man
+then went to his place at the other window, and tackled to his work
+again. He had been at it about twenty minutes, when a bar, or rod, which
+stuck up above the curtain, and was somehow connected with his work,
+fell forward with a quick motion, as if it was jerked away. The old man
+stooped, picked it up, and fixed it in its place again. His face, as
+well as I could see through my glass in the night time, at that
+distance, showed a wonderful amount of surprise and astonishment--at the
+fall of this rod or bar, I s'pose. He then seemed to be filin' on
+somethin', and afterward stooped down, as if to put it into some part of
+the machine, or whatever it was. Jest at that minute the Post Office
+struck, and I put down my glass, and turned my head toward the sound, to
+catch the district. It struck seven. I jumped to the lever, and started
+the old bell for seven, too. As I was strikin' the first round, my eyes
+happened to rest on the strange window again. The old man was not
+standin' there. The bar, or rod, had fallen out of its place again, I
+s'posed, and I expected every minute to see the old man appear at the
+window, and fix it again. But he didn't show himself any more that
+night--and (which is the curious part of my story) I've never seen him
+since. Whether he dropped dead from heart disease, I can't guess; but
+certain I am that he is dead, for--"
+
+Poor Pet here exhibited such signs of faintness, that Bog, who had been
+leaning against the edge of the window, gazing at the well-known window
+with a strange fascination, sprang to her side, and instantly bathed her
+brow with water from Uncle Ith's old pitcher, near at hand. This
+restored her. "Be calm, dearest," said Bog.
+
+"What--what is the matter with the young lady?" asked Uncle Ith, in
+great trepidation. "Shall I run for a doctor?"
+
+"No, Uncle Ith; no doctor. But we won't talk any more about this strange
+room at present. It affects Miss Wilkeson's nerves."
+
+"The shock is past, dear Bog," said she, "and I can bear to hear
+everything."
+
+"But you must promise to control yoursell, darling," said Bog, tenderly.
+
+"One question, Uncle Ith," said he. "How long a time were your eyes off
+the room, after the first stroke for the Seventh District?"
+
+"Not more than three seconds."
+
+"And you are sure that there was nobody in the room?"
+
+"Certain; for I must have seen him enter, or go out."
+
+"Then, Uncle Ith, you have cleared up a great mystery."
+
+"What! What mystery?"
+
+"The death of Mr. Minford, the inventor, my old friend, and the
+protector and guardian of Miss Wilkeson. He lived in that very room! He
+was at work on a perpetual-motion machine! It was operated, somehow, by
+weights! It started suddenly, when you saw that rod, or lever, fall to
+the floor! Mr. Minford put the rod in its place, and made some little
+improvement in the works! The machine started again at a moment when
+your eyes were turned away! The rod fell with greater violence, struck
+the inventor on the head, and killed him! That is the whole story; and
+stupid we have all been not to have guessed it before."
+
+Nature furnished her own sweet relief to Pet's pent-up emotions. She
+burst into tears. "Thank Heaven," said she, "it is all plain now!"
+
+Pet had not whispered it to Mrs. Crull, or Bog, or her uncle, or to any
+other living soul, but the mystery of that awful night had hung over her
+young mind like a pall, which in vain she had tried to lift.
+
+"What a blockhead I am," cried Uncle Ith, "not to take the papers! If I
+had only taken the papers, now, I should ha' read all about that affair,
+and might ha' guessed that the man who was s'posed to be murdered was
+the man I had seen workin' in that room for three years. Then I should
+ha' offered myself as a witness, and might ha' thrown some light on the
+business. I'll 'scribe for a paper to-day, instead of trustin' to
+hearsay for the news."
+
+"And a very neglectful fellow was I," said Bog, "not to have called here
+and seen you, after that sad affair. But the truth was, that Pet went to
+live with her best of friends, Mrs. Crull, and I had no longer a desire
+to look at the room from your bell tower. In fact," Bog added, with a
+smile, "the tower has not been quite as interesting for two years past
+as it used to be. If I had come up here at any time since Mr. Minford's
+death, I should probably have told you of the supposed murder, and
+pointed out those windows to you. But--"
+
+"But you forgot all about your old uncle. Ha! I understand. Well, I
+forgive you, seein' what there was to 'sturb your recollections." Uncle
+Ith looked affectionately at Pet, who smiled and blushed through
+her tears.
+
+The old man continued: "I 'member once when we met in the street, about
+two years ago--"
+
+"I used to come around this way, you must know, Uncle Ith, in order to
+meet you, two or three times a week."
+
+"I give you credit for that, Bog. You never disowned your poor old
+uncle. But, as I was sayin', I 'member one time when we met, that you
+told me somethin' about the murder of somebody of your 'quaintance. But
+I didn't take no partickler interest in it, because I didn't know any of
+the parties concerned. And, of course, I didn't dream that poor Mr.
+Minford was the man I had seen workin' away there for three years. But
+the main fault is mine, because I don't take the papers. I see, now,
+that every man ought to take the papers--if only as a duty to his feller
+man." Uncle Ith coughed, as one who utters a maxim of great moral depth.
+
+It was then agreed, at Bog's suggestion, that Uncle Ith, accompanied by
+him, should call at Overtop's office, at early business hours (when
+Uncle Ith was off duty), next day, and consult upon the best course to
+be adopted to make his testimony public, and set the mystery of Mr.
+Minford's death forever at rest.
+
+This having been done, Bog and Pet withdrew, and had hardly reached the
+foot of the tower, when the musical thunder of the great bell announced
+the constantly reiterated story of a fire in the Seventh--that most
+combustible of all the city districts.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+LOVE CROWNED.
+
+Late on a fair afternoon of May, wedding guests began to assemble at old
+Van Quintem's house. The old gentleman had been out of society many
+years; and he improved this happy occasion to bring together his few
+surviving relatives, and friends of his former business days.
+
+Heavy antique carriages rolled up to the door, with retired merchants
+and their wives. The retired merchants were of a pattern not altogether
+extinct in New York, who, at the ages of sixty years and upward, had
+cleared their skirts of business, and settled down to a calm retrospect
+of the past, and serene anticipations of the future. They were
+evidently destined for a good old age, and had fat pocket books to help
+them through. The proper place to look for this class of retired
+merchants is on the tax books, and not in public assemblies, or among
+the Directing Boards of benevolent institutions. They are good,
+charitable souls; but, having got out of business, they desire to keep
+out of it literally, leaving to a younger generation the task of
+managing men and affairs.
+
+A more stylish vehicle deposited at the door a bachelor Bank President,
+who was not only the old personal friend of the host, but his trusted
+adviser in business affairs. The parlor of the ---- Bank was one of the
+few places that old Van Quintem still visited in the bustling haunts of
+the city; and to old Van Quintem's house the bachelor Bank President
+made monthly pilgrimages of friendship. He was a handsome man of fifty,
+with long white hair, which matched beautifully with his yet ruddy
+cheeks, and a figure portly and full of strength. Nobody but himself
+knew why so eligible a man remained a bachelor.
+
+In a humpbacked chaise drawn by an exemplary horse, there rode a fat and
+pleasant old gentleman, who was uncomfortably swathed about the neck
+with a white cravat. He crawled from his narrow coop with the nimbleness
+of one who is on professional business. He was followed by his wife, a
+little woman, who was the mother of ten children from two to twenty
+years of age--just two years apart, and all strongly resembling their
+father. This fat, pleasant old gentleman was the old-fashioned minister
+of the old-fashioned church to which Mr. Van Quintem had belonged for
+forty years. The little woman was his second wife; and there was a first
+crop of children, who had been safely launched on the world for many
+years, and were doing extremely well.
+
+The sole surviving relatives of old Van Quintem were three elderly
+ladies, who, by some contagious fatality, remained unmarried. After
+pining romantically over their doom for some time, they had settled down
+to the conviction that they were much happier single than wedded, and
+that they had escaped a great many dangers and disappointments--which
+was unquestionably true. It was really pleasant for them to reflect that
+the snug property which their father left them had not been squandered
+upon designing husbands, but had been kept, improved, and added to,
+until it was one of the prettiest estates on Staten Island. These ladies
+were first cousins of old Van Quintem, and had an odd habit of staying
+at home. They came to New York always on important business, which could
+not be transacted by any one else, four times a year; and, on those
+occasions, paid state visits to old Van Quintem, who reciprocated the
+civility by calling on them, in a ceremonial way, twice every summer.
+
+Uncle Ith came on foot; and wore his old blue coat with brass buttons,
+his flowered vest, and shining trousers so awkwardly, that people who
+did not know him stared at him as at a strange spectacle. People--and
+they were many--who did know him, stared at him with a still greater
+surprise, wondering what extraordinary event in his history was about to
+occur. Uncle Ith felt the additional embarrassment of fame, or
+notoriety; for an affidavit, prepared by Overtop, giving the full
+particulars of his observations from the bell tower, had been published
+in all the city papers that morning. Before noon, Uncle Ith had been
+waited on by six newspaper reporters, to whom he had furnished
+particulars of his early life; and had promised to sit for his
+photograph, for the use of an illustrated weekly, on the following day.
+For all these reasons, added to his natural modesty, he pulled the door
+bell with a feeling of profound regret, which was followed by a strange
+desire to run around the corner. Before this desire could have been
+gratified, the door was opened by a servant, and Uncle Ith was
+ushered in.
+
+The anticipated awkwardness of an introduction to old Van Quintem, was
+prevented by the approach of that gentleman before his name was
+announced.
+
+"Welcome! welcome!" said he, shaking him by the hand with Dutch fervor.
+"I know you from Bog's description, you see. Your statement in the
+morning papers has lifted a load from several hearts, I can tell you.
+Bog will be delighted to see you. He was beginning to be afraid you
+would not come. Hallo, Bog!" said, the good old gentleman, shouting up
+the stairs; "here is Uncle Ith."
+
+The bridegroom bounded down the stairs with boyish impetuosity, looking
+so fine that Uncle Ith hardly knew him. It was difficult to realize that
+the ungainly, ignorant boy of a few years back, had become this
+nice-looking, graceful young gentleman. Thus readily does the rough
+diamond of a good heart and brain, under the guiding hands of Ambition
+and Love, take its polish from contact with the world and with society!
+
+"Dear Uncle Ith!" said the bridegroom.
+
+"Happy to see you, Uncle Ith!" exclaimed Fayette Overtop, who, with
+Marcus Wilkeson and Matthew Maltboy, had been drawn from the second
+floor at the mention of his name.
+
+Marcus had not before seen Uncle Ith, though he had been thinking of him
+all day. The publication of the old man's affidavit was an entire
+surprise to Marcus--Overtop and Maltboy having said nothing to him about
+it. Other people read the document with interest, because it solved a
+mystery. But to Marcus it wore the profounder, vastly greater importance
+of clearing the last shadow of foul suspicion from his name. It may be
+unnecessary to say, that it also gave rise to learned and interesting,
+but profitless discussions, in several of the papers, upon the
+possibilities of perpetual motion--which lasted until the explosion of a
+steam boiler under the pavement turned every editor to the consideration
+of steam boilers, their nature and habits, the rights of owners and of
+the public, and the necessity of stringent legislation for the better
+management of those subterranean powers of good and evil.
+
+Upon being introduced to Uncle Ith, Marcus gave the old man's hand a
+warm pressure, but said nothing. But Uncle Ith saw in his eyes an
+expression of the deepest gratitude, and he knew what it meant; for he
+had read the report of the inquest at Overtop's office, and there
+learned, for the first time, the unhappy connection of Marcus Wilkeson
+with the Minford affair.
+
+Maltboy, who, being one of the appointed groomsmen of the day, was in
+extraordinary spirits, was profuse in his congratulations to Uncle Ith,
+and insisted, rather unnecessarily, upon introducing him to the retired
+merchants and the bachelor Bank President. They had all read his
+affidavit, and regarded him with undisguised interest.
+
+For a man who has always been a lamb in his shyness and
+self-depreciation, to find himself suddenly transformed into a lion, is
+a cause of no little embarrassment. Uncle Ith was so much flustered by
+all these tokens of popularity, that he could not utter an articulate
+word, but only mumble, and wipe his heated brow. He wished that the
+usages of society would permit him to take off his coat, as he did in
+the bell tower, and be comfortable.
+
+A few more guests arrived, mostly of the ancient order, and a little too
+much of one sort to please a lover of variety. The advent of Mr. Frump,
+with all his impulsive occidental peculiarities of character fresh upon
+him, was a decided relief to the decorous company already assembled in
+the parlors. In less than ten minutes, he was on terms of off-hand
+friendship with everybody, and was telling strange stories of Western
+adventure to a group of eager listeners.
+
+Old Van Quintem received all his guests with that simple cordiality
+which leaves no doubt of a sincere welcome. The common remark was, "How
+well you are looking, Mr. Van Quintem!" And it was very true. Few men at
+seventy could show a figure so straight, cheeks so smooth, and an eye so
+bright. The unavailing sorrow which tenanted his heart two years before,
+had gradually disappeared. From the hour that his son fled abashed from
+his presence, he had not seen or heard of him, and had at last come to
+regard him as dead--though the old gentleman could not have given a good
+reason for that singular belief, except that his son had been a
+constant cause of sorrow and trouble to him when alive. He preferred to
+think of the lost son not as the ripened villain, but as the innocent
+child prattling upon its mother's knee. This mental picture filled a
+select chamber of the old man's memory. But the affection and
+reverential duty of a son had been supplied by the boy Bog; and, in the
+virtuous character and filial love of that young man, he saw what the
+innocent child might have grown to, had all his prayers and tears
+been answered.
+
+When old Van Quintem's wishes were consulted with regard to the wedding,
+he had but one favor to ask; and that was, that the ceremony might take
+place at his house. It was a whimsical idea, he said, but he would like
+to see his old home gay once more, as it used to be years ago.
+"Besides," said he, "I am rheumatic, and might not be able to attend the
+wedding, if held elsewhere."
+
+Mrs. Crull, when she first heard, from the lips of the blushing Pet,
+that Bog had proposed and been accepted, immediately outlined the plan
+of a wedding at her house, which should be something unprecedented in
+point of magnificence. The plan took shape as she thought of it, and she
+had already settled upon the number of invitations, and the other
+principal arrangements, when old Van Quintem's wish was mentioned to
+her. The sacrifice was a great one; and Mrs. Crull would make it only on
+condition that she should superintend the preparations with the same
+freedom as at her own house. Old Van Quintem consented to this, only
+stipulating that he should pay all the bills; and, for over a week
+before the wedding, Mrs. Crull, assisted by that most buxom and busy of
+women, Mrs. Frump, had taken tyrannical possession of the dwelling, and
+made such extraordinary transpositions of the carpets and pictures, and
+other movable property, that old Van Quintem, on surveying the work of
+renovation, hardly recognized the house as his own. The only apartment
+that was not inwardly transformed by these female magicians was the
+library. To that he clung, conscious that both his services and his
+advice were of no value.
+
+The house was soon filled with guests--or rather appeared to be filled,
+for the whole number invited and present was only forty. But forty
+people, moving about uneasily, and expecting something, look like a
+hundred or more. Among them were many whose only claim to an invitation
+was their friendship for the host, or Mrs. Crull, or the bride, and not
+any mental, moral, or physical excellence which entitles them to mention
+in this history.
+
+There were two rooms on the second floor, upon which the interest of
+loungers, male and female, was concentrated.
+
+In one waited the bridegroom, his groomsmen Overtop and Maltboy, Marcus
+Wilkeson and Wesley Tiffles. They were a happy party, and not at all
+frightened at the approaching nuptials. Bog--for such his friends always
+did, should, and will call him--could not have been happier--far from
+it!--if he had held a sceptre in each hand. Overtop was happy in the
+contemplation of his marriage with that most sensible of girls, Miss
+Pillbody, which was set down for the week following. The affair would
+have come off six months before, but for Miss Pillbody's illness,
+happening soon after her mother's death. In consequence of this illness,
+her select school had been given up--never to be revived. Poor Overtop
+did not know how much he loved her, until he saw how near he came to
+losing her. She had completely recovered, was ruddy and pretty with new
+health, and was Pet's first bridesmaid. Overtop thought pleasantly of
+her, and combed back his intractable cowlick. Matthew Maltboy was happy
+because he had taken a serious fancy to Miss Trapper, the second
+bridesmaid, a charming but peculiar girl, and the particular juvenile
+friend of Mrs. Frump. Matthew had met this young lady two or three
+times, and had suffered sweetly from her black eyes. Marcus Wilkeson was
+happy in his contented bachelorhood, in the happiness of his niece and
+of all around him, and in the clearing up of the "Minford enigma."
+Wesley Tiffles was happy because happiness was his constitutional
+disposition, under all circumstances and in all weathers. The arrival of
+Uncle Ith was the only event that had drawn this good-natured party from
+their retreat; and those who watched for their reappearance were
+disappointed.
+
+In the other room, the bride had been dressing for several hours, and
+was still hard at it, under the immediate supervision of the
+indefatigable Mrs. Crull, Mrs. Frump, and the two bridesmaids. Only the
+favored few were admitted to this retreat of mysteries. But they were
+kindly communicative. They brought back minute reports of the appearance
+and condition of the bride elect, in the various stages of her
+enrobement and ornamentation; and there was not a woman in the house who
+did not, every ten minutes, have the image of Helen Wilkeson stamped on
+her mind as accurately as the changeful phases of an eclipse on the
+photographer's plate.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+At the soft, calm, mystic, love-making, marrying twilight hour, the
+bridal party took their stand near the southern end of the great double
+parlor. The forty guests were grouped before them, an audience
+without seats.
+
+Pet was pale, and leaned for support on Bog's arm. He stood firm, erect,
+unblenching, with that instinct of physical strength which one feels
+when the woman that he loves hangs confidingly on his arm. Fayette
+Overtop, with his well-known dislike for conventionalism, was thinking
+how tedious all that formality was, and how much more sensible to be
+married by an alderman or justice of the peace, privately, in two
+minutes. Miss Pillbody did not agree with her future husband on this
+point, and was thinking, at that very moment, what a solemn thing
+marriage was, and with what ceremonious deliberation it ought to be
+entered upon. Matthew Maltboy had had great experience as a groomsman,
+and he speculated with perfect composure on this important question:
+Whether the gentle tremor of Miss Trapper's hand was caused altogether
+by the fluttering novelty of her situation, or partly by the
+love-enkindling contact of their interlocked elbows?
+
+As the six took their chosen positions, and gazed at a particular
+pattern in the carpet, selected by them at a private rehearsal in the
+morning, they were the subject of mental comment by the forty guests.
+The women, looking at the costly dress of the bride, pronounced her
+beautiful. The men, never noticing her dress, but observing her pale
+face and heavy eyes, were not vividly impressed with her loveliness. Bog
+was admired by all, and envied by none to whom his history was known.
+The old ladies took a mild maternal interest in him, because he was an
+orphan; and the young ladies thought extremely well of him, because he
+was a strong, gallant, handsome fellow. Overtop was regarded with
+curiosity, as the reputed hero of the Slapman scandal. Matthew Maltboy
+was universally condemned as too fat, and, with that brief criticism,
+was dismissed. Miss Pillbody was pronounced "a little proud," because
+she stood straight, with shoulders thrown back, which was her usual
+attitude. Miss Trapper was admitted to be a very modest and diffident
+creature, because she had a slight stoop in the back, which was chronic.
+
+Old Van Quintem stood near the wedding party, and recalled, with fond
+minuteness, the hour when one, about the same age as Pet, and resembling
+her in the freshness of her youthful beauty, had crowned him with
+happiness. Mrs. Crull was close by, and looked at the bride, whom she
+had dressed, with the pride of an artist. Mrs. Frump stood next to her,
+and shared in the same sentiments. Marcus Wilkeson's appointed place was
+somewhere in the neighborhood of the bride; but he shrank away to the
+side of Uncle Ith, who also obstinately clung to the other end of
+the room.
+
+The venerable clergyman stepped into the centre of the small open space
+which had been left in front of the bridal party, and uttered a cough,
+at which signal the buzz of conversation ceased.
+
+The ceremony was very brief and simple--according to the ritual of the
+Dutch Church--and people were married by it before they knew it. The
+minister had received, in advance, a fee of unprecedented size, which
+was, at that moment, lying at the bottom of his wife's pocket, and which
+that good woman had already spent, in imagination, on a new bonnet for
+herself, a new hat for the minister, dresses for the girls, books for
+the boys, and playthings for the baby. If the dimensions of the fee had
+any effect whatever on the mind of the excellent minister, that effect
+was to hurry up the ceremony, and make the two one with the least
+possible delay.
+
+At last the magical, binding words were spoken; and the husband,
+stooping proudly to the not-averted face of his blushing wife, gave her
+the first kiss. And at the same instant a little band of musicians, with
+chosen instruments, secretly stationed in the library, of which the door
+was now thrown open, struck up Mendelssohn's divine Wedding March. As
+its jubilant notes floated through the house, the round of
+congratulations commenced.
+
+Blest Pet! What had she ever done--she thought, so far as giddy
+happiness would allow her to think--to merit all these kisses (of which
+her two shy uncles bestowed two), these benedictions, these tears, and,
+above all, the possession of this noble heart by her side, henceforth to
+be all her own? The exultant peals of the Wedding March--that highest
+expression of triumphal love--but faintly interpreted her joy.
+
+The bridegroom received his full share of the universal good wishes.
+Everybody was pleased with his behavior; and the bachelor Bank
+President, and other members of the old school of gentlemen, pronounced
+him a glorious young fellow, a refreshing contrast to the puny,
+cadaverous youth of the day, and altogether worthy to have flourished
+thirty years ago. The bridesmaids and groomsmen were not neglected
+either; and both Miss Pillbody and Miss Trapper thought that the next
+best thing to getting married, was to assist others in the operation.
+
+As for old Van Quintem, after kissing the bride, and calling Bog his
+son, and giving both of them his blessing, he had retired from the room
+to hide the tears of happiness which not even seventy years of this
+hardening world could keep from his eyes.
+
+For the second time in five minutes, Amos Frump approached Matthew
+Maltboy, and shook hands with him. "Fat and jolly as ever," said he.
+
+From the first adjective Matthew recoiled; though he tried to justify
+the propriety of the second by a laugh.
+
+"And I like you--hang me if I don't!" said Mr. Frump, with California
+bluntness, "_because_ you're fat and jolly. But here's wifey, and I know
+she wants to say somethin' to you."
+
+"So I do," said Mrs. Frump. "My head was so full of business to-day,
+that I had quite forgotten it. But you must step aside with me," she
+added, looking significantly at Miss Trapper.
+
+Matthew stepped aside; and she placed her lips to his ear, and
+whispered, "What do you think of Miss Trapper?"
+
+"A very pretty girl," said Matthew.
+
+"So she is; and one of the best-hearted creatures that ever lived. A
+little singular in one respect, perhaps."
+
+"What is that?"
+
+"Oh! she speaks out her mind--that's all. But then you always know where
+to find her."
+
+"She has not spoken any of it to me, at all events," said Matthew. "I
+can't get her to talk."
+
+"That's because she's modest. Cultivate her, and you'll find her a
+splendid girl. Between you and me, I have recommended you to her, and,
+depend upon it, she will meet you halfway."
+
+"All right," whispered Matthew, gratefully.
+
+Here the full voice of old Van Quintem announced dinner, for which the
+elderly ladies had been demurely waiting for some time. Two by two the
+bridal party and the guests marched to the banquet, spread in the long,
+broad dining room, which was one of the best features of this sturdy,
+old-fashioned house.
+
+What the bill of fare was; what tunes the band played in the library;
+what kind things were said to the bride and bridegroom; what compliments
+were breathed into young female ears, and not rebuked; what vows of love
+were exchanged; what courteous remarks of the old school were made by
+the bachelor Bank President; what ancient jokes were passed off by the
+wits of the party as new; what abominable conundrums were then and there
+honestly invented; what overwhelming confusion Uncle Ith experienced,
+when he found himself seated next to a lady who talked loud at him, and
+how he wished himself at home, one hundred feet from the ground; what
+complete happiness was felt and expressed by everybody, but especially
+by old Van Quintem and Marcus Wilkeson; what improbable stories were
+told by Mr. Frump; what philosophical sayings uttered on the spur of the
+moment by Fayette Overtop; what slightly impertinent but always amiable
+remarks advanced by Wesley Tiffles;--all this might be imagined, with a
+slight mental effort; but not so Matthew Maltboy's new misfortune.
+
+Profiting by Mrs. Frump's friendly suggestion, Matthew had exhausted all
+his resources of conversation in an effort to interest Miss Trapper. She
+had listened, and had returned faultlessly proper replies, and had
+conducted herself so much like all the other young women that Matthew
+had ever met, that he was puzzled to guess in what respect her
+singularity consisted. He longed to see a piece of that mind, which,
+according to Mrs. Frump, she was in the habit of exhibiting to people.
+He was soon gratified.
+
+Miss Trapper had remarked, that, in a few days, she was going to visit
+her friends in Chemung County, and would probably remain there three
+months. It struck Matthew as the right time to make a point.
+
+"Then I shall not see you, Miss Trapper, during all that time!" he said,
+with a sigh.
+
+Miss Trapper levelled a sharp glance at him, and said, "I suppose not."
+
+The remark was tartly made; but Matthew had noticed that she habitually
+spoke quick and short.
+
+"Our acquaintance has thus far been very pleasant, Miss Trapper; at
+least on my side," whispered Matthew. "Must it stop here?"
+
+To which Miss Trapper replied, "I don't know."
+
+Though the observation was not encouraging, it was, on the other hand,
+not entirely forbidding.
+
+"Since we are to be separated for three months, Miss Trapper, might I
+solicit the great privilege of corresponding with you occasionally?"
+
+Miss Trapper's thin lips expelled two words, like shot out of a gun:
+"What for?"
+
+"What for?" echoed the amazed Matthew. "Why--for the pleasure of
+exchanging our ideas, you know."
+
+"That would be a bore," said Miss Trapper.
+
+"I didn't understand you," said Matthew, distrusting his ears.
+
+"I said it would be a bore--a bore!" returned Miss Trapper, with painful
+distinctness. "I hate letter writing."
+
+"Oh! ah! Do you?" said Matthew, feebly. "Perhaps you would like some
+pickled cauliflower, Miss Trapper?"
+
+"Thank you."
+
+Matthew handed the pickled cauliflower to her, and held his tongue,
+satisfied with what he had seen of Miss Trapper's singularity, and not
+at all anxious to receive a larger piece of her mind.
+
+"I am doomed to be a bachelor," thought Matthew, with a suppressed
+groan. But Hope, which attends upon fat and lean men alike, whispered in
+his mind's ear, "Why not marry a woman as fat as yourself?"
+
+"A capital idea!" thought Matthew "and if there's no other way to find
+one, I'll advertise for her."
+
+Dinner was protracted to a length that seemed tedious to all but the
+representatives of the old school. When it did come to an end, the party
+adjourned to the parlors, where a reasonable time was devoted to
+conversation and flirtation. At length the musicians, having taken their
+wedding dinner in their apartment, and drank full bumpers (which,
+somehow, never interfere with the accuracy of musical performances) to
+the health of the happy pair, struck up a quadrille, which was at once
+interpreted by the younger people as a signal for dancing. Two sets were
+instantly formed, and rattled through with. The Lancers followed, and
+was liked so much that the musicians were called upon to repeat it three
+times. The sets had now increased to four, filling the two parlors, and
+crowding the elderly people to the wall or the hallway. Then, luckily,
+old Van Quintem bethought himself of the old-fashioned contra-dance, as
+a contrivance for bringing his contemporaries on their legs. By an
+extraordinary piece of good fortune, the musicians had learned it, and
+played it at a silver wedding the week previous.
+
+As the familiar notes, not heard for years, saluted the ears of the
+bachelor Bank President, he showed the animation of an old war-horse at
+the sound of the trumpet. "Now is our time," said he.
+
+Moved by common impulse, the members of a past generation rose, and took
+their places. Old Van Quintem, temporarily forgetting his rheumatism,
+led off, escorting Mrs. Crull. The bachelor Bank President took charge
+of a widow, in whose breast he had revived feelings that flourished
+twenty years before. The retired merchants brought each other's wives
+upon the floor. Even Uncle Ith came out from his seclusion in a corner,
+where he had been listening to the sound of his own fire bell, rung by
+other hands that night, and felt that here, at least, he should make no
+blunders. The tall, talkative lady, from whom there seemed to be no
+escape, had fastened on him as a partner. The good clergyman was the
+only old or middle-aged gentleman who did not take his place in the set,
+and he looked on and laughed.
+
+The dance commenced, slow at first, then gradually faster. The younger
+people, when they came to understand the simple movement, fell into the
+chain couple after couple, until it extended into the hallway, and
+through it into the parlors again. Everybody was drawn in now, old and
+young, married and unmarried, the minister and his wife only excepted,
+and they marked the measure with their heels. Round and round, and
+faster and faster, went the chain, with its constantly changing links.
+The musicians, playing the same strains over and over again, became
+frenzied by the repetition, and doubled the time without knowing it.
+Legs that had entered slow and stately upon the interminable maze,
+became, without the knowledge or consent of their owners, nimble and
+gymnastics.
+
+It was a delightful peculiarity of this wonderful dance, that couples
+could withdraw without breaking up the figure. The bride and groom,
+acting upon this privilege, slipped out of the flying circle, and
+sought, unaccompanied, the solitude of the vine-covered piazza behind
+the house, there to commune for a moment upon their new-found happiness.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The night was calm. A faint breeze from the south stirred up secret
+odors in the hearts of dew-covered flowers, and musically sighed through
+the leaves and vines. The heavens were dark, but unclouded; and, as the
+lips of the lovers met in one clinging kiss, the host of stars beamed
+down upon them, and proclaimed an ETERNITY OF LOVE.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+FIVE YEARS.
+
+Five years are an eventful space in the history of blocks, as of men.
+Within that period, they may be burnt down, blown down, or torn down to
+make room for grander blocks. In quick-growing American cities, the
+average life of blocks is less than that of the human generation that
+tenants them. First wood, then brick, then brownstone or marble--these
+are the successive forms of block life, before anything like stability
+is reached. Marble is the only real type of the permanent in American
+architecture. Nobody pulls down marble.
+
+But five years had made little change in the exterior of our block. It
+was situated at a point in the city from which the ebb tide of Fashion
+was slowly receding, and which the flood tide of Trade had not yet
+touched. There was not a new house on the block, or an old one
+materially altered. A little paint, and a diligent application of broom
+and Croton water, had kept the block quite fresh and jaunty. On the
+south side there were some slight external modifications, in the shape
+of oblong black signs, fastened near basement doors, and bearing names
+of doctors. Ten of these signs had been added to the south side within
+five years. There were only two houses upon that side, now, to which you
+could come amiss in pursuit of medical advice.
+
+One of these was old Van Quintem's. Five years had passed over the old
+house and the old man lightly (both had been made to last, and were well
+taken care of), and gave to them only a mellower and riper look. The old
+man's long white hair had not commenced falling out; and his cheeks
+still bloomed with a ruddiness that does not belong to second childhood.
+He could still read his dear old books--and carefully chosen new
+ones--without spectacles; though he often preferred to hear them read in
+a soft, sweet tone, by a dear girl whom he always called Pet, and who
+would sit for hours at the old man's feet, giving to the noble thoughts
+of poet, novelist, or philosopher, the added charm of a sympathetic
+voice. At such times, a fine fellow, who was still known as Bog, would
+look on and listen, with rapt attention, and the happiest smile on his
+face. Sometimes these tranquil scenes would be pleasantly broken in
+upon, and the meaning of the author profitably obscured, by the entrance
+of a certain little Helen, whom the old man would kiss, and call
+"Grandpop's sugarp'um," and "Sweety peety." Bog would then catch it up,
+and toss it aloft, all whirling with curls, laces, and blue ribbons, and
+would say, "Cud-je-wod-je now, cud-je-wod-je now, cud-je-wod-je now," at
+each tossing; and the child, with the marvellous instinct of eighteen
+months, would understand this mysterious dialect, and then would smile
+through large blue eyes that looked like its mother's.
+
+To this house, Myndert Van Quintem, jr., had never returned; and no
+authentic intelligence of him had ever come. Fayette Overtop, Esq.,
+while on a professional visit to St. Paul, Minnesota, to settle a large
+land claim, had heard of a notorious Van Benton, who had kept a gambling
+house there several years, and was finally killed by a spendthrift whom
+he had cleaned out of his last cent one night. The best description
+which he could get of this man, tallied precisely with that of Myndert
+Van Quintem, jr. But Overtop, with that discretion which was continually
+enlarging his circle of paying practice, said nothing of this to the old
+gentleman. Among the reports that Overtop had heard of this Van Benton,
+was one, that he had forged his father's signature to large amounts in
+New York city, and had fled to the West, and there changed his name to
+avoid the arrest and punishment which his father had promised him. Had
+the old gentleman been informed of this circumstance, he would at once
+have identified Van Benton as his son; for it was known to him alone,
+that young Myndert had repeatedly forged his name (evidences of which
+had been found in the desk where Marcus Wilkeson had often seen the
+young man busily writing--evidences which the forger had accidentally
+omitted to burn), and that he had been induced to leave the city through
+fear that his father would give him up to justice at last. On the
+memorable night in the milliner's shop in Greenpoint, the young
+profligate had seen that his father was terribly in earnest, and had
+quailed in the presence of that outraged and indignant soul.
+
+The second house not ornamented by a doctor's sign, on the south side of
+the block, was the old tenement building of which Mr. Minford had
+occupied the upper story, five years before. The tenants had all been
+changed two or three times; but the "Minford tragedy" was still a
+current legend among them. Murders, or strange homicides, are fixtures
+of houses where they occur. Nothing obliterates their memory but tearing
+down the houses, and building anew--which is the course of treatment
+that the proprietor was proposing to himself, in consequence of the
+steady depreciation of rents. Pet never passed that house, or dared to
+look at it even from a distance.
+
+Bachelors' Hall, on the north side of the block, was still occupied by
+the three original tenants; and they liked it so well, that they had
+bought it, and owned it on the Tontine plan--viz., that, upon the death
+of one of the owners, his share shall go to the survivors.
+
+Five years had improved Marcus Wilkeson's relish for a good book, an
+after-dinner pipe, and a chat with a friend. It was plain to all his
+friends--even to those who were happiest in their wedded lives--that
+Marcus was a great deal better off single than married. His was the
+genial monkish nature, which thrives best in celibacy.
+
+Every afternoon Marcus visited his white-haired neighbor opposite, and
+never forgot to take along a toy, or some candy, for his grandniece
+Helen. He brought these offerings in lieu of baby talk, which he could
+never master. This fact pointed him out, beyond all question, as a
+predestined old bachelor.
+
+The general supervision of the house was intrusted to Mrs. Overtop; and
+most sensibly did she manage it. Knowing that a bar of cast iron is more
+easily bent than the set habits of men of twenty-five and upward, she
+attempted no changes in the domestic regulations of the establishment.
+The three friends found that they had not only all of their old freedom,
+but a charming female voice to accompany them in their songs, and on the
+piano or guitar, and a capital fourth hand at whist, and a beautiful
+reader, and an ever-cheerful companion. "If I could find such a wife,
+now!" Marcus and Maltboy would say. "But you can't," Overtop would
+answer. "There's not another like her in this world." There was a
+little Fayette Overtop, jr., two years old, a great pet of the
+bachelors, and the far-off husband of little Helen, on the other side of
+the block.
+
+Matthew Maltboy weighed two hundred and twenty pounds. As associate
+counsel of Overtop, he made an imposing show in court, which was not
+fully borne out by his legal attainments. He was always talking of
+matrimonial intentions--a sure sign that a man never will be married.
+His last rebuff from Miss Trapper (now the wife of a wealthy tanner and
+currier) had taught him to keep his flirtations within narrower limits;
+but he openly professed, and probably believed, that, when he really
+wanted to marry--without joking, you know--he could take his pick from
+the wide and varied ranges of female society. He smoked incessantly like
+a martyr, to reduce his flesh, but no adipose matter ever vanished in
+that cloud of sacrifice!
+
+Mash, the cook, bestowed her honest hand and maiden heart upon Patching,
+the artist, who had first seen her at the station house, and there
+contracted an artistic admiration of her face and figure. She would have
+preferred a pirate; but Patching's enormous hat gave him a freebooterish
+appearance, which went far to reconcile her to him. She was really a
+pretty woman--much handsomer than some of the shadowy beauties Patching
+was wont to put on canvas--and she made him a good and faithful
+wife--and cooked better dinners for him, at a small expense, than he had
+ever eaten before--and sent him out into the world clean and tidy every
+morning. Patching affected to be ashamed of his wife, and snubbed her
+sometimes in the presence of other people. But everybody who knew the
+couple, saw that he had the best of the bargain. Mrs. Patching still
+took her favorite weekly, and cried over the stories as copiously
+as ever.
+
+Mrs. Crull continued to be the dearest and best friend of Pet and Mrs.
+Overtop; and little Helen and little Fayette would never know the great
+debt of gratitude that they owed to that excellent lady. Whenever she
+called on Mrs. Overtop, she always began to be extremely circumspect in
+her pronunciation and grammar, from force of habit; but soon relapsed
+into those old errors which, happily, were of the head, and not of the
+heart. Mrs. Crull made no mistakes in her affections. She was in
+mourning for Mr. Crull, and truly vowed that she would never
+marry again.
+
+Mrs. Slapman had ceased to live on the block. Mr. Slapman had basely
+defeated the beneficent decree of the law, by turning his property into
+ready cash, and sailing for Europe. This deprived Mrs. S. of her alimony
+the second year after their separation, and compelled her to give up
+housekeeping, and the pursuit of TRUTH, in New York. She is now living
+among a small colony of Jigbees, in an obscure village of Connecticut,
+the pride of her family, the envy of the neighbors, and the idol of two
+local poets and of the professor of a High School in an adjoining town,
+who has learned her history, and is now patiently waiting for Slapman to
+die before offering her his hand in marriage.
+
+Uncle Ith rang the great bell in the high tower for a number of years,
+with perfect satisfaction to himself and to the firemen. He took a
+paper, and he read it, and he found its political arguments so powerful,
+and so interesting, that he adopted them as his own--as many another man
+of greater pretensions has done--and he got into the bad habit of
+talking politics in a small way. It happened, not long after, that there
+was an election for mayor; and a mayor was chosen who held to a variety
+of politics quite the opposite of that which was so ably inculcated in
+Uncle Ith's favorite journal. About a month later, Uncle Ith turned to
+the political column of his paper, and there read that he had been
+turned out of office, and that one Schimmerfliming--a German politician
+of the ----th Ward, who had been of great service in compassing the
+election of the new mayor--had been appointed in his place. The fact
+was, that Uncle Ith was highly acceptable to all parties as a no-party
+man. But, when he turned politician, he made himself amenable to the
+harsh laws of political warfare, and became (as his paper phrased it)
+"the hoary-headed victim of the unprincipled tyrant who, with the
+cunning of the serpent and the vindictive ferocity of the hyena, weaves
+his spider's web of mischief in his dark corner of the City Hall." Uncle
+Ith retired to private life with a snug property, patiently saved up and
+thoughtfully invested. But, as Adam went on eating apples,
+notwithstanding the disaster which had come to him from that species of
+fruit, so Uncle Ith took his newspaper, and paid for it punctually, and
+devoured it daily to the last.
+
+While Uncle Ith fell by politics, Coroner Bullfast rose by it. A
+judicious distribution of money and liquors, a notoriety for street
+fights, a singular talent for profanity, and an unstinted adulation of
+the basest classes of the community, won for him, in succession, some of
+the best prizes of the Municipal lottery. He has his small, sunken eyes
+now fixed on one of the highest offices of the State; and it will take a
+strong combination to defeat a candidate backed by such powerful
+agencies and interests.
+
+Mr. and Mrs. Frump lived happily on their country property. Mr. Frump
+tried experiments in blackberry raising, which proved a success, and
+was, at last accounts, concentrating his talents on the development of a
+new strawberry seedling. Whenever he went to town, he made a point of
+carrying back Matthew Maltboy, for whom his regard was inexplicably
+strong; and nothing gave him greater pleasure than to see his wife,
+gracefully mounted on the spirited filly, and Matthew, heavily astride
+of the sober gray, starting off for a morning's ride, while he stayed at
+home to push on the seedling.
+
+When Wesley Tiffles had spent ten thousand dollars in elegant leisure,
+he arrived at the noble determination to "salt down," as he called it,
+the remaining ten thousand dollars, in ten different savings banks. He
+distributed it thus, in order that the failure of one of the banks might
+not ruin him. The interest of this money, drawn half-yearly, furnished
+him with a basis for operations of a character requiring genius, pens,
+ink, and paper, rather than ready cash. Whenever Tiffles's resources ran
+short, as they did occasionally, he always borrowed, and paid on the
+next interest day. In this policy he was inflexible; and he flattered
+himself on the sternness of his self-denial.
+
+Among the schemes which failed to receive the cordial approbation of
+capitalists, were the following: "A process for extracting green paint
+from green leaves;" ditto for "making nutritious food from the direct
+combination of earth, air, and water;" a plan (submitted to the
+unappreciating Government of Naples) to "extinguish the volcano of
+Vesuvius, by pumping water from the Bay into the crater, in
+consideration of the sum of one million florins, and a monopoly of
+working the extinct volcano for lava."
+
+Wesley Tiffles, profiting, at a late day, by the lesson of the
+"Cosmopolitan Window Fastener," finally invented and patented a striking
+improvement in an apple-paring machine, and, at last accounts, was
+clenching a good bargain for the sale of his invention.
+
+
+
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