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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Barks and Purrs
+by Colette Willy, aka Colette
+Translated by Maire Kelly
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Barks and Purrs
+
+Author: Colette Willy, aka Colette
+Translated by Maire Kelly
+
+Release Date: March 28, 2004 [EBook #11737]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK BARKS AND PURRS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Hilary Caws-Elwitt and PG Distributed Proofreaders
+
+
+
+
+
+
+BARKS AND PURRS
+
+BY
+
+COLETTE WILLY
+
+
+
+
+TRANSLATED BY
+
+MAIRE KELLY
+
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+PREFACE
+SENTIMENTALITIES
+ON THE TRAIN
+DINNER IS LATE
+SHE IS ILL
+THE FIRST FIRE
+THE STORM
+A CALLER
+
+
+
+
+PREFACE
+
+_Madame_:
+
+_There are moments when one seems to come to life. One looks about and
+distinguishes a creature whose foot-print closely resembles the ace of
+spades. The thing says: bow-wow. It is a dog. One looks again. The ace
+of spades is now an ace of clubs. The thing says: pffffffff--and it is a
+cat._
+
+_This is the history of the visible world and in particular, that of my
+god-children, Toby-Dog and Kiki-the-Demure. They are so natural--I use
+the word in the sense in which it is applicable to the savages of
+Oceania--that all their acts conspire to make of life, a very simple
+proposition. These are animals in the fullest sense of the
+word--animos--if I may employ the original orthography, capable of
+exclaiming with those of Faust_:  "The fool knows it not! He knows not
+the pot, He knows not the kettle."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_And as such, Madame, you have placed them exactly where they should be:
+their earthly Paradise is the apartment of Monsieur Willy. In your
+salon, the probable palm and rubber-plant give the impression of
+luxuriant Edenic flora, relatively speaking, and illustrate the
+transmogrification which is to allow M. Gaston Deschamps--critic of a_
+"Temps" _plus-que-passé--to announce to the wilderness (where he speaks
+familiarly of Chateaubriand), and to the Collège de France, how well he
+can admire and understand a true poet_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_For you are a true poet and I will declare it freely, not concerning
+myself more with the legends Parisians have the habit of weaving about
+every celebrity. They admire Gauguin and Verlaine, not so much for their
+originality, as for their eccentricities. And so it happens that certain
+persons, unacquainted with the nameless sentiment, the order and purity,
+the thousand interior virtues which guide you, persist in saying that
+you wear your hair short and that Willy is bald._
+
+_Must I then--living at Orthez--tell_ Tout-Paris _who you are, present
+you to all who know you--I who have never seen you_?
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_I will say then, that Madame Colette Willy never had short hair, that
+she does not wear masculine attire; that her cat does not accompany her
+when she goes to a concert, that her friend's dog does not drink from a
+tumbler. It is inexact to say that Mme. Colette Willy works in a
+squirrel's cage, or performs upon trapeze and flying rings, and can
+reach with her toe the nape of her neck. Madame Colette Willy has never
+ceased to be the_ plain woman _par excellence, who rises at dawn to give
+oats to the horse, maize to the chickens, cabbage to the rabbits,
+groundsel to the canaries, snails to the ducks and bran-water to the
+pigs. At eight o'clock, summer and winter, she prepares the café au lait
+for her maid--and herself. Scarcely a day passes that she does not
+meditate upon this admirable book_:
+
+A LADY'S COUNTRY-HOUSE
+
+BY
+
+MME. MILLET ROBINET.
+
+_Orchard, kitchen-garden, stable, poultry-yard, bee-hive and hot-house,
+have no further mysteries for Madame Colette Willy. They say, she
+refused to divulge her secret for the destruction of mole-crickets to "a
+great statesman, who prayed her on his knees."_
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_Madame Colette Willy is in no way different from the description I have
+just given of her. I am aware that certain folk, having met her in
+society, insist upon making her very complex. A little more, and they
+would have ascribed to her the tastes of the mustiest symbolists--and
+one knows how far from pleasing are those Muses' robes, how odious the
+yellow bandeaux above faces expressionless as eggs. Robes and bandeaux
+are to-day relegated to drawers in the Capitol at Toulouse, from which
+they will never be taken more, except when occasion calls for the
+howling of official alexandrines in honor of M. Gaston Deschamps,
+Jaurès, or Vercingétorix._
+
+_Madame Colette Willy rises to-day on the world of Letters as the
+poetess--at last!--who, with the tip of her slipper sends all the
+painted, laureled, cothurnèd, lyre-carrying Muses--that, from Monselet
+to Renan, have roused the aspirations of classes in Rhetoric--rolling,
+from the top to the bottom of Parnassus._
+
+_How charming she is thus--presenting her bull-dog and her cat with as
+much assurance as Diana would her hound, or a Bacchante her tiger._
+
+_See her apple-cheeks, her eyes like blue myosotis, her
+lips--poppy-petals, and her ivy-like grace! Tell me if this way of
+leaning against the green barrier of her garden-close, or of lying under
+the murmurous arbor of mid-Summer, is not worth the starched manner,
+that old magistrate de Vigny--with his neckcloth wound three times
+around, and rigid in his trousers' straps--imposed upon his goddesses?
+Madame Colette Willy is a live woman, a real woman, who has dared to be
+natural and who resembles a little village bride far more than a
+perverse woman of letters_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_Read her book and you shall see how accurate are my assertions. It has
+pleased Madame Colette Willy to embody in a couple of delightful
+animals, the aroma of gardens, the freshness of the field, the heat of
+state-roads,--the passions of men.... For through this girlish laughter
+ringing in the forest, I tell you, I hear the sobbing of a well-spring.
+One does not stoop to a poodle or tom-cat, without feeling the heart
+wrung with dumb anguish. One is sensible, in comparing ourselves to
+them, of all that separates and of all that unites us_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_A dog's eyes hold the sorrow of having, since the earliest days of
+creation, licked the whip of his incorrigible persecutor in vain. For
+nothing has mollified man--not the prey brought him by a famishing
+spaniel, nor the humble guilelessness of the shepherd-dog, guarding the
+peace of the shadowy flocks under the stars_.
+
+_A tragic fear shines in the cat's eyes. "What are you going to do to me
+now?" it seems to ask, lying on a rubbish-heap, a prey to mange and
+hunger--and feverishly it waits the new torture that will shatter its
+nervous system_.
+
+_But have no fear ... Madame Colette Willy is very kind. She quickly
+dispels the hereditary dread of Toby-Dog and Kiki-the-Demure. She
+meliorates the race, so that dogs and cats will learn in the end that it
+is less dull to frequent a poet than an unhappy Collège de France
+candidate--had this candidate proven more copiously still, that the
+author of "Mémoires d'Outre-Tombe" had topsyturvily described the
+jawbone of the Crocodile_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_Toby-Dog and Kiki-the-Demure well
+know that their mistress is a lady who
+would do no harm--neither to a piece of
+sugar nor to a mouse; a lady who, for our
+delight, jumps a rope she has woven of
+flower-words which she never bruises, and
+with which she perfumes us; a lady who sings,
+with the voice of a clear French rivulet, that
+wistful tenderness which makes the hearts of
+animals beat so fast_.
+
+FRANCIS JAMMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+
+
+DRAMATIS PERSONAE
+
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, A Maltese cat.
+TOBY-DOG, A French bull-dog.
+HE, }
+SHE,} Master and Mistress (of minor importance).
+
+
+
+SENTIMENTALITIES
+
+ _The sunny porch_. TOBY-DOG _and_ KIKI-THE-DEMURE _sprawl on the hot
+stone-flags, taking their after luncheon nap. The silence of Sunday
+prevails, yet_ TOBY-DOG _is not asleep: the flies and a heavy luncheon
+torment him. Hind-quarters flattened out frog-fashion, he drags himself
+on his belly up to_ KIKI-THE-DEMURE _whose striped body is perfectly
+quiet_.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Are you asleep?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_purrs feebly_)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Are you even alive? You're so flat! You look like the empty skin of a
+cat.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_in faltering tones_)
+
+L-e-t--m-e--a-l-o-n-e....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Not sick, are you?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No.... Let me alone. I'm asleep. I'm not even conscious of my body. What
+torment to live with you! I've eaten, it's two o'clock, let's sleep.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I can't. Something's made a ball in my stomach. It means to go down I
+guess, but very slowly. And then,--these _flies_, these _flies_! The
+eyes start out of my head at the sight of one of them. I'm all jaws,
+bristling with terrible teeth (just hear them snap), yet the infernal
+things escape me. Oh! my ears! Oh! my poor, sensitive, brown belly! My
+feverish nose! There! ... you see?... right on my nose! _What_ shall I
+do? I squint all I can ... two of them now?... No ... only one ... no,
+two!... I toss them up like bits of sugar and it's the empty air I
+snap.... I'm worn out. I detest the sun, and the flies, and
+everything!...
+
+(_He wails_.)
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_sitting up, his eyes pale from the light and
+sleepiness_)
+
+Well, you've succeeded in waking me. That's all you wanted, isn't it? My
+dreams are gone! These flies that you're pursuing--I hardly felt their
+little teasing feet through my thick fur. The merest touch, like a
+caress, now and then thrilled along the silky sloping hairs which clothe
+me.... But then you never act with any discretion. Your vulgar gayety is
+a nuisance, and when sad you howl like a low comedian.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_bitterly)
+
+_ If you woke up just to tell me _that_--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_correcting_)
+
+Of course you'll remember 'twas _you_ woke me.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I was so uncomfortable, I wanted someone to help me, to give me a word
+of encouragement....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+_I_ don't know any digestive words.
+
+(_Pause_.)
+
+Fancy their giving _me_ a bad character when ... Just examine your
+conscience a bit and compare us. Hunger and heat wear you out and drive
+you mad; cold makes your blood curdle....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_vexed_)
+
+Mine is a sensitive nature.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+A demoniacal nature, you mean!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+No, I don't mean that. You--you're a monstrous egoist.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Perhaps.... You and the Two-Paws don't understand what you're pleased to
+call a cat's egoism.... Our instinct of self-preservation, our dignity,
+our modest reserve, our attitude of weary renunciation (which comes of
+the hopelessness of ever being understood by them), they dub, in
+haphazard fashion, egoism. You're not a very discriminating dog, but at
+least you're free from prejudice. Will _you_ understand me better? A cat
+is a guest in the house, not a plaything. Truly these are strange times
+we're living in! The Two-Paws, He and She, have _they_ alone the right
+to be sad or joyful, to lick plates, to scold, or to go about the house
+indulging their capricious humors? I too have _my_ whims, _my_ sorrows,
+_my_ irregular appetite, _my_ hours of reverie when I wish to be
+alone....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_attentive and conscientious_)
+
+I'm listening, but I can hardly follow what you say. It's so
+complicated--a bit over my head, you know. But you astonish me! Are they
+in the habit of hindering you in your changeful moods? You mew, and they
+open the door. You lie on the paper--the sacred paper He's scratching
+on--He moves away, marvelous condescension!--and leaves you his soiled
+page. You meander up and down his scratching table, obviously in quest
+of mischief, your nose wrinkled up, your tail giving quick little jerks
+back and forth like a pendulum. She watches you laughing, while He
+announces "the promenade of devastation." How then, can you accuse
+Them--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_insincere_)
+
+I don't accuse Them. After all, psychological subtleties are not in your
+line.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Don't speak so fast. I need time to understand. It seems to me--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_slyly_)
+
+Pray, don't hurry! Your digestion might suffer in consequence.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_unconscious of the irony_)
+
+You're right! I've some trouble in expressing myself to-day.--Well, here
+goes: it seems to me that of the two of us it's you they make the most
+of, and yet _you_ do all the grumbling.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+A dog's logic, that! The more one gives the more I demand.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+That's wrong. It's indiscreet.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Not at all. I have a right to everything.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+To everything? And I?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I don't imagine you lack anything, do you?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Ah, I don't know. Sometimes in my very happiest moments, I feel like
+crying. My eyes grow dim, my heart seems to choke me. I would like to be
+sure, in such times of anguish, that everybody loves me; that there is
+nowhere in the world a sad dog behind a closed door, that no evil will
+ever come....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_jeering_)
+
+And _then_ what dreadful thing happens?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+You know very well! Inevitably, at that moment She appears, carrying a
+bottle with horrible yellow stuff floating in it--Castor Oil! Wilful and
+unfeeling, she holds me between her strong knees, opens my jaws--
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Close them tighter!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+But I'm afraid of hurting her--and my tongue, horrified, tastes the
+slimy mawkish stuff. I choke and spit, my poor face is convulsed and the
+end of this torture is long in coming.... You've seen me afterwards
+dragging myself around, melancholy, my head hanging, listening to the
+unwholesome glouglou the oil makes in my stomach....
+
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Once when I was little She tried to give _me_ castor oil. I scratched
+and bit her so, she never tried again. Ha! She must have thought she
+held the devil between her knees. I squirmed, blew fire through my
+nostrils, multiplied my twenty claws by a hundred, my teeth by one
+thousand, and finally--disappeared as if by magic.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I wouldn't dare do that. You see, I love her. I love her enough to
+forgive her even the torture of the bath.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_interested_)
+
+You do? Tell me how it feels. It makes me shiver all over, just to see
+her putting you in the water.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Alas.... Listen then, and pity me. Sometimes, when She's come out of her
+tub with nothing on her but her skin, her soft hairless skin that I lick
+respectfully,--She spills out more warm water, throws in a brown brick
+which smells of tar, and calls, "Toby!" That's enough! The soul quits
+my body; my legs shake under me. Something shines on the water--the
+picture of a window all twisted out of shape--it dances about and blinds
+me. She seizes me, poor swooning thing that I am, and plunges me in....
+Ye Gods! From that time on I'm lost.... My one hope is in her. My eyes
+fasten themselves on hers, while a close warmth sticks to me like
+another skin on top of mine.... The brick's all foamy now ... I smell
+tar ... my eyes and nostrils smart ... there are storms in my ears. She
+grows excited, breathes loud and fast, laughs, and scrubs me
+light-heartedly. At last She rescues me, fishing me out by the nape of
+my neck, I paw the air, begging for life; then comes the rough towel and
+the warm coverlet where, exhausted, I relish my convalescence....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_deeply impressed_)
+
+Calm yourself.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Jove! The telling it alone!... But--you old sly-boots--didn't I see her
+one day armed with a sponge standing over _you,_ holding _you_ down on
+the toilet table?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_quite embarrassed, lashing his tail_)
+
+An old story! The long, fluffy hairs on my legs (which give them the
+outline of a Zouave's) had somehow gotten dirty. She insisted upon
+washing me. I persuaded her that I suffered atrociously under the
+sponge....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What a fibber you are! Did She believe you?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+'Um ... at first. It was my own fault tho' when She didn't. Turned over
+on my back, I proffered the candid belly, the terrified and forgiving
+eyes of a lamb about to be sacrificed. I felt a slight coolness, nothing
+more. A fear that my sensibilities might be destroyed, took possession
+of me. My rhythmical wailings increased, then subsided, then went up
+again like the noise of the sea (you know the strength of my voice). I
+imitated the calf, the whipped child, the cat in the night, the wind
+under the door. Little by little I grew enraptured with my own song, so
+that long after She had finished soiling me with cold water I continued
+wailing, my eyes fixed on the ceiling. Then She laughed tactlessly and
+cried out, "You're as untruthful as a woman!"
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_with conviction_)
+
+That _was_ annoying.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I was angry with her the entire afternoon.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh, as to sulking, you do your share! _I_ never can. I forget injuries.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_dryly_)
+
+You lick the hand that chastens you. Oh it's well known!
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_gullible_)
+
+I lick the hand that--yes, that's it exactly.--An awfully pretty
+expression.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Not mine.... Dignity doesn't trouble _you_ any! My word! I'm often
+ashamed for you. You love everybody. You take all sorts of rebuffs
+without even raising your back. You're as pleasant and as banal as a
+public garden.
+
+TOBY-DOG  Don't you believe it, you ill-bred cat! You think you know
+everything and you don't understand simple politeness. Frankly now,
+would you have me snarl at His or Her friends' heels,--well-dressed
+people who know my name (lots of people _I_ don't know know my name) and
+good-naturedly pull my ears?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I hate new faces.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I don't love them either--whatever you say. I love--Her and Him.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+And I, Him--and Her.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh, I guessed _your_ preference long ago. There's a sort of secret
+understanding between you two--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_smiling mysteriously and abandoning himself to his
+reverie_)
+
+An understanding, yes--secret and profound. He rarely speaks but makes a
+noise like a mouse, scratching his paper. It's for Him I've treasured up
+my little heart, my precious cat's heart, and He, without words, has
+given me his. This exchange makes me happy and reserved. Now and then
+with that pretty, wayward, ruling instinct which makes us cats rivals of
+women, I try my power over him. When we are alone, I point my ears
+forward devilishly as a sign that I'm about to spring upon his
+scratching paper. The tap, tap, tap of my paws straight through pens and
+letters and everything scattered about, is addressed to him as well as
+the insistent miauling when I beg for liberty. "Hymn to the Door-Knob,"
+He laughingly calls it, or "The Plaint of the Sequestered Cat." The
+tender contemplation of my inspiring eyes is for him alone; they weigh
+on his bent head, until the look I'm calling searches and meets mine in
+a shock of souls, so foreseen and so sweet, that I must needs close my
+lids to hide the exquisite shyness I feel.
+
+As for Her, she flutters about too much, often jostles me, holds my paws
+together and rocks me in the air, pets me in excited fashion, laughs
+aloud at me, imitates my voice too well--
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_moved with indignation_)
+
+You're very hard to please! I certainly love Him; he's good and pretends
+not to see my faults, so that he won't have to scold, but She's the most
+beautiful thing in the world to me, the dearest and--the most difficult
+to understand. The sound of her step enchants me, her changeful eyes
+dispense happiness--and trouble. She's like Destiny itself, she never
+hesitates. Even torture from her hands--you know how She teases me?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE  Cruelly.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+No, not cruelly, but artfully. I never can tell what's coming next. This
+morning She bent down as if to speak to me, lifted one of my "tiny
+elephant's ears," as She calls them, and sent a sharp cry into it, which
+went to the very back of my brain.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Horrors!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Was it right or wrong? I can't decide even now. It started waves of
+nervousness running madly through me. Then, She has a fancy for making
+me do tricks. Almost every day I must--"Do the Fish, Toby dear." She
+lifts me in her arms and squeezes me until I gasp. My poor dumb mouth
+opens as a carp's does when they're drowning it in air....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+That's _just_ like Her!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Suddenly I find myself free--and still alive, miraculously saved by the
+power of her will. How beautiful life seems to me then! How fondly I
+lick the hand hanging at her side, the hem of her dress!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_contemptuously_)
+
+A pretty thing to do!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+All good and all evil come to me from Her. She is my worst torment and
+my one sure refuge. When I run to her, my heart sick with fear, how soft
+her arms are and how sweet her hair, falling in my face! I'm her
+"black-baby," her "Toby-Dog," her "little bit o' love." She sits on the
+ground to reassure me, making herself little like me--lies down
+altogether and I go wild with delight at the sight of her face under
+mine, thrown back in her fragrant hair. My feelings overflow, I can't
+resist such a chance for a jolly good game. I rummage and fumble about,
+excitedly poking my nose everywhere, till I find the crispy tip of a
+pink ear--Her ear. I nibble it just enough to tickle her--to make her
+cry out: "Stop, Toby! That's awful! Help! Help! This dog's devouring
+me!"
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+H'm! Simple, homely, wholesome joys! ... And then, off you go to make
+friends with the cook.
+
+TOBY-DOG  And you,--with the cat at the farm.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_coldly_)
+
+Enough I pray, that concerns no one but myself ... and the little cat.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+A pretty conquest! It should make you blush--a seven-months-old kitten!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_roused_)
+
+For me she has all the charm of forbidden fruit and no one dare steal
+her from me. She is slim as a bean-pole....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_aside_)
+
+You old rascal!  KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+... and long; poised on long legs she walks with the uncertain step
+common to all young things. She hunts field-mice, shrew-mice--even
+partridge, and this hard work in the fields has toughened her young
+muscles and given a rather gloomy expression to her kitten-face.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+She's ugly.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No, not ugly, but odd-looking. Her muzzle with its very pink nostrils
+strongly resembles that of a goat, her large ears remind one of a
+peasant's coif, her eyes the color of old gold are set slant-wise, and
+their naturally keen expression is varied by an occasional piquant
+squint.
+
+With what a will does she fly me confounding modesty with fear! I pass
+slowly by (one would think me quite uninterested), draped in my splendid
+coat. She's struck by its stripes. Oh, she'll come back, a little
+love-sick kitten, and putting aside all constraint she'll throw herself
+at my feet--like a supple white scarf--
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I've no objection, you know.... I'm comparatively indifferent to all
+that concerns love. Here my time's so completely filled ... physical
+exercise ... my cares of watch-dog, I ... hardly give a thought to the
+bagatelle.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_aside)
+
+Bagatelle!... He indulges in the persiflage of a traveling salesman!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I love--Her and Him devotedly, with a love that lifts me up to them. It
+suffices to occupy my time and heart.
+
+The hour of our siesta is passing, my scornful friend. Do you know, I
+like you in spite of your scorn and you like me, too. Don't turn your
+head away, your peculiar modesty would hide what you call frailty and
+what I call love. Do you think me blind? How often, on coming back to
+the house with Her, have I seen your little triangular face at the
+window, light up and smile at my approach,--the time to open the door
+and you'd already put on your cat's mask--your pretty Japanesy mask,
+with its narrow eyes.... Isn't it so?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_resolved not to hear_)
+
+The hour of the siesta is passing. The cone-shaped shadows of the pear
+trees grow long on the gravel path. We've talked away our sleepiness.
+You've forgotten the flies, your uneasy stomach, and the heat which
+dances in waves on the meadows. The beautiful, sultry day is dying.
+Already there's a breeze bringing perfume from the pines. Their trunks
+are melting into bright tears....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Here She is! She's left her wicker chair, stretched her lovely arms and,
+judging from the movement of her dress, I think we're going to take a
+walk. See her behind the rosebushes? Now, with her nails she breaks a
+leaf from the lemon tree; she's crumpling it up and smelling it. Ah ...
+I belong to Her, soul and body. With my eyes closed I can divine her
+presence.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Yes, I see Her. She is quiet and gentle for the time being. He'll leave
+his paper now to follow her. He'll come out calling, "Where are you?"
+and sit on the bench, tired out. For _him_, I shall rise politely, and
+go "do my nails" along the leg of his trousers. Silent, happy
+companions, we'll listen for the day's departing footsteps. The perfume
+of the lindens will become sickeningly sweet at the same hour that my
+seer's eyes grow big and black and read mysterious Signs in the air....
+Later on a calm fire will be lit down there, behind the pointed
+mountain--a circle of glistening rose-color in the gray-blue of the
+night--a sort of luminous cocoon from which will burst the dazzling edge
+of the moon. She will sail along, cleaving the clouds.... Then, it will
+be time to go to rest. He'll carry me in on his shoulder and I'll sleep
+close to his feet, which are ever mindful of my repose.... Dawn will
+find me shivering but rejuvenated, sitting face to the sun, in a silvery
+halo of incense, offered me by the dew. Thus, I am a perfect picture of
+the god I was in the old, old days.
+
+
+
+
+ON THE TRAIN
+
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, TOBY-DOG, SHE _and_ HE, _have taken their places in a
+first-class compartment. The train rolls along towards distant
+mountains, and the freedom of Summer-time_. TOBY, _on a leash, lifts an
+inquiring nose to the window_. HE _has strewn the carriage with
+newspapers_: KIKI-THE-DEMURE, _silent and invisible in a closed basket,
+is under his immediate protection_. SHE, _leaning back against the dusty
+cushions, dreams of the mountain she loves best and of the low house on
+it, weighted down with jasmine and virginia-creeper_.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+How fast this carriage goes! It can't be our regular coachman. I haven't
+seen the horses, but they smell very bad and make black smoke. Oh,
+Silent Dreamer, look at me and tell me--shall we arrive soon?
+
+(_No response_. TOBY _gets fidgety and blows through his nostrils_.)
+SHE
+
+Hush! Toby, hush!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I've hardly said a word.... Shall we arrive soon?
+
+(_He turns towards his master, who is reading, and puts a discreet paw
+on the edge of his knee_.)
+
+HE
+
+'Sh!...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_resigned_)
+
+Hard luck! No one wants to talk to me. I'm bored and what's more, I
+don't know this carriage well enough. I'm tired out. They woke me very
+early this morning. I amused myself by running all over the house. They
+had hidden the chairs under sheets, wrapped up the lamps, rolled up the
+rugs. Things were white and changed and awful. There was a horrid smell
+of camphor everywhere. My eyes filled with water, I sneezed under the
+chairs and slid on the bare floor in my haste to follow the maids' white
+aprons. They bustled about among trunks with such unwonted zeal, that I
+was sure something exceptional was going to happen. At the last minute
+just as She came in, calling: "Toby's collar and the cat's basket!
+Quick! put the cat in his basket!"--just as she was saying that, my chum
+disappeared. It was indescribable! He, terrible to see, swore by all the
+gods, and struck the floor with his cane, furious because they had
+allowed his Kiki to get away. She called "Kiki!" at first
+supplicatingly, then in threatening tones, and the maids brought empty
+plates, meant to deceive, and yellow paper from the butcher's. I really
+thought my chum had left this world, when suddenly--there he was perched
+on top of the book-case, looking down on us with an expression of
+contempt in his green eyes. She put up her arms: "Kiki _will_ you come
+down immediately! You are going to make us lose the train!" But he
+didn't come down and it made me dizzy--though I was on the ground--to
+see him way up there walking and turning about and miauling shrilly to
+tell us how impossible he found it to obey. He was about frantic and
+kept saying: "Heavens, he's going to fall." But She smiled skeptically,
+went out of the room and came back armed with the whip. The whip said,
+"crack!" twice only; then a miracle happened I think, 'cause the cat
+leaped to the floor, softer and more bouncey than our plaything, the
+ball of wool. _I_ would have broken to pieces falling like that!... He
+has been in this basket ever since.... (TOBY _goes to the basket_.) Ah!
+here's a little peek-hole.... I see his whiskers ... they're like white
+needles. Whew! What eyes! (_He jumps back_.) I'm rather afraid. One
+can't really shut a cat up; he always manages to get out somehow. ... He
+must suffer, poor fellow! Perhaps if I speak kindly to him ... (_he
+calls very politely_) Cat!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_spitting furiously_)
+
+Khhh!...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_jumping back_)
+
+Oh, you said a bad word! You look awful! Have you a pain anywhere?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Go away! I'm a martyr.... Go away I tell you, or I'll blow fire at you!
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_ingenuous_)
+
+But why?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Why!--Because you're free, because I'm in this basket, because the
+basket's in a foul carriage which is shaking me to pieces, and because
+the serenity of those two exasperates me.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Would you like me to look out and tell you what one sees from the
+carriage window?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Everything is equally odious to me.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_having looked out, comes back_)
+
+I haven't seen anything....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_bitterly_)
+
+Thanks just the same.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I mean I haven't seen anything that's easy to describe. Some green
+things which pass right close to us--so close and so fast that they give
+one a slap in the eye. A flat field turning 'round and 'round and over
+there, a little pointed steeple--it's running as fast as the carriage.
+Another field all red with blossoming clover has just given me another
+slap in the eye--a red slap. The earth is sinking in--or else we're
+going up, I'm not sure which. I see way off, _far_ away, some green
+lawns dotted with white daisies--perhaps they're cows.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_with sarcasm_)
+
+Or wafers, for sealing letters--or anything you like.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Aren't you the least little bit amused?  KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_with a
+sinister laugh_)
+
+Ha! Ask of the damned ...
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Of whom?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_more and more melodramatic, but without conviction_)
+
+... of the damned in his vat of boiling oil, if anything amuses him!
+Mine is not physical torment. I suffer imprisonment, humiliation,
+darkness, neglect--
+
+(_The train stops. A conductor on the platform cries "Aw-ll a-bor!!...
+awl aborr!!"_)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_bewildered_)
+
+Someone's crying out! There's an accident!! Let's run!!!
+
+(_He throws himself against the carriage door and scratches madly at
+it_.)  SHE, (_half asleep_)
+
+Toby dear, you're a nuisance!
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_distracted_)
+
+Oh, you inexplicable person! How can you sit there quietly? Don't you
+hear those cries? They're stopping now--the accident has gone away. Wish
+I'd known ...
+
+(_The train starts again_.)
+
+HE, (_throwing down his paper_)
+
+The poor beast is hungry.
+
+SHE, (_now very wide awake_)
+
+You think so? Well, I am too. But Toby is to eat very little.
+
+HE, (_anxiously_)
+
+And Kiki-the-Demure?
+
+SHE, (_peremptorily_)  Kiki sulks, and he hid this morning, so he'll
+have even less than Toby.
+
+HE
+
+He isn't making a sound. Aren't you afraid he's sick?
+
+SHE
+
+No, he's simply vexed.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_as soon as there's question of himself_)
+
+Me-ow!
+
+HE, (_tenderly and eagerly_)
+
+Come my beautiful Kiki, my imprisoned one, come. You shall have cold
+roast-beef and some breast of chicken ...
+
+(_He opens the prison basket and_ KIKI _puts forth his_ _head, flattened
+on top like that of a serpent; then his long, striped body, cautiously,
+and so very slowly that one begins to think it's coming out by the
+yard_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_pleasantly)
+
+Ah, there you are, cat! Well, now, proclaim your freedom!
+
+(KIKI, _without replying, smoothes his ruffled fur_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Proclaim your freedom I tell you! It's the custom. Whenever a door is
+opened one must run, jump, twist oneself into half circles and cry out.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+_One_? Who's one, pray?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+We dogs.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_seated and very dignified_)
+
+Would you have me _bark_, too?... We have never followed the same rules
+of conduct, that I know of.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_vexed_)
+
+Oh very well, I don't insist. How do you like this carriage?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_sniffing fastidiously_)
+
+It's frightful.--However, the cushions are rather good for one's nails.
+
+(_He suits the action to the word_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_aside_)
+
+Now if _I_ did that ...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_continuing to scratch the upholstery_)
+
+Hon! May this spongy, gray cloth soothe my rage!... Since morning, the
+whole universe has been in a state of monstrous revolt. He whom I love,
+and who venerates me, made not the least effort to defend me. I've
+submitted to humiliating contacts, been jolted to death, piercing
+whistles have shot through my head from ear to ear. Ho, ho, how good it
+is to relax the nerves and to imagine that, with gleeful claws, one
+tears the enemies' flesh in bloody shreds! Ho, ho! S-c-r-a-t-c-h, and
+lift the paws on high! Lift them high as possible! It's a supremely
+insolent gesture....
+
+SHE
+
+I say, Kiki, when are you going to stop that?
+
+HE, (_Indulgent and admiring_)
+
+Let him alone. He's doing his nails.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+He has spoken for me. I forgive him. But since it's allowed, I don't
+care any more about tearing the cushions ... When will I get out of
+this? Not that I'm afraid; they are both there, and the dog too, with
+their everyday faces ... I've twinges in my stomach.
+
+(_He yawns. The train stops. A conductor on the platform cries, "Aw-ll
+a-bor! Aw-ll a-b-o-r-r!!"_)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_excited_)
+
+Screaming again! Another accident?!--Let's run!...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Heavens, what a tiresome dog! What does it matter to him, if there _is_
+an accident?
+
+I don't believe in it moreover. It's the cry of a man, and men cry out
+for the pleasure of hearing their own voices.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_calm again_)
+
+I'm hungry. Can't we hope to eat soon, my mistress? I don't know what
+time it is in this strange country, but it seems to me....
+
+SHE
+
+Come now, we'll all have our luncheon.
+
+(_She takes the things out of the basket, crumples up some tissue paper
+and breaks a crisp brown roll_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_chewing_)
+
+What She gave me then must have been very good indeed to seem such a
+tiny bit. It melted in my mouth, there's not even the memory of it
+left....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_chewing_)
+
+Breast of chicken! Purr-rr ... Goodness me! I was purring without
+knowing it! That won't do. They'll think me resigned to this journey. I
+must eat slowly, grim, and undeceived, eat for the sole purpose of
+keeping myself alive ...
+
+SHE, (_to the dog and cat_)
+
+Allow me to have _my_ luncheon now, if you please. _I_ too, like cold
+chicken and the hearts of lettuce, dipped in salt....
+
+HE, (_anxiously_)
+
+What _shall_ we do to make this cat go into his basket again?
+
+SHE
+
+I don't know. We'll see presently ...
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Finished already? I could swallow three times that much. I say Cat,
+you're eating rather well for a martyr.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_fibbing_)
+
+Trouble digs a hole in one's interior. Move away please, I want to sleep
+now ... if I can. Perhaps a merciful dream will take me back to the
+house I've left, to the flowered cushion He gave me.... Home! sweet
+home! Rugs of bright colors for the delight of my eyes, a palm with
+nice shoots for me to eat, deep arm-chairs, under which I hide my woolen
+ball as a future surprise for myself--ah, and the cork hanging by a
+string to the door-latch! the tables covered with bibelots! I thread my
+way in and out among them and occasionally it amuses me to break some
+brittle thing. The dining-room is a temple! The vestibule, full of
+mystery; there unseen, I can watch those who come and go ... Oh narrow
+back-stairway, where the step of the milkman rings out for me like a
+morning angelus--farewell! farewell! my destiny carries me on, and who
+knows if ever ... But this is _too_ sad! All the pretty things I've been
+saying have really begun to make me feel badly!!
+
+(_He begins a minute and mournful toilet. The train stops. A conductor
+on the platform cries, "Aw-ll-a-borr-a-borr!!"_)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+There it is again! An acci--Oh bother, I've had enough of that!
+
+HE, (_anxiously_)
+
+We're going to change trains in ten minutes. How about the cat? He'll
+never allow us to shut him up ...
+
+SHE
+
+We'll see ... Suppose we put some meat in his basket?
+
+HE
+
+Or perhaps petting would ...
+
+(_They approach the redoubtable_ KIKI _and both speak together_.)
+
+HE
+
+Kiki, my beautiful Kiki, come jump on my knee, or on my shoulder. You
+like that as a rule. You'll doze there and then I'll put you gently into
+the basket. After all, it's open-work and has a comfortable cushion to
+protect you from the rough wicker. Come, my dear....
+
+SHE
+
+Listen, Kiki. You must learn to act properly and to take life as it is.
+You can't stay there like that. We're going to change trains and a
+horrible guard will appear and say insulting things of you and your
+race. Besides you'd better obey, because if you don't, I--I'll give you
+a good whipping.
+
+(_But before she can lift her hand against his sacred fur, Kiki gets up,
+stretches himself, arches his back, yawns,--to show the rosy lining of
+his mouth, and then walks to the open basket where he lies down with an
+admirable air of quiet insolence. He and She exchange eloquent
+glances_.)
+
+
+
+
+DINNER IS LATE
+
+
+_A parlor, in the country, at the close of a long summer's day_.
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE _and_ TOBY-DOG _doze; ears twitching and eyelids
+obstinately shut. Now_ KIKI'S _lids part in a narrow slit, and disclose
+eyes the color of purple grapes. He yawns, with the ferocious
+expression of a small dragon._
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_haughtily_)
+
+You're snoring!
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_who was not really asleep_)
+
+I'm not; it's you.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Impossible! I don't snore, I purr.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Same thing.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_not condescending to a discussion_)
+
+Thank heaven, it isn't! (_A silence_.)
+
+I'm hungry. One doesn't hear the noise of plates in the next room. Isn't
+it dinner time?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_gets up, slowly stretches his forepaws and yawns, darting
+forth a heraldic tongue with curly end_) I don't know ... I'm hungry.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Where is She? How is it you're not at her heels?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_embarrassed, nibbling his nails_)
+
+She's in the garden I believe, picking up plums.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Those yellow balls that rain about one's ears? I know them. You've seen
+her then? I bet She scolded you ... What have you been doing now?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_self-conscious, turning away his wrinkled, toad-like face_)
+
+She told me to return to the house because--because I too, was eating
+plums.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+She did well! You have depraved tastes--the tastes of men.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_offended_)
+
+Say--no one ever sees me eating bad fish! And never, _never_ will I
+understand how you can go into such fits over a dead frog, or that herb.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Valerian.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+That's it, I guess ... An herb--is medicine, isn't it?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Medicine, indeed! Valerian ... but no _you_, can't understand ... I've
+seen Her laugh and go on, as I do over the valerian, after having
+emptied a glass of fetid wine that jumped dangerously too. As for the
+dead frog--so dead that it seems a bit of dry russia leather in the form
+of a frog--it's a sachet, impregnated with rare musk, with which I wish
+to scent my fur.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh, you talk very well--but She always scolds and says that you smell
+bad after it, and He says the same thing.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+They're nothing but Two-Paws, both of them. You, poor thing, belittle
+yourself by seeking to imitate them. You stand on your hind legs, wear a
+coat when it rains, eat plums--for shame!--and those big green balls,
+the malicious trees let fall sometimes, when I'm passing underneath.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Apples?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Very likely. She picks one up and throws it down the path, crying:
+"Apple, Toby, apple," and you rush after, in unseemly fashion, gasping
+for breath, looking like a fool, your tongue and your eyes sticking
+out....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_scowling, head resting on his paws_)
+
+One takes one's pleasures where one finds them.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_yawning, shows his pointed teeth and his palate of
+pink velvet_)
+
+I'm hungry. Dinner is surely late tonight. Suppose you look for Her?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I daren't. She forbade it. She is down there in the hollow, with a big
+basket. The dew is falling and wetting her feet and the sun's going
+away. But you know how She is. She sits on the damp ground, looking
+ahead of her, as if She were asleep--or lies flat on her stomach,
+whistling and watching an ant in the grass ... She tears up a handful of
+wild thyme and smells it, or calls the tomtits and the jays--who never
+come to her by any chance. She takes a heavy watering pot and--ugh! it
+gives me the shivers--pours thousands of icy, silvery threads over the
+roses or into the hollows of those little stone troughs, 'way back in
+the woods. I always look in to see the head of a brindle-bull who comes
+to meet me and to drink up the pictures of the leaves, but She pulls me
+back by the collar with: "Toby, Toby, _that_ water is for the birds."
+... Then She takes out her knife and opens nuts, fifty, a _hundred_
+nuts, and forgets the time ... There's no end to the things She does.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_slyly_)
+
+And what do you do all that time?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I--well--I just wait for her.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I admire you!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Once in a while, squatting down, She eagerly scratches the earth, toils
+and sweats over it; then I jump 'round her, delighted to see her at
+something so useful and so familiar. But her feeble scent deceives her.
+_I_ never smell mole, or shrew-mouse-of-the-rosy-paws, in the holes
+_She_ digs. And how explain her utter lack of purpose? Presently,
+falling back on her haunches, She brandishes a hairy-rooted herb and
+cries: "I have it, the jade!" I lie in the damp grass and tremble, or
+dig my nose (She calls it my snout) into the earth to get the
+complicated odors of it. ... When there are three or four scents all
+blended, all mixed together, can you distinguish that of the mole from
+that of the hare which passed quickly, or the bird which rested there?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Certainly I can. My nose is highly educated. It's small, regular, wide
+between my eyes, delicate at the chamois-skin end of my nostrils; the
+lightest touch of a blade of grass, the shadow of smoke tickles and
+makes it sneeze. It doesn't bother about distinguishing the scent of
+moles from that of--hares, did you say? But it delights in the trace
+left by a cat in a hedge ... I've a charming nose. She calls it, "his
+pretty little nose of cotton velvet." Since my eyes opened on this world
+I've not known the day that someone has not uttered a truthful flattery
+on the subject of my nose. Now yours--is a rough-grained truffle. What
+makes you move it so ridiculously? At this very moment.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'm hungry and I don't hear the plates.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+... your truffle of a nose works up and down and makes another wrinkle
+in your irregular mug.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+She always says, "his square muzzle, his wrinkled truffle," so tenderly
+and so lovingly!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+... And you think of nothing but eating.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+It's _your_ empty stomach that scolds and complains and wants to quarrel
+with me.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I've a charming stomach.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+But no, it's your nose that's charming. You just said so.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+My stomach too. There's none more fastidious, more whimsical, stronger
+and at the same time more delicate. It digests the bones of sole, but
+meat that's the least bit tainted literally turns it.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Literally's the word. You have _active_ indigestion.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Yes, the whole house is affected by it. From the very first qualms I'm
+in terrible distress; the earth gives way under me, my eyes dilate, I
+hurriedly swallow quantities of salty saliva; involuntary, ventriloquial
+cries escape me, my sides bulge out--
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_disgusted_)
+
+I say, if it's all the same to you, tell me the rest after dinner.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I'm hungry. Where can He be?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+He's there, in his study, scratching paper.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+He's always doing that. It's a game. Two-Paws play at the same thing for
+hours and hours. I've often tried to scratch paper gently, as He does,
+but the pleasure doesn't last long. I prefer newspapers torn into shreds
+that rustle and fly ... There is a little pot of dark-violet, muddy
+water on his table. I never sniff it without horror, since the day a
+rather foolish curiosity made me dip my paw into it. This very paw, so
+strong and aristocratic, (the tufts of useless hair you see between my
+toes proclaim the purity of my race) this very paw bore a bluish stain
+for eight days and the degrading odor of rusty steel clung to it a long
+time after ...
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What's the little pot for?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+He drinks from it doubtless.
+
+(_Silence_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+She's not back yet! Heaven grant She isn't lost, as I was one day in the
+streets of Paris!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I'm hungry!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'm hungry! What are we going to eat this evening?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I saw a chicken. It made a silly noise and dropped red blood on the
+kitchen floor, soiling it far more than I ever did, or you either--yet
+no one whipped it. But Emily put it in the fire, to teach it a lesson. I
+licked up some of the blood ...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_yawns_)
+
+Chicken ... it makes my mouth water. She'll say: "Here Toby, bones!" and
+throw me the carcass.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+How badly you speak! He says: "Little chicken bones, Kiki, little
+chicken bones!"
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_surprised_)
+
+But no _really_ it's, "Here, Toby, bones!" that She says.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+He speaks better than She does.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_incompetent_)
+
+Ah?... Tell me, do birds taste anything like chicken?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_whose eyes light up suddenly_)
+
+No ... they're far better, they're alive. Ha, the quivering bird, the
+warm feathers, the delicious little brain ... you feel it all crackling
+between your teeth!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh, you make me sick! It always worries me to see tiny animals like that
+flutter about ... and birds are dear, good little things.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_dryly_)
+
+Don't you believe it, they're only good to eat. They're noisy, stupid
+creatures, infatuated with themselves, _made_ to be eaten. ... You know
+the two jays?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Not very well.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE They live in the little wood. When I walk by they laugh
+a sardonic "tiac, tiac," because I wear a bell at my neck. In vain do I
+hold my head very stiffly and put my paws down _very_ gently, my bell
+tinkles and the two creatures scream from the top of the fir-tree. Just
+let me get hold of them, one of these days!...
+
+(_He lays back his ears and raises the hair along his back_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_pensive_) Positively, Cat, there are times when I don't know
+you. We are talking quietly and suddenly you bristle like a
+bottle-brush; or we happen to be playing amicably together and I bark
+behind your back--bow, wow-wow!--just for fun; then,--one doesn't know
+why, perhaps because my nose has grazed the long hairs on your legs
+you're so proud of--you become all at once a savage beast, spitting
+fire, and charging at me like a strange dog. Don't you think that shows
+a bad character?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_mysterious, eyes half-closed_)
+
+Not at all. It's character, simply. A Cat's character. In such moments
+of irritability, I'm keenly alive to the humiliation of my present
+state, and that of my race.
+
+I can remember a time when priests in long, linen tunics, bending low,
+spoke to us and humbly tried to comprehend our chanted utterance. Know,
+dog, that it is not _we_ who have changed! It may be, there are days
+when I'm more myself, when everything offends me, and justly; a brusque
+gesture, a vulgar laugh, the banging of a door, your odor, your
+inconceivable impudence when you touch me, or encircle me, jumping and
+yelping ...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_patiently, to himself_)
+
+He's having one of his attacks.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_with a start_)
+
+Did you hear?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Yes, the kitchen door, and the door into the dining-room ... and now the
+drawer where the spoons are kept. At last! At last! aaah! (_He yawns_.)
+I can't stand this any longer. _Where_ is She? I don't hear the gravel
+creaking ... night's coming on!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_ironically_)
+
+Go find her.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+And how about Him? He usually worries, and comes in asking, "Where is
+She?" But He's scratching still. He must have drunk up all the
+violet-colored water in the muddy little pot by this time. (TOBY
+_carefully stretches his legs_.) Ah! I feel lively ... and empty. We're
+going to eat soon! Just smell the good kitchen-smells that come under
+the door!... Let's play!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Run, I'll chase, without touching you.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Why not?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I don't want to.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh! but you're tiresome! Watch me jump and arch my neck like a little
+horse and try to catch my stubby tail. Now I turn 'round and
+'round--and--heavens! the whole room spins!--It's--st--opping--now.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Insufferable creature!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Insufferable yourself! Look out, I'm going to run at you as She does,
+when She's merry, crying "Ha, cat!"
+
+(KIKI-THE-DEMURE, _without rising, puts up a paw bristling with claws
+and spotted underneath with rose color and black; it looks like a thorny
+flower_.)
+
+If you dare!...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_in a frenzy_)  I do dare! Bow-wow-wow! Ha, cat! ha, cat!
+
+(KIKI-THE-DEMURE, _exasperated, gives a spring and hangs on the
+table-cloth, slowly dragging it down. A lamp and various things fall to
+the ground. Terrified silence. The two animals, crouching under an
+arm-chair, await punishment_.)
+
+HE _appears at the study door, holding a pen, like a bit, between his
+teeth_.
+
+Thunder and blitzen! What is it now? This cursed menagerie has
+overturned everything! Where's your Mistress? What a place this is to be
+sure! Dinner never on time!... (etc., etc., etc....)
+
+(_The two guilty ones, who well know the harmlessness of such outbursts,
+laugh quietly to themselves and lying flat as bed-room slippers, look at
+one another through the fringes of the chair. The garden gate opens_.
+
+SHE _comes in carrying a basket, full of fragrant plums; her hands are
+sticky from their sugariness, her hair tumbled_. SHE _stands horrified,
+before the disaster_.)
+
+SHE
+
+Oh! They've been fighting again, have they? (_Without conviction_.) Dear
+_me,_ what nasty creatures! I'll give them away! I'll sell them!!--I'll
+_kill_ them!!! (_But the cat and dog, groveling in exaggerated humility,
+crawl up to her, and speak together_.)
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Purr-rr-rr!...There you are!...It's very late ...Toby attacked me; it's
+he who's broken everything. I believe he went mad from hunger.... You
+smell good, of grass and the twilight. You sat down on some wild thyme.
+Come!...Tell your Master to carry me on his shoulder--the meat will be
+overdone, I'm afraid. You'll carve the chicken very quickly, won't you,
+and you'll keep the browned skin for me? If you wish I'll stretch out my
+paw like a spoon, which knows how to take up the littlest morsels, and
+carry them to my mouth with that human gesture that makes you laugh
+so--you and He.... Come!
+
+TOBY-DOG  Hiii ... hiii ... there you are at last! I'm so unhappy when
+you're away. You banished me ... you didn't love me ... The lamp fell
+down all by itself ... Come! I'm awfully hungry, but I'll gladly go
+without dinner, if you'll promise to take me with you always wherever
+you go ... yes, even out in the twilight, though it makes me sad, I'll
+willingly follow you there ... my nose close, close to the hem of your
+dress....
+
+SHE, (_disarmed and quite indifferent to the cataclysm_)
+
+Do look how pretty they are!
+
+
+
+
+SHE IS ILL
+
+ _A bed-room in the country-house; autumnal sunshine filters in through
+closed blinds_. SHE _lies on a couch, apparently asleep, dressed in a
+white woolen gown_. KIKI-THE-DEMURE _makes his toilet on a narrow
+console-table_. TOBY-DOG, _on the carpet, in a sphinx-like attitude,
+watches_ HER _and at the same time, is attentive to the words of his
+master, who is leaving the room on tip-toe._
+
+HE, (_in a very low voice to the two animals_)
+
+Sh! Don't wake her. Be good. I'm going downstairs, to write.
+
+(_He closes the door noiselessly after him_.)  TOBY-DOG, (_to_
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE)
+
+What did He say?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I don't know. Something vague. Directions, like: stay there, good-by.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+He said, "'Sh!" _I'm_ not making any noise.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_ironically_)
+
+They're astonishing! They say "no noise," and thereupon walk off with a
+step a deaf rat could hear two miles away.
+
+TOBY-DOG  Some truth in that. (_He looks at the sleeping figure on the
+couch_.) Her face still looks very small. She's asleep. If you jump down
+from that table don't land with a big thump.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_stiffly_)
+
+Ah, you're teaching me to jump now, are you? Oh, worthy counselor!
+(_quoting_) Put a beggar in your barn and he'll make himself your heir.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What's that?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Nothing. An Oriental proverb. If I wished, dog, to disturb the silence
+of this room I'd be clever enough to choose a rickety chair; its feet
+would pound out a regular tic-toc, tic-toc, tic-toc, in time with my
+tongue as I washed myself. It's a means I've invented to gain my
+liberty. Tic-toc, tic-toc, says the chair. She happens to be reading or
+writing, is easily irritated, and cries, "Be quiet, Kiki!" But I go on
+unconscious of any wrong-doing; tic-toc, tic-toc. She jumps up
+distracted and opens the door wide for me: slowly, like one exiled, I
+cross its threshold and once outside, laugh to find myself so superior
+to them all.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_who hasn't been listening, yawns_)
+
+What a sad week, eh? I don't know what it is to take a walk any more. I
+haven't taken any pleasure in eating either, since She fell from her
+horse.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Heavens, one can love people and care for one's stomach too.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_with ardor_)
+
+Not I! When She screamed and fell from her horse, I felt the heart
+crack inside me.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+That affair couldn't have ended otherwise. One doesn't go climbing up on
+a horse! People don't do such things! I see nothing but extravagance
+around me. To begin with, a horse is a fearful monstrosity.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_indignantly_)
+
+Did one ever hear the like!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_peremptorily_)
+
+I happen to have had the opportunity of making a very close study of
+one....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_aside_)
+
+He makes me laugh!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+... It was the farmer's horse that grazed in the meadow. My life, for a
+whole month, was embittered by that roving mountain. Lying under the
+hedge, I could see his heavy feet disfiguring the ground. I breathed
+his vulgar odor and heard his strident cry shaking the air. Once when he
+was eating the lower twigs of the hedge, I saw myself--the whole of
+me--reflected in one of his eyes! I fled ... and from that day my hatred
+was so strong that I wildly hoped to annihilate the monster. I'll go up
+to him, thought I, I'll plant myself firmly in front of him, and the
+desire of his death will be so strong in my eyes, that perhaps, he'll
+die when he meets my look ...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_diverted_)
+
+And then?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_continuing_)
+
+I carried out my plan. But the horse I had waited for in fear and
+trembling, just blew through his nostrils a long jet of foul-smelling
+vapor, and _I_ fell back in atrocious convulsions.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_Inwardly writhing with laughter_)
+
+You don't exaggerate?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_serious_)
+
+Never! And She must needs go climbing on a horse's back, holding fast to
+four cords, one leg this side and the other that. ... Strange
+aberration!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+We don't think alike, Cat. For me, the horse is, after man, the most
+beautiful thing in the world.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_vexed_)  And where do I come in?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_evasive and courteous_)
+
+Oh, you're a _Cat_. But a horse, and with Her on his back! What a
+beautiful picture they make, high up in the blue air! To gaze on it, I
+have to throw my head 'way back on my thick neck. The horse lends her
+his speed. Now at last, She can race with me when I go off on a mad run.
+Sometimes I'm ahead, ears floating back and tongue hanging out like a
+little flag--the angular shadow of the horse on the road in front. If I
+follow her, a fragrant dust blows back at me. It smells of warm leather,
+moist beast, and a little of her own perfume too. The road runs under
+me, like a ribbon that someone is pulling. Oh, what joy it is to be so
+little and so swift, running along in the shadow of a great galloping
+horse! When we halt, I pant like a motor, between the legs of my friend,
+who snorts and in the kindliest way puts down his fettered mouth and
+sprinkles me ...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I know, I know! The horse "with long mane ashake; hoofs, heavy with
+tumult; eyes, glimmering white." ...You are the last of the
+Romanticists.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'm not the last of the Romanticists. I'm a little bull-dog that came
+into the world one evening, almost under the feet of a chestnut mare.
+She didn't lie down all night long, she was so afraid of crushing my
+mother and her puppies. A little bull-dog like me is almost the child of
+a horse. I lay in the warm straw against her warm flanks, I drank out of
+the stable pails. I used to get up when I heard the sound of hoofs
+coming in and I took an interest in the washing of the carriages, until
+the day She came and picked me out--_me_, the best-looking, the most
+snub-nosed, the stockiest of the litter. (_Sighing_.) And there She
+lies, so dreadfully quiet! It makes me sad to see her with that little
+cloth still 'round her ankle. You remember when He picked her up in his
+arms? He held her--and She's a lot bigger than I am--just as if She were
+a little dog that he was going to drown....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_bitterly_)
+
+I remember. I was at the top of the stairs irritated by the noise, but
+curious. He came up and pushed me aside with his foot, as he would have
+done if a piece of furniture had happened to be in his way.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Is that why you stayed away from this room--her room--for three whole
+days?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_hesitating_)
+
+Yes ... and for another reason too.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What reason?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Because of the fever.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_carried away by his love_)
+
+Her fever smells better than other peoples' good health!
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_shrugging his shoulders_)
+
+And they talk of a dog's scent! Truly the convictions of Two-Paws are
+based upon childish fables. You know of course that fever--
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_in a low tone_)
+
+Makes one afraid, yes.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_in a low tone_)
+
+Makes one afraid, gives one cold shivers down one's back, distaste for
+everything and uneasiness all over. One hesitates on the threshold of a
+room where there is fever, searching fearfully some hidden thing.... She
+was in bed and burning hot. I looked at her a long time, ready to run,
+saying to myself: "Who can be with her there--behind the curtains--who
+is it stifles and torments her and makes her moan in her sleep?"
+TOBY-DOG, (_frightened retrospectively_)
+
+There wasn't anyone, was there?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No one but He--and the fever. He, the most intelligent of Two-Paws, was
+leaning over her listening to her breathing, dimly aware of an invisible
+presence. I overcame my aversion and looked at her. I was melancholy and
+jealous. He must love her, thought I, to go so near and defend her, to
+kiss her, imbued as She is with the evil charm. Would He hold me to his
+heart, if I--
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_imperatively_)
+
+'Sh!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+What?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+She stirred.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_alert, looking at her_)
+
+No ... She didn't stir, but her thoughts did. I felt them. Continue.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_who has recovered his equanimity_)
+
+I don't know now what we were talking about.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+The fev--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_quickly_)
+
+Enough. Don't recall it. Fever is the beginning of the thing one never
+speaks of.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_shivering_)
+
+Yes, I know.... I don't like an animal that can't move. You know what I
+mean ...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_laughing cruelly_)
+
+Nor do I. I can only eat live birds, and as for the tiny mice, I prefer
+to swallow them, squeak and all....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Why does it amuse you to horrify me? You've a certain vanity that I
+can't understand. It consists in exaggerating cruelties that are already
+real enough. You call me the last of the Romanticists, aren't you the
+first of the Sadics?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Oh dog, poisoned with literature! An eternal misunderstanding separates
+us. "I'm a little bull-dog," you replied just now, with that stupid
+sincerity which disarms me. Let me say to you in my turn, "I am a Cat."
+The name is sufficient dispensation. There is in me a hatred of pain and
+ugliness, an overmastering detestation of all that offends my sight, or
+my reason. When the concierge's cat dragged around his wounded paw, I
+threw myself upon him, fired by a righteous anger, and until he stopped
+his whining I--
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_supplicatingly_)
+
+Don't tell me!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_getting angry_)  Understand then, once and for
+all--if the pale recital of what I did upsets you--that I wished to
+abolish, to annihilate in that bleeding animal the suggestion of my own
+inevitable death ...
+
+(_They are quiet for a little while_.)
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_shuddering_)
+
+This confinement does us no good. I would gladly go out into the soft
+sunshine and do "the bayadeer's dance," as He calls it, on the dry
+gravel among the leaves, which look like fried potatoes. Everything is
+yellow out-of-doors. My green eyes would reflect the golden sun and the
+flaming woods and so turn yellow too.... Now I'll think only of what is
+joyous and yellow, the beautiful, cold Autumn, the rosy dawn that leaves
+its colors in the foliage of the cherry-tree ... Come, let's prove the
+strength of our legs and enjoy to the full the consciousness that youth
+has only just begun for us ... Who knows, death may never come ...
+
+(_He jumps down from the console-table, without making the least
+noise_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_stopping him_)
+
+What are you going to do?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Scratch at the door, and strike up the "Hymn of the Sequestered Cat."
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_indicating the figure on the couch_)
+
+And doubtless waken Her?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_stubbornly_)
+
+I'll sing in a very small voice.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+And you'll scratch with your tiniest claws, I suppose? Stay here
+quietly, He commanded it when He went away.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_loftily_)
+
+Does He command me? He beseeches me, and that's my only reason for
+obeying him.
+
+(_He sits down again, apparently resigned, and yawns slowly_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_yawning_)
+
+You make me yawn.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+On the contrary, it's you who bore me. (_Temptingly_.) You're thinking
+what a good thing freedom is, aren't you?... A hen has probably escaped
+from the chicken yard--what sport you're missing!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+You really think so?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I said: probably.... Have you finished exploring that rabbit's hole?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_disturbed_)
+
+No ... it's so very deep! I almost buried myself, hollowing it out
+yesterday. The earth that stuck to my muzzle had some of the animal's
+fur in it....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_more and more satanic_)
+
+I suppose you'll finish that to-morrow ... or some other day. TOBY-DOG,
+(_sadly_)
+
+Why not say next year, while you're about it?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+What's the matter with you? Your shiny black lip hangs down an ell, and
+your froggy eyes glitter with tears. Are you crying?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_sniffling_)
+
+No ...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Poor, sensitive heart, console yourself. You'll have your pleasures and
+your friends again. At this very moment the farmer's dog is crunching
+bones in the kitchen ... to beguile the long wait for you.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_overcome_)
+
+Oh! oh! the farmer's dog!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+She's not alone either; that great dane, the watch-dog, keeps her
+company.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_rebellious_)
+
+That's not true!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Go see.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_after one bound toward the door_)  No, that would make
+noise.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+You're right, it would.
+
+(_A mournful silence follows_. TOBY _curls himself up like a turban and
+closes his eyes, because he feels like crying. His breath comes in
+little sobs_.)
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_absently, in a low, monotonous chant_.)
+
+The dog ... the little dog ... the bones, the little dog ... the rabbit
+... the great dane, the rabbit's hole ...the little dog, the mutton
+bones ...the rabbit's skin ...
+
+TOBY-DOG, _at first endures the torture heroically; then his nerves
+betray him and lifting his head he howls--the long plaint of the
+abandoned dog_.
+
+Wooo--oo--oooooo!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_from the top of the console-table_)
+
+Will you be quiet!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Wooooooooo!!--oo--oooo--oo!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_aside_)
+
+That's it! That's it!
+
+(SHE _wakes bewildered, still captive of her dreams, while the Cat
+listens patiently to the approaching step on the stairs, which means
+liberty for him and punishment for_ TOBY-DOG.)
+
+
+
+THE FIRST FIRE
+
+
+_Because it is raining and an October wind chases wet leaves through the
+air, She has lit the first fire of the season in the great
+chimney-place_. KIKI-THE-DEMURE _and_ TOBY-DOG, _in ecstasy, side by
+side on a corner of the warm hearth-stone, contemplate the flame with
+dazzled eyes and address their meditations to it_.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_looking very like a cushion; no paws visible_)
+
+Oh Fire, how splendid you are! You have come back more beautiful than my
+memory of you! You are hotter and nearer than the sun! The pupils of my
+eyes contract in your light, their lids half close, modestly hiding the
+joy I feel at seeing you again, and my inscrutable countenance shows but
+the semblance of a thought painted there in fawn color and black....
+Your crackling drowns the soft sound of my purr. Don't snap too much. Be
+merciful, O inconstant Fire! Don't sputter sparks on my fur. Allow me to
+adore you without fear ...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_half baked; eyes blood-shot; tongue pendant_)
+
+Fire! Divine Fire! Here you are again! I am still very young, but I
+remember how awe-struck I was the first time Her hand woke you in this
+same chimney-place. The sight of a god as mysterious as you are was most
+impressive to a baby-dog just out of the maternal stable. Oh Fire, I've
+not quite gotten over my fear! Hiii!... You spit at me, something red
+that smarts ... I'm afraid ... Well, it's gone now. How beautiful you
+are, Fire! Out from your ruddy center shoot tatters and shreds of gold,
+sudden spurts of blue, and smoke that twists upwards and draws queer
+shapes of beasts ... Oh, but I'm hot! Gently, gently, sovereign Fire,
+see how my truffle of a nose is drying up and cracking, and my ears--are
+they not ablaze? I adjure thee with suppliant paw. I groan ... ah ... I
+can endure it no longer!... (_He turns away_.) Nothing is ever perfect.
+The east wind coming under the door nips my hind-legs. Well, it can't be
+helped! I'll freeze behind if I must, provided I can adore you face to
+face.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I am a Cat and therefore aware of all that you bring in your train, O
+Fire! I foresee winter; its coming both troubles and pleases me. I've
+already begun to thicken and embellish my fur-coat in its honor, the
+darker stripes are becoming black, my white tippet swells into a
+dazzling boa, and the fur on my belly surpasses in beauty anything that
+has ever been seen. What shall I say of my tail, broad as a club, with
+alternate rings of fawn-color and black, or of the sensitive, priceless
+aigrettes which spring from my ears? My ear-rings She calls them....
+What cat could resist me! Ah! the January nights, the serenades under a
+frosty moon, the dignified wait on the pinnacle of a roof, the encounter
+with a rival cat on the narrow top of a wall!... But I feel quite sure
+of my superior strength. I'll swish my tail, put back my ears, sniff
+tragically as one does before vomiting, and then lift up my voice--its
+modulations are infinite. I'll make it strong enough to waken all the
+sleeping Two-Paws. I'll vociferate, I'll whimper, pacing up and down the
+garden, my body distended, my legs bent outward, feigning madness to
+terrify the tom-cats!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I know something of the changes and pleasures you foretell, Fire--for
+I'm a Dog. Already, it is raining in the garden. I suppose it's raining
+on the road too, and in the woods. The falling drops are not warm, as
+they were in the summer storms when my truffle, gray with dust,
+delighted in the damp smell that came from the west. The sky is troubled
+and the wind has grown strong enough to blow my ears out straight, like
+little flags. A sharp cry, such as I make when I beg, comes under the
+door. You'll be shining here every day, Fire; but I'll have to suffer
+for the right to worship you. For She'll continue to wander about, her
+head covered with the pointed hood which changes her so, that it
+frightens me. She'll put on wooden shoes too, and carelessly crush the
+puddles, the little heaps of mud, and the weeping mosses. I'll follow
+her, since I've promised to do so my life long (and also because I
+can't help it), I'll follow her, a forlorn and piteous object, shining
+wet, my belly covered with mud, until, through very excess of misery
+I'll forget, and ramble in the coppice, interested in every undulation
+of the grass, eager to revive the drowned scents in it.... She'll become
+communicative when she sees me hurrying along and we'll talk: "Ha,
+Toby-Dog," she'll say, "ha! ha! a bird! There on the branch! Look! you
+booby! Now he's gone." She'll condole with me then, until I'm on the
+verge of tears. "Oh, my little black boy, my sympathetic cylinder, my
+batrachian love, how cold you are, how wet, how sad, how you suffer,
+oooo!" And before I'm able to judge of the sincerity of her pity, the
+tears will overflow, my throat contract, and we'll wail in unison....
+
+Ah, but what delirious joy when the capricious wooden shoes turn again
+toward the house, hurrying to rejoin Him whom we've left scratching
+paper! They don't go half fast enough for me then! I jump 'round her,
+barking with delight to see the hill diminishing, our climb at an end,
+to smell the good stable smell and that of burning wood as we near the
+house. At last you shine forth, O Fire, O Sun, through the misty window
+pane!... I shall hardly have crossed the threshold when an overpowering
+sleepiness will dash me to the floor in front of you--you, who will
+reduce the mud on my belly to fine powder and change the water of the
+roads to smoky vapor.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE  A delightful glow penetrates my coat to the silky
+down, the impalpable colorless threads which protect my delicate skin. I
+feel myself swelling like a cloud. I must quite fill the room. My
+whiskers seem charged with electricity--a sign that I will sleep--but
+for the time being, the contemplation of your splendor and thoughts of
+the coming season keep me awake. It's raining. I shall not go out. I'll
+wait for the sun, or the dry wind, or better still, the frost. Ah, how
+the biting cold stimulates me! It lashes my lungs with handfuls of
+needles, and makes a _bonbon glacé_ of my charming nose. The rollicking
+frost-sprite will blow his madness into me. She'll laugh and He too,
+leaving his scratching-paper, to see me vie with the leaves in bounds,
+leaps and wild whirlings, resembling a floating flurry of gray smoke
+rather than a Cat. To the top of a tree! Down again! Then seven turns
+after my tail! A perilous backward leap! A vertical jump, with aerial
+_danse du ventre_! Girations, sneezes, careering from the real to the
+dream, until in terror of myself, I come to a sudden stop.... Everything
+turns before my eyes. I'm the center of a strange, spinning world ... In
+my bewilderment (half-feigned) I'll make a little moo, like a cow, which
+will bring them both running to me,--She laughing, and He fearing
+something wrong. That will suffice to sober me, and with a bold front
+and noble mien, I'll regain this cushion near your altar, O Fire!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+This hearth-stone burns the horny pads of my feet. What shall I do?
+Move away? never! I'll toast to death rather than give up this
+redoubtable bliss. Heaven prevent Her coming, now! I've reason to fear
+the lash of the whip, and the magic words which mean exile: "Toby!
+that's stupid! I forbid you to roast yourself. You'll have sore eyes,
+and catch cold when you go out." That's what She says, while I regard
+her with a stupid look of utter devotion. But She's never duped by it. I
+hear noises upstairs, her step coming and going ... I wonder is her
+vagabond fancy wearied at last? This morning She whistled to me and in
+my haste to obey her, I rolled to the bottom of the stairs--being low
+and thick-set, with short legs, no nose, and almost no tail to balance
+me. Well, we set off. The last apples were rocking to-and-fro on swaying
+branches. My happy voice, a joyful shout from her now and then, the vain
+crowing of the cocks, the creaking of wagons on the road--all these
+sounds floated on a bluish, cottony, suffocating fog. She took me far,
+and many marvelous things happened on our way. We met terrible giant
+dogs. My proud bearing seemed to exasperate them, but I kept them back
+with a single look (besides, a closed iron gate rendered them
+powerless). I chased a rabbit into the thicket, though She cried loudly:
+"I forbid you to touch the little animal!" ... My mother certainly gave
+me swift legs but they're short, and the white end of the little beast
+kept far ahead. A bush covered with red berries detained us a very long
+time. She sees no objection to eating strange things and I can
+truthfully say that I always taste everything She offers me, for I've
+great faith in her. But this morning--"Eat, Toby, nice berries. Eat!
+here are some rose-hips. Oh stupid! how can you not dote upon their
+delicious flavor? I assure you these are comfits of Mother Nature's
+making." In deference to her, I chewed a reddish ball; there were some
+rough hairs on it--put there doubtless by her teasing hand--and what was
+bound to happen, did happen ... Khaha! My throat rejected the nasty
+"rosehip." ...
+
+But listen, Fire, what I saw after that, passes _my_ understanding. It
+was in a wood where stiff leaves rustled. Had She carried you under her
+cloak, or do gods like you come at her bidding? I saw her hands pile up
+the wood, arrange flat stones in some mysterious fashion, and then,
+Fire, I saw the sparks flash and your joyous soul palpitate, grow big,
+soar naked and rose-colored, veil itself in smoke, snap noisily (for
+yours is a belligerent soul), agonize--and disappear.... The world is
+full of incomprehensible things.... Last of all, on our way back, I
+discovered near the park gate--saw it before She did--one of those
+invincible beasts called hedge-hogs, the mere sight of which brings us
+dogs to bay. What madness to realize that an animal is hiding under that
+pin-cushion and laughing at me, and that I can do nothing, _nothing_! I
+implored her--She can do nearly everything--to pluck him for me. She
+began by turning him over with a little stick, as if he were a horse
+chestnut. "Astonishing," said She, "I can't find the top of him!" Then
+She took one of his spines between two fingers and carried him home that
+way--I dancing behind her--and put him in her work basket. After a while
+the horrid beast unrolled himself, stuck out a pig-like nose, opened two
+shiny rat's eyes and raised himself, holding fast by his little paws,
+which were exactly like a mole's. "How pretty he is," She cried, "a real
+little black pig." I stood near the table groaning with covetousness,
+but She didn't pluck him for me, not then, or ever, and perhaps the cook
+ate him.... This cat's a dissembler. Maybe _he_ ... But away with care!
+I'm too excitable! I mustn't let myself think of these things. Life is
+beautiful, O Fire, since you illumine it ... I'm going to sleep ...
+Watch over my unconscious body ... I'm going ... to sleep....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+One would think me asleep because the narrow slit made by my parted
+eyelids, seems but the continuation of that velvety line, that bold
+crayon-stroke, a sort of Oriental make-up, uniting my eyelids and my
+ears. But I'm awake, keeping watch like a yogi, in a state of blissful
+ankylosis, conscious of all that's going on around me.... My privileged
+eyes, Fire, do but behold you better when they're closed and I can count
+the various essences you mingle in a sparkling bouquet. Here in a flame
+of mauve-color and blue, glows the soul of a branch of arbor-vitae.
+Yesterday it waved a plume-like shadow on the garden walk ... To-day,
+with its delicate twigs, it is but a writhing skeleton. She cut it with
+one stroke of the pruning scissors. Why? That it might breathe out its
+fervent blue and mauve-colored soul? For like me, She delights in your
+dance, Fire, and chastises you when you're quiet, with a stern pair of
+tongs. Sitting there with her head bent and her arms hanging along her
+sides, what does She read, I wonder, in that fiery rose which is the
+labyrinthian heart of you?... She knows a great deal certainly, but not
+as much as a Cat.
+
+That thick tear on the log represents the anguish of a very old
+fir-tree, killed by the assiduous ivy. Just a short time ago I saw it
+struck down, lying on the grass, its foliage looking like a beautiful
+head of reddish hair. I saw the axe that felled it, too. Its trunk weeps
+tears of resin, which trail along in drivel, then change to heavy,
+creeping flame. But the dry red locks break into lines of living fire,
+whistle and shoot innumerable jets of many colors underneath a broad
+gold wave that rolls voluptuously....
+
+Ah, love ... hunting ... fighting.... It's your light, Fire, that
+discovers these passions in the depths of my being. It's time the little
+winged creatures searching withered berries came near. I'll have them
+soon! I'll watch, motionless in the brushwood, wildly wishing that the
+earth itself might hide me, the muscles of my legs twitching with desire
+to make the spring, my chin trembling.... Then, if I don't betray my
+hiding-place by an irrepressible quavering, frightening them away in one
+great commotion of wings and rustling branches!... But no, I'm master of
+myself. One bound at exactly the right moment and my feeble prey is
+panting under me. Oh, the ridiculous effort of a weak animal--its tiny
+ineffectual claws and pointed wings beating against my face! My jaws
+will open to the splitting point and my perfect nose wrinkle
+ferociously, for the joy of holding a living, terrified body. I'll know
+the intoxication of battle! I'll prance victoriously, shaking my head to
+torment the bird a little, for it faints away too soon between my teeth!
+Terrible to see I'll gallop towards the house, singing in a strangled
+voice, without loosening my grip, for He must stop his scratching to
+admire me, and She must give chase with distracted cries: "Wicked,
+savage cat! Drop that bird! drop that bird!! Oh, I beg of you! It hurts
+me so...." Ha! She never can have hunted....
+
+I intend to astonish the world, Fire, during Winter's reign. The Cat
+that lives at the farm (She says the farmer's cat, while we say the
+Cat's farmer), the fellow that's so badly dressed, disfigured by the
+nose of a weasel, and seems to walk on stilts, his legs are so
+long--well, he sharpens his claws and regards me the while. Patience!
+He's strong, brutal, irresolute, and utterly lacks distinction. The
+slamming of a door terrifies him; he puts back his ears and flies,
+panic-stricken. Still, I've seen him kill a good-sized hen, without
+making any fuss about it. For a glance of the young cat's deceitful
+eyes, or right of precedence on the garden wall, for a word of double
+meaning, for nothing, but the fun of the thing--I'll take my chances
+with him! He'll learn that a mysterious silence can demoralize the enemy
+quite as effectively as murderous cries. The low garden wall seems to me
+a convenient place. Let him try his hoarse miauling in all possible
+keys! May his unsightly face, and more hideous body dislocate itself in
+a deceitful ataxia (for they're still at these old tricks)! I'll be
+proof against it all, and merely flash the green magnetism of my
+magnificent eyes upon him. His brows will fall under their persistent
+insult, a shudder will run along his spine, he'll do a few steps of our
+ancient war dance--forward, back, forward again. But I'll
+stand--motionless as the statue of a Cat. The green witchcraft of my
+gaze will strike terror and madness into my rival and soon I'll see him
+writhe, utter false cries, and, as a last resource, try to balance
+himself on the nape of his neck, like a forked pear tree, only to roll
+over shamefully into the potato field....
+
+All that will come to pass, Fire, exactly as I've told it. To-day the
+future dawns in your new flame.... I'm growing drowsy.... My purr and
+your crackling are ceasing together.... I see you still and already I
+catch glimpses of my dreams.... The silky sound of the rain against the
+window is soft as a caress, and the water-pipe on the roof sobs low like
+a pigeon....
+
+Don't go out during my nap, Fire. Remember, you're the guardian of my
+august repose--that delicate death, known as a Cat's sleep....
+
+
+
+THE STORM
+
+
+_A suffocating summer's day in the country. The blinds of the house are
+half closed. Not a sound is heard from within; not a murmur from the
+parched garden, where even the sensitive leaves of the mimosa hang
+motionless_.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE _and_ TOBY-DOG _begin to feel uncomfortably conscious of
+the coming storm, which is yet but a slate-blue plinth thickly painted
+at the bottom of the dull blue sky-wall._
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_restlessly lying first on one side, then on the other_) No
+use! I can't be comfortable. What does this heat mean anyway? I must be
+sick. It began at breakfast; I didn't like the meat and sniffed
+disdainfully at my dog-biscuit. Something awful is going to happen. I
+haven't done anything wrong that I know of--my conscience is clear--and
+yet, I'm suffering. There lies my chum, shivering and unable to sleep. I
+know by his quick breathing that he feels just as I do.... I say, Cat?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_irritably, in a low tone_)
+
+Be quiet!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What? You're listening to some noise?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No! _Heavens_, no! Don't mention noise. The mere sound of your voice
+makes the skin on my back go in waves like the sea. TOBY-DOG,
+(_frightened_)
+
+Are you going to die?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I hope not. I've a sick headache. Can't you see the arteries throbbing
+under the almost hairless skin of my temples--the transparent, bluish
+skin that denotes a thoroughbred? It's atrocious! The veins on my
+forehead are like writhing vipers, and I don't know _what_ gnome forges
+in my brain! Oh, be quiet! Or at least speak so low that the coursing
+of my agitated blood may drown the sound of your voice....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+But it's this very silence that oppresses me. I tremble and don't know
+why. I long for the familiar voice of the wind in the chimney, the
+slamming of doors, the whispering of the garden, the poplars' ceaseless
+rustle--it always sounds like a trickling spring--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+The uproar will come, soon enough.
+
+TOBY-DOG  Do you think so? I wish He'd scratch paper. It's an idle
+habit but an honored one. And see how listless She is, there in her
+wicker chair. Their silence frightens me more than anything. She seems
+asleep, but I can see her eyelashes move and the tips of her fingers,
+too. She's forgetting to play with the little balls of thread and
+doesn't sing, or whistle. She suffers just as we do.... Do you think
+this can be the end of the world, Cat?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No. It's a storm. Heavens! how uncomfortable I am! If I could only get
+out of my skin, cast off this fleece which is smothering me, fling
+myself naked as a skinned mouse into a fresher atmosphere! Oh Dog, you
+cannot see the sparks that make every separate hair on my body crackle,
+but I feel them. Don't come near! A blue flame is going to shoot out of
+me....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_shuddering_)
+
+Things are coming to an awful pass! (_He drags himself to the porch_.)
+_What_ have they done to the out-of-doors? Look! the trees are all blue
+and the grass glistens like a sheet of water. What mournful sunlight! It
+shines white on the slate roofs, and the little houses over there on the
+hill look like brand new tombstones. A heavy odor, like bitter almond,
+creeps from the white bell-shaped blossoms of the daturas, and makes me
+feel sick and faint. Far away, some smoke, heavy as the perfume of the
+daturas, goes slowly up in a straight line and falls again--like a
+broken aigrette.... But come and see for yourself!
+
+(KIKI-THE-DEMURE _walks falteringly to the porch_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+My word, _you're_ changed too, Cat! You look as if you were starving,
+your face is so drawn. Your fur is plastered down in some places and
+sticking up in others; gives you the expression of a weasel that had
+tumbled into oil.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Don't let that worry you! I'll regain my dignity--if ever another day
+dawns for us. To-day, I drag myself around unwashed, uncombed, like a
+woman out of love with love, and life....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+You say such distressing things. I think I'll whine and call for help.
+Perhaps I'd better go to Her, and look in her face for the comfort you
+refuse me. But She seems asleep now, in that wicker chair, and how can I
+read my fate in her eyes, when their lids are down. I'll lick her hand
+very respectfully and ever so lightly! That will wake her and oh, may
+her first caress drive away the evil charm!
+
+(_He licks the hand hanging at the side of the chair_.)
+
+SHE, (_with a scream_)  Heavens! how you frightened me! Was there ever
+such a ninny as this Dog? There!...
+
+(SHE _administers a smart rap on the nose_. TOBY'S _nerves give way and
+he howls loud and long_.)
+
+SHE
+
+Quiet! Not a word I say! Out of my sight! I don't know what's the
+matter, but I hate you! And that Cat sitting there, looking at me, like
+a bump on a log!...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_bristling_)
+
+If She dares to touch me, I'll devour her!
+
+(_Just at this dangerous crisis a low rumbling is heard, distant and
+then near. Impossible to tell whether it comes from the horizon, or
+arises in the house itself. All three lose interest in the quarrel_.
+
+TOBY-DOG _and_ KIKI-THE-DEMURE _slink away, as if responding to a
+signal, and seek shelter, one under the bookcase and the other under an
+armchair_. SHE _turns anxiously to the leaden-hued garden, and the great
+violet bank of cloud, which of a sudden is riven by a blinding streak of
+blue fire_.)
+
+SHE, TOBY-DOG, KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_all together_)
+
+Oh!
+
+(_A sudden crash shakes the windows, and instantly a great rush of wind
+envelopes the house, with a noise as of flapping canvas:--all the garden
+prostrates itself_.)
+
+SHE, (_in anguish_)
+
+Heavens! the apples!
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_invisible_)
+
+I'll let them cut my ears into strips rather than leave this
+hiding-place!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_invisible_)
+
+I can't help hearing, and it's as if I saw everything that's going on.
+She hastens to close the windows. Someone is running on the stairs. Aïe!
+Another awful flame--and everything is falling in! Silence now.... I
+wonder are they all dead? I'll look through the fringes of the chair,
+though it's risking my life to do so. Ah, hailstones making holes in
+the leaves! Here comes the rain, in silvery drops, wide apart, and so
+heavy that the gravel wrinkles up when they fall.
+
+SHE, (_heart-broken_)
+
+I can hear the peaches falling, and the green nuts too!
+
+(_All three are silent. Rain; quivering streaks of lightning; hissing in
+the pine-trees. The wind howls. A lull_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'm not quite so afraid as I was. The sound of the rain relaxes my tired
+nerves. I seem to feel its streaming warmth on my ears and the back of
+my neck. Now the hubbub is further off! I can hear myself breathe. The
+light coming under this bookcase, is brighter than it was. What is She
+doing? I daren't go out yet. If only the Cat would move! (_He sticks
+out his head, like a wary turtle. A flash of lightning makes him draw it
+back again_.) Ha! It's beginning all over again. Rain by the bucketfuls
+against the window-panes. Something in the chimney is trying to imitate
+that far-away rumbling. Everything's falling to pieces ... and _She_
+gave me a rap on the nose!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Drop by drop, a little brownish river is filtering under the loose
+window-sash. It's stretching out and out on the floor, winding its way
+over to me. I'm so hot and thirsty, I'd like to lap up some of it. My
+joints ache and my ears are tired of standing up like weather-cocks at
+every crash. My jaws are still clenched with nervous fear. The seat of
+this chair is too low; it annoys me, rubbing against the fur on my back.
+However, it's some comfort to be able to _think_ of such things--thanks
+to the peace that's descended on the house. The rain is falling quietly
+and the wind has gone down, but the memory of the din still hums in my
+ears. What can He be doing? The storm distresses him too. Why didn't He
+come forward to calm the raging elements? There She is, opening the
+porch door. Isn't it too soon?... No, for the hens are cackling like old
+maids as they hop over the puddles. We're going to have fine weather.
+Oh, the adorable smell of wet leaves and earth refreshed! It's so new,
+so pure, I seem to breathe for the first time!
+
+(_He creeps stealthily to the porch_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_suddenly_)
+
+Um! How good! That smells like a walk! Things change so quickly one
+hasn't time to think. She's opened the door? Let's run! (_He dashes
+out_.) Well! well! the garden has got back its own color again! A
+warmish vapor moistens my rough-grained nose. I'm filled with the desire
+to jump and run. The grass is reeking, shining wet. Horned snails are
+feeling around in the pink gravel with the tips of their eyes, and
+speckled black and white slugs embroider the wall with a silver ribbon.
+Oh! what a beautiful green and gold beastie running out there in the
+wet! Shall I catch it? Shall I scratch its metallic shell, until it
+breaks with a little crackling sound? No. I'd rather stay near Her.
+She's leaning against the door, taking deep breaths and smiling quietly
+to herself. I'm _so_ happy! Something inside me feels grateful to the
+whole world. The light is beautiful, and I'm quite sure that there'll
+never, never be another storm.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I shan't wait any longer; I'm going out. I'll find dry places between
+the puddles for my dainty paws to step on. An imperceptible thrill runs
+through the streaming garden, making the jewels hung all about, tremble
+and sparkle.... The slanting rays of the setting sun find their
+reflection in my eyes which are spangled with green and gold. Down near
+the horizon, where the sky is still unsettled, a glittering sword leaps
+up and puts to flight the dark, fuming cloud-horses, that have been
+galloping over our heads. Now the odor of the daturas rises and perfumes
+all the air, mingled with that of lemon leaves, bruised by the hail.
+The roses are crowned with midges. Oh sudden springtime! An involuntary
+smile stretches the corners of my mouth. I'm going to play at tickling
+my nostrils with the point of a sweet-smelling blade of grass, carefully
+stretching my neck to avoid the falling drops. But I want Him to follow
+and admire me. Will He not come out and enjoy himself with us?
+
+(_A voice is heard humming the motif of the_ Regensbogen: _sol, si, re,
+sol, la, si,--all flats. A door opens and closes again_. HE _appears
+under the dripping foliage of vines and jasmine, framing the veranda,
+and at the same moment, a rainbow is seen in the sky_.)
+
+
+
+
+A CALLER
+
+
+(_A winter's afternoon, in Paris. The studio; a fire crackles gently in
+the tower-shaped stove_. TOBY-DOG _and_ KIKI-THE-DEMURE, _one on the
+floor, the other on his own particular cushion, proceed with the minute
+toilet which follows a long siesta. Peace reigns_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+My nails grow faster here than in the country.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+It's the contrary, with mine.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Really!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_bitterly_)
+
+Not to be wondered at! She clips them for the sake of the hangings ...
+Well! (_Magniloquently_), what can't be cured must be endured.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What are you going to do to-day?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Why ... nothing.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_ironically_)
+
+For a change I suppose.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE Pardon, to _avoid_ change. What is this rage for change
+that takes possession of you all? Change means destruction. Only that
+which remains stationary is eternal.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'm eternal then, these three hours past.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+But you've been out with Her, haven't you? You came in like a whirlwind;
+bells rang, clothes were shaken out, you were sneezing and laughing and
+aureoled with icy air.... The end of her nose felt so cold when She
+kissed me on the forehead. She always kisses me there, just over the
+dark stripes forming the classic M, which She assures me stands for
+miaou and for Minet, my name in French.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Yes ... we had a fine run on the banks of the fortifications, and then
+we went into a shop.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Is that amusing?
+
+TOBY-DOG  Not often. There are a great many people crowded together.
+I'm immediately seized with the fear of losing Her, and I stick close to
+her heels, no matter what comes. Strange feet push and knock me about
+and step on my paws. I yelp but the skirts all around stifle my
+voice.... When we're out of it, we both look as if we'd been
+shipwrecked....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+May the gods preserve _me_ from anything of the sort! Here, the moments
+have glided peacefully by. When She's not in this house, there's
+nothing to hinder me; I employ the time as my system of hygiene
+dictates. After my breakfast of rosy liver and milk, my kittenhood seems
+to come back to me; I'm filled with a foolish gayety. I go over to him.
+He's rumpling big, blackish papers and welcomes me with a quiet smile;
+we loll on the same divan, and revel in a few idle moments together.
+Sometimes, with imperious paw, I tear the paper He holds like a screen
+between us. It always seems to me the most desirable--the one that
+crackles best. He cries out, and I throw myself on my back and wriggle
+with joy in a sort of horizontal dance, He calls "the dance of the
+bayadeer." Then somehow, everything dwindles before my eyes, grows dim,
+and far away; I want to rise and go back to my cushion, but dreams
+already separate me from the world ... Ah! blessed hour when you and She
+disappear, when the house is at rest and takes a long breath. Soon I'm
+in the depths of a dark, sweet sleep; my ears alone keep watch and turn
+like sensitive antennas towards vague sounds of doors and bells ...
+
+(_At this moment someone rings_. TOBY-DOG _and_ KIKI-THE-DEMURE _start
+and change their positions. The Cat, sitting, encircles himself with his
+fluffy tail. The Dog, in a sphinx-like attitude, lifts his head
+boldly_.)
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+What's that?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+A tradesman?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_shrugging his shoulders_)
+
+That's not the kitchen bell. Perhaps it's caller.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_with a bound_)
+
+What luck! They'll have tea and cakes! Come on!! Sugar, sugar! Little
+cakes! Little cakes!!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_gloomily_)
+
+To see ladies who shriek, and put gloved hands on my back--hands covered
+with dead skin?... ugh!
+
+(_Feminine voices are heard--Hers among them--and the clear tinkling of
+a little bell; then the door opens and a very diminutive toy terrier
+enters, alone. She's black and tan, seems in love with herself, and
+comes forward with a mincing step_.)
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_voice way up in her head_)
+
+I'm the darling little dog, so pretty!
+
+(TOBY _is struck dumb with admiration and astonishment_. KIKI,
+_indignant, has jumped on top of the piano and remains an unseen and
+hostile spectator_.)
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_astonished at not hearing the chorus of admiration
+that everywhere greets her, is reciting_--)
+
+I'm the darling little dog, so pretty! I weigh only one pound, eleven
+ounces, my collar is of gold, my ears of black satin, lined with shiny
+rubber, my nails are polished like the beaks of little birds. (_Catching
+sight of_ TOBY-DOG.) Oh!--someone--(_silence_). He's rather
+good-looking.
+
+(_They ogle and strut_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+How tiny she is!
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Sir--don't come near me.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Why not?
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+I don't know. My mistress knows. She's not here. She stayed in the other
+room.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+How old are you?
+
+THE LITTLE DOG  Eleven months, (_reciting_) I'm eleven months old. At
+the dog show, my mother took first prize for beauty. I weigh only one
+pound eleven ounces and--
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+You've said that already. What makes you so little?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_from the piano_)
+
+She's ugly, and has an evil odor. Her paws are deformed, she can't stand
+still an instant, and this dog takes pains to make himself fascinating!
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_very coquettish and talkative_) It's my lineage, of
+course. One can hold me in a muff. You've seen my new collar? It's
+gold....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+And what's that hanging from it?
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+My mother's medal, Sir. I always wear it. I come from the _Palais de
+Glace_, where I made quite a hit. Imagine! I wanted to bite a gentleman
+who was speaking to my mistress. _How_ they laughed!
+
+(_She wriggles and chirps_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_aside_)
+
+What an odd creature! Is she _really_ a dog? (_Sniffs_.) Yes ... smells
+of rice powder, but it's a dog just the same. (_Aloud_.) Sit down a
+moment, it makes me quite dizzy to see you moving about so.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Certainly. (_She lies down, like a miniature greyhound, crossing her
+fore-paws to show the slimness of her toes_.) You were here all alone?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_looking toward the piano_)
+
+Yes, no other dog. Why?
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+There's a strange odor.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+The Cat, doubtless.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+The Cat? What's a Cat? I've never seen one. Do they leave you in the
+room all alone?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+It happens so now and then.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+And you don't bark? _I_ cry as soon as I'm left alone. I'm bored,
+afraid, feel sick, and chew up the cushions.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+And then you're whipped.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_insulted_)
+
+I'm--what did you say? You're losing your senses, I imagine. (_Suddenly
+amiable again_.) That would be a pity. You have lovely eyes.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Haven't I? They show well, don't they? They're large, and then they
+stick out. She says I have eyes like a lobster's, and sometimes She says
+"his beautiful seal's eyes, his frog-like eyes of gold."
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Who's She?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_simple_)
+
+She.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+I don't understand all you say, but I find you so _very_ sympathetic!
+What are you doing this evening?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Why ... I dine.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Naturally! I wanted to know whether they receive here this evening, or
+do _you_ go out?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+No, I've been out already.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Driving?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Walking--of course.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Why, of course? I hardly stir except in a carriage. Show me the
+underside of your paws. Horrors! One would say 'twas the stone they
+sharpen knives on! Look at mine. Satin on top, velvet underneath.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'd like to see you in the country, on the cobble-stones.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+I've been there, Sir. I was in the country last summer and there weren't
+any cobble-stones.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Then it wasn't the country. You don't know what country means.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_vexed_)
+
+Indeed I do, Sir! It's fine sand, and velvety lawns that are swept every
+morning; it's a reclining chair on the grass, great, fresh cushions of
+cretonne, foamy milk, naps in the shade, and charming little red apples
+to play with.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_shaking his head_)
+
+No. It's the road covered with white powder that makes the eyelids smart
+and the paws burn, the tough, shriveled, sweet-smelling grass, where I
+scratch my nose and my gums; it's the fearful night--for I'm the only
+one to guard them, He and She. I lie in my basket, but the beating of my
+poor overdriven heart keeps me awake. I hear a dog crying to me from far
+off, that the Bad Man has passed on the road. Is he coming in my
+direction? Will I be obliged in another minute, my eyes bloodshot and
+tongue dry as chalk, to throw myself upon him and devour his shadowy
+face?...
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_trembling and in ecstasy_)
+
+Go on! Go on! Oh! how frightened I am!...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_modestly_)  Don't be afraid--it has never happened. All
+that is the country, yes, and the interminable hill, in the shadow of
+the carriage, when thirst, hunger, heat and fatigue, render the soul
+submissive and hopeless ...
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_quite worked up_)
+
+And then?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh, nothing. One arrives at the house, after all, and the pail of dark
+water, one drinks without taking breath, ("his tongue," She says, "his
+big tongue is parted in the center, like an iris-petal") while sore
+eyelids and dusty lashes are splashed with cooling drops.... The country
+is all that and many things besides....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_on the piano, musingly_)
+
+All that, yes ...and the habits of the year before that one finds again,
+molded to one's shape, like a cushion marked with the imprint of a long
+sleep ...the long nights of freedom, when the lone owlet, with his sad
+little laugh, makes his way through the air as quietly as I do on the
+ground, and silvery gray rats cling to the vines, eating grapes and
+keeping their eyes on me at the same time. It's the sun-cure on the hot
+stone-wall, from which I arise wan and shrunken, baked through and
+through, but svelte enough to make the youngest tomcat envious. (_Coming
+back to the present with a murderous look at_ THE LITTLE DOG.) Death to
+you, ill-smelling beast, for having evoked these by-gone joys! Aren't
+you going to disappear, that I may come down from this cold pedestal,
+where my paws are growing numb?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_enthusiastically to_ THE LITTLE DOG)
+
+But let us forget all that! With you there, I can think of nothing but
+you. I feel that I love you!
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_lowering her eyes_)
+
+Do you mean ...really?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Of course I do!
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+So soon!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+We've already wasted a great deal of time.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+But ... we've been chatting. I've enjoyed it very much ... and I fail to
+understand why the society of young dogs like you, is forbidden me ...
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Allow me to make love to you.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+What's that?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'll show you. First I hold myself very erect, stiffen my legs, walk
+'round you, barking low and melodiously. My tail wriggles, my ears ...
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Don't come near me. I feel quite upset. (_Escaping_.) Aïe! You
+unmannerly fellow!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_standing up_)
+
+These preludes are indeed a sad parody on our wild love-making ...
+(_aloud, very angry_) I should think--
+
+THE LITTLE DOG _looks to see where the dreadful voice is coming from,
+and espies a strange striped monster with eyes afire, and eyebrows and
+whiskers bristling ferociously. She dashes towards the door crying_,
+
+Help, help! There's a tiger on the piano!...
+
+_And falls into the arms of her mistress, who has come upon the scene
+and proceeds to console her with great volubility; Fifi! my Zezette! My
+darling! there, there, goo, goo, goo, goo, you poor helpless little
+doggie! What did they do to her? Ooooo!--Ooo! Was it the naughty
+bow-bow? etc., etc., etc_.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Barks and Purrs
+by Colette Willy, aka Colette
+Translated by Maire Kelly
+
+*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK BARKS AND PURRS ***
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+  <head>
+    <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content=
+    "text/html; charset=iso-8859-1">
+    <title>
+      The Project Gutenberg eBook of Barks And Purrs, by Colette Willy.
+    </title>
+    <style type="text/css">
+    <!--
+    p {  margin-top: .75em;
+         text-align: justify;
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+    hr { width: 50%;
+	margin-top: 1em;
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+   body {margin-left: 10%;
+         margin-right: 10%;}
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+
+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Barks and Purrs
+by Colette Willy, aka Colette
+Translated by Maire Kelly
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Barks and Purrs
+
+Author: Colette Willy, aka Colette
+Translated by Maire Kelly
+
+Release Date: March 28, 2004 [EBook #11737]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK BARKS AND PURRS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Hilary Caws-Elwitt and PG Distributed Proofreaders
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+<!--
+NOTE: Many of the illustrations were cut off by the printer and/or the scanning process.
+All of them are included, but the ones that I personally judged to be unusable are commented out.
+If a better copy of the book is obtained at some point in the future, ideally the "invisible"
+illustrations can be used as a guideline on where to place the improved versions.
+
+Hilary Caws-Elwitt, 3/24/04.
+-->
+
+<h1>BARKS AND PURRS</h1>
+
+<h3>BY</h3>
+
+<h2>COLETTE WILLY</h2>
+
+<h3>TRANSLATED BY<br />
+MAIRE KELLY</h3>
+<br />
+
+<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/004a.gif" width="320" height="216" align="left" />
+<br clear="left" />
+
+
+<h2>CONTENTS</h2>
+
+<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/004b.gif" width="392" height="218" align="right" />
+<br clear="right" />
+
+
+<!-- Autogenerated TOC. Modify or delete as required. -->
+<a href="#PREFACE"><b>PREFACE</b></a><br />
+<a href="#SENTIMENTALITIES"><b>SENTIMENTALITIES</b></a><br />
+ <a href="#ON_THE_TRAIN"><b>ON THE TRAIN</b></a><br />
+ <a href="#DINNER_IS_LATE"><b>DINNER IS LATE</b></a><br />
+ <a href="#SHE_IS_ILL"><b>SHE IS ILL</b></a><br />
+ <a href="#THE_FIRST_FIRE"><b>THE FIRST FIRE</b></a><br />
+ <a href="#THE_STORM"><b>THE STORM</b></a><br />
+ <a href="#A_CALLER"><b>A CALLER</b></a><br />
+
+<!-- End Autogenerated TOC. -->
+
+
+
+<br />
+
+<a name="PREFACE"></a>
+<h2>PREFACE</h2>
+
+<p><i>Madame</i>:</p>
+
+<p><i>There are moments when one seems to
+come to life. One looks about and distinguishes
+a creature whose foot-print closely
+resembles the ace of spades. The thing
+says: bow-wow. It is a dog. One looks
+again. The ace of spades is now an ace of
+clubs. The thing says: pffffffff&mdash;and it
+is a cat.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>This is the history of the visible world
+and in particular, that of my god-children,
+Toby-Dog and Kiki-the-Demure. They are
+so natural&mdash;I use the word in the sense in
+which it is applicable to the savages of
+Oceania&mdash;that all their acts conspire to
+make of life, a very simple proposition.
+These are animals in the fullest sense of the
+word&mdash;animos&mdash;if I may employ the original
+orthography, capable of exclaiming
+with those of Faust</i>:</p>
+
+<p class="poetry">&quot;The fool knows it not!<br />
+He knows not the pot,<br />
+He knows not the kettle.&quot;</p>
+
+<hr style="width: 45%;" />
+
+<p><i>And as such, Madame, you have placed
+them exactly where they should be: their
+earthly Paradise is the apartment of
+Monsieur Willy. In your salon, the probable
+palm and rubber-plant give the impression
+of luxuriant Edenic flora, relatively
+speaking, and illustrate the transmogrification
+which is to allow M. Gaston Deschamps&mdash;critic
+of a</i> &quot;Temps&quot; <i>plus-que-pass&eacute;&mdash;to
+announce to the wilderness
+(where he speaks familiarly of Chateaubriand),
+and to the Coll&egrave;ge de France, how well
+he can admire and understand a true poet</i>.</p>
+
+<hr style="width: 45%;" />
+
+<p><i>For you are a true poet and I will declare
+it freely, not concerning myself more with
+the legends Parisians have the habit of weaving
+about every celebrity. They admire
+Gauguin and Verlaine, not so much for their
+originality, as for their eccentricities. And
+so it happens that certain persons, unacquainted
+with the nameless sentiment, the
+order and purity, the thousand interior virtues
+which guide you, persist in saying that
+you wear your hair short and that Willy is
+bald.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>Must I then&mdash;living at Orthez&mdash;tell</i>
+Tout-Paris <i>who you are, present you to all
+who know you&mdash;I who have never seen you</i>?</p>
+
+<hr style="width: 45%;" />
+
+<p><i>I will say then, that Madame Colette
+Willy never had short hair, that she
+does not wear masculine attire; that her cat
+does not accompany her when she goes to a
+concert, that her friend's dog does not drink
+from a tumbler. It is inexact to say that
+Mme. Colette Willy works in a squirrel's
+cage, or performs upon trapeze and flying
+rings, and can reach with her toe the
+nape of her neck. Madame Colette Willy
+has never ceased to be the</i> plain woman <i>par
+excellence, who rises at dawn to give oats to
+the horse, maize to the chickens, cabbage to
+the rabbits, groundsel to the canaries, snails
+to the ducks and bran-water to the pigs. At
+eight o'clock, summer and winter, she prepares
+the caf&eacute; au lait for her maid&mdash;and
+herself. Scarcely a day passes that she
+does not meditate upon this admirable book</i>:</p>
+
+<table border="1" cellpadding="5" align="center" summary="">
+<tr><td align="center">
+<p class="center"><b>A LADY'S COUNTRY-HOUSE</b></p>
+
+<p class="center"><b>BY</b></p>
+
+<p class="center"><b>MME. MILLET ROBINET.</b></p>
+</td></tr></table>
+
+<p><i>Orchard, kitchen-garden, stable, poultry-yard,
+bee-hive and hot-house, have no further
+mysteries for Madame Colette Willy. They
+say, she refused to divulge her secret for the
+destruction of mole-crickets to &quot;a great
+statesman, who prayed her on his knees.&quot;</i></p>
+
+<hr style="width: 45%;" />
+
+<p><i>Madame Colette Willy is in no way different
+from the description I have just given
+of her. I am aware that certain folk, having
+met her in society, insist upon making her
+very complex. A little more, and they would
+have ascribed to her the tastes of the mustiest
+symbolists&mdash;and one knows how far
+from pleasing are those Muses' robes,
+how odious the yellow bandeaux above faces
+expressionless as eggs. Robes and bandeaux
+are to-day relegated to drawers in
+the Capitol at Toulouse, from which they
+will never be taken more, except when occasion
+calls for the howling of official alexandrines
+in honor of M. Gaston Deschamps,
+Jaur&egrave;s, or Vercing&eacute;torix.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>Madame Colette Willy rises to-day on
+the world of Letters as the poetess&mdash;at
+last!--who, with the tip of her slipper
+sends all the painted, laureled, cothurn&egrave;d,
+lyre-carrying Muses&mdash;that, from Monselet
+to Renan, have roused the aspirations of
+classes in Rhetoric&mdash;rolling, from the top
+to the bottom of Parnassus.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>How charming she is thus&mdash;presenting
+her bull-dog and her cat with as much assurance
+as Diana would her hound, or a
+Bacchante her tiger.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>See her apple-cheeks, her eyes like blue
+myosotis, her lips&mdash;poppy-petals, and her
+ivy-like grace! Tell me if this way of leaning
+against the green barrier of her garden-close,
+or of lying under the murmurous
+arbor of mid-Summer, is not worth the
+starched manner, that old magistrate de
+Vigny&mdash;with his neckcloth wound three
+times around, and rigid in his trousers'
+straps&mdash;imposed upon his goddesses?
+Madame Colette Willy is a live woman, a
+real woman, who has dared to be natural
+and who resembles a little village bride far
+more than a perverse woman of letters</i>.</p>
+
+<hr style="width: 45%;" />
+
+<p><i>Read her book and you shall see how accurate
+are my assertions. It has pleased
+Madame Colette Willy to embody in a couple
+of delightful animals, the aroma of gardens,
+the freshness of the field, the heat of
+state-roads,&mdash;the passions of men....
+For through this girlish laughter ringing
+in the forest, I tell you, I hear the sobbing of
+a well-spring. One does not stoop to a
+poodle or tom-cat, without feeling the heart
+wrung with dumb anguish. One is sensible,
+in comparing ourselves to them, of all that
+separates and of all that unites us</i>.</p>
+
+<hr style="width: 45%;" />
+
+<p><i>A dog's eyes hold the sorrow of having,
+since the earliest days of creation,
+licked the whip of his incorrigible persecutor
+in vain. For nothing has mollified
+man&mdash;not the prey brought him by a
+famishing spaniel, nor the humble guilelessness
+of the shepherd-dog, guarding the peace
+of the shadowy flocks under the stars</i>.</p>
+
+<p><i>A tragic fear shines in the cat's eyes.
+&quot;What are you going to do to me now?&quot;
+it seems to ask, lying on a rubbish-heap, a
+prey to mange and hunger&mdash;and feverishly
+it waits the new torture that will shatter its
+nervous system</i>.</p>
+
+<p><i>But have no fear... Madame Colette
+Willy is very kind. She quickly dispels
+the hereditary dread of Toby-Dog and
+Kiki-the-Demure. She meliorates the race,
+so that dogs and cats will learn in the end
+that it is less dull to frequent a poet than an
+unhappy Coll&egrave;ge de France candidate&mdash;had
+this candidate proven more copiously still,
+that the author of &quot;M&eacute;moires d'Outre-Tombe&quot;
+had topsyturvily described the jawbone
+of the Crocodile</i>.</p>
+
+<hr style="width: 45%;" />
+
+<p><i>Toby-Dog and Kiki-the-Demure well
+know that their mistress is a lady who
+would do no harm&mdash;neither to a piece of
+sugar nor to a mouse; a lady who, for our
+delight, jumps a rope she has woven of
+flower-words which she never bruises, and
+with which she perfumes us; a lady who sings,
+with the voice of a clear French rivulet, that
+wistful tenderness which makes the hearts of
+animals beat so fast</i>.</p>
+
+<p class="poetry">FRANCIS JAMMES.</p>
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<a name="DRAMATIS_PERSONAE"></a>
+<h2>DRAMATIS PERSONAE</h2>
+<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/018a.gif" width="197" height="325" align="left" />
+<br clear="left" />
+
+
+<p class="indent"><font size="+1"><b>KIKI-THE-DEMURE</b>, A Maltese cat.<br />
+<b>TOBY-DOG</b>, A French bull-dog.<br />
+<b>HE</b>, }<br />
+<b>SHE</b>,} Master and Mistress (of minor importance).</font></p>
+
+<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/018b.gif" width="269" height="401" align="right" />
+<br clear="all" />
+
+
+<a name="SENTIMENTALITIES"></a>
+<h2>SENTIMENTALITIES</h2>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/022.gif" width="548" height="346" /></p>
+
+
+<br />
+
+<p><i>The sunny porch</i>. TOBY-DOG <i>and</i> KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+<i>sprawl on the hot stone-flags,
+taking their after luncheon nap.
+The silence of Sunday prevails, yet</i> TOBY-DOG
+<i>is not asleep: the flies and a heavy
+luncheon torment him. Hind-quarters
+flattened out frog-fashion, he drags himself
+on his belly up to</i> KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+<i>whose striped body is perfectly quiet</i>.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Are you asleep?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>purrs feebly</i>)</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/023.gif" width="516" height="142" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Are you even alive? You're so flat! You
+look like the empty skin of a cat.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>in faltering tones</i>)</p>
+
+<p>L-e-t&mdash;m-e&mdash;a-l-o-n-e....</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Not sick, are you?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>No.... Let me alone. I'm asleep. I'm
+not even conscious of my body. What torment
+to live with you! I've eaten, it's two
+o'clock, let's sleep.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I can't. Something's made a ball in my
+stomach. It means to go down I guess,
+but very slowly. And then,&mdash;these <i>flies</i>,
+these <i>flies</i>! The eyes start out of my head
+at the sight of one of them. I'm all jaws,
+bristling with terrible teeth (just hear them
+snap), yet the infernal things escape me.
+Oh! my ears! Oh! my poor, sensitive,
+brown belly! My feverish nose! There! ... you see? ... right on my nose!
+<i>What</i> shall I do? I squint all I can ...
+two of them now? ... No ... only one ... no, two! ... I toss them up like bits
+of sugar and it's the empty air I snap....
+I'm worn out. I detest the sun, and the flies,
+and everything! ...</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He wails</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>sitting up, his eyes pale
+from the light and sleepiness</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Well, you've succeeded in waking me.
+That's all you wanted, isn't it? My dreams
+are gone! These flies that you're pursuing
+&mdash;I hardly felt their little teasing feet
+through my thick fur. The merest touch,
+like a caress, now and then thrilled along
+the silky sloping hairs which clothe me....
+But then you never act with any discretion.
+Your vulgar gayety is a nuisance, and when
+sad you howl like a low comedian.</p>
+
+<!--<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/024.gif" width="222" height="287" />-->
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>bitterly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>If you woke up just to tell me <i>that</i>&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>correcting</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Of course you'll remember 'twas <i>you</i> woke
+me.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I was so uncomfortable, I wanted someone
+to help me, to give me a word of encouragement....</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p><i>I</i> don't know any digestive words.</p>
+
+<p>(<i>Pause</i>.)</p>
+
+<p>Fancy their giving <i>me</i> a bad character
+when ... Just examine your conscience a
+bit and compare us. Hunger and heat wear
+you out and drive you mad; cold makes your
+blood curdle....</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>vexed</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Mine is a sensitive nature.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>A demoniacal nature, you mean!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>No, I don't mean that. You&mdash;you're a
+monstrous egoist.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Perhaps.... You and the Two-Paws
+don't understand what you're pleased to call
+a cat's egoism.... Our instinct of self-preservation,
+our dignity, our modest reserve,
+our attitude of weary renunciation
+(which comes of the hopelessness of ever
+being understood by them), they dub, in
+haphazard fashion, egoism. You're not a
+very discriminating dog, but at least you're
+free from prejudice. Will <i>you</i> understand
+me better? A cat is a guest in the house,
+not a plaything. Truly these are strange
+times we're living in! The Two-Paws, He
+and She, have <i>they</i> alone the right to be
+sad or joyful, to lick plates, to scold, or to
+go about the house indulging their capricious
+humors? I too have <i>my</i> whims, <i>my</i> sorrows,
+<i>my</i> irregular appetite, <i>my</i> hours of reverie
+when I wish to be alone....</p>
+
+<!--<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/027.gif" width="277" height="237" />-->
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>attentive and conscientious</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I'm listening, but I can hardly follow
+what you say. It's so complicated&mdash;a bit
+over my head, you know. But you astonish
+me! Are they in the habit of hindering
+you in your changeful moods? You mew,
+and they open the door. You lie on the
+paper&mdash;the sacred paper He's scratching on&mdash;He
+moves away, marvelous condescension!--and
+leaves you his soiled page.
+You meander up and down his scratching
+table, obviously in quest of mischief, your
+nose wrinkled up, your tail giving quick
+little jerks back and forth like a pendulum.
+She watches you laughing, while He announces
+&quot;the promenade of devastation.&quot;
+How then, can you accuse Them&mdash;</p>
+
+<!--<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/028.gif" width="584" height="202" />-->
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>insincere</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I don't accuse Them. After all, psychological
+subtleties are not in your line.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Don't speak so fast. I need time to understand.
+It seems to me&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>slyly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Pray, don't hurry! Your digestion
+might suffer in consequence.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>unconscious of the irony</i>)</p>
+
+<p>You're right! I've some trouble in expressing
+myself to-day.&mdash;Well, here goes:
+it seems to me that of the two of us it's you
+they make the most of, and yet <i>you</i> do all
+the grumbling.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>A dog's logic, that! The more one gives
+the more I demand.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>That's wrong. It's indiscreet.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Not at all. I have a right to everything.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>To everything? And I?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I don't imagine you lack anything, do
+you?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Ah, I don't know. Sometimes in my very
+happiest moments, I feel like crying. My
+eyes grow dim, my heart seems to choke me.
+I would like to be sure, in such times of anguish,
+that everybody loves me; that there
+is nowhere in the world a sad dog behind a
+closed door, that no evil will ever come....</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>jeering</i>)</p>
+
+<p>And <i>then</i> what dreadful thing happens?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>You know very well! Inevitably, at that
+moment She appears, carrying a bottle with
+horrible yellow stuff floating in it&mdash;Castor
+Oil! Wilful and unfeeling, she holds me
+between her strong knees, opens my jaws&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Close them tighter!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>But I'm afraid of hurting her&mdash;and my
+tongue, horrified, tastes the slimy mawkish
+stuff. I choke and spit, my poor face is
+convulsed and the end of this torture is
+long in coming.... You've seen me afterwards
+dragging myself around, melancholy,
+my head hanging, listening to the unwholesome
+glouglou the oil makes in my stomach. ...</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/031.gif" width="525" height="164" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Once when I was little She tried to give
+<i>me</i> castor oil. I scratched and bit her so,
+she never tried again. Ha! She must have
+thought she held the devil between her knees.
+I squirmed, blew fire through my nostrils,
+multiplied my twenty claws by a hundred,
+my teeth by one thousand, and finally&mdash;disappeared
+as if by magic.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I wouldn't dare do that. You see, I
+love her. I love her enough to forgive her
+even the torture of the bath.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>interested</i>)</p>
+
+<p>You do? Tell me how it feels. It makes
+me shiver all over, just to see her putting
+you in the water.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/032.gif" width="223" height="210" align="right">
+<p>Alas.... Listen then, and pity me.
+Sometimes, when She's come out of her
+tub with nothing on her but her skin, her
+soft hairless skin that I lick respectfully,&mdash;She
+spills out more warm water,
+throws in a brown brick which smells of
+tar, and calls, &quot;Toby!&quot; That's enough!
+The soul quits my body; my legs shake under
+me. Something shines on the water&mdash;the
+picture of a window all twisted out of
+shape&mdash;it dances about and blinds me.
+She seizes me, poor swooning thing that I
+am, and plunges me in.... Ye Gods! From
+that time on I'm lost.... My one hope is in
+her. My eyes fasten themselves on hers,
+while a close warmth sticks to me like another
+skin on top of mine.... The brick's
+all foamy now ... I smell tar ... my
+eyes and nostrils smart ... there are
+storms in my ears. She grows excited,
+breathes loud and fast, laughs, and scrubs
+me light-heartedly. At last She rescues me,
+fishing me out by the nape of my neck, I paw
+the air, begging for life; then comes the
+rough towel and the warm coverlet where, exhausted,
+I relish my convalescence....</p>
+
+
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>deeply impressed</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Calm yourself.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Jove! The telling it alone! ... But&mdash;you
+old sly-boots&mdash;didn't I see her one day
+armed with a sponge standing over <i>you,</i>
+holding <i>you</i> down on the toilet table?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>quite embarrassed, lashing his tail</i>)</p>
+
+<p>An old story! The long, fluffy hairs
+on my legs (which give them the outline of
+a Zouave's) had somehow gotten dirty. She
+insisted upon washing me. I persuaded her
+that I suffered atrociously under the
+sponge....</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>What a fibber you are! Did She believe
+you?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>'Um ... at first. It was my own fault
+tho' when She didn't. Turned over on my
+back, I proffered the candid belly, the terrified
+and forgiving eyes of a lamb about to be
+sacrificed. I felt a slight coolness, nothing
+more. A fear that my sensibilities might be
+destroyed, took possession of me. My rhythmical
+wailings increased, then subsided, then
+went up again like the noise of the sea (you
+know the strength of my voice). I imitated
+the calf, the whipped child, the cat in the
+night, the wind under the door. Little by
+little I grew enraptured with my own song,
+so that long after She had finished soiling me
+with cold water I continued wailing, my eyes
+fixed on the ceiling. Then She laughed tactlessly
+and cried out, &quot;You're as untruthful
+as a woman!&quot;</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/034.gif" width="501" height="259" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>with conviction</i>)</p>
+
+<p>That <i>was</i> annoying.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I was angry with her the entire afternoon.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Oh, as to sulking, you do your share! <i>I</i>
+never can. I forget injuries.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>dryly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>You lick the hand that chastens you. Oh
+it's well known!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>gullible</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I lick the hand that&mdash;yes, that's it exactly.&mdash;An
+awfully pretty expression.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Not mine.... Dignity doesn't trouble
+<i>you</i> any! My word! I'm often ashamed
+for you. You love everybody. You take
+all sorts of rebuffs without even raising your
+back. You're as pleasant and as banal as
+a public garden.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Don't you believe it, you ill-bred cat!
+You think you know everything and you
+don't understand simple politeness. Frankly
+now, would you have me snarl at His or Her
+friends' heels,&mdash;well-dressed people who
+know my name (lots of people <i>I</i> don't know
+know my name) and good-naturedly pull
+my ears?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I hate new faces.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I don't love them either&mdash;whatever you
+say. I love&mdash;Her and Him.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>And I, Him&mdash;and Her.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Oh, I guessed <i>your</i> preference long ago.
+There's a sort of secret understanding between
+you two&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/037.gif" width="528" height="190" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>smiling mysteriously
+and abandoning himself to his reverie</i>)</p>
+
+<p>An understanding, yes&mdash;secret and profound.
+He rarely speaks but makes a
+noise like a mouse, scratching his paper.
+It's for Him I've treasured up my little
+heart, my precious cat's heart, and He,
+without words, has given me his. This exchange
+makes me happy and reserved.
+Now and then with that pretty, wayward,
+ruling instinct which makes us cats rivals of
+women, I try my power over him. When
+we are alone, I point my ears forward devilishly
+as a sign that I'm about to spring
+upon his scratching paper. The tap, tap,
+tap of my paws straight through pens
+and letters and everything scattered about,
+is addressed to him as well as the insistent
+miauling when I beg for liberty. &quot;Hymn
+to the Door-Knob,&quot; He laughingly calls it,
+or &quot;The Plaint of the Sequestered Cat.&quot;
+The tender contemplation of my inspiring
+eyes is for him alone; they weigh on his bent
+head, until the look I'm calling searches and
+meets mine in a shock of souls, so foreseen
+and so sweet, that I must needs close my lids
+to hide the exquisite shyness I feel.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/038.gif" width="542" height="154" /></p>
+
+<p>As for Her, she flutters about too much,
+often jostles me, holds my paws together
+and rocks me in the air, pets me in excited
+fashion, laughs aloud at me, imitates my
+voice too well&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>moved with indignation</i>)</p>
+
+<p>You're very hard to please! I certainly
+love Him; he's good and pretends not to see
+my faults, so that he won't have to scold,
+but She's the most beautiful thing in the
+world to me, the dearest and&mdash;the most
+difficult to understand. The sound of her
+step enchants me, her changeful eyes dispense
+happiness&mdash;and trouble. She's like
+Destiny itself, she never hesitates. Even
+torture from her hands&mdash;you know how She
+teases me?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Cruelly.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>No, not cruelly, but artfully. I never can
+tell what's coming next. This morning She
+bent down as if to speak to me, lifted
+one of my &quot;tiny elephant's ears,&quot; as She
+calls them, and sent a sharp cry into it, which
+went to the very back of my brain.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Horrors!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Was it right or wrong? I can't decide
+even now. It started waves of nervousness
+running madly through me. Then, She has
+a fancy for making me do tricks. Almost
+every day I must&mdash;&quot;Do the Fish, Toby
+dear.&quot; She lifts me in her arms and squeezes
+me until I gasp. My poor dumb mouth
+opens as a carp's does when they're drowning
+it in air....</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>That's <i>just</i> like Her!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Suddenly I find myself free&mdash;and still
+alive, miraculously saved by the power of
+her will. How beautiful life seems to me
+then! How fondly I lick the hand hanging
+at her side, the hem of her dress!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>contemptuously</i>)</p>
+
+<p>A pretty thing to do!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>All good and all evil come to me from
+Her. She is my worst torment and my one
+sure refuge. When I run to her, my heart
+sick with fear, how soft her arms are
+and how sweet her hair, falling in my face!
+I'm her &quot;black-baby,&quot; her &quot;Toby-Dog,&quot;
+her &quot;little bit o' love.&quot; She sits on the
+ground to reassure me, making herself little
+like me&mdash;lies down altogether and I go
+wild with delight at the sight of her face
+under mine, thrown back in her fragrant
+hair. My feelings overflow, I can't resist
+such a chance for a jolly good game. I
+rummage and fumble about, excitedly poking
+my nose everywhere, till I find the crispy
+tip of a pink ear&mdash;Her ear. I nibble it
+just enough to tickle her&mdash;to make her cry
+out: &quot;Stop, Toby! That's awful! Help!
+Help! This dog's devouring me!&quot;</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/041.gif" width="411" height="177" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+H'm! Simple, homely, wholesome joys!
+ ... And then, off you go to make friends
+with the cook.
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>And you,&mdash;with the cat at the farm.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>coldly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Enough I pray, that concerns no one but
+myself ... and the little cat.</p>
+
+<!--<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/043.gif" width="429" height="969" /></p>-->
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>A pretty conquest! It should make you
+blush&mdash;a seven-months-old kitten!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>roused</i>)</p>
+
+<p>For me she has all the charm of forbidden
+fruit and no one dare steal her from me.
+She is slim as a bean-pole....</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>aside</i>)</p>
+
+<p>You old rascal!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+... and long; poised on long legs she
+walks with the uncertain step common to all
+young things. She hunts field-mice, shrew-mice&mdash;even
+partridge, and this hard work
+in the fields has toughened her young muscles
+and given a rather gloomy expression to her
+kitten-face.
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>She's ugly.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>No, not ugly, but odd-looking. Her muzzle
+with its very pink nostrils strongly resembles
+that of a goat, her large ears remind
+one of a peasant's coif, her eyes the
+color of old gold are set slant-wise, and their
+naturally keen expression is varied by an
+occasional piquant squint.</p>
+
+<p>With what a will does she fly me confounding
+modesty with fear! I pass slowly
+by (one would think me quite uninterested),
+draped in my splendid coat. She's struck
+by its stripes. Oh, she'll come back, a little
+love-sick kitten, and putting aside all constraint
+she'll throw herself at my feet&mdash;like
+a supple white scarf&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I've no objection, you know.... I'm
+comparatively indifferent to all that concerns
+love. Here my time's so completely filled ... physical exercise ... my cares of
+watch-dog, I ... hardly give a thought to
+the bagatelle.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/044.gif" width="573" height="299" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>aside</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Bagatelle! ... He indulges in the persiflage
+of a traveling salesman!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I love&mdash;Her and Him devotedly, with a
+love that lifts me up to them. It suffices
+to occupy my time and heart.</p>
+
+<p>The hour of our siesta is passing, my
+scornful friend. Do you know, I like you
+in spite of your scorn and you like me, too.
+Don't turn your head away, your peculiar
+modesty would hide what you call frailty
+and what I call love. Do you think me
+blind? How often, on coming back to the
+house with Her, have I seen your little triangular
+face at the window, light up and
+smile at my approach,&mdash;the time to open
+the door and you'd already put on your cat's
+mask&mdash;your pretty Japanesy mask, with
+its narrow eyes.... Isn't it so?</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/045.gif" width="575" height="532" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>resolved not to hear</i>)</p>
+
+<p>The hour of the siesta is passing. The
+cone-shaped shadows of the pear trees grow
+long on the gravel path. We've talked away
+our sleepiness. You've forgotten the flies,
+your uneasy stomach, and the heat which
+dances in waves on the meadows. The beautiful,
+sultry day is dying. Already there's a
+breeze bringing perfume from the pines.
+Their trunks are melting into bright
+tears....</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Here She is! She's left her wicker chair,
+stretched her lovely arms and, judging from
+the movement of her dress, I think we're going
+to take a walk. See her behind the rosebushes?
+Now, with her nails she breaks
+a leaf from the lemon tree; she's crumpling
+it up and smelling it. Ah ... I belong to
+Her, soul and body. With my eyes closed I
+can divine her presence.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Yes, I see Her. She is quiet and gentle
+for the time being. He'll leave his paper
+now to follow her. He'll come out calling,
+&quot;Where are you?&quot; and sit on the bench,
+tired out. For <i>him</i>, I shall rise politely,
+and go &quot;do my nails&quot; along the leg of his
+trousers. Silent, happy companions, we'll
+listen for the day's departing footsteps.
+The perfume of the lindens will become
+sickeningly sweet at the same hour that my
+seer's eyes grow big and black and read
+mysterious Signs in the air.... Later on
+a calm fire will be lit down there, behind the
+pointed mountain&mdash;a circle of glistening
+rose-color in the gray-blue of the night&mdash;a
+sort of luminous cocoon from which will
+burst the dazzling edge of the moon. She
+will sail along, cleaving the clouds....
+Then, it will be time to go to rest. He'll
+carry me in on his shoulder and I'll sleep
+close to his feet, which are ever mindful of
+my repose.... Dawn will find me shivering
+but rejuvenated, sitting face to the sun, in
+a silvery halo of incense, offered me by the
+dew. Thus, I am a perfect picture of the
+god I was in the old, old days.</p>
+
+
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/048.gif" width="152" height="364" /></p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<a name="ON_THE_TRAIN"></a>
+<h2><b>ON THE TRAIN</b></h2>
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/052.gif" width="553" height="270" /></p>
+
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, TOBY-DOG, SHE <i>and</i> HE,
+<i>have taken their places in a first-class
+compartment. The train rolls along towards
+distant mountains, and the freedom
+of Summer-time</i>. TOBY, <i>on a leash, lifts
+an inquiring nose to the window</i>. HE
+<i>has strewn the carriage with newspapers</i>:
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, <i>silent and invisible in a
+closed basket, is under his immediate protection</i>.
+SHE, <i>leaning back against the
+dusty cushions, dreams of the mountain
+she loves best and of the low house on it,
+weighted down with jasmine and virginia-creeper</i>.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>How fast this carriage goes! It can't be
+our regular coachman. I haven't seen the
+horses, but they smell very bad and make
+black smoke. Oh, Silent Dreamer, look at me
+and tell me&mdash;shall we arrive soon?</p>
+
+<p>(<i>No response</i>. TOBY <i>gets
+fidgety and blows through
+his nostrils</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE</p>
+
+<p>Hush! Toby, hush!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I've hardly said a word.... Shall we
+arrive soon?</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He turns towards his master,
+who is reading, and puts
+a discreet paw on the edge
+of his knee</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE</p>
+
+<p>'Sh! ...</p>
+
+<!--<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/055a.gif" width="271" height="140" />-->
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>resigned</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Hard luck! No one wants to talk to
+me. I'm bored and what's more, I don't
+know this carriage well enough. I'm tired
+out. They woke me very early this morning.
+I amused myself by running all over
+the house. They had hidden the chairs
+under sheets, wrapped up the lamps, rolled
+up the rugs. Things were white and
+changed and awful. There was a horrid
+smell of camphor everywhere. My eyes
+filled with water, I sneezed under the chairs
+and slid on the bare floor in my haste to
+follow the maids' white aprons. They
+bustled about among trunks with such unwonted
+zeal, that I was sure something exceptional
+was going to happen.
+<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/055.gif" width="353" height="211" align="right" />
+At the last
+minute just as She came in, calling:
+&quot;Toby's collar and the cat's basket!
+Quick! put the cat in his basket!&quot;&mdash;just
+as she was saying that, my chum disappeared.
+It was indescribable! He, terrible
+to see, swore by all the gods, and
+struck the floor with his cane, furious because
+they had allowed his Kiki to get away.
+She called &quot;Kiki!&quot; at first supplicatingly,
+then in threatening tones, and the maids
+brought empty plates, meant to deceive, and
+yellow paper from the butcher's. I really
+thought my chum had left this world, when
+suddenly&mdash;there he was perched on top
+of the book-case, looking down on us with
+an expression of contempt in his green eyes.
+She put up her arms: &quot;Kiki <i>will</i> you
+come down immediately! You are going to
+make us lose the train!&quot; But he didn't come
+down and it made me dizzy&mdash;though I was
+on the ground&mdash;to see him way up there
+walking and turning about and miauling
+shrilly to tell us how impossible he found
+it to obey. He was about frantic and
+kept saying: &quot;Heavens, he's going to fall.&quot;
+But She smiled skeptically, went out of the
+room and came back armed with the whip.
+The whip said, &quot;crack!&quot; twice only; then a
+miracle happened I think, 'cause the cat
+leaped to the floor, softer and more bouncey
+than our plaything, the ball of wool. <i>I</i>
+would have broken to pieces falling like
+that! ... He has been in this basket ever
+since.... (TOBY <i>goes to the basket</i>.)
+Ah! here's a little peek-hole.... I see his
+whiskers ... they're like white needles.
+Whew! What eyes! (<i>He jumps back</i>.)
+I'm rather afraid. One can't really shut a
+cat up; he always manages to get out somehow.
+ ... He must suffer, poor fellow!
+Perhaps if I speak kindly to him ... (<i>he
+calls very politely</i>) Cat!</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/056.gif" width="479" height="250" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>spitting furiously</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Khhh! ...</p>
+
+
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>jumping back</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Oh, you said a bad word! You look awful!
+Have you a pain anywhere?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Go away! I'm a martyr.... Go away
+I tell you, or I'll blow fire at you!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>ingenuous</i>)</p>
+
+<p>But why?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Why!--Because you're free, because I'm
+in this basket, because the basket's in a foul
+carriage which is shaking me to pieces, and
+because the serenity of those two exasperates
+me.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Would you like me to look out and tell
+you what one sees from the carriage window?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Everything is equally odious to me.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>having looked out, comes back</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I haven't seen anything....</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>bitterly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Thanks just the same.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I mean I haven't seen anything that's
+easy to describe. Some green things which
+pass right close to us&mdash;so close and so fast
+that they give one a slap in the eye. A flat
+field turning 'round and 'round and over
+there, a little pointed steeple&mdash;it's running
+as fast as the carriage. Another field all
+red with blossoming clover has just given
+me another slap in the eye&mdash;a red slap.
+The earth is sinking in&mdash;or else we're going
+up, I'm not sure which. I see way off,
+<i>far</i> away, some green lawns dotted with white
+daisies&mdash;perhaps they're cows.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>with sarcasm</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Or wafers, for sealing letters&mdash;or anything
+you like.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Aren't you the least little bit amused?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>with a sinister laugh</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Ha! Ask of the damned ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Of whom?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>more and more melodramatic,
+but without conviction</i>)</p>
+
+ ... of the damned in his vat of boiling
+oil, if anything amuses him! Mine is not
+physical torment. I suffer imprisonment,
+humiliation, darkness, neglect&mdash;
+
+<p>(<i>The train stops. A conductor
+on the platform cries
+&quot;Aw-ll a-bor!! ... awl
+aborr!!&quot;</i>)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>bewildered</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Someone's crying out! There's an accident!!
+Let's run!!!</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He throws himself against
+the carriage door and
+scratches madly at it</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE, (<i>half asleep</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Toby dear, you're a nuisance!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>distracted</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Oh, you inexplicable person! How can
+you sit there quietly? Don't you hear those
+cries? They're stopping now&mdash;the accident
+has gone away. Wish I'd known...</p>
+
+<p>(<i>The train starts again</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE, (<i>throwing down his paper</i>)</p>
+
+<p>The poor beast is hungry.</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE, (<i>now very wide awake</i>)</p>
+
+<p>You think so? Well, I am too. But
+Toby is to eat very little.</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE, (<i>anxiously</i>)</p>
+
+<p>And Kiki-the-Demure?</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE, (<i>peremptorily</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Kiki sulks, and he hid this morning, so he'll
+have even less than Toby.</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE</p>
+
+<p>He isn't making a sound. Aren't you
+afraid he's sick?</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE</p>
+
+<p>No, he's simply vexed.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>as soon as there's question
+of himself</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Me-ow!</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE, (<i>tenderly and eagerly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Come my beautiful Kiki, my imprisoned
+one, come. You shall have cold roast-beef
+and some breast of chicken...</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He opens the prison basket
+and</i> KIKI <i>puts forth his</i>
+<i>head, flattened on top like
+that of a serpent; then his
+long, striped body, cautiously,
+and so very slowly
+that one begins to think it's
+coming out by the yard</i>.)</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/061.gif" width="491" height="296" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>pleasantly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Ah, there you are, cat! Well, now, proclaim
+your freedom!</p>
+
+<p>(KIKI, <i>without replying,
+smoothes his ruffled fur</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/062a.gif" width="209" height="290" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Proclaim your freedom I tell you! It's
+the custom. Whenever a door is opened one
+must run, jump, twist oneself into half circles
+and cry out.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p><i>One</i>? Who's one, pray?</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/062b.gif" width="291" height="244" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>We dogs.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>seated and very dignified</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Would you have me <i>bark</i>, too? ... We
+have never followed the same rules of conduct,
+that I know of.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>vexed</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Oh very well, I don't insist. How do
+you like this carriage?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>sniffing fastidiously</i>)</p>
+
+<p>It's frightful.&mdash;However, the cushions
+are rather good for one's nails.</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He suits the action to the
+word</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>aside</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Now if <i>I</i> did that...</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>continuing to scratch
+the upholstery</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Hon! May this spongy, gray cloth soothe
+my rage! ... Since morning, the whole
+universe has been in a state of monstrous
+revolt. He whom I love, and who venerates
+me, made not the least effort to defend me.
+I've submitted to humiliating contacts, been
+jolted to death, piercing whistles have shot
+through my head from ear to ear. Ho, ho,
+how good it is to relax the nerves and to
+imagine that, with gleeful claws, one tears
+the enemies' flesh in bloody shreds! Ho, ho!
+S-c-r-a-t-c-h, and lift the paws on high!
+Lift them high as possible! It's a supremely
+insolent gesture....</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE</p>
+
+<p>I say, Kiki, when are you going to stop
+that?</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE, (<i>Indulgent and admiring</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Let him alone. He's doing his nails.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>He has spoken for me. I forgive him.
+But since it's allowed, I don't care any more
+about tearing the cushions ... When will I
+get out of this? Not that I'm afraid; they
+are both there, and the dog too, with their
+everyday faces ... I've twinges in my
+stomach.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/065.gif" width="342" height="146" /></p>
+
+<p>(<i>He yawns. The train stops.
+A conductor on the platform
+cries, &quot;Aw-ll a-bor!
+Aw-ll a-b-o-r-r!!&quot;</i>)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>excited</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Screaming again! Another accident?!--Let's
+run!...</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Heavens, what a tiresome dog! What
+does it matter to him, if there <i>is</i> an accident?</p>
+
+<p>I don't believe in it moreover. It's the cry
+of a man, and men cry out for the pleasure
+of hearing their own voices.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>calm again</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I'm hungry. Can't we hope to eat soon,
+my mistress? I don't know what time it is
+in this strange country, but it seems to
+me...</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE</p>
+
+<p>Come now, we'll all have our luncheon.</p>
+
+<p>(<i>She takes the things out of
+the basket, crumples up
+some tissue paper and
+breaks a crisp brown roll</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>chewing</i>)</p>
+
+<p>What She gave me then must have been
+very good indeed to seem such a tiny bit.
+It melted in my mouth, there's not even the
+memory of it left...</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/066.gif" width="373" height="211" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>chewing</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Breast of chicken! Purr-rr ... Goodness
+me! I was purring without knowing it!
+That won't do. They'll think me resigned
+to this journey. I must eat slowly, grim,
+and undeceived, eat for the sole purpose of
+keeping myself alive...</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE, (<i>to the dog and cat</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Allow me to have <i>my</i> luncheon now, if you
+please. <i>I</i> too, like cold chicken and the
+hearts of lettuce, dipped in salt...</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE, (<i>anxiously</i>)</p>
+
+<p>What <i>shall</i> we do to make this cat go into
+his basket again?</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE</p>
+
+<p>I don't know. We'll see presently...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Finished already? I could swallow three
+times that much. I say Cat, you're eating
+rather well for a martyr.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>fibbing</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Trouble digs a hole in one's interior.
+Move away please, I want to sleep now ...
+if I can. Perhaps a merciful dream will
+take me back to the house I've left, to the
+flowered cushion He gave me.... Home!
+sweet home! Rugs of bright colors for the
+delight of my eyes, a palm with nice shoots
+for me to eat, deep arm-chairs, under
+which I hide my woolen ball as a future surprise
+for myself&mdash;ah, and the cork hanging
+by a string to the door-latch! the tables
+covered with bibelots! I thread my way
+in and out among them and occasionally
+it amuses me to break some brittle thing.
+The dining-room is a temple! The vestibule,
+full of mystery; there unseen, I can
+watch those who come and go ... Oh narrow
+back-stairway, where the step of the
+milkman rings out for me like a morning
+angelus&mdash;farewell! farewell! my destiny
+carries me on, and who knows if ever ...
+But this is <i>too</i> sad! All the pretty things
+I've been saying have really begun to make
+me feel badly!!</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/068.gif" width="438" height="295" /></p>
+
+<p>(<i>He begins a minute and
+mournful toilet. The train
+stops. A conductor on the
+platform cries, &quot;Aw-ll-a-borr-a-borr!!&quot;</i>)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>There it is again! An acci&mdash;Oh
+bother, I've had enough of that!</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE, (<i>anxiously</i>)</p>
+
+<p>We're going to change trains in ten minutes.
+How about the cat? He'll never allow
+us to shut him up...</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE</p>
+
+<p>We'll see ... Suppose we put some meat
+in his basket?</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE</p>
+
+<p>Or perhaps petting would...</p>
+
+<p>(<i>They approach the redoubtable</i>
+KIKI <i>and both speak
+together</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE</p>
+
+<p>Kiki, my beautiful Kiki, come jump on my
+knee, or on my shoulder. You like that
+as a rule. You'll doze there and then I'll
+put you gently into the basket. After all,
+it's open-work and has a comfortable cushion
+to protect you from the rough wicker.
+Come, my dear....</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE</p>
+
+<p>Listen, Kiki. You must learn to act
+properly and to take life as it is. You can't
+stay there like that. We're going to change
+trains and a horrible guard will appear and
+say insulting things of you and your race.
+Besides you'd better obey, because if you
+don't, I&mdash;I'll give you a good whipping.</p>
+
+<p>(<i>But before she can lift her hand
+against his sacred fur, Kiki gets up,
+stretches himself, arches his back, yawns,&mdash;to
+show the rosy lining of his mouth,
+and then walks to the open basket
+where he lies down with an admirable air
+of quiet insolence. He and She exchange
+eloquent glances</i>.)</p>
+
+
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/071.gif" width="490" height="512" /></p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<a name="DINNER_IS_LATE"></a>
+<h2><b>DINNER IS LATE</b></h2>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/074.gif" width="587" height="244" /></p>
+
+<p><i>A parlor, in the country, at the close of a
+long summer's day</i>. KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+<i>and</i> TOBY-DOG <i>doze; ears twitching and
+eyelids obstinately shut. Now</i> KIKI'S <i>lids
+part in a narrow slit, and disclose eyes the
+color of purple grapes. He yawns, with
+the ferocious expression of a small
+dragon.</i></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>haughtily</i>)</p>
+
+<p>You're snoring!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>who was not really asleep</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I'm not; it's you.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Impossible! I don't snore, I purr.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Same thing.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>not condescending to a
+discussion</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Thank heaven, it isn't! (<i>A silence</i>.)</p>
+
+<p>I'm hungry. One doesn't hear the noise
+of plates in the next room. Isn't it dinner
+time?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>gets up, slowly stretches his
+forepaws and yawns, darting forth a
+heraldic tongue with curly end</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I don't know ... I'm hungry.</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/076.gif" width="323" height="216" align="right"/></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Where is She? How is it you're not at
+her heels?</p>
+
+
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>embarrassed, nibbling his nails</i>)</p>
+
+<p>She's in the garden I believe, picking up
+plums.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Those yellow balls that rain about one's
+ears? I know them. You've seen her then?
+I bet She scolded you ... What have you
+been doing now?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>self-conscious, turning away his
+wrinkled, toad-like face</i>)</p>
+
+<p>She told me to return to the house because&mdash;because
+I too, was eating plums.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>She did well! You have depraved tastes&mdash;the
+tastes of men.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>offended</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Say&mdash;no one ever sees me eating bad
+fish! And never, <i>never</i> will I understand how
+you can go into such fits over a dead frog,
+or that herb.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Valerian.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>That's it, I guess ... An herb&mdash;is medicine,
+isn't it?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Medicine, indeed! Valerian ... but no
+<i>you</i>, can't understand ... I've seen Her
+laugh and go on, as I do over the valerian,
+after having emptied a glass of fetid wine
+that jumped dangerously too. As for the
+dead frog&mdash;so dead that it seems a bit of
+dry russia leather in the form of a frog&mdash;it's
+a sachet, impregnated with rare musk,
+with which I wish to scent my fur.</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/077.gif" width="327" height="231" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Oh, you talk very well&mdash;but She always
+scolds and says that you smell bad after it,
+and He says the same thing.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/078.gif" width="572" height="960" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>They're nothing but Two-Paws, both of
+them. You, poor thing, belittle yourself
+by seeking to imitate them. You stand on
+your hind legs, wear a coat when it rains,
+eat plums&mdash;for shame!--and those big
+green balls, the malicious trees let fall sometimes,
+when I'm passing underneath.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Apples?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Very likely. She picks one up and
+throws it down the path, crying: &quot;Apple,
+Toby, apple,&quot; and you rush after, in unseemly
+fashion, gasping for breath, looking
+like a fool, your tongue and your eyes sticking
+out ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>scowling, head resting on his
+paws</i>)</p>
+
+<p>One takes one's pleasures where one finds
+them.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>yawning, shows his
+pointed teeth and his palate of pink velvet</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I'm hungry. Dinner is surely late tonight.
+Suppose you look for Her?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I daren't. She forbade it. She is down
+there in the hollow, with a big basket. The
+dew is falling and wetting her feet and the
+sun's going away. But you know how She is.
+She sits on the damp ground, looking ahead
+of her, as if She were asleep&mdash;or lies flat on
+her stomach, whistling and watching an
+ant in the grass ... She tears up a handful
+of wild thyme and smells it, or calls the
+tomtits and the jays&mdash;who never come to
+her by any chance. She takes a heavy
+watering pot and&mdash;ugh! it gives me the
+shivers&mdash;pours thousands of icy, silvery
+threads over the roses or into the hollows
+of those little stone troughs, 'way back in
+the woods. I always look in to see the
+head of a brindle-bull who comes to meet
+me and to drink up the pictures of the
+leaves, but She pulls me back by the collar
+with: &quot;Toby, Toby, <i>that</i> water is for the
+birds.&quot; ... Then She takes out her knife
+and opens nuts, fifty, a <i>hundred</i> nuts, and
+forgets the time ... There's no end to the
+things She does.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>slyly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>And what do you do all that time?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I&mdash;well&mdash;I just wait for her.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" src="gifs/081a.gif" width="521" height="287" alt=" " /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I admire you!</p>
+
+<p class="center">&nbsp;</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Once in a while, squatting down, She
+eagerly scratches the earth, toils and sweats
+over it; then I jump 'round her, delighted
+to see her at something so useful and so
+familiar. But her feeble scent deceives her.
+<i>I</i> never smell mole, or shrew-mouse-of-the-rosy-paws,
+in the holes <i>She</i> digs. And how
+explain her utter lack of purpose? Presently,
+falling back on her haunches, She
+brandishes a hairy-rooted herb and cries:
+&quot;I have it, the jade!&quot; I lie in the damp
+grass and tremble, or dig my nose
+(She calls it my snout) into the earth
+to get the complicated odors of it. ... When there are three or four
+scents all blended, all mixed together,
+can you distinguish that of the
+mole from that of the hare which passed
+quickly, or the bird which rested there?</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" src="gifs/081b.gif" width="551" height="433" alt=" " /></p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" src="gifs/082a.gif" width="570" height="303" alt=" " /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Certainly I can. My nose is highly educated.
+It's small, regular, wide between
+my eyes, delicate at the chamois-skin end
+of my nostrils; the lightest touch of a blade
+of grass, the shadow of smoke tickles and
+makes it sneeze. It doesn't bother about
+distinguishing the scent of moles from that
+of&mdash;hares, did you say? But it delights
+in the trace left by a cat in a hedge ... I've
+a charming nose. She calls it, &quot;his pretty
+little nose of cotton velvet.&quot; Since my eyes
+opened on this world I've not known the day
+that someone has not uttered a truthful flattery
+on the subject of my nose. Now yours&mdash;is
+a rough-grained truffle. What makes
+you move it so ridiculously? At this very
+moment.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/082b.gif" width="550" height="301" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I'm hungry and I don't hear the plates.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+... your truffle of a nose works up and
+down and makes another wrinkle in your
+irregular mug.
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>She always says, &quot;his square muzzle, his
+wrinkled truffle,&quot; so tenderly and so lovingly!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+... And you think of nothing but eating.
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>It's <i>your</i> empty stomach that scolds and
+complains and wants to quarrel with me.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I've a charming stomach.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>But no, it's your nose that's charming.
+You just said so.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>My stomach too. There's none more fastidious,
+more whimsical, stronger and at the
+same time more delicate. It digests the
+bones of sole, but meat that's the least bit
+tainted literally turns it.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Literally's the word. You have <i>active</i>
+indigestion.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Yes, the whole house is affected by it.
+From the very first qualms I'm in terrible
+distress; the earth gives way under me, my
+eyes dilate, I hurriedly swallow quantities
+of salty saliva; involuntary, ventriloquial
+cries escape me, my sides bulge out&mdash;</p>
+
+<!--<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/085.gif" width="327" height="100" /></p>-->
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>disgusted</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I say, if it's all the same to you, tell me
+the rest after dinner.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I'm hungry. Where can He be?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>He's there, in his study, scratching paper.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/086.gif" width="530" height="241" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>He's always doing that. It's a game.
+Two-Paws play at the same thing for hours
+and hours. I've often tried to scratch
+paper gently, as He does, but the pleasure
+doesn't last long. I prefer newspapers torn
+into shreds that rustle and fly ... There is
+a little pot of dark-violet, muddy water on
+his table. I never sniff it without horror,
+since the day a rather foolish curiosity made
+me dip my paw into it. This very paw, so
+strong and aristocratic, (the tufts of useless
+hair you see between my toes proclaim the
+purity of my race) this very paw bore a
+bluish stain for eight days and the degrading
+odor of rusty steel clung to it a long time
+after ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>What's the little pot for?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>He drinks from it doubtless.</p>
+
+<p>(<i>Silence</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>She's not back yet! Heaven grant She
+isn't lost, as I was one day in the streets of
+Paris!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I'm hungry!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I'm hungry! What are we going to eat
+this evening?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I saw a chicken. It made a silly noise
+and dropped red blood on the kitchen floor,
+soiling it far more than I ever did, or you
+either&mdash;yet no one whipped it. But Emily
+put it in the fire, to teach it a lesson. I
+licked up some of the blood ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>yawns</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Chicken ... it makes my mouth water.
+She'll say: &quot;Here Toby, bones!&quot; and
+throw me the carcass.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>How badly you speak! He says: &quot;Little
+chicken bones, Kiki, little chicken bones!&quot;</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>surprised</i>)</p>
+
+<p>But no <i>really</i> it's, &quot;Here, Toby, bones!&quot;
+that She says.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>He speaks better than She does.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>incompetent</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Ah? ... Tell me, do birds taste anything
+like chicken?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>whose eyes light up
+suddenly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>No ... they're far better, they're alive.
+Ha, the quivering bird, the warm feathers,
+the delicious little brain ... you feel it all
+crackling between your teeth!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Oh, you make me sick! It always worries
+me to see tiny animals like that flutter about
+... and birds are dear, good little things.
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>dryly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Don't you believe it, they're only good
+to eat. They're noisy, stupid creatures, infatuated
+with themselves, <i>made</i> to be eaten.
+ ... You know the two jays?
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Not very well.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/089a.gif" width="491" height="226" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>They live in the little wood. When I
+walk by they laugh a sardonic &quot;tiac, tiac,&quot;
+because I wear a bell at my neck. In vain
+do I hold my head very stiffly and put my
+paws down <i>very</i> gently, my bell tinkles and
+the two creatures scream from the top of the
+fir-tree. Just let me get hold of them, one
+of these days! ...</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He lays back his ears and
+raises the hair along his
+back</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/089b.gif" width="485" height="207" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>pensive</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Positively, Cat, there are times when I
+don't know you. We are talking quietly and
+suddenly you bristle like a bottle-brush;
+or we happen to be playing amicably together
+and I bark behind your back&mdash;bow,
+wow-wow!--just for fun; then,&mdash;one
+doesn't know why, perhaps because my nose
+has grazed the long hairs on your legs you're
+so proud of&mdash;you become all at once a savage
+beast, spitting fire, and charging at me
+like a strange dog. Don't you think that
+shows a bad character?</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/090.gif" width="567" height="238" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>mysterious, eyes half-closed</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Not at all. It's character, simply. A
+Cat's character. In such moments of irritability,
+I'm keenly alive to the humiliation
+of my present state, and that of my race.</p>
+
+<p>I can remember a time when priests in
+long, linen tunics, bending low, spoke to us
+and humbly tried to comprehend our chanted
+utterance. Know, dog, that it is not <i>we</i> who
+have changed! It may be, there are days
+when I'm more myself, when everything offends
+me, and justly; a brusque gesture, a
+vulgar laugh, the banging of a door, your
+odor, your inconceivable impudence when
+you touch me, or encircle me, jumping and
+yelping ...</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/091.gif" width="507" height="180" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>patiently, to himself</i>)</p>
+
+<p>He's having one of his attacks.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>with a start</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Did you hear?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Yes, the kitchen door, and the door into
+the dining-room ... and now the drawer
+where the spoons are kept. At last! At
+last! aaah! (<i>He yawns</i>.) I can't stand
+this any longer. <i>Where</i> is She? I don't
+hear the gravel creaking ... night's coming
+on!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>ironically</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Go find her.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>And how about Him? He usually worries,
+and comes in asking, &quot;Where is She?&quot;
+But He's scratching still. He must have
+drunk up all the violet-colored water in the
+muddy little pot by this time. (TOBY <i>carefully
+stretches his legs</i>.) Ah! I feel lively
+ ... and empty. We're going to eat soon!
+Just smell the good kitchen-smells that come
+under the door! ... Let's play!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>No.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Run, I'll chase, without touching you.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>No.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Why not?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I don't want to.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Oh! but you're tiresome! Watch me
+jump and arch my neck like a little horse
+and try to catch my stubby tail. Now I
+turn 'round and 'round&mdash;and&mdash;heavens!
+the whole room spins!--It's&mdash;st&mdash;opping&mdash;now.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Insufferable creature!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Insufferable yourself! Look out, I'm going
+to run at you as She does, when She's
+merry, crying &quot;Ha, cat!&quot;</p>
+
+<p class="center">(KIKI-THE-DEMURE, <i>without
+rising, puts up a paw bristling
+with claws and spotted
+underneath with rose color
+and black; it looks like a
+thorny flower</i>.)</p>
+
+<p>If you dare! ...</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/093.gif" width="521" height="411" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>in a frenzy</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I do dare! Bow-wow-wow! Ha, cat! ha,
+cat!</p>
+
+<p>(KIKI-THE-DEMURE, <i>exasperated,
+gives a spring and
+hangs on the table-cloth,
+slowly dragging it down.
+A lamp and various things
+fall to the ground. Terrified
+silence. The two animals,
+crouching under an
+arm-chair, await punishment</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">HE <i>appears at the study door, holding
+a pen, like a bit, between his teeth</i>.</p>
+
+<p>Thunder and blitzen! What is it now?
+This cursed menagerie has overturned everything!
+Where's your Mistress? What a
+place this is to be sure! Dinner never on
+time! ... (etc., etc., etc....)</p>
+
+<p>(<i>The two guilty ones, who
+well know the harmlessness
+of such outbursts, laugh
+quietly to themselves and
+lying flat as bed-room slippers,
+look at one another
+through the fringes of the
+chair. The garden gate
+opens</i>.</p>
+
+<p>SHE <i>comes in carrying a
+basket, full of fragrant
+plums; her hands are sticky
+from their sugariness, her
+hair tumbled</i>. SHE <i>stands
+horrified, before the disaster</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/095.gif" width="467" height="383" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE</p>
+
+<p>Oh! They've been fighting again, have
+they? (<i>Without conviction</i>.) Dear <i>me,</i>
+what nasty creatures! I'll give them away!
+I'll sell them!!--I'll <i>kill</i> them!!!</p>
+
+<p>(<i>But the cat and dog, groveling
+in exaggerated humility,
+crawl up to her, and
+speak together</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Purr-rr-rr!...There you are!...It's
+very late...Toby attacked me; it's he
+who's broken everything. I believe he went
+mad from hunger.... You smell good, of
+grass and the twilight. You sat down on
+some wild thyme. Come!...Tell your
+Master to carry me on his shoulder&mdash;the
+meat will be overdone, I'm afraid. You'll
+carve the chicken very quickly, won't you,
+and you'll keep the browned skin for me? If
+you wish I'll stretch out my paw like a spoon,
+which knows how to take up the littlest morsels,
+and carry them to my mouth with that
+human gesture that makes you laugh so&mdash;you
+and He.... Come!</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/096.gif" width="498" height="303" align="right" /></p>
+<br clear="all" />
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Hiii ... hiii ... there you are at last!
+I'm so unhappy when you're away. You
+banished me ... you didn't love me ...
+The lamp fell down all by itself ... Come!
+I'm awfully hungry, but I'll gladly go without
+dinner, if you'll promise to take me with
+you always wherever you go ... yes, even
+out in the twilight, though it makes me sad,
+I'll willingly follow you there ... my nose
+close, close to the hem of your dress....</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE, (<i>disarmed and quite indifferent to the
+cataclysm</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Do look how pretty they are!</p>
+
+
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/097.gif" width="303" height="210" /></p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+
+<a name="SHE_IS_ILL"></a>
+
+<h2><b>SHE IS ILL</b></h2>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/100a.gif" width="197" height="245" align="left"/></p>
+<br clear="left" />
+<p><i>A bed-room in the country-house; autumnal
+sunshine filters in through closed blinds</i>.
+SHE <i>lies on a couch, apparently asleep,
+dressed in a white woolen gown</i>. KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+<i>makes his toilet on a narrow
+console-table</i>. TOBY-DOG, <i>on the carpet,
+in a sphinx-like attitude, watches</i> HER
+<i>and at the same time, is attentive to the
+words of his master, who is leaving the
+room on tip-toe.</i></p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/100b.gif" width="363" height="152" align="right"/></p>
+
+
+<p class="center">HE, (<i>in a very low voice to the two animals</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Sh! Don't wake her. Be good. I'm going
+downstairs, to write.</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He closes the door noiselessly
+after him</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>to</i> KIKI-THE-DEMURE)</p>
+
+<p>What did He say?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I don't know. Something vague. Directions,
+like: stay there, good-by.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>He said, &quot;'Sh!&quot; <i>I'm</i> not making any noise.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>ironically</i>)</p>
+
+<p>They're astonishing! They say &quot;no
+noise,&quot; and thereupon walk off with a step a
+deaf rat could hear two miles away.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Some truth in that. (<i>He looks at the
+sleeping figure on the couch</i>.) Her face still
+looks very small. She's asleep. If you
+jump down from that table don't land with
+a big thump.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>stiffly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Ah, you're teaching me to jump now, are
+you? Oh, worthy counselor! (<i>quoting</i>) Put
+a beggar in your barn and he'll make himself
+your heir.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>What's that?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Nothing. An Oriental proverb. If I
+wished, dog, to disturb the silence of this
+room I'd be clever enough to choose a rickety
+chair; its feet would pound out a regular
+tic-toc, tic-toc, tic-toc, in time with my
+tongue as I washed myself. It's a means
+I've invented to gain my liberty. Tic-toc,
+tic-toc, says the chair. She happens to be
+reading or writing, is easily irritated, and
+cries, &quot;Be quiet, Kiki!&quot; But I go on unconscious
+of any wrong-doing; tic-toc, tic-toc.
+She jumps up distracted and opens
+the door wide for me: slowly, like one exiled, I
+cross its threshold and once outside, laugh
+to find myself so superior to them all.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>who hasn't been listening,
+yawns</i>)</p>
+
+<p>What a sad week, eh? I don't know what
+it is to take a walk any more. I haven't
+taken any pleasure in eating either, since She
+fell from her horse.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Heavens, one can love people and care for
+one's stomach too.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>with ardor</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Not I! When She screamed and fell from
+her horse, I felt the heart crack inside me.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>That affair couldn't have ended otherwise.
+One doesn't go climbing up on a horse! People
+don't do such things! I see nothing but
+extravagance around me. To begin
+with, a horse is a fearful monstrosity.</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/104.gif" width="144" height="224" align="right" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>indignantly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Did one ever hear the like!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>peremptorily</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I happen to have had the opportunity of
+making a very close study of one....</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>aside</i>)</p>
+
+<p>He makes me laugh!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+... It was the farmer's horse that grazed
+in the meadow. My life, for a whole month,
+was embittered by that roving mountain.
+Lying under the hedge, I could see his heavy
+feet disfiguring the ground. I breathed his
+vulgar odor and heard his strident cry shaking
+the air. Once when he was eating the
+lower twigs of the hedge, I saw myself&mdash;the
+whole of me&mdash;reflected in one of his
+eyes! I fled ... and from that day my hatred
+was so strong that I wildly hoped to
+annihilate the monster. I'll go up to him,
+thought I, I'll plant myself firmly in front
+of him, and the desire of his death will be
+so strong in my eyes, that perhaps, he'll die
+when he meets my look...
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>diverted</i>)</p>
+
+<p>And then?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>continuing</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I carried out my plan. But the horse I
+had waited for in fear and trembling, just
+blew through his nostrils a long jet of foul-smelling
+vapor, and <i>I</i> fell back in atrocious
+convulsions.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>Inwardly writhing with laughter</i>)</p>
+
+<p>You don't exaggerate?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>serious</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Never! And She must needs go climbing
+on a horse's back, holding fast to four
+cords, one leg this side and the other that. ... Strange aberration!
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>We don't think alike, Cat. For me, the
+horse is, after man, the most beautiful thing
+in the world.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>vexed</i>)</p>
+
+<p>And where do I come in?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>evasive and courteous</i>)</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/106.gif" width="188" height="212" align="right" /></p>
+
+<p>Oh, you're a <i>Cat</i>. But a horse, and with
+Her on his back! What a beautiful picture
+they make, high up in the blue air!
+To gaze on it, I have to throw my head 'way
+back on my thick neck. The horse lends
+her his speed. Now at last, She can race
+with me when I go off on a mad run. Sometimes
+I'm ahead, ears floating back and
+tongue hanging out like a little flag&mdash;the
+angular shadow of the horse on the road in
+front. If I follow her, a fragrant dust
+blows back at me. It smells of warm leather,
+moist beast, and a little of her own perfume
+too. The road runs under me, like a
+ribbon that someone is pulling. Oh, what
+joy it is to be so little and so swift, running
+along in the shadow of a great galloping
+horse! When we halt, I pant like a motor,
+between the legs of my friend, who snorts
+and in the kindliest way puts down his fettered
+mouth and sprinkles me ...</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/107.gif" width="527" height="510" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I know, I know! The horse &quot;with long
+mane ashake; hoofs, heavy with tumult;
+eyes, glimmering white.&quot; ...You are the
+last of the Romanticists.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I'm not the last of the Romanticists. I'm
+a little bull-dog that came into the world
+one evening, almost under the feet of a chestnut
+mare. She didn't lie down all night
+long, she was so afraid of crushing my
+mother and her puppies. A little bull-dog
+like me is almost the child of a horse. I lay
+in the warm straw against her warm flanks,
+I drank out of the stable pails. I used to
+get up when I heard the sound of hoofs
+coming in and I took an interest in the
+washing of the carriages, until the day
+She came and picked me out&mdash;<i>me</i>, the best-looking,
+the most snub-nosed, the stockiest of
+the litter. (<i>Sighing</i>.) And there She lies,
+so dreadfully quiet! It makes me sad to see
+her with that little cloth still 'round her
+ankle. You remember when He picked her
+up in his arms? He held her&mdash;and She's a
+lot bigger than I am&mdash;just as if She were
+a little dog that he was going to drown....</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/108.gif" width="273" height="245" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>bitterly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I remember. I was at the top of the
+stairs irritated by the noise, but curious.
+He came up and pushed me aside with his
+foot, as he would have done if a piece of
+furniture had happened to be in his way.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Is that why you stayed away from this
+room&mdash;her room&mdash;for three whole days?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>hesitating</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Yes ... and for another reason too.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>What reason?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Because of the fever.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>carried away by his love</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Her fever smells better than other peoples'
+good health!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>shrugging his shoulders</i>)</p>
+
+<p>And they talk of a dog's scent! Truly
+the convictions of Two-Paws are based upon
+childish fables. You know of course that
+fever&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>in a low tone</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Makes one afraid, yes.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>in a low tone</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Makes one afraid, gives one cold shivers
+down one's back, distaste for everything and
+uneasiness all over. One hesitates on the
+threshold of a room where there is fever,
+searching fearfully some hidden thing....
+She was in bed and burning hot. I looked at
+her a long time, ready to run, saying to myself:
+&quot;Who can be with her there&mdash;behind
+the curtains&mdash;who is it stifles and torments
+her and makes her moan in her sleep?&quot;</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>frightened retrospectively</i>)</p>
+
+<p>There wasn't anyone, was there?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>No one but He&mdash;and the fever. He, the
+most intelligent of Two-Paws, was leaning
+over her listening to her breathing, dimly
+aware of an invisible presence. I overcame
+my aversion and looked at her. I was melancholy
+and jealous. He must love her,
+thought I, to go so near and defend her,
+to kiss her, imbued as She is with the evil
+charm. Would He hold me to his heart, if
+I&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>imperatively</i>)</p>
+
+<p>'Sh!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>What?</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/112.gif" width="574" height="246" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>She stirred.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>No.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>alert, looking at her</i>)</p>
+
+<p>No ... She didn't stir, but her thoughts
+did. I felt them. Continue.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>who has recovered his
+equanimity</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I don't know now what we were talking
+about.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>The fev&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>quickly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Enough. Don't recall it. Fever is the
+beginning of the thing one never speaks of.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>shivering</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Yes, I know.... I don't like an animal
+that can't move. You know what I mean ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>laughing cruelly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Nor do I. I can only eat live birds, and
+as for the tiny mice, I prefer to swallow
+them, squeak and all ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Why does it amuse you to horrify me?
+You've a certain vanity that I can't understand.
+It consists in exaggerating cruelties
+that are already real enough. You call me
+the last of the Romanticists, aren't you the
+first of the Sadics?</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/113.gif" width="236" height="368" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Oh dog, poisoned with literature! An
+eternal misunderstanding separates us.
+&quot;I'm a little bull-dog,&quot; you replied just now,
+with that stupid sincerity which disarms me.
+Let me say to you in my turn, &quot;I am a
+Cat.&quot; The name is sufficient dispensation.
+There is in me a hatred of pain and ugliness,
+an overmastering detestation of all
+that offends my sight, or my reason. When
+the concierge's cat dragged around his
+wounded paw, I threw myself upon him, fired
+by a righteous anger, and until he stopped
+his whining I&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>supplicatingly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Don't tell me!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>getting angry</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Understand then, once and for all&mdash;if
+the pale recital of what I did upsets you&mdash;that
+I wished to abolish, to annihilate in that
+bleeding animal the suggestion of my own
+inevitable death ...</p>
+
+<p>(<i>They are quiet for a little
+while</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>shuddering</i>)</p>
+
+<p>This confinement does us no good. I
+would gladly go out into the soft sunshine
+and do &quot;the bayadeer's dance,&quot; as He
+calls it, on the dry gravel among the leaves,
+which look like fried potatoes. Everything
+is yellow out-of-doors. My green eyes would
+reflect the golden sun and the flaming woods
+and so turn yellow too. ... Now I'll think
+only of what is joyous and yellow, the beautiful,
+cold Autumn, the rosy dawn that leaves
+its colors in the foliage of the cherry-tree
+ ... Come, let's prove the strength of our
+legs and enjoy to the full the consciousness
+that youth has only just begun for us ...
+Who knows, death may never come ...</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He jumps down from the
+console-table, without making
+the least noise</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>stopping him</i>)</p>
+
+<p>What are you going to do?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Scratch at the door, and strike up the
+&quot;Hymn of the Sequestered Cat.&quot;</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/115.gif" width="188" height="449" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>indicating the figure on the
+couch</i>)</p>
+
+<p>And doubtless waken Her?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>stubbornly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I'll sing in a very small voice.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>And you'll scratch with your tiniest claws,
+I suppose? Stay here quietly, He commanded
+it when He went away.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>loftily</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Does He command me? He beseeches me,
+and that's my only reason for obeying him.</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He sits down again, apparently
+resigned, and yawns
+slowly</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>yawning</i>)</p>
+
+<p>You make me yawn.</p>
+
+
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>On the contrary, it's you who bore me.
+(<i>Temptingly</i>.) You're thinking what a
+good thing freedom is, aren't you? ... A
+hen has probably escaped from the chicken
+yard&mdash;what sport you're missing!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>You really think so?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I said: probably.... Have you finished
+exploring that rabbit's hole?</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/117.gif" width="347" height="148" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>disturbed</i>)</p>
+
+<p>No ... it's so very deep! I almost buried
+myself, hollowing it out yesterday. The
+earth that stuck to my muzzle had some of
+the animal's fur in it ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>more and more satanic</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I suppose you'll finish that to-morrow ...
+or some other day.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>sadly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Why not say next year, while you're
+about it?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>What's the matter with you? Your shiny
+black lip hangs down an ell, and your froggy
+eyes glitter with tears. Are you crying?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>sniffling</i>)</p>
+
+<p>No ...</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/118.gif" width="375" height="144" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Poor, sensitive heart, console yourself.
+You'll have your pleasures and your friends
+again. At this very moment the farmer's
+dog is crunching bones in the kitchen ...
+to beguile the long wait for you.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>overcome</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Oh! oh! the farmer's dog!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>She's not alone either; that great dane,
+the watch-dog, keeps her company.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>rebellious</i>)</p>
+
+<p>That's not true!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Go see.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>after one bound toward the
+door</i>)</p>
+
+<p>No, that would make noise.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>You're right, it would.</p>
+
+<p>(<i>A mournful silence follows</i>.
+TOBY <i>curls himself up like
+a turban and closes his
+eyes, because he feels like
+crying. His breath comes
+in little sobs</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>absently, in a low, monotonous
+chant</i>.)</p>
+
+<p>The dog ... the little dog ... the
+bones, the little dog ... the rabbit ...
+the great dane, the rabbit's hole...the
+little dog, the mutton bones...the rabbit's
+skin...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG <i>at first endures
+the torture heroically; then
+his nerves betray him and
+lifting his head he howls&mdash;the
+long plaint of the abandoned
+dog</i>.</p>
+
+<p>Wooo&mdash;oo&mdash;oooooo!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>from the top of the console-table</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Will you be quiet!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Wooooooooo!!--oo&mdash;oooo&mdash;oo!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>aside</i>)</p>
+
+<p>That's it! That's it!</p>
+
+<p>(SHE <i>wakes bewildered, still
+captive of her dreams, while
+the Cat listens patiently to
+the approaching step on the
+stairs, which means liberty
+for him and punishment for</i>
+TOBY-DOG.)</p>
+
+
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/121.gif" width="487" height="453" /></p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<a name="THE_FIRST_FIRE"></a>
+<h2><b>THE FIRST FIRE</b></h2>
+
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/124.gif" width="531" height="345" /></p>
+
+<p><i>Because it is raining and an October wind
+chases wet leaves through the air, She has
+lit the first fire of the season in the great
+chimney-place</i>. KIKI-THE-DEMURE <i>and</i>
+TOBY-DOG, <i>in ecstasy, side by side on a
+corner of the warm hearth-stone, contemplate
+the flame with dazzled eyes and address
+their meditations to it</i>.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>looking very like a cushion;
+no paws visible</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Oh Fire, how splendid you are! You
+have come back more beautiful than my
+memory of you! You are hotter and nearer
+than the sun! The pupils of my eyes contract
+in your light, their lids half close,
+modestly hiding the joy I feel at seeing you
+again, and my inscrutable countenance shows
+but the semblance of a thought painted there
+in fawn color and black.... Your crackling
+drowns the soft sound of my purr. Don't
+snap too much. Be merciful, O inconstant
+Fire! Don't sputter sparks on my fur.
+Allow me to adore you without fear ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>half baked; eyes blood-shot;
+tongue pendant</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Fire! Divine Fire! Here you are again!
+I am still very young, but I remember how
+awe-struck I was the first time Her hand
+woke you in this same chimney-place. The
+sight of a god as mysterious as you are
+was most impressive to a baby-dog just out
+of the maternal stable. Oh Fire, I've not
+quite gotten over my fear! Hiii!... You
+spit at me, something red that smarts ...
+I'm afraid ... Well, it's gone now.</p>
+
+<p>How beautiful you are, Fire! Out from
+your ruddy center shoot tatters and shreds
+of gold, sudden spurts of blue, and smoke
+that twists upwards and draws queer shapes
+of beasts ... Oh, but I'm hot! Gently,
+gently, sovereign Fire, see how my truffle
+of a nose is drying up and cracking, and
+my ears&mdash;are they not ablaze? I adjure
+thee with suppliant paw. I groan ... ah
+ ... I can endure it no longer! ... (<i>He
+turns away</i>.) Nothing is ever perfect. The
+east wind coming under the door nips my
+hind-legs. Well, it can't be helped! I'll
+freeze behind if I must, provided I can adore
+you face to face.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I am a Cat and therefore aware of all
+that you bring in your train, O Fire! I
+foresee winter; its coming both troubles and
+pleases me. I've already begun to thicken
+and embellish my fur-coat in its honor, the
+darker stripes are becoming black, my white
+tippet swells into a dazzling boa, and the fur
+on my belly surpasses in beauty anything
+that has ever been seen. What shall I say
+of my tail, broad as a club, with alternate
+rings of fawn-color and black, or of the sensitive,
+priceless aigrettes which spring from
+my ears? My ear-rings She calls them....
+What cat could resist me! Ah! the January
+nights, the serenades under a frosty
+moon, the dignified wait on the pinnacle
+of a roof, the encounter with a rival cat on
+the narrow top of a wall!... But I feel
+quite sure of my superior strength. I'll
+swish my tail, put back my ears, sniff tragically
+as one does before vomiting, and then lift
+up my voice&mdash;its modulations are infinite.
+I'll make it strong enough to waken all the
+sleeping Two-Paws. I'll vociferate, I'll
+whimper, pacing up and down the garden,
+my body distended, my legs bent outward,
+feigning madness to terrify the tom-cats!</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/127.gif" width="550" height="383" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I know something of the changes and
+pleasures you foretell, Fire&mdash;for I'm a Dog.
+Already, it is raining in the garden. I suppose
+it's raining on the road too, and in
+the woods. The falling drops are not warm,
+as they were in the summer storms when my
+truffle, gray with dust, delighted in the
+damp smell that came from the west. The
+sky is troubled and the wind has grown
+strong enough to blow my ears out straight,
+like little flags. A sharp cry, such as I
+make when I beg, comes under the door.
+You'll be shining here every day, Fire; but
+I'll have to suffer for the right to worship
+you. For She'll continue to wander about,
+her head covered with the pointed hood which
+changes her so, that it frightens me. She'll
+put on wooden shoes too, and carelessly
+crush the puddles, the little heaps of mud,
+and the weeping mosses. I'll follow her,
+since I've promised to do so my life long
+(and also because I can't help it), I'll follow
+her, a forlorn and piteous object, shining
+wet, my belly covered with mud, until,
+through very excess of misery I'll forget,
+and ramble in the coppice, interested in
+every undulation of the grass, eager to revive
+the drowned scents in it.... She'll become
+communicative when she sees me hurrying
+along and we'll talk: &quot;Ha, Toby-Dog,&quot;
+she'll say, &quot;ha! ha! a bird! There on
+the branch! Look! you booby! Now he's
+gone.&quot; She'll condole with me then, until
+I'm on the verge of tears. &quot;Oh, my little
+black boy, my sympathetic cylinder, my
+batrachian love, how cold you are, how wet,
+how sad, how you suffer, oooo!&quot; And before
+I'm able to judge of the sincerity of her
+pity, the tears will overflow, my throat contract,
+and we'll wail in unison....</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/128.gif" width="536" height="227" /></p>
+
+<p>Ah, but what delirious joy when the capricious
+wooden shoes turn again toward the
+house, hurrying to rejoin Him whom we've
+left scratching paper! They don't go half
+fast enough for me then! I jump 'round
+her, barking with delight to see the hill diminishing,
+our climb at an end, to smell the
+good stable smell and that of burning wood
+as we near the house. At last you shine
+forth, O Fire, O Sun, through the misty window
+pane!... I shall hardly have crossed
+the threshold when an overpowering sleepiness
+will dash me to the floor in front of
+you&mdash;you, who will reduce the mud on my
+belly to fine powder and change the water of
+the roads to smoky vapor.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>A delightful glow penetrates my coat to
+the silky down, the impalpable colorless
+threads which protect my delicate skin. I
+feel myself swelling like a cloud. I must
+quite fill the room. My whiskers seem
+charged with electricity&mdash;a sign that I will
+sleep&mdash;but for the time being, the contemplation
+of your splendor and thoughts of the
+coming season keep me awake. It's raining.
+I shall not go out. I'll wait for the sun, or
+the dry wind, or better still, the frost. Ah,
+how the biting cold stimulates me! It lashes
+my lungs with handfuls of needles, and makes
+a <i>bonbon glac&eacute;</i> of my charming nose. The
+rollicking frost-sprite will blow his madness
+into me. She'll laugh and He too,
+leaving his scratching-paper, to see me vie
+with the leaves in bounds, leaps and wild
+whirlings, resembling a floating flurry of
+gray smoke rather than a Cat. To the top
+of a tree! Down again! Then seven turns
+after my tail! A perilous backward leap!
+A vertical jump, with aerial <i>danse du ventre</i>!
+Girations, sneezes, careering from the real
+to the dream, until in terror of myself, I
+come to a sudden stop.... Everything
+turns before my eyes. I'm the center of a
+strange, spinning world ... In my bewilderment
+(half-feigned) I'll make a little moo,
+like a cow, which will bring them both running
+to me,&mdash;She laughing, and He fearing
+something wrong. That will suffice to sober
+me, and with a bold front and noble mien, I'll
+regain this cushion near your altar, O Fire!</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/131.gif" width="473" height="324" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+
+<p>This hearth-stone burns the horny pads of
+my feet. What shall I do? Move away?
+never! I'll toast to death rather than give
+up this redoubtable bliss. Heaven prevent
+Her coming, now! I've reason to fear the lash
+of the whip, and the magic words which mean
+exile: &quot;Toby! that's stupid! I forbid you
+to roast yourself. You'll have sore eyes,
+and catch cold when you go out.&quot; That's
+what She says, while I regard her with a
+stupid look of utter devotion. But She's
+never duped by it. I hear noises upstairs,
+her step coming and going ... I wonder is
+her vagabond fancy wearied at last?
+<img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/133.gif" width="513" height="263" align="left"/>
+This
+morning She whistled to me and in my haste
+to obey her, I rolled to the bottom of the
+stairs&mdash;being low and thick-set, with short
+legs, no nose, and almost no tail to balance
+me. Well, we set off. The last apples were
+rocking to-and-fro on swaying branches.
+My happy voice, a joyful shout from her now
+and then, the vain crowing of the cocks, the
+creaking of wagons on the road&mdash;all these
+sounds floated on a bluish, cottony, suffocating
+fog. She took me far, and many
+marvelous things happened on our way. We
+met terrible giant dogs. My proud bearing
+seemed to exasperate them, but I kept
+them back with a single look (besides, a
+closed iron gate rendered them powerless).
+I chased a rabbit into the thicket, though
+She cried loudly: &quot;I forbid you to touch
+the little animal!&quot; ... My mother certainly
+gave me swift legs but they're short,
+and the white end of the little beast kept far
+ahead. A bush covered with red berries detained
+us a very long time. She sees no objection
+to eating strange things and I can
+truthfully say that I always taste everything
+She offers me, for I've great faith in her.
+But this morning&mdash;&quot;Eat, Toby, nice berries.
+Eat! here are some rose-hips. Oh
+stupid! how can you not dote upon their
+delicious flavor? I assure you these are
+comfits of Mother Nature's making.&quot; In
+deference to her, I chewed a reddish ball;
+there were some rough hairs on it&mdash;put
+there doubtless by her teasing hand&mdash;and
+what was bound to happen, did happen ... Khaha!
+My throat rejected the nasty &quot;rosehip.&quot;...</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/134.gif" width="557" height="156" /></p>
+
+<p>But listen, Fire, what I saw after that,
+passes <i>my</i> understanding. It was in a wood
+where stiff leaves rustled. Had She carried
+you under her cloak, or do gods like
+you come at her bidding? I saw her hands
+pile up the wood, arrange flat stones in some
+mysterious fashion, and then, Fire, I saw
+the sparks flash and your joyous soul palpitate,
+grow big, soar naked and rose-colored,
+veil itself in smoke, snap noisily (for
+yours is a belligerent soul), agonize&mdash;and
+disappear.... The world is full of incomprehensible
+things....</p>
+
+<p>Last of all, on our way back, I discovered
+near the park gate&mdash;saw it before She
+did&mdash;one of those invincible beasts called
+hedge-hogs, the mere sight of which brings
+us dogs to bay. What madness to realize
+that an animal is hiding under that pin-cushion
+and laughing at me, and that I can
+do nothing, <i>nothing</i>! I implored her&mdash;She
+can do nearly everything&mdash;to pluck
+him for me. She began by turning him
+over with a little stick, as if he were a horse
+chestnut. &quot;Astonishing,&quot; said She, &quot;I
+can't find the top of him!&quot; Then She took
+one of his spines between two fingers and
+carried him home that way&mdash;I dancing behind
+her&mdash;and put him in her work basket.
+After a while the horrid beast unrolled himself,
+stuck out a pig-like nose, opened two
+shiny rat's eyes and raised himself, holding
+fast by his little paws, which were exactly
+like a mole's. &quot;How pretty he is,&quot;
+She cried, &quot;a real little black pig.&quot; I
+stood near the table groaning with covetousness,
+but She didn't pluck him for me,
+not then, or ever, and perhaps the cook ate
+him.... This cat's a dissembler. Maybe
+<i>he</i>... But away with care! I'm too excitable!
+I mustn't let myself think of these
+things. Life is beautiful, O Fire, since you
+illumine it ... I'm going to sleep ... Watch
+over my unconscious body ... I'm
+going ... to sleep....</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/135.gif" width="527" height="236" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/137.gif" width="399" height="261" /></p>
+
+<p>One would think me asleep because the
+narrow slit made by my parted eyelids,
+seems but the continuation of that velvety
+line, that bold crayon-stroke, a sort of
+Oriental make-up, uniting my eyelids and my
+ears. But I'm awake, keeping watch like
+a yogi, in a state of blissful ankylosis, conscious
+of all that's going on around me....
+My privileged eyes, Fire, do but behold you
+better when they're closed and I can count
+the various essences you mingle in a sparkling
+bouquet. Here in a flame of mauve-color
+and blue, glows the soul of a branch
+of arbor-vitae. Yesterday it waved a
+plume-like shadow on the garden walk ... To-day,
+with its delicate twigs, it is but a
+writhing skeleton. She cut it with one stroke
+of the pruning scissors. Why? That it
+might breathe out its fervent blue and
+mauve-colored soul? For like me, She delights
+in your dance, Fire, and chastises
+you when you're quiet, with a stern pair of
+tongs. Sitting there with her head bent
+and her arms hanging along her sides, what
+does She read, I wonder, in that fiery rose
+which is the labyrinthian heart of you?...
+She knows a great deal certainly, but not as
+much as a Cat.</p>
+
+<p>That thick tear on the log represents the
+anguish of a very old fir-tree, killed by the
+assiduous ivy. Just a short time ago I saw
+it struck down, lying on the grass, its foliage
+looking like a beautiful head of reddish
+hair. I saw the axe that felled it, too.
+Its trunk weeps tears of resin, which trail
+along in drivel, then change to heavy, creeping
+flame. But the dry red locks break into
+lines of living fire, whistle and shoot innumerable
+jets of many colors underneath a
+broad gold wave that rolls voluptuously....</p>
+
+<!--<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/139.gif" width="416" height="313" /></p>-->
+
+<p>Ah, love ... hunting ... fighting.... It's
+your light, Fire, that discovers these passions
+in the depths of my being. It's time
+the little winged creatures searching withered
+berries came near. I'll have them
+soon! I'll watch, motionless in the brushwood,
+wildly wishing that the earth itself
+might hide me, the muscles of my legs twitching
+with desire to make the spring, my chin
+trembling.... Then, if I don't betray my
+hiding-place by an irrepressible quavering,
+frightening them away in one great commotion
+of wings and rustling branches!...
+But no, I'm master of myself. One bound at
+exactly the right moment and my feeble
+prey is panting under me. Oh, the ridiculous
+effort of a weak animal&mdash;its tiny ineffectual
+claws and pointed wings beating
+against my face! My jaws will open to the
+splitting point and my perfect nose wrinkle
+ferociously, for the joy of holding a living,
+terrified body. I'll know the intoxication of
+battle! I'll prance victoriously, shaking my
+head to torment the bird a little, for it
+faints away too soon between my teeth!
+Terrible to see I'll gallop towards the house,
+singing in a strangled voice, without loosening
+my grip, for He must stop his scratching
+to admire me, and She must give chase with
+distracted cries: &quot;Wicked, savage cat!
+Drop that bird! drop that bird!! Oh, I beg
+of you! It hurts me so....&quot; Ha! She
+never can have hunted....</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/140.gif" width="398" height="172" /></p>
+
+<p>I intend to astonish the world, Fire, during
+Winter's reign. The Cat that lives at
+the farm (She says the farmer's cat,
+while we say the Cat's farmer), the fellow
+that's so badly dressed, disfigured by the
+nose of a weasel, and seems to walk on
+stilts, his legs are so long&mdash;well, he sharpens
+his claws and regards me the while.
+Patience! He's strong, brutal, irresolute,
+and utterly lacks distinction. The slamming
+of a door terrifies him; he puts back
+his ears and flies, panic-stricken. Still, I've
+seen him kill a good-sized hen, without making
+any fuss about it. For a glance of the
+young cat's deceitful eyes, or right of precedence
+on the garden wall, for a word of
+double meaning, for nothing, but the fun
+of the thing&mdash;I'll take my chances with
+him! He'll learn that a mysterious silence
+can demoralize the enemy quite as effectively
+as murderous cries. The low garden wall
+seems to me a convenient place. Let him
+try his hoarse miauling in all possible keys!
+May his unsightly face, and more hideous
+body dislocate itself in a deceitful ataxia
+(for they're still at these old tricks)! I'll
+be proof against it all, and merely flash
+the green magnetism of my magnificent eyes
+upon him. His brows will fall under
+their persistent insult, a shudder will run
+along his spine, he'll do a few steps of
+our ancient war dance&mdash;forward, back, forward
+again. But I'll stand&mdash;motionless
+as the statue of a Cat. The green witchcraft
+of my gaze will strike terror and madness
+into my rival and soon I'll see him
+writhe, utter false cries, and, as a last resource,
+try to balance himself on the nape
+of his neck, like a forked pear tree, only to
+roll over shamefully into the potato field....</p>
+
+<p>All that will come to pass, Fire, exactly
+as I've told it. To-day the future dawns in
+your new flame.... I'm growing drowsy....
+My purr and your crackling are ceasing
+together.... I see you still and already
+I catch glimpses of my dreams.... The
+silky sound of the rain against the window
+is soft as a caress, and the water-pipe on the
+roof sobs low like a pigeon....</p>
+
+<p>Don't go out during my nap, Fire. Remember,
+you're the guardian of my august
+repose&mdash;that delicate death, known as a
+Cat's sleep....</p>
+
+
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/144.gif" width="423" height="499" /></p>
+
+
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<a name="THE_STORM"></a><h2><b>THE STORM</b></h2>
+<br />
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/148.gif" width="636" height="390" /></p>
+
+<p><i>A suffocating summer's day in the country.
+The blinds of the house are half closed.
+Not a sound is heard from within; not a
+murmur from the parched garden, where
+even the sensitive leaves of the mimosa
+hang motionless</i>.</p>
+
+<p>KIKI-THE-DEMURE <i>and</i> TOBY-DOG <i>begin
+to feel uncomfortably conscious of the coming
+storm, which is yet but a slate-blue
+plinth thickly painted at the bottom of the
+dull blue sky-wall.</i></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>restlessly lying first on one
+side, then on the other</i>)</p>
+
+<p>No use! I can't be comfortable. What
+does this heat mean anyway? I must be
+sick. It began at breakfast; I didn't like
+the meat and sniffed disdainfully at my dog-biscuit.
+Something awful is going to happen.
+I haven't done anything wrong that I
+know of&mdash;my conscience is clear&mdash;and yet,
+I'm suffering. There lies my chum, shivering
+and unable to sleep. I know by his quick
+breathing that he feels just as I do.... I
+say, Cat?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>irritably, in a low tone</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Be quiet!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>What? You're listening to some noise?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>No! <i>Heavens</i>, no! Don't mention noise.
+The mere sound of your voice makes the skin
+on my back go in waves like the sea.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG (<i>frightened</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Are you going to die?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I hope not. I've a sick headache. Can't
+you see the arteries throbbing under the almost
+hairless skin of my temples&mdash;the transparent,
+bluish skin that denotes a thoroughbred?
+It's atrocious! The veins on
+my forehead are like writhing vipers, and
+I don't know <i>what</i> gnome forges in my
+brain! Oh, be quiet! Or at least speak so
+low that the coursing of my agitated blood
+may drown the sound of your voice....</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>But it's this very silence that oppresses
+me. I tremble and don't know why. I long
+for the familiar voice of the wind in the
+chimney, the slamming of doors, the whispering
+of the garden, the poplars' ceaseless
+rustle&mdash;it always sounds like a trickling
+spring&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>The uproar will come, soon enough.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Do you think so? I wish He'd scratch
+paper. It's an idle habit but an honored one.
+And see how listless She is, there in her
+wicker chair. Their silence frightens me
+more than anything. She seems asleep, but
+I can see her eyelashes move and the tips of
+her fingers, too. She's forgetting to play
+with the little balls of thread and doesn't
+sing, or whistle. She suffers just as we do....
+Do you think this can be the end of the
+world, Cat?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>No. It's a storm. Heavens! how uncomfortable
+I am! If I could only get out
+of my skin, cast off this fleece which is
+smothering me, fling myself naked as a
+skinned mouse into a fresher atmosphere!
+Oh Dog, you cannot see the sparks that
+make every separate hair on my body
+crackle, but I feel them. Don't come near!
+A blue flame is going to shoot out of me....</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/152.gif" width="580" height="175" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>shuddering</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Things are coming to an awful pass!
+(<i>He drags himself to the porch</i>.) <i>What</i>
+have they done to the out-of-doors? Look!
+the trees are all blue and the grass glistens
+like a sheet of water. What mournful sunlight!
+It shines white on the slate roofs,
+and the little houses over there on the hill
+look like brand new tombstones. A heavy
+odor, like bitter almond, creeps from the
+white bell-shaped blossoms of the daturas,
+and makes me feel sick and faint. Far
+away, some smoke, heavy as the perfume
+of the daturas, goes slowly up in a straight
+line and falls again&mdash;like a broken aigrette....
+But come and see for yourself!</p>
+
+<p>(KIKI-THE-DEMURE <i>walks falteringly
+to the porch</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>My word, <i>you're</i> changed too, Cat! You
+look as if you were starving, your face is
+so drawn. Your fur is plastered down in
+some places and sticking up in others; gives
+you the expression of a weasel that had tumbled
+into oil.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Don't let that worry you! I'll regain my
+dignity&mdash;if ever another day dawns for us.
+To-day, I drag myself around unwashed,
+uncombed, like a woman out of love with love,
+and life....</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>You say such distressing things. I think
+I'll whine and call for help. Perhaps I'd
+better go to Her, and look in her face for
+the comfort you refuse me. But She seems
+asleep now, in that wicker chair, and how can
+I read my fate in her eyes, when their lids
+are down. I'll lick her hand very respectfully
+and ever so lightly! That will wake
+her and oh, may her first caress drive away
+the evil charm!</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He licks the hand hanging
+at the side of the chair</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE, (<i>with a scream</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Heavens! how you frightened me! Was
+there ever such a ninny as this Dog?
+There!...</p>
+
+<p>(SHE <i>administers a smart
+rap on the nose</i>. TOBY'S
+<i>nerves give way and he
+howls loud and long</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE</p>
+
+<p>Quiet! Not a word I say! Out of my
+sight! I don't know what's the matter, but
+I hate you! And that Cat sitting there,
+looking at me, like a bump on a log!...</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/154.gif" width="273" height="293" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>bristling</i>)</p>
+
+<p>If She dares to touch me, I'll devour her!</p>
+
+<p>(<i>Just at this dangerous crisis
+a low rumbling is heard,
+distant and then near.
+Impossible to tell whether
+it comes from the horizon,
+or arises in the house itself.
+All three lose interest in
+the quarrel</i>.</p>
+
+<p>TOBY-DOG <i>and</i> KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+<i>slink away, as if
+responding to a signal,
+and seek shelter, one under
+the bookcase and the
+other under an armchair</i>.
+SHE <i>turns anxiously to
+the leaden-hued garden, and
+the great violet bank of
+cloud, which of a sudden is
+riven by a blinding streak
+of blue fire</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/156a.gif" width="298" height="343" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE,TOBY-DOG, KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>all together</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Oh!</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/156b.gif" width="598" height="217" /></p>
+
+<p>(<i>A sudden crash shakes the
+windows, and instantly a
+great rush of wind envelopes
+the house, with a noise
+as of flapping canvas:&mdash;all
+the garden prostrates
+itself</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE, (<i>in anguish</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Heavens! the apples!</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>invisible</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I'll let them cut my ears into strips
+rather than leave this hiding-place!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>invisible</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I can't help hearing, and it's as if I saw
+everything that's going on. She hastens to
+close the windows. Someone is running on
+the stairs. A&iuml;e! Another awful flame&mdash;and
+everything is falling in! Silence now....
+I wonder are they all dead? I'll look
+through the fringes of the chair, though it's
+risking my life to do so. Ah, hailstones
+making holes in the leaves! Here comes the
+rain, in silvery drops, wide apart, and so
+heavy that the gravel wrinkles up when they
+fall.</p>
+
+<p class="center">SHE, (<i>heart-broken</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I can hear the peaches falling, and the
+green nuts too!</p>
+
+<p>(<i>All three are silent. Rain;
+quivering streaks of lightning;
+hissing in the pine-trees.
+The wind howls. A
+lull</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I'm not quite so afraid as I was. The
+sound of the rain relaxes my tired nerves.
+I seem to feel its streaming warmth on my
+ears and the back of my neck. Now the
+hubbub is further off! I can hear myself
+breathe. The light coming under this bookcase,
+is brighter than it was. What is She
+doing? I daren't go out yet. If only the
+Cat would move! (<i>He sticks out his head,
+like a wary turtle. A flash of lightning
+makes him draw it back again</i>.) Ha! It's
+beginning all over again. Rain by the
+bucketfuls against the window-panes. Something
+in the chimney is trying to imitate that
+far-away rumbling. Everything's falling to
+pieces ... and <i>She</i> gave me a rap on the
+nose!</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/158.gif" width="596" height="182" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Drop by drop, a little brownish river is
+filtering under the loose window-sash. It's
+stretching out and out on the floor, winding
+its way over to me. I'm so hot and
+thirsty, I'd like to lap up some of it.
+My joints ache and my ears are tired of
+standing up like weather-cocks at every
+crash. My jaws are still clenched with
+nervous fear. The seat of this chair is too
+low; it annoys me, rubbing against the fur
+on my back. However, it's some comfort to
+be able to <i>think</i> of such things&mdash;thanks to
+the peace that's descended on the house.
+The rain is falling quietly and the wind has
+gone down, but the memory of the din still
+hums in my ears. What can He be doing?
+The storm distresses him too. Why didn't
+He come forward to calm the raging elements?
+There She is, opening the porch
+door. Isn't it too soon?... No, for the
+hens are cackling like old maids as they hop
+over the puddles. We're going to have fine
+weather. Oh, the adorable smell of wet
+leaves and earth refreshed! It's so new, so
+pure, I seem to breathe for the first time!</p>
+
+<p>(<i>He creeps stealthily to the
+porch</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>suddenly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Um! How good! That smells like a
+walk! Things change so quickly one hasn't
+time to think. She's opened the door?
+Let's run! (<i>He dashes out</i>.) Well! well!
+the garden has got back its own color
+again! A warmish vapor moistens my
+rough-grained nose. I'm filled with the desire
+to jump and run. The grass is reeking,
+shining wet. Horned snails are feeling
+around in the pink gravel with the tips of
+their eyes, and speckled black and white
+slugs embroider the wall with a silver ribbon.
+Oh! what a beautiful green and gold
+beastie running out there in the wet! Shall
+I catch it? Shall I scratch its metallic shell,
+until it breaks with a little crackling sound?
+No. I'd rather stay near Her. She's leaning
+against the door, taking deep breaths
+and smiling quietly to herself. I'm <i>so</i>
+happy! Something inside me feels grateful
+to the whole world. The light is beautiful,
+and I'm quite sure that there'll never, never
+be another storm.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>I shan't wait any longer; I'm going out.
+I'll find dry places between the puddles for
+my dainty paws to step on. An imperceptible
+thrill runs through the streaming
+garden, making the jewels hung all about,
+tremble and sparkle.... The slanting rays
+of the setting sun find their reflection in my
+eyes which are spangled with green and gold.
+Down near the horizon, where the sky is still
+unsettled, a glittering sword leaps up and
+puts to flight the dark, fuming cloud-horses,
+that have been galloping over our heads.
+Now the odor of the daturas rises and perfumes
+all the air, mingled with that of lemon
+leaves, bruised by the hail. The roses are
+crowned with midges. Oh sudden springtime!
+An involuntary smile stretches the
+corners of my mouth. I'm going to play at
+tickling my nostrils with the point of a
+sweet-smelling blade of grass, carefully
+stretching my neck to avoid the falling
+drops. But I want Him to follow and admire
+me. Will He not come out and enjoy
+himself with us?</p>
+
+<p>(<i>A voice is heard humming
+the motif of the</i> Regensbogen:
+<i>sol, si, re, sol, la, si,&mdash;all flats.
+A door opens
+and closes again</i>. HE <i>appears
+under the dripping
+foliage of vines and jasmine,
+framing the veranda,
+and at the same moment, a
+rainbow is seen in the sky</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/163.gif" width="795" height="1035" /></p>
+
+<hr style="width: 65%;" />
+<a name="A_CALLER"></a><h2><b>A CALLER</b></h2>
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/166a.gif" width="343" height="305" align="left" />
+<br clear="all"/>
+
+<p>(<i>A winter's afternoon, in Paris. The studio;
+a fire crackles gently in the tower-shaped
+stove</i>. TOBY-DOG <i>and</i> KIKI-THE-DEMURE,
+<i>one on the floor, the other on his own particular
+cushion, proceed with the minute
+toilet which follows a long siesta. Peace
+reigns</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>My nails grow faster here than in the
+country.</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/166b.gif" width="229" height="335" align="right"/></p>
+<br clear="all" />
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>It's the contrary, with mine.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Really!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>bitterly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Not to be wondered at! She clips them
+for the sake of the hangings ... Well!
+(<i>Magniloquently</i>), what can't be cured must
+be endured.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>What are you going to do to-day?</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Why ... nothing.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>ironically</i>)</p>
+
+<p>For a change I suppose.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Pardon, to <i>avoid</i> change. What is this
+rage for change that takes possession of
+you all? Change means destruction. Only
+that which remains stationary is eternal.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I'm eternal then, these three hours past.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>But you've been out with Her, haven't
+you? You came in like a whirlwind; bells
+rang, clothes were shaken out, you were
+sneezing and laughing and aureoled with icy
+air.... The end of her nose felt so cold
+when She kissed me on the forehead. She
+always kisses me there, just over the dark
+stripes forming the classic M, which She
+assures me stands for miaou and for Minet,
+my name in French.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Yes ... we had a fine run on the banks
+of the fortifications, and then we went into
+a shop.</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>Is that amusing?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Not often. There are a great many
+people crowded together. I'm immediately
+seized with the fear of losing Her, and I
+stick close to her heels, no matter what
+comes. Strange feet push and knock me
+about and step on my paws. I yelp but the
+skirts all around stifle my voice.... When
+we're out of it, we both look as if we'd been
+shipwrecked ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>May the gods preserve <i>me</i> from anything
+of the sort! Here, the moments have glided
+peacefully by. When She's not in this
+house, there's nothing to hinder me; I employ
+the time as my system of hygiene dictates.
+After my breakfast of rosy liver
+and milk, my kittenhood seems to come back
+to me; I'm filled with a foolish gayety.
+I go over to him. He's rumpling big, blackish
+papers and welcomes me with a quiet
+smile; we loll on the same divan, and revel
+in a few idle moments together. Sometimes,
+with imperious paw, I tear the paper He holds
+like a screen between us. It always seems
+to me the most desirable&mdash;the one that
+crackles best. He cries out, and I throw
+myself on my back and wriggle with joy
+in a sort of horizontal dance, He calls
+&quot;the dance of the bayadeer.&quot; Then somehow,
+everything dwindles before my eyes,
+grows dim, and far away; I want to rise and
+go back to my cushion, but dreams already
+separate me from the world ... Ah! blessed
+hour when you and She disappear, when the
+house is at rest and takes a long breath.
+Soon I'm in the depths of a dark, sweet
+sleep; my ears alone keep watch and turn
+like sensitive antennas towards vague sounds
+of doors and bells ...</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/170.gif" width="596" height="225" /></p>
+
+<p>(<i>At this moment someone
+rings</i>. TOBY-DOG <i>and</i> KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+<i>start and
+change their positions. The
+Cat, sitting, encircles himself
+with his fluffy tail.
+The Dog, in a sphinx-like
+attitude, lifts his head
+boldly</i>.)</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/171a.gif" width="270" height="235" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE</p>
+
+<p>What's that?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>A tradesman?</p>
+
+<p><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/171b.gif" width="392" height="233" align="right" /></p>
+<br clear="all" />
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>shrugging his shoulders</i>)</p>
+
+<p>That's not the kitchen bell. Perhaps it's
+caller.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>with a bound</i>)</p>
+
+<p>What luck! They'll have tea and cakes!
+Come on!! Sugar, sugar! Little cakes!
+Little cakes!!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>gloomily</i>)</p>
+
+<p>To see ladies who shriek, and put
+gloved hands on my back&mdash;hands covered
+with dead skin?... ugh!</p>
+
+<p>(<i>Feminine voices are heard&mdash;Hers
+among them&mdash;and
+the clear tinkling of a little
+bell; then the door opens
+and a very diminutive toy
+terrier enters, alone. She's
+black and tan, seems in love
+with herself, and comes
+forward with a mincing
+step</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG, (<i>voice way up in her head</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I'm the darling little dog, so pretty!</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/173.gif" width="179" height="182" /></p>
+
+<p>(TOBY <i>is struck dumb with
+admiration and astonishment</i>.
+KIKI, <i>indignant, has
+jumped on top of the piano
+and remains an unseen and
+hostile spectator</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG, (<i>astonished at not hearing
+the chorus of admiration that everywhere
+greets her, is reciting</i>&mdash;)</p>
+
+<p>I'm the darling little dog, so pretty! I
+weigh only one pound, eleven ounces, my
+collar is of gold, my ears of black satin,
+lined with shiny rubber, my nails are polished
+like the beaks of little birds. (<i>Catching
+sight of</i> TOBY-DOG.) Oh!--someone&mdash;(<i>silence</i>).
+He's rather good-looking.</p>
+
+<p>(<i>They ogle and strut</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>How tiny she is!</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>Sir&mdash;don't come near me.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Why not?</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>I don't know. My mistress knows. She's
+not here. She stayed in the other room.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>How old are you?</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>Eleven months, (<i>reciting</i>) I'm eleven
+months old. At the dog show, my mother
+took first prize for beauty. I weigh only
+one pound eleven ounces and&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>You've said that already. What makes
+you so little?</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/174.gif" width="301" height="291" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>from the piano</i>)</p>
+
+<p>She's ugly, and has an evil odor. Her
+paws are deformed, she can't stand still an
+instant, and this dog takes pains to make
+himself fascinating!</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG, (<i>very coquettish and talkative</i>)</p>
+
+<p>It's my lineage, of course. One can hold
+me in a muff. You've seen my new collar?
+It's gold ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>And what's that hanging from it?</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>My mother's medal, Sir. I always wear
+it. I come from the <i>Palais de Glace</i>, where
+I made quite a hit. Imagine! I wanted
+to bite a gentleman who was speaking to my
+mistress. <i>How</i> they laughed!</p>
+
+<p>(<i>She wriggles and chirps</i>.)</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/175.gif" width="571" height="245" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>aside</i>)</p>
+
+<p>What an odd creature! Is she <i>really</i>
+a dog? (<i>Sniffs</i>.) Yes ... smells of rice
+powder, but it's a dog just the same.
+(<i>Aloud</i>.) Sit down a moment, it makes me
+quite dizzy to see you moving about so.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>Certainly. (<i>She lies down, like a miniature
+greyhound, crossing her fore-paws to
+show the slimness of her toes</i>.) You were
+here all alone?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>looking toward the piano</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Yes, no other dog. Why?</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>There's a strange odor.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>The Cat, doubtless.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>The Cat? What's a Cat? I've never seen
+one. Do they leave you in the room all
+alone?</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/176.gif" width="566" height="193" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>It happens so now and then.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>And you don't bark? <i>I</i> cry as soon as
+I'm left alone. I'm bored, afraid, feel sick,
+and chew up the cushions.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>And then you're whipped.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG, (<i>insulted</i>)</p>
+
+<p>I'm&mdash;what did you say? You're losing
+your senses, I imagine. (<i>Suddenly amiable
+again</i>.) That would be a pity. You have
+lovely eyes.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Haven't I? They show well, don't they?
+They're large, and then they stick out. She
+says I have eyes like a lobster's, and sometimes
+She says &quot;his beautiful seal's eyes,
+his frog-like eyes of gold.&quot;</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>Who's She?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>simple</i>)</p>
+
+<p>She.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>I don't understand all you say, but I
+find you so <i>very</i> sympathetic! What are
+you doing this evening?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Why ... I dine.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>Naturally! I wanted to know whether
+they receive here this evening, or do <i>you</i> go
+out?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>No, I've been out already.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>Driving?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Walking&mdash;of course.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>Why, of course? I hardly stir except
+in a carriage. Show me the underside of
+your paws. Horrors! One would say 'twas
+the stone they sharpen knives on! Look at
+mine. Satin on top, velvet underneath.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I'd like to see you in the country, on the
+cobble-stones.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>I've been there, Sir. I was in the country
+last summer and there weren't any cobble-stones.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/179.gif" width="565" height="202" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Then it wasn't the country. You don't
+know what country means.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG, (<i>vexed</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Indeed I do, Sir! It's fine sand, and velvety
+lawns that are swept every morning;
+it's a reclining chair on the grass, great,
+fresh cushions of cretonne, foamy milk,
+naps in the shade, and charming little red
+apples to play with.</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>shaking his head</i>)</p>
+
+<p>No. It's the road covered with white powder
+that makes the eyelids smart and the
+paws burn, the tough, shriveled, sweet-smelling
+grass, where I scratch my nose and my
+gums; it's the fearful night&mdash;for I'm the
+only one to guard them, He and She. I lie in
+my basket, but the beating of my poor overdriven
+heart keeps me awake. I hear a dog
+crying to me from far off, that the Bad Man
+has passed on the road. Is he coming in my
+direction? Will I be obliged in another
+minute, my eyes bloodshot and tongue dry
+as chalk, to throw myself upon him and devour
+his shadowy face? ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG, (<i>trembling and in ecstasy</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Go on! Go on! Oh! how frightened I
+am! ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>modestly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Don't be afraid&mdash;it has never happened.
+All that is the country, yes, and the interminable
+hill, in the shadow of the carriage,
+when thirst, hunger, heat and fatigue, render
+the soul submissive and hopeless ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG, (<i>quite worked up</i>)</p>
+
+<p>And then?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Oh, nothing. One arrives at the house,
+after all, and the pail of dark water,
+one drinks without taking breath, (&quot;his
+tongue,&quot; She says, &quot;his big tongue is parted
+in the center, like an iris-petal&quot;) while
+sore eyelids and dusty lashes are splashed
+with cooling drops.... The country is all
+that and many things besides....</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/182.gif" width="624" height="379" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>on the piano, musingly</i>)</p>
+
+<p>All that, yes...and the habits of the
+year before that one finds again, molded to
+one's shape, like a cushion marked with the
+imprint of a long sleep...the long nights
+of freedom, when the lone owlet, with his sad
+little laugh, makes his way through the air
+as quietly as I do on the ground, and silvery
+gray rats cling to the vines, eating
+grapes and keeping their eyes on me at the
+same time. It's the sun-cure on the hot
+stone-wall, from which I arise wan and
+shrunken, baked through and through, but
+svelte enough to make the youngest tomcat
+envious. (<i>Coming back to the present
+with a murderous look at</i> THE LITTLE DOG.)
+Death to you, ill-smelling beast, for having
+evoked these by-gone joys! Aren't you
+going to disappear, that I may come down
+from this cold pedestal, where my paws are
+growing numb?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG, (<i>enthusiastically to</i> THE LITTLE DOG)</p>
+
+<p>But let us forget all that! With you
+there, I can think of nothing but you. I feel
+that I love you!</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG, (<i>lowering her eyes</i>)</p>
+
+<p>Do you mean...really?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Of course I do!</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>So soon!</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/184.gif" width="416" height="238" /></p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>We've already wasted a great deal of
+time.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>But ... we've been chatting. I've enjoyed
+it very much ... and I fail to understand
+why the society of young dogs like
+you, is forbidden me ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>Allow me to make love to you.</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>What's that?</p>
+
+<p class="center">TOBY-DOG</p>
+
+<p>I'll show you. First I hold myself very
+erect, stiffen my legs, walk 'round you, barking
+low and melodiously. My tail wriggles,
+my ears ...</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG</p>
+
+<p>Don't come near me. I feel quite upset.
+(<i>Escaping</i>.) A&iuml;e! You unmannerly fellow!</p>
+
+<p class="center">KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (<i>standing up</i>)</p>
+
+<p>These preludes are indeed a sad parody
+on our wild love-making ... (<i>aloud, very
+angry</i>) I should think&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="center">THE LITTLE DOG <i>looks to
+see where the dreadful voice
+is coming from, and espies
+a strange striped monster
+with eyes afire, and eyebrows
+and whiskers bristling
+ferociously. She dashes
+towards the door crying</i>,</p>
+
+<p>Help, help! There's a tiger on the
+piano! ...</p>
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/185.gif" width="651" height="291" /></p>
+
+<p><i>And falls into the arms of her
+mistress, who has come
+upon the scene and proceeds
+to console her with
+great volubility; Fifi! my
+Zezette! My darling! there,
+there, goo, goo, goo, goo,
+you poor helpless little doggie!
+What did they do to
+her? Ooooo!--Ooo! Was
+it the naughty bow-bow?
+etc., etc., etc</i>.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center"><img border="0" alt=" " src="gifs/186.gif" width="632" height="903" /></p>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Barks and Purrs
+by Colette Willy, aka Colette
+Translated by Maire Kelly
+
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@@ -0,0 +1,3360 @@
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Barks and Purrs
+by Colette Willy, aka Colette
+Translated by Maire Kelly
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Barks and Purrs
+
+Author: Colette Willy, aka Colette
+Translated by Maire Kelly
+
+Release Date: March 28, 2004 [EBook #11737]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK BARKS AND PURRS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Hilary Caws-Elwitt and PG Distributed Proofreaders
+
+
+
+
+
+
+BARKS AND PURRS
+
+BY
+
+COLETTE WILLY
+
+
+
+
+TRANSLATED BY
+
+MAIRE KELLY
+
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+PREFACE
+SENTIMENTALITIES
+ON THE TRAIN
+DINNER IS LATE
+SHE IS ILL
+THE FIRST FIRE
+THE STORM
+A CALLER
+
+
+
+
+PREFACE
+
+_Madame_:
+
+_There are moments when one seems to come to life. One looks about and
+distinguishes a creature whose foot-print closely resembles the ace of
+spades. The thing says: bow-wow. It is a dog. One looks again. The ace
+of spades is now an ace of clubs. The thing says: pffffffff--and it is a
+cat._
+
+_This is the history of the visible world and in particular, that of my
+god-children, Toby-Dog and Kiki-the-Demure. They are so natural--I use
+the word in the sense in which it is applicable to the savages of
+Oceania--that all their acts conspire to make of life, a very simple
+proposition. These are animals in the fullest sense of the
+word--animos--if I may employ the original orthography, capable of
+exclaiming with those of Faust_:  "The fool knows it not! He knows not
+the pot, He knows not the kettle."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_And as such, Madame, you have placed them exactly where they should be:
+their earthly Paradise is the apartment of Monsieur Willy. In your
+salon, the probable palm and rubber-plant give the impression of
+luxuriant Edenic flora, relatively speaking, and illustrate the
+transmogrification which is to allow M. Gaston Deschamps--critic of a_
+"Temps" _plus-que-passe--to announce to the wilderness (where he speaks
+familiarly of Chateaubriand), and to the College de France, how well he
+can admire and understand a true poet_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_For you are a true poet and I will declare it freely, not concerning
+myself more with the legends Parisians have the habit of weaving about
+every celebrity. They admire Gauguin and Verlaine, not so much for their
+originality, as for their eccentricities. And so it happens that certain
+persons, unacquainted with the nameless sentiment, the order and purity,
+the thousand interior virtues which guide you, persist in saying that
+you wear your hair short and that Willy is bald._
+
+_Must I then--living at Orthez--tell_ Tout-Paris _who you are, present
+you to all who know you--I who have never seen you_?
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_I will say then, that Madame Colette Willy never had short hair, that
+she does not wear masculine attire; that her cat does not accompany her
+when she goes to a concert, that her friend's dog does not drink from a
+tumbler. It is inexact to say that Mme. Colette Willy works in a
+squirrel's cage, or performs upon trapeze and flying rings, and can
+reach with her toe the nape of her neck. Madame Colette Willy has never
+ceased to be the_ plain woman _par excellence, who rises at dawn to give
+oats to the horse, maize to the chickens, cabbage to the rabbits,
+groundsel to the canaries, snails to the ducks and bran-water to the
+pigs. At eight o'clock, summer and winter, she prepares the cafe au lait
+for her maid--and herself. Scarcely a day passes that she does not
+meditate upon this admirable book_:
+
+A LADY'S COUNTRY-HOUSE
+
+BY
+
+MME. MILLET ROBINET.
+
+_Orchard, kitchen-garden, stable, poultry-yard, bee-hive and hot-house,
+have no further mysteries for Madame Colette Willy. They say, she
+refused to divulge her secret for the destruction of mole-crickets to "a
+great statesman, who prayed her on his knees."_
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_Madame Colette Willy is in no way different from the description I have
+just given of her. I am aware that certain folk, having met her in
+society, insist upon making her very complex. A little more, and they
+would have ascribed to her the tastes of the mustiest symbolists--and
+one knows how far from pleasing are those Muses' robes, how odious the
+yellow bandeaux above faces expressionless as eggs. Robes and bandeaux
+are to-day relegated to drawers in the Capitol at Toulouse, from which
+they will never be taken more, except when occasion calls for the
+howling of official alexandrines in honor of M. Gaston Deschamps,
+Jaures, or Vercingetorix._
+
+_Madame Colette Willy rises to-day on the world of Letters as the
+poetess--at last!--who, with the tip of her slipper sends all the
+painted, laureled, cothurned, lyre-carrying Muses--that, from Monselet
+to Renan, have roused the aspirations of classes in Rhetoric--rolling,
+from the top to the bottom of Parnassus._
+
+_How charming she is thus--presenting her bull-dog and her cat with as
+much assurance as Diana would her hound, or a Bacchante her tiger._
+
+_See her apple-cheeks, her eyes like blue myosotis, her
+lips--poppy-petals, and her ivy-like grace! Tell me if this way of
+leaning against the green barrier of her garden-close, or of lying under
+the murmurous arbor of mid-Summer, is not worth the starched manner,
+that old magistrate de Vigny--with his neckcloth wound three times
+around, and rigid in his trousers' straps--imposed upon his goddesses?
+Madame Colette Willy is a live woman, a real woman, who has dared to be
+natural and who resembles a little village bride far more than a
+perverse woman of letters_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_Read her book and you shall see how accurate are my assertions. It has
+pleased Madame Colette Willy to embody in a couple of delightful
+animals, the aroma of gardens, the freshness of the field, the heat of
+state-roads,--the passions of men.... For through this girlish laughter
+ringing in the forest, I tell you, I hear the sobbing of a well-spring.
+One does not stoop to a poodle or tom-cat, without feeling the heart
+wrung with dumb anguish. One is sensible, in comparing ourselves to
+them, of all that separates and of all that unites us_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_A dog's eyes hold the sorrow of having, since the earliest days of
+creation, licked the whip of his incorrigible persecutor in vain. For
+nothing has mollified man--not the prey brought him by a famishing
+spaniel, nor the humble guilelessness of the shepherd-dog, guarding the
+peace of the shadowy flocks under the stars_.
+
+_A tragic fear shines in the cat's eyes. "What are you going to do to me
+now?" it seems to ask, lying on a rubbish-heap, a prey to mange and
+hunger--and feverishly it waits the new torture that will shatter its
+nervous system_.
+
+_But have no fear ... Madame Colette Willy is very kind. She quickly
+dispels the hereditary dread of Toby-Dog and Kiki-the-Demure. She
+meliorates the race, so that dogs and cats will learn in the end that it
+is less dull to frequent a poet than an unhappy College de France
+candidate--had this candidate proven more copiously still, that the
+author of "Memoires d'Outre-Tombe" had topsyturvily described the
+jawbone of the Crocodile_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_Toby-Dog and Kiki-the-Demure well
+know that their mistress is a lady who
+would do no harm--neither to a piece of
+sugar nor to a mouse; a lady who, for our
+delight, jumps a rope she has woven of
+flower-words which she never bruises, and
+with which she perfumes us; a lady who sings,
+with the voice of a clear French rivulet, that
+wistful tenderness which makes the hearts of
+animals beat so fast_.
+
+FRANCIS JAMMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+
+
+DRAMATIS PERSONAE
+
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, A Maltese cat.
+TOBY-DOG, A French bull-dog.
+HE, }
+SHE,} Master and Mistress (of minor importance).
+
+
+
+SENTIMENTALITIES
+
+ _The sunny porch_. TOBY-DOG _and_ KIKI-THE-DEMURE _sprawl on the hot
+stone-flags, taking their after luncheon nap. The silence of Sunday
+prevails, yet_ TOBY-DOG _is not asleep: the flies and a heavy luncheon
+torment him. Hind-quarters flattened out frog-fashion, he drags himself
+on his belly up to_ KIKI-THE-DEMURE _whose striped body is perfectly
+quiet_.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Are you asleep?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_purrs feebly_)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Are you even alive? You're so flat! You look like the empty skin of a
+cat.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_in faltering tones_)
+
+L-e-t--m-e--a-l-o-n-e....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Not sick, are you?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No.... Let me alone. I'm asleep. I'm not even conscious of my body. What
+torment to live with you! I've eaten, it's two o'clock, let's sleep.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I can't. Something's made a ball in my stomach. It means to go down I
+guess, but very slowly. And then,--these _flies_, these _flies_! The
+eyes start out of my head at the sight of one of them. I'm all jaws,
+bristling with terrible teeth (just hear them snap), yet the infernal
+things escape me. Oh! my ears! Oh! my poor, sensitive, brown belly! My
+feverish nose! There! ... you see?... right on my nose! _What_ shall I
+do? I squint all I can ... two of them now?... No ... only one ... no,
+two!... I toss them up like bits of sugar and it's the empty air I
+snap.... I'm worn out. I detest the sun, and the flies, and
+everything!...
+
+(_He wails_.)
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_sitting up, his eyes pale from the light and
+sleepiness_)
+
+Well, you've succeeded in waking me. That's all you wanted, isn't it? My
+dreams are gone! These flies that you're pursuing--I hardly felt their
+little teasing feet through my thick fur. The merest touch, like a
+caress, now and then thrilled along the silky sloping hairs which clothe
+me.... But then you never act with any discretion. Your vulgar gayety is
+a nuisance, and when sad you howl like a low comedian.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_bitterly)
+
+_ If you woke up just to tell me _that_--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_correcting_)
+
+Of course you'll remember 'twas _you_ woke me.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I was so uncomfortable, I wanted someone to help me, to give me a word
+of encouragement....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+_I_ don't know any digestive words.
+
+(_Pause_.)
+
+Fancy their giving _me_ a bad character when ... Just examine your
+conscience a bit and compare us. Hunger and heat wear you out and drive
+you mad; cold makes your blood curdle....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_vexed_)
+
+Mine is a sensitive nature.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+A demoniacal nature, you mean!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+No, I don't mean that. You--you're a monstrous egoist.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Perhaps.... You and the Two-Paws don't understand what you're pleased to
+call a cat's egoism.... Our instinct of self-preservation, our dignity,
+our modest reserve, our attitude of weary renunciation (which comes of
+the hopelessness of ever being understood by them), they dub, in
+haphazard fashion, egoism. You're not a very discriminating dog, but at
+least you're free from prejudice. Will _you_ understand me better? A cat
+is a guest in the house, not a plaything. Truly these are strange times
+we're living in! The Two-Paws, He and She, have _they_ alone the right
+to be sad or joyful, to lick plates, to scold, or to go about the house
+indulging their capricious humors? I too have _my_ whims, _my_ sorrows,
+_my_ irregular appetite, _my_ hours of reverie when I wish to be
+alone....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_attentive and conscientious_)
+
+I'm listening, but I can hardly follow what you say. It's so
+complicated--a bit over my head, you know. But you astonish me! Are they
+in the habit of hindering you in your changeful moods? You mew, and they
+open the door. You lie on the paper--the sacred paper He's scratching
+on--He moves away, marvelous condescension!--and leaves you his soiled
+page. You meander up and down his scratching table, obviously in quest
+of mischief, your nose wrinkled up, your tail giving quick little jerks
+back and forth like a pendulum. She watches you laughing, while He
+announces "the promenade of devastation." How then, can you accuse
+Them--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_insincere_)
+
+I don't accuse Them. After all, psychological subtleties are not in your
+line.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Don't speak so fast. I need time to understand. It seems to me--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_slyly_)
+
+Pray, don't hurry! Your digestion might suffer in consequence.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_unconscious of the irony_)
+
+You're right! I've some trouble in expressing myself to-day.--Well, here
+goes: it seems to me that of the two of us it's you they make the most
+of, and yet _you_ do all the grumbling.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+A dog's logic, that! The more one gives the more I demand.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+That's wrong. It's indiscreet.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Not at all. I have a right to everything.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+To everything? And I?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I don't imagine you lack anything, do you?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Ah, I don't know. Sometimes in my very happiest moments, I feel like
+crying. My eyes grow dim, my heart seems to choke me. I would like to be
+sure, in such times of anguish, that everybody loves me; that there is
+nowhere in the world a sad dog behind a closed door, that no evil will
+ever come....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_jeering_)
+
+And _then_ what dreadful thing happens?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+You know very well! Inevitably, at that moment She appears, carrying a
+bottle with horrible yellow stuff floating in it--Castor Oil! Wilful and
+unfeeling, she holds me between her strong knees, opens my jaws--
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Close them tighter!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+But I'm afraid of hurting her--and my tongue, horrified, tastes the
+slimy mawkish stuff. I choke and spit, my poor face is convulsed and the
+end of this torture is long in coming.... You've seen me afterwards
+dragging myself around, melancholy, my head hanging, listening to the
+unwholesome glouglou the oil makes in my stomach....
+
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Once when I was little She tried to give _me_ castor oil. I scratched
+and bit her so, she never tried again. Ha! She must have thought she
+held the devil between her knees. I squirmed, blew fire through my
+nostrils, multiplied my twenty claws by a hundred, my teeth by one
+thousand, and finally--disappeared as if by magic.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I wouldn't dare do that. You see, I love her. I love her enough to
+forgive her even the torture of the bath.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_interested_)
+
+You do? Tell me how it feels. It makes me shiver all over, just to see
+her putting you in the water.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Alas.... Listen then, and pity me. Sometimes, when She's come out of her
+tub with nothing on her but her skin, her soft hairless skin that I lick
+respectfully,--She spills out more warm water, throws in a brown brick
+which smells of tar, and calls, "Toby!" That's enough! The soul quits
+my body; my legs shake under me. Something shines on the water--the
+picture of a window all twisted out of shape--it dances about and blinds
+me. She seizes me, poor swooning thing that I am, and plunges me in....
+Ye Gods! From that time on I'm lost.... My one hope is in her. My eyes
+fasten themselves on hers, while a close warmth sticks to me like
+another skin on top of mine.... The brick's all foamy now ... I smell
+tar ... my eyes and nostrils smart ... there are storms in my ears. She
+grows excited, breathes loud and fast, laughs, and scrubs me
+light-heartedly. At last She rescues me, fishing me out by the nape of
+my neck, I paw the air, begging for life; then comes the rough towel and
+the warm coverlet where, exhausted, I relish my convalescence....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_deeply impressed_)
+
+Calm yourself.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Jove! The telling it alone!... But--you old sly-boots--didn't I see her
+one day armed with a sponge standing over _you,_ holding _you_ down on
+the toilet table?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_quite embarrassed, lashing his tail_)
+
+An old story! The long, fluffy hairs on my legs (which give them the
+outline of a Zouave's) had somehow gotten dirty. She insisted upon
+washing me. I persuaded her that I suffered atrociously under the
+sponge....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What a fibber you are! Did She believe you?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+'Um ... at first. It was my own fault tho' when She didn't. Turned over
+on my back, I proffered the candid belly, the terrified and forgiving
+eyes of a lamb about to be sacrificed. I felt a slight coolness, nothing
+more. A fear that my sensibilities might be destroyed, took possession
+of me. My rhythmical wailings increased, then subsided, then went up
+again like the noise of the sea (you know the strength of my voice). I
+imitated the calf, the whipped child, the cat in the night, the wind
+under the door. Little by little I grew enraptured with my own song, so
+that long after She had finished soiling me with cold water I continued
+wailing, my eyes fixed on the ceiling. Then She laughed tactlessly and
+cried out, "You're as untruthful as a woman!"
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_with conviction_)
+
+That _was_ annoying.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I was angry with her the entire afternoon.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh, as to sulking, you do your share! _I_ never can. I forget injuries.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_dryly_)
+
+You lick the hand that chastens you. Oh it's well known!
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_gullible_)
+
+I lick the hand that--yes, that's it exactly.--An awfully pretty
+expression.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Not mine.... Dignity doesn't trouble _you_ any! My word! I'm often
+ashamed for you. You love everybody. You take all sorts of rebuffs
+without even raising your back. You're as pleasant and as banal as a
+public garden.
+
+TOBY-DOG  Don't you believe it, you ill-bred cat! You think you know
+everything and you don't understand simple politeness. Frankly now,
+would you have me snarl at His or Her friends' heels,--well-dressed
+people who know my name (lots of people _I_ don't know know my name) and
+good-naturedly pull my ears?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I hate new faces.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I don't love them either--whatever you say. I love--Her and Him.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+And I, Him--and Her.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh, I guessed _your_ preference long ago. There's a sort of secret
+understanding between you two--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_smiling mysteriously and abandoning himself to his
+reverie_)
+
+An understanding, yes--secret and profound. He rarely speaks but makes a
+noise like a mouse, scratching his paper. It's for Him I've treasured up
+my little heart, my precious cat's heart, and He, without words, has
+given me his. This exchange makes me happy and reserved. Now and then
+with that pretty, wayward, ruling instinct which makes us cats rivals of
+women, I try my power over him. When we are alone, I point my ears
+forward devilishly as a sign that I'm about to spring upon his
+scratching paper. The tap, tap, tap of my paws straight through pens and
+letters and everything scattered about, is addressed to him as well as
+the insistent miauling when I beg for liberty. "Hymn to the Door-Knob,"
+He laughingly calls it, or "The Plaint of the Sequestered Cat." The
+tender contemplation of my inspiring eyes is for him alone; they weigh
+on his bent head, until the look I'm calling searches and meets mine in
+a shock of souls, so foreseen and so sweet, that I must needs close my
+lids to hide the exquisite shyness I feel.
+
+As for Her, she flutters about too much, often jostles me, holds my paws
+together and rocks me in the air, pets me in excited fashion, laughs
+aloud at me, imitates my voice too well--
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_moved with indignation_)
+
+You're very hard to please! I certainly love Him; he's good and pretends
+not to see my faults, so that he won't have to scold, but She's the most
+beautiful thing in the world to me, the dearest and--the most difficult
+to understand. The sound of her step enchants me, her changeful eyes
+dispense happiness--and trouble. She's like Destiny itself, she never
+hesitates. Even torture from her hands--you know how She teases me?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE  Cruelly.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+No, not cruelly, but artfully. I never can tell what's coming next. This
+morning She bent down as if to speak to me, lifted one of my "tiny
+elephant's ears," as She calls them, and sent a sharp cry into it, which
+went to the very back of my brain.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Horrors!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Was it right or wrong? I can't decide even now. It started waves of
+nervousness running madly through me. Then, She has a fancy for making
+me do tricks. Almost every day I must--"Do the Fish, Toby dear." She
+lifts me in her arms and squeezes me until I gasp. My poor dumb mouth
+opens as a carp's does when they're drowning it in air....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+That's _just_ like Her!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Suddenly I find myself free--and still alive, miraculously saved by the
+power of her will. How beautiful life seems to me then! How fondly I
+lick the hand hanging at her side, the hem of her dress!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_contemptuously_)
+
+A pretty thing to do!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+All good and all evil come to me from Her. She is my worst torment and
+my one sure refuge. When I run to her, my heart sick with fear, how soft
+her arms are and how sweet her hair, falling in my face! I'm her
+"black-baby," her "Toby-Dog," her "little bit o' love." She sits on the
+ground to reassure me, making herself little like me--lies down
+altogether and I go wild with delight at the sight of her face under
+mine, thrown back in her fragrant hair. My feelings overflow, I can't
+resist such a chance for a jolly good game. I rummage and fumble about,
+excitedly poking my nose everywhere, till I find the crispy tip of a
+pink ear--Her ear. I nibble it just enough to tickle her--to make her
+cry out: "Stop, Toby! That's awful! Help! Help! This dog's devouring
+me!"
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+H'm! Simple, homely, wholesome joys! ... And then, off you go to make
+friends with the cook.
+
+TOBY-DOG  And you,--with the cat at the farm.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_coldly_)
+
+Enough I pray, that concerns no one but myself ... and the little cat.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+A pretty conquest! It should make you blush--a seven-months-old kitten!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_roused_)
+
+For me she has all the charm of forbidden fruit and no one dare steal
+her from me. She is slim as a bean-pole....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_aside_)
+
+You old rascal!  KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+... and long; poised on long legs she walks with the uncertain step
+common to all young things. She hunts field-mice, shrew-mice--even
+partridge, and this hard work in the fields has toughened her young
+muscles and given a rather gloomy expression to her kitten-face.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+She's ugly.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No, not ugly, but odd-looking. Her muzzle with its very pink nostrils
+strongly resembles that of a goat, her large ears remind one of a
+peasant's coif, her eyes the color of old gold are set slant-wise, and
+their naturally keen expression is varied by an occasional piquant
+squint.
+
+With what a will does she fly me confounding modesty with fear! I pass
+slowly by (one would think me quite uninterested), draped in my splendid
+coat. She's struck by its stripes. Oh, she'll come back, a little
+love-sick kitten, and putting aside all constraint she'll throw herself
+at my feet--like a supple white scarf--
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I've no objection, you know.... I'm comparatively indifferent to all
+that concerns love. Here my time's so completely filled ... physical
+exercise ... my cares of watch-dog, I ... hardly give a thought to the
+bagatelle.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_aside)
+
+Bagatelle!... He indulges in the persiflage of a traveling salesman!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I love--Her and Him devotedly, with a love that lifts me up to them. It
+suffices to occupy my time and heart.
+
+The hour of our siesta is passing, my scornful friend. Do you know, I
+like you in spite of your scorn and you like me, too. Don't turn your
+head away, your peculiar modesty would hide what you call frailty and
+what I call love. Do you think me blind? How often, on coming back to
+the house with Her, have I seen your little triangular face at the
+window, light up and smile at my approach,--the time to open the door
+and you'd already put on your cat's mask--your pretty Japanesy mask,
+with its narrow eyes.... Isn't it so?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_resolved not to hear_)
+
+The hour of the siesta is passing. The cone-shaped shadows of the pear
+trees grow long on the gravel path. We've talked away our sleepiness.
+You've forgotten the flies, your uneasy stomach, and the heat which
+dances in waves on the meadows. The beautiful, sultry day is dying.
+Already there's a breeze bringing perfume from the pines. Their trunks
+are melting into bright tears....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Here She is! She's left her wicker chair, stretched her lovely arms and,
+judging from the movement of her dress, I think we're going to take a
+walk. See her behind the rosebushes? Now, with her nails she breaks a
+leaf from the lemon tree; she's crumpling it up and smelling it. Ah ...
+I belong to Her, soul and body. With my eyes closed I can divine her
+presence.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Yes, I see Her. She is quiet and gentle for the time being. He'll leave
+his paper now to follow her. He'll come out calling, "Where are you?"
+and sit on the bench, tired out. For _him_, I shall rise politely, and
+go "do my nails" along the leg of his trousers. Silent, happy
+companions, we'll listen for the day's departing footsteps. The perfume
+of the lindens will become sickeningly sweet at the same hour that my
+seer's eyes grow big and black and read mysterious Signs in the air....
+Later on a calm fire will be lit down there, behind the pointed
+mountain--a circle of glistening rose-color in the gray-blue of the
+night--a sort of luminous cocoon from which will burst the dazzling edge
+of the moon. She will sail along, cleaving the clouds.... Then, it will
+be time to go to rest. He'll carry me in on his shoulder and I'll sleep
+close to his feet, which are ever mindful of my repose.... Dawn will
+find me shivering but rejuvenated, sitting face to the sun, in a silvery
+halo of incense, offered me by the dew. Thus, I am a perfect picture of
+the god I was in the old, old days.
+
+
+
+
+ON THE TRAIN
+
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, TOBY-DOG, SHE _and_ HE, _have taken their places in a
+first-class compartment. The train rolls along towards distant
+mountains, and the freedom of Summer-time_. TOBY, _on a leash, lifts an
+inquiring nose to the window_. HE _has strewn the carriage with
+newspapers_: KIKI-THE-DEMURE, _silent and invisible in a closed basket,
+is under his immediate protection_. SHE, _leaning back against the dusty
+cushions, dreams of the mountain she loves best and of the low house on
+it, weighted down with jasmine and virginia-creeper_.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+How fast this carriage goes! It can't be our regular coachman. I haven't
+seen the horses, but they smell very bad and make black smoke. Oh,
+Silent Dreamer, look at me and tell me--shall we arrive soon?
+
+(_No response_. TOBY _gets fidgety and blows through his nostrils_.)
+SHE
+
+Hush! Toby, hush!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I've hardly said a word.... Shall we arrive soon?
+
+(_He turns towards his master, who is reading, and puts a discreet paw
+on the edge of his knee_.)
+
+HE
+
+'Sh!...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_resigned_)
+
+Hard luck! No one wants to talk to me. I'm bored and what's more, I
+don't know this carriage well enough. I'm tired out. They woke me very
+early this morning. I amused myself by running all over the house. They
+had hidden the chairs under sheets, wrapped up the lamps, rolled up the
+rugs. Things were white and changed and awful. There was a horrid smell
+of camphor everywhere. My eyes filled with water, I sneezed under the
+chairs and slid on the bare floor in my haste to follow the maids' white
+aprons. They bustled about among trunks with such unwonted zeal, that I
+was sure something exceptional was going to happen. At the last minute
+just as She came in, calling: "Toby's collar and the cat's basket!
+Quick! put the cat in his basket!"--just as she was saying that, my chum
+disappeared. It was indescribable! He, terrible to see, swore by all the
+gods, and struck the floor with his cane, furious because they had
+allowed his Kiki to get away. She called "Kiki!" at first
+supplicatingly, then in threatening tones, and the maids brought empty
+plates, meant to deceive, and yellow paper from the butcher's. I really
+thought my chum had left this world, when suddenly--there he was perched
+on top of the book-case, looking down on us with an expression of
+contempt in his green eyes. She put up her arms: "Kiki _will_ you come
+down immediately! You are going to make us lose the train!" But he
+didn't come down and it made me dizzy--though I was on the ground--to
+see him way up there walking and turning about and miauling shrilly to
+tell us how impossible he found it to obey. He was about frantic and
+kept saying: "Heavens, he's going to fall." But She smiled skeptically,
+went out of the room and came back armed with the whip. The whip said,
+"crack!" twice only; then a miracle happened I think, 'cause the cat
+leaped to the floor, softer and more bouncey than our plaything, the
+ball of wool. _I_ would have broken to pieces falling like that!... He
+has been in this basket ever since.... (TOBY _goes to the basket_.) Ah!
+here's a little peek-hole.... I see his whiskers ... they're like white
+needles. Whew! What eyes! (_He jumps back_.) I'm rather afraid. One
+can't really shut a cat up; he always manages to get out somehow. ... He
+must suffer, poor fellow! Perhaps if I speak kindly to him ... (_he
+calls very politely_) Cat!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_spitting furiously_)
+
+Khhh!...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_jumping back_)
+
+Oh, you said a bad word! You look awful! Have you a pain anywhere?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Go away! I'm a martyr.... Go away I tell you, or I'll blow fire at you!
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_ingenuous_)
+
+But why?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Why!--Because you're free, because I'm in this basket, because the
+basket's in a foul carriage which is shaking me to pieces, and because
+the serenity of those two exasperates me.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Would you like me to look out and tell you what one sees from the
+carriage window?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Everything is equally odious to me.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_having looked out, comes back_)
+
+I haven't seen anything....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_bitterly_)
+
+Thanks just the same.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I mean I haven't seen anything that's easy to describe. Some green
+things which pass right close to us--so close and so fast that they give
+one a slap in the eye. A flat field turning 'round and 'round and over
+there, a little pointed steeple--it's running as fast as the carriage.
+Another field all red with blossoming clover has just given me another
+slap in the eye--a red slap. The earth is sinking in--or else we're
+going up, I'm not sure which. I see way off, _far_ away, some green
+lawns dotted with white daisies--perhaps they're cows.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_with sarcasm_)
+
+Or wafers, for sealing letters--or anything you like.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Aren't you the least little bit amused?  KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_with a
+sinister laugh_)
+
+Ha! Ask of the damned ...
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Of whom?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_more and more melodramatic, but without conviction_)
+
+... of the damned in his vat of boiling oil, if anything amuses him!
+Mine is not physical torment. I suffer imprisonment, humiliation,
+darkness, neglect--
+
+(_The train stops. A conductor on the platform cries "Aw-ll a-bor!!...
+awl aborr!!"_)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_bewildered_)
+
+Someone's crying out! There's an accident!! Let's run!!!
+
+(_He throws himself against the carriage door and scratches madly at
+it_.)  SHE, (_half asleep_)
+
+Toby dear, you're a nuisance!
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_distracted_)
+
+Oh, you inexplicable person! How can you sit there quietly? Don't you
+hear those cries? They're stopping now--the accident has gone away. Wish
+I'd known ...
+
+(_The train starts again_.)
+
+HE, (_throwing down his paper_)
+
+The poor beast is hungry.
+
+SHE, (_now very wide awake_)
+
+You think so? Well, I am too. But Toby is to eat very little.
+
+HE, (_anxiously_)
+
+And Kiki-the-Demure?
+
+SHE, (_peremptorily_)  Kiki sulks, and he hid this morning, so he'll
+have even less than Toby.
+
+HE
+
+He isn't making a sound. Aren't you afraid he's sick?
+
+SHE
+
+No, he's simply vexed.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_as soon as there's question of himself_)
+
+Me-ow!
+
+HE, (_tenderly and eagerly_)
+
+Come my beautiful Kiki, my imprisoned one, come. You shall have cold
+roast-beef and some breast of chicken ...
+
+(_He opens the prison basket and_ KIKI _puts forth his_ _head, flattened
+on top like that of a serpent; then his long, striped body, cautiously,
+and so very slowly that one begins to think it's coming out by the
+yard_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_pleasantly)
+
+Ah, there you are, cat! Well, now, proclaim your freedom!
+
+(KIKI, _without replying, smoothes his ruffled fur_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Proclaim your freedom I tell you! It's the custom. Whenever a door is
+opened one must run, jump, twist oneself into half circles and cry out.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+_One_? Who's one, pray?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+We dogs.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_seated and very dignified_)
+
+Would you have me _bark_, too?... We have never followed the same rules
+of conduct, that I know of.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_vexed_)
+
+Oh very well, I don't insist. How do you like this carriage?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_sniffing fastidiously_)
+
+It's frightful.--However, the cushions are rather good for one's nails.
+
+(_He suits the action to the word_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_aside_)
+
+Now if _I_ did that ...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_continuing to scratch the upholstery_)
+
+Hon! May this spongy, gray cloth soothe my rage!... Since morning, the
+whole universe has been in a state of monstrous revolt. He whom I love,
+and who venerates me, made not the least effort to defend me. I've
+submitted to humiliating contacts, been jolted to death, piercing
+whistles have shot through my head from ear to ear. Ho, ho, how good it
+is to relax the nerves and to imagine that, with gleeful claws, one
+tears the enemies' flesh in bloody shreds! Ho, ho! S-c-r-a-t-c-h, and
+lift the paws on high! Lift them high as possible! It's a supremely
+insolent gesture....
+
+SHE
+
+I say, Kiki, when are you going to stop that?
+
+HE, (_Indulgent and admiring_)
+
+Let him alone. He's doing his nails.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+He has spoken for me. I forgive him. But since it's allowed, I don't
+care any more about tearing the cushions ... When will I get out of
+this? Not that I'm afraid; they are both there, and the dog too, with
+their everyday faces ... I've twinges in my stomach.
+
+(_He yawns. The train stops. A conductor on the platform cries, "Aw-ll
+a-bor! Aw-ll a-b-o-r-r!!"_)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_excited_)
+
+Screaming again! Another accident?!--Let's run!...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Heavens, what a tiresome dog! What does it matter to him, if there _is_
+an accident?
+
+I don't believe in it moreover. It's the cry of a man, and men cry out
+for the pleasure of hearing their own voices.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_calm again_)
+
+I'm hungry. Can't we hope to eat soon, my mistress? I don't know what
+time it is in this strange country, but it seems to me....
+
+SHE
+
+Come now, we'll all have our luncheon.
+
+(_She takes the things out of the basket, crumples up some tissue paper
+and breaks a crisp brown roll_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_chewing_)
+
+What She gave me then must have been very good indeed to seem such a
+tiny bit. It melted in my mouth, there's not even the memory of it
+left....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_chewing_)
+
+Breast of chicken! Purr-rr ... Goodness me! I was purring without
+knowing it! That won't do. They'll think me resigned to this journey. I
+must eat slowly, grim, and undeceived, eat for the sole purpose of
+keeping myself alive ...
+
+SHE, (_to the dog and cat_)
+
+Allow me to have _my_ luncheon now, if you please. _I_ too, like cold
+chicken and the hearts of lettuce, dipped in salt....
+
+HE, (_anxiously_)
+
+What _shall_ we do to make this cat go into his basket again?
+
+SHE
+
+I don't know. We'll see presently ...
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Finished already? I could swallow three times that much. I say Cat,
+you're eating rather well for a martyr.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_fibbing_)
+
+Trouble digs a hole in one's interior. Move away please, I want to sleep
+now ... if I can. Perhaps a merciful dream will take me back to the
+house I've left, to the flowered cushion He gave me.... Home! sweet
+home! Rugs of bright colors for the delight of my eyes, a palm with
+nice shoots for me to eat, deep arm-chairs, under which I hide my woolen
+ball as a future surprise for myself--ah, and the cork hanging by a
+string to the door-latch! the tables covered with bibelots! I thread my
+way in and out among them and occasionally it amuses me to break some
+brittle thing. The dining-room is a temple! The vestibule, full of
+mystery; there unseen, I can watch those who come and go ... Oh narrow
+back-stairway, where the step of the milkman rings out for me like a
+morning angelus--farewell! farewell! my destiny carries me on, and who
+knows if ever ... But this is _too_ sad! All the pretty things I've been
+saying have really begun to make me feel badly!!
+
+(_He begins a minute and mournful toilet. The train stops. A conductor
+on the platform cries, "Aw-ll-a-borr-a-borr!!"_)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+There it is again! An acci--Oh bother, I've had enough of that!
+
+HE, (_anxiously_)
+
+We're going to change trains in ten minutes. How about the cat? He'll
+never allow us to shut him up ...
+
+SHE
+
+We'll see ... Suppose we put some meat in his basket?
+
+HE
+
+Or perhaps petting would ...
+
+(_They approach the redoubtable_ KIKI _and both speak together_.)
+
+HE
+
+Kiki, my beautiful Kiki, come jump on my knee, or on my shoulder. You
+like that as a rule. You'll doze there and then I'll put you gently into
+the basket. After all, it's open-work and has a comfortable cushion to
+protect you from the rough wicker. Come, my dear....
+
+SHE
+
+Listen, Kiki. You must learn to act properly and to take life as it is.
+You can't stay there like that. We're going to change trains and a
+horrible guard will appear and say insulting things of you and your
+race. Besides you'd better obey, because if you don't, I--I'll give you
+a good whipping.
+
+(_But before she can lift her hand against his sacred fur, Kiki gets up,
+stretches himself, arches his back, yawns,--to show the rosy lining of
+his mouth, and then walks to the open basket where he lies down with an
+admirable air of quiet insolence. He and She exchange eloquent
+glances_.)
+
+
+
+
+DINNER IS LATE
+
+
+_A parlor, in the country, at the close of a long summer's day_.
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE _and_ TOBY-DOG _doze; ears twitching and eyelids
+obstinately shut. Now_ KIKI'S _lids part in a narrow slit, and disclose
+eyes the color of purple grapes. He yawns, with the ferocious
+expression of a small dragon._
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_haughtily_)
+
+You're snoring!
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_who was not really asleep_)
+
+I'm not; it's you.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Impossible! I don't snore, I purr.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Same thing.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_not condescending to a discussion_)
+
+Thank heaven, it isn't! (_A silence_.)
+
+I'm hungry. One doesn't hear the noise of plates in the next room. Isn't
+it dinner time?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_gets up, slowly stretches his forepaws and yawns, darting
+forth a heraldic tongue with curly end_) I don't know ... I'm hungry.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Where is She? How is it you're not at her heels?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_embarrassed, nibbling his nails_)
+
+She's in the garden I believe, picking up plums.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Those yellow balls that rain about one's ears? I know them. You've seen
+her then? I bet She scolded you ... What have you been doing now?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_self-conscious, turning away his wrinkled, toad-like face_)
+
+She told me to return to the house because--because I too, was eating
+plums.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+She did well! You have depraved tastes--the tastes of men.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_offended_)
+
+Say--no one ever sees me eating bad fish! And never, _never_ will I
+understand how you can go into such fits over a dead frog, or that herb.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Valerian.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+That's it, I guess ... An herb--is medicine, isn't it?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Medicine, indeed! Valerian ... but no _you_, can't understand ... I've
+seen Her laugh and go on, as I do over the valerian, after having
+emptied a glass of fetid wine that jumped dangerously too. As for the
+dead frog--so dead that it seems a bit of dry russia leather in the form
+of a frog--it's a sachet, impregnated with rare musk, with which I wish
+to scent my fur.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh, you talk very well--but She always scolds and says that you smell
+bad after it, and He says the same thing.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+They're nothing but Two-Paws, both of them. You, poor thing, belittle
+yourself by seeking to imitate them. You stand on your hind legs, wear a
+coat when it rains, eat plums--for shame!--and those big green balls,
+the malicious trees let fall sometimes, when I'm passing underneath.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Apples?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Very likely. She picks one up and throws it down the path, crying:
+"Apple, Toby, apple," and you rush after, in unseemly fashion, gasping
+for breath, looking like a fool, your tongue and your eyes sticking
+out....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_scowling, head resting on his paws_)
+
+One takes one's pleasures where one finds them.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_yawning, shows his pointed teeth and his palate of
+pink velvet_)
+
+I'm hungry. Dinner is surely late tonight. Suppose you look for Her?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I daren't. She forbade it. She is down there in the hollow, with a big
+basket. The dew is falling and wetting her feet and the sun's going
+away. But you know how She is. She sits on the damp ground, looking
+ahead of her, as if She were asleep--or lies flat on her stomach,
+whistling and watching an ant in the grass ... She tears up a handful of
+wild thyme and smells it, or calls the tomtits and the jays--who never
+come to her by any chance. She takes a heavy watering pot and--ugh! it
+gives me the shivers--pours thousands of icy, silvery threads over the
+roses or into the hollows of those little stone troughs, 'way back in
+the woods. I always look in to see the head of a brindle-bull who comes
+to meet me and to drink up the pictures of the leaves, but She pulls me
+back by the collar with: "Toby, Toby, _that_ water is for the birds."
+... Then She takes out her knife and opens nuts, fifty, a _hundred_
+nuts, and forgets the time ... There's no end to the things She does.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_slyly_)
+
+And what do you do all that time?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I--well--I just wait for her.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I admire you!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Once in a while, squatting down, She eagerly scratches the earth, toils
+and sweats over it; then I jump 'round her, delighted to see her at
+something so useful and so familiar. But her feeble scent deceives her.
+_I_ never smell mole, or shrew-mouse-of-the-rosy-paws, in the holes
+_She_ digs. And how explain her utter lack of purpose? Presently,
+falling back on her haunches, She brandishes a hairy-rooted herb and
+cries: "I have it, the jade!" I lie in the damp grass and tremble, or
+dig my nose (She calls it my snout) into the earth to get the
+complicated odors of it. ... When there are three or four scents all
+blended, all mixed together, can you distinguish that of the mole from
+that of the hare which passed quickly, or the bird which rested there?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Certainly I can. My nose is highly educated. It's small, regular, wide
+between my eyes, delicate at the chamois-skin end of my nostrils; the
+lightest touch of a blade of grass, the shadow of smoke tickles and
+makes it sneeze. It doesn't bother about distinguishing the scent of
+moles from that of--hares, did you say? But it delights in the trace
+left by a cat in a hedge ... I've a charming nose. She calls it, "his
+pretty little nose of cotton velvet." Since my eyes opened on this world
+I've not known the day that someone has not uttered a truthful flattery
+on the subject of my nose. Now yours--is a rough-grained truffle. What
+makes you move it so ridiculously? At this very moment.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'm hungry and I don't hear the plates.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+... your truffle of a nose works up and down and makes another wrinkle
+in your irregular mug.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+She always says, "his square muzzle, his wrinkled truffle," so tenderly
+and so lovingly!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+... And you think of nothing but eating.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+It's _your_ empty stomach that scolds and complains and wants to quarrel
+with me.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I've a charming stomach.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+But no, it's your nose that's charming. You just said so.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+My stomach too. There's none more fastidious, more whimsical, stronger
+and at the same time more delicate. It digests the bones of sole, but
+meat that's the least bit tainted literally turns it.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Literally's the word. You have _active_ indigestion.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Yes, the whole house is affected by it. From the very first qualms I'm
+in terrible distress; the earth gives way under me, my eyes dilate, I
+hurriedly swallow quantities of salty saliva; involuntary, ventriloquial
+cries escape me, my sides bulge out--
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_disgusted_)
+
+I say, if it's all the same to you, tell me the rest after dinner.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I'm hungry. Where can He be?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+He's there, in his study, scratching paper.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+He's always doing that. It's a game. Two-Paws play at the same thing for
+hours and hours. I've often tried to scratch paper gently, as He does,
+but the pleasure doesn't last long. I prefer newspapers torn into shreds
+that rustle and fly ... There is a little pot of dark-violet, muddy
+water on his table. I never sniff it without horror, since the day a
+rather foolish curiosity made me dip my paw into it. This very paw, so
+strong and aristocratic, (the tufts of useless hair you see between my
+toes proclaim the purity of my race) this very paw bore a bluish stain
+for eight days and the degrading odor of rusty steel clung to it a long
+time after ...
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What's the little pot for?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+He drinks from it doubtless.
+
+(_Silence_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+She's not back yet! Heaven grant She isn't lost, as I was one day in the
+streets of Paris!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I'm hungry!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'm hungry! What are we going to eat this evening?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I saw a chicken. It made a silly noise and dropped red blood on the
+kitchen floor, soiling it far more than I ever did, or you either--yet
+no one whipped it. But Emily put it in the fire, to teach it a lesson. I
+licked up some of the blood ...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_yawns_)
+
+Chicken ... it makes my mouth water. She'll say: "Here Toby, bones!" and
+throw me the carcass.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+How badly you speak! He says: "Little chicken bones, Kiki, little
+chicken bones!"
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_surprised_)
+
+But no _really_ it's, "Here, Toby, bones!" that She says.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+He speaks better than She does.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_incompetent_)
+
+Ah?... Tell me, do birds taste anything like chicken?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_whose eyes light up suddenly_)
+
+No ... they're far better, they're alive. Ha, the quivering bird, the
+warm feathers, the delicious little brain ... you feel it all crackling
+between your teeth!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh, you make me sick! It always worries me to see tiny animals like that
+flutter about ... and birds are dear, good little things.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_dryly_)
+
+Don't you believe it, they're only good to eat. They're noisy, stupid
+creatures, infatuated with themselves, _made_ to be eaten. ... You know
+the two jays?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Not very well.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE They live in the little wood. When I walk by they laugh
+a sardonic "tiac, tiac," because I wear a bell at my neck. In vain do I
+hold my head very stiffly and put my paws down _very_ gently, my bell
+tinkles and the two creatures scream from the top of the fir-tree. Just
+let me get hold of them, one of these days!...
+
+(_He lays back his ears and raises the hair along his back_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_pensive_) Positively, Cat, there are times when I don't know
+you. We are talking quietly and suddenly you bristle like a
+bottle-brush; or we happen to be playing amicably together and I bark
+behind your back--bow, wow-wow!--just for fun; then,--one doesn't know
+why, perhaps because my nose has grazed the long hairs on your legs
+you're so proud of--you become all at once a savage beast, spitting
+fire, and charging at me like a strange dog. Don't you think that shows
+a bad character?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_mysterious, eyes half-closed_)
+
+Not at all. It's character, simply. A Cat's character. In such moments
+of irritability, I'm keenly alive to the humiliation of my present
+state, and that of my race.
+
+I can remember a time when priests in long, linen tunics, bending low,
+spoke to us and humbly tried to comprehend our chanted utterance. Know,
+dog, that it is not _we_ who have changed! It may be, there are days
+when I'm more myself, when everything offends me, and justly; a brusque
+gesture, a vulgar laugh, the banging of a door, your odor, your
+inconceivable impudence when you touch me, or encircle me, jumping and
+yelping ...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_patiently, to himself_)
+
+He's having one of his attacks.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_with a start_)
+
+Did you hear?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Yes, the kitchen door, and the door into the dining-room ... and now the
+drawer where the spoons are kept. At last! At last! aaah! (_He yawns_.)
+I can't stand this any longer. _Where_ is She? I don't hear the gravel
+creaking ... night's coming on!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_ironically_)
+
+Go find her.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+And how about Him? He usually worries, and comes in asking, "Where is
+She?" But He's scratching still. He must have drunk up all the
+violet-colored water in the muddy little pot by this time. (TOBY
+_carefully stretches his legs_.) Ah! I feel lively ... and empty. We're
+going to eat soon! Just smell the good kitchen-smells that come under
+the door!... Let's play!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Run, I'll chase, without touching you.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Why not?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I don't want to.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh! but you're tiresome! Watch me jump and arch my neck like a little
+horse and try to catch my stubby tail. Now I turn 'round and
+'round--and--heavens! the whole room spins!--It's--st--opping--now.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Insufferable creature!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Insufferable yourself! Look out, I'm going to run at you as She does,
+when She's merry, crying "Ha, cat!"
+
+(KIKI-THE-DEMURE, _without rising, puts up a paw bristling with claws
+and spotted underneath with rose color and black; it looks like a thorny
+flower_.)
+
+If you dare!...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_in a frenzy_)  I do dare! Bow-wow-wow! Ha, cat! ha, cat!
+
+(KIKI-THE-DEMURE, _exasperated, gives a spring and hangs on the
+table-cloth, slowly dragging it down. A lamp and various things fall to
+the ground. Terrified silence. The two animals, crouching under an
+arm-chair, await punishment_.)
+
+HE _appears at the study door, holding a pen, like a bit, between his
+teeth_.
+
+Thunder and blitzen! What is it now? This cursed menagerie has
+overturned everything! Where's your Mistress? What a place this is to be
+sure! Dinner never on time!... (etc., etc., etc....)
+
+(_The two guilty ones, who well know the harmlessness of such outbursts,
+laugh quietly to themselves and lying flat as bed-room slippers, look at
+one another through the fringes of the chair. The garden gate opens_.
+
+SHE _comes in carrying a basket, full of fragrant plums; her hands are
+sticky from their sugariness, her hair tumbled_. SHE _stands horrified,
+before the disaster_.)
+
+SHE
+
+Oh! They've been fighting again, have they? (_Without conviction_.) Dear
+_me,_ what nasty creatures! I'll give them away! I'll sell them!!--I'll
+_kill_ them!!! (_But the cat and dog, groveling in exaggerated humility,
+crawl up to her, and speak together_.)
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Purr-rr-rr!...There you are!...It's very late ...Toby attacked me; it's
+he who's broken everything. I believe he went mad from hunger.... You
+smell good, of grass and the twilight. You sat down on some wild thyme.
+Come!...Tell your Master to carry me on his shoulder--the meat will be
+overdone, I'm afraid. You'll carve the chicken very quickly, won't you,
+and you'll keep the browned skin for me? If you wish I'll stretch out my
+paw like a spoon, which knows how to take up the littlest morsels, and
+carry them to my mouth with that human gesture that makes you laugh
+so--you and He.... Come!
+
+TOBY-DOG  Hiii ... hiii ... there you are at last! I'm so unhappy when
+you're away. You banished me ... you didn't love me ... The lamp fell
+down all by itself ... Come! I'm awfully hungry, but I'll gladly go
+without dinner, if you'll promise to take me with you always wherever
+you go ... yes, even out in the twilight, though it makes me sad, I'll
+willingly follow you there ... my nose close, close to the hem of your
+dress....
+
+SHE, (_disarmed and quite indifferent to the cataclysm_)
+
+Do look how pretty they are!
+
+
+
+
+SHE IS ILL
+
+ _A bed-room in the country-house; autumnal sunshine filters in through
+closed blinds_. SHE _lies on a couch, apparently asleep, dressed in a
+white woolen gown_. KIKI-THE-DEMURE _makes his toilet on a narrow
+console-table_. TOBY-DOG, _on the carpet, in a sphinx-like attitude,
+watches_ HER _and at the same time, is attentive to the words of his
+master, who is leaving the room on tip-toe._
+
+HE, (_in a very low voice to the two animals_)
+
+Sh! Don't wake her. Be good. I'm going downstairs, to write.
+
+(_He closes the door noiselessly after him_.)  TOBY-DOG, (_to_
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE)
+
+What did He say?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I don't know. Something vague. Directions, like: stay there, good-by.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+He said, "'Sh!" _I'm_ not making any noise.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_ironically_)
+
+They're astonishing! They say "no noise," and thereupon walk off with a
+step a deaf rat could hear two miles away.
+
+TOBY-DOG  Some truth in that. (_He looks at the sleeping figure on the
+couch_.) Her face still looks very small. She's asleep. If you jump down
+from that table don't land with a big thump.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_stiffly_)
+
+Ah, you're teaching me to jump now, are you? Oh, worthy counselor!
+(_quoting_) Put a beggar in your barn and he'll make himself your heir.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What's that?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Nothing. An Oriental proverb. If I wished, dog, to disturb the silence
+of this room I'd be clever enough to choose a rickety chair; its feet
+would pound out a regular tic-toc, tic-toc, tic-toc, in time with my
+tongue as I washed myself. It's a means I've invented to gain my
+liberty. Tic-toc, tic-toc, says the chair. She happens to be reading or
+writing, is easily irritated, and cries, "Be quiet, Kiki!" But I go on
+unconscious of any wrong-doing; tic-toc, tic-toc. She jumps up
+distracted and opens the door wide for me: slowly, like one exiled, I
+cross its threshold and once outside, laugh to find myself so superior
+to them all.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_who hasn't been listening, yawns_)
+
+What a sad week, eh? I don't know what it is to take a walk any more. I
+haven't taken any pleasure in eating either, since She fell from her
+horse.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Heavens, one can love people and care for one's stomach too.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_with ardor_)
+
+Not I! When She screamed and fell from her horse, I felt the heart
+crack inside me.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+That affair couldn't have ended otherwise. One doesn't go climbing up on
+a horse! People don't do such things! I see nothing but extravagance
+around me. To begin with, a horse is a fearful monstrosity.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_indignantly_)
+
+Did one ever hear the like!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_peremptorily_)
+
+I happen to have had the opportunity of making a very close study of
+one....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_aside_)
+
+He makes me laugh!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+... It was the farmer's horse that grazed in the meadow. My life, for a
+whole month, was embittered by that roving mountain. Lying under the
+hedge, I could see his heavy feet disfiguring the ground. I breathed
+his vulgar odor and heard his strident cry shaking the air. Once when he
+was eating the lower twigs of the hedge, I saw myself--the whole of
+me--reflected in one of his eyes! I fled ... and from that day my hatred
+was so strong that I wildly hoped to annihilate the monster. I'll go up
+to him, thought I, I'll plant myself firmly in front of him, and the
+desire of his death will be so strong in my eyes, that perhaps, he'll
+die when he meets my look ...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_diverted_)
+
+And then?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_continuing_)
+
+I carried out my plan. But the horse I had waited for in fear and
+trembling, just blew through his nostrils a long jet of foul-smelling
+vapor, and _I_ fell back in atrocious convulsions.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_Inwardly writhing with laughter_)
+
+You don't exaggerate?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_serious_)
+
+Never! And She must needs go climbing on a horse's back, holding fast to
+four cords, one leg this side and the other that. ... Strange
+aberration!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+We don't think alike, Cat. For me, the horse is, after man, the most
+beautiful thing in the world.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_vexed_)  And where do I come in?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_evasive and courteous_)
+
+Oh, you're a _Cat_. But a horse, and with Her on his back! What a
+beautiful picture they make, high up in the blue air! To gaze on it, I
+have to throw my head 'way back on my thick neck. The horse lends her
+his speed. Now at last, She can race with me when I go off on a mad run.
+Sometimes I'm ahead, ears floating back and tongue hanging out like a
+little flag--the angular shadow of the horse on the road in front. If I
+follow her, a fragrant dust blows back at me. It smells of warm leather,
+moist beast, and a little of her own perfume too. The road runs under
+me, like a ribbon that someone is pulling. Oh, what joy it is to be so
+little and so swift, running along in the shadow of a great galloping
+horse! When we halt, I pant like a motor, between the legs of my friend,
+who snorts and in the kindliest way puts down his fettered mouth and
+sprinkles me ...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I know, I know! The horse "with long mane ashake; hoofs, heavy with
+tumult; eyes, glimmering white." ...You are the last of the
+Romanticists.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'm not the last of the Romanticists. I'm a little bull-dog that came
+into the world one evening, almost under the feet of a chestnut mare.
+She didn't lie down all night long, she was so afraid of crushing my
+mother and her puppies. A little bull-dog like me is almost the child of
+a horse. I lay in the warm straw against her warm flanks, I drank out of
+the stable pails. I used to get up when I heard the sound of hoofs
+coming in and I took an interest in the washing of the carriages, until
+the day She came and picked me out--_me_, the best-looking, the most
+snub-nosed, the stockiest of the litter. (_Sighing_.) And there She
+lies, so dreadfully quiet! It makes me sad to see her with that little
+cloth still 'round her ankle. You remember when He picked her up in his
+arms? He held her--and She's a lot bigger than I am--just as if She were
+a little dog that he was going to drown....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_bitterly_)
+
+I remember. I was at the top of the stairs irritated by the noise, but
+curious. He came up and pushed me aside with his foot, as he would have
+done if a piece of furniture had happened to be in his way.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Is that why you stayed away from this room--her room--for three whole
+days?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_hesitating_)
+
+Yes ... and for another reason too.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What reason?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Because of the fever.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_carried away by his love_)
+
+Her fever smells better than other peoples' good health!
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_shrugging his shoulders_)
+
+And they talk of a dog's scent! Truly the convictions of Two-Paws are
+based upon childish fables. You know of course that fever--
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_in a low tone_)
+
+Makes one afraid, yes.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_in a low tone_)
+
+Makes one afraid, gives one cold shivers down one's back, distaste for
+everything and uneasiness all over. One hesitates on the threshold of a
+room where there is fever, searching fearfully some hidden thing.... She
+was in bed and burning hot. I looked at her a long time, ready to run,
+saying to myself: "Who can be with her there--behind the curtains--who
+is it stifles and torments her and makes her moan in her sleep?"
+TOBY-DOG, (_frightened retrospectively_)
+
+There wasn't anyone, was there?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No one but He--and the fever. He, the most intelligent of Two-Paws, was
+leaning over her listening to her breathing, dimly aware of an invisible
+presence. I overcame my aversion and looked at her. I was melancholy and
+jealous. He must love her, thought I, to go so near and defend her, to
+kiss her, imbued as She is with the evil charm. Would He hold me to his
+heart, if I--
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_imperatively_)
+
+'Sh!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+What?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+She stirred.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_alert, looking at her_)
+
+No ... She didn't stir, but her thoughts did. I felt them. Continue.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_who has recovered his equanimity_)
+
+I don't know now what we were talking about.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+The fev--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_quickly_)
+
+Enough. Don't recall it. Fever is the beginning of the thing one never
+speaks of.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_shivering_)
+
+Yes, I know.... I don't like an animal that can't move. You know what I
+mean ...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_laughing cruelly_)
+
+Nor do I. I can only eat live birds, and as for the tiny mice, I prefer
+to swallow them, squeak and all....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Why does it amuse you to horrify me? You've a certain vanity that I
+can't understand. It consists in exaggerating cruelties that are already
+real enough. You call me the last of the Romanticists, aren't you the
+first of the Sadics?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Oh dog, poisoned with literature! An eternal misunderstanding separates
+us. "I'm a little bull-dog," you replied just now, with that stupid
+sincerity which disarms me. Let me say to you in my turn, "I am a Cat."
+The name is sufficient dispensation. There is in me a hatred of pain and
+ugliness, an overmastering detestation of all that offends my sight, or
+my reason. When the concierge's cat dragged around his wounded paw, I
+threw myself upon him, fired by a righteous anger, and until he stopped
+his whining I--
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_supplicatingly_)
+
+Don't tell me!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_getting angry_)  Understand then, once and for
+all--if the pale recital of what I did upsets you--that I wished to
+abolish, to annihilate in that bleeding animal the suggestion of my own
+inevitable death ...
+
+(_They are quiet for a little while_.)
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_shuddering_)
+
+This confinement does us no good. I would gladly go out into the soft
+sunshine and do "the bayadeer's dance," as He calls it, on the dry
+gravel among the leaves, which look like fried potatoes. Everything is
+yellow out-of-doors. My green eyes would reflect the golden sun and the
+flaming woods and so turn yellow too.... Now I'll think only of what is
+joyous and yellow, the beautiful, cold Autumn, the rosy dawn that leaves
+its colors in the foliage of the cherry-tree ... Come, let's prove the
+strength of our legs and enjoy to the full the consciousness that youth
+has only just begun for us ... Who knows, death may never come ...
+
+(_He jumps down from the console-table, without making the least
+noise_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_stopping him_)
+
+What are you going to do?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Scratch at the door, and strike up the "Hymn of the Sequestered Cat."
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_indicating the figure on the couch_)
+
+And doubtless waken Her?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_stubbornly_)
+
+I'll sing in a very small voice.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+And you'll scratch with your tiniest claws, I suppose? Stay here
+quietly, He commanded it when He went away.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_loftily_)
+
+Does He command me? He beseeches me, and that's my only reason for
+obeying him.
+
+(_He sits down again, apparently resigned, and yawns slowly_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_yawning_)
+
+You make me yawn.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+On the contrary, it's you who bore me. (_Temptingly_.) You're thinking
+what a good thing freedom is, aren't you?... A hen has probably escaped
+from the chicken yard--what sport you're missing!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+You really think so?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I said: probably.... Have you finished exploring that rabbit's hole?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_disturbed_)
+
+No ... it's so very deep! I almost buried myself, hollowing it out
+yesterday. The earth that stuck to my muzzle had some of the animal's
+fur in it....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_more and more satanic_)
+
+I suppose you'll finish that to-morrow ... or some other day. TOBY-DOG,
+(_sadly_)
+
+Why not say next year, while you're about it?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+What's the matter with you? Your shiny black lip hangs down an ell, and
+your froggy eyes glitter with tears. Are you crying?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_sniffling_)
+
+No ...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Poor, sensitive heart, console yourself. You'll have your pleasures and
+your friends again. At this very moment the farmer's dog is crunching
+bones in the kitchen ... to beguile the long wait for you.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_overcome_)
+
+Oh! oh! the farmer's dog!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+She's not alone either; that great dane, the watch-dog, keeps her
+company.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_rebellious_)
+
+That's not true!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Go see.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_after one bound toward the door_)  No, that would make
+noise.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+You're right, it would.
+
+(_A mournful silence follows_. TOBY _curls himself up like a turban and
+closes his eyes, because he feels like crying. His breath comes in
+little sobs_.)
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_absently, in a low, monotonous chant_.)
+
+The dog ... the little dog ... the bones, the little dog ... the rabbit
+... the great dane, the rabbit's hole ...the little dog, the mutton
+bones ...the rabbit's skin ...
+
+TOBY-DOG, _at first endures the torture heroically; then his nerves
+betray him and lifting his head he howls--the long plaint of the
+abandoned dog_.
+
+Wooo--oo--oooooo!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_from the top of the console-table_)
+
+Will you be quiet!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Wooooooooo!!--oo--oooo--oo!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_aside_)
+
+That's it! That's it!
+
+(SHE _wakes bewildered, still captive of her dreams, while the Cat
+listens patiently to the approaching step on the stairs, which means
+liberty for him and punishment for_ TOBY-DOG.)
+
+
+
+THE FIRST FIRE
+
+
+_Because it is raining and an October wind chases wet leaves through the
+air, She has lit the first fire of the season in the great
+chimney-place_. KIKI-THE-DEMURE _and_ TOBY-DOG, _in ecstasy, side by
+side on a corner of the warm hearth-stone, contemplate the flame with
+dazzled eyes and address their meditations to it_.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_looking very like a cushion; no paws visible_)
+
+Oh Fire, how splendid you are! You have come back more beautiful than my
+memory of you! You are hotter and nearer than the sun! The pupils of my
+eyes contract in your light, their lids half close, modestly hiding the
+joy I feel at seeing you again, and my inscrutable countenance shows but
+the semblance of a thought painted there in fawn color and black....
+Your crackling drowns the soft sound of my purr. Don't snap too much. Be
+merciful, O inconstant Fire! Don't sputter sparks on my fur. Allow me to
+adore you without fear ...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_half baked; eyes blood-shot; tongue pendant_)
+
+Fire! Divine Fire! Here you are again! I am still very young, but I
+remember how awe-struck I was the first time Her hand woke you in this
+same chimney-place. The sight of a god as mysterious as you are was most
+impressive to a baby-dog just out of the maternal stable. Oh Fire, I've
+not quite gotten over my fear! Hiii!... You spit at me, something red
+that smarts ... I'm afraid ... Well, it's gone now. How beautiful you
+are, Fire! Out from your ruddy center shoot tatters and shreds of gold,
+sudden spurts of blue, and smoke that twists upwards and draws queer
+shapes of beasts ... Oh, but I'm hot! Gently, gently, sovereign Fire,
+see how my truffle of a nose is drying up and cracking, and my ears--are
+they not ablaze? I adjure thee with suppliant paw. I groan ... ah ... I
+can endure it no longer!... (_He turns away_.) Nothing is ever perfect.
+The east wind coming under the door nips my hind-legs. Well, it can't be
+helped! I'll freeze behind if I must, provided I can adore you face to
+face.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I am a Cat and therefore aware of all that you bring in your train, O
+Fire! I foresee winter; its coming both troubles and pleases me. I've
+already begun to thicken and embellish my fur-coat in its honor, the
+darker stripes are becoming black, my white tippet swells into a
+dazzling boa, and the fur on my belly surpasses in beauty anything that
+has ever been seen. What shall I say of my tail, broad as a club, with
+alternate rings of fawn-color and black, or of the sensitive, priceless
+aigrettes which spring from my ears? My ear-rings She calls them....
+What cat could resist me! Ah! the January nights, the serenades under a
+frosty moon, the dignified wait on the pinnacle of a roof, the encounter
+with a rival cat on the narrow top of a wall!... But I feel quite sure
+of my superior strength. I'll swish my tail, put back my ears, sniff
+tragically as one does before vomiting, and then lift up my voice--its
+modulations are infinite. I'll make it strong enough to waken all the
+sleeping Two-Paws. I'll vociferate, I'll whimper, pacing up and down the
+garden, my body distended, my legs bent outward, feigning madness to
+terrify the tom-cats!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I know something of the changes and pleasures you foretell, Fire--for
+I'm a Dog. Already, it is raining in the garden. I suppose it's raining
+on the road too, and in the woods. The falling drops are not warm, as
+they were in the summer storms when my truffle, gray with dust,
+delighted in the damp smell that came from the west. The sky is troubled
+and the wind has grown strong enough to blow my ears out straight, like
+little flags. A sharp cry, such as I make when I beg, comes under the
+door. You'll be shining here every day, Fire; but I'll have to suffer
+for the right to worship you. For She'll continue to wander about, her
+head covered with the pointed hood which changes her so, that it
+frightens me. She'll put on wooden shoes too, and carelessly crush the
+puddles, the little heaps of mud, and the weeping mosses. I'll follow
+her, since I've promised to do so my life long (and also because I
+can't help it), I'll follow her, a forlorn and piteous object, shining
+wet, my belly covered with mud, until, through very excess of misery
+I'll forget, and ramble in the coppice, interested in every undulation
+of the grass, eager to revive the drowned scents in it.... She'll become
+communicative when she sees me hurrying along and we'll talk: "Ha,
+Toby-Dog," she'll say, "ha! ha! a bird! There on the branch! Look! you
+booby! Now he's gone." She'll condole with me then, until I'm on the
+verge of tears. "Oh, my little black boy, my sympathetic cylinder, my
+batrachian love, how cold you are, how wet, how sad, how you suffer,
+oooo!" And before I'm able to judge of the sincerity of her pity, the
+tears will overflow, my throat contract, and we'll wail in unison....
+
+Ah, but what delirious joy when the capricious wooden shoes turn again
+toward the house, hurrying to rejoin Him whom we've left scratching
+paper! They don't go half fast enough for me then! I jump 'round her,
+barking with delight to see the hill diminishing, our climb at an end,
+to smell the good stable smell and that of burning wood as we near the
+house. At last you shine forth, O Fire, O Sun, through the misty window
+pane!... I shall hardly have crossed the threshold when an overpowering
+sleepiness will dash me to the floor in front of you--you, who will
+reduce the mud on my belly to fine powder and change the water of the
+roads to smoky vapor.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE  A delightful glow penetrates my coat to the silky
+down, the impalpable colorless threads which protect my delicate skin. I
+feel myself swelling like a cloud. I must quite fill the room. My
+whiskers seem charged with electricity--a sign that I will sleep--but
+for the time being, the contemplation of your splendor and thoughts of
+the coming season keep me awake. It's raining. I shall not go out. I'll
+wait for the sun, or the dry wind, or better still, the frost. Ah, how
+the biting cold stimulates me! It lashes my lungs with handfuls of
+needles, and makes a _bonbon glace_ of my charming nose. The rollicking
+frost-sprite will blow his madness into me. She'll laugh and He too,
+leaving his scratching-paper, to see me vie with the leaves in bounds,
+leaps and wild whirlings, resembling a floating flurry of gray smoke
+rather than a Cat. To the top of a tree! Down again! Then seven turns
+after my tail! A perilous backward leap! A vertical jump, with aerial
+_danse du ventre_! Girations, sneezes, careering from the real to the
+dream, until in terror of myself, I come to a sudden stop.... Everything
+turns before my eyes. I'm the center of a strange, spinning world ... In
+my bewilderment (half-feigned) I'll make a little moo, like a cow, which
+will bring them both running to me,--She laughing, and He fearing
+something wrong. That will suffice to sober me, and with a bold front
+and noble mien, I'll regain this cushion near your altar, O Fire!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+This hearth-stone burns the horny pads of my feet. What shall I do?
+Move away? never! I'll toast to death rather than give up this
+redoubtable bliss. Heaven prevent Her coming, now! I've reason to fear
+the lash of the whip, and the magic words which mean exile: "Toby!
+that's stupid! I forbid you to roast yourself. You'll have sore eyes,
+and catch cold when you go out." That's what She says, while I regard
+her with a stupid look of utter devotion. But She's never duped by it. I
+hear noises upstairs, her step coming and going ... I wonder is her
+vagabond fancy wearied at last? This morning She whistled to me and in
+my haste to obey her, I rolled to the bottom of the stairs--being low
+and thick-set, with short legs, no nose, and almost no tail to balance
+me. Well, we set off. The last apples were rocking to-and-fro on swaying
+branches. My happy voice, a joyful shout from her now and then, the vain
+crowing of the cocks, the creaking of wagons on the road--all these
+sounds floated on a bluish, cottony, suffocating fog. She took me far,
+and many marvelous things happened on our way. We met terrible giant
+dogs. My proud bearing seemed to exasperate them, but I kept them back
+with a single look (besides, a closed iron gate rendered them
+powerless). I chased a rabbit into the thicket, though She cried loudly:
+"I forbid you to touch the little animal!" ... My mother certainly gave
+me swift legs but they're short, and the white end of the little beast
+kept far ahead. A bush covered with red berries detained us a very long
+time. She sees no objection to eating strange things and I can
+truthfully say that I always taste everything She offers me, for I've
+great faith in her. But this morning--"Eat, Toby, nice berries. Eat!
+here are some rose-hips. Oh stupid! how can you not dote upon their
+delicious flavor? I assure you these are comfits of Mother Nature's
+making." In deference to her, I chewed a reddish ball; there were some
+rough hairs on it--put there doubtless by her teasing hand--and what was
+bound to happen, did happen ... Khaha! My throat rejected the nasty
+"rosehip." ...
+
+But listen, Fire, what I saw after that, passes _my_ understanding. It
+was in a wood where stiff leaves rustled. Had She carried you under her
+cloak, or do gods like you come at her bidding? I saw her hands pile up
+the wood, arrange flat stones in some mysterious fashion, and then,
+Fire, I saw the sparks flash and your joyous soul palpitate, grow big,
+soar naked and rose-colored, veil itself in smoke, snap noisily (for
+yours is a belligerent soul), agonize--and disappear.... The world is
+full of incomprehensible things.... Last of all, on our way back, I
+discovered near the park gate--saw it before She did--one of those
+invincible beasts called hedge-hogs, the mere sight of which brings us
+dogs to bay. What madness to realize that an animal is hiding under that
+pin-cushion and laughing at me, and that I can do nothing, _nothing_! I
+implored her--She can do nearly everything--to pluck him for me. She
+began by turning him over with a little stick, as if he were a horse
+chestnut. "Astonishing," said She, "I can't find the top of him!" Then
+She took one of his spines between two fingers and carried him home that
+way--I dancing behind her--and put him in her work basket. After a while
+the horrid beast unrolled himself, stuck out a pig-like nose, opened two
+shiny rat's eyes and raised himself, holding fast by his little paws,
+which were exactly like a mole's. "How pretty he is," She cried, "a real
+little black pig." I stood near the table groaning with covetousness,
+but She didn't pluck him for me, not then, or ever, and perhaps the cook
+ate him.... This cat's a dissembler. Maybe _he_ ... But away with care!
+I'm too excitable! I mustn't let myself think of these things. Life is
+beautiful, O Fire, since you illumine it ... I'm going to sleep ...
+Watch over my unconscious body ... I'm going ... to sleep....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+One would think me asleep because the narrow slit made by my parted
+eyelids, seems but the continuation of that velvety line, that bold
+crayon-stroke, a sort of Oriental make-up, uniting my eyelids and my
+ears. But I'm awake, keeping watch like a yogi, in a state of blissful
+ankylosis, conscious of all that's going on around me.... My privileged
+eyes, Fire, do but behold you better when they're closed and I can count
+the various essences you mingle in a sparkling bouquet. Here in a flame
+of mauve-color and blue, glows the soul of a branch of arbor-vitae.
+Yesterday it waved a plume-like shadow on the garden walk ... To-day,
+with its delicate twigs, it is but a writhing skeleton. She cut it with
+one stroke of the pruning scissors. Why? That it might breathe out its
+fervent blue and mauve-colored soul? For like me, She delights in your
+dance, Fire, and chastises you when you're quiet, with a stern pair of
+tongs. Sitting there with her head bent and her arms hanging along her
+sides, what does She read, I wonder, in that fiery rose which is the
+labyrinthian heart of you?... She knows a great deal certainly, but not
+as much as a Cat.
+
+That thick tear on the log represents the anguish of a very old
+fir-tree, killed by the assiduous ivy. Just a short time ago I saw it
+struck down, lying on the grass, its foliage looking like a beautiful
+head of reddish hair. I saw the axe that felled it, too. Its trunk weeps
+tears of resin, which trail along in drivel, then change to heavy,
+creeping flame. But the dry red locks break into lines of living fire,
+whistle and shoot innumerable jets of many colors underneath a broad
+gold wave that rolls voluptuously....
+
+Ah, love ... hunting ... fighting.... It's your light, Fire, that
+discovers these passions in the depths of my being. It's time the little
+winged creatures searching withered berries came near. I'll have them
+soon! I'll watch, motionless in the brushwood, wildly wishing that the
+earth itself might hide me, the muscles of my legs twitching with desire
+to make the spring, my chin trembling.... Then, if I don't betray my
+hiding-place by an irrepressible quavering, frightening them away in one
+great commotion of wings and rustling branches!... But no, I'm master of
+myself. One bound at exactly the right moment and my feeble prey is
+panting under me. Oh, the ridiculous effort of a weak animal--its tiny
+ineffectual claws and pointed wings beating against my face! My jaws
+will open to the splitting point and my perfect nose wrinkle
+ferociously, for the joy of holding a living, terrified body. I'll know
+the intoxication of battle! I'll prance victoriously, shaking my head to
+torment the bird a little, for it faints away too soon between my teeth!
+Terrible to see I'll gallop towards the house, singing in a strangled
+voice, without loosening my grip, for He must stop his scratching to
+admire me, and She must give chase with distracted cries: "Wicked,
+savage cat! Drop that bird! drop that bird!! Oh, I beg of you! It hurts
+me so...." Ha! She never can have hunted....
+
+I intend to astonish the world, Fire, during Winter's reign. The Cat
+that lives at the farm (She says the farmer's cat, while we say the
+Cat's farmer), the fellow that's so badly dressed, disfigured by the
+nose of a weasel, and seems to walk on stilts, his legs are so
+long--well, he sharpens his claws and regards me the while. Patience!
+He's strong, brutal, irresolute, and utterly lacks distinction. The
+slamming of a door terrifies him; he puts back his ears and flies,
+panic-stricken. Still, I've seen him kill a good-sized hen, without
+making any fuss about it. For a glance of the young cat's deceitful
+eyes, or right of precedence on the garden wall, for a word of double
+meaning, for nothing, but the fun of the thing--I'll take my chances
+with him! He'll learn that a mysterious silence can demoralize the enemy
+quite as effectively as murderous cries. The low garden wall seems to me
+a convenient place. Let him try his hoarse miauling in all possible
+keys! May his unsightly face, and more hideous body dislocate itself in
+a deceitful ataxia (for they're still at these old tricks)! I'll be
+proof against it all, and merely flash the green magnetism of my
+magnificent eyes upon him. His brows will fall under their persistent
+insult, a shudder will run along his spine, he'll do a few steps of our
+ancient war dance--forward, back, forward again. But I'll
+stand--motionless as the statue of a Cat. The green witchcraft of my
+gaze will strike terror and madness into my rival and soon I'll see him
+writhe, utter false cries, and, as a last resource, try to balance
+himself on the nape of his neck, like a forked pear tree, only to roll
+over shamefully into the potato field....
+
+All that will come to pass, Fire, exactly as I've told it. To-day the
+future dawns in your new flame.... I'm growing drowsy.... My purr and
+your crackling are ceasing together.... I see you still and already I
+catch glimpses of my dreams.... The silky sound of the rain against the
+window is soft as a caress, and the water-pipe on the roof sobs low like
+a pigeon....
+
+Don't go out during my nap, Fire. Remember, you're the guardian of my
+august repose--that delicate death, known as a Cat's sleep....
+
+
+
+THE STORM
+
+
+_A suffocating summer's day in the country. The blinds of the house are
+half closed. Not a sound is heard from within; not a murmur from the
+parched garden, where even the sensitive leaves of the mimosa hang
+motionless_.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE _and_ TOBY-DOG _begin to feel uncomfortably conscious of
+the coming storm, which is yet but a slate-blue plinth thickly painted
+at the bottom of the dull blue sky-wall._
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_restlessly lying first on one side, then on the other_) No
+use! I can't be comfortable. What does this heat mean anyway? I must be
+sick. It began at breakfast; I didn't like the meat and sniffed
+disdainfully at my dog-biscuit. Something awful is going to happen. I
+haven't done anything wrong that I know of--my conscience is clear--and
+yet, I'm suffering. There lies my chum, shivering and unable to sleep. I
+know by his quick breathing that he feels just as I do.... I say, Cat?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_irritably, in a low tone_)
+
+Be quiet!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What? You're listening to some noise?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No! _Heavens_, no! Don't mention noise. The mere sound of your voice
+makes the skin on my back go in waves like the sea. TOBY-DOG,
+(_frightened_)
+
+Are you going to die?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I hope not. I've a sick headache. Can't you see the arteries throbbing
+under the almost hairless skin of my temples--the transparent, bluish
+skin that denotes a thoroughbred? It's atrocious! The veins on my
+forehead are like writhing vipers, and I don't know _what_ gnome forges
+in my brain! Oh, be quiet! Or at least speak so low that the coursing
+of my agitated blood may drown the sound of your voice....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+But it's this very silence that oppresses me. I tremble and don't know
+why. I long for the familiar voice of the wind in the chimney, the
+slamming of doors, the whispering of the garden, the poplars' ceaseless
+rustle--it always sounds like a trickling spring--
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+The uproar will come, soon enough.
+
+TOBY-DOG  Do you think so? I wish He'd scratch paper. It's an idle
+habit but an honored one. And see how listless She is, there in her
+wicker chair. Their silence frightens me more than anything. She seems
+asleep, but I can see her eyelashes move and the tips of her fingers,
+too. She's forgetting to play with the little balls of thread and
+doesn't sing, or whistle. She suffers just as we do.... Do you think
+this can be the end of the world, Cat?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+No. It's a storm. Heavens! how uncomfortable I am! If I could only get
+out of my skin, cast off this fleece which is smothering me, fling
+myself naked as a skinned mouse into a fresher atmosphere! Oh Dog, you
+cannot see the sparks that make every separate hair on my body crackle,
+but I feel them. Don't come near! A blue flame is going to shoot out of
+me....
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_shuddering_)
+
+Things are coming to an awful pass! (_He drags himself to the porch_.)
+_What_ have they done to the out-of-doors? Look! the trees are all blue
+and the grass glistens like a sheet of water. What mournful sunlight! It
+shines white on the slate roofs, and the little houses over there on the
+hill look like brand new tombstones. A heavy odor, like bitter almond,
+creeps from the white bell-shaped blossoms of the daturas, and makes me
+feel sick and faint. Far away, some smoke, heavy as the perfume of the
+daturas, goes slowly up in a straight line and falls again--like a
+broken aigrette.... But come and see for yourself!
+
+(KIKI-THE-DEMURE _walks falteringly to the porch_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+My word, _you're_ changed too, Cat! You look as if you were starving,
+your face is so drawn. Your fur is plastered down in some places and
+sticking up in others; gives you the expression of a weasel that had
+tumbled into oil.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Don't let that worry you! I'll regain my dignity--if ever another day
+dawns for us. To-day, I drag myself around unwashed, uncombed, like a
+woman out of love with love, and life....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+You say such distressing things. I think I'll whine and call for help.
+Perhaps I'd better go to Her, and look in her face for the comfort you
+refuse me. But She seems asleep now, in that wicker chair, and how can I
+read my fate in her eyes, when their lids are down. I'll lick her hand
+very respectfully and ever so lightly! That will wake her and oh, may
+her first caress drive away the evil charm!
+
+(_He licks the hand hanging at the side of the chair_.)
+
+SHE, (_with a scream_)  Heavens! how you frightened me! Was there ever
+such a ninny as this Dog? There!...
+
+(SHE _administers a smart rap on the nose_. TOBY'S _nerves give way and
+he howls loud and long_.)
+
+SHE
+
+Quiet! Not a word I say! Out of my sight! I don't know what's the
+matter, but I hate you! And that Cat sitting there, looking at me, like
+a bump on a log!...
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_bristling_)
+
+If She dares to touch me, I'll devour her!
+
+(_Just at this dangerous crisis a low rumbling is heard, distant and
+then near. Impossible to tell whether it comes from the horizon, or
+arises in the house itself. All three lose interest in the quarrel_.
+
+TOBY-DOG _and_ KIKI-THE-DEMURE _slink away, as if responding to a
+signal, and seek shelter, one under the bookcase and the other under an
+armchair_. SHE _turns anxiously to the leaden-hued garden, and the great
+violet bank of cloud, which of a sudden is riven by a blinding streak of
+blue fire_.)
+
+SHE, TOBY-DOG, KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_all together_)
+
+Oh!
+
+(_A sudden crash shakes the windows, and instantly a great rush of wind
+envelopes the house, with a noise as of flapping canvas:--all the garden
+prostrates itself_.)
+
+SHE, (_in anguish_)
+
+Heavens! the apples!
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_invisible_)
+
+I'll let them cut my ears into strips rather than leave this
+hiding-place!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_invisible_)
+
+I can't help hearing, and it's as if I saw everything that's going on.
+She hastens to close the windows. Someone is running on the stairs. Aie!
+Another awful flame--and everything is falling in! Silence now.... I
+wonder are they all dead? I'll look through the fringes of the chair,
+though it's risking my life to do so. Ah, hailstones making holes in
+the leaves! Here comes the rain, in silvery drops, wide apart, and so
+heavy that the gravel wrinkles up when they fall.
+
+SHE, (_heart-broken_)
+
+I can hear the peaches falling, and the green nuts too!
+
+(_All three are silent. Rain; quivering streaks of lightning; hissing in
+the pine-trees. The wind howls. A lull_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'm not quite so afraid as I was. The sound of the rain relaxes my tired
+nerves. I seem to feel its streaming warmth on my ears and the back of
+my neck. Now the hubbub is further off! I can hear myself breathe. The
+light coming under this bookcase, is brighter than it was. What is She
+doing? I daren't go out yet. If only the Cat would move! (_He sticks
+out his head, like a wary turtle. A flash of lightning makes him draw it
+back again_.) Ha! It's beginning all over again. Rain by the bucketfuls
+against the window-panes. Something in the chimney is trying to imitate
+that far-away rumbling. Everything's falling to pieces ... and _She_
+gave me a rap on the nose!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Drop by drop, a little brownish river is filtering under the loose
+window-sash. It's stretching out and out on the floor, winding its way
+over to me. I'm so hot and thirsty, I'd like to lap up some of it. My
+joints ache and my ears are tired of standing up like weather-cocks at
+every crash. My jaws are still clenched with nervous fear. The seat of
+this chair is too low; it annoys me, rubbing against the fur on my back.
+However, it's some comfort to be able to _think_ of such things--thanks
+to the peace that's descended on the house. The rain is falling quietly
+and the wind has gone down, but the memory of the din still hums in my
+ears. What can He be doing? The storm distresses him too. Why didn't He
+come forward to calm the raging elements? There She is, opening the
+porch door. Isn't it too soon?... No, for the hens are cackling like old
+maids as they hop over the puddles. We're going to have fine weather.
+Oh, the adorable smell of wet leaves and earth refreshed! It's so new,
+so pure, I seem to breathe for the first time!
+
+(_He creeps stealthily to the porch_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_suddenly_)
+
+Um! How good! That smells like a walk! Things change so quickly one
+hasn't time to think. She's opened the door? Let's run! (_He dashes
+out_.) Well! well! the garden has got back its own color again! A
+warmish vapor moistens my rough-grained nose. I'm filled with the desire
+to jump and run. The grass is reeking, shining wet. Horned snails are
+feeling around in the pink gravel with the tips of their eyes, and
+speckled black and white slugs embroider the wall with a silver ribbon.
+Oh! what a beautiful green and gold beastie running out there in the
+wet! Shall I catch it? Shall I scratch its metallic shell, until it
+breaks with a little crackling sound? No. I'd rather stay near Her.
+She's leaning against the door, taking deep breaths and smiling quietly
+to herself. I'm _so_ happy! Something inside me feels grateful to the
+whole world. The light is beautiful, and I'm quite sure that there'll
+never, never be another storm.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+I shan't wait any longer; I'm going out. I'll find dry places between
+the puddles for my dainty paws to step on. An imperceptible thrill runs
+through the streaming garden, making the jewels hung all about, tremble
+and sparkle.... The slanting rays of the setting sun find their
+reflection in my eyes which are spangled with green and gold. Down near
+the horizon, where the sky is still unsettled, a glittering sword leaps
+up and puts to flight the dark, fuming cloud-horses, that have been
+galloping over our heads. Now the odor of the daturas rises and perfumes
+all the air, mingled with that of lemon leaves, bruised by the hail.
+The roses are crowned with midges. Oh sudden springtime! An involuntary
+smile stretches the corners of my mouth. I'm going to play at tickling
+my nostrils with the point of a sweet-smelling blade of grass, carefully
+stretching my neck to avoid the falling drops. But I want Him to follow
+and admire me. Will He not come out and enjoy himself with us?
+
+(_A voice is heard humming the motif of the_ Regensbogen: _sol, si, re,
+sol, la, si,--all flats. A door opens and closes again_. HE _appears
+under the dripping foliage of vines and jasmine, framing the veranda,
+and at the same moment, a rainbow is seen in the sky_.)
+
+
+
+
+A CALLER
+
+
+(_A winter's afternoon, in Paris. The studio; a fire crackles gently in
+the tower-shaped stove_. TOBY-DOG _and_ KIKI-THE-DEMURE, _one on the
+floor, the other on his own particular cushion, proceed with the minute
+toilet which follows a long siesta. Peace reigns_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+My nails grow faster here than in the country.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+It's the contrary, with mine.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Really!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_bitterly_)
+
+Not to be wondered at! She clips them for the sake of the hangings ...
+Well! (_Magniloquently_), what can't be cured must be endured.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+What are you going to do to-day?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Why ... nothing.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_ironically_)
+
+For a change I suppose.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE Pardon, to _avoid_ change. What is this rage for change
+that takes possession of you all? Change means destruction. Only that
+which remains stationary is eternal.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'm eternal then, these three hours past.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+But you've been out with Her, haven't you? You came in like a whirlwind;
+bells rang, clothes were shaken out, you were sneezing and laughing and
+aureoled with icy air.... The end of her nose felt so cold when She
+kissed me on the forehead. She always kisses me there, just over the
+dark stripes forming the classic M, which She assures me stands for
+miaou and for Minet, my name in French.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Yes ... we had a fine run on the banks of the fortifications, and then
+we went into a shop.
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+Is that amusing?
+
+TOBY-DOG  Not often. There are a great many people crowded together.
+I'm immediately seized with the fear of losing Her, and I stick close to
+her heels, no matter what comes. Strange feet push and knock me about
+and step on my paws. I yelp but the skirts all around stifle my
+voice.... When we're out of it, we both look as if we'd been
+shipwrecked....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+May the gods preserve _me_ from anything of the sort! Here, the moments
+have glided peacefully by. When She's not in this house, there's
+nothing to hinder me; I employ the time as my system of hygiene
+dictates. After my breakfast of rosy liver and milk, my kittenhood seems
+to come back to me; I'm filled with a foolish gayety. I go over to him.
+He's rumpling big, blackish papers and welcomes me with a quiet smile;
+we loll on the same divan, and revel in a few idle moments together.
+Sometimes, with imperious paw, I tear the paper He holds like a screen
+between us. It always seems to me the most desirable--the one that
+crackles best. He cries out, and I throw myself on my back and wriggle
+with joy in a sort of horizontal dance, He calls "the dance of the
+bayadeer." Then somehow, everything dwindles before my eyes, grows dim,
+and far away; I want to rise and go back to my cushion, but dreams
+already separate me from the world ... Ah! blessed hour when you and She
+disappear, when the house is at rest and takes a long breath. Soon I'm
+in the depths of a dark, sweet sleep; my ears alone keep watch and turn
+like sensitive antennas towards vague sounds of doors and bells ...
+
+(_At this moment someone rings_. TOBY-DOG _and_ KIKI-THE-DEMURE _start
+and change their positions. The Cat, sitting, encircles himself with his
+fluffy tail. The Dog, in a sphinx-like attitude, lifts his head
+boldly_.)
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE
+
+What's that?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+A tradesman?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_shrugging his shoulders_)
+
+That's not the kitchen bell. Perhaps it's caller.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_with a bound_)
+
+What luck! They'll have tea and cakes! Come on!! Sugar, sugar! Little
+cakes! Little cakes!!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_gloomily_)
+
+To see ladies who shriek, and put gloved hands on my back--hands covered
+with dead skin?... ugh!
+
+(_Feminine voices are heard--Hers among them--and the clear tinkling of
+a little bell; then the door opens and a very diminutive toy terrier
+enters, alone. She's black and tan, seems in love with herself, and
+comes forward with a mincing step_.)
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_voice way up in her head_)
+
+I'm the darling little dog, so pretty!
+
+(TOBY _is struck dumb with admiration and astonishment_. KIKI,
+_indignant, has jumped on top of the piano and remains an unseen and
+hostile spectator_.)
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_astonished at not hearing the chorus of admiration
+that everywhere greets her, is reciting_--)
+
+I'm the darling little dog, so pretty! I weigh only one pound, eleven
+ounces, my collar is of gold, my ears of black satin, lined with shiny
+rubber, my nails are polished like the beaks of little birds. (_Catching
+sight of_ TOBY-DOG.) Oh!--someone--(_silence_). He's rather
+good-looking.
+
+(_They ogle and strut_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+How tiny she is!
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Sir--don't come near me.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Why not?
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+I don't know. My mistress knows. She's not here. She stayed in the other
+room.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+How old are you?
+
+THE LITTLE DOG  Eleven months, (_reciting_) I'm eleven months old. At
+the dog show, my mother took first prize for beauty. I weigh only one
+pound eleven ounces and--
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+You've said that already. What makes you so little?
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_from the piano_)
+
+She's ugly, and has an evil odor. Her paws are deformed, she can't stand
+still an instant, and this dog takes pains to make himself fascinating!
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_very coquettish and talkative_) It's my lineage, of
+course. One can hold me in a muff. You've seen my new collar? It's
+gold....
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+And what's that hanging from it?
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+My mother's medal, Sir. I always wear it. I come from the _Palais de
+Glace_, where I made quite a hit. Imagine! I wanted to bite a gentleman
+who was speaking to my mistress. _How_ they laughed!
+
+(_She wriggles and chirps_.)
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_aside_)
+
+What an odd creature! Is she _really_ a dog? (_Sniffs_.) Yes ... smells
+of rice powder, but it's a dog just the same. (_Aloud_.) Sit down a
+moment, it makes me quite dizzy to see you moving about so.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Certainly. (_She lies down, like a miniature greyhound, crossing her
+fore-paws to show the slimness of her toes_.) You were here all alone?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_looking toward the piano_)
+
+Yes, no other dog. Why?
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+There's a strange odor.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+The Cat, doubtless.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+The Cat? What's a Cat? I've never seen one. Do they leave you in the
+room all alone?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+It happens so now and then.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+And you don't bark? _I_ cry as soon as I'm left alone. I'm bored,
+afraid, feel sick, and chew up the cushions.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+And then you're whipped.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_insulted_)
+
+I'm--what did you say? You're losing your senses, I imagine. (_Suddenly
+amiable again_.) That would be a pity. You have lovely eyes.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Haven't I? They show well, don't they? They're large, and then they
+stick out. She says I have eyes like a lobster's, and sometimes She says
+"his beautiful seal's eyes, his frog-like eyes of gold."
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Who's She?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_simple_)
+
+She.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+I don't understand all you say, but I find you so _very_ sympathetic!
+What are you doing this evening?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Why ... I dine.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Naturally! I wanted to know whether they receive here this evening, or
+do _you_ go out?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+No, I've been out already.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Driving?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Walking--of course.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Why, of course? I hardly stir except in a carriage. Show me the
+underside of your paws. Horrors! One would say 'twas the stone they
+sharpen knives on! Look at mine. Satin on top, velvet underneath.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'd like to see you in the country, on the cobble-stones.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+I've been there, Sir. I was in the country last summer and there weren't
+any cobble-stones.
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Then it wasn't the country. You don't know what country means.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_vexed_)
+
+Indeed I do, Sir! It's fine sand, and velvety lawns that are swept every
+morning; it's a reclining chair on the grass, great, fresh cushions of
+cretonne, foamy milk, naps in the shade, and charming little red apples
+to play with.
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_shaking his head_)
+
+No. It's the road covered with white powder that makes the eyelids smart
+and the paws burn, the tough, shriveled, sweet-smelling grass, where I
+scratch my nose and my gums; it's the fearful night--for I'm the only
+one to guard them, He and She. I lie in my basket, but the beating of my
+poor overdriven heart keeps me awake. I hear a dog crying to me from far
+off, that the Bad Man has passed on the road. Is he coming in my
+direction? Will I be obliged in another minute, my eyes bloodshot and
+tongue dry as chalk, to throw myself upon him and devour his shadowy
+face?...
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_trembling and in ecstasy_)
+
+Go on! Go on! Oh! how frightened I am!...
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_modestly_)  Don't be afraid--it has never happened. All
+that is the country, yes, and the interminable hill, in the shadow of
+the carriage, when thirst, hunger, heat and fatigue, render the soul
+submissive and hopeless ...
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_quite worked up_)
+
+And then?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Oh, nothing. One arrives at the house, after all, and the pail of dark
+water, one drinks without taking breath, ("his tongue," She says, "his
+big tongue is parted in the center, like an iris-petal") while sore
+eyelids and dusty lashes are splashed with cooling drops.... The country
+is all that and many things besides....
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_on the piano, musingly_)
+
+All that, yes ...and the habits of the year before that one finds again,
+molded to one's shape, like a cushion marked with the imprint of a long
+sleep ...the long nights of freedom, when the lone owlet, with his sad
+little laugh, makes his way through the air as quietly as I do on the
+ground, and silvery gray rats cling to the vines, eating grapes and
+keeping their eyes on me at the same time. It's the sun-cure on the hot
+stone-wall, from which I arise wan and shrunken, baked through and
+through, but svelte enough to make the youngest tomcat envious. (_Coming
+back to the present with a murderous look at_ THE LITTLE DOG.) Death to
+you, ill-smelling beast, for having evoked these by-gone joys! Aren't
+you going to disappear, that I may come down from this cold pedestal,
+where my paws are growing numb?
+
+TOBY-DOG, (_enthusiastically to_ THE LITTLE DOG)
+
+But let us forget all that! With you there, I can think of nothing but
+you. I feel that I love you!
+
+THE LITTLE DOG, (_lowering her eyes_)
+
+Do you mean ...really?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Of course I do!
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+So soon!
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+We've already wasted a great deal of time.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+But ... we've been chatting. I've enjoyed it very much ... and I fail to
+understand why the society of young dogs like you, is forbidden me ...
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+Allow me to make love to you.
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+What's that?
+
+TOBY-DOG
+
+I'll show you. First I hold myself very erect, stiffen my legs, walk
+'round you, barking low and melodiously. My tail wriggles, my ears ...
+
+THE LITTLE DOG
+
+Don't come near me. I feel quite upset. (_Escaping_.) Aie! You
+unmannerly fellow!
+
+KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_standing up_)
+
+These preludes are indeed a sad parody on our wild love-making ...
+(_aloud, very angry_) I should think--
+
+THE LITTLE DOG _looks to see where the dreadful voice is coming from,
+and espies a strange striped monster with eyes afire, and eyebrows and
+whiskers bristling ferociously. She dashes towards the door crying_,
+
+Help, help! There's a tiger on the piano!...
+
+_And falls into the arms of her mistress, who has come upon the scene
+and proceeds to console her with great volubility; Fifi! my Zezette! My
+darling! there, there, goo, goo, goo, goo, you poor helpless little
+doggie! What did they do to her? Ooooo!--Ooo! Was it the naughty
+bow-bow? etc., etc., etc_.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Barks and Purrs
+by Colette Willy, aka Colette
+Translated by Maire Kelly
+
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