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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Night Out, by Edward Peple
+
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+Title: A Night Out
+
+Author: Edward Peple
+
+Release Date: November, 2005  [EBook #9295]
+[This file was first posted on September 17, 2003]
+
+Edition: 10
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: US-ASCII
+
+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK, A NIGHT OUT ***
+
+
+
+
+E-text prepared by Mary Meehan, Juliet Sutherland, David Garcia, and the
+Project Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+A NIGHT OUT
+
+BY EDWARD PEPLE
+
+_Frontispiece by_ R.L. GOLDBERG
+
+
+
+
+
+
+[Illustration: "The Beast has had the time of his life."]
+
+
+
+
+I
+
+
+Omar Ben Sufi was a cat. This unadorned statement would have wounded Omar
+Ben to the marrow of his pride, for he chanced to be a splendid
+tiger-marked feline of purest Persian breed, with glorious yellow eyes
+and a Solomon-in-all-his-glory tail. His pedigree could be traced
+directly back to Padisha Zim Yuki Yowsi Zind--a dignity, in itself,
+sufficient to cause an aristocratic languor; but, to the layman, he was
+just a cat.
+
+He dwelt with an exclusive family of humans in a little
+eighty-thousand-dollar cottage on the outskirts of vulgarity--which is
+to say, the villa was situated near enough to town to admit of marketing,
+but far enough removed therefrom to escape the clatter of plebeian toil
+and the noxious contact with the unhealthy, unwealthy herd. Here the
+humans entertained selected friends who came at the ends of weeks to
+admire the splendor of Omar Ben's tail, to bow down to the humans' money,
+and to hate them fiercely because they had it.
+
+The master did not toil. He lived, for certain hours of the day, in Wall
+Street, where he sank his patrician fingers into the throats of lesser
+men, squeezed them dry, then washed his hands in violet water, and built
+a church. True, he did not attend this church himself, but he built it;
+otherwise his neighbors might have been deprived of the opportunity of
+praising God.
+
+Omar Ben had a French maid all to himself--a perky little human with a
+quasi-kinship to the feline race--who combed him and brushed him and
+slicked him down and gave him endless, mortifying baths. Also, she tied
+lavender bows about his neck, and fed him from Dresden china on minute
+particles of flaked fish and raw sirloin, with a dessert of pasteurized
+cream.
+
+In the rear of the eighty-thousand-dollar cottage there was a
+thirty-thousand-dollar flower-garden--an oppressively clean garden, where
+the big Jack-roses were as immaculate as a "mama's Lizzie-boy," and the
+well-bred, timid little violets seemed to long to play in the dirt, yet
+dared not because of the master-rule of "form." And here the clean cat
+used to sun himself in the clean garden, thinking his clean thoughts and
+perishing of _ennui_ clean through.
+
+Then, one day, from the vulgar outer world came an unclean incident.
+
+Omar Ben became conscious of an uproar beyond the garden wall. It
+embraced a whimper of canine hope, a spitting taunt, and the patter of
+flying paws; then, suddenly, on the top of the high brick wall appeared a
+cat. The newcomer paused an instant to fling an obscene _au revoir_ at
+the raging, disappointed dog, dropped carelessly down into a
+geranium-bed, and took his bearings.
+
+He was not a patrician. Omar Ben eyed him in a sort of wondering awe. The
+stranger was a long-barreled, rumple-furred, devil-clawed street arab,
+of a caste--or no-caste--that battles for existence with the world--and
+beats it. On his tail were rings of missing fur, suggesting former
+attachments, not of lady friends, but of tin cans and strings. For
+further assets, he possessed one eye and a twisted smile. His present
+total liability lay in the dog beyond the wall, so the arab wasn't so
+badly fixed, after all. Besides, he owned property. It consisted of a
+bullfrog which he carried in his mouth, with its legs and web feet
+protruding in wriggly, but unavailing, protest.
+
+To breathe the better, the street cat dropped his frog and set one mangy
+paw upon it; then, suddenly, he spied the Persian.
+
+"Hello, bo!" he observed cheerfully. "Didn't see yer. Did yer pipe me
+chase wid de yelper? Dat stilt-legged son of a saw-toothed tyke has had
+his nose on me rudder-post fer more'n a mile."
+
+The Persian made no answer, and the arab continued, unabashed:
+
+"It's a hunch dat I could 'a' clawed de stuffin's outer him, but I didn't
+want fer to lose me lunch. Say! Wot's yer name?"
+
+Omar Ben regarded the interloper with the same glance of refined surprise
+that the master might have employed when a fleeced plebeian entered his
+office, demanding to know why the market had slumped in direct
+contradiction to confidential prophecy. He elevated his patrician brows,
+but gave the desired information politely:
+
+"My ribbon-name is Omar Ben Sufi, first-born of the second litter of Yiki
+Zootra and Sultana Yaggi Kiz. Here at home, however, I am known by a
+variety of others, such as _Mon Prince de Maniere Charmante_,
+Sugar-pie-precious, and--"
+
+"Aw, cut it!" snapped the street cat disgustedly. "Dem ain't no decent
+names! D'ey's positive ridick'lous! _Mine's_ Ringtail Pete, but me
+frien's has reasons fer fergittin' de tail part of it when dey names me
+to me face--see?"
+
+He smiled his twisted smile, raised one paw, and regarded its claws with
+a sort of humorous pride.
+
+The Persian cat said nothing. Ringtail Pete was obviously an undesirable
+acquaintance; therefore Omar Ben held his tongue, and became interested
+in the bullfrog. Curiosity, however, conquered refined reserve.
+
+"What is it?" he asked presently.
+
+"Frawg," said the street cat, with laconic candor, as he gracefully
+mauled the subject of discussion. "I gets 'em over to the frawg-pawnd up
+back of Lumkins's tannery. Have a piece?"
+
+"Thank you, no," returned the Persian, with a faint smile of his own.
+"I've just had luncheon."
+
+Pete shrugged his gaunt shoulders, murdered the frog, and prepared to
+dispose of it permanently. Omar Ben edged closer. In spite of his polite
+refusal, the frog fascinated him. Never in all his benighted life had he
+tasted one morsel which had not been prepared for him on dainty china;
+but now it was different. Across the geranium-bed came a strange,
+alluring scent--a scent which roused the memory of inheritance--a memory
+well-nigh washed out of him, and his sire before him, by the bottle-pap
+of luxury. A memory it was of wild things, to be killed--a blood-lust
+memory--and now at last it woke in a pampered, velvet-hearted cat.
+
+Ringtail Pete was conscious of the other's wistful look, and laughed; for
+his battle with life had taught him generosity.
+
+"Say, bo, yer don't want to do de bashful--see?--'cause me 'n' you is
+gents what understands de game er chanst. Here--take holt an' chaw
+yerse'f off a hunk!"
+
+The aristocrat hesitated, then slid down one rung on the ladder of
+degradation--pushed by blood-lust and by the strange compelling
+_camaraderie_ of an arab of the streets. It was wrong, he knew, but then
+there was a certain flavor in this wrong; so, gingerly, he crossed the
+geranium-bed, took one web foot firmly between his teeth, and wondered at
+the thrill of life that sparked and snapped along his spine. Then Pete
+and Omar Ben tugged and tugged, till the clean geranium-bed was a
+comfortable, wholesome wreck.
+
+"Hully gee!" grinned Ringtail Pete. "We otter make a wish!"
+
+They made it, and the metaphoric wish-bone parted with a jerk, Omar Ben
+rolling upon his lordly back in the healthy dirt; but he rose and
+devoured his frog-leg to its smallest bone, wishing with all his heart
+that the frog had been a bigger frog. Then he licked his chops and looked
+in admiration on his worldly friend.
+
+"Thank you, _so_ much," he began, but the arab waved formality aside.
+
+"Aw, 't wan't nuttin'," he declared, "an' dey tastes a darn sight better
+when yer wades fer 'em. Say! Look-a-here! You meet me to-night on de top
+er dis here wall, an' I'll learn yer how to wade fer frawgs."
+
+"Oh, dear!" began the Persian, trembling at the very mention of the outer
+world. "Really, Mr. Pete, I--really--"
+
+"Punk!" cut in the arab, dismissing the protest with a switch of his
+mutilated tail. "I won't take 'naw' fer a answer; an' dis here's de way
+fer to jump yer wealthy crib. You watch me!"
+
+He backed away, then took a running start and made the coping of the
+wall in a splendid, scurrying rush, amid a shower of scattered
+ivy-leaves. On the top he turned and called to the wondering aristocrat:
+
+"Jes' wait fer me an' de moon, me son, an' dontcher fergit dat frawgs
+is frawgs!"
+
+Once more he smiled his twisted smile, and was gone into the vulgar outer
+world. He had not waited for a promise from his friend, for Pete was wise
+in his little hour of life and left the keeping of a tryst with the honor
+of a gentleman.
+
+
+
+
+II
+
+
+As for Omar Ben, he sat in the healthy grime of the garden soil, his mind
+a prey to the poison of glittering promises, till suddenly a human fell
+upon him with an absurd French shriek and bore him away to the lap of
+comfort and a scented bath.
+
+In the bath he yowled; and wept when another lavender bow was tied about
+his neck; and yet, had Mlle. Frenchy observed him carefully, she might
+have caught him smiling.
+
+All day long he dozed and dreamed--dreamed of the vulgar world beyond
+the wall--for now it seemed to his pampered soul that the pole star of an
+earthly cat's desire was "frawgs."
+
+At the humans' dinner-time he scorned their expensive fare and sneaked
+away into the shadows of the garden to wait for Ringtail Pete and the
+rising of the moon. It rose; and, as it peeped above the wall, there also
+rose a cautious signal-wail, and Pete's one eye glowed green among the
+ivy-vines.
+
+"Hi, spote!" grinned the owner of the eye, as Omar Ben clawed his way to
+a perch beside him. "Yer clumb dat wall in a way dat make me proud. Now,
+den, we're off!"
+
+They dropped into the outer world. Omar Ben was trembling somewhat, but
+tried his best to conceal the mortifying fact, and presently he conquered
+it. After walking for a quarter of a mile along a country road, they
+approached the outskirts of the town and began to cross it, employing
+unfrequented paths. They traversed an alley, black and reeking with
+nightly smells, pausing at last on the verge of a lighted street whence
+rose the sound of human mirth, bits of vulgar song, and the barking of
+vagrant dogs.
+
+"S-h-h-h!" cautioned Ringtail. "You wait till I counts to t'ree, den
+make a rush fer de alley acrost de street--see?"
+
+"But, why?" asked Omar Ben, wondering.
+
+Pete sniffed in scorn of the uninitiated.
+
+"Well, nemmine why! You do like I tells yer, or yer'll git yer
+eggercation wid a brick. Now den! One--two--t'ree! Hump it, bo!"
+
+They humped it, making the other alley's mouth by a margin slim indeed,
+followed by human howls and a clattering volley of sticks and stones.
+
+"Good gracious!" the Persian gasped, as they streaked through the
+alley's filth. "What _are_ they?"
+
+"Boys," grinned Pete. "De town is gittin' fair congested wid 'em. But
+'tain't nuttin', son; it's jes' a part er de game er life. Come on."
+
+The way was easier now, and they journeyed without alarm. Presently
+Ringtail turned to his friend with his twisted smile:
+
+"Yer see dat lady settin' on de gate-post? Well, dat's me steady. I'll
+interjuce yer in a minute."
+
+The lady in question was a thin, dirty white cat with bold eyes and a
+brazen bearing, and Omar Ben was doubtful of her caste.
+
+"Thank you," he murmured non-committally, and hurried on; but the
+meeting was unavoidable, for the lady crossed the street and stood
+directly in his path.
+
+"Hi, Mame!" said Pete, in cordial greeting. "Shake hands wid me friend,
+Mr.--er--aw hell! Shake hands wid bo!"
+
+Omar Ben had never seen a lady-cat, and his ideal of the sex was
+something modest and retiring. Miss Mame was not retiring. She greeted
+her friend's friend without the courtesy of a "Mr.," looked in open
+admiration at the handsome gentleman, and asked if he were single.
+
+The aristocrat murmured a commonplace and edged away. At the slight the
+lady took umbrage, spat warningly, and showed her claws, till Ringtail
+averted trouble by a generous display of tact.
+
+"Now, don't git phony, Mame!" he remarked in a gentle whisper. "De gent's
+all right, but he's young, dat's all, an' I'm goin' to learn him--see?
+You chase aroun' fer Lizzie, an' if de goil ain't got no udder date, yet
+kin meet us here 'bout moondown, an' we'll bring yer a brace er frawgs.
+So long, Mame! Remember dat I loves yer!"
+
+With a partly mollified sniff, the lady retired to her gate-post, and the
+two adventurers went on. They came to the evil-smelling tannery, and to
+the frog-pond just behind it, stretching cold and still in the moonlight,
+and covered with a noxious, slimy scum. It was horribly different from
+the Persian's usual baths, but, once in he forgot its chill in the lust
+of the hunt.
+
+They waded and swam and scrambled along the shore, Ringtail pointing out
+that frogs were wont to crouch close down by the water's edge in the
+shadow of some bush or vine.
+
+"Dere's one!" he whispered suddenly. "Now, sneak up, son, an' grab 'im!"
+
+Quivering with suppressed excitement, Omar Ben sneaked, but mistook the
+especial frog to which his friend had reference. Instead, he pounced upon
+a big yellow-throated beast weighing a pound and a half, and known
+colloquially as a "sockdolliger" or a "joogger-room." There followed a
+scuffling rush, a grunt, a startled yowl, and a swirl of water; then Omar
+Ben came up coughing, minus his frog, but plus an overcoat of mud and
+disappointment.
+
+"Great snakes!" yelled Pete. "Ain't yer got no gumption 't all? Ef I had
+knowed yer wanted ter eat a cow, I'd 'a' took you up to de
+slaughter-house! Go fer de little ones, bo. Yer don't gain nuttin' by
+bein' a hawg. Take it from me--it's straight!"
+
+"Bo" went for the little ones. He had learned his lesson of experience,
+and profited thereby. He made his virgin kill and devoured it, squatting
+in the muddy pond, while around him rose the voices of the wild things of
+the night; and never had morsel tasted sweeter to his pampered tongue.
+And so the hunt went on, a never-to-be-forgotten hunt, when crawfish
+nipped their tails, when insects preyed upon their eyes, and they dripped
+with the sweat of joyful toil; then, presently, the friends stretched out
+upon the bank, weary and replete.
+
+"Say, bo," said Ringtail, after a restful pause, "what do yer say to a
+nip?"
+
+"A nip?" asked Omar Ben in astonishment. "What kind of a nip?"
+
+"W'y, a catnip, yer bloomin' bladderskite! Wot did yer t'ink I meant--a
+cornder of de moon? I'm talkin' 'bout jes' straight catnip. Are you on?"
+
+"Yes, certainly," returned the Persian gravely. "I am on!"
+
+On the homeward way they turned into a lane and came to a clump of
+catnip. True, Omar Ben had tasted the herb before, but dry and in
+five-cent packages, which was different from the pure article direct from
+nature's still and exuding its sharp, intoxicating breath. Pete and Omar
+fell upon it greedily, rolled upon it, wallowed among the scattered
+leaves, and chewed and chewed till their senses swam in a spirit-dance of
+ecstasy. Then, after a nap, the two reeled homeward down the road, Pete
+smiling his twisted smile, and Omar Ben Sufi wrapped in the comforting
+belief that he was singing tunefully.
+
+"Say, R.T.," the Persian chuckled happily, "what did you say was the name
+of your lady friend's other lady friend?"
+
+"Lizzie," answered Ringtail, astounded at the tone of familiarity; "an'
+take it from me she's white!"
+
+"In color, do you mean?"
+
+"Naw--in disposition. Outside, she's kind of striped, but inside, de
+lady's white; an' don't yer fergit it, bo, she's de owner of four good
+sets of claws.
+
+"Thank you," said Omar Ben airily. "I shall endeavor to remember. Come
+along, R.T.!"
+
+Pete objected somewhat to this pointed abbreviation of his name, but
+forgave his friend on the grounds that he was drunk; so the two went on
+and sought their rendezvous. The ladies were waiting, seated expectantly
+on the gate-posts, but descended at Ringtail's call, and the "swell gent"
+was formally introduced. Miss Lizzie seemed to like him immensely, and
+the two progressed so well that Ringtail stretched his single eye to its
+utmost capacity, cursing softly at his friend's unprecedented cheek. For
+Omar Ben--thanks to his nip of catnip--so far forgot his strained reserve
+that Miss Lizzie herself said afterward to a friend, in confidence:
+
+"I never _see_ sech a _forward_ gent sence me 'n' you was a couple er
+half-way-drownded kits!"
+
+The flirtation, however, was short-lived, for suddenly, without an
+instant's warning, Miss Lizzie, Miss Mame, and Pete himself went clawing
+up a water-pipe to a convenient roof above, while down the street came
+floating a shrill, defiant yowl.
+
+"Chase yerse'f, bo!" called Pete in a voice of fear. "It's Ash-Can Sam!"
+
+Now, Ash-Can Sam had a reputation of his own, as every cat in the
+neighborhood could testify with sorrow and with tears. He weighed eleven
+pounds. He kept himself in training; and, where others lived for love or
+wealth or art, Ash-Can Sam existed for a finish fight alone. At the
+present speaking he came swaggering around a corner, and paused in
+astonishment at the sight of a stranger sitting in the middle of the
+street. The insolence of it! It was past belief!
+
+"Oh, please, Mr. Bo!" wailed Lizzie, wringing her paws as she perched
+upon the roof. "Do hurry while youse has got de chanst! He'll rip you
+somethin' terrible! For _my_ sake, dearie, _won't_ you slope?"
+
+"No, not upon your life!" called Omar Ben gravely. "I will not demean
+myself by retreating from any cat alive."
+
+This statement was fat with brave audacity, but lean in the matter of
+discretion; so Pete leaned down with one last friendly whisper of appeal:
+
+"W'y, you chowder-headed ass, he'll make yer look like a moth-et flannel
+shirt! _Beat it_!"
+
+The patrician declined to "beat it," and Ash-Can Sam edged a little
+closer, wearing a dissolute, wicked leer of joy. He circled slowly round
+the stranger cat, eying Omar Ben's glossy coat and humming a sort of
+vulgar chant:
+
+  Ain't it a sham-m-m-m-e!
+    To chaw up mommer's sugar-pet,
+    An' hurt his nose, not soon, but yet.
+  Oh, ain't it a sham-m-m-m-e!
+
+Omar Ben regarded the bully in calm scorn. "You disreputable beast," he
+said, "shut up!"
+
+Sam, in no uncertain terms, stated his unwillingness to shut up, and the
+conversation became personal.
+
+"Yer blink-eyed yard er silk, I'm a goin' to turn you cat-out-the-skin
+an' sell yer tail fer a fancy dustin'-brush!"
+
+"Bosh! You'd run from a pet canary."
+
+"You're a liar!"
+
+"You're another!"
+
+"So's yer pa an' so's yer mother!"
+
+"_Pfst! Zzz-i-ttt! Y-eo-w!_"
+
+And the battle was on.
+
+"Oh, dear!" mewed Lizzie tearfully. "An' Mr. Bo was sech a easy-mannered
+gent'man, too!"
+
+Sub-consciously, she was already referring to the foolish Persian in the
+past tense; yet, in view of probable results, and in the stress of such
+violent circumstance, her anti-mortem sorrow might at least be pardoned.
+
+Omar Ben had never had a fight, and yet the memory of inheritance had
+waked within him, revealing other traits besides his yearning for
+debauchery and "frawgs"; so now he squared himself and uncurled his
+velvet toes.
+
+Ash-Can Sam crouched low and came in with a headlong rush. Omar Ben
+side-stepped and raked him with a stiffly extended paw. It was a good
+rake, and there was fur upon his claws--and blood.
+
+"Hully gee!" breathed Pete into Mame's convenient ear. "Did yer pipe de
+way bo upper-cut 'im? Gee!"
+
+Ash-Can Sam was wounded--not so much in body as in pugilistic pride. He
+turned to wipe away the stain, and, incidentally, to wipe the earth with
+the body of a foreign cat. This time he came in, swearing, and the two
+cats reared upon their haunches with the shock; then fell in a tangled,
+rending, yowling snarl. Omar Ben, by instinctive craft, sought for a
+point of vantage underneath his foe--a vantage because, when lying on his
+back, he could claw straight up with all four feet, and the greater the
+weight of the chap on top, the greater his woe--abdominally.
+
+This point of vantage, however, is rather difficult to hold, with two
+most earnest gentlemen desirous of it; and so they changed
+positions--changed so rapidly, in fact, that their bodies resembled a
+sort of pyrotechnic pinwheel whose centrifugal sparks were composed of
+eyes and claws and tufts of fur and cat profanity. Also, it lasted longer
+than the ordinary pinwheel, and was a trifle more uproarious; but it died
+at last with a sizzling spit, and a lean black streak shot out toward the
+haven of an alley's mouth.
+
+The streak was Ash-Can Sam. Omar Ben Sufi sat down in the middle of the
+street, and wondered. He had thrashed something, and he didn't understand
+it. So he just sat there, quivering, bleeding, battered--but a conqueror.
+
+Ringtail Pete endeavored to express himself, but emotion choked him;
+therefore he spat fervidly and said:
+
+"Hully gee!"
+
+Then he and the ladies descended from the roof, to walk in silent circles
+around the champion, regarding him with a species of cataleptic awe.
+Presently, however, Pete came to earth, extended his paw, and delivered
+himself of an established truth:
+
+"Well, dang my hide, but it takes er 'ristercrat fer to glitter in a
+scrap!"
+
+They escorted him all the way to his eighty-thousand-dollar home. The
+ladies kissed him--both of them--and helped him to clamber weakly over
+his garden wall.
+
+He turned to Ringtail with an easy, aristocratic smile: "_Au revoir,_
+R.T.! Those frawgs were most delicious!"
+
+"Hully gee!" breathed Pete, and disappeared through the dusk of the
+outer world.
+
+
+
+
+III
+
+
+Now, in the eighty-thousand-dollar cottage black sorrow reigned
+throughout the night. There were tears and linguistic prayers. There
+were tinklings of little bells, while humans called shrilly to
+vulgar officials along the wires. From a mass of incoherence the
+officials learned that some evil-hearted ruffian had entered the
+thirty-thousand-dollar garden and had stolen a priceless cat.
+
+Thus the outer world went hunting. So great was its zeal--so great was
+the offer of reward--that it captured every cat in town, with the one
+exception, of course, of Omar Ben Sufi. This particular hero was found
+next morning, asleep, in the geranium-bed; so they bore him in, while
+weepings burst forth afresh. And well they might.
+
+Poor Omar Ben was a sight to awaken pity, even in the stoniest of hearts.
+The number of his hairs could be counted, almost, by plus and minus
+tufts; one eye was closed; his splendid tail was bent in several angles
+unrecognized by the rules of art, and he smelled of the outer
+world--horribly.
+
+His mistress expressed her grief in a noiseless, refined whimper of
+despair; the French maid shrieked, and called on Heaven to witness the
+devastation of her every hope; but the master--who had lived, in spite of
+his Wall Street training--laughed.
+
+"Nonsense!" said he. "You are squandering your sympathies upon a
+shameless prodigal. The beast has had the time of his life, by George!"
+
+"Oh, Charles, how _can_ you?" wailed the mistress of the priceless cat.
+"Can't you see how the precious child is suffering?"
+
+Again the master laughed--laughed brutally.
+
+"Of course he's suffering, my dear--but look at the smile on him!"
+
+
+
+
+*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK, A NIGHT OUT ***
+
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