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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/8886-0.txt b/8886-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..8430103 --- /dev/null +++ b/8886-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,12796 @@ +The Project Gutenberg eBook of A Rough Shaking, by George MacDonald + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and +most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions +whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms +of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at +www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you +will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before +using this eBook. + +Title: A Rough Shaking + +Author: George MacDonald + +Release Date: September, 2005 [EBook #8886] +This file was first posted on August 20, 2003 +Last Updated: May 20, 2023 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: UTF-8 + +Produced by: Distributed Proofreaders + +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A ROUGH SHAKING *** + + + + + A ROUGH SHAKING + + By George MacDonald + + + + + CONTENTS. + + + CHAP. + I. HOW I CAME TO KNOW CLARE SKYMER. + II. WITH HIS PARENTS. + III. WITHOUT HIS PARENTS. + IV. THE NEW FAMILY. + V. HIS NEW HOME. + VI. WHAT DID DRAW OUT HIS FIRST SMILE. + VII. CLARE AND HIS BROTHERS. + VIII. CLARE AND HIS HUMAN BROTHERS. + IX. CLARE THE DEFENDER. + X. THE BLACK AUNT. + XI. CLARE ON THE FARM. + XII. CLARE BECOMES A GUARDIAN OF THE POOR. + XIII. CLARE THE VAGABOND. + XIV. THEIR FIRST HELPER. + XV. THEIR FIRST HOST. + XVI. ON THE TRAMP. + XVII. THE BAKER’S CART. + XVIII. BEATING THE TOWN. + XIX. THE BLACKSMITH AND HIS FORGE. + XX. TOMMY RECONNOITRES. + XXI. TOMMY IS FOUND AND FOUND OUT. + XXII. THE SMITH IN A RAGE. + XXIII. TREASURE TROVE. + XXIV. JUSTIFIABLE BURGLARY. + XXV. A NEW QUEST. + XXVI. A NEW ENTRANCE. + XXVII. THE BABY HAS HER BREAKFAST. + XXVIII. TREACHERY. + XXIX. THE BAKER. + XXX. THE DRAPER. + XXXI. AN ADDITION TO THE FAMILY. + XXXII. SHOP AND BABY. + XXXIII. A BAD PENNY. + XXXIV. HOW THINGS WENT FOR A TIME. + XXXV. CLARE DISREGARDS THE INTERESTS OF HIS EMPLOYERS. + XXXVI. THE POLICEMAN. + XXXVII. THE MAGISTRATE. + XXXVIII. THE WORKHOUSE. + XXXIX. AWAY. + XL. MALY. + XLI. THE CARAVANS. + XLII. NIMROD. + XLIII. ACROSS COUNTRY. + XLIV. A THIRD MOTHER. + XLV. THE MENAGERIE. + XLVI. THE ANGEL OF THE WILD BEASTS. + XLVII. GLUM GUNN. + XLVIII. THE PUMA. + XLIX. GLUM GUNN’S REVENGE. + L. CLARE SEEKS HELP. + LI. CLARE A TRUE MASTER. + LII. MISS TEMPEST. + LIII. THE GARDENER. + LIV. THE KITCHEN. + LV. THE WHEEL RESTS FOR A TIME. + LVI. STRATEGY. + LVII. ANN SHOTOVER. + LVIII. CHILD-TALK. + LIX. LOVERS’ WALKS. + LX. THE SHOE-BLACK. + LXI. A WALK WITH CONSEQUENCES. + LXII. THE CAGE OF THE PUMA. + LXIII. THE DOME OF THE ANGELS. + LXIV. THE PANTHER. + LXV. AT HOME. + LXVI. THE END OF CLARE SKYMER’S BOYHOOD. + + + + + ILLUSTRATIONS. + + + MRS. PORSON FINDS CLARE BY THE SIDE OF HIS DEAD MOTHER + CLARE IS HEARD TALKING TO MALY + CLARE MAKES FRIENDS DURING MR. PORSON’S ABSENCE + THE BLACKSMITH GIVES CLARE AND TOMMY A ROUGH GREETING + CLARE, TOMMY, AND THE BABY IN CUSTODY + CLARE AND ABDIEL AT THE LOCKED PUMP + CLARE PROCEEDS TO UNTIE THE ROPES FROM THE RING IN THE BULL’S NOSE + CLARE FINDS THE ADVANTAGE OF A POWERFUL FRIEND + THE GARDENER’S DISCOMFITURE + CLARE ASKS MISS SHOTOVER TO LET HIM CARRY ANN HOME + CLARE IS FOUND GIVING THE SHOE-BLACK A LESSON + CLARE ASLEEP IN THE PUMA’S CAGE + + + + + Dedicated + to my great-nephew, + Norman MacKay Binney, + aged seven, + because his Godfather and Godmother + love him dearly. + +Hampstead, August 26, 1890. + + + + + A ROUGH SHAKING. + + + + + Chapter I. + + HOW I CAME TO KNOW CLARE SKYMER. + + +It was a day when everything around seemed almost perfect: everything +does, now and then, come nearly right for a moment or two, preparatory +to coming all right for good at the last. It was the third week in +June. The great furnace was glowing and shining in full force, driving +the ship of our life at her best speed through the ocean of space. For +on deck, and between decks, and aloft, there is so much more going on +at one time than at another, that I may well say she was then going at +her best speed, for there is quality as well as rate in motion. The +trees were all well clothed, most of them in their very best. Their +garments were soaking up the light and the heat, and the wind was +going about among them, telling now one and now another, that all was +well, and getting through an immense amount of comfort-work in a +single minute. It said a word or two to myself as often as it passed +me, and made me happier than any boy I know just at present, for I was +an old man, and ought to be more easily made happy than any mere +beginner. + +I was walking through the thin edge of a little wood of big trees, +with a slope of green on my left stretching away into the sunny +distance, and the shadows of the trees on my right lying below my +feet. The earth and the grass and the trees and the air were together +weaving a harmony, and the birds were leading the big orchestra--which +was indeed on the largest scale. For the instruments were so +different, that some of them only were meant for sound; the part of +others was in odour, of others yet in shine, and of still others in +motion; while the birds turned it all as nearly into words as they +could. Presently, to complete the score, I heard the tones of a man’s +voice, both strong and sweet. It was talking to some one in a way I +could not understand. I do not mean I could not understand the words: +I was too far off even to hear them; but I could not understand how +the voice came to be so modulated. It was deep, soft, and musical, +with something like coaxing in it, and something of tenderness, and +the intent of it puzzled me. For I could not conjecture from it the +age, or sex, or relation, or kind of the person to whom the words were +spoken. You can tell by the voice when a man is talking to himself; it +ought to be evident when he is talking to a woman; and you can, +surely, tell when he is talking to a child; you could tell if he were +speaking to him who made him; and you would be pretty certain if he +was holding communication with his dog: it made me feel strange that I +could not tell the kind of ear open to the gentle, manly voice saying +things which the very sound of them made me long to hear. I confess to +hurrying my pace a little, but I trust with no improper curiosity, to +see--I cannot say the interlocutors, for I had heard, and still heard, +only one voice. + +About a minute’s walk brought me to the corner of the wood where it +stopped abruptly, giving way to a field of beautiful grass; and then I +saw something it does not need to be old to be delighted withal: the +boy that would not have taken pleasure in it, I should count half-way +to the gallows. Up to the edge of the wood came, I say, a large +field--acres on acres of the sweetest grass; and dividing it from both +wood and path stood a fence of three bars, which at the moment +separated two as genuine lovers as ever wall of “stones with lime and +hair knit up” could have sundered. On one side of the fence stood a +man whose face I could not see, and on the other one of the loveliest +horses I had ever set eyes upon. I am no better than a middling fair +horseman, but, for this horse’s sake, I may be allowed to mention that +my friends will all have me look at any horse they think of buying. +He was over sixteen hands, with well rounded barrel, clean limbs, +small head, and broad muzzle; hollows above his eyes of hazy blue, and +delicacy of feature, revealed him quite an old horse. His ears pointed +forward and downward, as if they wanted on their own account to get a +hold of the man the nose was so busily caressing. Neither, I presume, +had heard my approach; for all true-love-endearments are shy, and the +man had his arm round the horse’s neck, and was caressing his face, +talking to him much as Philip Sidney’s lady, whose lips “seemed at +once to kiss and speak,” murmured to her pet sparrow, only here the +voice was a musical baritone. That there was something between them +more than an ordinary person would be likely to understand appeared +patent. + +Whether or not I made an involuntary sound I cannot tell: I was so +taken with the sight, bearing to me an aspect of something eternal, +that I do not know how I carried myself; but the horse gave a little +start, half lifted his head, saw me, threw it up, uttered a shrill +neigh of warning, stepped back a pace, and stood motionless, waiting +apparently for an order from his master--if indeed I ought not rather +to call them friends than master and servant. + +The man looked round, saw me, turned toward me, and showing no sign +that my appearance was unexpected, lifted his hat with a courtesy most +Englishmen would reserve for a lady, and advanced a step, almost as if +to welcome a guest. I may have owed something of this reception to the +fact that he saw before him a man advanced in years, for my beard is +very gray, and that by no means prematurely. I saw before me one +nearly, if not quite as old as myself. His hair and beard, both rather +long, were quite white. His face was wonderfully handsome, with the +stillness of a summer sea upon it. Its features were very marked and +regular and fine, for the habit of the man was rather spare. What with +his white hair and beard, and a certain radiance in his pale +complexion, which, I learned afterward, no sun had ever more than +browned a little, he reminded me for a moment as he turned, of Cato on +the shore of Dante’s purgatorial island. + +“I fear,” I said, “I have intruded!” There was no path where I had +come along. + +The man laughed--and his laugh was more friendly than an invitation to +dinner. + +“The land is mine,” he answered; “no one can say you intrude.” + +“Thank you heartily. I live not very far off, and know the country +pretty well, but have got into a part of which I am ignorant.” + +“You are welcome to go where you will on my property,” he answered. +“I could not close a field without some sense of having thrown a +fellow-being into a dungeon. Whatever be the rights of land, space can +belong to the individual only ‘_as it were_,’ to use a Shakspere-phrase. +All the best things have to be shared. The house plainly was designed +for a family.” + +While he spoke, I scarce heeded his words for looking at the man, so +much he interested me. His face was of the palest health, with a faint +light from within. He looked about sixty years of age. His forehead +was square, and his head rather small, but beautifully modelled; his +eyes were of a light hazel, friendly as those of a celestial +dog. Though slender in build, he looked strong, and every movement +denoted activity. + +I was not ready with an answer to what he said. He turned from me, and +as if to introduce a companion and so render the interview easier, he +called, in tone as gentle as if he spoke to a child, but with that +peculiar intonation that had let me understand it was not to a child +he was speaking, “Memnon! come;” and turned again to me. His movement +and words directed my attention again to the horse, who had stood +motionless. At once, but without sign of haste, the animal walked up +to the rails, rose gently on his hind legs, came over without +touching, walked up to his master, and laid his head on his shoulder. + +I bethought me now who the man was. He had been but a year or two in +the neighbourhood, though the property on which we now stood had been +his own for a good many years. Some said he had bought it; others knew +he had inherited it. All agreed he was a very peculiar person, with +ways so oddly unreasonable that it was evident he had, in his +wanderings over the face of the earth, gradually lost hold of what +sense he might at one time have possessed, and was in consequence a +good deal cracked. There seemed nothing, however, in his behaviour or +appearance to suggest such a conclusion: a man could hardly be counted +beside himself because he was on terms of friendship with his +horse. It took me but a moment to recall his name--Skymer--one odd +enough to assist the memory. I caught it ere he had done mingling +fresh caresses with those of his long-tailed friend. When I came to +know him better, I knew that he had thus given me opportunity--such as +he would to a horse--of thinking whether I should like to know him +better: Mr. Skymer’s way was not to offer himself, but to give easy +opportunity to any who might wish to know him. I learned afterward +that he knew my name and suspected my person: being rather prejudiced +in my favour because of the kind of thing I wrote, he was now waiting +to see whether approximation would follow. + +“Pardon my rude lingering,” I said; “that lovely animal is enough to +make one desire nearer acquaintance with his owner. I don’t think I +ever saw such a perfect creature!” + +I remembered the next moment that I had heard said of Mr. Skymer that +he liked beasts better than men, but I soon found this was only one of +the foolish things constantly said of honest men by those who do not +understand them. + +There are women even who love dogs and dislike children; but, nauseous +fact as this is, it is not so nauseous as the fact that there are men +who believe in no animal rights, or in any God of the animals, and +think we may do what we please with them, indulging at their cost an +insane thirst after knowledge. Injustice may discover facts, but never +truth. + +“I grant him nearly a perfect creature,” he answered, “But he is far +more nearly perfect than you yet know him! Excuse me for speaking so +confidently; but if we were half as far on for men, as Memnon is for a +horse, the kingdom of heaven would be a good deal nearer!” + +“He seems an old horse!” + +“He is an old horse--much older than you can think after seeing him +come over that paling as he did. He is forty.” + +“Is it possible!” + +“I know and can prove his age as certainly as my own. He is the son of +an Arab mare and an English thoroughbred.--Come here, Memnon!” + +The horse, who had been standing behind like a servant in waiting, put +his beautiful head over his master’s shoulder. + +“Memnon,” said Mr. Skymer, “go home and tell Mrs. Waterhouse I hope to +bring a gentleman with me to lunch.” + +The horse walked gently past us, then started at a quick trot, which +almost immediately became a gallop. + +“The dear fellow,” said his master, “would not gallop like that if he +were on the hard road; he knows I would not like it.” + +“But, excuse me, how can the animal convey your message?--how +communicate what he knows, if he does understand what you say to him?” + +“He will at least take care that the housekeeper look in his mane for +the knot which perhaps you did not observe me tie in it.” + +“You have a code of signals by knots then?” + +“Yes--comprising about half a dozen possibilities.--I hope you do not +object to the message I sent! You will do me the honour of lunching +with me?” + +“You are most kind,” I answered--with a little hesitation, I suppose, +fearing to bore my new acquaintance. + +“Don’t make me false to horse and housekeeper, Mr. Gowrie,” he +resumed.--“I put the horse first, because I could more easily explain +the thing to Mrs. Waterhouse than to Memnon.” + +“Could you explain it to Memnon?” + +“I should have a try!” he answered, with a peculiar smile. + +“You hold yourself bound then to keep faith with your horse?” + +“Bound just as with a man--that is, as far as the horse can understand +me. A word understood is binding, whether spoken to horse, or man, or +pig. It makes it the more important that we can do so little, must +work so slowly, for the education of the lower animals. It seems to me +an absolute horror that a man should lie to an inferior creature. Just +think--if an angel were to lie to us! What a shock to find we had been +reposing faith in a devil.” + +“Excuse me--I thought you said _an angel_!” + +“When he lied, would he not be a devil?--But let us follow Memnon, and +as we walk I will tell you more about him.” + +He turned to the wood. + +“The horse,” I said, pointing, “went that way!” + +“Yes,” answered his master; “he knew it was nearer for him to take the +long way round. If I had started him and one of the dogs together, the +horse would have gone that way, and the dog taken the path we are now +following.” + +We walked a score or two of yards in silence. + +“You promised to tell me more about your wonderful horse!” I said. + +“With pleasure. I delight in talking about my poor brothers and +sisters! Most of them are only savages yet, but there would be far +fewer such if we did not treat them as slaves instead of friends. One +day, however, all will be well for them as for us--thank God.” + +“I hope so,” I responded heartily. “But please tell me,” I said, +“something more about your Memnon.” + +Mr. Skymer thought for a moment. + +“Perhaps, after all,” he rejoined, “his best accomplishment is that he +can fetch and carry like a dog. I will tell you one of his feats that +way. But first you must know that, having travelled a good deal, and +in some wild countries, I have picked up things it is well to know, +even if not the best of their kind. A man may fail by not knowing the +second best! I was once out on Memnon, five and twenty miles from +home, when I came to a cottage where I found a woman lying ill. I saw +what was wanted. The country was strange to me, and I could not have +found a doctor. I wrote a little pencil-note, fastened it to the +saddle, and told the horse to go home and bring me what the +housekeeper gave him--and not to spare himself. He went off at a +steady trot of ten or twelve miles an hour. I went into the cottage, +and, awaiting his return, did what I could for the woman. I confess I +felt anxious!” + +“You well might,” I said: “why should you say _confess_?” + +“Because I had no business to be anxious.” + +“It was your business to do all for her you could.” + +“I was doing that! If I hadn’t been, I should have had good cause to +be anxious! But I knew that another was looking after her; and to be +anxious was to meddle with his part!” + +“I see now,” I answered, and said nothing more for some time. + +“What a lather poor Memnon came back in! You should have seen him! He +had been gone nearly five hours, and neither time nor distance +accounted for the state he was in. I did not let him do anything for a +week. I should have had to sit up with him that night, if I had not +been sitting up at any rate. The poor fellow had been caught, and had +made his escape. His bridle was broken, and there were several long +skin wounds in his belly, as if he had scraped the top of a wall set +with bits of glass. How far he had galloped, there was no telling.” + +“Not in vain, I hope! The poor woman?” + +“She recovered. The medicine was all right in a pocket under the flap +of the saddle. Before morning she was much better, and lived many +years after. Memnon and I did not lose sight of her.--But you should +have seen the huge creature lying on the floor of that cabin like a +worn-out dog, abandoned and content! I rubbed him down carefully, as +well as I could, and tied my poncho round him, before I let him go to +sleep. Then as soon as my patient seemed quieted for the night, I made +up a big fire of her peats, and they slept like two babies, only they +both snored.--The woman beat,” he added with a merry laugh. “It was +the first, almost the only time I ever heard a horse snore.--As we +walked home next day he kept steadily behind me. In general we walked +side by side. Either he felt too tired to talk to me, or he was not +satisfied with himself because of something that had happened the day +before. Perhaps he had been careless, and so allowed himself to be +taken. I do not think it likely.” + +“What a loss it will be to you when he dies!” I said. + +He looked grave for an instant, then replied cheerfully-- + +“Of course I shall miss the dear fellow--but not more than he will +miss me; and it will be good for us both.” + +“Then,” said I,--a little startled, I confess, “you really think--” +and there I stopped. + +“Do _you_ think, Mr. Gowrie,” he rejoined, answering my unpropounded +question, “that a God like Jesus Christ, would invent such a delight +for his children as the society and love of animals, and then let +death part them for ever? I don’t.” + +“I am heartily willing to be your disciple in the matter,” I replied. + +“I know well,” he resumed, “the vulgar laugh that serves the poor +public for sufficient answer to anything, and the common-place retort: +‘You can’t give a shadow of proof for your theory!’--to which I +answer, ‘I never was the fool to imagine I could; but as surely as you +go to bed at night expecting to rise again in the morning, so surely +do I expect to see my dear old Memnon again when I wake from what so +many Christians call the sleep that knows no waking.’--Think, +Mr. Gowrie, just think of all the children in heaven--what a +superabounding joy the creatures would be to them!--There is one +class, however,” he went on, “which I should like to see wait a while +before they got their creatures back;--I mean those foolish women who, +for their own pleasure, so spoil their dogs that they make other +people hate them, doing their best to keep them from rising in the +scale of God’s creation.” + +“They don’t know better!” I said. For every time he stopped, I wanted +to hear what he would say next. + +“True,” he answered; “but how much do they want to know the right way +of anything? They have good and lovely instincts--like their dogs, but +do they care that there is a right way and a wrong way of following +them?” + +We walked in silence, and were now coming near the other side of the +small wood. + +“I hope I shall not interfere with your plans for the day!” I said. + +“I seldom have any plans for the day,” he answered. “Or if I have, +they are made to break easily. In general I wait. The hour brings its +plans with it--comes itself to tell me what is wanted of me. It has +done so now. And see, there is Memnon again in attendance on us!” + +There, sure enough, was the horse, on the other side of the paling +that here fenced the wood from a well-kept country-road. His long neck +was stretched over it toward his master. + +“Memnon,” said Mr. Skymer as we issued by the gate, “I want you to +carry this gentleman home.” + +I had often enough in my youth ridden without a saddle, but seldom +indeed without some sort of bridle, however inadequate: I did not, at +the first thought of the thing, relish mounting without one a horse of +which all I knew was that he and his master were on better terms than +I had ever seen man and horse upon before. But even while the thought +was passing through my head, Memnon was lying at my feet, flat as his +equine rotundity would permit. Ashamed of my doubt, I lost not a moment +in placing myself in the position suggested by Sir John Falstaff to +Prince Hal for the defence of his own bulky carcase--astride the body +of the animal, namely. At once he rose and lifted me into the natural +relation of man and horse. Then he looked round at his master, and they +set off at a leisurely pace. + +“You have me captive!” I said. + +“Memnon and I,” answered Mr. Skymer, “will do what we can to make your +captivity pleasant.” + +A silence followed my thanks. In this procession of horse and foot, we +went about half a mile ere anything more was said worth setting +down. Then began evidence that we were drawing nigh to a house: the +grassy lane between hedges in which we had been moving, was gradually +changing its character. First came trees in the hedge-rows. Then the +hedges gave way to trees--a grand avenue of splendid elms and beeches +alternated. The ground under our feet was the loveliest sward, and +between us and the sun came the sweetest shadow. A glad heave but +instant subsidence of the live power under me, let me know Memnon’s +delight at feeling the soft elastic turf under his feet: he had said +to himself, “Now we shall have a gallop!” but immediately checked the +thought with the reflection that he was no longer a colt ignorant of +manners. + +“What a lovely road the turf makes!” I said. “It is a lower +sky--solidified for feet that are not yet angelic.” + +My host looked up with a brighter smile than he had shown before. + +“It is the only kind of road I really like,” he said, “--though turf +has its disadvantages! I have as much of it about the place as it will +bear. Such roads won’t do for carriages!” + +“You ride a good deal, I suppose?” + +“I do. I was at one time so accustomed to horseback that, without +thinking, I was not aware whether I was on my horse’s feet or my own.” + +“Where, may I ask, does my friend who is now doing me the favour to +carry ‘this weight and size,’ come from?” + +“He was born in England, but his mother was a Syrian--of one of the +oldest breeds there known. He was born into my arms, and for a week +never touched the ground. Next month, as I think I mentioned, he will +be forty years old!” + +“It is a great age for a horse!” I said. + +“The more the shame as well as the pity!” he answered. + +“Then you think horses might live longer?” + +“Much longer than they are allowed to live in this country,” he +answered. “And a part of our punishment is that we do not know them. We +treat them so selfishly that they do not live long enough to become our +friends. At present there are but few men worthy of their friendship. +What else is a man’s admiration, when it is without love or respect or +justice, but a bitter form of despite! It is small wonder there should +be so many stupid horses, when they receive so little education, have +such bad associates, and die so much too young to have gained any ripe +experience to transmit to their posterity. Where would humanity be now, +if we all went before five-and-twenty?” + +“I think you must be right. I have myself in my possession at this +moment, given me by one who loved her, an ink-stand made from the hoof +of a pony that died at the age of at least forty-two, and did her part +of the work of a pair till within a year or two of her death.--Poor +little Zephyr!” + +“Why, Mr. Gowrie, you talk of her as if she were a Christian!” +exclaimed Mr. Skymer. + +“That’s how you talked of Memnon a moment ago! Where is the +difference? Not in the size, though Memnon would make three of +Zephyr!” + +“I didn’t say _poor Memnon_, did I? You said _poor Zephyr_! That is +the way Christians talk about their friends gone home to the grand old +family mansion! Why they do, they would hardly like one to tell them!” + +“It is true,” I responded. “I understand you now! I don’t think I ever +heard a widow speak of her departed husband without putting _poor_, or +_poor dear_, before his name.--By the way, when you hear a woman speak +of her _late_ husband, can you help thinking her ready to marry +again?” + +“It does sound as if she had done with him! But here we are at the +gate!--Call, Memnon.” + +The horse gave a clear whinny, gentle, but loud enough to be heard at +some distance. It was a tall gate of wrought iron, but Memnon’s +summons was answered by one who could clear it--though not open it any +more than he: a little bird, which I was not ornithologist enough to +recognize--mainly because of my short-sightedness, I hope--came +fluttering from the long avenue within, perched on the top of the +gate, looked down at our party for a moment as if debating the +prudent, dropped suddenly on Memnon’s left ear, and thence to his +master’s shoulder, where he sat till the gate was opened. The little +one went half-way up the inner avenue with us, making several flights +and returns before he left us. + +The boy that opened the gate, a chubby little fellow of seven, looked +up in Mr. Skymer’s face as if he had been his father and king in one, +and stood gazing after him as long as he was in sight. I noticed +also--who could have failed to notice?--that every now and then a bird +would drop from the tree we were passing under, and alight for a +minute on my host’s head. Once when he happened to uncover it, seven +or eight perched together upon it. One tiny bird got caught in his +beard by the claws. + +“You cannot surely have tamed _all_ the birds in your grounds!” I +said. + +“If I have,” he answered, “it has been by permitting them to be +themselves.” + +“You mean it is the nature of birds to be friendly with man?” + +“I do. Through long ages men have been their enemies, and so have +alienated them--they too not being themselves.” + +“You mean that unfriendliness is not natural to men?” + +“It cannot be human to be cruel!” + +“How is it, then, that so many boys are careless what suffering they +inflict?” + +“Because they have in them the blood of men who loved cruelty, and +never repented of it.” + +“But how do you account for those men loving cruelty--for their being +what you say is contrary to their nature?” + +“Ah, if I could account for that, I should be at the secret of most +things! All I meant to half-explain was, how it came that so many who +have no wish to inflict suffering, yet are careless of inflicting it.” + +I saw that we must know each other better before he would quite open +his mind to me. I saw that though, hospitable of heart, he threw his +best rooms open to all, there were others in his house into which he +did not invite every acquaintance. + +The avenue led to a wide gravelled space before a plain, low, long +building in whitish stone, with pillared portico. In the middle of the +space was a fountain, and close to it a few chairs. Mr. Skymer begged +me to be seated. Memnon walked up to the fountain, and lay down, that +I might get off his back as easily as I had got on it. Once down, he +turned on his side, and lay still. + +“The air is so mild,” said my host, “I fancy you will prefer this to +the house.” + +“Mild!” I rejoined; “I should call it hot!” + +“I have been so much in real heat!” he returned. “Notwithstanding my +love of turf, I keep this much in gravel for the sake of the desert.” + +I took the seat he offered me, wondering whether Memnon was +comfortable where he lay; and, absorbed in the horse, did not see my +host go to the other side of the basin. Suddenly we were “clothed +upon” with a house which, though it came indeed from the earth, might +well have come direct from heaven: a great uprush of water spread +above us a tent-like dome, through which the sun came with a cool, +broken, almost frosty glitter. We seemed in the heart of a huge +soap-bubble. I exclaimed with delight. + +“I thought you would enjoy my sun-shade!” said Mr. Skymer. “Memnon and +I often come here of a hot morning, when nobody wants us. Don’t we, +Memnon?” + +The horse lifted his nose a little, and made a low soft noise, a chord +of mingled obedience and delight--a moan of pleasure mixed with a +half-born whinny. + +We had not been seated many moments, and had scarcely pushed off the +shore of silence into a new sea of talk, when we were interrupted by +the invasion of half a dozen dogs. They were of all sorts down to no +sort. Mr. Skymer called one of them Tadpole--I suppose because he had +the hugest tail, while his legs were not visible without being looked +for. + +“That animal,” said his master, “--he looks like a dog, but who would +be positive what he was!--is the cleverest in the pack. He seems to me +a rare individuality. His ancestors must have been of all sorts, and +he has gathered from them every good quality possessed by each. Think +what a man might be--made up that way!” + +“Why is there no such man?” I said. + +“There may be some such men. There must be many one day,” he answered, +“--but not for a while yet. Men must first be made willing to be +noble.” + +“And you don’t think men willing to be made noble?” + +“Oh yes! willing enough, some of them, to be _made_ noble!” + +“I do not understand. I thought you said they were not!” + +“They are willing enough _to be made_ noble; but that is very +different from being willing _to be_ noble: that takes trouble. How +can any one become noble who desires it so little as not to fight for +it!” + +The man drew me more and more. He had a way of talking about things +seldom mentioned except in dull fashion in the pulpit, as if he cared +about them. He spoke as of familiar things, but made you feel he was +looking out of a high window. There are many who never speak of real +things except in a false tone; this man spoke of such without an atom +of assumed solemnity--in his ordinary voice: they came into his mind +as to their home--not as dreams of the night, but as facts of the day. + +I sat for a while, gazing up through the thin veil of water at the +blue sky so far beyond. I thought how like that veil was to our little +life here, overdomed by that boundless foreshortening of space. The +lines in Shelley’s _Adonais_ came to me: + + “Life, like a dome of many-coloured glass, + Stains the white radiance of Eternity, + Until Death tramples it to fragments.” + +Then I thought of what my host had said concerning the too short lives +of horses, and wondered what he would say about those of dogs. + +“Dogs are more intelligent than horses,” I said: “why do they live a +yet shorter time?” + +“I doubt if you would say so in an Arab’s tent,” he returned. “If you +had said, ‘still more affectionate,’ I should have known better how to +answer you.” + +“Then I do say so,” I replied. + +“And I return, that is just why they live no longer. They do not find +the world good enough for them, die, and leave it.” + +“They have a much happier life than horses!” + +“Many dogs than some horses, I grant.” + +That instant arose what I fancied must be an unusual sound in the +place: two of the dogs were fighting. The master got up. I thought +with myself, “Now we shall see his notions of discipline!” nor had I +long to wait. In his hand was a small riding-whip, which I afterward +found he always carried in avoidance of having to inflict a heavier +punishment from inability to inflict a lighter; for he held that, in +all wrong-doing man can deal with, the kindest thing is not only to +punish, but, with animals especially, to punish at once. He ran to the +conflicting parties. They separated the moment they heard the sound of +his coming. One came cringing and crawling to his feet; the other--it +was the nondescript Tadpole--stood a little way off, wagging his tail, +and cocking his head up in his master’s face. He gave the one at his +feet several pretty severe cuts with the whip, and sent him off. The +other drew nearer. His master turned away and took no notice of him. + +“May I ask,” I said, when he returned to his seat, “why you did not +punish both the animals for their breach of the peace?” + +“They did not both deserve it.” + +“How could you tell that? You were not looking when the quarrel +began!” + +“Ah, but you see I know the dogs! One of them--I saw at a glance how +it was--had found a bone, and dog-rule about finding is, that what you +find is yours. The other, notwithstanding, wanted a share. It was +Tadpole who found the bone, and he--partly from his sense of +justice--cannot endure to have his claims infringed upon. Every dog of +them knows that Tadpole must be in the right.” + +“He looked as if he expected you to approve of his conduct!” + +“Yes, that is the worst of Tadpole! he is so self-righteous as to +imagine he deserves praise for standing on his rights! He is but a +dog, you see, and knows no better!” + +“I noticed you disregarded his appeal.” + +“I was not going to praise him for nothing!” + +“You expect them to understand your treatment?” + +“No one can tell how infinitesimally small the beginnings of +understanding, as of life, may be. The only way to make animals +reasonable--more reasonable, I mean--is to treat them as +reasonable. Until you can go down into the abysses of creation, you +cannot know when a nature begins to see a difference in quality +of action.” + +“I confess,” I said, “Mr. Tadpole did seem a little ashamed as he went +away.” + +“And you see Blanco White at my feet, taking care not to touch +them. He is giving time, he thinks, for my anger to pass.” + +He laughed the merriest laugh. The dog looked up eagerly, but dropped +his head again. + +If I go on like this, however, I shall have to take another book to +tell the story for which I began the present! In short, I was drawn to +the man as never to another since the friend of my youth went where I +shall go to seek and find him one day--or, more likely, one solemn +night. I was greatly his inferior, but love is a quick divider of +shares: he that gathers much has nothing over, and he that gathers +little has no lack. I soon ceased to think of him as my _new_ friend, +for I seemed to have known him before I was born. + +I am going to tell the early part of his history. If only I could tell +it as it deserves to be told! The most interesting story may be so +narrated as that only the eyes of a Shakspere could spy the shine +underneath its dull surface. + +He never told me any great portion of the tale of his life +continuously. One thing would suggest another--generally with no +connection in time. I have pieced the parts together myself. He did +indeed set out more than once or twice to give me his history, but +always we got discussing something, and so it was interrupted. + +I will not write what I have set in order as if he were himself +narrating: the most modest man in the world would that way be put at a +disadvantage. The constant recurrence of the capital _I_, is apt to +rouse in the mind of the reader, especially if he be himself +egotistic, more or less of irritation at the egotism of the +narrator--while in reality the freedom of a man’s personal utterance +_may_ be owing to his lack of the egotistic. Partly for my +friend’s sake, therefore, I shall tell the story as--what indeed it +is--a narrative of my own concerning him. + + + + + Chapter II. + + WITH HIS PARENTS. + + +The lingering, long-drawn-out _table d’hôte_ dinner was just over in +one of the inns on the _cornice_ road. The gentlemen had gone into the +garden, and some of the ladies to the _salotto_, where open windows +admitted the odours of many a flower and blossoming tree, for it was +toward the end of spring in that region. One had sat down to a +tinkling piano, and was striking a few chords, more to her own +pleasure than that of the company. Two or three were looking out into +the garden, where the diaphanous veil of twilight had so speedily +thickened to the crape of night, its darkness filled with thousands of +small isolated splendours--fire-flies, those “golden boats” never seen +“on a sunny sea,” but haunting the eves of the young summer, pulsing, +pulsing through the dusky air with seeming aimlessness, like sweet +thoughts that have no faith to bind them in one. A tall, graceful +woman stood in one of the windows alone. She had never been in Italy +before, had never before seen fire-flies, and was absorbed in the +beauty of their motion as much as in that of their golden +flashes. Each roving star had a tide in its light that rose and ebbed +as it moved, so that it seemed to push itself on by its own radiance, +ever waxing and waning. In wide, complicated dance, they wove a huge, +warpless tapestry with the weft of an ever vanishing aureate +shine. The lady, an Englishwoman evidently, gave a little sigh and +looked round, regretting, apparently, that her husband was not by her +side to look on the loveliness that woke a faint-hued fairy-tale in +her heart. The same moment he entered the room and came to her. He was +a man above the middle height, and from the slenderness of his figure, +looked taller than he was. He had a vivacity of motion, a readiness to +turn on his heel, a free swing of the shoulders, and an erect carriage +of the head, which all marked him a man of action: one that speculated +on his calling would immediately have had his sense of fitness +satisfied when he heard that he was the commander of an English +gun-boat, which he was now on his way to Genoa to join. He was +young--within the twenties, though looking two or three and thirty, +his face was so browned by sun and wind. His features were regular and +attractive, his eyes so dark that the liveliness of their movement +seemed hardly in accord with the weight of their colour. His wife was +very fair, with large eyes of the deepest blue of eyes. She looked +delicate, and was very lovely. They had been married about five +years. A friend had brought them in his yacht as far as Nice, and they +were now going on by land. From Genoa the lady must find her way home +without her husband. + +The lights in the room having been extinguished that the few present +might better see the fire-flies, he put his arm round her waist. + +“I’m so glad you’re come, Henry!” she said, favoured by the piano. “I +was uncomfortable at having the lovely sight all to myself!” + +“It is lovely, darling!” he rejoined; then, after a moment’s pause, +added, “I hope you will be able to sleep without the sea to rock you!” + +“No fear of that!” she answered. “The stillness will be delightful. I +was thoroughly reconciled to the motion of the yacht,” she went on, +“but there is a satisfaction in feeling the solid earth under you, and +knowing it will keep steady all night.” + +“I am glad you like the change. I never sleep the first night on +shore.--I cannot tell what it is, but somehow I keep wishing Fyvie +could have taken us all the way.” + +“Never mind, love. I will keep awake with you.” + +“It’s not that! How could I mind lying awake with you beside me! Oh +Grace, you don’t know, you cannot know, what you are to me! I don’t +feel in the least that you’re my other half, as people say. You’re not +like a part of myself at all; to think so would be sacrilege! You are +quite another, else how could you be mine! You make me forget myself +altogether. When I look at you, I stand before an enchanted mirror +that cannot show what is in front of it.” + +“No, Harry; I’m a true mirror, for I hold that inside me which remains +outside me.” + +“I fear you’ve got beyond me!” said her husband, laughing. “You always +do!” + +“Yes, at nonsense, Harry.” + +“Then your speech was nonsense, was it?” + +“No; it was full of sense. But think of something you would like me to +say; I must fetch the boy to see the fire-flies; when I come back I +will say it.” + +She left the room. Her husband stood where he was, gazing out, with a +tender look in his face that deepened to sadness--whether from the +haunting thought of his wife’s delicate health and his having to leave +her, or from some strange foreboding, I cannot tell. When presently +she returned with their one child in her arms, he made haste to take +him from her. + +“My darling,” he said, “he is much too heavy for you! How stupid of me +not to think of it! If you don’t promise me never to do that at home, +I will take him to sea with me!” + +The child, a fair, bright boy, the sleep in whose eyes had turned to +wonder, for they seemed to see everything, and be quite satisfied with +nothing, went readily to his father, but looked back at his +mother. The only sign he gave that he was delighted with the +fire-flies was, that he looked now to the one, now to the other of his +parents, speechless, with shining eyes. He knew they were feeling just +like himself. Silent communion was enough. + +The father turned to carry him back to bed. The mother turned to look +after them. As she did so, her eyes fell upon two or three delicate, +small-leaved plants--I do not know what they were--that stood in pots +on the balcony in front of the open window: they were shivering. The +night was perfectly still, but their leaves trembled as with an +ague-fit. + +“Look, Harry! What is that?” she cried, pointing to them. + +He turned and looked, said it must be some loaded wagon passing, and +went off with the child. + +“I hope to-morrow will be just like to-day!” said his wife when he +returned. “What shall we do with it?--our one real holiday, you know!” + +“I have a notion in my head,” he answered. “That little town Georgina +spoke of, is not far from here--among the hills: shall we go and see +it?” + + + + +Chapter III. + +WITHOUT HIS PARENTS. + + +The sun in England seems to shine because he cannot help it; the sun +in Italy seems to shine because he means it, and wants to mean +it. Thus he shone the next morning, including in his attentions a +curious little couple, husband and wife, who, attended by a guide, and +borne by animals which might be mules and might be donkeys, and were +not lovely to look on except through sympathy with their ugliness, +were slowly ascending a steep terraced and zigzagged road, with olive +trees above and below them. They were on the south side of the hill, +and the olives gave them none of the little shadow they have in their +power, for the trees next the sun were always below the road. The man +often wiped his red, innocent face, and looked not a little +distressed; but the lady, although as stout as he, did not seem to +suffer, perhaps because she was sheltered by a very large bonnet. After +a silence of a good many minutes, she was the first to speak. + +“I can’t say but I’m disappointed in the olives, Thomas,” she +remarked. “They ain’t much to keep the sun off you!” + +“They wouldn’t look bad along a brookside in Essex!” returned her +husband. “Here they do seem a bit out of place!” + +“Well, but, poor things! how are they to help it--with only a trayful +of earth under their feet! If you planted a priest on a terrace he +would soon be as thin as they!” + +They had just passed a very stout priest, in a low broad hat, and +cassock, and she laughed merrily at her small joke. They were an +English country parson and his wife, abroad for the first time in +their now middle-aged lives, and happy as children just out of +school. Incapable of disliking anybody, there was no unkindness in +Mrs. Porson’s laughter. + +“I don’t see,” she resumed, “how they ever can have a picnic in such a +country!” + +“Why not?” + +“There’s no place to sit down!” + +“Here’s a whole hill-side!” + +“But so hard!” she answered. “There’s not an inch of turf or grass in +any direction!” + +The pair--equally plump, and equally good-natured--laughed together. + +I need not give more of their talk. It was better than most talk, yet +not worth recording. Their guide, perceiving that they knew no more of +Italian than he did of English, had withdrawn to the rear, and stumped +along behind them all the way, holding much converse with his donkeys, +however, admonishing now this one, now that one, and seeming not a +little hurt with their behaviour, to judge from the expostulations +that accompanied his occasionally more potent arguments. Assuredly the +speed they made was small; but it was a festa, and hot. + +They were on the way to a small town some distance from the shore, on +the crest of the hill they were now ascending. It would, from the +number of its inhabitants, have been in England a village, but there +are no villages in the Riviera. However insignificant a place may be, +it is none the less a town, possibly a walled town. Somebody had told +Mr. and Mrs. Porson they ought to visit Graffiacane, and to +Graffiacane they were therefore bound: why they ought to visit it, and +what was to be seen there, they took the readiest way to know. + +The place was indeed a curious one, high among the hills, and on the +top of its own hill, with approaches to it like the trenches of a +siege. All the old towns in that region seem to have climbed up to +look over the heads of other things. Graffiacane saw over hills and +valleys and many another town--each with its church standing highest, +the guardian of the flock of houses beneath it; saw over many a +water-course, mostly dry, with lovely oleanders growing in the middle +of it; saw over multitudinous oliveyards and vineyards; saw over mills +with great wheels, and little ribbons of water to drive them--running +sometimes along the tops of walls to get at their work; saw over +rugged pines, and ugly, verdureless, raw hillsides--away to the sea, +lying in the heat like a heavenly vat in which all the tails of all +the peacocks God was making, lay steeped in their proper dye. Numerous +were the sharp turns the donkeys made in their ascent; and at this +corner and that, the sweetest life-giving wind would leap out upon the +travellers, as if it had been lying there in wait to surprise them +with the heavenliest the old earth, young for all her years, could +give them. But they were getting too tired to enjoy anything, and were +both indeed not far from asleep on the backs of their humble beasts, +when a sudden, more determined yet more cheerful assault of their +guide upon his donkeys, roused both them and their riders; and looking +sleepily up, with his loud _heeoop_ ringing in their ears, and a sense +of the insidious approach of two headaches, they saw before them the +little town, its houses gathered close for protection, like a brood of +chickens, and the white steeple of the church rising above them, like +the neck of the love-valiant hen. + +Passing through the narrow arch of the low-browed gateway, hot as was +the hour, a sudden cold struck to their bones. For not a ray of light +shone into the narrow street. The houses were lofty as those of a +city, and parted so little by the width of the street that friends on +opposite sides might almost from their windows have shaken +hands. Narrow, rough, steep old stone-stairs ran up between and inside +the houses, all the doors of which were open to the air--here, +however, none of the sweetest. Everywhere was shadow; everywhere, one +or another evil odour; everywhere a look of abject and dirty +poverty--to an English eye, that is. Everywhere were pretty children, +young, slatternly mothers, withered-up grandmothers, the gleam of +glowing reds and yellows, and the coolness of subdued greens and fine +blues. Such at least was the composite first impression made on Mr. +and Mrs. Porson. As it was a festa, more men than usual were looking +out of cavern-like doorways or over hand-wrought iron balconies, were +leaning their backs against door-posts, and smoking as if too lazy to +stop. Many of the women were at prayers in the church. All was +orderly, and quieter than usual for a festa. None could have told the +reason; the townsfolk were hardly aware that an undefinable oppression +was upon them--an oppression that lay also upon their visitors, and +the donkeys that had toiled with them up the hills and slow-climbing +valleys. + +It added to the gloom and consequent humidity of the town that the +sides of the streets were connected, at the height of two or perhaps +three stories, by thin arches--mere jets of stone from the one house +to the other, with but in rare instance the smallest superstructure to +keep down the key of the arch. Whatever the intention of them, they +might seem to serve it, for the time they had straddled there +undisturbed had sufficed for moss and even grass to grow upon those +which Mr. Porson now regarded with curious speculation. A bit of an +architect, and foiled, he summoned at last what Italian he could, +supplemented it with Latin and a terminational _o_ or _a_ tacked to +any French or English word that offered help, and succeeded, as he +believed, in gathering from a by-stander, that the arches were there +because of the earthquakes. + +He had not language enough of any sort to pursue the matter, else he +would have asked his informant how the arch they were looking at could +be of any service, seeing it had no weight on the top, and but a +slight endlong pressure must burst it up. Turning away to tell his +wife what he had learned, he was checked by a low rumbling, like +distant thunder, which he took for the firing of festa guns, having +discovered that Italians were fond of all kinds of noises. The next +instant they felt the ground under their feet move up and down and +from side to side with confused motion. A sudden great cry arose. One +moment and down every stair, out of every door, like animals from +their holes, came men, women, and children, with a rush. The +earthquake was upon them. + +But in such narrow streets, the danger could hardly be less than +inside the houses, some of which, the older especially, were ill +constructed--mostly with boulder-stones that had neither angles nor +edges, hence little grasp on each other beyond what the friction of +their weight, and the adhesion of their poor old friable cement, gave +them; for the Italians, with a genius for building, are careless of +certain constructive essentials. After about twenty seconds of +shaking, the lonely pair began to hear, through the noise of the cries +of the people, some such houses as these rumbling to the earth. + +They were far more bewildered than frightened. They were both of good +nerve, and did not know the degree of danger they were in, while the +strangeness of the thing contributed to an excitement that helped +their courage. I cannot say how they might have behaved in an hotel +full of their countrymen and countrywomen, running and shrieking, and +altogether comporting themselves as if they knew there was no God. The +fear on all sides might there have infected them; but the terror of +the inhabitants who knew better than they what the thing meant, did +not much shake them. For one moment many of the people stood in the +street motionless, pale, and staring; the next they all began to run, +some for the gateway, but the greater part up the street, staggering +as they ran. The movement of the ground was indeed small--not more, +perhaps, than half an inch in any direction--but fear and imagination +weakened all their limbs. They had not run far, however, before the +terrible unrest ceased as suddenly as it had begun. + +The English pair drew a long breath where they stood--for they had not +stirred a step, or indeed thought whither to run--and imagining it +over for a hundred years, looked around them. Their guide had +disappeared. The two donkeys stood perfectly still with their heads +hanging down. They seemed in deep dejection, and incapable of +movement. A few men only were yet to be seen. They were running up the +street. In a moment more it would be empty. They were the last of +those that had let the women go to church without them. They were +hurrying to join them in the sanctuary, the one safe place: the rest +of the town might be shaken in heaps on its foundations, but the +church would stand! Guessing their goal, the Porsons followed +them. But they were neither of a build nor in a condition to make +haste, and the road was uphill. No one place, however, was far from +another within the toy-town, and they came presently to an open +_piazza_, on the upper side of which rose the great church. It had a +square front, masking with its squareness the triangular gable of the +building. Upon this screen, in the brightest of colours, magenta and +sky-blue predominating, was represented the day of judgment--the +mother seated on the right hand of the judge, and casting a pitiful +look upon the miserable assembly on her left. The square was a good +deal on the slope, and as they went slowly up to the church, they kept +looking at the picture. The last tatters of the skirt of the crowd had +disappeared through the great door, and but for themselves the square +was empty. All at once the picture at which they were gazing, the +spread of wall on which it was painted, the whole bulk of the huge +building began to shudder, and went on shuddering--“just,” Mr. Porson +used to say when describing the thing to a friend, “like the skin of a +horse determined to get rid of a gad-fly.” The same moment the tiles +on the roof began to clatter like so many castanets in the hands of +giants, and the ground to wriggle and heave. But they were too much +absorbed in what was before their eyes to heed much what went on under +their feet. The oscillatory displacement of the front of the church +did not at most seem to cover more than a hand-breadth, but it was +enough. Down came the plaster surface, with the judge and his mother, +clashing on the pavement below, while the good and the bad yet stood +trembling. A few of the people came running out, thinking the open +square after all safer than the church, but there was no rush to the +open air. The shaking had lasted about twenty seconds, or at most half +a minute, when, without indication to the eyes watching the front, +there came a roaring crash and a huge rumbling, through and far above +which, rose a multitudinous shriek of terror, dismay, and agony, and a +number of men and women issued as if shot from a catapult. Then a few +came straggling out, and then--no more. The roof had fallen upon the +rest. + +With the first rush from the church, the shaking ceased utterly, and +the still earth seemed again the immovable thing the English +spectators had conceived her. Of what had taken place there was little +sign on the earth, no sign in the blue sun-glorious heaven; only in +the air there was a cloud of dust so thick as to look almost solid, +and from the cloud, as it seemed, came a ghastly cry, mingled of +shrieks and groans and articulate appeals for help. The cry kept on +issuing, while the calm front of the church, dominated by that +frightful canopy, went on displaying the assembled nations delivered +from their awful judge. While the multitude groaned within, it spread +itself out to the sun in silent composure, welcoming and cherishing +his rays in what was left of its gorgeous hues. + +The Porsons stood for a moment stunned, came to their senses, and made +haste to enter the building. With white faces and trembling hands, +they drew aside the heavy leather curtain that hung within the great +door, but could for a moment see nothing; the air inside seemed filled +with a solid yellow dust. As their eyes recovered from the sudden +change of sunlight for gloom, however, they began to distinguish the +larger outlines, and perceived that the floor was one confused heap of +rafters and bricks and tiles and stones and lime. The centre of the +roof had been a great dome; now there was nothing between their eyes +and the clear heaven but the slowly vanishing cloud of ruin. In the +mound below they could at first distinguish nothing human--could not +have told, in the dim chaos, limbs from broken rafters. Eager to help, +they dared not set their feet upon the mass--not that they feared the +walls which another shock might bring upon their heads, but that they +shuddered lest their own added weight should crush some live human +creature they could not descry. Three or four who had received little +or no hurt, were moving about the edges of the heap, vaguely trying to +lift now this, now that, but yielding each attempt in despair, either +from its evident uselessness, or for lack of energy. They would give a +pull at a beam that lay across some writhing figure, find it +immovable, and turn with a groan to some farther cry. How or where +were they to help? Others began to come in with white faces and +terror-stricken eyes; and before long the sepulchral ruin had little +groups all over it, endeavouring in shiftless fashion to bring rescue +to the prisoned souls. + +The Porsons saw nothing they could do. Great beams and rafters which +it was beyond their power to move an inch, lay crossed in all +directions; and they could hold little communication with those who +were in a fashion at work. Alas, they were little better than vainly +busy, while the louder moans accompanying their attempts revealed that +they added to the tortures of those they sought to deliver! The two +saw more plainly now, and could distinguish contorted limbs, and here +and there a countenance. The silence, more and more seldom broken, was +growing itself terrible. Had they known how many were buried there, +they would have wondered so few were left able to cry out. At moments +there was absolute stillness in the dreadful place. The heart of +Mrs. Porson began to sink. + +“Do come out,” she whispered, afraid of her own voice. “I feel so sick +and faint, I fear I shall drop.” + +As she spoke something touched her leg. She gave a cry and started +aside. It was a hand, but of the body to which it belonged nothing +could be seen. It must have been its last movement; now it stuck there +motionless. Then they spied amid sad sights a sadder still. Upon the +heap, a little way from its edge, sat a child of about three, dressed +like a sailor, gazing down at something--they could not see +what. Going a little nearer, they saw it--the face of a fair woman, +evidently English, who lay dead, with a great beam across her +heart. The child showed no trace of tears; his white face seemed +frozen. The stillness upon it was not despair, but suggested a world +in which hope had never yet been born. Pity drove Mrs. Porson’s +sickness away. + +[Illustration: MRS. PORSON FINDS CLARE BY THE SIDE OF HIS DEAD MOTHER.] + +“My dear!” she said; but the child took no heed. Her voice, however, +seemed to wake something in him. He started to his feet, and rushing +at the beam, began to tug at it with his tiny hands. Mrs. Porson burst +into tears. + +“It’s no use, darling!” she cried. + +“Wake mamma!” he said, turning, and looking up at her. + +“She will not wake,” sobbed Mrs. Porson. + +Her husband stood by speechless, choking back the tears of which, +being an Englishman, he was ashamed. + +“She _will_ wake,” returned the boy. “She always wakes when I kiss +her.” + +He knelt beside her, to prove upon her white face the efficacy of the +measure he had never until now known to fail. That he had already +tried it was plain, for he had kissed away much of the dust, though +none of the death. When once more he found that she did not even close +her lips to return his passionate salute, he desisted. With that +saddest of things, a child’s sigh, and a look that seemed to Mrs. +Porson to embody the riddle of humanity, he reseated himself on the +beam, with his little feet on his mother’s bosom, where so often she +had made them warm. He did not weep; he did not fix his eyes on his +mother; his look was level and moveless and set upon nothing. He +seemed to have before him an utter blank--as if the outer wall of +creation had risen frowning in front, and he knew there was nothing +behind it but chaos. + +“Where is your papa?” asked Mr. Porson. + +The boy looked round bewildered. + +“Gone,” he answered; nor could they get anything more from him. + +“Was your papa with you here?” asked Mrs. Porson. + +He answered only with the word _Gone_, uttered in a dazed fashion. + +By this time all the men left in the town were doing their best, under +the direction of an intelligent man, the priest of a neighbouring +parish. They had already got one or two out alive, and their own +priest dead. They worked well, their terror of the lurking earthquake +forgotten in their eagerness to rescue. From their ignorance of the +language, however, Mr. Porson saw they could be of little use; and in +dread of doing more harm than good, he judged it better to go. + +They stood one moment and looked at each other in silence. The child +had dropped from the beam, and lay fast asleep across his mother’s +bosom, with his head on a lump of mortar. Without a word spoken, +Mrs. Porson, picking her way carefully to the spot, knelt down by the +dead mother, tenderly kissed her cheek, lifted the sleeping child, and +with all the awe, and nearly all the tremulous joy of first +motherhood, bore him to her husband. The throes of the earthquake had +slain the parents, and given the child into their arms. Without look +of consultation, mark of difference, or sign of agreement, they turned +in silence and left the terrible church, with the clear summer sky +looking in upon its dead. + +As they passed the door, the sun met them, shining with all his +might. The sea, far away across the tops of hills and the clefts of +valleys, lay basking in his glory. The hot air quivered all over the +wide landscape. From the flight of steps in front of the church they +looked down on the streets of the town, and beyond them into space. It +looked the best of all possible worlds--as neither plague, famine, +pestilence, earthquakes, nor human wrongs, persuade me it is not, +judged by the high intent of its existence. When a man knows that +intent, as I dare to think I do, _then_ let him say, and not till +then, whether it be a good world or not. That in the midst of the +splendour of the sunny day, in the midst of olives and oranges, grapes +and figs, ripening swiftly by the fervour of the circumambient air, +should lie that charnel-church, is a terrible fact, neither to be +ignored, nor to be explained by the paltry theory of the greatest good +to the greatest number; but the end of the maker’s dream is not this. + +When they turned into the street that led to the gate, they found the +donkeys standing where they had left them. Their owner was not with +them. He had gone into the church with the rest, and was killed. When +they caught sight of the patient, dejected animals, unheeded and +unheeding, then first they spoke, whispering in the awful stillness of +the world: they must take the creatures, and make the best of their +way back without a guide! They judged that, as the road was chiefly +down hill, and the donkeys would be going home, they would not have +much difficulty with them. At the worst, short and stout as they were, +they were not bad walkers, and felt more than equal to carrying the +child between them. Not a person was in the street when they mounted; +almost all were in the church, at its strange, terrible service. Mrs. +Porson mounted the strongest of the animals, her husband placed the +sleeping child in her arms, and they started, he on foot by the side +of his wife, and his donkey following. No one saw them pass through +the gate of the town. + +They were not sure of the way, for they had been partly asleep as they +came, but so long as they went downward, and did not leave the road, +they could hardly go wrong! The child slept all the way. + + + + + Chapter IV. + + THE NEW FAMILY. + + +How shall a man describe what passed in the mind of a childless wife, +with a motherless boy in her arms! It is the loveliest provision, +doubtless, that every child should have a mother of his own; but there +is a mother-love--which I had almost called more divine--the love, +namely, that a woman bears to a child because he is a child, +regardless of whether he be her own or another’s. It is that they may +learn to love thus, that women have children. Some women love so +without having any. No conceivable treasure of the world could have +once entered into comparison with the burden of richness Mrs. Porson +bore. She told afterward, with voice hushed by fear of irreverence, +how, as they went down one of the hills, she slept for a moment, and +dreamed that she was Mary with the holy thing in her arms, fleeing to +Egypt on the ass, with Joseph, her husband, walking by her side. For +years and years they had been longing for a child--and here lay the +divinest little one, with every mark of the kingdom upon him! His +father and mother lying crushed under the fallen dome of that fearful +church, was it strange he should seem to belong to her? + +But there might be some one somewhere in the world with a better +claim; possibly--horrible thought!--with more need of him than she! Up +started a hideous cupidity, a fierce temptation to dishonesty, such as +she had never imagined. We do not know what is in us until the +temptation comes. Then there is the devil to fight. And Mrs. Porson +fought him. + +Mr. Porson was, in a milder degree, affected much as his wife. He +could not help wishing, nor was he wrong in wishing, that, since the +child’s father and mother were gone, they might take their place, and +love their orphan. They were far from rich, but what was one child! +They might surely manage to give him a good education, and set him +doing for himself! But, alas, there might be others--others with +love-property in the child! The same thoughts were working in each, +but neither dared utter them in the presence of the sleeping treasure. + +As they descended the last slope above the town, with the wide +sea-horizon before them, they beheld such a glory of after-sunset as, +even on that coast, was unusual. A chord of colour that might have +been the prostrate fragment of a gigantic rainbow, lay along a large +arc of the horizon. The farther portion of the sea was an indigo blue, +save for a grayish line that parted it from the dusky red of the +sky. This red faded up through orange and dingy yellow to a pale green +and pale blue, above which came the depth of the blue night, in which +rayed resplendent the evening star. Below the star and nearer to the +west, lay, very thin and very long, the sickle of the new moon. If +death be what it looks to the unthinking soul, and if the heavens +declare the glory of God, as they do indeed to the heart that knows +him, then is there discord between heaven and earth such as no +argument can harmonize. But death is not what men think it, for +“Blessed are they that mourn for the dead.” + +The sight enhanced the wonder and hope of the two honest good souls in +the treasure they carried. Out of the bosom of the skeleton Death +himself, had been given them--into their very arms--a germ of life, a +jewel of heaven! At the thought of what lay up the hill behind them, +they felt their joy in the child almost wicked; but if God had taken +the child’s father and mother, might they not be glad in the hope that +he had chosen them to replace them? That he had for the moment at +least, they were bound to believe! + +They travelled slowly on, through the dying sunset, and an hour or two +of the star-bright night that followed, adorned rather than lighted by +the quaint boat of the crescent moon. Weary, but lapt in a voiceless +triumph, they came at last, guided by the donkeys, to their hotel. + +All were talking of the earthquake. A great part of the English had +fled in a panic terror, like sheep that had no shepherd--hunted by +their own fears, and betrayed by their imagined faith. The steadiest +church-goer fled like the infidel he reviled. The fool said in his +heart, “There is no God,” and fled. The Christian said with his mouth, +“Verily there is a God that ruleth in the earth!” and fled--far as he +could from the place which, as he fancied, had shown signs of a +special presence of the father of Jesus Christ. + +After the Porsons were in the house, there came two or three small +shocks. Every time, out with a cry rushed the inhabitants into the +streets; every time, out into the garden of the hotel swarmed such as +were left in it of Germans and English. But our little couple, who had +that day seen so much more of its terrors than any one else in the +place, and whose chamber was at the top of the house where the swaying +was worst, were too much absorbed in watching and tending their lovely +boy to heed the earthquake. Perhaps their hearts whispered, “Can that +which has given us such a gift be unfriendly?” + +“If his father and mother,” said Mrs. Porson, as they stood regarding +him, “are permitted to see their child, they shall see how we love +him, and be willing he should love us!” + +As they went up the stairs with him, the boy woke. When he looked and +saw a face that was not his mother’s, a cloud swept across the heaven +of his eyes. He closed them again, and did not speak. The first of the +shocks came as they were putting him to bed: he turned very white and +looked up fixedly, as if waiting another fall from above, but sat +motionless on his new mother’s lap. The instant the vibration and +rocking ceased, he drank from the cup of milk she offered him, as +quietly as if but a distant thunder had rolled away. When she put him +in the bed, he looked at her with such an indescribable expression of +bewildered loss, that she burst into tears. The child did not cry. He +had not cried since they took him. The woman’s heart was like to break +for him, but she managed to say, + +“God has taken her, my darling. He is keeping her for you, and I am +going to keep you for her;” and with that she kissed him. + +The same moment came the second shock. + +Need wakes prophecy: the need of the child made of the parson a +prophet. + +“It is God that does the shaking,” he said. “It’s all right. Nobody +will be the worse--not much, at least!” + +“Not at all,” rejoined the boy, and turned his face away. + +From the lips of such a tiny child, the words seemed almost awful. + +He fell fast asleep, and never woke till the morning. Mrs. Porson lay +beside him, yielding him, stout as she was, a good half of the little +Italian bed. She scarcely slept for excitement and fear of smothering +him. + +The Porsons were honest people, and for all their desire to possess +the child, made no secret of how and where they had found him, or of +as much of his name as he could tell them, which was only _Clare_. But +they never heard of inquiry after him. On the gunboat at Genoa they +knew nothing of their commander’s purposes, or where to seek him. Days +passed before they began to be uneasy about him, and when they did +make what search for him they could, it was fruitless. + + + + + Chapter V. + + HIS NEW HOME. + + +The place to which the good people carried the gift of the +earthquake--carried him with much anxiety and more exultation--had no +very distinctive features. It had many fields in grass, many in crop, +and some lying fallow--all softly undulating. It had some trees, and +everywhere hedges dividing fields whose strange shapes witnessed to a +complicated history, of which few could tell anything. Here and there +in the hollows between the motionless earth-billows, flowed, but did +not seem to flow, what they called a brook. But the brooks there were +like deep soundless pools without beginning or end. There was no life, +no gaiety, no song in them, only a sullen consent to exist. That at +least is how they impress one accustomed to real brooks, lark-like, +always on the quiver, always on the move, always babbling and gabbling +and gamboling, always at their games, always tossing their pebbles +about, and telling them to talk. A man that loved them might say there +was more in the silence of these, than in the speech of those; but +what silence can be better than a song of delight that we are, that we +were, that we are to be! The stillness may be full of solemn fish, +mysterious as itself, and deaf with secrets; but blessed is the brook +that lets the light of its joy shine. + +Dull as the place must seem in this my description, it was the very +country for the boy. He would come into more contact with its modest +beauty in a day than some of us would in a year. Nobody quite knows +the beauty of a country, especially of a quiet country, except one who +has been born in it, or for whom at least childhood and boyhood and +youth have opened door after door into the hidden phases of its +life. There is no square yard on the face of the earth but some one +can in part understand what God meant in making it; while the same +changeful skies canopy the most picturesque and the dullest +landscapes; the same winds wake and blow over desert and pasture land, +making the bosoms of youth and age swell with the delight of their +blowing. The winds are not all so full as are some of delicious odours +gathered as they pass from gardens, fields, and hill-sides; but all +have their burden of sweetness. Those that blew upon little Clare were +oftener filled with the smell of farmyards, and burning weeds, and +cottage-fires, than of flowers; but never would one of such odours +revisit him without bringing fresh delight to his heart. Its mere +memorial suggestion far out on the great sea would wake the old child +in the man. The pollards along the brooks grew lovely to his heart, +and were not the less lovely when he came to understand that they were +not so lovely as God had meant them to be. He was one of those who, +regarding what a thing _is_, and not comparing it with other things, +descry the thought of God in it, and love it; for to love what is +beautiful is as natural as to love our mothers. + +The parsonage to which his new father and mother brought him was like +the landscape--humble. It was humble even for a parsonage--which has +no occasion to be fine. For men and women whose business it is to +teach their fellows to be true and fair, and not covet fine things, +are but hypocrites, or at best intruders and humbugs, if they want +fine things themselves. Jesus Christ did not care about fine +things. He loved every lovely thing that ever his father made. If any +one does not know the difference between fine things and lovely +things, he does not know much, if he has all the science in the world +at his finger-ends. + +One good thing about the parsonage was, that it was old, and the +swallows had loved it for centuries. That way Clare learned to love +the swallows--and they are worth loving. Then it had a very old +garden, nearly as old-fashioned as it was old, and many flowers that +have almost ceased to be seen grew in it, and did not enjoy their +lives the less that they were out of fashion. All the furniture in the +house was old, and mostly shabby; it was possible, therefore, to love +it a little. Who on earth could be such a fool as to love a new piece +of furniture! One might prize it; one might admire it; one might like +it because it was pretty, or because it was comfortable; but only a +silly woman whose soul went to bed on her new sideboard, could say she +loved it. And then it would not be true. It is impossible that any but +an _old_ piece of furniture should be loved. + +His father and mother had a charming little room made for him in the +garret, right up among the swallows, who soon admitted him a member of +their society--an honorary member, that is, who was not expected to +fly with them to Africa except he liked. His new parents did this +because they saw that, when he could not be with them, he preferred +being by himself; and that moods came upon him in which he would steal +away even from them, seized with a longing for loneliness. In general, +next to being with his mother anywhere, he liked to be with his father +in the study. If both went out, and could not take him with them, he +would either go to his own room, or sit in the study alone. It was a +very untidy room, crowded with books, mostly old and dingy, and in +torn bindings. Many of them their owner never opened, and they +suffered in consequence; a few of them were constantly in his hands, +and suffered in consequence. All smelt strong of stale tobacco, but +that hardly accounts for the fact that Clare never took to smoking. +Another thing perhaps does--that he was always too much of a man to +want to look like a man by imitating men. That is unmanly. A boy who +wants to look like a man is not a manly boy, and men do not care for +his company. A true boy is always welcome to a true man, but a +would-be man is better on the other side of the wall. + +His mother oftenest sat in a tiny little drawing-room, which smelt of +withered rose-leaves. I think it must smell of them still. I believe +it smelt of them a hundred years before she saw the place. Clare loved +the smell of the rose-leaves and disliked the smell of the tobacco; +yet he preferred the study with its dingy books to the pretty +drawing-room without his mother. + +There was a village, a very small one, in the parish, and a good many +farm-houses. + +Such was the place in which Clare spent the next few years of his +life, and there his new parents loved him heartily. The only thing +about him that troubled them, besides the possibility of losing him, +was, that they could not draw out the tiniest smile upon his sweet, +moonlight-face. + + + + + Chapter VI. + + WHAT DID DRAW OUT HIS FIRST SMILE. + + +Mr. Porson was a man about five and forty; his wife was a few years +younger. His theories of religion were neither large nor lofty; he +accepted those that were handed down to him, and did not trouble +himself as to whether they were correct. He did what was better: he +tried constantly to obey the law of God, whether he found it in the +Bible or in his own heart. Thus he was greater in the kingdom of +heaven than thousands that knew more, had better theories about God, +and could talk much more fluently concerning religion than he. By +obeying God he let God teach him. So his heart was always growing; and +where the heart grows, there is no fear of the intellect; there it +also grows, and in the best fashion of growth. He was very good to his +people, and not foolishly kind. He tried his best to help them to be +what they ought to be, to make them bear their troubles, be true to +one another, and govern themselves. He was like a father to them. For +some, of course, he could do but little, because they were locked +boxes with nothing in them; but for a few he did much. Perhaps it was +because he was so good to his flock that God gave him little Clare to +bring up. Perhaps it was because he and his wife were so good to +Clare, that by and by a wonderful thing took place. + +About three years after the earthquake, Mrs. Porson had a baby-girl +sent her for her very own. The father and mother thought themselves +the happiest couple on the face of the earth--and who knows but they +were! If they were not, so much the better! for then, happy as they +were, there were happier yet than they; and who, in his greatest +happiness, would not be happier still to know that the earth held +happier than he! + +When Clare first saw the baby, he looked down on her with solemn, +unmoved countenance, and gazed changeless for a whole minute. He +thought there had been another earthquake, that another church-dome +had fallen, and another child been found and brought home from the +ruin. Then light began to grow somewhere under his face. His mother, +full as was her heart of her new child, watched his countenance +anxiously. The light under his face grew and grew, till his face was +radiant. Then out of the midst of the shining broke the heavenliest +smile she had ever seen on human countenance--a smile that was a +clearer revelation of God than ten thousand books about him. For what +must not that God be, who had made the boy that smiled such a smile +and never knew it! After this he smiled occasionally, though it was +but seldom. He never laughed--that is, not until years after this +time; but, on the other hand, he never looked sullen. A quiet peace, +like the stillness of a long summer twilight in the north, dwelt upon +his visage, and appeared to model his every motion. Part of his life +seemed away, and he waiting for it to come back. Then he would be +merry! + +He was never in a hurry, yet always doing something--always, that is, +when he was not in his own room. There his mother would sometimes find +him sitting absolutely still, with his hands on his knees. Nor was she +sorry to surprise him thus, for then she was sure of one of his rare +smiles. She thought he must then be dreaming of his own mother, and a +pang would go through her at the thought that he would one day love +her more than herself. “He will laugh then!” she said. She did not +think how the gratitude of that mother would one day overwhelm her +with gladness. + +He never sought to be caressed, but always snuggled to one that drew +him close. Never once did he push any one away. He learned what +lessons were set him--not very fast, but with persistent endeavour to +understand. He was greatly given to reading, but not particularly +quick. He thus escaped much fancying that he knew when he did not +know--a quicksand into which fall so many clever boys and girls. Give +me a slow, steady boy, who knows when he does not know a thing! To +know that you do not know, is to be a small prophet. Such a boy has a +glimmer of the something he does not know, or at least of the place +where it is; while the boy who easily grasps the words that stand for +a thing, is apt to think he knows the thing itself when he sees but +the wrapper of it--thinks he knows the church when he has caught sight +of the weather-cock. Mrs. Porson could see the understanding of a +thing gradually burst into blossom on the boy’s face. It did not +smile, it only shone. Understanding is light; it needs love to change +light into a smile. + +There was something in the boy that his parents hardly hoped to +understand; something in his face that made them long to know what was +going on in him, but made them doubt if ever in this life they +should. He was not concealing anything from them. He did not know that +he had anything to tell, or that they wanted to know anything. He +never doubted that everybody saw him just as he felt himself; his soul +seemed bare to all the world. But he knew little of what was passing +in him: child or man never knows more than a small part of that. + +When first he was allowed to take the little Mary in his arms, he +sitting on a stool at his mother’s feet, it was almost a new start in +his existence. A new confidence was born in his spirit. Mrs. Porson +could read, as if reflected in his countenance, the pride and +tenderness that composed so much of her own conscious motherhood. A +certain staidness, almost sternness, took possession of his face as he +bent over the helpless creature, half on his knees, half in his +arms--the sternness of a protecting divinity that knew danger not +afar. He had taken a step upward in being; he was aware in himself, +without knowing it, of the dignity of fatherhood. Even now he knew +what so many seem never to learn, that a man is the defender of the +weak; that, if a man is his brother’s keeper, still more is he his +sister’s. She belonged to him, therefore he was hers in the slavery of +love, which alone is freedom. So reverential and so careful did he +show himself, that soon his mother trusted him, to the extent of his +power, more than any nurse. + +By and by she made the delightful discovery that, when he was alone +with the baby, the silent boy could talk. Where was no need or hope of +being understood, his words began to flow--with a rhythmical cadence +that seemed ever on the verge of verse. When first his mother heard +the sweet murmur of his voice, she listened; and then first she +learned what a hold the terrible thing that had given him into her +arms had upon him. For she heard him half singing, half saying-- + +“Baby, baby, do not grow. Keep small, and lie on my lap, and dream of +walking, but never walk; for when you walk you will run, and when you +run you will go away with father and mother--away to a big place where +the ground goes up to the sky; and you will go up the ground that goes +up to the sky, and you will come to a big church, and you will go into +the church; and the ground and the church and the sky will go _hurr, +hurr, hurr_; and the sky, full of angels, will come down with a great +roar; and all the yards and sails will drop out of the sky, and tumble +down father and mother, and hold them down that they cannot get up +again; and then you will have nobody but me. I will do all I can, but +I am only brother Clare, and you will want, want, want mother and +father, mother and father, and they will be always coming, and never +be come, not for ever so long! Don’t grow a big girl, Maly!” + +[Illustration: CLARE IS HEARD TALKING TO MALY.] + +The mother could not think what to say. She went in, and, in the hope +of turning his thoughts aside, took the baby, and made haste to +consult her husband. + +“We must leave it,” said Mr. Porson. “Experience will soon correct +what mistake is in his notion. It is not so very far wrong. You and I +must go from them one day: what is it but that the sky will fall down +on us, and our bodies will get up no more! He thinks the time nearer +at hand than for their sakes I hope it is; but nobody can tell.” + +Clare never associated the church where the awful thing took place, +with the church to which he went on Sundays. The time for it, he +imagined, came to everybody. To Clare, nothing ever _happened_. The +way out of the world was a church in a city set on a hill, and there +an earthquake was always ready. + +The heart of his adoptive mother grew yet more tender toward him after +the coming of her own child. She was not quite sure that she did not +love him even more than Mary. She could not help the feeling that he +was a child of heaven sent out to nurse on the earth; and that it was +in reward for her care of him that her own darling was sent her. That +their love to the boy had something to do with the coming of the girl, +I believe myself, though what that something was, I do not precisely +understand. + +She left him less often alone with the child. She would not have his +thoughts drawn to the church of the earthquake; neither would she have +the mournfulness of his sweet voice much in the ears of her baby. He +never sang in a minor key when any one was by, but always and solely +when the baby and he were alone together. + + + + + Chapter VII. + + CLARE AND HIS BROTHERS. + + +After a year or two, Mr. Porson became anxious lest the boy should +grow up too unlike other boys--lest he should not be manly, but of a +too gently sad behaviour. He began, therefore, to take him with him +about the parish, and was delighted to find him show extraordinary +endurance. He would walk many miles, and come home less fatigued than +his companion. To be sure, he had not much weight to carry; but it +seemed to Mr. Porson that his utter freedom from thought about himself +had a large share in his immunity from weariness. He continued slight +and thin--which was natural, for he was growing fast; but the muscles +of his little bird-like legs seemed of steel. The spindle-shanks went +striding, striding without a check, along the roughest roads, the pale +face shining atop of them like a sweet calm moon. To Mr. Porson’s +eyes, the moon, stooping, as she sometimes seems to do, downward from +the sky, always looked like him. The child woke something new in the +heart and mind of every one that loved him, but was himself +unconscious of his influence. His company was no check to his father +when meditating, after his habit as he walked, what he should say to +his people the next Sunday. For the good man never wrote or read a +sermon, but talked to his people as one who would meet what was in +them with what was in him. Hence they always believed “the parson +meant it.” He never said anything clever, and never said anything +unwise; never amused them, and never made them feel scornful, either +of him or of any one else. + +Instead of finding the presence of Clare distract his thoughts, he had +at times a curious sense that the boy was teaching him--that his +sermon was running before, or walking sedately on this side of him or +that. For Clare could run like the wind; and did run after +butterflies, dragon-flies, or anything that offered a chance of seeing +it nearer; but he never killed, and seldom tried to catch anything, if +but for a moment’s examination. The swiftest run would scarcely +heighten the colour of his pale cheeks. + +He soon came to be known in the farm-houses of the parish. The +farmer-families were a little shy of him at first, fancying him too +fine a little gentleman for them; but as they got to know him, they +grew fond of him. They called him “the parson’s man,” which pleased +Clare. But one old woman called him “the parson’s cherubim.” + +One day Mr. Porson was calling at the house of the largest farm in the +parish, the nearest house to the parsonage. The farmer’s wife was ill, +and having to go to her room to see her, he said to the boy-- + +“Clare, you run into the yard. Give my compliments to any one you +meet, and ask him to let you stay with him.” + +When the time came for their departure, Mr. Porson went to find +him. He did not call him; he wanted to see what he was about. Unable +to discover him, and coming upon no one of whom he might inquire, for +it was hay-time and everybody in the fields, he was at last driven to +use his voice. + +He had not to call twice. Out of the covered part of the pigsty, not +far from which the parson stood, the boy came creeping on all fours, +followed by a litter of half-grown, grunting, gamboling pigs. + +“Here I am, papa!” he cried. + +“Clare,” exclaimed his father, “what a mess you have made of +yourself!” + +“I gave them your compliments,” answered the boy, as he scrambled over +the fence with his father’s assistance, “and asked them if I might +stay with them till you were ready. They said yes, and invited me +in. I went in; and we’ve been having such games! They were very kind +to me.” + +His father turned involuntarily and looked into the sty. There stood +all the pigs in a row, gazing after the boy, and looking as sorry as +their thick skins and bony snouts would let them. Their mother rose in +a ridge behind them, gazing too. Mr. Skymer always spoke of pigs as +about the most intelligent animals in the world. + +[Illustration: CLARE MAKES FRIENDS DURING MR. PORSON’S ABSENCE.] + +I do not know when or where or how his love of the animals began, for +he could not tell me. If it began with the pigs, it was far from +ending with them. + +The next day he asked his father if he might go and call upon the +pigs. + +“Have you forgotten, Clare,” said his mother, “what a job Susan and I +had with your clothes? I wonder still how you could have done such a +thing! They were quite filthy. When I saw you, I had half a mind to +put you in a bath, clothes and all. I doubt if they are sweet yet!” + +“Oh, yes, they are, indeed, mamma!” returned Clare; “and you know I +shall be careful after this! I shall not go into their house, but get +the farmer to let them out. I’ve thought of a new game with them!” + +His mother consented; the farmer did let the pigs out; and Clare and +they had a right good game together among the ricks in the yard. + +His growing nature showed itself in a swiftly widening friendship for +live things. The spreading ripples of his affection took in the cows +and the horses, the hens and the geese, and every creature about the +place, till at length it had to pull up at the moles, because he could +not get at them. I doubt if he would have liked them if he had seen +one eat a frog! He called the pigs little brothers, and the horses and +cows big brothers, and was perfectly at home with them before people +knew he cared for their company. I think his absolute simplicity +brought him near to the fountain of life, or rather, prevented him +from straying from it; and this kept him so alive himself, that he was +delicately sensitive to all life. He felt himself pledged to all other +life as being one with it. Its forms were therefore so open to him as +to seem familiar from the first. He knew instinctively what went on in +regions of life differing from his own--knew, without knowing how, +what the animals were thinking and feeling; so was able to interpret +their motions, even the sudden changes in their behaviour. + +There was one dangerous animal on the place--a bull, of which the +farmer had often said he must part with him, or he would be the death +of somebody. One morning he was struck with terror to find Clare in +the stall with Nimrod. The brute was chained up pretty short, but was +free enough for terrible mischief: Clare was stroking his nose, and +the beast was standing as still as a bull of bronze, with one curved +and one sharp, forward-set, wicked-looking horn in alarming proximity +to the angelic face. The farmer stood in dismay, still as the bull, +afraid to move. Clare looked up and smiled, but his delicate little +hand went on caressing the huge head. It was one of God’s small high +creatures visiting with good news of hope one of his big low +creatures--a little brother of Jesus Christ bringing a taste of his +father’s kingdom to his great dull bull of a brother. The farmer +called him. The boy came at once. Mr. Goodenough told him he must not +go near the bull; he was fierce and dangerous. Clare informed him that +he and the bull had been friends for a long time; and to prove it ran +back, and before the farmer could lay hold of him, was perched on the +animal’s shoulders. The bull went on eating the grass in the manger +before him, and took as little heed of the boy as if it were but a fly +that had lighted on him, and neither tickled nor stung him. + +By degrees he grew familiar with all the goings on at the farm, and +drew nearer to a true relation with the earth that nourishes +all. Where the soil was not too heavy, the ploughman would set him on +the back of the near horse, and there he would ride in triumph to the +music of the ploughman’s whistle behind. His was not the pomp of the +destroyer who rides trampling, but the pomp of the saviour drawing +forth life from the earth. In the summer the hayfield knew him, and in +the autumn the harvest-field, where busily he gathered what the earth +gave, and for himself strength, a sense of wide life and large +relations. The very mould, not to say the grass-blades and the +daisies, was dear to him. He was more sympathetic with the daisies +ploughed down than was even Burns, for he had a strong feeling that +they went somewhere, and were the better for going; that this was the +way their sky fell upon them. + +All the people on the farm, all the people of the village, every one +in the parish knew the boy and his story. From his gentleness and +lovingkindness to live things, there were who said he was half-witted; +others said he saw ghosts. The boys of the village despised, and some +hated him, because he was so unlike them. They called him a girl +because where they tormented he caressed. At this he would smile, and +they durst not lay hands on him. + +The days are long in boyhood, and Clare could do a many things in +one. There was the morning, the forenoon, and the long afternoon and +evening! He could help on the farm; he could play with ever so many +animals; he could learn his lessons, which happily were not heavy; he +could read any book he pleased in his father’s library, where +_Paradise Lost_ was his favourite; he could nurse little “Maly.” He had +the more time for all these that he had no companion of his own age, +no one he wanted to go about with after school-hours. His father was +still his chief human companion, and neither of them grew tired of the +other. + +The most remarkable thing in the child was the calm and gentle +greatness of his heart. You often find children very fond of one or +two people, who, perhaps, in evil return, want to keep them all to +themselves, and reproach them for loving others. Many persons count it +a sign of depth in a child that he loves only one or two. I doubt it +greatly. I think that only the child who loves all life can love right +well, can love deeply and strongly and tenderly the lives that come +nearest him. Low nurses and small-hearted mothers dwarf and pervert +their children, doing their worst to keep them from having big hearts +like God. Clare had other teaching than this. He had lost his father +and mother, but many were given him to love; and so he was helped to +wait patiently till he found them again. God was keeping them for him +somewhere, and keeping him for them here. + +The good for which we are born into this world is, that we may learn +to love. I think Clare the most enviable of boys, because he loved +more than any one of his age I have heard of. There are people--oh, +such silly people they are!--though they may sometimes be +pleasing--who are always wanting people to love them. They think so +much of themselves, that they want to think more; and to know that +people love them makes them able to think more of themselves. They +even think themselves loving because they are fond of being loved! +You might as soon say because a man loves money he is generous; +because he loves to gather, therefore he knows how to scatter; because +he likes to read a story, therefore he can write one. Such lovers are +only selfish in a deeper way, and are more to blame than other selfish +people; for, loving to be loved, they ought the better to know what an +evil thing it is not to love; what a mean thing to accept what they +are not willing to give. Even to love only those that love us, is, as +the Lord has taught us, but a pinched and sneaking way of +loving. Clare never thought about being loved. He was too busy loving, +with so many about him to love, to think of himself. He was not the +contemptible little wretch to say, “What a fine boy I am, to make +everybody love me!” If he had been capable of that, not many would +have loved him; and those that did would most of them have got tired +of loving a thing that did not love again. Only great lovers like God +are able to do that, and they help God to make love grow. But there is +little truth in love where there is no wisdom in it. Clare’s father +and mother were wise, and did what they could to make Clare wise. + +Also the animals, though they were not aware of it, did much to save +him from being spoiled by the humans whom the boy loved more than +them. For Clare’s charity began at home. Those who love their own +people will love other people. Those who do not love children will +never love animals right. + +Here I will set down a strange thing that befell Clare, and caused him +a sore heart, making him feel like a traitor to the whole animal race, +and influencing his life for ever. I was at first puzzled to account +for the thing without attributing more imagination to the animals--or +some of them--than I had been prepared to do; but probably the main +factor in it was heart-disease. + +He had seen men go out shooting, but had never accompanied any +killers. I do not quite understand how, as in my story, he came even +to imitate using a gun. There was nothing in him that belonged to +killing; and that is more than I could say for myself, or any other +man I know except Clare Skymer. + +He was at the bottom of the garden one afternoon, where nothing but a +low hedge came between him and a field of long grass. He had in his +hand the stick of a worn-out umbrella. Suddenly a half-grown rabbit +rose in the grass before him, and bolted. From sheer unconscious +imitation, I believe, he raised the stick to his shoulder, and said +_Bang_. The rabbit gave a great bound into the air, fell, and lay +motionless. With far other feelings than those of a sportsman, Clare +ran, got through the hedge, and approached the rabbit trembling. He +could think nothing but that the creature was playing him a trick. Yet +he was frightened. Only how could he have hurt him! + +“I dare say the little one knows me,” he said to himself, “and wanted +to give me a start! He couldn’t tell what a start it would be, or he +wouldn’t have done it.” + +When he drew near, however, “the little one” did not, as he had hoped +and expected, jump up and run again. With sinking heart Clare went +close up, and looked down on it. It lay stretched out, motionless. +With death in his own bosom he stooped and tenderly lifted it. The +rabbit was stone-dead! The poor boy gazed at it, pressed it tenderly +to his heart, and went with it to find his mother. The tears kept +pouring down his face, but he uttered no cry till he came to her. Then +a low groaning howl burst from him; he laid the dead thing in her lap, +and threw himself on the floor at her feet in an abandonment of +self-accusation and despair. + +It was long before he was able to give her an intelligible account of +what had taken place. She asked him if he had found it dead. In answer +he could only shake his head, but that head-shake had a whole tragedy +in it. Then she examined “the little one,” but could find no mark of +any wound upon it. When at length she learned how the case was, she +tried to comfort him, insisting he was not to blame, for he did not +mean to kill the little one. He would not hearken to her loving +sophistry. + +“No, mother!” he said through his sobs; “I wouldn’t have blamed +myself, though I should have been very sorry, if I had killed him by +accident--if I had stepped upon him, or anything of that kind; but I +meant to frighten him! I looked bad at him! I made him think I was an +enemy, and going to kill him! I shammed bad--and so was real bad.” + +He stopped with a most wailful howl. + +“Perhaps he knew me,” he resumed, “and couldn’t understand it. It was +much worse than if I had shot him. He wouldn’t have known then till he +was dead. But to die of terror was horrible. Oh, why didn’t I think +what I was doing?” + +“Nobody could have thought of such a thing happening.” + +“No; but I ought to have thought, mother, of what I was doing. I was +trying to frighten him! I must have been in a cruel mood. Why didn’t I +think love to the little one when I saw him, instead of thinking death +to him? I shall never look a rabbit in the face again! My heart must +have grown black, mother!” + +“I don’t believe there is another rabbit in England would die from +such a cause,” persisted his mother thoughtfully. + +“Then what a superior rabbit he must have been!” said Clare. “To think +that I pulled down the roof of his church upon him!” + +He burst into a torrent of tears, and ran to his own room. There his +mother thought it better to leave him undisturbed. She wisely judged +that a mind of such sensibility was alone capable of finding the +comfort to fit its need. + +Such comfort he doubtless did find, for by the time his mother called +him to tea, calmness had taken the place of the agony on his +countenance. His mother asked him no questions, for she as well as her +husband feared any possible encouragement to self-consciousness. I +imagine the boy had reflected that things could not go so wrong that +nobody could set them right. I imagine he thought that, if he had done +the rabbit a wrong, as he never for a moment to the end of his life +doubted he had, he who is at the head of all heads and the heart of +all hearts, would contrive to let him tell the rabbit he was sorry, +and would give him something to do for the rabbit that would make up +for his cruelty to him. He did once say to his mother, and neither of +them again alluded to the matter, that he was sure the rabbit had +forgiven him. + +“Little ones are _so_ forgiving, you know, mother!” he added. + +Is it any wonder that my friend Clare Skymer should have been no +sportsman? + + + + + Chapter VIII. + + CLARE AND HIS HUMAN BROTHERS. + + +Another anecdote of him, that has no furtherance of the story in it, I +must yet tell. + +One cold day in a stormy March, the wind was wildly blowing broken +clouds across the heavens, and now rain, now sleet, over the shivering +blades of the young corn, whose tender green was just tinging the dark +brown earth. The fields were now dark and wintry, heartless and cold; +now shining all over as with repentant tears; one moment refusing to +be comforted, and the next reviving with hope and a sense of new +life. Clare was hovering about the plough. Suddenly he spied, from a +mound in the field, a little procession passing along the +highway. Those in front carried something on their shoulders which +must be heavy, for it took six of them to carry it. He knew it was a +coffin, for his home was by the churchyard, and a funeral was no +unfamiliar sight. Behind it one man walked alone. For a moment Clare +watched him, and saw his bowed head and heavy pace. His heart filled +from its own perennial fount of pity, which was God himself in him. He +ran down the hill and across the next field, making for a spot some +distance ahead of the procession. As it passed him, he joined the +chief mourner, who went plodding on with his arms hanging by his +sides. Creeping close up to him, he slid his little soft hand into the +great horny hand of the peasant. Instinctively the big hand closed +upon the small one, and the weather-beaten face of a man of fifty +looked down on the boy. Not a word was said between them. They walked +on, hand in hand. + +Neither had ever seen the other. The man was following his wife and +his one child to the grave. “Nothing almost sees miracles but misery,” +says Kent in _King Lear_. Because this man was miserable, he saw a +miracle where was no miracle, only something very good. The thing was +true and precious, yea, a message from heaven. Those deep, upturned, +silent eyes; the profound, divine sympathy that shone in them; the +grasp of the tiny hand upon his large fingers, made the heart of the +man, who happened to be a catholic, imagine, and for a few moments +believe, that he held the hand of the infant Saviour. The cloud lifted +from his heart and brain, and did not return when he came to +understand that this was not _the_ lamb of God, only another lamb from +the same fold. + +When they had walked about two miles, the boy began to fear he might +be intruding, and would have taken his hand from the other, but the +man held it tight, and stooping whispered it was not far now. The +child, who, without knowing it, had taken the man under the +protection of his love, yielded at once, went with him to the grave, +joined in the service, and saw the grave filled. They went again as +they had come. Not a word was spoken. The man wept a little now and +then, drew the back of his brown hand across his eyes, and pressed a +little closer the hand he held. At the gate of the parsonage the boy +took his leave. He said they would be wondering what had become of +him, or he would have gone farther. The man released him without a +word. + +His mother had been uneasy about him, but when he told her how it was, +she said he had done right. + +“Yes,” returned the boy; “I belong there myself.” + +The mother knew he was not thinking of the grave. + +One more anecdote I will give, serving to introduce the narrative of +the following chapter, and helping to show the character of the +boy. He was so unlike most boys, that one must know all he may about +him, if he would understand him. + +Never yet, strange as the assertion must seem, had the boy shown any +anger. His father was a little troubled at the fact, fearing such +absence of resentment might indicate moral indifference, or, if not, +might yet render him incapable of coping with the world. He had +himself been brought up at a public school, and had not, with all his +experience of life, come to see, any more than most of the readers of +this story now see, or for a long time will see, that there lies no +nobility, no dignity in evil retort of any kind; that evil is evil +when returned as much as when given; that the only shining thing is +good--and the most shining, good for evil. + +One day a coarse boy in the village gave him a sharp blow on the +face. It forced water from his eyes and blood from his nose. He was +wiping away both at once with his handkerchief, when a kindly girl +stopped and said to him-- + +“Never mind; don’t cry.” + +“Oh, no!” answered Clare; “it’s only water, it’s not crying. It would +be cowardly to cry.” + +“That’s a brave boy! You’ll give it him back one of these days.” + +“No,” he returned, “I shall not. I couldn’t.” + +“Why?” + +“Because it hurts so. My nose feels as if it were broken. I know it’s +not broken, but it feels like it.” + +The girl, as well as the boys who stood around him, burst into +laughter. They saw no logic in his reasoning. Clare’s was the divine +reasoning that comes of loving your neighbour; theirs was the earthly +reasoning that came of loving themselves. They did not see that to +Clare another boy was another of himself; that he was carrying out the +design of the Father of men, that his creatures should come together +into one, not push each other away. + +The next time he met the boy who struck him, so far was he both from +resentment and from the fear of being misunderstood, that he offered +him a rosy-cheeked apple his mother had given him as he left for +school. The boy was tyrant and sneak together--a combination to be +seen sometimes in a working man set over his fellows, and in a rich +man grown poor, and bent upon making money again. The boy took the +apple, never doubted Clare gave it him to curry favour, ate it up +grinning, and threw the core in his face. Clare turned away with a +sigh, and betook himself to his handkerchief again, The boy burst into +a guffaw of hideous laughter. + + + + + Chapter IX. + + CLARE THE DEFENDER. + + +This enemy was a trouble, more or less, to every decent person in the +neighbourhood. It was well his mother was a widow, for where she was +only powerless to restrain, the father would have encouraged. He was a +big, idle, sneering, insolent lad--such that had there been two more +of the sort, they would have made the village uninhabitable. It was +all the peaceable vicar could do to keep his hands off him. + +One day, little Mary being then about five years old, Clare had her +out for a walk. They were alone in a narrow lane, not far from the +farm where Clare was so much at home. To his consternation, for he had +his sister in charge, down the lane, meeting them, came the village +tyrant. He strolled up with his hands in his pockets, and barred their +way. But while, his eye chiefly on Clare, he “straddled” like +Apollyon, but not “quite over the whole breadth of the way,” Mary +slipped past him. The young brute darted after the child. Clare put +down his head, as he had seen the rams do, and as Simpson, who ill +deserved the name of the generous Jewish Hercules, was on the point of +laying hold of her, caught him in the flank, butted him into the +ditch, and fell on the top of him. + +“Run, Maly!” he cried; “I’ll be after you in a moment.” + +“Will you, you little devil!” cried the bully; and taking him by the +throat, so that he could not utter even a gurgle, got up and began to +beat him unmercifully. But the sounds of their conflict had reached +the ears of the bull Nimrod, who was feeding within the hedge. He +recognized Clare’s voice, perhaps knew from it that he was in trouble; +but I am inclined to think pure bull-love of a row would alone have +sent him tearing to the quarter whence the tyrant’s brutal bellowing +still came. There, looking over the hedge, he saw his friend in the +clutches of an enemy of his own, for Simpson never lost a chance of +teasing Nimrod when he could do so with safety. Over he came with a +short roar and a crash. Looking up, the bully saw a bigger bully than +himself, with his head down and horns level, retreating a step or two +in preparation for running at him. Simpson shoved the helpless Clare +toward the enemy and fled. Clare fell. Nimrod jumped over his +prostrate friend and tore after Simpson. Clare got up and would at +once have followed to protect his enemy, but that he must first see +his sister safe. He ran with her to a cottage hard by, handed her to +the woman at the door of it, and turning pursued Simpson and the bull. + +Nimrod overtook his enemy in the act of scrambling over a five-barred +gate. Simpson saw the head of the bull coming down upon him like the +bows of a Dutchman upon a fishing-boat, and, paralyzed with terror, +could not move an inch further. Crash against the gate came the horns +of Nimrod, with all the weight and speed of his body behind them. Away +went the gate into the field, and away went Simpson and the bull with +it, the latter nearly breaking his neck, for his horns were entangled +in the bars, one of them by the diagonal bar. Simpson’s right leg was +jammed betwixt the gate and the head and horns of the bull. He roared, +and his roars maddened Nimrod, furious already that he could not get +his horns clear. Shake and pull as he might, the gate stuck to them; +and Simpson fared little the better that the bull’s quarrel was for +the moment with the gate, and not with the leg between him and it. + +Clare had not seen the catastrophe, and did not know what had become +of pursuer or pursued, until he reached the gap where the gate had +been. He saw then the odd struggle going on, and ran to the aid of his +foe, in terror of what might already have befallen him. The moment he +laid hold of one of the animal’s horns, infuriated as Nimrod was with +his helpless entanglement, he knew at once who it was, and was quiet; +for Clare always took him by the horn when first he went up to +him. Without a moment’s demur he yielded to the small hands as they +pushed and pulled his head this way and that until they got it clear +of the gate. But then they did not let him go. Clare proceeded to take +him home, and Nimrod made no objection. Simpson lay groaning. + +When Clare returned, his enemy was there still. He had got clear of +the gate, but seemed in much pain, for he lay tearing up the grass and +sod in handfuls. When Clare stooped to ask what he should do for him, +he struck him a backhanded blow on the face that knocked him +over. Clare got up and ran. + +“Coward!” cried Simpson; “to leave a man with a broken leg to get home +by himself!” + +“I’m going to find some one strong enough to help you,” said Clare. + +But Simpson, after his own evil nature, imagined he was going to let +the bull into the field again, and fell to praying him not to leave +him. Clare knew, however, that, if his leg was broken, he could not +get him home, neither could he get home by himself; so he made haste +to tell the people at the farm, and Simpson lay in terror of the bull +till help came. + +From that hour he hated Clare, attributing to him all the ill he had +brought on himself. But he was out of mischief for a while. The +trouble fell on his mother--who deserved it, for she would believe no +ill of him, because he was _hers_. One good thing of the affair was, +that the bully was crippled for life, and could do the less harm. + +It was a great joy to Mr. Porson to learn how Clare had defended his +sister. Clergyman as he was, and knowing that Jesus Christ would never +have returned a blow, and that this spirit of the Lord was what saved +the world, he had been uneasy that his adopted child behaved just like +Jesus. That a man should be so made as not to care to return a blow, +never occurred to Mr. Porson as possible. It was therefore an +immeasurable relief to his feelings as an Englishman, to find that the +boy was so far from being destitute of pluck, that in defence of his +sister he had attacked a fellow twice his size. + +“Weren’t you afraid of such a big rascal?” he said. + +“No, papa,” answered the boy. “Ought I to have been?” + +He put his hand to his forehead, as if trying to understand. His +father found he had himself something to think about. + +There was a certain quiescence about Clare, ill to describe, +impossible to explain, but not the less manifest. Like an infant, he +never showed surprise at anything. Whatever came to him he received, +questioning nothing, marvelling at nothing, disputing nothing. What he +was told to do he went to do, never with even a momentary show of +disinclination, leaving book or game with readiness but no +eagerness. He would do deftly what was required of him, and return to +his place, with a countenance calm and sweet as the moon in highest +heaven. He seldom offered a caress except to little Mary; yet would +choose, before anything else, a place by his mother’s knee. The moment +she, or his father in her absence, entered the room and sat down, he +would rise, take his stool, and set it as near as he thought he +might. When caressed he never turned away, or looked as if he would +rather be let alone; at the same time he received the caress so +quietly, and with so little response, that often, when his heavenly +look had drawn the heart of some mother, or spinster with motherly +heart, he left an ache in the spirit he would have gone to the world’s +end to comfort. He never sought love--otherwise than by getting near +the loved. When anything was given him, he would look up and smile, +but he seldom showed much pleasure, or went beyond the regulation +thanks. But if at such a moment little Mary were by, he had a curious +way of catching her up and presenting her to the giver. Whether this +was a shape his thanks took, whether Mary was to him an incorporate +gratitude, or whether he meant to imply that she was the fitter on +whom to shower favour, it were hard to say. His mother observed, and +in her mind put the two things together, that he did not seem to prize +much any mere possession. He looked pleased with a new suit of +clothes, but if any one remarked on his care of them, he would answer, +“I mustn’t spoil what’s papa and mamma’s!” He made no hoard of any +kind. He did once hoard marbles till he had about a hundred; then it +was discovered that they were for a certain boy in the village who was +counted half-witted--as indeed was Clare himself by many. When he +learned that the boy had first been accused of stealing them--for no +one would believe that another boy had given them to him--and after +that robbed of them by the other boys, on the ground that he did not +know how to play with them, Clare saw that it was as foolish to hoard +for another as for himself. + +He was a favourite with few beyond those that knew him well. Many who +saw him only at church, or about the village, did not take to him. His +still regard repelled them. In Naples they would have said he had the +evil eye. I think people had a vague sense of rebuke in his +presence. Even his mother, passionately loving her foundling, was +aware of a film between them through which she could not quite see +him, beyond which there was something she could not get at. Clare knew +nothing of such a separation. He seemed to himself altogether close to +his mother, was aware of nothing between to part them. The cause of +the thing was, that Clare was not yet in flower. His soul was a white +half-blown bud, not knowing that it was but half-blown. It basked in +the glory of the warm sun, but only with the underside of its +flower-leaves; it had not opened its heart, the sun-side of its +petals, to the love in which it was immerged. He received the love as +a matter of course, and loved it as a matter of course. But for the +cruel Simpson he would not have known there could be any other way of +things. He did not yet know that one must not only love but mean to +love, must not only bask in the warmth of love, but know it as love, +and where it comes from--love again the fountain whence it flows. + + + + + Chapter X. + + THE BLACK AUNT. + + +Clare was yet in his tenth year when an unhealthy summer came. The sun +was bright and warm as in other summers, and the flowers in field and +garden appeared as usual when the hour arrived for them to wake and +look abroad; but the children of men did not fare so well as the +children of the earth. A peculiar form of fever showed itself in the +village. It was not very fatal, yet many were so affected as to be +long unable to work. There was consequently much distress beyond the +suffering of the fever itself. The parson and his wife went about from +morning to night among the cottagers, helping everybody that needed +help. They had no private fortune, but the small blanket of the +benefice they spread freely over as many as it could be stretched to +cover, depriving themselves of a good part of the food to which they +had been accustomed, and of several degrees of necessary warmth. When +at last the strength of the parson gave way, and the fever laid hold +of him, he had to do without many comforts his wife would gladly have +got for him. They were both of rather humble origin, having but one +relative well-to-do, a sister of Mrs. Porson, who had married a rich +but very common man. From her they could not ask help. She had never +sent them any little present, and had been fiercely indignant with +them for adopting Clare. + +Neither of them once complained, though Mrs. Porson, whose strength +was much spent, could not help weeping sometimes when she was alone +and free to weep. They knew their Lord did not live in luxury, and a +secret gladness nestled in their hearts that they were allowed to +suffer a little with him for the sake of the flock he had given into +their charge. + +The children of course had to share in the general gloom, but it did +not trouble them much. For Clare, he was not easily troubled with +anything. Always ready to help, he did not much realize what suffering +was; and he had Mary to look after, which was labour and pleasure, +work and play and pay all in one. His mother was at ease concerning +her child when she knew her in Clare’s charge, and was free to attend +to her husband. She often said that if ever any were paid for being +good to themselves, she and her husband were vastly overpaid for +taking such a child from the shuddering arms of the earthquake. + +But John Porson’s hour was come. He must leave wife and children and +parish, and go to him who had sent him. If any one think it hard he +should so fare in doing his duty, let him be silent till he learn what +the parson himself thought of the matter when he got home. People talk +about death as the gosling might about life before it chips its +egg. Take up their way of lamentation, and we shall find it an +endless injustice to have to get up every morning and go to bed every +night. Mrs. Porson wept, but never thought him or herself +ill-used. And had she been low enough to indulge in self-pity, it +would have been thrown away, for before she had time to wonder how she +was to live and rear her children, she too was sent for. In this world +she was not one of those mothers of little faith who trust God for +themselves but not for their children, and when again with her +husband, she would not trust God less. + +Clare was in the garden when Sarah told him she was dead. He stood +still for a moment, then looked up, up into the blue. Why he looked +up, he could not have told; but ever since that terrible morning of +which the vague burning memory had never passed, when the great dome +into which he was gazing, burst and fell, he had a way every now and +then of standing still and looking up. His face was white. Two slow +tears gathered, rolled over, and dried upon his face. He turned to +Mary, lifted her in his arms, and, carrying her about the garden, once +more told her his strange version of what had happened in his +childhood. Then he told her that her papa and mamma had gone to look +for his papa and mamma--“somewhere up in the dome,” he said. + +When they wanted to take Mary to see what was left of her mother, the +boy contrived to prevent them. From morning till night he never lost +sight of the child. + +One cold noon in October, when the clouds were miles deep in front of +the sun, when the rain was falling thick on the yellow leaves, and all +the paths were miry, the two children sat by the kitchen fire. Sarah +was cooking their mid-day meal, which had come from her own +pocket. She was the only servant either of them had known in the +house, and she would not leave it until some one should take charge of +them. The neighbours, dreading infection, did not come near +them. Clare sat on a little stool with Mary on his knees, nestling in +his bosom; but he felt dreary, for he saw no love-firmament over him; +the cloud of death hid it. + +With a sudden jingle and rattle, up drove a rickety post-chaise to the +door of the parsonage. Out of it, and into the kitchen, came stalking +a tall middle-aged woman, in a long black cloak, black bonnet, and +black gloves, with a face at once stern and peevish. + +“I am the late Mrs. Porson’s sister,” she said, and stood. + +Sarah courtesied and waited. Clare rose, with Mary in his arms. + +“This is little Maly, ma’am,” he said, offering her the child. + +“Set her down, and let me see her,” she answered. + +Clare obeyed. Mary put her finger in her mouth, and began to cry. She +did not like the look of the black aunt, and was not used to a harsh +voice. + +“Tut! tut!” said the black aunt. “Crying already! That will never do! +Show me her things.” + +Sarah felt stunned. This was worse than death! “If only the mistress +had taken them with her!” she said to herself. + +Mary’s things--they were not many--were soon packed. Within an hour +she was borne off, shrieking, struggling, and calling “Clay.” The black +aunt, however,--as the black aunt Clare always thought of her--cared +nothing for her resistance; and Clare, who at her first cry was +rushing to the rescue, ready once more to do battle for her, was +seized and held back by Farmer Goodenough. Sarah had sent for him, and +he had come--just in time to frustrate Clare’s valour. + +The carriage was not yet out of sight, when Farmer Goodenough began to +repent that he had come: his presence was an acknowledgment of +responsibility! Something must be done with the foundling! There was +nobody to claim him, and nobody wanted him! He had always liked the +boy, but he did not want him! His wife was not fond of the boy, nor of +any boy, and did not want him! He had said to her that Clare could not +be left to starve, and she had answered, “Why not?”! What was to be +done with him? Nobody knew--any more than Clare himself. But which of +us knows what is going to be done with him? + +Clare was nobody’s business. English farmers no more than French are +proverbial for generosity; and Farmer Goodenough, no bad type of his +class, had a wife in whose thoughts not the pence but the farthings +dominated. She was one who at once recoiled and repelled--one of those +whose skin shrinks from the skin of their kind, and who are specially +apt to take unaccountable dislikes--a pitiable human animal of the +leprous sort. She “never took to the foundling,” she said. To have +neither father nor mother, she counted disreputable. But I believe the +main source of her dislike to Clare was a feeling of undefined reproof +in the very atmosphere of the boy’s presence, his nature was so +different from hers. What urged him toward his fellow-creatures, made +her draw back from him. In truth she hated the boy. The very look of +him made her sick, she said. It was only a certain respect for the +parson, and a certain fear of her husband, who, seldom angry, was yet +capable of fury, that had prevented her from driving the child, “with +his dish-clout face,” off the premises, whenever she saw him from door +or window. It was no wonder the farmer should be at his wits’ end to +know what, as churchwarden, guardian of the poor, and friend of the +late vicar--as friendly also to the boy himself--he was bound to do. + +“Where are _you_ going?” he asked Sarah. + +“Where the Lord wills,” answered the old woman. Her ark had gone to +pieces, and she hardly cared what became of her. + +“We’ve got to look to ourselves!” said the farmer. + +“Parson used to say there was One as took that off our hands!” replied +Sarah. + +“Yes, yes,” assented Mr. Goodenough, fidgeting a little; “but the +Almighty helps them as helps themselves, and that’s sound +doctrine. You really must do something, Sarah! We can’t have you on +the parish, you know!” + +“I beg your pardon, sir, but until the child here is provided for, or +until they turn us out of the parsonage, I will not leave the place.” + +“The furniture is advertised for sale. You’ll have nothing but the +bare walls!” + +“We’ll manage to keep each other warm!--Shan’t we, Clare?” + +“I will try to keep you warm, Sarah,” responded the boy sadly. + +“But the new parson will soon be here. Our souls must be cared for!” +said the farmer. + +“Is the Lord’s child that came from heaven in an earthquake to be +turned out into the cold for fear the souls of big men should perish?” + +“Something must be done about it!” said the farmer. “What it’s to +be I can’t tell! It’s no business o’ mine any way!” + +“That’s what the priest, and the Levite, and the farmer says!” +returned Sarah. + +“Won’t you ask Mr. Goodenough to stay to dinner?” said Clare. + +He went up to the farmer, who in his perplexity had seated himself, +and laid his arm on his shoulder. + +“No, I can’t,” answered Sarah. “He would eat all we have, and not have +enough!” + +“Now Maly is gone,” returned Clare, “I would rather not have any +dinner.” + +The farmer’s old feeling for the boy, which the dread of having him +left on his hands had for the time dulled, came back. + +“Get him his dinner, Sarah,” he said. “I’ve something to see to in the +village. By the time I come back, he’ll be ready to go with me, +perhaps.” + +“God bless you, sir!” cried Sarah. “You meant it all the time, an’ I +been behavin’ like a brute!” + +The farmer did not like being taken up so sharply. He had promised +nothing! But he had nearly made up his mind that, as the friend of the +late parson, he could scarcely do less than give shelter to the child +until he found another refuge. True, he was not the parson’s child, +but he had loved him as his own! He would make the boy useful, and so +shut his wife’s mouth! There were many things Clare could do about the +place! + + + + + Chapter XI. + + CLARE ON THE FARM. + + +When Mr. Goodenough appeared at the house-door with the boy, his +wife’s face expressed what her tongue dared not utter without some +heating of the furnace behind it. But Clare never saw that he was +unwelcome. He had not begun to note outward and visible signs in +regard to his own species; his observation was confined to the +animals, to whose every motion and look he gave heed. But he was +hardly aware of watching even them: his love made it so natural to +watch, and so easy to understand them! He was not drawn to study +Mrs. Goodenough, or to read her indications; he was content to hear +what she said. + +True to her nature, Mrs. Goodenough, seeing she could not at once get +rid of the boy, did her endeavour to make him pay for his +keep. Nominally he continued to attend the village school, where the +old master was doing his best for him; but, oftener than not, she +interposed to prevent his going, and turned him to use about the +house, the dairy, and the poultry-yard. + +His new mode of life occasioned him no sense of hardship. I do not +mean because of his patient acceptance of everything that came; but +because he had been so long accustomed to the ways of a farm, to all +the phases of life and work in yard and field, that nothing there came +strange to him--except having to stick to what he was put to, and +having next to no time to read. Many boys who have found much +amusement in doing this or that, find it irksome the moment it is +required of them: Clare was not of that mean sort; he was a +gentleman. Happily he was put to no work beyond his strength. + +At first, and for some time, he had to do only with the creatures more +immediately under the care of “the mistress,” whence his acquaintance +with the poultry and the pigs, the pigeons and the calves--and +specially with such as were delicate or had been hurt--with their ways +of thinking and their carriage and conduct, rapidly increased. + +By and by, however, having already almost ceased to attend school, the +farmer, requiring some passing help a boy could give, took him from +his wife--not without complaint on her part, neither without sense of +relief, and would not part with him again. He was so quick in doing +what was required, so intelligent to catch the meaning not always +thoroughly expressed, so cheerful, and so willing, that he was a +pleasure to Mr. Goodenough--and no less a pleasure to the farmer that +dwelt in Mr. Goodenough, and seemed to most men all there was of him; +for, instead of an expense, he found him a saving. + +It was much more pleasant for Clare to be with his master than with +his mistress, but he fared the worse for it in the house. The woman’s +dislike of the boy must find outlet; and as, instead of flowing all +day long, it was now pent up the greater part of it, the stronger it +issued when he came home to his meals. I will not defile my page with +a record of the modes in which she vented her spite. It sought at +times such minuteness of indulgence, that it was next to impossible +for any one to perceive its embodiments except the boy himself. + +He now came more into contact with the larger animals about the place; +and the comfort he derived from them was greater than most people +would readily or perhaps willingly believe. He had kept up his +relations with Nimrod, the bull, and there was never a breach of the +friendship between them. The people about the farm not unfrequently +sought his influence with the animal, for at times they dared hardly +approach him. Clare even made him useful--got a little work out of him +now and then. But his main interest lay in the horses. He had up to +this time known rather less of them than of the other creatures on the +place; now he had to give his chief attention to them, laying in love +the foundation of that knowledge which afterward stood him in such +stead when he came to dwell for a time among certain eastern tribes +whose horses are their chief gladness and care. He used, when alone +with them, to talk to this one or that about the friends he had +lost--his father and mother and Maly and Sarah--and did not mind if +they all listened. He would even tell them sometimes about his own +father and mother--how the whole sky full of angels fell down upon +them and took them away. But he said most about his sister. For her he +mourned more than for any of the rest. Her screams as the black aunt +carried her away, would sometimes come back to him with such +verisimilitude of nearness, that, forgetting everything about him, he +would start to run to her. He felt somehow that it was well with the +others, but Maly had always needed _him_, and more than ever in the +last days of their companionship. He wept for nobody but Maly. In the +night he would wake up suddenly, thinking he heard her crying out for +him. Then he would get out of bed, creep to the stable, go to +Jonathan, and to him pour out his low-voiced complaint. Jonathan was +the biggest and oldest horse on the farm. + +How much he thought they understood of what he told them, I cannot +say. He was never silly; and where we cannot be sure, we may yet have +reason to hope. He believed they knew when he was in trouble, and +sympathized with him, and would gladly have relieved him of his +pain. I suspect most animals know something of the significance of +tears. More animals shed tears themselves than people think. + +For dogs, bless them, they are everywhere, and the boy had known them +from time immemorial. + +In the village, some of Clare’s old admirers began to remark that he +no longer “looked the little gentleman.” This was caused chiefly by +the state of his clothes. They were not fit for the work to which he +was put, and within a few weeks were very shabby. Besides, he was +growing rapidly, so that he and his garments were in too evident +process of parting company. Accustomed to a mother’s attentions, he +had never thought of his clothes except to take care of them for her +sake; now he tried to mend them, but soon found his labour of little +use. He had no wages to buy anything with. His clothes or his health +or his education were nothing to Mrs. Goodenough. It was no concern of +hers whether he looked decent or not. What right had such as he to +look decent? It was more than enough that she fed him! The shabbiness +of the beggarly creature was a consolation to her. + +But Clare’s toil in the open air, and his constant and willing +association with the animals, had begun to give him a bucolic +appearance. He grew a trifle browner, and showed here and there a +freckle. His health was splendid. Nothing seemed to hurt him. Hardship +was wholesome to him. To the eyes that hated him, and grudged the hire +of the mere food by which he grew, he seemed every day to enlarge +visibly. Already he gave promise of becoming a man of more than +ordinary strength and vigour. Possibly the animals gave him something. + +What may have been his outlook and hope all this time, who shall tell! +He never grumbled, never showed sign of pain or unwillingness, gave +his mistress no reason for fault-finding. She found it hard even to +discover a pretext. She seemed always ready to strike him, but was +probably afraid to do so without provocation her husband would count +sufficient. Clare never showed discomfort, never even sighed except he +were alone. Chequered as his life had been, if ever he looked forward +to a fresh change, it was but as a far possibility in the slow current +of events. But he was constantly possessed with a large dim sense of +something that lay beyond, waiting for him; something toward which the +tide of things was with certainty drifting him, but with which he had +nothing more to do than wait. He did not see that to do the things +given him to do was the only preparation for whatever, in the dim +under-world of the future, might be preparing for him; but he did feel +that he must do his work. He did not then think much about duty. He +was actively inclined, had a strong feeling for doing a thing as it +ought to be done; and was thoroughly loyal to any one that seemed to +have a right over him. In this blind, enduring, vaguely hopeful way, +he went on--sustained, and none the less certainly that he did not +know it, from the fountain of his life. When the winter came, his +sufferings, cared for as he had been, and accustomed to warmth and +softness, must at times have been considerable. In the day his work +was a protection, but at night the house was cold. He had, however, +plenty to eat, had no ailment, and was not to be greatly pitied. + + + + + Chapter XII. + + CLARE BECOMES A GUARDIAN OF THE POOR. + + +Simpson, the bully of Clare’s childhood, went limping about on a +crutch, permanently lame, and full of hatred toward the innocent +occasion of the injury he had brought upon himself. Ever since his +recovery, he had, loitering about in idleness, watched the boy, to +waylay and catch him at unawares. Not until Clare went to the farm, +however, did he once succeed; for it was not difficult to escape him, +so long as he had not laid actual hold on his prey. But he grew more +and more cunning, and contrived at last, by creeping along hedges and +lying in ambush like a snake, to get his hands upon him. Then the poor +boy fared ill. + +He went home bleeding and torn. The righteous churchwarden rebuked him +with severity for fighting. His mistress told him she was glad he had +met with some one to give him what he deserved, for she could hardly +keep her hands off him. He stared at her with wondering eyes, but said +nothing. She turned from them: the devil in her could not look in the +eyes of the angel in him. The next time he fell into the snare of his +enemy, he managed to conceal what had befallen him. After that he was +too wide awake to be caught. + +There was in the village a child whom nobody heeded. He was far more +destitute than Clare, but had too much liberty. He lived with a +wretched old woman who called him her grandson: whether he was or not +nobody cared. She made her livelihood by letting beds, in a cottage, or +rather hovel, which seemed to be her own, to wayfarers, mostly tramps, +with or without trades. The child was thus thrown into the worst of +company, and learned many sorts of wickedness. He was already a thief, +and of no small proficiency in his art. Though village-bred, he could +pick a pocket more sensitive than a clown’s. Small and deft, he had +never stood before a magistrate. He was a miserable creature, +bare-footed and bare-legged; about eight years of age, but so stunted +that to the first glance he looked less than six--with keen ferret +eyes in red rims, red hair, pasty, freckled complexion, and a +generally unhealthy look; from which marks all, Clare conceived a +pitiful sympathy for him. Their acquaintance began thus:-- + +One day, during his father’s last illness, he happened to pass the +door of the grandmother’s hovel while the crone was administering to +Tommy a severe punishment with a piece of thick rope: she had been +sharp enough to catch him stealing from herself. Clare heard his +cries. The door being partly open, he ran in, and gave him such +assistance that they managed to bolt together from the hut. A +friendship, for long almost a silent one, was thus initiated between +them. Tommy--Clare never knew his other name, nor did the boy +himself--would off and on watch for a sight of him all day long, but +had the instinct, or experience, never to approach him if any one was +with him. He was careful not to compromise him. The instant the most +momentary _tête-à-tête_ was possible, he would rush up, offer him +something he had found or stolen, and hurry away again. That he was a +thief Clare had not the remotest suspicion. He had never offered him +anything to suggest theft. + +By and by it came to the knowledge of Clare’s enemy that there was a +friendship between them, and the discovery wrought direness for +both. One day Simpson saw Clare coming, and Tommy watching him. He +laid hold of Tommy, and began cuffing him and pulling his hair, to +make him scream, thinking thus to get hold of Clare. But +notwithstanding the lesson he had received, the rascal had not yet any +adequate notion of the boy’s capacity for action where another was +concerned. He flew to the rescue, caught up the crutch Simpson had +dropped, and laid it across his back with vigour. The fellow let Tommy +go and turned on Clare, who went backward, brandishing the crutch. + +“Run, Tommy,” he cried. + +Tommy retreated a few steps. + +“Run yourself,” he counselled, having reached a safe distance. “Take +his third leg with you.” + +Clare saw the advice was good, and ran. But the next moment reflection +showed him the helplessness of his enemy. He turned, and saw him +hobbling after him in such evident pain and discomfiture, that he went +to meet him, and politely gave him his crutch. He might have thrown it +to him and gone on, but he had a horror of rudeness, and handed it to +him with a bow. Just as he regained his perpendicular, the crutch +descended on his head, and laid him flat on the ground. There the +tyrant belaboured him. Tommy stood and regarded the proceeding. + +“The cove’s older an’ bigger an’ pluckier than me,” he said to +himself; “but he’s an ass. He’ll come to grief unless he’s looked +after. He’ll be hanged else. He don’t know how to dodge. I’ll have to +take him in charge!” + +When he saw Clare free, an event to which he had contributed nothing, +he turned and ran home. + +Simpson redoubled now his persecution of Clare, and persecuted Tommy +because of Clare. He lurked for Tommy now, and when he caught him, +tormented him with choice tortures. In a word, he made his life +miserable. After every such mischance Tommy would hurry to the farm, +and lie about in the hope of a sight of Clare, or possibly a chance of +speaking to him. His repute was so bad that he dared not show himself. + +Hot tears would come into Clare’s eyes as he listened to the not +always unembellished tale of Tommy’s sufferings at the hands of +Simpson; but he never thought of revenge, only of protection or escape +for the boy. It comforted him to believe that he was growing, and +would soon be a match for the oppressor. + +Whether at this time he felt any great interest in life, or recognized +any personal advantage in growing, I doubt. But he had the friendship +of the animals; and it is not surprising that creatures their maker +thinks worth making and keeping alive, should yield consolation to one +that understands them, or even fill with a mild joy the pauses of +labour in an irksome life. + +Then each new day was an old friend to the boy. Each time the sun +rose, new hope rose with him in his heart. He came every morning fresh +from home, with a fresh promise. The boy read the promise in his great +shining, and believed it; gazed and rejoiced, and turned to his work. + +But the hour arrived when his mistress could bear his presence no +longer. Some petty loss, I imagine, had befallen her. Nothing touched +her like the loss of money--the love of which is as dread a passion as +the love of drink, and more ruinous to the finer elements of the +nature. It was like the tearing out of her heart to Mrs. Goodenough to +lose a shilling. Her self-command forsook her, perhaps, in some such +moment of vexation; anyhow, she opened the sluices of her hate, and +overwhelmed him with it in the presence of her husband. + +The farmer knew she was unfair, knew the orphan a good boy and a +diligent, knew there was nothing against him but the antipathy of his +wife. But, annoyed with her injustice, he was powerless to change her +heart. Since the boy came to live with them, he had had no pleasure in +his wife’s society. She had always been moody and dissatisfied, but +since then had been unbearable. Constantly irritated with and by her +because of Clare, he had begun to regard him as the destroyer of his +peace, and to feel a grudge against him. He sat smouldering with +bodiless rage, and said nothing. + +Clare too was silent,--for what could he say? Where is the wisdom that +can answer hatred? He carried to his friend Jonathan a heart heavy and +perplexed. + +“Why does she hate me so, Jonathan?” he murmured. + +The big horse kissed his head all over, but made him no other answer. + + + + + Chapter XIII. + + CLARE THE VAGABOND. + + +The next morning Clare happened to do something not altogether to the +farmer’s mind. It was a matter of no consequence--only cleaning that +side of one of the cow-houses first which was usually cleaned last. He +gave him a box on the ear that made him stagger, and then stand +bewildered. + +“What do you mean by staring that way?” cried the farmer, annoyed with +himself and seeking justification in his own eyes. “Am I not to box +your ears when I choose?” And with that he gave him another blow. + +Then first it dawned on Clare that he was not wanted, that he was no +good to anybody. He threw down his scraper, and ran from the +cow-house; ran straight from the farm to the lane, and from the lane +to the high road. Buffets from the hand of his only friend, and the +sudden sense of loneliness they caused, for the moment bereft Clare of +purpose. It was as if his legs had run away with him, and he had +unconsciously submitted to their abduction. + +At the mouth of the lane, where it opened on the high road, he ran +against Tommy turning the corner, eager to find him. The eyes of the +small human monkey were swollen with weeping; his nose was bleeding, +and in size and shape scarce recognizable as a nose. At the sight, the +consciousness of his protectorate awoke in Clare, and he stopped, +unable to speak, but not unable to listen. Tommy blubbered out a +confused, half-inarticulate something about “granny and the other +devil,” who between them had all but killed him. + +“What can I do?” said Clare, his heart sinking with the sense of +having no help in him. + +Tommy was ready to answer the question. He had been hatching vengeance +all the way. Eagerly came his proposition--that they should, in their +turn, lie in ambush for Simpson, and knock his crutch from under +him. That done, Clare should belabour him with it, while he ran like +the wind and set his grandmother’s house on fire. + +“She’ll be drunk in bed, an’ she’ll be burned to death!” cried +Tommy. “Then we’ll mizzle!” + +“But it would hurt them both very badly, Tommy!” said Clare, as if +unfolding the reality of the thing to a foolish child. + +“Well! all right! the worse the better! Ain’t they hurt _us_?” rejoined +Tommy. + +“That’s how we know it’s not nice!” answered Clare. “If they set it a +going, we ain’t to keep it a going!” + +“Then they’ll be at it for ever,” cried Tommy, “an’ I’m sick of it! +I’ll _kill_ granny! I swear I will, if I’m hanged for it! She’s said a +hundred times she’d pull my legs when I was hanged; but _she_ won’t be +at the hanging!” + +“Why shouldn’t you run for it first?” said Clare. “Then they wouldn’t +want to hang you!” + +“Then I shouldn’t have nobody!” replied Tommy, whimpering. + +“I should have thought Nobody was as good as granny!” said Clare. + +“A big bilin’ better!” answered Tommy bitterly. “I wasn’t meanin’ +granny--nor yet stumpin’ Simpson.” + +“I don’t know what you’re driving at,” said Clare. Tommy burst into +tears. + +“Ain’t you the only one I got, up or down?” he cried. + +Tommy had a little bit of heart--not much, but enough to have a chance +of growing. If ever creature had less than that, he was not human. I +do not think he could even be an ape. + +Some of the people about the parson used to think Clare had no heart, +and Mrs. Goodenough was sure of it. He had not a spark of gratitude, +she said. But the cause of this opinion was that Clare’s affection +took the shape of deeds far more than of words. Never were judges of +their neighbours more mistaken. The chief difference between Clare’s +history and that of most others was, that his began at the unusual +end. Clare began with loving everybody; and most people take a long +time to grow to that. Hence, those whom, from being brought nearest to +them, he loved specially, he loved without that outbreak of show which +is often found in persons who love but a few, and whose love is +defiled with partisanship. He loved quietly and constantly, in a +fashion as active as undemonstrative. He was always glad to be near +those he specially loved; beyond that, the signs of his love were +practical--it came out in ministration, in doing things for +them. There are those who, without loving, desire to be loved, because +they love themselves; for those that are worth least are most precious +to themselves. But Clare never thought of the love of others to +him--from no heartlessness, but that he did not think about +himself--had never done so, at least, until the moment when he fled +from the farm with the new agony in his heart that nobody wanted him, +that everybody would be happier without him. Happy is he that does not +think of himself before the hour when he becomes conscious of the +bliss of being loved. For it must be and ought to be a happy moment +when one learns that another human creature loves him; and not to be +grateful for love is to be deeply selfish. Clare had always loved, but +had not thought of any one as loving him, or of himself as being loved +by any one. + +“Well,” rejoined Clare, struggling with his misery, “ain’t I going +myself?” + +“You going!--That’s chaff!” + +“’Tain’t chaff. I’m on my way.” + +“What! Going to hook it? Oh golly! what a lark! Won’t Farmer +Goodenough look blue!” + +“He’ll think himself well rid of me,” returned Clare with a sigh. “But +there’s no time to talk. If you’re going, Tommy, come along.” + +He turned to go. + +“Where to?” asked Tommy, following. + +“I don’t know. Anywhere away,” answered Clare, quickening his pace. + +In spite of his swollen visage, Tommy’s eyes grew wider. + +“You ain’t cribbed nothing?” he said. + +“I don’t know what you mean.” + +“You ain’t stole something?” interpreted Tommy. + +Clare stopped, and for the first time on his own part, lifted his hand +to strike. It dropped immediately by his side. + +“No, you poor Tommy,” he said. “I don’t steal.” + +“Thought you didn’t! What are you running away for then?” + +“Because they don’t want me.” + +“Lord! what will you do?” + +“Work.” + +Tommy held his tongue: he knew a better way than that! If work was the +only road to eating, things would go badly with _him_! But he thought +he knew a thing or two, and would take his chance! There were degrees +of hunger that were not so bad as the thrashings he got, for in his +granny’s hands the rope might fall where it would; while all cripple +Simpson cared for was to make him squeal satisfactorily. But work was +worse than all! He would go with Clare, but not to work! Not he! + +Clare kept on in silence, never turning his head--out into the +untried, unknown, mysterious world, which lay around the one spot he +knew as the darkness lies about the flame of the candle. They walked +more than a mile before either spoke. + + + + + Chapter XIV. + + THEIR FIRST HELPER. + + +It was a lovely spring morning. The sun was about thirty degrees above +the horizon, shining with a liquid radiance, as if he had already +drawn up and was shining through the dew of the morning, though it lay +yet on all the grasses by the roadside, turning them into gem-plants. +Every sort of gem sparkled on their feathery or beady tops, and their +long slender blades. At the first cottages they passed, the women were +beginning their day’s work, sweeping clean their floors and +door-steps. Clare noted that where were most flowers in the garden, +the windows were brightest, and the children cleanest. + +“The flowers come where they make things nice for them!” he said to +himself. “Where the flowers see dirt, they turn away, and won’t come +out.” + +From childhood he had had the notion that the flowers crept up inside +the stalks until they found a window to look out at. Where the +prospect was not to their mind they crept down, and away by some door +in the root to try again. For all the stalks stood like watch-towers, +ready for them to go up and peep out. + +They came to a pond by a farm-house. Clare had been observing with +pity how wretched Tommy’s clothes were; but when he looked into the +pond he saw that his own shabbiness was worse than Tommy’s downright +miserableness. Nobody would leave either of them within reach of +anything worth stealing! What he wore had been his Sunday suit, and it +was not even worth brushing! + +“I’m ’orrid ’ungry,” said Tommy. “I ain’t swallered a plug this +mornin’, ’xcep’ a lump o’ bread out o’ granny’s cupboard. That’s what +I got my weltin’ for. It were a whole half-loaf, though--an’ none so +dry!” + +Clare had eaten nothing, and had been up since five o’clock--at work +all the time till the farmer struck him: he was quite as hungry as +Tommy. What was to be done? Besides a pocket-handkerchief he had but +one thing alienable. + +The very day she was taken ill, he had been in the store-room with his +mother, and she, knowing the pleasure he took in the scent of brown +Windsor-soap, had made him a present of a small cake. This he had kept +in his pocket ever since, wrapt in a piece of rose-coloured paper, his +one cherished possession: hunger deadening sorrow, the time was come +to bid it farewell. His heart ached to part with it, but Tommy and he +were so hungry! + +They went to the door of the house, and knocked--first Clare very +gently, then Tommy with determination. It was opened by a matron who +looked at them over the horizon of her chin. + +“Please, ma’am,” said Clare, “will you give us a piece of bread?--as +large a piece, please, as you can spare; and I will give you this +piece of brown Windsor-soap.” + +As he ended his speech, he took a farewell whiff of his favourite +detergent. + +“Soap!” retorted the dame. “Who wants your soap! Where did you get it? +Stole it, I don’t doubt! Show it here.” + +She took it in her hand, and held it to her nose. + +“Who gave it you?” + +“My mother,” answered Clare. + +“Where’s your mother?” + +Clare pointed upward. + +“Eh? Oh--hanged! I thought, so!” + +She threw the soap into the yard, and closed the door. Clare darted +after his property, pounced upon it, and restored it lovingly to his +pocket. + +As they were leaving the yard disconsolate, they saw a cart full of +turnips. Tommy turned and made for it. + +“Don’t, Tommy,” cried Clare. + +“Why not? I’m hungry,” answered Tommy, “an’ you see it’s no use +astin’!” + +He flew at the cart, but Clare caught and held him. + +“They ain’t ours, Tommy,” he said. + +“Then why don’t you take one?” retorted Tommy. + +“That’s why you shouldn’t.” + +“It’s why you should, for then it ’ud be yours.” + +“To take it wouldn’t make it ours, Tommy.” + +“Wouldn’t it, though? I believe when I’d eaten it, it would be +mine--rather!” + +“No, it wouldn’t. Think of having in your stomach what wasn’t yours! +No, you must pay for it. Perhaps they would take my soap for a +turnip. I believe it’s worth two turnips.” + +He spied a man under a shed, ran to him, and made offer of the soap +for a turnip apiece. + +“I don’t want your soap,” answered the man, “an’ I don’t recommend +cold turmits of a mornin’. But take one if you like, and clear +out. The master’s cart-whip ’ill be about your ears the moment he sees +you!” + +“Ain’t you the master, sir?” + +“No, I ain’t.” + +“Then the turnips ain’t yours?” said Clare, looking at him with +hungry, regretful eyes, for he could have eaten a raw potato. + +“You’re a deal too impudent to be hungry!” said the man, making a blow +at him with his open hand, which Clare dodged. “Be off with you, or +I’ll set the dog on you.” + +“I’m very sorry,” said Clare. “I did not mean to offend you.” + +“Clear out, I say. Double trot!” + +Hungry as the boys were, they must trudge! No bread, no turnip for +them! Nothing but trudge, trudge till they dropped! + +When they had gone about five miles further, they sat down, as if by +common consent, on the roadside; and Tommy, used to crying, began to +cry. Clare did not seek to stop him, for some instinct told him it +must be a relief. + +By and by a working-man came along the road. Clare hesitated, but +Tommy’s crying urged him. He rose and stood ready to accost him. As +soon as he came up, however, the man stopped of himself. He questioned +Clare and listened to his story, then counselled the boys to go back. + +“I’m not wanted, sir,” said Clare. + +“They’d kill _me_,” said Tommy. + +“God help you, boys!” returned the man. “You may be telling me lies, +and you may be telling me the truth!--A liar may be hungry, but +somehow I grudge my dinner to a liar!” + +As he spoke he untied the knots of a blue handkerchief with white +spots, gave them its contents of bread and cheese, wiped his face with +it, and put it in his pocket; lifted his bag of tools, and went his +way. He had lost his dinner and saved his life! + +The dinner, being a man’s, went a good way toward satisfying them, +though empty corners would not have been far to seek, had there been +anything to put in them. As it was, they started again refreshed and +hopeful. What had come to them once might reasonably come again! + + + + + Chapter XV. + + THEIR FIRST HOST. + + +As the evening drew on, and began to settle down into night, a new +care arose in the mind of the elder boy. Where were they to pass the +darkness?--how find shelter for sleep? It was a question that gave +Tommy no anxiety. He had been on the tramp often, now with one party, +now with another of his granny’s lodgers, and had frequently slept in +the open air, or under the rudest covert. Tommy had not much +imagination to trouble him, and in his present moral condition was +possibly better without it; but to inexperienced Clare there was +something fearful in having the night come so close to him. Sleep out +of doors he had never thought of. To lie down with the stars looking +at him, nothing but the blue wind between him and them, was like being +naked to the very soul. Doubtless there would be creatures about, to +share the night with him, and protect him from its awful bareness; but +they would be few for the size of the room, and he might see none of +them! It was the sense of emptiness, the lack of present life that +dismayed him. He had never seen any creatures to shrink from. He +disliked no one of the things that creep or walk or fly. Before long +he did come to know and dislike at least one sort; and the sea held +creatures that in after years made him shudder; but as yet, not even +rats, so terrible to many, were a terror to Clare. It was Nothing that +he feared. + +My reader may say, “But had no one taught him about God?” Yes, he had +heard about God, and about Jesus Christ; had heard a great deal about +them. But they always seemed persons a long way off. He knew, or +thought he knew, that God was everywhere, but he had never felt his +presence a reality. He seemed in no place where Clare’s eyes ever +fell. He never thought, “God is here.” Perhaps the sparrows knew more +about God than he did then. When he looked out into the night it +always seemed vacant, therefore horrid, and he took it for as empty as +it looked. And if there had been no God there, it would have been +reasonable indeed to be afraid; for the most frightful of notions is +_Nothing-at-all_. + +It grew dark, and they were falling asleep on their walking legs, when +they came to a barn-yard. Very glad were they to creep into it, and +search for the warmest place. It was a quiet part of the country, and +for years nothing had been stolen from anybody, so that the people +were not so watchful as in many places. + +They went prowling about, but even Tommy had innocent intent, eager +only after a little warmth, and as much sleep as they could find; they +came at length to an open window, through which they crawled into +what, by the smell and the noises, they knew to be a stable. It was +very dark, but Clare was at home, and felt his way about; while Tommy, +who was afraid of the horses, held close to him. Clare’s hand fell +upon the hind-quarters of a large well-fed horse. The huge animal was +asleep standing, but at the touch of the small hand he gave a low +whinny. Tommy shuddered at the sound. + +“He’s pleased,” said Clare, and crept up on his near side into the +stall. There he had soon made such friends with him, that he did not +hesitate to get in among the hay the horse had for his supper. + +“Here, Tommy!” he cried in a whisper; “there’s room for us both in the +manger.” + +But Tommy stood shaking. He fancied the darkness full of horses’ +heads, and would not stir. Clare had to get out again, and search for +a place to suit his fancy, which he found in an untenanted loose-box, +with remains of litter. There Tommy coiled himself up, and was soon +fast asleep. + +Clare returned to the hospitality of the big horse. The great nostrils +snuffed him over and over as he lay, and the boy knew the horse made +him welcome. He dropped asleep stroking the muzzle of his +chamber-fellow, and slept all the night, kept warm by the horse’s +breath, and the near furnace of his great body. + +In the morning the boys found they had slept too long, for they were +discovered. But though they were promptly ejected as vagabonds, and +not without a few kicks and cuffs, these were not administered without +the restraint of some mercy, for their appearance tended to move pity +rather than indignation. + + + + + Chapter XVI. + + ON THE TRAMP. + + +With the new day came the fresh necessity for breakfast, and the fresh +interest in the discovery of it. But breakfast is a thing not always +easiest to find where breakfasts most abound; nor was theirs when +found that morning altogether of a sort to be envied, ill as they +could afford to despise it. Passing, on their goal-less way, a +flour-mill, the door of which was half-open, they caught sight of a +heap, whether floury dust or dusty flour, it would have been hard to +say, that seemed waiting only for them to help themselves from +it. Fain to still the craving of birds too early for any worm, they +swallowed a considerable portion of it, choking as it was, nor met +with rebuke. There was good food in it, and they might have fared +worse. + +Another day’s tramp was thus inaugurated. How it was to end no one in +the world knew less than the trampers. + +Before it was over, a considerable change had passed upon Clare; for a +new era was begun in his history, and he started to grow more +rapidly. Hitherto, while with his father or mother, or with his little +sister, making life happy to her--even while at the farm, doing hard +work--he had lived with much the same feeling with which he read a +story: he was in the story, half dreaming, half acting it. The +difference between a thing that passed through his brain from the +pages of a book, or arose in it as he lay in bed either awake or +asleep, and the thing in which he shared the life and motion of the +day, was not much marked in his consciousness. He was a dreamer with +open eyes and ready hands, not clearly distinguishing thought and +action, fancy and fact. Even the cold and hunger he had felt at the +farm had not sufficed to wake him up; he had only had to wait and they +were removed. But now that he did not know whence his hunger was to be +satisfied, or where shelter was to be had; now also that there was a +hunger outside him, and a cold that was not his, which yet he had to +supply and to frustrate in the person of Tommy, life began to grow +real to him; and, which was far more, he began to grow real to +himself, as a power whose part it was to encounter the necessities +thus presented. He began to understand that things were required of +him. He had met some of these requirements before, and had satisfied +them, but without knowing them as requirements. He did it half awake, +not as a thinking and willing source of the motion demanded. He did it +all by impulse, hardly by response. Now we are put into bodies, and +sent into the world, to wake us up. We might go on dreaming for ages +if we were left without bodies that the wind could blow upon, that the +rain could wet, and the sun scorch, bodies to feel thirst and cold and +hunger and wounds and weariness. The eternal plan was beginning to +tell upon Clare. He was in process of being changed from a dreamer to +a man. It is a good thing to be a dreamer, but it is a bad thing +indeed to be _only_ a dreamer. He began to see that everybody in the +world had to do something in order to get food; that he had worked for +the farmer and his wife, and they had fed him. He had worked willingly +and eaten gladly, but had not before put the two together. He saw now +that men who would be men must work. + +His eyes fell upon a congregation of rooks in a field by the +roadside. “Are _they_ working?” he thought; “or are they stealing? If +it be stealing they are at, it looks like hard work as well. It can’t +be stealing though; they were made to live, and _how_ are they to live +if they don’t grub? that’s their work! Still the corn ain’t theirs! +Perhaps it’s only worms they take! Are the worms theirs? A man should +die rather than steal, papa said. But, if they are stealing, the crows +don’t know it; and if they don’t know it, they ain’t thieves! Is that +it?” + +The same instant came the report of a gun. A crowd of rooks rose +cawing. One of them dropped and lay. + +“He must have been stealing,” thought Clare, “for see what comes of +it! Would they shoot me if I stole? Better be shot than die of hunger! +Yes, but better die of hunger than be a thief!” + +He had read stories about thieves and honest boys, and had never seen +any difficulty in the matter. Nor had he yet a notion of how difficult +it is not to be a thief--that is, to be downright honest. If anybody +thinks it easy, either he has not known much of life, or he has never +tried to be honest; he has done just like other people. Clare did not +know that many a boy whose heart sided with the honest boy in the +story, has grown up a dishonourable man--a man ready to benefit +himself to the disadvantage of others; that many a man who passes for +respectable in this disreputable world, is counted far meaner than a +thief in the next, and is going there to be put in prison. But he +began to see that it is not enough to mean well; that he must be +sharp, and mind what he was about; else, with hunger worrying inside +him, he might be a thief before he knew. He was on the way to discover +that to think rightly--to be on the side of what is honourable when +reading a story, is a very different thing from doing right, and being +honourable, when the temptation is upon us. Many a boy when he reads +this will say, “Of course it is!” and when the time comes, will be a +sneak. + +Those crows set Clare thinking; and it was well; for if he had not +done as those thinkings taught him, he would have given a very +different turn to his history. Meditation and resolve, on the top of +honourable habit, brought him to this, that, when he saw what was +right, he just did it--did it without hesitation, question, or +struggle. Every man must, who would be a free man, who would not be +the slave of the universe and of himself. + + + + + Chapter XVII. + + THE BAKER’S CART. + + +The sweepings of the mill-floor did not last them long, and by the +time they saw rising before them the spires and chimneys of the small +county town to which the road had been leading them, they were very +hungry indeed--as hungry as they well could be without having begun to +grow faint. The moment he saw them, Clare began revolving in his mind +once more, as many times on the way, what he was to do to get work: +Tommy of course was too small to do anything, and Clare must earn +enough for both. He could think of nothing but going into the shops, +or knocking at the house-doors, and asking for something to do. So +filled was he with his need of work, and with the undefined sense of a +claim for work, that he never thought how much against him must be the +outward appearance which had so dismayed himself when he saw it in the +pond; never thought how unwilling any one would be to employ him, or +what a disadvantage was the company of Tommy, who had every mark of a +born thief. + +I do not know if, on his tramps, Tommy had been in a town before, but +to Clare all he saw bore the aspect of perfect novelty, notwithstanding +the few city-shapes that floated in faintest shadow, like memories of +old dreams, in his brain. He was delighted with the grand look of the +place, with its many people and many shops. His hope of work at once +became brilliant and convincing. + +Noiselessly and suddenly Tommy started from his side, but so much +occupied was he with what he beheld and what he thought, that he +neither saw him go nor missed him when gone. He became again aware of +him by finding himself pulled toward the entrance of a narrow lane. +Tommy pulled so hard that Clare yielded, and went with him into the +lane, but stopped immediately. For he saw that Tommy had under his arm +a big loaf, and the steam of newly-baked bread was fragrant in his +nostrils. Never smoke so gracious greeted those of incense-loving +priest. Tommy tugged and tugged, but Clare stood stock-still. + +“Where did you get that beautiful loaf, Tommy?” he asked. + +“Off on a baker’s cart,” said Tommy. “Don’t be skeered; he never saw +me! That was my business, an’ I seed to ’t.” + +“Then you stole it, Tommy?” + +“Yes,” grumbled Tommy, “--if that’s the name you put upon it when your +trousers is so slack you’ve got to hold on to them or they’d trip you +up!” + +“Where’s the cart?” + +“In the street there.” + +“Come along.” + +Clare took the loaf from Tommy, and turned to find the baker’s +cart. Tommy’s face fell, and he was conscious only of bitterness. Why +had he yielded to sentiment--not that he knew the word--when he longed +like fire to bury his sharp teeth in that heavenly loaf? Love--not to +mention a little fear--had urged him to carry it straight to Clare, +and this was his reward! He was going to give him up to the baker! +There was gratitude for you! He ought to have known better than trust +_anybody_, even Clare! Nobody was to be trusted but yourself! It did +seem hard to Tommy. + +They had scarcely turned the corner when they came upon the cart. The +baker was looking the other way, talking to some one, and Clare +thought to lay down the loaf and say nothing about it: there was no +occasion for the ceremony of apology where offence was unknown. But in +the very act the baker turned and saw him. He sprang upon him, and +collared him. The baker was not nice to look at. + +“I have you!” he cried, and shook him as if he would have shaken his +head off. + +“It’s quite a mistake, sir!” was all Clare could get out, so fierce +was the earthquake that rattled the house of his life. + +“Mistaken am I? I like that!--Police!” + +And with that the baker shook him again. + +A policeman was not far off; he heard the man call, and came running. + +“Here’s a gen’leman as wants the honour o’ your acquaintance, Bob!” +said the baker. + +But Tommy saw that, from his size, he was more likely to get off than +Clare if he told the truth. + +“Please, policeman,” he said, “it wasn’t him; it was me as took the +loaf.” + +“You little liar!” shouted the baker. “Didn’t I see him with his hand +on the loaf?” + +“He was a puttin’ of it back,” said Tommy. “I wish he’d been +somewheres else! See what he been an’ got by it! If he’d only ha’ let +me run, there wouldn’t ha’ been nobody the wiser. I _am_ sorry I +didn’t run. Oh, I _ham_ so ’ungry!” + +Tommy doubled himself up, with his hands inside the double. + +“’Ungry, are you?” roared the baker. “That’s what thieves off a +baker’s cart ought to be! They ought to be always ’ungry--’ungry to +all eternity, they ought! An’ that’s what’s goin’ to be done to ’em!” + +“Look here!” cried a pale-faced man in the front of the crowd, who +seemed a mechanic. “There’s a way of tellin’ whether the boy’s +speakin’ the truth _now_!” + +He caught up the restored loaf, halved it cleverly, and handed each of +the boys a part. + +“Now, baker, what’s to pay?” he said, and drew himself up, for the man +was too angry at once to reply. + +The boys were tearing at the delicious bread, blind and deaf to all +about them. + +“P’r’aps you would like to give _me_ in charge?” pursued their +saviour. + +“Sixpence,” said the man sullenly. + +The mechanic laid sixpence on the cover of the cart. + +“I ought to ha’ made you weigh and make up,” he said. “Where’s your +scales?” + +“Mind your own business.” + +“I mean to. Here! I want another sixpenny loaf--but I want it weighed +this time!” + +“I ain’t bound to sell bread in the streets. You can go to the +shop. Them loaves is for reg’lar customers.” + +He moved off with his cart, and the crowd began to disperse. The boys +stood absorbed, each in what remained of his half-loaf. + +When he looked up, Clare saw that they were alone. But he caught sight +of their benefactor some way off, and ran after him. + +“Oh, sir!” he said, “I was so hungry, I don’t know whether I thanked +you for the loaf. We’d had nothing to-day but the sweepings of a +mill.” + +“God bless my soul!” said the man. “People say there’s a God!” he +added. + +“I think there must be, sir, for you came by just then!” returned +Clare. + +“How do you come to be so hard-up, my boy? Somebody’s to blame +somewheres!” + +“There ain’t no harm in being hungry, so long as the loaf comes!” +rejoined Clare. “When I get work we shall be all right!” + +“That’s your sort!” said the man. “But if there had been a God, as +people say, he would ha’ made me fit to gi’e you a job, i’stead o’ +stan’in’ here as you see me, with ne’er a turn o’ work to do for +myself!” + +“I’ll work my hardest to pay you back your sixpence,” said Clare. + +“Nay, nay, lad! Don’t you trouble about that. I ha’ got two or three +more i’ my pocket, thank God!” + +“You have two Gods, have you, sir?” said Clare; “--one who does things +for you, and one who don’t?” + +“Come, you young shaver! you’re too much for me!” said the man +laughing. + +Tommy, having finished his bread, here thought fit to join them. He +came slyly up, looking impudent now he was filled, with his hands +where his pockets should have been. + +“It was you stole the loaf, you little rascal!” said the workman, +seeing thief in every line of the boy. + +“Yes,” answered Tommy boldly, “an’ I don’t see no harm. The baker had +lots, and he wasn’t ’ungry! It was Clare made a mull of it! He’s such +a duffer you don’t know! He acshally took it back to the brute! He +deserved what he got! The loaf was mine. It wasn’t his! _I_ stole it!” + +“Oh, ho! it wasn’t his! it was yours, was it?--Why do you go about +with a chap like this, young gentleman?” said the man, turning to +Clare. “I know by your speech you ain’t been brought up alongside o’ +sech as him!” + +“I had to go away, and he came with me,” answered Clare. + +“You’d better get rid of him. He’ll get you into trouble.” + +“I can’t get rid of him,” replied Clare. “But I shall teach him not to +take what isn’t his. He don’t know better now. He’s been ill-used all +his life.” + +“You don’t seem over well used yourself,” said the man. + +He saw that Clare’s clothes had been made for a boy in good +circumstances, though they had been long worn, and were much +begrimed. His face, his tone, his speech convinced him that they had +been made for _him_, and that he had had a gentle breeding. + +“Look you here, young master,” he continued; “you have no right to be +in company with that boy. He’ll bring you to grief as sure as I tell +you.” + +“I shall be able to bear it,” answered Clare with a sigh. + +“He’ll be the loss of your character to you.” + +“I ain’t got a character to lose,” replied Clare. “I thought I had; +but when nobody will believe me, where’s my character then?” + +“Now you’re wrong there,” returned the man. “I’m not much, I know; but +I believe every word you say, and should be very sorry to find myself +mistaken.” + +“Thank you, sir,” said Clare. “May I carry your bag for you?” + +If Clare had seen what then passed in Tommy’s mind, at the back of +those glistening ferret-eyes of his, he would have been almost +reconciled to taking the man’s advice, and getting rid of him. Tommy +was saying to himself that his pal wasn’t such a duffer after all--he +was on the lay for the man’s tools! + +Tommy never reasoned except in the direction of cunning self-help--of +fitting means and intermediate ends to the one main object of +eating. It is wonderful what a sharpener of the poor wits hunger is! + +“I guess I’m the abler-bodied pauper!” answered the man; and picking +up the bag he had dropped at his feet while they conversed, he walked +away. + +There are many more generous persons among the poor than among the +rich--a fact that might help some to understand how a rich man should +find it hard to enter into the kingdom of heaven. It is hard for +everybody, but harder for the rich. Men who strive to make money are +unconsciously pulling instead of pushing at the heavy gate of the +kingdom. + +“Tommy!” said Clare, in a tone new to himself, for a new sense of +moral protection had risen in him, “if ever you steal anything again, +either I give you a hiding, or you and I part company.” + +Tommy bored his knuckles into his red eyes, and began to +whimper. Again it was hard for Tommy! He had followed Clare, thinking +to supply what was lacking to him; to do for him what he was not +clever enough to do for himself; in short, to make an advantageous +partnership with him, to which he should furnish the faculty of +picking up unconsidered trifles. Tommy judged Clare defective in +intellect, and quite unpractical. He was of the mind of the +multitude. The common-minded man always calls the man who thinks of +righteousness before gain, who seeks to do the will of God and does +not seek to make a fortune, unpractical. He _will_ not see that the +very essence of the practical lies in doing the right thing. + +Tommy, in a semi-conscious way, had looked to Clare to supply the +strength and the innocent look, while he supplied the head and the +lively fingers; and here was Clare knocking the lovely plan to pieces! +He did well to be angry! But Clare was the stronger; and Tommy knew +that when Clare was roused, though it was not easy to rouse him, he +could and would and did fight--not, indeed, as the little coward said +to himself _he_ could fight, like a wild cat--but like a blundering +hornless old cow defending her calf from a cur. + +In the heart of all his selfishness, however, Tommy did a little love +Clare; and his love came, not from Tommy, but from the same source as +his desire for food, namely, from the God that was in Tommy, the God +in whom Tommy lived and had his being with Clare. Whether Tommy’s love +for Clare would one day lift him up beside Clare, that is, make him an +honest boy like Clare, remained to be seen. + +Finding his demonstration make no impression, Tommy took his knuckles +out of his eye-holes and thrust them into his pocket-holes, turned his +back on his friend, and began to whistle--with a lump of self-pity in +his throat. + + + + + Chapter XVIII. + + BEATING THE TOWN. + + +They turned their faces again toward the centre of the town, and +resumed their walk, taking in more of what they saw than while they +had not yet had the second instalment of their daily bread. What a +thing is food! It is the divineness of the invention--the need for the +food, and the food for the need--that makes those who count their +dinner the most important thing in the day, such low creatures: +nothing but what is good in itself can be turned into vileness. It is +a delight to see a boy with a good honest appetite; a boy that _loves_ +his dinner is a loathsome creature. Eat heartily, my boy, but be ready +to share, even when you are hungry, and have only what you could eat +up yourself, else you are no man. Remember that you created neither +your hunger nor your food; that both came from one who cares for you +and your neighbours as well. + +In the strength of the half-loaf he had eaten, the place looked to +Clare far more wonderful, and his hopes of earning his bread grew yet +more radiant. But he passed one shop after another, and always +something prevented him from going in. One after another did not look +just the right sort, did not seem to invite him: the next might be +better! I dare say but for that half-loaf, he would have made a trial +sooner, but I doubt if he would have succeeded sooner. He did not +think of going to parson, doctor, or policeman for advice; he went +walking and staring, followed by Tommy with his hands in his +pocketless pocket-holes. Clare was not yet practical in device, though +perfect in willingness, and thorough in design. Up one street and down +another they wandered, seeing plenty of food through windows, and in +carts and baskets, but never any coming their way, except in the form +of tempting odours that issued from almost every house, and grew in +keenness and strength toward one o’clock. Oh those odours!--agonizing +angels of invisible yet most material good! Of what joys has not the +Father made us capable, when the poorest necessity is linked with such +pain! What a tormenting thing--and what a good must be meant to come +out of it!--to be hungry, downright, cravingly hungry with the whole +microcosm, and not a halfpenny to buy a mouthful of assuagement!--to +be assailed with wafts of deliriously undefined promise, not one of +which seems likely to be fulfilled!--promise true to men hurrying home +to dinner or luncheon, but only rousing greater desire in such as +Clare and Tommy. Not one opportunity of appropriation presented +itself, else it would have gone ill with Tommy, now that the eyes and +ears of his guardian were on the alert. For Clare thought of him now +as a little thievish pup, for whose conduct, manners, and education he +was responsible. + +The agony began at length to abate--ready to revive with augmented +strength when the next hour for supplying the human furnace should +begin to approach. Few even of those who know what hunger is, +understand to what it may grow--how desire becomes longing, longing +becomes craving, and craving a wild passion of demand. It must be +terrible to be hungry, and not know God! + +As the evening came down upon them, worn out, faint with want, +shivering with cold, and as miserable in prospect as at the moment, +yet another need presented itself with equally imperative +requisition--that of shelter that they might rest. It was even more +imperative: they could not eat; they _must_ lie down! + +Whether it be a rudiment retained from their remote ancestry, I cannot +tell, but any kind of suffering will wake in some a masterful impulse +to burrow; and as the boys walked about in their misery, white with +cold and hunger, Clare’s eyes kept turning to every shallowest +archway, every breach in wall or hedge that seemed to offer the least +chance of covert, while, every now and then, Tommy would bolt from his +side to peer into some opening whose depth was not immediately patent +to his ferret-gaze. Once, in a lane on the outskirts of the town, he +darted into a narrow doorway in the face of a wall, but instantly +rushed back in horror: within was a well, where water lay still and +dark. Then first Clare had a hint of the peculiar dread Tommy had of +water, especially of water dark and unexpected. Possibly he had once +been thrown into such water to be got rid of. But Clare at the moment +was too weary to take much notice of his dismay. + +It was an old town in which they were wandering, and change in the +channels of traffic had so turned its natural nourishment aside, that +it was in parts withering and crumbling away. Not a few of the houses +were, some from poverty, some from utter disuse, yielding fast to +decay. But there were other causes for the condition of one, which, +almost directly they came out of the lane I have just mentioned, into +the end of a wide silent street, drew the roving, questing eyes of +Clare and Tommy. The moon was near the full and shining clear, so that +they could perfectly see the state it was in. Most of its windows were +broken; its roof was like the back of a very old horse; its +chimney-pots were jagged and stumped with fracture; from one of them, +by its entangled string, the skeleton of a kite hung half-way down the +front. But, notwithstanding such signs of neglect, the red-brick wall +and the wrought-iron gate, both seven feet high, that shut the place +off from the street, stood in perfect aged strength. The moment they +saw it, the house seemed to say to them, “There’s nobody here: come +in!” but the gate and the wall said, “Begone!” + + + + + Chapter XIX. + + THE BLACKSMITH AND HIS FORGE. + + +At the end of the wall was a rough boarded fence, in contact with it, +and reaching, some fifty yards or so, to a hovel in which a +blacksmith, of unknown antecedents, had taken possession of a forsaken +forge, and did what odd jobs came in his way. The boys went along the +fence till they came to the forge, where, looking in, they saw the +blacksmith working his bellows. To one with the instincts of Clare’s +birth and breeding, he did not look a desirable acquaintance. Tommy +was less fastidious, but he felt that the scowl on the man’s brows +boded little friendliness. Clare, however, who hardly knew what fear +was, did not hesitate to go in, for he was drawn as with a cart-rope +by the glow of the fire, and the sparks which, as they gazed, began, +like embodied joys, to fly merrily from the iron. Tommy followed, +keeping Clare well between him and the black-browed man, who rained +his blows on the rosy iron in his pincers, as if he hated it. + +“What do you want, gutter-toads?” he cried, glancing up and seeing +them approach. “This ain’t a hotel.” + +[Illustration: THE BLACKSMITH GIVES CLARE AND TOMMY A ROUGH GREETING.] + +“But it’s a splendid fire,” rejoined Clare, looking into his face with +a wan smile, “and we’re so cold!” + +“What’s that to me!” returned the man, who, savage about something, +was ready to quarrel with anything. “I didn’t make my fire to warm +little devils that better had never been born!” + +“No, sir,” answered Clare; “but I don’t think we’d better not have +been born. We’re both cold, and nobody but Tommy knows how hungry I +am; but your fire is so beautiful that, if you would let us stand +beside it a minute or two, we wouldn’t at all mind.” + +“Mind, indeed! Mind what, you preaching little humbug?” + +“Mind being born, sir.” + +“Why do you say _sir_ to me? Don’t you see I’m a working man?” + +“Yes, and that’s why. I think we ought to say _sir_ and _ma’am_ to +every one that can do something we can’t. Tommy and I can’t make iron +do what we please, and you can, sir! It would be a grand thing for us +if we could!” + +“Oh, yes, a grand thing, no doubt!--Why?” + +“Because then we could get something to eat, and somewhere to lie +down.” + +“Could you? Look at me, now! I can do the work of two men, and can’t +get work for half a man!” + +“That’s a sad pity!” said Clare. “I wish I had work! Then I would +bring you something to eat.” + +The man did not tell them why he had not work enough--that his +drunkenness, and the bad ways to which it had brought him, with the +fact that he so often dawdled over the work that was given him, caused +people to avoid him. + +“Who said I hadn’t enough to eat? I ain’t come to that yet, young ’un! +What made you say that?” + +“Because when I had work, I had plenty to eat; and now that I have +nothing to do, I have nothing to eat. It’s well I haven’t work now, +though,” added Clare with a sigh, “for I’m too tired to do any. Please +may I sit on this heap of ashes?” + +“Sit where you like, so long ’s you keep out o’ my way. I ain’t got +nothing to give you but a bar of iron. I’ll toast one for you if you +would like a bite.” + +“No, thank you, sir,” answered Clare, with a smile. “I’m afraid it +wouldn’t be digestible. They say toasted cheese ain’t. I wish I had a +try though!” + +“You’re a comical shaver, you are!” said the blacksmith. “You’ll come +to the gallows yet, if you’re a good boy! Them Sunday-schools is doin’ +a heap for the gallows!--That ain’t your brother?” + +By this time Tommy had begun to feel at home with the blacksmith, from +whose face the cloud had lifted a little, so that he looked less +dangerous. He had edged nearer to the fire, and now stood in the light +of it. + +“No,” answered Clare, with an odd doubtfulness in his tone. “I ought +to say _yes_, perhaps, for all men are my brothers; but I mean I +haven’t any particular one of my very own.” + +“That ain’t no pity; he’d ha’ been no better than you. I’ve a brother +I would choke any minute I got a chance.” + +While they talked, the blacksmith had put his iron in the fire, and +again stood blowing the bellows, when his attention was caught by the +gestures of the little red-eyed imp, Tommy, who was making rapid signs +to him, touching his forehead with one finger, nodding mysteriously, +and pointing at Clare with the thumb of his other hand, held close to +his side. He sought to indicate thus that his companion was an +innocent, whom nobody must mind. In the blacksmith Tommy saw one of +his own sort, and the blacksmith saw neither in Tommy nor in Clare any +reason to doubt the hint given him. Not the less was he inclined to +draw out the idiot. + +“Why do you let him follow you about, if he ain’t your brother?” he +said. “He ain’t nice to look at!” + +“I want to make him nice,” answered Clare, “and then he’ll be nice to +look at. You mustn’t mind him, please, sir. He’s a very little boy, +and ain’t been well brought up. His granny ain’t a good woman--at +least not very, you know, Tommy!” he added apologetically. + +“She’s a damned old sinner!” said Tommy stoutly. + +The man laughed. + +“Ha, ha, my chicken! you know a thing or two!” he said, as he took his +iron from the fire, and laid it again on the anvil. + +But besides the brother he would so gladly strangle, there was an +idiot one whom he had loved a little and teazed so much, that, when he +died, his conscience was moved. He felt therefore a little tender +toward the idiot before him. He bethought himself also that his job +would soon be at a stage where the fewer the witnesses the better, for +he was executing a commission for certain burglars of his +acquaintance. He would do no more that night! He had money in his +pocket, and he wanted a drink! + +“Look here, cubs!” he said; “if you ain’t got nowhere to go to, I +don’t mind if you sleep here. There ain’t no bed but the bed of the +forge, nor no blankets but this leather apron: you may have them, for +you can’t do them no sort of harm. I don’t mind neither if you put a +shovelful of slack and a little water now and then on the fire; and if +you give it a blow or two with the bellows now and then, you won’t be +stone-dead afore the mornin’!--Don’t be too free with the coals, now, +and don’t set the shed on fire, and take the bread out of my poor +innocent mouth. Mind what I tell you, and be good boys.” + +“Thank you, sir,” said Clare. “I thought you would be kind to us! I’ve +one friend, a bull, that’s very good to me. So is Jonathan. He’s a +horse. The bull’s name is Nimrod. He wants to gore always, but he’s +never cross with me.” + +The blacksmith burst into a roar of laughter at the idiotic +speech. Then he covered the fire with coal, threw his apron over +Clare’s head, and departed, locking the door of the smithy behind him. + +The boys looked at each other. Neither spoke. Tommy turned to the +bellows, and began to blow. + +“Ain’t you warm yet?” said Clare, who had seen his mother careful over +the coals. + +“No, I ain’t. I want a blaze.” + +“Leave the fire alone. The coal is the smith’s, and he told us not to +waste it.” + +“He ain’t no count!” said Tommy, as heartless as any grown man or +woman set on pleasure. + +“He has given us a place to be warm and sleep in! It would be a shame +to do anything he didn’t like. Have you no conscience, Tommy?” + +“No,” said Tommy, who did not know conscience from copper. The germ of +it no doubt lay in the God-part of him, but it lay deep. Tommy--no +worse than many a boy born of better parents--was like a hill full of +precious stones, that grows nothing but a few little dry shrubs, and +shoots out cold sharp rocks every here and there. + +“If you have no conscience,” answered Clare, “one must serve for +both--as far as it will reach! Leave go of that bellows, or I’ll make +you.” + +Tommy let the lever go, turned his back, and wandered, in such dudgeon +as he was capable of, to the other side of the shed. + +“Hello!” he cried, “here’s a door!--and it ain’t locked, it’s only +bolted! Let’s go and see!” + +“You may if you like,” answered Clare, “but if you touch anything of +the blacksmith’s, I’ll be down on you.” + +“All right!” said Tommy, and went out to see if there was anything to +be picked up. + +Clare got on the stone hearth of the forge, and lay down in the hot +ashes, too far gone with hunger to care for the clothes that were +almost beyond caring for. He was soon fast asleep; and warmth and +sleep would do nearly as much for him as food. + + + + + Chapter XX. + + TOMMY RECONNOITRES. + + +Tommy, out in the moonlight, found himself in a waste yard, scattered +over with bits of iron, mostly old and rusty. It was not an +interesting place, for it was not likely to afford him anything to +eat. Yet, with the instinct of the human animal, he went shifting and +prying and nosing about everywhere. Presently he heard a curious +sound, which he recognized as made by a hen. More stealthily yet he +went creeping hither and thither, feeling here and feeling there, in +the hope of laying his hand on the fowl asleep. Urged by his natural +impulse to forage, he had forgotten Clare’s warning. His hand did find +her, and had it been his grandmother instead of Clare in the smithy, +he would at once have broken the bird’s neck before she could cry out; +but with the touch of her feathers came the thought of Clare, and by +this time he understood that what Clare said, Clare would do. + +He had some knowledge of fowls; he had heard too much talk about them +at his grandmother’s not to know something of their habits; and +finding she sat so still, he concluded that under her might be +eggs. To his delight it was so. The hen belonged to a house at some +distance, and had wandered from it, in obedience to the secretive +instinct of animal maternity, strong in some hens, to seek a hidden +shelter for her offspring. This she had found in the smith’s yard, +beneath the mould-board of a plough that had lain there for +years. Slipping his hand under her, Tommy found five eggs. In greedy +haste he took them, every one. + +I must do him the justice to say that his first impulse was to dart +with them to Clare. But before he had taken a step toward him, again +he remembered his threat. With the eggs inside him, he could run the +risk; he would not mind a few blows--not much; but if he took them to +Clare, the unbearable thing was, that he would assuredly give every +one of them back to the hen. He was an idiot, and Tommy was there to +look after him; but, in looking after Clare, was Tommy to neglect +himself? If Clare would not eat the eggs Tommy carried him, as most +certainly he would not, the best thing was for Tommy to eat them +himself! What a good thing that it was no use to steal for Clare! The +steal would be all for himself! Not a step from the spot did Tommy +move till he had sucked every one of the five eggs. But he made one +mistake: he threw away the shells. + +When he had sucked them, he found himself much lighter-hearted, but, +alas, nearly as hungry as before! The spirit of research began again +to move him: where were eggs, what might there not be beside? + +The moon was nearly at the full; the smith’s yard was radiantly +illuminated. But even the moon could lend little enchantment to a +scene where nothing was visible but rusty, broken, deserted, +despairful pieces of old iron. Tommy lifted his eyes and looked +further. + +The enclosure was of small extent, bounded on one side by the garden +wall of the house they had just passed, and at the bottom by a broken +fence, dividing it from a piece of waste land that probably belonged +to the house. As he roamed about, Tommy spied a great heap of old iron +piled up against the wall, and made for it, in the hope of enlarging +his horizon. He scrambled to the top, and looked over. His gaze fell +right into a big butt, full of dark water. Twice that evening he met +the same horror! There was a legendary report, though he had not heard +it, I fancy, that his mother drowned herself instead of him: she fell +in, and he was fished out. Whether this was the origin of his fear or +not, so far from getting down by means of the water-butt, Tommy dared +not cross at that point. With much trembling he got on the top of the +wall, turned his back on the butt, and ran along like a cat, in search +of a place where he could descend into the garden. He went right to +the end, round the corner, and half-way along the bottom before he +found one. There he came to a doorway that had been solidly walled up +on the outside, while the door was left in position on the +inside--ready for use when the court of chancery should have decided +to whom the house belonged. Its frame was flush with the wall, so that +its bolts and lock afforded Tommy foothold enough to descend, and +confidence of being able to get up again. + +He landed in a moonlit wilderness--such a wilderness as a deserted +garden speedily becomes, the wealth in the soil converting it the +sooner to a savage chaos. Full of the impulse of discovery, and the +hope of presenting himself with importance to Clare as the bringer of +good tidings, Tommy forced his way through or crept under the +overgrown bushes, until he reached a mossy rather than gravelly walk, +where it was more easy to advance. It led him to the house. + +Had he been a boy of any imagination, he would have shuddered at the +thought of attempting an entrance. All the windows had outside +shutters. Those of the ground floor were closed--except one that swung +to and fro, and must have swung in many a wind since the house was +abandoned. The moon shone with a dull whitish gleam on the dusty +windows of the first and second stories, and on the great dormers that +shot out from the slope of the roof, and cast strange shadows upon +it. The door to the garden had had a porch of trellis-work, over which +jasmine and other creeping plants were trained; but whether anything +of the porch was left, no one could have told in that thicket of +creepers, interlaced and matted by antagonist forces of wind and +growth so that not a hint of door was visible. Clearly there was +nobody within. + +Tommy sought the window with the open shutter. Through the dirty +glass, and the reflection of the moon, he could see nothing. He tried +the sash, but could not stir it. He went round the corner to one end +of the house, and saw another door. But an enemy stepped between: the +moon shone suddenly up from the ground. In a hollow of the pavement +had gathered a pool from the drip of the neglected gutters, and out of +its hidden depth the staring round looked at him. It was the third +time Tommy’s nerves had been shaken that night, and he could stand no +more. At the awful vision he turned and fled, fell, and rose and fled +again. It was not imagination in Tommy; it was an undefined, +inexplicable horror, that must have had a cause, but could have no +reason. Young as he was he had already more than once looked on the +face of death, and had felt no awe; he had listened to the gruesomest +of tales, told not altogether without art, and had never moved a hair. +Only one material and two spiritual things had power with him; the one +material thing was hunger, the two spiritual things were a feeble love +for Clare, and a strong horror of water of any seeming depth. Now a +new element was added to this terror by the meddling of the moon in +the fiendish mystery--the secret of which must, I think, have been the +bottomless depth she gave the water. + +He rushed down the garden. With frightful hindrance from the +overgrowth, he found the prisoned door by strange perversion become a +ladder, gained by it the top of the wall, and sped along as if pursued +by an incarnate dread. Horror of horrors! all at once the moon again +looked up at him from below: he was within a yard or two of the big +water-butt! Right up to it he must go, for, close to it, on the other +side of the wall, was the heap of iron by which alone he could get +down. He tightened every nerve for the effort. He assured himself that +the thing would be over in a moment; that the water was quiet, and +could not follow him; that presently he would find himself in the +smithy by the warm forge-fire. The scaring necessity was, that he must +stoop and kneel right over the water-butt, in order to send his legs in +advance down the wall to the top of the mound. It was a moment of +agony. That very moment, with an appalling unearthly cry, something +dark, something hideous, something of inconceivable ghastliness, as it +seemed to Tommy, sprang right out of the water into the air. He +tumbled from the wall among the iron, and there lay. + +The stolen eggs were avenged. The hen, feverish and unhappy from the +loss of her hope of progeny, had gone to the butt to sip a little +water. Tommy, appearing on the wall above her, startled her. She, +flying up with a screech, startled Tommy, and became her own unwitting +avenger. + + + + + Chapter XXI. + + TOMMY IS FOUND AND FOUND OUT. + + +When Clare woke from his first sleep, which he did within an hour--for +he was too hungry to sleep straight on, and the door, imperfectly +closed by Tommy, had come open, and let in a cold wind with the +moonlight--he raised himself on his elbow, and peered from his stone +shelf into the dreary hut. He could not at once tell where he was, but +when he remembered, his first thought was Tommy. He looked about for +him. Tommy was nowhere. Then he saw the open door, and remembered he +had gone out. Surely it was time he had come back! Stiff and sore, he +turned on his longitudinal axis, crept down from the forge, and went +out shivering to look for his imp. The moon shone radiant on the rusty +iron, and the glamour of her light rendered not a few of its shapes +and fragments suggestive of cruel torture. Picking his way among +spikes and corners and edges, he walked about the hideous wilderness +searching for Tommy, afraid to call for fear of attracting attention. +The hen too was walking about, disconsolate, but she took no notice of +him, neither did the sight of her give him any hint or rouse in him +the least suspicion: how could he suspect one so innocent and troubled +for the avenging genius through whom Tommy’s white face lay upturned +to the white moon! Her egg-shells lay scattered, each a ghastly point +in the moonshine, each a silent witness to the deed that had been +done. Tommy scattered and forgot them; the moon gathered and noted +them. But they told Clare nothing, either of Tommy’s behaviour or of +Tommy himself. + +He came at last to the heap of metal, and there lay Tommy, caught in +its skeleton protrusions. A shiver went through him when he saw the +pallid face, and the dark streak of blood across it. He concluded that +in trying to get over the wall he had failed and fallen back. He +climbed and took him in his arms. Tommy was no weight for Clare, weak +with hunger as he was, to carry to the smithy. He laid him on the +hearth, near the fire, and began to blow it up. The roaring of the +wind in the fire did not wake him. Clare went on blowing. The heat +rose and rose, and brought the boy to himself at last, in no +comfortable condition. He opened his eyes, scrambled to his feet, and +stared wildly around him. + +“Where is it?” he cried. + +“Where’s what?” rejoined Clare, leaving the bellows, and taking a hold +of him lest he should fall off. + +“The head that flew out of the water-butt,” answered Tommy with a +shudder. + +“Have you lost your senses, Tommy?” remonstrated Clare. “I found you +lying on a heap of old iron against the wall, with the moon shining on +you.” + +“Yes, yes!--the moon! She jumped out of the water-butt, and got a hold +of me as I was getting down. I knew she would!” + +“I didn’t think you were such a fool, Tommy!” said Clare. + +“Well, you hadn’t the pluck to go yourself! You stopt in!” cried +Tommy, putting his hand to his head, but more sorely hurt that an +idiot should call him a fool. + +“Come and let me see, Tommy,” said Clare. + +He wanted to find out if he was much hurt; but Tommy thought he wanted +to go to the water-butt, and screamed. + +“Hold your tongue, you little idiot!” cried Clare. “You’ll have all +the world coming after us! They’ll think I’m murdering you!” + +Tommy restrained himself, and gradually recovering, told Clare what he +had discovered, but not what he had found. + +“There’s something yellow on your jacket! What is it?” said Clare. “I +do believe--yes, it is!--you’ve been eating an egg! Now I remember! I +saw egg-shells, more than two or three, lying in the yard, and the +poor hen walking about looking for her eggs! You little rascal! You +pig of a boy! I won’t thrash you this time, because you’ve fetched +your own thrashing. But--!” + +He finished the sentence by shaking his fist in Tommy’s face, and +looking as black at him as he was able. + +“I do believe it was the hen herself that frighted you!” he added. +“She served you right, you thief!” + +“I didn’t know there was any harm,” said Tommy, pretending to sob. + +“Why didn’t you bring me my share, then?” + +“’Cos I knowed you’d ha’ made me give ’em back to the hen!” + +“And you didn’t know there was any harm, you lying little brute!” + +“No, I didn’t.” + +“Now, look here, Tommy! If you don’t mind what I tell you, you and I +part company. One of us two must be master, and I will, or you must +tramp. Do you hear me?” + +“I can’t do without wictuals!” whimpered Tommy. “I didn’t come wi’ +_you_ a purpose to be starved to death!” + +“I dare say you didn’t; but when I starve, you must starve too; and +when I eat, you shall have the first mouthful. What did you come with +me for?” + +“’Acos you was the strongest,” answered Tommy, “an’ I reckoned you +would get things from coves we met!” + +“Well, I’m not going to get things from coves we meet, except they +give them to me. But have patience, Tommy, and I’ll get you all you +can eat. You must give me time, you know! I ain’t got work yet!--Come +here. Lie down close to me, and we’ll go to sleep.” + +The urchin obeyed, pillowed his head on Clare’s chest, and went fast +asleep. + +Clare slept too after a while, but the necessities of his relation to +Tommy were fast making a man of him. + + + + + Chapter XXII. + + THE SMITH IN A RAGE. + + +They had not slept long, when they were roused by a hideous clamour +and rattling at the door, and thunderous blows on the wooden sides of +the shed. Clare woke first, and rubbed his eyelids, whose hinges were +rusted with sleep. He was utterly perplexed with the uproar and +romage. The cabin seemed enveloped in a hurricane of kicks, and the +air was in a tumult of howling and brawling, of threats and curses, +whose inarticulateness made them sound bestial. There never came pause +long enough for Clare to answer that they were locked in, and that the +smith must have the key in his pocket. But when Tommy came to himself, +which he generally did the instant he woke, but not so quickly this +time because of his fall, he understood at once. + +“It’s the blacksmith! He’s roaring drunk!” he said. “Let’s be off, +Clare! The devil ’ill be to pay when he gets in! He’ll murder us in +our beds!” + +“We ought to let him into his own house if we can,” replied Clare, +rising and going to the door. It was well for him that he found no way +of opening it, for every instant there came a kick against it that +threatened to throw it from lock and hinges at once. He protested his +inability, but the madman thought he was refusing to admit him, and +went into a tenfold fury, calling the boys hideous names, and swearing +he would set the shed on fire if they did not open at once. The boys +shouted, but the man had no sense to listen with, and began such a +furious battery on the door, with his whole person for a ram, that +Tommy made for the rear, and Clare followed--prudent enough, however, +in all his haste, to close the back-door behind them. + +Tommy was in front, and led the way to the bottom of the yard, and +over the fence into the waste ground, hoping to find some point in +that quarter where he could mount the wall. He could not face the +water-butt--with the moon in it, staring out of the immensity of the +lower world. He ran and doubled and spied, but could find no +foothold. Least of all was ascent possible at the spot where the door +stood on the other side; the bricks were smoother than elsewhere. He +turned the corner and ran along a narrow lane, Clare still following, +for he thought Tommy knew what he was about; but Tommy could find no +encouragement to attempt scaling the wall. They might have fled into +the fields that lay around; but the burrowing instinct was strong, and +the deserted house drew them. Then Clare, finding Tommy at fault, +bethought him that the little rascal had got up by the heap on which +he discovered him, and must be afraid to go that way again. He faced +about and ran, in his turn become leader. Tommy wheeled also, and +followed, but with misgiving. When they reached the farther corner of +the bottom wall, they stopped and peeped round before they would turn +it: they might run against the blacksmith in chase of them! But the +sound of his continued hammering at the door came to them, and they +went on. They crossed the fence and ran again, ran faster, for now +every step brought them nearer to their danger: the heap of iron lay +between them and the smithy, and any moment the smith might burst into +the shed, rush through, and be out upon them. + +They reached the heap. Clare sprang up; and Tommy, urged on the one +side by the fear of the drunken smith, and drawn on the other by the +dread of being abandoned by Clare, climbed shuddering after him. + +“Mind the water-butt, Clare!” he gasped; “an’ gi’ me a hand up.” + +Clare had already turned on the top of the wall to help him. + +“Now let me go first!” said Tommy, the moment he had his foot on +it. “I know how to get down.” + +He scudded along the wall, glad to have Clare between him and the +butt. Clare followed swiftly. He was not so quick on the cat-promenade +as Tommy, but he had a good head, and was spurred by the apprehension +of being seen up there in the moonlight. + + + + + Chapter XXIII. + + TREASURE TROVE. + + +In a few moments they were safe in the thicket at the foot of what had +been their enemy and was now their friend--the garden-wall. How many +things and persons there are whose other sides are altogether +friendly! These are their true selves, and we must be true to get at +them. + +Tommy again took the lead, though with a fresh sinking of the heart +because of that other place with the moon in it. Through the tangled +thicket they made or found their way--and there stood the house, with +the moon looking down on its roof, and the drunkard’s thunder +troubling her still pale light--her _moon-thinking_. But for the noise +and the haste, Clare would have been frightened at them. There seemed +some secret between the house and the moon which they were determined +no one else should share. They were of one mind to terrify man or boy +who should attempt to cross the threshold! There was no time, however, +to heed such fancies. “If we could only get in without spoiling +anything!” thought Clare. Once in, they would hurt nothing, take but +the shelter and rest lying there of no good to anybody, and leave them +there all the same when they had done with them! + +While they stood looking at the house, the thundering at the door of +the smithy ceased. Presently they heard voices in altercation. One +voice was that of the smith, quieter than when last they heard it, but +ill-tempered and growling as at first. The other seemed that of a +woman. She had been able so far to quiet him, probably, that he +remembered he had the key in his pocket; for they thought they heard +the door of the smithy open. Then all was silent, and the outcasts +pursued their quest of an entrance to the house. + +Clare went ferreting as Tommy had done. He also tried to get a peep +through the window with the swinging shutter, but had no better +success than Tommy. Then he started to go round the corner next the +blacksmith’s yard. + +“Look out!” cried Tommy in a loud whisper, when he saw where he was +going. + +“Why?” asked Clare. + +“Because there’s a horrible hole there, full of water,” answered +Tommy. + +“I’ll keep a look out,” returned Clare, and went. + +When he was about half-way along the end of the house, he heard a +noise he did not understand, and stopped to listen. Some one seemed +moving somewhere. + +Then came a kind of scrambling sound, and presently the noise of a +great watery splash. Clare shivered from head to foot. + +“Something has fallen into the hole Tommy mentioned!” he said to +himself, and ran on to see. A few steps brought him to what Tommy had +taken for a great hole. It was nothing but a pool of rain-water: the +splash could not have come from that! + +Then it occurred to him that the water-butt could not be far off. He +forced his way through shrubs of various kinds, and reaching the wall, +went back along it until he came to the butt. A ray of moonlight showed +him that the side of it was wet, as if the water had lately come over +the edge. He looked about for some means of getting a peep into the +huge thing. It stood on a brick stand, of which it left a narrow edge +clear, but on this edge the bulge of the butt would not permit him to +mount. With the help of a small tree, however, he got on the wall, +which was better. + +Spying into the butt, he could see nothing at first, for a chimney was +now between it and the moon. A moment more, however, and he descried +something white in the dull iron gleam of the water. It was under the +water, but floating near the surface. He lay down on the wall, plunged +his arm into the butt, laid hold of it, and drew it out. It was a +little heavy for the size, for what should it be but a tiny baby, in a +flannel night-gown, which, as he drew it out, sent back little noisy +streams into the butt! It lay perfectly still in his arms, he did not +know whether dead or alive, but he thought it could hardly be drowned +so soon after the splash. It had been drugged, and the antagonism of +the two means employed to kill it was probably the saving of its life. + +Clare stood in stony bewilderment. What was he to do? Certainly not to +go after the mother! The first thing was to get it down from the +wall. That he could easily have done on the other side, by the heap; +but that was the side whence it must have been thrown, and they would +be but in worse difficulty there! He must get the baby down inside the +wall! With at least one arm occupied, the tree-way was impracticable. +There was only one other way, and that full of danger! But where there +is only one way, that way must be taken, and Clare did not hesitate. +He started along the top of the wall, with the poor unconscious germ +of humanity in his arms. He had lifted it from its watery coffin, out +of the cold arms of death, up into the clear air of life! True, that +air was cold, and filled only with moonshine; but there was the house +whose seal might be broken! and the moon saw the sun making warm the +under world! Along the narrow way, through the still, keen glimmer, +unseen, probably, by any eye in the sleeping town, he bore his burden, +speeding as fast as he dared, for he must not set a foot down amiss! + +Had any one caught sight of him, what a commotion would not the tale +have roused--of the spectre of a boy with a baby in his arms, gliding +noiseless in the moon and the middle night, along the top of the high +brick wall of a deserted house, where no one had lived within the +memory of man! + +When he reached the door-ladder, he found descent difficult but +possible. It was more difficult to make his way through the tangled +bushes without scratching the baby, which, after all, might, alas, be +beyond hurt! He held it close to his bosom, life coaxing life to “stay +a little.” + +Thus laden, he appeared before Tommy, who had heard the splash, and +thought Clare had fallen into the deep hole, but had not had courage +to go and see, partly from the fear of verifying his fear, but more +from his horror of the watery abyss. He stood trembling where Clare +had left him. + +To save the baby was now Clare’s only thought. The baby was now the +one thing in the universe! If only the light that shone on it were +that of the hot sun instead of the cold moon, which looked far more +like killing than bringing to life! “And,” thought Clare with himself, +“there ain’t much more heat in my body than in that shivery moon!” But +the sun would wake and mount the sky, and send the moon down, and all +would be different! Only, if nothing could be done in the meantime, +where would baby be by then! + +“Here, Tommy,” he cried, “come and see what I found in the water-butt.” + +At the word, Tommy turned to flee; but confidence in Clare, and +curiosity to see what, in Clare’s arms, could hardly hurt him, +prevailed, and he drew near cautiously. + +“Lord, it’s a kid!” he cried. + +“It’s not a kid,” said Clare, who had no slang; “it’s a baby!” + +“Well! ain’t a baby a kid, just?” + +Tommy did not know that the word stood for anything else than a child, +which was indeed its meaning long before it was specially applied to +the young of the goat. A _kidnapper_ or _kidnabber_ is a stealer of +children. Mr. Skeat tells us that _kid_ meant at first just a young +one. + +“You can’t tell me what to do with it, I’m afraid, Tommy!” said Clare. + +Already it was as if from all eternity he had loved this helpless +little waif of Time, with its small, thin, blue-gray, gin-drugged +face; this tiny life, so hopeless, so miserable, yet so uncomplaining: +the thing that was, was the thing for it to bear; it had come into the +world to bear it! Ready to die, even Death would not have it; it must +live where it was not wanted, where it was not welcome! + +“Yes, I can!” answered Tommy with evil promptitude. “Put it in again.” + +“But that would drown it, you know, Tommy!” answered Clare, treating +him like the child he was not. “We want it to live, Tommy!” + +His tenderness for the baby made him speak with foolish gentleness. + +“No, we don’t!” returned Tommy. “What business has _it_ to live, when +we can’t get nothing to eat?” + +Clare held faster to the baby with one arm, and with the fist of the +other struck straight out at Tommy, hit him between the eyes, and +knocked him flat. It was a miserable thing to have to do, and it made +Clare miserable, for Tommy was not half his size, and was still +suffering from his fall on the iron. But then the dying baby was not +half Tommy’s size, and any milder argument would have been lost on +him: he was thus sent on the way to understand that the baby had +rights; and that if the baby could not enforce them, there was one in +the world that could and would. Never in his life did Clare show more +instinctive wisdom than in that knock-down blow to the hardly blamable +little devil! + +Tommy got up at once. He was not much hurt, for he had a hard head +though he was easily knocked over. From that moment he began to +respect Clare. He had loved him before in a way; he had patronized +him, and feared to offend him because he was stronger than he; but +until now he had had no respect for him, believing little Tommy a much +finer fellow than big Clare. There are thousands for whom a blow is a +better thing than expostulation, persuasion, or any sort of +kindness. They are such that nothing but a blow will set their door +ajar for love to get in. That is why hardships, troubles, +disappointments, and all kinds of pain and suffering, are sent to so +many of us. We are so full of ourselves, and feel so grand, that we +should never come to know what poor creatures we are, never begin to +do better, but for the knock-down blows that the loving God gives us. +We do not like them, but he does not spare us for that. + + + + + Chapter XXIV. + + JUSTIFIABLE BURGLARY. + + +Tommy rose rubbing his forehead, and crying quietly. He did not dare +say a word. It was well for him he did not. Clare, perplexed and +anxious about the baby, was in no mood to accept annoyance from +Tommy. But the urchin remaining silent, the elder boy’s indignation +began immediately to settle down. + +The infant lay motionless, its little heart beating doubtfully, like +the ticking of a clock off the level, as if the last beat might be +indeed the last. + +“We _must_ get into the house, Tommy!” said Clare. + +“Yes, Clare,” answered Tommy, very meekly, and went off like a shot to +renew investigation at the other end of the house. He was back in a +moment, his face as radiant with success as such a face could be, with +such a craving little body under it. + +“Come, come,” he cried. “We can get in quite easy. I ha’ _been_ in!” + +The keen-eyed monkey had found a cellar-window, sunk a little below +the level of the ground--a long, narrow, horizontal slip, with a +grating over its small area not fastened down. He had lifted it, and +pushed open the window, which went inward on rusty hinges--so rusty +that they would not quite close again. That he had been in was a +lie. _He_ knew better than go first! He belonged to the school of +_No. 1!_--all mean beggars. + +Clare hastened after him. + +“Gi’ me the kid, an’ you get in; you can reach up for it better, +’cause ye’re taller,” said Tommy. + +“Is it much of a drop?” asked Clare. + +“Nothing much,” answered Tommy. + +Clare handed him the baby, instructing him how to hold it, and +threatening him if he hurt it; then laid himself on his front, shoved +his legs across the area through the window, and followed with his +body. Holding on to the edge of the window-sill, he let his feet as +far down as he could, then dropped, and fell on a heap of coals, +whence he tumbled to the floor of the cellar. + +“You should have told me of the coals!” he said, rising, and calling +up through the darkness. + +“I forgot,” answered Tommy. + +“Give me the baby,” said Clare. + +When Tommy took the baby, he renewed that moment, and began to cherish +the sense of an injury done him by the poor helpless thing. He did not +pinch it, only because he dared not, lest it should cry. When he heard +Clare fall on the coals, and then heard him call up from the depth of +the cellar, he was greatly tempted to turn with it to the other end of +the house, and throw it in the pool, then make for the wall and the +fields, leaving Clare to shift for himself. But he durst not go near +the pool, and Clare would be sure to get out again and be after him! +so he stood with the hated creature in his unprotective arms. When +Clare called for it, he got into the shallow area, and pushed the baby +through the window, grasping the extreme of its garment, and letting +it hang into the darkness of the cellar, head downward. I believe then +the baby was sick, for, a moment after, and before Clare could get a +hold of it, it began to cry. The sound thrilled him with delight. + +“Oh, the darling!--Can’t you let her down a bit farther, Tommy?” he +said, with suppressed eagerness. + +He had climbed on the heap of coals, and was stretching up his arms to +receive her. In the faint glimmer from the diffused light of the moon, +he could just distinguish the window, blocked up by Tommy; the baby he +could not see. + +“No, I can’t,” answered Tommy. “Catch! There!” + +So saying he yielded to his spite, and waiting no sign of preparedness +on the part of Clare, let go his hold, and dropped the little one. It +fell on Clare and knocked him over; but he clasped it to him as he +fell, and they hurtled to the bottom of the coals without much damage. + +“I have her!” he cried as he got up. “Now you come yourself, Tommy.” + +He had known no baby but his lost sister, and thought of all babies as +girls. + +“You’ll catch me, won’t you, Clare?” said Tommy. + +“The thing you’ve done once you can do again! I can’t set down the +baby to catch you!” replied the unsuspicious Clare, and turned to seek +an exit from the cellar. He had not had time yet to wonder how Tommy +had got out. + +Tommy came tumbling on the top of the coals: he dared not be left with +the water-butt and the pool and the moon. + +“Where are you, Clare?” he called. + +Clare answered him from the top of the stone stair that led to the +cellar, and Tommy was soon at his heels. Going along a dark passage, +where they had to feel their way, they arrived at the kitchen. The +loose outside shutter belonged to it, and as it was open, a little of +the moonlight came in. The place looked dreary enough and cold enough +with its damp brick-floor and its rusty range; but at least they were +out of the air, and out of sight of the moon! If only they had some of +that coal alight! + +“I don’t see as we’re much better off!” said Tommy. “I’m as cold as +pigs’ trotters!” + +“Then what must baby be like!” said Clare, whose heart was brimful of +anxiety for his charge. It seemed to him he had never known misery +till now. Life or death for the baby--and he could do nothing! He was +cold enough himself, what with hunger, and the night, and the wet and +deadly cold little body in his arms; but whatever discomfort he felt, +it seemed not himself but the baby that was feeling it; he imputed it +all to the baby, and pitied the baby for the cold he felt himself. + +“We needn’t stay here, though,” he said. “There must be better places +in the house! Let’s try and find a bedroom!” + +“Come along!” responded Tommy. + +They left the kitchen, and went into the next room. It seemed warmer, +because it had a wooden floor. There was hardly any light in it, but +it felt empty. They went up the stair. When they turned on the landing +half-way, they saw the moon shining in. They went into the first room +they came to. Such a bedroom!--larger and grander than any at the +parsonage! + +“Oh baby! baby!” cried Clare, “now you’ll live--won’t you?” + +He seemed to have his own Maly an infant again in his arms. The +thought that the place was not his, and that he might get into trouble +by being there, never came to him. Use was not theft! The room and its +contents were to him as the water and the fire which even pagans +counted every man bound to hand to his neighbour. There was the bed! +Through all the cold time it had been waiting for them! The +counterpane was very dusty; and oh, such moth-eaten blankets! But +there were sheets under them, and they were quite clean, though dingy +with age! The moths--that is, their legs and wings and dried-up +bodies--flew out in clouds when they moved the blankets. Not the less +had they discovered Paradise! For the moths, they must have found it +an island of plum-cake! + +I do not know the history of the house--how it came to be shut up with +so much in it. I only know it was itself shut up in chancery, and +chancery is full of moths and dust and worms. I believe nobody in the +town knew much about it--not even the thieves. It was of course said +to be haunted, which had doubtless done something for its +protection. No one knew how long it had stood thus deserted. Nobody +thought of entering it, or was aware that there was furniture in +it. It was supposed to be somebody’s property, and that it was +somebody’s business to look after it: whether it was looked after or +not, nobody inquired. Happily for Clare and the baby and Tommy, that +was nobody’s business. + +With deft hands--for how often had he not seen his baby-sister +undressed!--Clare hurried off the infant’s one garment, gently rubbed +her little body till it was quite dry, if not very clean, and laid her +tenderly in the heart of the blankets, among the remains and eggs and +grubs of the mothy creatures--they were not wild beasts, or even +stinging things--and covered her up, leaving a little opening for her +to breathe through. She had not cried since Clare took her; she was +too feeble to cry; but, alas, there was no question about feeding her, +for he had no food to give her, were she crying ever so much! He threw +off his clothes, and got into the mothy blankets beside her. In a few +minutes he began to glow, for there was a thick pile of woolly +salvation atop of him. He took the naked baby in his arms and held her +close to his body, and they grew warmer together. + +“Now, Tommy,” he said, “you may take off your clothes, and get in on +the other side of me.” + +Tommy did not need a second invitation, and in a moment they were all +fast asleep. A few months, even a few days before, it would have been +a right painful thing to Clare to lie so near a boy like Tommy, but +suffering had taken the edge off nicety and put it on humanity. The +temple of the Lord may need cleansing, but the temple of the Lord it +is. Clare had in him that same spirit which made _the_ son of man go +beyond the healingly needful, and lay his hand--the Sinaitic +manuscript says his _hands_--upon the leper, where a word alone would +have served for the leprosy: the hands were for the man’s +heart. Repulsive danger lay in the contact, but the flesh and bones +were human, and very cold. + + + + + Chapter XXV. + + A NEW QUEST. + + +Though as comfortable as one could be who so sorely lacked food, Clare +slept lightly. His baby was heavy on his mind, and he woke very +early--woke at once to the anxious thought of a boy without food, +money, or friends, and with a hungry baby. He woke, however, with a +new train of reasoning in his mind. Babies could not work; babies +always had their food given them; therefore babies who hadn’t food had +a right to ask for it; babies couldn’t ask for it; therefore those who +had the charge of them, and hadn’t food to give them, had a right to +do the asking for them. He could not beg for himself as long as he was +able to ask for work; but for baby it was his duty to beg, because she +could not wait: she would not live till he found work. If he got work +that very day, he would have to work the whole day before he got the +money for it, and baby would be dead by that time! He crept out, so as +not to awake the sleepers, and put on his clothes. They were not dry, +but they would dry when the sun rose. He did not at all like leaving +his baby with Tommy, but what was he to do? She might as well die of +Tommy as of hunger! Perhaps it might be easier! + +He thought over the nature of the boy, and what it would be best to +say to him. He saw what many genial persons are slow to see, that +kindness, in its natural shape, is to certain dispositions a great +barrier in the way of learning either love or duty. With multitudes, +nothing but undiluted fear or pain or shame can open the door for love +to enter. + +He searched the house for a medicine-bottle, such as he had seen +plenty of at the parsonage, and found two. He chose the smaller, lest +size should provoke disinclination. Then he woke Tommy, and said to +him, + +“Tommy, I’m going out to get baby’s breakfast.” + +“Ain’t you going to give _me_ any? Is the kid to have _everything_?” + +“Tommy!” said Clare, with a steady look in his eyes that frightened +him, “your turn will come next. You won’t die of want for a day or two +yet. I’ll see to you as soon as I can. Only, remember, baby comes +first! I’m going to leave her with you. You needn’t take her up. +You’re not able to carry her. You would let her fall. But if, when I +come home, I find anything has happened to her, _I’ll put you in the +water-butt_--I WILL. And I’ll do it when the moon is in it.” + +Tommy pulled a hideous face, and began to yell. Clare seized him by +the throat. + +“Make that noise again, you rascal, and I’ll choke you. If you’re good +to baby while I’m away, I won’t eat a mouthful till you’ve had some; +if you’re not good to her, you know what will happen! You’ve got the +thing in your own hands!” + +“She’ll go an’ do something I can’t help, an’ then you’ll go for to +drown me!” + +Again he began to howl, but Clare checked him as before. “If you wake +her up, I’ll--” He had no words, and shook him for lack of any. “I +see,” he resumed, “I shall have to lock you up in the coal-cellar till +I come back! Here! come along!” + +Tommy was quiet instantly, and fell to pleading. Clare lent a gracious +ear, and yielding to Tommy’s protestations, left him with his +treasure, and set out on his quest. + +He got out through the kitchen, the rustiness of the fastenings of its +door delaying him a little, and over the wall by the imprisoned door, +taking care to lift as little as possible of his person above the +coping as he crossed. He dared not go along the wall in the daylight, +or get down in the smith’s yard; he dropped straight to the ground. + +The country was level, and casting his eyes about, he saw, at no great +distance, what looked like a farmstead. He knew cows were milked +early, but did not know what time it was. Hoping anyhow to reach the +place before the milk was put away in the pans, he set out to run +straight across the fields. But he soon found he could not run, and +had to drop into a walk. + +When he got into the yard, he saw a young woman carrying a foaming +pail of milk across to the dairy. He ran to her, and addressed her +with his usual “Please, ma’am;” but the pail was heavy, and she kept +on without answering him. Clare followed her, and looking into the +dairy, saw an elderly woman. + +“Please, ma’am, could you afford me as much fresh milk as would fill +that bottle?” he said, showing it. + +“Well, my man,” she answered pleasantly, “I think we might venture as +far without fear of the workhouse! But what on earth made you bring +such a thimble of a bottle as that?” + +“I have no money to pay for it, you see, ma’am; and I thought a little +bottle would be better to beg with; it wouldn’t be so hard on the +farmer!” + +“Bless the boy! Much good a drop of milk like that will do him!” said +the woman, turning to the girl. “Is it for your mother’s tea?” + +“No, ma’am; it’s for a baby--a very little baby, ma’am!--I think it +will hold enough,” he added, giving an anxious glance at the bottle in +his hand, “to keep her alive till I get work.” + +The woman looked, and her heart was drawn to the boy who stood gazing +at her with his whole solemn, pathetic yet strong face--with his wide, +clear eyes, his decided nose, large and straight, his rather long, +fine mouth, trembling with eager anxiety, and his confident chin. She +saw hunger in his grimy cheeks; she saw that his manners were those of +a gentleman, and his clothes poor enough for any tramp, though +evidently not made for a tramp. She would have concluded him escaped +from cruel guardians, for she was a reader of _The Family Herald_; but +that would not account for the baby! The baby did not tally! + +“How old’s the baby?” she asked. + +“I don’t know, ma’am; she only came to us last night.” + +“Who brought her?” + +She imagined the boy a simpleton, and expected one of such answers as +inconvenient questions in natural history receive from nurses. + +“I don’t know, ma’am. I took her out of the water-butt.” + +The thing grew bewildering. + +“Who put her there?” + +“I don’t know, ma’am.” + +“Whose baby is she, then?” + +“Mine, I think, ma’am.” + +“God bless the boy!” said the woman impatiently, and stared at him +speechless. + +Her daughter in the meantime had filled the phial with new milk. She +handed it to him. He grasped it eagerly. Tears of joy came in his big +hungry eyes. + +“Oh, _thank_ you, ma’am!” he said. “But, please, would you tell me,” +he continued, looking from the one to the other, “how much water I +must put in the milk to make it good for baby? I know it wants water, +but I don’t know how much!” + +“Oh, about half and half,” answered the elder woman. “Ain’t she got +no mother?” she resumed. + +“I think she must have a mother, but I daresay she’s a tramp,” +answered Clare. + +“I don’t want to give my good milk to a tramp!” she rejoined. + +“_I_’m not a tramp, please, ma’am!--at least I wasn’t till the day +before yesterday.” + +The woman looked at him out of motherly eyes, and her heart swelled +into her bosom. + +“Wouldn’t you like some milk yourself?” she said. + +“Oh, yes, ma’am!” answered Clare, with a deep sigh. + +She filled a big cup from the warm milk in the pail, and held it out +to him. He took it as a man on the scaffold might a reprieve from +death, half lifted it to his lips, then let his hand sink. It trembled +so, as he set the cup down on a shelf beside him, that he spilled a +little. He looked ruefully at the drops on the brick floor. + +“Please, ma’am, there’s Tommy!” he faltered. + +His promise to Tommy had sprung upon him like a fiery flying serpent. + +“Tommy! I thought you said the baby was a girl?” + +“Yes, the baby’s a girl; but there’s Tommy as well! He’s another of +us.” + +“Your brother, of course!” + +“No, ma’am; I’m afraid he’s a tramp. But there he is, you see, and I +must share with him!” + +It grew more and more inexplicable! + +A gruff, loud voice came from the yard. It was the farmer’s. He was a +bitter-tempered man, and his dislike of tramps was almost hatred. His +wife and daughter knew that if he saw the boy he would be worse than +rude to him. + +“There’s the master!” cried the mother. “Drink, and make haste out of +his way.” + +“If it’s stealing,--” said Clare. + +“Stealing! It’s no stealing! The dairy’s mine! I can give my milk +where I please!” + +“Well, ma’am, if the milk’s mine because you gave it me, it’s not +begging to ask you to give me a piece of bread for it! I could take a +share of that to Tommy!” + +“Run, Chris,” cried the mother, hurriedly; “take the innocent with +you--round outside the yard. Give him a hunch of bread, and let him +go. For God’s sake don’t let your father see him! Run, my boy, run! +There’s no time to drink the milk now!” + +She poured it back into the pail, and set the cup out of the way. + +There was a little passage and another door, by which they left as the +farmer entered. The kick he would have given Clare with his heavy boot +would, in its consequences, have reached the baby too. The girl ran +with him to the back of the house. + +“Wait a moment at that window,” she said. + +Now whether it was loving-kindness all, or that she dared not take the +time to divide it, I cannot tell, but she handed Clare a whole loaf, +and that a good big one, of home-made bread, and disappeared before he +could thank her, telling him to run for his life. + +He was able now. With the farmer behind, and the hungry ones before +him, he _must_ run; and with the phial in his pocket and the loaf in +his hands, he _could_ run. Happily the farmer did not catch sight of +him. His wife took care he should not. I believe, indeed, she got up a +brand-new quarrel with him on the spur of the moment, that he might +not have a chance. + + + + + Chapter XXVI. + + A NEW ENTRANCE. + + +Clare sped jubilant. But soon came a check to his jubilation: it was +one thing to drop from the wall, and quite another to climb to the top +of it without the help of the door! The same moment he heard the clink +of the smith’s hammer on his anvil, and to go by his yard in daylight +would be to risk too much! For what would become of them if their +retreat was discovered! He stood at the foot of the brick precipice, +and stared up with helpless eyes and failing strength. Baby was +inside, hungry, and with no better nurse than ill conditioned Tommy; +her milk was in his pocket, Tommy’s bread in his hand, the +insurmountable wall between him and them! He had the daylight now, +however, and there was hardly any one about: perhaps he could find +another entrance! Round the outside of the wall, therefore, like the +Midianite in the rather comical hymn, did Clare prowl and prowl. But +the wall rose straight and much too smooth wherever he looked. +Searching its face he went all along the bottom of the garden, and +then up the narrow lane between it and the garden of the next house, +with increasing fear that there was no way but by the smith’s yard, +and no choice but risk it. + +A dozen yards or so, however, from the end of the lane, where it took +a sharp turn before entering the street, he spied an opening in the +wall--the same from which, the night before, Tommy had returned with +such a frightened face. Clare went through, and found a narrow passage +running to the left for a short distance between two walls. At the +end, half on one side, half on the other of the second wall, lay the +well that had terrified Tommy. The wall crossed it with a low arch. On +the further side of the well was a third wall, with a space of about +two feet and a half between it and the side of the round well. Through +that wall there might be a door!--or, if not, there might be some way +of getting over it! To cross the well would be awkward, but he must do +it! He tied the loaf in his pocket-handkerchief--he was far past +fastidiousness, and Tommy knew neither the word nor the thing--and +knotted the ends of it round his neck. But his chief anxiety was not +to break the bottle in his jacket-pocket. He got on his knees on the +parapet. How deep and dark the water looked! For a moment he felt a +fear of it something like Tommy’s. How was he to cross the awful gulf? +It was not like a free jump; he was hemmed in before and behind, and +overhead also. But the baby drew him over the well, as the name of +Beatrice drew Dante through the fire. The baby was waiting for him, +and it had to be done! He made a cat-leap through beneath the arch, +reaching out with his hands and catching at the parapet beyond. He did +catch it, just enough of it to hold on by, so that his body did not +follow his legs into the water. Oh, how cold they found it after his +run! He held on, strained and heaved up, made a great reach across the +width of the parapet with one hand, laid hold of its outer edge, made +good his grasp on it, and drew himself out of the water, and out of +the well. + +He was in a narrow space, closed in with walls much higher than his +head, out of which he saw no way but that by which he had come +in--across the fearful well, that seemed, so dark was its water, to go +down and down for ever. + +He felt in his pocket. If then he had found baby’s bottle broken, I +doubt if Clare would ever have got out of the place, except by the +door into the next world. What little strength he had was nearly gone, +and I think it would then have gone quite. But the bottle was safe and +his courage came back. + +He examined his position, and presently saw that the narrowness of his +threatened prison would make it no prison at all. He found that, by +leaning his back against one wall, pushing his feet against the +opposite wall, and making of the third wall a rack for his shoulder, +he could worm himself slowly up. It was a task for a strong man, and +Clare, though strong for his years, was not at that moment strong. But +there was the baby waiting, and here was her milk! He fell to, and, +with an agony of exertion, wriggled himself at last to the top--so +exhausted that he all but fell over on the other side. He pulled +himself together, and dropped at once into the garden. Happier boy +than Clare was not in all England then. Hunger, wet, incipient +nakedness, for he had torn his clothes badly, were nowhere. Baby was +within his reach, and the milk within baby’s! + +He ran, dripping like a spaniel, to find her, and shot up the stair to +the room that held his treasure. To his joy he found both Tommy and +the baby fast asleep, Tommy tired out with the weary tramping of the +day before, and the baby still under the influence of the opiate her +mother had given her to make her drown quietly. + + + + + Chapter XXVII. + + THE BABY HAS HER BREAKFAST. + + +He waked Tommy, and showed him the loaf. Tommy sprang from his lair +and snatched at it. + +“No, Tommy,” said Clare, drawing back, “I can’t trust you! You would +eat it all; and if I died of hunger, what would become of baby, left +alone with you? I don’t feel at all sure you wouldn’t eat _her_!” + +Baby started a feeble whimper. + +“You must wait now till I’ve attended to her,” continued Clare. “If +you had got up quietly without waking her, I would have given you your +share at once.” + +As he spoke, he pulled a blanket off the bed to wrap her in, and made +haste to take her up. A series of difficulties followed, which I will +leave to the imagination of mothers and aunts, and nurses in +general--the worst being that there was no warm water to wash her in, +and cold water would be worse than dangerous after what she had gone +through with it the night before. Clare comforted himself that washing +was a thing non-essential to existence, however desirable for +well-being. + +Then came a more serious difficulty: the milk must be mixed with +water, and water as cold as Clare’s legs would kill the drug-dazed +shred of humanity! What was to be done? It would be equally dangerous +to give her the strong milk of a cow undiluted. There was but one way: +he must feed her as do the pigeons. First, however, he must have +water! The well was almost inaccessible: to get to it and return would +fearfully waste life-precious time! The rain-water in the little pool +must serve the necessity! It was preferable to that in the butt! + +Until many years after, it did not occur to Clare as strange that +there should be even a drop of water in that water-butt. Whence was it +fed? There was no roof near, from which the rain might run into it. If +there had ever been a pipe to supply it, surely, in a house so long +forsaken, its continuity must have given way. One always sees such +barrels empty, dry, and cracked: this one was apparently known to be +full of water, for what woman in her senses, however inferior those +senses, would throw her child into an empty butt! How did it happen to +be full? Clare was almost driven to the conclusion that it had been +filled for the evil purpose to which it was that night put. Against +this was the fact that it would not have been easy to fill such a huge +vessel by hand. I suggested that the blacksmith and his predecessors +might have used it for the purposes of the forge, and kept it and its +feeder in repair. Mr. Skymer endeavoured repeatedly to find out what +had become of the blacksmith, but never with any approach to success; +the probability being that he had left the world long before his +natural time, by disease engendered or quarrel occasioned through his +drunkenness. + +Clare laid the baby down, and fetched water from the pool. Then he +mixed the milk with what seemed the right quantity, again took the +baby up, who had been whimpering a little now and then all the time, +laid a blanket, several times folded, on his wet knees, and laid her +in her blanket upon it. These preparations made, he took a small +mouthful of the milk and water, and held it until it grew warm. It was +the only way, I condescend to remind any such reader as may think it +proper to be disgusted. When then he put his mouth to the baby’s, +careful not to let too much go at once, they managed so between them +that she successfully appropriated the mouthful. It was followed by a +second, a third, and more, until, to Clare’s delight, the child seemed +satisfied, leaving some of the precious fluid for another meal. He put +her in the bed again, and covered her up warm. All the time, Tommy had +been watching the loaf with the eyes of a wild beast. + +“Now, Tommy,” said Clare, “how much of this loaf do you think you +ought to have?” + +“Half, of course!” answered Tommy boldly, with perfect conviction of +his fairness, and pride in the same. + +“Are you as big as I am?” + +Tommy held his peace. + +“You ain’t half as big!” said Clare. + +“I’m a bloomin’ lot hungrier!” growled Tommy. + +“You had eggs last night, and I had none!” + +“That wurn’t my fault!” + +“What did you do to get this bread?” + +“I staid at home with baby.” + +“That’s true,” answered Clare. “But,” he went on, “suppose a horse and +a pony had got to divide their food between them, would the pony have +a right to half? Wouldn’t the horse, being bigger, want more to keep +him alive than the pony?” + +“Don’t know,” said Tommy. + +“But you shall have the half,” continued Clare; “only I hope, after +this, when you get anything given to you, you’ll divide it with me. I +try to be fair, and I want you to be fair.” + +Tommy made no reply. He did not trouble himself about fair play; he +wanted all he could get--like most people; though, thank God, I know a +few far more anxious to give than to receive fair play. Such men, be +they noblemen or tradesmen, I worship. + +Clare carefully divided the loaf, and after due deliberation, handed +Tommy that which seemed the bigger half. Without a word of +acknowledgment, Tommy fell upon it like a terrier. He would love Clare +in a little while when he had something more to give--but stomach +before heart with Tommy! His sort is well represented in every +rank. There are not many who can at the same time both love and be +hungry. + + + + +Chapter XXVIII. + +TREACHERY. + + +“Now, Tommy,” said Clare, having eaten his half loaf, “I’m going out +to look for work, and you must take care of baby. You’re not to feed +her--you would only choke her, and waste the good milk.” + +“I want to go out too,” said Tommy. + +“To see what you can pick up, I suppose?” + +“That’s my business.” + +“I fancy it mine while you are with me. If you don’t take care of baby +and be good to her, I’ll put you in the water-butt I took her out +of--as sure as you ain’t in it now!” + +“That you shan’t!” cried Tommy; “I’ll bite first!” + +“I’ll tie your hands and feet, and put a stick in your mouth,” said +Clare. “So you’d better mind.” + +“I want to go with you!” whimpered Tommy. + +“You can’t. You’re to stop and look after baby. I won’t be away longer +than I can help; you may be sure of that.” + +With repeated injunctions to him not to leave the room, Clare went. + +Before going quite, however, he must arrange for returning. To swarm +up between the two walls as he had done before, would be to bid +good-bye to his jacket at least, and he knew how appearances were +already against him. Spying about for whatever might serve his +purpose, he caught sight of an old garden-roller, and was making for +it, when Tommy, never doubting he was gone, came whistling round the +corner of the house with his hands in his pocket-holes, and an +impudent air of independence. Clare away, he was a lord in his own +eyes! He could kill the baby when he pleased! Plainly his mood was, +“He thinks I’m going to do as he tells me! Not if I knows it!” Clare +saw him before he saw Clare, and rushed at him with a roar. + +“You thought I was gone!” he cried. “I told you not to leave the room! +Come along to the water-butt!” + +Tommy shivered when he heard him, and gave a shriek when he saw him +coming. He shook till his teeth chattered. But terror not always +paralyzes instinct in the wild animal. As Clare came running, he took +one step toward him, and dropped on the ground at his feet. Clare shot +away over his head, struck his own against a tree, and lay for a +minute stunned. Tommy’s success was greater than he had hoped. He +scudded into the house, and closed and bolted the door to the kitchen. + +When Clare came to himself, he found he had a cut on his head. It +would never do to go asking for work with a bloody face! The little +pool served at once for basin and mirror, and while he washed he +thought. + +He had no inclination to punish Tommy for the trick he had played him; +he had but done after his kind! It would serve a good end too: Tommy +would imagine him lurking about to have his revenge, and would not +venture his nose out. He discovered afterward that the little wretch +had made fast the cellar-door, so that, if he had entered that way, he +would have been caught in a trap, and unable to go or return. + +He got the iron roller to the foot of the wall, where he had come over +the night before, and where now first he perceived there had once been +a door; managed, with its broken handle for a lever, to set it up on +end, filled it with earth, and heaped a mound of earth about it to +steady it, placed a few broken tiles and sherds of chimney-pots upon +it, and from this rickety perch found he could reach the top easily. + +The next thing was to arrange for getting up from the other side. For +this he threw over earth and stones and whatever rubbish came to his +hand, the sole quality required in his material being, that it should +serve to lift him any fraction of an inch higher. The space was so +narrow that his mound did not require to be sustained by the width of +its base except in one direction; everywhere else the walls kept in +the heap, and he made good speed. At length he descended by it, sure +of being able to get up again. + +He had been gone an hour before Tommy dared again leave the room where +the baby was. He had planned what to do if Clare got into it: he would +threaten, if he came a step nearer, to kill the baby! But if he had +him in the coal-cellar, he would make his own conditions! A tramp +would not keep a promise, but Clare would! and until he promised not +to touch him, he should not come out--not if he died of hunger! + +At length he could bear imprisonment no longer. He opened the +room-door with the caution of one who thought a tiger might be lying +against it. He saw no one, and crept out with half steps. By slow +degrees, interrupted by many an inroad of terror and many a swift +retreat, he got down the stair and out into the garden; whence, after +closest search, he was at length satisfied his enemy had departed. For +a time he was his own master! To one like Tommy--and such are not +rare--it is a fine thing to be his own master. But the same person who +is the master is the servant--and what a master to serve! Tommy, +however, was quite satisfied with both master and servant, for both +were himself. What was he to do? Go after something to eat, of course! +He would be back long before Clare! He had gone to look for work--and +who would give _him_ work? If Tommy were as big as Clare, lots of +people would give him work! But catch him working! Not if he knew +it!--not Tommy! + +Never till she was grown up, never, indeed, until she was a +middle-aged woman and Mr. Skymer’s housekeeper, did the baby know in +what danger she was that morning, alone with surnameless Tommy. + +His first sense of relation to any creature too weak to protect +itself, was the consciousness of power to torment that creature. But +in this case the exercise of the power brought him into another +relation, one with the water-butt! He went back to the room where the +child lay in her blankets like a human chrysalis, and stood for a +moment regarding her with a hatred far from mild: was he actually +expected to give time and personal notice to that contemptible thing +lying there unable to move? _He_ wasn’t a girl or an old woman! He +must go and get something to eat! that was what a man was for! Better +twist her neck at once and go! + +But he could not forget the water-butt--proximate mother of the +child. Its idea came sliding into Tommy’s range, grew and grew upon +Tommy, came nearer and nearer, until the baby was nowhere, and nothing +in the world but the water-butt. His consciousness was possessed with +it. It was preparing to swallow him in its loathsome deep! All at once +it jumped back from him, and stood motionless by the side of the +wall. Now was his chance! Now he must mizzle! Not a moment longer +would he stop in the same place with the horrible thing! + +But the baby! Clare would bring him back and put him in the butt! No, +he wouldn’t! What harm would come to the brat? She was not able to +roll herself off the bed! She could do nothing but go to sleep again! +Out he must and would go! He wanted something to eat! He would be in +again long before Clare could get back! + +He left the room and the house, ran down the garden, scrambled up the +door, got on the top of the wall, and dropped into the waste land +behind it--nor once thought that the only way back was by the very +jaws of the water-butt. + + + + + Chapter XXIX. + + THE BAKER. + + +Clare went over the wall and the well without a notion of what he was +going to do, except look for work. He had eaten half a loaf, and now +drew in his cap some water from the well and drank. He felt better +than any moment since leaving the farm. He was full of hope. + +All his life he had never been other than hopeful. To the human being +hope is as natural as hunger; yet how few there are that hope as they +hunger! Men are so proud of being small, that one wonders to what +pitch their conceit will have arrived by the time they are nothing at +all. They are proud that they love but a little, believe less, and +hope for nothing. Every fool prides himself on not being such a fool +as believe what would make a man of him. For dread of being taken in, +he takes himself in ridiculously. The man who keeps on trying to do +his duty, finds a brighter and brighter gleam issue, as he walks, from +the lantern of his hope. + +Clare was just breaking into a song he had heard his mother sing to +his sister, when he was checked by the sight of a long skinny mongrel +like a hairy worm, that lay cowering and shivering beside a heap of +ashes put down for the dust-cart--such a dry hopeless heap that the +famished little dog did not care to search it: some little warmth in +it, I presume, had kept him near it. Clare’s own indigence made him +the more sorry for the indigent, and he felt very sorry for this +member of the family; but he had neither work nor alms to give him, +therefore strode on. The dog looked wistfully after him, as if +recognizing one of his own sort, one that would help him if he could, +but did not follow him. + +A hundred yards further, Clare came to a baker’s shop. It was the +first he felt inclined to enter, and he went in. He did not know it +was the shop from whose cart Tommy had pilfered. A thin-faced, +bilious-looking, elderly man stood behind the counter. + +“Well, boy, what do you want?” he said in a low, sad, severe, but not +unkindly voice. + +“Please, sir,” answered Clare, “I want something to do, and I thought +perhaps you could help me.” + +“What can you do?” + +“Not much, but I can _try_ to do anything.” + +“Have you ever learned to do anything?” + +“I’ve been working on a farm for the last six months. Before that I +went to school.” + +“Why didn’t you go on going to school?” + +“Because my father and mother died.” + +“What was your father?” + +“A parson.” + +“Why did you leave the farm?” + +“Because they didn’t want me. The mistress didn’t like me.” + +“I dare say she had her reasons!” + +“I don’t know, sir; she didn’t seem to like anything I did. My mother +used to say, ‘Well done, Clare!’ My mistress never said ‘Well done!’” + +“So the farmer sent you away?” + +“No, sir; but he boxed my ears for something--I don’t now remember +what.” + +“I dare say you deserved it!” + +“Perhaps I did; I don’t know; he never did it before.” + +“If you deserved it, you had no right to run away for that.” + +The baker taught in a Sunday-school, and was a good teacher, able to +make a class mind him. + +“I didn’t run away for that, sir; I ran away because he was tired of +me. I couldn’t stay to make him uncomfortable! He had been very kind +to me; I fancy it was mistress made him change. I’ve been thinking a +good deal about it, and that’s how it looks to me. I’m very sorry not +to have him or the creatures any more.” + +“What creatures?” + +“The bull, and the horses, and the cows, and the pigs--all the +creatures about the farm. They were my friends. I shall see them all +again somewhere!” + +He gave a great sigh. + +“What do you mean by that?” asked the baker. + +“I hardly know what I mean,” answered Clare. “When I’m loving anybody, +I always feel I shall see that person again some time, I don’t know +when--somewhere, I don’t know where.” + +“That don’t apply to the lower animals; it’s nothing but a foolish +imagination,” said the baker. + +“But if I love them!” suggested Clare. + +“Love a bull, or a horse, or a pig! You can’t!” asserted the baker. + +“But I _do_,” rejoined Clare. “I love my father and mother much more +than when they were alive!” + +“What has that to do with it?” returned the baker. + +“That I know I love my father and mother, and I know I love that +fierce bull that would always do what I told him, and that dear old +horse that was almost past work, and was always ready to do his +best.--I’m afraid they’ve killed him by now!” he added, with another +sigh. + +“But beasts ain’t got souls, and you can’t love them. And if you +could, that’s no reason why you should see them again.” + +“I _do_ love them, and perhaps they have souls!” rejoined Clare. + +“You mustn’t believe that! It’s quite shocking. It’s nowhere in the +Bible.” + +“Is everything that is not in the Bible shocking, sir?” + +“Well, I won’t say that; but you’re not to believe it.” + +“I suppose you don’t like animals, sir! Are you afraid of their going +to the same place as you when they die?” + +“I wouldn’t have a boy about me that held such an unscriptural notion! +The Bible says--the spirit of a man that goeth upward, and the spirit +of a beast that goeth downward!” + +“Is that in the Bible, sir?” + +“It is,” answered the baker with satisfaction, thinking he had proved +his point. + +“I’m so glad!” returned Clare. “I didn’t know there was anything about +it in the Bible! Then when I die I shall only have to go down +somewhere, and look for them till I find them!” + +The baker was silenced for a moment. + +“It’s flat atheism!” he cried. “Get out of my shop! What is the world +coming to!” + +Clare turned and went out. + +But though a bilious, the baker was not an unreasonable or unjust man +except when what he had been used to believe all his life was +contradicted. Clare had not yet shut the door when he repented. He was +a good man, though not quite in the secret of the universe. He vaulted +over the counter, and opened the door with such a ringing of its +appended bell as made heavy-hearted Clare turn before he heard his +voice. The long spare white figure appeared on the threshold, framed +in the doorway. + +“Hi!” it shouted. + +Clare went meekly back. + +“I’ve just remembered hearing--but mind I _know_ nothing, and pledge +myself to nothing----” + +He paused. + +“I didn’t say I was _sure_ about it,” returned Clare, thinking he +referred to the fate of the animals, “but I fear I’m to blame for not +being sure.” + +“Come, come!” said the baker, with a twist of his mouth that expressed +disgust, “hold your tongue, and listen to me.--I did hear, as I was +saying, that Mr. Maidstone, down the town, had one of his errand-boys +laid up with scarlet fever. I’ll take you to him, if you like. Perhaps +he’ll have you,--though I can’t say you look respectable!” + +“I ain’t had much chance since I left home, sir. I had a bit of soap, +but----” + +He bethought him that he had better say nothing about his +family. Tommy had picked his pocket of the soap the night before, and +tried to eat it, and Clare had hidden it away: he wanted it to wash +the baby with as soon as he could get some warm water; but when he +went to find it to wash his own face, it was gone. He suspected Tommy, +but before long he had terrible ground for a different surmise. + +“You see, sir,” he resumed, “I had other things to think of. When your +tummy’s empty, you don’t think about the rest of you--do you, sir?” + +The baker could not remember having ever been more than decently, +healthily hungry in his life; and here he had been rough on a +well-bred boy too hungry to wash his face! Perhaps the word _one of +these little ones_ came to him. He had some regard for him who spoke +it, though he did talk more about him on Sundays than obey him in the +days between. + +“I don’t know, my boy,” he answered. “Would you like a piece of +bread?” + +“I’m not much in want of it at this moment,” replied Clare, “but I +should be greatly obliged if you would let me call for it by and +by. You see, sir, when a man has no work, he can’t help having no +money!” + +“A man!” thought the baker. “God pity you, poor monkey!” + +He called to some one to mind the shop, removed his apron and put on a +coat, shut the door, and went down the street with Clare. + + + + + Chapter XXX. + + THE DRAPER. + + +At the shop of a draper and haberdasher, where one might buy almost +anything sold, Clare’s new friend stopped and walked in. He asked to +see Mr. Maidstone, and a shopman went to fetch him from behind. He +came out into the public floor. + +“I heard you were in want of a boy, sir,” said the baker, who carried +himself as in the presence of a superior; and certainly fine clothes +and a gold chain and ring did what they could to make the draper +superior to the baker. + +“Hm!” said Mr. Maidstone, looking with contempt at Clare. + +“I rather liked the look of this poor boy, and ventured to bring him +on approval,” continued the baker timidly. “He ain’t much to look at, +I confess!” + +“Hm!” said the draper again. “He don’t look promising!” + +“He don’t. But I think he means performing,” said the baker, with a +wan smile. + +“Donnow, I’m sure! If he ’appened to wash his face, I could tell +better!” + +Clare thought he had washed it pretty well that morning because of his +cut, though he had, to be sure, done it without soap, and had been at +rather dirty work since! + +“He says he’s been too hungry to wash his face,” answered the baker. + +“Didn’t ’ave his ’ot water in time, I suppose!--Will you answer for +him, Mr. Ball?” + +“I can’t, Mr. Maidstone--not one way or another. I simply was taken +with him. I know nothing about him.” + +Here one of the shopmen came up to his master, and said, + +“I heard Mr. Ball’s own man yesterday accuse this very boy of taking a +loaf from his cart.” + +“Yesterday!” thought Clare; “it seems a week ago!” + +“Oh! this is the boy, is it?” said the baker. “You see I didn’t know +him! All the same, I don’t believe he took the loaf.” + +“Indeed I didn’t, sir! Another boy took it who didn’t know better, and +I took it from him, and was putting it back on the cart when the man +turned round and saw me, and wouldn’t listen to a word I said. But a +working-man believed me, and bought the loaf, and gave it between us.” + +“A likely story!” said the draper. + +“I’ve heard that much,” said the baker, “and I believe it. At least I +have no reason to believe my man against him, Mr. Maidstone. That same +night I discovered he had been cheating me to a merry tune. I +discharged him this morning.” + +“Well, he certainly don’t look a respectable boy,” said the draper, +who naturally, being all surface himself, could read no deeper than +clothes; “but I’m greatly in want of one to carry out parcels, and I +don’t mind if I try him. If he do steal anything, he’ll be caught +within the hour!” + +“Oh, thank you, sir!” said Clare. + +“You shall have sixpence a day,” Mr. Maidstone continued, “--not a +penny more till I’m sure you’re an honest boy.” + +“Thank you, sir,” iterated Clare. “Please may I run home first? I +won’t be long. I ain’t got any other clothes, but----” + +“Hold your long tongue. Don’t let me hear it wagging in my +establishment. Go and wash your face and hands.” Clare turned to the +baker. + +“Please, sir,” he said softly, “may I go back with you and get the +piece of bread?” + +“What! begging already!” cried Mr. Maidstone. + +“No, no, sir,” interposed the baker. “I promised him a piece of +bread. He did not ask for it.” + +The good man was pleased at his success, and began to regard Clare +with the favour that springs in the heart of him who has done a good +turn to another through a third. Had he helped him out of his own +pocket, he might not have been so much pleased. But there had been no +loss, and there was no risk! He had beside shown his influence with a +superior! + +“I am so much obliged to you, sir!” said Clare as they went away +together. “I cannot tell you how much!” + +He was tempted to open his heart and reveal the fact that three people +would live on the sixpence a day which the baker’s kindness had +procured him, but prudence was fast coming frontward, and he saw that +no one must know that they were in that house! If it were known, they +would probably be turned out at once, which would go far to be fatal +to them as a family. For, if he had to pay for lodgings, were it no +more than the tramps paid Tommy’s grandmother, sixpence a day would +not suffice for bare shelter. So he held his tongue. + +“Thank me by minding Mr. Maidstone’s interests,” returned his +benefactor. “If you don’t do well by him, the blame will come upon +me.” + +“I will be very careful, sir,” answered Clare, who was too full of +honesty to think of being honest; he thought only of minding orders. + +They reached the shop; the baker gave him a small loaf, and he hurried +home with it. The joy in his heart, spread over the days since he left +the farm, would have given each a fair amount of gladness. + +Taking heed that no one saw him, he darted through the passage to the +well, got across it better this time, rushed over the wall like a cat, +fell on the other side from the unsteadiness of his potsherds, rose +and hurried into the house, with the feeble wail of his baby in his +ears. + + + + + Chapter XXXI. + + AN ADDITION TO THE FAMILY. + + +The door to the kitchen was open: Tommy must be in the garden again! +When he reached the nursery, as he called it to himself, he found the +baby as he had left her, but moaning and wailing piteously. She looked +as if she had cried till she was worn out. He threw down the clothes +to take her. A great rat sprang from the bed. On one of the tiny feet +the long thin toes were bleeding and raw. The same instant arose a +loud scampering and scuffling and squealing in the room. Clare’s heart +quivered. He thought it was a whole army of rats. He was not a bit +afraid of them himself, but assuredly they were not company for baby! +Already they had smelt food in the house, and come in a swarm! What +was to be done with the little one? If he stayed at home with her, she +must die of hunger; if he left her alone, the rats would eat her! They +had begun already! Oh, that wretch, Tommy! Into the water-butt he +should go! + +I hope their friends will not take it ill that, all his life after, +Clare felt less kindly disposed toward rats than toward the rest of +the creatures of God. + +But things were not nearly so bad as Clare thought: the scuffling came +from quite another cause. It suddenly ceased, and a sharp scream +followed. Clare turned with the baby in his arms. Almost at his feet, +gazing up at him, the rat hanging limp from his jaws, stood the little +castaway mongrel he had seen in the morning, his eyes flaming, and his +tail wagging with wild homage and the delight of presenting the rat to +one he would fain make his master. + +“You darling!” cried Clare, and meant the dog this time, not the +baby. The animal dropped the dead rat at his feet, and glared, and +wagged, and looked hunger incarnate, but would not touch the rat until +Clare told him to take it. Then he retired with it to a corner, and +made a rapid meal of it. + +He had seen Clare pass the second time, had doubtless noted that now +he carried a loaf, and had followed him in humble hope. Clare was too +much occupied with his own joy to perceive him, else he would +certainly have given him a little peeling or two from the outside of +the bread. But it was decreed that the dog should have the honour of +rendering the first service. Clare was not to do _all_ the +benevolences. + +What a happy day it had been for him! It was a day to be remembered +for ever! He had work! he had sixpence a day! he had had a present of +milk for the baby, and two presents of bread--one a small, and one a +large loaf! And now here was a dog! A dog was more than many meals! +The family was four now! A baby, and a dog to take care of the +baby!--It was heavenly! + +He made haste and gave his baby what milk and water was left. Then he +washed her poor torn foot, wrapped it in a pillow-case, for he would +not tear anything, and laid her in the bed. Next he cut a good big +crust from the loaf and gave it to the dog, who ate it as if the rat +were nowhere. The rest he put in a drawer. Then he washed his face and +hands--as well as he could without soap. After that, he took the dog, +talked to him a little, laid him on the bed beside the baby and talked +to him again, telling him plainly, and impressing upon him, that his +business was the care of the baby; that he must give himself up to +her; that he must watch and tend, and, if needful, fight for the +little one. When at length he left him, it was evident to Clare, by +the solemnity of the dog’s face, that he understood his duty +thoroughly. + + + + + Chapter XXXII. + + SHOP AND BABY. + + +Once clear of the well and the wall, Clare set off running like a +gaze-hound. Such was the change produced in him by joy and the +satisfaction of hope, that when he entered the shop, no one at first +knew him. His face was as the face of an angel, and none the less +beautiful that it shone above ragged garments. But Mr. Maidstone, the +moment he saw him, and before he had time to recognize him, turned +from the boy with dislike. + +“What a fool the beggar looks!” he said to himself;--then aloud to one +of the young men, “Hand over that parcel of sheets.--Here, +you!--what’s your name?” + +“Clare, sir.” + +“I declare against it!” he rejoined, with a coarse laugh of pleasure +at his own fancied wit. “I shall call you Jack!” + +“Very well, sir!” + +“Don’t you talk.--Here, Jack, take this parcel to Mrs. Trueman’s. +You’ll see the address on it.--And look sharp.--You can read, can’t +you?” + +The people in the shop stood looking on, some pitifully, all curiously, +for the parcel was of considerable size, and linen is heavy, while the +boy looked pale and thin. But Clare was strong for his age, and present +joy made up for past want. He scarcely looked at the parcel which the +draper proceeded to lay on his shoulder, stooped a little as he felt +its weight, heaved it a little to adjust its balance, and holding it in +its place with one hand, started for the door, which the master himself +held open for him. + +“Please, sir, which way do I turn?” he asked. + +“To the left,” answered Mr. Maidstone. “Ask your way as you go.” + +Clare forgot that he had heard only the lady’s name. Her address was +on the parcel, no doubt, but if he dropped it to look, he could not +get it up again by himself. A little way on, therefore, meeting a +boy about his own age returning from school, he asked him to be kind +enough to read the address on his back and direct him. The boy read it +aloud, but gave him false instructions for finding the place. Clare +walked and walked until the weight became almost unendurable, and at +last, though loath, concluded that the boy must have deceived him. +He asked again, but this time of a lady. She took pains not only to +tell him right, but to make him understand right: she was pleased with +the tired gentle face that looked up from beneath the heavy burden. +Perhaps she thought of the proud souls growing pure of their pride, in +Dante’s _Purgatorio_. Following her directions, he needed no further +questioning to find the house. But it was hours after the burden was +gone from his shoulder before it was rid of the phantom of its weight. + +His master rated him for having been so long, and would not permit him +to explain his delay, ordering him to hold his tongue and not answer +back; but the rest of his day’s work was lighter; there was no other +heavy parcel to send out. There were so many smaller ones, however, +that, by the time they were all delivered, he had gained something more +than a general idea of how the streets lay, and was a weary wight when, +with the four-pence his master hesitated to give him on the ground +that he was doubtful of his character, he set out at last, walking +soberly enough now, to spend it at Mr. Ball’s and the milk-shop. Of the +former he bought a stale three-penny loaf, and the baker added a piece +to make up the weight. Clare took this for liberality, and returned +hearty thanks, which Mr. Ball, I am sorry to say, was not man enough to +repudiate. The other penny he laid out on milk--but oh, how inferior it +was to that the farmer’s wife had given him! The milk-woman, however, +not ungraciously granted him the two matches he begged for. + +On his way to baby, he almost hoped Tommy would not return: he would +gladly be saved putting him in the water-butt! + +He forgot him again as he drew near the nursery, and for a long while +after he reached it. He found the infant and the dog lying as he +had left them. The only sign that either had moved was the strange +cleanness of the tiny gray face which Clare had not ventured to wash. +It gave indubitable evidence that the dog had been licking it more than +a little--probably every few minutes since he was left curate in charge. + +And now Clare did with deliberation a thing for which his sensitive +conscience not unfrequently reproached him afterward. His defence was, +that he had hurt nobody, and had kept baby alive by it. Having in his +mind revolved the matter many a time that day, he got some sticks +together from the garden, and with one of the precious matches lighted +a small fire of coals that were not his own, and for which he could +merely hope one day to restore amends. But baby! Baby was more than +coals! He filled a rusty kettle with water, and while it was growing +hot on the fire, such was his fear lest the smoke should betray them, +that he ran out every other minute to see how much was coming from the +chimney. + +While the fire was busy heating the water, he was busier preparing a +bottle for baby--making a hole through the cork of a phial, putting the +broken stem of a clean tobacco pipe he had found in the street through +the hole, tying a small lump of cotton wool over the end of the +pipe-stem, and covering that with a piece of his pocket-handkerchief, +carefully washed with the brown Windsor soap, his mother’s last present. +For the day held yet another gladness: in looking for a kettle he had +found the soap--which probably the rat had carried away and hidden +before finding baby. Through the pipe-stem and the wool and the +handkerchief he could without difficulty draw water, and hoped therefore +baby would succeed in drawing her supper. As soon as the water was warm +he mixed some with the milk, but not so much this time, and put the +mixture in the bottle. To his delight, the baby sucked it up splendidly. +The bottle, thought out between the heavy linen and the hard street, was +a success! Labour is not unfriendly to thought, as the annals of weaving +and shoe-making witness. + +And now at last was Clare equipped for a great attempt: he was going +to wash the baby! He was glad that disrespectful Tommy was not in the +house. With a basin of warm water and his precious piece of soap he +set about it, and taking much pains, washed his treasure perfectly +clean. It was a state of bliss in which, up to that moment, I presume, +she had never been since her birth. In the process he handled her, if +not with all the skill of a nurse, yet with the tenderness of a +mother. His chief anxiety was not to hurt, more than could not be +helped, the poor little rat-eaten toes. He felt he must wash them, but +when in the process she whimpered, it went all through the calves of +his legs. When the happy but solicitous task was over, during which +the infant had shown the submission of great weakness, he wrapped her +in another blanket, and laid her down again. Soothed and comfortable, +as probably never soothed or comfortable before, she went to sleep. + +As soon as she was out of his arms, he took a piece of bread, and with +some of the hot water made a little sop for the dog, which the small +hero, whose four legs carried such a long barrel of starvation, ate +with undisguised pleasure and thankfulness. For his own supper Clare +preferred his bread dry, following it with a fine draught of water +from the well. + +Then, and not till then, returned the thought--what had Tommy done +with himself? Left to himself he was sure to go stealing! He might +have been taken in the act! Clare could hardly believe he had actually +run away from him. On the other hand, he had left the baby, and knew +that if he returned he would be put in the water-butt! He might have +come to the conclusion that he could do better without Clare, who +would not let him steal! It was clear he did not like taking his share +in the work of the family, and looking after the baby! Had he been +anything of a true boy, Clare would have taken his bread in his hand +and gone to look for him; being such as he was, he did not think it +necessary. He felt bound to do his best for him if he came back, but +he did not feel bound to leave the baby and roam the country to find a +boy with whom baby’s life would be in constant danger. + + + + + Chapter XXXIII. + + A BAD PENNY. + + +Before Clare had done his thinking, darkness had fallen, and, weary to +the very bones, he threw himself on the bed beside the baby. The dog +jumped up and laid himself at his feet, as if the place had been his +from time immemorial--as it had perhaps been, according to time in +dog-land. The many pleasures of that blessed day would have kept Clare +awake had they not brought with them so much weariness. He fell fast +asleep. Tommy had not had a happy day: he had been found out in +evil-doing, had done more evil, and had all the day been in dread of +punishment. He did not foresee how ill things would go for him--did +not see that a rat had taken his place beside the baby, and that he +would not get back before Clare; but the vision of the water-butt had +often flashed upon his inner eye, and it had not been the bliss of his +solitude. He deserted his post in the hope of finding something to +eat, and had not had a mouthful of anything but spongy turnip, and +dried-up mangel-wurzel, or want-root. If he had been minding his work, +he would have had a piece of good bread--so good that he would have +wanted more of it, whereas, when he had eaten the turnip and the +beetroot, he had cause to wish he had not eaten so much! He had been +set upon by boys bigger than himself, and nearly as bad, who, not +being hungry, were in want of amusement, and had proceeded to get it +out of Tommy, just as Tommy would have got it out of the baby had he +dared. They bullied him in a way that would have been to his heart’s +content, had he been the bully instead of the bullied. They made him +actually wish he had stayed with the baby--and therewith came the +thought that it was time to go home if he would get back before +Clare. As to what had taken place in the morning, he knew Clare’s +forgivingness, and despised him for it. If he found the baby dead, or +anything happened to her that he could not cover with lying, it would +be time to cut and run in earnest! So the moment he could escape from +his tormenters, off went Tommy for home. But as he ran he remembered +that there was but one way into the house, and that was by the very +lip of the water-butt. + +Clare woke up suddenly--at a sound which all his life would wake him +from the deepest slumber: he thought he heard the whimpering of a +child. The baby was fast asleep. Instantly he thought of Tommy. He +seemed to see him shut out in the night, and knew at once how it was +with him: he had gone out without thinking how he was to get back, and +dared not go near the water-butt! He jumped out of bed, put on his +shoes, and in a minute or two was over the wall and walking along the +lane outside of it, to find the deserter. + +The moon was not up, and the night was dark, yet he had not looked +long before he came upon him, as near the house as he could get, +crouching against the wall. + +“Tommy!” said Clare softly. + +Tommy did not reply. The fear of the water-butt was upon him--a fear +darker than the night, an evil worse than hunger or cold--and Clare +and the water-butt were one. + +“You needn’t think to hide, Tommy; I see you, you bad boy!” whispered +Clare. “After all I said, you ran away and left the baby to the rats! +They’ve been biting her horribly--one at least has. You can stay away +as long as you like now; I’ve got a better nurse. Good-night!” Tommy +gave a great howl. + +“Hold your tongue, you rascal!” cried Clare, still in a whisper. +“You’ll let the police know where we are!” + +“Do let me in, Clare! I’m so ’ungry and so cold!” + +“Then I shall have to put you in the water-butt! I said I would!” + +“If you don’t promise not to, I’ll go straight to the police. They’ll +take the brat from you, and put her in the workhouse!” + +Clare thought for a moment whether it would not be right to kill such +a traitor. His mind was full of history-tales, and, like Dante, he +put treachery in its own place, namely the deepest hell. But with the +thought came the words he had said so many times without thinking +what they meant--“Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that +trespass against us,” and he saw that he was expected to forgive Tommy. + +“Tommy, I forgive you,” he said solemnly, “and will be friends with +you again; but I have said it, and I was right to say it, and into the +water-butt you must go! I can’t trust your word now, and I think I +shall be able to trust it after that.” + +Ere he had finished the words, Tommy lifted up his voice in a most +unearthly screech. + +Instantly Clare had him by the throat, so that he could not utter a +sound. + +“Tommy,” he said, “I’m going to let you breathe again, but the moment +you make a noise, I’ll choke you as I’m doing now.” + +With that he relaxed his hold. But Tommy had paid no heed to what he +said, and began a second screech the moment he found passage for it. +Immediately he was choked, and after two or three attempts, finally +desisted. + +“I won’t!” he said. + +“You shall, Tommy. You’re going head over in the butt. We’re going to +it now!” + +Tommy threw himself upon the ground and kicked, but dared not +scream. It was awful! He would drop right through into the great place +where the moon was! + +Clare threw him over his shoulder, and found him not half the weight +of the parcel of linen. Tommy would have bitten like a weasel, but he +feared Clare’s terrible hands. He was on the back of Giant Despair, in +the form of one of the best boys in the world. Clare took him round +the wall, and over the fence into the blacksmith’s yard. The smithy +was quite dark. + +“Please, I didn’t mean to do it!” sobbed Tommy from behind him, as +Clare bore him steadily up the yard. It was all he could do to say the +words, for the thought of what they were approaching sent a scream +into his throat every time he parted his lips to speak. + +Clare stopped. + +“What didn’t you mean to do?” he asked. + +“I didn’t mean to leave the baby.” + +“How did you do it then?” + +“I mean I didn’t mean to stay away so long. I didn’t know how to get +back.” + +“I told you not to leave her! And you could have got back perfectly, +you little coward!” + +Tommy shuddered, and said no more. Though hanging over Clare’s back, he +knew presently, by his stopping, that they had come to the heap. There +was only that heap and the wall between him and the water-butt! Up and +up he felt himself slowly, shakingly carried, and was gathering his +breath for a final utterance of agony that should rouse the whole +neighbourhood, when Clare, having reached the top, seated himself upon +the wall, and Tommy restrained himself in the hope of what a parley +might bring. But he sat down only to wheel on the pivot of his spine, +as he had seen them do on the counter in the shop, and sit with his +legs alongside of the water-butt. Then he drew Tommy from his shoulder, +in spite of his clinging, and laid him across his knees; and Tommy, +divining there were words yet to be said, and hoping to get off with a +beating, which he did not mind, remained silent. + +“Your hour is come, Tommy!” said Clare. “If you scream, I will drop +you in, and hold you only by one leg. If you don’t scream, I will hold +you by both legs. If you scream when I take you out, in you go again! +I do what I say, Tommy!” + +The wretched boy was nearly mad with terror. But now, much as he +feared the water, he feared yet more for the moment him in whom lay +the power of the water. Clare took him by the heels. + +“I’m sorry there’s no moon, as I promised you,” he said; “she won’t +come up for my calling. I should have liked you to see where you were +going. But if you ain’t an honest boy after this, you shall have +another chance; and next time we will wait for the moon!” + +With that he lifted Tommy’s legs, holding him by the ankles, and would +have shoved his body over the edge of the butt into the water. But +Tommy clung fast to his knees. + +“Leave go, Tommy,” he said, “or I’ll tumble you right in.” + +Tommy yielded, his will overcome by a greater fear. Clare let him hang +for a moment over the black water, and slowly lowered him. Tommy clung +to the side of the butt. Clare let go one leg, and taking hold of his +hands pulled them away. Tommy’s terror would have burst in a frenzied +yell, but the same instant he was down to the neck in the water, and +lifted out again. He spluttered and gurgled and tried to scream. + +“Now, Tommy,” said Clare, “don’t scream, or I’ll put you in again.” + +But Tommy never believed anything except upon compulsion. The moment +he could, that moment he screamed, and that moment he was in the water +again. The next time he was taken out, he did not scream. Clare laid +him on the wall, and he lay still, pretending to be drowned. Clare got +up, set him on his feet in front of him, and holding him by the collar, +trotted him round the top of the wall to the door, and dropped him into +the garden. He was quiet enough now--more than subdued--incapable even +of meditating revenge. But when they entered the nursery, the dog, +taking Tommy for a worse sort of rat, made a leap at him right off the +bed, as if he would swallow him alive, and the start and the terror of +it brought him quite to himself again. + +“Quiet, Abdiel!” said Clare. + +The dog turned, jumped up on the bed, and lay down again close to the +baby. + +Clare, who, I have said, was in old days a reader of _Paradise Lost_, +had already given him the name of _Abdiel_. + +“Please, I couldn’t help yelling!” said Tommy, very meekly. “I didn’t +know you’d got _him_!” + +“I know you couldn’t help it!” answered Clare. “What have you had to +eat to-day?” + +“Nothing but a beastly turnip and a wormy beet,” said Tommy. “I’m +awful hungry.” + +“You’d have had something better if you’d stuck by the baby, and not +left her to the rats!” + +“There ain’t no rats,” growled Tommy. + +“Will you believe your own eyes?” returned Clare, and showed him the +skin of the rat Abdiel had slain. “I’ve a great mind to make you eat +it!” he added, dangling it before him by the tail. + +“Shouldn’t mind,” said Tommy. “I’ve eaten a rat afore now, an’ I’m +that hungry! Rats ain’t bad to eat. I don’t know about their skins!” + +“Here’s a piece of bread for you. But you sha’n’t sleep with honest +people like baby and Abdiel. You shall lie on the hearth-rug. Here’s a +blanket and a pillow for you!” + +Clare covered him up warm, thatching all with a piece of loose carpet, +and he was asleep directly. + +The next day all terror of the water-butt was gone from the little +vagabond’s mind. He was now, however, thoroughly afraid of Clare, and +his conceit that, though Clare was the stronger, he was the cleverer, +was put in abeyance. + + + + + Chapter XXXIV. + + HOW THINGS WENT FOR A TIME. + + +Clare’s next day went much as the preceding, only that he was early at +the shop. When his dinner-hour came, he ran home, and was glad to find +Tommy and the dog mildly agreeable to each other. He had but time to +give baby some milk, and Tommy and Abdiel a bit of bread each. + +His look when he returned, a look of which he was unaware, but which +one of the girls, who had a year ago been hungry for weeks together, +could read, made her ask him what he had had for dinner. He said he +had had no dinner. + +“Why?” she asked. + +“Because there wasn’t any.” + +“Didn’t your mother keep some for you?” + +“No; she couldn’t.” + +“Then what will you do?” + +“Go without,” answered Clare with a smile. + +“But you’ve got a mother?” said the girl, rendered doubtful by his +smile. + +“Oh, yes! I’ve got two mothers. But their arms ain’t long enough,” +replied Clare. + +The girl wondered: was he an idiot, or what they called a poet? +Anyhow, she had a bun in her pocket, which she had meant to eat at +five o’clock, and she offered him that. + +“But what will you do yourself? Have you another?” asked Clare, +unready to take it. + +“No,” she answered; “why shouldn’t I go without as well as you?” + +“Because it won’t make things any better. There will be just as much +hunger. It’s only shifting it from me to you. That will leave it all +the same!” + +“No, not the same,” she returned. “I’ve had a good dinner--as much as +I could eat; and you’ve had none!” + +Clare was persuaded, and ate the girl’s bun with much satisfaction and +gratitude. + +When he had his wages in the evening, he spent them as before--a penny +for the baby, and fivepence at Mr. Ball’s for Tommy, Abdiel, and +himself. + +Observing that he came daily, and spent all he earned, except one +penny, on bread; seeing also that the boy’s cheeks, though plainly he +was in good health, were very thin, Mr. Ball wondered a little: a boy +ought to look better than that on five pennyworth of bread a day! + +They were a curious family--Clare, and Tommy, and the baby, and +Abdiel. But the only thing sad about it was, that Clare, who was the +head and the heart of it, and provided for all, should be upheld by no +human sympathy, no human gratitude; that he should be so high above +his companions that, though he never thought he was lonely, he could +not help feeling lonely. Not once did he wish himself rid of any +single member of his adopted family. It was living on his very body; +he was growing a little thinner every day; if things had gone on so, +he must before long have fallen ill; but he never thought of himself +at all, body or soul. + +He had no human sympathy or gratitude, I say, but he had both sympathy +and gratitude from Abdiel. The dog never failed to understand what +Clare wished and expected him to understand. In Clare’s absence he +took on himself the protection of the establishment, and was Tommy’s +superior. + +Though Tommy was of no use to earn bread, Clare did not therefore +allow him to be idle. He insisted on his keeping the place clean and +tidy, and in this respect Tommy was not quite a failure. He even made +him do some washing, though not much could be accomplished in that way +where there was so little to wash. Now that Abdiel was nurse, Tommy +had the run of the garden, and often went beyond it for an hour or two +without Clare’s knowledge, but always took good care to be back before +his return. + +A bale of goods happening to be unpacked in his presence one day, +Clare begged the head-shopman, who was also a partner, for a piece of +what it was wrapped in; and he, having noted how well he worked, and +being quite aware they could not get another such boy at such wages, +gave him a large piece of the soiled canvas. Now Mrs. Porson had +taught Clare to work,--as I think all boys ought to be taught, so as +not to be helpless without mother or sister,--and with the help of a +needle and some thread the friendly girl gave him, he soon made of the +packing-sheet a pair of trousers for Tommy, of a primitive but not +unserviceable cut, and a shirt for himself, of fashion more primitive +still. He managed it this way: he cut a hole in the middle of a piece +of the stuff, through which to put his head, and another hole on each +side of that, through which to put his arms, and hemmed them all +round. Then, having first hemmed the garment also, he indued it, and +let the voluminous mass arrange itself as it might, under as much of +his jacket and trousers as cohered. + +My reader may well wonder how, in what was called a respectable shop, +he could be permitted to appear in such poverty; but Mr. Maidstone +disliked the boy so much that he meant to send him away the moment he +found another to do his work, and gave orders that he should never +come up from the basement except when wanted to carry a parcel. The +fact was that his still, solemn, pure face was a haunting rebuke to +his master, although he did not in the least recognize the nature, or +this as the cause, of his dislike. + + + + + Chapter XXXV. + + CLARE DISREGARDS THE INTERESTS OF HIS EMPLOYERS. + + +Things went on for nearly a month, every one thriving but Clare. Yet +was Clare as peaceful as any, and much happier than Tommy, to whose +satisfaction adventure was needful. + +One day, a lady, attracted by a muff in the shop-window labelled with +a very low price, entered, and requested to see it. + +“We can offer you a choice from several of the sort, madam,” said the +shopman. “It is one of a lot we bought cheap, but quite uninjured, +after a fire.” + +“I want to see the one in the window,” the lady answered. + +“I hope you will excuse me, madam,” returned the shopman. “The muff is +in a position hard to reach. Besides, we must ask leave to take +anything down after the window is dressed for the day, and the master +is out. But I will bring you the same fur precisely.” + +So saying, he went, and returned presently with a load of muffs and +other furs, which he threw on the counter. But the lady had heard that +“there’s tricks i’ the world,” and persisted in demanding a sight of +the muff in the window. Being a “tall personage” and cool, she carried +her point. The muff was hooked down and brought her--not +graciously. She glanced at it, turned it over, looked inside, and +said, + +“I will take it. Please bring a bandbox for it.” + +“I will, madam,” said the man, and would have taken the muff. But she +held it fast, sought her purse, and laid the price on the counter. The +shopman saw that she knew what both of them were about, took up the +money, went and fetched a bandbox, put the muff in it before her eyes, +and tied it up. The lady held out her hand for it. + +“Shall I not send it for you, madam?” he said. + +“I do not live here,” she answered. “I am on my way to the station.” + +“Here, Jack,” cried the shopman to Clare, whom he caught sight of that +moment going down to the basement, “take this bandbox, and go with the +lady to the station.” + +If his transaction with the lady had pleased the man, he would not +have sent such a scarecrow to attend her, although she did not belong +to the town, and they might never see her again! The lady, on her +part, was about to insist on carrying the bandbox herself; but when +Clare came forward, and looked up smiling in her face, she was at once +aware that she might trust him. The man stood watching for the moment +when she should turn her back, that he might substitute another +bandbox for the one Clare carried; but Clare never looked at him, and +when the lady walked out of the shop, walked straight out after +her. Along the street he followed her steadily, she looking round +occasionally to see that he was behind her. + +They had gone about half-way to the station, when from a side street +came a lad whom Clare knew as one employed in the packing-room. He +carried a box exactly like that Clare had in his hand, and came softly +up behind him. Clare did not turn his head, for he did not want to +talk to him while he was attending on the lady. + +“Look spry!” he said in a whisper. “She don’t twig! It’s all right! +Maidstone sent me.” + +Clare looked round. The lad held out his bandbox for him to take, and +his empty hand to take Clare’s instead. But Clare had by this time +begun to learn a little caution. Besides, the lady’s interests were in +his care, and he could be party to nothing done behind her back! He +had not time to think, but knew it his duty to stick by the +bandbox. If we have come up through the animals to be what we are, +Clare must have been a dog of a good, faithful breed, for he did right +now as by some ancient instinct. He held fast to the box, neither +slackening his pace nor uttering a word. The lad gave him a great +punch. Clare clung the harder to the box. The lady heard something, +and turned her head. The boy already had his back to her, and was +walking away, but she saw that Clare’s face was flushed. + +“What is the matter?” she asked. + +“I don’t rightly know, ma’am. He wanted me to give him my bandbox for +his, and said Mr. Maidstone had sent him. But I couldn’t, you +know!--except he asked you first. You did pay for it--didn’t you, +ma’am?” + +“Of course I did, or he wouldn’t have let me take it away! But if you +don’t know what it means, I do.--You haven’t been in that shop long, +have you?” + +“Not quite a month, ma’am.” + +“I thought so!” + +She said no more, and Clare followed in silence, wondering not a +little. When they reached the station, she took the bandbox, and +looked at the boy. He returned her gaze, his gray eyes wondering. She +searched her purse for a shilling, but, unable to find one, was not +sorry to give him a half-crown instead. + +“You had better not mention that I gave you anything,” she said. + +“I will not, ma’am, except they ask me,” he answered. + +“But,” he added, his face in a glow of delight, “is all this for me?” + +“To be sure,” she answered. “I am much obliged to you for--carrying my +parcel. Be a honest boy whatever comes, and you will not repent it.” + +“I will try, ma’am,” said Clare. + +But, to speak accurately, he did not know what it was to _try_ to be +honest: he had never been tempted to be anything else, and had +scarcely had the idea of dishonesty in his mind except in relation to +Tommy. Do you say, “Then it was no merit to him”? Certainly it was +none. Who was thinking of merit? Not Clare. He is a sneak who thinks +of merit. He is a cad who can’t do a gentlemanly action without +thinking himself a fine fellow! It might be a merit in many a man to +act as Clare did, but in Clare it was pure rightness--or, if you like +the word better, righteousness. + +Clare as little thought what awaited him. Had there been any truth, +any appreciation of honesty in his vulgar heart, Mr. Maidstone could +not have done as now he did. When his messenger came back with the +tale of how he had been foiled, he said nothing, but his lips grew +white. He closed them fast, and went and stood near the door. When +Clare, unsuspecting as innocent, opened it, he was met by a blow that +dazed him, and a fierce kick that sent him on his back to the +curbstone. Almost insensible, but with the impression that something +was interfering between him and his work, he returned to the door. As +he laid his hand on it, it opened a little, and his master’s face, +with a hateful sneer upon it, shot into the crack, and spit in +his. Then the door shut so sharply that his fingers caught an +agonizing pinch. At last he understood: he was turned off, and his +day’s wages were lost! + +What would have become of him now but for the half-crown the lady had +given him! She was not _quite_ a lady, or she would have walked out of +the shop, and declined to gain by frustrating a swindle; but she was a +good-hearted woman, and God’s messenger to Clare. He bought a bigger +loaf than usual, at which, and the time of the day when he bought it, +and the half-crown presented in payment, Mr. Ball wondered; but +neither said anything--Mr. Ball from indecision, Clare from eagerness +to get home to his family. + + + + + Chapter XXXVI. + + THE POLICEMAN. + + +But, alas! Clare had made another enemy--the lad whose attempt to +change the bandboxes he had foiled. The fellow followed him, +lurkingly, all the way home--on the watch for fit place to pounce upon +him, and punish him for doing right when he wanted him to do wrong. He +saw him turn into the opening that led to the well, and thought now he +had him. But when he followed him in, he was not to be seen! He did +not care to cross the well, not knowing what might meet him on the +other side; but here was news to carry back! He did so; and his master +saw in them the opportunity of indulging his dislike and revenge, and +a means of invalidating whatever Clare might reveal to his discredit! + +Clare and the baby and Tommy and Abdiel had taken their supper with +satisfaction, and were all asleep. It was to them as the middle of the +night, though it was but past ten o’clock, when Abdiel all at once +jumped right up on his four legs, cocked his ears, listened, leaped +off the bed, ran to the door, and began to bark furiously. He was +suddenly blinded by the glare of a bull’s-eye-lantern, and received a +kick that knocked all the bark out of him, and threw him to the other +side of the room. A huge policeman strode quietly in, sending the +glare of his bull’s-eye all about the room like a vital, inquiring +glance. It discovered, one after the other, every member of the +family. So tired was Clare, however, that he did not wake until seized +by a rough hand, and at one pull dragged standing on the floor. + +“Take care of the baby!” he cried, while yet not half awake. + +“_I’ll_ take care o’ the baby, never fear!--an’ o’ you too, you young +rascal!” returned the policeman. + +He roused Tommy, who was wide awake, but pretending to be asleep, with +a gentle kick. + +“Up ye get!” he said; and Tommy got up, rubbing his ferret eyes. + +“Come along!” said the policeman. + +“Where to?” asked Clare. + +“You’ll see when you get there.” + +“But I can’t leave baby!” + +“Baby must come along too,” answered the policeman, more gently, for +he had children of his own. + +“But she has no clothes to go in!” objected Clare. + +“She must go without, then.” + +“But she’ll take cold!” + +“She don’t run naked in the house, do she?” + +“No; she can’t run yet. I keep her in a blanket. But the blanket ain’t +mine; I can’t take it with me.” + +“You’re mighty scrup’lous!” returned the policeman. “You don’t mind +takin’ a ’ole ’ouse an’ garding, but you wouldn’ think o’ takin’ a +blanket!--Oh, no! Honest boy _you_ are!” + +He turned sharp round, and caught Tommy taking a vigorous sight at +him. Tommy, courageous as a lion behind anybody’s back, dropped on the +rug sitting. + +“We’ve done the house no harm,” said Clare, “and I will _not_ take the +blanket. It would be stealing!” + +“Then I will take it, and be accountable for it,” rejoined the man. “I +hope that will satisfy you!” + +“Certainly,” answered Clare. “You are a policeman, and that makes it +all right.” + +“Rouse up then, and come along. I want to get home.” + +“Please, sir, wouldn’t it do in the morning?” pleaded Clare. “I’ve no +work now, and could easily go then. That way we should all have a +sleep.” + +“My eye ain’t green enough,” replied the policeman. “Look sharp!” + +Clare said no more, but went to the baby. With sinking but courageous +heart, he wrapped her closer in her blanket, and took her in his +arms. He could not help her crying, but she did not scream. Indeed she +never really screamed; she was not strong enough to scream. + +“Get along,” said the policeman. + +Clare led the way with his bundle, sorely incommoded by the size and +weight of the wrapping blanket, the corners of which, one after the +other, would keep working from his hold, and dropping and trailing on +the ground. Behind him came Tommy, a scarecrow monkey, with +mischievous face, and greedy beads for eyes--type not unknown to the +policeman, who brought up the rear, big enough to have all their sizes +cut out of him, and yet pass for a man. Down the stair they went, and +out at the front door, which Clare for the first time saw open, and so +by the iron gate into the street. + +[Illustration: CLARE, TOMMY, AND THE BABY IN CUSTODY.] + +“Which way, please?” asked Clare, turning half round with the +question. + +“To the right, straight ahead. The likes o’ you, young un, might know +the way to the lock-up without astin’!” + +Clare made no answer, but walked obedient. It was a sad +procession--comical indeed, but too sad when realized to continue +ludicrous. The thin, long-bodied, big-headed, long-haired, long-tailed, +short-legged animal that followed last, seemed to close it with a +never-ending end. + +There was no moon; nothing but the gas-lamps lighted Clare’s _Via +dolorosa_. He hugged the baby and kept on, laying his cheek to hers to +comfort her, and receiving the comfort he did not seek. + +They came at last to the _lock-up_, a new building in the rear of the +town-house. There this tangle of humanity, torn from its rock and +afloat on the social sea, drifted trailing into a bare brilliant room, +and at its head, cast down but not destroyed, went heavy-laden Clare, +with so much in him, but only his misery patent to eyes too much used +to misery to reap sorrow from the sight. + +The head policeman--they called him the inspector--received the +charge, that of house-breaking, and entered it. Then they were taken +away to the lock-up--all but the faithful Abdiel, who, following, +received another of the kicks which that day rained on every member of +that epitome of the human family except the baby, who, small enough +for a mother to drown, was too small for a policeman to kick. The door +was shut upon them, and they had to rest in that grave till the +resurrection of the morning should bring them before the magistrate. + +Their quarters were worse than chilly--to all but the baby in her +blanket manifoldly wrapped about her, and in Clare’s arms. Tommy would +gladly have shared that blanket, more gladly yet would have taken it +all for himself and left the baby to perish; but he had to lie on the +broad wooden bench and make the best of it, which he did by snoring +all the night. It passed drearily for Clare, who kept wide awake. He +was not anxious about the morrow; he had nothing to be ashamed of, +therefore nothing to fear; but he had baby to protect and cherish, and +he dared not go to sleep. + + + + + Chapter XXXVII. + + THE MAGISTRATE. + + +The dawn came at last, and soon after the dawn footsteps, but they +approached only to recede. When the door at length opened, it was but +to let a pair of eyes glance round on them, and close again. The hours +seemed to be always beginning, and never going on. But at the long +last came the big policeman. To Clare’s loving eyes, how friendly he +looked! + +“Come, kids!” he said, and took them through a long passage to a room +in the town-hall, where sat a formal-looking old gentleman behind a +table. + +“Good morning, sir!” said Clare, to the astonishment of the +magistrate, who set his politeness down as impudence. + +Nor was the mistake to be wondered at; for the baby in Clare’s arms +hid, with the mountain-like folds of its blanket, the greater part of +his face, and the old gentleman’s eyes fell first on Tommy; and if +ever _scamp_ was written clear on a countenance, it was written clear +on Tommy’s. + +“Hold your impudent tongue!” said a policeman, and gave Clare a cuff +on the head. + +“Hold, John,” interposed the magistrate; “it is my part to punish, not +yours.” + +“Thank you, sir,” said Clare. + +“I will thank _you_, sir,” returned the magistrate, “not to speak till +I put to you the questions I am about to put to you.--What is the +charge against the prisoners?” + +“Housebreaking, sir,” answered the big man. + +“What! Housebreaking! Boys with a baby! House-breakers don’t generally +go about with babies in their arms! Explain the thing.” + +The policeman said he had received information that unlawful +possession had been taken of a building commonly known as The Haunted +House, which had been in Chancery for no one could tell how many +years. He had gone to see, and had found the accused in possession of +the best bedroom--fast asleep, surrounded by indications that they had +made themselves at home there for some time. He had brought them +along. + +The magistrate turned his eyes on Clare. + +“You hear what the policeman says?” he said. + +“Yes, sir,” answered Clare. + +“Well?” + +“Sir?” + +“What have you to say to it?” + +“Nothing, sir.” + +“Then you allow it is true?” + +“Yes, sir.” + +“What right had you to be there?” + +“None, sir. But we had nowhere else to go, and nobody seemed to want +the place. We didn’t hurt anything. We swept away a multitude of dead +moths, and killed a lot of live ones, and destroyed a whole granary of +grubs; and the dog killed a great rat.” + +“What is your name?” + +“Clare--Porson,” answered Clare, with a little intervening hesitation. + +“You are not quite sure?” + +“Yes; that is my name; but I have another older one that I don’t +know.” + +“A bad answer! The name you go by is not your own! Hum! Is that boy +your brother?” + +“No, sir.” + +“Your cousin?” + +“No, sir; he’s not any relation of mine. He’s a tramp.” + +“And what are you?” + +“Something like one now, sir, but I wasn’t always.” + +“What were you?” + +“Not much, sir. I didn’t _do_ anything till just lately.” + +He could not bear at the moment to talk of his beloved dead. He felt +as if the old gentleman would be rude to them. + +“Is the infant there your sister?” + +“She’s my sister the big way: God made her. She’s not my sister any +other way.” + +“How does she come to be with you then?” + +“I took her out of the water-butt. Some one threw her in, and I heard +the splash, and went and got her out.” + +“Why did you not take her to the police?” + +“I never thought of that. It was all I could do to keep her alive. I +couldn’t have done it if we hadn’t got into the house.” + +“How long ago is that?” + +“Nearly a month, sir.” + +“And you’ve kept her there ever since?” + +“Yes, sir--as well as I could. I had only sixpence a day.” + +“And what’s that boy’s name?” + +“Tommy, sir.--I don’t know any other.” + +“Nice respectable company you keep for one who has evidently been well +brought up!” + +“Baby’s quite respectable, sir!” + +“Hum!” + +“And for Tommy, if I didn’t keep him, he would steal. I’m teaching him +not to steal.” + +“What woman have you got with you?” + +“Baby’s the only woman we’ve got, sir.” + +“But who attends to her?” + +“I do, sir. She only wants washing and rolling round in the blanket; +she’s got no clothes to speak of. When I’m away, Tommy and Abdiel take +care of her.” + +“Abdiel! Who on earth is that? Where is he?” said the magistrate, +looking round for some fourth member of the incomprehensible family. + +“He’s not on earth, sir; he’s in heaven--the good angel, you know, +sir, that left Satan and came back again to God.” + +“You must take him to the county-asylum, James!” said the magistrate, +turning to the tall policeman. + +“Oh, he’s all right, sir!” said James. + +“Please, sir,” interrupted Clare eagerly, “I didn’t mean the dog was +in heaven yet. I meant the angel I named him after!” + +“They _had_ a little dog with them, sir!” + +“Yes--Abdiel. He wanted to be a prisoner too, but they wouldn’t let +him in. He’s a good dog--better than Tommy.” + +“So! like all the rest of you, you can keep a dog!” + +“He followed me home because he hadn’t anybody to love,” said +Clare. “He don’t have much to eat, but he’s content. He would eat +three times as much if I could give it him; but he never complains.” + +“Have you work of any sort?” + +“I had till yesterday, sir.” + +“Where?” + +“At Mr. Maidstone’s shop.” + +“What wages had you?” + +“Sixpence a day.” + +“And you lived, all three of you, on that?” + +“Yes; all four of us, sir.” + +“What do you do at the shop?” + +“Please your worship,” interposed policeman James, “he was sent about +his business yesterday.” + +“Yes,” rejoined Clare, who did not understand the phrase, “I was sent +with a lady to carry her bandbox to the station.” + +“And when you came back, you was turned away, wasn’t you?” said James. + +“Yes, sir.” + +“What had you done?” asked the magistrate. + +“I don’t quite know, sir.” + +“A likely story!” + +Clare made no reply. + +“Answer me directly.” + +“Please, sir, you told me not to speak unless you asked me a +question.” + +“I said, ‘A likely story!’ which meant, ‘Do you expect me to believe +that?’” + +“Of course I do, sir.” + +“Why?” + +“Because it is true.” + +“How am I to believe that?” + +“I don’t know, sir. I only know I’ve got to speak the truth. It’s the +person who hears it that’s got to believe it, ain’t it, sir?” + +“You’ve got to prove it.” + +“I don’t think so, sir; I never was told so; I was only told I must +speak the truth; I never was told I must prove what I said.--I’ve been +several times disbelieved, I know.” + +“I should think so indeed!” + +“It was by people who did not know me.” + +“Never by people who did know you?” + +“I think not, sir. I never was by the people at home.” + +“Ah! you could not read what they were thinking!” + +“Were you not believed when you were at home, sir?” + +The magistrate’s doubt of Clare had its source in the fact that, +although now he was more careful to speak the truth than are most +people, it was not his habit when a boy, and he had suffered severely +in consequence. He was annoyed, therefore, at his question, set him +down as a hypocritical, boastful prig, and was seized with a strong +desire to shame him. + +“I remand the prisoner for more evidence. Take the children to the +workhouse,” he said. + +Tommy gave a sudden full-sized howl. He had heard no good of the +workhouse. + +“The baby is mine!” pleaded Clare. + +“Are you the father of it?” said the big policeman. + +“Yes, I think so: I saved her life.--She would have been drowned if I +hadn’t looked for her when I heard the splash!” reasoned Clare, his +face drawn with grief and the struggle to keep from crying. + +“She’s not yours,” said the magistrate. “She belongs to the +parish. Take her away, James.” + +The big policeman came up to take her. Clare would have held her +tight, but was afraid of hurting her. He did draw back from the +outstretched hands, however, while he put a question or two. + +“Please, sir, will the parish be good to her?” he asked. + +“Much better than you.” + +“Will it let me go and see her?” he asked again, with an outbreaking +sob. + +“You can’t go anywhere till you’re out of this,” answered the big +policeman, and, not ungently, took the baby from him. + +“And when will that be, please?” asked Clare, with his empty arms +still held out. + +“That depends on his worship there.” + +“Hold your tongue, James,” said the magistrate. “Take the boy away, +John.” + +“Please, sir, where am I going to?” asked Clare. + +“To prison, till we find out about you.” + +“Please, sir, I didn’t mean to steal her. I didn’t know the parish +wanted her!” + +“Take the boy away, I tell you!” cried the magistrate angrily. “His +tongue goes like the hopper of a mill!” + +James, carrying the baby on one arm, was already pushing Tommy before +him by the neck. Tommy howled, and rubbed his red eyes with what was +left him of cuffs, but did not attempt resistance. + +“Please, don’t let anybody hold her upside down, policeman!” cried +Clare. “She doesn’t like it!--Oh, baby! baby!” + +John tightened his grasp on his arm, and hurried him away in another +direction. + +Where the big policeman issued with his charge, there was Abdiel +hovering about as if his spring were wound up so tight that it +wouldn’t go off. How he came to be at that door, I cannot imagine. + +When he spied Tommy, he rushed at him. Tommy gave him a kick that +rolled him over. + +“Don’t want _you_, you mangy beast!” he said, and tried to kick him +again. + +Abdiel kept away from him after that, but followed the party to the +workhouse, where also, to his disgust, plainly expressed, he was +refused admittance. He returned to the entrance by which Clare had +vanished from his eyes the night before, and lay down there. I suspect +he had an approximate canine theory of the whole matter. He knew at +least that Clare had gone in with the others at that door; that he had +not come out with them at the other door; that, therefore, in all +probability, he was within that door still. + +The police made inquiry at Mr. Maidstone’s shop. Reasons for his +dismissal were there given involving no accusation: there was little +desire in that quarter to have the matter searched into. There was +therefore nothing to the discredit of the boy, beyond his running to +earth in the neglected house like a wild animal. After three days he +was set at liberty. + +As the big policeman led the way to the door to send him out, Clare +addressed him thus: + +“Please, Mr. James, may I go back to the house for a little while?” + +“Well, you _are_ an innocent!” said James; “--or,” he added, “the +biggest little humbug ever I see!--No, it’s not likely!” + +“I only wanted,” explained Clare, “to set things straight a bit. The +house is cleaner than it was, _I_ know, but it is not in such good +order as when we went into it. I don’t like to leave it worse than we +found it.” + +“Never you heed,” said James, believing him perfectly before he knew +what he was about. “The house don’t belong to nobody, so far as ever I +heerd, an’ the things’ll rot all the same wherever they stand.” + +“But I should like,” persisted Clare. + +“I couldn’t do it off my own hook, an’ his worship would think you +only wanted to steal something. The best thing you can do is to leave +the place at once, an’ go where nobody knows nothing agin you.” + +Thought Clare with himself, “If the house doesn’t belong to anybody, +why wouldn’t they let me stay in it?” + +But the policeman opened the door, and as he was turning to say +good-bye to him, gave him a little shove, and closed it behind him. + + + + + Chapter XXXVIII. + + THE WORKHOUSE. + + +He went into the street with a white face and a dazed look--not from +any hardship he had experienced during his confinement, for he had +been in what to him was clover, but because he had lost the baby and +Abdiel, and because his mind had been all the time in perplexity with +regard to the proceedings of justice: he did not and could not see +that he had done anything wrong. Throughout his life it never mattered +much to Clare to be accused of anything wrong, but it did trouble him, +this time at least, to be punished for doing what was right. He took +it very quietly, however. + +Indignation may be a sign of innocence, but it is no necessary +consequence of innocence any more than it is a proof of righteousness. +A man will be fiercely indignant at an accusation that happens to be +false, who did the very thing last week, and is ready to do it again. +Indignation against wrong to another even, is no proof of a genuine +love of fair play. Clare hardly resented anything done to himself. His +inward unconscious purity held him up, and made him look events in the +face with an eye that was single and therefore at once forgiving and +fearless. The man who has no mote in his own eye cannot be knocked down +by the beam in his neighbour’s; while he who is busy with the mote in +his neighbour’s may stumble to destruction over the beam in his own. + +White and dazed as he came out, the moment he stepped across the +threshold, Clare met the comfort of God waiting for him. His eyes +blinded with the great light, for it was a glorious morning in the +beginning of June, he found himself assailed in unknightly fashion +below the knee: there, to his unspeakable delight, was Abdiel, +clinging to him with his fore-legs, and wagging his tail as if, like +the lizards for terror, he would shake it off for gladness! What a +blessed little pendulum was Abdiel’s tail! It went by that weight of +the clock of the universe called devotion. It was the escapement of +that delight which is of the essence of existence, and which, when God +has set right “our disordered clocks,” will be its very consciousness. + +Clare stood for a moment and looked about him. The needle of his +compass went round and round. It had no north. He could not go back to +the shop; he could not go back to the house; baby was in the workhouse, +but he could not stay there even if they would let him! Neither could +he stop in the town; the policeman said he must go away! Where was +he to go? There was not in the world one place for him better than +another! But they would let him see baby before he went!--and off he +set to find the workhouse. + +Abdiel followed quietly at his heel, for his master walked lost in +thought, and Abdiel was too hungry to make merry without his notice. +Clare, fresh to the world, had been a great reader for one so young, +and could encounter new experience with old knowledge. In his mind +stood a pile of fir-cones, and dried sticks, and old olive wood, which +the merest touch of experience would set in a blaze of practical +conclusion. But the workhouse was so near that his reflections before +he reached it amounted only to this--that there are worse places than a +prison when you have done nothing to deserve being put in it. A palace +may be one of them. You get enough to eat in a prison; in a palace you +do not; you get too much! + +The porter at the workhouse informed him it was not the day for seeing +the inmates; but the tall policeman had given Clare a hint, and he +requested to see the matron. After much demur and much entreaty, the +man went and told the matron. She, knowing the story of the baby, +wanted to see Clare, and was so much pleased with his manners and +looks, that his sad clothes pleaded for and not against him. She took +him at once to the room where the baby was with many more, telling him +he must prove she was his by picking her out. It was not wonderful that +Clare, who knew the faces of animals so well, should know his own baby +the moment he saw her, notwithstanding that she was decently clothed, +and had already improved in appearance. But the nurses declared they +had never before seen a man, not to say a boy, who could tell one baby +from another. + +“Why,” rejoined Clare, “my dog Abdiel could pick out the baby he was +nurse to!” + +“Ah, but he’s a dog!” + +“And I’m a boy!” said Clare. + +He descried her on the lap of an old woman, seeming to him very old, +who was at the head of the nursery-department. Old as she was, +however, she had a keen eye, and a handsome countenance, with a +quantity of white hair. Unlike the rest of the women, though not far +removed from them socially, she knew several languages, so far as to +read and enjoy books in them. Now and then a great woman may be found +in a workhouse, like a first folio of Shakspere on a bookstall, +among--oh, such companions! + +“Let me take her,” said Clare modestly, holding out his hands for the +baby. + +“Are you sure you will not let her drop?” + +“Why, ma’am,” answered Clare, “she’s my own baby! It was I took her +out of the water-butt! I washed and fed her every day!--not that I +could do it so well as you, ma’am!” + +She gave him the baby, and watched him with the eye of a seeress, for +she had a wonderful insight into character, and that is one of the +roots of prophecy. + +“You are a good and true lad,” she said at length, “and a hard success +lies before you. I don’t know what you will come to, but, with those +eyes, and that forehead, and those hands, if you come to anything but +good, you will be terribly to blame.” + +“I will try to be good, ma’am,” said Clare simply. “But I wish I knew +what they put me in prison for!” + +“What, indeed, my lamb!” she returned; and her eyes flashed with +indignation under the cornice of her white hair. “They’ll be put in +prison one day themselves that did it!” + +“Oh, I don’t mind!” said Clare. “I don’t want them to be punished. You +see I’m only waiting!” + +“What are you waiting for, sonny?” asked the old woman. + +“I don’t exactly know--though I know better than what I was put in +prison for. Nobody ever told me anything, but I’m always waiting for +something.” + +“The something will come, child. You will have what you want! Only go +on as you’re doing, and you’ll be a great man one day.” + +“I don’t want to be a great man,” answered Clare; “I’m only waiting +till what is coming does come.” + +The woman cast down her eyes, and seemed lost in thought. Clare +dandled the baby gently in his arms, and talked loving nonsense to +her. + +“Well,” said the old woman, raising at length her eyes, with a look of +reverence in them, to Clare’s, “I can’t help you, and you want no help +of mine. I’ve got no money, but--” + +“I’ve got plenty of money, ma’am,” interrupted Clare. “I’ve got a +whole shilling in my pocket!” + +“Bless the holy innocent!” murmured the woman. “--Well, I can only +promise you this--that as long as I live, the baby sha’n’t forget you; +and I ain’t so old as I look.” + +Here the matron came up, and said he had better be going now; but if +he came back any day after a month, he should see the baby again. + +“Thank you, ma’am,” replied Clare. “Keep her a good baby, please. I +will come for her one day.” + +“Please God I live to see that day!” said the old woman. “I think I +shall.” + +She did live to see it, though I cannot tell that part of the story +now. + + + + + Chapter XXXIX. + + AWAY. + + +So Clare went once more into the street, where Abdiel was again +watching for him, and stood on the pavement, not knowing which way to +turn. The big policeman had told him that no one there would give him +work after what had happened; and now, therefore, he was only waiting +for a direction to present itself. In a moment it occurred to him +that, having come in at one end of the town, he had better go out at +the other. He followed the suggestion, and Abdiel followed him--his +head hanging and his tail also, for the joy of recovering his master +had used up all the remnant of wag there was in his clock. He had no +more frolic or scamper in him now than when Clare first saw him. How +the poor thing had subsisted during the last few days, it were hard to +tell. It was much that he had escaped death from ill-usage. Meanest of +wretches are the boys or men that turn like grim death upon the +helpless. Except they change their way, helplessness will overtake +them like a thief, and they will look for some one to deliver them and +find none. Traitors to those whom it is their duty to protect, they +will one day find themselves in yet more pitiful plight than ever were +they. But I fear they will not believe it before their fate has them +by the throat. + +Clare saw that the dog was famished. He stopped at a butcher’s and +bought him a scrap of meat for a penny. Then he had elevenpence with +which to begin the world afresh, and was not hungry. + +Out on the highway they went, in a perfect English summer day, with +all the world before them. It was not an oyster for Clare to open with +sword, pen, or _sesame_; but he might find a place on the outside of +it for all that, and a way over it into a better--one that he _could_ +open and get at the heart of. The sun shone as on the day of the +earthquake--deep in Clare’s dimmest memorial cavern;--shone as if he +knew, come what might, that all was well; that if he shone his heart +out and went dark, nothing would go wrong; while, for the present, +everything depended on his shining his glorious best. + +“Come along, Abdiel,” said Clare; “we’re going to see what comes +next. At the worst, you know what hunger is, doggie, and that a good +deal of it can be borne pretty well--though I’m not fond of it any +more than you, doggie! We’ll not beg till we’re downright forced, and +we won’t steal. When that’s the next thing, we’ll just sit down, wag +our tails, and die.--There!” + +He gave him the last piece of his meat, and they trudged on for some +time without speaking. + +The sun was very hot, for it was past noon an hour or two, when they +came to a public-house, with a pump before it, and a trough. Clare +grew very thirsty when he saw the pump, and imagined the rush of a +thick sparkling curve from its spout. But its handle was locked with a +chain, to keep men and women from having water instead of beer. He +went with longing to the trough, but the water in it was so unclean +that, thirsty as he was, he could not look on it even as a last +resource. He walked into the house. + +[Illustration: CLARE AND ABDIEL AT THE LOCKED PUMP.] + +“Please, ma’am,” he said to the woman at the bar, “would you allow me +to pump myself a little water to drink?” + +“You think I’ve got nothing to do but serve tramps with water!” she +answered, throwing back her head till her nostrils were at right +angles with the horizon. + +“I’m not a tramp, ma’am,” said Clare. + +“Show me your money, then, for a pot of beer, like other honest folk.” + +“I’m afraid I told you wrong, ma’am,” returned Clare. “I’m afraid I +_am_ a tramp after all; only _I_’m looking for work, and most tramps +ain’t, I fancy.” + +“They all _say_ they are,” answered the woman. “That’s your story, and +that’s theirs!” + +“I’ve got elevenpence, ma’am; and could, I dare say, buy a pot of +beer, though I don’t know the price of one; but I don’t see where I’m +going to get any more money, and what we have must serve Abdiel and me +till we do.” + +“What right have _you_ to a dog, when you ain’t fit to pay your penny +for a half-pint o’ beer?” + +“Don’t be hard on the young ’un, mis’ess; he don’t look a bad sort!” +said a man who stood by with a pewter pot in his hand. + +Clare wondered why he had his cord-trousers pulled up a few inches and +tied under his knees with a string, which made little bags of them +there. He had to think for a mile after they left the public-house +before he discovered that it was to keep them from tightening on his +knees when he stooped, and so incommoding him at his work. + +“Thank you, sir,” he said. “I’m not a bad sort. I didn’t know it was +any harm to ask for water. It ain’t begging, is it, sir?” + +“Not as I knows on,” replied the man. “Here, take the lot!” + +He offered Clare his nearly emptied pewter. + +“No, thank you, sir,” answered Clare. “I am thirsty--but not so thirsty +as to take your drink from you. I can get on to the next pump. Perhaps +that won’t be chained up like a bull!” + +“Here, mis’ess!” cried the man. “This is a mate as knows a neighbour +when he sees him. I’ll stand him a half-pint. There’s yer money!” + +Without a word the woman flung the man’s penny in the till, and drew +Clare a half-pint of porter. Clare took it eagerly, turned to the man, +said, “I thank you, sir, and wish your good health,” and drained the +pewter mug. He had never before tasted beer, or indeed any drink +stronger than tea, and he did not like it. But he thanked his +benefactor again, and went back to the trough. + +“Dogs don’t drink beer,” he said to himself. “They know better!” and +lifting Abdiel he held him over the trough. Abdiel was not so +fastidious as his master, and lapped eagerly. Then they pursued their +uncertain way. + +Ready to do anything, he thought the shabbiness of his clothes would +be a greater bar to indoor than to outdoor work, and applied therefore +at every farm they came to. But he did not look so able as he was, and +boys were not much wanted. He never pitied himself, and never +entreated: to beg for work was beggary, and to beggary he would not +descend until driven by approaching death. But now and then some +tender-hearted woman, oftener one of ripe years, struck with his +look--its endurance, perhaps, or its weariness mingled with +hope--would perceive the necessity of the boy, and offer him the food +he did not ask--nor like him the less that, never doubting what came +to one was for both, he gave the first share of it to Abdiel. + + + + + Chapter XL. + + MALY. + + +Travelling on in vague hope, meeting with kindness enough to keep him +alive, but getting no employment, sleeping in what shelter he could +find, and never missing the shelter he could not find, for the weather +was exceptionally warm for the warm season, he came one day to a +village where the strangest and hardest experience he ever encountered +awaited him. What part of the country he was in, or what was the name +of the village, he did not know. He seldom asked a question, seldom +uttered word beyond a polite greeting, but kept trudging on and on, as +if the goal of his expectation were ever drawing nigher. He felt no +curiosity as to the names of the places he passed through. Why should +the names of towns and villages strung on a road to nowhere in +particular, interest him? He did, however, long afterward, come to +know the name of this village, and its topographical relations: the +place itself was branded on his brain. + +He entered it in the glow of a hot noon, and had walked nearly through +it without meeting any one, for it was the dinner-hour, and savoury +odours filled the air, when a little girl came from a neat house, and +ran farther down the street. He was very tired, very dusty, had eaten +nothing that day, had begun to despair of work, and was wishing +himself clear of the houses that he might throw himself down. But +something in the look of the child made him quicken his weary step as +he followed her. He overtook her, passed her, and saw her face. +Heavens! it was Maly, grown wonderfully bigger! He turned and caught +her up in his arms. She gave a screech of terror, and he set her down +in keenest dismay. Finding that he was not going to run away with her, +she did not run farther from him than to safe parleying distance. + +“You bad boy!” she cried; “you’re not to touch me! I will tell mamma!” + +“Why, Maly! don’t you know me?” + +“No, I don’t. You are a dirty boy!” + +“But, Maly!--” + +“My name is not Maly; it’s Mary; and I don’t know you.” + +“Have you forgotten Clare, Maly?--Clare that used to carry you about +all day long?” + +“Yes; I have forgotten you. You’re a dirty, ragged beggar-boy! You’re +a bad boy! Boys with holes in their clothes are bad boys.--Nursie told +me so, and she knows everything! She told me herself she knew +everything!” + +She gave another though milder scream: involuntarily, Clare had taken +a step toward her, with his hand in his pocket, searching, as in the +old days when she cried, for something to give her. But, alas, his +pockets were now as empty as his stomach! there was _nothing_ in +them--not even a crumb saved from a scanty meal! While he was yet +searching, the little child, his heart’s love--if indeed it was +she--stooped, gathered a handful of dust, and threw it at him. The big +boy burst into tears. The child mocked him for a minute, and when +Clare looked up again, drying his eyes with a rag, she was gone. + +He felt no resentment; love, old memories, his strange gentleness, and +pity for Maly and Maly’s mother, saved him from it. The child was big +and plump and rosy, but oh, how fallen from his little Maly! And, her +child grown such, the mother was poor indeed, though up in the dome of +the angels! If she did not know the change in her, it was the worse, +for she could not help! Clare, like most of my readers, had not yet +learned to trust God for everything. But he was true to Maly. Miserable +over her backsliding, he said to himself that evil counsellors were +more to blame than she. + +“Did she know me at all?” he pondered; “or has she forgot me +altogether?” + +He began to doubt whether the girl was really Maly, or one very like +her. About half an hour after, he met a poor woman with a bundle on +her bowed back, who gave him a piece of bread. When he had eaten that, +he began to doubt whether he had met any little girl. He remembered +that he had often come to himself, as he wandered along the road, to +find he had been lost in fancies of old scenes or imaginary new ones; +waked up, he did not at once realize himself a poor lad on the tramp +for work he could not find: his conceptions were for a time stronger +than the things around him. He was thereupon comforted with the hope +that he had not in reality seen Maly, but had imagined the whole +affair. How was it possible, though, that he should imagine such +horrible things of his little sister? On the other hand, was it not +more possible for a fainting brain to imagine such a misery, than for +the live child to behave in such a fashion? Every day for many days he +tormented himself with like reasonings; but by degrees the occurrence, +whether fancy or fact, receded, and he grew more conscious of +tramping, tramping along. He grew also more hopeless of getting work, +but not more doubtful that everything was right. For he knew of +nothing he had done to bring these things upon him. + +His quiet content never left him. At the worst pinch of hunger and +cold, he never fell into despair. I do not know what merit he had in +this, for he was constituted more hopeful and placid than I ever knew +another. What he had merit in was, that not for a hungry boy’s most +powerful temptation, something to eat, would he even imagine himself +doing what must not be done. He would not lead himself into temptation. +Thus he pleased the Power--let me rather say, ten times more truly--the +Father from whom he came. + + + + + Chapter XLI. + + THE CARAVANS. + + +Within a fortnight or so after the police had dismissed him, blowing +him loose on the world like a dandelion-seed in the wind, Clare had an +adventure which not only gave him pleasure, but led to work and food +and interest in life. + +Passing one day from a cross-country road into the highway, he came +straight on the flank of a travelling menagerie. It was one of some +size, and Clare saw at a glance that its horses were in fair +condition. The front part of the little procession had already gone +by, and an elephant was passing at the moment with a caravan--of +feline creatures, as Clare afterwards learned, behind him. He drew it +with absolute ease, but his head seemed to be dragged earthward by the +weight of his trunk, as he plodded wearily along. A world of delight +woke in the heart of the boy. He had read much about strange beasts, +but had never seen one. His impulse was to run straight to the +elephant, and tell him he loved him. For he was a live beast, and +Clare loved every creature, common or strange, wild or tame, ordinary +or wonderful. But prudent thought followed, and he saw it better to +hover around, in the hope of a chance of being useful. Oh, the +treasures of wonder and knowledge on the other side of those thin +walls of wood, so slowly drawn along the dusty highway! If but for a +moment he might gaze on their living marvels! He had no money, but +things came to him without money--not so plentifully as he could +sometimes wish--but they came, and so might this! Employment among +those animals would be well worth the long hungry waiting! This might +be the very work he had been looking for without knowing it! It was +for this, perhaps, he had been kept so long waiting--till the caravans +should come along the road, and he be at the corner as they passed! He +did not know how often a man may think thus and see it come to +nothing--because there is better yet beyond, for which more waiting is +wanted. + +At the end of the procession came a bear, shuffling along +uncomfortably. It went to Clare’s heart to see how far from +comfortable the poor beast appeared. “What a life it would be,” he +thought, “to have all the creatures in all those caravans to make +happy! That would be a life worth living!” + +It was a worthy ambition--infinitely higher than that of boys who want +to do something great, or clever, or strong. As to those who want to +be rich--for their ambition I have an utter contempt. How gladly would +I drive that meanness out of any boy’s heart! To fall in with the work +of the glad creator, and help him in it--that is the only ambition +worth having. It may not look a grand thing to do it in a caravan, but +it takes the mind of Christ to do it anywhere. + +Behind the bear, closing the procession, came a stoutish, +good-tempered-looking man, in a small spring-cart, drawn by a small +pony: he was the earthly owner of that caged life, with all its +gathered discomforts. Clare lifted his cap as he passed him--a +politeness of which the man took no notice, because the boy was +ragged. The moment he was past, Clare fell in behind as one of the +procession. He was prudent enough, however, not to go so near as to +look intrusive. + +When he had followed thus for a mile or two, he saw, by signs patent +to every wanderer, that they were coming near a town. Before reaching +it, however, they arrived at a spot where the hedges receded from the +road, leaving a little green sward on the sides of it, and there the +long line came to a halt. + +The menagerie had, the day before, been exhibited at a fair, and was +now on its way to another, to be held the next day in the town they +were approaching: they had made the halt in order to prepare their +entrance. To let a part of their treasure be seen, was the best way to +rouse desire after what was yet hidden: they were going, therefore, to +take out an animal or two more to walk in parade. Clare sat down at a +little distance, and wondered what was coming next. + +Experience of tramps had made the men suspicious, and it may be they +disliked having their proceedings watched by anybody; but, happily +for Clare, it was the master himself who came up to him, not without +something of menace in his bearing. The boy was never afraid, and hope +started up full grown as the man approached. He rose and took off his +cap--a very ready action with Clare, which sprung from pure politeness, +and from nothing either selfish or cringing. But the man put his own +interpretation on the civility. + +“What are you hanging about here for?” he said rudely. + +Now Clare had a perfect right to answer, had he so pleased, that he +was on the king’s highway, where no one had a right to interfere with +him. But he had the habit--he could not help it; it was natural to +him--of thinking first of the other party’s side of a question--a rare +gift, which served him better than he knew. For the other may be in the +right, and it is an ugly thing to interfere with any man’s right; while +a man’s own rights are never so much good to him as when he waives them. + +“I beg your pardon, sir,” he said; “I did not understand you wished to +be alone. I never thought you would mind me. Will it be far enough if +I go just out of sight, for I am very tired? It is pleasant, besides, +to know there are friends near!” + +The man recognized in Clare the modes and speech of a gentleman; and +having, in the course of his wandering life, seen and known a good +many strange things, he suspected under the rags a history. But he was +not interested enough to stop and inquire into it. + +“Never mind,” he said, in altered tone; “I see you’re after no +mischief!” and with that walked away, leaving Clare to do as he +pleased. + +A few minutes more went by. Clare sat hungry and sleepy on the grass +by the roadside. Before he knew, he was on his feet, startled by a +terrible noise. The lion had opened his great jaws, and his brown +leathery sides, working like a pair of bellows, had sent from his +throat a huge blast, half roar, half howl. When Clare came to himself +he knew, though he had never heard it before, that the fearful sound +was the voice of the lion. He did not know that all it meant was, that +his majesty had thought of his dinner. It was not indeed much more +than an audible gape. He stood for a moment, not at all terrified, but +half expecting to see a huge yellow animal burst out of one of the +caravans--he could not guess which: the roar was much too loud to +indicate one rather than another. He sat down again, but was not any +longer inclined to sleep. For a time, however, no second roar came +from the ribs of the captive monarch. + + + + + Chapter XLII. + + NIMROD. + + +That there had been a fair not far off will partly account for what +follows. As Clare sat resting, which was all he could do, with sleep +fled and food nowhere, a roar of a different kind invaded his ears. It +came along the road this time, not from the caravans. He looked, and +spied what would have brought the heart into the throat of many a +grown man. Away on the road, in the direction whence the menagerie had +come, he saw a cloud of dust and a confused struggle, presently +resolved into two men, each at the end of a rope, and an animal +between them attached to the ropes by a ring in his nose. It was a +bull, in terrible excitement, bounding this way and that, dragging and +driving the men--doing his best in fact to break away, now from the +one of them, now from the other, and now from both at once. It must +have tortured him to pull those strong men by the cartilage of his +nose, but he was in too great a rage to feel it much. Every other +moment his hoofs would be higher than his head, and again hoofs and +head and horns would be scraping the ground in a fruitless rush to +send one of his tormentors into space beyond the ken of bulls. With +swift divergence, like a scenting hound, he twisted and shot his huge +body. The question between men and bull seemed one of endurance. + +The pale-faced boy, though full of interest in the strife, yet having +had no food that day, was not in sufficient spirits to run and meet +the animal whirlwind, so as to watch closer its chances; but the +struggle came at length near enough for him to follow almost every +detail of it: he could see the bloody foam drip from the poor beast’s +nostrils. When about fifty yards away, the bull, by a sudden twist, +wrenched the rope from the hands of one of the men. He fell on his +back. The other dropped his rope and fled. The bull came scouring down +the highway. + +A second roar, as of muffled thunder, issued from the leathery flanks +of the lion. The bull made a sudden stop, scoring up the ground with +his hoofs. It seemed as if in full career he started back. Then down +went his head, and like a black flash, its accompanying thunder a +bellow of defiant contempt and wrath, he charged one of the caravans. +He had taken the hungry lion’s roar for a challenge to combat. It was +nothing to the bull that the voice was that of an unknown monster; he +was ready for whatever the monster might prove. + +The men busy about the caravans and wagons, caught sight of him +coming, and in the first moment of terror at a beast to which they +were not accustomed, bolted for refuge behind or upon them: they would +sooner have encountered their tiger broke loose. The same moment, with +astounding shock, the head of the bull went crack against the near +hind-wheel of the caravan in whose shafts stood the elephant, +patiently waiting orders. The bull had not caught sight of the +elephant, or he would doubtless have “gone for” him, not the +caravan. His ear, finer than Clare’s, must have distinguished whence +the roar proceeded: in that caravan, sure enough, was the lion, with +the rest of the great cats. He answered the blow of the bull’s head +with a roar thunderously different from his late sleepy leonine +sigh. It roused every creature in the menagerie. From the greatest to +the smallest each took up its cry. Out burst a tornado of terrific +sound, filling with horror the quiet noontide. The roaring and yelling +of lion, tiger, and leopard, the laughter of hyena, the howling of +jackal, and the snarling of bear, mingled in hideous dissonance with +the cries of monkeys and parrots; while certain strange gurgles made +Clare’s heart, lover of animals though he was, quiver, and his blood +creep. The same instant, however, he woke to the sense that he might +do something: he ran to the caravans. + +By this time the men, master and all, fully roused to the far worse +that might follow the attack of the bull, had caught up what weapons +were at hand, and rushed to repel the animal. For more than one or two +of them it might have proved a fatal encounter, but that the enraged +beast had entangled his horns in the spokes and rim of the wheel. In +terror of what might be approaching him from behind, he was struggling +wildly to extricate them. Peril upon peril! What if in the contortions +of his mighty muscles he pulled off the wheel, and the carriage toppled +over, every cage in it so twisted and wrenched that the bearings of +its iron bars gave way! The results were too terrible to ponder! This +way and that, and every way at once, he was writhing and pushing and +prising and dragging. The elephant turned the shafts slowly round to +see what was the matter behind. If the bull and the elephant yoked +to the caravan came to loggerheads, ruin was inevitable. The master +thought whether he had not better loose the elephant while the bull was +yet entangled by the horns. With one blow of his trunk he would break +the ruffian’s back and end the affray! It were good even, if one knew +how, to loose the wicked-looking horns: the brute’s struggles to free +them were more dangerous far than could be the horns themselves! + +While he hesitated, Clare came running up, with Abdiel at his heels +ready as any hornet to fly at bull or elephant, let his master only +speak the word. But the moment Clare saw how the bull’s horns were +mixed up with the spokes and fellies of the wheel, a glad suspicion +flashed across him: that was old Nimrod’s way! could it be Nimrod +himself? If it were, the trouble was as good as over! The suspicion +became a certainty the instant it woke. But never could Clare +altogether forgive himself for not at first sight recognizing his old +friend. I believe myself that hunger was to blame, and not Clare. + +The men stood about the animal, uncertain what to do, as he struggled +with his horns, and heaved and tore at the wheel to get them out of +it, the roars and howls and inarticulate curses going on all the +time. The elephant must have been tired, to stand so and do nothing! +For a moment Clare could not get near enough. He was afraid to call +him while the bull could not see him: Nimrod might but struggle the +more, in order to get to him! + +Up rushed a fellow, white with rage and running, bang into the middle +of the spectators, and shook the knot of them asunder. It was one of +the two men from whom Nimrod had broken. He had a pitchfork in his +hands which he proceeded to level. Clare flung his weight against him, +threw up his fork, shoved him aside, and got close to the maddened +animal. It was his past come again! How often had he not interfered to +protect Nimrod--and his would-be masters also! With instinctive, +unconscious authority, he held up his hand to the little crowd. + +“Leave him alone,” he cried. “I know him; I can manage him! Please do +not interfere. He is an old friend of mine.” + +They saw that the bull was already still: he had recognized the boy’s +voice! They kept his furious attendant back, and looked on in anxious +hope while Clare went up to the animal. + +“Nimrod!” he whispered, laying a hand on one of the creature’s horns, +and his cheek against his neck. + +Nimrod stood like a bull in bronze. + +“I’m going to get your horns out, Nimrod,” murmured Clare, and laid +hold of the other with a firm grasp. “You must let me do as I like, +you know, Nimrod!” + +His voice evidently soothed the bull. + +By the horns Clare turned his head now one way, now another, Nimrod +not once resisting push or pull. In a moment more he would have them +clear, for one of them was already free. Holding on to the latter, +Clare turned to the bystanders. + +“You mustn’t touch him,” he said, “or I won’t answer for him. And you +mustn’t let either of those men there”--for the second of Nimrod’s +attendants had by this time come up--“interfere with him or me. They +let him go because they couldn’t manage him. He can’t bear them; and +if he were to break loose from them again, it might be quite another +affair! Then he might distrust me!” + +The menagerie men turned, and looking saw that the man with the +pitchfork had revenge in his heart. They gave him to understand that +he must mind what he was about, or it would be the worse for him. The +man scowled and said nothing. + +Clare gently released the other horn, but kept his hold of the first, +moving the creature’s head by it, this way and that. A moment more and +he turned his face to the company, which had scattered a little. When +the inflamed eyes of Nimrod came into view, they scattered wider. +Clare still made the bull feel his hand on his horn, and kept speaking +to him gently and lovingly. Nimrod eyed his enemies, for such plainly +he counted them, as if he wished he were a lion that he might eat as +well as kill them. At the same time he seemed to regard them with +triumph, saying in his big heart, “Ha! ha! you did not know what a +friend I had! Here he is, come in the nick of time! I thought he +would!” Clare proceeded to untie the ropes from the ring in his +nose. The man with the pitchfork interfered. + +[Illustration: CLARE PROCEEDS TO UNTIE THE ROPES FROM THE RING IN THE +BULL’S NOSE.] + +“That wonnot do!” he said, and laid his hand on Clare’s arm. “Would +you send him ramping over the country, and never a hold to have on +him?” + +“It wasn’t much good when you had a hold on him--was it now?” returned +the boy. “Where do you want to take him?” + +“That’s my business,” answered the man sulkily. + +“I fancy you’ll find it’s mine!” returned Clare. “But there he is! +Take him.” + +The man hesitated. + +“Then leave me to manage him,” said Clare. + +A murmur of approbation arose. The caravan people felt he knew what he +was saying. They believed he had power with the bull. + +While yet he was untying the first of the ropes from the animal’s +bleeding nostrils, Clare’s fingers all at once refused further +obedience, his eyes grew dim, and he fell senseless at the bull’s +feet. + +“Don’t tell Nimrod!” he murmured as he fell. + +“Oh, that explains it!” cried the man with the pitchfork to his mate. +“He knows the cursed brute!” For Clare had hitherto spoken his name to +the bull as if it were a secret between them. + +Neither had the sense to perceive that the explanation lay in the +bull’s knowing Clare, not in Clare’s knowing the bull. They made haste +to lay hold of the ropes. Nimrod stood motionless, looking down on his +friend, now and then snuffing at the pale face, which the thorough-bred +mongrel, Abdiel, kept licking continuously. Noses of bull and dog met +without offence on the loved human countenance. But had the men let the +bull feel the ropes, that moment he would have been raging like a demon. + +The men of the caravan, admiring both Clare’s influence over the animal +and his management of him, grateful also for what he had done for them, +hastened to his help. When they had got him to take a little brandy, he +sat up with a wan smile, but presently fell sideways on his elbow, and +so to the ground again. + +“It’s nothing,” he murmured; “it’s only I’m rather hungry.” + +“Poor boy!” said a woman, who had followed her brandy from the +house-caravan, afraid it might disappear in occult directions, “when +did you have your last feed?” + +She stood looking down on the white face, almost between the fore-feet +of the bull. + +“I had a piece of bread yesterday afternoon, ma’am,” faltered Clare, +trying to look up at her. + +“Bless my soul!” she cried, “who’s been a murderin’ of you, child?” + +She thought he was in company with the two men; and they had been +ill-treating him. + +“I can’t get any work, ma’am, so I don’t want much to eat. Now I think +of it, I believe it was the gladness of seeing an old friend again, +and not the hunger, that made me feel so queer all at once.” + +“Where’s your friend?” she asked, looking round the assembly. + +“There he is!” answered Clare, putting up his hand, and stroking the +big nose that was right over his face. + +“Couldn’t you rise now?” said the woman, after a moment’s silent +regard of him. + +“I’ll try, ma’am; I don’t feel quite sure.” + +“I want you to come into the house, and have a good square meal.” + +“If you would be so kind, ma’am, as let me have a bit of bread here! +Nimrod would not like me to leave him. He loves me, ma’am, and if I +went away, he might be troublesome. Those men will never do anything +with him: he doesn’t like them! They’ve been rough to him, I don’t +doubt. Not that I wonder at that, for he is a terrible beast to most +people. They used to say he never was good with anybody but me. I +suppose he knew I cared for him!” + +His eyes closed again. The woman made haste to get him something. In a +few minutes she returned with a basin of broth. He took it eagerly, +but with a look of gratitude that went to her heart. Before he tasted +it, however, he set it on the ground, broke in half the great piece of +bread she had brought with it, and gave the larger part to his +dog. Then he ate the other with his broth, and felt better than for +many a day. Some of the men said he could not be very hungry to give a +cur like that so much of his dinner; but the evil thought did not +enter the mind of the woman. + +“You’d better be taking your beast away,” said the woman, who by this +time understood the affair, to the two men. + +They were silent, evidently disinclined for such another tussle. + +“You’d better be going,” she said again. “If anything should happen +with that animal of yours, and one of ours was to get loose, the devil +would be to pay, and who’d do it?” + +“They’d better wait for me, ma’am,” said Clare, rising. “I’m just +ready!--They won’t tell me where they want to take him, but it’s all +one, so long as I’m with him. He’s my friend!--Ain’t you, Nimrod? +We’ll go together--won’t we, Nimrod?” + +While he spoke, he undid the ropes from the ring in the bull’s +nose. Gathering them up, he handed them politely to one of the men, +and the next moment sprang upon the bull’s back, just behind his +shoulders, and leaning forward, stroked his horns and neck. + +“Give me up the dog, please,” he said. + +The owner of the menagerie himself did as Clare requested. All stood +and stared, half expecting to see him flung from the creature’s back, +and trampled under his hoofs. Even Nimrod, however, would not easily +have unseated Clare, who could ride anything he had ever tried, and +had tried everything strong enough to carry him, from a pig +upward. But Nimrod was far from wishing to unseat his friend, who with +hands and legs began to send him toward the road. + +“Are you going that way?” he asked, pointing. The men answered him +with a nod, sulky still. + +“Don’t go with those men,” said the woman, coming up to the side of +the bull, and speaking in a low voice. “I don’t like the look of +them.” + +“Nimrod will be on my side, ma’am,” answered Clare. “They would never +have got him home without me. They don’t understand their +fellow-creatures.” + +“I’m afraid you understand your fellow-creatures, as you call them, +better than you do your own kind!” + +“I think they are my own kind, ma’am. That is how they know me, and do +what I want them to do.” + +“Stay with us,” said the woman coaxingly, still speaking low. “You’ll +have plenty of your fellow-creatures about you then!” + +“Thank you, ma’am, a thousand times!” answered Clare, his face +beaming; “but I couldn’t leave poor Nimrod to do those men a mischief, +and be killed for it!” + +“You’d have plenty to eat and drink, and som’at for your pocket!” +persisted the woman. + +“I know I should have everything I wanted!” answered Clare, “and I’m +very thankful to you, ma’am. But you see there’s always something, +somehow, that’s got to be done before the other thing!” + +Here the master came up. He had himself been thinking the boy would be +a great acquisition, and guessed what his wife was about; but he was +afraid she might promise too much for services that ought to be had +cheap. Few scruple to take advantage of the misfortune of another to +get his service cheap. It is the economy of hell. + +“I sha’n’t feel safe till that bull of yours is a mile off!” he said. + +“Come along, Nimrod!” answered Clare, always ready with the responsive +deed. + +Away went Nimrod, gentle as a lamb. + + + + + Chapter XLIII. + + ACROSS COUNTRY. + + +The two men came after at their ease. No sooner was Nimrod on the +road, however, than he began to quicken his pace. He quickened it +fast, and within a minute or so was trotting swiftly along. The men +ran panting and shouting behind. The more they shouted, the faster +Nimrod went. Ere long he was out of their sight, though Clare could +hear them cursing and calling for a time. + +He had endeavoured to stop Nimrod, but the bull seemed to have made up +his mind that he had obeyed enough for one day. He did not heed a word +Clare said to him, but kept on and on at a swinging trot. Clare would +have jumped off had he been sure the proceeding would stop him; but, +now that he would not obey him, he feared lest, in doing so, he might +let him loose on the country, when there was no saying what mischief +he might not work. On the other hand, he felt sure that he could +restrain him from violence, though he might not prevent his +frolicking. He must therefore keep his seat. + +For a few miles Nimrod was content with the highway, now trotting +beautifully, now breaking into a canter. But all at once he turned at +right angles in the middle of the road, cleared the skirting fence +like a hunter, and took a bee-line across the fields. Compelled +sometimes to abandon it, he showed great judgment in choosing the +place at which to get out of the enclosure, or cross the natural +obstruction. On and on he went, over hedge after hedge, through field +after field, until Clare began to wonder where all the people in the +world had got to. Then a strange feeling gradually came over +him. Surely at some time or other he had seen the meadow he was +crossing! Was he asleep, and dreaming the jolly ride he was having on +Nimrod’s back? What a strong creature Nimrod was! Would he never be +tired? How oddly he felt! Were his senses going from him? It was like +the strangest mixture of a bad dream and a good! + +There seemed at length no further room for doubt or mistake. Everything +was in its place! It was plain why Nimrod was so obstinate! The dear +old fellow was carrying him back to where they had been together so +many happy days! They were nigh Mr. Goodenough’s farm, and making +straight for it! How strange it was! he had felt himself a measureless +distance from it! But in his wandering he had taken many turns he did +not heed, and Nimrod had come the shortest way. Delight filled his +heart at the thought of seeing once more the places where his father +and mother seemed yet to live. But instantly came the thought of Maly, +and drowned the other thought in bitterness. Then he felt how worthless +place is, when those who made it dear are gone. Father and mother are +home--not the house we were born in! + +They were soon upon the farm where once he had abundance of labour, +abundance to eat, and abundance of lowly friendship. Nimrod was making +for his old stable. He was weary now, and breathing heavily, though +not at all spent. Was he dreaming of a golden age, in which Clare +should be ever at his beck and call? + +Clare had little inclination to encounter any of the people of the +farm. He would indeed have been glad, from a little way off, to get a +sight of his once friend and master, the farmer himself; and very +gladly would he have gone into the stable in the hope of a greeting +from old Jonathan; but he would not willingly meet “the mistress!” +Nimrod should take him to his old stall; there he would tie him up, +and flee from the place! The evening was now come, and in the dusk he +would escape unseen. + +When they reached Nimrod’s door, they found it closed; and Clare, +stiff enough by this time, slipped off to open it. Nimrod began to paw +the stones, and blow angry puffs from his wounded nose. When Clare got +the door open, he saw, to his confusion, a vague dark bulk, another +bull, in Nimrod’s stall! The roar that simultaneously burst from each +was ferocious, and down went Nimrod’s head to charge. It was a +terrible moment for Clare: the new bull was fast by the head, and, +unable to turn it to his adversary, would be gored to death almost in +a moment! He could not let Nimrod be guilty of such unfairness! And +the mistress would think he had brought him back for the very purpose! +He all but jumped on the horns of his friend, making him yield just +ground enough for the shutting of the door. He knew well, however, +that not three such doors in one would keep Nimrod from an enemy. With +his back to it he stood facing him and talking to him, and all the +while they heard the bull inside struggling to get free. He stood +between two horned rages, only a chain and a plank betwixt him and the +one at his back, with which he had no influence. A coward would have +escaped, and left the two bullies to settle between them which had the +better right to the stall--not without blood, almost as certainly not +without loss of life, perhaps human as well as bovine. But Clare was +made of other stuff. + +Before he could get Nimrod away, the bellowing brought out the +farmer. All his men had gone to the village; only himself and his wife +were at home. + +“What’s got the brute?” he cried on the threshold, but instantly began +to run, for he saw through the gathering darkness a darker shape he +knew, roaring and pawing at the door of his old quarters, and a boy +standing between him and it, with marvellous courage in mortal danger. +He understood at once that Nimrod had broken loose and come back. But +when he came near enough to recognize Clare, astonishment, and +something more sacred than astonishment, held him dumb. Ever since the +unjust blow that sent the boy from him, his heart had been aware of a +little hollow of remorse in it. Now all his former relations with him +while his adoptive father yet lived, came back upon him. He remembered +him dressed like the little gentleman he always was--and there he +stood, the same gentle fearless creature, in absolute rags! If his +wife saw him! The farmer had no fear of Nimrod in his worst rages, but +he feared his wife in her gentlest moods. Happily for both, a critical +moment in the cooking of the supper had arrived. + +“Clare!” he stammered. + +“Yes, sir,” returned Clare, and laid hold of Nimrod’s horn. The animal +yielded, and turned away with him. The farmer came nearer, and put his +arm round the boy’s neck. The boy rubbed his cheek against the arm. + +“I’m sorry I struck you, Clare!” faltered the big man. + +“Oh, never mind, sir! That was long ago!” answered the boy. + +“Tell me how you’ve been getting on.” + +“Pretty well, sir! But I want to tell you first how it is I’m here +with Nimrod. Only it would be better to put him somewhere before I +begin.” + +“It would,” agreed the farmer; and between them, with the enticements +of a pail of water and some fresh-cut grass, they got him into a shed, +where they hoped he would forget the proximity of the usurper, and, +with the soothing help of his supper, go to sleep. + +Then Clare told his story. Mr. Goodenough afterward asseverated that, +if he had not known him for a boy that would not lie, he would not +have believed the half of it. + +“Come, Abdiel!” said Clare, the moment he ended--and would have +started at once. + +“Won’t you have something after your long ride?” said the farmer. + +Clare looked down at his clothes, and laughed. The farmer knew what he +meant, and did not ask him into the house. + +“When had you anything to eat?” he inquired. + +“I shall do very well till to-morrow,” answered Clare. + +“Then if you will go, I’m glad of the opportunity of paying you the +wages I owed you,” said the farmer, putting his hand in his pocket. + +“You gave me my food! That was all I was worth!” protested Clare. + +“You were worth more than that! I knew the difference when I had +another boy in your place! I wish I had you again!--But it wouldn’t +do, you know! it wouldn’t do!” he added hastily. + +With that he succeeded in pulling a sovereign from the depth of a +trowser-pocket, and held it out to Clare. It was neither large wages +nor a greatly generous gift, but it seemed to the boy wealth +enormous. He could not help holding out his hand, but he was ashamed +to open it. What the giver regarded as a debt, the receiver regarded +as a gift. He stood with his hand out but clenched. There was a combat +inside him. + +“It’s too much!” he protested, looking at the sovereign almost with +fear. “I never had so much money in my life!” + +“You earned it well,” said the farmer magnanimously. + +The moral cramp forsook his hand. He took the money with a hearty +“Thank you, sir.” As he put it in his pocket, he felt its corners +carefully, lest there should be a hole. But his pockets had not had +half the wear of the clothes they inhabited. + +“Where are you going?” asked the farmer. + +Clare mentioned the small town in whose neighbourhood he had left the +caravans, and said he thought the people of the menagerie would like +him to help them with the beasts. The farmer shook his head. + +“It’s not a respectable occupation!” he remarked. + +Clare did not understand him. + +“Do they cheat?” he asked. + +“No; I don’t suppose they cheat worse than anybody else. But it ain’t +respectable.” + +Had he known a little more, Clare might have asserted that the men +about the menagerie were at least as respectable as almost any farmer +with a horse to sell. But he knew next to nothing of wickedness, +whence many a man whose skull he had brains enough to fill three +times, regarded him as a simpleton. + +Clare thought everything honest honourable. When people said +otherwise, he did not understand, and continued to act according as he +understood. A thousand dishonourable things are done, and largely +approved, which Clare would not have touched with one of his fingers: +he could see nothing more dishonourable in having to do with wild +beasts than in having to do with tame ones. If any boy wants to know +the sort of thing I count in that thousand, I answer him--“The next +thing you are asked to do, or are inclined to do--if you have any +doubt about it, DON’T DO IT.” That is the way to know the honourable +thing from the dishonourable. + +Clare made no attempt to argue the question with the farmer. He +inquired of him the nearest way to the town, and went--the quicker +that he heard the voice of Mrs. Goodenough, calling her husband to +supper. + + + + + Chapter XLIV. + + A THIRD MOTHER. + + +Who ever had a sovereign for the first time in his life, and did not +feel rich? Clare trudged along merrily, and Abdiel shared his +joy. They had to sleep out of doors nevertheless; for by this time +Clare knew that a boy, especially a boy in rags, must mind whom he +asks to change a sovereign. In the lee of a hay-mow, on a little loose +hay, they slept, Abdiel in Clare’s bosom, and slept well. + +There was not much temptation to lie long after waking, and the +companions were early on their way. It was yet morning when they came +to the public house where Clare had his first and last half-pint of +beer. The landlady stood at the newly opened door, with her fists in +her sides, looking out on the fresh world, lost in some such thought +as was possible to her. Clare pulled off his cap, and bade her good +morning as he passed. Perhaps she knew she did not deserve politeness; +anyhow she took Clare’s for impudence, and came swooping upon him. He +stopped and waited her approach, perplexed as to the cause of it; and +was so unprepared for the box on the ear she dealt him, that it almost +threw him down. Her ankle was instantly in Abdiel’s sharp teeth. She +gave a frightful screech, and Clare, coming to himself, though still +stupid from her blow and his own surprise, called off the dog. The +woman limped raging to the house, and Clare thought it prudent to go +his way. He talked severely to Abdiel as they went; but though the dog +could understand much, I doubt if he understood that lecture. For +Abdiel was one of the few, even among dogs, with whom the defence of +master or friend is an inborn, instinctive duty; and strong temptation +even has but a poor chance against the sense of duty in a dog. + +It was night when they entered the town. They were already a weary +pair when the far sounds of the brass band of the menagerie, mostly +made up of attendants on the animals, first entered their ears. The +marketing was over; the band was issuing its last invitation to the +merry-makers to walk up and see strange sights; its notes were just +dying to their close, when the wayfarers arrived at the foot of the +steps leading to the platform where the musicians stood. Clare +ascended, and Abdiel crept after him. + +At a table in a small curtained recess on the platform, sat the +mistress to receive the money of those that entered. Clare laid his +sovereign before her. She took it up without looking at him, but at it +she looked doubtfully. She threw it on her table. It would not ring. +She bit it with her white teeth, and looked at it again; then at +length gave a glance at the person who offered it. Her dull lamp +flickered in the puffs of the night-wind, and she did not recognize +Clare. She saw but a white-faced, ragged boy, and threw him back his +sovereign. + +“Won’t pass,” she said with decision, not unmingled with contempt. She +sat at the receipt of money, where too many men and women cease to be +ladies and gentlemen. + +Clare did not at first understand. He stood motionless and, for the +second time that day, bewildered. How could money be no money? + +“Ain’t you got sixpence?” she asked. + +“No, ma’am,” answered Clare. “I haven’t had sixpence for many a day.” + +The moment he spoke, the woman looked him sharply in the face, and +knew him. + +“Drat my stupid eyes!” she said fervently. “That I shouldn’t ha’ known +you! Walk in, walk in. Go where you please, and do as you +please. You’re right welcome.--Where did you get that sov.?” + +“From Farmer Goodenough.” + +“Good enough, I hope, not to take advantage of an innocent prince! Was +it for taking home the bull?” + +“No, ma’am. I didn’t take the bull home. The bull took me to the old +home where we used to be together. He didn’t want a new one!” + +“Well, never mind now. Give me the sovereign. I’ll talk to you by and +by. Go in, or the show ’ill be over. Look after your dog, though. We +don’t like dogs. He mustn’t go in.” + +“I’ll send him right outside, if you wish it, ma’am.” + +“I do.--But will he stay out?” + +“He will, ma’am.” + +Clare took up Abdiel, and setting him at the top of the steps, told +him to go down and wait. Abdiel went hopping down, like a dirty little +white cataract out on its own hook, turned in under the steps, and +deposited himself there until his master should call him. + + + + + Chapter XLV. + + THE MENAGERIE. + + +A strange smell was in Clare’s nostrils, and as he went down the steps +inside, it grew stronger. He did not dislike it; but it set him +thinking why it should so differ from that of domestic animals. He was +presently in the midst of a vision attractive to all boys, but which +few had ever looked upon with such intelligent wonder as he; for Clare +had read and re-read every book about animals upon which he could lay +his hands. He had a great power too of remembering what he read; for +he never let a description glide away over the outside of his eyes, +but always put it inside his thinking place. What with pictures and +descriptions, he seemed to know, as he looked around him, every animal +on which his eyes fell. + +The area was by no means crowded. There had been many visitors during +the day, but now it was late. He could see into all the cages that +formed the sides of the enclosure. Many of the creatures seemed +restless, few sleepy: night was the waking time for most of them. How +should a great roaming, hunting cat go to sleep in a little cube of +darkness! “Oh,” thought Clare, “how gladly would I help them to bear +it! I could bear it myself with somebody near to be kind to me!” + +He had begun to feel that the quiet happiness to which he was once so +accustomed that he did not think much about it, was his because it was +_given_ him. He had begun to see that it did not come to him of +itself, but from the love of his father and mother. He had yet to +learn that it was given to them to give to him by the Father of +fathers and mothers. But he was beginning to prize every least +kindness shown him. This re-acted on his desire to make the happiness +greater and the pain less everywhere about him. He had little chance +of doing much for people, he thought; but he knew how to do things for +some animals, and perhaps it was only necessary to know others to be +able to do something for them too! + +Thoughts like these passing through his mind, and his gaze wandering +hither and thither over the shifting shapes, his eyes rested on the +tenant of one of the cages, and his heart immediately grew very sore, +for he seemed unable to lift his head. He was a big animal, alone in +his prison, of a blackish colour, and awkward appearance. He went +nearer, and found he had a big ring in his nose like Nimrod. But to +the ring was fastened a strong chain, and the chain was bolted down to +the floor of the cage, which was of iron covered with boards, in their +turn covered with a thick sheet of lead. The chain was so short that +it held the poor creature’s head within about a foot of the floor. He +could not lift it higher, or move it farther on either side; but he +kept moving it constantly. It was a pitiful sight, and Clare went +nearer still, drawn far more by compassion, and indeed sympathy, than +by curiosity. He was a terrible brute, a big grizzly bear, ugly to +repulsiveness. The snarling scorn, the sneering, lip-writhing hate of +the demoniacal grin with which he received the boy, was hideous; the +rattling, pebble-jarring growl that came from his devilish throat was +loathing embodied. What if spirits worse than their own get into some +of the creatures by virtue of the likeness between them! One day will +be written, perhaps, a history of animals very different from any +attempted by mere master in zoology. Clare spoke to the beast again +and again, but was unvaryingly answered by the same odious snarl, +curling his lip under his nose-ring. It seemed to express the imagined +delight of tearing him limb from limb. + +“Poor fellow!” said Clare, “how can he be good-tempered with that +torturing ring and chain! His unalterable position must make his every +bone ache!” + +But had his nose been set free, such a raging-bear-struggle to get at +the nearest of his fellow-prisoners would have ensued, as must soon +have torn to shreds the partition between them. For he was a +beast-bedlamite, an animal volcano, a furnace of death, an incarnate +paroxysm of wrath. The inspiration of the creature, so far as one +could see, was pure hate. + +The boy turned aside with quivering heart--sore for the grizzly’s +nose, and sorer still for the grizzly himself that he was so +unfriendly. + +Right opposite, a creature of a far differing disposition seemed +casting defiance to all the ills of life. As he turned with a sad +despair from the grizzly, Clare caught sight of his pranks, and +hastened across the area. The creature kept bounding from side to side +of his cage, agile and frolicsome as a kitten. But the light was poor, +and Clare could not even conjecture to which of the cat-kinds he +belonged. When he came near his cage, he saw that he was yellowish +like a lion, and thought perhaps he might be a young lion. He had no +mane. Clare judged him four feet in length without the tail--or +perhaps four and a half. A little way off was the real lion--a young +one, it is true, but quite grown, with a thin ruffy mane, and lordly +carriage and gaze. It was he whose roar had challenged Nimrod, giving +the topmost flutter to the flame of his wrath. But Clare was so taken +with the frolicsome creature before him, that he gave but a glance at +the grand one as he walked up and down his prison, and turned again to +the merry one disporting himself alone, who seemed to find the +pleasure of life in great games with companions no one saw but +himself. For minutes he stood regarding the gladness of God’s +creature. A wild thing of the woods and plains, he made the most of +the bars and floor and roof of his cage. No one careless of liberty +could make such bounds as those; yet he was joyous in closest +imprisonment! His liberty gone, his freedom contracted to a few cubic +feet, his space diminished almost to the mould of his body, the great +wild philosopher created his own liberty, made it out of his own love +of it. Like a live, erratic shuttle he went to and fro, unweaving, +unravelling, unwinding, drawing out the knot of confinement, flinging +out, radiating and spreading and breathing out space in all +directions, by multitudinous motion of disentanglement! Space gone +from him, space in the abstract should replace it! He would not be +slave to condition! Space unconditioned should be his! For him liberty +should not lie in space, but in his own soul. Room should be but the +poor out-side symbol of his inward freedom! He would spin out, he +would weave, he would unroll essential liberty into spiritual space! +His mind to him a kingdom was. Not a grumble, not a snarl! He left +discontent to men, to build their own prisons withal. A proud man with +everything he longs for, if such a man there be, is but a slave; this +creature of the glad creator was and would be free, because he was a +free soul. Prison bars could not touch that by whose virtue he was and +would be free! + +The germ of this thinking was in the mind of Clare while he stood and +gazed; and as he told me the story, its ripeness came thus, or nearly +thus, from his lips; for he had thought much in lonely places. + +As he gazed and sympathized, there awoke within him that strange +consciousness which my reader must, at one time or another, have +known--of being on the point of remembering something. It was not a +memory that came, but a memory of a memory--the shadow of a memory +gone, but trying to come out from behind a veil--a sense of having +once known something. It gave another aspect to the blessed creature +before him. The creature and himself seemed for a moment to belong +together to another time. Could he have seen such an animal before? He +did not think so! He could never have visited a menagerie and +forgotten it! If he had known such a creature, his after-reading would +have recalled it, he would know it now! He could tell the lion and the +tiger and the leopard, although he seemed to know he had never seen +one of them; he could not tell this animal, and yet--and yet!--what +was it? The feeling itself lasted scarce an instant, and went no +farther. No memory came to him. The foiled expectation was all he +had. The very reasoning about it helped to obliterate the shape of the +feeling itself. He could not even recall how the thing had felt; he +could only remember it had been there. It was now but the shadow of +the shadow of a dream--a yet vaguer memory than that thinnest of +presences which had at the first tantalized him. We remember what we +cannot recall. + +Perhaps the rousing of the odd, fantastic feeling had been favoured by +the slumber beginning to encroach on body and brain. While he stood +looking at the one creature, all the wonderful creatures began to get +mixed up together, and he thought it better to go and search for some +field of sleep, where he might mow a little for his use. He said +good-night to the great, gentle, jubilant cat, turned from him +unwillingly, and went up the steps. Almost every spectator was +gone. At the top of them he turned for a last look, but could +distinguish nothing except the dim form of the young lion, as he +thought him, still gamboling in the presence of his maker. + +He thought to see the mistress of the menagerie, but she was no longer +in her curtained box. He went out on the deserted platform, and down +the steps. Abdiel was already at the foot when he reached it, wagging +his weary little tail. + +They set out to look for a shelter. Their search, however, was so much +in vain, that at last they returned and lay down under one of the +wagons, on the hard ground of the public square. Sleeping so often out +of doors, he had never yet taken cold. + + + + + Chapter XLVI. + + THE ANGEL OF THE WILD BEASTS. + + +When Clare looked up he saw nothing between him and the sky. They had +dragged the caravan from above him, and he had not moved. Abdiel +indeed waked at the first pull, but had lain as still as a +mouse--ready to rouse his master, but not an instant before it should +be necessary. + +Clare saw the sky, but he saw something else over him, better than the +sky--the face of Mrs. Halliwell, the mistress of the menagerie. In it, +as she stood looking down on him, was compassion, mingled with +self-reproach. + +Clare jumped up, saying, “Good morning, ma’am!” He was yet but half +awake, and staggered with sleep. + +“My poor boy!” answered the woman, “I sent you to sleep on the cold +earth, with a sovereign of your own in my pocket! I made sure you +would come and ask me for it! You’re too innocent to go about the +world without a mother!” + +She turned her face away. + +“But, ma’am, you know I couldn’t have offered it to anybody,” said +Clare. “It wasn’t good!--Besides, before I knew that,” he went on, +finding she did not reply, “there was nobody but you I dared offer it +to: they would have said I stole it--because I’m so shabby!” he added, +looking down at his rags. “But it ain’t in the clothes, ma’am--is it?” + +Getting the better of her feelings for a moment, she turned her face +and said,-- + +“It was all my fault! The sov. is a good one. It’s only cracked! I +ought to have known, and changed it for you. Then all would have been +well!” + +“I don’t think it would have made any difference, ma’am. We would +rather sleep on the ground than in a bed that mightn’t be +clean--wouldn’t we, Abby?” The dog gave a short little bark, as he +always did when his master addressed him by his name.--“But I’m so +glad!” Clare went on. “I was sure Mr. Goodenough thought the sovereign +all right when he gave it me!--Were you ever disappointed in a +sovereign, ma’am?” + +“I been oftener disappointed in them as owed ’em!” she answered. “But +to think o’ me snug in bed, an’ you sleepin’ out i’ the dark night! I +can’t abide the thought on it!” + +“Don’t let it trouble you, ma’am; we’re used to it. Ain’t we, Abby?” + +“Then you oughtn’t to be! and, please God, you shall be no more! But +come along and have your breakfast. We don’t start till the last.” + +“Please, ma’am, may Abdiel come too?” + +“In course! ‘Love me, love my dog!’ Ain’t that right?” + +“Yes, ma’am; but some people like dogs worse than boys.” + +“A good deal depends on the dog. When folk brings up their dogs as bad +as they do their childern, I want neither about me. But your dog’s a +well-behaved dog. Still, he must learn not to come in sight o’ the +animals.” + +“He will learn, ma’am!--Abdiel, lie down, and don’t come till I call +you.” + +At the word, the dog dropped, and lay. + +The house-caravan stood a little way off, drawn aside when they began +to break up. They ascended its steps behind, and entered an enchanting +little room. It had muslin curtains to the windows, and a small stove +in which you could see the bright red coals. On the stove stood a +coffee-pot and a covered dish. How nice and warm the place felt, after +the nearly shelterless night! + +The breakfast-things were still on the table. Mr. Halliwell had had +his breakfast, but Mrs. Halliwell would not eat until she had found +the boy. She had been unhappy about him all the night. Her husband had +assured her the sovereign was a good one, and the boy had told her he +had no money but the sovereign! She little knew how seldom he fared +better than that same night! When he got among hay or straw, that was +luxury. + +They sat down to breakfast, and the good woman was very soon confirmed +in the notion that the boy was a gentleman. + +“Call your dog now,” she said, “an’ let’s see if he’ll come!” + +“May I whistle, ma’am?” + +“Why not!--But will he hear you?” + +“He has very sharp ears, ma’am.” + +Clare gave a low, peculiar whistle. In a second or two, they heard an +anxious little whine at the door. Clare made haste to open it. There +stood Abdiel, with the words in his eyes, as plain almost as if he +spoke them--“Did you call, sir?” The woman caught him and held him to +her bosom. + +“You blessed little thing!” she said. + +And surely if there be a blessing to be had, it is for them that obey. + +Clare heard and felt the horses put-to, but the hostess of this +Scythian house did not rise, and he too went on with his +breakfast. When they were in motion, it was not so easy to eat nicely, +but he managed very well. By the time he had done, they had left the +town behind them. He wanted to help Mrs. Halliwell with the +breakfast-things, but whether she feared he would break some of them, +or did not think it masculine work, she would not allow him. + +Nothing had been said about his going with them; she had taken that +for granted. Clare began to think perhaps he ought to take his leave: +there was nothing for him to do! He and Abdiel ought at least to get +out and walk, instead of burdening the poor horses with their weight, +when they were so well rested, and had had such a good breakfast! But +when he said so to Mrs. Halliwell, she told him she must have a little +talk with him first, and formally proposed that he should enter their +service, and do whatever he was fit for in the menagerie. + +“You’re not frightened of the beasts, are you?” she said. + +“Oh no, ma’am; I love them!” answered Clare. “But are you sure +Mr. Halliwell thinks I could be of use?” + +“Don’t you think yourself you could?” asked Mrs. Halliwell. + +“I know I could, ma’am; but I should not like him to take me just +because he was sorry for me!” + +“You innocent! People are in no such hurry to help their +neighbours. My husband’s as good a man as any going; but it don’t mean +he would take a boy because nobody else would have him. A fool of a +woman might--I won’t say; but not a man I ever knew. No, no! He saw +the way you managed that bull!--a far more unreasonable creature than +any we have to do with!” + +“Ah! you don’t know Nimrod, ma’am!” + +“I don’t, an’ I don’t want to!--Such wild animals ought to be put in +caravans!” she added, with a laugh. + +“Well, ma’am,” said Clare, “if you and Mr. Halliwell are of one mind, +nothing would please me so much as to serve you and the beasts. But I +should like to be sure about it, for where husband and wife are not of +one mind--well, it is uncomfortable!” + +Thereupon he told her how he had stood with the farmer and his wife; +and from that she led him on through his whole story--not +unaccompanied with tears on the part of his deliverer, for she was a +tender-souled as well as generous and friendly woman. In her heart she +rejoiced to think that the boy’s sufferings would now be at an end; +and thenceforward she was, as he always called her, his third mother. + +“My poor, ill-used child!” she said. “But I’ll be a mother to you--if +you’ll have me!” + +“You wouldn’t mind if I thought rather often of my two other mothers, +ma’am--would you?” he said. + +“God forbid, boy!” she answered. “If I were your real mother, would I +have my own flesh and blood ungrateful? Should I be proud of him for +loving nobody but me? That’s like the worst of the beasts: they love +none but their little ones--and that only till they’re tired of the +trouble of them!” + +“Thank you! Then I will be your son Clare, please, ma’am.” + +The next time they stopped, she made her husband come into her +caravan, and then and there she would and did have everything +arranged. When both her husband and the boy would have left his wages +undetermined, she would not hear of it, but insisted that so much a +week should be fixed at once to begin with. She had no doubt, she +said, that her husband would soon be ready enough to raise his wages; +but he must have his food and five shillings a week now, and +Mr. Halliwell must advance money to get him decent clothes: he might +keep the wages till the clothes were paid for! + +Everything she wished was agreed to by her husband, and at the next +town, Clare’s new mother saw him dressed to her satisfaction, and to +his own. She would have his holiday clothes better than his present +part in life required, and she would not let his sovereign go toward +paying for them: that she would keep ready in case he might want it! +Her eyes followed him about with anxious pride--as if she had been his +mother in fact as she was in truth. + +He had at once plenty to do. The favour of his mother saved him from +no kind of work, neither had he any desire it should. Every morning he +took his share in cleaning out the cages, and in setting water for the +beasts, and food for the birds and such other creatures as took it +when they pleased. At the proper intervals he fed as many as he might +of those animals that had stated times for their meals; and found the +advantage of this in its facilitating his friendly approaches to +them. He helped with the horses also--with whose harness and ways he +was already familiar. In a very short time he was known as a friend by +every civilized animal in and about the caravans. + +He did all that was required of him, and more. Not everyone of course +had a right to give him orders, but Clare was not particular as to who +wanted him, or for what. He was far too glad to have work to look at +the gift askance. He did not make trouble of what ought to be none, by +saying, with the spirit of a slave, “It’s not my place.” He did many +things which he might have disputed, for he never thought of disputing +them. Thus, both for himself and for others, he saved a great deal of +time, and avoided much annoyance and much quarrelling. Thus also he +gained many friends. + + + + + Chapter XLVII. + + GLUM GUNN. + + +He had but one enemy, and he did not make him such: he was one by +nature. For he was so different from Clare that he disliked him the +moment he saw him, and it took but a day to ripen his dislike into +hatred. Like Mr. Maidstone, he found the innocent fearlessness of +Clare’s expression repulsive. His fingers twitched, he said, to have a +twist at the sheep-nose of him. Unhappily for Clare, he was of +consequence in the menagerie, having money in the concern. He was +half-brother to the proprietor, but so unlike him that he might not +have had a drop of blood from the same source. An ill-tempered, +imperious man, he would hurt himself to have his way, for he was the +merest slave to what he fancied. When a man _will_ have a thing, right +or wrong, that man is a slave to that thing--the meanest of slaves, a +willing one. He was the terror of the men beneath him, heeding no man +but his brother--and him only because he knew “he would stand no +nonsense.” To his sister-in-law he was civil: she was his brother’s +wife, and his brother was proud of her! Also he knew that she was +perfect in her part of the business. So it was reason to stand as well +as he might with her! + +Clare had no suspicion that he more than disliked him. It took him +days indeed to discover even that he did not love him--notwithstanding +the bilious eye which, when its owner was idle, kept constantly +following him. And idle he often was, not from laziness, but from the +love of ordering about, and looking superior. + +It was natural that such a man should also be cruel. There are who +find their existence pleasant in proportion as they make that of +others miserable. He had no liking for any of the animals, regarding +them only as property with never a right;--as if God would make +anything live without thereby giving it rights! To Glum Gunn, as he +was commonly called behind his back, the animals were worth so much +money to sell, and so much to show. Yet he prided himself that he had +a great influence as well as power over them, an occult superiority +that made him their lord. It was merely a phase of the vulgarest +self-conceit. He posed to himself as a lion-tamer! He had never tamed +a lion, or any creature else, in his life; but when he had a wild +thing safe within iron bars, then he “let him know who was his +master!” By the terror of his whip, and means far worse, he compelled +obedience. The grizzly alone, of the larger animals, he never +interfered with. + +From the first he received Clare’s “_Good-morning, sir_,” with a +silent stare; and the boy at last, thinking he did not like to be so +greeted, gave up the salutation. This roused Gunn’s anger and +increased his hate. But indeed any boy petted by his sister-in-law, +would have been odious to him; and any boy whatever would have found +him a hard master. Clare was for a while protected by the man’s +unreadiness to have words with his brother, who always took his wife’s +part; but the tyrant soon learned that he might venture far. + +For he saw, by the boy’s ready smile, that he never resented anything, +which the brute, as most boys would have done, attributed to +cowardice; and he learned that he never carried tales to his sister, +of which, instead of admiring him for his reticence, he took +advantage, and set about making life bitter to him. + +It was some time before he began to succeed, for Clare was hard to +annoy. Patient, and right ready to be pleased, he could hardly imagine +offence intended; the thought was all but unthinkable to Clare’s +nature; so he let evil pass and be forgotten as if it had never been. +Once, as he ran along with a heavy pail of water, Gunn shot out his +foot and threw him down: he rose with a cut in his forehead, and a +smile on his lips. He carried the mark of the pail as long as he +carried his body, but it was long before he believed he had been +tripped up. Had it been proved to him at the time, he would have taken +it as a joke, intending no hurt. He did not see the lurid smile on the +man’s face as he turned away, a smile of devilish delight at the +discomfiture of a hated fellow-creature. Gunn put him to the dirtiest +work--only to find that it did not trouble him: the boy was a rare +gentleman--unwilling another should have more that he might have less +of the disagreeable. I have two or three times heard him say that no +man had the right to require of another the thing he would think +degrading to himself. He said he learned this from the New Testament. +“But,” he said, “nothing God has made necessary, can possibly be +degrading. It may not be the thing for this or that man, at this or +that time, to do, but it cannot in itself be degrading.” + +The boy had to take his turn with several in acting showman to the +gazing crowd, and by and by the part fell to him oftenest. Each had +his own way of filling the office. One would repeat his information +like a lesson in which he was not interested, and expected no one else +to be interested. Another made himself the clown of the exhibition, +and joked as much and as well as he could. Gunn delighted in telling +as many lies as he dared: he must not be suspected of making fools of +his audience! Clare, who from books knew far more than any of the +others concerning the creatures in their wild state, and who, by +watching them because he loved them, had already noted things none of +the others had observed, and was fast learning more, talked to the +spectators out of his own sincere and warm interest, giving them from +his treasure things new and old--things he had read, and things he had +for himself discovered. Group after group of simple country people +would listen intently as he led them round, eager after every word; +and as any peg will do to hang hate upon, even this success was noted +with evil eye by Glum Gunn. Almost anything served to increase his +malignity. Whether or not it grew the faster that he had as yet found +no wider outlet for it, I cannot tell. + +At last, however, the tyrant learned how to inflict the keenest pain +on the tender-hearted boy, counting him the greater idiot that he +could so “be got at,” as he phrased it, and promising himself much +enjoyment from the discovery. But he did not know--how should he +know--what love may compel! + + + + + Chapter XLVIII. + + THE PUMA. + + +I need hardly say that by this time all the beasts with any +friendliness in them had for Clare a little more than their usual +amount of that feeling. But there was one between whom and him--I +prefer _who_ to _which_ for certain animals--a real friendship had +begun at once, and had grown and ripened rapidly till it was strong on +both sides. Clare’s new friend--and companion as much as circumstance +permitted--was the same whose lonely gambols had so much attracted him +the night he first entered the menagerie. The animal, whom Clare had +taken for a young lion--without being so far wrong, for he has often +been called the American lion--was the puma, or couguar, peculiar to +America, with a relation to the jaguar, also American, a little +similar to that of the lion to the tiger. But while the jaguar is as +wicked a beast as the tiger, the puma possesses, in relation to man, +far more than the fabulous generosity of the lion. Like every good +creature he has been misunderstood and slandered, but a few have known +him. He has doubtless degenerated in districts, for as the wild animal +must gradually disappear before the human, he cannot help becoming in +the process less friendly to humanity; but an essential and +distinctive characteristic of the puma is his love for the human +being--a love persistent, devoted, and long-suffering. + +Between such an animal and Clare, it is not surprising that friendship +should at once have blossomed. He stroked the paw of the Indian lion +the first morning, but the day was not over when he was stroking the +cheek of the puma; while all he could do with the grizzly at the end +of the month was to feed him a little on the sly, and get for thanks a +growl of the worse hate. There are men that would soonest tear their +benefactors, loathing them the more that they cannot get at them. I +suspect that in some mysterious way Glum Gunn and the bear were own +brothers. With the elephant Clare did what he pleased--never pleasing +anything that was not pleasing to the elephant. + +They came to a town where they exhibited every day for a week, and +there it was that the friendship of Clare and the puma reached its +perfection. One night the boy could not sleep, and drawn by his love, +went down among the cages to see how his fellow-creatures were getting +through the time of darkness. There was just light enough from a small +moon to show the dim outlines of the cages, and the motion without the +form of any moving animal. The puma, in his solitary yet joyous +gymnastics, was celebrating the rites of freedom according to his +custom. When Clare entered, he made a peculiar purring noise, and +ceased his amusement--a game at ball, with himself for the ball. Clare +went to him, and began as usual to stroke him on the face and nose; +whereupon the puma began to lick his hand with his dry rough +tongue. Clare wondered how it could be nice to have such a dry thing +always in his mouth, but did not pity him for what God had given +him. He had his arm through between the bars of the cage, and his face +pressed close against them, when suddenly the face of the animal was +rubbing itself against what it could reach of his. The end was, that +Clare drew aside the bolt of the cage-door, and got in beside the +puma. The creature’s gladness was even greater than if he had found a +friend of his own kind. Noses and cheeks and heads were rubbed +together; tongue licked, and hand stroked and scratched. Then they +began to frolic, and played a long time, the puma jumping over Clare, +and Clare, afraid to jump lest he should make a noise, tumbling over +the puma. The boy at length went fast asleep; and in the morning found +the creature lying with his head across his body, wide awake but +motionless, as if guarding him from disturbance. Nobody was stirring; +and Clare, who would not have their friendship exposed to every +comment, crept quietly from the cage, and went to his own bed. + +The next night, as soon as the place was quiet, Clare went down, and +had another game with the puma. Before their sport was over, he had +begun to teach him some of the tricks he had taught Abdiel; but he +could not do much for fear of making a noise and alarming some keeper. + +The same thing took place, as often as it was possible, for some +weeks, and Clare came to have as much confidence, in so far at least +as good intention was concerned, in the puma as in Abdiel. If only he +could have him out of the cage, that the dear beast might have a +little taste of old liberty! But not being certain how the puma would +behave to others, or if he could then control him, he felt he had no +right to release him. + +Now and then he would fall asleep in the cage, whereupon the puma +would always lie down close beside him. Whether the puma slept, I do +not know. + +On one such occasion, Clare started to his feet half-awake, roused by +a terrific roar. Right up on end stood the couguar, flattening his +front against the bars of the cage, which he clawed furiously, +snarling and spitting and yelling like the huge cat he was, every +individual hair on end, and his eyes like green lightning. Clatter, +clatter, went his great feet on the iron, as he tore now at this bar +now at that, to get at something out in the dim open space. It was too +dark for Clare to see what it was that thus infuriated him, but his +ear discovered what his eye could not. For now and then, woven into +the mad noise of the wild creature, in which others about him were +beginning to join, he heard the modest whimper of a very tame +one--Abdiel, against whose small person, gladly as he would have been +“naught a while,” this huge indignation was levelled. Must there not +be a deeper ground for the enmity of dogs and cats than evil human +incitement? Their antipathy will have to be explained in that history +of animals which I have said must one day be written. + +Clare had taken much pains to make Abdiel understand that he was not +to intrude where his presence was not desired--that the show was not +for him, and thought the dog had learned perfectly that never on any +pretence, or for any reason, was he to go down those steps, however +often he saw his master go down. This prohibition was a great trial to +Abdiel’s loving heart, but it had not until this night been a trial +too great for his loving will. + +When Clare left him, he thought he had taken his usual pains in +shutting him into a small cage he had made to use on such occasions, +lest he might be tempted to think, when he saw nobody about, that the +law no longer applied. But he had not been careful enough; and Abdiel, +sniffing about and finding his door unfastened, had interpreted the +fact as a sign that he might follow his master. Hence all the +coil. For pumas--whereby also must hang an explanation in that book of +zoology, have an intense hatred of dogs. Tame from cubhood, they never +get over their antipathy to them. With pumas it is “Love you, hate +your dog.” In the present case there could be no individual jealousy, +of which passion beasts and birds are very capable, for Pummy had +never seen Abby before. There may be in the puma an inborn jealousy of +dogs, as a race more favoured than pumas by the man whom yet they love +perhaps more passionately. + +As soon as Clare saw what the matter was, he slipped out of the cage, +and catching up the obnoxious offender--where he stood wagging all +over as if his entire body were but a self-informed tail--sped with +him to his room, and gave him a serious talking-to. + +The puma was quiet the moment the dog was out of his sight. Doubtless +he regarded Clare as his champion in distress, and blessed him for the +removal of that which his soul hated. But, alas, mischief was already +afoot! Gunn, waked by the roaring, came flying with his whip, and the +remnants of poor Pummy’s excitement were enough to betray him to the +eyes of the tamer of caged animals. Clare would have recognized by the +roar itself the individual in trouble; but Glum Gunn had little +knowledge even of the race. He counted the couguar a coward, because +he showed no resentment. A man may strike him or wound him, and he +will make no retaliation; he will even let a man go on to kill him, +and make no defence beyond moans and tears. But Gunn knew nothing of +these facts; he only knew that this puma would not touch _him_. He was +not aware that if he turned the two into the arena of the show, the +puma would kill the grizzly; or that in their own country, the puma +persecutes the jaguar as if he hated him for not being like himself, +the friend of man: the Gauchos of the Pampas call him “The Christians’ +Friend.” Gunn did not even know that the horse is the puma’s favourite +food: he will leap on the back of a horse at full speed, with his paws +break his neck as he runs, and come down with him in a rolling +heap. Neither did he know that, while submissive to man--as if the +maker of both had said to him, “Slay my other creatures, but do my +anointed no harm,”--he could yet upon occasion be provoked to punish +though not to kill him. + +Glum Gunn rushed across the area, jumped into the cage of the puma, +and began belabouring him with his whip. The beast whimpered and wept, +and the brute belaboured him. Clare heard the changed cry of his +friend, and came swooping like the guardian angel he was. When he saw +the patient creature on his haunches like a dog, accepting Gunn’s +brutality without an attempt to escape it--except, indeed, by dodging +any blows at his head so cleverly that the ruffian could not once hit +it--he bounded to the cage, wild with anger and pity. But Gunn stood +with his back against the door of it, and he was reduced to entreaty. + +“Oh, sir! sir!” he cried, in a voice full of tears; “it was all my +fault! Abby came to look for me, and I didn’t know Pummy disliked +dogs!” + +“Do you tell me, you rascal, that you were down among the hanimals +when I supposed you in your bed?” + +“Yes, sir, I was. I didn’t know there was any harm. I wasn’t doing +anything wrong.” + +“Hold your jaw! What _was_ you doing?” + +“I was only in the cage with the puma.” + +“You was! You have the impudence to tell me that to my face! I’ll +teach you, you cotton-face! you milk-pudding! to go corrupting the +hanimals and making them not worth their salt!” + +He swung himself out of the cage-door in a fury, but Clare, with his +friend in danger, would not run. The wretch seized him by the collar, +and began to lash him as he had been lashing the puma. Happily he was +too close to him to give him such stinging blows. + +With the first hiss of the thong, came a tearing screech from the +puma, as he flung himself in fury upon the door of his cage. Gunn in +his wrath with Clare had forgotten to bolt it. Dragging with his +claws, he found it unfastened, pulled it open, and like a huge shell +from a mortar, shot himself at Gunn. Down he went. For one moment the +puma stood over him, swinging his tail in great sweeps, and looking at +him, doubtless with indignation. Then before Clare could lay hold of +him, for Clare too had fallen by the onset, Pummy turned a scornful +back upon his enemy, and walking away with a slow, careless stride, as +if he were not worth thinking of more, leaped into his cage, and lay +down. The thing passed so swiftly that Clare did not see him touch the +man with his paw, and thought he had but thrown him down with his +weight. The beast, however, had not left the brute without the lesson +he needed; he had given him just one little pat on the side of the +head. + +[Illustration: CLARE FINDS THE ADVANTAGE OF A POWERFUL FRIEND.] + +Gunn rose staggering. The skin and something more was torn down his +cheek from the temple almost to the chin, and the blood was +streaming. Clare hastened to help him, but he flung him aside, +muttering with an oath, “I’ll make you pay for this!” and went out, +holding his head with both hands. + +Clare went and shot the bolt of the cage. Pummy sprang up. His tail +and swift-shifting feet showed eager expectation of a romp. He had +already forgotten the curling lash of the terrible whip! But Clare +bade him good-night with a kiss through the bars. + +Glum Gunn kept his bed for more than a week. When at length he +appeared, a demonstration of the best art of the surgeon of the town, +he was not beautiful to look upon. To the end of his evil earthly days +he bore an ugly scar; and neither his heart nor his temper were the +better for his well deserved punishment. + +Mrs. Halliwell questioned Clare about the whole thing, inquiring +further and further as his answers suggested new directions. Her +catechism ended with a partial discovery of Gunn’s behaviour to her +_protegé_, whom she loved the more that he had been so silent +concerning it. She stood perturbed. One moment her face flushed with +anger, the next turned pale with apprehension. She bit her lip, and +the tears came in her eyes. + +“Never mind, mother,” said Clare, who saw no reason for such emotion; +“I’m not afraid of him.” + +“I know you’re not, sonny,” she answered; “but that don’t make me the +less afraid for you. He’s a bad man, that brother-in-law of mine! I +fear he’ll do you a mischief. I’m afraid I did wrong in taking you! I +ought to have done what I could for you without keeping you about +me. We can’t get rid of him because he’s got money in the business. +Not that he’s part owner--I don’t mean that! If we’d got the money +handy, we’d pay him off at once!” + +“I don’t care about myself,” said Clare. “I don’t mean I like to be +kicked, but it don’t make me miserable. What I can’t bear is to see +him cruel to the beasts. I love the beasts, mother--even cross old +Grizzly.--But Mr. Gunn don’t meddle much with _him_!” + +“He respects his own ugly sort!” answered Mrs. Halliwell, with a +laugh. + +For a while it was plain to Clare that the master kept an eye on his +brother, and on himself and the puma. On one occasion he told the +assembled staff that he would have no tyranny: every one knew there +was among them but one tyrant. Gunn saw that his brother was awake and +watching: it was a check on his conduct, but he hated Clare the +worse. For the puma, he was afraid of him now, and went no more into +his cage. + +With the rest of the men Clare was a favourite, for they knew him true +and helpful, and constantly the same: they could always depend on him! +Abdiel shared in the favour shown his master. They said the dog was no +beauty, and had not a hair of breeding, but he was almost a human +creature, if he wasn’t too good for one, and it was a shame to kick +him. + + + + + Chapter XLIX. + + GLUM GUNN’S REVENGE. + + +They had opened the menagerie in a certain large town. It was the +evening-exhibition, and Clare was going his round with his wand of +office, pointing to the different animals, and telling of them what he +thought would most interest his hearers, when another attendant, the +most friendly of all, came behind him, and whispered that Glum Gunn had +got hold of Abby, and must be going to do the dog a mischief. Clare +instantly gave him his wand, and bolted through the crowd, reproaching +himself that, because Abby seemed restless, he had shut him up: if he +had not been shut up, Gunn would not have got hold of him! + +When he reached the top of the steps, there was Gunn on the platform, +addressing the crowd. It was plain to the boy, by this time not +inexperienced, that he had been drinking, and, though not drunk, had +taken enough to rouse the worst in him. He had the poor dog by the +scruff of the neck, and was holding him out at arm’s-length. Abdiel +was the very picture of wretchedness. Except in colour and size, he +was more like a flea than like any sort of dog--with his hind legs +drawn up, his tail tucked in tight between them, and his back-bone +curved into a half circle. In this uncomfortable plight, the tyrant +was making a burlesque speech about him. + +“Here you see, ladies and gentlemen,” he said, resuming a little, for +a few fresh spectators were in the act of joining the border of the +crowd, “as I have already had the honour of informing you, one of the +most extraordinary productions of the vegetable kingdom. It is not +unnatural that you should be, as I see you are, inclined to dispute +the assertion. I am, indeed, far from being surprised at your +scepticism; the very strangeness of the phenomenon consists in his +being to all appearance neither more nor less than a dog. But when I +have the honour of leaving you to your astonishment, I shall have +convinced you that he is in reality nothing but a vegetable. I would +plainly call him what he is--a cucumber, did I not fear the statement +would demand of you more than your powers of credence, evidently +limited, could well afford. But when I have, before your eyes, cut the +throat of this vegetable, so extremely like an ugly mongrel, and when +those eyes see no single drop of blood follow the knife, then you will +be satisfied of the truth of my assertion; and, having gazed on such a +specimen of Nature’s jugglery, will, I hope, do me the honour to walk +up and behold yet greater wonders within.” + +He ceased, and set about getting his knife from his pocket. + +Clare, watching Gunn’s every motion, had partially sheltered himself +behind the side of the doorway. One who did not know Gunn, might well +have taken the thing for a practical joke, as innocent as it was +foolish, the pretended conclusion of which would be met by some +comical frustration, probably the dog’s escape; but Clare saw that his +friend was in mortal peril. With the eye of one used to wild animals +and the unexpectedness of their sudden motions, he stood following +every movement of Gunn’s hands, ready to anticipate whatever action +might indicate its own approach: he watched like the razor-clawed +lynx. While Gunn held Abdiel as he did, he could not seriously injure +him; and although he was hurting him dreadfully, his hate-possessed +fingers, like a live, writhing vice, worrying and squeezing the skin +of his poor little neck, it yet was better to wait the right moment. + +When he saw the arm that held the dog drawn in, and the other hand +move to the man’s pocket, he knew that in a moment more, with a +theatrical cry of dismay from the murderer, the body of his friend +would be dashed on the ground, his head half off, and the blood +streaming from his neck. They were mostly a rather vulgar people that +stood about the platform, not a few of them capable of being delighted +with such an end to a joke poor without some catastrophe. + +The wretch had stooped a little, and slightly relaxed his hold on the +dog to open his knife, when with a bound that doubled the force of the +blow Clare struck him on the side of the head. He had no choice where +to hit him, and his fist fell on the spot so lately torn by the claws +of Pummy. The tyrant fell, and lay for a moment stunned. Abdiel flung +himself on his master, exultant at finding the thing after all the +joke he had been trying in vain to believe it. Clare caught him up and +dashed down the steps, one instant before Glum Gunn rose, cursing +furiously. Clare charged the crowd: it was not a time to be civil! +Abdiel’s life was in imminent danger! That his own was in the same +predicament did not occur to him. + +His sudden rush took the crowd by surprise, or those next the caravans +would, I fear, have stopped him. Some started to follow him, but the +portion of the crowd he came to next, had more in it of a better sort, +and closed up behind him. There all the women and most of the men took +the part of the boy that loved his dog. + +“What be you a-shovin’ at?” bawled a huge country-man, against whom +Gunn made a cannon as he rushed in pursuit. “Aw’ll knock ’ee flat--aw +wull! Let little un an’ ’s dawg aloan! Aw be for un! Hit me an’ ye +choose--aw doan’t objec’!” + +Every attempt Gunn made to pass him, the man pushed his great body in +his way, and he soon saw there was no chance of overtaking Clare. The +wings of Hate are swift, but not so swift as those of rescuing Love; +and Help is far readier to run to Love than to Hate. + + + + + Chapter L. + + CLARE SEEKS HELP. + + +Clare got out of the crowd, and was soon beyond sight of anyone that +knew what had taken place, his heart exulting that he had saved his +friend who trusted in him. He hurried on, heedless whither, his only +thought to get away from the man that would murder Abby; and the town +was a long way behind ere the question of what they were to do for +supper and shelter presented itself. This had grown a strange thought, +so long had the caravan been to him a house of warmth and plenty. But +comfort has its disadvantages; and Clare discovered, with some dismay, +that he was not quite so free as ere the luxurious life of the last +few weeks began: both Abby and he would be less able, he feared, to +bear hunger and cold. It was but to start afresh, however, and grow +abler! One consolation was, that, if they felt hunger more, it could +not do them so much harm: they had more capital to go upon. He must +not gather cowardice instead of courage from a season of prosperity! +He was glad for Abdiel, though, that he grew his own clothes: he had +left his warmest behind him. + +It made him ashamed to find himself regretting his clothes when he had +lost a mother! Then it pleased him to think that she had his +sovereign, and the wages due since his clothes were paid for. They +would help to give Glum Gunn his own, and set the beasts free from +him! Then he would go back and spend his life with his mother and +Pummy! Poor Pummy! But though Gunn hated him, he was now afraid of him +too; and his fear would be the creature’s protection! He had imagined +it his might that cowed the puma, when it was the animal’s human +gentleness that made him submissive to man: he knew better now! Clare +clasped Abdiel to his bosom, and trudged on. They had gone miles ere +it occurred to him that it might be more comfortable for both if each +carried his individual burden. He set Abdiel down, and the dog ran +vibrating with pleasure. Clare felt himself set down, but with no tail +to wag. + +It was late in the autumn: they could do without supper, but they must +if possible find shelter! A farm-house came in sight. It recalled so +vividly Clare’s early experiences of houselessness, that beasts and +caravans, his mother and Glum Gunn, grew hazy and distant, and the old +time drew so near that he seemed to have waked into it out of a long +dream. They were back in the old misery--a misery in which, however, +his heart had not been pierced as now with the pangs of innocent +creatures unable or unwilling to defend themselves from their natural +guardian! It was long before he learned that for weeks Gunn was unable +to hurt one of them; that his drinking, his late wound, and the blow +Clare had given him, brought on him a severe attack of erysipelas. + +When they reached the farm-yard, Clare knew by the aspect of things +that the cattle were housed and the horses suppered. He crept unseen +into one of the cow-houses: the bodies and breath of the animals would +keep them warm! How sweet the smell seemed to him after that of the +caravans! An empty stall was before him, like a chamber prepared for +his need. He gathered a few straws from under each of the cows, taking +care that not one of them should be the less comfortable, and spread +with them for Abby and himself a thin couch. + +But with the excitement of what had happened, his wonder as to what +would come next, and the hunger that had begun to gnaw at him, Clare +could not sleep. And as he lay awake, thoughts came to him. + +Whence do the thoughts come to us? Of one thing I am sure--that I do +not make or even send for my own thoughts. If some greater one did not +think about us, we should not think about anything. Then what a wonder +is the night! How it works, compelling people to think! Surely somehow +God comes nearer in the night! Clare began to think how helpless he +was. He was not thinking of food and warmth, but of doing things for +the beings he loved. It seemed to him hard that he could but love, and +nothing more. There was his mother! he could do nothing to deliver her +from that villainous brother-in-law! There was Pummy, exposed to the +cruelty of the same evil man! and again he could do nothing for him! +There was Maly! he could do nothing for her--nothing to make her +father and mother glad for her up in the dome of the angels! + +Was it possible that he really could do nothing? + +Then came the thought that people used to say prayers in the days when +he went with his mother to church. He had been taught to say prayers +himself, but had begun to forget them when there was no bed to kneel +beside. What did saying prayers mean? In the Bible-stories people +prayed when they were in trouble and could not help themselves! Did it +matter that he had no church and no bedside? Surely one place must be +as good as another, if it was true that God was everywhere! Surely he +could hear him wherever he spoke! Neither could there be any necessity +for speaking loud! God would hear, however low he spoke! Then he +remembered that God knew the thoughts of his creatures: if so, he +might think a prayer to him; there was no need for any words! + +From the moment of that conclusion, Clare began to pray to God. And +now he prayed the right kind of prayer; that is, his prayers were real +prayers; he asked for what he wanted. To say prayers asking God for +things we do not care about, is to mock him. When we ask for something +we want, it may be a thing God does not care to give us; but he likes +us to speak to him about it. If it is good for us, he will give it us; +if it is not good, he will not give it to us, for it would hurt +us. But Clare only asked God to do what he is always doing: his prayer +was that God would be good to all his mothers, and to his two fathers, +and Mr. Halliwell, and Maly, and Sarah, and his own baby, and +Tommy--and poor Pummy, and would, if Glum Gunn beat him, help him to +bear the blows, and not mind them very much. He ended with something +like this: + +“God, I can’t do anything for anybody! I wish I could! You can get +near them, God: please do something good to every one of them because +I can’t. I think I could go to sleep now, if I were sure you had +listened!” + +Having thus cast all his cares on God, he did go to sleep; and woke in +the morning ready for the new day that arrived with his waking. + + + + + Chapter LI. + + CLARE A TRUE MASTER. + + +It would take a big book to tell all the things of interest that +happened to Clare in the next few weeks. They would be mainly how and +where he found refuge, and how he and Abdiel got things to eat. Verily +they did not live on the fat of the land. Now and then some benevolent +person, seeing him in such evident want, would contrive a job in order +to pay him for it: in one place, although they had no need of him, +certain good people gave him ten days’ work under a gardener, and +dismissed him with twenty shillings in his pocket. + +One way and another, Clare and Abdiel did not die of hunger or of +cold. That is the summary of their history for a good many weeks. + +One night they slept on a common, in the lee of a gypsy tent, and +contrived to get away in the morning without being seen. For Clare +feared they might offer him something stolen, and hunger might +persuade him to ask no questions. Many respectable people will laugh +at the idea of a boy being so particular. Such are immeasurably more +to be pitied than Clare. No one could be hard on a boy who in such +circumstances took what was offered him, but he would not be so honest +as Clare--though he might well be more honest than such as would laugh +at him. + +Another time he went up to a large house, to see if he might not there +get a job. He found the place, for the time at least, abandoned: I +suppose the persons in charge had deserted their post to make +holiday. He lingered about until the evening fell, and then got with +Abdiel under a glass frame in the kitchen-garden. But the glass was so +close to them that Clare feared breaking it; so they got out again, +and lay down on a bench in a shed for potting plants. + +Clare was waked in the morning by a sound cuff on the side of the +head. He got off the bench, took up Abdiel, and coming to himself, +said to the gardener who stood before him in righteous indignation, + +“I’m much obliged to you for my bedroom, sir. It was very cold last +night.” + +His words and respectful manner mollified the gardener a little. + +“You have no business here!” he returned. + +“I know that, sir; but what is a boy to do?” answered Clare. “I wasn’t +hurting anything, and it was so cold we might have died if we had +slept out of doors.” + +“That’s no business of mine!” + +“But it is of mine,” rejoined Clare; “--except you think a boy that +can’t get work ought to commit suicide. If he mustn’t do that, he +can’t always help doing what people with houses don’t like!” + +The gardener was not a bad sort of fellow, and perceived the truth in +what the boy said. + +“That’s always the story!” he replied, however. “Can’t get work! No +idle boy ever could get work! I know the sort of you--well!” + +“Would you mind giving me a chance?” returned Clare eagerly. “I +wouldn’t ask much wages.” + +“You wouldn’t, if you asked what you was worth!” + +“We’d be worth our victuals anyhow!” answered Clare, who always +counted the dog. + +“Who’s we?” asked the man. “Be there a hundred of you?” + +“No; only two. Only me and Abdiel here!” + +“Oh, that beast of a mongrel?” + +The gardener made a stride as if to seize the dog. Clare bounded from +him. The man burst into a mocking laugh. + +“He’s a good dog, indeed, sir!” said Clare. + +“You’ll give him the sack before I give you a job.” + +“We’re old friends, sir; we can’t be parted!” + +“I thought as much!” cried the gardener. “They’re always ready to +work, an’ so hungry! But will they part with the mangy dog? Not they! +Hard work and good wages ain’t nowhere beside a mongrel pup! Get out! +Don’t I know the whole ugly bilin’ of ye!” + +Clare turned away with a gentle good-morning, which the man did not +get out of his heart for a matter of two days, and departed, hugging +Abdiel. + +He was often cold and always hungry, but his life was anything but +dull. The man who does not know where his next meal is to come from, +is seldom afflicted with ennui. That is the monopoly of the enviable +with nothing to do, and everything money can get them. A foolish +west-end life has immeasurably more discomfort in it than that of a +street Arab. The ordinary beggar, while in tolerable health, finds far +more enjoyment than most fashionable ladies. + +Thus Clare went wandering long, seeking work, and finding next to +none--all the time upheld by the feeling that something was waiting +for him somewhere, that he was every day drawing nearer to it. Not +once yet had he lost heart. In very virtue of unselfishness and lack +of resentment, he was strong. Not once had he shed a tear for himself, +not once had he pitied his own condition. + + + + + Chapter LII. + + MISS TEMPEST. + + +Without knowing it, he was approaching the sea. Walking along a chain +of downs, he saw suddenly from the top of one of them, for the first +time in his memory though not in his life, the sea--a pale blue cloud, +as it appeared, far on the horizon, between two low hills. The sight +of it, although he did not at first know what it was, brought with it +a strange inexplicable feeling of dolorous pleasure. For this he could +not account. It was the faintest revival of an all but obliterated +impression of something familiar to his childhood, lying somewhere +deeper than the memory, which was a blank in regard to it. But that +feeling was not all that the sight awoke in him. The pale blue cloud +bore to him such a look of the eternal, that it seemed the very place +for God to live in--the solemn, stirless region of calm in which the +being to whom now of late he had first begun in reality to pray, kept +his abode. The hungry, worn, tattered boy, with nothing to call his +own but a great hope and a little dog, fell down on his bare knees on +the hard road, and stretched out his hands in an ecstasy toward the +low cloud. + +The far-off ringing tramp of a horse’s feet aroused him. He rose light +as an athlete, the great hope grown twice its former size, and hunger +forgotten. + +The blue cloud kept in sight, and by and by he knew it was the sea he +saw, though how or at what moment the knowledge came to him he could +not have told. The track was leading him toward one of the principal +southern ports. + +By this time he was again very thin; but he had brown cheeks and clear +eyes, and, save when suffering immediately from hunger, felt perfectly +well. Hunger is a sad thing notwithstanding its deep wholesomeness; +but there is immeasurably more suffering in the world from eating too +much than from eating too little. + +Well able by this time to read the signs of the road, he perceived at +length he must be drawing near a town. He had already passed a house +or two with a little lawn in front, and indications of a garden +behind; and he hoped yet again that here, after all, he might get +work. To door after door he carried his modest request: some doors +were shut in his face almost before he could speak; at others he had a +civil word from maid, or a rough word from man; from none came sound +of assent. It had become harder too to find shelter. Ever as he went, +space was more and more appropriated and enclosed; less and less room +was left for the man for whom had been made no special cubic provision +of earth and air, and who had no money--the most disreputable of +conditions in the eyes of such as would be helpless if they had +none. A rare philosopher for eyes capable of understanding him, he was +a despicable being in the eyes of the common man. To know a human +being one must be human--that is, the divine must be strong in him. + +For some days now, neither Clare nor Abdiel had come even within sight +of food enough to make a meal. The dog was rather thinner than his +master. + +“Abdiel,” said Clare to him one day, “I fear you will soon be a +serpent! Your body gets longer and longer, and your legs get shorter +and shorter: you’ll be crawling presently, rubbing the hair off your +useless little belly on the dusty road! Never mind, Abdiel; you’ll be +a good serpent. Satan was turned into a bad serpent because he was a +bad angel; you will be a good serpent, because you are a good dog! I +hope, however, we shall yet put a stop to the serpent-business!” + +Abdiel wagged his tail, as much as to say, “All right, master!” + +The nights were now very cold; winter was coming fast. Had Clare been +long enough in one place for people to know him, he would never have +been allowed to go so cold and hungry; but he had always to move on, +and nobody had time to learn to care about him. So the terrible +sunless season threatened to wrap him in its winding-sheet, and lay +him down. + +One evening, just before sunset, grown sleepy in spite of the +gathering cold, he sat down on one of the two steep grassy slopes that +bordered the road. His feet were bare now, bare and brown, for his +shoes had come to such plight that it was a relief to throw them away; +but his soles had grown like leather. They rested in the dry shallow +rain-channel, and his body leaned back against the slope. Abdiel, +instead of jumping on the bank and lying in the soft grass, lay down +on the leathery feet, and covered them from the night with his long +faithful body and its coat of tangled hair. + +The sun was shooting his last radiance along the road, and its redness +caressed the sleeping companions, when an elderly lady came to her +gate at the top of the opposite slope, and looked along the road with +the sun. Her reverting glance fell upon the sleepers--the Knight of +Hope lying in rags, not marble, his feet not upon his dog, but his dog +upon his feet. It was a touching picture, and the old lady’s heart was +one easily touched. She looked and saw that the face of the boy, whose +hunger was as plain as his rags, was calm as the wintry sky. She +wondered, but she needed not have wondered; for storm of anger, +drought of greed, nor rotting mist of selfishness, had passed or +rested there, to billow, or score, or waste. + +Her mere glance seemed to wake Abdiel, who took advantage of his +waking to have a lick at the brown, dusty, brave, uncomplaining feet, +so well used to the world’s _via dolorosa_. She saw, and was touched +yet more by this ministration of the guardian of the feet. Gently +opening the gate, she descended the slope, crossed the road, and stood +silent, regarding the outcasts. No cloudy blanket covered the sky: ere +morning the dew would lie frozen on the grass! + +“You shouldn’t be sleeping there!” she said. + +Abdiel started to his four feet and would have snarled, but with one +look at the lady changed his mind. Clare half awoke, half sat up, made +an inarticulate murmur, and fell back again. + +“Get up, my boy,” said the old lady. “You must indeed!” + +“Oh, please, ma’am, must I?” answered Clare, slowly rising to his +feet. “I had but just lain down, and I’m so tired!--If I mayn’t sleep +_there_,” he continued, “where _am_ I to sleep?--Please, ma’am, why is +everybody so set against letting a boy sleep? It don’t cost them +anything! I can understand not giving him work, if he looks too much +in want of it; but why should they count it bad of him to lie down and +sleep?” + +The lady wisely let him talk; not until he stopped did she answer him. + +“It’s because of the frost, my boy!” she said. “It would be the death +of you to sleep out of doors to-night!” + +“It’s a nice place for it, ma’am!” + +“To sleep in? Certainly not!” + +“I didn’t mean that, ma’am. I meant a nice place to go away from--to +die in, ma’am!” + +“That is not ours to choose,” answered the old lady severely, but the +tone of her severity trembled. + +“I sha’n’t find anywhere so nice as this bank,” said Clare, turning +and looking at it sorrowfully. + +“There are plenty of places in the town. It’s but a mile farther on!” + +“But this is so much nicer, ma’am! And I’ve no money--none at all, +ma’am. When I came out of prison,--” + +“Came out of _where_?” + +“Out of prison, ma’am.” + +He had never been in prison in a legal sense, never having been +convicted of anything; but he did not know the difference between +detention and imprisonment. + +“Prison!” she exclaimed, holding up her hands in horror. “How dare you +mention prison!” + +“Because I was in it, ma’am.” + +“And to say it so coolly too! Are you not ashamed of yourself?” + +“No, ma’am.” + +“It’s a shame to have been in prison.” + +“Not if I didn’t do anything wrong.” + +“Nobody will believe that, I’m afraid!” + +“I suppose not, ma’am! I used to feel very angry when people wouldn’t +believe me, but now I see they are not to blame. And now I’ve got used +to it, and it don’t hurt so much.--But,” he added with a sigh, “the +worst of it is, they won’t give me any work!” + +“Do you always tell people you’ve come out of prison?” + +“Yes, ma’am, when I think of it.” + +“Then you can’t wonder they won’t give you work!” + +“I don’t, ma’am--not now. It seems a law of the universe!” + +“Not of the universe, I think--but of this world--perhaps!” said the +old lady thoughtfully. + +“But there’s one thing I do wonder at,” said Clare. “When I say I’ve +been in prison, they believe me; but when I say I haven’t done +anything wrong, then they mock me, and seem quite amused at being +expected to believe that. I can’t get at it!” + +“I daresay! But people will always believe you against yourself.--What +are you going to do, then, if nobody will give you work? You can’t +starve!” + +“Indeed I _can_, ma’am! It’s just the one thing I’ve got to do. We’ve +been pretty near the last of it sometimes--me and Abdiel! Haven’t we, +Abby?” + +The dog wagged his tail, and the old lady turned aside to control her +feelings. + +“Don’t cry, ma’am,” said Clare; “I don’t mind it--not _much_. I’m too +glad I didn’t _do_ anything, to mind it much! Why should I! Ought I to +mind it much, ma’am? Jesus Christ hadn’t done anything, and they +killed _him_! I don’t fancy it’s so very bad to die of only hunger! +But we’ll soon see!--Sha’n’t we, Abby?” + +Again the dog wagged his tail. + +“If you didn’t do anything wrong, what _did_ you do?” said the old +lady, almost at her wits’ end. + +“I don’t like telling things that are not going to be believed. It’s +like washing your face with ink!” + +“I will _try_ to believe you.” + +“Then I will tell you; for you speak the truth, ma’am, and so, +perhaps, will be able to believe the truth!” + +“How do you know I speak the truth?” + +“Because you didn’t say, ‘I will believe you.’ Nobody can be sure of +doing that. But you can be sure of _trying_; and you said, ‘I will +_try_ to believe you.’” + +“Tell me all about it then.” + +“I will, ma’am.--The policeman came in the middle of the night when we +were asleep, and took us all away, because we were in a house that was +not ours.” + +“Whose was it then?” + +“Nobody knew. It was what they call in chancery. There was nobody in +it but moths and flies and spiders and rats;--though I think the rats +only came to eat baby.” + +“Baby! Then the whole family of you, father, mother, and all, were +taken to prison!” + +“No, ma’am; my fathers and my mothers were taken up into the dome of +the angels.”--What with hunger and sleepiness, Clare was talking like +a child.--“I haven’t any father and mother in this world. I have two +fathers and two mothers up there, and one mother in this world. She’s +the mother of the wild beasts.” + +The old lady began to doubt the boy’s sanity, but she went on +questioning him. + +“How did you have a baby with you, then?” + +“The baby was my own, ma’am. I took her out of the water-butt.” + +Once more Clare had to tell his story--from the time, that is, when +his adoptive father and mother died. He told it in such a simple +matter-of-fact way, yet with such quaint remarks, from their very +simplicity difficult to understand, that, if the old lady, for all her +trying, was not able quite to believe his tale, it was because she +doubted whether the boy was not one of God’s innocents, with an +angel-haunted brain. + +“And what’s become of Tommy?” she asked. + +“He’s in the same workhouse with baby. I’m very glad; for what I +should have done with Tommy, and nothing to give him to eat, I can’t +think. He would have been sure to steal! I couldn’t have kept him from +it!” + +“You must be more careful of your company.” + +“Please, ma’am, I was very careful of Tommy. He had the best company I +could give him: I did try to be better for Tommy’s sake. But my trying +wasn’t much use to Tommy, so long as he wouldn’t try! He was a little +better, though, I think; and if I had him now, and could give him +plenty to eat, and had baby as well as Abdiel to help me, we might +make something of Tommy, I think.--_You_ think so--don’t you, Abdiel?” + +The dog, who had stood looking in his master’s face all the time he +spoke, wagged his tail faster. + +“What a name to give a dog! Where did you find it?” + +“In Paradise Lost, ma’am. Abdiel was the one angel, you remember, +ma’am, who, when he saw what Satan was up to, left him, and went back +to his duty.” + +“And what was his duty?” + +“Why of course to do what God told him. I love Abdiel, and because I +love the little dog and he took care of baby, I call him Abdiel +too. Heaven is so far off that it makes no confusion to have the same +name.” + +“But how dare you give the name of an angel to a dog?” + +“To a _good_ dog, ma’am! A good dog is good enough to go with any +angel--at his heels of course! If he had been a bad dog, it would have +been wicked to name him after a good angel. If the dog had been +Tommy--I mean if Tommy had been the dog, I should have had to call him +Moloch, or Belzebub! God made the angels and the dogs; and if the dogs +are good, God loves them.--Don’t he, Abdiel?” + +Abdiel assented after his usual fashion. The lady said nothing. Clare +went on. + +“Abdiel won’t mind--the angel Abdiel, I mean, ma’am--he won’t mind +lending his name to my friend. The dog will have a name of his own, +perhaps, some day--like the rest of us!” + +“What is _your_ name?” + +“The name I have now is, like the dog’s, a borrowed one. I shall get +my own one day--not here--but there--when--when--I’m hungry enough to +go and find it.” + +Clare had grown very white. He sat down, and lay back on the grass. He +had talked more in those few minutes than for weeks, and want had made +him weak. He felt very faint. The dog jumped up, and fell to licking +his face. + +“What a wicked old woman I am!” said the lady to herself, and ran +across the road like some little long-legged bird, and climbed the +bank swiftly. + +She disappeared within the gate, but to return presently with a +tumbler of milk and a huge piece of bread. + +“Here, boy!” she cried; “here is medicine for you! Make haste and take +it.” + +Clare sat up feebly, and stared at the tumbler for a moment. Either he +could hardly believe his eyes, or was too sick to take it at +once. When he had it in his hand, he held it out to the dog. + +“Here, Abdiel, have a little,” he said. + +This offended the old lady. + +“You’re never going to give the dog that good milk!” she cried. + +“A little of it, please, ma’am!” + +“--And feed him out of the tumbler too?” + +“He’s had nothing to-day, ma’am, and we’re comrades!” + +“But it’s not clean of you!” + +“Ah, you don’t know dogs, ma’am! His tongue is clean--as clean as +anybody’s.” + +Abdiel took three or four little laps of the milk, drew away, and +looked up at his master--as much as to say, “You, now!” + +“Besides,” Clare went on, “he couldn’t get at it so well in the bottom +of the tumbler.” + +With that he raised it to his own lips, drank eagerly, and set it on +the road half empty, looking his thanks to the giver with a smile she +thought heavenly. Then he broke the bread, and giving the dog nearly +the half of it, began to eat the rest himself. The old lady stood +looking on in silence, pondering what she was to do with the celestial +beggar. + +“Would you mind sleeping in the greenhouse, if I had a bed put up for +you?” she said at length, in tone apologetic. + +“This is a better place--though I wish it was warmer!” said Clare, +with another smile as he looked up at the sky, in which a few stars +were beginning to twinkle, and thought of the gardeners he had +met. “--Don’t you think it better, ma’am?” + +“No, indeed, I don’t!” she answered crossly; for to her the open air +at night seemed wrong, disreputable. There was something unholy in it! + +“I would rather stay here,” said Clare. + +“Why?” + +“Because you don’t quite believe me, ma’am. You can’t; and you can’t +help it. You wouldn’t be able to sleep for thinking that a boy just +out of prison was lying in the greenhouse. There would be no saying +what he might not do! I once read in a newspaper how an old lady took +a lad into her house for a servant, and he murdered her!--No, ma’am, +thank you! After such a supper we shall sleep beautifully!--Sha’n’t +we, Abby? And then, perhaps, you could give me a job in the garden +to-morrow! I daresay the gardener wants a little help sometimes! But +if he knew me to have slept in the greenhouse, he would hate me.” + +The old lady said nothing, for, like most old ladies, she feared her +gardener. She took the tumbler from the boy’s hand, and went into the +house. But in two minutes she came again, with another great piece of +bread for Clare, and a bone with something on it which she threw to +Abdiel. The dog’s ears started up, erect and alive, like individual +creatures, and his eyes gleamed; but he looked at his master, and +would not touch the bone without his leave--which given, he fell upon +it, and worried it as if it had been a rat. + +Clare was now himself again, and when the old lady left them for the +third time, he walked with her across the way, bread in hand, to open +the gate for her. When she was inside, he took off his cap, and bade +her good-night with a grace that won all that was left to be won of +her heart. + +Before she had taken three steps from the gate, the old lady turned. + +“Boy!” she called; and Clare, who was making for his couch under the +stars, hastened back at the sound of her voice. + +“I shall not be able to sleep,” she said, “for thinking of you out +there in the bleak night!” + +“I am used to it, ma’am!” + +“Oh, I daresay! but you see I’m not! and I don’t like the thought of +it! You may like hoarfrost-sheets, for what I know, but I don’t! You +may like the stars for a tester--because you want to die and go to +them, I suppose!--but I have no fancy for the stars! You are a foolish +fellow, and I am out of temper with you. You don’t give a thought to +me--or to my feelings if you should die! I should never go to bed +again with a good conscience!--Besides, I should have to nurse you!” + +The last member of her expostulation was hardly in logical sequence, +but it had not the less influence on Clare for that. + +“I will do whatever you please, ma’am,” he answered humbly. “--Come, +Abdiel!” + +The dog came running across the road with his bone in his mouth. + +“You mustn’t bring that inside the gate, Ab!” said Clare. + +The dog dropped it. + +“Good dog! It’s a lady’s garden, you know, Abdiel!” Then turning to +his hostess, Clare added, “I always tell him when I’m pleased with +him: don’t you think it right, ma’am?” + +“I daresay! I don’t know anything about dogs.” + +“If you had a dog like Abdiel, he would soon teach you dogs, ma’am!” +rejoined Clare. + +By this time they were at the house-door. The lady told him to wait +there, went in, and had a talk with her two maids. In half an hour, +Clare and his four-footed angel were asleep--in an outhouse, it is +true, but in a comfortable bed, such as they had not seen since their +flight from the caravans. The cold breeze wandered moaning like a lost +thing round the bare walls, as if every time it woke, it went abroad +to see if there was any hope for the world; but it did not touch them; +and if through their ears it got into their dreams, it made their +sleep the sweeter, and their sense of refuge the deeper. + +But although the bewitching boy and his good dog were not lying in the +open air over against her gate, and although never a thought of murder +or theft came to trouble her, it was long before the old lady found +repose. Her heart had been deeply touched. + + + + + Chapter LIII. + + THE GARDENER. + + +From the fact that his hostess made him no answer when he breathed the +hope of a job in her garden, Clare concluded that he had presumed in +suggesting the thing to her, and that she would be relieved by their +departure. When he woke in the morning, therefore, early after a grand +sleep, he felt he had no right to linger: he had been invited to sleep, +and he had slept! He also shrank from the idea of being supposed to +expect his breakfast before he went. So, as soon as he got up, he +walked out of the gate, crossed the road, and sat down on the spot he +had occupied the night before, there to wait until the house should +be astir. For, although he could not linger within gates where he was +unknown, neither could he slink away without morning-thanks for the +gift of a warm night. + +As he sat, he grew drowsy, and leaning back, fell fast asleep. + +The thoughts of his hostess had been running on very different lines, +and she woke with feelings concerning the pauper very different from +those the pauper imagined in her. She must do something for him; she +must give or get him work! As to giving him work, her difficulty lay in +the gardener. She resolved, however, to attempt over-coming it. + +She rose earlier than usual, therefore, and as the man, who did not +sleep in the house, was not yet come, she went down to the gate to +meet him and have the thing over--so eager was she, and so nervous in +prospect of such an interview with her dreaded servant. + +“Good gracious!” she murmured aloud, “does it rain beggars?” For there, +on the same spot, lay another beggar, another boy, with a dog in his +bosom the facsimile of the ugly white thing named after Milton’s angel! +She did not feel moved to go and make his acquaintance. It could not +be another of the family, could it? that had already heard of his +brother’s good luck, and come to see whether there might not be a +picking for him too! She turned away hurriedly lest he should wake, and +went back to the house. + +But looking behind her as she mounted the steps, she caught sight of +the gardener at the other gate, casting a displeased look across the +road before he entered: he did not like to see tramps about! Her heart +sank a little, but she was not to be turned aside. + +The gardener came in, and his mistress joined him and walked with him +to his work, telling him as much as she thought fit concerning the boy, +and interspersing her narrative with hints of the duty of giving every +one a chance. She took care not to mention that he had come out of a +prison somewhere. + +“No one should be driven to despair,” she said, little thinking she +used almost the very words of the Lord, according to the Sinaitic +reading of a passage in St. Luke’s gospel. + +The argument had little force with the rough Scotchman: his mistress +was soft-hearted! He shook his head ominously at the idea of giving a +tramp the chance of doing decent work, but at last consented, with a +show of being over-persuaded to an imprudent action, to let the boy +help him for a day, and see how he got on, stipulating, however, that +he should not be supposed to have pledged himself to anything. + +Miss Tempest’s plans went beyond the gardener’s scope. She had for +some months been inclined to have a boy to help in the house--an +inclination justified by a late unexpected accession of income: if +this boy were what he seemed, he would make a more than valuable +servant; and nothing could clear her judgment of him better, she +thought, than putting him to the test of a brief subjection to the +cross-grained, exacting Scotchman. By that she would soon know whether +to dismiss him, or venture with him farther! + +She had but just wrung his hard consent from the gardener, when the +cook came running, to say the boy was gone. Upon poor Miss Tempest’s +heart fell a cold avalanche. + +“But we’ve counted the spoons, ma’am, and they’re all right!” said the +cook. + +This additional statement, however, did not seem to give much +consolation to the benevolent old lady. She stood for a moment with +her eyes on the ground, too pained to move or speak. Then she started, +and ran to the gate. The cook ran after, thinking her mistress gone +out of her mind--and was sure of it when she saw her open the gate, +and run straight down the bank to the road. But when she reached the +gate herself, she saw her standing over a boy asleep on the grass of +the opposite bank. + +Abdiel, lying on his bosom, watched her with keen friendly eyes. Clare +was dreaming some agreeable morning-dream; for a smile of such +pleasure as could haunt only an innocent face, nickered on it like a +sunny ripple on the still water of a pool. + +“No!” said Miss Tempest to herself; “there’s no duplicity there! +Otherwise, a tree is not known by its fruit!” + +Clare opened his eyes, and started lightly to his feet, strong and +refreshed. + +“Good morning, ma’am!” he said, pulling off his cap. + +“Good morning--what am I to call you?” she returned. + +“Clare, if you please, ma’am.” + +“What is your Christian name?” + +“That is my Christian name, ma’am--Clare.” + +“Then what is your surname?” + +“I am called Porson, ma’am, but I have another name. Mr. Porson adopted +me.” + +“What is your other name?” + +“I don’t know, ma’am. I am going to know one day, I think; but the day +is not come yet.” + +He told her all he could about his adoptive parents, and little +Maly; but the time before he went to the farm was growing strangely +dreamlike, as if it had sunk a long way down in the dark waters of the +past--all up to the hour when Maly was carried away by the long black +aunt. + +The story accounted to Miss Tempest both for his good speech and +the name of his dog. The adopted child of a clergyman might well be +acquainted with _Paradise Lost_, though she herself had never read more +of it than the apostrophe to Light in the beginning of the third book! +That she had learned at school without understanding phrase or sentence +of it; while Clare never left passage alone until he understood it, or, +failing that, had invented a meaning for it. + +“Well, then, Clare, I’ve been talking to my gardener about you,” said +Miss Tempest. “He will give you a job.” + +“God bless you, ma’am! I’m ready!” cried Clare, stretching out his +arms, as if to get them to the proper length for work. “Where shall I +find him?” + +“You must have breakfast first.” + +She led the way to the kitchen. + +The cook, a middle-aged woman, looked at the dog, and her face +puckered all over with points of interrogation and exclamation. + +“Please, cook, will you give this young man some breakfast? He wanted +to go to work without any, but that wouldn’t do--would it, cook?” said +her mistress. + +“I hope the dog won’t be running in and out of my kitchen all day, +ma’am!” + +“No fear of that, cook!” said Clare; “he never leaves me.” + +“Then I don’t think--I’m afraid,” she began, and stopped. “--But +that’s none of my business,” she added. “John will look after his +own--and more!” + +Miss Tempest said nothing, but she almost trembled; for John, she +knew, had a perfect hatred of dogs. Nor could anyone wonder, for, gate +open or gate shut, in they came and ran over his beds. She dared not +interfere! He and Clare must settle the question of Abdiel or no +Abdiel between them! She left the kitchen. + +The cook threw the dog a crust of bread, and Abdiel, after a look at +his master, fell upon it with his white, hungry little teeth. Then she +proceeded to make a cup of coffee for Clare, casting an occasional +glance of pity at his garments, so miserably worn and rent, and his +brown bare feet. + +“How on the face of this blessed world, boy, do you expect to work in +the garden without shoes?” she said at length. + +“Most things I can do well enough without them,” answered Clare; +“--even digging, if the ground is not very hard. My feet used to be +soft, but now the soles of them are like leather.--They’ve grown their +own shoes,” he added, with a smile, and looked straight in her eyes. + +The smile and the look went far to win her heart, as they had won +that of her mistress: she felt them true, and wondered how such a +fair-spoken, sweet-faced boy could be on the tramp. She poured him +out a huge cup of coffee, fried him a piece of bacon, and cut him +as much bread and butter as he could dispose of. He had not often +eaten anything but dry bread, in general very dry, since he left the +menagerie, and now felt feasted like an emperor. Pleased with the +master, the cook fed the dog with equal liberality; and then, curious +to witness their reception by John, between whom and herself was +continuous feud, she conducted Clare to the gardener. From a distance +he saw them coming. With look irate fixed upon the dog, he started to +meet them. Clare knew too well the meaning of that look, and saw in him +Satan regarding Abdiel with eye of fire, and the words on his lips-- + + “And fly, ere evil intercept thy flight.” + +The moment he came near enough, without word, or show of malice beyond +what lay in his eye, he made, with the sharp hoe he carried, a sudden +downstroke at the faithful angel, thinking to serve him as Gabriel +served Moloch. But Abdiel was too quick for him: he had read danger in +his very gait the moment he saw him move, and enmity in his eyes when +he came nearer. He kept therefore his own eyes on the hoe, and never +moved until the moment of attack. Then he darted aside. The weapon +therefore came down on the hard gravel, jarring the arm of his +treacherous enemy. With a muttered curse John followed him and made +another attempt, which Abdiel in like manner eluded. John followed and +followed; Abdiel fled and fled--never farther than a few yards, +seeming almost to entice the man’s pursuit, sometimes pirouetting on +his hind legs to escape the blows which the gardener, growing more and +more furious with failure, went on aiming at him. Fruitlessly did +Clare assure him that neither would the dog do any harm, nor allow any +one to hit him. It was from very weariness that at last he desisted, +and wiping his forehead with his shirt-sleeve, turned upon Clare in +the smothered wrath that knows itself ridiculous. For all the time the +cook stood by, shaking with delighted laughter at his every fresh +discomfiture. + +[Illustration: THE GARDENER’S DISCOMFITURE.] + +“Awa’, ye deil’s buckie,” he cried, “an tak’ the little Sawtan wi’ ye! +Dinna lat me see yer face again.” + +“But the lady told me you would give me a job!” said Clare. + +“I didna tell her I wad gie yer tyke a job! I wad though, gien he wad +lat me!” + +“He’s given you a stiff one!” said the cook, and laughed again. + +The gardener took no notice of her remark. + +“Awa’ wi’ ye!” he cried again, yet more wrathfully, “--or--” + +He raised his hand. + +Clare looked in his eyes and did not budge. + +“For shame, John!” expostulated the cook. “Would you strike a child?” + +“I’m no child, cook!” said Clare. “He can’t hurt me much. I’ve had a +good breakfast!” + +“Lat ’im tak’ awa’ that deevil o’ a tyke o’ his, as I tauld him,” +thundered the gardener, “or I’ll mak’ a pulp o’ ’im!” + +“I’ve had such a breakfast, sir, as I’m bound to give a whole day’s +work in return for,” said Clare, looking up at the angry man; “and I +won’t stir till I’ve done it. Stolen food on my stomach would turn me +sick!” + +“Gien it did, it wadna be the first time, I reckon!” said the +gardener. + +“It _would_ be the first time!” returned Clare. “You are very rude.--If +Abdiel understood Scotch, he would bite you,” he added, as the dog, +hearing his master speak angrily, came up, ears erect, and took his +place at his side, ready for combat. + +“Ye’ll hae to tak’ some ither mode o’ payin’ the debt!” said John. +“Stick spaud in yird here, ye sall not! You or I maun flit first!” + +With that he walked slowly away, shouldering his hoe. + +“Come, Abdiel,” said Clare; “we must go and tell Miss Tempest! Perhaps +she’ll find something else for us to do. If she can’t, she’ll forgive +us our breakfast, and we’ll be off on the tramp again. I thought we +were going to have a day’s rest--I mean work; that’s the rest we want! +But this man is an enemy to the poor.” + +The gardener half turned, as if he would speak, but changed his mind +and went his way. + +“Never mind John!” said the cook, loud enough for John to hear. “He’s +an old curmudgeon as can’t sleep o’ nights for quarrellin’ inside +him. I’ll go to mis’ess, and you go and sit down in the kitchen till I +come to you.” + + + + + Chapter LIV. + + THE KITCHEN. + + +Clare went into the kitchen, and sat down. The housemaid came in, and +stood for a moment looking at him. Then she asked him what he wanted +there. + +“Cook told me to wait here,” he answered. + +“Wait for what?” + +“Till she came to me. She’s gone to speak to Miss Tempest.” + +“I won’t have that dog here.” + +“When I had a home,” remarked Clare, “our servant said the cook was +queen of the kitchen: I don’t want to be rude, ma’am, but I must do as +she told me.” + +“She never told you to bring that mangy animal in here!” + +“She knew he would follow me, and she said nothing about him. But he’s +not mangy. He hasn’t enough to eat to be mangy. He’s as lean as a +dried fish!” + +The housemaid, being fat, was inclined to think the remark personal; +but Clare looked up at her with such clear, honest, simple eyes, that +she forgot the notion, and thought what a wonderfully nice boy he +looked. + +“He’s shamefully poor, though! His clothes ain’t even decent!” she +remarked to herself. + +And certainly the white skin did look through in several places. + +“You won’t let him put his nose in anything, will you?” she said quite +gently, returning his smile with a very pleasant one of her own. + +“Abdiel is too much of a gentleman to do it,” he answered. + +“A dog a gentleman!” rejoined the housemaid with a merry laugh, +willing to draw him out. + +“Abdiel can be hungry and not greedy,” answered Clare, and the young +woman was silent. + +Miss Tempest and Mrs. Mereweather had all this time been turning over +the question of what was to be done with the strange boy. They agreed +it was too bad that anyone willing to work should be prevented from +earning even a day’s victuals by the bad temper of a gardener. But +his mistress did not want to send the man away. She had found him +scrupulously honest, as is many a bad-tempered man, and she did not +like changes. The cook on her part had taken such a fancy to Clare that +she did not want him set to garden-work; she would have him at once +into the house, and begin training him for a page. Now Miss Tempest was +greatly desiring the same thing, but in dread of what the cook would +say, and was delighted, therefore, when the first suggestion of it came +from Mrs. Mereweather herself. The only obstacle in the cook’s eyes +was that same long, spectral dog. The boy could not be such a fool, +however,--she said, not being a lover of animals--as let a wretched +beast like that come betwixt him and a good situation! + +“It’s all right, Clare,” said Mrs. Mereweather, entering her queendom +so radiant within that she could not repress the outshine of her +pleasure. “Mis’ess an’ me, we’ve arranged it all. You’re to help me in +the kitchen; an’ if you can do what you’re told, an’ are willin’ to +learn, we’ll soon get you out of your troubles. There’s but one thing +in the way.” + +“What is it, please?” asked Clare. + +“The dog, of course! You must part with the dog.” + +“That I cannot do,” returned Clare quietly, but with countenance +fallen and sorrowful. “--Come, Abdiel!” + +The dog started up, every hair of him full of electric vitality. + +“You don’t mean you’re going to walk yourself off in such a beastly +ungrateful fashion--an’ all for a miserable cur!” exclaimed the cook. + +“The lady has been most kind to us, and we’re grateful to her, and +ready to work for her if she will let us;--ain’t we, Abdiel? But +Abdiel has done far more for me than Miss Tempest! To part with +Abdiel, and leave him to starve, or get into bad company, would be +sheer ingratitude. I should be a creature such as Miss Tempest ought +to have nothing to do with: I might serve her as that young butler I +told her of! It’s just as bad to be ungrateful to a dog as to any +other person. Besides, he wouldn’t leave me. He would be always +hanging about.” + +“John would soon knock him on the head.” + +“Would he, Abdiel?” said Clare. + +The dog looked up in his master’s face with such a comical answer in +his own, that the cook burst out laughing, and began to like Abdiel. + +“But you don’t really mean to say,” she persisted, “that you’d go off +again on the tramp, to be as cold and hungry again to-morrow as you +were yesterday--and all for the sake of a dog? A dog ain’t a +Christian!” + +“Abdiel’s more of a Christian than some I know,” answered Clare: “he +does what his master tells him.” + +“There’s something in that!” said the cook. + +“If I parted with Abdiel, I could never hold up my head among the +angels,” insisted Clare. “Think what harm it might do him! He could +trust nobody after, his goodness might give way! He might grow worse +than Tommy!--No; I’ve got to take care of Abdiel, and Abdiel’s got to +take care of me!--Ain’t you, Abby?” + +“We can’t have him here in the kitchen nohow!” said the cook in +relenting tone. + +“Poor fellow!” said the housemaid kindly. + +The dog turned to her and wagged his tail. + +“What wouldn’t I give for a lover like that!” said the housemaid--but +whether of Clare or the dog I cannot say. + +“I know what I shall do!” cried Clare, in sudden resolve. “I will ask +Miss Tempest to have him up-stairs with her, and when she is tired of +either of us, we will go away together.” + +“A probable thing!” returned the cook. “A lady like Miss Tempest with +a dog like that about her! She’d be eaten up alive with fleas! In ten +minutes she would!” + +“No fear of that!” rejoined Clare. “Abdiel catches all his _own_ +fleas!--Don’t you, Abby?” + +The dog instantly began to burrow in his fell of hair--an answer which +might be taken either of two ways: it might indicate comprehension and +corroboration of his master, or the necessity for a fresh hunt. The +women laughed, much amused. + +“Look here!” said Clare. “Let me have a tub of water--warm, if you +please--he likes that: I tried him once, passing a factory, where a +lot of it was running to waste. Then, with the help of a bit of soap, +I’ll show you a body of hair to astonish you.” + +“What breed is he?” asked the housemaid. + +“He’s all the true breeds under the sun, I fancy,” returned his +master; “but the most of him seems of the sky-blue terrier sort.” + +The more they talked with Clare, the better the women liked him. They +got him a tub and plenty of warm water. Abdiel was nothing loath to be +plunged in, and Clare washed him thoroughly. Taken out and dried, he +seemed no more for a lady’s chamber unmeet. + +“Now,” said Clare, “will you please ask Miss Tempest if I may bring +him on to the lawn, and show her some of his tricks?” + +The good lady was much pleased with the cleverness and instant +obedience of the little animal. Clare proposed that she should keep +him by her. + +“But will he stay with me? and will he do what _I_ tell him?” she +asked. + +Clare took the dog aside, and talked to him. He told him what he was +going to do, and what he expected of him. How much Abdiel understood, +who can tell! but when his master laid him down at Miss Tempest’s +feet, there he lay; and when Clare went with the cook, he did not +move, though he cast many a wistful glance after the lord of his +heart. When his new mistress went into the house, he followed her +submissively, his head hanging, and his tail motionless. He soon +recovered his cheerfulness, however, and seemed to know that his +friend had not abandoned him. + + + + + Chapter LV. + + THE WHEEL RESTS FOR A TIME. + + +That part of the human race which is fond of dolls, may now imagine +the pleasure of the cook in going to the town in the omnibus to buy +everything for a live doll so big as Clare! In a very few days she had +him dressed to her heart’s content, and the satisfaction of her +mistress, who would not have him in livery, but in a plain suit of +dark blue cloth: for she loved blue, all her men-people being, or +having been in the navy. Thus dressed, he looked as much of a +gentleman as before: his look of refinement had owed nothing to the +contrast of his rags. Better clothes make not a few seem commoner. + +When Mrs. Mereweather came back from the town the first day, she found +that the ragged boy had got her kitchen and scullery as nice and +clean, and everything as ready to her hand, as if she had got her work +done before she went, which the omnibus would not permit. This +rejoiced her much; but being a woman of experience, she continued a +little anxious lest his sweet ways should go after his rags, lest his +new garments should breed bumptiousness and bad manners. For such a +change is no unfrequent result of prosperity. But such had been +Mr. Porson’s teaching and example, such Mrs. Porson’s management, and +such the responsiveness of the boy’s disposition, that the thought +never came to him whether this or that was a thing fit for him to do: +if the thing was a right thing, and had to be done, why should not he +do it as well as another! To earn his own and Abdiel’s bread, he would +do anything honest, setting up his back at nothing. But when about a +thing, he forgot even his obligation to do it, in the glad endeavour +to do it well. + +As the days went on, Mrs. Mereweather was not once disappointed in +him. He did everything with such a will that both she and the +housemaid were always ready to spare and help him. Very soon they +began to grow tender over him; and on pretence of his being the +earlier drest to open the door, did certain things themselves which he +had been quite content to do, but which they did not like seeing him +do. Many--I am afraid most boys would have presumed on their +generosity, but Clare was nowise injured by it. + +Nothing could be kinder than the way his mistress treated him. Having +lent him some books, and at once perceived that he was careful of +them, she let him have the run of her library when his day’s work was +over. For he not only read but respected books. Nothing shows +vulgarity more than the way in which some people treat books. No +gentleman would write his remarks on the margins of another person’s +book; no lady would brush her hair as she read one of her own. + +From hungry days and cold nights, Clare and Abdiel found themselves +_in clover_--the phrase surely of some lover of cows!--and they were +more than content. Clare had longed so much for work, and had for so +many a weary day sought it in vain, that he valued it now just because +it was work. And he seemed to know instinctively that a man ranks, not +according to the thing he does, but according to the way he does +it. In life it is far higher to do an inferior thing well than to do a +superior thing passably. + +Clare made good use of his privileges, and read much, educating +himself none the worse that he did it unconsciously. He read whatever +came in his way. He read really--not as most people read, leaving the +sentences behind them like so many unbroken nuts, the kernel of whose +meaning they have not seen. He learned more than most boys at school, +more even than most young men at college; for it is not what one +knows, but what one uses, that is the true measure of learning. +Whatever he read, he read from the point of practice. In history or +romance he saw--not merely what a man ought to be or do, but what he +himself must, at that moment, be or do. There is a very common sort of +man calling himself practical, but neglecting to practise the most +important things, who would laugh at the idea of Clare being +practical, seeing he did not trouble his head about money, or “getting +on in the world”--what servants call “bettering themselves;” but such +a practical man will find he has been but a practical fool. Clare took +heed to do what was right, and grow a better man. Such a life is the +only really practical one. + +People wondered how Miss Tempest had managed to get hold of such a +nice-looking page, and the good lady was flattered by their +wonder. But she knew the world too well to be sure of him yet. She +knew that it is difficult, in the human tree, to distinguish between +blossom and fruit. Deeds of lovely impulse are the blossom; unvarying, +determined Tightness is the fruit. + + + + + Chapter LVI. + + STRATEGY. + + +Miss Tempest was the last of an old family, with scarce a relation, +and no near one, in the world. Hence the pieces of personal property +that had continued in the possession of various branches of the family +after land and money, through fault or misfortune, were gone, had +mostly drifted into the small pool of Miss Tempest’s life now slowly +sinking in the sands of time, there to gleam and sparkle out their +tale of its old splendour. She did not think often of their +money-worth: had she done so, she would have kept them at her +banker’s; but she valued them greatly both for their beauty and their +associations, constantly using as many of them as she could. More than +one of her friends had repeatedly tried to persuade her that it was +not prudent to have so much plate and so many jewels in the house, for +the fact was sure to be known where it was least desirable it should: +she always said she would think about it. At times she would for a +moment contemplate sending her valuables to the bank; but her next +thought--by no means an unwise one--would always be, “Of what use will +they be at the bank? I might as well not have them at all! Better sell +them and do some good with the money!--No; I must have them about me!” + +There are predatory persons in every large town, who either know or +are learning to know the houses in it worth the risk of robbing. When +it falls to the lot of this or that house to be attempted, one of the +gang will make the acquaintance of some servant in it, with the object +of discovering beforehand where its treasure lies, and so reducing the +time to be spent in it, and the risk of frustration or capture. Often +they seduce one of the household to let them in, or hand out the +things they want. Any such gang, however, must soon have become +convinced that at Miss Tempest’s, corruption was impossible, and that +they could avail themselves solely of their own internal resources. + +It was well now for Miss Tempest that she was so faithful herself as +to encourage faithfulness in others: gladly would she have had Abdiel +sleep in her room, but she would not take the pleasure of his company +from his old master and companion in suffering. The dog therefore +slept on Clare’s bed, just as he did when the bed was as hard to +define as to lie upon, only now he had to take the part neither of +blanket nor hot bottle. + +One night, about half-past twelve, watchful even in slumber, he sprang +up in his lair at his master’s feet, listened a moment, gave a low +growl, again listened, and gave another growl. Clare woke, and found +his bed trembling with the tremor of his little four-footed +guardian. Telling him to keep quiet, he rose on his elbow, and in his +turn listened, but could hear nothing. He thought then he would light +his candle and go down, but concluded it wiser to descend without a +light, and listen under cloak of the darkness. If he could but save +Miss Tempest from a fright! He crept out of bed, and went first to the +window--a small one in the narrowing of the gable-wall of his attic +room: the night was warm, and, loving the night air, he had it +open. Hearkening there for a moment, he thought he heard a slight +movement below. Very softly he put out his head, and looked +down. There was no moon, but in the momentary flash of a lantern he +caught sight of a small pair of legs disappearing inside the scullery +window, which was almost under his own. Swift and noiseless he hurried +down, and reached the scullery door just in time for a little fellow +who came stealing out of it, to run against him. + +Now Clare had heard the housemaid read enough from the newspapers to +guess, the moment he looked from the garret window, that the legs he +saw were those of a boy sent in to open a door or window, and when the +boy, feeling his way in the dark, came against him, he gripped him by +the throat with the squeeze that used to silence Tommy. The prowler +knew the squeeze. The moment Clare relaxed it, in a piping whisper +came the words, + +“Clare! Clare! they said they’d kill me if I didn’t!” + +“Didn’t what?” + +“Open the door to them.” + +“If you utter one whimper, I’ll throttle you,” said Clare. + +He tightened his grasp for an instant, and Tommy, who had not +forgotten that what Clare said, he did, immediately gave in, and was +led away. Clare took him in his arms and carried him to his room, tied +him hand and foot, and left him on the floor, fast to the bedstead. +Then he crept swiftly to the servants’ room, and with some difficulty +waking them, told them what he had done, and asked them to help him. + +Both women of sense and courage, they undertook at once to do their +part. But when he proposed that they should open a window, as if it +were done by Tommy, and so enticing the burglars to enter, secure the +first of them, they, naturally enough, and wisely too, declined to +encounter the risk. + +The burglars, perplexed by the lack of any sign from Tommy yet the +utter quiet of the house, concluded probably that he had fallen +somewhere, and was lying either insensible, or unable to move and +afraid to cry out--in which case they would be at the mercy of what he +might say when he was found. + +Those within could hear as little noise without. They went from door +to window, wherever an attempt might be made, but all was still. Then +it occurred to Clare that he had left the scullery window +unwatched. He hastened to it--and was but just in time: two long thin +legs were sticking through, and showed by their movements that +considerable effort was being made by the body that belonged to them, +to enter after them. Legs first was the wrong way, but the youth +feared the unknown fate of Tommy, and being pig-headed, would go that +way or not at all. + +A boy in courage equal to Clare, but of less coolness, would at once +have made war on the intrusive legs; but Clare bethought him that, so +long as that body filled the window, no other body could pass that +way; so it would be well to keep it there, a cork to the house, making +it like the nest of a trap-door-spider. He begged the women, +therefore, who had followed him, to lay hold each of an ankle, and +stick to it like a clamp, while he ran to get some string. + +The women, entering heartily into the business, held on bravely. The +owner of the legs made vigorous efforts to release them, more anxious +a good deal to get out than he had been to get in, but he was not very +strong, and had no scope. His accomplices laid hold of him and pulled; +then, with good mother-wit, the women pulled away from each other, and +so made of his legs a wedge. + +Clare came back with a piece of clothes-line, one end of which he +slipped with a running knot round one ankle, and the other in like +fashion round the other. Then he cut the line in halves, and drawing +them over two hooks in the ceiling, some distance apart, so that the +legs continued widespread like a V upside down, hauled the feet up as +high as he could, and fastened the ends of the lines. Hold lines and +hooks, it was now impossible to draw the fellow out. + +Leaving the women to watch, and telling them to keep a hand on each of +the lines because the scullery was pitch-dark, he went next to his +room and looked again from the window. He feared they might be trying +to get in at some other place, for they would not readily abandon +their accomplices, and doubtless knew what a small household it was! +He would see first, therefore, what was doing outside the scullery, +and then make a round of doors and windows! + +Right under him when he looked out, stood a short, burly figure; +another man was taking intermittent hauls at the arms of their +leg-tied companion, regardless of his stifled cries of pain when he +did so. Clare went and fetched his water-jug, which was half full, and +leaning out once more, with the jug upright in his two hands, moved it +this way and that until he had it, as nearly as he could determine, +just over the man beneath him, and then dropped it. The jug fell +plumb, and might have killed the man but that he bent his head at the +moment, and received it between his shoulders. It knocked the breath +out of him, and he lay motionless. The other man fled. The +window-stopper, hearing the crash of the jug, wrenched and kicked and +struggled, but in vain. There he had to wait the sunrise, for not a +moment sooner would the cook open the door. + +When they went out at last, the stout man too was gone. He had risen +and staggered into the shrubbery, and there fallen, but had risen once +more and got away. + +Their captive pretended to be all but dead, thinking to move their +pity and be set free. But Clare went to the next house and got the +man-servant there to go for the police, begging him to make haste: he +knew that his tender-hearted mistress, if she came down before the +police arrived, would certainly let the fellow go, and Tommy with him; +and he was determined the law should have its way if he could compass +it. What hope was there for the wretched Tommy if he was allowed to +escape! And what right had they to let such people loose on their +neighbours! It was selfishness to indulge one’s own pity to the danger +of others! He would be his brother’s keeper by holding on to his +brother’s enemy! + +Going at last to his room, he found Tommy asleep. The boy was better +dressed, but no cleaner than when first he knew him. Clare proceeded +to wash and dress. Tommy woke, and lay staring, but did not utter a +sound. + +“Have your sleep out,” said Clare. “The police won’t be here, I +daresay, for an hour yet.” + +“I believe you!” returned Tommy, as impudent as ever. His +contemplation of Clare had revived his old contempt for him. “I mean +to go. I ain’t done nothing.” + +“Go, then,” said Clare, and took no more heed of him. + +“If it’s manners you want, Clare,” resumed Tommy, “_please_ let me +go!” + +Clare turned and looked at him. The evil expression was hardened on +his countenance. He gave him no answer. + +“You ain’t never agoin’ to turn agin an old pal, aire you?” said +Tommy. + +“I ain’t a pal of yours, Tommy, or of any other thief’s!” answered +Clare. + +“I’ll take my oath on it to the beak!” + +“You’ll soon have the chance; I’ve sent for the police.” Tommy changed +his tone. + +“Please, Clare, let me go,” he whined. + +“I will not. I did what I could for you before, and I’ll do what I can +for you now. You must go with the police.” + +Tommy began to blubber, or pretend--Clare could not tell which. + +“This beastly string’s a cuttin’ into me!” he sobbed. + +Clare examined it, and found it easy enough. + +“I won’t undo one knot,” he answered, “until there’s a policeman in +the room. If you make a noise, I will stuff your mouth.” + +His dread was that his mistress might hear, and spoil all. “It’s her +house,” he said to himself, “but they’re my captives!” + +Tommy lay still, and the police came. + +When they untied and drew out the cork of the scullery window, Clare +thought he had seen him before, but could not remember where. One of +the policemen, however, the moment his eyes fell on his face, cried +out joyfully, + +“Ah, ha, my beauty! I’ve been a lookin’ for you!” + +“Never set eyes on ye afore,” growled the fellow. + +“Don’t ye say now ye ain’t a dear friend o’ mine,” insisted the +policeman, “when I carry yer pictur’ in my bosom!” + +He drew out a pocket-book, and from it a photograph, at which he gazed +with satisfaction, comparing it with the face before him. In another +moment Clare recognized the lad sent by Maidstone to exchange +band-boxes with him. + +“Her majesty the queen wants you for that robbery, you know!” said the +policeman. + +A boy who loved romance and generosity more than truth and +righteousness, would now have regretted the chance he had lost of +doing a fine action, and sought yet to set the rascal free. There are +men who cheat and make presents; there are men who are saints abroad +and churls at home, as Bunyan says; there are men who screw down the +wages of their clerks and leave vast sums to the poor; men who build +churches with the proceeds of drunkenness; men who promote bubble +companies and have prayers in their families morning and evening; men, +in a word, who can be very generous with what is not their own; for +nothing ill-gotten is a man’s own any more than the money in a thief’s +pocket: Clare was not of the contemptible order of the falsely +generous. + +Profiting, doubtless, by Maidstone’s own example, the fellow had, as +Clare now learned, run away from his master, carrying with him the +contents of the till: whether he deserved punishment more than his +master, may be left undiscussed. + +When first Miss Tempest’s friends heard of the attempt to break into +her house, they said--what could she expect if she took tramps into +her service! They were considerably astonished, however, when they +read in the newspaper the terms in which the magistrate had spoken of +the admirable courage and contrivance of Miss Tempest’s page, and the +resolution with which the women of her household had seconded him. If +every third house were as well defended, he said, the crime of +burglary would disappear. + +After the trial, Clare begged and was granted an interview with the +magistrate. He told him what he knew about Tommy, and entreated he +might be sent to some reformatory, to be kept from bad company until +he was able to distinguish between right and wrong, which he thought +he hardly could at present. The magistrate promised it should be done, +and with kind words dismissed him. + +Things returned to their old way at Miss Tempest’s. Her friends never +doubted she would now at last commit her plate to her banker’s strong +room, but they found themselves mistaken: she was convinced that, with +such servants and Abdiel, it was safe where it was. + +The leader of the gang, injured by Clare’s water-jug, was soon after +captured, and the gang was broken up. + + + + + Chapter LVII. + + ANN SHOTOVER. + + +So void of self-assertion was Clare, so prompt at the call of whoever +needed him, so quiet yet so quick, so silent in his sympathetic +ministrations, so studious and so capable, that, after two years, Miss +Tempest began to feel she ought to do what she could to “advance his +prospects,” even at the loss to herself of his services. + +He never came to regard Miss Tempest as he did the other women who had +saved him: he never thought of her as his fourth mother. Truly good +and kind she was, but she had a certain manner which prevented him +from feeling entirely comfortable with her. It did not escape him, +however, that Abdiel was thoroughly at his ease in her company; and he +believed therefore that the dog knew her better, or at least was more +just to her, than he. + +The fact was Miss Tempest kept down all her feelings, with a vague +sense that to show them would be to waste her substance: it was the +one shape that the yet lingering selfishness of a very unselfish +person took. Thus she kept him at a distance, and he stayed at a +distance, she on her part wondering that he did not open out to her +more, but neither doubting that all was right between them. Nothing, +indeed, was wrong--only they might have come a little nearer. Perhaps, +also, Miss Tempest was a little too conscious of being his patroness, +his earthly saviour. + +It was natural that, after the defeated robbery, Clare should become a +little known to the friends of the mistress he had so well served; +when, therefore, Miss Tempest spoke to her banker concerning the +ability of her page, mentioning that, in his spare time, he had been +reading hard, as well as attending an evening-school for mathematics, +where he gained much approbation from his master, she spoke of one +already known by him to one accustomed to regard character. + +The banker listened with a solemn listening from which she could not +tell what he was thinking. No one ever could tell what Mr. Shotover +was thinking: his face was not half a face; it was more a mask than a +face. High in the world’s regard, rich, and of unquestioned integrity, +he was believed to have gathered a large fortune; but he kept his +affairs to himself. That he liked his own way so much as never to +yield it, I give up to the admiration of such as himself: often +kind--when the required mode of the kindness pleased him, a constant +church-goer and giver of money, always saying less the more he made up +his mind, he had generally no trouble in getting it. + +Priding himself on his moral discrimination, he had, now and then, as +suited his need, taken from a lower position a young man he thought +would serve his purpose, and modelled him to it. He had had his eye on +Clare ever since reading the magistrate’s eulogy of his contrivance +and courage; but when Miss Tempest spoke, he had not made up his mind +about him, for something in the boy repelled him. He had scarcely +troubled himself to ask what it was, nor do I believe he could have +discovered, for the root of the repulsion lay in himself. + +Moved in part, however, by the representations of Miss Tempest, in +part also, I think, by a desire to discover that the boy was a +hypocrite, Mr. Shotover consented to give him a trial, whereupon Miss +Tempest made haste to disclose to her _protegé_ the grand thing she +had done for him. + +She was disappointed at the coolness and lack of interest with which +Clare heard her great news. She could not but be gratified that he did +not want to leave her, but she was annoyed that he seemed unaware of +any advantage to be gained in doing so--high as the social ascent from +servitude to clerkship would by most be considered. But Clare’s +horizon was not that of the world. He had no inclination to more of +figures and less of persons. Miss Tempest, however, insisting that she +knew what was best for him, and what it was therefore his duty to do, +he listened in respectful silence to all she had to say. But what she +counted her most powerful argument--that he owed it to himself to rise +in the world--did not even touch him, did not move the slightest +response in a mind nobly devoid of ambition. Her argument was in truth +nonsense; for a man owes himself nothing, owes God everything, and +owes his neighbour whatever his own conscience goes on to require of +him for his neighbour. Feeling at the same time, however, that she had +a huge claim on his compliance with her wishes, Clare consented to +leave her kitchen for her friend’s bank, where he had of course to +take the lowest position, one counted by the rest of the clerks, +especially the one just out of it, _menial_, requiring him to be in +the bank earlier by half an hour than the others, to be the last to go +away at night, and to sleep in the house--where a not uncomfortable +room in the attic story was appointed him. + +Mr. Shotover himself lived above the bank--with his family, consisting +of his wife and two daughters. Mrs. Shotover suffered from a terrible +disease--that of thinking herself ill when nothing was the matter with +her except her paramount interest in herself--the source of at least +half the incurable disease among idle people. The elder daughter was a +high-spirited girl about twenty, with a frank, friendly manner, +indicating what God meant her to be, not what she was, or had yet +chosen to be. She was not really frank, and seemed far more friendly +than she was, being more selfish than she knew, and far more selfish +than she seemed: she was merry, and that goes a great way in +seeming. Her mother spent no regard upon her; her heart was too full +of herself to have in it room for a grown-up daughter as well, with +interests of her own. The younger was a child about six, of whom the +mother took not so much care by half as a tigress of her cub. + +One morning, a little before eight o’clock, as Clare was coming down +from his room to open the windows of the bank, he just saved himself +from tumbling over something on the attic stair, which was dark, and +at that point took rather a sharp turn. The something was a child, who +gave a low cry, and started up to run away: there was not light enough +for either to discern easily what the other was like. But Clare, to +whom childhood was the strongest attraction he yet knew, bent down his +face from where he stood on the step above her, and its moonlight glow +of love and faith shone clear in the eyes of the little girl. The +moment she saw his smile, she knew the soul that was the light of the +smile, and her doll dropped from her hands as she raised them to lay +her arms gently about his neck. + +“Oh!” she said, “you’re come!” + +He saw now, in the dusk, a pale, ordinary little face, with rather +large gray eyes, a rather characterless, tiny, up-turned nose, and a +rather pretty mouth. + +“Yes, little one. Were you expecting me?” he returned, with his arms +about her. + +“Yes,” she answered, in the tone of one stating what the other must +know. + +“How was it I frightened you, then?” + +“Only at first I thought you was an ogre! That was before I saw +you. Then I knew!” + +“Who told you I was coming?” + +“Nobody. Nobody knew you was coming but me. I’ve known it--oh, for +such a time!--ever since I was born, I think!” + +She turned her head a little and looked down where the doll lay a step +or two below. + +“You can go now, dolly,” she said. “I don’t want you any more.” Here +she paused a while, as if listening to a reply, then went on: “I am +much obliged to you, dolly; but what am I to do with you? You won’t +never speak! It has made me quite sad many a time, you know very well! +But you can’t help it! So go away, please, and be nobody, for you +never would be anybody! I did my best to get you to be somebody, but +you wouldn’t! Thank you all the same! I will take you and put you +where you can be as dull as you please, and nobody will mind.”--Here +she left Clare, went down, and lifted her plaything.--“Dolly, dolly,” +she resumed, “he’s come! I knew he would! And you don’t know it +because you’re nobody!” + +Without looking back, or a word of adieu to Clare, she went slowly +down the steps, one by one, with the doll in her arms, manifesting for +it neither contempt nor tenderness. Many a child would have carried +the discrowned favourite by one leg; she carried her in both hands. + +Clare waited a while on the narrow, closed-in, wooden stair, not a +little wondering, and full of thought. His wonder, however, had no +puzzlement in it. The child’s behaviour involved no difficulty. The +two existences came together, and each understood the other in virtue +of its essential nature. In after years Clare could put the thing into +such words; he sought none at the time. The child was lonely. She had +done her best with her doll, but it had failed her. It was not +companionable. The moment she looked in Clare’s face, she knew that he +loved her, and that she had been waiting for _him_! She was not +surprised to see him; how should it be otherwise than just so! He was +come: good bye, dolly! The child had imagination--next to conscience +the strongest ally of common sense. She knew, like St. Paul, that an +idol is nothing. As men and women grow in imagination and common +sense, more and more will sacred silly dolls be cast to the moles and +the bats. But pretty Fancy and limping Logic are powerful usurpers in +commonplace minds. + +Clare saw nothing more of her that day, neither tried to see her; but +he did his work in an atmosphere of roses. The work was not nearly so +interesting as house-work, but Clare was an honest gentleman, +therefore did it well: that it was not interesting was of no account; +it was his work! But to know that a child was in the house, not merely +a child for him to love, but a child that already loved him so that he +could be her servant indeed, changed the stupid bank almost into the +dome of the angels. + +His fellow clerks took little notice of him beyond what, in the +routine of the day, was unavoidable. He had been a page-boy: the less +they did with him the better! Were they not wronged by his +introduction into their company? The poorest creature of them believed +he would have served out the burglars better if the chance had been +his. + + + + + Chapter LVIII. + + CHILD-TALK. + + +As Clare came down the next morning but one, there was the child again +on the dark narrow stair. She had no doll. Her hands lay folded in her +lap. She sat on the same step, the very image of child-patience. As he +approached she did not move. I believe she held solemn revel of +expectation. He laid his hand on the whitey-brown hair smoothed flat +on her head with a brush dipped in water. Not much dressing was wasted +on Ann--common little name! + +She rose, turned to him, and again laid her arms about his neck. No +kiss followed: she had not been taught to kiss. + +“Where’s dolly?” asked Clare. + +“Nowhere. Buried,” answered the child. + +“Where did you bury her? In the garden?” + +“No. The garden wouldn’t be nowhere!” + +“Where, then?” + +“Nowhere. I threw her out of the window.” + +“Into the street?” + +“Yes. She did fell on a horse’s back, and he jumped. I was sorry.” + +“It didn’t hurt him. I hope it didn’t hurt dolly!” + +The moment he said it, Clare’s heart reproached him: he was not +talking true! he was not talking out of his real heart to the child! +Almost with indignation she answered:-- + +“_Things_ don’t be hurt! Dolly was a thing! She’s _no_ thing now!” + +“Why?” + +“Because she fell under the horse, and was seen no more.” + +“Is she old enough,” thought Clare, “to read the Pilgrim’s Progress?” + +“Will you tell me, please,” he said, “_when_ a thing is only a thing?” + +“When it won’t mind what you do or say to it.” + +“And when is a thing no thing any more?” + +“When you never think of it again.” + +“Is a fly a thing?” + +“I _could_ make a fly mind, only it would hurt it!” + +“Of course we wouldn’t do that!” + +“No; we don’t want to make a fly mind. It’s not one of our creatures.” + +Clare thought that was far enough in metaphysics for one morning. + +“I waited for you yesterday,” he said, “but you didn’t come!” + +“Dolly didn’t like to be buried. I mean, I didn’t like burying +dolly. I cried and wouldn’t come.” + +“Then why did you bury dolly?” + +“She _had_ to be buried. I told you she couldn’t _be_ anybody! So I +_made_ her be buried.” + +“I see! I quite understand.--But what have you to amuse yourself with +now?” + +“I don’t want to be mused now. You’s come! I’m growed up!” + +“Yes, of course!” answered Clare; but he was puzzled what to say next. + +What could he do for her? Glad would he have been to take her down to +the sea, or to the docks, or into the country somewhere, till +dinner-time, and then after dinner take her out again! But there was +his work--ugly, stupid work that had to be done, as dolly _had_ to be +buried! Alas for the child who has discarded her toys, and is suddenly +growed up! What is she to do with herself? Clare’s coming had caused +the loss of Ann’s former interests: he felt bound to make up to her +for that loss. But how? It was a serious question, and not being his +own master, he could not in a moment answer it. + +“I wish I could stay with you all day!” he said. “But your papa wants +me in the bank. I must go.” + +Clare had not had a good sight of the child, and was at a loss to +think what must be her age. Her language, both in form and utterance, +was partly precise and _grown-up_, and partly childish; but her wisdom +was child-like--and that is the opposite both of precise and +childish. It was the wisdom that comes of unity between thought and +action. + +“Is there anything I can do for you before I go?--for I must go,” said +Clare. + +“Who says _must_ to you? Nurse says _must_ to me.” + +“Your papa says _must_ to me.” + +“If you didn’t say _yes_ when papa said _must_, what would come next?” + +“He would say, ‘Go out of my house, and never come in again.’” + +“And would you do it?” + +“I must: the house is his, not mine.” + +“If I didn’t say _yes_ when papa said _must_, what would happen?” + +“He would try to make you say it.” + +“And if I wouldn’t, would he say, ‘Go out of my house and never come +in again’?” + +“No; you are his little girl!” + +“Then I think he shouldn’t say it to you.--What is your name?” + +“Clare.” + +“Then, Clare, if my papa sends you out of his house, I will go with +you.--You wouldn’t turn me out, would you, when I was a _little_ +naughty?” + +“No; neither would your papa.” + +“If he turned you out, it would be all the same. Where you go, I will +go. I must, you know! Would you mind if he said, ‘Go away’?” + +“I should be very sorry to leave you.” + +“Yes, but that’s not going to be! Why do you stay with papa? Were you +in the house always--ever so long before I saw you?” + +“No; a very little while only.” + +“Did you come in from the street?” + +“Yes; I came in from the street. Your papa pays me to work for him.” + +“And if you wouldn’t?” + +“Then I should have no money, and nothing to eat, and nowhere to sleep +at night.” + +“Would that make you uncomfable?” + +“It would make me die.” + +“Have you a papa?” + +“Yes, but he’s far away.” + +“You could go to him, couldn’t you?” + +“One day I shall.” + +“Why don’t you go now, and take me?” + +“Because he died.” + +“What’s _died_?” + +“Went away out of sight, where we can’t go to look for him till we go +out of sight too.” + +“When will that be?” + +“I don’t know.” + +“Does anybody know?” + +“Nobody.” + +“Then perhaps you will never go?” + +“We must go; it’s only that nobody knows when.” + +“I think the when that nobody knows, mayn’t never come.--Is that why +you have to work?” + +“Everybody has to work one way or another.” + +“I haven’t to work!” + +“If you don’t work when you’re old enough, you’ll be miserable.” + +“_You’re_ not old enough.” + +“Oh, yes, indeed I am! I’ve been working a long time now.” + +“Where? Not for papa?” + +“No; not for papa.” + +“Why not? Why didn’t you come sooner? Why didn’t you come _much_ +sooner--_ever_ so much sooner? Why did you make me wait for you all +the time?” + +“Nobody ever told me you were waiting.” + +“Nobody ever told me you were coming, but I knew.” + +“You had to wait for me, and you knew. I had to wait for you, and I +didn’t know! When we have time, I will tell you all about myself, and +how I’ve been waiting too.” + +“Waiting for me?” + +“No.” + +“Who for?” + +“For my father and mother--and somebody else, I think.” + +“That’s me.” + +“No; I’m waiting yet. I didn’t know I was coming to you till I came, +and there you were!” + +The child was silent for a moment. Then she said thoughtfully, + +“You will tell me _all_ about yourself! That _will_ be nice!--Can you +tell stories?” she added. “--Of course you can! You can do +_every_thing!” + +“Oh, no, I can’t!” + +“Can’t you?” + +“No; I can do _some_ things--not many. I can love you, little +one!--Now I must go, or I shall be late, and nobody ever ought to be +late.” + +“Go then. I will go to my nursery and wait again.” + +She went down the stair without once looking behind her. Clare +followed. On the next floor she went one way to her nursery, and he +another to the back-stairs. + +One of the causes and signs of Clare’s manliness was, that he never +aimed at being a man. Many men continue childish because they are +always trying to act like men, instead of simply trying to do +right. Such never develop true manliness; Clare’s manhood stole upon +him unawares. That which at once made him a man and kept him a child, +was, that he had no regard for anything but what was real, that is, +true. + +All the day the thought kept coming, what could he do for the little +girl? Perhaps what stirred his feeling for her most, was a suspicion +that she was neglected. But the careless treatment of a nurse was +better for her than would have been the capricious blandishments and +neglects of a mother like Mrs. Shotover. Clare, however, knew nothing +yet about Ann’s mother. He knew only, by the solemnly still ways of +the child, that she must be much left to her own resources, and was +wonderfully developed in consequence--whether healthily or not, he +could not yet tell. The practical question was--how to contrive to be +her occasional companion; how to offer to serve her. + +After much thinking, he concluded that he must wait: opportunity might +suggest mode; and he would rather find than make opportunity! + + + + + Chapter LIX. + + LOVERS’ WALKS. + + +He had not long to wait. That very afternoon, going a message for the +head-clerk, he met Ann walking with a young lady--who must be Miss +Shotover. Neither sister seemed happy with the other. Ann was very +white, and so tired that she could but drag her little feet after +her. Miss Shotover, flushed with exertion, and annoyed with her part +of nursemaid, held her tight and hauled her along by the hand. She +looked good-natured, but not one of the ministering sort. Every now +and then she would give the little arm a pull, and say, though not +_very_ crossly, “Do come along!” The child did not cry, but it was +plain she suffered. It was plain also she was doing her best to get +home, and avoid rousing her sister’s tug. + +Keen-sighted, Clare had recognized Ann at some distance, and as he +approached had a better opportunity than on the dark stair of seeing +what his little friend was like. He saw that her eyes were unusually +clear, and, paces away, could distinguish the blue veins on her +forehead: she looked even more delicate than he had thought her. The +lines of her mouth were straightened out with the painful effort she +had to make to keep up with her sister. Her nose continued +insignificant, waiting to learn what was expected of it. + +For Miss Shotover, there was not a good feature in her face, and even +to a casual glance it might have suggested a measure of meanness. But +a bright complexion, and the youthful charm which vanishes with youth, +are pleasant in their season. Her figure was lithe, and in general she +had a look of fun; but at the moment heat and impatience clouded her +countenance. + +Clare stopped and lifted his hat. Then first the dazed child saw him, +for she was short-sighted, and her observation was dulled by +weariness. She said not a word, uttered no sound, only drew her hand +from her sister’s, and held up her arms to her friend--in dumb prayer +to be lifted above the thorns of life, and borne along without pain. +He caught her up. + +“I beg your pardon, ma’am,” he said, “but the little one and I have +met before:--I live in the house, having the honour to be the youngest +of your father’s clerks. If you will allow me, I will carry the +child. She looks tired!” + +[Illustration: CLARE ASKS MISS SHOTOVER TO LET HIM CARRY ANN HOME.] + +Miss Shotover was glad enough to be relieved of her clog, and gave +smiling consent. + +“If you would be so kind as to carry her home,” she said, “I should be +able to do a little shopping!” + +“You will not mind my taking her a little farther first, ma’am? I am +on a message for Mr. Woolrige. I will carry her all the way, and be +very careful of her.” + +Miss Shotover was not one to cherish anxiety. She already knew Clare +both by report and by sight, and willingly yielded. Saying, with one +of her pleasant smiles, that she would hold him accountable for her, +she sailed away, like a sloop that had been dragging her anchor, but +had now cut her cable. Clare thought what a sweet-looking girl she +was--and in truth she was sweet-_looking_. Then, all his heart turned +to the little one in his arms. + +What a walk was that for both of them! Little Ann seemed never to have +lived before: she was actually happy! She had been long waiting for +Clare, and he was come--and such as she had expected him! It was bliss +to glide thus along the busy street without the least exertion, +looking down on the heads of the people, safe above danger and fear +amid swift-moving things and the crowding confusions of life! To be in +Clare’s arms was better than being in the little house on the +elephant’s back in her best picture-book! True, little one! To be in +the arms of love, be they ever so weak, is better than to ride the +grandest horse in all the stables of God--and God would have you know +it! Never mind your pale little face and your puny nose! While your +heart is ready to die for love-sake, you are blessed among women! +Only remember that to die of disappointment is not to die either of or +for love! + +And to Clare, after all those days upon days during which only a dog +would come to his arms, what a glory of life it was to have a human +child in them, the little heart of the pale face beating against his +side! He was not going to forget Abdiel. Abdiel was not a fact to be +forgotten. Abdiel was not a doll, Abdiel was not a thing that would +not come alive. Abdiel was a true heart, a live soul, and Clare would +love him for ever!--not an atom the less that now he had one out upon +whom a larger love was able to flow! All true love makes abler to +love. It is only false love, the love of those who take their own +meanest selfishness, their own pleasure in being loved, for love, that +shrinks and narrows the soul. + +To the pale-faced, listening child, Clare talked much about the +wonderful Abdiel, and about the kind good Miss Tempest who was keeping +him to live again at length with his old master; and Ann loved the dog +she had never seen, because the dog loved the Clare who was come at +last. + +When they returned, Clare rang the house-bell, and gave up his charge +to the man who opened the door. Without word or tone, gesture or look +of objection, or even of disinclination, the child submitted to be +taken from Clare’s loving embrace, and carried to a nurse who was +neither glad nor sorry to see her. + +He had been so long gone that Mr. Woolrige found fault with him for +it. Clare told him he had met Miss Shotover with her sister, and the +child seemed so tired he had asked leave to carry her with him, +Mr. Woolrige was not pleased, but he said nothing; on the spot the +clerks nicknamed him _Nursie_; and Clare did his best to justify the +appellation--he never lost a chance of acting up to it, and always +answered when they summoned him by it. + +Before the week was ended, he sought an interview with Miss Shotover, +and asked her whether he might not take little Ann out for a walk +whenever the evening was fine. For at five o’clock the doors of the +bank were shut, and in half an hour after he was free. Miss Shotover +said she saw no objection, and would tell the nurse to have her ready +as often as the weather was fit; whereupon Clare left her with a +gratitude far beyond any degree of that emotion by her conceivable. +The nurse, on her part, was willing to gratify Clare, and not sorry to +be rid of the child, who was not one, indeed, to interest any ordinary +woman. + +The summer came and was peculiarly fine, and almost every evening +Clare might be seen taking his pleasure--neither like bank-clerk nor +like nurse-maid, for always he had little Ann in his arms, or was +leading her along with care and entire attention: he never let her +walk except on entreaty, and not always then. To his fellow clerks +this proof of an utter lack of dignity seemed consistent with his +origin--of which they knew nothing; they knew only his late +position. To themselves they were fine gentlemen with cigars in their +mouths, and he was a lackey to the bone! To himself Clare was the +lover of a child; and about them he did not think. Theirs was the life +of a town; Clare’s was a life of the universe. + +The pair came speedily to understand and communicate like twin brother +and sister. Clare, as he carried her, always knew when Ann wanted a +change of position; Ann always knew when Clare began to grow +weary--knew before Clare himself--and would insist on walking. +Neither could remember how it came, but it grew a custom that, when +they walked hand in hand, Clare told her stories of his life and +adventures; when he carried her, he told her fairy-tales, which he +could spin like a spider: she preferred the former. + +So neither bank nor nursery was any longer dreary. + +At length came the gray, brooding winter, causing red fingers and +aches and chilblains. But it was not unfriendly to little Ann. True, +she was not permitted to go out in the evening any more, but Clare, +with the help of the cook, devoted to her his dinner-hour instead. It +was no hardship to eat from a basket in place of a table, to one who +never troubled himself as to the kind, quality, or quantity of his +food itself. He had learned, like a good soldier, to endure +hardness. I have heard him say that never did he enjoy a dinner more +than when, in those homeless days of his boyhood, he tore the flakes +off a loaf fresh from the baker’s oven, and ate them as he walked +along the street. The old highlanders of Scotland were trained to +think it the part of a gentleman not to mind what he ate--sign of +scant civilization, no doubt, in the eyes of some who now occupy but +do not fill their place--as time will show, when the call is for men +to fight, not to eat. + + + + + Chapter LX. + + THE SHOE-BLACK. + + +The head-clerk, while he had not a word against him, as he confessed +to Mr. Shotover, yet thought Clare would never make a man of +business. When pressed to say on what he grounded the opinion, he +could only answer that the lad did not seem to have his heart in it. +But if, to be a man of business, it is not enough to do one’s duty +scrupulously, but the very heart must be in it, then is there +something wrong with business. The heart fares as its treasure: who +would be content his heart should fare as not a few sorts of treasure +must? Mr. Woolrige passed no such judgment, however, upon certain +older young men in the bank, whose hearts certainly were not in the +business, but even worse posited. + +One cold, miserable day, at once damp and frosty, on which it was +quite unfit to take Ann out, Clare, having eaten a hasty dinner, and +followed it with a walk, was returning through the town in good time +for the recommencement of business, when he came upon a little boy, at +the corner of a street, blowing his fingers, and stumping up and down +the pavement to keep his blood moving while he waited for a job: his +brushes lay on the top of his blacking-box on the curbstone. Clare saw +that he was both hungry and cold--states of sensation with which he +was far too familiar to look on the signs of them with indifference. +To give him something to do, and so something to eat, he went to his +block and put his foot on it. The boy bustled up, snatched at his +brushes, and began operations. But, whether from the coldness or +incapacity of his hands, Clare soon saw that his boots would not be +polished that afternoon. + +“You don’t seem quite up to your business, my boy!” he said. “What’s +the matter?” + +The boy made no answer, but went on with his vain attempt. A moment +more, and Clare saw a tear fall on the boot he was at work upon. + +“This won’t do!” said Clare. “Let me look at _your_ boots.” + +The boy stood up, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. + +“Ah!” said Clare, “I don’t wonder you can’t polish my boots, when you +don’t care to polish your own!” + +“Please, sir,” answered the boy, “it’s Jim as does it! He’s down wi’ +the measles, an’ I ain’t up to it.” + +“Look here, then! I’ll give you a lesson,” said Clare. “Many’s the +boot I’ve blacked. Up with your foot! I’ll soon show you how the +thing’s done!” + +“Please, sir,” objected the boy, “there ain’t enough boot left to take +a polish!” + +“We’ll see about that!” returned Clare. “Put it up. I’ve worn worse in +my time.” + +The boy obeyed. The boot was very bad, but there was enough leather to +carry some blacking, and the skin took the rest. + +[Illustration: CLARE IS FOUND GIVING THE SHOE-BLACK A LESSON.] + +Clare was working away, growing pleasantly hot with the quick, sharp +motion, while two of his fellow clerks were strolling up on the other +side of the corner, who had been having more with their lunch than was +good for them. Swinging round, they came upon a well dressed youth +brushing a ragged boy’s boots. It was an odd sight, and one of them, +whose name was Marway, thought to get some fun out of the phenomenon. + +“Here!” he cried, “I want my boots brushed.” + +Clare rose to his feet, saying, + +“Brush the gentleman’s boots. I will finish yours after, and then you +shall finish mine.” + +“Hullo, Nursie! it’s you turned boot-black, is it?--Nice thing for the +office, Jack!” remarked Marway, who was the finest gentleman, and the +lowest blackguard among the clerks. + +He put his foot on the block. The boy began his task, but did no +better with his boots than he had done with Clare’s. + +“Soul of an ass!” cried Marway, “are you going to keep my foot there +till it freezes to the block? Why don’t you do as Nursie tells you? +_He_ knows how to brush a boot! _You_ ain’t worth your salt! You ain’t +fit to black a donkey’s hoofs!” + +“Give me the brushes, my boy,” said Clare. + +The boy rose abashed, and obeyed. After a few of Clare’s light rapid +strokes, the boots looked very different. + +“Bravo, Nursie!” cried Marway. “There ain’t a flunkey of you all could +do it better!” + +Clare said nothing, finished the job, and stood up. Marway, turning on +the other heel as he set his foot down, said, “Thank you, Nursie!” +and was walking off. + +“Please, Mr. Marway, give the boy his penny,” said Clare. + +But Marway wanted to _take a rise out of_ Clare. + +“The fool did nothing for me!” he answered. “He made my boot worse +than it was.” + +“It was I did nothing for you, Mr. Marway,” rejoined Clare. “What I +did, I did for the boy.” + +“Then let the boy pay you!” said Marway. + +The shoe-black went into a sudden rage, caught up one of his brushes, +and flung it at Marway as he turned. It struck him on the side of the +head. Marway swore, stalked up to Clare and knocked him down, then +strode away with a grin. + +The shoe-black sent his second brush whizzing past his ear, but he +took no notice. Clare got up, little the worse, only bruised. + +“See what comes of doing things in a passion!” he said, as the boy +came back with the brushes he had hastened to secure. “Here’s your +penny! Put up your foot.” + +The boy did as he was told, but kept foaming out rage at the bloke +that had refused him his penny, and knocked down his friend. It did +not occur to him that he was himself the cause of the outrage, and +that his friend had suffered for him. Clare’s head ached a good deal, +but he polished the boy’s boots. Then he made him try again on his +boots, when, warmed by his rage, he did a little better. Clare gave +him another penny, and went to the bank. + +Marway was not there, nor did he show himself for a day or two. Clare +said nothing about what had taken place, neither did the others. + + + + + Chapter LXI. + + A WALK WITH CONSEQUENCES. + + +Clare had been in the bank more than a year, and not yet had +Mr. Shotover discovered why he did not quite trust him. Had Clare +known he did not, he would have wondered that he trusted him with such +a precious thing as his little Ann. But was his child very precious to +Mr. Shotover? When a man’s heart is in his business, that is, when he +is set on making money, some precious things are not so precious to +him as they might be--among the rest, the living God and the man’s own +life. He would pass Clare and the child without even a nod to indicate +approval, or a smile for the small woman. He had, I presume, +sufficient regard for the inoffensive little thing to be content she +should be happy, therefore did not interfere with what his clerks +counted so little to the honour of the bank. But although, as I have +said, he still doubted Clare, true eyes in whatever head must have +perceived that the child was in charge of an angel. The countenance of +Clare with Ann in his arms, was so peaceful, so radiant of simple +satisfaction, that surely there were some in that large town who, +seeing them, thought of the angels that do alway behold the face of +the Father in heaven. + +One evening in the early summer, when they had resumed their walks +after five o’clock, they saw, in a waste place, where houses had been +going to be built for the last two years, a number of caravans drawn +up in order. + +A rush of hope filled the heart of Clare: what if it should be the +menagerie he knew so well! And, sure enough, there was Mr. Halliwell +superintending operations! But if Glum Gunn were about, he might find +it awkward with the child in his arms! Gunn might not respect even +her! Besides he ought to ask leave to take her! He would carry her +home first, and come again to see his third mother and all his old +friends, with Pummy and the lion and the rest of the creatures. + +Little Ann was eager to know what those curious houses on wheels +were. Clare told her they were like her Noah’s ark, full of beasts, +only real, live beasts, not beasts made of bits of stick. She became +at once eager to see them--the more eager that her contempt of things +like life that wouldn’t come alive had been growing stronger ever +since she threw her doll out of the window. Clare told her he could +not take her without first asking leave. This puzzled her: Clare was +her highest authority. + +“But if _you_ take me?” she said. + +“Your papa and mamma might not like me to take you.” + +“But I’m yours!” + +“Yes, you’re mine--but not so much,” he added with a sigh, “as +theirs!” + +“Ain’t I?” she rejoined, in a tone of protesting astonishment mingled +with grief, and began to wriggle, wanting to get down. + +Clare set her down, and would have held her, as usual, by the hand, +but she would not let him. She stood with her eyes on the ground, and +her little gray face looking like stone. It frightened Clare, and he +remained a moment silent, reviewing the situation. + +“You see, little one,” he said at length, “you were theirs before I +came! You were sent to them. You are their own little girl, and we +must mind what they would like!” + +“It was only till you came!” she argued. “They don’t care _very_ much +for me. Ask them, please, to sell me to you. I don’t think they would +want much money for me! How many shillings do you think I am worth, +Clare? Not many, I hope!--Six?” + +“You are worth more than all the money in your papa’s bank,” answered +Clare, looking down at her lovingly. + +The child’s face fell. + +“Am I?” she said. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t know I was worth so +much!--and not yours!” she added, with a sigh that seemed to come from +the very heart of her being. “Then you’re not able to buy me?” + +“No, indeed, little one!” answered Clare. “Besides, papas don’t sell +their little girls!” + +“Oh, yes, they do! Gus said so to Trudie!” Clare knew that _Trudie_ +meant her sister Gertrude. + +“Who is Gus?” he asked. + +“Trudie calls him Gus. I don’t know more name to him. Perhaps they +call him something else in the bank.” + +“Oh! he’s in the bank, is he?” returned Clare. “Then I think I know +him.” + +“He said it to her one night in my nursery. Jane went down; I was in +my crib. They talked such a long time! I tried to go to sleep, but I +couldn’t. I heard all what he said to her. It wasn’t half so nice as +what you talk to me!” + +This was not pleasant news to Clare. Augustus Marway was, if half the +tales of him were true, no fit person for his master’s daughter to be +intimate with! He had once heard Mr. Shotover speak about gambling in +such terms of disapprobation as he had never heard him use about +anything else; and it was well known in the bank that Marway was in +the company of gamblers almost every night. He was so troubled, that +at first he wished the child had not told him. For what was he to do? +Could it be right to let the thing go on? Clare felt sure Mr. Shotover +either did not know that Marway gambled, or did not know that he +talked in the nursery with his daughter. But, alas, he could do +nothing without telling, and they all said none but the lowest of cads +would carry tales! For the young men thought it the part of gentlemen +_to stick by each other_, and hide from Mr. Shotover some things he +had a right to know. But Clare saw that, whatever they might think, he +must act in the matter. Little Ann wondered that he scarcely spoke to +her all the way home. But she did not say anything, for she too was +troubled: she did not belong to Clare so much as she had thought she +did! + +Clare reflected also as he went, how much he owed Ann’s sister for +letting him have the little one. She had always spoken to him kindly +too, and never seemed, like the clerks, to look down upon him because +he had been a page-boy--though, he thought, if they were to be as +often hungry as he had been, they would be glad to be page-boys +themselves! For himself, he liked to be a page-boy! He would do +anything for Miss Tempest! And he must do what he could for Miss +Shotover! It would be wicked to let her marry a man that was wicked! +He had himself seen him drunk! Would it be fair, knowing she did not +know, not to tell? Would it not be helping to hurt her? Was he to be a +coward and fear being called bad names? Was he, for the sake of the +good opinion of rascals, to take care of the rascal, and let the lady +take care of herself? There was this difficulty, however, that he +could assert nothing beyond having seen him drunk! + +He carried Ann to the nursery, and set out for the menagerie. When he +knocked at the door of the house-caravan, Mrs. Halliwell opened it, +stared hardly an instant, threw her arms round his neck, and kissed +him. + +“Come in, come in, my boy!” she said. “It makes me a happy woman to +see you again. I’ve been just miserable over what might have befallen +you, and me with all that money of yours! I’ve got it by me safe, +ready for you! I lie awake nights and fancy Gunn has got hold of you, +and made away with you; then fall asleep and am sure of it. He’s been +gone several times, a looking for you, I know! I think he’s afraid of +you; I know he hates you. Mind you keep out of his sight; he’ll do you +a mischief if he has the chance. He’s the same as ever, a man to make +life miserable.” + +“I’ve never done him wrong,” said Clare, “and I’m not going to keep +out of his way as if I were afraid of him! I mean to come and see the +animals to-morrow.” + +A great deal more passed between them. They had their tea +together. Mr. Halliwell, who did not care for tea, came and went +several times, and now the night was dark. Then they spoke again of +Gunn. + +“Well, I don’t think he’ll venture to interfere with you,” said +Mrs. Halliwell, “except he happens to be drunk.--But what’s that +talking? _We_’re all quiet for the night. Listen.” + +For some time Clare had been conscious of the whispered sounds of a +dialogue somewhere near, but had paid no attention. The voices were +now plainer than at first. When his mother told him to listen, he did, +and thought he had heard one of them before. It was peculiar--that of +an old Jew whom he had seen several times at the bank. As the talking +went on, he began to think he knew the other voice also. It was that +of Augustus Marway. The two fancied themselves against a caravan full +of wild beasts. + +Marway was the son of the port-admiral, who, late in life, married a +silly woman. She died young, but not before she had ruined her son, +whose choice company was the least respectable of the officers who +came ashore from the king’s ships. + +He had of late been playing deeper and having worse luck; and had +borrowed until no one would lend him a single sovereign more. His +father knew, in a vague way, how he was going on, and had nearly lost +hope of his reformation. Having yet large remains of a fine physical +constitution, he seldom failed to appear at the bank in the +morning--if not quite in time, yet within the margin of lateness that +escaped rebuke. Mr. Shotover was a connection by marriage, which gave +Marway the privilege of being regarded by Miss Shotover as a cousin--a +privilege with desirable possibilities contingent, making him anxious +to retain the good opinion of his employer. + +Clare heard but a portion here and there of the conversation going on +outside the wooden wall; but it was plain nevertheless that Marway was +pressing a creditor to leave him alone until he was married, when he +would pay every shilling he owed him. + +The young fellow had a persuasive tongue, and boasted he could get the +better of even a Jew. Clare heard the money-lender grant him a renewal +for three months, when, if Marway did not pay, or were not the +accepted suitor of the lady whose fortune was to redeem him, his +creditor would take his course. + +The moment he perceived they were about to part, Clare hastened from +the caravan, and went along the edge of the waste ground, so as to +meet Marway on his road back to the town: at the corner of it they +came jump together. Marway started when Clare addressed him. Seeing, +then, who claimed his attention, he drew himself up. + +“Well?” he said. + +“Mr. Marway,” began Clare, “I heard a great deal of what passed +between you and old Lewin.” + +Marway used worse than vulgar language at times, and he did so now, +ending with the words, + +“A spy! a sneaking spy! Would you like to lick my boot? By Jove, you +shall know the taste of it!” + +“Nobody minds being overheard who hasn’t something to conceal! If I +had low secrets I would not stand up against the side of a caravan +when I wanted to talk about them. I was inside. Not to hear you I +should have had to stop my ears.” + +“Why didn’t you, then, you low-bred flunkey?” + +“Because I had heard of you what made it my duty to listen.” + +Marway cursed his insolence, and asked what he was doing in such a +place. He would report him, he said. + +“What I was doing is my business,” answered Clare. “Had I known you +for an honest man I would not have listened to yours. I should have +had no right.” + +“You tell me to my face I’m a swindler!” said Marway between his +teeth, letting out a blow at Clare, which he cleverly dodged. + +“I do!” + +“I don’t know what you mean, but bitterly shall you repent your +insolence, you prying rascal! This is your sweet revenge for a blow +you had not the courage to return!--to dog me and get hold of my +affairs! You cur! You’re going to turn informer next, of course, and +bear false witness against your neighbour! You shall repent it, I +swear!” + +“Will it be bearing false witness to say that Miss Shotover does not +know the sort of man who wants to marry her? Does she know why he +wants to marry her? Does her father know that you are in the clutches +of a money-lender?” + +Marway caught hold of Clare and threatened to kill him. Clare did not +flinch, and he calmed down a little. + +“What do you want to square it?” he growled. + +“I don’t understand you,” returned Clare. + +“What’s the size of your tongue-plaster?” + +“I don’t know much slang.” + +“What bribe will silence you then? I hope that is plain enough--even +for _your_ comprehension!” + +“If I had meant to hold my tongue, I should have held it.” + +“What do you want, then?” + +“To keep you from marrying Miss Shotover.” + +“By Jove! And suppose I kick you into the gutter, and tell you to mind +your own business--what then?” + +“I will tell either your father or Mr. Shotover all about it.” + +“Even you can’t be such a fool! What good would it do you? You’re not +after her yourself, are you?--Ha! ha!--that’s it! I didn’t nose +that!--But come, hang it! where’s the _use_?--I’ll give you four +flimsies--there! Twenty pounds, you idiot! There!” + +“Mr. Marway, nothing will make me hold my tongue--not even your +promise to drop the thing.” + +“Then what made you come and cheek me? Impudence?” + +“Not at all! I should have been glad enough not to have to do it! I +came to you for my own sake.” + +“That of course!” + +“I came because I would do nothing underhand!” + +“What are you going to do next, then?” + +“I am going to tell Mr. Shotover, or Admiral Marway--I haven’t yet +made up my mind which.” + +“What are you going to tell them?” + +“That old Lewin has given you three months to get engaged to Miss +Shotover, or take the consequences of not being able to pay what you +owe him.” + +“And you don’t count it underhand to carry such a tale?” + +“I do not. It would have been if I hadn’t told you first. I would tell +Miss Shotover, only, if she be anything of a girl, she wouldn’t +believe me.” + +“I should think not! Come, come, be reasonable! I always thought you a +good sort of fellow, though I _was_ rough on you, I confess. There! +take the money, and leave me my chance.” + +“No. I will save the lady if I can. She shall at least know the sort +of man you are.” + +“Then it’s war to the knife, is it?” + +“I mean to tell the truth about you.” + +“Then do your worst. You shall black my boots again.” + +“If I do, I shall have the penny first.” + +“You cringing flunkey!” + +“I haven’t cringed to you, Mr. Marway!” + +Marway tried to kick him, failed, and strode into the dark between him +and the lamps of the town. + + + + + Chapter LXII. + + THE CAGE OF THE PUMA. + + +Marway was a fine, handsome fellow, whose manners, where he saw reason, +soon won him favour, and two of the young men in the office were his +ready slaves. Every moment of the next day Clare was watched. Marway +had laid his plans, and would forestall frustration. Clare could hardly +do anything before the dinner-hour, but Marway would make assurance +double sure. + +At anchor in the roads lay a certain frigate, whose duty it was to +sail round the islands, like a duck about her floating brood. Among +the young officers on board were two with whom Marway was intimate. He +had met them the night before, and they had together laid a plot for +nullifying Clare’s interference with Marway’s scheme--which his friends +also had reason to wish successful, for Marway owed them both money. +Clare had come in the way of all three. + +Now little Ann was a guardian cherub to the object of their enmity, and +he and she must first of all be separated. Clare had asked leave of +Miss Shotover to take the child to Noah’s ark, as she called it, that +evening, and Marway had learned it from her: Clare’s going would favour +their plan, but the child’s presence would render it impracticable. + +One thing in their favour was, that Mr. Shotover was from home. If +Clare had resolved on telling him rather than the admiral, he could +not until the next evening, and that would give them abundant time. On +the other hand, having him watched, they could easily prevent him from +finding the admiral. But Clare had indeed come to the just conclusion +that his master had the first right to know what he had to tell. His +object was not the exposure of Marway, but the protection of his +master’s daughter: he would, therefore, wait Mr. Shotover’s return. +He said to himself also, that Marway would thereby have a chance to +bethink himself, and, like Hamlet’s uncle, “try what repentance can.” + +As soon as he had put the bank in order for the night, he went to find +his little companion, and take her to Noah’s ark. The child had been +sitting all the morning and afternoon in a profound stillness of +expectation; but the hour came and passed, and Clare did not appear. + +“You never, never, never came,” she said to him afterward. “I had to +go to bed, and the beasts went away.” + +It was many long weeks before she told him this, or her solemn little +visage smiled again. + +He went to the little room off the hall, where he almost always found +her waiting for him, dressed to go. She was not there. Nobody came. He +grew impatient, and ran in his eagerness up the front stair. At the +top he met the butler coming from the drawing-room--a respectable old +man, who had been in the family as long as his master. + +“Pardon me, Mr. Porson,” said the butler, who was especially polite to +Clare, recognizing in him the ennoblement of his own order, “but it is +against the rules for any of the gentlemen below to come up this +staircase.” + +“I know I’m in the wrong,” answered Clare; “but I was in such a hurry +I ventured this once. I’ve been waiting for Miss Ann twenty minutes.” + +“If you will go down, I will make inquiry, and let you know directly,” +replied the butler. + +Clare went down, and had not waited more than another minute when the +butler brought the message that the child was not to go out. In vain +Clare sought an explanation; the old man knew nothing of the matter, +but confessed that Miss Shotover seemed a little put out. + +Then Clare saw that his desire to do justice had thwarted his +endeavour: Marway had seen Miss Shotover, he concluded, and had so +thoroughly prejudiced her against anything he might say, that she had +already taken the child from him! He repented that he had told him his +purpose before he was ready to follow it up with immediate +action. Distressed at the thought of little Ann’s disappointment, he +set out for the show, glad in the midst of his grief, that he was +going to see Pummy once more. + +The weather had been a little cloudy all day, but as he left the +closer part of the town, the vaporous vault gave way, and the west +revealed a glorious sunset. Troubled for the trouble of little Ann, +Clare seemed drawn into the sunset. The splendour said to him: “Go on; +sorrow is but a cloud. Do the work given you to do, and the clouds +will keep moving; stop your work and the clouds will settle down +hard.” + +“When I was on the tramp,” thought Clare, “I always went on, and +that’s how I came here. If I hadn’t gone on, I should never have found +the darling!” + +As little as during any day’s tramp did he know how his reflection was +going to be justified. + +He wandered on, and the minutes passed slowly: it was wandering now +with no child in his arms! He was in no haste to go to the menagerie; +he would be in good time for the beasts; and the later he was, the +sooner he would see his mother alone and have a talk with her! + +At last, it being now quite dark, he turned, and made for the +caravans. + +A crowd was going up the steps, passing Mrs. Halliwell slowly, and +descending into the area surrounded by the beasts. Clare went up, and +laid his money on the little white table. The good woman took it with +a smile, threw it in her wooden bowl, and handed him, as if it had +been his change, three bright sovereigns. Clare turned his face +away. He could not take them. He felt as if it would break one bond +between them. + +“The money’s your own!” she said, in a low voice. + +“By and by, mother!” he answered. + +“No, no, take it now,” she insisted, in an almost angry whisper; but +the same moment threw the sovereigns among the silver, and some +coppers that lay on the table over them. + +Judging by her look that he had better say nothing, he turned and went +down the steps. Before he reached the bottom of them, Glum Gunn +elbowed his way past him, throwing a scowl on him from his ugly eyes +at the range of a few inches. + +The place was fuller than it had been all the evening, and with a +rougher sort of company. The show would close in about an hour. It +seemed to Clare not so well lighted as usual. Perhaps that was why he +did not observe that he was watched and followed by Marway, with two +others, and one burly, middle-aged, sailor-looking fellow. But I doubt +whether he would have seen them in any light, for he had no +suspicions, and was not ready to analyze a crowd and distinguish +individuals. + +He avoided making straight for Pummy, contenting himself for the +moment with an occasional glimpse of him between the moving heads, now +opening a vista, now closing it again, for he hoped to get gradually +nearer unseen, so as to be close to the animal when first he should +descry him, for he dreaded attracting attention by becoming, while yet +at a distance, the object of an uproarious outbreak of affection on +the part of the puma. + +But while he was yet a good way from him, a most ferocious yell sprang +full grown into the air, which the very fibres of his body knew as one +of the cries of the puma when most enraged. There he was on his hind +legs, ramping against the front of the cage, every hair on him +bristling, his tail lashing his flanks. The same instant arose a +commotion in the crowd behind Clare, a pushing and stooping and +swaying to and fro, with shouts of, “Here he is! here he is!” + +Filled with a foreboding that was almost a prescience, he fell to +forcing his way without ceremony, and had got a little nearer to the +puma, when, elbowing roughly through the spectators, with red, evil +face, in drink but not drunk, Glum Gunn appeared, almost between him +and the cage--once more, to the horror of Clare, holding by the neck +his poor little Abdiel, curled up into the shape of a flea. The brute +was making his way with him to the cage of the puma, whose wrath, +grown to an indescribable frenzy, now blazed point-blank at the dog. + +I think some waft of the wild odour of the menagerie must have reached +the nostrils of the loving creature, brought back old times and his +master, and waked the hope of finding him. That he had but just +arrived was plain, for he had not had time to get to his master. + +Clare was almost at the edge of the close-packed, staring crowd, +absorbed in the sight of the huge raving cat. Breaking through its +outermost ring in the strength of sudden terror, he darted to the cage +to reach it before Glum Gunn. A man crossed and hustled him. Gunn +opened the door of the cage, and flung Abdiel to the puma. Ere he +could close it, Clare struck him once more a stout left-hander on the +side of his head. Gunn staggered back. Clare sprang into the +cage--just as Pummy spying him uttered a jubilant roar of +recognition. His jumping into the cage just prevented the puma from +getting out, and the crowd from trampling each other to death to +escape The Christians’ Friend; but now that Clare was in, the +cage-door might have swung all night open unheeded--so long, that is, +as no dog appeared. + +As for Abdiel the puma had forgotten him: the dog was out of his sight +for the moment, though only behind him, while his friend and he were +rubbing recognizant noses. Abdiel showed his wisdom by keeping in the +background. The moment he was flung into the cage, he had got into a +corner of it, and stood up on his hind legs. + +His master believed that, knowing how the puma loved the human form +divine, he thought to prejudice him in his favour by showing how near +he could come to it. There he yet stood, his head sunk on his chest, +watching out of his eyes for the terrible moment when his enemy should +again catch sight of him. + +The moment came. The puma’s delight had broken out in wildest +motion. He sprang to the roof of his cage, and grappling there, looked +down with retorted neck, and saw the dog. Poor Abdiel immediately +raised his head, and in hope of propitiation all but forlorn, began a +little dance his master had taught him. + +What Pummy would have done with him, I fear, but I cannot tell. Clare +sprang to the rescue, and the weight of the puma’s bulk descended, not +on Abdiel, but on the shoulders of Clare who had the dog in his +bosom. In a moment more it was evidenced that a common love, however +often the cause of jealousy, is the most powerful mediator between the +generous. The puma forgot his hate, the dog forgot his fear, and +presently, to the admiration of the crowd, Clare and Pummy and Abby +were rolling over and over each other on the floor of the cage. + +Pummy had the best of the rough game. One moment he would be a bend in +a seemingly unloosable knot of confused animality, the next he would +be clinging to the top of his cage, where the others could not follow +him. Perhaps to have a human to play with, was even better than dreams +of loveliest frolics with brothers and sisters, and a mother as madly +merry as they, in still, moonlit nights among the rocks, where neither +sound nor scent of horse woke the devil in any of their bosoms! + +Glum Gunn, too angry to speak, stood watching with a scowl fit for +Lucifer when he rose from his first fall from heaven. He could do +nothing! If he touched one, all three would be upon him! Experience +had taught him what the puma would do in defence of Clare! He must +bide his time!--But he must keep hold of his chance! He drew from his +pocket his master-key, and at a moment when Clare was under the other +two, slid it into the key-hole, and locked the door of the cage. He +had him now--and his beast of a dog too! If he could have turned the +puma mad, and made him tear them both to shreds, he would not have +delayed an instant. But he must think! He must say, like Hamlet, +“About, my brains!” + +The man, however, who wishes to do evil, will find as ready helpers as +he who wishes to do well: in the place were those who wanted Gunn’s +aid, and would give him theirs. + +He felt a touch on his arm, glanced sullenly round, and saw a face +under whose beauty lay the devil. Marway, with eye and thumb, +requested him to withdraw for a moment, and he did not hesitate. As he +went he chuckled to himself at the thought of Clare when he found the +door locked. + +Marway’s three accomplices had drifted off one by one to wait him +outside: he rejoined them with Gunn; and, retiring a little way from +the caravans, the five held a council, the results of which make an +important part of Clare’s history. + +Clare seemed absorbed in his game with his four-footed, one-tailed +friends, but he was wide awake: he had Abdiel to deliver, and kept, +therefore, all the time, at least half an eye on Glum Gunn. He saw +Marway come up to him, and saw them retire together: it was the very +moment to leave the cage with Abdiel! He rose, not without difficulty, +because of the jumping of his playmates upon him and over him, and +went to the door. + +The moment he did so, the crowd was greatly amused to see the puma +turn upon the dog with a snarl, and the dog, at the fearful sound of +altered mood, immediately put on the man, rise to one pair of feet, +and begin to dance. The puma turned from him, went to the heel of his +chosen master, and there stood. + +In vain Clare endeavoured to open the gate. He had never known it +locked, and could not think when it had been done. At length, amid the +laughter of the spectators, he desisted, and the three resumed their +frolics. + +At this the admiration of the visitors broke out. They had seen the +door made fast, and had kept pretty quiet, waiting what would come: +they had thus earned their amusement when he sought in vain to open +it. When his withdrawal confessed him foiled, the merrier began to +mock and the ruder to jeer. But when they saw him laugh, and all three +return to their gambols, they applauded heartily. + +Just before this last portion of the entertainment, Mr. Halliwell, who +had been looking on for a while, retired, not knowing the cage-door +was locked. He went to his wife and said, that, if they had but the +boy and his dog again, and were but free of that brother of his, the +menagerie would be a wild-beast paradise. He would have had her go and +see the pranks in the puma’s cage, but she was too tired, she said; so +he strolled out with his pipe, and left his men to close the +exhibition. Mrs. Halliwell fastened her door and went to bed, a little +hurt that Clare did not come to her. + +Gradually the folk thinned away; and at last only a few who had got in +at half-price remained. To them the attendants hinted that they were +going to shut shop, and one by one they shuffled out, the readier that +Clare was now so tired that Pummy could not get up the merest tail of +a lark more. He was quite fresh himself, and had he been out in the +woods, would certainly not have gone home till morning. But he was +such a human creature that he would not insist when he saw Clare was +weary; and that he had no inclination to play with Abdiel when his +master was out of the game, was quite as well for Abdiel, for Pummy +might have forgot himself. When Abby, not free from fear, as knowing +well he was not free from danger, crept to his master’s bosom, Pummy +gave a low growl, and shoving his nose under the long body of the dog, +with one jerk threw him a yard off upon the floor, whence Abdiel +returned to content himself with his master’s feet, abandoning the +place of honour to one who knew himself stronger, and probably counted +himself better. So they all fell asleep in peace. For although Clare +knew himself and Abdiel Gunn’s prisoners, he feared no surprise with +two such rousable companions. + +[Illustration: CLARE ASLEEP IN THE PUMA’S CAGE.] + + + + + Chapter LXIII. + + THE DOME OF THE ANGELS. + + +When Clare awoke, he knew he had been asleep a long time. It was, +notwithstanding, quite dark, and there was something wrong with +him. His head ached: it had never ached before. He put out his hands: +Pummy’s hairy body was nowhere near. He called Abdiel: no whimper +answered; no cold nose was thrust into his hand. He had gone to sleep, +surely between his two friends! Could he have only dreamed it? + +Why was the darkness so thick? There must surely be light in the +clouds by this time! He felt half awake and half dreaming. + +What was the curious motion he grew aware of? Was something trying to +keep him asleep, or was something trying to wake him? Had they put him +in a big cradle? Were they heaving him about to rouse him? Or could it +be a gentle earthquake that was rocking him to and fro? Would it wake +up in earnest presently, and pull and push, and shake and rattle, +until the dome of the angels came shivering down upon him? + +Where was he? Not on the hard floor of Pummy’s cage, but on something +much harder--like iron. Was he in the wagon in which they carried the +things for setting up the show? Something had happened to him, and his +mother was taking him with her! But in that case he would be lying +softer! _She_ would not have given him a bed so full of aches! + +What would they think at the bank? What would little Ann think if he +came to her no more? + +He could not be in a caravan; the motion was much too smooth and +pleasant for that! + +He put his hand to his face: what was it wet on his cheek? It did not +feel nice; it felt like blood! Had he had a blow on the head? Was that +what gave him this headache? He felt his head all over, but could find +no hurt. + +Why was he lying like a log, wondering and wondering, instead of +getting up and seeing what it all meant? It must be the darkness and +the headache that kept him down! The place was very close! He +_must_ get out of it! + +He tried to get on his feet, but as he rose, his head struck +something, and he dropped back. He got again on his knees and groped +about. On all sides he was closed in. But he was not shut in a dungeon +of stone. He seemed to be in a great wooden box--small enough to be a +box, much too large for a coffin. Could it be one of the oubliettes in +the roof of the doge’s palace at Venice? He laughed at the idea, for +the motion continued, the gentle earthquake that seemed trying to rock +him to sleep: the doge’s palace could hardly be afloat on the grand +canal! + +What could it all mean? What would little Ann do without him? She +would not cry: she never cried--at least, he had never seen her cry! +but that would not make it easier for her! + +What had become of Abdiel? Had Glum Gunn got him? Then the wet on his +face was Abdiel’s blood--shed in his defence, perhaps, when his +enemies were taking him away! + +Fears and anxieties, such as he had never known before, began to crowd +upon him--not for himself; he was not made to think of himself, either +first or second. Something dreadful might be going on that he could +not prevent! He had never been so miserable. It was high time to do +something--to ask the great one somewhere, he did not know where, who +could somehow, he did not know how, hear the thoughts that were not +words, to do what ought to be done for little Ann, and Abdiel, and +Pummy! He prayed in his heart, lay still, and fell fast asleep. + +He came to himself again, in the act of drawing a deep breath of cool, +delicious air. He was no longer shut in the dark, stifling box. He was +coming alive! A comforting wind blew all about him. It was like a live +thing putting its own life into him. But his eyelids were heavy; he +was unable to open them. + +All at once they opened of themselves. + +The dome of the angels had come down and closed in round him, but +bringing room for him, taking none away. It was blue, and filled with +the loveliest white clouds, possessed by a blowing wind that never was +able to blow them away. They were of strangely regular shapes; not the +less were they alive--piled one above the other, up and up--up ever so +high! They all kept their places, and some had the loveliest blue +shadows upon them, which glided about a little. But the dome of the +angels rose high, and ever higher still, above them. The dome of the +angels was at home, and the clouds were at home in it. He gazed +entranced at the sight. Then came a sudden strong heave and roll of +the earthquake, and a light shone in his eyes that blinded him. + +It was but the strong friendly sun. When Clare opened his eyes again, +he knew that he was lying on the deck of one of the great ships he had +so frequently looked at from the shore. Oh, how often had he not +longed after this one and that one of them, as if in some one +somewhere, perhaps in that one, lay something he could not do without, +which yet he could never set his eyes, not to say his hands upon. He +had his heart’s desire, and what was to come of it? He lay on the +ship, and the ship lay on the sea, a little world afloat on the water, +moving as a planet moves through the heavens, but carrying her own +heaven with her, attended by her own clouds, bearing her whither she +would. Up into those clouds he lay gazing, up into the dome of the +angels, drawing deeper and deeper breaths of gladness, too happy to +think--when a foot came with a kick in the ribs, and a voice ordered +him to get up: was he going to lie there till the frigate was paid +off? + + + + + Chapter LXIV. + + THE PANTHER. + + +Clare scrambled to his feet, and surveyed the man who had thus roused +him. He had a vague sense of having seen him before, but could not +remember where. Feeling faint, and finding himself beside a gun, he +leaned upon it. + +The sailor regarded him with an insolent look. + +“Wake up,” he said, “an’ come along to the cap’n. What’s the service a +comin’ to, I should like to know, when a beggarly shaver like you has +the cheek to stow hisself away on board one o’ his majesty’s frigates! +Wouldn’ nothin’ less suit your highness than a berth on the Panther?” + +“Is that the name of the ship?” asked Clare. + +“Yes, that’s the name of the ship!” returned the man, mimicking +him. “You’ll have the Panther, his mark, on the back o’ _you_ +presently! Come along, I say, to the cap’n! We ha’ got to ask _him_, +what’s to be done wi’ rascals as rob their masters, an’ then stow +theirselves away on board his majesty’s ships!” + +“Take me to the captain,” said Clare. + +The man seemed for a moment to doubt whether there might not be some +mistake: he had expected to see him cringe. But he took him by the +collar behind, and pushed him along to the quarter-deck, where an +elderly officer was pacing up and down alone. + +“Well, Tom,” said the captain, stopping in his walk, “what’s the +matter? Who’s that you’ve got?” + +“Please yer honour,” answered the boatswain, giving Clare a shove, +“this here’s a stowaway in his majesty’s ship, Panther. I found him +snug in the cable-tier.--Salute the captain, you beggar!” + +Clare had no cap to lift, but he bowed like the gentleman he was. The +captain stood looking at him. Clare returned his gaze, and smiled. A +sort of tremble, much like that in the level air on a hot summer day, +went over the captain’s face, and he looked harder at Clare. + +A sound arose like the purring of an enormous cat, and, sure enough, +it was nothing else: chained to the foot of the forward binnacle stood +a panther, a dark yellow creature with black spots, bigger than Pummy, +swinging his tail. Clare turned at the noise he made. The panther made +a bound and a leap to the height and length of his chain, and uttered +a cry like a musical yawn. Clare stretched out his arms, and staggered +toward him. The next moment the animal had him. The captain darted to +the rescue. But the beast was only licking him wherever there was a +bare spot to lick; and Clare wondered to find how many such spots +there were: he was in rags! The panther kept tossing him over and over +as if he were a baby, licking as he tossed, and in his vibrating body +and his whole behaviour manifested an exceeding joy. The captain stood +staring “like one that hath been stunned.” + +The boatswain was not astonished: he had seen Clare at home among wild +animals, and thought the panther was taken with the wild-beast smell +about him. + +“I beg your pardon, sir,” said Clare, rolling himself out of the +panther’s reach, and rising to his feet, “but wild things like me, +somehow! I slept with a puma last night. He and this panther, sir, +would have a terrible fight if they met!” + +The captain threw a look of disappointment at the panther. + +“Go forward, Tom,” he said. + +The man did not like the turn things had taken, and as he went wore +something of the look of one doomed to make the acquaintance of +another kind of cat. + +“What made you come on board this ship, my lad?” asked the captain, in +a voice so quiet that it sounded almost kind. + +“I did not come on board, sir.” + +“Don’t trifle with _me_,” returned the captain sternly. + +Clare looked straight at him, and said-- + +“I have done nothing wrong, sir. I know you will help me. I fell +asleep last night, as I told you, sir, in the cage of a puma. I knew +him, of course! How I came awake on board your ship, I know no more +than you do, sir.” + +The smile of Clare’s childhood had scarcely altered, and it now shone +full on the captain. He turned away, and made a tack or two on the +quarter-deck. He was a tall, thin man, with a graceful carriage, and a +little stoop in the shoulders. He had a handsome, sad face, growing +old. His hair was more than half way to gray, and he seemed somewhere +about fifty. He had the sternness of a man used to command, but under +the sternness Clare saw the sadness. + +The attention of the boy was now somewhat divided between the captain +and his panther, which seemed possessed with a fierce desire to get at +him, though plainly with no inimical intent. The attention of the +captain seemed divided between the boy and the panther; his eyes now +rested for a moment on the animal, now turned again to the boy. Two +officers on the port side of the quarter-deck stole glances at the +strange group--the stately, solemn, still man; the ragged creature +before him, who looked in his face without fear or anxiety, and with +just as little presumption; and the wildly excited panther, whose +fierce bounding alternated with cringing abasement of his beautiful +person, accompanied by loving sweeps of his most expressive tail. + +The captain made a tack or two more on the quarter-deck, then turned +sharp on the boy. + +“What is your name?” he asked. + +“I don’t quite know, sir,” answered Clare. + +“Come with me,” said the captain. + +To the surprise of the officers, he led the way to his state-room, and +the boy followed. The panther gave a howl as Clare disappeared. The +officers remarked that the captain looked strange. His lips were +compressed as if with vengeance, but the muscles of his face were +twitching. + + + + + Chapter LXV. + + AT HOME. + + +Clare followed, wondering, but nowise anxious. He saw nothing to make +him anxious. The captain looked a good man, and a good man was a +friend to Clare! But when he entered the state-room, and saw himself +from head to foot in a mirror let into a bulkhead, he was both +startled and ashamed: how could the captain take such a scarecrow into +his room! he thought. He did not reflect that it was just the sort of +thing he did himself. He had indeed felt dirty and disreputable, and +been aware of the dry, rasping tongue of the panther on many patches +of bare skin, but he had had no idea what a wretched creature he +looked. Not one of the garments he saw in the mirror was his own, and +they were disgracefully torn. His hair was sticking out every way, and +his face smeared with blood. His feet were bare, and one trouser-leg +rent to the knee. His enemies had done their best to ensure prejudice, +and frustrate belief. They did not see in his look what no honest man +could misread. Innocent as he knew himself, he could not help feeling +for a moment disconcerted. But his faithfulness threw him on the mercy +of the man before him. + +The captain turned and sat down. The boy stood in the doorway, staring +at his reflex self in the mirror. The captain understood his +consternation. + +“Come along, my poor boy,” he said. “How did you get into this mess?” + +“I think I know,” answered Clare, “but I’m not sure.” + +“You must have been drunk,” sighed the captain. + +“Oh, no, sir!” returned Clare, with one of his radiant smiles. “I’ve +had but one glass of beer in my life, and I didn’t like it.” + +The captain smiled too, and gazed at him for several moments without +speaking. + +“It seems to me,” he said at last, but as if he were thinking of +something quite different, “you must be in want of food.” + +“Oh, no, sir!” answered Clare again, “I’m used to going without.” + +Like a child the sport of an evil fairy, he was again the boy of the +old wanderings, in the old, hungry times. But did he ever look so lost +as in the mirror before him? he wondered. + +“You haven’t told me----” said the captain, and stopped short, as if +he dreaded going further. + +“I will tell you anything you want to know, sir. Please ask me.” + +“You say you did not come on board the frigate: what am I to +understand by that?” + +“That I was brought, sir, in my sleep. It wouldn’t be fair, would it, +sir, to mention names, when I don’t know for certain who they were +that brought me? I never knew anything till I opened my eyes, and +thought I was in----” + +He paused. + +“_Where_ did you think you were?” asked the captain eagerly. + +“In the dome of the angels, sir,” answered Clare. + +The captain’s face fell. He thought him an innocent, on whom rascals +had been playing a practical joke. But that made no difference! If he +were a simpleton, he might none the less be----! Was _her_ boy left +to----? + +He shuddered visibly, and again was silent. + +“Tell me,” he said at length, “what you remember.” + +He meant--of the circumstances that immediately preceded his coming to +himself on board the Panther; but Clare began with the first thing his +memory presented him with. Perhaps he was yet a little dazed. He had +not got through a single sentence, when he saw that something earlier +wanted telling first; and the same thing happening again and again +within the first five minutes of his narration, sir Harry saw he had +before him a boy either of fertile imagination, or of “strange, +eventful history.” But either supposition had its difficulty. If, on +the one hand, he had had the tenth part of the experiences hinted at; +if, for one thing, he had been but a single month on the tramp, how +had he kept such an innocent face, such an angelic smile? If, on the +other hand, he was making up these tales, why did he not look sharper? +and whence the angelic smile? Did the seeming innocence indicate only +such a lack of intellect as occasionally accompanies a remarkable +individual gift? He must make him begin at the beginning, and tell +everything he knew, or might pretend to know about himself! + +“Stop,” he said. “You told me you did not quite know your name: what +did they call you as far back as you can remember?” + +“Clare Porson,” answered the boy. + +At the first word the captain gave a little cry, but repressed his +emotion, and went on. His face was very white, and his breath came and +went quickly. + +“Why did you say you did not _quite_ know your name?” + +“My father and mother called me by their name because there was nobody +to tell them what my real name was.” + +“Then they weren’t your own father and mother that gave you the name?” + +“No, sir. I’m but using theirs till I get my own. I shall one day.” + +“Why do you think so?” + +“Don’t _you_ think, sir, that everything will come right one day?” + +“God grant it!” responded the captain with a groan, self-reproached +for the little faith beside the strong desire. + +“Do you think it wrong, sir, to use a name that is not quite my own?” +said Clare. “People sometimes seem to think so.” + +“Not at all, my boy! You must have a name. You did not steal it. They +gave it you.” + +The look of the boy when he thus answered him, completely restored sir +Harry’s confidence in his mental soundness, while both the mode and +the nature of his answer to every question he put to him, bore the +strongest impress of truth. + +“If the boy be a liar,” he said to himself, “I will never more trust +my kind. I will turn to the wild-beasts, and believe in panthers and +hyenas!” + +“They did, sir,” answered Clare. “Mr. Porson gave me his own name, and +he was a clergyman. So I thought afterwards, when I had to think about +it, that it couldn’t be wrong to use it.” + +But how could sir Harry palter so with himself? He might have got at +the necessary facts so much quicker! + +Sir Harry shrank from seeing his suddenly wakened hope, dead for many +a year, crumble before his eyes. He dared not yet drive question +close. + +“Did Mr. Porson give you both your names?” he asked. + +“No, sir. My mother said I brought the first with me. She said I told +them--I don’t remember myself--that my name was Clare.” + +The captain drove back the words that threatened to break from his +lips in spite of him. His boy’s name was Clarence, but his mother, +whose dearest friend was a _Clara_, called her child always _Clare_! + +“I mean my second mother, sir,” explained Clare; “my own mother is in +the dome of the angels.” + +A flash lightened from the captain’s eyes, but he seemed to himself to +have gone blind. Clare saw the flash, and wondered. + +Again _the dome of the angels_! The words burst into meaning. Out of +the depths of the world of life rose to his mind’s eye the terrible +thing that had made him a lonely man. Again he stood with his head +thrown back, looking up at the Assumption of the Virgin painted in +that awful dome; again the earthquake seized the church, and shook the +painted heaven down upon them. He knew no more. His little boy had +been standing near him, holding his mother’s hand, but staring up like +his father! + +He had to force the next words from his throat. + +“Where did the good people who gave you their name find you?” + +“Sitting on my mother--my own mother. The angels fell down on her, and +when they went up again, she had got mixed with them, and went up +too.” + +Some people thought my friend Skymer “a little queer, you know!” I +leave my reader to his own thought: he will judge after his +kind. Clare’s father no longer doubted his perfect faculty. + +All through Clare’s life, as often as the old, vague, but ever ready +vision brought back its old feelings, with them came the old thoughts, +the old forms of them, and the old words their attendant shadows; and +then Clare talked like a child. + +The stern, sorrowful man hid his face in his hands. + +“Grace,” he murmured--and Clare knew somehow that he spoke to his +wife, “we have him again! We will never distrust him more!” + +His frame heaved with the choking of his sobs. + +Then Clare understood that the grand man was his father. The awe of a +perfect gladness fell upon him. He knelt before him, and laid his +hands together as in prayer. + +“Why did you distrust me, father?” said the half-naked outcast. + +“It was not my child, it was my father I distrusted. I am ashamed,” +said sir Harry, and clasped him in his arms. + +The boy laid his blood-stained face against his father’s bosom, and +his soul was in a better home than a sky full of angels, a home better +than the dome itself of all the angels, for his home was his father’s +heart. + +How long they remained thus I cannot tell. It seemed to both as if so +it had been from eternity, and so to eternity it would be. When a +thing is as it should be, then we know it is from eternity to +eternity. The true is. + +The father relaxed at length the arms that strained his child to his +heart. Clare looked up with white, luminous face. He gazed at his +father, cried like little Ann, “You’re come!” and slid to his feet. He +clasped and kissed and clung to them--would hardly let them go. + +All this time the officers on the quarter-deck were wondering what the +captain could have to do with the beggarly stowaway. The panther stood +on his feet, anxiously waiting, his ears starting at every sound. He +was longing for the boy with whom he had played, panther cub with +human infant, in the years long gone by. The sweet airs of his +childhood were to the panther plainly recognizable through all the +accretions that disfigured but could not defile him. The two were the +same age. They had rolled on floor and deck together when neither +could hurt--and now neither would. For the animal was perfectly +harmless, and chained only because apt to be unseasonably +frolicsome. When they let him loose, it was a season of high jinks and +rare skylarking. Then the men had to look out! He had twice knocked a +man overboard, and had once tumbled overboard himself. But he had +never killed a creature, was always gentle with children, and might be +trusted to look after any infant. + +Sir Harry raised his son, kissed him, set him on his own chair, and +retired into an inner cabin. + +A knock came to the door. Clare said, “Come in.” The quartermaster +entered. Instead of sir Harry, he saw the miserable stowaway, seated +in the captain’s own chair. He swore at him, and ordered him out, +prepared to give him a kick as he passed. + +“Out with you!” he cried. “Go for’ard. Tell the bo’s’n to look out a +rope’s end. I’ll be after you.” + +“The captain told me to sit here,” answered Clare, and sat. + +The officer looked closer at him, begged his pardon, saluted, and +withdrew. + +The father heard, and said to himself, “The boy is a gentleman: he +knows where to take his orders.” + +He called him into the inner cabin, and there washed him from head to +foot, rejoicing to find under his rags a skin as clean as his own. + +“Now what are we to do for clothes, Clare?” said sir Harry. + +“Perhaps somebody would lend me some,” answered Clare. “Mayn’t I be +your cabin-boy, father? You will let me be a sailor, won’t you, and +sail always with you?” + +“You shall be a sailor, my boy,” answered sir Harry, “and sail with me +as long as God pleases. You know to obey orders!” + +“I will obey the cook if you tell me, father.” + +“You shall obey nobody but myself,” returned sir Harry; “--and the +lord high admiral,” he added, with a glance upward, and a smile like +his son’s. + +For that day Clare kept to the captain’s state-room; the next, he went +on deck in a midshipman’s uniform, which he wore like a gentleman that +could obey orders. + + + + + Chapter LXVI. + + THE END OF CLARE SKYMER’S BOYHOOD. + + +His father had a hammock slung for him in the state-room; he could not +be parted from him even when they slept. + +One night sir Harry, lying awake, heard a movement in the state-room, +and got up. It was a still, star-lit night. The frigate was dreaming +away northward with all sail set. Through the windows shone the level +stars. From a beam above hung a dim lamp. He could see no one. He went +to the hammock. There was no boy in it. Then he spied him, kneeling +under the stern-windows, with his head down. + +“Anything the matter, Clare?” he asked. + +“No, father.” + +“What are you doing?” + +“Trying to say _Thank you for my father!_” + +“Oh, thank him, thank him, my boy!” returned sir Harry. “Thank him +with all your heart. He will give us _her_ some day!” + +“Yes, father, he will!” responded Clare. + +His father knelt beside him, but neither said word that the other +heard. + +The next night, Clare was on the quarter-deck with his father, and +heard him give certain orders to the officers of the watch. He had +never heard orders given in such a way: he spoke so quietly, so +directly, so simply! The night was gusty and dark, threatening foul +weather. The captain measured the quarter-deck as when first Clare saw +him, but with a mien how different! He walked as slow and stately as +before, but with a look almost of triumph in his eyes, glancing often +at the clouds. The thought of having such a father made Clare tremble +with delight from head to foot. His father was the power of the +sea-planet that bore them! Him the great vessel, and all aboard of +her, obeyed! He was the life of her motions, the soul of her! At his +pleasure she bowed her obedient head, and swept over the seas! Clare’s +heart swelled within him. + +But this father had, the night before, knelt with him in the presence +of one unseen, worshipping and thanking a higher than himself! As the +captain of the Panther sailed his frigate through the seas, so the +great father, the father of his father, the father of all fathers, to +whom the captain kneeled as a little child, sailed through the heaven +of heavens the huge ship of the world, guided fleet upon fleet +innumerable through trackless space! And over an infinitely grander +sea than the measureless ocean of worlds, the Father was carrying +navies of human souls, every soul a world whose affairs none but the +Father could understand, through many a storm, and waterspout, and +battle with the powers of evil, safe to the haven of the children, the +Father’s house! And Clare began to understand that so it was. + +One day his father said to him-- + +“Clare, whatever you forget, whatever you remember, mind this--that +you and I and your mother are the children of one father, and that we +have all three to be good children to that father. If we do as he +tells us, he will bring us all at length to the same port. Our admiral +is Jesus Christ. We take our orders from him. But each has to sail his +own ship.” + +The boatswain shook in his wide shoes, but Clare never showed him the +least disfavour. He recognized at once the two officers he had seen at +the menagerie, but beyond giving each a look he could hardly mistake, +he showed no sign of having any knowledge of them. + +He set himself to be a sailor, and learned fast. I need scarcely say +he was as precise in obeying any superior officer as the best sailor +on board. In a few weeks he felt and looked to the manner born--as +indeed he was, for not only his father, but his grandfather, and his +great-grandfather, and more yet of his ancestors,--how many I do not +know, were sailors. + +He had had a rough shaking. The earthquake had come and gone, and come +again and gone a many times. But the shaking earth was his nurse, and +she taught him to dwell in a world that cannot be shaken. + + + + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A ROUGH SHAKING *** + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will +be renamed. + +Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright +law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, +so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the +United States without permission and without paying copyright +royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part +of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project +Gutenberg™ electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG™ +concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, +and may not be used if you charge for an eBook, except by following +the terms of the trademark license, including paying royalties for use +of the Project Gutenberg trademark. 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You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms +of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online +at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you +are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the +country where you are located before using this eBook. +</div> +<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: A Rough Shaking</div> +<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: George MacDonald</div> +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: September, 2005 [EBook #8886]<br> +This file was first posted on August 20, 2003<br> +Last Updated: May 20, 2023</div> +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</div> +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Character set encoding: UTF-8</div> +<div style='display:block; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Produced by: Distributed Proofreaders</div> +<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A ROUGH SHAKING ***</div> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h1>A ROUGH SHAKING</h1> +</div> + +<p class="center big p2 p0">By George MacDonald</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="CONTENTS">CONTENTS.</h2> +</div> + +<table class="autotable"> +<tr><th class="tdr"><span class="smcap">Chap.</span><th></th></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_I">I.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">How I came to know Clare Skymer.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_II">II.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">With his Parents.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_III">III.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Without his Parents.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_IV">IV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The New Family.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_V">V.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">His New Home.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_VI">VI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">What did draw out his first Smile.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_VII">VII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Clare and his Brothers.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_VIII">VIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Clare and his Human Brothers.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_IX">IX.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Clare the Defender.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_X">X.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Black Aunt.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XI">XI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Clare on the Farm.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XII">XII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Clare becomes a Guardian of the Poor.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XIII">XIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Clare the Vagabond.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XIV">XIV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Their first Helper.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XV">XV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Their first Host.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XVI">XVI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">On the Tramp.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XVII">XVII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Baker’s Cart.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XVIII">XVIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Beating the Town.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XIX">XIX.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Blacksmith and his Forge.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XX">XX.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Tommy reconnoitres.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXI">XXI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Tommy is Found and Found out.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXII">XXII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Smith in a Rage.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXIII">XXIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Treasure Trove.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXIV">XXIV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Justifiable Burglary.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXV">XXV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">A New Quest.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXVI">XXVI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">A New Entrance.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXVII">XXVII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Baby has her Breakfast.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXVIII">XXVIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Treachery.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXIX">XXIX.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Baker.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXX">XXX.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Draper.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXXI">XXXI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">An Addition to the Family.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXXII">XXXII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Shop and Baby.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXXIII">XXXIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">A Bad Penny.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXXIV">XXXIV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">How Things went for a Time.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXXV">XXXV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Clare disregards the Interests of his Employers.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXXVI">XXXVI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Policeman.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXXVII">XXXVII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Magistrate.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXXVIII">XXXVIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Workhouse.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XXXIX">XXXIX.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Away.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XL">XL.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Maly.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XLI">XLI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Caravans.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XLII">XLII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Nimrod.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XLIII">XLIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Across Country.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XLIV">XLIV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">A Third Mother.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XLV">XLV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Menagerie.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XLVI">XLVI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Angel of the Wild Beasts.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XLVII">XLVII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Glum Gunn.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XLVIII">XLVIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Puma.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_XLIX">XLIX.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Glum Gunn’s Revenge.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_L">L.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Clare seeks Help.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LI">LI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Clare a true Master.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LII">LII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Miss Tempest.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LIII">LIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Gardener.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LIV">LIV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Kitchen.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LV">LV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Wheel rests for a Time.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LVI">LVI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Strategy.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LVII">LVII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Ann Shotover.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LVIII">LVIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Child-talk.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LIX">LIX.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">Lovers’ Walks.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LX">LX.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Shoe-black.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LXI">LXI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">A Walk with Consequences.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LXII">LXII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Cage of the Puma.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LXIII">LXIII.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Dome of the Angels.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LXIV">LXIV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The Panther.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LXV">LXV.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">At Home.</span></td></tr> +<tr><td class="tdr"><a href="#Chapter_LXVI">LXVI.</a></td> +<td><span class="smcap">The End of Clare Skymer’s Boyhood.</span></td></tr> +</table> + + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2>ILLUSTRATIONS.</h2> + +</div> +<table class="autotable"> +<tr><td><a href="#000"><span class="smcap">Mrs. Porson finds Clare by the side of his dead Mother</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#001a"><span class="smcap">Clare is heard talking to Maly</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#002"><span class="smcap">Clare makes Friends during Mr. Porson’s Absence</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#003"><span class="smcap">The Blacksmith gives Clare and Tommy a Rough Greeting</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#001"><span class="smcap">Clare, Tommy, and the Baby in Custody</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#004"><span class="smcap">Clare and Abdiel at the locked Pump</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#005"><span class="smcap">Clare proceeds to untie the Ropes from the Ring in the Bull’s Nose</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#006"><span class="smcap">Clare finds the Advantage of a Powerful Friend</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#007"><span class="smcap">The Gardener’s Discomfiture</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#008a"><span class="smcap">Clare asks Miss Shotover to let him carry Ann home</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#008b"><span class="smcap">Clare is found giving the Shoe-black a Lesson</span></a></td></tr> +<tr><td><a href="#008"><span class="smcap">Clare asleep in the Puma’s Cage</span></a></td></tr> +</table> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<p class="center p0">Dedicated +to my great-nephew,<br> +Norman MacKay Binney,<br> +aged seven,<br> +because his Godfather and Godmother +love him dearly.</p> + +<p>Hampstead, August 26, 1890.</p> + +</div> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<p class="center xbig">A ROUGH SHAKING.</p> + +<hr class="tb"> + + +<h2 id="Chapter_I">Chapter I.<br><span class="smcap">How I came to know Clare Skymer.</span></h2> +</div> + +<p>It was a day when everything around seemed almost perfect: everything +does, now and then, come nearly right for a moment or two, preparatory +to coming all right for good at the last. It was the third week in +June. The great furnace was glowing and shining in full force, driving +the ship of our life at her best speed through the ocean of space. For +on deck, and between decks, and aloft, there is so much more going on +at one time than at another, that I may well say she was then going at +her best speed, for there is quality as well as rate in motion. The +trees were all well clothed, most of them in their very best. Their +garments were soaking up the light and the heat, and the wind was +going about among them, telling now one and now another, that all was +well, and getting through an immense amount of comfort-work in a +single minute. It said a word or two to myself as often as it passed +me, and made me happier than any boy I know just at present, for I was +an old man, and ought to be more easily made happy than any mere +beginner.</p> + +<p>I was walking through the thin edge of a little wood of big trees, +with a slope of green on my left stretching away into the sunny +distance, and the shadows of the trees on my right lying below my +feet. The earth and the grass and the trees and the air were together +weaving a harmony, and the birds were leading the big orchestra—which +was indeed on the largest scale. For the instruments were so +different, that some of them only were meant for sound; the part of +others was in odour, of others yet in shine, and of still others in +motion; while the birds turned it all as nearly into words as they +could. Presently, to complete the score, I heard the tones of a man’s +voice, both strong and sweet. It was talking to some one in a way I +could not understand. I do not mean I could not understand the words: +I was too far off even to hear them; but I could not understand how +the voice came to be so modulated. It was deep, soft, and musical, +with something like coaxing in it, and something of tenderness, and +the intent of it puzzled me. For I could not conjecture from it the +age, or sex, or relation, or kind of the person to whom the words were +spoken. You can tell by the voice when a man is talking to himself; it +ought to be evident when he is talking to a woman; and you can, +surely, tell when he is talking to a child; you could tell if he were +speaking to him who made him; and you would be pretty certain if he +was holding communication with his dog: it made me feel strange that I +could not tell the kind of ear open to the gentle, manly voice saying +things which the very sound of them made me long to hear. I confess to +hurrying my pace a little, but I trust with no improper curiosity, to +see—I cannot say the interlocutors, for I had heard, and still heard, +only one voice.</p> + +<p>About a minute’s walk brought me to the corner of the wood where it +stopped abruptly, giving way to a field of beautiful grass; and then I +saw something it does not need to be old to be delighted withal: the +boy that would not have taken pleasure in it, I should count half-way +to the gallows. Up to the edge of the wood came, I say, a large +field—acres on acres of the sweetest grass; and dividing it from both +wood and path stood a fence of three bars, which at the moment +separated two as genuine lovers as ever wall of “stones with lime and +hair knit up” could have sundered. On one side of the fence stood a +man whose face I could not see, and on the other one of the loveliest +horses I had ever set eyes upon. I am no better than a middling fair +horseman, but, for this horse’s sake, I may be allowed to mention that +my friends will all have me look at any horse they think of buying. +He was over sixteen hands, with well rounded barrel, clean limbs, +small head, and broad muzzle; hollows above his eyes of hazy blue, and +delicacy of feature, revealed him quite an old horse. His ears pointed +forward and downward, as if they wanted on their own account to get a +hold of the man the nose was so busily caressing. Neither, I presume, +had heard my approach; for all true-love-endearments are shy, and the +man had his arm round the horse’s neck, and was caressing his face, +talking to him much as Philip Sidney’s lady, whose lips “seemed at +once to kiss and speak,” murmured to her pet sparrow, only here the +voice was a musical baritone. That there was something between them +more than an ordinary person would be likely to understand appeared +patent.</p> + +<p>Whether or not I made an involuntary sound I cannot tell: I was so +taken with the sight, bearing to me an aspect of something eternal, +that I do not know how I carried myself; but the horse gave a little +start, half lifted his head, saw me, threw it up, uttered a shrill +neigh of warning, stepped back a pace, and stood motionless, waiting +apparently for an order from his master—if indeed I ought not rather +to call them friends than master and servant.</p> + +<p>The man looked round, saw me, turned toward me, and showing no sign +that my appearance was unexpected, lifted his hat with a courtesy most +Englishmen would reserve for a lady, and advanced a step, almost as if +to welcome a guest. I may have owed something of this reception to the +fact that he saw before him a man advanced in years, for my beard is +very gray, and that by no means prematurely. I saw before me one +nearly, if not quite as old as myself. His hair and beard, both rather +long, were quite white. His face was wonderfully handsome, with the +stillness of a summer sea upon it. Its features were very marked and +regular and fine, for the habit of the man was rather spare. What with +his white hair and beard, and a certain radiance in his pale +complexion, which, I learned afterward, no sun had ever more than +browned a little, he reminded me for a moment as he turned, of Cato on +the shore of Dante’s purgatorial island.</p> + +<p>“I fear,” I said, “I have intruded!” There was no path where I had +come along.</p> + +<p>The man laughed—and his laugh was more friendly than an invitation to +dinner.</p> + +<p>“The land is mine,” he answered; “no one can say you intrude.”</p> + +<p>“Thank you heartily. I live not very far off, and know the country +pretty well, but have got into a part of which I am ignorant.”</p> + +<p>“You are welcome to go where you will on my property,” he answered. +“I could not close a field without some sense of having thrown a +fellow-being into a dungeon. Whatever be the rights of land, space can +belong to the individual only ‘<i>as it were</i>,’ to use a Shakspere-phrase. +All the best things have to be shared. The house plainly was designed +for a family.”</p> + +<p>While he spoke, I scarce heeded his words for looking at the man, so +much he interested me. His face was of the palest health, with a faint +light from within. He looked about sixty years of age. His forehead +was square, and his head rather small, but beautifully modelled; his +eyes were of a light hazel, friendly as those of a celestial +dog. Though slender in build, he looked strong, and every movement +denoted activity.</p> + +<p>I was not ready with an answer to what he said. He turned from me, and +as if to introduce a companion and so render the interview easier, he +called, in tone as gentle as if he spoke to a child, but with that +peculiar intonation that had let me understand it was not to a child +he was speaking, “Memnon! come;” and turned again to me. His movement +and words directed my attention again to the horse, who had stood +motionless. At once, but without sign of haste, the animal walked up +to the rails, rose gently on his hind legs, came over without +touching, walked up to his master, and laid his head on his shoulder.</p> + +<p>I bethought me now who the man was. He had been but a year or two in +the neighbourhood, though the property on which we now stood had been +his own for a good many years. Some said he had bought it; others knew +he had inherited it. All agreed he was a very peculiar person, with +ways so oddly unreasonable that it was evident he had, in his +wanderings over the face of the earth, gradually lost hold of what +sense he might at one time have possessed, and was in consequence a +good deal cracked. There seemed nothing, however, in his behaviour or +appearance to suggest such a conclusion: a man could hardly be counted +beside himself because he was on terms of friendship with his +horse. It took me but a moment to recall his name—Skymer—one odd +enough to assist the memory. I caught it ere he had done mingling +fresh caresses with those of his long-tailed friend. When I came to +know him better, I knew that he had thus given me opportunity—such as +he would to a horse—of thinking whether I should like to know him +better: Mr. Skymer’s way was not to offer himself, but to give easy +opportunity to any who might wish to know him. I learned afterward +that he knew my name and suspected my person: being rather prejudiced +in my favour because of the kind of thing I wrote, he was now waiting +to see whether approximation would follow.</p> + +<p>“Pardon my rude lingering,” I said; “that lovely animal is enough to +make one desire nearer acquaintance with his owner. I don’t think I +ever saw such a perfect creature!”</p> + +<p>I remembered the next moment that I had heard said of Mr. Skymer that +he liked beasts better than men, but I soon found this was only one of +the foolish things constantly said of honest men by those who do not +understand them.</p> + +<p>There are women even who love dogs and dislike children; but, nauseous +fact as this is, it is not so nauseous as the fact that there are men +who believe in no animal rights, or in any God of the animals, and +think we may do what we please with them, indulging at their cost an +insane thirst after knowledge. Injustice may discover facts, but never +truth.</p> + +<p>“I grant him nearly a perfect creature,” he answered, “But he is far +more nearly perfect than you yet know him! Excuse me for speaking so +confidently; but if we were half as far on for men, as Memnon is for a +horse, the kingdom of heaven would be a good deal nearer!”</p> + +<p>“He seems an old horse!”</p> + +<p>“He is an old horse—much older than you can think after seeing him +come over that paling as he did. He is forty.”</p> + +<p>“Is it possible!”</p> + +<p>“I know and can prove his age as certainly as my own. He is the son of +an Arab mare and an English thoroughbred.—Come here, Memnon!”</p> + +<p>The horse, who had been standing behind like a servant in waiting, put +his beautiful head over his master’s shoulder.</p> + +<p>“Memnon,” said Mr. Skymer, “go home and tell Mrs. Waterhouse I hope to +bring a gentleman with me to lunch.”</p> + +<p>The horse walked gently past us, then started at a quick trot, which +almost immediately became a gallop.</p> + +<p>“The dear fellow,” said his master, “would not gallop like that if he +were on the hard road; he knows I would not like it.”</p> + +<p>“But, excuse me, how can the animal convey your message?—how +communicate what he knows, if he does understand what you say to him?”</p> + +<p>“He will at least take care that the housekeeper look in his mane for +the knot which perhaps you did not observe me tie in it.”</p> + +<p>“You have a code of signals by knots then?”</p> + +<p>“Yes—comprising about half a dozen possibilities.—I hope you do not +object to the message I sent! You will do me the honour of lunching +with me?”</p> + +<p>“You are most kind,” I answered—with a little hesitation, I suppose, +fearing to bore my new acquaintance.</p> + +<p>“Don’t make me false to horse and housekeeper, Mr. Gowrie,” he +resumed.—“I put the horse first, because I could more easily explain +the thing to Mrs. Waterhouse than to Memnon.”</p> + +<p>“Could you explain it to Memnon?”</p> + +<p>“I should have a try!” he answered, with a peculiar smile.</p> + +<p>“You hold yourself bound then to keep faith with your horse?”</p> + +<p>“Bound just as with a man—that is, as far as the horse can understand +me. A word understood is binding, whether spoken to horse, or man, or +pig. It makes it the more important that we can do so little, must +work so slowly, for the education of the lower animals. It seems to me +an absolute horror that a man should lie to an inferior creature. Just +think—if an angel were to lie to us! What a shock to find we had been +reposing faith in a devil.”</p> + +<p>“Excuse me—I thought you said <i>an angel</i>!”</p> + +<p>“When he lied, would he not be a devil?—But let us follow Memnon, and +as we walk I will tell you more about him.”</p> + +<p>He turned to the wood.</p> + +<p>“The horse,” I said, pointing, “went that way!”</p> + +<p>“Yes,” answered his master; “he knew it was nearer for him to take the +long way round. If I had started him and one of the dogs together, the +horse would have gone that way, and the dog taken the path we are now +following.”</p> + +<p>We walked a score or two of yards in silence.</p> + +<p>“You promised to tell me more about your wonderful horse!” I said.</p> + +<p>“With pleasure. I delight in talking about my poor brothers and +sisters! Most of them are only savages yet, but there would be far +fewer such if we did not treat them as slaves instead of friends. One +day, however, all will be well for them as for us—thank God.”</p> + +<p>“I hope so,” I responded heartily. “But please tell me,” I said, +“something more about your Memnon.”</p> + +<p>Mr. Skymer thought for a moment.</p> + +<p>“Perhaps, after all,” he rejoined, “his best accomplishment is that he +can fetch and carry like a dog. I will tell you one of his feats that +way. But first you must know that, having travelled a good deal, and +in some wild countries, I have picked up things it is well to know, +even if not the best of their kind. A man may fail by not knowing the +second best! I was once out on Memnon, five and twenty miles from +home, when I came to a cottage where I found a woman lying ill. I saw +what was wanted. The country was strange to me, and I could not have +found a doctor. I wrote a little pencil-note, fastened it to the +saddle, and told the horse to go home and bring me what the +housekeeper gave him—and not to spare himself. He went off at a +steady trot of ten or twelve miles an hour. I went into the cottage, +and, awaiting his return, did what I could for the woman. I confess I +felt anxious!”</p> + +<p>“You well might,” I said: “why should you say <i>confess</i>?”</p> + +<p>“Because I had no business to be anxious.”</p> + +<p>“It was your business to do all for her you could.”</p> + +<p>“I was doing that! If I hadn’t been, I should have had good cause to +be anxious! But I knew that another was looking after her; and to be +anxious was to meddle with his part!”</p> + +<p>“I see now,” I answered, and said nothing more for some time.</p> + +<p>“What a lather poor Memnon came back in! You should have seen him! He +had been gone nearly five hours, and neither time nor distance +accounted for the state he was in. I did not let him do anything for a +week. I should have had to sit up with him that night, if I had not +been sitting up at any rate. The poor fellow had been caught, and had +made his escape. His bridle was broken, and there were several long +skin wounds in his belly, as if he had scraped the top of a wall set +with bits of glass. How far he had galloped, there was no telling.”</p> + +<p>“Not in vain, I hope! The poor woman?”</p> + +<p>“She recovered. The medicine was all right in a pocket under the flap +of the saddle. Before morning she was much better, and lived many +years after. Memnon and I did not lose sight of her.—But you should +have seen the huge creature lying on the floor of that cabin like a +worn-out dog, abandoned and content! I rubbed him down carefully, as +well as I could, and tied my poncho round him, before I let him go to +sleep. Then as soon as my patient seemed quieted for the night, I made +up a big fire of her peats, and they slept like two babies, only they +both snored.—The woman beat,” he added with a merry laugh. “It was +the first, almost the only time I ever heard a horse snore.—As we +walked home next day he kept steadily behind me. In general we walked +side by side. Either he felt too tired to talk to me, or he was not +satisfied with himself because of something that had happened the day +before. Perhaps he had been careless, and so allowed himself to be +taken. I do not think it likely.”</p> + +<p>“What a loss it will be to you when he dies!” I said.</p> + +<p>He looked grave for an instant, then replied cheerfully—</p> + +<p>“Of course I shall miss the dear fellow—but not more than he will +miss me; and it will be good for us both.”</p> + +<p>“Then,” said I,—a little startled, I confess, “you really think—” +and there I stopped.</p> + +<p>“Do <i>you</i> think, Mr. Gowrie,” he rejoined, answering my unpropounded +question, “that a God like Jesus Christ, would invent such a delight +for his children as the society and love of animals, and then let +death part them for ever? I don’t.”</p> + +<p>“I am heartily willing to be your disciple in the matter,” I replied.</p> + +<p>“I know well,” he resumed, “the vulgar laugh that serves the poor +public for sufficient answer to anything, and the common-place retort: +‘You can’t give a shadow of proof for your theory!’—to which I +answer, ‘I never was the fool to imagine I could; but as surely as you +go to bed at night expecting to rise again in the morning, so surely +do I expect to see my dear old Memnon again when I wake from what so +many Christians call the sleep that knows no waking.’—Think, +Mr. Gowrie, just think of all the children in heaven—what a +superabounding joy the creatures would be to them!—There is one +class, however,” he went on, “which I should like to see wait a while +before they got their creatures back;—I mean those foolish women who, +for their own pleasure, so spoil their dogs that they make other +people hate them, doing their best to keep them from rising in the +scale of God’s creation.”</p> + +<p>“They don’t know better!” I said. For every time he stopped, I wanted +to hear what he would say next.</p> + +<p>“True,” he answered; “but how much do they want to know the right way +of anything? They have good and lovely instincts—like their dogs, but +do they care that there is a right way and a wrong way of following +them?”</p> + +<p>We walked in silence, and were now coming near the other side of the +small wood.</p> + +<p>“I hope I shall not interfere with your plans for the day!” I said.</p> + +<p>“I seldom have any plans for the day,” he answered. “Or if I have, +they are made to break easily. In general I wait. The hour brings its +plans with it—comes itself to tell me what is wanted of me. It has +done so now. And see, there is Memnon again in attendance on us!”</p> + +<p>There, sure enough, was the horse, on the other side of the paling +that here fenced the wood from a well-kept country-road. His long neck +was stretched over it toward his master.</p> + +<p>“Memnon,” said Mr. Skymer as we issued by the gate, “I want you to +carry this gentleman home.”</p> + +<p>I had often enough in my youth ridden without a saddle, but seldom +indeed without some sort of bridle, however inadequate: I did not, at +the first thought of the thing, relish mounting without one a horse of +which all I knew was that he and his master were on better terms than +I had ever seen man and horse upon before. But even while the thought +was passing through my head, Memnon was lying at my feet, flat as his +equine rotundity would permit. Ashamed of my doubt, I lost not a +moment in placing myself in the position suggested by Sir John +Falstaff to Prince Hal for the defence of his own bulky +carcase—astride the body of the animal, namely. At once he rose and +lifted me into the natural relation of man and horse. Then he looked +round at his master, and they set off at a leisurely pace.</p> + +<p>“You have me captive!” I said.</p> + +<p>“Memnon and I,” answered Mr. Skymer, “will do what we can to make your +captivity pleasant.”</p> + +<p>A silence followed my thanks. In this procession of horse and foot, we +went about half a mile ere anything more was said worth setting +down. Then began evidence that we were drawing nigh to a house: the +grassy lane between hedges in which we had been moving, was gradually +changing its character. First came trees in the hedge-rows. Then the +hedges gave way to trees—a grand avenue of splendid elms and beeches +alternated. The ground under our feet was the loveliest sward, and +between us and the sun came the sweetest shadow. A glad heave but +instant subsidence of the live power under me, let me know Memnon’s +delight at feeling the soft elastic turf under his feet: he had said +to himself, “Now we shall have a gallop!” but immediately checked the +thought with the reflection that he was no longer a colt ignorant of +manners.</p> + +<p>“What a lovely road the turf makes!” I said. “It is a lower +sky—solidified for feet that are not yet angelic.”</p> + +<p>My host looked up with a brighter smile than he had shown before.</p> + +<p>“It is the only kind of road I really like,” he said, “—though turf +has its disadvantages! I have as much of it about the place as it will +bear. Such roads won’t do for carriages!”</p> + +<p>“You ride a good deal, I suppose?”</p> + +<p>“I do. I was at one time so accustomed to horseback that, without +thinking, I was not aware whether I was on my horse’s feet or my own.”</p> + +<p>“Where, may I ask, does my friend who is now doing me the favour to +carry ‘this weight and size,’ come from?”</p> + +<p>“He was born in England, but his mother was a Syrian—of one of the +oldest breeds there known. He was born into my arms, and for a week +never touched the ground. Next month, as I think I mentioned, he will +be forty years old!”</p> + +<p>“It is a great age for a horse!” I said.</p> + +<p>“The more the shame as well as the pity!” he answered.</p> + +<p>“Then you think horses might live longer?”</p> + +<p>“Much longer than they are allowed to live in this country,” he +answered. “And a part of our punishment is that we do not know +them. We treat them so selfishly that they do not live long enough to +become our friends. At present there are but few men worthy of their +friendship. What else is a man’s admiration, when it is without love +or respect or justice, but a bitter form of despite! It is small +wonder there should be so many stupid horses, when they receive so +little education, have such bad associates, and die so much too young +to have gained any ripe experience to transmit to their +posterity. Where would humanity be now, if we all went before +five-and-twenty?”</p> + +<p>“I think you must be right. I have myself in my possession at this +moment, given me by one who loved her, an ink-stand made from the hoof +of a pony that died at the age of at least forty-two, and did her part +of the work of a pair till within a year or two of her death.—Poor +little Zephyr!”</p> + +<p>“Why, Mr. Gowrie, you talk of her as if she were a Christian!” +exclaimed Mr. Skymer.</p> + +<p>“That’s how you talked of Memnon a moment ago! Where is the +difference? Not in the size, though Memnon would make three of +Zephyr!”</p> + +<p>“I didn’t say <i>poor Memnon</i>, did I? You said <i>poor Zephyr</i>! That is +the way Christians talk about their friends gone home to the grand old +family mansion! Why they do, they would hardly like one to tell them!”</p> + +<p>“It is true,” I responded. “I understand you now! I don’t think I ever +heard a widow speak of her departed husband without putting <i>poor</i>, or +<i>poor dear</i>, before his name.—By the way, when you hear a woman speak +of her <i>late</i> husband, can you help thinking her ready to marry +again?”</p> + +<p>“It does sound as if she had done with him! But here we are at the +gate!—Call, Memnon.”</p> + +<p>The horse gave a clear whinny, gentle, but loud enough to be heard at +some distance. It was a tall gate of wrought iron, but Memnon’s +summons was answered by one who could clear it—though not open it any +more than he: a little bird, which I was not ornithologist enough to +recognize—mainly because of my short-sightedness, I hope—came +fluttering from the long avenue within, perched on the top of the +gate, looked down at our party for a moment as if debating the +prudent, dropped suddenly on Memnon’s left ear, and thence to his +master’s shoulder, where he sat till the gate was opened. The little +one went half-way up the inner avenue with us, making several flights +and returns before he left us.</p> + +<p>The boy that opened the gate, a chubby little fellow of seven, looked +up in Mr. Skymer’s face as if he had been his father and king in one, +and stood gazing after him as long as he was in sight. I noticed +also—who could have failed to notice?—that every now and then a bird +would drop from the tree we were passing under, and alight for a +minute on my host’s head. Once when he happened to uncover it, seven +or eight perched together upon it. One tiny bird got caught in his +beard by the claws.</p> + +<p>“You cannot surely have tamed <i>all</i> the birds in your grounds!” I +said.</p> + +<p>“If I have,” he answered, “it has been by permitting them to be +themselves.”</p> + +<p>“You mean it is the nature of birds to be friendly with man?”</p> + +<p>“I do. Through long ages men have been their enemies, and so have +alienated them—they too not being themselves.”</p> + +<p>“You mean that unfriendliness is not natural to men?”</p> + +<p>“It cannot be human to be cruel!”</p> + +<p>“How is it, then, that so many boys are careless what suffering they +inflict?”</p> + +<p>“Because they have in them the blood of men who loved cruelty, and +never repented of it.”</p> + +<p>“But how do you account for those men loving cruelty—for their being +what you say is contrary to their nature?”</p> + +<p>“Ah, if I could account for that, I should be at the secret of most +things! All I meant to half-explain was, how it came that so many who +have no wish to inflict suffering, yet are careless of inflicting it.”</p> + +<p>I saw that we must know each other better before he would quite open +his mind to me. I saw that though, hospitable of heart, he threw his +best rooms open to all, there were others in his house into which he +did not invite every acquaintance.</p> + +<p>The avenue led to a wide gravelled space before a plain, low, long +building in whitish stone, with pillared portico. In the middle of the +space was a fountain, and close to it a few chairs. Mr. Skymer begged +me to be seated. Memnon walked up to the fountain, and lay down, that +I might get off his back as easily as I had got on it. Once down, he +turned on his side, and lay still.</p> + +<p>“The air is so mild,” said my host, “I fancy you will prefer this to +the house.”</p> + +<p>“Mild!” I rejoined; “I should call it hot!”</p> + +<p>“I have been so much in real heat!” he returned. “Notwithstanding my +love of turf, I keep this much in gravel for the sake of the desert.”</p> + +<p>I took the seat he offered me, wondering whether Memnon was +comfortable where he lay; and, absorbed in the horse, did not see my +host go to the other side of the basin. Suddenly we were “clothed +upon” with a house which, though it came indeed from the earth, might +well have come direct from heaven: a great uprush of water spread +above us a tent-like dome, through which the sun came with a cool, +broken, almost frosty glitter. We seemed in the heart of a huge +soap-bubble. I exclaimed with delight.</p> + +<p>“I thought you would enjoy my sun-shade!” said Mr. Skymer. “Memnon and +I often come here of a hot morning, when nobody wants us. Don’t we, +Memnon?”</p> + +<p>The horse lifted his nose a little, and made a low soft noise, a chord +of mingled obedience and delight—a moan of pleasure mixed with a +half-born whinny.</p> + +<p>We had not been seated many moments, and had scarcely pushed off the +shore of silence into a new sea of talk, when we were interrupted by +the invasion of half a dozen dogs. They were of all sorts down to no +sort. Mr. Skymer called one of them Tadpole—I suppose because he had +the hugest tail, while his legs were not visible without being looked +for.</p> + +<p>“That animal,” said his master, “—he looks like a dog, but who would +be positive what he was!—is the cleverest in the pack. He seems to me +a rare individuality. His ancestors must have been of all sorts, and +he has gathered from them every good quality possessed by each. Think +what a man might be—made up that way!”</p> + +<p>“Why is there no such man?” I said.</p> + +<p>“There may be some such men. There must be many one day,” he answered, +“—but not for a while yet. Men must first be made willing to be +noble.”</p> + +<p>“And you don’t think men willing to be made noble?”</p> + +<p>“Oh yes! willing enough, some of them, to be <i>made</i> noble!”</p> + +<p>“I do not understand. I thought you said they were not!”</p> + +<p>“They are willing enough <i>to be made</i> noble; but that is very +different from being willing <i>to be</i> noble: that takes trouble. How +can any one become noble who desires it so little as not to fight for +it!”</p> + +<p>The man drew me more and more. He had a way of talking about things +seldom mentioned except in dull fashion in the pulpit, as if he cared +about them. He spoke as of familiar things, but made you feel he was +looking out of a high window. There are many who never speak of real +things except in a false tone; this man spoke of such without an atom +of assumed solemnity—in his ordinary voice: they came into his mind +as to their home—not as dreams of the night, but as facts of the day.</p> + +<p>I sat for a while, gazing up through the thin veil of water at the +blue sky so far beyond. I thought how like that veil was to our little +life here, overdomed by that boundless foreshortening of space. The +lines in Shelley’s <i>Adonais</i> came to me:</p> + +<p class="poetry"> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">“Life, like a dome of many-coloured glass,</span><br> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Stains the white radiance of Eternity,</span><br> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Until Death tramples it to fragments.”</span><br> +</p> + +<p>Then I thought of what my host had said concerning the too short lives +of horses, and wondered what he would say about those of dogs.</p> + +<p>“Dogs are more intelligent than horses,” I said: “why do they live a +yet shorter time?”</p> + +<p>“I doubt if you would say so in an Arab’s tent,” he returned. “If you +had said, ‘still more affectionate,’ I should have known better how to +answer you.”</p> + +<p>“Then I do say so,” I replied.</p> + +<p>“And I return, that is just why they live no longer. They do not find +the world good enough for them, die, and leave it.”</p> + +<p>“They have a much happier life than horses!”</p> + +<p>“Many dogs than some horses, I grant.”</p> + +<p>That instant arose what I fancied must be an unusual sound in the +place: two of the dogs were fighting. The master got up. I thought +with myself, “Now we shall see his notions of discipline!” nor had I +long to wait. In his hand was a small riding-whip, which I afterward +found he always carried in avoidance of having to inflict a heavier +punishment from inability to inflict a lighter; for he held that, in +all wrong-doing man can deal with, the kindest thing is not only to +punish, but, with animals especially, to punish at once. He ran to the +conflicting parties. They separated the moment they heard the sound of +his coming. One came cringing and crawling to his feet; the other—it +was the nondescript Tadpole—stood a little way off, wagging his tail, +and cocking his head up in his master’s face. He gave the one at his +feet several pretty severe cuts with the whip, and sent him off. The +other drew nearer. His master turned away and took no notice of him.</p> + +<p>“May I ask,” I said, when he returned to his seat, “why you did not +punish both the animals for their breach of the peace?”</p> + +<p>“They did not both deserve it.”</p> + +<p>“How could you tell that? You were not looking when the quarrel +began!”</p> + +<p>“Ah, but you see I know the dogs! One of them—I saw at a glance how +it was—had found a bone, and dog-rule about finding is, that what you +find is yours. The other, notwithstanding, wanted a share. It was +Tadpole who found the bone, and he—partly from his sense of +justice—cannot endure to have his claims infringed upon. Every dog of +them knows that Tadpole must be in the right.”</p> + +<p>“He looked as if he expected you to approve of his conduct!”</p> + +<p>“Yes, that is the worst of Tadpole! he is so self-righteous as to +imagine he deserves praise for standing on his rights! He is but a +dog, you see, and knows no better!”</p> + +<p>“I noticed you disregarded his appeal.”</p> + +<p>“I was not going to praise him for nothing!”</p> + +<p>“You expect them to understand your treatment?”</p> + +<p>“No one can tell how infinitesimally small the beginnings of +understanding, as of life, may be. The only way to make animals +reasonable—more reasonable, I mean—is to treat them as +reasonable. Until you can go down into the abysses of creation, you +cannot know when a nature begins to see a difference in quality +of action.”</p> + +<p>“I confess,” I said, “Mr. Tadpole did seem a little ashamed as he went +away.”</p> + +<p>“And you see Blanco White at my feet, taking care not to touch +them. He is giving time, he thinks, for my anger to pass.”</p> + +<p>He laughed the merriest laugh. The dog looked up eagerly, but dropped +his head again.</p> + +<p>If I go on like this, however, I shall have to take another book to +tell the story for which I began the present! In short, I was drawn to +the man as never to another since the friend of my youth went where I +shall go to seek and find him one day—or, more likely, one solemn +night. I was greatly his inferior, but love is a quick divider of +shares: he that gathers much has nothing over, and he that gathers +little has no lack. I soon ceased to think of him as my <i>new</i> friend, +for I seemed to have known him before I was born.</p> + +<p>I am going to tell the early part of his history. If only I could tell +it as it deserves to be told! The most interesting story may be so +narrated as that only the eyes of a Shakspere could spy the shine +underneath its dull surface.</p> + +<p>He never told me any great portion of the tale of his life +continuously. One thing would suggest another—generally with no +connection in time. I have pieced the parts together myself. He did +indeed set out more than once or twice to give me his history, but +always we got discussing something, and so it was interrupted.</p> + +<p>I will not write what I have set in order as if he were himself +narrating: the most modest man in the world would that way be put at a +disadvantage. The constant recurrence of the capital <i>I</i>, is apt to +rouse in the mind of the reader, especially if he be himself +egotistic, more or less of irritation at the egotism of the +narrator—while in reality the freedom of a man’s personal utterance +<i>may</i> be owing to his lack of the egotistic. Partly for my +friend’s sake, therefore, I shall tell the story as—what indeed it +is—a narrative of my own concerning him.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_II">Chapter II.<br><span class="smcap">With his Parents.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>The lingering, long-drawn-out <i>table d’hôte</i> dinner was just over in +one of the inns on the <i>cornice</i> road. The gentlemen had gone into the +garden, and some of the ladies to the <i>salotto</i>, where open windows +admitted the odours of many a flower and blossoming tree, for it was +toward the end of spring in that region. One had sat down to a +tinkling piano, and was striking a few chords, more to her own +pleasure than that of the company. Two or three were looking out into +the garden, where the diaphanous veil of twilight had so speedily +thickened to the crape of night, its darkness filled with thousands of +small isolated splendours—fire-flies, those “golden boats” never seen +“on a sunny sea,” but haunting the eves of the young summer, pulsing, +pulsing through the dusky air with seeming aimlessness, like sweet +thoughts that have no faith to bind them in one. A tall, graceful +woman stood in one of the windows alone. She had never been in Italy +before, had never before seen fire-flies, and was absorbed in the +beauty of their motion as much as in that of their golden +flashes. Each roving star had a tide in its light that rose and ebbed +as it moved, so that it seemed to push itself on by its own radiance, +ever waxing and waning. In wide, complicated dance, they wove a huge, +warpless tapestry with the weft of an ever vanishing aureate +shine. The lady, an Englishwoman evidently, gave a little sigh and +looked round, regretting, apparently, that her husband was not by her +side to look on the loveliness that woke a faint-hued fairy-tale in +her heart. The same moment he entered the room and came to her. He was +a man above the middle height, and from the slenderness of his figure, +looked taller than he was. He had a vivacity of motion, a readiness to +turn on his heel, a free swing of the shoulders, and an erect carriage +of the head, which all marked him a man of action: one that speculated +on his calling would immediately have had his sense of fitness +satisfied when he heard that he was the commander of an English +gun-boat, which he was now on his way to Genoa to join. He was +young—within the twenties, though looking two or three and thirty, +his face was so browned by sun and wind. His features were regular and +attractive, his eyes so dark that the liveliness of their movement +seemed hardly in accord with the weight of their colour. His wife was +very fair, with large eyes of the deepest blue of eyes. She looked +delicate, and was very lovely. They had been married about five +years. A friend had brought them in his yacht as far as Nice, and they +were now going on by land. From Genoa the lady must find her way home +without her husband.</p> + +<p>The lights in the room having been extinguished that the few present +might better see the fire-flies, he put his arm round her waist.</p> + +<p>“I’m so glad you’re come, Henry!” she said, favoured by the piano. “I +was uncomfortable at having the lovely sight all to myself!”</p> + +<p>“It is lovely, darling!” he rejoined; then, after a moment’s pause, +added, “I hope you will be able to sleep without the sea to rock you!”</p> + +<p>“No fear of that!” she answered. “The stillness will be delightful. I +was thoroughly reconciled to the motion of the yacht,” she went on, +“but there is a satisfaction in feeling the solid earth under you, and +knowing it will keep steady all night.”</p> + +<p>“I am glad you like the change. I never sleep the first night on +shore.—I cannot tell what it is, but somehow I keep wishing Fyvie +could have taken us all the way.”</p> + +<p>“Never mind, love. I will keep awake with you.”</p> + +<p>“It’s not that! How could I mind lying awake with you beside me! Oh +Grace, you don’t know, you cannot know, what you are to me! I don’t +feel in the least that you’re my other half, as people say. You’re not +like a part of myself at all; to think so would be sacrilege! You are +quite another, else how could you be mine! You make me forget myself +altogether. When I look at you, I stand before an enchanted mirror +that cannot show what is in front of it.”</p> + +<p>“No, Harry; I’m a true mirror, for I hold that inside me which remains +outside me.”</p> + +<p>“I fear you’ve got beyond me!” said her husband, laughing. “You always +do!”</p> + +<p>“Yes, at nonsense, Harry.”</p> + +<p>“Then your speech was nonsense, was it?”</p> + +<p>“No; it was full of sense. But think of something you would like me to +say; I must fetch the boy to see the fire-flies; when I come back I +will say it.”</p> + +<p>She left the room. Her husband stood where he was, gazing out, with a +tender look in his face that deepened to sadness—whether from the +haunting thought of his wife’s delicate health and his having to leave +her, or from some strange foreboding, I cannot tell. When presently +she returned with their one child in her arms, he made haste to take +him from her.</p> + +<p>“My darling,” he said, “he is much too heavy for you! How stupid of me +not to think of it! If you don’t promise me never to do that at home, +I will take him to sea with me!”</p> + +<p>The child, a fair, bright boy, the sleep in whose eyes had turned to +wonder, for they seemed to see everything, and be quite satisfied with +nothing, went readily to his father, but looked back at his +mother. The only sign he gave that he was delighted with the +fire-flies was, that he looked now to the one, now to the other of his +parents, speechless, with shining eyes. He knew they were feeling just +like himself. Silent communion was enough.</p> + +<p>The father turned to carry him back to bed. The mother turned to look +after them. As she did so, her eyes fell upon two or three delicate, +small-leaved plants—I do not know what they were—that stood in pots +on the balcony in front of the open window: they were shivering. The +night was perfectly still, but their leaves trembled as with an +ague-fit.</p> + +<p>“Look, Harry! What is that?” she cried, pointing to them.</p> + +<p>He turned and looked, said it must be some loaded wagon passing, and +went off with the child.</p> + +<p>“I hope to-morrow will be just like to-day!” said his wife when he +returned. “What shall we do with it?—our one real holiday, you know!”</p> + +<p>“I have a notion in my head,” he answered. “That little town Georgina +spoke of, is not far from here—among the hills: shall we go and see +it?”</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_III">Chapter III.<br><span class="smcap">Without his Parents.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>The sun in England seems to shine because he cannot help it; the sun +in Italy seems to shine because he means it, and wants to mean +it. Thus he shone the next morning, including in his attentions a +curious little couple, husband and wife, who, attended by a guide, and +borne by animals which might be mules and might be donkeys, and were +not lovely to look on except through sympathy with their ugliness, +were slowly ascending a steep terraced and zigzagged road, with olive +trees above and below them. They were on the south side of the hill, +and the olives gave them none of the little shadow they have in their +power, for the trees next the sun were always below the road. The man +often wiped his red, innocent face, and looked not a little +distressed; but the lady, although as stout as he, did not seem to +suffer, perhaps because she was sheltered by a very large bonnet. After +a silence of a good many minutes, she was the first to speak.</p> + +<p>“I can’t say but I’m disappointed in the olives, Thomas,” she +remarked. “They ain’t much to keep the sun off you!”</p> + +<p>“They wouldn’t look bad along a brookside in Essex!” returned her +husband. “Here they do seem a bit out of place!”</p> + +<p>“Well, but, poor things! how are they to help it—with only a trayful +of earth under their feet! If you planted a priest on a terrace he +would soon be as thin as they!”</p> + +<p>They had just passed a very stout priest, in a low broad hat, and +cassock, and she laughed merrily at her small joke. They were an +English country parson and his wife, abroad for the first time in +their now middle-aged lives, and happy as children just out of +school. Incapable of disliking anybody, there was no unkindness in +Mrs. Porson’s laughter.</p> + +<p>“I don’t see,” she resumed, “how they ever can have a picnic in such a +country!”</p> + +<p>“Why not?”</p> + +<p>“There’s no place to sit down!”</p> + +<p>“Here’s a whole hill-side!”</p> + +<p>“But so hard!” she answered. “There’s not an inch of turf or grass in +any direction!”</p> + +<p>The pair—equally plump, and equally good-natured—laughed together.</p> + +<p>I need not give more of their talk. It was better than most talk, yet +not worth recording. Their guide, perceiving that they knew no more of +Italian than he did of English, had withdrawn to the rear, and stumped +along behind them all the way, holding much converse with his donkeys, +however, admonishing now this one, now that one, and seeming not a +little hurt with their behaviour, to judge from the expostulations +that accompanied his occasionally more potent arguments. Assuredly the +speed they made was small; but it was a festa, and hot.</p> + +<p>They were on the way to a small town some distance from the shore, on +the crest of the hill they were now ascending. It would, from the +number of its inhabitants, have been in England a village, but there +are no villages in the Riviera. However insignificant a place may be, +it is none the less a town, possibly a walled town. Somebody had told +Mr. and Mrs. Porson they ought to visit Graffiacane, and to +Graffiacane they were therefore bound: why they ought to visit it, and +what was to be seen there, they took the readiest way to know.</p> + +<p>The place was indeed a curious one, high among the hills, and on the +top of its own hill, with approaches to it like the trenches of a +siege. All the old towns in that region seem to have climbed up to +look over the heads of other things. Graffiacane saw over hills and +valleys and many another town—each with its church standing highest, +the guardian of the flock of houses beneath it; saw over many a +water-course, mostly dry, with lovely oleanders growing in the middle +of it; saw over multitudinous oliveyards and vineyards; saw over mills +with great wheels, and little ribbons of water to drive them—running +sometimes along the tops of walls to get at their work; saw over +rugged pines, and ugly, verdureless, raw hillsides—away to the sea, +lying in the heat like a heavenly vat in which all the tails of all +the peacocks God was making, lay steeped in their proper dye. Numerous +were the sharp turns the donkeys made in their ascent; and at this +corner and that, the sweetest life-giving wind would leap out upon the +travellers, as if it had been lying there in wait to surprise them +with the heavenliest the old earth, young for all her years, could +give them. But they were getting too tired to enjoy anything, and were +both indeed not far from asleep on the backs of their humble beasts, +when a sudden, more determined yet more cheerful assault of their +guide upon his donkeys, roused both them and their riders; and looking +sleepily up, with his loud <i>heeoop</i> ringing in their ears, and a sense +of the insidious approach of two headaches, they saw before them the +little town, its houses gathered close for protection, like a brood of +chickens, and the white steeple of the church rising above them, like +the neck of the love-valiant hen.</p> + +<p>Passing through the narrow arch of the low-browed gateway, hot as was +the hour, a sudden cold struck to their bones. For not a ray of light +shone into the narrow street. The houses were lofty as those of a +city, and parted so little by the width of the street that friends on +opposite sides might almost from their windows have shaken +hands. Narrow, rough, steep old stone-stairs ran up between and inside +the houses, all the doors of which were open to the air—here, +however, none of the sweetest. Everywhere was shadow; everywhere, one +or another evil odour; everywhere a look of abject and dirty +poverty—to an English eye, that is. Everywhere were pretty children, +young, slatternly mothers, withered-up grandmothers, the gleam of +glowing reds and yellows, and the coolness of subdued greens and fine +blues. Such at least was the composite first impression made on Mr. +and Mrs. Porson. As it was a festa, more men than usual were looking +out of cavern-like doorways or over hand-wrought iron balconies, were +leaning their backs against door-posts, and smoking as if too lazy to +stop. Many of the women were at prayers in the church. All was +orderly, and quieter than usual for a festa. None could have told the +reason; the townsfolk were hardly aware that an undefinable oppression +was upon them—an oppression that lay also upon their visitors, and +the donkeys that had toiled with them up the hills and slow-climbing +valleys.</p> + +<p>It added to the gloom and consequent humidity of the town that the +sides of the streets were connected, at the height of two or perhaps +three stories, by thin arches—mere jets of stone from the one house +to the other, with but in rare instance the smallest superstructure to +keep down the key of the arch. Whatever the intention of them, they +might seem to serve it, for the time they had straddled there +undisturbed had sufficed for moss and even grass to grow upon those +which Mr. Porson now regarded with curious speculation. A bit of an +architect, and foiled, he summoned at last what Italian he could, +supplemented it with Latin and a terminational <i>o</i> or <i>a</i> tacked to +any French or English word that offered help, and succeeded, as he +believed, in gathering from a by-stander, that the arches were there +because of the earthquakes.</p> + +<p>He had not language enough of any sort to pursue the matter, else he +would have asked his informant how the arch they were looking at could +be of any service, seeing it had no weight on the top, and but a +slight endlong pressure must burst it up. Turning away to tell his +wife what he had learned, he was checked by a low rumbling, like +distant thunder, which he took for the firing of festa guns, having +discovered that Italians were fond of all kinds of noises. The next +instant they felt the ground under their feet move up and down and +from side to side with confused motion. A sudden great cry arose. One +moment and down every stair, out of every door, like animals from +their holes, came men, women, and children, with a rush. The +earthquake was upon them.</p> + +<p>But in such narrow streets, the danger could hardly be less than +inside the houses, some of which, the older especially, were ill +constructed—mostly with boulder-stones that had neither angles nor +edges, hence little grasp on each other beyond what the friction of +their weight, and the adhesion of their poor old friable cement, gave +them; for the Italians, with a genius for building, are careless of +certain constructive essentials. After about twenty seconds of +shaking, the lonely pair began to hear, through the noise of the cries +of the people, some such houses as these rumbling to the earth.</p> + +<p>They were far more bewildered than frightened. They were both of good +nerve, and did not know the degree of danger they were in, while the +strangeness of the thing contributed to an excitement that helped +their courage. I cannot say how they might have behaved in an hotel +full of their countrymen and countrywomen, running and shrieking, and +altogether comporting themselves as if they knew there was no God. The +fear on all sides might there have infected them; but the terror of +the inhabitants who knew better than they what the thing meant, did +not much shake them. For one moment many of the people stood in the +street motionless, pale, and staring; the next they all began to run, +some for the gateway, but the greater part up the street, staggering +as they ran. The movement of the ground was indeed small—not more, +perhaps, than half an inch in any direction—but fear and imagination +weakened all their limbs. They had not run far, however, before the +terrible unrest ceased as suddenly as it had begun.</p> + +<p>The English pair drew a long breath where they stood—for they had not +stirred a step, or indeed thought whither to run—and imagining it +over for a hundred years, looked around them. Their guide had +disappeared. The two donkeys stood perfectly still with their heads +hanging down. They seemed in deep dejection, and incapable of +movement. A few men only were yet to be seen. They were running up the +street. In a moment more it would be empty. They were the last of +those that had let the women go to church without them. They were +hurrying to join them in the sanctuary, the one safe place: the rest +of the town might be shaken in heaps on its foundations, but the +church would stand! Guessing their goal, the Porsons followed +them. But they were neither of a build nor in a condition to make +haste, and the road was uphill. No one place, however, was far from +another within the toy-town, and they came presently to an open +<i>piazza</i>, on the upper side of which rose the great church. It had a +square front, masking with its squareness the triangular gable of the +building. Upon this screen, in the brightest of colours, magenta and +sky-blue predominating, was represented the day of judgment—the +mother seated on the right hand of the judge, and casting a pitiful +look upon the miserable assembly on her left. The square was a good +deal on the slope, and as they went slowly up to the church, they kept +looking at the picture. The last tatters of the skirt of the crowd had +disappeared through the great door, and but for themselves the square +was empty. All at once the picture at which they were gazing, the +spread of wall on which it was painted, the whole bulk of the huge +building began to shudder, and went on shuddering—“just,” Mr. Porson +used to say when describing the thing to a friend, “like the skin of a +horse determined to get rid of a gad-fly.” The same moment the tiles +on the roof began to clatter like so many castanets in the hands of +giants, and the ground to wriggle and heave. But they were too much +absorbed in what was before their eyes to heed much what went on under +their feet. The oscillatory displacement of the front of the church +did not at most seem to cover more than a hand-breadth, but it was +enough. Down came the plaster surface, with the judge and his mother, +clashing on the pavement below, while the good and the bad yet stood +trembling. A few of the people came running out, thinking the open +square after all safer than the church, but there was no rush to the +open air. The shaking had lasted about twenty seconds, or at most half +a minute, when, without indication to the eyes watching the front, +there came a roaring crash and a huge rumbling, through and far above +which, rose a multitudinous shriek of terror, dismay, and agony, and a +number of men and women issued as if shot from a catapult. Then a few +came straggling out, and then—no more. The roof had fallen upon the +rest.</p> + +<p>With the first rush from the church, the shaking ceased utterly, and +the still earth seemed again the immovable thing the English +spectators had conceived her. Of what had taken place there was little +sign on the earth, no sign in the blue sun-glorious heaven; only in +the air there was a cloud of dust so thick as to look almost solid, +and from the cloud, as it seemed, came a ghastly cry, mingled of +shrieks and groans and articulate appeals for help. The cry kept on +issuing, while the calm front of the church, dominated by that +frightful canopy, went on displaying the assembled nations delivered +from their awful judge. While the multitude groaned within, it spread +itself out to the sun in silent composure, welcoming and cherishing +his rays in what was left of its gorgeous hues.</p> + +<p>The Porsons stood for a moment stunned, came to their senses, and made +haste to enter the building. With white faces and trembling hands, +they drew aside the heavy leather curtain that hung within the great +door, but could for a moment see nothing; the air inside seemed filled +with a solid yellow dust. As their eyes recovered from the sudden +change of sunlight for gloom, however, they began to distinguish the +larger outlines, and perceived that the floor was one confused heap of +rafters and bricks and tiles and stones and lime. The centre of the +roof had been a great dome; now there was nothing between their eyes +and the clear heaven but the slowly vanishing cloud of ruin. In the +mound below they could at first distinguish nothing human—could not +have told, in the dim chaos, limbs from broken rafters. Eager to help, +they dared not set their feet upon the mass—not that they feared the +walls which another shock might bring upon their heads, but that they +shuddered lest their own added weight should crush some live human +creature they could not descry. Three or four who had received little +or no hurt, were moving about the edges of the heap, vaguely trying to +lift now this, now that, but yielding each attempt in despair, either +from its evident uselessness, or for lack of energy. They would give a +pull at a beam that lay across some writhing figure, find it +immovable, and turn with a groan to some farther cry. How or where +were they to help? Others began to come in with white faces and +terror-stricken eyes; and before long the sepulchral ruin had little +groups all over it, endeavouring in shiftless fashion to bring rescue +to the prisoned souls.</p> + +<p>The Porsons saw nothing they could do. Great beams and rafters which +it was beyond their power to move an inch, lay crossed in all +directions; and they could hold little communication with those who +were in a fashion at work. Alas, they were little better than vainly +busy, while the louder moans accompanying their attempts revealed that +they added to the tortures of those they sought to deliver! The two +saw more plainly now, and could distinguish contorted limbs, and here +and there a countenance. The silence, more and more seldom broken, was +growing itself terrible. Had they known how many were buried there, +they would have wondered so few were left able to cry out. At moments +there was absolute stillness in the dreadful place. The heart of +Mrs. Porson began to sink.</p> + +<p>“Do come out,” she whispered, afraid of her own voice. “I feel so sick +and faint, I fear I shall drop.”</p> + +<p>As she spoke something touched her leg. She gave a cry and started +aside. It was a hand, but of the body to which it belonged nothing +could be seen. It must have been its last movement; now it stuck there +motionless. Then they spied amid sad sights a sadder still. Upon the +heap, a little way from its edge, sat a child of about three, dressed +like a sailor, gazing down at something—they could not see +what. Going a little nearer, they saw it—the face of a fair woman, +evidently English, who lay dead, with a great beam across her +heart. The child showed no trace of tears; his white face seemed +frozen. The stillness upon it was not despair, but suggested a world +in which hope had never yet been born. Pity drove Mrs. Porson’s +sickness away.</p> + +<figure class="figcenter illowp48" id="000" style="max-width: 40em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/000.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">Mrs. Porson finds Clare by the side of his dead mother.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>“My dear!” she said; but the child took no heed. Her voice, however, +seemed to wake something in him. He started to his feet, and rushing +at the beam, began to tug at it with his tiny hands. Mrs. Porson burst +into tears.</p> + +<p>“It’s no use, darling!” she cried.</p> + +<p>“Wake mamma!” he said, turning, and looking up at her.</p> + +<p>“She will not wake,” sobbed Mrs. Porson.</p> + +<p>Her husband stood by speechless, choking back the tears of which, +being an Englishman, he was ashamed.</p> + +<p>“She <i>will</i> wake,” returned the boy. “She always wakes when I kiss +her.”</p> + +<p>He knelt beside her, to prove upon her white face the efficacy of the +measure he had never until now known to fail. That he had already +tried it was plain, for he had kissed away much of the dust, though +none of the death. When once more he found that she did not even close +her lips to return his passionate salute, he desisted. With that +saddest of things, a child’s sigh, and a look that seemed to Mrs. +Porson to embody the riddle of humanity, he reseated himself on the +beam, with his little feet on his mother’s bosom, where so often she +had made them warm. He did not weep; he did not fix his eyes on his +mother; his look was level and moveless and set upon nothing. He +seemed to have before him an utter blank—as if the outer wall of +creation had risen frowning in front, and he knew there was nothing +behind it but chaos.</p> + +<p>“Where is your papa?” asked Mr. Porson.</p> + +<p>The boy looked round bewildered.</p> + +<p>“Gone,” he answered; nor could they get anything more from him.</p> + +<p>“Was your papa with you here?” asked Mrs. Porson.</p> + +<p>He answered only with the word <i>Gone</i>, uttered in a dazed fashion.</p> + +<p>By this time all the men left in the town were doing their best, under +the direction of an intelligent man, the priest of a neighbouring +parish. They had already got one or two out alive, and their own +priest dead. They worked well, their terror of the lurking earthquake +forgotten in their eagerness to rescue. From their ignorance of the +language, however, Mr. Porson saw they could be of little use; and in +dread of doing more harm than good, he judged it better to go.</p> + +<p>They stood one moment and looked at each other in silence. The child +had dropped from the beam, and lay fast asleep across his mother’s +bosom, with his head on a lump of mortar. Without a word spoken, +Mrs. Porson, picking her way carefully to the spot, knelt down by the +dead mother, tenderly kissed her cheek, lifted the sleeping child, and +with all the awe, and nearly all the tremulous joy of first +motherhood, bore him to her husband. The throes of the earthquake had +slain the parents, and given the child into their arms. Without look +of consultation, mark of difference, or sign of agreement, they turned +in silence and left the terrible church, with the clear summer sky +looking in upon its dead.</p> + +<p>As they passed the door, the sun met them, shining with all his +might. The sea, far away across the tops of hills and the clefts of +valleys, lay basking in his glory. The hot air quivered all over the +wide landscape. From the flight of steps in front of the church they +looked down on the streets of the town, and beyond them into space. It +looked the best of all possible worlds—as neither plague, famine, +pestilence, earthquakes, nor human wrongs, persuade me it is not, +judged by the high intent of its existence. When a man knows that +intent, as I dare to think I do, <i>then</i> let him say, and not till +then, whether it be a good world or not. That in the midst of the +splendour of the sunny day, in the midst of olives and oranges, grapes +and figs, ripening swiftly by the fervour of the circumambient air, +should lie that charnel-church, is a terrible fact, neither to be +ignored, nor to be explained by the paltry theory of the greatest good +to the greatest number; but the end of the maker’s dream is not this.</p> + +<p>When they turned into the street that led to the gate, they found the +donkeys standing where they had left them. Their owner was not with +them. He had gone into the church with the rest, and was killed. When +they caught sight of the patient, dejected animals, unheeded and +unheeding, then first they spoke, whispering in the awful stillness of +the world: they must take the creatures, and make the best of their +way back without a guide! They judged that, as the road was chiefly +down hill, and the donkeys would be going home, they would not have +much difficulty with them. At the worst, short and stout as they were, +they were not bad walkers, and felt more than equal to carrying the +child between them. Not a person was in the street when they mounted; +almost all were in the church, at its strange, terrible service. Mrs. +Porson mounted the strongest of the animals, her husband placed the +sleeping child in her arms, and they started, he on foot by the side +of his wife, and his donkey following. No one saw them pass through +the gate of the town.</p> + +<p>They were not sure of the way, for they had been partly asleep as they +came, but so long as they went downward, and did not leave the road, +they could hardly go wrong! The child slept all the way.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_IV">Chapter IV.<br><span class="smcap">The New Family.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>How shall a man describe what passed in the mind of a childless wife, +with a motherless boy in her arms! It is the loveliest provision, +doubtless, that every child should have a mother of his own; but there +is a mother-love—which I had almost called more divine—the love, +namely, that a woman bears to a child because he is a child, +regardless of whether he be her own or another’s. It is that they may +learn to love thus, that women have children. Some women love so +without having any. No conceivable treasure of the world could have +once entered into comparison with the burden of richness Mrs. Porson +bore. She told afterward, with voice hushed by fear of irreverence, +how, as they went down one of the hills, she slept for a moment, and +dreamed that she was Mary with the holy thing in her arms, fleeing to +Egypt on the ass, with Joseph, her husband, walking by her side. For +years and years they had been longing for a child—and here lay the +divinest little one, with every mark of the kingdom upon him! His +father and mother lying crushed under the fallen dome of that fearful +church, was it strange he should seem to belong to her?</p> + +<p>But there might be some one somewhere in the world with a better +claim; possibly—horrible thought!—with more need of him than she! Up +started a hideous cupidity, a fierce temptation to dishonesty, such as +she had never imagined. We do not know what is in us until the +temptation comes. Then there is the devil to fight. And Mrs. Porson +fought him.</p> + +<p>Mr. Porson was, in a milder degree, affected much as his wife. He +could not help wishing, nor was he wrong in wishing, that, since the +child’s father and mother were gone, they might take their place, and +love their orphan. They were far from rich, but what was one child! +They might surely manage to give him a good education, and set him +doing for himself! But, alas, there might be others—others with +love-property in the child! The same thoughts were working in each, +but neither dared utter them in the presence of the sleeping treasure.</p> + +<p>As they descended the last slope above the town, with the wide +sea-horizon before them, they beheld such a glory of after-sunset as, +even on that coast, was unusual. A chord of colour that might have +been the prostrate fragment of a gigantic rainbow, lay along a large +arc of the horizon. The farther portion of the sea was an indigo blue, +save for a grayish line that parted it from the dusky red of the +sky. This red faded up through orange and dingy yellow to a pale green +and pale blue, above which came the depth of the blue night, in which +rayed resplendent the evening star. Below the star and nearer to the +west, lay, very thin and very long, the sickle of the new moon. If +death be what it looks to the unthinking soul, and if the heavens +declare the glory of God, as they do indeed to the heart that knows +him, then is there discord between heaven and earth such as no +argument can harmonize. But death is not what men think it, for +“Blessed are they that mourn for the dead.”</p> + +<p>The sight enhanced the wonder and hope of the two honest good souls in +the treasure they carried. Out of the bosom of the skeleton Death +himself, had been given them—into their very arms—a germ of life, a +jewel of heaven! At the thought of what lay up the hill behind them, +they felt their joy in the child almost wicked; but if God had taken +the child’s father and mother, might they not be glad in the hope that +he had chosen them to replace them? That he had for the moment at +least, they were bound to believe!</p> + +<p>They travelled slowly on, through the dying sunset, and an hour or two +of the star-bright night that followed, adorned rather than lighted by +the quaint boat of the crescent moon. Weary, but lapt in a voiceless +triumph, they came at last, guided by the donkeys, to their hotel.</p> + +<p>All were talking of the earthquake. A great part of the English had +fled in a panic terror, like sheep that had no shepherd—hunted by +their own fears, and betrayed by their imagined faith. The steadiest +church-goer fled like the infidel he reviled. The fool said in his +heart, “There is no God,” and fled. The Christian said with his mouth, +“Verily there is a God that ruleth in the earth!” and fled—far as he +could from the place which, as he fancied, had shown signs of a +special presence of the father of Jesus Christ.</p> + +<p>After the Porsons were in the house, there came two or three small +shocks. Every time, out with a cry rushed the inhabitants into the +streets; every time, out into the garden of the hotel swarmed such as +were left in it of Germans and English. But our little couple, who had +that day seen so much more of its terrors than any one else in the +place, and whose chamber was at the top of the house where the swaying +was worst, were too much absorbed in watching and tending their lovely +boy to heed the earthquake. Perhaps their hearts whispered, “Can that +which has given us such a gift be unfriendly?”</p> + +<p>“If his father and mother,” said Mrs. Porson, as they stood regarding +him, “are permitted to see their child, they shall see how we love +him, and be willing he should love us!”</p> + +<p>As they went up the stairs with him, the boy woke. When he looked and +saw a face that was not his mother’s, a cloud swept across the heaven +of his eyes. He closed them again, and did not speak. The first of the +shocks came as they were putting him to bed: he turned very white and +looked up fixedly, as if waiting another fall from above, but sat +motionless on his new mother’s lap. The instant the vibration and +rocking ceased, he drank from the cup of milk she offered him, as +quietly as if but a distant thunder had rolled away. When she put him +in the bed, he looked at her with such an indescribable expression of +bewildered loss, that she burst into tears. The child did not cry. He +had not cried since they took him. The woman’s heart was like to break +for him, but she managed to say,</p> + +<p>“God has taken her, my darling. He is keeping her for you, and I am +going to keep you for her;” and with that she kissed him.</p> + +<p>The same moment came the second shock.</p> + +<p>Need wakes prophecy: the need of the child made of the parson a +prophet.</p> + +<p>“It is God that does the shaking,” he said. “It’s all right. Nobody +will be the worse—not much, at least!”</p> + +<p>“Not at all,” rejoined the boy, and turned his face away.</p> + +<p>From the lips of such a tiny child, the words seemed almost awful.</p> + +<p>He fell fast asleep, and never woke till the morning. Mrs. Porson lay +beside him, yielding him, stout as she was, a good half of the little +Italian bed. She scarcely slept for excitement and fear of smothering +him.</p> + +<p>The Porsons were honest people, and for all their desire to possess +the child, made no secret of how and where they had found him, or of +as much of his name as he could tell them, which was only <i>Clare</i>. But +they never heard of inquiry after him. On the gunboat at Genoa they +knew nothing of their commander’s purposes, or where to seek him. Days +passed before they began to be uneasy about him, and when they did +make what search for him they could, it was fruitless.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_V">Chapter V.<br><span class="smcap">His New Home.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>The place to which the good people carried the gift of the +earthquake—carried him with much anxiety and more exultation—had no +very distinctive features. It had many fields in grass, many in crop, +and some lying fallow—all softly undulating. It had some trees, and +everywhere hedges dividing fields whose strange shapes witnessed to a +complicated history, of which few could tell anything. Here and there +in the hollows between the motionless earth-billows, flowed, but did +not seem to flow, what they called a brook. But the brooks there were +like deep soundless pools without beginning or end. There was no life, +no gaiety, no song in them, only a sullen consent to exist. That at +least is how they impress one accustomed to real brooks, lark-like, +always on the quiver, always on the move, always babbling and gabbling +and gamboling, always at their games, always tossing their pebbles +about, and telling them to talk. A man that loved them might say there +was more in the silence of these, than in the speech of those; but +what silence can be better than a song of delight that we are, that we +were, that we are to be! The stillness may be full of solemn fish, +mysterious as itself, and deaf with secrets; but blessed is the brook +that lets the light of its joy shine.</p> + +<p>Dull as the place must seem in this my description, it was the very +country for the boy. He would come into more contact with its modest +beauty in a day than some of us would in a year. Nobody quite knows +the beauty of a country, especially of a quiet country, except one who +has been born in it, or for whom at least childhood and boyhood and +youth have opened door after door into the hidden phases of its +life. There is no square yard on the face of the earth but some one +can in part understand what God meant in making it; while the same +changeful skies canopy the most picturesque and the dullest +landscapes; the same winds wake and blow over desert and pasture land, +making the bosoms of youth and age swell with the delight of their +blowing. The winds are not all so full as are some of delicious odours +gathered as they pass from gardens, fields, and hill-sides; but all +have their burden of sweetness. Those that blew upon little Clare were +oftener filled with the smell of farmyards, and burning weeds, and +cottage-fires, than of flowers; but never would one of such odours +revisit him without bringing fresh delight to his heart. Its mere +memorial suggestion far out on the great sea would wake the old child +in the man. The pollards along the brooks grew lovely to his heart, +and were not the less lovely when he came to understand that they were +not so lovely as God had meant them to be. He was one of those who, +regarding what a thing <i>is</i>, and not comparing it with other things, +descry the thought of God in it, and love it; for to love what is +beautiful is as natural as to love our mothers.</p> + +<p>The parsonage to which his new father and mother brought him was like +the landscape—humble. It was humble even for a parsonage—which has +no occasion to be fine. For men and women whose business it is to +teach their fellows to be true and fair, and not covet fine things, +are but hypocrites, or at best intruders and humbugs, if they want +fine things themselves. Jesus Christ did not care about fine +things. He loved every lovely thing that ever his father made. If any +one does not know the difference between fine things and lovely +things, he does not know much, if he has all the science in the world +at his finger-ends.</p> + +<p>One good thing about the parsonage was, that it was old, and the +swallows had loved it for centuries. That way Clare learned to love +the swallows—and they are worth loving. Then it had a very old +garden, nearly as old-fashioned as it was old, and many flowers that +have almost ceased to be seen grew in it, and did not enjoy their +lives the less that they were out of fashion. All the furniture in the +house was old, and mostly shabby; it was possible, therefore, to love +it a little. Who on earth could be such a fool as to love a new piece +of furniture! One might prize it; one might admire it; one might like +it because it was pretty, or because it was comfortable; but only a +silly woman whose soul went to bed on her new sideboard, could say she +loved it. And then it would not be true. It is impossible that any but +an <i>old</i> piece of furniture should be loved.</p> + +<p>His father and mother had a charming little room made for him in the +garret, right up among the swallows, who soon admitted him a member of +their society—an honorary member, that is, who was not expected to +fly with them to Africa except he liked. His new parents did this +because they saw that, when he could not be with them, he preferred +being by himself; and that moods came upon him in which he would steal +away even from them, seized with a longing for loneliness. In general, +next to being with his mother anywhere, he liked to be with his father +in the study. If both went out, and could not take him with them, he +would either go to his own room, or sit in the study alone. It was a +very untidy room, crowded with books, mostly old and dingy, and in +torn bindings. Many of them their owner never opened, and they +suffered in consequence; a few of them were constantly in his hands, +and suffered in consequence. All smelt strong of stale tobacco, but +that hardly accounts for the fact that Clare never took to smoking. +Another thing perhaps does—that he was always too much of a man to +want to look like a man by imitating men. That is unmanly. A boy who +wants to look like a man is not a manly boy, and men do not care for +his company. A true boy is always welcome to a true man, but a +would-be man is better on the other side of the wall.</p> + +<p>His mother oftenest sat in a tiny little drawing-room, which smelt of +withered rose-leaves. I think it must smell of them still. I believe +it smelt of them a hundred years before she saw the place. Clare loved +the smell of the rose-leaves and disliked the smell of the tobacco; +yet he preferred the study with its dingy books to the pretty +drawing-room without his mother.</p> + +<p>There was a village, a very small one, in the parish, and a good many +farm-houses.</p> + +<p>Such was the place in which Clare spent the next few years of his +life, and there his new parents loved him heartily. The only thing +about him that troubled them, besides the possibility of losing him, +was, that they could not draw out the tiniest smile upon his sweet, +moonlight-face.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_VI">Chapter VI.<br><span class="smcap">What did draw out his first Smile.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Mr. Porson was a man about five and forty; his wife was a few years +younger. His theories of religion were neither large nor lofty; he +accepted those that were handed down to him, and did not trouble +himself as to whether they were correct. He did what was better: he +tried constantly to obey the law of God, whether he found it in the +Bible or in his own heart. Thus he was greater in the kingdom of +heaven than thousands that knew more, had better theories about God, +and could talk much more fluently concerning religion than he. By +obeying God he let God teach him. So his heart was always growing; and +where the heart grows, there is no fear of the intellect; there it +also grows, and in the best fashion of growth. He was very good to his +people, and not foolishly kind. He tried his best to help them to be +what they ought to be, to make them bear their troubles, be true to +one another, and govern themselves. He was like a father to them. For +some, of course, he could do but little, because they were locked +boxes with nothing in them; but for a few he did much. Perhaps it was +because he was so good to his flock that God gave him little Clare to +bring up. Perhaps it was because he and his wife were so good to +Clare, that by and by a wonderful thing took place.</p> + +<p>About three years after the earthquake, Mrs. Porson had a baby-girl +sent her for her very own. The father and mother thought themselves +the happiest couple on the face of the earth—and who knows but they +were! If they were not, so much the better! for then, happy as they +were, there were happier yet than they; and who, in his greatest +happiness, would not be happier still to know that the earth held +happier than he!</p> + +<p>When Clare first saw the baby, he looked down on her with solemn, +unmoved countenance, and gazed changeless for a whole minute. He +thought there had been another earthquake, that another church-dome +had fallen, and another child been found and brought home from the +ruin. Then light began to grow somewhere under his face. His mother, +full as was her heart of her new child, watched his countenance +anxiously. The light under his face grew and grew, till his face was +radiant. Then out of the midst of the shining broke the heavenliest +smile she had ever seen on human countenance—a smile that was a +clearer revelation of God than ten thousand books about him. For what +must not that God be, who had made the boy that smiled such a smile +and never knew it! After this he smiled occasionally, though it was +but seldom. He never laughed—that is, not until years after this +time; but, on the other hand, he never looked sullen. A quiet peace, +like the stillness of a long summer twilight in the north, dwelt upon +his visage, and appeared to model his every motion. Part of his life +seemed away, and he waiting for it to come back. Then he would be +merry!</p> + +<p>He was never in a hurry, yet always doing something—always, that is, +when he was not in his own room. There his mother would sometimes find +him sitting absolutely still, with his hands on his knees. Nor was she +sorry to surprise him thus, for then she was sure of one of his rare +smiles. She thought he must then be dreaming of his own mother, and a +pang would go through her at the thought that he would one day love +her more than herself. “He will laugh then!” she said. She did not +think how the gratitude of that mother would one day overwhelm her +with gladness.</p> + +<p>He never sought to be caressed, but always snuggled to one that drew +him close. Never once did he push any one away. He learned what +lessons were set him—not very fast, but with persistent endeavour to +understand. He was greatly given to reading, but not particularly +quick. He thus escaped much fancying that he knew when he did not +know—a quicksand into which fall so many clever boys and girls. Give +me a slow, steady boy, who knows when he does not know a thing! To +know that you do not know, is to be a small prophet. Such a boy has a +glimmer of the something he does not know, or at least of the place +where it is; while the boy who easily grasps the words that stand for +a thing, is apt to think he knows the thing itself when he sees but +the wrapper of it—thinks he knows the church when he has caught sight +of the weather-cock. Mrs. Porson could see the understanding of a +thing gradually burst into blossom on the boy’s face. It did not +smile, it only shone. Understanding is light; it needs love to change +light into a smile.</p> + +<p>There was something in the boy that his parents hardly hoped to +understand; something in his face that made them long to know what was +going on in him, but made them doubt if ever in this life they +should. He was not concealing anything from them. He did not know that +he had anything to tell, or that they wanted to know anything. He +never doubted that everybody saw him just as he felt himself; his soul +seemed bare to all the world. But he knew little of what was passing +in him: child or man never knows more than a small part of that.</p> + +<p>When first he was allowed to take the little Mary in his arms, he +sitting on a stool at his mother’s feet, it was almost a new start in +his existence. A new confidence was born in his spirit. Mrs. Porson +could read, as if reflected in his countenance, the pride and +tenderness that composed so much of her own conscious motherhood. A +certain staidness, almost sternness, took possession of his face as he +bent over the helpless creature, half on his knees, half in his +arms—the sternness of a protecting divinity that knew danger not +afar. He had taken a step upward in being; he was aware in himself, +without knowing it, of the dignity of fatherhood. Even now he knew +what so many seem never to learn, that a man is the defender of the +weak; that, if a man is his brother’s keeper, still more is he his +sister’s. She belonged to him, therefore he was hers in the slavery of +love, which alone is freedom. So reverential and so careful did he +show himself, that soon his mother trusted him, to the extent of his +power, more than any nurse.</p> + +<p>By and by she made the delightful discovery that, when he was alone +with the baby, the silent boy could talk. Where was no need or hope of +being understood, his words began to flow—with a rhythmical cadence +that seemed ever on the verge of verse. When first his mother heard +the sweet murmur of his voice, she listened; and then first she +learned what a hold the terrible thing that had given him into her +arms had upon him. For she heard him half singing, half saying—</p> + +<p>“Baby, baby, do not grow. Keep small, and lie on my lap, and dream of +walking, but never walk; for when you walk you will run, and when you +run you will go away with father and mother—away to a big place where +the ground goes up to the sky; and you will go up the ground that goes +up to the sky, and you will come to a big church, and you will go into +the church; and the ground and the church and the sky will go _hurr, +hurr, hurr_; and the sky, full of angels, will come down with a great +roar; and all the yards and sails will drop out of the sky, and tumble +down father and mother, and hold them down that they cannot get up +again; and then you will have nobody but me. I will do all I can, but +I am only brother Clare, and you will want, want, want mother and +father, mother and father, and they will be always coming, and never +be come, not for ever so long! Don’t grow a big girl, Maly!”</p> + +<p><figure class="figcenter illowp47" id="001a" style="max-width: 39.4375em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/001a.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">Clare is heard talking to Maly.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>The mother could not think what to say. She went in, and, in the hope +of turning his thoughts aside, took the baby, and made haste to +consult her husband.</p> + +<p>“We must leave it,” said Mr. Porson. “Experience will soon correct +what mistake is in his notion. It is not so very far wrong. You and I +must go from them one day: what is it but that the sky will fall down +on us, and our bodies will get up no more! He thinks the time nearer +at hand than for their sakes I hope it is; but nobody can tell.”</p> + +<p>Clare never associated the church where the awful thing took place, +with the church to which he went on Sundays. The time for it, he +imagined, came to everybody. To Clare, nothing ever <i>happened</i>. The +way out of the world was a church in a city set on a hill, and there +an earthquake was always ready.</p> + +<p>The heart of his adoptive mother grew yet more tender toward him after +the coming of her own child. She was not quite sure that she did not +love him even more than Mary. She could not help the feeling that he +was a child of heaven sent out to nurse on the earth; and that it was +in reward for her care of him that her own darling was sent her. That +their love to the boy had something to do with the coming of the girl, +I believe myself, though what that something was, I do not precisely +understand.</p> + +<p>She left him less often alone with the child. She would not have his +thoughts drawn to the church of the earthquake; neither would she have +the mournfulness of his sweet voice much in the ears of her baby. He +never sang in a minor key when any one was by, but always and solely +when the baby and he were alone together.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_VII">Chapter VII.<br><span class="smcap">Clare and his Brothers.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>After a year or two, Mr. Porson became anxious lest the boy should +grow up too unlike other boys—lest he should not be manly, but of a +too gently sad behaviour. He began, therefore, to take him with him +about the parish, and was delighted to find him show extraordinary +endurance. He would walk many miles, and come home less fatigued than +his companion. To be sure, he had not much weight to carry; but it +seemed to Mr. Porson that his utter freedom from thought about himself +had a large share in his immunity from weariness. He continued slight +and thin—which was natural, for he was growing fast; but the muscles +of his little bird-like legs seemed of steel. The spindle-shanks went +striding, striding without a check, along the roughest roads, the pale +face shining atop of them like a sweet calm moon. To Mr. Porson’s +eyes, the moon, stooping, as she sometimes seems to do, downward from +the sky, always looked like him. The child woke something new in the +heart and mind of every one that loved him, but was himself +unconscious of his influence. His company was no check to his father +when meditating, after his habit as he walked, what he should say to +his people the next Sunday. For the good man never wrote or read a +sermon, but talked to his people as one who would meet what was in +them with what was in him. Hence they always believed “the parson +meant it.” He never said anything clever, and never said anything +unwise; never amused them, and never made them feel scornful, either +of him or of any one else.</p> + +<p>Instead of finding the presence of Clare distract his thoughts, he had +at times a curious sense that the boy was teaching him—that his +sermon was running before, or walking sedately on this side of him or +that. For Clare could run like the wind; and did run after +butterflies, dragon-flies, or anything that offered a chance of seeing +it nearer; but he never killed, and seldom tried to catch anything, if +but for a moment’s examination. The swiftest run would scarcely +heighten the colour of his pale cheeks.</p> + +<p>He soon came to be known in the farm-houses of the parish. The +farmer-families were a little shy of him at first, fancying him too +fine a little gentleman for them; but as they got to know him, they +grew fond of him. They called him “the parson’s man,” which pleased +Clare. But one old woman called him “the parson’s cherubim.”</p> + +<p>One day Mr. Porson was calling at the house of the largest farm in the +parish, the nearest house to the parsonage. The farmer’s wife was ill, +and having to go to her room to see her, he said to the boy—</p> + +<p>“Clare, you run into the yard. Give my compliments to any one you +meet, and ask him to let you stay with him.”</p> + +<p>When the time came for their departure, Mr. Porson went to find +him. He did not call him; he wanted to see what he was about. Unable +to discover him, and coming upon no one of whom he might inquire, for +it was hay-time and everybody in the fields, he was at last driven to +use his voice.</p> + +<p>He had not to call twice. Out of the covered part of the pigsty, not +far from which the parson stood, the boy came creeping on all fours, +followed by a litter of half-grown, grunting, gamboling pigs.</p> + +<p>“Here I am, papa!” he cried.</p> + +<p>“Clare,” exclaimed his father, “what a mess you have made of +yourself!”</p> + +<p>“I gave them your compliments,” answered the boy, as he scrambled over +the fence with his father’s assistance, “and asked them if I might +stay with them till you were ready. They said yes, and invited me +in. I went in; and we’ve been having such games! They were very kind +to me.”</p> + +<p>His father turned involuntarily and looked into the sty. There stood +all the pigs in a row, gazing after the boy, and looking as sorry as +their thick skins and bony snouts would let them. Their mother rose in +a ridge behind them, gazing too. Mr. Skymer always spoke of pigs as +about the most intelligent animals in the world.</p> + +<figure class="figcenter illowp46" id="002" style="max-width: 38.6875em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/002.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">Clare makes friends during Mr. Porson’s absence.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>I do not know when or where or how his love of the animals began, for +he could not tell me. If it began with the pigs, it was far from +ending with them.</p> + +<p>The next day he asked his father if he might go and call upon the +pigs.</p> + +<p>“Have you forgotten, Clare,” said his mother, “what a job Susan and I +had with your clothes? I wonder still how you could have done such a +thing! They were quite filthy. When I saw you, I had half a mind to +put you in a bath, clothes and all. I doubt if they are sweet yet!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, yes, they are, indeed, mamma!” returned Clare; “and you know I +shall be careful after this! I shall not go into their house, but get +the farmer to let them out. I’ve thought of a new game with them!”</p> + +<p>His mother consented; the farmer did let the pigs out; and Clare and +they had a right good game together among the ricks in the yard.</p> + +<p>His growing nature showed itself in a swiftly widening friendship for +live things. The spreading ripples of his affection took in the cows +and the horses, the hens and the geese, and every creature about the +place, till at length it had to pull up at the moles, because he could +not get at them. I doubt if he would have liked them if he had seen +one eat a frog! He called the pigs little brothers, and the horses and +cows big brothers, and was perfectly at home with them before people +knew he cared for their company. I think his absolute simplicity +brought him near to the fountain of life, or rather, prevented him +from straying from it; and this kept him so alive himself, that he was +delicately sensitive to all life. He felt himself pledged to all other +life as being one with it. Its forms were therefore so open to him as +to seem familiar from the first. He knew instinctively what went on in +regions of life differing from his own—knew, without knowing how, +what the animals were thinking and feeling; so was able to interpret +their motions, even the sudden changes in their behaviour.</p> + +<p>There was one dangerous animal on the place—a bull, of which the +farmer had often said he must part with him, or he would be the death +of somebody. One morning he was struck with terror to find Clare in +the stall with Nimrod. The brute was chained up pretty short, but was +free enough for terrible mischief: Clare was stroking his nose, and +the beast was standing as still as a bull of bronze, with one curved +and one sharp, forward-set, wicked-looking horn in alarming proximity +to the angelic face. The farmer stood in dismay, still as the bull, +afraid to move. Clare looked up and smiled, but his delicate little +hand went on caressing the huge head. It was one of God’s small high +creatures visiting with good news of hope one of his big low +creatures—a little brother of Jesus Christ bringing a taste of his +father’s kingdom to his great dull bull of a brother. The farmer +called him. The boy came at once. Mr. Goodenough told him he must not +go near the bull; he was fierce and dangerous. Clare informed him that +he and the bull had been friends for a long time; and to prove it ran +back, and before the farmer could lay hold of him, was perched on the +animal’s shoulders. The bull went on eating the grass in the manger +before him, and took as little heed of the boy as if it were but a fly +that had lighted on him, and neither tickled nor stung him.</p> + +<p>By degrees he grew familiar with all the goings on at the farm, and +drew nearer to a true relation with the earth that nourishes +all. Where the soil was not too heavy, the ploughman would set him on +the back of the near horse, and there he would ride in triumph to the +music of the ploughman’s whistle behind. His was not the pomp of the +destroyer who rides trampling, but the pomp of the saviour drawing +forth life from the earth. In the summer the hayfield knew him, and in +the autumn the harvest-field, where busily he gathered what the earth +gave, and for himself strength, a sense of wide life and large +relations. The very mould, not to say the grass-blades and the +daisies, was dear to him. He was more sympathetic with the daisies +ploughed down than was even Burns, for he had a strong feeling that +they went somewhere, and were the better for going; that this was the +way their sky fell upon them.</p> + +<p>All the people on the farm, all the people of the village, every one +in the parish knew the boy and his story. From his gentleness and +lovingkindness to live things, there were who said he was half-witted; +others said he saw ghosts. The boys of the village despised, and some +hated him, because he was so unlike them. They called him a girl +because where they tormented he caressed. At this he would smile, and +they durst not lay hands on him.</p> + +<p>The days are long in boyhood, and Clare could do a many things in +one. There was the morning, the forenoon, and the long afternoon and +evening! He could help on the farm; he could play with ever so many +animals; he could learn his lessons, which happily were not heavy; he +could read any book he pleased in his father’s library, where +<i>Paradise Lost</i> was his favourite; he could nurse little “Maly.” He had +the more time for all these that he had no companion of his own age, +no one he wanted to go about with after school-hours. His father was +still his chief human companion, and neither of them grew tired of the +other.</p> + +<p>The most remarkable thing in the child was the calm and gentle +greatness of his heart. You often find children very fond of one or +two people, who, perhaps, in evil return, want to keep them all to +themselves, and reproach them for loving others. Many persons count it +a sign of depth in a child that he loves only one or two. I doubt it +greatly. I think that only the child who loves all life can love right +well, can love deeply and strongly and tenderly the lives that come +nearest him. Low nurses and small-hearted mothers dwarf and pervert +their children, doing their worst to keep them from having big hearts +like God. Clare had other teaching than this. He had lost his father +and mother, but many were given him to love; and so he was helped to +wait patiently till he found them again. God was keeping them for him +somewhere, and keeping him for them here.</p> + +<p>The good for which we are born into this world is, that we may learn +to love. I think Clare the most enviable of boys, because he loved +more than any one of his age I have heard of. There are people—oh, +such silly people they are!—though they may sometimes be +pleasing—who are always wanting people to love them. They think so +much of themselves, that they want to think more; and to know that +people love them makes them able to think more of themselves. They +even think themselves loving because they are fond of being loved! +You might as soon say because a man loves money he is generous; +because he loves to gather, therefore he knows how to scatter; because +he likes to read a story, therefore he can write one. Such lovers are +only selfish in a deeper way, and are more to blame than other selfish +people; for, loving to be loved, they ought the better to know what an +evil thing it is not to love; what a mean thing to accept what they +are not willing to give. Even to love only those that love us, is, as +the Lord has taught us, but a pinched and sneaking way of +loving. Clare never thought about being loved. He was too busy loving, +with so many about him to love, to think of himself. He was not the +contemptible little wretch to say, “What a fine boy I am, to make +everybody love me!” If he had been capable of that, not many would +have loved him; and those that did would most of them have got tired +of loving a thing that did not love again. Only great lovers like God +are able to do that, and they help God to make love grow. But there is +little truth in love where there is no wisdom in it. Clare’s father +and mother were wise, and did what they could to make Clare wise.</p> + +<p>Also the animals, though they were not aware of it, did much to save +him from being spoiled by the humans whom the boy loved more than +them. For Clare’s charity began at home. Those who love their own +people will love other people. Those who do not love children will +never love animals right.</p> + +<p>Here I will set down a strange thing that befell Clare, and caused him +a sore heart, making him feel like a traitor to the whole animal race, +and influencing his life for ever. I was at first puzzled to account +for the thing without attributing more imagination to the animals—or +some of them—than I had been prepared to do; but probably the main +factor in it was heart-disease.</p> + +<p>He had seen men go out shooting, but had never accompanied any +killers. I do not quite understand how, as in my story, he came even +to imitate using a gun. There was nothing in him that belonged to +killing; and that is more than I could say for myself, or any other +man I know except Clare Skymer.</p> + +<p>He was at the bottom of the garden one afternoon, where nothing but a +low hedge came between him and a field of long grass. He had in his +hand the stick of a worn-out umbrella. Suddenly a half-grown rabbit +rose in the grass before him, and bolted. From sheer unconscious +imitation, I believe, he raised the stick to his shoulder, and said +<i>Bang</i>. The rabbit gave a great bound into the air, fell, and lay +motionless. With far other feelings than those of a sportsman, Clare +ran, got through the hedge, and approached the rabbit trembling. He +could think nothing but that the creature was playing him a trick. Yet +he was frightened. Only how could he have hurt him!</p> + +<p>“I dare say the little one knows me,” he said to himself, “and wanted +to give me a start! He couldn’t tell what a start it would be, or he +wouldn’t have done it.”</p> + +<p>When he drew near, however, “the little one” did not, as he had hoped +and expected, jump up and run again. With sinking heart Clare went +close up, and looked down on it. It lay stretched out, motionless. +With death in his own bosom he stooped and tenderly lifted it. The +rabbit was stone-dead! The poor boy gazed at it, pressed it tenderly +to his heart, and went with it to find his mother. The tears kept +pouring down his face, but he uttered no cry till he came to her. Then +a low groaning howl burst from him; he laid the dead thing in her lap, +and threw himself on the floor at her feet in an abandonment of +self-accusation and despair.</p> + +<p>It was long before he was able to give her an intelligible account of +what had taken place. She asked him if he had found it dead. In answer +he could only shake his head, but that head-shake had a whole tragedy +in it. Then she examined “the little one,” but could find no mark of +any wound upon it. When at length she learned how the case was, she +tried to comfort him, insisting he was not to blame, for he did not +mean to kill the little one. He would not hearken to her loving +sophistry.</p> + +<p>“No, mother!” he said through his sobs; “I wouldn’t have blamed +myself, though I should have been very sorry, if I had killed him by +accident—if I had stepped upon him, or anything of that kind; but I +meant to frighten him! I looked bad at him! I made him think I was an +enemy, and going to kill him! I shammed bad—and so was real bad.”</p> + +<p>He stopped with a most wailful howl.</p> + +<p>“Perhaps he knew me,” he resumed, “and couldn’t understand it. It was +much worse than if I had shot him. He wouldn’t have known then till he +was dead. But to die of terror was horrible. Oh, why didn’t I think +what I was doing?”</p> + +<p>“Nobody could have thought of such a thing happening.”</p> + +<p>“No; but I ought to have thought, mother, of what I was doing. I was +trying to frighten him! I must have been in a cruel mood. Why didn’t I +think love to the little one when I saw him, instead of thinking death +to him? I shall never look a rabbit in the face again! My heart must +have grown black, mother!”</p> + +<p>“I don’t believe there is another rabbit in England would die from +such a cause,” persisted his mother thoughtfully.</p> + +<p>“Then what a superior rabbit he must have been!” said Clare. “To think +that I pulled down the roof of his church upon him!”</p> + +<p>He burst into a torrent of tears, and ran to his own room. There his +mother thought it better to leave him undisturbed. She wisely judged +that a mind of such sensibility was alone capable of finding the +comfort to fit its need.</p> + +<p>Such comfort he doubtless did find, for by the time his mother called +him to tea, calmness had taken the place of the agony on his +countenance. His mother asked him no questions, for she as well as her +husband feared any possible encouragement to self-consciousness. I +imagine the boy had reflected that things could not go so wrong that +nobody could set them right. I imagine he thought that, if he had done +the rabbit a wrong, as he never for a moment to the end of his life +doubted he had, he who is at the head of all heads and the heart of +all hearts, would contrive to let him tell the rabbit he was sorry, +and would give him something to do for the rabbit that would make up +for his cruelty to him. He did once say to his mother, and neither of +them again alluded to the matter, that he was sure the rabbit had +forgiven him.</p> + +<p>“Little ones are <i>so</i> forgiving, you know, mother!” he added.</p> + +<p>Is it any wonder that my friend Clare Skymer should have been no +sportsman?</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_VIII">Chapter VIII.<br><span class="smcap">Clare and his Human Brothers.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Another anecdote of him, that has no furtherance of the story in it, I +must yet tell.</p> + +<p>One cold day in a stormy March, the wind was wildly blowing broken +clouds across the heavens, and now rain, now sleet, over the shivering +blades of the young corn, whose tender green was just tinging the dark +brown earth. The fields were now dark and wintry, heartless and cold; +now shining all over as with repentant tears; one moment refusing to +be comforted, and the next reviving with hope and a sense of new +life. Clare was hovering about the plough. Suddenly he spied, from a +mound in the field, a little procession passing along the +highway. Those in front carried something on their shoulders which +must be heavy, for it took six of them to carry it. He knew it was a +coffin, for his home was by the churchyard, and a funeral was no +unfamiliar sight. Behind it one man walked alone. For a moment Clare +watched him, and saw his bowed head and heavy pace. His heart filled +from its own perennial fount of pity, which was God himself in him. He +ran down the hill and across the next field, making for a spot some +distance ahead of the procession. As it passed him, he joined the +chief mourner, who went plodding on with his arms hanging by his +sides. Creeping close up to him, he slid his little soft hand into the +great horny hand of the peasant. Instinctively the big hand closed +upon the small one, and the weather-beaten face of a man of fifty +looked down on the boy. Not a word was said between them. They walked +on, hand in hand.</p> + +<p>Neither had ever seen the other. The man was following his wife and +his one child to the grave. “Nothing almost sees miracles but misery,” +says Kent in <i>King Lear</i>. Because this man was miserable, he saw a +miracle where was no miracle, only something very good. The thing was +true and precious, yea, a message from heaven. Those deep, upturned, +silent eyes; the profound, divine sympathy that shone in them; the +grasp of the tiny hand upon his large fingers, made the heart of the +man, who happened to be a catholic, imagine, and for a few moments +believe, that he held the hand of the infant Saviour. The cloud lifted +from his heart and brain, and did not return when he came to +understand that this was not <i>the</i> lamb of God, only another lamb from +the same fold.</p> + +<p>When they had walked about two miles, the boy began to fear he might +be intruding, and would have taken his hand from the other, but the +man held it tight, and stooping whispered it was not far now. The +child, who, without knowing it, had taken the man under the +protection of his love, yielded at once, went with him to the grave, +joined in the service, and saw the grave filled. They went again as +they had come. Not a word was spoken. The man wept a little now and +then, drew the back of his brown hand across his eyes, and pressed a +little closer the hand he held. At the gate of the parsonage the boy +took his leave. He said they would be wondering what had become of +him, or he would have gone farther. The man released him without a +word.</p> + +<p>His mother had been uneasy about him, but when he told her how it was, +she said he had done right.</p> + +<p>“Yes,” returned the boy; “I belong there myself.”</p> + +<p>The mother knew he was not thinking of the grave.</p> + +<p>One more anecdote I will give, serving to introduce the narrative of +the following chapter, and helping to show the character of the +boy. He was so unlike most boys, that one must know all he may about +him, if he would understand him.</p> + +<p>Never yet, strange as the assertion must seem, had the boy shown any +anger. His father was a little troubled at the fact, fearing such +absence of resentment might indicate moral indifference, or, if not, +might yet render him incapable of coping with the world. He had +himself been brought up at a public school, and had not, with all his +experience of life, come to see, any more than most of the readers of +this story now see, or for a long time will see, that there lies no +nobility, no dignity in evil retort of any kind; that evil is evil +when returned as much as when given; that the only shining thing is +good—and the most shining, good for evil.</p> + +<p>One day a coarse boy in the village gave him a sharp blow on the +face. It forced water from his eyes and blood from his nose. He was +wiping away both at once with his handkerchief, when a kindly girl +stopped and said to him—</p> + +<p>“Never mind; don’t cry.”</p> + +<p>“Oh, no!” answered Clare; “it’s only water, it’s not crying. It would +be cowardly to cry.”</p> + +<p>“That’s a brave boy! You’ll give it him back one of these days.”</p> + +<p>“No,” he returned, “I shall not. I couldn’t.”</p> + +<p>“Why?”</p> + +<p>“Because it hurts so. My nose feels as if it were broken. I know it’s +not broken, but it feels like it.”</p> + +<p>The girl, as well as the boys who stood around him, burst into +laughter. They saw no logic in his reasoning. Clare’s was the divine +reasoning that comes of loving your neighbour; theirs was the earthly +reasoning that came of loving themselves. They did not see that to +Clare another boy was another of himself; that he was carrying out the +design of the Father of men, that his creatures should come together +into one, not push each other away.</p> + +<p>The next time he met the boy who struck him, so far was he both from +resentment and from the fear of being misunderstood, that he offered +him a rosy-cheeked apple his mother had given him as he left for +school. The boy was tyrant and sneak together—a combination to be +seen sometimes in a working man set over his fellows, and in a rich +man grown poor, and bent upon making money again. The boy took the +apple, never doubted Clare gave it him to curry favour, ate it up +grinning, and threw the core in his face. Clare turned away with a +sigh, and betook himself to his handkerchief again, The boy burst into +a guffaw of hideous laughter.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_IX">Chapter IX.<br><span class="smcap">Clare the Defender.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>This enemy was a trouble, more or less, to every decent person in the +neighbourhood. It was well his mother was a widow, for where she was +only powerless to restrain, the father would have encouraged. He was a +big, idle, sneering, insolent lad—such that had there been two more +of the sort, they would have made the village uninhabitable. It was +all the peaceable vicar could do to keep his hands off him.</p> + +<p>One day, little Mary being then about five years old, Clare had her +out for a walk. They were alone in a narrow lane, not far from the +farm where Clare was so much at home. To his consternation, for he had +his sister in charge, down the lane, meeting them, came the village +tyrant. He strolled up with his hands in his pockets, and barred their +way. But while, his eye chiefly on Clare, he “straddled” like +Apollyon, but not “quite over the whole breadth of the way,” Mary +slipped past him. The young brute darted after the child. Clare put +down his head, as he had seen the rams do, and as Simpson, who ill +deserved the name of the generous Jewish Hercules, was on the point of +laying hold of her, caught him in the flank, butted him into the +ditch, and fell on the top of him.</p> + +<p>“Run, Maly!” he cried; “I’ll be after you in a moment.”</p> + +<p>“Will you, you little devil!” cried the bully; and taking him by the +throat, so that he could not utter even a gurgle, got up and began to +beat him unmercifully. But the sounds of their conflict had reached +the ears of the bull Nimrod, who was feeding within the hedge. He +recognized Clare’s voice, perhaps knew from it that he was in trouble; +but I am inclined to think pure bull-love of a row would alone have +sent him tearing to the quarter whence the tyrant’s brutal bellowing +still came. There, looking over the hedge, he saw his friend in the +clutches of an enemy of his own, for Simpson never lost a chance of +teasing Nimrod when he could do so with safety. Over he came with a +short roar and a crash. Looking up, the bully saw a bigger bully than +himself, with his head down and horns level, retreating a step or two +in preparation for running at him. Simpson shoved the helpless Clare +toward the enemy and fled. Clare fell. Nimrod jumped over his +prostrate friend and tore after Simpson. Clare got up and would at +once have followed to protect his enemy, but that he must first see +his sister safe. He ran with her to a cottage hard by, handed her to +the woman at the door of it, and turning pursued Simpson and the bull.</p> + +<p>Nimrod overtook his enemy in the act of scrambling over a five-barred +gate. Simpson saw the head of the bull coming down upon him like the +bows of a Dutchman upon a fishing-boat, and, paralyzed with terror, +could not move an inch further. Crash against the gate came the horns +of Nimrod, with all the weight and speed of his body behind them. Away +went the gate into the field, and away went Simpson and the bull with +it, the latter nearly breaking his neck, for his horns were entangled +in the bars, one of them by the diagonal bar. Simpson’s right leg was +jammed betwixt the gate and the head and horns of the bull. He roared, +and his roars maddened Nimrod, furious already that he could not get +his horns clear. Shake and pull as he might, the gate stuck to them; +and Simpson fared little the better that the bull’s quarrel was for +the moment with the gate, and not with the leg between him and it.</p> + +<p>Clare had not seen the catastrophe, and did not know what had become +of pursuer or pursued, until he reached the gap where the gate had +been. He saw then the odd struggle going on, and ran to the aid of his +foe, in terror of what might already have befallen him. The moment he +laid hold of one of the animal’s horns, infuriated as Nimrod was with +his helpless entanglement, he knew at once who it was, and was quiet; +for Clare always took him by the horn when first he went up to +him. Without a moment’s demur he yielded to the small hands as they +pushed and pulled his head this way and that until they got it clear +of the gate. But then they did not let him go. Clare proceeded to take +him home, and Nimrod made no objection. Simpson lay groaning.</p> + +<p>When Clare returned, his enemy was there still. He had got clear of +the gate, but seemed in much pain, for he lay tearing up the grass and +sod in handfuls. When Clare stooped to ask what he should do for him, +he struck him a backhanded blow on the face that knocked him +over. Clare got up and ran.</p> + +<p>“Coward!” cried Simpson; “to leave a man with a broken leg to get home +by himself!”</p> + +<p>“I’m going to find some one strong enough to help you,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>But Simpson, after his own evil nature, imagined he was going to let +the bull into the field again, and fell to praying him not to leave +him. Clare knew, however, that, if his leg was broken, he could not +get him home, neither could he get home by himself; so he made haste +to tell the people at the farm, and Simpson lay in terror of the bull +till help came.</p> + +<p>From that hour he hated Clare, attributing to him all the ill he had +brought on himself. But he was out of mischief for a while. The +trouble fell on his mother—who deserved it, for she would believe no +ill of him, because he was <i>hers</i>. One good thing of the affair was, +that the bully was crippled for life, and could do the less harm.</p> + +<p>It was a great joy to Mr. Porson to learn how Clare had defended his +sister. Clergyman as he was, and knowing that Jesus Christ would never +have returned a blow, and that this spirit of the Lord was what saved +the world, he had been uneasy that his adopted child behaved just like +Jesus. That a man should be so made as not to care to return a blow, +never occurred to Mr. Porson as possible. It was therefore an +immeasurable relief to his feelings as an Englishman, to find that the +boy was so far from being destitute of pluck, that in defence of his +sister he had attacked a fellow twice his size.</p> + +<p>“Weren’t you afraid of such a big rascal?” he said.</p> + +<p>“No, papa,” answered the boy. “Ought I to have been?”</p> + +<p>He put his hand to his forehead, as if trying to understand. His +father found he had himself something to think about.</p> + +<p>There was a certain quiescence about Clare, ill to describe, +impossible to explain, but not the less manifest. Like an infant, he +never showed surprise at anything. Whatever came to him he received, +questioning nothing, marvelling at nothing, disputing nothing. What he +was told to do he went to do, never with even a momentary show of +disinclination, leaving book or game with readiness but no +eagerness. He would do deftly what was required of him, and return to +his place, with a countenance calm and sweet as the moon in highest +heaven. He seldom offered a caress except to little Mary; yet would +choose, before anything else, a place by his mother’s knee. The moment +she, or his father in her absence, entered the room and sat down, he +would rise, take his stool, and set it as near as he thought he +might. When caressed he never turned away, or looked as if he would +rather be let alone; at the same time he received the caress so +quietly, and with so little response, that often, when his heavenly +look had drawn the heart of some mother, or spinster with motherly +heart, he left an ache in the spirit he would have gone to the world’s +end to comfort. He never sought love—otherwise than by getting near +the loved. When anything was given him, he would look up and smile, +but he seldom showed much pleasure, or went beyond the regulation +thanks. But if at such a moment little Mary were by, he had a curious +way of catching her up and presenting her to the giver. Whether this +was a shape his thanks took, whether Mary was to him an incorporate +gratitude, or whether he meant to imply that she was the fitter on +whom to shower favour, it were hard to say. His mother observed, and +in her mind put the two things together, that he did not seem to prize +much any mere possession. He looked pleased with a new suit of +clothes, but if any one remarked on his care of them, he would answer, +“I mustn’t spoil what’s papa and mamma’s!” He made no hoard of any +kind. He did once hoard marbles till he had about a hundred; then it +was discovered that they were for a certain boy in the village who was +counted half-witted—as indeed was Clare himself by many. When he +learned that the boy had first been accused of stealing them—for no +one would believe that another boy had given them to him—and after +that robbed of them by the other boys, on the ground that he did not +know how to play with them, Clare saw that it was as foolish to hoard +for another as for himself.</p> + +<p>He was a favourite with few beyond those that knew him well. Many who +saw him only at church, or about the village, did not take to him. His +still regard repelled them. In Naples they would have said he had the +evil eye. I think people had a vague sense of rebuke in his +presence. Even his mother, passionately loving her foundling, was +aware of a film between them through which she could not quite see +him, beyond which there was something she could not get at. Clare knew +nothing of such a separation. He seemed to himself altogether close to +his mother, was aware of nothing between to part them. The cause of +the thing was, that Clare was not yet in flower. His soul was a white +half-blown bud, not knowing that it was but half-blown. It basked in +the glory of the warm sun, but only with the underside of its +flower-leaves; it had not opened its heart, the sun-side of its +petals, to the love in which it was immerged. He received the love as +a matter of course, and loved it as a matter of course. But for the +cruel Simpson he would not have known there could be any other way of +things. He did not yet know that one must not only love but mean to +love, must not only bask in the warmth of love, but know it as love, +and where it comes from—love again the fountain whence it flows.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_X">Chapter X.<br><span class="smcap">The Black Aunt.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Clare was yet in his tenth year when an unhealthy summer came. The sun +was bright and warm as in other summers, and the flowers in field and +garden appeared as usual when the hour arrived for them to wake and +look abroad; but the children of men did not fare so well as the +children of the earth. A peculiar form of fever showed itself in the +village. It was not very fatal, yet many were so affected as to be +long unable to work. There was consequently much distress beyond the +suffering of the fever itself. The parson and his wife went about from +morning to night among the cottagers, helping everybody that needed +help. They had no private fortune, but the small blanket of the +benefice they spread freely over as many as it could be stretched to +cover, depriving themselves of a good part of the food to which they +had been accustomed, and of several degrees of necessary warmth. When +at last the strength of the parson gave way, and the fever laid hold +of him, he had to do without many comforts his wife would gladly have +got for him. They were both of rather humble origin, having but one +relative well-to-do, a sister of Mrs. Porson, who had married a rich +but very common man. From her they could not ask help. She had never +sent them any little present, and had been fiercely indignant with +them for adopting Clare.</p> + +<p>Neither of them once complained, though Mrs. Porson, whose strength +was much spent, could not help weeping sometimes when she was alone +and free to weep. They knew their Lord did not live in luxury, and a +secret gladness nestled in their hearts that they were allowed to +suffer a little with him for the sake of the flock he had given into +their charge.</p> + +<p>The children of course had to share in the general gloom, but it did +not trouble them much. For Clare, he was not easily troubled with +anything. Always ready to help, he did not much realize what suffering +was; and he had Mary to look after, which was labour and pleasure, +work and play and pay all in one. His mother was at ease concerning +her child when she knew her in Clare’s charge, and was free to attend +to her husband. She often said that if ever any were paid for being +good to themselves, she and her husband were vastly overpaid for +taking such a child from the shuddering arms of the earthquake.</p> + +<p>But John Porson’s hour was come. He must leave wife and children and +parish, and go to him who had sent him. If any one think it hard he +should so fare in doing his duty, let him be silent till he learn what +the parson himself thought of the matter when he got home. People talk +about death as the gosling might about life before it chips its +egg. Take up their way of lamentation, and we shall find it an +endless injustice to have to get up every morning and go to bed every +night. Mrs. Porson wept, but never thought him or herself +ill-used. And had she been low enough to indulge in self-pity, it +would have been thrown away, for before she had time to wonder how she +was to live and rear her children, she too was sent for. In this world +she was not one of those mothers of little faith who trust God for +themselves but not for their children, and when again with her +husband, she would not trust God less.</p> + +<p>Clare was in the garden when Sarah told him she was dead. He stood +still for a moment, then looked up, up into the blue. Why he looked +up, he could not have told; but ever since that terrible morning of +which the vague burning memory had never passed, when the great dome +into which he was gazing, burst and fell, he had a way every now and +then of standing still and looking up. His face was white. Two slow +tears gathered, rolled over, and dried upon his face. He turned to +Mary, lifted her in his arms, and, carrying her about the garden, once +more told her his strange version of what had happened in his +childhood. Then he told her that her papa and mamma had gone to look +for his papa and mamma—“somewhere up in the dome,” he said.</p> + +<p>When they wanted to take Mary to see what was left of her mother, the +boy contrived to prevent them. From morning till night he never lost +sight of the child.</p> + +<p>One cold noon in October, when the clouds were miles deep in front of +the sun, when the rain was falling thick on the yellow leaves, and all +the paths were miry, the two children sat by the kitchen fire. Sarah +was cooking their mid-day meal, which had come from her own +pocket. She was the only servant either of them had known in the +house, and she would not leave it until some one should take charge of +them. The neighbours, dreading infection, did not come near +them. Clare sat on a little stool with Mary on his knees, nestling in +his bosom; but he felt dreary, for he saw no love-firmament over him; +the cloud of death hid it.</p> + +<p>With a sudden jingle and rattle, up drove a rickety post-chaise to the +door of the parsonage. Out of it, and into the kitchen, came stalking +a tall middle-aged woman, in a long black cloak, black bonnet, and +black gloves, with a face at once stern and peevish.</p> + +<p>“I am the late Mrs. Porson’s sister,” she said, and stood.</p> + +<p>Sarah courtesied and waited. Clare rose, with Mary in his arms.</p> + +<p>“This is little Maly, ma’am,” he said, offering her the child.</p> + +<p>“Set her down, and let me see her,” she answered.</p> + +<p>Clare obeyed. Mary put her finger in her mouth, and began to cry. She +did not like the look of the black aunt, and was not used to a harsh +voice.</p> + +<p>“Tut! tut!” said the black aunt. “Crying already! That will never do! +Show me her things.”</p> + +<p>Sarah felt stunned. This was worse than death! “If only the mistress +had taken them with her!” she said to herself.</p> + +<p>Mary’s things—they were not many—were soon packed. Within an hour +she was borne off, shrieking, struggling, and calling “Clay.” The black +aunt, however,—as the black aunt Clare always thought of her—cared +nothing for her resistance; and Clare, who at her first cry was +rushing to the rescue, ready once more to do battle for her, was +seized and held back by Farmer Goodenough. Sarah had sent for him, and +he had come—just in time to frustrate Clare’s valour.</p> + +<p>The carriage was not yet out of sight, when Farmer Goodenough began to +repent that he had come: his presence was an acknowledgment of +responsibility! Something must be done with the foundling! There was +nobody to claim him, and nobody wanted him! He had always liked the +boy, but he did not want him! His wife was not fond of the boy, nor of +any boy, and did not want him! He had said to her that Clare could not +be left to starve, and she had answered, “Why not?”! What was to be +done with him? Nobody knew—any more than Clare himself. But which of +us knows what is going to be done with him?</p> + +<p>Clare was nobody’s business. English farmers no more than French are +proverbial for generosity; and Farmer Goodenough, no bad type of his +class, had a wife in whose thoughts not the pence but the farthings +dominated. She was one who at once recoiled and repelled—one of those +whose skin shrinks from the skin of their kind, and who are specially +apt to take unaccountable dislikes—a pitiable human animal of the +leprous sort. She “never took to the foundling,” she said. To have +neither father nor mother, she counted disreputable. But I believe the +main source of her dislike to Clare was a feeling of undefined reproof +in the very atmosphere of the boy’s presence, his nature was so +different from hers. What urged him toward his fellow-creatures, made +her draw back from him. In truth she hated the boy. The very look of +him made her sick, she said. It was only a certain respect for the +parson, and a certain fear of her husband, who, seldom angry, was yet +capable of fury, that had prevented her from driving the child, “with +his dish-clout face,” off the premises, whenever she saw him from door +or window. It was no wonder the farmer should be at his wits’ end to +know what, as churchwarden, guardian of the poor, and friend of the +late vicar—as friendly also to the boy himself—he was bound to do.</p> + +<p>“Where are <i>you</i> going?” he asked Sarah.</p> + +<p>“Where the Lord wills,” answered the old woman. Her ark had gone to +pieces, and she hardly cared what became of her.</p> + +<p>“We’ve got to look to ourselves!” said the farmer.</p> + +<p>“Parson used to say there was One as took that off our hands!” replied +Sarah.</p> + +<p>“Yes, yes,” assented Mr. Goodenough, fidgeting a little; “but the +Almighty helps them as helps themselves, and that’s sound +doctrine. You really must do something, Sarah! We can’t have you on +the parish, you know!”</p> + +<p>“I beg your pardon, sir, but until the child here is provided for, or +until they turn us out of the parsonage, I will not leave the place.”</p> + +<p>“The furniture is advertised for sale. You’ll have nothing but the +bare walls!”</p> + +<p>“We’ll manage to keep each other warm!—Shan’t we, Clare?”</p> + +<p>“I will try to keep you warm, Sarah,” responded the boy sadly.</p> + +<p>“But the new parson will soon be here. Our souls must be cared for!” +said the farmer.</p> + +<p>“Is the Lord’s child that came from heaven in an earthquake to be +turned out into the cold for fear the souls of big men should perish?”</p> + +<p>“Something must be done about it!” said the farmer. “What it’s to +be I can’t tell! It’s no business o’ mine any way!”</p> + +<p>“That’s what the priest, and the Levite, and the farmer says!” +returned Sarah.</p> + +<p>“Won’t you ask Mr. Goodenough to stay to dinner?” said Clare.</p> + +<p>He went up to the farmer, who in his perplexity had seated himself, +and laid his arm on his shoulder.</p> + +<p>“No, I can’t,” answered Sarah. “He would eat all we have, and not have +enough!”</p> + +<p>“Now Maly is gone,” returned Clare, “I would rather not have any +dinner.”</p> + +<p>The farmer’s old feeling for the boy, which the dread of having him +left on his hands had for the time dulled, came back.</p> + +<p>“Get him his dinner, Sarah,” he said. “I’ve something to see to in the +village. By the time I come back, he’ll be ready to go with me, +perhaps.”</p> + +<p>“God bless you, sir!” cried Sarah. “You meant it all the time, an’ I +been behavin’ like a brute!”</p> + +<p>The farmer did not like being taken up so sharply. He had promised +nothing! But he had nearly made up his mind that, as the friend of the +late parson, he could scarcely do less than give shelter to the child +until he found another refuge. True, he was not the parson’s child, +but he had loved him as his own! He would make the boy useful, and so +shut his wife’s mouth! There were many things Clare could do about the +place!</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XI">Chapter XI.<br><span class="smcap">Clare on the Farm.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>When Mr. Goodenough appeared at the house-door with the boy, his +wife’s face expressed what her tongue dared not utter without some +heating of the furnace behind it. But Clare never saw that he was +unwelcome. He had not begun to note outward and visible signs in +regard to his own species; his observation was confined to the +animals, to whose every motion and look he gave heed. But he was +hardly aware of watching even them: his love made it so natural to +watch, and so easy to understand them! He was not drawn to study +Mrs. Goodenough, or to read her indications; he was content to hear +what she said.</p> + +<p>True to her nature, Mrs. Goodenough, seeing she could not at once get +rid of the boy, did her endeavour to make him pay for his +keep. Nominally he continued to attend the village school, where the +old master was doing his best for him; but, oftener than not, she +interposed to prevent his going, and turned him to use about the +house, the dairy, and the poultry-yard.</p> + +<p>His new mode of life occasioned him no sense of hardship. I do not +mean because of his patient acceptance of everything that came; but +because he had been so long accustomed to the ways of a farm, to all +the phases of life and work in yard and field, that nothing there came +strange to him—except having to stick to what he was put to, and +having next to no time to read. Many boys who have found much +amusement in doing this or that, find it irksome the moment it is +required of them: Clare was not of that mean sort; he was a +gentleman. Happily he was put to no work beyond his strength.</p> + +<p>At first, and for some time, he had to do only with the creatures more +immediately under the care of “the mistress,” whence his acquaintance +with the poultry and the pigs, the pigeons and the calves—and +specially with such as were delicate or had been hurt—with their ways +of thinking and their carriage and conduct, rapidly increased.</p> + +<p>By and by, however, having already almost ceased to attend school, the +farmer, requiring some passing help a boy could give, took him from +his wife—not without complaint on her part, neither without sense of +relief, and would not part with him again. He was so quick in doing +what was required, so intelligent to catch the meaning not always +thoroughly expressed, so cheerful, and so willing, that he was a +pleasure to Mr. Goodenough—and no less a pleasure to the farmer that +dwelt in Mr. Goodenough, and seemed to most men all there was of him; +for, instead of an expense, he found him a saving.</p> + +<p>It was much more pleasant for Clare to be with his master than with +his mistress, but he fared the worse for it in the house. The woman’s +dislike of the boy must find outlet; and as, instead of flowing all +day long, it was now pent up the greater part of it, the stronger it +issued when he came home to his meals. I will not defile my page with +a record of the modes in which she vented her spite. It sought at +times such minuteness of indulgence, that it was next to impossible +for any one to perceive its embodiments except the boy himself.</p> + +<p>He now came more into contact with the larger animals about the place; +and the comfort he derived from them was greater than most people +would readily or perhaps willingly believe. He had kept up his +relations with Nimrod, the bull, and there was never a breach of the +friendship between them. The people about the farm not unfrequently +sought his influence with the animal, for at times they dared hardly +approach him. Clare even made him useful—got a little work out of him +now and then. But his main interest lay in the horses. He had up to +this time known rather less of them than of the other creatures on the +place; now he had to give his chief attention to them, laying in love +the foundation of that knowledge which afterward stood him in such +stead when he came to dwell for a time among certain eastern tribes +whose horses are their chief gladness and care. He used, when alone +with them, to talk to this one or that about the friends he had +lost—his father and mother and Maly and Sarah—and did not mind if +they all listened. He would even tell them sometimes about his own +father and mother—how the whole sky full of angels fell down upon +them and took them away. But he said most about his sister. For her he +mourned more than for any of the rest. Her screams as the black aunt +carried her away, would sometimes come back to him with such +verisimilitude of nearness, that, forgetting everything about him, he +would start to run to her. He felt somehow that it was well with the +others, but Maly had always needed <i>him</i>, and more than ever in the +last days of their companionship. He wept for nobody but Maly. In the +night he would wake up suddenly, thinking he heard her crying out for +him. Then he would get out of bed, creep to the stable, go to +Jonathan, and to him pour out his low-voiced complaint. Jonathan was +the biggest and oldest horse on the farm.</p> + +<p>How much he thought they understood of what he told them, I cannot +say. He was never silly; and where we cannot be sure, we may yet have +reason to hope. He believed they knew when he was in trouble, and +sympathized with him, and would gladly have relieved him of his +pain. I suspect most animals know something of the significance of +tears. More animals shed tears themselves than people think.</p> + +<p>For dogs, bless them, they are everywhere, and the boy had known them +from time immemorial.</p> + +<p>In the village, some of Clare’s old admirers began to remark that he +no longer “looked the little gentleman.” This was caused chiefly by +the state of his clothes. They were not fit for the work to which he +was put, and within a few weeks were very shabby. Besides, he was +growing rapidly, so that he and his garments were in too evident +process of parting company. Accustomed to a mother’s attentions, he +had never thought of his clothes except to take care of them for her +sake; now he tried to mend them, but soon found his labour of little +use. He had no wages to buy anything with. His clothes or his health +or his education were nothing to Mrs. Goodenough. It was no concern of +hers whether he looked decent or not. What right had such as he to +look decent? It was more than enough that she fed him! The shabbiness +of the beggarly creature was a consolation to her.</p> + +<p>But Clare’s toil in the open air, and his constant and willing +association with the animals, had begun to give him a bucolic +appearance. He grew a trifle browner, and showed here and there a +freckle. His health was splendid. Nothing seemed to hurt him. Hardship +was wholesome to him. To the eyes that hated him, and grudged the hire +of the mere food by which he grew, he seemed every day to enlarge +visibly. Already he gave promise of becoming a man of more than +ordinary strength and vigour. Possibly the animals gave him something.</p> + +<p>What may have been his outlook and hope all this time, who shall tell! +He never grumbled, never showed sign of pain or unwillingness, gave +his mistress no reason for fault-finding. She found it hard even to +discover a pretext. She seemed always ready to strike him, but was +probably afraid to do so without provocation her husband would count +sufficient. Clare never showed discomfort, never even sighed except he +were alone. Chequered as his life had been, if ever he looked forward +to a fresh change, it was but as a far possibility in the slow current +of events. But he was constantly possessed with a large dim sense of +something that lay beyond, waiting for him; something toward which the +tide of things was with certainty drifting him, but with which he had +nothing more to do than wait. He did not see that to do the things +given him to do was the only preparation for whatever, in the dim +under-world of the future, might be preparing for him; but he did feel +that he must do his work. He did not then think much about duty. He +was actively inclined, had a strong feeling for doing a thing as it +ought to be done; and was thoroughly loyal to any one that seemed to +have a right over him. In this blind, enduring, vaguely hopeful way, +he went on—sustained, and none the less certainly that he did not +know it, from the fountain of his life. When the winter came, his +sufferings, cared for as he had been, and accustomed to warmth and +softness, must at times have been considerable. In the day his work +was a protection, but at night the house was cold. He had, however, +plenty to eat, had no ailment, and was not to be greatly pitied.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XII">Chapter XII.<br><span class="smcap">Clare becomes a Guardian of the Poor.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Simpson, the bully of Clare’s childhood, went limping about on a +crutch, permanently lame, and full of hatred toward the innocent +occasion of the injury he had brought upon himself. Ever since his +recovery, he had, loitering about in idleness, watched the boy, to +waylay and catch him at unawares. Not until Clare went to the farm, +however, did he once succeed; for it was not difficult to escape him, +so long as he had not laid actual hold on his prey. But he grew more +and more cunning, and contrived at last, by creeping along hedges and +lying in ambush like a snake, to get his hands upon him. Then the poor +boy fared ill.</p> + +<p>He went home bleeding and torn. The righteous churchwarden rebuked him +with severity for fighting. His mistress told him she was glad he had +met with some one to give him what he deserved, for she could hardly +keep her hands off him. He stared at her with wondering eyes, but said +nothing. She turned from them: the devil in her could not look in the +eyes of the angel in him. The next time he fell into the snare of his +enemy, he managed to conceal what had befallen him. After that he was +too wide awake to be caught.</p> + +<p>There was in the village a child whom nobody heeded. He was far more +destitute than Clare, but had too much liberty. He lived with a +wretched old woman who called him her grandson: whether he was or not +nobody cared. She made her livelihood by letting beds, in a cottage, or +rather hovel, which seemed to be her own, to wayfarers, mostly tramps, +with or without trades. The child was thus thrown into the worst of +company, and learned many sorts of wickedness. He was already a thief, +and of no small proficiency in his art. Though village-bred, he could +pick a pocket more sensitive than a clown’s. Small and deft, he had +never stood before a magistrate. He was a miserable creature, +bare-footed and bare-legged; about eight years of age, but so stunted +that to the first glance he looked less than six—with keen ferret +eyes in red rims, red hair, pasty, freckled complexion, and a +generally unhealthy look; from which marks all, Clare conceived a +pitiful sympathy for him. Their acquaintance began thus:—</p> + +<p>One day, during his father’s last illness, he happened to pass the +door of the grandmother’s hovel while the crone was administering to +Tommy a severe punishment with a piece of thick rope: she had been +sharp enough to catch him stealing from herself. Clare heard his +cries. The door being partly open, he ran in, and gave him such +assistance that they managed to bolt together from the hut. A +friendship, for long almost a silent one, was thus initiated between +them. Tommy—Clare never knew his other name, nor did the boy +himself—would off and on watch for a sight of him all day long, but +had the instinct, or experience, never to approach him if any one was +with him. He was careful not to compromise him. The instant the most +momentary <i>tête-à-tête</i> was possible, he would rush up, offer him +something he had found or stolen, and hurry away again. That he was a +thief Clare had not the remotest suspicion. He had never offered him +anything to suggest theft.</p> + +<p>By and by it came to the knowledge of Clare’s enemy that there was a +friendship between them, and the discovery wrought direness for +both. One day Simpson saw Clare coming, and Tommy watching him. He +laid hold of Tommy, and began cuffing him and pulling his hair, to +make him scream, thinking thus to get hold of Clare. But +notwithstanding the lesson he had received, the rascal had not yet any +adequate notion of the boy’s capacity for action where another was +concerned. He flew to the rescue, caught up the crutch Simpson had +dropped, and laid it across his back with vigour. The fellow let Tommy +go and turned on Clare, who went backward, brandishing the crutch.</p> + +<p>“Run, Tommy,” he cried.</p> + +<p>Tommy retreated a few steps.</p> + +<p>“Run yourself,” he counselled, having reached a safe distance. “Take +his third leg with you.”</p> + +<p>Clare saw the advice was good, and ran. But the next moment reflection +showed him the helplessness of his enemy. He turned, and saw him +hobbling after him in such evident pain and discomfiture, that he went +to meet him, and politely gave him his crutch. He might have thrown it +to him and gone on, but he had a horror of rudeness, and handed it to +him with a bow. Just as he regained his perpendicular, the crutch +descended on his head, and laid him flat on the ground. There the +tyrant belaboured him. Tommy stood and regarded the proceeding.</p> + +<p>“The cove’s older an’ bigger an’ pluckier than me,” he said to +himself; “but he’s an ass. He’ll come to grief unless he’s looked +after. He’ll be hanged else. He don’t know how to dodge. I’ll have to +take him in charge!”</p> + +<p>When he saw Clare free, an event to which he had contributed nothing, +he turned and ran home.</p> + +<p>Simpson redoubled now his persecution of Clare, and persecuted Tommy +because of Clare. He lurked for Tommy now, and when he caught him, +tormented him with choice tortures. In a word, he made his life +miserable. After every such mischance Tommy would hurry to the farm, +and lie about in the hope of a sight of Clare, or possibly a chance of +speaking to him. His repute was so bad that he dared not show himself.</p> + +<p>Hot tears would come into Clare’s eyes as he listened to the not +always unembellished tale of Tommy’s sufferings at the hands of +Simpson; but he never thought of revenge, only of protection or escape +for the boy. It comforted him to believe that he was growing, and +would soon be a match for the oppressor.</p> + +<p>Whether at this time he felt any great interest in life, or recognized +any personal advantage in growing, I doubt. But he had the friendship +of the animals; and it is not surprising that creatures their maker +thinks worth making and keeping alive, should yield consolation to one +that understands them, or even fill with a mild joy the pauses of +labour in an irksome life.</p> + +<p>Then each new day was an old friend to the boy. Each time the sun +rose, new hope rose with him in his heart. He came every morning fresh +from home, with a fresh promise. The boy read the promise in his great +shining, and believed it; gazed and rejoiced, and turned to his work.</p> + +<p>But the hour arrived when his mistress could bear his presence no +longer. Some petty loss, I imagine, had befallen her. Nothing touched +her like the loss of money—the love of which is as dread a passion as +the love of drink, and more ruinous to the finer elements of the +nature. It was like the tearing out of her heart to Mrs. Goodenough to +lose a shilling. Her self-command forsook her, perhaps, in some such +moment of vexation; anyhow, she opened the sluices of her hate, and +overwhelmed him with it in the presence of her husband.</p> + +<p>The farmer knew she was unfair, knew the orphan a good boy and a +diligent, knew there was nothing against him but the antipathy of his +wife. But, annoyed with her injustice, he was powerless to change her +heart. Since the boy came to live with them, he had had no pleasure in +his wife’s society. She had always been moody and dissatisfied, but +since then had been unbearable. Constantly irritated with and by her +because of Clare, he had begun to regard him as the destroyer of his +peace, and to feel a grudge against him. He sat smouldering with +bodiless rage, and said nothing.</p> + +<p>Clare too was silent,—for what could he say? Where is the wisdom that +can answer hatred? He carried to his friend Jonathan a heart heavy and +perplexed.</p> + +<p>“Why does she hate me so, Jonathan?” he murmured.</p> + +<p>The big horse kissed his head all over, but made him no other answer.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XIII">Chapter XIII.<br><span class="smcap">Clare the Vagabond.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>The next morning Clare happened to do something not altogether to the +farmer’s mind. It was a matter of no consequence—only cleaning that +side of one of the cow-houses first which was usually cleaned last. He +gave him a box on the ear that made him stagger, and then stand +bewildered.</p> + +<p>“What do you mean by staring that way?” cried the farmer, annoyed with +himself and seeking justification in his own eyes. “Am I not to box +your ears when I choose?” And with that he gave him another blow.</p> + +<p>Then first it dawned on Clare that he was not wanted, that he was no +good to anybody. He threw down his scraper, and ran from the +cow-house; ran straight from the farm to the lane, and from the lane +to the high road. Buffets from the hand of his only friend, and the +sudden sense of loneliness they caused, for the moment bereft Clare of +purpose. It was as if his legs had run away with him, and he had +unconsciously submitted to their abduction.</p> + +<p>At the mouth of the lane, where it opened on the high road, he ran +against Tommy turning the corner, eager to find him. The eyes of the +small human monkey were swollen with weeping; his nose was bleeding, +and in size and shape scarce recognizable as a nose. At the sight, the +consciousness of his protectorate awoke in Clare, and he stopped, +unable to speak, but not unable to listen. Tommy blubbered out a +confused, half-inarticulate something about “granny and the other +devil,” who between them had all but killed him.</p> + +<p>“What can I do?” said Clare, his heart sinking with the sense of +having no help in him.</p> + +<p>Tommy was ready to answer the question. He had been hatching vengeance +all the way. Eagerly came his proposition—that they should, in their +turn, lie in ambush for Simpson, and knock his crutch from under +him. That done, Clare should belabour him with it, while he ran like +the wind and set his grandmother’s house on fire.</p> + +<p>“She’ll be drunk in bed, an’ she’ll be burned to death!” cried +Tommy. “Then we’ll mizzle!”</p> + +<p>“But it would hurt them both very badly, Tommy!” said Clare, as if +unfolding the reality of the thing to a foolish child.</p> + +<p>“Well! all right! the worse the better! Ain’t they hurt <i>us</i>?” rejoined +Tommy.</p> + +<p>“That’s how we know it’s not nice!” answered Clare. “If they set it a +going, we ain’t to keep it a going!”</p> + +<p>“Then they’ll be at it for ever,” cried Tommy, “an’ I’m sick of it! +I’ll <i>kill</i> granny! I swear I will, if I’m hanged for it! She’s said a +hundred times she’d pull my legs when I was hanged; but <i>she</i> won’t be +at the hanging!”</p> + +<p>“Why shouldn’t you run for it first?” said Clare. “Then they wouldn’t +want to hang you!”</p> + +<p>“Then I shouldn’t have nobody!” replied Tommy, whimpering.</p> + +<p>“I should have thought Nobody was as good as granny!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“A big bilin’ better!” answered Tommy bitterly. “I wasn’t meanin’ +granny—nor yet stumpin’ Simpson.”</p> + +<p>“I don’t know what you’re driving at,” said Clare. Tommy burst into +tears.</p> + +<p>“Ain’t you the only one I got, up or down?” he cried.</p> + +<p>Tommy had a little bit of heart—not much, but enough to have a chance +of growing. If ever creature had less than that, he was not human. I +do not think he could even be an ape.</p> + +<p>Some of the people about the parson used to think Clare had no heart, +and Mrs. Goodenough was sure of it. He had not a spark of gratitude, +she said. But the cause of this opinion was that Clare’s affection +took the shape of deeds far more than of words. Never were judges of +their neighbours more mistaken. The chief difference between Clare’s +history and that of most others was, that his began at the unusual +end. Clare began with loving everybody; and most people take a long +time to grow to that. Hence, those whom, from being brought nearest to +them, he loved specially, he loved without that outbreak of show which +is often found in persons who love but a few, and whose love is +defiled with partisanship. He loved quietly and constantly, in a +fashion as active as undemonstrative. He was always glad to be near +those he specially loved; beyond that, the signs of his love were +practical—it came out in ministration, in doing things for +them. There are those who, without loving, desire to be loved, because +they love themselves; for those that are worth least are most precious +to themselves. But Clare never thought of the love of others to +him—from no heartlessness, but that he did not think about +himself—had never done so, at least, until the moment when he fled +from the farm with the new agony in his heart that nobody wanted him, +that everybody would be happier without him. Happy is he that does not +think of himself before the hour when he becomes conscious of the +bliss of being loved. For it must be and ought to be a happy moment +when one learns that another human creature loves him; and not to be +grateful for love is to be deeply selfish. Clare had always loved, but +had not thought of any one as loving him, or of himself as being loved +by any one.</p> + +<p>“Well,” rejoined Clare, struggling with his misery, “ain’t I going +myself?”</p> + +<p>“You going!—That’s chaff!”</p> + +<p>“’Tain’t chaff. I’m on my way.”</p> + +<p>“What! Going to hook it? Oh golly! what a lark! Won’t Farmer +Goodenough look blue!”</p> + +<p>“He’ll think himself well rid of me,” returned Clare with a sigh. “But +there’s no time to talk. If you’re going, Tommy, come along.”</p> + +<p>He turned to go.</p> + +<p>“Where to?” asked Tommy, following.</p> + +<p>“I don’t know. Anywhere away,” answered Clare, quickening his pace.</p> + +<p>In spite of his swollen visage, Tommy’s eyes grew wider.</p> + +<p>“You ain’t cribbed nothing?” he said.</p> + +<p>“I don’t know what you mean.”</p> + +<p>“You ain’t stole something?” interpreted Tommy.</p> + +<p>Clare stopped, and for the first time on his own part, lifted his hand +to strike. It dropped immediately by his side.</p> + +<p>“No, you poor Tommy,” he said. “I don’t steal.”</p> + +<p>“Thought you didn’t! What are you running away for then?”</p> + +<p>“Because they don’t want me.”</p> + +<p>“Lord! what will you do?”</p> + +<p>“Work.”</p> + +<p>Tommy held his tongue: he knew a better way than that! If work was the +only road to eating, things would go badly with <i>him</i>! But he thought +he knew a thing or two, and would take his chance! There were degrees +of hunger that were not so bad as the thrashings he got, for in his +granny’s hands the rope might fall where it would; while all cripple +Simpson cared for was to make him squeal satisfactorily. But work was +worse than all! He would go with Clare, but not to work! Not he!</p> + +<p>Clare kept on in silence, never turning his head—out into the +untried, unknown, mysterious world, which lay around the one spot he +knew as the darkness lies about the flame of the candle. They walked +more than a mile before either spoke.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XIV">Chapter XIV.<br><span class="smcap">Their first Helper.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>It was a lovely spring morning. The sun was about thirty degrees above +the horizon, shining with a liquid radiance, as if he had already +drawn up and was shining through the dew of the morning, though it lay +yet on all the grasses by the roadside, turning them into gem-plants. +Every sort of gem sparkled on their feathery or beady tops, and their +long slender blades. At the first cottages they passed, the women were +beginning their day’s work, sweeping clean their floors and +door-steps. Clare noted that where were most flowers in the garden, +the windows were brightest, and the children cleanest.</p> + +<p>“The flowers come where they make things nice for them!” he said to +himself. “Where the flowers see dirt, they turn away, and won’t come +out.”</p> + +<p>From childhood he had had the notion that the flowers crept up inside +the stalks until they found a window to look out at. Where the +prospect was not to their mind they crept down, and away by some door +in the root to try again. For all the stalks stood like watch-towers, +ready for them to go up and peep out.</p> + +<p>They came to a pond by a farm-house. Clare had been observing with +pity how wretched Tommy’s clothes were; but when he looked into the +pond he saw that his own shabbiness was worse than Tommy’s downright +miserableness. Nobody would leave either of them within reach of +anything worth stealing! What he wore had been his Sunday suit, and it +was not even worth brushing!</p> + +<p>“I’m ’orrid ’ungry,” said Tommy. “I ain’t swallered a plug this +mornin’, ’xcep’ a lump o’ bread out o’ granny’s cupboard. That’s what +I got my weltin’ for. It were a whole half-loaf, though—an’ none so +dry!”</p> + +<p>Clare had eaten nothing, and had been up since five o’clock—at work +all the time till the farmer struck him: he was quite as hungry as +Tommy. What was to be done? Besides a pocket-handkerchief he had but +one thing alienable.</p> + +<p>The very day she was taken ill, he had been in the store-room with his +mother, and she, knowing the pleasure he took in the scent of brown +Windsor-soap, had made him a present of a small cake. This he had kept +in his pocket ever since, wrapt in a piece of rose-coloured paper, his +one cherished possession: hunger deadening sorrow, the time was come +to bid it farewell. His heart ached to part with it, but Tommy and he +were so hungry!</p> + +<p>They went to the door of the house, and knocked—first Clare very +gently, then Tommy with determination. It was opened by a matron who +looked at them over the horizon of her chin.</p> + +<p>“Please, ma’am,” said Clare, “will you give us a piece of bread?—as +large a piece, please, as you can spare; and I will give you this +piece of brown Windsor-soap.”</p> + +<p>As he ended his speech, he took a farewell whiff of his favourite +detergent.</p> + +<p>“Soap!” retorted the dame. “Who wants your soap! Where did you get it? +Stole it, I don’t doubt! Show it here.”</p> + +<p>She took it in her hand, and held it to her nose.</p> + +<p>“Who gave it you?”</p> + +<p>“My mother,” answered Clare.</p> + +<p>“Where’s your mother?”</p> + +<p>Clare pointed upward.</p> + +<p>“Eh? Oh—hanged! I thought, so!”</p> + +<p>She threw the soap into the yard, and closed the door. Clare darted +after his property, pounced upon it, and restored it lovingly to his +pocket.</p> + +<p>As they were leaving the yard disconsolate, they saw a cart full of +turnips. Tommy turned and made for it.</p> + +<p>“Don’t, Tommy,” cried Clare.</p> + +<p>“Why not? I’m hungry,” answered Tommy, “an’ you see it’s no use +astin’!”</p> + +<p>He flew at the cart, but Clare caught and held him.</p> + +<p>“They ain’t ours, Tommy,” he said.</p> + +<p>“Then why don’t you take one?” retorted Tommy.</p> + +<p>“That’s why you shouldn’t.”</p> + +<p>“It’s why you should, for then it ’ud be yours.”</p> + +<p>“To take it wouldn’t make it ours, Tommy.”</p> + +<p>“Wouldn’t it, though? I believe when I’d eaten it, it would be +mine—rather!”</p> + +<p>“No, it wouldn’t. Think of having in your stomach what wasn’t yours! +No, you must pay for it. Perhaps they would take my soap for a +turnip. I believe it’s worth two turnips.”</p> + +<p>He spied a man under a shed, ran to him, and made offer of the soap +for a turnip apiece.</p> + +<p>“I don’t want your soap,” answered the man, “an’ I don’t recommend +cold turmits of a mornin’. But take one if you like, and clear +out. The master’s cart-whip ’ill be about your ears the moment he sees +you!”</p> + +<p>“Ain’t you the master, sir?”</p> + +<p>“No, I ain’t.”</p> + +<p>“Then the turnips ain’t yours?” said Clare, looking at him with +hungry, regretful eyes, for he could have eaten a raw potato.</p> + +<p>“You’re a deal too impudent to be hungry!” said the man, making a blow +at him with his open hand, which Clare dodged. “Be off with you, or +I’ll set the dog on you.”</p> + +<p>“I’m very sorry,” said Clare. “I did not mean to offend you.”</p> + +<p>“Clear out, I say. Double trot!”</p> + +<p>Hungry as the boys were, they must trudge! No bread, no turnip for +them! Nothing but trudge, trudge till they dropped!</p> + +<p>When they had gone about five miles further, they sat down, as if by +common consent, on the roadside; and Tommy, used to crying, began to +cry. Clare did not seek to stop him, for some instinct told him it +must be a relief.</p> + +<p>By and by a working-man came along the road. Clare hesitated, but +Tommy’s crying urged him. He rose and stood ready to accost him. As +soon as he came up, however, the man stopped of himself. He questioned +Clare and listened to his story, then counselled the boys to go back.</p> + +<p>“I’m not wanted, sir,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“They’d kill <i>me</i>,” said Tommy.</p> + +<p>“God help you, boys!” returned the man. “You may be telling me lies, +and you may be telling me the truth!—A liar may be hungry, but +somehow I grudge my dinner to a liar!”</p> + +<p>As he spoke he untied the knots of a blue handkerchief with white +spots, gave them its contents of bread and cheese, wiped his face with +it, and put it in his pocket; lifted his bag of tools, and went his +way. He had lost his dinner and saved his life!</p> + +<p>The dinner, being a man’s, went a good way toward satisfying them, +though empty corners would not have been far to seek, had there been +anything to put in them. As it was, they started again refreshed and +hopeful. What had come to them once might reasonably come again!</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XV">Chapter XV.<br><span class="smcap">Their first Host.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>As the evening drew on, and began to settle down into night, a new +care arose in the mind of the elder boy. Where were they to pass the +darkness?—how find shelter for sleep? It was a question that gave +Tommy no anxiety. He had been on the tramp often, now with one party, +now with another of his granny’s lodgers, and had frequently slept in +the open air, or under the rudest covert. Tommy had not much +imagination to trouble him, and in his present moral condition was +possibly better without it; but to inexperienced Clare there was +something fearful in having the night come so close to him. Sleep out +of doors he had never thought of. To lie down with the stars looking +at him, nothing but the blue wind between him and them, was like being +naked to the very soul. Doubtless there would be creatures about, to +share the night with him, and protect him from its awful bareness; but +they would be few for the size of the room, and he might see none of +them! It was the sense of emptiness, the lack of present life that +dismayed him. He had never seen any creatures to shrink from. He +disliked no one of the things that creep or walk or fly. Before long +he did come to know and dislike at least one sort; and the sea held +creatures that in after years made him shudder; but as yet, not even +rats, so terrible to many, were a terror to Clare. It was Nothing that +he feared.</p> + +<p>My reader may say, “But had no one taught him about God?” Yes, he had +heard about God, and about Jesus Christ; had heard a great deal about +them. But they always seemed persons a long way off. He knew, or +thought he knew, that God was everywhere, but he had never felt his +presence a reality. He seemed in no place where Clare’s eyes ever +fell. He never thought, “God is here.” Perhaps the sparrows knew more +about God than he did then. When he looked out into the night it +always seemed vacant, therefore horrid, and he took it for as empty as +it looked. And if there had been no God there, it would have been +reasonable indeed to be afraid; for the most frightful of notions is +<i>Nothing-at-all</i>.</p> + +<p>It grew dark, and they were falling asleep on their walking legs, when +they came to a barn-yard. Very glad were they to creep into it, and +search for the warmest place. It was a quiet part of the country, and +for years nothing had been stolen from anybody, so that the people +were not so watchful as in many places.</p> + +<p>They went prowling about, but even Tommy had innocent intent, eager +only after a little warmth, and as much sleep as they could find; they +came at length to an open window, through which they crawled into +what, by the smell and the noises, they knew to be a stable. It was +very dark, but Clare was at home, and felt his way about; while Tommy, +who was afraid of the horses, held close to him. Clare’s hand fell +upon the hind-quarters of a large well-fed horse. The huge animal was +asleep standing, but at the touch of the small hand he gave a low +whinny. Tommy shuddered at the sound.</p> + +<p>“He’s pleased,” said Clare, and crept up on his near side into the +stall. There he had soon made such friends with him, that he did not +hesitate to get in among the hay the horse had for his supper.</p> + +<p>“Here, Tommy!” he cried in a whisper; “there’s room for us both in the +manger.”</p> + +<p>But Tommy stood shaking. He fancied the darkness full of horses’ +heads, and would not stir. Clare had to get out again, and search for +a place to suit his fancy, which he found in an untenanted loose-box, +with remains of litter. There Tommy coiled himself up, and was soon +fast asleep.</p> + +<p>Clare returned to the hospitality of the big horse. The great nostrils +snuffed him over and over as he lay, and the boy knew the horse made +him welcome. He dropped asleep stroking the muzzle of his +chamber-fellow, and slept all the night, kept warm by the horse’s +breath, and the near furnace of his great body.</p> + +<p>In the morning the boys found they had slept too long, for they were +discovered. But though they were promptly ejected as vagabonds, and +not without a few kicks and cuffs, these were not administered without +the restraint of some mercy, for their appearance tended to move pity +rather than indignation.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XVI">Chapter XVI.<br><span class="smcap">On the Tramp.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>With the new day came the fresh necessity for breakfast, and the fresh +interest in the discovery of it. But breakfast is a thing not always +easiest to find where breakfasts most abound; nor was theirs when +found that morning altogether of a sort to be envied, ill as they +could afford to despise it. Passing, on their goal-less way, a +flour-mill, the door of which was half-open, they caught sight of a +heap, whether floury dust or dusty flour, it would have been hard to +say, that seemed waiting only for them to help themselves from +it. Fain to still the craving of birds too early for any worm, they +swallowed a considerable portion of it, choking as it was, nor met +with rebuke. There was good food in it, and they might have fared +worse.</p> + +<p>Another day’s tramp was thus inaugurated. How it was to end no one in +the world knew less than the trampers.</p> + +<p>Before it was over, a considerable change had passed upon Clare; for a +new era was begun in his history, and he started to grow more +rapidly. Hitherto, while with his father or mother, or with his little +sister, making life happy to her—even while at the farm, doing hard +work—he had lived with much the same feeling with which he read a +story: he was in the story, half dreaming, half acting it. The +difference between a thing that passed through his brain from the +pages of a book, or arose in it as he lay in bed either awake or +asleep, and the thing in which he shared the life and motion of the +day, was not much marked in his consciousness. He was a dreamer with +open eyes and ready hands, not clearly distinguishing thought and +action, fancy and fact. Even the cold and hunger he had felt at the +farm had not sufficed to wake him up; he had only had to wait and they +were removed. But now that he did not know whence his hunger was to be +satisfied, or where shelter was to be had; now also that there was a +hunger outside him, and a cold that was not his, which yet he had to +supply and to frustrate in the person of Tommy, life began to grow +real to him; and, which was far more, he began to grow real to +himself, as a power whose part it was to encounter the necessities +thus presented. He began to understand that things were required of +him. He had met some of these requirements before, and had satisfied +them, but without knowing them as requirements. He did it half awake, +not as a thinking and willing source of the motion demanded. He did it +all by impulse, hardly by response. Now we are put into bodies, and +sent into the world, to wake us up. We might go on dreaming for ages +if we were left without bodies that the wind could blow upon, that the +rain could wet, and the sun scorch, bodies to feel thirst and cold and +hunger and wounds and weariness. The eternal plan was beginning to +tell upon Clare. He was in process of being changed from a dreamer to +a man. It is a good thing to be a dreamer, but it is a bad thing +indeed to be <i>only</i> a dreamer. He began to see that everybody in the +world had to do something in order to get food; that he had worked for +the farmer and his wife, and they had fed him. He had worked willingly +and eaten gladly, but had not before put the two together. He saw now +that men who would be men must work.</p> + +<p>His eyes fell upon a congregation of rooks in a field by the +roadside. “Are <i>they</i> working?” he thought; “or are they stealing? If +it be stealing they are at, it looks like hard work as well. It can’t +be stealing though; they were made to live, and <i>how</i> are they to live +if they don’t grub? that’s their work! Still the corn ain’t theirs! +Perhaps it’s only worms they take! Are the worms theirs? A man should +die rather than steal, papa said. But, if they are stealing, the crows +don’t know it; and if they don’t know it, they ain’t thieves! Is that +it?”</p> + +<p>The same instant came the report of a gun. A crowd of rooks rose +cawing. One of them dropped and lay.</p> + +<p>“He must have been stealing,” thought Clare, “for see what comes of +it! Would they shoot me if I stole? Better be shot than die of hunger! +Yes, but better die of hunger than be a thief!”</p> + +<p>He had read stories about thieves and honest boys, and had never seen +any difficulty in the matter. Nor had he yet a notion of how difficult +it is not to be a thief—that is, to be downright honest. If anybody +thinks it easy, either he has not known much of life, or he has never +tried to be honest; he has done just like other people. Clare did not +know that many a boy whose heart sided with the honest boy in the +story, has grown up a dishonourable man—a man ready to benefit +himself to the disadvantage of others; that many a man who passes for +respectable in this disreputable world, is counted far meaner than a +thief in the next, and is going there to be put in prison. But he +began to see that it is not enough to mean well; that he must be +sharp, and mind what he was about; else, with hunger worrying inside +him, he might be a thief before he knew. He was on the way to discover +that to think rightly—to be on the side of what is honourable when +reading a story, is a very different thing from doing right, and being +honourable, when the temptation is upon us. Many a boy when he reads +this will say, “Of course it is!” and when the time comes, will be a +sneak.</p> + +<p>Those crows set Clare thinking; and it was well; for if he had not +done as those thinkings taught him, he would have given a very +different turn to his history. Meditation and resolve, on the top of +honourable habit, brought him to this, that, when he saw what was +right, he just did it—did it without hesitation, question, or +struggle. Every man must, who would be a free man, who would not be +the slave of the universe and of himself.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XVII">Chapter XVII.<br><span class="smcap">The Baker’s Cart.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>The sweepings of the mill-floor did not last them long, and by the +time they saw rising before them the spires and chimneys of the small +county town to which the road had been leading them, they were very +hungry indeed—as hungry as they well could be without having begun to +grow faint. The moment he saw them, Clare began revolving in his mind +once more, as many times on the way, what he was to do to get work: +Tommy of course was too small to do anything, and Clare must earn +enough for both. He could think of nothing but going into the shops, +or knocking at the house-doors, and asking for something to do. So +filled was he with his need of work, and with the undefined sense of a +claim for work, that he never thought how much against him must be the +outward appearance which had so dismayed himself when he saw it in the +pond; never thought how unwilling any one would be to employ him, or +what a disadvantage was the company of Tommy, who had every mark of a +born thief.</p> + +<p>I do not know if, on his tramps, Tommy had been in a town before, but +to Clare all he saw bore the aspect of perfect novelty, +notwithstanding the few city-shapes that floated in faintest shadow, +like memories of old dreams, in his brain. He was delighted with the +grand look of the place, with its many people and many shops. His hope +of work at once became brilliant and convincing.</p> + +<p>Noiselessly and suddenly Tommy started from his side, but so much +occupied was he with what he beheld and what he thought, that he +neither saw him go nor missed him when gone. He became again aware of +him by finding himself pulled toward the entrance of a narrow lane. +Tommy pulled so hard that Clare yielded, and went with him into the +lane, but stopped immediately. For he saw that Tommy had under his arm +a big loaf, and the steam of newly-baked bread was fragrant in his +nostrils. Never smoke so gracious greeted those of incense-loving +priest. Tommy tugged and tugged, but Clare stood stock-still.</p> + +<p>“Where did you get that beautiful loaf, Tommy?” he asked.</p> + +<p>“Off on a baker’s cart,” said Tommy. “Don’t be skeered; he never saw +me! That was my business, an’ I seed to ’t.”</p> + +<p>“Then you stole it, Tommy?”</p> + +<p>“Yes,” grumbled Tommy, “—if that’s the name you put upon it when your +trousers is so slack you’ve got to hold on to them or they’d trip you +up!”</p> + +<p>“Where’s the cart?”</p> + +<p>“In the street there.”</p> + +<p>“Come along.”</p> + +<p>Clare took the loaf from Tommy, and turned to find the baker’s +cart. Tommy’s face fell, and he was conscious only of bitterness. Why +had he yielded to sentiment—not that he knew the word—when he longed +like fire to bury his sharp teeth in that heavenly loaf? Love—not to +mention a little fear—had urged him to carry it straight to Clare, +and this was his reward! He was going to give him up to the baker! +There was gratitude for you! He ought to have known better than trust +<i>anybody</i>, even Clare! Nobody was to be trusted but yourself! It did +seem hard to Tommy.</p> + +<p>They had scarcely turned the corner when they came upon the cart. The +baker was looking the other way, talking to some one, and Clare +thought to lay down the loaf and say nothing about it: there was no +occasion for the ceremony of apology where offence was unknown. But in +the very act the baker turned and saw him. He sprang upon him, and +collared him. The baker was not nice to look at.</p> + +<p>“I have you!” he cried, and shook him as if he would have shaken his +head off.</p> + +<p>“It’s quite a mistake, sir!” was all Clare could get out, so fierce +was the earthquake that rattled the house of his life.</p> + +<p>“Mistaken am I? I like that!—Police!”</p> + +<p>And with that the baker shook him again.</p> + +<p>A policeman was not far off; he heard the man call, and came running.</p> + +<p>“Here’s a gen’leman as wants the honour o’ your acquaintance, Bob!” +said the baker.</p> + +<p>But Tommy saw that, from his size, he was more likely to get off than +Clare if he told the truth.</p> + +<p>“Please, policeman,” he said, “it wasn’t him; it was me as took the +loaf.”</p> + +<p>“You little liar!” shouted the baker. “Didn’t I see him with his hand +on the loaf?”</p> + +<p>“He was a puttin’ of it back,” said Tommy. “I wish he’d been +somewheres else! See what he been an’ got by it! If he’d only ha’ let +me run, there wouldn’t ha’ been nobody the wiser. I <i>am</i> sorry I +didn’t run. Oh, I <i>ham</i> so ’ungry!”</p> + +<p>Tommy doubled himself up, with his hands inside the double.</p> + +<p>“’Ungry, are you?” roared the baker. “That’s what thieves off a +baker’s cart ought to be! They ought to be always ’ungry—’ungry to +all eternity, they ought! An’ that’s what’s goin’ to be done to ’em!”</p> + +<p>“Look here!” cried a pale-faced man in the front of the crowd, who +seemed a mechanic. “There’s a way of tellin’ whether the boy’s +speakin’ the truth <i>now</i>!”</p> + +<p>He caught up the restored loaf, halved it cleverly, and handed each of +the boys a part.</p> + +<p>“Now, baker, what’s to pay?” he said, and drew himself up, for the man +was too angry at once to reply.</p> + +<p>The boys were tearing at the delicious bread, blind and deaf to all +about them.</p> + +<p>“P’r’aps you would like to give <i>me</i> in charge?” pursued their +saviour.</p> + +<p>“Sixpence,” said the man sullenly.</p> + +<p>The mechanic laid sixpence on the cover of the cart.</p> + +<p>“I ought to ha’ made you weigh and make up,” he said. “Where’s your +scales?”</p> + +<p>“Mind your own business.”</p> + +<p>“I mean to. Here! I want another sixpenny loaf—but I want it weighed +this time!”</p> + +<p>“I ain’t bound to sell bread in the streets. You can go to the +shop. Them loaves is for reg’lar customers.”</p> + +<p>He moved off with his cart, and the crowd began to disperse. The boys +stood absorbed, each in what remained of his half-loaf.</p> + +<p>When he looked up, Clare saw that they were alone. But he caught sight +of their benefactor some way off, and ran after him.</p> + +<p>“Oh, sir!” he said, “I was so hungry, I don’t know whether I thanked +you for the loaf. We’d had nothing to-day but the sweepings of a +mill.”</p> + +<p>“God bless my soul!” said the man. “People say there’s a God!” he +added.</p> + +<p>“I think there must be, sir, for you came by just then!” returned +Clare.</p> + +<p>“How do you come to be so hard-up, my boy? Somebody’s to blame +somewheres!”</p> + +<p>“There ain’t no harm in being hungry, so long as the loaf comes!” +rejoined Clare. “When I get work we shall be all right!”</p> + +<p>“That’s your sort!” said the man. “But if there had been a God, as +people say, he would ha’ made me fit to gi’e you a job, i’stead o’ +stan’in’ here as you see me, with ne’er a turn o’ work to do for +myself!”</p> + +<p>“I’ll work my hardest to pay you back your sixpence,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“Nay, nay, lad! Don’t you trouble about that. I ha’ got two or three +more i’ my pocket, thank God!”</p> + +<p>“You have two Gods, have you, sir?” said Clare; “—one who does things +for you, and one who don’t?”</p> + +<p>“Come, you young shaver! you’re too much for me!” said the man +laughing.</p> + +<p>Tommy, having finished his bread, here thought fit to join them. He +came slyly up, looking impudent now he was filled, with his hands +where his pockets should have been.</p> + +<p>“It was you stole the loaf, you little rascal!” said the workman, +seeing thief in every line of the boy.</p> + +<p>“Yes,” answered Tommy boldly, “an’ I don’t see no harm. The baker had +lots, and he wasn’t ’ungry! It was Clare made a mull of it! He’s such +a duffer you don’t know! He acshally took it back to the brute! He +deserved what he got! The loaf was mine. It wasn’t his! <i>I</i> stole it!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, ho! it wasn’t his! it was yours, was it?—Why do you go about +with a chap like this, young gentleman?” said the man, turning to +Clare. “I know by your speech you ain’t been brought up alongside o’ +sech as him!”</p> + +<p>“I had to go away, and he came with me,” answered Clare.</p> + +<p>“You’d better get rid of him. He’ll get you into trouble.”</p> + +<p>“I can’t get rid of him,” replied Clare. “But I shall teach him not to +take what isn’t his. He don’t know better now. He’s been ill-used all +his life.”</p> + +<p>“You don’t seem over well used yourself,” said the man.</p> + +<p>He saw that Clare’s clothes had been made for a boy in good +circumstances, though they had been long worn, and were much +begrimed. His face, his tone, his speech convinced him that they had +been made for <i>him</i>, and that he had had a gentle breeding.</p> + +<p>“Look you here, young master,” he continued; “you have no right to be +in company with that boy. He’ll bring you to grief as sure as I tell +you.”</p> + +<p>“I shall be able to bear it,” answered Clare with a sigh.</p> + +<p>“He’ll be the loss of your character to you.”</p> + +<p>“I ain’t got a character to lose,” replied Clare. “I thought I had; +but when nobody will believe me, where’s my character then?”</p> + +<p>“Now you’re wrong there,” returned the man. “I’m not much, I know; but +I believe every word you say, and should be very sorry to find myself +mistaken.”</p> + +<p>“Thank you, sir,” said Clare. “May I carry your bag for you?”</p> + +<p>If Clare had seen what then passed in Tommy’s mind, at the back of +those glistening ferret-eyes of his, he would have been almost +reconciled to taking the man’s advice, and getting rid of him. Tommy +was saying to himself that his pal wasn’t such a duffer after all—he +was on the lay for the man’s tools!</p> + +<p>Tommy never reasoned except in the direction of cunning self-help—of +fitting means and intermediate ends to the one main object of +eating. It is wonderful what a sharpener of the poor wits hunger is!</p> + +<p>“I guess I’m the abler-bodied pauper!” answered the man; and picking +up the bag he had dropped at his feet while they conversed, he walked +away.</p> + +<p>There are many more generous persons among the poor than among the +rich—a fact that might help some to understand how a rich man should +find it hard to enter into the kingdom of heaven. It is hard for +everybody, but harder for the rich. Men who strive to make money are +unconsciously pulling instead of pushing at the heavy gate of the +kingdom.</p> + +<p>“Tommy!” said Clare, in a tone new to himself, for a new sense of +moral protection had risen in him, “if ever you steal anything again, +either I give you a hiding, or you and I part company.”</p> + +<p>Tommy bored his knuckles into his red eyes, and began to +whimper. Again it was hard for Tommy! He had followed Clare, thinking +to supply what was lacking to him; to do for him what he was not +clever enough to do for himself; in short, to make an advantageous +partnership with him, to which he should furnish the faculty of +picking up unconsidered trifles. Tommy judged Clare defective in +intellect, and quite unpractical. He was of the mind of the +multitude. The common-minded man always calls the man who thinks of +righteousness before gain, who seeks to do the will of God and does +not seek to make a fortune, unpractical. He <i>will</i> not see that the +very essence of the practical lies in doing the right thing.</p> + +<p>Tommy, in a semi-conscious way, had looked to Clare to supply the +strength and the innocent look, while he supplied the head and the +lively fingers; and here was Clare knocking the lovely plan to pieces! +He did well to be angry! But Clare was the stronger; and Tommy knew +that when Clare was roused, though it was not easy to rouse him, he +could and would and did fight—not, indeed, as the little coward said +to himself <i>he</i> could fight, like a wild cat—but like a blundering +hornless old cow defending her calf from a cur.</p> + +<p>In the heart of all his selfishness, however, Tommy did a little love +Clare; and his love came, not from Tommy, but from the same source as +his desire for food, namely, from the God that was in Tommy, the God +in whom Tommy lived and had his being with Clare. Whether Tommy’s love +for Clare would one day lift him up beside Clare, that is, make him an +honest boy like Clare, remained to be seen.</p> + +<p>Finding his demonstration make no impression, Tommy took his knuckles +out of his eye-holes and thrust them into his pocket-holes, turned his +back on his friend, and began to whistle—with a lump of self-pity in +his throat.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XVIII">Chapter XVIII.<br><span class="smcap">Beating the Town.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>They turned their faces again toward the centre of the town, and +resumed their walk, taking in more of what they saw than while they +had not yet had the second instalment of their daily bread. What a +thing is food! It is the divineness of the invention—the need for the +food, and the food for the need—that makes those who count their +dinner the most important thing in the day, such low creatures: +nothing but what is good in itself can be turned into vileness. It is +a delight to see a boy with a good honest appetite; a boy that <i>loves</i> +his dinner is a loathsome creature. Eat heartily, my boy, but be ready +to share, even when you are hungry, and have only what you could eat +up yourself, else you are no man. Remember that you created neither +your hunger nor your food; that both came from one who cares for you +and your neighbours as well.</p> + +<p>In the strength of the half-loaf he had eaten, the place looked to +Clare far more wonderful, and his hopes of earning his bread grew yet +more radiant. But he passed one shop after another, and always +something prevented him from going in. One after another did not look +just the right sort, did not seem to invite him: the next might be +better! I dare say but for that half-loaf, he would have made a trial +sooner, but I doubt if he would have succeeded sooner. He did not +think of going to parson, doctor, or policeman for advice; he went +walking and staring, followed by Tommy with his hands in his +pocketless pocket-holes. Clare was not yet practical in device, though +perfect in willingness, and thorough in design. Up one street and down +another they wandered, seeing plenty of food through windows, and in +carts and baskets, but never any coming their way, except in the form +of tempting odours that issued from almost every house, and grew in +keenness and strength toward one o’clock. Oh those odours!—agonizing +angels of invisible yet most material good! Of what joys has not the +Father made us capable, when the poorest necessity is linked with such +pain! What a tormenting thing—and what a good must be meant to come +out of it!—to be hungry, downright, cravingly hungry with the whole +microcosm, and not a halfpenny to buy a mouthful of assuagement!—to +be assailed with wafts of deliriously undefined promise, not one of +which seems likely to be fulfilled!—promise true to men hurrying home +to dinner or luncheon, but only rousing greater desire in such as +Clare and Tommy. Not one opportunity of appropriation presented +itself, else it would have gone ill with Tommy, now that the eyes and +ears of his guardian were on the alert. For Clare thought of him now +as a little thievish pup, for whose conduct, manners, and education he +was responsible.</p> + +<p>The agony began at length to abate—ready to revive with augmented +strength when the next hour for supplying the human furnace should +begin to approach. Few even of those who know what hunger is, +understand to what it may grow—how desire becomes longing, longing +becomes craving, and craving a wild passion of demand. It must be +terrible to be hungry, and not know God!</p> + +<p>As the evening came down upon them, worn out, faint with want, +shivering with cold, and as miserable in prospect as at the moment, +yet another need presented itself with equally imperative +requisition—that of shelter that they might rest. It was even more +imperative: they could not eat; they <i>must</i> lie down!</p> + +<p>Whether it be a rudiment retained from their remote ancestry, I cannot +tell, but any kind of suffering will wake in some a masterful impulse +to burrow; and as the boys walked about in their misery, white with +cold and hunger, Clare’s eyes kept turning to every shallowest +archway, every breach in wall or hedge that seemed to offer the least +chance of covert, while, every now and then, Tommy would bolt from his +side to peer into some opening whose depth was not immediately patent +to his ferret-gaze. Once, in a lane on the outskirts of the town, he +darted into a narrow doorway in the face of a wall, but instantly +rushed back in horror: within was a well, where water lay still and +dark. Then first Clare had a hint of the peculiar dread Tommy had of +water, especially of water dark and unexpected. Possibly he had once +been thrown into such water to be got rid of. But Clare at the moment +was too weary to take much notice of his dismay.</p> + +<p>It was an old town in which they were wandering, and change in the +channels of traffic had so turned its natural nourishment aside, that +it was in parts withering and crumbling away. Not a few of the houses +were, some from poverty, some from utter disuse, yielding fast to +decay. But there were other causes for the condition of one, which, +almost directly they came out of the lane I have just mentioned, into +the end of a wide silent street, drew the roving, questing eyes of +Clare and Tommy. The moon was near the full and shining clear, so that +they could perfectly see the state it was in. Most of its windows were +broken; its roof was like the back of a very old horse; its +chimney-pots were jagged and stumped with fracture; from one of them, +by its entangled string, the skeleton of a kite hung half-way down the +front. But, notwithstanding such signs of neglect, the red-brick wall +and the wrought-iron gate, both seven feet high, that shut the place +off from the street, stood in perfect aged strength. The moment they +saw it, the house seemed to say to them, “There’s nobody here: come +in!” but the gate and the wall said, “Begone!”</p> + +<hr class="x-ebookmaker-drop"> +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2 id="Chapter_XIX">Chapter XIX.<br> +<span class="smcap">The Blacksmith and his Forge.</span></h2> +</div> + + +<p>At the end of the wall was a rough boarded fence, in contact with it, +and reaching, some fifty yards or so, to a hovel in which a +blacksmith, of unknown antecedents, had taken possession of a forsaken +forge, and did what odd jobs came in his way. The boys went along the +fence till they came to the forge, where, looking in, they saw the +blacksmith working his bellows. To one with the instincts of Clare’s +birth and breeding, he did not look a desirable acquaintance. Tommy +was less fastidious, but he felt that the scowl on the man’s brows +boded little friendliness. Clare, however, who hardly knew what fear +was, did not hesitate to go in, for he was drawn as with a cart-rope +by the glow of the fire, and the sparks which, as they gazed, began, +like embodied joys, to fly merrily from the iron. Tommy followed, +keeping Clare well between him and the black-browed man, who rained +his blows on the rosy iron in his pincers, as if he hated it.</p> + +<p>“What do you want, gutter-toads?” he cried, glancing up and seeing +them approach. “This ain’t a hotel.”</p> + +<figure class="figcenter illowp47" id="003" style="max-width: 39.3125em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/003.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">The blacksmith gives Clare and Tommy a rough greeting.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>“But it’s a splendid fire,” rejoined Clare, looking into his face with +a wan smile, “and we’re so cold!”</p> + +<p>“What’s that to me!” returned the man, who, savage about something, +was ready to quarrel with anything. “I didn’t make my fire to warm +little devils that better had never been born!”</p> + +<p>“No, sir,” answered Clare; “but I don’t think we’d better not have +been born. We’re both cold, and nobody but Tommy knows how hungry I +am; but your fire is so beautiful that, if you would let us stand +beside it a minute or two, we wouldn’t at all mind.”</p> + +<p>“Mind, indeed! Mind what, you preaching little humbug?”</p> + +<p>“Mind being born, sir.”</p> + +<p>“Why do you say <i>sir</i> to me? Don’t you see I’m a working man?”</p> + +<p>“Yes, and that’s why. I think we ought to say <i>sir</i> and <i>ma’am</i> to +every one that can do something we can’t. Tommy and I can’t make iron +do what we please, and you can, sir! It would be a grand thing for us +if we could!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, yes, a grand thing, no doubt!—Why?”</p> + +<p>“Because then we could get something to eat, and somewhere to lie +down.”</p> + +<p>“Could you? Look at me, now! I can do the work of two men, and can’t +get work for half a man!”</p> + +<p>“That’s a sad pity!” said Clare. “I wish I had work! Then I would +bring you something to eat.”</p> + +<p>The man did not tell them why he had not work enough—that his +drunkenness, and the bad ways to which it had brought him, with the +fact that he so often dawdled over the work that was given him, caused +people to avoid him.</p> + +<p>“Who said I hadn’t enough to eat? I ain’t come to that yet, young ’un! +What made you say that?”</p> + +<p>“Because when I had work, I had plenty to eat; and now that I have +nothing to do, I have nothing to eat. It’s well I haven’t work now, +though,” added Clare with a sigh, “for I’m too tired to do any. Please +may I sit on this heap of ashes?”</p> + +<p>“Sit where you like, so long ’s you keep out o’ my way. I ain’t got +nothing to give you but a bar of iron. I’ll toast one for you if you +would like a bite.”</p> + +<p>“No, thank you, sir,” answered Clare, with a smile. “I’m afraid it +wouldn’t be digestible. They say toasted cheese ain’t. I wish I had a +try though!”</p> + +<p>“You’re a comical shaver, you are!” said the blacksmith. “You’ll come +to the gallows yet, if you’re a good boy! Them Sunday-schools is doin’ +a heap for the gallows!—That ain’t your brother?”</p> + +<p>By this time Tommy had begun to feel at home with the blacksmith, from +whose face the cloud had lifted a little, so that he looked less +dangerous. He had edged nearer to the fire, and now stood in the light +of it.</p> + +<p>“No,” answered Clare, with an odd doubtfulness in his tone. “I ought +to say <i>yes</i>, perhaps, for all men are my brothers; but I mean I +haven’t any particular one of my very own.”</p> + +<p>“That ain’t no pity; he’d ha’ been no better than you. I’ve a brother +I would choke any minute I got a chance.”</p> + +<p>While they talked, the blacksmith had put his iron in the fire, and +again stood blowing the bellows, when his attention was caught by the +gestures of the little red-eyed imp, Tommy, who was making rapid signs +to him, touching his forehead with one finger, nodding mysteriously, +and pointing at Clare with the thumb of his other hand, held close to +his side. He sought to indicate thus that his companion was an +innocent, whom nobody must mind. In the blacksmith Tommy saw one of +his own sort, and the blacksmith saw neither in Tommy nor in Clare any +reason to doubt the hint given him. Not the less was he inclined to +draw out the idiot.</p> + +<p>“Why do you let him follow you about, if he ain’t your brother?” he +said. “He ain’t nice to look at!”</p> + +<p>“I want to make him nice,” answered Clare, “and then he’ll be nice to +look at. You mustn’t mind him, please, sir. He’s a very little boy, +and ain’t been well brought up. His granny ain’t a good woman—at +least not very, you know, Tommy!” he added apologetically.</p> + +<p>“She’s a damned old sinner!” said Tommy stoutly.</p> + +<p>The man laughed.</p> + +<p>“Ha, ha, my chicken! you know a thing or two!” he said, as he took his +iron from the fire, and laid it again on the anvil.</p> + +<p>But besides the brother he would so gladly strangle, there was an +idiot one whom he had loved a little and teazed so much, that, when he +died, his conscience was moved. He felt therefore a little tender +toward the idiot before him. He bethought himself also that his job +would soon be at a stage where the fewer the witnesses the better, for +he was executing a commission for certain burglars of his +acquaintance. He would do no more that night! He had money in his +pocket, and he wanted a drink!</p> + +<p>“Look here, cubs!” he said; “if you ain’t got nowhere to go to, I +don’t mind if you sleep here. There ain’t no bed but the bed of the +forge, nor no blankets but this leather apron: you may have them, for +you can’t do them no sort of harm. I don’t mind neither if you put a +shovelful of slack and a little water now and then on the fire; and if +you give it a blow or two with the bellows now and then, you won’t be +stone-dead afore the mornin’!—Don’t be too free with the coals, now, +and don’t set the shed on fire, and take the bread out of my poor +innocent mouth. Mind what I tell you, and be good boys.”</p> + +<p>“Thank you, sir,” said Clare. “I thought you would be kind to us! I’ve +one friend, a bull, that’s very good to me. So is Jonathan. He’s a +horse. The bull’s name is Nimrod. He wants to gore always, but he’s +never cross with me.”</p> + +<p>The blacksmith burst into a roar of laughter at the idiotic +speech. Then he covered the fire with coal, threw his apron over +Clare’s head, and departed, locking the door of the smithy behind him.</p> + +<p>The boys looked at each other. Neither spoke. Tommy turned to the +bellows, and began to blow.</p> + +<p>“Ain’t you warm yet?” said Clare, who had seen his mother careful over +the coals.</p> + +<p>“No, I ain’t. I want a blaze.”</p> + +<p>“Leave the fire alone. The coal is the smith’s, and he told us not to +waste it.”</p> + +<p>“He ain’t no count!” said Tommy, as heartless as any grown man or +woman set on pleasure.</p> + +<p>“He has given us a place to be warm and sleep in! It would be a shame +to do anything he didn’t like. Have you no conscience, Tommy?”</p> + +<p>“No,” said Tommy, who did not know conscience from copper. The germ of +it no doubt lay in the God-part of him, but it lay deep. Tommy—no +worse than many a boy born of better parents—was like a hill full of +precious stones, that grows nothing but a few little dry shrubs, and +shoots out cold sharp rocks every here and there.</p> + +<p>“If you have no conscience,” answered Clare, “one must serve for +both—as far as it will reach! Leave go of that bellows, or I’ll make +you.”</p> + +<p>Tommy let the lever go, turned his back, and wandered, in such dudgeon +as he was capable of, to the other side of the shed.</p> + +<p>“Hello!” he cried, “here’s a door!—and it ain’t locked, it’s only +bolted! Let’s go and see!”</p> + +<p>“You may if you like,” answered Clare, “but if you touch anything of +the blacksmith’s, I’ll be down on you.”</p> + +<p>“All right!” said Tommy, and went out to see if there was anything to +be picked up.</p> + +<p>Clare got on the stone hearth of the forge, and lay down in the hot +ashes, too far gone with hunger to care for the clothes that were +almost beyond caring for. He was soon fast asleep; and warmth and +sleep would do nearly as much for him as food.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XX">Chapter XX.<br><span class="smcap">Tommy reconnoitres.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Tommy, out in the moonlight, found himself in a waste yard, scattered +over with bits of iron, mostly old and rusty. It was not an +interesting place, for it was not likely to afford him anything to +eat. Yet, with the instinct of the human animal, he went shifting and +prying and nosing about everywhere. Presently he heard a curious +sound, which he recognized as made by a hen. More stealthily yet he +went creeping hither and thither, feeling here and feeling there, in +the hope of laying his hand on the fowl asleep. Urged by his natural +impulse to forage, he had forgotten Clare’s warning. His hand did find +her, and had it been his grandmother instead of Clare in the smithy, +he would at once have broken the bird’s neck before she could cry out; +but with the touch of her feathers came the thought of Clare, and by +this time he understood that what Clare said, Clare would do.</p> + +<p>He had some knowledge of fowls; he had heard too much talk about them +at his grandmother’s not to know something of their habits; and +finding she sat so still, he concluded that under her might be +eggs. To his delight it was so. The hen belonged to a house at some +distance, and had wandered from it, in obedience to the secretive +instinct of animal maternity, strong in some hens, to seek a hidden +shelter for her offspring. This she had found in the smith’s yard, +beneath the mould-board of a plough that had lain there for +years. Slipping his hand under her, Tommy found five eggs. In greedy +haste he took them, every one.</p> + +<p>I must do him the justice to say that his first impulse was to dart +with them to Clare. But before he had taken a step toward him, again +he remembered his threat. With the eggs inside him, he could run the +risk; he would not mind a few blows—not much; but if he took them to +Clare, the unbearable thing was, that he would assuredly give every +one of them back to the hen. He was an idiot, and Tommy was there to +look after him; but, in looking after Clare, was Tommy to neglect +himself? If Clare would not eat the eggs Tommy carried him, as most +certainly he would not, the best thing was for Tommy to eat them +himself! What a good thing that it was no use to steal for Clare! The +steal would be all for himself! Not a step from the spot did Tommy +move till he had sucked every one of the five eggs. But he made one +mistake: he threw away the shells.</p> + +<p>When he had sucked them, he found himself much lighter-hearted, but, +alas, nearly as hungry as before! The spirit of research began again +to move him: where were eggs, what might there not be beside?</p> + +<p>The moon was nearly at the full; the smith’s yard was radiantly +illuminated. But even the moon could lend little enchantment to a +scene where nothing was visible but rusty, broken, deserted, +despairful pieces of old iron. Tommy lifted his eyes and looked +further.</p> + +<p>The enclosure was of small extent, bounded on one side by the garden +wall of the house they had just passed, and at the bottom by a broken +fence, dividing it from a piece of waste land that probably belonged +to the house. As he roamed about, Tommy spied a great heap of old iron +piled up against the wall, and made for it, in the hope of enlarging +his horizon. He scrambled to the top, and looked over. His gaze fell +right into a big butt, full of dark water. Twice that evening he met +the same horror! There was a legendary report, though he had not heard +it, I fancy, that his mother drowned herself instead of him: she fell +in, and he was fished out. Whether this was the origin of his fear or +not, so far from getting down by means of the water-butt, Tommy dared +not cross at that point. With much trembling he got on the top of the +wall, turned his back on the butt, and ran along like a cat, in search +of a place where he could descend into the garden. He went right to +the end, round the corner, and half-way along the bottom before he +found one. There he came to a doorway that had been solidly walled up +on the outside, while the door was left in position on the +inside—ready for use when the court of chancery should have decided +to whom the house belonged. Its frame was flush with the wall, so that +its bolts and lock afforded Tommy foothold enough to descend, and +confidence of being able to get up again.</p> + +<p>He landed in a moonlit wilderness—such a wilderness as a deserted +garden speedily becomes, the wealth in the soil converting it the +sooner to a savage chaos. Full of the impulse of discovery, and the +hope of presenting himself with importance to Clare as the bringer of +good tidings, Tommy forced his way through or crept under the +overgrown bushes, until he reached a mossy rather than gravelly walk, +where it was more easy to advance. It led him to the house.</p> + +<p>Had he been a boy of any imagination, he would have shuddered at the +thought of attempting an entrance. All the windows had outside +shutters. Those of the ground floor were closed—except one that swung +to and fro, and must have swung in many a wind since the house was +abandoned. The moon shone with a dull whitish gleam on the dusty +windows of the first and second stories, and on the great dormers that +shot out from the slope of the roof, and cast strange shadows upon +it. The door to the garden had had a porch of trellis-work, over which +jasmine and other creeping plants were trained; but whether anything +of the porch was left, no one could have told in that thicket of +creepers, interlaced and matted by antagonist forces of wind and +growth so that not a hint of door was visible. Clearly there was +nobody within.</p> + +<p>Tommy sought the window with the open shutter. Through the dirty +glass, and the reflection of the moon, he could see nothing. He tried +the sash, but could not stir it. He went round the corner to one end +of the house, and saw another door. But an enemy stepped between: the +moon shone suddenly up from the ground. In a hollow of the pavement +had gathered a pool from the drip of the neglected gutters, and out of +its hidden depth the staring round looked at him. It was the third +time Tommy’s nerves had been shaken that night, and he could stand no +more. At the awful vision he turned and fled, fell, and rose and fled +again. It was not imagination in Tommy; it was an undefined, +inexplicable horror, that must have had a cause, but could have no +reason. Young as he was he had already more than once looked on the +face of death, and had felt no awe; he had listened to the gruesomest +of tales, told not altogether without art, and had never moved a hair. +Only one material and two spiritual things had power with him; the one +material thing was hunger, the two spiritual things were a feeble love +for Clare, and a strong horror of water of any seeming depth. Now a +new element was added to this terror by the meddling of the moon in +the fiendish mystery—the secret of which must, I think, have been the +bottomless depth she gave the water.</p> + +<p>He rushed down the garden. With frightful hindrance from the +overgrowth, he found the prisoned door by strange perversion become a +ladder, gained by it the top of the wall, and sped along as if pursued +by an incarnate dread. Horror of horrors! all at once the moon again +looked up at him from below: he was within a yard or two of the big +water-butt! Right up to it he must go, for, close to it, on the other +side of the wall, was the heap of iron by which alone he could get +down. He tightened every nerve for the effort. He assured himself that +the thing would be over in a moment; that the water was quiet, and +could not follow him; that presently he would find himself in the +smithy by the warm forge-fire. The scaring necessity was, that he must +stoop and kneel right over the water-butt, in order to send his legs in +advance down the wall to the top of the mound. It was a moment of +agony. That very moment, with an appalling unearthly cry, something +dark, something hideous, something of inconceivable ghastliness, as it +seemed to Tommy, sprang right out of the water into the air. He +tumbled from the wall among the iron, and there lay.</p> + +<p>The stolen eggs were avenged. The hen, feverish and unhappy from the +loss of her hope of progeny, had gone to the butt to sip a little +water. Tommy, appearing on the wall above her, startled her. She, +flying up with a screech, startled Tommy, and became her own unwitting +avenger.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXI">Chapter XXI.<br><span class="smcap">Tommy is Found and Found out.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>When Clare woke from his first sleep, which he did within an hour—for +he was too hungry to sleep straight on, and the door, imperfectly +closed by Tommy, had come open, and let in a cold wind with the +moonlight—he raised himself on his elbow, and peered from his stone +shelf into the dreary hut. He could not at once tell where he was, but +when he remembered, his first thought was Tommy. He looked about for +him. Tommy was nowhere. Then he saw the open door, and remembered he +had gone out. Surely it was time he had come back! Stiff and sore, he +turned on his longitudinal axis, crept down from the forge, and went +out shivering to look for his imp. The moon shone radiant on the rusty +iron, and the glamour of her light rendered not a few of its shapes +and fragments suggestive of cruel torture. Picking his way among +spikes and corners and edges, he walked about the hideous wilderness +searching for Tommy, afraid to call for fear of attracting attention. +The hen too was walking about, disconsolate, but she took no notice of +him, neither did the sight of her give him any hint or rouse in him +the least suspicion: how could he suspect one so innocent and troubled +for the avenging genius through whom Tommy’s white face lay upturned +to the white moon! Her egg-shells lay scattered, each a ghastly point +in the moonshine, each a silent witness to the deed that had been +done. Tommy scattered and forgot them; the moon gathered and noted +them. But they told Clare nothing, either of Tommy’s behaviour or of +Tommy himself.</p> + +<p>He came at last to the heap of metal, and there lay Tommy, caught in +its skeleton protrusions. A shiver went through him when he saw the +pallid face, and the dark streak of blood across it. He concluded that +in trying to get over the wall he had failed and fallen back. He +climbed and took him in his arms. Tommy was no weight for Clare, weak +with hunger as he was, to carry to the smithy. He laid him on the +hearth, near the fire, and began to blow it up. The roaring of the +wind in the fire did not wake him. Clare went on blowing. The heat +rose and rose, and brought the boy to himself at last, in no +comfortable condition. He opened his eyes, scrambled to his feet, and +stared wildly around him.</p> + +<p>“Where is it?” he cried.</p> + +<p>“Where’s what?” rejoined Clare, leaving the bellows, and taking a hold +of him lest he should fall off.</p> + +<p>“The head that flew out of the water-butt,” answered Tommy with a +shudder.</p> + +<p>“Have you lost your senses, Tommy?” remonstrated Clare. “I found you +lying on a heap of old iron against the wall, with the moon shining on +you.”</p> + +<p>“Yes, yes!—the moon! She jumped out of the water-butt, and got a hold +of me as I was getting down. I knew she would!”</p> + +<p>“I didn’t think you were such a fool, Tommy!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“Well, you hadn’t the pluck to go yourself! You stopt in!” cried +Tommy, putting his hand to his head, but more sorely hurt that an +idiot should call him a fool.</p> + +<p>“Come and let me see, Tommy,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>He wanted to find out if he was much hurt; but Tommy thought he wanted +to go to the water-butt, and screamed.</p> + +<p>“Hold your tongue, you little idiot!” cried Clare. “You’ll have all +the world coming after us! They’ll think I’m murdering you!”</p> + +<p>Tommy restrained himself, and gradually recovering, told Clare what he +had discovered, but not what he had found.</p> + +<p>“There’s something yellow on your jacket! What is it?” said Clare. “I +do believe—yes, it is!—you’ve been eating an egg! Now I remember! I +saw egg-shells, more than two or three, lying in the yard, and the +poor hen walking about looking for her eggs! You little rascal! You +pig of a boy! I won’t thrash you this time, because you’ve fetched +your own thrashing. But—!”</p> + +<p>He finished the sentence by shaking his fist in Tommy’s face, and +looking as black at him as he was able.</p> + +<p>“I do believe it was the hen herself that frighted you!” he added. +“She served you right, you thief!”</p> + +<p>“I didn’t know there was any harm,” said Tommy, pretending to sob.</p> + +<p>“Why didn’t you bring me my share, then?”</p> + +<p>“’Cos I knowed you’d ha’ made me give ’em back to the hen!”</p> + +<p>“And you didn’t know there was any harm, you lying little brute!”</p> + +<p>“No, I didn’t.”</p> + +<p>“Now, look here, Tommy! If you don’t mind what I tell you, you and I +part company. One of us two must be master, and I will, or you must +tramp. Do you hear me?”</p> + +<p>“I can’t do without wictuals!” whimpered Tommy. “I didn’t come wi’ +<i>you</i> a purpose to be starved to death!”</p> + +<p>“I dare say you didn’t; but when I starve, you must starve too; and +when I eat, you shall have the first mouthful. What did you come with +me for?”</p> + +<p>“’Acos you was the strongest,” answered Tommy, “an’ I reckoned you +would get things from coves we met!”</p> + +<p>“Well, I’m not going to get things from coves we meet, except they +give them to me. But have patience, Tommy, and I’ll get you all you +can eat. You must give me time, you know! I ain’t got work yet!—Come +here. Lie down close to me, and we’ll go to sleep.”</p> + +<p>The urchin obeyed, pillowed his head on Clare’s chest, and went fast +asleep.</p> + +<p>Clare slept too after a while, but the necessities of his relation to +Tommy were fast making a man of him.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXII">Chapter XXII.<br><span class="smcap">The Smith in a Rage.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>They had not slept long, when they were roused by a hideous clamour +and rattling at the door, and thunderous blows on the wooden sides of +the shed. Clare woke first, and rubbed his eyelids, whose hinges were +rusted with sleep. He was utterly perplexed with the uproar and +romage. The cabin seemed enveloped in a hurricane of kicks, and the +air was in a tumult of howling and brawling, of threats and curses, +whose inarticulateness made them sound bestial. There never came pause +long enough for Clare to answer that they were locked in, and that the +smith must have the key in his pocket. But when Tommy came to himself, +which he generally did the instant he woke, but not so quickly this +time because of his fall, he understood at once.</p> + +<p>“It’s the blacksmith! He’s roaring drunk!” he said. “Let’s be off, +Clare! The devil ’ill be to pay when he gets in! He’ll murder us in +our beds!”</p> + +<p>“We ought to let him into his own house if we can,” replied Clare, +rising and going to the door. It was well for him that he found no way +of opening it, for every instant there came a kick against it that +threatened to throw it from lock and hinges at once. He protested his +inability, but the madman thought he was refusing to admit him, and +went into a tenfold fury, calling the boys hideous names, and swearing +he would set the shed on fire if they did not open at once. The boys +shouted, but the man had no sense to listen with, and began such a +furious battery on the door, with his whole person for a ram, that +Tommy made for the rear, and Clare followed—prudent enough, however, +in all his haste, to close the back-door behind them.</p> + +<p>Tommy was in front, and led the way to the bottom of the yard, and +over the fence into the waste ground, hoping to find some point in +that quarter where he could mount the wall. He could not face the +water-butt—with the moon in it, staring out of the immensity of the +lower world. He ran and doubled and spied, but could find no +foothold. Least of all was ascent possible at the spot where the door +stood on the other side; the bricks were smoother than elsewhere. He +turned the corner and ran along a narrow lane, Clare still following, +for he thought Tommy knew what he was about; but Tommy could find no +encouragement to attempt scaling the wall. They might have fled into +the fields that lay around; but the burrowing instinct was strong, and +the deserted house drew them. Then Clare, finding Tommy at fault, +bethought him that the little rascal had got up by the heap on which +he discovered him, and must be afraid to go that way again. He faced +about and ran, in his turn become leader. Tommy wheeled also, and +followed, but with misgiving. When they reached the farther corner of +the bottom wall, they stopped and peeped round before they would turn +it: they might run against the blacksmith in chase of them! But the +sound of his continued hammering at the door came to them, and they +went on. They crossed the fence and ran again, ran faster, for now +every step brought them nearer to their danger: the heap of iron lay +between them and the smithy, and any moment the smith might burst into +the shed, rush through, and be out upon them.</p> + +<p>They reached the heap. Clare sprang up; and Tommy, urged on the one +side by the fear of the drunken smith, and drawn on the other by the +dread of being abandoned by Clare, climbed shuddering after him.</p> + +<p>“Mind the water-butt, Clare!” he gasped; “an’ gi’ me a hand up.”</p> + +<p>Clare had already turned on the top of the wall to help him.</p> + +<p>“Now let me go first!” said Tommy, the moment he had his foot on +it. “I know how to get down.”</p> + +<p>He scudded along the wall, glad to have Clare between him and the +butt. Clare followed swiftly. He was not so quick on the cat-promenade +as Tommy, but he had a good head, and was spurred by the apprehension +of being seen up there in the moonlight.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXIII">Chapter XXIII.<br><span class="smcap">Treasure Trove.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>In a few moments they were safe in the thicket at the foot of what had +been their enemy and was now their friend—the garden-wall. How many +things and persons there are whose other sides are altogether +friendly! These are their true selves, and we must be true to get at +them.</p> + +<p>Tommy again took the lead, though with a fresh sinking of the heart +because of that other place with the moon in it. Through the tangled +thicket they made or found their way—and there stood the house, with +the moon looking down on its roof, and the drunkard’s thunder +troubling her still pale light—her <i>moon-thinking</i>. But for the noise +and the haste, Clare would have been frightened at them. There seemed +some secret between the house and the moon which they were determined +no one else should share. They were of one mind to terrify man or boy +who should attempt to cross the threshold! There was no time, however, +to heed such fancies. “If we could only get in without spoiling +anything!” thought Clare. Once in, they would hurt nothing, take but +the shelter and rest lying there of no good to anybody, and leave them +there all the same when they had done with them!</p> + +<p>While they stood looking at the house, the thundering at the door of +the smithy ceased. Presently they heard voices in altercation. One +voice was that of the smith, quieter than when last they heard it, but +ill-tempered and growling as at first. The other seemed that of a +woman. She had been able so far to quiet him, probably, that he +remembered he had the key in his pocket; for they thought they heard +the door of the smithy open. Then all was silent, and the outcasts +pursued their quest of an entrance to the house.</p> + +<p>Clare went ferreting as Tommy had done. He also tried to get a peep +through the window with the swinging shutter, but had no better +success than Tommy. Then he started to go round the corner next the +blacksmith’s yard.</p> + +<p>“Look out!” cried Tommy in a loud whisper, when he saw where he was +going.</p> + +<p>“Why?” asked Clare.</p> + +<p>“Because there’s a horrible hole there, full of water,” answered +Tommy.</p> + +<p>“I’ll keep a look out,” returned Clare, and went.</p> + +<p>When he was about half-way along the end of the house, he heard a +noise he did not understand, and stopped to listen. Some one seemed +moving somewhere.</p> + +<p>Then came a kind of scrambling sound, and presently the noise of a +great watery splash. Clare shivered from head to foot.</p> + +<p>“Something has fallen into the hole Tommy mentioned!” he said to +himself, and ran on to see. A few steps brought him to what Tommy had +taken for a great hole. It was nothing but a pool of rain-water: the +splash could not have come from that!</p> + +<p>Then it occurred to him that the water-butt could not be far off. He +forced his way through shrubs of various kinds, and reaching the wall, +went back along it until he came to the butt. A ray of moonlight showed +him that the side of it was wet, as if the water had lately come over +the edge. He looked about for some means of getting a peep into the +huge thing. It stood on a brick stand, of which it left a narrow edge +clear, but on this edge the bulge of the butt would not permit him to +mount. With the help of a small tree, however, he got on the wall, +which was better.</p> + +<p>Spying into the butt, he could see nothing at first, for a chimney was +now between it and the moon. A moment more, however, and he descried +something white in the dull iron gleam of the water. It was under the +water, but floating near the surface. He lay down on the wall, plunged +his arm into the butt, laid hold of it, and drew it out. It was a +little heavy for the size, for what should it be but a tiny baby, in a +flannel night-gown, which, as he drew it out, sent back little noisy +streams into the butt! It lay perfectly still in his arms, he did not +know whether dead or alive, but he thought it could hardly be drowned +so soon after the splash. It had been drugged, and the antagonism of +the two means employed to kill it was probably the saving of its life.</p> + +<p>Clare stood in stony bewilderment. What was he to do? Certainly not to +go after the mother! The first thing was to get it down from the +wall. That he could easily have done on the other side, by the heap; +but that was the side whence it must have been thrown, and they would +be but in worse difficulty there! He must get the baby down inside the +wall! With at least one arm occupied, the tree-way was impracticable. +There was only one other way, and that full of danger! But where there +is only one way, that way must be taken, and Clare did not hesitate. +He started along the top of the wall, with the poor unconscious germ +of humanity in his arms. He had lifted it from its watery coffin, out +of the cold arms of death, up into the clear air of life! True, that +air was cold, and filled only with moonshine; but there was the house +whose seal might be broken! and the moon saw the sun making warm the +under world! Along the narrow way, through the still, keen glimmer, +unseen, probably, by any eye in the sleeping town, he bore his burden, +speeding as fast as he dared, for he must not set a foot down amiss!</p> + +<p>Had any one caught sight of him, what a commotion would not the tale +have roused—of the spectre of a boy with a baby in his arms, gliding +noiseless in the moon and the middle night, along the top of the high +brick wall of a deserted house, where no one had lived within the +memory of man!</p> + +<p>When he reached the door-ladder, he found descent difficult but +possible. It was more difficult to make his way through the tangled +bushes without scratching the baby, which, after all, might, alas, be +beyond hurt! He held it close to his bosom, life coaxing life to “stay +a little.”</p> + +<p>Thus laden, he appeared before Tommy, who had heard the splash, and +thought Clare had fallen into the deep hole, but had not had courage +to go and see, partly from the fear of verifying his fear, but more +from his horror of the watery abyss. He stood trembling where Clare +had left him.</p> + +<p>To save the baby was now Clare’s only thought. The baby was now the +one thing in the universe! If only the light that shone on it were +that of the hot sun instead of the cold moon, which looked far more +like killing than bringing to life! “And,” thought Clare with himself, +“there ain’t much more heat in my body than in that shivery moon!” But +the sun would wake and mount the sky, and send the moon down, and all +would be different! Only, if nothing could be done in the meantime, +where would baby be by then!</p> + +<p>“Here, Tommy,” he cried, “come and see what I found in the water-butt.”</p> + +<p>At the word, Tommy turned to flee; but confidence in Clare, and +curiosity to see what, in Clare’s arms, could hardly hurt him, +prevailed, and he drew near cautiously.</p> + +<p>“Lord, it’s a kid!” he cried.</p> + +<p>“It’s not a kid,” said Clare, who had no slang; “it’s a baby!”</p> + +<p>“Well! ain’t a baby a kid, just?”</p> + +<p>Tommy did not know that the word stood for anything else than a child, +which was indeed its meaning long before it was specially applied to +the young of the goat. A <i>kidnapper</i> or <i>kidnabber</i> is a stealer of +children. Mr. Skeat tells us that <i>kid</i> meant at first just a young +one.</p> + +<p>“You can’t tell me what to do with it, I’m afraid, Tommy!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>Already it was as if from all eternity he had loved this helpless +little waif of Time, with its small, thin, blue-gray, gin-drugged +face; this tiny life, so hopeless, so miserable, yet so uncomplaining: +the thing that was, was the thing for it to bear; it had come into the +world to bear it! Ready to die, even Death would not have it; it must +live where it was not wanted, where it was not welcome!</p> + +<p>“Yes, I can!” answered Tommy with evil promptitude. “Put it in again.”</p> + +<p>“But that would drown it, you know, Tommy!” answered Clare, treating +him like the child he was not. “We want it to live, Tommy!”</p> + +<p>His tenderness for the baby made him speak with foolish gentleness.</p> + +<p>“No, we don’t!” returned Tommy. “What business has <i>it</i> to live, when +we can’t get nothing to eat?”</p> + +<p>Clare held faster to the baby with one arm, and with the fist of the +other struck straight out at Tommy, hit him between the eyes, and +knocked him flat. It was a miserable thing to have to do, and it made +Clare miserable, for Tommy was not half his size, and was still +suffering from his fall on the iron. But then the dying baby was not +half Tommy’s size, and any milder argument would have been lost on +him: he was thus sent on the way to understand that the baby had +rights; and that if the baby could not enforce them, there was one in +the world that could and would. Never in his life did Clare show more +instinctive wisdom than in that knock-down blow to the hardly blamable +little devil!</p> + +<p>Tommy got up at once. He was not much hurt, for he had a hard head +though he was easily knocked over. From that moment he began to +respect Clare. He had loved him before in a way; he had patronized +him, and feared to offend him because he was stronger than he; but +until now he had had no respect for him, believing little Tommy a much +finer fellow than big Clare. There are thousands for whom a blow is a +better thing than expostulation, persuasion, or any sort of +kindness. They are such that nothing but a blow will set their door +ajar for love to get in. That is why hardships, troubles, +disappointments, and all kinds of pain and suffering, are sent to so +many of us. We are so full of ourselves, and feel so grand, that we +should never come to know what poor creatures we are, never begin to +do better, but for the knock-down blows that the loving God gives us. +We do not like them, but he does not spare us for that.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXIV">Chapter XXIV.<br><span class="smcap">Justifiable Burglary.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Tommy rose rubbing his forehead, and crying quietly. He did not dare +say a word. It was well for him he did not. Clare, perplexed and +anxious about the baby, was in no mood to accept annoyance from +Tommy. But the urchin remaining silent, the elder boy’s indignation +began immediately to settle down.</p> + +<p>The infant lay motionless, its little heart beating doubtfully, like +the ticking of a clock off the level, as if the last beat might be +indeed the last.</p> + +<p>“We <i>must</i> get into the house, Tommy!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“Yes, Clare,” answered Tommy, very meekly, and went off like a shot to +renew investigation at the other end of the house. He was back in a +moment, his face as radiant with success as such a face could be, with +such a craving little body under it.</p> + +<p>“Come, come,” he cried. “We can get in quite easy. I ha’ <i>been</i> in!”</p> + +<p>The keen-eyed monkey had found a cellar-window, sunk a little below +the level of the ground—a long, narrow, horizontal slip, with a +grating over its small area not fastened down. He had lifted it, and +pushed open the window, which went inward on rusty hinges—so rusty +that they would not quite close again. That he had been in was a +lie. <i>He</i> knew better than go first! He belonged to the school of +<i>No. 1!</i>—all mean beggars.</p> + +<p>Clare hastened after him.</p> + +<p>“Gi’ me the kid, an’ you get in; you can reach up for it better, +’cause ye’re taller,” said Tommy.</p> + +<p>“Is it much of a drop?” asked Clare.</p> + +<p>“Nothing much,” answered Tommy.</p> + +<p>Clare handed him the baby, instructing him how to hold it, and +threatening him if he hurt it; then laid himself on his front, shoved +his legs across the area through the window, and followed with his +body. Holding on to the edge of the window-sill, he let his feet as +far down as he could, then dropped, and fell on a heap of coals, +whence he tumbled to the floor of the cellar.</p> + +<p>“You should have told me of the coals!” he said, rising, and calling +up through the darkness.</p> + +<p>“I forgot,” answered Tommy.</p> + +<p>“Give me the baby,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>When Tommy took the baby, he renewed that moment, and began to cherish +the sense of an injury done him by the poor helpless thing. He did not +pinch it, only because he dared not, lest it should cry. When he heard +Clare fall on the coals, and then heard him call up from the depth of +the cellar, he was greatly tempted to turn with it to the other end of +the house, and throw it in the pool, then make for the wall and the +fields, leaving Clare to shift for himself. But he durst not go near +the pool, and Clare would be sure to get out again and be after him! +so he stood with the hated creature in his unprotective arms. When +Clare called for it, he got into the shallow area, and pushed the baby +through the window, grasping the extreme of its garment, and letting +it hang into the darkness of the cellar, head downward. I believe then +the baby was sick, for, a moment after, and before Clare could get a +hold of it, it began to cry. The sound thrilled him with delight.</p> + +<p>“Oh, the darling!—Can’t you let her down a bit farther, Tommy?” he +said, with suppressed eagerness.</p> + +<p>He had climbed on the heap of coals, and was stretching up his arms to +receive her. In the faint glimmer from the diffused light of the moon, +he could just distinguish the window, blocked up by Tommy; the baby he +could not see.</p> + +<p>“No, I can’t,” answered Tommy. “Catch! There!”</p> + +<p>So saying he yielded to his spite, and waiting no sign of preparedness +on the part of Clare, let go his hold, and dropped the little one. It +fell on Clare and knocked him over; but he clasped it to him as he +fell, and they hurtled to the bottom of the coals without much damage.</p> + +<p>“I have her!” he cried as he got up. “Now you come yourself, Tommy.”</p> + +<p>He had known no baby but his lost sister, and thought of all babies as +girls.</p> + +<p>“You’ll catch me, won’t you, Clare?” said Tommy.</p> + +<p>“The thing you’ve done once you can do again! I can’t set down the +baby to catch you!” replied the unsuspicious Clare, and turned to seek +an exit from the cellar. He had not had time yet to wonder how Tommy +had got out.</p> + +<p>Tommy came tumbling on the top of the coals: he dared not be left with +the water-butt and the pool and the moon.</p> + +<p>“Where are you, Clare?” he called.</p> + +<p>Clare answered him from the top of the stone stair that led to the +cellar, and Tommy was soon at his heels. Going along a dark passage, +where they had to feel their way, they arrived at the kitchen. The +loose outside shutter belonged to it, and as it was open, a little of +the moonlight came in. The place looked dreary enough and cold enough +with its damp brick-floor and its rusty range; but at least they were +out of the air, and out of sight of the moon! If only they had some of +that coal alight!</p> + +<p>“I don’t see as we’re much better off!” said Tommy. “I’m as cold as +pigs’ trotters!”</p> + +<p>“Then what must baby be like!” said Clare, whose heart was brimful of +anxiety for his charge. It seemed to him he had never known misery +till now. Life or death for the baby—and he could do nothing! He was +cold enough himself, what with hunger, and the night, and the wet and +deadly cold little body in his arms; but whatever discomfort he felt, +it seemed not himself but the baby that was feeling it; he imputed it +all to the baby, and pitied the baby for the cold he felt himself.</p> + +<p>“We needn’t stay here, though,” he said. “There must be better places +in the house! Let’s try and find a bedroom!”</p> + +<p>“Come along!” responded Tommy.</p> + +<p>They left the kitchen, and went into the next room. It seemed warmer, +because it had a wooden floor. There was hardly any light in it, but +it felt empty. They went up the stair. When they turned on the landing +half-way, they saw the moon shining in. They went into the first room +they came to. Such a bedroom!—larger and grander than any at the +parsonage!</p> + +<p>“Oh baby! baby!” cried Clare, “now you’ll live—won’t you?”</p> + +<p>He seemed to have his own Maly an infant again in his arms. The +thought that the place was not his, and that he might get into trouble +by being there, never came to him. Use was not theft! The room and its +contents were to him as the water and the fire which even pagans +counted every man bound to hand to his neighbour. There was the bed! +Through all the cold time it had been waiting for them! The +counterpane was very dusty; and oh, such moth-eaten blankets! But +there were sheets under them, and they were quite clean, though dingy +with age! The moths—that is, their legs and wings and dried-up +bodies—flew out in clouds when they moved the blankets. Not the less +had they discovered Paradise! For the moths, they must have found it +an island of plum-cake!</p> + +<p>I do not know the history of the house—how it came to be shut up with +so much in it. I only know it was itself shut up in chancery, and +chancery is full of moths and dust and worms. I believe nobody in the +town knew much about it—not even the thieves. It was of course said +to be haunted, which had doubtless done something for its +protection. No one knew how long it had stood thus deserted. Nobody +thought of entering it, or was aware that there was furniture in +it. It was supposed to be somebody’s property, and that it was +somebody’s business to look after it: whether it was looked after or +not, nobody inquired. Happily for Clare and the baby and Tommy, that +was nobody’s business.</p> + +<p>With deft hands—for how often had he not seen his baby-sister +undressed!—Clare hurried off the infant’s one garment, gently rubbed +her little body till it was quite dry, if not very clean, and laid her +tenderly in the heart of the blankets, among the remains and eggs and +grubs of the mothy creatures—they were not wild beasts, or even +stinging things—and covered her up, leaving a little opening for her +to breathe through. She had not cried since Clare took her; she was +too feeble to cry; but, alas, there was no question about feeding her, +for he had no food to give her, were she crying ever so much! He threw +off his clothes, and got into the mothy blankets beside her. In a few +minutes he began to glow, for there was a thick pile of woolly +salvation atop of him. He took the naked baby in his arms and held her +close to his body, and they grew warmer together.</p> + +<p>“Now, Tommy,” he said, “you may take off your clothes, and get in on +the other side of me.”</p> + +<p>Tommy did not need a second invitation, and in a moment they were all +fast asleep. A few months, even a few days before, it would have been +a right painful thing to Clare to lie so near a boy like Tommy, but +suffering had taken the edge off nicety and put it on humanity. The +temple of the Lord may need cleansing, but the temple of the Lord it +is. Clare had in him that same spirit which made <i>the</i> son of man go +beyond the healingly needful, and lay his hand—the Sinaitic +manuscript says his <i>hands</i>—upon the leper, where a word alone would +have served for the leprosy: the hands were for the man’s +heart. Repulsive danger lay in the contact, but the flesh and bones +were human, and very cold.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXV">Chapter XXV.<br><span class="smcap">A New Quest.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Though as comfortable as one could be who so sorely lacked food, Clare +slept lightly. His baby was heavy on his mind, and he woke very +early—woke at once to the anxious thought of a boy without food, +money, or friends, and with a hungry baby. He woke, however, with a +new train of reasoning in his mind. Babies could not work; babies +always had their food given them; therefore babies who hadn’t food had +a right to ask for it; babies couldn’t ask for it; therefore those who +had the charge of them, and hadn’t food to give them, had a right to +do the asking for them. He could not beg for himself as long as he was +able to ask for work; but for baby it was his duty to beg, because she +could not wait: she would not live till he found work. If he got work +that very day, he would have to work the whole day before he got the +money for it, and baby would be dead by that time! He crept out, so as +not to awake the sleepers, and put on his clothes. They were not dry, +but they would dry when the sun rose. He did not at all like leaving +his baby with Tommy, but what was he to do? She might as well die of +Tommy as of hunger! Perhaps it might be easier!</p> + +<p>He thought over the nature of the boy, and what it would be best to +say to him. He saw what many genial persons are slow to see, that +kindness, in its natural shape, is to certain dispositions a great +barrier in the way of learning either love or duty. With multitudes, +nothing but undiluted fear or pain or shame can open the door for love +to enter.</p> + +<p>He searched the house for a medicine-bottle, such as he had seen +plenty of at the parsonage, and found two. He chose the smaller, lest +size should provoke disinclination. Then he woke Tommy, and said to +him,</p> + +<p>“Tommy, I’m going out to get baby’s breakfast.”</p> + +<p>“Ain’t you going to give <i>me</i> any? Is the kid to have <i>everything</i>?”</p> + +<p>“Tommy!” said Clare, with a steady look in his eyes that frightened +him, “your turn will come next. You won’t die of want for a day or two +yet. I’ll see to you as soon as I can. Only, remember, baby comes +first! I’m going to leave her with you. You needn’t take her up. +You’re not able to carry her. You would let her fall. But if, when I +come home, I find anything has happened to her, _I’ll put you in the +water-butt_—I WILL. And I’ll do it when the moon is in it.”</p> + +<p>Tommy pulled a hideous face, and began to yell. Clare seized him by +the throat.</p> + +<p>“Make that noise again, you rascal, and I’ll choke you. If you’re good +to baby while I’m away, I won’t eat a mouthful till you’ve had some; +if you’re not good to her, you know what will happen! You’ve got the +thing in your own hands!”</p> + +<p>“She’ll go an’ do something I can’t help, an’ then you’ll go for to +drown me!”</p> + +<p>Again he began to howl, but Clare checked him as before. “If you wake +her up, I’ll—” He had no words, and shook him for lack of any. “I +see,” he resumed, “I shall have to lock you up in the coal-cellar till +I come back! Here! come along!”</p> + +<p>Tommy was quiet instantly, and fell to pleading. Clare lent a gracious +ear, and yielding to Tommy’s protestations, left him with his +treasure, and set out on his quest.</p> + +<p>He got out through the kitchen, the rustiness of the fastenings of its +door delaying him a little, and over the wall by the imprisoned door, +taking care to lift as little as possible of his person above the +coping as he crossed. He dared not go along the wall in the daylight, +or get down in the smith’s yard; he dropped straight to the ground.</p> + +<p>The country was level, and casting his eyes about, he saw, at no great +distance, what looked like a farmstead. He knew cows were milked +early, but did not know what time it was. Hoping anyhow to reach the +place before the milk was put away in the pans, he set out to run +straight across the fields. But he soon found he could not run, and +had to drop into a walk.</p> + +<p>When he got into the yard, he saw a young woman carrying a foaming +pail of milk across to the dairy. He ran to her, and addressed her +with his usual “Please, ma’am;” but the pail was heavy, and she kept +on without answering him. Clare followed her, and looking into the +dairy, saw an elderly woman.</p> + +<p>“Please, ma’am, could you afford me as much fresh milk as would fill +that bottle?” he said, showing it.</p> + +<p>“Well, my man,” she answered pleasantly, “I think we might venture as +far without fear of the workhouse! But what on earth made you bring +such a thimble of a bottle as that?”</p> + +<p>“I have no money to pay for it, you see, ma’am; and I thought a little +bottle would be better to beg with; it wouldn’t be so hard on the +farmer!”</p> + +<p>“Bless the boy! Much good a drop of milk like that will do him!” said +the woman, turning to the girl. “Is it for your mother’s tea?”</p> + +<p>“No, ma’am; it’s for a baby—a very little baby, ma’am!—I think it +will hold enough,” he added, giving an anxious glance at the bottle in +his hand, “to keep her alive till I get work.”</p> + +<p>The woman looked, and her heart was drawn to the boy who stood gazing +at her with his whole solemn, pathetic yet strong face—with his wide, +clear eyes, his decided nose, large and straight, his rather long, +fine mouth, trembling with eager anxiety, and his confident chin. She +saw hunger in his grimy cheeks; she saw that his manners were those of +a gentleman, and his clothes poor enough for any tramp, though +evidently not made for a tramp. She would have concluded him escaped +from cruel guardians, for she was a reader of <i>The Family Herald</i>; but +that would not account for the baby! The baby did not tally!</p> + +<p>“How old’s the baby?” she asked.</p> + +<p>“I don’t know, ma’am; she only came to us last night.”</p> + +<p>“Who brought her?”</p> + +<p>She imagined the boy a simpleton, and expected one of such answers as +inconvenient questions in natural history receive from nurses.</p> + +<p>“I don’t know, ma’am. I took her out of the water-butt.”</p> + +<p>The thing grew bewildering.</p> + +<p>“Who put her there?”</p> + +<p>“I don’t know, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>“Whose baby is she, then?”</p> + +<p>“Mine, I think, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>“God bless the boy!” said the woman impatiently, and stared at him +speechless.</p> + +<p>Her daughter in the meantime had filled the phial with new milk. She +handed it to him. He grasped it eagerly. Tears of joy came in his big +hungry eyes.</p> + +<p>“Oh, <i>thank</i> you, ma’am!” he said. “But, please, would you tell me,” +he continued, looking from the one to the other, “how much water I +must put in the milk to make it good for baby? I know it wants water, +but I don’t know how much!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, about half and half,” answered the elder woman. “Ain’t she got +no mother?” she resumed.</p> + +<p>“I think she must have a mother, but I daresay she’s a tramp,” +answered Clare.</p> + +<p>“I don’t want to give my good milk to a tramp!” she rejoined.</p> + +<p>“<i>I</i>’m not a tramp, please, ma’am!—at least I wasn’t till the day +before yesterday.”</p> + +<p>The woman looked at him out of motherly eyes, and her heart swelled +into her bosom.</p> + +<p>“Wouldn’t you like some milk yourself?” she said.</p> + +<p>“Oh, yes, ma’am!” answered Clare, with a deep sigh.</p> + +<p>She filled a big cup from the warm milk in the pail, and held it out +to him. He took it as a man on the scaffold might a reprieve from +death, half lifted it to his lips, then let his hand sink. It trembled +so, as he set the cup down on a shelf beside him, that he spilled a +little. He looked ruefully at the drops on the brick floor.</p> + +<p>“Please, ma’am, there’s Tommy!” he faltered.</p> + +<p>His promise to Tommy had sprung upon him like a fiery flying serpent.</p> + +<p>“Tommy! I thought you said the baby was a girl?”</p> + +<p>“Yes, the baby’s a girl; but there’s Tommy as well! He’s another of +us.”</p> + +<p>“Your brother, of course!”</p> + +<p>“No, ma’am; I’m afraid he’s a tramp. But there he is, you see, and I +must share with him!”</p> + +<p>It grew more and more inexplicable!</p> + +<p>A gruff, loud voice came from the yard. It was the farmer’s. He was a +bitter-tempered man, and his dislike of tramps was almost hatred. His +wife and daughter knew that if he saw the boy he would be worse than +rude to him.</p> + +<p>“There’s the master!” cried the mother. “Drink, and make haste out of +his way.”</p> + +<p>“If it’s stealing,—” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“Stealing! It’s no stealing! The dairy’s mine! I can give my milk +where I please!”</p> + +<p>“Well, ma’am, if the milk’s mine because you gave it me, it’s not +begging to ask you to give me a piece of bread for it! I could take a +share of that to Tommy!”</p> + +<p>“Run, Chris,” cried the mother, hurriedly; “take the innocent with +you—round outside the yard. Give him a hunch of bread, and let him +go. For God’s sake don’t let your father see him! Run, my boy, run! +There’s no time to drink the milk now!”</p> + +<p>She poured it back into the pail, and set the cup out of the way.</p> + +<p>There was a little passage and another door, by which they left as the +farmer entered. The kick he would have given Clare with his heavy boot +would, in its consequences, have reached the baby too. The girl ran +with him to the back of the house.</p> + +<p>“Wait a moment at that window,” she said.</p> + +<p>Now whether it was loving-kindness all, or that she dared not take the +time to divide it, I cannot tell, but she handed Clare a whole loaf, +and that a good big one, of home-made bread, and disappeared before he +could thank her, telling him to run for his life.</p> + +<p>He was able now. With the farmer behind, and the hungry ones before +him, he <i>must</i> run; and with the phial in his pocket and the loaf in +his hands, he <i>could</i> run. Happily the farmer did not catch sight of +him. His wife took care he should not. I believe, indeed, she got up a +brand-new quarrel with him on the spur of the moment, that he might +not have a chance.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXVI">Chapter XXVI.<br><span class="smcap">A New Entrance.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Clare sped jubilant. But soon came a check to his jubilation: it was +one thing to drop from the wall, and quite another to climb to the top +of it without the help of the door! The same moment he heard the clink +of the smith’s hammer on his anvil, and to go by his yard in daylight +would be to risk too much! For what would become of them if their +retreat was discovered! He stood at the foot of the brick precipice, +and stared up with helpless eyes and failing strength. Baby was +inside, hungry, and with no better nurse than ill conditioned Tommy; +her milk was in his pocket, Tommy’s bread in his hand, the +insurmountable wall between him and them! He had the daylight now, +however, and there was hardly any one about: perhaps he could find +another entrance! Round the outside of the wall, therefore, like the +Midianite in the rather comical hymn, did Clare prowl and prowl. But +the wall rose straight and much too smooth wherever he looked. +Searching its face he went all along the bottom of the garden, and +then up the narrow lane between it and the garden of the next house, +with increasing fear that there was no way but by the smith’s yard, +and no choice but risk it.</p> + +<p>A dozen yards or so, however, from the end of the lane, where it took +a sharp turn before entering the street, he spied an opening in the +wall—the same from which, the night before, Tommy had returned with +such a frightened face. Clare went through, and found a narrow passage +running to the left for a short distance between two walls. At the +end, half on one side, half on the other of the second wall, lay the +well that had terrified Tommy. The wall crossed it with a low arch. On +the further side of the well was a third wall, with a space of about +two feet and a half between it and the side of the round well. Through +that wall there might be a door!—or, if not, there might be some way +of getting over it! To cross the well would be awkward, but he must do +it! He tied the loaf in his pocket-handkerchief—he was far past +fastidiousness, and Tommy knew neither the word nor the thing—and +knotted the ends of it round his neck. But his chief anxiety was not +to break the bottle in his jacket-pocket. He got on his knees on the +parapet. How deep and dark the water looked! For a moment he felt a +fear of it something like Tommy’s. How was he to cross the awful gulf? +It was not like a free jump; he was hemmed in before and behind, and +overhead also. But the baby drew him over the well, as the name of +Beatrice drew Dante through the fire. The baby was waiting for him, +and it had to be done! He made a cat-leap through beneath the arch, +reaching out with his hands and catching at the parapet beyond. He did +catch it, just enough of it to hold on by, so that his body did not +follow his legs into the water. Oh, how cold they found it after his +run! He held on, strained and heaved up, made a great reach across the +width of the parapet with one hand, laid hold of its outer edge, made +good his grasp on it, and drew himself out of the water, and out of +the well.</p> + +<p>He was in a narrow space, closed in with walls much higher than his +head, out of which he saw no way but that by which he had come +in—across the fearful well, that seemed, so dark was its water, to go +down and down for ever.</p> + +<p>He felt in his pocket. If then he had found baby’s bottle broken, I +doubt if Clare would ever have got out of the place, except by the +door into the next world. What little strength he had was nearly gone, +and I think it would then have gone quite. But the bottle was safe and +his courage came back.</p> + +<p>He examined his position, and presently saw that the narrowness of his +threatened prison would make it no prison at all. He found that, by +leaning his back against one wall, pushing his feet against the +opposite wall, and making of the third wall a rack for his shoulder, +he could worm himself slowly up. It was a task for a strong man, and +Clare, though strong for his years, was not at that moment strong. But +there was the baby waiting, and here was her milk! He fell to, and, +with an agony of exertion, wriggled himself at last to the top—so +exhausted that he all but fell over on the other side. He pulled +himself together, and dropped at once into the garden. Happier boy +than Clare was not in all England then. Hunger, wet, incipient +nakedness, for he had torn his clothes badly, were nowhere. Baby was +within his reach, and the milk within baby’s!</p> + +<p>He ran, dripping like a spaniel, to find her, and shot up the stair to +the room that held his treasure. To his joy he found both Tommy and +the baby fast asleep, Tommy tired out with the weary tramping of the +day before, and the baby still under the influence of the opiate her +mother had given her to make her drown quietly.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXVII">Chapter XXVII.<br><span class="smcap">The Baby has her Breakfast.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>He waked Tommy, and showed him the loaf. Tommy sprang from his lair +and snatched at it.</p> + +<p>“No, Tommy,” said Clare, drawing back, “I can’t trust you! You would +eat it all; and if I died of hunger, what would become of baby, left +alone with you? I don’t feel at all sure you wouldn’t eat <i>her</i>!”</p> + +<p>Baby started a feeble whimper.</p> + +<p>“You must wait now till I’ve attended to her,” continued Clare. “If +you had got up quietly without waking her, I would have given you your +share at once.”</p> + +<p>As he spoke, he pulled a blanket off the bed to wrap her in, and made +haste to take her up. A series of difficulties followed, which I will +leave to the imagination of mothers and aunts, and nurses in +general—the worst being that there was no warm water to wash her in, +and cold water would be worse than dangerous after what she had gone +through with it the night before. Clare comforted himself that washing +was a thing non-essential to existence, however desirable for +well-being.</p> + +<p>Then came a more serious difficulty: the milk must be mixed with +water, and water as cold as Clare’s legs would kill the drug-dazed +shred of humanity! What was to be done? It would be equally dangerous +to give her the strong milk of a cow undiluted. There was but one way: +he must feed her as do the pigeons. First, however, he must have +water! The well was almost inaccessible: to get to it and return would +fearfully waste life-precious time! The rain-water in the little pool +must serve the necessity! It was preferable to that in the butt!</p> + +<p>Until many years after, it did not occur to Clare as strange that +there should be even a drop of water in that water-butt. Whence was it +fed? There was no roof near, from which the rain might run into it. If +there had ever been a pipe to supply it, surely, in a house so long +forsaken, its continuity must have given way. One always sees such +barrels empty, dry, and cracked: this one was apparently known to be +full of water, for what woman in her senses, however inferior those +senses, would throw her child into an empty butt! How did it happen to +be full? Clare was almost driven to the conclusion that it had been +filled for the evil purpose to which it was that night put. Against +this was the fact that it would not have been easy to fill such a huge +vessel by hand. I suggested that the blacksmith and his predecessors +might have used it for the purposes of the forge, and kept it and its +feeder in repair. Mr. Skymer endeavoured repeatedly to find out what +had become of the blacksmith, but never with any approach to success; +the probability being that he had left the world long before his +natural time, by disease engendered or quarrel occasioned through his +drunkenness.</p> + +<p>Clare laid the baby down, and fetched water from the pool. Then he +mixed the milk with what seemed the right quantity, again took the +baby up, who had been whimpering a little now and then all the time, +laid a blanket, several times folded, on his wet knees, and laid her +in her blanket upon it. These preparations made, he took a small +mouthful of the milk and water, and held it until it grew warm. It was +the only way, I condescend to remind any such reader as may think it +proper to be disgusted. When then he put his mouth to the baby’s, +careful not to let too much go at once, they managed so between them +that she successfully appropriated the mouthful. It was followed by a +second, a third, and more, until, to Clare’s delight, the child seemed +satisfied, leaving some of the precious fluid for another meal. He put +her in the bed again, and covered her up warm. All the time, Tommy had +been watching the loaf with the eyes of a wild beast.</p> + +<p>“Now, Tommy,” said Clare, “how much of this loaf do you think you +ought to have?”</p> + +<p>“Half, of course!” answered Tommy boldly, with perfect conviction of +his fairness, and pride in the same.</p> + +<p>“Are you as big as I am?”</p> + +<p>Tommy held his peace.</p> + +<p>“You ain’t half as big!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“I’m a bloomin’ lot hungrier!” growled Tommy.</p> + +<p>“You had eggs last night, and I had none!”</p> + +<p>“That wurn’t my fault!”</p> + +<p>“What did you do to get this bread?”</p> + +<p>“I staid at home with baby.”</p> + +<p>“That’s true,” answered Clare. “But,” he went on, “suppose a horse and +a pony had got to divide their food between them, would the pony have +a right to half? Wouldn’t the horse, being bigger, want more to keep +him alive than the pony?”</p> + +<p>“Don’t know,” said Tommy.</p> + +<p>“But you shall have the half,” continued Clare; “only I hope, after +this, when you get anything given to you, you’ll divide it with me. I +try to be fair, and I want you to be fair.”</p> + +<p>Tommy made no reply. He did not trouble himself about fair play; he +wanted all he could get—like most people; though, thank God, I know a +few far more anxious to give than to receive fair play. Such men, be +they noblemen or tradesmen, I worship.</p> + +<p>Clare carefully divided the loaf, and after due deliberation, handed +Tommy that which seemed the bigger half. Without a word of +acknowledgment, Tommy fell upon it like a terrier. He would love Clare +in a little while when he had something more to give—but stomach +before heart with Tommy! His sort is well represented in every +rank. There are not many who can at the same time both love and be +hungry.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXVIII">Chapter XXVIII.<br><span class="smcap">Treachery.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>“Now, Tommy,” said Clare, having eaten his half loaf, “I’m going out +to look for work, and you must take care of baby. You’re not to feed +her—you would only choke her, and waste the good milk.”</p> + +<p>“I want to go out too,” said Tommy.</p> + +<p>“To see what you can pick up, I suppose?”</p> + +<p>“That’s my business.”</p> + +<p>“I fancy it mine while you are with me. If you don’t take care of baby +and be good to her, I’ll put you in the water-butt I took her out +of—as sure as you ain’t in it now!”</p> + +<p>“That you shan’t!” cried Tommy; “I’ll bite first!”</p> + +<p>“I’ll tie your hands and feet, and put a stick in your mouth,” said +Clare. “So you’d better mind.”</p> + +<p>“I want to go with you!” whimpered Tommy.</p> + +<p>“You can’t. You’re to stop and look after baby. I won’t be away longer +than I can help; you may be sure of that.”</p> + +<p>With repeated injunctions to him not to leave the room, Clare went.</p> + +<p>Before going quite, however, he must arrange for returning. To swarm +up between the two walls as he had done before, would be to bid +good-bye to his jacket at least, and he knew how appearances were +already against him. Spying about for whatever might serve his +purpose, he caught sight of an old garden-roller, and was making for +it, when Tommy, never doubting he was gone, came whistling round the +corner of the house with his hands in his pocket-holes, and an +impudent air of independence. Clare away, he was a lord in his own +eyes! He could kill the baby when he pleased! Plainly his mood was, +“He thinks I’m going to do as he tells me! Not if I knows it!” Clare +saw him before he saw Clare, and rushed at him with a roar.</p> + +<p>“You thought I was gone!” he cried. “I told you not to leave the room! +Come along to the water-butt!”</p> + +<p>Tommy shivered when he heard him, and gave a shriek when he saw him +coming. He shook till his teeth chattered. But terror not always +paralyzes instinct in the wild animal. As Clare came running, he took +one step toward him, and dropped on the ground at his feet. Clare shot +away over his head, struck his own against a tree, and lay for a +minute stunned. Tommy’s success was greater than he had hoped. He +scudded into the house, and closed and bolted the door to the kitchen.</p> + +<p>When Clare came to himself, he found he had a cut on his head. It +would never do to go asking for work with a bloody face! The little +pool served at once for basin and mirror, and while he washed he +thought.</p> + +<p>He had no inclination to punish Tommy for the trick he had played him; +he had but done after his kind! It would serve a good end too: Tommy +would imagine him lurking about to have his revenge, and would not +venture his nose out. He discovered afterward that the little wretch +had made fast the cellar-door, so that, if he had entered that way, he +would have been caught in a trap, and unable to go or return.</p> + +<p>He got the iron roller to the foot of the wall, where he had come over +the night before, and where now first he perceived there had once been +a door; managed, with its broken handle for a lever, to set it up on +end, filled it with earth, and heaped a mound of earth about it to +steady it, placed a few broken tiles and sherds of chimney-pots upon +it, and from this rickety perch found he could reach the top easily.</p> + +<p>The next thing was to arrange for getting up from the other side. For +this he threw over earth and stones and whatever rubbish came to his +hand, the sole quality required in his material being, that it should +serve to lift him any fraction of an inch higher. The space was so +narrow that his mound did not require to be sustained by the width of +its base except in one direction; everywhere else the walls kept in +the heap, and he made good speed. At length he descended by it, sure +of being able to get up again.</p> + +<p>He had been gone an hour before Tommy dared again leave the room where +the baby was. He had planned what to do if Clare got into it: he would +threaten, if he came a step nearer, to kill the baby! But if he had +him in the coal-cellar, he would make his own conditions! A tramp +would not keep a promise, but Clare would! and until he promised not +to touch him, he should not come out—not if he died of hunger!</p> + +<p>At length he could bear imprisonment no longer. He opened the +room-door with the caution of one who thought a tiger might be lying +against it. He saw no one, and crept out with half steps. By slow +degrees, interrupted by many an inroad of terror and many a swift +retreat, he got down the stair and out into the garden; whence, after +closest search, he was at length satisfied his enemy had departed. For +a time he was his own master! To one like Tommy—and such are not +rare—it is a fine thing to be his own master. But the same person who +is the master is the servant—and what a master to serve! Tommy, +however, was quite satisfied with both master and servant, for both +were himself. What was he to do? Go after something to eat, of course! +He would be back long before Clare! He had gone to look for work—and +who would give <i>him</i> work? If Tommy were as big as Clare, lots of +people would give him work! But catch him working! Not if he knew +it!—not Tommy!</p> + +<p>Never till she was grown up, never, indeed, until she was a +middle-aged woman and Mr. Skymer’s housekeeper, did the baby know in +what danger she was that morning, alone with surnameless Tommy.</p> + +<p>His first sense of relation to any creature too weak to protect +itself, was the consciousness of power to torment that creature. But +in this case the exercise of the power brought him into another +relation, one with the water-butt! He went back to the room where the +child lay in her blankets like a human chrysalis, and stood for a +moment regarding her with a hatred far from mild: was he actually +expected to give time and personal notice to that contemptible thing +lying there unable to move? <i>He</i> wasn’t a girl or an old woman! He +must go and get something to eat! that was what a man was for! Better +twist her neck at once and go!</p> + +<p>But he could not forget the water-butt—proximate mother of the +child. Its idea came sliding into Tommy’s range, grew and grew upon +Tommy, came nearer and nearer, until the baby was nowhere, and nothing +in the world but the water-butt. His consciousness was possessed with +it. It was preparing to swallow him in its loathsome deep! All at once +it jumped back from him, and stood motionless by the side of the +wall. Now was his chance! Now he must mizzle! Not a moment longer +would he stop in the same place with the horrible thing!</p> + +<p>But the baby! Clare would bring him back and put him in the butt! No, +he wouldn’t! What harm would come to the brat? She was not able to +roll herself off the bed! She could do nothing but go to sleep again! +Out he must and would go! He wanted something to eat! He would be in +again long before Clare could get back!</p> + +<p>He left the room and the house, ran down the garden, scrambled up the +door, got on the top of the wall, and dropped into the waste land +behind it—nor once thought that the only way back was by the very +jaws of the water-butt.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXIX">Chapter XXIX.<br><span class="smcap">The Baker.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Clare went over the wall and the well without a notion of what he was +going to do, except look for work. He had eaten half a loaf, and now +drew in his cap some water from the well and drank. He felt better +than any moment since leaving the farm. He was full of hope.</p> + +<p>All his life he had never been other than hopeful. To the human being +hope is as natural as hunger; yet how few there are that hope as they +hunger! Men are so proud of being small, that one wonders to what +pitch their conceit will have arrived by the time they are nothing at +all. They are proud that they love but a little, believe less, and +hope for nothing. Every fool prides himself on not being such a fool +as believe what would make a man of him. For dread of being taken in, +he takes himself in ridiculously. The man who keeps on trying to do +his duty, finds a brighter and brighter gleam issue, as he walks, from +the lantern of his hope.</p> + +<p>Clare was just breaking into a song he had heard his mother sing to +his sister, when he was checked by the sight of a long skinny mongrel +like a hairy worm, that lay cowering and shivering beside a heap of +ashes put down for the dust-cart—such a dry hopeless heap that the +famished little dog did not care to search it: some little warmth in +it, I presume, had kept him near it. Clare’s own indigence made him +the more sorry for the indigent, and he felt very sorry for this +member of the family; but he had neither work nor alms to give him, +therefore strode on. The dog looked wistfully after him, as if +recognizing one of his own sort, one that would help him if he could, +but did not follow him.</p> + +<p>A hundred yards further, Clare came to a baker’s shop. It was the +first he felt inclined to enter, and he went in. He did not know it +was the shop from whose cart Tommy had pilfered. A thin-faced, +bilious-looking, elderly man stood behind the counter.</p> + +<p>“Well, boy, what do you want?” he said in a low, sad, severe, but not +unkindly voice.</p> + +<p>“Please, sir,” answered Clare, “I want something to do, and I thought +perhaps you could help me.”</p> + +<p>“What can you do?”</p> + +<p>“Not much, but I can <i>try</i> to do anything.”</p> + +<p>“Have you ever learned to do anything?”</p> + +<p>“I’ve been working on a farm for the last six months. Before that I +went to school.”</p> + +<p>“Why didn’t you go on going to school?”</p> + +<p>“Because my father and mother died.”</p> + +<p>“What was your father?”</p> + +<p>“A parson.”</p> + +<p>“Why did you leave the farm?”</p> + +<p>“Because they didn’t want me. The mistress didn’t like me.”</p> + +<p>“I dare say she had her reasons!”</p> + +<p>“I don’t know, sir; she didn’t seem to like anything I did. My mother +used to say, ‘Well done, Clare!’ My mistress never said ‘Well done!’”</p> + +<p>“So the farmer sent you away?”</p> + +<p>“No, sir; but he boxed my ears for something—I don’t now remember +what.”</p> + +<p>“I dare say you deserved it!”</p> + +<p>“Perhaps I did; I don’t know; he never did it before.”</p> + +<p>“If you deserved it, you had no right to run away for that.”</p> + +<p>The baker taught in a Sunday-school, and was a good teacher, able to +make a class mind him.</p> + +<p>“I didn’t run away for that, sir; I ran away because he was tired of +me. I couldn’t stay to make him uncomfortable! He had been very kind +to me; I fancy it was mistress made him change. I’ve been thinking a +good deal about it, and that’s how it looks to me. I’m very sorry not +to have him or the creatures any more.”</p> + +<p>“What creatures?”</p> + +<p>“The bull, and the horses, and the cows, and the pigs—all the +creatures about the farm. They were my friends. I shall see them all +again somewhere!”</p> + +<p>He gave a great sigh.</p> + +<p>“What do you mean by that?” asked the baker.</p> + +<p>“I hardly know what I mean,” answered Clare. “When I’m loving anybody, +I always feel I shall see that person again some time, I don’t know +when—somewhere, I don’t know where.”</p> + +<p>“That don’t apply to the lower animals; it’s nothing but a foolish +imagination,” said the baker.</p> + +<p>“But if I love them!” suggested Clare.</p> + +<p>“Love a bull, or a horse, or a pig! You can’t!” asserted the baker.</p> + +<p>“But I <i>do</i>,” rejoined Clare. “I love my father and mother much more +than when they were alive!”</p> + +<p>“What has that to do with it?” returned the baker.</p> + +<p>“That I know I love my father and mother, and I know I love that +fierce bull that would always do what I told him, and that dear old +horse that was almost past work, and was always ready to do his +best.—I’m afraid they’ve killed him by now!” he added, with another +sigh.</p> + +<p>“But beasts ain’t got souls, and you can’t love them. And if you +could, that’s no reason why you should see them again.”</p> + +<p>“I <i>do</i> love them, and perhaps they have souls!” rejoined Clare.</p> + +<p>“You mustn’t believe that! It’s quite shocking. It’s nowhere in the +Bible.”</p> + +<p>“Is everything that is not in the Bible shocking, sir?”</p> + +<p>“Well, I won’t say that; but you’re not to believe it.”</p> + +<p>“I suppose you don’t like animals, sir! Are you afraid of their going +to the same place as you when they die?”</p> + +<p>“I wouldn’t have a boy about me that held such an unscriptural notion! +The Bible says—the spirit of a man that goeth upward, and the spirit +of a beast that goeth downward!”</p> + +<p>“Is that in the Bible, sir?”</p> + +<p>“It is,” answered the baker with satisfaction, thinking he had proved +his point.</p> + +<p>“I’m so glad!” returned Clare. “I didn’t know there was anything about +it in the Bible! Then when I die I shall only have to go down +somewhere, and look for them till I find them!”</p> + +<p>The baker was silenced for a moment.</p> + +<p>“It’s flat atheism!” he cried. “Get out of my shop! What is the world +coming to!”</p> + +<p>Clare turned and went out.</p> + +<p>But though a bilious, the baker was not an unreasonable or unjust man +except when what he had been used to believe all his life was +contradicted. Clare had not yet shut the door when he repented. He was +a good man, though not quite in the secret of the universe. He vaulted +over the counter, and opened the door with such a ringing of its +appended bell as made heavy-hearted Clare turn before he heard his +voice. The long spare white figure appeared on the threshold, framed +in the doorway.</p> + +<p>“Hi!” it shouted.</p> + +<p>Clare went meekly back.</p> + +<p>“I’ve just remembered hearing—but mind I <i>know</i> nothing, and pledge +myself to nothing——”</p> + +<p>He paused.</p> + +<p>“I didn’t say I was <i>sure</i> about it,” returned Clare, thinking he +referred to the fate of the animals, “but I fear I’m to blame for not +being sure.”</p> + +<p>“Come, come!” said the baker, with a twist of his mouth that expressed +disgust, “hold your tongue, and listen to me.—I did hear, as I was +saying, that Mr. Maidstone, down the town, had one of his errand-boys +laid up with scarlet fever. I’ll take you to him, if you like. Perhaps +he’ll have you,—though I can’t say you look respectable!”</p> + +<p>“I ain’t had much chance since I left home, sir. I had a bit of soap, +but——”</p> + +<p>He bethought him that he had better say nothing about his +family. Tommy had picked his pocket of the soap the night before, and +tried to eat it, and Clare had hidden it away: he wanted it to wash +the baby with as soon as he could get some warm water; but when he +went to find it to wash his own face, it was gone. He suspected Tommy, +but before long he had terrible ground for a different surmise.</p> + +<p>“You see, sir,” he resumed, “I had other things to think of. When your +tummy’s empty, you don’t think about the rest of you—do you, sir?”</p> + +<p>The baker could not remember having ever been more than decently, +healthily hungry in his life; and here he had been rough on a +well-bred boy too hungry to wash his face! Perhaps the word _one of +these little ones_ came to him. He had some regard for him who spoke +it, though he did talk more about him on Sundays than obey him in the +days between.</p> + +<p>“I don’t know, my boy,” he answered. “Would you like a piece of +bread?”</p> + +<p>“I’m not much in want of it at this moment,” replied Clare, “but I +should be greatly obliged if you would let me call for it by and +by. You see, sir, when a man has no work, he can’t help having no +money!”</p> + +<p>“A man!” thought the baker. “God pity you, poor monkey!”</p> + +<p>He called to some one to mind the shop, removed his apron and put on a +coat, shut the door, and went down the street with Clare.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXX">Chapter XXX.<br><span class="smcap">The Draper.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>At the shop of a draper and haberdasher, where one might buy almost +anything sold, Clare’s new friend stopped and walked in. He asked to +see Mr. Maidstone, and a shopman went to fetch him from behind. He +came out into the public floor.</p> + +<p>“I heard you were in want of a boy, sir,” said the baker, who carried +himself as in the presence of a superior; and certainly fine clothes +and a gold chain and ring did what they could to make the draper +superior to the baker.</p> + +<p>“Hm!” said Mr. Maidstone, looking with contempt at Clare.</p> + +<p>“I rather liked the look of this poor boy, and ventured to bring him +on approval,” continued the baker timidly. “He ain’t much to look at, +I confess!”</p> + +<p>“Hm!” said the draper again. “He don’t look promising!”</p> + +<p>“He don’t. But I think he means performing,” said the baker, with a +wan smile.</p> + +<p>“Donnow, I’m sure! If he ’appened to wash his face, I could tell +better!”</p> + +<p>Clare thought he had washed it pretty well that morning because of his +cut, though he had, to be sure, done it without soap, and had been at +rather dirty work since!</p> + +<p>“He says he’s been too hungry to wash his face,” answered the baker.</p> + +<p>“Didn’t ’ave his ’ot water in time, I suppose!—Will you answer for +him, Mr. Ball?”</p> + +<p>“I can’t, Mr. Maidstone—not one way or another. I simply was taken +with him. I know nothing about him.”</p> + +<p>Here one of the shopmen came up to his master, and said,</p> + +<p>“I heard Mr. Ball’s own man yesterday accuse this very boy of taking a +loaf from his cart.”</p> + +<p>“Yesterday!” thought Clare; “it seems a week ago!”</p> + +<p>“Oh! this is the boy, is it?” said the baker. “You see I didn’t know +him! All the same, I don’t believe he took the loaf.”</p> + +<p>“Indeed I didn’t, sir! Another boy took it who didn’t know better, and +I took it from him, and was putting it back on the cart when the man +turned round and saw me, and wouldn’t listen to a word I said. But a +working-man believed me, and bought the loaf, and gave it between us.”</p> + +<p>“A likely story!” said the draper.</p> + +<p>“I’ve heard that much,” said the baker, “and I believe it. At least I +have no reason to believe my man against him, Mr. Maidstone. That same +night I discovered he had been cheating me to a merry tune. I +discharged him this morning.”</p> + +<p>“Well, he certainly don’t look a respectable boy,” said the draper, +who naturally, being all surface himself, could read no deeper than +clothes; “but I’m greatly in want of one to carry out parcels, and I +don’t mind if I try him. If he do steal anything, he’ll be caught +within the hour!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, thank you, sir!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“You shall have sixpence a day,” Mr. Maidstone continued, “—not a +penny more till I’m sure you’re an honest boy.”</p> + +<p>“Thank you, sir,” iterated Clare. “Please may I run home first? I +won’t be long. I ain’t got any other clothes, but——”</p> + +<p>“Hold your long tongue. Don’t let me hear it wagging in my +establishment. Go and wash your face and hands.” Clare turned to the +baker.</p> + +<p>“Please, sir,” he said softly, “may I go back with you and get the +piece of bread?”</p> + +<p>“What! begging already!” cried Mr. Maidstone.</p> + +<p>“No, no, sir,” interposed the baker. “I promised him a piece of +bread. He did not ask for it.”</p> + +<p>The good man was pleased at his success, and began to regard Clare +with the favour that springs in the heart of him who has done a good +turn to another through a third. Had he helped him out of his own +pocket, he might not have been so much pleased. But there had been no +loss, and there was no risk! He had beside shown his influence with a +superior!</p> + +<p>“I am so much obliged to you, sir!” said Clare as they went away +together. “I cannot tell you how much!”</p> + +<p>He was tempted to open his heart and reveal the fact that three people +would live on the sixpence a day which the baker’s kindness had +procured him, but prudence was fast coming frontward, and he saw that +no one must know that they were in that house! If it were known, they +would probably be turned out at once, which would go far to be fatal +to them as a family. For, if he had to pay for lodgings, were it no +more than the tramps paid Tommy’s grandmother, sixpence a day would +not suffice for bare shelter. So he held his tongue.</p> + +<p>“Thank me by minding Mr. Maidstone’s interests,” returned his +benefactor. “If you don’t do well by him, the blame will come upon +me.”</p> + +<p>“I will be very careful, sir,” answered Clare, who was too full of +honesty to think of being honest; he thought only of minding orders.</p> + +<p>They reached the shop; the baker gave him a small loaf, and he hurried +home with it. The joy in his heart, spread over the days since he left +the farm, would have given each a fair amount of gladness.</p> + +<p>Taking heed that no one saw him, he darted through the passage to the +well, got across it better this time, rushed over the wall like a cat, +fell on the other side from the unsteadiness of his potsherds, rose +and hurried into the house, with the feeble wail of his baby in his +ears.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXXI">Chapter XXXI.<br><span class="smcap">An Addition to the Family.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>The door to the kitchen was open: Tommy must be in the garden again! +When he reached the nursery, as he called it to himself, he found the +baby as he had left her, but moaning and wailing piteously. She looked +as if she had cried till she was worn out. He threw down the clothes +to take her. A great rat sprang from the bed. On one of the tiny feet +the long thin toes were bleeding and raw. The same instant arose a +loud scampering and scuffling and squealing in the room. Clare’s heart +quivered. He thought it was a whole army of rats. He was not a bit +afraid of them himself, but assuredly they were not company for baby! +Already they had smelt food in the house, and come in a swarm! What +was to be done with the little one? If he stayed at home with her, she +must die of hunger; if he left her alone, the rats would eat her! They +had begun already! Oh, that wretch, Tommy! Into the water-butt he +should go!</p> + +<p>I hope their friends will not take it ill that, all his life after, +Clare felt less kindly disposed toward rats than toward the rest of +the creatures of God.</p> + +<p>But things were not nearly so bad as Clare thought: the scuffling came +from quite another cause. It suddenly ceased, and a sharp scream +followed. Clare turned with the baby in his arms. Almost at his feet, +gazing up at him, the rat hanging limp from his jaws, stood the little +castaway mongrel he had seen in the morning, his eyes flaming, and his +tail wagging with wild homage and the delight of presenting the rat to +one he would fain make his master.</p> + +<p>“You darling!” cried Clare, and meant the dog this time, not the +baby. The animal dropped the dead rat at his feet, and glared, and +wagged, and looked hunger incarnate, but would not touch the rat until +Clare told him to take it. Then he retired with it to a corner, and +made a rapid meal of it.</p> + +<p>He had seen Clare pass the second time, had doubtless noted that now +he carried a loaf, and had followed him in humble hope. Clare was too +much occupied with his own joy to perceive him, else he would +certainly have given him a little peeling or two from the outside of +the bread. But it was decreed that the dog should have the honour of +rendering the first service. Clare was not to do <i>all</i> the +benevolences.</p> + +<p>What a happy day it had been for him! It was a day to be remembered +for ever! He had work! he had sixpence a day! he had had a present of +milk for the baby, and two presents of bread—one a small, and one a +large loaf! And now here was a dog! A dog was more than many meals! +The family was four now! A baby, and a dog to take care of the +baby!—It was heavenly!</p> + +<p>He made haste and gave his baby what milk and water was left. Then he +washed her poor torn foot, wrapped it in a pillow-case, for he would +not tear anything, and laid her in the bed. Next he cut a good big +crust from the loaf and gave it to the dog, who ate it as if the rat +were nowhere. The rest he put in a drawer. Then he washed his face and +hands—as well as he could without soap. After that, he took the dog, +talked to him a little, laid him on the bed beside the baby and talked +to him again, telling him plainly, and impressing upon him, that his +business was the care of the baby; that he must give himself up to +her; that he must watch and tend, and, if needful, fight for the +little one. When at length he left him, it was evident to Clare, by +the solemnity of the dog’s face, that he understood his duty +thoroughly.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXXII">Chapter XXXII.<br><span class="smcap">Shop and Baby.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Once clear of the well and the wall, Clare set off running like a +gaze-hound. Such was the change produced in him by joy and the +satisfaction of hope, that when he entered the shop, no one at first +knew him. His face was as the face of an angel, and none the less +beautiful that it shone above ragged garments. But Mr. Maidstone, the +moment he saw him, and before he had time to recognize him, turned +from the boy with dislike.</p> + +<p>“What a fool the beggar looks!” he said to himself;—then aloud to one +of the young men, “Hand over that parcel of sheets.—Here, +you!—what’s your name?”</p> + +<p>“Clare, sir.”</p> + +<p>“I declare against it!” he rejoined, with a coarse laugh of pleasure +at his own fancied wit. “I shall call you Jack!”</p> + +<p>“Very well, sir!”</p> + +<p>“Don’t you talk.—Here, Jack, take this parcel to Mrs. +Trueman’s. You’ll see the address on it.—And look sharp.—You can +read, can’t you?”</p> + +<p>The people in the shop stood looking on, some pitifully, all +curiously, for the parcel was of considerable size, and linen is +heavy, while the boy looked pale and thin. But Clare was strong for +his age, and present joy made up for past want. He scarcely looked at +the parcel which the draper proceeded to lay on his shoulder, stooped +a little as he felt its weight, heaved it a little to adjust its +balance, and holding it in its place with one hand, started for the +door, which the master himself held open for him.</p> + +<p>“Please, sir, which way do I turn?” he asked.</p> + +<p>“To the left,” answered Mr. Maidstone. “Ask your way as you go.”</p> + +<p>Clare forgot that he had heard only the lady’s name. Her address was +on the parcel, no doubt, but if he dropped it to look, he could not +get it up again by himself. A little way on, therefore, meeting a boy +about his own age returning from school, he asked him to be kind +enough to read the address on his back and direct him. The boy read it +aloud, but gave him false instructions for finding the place. Clare +walked and walked until the weight became almost unendurable, and at +last, though loath, concluded that the boy must have deceived him. He +asked again, but this time of a lady. She took pains not only to tell +him right, but to make him understand right: she was pleased with the +tired gentle face that looked up from beneath the heavy +burden. Perhaps she thought of the proud souls growing pure of their +pride, in Dante’s <i>Purgatorio</i>. Following her directions, he needed no +further questioning to find the house. But it was hours after the +burden was gone from his shoulder before it was rid of the phantom of +its weight.</p> + +<p>His master rated him for having been so long, and would not permit him +to explain his delay, ordering him to hold his tongue and not answer +back; but the rest of his day’s work was lighter; there was no other +heavy parcel to send out. There were so many smaller ones, however, +that, by the time they were all delivered, he had gained something +more than a general idea of how the streets lay, and was a weary wight +when, with the four-pence his master hesitated to give him on the +ground that he was doubtful of his character, he set out at last, +walking soberly enough now, to spend it at Mr. Ball’s and the +milk-shop. Of the former he bought a stale three-penny loaf, and the +baker added a piece to make up the weight. Clare took this for +liberality, and returned hearty thanks, which Mr. Ball, I am sorry to +say, was not man enough to repudiate. The other penny he laid out on +milk—but oh, how inferior it was to that the farmer’s wife had given +him! The milk-woman, however, not ungraciously granted him the two +matches he begged for.</p> + +<p>On his way to baby, he almost hoped Tommy would not return: he would +gladly be saved putting him in the water-butt!</p> + +<p>He forgot him again as he drew near the nursery, and for a long while +after he reached it. He found the infant and the dog lying as he had +left them. The only sign that either had moved was the strange +cleanness of the tiny gray face which Clare had not ventured to +wash. It gave indubitable evidence that the dog had been licking it +more than a little—probably every few minutes since he was left +curate in charge.</p> + +<p>And now Clare did with deliberation a thing for which his sensitive +conscience not unfrequently reproached him afterward. His defence was, +that he had hurt nobody, and had kept baby alive by it. Having in his +mind revolved the matter many a time that day, he got some sticks +together from the garden, and with one of the precious matches lighted +a small fire of coals that were not his own, and for which he could +merely hope one day to restore amends. But baby! Baby was more than +coals! He filled a rusty kettle with water, and while it was growing +hot on the fire, such was his fear lest the smoke should betray them, +that he ran out every other minute to see how much was coming from the +chimney.</p> + +<p>While the fire was busy heating the water, he was busier preparing a +bottle for baby—making a hole through the cork of a phial, putting the +broken stem of a clean tobacco pipe he had found in the street through +the hole, tying a small lump of cotton wool over the end of the +pipe-stem, and covering that with a piece of his pocket-handkerchief, +carefully washed with the brown Windsor soap, his mother’s last present. +For the day held yet another gladness: in looking for a kettle he had +found the soap—which probably the rat had carried away and hidden +before finding baby. Through the pipe-stem and the wool and the +handkerchief he could without difficulty draw water, and hoped therefore +baby would succeed in drawing her supper. As soon as the water was warm +he mixed some with the milk, but not so much this time, and put the +mixture in the bottle. To his delight, the baby sucked it up splendidly. +The bottle, thought out between the heavy linen and the hard street, was +a success! Labour is not unfriendly to thought, as the annals of weaving +and shoe-making witness.</p> + +<p>And now at last was Clare equipped for a great attempt: he was going +to wash the baby! He was glad that disrespectful Tommy was not in the +house. With a basin of warm water and his precious piece of soap he +set about it, and taking much pains, washed his treasure perfectly +clean. It was a state of bliss in which, up to that moment, I presume, +she had never been since her birth. In the process he handled her, if +not with all the skill of a nurse, yet with the tenderness of a +mother. His chief anxiety was not to hurt, more than could not be +helped, the poor little rat-eaten toes. He felt he must wash them, but +when in the process she whimpered, it went all through the calves of +his legs. When the happy but solicitous task was over, during which +the infant had shown the submission of great weakness, he wrapped her +in another blanket, and laid her down again. Soothed and comfortable, +as probably never soothed or comfortable before, she went to sleep.</p> + +<p>As soon as she was out of his arms, he took a piece of bread, and with +some of the hot water made a little sop for the dog, which the small +hero, whose four legs carried such a long barrel of starvation, ate +with undisguised pleasure and thankfulness. For his own supper Clare +preferred his bread dry, following it with a fine draught of water +from the well.</p> + +<p>Then, and not till then, returned the thought—what had Tommy done +with himself? Left to himself he was sure to go stealing! He might +have been taken in the act! Clare could hardly believe he had actually +run away from him. On the other hand, he had left the baby, and knew +that if he returned he would be put in the water-butt! He might have +come to the conclusion that he could do better without Clare, who +would not let him steal! It was clear he did not like taking his share +in the work of the family, and looking after the baby! Had he been +anything of a true boy, Clare would have taken his bread in his hand +and gone to look for him; being such as he was, he did not think it +necessary. He felt bound to do his best for him if he came back, but +he did not feel bound to leave the baby and roam the country to find a +boy with whom baby’s life would be in constant danger.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXXIII">Chapter XXXIII.<br><span class="smcap">A Bad Penny.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Before Clare had done his thinking, darkness had fallen, and, weary to +the very bones, he threw himself on the bed beside the baby. The dog +jumped up and laid himself at his feet, as if the place had been his +from time immemorial—as it had perhaps been, according to time in +dog-land. The many pleasures of that blessed day would have kept Clare +awake had they not brought with them so much weariness. He fell fast +asleep. Tommy had not had a happy day: he had been found out in +evil-doing, had done more evil, and had all the day been in dread of +punishment. He did not foresee how ill things would go for him—did +not see that a rat had taken his place beside the baby, and that he +would not get back before Clare; but the vision of the water-butt had +often flashed upon his inner eye, and it had not been the bliss of his +solitude. He deserted his post in the hope of finding something to +eat, and had not had a mouthful of anything but spongy turnip, and +dried-up mangel-wurzel, or want-root. If he had been minding his work, +he would have had a piece of good bread—so good that he would have +wanted more of it, whereas, when he had eaten the turnip and the +beetroot, he had cause to wish he had not eaten so much! He had been +set upon by boys bigger than himself, and nearly as bad, who, not +being hungry, were in want of amusement, and had proceeded to get it +out of Tommy, just as Tommy would have got it out of the baby had he +dared. They bullied him in a way that would have been to his heart’s +content, had he been the bully instead of the bullied. They made him +actually wish he had stayed with the baby—and therewith came the +thought that it was time to go home if he would get back before +Clare. As to what had taken place in the morning, he knew Clare’s +forgivingness, and despised him for it. If he found the baby dead, or +anything happened to her that he could not cover with lying, it would +be time to cut and run in earnest! So the moment he could escape from +his tormenters, off went Tommy for home. But as he ran he remembered +that there was but one way into the house, and that was by the very +lip of the water-butt.</p> + +<p>Clare woke up suddenly—at a sound which all his life would wake him +from the deepest slumber: he thought he heard the whimpering of a +child. The baby was fast asleep. Instantly he thought of Tommy. He +seemed to see him shut out in the night, and knew at once how it was +with him: he had gone out without thinking how he was to get back, and +dared not go near the water-butt! He jumped out of bed, put on his +shoes, and in a minute or two was over the wall and walking along the +lane outside of it, to find the deserter.</p> + +<p>The moon was not up, and the night was dark, yet he had not looked +long before he came upon him, as near the house as he could get, +crouching against the wall.</p> + +<p>“Tommy!” said Clare softly.</p> + +<p>Tommy did not reply. The fear of the water-butt was upon him—a fear +darker than the night, an evil worse than hunger or cold—and Clare +and the water-butt were one.</p> + +<p>“You needn’t think to hide, Tommy; I see you, you bad boy!” whispered +Clare. “After all I said, you ran away and left the baby to the rats! +They’ve been biting her horribly—one at least has. You can stay away +as long as you like now; I’ve got a better nurse. Good-night!” Tommy +gave a great howl.</p> + +<p>“Hold your tongue, you rascal!” cried Clare, still in a +whisper. “You’ll let the police know where we are!”</p> + +<p>“Do let me in, Clare! I’m so ’ungry and so cold!”</p> + +<p>“Then I shall have to put you in the water-butt! I said I would!”</p> + +<p>“If you don’t promise not to, I’ll go straight to the police. They’ll +take the brat from you, and put her in the workhouse!”</p> + +<p>Clare thought for a moment whether it would not be right to kill such +a traitor. His mind was full of history-tales, and, like Dante, he put +treachery in its own place, namely the deepest hell. But with the +thought came the words he had said so many times without thinking what +they meant—“Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that +trespass against us,” and he saw that he was expected to forgive +Tommy.</p> + +<p>“Tommy, I forgive you,” he said solemnly, “and will be friends with +you again; but I have said it, and I was right to say it, and into the +water-butt you must go! I can’t trust your word now, and I think I +shall be able to trust it after that.”</p> + +<p>Ere he had finished the words, Tommy lifted up his voice in a most +unearthly screech.</p> + +<p>Instantly Clare had him by the throat, so that he could not utter a +sound.</p> + +<p>“Tommy,” he said, “I’m going to let you breathe again, but the moment +you make a noise, I’ll choke you as I’m doing now.”</p> + +<p>With that he relaxed his hold. But Tommy had paid no heed to what he +said, and began a second screech the moment he found passage for +it. Immediately he was choked, and after two or three attempts, +finally desisted.</p> + +<p>“I won’t!” he said.</p> + +<p>“You shall, Tommy. You’re going head over in the butt. We’re going to +it now!”</p> + +<p>Tommy threw himself upon the ground and kicked, but dared not +scream. It was awful! He would drop right through into the great place +where the moon was!</p> + +<p>Clare threw him over his shoulder, and found him not half the weight +of the parcel of linen. Tommy would have bitten like a weasel, but he +feared Clare’s terrible hands. He was on the back of Giant Despair, in +the form of one of the best boys in the world. Clare took him round +the wall, and over the fence into the blacksmith’s yard. The smithy +was quite dark.</p> + +<p>“Please, I didn’t mean to do it!” sobbed Tommy from behind him, as +Clare bore him steadily up the yard. It was all he could do to say the +words, for the thought of what they were approaching sent a scream +into his throat every time he parted his lips to speak.</p> + +<p>Clare stopped.</p> + +<p>“What didn’t you mean to do?” he asked.</p> + +<p>“I didn’t mean to leave the baby.”</p> + +<p>“How did you do it then?”</p> + +<p>“I mean I didn’t mean to stay away so long. I didn’t know how to get +back.”</p> + +<p>“I told you not to leave her! And you could have got back perfectly, +you little coward!”</p> + +<p>Tommy shuddered, and said no more. Though hanging over Clare’s back, he +knew presently, by his stopping, that they had come to the heap. There +was only that heap and the wall between him and the water-butt! Up and +up he felt himself slowly, shakingly carried, and was gathering his +breath for a final utterance of agony that should rouse the whole +neighbourhood, when Clare, having reached the top, seated himself upon +the wall, and Tommy restrained himself in the hope of what a parley +might bring. But he sat down only to wheel on the pivot of his spine, +as he had seen them do on the counter in the shop, and sit with his +legs alongside of the water-butt. Then he drew Tommy from his shoulder, +in spite of his clinging, and laid him across his knees; and Tommy, +divining there were words yet to be said, and hoping to get off with a +beating, which he did not mind, remained silent.</p> + +<p>“Your hour is come, Tommy!” said Clare. “If you scream, I will drop +you in, and hold you only by one leg. If you don’t scream, I will hold +you by both legs. If you scream when I take you out, in you go again! +I do what I say, Tommy!”</p> + +<p>The wretched boy was nearly mad with terror. But now, much as he +feared the water, he feared yet more for the moment him in whom lay +the power of the water. Clare took him by the heels.</p> + +<p>“I’m sorry there’s no moon, as I promised you,” he said; “she won’t +come up for my calling. I should have liked you to see where you were +going. But if you ain’t an honest boy after this, you shall have +another chance; and next time we will wait for the moon!”</p> + +<p>With that he lifted Tommy’s legs, holding him by the ankles, and would +have shoved his body over the edge of the butt into the water. But +Tommy clung fast to his knees.</p> + +<p>“Leave go, Tommy,” he said, “or I’ll tumble you right in.”</p> + +<p>Tommy yielded, his will overcome by a greater fear. Clare let him hang +for a moment over the black water, and slowly lowered him. Tommy clung +to the side of the butt. Clare let go one leg, and taking hold of his +hands pulled them away. Tommy’s terror would have burst in a frenzied +yell, but the same instant he was down to the neck in the water, and +lifted out again. He spluttered and gurgled and tried to scream.</p> + +<p>“Now, Tommy,” said Clare, “don’t scream, or I’ll put you in again.”</p> + +<p>But Tommy never believed anything except upon compulsion. The moment +he could, that moment he screamed, and that moment he was in the water +again. The next time he was taken out, he did not scream. Clare laid +him on the wall, and he lay still, pretending to be drowned. Clare got +up, set him on his feet in front of him, and holding him by the +collar, trotted him round the top of the wall to the door, and dropped +him into the garden. He was quiet enough now—more than +subdued—incapable even of meditating revenge. But when they entered +the nursery, the dog, taking Tommy for a worse sort of rat, made a +leap at him right off the bed, as if he would swallow him alive, and +the start and the terror of it brought him quite to himself again.</p> + +<p>“Quiet, Abdiel!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>The dog turned, jumped up on the bed, and lay down again close to the +baby.</p> + +<p>Clare, who, I have said, was in old days a reader of <i>Paradise Lost</i>, +had already given him the name of <i>Abdiel</i>.</p> + +<p>“Please, I couldn’t help yelling!” said Tommy, very meekly. “I didn’t +know you’d got <i>him</i>!”</p> + +<p>“I know you couldn’t help it!” answered Clare. “What have you had to +eat to-day?”</p> + +<p>“Nothing but a beastly turnip and a wormy beet,” said Tommy. “I’m +awful hungry.”</p> + +<p>“You’d have had something better if you’d stuck by the baby, and not +left her to the rats!”</p> + +<p>“There ain’t no rats,” growled Tommy.</p> + +<p>“Will you believe your own eyes?” returned Clare, and showed him the +skin of the rat Abdiel had slain. “I’ve a great mind to make you eat +it!” he added, dangling it before him by the tail.</p> + +<p>“Shouldn’t mind,” said Tommy. “I’ve eaten a rat afore now, an’ I’m +that hungry! Rats ain’t bad to eat. I don’t know about their skins!”</p> + +<p>“Here’s a piece of bread for you. But you sha’n’t sleep with honest +people like baby and Abdiel. You shall lie on the hearth-rug. Here’s a +blanket and a pillow for you!”</p> + +<p>Clare covered him up warm, thatching all with a piece of loose carpet, +and he was asleep directly.</p> + +<p>The next day all terror of the water-butt was gone from the little +vagabond’s mind. He was now, however, thoroughly afraid of Clare, and +his conceit that, though Clare was the stronger, he was the cleverer, +was put in abeyance.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXXIV">Chapter XXXIV.<br><span class="smcap">How Things went for a Time.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Clare’s next day went much as the preceding, only that he was early at +the shop. When his dinner-hour came, he ran home, and was glad to find +Tommy and the dog mildly agreeable to each other. He had but time to +give baby some milk, and Tommy and Abdiel a bit of bread each.</p> + +<p>His look when he returned, a look of which he was unaware, but which +one of the girls, who had a year ago been hungry for weeks together, +could read, made her ask him what he had had for dinner. He said he +had had no dinner.</p> + +<p>“Why?” she asked.</p> + +<p>“Because there wasn’t any.”</p> + +<p>“Didn’t your mother keep some for you?”</p> + +<p>“No; she couldn’t.”</p> + +<p>“Then what will you do?”</p> + +<p>“Go without,” answered Clare with a smile.</p> + +<p>“But you’ve got a mother?” said the girl, rendered doubtful by his +smile.</p> + +<p>“Oh, yes! I’ve got two mothers. But their arms ain’t long enough,” +replied Clare.</p> + +<p>The girl wondered: was he an idiot, or what they called a poet? +Anyhow, she had a bun in her pocket, which she had meant to eat at +five o’clock, and she offered him that.</p> + +<p>“But what will you do yourself? Have you another?” asked Clare, +unready to take it.</p> + +<p>“No,” she answered; “why shouldn’t I go without as well as you?”</p> + +<p>“Because it won’t make things any better. There will be just as much +hunger. It’s only shifting it from me to you. That will leave it all +the same!”</p> + +<p>“No, not the same,” she returned. “I’ve had a good dinner—as much as +I could eat; and you’ve had none!”</p> + +<p>Clare was persuaded, and ate the girl’s bun with much satisfaction and +gratitude.</p> + +<p>When he had his wages in the evening, he spent them as before—a penny +for the baby, and fivepence at Mr. Ball’s for Tommy, Abdiel, and +himself.</p> + +<p>Observing that he came daily, and spent all he earned, except one +penny, on bread; seeing also that the boy’s cheeks, though plainly he +was in good health, were very thin, Mr. Ball wondered a little: a boy +ought to look better than that on five pennyworth of bread a day!</p> + +<p>They were a curious family—Clare, and Tommy, and the baby, and +Abdiel. But the only thing sad about it was, that Clare, who was the +head and the heart of it, and provided for all, should be upheld by no +human sympathy, no human gratitude; that he should be so high above +his companions that, though he never thought he was lonely, he could +not help feeling lonely. Not once did he wish himself rid of any +single member of his adopted family. It was living on his very body; +he was growing a little thinner every day; if things had gone on so, +he must before long have fallen ill; but he never thought of himself +at all, body or soul.</p> + +<p>He had no human sympathy or gratitude, I say, but he had both sympathy +and gratitude from Abdiel. The dog never failed to understand what +Clare wished and expected him to understand. In Clare’s absence he +took on himself the protection of the establishment, and was Tommy’s +superior.</p> + +<p>Though Tommy was of no use to earn bread, Clare did not therefore +allow him to be idle. He insisted on his keeping the place clean and +tidy, and in this respect Tommy was not quite a failure. He even made +him do some washing, though not much could be accomplished in that way +where there was so little to wash. Now that Abdiel was nurse, Tommy +had the run of the garden, and often went beyond it for an hour or two +without Clare’s knowledge, but always took good care to be back before +his return.</p> + +<p>A bale of goods happening to be unpacked in his presence one day, +Clare begged the head-shopman, who was also a partner, for a piece of +what it was wrapped in; and he, having noted how well he worked, and +being quite aware they could not get another such boy at such wages, +gave him a large piece of the soiled canvas. Now Mrs. Porson had +taught Clare to work,—as I think all boys ought to be taught, so as +not to be helpless without mother or sister,—and with the help of a +needle and some thread the friendly girl gave him, he soon made of the +packing-sheet a pair of trousers for Tommy, of a primitive but not +unserviceable cut, and a shirt for himself, of fashion more primitive +still. He managed it this way: he cut a hole in the middle of a piece +of the stuff, through which to put his head, and another hole on each +side of that, through which to put his arms, and hemmed them all +round. Then, having first hemmed the garment also, he indued it, and +let the voluminous mass arrange itself as it might, under as much of +his jacket and trousers as cohered.</p> + +<p>My reader may well wonder how, in what was called a respectable shop, +he could be permitted to appear in such poverty; but Mr. Maidstone +disliked the boy so much that he meant to send him away the moment he +found another to do his work, and gave orders that he should never +come up from the basement except when wanted to carry a parcel. The +fact was that his still, solemn, pure face was a haunting rebuke to +his master, although he did not in the least recognize the nature, or +this as the cause, of his dislike.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXXV">Chapter XXXV.<br><span class="smcap">Clare disregards the Interests of his Employers.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Things went on for nearly a month, every one thriving but Clare. Yet +was Clare as peaceful as any, and much happier than Tommy, to whose +satisfaction adventure was needful.</p> + +<p>One day, a lady, attracted by a muff in the shop-window labelled with +a very low price, entered, and requested to see it.</p> + +<p>“We can offer you a choice from several of the sort, madam,” said the +shopman. “It is one of a lot we bought cheap, but quite uninjured, +after a fire.”</p> + +<p>“I want to see the one in the window,” the lady answered.</p> + +<p>“I hope you will excuse me, madam,” returned the shopman. “The muff is +in a position hard to reach. Besides, we must ask leave to take +anything down after the window is dressed for the day, and the master +is out. But I will bring you the same fur precisely.”</p> + +<p>So saying, he went, and returned presently with a load of muffs and +other furs, which he threw on the counter. But the lady had heard that +“there’s tricks i’ the world,” and persisted in demanding a sight of +the muff in the window. Being a “tall personage” and cool, she carried +her point. The muff was hooked down and brought her—not +graciously. She glanced at it, turned it over, looked inside, and +said,</p> + +<p>“I will take it. Please bring a bandbox for it.”</p> + +<p>“I will, madam,” said the man, and would have taken the muff. But she +held it fast, sought her purse, and laid the price on the counter. The +shopman saw that she knew what both of them were about, took up the +money, went and fetched a bandbox, put the muff in it before her eyes, +and tied it up. The lady held out her hand for it.</p> + +<p>“Shall I not send it for you, madam?” he said.</p> + +<p>“I do not live here,” she answered. “I am on my way to the station.”</p> + +<p>“Here, Jack,” cried the shopman to Clare, whom he caught sight of that +moment going down to the basement, “take this bandbox, and go with the +lady to the station.”</p> + +<p>If his transaction with the lady had pleased the man, he would not +have sent such a scarecrow to attend her, although she did not belong +to the town, and they might never see her again! The lady, on her +part, was about to insist on carrying the bandbox herself; but when +Clare came forward, and looked up smiling in her face, she was at once +aware that she might trust him. The man stood watching for the moment +when she should turn her back, that he might substitute another +bandbox for the one Clare carried; but Clare never looked at him, and +when the lady walked out of the shop, walked straight out after +her. Along the street he followed her steadily, she looking round +occasionally to see that he was behind her.</p> + +<p>They had gone about half-way to the station, when from a side street +came a lad whom Clare knew as one employed in the packing-room. He +carried a box exactly like that Clare had in his hand, and came softly +up behind him. Clare did not turn his head, for he did not want to +talk to him while he was attending on the lady.</p> + +<p>“Look spry!” he said in a whisper. “She don’t twig! It’s all right! +Maidstone sent me.”</p> + +<p>Clare looked round. The lad held out his bandbox for him to take, and +his empty hand to take Clare’s instead. But Clare had by this time +begun to learn a little caution. Besides, the lady’s interests were in +his care, and he could be party to nothing done behind her back! He +had not time to think, but knew it his duty to stick by the +bandbox. If we have come up through the animals to be what we are, +Clare must have been a dog of a good, faithful breed, for he did right +now as by some ancient instinct. He held fast to the box, neither +slackening his pace nor uttering a word. The lad gave him a great +punch. Clare clung the harder to the box. The lady heard something, +and turned her head. The boy already had his back to her, and was +walking away, but she saw that Clare’s face was flushed.</p> + +<p>“What is the matter?” she asked.</p> + +<p>“I don’t rightly know, ma’am. He wanted me to give him my bandbox for +his, and said Mr. Maidstone had sent him. But I couldn’t, you +know!—except he asked you first. You did pay for it—didn’t you, +ma’am?”</p> + +<p>“Of course I did, or he wouldn’t have let me take it away! But if you +don’t know what it means, I do.—You haven’t been in that shop long, +have you?”</p> + +<p>“Not quite a month, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>“I thought so!”</p> + +<p>She said no more, and Clare followed in silence, wondering not a +little. When they reached the station, she took the bandbox, and +looked at the boy. He returned her gaze, his gray eyes wondering. She +searched her purse for a shilling, but, unable to find one, was not +sorry to give him a half-crown instead.</p> + +<p>“You had better not mention that I gave you anything,” she said.</p> + +<p>“I will not, ma’am, except they ask me,” he answered.</p> + +<p>“But,” he added, his face in a glow of delight, “is all this for me?”</p> + +<p>“To be sure,” she answered. “I am much obliged to you for—carrying my +parcel. Be a honest boy whatever comes, and you will not repent it.”</p> + +<p>“I will try, ma’am,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>But, to speak accurately, he did not know what it was to <i>try</i> to be +honest: he had never been tempted to be anything else, and had +scarcely had the idea of dishonesty in his mind except in relation to +Tommy. Do you say, “Then it was no merit to him”? Certainly it was +none. Who was thinking of merit? Not Clare. He is a sneak who thinks +of merit. He is a cad who can’t do a gentlemanly action without +thinking himself a fine fellow! It might be a merit in many a man to +act as Clare did, but in Clare it was pure rightness—or, if you like +the word better, righteousness.</p> + +<p>Clare as little thought what awaited him. Had there been any truth, +any appreciation of honesty in his vulgar heart, Mr. Maidstone could +not have done as now he did. When his messenger came back with the +tale of how he had been foiled, he said nothing, but his lips grew +white. He closed them fast, and went and stood near the door. When +Clare, unsuspecting as innocent, opened it, he was met by a blow that +dazed him, and a fierce kick that sent him on his back to the +curbstone. Almost insensible, but with the impression that something +was interfering between him and his work, he returned to the door. As +he laid his hand on it, it opened a little, and his master’s face, +with a hateful sneer upon it, shot into the crack, and spit in +his. Then the door shut so sharply that his fingers caught an +agonizing pinch. At last he understood: he was turned off, and his +day’s wages were lost!</p> + +<p>What would have become of him now but for the half-crown the lady had +given him! She was not <i>quite</i> a lady, or she would have walked out of +the shop, and declined to gain by frustrating a swindle; but she was a +good-hearted woman, and God’s messenger to Clare. He bought a bigger +loaf than usual, at which, and the time of the day when he bought it, +and the half-crown presented in payment, Mr. Ball wondered; but +neither said anything—Mr. Ball from indecision, Clare from eagerness +to get home to his family.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXXVI">Chapter XXXVI.<br><span class="smcap">The Policeman.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>But, alas! Clare had made another enemy—the lad whose attempt to +change the bandboxes he had foiled. The fellow followed him, +lurkingly, all the way home—on the watch for fit place to pounce upon +him, and punish him for doing right when he wanted him to do wrong. He +saw him turn into the opening that led to the well, and thought now he +had him. But when he followed him in, he was not to be seen! He did +not care to cross the well, not knowing what might meet him on the +other side; but here was news to carry back! He did so; and his master +saw in them the opportunity of indulging his dislike and revenge, and +a means of invalidating whatever Clare might reveal to his discredit!</p> + +<p>Clare and the baby and Tommy and Abdiel had taken their supper with +satisfaction, and were all asleep. It was to them as the middle of the +night, though it was but past ten o’clock, when Abdiel all at once +jumped right up on his four legs, cocked his ears, listened, leaped +off the bed, ran to the door, and began to bark furiously. He was +suddenly blinded by the glare of a bull’s-eye-lantern, and received a +kick that knocked all the bark out of him, and threw him to the other +side of the room. A huge policeman strode quietly in, sending the +glare of his bull’s-eye all about the room like a vital, inquiring +glance. It discovered, one after the other, every member of the +family. So tired was Clare, however, that he did not wake until seized +by a rough hand, and at one pull dragged standing on the floor.</p> + +<p>“Take care of the baby!” he cried, while yet not half awake.</p> + +<p>“<i>I’ll</i> take care o’ the baby, never fear!—an’ o’ you too, you young +rascal!” returned the policeman.</p> + +<p>He roused Tommy, who was wide awake, but pretending to be asleep, with +a gentle kick.</p> + +<p>“Up ye get!” he said; and Tommy got up, rubbing his ferret eyes.</p> + +<p>“Come along!” said the policeman.</p> + +<p>“Where to?” asked Clare.</p> + +<p>“You’ll see when you get there.”</p> + +<p>“But I can’t leave baby!”</p> + +<p>“Baby must come along too,” answered the policeman, more gently, for +he had children of his own.</p> + +<p>“But she has no clothes to go in!” objected Clare.</p> + +<p>“She must go without, then.”</p> + +<p>“But she’ll take cold!”</p> + +<p>“She don’t run naked in the house, do she?”</p> + +<p>“No; she can’t run yet. I keep her in a blanket. But the blanket ain’t +mine; I can’t take it with me.”</p> + +<p>“You’re mighty scrup’lous!” returned the policeman. “You don’t mind +takin’ a ’ole ’ouse an’ garding, but you wouldn’ think o’ takin’ a +blanket!—Oh, no! Honest boy <i>you</i> are!”</p> + +<p>He turned sharp round, and caught Tommy taking a vigorous sight at +him. Tommy, courageous as a lion behind anybody’s back, dropped on the +rug sitting.</p> + +<p>“We’ve done the house no harm,” said Clare, “and I will <i>not</i> take the +blanket. It would be stealing!”</p> + +<p>“Then I will take it, and be accountable for it,” rejoined the man. “I +hope that will satisfy you!”</p> + +<p>“Certainly,” answered Clare. “You are a policeman, and that makes it +all right.”</p> + +<p>“Rouse up then, and come along. I want to get home.”</p> + +<p>“Please, sir, wouldn’t it do in the morning?” pleaded Clare. “I’ve no +work now, and could easily go then. That way we should all have a +sleep.”</p> + +<p>“My eye ain’t green enough,” replied the policeman. “Look sharp!”</p> + +<p>Clare said no more, but went to the baby. With sinking but courageous +heart, he wrapped her closer in her blanket, and took her in his +arms. He could not help her crying, but she did not scream. Indeed she +never really screamed; she was not strong enough to scream.</p> + +<p>“Get along,” said the policeman.</p> + +<p>Clare led the way with his bundle, sorely incommoded by the size and +weight of the wrapping blanket, the corners of which, one after the +other, would keep working from his hold, and dropping and trailing on +the ground. Behind him came Tommy, a scarecrow monkey, with +mischievous face, and greedy beads for eyes—type not unknown to the +policeman, who brought up the rear, big enough to have all their sizes +cut out of him, and yet pass for a man. Down the stair they went, and +out at the front door, which Clare for the first time saw open, and so +by the iron gate into the street.</p> + +<figure class="figcenter illowp47" id="001" style="max-width: 39.25em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/001.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">Clare, Tommy, and the baby in custody.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>“Which way, please?” asked Clare, turning half round with the +question.</p> + +<p>“To the right, straight ahead. The likes o’ you, young un, might know +the way to the lock-up without astin’!”</p> + +<p>Clare made no answer, but walked obedient. It was a sad +procession—comical indeed, but too sad when realized to continue +ludicrous. The thin, long-bodied, big-headed, long-haired, +long-tailed, short-legged animal that followed last, seemed to close +it with a never-ending end.</p> + +<p>There was no moon; nothing but the gas-lamps lighted Clare’s _Via +dolorosa_. He hugged the baby and kept on, laying his cheek to hers to +comfort her, and receiving the comfort he did not seek.</p> + +<p>They came at last to the <i>lock-up</i>, a new building in the rear of the +town-house. There this tangle of humanity, torn from its rock and +afloat on the social sea, drifted trailing into a bare brilliant room, +and at its head, cast down but not destroyed, went heavy-laden Clare, +with so much in him, but only his misery patent to eyes too much used +to misery to reap sorrow from the sight.</p> + +<p>The head policeman—they called him the inspector—received the +charge, that of house-breaking, and entered it. Then they were taken +away to the lock-up—all but the faithful Abdiel, who, following, +received another of the kicks which that day rained on every member of +that epitome of the human family except the baby, who, small enough +for a mother to drown, was too small for a policeman to kick. The door +was shut upon them, and they had to rest in that grave till the +resurrection of the morning should bring them before the magistrate.</p> + +<p>Their quarters were worse than chilly—to all but the baby in her +blanket manifoldly wrapped about her, and in Clare’s arms. Tommy would +gladly have shared that blanket, more gladly yet would have taken it +all for himself and left the baby to perish; but he had to lie on the +broad wooden bench and make the best of it, which he did by snoring +all the night. It passed drearily for Clare, who kept wide awake. He +was not anxious about the morrow; he had nothing to be ashamed of, +therefore nothing to fear; but he had baby to protect and cherish, and +he dared not go to sleep.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXXVII">Chapter XXXVII.<br><span class="smcap">The Magistrate.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>The dawn came at last, and soon after the dawn footsteps, but they +approached only to recede. When the door at length opened, it was but +to let a pair of eyes glance round on them, and close again. The hours +seemed to be always beginning, and never going on. But at the long +last came the big policeman. To Clare’s loving eyes, how friendly he +looked!</p> + +<p>“Come, kids!” he said, and took them through a long passage to a room +in the town-hall, where sat a formal-looking old gentleman behind a +table.</p> + +<p>“Good morning, sir!” said Clare, to the astonishment of the +magistrate, who set his politeness down as impudence.</p> + +<p>Nor was the mistake to be wondered at; for the baby in Clare’s arms +hid, with the mountain-like folds of its blanket, the greater part of +his face, and the old gentleman’s eyes fell first on Tommy; and if +ever <i>scamp</i> was written clear on a countenance, it was written clear +on Tommy’s.</p> + +<p>“Hold your impudent tongue!” said a policeman, and gave Clare a cuff +on the head.</p> + +<p>“Hold, John,” interposed the magistrate; “it is my part to punish, not +yours.”</p> + +<p>“Thank you, sir,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“I will thank <i>you</i>, sir,” returned the magistrate, “not to speak till +I put to you the questions I am about to put to you.—What is the +charge against the prisoners?”</p> + +<p>“Housebreaking, sir,” answered the big man.</p> + +<p>“What! Housebreaking! Boys with a baby! House-breakers don’t generally +go about with babies in their arms! Explain the thing.”</p> + +<p>The policeman said he had received information that unlawful +possession had been taken of a building commonly known as The Haunted +House, which had been in Chancery for no one could tell how many +years. He had gone to see, and had found the accused in possession of +the best bedroom—fast asleep, surrounded by indications that they had +made themselves at home there for some time. He had brought them +along.</p> + +<p>The magistrate turned his eyes on Clare.</p> + +<p>“You hear what the policeman says?” he said.</p> + +<p>“Yes, sir,” answered Clare.</p> + +<p>“Well?”</p> + +<p>“Sir?”</p> + +<p>“What have you to say to it?”</p> + +<p>“Nothing, sir.”</p> + +<p>“Then you allow it is true?”</p> + +<p>“Yes, sir.”</p> + +<p>“What right had you to be there?”</p> + +<p>“None, sir. But we had nowhere else to go, and nobody seemed to want +the place. We didn’t hurt anything. We swept away a multitude of dead +moths, and killed a lot of live ones, and destroyed a whole granary of +grubs; and the dog killed a great rat.”</p> + +<p>“What is your name?”</p> + +<p>“Clare—Porson,” answered Clare, with a little intervening hesitation.</p> + +<p>“You are not quite sure?”</p> + +<p>“Yes; that is my name; but I have another older one that I don’t +know.”</p> + +<p>“A bad answer! The name you go by is not your own! Hum! Is that boy +your brother?”</p> + +<p>“No, sir.”</p> + +<p>“Your cousin?”</p> + +<p>“No, sir; he’s not any relation of mine. He’s a tramp.”</p> + +<p>“And what are you?”</p> + +<p>“Something like one now, sir, but I wasn’t always.”</p> + +<p>“What were you?”</p> + +<p>“Not much, sir. I didn’t <i>do</i> anything till just lately.”</p> + +<p>He could not bear at the moment to talk of his beloved dead. He felt +as if the old gentleman would be rude to them.</p> + +<p>“Is the infant there your sister?”</p> + +<p>“She’s my sister the big way: God made her. She’s not my sister any +other way.”</p> + +<p>“How does she come to be with you then?”</p> + +<p>“I took her out of the water-butt. Some one threw her in, and I heard +the splash, and went and got her out.”</p> + +<p>“Why did you not take her to the police?”</p> + +<p>“I never thought of that. It was all I could do to keep her alive. I +couldn’t have done it if we hadn’t got into the house.”</p> + +<p>“How long ago is that?”</p> + +<p>“Nearly a month, sir.”</p> + +<p>“And you’ve kept her there ever since?”</p> + +<p>“Yes, sir—as well as I could. I had only sixpence a day.”</p> + +<p>“And what’s that boy’s name?”</p> + +<p>“Tommy, sir.—I don’t know any other.”</p> + +<p>“Nice respectable company you keep for one who has evidently been well +brought up!”</p> + +<p>“Baby’s quite respectable, sir!”</p> + +<p>“Hum!”</p> + +<p>“And for Tommy, if I didn’t keep him, he would steal. I’m teaching him +not to steal.”</p> + +<p>“What woman have you got with you?”</p> + +<p>“Baby’s the only woman we’ve got, sir.”</p> + +<p>“But who attends to her?”</p> + +<p>“I do, sir. She only wants washing and rolling round in the blanket; +she’s got no clothes to speak of. When I’m away, Tommy and Abdiel take +care of her.”</p> + +<p>“Abdiel! Who on earth is that? Where is he?” said the magistrate, +looking round for some fourth member of the incomprehensible family.</p> + +<p>“He’s not on earth, sir; he’s in heaven—the good angel, you know, +sir, that left Satan and came back again to God.”</p> + +<p>“You must take him to the county-asylum, James!” said the magistrate, +turning to the tall policeman.</p> + +<p>“Oh, he’s all right, sir!” said James.</p> + +<p>“Please, sir,” interrupted Clare eagerly, “I didn’t mean the dog was +in heaven yet. I meant the angel I named him after!”</p> + +<p>“They <i>had</i> a little dog with them, sir!”</p> + +<p>“Yes—Abdiel. He wanted to be a prisoner too, but they wouldn’t let +him in. He’s a good dog—better than Tommy.”</p> + +<p>“So! like all the rest of you, you can keep a dog!”</p> + +<p>“He followed me home because he hadn’t anybody to love,” said +Clare. “He don’t have much to eat, but he’s content. He would eat +three times as much if I could give it him; but he never complains.”</p> + +<p>“Have you work of any sort?”</p> + +<p>“I had till yesterday, sir.”</p> + +<p>“Where?”</p> + +<p>“At Mr. Maidstone’s shop.”</p> + +<p>“What wages had you?”</p> + +<p>“Sixpence a day.”</p> + +<p>“And you lived, all three of you, on that?”</p> + +<p>“Yes; all four of us, sir.”</p> + +<p>“What do you do at the shop?”</p> + +<p>“Please your worship,” interposed policeman James, “he was sent about +his business yesterday.”</p> + +<p>“Yes,” rejoined Clare, who did not understand the phrase, “I was sent +with a lady to carry her bandbox to the station.”</p> + +<p>“And when you came back, you was turned away, wasn’t you?” said James.</p> + +<p>“Yes, sir.”</p> + +<p>“What had you done?” asked the magistrate.</p> + +<p>“I don’t quite know, sir.”</p> + +<p>“A likely story!”</p> + +<p>Clare made no reply.</p> + +<p>“Answer me directly.”</p> + +<p>“Please, sir, you told me not to speak unless you asked me a +question.”</p> + +<p>“I said, ‘A likely story!’ which meant, ‘Do you expect me to believe +that?’”</p> + +<p>“Of course I do, sir.”</p> + +<p>“Why?”</p> + +<p>“Because it is true.”</p> + +<p>“How am I to believe that?”</p> + +<p>“I don’t know, sir. I only know I’ve got to speak the truth. It’s the +person who hears it that’s got to believe it, ain’t it, sir?”</p> + +<p>“You’ve got to prove it.”</p> + +<p>“I don’t think so, sir; I never was told so; I was only told I must +speak the truth; I never was told I must prove what I said.—I’ve been +several times disbelieved, I know.”</p> + +<p>“I should think so indeed!”</p> + +<p>“It was by people who did not know me.”</p> + +<p>“Never by people who did know you?”</p> + +<p>“I think not, sir. I never was by the people at home.”</p> + +<p>“Ah! you could not read what they were thinking!”</p> + +<p>“Were you not believed when you were at home, sir?”</p> + +<p>The magistrate’s doubt of Clare had its source in the fact that, +although now he was more careful to speak the truth than are most +people, it was not his habit when a boy, and he had suffered severely +in consequence. He was annoyed, therefore, at his question, set him +down as a hypocritical, boastful prig, and was seized with a strong +desire to shame him.</p> + +<p>“I remand the prisoner for more evidence. Take the children to the +workhouse,” he said.</p> + +<p>Tommy gave a sudden full-sized howl. He had heard no good of the +workhouse.</p> + +<p>“The baby is mine!” pleaded Clare.</p> + +<p>“Are you the father of it?” said the big policeman.</p> + +<p>“Yes, I think so: I saved her life.—She would have been drowned if I +hadn’t looked for her when I heard the splash!” reasoned Clare, his +face drawn with grief and the struggle to keep from crying.</p> + +<p>“She’s not yours,” said the magistrate. “She belongs to the +parish. Take her away, James.”</p> + +<p>The big policeman came up to take her. Clare would have held her +tight, but was afraid of hurting her. He did draw back from the +outstretched hands, however, while he put a question or two.</p> + +<p>“Please, sir, will the parish be good to her?” he asked.</p> + +<p>“Much better than you.”</p> + +<p>“Will it let me go and see her?” he asked again, with an outbreaking +sob.</p> + +<p>“You can’t go anywhere till you’re out of this,” answered the big +policeman, and, not ungently, took the baby from him.</p> + +<p>“And when will that be, please?” asked Clare, with his empty arms +still held out.</p> + +<p>“That depends on his worship there.”</p> + +<p>“Hold your tongue, James,” said the magistrate. “Take the boy away, +John.”</p> + +<p>“Please, sir, where am I going to?” asked Clare.</p> + +<p>“To prison, till we find out about you.”</p> + +<p>“Please, sir, I didn’t mean to steal her. I didn’t know the parish +wanted her!”</p> + +<p>“Take the boy away, I tell you!” cried the magistrate angrily. “His +tongue goes like the hopper of a mill!”</p> + +<p>James, carrying the baby on one arm, was already pushing Tommy before +him by the neck. Tommy howled, and rubbed his red eyes with what was +left him of cuffs, but did not attempt resistance.</p> + +<p>“Please, don’t let anybody hold her upside down, policeman!” cried +Clare. “She doesn’t like it!—Oh, baby! baby!”</p> + +<p>John tightened his grasp on his arm, and hurried him away in another +direction.</p> + +<p>Where the big policeman issued with his charge, there was Abdiel +hovering about as if his spring were wound up so tight that it +wouldn’t go off. How he came to be at that door, I cannot imagine.</p> + +<p>When he spied Tommy, he rushed at him. Tommy gave him a kick that +rolled him over.</p> + +<p>“Don’t want <i>you</i>, you mangy beast!” he said, and tried to kick him +again.</p> + +<p>Abdiel kept away from him after that, but followed the party to the +workhouse, where also, to his disgust, plainly expressed, he was +refused admittance. He returned to the entrance by which Clare had +vanished from his eyes the night before, and lay down there. I suspect +he had an approximate canine theory of the whole matter. He knew at +least that Clare had gone in with the others at that door; that he had +not come out with them at the other door; that, therefore, in all +probability, he was within that door still.</p> + +<p>The police made inquiry at Mr. Maidstone’s shop. Reasons for his +dismissal were there given involving no accusation: there was little +desire in that quarter to have the matter searched into. There was +therefore nothing to the discredit of the boy, beyond his running to +earth in the neglected house like a wild animal. After three days he +was set at liberty.</p> + +<p>As the big policeman led the way to the door to send him out, Clare +addressed him thus:</p> + +<p>“Please, Mr. James, may I go back to the house for a little while?”</p> + +<p>“Well, you <i>are</i> an innocent!” said James; “—or,” he added, “the +biggest little humbug ever I see!—No, it’s not likely!”</p> + +<p>“I only wanted,” explained Clare, “to set things straight a bit. The +house is cleaner than it was, <i>I</i> know, but it is not in such good +order as when we went into it. I don’t like to leave it worse than we +found it.”</p> + +<p>“Never you heed,” said James, believing him perfectly before he knew +what he was about. “The house don’t belong to nobody, so far as ever I +heerd, an’ the things’ll rot all the same wherever they stand.”</p> + +<p>“But I should like,” persisted Clare.</p> + +<p>“I couldn’t do it off my own hook, an’ his worship would think you +only wanted to steal something. The best thing you can do is to leave +the place at once, an’ go where nobody knows nothing agin you.”</p> + +<p>Thought Clare with himself, “If the house doesn’t belong to anybody, +why wouldn’t they let me stay in it?”</p> + +<p>But the policeman opened the door, and as he was turning to say +good-bye to him, gave him a little shove, and closed it behind him.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXXVIII">Chapter XXXVIII.<br><span class="smcap">The Workhouse.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>He went into the street with a white face and a dazed look—not from +any hardship he had experienced during his confinement, for he had +been in what to him was clover, but because he had lost the baby and +Abdiel, and because his mind had been all the time in perplexity with +regard to the proceedings of justice: he did not and could not see +that he had done anything wrong. Throughout his life it never mattered +much to Clare to be accused of anything wrong, but it did trouble him, +this time at least, to be punished for doing what was right. He took +it very quietly, however.</p> + +<p>Indignation may be a sign of innocence, but it is no necessary +consequence of innocence any more than it is a proof of +righteousness. A man will be fiercely indignant at an accusation that +happens to be false, who did the very thing last week, and is ready to +do it again. Indignation against wrong to another even, is no proof of +a genuine love of fair play. Clare hardly resented anything done to +himself. His inward unconscious purity held him up, and made him look +events in the face with an eye that was single and therefore at once +forgiving and fearless. The man who has no mote in his own eye cannot +be knocked down by the beam in his neighbour’s; while he who is busy +with the mote in his neighbour’s may stumble to destruction over the +beam in his own.</p> + +<p>White and dazed as he came out, the moment he stepped across the +threshold, Clare met the comfort of God waiting for him. His eyes +blinded with the great light, for it was a glorious morning in the +beginning of June, he found himself assailed in unknightly fashion +below the knee: there, to his unspeakable delight, was Abdiel, +clinging to him with his fore-legs, and wagging his tail as if, like +the lizards for terror, he would shake it off for gladness! What a +blessed little pendulum was Abdiel’s tail! It went by that weight of +the clock of the universe called devotion. It was the escapement of +that delight which is of the essence of existence, and which, when God +has set right “our disordered clocks,” will be its very consciousness.</p> + +<p>Clare stood for a moment and looked about him. The needle of his +compass went round and round. It had no north. He could not go back to +the shop; he could not go back to the house; baby was in the +workhouse, but he could not stay there even if they would let him! +Neither could he stop in the town; the policeman said he must go away! +Where was he to go? There was not in the world one place for him +better than another! But they would let him see baby before he +went!—and off he set to find the workhouse.</p> + +<p>Abdiel followed quietly at his heel, for his master walked lost in +thought, and Abdiel was too hungry to make merry without his +notice. Clare, fresh to the world, had been a great reader for one so +young, and could encounter new experience with old knowledge. In his +mind stood a pile of fir-cones, and dried sticks, and old olive wood, +which the merest touch of experience would set in a blaze of practical +conclusion. But the workhouse was so near that his reflections before +he reached it amounted only to this—that there are worse places than +a prison when you have done nothing to deserve being put in it. A +palace may be one of them. You get enough to eat in a prison; in a +palace you do not; you get too much!</p> + +<p>The porter at the workhouse informed him it was not the day for seeing +the inmates; but the tall policeman had given Clare a hint, and he +requested to see the matron. After much demur and much entreaty, the +man went and told the matron. She, knowing the story of the baby, +wanted to see Clare, and was so much pleased with his manners and +looks, that his sad clothes pleaded for and not against him. She took +him at once to the room where the baby was with many more, telling him +he must prove she was his by picking her out. It was not wonderful +that Clare, who knew the faces of animals so well, should know his own +baby the moment he saw her, notwithstanding that she was decently +clothed, and had already improved in appearance. But the nurses +declared they had never before seen a man, not to say a boy, who could +tell one baby from another.</p> + +<p>“Why,” rejoined Clare, “my dog Abdiel could pick out the baby he was +nurse to!”</p> + +<p>“Ah, but he’s a dog!”</p> + +<p>“And I’m a boy!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>He descried her on the lap of an old woman, seeming to him very old, +who was at the head of the nursery-department. Old as she was, +however, she had a keen eye, and a handsome countenance, with a +quantity of white hair. Unlike the rest of the women, though not far +removed from them socially, she knew several languages, so far as to +read and enjoy books in them. Now and then a great woman may be found +in a workhouse, like a first folio of Shakspere on a bookstall, +among—oh, such companions!</p> + +<p>“Let me take her,” said Clare modestly, holding out his hands for the +baby.</p> + +<p>“Are you sure you will not let her drop?”</p> + +<p>“Why, ma’am,” answered Clare, “she’s my own baby! It was I took her +out of the water-butt! I washed and fed her every day!—not that I +could do it so well as you, ma’am!”</p> + +<p>She gave him the baby, and watched him with the eye of a seeress, for +she had a wonderful insight into character, and that is one of the +roots of prophecy.</p> + +<p>“You are a good and true lad,” she said at length, “and a hard success +lies before you. I don’t know what you will come to, but, with those +eyes, and that forehead, and those hands, if you come to anything but +good, you will be terribly to blame.”</p> + +<p>“I will try to be good, ma’am,” said Clare simply. “But I wish I knew +what they put me in prison for!”</p> + +<p>“What, indeed, my lamb!” she returned; and her eyes flashed with +indignation under the cornice of her white hair. “They’ll be put in +prison one day themselves that did it!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, I don’t mind!” said Clare. “I don’t want them to be punished. You +see I’m only waiting!”</p> + +<p>“What are you waiting for, sonny?” asked the old woman.</p> + +<p>“I don’t exactly know—though I know better than what I was put in +prison for. Nobody ever told me anything, but I’m always waiting for +something.”</p> + +<p>“The something will come, child. You will have what you want! Only go +on as you’re doing, and you’ll be a great man one day.”</p> + +<p>“I don’t want to be a great man,” answered Clare; “I’m only waiting +till what is coming does come.”</p> + +<p>The woman cast down her eyes, and seemed lost in thought. Clare +dandled the baby gently in his arms, and talked loving nonsense to +her.</p> + +<p>“Well,” said the old woman, raising at length her eyes, with a look of +reverence in them, to Clare’s, “I can’t help you, and you want no help +of mine. I’ve got no money, but—”</p> + +<p>“I’ve got plenty of money, ma’am,” interrupted Clare. “I’ve got a +whole shilling in my pocket!”</p> + +<p>“Bless the holy innocent!” murmured the woman. “—Well, I can only +promise you this—that as long as I live, the baby sha’n’t forget you; +and I ain’t so old as I look.”</p> + +<p>Here the matron came up, and said he had better be going now; but if +he came back any day after a month, he should see the baby again.</p> + +<p>“Thank you, ma’am,” replied Clare. “Keep her a good baby, please. I +will come for her one day.”</p> + +<p>“Please God I live to see that day!” said the old woman. “I think I +shall.”</p> + +<p>She did live to see it, though I cannot tell that part of the story +now.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XXXIX">Chapter XXXIX.<br><span class="smcap">Away.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>So Clare went once more into the street, where Abdiel was again +watching for him, and stood on the pavement, not knowing which way to +turn. The big policeman had told him that no one there would give him +work after what had happened; and now, therefore, he was only waiting +for a direction to present itself. In a moment it occurred to him +that, having come in at one end of the town, he had better go out at +the other. He followed the suggestion, and Abdiel followed him—his +head hanging and his tail also, for the joy of recovering his master +had used up all the remnant of wag there was in his clock. He had no +more frolic or scamper in him now than when Clare first saw him. How +the poor thing had subsisted during the last few days, it were hard to +tell. It was much that he had escaped death from ill-usage. Meanest of +wretches are the boys or men that turn like grim death upon the +helpless. Except they change their way, helplessness will overtake +them like a thief, and they will look for some one to deliver them and +find none. Traitors to those whom it is their duty to protect, they +will one day find themselves in yet more pitiful plight than ever were +they. But I fear they will not believe it before their fate has them +by the throat.</p> + +<p>Clare saw that the dog was famished. He stopped at a butcher’s and +bought him a scrap of meat for a penny. Then he had elevenpence with +which to begin the world afresh, and was not hungry.</p> + +<p>Out on the highway they went, in a perfect English summer day, with +all the world before them. It was not an oyster for Clare to open with +sword, pen, or <i>sesame</i>; but he might find a place on the outside of +it for all that, and a way over it into a better—one that he <i>could</i> +open and get at the heart of. The sun shone as on the day of the +earthquake—deep in Clare’s dimmest memorial cavern;—shone as if he +knew, come what might, that all was well; that if he shone his heart +out and went dark, nothing would go wrong; while, for the present, +everything depended on his shining his glorious best.</p> + +<p>“Come along, Abdiel,” said Clare; “we’re going to see what comes +next. At the worst, you know what hunger is, doggie, and that a good +deal of it can be borne pretty well—though I’m not fond of it any +more than you, doggie! We’ll not beg till we’re downright forced, and +we won’t steal. When that’s the next thing, we’ll just sit down, wag +our tails, and die.—There!”</p> + +<p>He gave him the last piece of his meat, and they trudged on for some +time without speaking.</p> + +<p>The sun was very hot, for it was past noon an hour or two, when they +came to a public-house, with a pump before it, and a trough. Clare +grew very thirsty when he saw the pump, and imagined the rush of a +thick sparkling curve from its spout. But its handle was locked with a +chain, to keep men and women from having water instead of beer. He +went with longing to the trough, but the water in it was so unclean +that, thirsty as he was, he could not look on it even as a last +resource. He walked into the house.</p> + +<figure class="figcenter illowp44" id="004" style="max-width: 37.1875em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/004.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">Clare and Abdiel at the locked pump.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>“Please, ma’am,” he said to the woman at the bar, “would you allow me +to pump myself a little water to drink?”</p> + +<p>“You think I’ve got nothing to do but serve tramps with water!” she +answered, throwing back her head till her nostrils were at right +angles with the horizon.</p> + +<p>“I’m not a tramp, ma’am,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“Show me your money, then, for a pot of beer, like other honest folk.”</p> + +<p>“I’m afraid I told you wrong, ma’am,” returned Clare. “I’m afraid I +<i>am</i> a tramp after all; only <i>I</i>’m looking for work, and most tramps +ain’t, I fancy.”</p> + +<p>“They all <i>say</i> they are,” answered the woman. “That’s your story, and +that’s theirs!”</p> + +<p>“I’ve got elevenpence, ma’am; and could, I dare say, buy a pot of +beer, though I don’t know the price of one; but I don’t see where I’m +going to get any more money, and what we have must serve Abdiel and me +till we do.”</p> + +<p>“What right have <i>you</i> to a dog, when you ain’t fit to pay your penny +for a half-pint o’ beer?”</p> + +<p>“Don’t be hard on the young ’un, mis’ess; he don’t look a bad sort!” +said a man who stood by with a pewter pot in his hand.</p> + +<p>Clare wondered why he had his cord-trousers pulled up a few inches and +tied under his knees with a string, which made little bags of them +there. He had to think for a mile after they left the public-house +before he discovered that it was to keep them from tightening on his +knees when he stooped, and so incommoding him at his work.</p> + +<p>“Thank you, sir,” he said. “I’m not a bad sort. I didn’t know it was +any harm to ask for water. It ain’t begging, is it, sir?”</p> + +<p>“Not as I knows on,” replied the man. “Here, take the lot!”</p> + +<p>He offered Clare his nearly emptied pewter.</p> + +<p>“No, thank you, sir,” answered Clare. “I am thirsty—but not so thirsty +as to take your drink from you. I can get on to the next pump. Perhaps +that won’t be chained up like a bull!”</p> + +<p>“Here, mis’ess!” cried the man. “This is a mate as knows a neighbour +when he sees him. I’ll stand him a half-pint. There’s yer money!”</p> + +<p>Without a word the woman flung the man’s penny in the till, and drew +Clare a half-pint of porter. Clare took it eagerly, turned to the man, +said, “I thank you, sir, and wish your good health,” and drained the +pewter mug. He had never before tasted beer, or indeed any drink +stronger than tea, and he did not like it. But he thanked his +benefactor again, and went back to the trough.</p> + +<p>“Dogs don’t drink beer,” he said to himself. “They know better!” and +lifting Abdiel he held him over the trough. Abdiel was not so +fastidious as his master, and lapped eagerly. Then they pursued their +uncertain way.</p> + +<p>Ready to do anything, he thought the shabbiness of his clothes would +be a greater bar to indoor than to outdoor work, and applied therefore +at every farm they came to. But he did not look so able as he was, and +boys were not much wanted. He never pitied himself, and never +entreated: to beg for work was beggary, and to beggary he would not +descend until driven by approaching death. But now and then some +tender-hearted woman, oftener one of ripe years, struck with his +look—its endurance, perhaps, or its weariness mingled with +hope—would perceive the necessity of the boy, and offer him the food +he did not ask—nor like him the less that, never doubting what came +to one was for both, he gave the first share of it to Abdiel.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XL">Chapter XL.<br><span class="smcap">Maly.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Travelling on in vague hope, meeting with kindness enough to keep him +alive, but getting no employment, sleeping in what shelter he could +find, and never missing the shelter he could not find, for the weather +was exceptionally warm for the warm season, he came one day to a +village where the strangest and hardest experience he ever encountered +awaited him. What part of the country he was in, or what was the name +of the village, he did not know. He seldom asked a question, seldom +uttered word beyond a polite greeting, but kept trudging on and on, as +if the goal of his expectation were ever drawing nigher. He felt no +curiosity as to the names of the places he passed through. Why should +the names of towns and villages strung on a road to nowhere in +particular, interest him? He did, however, long afterward, come to +know the name of this village, and its topographical relations: the +place itself was branded on his brain.</p> + +<p>He entered it in the glow of a hot noon, and had walked nearly through +it without meeting any one, for it was the dinner-hour, and savoury +odours filled the air, when a little girl came from a neat house, and +ran farther down the street. He was very tired, very dusty, had eaten +nothing that day, had begun to despair of work, and was wishing +himself clear of the houses that he might throw himself down. But +something in the look of the child made him quicken his weary step as +he followed her. He overtook her, passed her, and saw her face. +Heavens! it was Maly, grown wonderfully bigger! He turned and caught +her up in his arms. She gave a screech of terror, and he set her down +in keenest dismay. Finding that he was not going to run away with her, +she did not run farther from him than to safe parleying distance.</p> + +<p>“You bad boy!” she cried; “you’re not to touch me! I will tell mamma!”</p> + +<p>“Why, Maly! don’t you know me?”</p> + +<p>“No, I don’t. You are a dirty boy!”</p> + +<p>“But, Maly!—”</p> + +<p>“My name is not Maly; it’s Mary; and I don’t know you.”</p> + +<p>“Have you forgotten Clare, Maly?—Clare that used to carry you about +all day long?”</p> + +<p>“Yes; I have forgotten you. You’re a dirty, ragged beggar-boy! You’re +a bad boy! Boys with holes in their clothes are bad boys.—Nursie told +me so, and she knows everything! She told me herself she knew +everything!”</p> + +<p>She gave another though milder scream: involuntarily, Clare had taken +a step toward her, with his hand in his pocket, searching, as in the +old days when she cried, for something to give her. But, alas, his +pockets were now as empty as his stomach! there was <i>nothing</i> in +them—not even a crumb saved from a scanty meal! While he was yet +searching, the little child, his heart’s love—if indeed it was +she—stooped, gathered a handful of dust, and threw it at him. The big +boy burst into tears. The child mocked him for a minute, and when +Clare looked up again, drying his eyes with a rag, she was gone.</p> + +<p>He felt no resentment; love, old memories, his strange gentleness, and +pity for Maly and Maly’s mother, saved him from it. The child was big +and plump and rosy, but oh, how fallen from his little Maly! And, her +child grown such, the mother was poor indeed, though up in the dome of +the angels! If she did not know the change in her, it was the worse, +for she could not help! Clare, like most of my readers, had not yet +learned to trust God for everything. But he was true to +Maly. Miserable over her backsliding, he said to himself that evil +counsellors were more to blame than she.</p> + +<p>“Did she know me at all?” he pondered; “or has she forgot me +altogether?”</p> + +<p>He began to doubt whether the girl was really Maly, or one very like +her. About half an hour after, he met a poor woman with a bundle on +her bowed back, who gave him a piece of bread. When he had eaten that, +he began to doubt whether he had met any little girl. He remembered +that he had often come to himself, as he wandered along the road, to +find he had been lost in fancies of old scenes or imaginary new ones; +waked up, he did not at once realize himself a poor lad on the tramp +for work he could not find: his conceptions were for a time stronger +than the things around him. He was thereupon comforted with the hope +that he had not in reality seen Maly, but had imagined the whole +affair. How was it possible, though, that he should imagine such +horrible things of his little sister? On the other hand, was it not +more possible for a fainting brain to imagine such a misery, than for +the live child to behave in such a fashion? Every day for many days he +tormented himself with like reasonings; but by degrees the occurrence, +whether fancy or fact, receded, and he grew more conscious of +tramping, tramping along. He grew also more hopeless of getting work, +but not more doubtful that everything was right. For he knew of +nothing he had done to bring these things upon him.</p> + +<p>His quiet content never left him. At the worst pinch of hunger and +cold, he never fell into despair. I do not know what merit he had in +this, for he was constituted more hopeful and placid than I ever knew +another. What he had merit in was, that not for a hungry boy’s most +powerful temptation, something to eat, would he even imagine himself +doing what must not be done. He would not lead himself into +temptation. Thus he pleased the Power—let me rather say, ten times +more truly—the Father from whom he came.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XLI">Chapter XLI.<br><span class="smcap">The Caravans.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Within a fortnight or so after the police had dismissed him, blowing +him loose on the world like a dandelion-seed in the wind, Clare had an +adventure which not only gave him pleasure, but led to work and food +and interest in life.</p> + +<p>Passing one day from a cross-country road into the highway, he came +straight on the flank of a travelling menagerie. It was one of some +size, and Clare saw at a glance that its horses were in fair +condition. The front part of the little procession had already gone +by, and an elephant was passing at the moment with a caravan—of +feline creatures, as Clare afterwards learned, behind him. He drew it +with absolute ease, but his head seemed to be dragged earthward by the +weight of his trunk, as he plodded wearily along. A world of delight +woke in the heart of the boy. He had read much about strange beasts, +but had never seen one. His impulse was to run straight to the +elephant, and tell him he loved him. For he was a live beast, and +Clare loved every creature, common or strange, wild or tame, ordinary +or wonderful. But prudent thought followed, and he saw it better to +hover around, in the hope of a chance of being useful. Oh, the +treasures of wonder and knowledge on the other side of those thin +walls of wood, so slowly drawn along the dusty highway! If but for a +moment he might gaze on their living marvels! He had no money, but +things came to him without money—not so plentifully as he could +sometimes wish—but they came, and so might this! Employment among +those animals would be well worth the long hungry waiting! This might +be the very work he had been looking for without knowing it! It was +for this, perhaps, he had been kept so long waiting—till the caravans +should come along the road, and he be at the corner as they passed! He +did not know how often a man may think thus and see it come to +nothing—because there is better yet beyond, for which more waiting is +wanted.</p> + +<p>At the end of the procession came a bear, shuffling along +uncomfortably. It went to Clare’s heart to see how far from +comfortable the poor beast appeared. “What a life it would be,” he +thought, “to have all the creatures in all those caravans to make +happy! That would be a life worth living!”</p> + +<p>It was a worthy ambition—infinitely higher than that of boys who want +to do something great, or clever, or strong. As to those who want to +be rich—for their ambition I have an utter contempt. How gladly would +I drive that meanness out of any boy’s heart! To fall in with the work +of the glad creator, and help him in it—that is the only ambition +worth having. It may not look a grand thing to do it in a caravan, but +it takes the mind of Christ to do it anywhere.</p> + +<p>Behind the bear, closing the procession, came a stoutish, +good-tempered-looking man, in a small spring-cart, drawn by a small +pony: he was the earthly owner of that caged life, with all its +gathered discomforts. Clare lifted his cap as he passed him—a +politeness of which the man took no notice, because the boy was +ragged. The moment he was past, Clare fell in behind as one of the +procession. He was prudent enough, however, not to go so near as to +look intrusive.</p> + +<p>When he had followed thus for a mile or two, he saw, by signs patent +to every wanderer, that they were coming near a town. Before reaching +it, however, they arrived at a spot where the hedges receded from the +road, leaving a little green sward on the sides of it, and there the +long line came to a halt.</p> + +<p>The menagerie had, the day before, been exhibited at a fair, and was +now on its way to another, to be held the next day in the town they +were approaching: they had made the halt in order to prepare their +entrance. To let a part of their treasure be seen, was the best way to +rouse desire after what was yet hidden: they were going, therefore, to +take out an animal or two more to walk in parade. Clare sat down at a +little distance, and wondered what was coming next.</p> + +<p>Experience of tramps had made the men suspicious, and it may be they +disliked having their proceedings watched by anybody; but, happily for +Clare, it was the master himself who came up to him, not without +something of menace in his bearing. The boy was never afraid, and hope +started up full grown as the man approached. He rose and took off his +cap—a very ready action with Clare, which sprung from pure +politeness, and from nothing either selfish or cringing. But the man +put his own interpretation on the civility.</p> + +<p>“What are you hanging about here for?” he said rudely.</p> + +<p>Now Clare had a perfect right to answer, had he so pleased, that he +was on the king’s highway, where no one had a right to interfere with +him. But he had the habit—he could not help it; it was natural to +him—of thinking first of the other party’s side of a question—a rare +gift, which served him better than he knew. For the other may be in +the right, and it is an ugly thing to interfere with any man’s right; +while a man’s own rights are never so much good to him as when he +waives them.</p> + +<p>“I beg your pardon, sir,” he said; “I did not understand you wished to +be alone. I never thought you would mind me. Will it be far enough if +I go just out of sight, for I am very tired? It is pleasant, besides, +to know there are friends near!”</p> + +<p>The man recognized in Clare the modes and speech of a gentleman; and +having, in the course of his wandering life, seen and known a good +many strange things, he suspected under the rags a history. But he was +not interested enough to stop and inquire into it.</p> + +<p>“Never mind,” he said, in altered tone; “I see you’re after no +mischief!” and with that walked away, leaving Clare to do as he +pleased.</p> + +<p>A few minutes more went by. Clare sat hungry and sleepy on the grass +by the roadside. Before he knew, he was on his feet, startled by a +terrible noise. The lion had opened his great jaws, and his brown +leathery sides, working like a pair of bellows, had sent from his +throat a huge blast, half roar, half howl. When Clare came to himself +he knew, though he had never heard it before, that the fearful sound +was the voice of the lion. He did not know that all it meant was, that +his majesty had thought of his dinner. It was not indeed much more +than an audible gape. He stood for a moment, not at all terrified, but +half expecting to see a huge yellow animal burst out of one of the +caravans—he could not guess which: the roar was much too loud to +indicate one rather than another. He sat down again, but was not any +longer inclined to sleep. For a time, however, no second roar came +from the ribs of the captive monarch.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XLII">Chapter XLII.<br><span class="smcap">Nimrod.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>That there had been a fair not far off will partly account for what +follows. As Clare sat resting, which was all he could do, with sleep +fled and food nowhere, a roar of a different kind invaded his ears. It +came along the road this time, not from the caravans. He looked, and +spied what would have brought the heart into the throat of many a +grown man. Away on the road, in the direction whence the menagerie had +come, he saw a cloud of dust and a confused struggle, presently +resolved into two men, each at the end of a rope, and an animal +between them attached to the ropes by a ring in his nose. It was a +bull, in terrible excitement, bounding this way and that, dragging and +driving the men—doing his best in fact to break away, now from the +one of them, now from the other, and now from both at once. It must +have tortured him to pull those strong men by the cartilage of his +nose, but he was in too great a rage to feel it much. Every other +moment his hoofs would be higher than his head, and again hoofs and +head and horns would be scraping the ground in a fruitless rush to +send one of his tormentors into space beyond the ken of bulls. With +swift divergence, like a scenting hound, he twisted and shot his huge +body. The question between men and bull seemed one of endurance.</p> + +<p>The pale-faced boy, though full of interest in the strife, yet having +had no food that day, was not in sufficient spirits to run and meet +the animal whirlwind, so as to watch closer its chances; but the +struggle came at length near enough for him to follow almost every +detail of it: he could see the bloody foam drip from the poor beast’s +nostrils. When about fifty yards away, the bull, by a sudden twist, +wrenched the rope from the hands of one of the men. He fell on his +back. The other dropped his rope and fled. The bull came scouring down +the highway.</p> + +<p>A second roar, as of muffled thunder, issued from the leathery flanks +of the lion. The bull made a sudden stop, scoring up the ground with +his hoofs. It seemed as if in full career he started back. Then down +went his head, and like a black flash, its accompanying thunder a +bellow of defiant contempt and wrath, he charged one of the +caravans. He had taken the hungry lion’s roar for a challenge to +combat. It was nothing to the bull that the voice was that of an +unknown monster; he was ready for whatever the monster might prove.</p> + +<p>The men busy about the caravans and wagons, caught sight of him +coming, and in the first moment of terror at a beast to which they +were not accustomed, bolted for refuge behind or upon them: they would +sooner have encountered their tiger broke loose. The same moment, with +astounding shock, the head of the bull went crack against the near +hind-wheel of the caravan in whose shafts stood the elephant, +patiently waiting orders. The bull had not caught sight of the +elephant, or he would doubtless have “gone for” him, not the +caravan. His ear, finer than Clare’s, must have distinguished whence +the roar proceeded: in that caravan, sure enough, was the lion, with +the rest of the great cats. He answered the blow of the bull’s head +with a roar thunderously different from his late sleepy leonine +sigh. It roused every creature in the menagerie. From the greatest to +the smallest each took up its cry. Out burst a tornado of terrific +sound, filling with horror the quiet noontide. The roaring and yelling +of lion, tiger, and leopard, the laughter of hyena, the howling of +jackal, and the snarling of bear, mingled in hideous dissonance with +the cries of monkeys and parrots; while certain strange gurgles made +Clare’s heart, lover of animals though he was, quiver, and his blood +creep. The same instant, however, he woke to the sense that he might +do something: he ran to the caravans.</p> + +<p>By this time the men, master and all, fully roused to the far worse +that might follow the attack of the bull, had caught up what weapons +were at hand, and rushed to repel the animal. For more than one or two +of them it might have proved a fatal encounter, but that the enraged +beast had entangled his horns in the spokes and rim of the wheel. In +terror of what might be approaching him from behind, he was struggling +wildly to extricate them. Peril upon peril! What if in the contortions +of his mighty muscles he pulled off the wheel, and the carriage +toppled over, every cage in it so twisted and wrenched that the +bearings of its iron bars gave way! The results were too terrible to +ponder! This way and that, and every way at once, he was writhing and +pushing and prising and dragging. The elephant turned the shafts +slowly round to see what was the matter behind. If the bull and the +elephant yoked to the caravan came to loggerheads, ruin was +inevitable. The master thought whether he had not better loose the +elephant while the bull was yet entangled by the horns. With one blow +of his trunk he would break the ruffian’s back and end the affray! It +were good even, if one knew how, to loose the wicked-looking horns: +the brute’s struggles to free them were more dangerous far than could +be the horns themselves!</p> + +<p>While he hesitated, Clare came running up, with Abdiel at his heels +ready as any hornet to fly at bull or elephant, let his master only +speak the word. But the moment Clare saw how the bull’s horns were +mixed up with the spokes and fellies of the wheel, a glad suspicion +flashed across him: that was old Nimrod’s way! could it be Nimrod +himself? If it were, the trouble was as good as over! The suspicion +became a certainty the instant it woke. But never could Clare +altogether forgive himself for not at first sight recognizing his old +friend. I believe myself that hunger was to blame, and not Clare.</p> + +<p>The men stood about the animal, uncertain what to do, as he struggled +with his horns, and heaved and tore at the wheel to get them out of +it, the roars and howls and inarticulate curses going on all the +time. The elephant must have been tired, to stand so and do nothing! +For a moment Clare could not get near enough. He was afraid to call +him while the bull could not see him: Nimrod might but struggle the +more, in order to get to him!</p> + +<p>Up rushed a fellow, white with rage and running, bang into the middle +of the spectators, and shook the knot of them asunder. It was one of +the two men from whom Nimrod had broken. He had a pitchfork in his +hands which he proceeded to level. Clare flung his weight against him, +threw up his fork, shoved him aside, and got close to the maddened +animal. It was his past come again! How often had he not interfered to +protect Nimrod—and his would-be masters also! With instinctive, +unconscious authority, he held up his hand to the little crowd.</p> + +<p>“Leave him alone,” he cried. “I know him; I can manage him! Please do +not interfere. He is an old friend of mine.”</p> + +<p>They saw that the bull was already still: he had recognized the boy’s +voice! They kept his furious attendant back, and looked on in anxious +hope while Clare went up to the animal.</p> + +<p>“Nimrod!” he whispered, laying a hand on one of the creature’s horns, +and his cheek against his neck.</p> + +<p>Nimrod stood like a bull in bronze.</p> + +<p>“I’m going to get your horns out, Nimrod,” murmured Clare, and laid +hold of the other with a firm grasp. “You must let me do as I like, +you know, Nimrod!”</p> + +<p>His voice evidently soothed the bull.</p> + +<p>By the horns Clare turned his head now one way, now another, Nimrod +not once resisting push or pull. In a moment more he would have them +clear, for one of them was already free. Holding on to the latter, +Clare turned to the bystanders.</p> + +<p>“You mustn’t touch him,” he said, “or I won’t answer for him. And you +mustn’t let either of those men there”—for the second of Nimrod’s +attendants had by this time come up—“interfere with him or me. They +let him go because they couldn’t manage him. He can’t bear them; and +if he were to break loose from them again, it might be quite another +affair! Then he might distrust me!”</p> + +<p>The menagerie men turned, and looking saw that the man with the +pitchfork had revenge in his heart. They gave him to understand that +he must mind what he was about, or it would be the worse for him. The +man scowled and said nothing.</p> + +<p>Clare gently released the other horn, but kept his hold of the first, +moving the creature’s head by it, this way and that. A moment more and +he turned his face to the company, which had scattered a little. When +the inflamed eyes of Nimrod came into view, they scattered wider. +Clare still made the bull feel his hand on his horn, and kept speaking +to him gently and lovingly. Nimrod eyed his enemies, for such plainly +he counted them, as if he wished he were a lion that he might eat as +well as kill them. At the same time he seemed to regard them with +triumph, saying in his big heart, “Ha! ha! you did not know what a +friend I had! Here he is, come in the nick of time! I thought he +would!” Clare proceeded to untie the ropes from the ring in his +nose. The man with the pitchfork interfered.</p> + +<figure class="figcenter illowp45" id="005" style="max-width: 37.75em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/005.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">Clare proceeds to untie the ropes from the ring in the +bull’s nose.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>“That wonnot do!” he said, and laid his hand on Clare’s arm. “Would +you send him ramping over the country, and never a hold to have on +him?”</p> + +<p>“It wasn’t much good when you had a hold on him—was it now?” returned +the boy. “Where do you want to take him?”</p> + +<p>“That’s my business,” answered the man sulkily.</p> + +<p>“I fancy you’ll find it’s mine!” returned Clare. “But there he is! +Take him.”</p> + +<p>The man hesitated.</p> + +<p>“Then leave me to manage him,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>A murmur of approbation arose. The caravan people felt he knew what he +was saying. They believed he had power with the bull.</p> + +<p>While yet he was untying the first of the ropes from the animal’s +bleeding nostrils, Clare’s fingers all at once refused further +obedience, his eyes grew dim, and he fell senseless at the bull’s +feet.</p> + +<p>“Don’t tell Nimrod!” he murmured as he fell.</p> + +<p>“Oh, that explains it!” cried the man with the pitchfork to his +mate. “He knows the cursed brute!” For Clare had hitherto spoken his +name to the bull as if it were a secret between them.</p> + +<p>Neither had the sense to perceive that the explanation lay in the +bull’s knowing Clare, not in Clare’s knowing the bull. They made haste +to lay hold of the ropes. Nimrod stood motionless, looking down on his +friend, now and then snuffing at the pale face, which the +thorough-bred mongrel, Abdiel, kept licking continuously. Noses of +bull and dog met without offence on the loved human countenance. But +had the men let the bull feel the ropes, that moment he would have +been raging like a demon.</p> + +<p>The men of the caravan, admiring both Clare’s influence over the +animal and his management of him, grateful also for what he had done +for them, hastened to his help. When they had got him to take a little +brandy, he sat up with a wan smile, but presently fell sideways on his +elbow, and so to the ground again.</p> + +<p>“It’s nothing,” he murmured; “it’s only I’m rather hungry.”</p> + +<p>“Poor boy!” said a woman, who had followed her brandy from the +house-caravan, afraid it might disappear in occult directions, “when +did you have your last feed?”</p> + +<p>She stood looking down on the white face, almost between the fore-feet +of the bull.</p> + +<p>“I had a piece of bread yesterday afternoon, ma’am,” faltered Clare, +trying to look up at her.</p> + +<p>“Bless my soul!” she cried, “who’s been a murderin’ of you, child?”</p> + +<p>She thought he was in company with the two men; and they had been +ill-treating him.</p> + +<p>“I can’t get any work, ma’am, so I don’t want much to eat. Now I think +of it, I believe it was the gladness of seeing an old friend again, +and not the hunger, that made me feel so queer all at once.”</p> + +<p>“Where’s your friend?” she asked, looking round the assembly.</p> + +<p>“There he is!” answered Clare, putting up his hand, and stroking the +big nose that was right over his face.</p> + +<p>“Couldn’t you rise now?” said the woman, after a moment’s silent +regard of him.</p> + +<p>“I’ll try, ma’am; I don’t feel quite sure.”</p> + +<p>“I want you to come into the house, and have a good square meal.”</p> + +<p>“If you would be so kind, ma’am, as let me have a bit of bread here! +Nimrod would not like me to leave him. He loves me, ma’am, and if I +went away, he might be troublesome. Those men will never do anything +with him: he doesn’t like them! They’ve been rough to him, I don’t +doubt. Not that I wonder at that, for he is a terrible beast to most +people. They used to say he never was good with anybody but me. I +suppose he knew I cared for him!”</p> + +<p>His eyes closed again. The woman made haste to get him something. In a +few minutes she returned with a basin of broth. He took it eagerly, +but with a look of gratitude that went to her heart. Before he tasted +it, however, he set it on the ground, broke in half the great piece of +bread she had brought with it, and gave the larger part to his +dog. Then he ate the other with his broth, and felt better than for +many a day. Some of the men said he could not be very hungry to give a +cur like that so much of his dinner; but the evil thought did not +enter the mind of the woman.</p> + +<p>“You’d better be taking your beast away,” said the woman, who by this +time understood the affair, to the two men.</p> + +<p>They were silent, evidently disinclined for such another tussle.</p> + +<p>“You’d better be going,” she said again. “If anything should happen +with that animal of yours, and one of ours was to get loose, the devil +would be to pay, and who’d do it?”</p> + +<p>“They’d better wait for me, ma’am,” said Clare, rising. “I’m just +ready!—They won’t tell me where they want to take him, but it’s all +one, so long as I’m with him. He’s my friend!—Ain’t you, Nimrod? +We’ll go together—won’t we, Nimrod?”</p> + +<p>While he spoke, he undid the ropes from the ring in the bull’s +nose. Gathering them up, he handed them politely to one of the men, +and the next moment sprang upon the bull’s back, just behind his +shoulders, and leaning forward, stroked his horns and neck.</p> + +<p>“Give me up the dog, please,” he said.</p> + +<p>The owner of the menagerie himself did as Clare requested. All stood +and stared, half expecting to see him flung from the creature’s back, +and trampled under his hoofs. Even Nimrod, however, would not easily +have unseated Clare, who could ride anything he had ever tried, and +had tried everything strong enough to carry him, from a pig +upward. But Nimrod was far from wishing to unseat his friend, who with +hands and legs began to send him toward the road.</p> + +<p>“Are you going that way?” he asked, pointing. The men answered him +with a nod, sulky still.</p> + +<p>“Don’t go with those men,” said the woman, coming up to the side of +the bull, and speaking in a low voice. “I don’t like the look of +them.”</p> + +<p>“Nimrod will be on my side, ma’am,” answered Clare. “They would never +have got him home without me. They don’t understand their +fellow-creatures.”</p> + +<p>“I’m afraid you understand your fellow-creatures, as you call them, +better than you do your own kind!”</p> + +<p>“I think they are my own kind, ma’am. That is how they know me, and do +what I want them to do.”</p> + +<p>“Stay with us,” said the woman coaxingly, still speaking low. “You’ll +have plenty of your fellow-creatures about you then!”</p> + +<p>“Thank you, ma’am, a thousand times!” answered Clare, his face +beaming; “but I couldn’t leave poor Nimrod to do those men a mischief, +and be killed for it!”</p> + +<p>“You’d have plenty to eat and drink, and som’at for your pocket!” +persisted the woman.</p> + +<p>“I know I should have everything I wanted!” answered Clare, “and I’m +very thankful to you, ma’am. But you see there’s always something, +somehow, that’s got to be done before the other thing!”</p> + +<p>Here the master came up. He had himself been thinking the boy would be +a great acquisition, and guessed what his wife was about; but he was +afraid she might promise too much for services that ought to be had +cheap. Few scruple to take advantage of the misfortune of another to +get his service cheap. It is the economy of hell.</p> + +<p>“I sha’n’t feel safe till that bull of yours is a mile off!” he said.</p> + +<p>“Come along, Nimrod!” answered Clare, always ready with the responsive +deed.</p> + +<p>Away went Nimrod, gentle as a lamb.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XLIII">Chapter XLIII.<br><span class="smcap">Across Country.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>The two men came after at their ease. No sooner was Nimrod on the +road, however, than he began to quicken his pace. He quickened it +fast, and within a minute or so was trotting swiftly along. The men +ran panting and shouting behind. The more they shouted, the faster +Nimrod went. Ere long he was out of their sight, though Clare could +hear them cursing and calling for a time.</p> + +<p>He had endeavoured to stop Nimrod, but the bull seemed to have made up +his mind that he had obeyed enough for one day. He did not heed a word +Clare said to him, but kept on and on at a swinging trot. Clare would +have jumped off had he been sure the proceeding would stop him; but, +now that he would not obey him, he feared lest, in doing so, he might +let him loose on the country, when there was no saying what mischief +he might not work. On the other hand, he felt sure that he could +restrain him from violence, though he might not prevent his +frolicking. He must therefore keep his seat.</p> + +<p>For a few miles Nimrod was content with the highway, now trotting +beautifully, now breaking into a canter. But all at once he turned at +right angles in the middle of the road, cleared the skirting fence +like a hunter, and took a bee-line across the fields. Compelled +sometimes to abandon it, he showed great judgment in choosing the +place at which to get out of the enclosure, or cross the natural +obstruction. On and on he went, over hedge after hedge, through field +after field, until Clare began to wonder where all the people in the +world had got to. Then a strange feeling gradually came over +him. Surely at some time or other he had seen the meadow he was +crossing! Was he asleep, and dreaming the jolly ride he was having on +Nimrod’s back? What a strong creature Nimrod was! Would he never be +tired? How oddly he felt! Were his senses going from him? It was like +the strangest mixture of a bad dream and a good!</p> + +<p>There seemed at length no further room for doubt or +mistake. Everything was in its place! It was plain why Nimrod was so +obstinate! The dear old fellow was carrying him back to where they had +been together so many happy days! They were nigh Mr. Goodenough’s +farm, and making straight for it! How strange it was! he had felt +himself a measureless distance from it! But in his wandering he had +taken many turns he did not heed, and Nimrod had come the shortest +way. Delight filled his heart at the thought of seeing once more the +places where his father and mother seemed yet to live. But instantly +came the thought of Maly, and drowned the other thought in +bitterness. Then he felt how worthless place is, when those who made +it dear are gone. Father and mother are home—not the house we were +born in!</p> + +<p>They were soon upon the farm where once he had abundance of labour, +abundance to eat, and abundance of lowly friendship. Nimrod was making +for his old stable. He was weary now, and breathing heavily, though +not at all spent. Was he dreaming of a golden age, in which Clare +should be ever at his beck and call?</p> + +<p>Clare had little inclination to encounter any of the people of the +farm. He would indeed have been glad, from a little way off, to get a +sight of his once friend and master, the farmer himself; and very +gladly would he have gone into the stable in the hope of a greeting +from old Jonathan; but he would not willingly meet “the mistress!” +Nimrod should take him to his old stall; there he would tie him up, +and flee from the place! The evening was now come, and in the dusk he +would escape unseen.</p> + +<p>When they reached Nimrod’s door, they found it closed; and Clare, +stiff enough by this time, slipped off to open it. Nimrod began to paw +the stones, and blow angry puffs from his wounded nose. When Clare got +the door open, he saw, to his confusion, a vague dark bulk, another +bull, in Nimrod’s stall! The roar that simultaneously burst from each +was ferocious, and down went Nimrod’s head to charge. It was a +terrible moment for Clare: the new bull was fast by the head, and, +unable to turn it to his adversary, would be gored to death almost in +a moment! He could not let Nimrod be guilty of such unfairness! And +the mistress would think he had brought him back for the very purpose! +He all but jumped on the horns of his friend, making him yield just +ground enough for the shutting of the door. He knew well, however, +that not three such doors in one would keep Nimrod from an enemy. With +his back to it he stood facing him and talking to him, and all the +while they heard the bull inside struggling to get free. He stood +between two horned rages, only a chain and a plank betwixt him and the +one at his back, with which he had no influence. A coward would have +escaped, and left the two bullies to settle between them which had the +better right to the stall—not without blood, almost as certainly not +without loss of life, perhaps human as well as bovine. But Clare was +made of other stuff.</p> + +<p>Before he could get Nimrod away, the bellowing brought out the +farmer. All his men had gone to the village; only himself and his wife +were at home.</p> + +<p>“What’s got the brute?” he cried on the threshold, but instantly began +to run, for he saw through the gathering darkness a darker shape he +knew, roaring and pawing at the door of his old quarters, and a boy +standing between him and it, with marvellous courage in mortal danger. +He understood at once that Nimrod had broken loose and come back. But +when he came near enough to recognize Clare, astonishment, and +something more sacred than astonishment, held him dumb. Ever since the +unjust blow that sent the boy from him, his heart had been aware of a +little hollow of remorse in it. Now all his former relations with him +while his adoptive father yet lived, came back upon him. He remembered +him dressed like the little gentleman he always was—and there he +stood, the same gentle fearless creature, in absolute rags! If his +wife saw him! The farmer had no fear of Nimrod in his worst rages, but +he feared his wife in her gentlest moods. Happily for both, a critical +moment in the cooking of the supper had arrived.</p> + +<p>“Clare!” he stammered.</p> + +<p>“Yes, sir,” returned Clare, and laid hold of Nimrod’s horn. The animal +yielded, and turned away with him. The farmer came nearer, and put his +arm round the boy’s neck. The boy rubbed his cheek against the arm.</p> + +<p>“I’m sorry I struck you, Clare!” faltered the big man.</p> + +<p>“Oh, never mind, sir! That was long ago!” answered the boy.</p> + +<p>“Tell me how you’ve been getting on.”</p> + +<p>“Pretty well, sir! But I want to tell you first how it is I’m here +with Nimrod. Only it would be better to put him somewhere before I +begin.”</p> + +<p>“It would,” agreed the farmer; and between them, with the enticements +of a pail of water and some fresh-cut grass, they got him into a shed, +where they hoped he would forget the proximity of the usurper, and, +with the soothing help of his supper, go to sleep.</p> + +<p>Then Clare told his story. Mr. Goodenough afterward asseverated that, +if he had not known him for a boy that would not lie, he would not +have believed the half of it.</p> + +<p>“Come, Abdiel!” said Clare, the moment he ended—and would have +started at once.</p> + +<p>“Won’t you have something after your long ride?” said the farmer.</p> + +<p>Clare looked down at his clothes, and laughed. The farmer knew what he +meant, and did not ask him into the house.</p> + +<p>“When had you anything to eat?” he inquired.</p> + +<p>“I shall do very well till to-morrow,” answered Clare.</p> + +<p>“Then if you will go, I’m glad of the opportunity of paying you the +wages I owed you,” said the farmer, putting his hand in his pocket.</p> + +<p>“You gave me my food! That was all I was worth!” protested Clare.</p> + +<p>“You were worth more than that! I knew the difference when I had +another boy in your place! I wish I had you again!—But it wouldn’t +do, you know! it wouldn’t do!” he added hastily.</p> + +<p>With that he succeeded in pulling a sovereign from the depth of a +trowser-pocket, and held it out to Clare. It was neither large wages +nor a greatly generous gift, but it seemed to the boy wealth +enormous. He could not help holding out his hand, but he was ashamed +to open it. What the giver regarded as a debt, the receiver regarded +as a gift. He stood with his hand out but clenched. There was a combat +inside him.</p> + +<p>“It’s too much!” he protested, looking at the sovereign almost with +fear. “I never had so much money in my life!”</p> + +<p>“You earned it well,” said the farmer magnanimously.</p> + +<p>The moral cramp forsook his hand. He took the money with a hearty +“Thank you, sir.” As he put it in his pocket, he felt its corners +carefully, lest there should be a hole. But his pockets had not had +half the wear of the clothes they inhabited.</p> + +<p>“Where are you going?” asked the farmer.</p> + +<p>Clare mentioned the small town in whose neighbourhood he had left the +caravans, and said he thought the people of the menagerie would like +him to help them with the beasts. The farmer shook his head.</p> + +<p>“It’s not a respectable occupation!” he remarked.</p> + +<p>Clare did not understand him.</p> + +<p>“Do they cheat?” he asked.</p> + +<p>“No; I don’t suppose they cheat worse than anybody else. But it ain’t +respectable.”</p> + +<p>Had he known a little more, Clare might have asserted that the men +about the menagerie were at least as respectable as almost any farmer +with a horse to sell. But he knew next to nothing of wickedness, +whence many a man whose skull he had brains enough to fill three +times, regarded him as a simpleton.</p> + +<p>Clare thought everything honest honourable. When people said +otherwise, he did not understand, and continued to act according as he +understood. A thousand dishonourable things are done, and largely +approved, which Clare would not have touched with one of his fingers: +he could see nothing more dishonourable in having to do with wild +beasts than in having to do with tame ones. If any boy wants to know +the sort of thing I count in that thousand, I answer him—“The next +thing you are asked to do, or are inclined to do—if you have any +doubt about it, DON’T DO IT.” That is the way to know the honourable +thing from the dishonourable.</p> + +<p>Clare made no attempt to argue the question with the farmer. He +inquired of him the nearest way to the town, and went—the quicker +that he heard the voice of Mrs. Goodenough, calling her husband to +supper.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XLIV">Chapter XLIV.<br><span class="smcap">A Third Mother.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Who ever had a sovereign for the first time in his life, and did not +feel rich? Clare trudged along merrily, and Abdiel shared his +joy. They had to sleep out of doors nevertheless; for by this time +Clare knew that a boy, especially a boy in rags, must mind whom he +asks to change a sovereign. In the lee of a hay-mow, on a little loose +hay, they slept, Abdiel in Clare’s bosom, and slept well.</p> + +<p>There was not much temptation to lie long after waking, and the +companions were early on their way. It was yet morning when they came +to the public house where Clare had his first and last half-pint of +beer. The landlady stood at the newly opened door, with her fists in +her sides, looking out on the fresh world, lost in some such thought +as was possible to her. Clare pulled off his cap, and bade her good +morning as he passed. Perhaps she knew she did not deserve politeness; +anyhow she took Clare’s for impudence, and came swooping upon him. He +stopped and waited her approach, perplexed as to the cause of it; and +was so unprepared for the box on the ear she dealt him, that it almost +threw him down. Her ankle was instantly in Abdiel’s sharp teeth. She +gave a frightful screech, and Clare, coming to himself, though still +stupid from her blow and his own surprise, called off the dog. The +woman limped raging to the house, and Clare thought it prudent to go +his way. He talked severely to Abdiel as they went; but though the dog +could understand much, I doubt if he understood that lecture. For +Abdiel was one of the few, even among dogs, with whom the defence of +master or friend is an inborn, instinctive duty; and strong temptation +even has but a poor chance against the sense of duty in a dog.</p> + +<p>It was night when they entered the town. They were already a weary +pair when the far sounds of the brass band of the menagerie, mostly +made up of attendants on the animals, first entered their ears. The +marketing was over; the band was issuing its last invitation to the +merry-makers to walk up and see strange sights; its notes were just +dying to their close, when the wayfarers arrived at the foot of the +steps leading to the platform where the musicians stood. Clare +ascended, and Abdiel crept after him.</p> + +<p>At a table in a small curtained recess on the platform, sat the +mistress to receive the money of those that entered. Clare laid his +sovereign before her. She took it up without looking at him, but at it +she looked doubtfully. She threw it on her table. It would not ring. +She bit it with her white teeth, and looked at it again; then at +length gave a glance at the person who offered it. Her dull lamp +flickered in the puffs of the night-wind, and she did not recognize +Clare. She saw but a white-faced, ragged boy, and threw him back his +sovereign.</p> + +<p>“Won’t pass,” she said with decision, not unmingled with contempt. She +sat at the receipt of money, where too many men and women cease to be +ladies and gentlemen.</p> + +<p>Clare did not at first understand. He stood motionless and, for the +second time that day, bewildered. How could money be no money?</p> + +<p>“Ain’t you got sixpence?” she asked.</p> + +<p>“No, ma’am,” answered Clare. “I haven’t had sixpence for many a day.”</p> + +<p>The moment he spoke, the woman looked him sharply in the face, and +knew him.</p> + +<p>“Drat my stupid eyes!” she said fervently. “That I shouldn’t ha’ known +you! Walk in, walk in. Go where you please, and do as you +please. You’re right welcome.—Where did you get that sov.?”</p> + +<p>“From Farmer Goodenough.”</p> + +<p>“Good enough, I hope, not to take advantage of an innocent prince! Was +it for taking home the bull?”</p> + +<p>“No, ma’am. I didn’t take the bull home. The bull took me to the old +home where we used to be together. He didn’t want a new one!”</p> + +<p>“Well, never mind now. Give me the sovereign. I’ll talk to you by and +by. Go in, or the show ’ill be over. Look after your dog, though. We +don’t like dogs. He mustn’t go in.”</p> + +<p>“I’ll send him right outside, if you wish it, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>“I do.—But will he stay out?”</p> + +<p>“He will, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>Clare took up Abdiel, and setting him at the top of the steps, told +him to go down and wait. Abdiel went hopping down, like a dirty little +white cataract out on its own hook, turned in under the steps, and +deposited himself there until his master should call him.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XLV">Chapter XLV.<br><span class="smcap">The Menagerie.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>A strange smell was in Clare’s nostrils, and as he went down the steps +inside, it grew stronger. He did not dislike it; but it set him +thinking why it should so differ from that of domestic animals. He was +presently in the midst of a vision attractive to all boys, but which +few had ever looked upon with such intelligent wonder as he; for Clare +had read and re-read every book about animals upon which he could lay +his hands. He had a great power too of remembering what he read; for +he never let a description glide away over the outside of his eyes, +but always put it inside his thinking place. What with pictures and +descriptions, he seemed to know, as he looked around him, every animal +on which his eyes fell.</p> + +<p>The area was by no means crowded. There had been many visitors during +the day, but now it was late. He could see into all the cages that +formed the sides of the enclosure. Many of the creatures seemed +restless, few sleepy: night was the waking time for most of them. How +should a great roaming, hunting cat go to sleep in a little cube of +darkness! “Oh,” thought Clare, “how gladly would I help them to bear +it! I could bear it myself with somebody near to be kind to me!”</p> + +<p>He had begun to feel that the quiet happiness to which he was once so +accustomed that he did not think much about it, was his because it was +<i>given</i> him. He had begun to see that it did not come to him of +itself, but from the love of his father and mother. He had yet to +learn that it was given to them to give to him by the Father of +fathers and mothers. But he was beginning to prize every least +kindness shown him. This re-acted on his desire to make the happiness +greater and the pain less everywhere about him. He had little chance +of doing much for people, he thought; but he knew how to do things for +some animals, and perhaps it was only necessary to know others to be +able to do something for them too!</p> + +<p>Thoughts like these passing through his mind, and his gaze wandering +hither and thither over the shifting shapes, his eyes rested on the +tenant of one of the cages, and his heart immediately grew very sore, +for he seemed unable to lift his head. He was a big animal, alone in +his prison, of a blackish colour, and awkward appearance. He went +nearer, and found he had a big ring in his nose like Nimrod. But to +the ring was fastened a strong chain, and the chain was bolted down to +the floor of the cage, which was of iron covered with boards, in their +turn covered with a thick sheet of lead. The chain was so short that +it held the poor creature’s head within about a foot of the floor. He +could not lift it higher, or move it farther on either side; but he +kept moving it constantly. It was a pitiful sight, and Clare went +nearer still, drawn far more by compassion, and indeed sympathy, than +by curiosity. He was a terrible brute, a big grizzly bear, ugly to +repulsiveness. The snarling scorn, the sneering, lip-writhing hate of +the demoniacal grin with which he received the boy, was hideous; the +rattling, pebble-jarring growl that came from his devilish throat was +loathing embodied. What if spirits worse than their own get into some +of the creatures by virtue of the likeness between them! One day will +be written, perhaps, a history of animals very different from any +attempted by mere master in zoology. Clare spoke to the beast again +and again, but was unvaryingly answered by the same odious snarl, +curling his lip under his nose-ring. It seemed to express the imagined +delight of tearing him limb from limb.</p> + +<p>“Poor fellow!” said Clare, “how can he be good-tempered with that +torturing ring and chain! His unalterable position must make his every +bone ache!”</p> + +<p>But had his nose been set free, such a raging-bear-struggle to get at +the nearest of his fellow-prisoners would have ensued, as must soon +have torn to shreds the partition between them. For he was a +beast-bedlamite, an animal volcano, a furnace of death, an incarnate +paroxysm of wrath. The inspiration of the creature, so far as one +could see, was pure hate.</p> + +<p>The boy turned aside with quivering heart—sore for the grizzly’s +nose, and sorer still for the grizzly himself that he was so +unfriendly.</p> + +<p>Right opposite, a creature of a far differing disposition seemed +casting defiance to all the ills of life. As he turned with a sad +despair from the grizzly, Clare caught sight of his pranks, and +hastened across the area. The creature kept bounding from side to side +of his cage, agile and frolicsome as a kitten. But the light was poor, +and Clare could not even conjecture to which of the cat-kinds he +belonged. When he came near his cage, he saw that he was yellowish +like a lion, and thought perhaps he might be a young lion. He had no +mane. Clare judged him four feet in length without the tail—or +perhaps four and a half. A little way off was the real lion—a young +one, it is true, but quite grown, with a thin ruffy mane, and lordly +carriage and gaze. It was he whose roar had challenged Nimrod, giving +the topmost flutter to the flame of his wrath. But Clare was so taken +with the frolicsome creature before him, that he gave but a glance at +the grand one as he walked up and down his prison, and turned again to +the merry one disporting himself alone, who seemed to find the +pleasure of life in great games with companions no one saw but +himself. For minutes he stood regarding the gladness of God’s +creature. A wild thing of the woods and plains, he made the most of +the bars and floor and roof of his cage. No one careless of liberty +could make such bounds as those; yet he was joyous in closest +imprisonment! His liberty gone, his freedom contracted to a few cubic +feet, his space diminished almost to the mould of his body, the great +wild philosopher created his own liberty, made it out of his own love +of it. Like a live, erratic shuttle he went to and fro, unweaving, +unravelling, unwinding, drawing out the knot of confinement, flinging +out, radiating and spreading and breathing out space in all +directions, by multitudinous motion of disentanglement! Space gone +from him, space in the abstract should replace it! He would not be +slave to condition! Space unconditioned should be his! For him liberty +should not lie in space, but in his own soul. Room should be but the +poor out-side symbol of his inward freedom! He would spin out, he +would weave, he would unroll essential liberty into spiritual space! +His mind to him a kingdom was. Not a grumble, not a snarl! He left +discontent to men, to build their own prisons withal. A proud man with +everything he longs for, if such a man there be, is but a slave; this +creature of the glad creator was and would be free, because he was a +free soul. Prison bars could not touch that by whose virtue he was and +would be free!</p> + +<p>The germ of this thinking was in the mind of Clare while he stood and +gazed; and as he told me the story, its ripeness came thus, or nearly +thus, from his lips; for he had thought much in lonely places.</p> + +<p>As he gazed and sympathized, there awoke within him that strange +consciousness which my reader must, at one time or another, have +known—of being on the point of remembering something. It was not a +memory that came, but a memory of a memory—the shadow of a memory +gone, but trying to come out from behind a veil—a sense of having +once known something. It gave another aspect to the blessed creature +before him. The creature and himself seemed for a moment to belong +together to another time. Could he have seen such an animal before? He +did not think so! He could never have visited a menagerie and +forgotten it! If he had known such a creature, his after-reading would +have recalled it, he would know it now! He could tell the lion and the +tiger and the leopard, although he seemed to know he had never seen +one of them; he could not tell this animal, and yet—and yet!—what +was it? The feeling itself lasted scarce an instant, and went no +farther. No memory came to him. The foiled expectation was all he +had. The very reasoning about it helped to obliterate the shape of the +feeling itself. He could not even recall how the thing had felt; he +could only remember it had been there. It was now but the shadow of +the shadow of a dream—a yet vaguer memory than that thinnest of +presences which had at the first tantalized him. We remember what we +cannot recall.</p> + +<p>Perhaps the rousing of the odd, fantastic feeling had been favoured by +the slumber beginning to encroach on body and brain. While he stood +looking at the one creature, all the wonderful creatures began to get +mixed up together, and he thought it better to go and search for some +field of sleep, where he might mow a little for his use. He said +good-night to the great, gentle, jubilant cat, turned from him +unwillingly, and went up the steps. Almost every spectator was +gone. At the top of them he turned for a last look, but could +distinguish nothing except the dim form of the young lion, as he +thought him, still gamboling in the presence of his maker.</p> + +<p>He thought to see the mistress of the menagerie, but she was no longer +in her curtained box. He went out on the deserted platform, and down +the steps. Abdiel was already at the foot when he reached it, wagging +his weary little tail.</p> + +<p>They set out to look for a shelter. Their search, however, was so much +in vain, that at last they returned and lay down under one of the +wagons, on the hard ground of the public square. Sleeping so often out +of doors, he had never yet taken cold.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XLVI">Chapter XLVI.<br><span class="smcap">The Angel of the Wild Beasts.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>When Clare looked up he saw nothing between him and the sky. They had +dragged the caravan from above him, and he had not moved. Abdiel +indeed waked at the first pull, but had lain as still as a +mouse—ready to rouse his master, but not an instant before it should +be necessary.</p> + +<p>Clare saw the sky, but he saw something else over him, better than the +sky—the face of Mrs. Halliwell, the mistress of the menagerie. In it, +as she stood looking down on him, was compassion, mingled with +self-reproach.</p> + +<p>Clare jumped up, saying, “Good morning, ma’am!” He was yet but half +awake, and staggered with sleep.</p> + +<p>“My poor boy!” answered the woman, “I sent you to sleep on the cold +earth, with a sovereign of your own in my pocket! I made sure you +would come and ask me for it! You’re too innocent to go about the +world without a mother!”</p> + +<p>She turned her face away.</p> + +<p>“But, ma’am, you know I couldn’t have offered it to anybody,” said +Clare. “It wasn’t good!—Besides, before I knew that,” he went on, +finding she did not reply, “there was nobody but you I dared offer it +to: they would have said I stole it—because I’m so shabby!” he added, +looking down at his rags. “But it ain’t in the clothes, ma’am—is it?”</p> + +<p>Getting the better of her feelings for a moment, she turned her face +and said,—</p> + +<p>“It was all my fault! The sov. is a good one. It’s only cracked! I +ought to have known, and changed it for you. Then all would have been +well!”</p> + +<p>“I don’t think it would have made any difference, ma’am. We would +rather sleep on the ground than in a bed that mightn’t be +clean—wouldn’t we, Abby?” The dog gave a short little bark, as he +always did when his master addressed him by his name.—“But I’m so +glad!” Clare went on. “I was sure Mr. Goodenough thought the sovereign +all right when he gave it me!—Were you ever disappointed in a +sovereign, ma’am?”</p> + +<p>“I been oftener disappointed in them as owed ’em!” she answered. “But +to think o’ me snug in bed, an’ you sleepin’ out i’ the dark night! I +can’t abide the thought on it!”</p> + +<p>“Don’t let it trouble you, ma’am; we’re used to it. Ain’t we, Abby?”</p> + +<p>“Then you oughtn’t to be! and, please God, you shall be no more! But +come along and have your breakfast. We don’t start till the last.”</p> + +<p>“Please, ma’am, may Abdiel come too?”</p> + +<p>“In course! ‘Love me, love my dog!’ Ain’t that right?”</p> + +<p>“Yes, ma’am; but some people like dogs worse than boys.”</p> + +<p>“A good deal depends on the dog. When folk brings up their dogs as bad +as they do their childern, I want neither about me. But your dog’s a +well-behaved dog. Still, he must learn not to come in sight o’ the +animals.”</p> + +<p>“He will learn, ma’am!—Abdiel, lie down, and don’t come till I call +you.”</p> + +<p>At the word, the dog dropped, and lay.</p> + +<p>The house-caravan stood a little way off, drawn aside when they began +to break up. They ascended its steps behind, and entered an enchanting +little room. It had muslin curtains to the windows, and a small stove +in which you could see the bright red coals. On the stove stood a +coffee-pot and a covered dish. How nice and warm the place felt, after +the nearly shelterless night!</p> + +<p>The breakfast-things were still on the table. Mr. Halliwell had had +his breakfast, but Mrs. Halliwell would not eat until she had found +the boy. She had been unhappy about him all the night. Her husband had +assured her the sovereign was a good one, and the boy had told her he +had no money but the sovereign! She little knew how seldom he fared +better than that same night! When he got among hay or straw, that was +luxury.</p> + +<p>They sat down to breakfast, and the good woman was very soon confirmed +in the notion that the boy was a gentleman.</p> + +<p>“Call your dog now,” she said, “an’ let’s see if he’ll come!”</p> + +<p>“May I whistle, ma’am?”</p> + +<p>“Why not!—But will he hear you?”</p> + +<p>“He has very sharp ears, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>Clare gave a low, peculiar whistle. In a second or two, they heard an +anxious little whine at the door. Clare made haste to open it. There +stood Abdiel, with the words in his eyes, as plain almost as if he +spoke them—“Did you call, sir?” The woman caught him and held him to +her bosom.</p> + +<p>“You blessed little thing!” she said.</p> + +<p>And surely if there be a blessing to be had, it is for them that obey.</p> + +<p>Clare heard and felt the horses put-to, but the hostess of this +Scythian house did not rise, and he too went on with his +breakfast. When they were in motion, it was not so easy to eat nicely, +but he managed very well. By the time he had done, they had left the +town behind them. He wanted to help Mrs. Halliwell with the +breakfast-things, but whether she feared he would break some of them, +or did not think it masculine work, she would not allow him.</p> + +<p>Nothing had been said about his going with them; she had taken that +for granted. Clare began to think perhaps he ought to take his leave: +there was nothing for him to do! He and Abdiel ought at least to get +out and walk, instead of burdening the poor horses with their weight, +when they were so well rested, and had had such a good breakfast! But +when he said so to Mrs. Halliwell, she told him she must have a little +talk with him first, and formally proposed that he should enter their +service, and do whatever he was fit for in the menagerie.</p> + +<p>“You’re not frightened of the beasts, are you?” she said.</p> + +<p>“Oh no, ma’am; I love them!” answered Clare. “But are you sure +Mr. Halliwell thinks I could be of use?”</p> + +<p>“Don’t you think yourself you could?” asked Mrs. Halliwell.</p> + +<p>“I know I could, ma’am; but I should not like him to take me just +because he was sorry for me!”</p> + +<p>“You innocent! People are in no such hurry to help their +neighbours. My husband’s as good a man as any going; but it don’t mean +he would take a boy because nobody else would have him. A fool of a +woman might—I won’t say; but not a man I ever knew. No, no! He saw +the way you managed that bull!—a far more unreasonable creature than +any we have to do with!”</p> + +<p>“Ah! you don’t know Nimrod, ma’am!”</p> + +<p>“I don’t, an’ I don’t want to!—Such wild animals ought to be put in +caravans!” she added, with a laugh.</p> + +<p>“Well, ma’am,” said Clare, “if you and Mr. Halliwell are of one mind, +nothing would please me so much as to serve you and the beasts. But I +should like to be sure about it, for where husband and wife are not of +one mind—well, it is uncomfortable!”</p> + +<p>Thereupon he told her how he had stood with the farmer and his wife; +and from that she led him on through his whole story—not +unaccompanied with tears on the part of his deliverer, for she was a +tender-souled as well as generous and friendly woman. In her heart she +rejoiced to think that the boy’s sufferings would now be at an end; +and thenceforward she was, as he always called her, his third mother.</p> + +<p>“My poor, ill-used child!” she said. “But I’ll be a mother to you—if +you’ll have me!”</p> + +<p>“You wouldn’t mind if I thought rather often of my two other mothers, +ma’am—would you?” he said.</p> + +<p>“God forbid, boy!” she answered. “If I were your real mother, would I +have my own flesh and blood ungrateful? Should I be proud of him for +loving nobody but me? That’s like the worst of the beasts: they love +none but their little ones—and that only till they’re tired of the +trouble of them!”</p> + +<p>“Thank you! Then I will be your son Clare, please, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>The next time they stopped, she made her husband come into her +caravan, and then and there she would and did have everything +arranged. When both her husband and the boy would have left his wages +undetermined, she would not hear of it, but insisted that so much a +week should be fixed at once to begin with. She had no doubt, she +said, that her husband would soon be ready enough to raise his wages; +but he must have his food and five shillings a week now, and +Mr. Halliwell must advance money to get him decent clothes: he might +keep the wages till the clothes were paid for!</p> + +<p>Everything she wished was agreed to by her husband, and at the next +town, Clare’s new mother saw him dressed to her satisfaction, and to +his own. She would have his holiday clothes better than his present +part in life required, and she would not let his sovereign go toward +paying for them: that she would keep ready in case he might want it! +Her eyes followed him about with anxious pride—as if she had been his +mother in fact as she was in truth.</p> + +<p>He had at once plenty to do. The favour of his mother saved him from +no kind of work, neither had he any desire it should. Every morning he +took his share in cleaning out the cages, and in setting water for the +beasts, and food for the birds and such other creatures as took it +when they pleased. At the proper intervals he fed as many as he might +of those animals that had stated times for their meals; and found the +advantage of this in its facilitating his friendly approaches to +them. He helped with the horses also—with whose harness and ways he +was already familiar. In a very short time he was known as a friend by +every civilized animal in and about the caravans.</p> + +<p>He did all that was required of him, and more. Not everyone of course +had a right to give him orders, but Clare was not particular as to who +wanted him, or for what. He was far too glad to have work to look at +the gift askance. He did not make trouble of what ought to be none, by +saying, with the spirit of a slave, “It’s not my place.” He did many +things which he might have disputed, for he never thought of disputing +them. Thus, both for himself and for others, he saved a great deal of +time, and avoided much annoyance and much quarrelling. Thus also he +gained many friends.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XLVII">Chapter XLVII.<br><span class="smcap">Glum Gunn.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>He had but one enemy, and he did not make him such: he was one by +nature. For he was so different from Clare that he disliked him the +moment he saw him, and it took but a day to ripen his dislike into +hatred. Like Mr. Maidstone, he found the innocent fearlessness of +Clare’s expression repulsive. His fingers twitched, he said, to have a +twist at the sheep-nose of him. Unhappily for Clare, he was of +consequence in the menagerie, having money in the concern. He was +half-brother to the proprietor, but so unlike him that he might not +have had a drop of blood from the same source. An ill-tempered, +imperious man, he would hurt himself to have his way, for he was the +merest slave to what he fancied. When a man <i>will</i> have a thing, right +or wrong, that man is a slave to that thing—the meanest of slaves, a +willing one. He was the terror of the men beneath him, heeding no man +but his brother—and him only because he knew “he would stand no +nonsense.” To his sister-in-law he was civil: she was his brother’s +wife, and his brother was proud of her! Also he knew that she was +perfect in her part of the business. So it was reason to stand as well +as he might with her!</p> + +<p>Clare had no suspicion that he more than disliked him. It took him +days indeed to discover even that he did not love him—notwithstanding +the bilious eye which, when its owner was idle, kept constantly +following him. And idle he often was, not from laziness, but from the +love of ordering about, and looking superior.</p> + +<p>It was natural that such a man should also be cruel. There are who +find their existence pleasant in proportion as they make that of +others miserable. He had no liking for any of the animals, regarding +them only as property with never a right;—as if God would make +anything live without thereby giving it rights! To Glum Gunn, as he +was commonly called behind his back, the animals were worth so much +money to sell, and so much to show. Yet he prided himself that he had +a great influence as well as power over them, an occult superiority +that made him their lord. It was merely a phase of the vulgarest +self-conceit. He posed to himself as a lion-tamer! He had never tamed +a lion, or any creature else, in his life; but when he had a wild +thing safe within iron bars, then he “let him know who was his +master!” By the terror of his whip, and means far worse, he compelled +obedience. The grizzly alone, of the larger animals, he never +interfered with.</p> + +<p>From the first he received Clare’s “<i>Good-morning, sir</i>,” with a +silent stare; and the boy at last, thinking he did not like to be so +greeted, gave up the salutation. This roused Gunn’s anger and +increased his hate. But indeed any boy petted by his sister-in-law, +would have been odious to him; and any boy whatever would have found +him a hard master. Clare was for a while protected by the man’s +unreadiness to have words with his brother, who always took his wife’s +part; but the tyrant soon learned that he might venture far.</p> + +<p>For he saw, by the boy’s ready smile, that he never resented anything, +which the brute, as most boys would have done, attributed to +cowardice; and he learned that he never carried tales to his sister, +of which, instead of admiring him for his reticence, he took +advantage, and set about making life bitter to him.</p> + +<p>It was some time before he began to succeed, for Clare was hard to +annoy. Patient, and right ready to be pleased, he could hardly imagine +offence intended; the thought was all but unthinkable to Clare’s +nature; so he let evil pass and be forgotten as if it had never been. +Once, as he ran along with a heavy pail of water, Gunn shot out his +foot and threw him down: he rose with a cut in his forehead, and a +smile on his lips. He carried the mark of the pail as long as he +carried his body, but it was long before he believed he had been +tripped up. Had it been proved to him at the time, he would have taken +it as a joke, intending no hurt. He did not see the lurid smile on the +man’s face as he turned away, a smile of devilish delight at the +discomfiture of a hated fellow-creature. Gunn put him to the dirtiest +work—only to find that it did not trouble him: the boy was a rare +gentleman—unwilling another should have more that he might have less +of the disagreeable. I have two or three times heard him say that no +man had the right to require of another the thing he would think +degrading to himself. He said he learned this from the New Testament. +“But,” he said, “nothing God has made necessary, can possibly be +degrading. It may not be the thing for this or that man, at this or +that time, to do, but it cannot in itself be degrading.”</p> + +<p>The boy had to take his turn with several in acting showman to the +gazing crowd, and by and by the part fell to him oftenest. Each had +his own way of filling the office. One would repeat his information +like a lesson in which he was not interested, and expected no one else +to be interested. Another made himself the clown of the exhibition, +and joked as much and as well as he could. Gunn delighted in telling +as many lies as he dared: he must not be suspected of making fools of +his audience! Clare, who from books knew far more than any of the +others concerning the creatures in their wild state, and who, by +watching them because he loved them, had already noted things none of +the others had observed, and was fast learning more, talked to the +spectators out of his own sincere and warm interest, giving them from +his treasure things new and old—things he had read, and things he had +for himself discovered. Group after group of simple country people +would listen intently as he led them round, eager after every word; +and as any peg will do to hang hate upon, even this success was noted +with evil eye by Glum Gunn. Almost anything served to increase his +malignity. Whether or not it grew the faster that he had as yet found +no wider outlet for it, I cannot tell.</p> + +<p>At last, however, the tyrant learned how to inflict the keenest pain +on the tender-hearted boy, counting him the greater idiot that he +could so “be got at,” as he phrased it, and promising himself much +enjoyment from the discovery. But he did not know—how should he +know—what love may compel!</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XLVIII">Chapter XLVIII.<br><span class="smcap">The Puma.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>I need hardly say that by this time all the beasts with any +friendliness in them had for Clare a little more than their usual +amount of that feeling. But there was one between whom and him—I +prefer <i>who</i> to <i>which</i> for certain animals—a real friendship had +begun at once, and had grown and ripened rapidly till it was strong on +both sides. Clare’s new friend—and companion as much as circumstance +permitted—was the same whose lonely gambols had so much attracted him +the night he first entered the menagerie. The animal, whom Clare had +taken for a young lion—without being so far wrong, for he has often +been called the American lion—was the puma, or couguar, peculiar to +America, with a relation to the jaguar, also American, a little +similar to that of the lion to the tiger. But while the jaguar is as +wicked a beast as the tiger, the puma possesses, in relation to man, +far more than the fabulous generosity of the lion. Like every good +creature he has been misunderstood and slandered, but a few have known +him. He has doubtless degenerated in districts, for as the wild animal +must gradually disappear before the human, he cannot help becoming in +the process less friendly to humanity; but an essential and +distinctive characteristic of the puma is his love for the human +being—a love persistent, devoted, and long-suffering.</p> + +<p>Between such an animal and Clare, it is not surprising that friendship +should at once have blossomed. He stroked the paw of the Indian lion +the first morning, but the day was not over when he was stroking the +cheek of the puma; while all he could do with the grizzly at the end +of the month was to feed him a little on the sly, and get for thanks a +growl of the worse hate. There are men that would soonest tear their +benefactors, loathing them the more that they cannot get at them. I +suspect that in some mysterious way Glum Gunn and the bear were own +brothers. With the elephant Clare did what he pleased—never pleasing +anything that was not pleasing to the elephant.</p> + +<p>They came to a town where they exhibited every day for a week, and +there it was that the friendship of Clare and the puma reached its +perfection. One night the boy could not sleep, and drawn by his love, +went down among the cages to see how his fellow-creatures were getting +through the time of darkness. There was just light enough from a small +moon to show the dim outlines of the cages, and the motion without the +form of any moving animal. The puma, in his solitary yet joyous +gymnastics, was celebrating the rites of freedom according to his +custom. When Clare entered, he made a peculiar purring noise, and +ceased his amusement—a game at ball, with himself for the ball. Clare +went to him, and began as usual to stroke him on the face and nose; +whereupon the puma began to lick his hand with his dry rough +tongue. Clare wondered how it could be nice to have such a dry thing +always in his mouth, but did not pity him for what God had given +him. He had his arm through between the bars of the cage, and his face +pressed close against them, when suddenly the face of the animal was +rubbing itself against what it could reach of his. The end was, that +Clare drew aside the bolt of the cage-door, and got in beside the +puma. The creature’s gladness was even greater than if he had found a +friend of his own kind. Noses and cheeks and heads were rubbed +together; tongue licked, and hand stroked and scratched. Then they +began to frolic, and played a long time, the puma jumping over Clare, +and Clare, afraid to jump lest he should make a noise, tumbling over +the puma. The boy at length went fast asleep; and in the morning found +the creature lying with his head across his body, wide awake but +motionless, as if guarding him from disturbance. Nobody was stirring; +and Clare, who would not have their friendship exposed to every +comment, crept quietly from the cage, and went to his own bed.</p> + +<p>The next night, as soon as the place was quiet, Clare went down, and +had another game with the puma. Before their sport was over, he had +begun to teach him some of the tricks he had taught Abdiel; but he +could not do much for fear of making a noise and alarming some keeper.</p> + +<p>The same thing took place, as often as it was possible, for some +weeks, and Clare came to have as much confidence, in so far at least +as good intention was concerned, in the puma as in Abdiel. If only he +could have him out of the cage, that the dear beast might have a +little taste of old liberty! But not being certain how the puma would +behave to others, or if he could then control him, he felt he had no +right to release him.</p> + +<p>Now and then he would fall asleep in the cage, whereupon the puma +would always lie down close beside him. Whether the puma slept, I do +not know.</p> + +<p>On one such occasion, Clare started to his feet half-awake, roused by +a terrific roar. Right up on end stood the couguar, flattening his +front against the bars of the cage, which he clawed furiously, +snarling and spitting and yelling like the huge cat he was, every +individual hair on end, and his eyes like green lightning. Clatter, +clatter, went his great feet on the iron, as he tore now at this bar +now at that, to get at something out in the dim open space. It was too +dark for Clare to see what it was that thus infuriated him, but his +ear discovered what his eye could not. For now and then, woven into +the mad noise of the wild creature, in which others about him were +beginning to join, he heard the modest whimper of a very tame +one—Abdiel, against whose small person, gladly as he would have been +“naught a while,” this huge indignation was levelled. Must there not +be a deeper ground for the enmity of dogs and cats than evil human +incitement? Their antipathy will have to be explained in that history +of animals which I have said must one day be written.</p> + +<p>Clare had taken much pains to make Abdiel understand that he was not +to intrude where his presence was not desired—that the show was not +for him, and thought the dog had learned perfectly that never on any +pretence, or for any reason, was he to go down those steps, however +often he saw his master go down. This prohibition was a great trial to +Abdiel’s loving heart, but it had not until this night been a trial +too great for his loving will.</p> + +<p>When Clare left him, he thought he had taken his usual pains in +shutting him into a small cage he had made to use on such occasions, +lest he might be tempted to think, when he saw nobody about, that the +law no longer applied. But he had not been careful enough; and Abdiel, +sniffing about and finding his door unfastened, had interpreted the +fact as a sign that he might follow his master. Hence all the +coil. For pumas—whereby also must hang an explanation in that book of +zoology, have an intense hatred of dogs. Tame from cubhood, they never +get over their antipathy to them. With pumas it is “Love you, hate +your dog.” In the present case there could be no individual jealousy, +of which passion beasts and birds are very capable, for Pummy had +never seen Abby before. There may be in the puma an inborn jealousy of +dogs, as a race more favoured than pumas by the man whom yet they love +perhaps more passionately.</p> + +<p>As soon as Clare saw what the matter was, he slipped out of the cage, +and catching up the obnoxious offender—where he stood wagging all +over as if his entire body were but a self-informed tail—sped with +him to his room, and gave him a serious talking-to.</p> + +<p>The puma was quiet the moment the dog was out of his sight. Doubtless +he regarded Clare as his champion in distress, and blessed him for the +removal of that which his soul hated. But, alas, mischief was already +afoot! Gunn, waked by the roaring, came flying with his whip, and the +remnants of poor Pummy’s excitement were enough to betray him to the +eyes of the tamer of caged animals. Clare would have recognized by the +roar itself the individual in trouble; but Glum Gunn had little +knowledge even of the race. He counted the couguar a coward, because +he showed no resentment. A man may strike him or wound him, and he +will make no retaliation; he will even let a man go on to kill him, +and make no defence beyond moans and tears. But Gunn knew nothing of +these facts; he only knew that this puma would not touch <i>him</i>. He was +not aware that if he turned the two into the arena of the show, the +puma would kill the grizzly; or that in their own country, the puma +persecutes the jaguar as if he hated him for not being like himself, +the friend of man: the Gauchos of the Pampas call him “The Christians’ +Friend.” Gunn did not even know that the horse is the puma’s favourite +food: he will leap on the back of a horse at full speed, with his paws +break his neck as he runs, and come down with him in a rolling +heap. Neither did he know that, while submissive to man—as if the +maker of both had said to him, “Slay my other creatures, but do my +anointed no harm,”—he could yet upon occasion be provoked to punish +though not to kill him.</p> + +<p>Glum Gunn rushed across the area, jumped into the cage of the puma, +and began belabouring him with his whip. The beast whimpered and wept, +and the brute belaboured him. Clare heard the changed cry of his +friend, and came swooping like the guardian angel he was. When he saw +the patient creature on his haunches like a dog, accepting Gunn’s +brutality without an attempt to escape it—except, indeed, by dodging +any blows at his head so cleverly that the ruffian could not once hit +it—he bounded to the cage, wild with anger and pity. But Gunn stood +with his back against the door of it, and he was reduced to entreaty.</p> + +<p>“Oh, sir! sir!” he cried, in a voice full of tears; “it was all my +fault! Abby came to look for me, and I didn’t know Pummy disliked +dogs!”</p> + +<p>“Do you tell me, you rascal, that you were down among the hanimals +when I supposed you in your bed?”</p> + +<p>“Yes, sir, I was. I didn’t know there was any harm. I wasn’t doing +anything wrong.”</p> + +<p>“Hold your jaw! What <i>was</i> you doing?”</p> + +<p>“I was only in the cage with the puma.”</p> + +<p>“You was! You have the impudence to tell me that to my face! I’ll +teach you, you cotton-face! you milk-pudding! to go corrupting the +hanimals and making them not worth their salt!”</p> + +<p>He swung himself out of the cage-door in a fury, but Clare, with his +friend in danger, would not run. The wretch seized him by the collar, +and began to lash him as he had been lashing the puma. Happily he was +too close to him to give him such stinging blows.</p> + +<p>With the first hiss of the thong, came a tearing screech from the +puma, as he flung himself in fury upon the door of his cage. Gunn in +his wrath with Clare had forgotten to bolt it. Dragging with his +claws, he found it unfastened, pulled it open, and like a huge shell +from a mortar, shot himself at Gunn. Down he went. For one moment the +puma stood over him, swinging his tail in great sweeps, and looking at +him, doubtless with indignation. Then before Clare could lay hold of +him, for Clare too had fallen by the onset, Pummy turned a scornful +back upon his enemy, and walking away with a slow, careless stride, as +if he were not worth thinking of more, leaped into his cage, and lay +down. The thing passed so swiftly that Clare did not see him touch the +man with his paw, and thought he had but thrown him down with his +weight. The beast, however, had not left the brute without the lesson +he needed; he had given him just one little pat on the side of the +head.</p> + +<figure class="figcenter illowp44" id="006" style="max-width: 37.3125em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/006.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">Clare finds the advantage of a powerful friend.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>Gunn rose staggering. The skin and something more was torn down his +cheek from the temple almost to the chin, and the blood was +streaming. Clare hastened to help him, but he flung him aside, +muttering with an oath, “I’ll make you pay for this!” and went out, +holding his head with both hands.</p> + +<p>Clare went and shot the bolt of the cage. Pummy sprang up. His tail +and swift-shifting feet showed eager expectation of a romp. He had +already forgotten the curling lash of the terrible whip! But Clare +bade him good-night with a kiss through the bars.</p> + +<p>Glum Gunn kept his bed for more than a week. When at length he +appeared, a demonstration of the best art of the surgeon of the town, +he was not beautiful to look upon. To the end of his evil earthly days +he bore an ugly scar; and neither his heart nor his temper were the +better for his well deserved punishment.</p> + +<p>Mrs. Halliwell questioned Clare about the whole thing, inquiring +further and further as his answers suggested new directions. Her +catechism ended with a partial discovery of Gunn’s behaviour to her +<i>protegé</i>, whom she loved the more that he had been so silent +concerning it. She stood perturbed. One moment her face flushed with +anger, the next turned pale with apprehension. She bit her lip, and +the tears came in her eyes.</p> + +<p>“Never mind, mother,” said Clare, who saw no reason for such emotion; +“I’m not afraid of him.”</p> + +<p>“I know you’re not, sonny,” she answered; “but that don’t make me the +less afraid for you. He’s a bad man, that brother-in-law of mine! I +fear he’ll do you a mischief. I’m afraid I did wrong in taking you! I +ought to have done what I could for you without keeping you about +me. We can’t get rid of him because he’s got money in the business. +Not that he’s part owner—I don’t mean that! If we’d got the money +handy, we’d pay him off at once!”</p> + +<p>“I don’t care about myself,” said Clare. “I don’t mean I like to be +kicked, but it don’t make me miserable. What I can’t bear is to see +him cruel to the beasts. I love the beasts, mother—even cross old +Grizzly.—But Mr. Gunn don’t meddle much with <i>him</i>!”</p> + +<p>“He respects his own ugly sort!” answered Mrs. Halliwell, with a +laugh.</p> + +<p>For a while it was plain to Clare that the master kept an eye on his +brother, and on himself and the puma. On one occasion he told the +assembled staff that he would have no tyranny: every one knew there +was among them but one tyrant. Gunn saw that his brother was awake and +watching: it was a check on his conduct, but he hated Clare the +worse. For the puma, he was afraid of him now, and went no more into +his cage.</p> + +<p>With the rest of the men Clare was a favourite, for they knew him true +and helpful, and constantly the same: they could always depend on him! +Abdiel shared in the favour shown his master. They said the dog was no +beauty, and had not a hair of breeding, but he was almost a human +creature, if he wasn’t too good for one, and it was a shame to kick +him.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_XLIX">Chapter XLIX.<br><span class="smcap">Glum Gunn’s Revenge.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>They had opened the menagerie in a certain large town. It was the +evening-exhibition, and Clare was going his round with his wand of +office, pointing to the different animals, and telling of them what he +thought would most interest his hearers, when another attendant, the +most friendly of all, came behind him, and whispered that Glum Gunn +had got hold of Abby, and must be going to do the dog a +mischief. Clare instantly gave him his wand, and bolted through the +crowd, reproaching himself that, because Abby seemed restless, he had +shut him up: if he had not been shut up, Gunn would not have got hold +of him!</p> + +<p>When he reached the top of the steps, there was Gunn on the platform, +addressing the crowd. It was plain to the boy, by this time not +inexperienced, that he had been drinking, and, though not drunk, had +taken enough to rouse the worst in him. He had the poor dog by the +scruff of the neck, and was holding him out at arm’s-length. Abdiel +was the very picture of wretchedness. Except in colour and size, he +was more like a flea than like any sort of dog—with his hind legs +drawn up, his tail tucked in tight between them, and his back-bone +curved into a half circle. In this uncomfortable plight, the tyrant +was making a burlesque speech about him.</p> + +<p>“Here you see, ladies and gentlemen,” he said, resuming a little, for +a few fresh spectators were in the act of joining the border of the +crowd, “as I have already had the honour of informing you, one of the +most extraordinary productions of the vegetable kingdom. It is not +unnatural that you should be, as I see you are, inclined to dispute +the assertion. I am, indeed, far from being surprised at your +scepticism; the very strangeness of the phenomenon consists in his +being to all appearance neither more nor less than a dog. But when I +have the honour of leaving you to your astonishment, I shall have +convinced you that he is in reality nothing but a vegetable. I would +plainly call him what he is—a cucumber, did I not fear the statement +would demand of you more than your powers of credence, evidently +limited, could well afford. But when I have, before your eyes, cut the +throat of this vegetable, so extremely like an ugly mongrel, and when +those eyes see no single drop of blood follow the knife, then you will +be satisfied of the truth of my assertion; and, having gazed on such a +specimen of Nature’s jugglery, will, I hope, do me the honour to walk +up and behold yet greater wonders within.”</p> + +<p>He ceased, and set about getting his knife from his pocket.</p> + +<p>Clare, watching Gunn’s every motion, had partially sheltered himself +behind the side of the doorway. One who did not know Gunn, might well +have taken the thing for a practical joke, as innocent as it was +foolish, the pretended conclusion of which would be met by some +comical frustration, probably the dog’s escape; but Clare saw that his +friend was in mortal peril. With the eye of one used to wild animals +and the unexpectedness of their sudden motions, he stood following +every movement of Gunn’s hands, ready to anticipate whatever action +might indicate its own approach: he watched like the razor-clawed +lynx. While Gunn held Abdiel as he did, he could not seriously injure +him; and although he was hurting him dreadfully, his hate-possessed +fingers, like a live, writhing vice, worrying and squeezing the skin +of his poor little neck, it yet was better to wait the right moment.</p> + +<p>When he saw the arm that held the dog drawn in, and the other hand +move to the man’s pocket, he knew that in a moment more, with a +theatrical cry of dismay from the murderer, the body of his friend +would be dashed on the ground, his head half off, and the blood +streaming from his neck. They were mostly a rather vulgar people that +stood about the platform, not a few of them capable of being delighted +with such an end to a joke poor without some catastrophe.</p> + +<p>The wretch had stooped a little, and slightly relaxed his hold on the +dog to open his knife, when with a bound that doubled the force of the +blow Clare struck him on the side of the head. He had no choice where +to hit him, and his fist fell on the spot so lately torn by the claws +of Pummy. The tyrant fell, and lay for a moment stunned. Abdiel flung +himself on his master, exultant at finding the thing after all the +joke he had been trying in vain to believe it. Clare caught him up and +dashed down the steps, one instant before Glum Gunn rose, cursing +furiously. Clare charged the crowd: it was not a time to be civil! +Abdiel’s life was in imminent danger! That his own was in the same +predicament did not occur to him.</p> + +<p>His sudden rush took the crowd by surprise, or those next the caravans +would, I fear, have stopped him. Some started to follow him, but the +portion of the crowd he came to next, had more in it of a better sort, +and closed up behind him. There all the women and most of the men took +the part of the boy that loved his dog.</p> + +<p>“What be you a-shovin’ at?” bawled a huge country-man, against whom +Gunn made a cannon as he rushed in pursuit. “Aw’ll knock ’ee flat—aw +wull! Let little un an’ ’s dawg aloan! Aw be for un! Hit me an’ ye +choose—aw doan’t objec’!”</p> + +<p>Every attempt Gunn made to pass him, the man pushed his great body in +his way, and he soon saw there was no chance of overtaking Clare. The +wings of Hate are swift, but not so swift as those of rescuing Love; +and Help is far readier to run to Love than to Hate.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_L">Chapter L.<br><span class="smcap">Clare seeks Help.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Clare got out of the crowd, and was soon beyond sight of anyone that +knew what had taken place, his heart exulting that he had saved his +friend who trusted in him. He hurried on, heedless whither, his only +thought to get away from the man that would murder Abby; and the town +was a long way behind ere the question of what they were to do for +supper and shelter presented itself. This had grown a strange thought, +so long had the caravan been to him a house of warmth and plenty. But +comfort has its disadvantages; and Clare discovered, with some dismay, +that he was not quite so free as ere the luxurious life of the last +few weeks began: both Abby and he would be less able, he feared, to +bear hunger and cold. It was but to start afresh, however, and grow +abler! One consolation was, that, if they felt hunger more, it could +not do them so much harm: they had more capital to go upon. He must +not gather cowardice instead of courage from a season of prosperity! +He was glad for Abdiel, though, that he grew his own clothes: he had +left his warmest behind him.</p> + +<p>It made him ashamed to find himself regretting his clothes when he had +lost a mother! Then it pleased him to think that she had his +sovereign, and the wages due since his clothes were paid for. They +would help to give Glum Gunn his own, and set the beasts free from +him! Then he would go back and spend his life with his mother and +Pummy! Poor Pummy! But though Gunn hated him, he was now afraid of him +too; and his fear would be the creature’s protection! He had imagined +it his might that cowed the puma, when it was the animal’s human +gentleness that made him submissive to man: he knew better now! Clare +clasped Abdiel to his bosom, and trudged on. They had gone miles ere +it occurred to him that it might be more comfortable for both if each +carried his individual burden. He set Abdiel down, and the dog ran +vibrating with pleasure. Clare felt himself set down, but with no tail +to wag.</p> + +<p>It was late in the autumn: they could do without supper, but they must +if possible find shelter! A farm-house came in sight. It recalled so +vividly Clare’s early experiences of houselessness, that beasts and +caravans, his mother and Glum Gunn, grew hazy and distant, and the old +time drew so near that he seemed to have waked into it out of a long +dream. They were back in the old misery—a misery in which, however, +his heart had not been pierced as now with the pangs of innocent +creatures unable or unwilling to defend themselves from their natural +guardian! It was long before he learned that for weeks Gunn was unable +to hurt one of them; that his drinking, his late wound, and the blow +Clare had given him, brought on him a severe attack of erysipelas.</p> + +<p>When they reached the farm-yard, Clare knew by the aspect of things +that the cattle were housed and the horses suppered. He crept unseen +into one of the cow-houses: the bodies and breath of the animals would +keep them warm! How sweet the smell seemed to him after that of the +caravans! An empty stall was before him, like a chamber prepared for +his need. He gathered a few straws from under each of the cows, taking +care that not one of them should be the less comfortable, and spread +with them for Abby and himself a thin couch.</p> + +<p>But with the excitement of what had happened, his wonder as to what +would come next, and the hunger that had begun to gnaw at him, Clare +could not sleep. And as he lay awake, thoughts came to him.</p> + +<p>Whence do the thoughts come to us? Of one thing I am sure—that I do +not make or even send for my own thoughts. If some greater one did not +think about us, we should not think about anything. Then what a wonder +is the night! How it works, compelling people to think! Surely somehow +God comes nearer in the night! Clare began to think how helpless he +was. He was not thinking of food and warmth, but of doing things for +the beings he loved. It seemed to him hard that he could but love, and +nothing more. There was his mother! he could do nothing to deliver her +from that villainous brother-in-law! There was Pummy, exposed to the +cruelty of the same evil man! and again he could do nothing for him! +There was Maly! he could do nothing for her—nothing to make her +father and mother glad for her up in the dome of the angels!</p> + +<p>Was it possible that he really could do nothing?</p> + +<p>Then came the thought that people used to say prayers in the days when +he went with his mother to church. He had been taught to say prayers +himself, but had begun to forget them when there was no bed to kneel +beside. What did saying prayers mean? In the Bible-stories people +prayed when they were in trouble and could not help themselves! Did it +matter that he had no church and no bedside? Surely one place must be +as good as another, if it was true that God was everywhere! Surely he +could hear him wherever he spoke! Neither could there be any necessity +for speaking loud! God would hear, however low he spoke! Then he +remembered that God knew the thoughts of his creatures: if so, he +might think a prayer to him; there was no need for any words!</p> + +<p>From the moment of that conclusion, Clare began to pray to God. And +now he prayed the right kind of prayer; that is, his prayers were real +prayers; he asked for what he wanted. To say prayers asking God for +things we do not care about, is to mock him. When we ask for something +we want, it may be a thing God does not care to give us; but he likes +us to speak to him about it. If it is good for us, he will give it us; +if it is not good, he will not give it to us, for it would hurt +us. But Clare only asked God to do what he is always doing: his prayer +was that God would be good to all his mothers, and to his two fathers, +and Mr. Halliwell, and Maly, and Sarah, and his own baby, and +Tommy—and poor Pummy, and would, if Glum Gunn beat him, help him to +bear the blows, and not mind them very much. He ended with something +like this:</p> + +<p>“God, I can’t do anything for anybody! I wish I could! You can get +near them, God: please do something good to every one of them because +I can’t. I think I could go to sleep now, if I were sure you had +listened!”</p> + +<p>Having thus cast all his cares on God, he did go to sleep; and woke in +the morning ready for the new day that arrived with his waking.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LI">Chapter LI.<br><span class="smcap">Clare a true Master.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>It would take a big book to tell all the things of interest that +happened to Clare in the next few weeks. They would be mainly how and +where he found refuge, and how he and Abdiel got things to eat. Verily +they did not live on the fat of the land. Now and then some benevolent +person, seeing him in such evident want, would contrive a job in order +to pay him for it: in one place, although they had no need of him, +certain good people gave him ten days’ work under a gardener, and +dismissed him with twenty shillings in his pocket.</p> + +<p>One way and another, Clare and Abdiel did not die of hunger or of +cold. That is the summary of their history for a good many weeks.</p> + +<p>One night they slept on a common, in the lee of a gypsy tent, and +contrived to get away in the morning without being seen. For Clare +feared they might offer him something stolen, and hunger might +persuade him to ask no questions. Many respectable people will laugh +at the idea of a boy being so particular. Such are immeasurably more +to be pitied than Clare. No one could be hard on a boy who in such +circumstances took what was offered him, but he would not be so honest +as Clare—though he might well be more honest than such as would laugh +at him.</p> + +<p>Another time he went up to a large house, to see if he might not there +get a job. He found the place, for the time at least, abandoned: I +suppose the persons in charge had deserted their post to make +holiday. He lingered about until the evening fell, and then got with +Abdiel under a glass frame in the kitchen-garden. But the glass was so +close to them that Clare feared breaking it; so they got out again, +and lay down on a bench in a shed for potting plants.</p> + +<p>Clare was waked in the morning by a sound cuff on the side of the +head. He got off the bench, took up Abdiel, and coming to himself, +said to the gardener who stood before him in righteous indignation,</p> + +<p>“I’m much obliged to you for my bedroom, sir. It was very cold last +night.”</p> + +<p>His words and respectful manner mollified the gardener a little.</p> + +<p>“You have no business here!” he returned.</p> + +<p>“I know that, sir; but what is a boy to do?” answered Clare. “I wasn’t +hurting anything, and it was so cold we might have died if we had +slept out of doors.”</p> + +<p>“That’s no business of mine!”</p> + +<p>“But it is of mine,” rejoined Clare; “—except you think a boy that +can’t get work ought to commit suicide. If he mustn’t do that, he +can’t always help doing what people with houses don’t like!”</p> + +<p>The gardener was not a bad sort of fellow, and perceived the truth in +what the boy said.</p> + +<p>“That’s always the story!” he replied, however. “Can’t get work! No +idle boy ever could get work! I know the sort of you—well!”</p> + +<p>“Would you mind giving me a chance?” returned Clare eagerly. “I +wouldn’t ask much wages.”</p> + +<p>“You wouldn’t, if you asked what you was worth!”</p> + +<p>“We’d be worth our victuals anyhow!” answered Clare, who always +counted the dog.</p> + +<p>“Who’s we?” asked the man. “Be there a hundred of you?”</p> + +<p>“No; only two. Only me and Abdiel here!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, that beast of a mongrel?”</p> + +<p>The gardener made a stride as if to seize the dog. Clare bounded from +him. The man burst into a mocking laugh.</p> + +<p>“He’s a good dog, indeed, sir!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“You’ll give him the sack before I give you a job.”</p> + +<p>“We’re old friends, sir; we can’t be parted!”</p> + +<p>“I thought as much!” cried the gardener. “They’re always ready to +work, an’ so hungry! But will they part with the mangy dog? Not they! +Hard work and good wages ain’t nowhere beside a mongrel pup! Get out! +Don’t I know the whole ugly bilin’ of ye!”</p> + +<p>Clare turned away with a gentle good-morning, which the man did not +get out of his heart for a matter of two days, and departed, hugging +Abdiel.</p> + +<p>He was often cold and always hungry, but his life was anything but +dull. The man who does not know where his next meal is to come from, +is seldom afflicted with ennui. That is the monopoly of the enviable +with nothing to do, and everything money can get them. A foolish +west-end life has immeasurably more discomfort in it than that of a +street Arab. The ordinary beggar, while in tolerable health, finds far +more enjoyment than most fashionable ladies.</p> + +<p>Thus Clare went wandering long, seeking work, and finding next to +none—all the time upheld by the feeling that something was waiting +for him somewhere, that he was every day drawing nearer to it. Not +once yet had he lost heart. In very virtue of unselfishness and lack +of resentment, he was strong. Not once had he shed a tear for himself, +not once had he pitied his own condition.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LII">Chapter LII.<br><span class="smcap">Miss Tempest.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Without knowing it, he was approaching the sea. Walking along a chain +of downs, he saw suddenly from the top of one of them, for the first +time in his memory though not in his life, the sea—a pale blue cloud, +as it appeared, far on the horizon, between two low hills. The sight +of it, although he did not at first know what it was, brought with it +a strange inexplicable feeling of dolorous pleasure. For this he could +not account. It was the faintest revival of an all but obliterated +impression of something familiar to his childhood, lying somewhere +deeper than the memory, which was a blank in regard to it. But that +feeling was not all that the sight awoke in him. The pale blue cloud +bore to him such a look of the eternal, that it seemed the very place +for God to live in—the solemn, stirless region of calm in which the +being to whom now of late he had first begun in reality to pray, kept +his abode. The hungry, worn, tattered boy, with nothing to call his +own but a great hope and a little dog, fell down on his bare knees on +the hard road, and stretched out his hands in an ecstasy toward the +low cloud.</p> + +<p>The far-off ringing tramp of a horse’s feet aroused him. He rose light +as an athlete, the great hope grown twice its former size, and hunger +forgotten.</p> + +<p>The blue cloud kept in sight, and by and by he knew it was the sea he +saw, though how or at what moment the knowledge came to him he could +not have told. The track was leading him toward one of the principal +southern ports.</p> + +<p>By this time he was again very thin; but he had brown cheeks and clear +eyes, and, save when suffering immediately from hunger, felt perfectly +well. Hunger is a sad thing notwithstanding its deep wholesomeness; +but there is immeasurably more suffering in the world from eating too +much than from eating too little.</p> + +<p>Well able by this time to read the signs of the road, he perceived at +length he must be drawing near a town. He had already passed a house +or two with a little lawn in front, and indications of a garden +behind; and he hoped yet again that here, after all, he might get +work. To door after door he carried his modest request: some doors +were shut in his face almost before he could speak; at others he had a +civil word from maid, or a rough word from man; from none came sound +of assent. It had become harder too to find shelter. Ever as he went, +space was more and more appropriated and enclosed; less and less room +was left for the man for whom had been made no special cubic provision +of earth and air, and who had no money—the most disreputable of +conditions in the eyes of such as would be helpless if they had +none. A rare philosopher for eyes capable of understanding him, he was +a despicable being in the eyes of the common man. To know a human +being one must be human—that is, the divine must be strong in him.</p> + +<p>For some days now, neither Clare nor Abdiel had come even within sight +of food enough to make a meal. The dog was rather thinner than his +master.</p> + +<p>“Abdiel,” said Clare to him one day, “I fear you will soon be a +serpent! Your body gets longer and longer, and your legs get shorter +and shorter: you’ll be crawling presently, rubbing the hair off your +useless little belly on the dusty road! Never mind, Abdiel; you’ll be +a good serpent. Satan was turned into a bad serpent because he was a +bad angel; you will be a good serpent, because you are a good dog! I +hope, however, we shall yet put a stop to the serpent-business!”</p> + +<p>Abdiel wagged his tail, as much as to say, “All right, master!”</p> + +<p>The nights were now very cold; winter was coming fast. Had Clare been +long enough in one place for people to know him, he would never have +been allowed to go so cold and hungry; but he had always to move on, +and nobody had time to learn to care about him. So the terrible +sunless season threatened to wrap him in its winding-sheet, and lay +him down.</p> + +<p>One evening, just before sunset, grown sleepy in spite of the +gathering cold, he sat down on one of the two steep grassy slopes that +bordered the road. His feet were bare now, bare and brown, for his +shoes had come to such plight that it was a relief to throw them away; +but his soles had grown like leather. They rested in the dry shallow +rain-channel, and his body leaned back against the slope. Abdiel, +instead of jumping on the bank and lying in the soft grass, lay down +on the leathery feet, and covered them from the night with his long +faithful body and its coat of tangled hair.</p> + +<p>The sun was shooting his last radiance along the road, and its redness +caressed the sleeping companions, when an elderly lady came to her +gate at the top of the opposite slope, and looked along the road with +the sun. Her reverting glance fell upon the sleepers—the Knight of +Hope lying in rags, not marble, his feet not upon his dog, but his dog +upon his feet. It was a touching picture, and the old lady’s heart was +one easily touched. She looked and saw that the face of the boy, whose +hunger was as plain as his rags, was calm as the wintry sky. She +wondered, but she needed not have wondered; for storm of anger, +drought of greed, nor rotting mist of selfishness, had passed or +rested there, to billow, or score, or waste.</p> + +<p>Her mere glance seemed to wake Abdiel, who took advantage of his +waking to have a lick at the brown, dusty, brave, uncomplaining feet, +so well used to the world’s <i>via dolorosa</i>. She saw, and was touched +yet more by this ministration of the guardian of the feet. Gently +opening the gate, she descended the slope, crossed the road, and stood +silent, regarding the outcasts. No cloudy blanket covered the sky: ere +morning the dew would lie frozen on the grass!</p> + +<p>“You shouldn’t be sleeping there!” she said.</p> + +<p>Abdiel started to his four feet and would have snarled, but with one +look at the lady changed his mind. Clare half awoke, half sat up, made +an inarticulate murmur, and fell back again.</p> + +<p>“Get up, my boy,” said the old lady. “You must indeed!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, please, ma’am, must I?” answered Clare, slowly rising to his +feet. “I had but just lain down, and I’m so tired!—If I mayn’t sleep +<i>there</i>,” he continued, “where <i>am</i> I to sleep?—Please, ma’am, why is +everybody so set against letting a boy sleep? It don’t cost them +anything! I can understand not giving him work, if he looks too much +in want of it; but why should they count it bad of him to lie down and +sleep?”</p> + +<p>The lady wisely let him talk; not until he stopped did she answer him.</p> + +<p>“It’s because of the frost, my boy!” she said. “It would be the death +of you to sleep out of doors to-night!”</p> + +<p>“It’s a nice place for it, ma’am!”</p> + +<p>“To sleep in? Certainly not!”</p> + +<p>“I didn’t mean that, ma’am. I meant a nice place to go away from—to +die in, ma’am!”</p> + +<p>“That is not ours to choose,” answered the old lady severely, but the +tone of her severity trembled.</p> + +<p>“I sha’n’t find anywhere so nice as this bank,” said Clare, turning +and looking at it sorrowfully.</p> + +<p>“There are plenty of places in the town. It’s but a mile farther on!”</p> + +<p>“But this is so much nicer, ma’am! And I’ve no money—none at all, +ma’am. When I came out of prison,—”</p> + +<p>“Came out of <i>where</i>?”</p> + +<p>“Out of prison, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>He had never been in prison in a legal sense, never having been +convicted of anything; but he did not know the difference between +detention and imprisonment.</p> + +<p>“Prison!” she exclaimed, holding up her hands in horror. “How dare you +mention prison!”</p> + +<p>“Because I was in it, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>“And to say it so coolly too! Are you not ashamed of yourself?”</p> + +<p>“No, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>“It’s a shame to have been in prison.”</p> + +<p>“Not if I didn’t do anything wrong.”</p> + +<p>“Nobody will believe that, I’m afraid!”</p> + +<p>“I suppose not, ma’am! I used to feel very angry when people wouldn’t +believe me, but now I see they are not to blame. And now I’ve got used +to it, and it don’t hurt so much.—But,” he added with a sigh, “the +worst of it is, they won’t give me any work!”</p> + +<p>“Do you always tell people you’ve come out of prison?”</p> + +<p>“Yes, ma’am, when I think of it.”</p> + +<p>“Then you can’t wonder they won’t give you work!”</p> + +<p>“I don’t, ma’am—not now. It seems a law of the universe!”</p> + +<p>“Not of the universe, I think—but of this world—perhaps!” said the +old lady thoughtfully.</p> + +<p>“But there’s one thing I do wonder at,” said Clare. “When I say I’ve +been in prison, they believe me; but when I say I haven’t done +anything wrong, then they mock me, and seem quite amused at being +expected to believe that. I can’t get at it!”</p> + +<p>“I daresay! But people will always believe you against yourself.—What +are you going to do, then, if nobody will give you work? You can’t +starve!”</p> + +<p>“Indeed I <i>can</i>, ma’am! It’s just the one thing I’ve got to do. We’ve +been pretty near the last of it sometimes—me and Abdiel! Haven’t we, +Abby?”</p> + +<p>The dog wagged his tail, and the old lady turned aside to control her +feelings.</p> + +<p>“Don’t cry, ma’am,” said Clare; “I don’t mind it—not <i>much</i>. I’m too +glad I didn’t <i>do</i> anything, to mind it much! Why should I! Ought I to +mind it much, ma’am? Jesus Christ hadn’t done anything, and they +killed <i>him</i>! I don’t fancy it’s so very bad to die of only hunger! +But we’ll soon see!—Sha’n’t we, Abby?”</p> + +<p>Again the dog wagged his tail.</p> + +<p>“If you didn’t do anything wrong, what <i>did</i> you do?” said the old +lady, almost at her wits’ end.</p> + +<p>“I don’t like telling things that are not going to be believed. It’s +like washing your face with ink!”</p> + +<p>“I will <i>try</i> to believe you.”</p> + +<p>“Then I will tell you; for you speak the truth, ma’am, and so, +perhaps, will be able to believe the truth!”</p> + +<p>“How do you know I speak the truth?”</p> + +<p>“Because you didn’t say, ‘I will believe you.’ Nobody can be sure of +doing that. But you can be sure of <i>trying</i>; and you said, ‘I will +<i>try</i> to believe you.’”</p> + +<p>“Tell me all about it then.”</p> + +<p>“I will, ma’am.—The policeman came in the middle of the night when we +were asleep, and took us all away, because we were in a house that was +not ours.”</p> + +<p>“Whose was it then?”</p> + +<p>“Nobody knew. It was what they call in chancery. There was nobody in +it but moths and flies and spiders and rats;—though I think the rats +only came to eat baby.”</p> + +<p>“Baby! Then the whole family of you, father, mother, and all, were +taken to prison!”</p> + +<p>“No, ma’am; my fathers and my mothers were taken up into the dome of +the angels.”—What with hunger and sleepiness, Clare was talking like +a child.—“I haven’t any father and mother in this world. I have two +fathers and two mothers up there, and one mother in this world. She’s +the mother of the wild beasts.”</p> + +<p>The old lady began to doubt the boy’s sanity, but she went on +questioning him.</p> + +<p>“How did you have a baby with you, then?”</p> + +<p>“The baby was my own, ma’am. I took her out of the water-butt.”</p> + +<p>Once more Clare had to tell his story—from the time, that is, when +his adoptive father and mother died. He told it in such a simple +matter-of-fact way, yet with such quaint remarks, from their very +simplicity difficult to understand, that, if the old lady, for all her +trying, was not able quite to believe his tale, it was because she +doubted whether the boy was not one of God’s innocents, with an +angel-haunted brain.</p> + +<p>“And what’s become of Tommy?” she asked.</p> + +<p>“He’s in the same workhouse with baby. I’m very glad; for what I +should have done with Tommy, and nothing to give him to eat, I can’t +think. He would have been sure to steal! I couldn’t have kept him from +it!”</p> + +<p>“You must be more careful of your company.”</p> + +<p>“Please, ma’am, I was very careful of Tommy. He had the best company I +could give him: I did try to be better for Tommy’s sake. But my trying +wasn’t much use to Tommy, so long as he wouldn’t try! He was a little +better, though, I think; and if I had him now, and could give him +plenty to eat, and had baby as well as Abdiel to help me, we might +make something of Tommy, I think.—<i>You</i> think so—don’t you, Abdiel?”</p> + +<p>The dog, who had stood looking in his master’s face all the time he +spoke, wagged his tail faster.</p> + +<p>“What a name to give a dog! Where did you find it?”</p> + +<p>“In Paradise Lost, ma’am. Abdiel was the one angel, you remember, +ma’am, who, when he saw what Satan was up to, left him, and went back +to his duty.”</p> + +<p>“And what was his duty?”</p> + +<p>“Why of course to do what God told him. I love Abdiel, and because I +love the little dog and he took care of baby, I call him Abdiel +too. Heaven is so far off that it makes no confusion to have the same +name.”</p> + +<p>“But how dare you give the name of an angel to a dog?”</p> + +<p>“To a <i>good</i> dog, ma’am! A good dog is good enough to go with any +angel—at his heels of course! If he had been a bad dog, it would have +been wicked to name him after a good angel. If the dog had been +Tommy—I mean if Tommy had been the dog, I should have had to call him +Moloch, or Belzebub! God made the angels and the dogs; and if the dogs +are good, God loves them.—Don’t he, Abdiel?”</p> + +<p>Abdiel assented after his usual fashion. The lady said nothing. Clare +went on.</p> + +<p>“Abdiel won’t mind—the angel Abdiel, I mean, ma’am—he won’t mind +lending his name to my friend. The dog will have a name of his own, +perhaps, some day—like the rest of us!”</p> + +<p>“What is <i>your</i> name?”</p> + +<p>“The name I have now is, like the dog’s, a borrowed one. I shall get +my own one day—not here—but there—when—when—I’m hungry enough to +go and find it.”</p> + +<p>Clare had grown very white. He sat down, and lay back on the grass. He +had talked more in those few minutes than for weeks, and want had made +him weak. He felt very faint. The dog jumped up, and fell to licking +his face.</p> + +<p>“What a wicked old woman I am!” said the lady to herself, and ran +across the road like some little long-legged bird, and climbed the +bank swiftly.</p> + +<p>She disappeared within the gate, but to return presently with a +tumbler of milk and a huge piece of bread.</p> + +<p>“Here, boy!” she cried; “here is medicine for you! Make haste and take +it.”</p> + +<p>Clare sat up feebly, and stared at the tumbler for a moment. Either he +could hardly believe his eyes, or was too sick to take it at +once. When he had it in his hand, he held it out to the dog.</p> + +<p>“Here, Abdiel, have a little,” he said.</p> + +<p>This offended the old lady.</p> + +<p>“You’re never going to give the dog that good milk!” she cried.</p> + +<p>“A little of it, please, ma’am!”</p> + +<p>“—And feed him out of the tumbler too?”</p> + +<p>“He’s had nothing to-day, ma’am, and we’re comrades!”</p> + +<p>“But it’s not clean of you!”</p> + +<p>“Ah, you don’t know dogs, ma’am! His tongue is clean—as clean as +anybody’s.”</p> + +<p>Abdiel took three or four little laps of the milk, drew away, and +looked up at his master—as much as to say, “You, now!”</p> + +<p>“Besides,” Clare went on, “he couldn’t get at it so well in the bottom +of the tumbler.”</p> + +<p>With that he raised it to his own lips, drank eagerly, and set it on +the road half empty, looking his thanks to the giver with a smile she +thought heavenly. Then he broke the bread, and giving the dog nearly +the half of it, began to eat the rest himself. The old lady stood +looking on in silence, pondering what she was to do with the celestial +beggar.</p> + +<p>“Would you mind sleeping in the greenhouse, if I had a bed put up for +you?” she said at length, in tone apologetic.</p> + +<p>“This is a better place—though I wish it was warmer!” said Clare, +with another smile as he looked up at the sky, in which a few stars +were beginning to twinkle, and thought of the gardeners he had +met. “—Don’t you think it better, ma’am?”</p> + +<p>“No, indeed, I don’t!” she answered crossly; for to her the open air +at night seemed wrong, disreputable. There was something unholy in it!</p> + +<p>“I would rather stay here,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“Why?”</p> + +<p>“Because you don’t quite believe me, ma’am. You can’t; and you can’t +help it. You wouldn’t be able to sleep for thinking that a boy just +out of prison was lying in the greenhouse. There would be no saying +what he might not do! I once read in a newspaper how an old lady took +a lad into her house for a servant, and he murdered her!—No, ma’am, +thank you! After such a supper we shall sleep beautifully!—Sha’n’t +we, Abby? And then, perhaps, you could give me a job in the garden +to-morrow! I daresay the gardener wants a little help sometimes! But +if he knew me to have slept in the greenhouse, he would hate me.”</p> + +<p>The old lady said nothing, for, like most old ladies, she feared her +gardener. She took the tumbler from the boy’s hand, and went into the +house. But in two minutes she came again, with another great piece of +bread for Clare, and a bone with something on it which she threw to +Abdiel. The dog’s ears started up, erect and alive, like individual +creatures, and his eyes gleamed; but he looked at his master, and +would not touch the bone without his leave—which given, he fell upon +it, and worried it as if it had been a rat.</p> + +<p>Clare was now himself again, and when the old lady left them for the +third time, he walked with her across the way, bread in hand, to open +the gate for her. When she was inside, he took off his cap, and bade +her good-night with a grace that won all that was left to be won of +her heart.</p> + +<p>Before she had taken three steps from the gate, the old lady turned.</p> + +<p>“Boy!” she called; and Clare, who was making for his couch under the +stars, hastened back at the sound of her voice.</p> + +<p>“I shall not be able to sleep,” she said, “for thinking of you out +there in the bleak night!”</p> + +<p>“I am used to it, ma’am!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, I daresay! but you see I’m not! and I don’t like the thought of +it! You may like hoarfrost-sheets, for what I know, but I don’t! You +may like the stars for a tester—because you want to die and go to +them, I suppose!—but I have no fancy for the stars! You are a foolish +fellow, and I am out of temper with you. You don’t give a thought to +me—or to my feelings if you should die! I should never go to bed +again with a good conscience!—Besides, I should have to nurse you!”</p> + +<p>The last member of her expostulation was hardly in logical sequence, +but it had not the less influence on Clare for that.</p> + +<p>“I will do whatever you please, ma’am,” he answered humbly. “—Come, +Abdiel!”</p> + +<p>The dog came running across the road with his bone in his mouth.</p> + +<p>“You mustn’t bring that inside the gate, Ab!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>The dog dropped it.</p> + +<p>“Good dog! It’s a lady’s garden, you know, Abdiel!” Then turning to +his hostess, Clare added, “I always tell him when I’m pleased with +him: don’t you think it right, ma’am?”</p> + +<p>“I daresay! I don’t know anything about dogs.”</p> + +<p>“If you had a dog like Abdiel, he would soon teach you dogs, ma’am!” +rejoined Clare.</p> + +<p>By this time they were at the house-door. The lady told him to wait +there, went in, and had a talk with her two maids. In half an hour, +Clare and his four-footed angel were asleep—in an outhouse, it is +true, but in a comfortable bed, such as they had not seen since their +flight from the caravans. The cold breeze wandered moaning like a lost +thing round the bare walls, as if every time it woke, it went abroad +to see if there was any hope for the world; but it did not touch them; +and if through their ears it got into their dreams, it made their +sleep the sweeter, and their sense of refuge the deeper.</p> + +<p>But although the bewitching boy and his good dog were not lying in the +open air over against her gate, and although never a thought of murder +or theft came to trouble her, it was long before the old lady found +repose. Her heart had been deeply touched.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LIII">Chapter LIII.<br><span class="smcap">The Gardener.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>From the fact that his hostess made him no answer when he breathed the +hope of a job in her garden, Clare concluded that he had presumed in +suggesting the thing to her, and that she would be relieved by their +departure. When he woke in the morning, therefore, early after a grand +sleep, he felt he had no right to linger: he had been invited to +sleep, and he had slept! He also shrank from the idea of being +supposed to expect his breakfast before he went. So, as soon as he got +up, he walked out of the gate, crossed the road, and sat down on the +spot he had occupied the night before, there to wait until the house +should be astir. For, although he could not linger within gates where +he was unknown, neither could he slink away without morning-thanks for +the gift of a warm night.</p> + +<p>As he sat, he grew drowsy, and leaning back, fell fast asleep.</p> + +<p>The thoughts of his hostess had been running on very different lines, +and she woke with feelings concerning the pauper very different from +those the pauper imagined in her. She must do something for him; she +must give or get him work! As to giving him work, her difficulty lay +in the gardener. She resolved, however, to attempt over-coming it.</p> + +<p>She rose earlier than usual, therefore, and as the man, who did not +sleep in the house, was not yet come, she went down to the gate to +meet him and have the thing over—so eager was she, and so nervous in +prospect of such an interview with her dreaded servant.</p> + +<p>“Good gracious!” she murmured aloud, “does it rain beggars?” For +there, on the same spot, lay another beggar, another boy, with a dog +in his bosom the facsimile of the ugly white thing named after +Milton’s angel! She did not feel moved to go and make his +acquaintance. It could not be another of the family, could it? that +had already heard of his brother’s good luck, and come to see whether +there might not be a picking for him too! She turned away hurriedly +lest he should wake, and went back to the house.</p> + +<p>But looking behind her as she mounted the steps, she caught sight of +the gardener at the other gate, casting a displeased look across the +road before he entered: he did not like to see tramps about! Her heart +sank a little, but she was not to be turned aside.</p> + +<p>The gardener came in, and his mistress joined him and walked with him +to his work, telling him as much as she thought fit concerning the +boy, and interspersing her narrative with hints of the duty of giving +every one a chance. She took care not to mention that he had come out +of a prison somewhere.</p> + +<p>“No one should be driven to despair,” she said, little thinking she +used almost the very words of the Lord, according to the Sinaitic +reading of a passage in St. Luke’s gospel.</p> + +<p>The argument had little force with the rough Scotchman: his mistress +was soft-hearted! He shook his head ominously at the idea of giving a +tramp the chance of doing decent work, but at last consented, with a +show of being over-persuaded to an imprudent action, to let the boy +help him for a day, and see how he got on, stipulating, however, that +he should not be supposed to have pledged himself to anything.</p> + +<p>Miss Tempest’s plans went beyond the gardener’s scope. She had for +some months been inclined to have a boy to help in the house—an +inclination justified by a late unexpected accession of income: if +this boy were what he seemed, he would make a more than valuable +servant; and nothing could clear her judgment of him better, she +thought, than putting him to the test of a brief subjection to the +cross-grained, exacting Scotchman. By that she would soon know whether +to dismiss him, or venture with him farther!</p> + +<p>She had but just wrung his hard consent from the gardener, when the +cook came running, to say the boy was gone. Upon poor Miss Tempest’s +heart fell a cold avalanche.</p> + +<p>“But we’ve counted the spoons, ma’am, and they’re all right!” said the +cook.</p> + +<p>This additional statement, however, did not seem to give much +consolation to the benevolent old lady. She stood for a moment with +her eyes on the ground, too pained to move or speak. Then she started, +and ran to the gate. The cook ran after, thinking her mistress gone +out of her mind—and was sure of it when she saw her open the gate, +and run straight down the bank to the road. But when she reached the +gate herself, she saw her standing over a boy asleep on the grass of +the opposite bank.</p> + +<p>Abdiel, lying on his bosom, watched her with keen friendly eyes. Clare +was dreaming some agreeable morning-dream; for a smile of such +pleasure as could haunt only an innocent face, nickered on it like a +sunny ripple on the still water of a pool.</p> + +<p>“No!” said Miss Tempest to herself; “there’s no duplicity there! +Otherwise, a tree is not known by its fruit!”</p> + +<p>Clare opened his eyes, and started lightly to his feet, strong and +refreshed.</p> + +<p>“Good morning, ma’am!” he said, pulling off his cap.</p> + +<p>“Good morning—what am I to call you?” she returned.</p> + +<p>“Clare, if you please, ma’am.”</p> + +<p>“What is your Christian name?”</p> + +<p>“That is my Christian name, ma’am—Clare.”</p> + +<p>“Then what is your surname?”</p> + +<p>“I am called Porson, ma’am, but I have another name. Mr. Porson +adopted me.”</p> + +<p>“What is your other name?”</p> + +<p>“I don’t know, ma’am. I am going to know one day, I think; but the day +is not come yet.”</p> + +<p>He told her all he could about his adoptive parents, and little Maly; +but the time before he went to the farm was growing strangely +dreamlike, as if it had sunk a long way down in the dark waters of the +past—all up to the hour when Maly was carried away by the long black +aunt.</p> + +<p>The story accounted to Miss Tempest both for his good speech and the +name of his dog. The adopted child of a clergyman might well be +acquainted with <i>Paradise Lost</i>, though she herself had never read +more of it than the apostrophe to Light in the beginning of the third +book! That she had learned at school without understanding phrase or +sentence of it; while Clare never left passage alone until he +understood it, or, failing that, had invented a meaning for it.</p> + +<p>“Well, then, Clare, I’ve been talking to my gardener about you,” said +Miss Tempest. “He will give you a job.”</p> + +<p>“God bless you, ma’am! I’m ready!” cried Clare, stretching out his +arms, as if to get them to the proper length for work. “Where shall I +find him?”</p> + +<p>“You must have breakfast first.”</p> + +<p>She led the way to the kitchen.</p> + +<p>The cook, a middle-aged woman, looked at the dog, and her face +puckered all over with points of interrogation and exclamation.</p> + +<p>“Please, cook, will you give this young man some breakfast? He wanted +to go to work without any, but that wouldn’t do—would it, cook?” said +her mistress.</p> + +<p>“I hope the dog won’t be running in and out of my kitchen all day, +ma’am!”</p> + +<p>“No fear of that, cook!” said Clare; “he never leaves me.”</p> + +<p>“Then I don’t think—I’m afraid,” she began, and stopped. “—But +that’s none of my business,” she added. “John will look after his +own—and more!”</p> + +<p>Miss Tempest said nothing, but she almost trembled; for John, she +knew, had a perfect hatred of dogs. Nor could anyone wonder, for, gate +open or gate shut, in they came and ran over his beds. She dared not +interfere! He and Clare must settle the question of Abdiel or no +Abdiel between them! She left the kitchen.</p> + +<p>The cook threw the dog a crust of bread, and Abdiel, after a look at +his master, fell upon it with his white, hungry little teeth. Then she +proceeded to make a cup of coffee for Clare, casting an occasional +glance of pity at his garments, so miserably worn and rent, and his +brown bare feet.</p> + +<p>“How on the face of this blessed world, boy, do you expect to work in +the garden without shoes?” she said at length.</p> + +<p>“Most things I can do well enough without them,” answered Clare; +“—even digging, if the ground is not very hard. My feet used to be +soft, but now the soles of them are like leather.—They’ve grown their +own shoes,” he added, with a smile, and looked straight in her eyes.</p> + +<p>The smile and the look went far to win her heart, as they had won that +of her mistress: she felt them true, and wondered how such a +fair-spoken, sweet-faced boy could be on the tramp. She poured him out +a huge cup of coffee, fried him a piece of bacon, and cut him as much +bread and butter as he could dispose of. He had not often eaten +anything but dry bread, in general very dry, since he left the +menagerie, and now felt feasted like an emperor. Pleased with the +master, the cook fed the dog with equal liberality; and then, curious +to witness their reception by John, between whom and herself was +continuous feud, she conducted Clare to the gardener. From a distance +he saw them coming. With look irate fixed upon the dog, he started to +meet them. Clare knew too well the meaning of that look, and saw in +him Satan regarding Abdiel with eye of fire, and the words on his +lips—</p> +<p class="poetry"> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">“And fly, ere evil intercept thy flight.”</span><br></p> + +<p>The moment he came near enough, without word, or show of malice beyond +what lay in his eye, he made, with the sharp hoe he carried, a sudden +downstroke at the faithful angel, thinking to serve him as Gabriel +served Moloch. But Abdiel was too quick for him: he had read danger in +his very gait the moment he saw him move, and enmity in his eyes when +he came nearer. He kept therefore his own eyes on the hoe, and never +moved until the moment of attack. Then he darted aside. The weapon +therefore came down on the hard gravel, jarring the arm of his +treacherous enemy. With a muttered curse John followed him and made +another attempt, which Abdiel in like manner eluded. John followed and +followed; Abdiel fled and fled—never farther than a few yards, +seeming almost to entice the man’s pursuit, sometimes pirouetting on +his hind legs to escape the blows which the gardener, growing more and +more furious with failure, went on aiming at him. Fruitlessly did +Clare assure him that neither would the dog do any harm, nor allow any +one to hit him. It was from very weariness that at last he desisted, +and wiping his forehead with his shirt-sleeve, turned upon Clare in +the smothered wrath that knows itself ridiculous. For all the time the +cook stood by, shaking with delighted laughter at his every fresh +discomfiture.</p> + +<figure class="figcenter illowp48" id="007" style="max-width: 40em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/007.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">The gardener’s discomfiture.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>“Awa’, ye deil’s buckie,” he cried, “an tak’ the little Sawtan wi’ ye! +Dinna lat me see yer face again.”</p> + +<p>“But the lady told me you would give me a job!” said Clare.</p> + +<p>“I didna tell her I wad gie yer tyke a job! I wad though, gien he wad +lat me!”</p> + +<p>“He’s given you a stiff one!” said the cook, and laughed again.</p> + +<p>The gardener took no notice of her remark.</p> + +<p>“Awa’ wi’ ye!” he cried again, yet more wrathfully, “—or—”</p> + +<p>He raised his hand.</p> + +<p>Clare looked in his eyes and did not budge.</p> + +<p>“For shame, John!” expostulated the cook. “Would you strike a child?”</p> + +<p>“I’m no child, cook!” said Clare. “He can’t hurt me much. I’ve had a +good breakfast!”</p> + +<p>“Lat ’im tak’ awa’ that deevil o’ a tyke o’ his, as I tauld him,” +thundered the gardener, “or I’ll mak’ a pulp o’ ’im!”</p> + +<p>“I’ve had such a breakfast, sir, as I’m bound to give a whole day’s +work in return for,” said Clare, looking up at the angry man; “and I +won’t stir till I’ve done it. Stolen food on my stomach would turn me +sick!”</p> + +<p>“Gien it did, it wadna be the first time, I reckon!” said the +gardener.</p> + +<p>“It <i>would</i> be the first time!” returned Clare. “You are very rude.—If +Abdiel understood Scotch, he would bite you,” he added, as the dog, +hearing his master speak angrily, came up, ears erect, and took his +place at his side, ready for combat.</p> + +<p>“Ye’ll hae to tak’ some ither mode o’ payin’ the debt!” said John. +“Stick spaud in yird here, ye sall not! You or I maun flit first!”</p> + +<p>With that he walked slowly away, shouldering his hoe.</p> + +<p>“Come, Abdiel,” said Clare; “we must go and tell Miss Tempest! Perhaps +she’ll find something else for us to do. If she can’t, she’ll forgive +us our breakfast, and we’ll be off on the tramp again. I thought we +were going to have a day’s rest—I mean work; that’s the rest we want! +But this man is an enemy to the poor.”</p> + +<p>The gardener half turned, as if he would speak, but changed his mind +and went his way.</p> + +<p>“Never mind John!” said the cook, loud enough for John to hear. “He’s +an old curmudgeon as can’t sleep o’ nights for quarrellin’ inside +him. I’ll go to mis’ess, and you go and sit down in the kitchen till I +come to you.”</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LIV">Chapter LIV.<br><span class="smcap">The Kitchen.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Clare went into the kitchen, and sat down. The housemaid came in, and +stood for a moment looking at him. Then she asked him what he wanted +there.</p> + +<p>“Cook told me to wait here,” he answered.</p> + +<p>“Wait for what?”</p> + +<p>“Till she came to me. She’s gone to speak to Miss Tempest.”</p> + +<p>“I won’t have that dog here.”</p> + +<p>“When I had a home,” remarked Clare, “our servant said the cook was +queen of the kitchen: I don’t want to be rude, ma’am, but I must do as +she told me.”</p> + +<p>“She never told you to bring that mangy animal in here!”</p> + +<p>“She knew he would follow me, and she said nothing about him. But he’s +not mangy. He hasn’t enough to eat to be mangy. He’s as lean as a +dried fish!”</p> + +<p>The housemaid, being fat, was inclined to think the remark personal; +but Clare looked up at her with such clear, honest, simple eyes, that +she forgot the notion, and thought what a wonderfully nice boy he +looked.</p> + +<p>“He’s shamefully poor, though! His clothes ain’t even decent!” she +remarked to herself.</p> + +<p>And certainly the white skin did look through in several places.</p> + +<p>“You won’t let him put his nose in anything, will you?” she said quite +gently, returning his smile with a very pleasant one of her own.</p> + +<p>“Abdiel is too much of a gentleman to do it,” he answered.</p> + +<p>“A dog a gentleman!” rejoined the housemaid with a merry laugh, +willing to draw him out.</p> + +<p>“Abdiel can be hungry and not greedy,” answered Clare, and the young +woman was silent.</p> + +<p>Miss Tempest and Mrs. Mereweather had all this time been turning over +the question of what was to be done with the strange boy. They agreed +it was too bad that anyone willing to work should be prevented from +earning even a day’s victuals by the bad temper of a gardener. But his +mistress did not want to send the man away. She had found him +scrupulously honest, as is many a bad-tempered man, and she did not +like changes. The cook on her part had taken such a fancy to Clare +that she did not want him set to garden-work; she would have him at +once into the house, and begin training him for a page. Now Miss +Tempest was greatly desiring the same thing, but in dread of what the +cook would say, and was delighted, therefore, when the first +suggestion of it came from Mrs. Mereweather herself. The only obstacle +in the cook’s eyes was that same long, spectral dog. The boy could not +be such a fool, however,—she said, not being a lover of animals—as +let a wretched beast like that come betwixt him and a good situation!</p> + +<p>“It’s all right, Clare,” said Mrs. Mereweather, entering her queendom +so radiant within that she could not repress the outshine of her +pleasure. “Mis’ess an’ me, we’ve arranged it all. You’re to help me in +the kitchen; an’ if you can do what you’re told, an’ are willin’ to +learn, we’ll soon get you out of your troubles. There’s but one thing +in the way.”</p> + +<p>“What is it, please?” asked Clare.</p> + +<p>“The dog, of course! You must part with the dog.”</p> + +<p>“That I cannot do,” returned Clare quietly, but with countenance +fallen and sorrowful. “—Come, Abdiel!”</p> + +<p>The dog started up, every hair of him full of electric vitality.</p> + +<p>“You don’t mean you’re going to walk yourself off in such a beastly +ungrateful fashion—an’ all for a miserable cur!” exclaimed the cook.</p> + +<p>“The lady has been most kind to us, and we’re grateful to her, and +ready to work for her if she will let us;—ain’t we, Abdiel? But +Abdiel has done far more for me than Miss Tempest! To part with +Abdiel, and leave him to starve, or get into bad company, would be +sheer ingratitude. I should be a creature such as Miss Tempest ought +to have nothing to do with: I might serve her as that young butler I +told her of! It’s just as bad to be ungrateful to a dog as to any +other person. Besides, he wouldn’t leave me. He would be always +hanging about.”</p> + +<p>“John would soon knock him on the head.”</p> + +<p>“Would he, Abdiel?” said Clare.</p> + +<p>The dog looked up in his master’s face with such a comical answer in +his own, that the cook burst out laughing, and began to like Abdiel.</p> + +<p>“But you don’t really mean to say,” she persisted, “that you’d go off +again on the tramp, to be as cold and hungry again to-morrow as you +were yesterday—and all for the sake of a dog? A dog ain’t a +Christian!”</p> + +<p>“Abdiel’s more of a Christian than some I know,” answered Clare: “he +does what his master tells him.”</p> + +<p>“There’s something in that!” said the cook.</p> + +<p>“If I parted with Abdiel, I could never hold up my head among the +angels,” insisted Clare. “Think what harm it might do him! He could +trust nobody after, his goodness might give way! He might grow worse +than Tommy!—No; I’ve got to take care of Abdiel, and Abdiel’s got to +take care of me!—Ain’t you, Abby?”</p> + +<p>“We can’t have him here in the kitchen nohow!” said the cook in +relenting tone.</p> + +<p>“Poor fellow!” said the housemaid kindly.</p> + +<p>The dog turned to her and wagged his tail.</p> + +<p>“What wouldn’t I give for a lover like that!” said the housemaid—but +whether of Clare or the dog I cannot say.</p> + +<p>“I know what I shall do!” cried Clare, in sudden resolve. “I will ask +Miss Tempest to have him up-stairs with her, and when she is tired of +either of us, we will go away together.”</p> + +<p>“A probable thing!” returned the cook. “A lady like Miss Tempest with +a dog like that about her! She’d be eaten up alive with fleas! In ten +minutes she would!”</p> + +<p>“No fear of that!” rejoined Clare. “Abdiel catches all his <i>own</i> +fleas!—Don’t you, Abby?”</p> + +<p>The dog instantly began to burrow in his fell of hair—an answer which +might be taken either of two ways: it might indicate comprehension and +corroboration of his master, or the necessity for a fresh hunt. The +women laughed, much amused.</p> + +<p>“Look here!” said Clare. “Let me have a tub of water—warm, if you +please—he likes that: I tried him once, passing a factory, where a +lot of it was running to waste. Then, with the help of a bit of soap, +I’ll show you a body of hair to astonish you.”</p> + +<p>“What breed is he?” asked the housemaid.</p> + +<p>“He’s all the true breeds under the sun, I fancy,” returned his +master; “but the most of him seems of the sky-blue terrier sort.”</p> + +<p>The more they talked with Clare, the better the women liked him. They +got him a tub and plenty of warm water. Abdiel was nothing loath to be +plunged in, and Clare washed him thoroughly. Taken out and dried, he +seemed no more for a lady’s chamber unmeet.</p> + +<p>“Now,” said Clare, “will you please ask Miss Tempest if I may bring +him on to the lawn, and show her some of his tricks?”</p> + +<p>The good lady was much pleased with the cleverness and instant +obedience of the little animal. Clare proposed that she should keep +him by her.</p> + +<p>“But will he stay with me? and will he do what <i>I</i> tell him?” she +asked.</p> + +<p>Clare took the dog aside, and talked to him. He told him what he was +going to do, and what he expected of him. How much Abdiel understood, +who can tell! but when his master laid him down at Miss Tempest’s +feet, there he lay; and when Clare went with the cook, he did not +move, though he cast many a wistful glance after the lord of his +heart. When his new mistress went into the house, he followed her +submissively, his head hanging, and his tail motionless. He soon +recovered his cheerfulness, however, and seemed to know that his +friend had not abandoned him.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LV">Chapter LV.<br><span class="smcap">The Wheel rests for a Time.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>That part of the human race which is fond of dolls, may now imagine +the pleasure of the cook in going to the town in the omnibus to buy +everything for a live doll so big as Clare! In a very few days she had +him dressed to her heart’s content, and the satisfaction of her +mistress, who would not have him in livery, but in a plain suit of +dark blue cloth: for she loved blue, all her men-people being, or +having been in the navy. Thus dressed, he looked as much of a +gentleman as before: his look of refinement had owed nothing to the +contrast of his rags. Better clothes make not a few seem commoner.</p> + +<p>When Mrs. Mereweather came back from the town the first day, she found +that the ragged boy had got her kitchen and scullery as nice and +clean, and everything as ready to her hand, as if she had got her work +done before she went, which the omnibus would not permit. This +rejoiced her much; but being a woman of experience, she continued a +little anxious lest his sweet ways should go after his rags, lest his +new garments should breed bumptiousness and bad manners. For such a +change is no unfrequent result of prosperity. But such had been +Mr. Porson’s teaching and example, such Mrs. Porson’s management, and +such the responsiveness of the boy’s disposition, that the thought +never came to him whether this or that was a thing fit for him to do: +if the thing was a right thing, and had to be done, why should not he +do it as well as another! To earn his own and Abdiel’s bread, he would +do anything honest, setting up his back at nothing. But when about a +thing, he forgot even his obligation to do it, in the glad endeavour +to do it well.</p> + +<p>As the days went on, Mrs. Mereweather was not once disappointed in +him. He did everything with such a will that both she and the +housemaid were always ready to spare and help him. Very soon they +began to grow tender over him; and on pretence of his being the +earlier drest to open the door, did certain things themselves which he +had been quite content to do, but which they did not like seeing him +do. Many—I am afraid most boys would have presumed on their +generosity, but Clare was nowise injured by it.</p> + +<p>Nothing could be kinder than the way his mistress treated him. Having +lent him some books, and at once perceived that he was careful of +them, she let him have the run of her library when his day’s work was +over. For he not only read but respected books. Nothing shows +vulgarity more than the way in which some people treat books. No +gentleman would write his remarks on the margins of another person’s +book; no lady would brush her hair as she read one of her own.</p> + +<p>From hungry days and cold nights, Clare and Abdiel found themselves +<i>in clover</i>—the phrase surely of some lover of cows!—and they were +more than content. Clare had longed so much for work, and had for so +many a weary day sought it in vain, that he valued it now just because +it was work. And he seemed to know instinctively that a man ranks, not +according to the thing he does, but according to the way he does +it. In life it is far higher to do an inferior thing well than to do a +superior thing passably.</p> + +<p>Clare made good use of his privileges, and read much, educating +himself none the worse that he did it unconsciously. He read whatever +came in his way. He read really—not as most people read, leaving the +sentences behind them like so many unbroken nuts, the kernel of whose +meaning they have not seen. He learned more than most boys at school, +more even than most young men at college; for it is not what one +knows, but what one uses, that is the true measure of learning. +Whatever he read, he read from the point of practice. In history or +romance he saw—not merely what a man ought to be or do, but what he +himself must, at that moment, be or do. There is a very common sort of +man calling himself practical, but neglecting to practise the most +important things, who would laugh at the idea of Clare being +practical, seeing he did not trouble his head about money, or “getting +on in the world”—what servants call “bettering themselves;” but such +a practical man will find he has been but a practical fool. Clare took +heed to do what was right, and grow a better man. Such a life is the +only really practical one.</p> + +<p>People wondered how Miss Tempest had managed to get hold of such a +nice-looking page, and the good lady was flattered by their +wonder. But she knew the world too well to be sure of him yet. She +knew that it is difficult, in the human tree, to distinguish between +blossom and fruit. Deeds of lovely impulse are the blossom; unvarying, +determined Tightness is the fruit.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LVI">Chapter LVI.<br><span class="smcap">Strategy.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Miss Tempest was the last of an old family, with scarce a relation, +and no near one, in the world. Hence the pieces of personal property +that had continued in the possession of various branches of the family +after land and money, through fault or misfortune, were gone, had +mostly drifted into the small pool of Miss Tempest’s life now slowly +sinking in the sands of time, there to gleam and sparkle out their +tale of its old splendour. She did not think often of their +money-worth: had she done so, she would have kept them at her +banker’s; but she valued them greatly both for their beauty and their +associations, constantly using as many of them as she could. More than +one of her friends had repeatedly tried to persuade her that it was +not prudent to have so much plate and so many jewels in the house, for +the fact was sure to be known where it was least desirable it should: +she always said she would think about it. At times she would for a +moment contemplate sending her valuables to the bank; but her next +thought—by no means an unwise one—would always be, “Of what use will +they be at the bank? I might as well not have them at all! Better sell +them and do some good with the money!—No; I must have them about me!”</p> + +<p>There are predatory persons in every large town, who either know or +are learning to know the houses in it worth the risk of robbing. When +it falls to the lot of this or that house to be attempted, one of the +gang will make the acquaintance of some servant in it, with the object +of discovering beforehand where its treasure lies, and so reducing the +time to be spent in it, and the risk of frustration or capture. Often +they seduce one of the household to let them in, or hand out the +things they want. Any such gang, however, must soon have become +convinced that at Miss Tempest’s, corruption was impossible, and that +they could avail themselves solely of their own internal resources.</p> + +<p>It was well now for Miss Tempest that she was so faithful herself as +to encourage faithfulness in others: gladly would she have had Abdiel +sleep in her room, but she would not take the pleasure of his company +from his old master and companion in suffering. The dog therefore +slept on Clare’s bed, just as he did when the bed was as hard to +define as to lie upon, only now he had to take the part neither of +blanket nor hot bottle.</p> + +<p>One night, about half-past twelve, watchful even in slumber, he sprang +up in his lair at his master’s feet, listened a moment, gave a low +growl, again listened, and gave another growl. Clare woke, and found +his bed trembling with the tremor of his little four-footed +guardian. Telling him to keep quiet, he rose on his elbow, and in his +turn listened, but could hear nothing. He thought then he would light +his candle and go down, but concluded it wiser to descend without a +light, and listen under cloak of the darkness. If he could but save +Miss Tempest from a fright! He crept out of bed, and went first to the +window—a small one in the narrowing of the gable-wall of his attic +room: the night was warm, and, loving the night air, he had it +open. Hearkening there for a moment, he thought he heard a slight +movement below. Very softly he put out his head, and looked +down. There was no moon, but in the momentary flash of a lantern he +caught sight of a small pair of legs disappearing inside the scullery +window, which was almost under his own. Swift and noiseless he hurried +down, and reached the scullery door just in time for a little fellow +who came stealing out of it, to run against him.</p> + +<p>Now Clare had heard the housemaid read enough from the newspapers to +guess, the moment he looked from the garret window, that the legs he +saw were those of a boy sent in to open a door or window, and when the +boy, feeling his way in the dark, came against him, he gripped him by +the throat with the squeeze that used to silence Tommy. The prowler +knew the squeeze. The moment Clare relaxed it, in a piping whisper +came the words,</p> + +<p>“Clare! Clare! they said they’d kill me if I didn’t!”</p> + +<p>“Didn’t what?”</p> + +<p>“Open the door to them.”</p> + +<p>“If you utter one whimper, I’ll throttle you,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>He tightened his grasp for an instant, and Tommy, who had not +forgotten that what Clare said, he did, immediately gave in, and was +led away. Clare took him in his arms and carried him to his room, tied +him hand and foot, and left him on the floor, fast to the bedstead. +Then he crept swiftly to the servants’ room, and with some difficulty +waking them, told them what he had done, and asked them to help him.</p> + +<p>Both women of sense and courage, they undertook at once to do their +part. But when he proposed that they should open a window, as if it +were done by Tommy, and so enticing the burglars to enter, secure the +first of them, they, naturally enough, and wisely too, declined to +encounter the risk.</p> + +<p>The burglars, perplexed by the lack of any sign from Tommy yet the +utter quiet of the house, concluded probably that he had fallen +somewhere, and was lying either insensible, or unable to move and +afraid to cry out—in which case they would be at the mercy of what he +might say when he was found.</p> + +<p>Those within could hear as little noise without. They went from door +to window, wherever an attempt might be made, but all was still. Then +it occurred to Clare that he had left the scullery window +unwatched. He hastened to it—and was but just in time: two long thin +legs were sticking through, and showed by their movements that +considerable effort was being made by the body that belonged to them, +to enter after them. Legs first was the wrong way, but the youth +feared the unknown fate of Tommy, and being pig-headed, would go that +way or not at all.</p> + +<p>A boy in courage equal to Clare, but of less coolness, would at once +have made war on the intrusive legs; but Clare bethought him that, so +long as that body filled the window, no other body could pass that +way; so it would be well to keep it there, a cork to the house, making +it like the nest of a trap-door-spider. He begged the women, +therefore, who had followed him, to lay hold each of an ankle, and +stick to it like a clamp, while he ran to get some string.</p> + +<p>The women, entering heartily into the business, held on bravely. The +owner of the legs made vigorous efforts to release them, more anxious +a good deal to get out than he had been to get in, but he was not very +strong, and had no scope. His accomplices laid hold of him and pulled; +then, with good mother-wit, the women pulled away from each other, and +so made of his legs a wedge.</p> + +<p>Clare came back with a piece of clothes-line, one end of which he +slipped with a running knot round one ankle, and the other in like +fashion round the other. Then he cut the line in halves, and drawing +them over two hooks in the ceiling, some distance apart, so that the +legs continued widespread like a V upside down, hauled the feet up as +high as he could, and fastened the ends of the lines. Hold lines and +hooks, it was now impossible to draw the fellow out.</p> + +<p>Leaving the women to watch, and telling them to keep a hand on each of +the lines because the scullery was pitch-dark, he went next to his +room and looked again from the window. He feared they might be trying +to get in at some other place, for they would not readily abandon +their accomplices, and doubtless knew what a small household it was! +He would see first, therefore, what was doing outside the scullery, +and then make a round of doors and windows!</p> + +<p>Right under him when he looked out, stood a short, burly figure; +another man was taking intermittent hauls at the arms of their +leg-tied companion, regardless of his stifled cries of pain when he +did so. Clare went and fetched his water-jug, which was half full, and +leaning out once more, with the jug upright in his two hands, moved it +this way and that until he had it, as nearly as he could determine, +just over the man beneath him, and then dropped it. The jug fell +plumb, and might have killed the man but that he bent his head at the +moment, and received it between his shoulders. It knocked the breath +out of him, and he lay motionless. The other man fled. The +window-stopper, hearing the crash of the jug, wrenched and kicked and +struggled, but in vain. There he had to wait the sunrise, for not a +moment sooner would the cook open the door.</p> + +<p>When they went out at last, the stout man too was gone. He had risen +and staggered into the shrubbery, and there fallen, but had risen once +more and got away.</p> + +<p>Their captive pretended to be all but dead, thinking to move their +pity and be set free. But Clare went to the next house and got the +man-servant there to go for the police, begging him to make haste: he +knew that his tender-hearted mistress, if she came down before the +police arrived, would certainly let the fellow go, and Tommy with him; +and he was determined the law should have its way if he could compass +it. What hope was there for the wretched Tommy if he was allowed to +escape! And what right had they to let such people loose on their +neighbours! It was selfishness to indulge one’s own pity to the danger +of others! He would be his brother’s keeper by holding on to his +brother’s enemy!</p> + +<p>Going at last to his room, he found Tommy asleep. The boy was better +dressed, but no cleaner than when first he knew him. Clare proceeded +to wash and dress. Tommy woke, and lay staring, but did not utter a +sound.</p> + +<p>“Have your sleep out,” said Clare. “The police won’t be here, I +daresay, for an hour yet.”</p> + +<p>“I believe you!” returned Tommy, as impudent as ever. His +contemplation of Clare had revived his old contempt for him. “I mean +to go. I ain’t done nothing.”</p> + +<p>“Go, then,” said Clare, and took no more heed of him.</p> + +<p>“If it’s manners you want, Clare,” resumed Tommy, “<i>please</i> let me +go!”</p> + +<p>Clare turned and looked at him. The evil expression was hardened on +his countenance. He gave him no answer.</p> + +<p>“You ain’t never agoin’ to turn agin an old pal, aire you?” said +Tommy.</p> + +<p>“I ain’t a pal of yours, Tommy, or of any other thief’s!” answered +Clare.</p> + +<p>“I’ll take my oath on it to the beak!”</p> + +<p>“You’ll soon have the chance; I’ve sent for the police.” Tommy changed +his tone.</p> + +<p>“Please, Clare, let me go,” he whined.</p> + +<p>“I will not. I did what I could for you before, and I’ll do what I can +for you now. You must go with the police.”</p> + +<p>Tommy began to blubber, or pretend—Clare could not tell which.</p> + +<p>“This beastly string’s a cuttin’ into me!” he sobbed.</p> + +<p>Clare examined it, and found it easy enough.</p> + +<p>“I won’t undo one knot,” he answered, “until there’s a policeman in +the room. If you make a noise, I will stuff your mouth.”</p> + +<p>His dread was that his mistress might hear, and spoil all. “It’s her +house,” he said to himself, “but they’re my captives!”</p> + +<p>Tommy lay still, and the police came.</p> + +<p>When they untied and drew out the cork of the scullery window, Clare +thought he had seen him before, but could not remember where. One of +the policemen, however, the moment his eyes fell on his face, cried +out joyfully,</p> + +<p>“Ah, ha, my beauty! I’ve been a lookin’ for you!”</p> + +<p>“Never set eyes on ye afore,” growled the fellow.</p> + +<p>“Don’t ye say now ye ain’t a dear friend o’ mine,” insisted the +policeman, “when I carry yer pictur’ in my bosom!”</p> + +<p>He drew out a pocket-book, and from it a photograph, at which he gazed +with satisfaction, comparing it with the face before him. In another +moment Clare recognized the lad sent by Maidstone to exchange +band-boxes with him.</p> + +<p>“Her majesty the queen wants you for that robbery, you know!” said the +policeman.</p> + +<p>A boy who loved romance and generosity more than truth and +righteousness, would now have regretted the chance he had lost of +doing a fine action, and sought yet to set the rascal free. There are +men who cheat and make presents; there are men who are saints abroad +and churls at home, as Bunyan says; there are men who screw down the +wages of their clerks and leave vast sums to the poor; men who build +churches with the proceeds of drunkenness; men who promote bubble +companies and have prayers in their families morning and evening; men, +in a word, who can be very generous with what is not their own; for +nothing ill-gotten is a man’s own any more than the money in a thief’s +pocket: Clare was not of the contemptible order of the falsely +generous.</p> + +<p>Profiting, doubtless, by Maidstone’s own example, the fellow had, as +Clare now learned, run away from his master, carrying with him the +contents of the till: whether he deserved punishment more than his +master, may be left undiscussed.</p> + +<p>When first Miss Tempest’s friends heard of the attempt to break into +her house, they said—what could she expect if she took tramps into +her service! They were considerably astonished, however, when they +read in the newspaper the terms in which the magistrate had spoken of +the admirable courage and contrivance of Miss Tempest’s page, and the +resolution with which the women of her household had seconded him. If +every third house were as well defended, he said, the crime of +burglary would disappear.</p> + +<p>After the trial, Clare begged and was granted an interview with the +magistrate. He told him what he knew about Tommy, and entreated he +might be sent to some reformatory, to be kept from bad company until +he was able to distinguish between right and wrong, which he thought +he hardly could at present. The magistrate promised it should be done, +and with kind words dismissed him.</p> + +<p>Things returned to their old way at Miss Tempest’s. Her friends never +doubted she would now at last commit her plate to her banker’s strong +room, but they found themselves mistaken: she was convinced that, with +such servants and Abdiel, it was safe where it was.</p> + +<p>The leader of the gang, injured by Clare’s water-jug, was soon after +captured, and the gang was broken up.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LVII">Chapter LVII.<br><span class="smcap">Ann Shotover.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>So void of self-assertion was Clare, so prompt at the call of whoever +needed him, so quiet yet so quick, so silent in his sympathetic +ministrations, so studious and so capable, that, after two years, Miss +Tempest began to feel she ought to do what she could to “advance his +prospects,” even at the loss to herself of his services.</p> + +<p>He never came to regard Miss Tempest as he did the other women who had +saved him: he never thought of her as his fourth mother. Truly good +and kind she was, but she had a certain manner which prevented him +from feeling entirely comfortable with her. It did not escape him, +however, that Abdiel was thoroughly at his ease in her company; and he +believed therefore that the dog knew her better, or at least was more +just to her, than he.</p> + +<p>The fact was Miss Tempest kept down all her feelings, with a vague +sense that to show them would be to waste her substance: it was the +one shape that the yet lingering selfishness of a very unselfish +person took. Thus she kept him at a distance, and he stayed at a +distance, she on her part wondering that he did not open out to her +more, but neither doubting that all was right between them. Nothing, +indeed, was wrong—only they might have come a little nearer. Perhaps, +also, Miss Tempest was a little too conscious of being his patroness, +his earthly saviour.</p> + +<p>It was natural that, after the defeated robbery, Clare should become a +little known to the friends of the mistress he had so well served; +when, therefore, Miss Tempest spoke to her banker concerning the +ability of her page, mentioning that, in his spare time, he had been +reading hard, as well as attending an evening-school for mathematics, +where he gained much approbation from his master, she spoke of one +already known by him to one accustomed to regard character.</p> + +<p>The banker listened with a solemn listening from which she could not +tell what he was thinking. No one ever could tell what Mr. Shotover +was thinking: his face was not half a face; it was more a mask than a +face. High in the world’s regard, rich, and of unquestioned integrity, +he was believed to have gathered a large fortune; but he kept his +affairs to himself. That he liked his own way so much as never to +yield it, I give up to the admiration of such as himself: often +kind—when the required mode of the kindness pleased him, a constant +church-goer and giver of money, always saying less the more he made up +his mind, he had generally no trouble in getting it.</p> + +<p>Priding himself on his moral discrimination, he had, now and then, as +suited his need, taken from a lower position a young man he thought +would serve his purpose, and modelled him to it. He had had his eye on +Clare ever since reading the magistrate’s eulogy of his contrivance +and courage; but when Miss Tempest spoke, he had not made up his mind +about him, for something in the boy repelled him. He had scarcely +troubled himself to ask what it was, nor do I believe he could have +discovered, for the root of the repulsion lay in himself.</p> + +<p>Moved in part, however, by the representations of Miss Tempest, in +part also, I think, by a desire to discover that the boy was a +hypocrite, Mr. Shotover consented to give him a trial, whereupon Miss +Tempest made haste to disclose to her <i>protegé</i> the grand thing she +had done for him.</p> + +<p>She was disappointed at the coolness and lack of interest with which +Clare heard her great news. She could not but be gratified that he did +not want to leave her, but she was annoyed that he seemed unaware of +any advantage to be gained in doing so—high as the social ascent from +servitude to clerkship would by most be considered. But Clare’s +horizon was not that of the world. He had no inclination to more of +figures and less of persons. Miss Tempest, however, insisting that she +knew what was best for him, and what it was therefore his duty to do, +he listened in respectful silence to all she had to say. But what she +counted her most powerful argument—that he owed it to himself to rise +in the world—did not even touch him, did not move the slightest +response in a mind nobly devoid of ambition. Her argument was in truth +nonsense; for a man owes himself nothing, owes God everything, and +owes his neighbour whatever his own conscience goes on to require of +him for his neighbour. Feeling at the same time, however, that she had +a huge claim on his compliance with her wishes, Clare consented to +leave her kitchen for her friend’s bank, where he had of course to +take the lowest position, one counted by the rest of the clerks, +especially the one just out of it, <i>menial</i>, requiring him to be in +the bank earlier by half an hour than the others, to be the last to go +away at night, and to sleep in the house—where a not uncomfortable +room in the attic story was appointed him.</p> + +<p>Mr. Shotover himself lived above the bank—with his family, consisting +of his wife and two daughters. Mrs. Shotover suffered from a terrible +disease—that of thinking herself ill when nothing was the matter with +her except her paramount interest in herself—the source of at least +half the incurable disease among idle people. The elder daughter was a +high-spirited girl about twenty, with a frank, friendly manner, +indicating what God meant her to be, not what she was, or had yet +chosen to be. She was not really frank, and seemed far more friendly +than she was, being more selfish than she knew, and far more selfish +than she seemed: she was merry, and that goes a great way in +seeming. Her mother spent no regard upon her; her heart was too full +of herself to have in it room for a grown-up daughter as well, with +interests of her own. The younger was a child about six, of whom the +mother took not so much care by half as a tigress of her cub.</p> + +<p>One morning, a little before eight o’clock, as Clare was coming down +from his room to open the windows of the bank, he just saved himself +from tumbling over something on the attic stair, which was dark, and +at that point took rather a sharp turn. The something was a child, who +gave a low cry, and started up to run away: there was not light enough +for either to discern easily what the other was like. But Clare, to +whom childhood was the strongest attraction he yet knew, bent down his +face from where he stood on the step above her, and its moonlight glow +of love and faith shone clear in the eyes of the little girl. The +moment she saw his smile, she knew the soul that was the light of the +smile, and her doll dropped from her hands as she raised them to lay +her arms gently about his neck.</p> + +<p>“Oh!” she said, “you’re come!”</p> + +<p>He saw now, in the dusk, a pale, ordinary little face, with rather +large gray eyes, a rather characterless, tiny, up-turned nose, and a +rather pretty mouth.</p> + +<p>“Yes, little one. Were you expecting me?” he returned, with his arms +about her.</p> + +<p>“Yes,” she answered, in the tone of one stating what the other must +know.</p> + +<p>“How was it I frightened you, then?”</p> + +<p>“Only at first I thought you was an ogre! That was before I saw +you. Then I knew!”</p> + +<p>“Who told you I was coming?”</p> + +<p>“Nobody. Nobody knew you was coming but me. I’ve known it—oh, for +such a time!—ever since I was born, I think!”</p> + +<p>She turned her head a little and looked down where the doll lay a step +or two below.</p> + +<p>“You can go now, dolly,” she said. “I don’t want you any more.” Here +she paused a while, as if listening to a reply, then went on: “I am +much obliged to you, dolly; but what am I to do with you? You won’t +never speak! It has made me quite sad many a time, you know very well! +But you can’t help it! So go away, please, and be nobody, for you +never would be anybody! I did my best to get you to be somebody, but +you wouldn’t! Thank you all the same! I will take you and put you +where you can be as dull as you please, and nobody will mind.”—Here +she left Clare, went down, and lifted her plaything.—“Dolly, dolly,” +she resumed, “he’s come! I knew he would! And you don’t know it +because you’re nobody!”</p> + +<p>Without looking back, or a word of adieu to Clare, she went slowly +down the steps, one by one, with the doll in her arms, manifesting for +it neither contempt nor tenderness. Many a child would have carried +the discrowned favourite by one leg; she carried her in both hands.</p> + +<p>Clare waited a while on the narrow, closed-in, wooden stair, not a +little wondering, and full of thought. His wonder, however, had no +puzzlement in it. The child’s behaviour involved no difficulty. The +two existences came together, and each understood the other in virtue +of its essential nature. In after years Clare could put the thing into +such words; he sought none at the time. The child was lonely. She had +done her best with her doll, but it had failed her. It was not +companionable. The moment she looked in Clare’s face, she knew that he +loved her, and that she had been waiting for <i>him</i>! She was not +surprised to see him; how should it be otherwise than just so! He was +come: good bye, dolly! The child had imagination—next to conscience +the strongest ally of common sense. She knew, like St. Paul, that an +idol is nothing. As men and women grow in imagination and common +sense, more and more will sacred silly dolls be cast to the moles and +the bats. But pretty Fancy and limping Logic are powerful usurpers in +commonplace minds.</p> + +<p>Clare saw nothing more of her that day, neither tried to see her; but +he did his work in an atmosphere of roses. The work was not nearly so +interesting as house-work, but Clare was an honest gentleman, +therefore did it well: that it was not interesting was of no account; +it was his work! But to know that a child was in the house, not merely +a child for him to love, but a child that already loved him so that he +could be her servant indeed, changed the stupid bank almost into the +dome of the angels.</p> + +<p>His fellow clerks took little notice of him beyond what, in the +routine of the day, was unavoidable. He had been a page-boy: the less +they did with him the better! Were they not wronged by his +introduction into their company? The poorest creature of them believed +he would have served out the burglars better if the chance had been +his.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LVIII">Chapter LVIII.<br><span class="smcap">Child-talk.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>As Clare came down the next morning but one, there was the child again +on the dark narrow stair. She had no doll. Her hands lay folded in her +lap. She sat on the same step, the very image of child-patience. As he +approached she did not move. I believe she held solemn revel of +expectation. He laid his hand on the whitey-brown hair smoothed flat +on her head with a brush dipped in water. Not much dressing was wasted +on Ann—common little name!</p> + +<p>She rose, turned to him, and again laid her arms about his neck. No +kiss followed: she had not been taught to kiss.</p> + +<p>“Where’s dolly?” asked Clare.</p> + +<p>“Nowhere. Buried,” answered the child.</p> + +<p>“Where did you bury her? In the garden?”</p> + +<p>“No. The garden wouldn’t be nowhere!”</p> + +<p>“Where, then?”</p> + +<p>“Nowhere. I threw her out of the window.”</p> + +<p>“Into the street?”</p> + +<p>“Yes. She did fell on a horse’s back, and he jumped. I was sorry.”</p> + +<p>“It didn’t hurt him. I hope it didn’t hurt dolly!”</p> + +<p>The moment he said it, Clare’s heart reproached him: he was not +talking true! he was not talking out of his real heart to the child! +Almost with indignation she answered:—</p> + +<p>“<i>Things</i> don’t be hurt! Dolly was a thing! She’s <i>no</i> thing now!”</p> + +<p>“Why?”</p> + +<p>“Because she fell under the horse, and was seen no more.”</p> + +<p>“Is she old enough,” thought Clare, “to read the Pilgrim’s Progress?”</p> + +<p>“Will you tell me, please,” he said, “<i>when</i> a thing is only a thing?”</p> + +<p>“When it won’t mind what you do or say to it.”</p> + +<p>“And when is a thing no thing any more?”</p> + +<p>“When you never think of it again.”</p> + +<p>“Is a fly a thing?”</p> + +<p>“I <i>could</i> make a fly mind, only it would hurt it!”</p> + +<p>“Of course we wouldn’t do that!”</p> + +<p>“No; we don’t want to make a fly mind. It’s not one of our creatures.”</p> + +<p>Clare thought that was far enough in metaphysics for one morning.</p> + +<p>“I waited for you yesterday,” he said, “but you didn’t come!”</p> + +<p>“Dolly didn’t like to be buried. I mean, I didn’t like burying +dolly. I cried and wouldn’t come.”</p> + +<p>“Then why did you bury dolly?”</p> + +<p>“She <i>had</i> to be buried. I told you she couldn’t <i>be</i> anybody! So I +<i>made</i> her be buried.”</p> + +<p>“I see! I quite understand.—But what have you to amuse yourself with +now?”</p> + +<p>“I don’t want to be mused now. You’s come! I’m growed up!”</p> + +<p>“Yes, of course!” answered Clare; but he was puzzled what to say next.</p> + +<p>What could he do for her? Glad would he have been to take her down to +the sea, or to the docks, or into the country somewhere, till +dinner-time, and then after dinner take her out again! But there was +his work—ugly, stupid work that had to be done, as dolly <i>had</i> to be +buried! Alas for the child who has discarded her toys, and is suddenly +growed up! What is she to do with herself? Clare’s coming had caused +the loss of Ann’s former interests: he felt bound to make up to her +for that loss. But how? It was a serious question, and not being his +own master, he could not in a moment answer it.</p> + +<p>“I wish I could stay with you all day!” he said. “But your papa wants +me in the bank. I must go.”</p> + +<p>Clare had not had a good sight of the child, and was at a loss to +think what must be her age. Her language, both in form and utterance, +was partly precise and <i>grown-up</i>, and partly childish; but her wisdom +was child-like—and that is the opposite both of precise and +childish. It was the wisdom that comes of unity between thought and +action.</p> + +<p>“Is there anything I can do for you before I go?—for I must go,” said +Clare.</p> + +<p>“Who says <i>must</i> to you? Nurse says <i>must</i> to me.”</p> + +<p>“Your papa says <i>must</i> to me.”</p> + +<p>“If you didn’t say <i>yes</i> when papa said <i>must</i>, what would come next?”</p> + +<p>“He would say, ‘Go out of my house, and never come in again.’”</p> + +<p>“And would you do it?”</p> + +<p>“I must: the house is his, not mine.”</p> + +<p>“If I didn’t say <i>yes</i> when papa said <i>must</i>, what would happen?”</p> + +<p>“He would try to make you say it.”</p> + +<p>“And if I wouldn’t, would he say, ‘Go out of my house and never come +in again’?”</p> + +<p>“No; you are his little girl!”</p> + +<p>“Then I think he shouldn’t say it to you.—What is your name?”</p> + +<p>“Clare.”</p> + +<p>“Then, Clare, if my papa sends you out of his house, I will go with +you.—You wouldn’t turn me out, would you, when I was a <i>little</i> +naughty?”</p> + +<p>“No; neither would your papa.”</p> + +<p>“If he turned you out, it would be all the same. Where you go, I will +go. I must, you know! Would you mind if he said, ‘Go away’?”</p> + +<p>“I should be very sorry to leave you.”</p> + +<p>“Yes, but that’s not going to be! Why do you stay with papa? Were you +in the house always—ever so long before I saw you?”</p> + +<p>“No; a very little while only.”</p> + +<p>“Did you come in from the street?”</p> + +<p>“Yes; I came in from the street. Your papa pays me to work for him.”</p> + +<p>“And if you wouldn’t?”</p> + +<p>“Then I should have no money, and nothing to eat, and nowhere to sleep +at night.”</p> + +<p>“Would that make you uncomfable?”</p> + +<p>“It would make me die.”</p> + +<p>“Have you a papa?”</p> + +<p>“Yes, but he’s far away.”</p> + +<p>“You could go to him, couldn’t you?”</p> + +<p>“One day I shall.”</p> + +<p>“Why don’t you go now, and take me?”</p> + +<p>“Because he died.”</p> + +<p>“What’s <i>died</i>?”</p> + +<p>“Went away out of sight, where we can’t go to look for him till we go +out of sight too.”</p> + +<p>“When will that be?”</p> + +<p>“I don’t know.”</p> + +<p>“Does anybody know?”</p> + +<p>“Nobody.”</p> + +<p>“Then perhaps you will never go?”</p> + +<p>“We must go; it’s only that nobody knows when.”</p> + +<p>“I think the when that nobody knows, mayn’t never come.—Is that why +you have to work?”</p> + +<p>“Everybody has to work one way or another.”</p> + +<p>“I haven’t to work!”</p> + +<p>“If you don’t work when you’re old enough, you’ll be miserable.”</p> + +<p>“<i>You’re</i> not old enough.”</p> + +<p>“Oh, yes, indeed I am! I’ve been working a long time now.”</p> + +<p>“Where? Not for papa?”</p> + +<p>“No; not for papa.”</p> + +<p>“Why not? Why didn’t you come sooner? Why didn’t you come <i>much</i> +sooner—<i>ever</i> so much sooner? Why did you make me wait for you all +the time?”</p> + +<p>“Nobody ever told me you were waiting.”</p> + +<p>“Nobody ever told me you were coming, but I knew.”</p> + +<p>“You had to wait for me, and you knew. I had to wait for you, and I +didn’t know! When we have time, I will tell you all about myself, and +how I’ve been waiting too.”</p> + +<p>“Waiting for me?”</p> + +<p>“No.”</p> + +<p>“Who for?”</p> + +<p>“For my father and mother—and somebody else, I think.”</p> + +<p>“That’s me.”</p> + +<p>“No; I’m waiting yet. I didn’t know I was coming to you till I came, +and there you were!”</p> + +<p>The child was silent for a moment. Then she said thoughtfully,</p> + +<p>“You will tell me <i>all</i> about yourself! That <i>will</i> be nice!—Can you +tell stories?” she added. “—Of course you can! You can do +<i>every</i>thing!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, no, I can’t!”</p> + +<p>“Can’t you?”</p> + +<p>“No; I can do <i>some</i> things—not many. I can love you, little +one!—Now I must go, or I shall be late, and nobody ever ought to be +late.”</p> + +<p>“Go then. I will go to my nursery and wait again.”</p> + +<p>She went down the stair without once looking behind her. Clare +followed. On the next floor she went one way to her nursery, and he +another to the back-stairs.</p> + +<p>One of the causes and signs of Clare’s manliness was, that he never +aimed at being a man. Many men continue childish because they are +always trying to act like men, instead of simply trying to do +right. Such never develop true manliness; Clare’s manhood stole upon +him unawares. That which at once made him a man and kept him a child, +was, that he had no regard for anything but what was real, that is, +true.</p> + +<p>All the day the thought kept coming, what could he do for the little +girl? Perhaps what stirred his feeling for her most, was a suspicion +that she was neglected. But the careless treatment of a nurse was +better for her than would have been the capricious blandishments and +neglects of a mother like Mrs. Shotover. Clare, however, knew nothing +yet about Ann’s mother. He knew only, by the solemnly still ways of +the child, that she must be much left to her own resources, and was +wonderfully developed in consequence—whether healthily or not, he +could not yet tell. The practical question was—how to contrive to be +her occasional companion; how to offer to serve her.</p> + +<p>After much thinking, he concluded that he must wait: opportunity might +suggest mode; and he would rather find than make opportunity!</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LIX">Chapter LIX.<br><span class="smcap">Lovers’ Walks.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>He had not long to wait. That very afternoon, going a message for the +head-clerk, he met Ann walking with a young lady—who must be Miss +Shotover. Neither sister seemed happy with the other. Ann was very +white, and so tired that she could but drag her little feet after +her. Miss Shotover, flushed with exertion, and annoyed with her part +of nursemaid, held her tight and hauled her along by the hand. She +looked good-natured, but not one of the ministering sort. Every now +and then she would give the little arm a pull, and say, though not +<i>very</i> crossly, “Do come along!” The child did not cry, but it was +plain she suffered. It was plain also she was doing her best to get +home, and avoid rousing her sister’s tug.</p> + +<p>Keen-sighted, Clare had recognized Ann at some distance, and as he +approached had a better opportunity than on the dark stair of seeing +what his little friend was like. He saw that her eyes were unusually +clear, and, paces away, could distinguish the blue veins on her +forehead: she looked even more delicate than he had thought her. The +lines of her mouth were straightened out with the painful effort she +had to make to keep up with her sister. Her nose continued +insignificant, waiting to learn what was expected of it.</p> + +<p>For Miss Shotover, there was not a good feature in her face, and even +to a casual glance it might have suggested a measure of meanness. But +a bright complexion, and the youthful charm which vanishes with youth, +are pleasant in their season. Her figure was lithe, and in general she +had a look of fun; but at the moment heat and impatience clouded her +countenance.</p> + +<p>Clare stopped and lifted his hat. Then first the dazed child saw him, +for she was short-sighted, and her observation was dulled by +weariness. She said not a word, uttered no sound, only drew her hand +from her sister’s, and held up her arms to her friend—in dumb prayer +to be lifted above the thorns of life, and borne along without pain. +He caught her up.</p> + +<p>“I beg your pardon, ma’am,” he said, “but the little one and I have +met before:—I live in the house, having the honour to be the youngest +of your father’s clerks. If you will allow me, I will carry the +child. She looks tired!”</p> + +<p><figure class="figcenter illowp47" id="008a" style="max-width: 39.25em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/008a.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">Clare asks Miss Shotover to let him carry Ann home.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>Miss Shotover was glad enough to be relieved of her clog, and gave +smiling consent.</p> + +<p>“If you would be so kind as to carry her home,” she said, “I should be +able to do a little shopping!”</p> + +<p>“You will not mind my taking her a little farther first, ma’am? I am +on a message for Mr. Woolrige. I will carry her all the way, and be +very careful of her.”</p> + +<p>Miss Shotover was not one to cherish anxiety. She already knew Clare +both by report and by sight, and willingly yielded. Saying, with one +of her pleasant smiles, that she would hold him accountable for her, +she sailed away, like a sloop that had been dragging her anchor, but +had now cut her cable. Clare thought what a sweet-looking girl she +was—and in truth she was sweet-<i>looking</i>. Then, all his heart turned +to the little one in his arms.</p> + +<p>What a walk was that for both of them! Little Ann seemed never to have +lived before: she was actually happy! She had been long waiting for +Clare, and he was come—and such as she had expected him! It was bliss +to glide thus along the busy street without the least exertion, +looking down on the heads of the people, safe above danger and fear +amid swift-moving things and the crowding confusions of life! To be in +Clare’s arms was better than being in the little house on the +elephant’s back in her best picture-book! True, little one! To be in +the arms of love, be they ever so weak, is better than to ride the +grandest horse in all the stables of God—and God would have you know +it! Never mind your pale little face and your puny nose! While your +heart is ready to die for love-sake, you are blessed among women! +Only remember that to die of disappointment is not to die either of or +for love!</p> + +<p>And to Clare, after all those days upon days during which only a dog +would come to his arms, what a glory of life it was to have a human +child in them, the little heart of the pale face beating against his +side! He was not going to forget Abdiel. Abdiel was not a fact to be +forgotten. Abdiel was not a doll, Abdiel was not a thing that would +not come alive. Abdiel was a true heart, a live soul, and Clare would +love him for ever!—not an atom the less that now he had one out upon +whom a larger love was able to flow! All true love makes abler to +love. It is only false love, the love of those who take their own +meanest selfishness, their own pleasure in being loved, for love, that +shrinks and narrows the soul.</p> + +<p>To the pale-faced, listening child, Clare talked much about the +wonderful Abdiel, and about the kind good Miss Tempest who was keeping +him to live again at length with his old master; and Ann loved the dog +she had never seen, because the dog loved the Clare who was come at +last.</p> + +<p>When they returned, Clare rang the house-bell, and gave up his charge +to the man who opened the door. Without word or tone, gesture or look +of objection, or even of disinclination, the child submitted to be +taken from Clare’s loving embrace, and carried to a nurse who was +neither glad nor sorry to see her.</p> + +<p>He had been so long gone that Mr. Woolrige found fault with him for +it. Clare told him he had met Miss Shotover with her sister, and the +child seemed so tired he had asked leave to carry her with him, +Mr. Woolrige was not pleased, but he said nothing; on the spot the +clerks nicknamed him <i>Nursie</i>; and Clare did his best to justify the +appellation—he never lost a chance of acting up to it, and always +answered when they summoned him by it.</p> + +<p>Before the week was ended, he sought an interview with Miss Shotover, +and asked her whether he might not take little Ann out for a walk +whenever the evening was fine. For at five o’clock the doors of the +bank were shut, and in half an hour after he was free. Miss Shotover +said she saw no objection, and would tell the nurse to have her ready +as often as the weather was fit; whereupon Clare left her with a +gratitude far beyond any degree of that emotion by her conceivable. +The nurse, on her part, was willing to gratify Clare, and not sorry to +be rid of the child, who was not one, indeed, to interest any ordinary +woman.</p> + +<p>The summer came and was peculiarly fine, and almost every evening +Clare might be seen taking his pleasure—neither like bank-clerk nor +like nurse-maid, for always he had little Ann in his arms, or was +leading her along with care and entire attention: he never let her +walk except on entreaty, and not always then. To his fellow clerks +this proof of an utter lack of dignity seemed consistent with his +origin—of which they knew nothing; they knew only his late +position. To themselves they were fine gentlemen with cigars in their +mouths, and he was a lackey to the bone! To himself Clare was the +lover of a child; and about them he did not think. Theirs was the life +of a town; Clare’s was a life of the universe.</p> + +<p>The pair came speedily to understand and communicate like twin brother +and sister. Clare, as he carried her, always knew when Ann wanted a +change of position; Ann always knew when Clare began to grow +weary—knew before Clare himself—and would insist on walking. +Neither could remember how it came, but it grew a custom that, when +they walked hand in hand, Clare told her stories of his life and +adventures; when he carried her, he told her fairy-tales, which he +could spin like a spider: she preferred the former.</p> + +<p>So neither bank nor nursery was any longer dreary.</p> + +<p>At length came the gray, brooding winter, causing red fingers and +aches and chilblains. But it was not unfriendly to little Ann. True, +she was not permitted to go out in the evening any more, but Clare, +with the help of the cook, devoted to her his dinner-hour instead. It +was no hardship to eat from a basket in place of a table, to one who +never troubled himself as to the kind, quality, or quantity of his +food itself. He had learned, like a good soldier, to endure +hardness. I have heard him say that never did he enjoy a dinner more +than when, in those homeless days of his boyhood, he tore the flakes +off a loaf fresh from the baker’s oven, and ate them as he walked +along the street. The old highlanders of Scotland were trained to +think it the part of a gentleman not to mind what he ate—sign of +scant civilization, no doubt, in the eyes of some who now occupy but +do not fill their place—as time will show, when the call is for men +to fight, not to eat.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LX">Chapter LX.<br><span class="smcap">The Shoe-black.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>The head-clerk, while he had not a word against him, as he confessed +to Mr. Shotover, yet thought Clare would never make a man of +business. When pressed to say on what he grounded the opinion, he +could only answer that the lad did not seem to have his heart in it. +But if, to be a man of business, it is not enough to do one’s duty +scrupulously, but the very heart must be in it, then is there +something wrong with business. The heart fares as its treasure: who +would be content his heart should fare as not a few sorts of treasure +must? Mr. Woolrige passed no such judgment, however, upon certain +older young men in the bank, whose hearts certainly were not in the +business, but even worse posited.</p> + +<p>One cold, miserable day, at once damp and frosty, on which it was +quite unfit to take Ann out, Clare, having eaten a hasty dinner, and +followed it with a walk, was returning through the town in good time +for the recommencement of business, when he came upon a little boy, at +the corner of a street, blowing his fingers, and stumping up and down +the pavement to keep his blood moving while he waited for a job: his +brushes lay on the top of his blacking-box on the curbstone. Clare saw +that he was both hungry and cold—states of sensation with which he +was far too familiar to look on the signs of them with indifference. +To give him something to do, and so something to eat, he went to his +block and put his foot on it. The boy bustled up, snatched at his +brushes, and began operations. But, whether from the coldness or +incapacity of his hands, Clare soon saw that his boots would not be +polished that afternoon.</p> + +<p>“You don’t seem quite up to your business, my boy!” he said. “What’s +the matter?”</p> + +<p>The boy made no answer, but went on with his vain attempt. A moment +more, and Clare saw a tear fall on the boot he was at work upon.</p> + +<p>“This won’t do!” said Clare. “Let me look at <i>your</i> boots.”</p> + +<p>The boy stood up, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.</p> + +<p>“Ah!” said Clare, “I don’t wonder you can’t polish my boots, when you +don’t care to polish your own!”</p> + +<p>“Please, sir,” answered the boy, “it’s Jim as does it! He’s down wi’ +the measles, an’ I ain’t up to it.”</p> + +<p>“Look here, then! I’ll give you a lesson,” said Clare. “Many’s the +boot I’ve blacked. Up with your foot! I’ll soon show you how the +thing’s done!”</p> + +<p>“Please, sir,” objected the boy, “there ain’t enough boot left to take +a polish!”</p> + +<p>“We’ll see about that!” returned Clare. “Put it up. I’ve worn worse in +my time.”</p> + +<p>The boy obeyed. The boot was very bad, but there was enough leather to +carry some blacking, and the skin took the rest.</p> + +<p><figure class="figcenter illowp47" id="008b" style="max-width: 39.8125em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/008b.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">Clare is found giving the shoe-black a lesson.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + +<p>Clare was working away, growing pleasantly hot with the quick, sharp +motion, while two of his fellow clerks were strolling up on the other +side of the corner, who had been having more with their lunch than was +good for them. Swinging round, they came upon a well dressed youth +brushing a ragged boy’s boots. It was an odd sight, and one of them, +whose name was Marway, thought to get some fun out of the phenomenon.</p> + +<p>“Here!” he cried, “I want my boots brushed.”</p> + +<p>Clare rose to his feet, saying,</p> + +<p>“Brush the gentleman’s boots. I will finish yours after, and then you +shall finish mine.”</p> + +<p>“Hullo, Nursie! it’s you turned boot-black, is it?—Nice thing for the +office, Jack!” remarked Marway, who was the finest gentleman, and the +lowest blackguard among the clerks.</p> + +<p>He put his foot on the block. The boy began his task, but did no +better with his boots than he had done with Clare’s.</p> + +<p>“Soul of an ass!” cried Marway, “are you going to keep my foot there +till it freezes to the block? Why don’t you do as Nursie tells you? +<i>He</i> knows how to brush a boot! <i>You</i> ain’t worth your salt! You ain’t +fit to black a donkey’s hoofs!”</p> + +<p>“Give me the brushes, my boy,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>The boy rose abashed, and obeyed. After a few of Clare’s light rapid +strokes, the boots looked very different.</p> + +<p>“Bravo, Nursie!” cried Marway. “There ain’t a flunkey of you all could +do it better!”</p> + +<p>Clare said nothing, finished the job, and stood up. Marway, turning on +the other heel as he set his foot down, said, “Thank you, Nursie!” +and was walking off.</p> + +<p>“Please, Mr. Marway, give the boy his penny,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>But Marway wanted to <i>take a rise out of</i> Clare.</p> + +<p>“The fool did nothing for me!” he answered. “He made my boot worse +than it was.”</p> + +<p>“It was I did nothing for you, Mr. Marway,” rejoined Clare. “What I +did, I did for the boy.”</p> + +<p>“Then let the boy pay you!” said Marway.</p> + +<p>The shoe-black went into a sudden rage, caught up one of his brushes, +and flung it at Marway as he turned. It struck him on the side of the +head. Marway swore, stalked up to Clare and knocked him down, then +strode away with a grin.</p> + +<p>The shoe-black sent his second brush whizzing past his ear, but he +took no notice. Clare got up, little the worse, only bruised.</p> + +<p>“See what comes of doing things in a passion!” he said, as the boy +came back with the brushes he had hastened to secure. “Here’s your +penny! Put up your foot.”</p> + +<p>The boy did as he was told, but kept foaming out rage at the bloke +that had refused him his penny, and knocked down his friend. It did +not occur to him that he was himself the cause of the outrage, and +that his friend had suffered for him. Clare’s head ached a good deal, +but he polished the boy’s boots. Then he made him try again on his +boots, when, warmed by his rage, he did a little better. Clare gave +him another penny, and went to the bank.</p> + +<p>Marway was not there, nor did he show himself for a day or two. Clare +said nothing about what had taken place, neither did the others.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LXI">Chapter LXI.<br><span class="smcap">A Walk with Consequences.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Clare had been in the bank more than a year, and not yet had +Mr. Shotover discovered why he did not quite trust him. Had Clare +known he did not, he would have wondered that he trusted him with such +a precious thing as his little Ann. But was his child very precious to +Mr. Shotover? When a man’s heart is in his business, that is, when he +is set on making money, some precious things are not so precious to +him as they might be—among the rest, the living God and the man’s own +life. He would pass Clare and the child without even a nod to indicate +approval, or a smile for the small woman. He had, I presume, +sufficient regard for the inoffensive little thing to be content she +should be happy, therefore did not interfere with what his clerks +counted so little to the honour of the bank. But although, as I have +said, he still doubted Clare, true eyes in whatever head must have +perceived that the child was in charge of an angel. The countenance of +Clare with Ann in his arms, was so peaceful, so radiant of simple +satisfaction, that surely there were some in that large town who, +seeing them, thought of the angels that do alway behold the face of +the Father in heaven.</p> + +<p>One evening in the early summer, when they had resumed their walks +after five o’clock, they saw, in a waste place, where houses had been +going to be built for the last two years, a number of caravans drawn +up in order.</p> + +<p>A rush of hope filled the heart of Clare: what if it should be the +menagerie he knew so well! And, sure enough, there was Mr. Halliwell +superintending operations! But if Glum Gunn were about, he might find +it awkward with the child in his arms! Gunn might not respect even +her! Besides he ought to ask leave to take her! He would carry her +home first, and come again to see his third mother and all his old +friends, with Pummy and the lion and the rest of the creatures.</p> + +<p>Little Ann was eager to know what those curious houses on wheels +were. Clare told her they were like her Noah’s ark, full of beasts, +only real, live beasts, not beasts made of bits of stick. She became +at once eager to see them—the more eager that her contempt of things +like life that wouldn’t come alive had been growing stronger ever +since she threw her doll out of the window. Clare told her he could +not take her without first asking leave. This puzzled her: Clare was +her highest authority.</p> + +<p>“But if <i>you</i> take me?” she said.</p> + +<p>“Your papa and mamma might not like me to take you.”</p> + +<p>“But I’m yours!”</p> + +<p>“Yes, you’re mine—but not so much,” he added with a sigh, “as +theirs!”</p> + +<p>“Ain’t I?” she rejoined, in a tone of protesting astonishment mingled +with grief, and began to wriggle, wanting to get down.</p> + +<p>Clare set her down, and would have held her, as usual, by the hand, +but she would not let him. She stood with her eyes on the ground, and +her little gray face looking like stone. It frightened Clare, and he +remained a moment silent, reviewing the situation.</p> + +<p>“You see, little one,” he said at length, “you were theirs before I +came! You were sent to them. You are their own little girl, and we +must mind what they would like!”</p> + +<p>“It was only till you came!” she argued. “They don’t care <i>very</i> much +for me. Ask them, please, to sell me to you. I don’t think they would +want much money for me! How many shillings do you think I am worth, +Clare? Not many, I hope!—Six?”</p> + +<p>“You are worth more than all the money in your papa’s bank,” answered +Clare, looking down at her lovingly.</p> + +<p>The child’s face fell.</p> + +<p>“Am I?” she said. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t know I was worth so +much!—and not yours!” she added, with a sigh that seemed to come from +the very heart of her being. “Then you’re not able to buy me?”</p> + +<p>“No, indeed, little one!” answered Clare. “Besides, papas don’t sell +their little girls!”</p> + +<p>“Oh, yes, they do! Gus said so to Trudie!” Clare knew that <i>Trudie</i> +meant her sister Gertrude.</p> + +<p>“Who is Gus?” he asked.</p> + +<p>“Trudie calls him Gus. I don’t know more name to him. Perhaps they +call him something else in the bank.”</p> + +<p>“Oh! he’s in the bank, is he?” returned Clare. “Then I think I know +him.”</p> + +<p>“He said it to her one night in my nursery. Jane went down; I was in +my crib. They talked such a long time! I tried to go to sleep, but I +couldn’t. I heard all what he said to her. It wasn’t half so nice as +what you talk to me!”</p> + +<p>This was not pleasant news to Clare. Augustus Marway was, if half the +tales of him were true, no fit person for his master’s daughter to be +intimate with! He had once heard Mr. Shotover speak about gambling in +such terms of disapprobation as he had never heard him use about +anything else; and it was well known in the bank that Marway was in +the company of gamblers almost every night. He was so troubled, that +at first he wished the child had not told him. For what was he to do? +Could it be right to let the thing go on? Clare felt sure Mr. Shotover +either did not know that Marway gambled, or did not know that he +talked in the nursery with his daughter. But, alas, he could do +nothing without telling, and they all said none but the lowest of cads +would carry tales! For the young men thought it the part of gentlemen +<i>to stick by each other</i>, and hide from Mr. Shotover some things he +had a right to know. But Clare saw that, whatever they might think, he +must act in the matter. Little Ann wondered that he scarcely spoke to +her all the way home. But she did not say anything, for she too was +troubled: she did not belong to Clare so much as she had thought she +did!</p> + +<p>Clare reflected also as he went, how much he owed Ann’s sister for +letting him have the little one. She had always spoken to him kindly +too, and never seemed, like the clerks, to look down upon him because +he had been a page-boy—though, he thought, if they were to be as +often hungry as he had been, they would be glad to be page-boys +themselves! For himself, he liked to be a page-boy! He would do +anything for Miss Tempest! And he must do what he could for Miss +Shotover! It would be wicked to let her marry a man that was wicked! +He had himself seen him drunk! Would it be fair, knowing she did not +know, not to tell? Would it not be helping to hurt her? Was he to be a +coward and fear being called bad names? Was he, for the sake of the +good opinion of rascals, to take care of the rascal, and let the lady +take care of herself? There was this difficulty, however, that he +could assert nothing beyond having seen him drunk!</p> + +<p>He carried Ann to the nursery, and set out for the menagerie. When he +knocked at the door of the house-caravan, Mrs. Halliwell opened it, +stared hardly an instant, threw her arms round his neck, and kissed +him.</p> + +<p>“Come in, come in, my boy!” she said. “It makes me a happy woman to +see you again. I’ve been just miserable over what might have befallen +you, and me with all that money of yours! I’ve got it by me safe, +ready for you! I lie awake nights and fancy Gunn has got hold of you, +and made away with you; then fall asleep and am sure of it. He’s been +gone several times, a looking for you, I know! I think he’s afraid of +you; I know he hates you. Mind you keep out of his sight; he’ll do you +a mischief if he has the chance. He’s the same as ever, a man to make +life miserable.”</p> + +<p>“I’ve never done him wrong,” said Clare, “and I’m not going to keep +out of his way as if I were afraid of him! I mean to come and see the +animals to-morrow.”</p> + +<p>A great deal more passed between them. They had their tea +together. Mr. Halliwell, who did not care for tea, came and went +several times, and now the night was dark. Then they spoke again of +Gunn.</p> + +<p>“Well, I don’t think he’ll venture to interfere with you,” said +Mrs. Halliwell, “except he happens to be drunk.—But what’s that +talking? <i>We</i>’re all quiet for the night. Listen.”</p> + +<p>For some time Clare had been conscious of the whispered sounds of a +dialogue somewhere near, but had paid no attention. The voices were +now plainer than at first. When his mother told him to listen, he did, +and thought he had heard one of them before. It was peculiar—that of +an old Jew whom he had seen several times at the bank. As the talking +went on, he began to think he knew the other voice also. It was that +of Augustus Marway. The two fancied themselves against a caravan full +of wild beasts.</p> + +<p>Marway was the son of the port-admiral, who, late in life, married a +silly woman. She died young, but not before she had ruined her son, +whose choice company was the least respectable of the officers who +came ashore from the king’s ships.</p> + +<p>He had of late been playing deeper and having worse luck; and had +borrowed until no one would lend him a single sovereign more. His +father knew, in a vague way, how he was going on, and had nearly lost +hope of his reformation. Having yet large remains of a fine physical +constitution, he seldom failed to appear at the bank in the +morning—if not quite in time, yet within the margin of lateness that +escaped rebuke. Mr. Shotover was a connection by marriage, which gave +Marway the privilege of being regarded by Miss Shotover as a cousin—a +privilege with desirable possibilities contingent, making him anxious +to retain the good opinion of his employer.</p> + +<p>Clare heard but a portion here and there of the conversation going on +outside the wooden wall; but it was plain nevertheless that Marway was +pressing a creditor to leave him alone until he was married, when he +would pay every shilling he owed him.</p> + +<p>The young fellow had a persuasive tongue, and boasted he could get the +better of even a Jew. Clare heard the money-lender grant him a renewal +for three months, when, if Marway did not pay, or were not the +accepted suitor of the lady whose fortune was to redeem him, his +creditor would take his course.</p> + +<p>The moment he perceived they were about to part, Clare hastened from +the caravan, and went along the edge of the waste ground, so as to +meet Marway on his road back to the town: at the corner of it they +came jump together. Marway started when Clare addressed him. Seeing, +then, who claimed his attention, he drew himself up.</p> + +<p>“Well?” he said.</p> + +<p>“Mr. Marway,” began Clare, “I heard a great deal of what passed +between you and old Lewin.”</p> + +<p>Marway used worse than vulgar language at times, and he did so now, +ending with the words,</p> + +<p>“A spy! a sneaking spy! Would you like to lick my boot? By Jove, you +shall know the taste of it!”</p> + +<p>“Nobody minds being overheard who hasn’t something to conceal! If I +had low secrets I would not stand up against the side of a caravan +when I wanted to talk about them. I was inside. Not to hear you I +should have had to stop my ears.”</p> + +<p>“Why didn’t you, then, you low-bred flunkey?”</p> + +<p>“Because I had heard of you what made it my duty to listen.”</p> + +<p>Marway cursed his insolence, and asked what he was doing in such a +place. He would report him, he said.</p> + +<p>“What I was doing is my business,” answered Clare. “Had I known you +for an honest man I would not have listened to yours. I should have +had no right.”</p> + +<p>“You tell me to my face I’m a swindler!” said Marway between his +teeth, letting out a blow at Clare, which he cleverly dodged.</p> + +<p>“I do!”</p> + +<p>“I don’t know what you mean, but bitterly shall you repent your +insolence, you prying rascal! This is your sweet revenge for a blow +you had not the courage to return!—to dog me and get hold of my +affairs! You cur! You’re going to turn informer next, of course, and +bear false witness against your neighbour! You shall repent it, I +swear!”</p> + +<p>“Will it be bearing false witness to say that Miss Shotover does not +know the sort of man who wants to marry her? Does she know why he +wants to marry her? Does her father know that you are in the clutches +of a money-lender?”</p> + +<p>Marway caught hold of Clare and threatened to kill him. Clare did not +flinch, and he calmed down a little.</p> + +<p>“What do you want to square it?” he growled.</p> + +<p>“I don’t understand you,” returned Clare.</p> + +<p>“What’s the size of your tongue-plaster?”</p> + +<p>“I don’t know much slang.”</p> + +<p>“What bribe will silence you then? I hope that is plain enough—even +for <i>your</i> comprehension!”</p> + +<p>“If I had meant to hold my tongue, I should have held it.”</p> + +<p>“What do you want, then?”</p> + +<p>“To keep you from marrying Miss Shotover.”</p> + +<p>“By Jove! And suppose I kick you into the gutter, and tell you to mind +your own business—what then?”</p> + +<p>“I will tell either your father or Mr. Shotover all about it.”</p> + +<p>“Even you can’t be such a fool! What good would it do you? You’re not +after her yourself, are you?—Ha! ha!—that’s it! I didn’t nose +that!—But come, hang it! where’s the <i>use</i>?—I’ll give you four +flimsies—there! Twenty pounds, you idiot! There!”</p> + +<p>“Mr. Marway, nothing will make me hold my tongue—not even your +promise to drop the thing.”</p> + +<p>“Then what made you come and cheek me? Impudence?”</p> + +<p>“Not at all! I should have been glad enough not to have to do it! I +came to you for my own sake.”</p> + +<p>“That of course!”</p> + +<p>“I came because I would do nothing underhand!”</p> + +<p>“What are you going to do next, then?”</p> + +<p>“I am going to tell Mr. Shotover, or Admiral Marway—I haven’t yet +made up my mind which.”</p> + +<p>“What are you going to tell them?”</p> + +<p>“That old Lewin has given you three months to get engaged to Miss +Shotover, or take the consequences of not being able to pay what you +owe him.”</p> + +<p>“And you don’t count it underhand to carry such a tale?”</p> + +<p>“I do not. It would have been if I hadn’t told you first. I would tell +Miss Shotover, only, if she be anything of a girl, she wouldn’t +believe me.”</p> + +<p>“I should think not! Come, come, be reasonable! I always thought you a +good sort of fellow, though I <i>was</i> rough on you, I confess. There! +take the money, and leave me my chance.”</p> + +<p>“No. I will save the lady if I can. She shall at least know the sort +of man you are.”</p> + +<p>“Then it’s war to the knife, is it?”</p> + +<p>“I mean to tell the truth about you.”</p> + +<p>“Then do your worst. You shall black my boots again.”</p> + +<p>“If I do, I shall have the penny first.”</p> + +<p>“You cringing flunkey!”</p> + +<p>“I haven’t cringed to you, Mr. Marway!”</p> + +<p>Marway tried to kick him, failed, and strode into the dark between him +and the lamps of the town.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LXII">Chapter LXII.<br><span class="smcap">The Cage of the Puma.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Marway was a fine, handsome fellow, whose manners, where he saw +reason, soon won him favour, and two of the young men in the office +were his ready slaves. Every moment of the next day Clare was +watched. Marway had laid his plans, and would forestall +frustration. Clare could hardly do anything before the dinner-hour, +but Marway would make assurance double sure.</p> + +<p>At anchor in the roads lay a certain frigate, whose duty it was to +sail round the islands, like a duck about her floating brood. Among +the young officers on board were two with whom Marway was intimate. He +had met them the night before, and they had together laid a plot for +nullifying Clare’s interference with Marway’s scheme—which his +friends also had reason to wish successful, for Marway owed them both +money. Clare had come in the way of all three.</p> + +<p>Now little Ann was a guardian cherub to the object of their enmity, +and he and she must first of all be separated. Clare had asked leave +of Miss Shotover to take the child to Noah’s ark, as she called it, +that evening, and Marway had learned it from her: Clare’s going would +favour their plan, but the child’s presence would render it +impracticable.</p> + +<p>One thing in their favour was, that Mr. Shotover was from home. If +Clare had resolved on telling him rather than the admiral, he could +not until the next evening, and that would give them abundant time. On +the other hand, having him watched, they could easily prevent him from +finding the admiral. But Clare had indeed come to the just conclusion +that his master had the first right to know what he had to tell. His +object was not the exposure of Marway, but the protection of his +master’s daughter: he would, therefore, wait Mr. Shotover’s return. +He said to himself also, that Marway would thereby have a chance to +bethink himself, and, like Hamlet’s uncle, “try what repentance can.”</p> + +<p>As soon as he had put the bank in order for the night, he went to find +his little companion, and take her to Noah’s ark. The child had been +sitting all the morning and afternoon in a profound stillness of +expectation; but the hour came and passed, and Clare did not appear.</p> + +<p>“You never, never, never came,” she said to him afterward. “I had to +go to bed, and the beasts went away.”</p> + +<p>It was many long weeks before she told him this, or her solemn little +visage smiled again.</p> + +<p>He went to the little room off the hall, where he almost always found +her waiting for him, dressed to go. She was not there. Nobody came. He +grew impatient, and ran in his eagerness up the front stair. At the +top he met the butler coming from the drawing-room—a respectable old +man, who had been in the family as long as his master.</p> + +<p>“Pardon me, Mr. Porson,” said the butler, who was especially polite to +Clare, recognizing in him the ennoblement of his own order, “but it is +against the rules for any of the gentlemen below to come up this +staircase.”</p> + +<p>“I know I’m in the wrong,” answered Clare; “but I was in such a hurry +I ventured this once. I’ve been waiting for Miss Ann twenty minutes.”</p> + +<p>“If you will go down, I will make inquiry, and let you know directly,” +replied the butler.</p> + +<p>Clare went down, and had not waited more than another minute when the +butler brought the message that the child was not to go out. In vain +Clare sought an explanation; the old man knew nothing of the matter, +but confessed that Miss Shotover seemed a little put out.</p> + +<p>Then Clare saw that his desire to do justice had thwarted his +endeavour: Marway had seen Miss Shotover, he concluded, and had so +thoroughly prejudiced her against anything he might say, that she had +already taken the child from him! He repented that he had told him his +purpose before he was ready to follow it up with immediate +action. Distressed at the thought of little Ann’s disappointment, he +set out for the show, glad in the midst of his grief, that he was +going to see Pummy once more.</p> + +<p>The weather had been a little cloudy all day, but as he left the +closer part of the town, the vaporous vault gave way, and the west +revealed a glorious sunset. Troubled for the trouble of little Ann, +Clare seemed drawn into the sunset. The splendour said to him: “Go on; +sorrow is but a cloud. Do the work given you to do, and the clouds +will keep moving; stop your work and the clouds will settle down +hard.”</p> + +<p>“When I was on the tramp,” thought Clare, “I always went on, and +that’s how I came here. If I hadn’t gone on, I should never have found +the darling!”</p> + +<p>As little as during any day’s tramp did he know how his reflection was +going to be justified.</p> + +<p>He wandered on, and the minutes passed slowly: it was wandering now +with no child in his arms! He was in no haste to go to the menagerie; +he would be in good time for the beasts; and the later he was, the +sooner he would see his mother alone and have a talk with her!</p> + +<p>At last, it being now quite dark, he turned, and made for the +caravans.</p> + +<p>A crowd was going up the steps, passing Mrs. Halliwell slowly, and +descending into the area surrounded by the beasts. Clare went up, and +laid his money on the little white table. The good woman took it with +a smile, threw it in her wooden bowl, and handed him, as if it had +been his change, three bright sovereigns. Clare turned his face +away. He could not take them. He felt as if it would break one bond +between them.</p> + +<p>“The money’s your own!” she said, in a low voice.</p> + +<p>“By and by, mother!” he answered.</p> + +<p>“No, no, take it now,” she insisted, in an almost angry whisper; but +the same moment threw the sovereigns among the silver, and some +coppers that lay on the table over them.</p> + +<p>Judging by her look that he had better say nothing, he turned and went +down the steps. Before he reached the bottom of them, Glum Gunn +elbowed his way past him, throwing a scowl on him from his ugly eyes +at the range of a few inches.</p> + +<p>The place was fuller than it had been all the evening, and with a +rougher sort of company. The show would close in about an hour. It +seemed to Clare not so well lighted as usual. Perhaps that was why he +did not observe that he was watched and followed by Marway, with two +others, and one burly, middle-aged, sailor-looking fellow. But I doubt +whether he would have seen them in any light, for he had no +suspicions, and was not ready to analyze a crowd and distinguish +individuals.</p> + +<p>He avoided making straight for Pummy, contenting himself for the +moment with an occasional glimpse of him between the moving heads, now +opening a vista, now closing it again, for he hoped to get gradually +nearer unseen, so as to be close to the animal when first he should +descry him, for he dreaded attracting attention by becoming, while yet +at a distance, the object of an uproarious outbreak of affection on +the part of the puma.</p> + +<p>But while he was yet a good way from him, a most ferocious yell sprang +full grown into the air, which the very fibres of his body knew as one +of the cries of the puma when most enraged. There he was on his hind +legs, ramping against the front of the cage, every hair on him +bristling, his tail lashing his flanks. The same instant arose a +commotion in the crowd behind Clare, a pushing and stooping and +swaying to and fro, with shouts of, “Here he is! here he is!”</p> + +<p>Filled with a foreboding that was almost a prescience, he fell to +forcing his way without ceremony, and had got a little nearer to the +puma, when, elbowing roughly through the spectators, with red, evil +face, in drink but not drunk, Glum Gunn appeared, almost between him +and the cage—once more, to the horror of Clare, holding by the neck +his poor little Abdiel, curled up into the shape of a flea. The brute +was making his way with him to the cage of the puma, whose wrath, +grown to an indescribable frenzy, now blazed point-blank at the dog.</p> + +<p>I think some waft of the wild odour of the menagerie must have reached +the nostrils of the loving creature, brought back old times and his +master, and waked the hope of finding him. That he had but just +arrived was plain, for he had not had time to get to his master.</p> + +<p>Clare was almost at the edge of the close-packed, staring crowd, +absorbed in the sight of the huge raving cat. Breaking through its +outermost ring in the strength of sudden terror, he darted to the cage +to reach it before Glum Gunn. A man crossed and hustled him. Gunn +opened the door of the cage, and flung Abdiel to the puma. Ere he +could close it, Clare struck him once more a stout left-hander on the +side of his head. Gunn staggered back. Clare sprang into the +cage—just as Pummy spying him uttered a jubilant roar of +recognition. His jumping into the cage just prevented the puma from +getting out, and the crowd from trampling each other to death to +escape The Christians’ Friend; but now that Clare was in, the +cage-door might have swung all night open unheeded—so long, that is, +as no dog appeared.</p> + +<p>As for Abdiel the puma had forgotten him: the dog was out of his sight +for the moment, though only behind him, while his friend and he were +rubbing recognizant noses. Abdiel showed his wisdom by keeping in the +background. The moment he was flung into the cage, he had got into a +corner of it, and stood up on his hind legs.</p> + +<p>His master believed that, knowing how the puma loved the human form +divine, he thought to prejudice him in his favour by showing how near +he could come to it. There he yet stood, his head sunk on his chest, +watching out of his eyes for the terrible moment when his enemy should +again catch sight of him.</p> + +<p>The moment came. The puma’s delight had broken out in wildest +motion. He sprang to the roof of his cage, and grappling there, looked +down with retorted neck, and saw the dog. Poor Abdiel immediately +raised his head, and in hope of propitiation all but forlorn, began a +little dance his master had taught him.</p> + +<p>What Pummy would have done with him, I fear, but I cannot tell. Clare +sprang to the rescue, and the weight of the puma’s bulk descended, not +on Abdiel, but on the shoulders of Clare who had the dog in his +bosom. In a moment more it was evidenced that a common love, however +often the cause of jealousy, is the most powerful mediator between the +generous. The puma forgot his hate, the dog forgot his fear, and +presently, to the admiration of the crowd, Clare and Pummy and Abby +were rolling over and over each other on the floor of the cage.</p> + +<p>Pummy had the best of the rough game. One moment he would be a bend in +a seemingly unloosable knot of confused animality, the next he would +be clinging to the top of his cage, where the others could not follow +him. Perhaps to have a human to play with, was even better than dreams +of loveliest frolics with brothers and sisters, and a mother as madly +merry as they, in still, moonlit nights among the rocks, where neither +sound nor scent of horse woke the devil in any of their bosoms!</p> + +<p>Glum Gunn, too angry to speak, stood watching with a scowl fit for +Lucifer when he rose from his first fall from heaven. He could do +nothing! If he touched one, all three would be upon him! Experience +had taught him what the puma would do in defence of Clare! He must +bide his time!—But he must keep hold of his chance! He drew from his +pocket his master-key, and at a moment when Clare was under the other +two, slid it into the key-hole, and locked the door of the cage. He +had him now—and his beast of a dog too! If he could have turned the +puma mad, and made him tear them both to shreds, he would not have +delayed an instant. But he must think! He must say, like Hamlet, +“About, my brains!”</p> + +<p>The man, however, who wishes to do evil, will find as ready helpers as +he who wishes to do well: in the place were those who wanted Gunn’s +aid, and would give him theirs.</p> + +<p>He felt a touch on his arm, glanced sullenly round, and saw a face +under whose beauty lay the devil. Marway, with eye and thumb, +requested him to withdraw for a moment, and he did not hesitate. As he +went he chuckled to himself at the thought of Clare when he found the +door locked.</p> + +<p>Marway’s three accomplices had drifted off one by one to wait him +outside: he rejoined them with Gunn; and, retiring a little way from +the caravans, the five held a council, the results of which make an +important part of Clare’s history.</p> + +<p>Clare seemed absorbed in his game with his four-footed, one-tailed +friends, but he was wide awake: he had Abdiel to deliver, and kept, +therefore, all the time, at least half an eye on Glum Gunn. He saw +Marway come up to him, and saw them retire together: it was the very +moment to leave the cage with Abdiel! He rose, not without difficulty, +because of the jumping of his playmates upon him and over him, and +went to the door.</p> + +<p>The moment he did so, the crowd was greatly amused to see the puma +turn upon the dog with a snarl, and the dog, at the fearful sound of +altered mood, immediately put on the man, rise to one pair of feet, +and begin to dance. The puma turned from him, went to the heel of his +chosen master, and there stood.</p> + +<p>In vain Clare endeavoured to open the gate. He had never known it +locked, and could not think when it had been done. At length, amid the +laughter of the spectators, he desisted, and the three resumed their +frolics.</p> + +<p>At this the admiration of the visitors broke out. They had seen the +door made fast, and had kept pretty quiet, waiting what would come: +they had thus earned their amusement when he sought in vain to open +it. When his withdrawal confessed him foiled, the merrier began to +mock and the ruder to jeer. But when they saw him laugh, and all three +return to their gambols, they applauded heartily.</p> + +<p>Just before this last portion of the entertainment, Mr. Halliwell, who +had been looking on for a while, retired, not knowing the cage-door +was locked. He went to his wife and said, that, if they had but the +boy and his dog again, and were but free of that brother of his, the +menagerie would be a wild-beast paradise. He would have had her go and +see the pranks in the puma’s cage, but she was too tired, she said; so +he strolled out with his pipe, and left his men to close the +exhibition. Mrs. Halliwell fastened her door and went to bed, a little +hurt that Clare did not come to her.</p> + +<p>Gradually the folk thinned away; and at last only a few who had got in +at half-price remained. To them the attendants hinted that they were +going to shut shop, and one by one they shuffled out, the readier that +Clare was now so tired that Pummy could not get up the merest tail of +a lark more. He was quite fresh himself, and had he been out in the +woods, would certainly not have gone home till morning. But he was +such a human creature that he would not insist when he saw Clare was +weary; and that he had no inclination to play with Abdiel when his +master was out of the game, was quite as well for Abdiel, for Pummy +might have forgot himself. When Abby, not free from fear, as knowing +well he was not free from danger, crept to his master’s bosom, Pummy +gave a low growl, and shoving his nose under the long body of the dog, +with one jerk threw him a yard off upon the floor, whence Abdiel +returned to content himself with his master’s feet, abandoning the +place of honour to one who knew himself stronger, and probably counted +himself better. So they all fell asleep in peace. For although Clare +knew himself and Abdiel Gunn’s prisoners, he feared no surprise with +two such rousable companions.</p> + +<figure class="figcenter illowp100" id="008" style="max-width: 62.5em;"> + <img class="w100" src="images/008.jpg" alt=""> + <figcaption class="caption"><p class="center"><span class="smcap">Clare asleep in the puma’s cage.</span></p></figcaption> +</figure> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LXIII">Chapter LXIII.<br><span class="smcap">The Dome of the Angels.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>When Clare awoke, he knew he had been asleep a long time. It was, +notwithstanding, quite dark, and there was something wrong with +him. His head ached: it had never ached before. He put out his hands: +Pummy’s hairy body was nowhere near. He called Abdiel: no whimper +answered; no cold nose was thrust into his hand. He had gone to sleep, +surely between his two friends! Could he have only dreamed it?</p> + +<p>Why was the darkness so thick? There must surely be light in the +clouds by this time! He felt half awake and half dreaming.</p> + +<p>What was the curious motion he grew aware of? Was something trying to +keep him asleep, or was something trying to wake him? Had they put him +in a big cradle? Were they heaving him about to rouse him? Or could it +be a gentle earthquake that was rocking him to and fro? Would it wake +up in earnest presently, and pull and push, and shake and rattle, +until the dome of the angels came shivering down upon him?</p> + +<p>Where was he? Not on the hard floor of Pummy’s cage, but on something +much harder—like iron. Was he in the wagon in which they carried the +things for setting up the show? Something had happened to him, and his +mother was taking him with her! But in that case he would be lying +softer! <i>She</i> would not have given him a bed so full of aches!</p> + +<p>What would they think at the bank? What would little Ann think if he +came to her no more?</p> + +<p>He could not be in a caravan; the motion was much too smooth and +pleasant for that!</p> + +<p>He put his hand to his face: what was it wet on his cheek? It did not +feel nice; it felt like blood! Had he had a blow on the head? Was that +what gave him this headache? He felt his head all over, but could find +no hurt.</p> + +<p>Why was he lying like a log, wondering and wondering, instead of +getting up and seeing what it all meant? It must be the darkness and +the headache that kept him down! The place was very close! He +<i>must</i> get out of it!</p> + +<p>He tried to get on his feet, but as he rose, his head struck +something, and he dropped back. He got again on his knees and groped +about. On all sides he was closed in. But he was not shut in a dungeon +of stone. He seemed to be in a great wooden box—small enough to be a +box, much too large for a coffin. Could it be one of the oubliettes in +the roof of the doge’s palace at Venice? He laughed at the idea, for +the motion continued, the gentle earthquake that seemed trying to rock +him to sleep: the doge’s palace could hardly be afloat on the grand +canal!</p> + +<p>What could it all mean? What would little Ann do without him? She +would not cry: she never cried—at least, he had never seen her cry! +but that would not make it easier for her!</p> + +<p>What had become of Abdiel? Had Glum Gunn got him? Then the wet on his +face was Abdiel’s blood—shed in his defence, perhaps, when his +enemies were taking him away!</p> + +<p>Fears and anxieties, such as he had never known before, began to crowd +upon him—not for himself; he was not made to think of himself, either +first or second. Something dreadful might be going on that he could +not prevent! He had never been so miserable. It was high time to do +something—to ask the great one somewhere, he did not know where, who +could somehow, he did not know how, hear the thoughts that were not +words, to do what ought to be done for little Ann, and Abdiel, and +Pummy! He prayed in his heart, lay still, and fell fast asleep.</p> + +<p>He came to himself again, in the act of drawing a deep breath of cool, +delicious air. He was no longer shut in the dark, stifling box. He was +coming alive! A comforting wind blew all about him. It was like a live +thing putting its own life into him. But his eyelids were heavy; he +was unable to open them.</p> + +<p>All at once they opened of themselves.</p> + +<p>The dome of the angels had come down and closed in round him, but +bringing room for him, taking none away. It was blue, and filled with +the loveliest white clouds, possessed by a blowing wind that never was +able to blow them away. They were of strangely regular shapes; not the +less were they alive—piled one above the other, up and up—up ever so +high! They all kept their places, and some had the loveliest blue +shadows upon them, which glided about a little. But the dome of the +angels rose high, and ever higher still, above them. The dome of the +angels was at home, and the clouds were at home in it. He gazed +entranced at the sight. Then came a sudden strong heave and roll of +the earthquake, and a light shone in his eyes that blinded him.</p> + +<p>It was but the strong friendly sun. When Clare opened his eyes again, +he knew that he was lying on the deck of one of the great ships he had +so frequently looked at from the shore. Oh, how often had he not +longed after this one and that one of them, as if in some one +somewhere, perhaps in that one, lay something he could not do without, +which yet he could never set his eyes, not to say his hands upon. He +had his heart’s desire, and what was to come of it? He lay on the +ship, and the ship lay on the sea, a little world afloat on the water, +moving as a planet moves through the heavens, but carrying her own +heaven with her, attended by her own clouds, bearing her whither she +would. Up into those clouds he lay gazing, up into the dome of the +angels, drawing deeper and deeper breaths of gladness, too happy to +think—when a foot came with a kick in the ribs, and a voice ordered +him to get up: was he going to lie there till the frigate was paid +off?</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LXIV">Chapter LXIV.<br><span class="smcap">The Panther.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Clare scrambled to his feet, and surveyed the man who had thus roused +him. He had a vague sense of having seen him before, but could not +remember where. Feeling faint, and finding himself beside a gun, he +leaned upon it.</p> + +<p>The sailor regarded him with an insolent look.</p> + +<p>“Wake up,” he said, “an’ come along to the cap’n. What’s the service a +comin’ to, I should like to know, when a beggarly shaver like you has +the cheek to stow hisself away on board one o’ his majesty’s frigates! +Wouldn’ nothin’ less suit your highness than a berth on the Panther?”</p> + +<p>“Is that the name of the ship?” asked Clare.</p> + +<p>“Yes, that’s the name of the ship!” returned the man, mimicking +him. “You’ll have the Panther, his mark, on the back o’ <i>you</i> +presently! Come along, I say, to the cap’n! We ha’ got to ask <i>him</i>, +what’s to be done wi’ rascals as rob their masters, an’ then stow +theirselves away on board his majesty’s ships!”</p> + +<p>“Take me to the captain,” said Clare.</p> + +<p>The man seemed for a moment to doubt whether there might not be some +mistake: he had expected to see him cringe. But he took him by the +collar behind, and pushed him along to the quarter-deck, where an +elderly officer was pacing up and down alone.</p> + +<p>“Well, Tom,” said the captain, stopping in his walk, “what’s the +matter? Who’s that you’ve got?”</p> + +<p>“Please yer honour,” answered the boatswain, giving Clare a shove, +“this here’s a stowaway in his majesty’s ship, Panther. I found him +snug in the cable-tier.—Salute the captain, you beggar!”</p> + +<p>Clare had no cap to lift, but he bowed like the gentleman he was. The +captain stood looking at him. Clare returned his gaze, and smiled. A +sort of tremble, much like that in the level air on a hot summer day, +went over the captain’s face, and he looked harder at Clare.</p> + +<p>A sound arose like the purring of an enormous cat, and, sure enough, +it was nothing else: chained to the foot of the forward binnacle stood +a panther, a dark yellow creature with black spots, bigger than Pummy, +swinging his tail. Clare turned at the noise he made. The panther made +a bound and a leap to the height and length of his chain, and uttered +a cry like a musical yawn. Clare stretched out his arms, and staggered +toward him. The next moment the animal had him. The captain darted to +the rescue. But the beast was only licking him wherever there was a +bare spot to lick; and Clare wondered to find how many such spots +there were: he was in rags! The panther kept tossing him over and over +as if he were a baby, licking as he tossed, and in his vibrating body +and his whole behaviour manifested an exceeding joy. The captain stood +staring “like one that hath been stunned.”</p> + +<p>The boatswain was not astonished: he had seen Clare at home among wild +animals, and thought the panther was taken with the wild-beast smell +about him.</p> + +<p>“I beg your pardon, sir,” said Clare, rolling himself out of the +panther’s reach, and rising to his feet, “but wild things like me, +somehow! I slept with a puma last night. He and this panther, sir, +would have a terrible fight if they met!”</p> + +<p>The captain threw a look of disappointment at the panther.</p> + +<p>“Go forward, Tom,” he said.</p> + +<p>The man did not like the turn things had taken, and as he went wore +something of the look of one doomed to make the acquaintance of +another kind of cat.</p> + +<p>“What made you come on board this ship, my lad?” asked the captain, in +a voice so quiet that it sounded almost kind.</p> + +<p>“I did not come on board, sir.”</p> + +<p>“Don’t trifle with <i>me</i>,” returned the captain sternly.</p> + +<p>Clare looked straight at him, and said—</p> + +<p>“I have done nothing wrong, sir. I know you will help me. I fell +asleep last night, as I told you, sir, in the cage of a puma. I knew +him, of course! How I came awake on board your ship, I know no more +than you do, sir.”</p> + +<p>The smile of Clare’s childhood had scarcely altered, and it now shone +full on the captain. He turned away, and made a tack or two on the +quarter-deck. He was a tall, thin man, with a graceful carriage, and a +little stoop in the shoulders. He had a handsome, sad face, growing +old. His hair was more than half way to gray, and he seemed somewhere +about fifty. He had the sternness of a man used to command, but under +the sternness Clare saw the sadness.</p> + +<p>The attention of the boy was now somewhat divided between the captain +and his panther, which seemed possessed with a fierce desire to get at +him, though plainly with no inimical intent. The attention of the +captain seemed divided between the boy and the panther; his eyes now +rested for a moment on the animal, now turned again to the boy. Two +officers on the port side of the quarter-deck stole glances at the +strange group—the stately, solemn, still man; the ragged creature +before him, who looked in his face without fear or anxiety, and with +just as little presumption; and the wildly excited panther, whose +fierce bounding alternated with cringing abasement of his beautiful +person, accompanied by loving sweeps of his most expressive tail.</p> + +<p>The captain made a tack or two more on the quarter-deck, then turned +sharp on the boy.</p> + +<p>“What is your name?” he asked.</p> + +<p>“I don’t quite know, sir,” answered Clare.</p> + +<p>“Come with me,” said the captain.</p> + +<p>To the surprise of the officers, he led the way to his state-room, and +the boy followed. The panther gave a howl as Clare disappeared. The +officers remarked that the captain looked strange. His lips were +compressed as if with vengeance, but the muscles of his face were +twitching.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LXV">Chapter LXV.<br><span class="smcap">At Home.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>Clare followed, wondering, but nowise anxious. He saw nothing to make +him anxious. The captain looked a good man, and a good man was a +friend to Clare! But when he entered the state-room, and saw himself +from head to foot in a mirror let into a bulkhead, he was both +startled and ashamed: how could the captain take such a scarecrow into +his room! he thought. He did not reflect that it was just the sort of +thing he did himself. He had indeed felt dirty and disreputable, and +been aware of the dry, rasping tongue of the panther on many patches +of bare skin, but he had had no idea what a wretched creature he +looked. Not one of the garments he saw in the mirror was his own, and +they were disgracefully torn. His hair was sticking out every way, and +his face smeared with blood. His feet were bare, and one trouser-leg +rent to the knee. His enemies had done their best to ensure prejudice, +and frustrate belief. They did not see in his look what no honest man +could misread. Innocent as he knew himself, he could not help feeling +for a moment disconcerted. But his faithfulness threw him on the mercy +of the man before him.</p> + +<p>The captain turned and sat down. The boy stood in the doorway, staring +at his reflex self in the mirror. The captain understood his +consternation.</p> + +<p>“Come along, my poor boy,” he said. “How did you get into this mess?”</p> + +<p>“I think I know,” answered Clare, “but I’m not sure.”</p> + +<p>“You must have been drunk,” sighed the captain.</p> + +<p>“Oh, no, sir!” returned Clare, with one of his radiant smiles. “I’ve +had but one glass of beer in my life, and I didn’t like it.”</p> + +<p>The captain smiled too, and gazed at him for several moments without +speaking.</p> + +<p>“It seems to me,” he said at last, but as if he were thinking of +something quite different, “you must be in want of food.”</p> + +<p>“Oh, no, sir!” answered Clare again, “I’m used to going without.”</p> + +<p>Like a child the sport of an evil fairy, he was again the boy of the +old wanderings, in the old, hungry times. But did he ever look so lost +as in the mirror before him? he wondered.</p> + +<p>“You haven’t told me——” said the captain, and stopped short, as if +he dreaded going further.</p> + +<p>“I will tell you anything you want to know, sir. Please ask me.”</p> + +<p>“You say you did not come on board the frigate: what am I to +understand by that?”</p> + +<p>“That I was brought, sir, in my sleep. It wouldn’t be fair, would it, +sir, to mention names, when I don’t know for certain who they were +that brought me? I never knew anything till I opened my eyes, and +thought I was in——”</p> + +<p>He paused.</p> + +<p>“<i>Where</i> did you think you were?” asked the captain eagerly.</p> + +<p>“In the dome of the angels, sir,” answered Clare.</p> + +<p>The captain’s face fell. He thought him an innocent, on whom rascals +had been playing a practical joke. But that made no difference! If he +were a simpleton, he might none the less be——! Was <i>her</i> boy left +to——?</p> + +<p>He shuddered visibly, and again was silent.</p> + +<p>“Tell me,” he said at length, “what you remember.”</p> + +<p>He meant—of the circumstances that immediately preceded his coming to +himself on board the Panther; but Clare began with the first thing his +memory presented him with. Perhaps he was yet a little dazed. He had +not got through a single sentence, when he saw that something earlier +wanted telling first; and the same thing happening again and again +within the first five minutes of his narration, sir Harry saw he had +before him a boy either of fertile imagination, or of “strange, +eventful history.” But either supposition had its difficulty. If, on +the one hand, he had had the tenth part of the experiences hinted at; +if, for one thing, he had been but a single month on the tramp, how +had he kept such an innocent face, such an angelic smile? If, on the +other hand, he was making up these tales, why did he not look sharper? +and whence the angelic smile? Did the seeming innocence indicate only +such a lack of intellect as occasionally accompanies a remarkable +individual gift? He must make him begin at the beginning, and tell +everything he knew, or might pretend to know about himself!</p> + +<p>“Stop,” he said. “You told me you did not quite know your name: what +did they call you as far back as you can remember?”</p> + +<p>“Clare Porson,” answered the boy.</p> + +<p>At the first word the captain gave a little cry, but repressed his +emotion, and went on. His face was very white, and his breath came and +went quickly.</p> + +<p>“Why did you say you did not <i>quite</i> know your name?”</p> + +<p>“My father and mother called me by their name because there was nobody +to tell them what my real name was.”</p> + +<p>“Then they weren’t your own father and mother that gave you the name?”</p> + +<p>“No, sir. I’m but using theirs till I get my own. I shall one day.”</p> + +<p>“Why do you think so?”</p> + +<p>“Don’t <i>you</i> think, sir, that everything will come right one day?”</p> + +<p>“God grant it!” responded the captain with a groan, self-reproached +for the little faith beside the strong desire.</p> + +<p>“Do you think it wrong, sir, to use a name that is not quite my own?” +said Clare. “People sometimes seem to think so.”</p> + +<p>“Not at all, my boy! You must have a name. You did not steal it. They +gave it you.”</p> + +<p>The look of the boy when he thus answered him, completely restored sir +Harry’s confidence in his mental soundness, while both the mode and +the nature of his answer to every question he put to him, bore the +strongest impress of truth.</p> + +<p>“If the boy be a liar,” he said to himself, “I will never more trust +my kind. I will turn to the wild-beasts, and believe in panthers and +hyenas!”</p> + +<p>“They did, sir,” answered Clare. “Mr. Porson gave me his own name, and +he was a clergyman. So I thought afterwards, when I had to think about +it, that it couldn’t be wrong to use it.”</p> + +<p>But how could sir Harry palter so with himself? He might have got at +the necessary facts so much quicker!</p> + +<p>Sir Harry shrank from seeing his suddenly wakened hope, dead for many +a year, crumble before his eyes. He dared not yet drive question +close.</p> + +<p>“Did Mr. Porson give you both your names?” he asked.</p> + +<p>“No, sir. My mother said I brought the first with me. She said I told +them—I don’t remember myself—that my name was Clare.”</p> + +<p>The captain drove back the words that threatened to break from his +lips in spite of him. His boy’s name was Clarence, but his mother, +whose dearest friend was a <i>Clara</i>, called her child always <i>Clare</i>!</p> + +<p>“I mean my second mother, sir,” explained Clare; “my own mother is in +the dome of the angels.”</p> + +<p>A flash lightened from the captain’s eyes, but he seemed to himself to +have gone blind. Clare saw the flash, and wondered.</p> + +<p>Again <i>the dome of the angels</i>! The words burst into meaning. Out of +the depths of the world of life rose to his mind’s eye the terrible +thing that had made him a lonely man. Again he stood with his head +thrown back, looking up at the Assumption of the Virgin painted in +that awful dome; again the earthquake seized the church, and shook the +painted heaven down upon them. He knew no more. His little boy had +been standing near him, holding his mother’s hand, but staring up like +his father!</p> + +<p>He had to force the next words from his throat.</p> + +<p>“Where did the good people who gave you their name find you?”</p> + +<p>“Sitting on my mother—my own mother. The angels fell down on her, and +when they went up again, she had got mixed with them, and went up +too.”</p> + +<p>Some people thought my friend Skymer “a little queer, you know!” I +leave my reader to his own thought: he will judge after his +kind. Clare’s father no longer doubted his perfect faculty.</p> + +<p>All through Clare’s life, as often as the old, vague, but ever ready +vision brought back its old feelings, with them came the old thoughts, +the old forms of them, and the old words their attendant shadows; and +then Clare talked like a child.</p> + +<p>The stern, sorrowful man hid his face in his hands.</p> + +<p>“Grace,” he murmured—and Clare knew somehow that he spoke to his +wife, “we have him again! We will never distrust him more!”</p> + +<p>His frame heaved with the choking of his sobs.</p> + +<p>Then Clare understood that the grand man was his father. The awe of a +perfect gladness fell upon him. He knelt before him, and laid his +hands together as in prayer.</p> + +<p>“Why did you distrust me, father?” said the half-naked outcast.</p> + +<p>“It was not my child, it was my father I distrusted. I am ashamed,” +said sir Harry, and clasped him in his arms.</p> + +<p>The boy laid his blood-stained face against his father’s bosom, and +his soul was in a better home than a sky full of angels, a home better +than the dome itself of all the angels, for his home was his father’s +heart.</p> + +<p>How long they remained thus I cannot tell. It seemed to both as if so +it had been from eternity, and so to eternity it would be. When a +thing is as it should be, then we know it is from eternity to +eternity. The true is.</p> + +<p>The father relaxed at length the arms that strained his child to his +heart. Clare looked up with white, luminous face. He gazed at his +father, cried like little Ann, “You’re come!” and slid to his feet. He +clasped and kissed and clung to them—would hardly let them go.</p> + +<p>All this time the officers on the quarter-deck were wondering what the +captain could have to do with the beggarly stowaway. The panther stood +on his feet, anxiously waiting, his ears starting at every sound. He +was longing for the boy with whom he had played, panther cub with +human infant, in the years long gone by. The sweet airs of his +childhood were to the panther plainly recognizable through all the +accretions that disfigured but could not defile him. The two were the +same age. They had rolled on floor and deck together when neither +could hurt—and now neither would. For the animal was perfectly +harmless, and chained only because apt to be unseasonably +frolicsome. When they let him loose, it was a season of high jinks and +rare skylarking. Then the men had to look out! He had twice knocked a +man overboard, and had once tumbled overboard himself. But he had +never killed a creature, was always gentle with children, and might be +trusted to look after any infant.</p> + +<p>Sir Harry raised his son, kissed him, set him on his own chair, and +retired into an inner cabin.</p> + +<p>A knock came to the door. Clare said, “Come in.” The quartermaster +entered. Instead of sir Harry, he saw the miserable stowaway, seated +in the captain’s own chair. He swore at him, and ordered him out, +prepared to give him a kick as he passed.</p> + +<p>“Out with you!” he cried. “Go for’ard. Tell the bo’s’n to look out a +rope’s end. I’ll be after you.”</p> + +<p>“The captain told me to sit here,” answered Clare, and sat.</p> + +<p>The officer looked closer at him, begged his pardon, saluted, and +withdrew.</p> + +<p>The father heard, and said to himself, “The boy is a gentleman: he +knows where to take his orders.”</p> + +<p>He called him into the inner cabin, and there washed him from head to +foot, rejoicing to find under his rags a skin as clean as his own.</p> + +<p>“Now what are we to do for clothes, Clare?” said sir Harry.</p> + +<p>“Perhaps somebody would lend me some,” answered Clare. “Mayn’t I be +your cabin-boy, father? You will let me be a sailor, won’t you, and +sail always with you?”</p> + +<p>“You shall be a sailor, my boy,” answered sir Harry, “and sail with me +as long as God pleases. You know to obey orders!”</p> + +<p>“I will obey the cook if you tell me, father.”</p> + +<p>“You shall obey nobody but myself,” returned sir Harry; “—and the +lord high admiral,” he added, with a glance upward, and a smile like +his son’s.</p> + +<p>For that day Clare kept to the captain’s state-room; the next, he went +on deck in a midshipman’s uniform, which he wore like a gentleman that +could obey orders.</p> + + +<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop"> + +<div class="chapter"> +<h2 class="nobreak" id="Chapter_LXVI">Chapter LXVI.<br><span class="smcap">The End of Clare Skymer’s Boyhood.</span></h2></div> + + +<p>His father had a hammock slung for him in the state-room; he could not +be parted from him even when they slept.</p> + +<p>One night sir Harry, lying awake, heard a movement in the state-room, +and got up. It was a still, star-lit night. The frigate was dreaming +away northward with all sail set. Through the windows shone the level +stars. From a beam above hung a dim lamp. He could see no one. He went +to the hammock. There was no boy in it. Then he spied him, kneeling +under the stern-windows, with his head down.</p> + +<p>“Anything the matter, Clare?” he asked.</p> + +<p>“No, father.”</p> + +<p>“What are you doing?”</p> + +<p>“Trying to say <i>Thank you for my father!</i>”</p> + +<p>“Oh, thank him, thank him, my boy!” returned sir Harry. “Thank him +with all your heart. He will give us <i>her</i> some day!”</p> + +<p>“Yes, father, he will!” responded Clare.</p> + +<p>His father knelt beside him, but neither said word that the other +heard.</p> + +<p>The next night, Clare was on the quarter-deck with his father, and +heard him give certain orders to the officers of the watch. He had +never heard orders given in such a way: he spoke so quietly, so +directly, so simply! The night was gusty and dark, threatening foul +weather. The captain measured the quarter-deck as when first Clare saw +him, but with a mien how different! He walked as slow and stately as +before, but with a look almost of triumph in his eyes, glancing often +at the clouds. The thought of having such a father made Clare tremble +with delight from head to foot. His father was the power of the +sea-planet that bore them! Him the great vessel, and all aboard of +her, obeyed! He was the life of her motions, the soul of her! At his +pleasure she bowed her obedient head, and swept over the seas! Clare’s +heart swelled within him.</p> + +<p>But this father had, the night before, knelt with him in the presence +of one unseen, worshipping and thanking a higher than himself! As the +captain of the Panther sailed his frigate through the seas, so the +great father, the father of his father, the father of all fathers, to +whom the captain kneeled as a little child, sailed through the heaven +of heavens the huge ship of the world, guided fleet upon fleet +innumerable through trackless space! And over an infinitely grander +sea than the measureless ocean of worlds, the Father was carrying +navies of human souls, every soul a world whose affairs none but the +Father could understand, through many a storm, and waterspout, and +battle with the powers of evil, safe to the haven of the children, the +Father’s house! And Clare began to understand that so it was.</p> + +<p>One day his father said to him—</p> + +<p>“Clare, whatever you forget, whatever you remember, mind this—that +you and I and your mother are the children of one father, and that we +have all three to be good children to that father. If we do as he +tells us, he will bring us all at length to the same port. Our admiral +is Jesus Christ. We take our orders from him. But each has to sail his +own ship.”</p> + +<p>The boatswain shook in his wide shoes, but Clare never showed him the +least disfavour. He recognized at once the two officers he had seen at +the menagerie, but beyond giving each a look he could hardly mistake, +he showed no sign of having any knowledge of them.</p> + +<p>He set himself to be a sailor, and learned fast. I need scarcely say +he was as precise in obeying any superior officer as the best sailor +on board. In a few weeks he felt and looked to the manner born—as +indeed he was, for not only his father, but his grandfather, and his +great-grandfather, and more yet of his ancestors,—how many I do not +know, were sailors.</p> + +<p>He had had a rough shaking. The earthquake had come and gone, and come +again and gone a many times. But the shaking earth was his nurse, and +she taught him to dwell in a world that cannot be shaken.</p> + + +<div style='display:block; margin-top:4em'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG A ROUGH SHAKING ***</div> +<div style='text-align:left'> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Updated editions will replace the previous one—the old editions will +be renamed. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright +law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, +so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United +States without permission and without paying copyright +royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part +of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project +Gutenberg™ electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG™ +concept and trademark. 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Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..828f77f --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #8886 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/8886) diff --git a/old/8886-0.txt b/old/8886-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..eef0fbc --- /dev/null +++ b/old/8886-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,12755 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Rough Shaking, by George MacDonald + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: A Rough Shaking + +Author: George MacDonald + + +Release Date: September, 2005 [EBook #8886] +This file was first posted on August 20, 2003 +Last Updated: March 9, 2018 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: UTF-8 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A ROUGH SHAKING *** + + + + +Produced by Distributed Proofreaders + + + + + + + +A ROUGH SHAKING + +By George MacDonald + + + +Contents. + + Chap. + I. How I came to know Clare Skymer + II. With his parents + III. Without his parents + IV. The new family + V. His new home + VI. What did draw out his first smile + VII. Clare and his brothers + VIII. Clare and his human brothers + IX. Clare the defender + X. The black aunt + XI. Clare on the farm + XII. Clare becomes a guardian of the poor + XIII. Clare the vagabond + XIV. Their first helper + XV. Their first host + XVI. On the tramp + XVII. The baker's cart + XVIII. Beating the town + XIX. The blacksmith and his forge + XX. Tommy reconnoitres + XXI. Tommy is found and found out + XXII. The smith in a rage + XXIII. Treasure trove + XXIV. Justifiable burglary + XXV. A new quest + XXVI. A new entrance + XXVII. The baby has her breakfast + XXVIII. Treachery + XXIX. The baker + XXX. The draper + XXXI. An addition to the family + XXXII. Shop and baby + XXXIII. A bad penny + XXXIV. How things went for a time + XXXV. Clare disregards the interests of his employers + XXXVI. The policeman + XXXVII. The magistrate + XXXVIII. The workhouse + XXXIX. Away + XL. Maly + XLI. The caravans + XLII. Nimrod + XLIII. Across country + XLIV. A third mother + XLV. The menagerie + XLVI. The angel of the wild beasts + XLVII. Glum Gunn + XLVIII. The Puma + XLIX. Glum Gunn's revenge + L. Clare seeks help + LI. Clare a true master + LII. Miss Tempest + LIII. The gardener + LIV. The kitchen + LV. The wheel rests for a time + LVI. Strategy + LVII. Ann Shotover + LVIII. Child-talk + LIX. Lovers' walks + LX. The shoe-black + LXI. A walk with consequences + LXII. The cage of the puma + LXIII. The dome of the angels + LXIV. The panther + LXV. At home + LXVI. The end of Clare Skymer's boyhood + + + Illustrations. + + Clare, Tommy, and the baby in custody + Mrs. Porson finds Clare by the side of his dead mother + Clare is heard talking to Maly + Clare makes friends during Mr. Porson's absence + The blacksmith gives Clare and Tommy a rough greeting + Clare and Abdiel at the locked pump + Clare proceeds to untie the ropes from the ring in the bull's nose + Clare finds the advantage of a powerful friend + The gardener's discomfiture + Clare asks Miss Shotover to let him carry Ann home + Clare is found giving the shoeblack a lesson + Clare asleep in the puma's cage + + + +Dedicated to my great-nephew, Norman MacKay Binney, aged seven, +because his Godfather and Godmother love him dearly. + +Hampstead, August 26, 1890. + + + + +A ROUGH SHAKING. + + + +Chapter I. + +How I Came to know Clare Skymer. + + +It was a day when everything around seemed almost perfect: everything +does, now and then, come nearly right for a moment or two, preparatory +to coming all right for good at the last. It was the third week in +June. The great furnace was glowing and shining in full force, driving +the ship of our life at her best speed through the ocean of space. For +on deck, and between decks, and aloft, there is so much more going on +at one time than at another, that I may well say she was then going at +her best speed, for there is quality as well as rate in motion. The +trees were all well clothed, most of them in their very best. Their +garments were soaking up the light and the heat, and the wind was +going about among them, telling now one and now another, that all was +well, and getting through an immense amount of comfort-work in a +single minute. It said a word or two to myself as often as it passed +me, and made me happier than any boy I know just at present, for I was +an old man, and ought to be more easily made happy than any mere +beginner. + +I was walking through the thin edge of a little wood of big trees, +with a slope of green on my left stretching away into the sunny +distance, and the shadows of the trees on my right lying below my +feet. The earth and the grass and the trees and the air were together +weaving a harmony, and the birds were leading the big orchestra--which +was indeed on the largest scale. For the instruments were so +different, that some of them only were meant for sound; the part of +others was in odour, of others yet in shine, and of still others in +motion; while the birds turned it all as nearly into words as they +could. Presently, to complete the score, I heard the tones of a man's +voice, both strong and sweet. It was talking to some one in a way I +could not understand. I do not mean I could not understand the words: +I was too far off even to hear them; but I could not understand how +the voice came to be so modulated. It was deep, soft, and musical, +with something like coaxing in it, and something of tenderness, and +the intent of it puzzled me. For I could not conjecture from it the +age, or sex, or relation, or kind of the person to whom the words were +spoken. You can tell by the voice when a man is talking to himself; it +ought to be evident when he is talking to a woman; and you can, +surely, tell when he is talking to a child; you could tell if he were +speaking to him who made him; and you would be pretty certain if he +was holding communication with his dog: it made me feel strange that I +could not tell the kind of ear open to the gentle manly voice saying +things which the very sound of them made me long to hear. I confess to +hurrying my pace a little, but I trust with no improper curiosity, to +see--I cannot say the interlocutors, for I had heard, and still heard, +only one voice. + +About a minute's walk brought me to the corner of the wood where it +stopped abruptly, giving way to a field of beautiful grass; and then I +saw something it does not need to be old to be delighted withal: the +boy that would not have taken pleasure in it, I should count half-way +to the gallows. Up to the edge of the wood came, I say, a large +field--acres on acres of the sweetest grass; and dividing it from both +wood and path stood a fence of three bars, which at the moment +separated two as genuine lovers as ever wall of “stones with lime and +hair knit up” could have sundered. On one side of the fence stood a +man whose face I could not see, and on the other one of the loveliest +horses I had ever set eyes upon. I am no better than a middling fair +horseman, but, for this horse's sake, I may be allowed to mention that +my friends will all have me look at any horse they think of buying. +He was over sixteen hands, with well rounded barrel, clean limbs, +small head, and broad muzzle; hollows above his eyes of hazy blue, and +delicacy of feature, revealed him quite an old horse. His ears pointed +forward and downward, as if they wanted on their own account to get a +hold of the man the nose was so busily caressing. Neither, I presume, +had heard my approach; for all true-love-endearments are shy, and the +man had his arm round the horse's neck, and was caressing his face, +talking to him much as Philip Sidney's lady, whose lips “seemed at +once to kiss and speak,” murmured to her pet sparrow, only here the +voice was a musical baritone. That there was something between them +more than an ordinary person would be likely to understand appeared +patent. + +Whether or not I made an involuntary sound I cannot tell: I was so +taken with the sight, bearing to me an aspect of something eternal, +that I do not know how I carried myself; but the horse gave a little +start, half lifted his head, saw me, threw it up, uttered a shrill +neigh of warning, stepped hack a pace, and stood motionless, waiting +apparently for an order from his master--if indeed I ought not rather +to call them friends than master and servant. + +The man looked round, saw me, turned toward me, and showing no sign +that my appearance was unexpected, lifted his hat with a courtesy most +Englishmen would reserve for a lady, and advanced a step, almost as if +to welcome a guest. I may have owed something of this reception to the +fact that he saw before him a man advanced in years, for my beard is +very gray, and that by no means prematurely. I saw before me one +nearly, if not quite as old as myself. His hair and beard, both rather +long, were quite white. His face was wonderfully handsome, with the +stillness of a summer sea upon it. Its features were very marked and +regular and fine, for the habit of the man was rather spare. What with +his white hair and beard, and a certain radiance in his pale +complexion, which, I learned afterward, no sun had ever more than +browned a little, he reminded me for a moment as he turned, of Cato on +the shore of Dante's purgatorial island. + +“I fear,” I said, “I have intruded!” There was no path where I had +come along. + +The man laughed--and his laugh was more friendly than an invitation to +dinner. + +“The land is mine,” he answered; “no one can say you intrude.” + +“Thank you heartily. I live not very far off, and know the country +pretty well, but have got into a part of which I am ignorant.” + +“You are welcome to go where you will on my property,” he answered. +“I could not close a field without some sense of having thrown a +fellow-being into a dungeon. Whatever be the rights of land, space can +belong to the individual only '_as it were_,' to use a Shakspere-phrase. +All the best things have to be shared. The house plainly was designed +for a family.” + +While he spoke I scarce heeded his words for looking at the man, so +much he interested me. His face was of the palest health, with a faint +light from within. He looked about sixty years of age. His forehead +was square, and his head rather small, but beautifully modelled; his +eyes were of a light hazel, friendly as those of a celestial +dog. Though slender in build, he looked strong, and every movement +denoted activity. + +I was not ready with an answer to what he said. He turned from me, and +as if to introduce a companion and so render the interview easier, he +called, in tone as gentle as if he spoke to a child, but with that +peculiar intonation that had let me understand it was not to a child +he was speaking, “Memnon! come;” and turned again to me. His movement +and words directed my attention again to the horse, who had stood +motionless. At once, but without sign of haste, the animal walked up +to the rails, rose gently on his hind legs, came over without +touching, walked up to his master, and laid his head on his shoulder. + +I bethought me now who the man was. He had been but a year or two in +the neighbourhood, though the property on which we now stood had been +his own for a good many years. Some said he had bought it; others knew +he had inherited it. All agreed he was a very peculiar person, with +ways so oddly unreasonable that it was evident he had, in his +wanderings over the face of the earth, gradually lost hold of what +sense he might at one time have possessed, and was in consequence a +good deal cracked. There seemed nothing, however, in his behaviour or +appearance to suggest such a conclusion: a man could hardly be counted +beside himself because he was on terms of friendship with his +horse. It took me but a moment to recall his name--Skymer--one odd +enough to assist the memory. I caught it ere he had done mingling +fresh caresses with those of his long-tailed friend. When I came to +know him better, I knew that he had thus given me opportunity--such as +he would to a horse--of thinking whether I should like to know him +better: Mr. Skymer's way was not to offer himself, but to give easy +opportunity to any who might wish to know him. I learned afterward +that he knew my name and suspected my person: being rather prejudiced +in my favour because of the kind of thing I wrote, he was now waiting +to see whether approximation would follow. + +“Pardon my rude lingering,” I said; “that lovely animal is enough to +make one desire nearer acquaintance with his owner. I don't think I +ever saw such a perfect creature!” + +I remembered the next moment that I had heard said of Mr. Skymer that +he liked beasts better than men, but I soon found this was only one of +the foolish things constantly said of honest men by those who do not +understand them. + +There are women even who love dogs and dislike children; but, nauseous +fact as this is, it is not so nauseous as the fact that there are men +who believe in no animal rights, or in any God of the animals, and +think we may do what we please with them, indulging at their cost an +insane thirst after knowledge. Injustice may discover facts, but never +truth. + +“I grant him nearly a perfect creature,” he answered, “But he is far +more nearly perfect than you yet know him! Excuse me for speaking so +confidently; but if we were half as far on for men, as Memnon is for a +horse, the kingdom of heaven would be a good deal nearer!” + +“He seems an old horse!” + +“He is an old horse--much older than you can think after seeing him +come over that paling as he did. He is forty.” + +“Is it possible!” + +“I know and can prove his age as certainly as my own. He is the son of +an Arab mare and an English thoroughbred.--Come here, Memnon!” + +The horse, who had been standing behind like a servant in waiting, put +his beautiful head over his master's shoulder. + +“Memnon,” said Mr. Skymer, “go home and tell Mrs. Waterhouse I hope to +bring a gentleman with me to lunch.” + +The horse walked gently past us, then started at a quick trot, which +almost immediately became a gallop. + +“The dear fellow,” said his master, “would not gallop like that if he +were on the hard road; he knows I would not like it.” + +“But, excuse me, how can the animal convey your message?--how +communicate what he knows, if he does understand what you say to him?” + +“He will at least take care that the housekeeper look in his mane for +the knot which perhaps you did not observe me tie in it.” + +“You have a code of signals by knots then?” + +“Yes--comprising about half a dozen possibilities.--I hope you do not +object to the message I sent! You will do me the honour of lunching +with me?” + +“You are most kind,” I answered--with a little hesitation, I suppose, +fearing to bore my new acquaintance. + +“Don't make me false to horse and housekeeper, Mr. Gowrie,” he +resumed.--“I put the horse first, because I could more easily explain +the thing to Mrs. Waterhouse than to Memnon.” + +“Could you explain it to Memnon?” + +“I should have a try!” he answered, with a peculiar smile. + +“You hold yourself bound then to keep faith with your horse?” + +“Bound just as with a man--that is, as far as the horse can understand +me. A word understood is binding, whether spoken to horse, or man, or +pig. It makes it the more important that we can do so little, must +work so slowly, for the education of the lower animals. It seems to me +an absolute horror that a man should lie to an inferior creature. Just +think--if an angel were to lie to us! What a shock to find we had been +reposing faith in a devil.” + +“Excuse me--I thought you said _an angel_!” + +“When he lied, would he not be a devil?--But let us follow Memnon, and +as we walk I will tell you more about him.” + +He turned to the wood. + +“The horse,” I said, pointing, “went that way!” + +“Yes,” answered his master; “he knew it was nearer for him to take the +long way round. If I had started him and one of the dogs together, the +horse would have gone that way, and the dog taken the path we are now +following.” + +We walked a score or two of yards in silence. + +“You promised to tell me more about your wonderful horse!” I said. + +“With pleasure. I delight in talking about my poor brothers and +sisters! Most of them are only savages yet, but there would be far +fewer such if we did not treat them as slaves instead of friends. One +day, however, all will be well for them as for us--thank God.” + +“I hope so,” I responded heartily. “But please tell me,” I said, +“something more about your Memnon.” + +Mr. Skymer thought for a moment. + +“Perhaps, after all,” he rejoined, “his best accomplishment is that he +can fetch and carry like a dog. I will tell you one of his feats that +way. But first you must know that, having travelled a good deal, and +in some wild countries, I have picked up things it is well to know, +even if not the best of their kind. A man may fail by not knowing the +second best! I was once out on Memnon, five and twenty miles from +home, when I came to a cottage where I found a woman lying ill. I saw +what was wanted. The country was strange to me, and I could not have +found a doctor. I wrote a little pencil-note, fastened it to the +saddle, and told the horse to go home and bring me what the +housekeeper gave him--and not to spare himself. He went off at a +steady trot of ten or twelve miles an hour. I went into the cottage, +and, awaiting his return, did what I could for the woman. I confess I +felt anxious!” + +“You well might,” I said: “why should you say _confess_?” + +“Because I had no business to be anxious.” + +“It was your business to do all for her you could.” + +“I was doing that! If I hadn't been, I should have had good cause to +be anxious! But I knew that another was looking after her; and to be +anxious was to meddle with his part!” + +“I see now,” I answered, and said nothing more for some time. + +“What a lather poor Memnon came back in! You should have seen him! He +had been gone nearly five hours, and neither time nor distance +accounted for the state he was in. I did not let him do anything for a +week. I should have had to sit up with him that night, if I had not +been sitting up at any rate. The poor fellow had been caught, and had +made his escape. His bridle was broken, and there were several long +skin wounds in his belly, as if he had scraped the top of a wall set +with bits of glass. How far he had galloped, there was no telling.” + +“Not in vain, I hope! The poor woman?” + +“She recovered. The medicine was all right in a pocket under the flap +of the saddle. Before morning she was much better, and lived many +years after. Memnon and I did not lose sight of her.--But you should +have seen the huge creature lying on the floor of that cabin like a +worn-out dog, abandoned and content! I rubbed him down carefully, as +well as I could, and tied my poncho round him, before I let him go to +sleep. Then as soon as my patient seemed quieted for the night, I made +up a big fire of her peats, and they slept like two babies, only they +both snored.--The woman beat,” he added with a merry laugh. “It was +the first, almost the only time I ever heard a horse snore.--As we +walked home next day he kept steadily behind me. In general we walked +side by side. Either he felt too tired to talk to me, or he was not +satisfied with himself because of something that had happened the day +before. Perhaps he had been careless, and so allowed himself to be +taken. I do not think it likely.” + +“What a loss it will be to you when he dies!” I said. + +He looked grave for an instant, then replied cheerfully-- + +“Of course I shall miss the dear fellow--but not more than he will +miss me; and it will be good for us both.” + +“Then,” said I,--a little startled, I confess, “you really think--” + and there I stopped. + +“Do _you_ think, Mr. Gowrie,” he rejoined, answering my unpropounded +question, “that a God like Jesus Christ, would invent such a delight +for his children as the society and love of animals, and then let +death part them for ever? I don't.” + +“I am heartily willing to be your disciple in the matter,” I replied. + +“I know well,” he resumed, “the vulgar laugh that serves the poor +public for sufficient answer to anything, and the common-place retort: +'You can't give a shadow of proof for your theory!'--to which I +answer, 'I never was the fool to imagine I could; but as surely as you +go to bed at night expecting to rise again in the morning, so surely +do I expect to see my dear old Memnon again when I wake from what so +many Christians call the sleep that knows no waking.'--Think, +Mr. Gowrie, just think of all the children in heaven--what a +superabounding joy the creatures would be to them!--There is one +class, however,” he went on, “which I should like to see wait a while +before they got their creatures back;--I mean those foolish women who, +for their own pleasure, so spoil their dogs that they make other +people hate them, doing their best to keep them from rising in the +scale of God's creation.” + +“They don't know better!” I said. For every time he stopped, I wanted +to hear what he would say next. + +“True,” he answered; “but how much do they want to know the right way +of anything? They have good and lovely instincts--like their dogs, but +do they care that there is a right way and a wrong way of following +them?” + +We walked in silence, and were now coming near the other side of the +small wood. + +“I hope I shall not interfere with your plans for the day!” I said. + +“I seldom have any plans for the day,” he answered. “Or if I have, +they are made to break easily. In general I wait. The hour brings its +plans with it--comes itself to tell me what is wanted of me. It has +done so now. And see, there is Memnon again in attendance on us!” + +There, sure enough, was the horse, on the other side of the paling +that here fenced the wood from a well-kept country-road. His long neck +was stretched over it toward his master. + +“Memnon,” said Mr. Skymer as we issued by the gate, “I want you to +carry this gentleman home.” + +I had often enough in my youth ridden without a saddle, but seldom +indeed without some sort of bridle, however inadequate: I did not, at +the first thought of the thing, relish mounting without one a horse of +which all I knew was that he and his master were on better terms than +I had ever seen man and horse upon before. But even while the thought +was passing through my head, Memnon was lying at my feet, flat as his +equine rotundity would permit. Ashamed of my doubt, I lost not a +moment in placing myself in the position suggested by Sir John +Falstaff to Prince Hal for the defence of his own bulky +carcase--astride the body of the animal, namely. At once he rose and +lifted me into the natural relation of man and horse. Then he looked +round at his master, and they set off at a leisurely pace. + +“You have me captive!” I said. + +“Memnon and I,” answered Mr. Skymer, “will do what we can to make your +captivity pleasant.” + +A silence followed my thanks. In this procession of horse and foot, we +went about half a mile ere anything more was said worth setting +down. Then began evidence that we were drawing nigh to a house: the +grassy lane between hedges in which we had been moving, was gradually +changing its character. First came trees in the hedge-rows. Then the +hedges gave way to trees--a grand avenue of splendid elms and beeches +alternated. The ground under our feet was the loveliest sward, and +between us and the sun came the sweetest shadow. A glad heave but +instant subsidence of the live power under me, let me know Memnon's +delight at feeling the soft elastic turf under his feet: he had said +to himself, “Now we shall have a gallop!” but immediately checked the +thought with the reflection that he was no longer a colt ignorant of +manners. + +“What a lovely road the turf makes!” I said. “It is a lower +sky--solidified for feet that are not yet angelic.” + +My host looked up with a brighter smile than he had shown before. + +“It is the only kind of road I really like,” he said, “--though turf +has its disadvantages! I have as much of it about the place as it will +bear. Such roads won't do for carriages!” + +“You ride a good deal, I suppose?” + +“I do. I was at one time so accustomed to horseback that, without +thinking, I was not aware whether I was on my horse's feet or my own.” + +“Where, may I ask, does my friend who is now doing me the favour to +carry 'this weight and size,' come from?” + +“He was born in England, but his mother was a Syrian--of one of the +oldest breeds there known. He was born into my arms, and for a week +never touched the ground. Next month, as I think I mentioned, he will +be forty years old!” + +“It is a great age for a horse!” I said. + +“The more the shame as well as the pity!” he answered. + +“Then you think horses might live longer?” + +“Much longer than they are allowed to live in this country,” he +answered. “And a part of our punishment is that we do not know +them. We treat them so selfishly that they do not live long enough to +become our friends. At present there are but few men worthy of their +friendship. What else is a man's admiration, when it is without love +or respect or justice, but a bitter form of despite! It is small +wonder there should be so many stupid horses, when they receive so +little education, have such bad associates, and die so much too young +to have gained any ripe experience to transmit to their +posterity. Where would humanity be now, if we all went before +five-and-twenty?” + +“I think you must be right. I have myself in my possession at this +moment, given me by one who loved her, an ink-stand made from the hoof +of a pony that died at the age of at least forty-two, and did her part +of the work of a pair till within a year or two of her death.--Poor +little Zephyr!” + +“Why, Mr. Gowrie, you talk of her as if she were a Christian!” + exclaimed Mr. Skymer. + +“That's how you talked of Memnon a moment ago! Where is the +difference? Not in the size, though Memnon would make three of +Zephyr!” + +“I didn't say _poor Memnon_, did I? You said _poor Zephyr_! That is +the way Christians talk about their friends gone home to the grand old +family mansion! Why they do, they would hardly like one to tell them!” + +“It is true,” I responded. “I understand you now! I don't think I ever +heard a widow speak of her departed husband without putting _poor_, or +_poor dear_, before his name.--By the way, when you hear a woman speak +of her _late_ husband, can you help thinking her ready to marry +again?” + +“It does sound as if she had done with him! But here we are at the +gate!--Call, Memnon.” + +The horse gave a clear whinny, gentle, but loud enough to be heard at +some distance. It was a tall gate of wrought iron, but Memnon's +summons was answered by one who could clear it--though not open it any +more than he: a little bird, which I was not ornithologist enough to +recognize--mainly because of my short-sightedness, I hope--came +fluttering from the long avenue within, perched on the top of the +gate, looked down at our party for a moment as if debating the +prudent, dropped suddenly on Memnon's left ear, and thence to his +master's shoulder, where he sat till the gate was opened. The little +one went half-way up the inner avenue with us, making several flights +and returns before he left us. + +The boy that opened the gate, a chubby little fellow of seven, looked +up in Mr. Skymer's face as if he had been his father and king in one, +and stood gazing after him as long as he was in sight. I noticed +also--who could have failed to notice?--that every now and then a bird +would drop from the tree we were passing under, and alight for a +minute on my host's head. Once when he happened to uncover it, seven +or eight perched together upon it. One tiny bird got caught in his +beard by the claws. + +“You cannot surely have tamed _all_ the birds in your grounds!” I +said. + +“If I have,” he answered, “it has been by permitting them to be +themselves.” + +“You mean it is the nature of birds to be friendly with man?” + +“I do. Through long ages men have been their enemies, and so have +alienated them--they too not being themselves.” + +“You mean that unfriendliness is not natural to men?” + +“It cannot be human to be cruel!” + +“How is it, then, that so many boys are careless what suffering they +inflict?” + +“Because they have in them the blood of men who loved cruelty, and +never repented of it.” + +“But how do you account for those men loving cruelty--for their being +what you say is contrary to their nature?” + +“Ah, if I could account for that, I should be at the secret of most +things! All I meant to half-explain was, how it came that so many who +have no wish to inflict suffering, yet are careless of inflicting it.” + +I saw that we must know each other better before he would quite open +his mind to me. I saw that though, hospitable of heart, he threw his +best rooms open to all, there were others in his house into which he +did not invite every acquaintance. + +The avenue led to a wide gravelled space before a plain, low, long +building in whitish stone, with pillared portico. In the middle of the +space was a fountain, and close to it a few chairs. Mr. Skymer begged +me to be seated. Memnon walked up to the fountain, and lay down, that +I might get off his back as easily as I had got on it. Once down, he +turned on his side, and lay still. + +“The air is so mild,” said my host, “I fancy you will prefer this to +the house.” + +“Mild!” I rejoined; “I should call it hot!” + +“I have been so much in real heat!” he returned. “Notwithstanding my +love of turf, I keep this much in gravel for the sake of the desert.” + +I took the seat he offered me, wondering whether Memnon was +comfortable where he lay; and, absorbed in the horse, did not see my +host go to the other side of the basin. Suddenly we were “clothed +upon” with a house which, though it came indeed from the earth, might +well have come direct from heaven: a great uprush of water spread +above us a tent-like dome, through which the sun came with a cool, +broken, almost frosty glitter. We seemed in the heart of a huge +soap-bubble. I exclaimed with delight. + +“I thought you would enjoy my sun-shade!” said Mr. Skymer. “Memnon and +I often come here of a hot morning, when nobody wants us. Don't we, +Memnon?” + +The horse lifted his nose a little, and made a low soft noise, a chord +of mingled obedience and delight--a moan of pleasure mixed with a +half-born whinny. + +We had not been seated many moments, and had scarcely pushed off the +shore of silence into a new sea of talk, when we were interrupted by +the invasion of half a dozen dogs. They were of all sorts down to no +sort. Mr. Skymer called one of them Tadpole--I suppose because he had +the hugest tail, while his legs were not visible without being looked +for. + +“That animal,” said his master, “--he looks like a dog, but who would +be positive what he was!--is the cleverest in the pack. He seems to me +a rare individuality. His ancestors must have been of all sorts, and +he has gathered from them every good quality possessed by each. Think +what a man might be--made up that way!” + +“Why is there no such man?” I said. + +“There may be some such men. There must be many one day,” he answered, +“--but not for a while yet. Men must first be made willing to be +noble.” + +“And you don't think men willing to be made noble?” + +“Oh yes! willing enough, some of them, to be _made_ noble!” + +“I do not understand. I thought you said they were not!” + +“They are willing enough _to be made_ noble; but that is very +different from being willing _to be_ noble: that takes trouble. How +can any one become noble who desires it so little as not to fight for +it!” + +The man drew me more and more. He had a way of talking about things +seldom mentioned except in dull fashion in the pulpit, as if he cared +about them. He spoke as of familiar things, but made you feel he was +looking out of a high window. There are many who never speak of real +things except in a false tone; this man spoke of such without an atom +of assumed solemnity--in his ordinary voice: they came into his mind +as to their home--not as dreams of the night, but as facts of the day. + +I sat for a while, gazing up through the thin veil of water at the +blue sky so far beyond. I thought how like that veil was to our little +life here, overdomed by that boundless foreshortening of space. The +lines in Shelley's _Adonais_ came to me: + + “Life, like a dome of many-coloured glass, + Stains the white radiance of Eternity, + Until Death tramples it to fragments.” + +Then I thought of what my host had said concerning the too short lives +of horses, and wondered what he would say about those of dogs. + +“Dogs are more intelligent than horses,” I said: “why do they live a +yet shorter time?” + +“I doubt if you would say so in an Arab's tent,” he returned. “If you +had said, 'still more affectionate,' I should have known better how to +answer you.” + +“Then I do say so,” I replied. + +“And I return, that is just why they live no longer. They do not find +the world good enough for them, die, and leave it.” + +“They have a much happier life than horses!” + +“Many dogs than some horses, I grant.” + +That instant arose what I fancied must be an unusual sound in the +place: two of the dogs were fighting. The master got up. I thought +with myself, “Now we shall see his notions of discipline!” nor had I +long to wait. In his hand was a small riding-whip, which I afterward +found he always carried in avoidance of having to inflict a heavier +punishment from inability to inflict a lighter; for he held that in +all wrong-doing man can deal with, the kindest thing is not only to +punish, but, with animals especially, to punish at once. He ran to the +conflicting parties. They separated the moment they heard the sound of +his coming. One came cringing and crawling to his feet; the other--it +was the nondescript Tadpole--stood a little way off, wagging his tail, +and cocking his head up in his master's face. He gave the one at his +feet several pretty severe cuts with the whip, and sent him off. The +other drew nearer. His master turned away and took no notice of him. + +“May I ask,” I said, when he returned to his seat, “why you did not +punish both the animals for their breach of the peace?” + +“They did not both deserve it.” + +“How could you tell that? You were not looking when the quarrel +began!” + +“Ah, but you see I know the dogs! One of them--I saw at a glance how +it was--had found a bone, and dog-rule about finding is, that what you +find is yours. The other, notwithstanding, wanted a share. It was +Tadpole who found the bone, and he--partly from his sense of +justice--cannot endure to have his claims infringed upon. Every dog of +them knows that Tadpole must be in the right.” + +“He looked as if he expected you to approve of his conduct!” + +“Yes, that is the worst of Tadpole! he is so self-righteous as to +imagine he deserves praise for standing on his rights! He is but a +dog, you see, and knows no better!” + +“I noticed you disregarded his appeal.” + +“I was not going to praise him for nothing!” + +“You expect them to understand your treatment?” + +“No one can tell how infinitesimally small the beginnings of +understanding, as of life, may be. The only way to make animals +reasonable--more reasonable, I mean--is to treat them as +reasonable. Until you can go down into the abysses of creation, you +cannot know when a nature begins to see a difference in quality +of action.” + +“I confess,” I said, “Mr. Tadpole did seem a little ashamed as he went +away.” + +“And you see Blanco White at my feet, taking care not to touch +them. He is giving time, he thinks, for my anger to pass.” + +He laughed the merriest laugh. The dog looked up eagerly, but dropped +his head again. + +If I go on like this, however, I shall have to take another book to +tell the story for which I began the present! In short, I was drawn to +the man as never to another since the friend of my youth went where I +shall go to seek and find him one day--or, more likely, one solemn +night. I was greatly his inferior, but love is a quick divider of +shares: he that gathers much has nothing over, and he that gathers +little has no lack. I soon ceased to think of him as my _new_ friend, +for I seemed to have known him before I was born. + +I am going to tell the early part of his history. If only I could tell +it as it deserves to be told! The most interesting story may be so +narrated as that only the eyes of a Shakspere could spy the shine +underneath its dull surface. + +He never told me any great portion of the tale of his life +continuously. One thing would suggest another--generally with no +connection in time. I have pieced the parts together myself. He did +indeed set out more than once or twice to give me his history, but +always we got discussing something, and so it was interrupted. + +I will not write what I have set in order as if he were himself +narrating: the most modest man in the world would that way be put at a +disadvantage. The constant recurrence of the capital _I_, is apt to +rouse in the mind of the reader, especially if he be himself +egotistic, more or less of irritation at the egotism of the +narrator--while in reality the freedom of a man's personal utterance +_may_ be owing to his lack of the egotistic. Partly for my +friend's sake, therefore, I shall tell the story as--what indeed it +is--a narrative of my own concerning him. + + + +Chapter II + +With his parents. + + +The lingering, long-drawn-out _table d'hôte_ dinner was just over in +one of the inns on the _cornice_ road. The gentlemen had gone into the +garden, and some of the ladies to the _salotto_, where open windows +admitted the odours of many a flower and blossoming tree, for it was +toward the end of spring in that region. One had sat down to a +tinkling piano, and was striking a few chords, more to her own +pleasure than that of the company. Two or three were looking out into +the garden, where the diaphanous veil of twilight had so speedily +thickened to the crape of night, its darkness filled with thousands of +small isolated splendours--fire-flies, those “golden boats” never seen +“on a sunny sea,” but haunting the eves of the young summer, pulsing, +pulsing through the dusky air with seeming aimlessness, like sweet +thoughts that have no faith to bind them in one. A tall, graceful +woman stood in one of the windows alone. She had never been in Italy +before, had never before seen fire-flies, and was absorbed in the +beauty of their motion as much as in that of their golden +flashes. Each roving star had a tide in its light that rose and ebbed +as it moved, so that it seemed to push itself on by its own radiance, +ever waxing and waning. In wide, complicated dance, they wove a huge, +warpless tapestry with the weft of an ever vanishing aureate +shine. The lady, an Englishwoman evidently, gave a little sigh and +looked round, regretting, apparently, that her husband was not by her +side to look on the loveliness that woke a faint-hued fairy-tale in +her heart. The same moment he entered the room and came to her. He was +a man above the middle height, and from the slenderness of his figure, +looked taller than he was. He had a vivacity of motion, a readiness to +turn on his heel, a free swing of the shoulders, and an erect carriage +of the head, which all marked him a man of action: one that speculated +on his calling would immediately have had his sense of fitness +satisfied when he heard that he was the commander of an English +gun-boat, which he was now on his way to Genoa to join. He was +young--within the twenties, though looking two or three and thirty, +his face was so browned by sun and wind. His features were regular and +attractive, his eyes so dark that the liveliness of their movement +seemed hardly in accord with the weight of their colour. His wife was +very fair, with large eyes of the deepest blue of eyes. She looked +delicate, and was very lovely. They had been married about five +years. A friend had brought them in his yacht as far as Nice, and they +were now going on by land. From Genoa the lady must find her way home +without her husband. + +The lights in the room having been extinguished that the few present +might better see the fire-flies, he put his arm round her waist. + +“I'm so glad you're come, Henry!” she said, favoured by the piano. “I +was uncomfortable at having the lovely sight all to myself!” + +“It is lovely, darling!” he rejoined; then, after a moment's pause, +added, “I hope you will be able to sleep without the sea to rock you!” + +“No fear of that!” she answered. “The stillness will be delightful. I +was thoroughly reconciled to the motion of the yacht,” she went on, +“but there is a satisfaction in feeling the solid earth under you, and +knowing it will keep steady all night.” + +“I am glad you like the change. I never sleep the first night on +shore.--I cannot tell what it is, but somehow I keep wishing Fyvie +could have taken us all the way.” + +“Never mind, love. I will keep awake with you.” + +“It's not that! How could I mind lying awake with you beside me! Oh +Grace, you don't know, you cannot know, what you are to me! I don't +feel in the least that you're my other half, as people say. You're not +like a part of myself at all; to think so would be sacrilege! You are +quite another, else how could you be mine! You make me forget myself +altogether. When I look at you, I stand before an enchanted mirror +that cannot show what is in front of it.” + +“No, Harry; I'm a true mirror, for I hold that inside me which remains +outside me.” + +“I fear you've got beyond me!” said her husband, laughing. “You always +do!” + +“Yes, at nonsense, Harry.” + +“Then your speech was nonsense, was it?” + +“No; it was full of sense. But think of something you would like me to +say; I must fetch the boy to see the fire-flies; when I come back I +will say it.” + +She left the room. Her husband stood where he was, gazing out, with a +tender look in his face that deepened to sadness--whether from the +haunting thought of his wife's delicate health and his having to leave +her, or from some strange foreboding, I cannot tell. When presently +she returned with their one child in her arms, he made haste to take +him from her. + +“My darling,” he said, “he is much too heavy for you! How stupid of me +not to think of it! If you don't promise me never to do that at home, +I will take him to sea with me!” + +The child, a fair, bright boy, the sleep in whose eyes had turned to +wonder, for they seemed to see everything, and be quite satisfied with +nothing, went readily to his father, but looked back at his +mother. The only sign he gave that he was delighted with the +fire-flies was, that he looked now to the one, now to the other of his +parents, speechless, with shining eyes. He knew they were feeling just +like himself. Silent communion was enough. + +The father turned to carry him back to bed. The mother turned to look +after them. As she did so, her eyes fell upon two or three delicate, +small-leaved plants--I do not know what they were--that stood in pots +on the balcony in front of the open window: they were shivering. The +night was perfectly still, but their leaves trembled as with an +ague-fit. + +“Look, Harry! What is that?” she cried, pointing to them. + +He turned and looked, said it must be some loaded wagon passing, and +went off with the child. + +“I hope to-morrow will be just like to-day!” said his wife when he +returned. “What shall we do with it?--our one real holiday, you know!” + +“I have a notion in my head,” he answered. “That little town Georgina +spoke of, is not far from here--among the hills: shall we go and see +it?” + + + +Chapter III. + +Without his parents. + + +The sun in England seems to shine because he cannot help it; the sun +in Italy seems to shine because he means it, and wants to mean +it. Thus he shone the next morning, including in his attentions a +curious little couple, husband and wife, who, attended by a guide, and +borne by animals which might be mules and might be donkeys, and were +not lovely to look on except through sympathy with their ugliness, +were slowly ascending a steep terraced and zigzagged road, with olive +trees above and below them. They were on the south side of the hill, +and the olives gave them none of the little shadow they have in their +power, for the trees next the sun were always below the road. The man +often wiped his red, innocent face, and looked not a little +distressed; but the lady, although as stout as he, did not seem to +suffer, perhaps because she was sheltered by a very large bonnet After +a silence of a good many minutes, she was the first to speak. + +“I can't say but I'm disappointed in the olives, Thomas,” she +remarked. “They ain't much to keep the sun off you!” + +“They wouldn't look bad along a brookside in Essex!” returned her +husband. “Here they do seem a bit out of place!” + +“Well, but, poor things! how are they to help it--with only a trayful +of earth under their feet! If you planted a priest on a terrace he +would soon be as thin as they!” + +They had just passed a very stout priest, in a low broad hat, and +cassock, and she laughed merrily at her small joke. They were an +English country parson and his wife, abroad for the first time in +their now middle-aged lives, and happy as children just out of +school. Incapable of disliking anybody, there was no unkindness in +Mrs. Porson's laughter. + +“I don't see,” she resumed, “how they ever can have a picnic in such a +country!” + +“Why not?” + +“There's no place to sit down!” + +“Here's a whole hill-side!” + +“But so hard!” she answered. “There's not an inch of turf or grass in +any direction!” + +The pair--equally plump, and equally good-natured--laughed together. + +I need not give more of their talk. It was better than most talk, yet +not worth recording. Their guide, perceiving that they knew no more of +Italian than he did of English, had withdrawn to the rear, and stumped +along behind them all the way, holding much converse with his donkeys +however, admonishing now this one, now that one, and seeming not a +little hurt with their behaviour, to judge from the expostulations +that accompanied his occasionally more potent arguments. Assuredly the +speed they made was small; but it was a festa, and hot. + +They were on the way to a small town some distance from the shore, on +the crest of the hill they were now ascending. It would, from the +number of its inhabitants, have been in England a village, but there +are no villages in the Riviera. However insignificant a place may be, +it is none the less a town, possibly a walled town. Somebody had told +Mr. and Mrs. Person they ought to visit Graffiacane, and to +Graffiacane they were therefore bound: why they ought to visit it, and +what was to be seen there, they took the readiest way to know. + +The place was indeed a curious one, high among the hills, and on the +top of its own hill, with approaches to it like the trenches of a +siege. All the old towns in that region seem to have climbed up to +look over the heads of other things. Graffiacane saw over hills and +valleys and many another town--each with its church standing highest, +the guardian of the flock of houses beneath it; saw over many a +water-course, mostly dry, with lovely oleanders growing in the middle +of it; saw over multitudinous oliveyards and vineyards; saw over mills +with great wheels, and little ribbons of water to drive them--running +sometimes along the tops of walls to get at their work; saw over +rugged pines, and ugly, verdureless, raw hillsides--away to the sea, +lying in the heat like a heavenly vat in which all the tails of all +the peacocks God was making, lay steeped in their proper dye. Numerous +were the sharp turns the donkeys made in their ascent; and at this +corner and that, the sweetest life-giving wind would leap out upon the +travellers, as if it had been lying there in wait to surprise them +with the heavenliest the old earth, young for all her years, could +give them. But they were getting too tired to enjoy anything, and were +both indeed not far from asleep on the backs of their humble beasts, +when a sudden, more determined yet more cheerful assault of their +guide upon his donkeys, roused both them and their riders; and looking +sleepily up, with his loud _heeoop_ ringing in their ears, and a sense +of the insidious approach of two headaches, they saw before them the +little town, its houses gathered close for protection, like a brood of +chickens, and the white steeple of the church rising above them, like +the neck of the love-valiant hen. + +Passing through the narrow arch of the low-browed gateway, hot as was +the hour, a sudden cold struck to their bones. For not a ray of light +shone into the narrow street. The houses were lofty as those of a +city, and parted so little by the width of the street that friends on +opposite sides might almost from their windows have shaken +hands. Narrow, rough, steep old stone-stairs ran up between and inside +the houses, all the doors of which were open to the air--here, +however, none of the sweetest. Everywhere was shadow; everywhere one +or another evil odour; everywhere a look of abject and dirty +poverty--to an English eye, that is. Everywhere were pretty children, +young, slatternly mothers, withered-up grandmothers, the gleam of +glowing reds and yellows, and the coolness of subdued greens and fine +blues. Such at least was the composite first impression made on Mr. +and Mrs. Porson. As it was a festa, more men than usual were looking +out of cavern-like doorways or over hand-wrought iron balconies, were +leaning their backs against door-posts, and smoking as if too lazy to +stop. Many of the women were at prayers in the church. All was +orderly, and quieter than usual for a festa. None could have told the +reason; the townsfolk were hardly aware that an undefinable oppression +was upon them--an oppression that lay also upon their visitors, and +the donkeys that had toiled with them up the hills and slow-climbing +valleys. + +It added to the gloom and consequent humidity of the town that the +sides of the streets were connected, at the height of two or perhaps +three stories, by thin arches--mere jets of stone from the one house +to the other, with but in rare instance the smallest superstructure to +keep down the key of the arch. Whatever the intention of them, they +might seem to serve it, for the time they had straddled there +undisturbed had sufficed for moss and even grass to grow upon those +which Mr. Porson now regarded with curious speculation. A bit of an +architect, and foiled, he summoned at last what Italian he could, +supplemented it with Latin and a terminational _o_ or _a_ tacked to +any French or English word that offered help, and succeeded, as he +believed, in gathering from a by-stander, that the arches were there +because of the earthquakes. + +He had not language enough of any sort to pursue the matter, else he +would have asked his informant how the arch they were looking at could +be of any service, seeing it had no weight on the top, and but a +slight endlong pressure must burst it up. Turning away to tell his +wife what he had learned, he was checked by a low rumbling, like +distant thunder, which he took for the firing of festa guns, having +discovered that Italians were fond of all kinds of noises. The next +instant they felt the ground under their feet move up and down and +from side to side with confused motion. A sudden great cry arose. One +moment and down every stair, out of every door, like animals from +their holes, came men, women, and children, with a rush. The +earthquake was upon them. + +But in such narrow streets, the danger could hardly be less than +inside the houses, some of which, the older especially, were ill +constructed--mostly with boulder-stones that had neither angles nor +edges, hence little grasp on each other beyond what the friction of +their weight, and the adhesion of their poor old friable cement, gave +them; for the Italians, with a genius for building, are careless of +certain constructive essentials. After about twenty seconds of +shaking, the lonely pair began to hear, through the noise of the cries +of the people, some such houses as these rumbling to the earth. + +They were far more bewildered than frightened. They were both of good +nerve, and did not know the degree of danger they were in, while the +strangeness of the thing contributed to an excitement that helped +their courage. I cannot say how they might have behaved in an hotel +full of their countrymen and countrywomen, running and shrieking, and +altogether comporting themselves as if they knew there was no God. The +fear on all sides might there have infected them; but the terror of +the inhabitants who knew better than they what the thing meant, did +not much shake them. For one moment many of the people stood in the +street motionless, pale, and staring; the next they all began to run, +some for the gateway, but the greater part up the street, staggering +as they ran. The movement of the ground was indeed small--not more, +perhaps, than half an inch in any direction--but fear and imagination +weakened all their limbs. They had not run far, however, before the +terrible unrest ceased as suddenly as it had begun. + +The English pair drew a long breath where they stood--for they had not +stirred a step, or indeed thought whither to run--and imagining it +over for a hundred years, looked around them. Their guide had +disappeared. The two donkeys stood perfectly still with their heads +hanging down. They seemed in deep dejection, and incapable of +movement. A few men only were yet to be seen. They were running up the +street. In a moment more it would be empty. They were the last of +those that had let the women go to church without them. They were +hurrying to join them in the sanctuary, the one safe place: the rest +of the town might be shaken in heaps on its foundations, but the +church would stand! Guessing their goal, the Porsons followed +them. But they were neither of a build nor in a condition to make +haste, and the road was uphill. No one place, however, was far from +another within the toy-town, and they came presently to an open +_piazza_, on the upper side of which rose the great church. It had a +square front, masking with its squareness the triangular gable of the +building. Upon this screen, in the brightest of colours, magenta and +sky-blue predominating, was represented the day of judgment--the +mother seated on the right hand of the judge, and casting a pitiful +look upon the miserable assembly on her left. The square was a good +deal on the slope, and as they went slowly up to the church, they kept +looking at the picture. The last tatters of the skirt of the crowd had +disappeared through the great door, and but for themselves the square +was empty. All at once the picture at which they were gazing, the +spread of wall on which it was painted, the whole bulk of the huge +building began to shudder, and went on shuddering--“just,” Mr. Porson +used to say when describing the thing to a friend, “like the skin of a +horse determined to get rid of a gad-fly.” The same moment the tiles +on the roof began to clatter like so many castanets in the hands of +giants, and the ground to wriggle and heave. But they were too much +absorbed in what was before their eyes to heed much what went on under +their feet. The oscillatory displacement of the front of the church +did not at most seem to cover more than a hand-breadth, but it was +enough. Down came the plaster surface, with the judge and his mother, +clashing on the pavement below, while the good and the bad yet stood +trembling. A few of the people came running out, thinking the open +square after all safer than the church, but there was no rush to the +open air. The shaking had lasted about twenty seconds, or at most half +a minute, when, without indication to the eyes watching the front, +there came a roaring crash and a huge rumbling, through and far above +which, rose a multitudinous shriek of terror, dismay, and agony, and a +number of men and women issued as if shot from a catapult. Then a few +came straggling out, and then--no more. The roof had fallen upon the +rest. + +With the first rush from the church, the shaking ceased utterly, and +the still earth seemed again the immovable thing the English +spectators had conceived her. Of what had taken place there was little +sign on the earth, no sign in the blue sun-glorious heaven; only in +the air there was a cloud of dust so thick as to look almost solid, +and from the cloud, as it seemed, came a ghastly cry, mingled of +shrieks and groans and articulate appeals for help. The cry kept on +issuing, while the calm front of the church, dominated by that +frightful canopy, went on displaying the assembled nations delivered +from their awful judge. While the multitude groaned within, it spread +itself out to the sun in silent composure, welcoming and cherishing +his rays in what was left of its gorgeous hues. + +The Porsons stood for a moment stunned, came to their senses, and made +haste to enter the building. With white faces and trembling hands, +they drew aside the heavy leather curtain that hung within the great +door, but could for a moment see nothing; the air inside seemed filled +with a solid yellow dust As their eyes recovered from the sudden +change of sunlight for gloom, however, they began to distinguish the +larger outlines, and perceived that the floor was one confused heap of +rafters and bricks and tiles and stones and lime. The centre of the +roof had been a great dome; now there was nothing between their eyes +and the clear heaven but the slowly vanishing cloud of ruin. In the +mound below they could at first distinguish nothing human--could not +have told, in the dim chaos, limbs from broken rafters. Eager to help, +they dared not set their feet upon the mass--not that they feared the +walls which another shock might bring upon their heads, but that they +shuddered lest their own added weight should crush some live human +creature they could not descry. Three or four who had received little +or no hurt, were moving about the edges of the heap, vaguely trying to +lift now this, now that, but yielding each attempt in despair, either +from its evident uselessness, or for lack of energy. They would give a +pull at a beam that lay across some writhing figure, find it +immovable, and turn with a groan to some farther cry. How or where +were they to help? Others began to come in with white faces and +terror-stricken eyes; and before long the sepulchral ruin had little +groups all over it, endeavouring in shiftless fashion to bring rescue +to the prisoned souls. + +The Porsons saw nothing they could do. Great beams and rafters which +it was beyond their power to move an inch, lay crossed in all +directions; and they could hold little communication with those who +were in a fashion at work. Alas, they were little better than vainly +busy, while the louder moans accompanying their attempts revealed that +they added to the tortures of those they sought to deliver! The two +saw more plainly now, and could distinguish contorted limbs, and here +and there a countenance. The silence, more and more seldom broken, was +growing itself terrible. Had they known how many were buried there, +they would have wondered so few were left able to cry out. At moments +there was absolute stillness in the dreadful place. The heart of +Mrs. Porson began to sink. + +“Do come out,” she whispered, afraid of her own voice. “I feel so sick +and faint, I fear I shall drop.” + +As she spoke something touched her leg. She gave a cry and started +aside. It was a hand, but of the body to which it belonged nothing +could be seen. It must have been its last movement; now it stuck there +motionless. Then they spied amid sad sights a sadder still. Upon the +heap, a little way from its edge, sat a child of about three, dressed +like a sailor, gazing down at something--they could not see +what. Going a little nearer, they saw it--the face of a fair woman, +evidently English, who lay dead, with a great beam across her +heart. The child showed no trace of tears; his white face seemed +frozen. The stillness upon it was not despair, but suggested a world +in which hope had never yet been born. Pity drove Mrs. Porson's +sickness away. + +“My dear!” she said; but the child took no heed. Her voice, however, +seemed to wake something in him. He started to his feet, and rushing +at the beam, began to tug at it with his tiny hands. Mrs. Porson burst +into tears. + +“It's no use, darling!” she cried. + +“Wake mamma!” he said, turning, and looking up at her. + +“She will not wake,” sobbed Mrs. Porson. + +Her husband stood by speechless, choking back the tears of which, +being an Englishman, he was ashamed. + +“She _will_ wake,” returned the boy. “She always wakes when I kiss +her.” + +He knelt beside her, to prove upon her white face the efficacy of the +measure he had never until now known to fail. That he had already +tried it was plain, for he had kissed away much of the dust, though +none of the death. When once more he found that she did not even close +her lips to return his passionate salute, he desisted. With that +saddest of things, a child's sigh, and a look that seemed to Mrs. +Porson to embody the riddle of humanity, he reseated himself on the +beam, with his little feet on his mother's bosom, where so often she +had made them warm. He did not weep; he did not fix his eyes on his +mother; his look was level and moveless and set upon nothing. He +seemed to have before him an utter blank--as if the outer wall of +creation had risen frowning in front, and he knew there was nothing +behind it but chaos. + +“Where is your papa?” asked Mr. Porson. + +The boy looked round bewildered. + +“Gone,” he answered; nor could they get anything more from him. + +“Was your papa with you here?” asked Mrs. Porson. + +He answered only with the word _Gone_, uttered in a dazed fashion. + +By this time all the men left in the town were doing their best, under +the direction of an intelligent man, the priest of a neighbouring +parish. They had already got one or two out alive, and their own +priest dead. They worked well, their terror of the lurking earthquake +forgotten in their eagerness to rescue. From their ignorance of the +language, however, Mr. Porson saw they could be of little use; and in +dread of doing more harm than good, he judged it better to go. + +They stood one moment and looked at each other in silence. The child +had dropped from the beam, and lay fast asleep across his mother's +bosom, with his head on a lump of mortar. Without a word spoken, +Mrs. Person, picking her way carefully to the spot, knelt down by the +dead mother, tenderly kissed her cheek, lifted the sleeping child, and +with all the awe, and nearly all the tremulous joy of first +motherhood, bore him to her husband. The throes of the earthquake had +slain the parents, and given the child into their arms. Without look +of consultation, mark of difference, or sign of agreement, they turned +in silence and left the terrible church, with the clear summer sky +looking in upon its dead. + +As they passed the door, the sun met them shining with all his +might. The sea, far away across the tops of hills and the clefts of +valleys, lay basking in his glory. The hot air quivered all over the +wide landscape. From the flight of steps in front of the church they +looked down on the streets of the town, and beyond them into space. It +looked the best of all possible worlds--as neither plague, famine, +pestilence, earthquakes, nor human wrongs, persuade me it is not, +judged by the high intent of its existence. When a man knows that +intent, as I dare to think I do, _then_ let him say, and not till +then, whether it be a good world or not. That in the midst of the +splendour of the sunny day, in the midst of olives and oranges, grapes +and figs, ripening swiftly by the fervour of the circumambient air, +should lie that charnel-church, is a terrible fact, neither to be +ignored, nor to be explained by the paltry theory of the greatest good +to the greatest number; but the end of the maker's dream is not this. + +When they turned into the street that led to the gate, they found the +donkeys standing where they had left them. Their owner was not with +them. He had gone into the church with the rest, and was killed. When +they caught sight of the patient, dejected animals, unheeded and +unheeding, then first they spoke, whispering in the awful stillness of +the world: they must take the creatures, and make the best of their +way back without a guide! They judged that, as the road was chiefly +down hill, and the donkeys would be going home, they would not have +much difficulty with them. At the worst, short and stout as they were, +they were not bad walkers, and felt more than equal to carrying the +child between them. Not a person was in the street when they mounted; +almost all were in the church, at its strange, terrible service. Mrs. +Porson mounted the strongest of the animals, her husband placed the +sleeping child in her arms, and they started, he on foot by the side +of his wife, and his donkey following. No one saw them pass through +the gate of the town. + +They were not sure of the way, for they had been partly asleep as they +came, but so long as they went downward, and did not leave the road, +they could hardly go wrong! The child slept all the way. + + + +Chapter IV. + +The new family. + + +How shall a man describe what passed in the mind of a childless wife, +with a motherless boy in her arms! It is the loveliest provision, +doubtless, that every child should have a mother of his own; but there +is a mother-love--which I had almost called more divine--the love, +namely, that a woman bears to a child because he is a child, +regardless of whether he be her own or another's. It is that they may +learn to love thus, that women have children. Some women love so +without having any. No conceivable treasure of the world could have +once entered into comparison with the burden of richness Mrs. Porson +bore. She told afterward, with voice hushed by fear of irreverence, +how, as they went down one of the hills, she slept for a moment, and +dreamed that she was Mary with the holy thing in her arms, fleeing to +Egypt on the ass, with Joseph, her husband, walking by her side. For +years and years they had been longing for a child--and here lay the +divinest little one, with every mark of the kingdom upon him! His +father and mother lying crushed under the fallen dome of that fearful +church, was it strange he should seem to belong to her? + +But there might be some one somewhere in the world with a better +claim; possibly--horrible thought!--with more need of him than she! Up +started a hideous cupidity, a fierce temptation to dishonesty, such as +she had never imagined. We do not know what is in us until the +temptation comes. Then there is the devil to fight. And Mrs. Porson +fought him. + +Mr. Porson was, in a milder degree, affected much as his wife. He +could not help wishing, nor was he wrong in wishing, that, since the +child's father and mother were gone, they might take their place, and +love their orphan. They were far from rich, but what was one child! +They might surely manage to give him a good education, and set him +doing for himself! But, alas, there might be others--others with +love-property in the child! The same thoughts were working in each, +but neither dared utter them in the presence of the sleeping treasure. + +As they descended the last slope above the town, with the wide +sea-horizon before them, they beheld such a glory of after-sunset as, +even on that coast, was unusual. A chord of colour that might have +been the prostrate fragment of a gigantic rainbow, lay along a large +arc of the horizon. The farther portion of the sea was an indigo blue, +save for a grayish line that parted it from the dusky red of the +sky. This red faded up through orange and dingy yellow to a pale green +and pale blue, above which came the depth of the blue night, in which +rayed resplendent the evening star. Below the star and nearer to the +west, lay, very thin and very long, the sickle of the new moon. If +death be what it looks to the unthinking soul, and if the heavens +declare the glory of God, as they do indeed to the heart that knows +him, then is there discord between heaven and earth such as no +argument can harmonize. But death is not what men think it, for +“Blessed are they that mourn for the dead.” + +The sight enhanced the wonder and hope of the two honest good souls in +the treasure they carried. Out of the bosom of the skeleton Death +himself, had been given them--into their very arms--a germ of life, a +jewel of heaven! At the thought of what lay up the hill behind them, +they felt their joy in the child almost wicked; but if God had taken +the child's father and mother, might they not be glad in the hope that +he had chosen them to replace them? That he had for the moment at +least, they were bound to believe! + +They travelled slowly on, through the dying sunset, and an hour or two +of the star-bright night that followed, adorned rather than lighted by +the quaint boat of the crescent moon. Weary, but lapt in a voiceless +triumph, they came at last, guided by the donkeys, to their hotel. + +All were talking of the earthquake. A great part of the English had +fled in a panic terror, like sheep that had no shepherd--hunted by +their own fears, and betrayed by their imagined faith. The steadiest +church-goer fled like the infidel he reviled. The fool said in his +heart, “There is no God,” and fled. The Christian said with his mouth, +“Verily there is a God that ruleth in the earth!” and fled--far as he +could from the place which, as he fancied, had shown signs of a +special presence of the father of Jesus Christ. + +After the Persons were in the house, there came two or three small +shocks. Every time, out with a cry rushed the inhabitants into the +streets; every time, out into the garden of the hotel swarmed such as +were left in it of Germans and English. But our little couple, who had +that day seen so much more of its terrors than any one else in the +place, and whose chamber was at the top of the house where the swaying +was worst, were too much absorbed in watching and tending their lovely +boy to heed the earthquake. Perhaps their hearts whispered, “Can that +which has given us such a gift be unfriendly?” + +“If his father and mother,” said Mrs. Person, as they stood regarding +him, “are permitted to see their child, they shall see how we love +him, and be willing he should love us!” + +As they went up the stairs with him, the boy woke When he looked and +saw a face that was not his mother's, a cloud swept across the heaven +of his eyes. He closed them again, and did not speak. The first of the +shocks came as they were putting him to bed: he turned very white and +looked up fixedly, as if waiting another fall from above, but sat +motionless on his new mother's lap. The instant the vibration and +rocking ceased, he drank from the cup of milk she offered him, as +quietly as if but a distant thunder had rolled away. When she put him +in the bed, he looked at her with such an indescribable expression of +bewildered loss, that she burst into tears. The child did not cry. He +had not cried since they took him. The woman's heart was like to break +for him, but she managed to say, + +“God has taken her, my darling. He is keeping her for you, and I am +going to keep you for her;” and with that she kissed him. + +The same moment came the second shock. + +Need wakes prophecy: the need of the child made of the parson a +prophet. + +“It is God that does the shaking,” he said. “It's all right. Nobody +will be the worse--not much, at least!” + +“Not at all,” rejoined the boy, and turned his face away. + +From the lips of such a tiny child, the words seemed almost awful. + +He fell fast asleep, and never woke till the morning. Mrs. Porson lay +beside him, yielding him, stout as she was, a good half of the little +Italian bed. She scarcely slept for excitement and fear of smothering +him. + +The Persons were honest people, and for all their desire to possess +the child, made no secret of how and where they had found him, or of +as much of his name as he could tell them, which was only _Clare_. But +they never heard of inquiry after him. On the gunboat at Genoa they +knew nothing of their commander's purposes, or where to seek him. Days +passed before they began to be uneasy about him, and when they did +make what search for him they could, it was fruitless. + + + +Chapter V. + +His new home. + + +The place to which the good people carried the gift of the +earthquake--carried him with much anxiety and more exultation--had no +very distinctive features. It had many fields in grass, many in crop, +and some lying fallow--all softly undulating. It had some trees, and +everywhere hedges dividing fields whose strange shapes witnessed to a +complicated history, of which few could tell anything. Here and there +in the hollows between the motionless earth-billows, flowed, but did +not seem to flow, what they called a brook. But the brooks there were +like deep soundless pools without beginning or end. There was no life, +no gaiety, no song in them, only a sullen consent to exist. That at +least is how they impress one accustomed to real brooks, lark-like, +always on the quiver, always on the move, always babbling and gabbling +and gamboling, always at their games, always tossing their pebbles +about, and telling them to talk. A man that loved them might say there +was more in the silence of these, than in the speech of those; but +what silence can be better than a song of delight that we are, that we +were, that we are to be! The stillness may be full of solemn fish, +mysterious as itself, and deaf with secrets; but blessed is the brook +that lets the light of its joy shine. + +Dull as the place must seem in this my description, it was the very +country for the boy. He would come into more contact with its modest +beauty in a day than some of us would in a year. Nobody quite knows +the beauty of a country, especially of a quiet country, except one who +has been born in it, or for whom at least childhood and boyhood and +youth have opened door after door into the hidden phases of its +life. There is no square yard on the face of the earth but some one +can in part understand what God meant in making it; while the same +changeful skies canopy the most picturesque and the dullest +landscapes; the same winds wake and blow over desert and pasture land, +making the bosoms of youth and age swell with the delight of their +blowing. The winds are not all so full as are some of delicious odours +gathered as they pass from gardens, fields, and hill-sides; but all +have their burden of sweetness. Those that blew upon little Clare were +oftener filled with the smell of farmyards, and burning weeds, and +cottage-fires, than of flowers; but never would one of such odours +revisit him without bringing fresh delight to his heart. Its mere +memorial suggestion far out on the great sea would wake the old child +in the man. The pollards along the brooks grew lovely to his heart, +and were not the less lovely when he came to understand that they were +not so lovely as God had meant them to be. He was one of those who, +regarding what a thing _is_, and not comparing it with other things, +descry the thought of God in it, and love it; for to love what is +beautiful is as natural as to love our mothers. + +The parsonage to which his new father and mother brought him was like +the landscape--humble. It was humble even for a parsonage--which has +no occasion to be fine. For men and women whose business it is to +teach their fellows to be true and fair, and not covet fine things, +are but hypocrites, or at best intruders and humbugs, if they want +fine things themselves. Jesus Christ did not care about fine +things. He loved every lovely thing that ever his father made. If any +one does not know the difference between fine things and lovely +things, he does not know much, if he has all the science in the world +at his finger-ends. + +One good thing about the parsonage was, that it was aid, and the +swallows had loved it for centuries. That way Clare learned to love +the swallows--and they are worth loving. Then it had a very old +garden, nearly as old-fashioned as it was old, and many flowers that +have almost ceased to be seen grew in it, and did not enjoy their +lives the less that they were out of fashion. All the furniture in the +house was old, and mostly shabby; it was possible, therefore, to love +it a little. Who on earth could be such a fool as to love a new piece +of furniture! One might prize it; one might admire it; one might like +it because it was pretty, or because it was comfortable; but only a +silly woman whose soul went to bed on her new sideboard, could say she +loved it. And then it would not be true. It is impossible that any but +an _old_ piece of furniture should be loved. + +His father and mother had a charming little room made for him in the +garret, right up among the swallows, who soon admitted him a member of +their society--an honorary member, that is, who was not expected to +fly with them to Africa except he liked. His new parents did this +because they saw that, when he could not be with them, he preferred +being by himself; and that moods came upon him in which he would steal +away even from them, seized with a longing for loneliness. In general, +next to being with his mother anywhere, he liked to be with his father +in the study. If both went out, and could not take him with them, he +would either go to his own room, or sit in the study alone. It was a +very untidy room, crowded with books, mostly old and dingy, and in +torn bindings. Many of them their owner never opened, and they +suffered in consequence; a few of them were constantly in his hands, +and suffered in consequence. All smelt strong of stale tobacco, but +that hardly accounts for the fact that Clare never took to smoking. +Another thing perhaps does--that he was always too much of a man to +want to look like a man by imitating men. That is unmanly. A boy who +wants to look like a man is not a manly boy, and men do not care for +his company. A true boy is always welcome to a true man, but a +would-be man is better on the other side of the wall. + +His mother oftenest sat in a tiny little drawing-room, which smelt of +withered rose-leaves. I think it must smell of them still. I believe +it smelt of them a hundred years before she saw the place. Clare loved +the smell of the rose-leaves and disliked the smell of the tobacco; +yet he preferred the study with its dingy books to the pretty +drawing-room without his mother. + +There was a village, a very small one, in the parish, and a good many +farm-houses. + +Such was the place in which Clare spent the next few years of his +life, and there his new parents loved him heartily. The only thing +about him that troubled them, besides the possibility of losing him, +was, that they could not draw out the tiniest smile upon his sweet, +moonlight-face. + + + +Chapter VI. + +What did draw out his first smile. + + +Mr. Porson was a man about five and forty; his wife was a few years +younger. His theories of religion were neither large nor lofty; he +accepted those that were handed down to him, and did not trouble +himself as to whether they were correct. He did what was better: he +tried constantly to obey the law of God, whether he found it in the +Bible or in his own heart. Thus he was greater in the kingdom of +heaven than thousands that knew more, had better theories about God, +and could talk much more fluently concerning religion than he. By +obeying God he let God teach him. So his heart was always growing; and +where the heart grows, there is no fear of the intellect; there it +also grows, and in the best fashion of growth. He was very good to his +people, and not foolishly kind. He tried his best to help them to be +what they ought to be, to make them bear their troubles, be true to +one another, and govern themselves. He was like a father to them. For +some, of course, he could do but little, because they were locked +boxes with nothing in them; but for a few he did much. Perhaps it was +because he was so good to his flock that God gave him little Clare to +bring up. Perhaps it was because he and his wife were so good to +Clare, that by and by a wonderful thing took place. + +About three years after the earthquake, Mrs. Porson had a baby-girl +sent her for her very own. The father and mother thought themselves +the happiest couple on the face of the earth--and who knows but they +were! If they were not, so much the better! for then, happy as they +were, there were happier yet than they; and who, in his greatest +happiness, would not be happier still to know that the earth held +happier than he! + +When Clare first saw the baby, he looked down on her with solemn, +unmoved countenance, and gazed changeless for a whole minute. He +thought there had been another earthquake, that another church-dome +had fallen, and another child been found and brought home from the +ruin. Then light began to grow somewhere under his face. His mother, +full as was her heart of her new child, watched his countenance +anxiously. The light under his face grew and grew, till his face was +radiant. Then out of the midst of the shining broke the heavenliest +smile she had ever seen on human countenance--a smile that was a +clearer revelation of God than ten thousand books about him. For what +must not that God be, who had made the boy that smiled such a smile +and never knew it! After this he smiled occasionally, though it was +but seldom. He never laughed--that is, not until years after this +time; but, on the other hand, he never looked sullen. A quiet peace, +like the stillness of a long summer twilight in the north, dwelt upon +his visage, and appeared to model his every motion. Part of his life +seemed away, and he waiting for it to come back. Then he would be +merry! + +He was never in a hurry, yet always doing something--always, that is, +when he was not in his own room. There his mother would sometimes find +him sitting absolutely still, with his hands on his knees. Nor was she +sorry to surprise him thus, for then she was sure of one of his rare +smiles. She thought he must then be dreaming of his own mother, and a +pang would go through her at the thought that he would one day love +her more than herself. “He will laugh then!” she said. She did not +think how the gratitude of that mother would one day overwhelm her +with gladness. + +He never sought to be caressed, but always snuggled to one that drew +him close. Never once did he push any one away. He learned what +lessons were set him--not very fast, but with persistent endeavour to +understand. He was greatly given to reading, but not particularly +quick. He thus escaped much, fancying that he knew when he did not +know--a quicksand into which fall so many clever boys and girls. Give +me a slow, steady boy, who knows when he does not know a thing! To +know that you do not know, is to be a small prophet. Such a boy has a +glimmer of the something he does not know, or at least of the place +where it is; while the boy who easily grasps the words that stand for +a thing, is apt to think he knows the thing itself when he sees but +the wrapper of it--thinks he knows the church when he has caught sight +of the weather-cock. Mrs. Porson could see the understanding of a +thing gradually burst into blossom on the boy's face. It did not +smile, it only shone. Understanding is light; it needs love to change +light into a smile. + +There was something in the boy that his parents hardly hoped to +understand; something in his face that made them long to know what was +going on in him, but made them doubt if ever in this life they +should. He was not concealing anything from them. He did not know that +he had anything to tell, or that they wanted to know anything. He +never doubted that everybody saw him just as he felt himself; his soul +seemed bare to all the world. But he knew little of what was passing +in him: child or man never knows more than a small part of that. + +When first he was allowed to take the little one in his arms, he +sitting on a stool at his mother's feet, it was almost a new start in +his existence. A new confidence was born in his spirit. Mrs. Person +could read, as if reflected in his countenance, the pride and +tenderness that composed so much of her own conscious motherhood. A +certain staidness, almost sternness, took possession of his face as he +bent over the helpless creature, half on his knees, half in his +arms--the sternness of a protecting divinity that knew danger not +afar. He had taken a step upward in being; he was aware in himself, +without knowing it, of the dignity of fatherhood. Even now he knew +what so many seem never to learn, that a man is the defender of the +weak; that, if a man is his brother's keeper, still more is he his +sister's. She belonged to him, therefore he was hers in the slavery of +love, which alone is freedom. So reverential and so careful did he +show himself, that soon his mother trusted him, to the extent of his +power, more than any nurse. + +By and by she made the delightful discovery that, when he was alone +with the baby, the silent boy could talk. Where was no need or hope of +being understood, his words began to flow--with a rhythmical cadence +that seemed ever on the verge of verse. When first his mother heard +the sweet murmur of his voice, she listened; and then first she +learned what a hold the terrible thing that had given him into her +arms had upon him. For she heard him half singing, half saying-- + +“Baby, baby, do not grow. Keep small, and lie on my lap, and dream of +walking, but never walk; for when you walk you will run, and when you +run you will go away with father and mother--away to a big place where +the ground goes up to the sky; and you will go up the ground that goes +up to the sky, and you will come to a big church, and you will go into +the church; and the ground and the church and the sky will go _hurr, +hurr, hurr_; and the sky, full of angels, will come down with a great +roar; and all the yards and sails will drop out of the sky, and tumble +down father and mother, and hold them down that they cannot get up +again; and then you will have nobody but me. I will do all I can, but +I am only brother Clare, and you will want, want, want mother and +father, mother and father, and they will be always coming, and never +be come, not for ever so long! Don't grow a big girl, Maly!” + +The mother could not think what to say. She went in, and, in the hope +of turning his thoughts aside, took the baby, and made haste to +consult her husband. + +“We must leave it,” said Mr. Person. “Experience will soon correct +what mistake is in his notion. It is not so very far wrong. You and I +must go from them one day: what is it but that the sky will fall down +on us, and our bodies will get up no more! He thinks the time nearer +at hand than for their sakes I hope it is; but nobody can tell.” + +Clare never associated the church where the awful thing took place, +with the church to which he went on Sundays. The time for it, he +imagined, came to everybody. To Clare, nothing ever _happened_. The +way out of the world was a church in a city set on a hill, and there +an earthquake was always ready. + +The heart of his adoptive mother grew yet more tender toward him after +the coming of her own child. She was not quite sure that she did not +love him even more than Mary. She could not help the feeling that he +was a child of heaven sent out to nurse on the earth; and that it was +in reward for her care of him that her own darling was sent her. That +their love to the boy had something to do with the coming of the girl, +I believe myself, though what that something was, I do not precisely +understand. + +She left him less often alone with the child. She would not have his +thoughts drawn to the church of the earthquake; neither would she have +the mournfulness of his sweet voice much in the ears of her baby. He +never sang in a minor key when any one was by, but always and solely +when the baby and he were alone together. + + + +Chapter VII. + +Clare and his brothers. + + +After a year or two, Mr. Person became anxious lest the boy should +grow up too unlike other boys--lest he should not be manly, but of a +too gently sad behaviour. He began, therefore, to take him with him +about the parish, and was delighted to find him show extraordinary +endurance. He would walk many miles, and come home less fatigued than +his companion. To be sure, he had not much weight to carry; but it +seemed to Mr. Porson that his utter freedom from thought about himself +had a large share in his immunity from weariness. He continued slight +and thin--which was natural, for he was growing fast; but the muscles +of his little bird-like legs seemed of steel. The spindle-shanks went +striding, striding without a check, along the roughest roads, the pale +face shining atop of them like a sweet calm moon. To Mr. Person's +eyes, the moon, stooping, as she sometimes seems to do, downward from +the sky, always looked like him. The child woke something new in the +heart and mind of every one that loved him, but was himself +unconscious of his influence. His company was no check to his father +when meditating, after his habit as he walked, what he should say to +his people the next Sunday. For the good man never wrote or read a +sermon, but talked to his people as one who would meet what was in +them with what was in him. Hence they always believed “the parson +meant it.” He never said anything clever, and never said anything +unwise; never amused them, and never made them feel scornful, either +of him or of any one else. + +Instead of finding the presence of Clare distract his thoughts, he had +at times a curious sense that the boy was teaching him--that his +sermon was running before, or walking sedately on this side of him or +that. For Clare could run like the wind; and did run after +butterflies, dragon-flies, or anything that offered a chance of seeing +it nearer; but he never killed, and seldom tried to catch anything, if +but for a moment's examination. The swiftest run would scarcely +heighten the colour of his pale cheeks. + +He soon came to be known in the farm-houses of the parish. The +farmer-families were a little shy of him at first, fancying him too +fine a little gentleman for them; but as they got to know him, they +grew fond of him. They called him “the parson's man,” which pleased +Clare. But one old woman called him “the parson's cherubim.” + +One day Mr. Porson was calling at the house of the largest farm in the +parish, the nearest house to the parsonage. The farmer's wife was ill, +and having to go to her room to see her, he said to the boy-- + +“Clare, you run into the yard. Give my compliments to any one you +meet, and ask him to let you stay with him.” + +When the time came for their departure, Mr. Porson went to find +him. He did not call him; he wanted to see what he was about. Unable +to discover him, and coming upon no one of whom he might inquire, for +it was hay-time and everybody in the fields, he was at last driven to +use his voice. + +He had not to call twice. Out of the covered part of the pigsty, not +far from which the parson stood, the boy came creeping on all fours, +followed by a litter of half-grown, grunting, gamboling pigs. + +“Here I am, papa!” he cried. + +“Clare,” exclaimed his father, “what a mess you have made of +yourself!” + +“I gave them your compliments,” answered the boy, as he scrambled over +the fence with his father's assistance, “and asked them if I might +stay with them till you were ready. They said yes, and invited me +in. I went in; and we've been having such games! They were very kind +to me.” + +His father turned involuntarily and looked into the sty. There stood +all the pigs in a row, gazing after the boy, and looking as sorry as +their thick skins and bony snouts would let them. Their mother rose in +a ridge behind them, gazing too. Mr. Skymer always spoke of pigs as +about the most intelligent animals in the world. + +I do not know when or where or how his love of the animals began, for +he could not tell me. If it began with the pigs, it was far from +ending with them. + +The next day he asked his father if he might go and call upon the +pigs. + +“Have you forgotten, Clare,” said his mother, “what a job Susan and I +had with your clothes? I wonder still how you could have done such a +thing! They were quite filthy. When I saw you, I had half a mind to +put you in a bath, clothes and all. I doubt if they are sweet yet!” + +“Oh, yes, they are, indeed, mamma!” returned Clare; “and you know I +shall be careful after this! I shall not go into their house, but get +the farmer to let them out. I've thought of a new game with them!” + +His mother consented; the farmer did let the pigs out; and Clare and +they had a right good game together among the ricks in the yard. + +His growing nature showed itself in a swiftly widening friendship for +live things. The spreading ripples of his affection took in the cows +and the horses, the hens and the geese, and every creature about the +place, till at length it had to pull up at the moles, because he could +not get at them. I doubt if he would have liked them if he had seen +one eat a frog! He called the pigs little brothers, and the horses and +cows big brothers, and was perfectly at home with them before people +knew he cared for their company. I think his absolute simplicity +brought him near to the fountain of life, or rather, prevented him +from straying from it; and this kept him so alive himself, that he was +delicately sensitive to all life. He felt himself pledged to all other +life as being one with it. Its forms were therefore so open to him as +to seem familiar from the first. He knew instinctively what went on in +regions of life differing from his own--knew, without knowing how, +what the animals were thinking and feeling; so was able to interpret +their motions, even the sudden changes in their behaviour. + +There was one dangerous animal on the place--a bull, of which the +farmer had often said he must part with him, or he would be the death +of somebody. One morning he was struck with terror to find Clare in +the stall with Nimrod. The brute was chained up pretty short, but was +free enough for terrible mischief: Clare was stroking his nose, and +the beast was standing as still as a bull of bronze, with one curved +and one sharp, forward-set, wicked-looking horn in alarming proximity +to the angelic face. The farmer stood in dismay, still as the bull, +afraid to move. Clare looked up and smiled, but his delicate little +hand went on caressing the huge head. It was one of God's small high +creatures visiting with good news of hope one of his big low +creatures--a little brother of Jesus Christ bringing a taste of his +father's kingdom to his great dull bull of a brother. The farmer +called him. The boy came at once. Mr. Goodenough told him he must not +go near the bull; he was fierce and dangerous. Clare informed him that +he and the bull had been friends for a long time; and to prove it ran +back, and before the farmer could lay hold of him, was perched on the +animal's shoulders. The bull went on eating the grass in the manger +before him, and took as little heed of the boy as if it were but a fly +that had lighted on him, and neither tickled nor stung him. + +By degrees he grew familiar with all the goings on at the farm, and +drew nearer to a true relation with the earth that nourishes +all. Where the soil was not too heavy, the ploughman would set him on +the back of the near horse, and there he would ride in triumph to the +music of the ploughman's whistle behind. His was not the pomp of the +destroyer who rides trampling, but the pomp of the saviour drawing +forth life from the earth. In the summer the hayfield knew him, and in +the autumn the harvest-field, where busily he gathered what the earth +gave, and for himself strength, a sense of wide life and large +relations. The very mould, not to say the grass-blades and the +daisies, was dear to him. He was more sympathetic with the daisies +ploughed down than was even Burns, for he had a strong feeling that +they went somewhere, and were the better for going; that this was the +way their sky fell upon them. + +All the people on the farm, all the people of the village, every one +in the parish knew the boy and his story. From his gentleness and +lovingkindness to live things, there were who said he was half-witted; +others said he saw ghosts. The boys of the village despised, and some +hated him, because he was so unlike them. They called him a girl +because where they tormented he caressed. At this he would smile, and +they durst not lay hands on him. + +The days are long in boyhood, and Clare could do a many things in +one. There was the morning, the forenoon, and the long afternoon and +evening! He could help on the farm; he could play with ever so many +animals; he could learn his lessons, which happily were not heavy; he +could read any book he pleased in his father's library, where +_Paradise Lost_ was his favourite; he could nurse little Maly. He had +the more time for all these that he had no companion of his own age, +no one he wanted to go about with after school-hours. His father was +still his chief human companion, and neither of them grew tired of the +other. + +The most remarkable thing in the child was the calm and gentle +greatness of his heart. You often find children very fond of one or +two people, who, perhaps, in evil return, want to keep them all to +themselves, and reproach them for loving others. Many persons count it +a sign of depth in a child that he loves only one or two. I doubt it +greatly. I think that only the child who loves all life can love right +well, can love deeply and strongly and tenderly the lives that come +nearest him. Low nurses and small-hearted mothers dwarf and pervert +their children, doing their worst to keep them from having big hearts +like God. Clare had other teaching than this. He had lost his father +and mother, but many were given him to love; and so he was helped to +wait patiently till he found them again. God was keeping them for him +somewhere, and keeping him for them here. + +The good for which we are born into this world is, that we may learn +to love. I think Clare the most enviable of boys, because he loved +more than any one of his age I have heard of. There are people--oh, +such silly people they are!--though they may sometimes be +pleasing--who are always wanting people to love them. They think so +much of themselves, that they want to think more; and to know that +people love them makes them able to think more of themselves. They +even think themselves loving because they are fond of being loved! +You might as soon say because a man loves money he is generous; +because he loves to gather, therefore he knows how to scatter; because +he likes to read a story, therefore he can write one. Such lovers are +only selfish in a deeper way, and are more to blame than other selfish +people; for, loving to be loved, they ought the better to know what an +evil thing it is not to love; what a mean thing to accept what they +are not willing to give. Even to love only those that love us, is, as +the Lord has taught us, but a pinched and sneaking way of +loving. Clare never thought about being loved. He was too busy loving, +with so many about him to love, to think of himself. He was not the +contemptible little wretch to say, “What a fine boy I am, to make +everybody love me!” If he had been capable of that, not many would +have loved him; and those that did would most of them have got tired +of loving a thing that did not love again. Only great lovers like God +are able to do that, and they help God to make love grow. But there is +little truth in love where there is no wisdom in it. Clare's father +and mother were wise, and did what they could to make Clare wise. + +Also the animals, though they were not aware of it, did much to save +him from being spoiled by the humans whom the boy loved more than +them. For Clare's charity began at home. Those who love their own +people will love other people. Those who do not love children will +never love animals right. + +Here I will set down a strange thing that befell Clare, and caused him +a sore heart, making him feel like a traitor to the whole animal race, +and influencing his life for ever. I was at first puzzled to account +for the thing without attributing more imagination to the animals--or +some of them--than I had been prepared to do; but probably the main +factor in it was heart-disease. + +He had seen men go out shooting, but had never accompanied any +killers. I do not quite understand how, as in my story, he came even +to imitate using a gun. There was nothing in him that belonged to +killing; and that is more than I could say for myself, or any other +man I know except Clare Skymer. + +He was at the bottom of the garden one afternoon, where nothing but a +low hedge came between him and a field of long grass. He had in his +hand the stick of a worn-out umbrella. Suddenly a half-grown rabbit +rose in the grass before him, and bolted. From sheer unconscious +imitation, I believe, he raised the stick to his shoulder, and said +_Bang_. The rabbit gave a great bound into the air, fell, and lay +motionless. With far other feelings than those of a sportsman, Clare +ran, got through the hedge, and approached the rabbit trembling. He +could think nothing but that the creature was playing him a trick. Yet +he was frightened. Only how could he have hurt him! + +“I dare say the little one knows me,” he said to himself, “and wanted +to give me a start! He couldn't tell what a start it would be, or he +wouldn't have done it.” + +When he drew near, however, “the little one” did not, as he had hoped +and expected, jump up and run again. With sinking heart Clare went +close up, and looked down on it. It lay stretched out, motionless. +With death in his own bosom he stooped and tenderly lifted it. The +rabbit was stone-dead! The poor boy gazed at it, pressed it tenderly +to his heart, and went with it to find his mother. The tears kept +pouring down his face, but he uttered no cry till he came to her. Then +a low groaning howl burst from him; he laid the dead thing in her lap, +and threw himself on the floor at her feet in an abandonment of +self-accusation and despair. + +It was long before he was able to give her an intelligible account of +what had taken place. She asked him if he had found it dead. In answer +he could only shake his head, but that head-shake had a whole tragedy +in it. Then she examined “the little one,” but could find no mark of +any wound upon it. When at length she learned how the case was, she +tried to comfort him, insisting he was not to blame, for he did not +mean to kill the little one. He would not hearken to her loving +sophistry. + +“No, mother!” he said through his sobs; “I wouldn't have blamed +myself, though I should have been very sorry, if I had killed him by +accident--if I had stepped upon him, or anything of that kind; but I +meant to frighten him! I looked bad at him! I made him think I was an +enemy, and going to kill him! I shammed bad--and so was real bad.” + +He stopped with a most wailful howl. + +“Perhaps he knew me,” he resumed, “and couldn't understand it. It was +much worse than if I had shot him. He wouldn't have known then till he +was dead. But to die of terror was horrible. Oh, why didn't I think +what I was doing?” + +“Nobody could have thought of such a thing happening.” + +“No; but I ought to have thought, mother, of what I was doing. I was +trying to frighten him! I must have been in a cruel mood. Why didn't I +think love to the little one when I saw him, instead of thinking death +to him? I shall never look a rabbit in the face again! My heart must +have grown black, mother!” + +“I don't believe there is another rabbit in England would die from +such a cause,” persisted his mother thoughtfully. + +“Then what a superior rabbit he must have been!” said Clare. “To think +that I pulled down the roof of his church upon him!” + +He burst into a torrent of tears, and ran to his own room. There his +mother thought it better to leave him undisturbed. She wisely judged +that a mind of such sensibility was alone capable of finding the +comfort to fit its need. + +Such comfort he doubtless did find, for by the time his mother called +him to tea, calmness had taken the place of the agony on his +countenance. His mother asked him no questions, for she as well as her +husband feared any possible encouragement to self-consciousness. I +imagine the boy had reflected that things could not go so wrong that +nobody could set them right. I imagine he thought that, if he had done +the rabbit a wrong, as he never for a moment to the end of his life +doubted he had, he who is at the head of all heads and the heart of +all hearts, would contrive to let him tell the rabbit he was sorry, +and would give him something to do for the rabbit that would make up +for his cruelty to him. He did once say to his mother, and neither of +them again alluded to the matter, that he was sure the rabbit had +forgiven him. + +“Little ones are _so_ forgiving, you know, mother!” he added. + +Is it any wonder that my friend Clare Skymer should have been no +sportsman? + + + +Chapter VIII. + +Clare and his human brothers + + +Another anecdote of him, that has no furtherance of the story in it, I +must yet tell. + +One cold day in a stormy March, the wind was wildly blowing broken +clouds across the heavens, and now rain, now sleet, over the shivering +blades of the young corn, whose tender green was just tinging the dark +brown earth. The fields were now dark and wintry, heartless and cold; +now shining all over as with repentant tears; one moment refusing to +be comforted, and the next reviving with hope and a sense of new +life. Clare was hovering about the plough. Suddenly he spied, from a +mound in the field, a little procession passing along the +highway. Those in front carried something on their shoulders which +must be heavy, for it took six of them to carry it. He knew it was a +coffin, for his home was by the churchyard, and a funeral was no +unfamiliar sight. Behind it one man walked alone. For a moment Clare +watched him, and saw his bowed head and heavy pace. His heart filled +from its own perennial fount of pity, which was God himself in him. He +ran down the hill and across the next field, making for a spot some +distance ahead of the procession. As it passed him, he joined the +chief mourner, who went plodding on with his arms hanging by his +sides. Creeping close up to him, he slid his little soft hand into the +great horny hand of the peasant. Instinctively the big hand closed +upon the small one, and the weather-beaten face of a man of fifty +looked down on the boy. Not a word was said between them. They walked +on, hand in hand. + +Neither had ever seen the other. The man was following his wife and +his one child to the grave. “Nothing almost sees miracles but misery,” + says Kent in _King Lear_. Because this man was miserable, he saw a +miracle where was no miracle, only something very good. The thing was +true and precious, yea, a message from heaven. Those deep, upturned, +silent eyes; the profound, divine sympathy that shone in them; the +grasp of the tiny hand upon his large fingers, made the heart of the +man, who happened to be a catholic, imagine, and for a few moments +believe, that he held the hand of the infant Saviour. The cloud lifted +from his heart and brain, and did not return when he came to +understand that this was not _the_ lamb of God, only another lamb from +the same fold. + +When they had walked about two miles, the boy began to fear he might +be intruding, and would have taken his hand from the other, but the +man held it tight, and stooping whispered it was not far now. The +child, who, without knowing it, had taken the man under the +protection of his love, yielded at once, went with him to the grave, +joined in the service, and saw the grave filled. They went again as +they had come. Not a word was spoken. The man wept a little now and +then, drew the back of his brown hand across his eyes, and pressed a +little closer the hand he held. At the gate of the parsonage the boy +took his leave. He said they would be wondering what had become of +him, or he would have gone farther. The man released him without a +word. + +His mother had been uneasy about him, but when he told her how it was, +she said he had done right. + +“Yes,” returned the boy; “I belong there myself.” + +The mother knew he was not thinking of the grave. + +One more anecdote I will give, serving to introduce the narrative of +the following chapter, and helping to show the character of the +boy. He was so unlike most boys, that one must know all he may about +him, if he would understand him. + +Never yet, strange as the assertion must seem, had the boy shown any +anger. His father was a little troubled at the fact, fearing such +absence of resentment might indicate moral indifference, or, if not, +might yet render him incapable of coping with the world. He had +himself been brought up at a public school, and had not, with all his +experience of life, come to see, any more than most of the readers of +this story now see, or for a long time will see, that there lies no +nobility, no dignity in evil retort of any kind; that evil is evil +when returned as much as when given; that the only shining thing is +good--and the most shining, good for evil. + +One day a coarse boy in the village gave him a sharp blow on the +face. It forced water from his eyes and blood from his nose. He was +wiping away both at once with his handkerchief, when a kindly girl +stopped and said to him-- + +“Never mind; don't cry.” + +“Oh, no!” answered Clare; “it's only water, it's not crying. It would +be cowardly to cry.” + +“That's a brave boy! You'll give it him back one of these days.” + +“No,” he returned, “I shall not I couldn't.” + +“Why?” + +“Because it hurts so. My nose feels as if it were broken. I know it's +not broken, but it feels like it.” + +The girl, as well as the boys who stood around him, burst into +laughter. They saw no logic in his reasoning. Clare's was the divine +reasoning that comes of loving your neighbour; theirs was the earthly +reasoning that came of loving themselves. They did not see that to +Clare another boy was another of himself; that he was carrying out the +design of the Father of men, that his creatures should come together +into one, not push each other away. + +The next time he met the boy who struck him, so far was he both from +resentment and from the fear of being misunderstood, that he offered +him a rosy-cheeked apple his mother had given him as he left for +school. The boy was tyrant and sneak together--a combination to be +seen sometimes in a working man set over his fellows, and in a rich +man grown poor, and bent upon making money again. The boy took the +apple, never doubted Clare gave it him to curry favour, ate it up +grinning, and threw the core in his face. Clare turned away with a +sigh, and betook himself to his handkerchief again, The boy burst into +a guffaw of hideous laughter. + + + +Chapter IX. + +Clare the defender. + + +This enemy was a trouble, more or less, to every decent person in the +neighbourhood. It was well his mother was a widow, for where she was +only powerless to restrain, the father would have encouraged. He was a +big, idle, sneering, insolent lad--such that had there been two more +of the sort, they would have made the village uninhabitable. It was +all the peaceable vicar could do to keep his hands off him. + +One day, little Mary being then about five years old, Clare had her +out for a walk. They were alone in a narrow lane, not far from the +farm where Clare was so much at home. To his consternation, for he had +his sister in charge, down the lane, meeting them, came the village +tyrant. He strolled up with his hands in his pockets, and barred their +way. But while, his eye chiefly on Clare, he “straddled” like +Apollyon, but not “quite over the whole breadth of the way,” Mary +slipped past him. The young brute darted after the child. Clare put +down his head, as he had seen the rams do, and as Simpson, who ill +deserved the name of the generous Jewish Hercules, was on the point of +laying hold of her, caught him in the flank, butted him into the +ditch, and fell on the top of him. + +“Run, Maly!” he cried; “I'll be after you in a moment.” + +“Will you, you little devil!” cried the bully; and taking him by the +throat, so that he could not utter even a gurgle, got up and began to +beat him unmercifully. But the sounds of their conflict had reached +the ears of the bull Nimrod, who was feeding within the hedge. He +recognized Clare's voice, perhaps knew from it that he was in trouble; +but I am inclined to think pure bull-love of a row would alone have +sent him tearing to the quarter whence the tyrant's brutal bellowing +still came. There, looking over the hedge, he saw his friend in the +clutches of an enemy of his own, for Simpson never lost a chance of +teasing Nimrod when he could do so with safety. Over he came with a +short roar and a crash. Looking up, the bully saw a bigger bully than +himself, with his head down and horns level, retreating a step or two +in preparation for running at him. Simpson shoved the helpless Clare +toward the enemy and fled. Clare fell. Nimrod jumped over his +prostrate friend and tore after Simpson. Clare got up and would at +once have followed to protect his enemy, but that he must first see +his sister safe. He ran with her to a cottage hard by, handed her to +the woman at the door of it, and turning pursued Simpson and the bull. + +Nimrod overtook his enemy in the act of scrambling over a five-barred +gate. Simpson saw the head of the bull coming down upon him like the +bows of a Dutchman upon a fishing-boat, and, paralyzed with terror, +could not move an inch further. Crash against the gate came the horns +of Nimrod, with all the weight and speed of his body behind them. Away +went the gate into the field, and away went Simpson and the bull with +it, the latter nearly breaking his neck, for his horns were entangled +in the bars, one of them by the diagonal bar. Simpson's right leg was +jammed betwixt the gate and the head and horns of the bull. He roared, +and his roars maddened Nimrod, furious already that he could not get +his horns clear. Shake and pull as he might, the gate stuck to them; +and Simpson fared little the better that the bull's quarrel was for +the moment with the gate, and not with the leg between him and it. + +Clare had not seen the catastrophe, and did not know what had become +of pursuer or pursued, until he reached the gap where the gate had +been. He saw then the odd struggle going on, and ran to the aid of his +foe, in terror of what might already have befallen him. The moment he +laid hold of one of the animal's horns, infuriated as Nimrod was with +his helpless entanglement, he knew at once who it was, and was quiet; +for Clare always took him by the horn when first he went up to +him. Without a moment's demur he yielded to the small hands as they +pushed and pulled his head this way and that until they got it clear +of the gate. But then they did not let him go. Clare proceeded to take +him home, and Nimrod made no objection. Simpson lay groaning. + +When Clare returned, his enemy was there still. He had got clear of +the gate, but seemed in much pain, for he lay tearing up the grass and +sod in handfuls. When Clare stooped to ask what he should do for him, +he struck him a backhanded blow on the face that knocked him +over. Clare got up and ran. + +“Coward!” cried Simpson; “to leave a man with a broken leg to get home +by himself!” + +“I'm going to find some one strong enough to help you,” said Clare. + +But Simpson, after his own evil nature, imagined he was going to let +the bull into the field again, and fell to praying him not to leave +him. Clare knew, however, that, if his leg was broken, he could not +get him home, neither could he get home by himself; so he made haste +to tell the people at the farm, and Simpson lay in terror of the bull +till help came. + +From that hour he hated Clare, attributing to him all the ill he had +brought on himself. But he was out of mischief for a while. The +trouble fell on his mother--who deserved it, for she would believe no +ill of him, because he was _hers_. One good thing of the affair was, +that the bully was crippled for life, and could do the less harm. + +It was a great joy to Mr. Person to learn how Clare had defended his +sister. Clergyman as he was, and knowing that Jesus Christ would never +have returned a blow, and that this spirit of the Lord was what saved +the world, he had been uneasy that his adopted child behaved just like +Jesus. That a man should be so made as not to care to return a blow, +never occurred to Mr. Porson as possible. It was therefore an +immeasurable relief to his feelings as an Englishman, to find that the +boy was so far from being destitute of pluck, that in defence of his +sister he had attacked a fellow twice his size. + +“Weren't you afraid of such a big rascal?” he said. + +“No, papa,” answered the boy. “Ought I to have been?” + +He put his hand to his forehead, as if trying to understand. His +father found he had himself something to think about. + +There was a certain quiescence about Clare, ill to describe, +impossible to explain, but not the less manifest. Like an infant, he +never showed surprise at anything. Whatever came to him he received, +questioning nothing, marvelling at nothing, disputing nothing. What he +was told to do he went to do, never with even a momentary show of +disinclination, leaving book or game with readiness but no +eagerness. He would do deftly what was required of him, and return to +his place, with a countenance calm and sweet as the moon in highest +heaven. He seldom offered a caress except to little Mary; yet would +choose, before anything else, a place by his mother's knee. The moment +she, or his father in her absence, entered the room and sat down, he +would rise, take his stool, and set it as near as he thought he +might. When caressed he never turned away, or looked as if he would +rather be let alone; at the same time he received the caress so +quietly, and with so little response, that often, when his heavenly +look had drawn the heart of some mother, or spinster with motherly +heart, he left an ache in the spirit he would have gone to the world's +end to comfort. He never sought love--otherwise than by getting near +the loved. When anything was given him, he would look up and smile, +but he seldom showed much pleasure, or went beyond the regulation +thanks. But if at such a moment little Mary were by, he had a curious +way of catching her up and presenting her to the giver. Whether this +was a shape his thanks took, whether Mary was to him an incorporate +gratitude, or whether he meant to imply that she was the fitter on +whom to shower favour, it were hard to say. His mother observed, and +in her mind put the two things together, that he did not seem to prize +much any mere possession. He looked pleased with a new suit of +clothes, but if any one remarked on his care of them, he would answer, +“I mustn't spoil what's papa and mamma's!” He made no hoard of any +kind. He did once hoard marbles till he had about a hundred; then it +was discovered that they were for a certain boy in the village who was +counted half-witted--as indeed was Clare himself by many. When he +learned that the boy had first been accused of stealing them--for no +one would believe that another boy had given them to him--and after +that robbed of them by the other boys, on the ground that he did not +know how to play with them, Clare saw that it was as foolish to hoard +for another as for himself. + +He was a favourite with few beyond those that knew him well. Many who +saw him only at church, or about the village, did not take to him. His +still regard repelled them. In Naples they would have said he had the +evil eye. I think people had a vague sense of rebuke in his +presence. Even his mother, passionately loving her foundling, was +aware of a film between them through which she could not quite see +him, beyond which there was something she could not get at, Clare knew +nothing of such a separation. He seemed to himself altogether close to +his mother, was aware of nothing between to part them. The cause of +the thing was, that Clare was not yet in flower. His soul was a white +half-blown bud, not knowing that it was but half-blown. It basked in +the glory of the warm sun, but only with the underside of its +flower-leaves; it had not opened its heart, the sun-side of its +petals, to the love in which it was immerged. He received the love as +a matter of course, and loved it as a matter of course. But for the +cruel Simpson he would not have known there could be any other way of +things. He did not yet know that one must not only love but mean to +love, must not only bask in the warmth of love, but know it as love, +and where it comes from--love again the fountain whence it flows. + + + +Chapter X. + +The black aunt. + + +Clare was yet in his tenth year when an unhealthy summer came. The sun +was bright and warm as in other summers, and the flowers in field and +garden appeared as usual when the hour arrived for them to wake and +look abroad; but the children of men did not fare so well as the +children of the earth. A peculiar form of fever showed itself in the +village. It was not very fatal, yet many were so affected as to be +long unable to work. There was consequently much distress beyond the +suffering of the fever itself. The parson and his wife went about from +morning to night among the cottagers, helping everybody that needed +help. They had no private fortune, but the small blanket of the +benefice they spread freely over as many as it could be stretched to +cover, depriving themselves of a good part of the food to which they +had been accustomed, and of several degrees of necessary warmth. When +at last the strength of the parson gave way, and the fever laid hold +of him, he had to do without many comforts his wife would gladly have +got for him. They were both of rather humble origin, having but one +relative well-to-do, a sister of Mrs. Porson, who had married a rich +but very common man. From her they could not ask help. She had never +sent them any little present, and had been fiercely indignant with +them for adopting Clare. + +Neither of them once complained, though Mrs. Person, whose strength +was much spent, could not help weeping sometimes when she was alone +and free to weep. They knew their Lord did not live in luxury, and a +secret gladness nestled in their hearts that they were allowed to +suffer a little with him for the sake of the flock he had given into +their charge. + +The children of course had to share in the general gloom, but it did +not trouble them much. For Clare, he was not easily troubled with +anything. Always ready to help, he did not much realize what suffering +was; and he had Mary to look after, which was labour and pleasure, +work and play and pay all in one. His mother was at ease concerning +her child when she knew her in Clare's charge, and was free to attend +to her husband. She often said that if ever any were paid for being +good to themselves, she and her husband were vastly overpaid for +taking such a child from the shuddering arms of the earthquake. + +But John Porson's hour was come. He must leave wife and children and +parish, and go to him who had sent him. If any one think it hard he +should so fare in doing his duty, let him be silent till he learn what +the parson himself thought of the matter when he got home. People talk +about death as the gosling might about life before it chips its +egg. Take up their way of lamentation, and we shall find it an +endless injustice to have to get up every morning and go to bed every +night. Mrs. Porson wept, but never thought him or herself +ill-used. And had she been low enough to indulge in self-pity, it +would have been thrown away, for before she had time to wonder how she +was to live and rear her children, she too was sent for. In this world +she was not one of those mothers of little faith who trust God for +themselves but not for their children, and when again with her +husband, she would not trust God less. + +Clare was in the garden when Sarah told him she was dead. He stood +still for a moment, then looked up, up into the blue. Why he looked +up, he could not have told; but ever since that terrible morning of +which the vague burning memory had never passed, when the great dome +into which he was gazing, burst and fell, he had a way every now and +then of standing still and looking up. His face was white. Two slow +tears gathered, rolled over, and dried upon his face. He turned to +Mary, lifted her in his arms, and, carrying her about the garden, once +more told her his strange version of what had happened in his +childhood. Then he told her that her papa and mamma had gone to look +for his papa and mamma--“somewhere up in the dome,” he said. + +When they wanted to take Mary to see what was left of her mother, the +boy contrived to prevent them. From morning till night he never lost +sight of the child. + +One cold noon in October, when the clouds were miles deep in front of +the sun, when the rain was falling thick on the yellow leaves, and all +the paths were miry, the two children sat by the kitchen fire. Sarah +was cooking their mid-day meal, which had come from her own +pocket. She was the only servant either of them had known in the +house, and she would not leave it until some one should take charge of +them. The neighbours, dreading infection, did not come near +them. Clare sat on a little stool with Mary on his knees, nestling in +his bosom; but he felt dreary, for he saw no love-firmament over him; +the cloud of death hid it. + +With a sudden jingle and rattle, up drove a rickety post-chaise to the +door of the parsonage. Out of it, and into the kitchen, came stalking +a tall middle-aged woman, in a long black cloak, black bonnet, and +black gloves, with a face at once stern and peevish. + +“I am the late Mrs. Porson's sister,” she said, and stood. + +Sarah courtesied and waited. Clare rose, with Mary in his arms. + +“This is little Maly, ma'am,” he said, offering her the child. + +“Set her down, and let me see her,” she answered. + +Clare obeyed. Mary put her finger in her mouth, and began to cry. She +did not like the look of the black aunt, and was not used to a harsh +voice. + +“Tut! tut!” said the black aunt. “Crying already! That will never do! +Show me her things.” + +Sarah felt stunned. This was worse than death! “If only the mistress +had taken them with her!” she said to herself. + +Mary's things--they were not many--were soon packed. Within an hour +she was borne off, shrieking, struggling, and calling Clay. The black +aunt, however,--as the black aunt Clare always thought of her--cared +nothing for her resistance; and Clare, who at her first cry was +rushing to the rescue, ready once more to do battle for her, was +seized and held back by Farmer Goodenough. Sarah had sent for him, and +he had come--just in time to frustrate Clare's valour. + +The carriage was not yet out of sight, when Farmer Goodenough began to +repent that he had come: his presence was an acknowledgment of +responsibility! Something must be done with the foundling! There was +nobody to claim him, and nobody wanted him! He had always liked the +boy, but he did not want him! His wife was not fond of the boy, nor of +any boy, and did not want him! He had said to her that Clare could not +be left to starve, and she had answered, “Why not?”! What was to be +done with him? Nobody knew--any more than Clare himself. But which of +us knows what is going to be done with him? + +Clare was nobody's business. English farmers no more than French are +proverbial for generosity; and Farmer Goodenough, no bad type of his +class, had a wife in whose thoughts not the pence but the farthings +dominated. She was one who at once recoiled and repelled--one of those +whose skin shrinks from the skin of their kind, and who are specially +apt to take unaccountable dislikes--a pitiable human animal of the +leprous sort. She “never took to the foundling,” she said. To have +neither father nor mother, she counted disreputable. But I believe the +main source of her dislike to Clare was a feeling of undefined reproof +in the very atmosphere of the boy's presence, his nature was so +different from hers. What urged him toward his fellow-creatures, made +her draw back from him. In truth she hated the boy. The very look of +him made her sick, she said. It was only a certain respect for the +parson, and a certain fear of her husband, who, seldom angry, was yet +capable of fury, that had prevented her from driving the child, “with +his dish-clout face,” off the premises, whenever she saw him from door +or window. It was no wonder the farmer should he at his wits' end to +know what, as churchwarden, guardian of the poor, and friend of the +late vicar--as friendly also to the boy himself, he was bound to do. + +“Where are _you_ going?” he asked Sarah. + +“Where the Lord wills,” answered the old woman. Her ark had gone to +pieces, and she hardly cared what became of her. + +“We've got to look to ourselves!” said the farmer. + +“Parson used to say there was One as took that off our hands!” replied +Sarah. + +“Yes, yes,” assented Mr. Goodenough, fidgeting a little; “but the +Almighty helps them as helps themselves, and that's sound +doctrine. You really must do something, Sarah! We can't have you on +the parish, you know!” + +“I beg your pardon, sir, but until the child here is provided for, or +until they turn us out of the parsonage, I will not leave the place.” + +“The furniture is advertised for sale. You'll have nothing but the +bare walls!” + +“We'll manage to keep each other warm!--Shan't we, Clare?” + +“I will try to keep you warm, Sarah,” responded the boy sadly. + +“But the new parson will soon be here. Our souls must be cared for!” + +“Is the Lord's child that came from heaven in an earthquake to be +turned out into the cold for fear the souls of big men should perish?” + +“Something must be done about it!” said the farmer. + +“What it's to be I can't tell! It's no business o' mine any way!” + +“That's what the priest, and the Levite, and the farmer says!” + returned Sarah. + +“Won't you ask Mr. Goodenough to stay to dinner?” said Clare. + +He went up to the farmer, who in his perplexity had seated himself, +and laid his arm on his shoulder. + +“No, I can't,” answered Sarah. “He would eat all we have, and not have +enough!” + +“Now Maly is gone,” returned Clare, “I would rather not have any +dinner.” + +The farmer's old feeling for the boy, which the dread of having him +left on his hands had for the time dulled, came back. + +“Get him his dinner, Sarah,” he said. “I've something to see to in the +village. By the time I come back, he'll be ready to go with me, +perhaps.” + +“God bless you, sir!” cried Sarah. “You meant it all the time, an' I +been behavin' like a brute!” + +The farmer did not like being taken up so sharply. He had promised +nothing! But he had nearly made up his mind that, as the friend of the +late parson, he could scarcely do less than give shelter to the child +until he found another refuge. True, he was not the parson's child, +but he had loved him as his own! He would make the boy useful, and so +shut his wife's mouth! There were many things Clare could do about the +place! + + + +Chapter XI. + +Clare on the farm. + + +When Mr. Goodenough appeared at the house-door with the boy, his +wife's face expressed what her tongue dared not utter without some +heating of the furnace behind it. But Clare never saw that he was +unwelcome. He had not begun to note outward and visible signs in +regard to his own species; his observation was confined to the +animals, to whose every motion and look he gave heed. But he was +hardly aware of watching even them: his love made it so natural to +watch, and so easy to understand them! He was not drawn to study +Mrs. Goodenough, or to read her indications; he was content to hear +what she said. + +True to her nature, Mrs. Goodenough, seeing she could not at once get +rid of the boy, did her endeavour to make him pay for his +keep. Nominally he continued to attend the village school, where the +old master was doing his best for him; but, oftener than not, she +interposed to prevent his going, and turned him to use about the +house, the dairy, and the poultry-yard. + +His new mode of life occasioned him no sense of hardship. I do not +mean because of his patient acceptance of everything that came; but +because he had been so long accustomed to the ways of a farm, to all +the phases of life and work in yard and field, that nothing there came +strange to him--except having to stick to what he was put to, and +having next to no time to read. Many boys who have found much +amusement in doing this or that, find it irksome the moment it is +required of them: Clare was not of that mean sort; he was a +gentleman. Happily he was put to no work beyond his strength. + +At first, and for some time, he had to do only with the creatures more +immediately under the care of “the mistress,” whence his acquaintance +with the poultry and the pigs, the pigeons and the calves--and +specially with such as were delicate or had been hurt--with their ways +of thinking and their carriage and conduct, rapidly increased. + +By and by, however, having already almost ceased to attend school, the +farmer, requiring some passing help a boy could give, took him from +his wife--not without complaint on her part, neither without sense of +relief, and would not part with him again. He was so quick in doing +what was required, so intelligent to catch the meaning not always +thoroughly expressed, so cheerful, and so willing, that he was a +pleasure to Mr. Goodenough--and no less a pleasure to the farmer that +dwelt in Mr. Goodenough, and seemed to most men all there was of him; +for, instead of an expense, he found him a saving. + +It was much more pleasant for Clare to be with his master than with +his mistress, but he fared the worse for it in the house. The woman's +dislike of the boy must find outlet; and as, instead of flowing all +day long, it was now pent up the greater part of it, the stronger it +issued when he came home to his meals. I will not defile my page with +a record of the modes in which she vented her spite. It sought at +times such minuteness of indulgence, that it was next to impossible +for any one to perceive its embodiments except the boy himself. + +He now came more into contact with the larger animals about the place; +and the comfort he derived from them was greater than most people +would readily or perhaps willingly believe. He had kept up his +relations with Nimrod, the bull, and there was never a breach of the +friendship between them. The people about the farm not unfrequently +sought his influence with the animal, for at times they dared hardly +approach him. Clare even made him useful--got a little work out of him +now and then. But his main interest lay in the horses. He had up to +this time known rather less of them than of the other creatures on the +place; now he had to give his chief attention to them, laying in love +the foundation of that knowledge which afterward stood him in such +stead when he came to dwell for a time among certain eastern tribes +whose horses are their chief gladness and care. He used, when alone +with them, to talk to this one or that about the friends he had +lost--his father and mother and Maly and Sarah--and did not mind if +they all listened. He would even tell them sometimes about his own +father and mother--how the whole sky full of angels fell down upon +them and took them away. But he said most about his sister. For her he +mourned more than for any of the rest. Her screams as the black aunt +carried her away, would sometimes come back to him with such +verisimilitude of nearness, that, forgetting everything about him, he +would start to run to her. He felt somehow that it was well with the +others, but Maly had always needed _him_, and more than ever in the +last days of their companionship. He wept for nobody but Maly. In the +night he would wake up suddenly, thinking he heard her crying out for +him. Then he would get out of bed, creep to the stable, go to +Jonathan, and to him pour out his low-voiced complaint. Jonathan was +the biggest and oldest horse on the farm. + +How much he thought they understood of what he told them, I cannot +say. He was never silly; and where we cannot be sure, we may yet have +reason to hope. He believed they knew when he was in trouble, and +sympathized with him, and would gladly have relieved him of his +pain. I suspect most animals know something of the significance of +tears. More animals shed tears themselves than people think. + +For dogs, bless them, they are everywhere, and the boy had known them +from time immemorial. + +In the village, some of Clare's old admirers began to remark that he +no longer “looked the little gentleman.” This was caused chiefly by +the state of his clothes. They were not fit for the work to which he +was put, and within a few weeks were very shabby. Besides, he was +growing rapidly, so that he and his garments were in too evident +process of parting company. Accustomed to a mother's attentions, he +had never thought of his clothes except to take care of them for her +sake; now he tried to mend them, but soon found his labour of little +use. He had no wages to buy anything with. His clothes or his health +or his education were nothing to Mrs. Goodenough. It was no concern of +hers whether he looked decent or not. What right had such as he to +look decent? It was more than enough that she fed him! The shabbiness +of the beggarly creature was a consolation to her. + +But Clare's toil in the open air, and his constant and willing +association with the animals, had begun to give him a bucolic +appearance. He grew a trifle browner, and showed here and there a +freckle. His health was splendid. Nothing seemed to hurt him. Hardship +was wholesome to him. To the eyes that hated him, and grudged the hire +of the mere food by which he grew, he seemed every day to enlarge +visibly. Already he gave promise of becoming a man of more than +ordinary strength and vigour. Possibly the animals gave him something. + +What may have been his outlook and hope all this time, who shall tell! +He never grumbled, never showed sign of pain or unwillingness, gave +his mistress no reason for fault-finding. She found it hard even to +discover a pretext. She seemed always ready to strike him, but was +probably afraid to do so without provocation her husband would count +sufficient. Clare never showed discomfort, never even sighed except he +were alone. Chequered as his life had been, if ever he looked forward +to a fresh change, it was but as a far possibility in the slow current +of events. But he was constantly possessed with a large dim sense of +something that lay beyond, waiting for him; something toward which the +tide of things was with certainty drifting him, but with which he had +nothing more to do than wait. He did not see that to do the things +given him to do was the only preparation for whatever, in the dim +under-world of the future, might be preparing for him; but he did feel +that he must do his work. He did not then think much about duty. He +was actively inclined, had a strong feeling for doing a thing as it +ought to be done; and was thoroughly loyal to any one that seemed to +have a right over him. In this blind, enduring, vaguely hopeful way, +he went on--sustained, and none the less certainly that he did not +know it, from the fountain of his life. When the winter came, his +sufferings, cared for as he had been, and accustomed to warmth and +softness, must at times have been considerable. In the day his work +was a protection, but at night the house was cold. He had, however, +plenty to eat, had no ailment, and was not to be greatly pitied. + + + +Chapter XII. + +Clare becomes a guardian of the poor. + + +Simpson, the bully of Clare's childhood, went limping about on a +crutch, permanently lame, and full of hatred toward the innocent +occasion of the injury he had brought upon himself. Ever since his +recovery, he had, loitering about in idleness, watched the boy, to +waylay and catch him at unawares. Not until Clare went to the farm, +however, did he once succeed; for it was not difficult to escape him, +so long as he had not laid actual hold on his prey. But he grew more +and more cunning, and contrived at last, by creeping along hedges and +lying in ambush like a snake, to get his hands upon him. Then the poor +boy fared ill. + +He went home bleeding and torn. The righteous churchwarden rebuked him +with severity for fighting. His mistress told him she was glad he had +met with some one to give him what he deserved, for she could hardly +keep her hands off him. He stared at her with wondering eyes, but said +nothing. She turned from them: the devil in her could not look in the +eyes of the angel in him. The next time he fell into the snare of his +enemy, he managed to conceal what had befallen him. After that he was +too wide awake to be caught. + +There was in the village a child whom nobody heeded. He was far more +destitute than Clare, but had too much liberty. He lived with a +wretched old woman who called him her grandson: whether he was or not +nobody cared. She made her livelihood by letting beds, in a cottage or +rather hovel which seemed to be her own, to wayfarers, mostly tramps, +with or without trades. The child was thus thrown into the worst of +company, and learned many sorts of wickedness. He was already a thief, +and of no small proficiency in his art. Though village-bred, he could +pick a pocket more sensitive than a clown's. Small and deft, he had +never stood before a magistrate. He was a miserable creature, +bare-footed and bare-legged; about eight years of age, but so stunted +that to the first glance he looked less than six--with keen ferret +eyes in red rims, red hair, pasty, freckled complexion, and a +generally unhealthy look; from which marks all, Clare conceived a +pitiful sympathy for him. Their acquaintance began thus:-- + +One day, during his father's last illness, he happened to pass the +door of the grandmother's hovel while the crone was administering to +Tommy a severe punishment with a piece of thick rope: she had been +sharp enough to catch him stealing from herself. Clare heard his +cries. The door being partly open, he ran in, and gave him such +assistance that they managed to bolt together from the hut. A +friendship, for long almost a silent one, was thus initiated between +them. Tommy--Clare never knew his other name, nor did the boy +himself--would off and on watch for a sight of him all day long, but +had the instinct, or experience, never to approach him if any one was +with him. He was careful not to compromise him. The instant the most +momentary _tête-à-tête_ was possible, he would rush up, offer him +something he had found or stolen, and hurry away again. That he was a +thief Clare had not the remotest suspicion. He had never offered him +anything to suggest theft. + +By and by it came to the knowledge of Clare's enemy that there was a +friendship between them, and the discovery wrought direness for +both. One day Simpson saw Clare coming, and Tommy watching him. He +laid hold of Tommy, and began cuffing him and pulling his hair, to +make him scream, thinking thus to get hold of Clare. But +notwithstanding the lesson he had received, the rascal had not yet any +adequate notion of the boy's capacity for action where another was +concerned. He flew to the rescue, caught up the crutch Simpson had +dropped, and laid it across his back with vigour. The fellow let Tommy +go and turned on Clare, who went backward, brandishing the crutch. + +“Run, Tommy,” he cried. + +Tommy retreated a few steps. + +“Run yourself,” he counselled, having reached a safe distance. “Take +his third leg with you.” + +Clare saw the advice was good, and ran. But the next moment reflection +showed him the helplessness of his enemy. He turned, and saw him +hobbling after him in such evident pain and discomfiture, that he went +to meet him, and politely gave him his crutch. He might have thrown it +to him and gone on, but he had a horror of rudeness, and handed it to +him with a bow. Just as he regained his perpendicular, the crutch +descended on his head, and laid him flat on the ground. There the +tyrant belaboured him. Tommy stood and regarded the proceeding. + +“The cove's older an' bigger an' pluckier than me,” he said to +himself; “but he's an ass. He'll come to grief unless he's looked +after. He'll be hanged else. He don't know how to dodge. I'll have to +take him in charge!” + +When he saw Clare free, an event to which he had contributed nothing, +he turned and ran home. + +Simpson redoubled now his persecution of Clare, and persecuted Tommy +because of Clare. He lurked for Tommy now, and when he caught him, +tormented him with choice tortures. In a word, he made his life +miserable. After every such mischance Tommy would hurry to the farm, +and lie about in the hope of a sight of Clare, or possibly a chance of +speaking to him. His repute was so bad that he dared not show himself. + +Hot tears would come into Clare's eyes as he listened to the not +always unembellished tale of Tommy's sufferings at the hands of +Simpson; but he never thought of revenge, only of protection or escape +for the boy. It comforted him to believe that he was growing, and +would soon be a match for the oppressor. + +Whether at this time he felt any great interest in life, or recognized +any personal advantage in growing, I doubt. But he had the friendship +of the animals; and it is not surprising that creatures their maker +thinks worth making and keeping alive, should yield consolation to one +that understands them, or even fill with a mild joy the pauses of +labour in an irksome life. + +Then each new day was an old friend to the boy. Each time the sun +rose, new hope rose with him in his heart. He came every morning fresh +from home, with a fresh promise. The boy read the promise in his great +shining, and believed it; gazed and rejoiced, and turned to his work. + +But the hour arrived when his mistress could bear his presence no +longer. Some petty loss, I imagine, had befallen her. Nothing touched +her like the loss of money--the love of which is as dread a passion as +the love of drink, and more ruinous to the finer elements of the +nature. It was like the tearing out of her heart to Mrs. Goodenough to +lose a shilling. Her self-command forsook her, perhaps, in some such +moment of vexation; anyhow, she opened the sluices of her hate, and +overwhelmed him with it in the presence of her husband. + +The farmer knew she was unfair, knew the orphan a good boy and a +diligent, knew there was nothing against him but the antipathy of his +wife. But, annoyed with her injustice, he was powerless to change her +heart. Since the boy came to live with them, he had had no pleasure in +his wife's society. She had always been moody and dissatisfied, but +since then had been unbearable. Constantly irritated with and by her +because of Clare, he had begun to regard him as the destroyer of his +peace, and to feel a grudge against him. He sat smouldering with +bodiless rage, and said nothing. + +Clare too was silent,--for what could he say? Where is the wisdom that +can answer hatred? He carried to his friend Jonathan a heart heavy and +perplexed. + +“Why does she hate me so, Jonathan?” he murmured. + +The big horse kissed his head all over, but made him no other answer. + + + +Chapter XIII. + +Clare the vagabond. + + +The next morning Clare happened to do something not altogether to the +farmer's mind. It was a matter of no consequence--only cleaning that +side of one of the cow-houses first which was usually cleaned last. He +gave him a box on the ear that made him stagger, and then stand +bewildered. + +“What do you mean by staring that way?” cried the farmer, annoyed with +himself and seeking justification in his own eyes. “Am I not to box +your ears when I choose?” And with that he gave him another blow. + +Then first it dawned on Clare that he was not wanted, that he was no +good to anybody. He threw down his scraper, and ran from the +cow-house; ran straight from the farm to the lane, and from the lane +to the high road. Buffets from the hand of his only friend, and the +sudden sense of loneliness they caused, for the moment bereft Clare of +purpose. It was as if his legs had run away with him, and he had +unconsciously submitted to their abduction. + +At the mouth of the lane, where it opened on the high road, he ran +against Tommy turning the corner, eager to find him. The eyes of the +small human monkey were swollen with weeping; his nose was bleeding, +and in size and shape scarce recognizable as a nose. At the sight, the +consciousness of his protectorate awoke in Clare, and he stopped, +unable to speak, but not unable to listen. Tommy blubbered out a +confused, half-inarticulate something about “granny and the other +devil,” who between them had all but killed him. + +“What can I do?” said Clare, his heart sinking with the sense of +having no help in him. + +Tommy was ready to answer the question. He had been hatching vengeance +all the way. Eagerly came his proposition--that they should, in their +turn, lie in ambush for Simpson, and knock his crutch from under +him. That done, Clare should belabour him with it, while he ran like +the wind and set his grandmother's house on fire. + +“She'll be drunk in bed, an' she'll be burned to death!” cried +Tommy. “Then we'll mizzle!” + +“But it would hurt them both very badly, Tommy!” said Clare, as if +unfolding the reality of the thing to a foolish child. + +“Well! all right! the worse the better! 'Ain't they hurt us?” rejoined +Tommy. + +“That's how we know it's not nice!” answered Clare. “If they set it a +going, we ain't to keep it a going!” + +“Then they'll be at it for ever,” cried Tommy, “an' I'm sick of it! +I'll _kill_ granny! I swear I will, if I'm hanged for it! She's said a +hundred times she'd pull my legs when I was hanged; but _she_ won't be +at the hanging!” + +“Why shouldn't you run for it first?” said Clare. “Then they wouldn't +want to hang you!” + +“Then I shouldn't have nobody!” replied Tommy, whimpering. + +“I should have thought Nobody was as good as granny!” said Clare. + +“A big bilin' better!” answered Tommy bitterly. “I wasn't meanin' +granny--nor yet stumpin' Simpson.” + +“I don't know what you're driving at,” said Clare. Tommy burst into +tears. + +“Ain't you the only one I got, up or down?” he cried. + +Tommy had a little bit of heart--not much, but enough to have a chance +of growing. If ever creature had less than that, he was not human. I +do not think he could even be an ape. + +Some of the people about the parson used to think Clare had no heart, +and Mrs. Goodenough was sure of it. He had not a spark of gratitude, +she said. But the cause of this opinion was that Clare's affection +took the shape of deeds far more than of words. Never were judges of +their neighbours more mistaken. The chief difference between Clare's +history and that of most others was, that his began at the unusual +end. Clare began with loving everybody; and most people take a long +time to grow to that. Hence, those whom, from being brought nearest to +them, he loved specially, he loved without that outbreak of show which +is often found in persons who love but a few, and whose love is +defiled with partisanship. He loved quietly and constantly, in a +fashion as active as undemonstrative. He was always glad to be near +those he specially loved; beyond that, the signs of his love were +practical--it came out in ministration, in doing things for +them. There are those who, without loving, desire to be loved, because +they love themselves; for those that are worth least are most precious +to themselves. But Clare never thought of the love of others to +him--from no heartlessness, but that he did not think about +himself--had never done so, at least, until the moment when he fled +from the farm with the new agony in his heart that nobody wanted him, +that everybody would be happier without him. Happy is he that does not +think of himself before the hour when he becomes conscious of the +bliss of being loved. For it must be and ought to be a happy moment +when one learns that another human creature loves him; and not to be +grateful for love is to be deeply selfish. Clare had always loved, but +had not thought of any one as loving him, or of himself as being loved +by any one. + +“Well,” rejoined Clare, struggling with his misery, “ain't I going +myself?” + +“You going!--That's chaff!” + +“'Tain't chaff. I'm on my way.” + +“What! Going to hook it? Oh golly! what a lark! Won't Farmer +Goodenough look blue!” + +“He'll think himself well rid of me,” returned Clare with a sigh. “But +there's no time to talk. If you're going, Tommy, come along.” + +He turned to go. + +“Where to?” asked Tommy, following. + +“I don't know. Anywhere away,” answered Clare, quickening his pace. + +In spite of his swollen visage, Tommy's eyes grew wider. + +“You 'ain't cribbed nothing?” he said. + +“I don't know what you mean.” + +“You 'ain't stole something?” interpreted Tommy. + +Clare stopped, and for the first time on his own part, lifted his hand +to strike. It dropped immediately by his side. + +“No, you poor Tommy,” he said. “I don't steal.” + +“Thought you didn't! What are you running away for then?” + +“Because they don't want me.” + +“Lord! what will you do?” + +“Work.” + +Tommy held his tongue: he knew a better way than that! If work was the +only road to eating, things would go badly with _him_! But he thought +he knew a thing or two, and would take his chance! There were degrees +of hunger that were not so bad as the thrashings he got, for in his +granny's hands the rope might fall where it would; while all cripple +Simpson cared for was to make him squeal satisfactorily. But work was +worse than all! He would go with Clare, but not to work! Not he! + +Clare kept on in silence, never turning his head--out into the +untried, unknown, mysterious world, which lay around the one spot he +knew as the darkness lies about the flame of the candle. They walked +more than a mile before either spoke. + + + +Chapter XIV. + +Their first helper + + +It was a lovely spring morning. The sun was about thirty degrees above +the horizon, shining with a liquid radiance, as if he had already +drawn up and was shining through the dew of the morning, though it lay +yet on all the grasses by the roadside, turning them into gem-plants. +Every sort of gem sparkled on their feathery or beady tops, and their +long slender blades. At the first cottages they passed, the women were +beginning their day's work, sweeping clean their floors and +door-steps. Clare noted that where were most flowers in the garden, +the windows were brightest, and the children cleanest. + +“The flowers come where they make things nice for them!” he said to +himself. “Where the flowers see dirt, they turn away, and won't come +out.” + +From childhood he had had the notion that the flowers crept up inside +the stalks until they found a window to look out at. Where the +prospect was not to their mind they crept down, and away by some door +in the root to try again. For all the stalks stood like watch-towers, +ready for them to go up and peep out. + +They came to a pond by a farm-house. Clare had been observing with +pity how wretched Tommy's clothes were; but when he looked into the +pond he saw that his own shabbiness was worse than Tommy's downright +miserableness. Nobody would leave either of them within reach of +anything worth stealing! What he wore had been his Sunday suit, and it +was not even worth brushing! + +“I'm 'orrid 'ungry,” said Tommy. “I 'ain't swallered a plug this +mornin', 'xcep' a lump o' bread out o' granny's cupboard. That's what +I got my weltin' for. It were a whole half-loaf, though--an' none so +dry!” + +Clare had eaten nothing, and had been up since five o'clock--at work +all the time till the farmer struck him: he was quite as hungry as +Tommy. What was to be done? Besides a pocket-handkerchief he had but +one thing alienable. + +The very day she was taken ill, he had been in the store-room with his +mother, and she, knowing the pleasure he took in the scent of brown +Windsor-soap, had made him a present of a small cake. This he had kept +in his pocket ever since, wrapt in a piece of rose-coloured paper, his +one cherished possession: hunger deadening sorrow, the time was come +to bid it farewell. His heart ached to part with it, but Tommy and he +were so hungry! + +They went to the door of the house, and knocked--first Clare very +gently, then Tommy with determination. It was opened by a matron who +looked at them over the horizon of her chin. + +“Please, ma'am,” said Clare, “will you give us a piece of bread?--as +large a piece, please, as you can spare; and I will give you this +piece of brown Windsor-soap.” + +As he ended his speech, he took a farewell whiff of his favourite +detergent. + +“Soap!” retorted the dame. “Who wants your soap! Where did you get it? +Stole it, I don't doubt! Show it here.” + +She took it in her hand, and held it to her nose. + +“Who gave it you?” + +“My mother,” answered Clare. + +“Where's your mother?” + +Clare pointed upward. + +“Eh? Oh--hanged! I thought, so!” + +She threw the soap into the yard, and closed the door. Clare darted +after his property, pounced upon it, and restored it lovingly to his +pocket. + +As they were leaving the yard disconsolate, they saw a cart full of +turnips. Tommy turned and made for it. + +“Don't, Tommy,” cried Clare. + +“Why not? I'm hungry,” answered Tommy, “an' you see it's no use +astin'!” + +He flew at the cart, but Clare caught and held him. + +“They ain't ours, Tommy,” he said. + +“Then why don't you take one?” retorted Tommy. + +“That's why you shouldn't.” + +“It's why you should, for then it 'ud be yours.” + +“To take it wouldn't make it ours, Tommy.” + +“Wouldn't it, though? I believe when I'd eaten it, it would be +mine--rather!” + +“No, it wouldn't. Think of having in your stomach what wasn't yours! +No, you must pay for it. Perhaps they would take my soap for a +turnip. I believe it's worth two turnips.” + +He spied a man under a shed, ran to him, and made offer of the soap +for a turnip apiece. + +“I don't want your soap,” answered the man, “an' I don't recommend +cold turmits of a mornin'. But take one if you like, and clear +out. The master's cart-whip 'ill be about your ears the moment he sees +you!” + +“Ain't you the master, sir?” + +“No, I ain't.” + +“Then the turnips ain't yours?” said Clare, looking at him with +hungry, regretful eyes, for he could have eaten a raw potato. + +“You're a deal too impudent to be hungry!” said the man, making a blow +at him with his open hand, which Clare dodged. “Be off with you, or +I'll set the dog on you.” + +“I'm very sorry,” said Clare. “I did not mean to offend you.” + +“Clear out, I say. Double trot!” + +Hungry as the boys were, they must trudge! No bread, no turnip for +them! Nothing but trudge, trudge till they dropped! + +When they had gone about five miles further, they sat down, as if by +common consent, on the roadside; and Tommy, used to crying, began to +cry. Clare did not seek to stop him, for some instinct told him it +must be a relief. + +By and by a working-man came along the road. Clare hesitated, but +Tommy's crying urged him. He rose and stood ready to accost him. As +soon as he came up, however, the man stopped of himself. He questioned +Clare and listened to his story, then counselled the boys to go back. + +“I'm not wanted, sir,” said Clare. + +“They'd kill _me_,” said Tommy. + +“God help you, boys!” returned the man. “You may be telling me lies, +and you may be telling me the truth!--A liar may be hungry, but +somehow I grudge my dinner to a liar!” + +As he spoke he untied the knots of a blue handkerchief with white +spots, gave them its contents of bread and cheese, wiped his face with +it, and put it in his pocket; lifted his bag of tools, and went his +way. He had lost his dinner and saved his life! + +The dinner, being a man's, went a good way toward satisfying them, +though empty corners would not have been far to seek, had there been +anything to put in them. As it was, they started again refreshed and +hopeful. What had come to them once might reasonably come again! + + + +Chapter XV. + +Their first host. + + +As the evening drew on, and began to settle down into night, a new +care arose in the mind of the elder boy. Where were they to pass the +darkness?--how find shelter for sleep? It was a question that gave +Tommy no anxiety. He had been on the tramp often, now with one party, +now with another of his granny's lodgers, and had frequently slept in +the open air, or under the rudest covert. Tommy had not much +imagination to trouble him, and in his present moral condition was +possibly better without it; but to inexperienced Clare there was +something fearful in having the night come so close to him. Sleep out +of doors he had never thought of. To lie down with the stars looking +at him, nothing but the blue wind between him and them, was like being +naked to the very soul. Doubtless there would be creatures about, to +share the night with him, and protect him from its awful bareness; but +they would be few for the size of the room, and he might see none of +them! It was the sense of emptiness, the lack of present life that +dismayed him. He had never seen any creatures to shrink from. He +disliked no one of the things that creep or walk or fly. Before long +he did come to know and dislike at least one sort; and the sea held +creatures that in after years made him shudder; but as yet, not even +rats, so terrible to many, were a terror to Clare. It was Nothing that +he feared. + +My reader may say, “But had no one taught him about God?” Yes, he had +heard about God, and about Jesus Christ; had heard a great deal about +them. But they always seemed persons a long way off. He knew, or +thought he knew, that God was everywhere, but he had never felt his +presence a reality. He seemed in no place where Clare's eyes ever +fell. He never thought, “God is here.” Perhaps the sparrows knew more +about God than he did then. When he looked out into the night it +always seemed vacant, therefore horrid, and he took it for as empty as +it looked. And if there had been no God there, it would have been +reasonable indeed to be afraid; for the most frightful of notions is +_Nothing-at-all_. + +It grew dark, and they were falling asleep on their walking legs, when +they came to a barn-yard. Very glad were they to creep into it, and +search for the warmest place. It was a quiet part of the country, and +for years nothing had been stolen from anybody, so that the people +were not so watchful as in many places. + +They went prowling about, but even Tommy with innocent intent, eager +only after a little warmth, and as much sleep as they could find, and +came at length to an open window, through which they crawled into +what, by the smell and the noises, they knew to be a stable. It was +very dark, but Clare was at home, and felt his way about; while Tommy, +who was afraid of the horses, held close to him. Clare's hand fell +upon the hind-quarters of a large well-fed horse. The huge animal was +asleep standing, but at the touch of the small hand he gave a low +whinny. Tommy shuddered at the sound. + +“He's pleased,” said Clare, and crept up on his near side into the +stall. There he had soon made such friends with him, that he did not +hesitate to get in among the hay the horse had for his supper. + +“Here, Tommy!” he cried in a whisper; “there's room for us both in the +manger.” + +But Tommy stood shaking. He fancied the darkness full of horses' +heads, and would not stir. Clare had to get out again, and search for +a place to suit his fancy, which he found in an untenanted loose-box, +with remains of litter. There Tommy coiled himself up, and was soon +fast asleep. + +Clare returned to the hospitality of the big horse. The great nostrils +snuffed him over and over as he lay, and the boy knew the horse made +him welcome. He dropped asleep stroking the muzzle of his +chamber-fellow, and slept all the night, kept warm by the horse's +breath, and the near furnace of his great body. + +In the morning the boys found they had slept too long, for they were +discovered. But though they were promptly ejected as vagabonds, and +not without a few kicks and cuffs, these were not administered without +the restraint of some mercy, for their appearance tended to move pity +rather than indignation. + + + +Chapter XVI. + +On the tramp. + + +With the new day came the fresh necessity for breakfast, and the fresh +interest in the discovery of it. But breakfast is a thing not always +easiest to find where breakfasts most abound; nor was theirs when +found that morning altogether of a sort to be envied, ill as they +could afford to despise it. Passing, on their goal-less way, a +flour-mill, the door of which was half-open, they caught sight of a +heap, whether floury dust or dusty flour, it would have been hard to +say, that seemed waiting only for them to help themselves from +it. Fain to still the craving of birds too early for any worm, they +swallowed a considerable portion of it, choking as it was, nor met +with rebuke. There was good food in it, and they might have fared +worse. + +Another day's tramp was thus inaugurated. How it was to end no one in +the world knew less than the trampers. + +Before it was over, a considerable change had passed upon Clare; for a +new era was begun in his history, and he started to grow more +rapidly. Hitherto, while with his father or mother, or with his little +sister, making life happy to her; even while at the farm, doing hard +work, he had lived with much the same feeling with which he read a +story: he was in the story, half dreaming, half acting it. The +difference between a thing that passed through his brain from the +pages of a book, or arose in it as he lay in bed either awake or +asleep, and the thing in which he shared the life and motion of the +day, was not much marked in his consciousness. He was a dreamer with +open eyes and ready hands, not clearly distinguishing thought and +action, fancy and fact. Even the cold and hunger he had felt at the +farm had not sufficed to wake him up; he had only had to wait and they +were removed. But now that he did not know whence his hunger was to be +satisfied, or where shelter was to be had; now also that there was a +hunger outside him, and a cold that was not his, which yet he had to +supply and to frustrate in the person of Tommy, life began to grow +real to him; and, which was far more, he began to grow real to +himself, as a power whose part it was to encounter the necessities +thus presented. He began to understand that things were required of +him. He had met some of these requirements before, and had satisfied +them, but without knowing them as requirements. He did it half awake, +not as a thinking and willing source of the motion demanded. He did it +all by impulse, hardly by response. Now we are put into bodies, and +sent into the world, to wake us up. We might go on dreaming for ages +if we were left without bodies that the wind could blow upon, that the +rain could wet, and the sun scorch, bodies to feel thirst and cold and +hunger and wounds and weariness. The eternal plan was beginning to +tell upon Clare. He was in process of being changed from a dreamer to +a man. It is a good thing to be a dreamer, but it is a bad thing +indeed to be _only_ a dreamer. He began to see that everybody in the +world had to do something in order to get food; that he had worked for +the farmer and his wife, and they had fed him. He had worked willingly +and eaten gladly, but had not before put the two together. He saw now +that men who would be men must work. + +His eyes fell upon a congregation of rooks in a field by the +roadside. “Are _they_ working?” he thought; “or are they stealing? If +it be stealing they are at, it looks like hard work as well. It can't +be stealing though; they were made to live, and _how_ are they to live +if they don't grub? that's their work! Still the corn ain't theirs! +Perhaps it's only worms they take! Are the worms theirs? A man should +die rather than steal, papa said. But, if they are stealing, the crows +don't know it; and if they don't know it, they ain't thieves! Is that +it?” + +The same instant came the report of a gun. A crowd of rooks rose +cawing. One of them dropped and lay. + +“He must have been stealing,” thought Clare, “for see what comes of +it! Would they shoot me if I stole? Better be shot than die of hunger! +Yes, but better die of hunger than be a thief!” + +He had read stories about thieves and honest boys, and had never seen +any difficulty in the matter. Nor had he yet a notion of how difficult +it is not to be a thief--that is, to be downright honest. If anybody +thinks it easy, either he has not known much of life, or he has never +tried to be honest; he has done just like other people. Clare did not +know that many a boy whose heart sided with the honest boy in the +story, has grown up a dishonourable man--a man ready to benefit +himself to the disadvantage of others; that many a man who passes for +respectable in this disreputable world, is counted far meaner than a +thief in the next, and is going there to be put in prison. But he +began to see that it is not enough to mean well; that he must be +sharp, and mind what he was about; else, with hunger worrying inside +him, he might be a thief before he knew. He was on the way to discover +that to think rightly--to be on the side of what is honourable when +reading a story, is a very different thing from doing right, and being +honourable, when the temptation is upon us. Many a boy when he reads +this will say, “Of course it is!” and when the time comes, will be a +sneak. + +Those crows set Clare thinking; and it was well; for if he had not +done as those thinkings taught him, he would have given a very +different turn to his history. Meditation and resolve, on the top of +honourable habit, brought him to this, that, when he saw what was +right, he just did it--did it without hesitation, question, or +struggle. Every man must, who would be a free man, who would not be +the slave of the universe and of himself. + + + +Chapter XVII. + +The baker's cart. + + +The sweepings of the mill-floor did not last them long, and by the +time they saw rising before them the spires and chimneys of the small +county town to which the road had been leading them, they were very +hungry indeed--as hungry as they well could be without having begun to +grow faint. The moment he saw them, Clare began revolving in his mind +once more, as many times on the way, what he was to do to get work: +Tommy of course was too small to do anything, and Clare must earn +enough for both. He could think of nothing but going into the shops, +or knocking at the house-doors, and asking for something to do. So +filled was he with his need of work, and with the undefined sense of a +claim for work, that he never thought how much against him must be the +outward appearance which had so dismayed himself when he saw it in the +pond; never thought how unwilling any one would be to employ him, or +what a disadvantage was the company of Tommy, who had every mark of a +born thief. + +I do not know if, on his tramps, Tommy had been in a town before, but +to Clare all he saw bore the aspect of perfect novelty, +notwithstanding the few city-shapes that floated in faintest shadow, +like memories of old dreams, in his brain. He was delighted with the +grand look of the place, with its many people and many shops. His hope +of work at once became brilliant and convincing. + +Noiselessly and suddenly Tommy started from his side, but so much +occupied was he with what he beheld and what he thought, that he +neither saw him go nor missed him when gone. He became again aware of +him by finding himself pulled toward the entrance of a narrow lane. +Tommy pulled so hard that Clare yielded, and went with him into the +lane, but stopped immediately. For he saw that Tommy had under his arm +a big loaf, and the steam of newly-baked bread was fragrant in his +nostrils. Never smoke so gracious greeted those of incense-loving +priest. Tommy tugged and tugged, but Clare stood stock-still. + +“Where did you get that beautiful loaf, Tommy?” he asked. + +“Off on a baker's cart,” said Tommy. “Don't be skeered; he never saw +me! That was my business, an' I seed to 't.” + +“Then you stole it, Tommy?” + +“Yes,” grumbled Tommy, “--if that's the name you put upon it when your +trousers is so slack you've got to hold on to them or they'd trip you +up!” + +“Where's the cart?” + +“In the street there.” + +“Come along.” + +Clare took the loaf from Tommy, and turned to find the baker's +cart. Tommy's face fell, and he was conscious only of bitterness. Why +had he yielded to sentiment--not that he knew the word--when he longed +like fire to bury his sharp teeth in that heavenly loaf? Love--not to +mention a little fear--had urged him to carry it straight to Clare, +and this was his reward! He was going to give him up to the baker! +There was gratitude for you! He ought to have known better than trust +_anybody_, even Clare! Nobody was to be trusted but yourself! It did +seem hard to Tommy. + +They had scarcely turned the corner when they came upon the cart. The +baker was looking the other way, talking to some one, and Clare +thought to lay down the loaf and say nothing about it: there was no +occasion for the ceremony of apology where offence was unknown. But in +the very act the baker turned and saw him. He sprang upon him, and +collared him. The baker was not nice to look at. + +“I have you!” he cried, and shook him as if he would have shaken his +head off. + +“It's quite a mistake, sir!” was all Clare could get out, so fierce +was the earthquake that rattled the house of his life. + +“Mistaken am I? I like that!--Police!” + +And with that the baker shook him again. + +A policeman was not far off; he heard the man call, and came running. + +“Here's a gen'leman as wants the honour o' your acquaintance, Bob!” + said the baker. + +But Tommy saw that, from his size, he was more likely to get off than +Clare if he told the truth. + +“Please, policeman,” he said, “it wasn't him; it was me as took the +loaf.” + +“You little liar!” shouted the baker. “Didn't I see him with his hand +on the loaf?” + +“He was a puttin' of it back,” said Tommy. “I wish he'd been +somewheres else! See what he been an' got by it! If he'd only ha' let +me run, there wouldn't ha' been nobody the wiser. I _am_ sorry I +didn't run. Oh, I _ham_ so 'ungry!” + +Tommy doubled himself up, with his hands inside the double. + +“'Ungry, are you?” roared the baker. “That's what thieves off a +baker's cart ought to be! They ought to be always 'ungry--'ungry to +all eternity, they ought! An' that's what's goin' to be done to 'em!” + +“Look here!” cried a pale-faced man in the front of the crowd, who +seemed a mechanic. “There's a way of tellin' whether the boy's +speakin' the truth _now_!” + +He caught up the restored loaf, halved it cleverly, and handed each of +the boys a part. + +“Now, baker, what's to pay?” he said, and drew himself up, for the man +was too angry at once to reply. + +The boys were tearing at the delicious bread, blind and deaf to all +about them. + +“P'r'aps you would like to give _me_ in charge?” pursued their +saviour. + +“Sixpence,” said the man sullenly. + +The mechanic laid sixpence on the cover of the cart. + +“I ought to ha' made you weigh and make up,” he said. “Where's your +scales?” + +“Mind your own business.” + +“I mean to. Here! I want another sixpenny loaf--but I want it weighed +this time!” + +“I ain't bound to sell bread in the streets. You can go to the +shop. Them loaves is for reg'lar customers.” + +He moved off with his cart, and the crowd began to disperse. The boys +stood absorbed, each in what remained of his half-loaf. + +When he looked up, Clare saw that they were alone. But he caught sight +of their benefactor some way off, and ran after him. + +“Oh, sir!” he said, “I was so hungry, I don't know whether I thanked +you for the loaf. We'd had nothing to-day but the sweepings of a +mill.” + +“God bless my soul!” said the man. “People say there's a God!” he +added. + +“I think there must be, sir, for you came by just then!” returned +Clare. + +“How do you come to be so hard-up, my boy? Somebody's to blame +somewheres!” + +“There ain't no harm in being hungry, so long as the loaf comes!” + rejoined Clare. “When I get work we shall be all right!” + +“That's your sort!” said the man. “But if there had been a God, as +people say, he would ha' made me fit to gi'e you a job, i'stead o' +stan'in' here as you see me, with ne'er a turn o' work to do for +myself!” + +“I'll work my hardest to pay you back your sixpence,” said Clare. + +“Nay, nay, lad! Don't you trouble about that. I ha' got two or three +more i' my pocket, thank God!” + +“You have two Gods, have you, sir?” said Clare;”--one who does things +for you, and one who don't?” + +“Come, you young shaver! you're too much for me!” said the man +laughing. + +Tommy, having finished his bread, here thought fit to join them. He +came slyly up, looking impudent now he was filled, with his hands +where his pockets should have been. + +“It was you stole the loaf, you little rascal!” said the workman, +seeing thief in every line of the boy. + +“Yes,” answered Tommy boldly, “an' I don't see no harm. The baker had +lots, and he wasn't 'ungry! It was Clare made a mull of it! He's such +a duffer you don't know! He acshally took it back to the brute! He +deserved what he got! The loaf was mine. It wasn't his! _I_ stole it!” + +“Oh, ho! it wasn't his! it was yours, was it?--Why do you go about +with a chap like this, young gentleman?” said the man, turning to +Clare. “I know by your speech you 'ain't been brought up alongside o' +sech as him!” + +“I had to go away, and he came with me,” answered Clare. + +“You'd better get rid of him. He'll get you into trouble.” + +“I can't get rid of him,” replied Clare. “But I shall teach him not to +take what isn't his. He don't know better now. He's been ill-used all +his life.” + +“You don't seem over well used yourself,” said the man. + +He saw that Clare's clothes had been made for a boy in good +circumstances, though they had been long worn, and were much +begrimed. His face, his tone, his speech convinced him that they had +been made for _him_, and that he had had a gentle breeding. + +“Look you here, young master,” he continued; “you have no right to be +in company with that boy. He'll bring you to grief as sure as I tell +you.” + +“I shall be able to bear it,” answered Clare with a sigh. + +“He'll be the loss of your character to you.” + +“I 'ain't got a character to lose,” replied Clare. “I thought I had; +but when nobody will believe me, where's my character then?” + +“Now you're wrong there,” returned the man. “I'm not much, I know; but +I believe every word you say, and should be very sorry to find myself +mistaken.” + +“Thank you, sir,” said Clare. “May I carry your bag for you?” + +If Clare had seen what then passed in Tommy's mind, at the back of +those glistening ferret-eyes of his, he would have been almost +reconciled to taking the man's advice, and getting rid of him. Tommy +was saying to himself that his pal wasn't such a duffer after all--he +was on the lay for the man's tools! + +Tommy never reasoned except in the direction of cunning self-help--of +fitting means and intermediate ends to the one main object of +eating. It is wonderful what a sharpener of the poor wits hunger is! + +“I guess I'm the abler-bodied pauper!” answered the man; and picking +up the bag he had dropped at his feet while they conversed, he walked +away. + +There are many more generous persons among the poor than among the +rich--a fact that might help some to understand how a rich man should +find it hard to enter into the kingdom of heaven. It is hard for +everybody, but harder for the rich. Men who strive to make money are +unconsciously pulling instead of pushing at the heavy gate of the +kingdom. + +“Tommy!” said Clare, in a tone new to himself, for a new sense of +moral protection had risen in him, “if ever you steal anything again, +either I give you a hiding, or you and I part company.” + +Tommy bored his knuckles into his red eyes, and began to +whimper. Again it was hard for Tommy! He had followed Clare, thinking +to supply what was lacking to him; to do for him what he was not +clever enough to do for himself; in short, to make an advantageous +partnership with him, to which he should furnish the faculty of +picking up unconsidered trifles. Tommy judged Clare defective in +intellect, and quite unpractical. He was of the mind of the +multitude. The common-minded man always calls the man who thinks of +righteousness before gain, who seeks to do the will of God and does +not seek to make a fortune, unpractical. He _will_ not see that the +very essence of the practical lies in doing the right thing. + +Tommy, in a semi-conscious way, had looked to Clare to supply the +strength and the innocent look, while he supplied the head and the +lively fingers; and here was Clare knocking the lovely plan to pieces! +He did well to be angry! But Clare was the stronger; and Tommy knew +that, when Clare was roused, though it was not easy to rouse him, he +could and would and did fight--not, indeed, as the little coward said +to himself _he_ could fight, like a wild cat, but like a blundering +hornless old cow defending her calf from a cur. + +In the heart of all his selfishness, however, Tommy did a little love +Clare; and his love came, not from Tommy, but from the same source as +his desire for food, namely, from the God that was in Tommy, the God +in whom Tommy lived and had his being with Clare. Whether Tommy's love +for Clare would one day lift him up beside Clare, that is, make him an +honest boy like Clare, remained to be seen. + +Finding his demonstration make no impression, Tommy took his knuckles +out of his eye-holes and thrust them into his pocket-holes, turned his +back on his friend, and began to whistle--with a lump of self-pity in +his throat. + + + +Chapter XVIII. + +Beating the town. + + +They turned their faces again toward the centre of the town, and +resumed their walk, taking in more of what they saw than while they +had not yet had the second instalment of their daily bread. What a +thing is food! It is the divineness of the invention--the need for the +food, and the food for the need--that makes those who count their +dinner the most important thing in the day, such low creatures: +nothing but what is good in itself can be turned into vileness. It is +a delight to see a boy with a good honest appetite; a boy that _loves_ +his dinner is a loathsome creature. Eat heartily, my boy, but be ready +to share, even when you are hungry, and have only what you could eat +up yourself, else you are no man. Remember that you created neither +your hunger nor your food; that both came from one who cares for you +and your neighbours as well. + +In the strength of the half-loaf he had eaten, the place looked to +Clare far more wonderful, and his hopes of earning his bread grew yet +more radiant. But he passed one shop after another, and always +something prevented him from going in. One after another did not look +just the right sort, did not seem to invite him: the next might be +better! I dare say but for that half-loaf, he would have made a trial +sooner, but I doubt if he would have succeeded sooner. He did not +think of going to parson, doctor, or policeman for advice; he went +walking and staring, followed by Tommy with his hands in his +pocketless pocket-holes. Clare was not yet practical in device, though +perfect in willingness, and thorough in design. Up one street and down +another they wandered, seeing plenty of food through windows, and in +carts and baskets, but never any coming their way, except in the form +of tempting odours that issued from almost every house, and grew in +keenness and strength toward one o'clock. Oh those odours!--agonizing +angels of invisible yet most material good! Of what joys has not the +Father made us capable, when the poorest necessity is linked with such +pain! What a tormenting thing--and what a good must be meant to come +out of it!--to be hungry, downright, cravingly hungry with the whole +microcosm, and not a halfpenny to buy a mouthful of assuagement!--to +be assailed with wafts of deliriously undefined promise, not one of +which seems likely to be fulfilled!--promise true to men hurrying home +to dinner or luncheon, but only rousing greater desire in such as +Clare and Tommy. Not one opportunity of appropriation presented +itself, else it would have gone ill with Tommy, now that the eyes and +ears of his guardian were on the alert. For Clare thought of him now +as a little thievish pup, for whose conduct, manners, and education he +was responsible. + +The agony began at length to abate--ready to revive with augmented +strength when the next hour for supplying the human furnace should +begin to approach. Few even of those who know what hunger is, +understand to what it may grow--how desire becomes longing, longing +becomes craving, and craving a wild passion of demand. It must be +terrible to be hungry, and not know God! + +As the evening came down upon them, worn out, faint with want, +shivering with cold, and as miserable in prospect as at the moment, +yet another need presented itself with equally imperative +requisition--that of shelter that they might rest. It was even more +imperative: they could not eat; they _must_ lie down! + +Whether it be a rudiment retained from their remote ancestry, I cannot +tell, but any kind of suffering will wake in some a masterful impulse +to burrow; and as the boys walked about in their misery, white with +cold and hunger, Clare's eyes kept turning to every shallowest +archway, every breach in wall or hedge that seemed to offer the least +chance of covert, while, every now and then, Tommy would bolt from his +side to peer into some opening whose depth was not immediately patent +to his ferret-gaze. Once, in a lane on the outskirts of the town, he +darted into a narrow doorway in the face of a wall, but instantly +rushed back in horror: within was a well, where water lay still and +dark. Then first Clare had a hint of the peculiar dread Tommy had of +water, especially of water dark and unexpected. Possibly he had once +been thrown into such water to be got rid of. But Clare at the moment +was too weary to take much notice of his dismay. + +It was an old town in which they were wandering, and change in the +channels of traffic had so turned its natural nourishment aside, that +it was in parts withering and crumbling away. Not a few of the houses +were, some from poverty, some from utter disuse, yielding fast to +decay. But there were other causes for the condition of one, which, +almost directly they came out of the lane I have just mentioned, into +the end of a wide silent street, drew the roving, questing eyes of +Clare and Tommy. The moon was near the full and shining clear, so that +they could perfectly see the state it was in. Most of its windows were +broken; its roof was like the back of a very old horse; its +chimney-pots were jagged and stumped with fracture; from one of them, +by its entangled string, the skeleton of a kite hung half-way down the +front. But, notwithstanding such signs of neglect, the red-brick wall +and the wrought-iron gate, both seven feet high, that shut the place +off from the street, stood in perfect aged strength. The moment they +saw it, the house seemed to say to them, “There's nobody here: come +in!” but the gate and the wall said, “Begone!” + + + +Chapter XIX. + +The blacksmith and his forge. + + +At the end of the wall was a rough boarded fence, in contact with it, +and reaching, some fifty yards or so, to a hovel in which a +blacksmith, of unknown antecedents, had taken possession of a forsaken +forge, and did what odd jobs came in his way. The boys went along the +fence till they came to the forge, where, looking in, they saw the +blacksmith working his bellows. To one with the instincts of Clare's +birth and breeding, he did not look a desirable acquaintance. Tommy +was less fastidious, but he felt that the scowl on the man's brows +boded little friendliness. Clare, however, who hardly knew what fear +was, did not hesitate to go in, for he was drawn as with a cart-rope +by the glow of the fire, and the sparks which, as they gazed, began, +like embodied joys, to fly merrily from the iron. Tommy followed, +keeping Clare well between him and the black-browed man, who rained +his blows on the rosy iron in his pincers, as if he hated it. + +“What do you want, gutter-toads?” he cried, glancing up and seeing +them approach. “This ain't a hotel.” + +“But it's a splendid fire,” rejoined Clare, looking into his face with +a wan smile, “and we're so cold!” + +“What's that to me!” returned the man, who, savage about something, +was ready to quarrel with anything. “I didn't make my fire to warm +little devils that better had never been born!” + +“No, sir,” answered Clare; “but I don't think we'd better not have +been born. We're both cold, and nobody but Tommy knows how hungry I +am; but your fire is so beautiful that, if you would let us stand +beside it a minute or two, we wouldn't at all mind.” + +“Mind, indeed! Mind what, you preaching little humbug?” + +“Mind being born, sir.” + +“Why do you say _sir_ to me? Don't you see I'm a working man?” + +“Yes, and that's why. I think we ought to say _sir_ and _ma'am_ to +every one that can do something we can't. Tommy and I can't make iron +do what we please, and you can, sir! It would be a grand thing for us +if we could!” + +“Oh, yes, a grand thing, no doubt!--Why?” + +“Because then we could get something to eat, and somewhere to lie +down.” + +“Could you? Look at me, now! I can do the work of two men, and can't +get work for half a man!” + +“That's a sad pity!” said Clare. “I wish I had work! Then I would +bring you something to eat.” + +The man did not tell them why he had not work enough--that his +drunkenness, and the bad ways to which it had brought him, with the +fact that he so often dawdled over the work that was given him, caused +people to avoid him. + +“Who said I hadn't enough to eat? I ain't come to that yet, young 'un! +What made you say that?” + +“Because when I had work, I had plenty to eat; and now that I have +nothing to do, I have nothing to eat. It's well I haven't work now, +though,” added Clare with a sigh, “for I'm too tired to do any. Please +may I sit on this heap of ashes?” + +“Sit where you like, so long 's you keep out o' my way. I 'ain't got +nothing to give you but a bar of iron. I'll toast one for you if you +would like a bite.” + +“No, thank you, sir,” answered Clare, with a smile. “I'm afraid it +wouldn't be digestible. They say toasted cheese ain't. I wish I had a +try though!” + +“You're a comical shaver, you are!” said the blacksmith. “You'll come +to the gallows yet, if you're a good boy! Them Sunday-schools is doin' +a heap for the gallows!--That ain't your brother?” + +By this time Tommy had begun to feel at home with the blacksmith, from +whose face the cloud had lifted a little, so that he looked less +dangerous. He had edged nearer to the fire, and now stood in the light +of it. + +“No,” answered Clare, with an odd doubtfulness in his tone. “I ought +to say _yes_, perhaps, for all men are my brothers; but I mean I +haven't any particular one of my very own.” + +“That ain't no pity; he'd ha' been no better than you. I've a brother +I would choke any minute I got a chance.” + +While they talked, the blacksmith had put his iron in the fire, and +again stood blowing the bellows, when his attention was caught by the +gestures of the little red-eyed imp, Tommy, who was making rapid signs +to him, touching his forehead with one finger, nodding mysteriously, +and pointing at Clare with the thumb of his other hand, held close to +his side. He sought to indicate thus that his companion was an +innocent, whom nobody must mind. In the blacksmith Tommy saw one of +his own sort, and the blacksmith saw neither in Tommy nor in Clare any +reason to doubt the hint given him. Not the less was he inclined to +draw out the idiot. + +“Why do you let him follow you about, if he ain't your brother?” he +said. “He ain't nice to look at!” + +“I want to make him nice,” answered Clare, “and then he'll be nice to +look at. You mustn't mind him, please, sir. He's a very little boy, +and 'ain't been well brought up. His granny ain't a good woman--at +least not very, you know, Tommy!” he added apologetically. + +“She's a damned old sinner!” said Tommy stoutly. + +The man laughed. + +“Ha, ha, my chicken! you know a thing or two!” he said, as he took his +iron from the fire, and laid it again on the anvil. + +But besides the brother he would so gladly strangle, there was an +idiot one whom he had loved a little and teazed so much, that, when he +died, his conscience was moved. He felt therefore a little tender +toward the idiot before him. He bethought himself also that his job +would soon be at a stage where the fewer the witnesses the better, for +he was executing a commission for certain burglars of his +acquaintance. He would do no more that night! He had money in his +pocket, and he wanted a drink! + +“Look here, cubs!” he said; “if you 'ain't got nowhere to go to, I +don't mind if you sleep here. There ain't no bed but the bed of the +forge, nor no blankets but this leather apron: you may have them, for +you can't do them no sort of harm. I don't mind neither if you put a +shovelful of slack and a little water now and then on the fire; and if +you give it a blow or two with the bellows now and then, you won't be +stone-dead afore the mornin'!--Don't be too free with the coals, now, +and don't set the shed on fire, and take the bread out of my poor +innocent mouth. Mind what I tell you, and be good boys.” + +“Thank you, sir,” said Clare. “I thought you would be kind to us! I've +one friend, a bull, that's very good to me. So is Jonathan. He's a +horse. The bull's name is Nimrod. He wants to gore always, but he's +never cross with me.” + +The blacksmith burst into a roar of laughter at the idiotic +speech. Then he covered the fire with coal, threw his apron over +Clare's head, and departed, locking the door of the smithy behind him. + +The boys looked at each other. Neither spoke. Tommy turned to the +bellows, and began to blow. + +“Ain't you warm yet?” said Clare, who had seen his mother careful over +the coals. + +“No, I ain't. I want a blaze.” + +“Leave the fire alone. The coal is the smith's, and he told us not to +waste it.” + +“He ain't no count!” said Tommy, as heartless as any grown man or +woman set on pleasure. + +“He has given us a place to be warm and sleep in! It would be a shame +to do anything he didn't like. Have you no conscience, Tommy?” + +“No,” said Tommy, who did not know conscience from copper. The germ of +it no doubt lay in the God-part of him, but it lay deep. Tommy--no +worse than many a boy born of better parents--was like a hill full of +precious stones, that grows nothing but a few little dry shrubs, and +shoots out cold sharp rocks every here and there. + +“If you have no conscience,” answered Clare, “one must serve for +both--as far as it will reach! Leave go of that bellows, or I'll make +you.” + +Tommy let the lever go, turned his back, and wandered, in such dudgeon +as he was capable of, to the other side of the shed. + +“Hello!” he cried, “here's a door!--and it ain't locked, it's only +bolted! Let's go and see!” + +“You may if you like,” answered Clare, “but if you touch anything of +the blacksmith's, I'll be down on you.” + +“All right!” said Tommy, and went out to see if there was anything to +be picked up. + +Clare got on the stone hearth of the forge, and lay down in the hot +ashes, too far gone with hunger to care for the clothes that were +almost beyond caring for. He was soon fast asleep; and warmth and +sleep would do nearly as much for him as food. + + + +Chapter XX. + +Tommy reconnoitres. + + +Tommy, out in the moonlight, found himself in a waste yard, scattered +over with bits of iron, mostly old and rusty. It was not an +interesting place, for it was not likely to afford him anything to +eat. Yet, with the instinct of the human animal, he went shifting and +prying and nosing about everywhere. Presently he heard a curious +sound, which he recognized as made by a hen. More stealthily yet he +went creeping hither and thither, feeling here and feeling there, in +the hope of laying his hand on the fowl asleep. Urged by his natural +impulse to forage, he had forgotten Clare's warning. His hand did find +her, and had it been his grandmother instead of Clare in the smithy, +he would at once have broken the bird's neck before she could cry out; +but with the touch of her feathers came the thought of Clare, and by +this time he understood that what Clare said, Clare would do. + +He had some knowledge of fowls; he had heard too much talk about them +at his grandmother's not to know something of their habits; and +finding she sat so still, he concluded that under her might be +eggs. To his delight it was so. The hen belonged to a house at some +distance, and had wandered from it, in obedience to the secretive +instinct of animal maternity, strong in some hens, to seek a hidden +shelter for her offspring. This she had found in the smith's yard, +beneath the mould-board of a plough that had lain there for +years. Slipping his hand under her, Tommy found five eggs. In greedy +haste he took them, every one. + +I must do him the justice to say that his first impulse was to dart +with them to Clare. But before he had taken a step toward him, again +he remembered his threat. With the eggs inside him, he could run the +risk; he would not mind a few blows--not much; but if he took them to +Clare, the unbearable thing was, that he would assuredly give every +one of them back to the hen. He was an idiot, and Tommy was there to +look after him; but, in looking after Clare, was Tommy to neglect +himself? If Clare would not eat the eggs Tommy carried him, as most +certainly he would not, the best thing was for Tommy to eat them +himself! What a good thing that it was no use to steal for Clare! The +steal would be all for himself! Not a step from the spot did Tommy +move till he had sucked every one of the five eggs. But he made one +mistake: he threw away the shells. + +When he had sucked them, he found himself much lighter-hearted, but, +alas, nearly as hungry as before! The spirit of research began again +to move him: where were eggs, what might there not be beside? + +The moon was nearly at the full; the smith's yard was radiantly +illuminated. But even the moon could lend little enchantment to a +scene where nothing was visible but rusty, broken, deserted, +despairful pieces of old iron. Tommy lifted his eyes and looked +further. + +The enclosure was of small extent, bounded on one side by the garden +wall of the house they had just passed, and at the bottom by a broken +fence, dividing it from a piece of waste land that probably belonged +to the house. As he roamed about, Tommy spied a great heap of old iron +piled up against the wall, and made for it, in the hope of enlarging +his horizon. He scrambled to the top, and looked over. His gaze fell +right into a big but, full of dark water. Twice that evening he met +the same horror! There was a legendary report, though he had not heard +it, I fancy, that his mother drowned herself instead of him: she fell +in, and he was fished out. Whether this was the origin of his fear or +not, so far from getting down by means of the water-but, Tommy dared +not cross at that point. With much trembling he got on the top of the +wall, turned his back on the butt, and ran along like a cat, in search +of a place where he could descend into the garden. He went right to +the end, round the corner, and half-way along the bottom before he +found one. There he came to a doorway that had been solidly walled up +on the outside, while the door was left in position on the +inside--ready for use when the court of chancery should have decided +to whom the house belonged. Its frame was flush with the wall, so that +its bolts and lock afforded Tommy foothold enough to descend, and +confidence of being able to get up again. + +He landed in a moonlit wilderness--such a wilderness as a deserted +garden speedily becomes, the wealth in the soil converting it the +sooner to a savage chaos. Full of the impulse of discovery, and the +hope of presenting himself with importance to Clare as the bringer of +good tidings, Tommy forced his way through or crept under the +overgrown bushes, until he reached a mossy rather than gravelly walk, +where it was more easy to advance. It led him to the house. + +Had he been a boy of any imagination, he would have shuddered at the +thought of attempting an entrance. All the windows had outside +shutters. Those of the ground floor were closed--except one that swung +to and fro, and must have swung in many a wind since the house was +abandoned. The moon shone with a dull whitish gleam on the dusty +windows of the first and second stories, and on the great dormers that +shot out from the slope of the roof, and cast strange shadows upon +it. The door to the garden had had a porch of trellis-work, over which +jasmine and other creeping plants were trained; but whether anything +of the porch was left, no one could have told in that thicket of +creepers, interlaced and matted by antagonist forces of wind and +growth so that not a hint of door was visible. Clearly there was +nobody within. + +Tommy sought the window with the open shutter. Through the dirty +glass, and the reflection of the moon, he could see nothing. He tried +the sash, but could not stir it. He went round the corner to one end +of the house, and saw another door. But an enemy stepped between: the +moon shone suddenly up from the ground. In a hollow of the pavement +had gathered a pool from the drip of the neglected gutters, and out of +its hidden depth the staring round looked at him. It was the third +time Tommy's nerves had been shaken that night, and he could stand no +more. At the awful vision he turned and fled, fell, and rose and fled +again. It was not imagination in Tommy; it was an undefined, +inexplicable horror, that must have had a cause, but could have no +reason. Young as he was he had already more than once looked on the +face of death, and had felt no awe; he had listened to the gruesomest +of tales, told not altogether without art, and had never moved a hair +Only one material and two spiritual things had power with him; the one +material thing was hunger, the two spiritual things were a feeble love +for Clare, and a strong horror of water of any seeming depth. Now a +new element was added to this terror by the meddling of the moon in +the fiendish mystery--the secret of which must, I think, have been the +bottomless depth she gave the water. + +He rushed down the garden. With frightful hindrance from the +overgrowth, he found the prisoned door by strange perversion become a +ladder, gained by it the top of the wall, and sped along as if pursued +by an incarnate dread. Horror of horrors! all at once the moon again +looked up at him from below: he was within a yard or two of the big +water-butt! Right up to it he must go, for, close to it, on the other +side of the wall, was the heap of iron by which alone he could get +down. He tightened every nerve for the effort. He assured himself that +the thing would be over in a moment; that the water was quiet, and +could not follow him; that presently he would find himself in the +smithy by the warm forge-fire. The scaring necessity was, that he must +stoop and kneel right over the water-but, in order to send his legs in +advance down the wall to the top of the mound. It was a moment of +agony. That very moment, with an appalling unearthly cry, something +dark, something hideous, something of inconceivable ghastliness, as it +seemed to Tommy, sprang right out of the water into the air. He +tumbled from the wall among the iron, and there lay. + +The stolen eggs were avenged. The hen, feverish and unhappy from the +loss of her hope of progeny, had gone to the butt to sip a little +water. Tommy, appearing on the wall above her, startled her. She, +flying up with a screech, startled Tommy, and became her own unwitting +avenger. + + + +Chapter XXI. + +Tommy is found and found out. + + +When Clare woke from his first sleep, which he did within an hour--for +he was too hungry to sleep straight on, and the door, imperfectly +closed by Tommy, had come open, and let in a cold wind with the +moonlight--he raised himself on his elbow, and peered from his stone +shelf into the dreary hut. He could not at once tell where he was, but +when he remembered, his first thought was Tommy. He looked about for +him. Tommy was nowhere. Then he saw the open door, and remembered he +had gone out. Surely it was time he had come back! Stiff and sore, he +turned on his longitudinal axis, crept down from the forge, and went +out shivering to look for his imp. The moon shone radiant on the rusty +iron, and the glamour of her light rendered not a few of its shapes +and fragments suggestive of cruel torture. Picking his way among +spikes and corners and edges, he walked about the hideous wilderness +searching for Tommy, afraid to call for fear of attracting attention. +The hen too was walking about, disconsolate, but she took no notice of +him, neither did the sight of her give him any hint or rouse in him +the least suspicion: how could he suspect one so innocent and troubled +for the avenging genius through whom Tommy's white face lay upturned +to the white moon! Her egg-shells lay scattered, each a ghastly point +in the moonshine, each a silent witness to the deed that had been +done. Tommy scattered and forgot them; the moon gathered and noted +them. But they told Clare nothing, either of Tommy's behaviour or of +Tommy himself. + +He came at last to the heap of metal, and there lay Tommy, caught in +its skeleton protrusions. A shiver went through him when he saw the +pallid face, and the dark streak of blood across it. He concluded that +in trying to get over the wall he had failed and fallen back. He +climbed and took him in his arms. Tommy was no weight for Clare, weak +with hunger as he was, to carry to the smithy. He laid him on the +hearth, near the fire, and began to blow it up. The roaring of the +wind in the fire did not wake him. Clare went on blowing. The heat +rose and rose, and brought the boy to himself at last, in no +comfortable condition. He opened his eyes, scrambled to his feet, and +stared wildly around him. + +“Where is it?” he cried. + +“Where's what?” rejoined Clare, leaving the bellows, and taking a hold +of him lest he should fall off. + +“The head that flew out of the water-but,” answered Tommy with a +shudder. + +“Have you lost your senses, Tommy?” remonstrated Clare. “I found you +lying on a heap of old iron against the wall, with the moon shining on +you.” + +“Yes, yes!--the moon! She jumped out of the water-but, and got a hold +of me as I was getting down. I knew she would!” + +“I didn't think you were such a fool, Tommy!” said Clare. + +“Well, you hadn't the pluck to go yourself! You stopt in!” cried +Tommy, putting his hand to his head, but more sorely hurt that an +idiot should call him a fool. + +“Come and let me see, Tommy,” said Clare. + +He wanted to find out if he was much hurt; but Tommy thought he wanted +to go to the water-but, and screamed. + +“Hold your tongue, you little idiot!” cried Clare. “You'll have all +the world coming after us! They'll think I'm murdering you!” + +Tommy restrained himself, and gradually recovering, told Clare what he +had discovered, but not what he had found. + +“There's something yellow on your jacket! What is it?” said Clare. “I +do believe--yes, it is!--you've been eating an egg! Now I remember! I +saw egg-shells, more than two or three, lying in the yard, and the +poor hen walking about looking for her eggs! You little rascal! You +pig of a boy! I won't thrash you this time, because you've fetched +your own thrashing. But--!” + +He finished the sentence by shaking his fist in Tommy's face, and +looking as black at him as he was able. + +“I do believe it was the hen herself that frighted you!” he added. +“She served you right, you thief!” + +“I didn't know there was any harm,” said Tommy, pretending to sob. + +“Why didn't you bring me my share, then?” + +“'Cos I knowed you'd ha' made me give 'em back to the hen!” + +“And you didn't know there was any harm, you lying little brute!” + +“No, I didn't.” + +“Now, look here, Tommy! If you don't mind what I tell you, you and I +part company. One of us two must be master, and I will, or you must +tramp. Do you hear me?” + +“I can't do without wictuals!” whimpered Tommy. “I didn't come wi' +_you_ a purpose to be starved to death!” + +“I dare say you didn't; but when I starve, you must starve too; and +when I eat, you shall have the first mouthful. What did you come with +me for?” + +“'Acos you was the strongest,” answered Tommy, “an' I reckoned you +would get things from coves we met!” + +“Well, I'm not going to get things from coves we meet, except they +give them to me. But have patience, Tommy, and I'll get you all you +can eat. You must give me time, you know! I 'ain't got work yet!--Come +here. Lie down close to me, and we'll go to sleep.” + +The urchin obeyed, pillowed his head on Clare's chest, and went fast +asleep. + +Clare slept too after a while, but the necessities of his relation to +Tommy were fast making a man of him. + + + +Chapter XXII. + +The smith in a rage. + + +They had not slept long, when they were roused by a hideous clamour +and rattling at the door, and thunderous blows on the wooden sides of +the shed. Clare woke first, and rubbed his eyelids, whose hinges were +rusted with sleep. He was utterly perplexed with the uproar and +romage. The cabin seemed enveloped in a hurricane of kicks, and the +air was in a tumult of howling and brawling, of threats and curses, +whose inarticulateness made them sound bestial. There never came pause +long enough for Clare to answer that they were locked in, and that the +smith must have the key in his pocket. But when Tommy came to himself, +which he generally did the instant he woke, but not so quickly this +time because of his fall, he understood at once. + +“It's the blacksmith! He's roaring drunk!” he said. + +“Let's be off, Clare! The devil 'ill be to pay when he gets in! He'll +murder us in our beds!” + +“We ought to let him into his own house if we can,” replied Clare, +rising and going to the door. It was well for him that he found no way +of opening it, for every instant there came a kick against it that +threatened to throw it from lock and hinges at once. He protested his +inability, but the madman thought he was refusing to admit him, and +went into a tenfold fury, calling the boys hideous names, and swearing +he would set the shed on fire if they did not open at once. The boys +shouted, but the man had no sense to listen with, and began such a +furious battery on the door, with his whole person for a ram, that +Tommy made for the rear, and Clare followed--prudent enough, however, +in all his haste, to close the back-door behind them. + +Tommy was in front, and led the way to the bottom of the yard, and +over the fence into the waste ground, hoping to find some point in +that quarter where he could mount the wall. He could not face the +water-but--with the moon in it, staring out of the immensity of the +lower world. He ran and doubled and spied, but could find no +foothold. Least of all was ascent possible at the spot where the door +stood on the other side; the bricks were smoother than elsewhere. He +turned the corner and ran along a narrow lane, Clare still following, +for he thought Tommy knew what he was about; but Tommy could find no +encouragement to attempt scaling the wall. They might have fled into +the fields that lay around; but the burrowing instinct was strong, and +the deserted house drew them. Then Clare, finding Tommy at fault, +bethought him that the little rascal had got up by the heap on which +he discovered him, and must be afraid to go that way again. He faced +about and ran, in his turn become leader. Tommy wheeled also, and +followed, but with misgiving. When they reached the farther corner of +the bottom wall, they stopped and peeped round before they would turn +it: they might run against the blacksmith in chase of them! But the +sound of his continued hammering at the door came to them, and they +went on. They crossed the fence and ran again, ran faster, for now +every step brought them nearer to their danger: the heap of iron lay +between them and the smithy, and any moment the smith might burst into +the shed, rush through, and be out upon them. + +They reached the heap. Clare sprang up; and Tommy, urged on the one +side by the fear of the drunken smith, and drawn on the other by the +dread of being abandoned by Clare, climbed shuddering after him. + +“Mind the water-but, Clare!” he gasped; “an' gi' me a hand up.” + +Clare had already turned on the top of the wall to help him. + +“Now let me go first!” said Tommy, the moment he had his foot on +it. “I know how to get down.” + +He scudded along the wall, glad to have Clare between him and the +butt. Clare followed swiftly. He was not so quick on the cat-promenade +as Tommy, but he had a good head, and was spurred by the apprehension +of being seen up there in the moonlight. + + + +Chapter XXIII. + +Treasure trove. + + +In a few moments they were safe in the thicket at the foot of what had +been their enemy and was now their friend--the garden-wall. How many +things and persons there are whose other sides are altogether +friendly! These are their true selves, and we must be true to get at +them. + +Tommy again took the lead, though with a fresh sinking of the heart +because of that other place with the moon in it. Through the tangled +thicket they made or found their way--and there stood the house, with +the moon looking down on its roof, and the drunkard's thunder +troubling her still pale light--her _moon-thinking_. But for the noise +and the haste, Clare would have been frightened at them. There seemed +some secret between the house and the moon which they were determined +no one else should share. They were of one mind to terrify man or boy +who should attempt to cross the threshold! There was no time, however, +to heed such fancies. “If we could only get in without spoiling +anything!” thought Clare. Once in, they would hurt nothing, take but +the shelter and rest lying there of no good to anybody, and leave them +there all the same when they had done with them! + +While they stood looking at the house, the thundering at the door of +the smithy ceased. Presently they heard voices in altercation. One +voice was that of the smith, quieter than when last they heard it, but +ill-tempered and growling as at first. The other seemed that of a +woman. She had been able so far to quiet him, probably, that he +remembered he had the key in his pocket; for they thought they heard +the door of the smithy open. Then all was silent, and the outcasts +pursued their quest of an entrance to the house. + +Clare went ferreting as Tommy had done. He also tried to get a peep +through the window with the swinging shutter, but had no better +success than Tommy. Then he started to go round the corner next the +blacksmith's yard. + +“Look out!” cried Tommy in a loud whisper, when he saw where he was +going. + +“Why?” asked Clare. + +“Because there's a horrible hole there, full of water,” answered +Tommy. + +“I'll keep a look out,” returned Clare, and went. + +When he was about half-way along the end of the house, he heard a +noise he did not understand, and stopped to listen. Some one seemed +moving somewhere. + +Then came a kind of scrambling sound, and presently the noise of a +great watery splash. Clare shivered from head to foot. + +“Something has fallen into the hole Tommy mentioned!” he said to +himself, and ran on to see. A few steps brought him to what Tommy had +taken for a great hole. It was nothing but a pool of rain-water: the +splash could not have come from that! + +Then it occurred to him that the water-but could not be far off. He +forced his way through shrubs of various kinds, and reaching the wall, +went back along it until he came to the butt. A ray of moonlight showed +him that the side of it was wet, as if the water had lately come over +the edge. He looked about for some means of getting a peep into the +huge thing. It stood on a brick stand, of which it left a narrow edge +clear, but on this edge the bulge of the butt would not permit him to +mount. With the help of a small tree, however, he got on the wall, +which was better. + +Spying into the butt, he could see nothing at first, for a chimney was +now between it and the moon. A moment more, however, and he descried +something white in the dull iron gleam of the water. It was under the +water, but floating near the surface. He lay down on the wall, plunged +his arm into the butt, laid hold of it, and drew it out. It was a +little heavy for the size, for what should it be but a tiny baby, in a +flannel night-gown, which, as he drew it out, sent back little noisy +streams into the butt! It lay perfectly still in his arms, he did not +know whether dead or alive, but he thought it could hardly be drowned +so soon after the splash. It had been drugged, and the antagonism of +the two means employed to kill it was probably the saving of its life. + +Clare stood in stony bewilderment. What was he to do? Certainly not to +go after the mother! The first thing was to get it down from the +wall. That he could easily have done on the other side, by the heap; +but that was the side whence it must have been thrown, and they would +be but in worse difficulty there! He must get the baby down inside the +wall! With at least one arm occupied, the tree-way was impracticable. +There was only one other way, and that full of danger! But where there +is only one way, that way must be taken, and Clare did not hesitate. +He started along the top of the wall, with the poor unconscious germ +of humanity in his arms. He had lifted it from its watery coffin, out +of the cold arms of death, up into the clear air of life! True, that +air was cold, and filled only with moonshine; but there was the house +whose seal might be broken! and the moon saw the sun making warm the +under world! Along the narrow way, through the still, keen glimmer, +unseen, probably, by any eye in the sleeping town, he bore his burden, +speeding as fast as he dared, for he must not set a foot down amiss! + +Had any one caught sight of him, what a commotion would not the tale +have roused--of the spectre of a boy with a baby in his arms, gliding +noiseless in the moon and the middle night, along the top of the high +brick wall of a deserted house, where no one had lived within the +memory of man! + +When he reached the door-ladder, he found descent difficult but +possible. It was more difficult to make his way through the tangled +bushes without scratching the baby, which, after all, might, alas, be +beyond hurt! He held it close to his bosom, life coaxing life to “stay +a little.” + +Thus laden, he appeared before Tommy, who had heard the splash, and +thought Clare had fallen into the deep hole, but had not had courage +to go and see, partly from the fear of verifying his fear, but more +from his horror of the watery abyss. He stood trembling where Clare +had left him. + +To save the baby was now Clare's only thought. The baby was now the +one thing in the universe! If only the light that shone on it were +that of the hot sun instead of the cold moon, which looked far more +like killing than bringing to life! “And,” thought Clare with himself, +“there ain't much more heat in my body than in that shivery moon!” But +the sun would wake and mount the sky, and send the moon down, and all +would be different! Only, if nothing could be done in the meantime, +where would baby be by then! + +“Here, Tommy,” he cried, “come and see what I found in the water-butt.” + +At the word, Tommy turned to flee; but confidence in Clare, and +curiosity to see what, in Clare's arms, could hardly hurt him, +prevailed, and he drew near cautiously. + +“Lord, it's a kid!” he cried. + +“It's not a kid,” said Clare, who had no slang; “it's a baby!” + +“Well! ain't a baby a kid, just?” + +Tommy did not know that the word stood for anything else than a child, +which was indeed its meaning long before it was specially applied to +the young of the goat. A _kidnapper_ or _kidnabber_ is a stealer of +children. Mr. Skeat tells us that _kid_ meant at first just a young +one. + +“You can't tell me what to do with it, I'm afraid, Tommy!” said Clare. + +Already it was as if from all eternity he had loved this helpless +little waif of Time, with its small, thin, blue-gray, gin-drugged +face; this tiny life, so hopeless, so miserable, yet so uncomplaining: +the thing that was, was the thing for it to bear; it had come into the +world to bear it! Ready to die, even Death would not have it; it must +live where it was not wanted, where it was not welcome! + +“Yes, I can!” answered Tommy with evil promptitude. “Put it in again.” + +“But that would drown it, you know, Tommy!” answered Clare, treating +him like the child he was not. “We want it to live, Tommy!” + +His tenderness for the baby made him speak with foolish gentleness. + +“No, we don't!” returned Tommy. “What business has _it_ to live, when +we can't get nothing to eat?” + +Clare held faster to the baby with one arm, and with the fist of the +other struck straight out at Tommy, hit him between the eyes, and +knocked him flat. It was a miserable thing to have to do, and it made +Clare miserable, for Tommy was not half his size, and was still +suffering from his fall on the iron. But then the dying baby was not +half Tommy's size, and any milder argument would have been lost on +him: he was thus sent on the way to understand that the baby had +rights; and that if the baby could not enforce them, there was one in +the world that could and would. Never in his life did Clare show more +instinctive wisdom than in that knock-down blow to the hardly blamable +little devil! + +Tommy got up at once. He was not much hurt, for he had a hard head +though he was easily knocked over. From that moment he began to +respect Clare. He had loved him before in a way; he had patronized +him, and feared to offend him because he was stronger than he; but +until now he had had no respect for him, believing little Tommy a much +finer fellow than big Clare. There are thousands for whom a blow is a +better thing than expostulation, persuasion, or any sort of +kindness. They are such that nothing but a blow will set their door +ajar for love to get in. That is why hardships, troubles, +disappointments, and all kinds of pain and suffering, are sent to so +many of us. We are so full of ourselves, and feel so grand, that we +should never come to know what poor creatures we are, never begin to +do better, but for the knock-down blows that the loving God gives us. +We do not like them, but he does not spare us for that. + + + +Chapter XXIV. + +Justifiable burglary. + + +Tommy rose rubbing his forehead, and crying quietly. He did not dare +say a word. It was well for him he did not. Clare, perplexed and +anxious about the baby, was in no mood to accept annoyance from +Tommy. But the urchin remaining silent, the elder boy's indignation +began immediately to settle down. + +The infant lay motionless, its little heart beating doubtfully, like +the ticking of a clock off the level, as if the last beat might be +indeed the last. + +“We _must_ get into the house, Tommy!” said Clare. + +“Yes, Clare,” answered Tommy, very meekly, and went off like a shot to +renew investigation at the other end of the house. He was back in a +moment, his face as radiant with success as such a face could be, with +such a craving little body under it. + +“Come, come,” he cried. “We can get in quite easy. I ha' _been_ in!” + +The keen-eyed monkey had found a cellar-window, sunk a little below +the level of the ground--a long, narrow, horizontal slip, with a +grating over its small area not fastened down. He had lifted it, and +pushed open the window, which went inward on rusty hinges--so rusty +that they would not quite close again. That he had been in was a +lie. _He_ knew better than go first! He belonged to the school of +_No. 1!_--all mean beggars. + +Clare hastened after him. + +“Gi' me the kid, an' you get in; you can reach up for it better, +'cause ye're taller,” said Tommy. + +“Is it much of a drop?” asked Clare. + +“Nothing much,” answered Tommy. + +Clare handed him the baby, instructing him how to hold it, and +threatening him if he hurt it; then laid himself on his front, shoved +his legs across the area through the window, and followed with his +body. Holding on to the edge of the window-sill, he let his feet as +far down as he could, then dropped, and fell on a heap of coals, +whence he tumbled to the floor of the cellar. + +“You should have told me of the coals!” he said, rising, and calling +up through the darkness. + +“I forgot,” answered Tommy. + +“Give me the baby,” said Clare. + +When Tommy took the baby, he renewed that moment, and began to cherish +the sense of an injury done him by the poor helpless thing. He did not +pinch it, only because he dared not, lest it should cry. When he heard +Clare fall on the coals, and then heard him call up from the depth of +the cellar, he was greatly tempted to turn with it to the other end of +the house, and throw it in the pool, then make for the wall and the +fields, leaving Clare to shift for himself. But he durst not go near +the pool, and Clare would be sure to get out again and be after him! +so he stood with the hated creature in his unprotective arms. When +Clare called for it, he got into the shallow area, and pushed the baby +through the window, grasping the extreme of its garment, and letting +it hang into the darkness of the cellar, head downward. I believe then +the baby was sick, for, a moment after, and before Clare could get a +hold of it, it began to cry. The sound thrilled him with delight. + +“Oh, the darling!--Can't you let her down a bit farther, Tommy?” he +said, with suppressed eagerness. + +He had climbed on the heap of coals, and was stretching up his arms to +receive her. In the faint glimmer from the diffused light of the moon, +he could just distinguish the window, blocked up by Tommy; the baby he +could not see. + +“No, I can't,” answered Tommy. “Catch! There!” + +So saying he yielded to his spite, and waiting no sign of preparedness +on the part of Clare, let go his hold, and dropped the little one. It +fell on Clare and knocked him over; but he clasped it to him as he +fell, and they hurtled to the bottom of the coals without much damage. + +“I have her!” he cried as he got up. “Now you come yourself, Tommy.” + +He had known no baby but his lost sister, and thought of all babies as +girls. + +“You'll catch me, won't you, Clare?” said Tommy. + +“The thing you've done once you can do again! I can't set down the +baby to catch you!” replied the unsuspicious Clare, and turned to seek +an exit from the cellar. He had not had time yet to wonder how Tommy +had got out. + +Tommy came tumbling on the top of the coals: he dared not be left with +the water-but and the pool and the moon. + +“Where are you, Clare?” he called. + +Clare answered him from the top of the stone stair that led to the +cellar, and Tommy was soon at his heels. Going along a dark passage, +where they had to feel their way, they arrived at the kitchen. The +loose outside shutter belonged to it, and as it was open, a little of +the moonlight came in. The place looked dreary enough and cold enough +with its damp brick-floor and its rusty range; but at least they were +out of the air, and out of sight of the moon! If only they had some of +that coal alight! + +“I don't see as we're much better off!” said Tommy. “I'm as cold as +pigs' trotters!” + +“Then what must baby be like!” said Clare, whose heart was brimful of +anxiety for his charge. It seemed to him he had never known misery +till now. Life or death for the baby--and he could do nothing! He was +cold enough himself, what with hunger, and the night, and the wet and +deadly cold little body in his arms; but whatever discomfort he felt, +it seemed not himself but the baby that was feeling it; he imputed it +all to the baby, and pitied the baby for the cold he felt himself. + +“We needn't stay here, though,” he said. “There must be better places +in the house! Let's try and find a bedroom!” + +“Come along!” responded Tommy. + +They left the kitchen, and went into the next room. It seemed warmer, +because it had a wooden floor. There was hardly any light in it, but +it felt empty. They went up the stair. When they turned on the landing +half-way, they saw the moon shining in. They went into the first room +they came to. Such a bedroom!--larger and grander than any at the +parsonage! + +“Oh baby! baby!” cried Clare, “now you'll live--won't you?” + +He seemed to have his own Maly an infant again in his arms. The +thought that the place was not his, and that he might get into trouble +by being there, never came to him. Use was not theft! The room and its +contents were to him as the water and the fire which even pagans +counted every man bound to hand to his neighbour. There was the bed! +Through all the cold time it had been waiting for them! The +counterpane was very dusty; and oh, such moth-eaten blankets! But +there were sheets under them, and they were quite clean, though dingy +with age! The moths--that is, their legs and wings and dried-up +bodies--flew out in clouds when they moved the blankets. Not the less +had they discovered Paradise! For the moths, they must have found it +an island of plum-cake! + +I do not know the history of the house--how it came to be shut up with +so much in it. I only know it was itself shut up in chancery, and +chancery is full of moths and dust and worms. I believe nobody in the +town knew much about it--not even the thieves. It was of course said +to be haunted, which had doubtless done something for its +protection. No one knew how long it had stood thus deserted. Nobody +thought of entering it, or was aware that there was furniture in +it. It was supposed to be somebody's property, and that it was +somebody's business to look after it: whether it was looked after or +not, nobody inquired. Happily for Clare and the baby and Tommy, that +was nobody's business. + +With deft hands--for how often had he not seen his baby-sister +undressed!--Clare hurried off the infant's one garment, gently rubbed +her little body till it was quite dry, if not very clean, and laid her +tenderly in the heart of the blankets, among the remains and eggs and +grubs of the mothy creatures--they were not wild beasts, or even +stinging things--and covered her up, leaving a little opening for her +to breathe through. She had not cried since Clare took her; she was +too feeble to cry; but, alas, there was no question about feeding her, +for he had no food to give her, were she crying ever so much! He threw +off his clothes, and got into the mothy blankets beside her. In a few +minutes he began to glow, for there was a thick pile of woolly +salvation atop of him. He took the naked baby in his arms and held her +close to his body, and they grew warmer together. + +“Now, Tommy,” he said, “you may take off your clothes, and get in on +the other side of me.” + +Tommy did not need a second invitation, and in a moment they were all +fast asleep. A few months, even a few days before, it would have been +a right painful thing to Clare to lie so near a boy like Tommy, but +suffering had taken the edge off nicety and put it on humanity. The +temple of the Lord may need cleansing, but the temple of the Lord it +is. Clare had in him that same spirit which made _the_ son of man go +beyond the healingly needful, and lay his hand--the Sinaitic +manuscript says his _hands_--upon the leper, where a word alone would +have served for the leprosy: the hands were for the man's +heart. Repulsive danger lay in the contact, but the flesh and bones +were human, and very cold. + + + +Chapter XXV. + +A new quest. + + +Though as comfortable as one could be who so sorely lacked food, Clare +slept lightly. His baby was heavy on his mind, and he woke very +early--woke at once to the anxious thought of a boy without food, +money, or friends, and with a hungry baby. He woke, however, with a +new train of reasoning in his mind. Babies could not work; babies +always had their food given them; therefore babies who hadn't food had +a right to ask for it; babies couldn't ask for it; therefore those who +had the charge of them, and hadn't food to give them, had a right to +do the asking for them. He could not beg for himself as long as he was +able to ask for work; but for baby it was his duty to beg, because she +could not wait: she would not live till he found work. If he got work +that very day, he would have to work the whole day before he got the +money for it, and baby would be dead by that time! He crept out, so as +not to awake the sleepers, and put on his clothes. They were not dry, +but they would dry when the sun rose. He did not at all like leaving +his baby with Tommy, but what was he to do? She might as well die of +Tommy as of hunger! Perhaps it might be easier! + +He thought over the nature of the boy, and what it would be best to +say to him. He saw what many genial persons are slow to see, that +kindness, in its natural shape, is to certain dispositions a great +barrier in the way of learning either love or duty. With multitudes, +nothing but undiluted fear or pain or shame can open the door for love +to enter. + +He searched the house for a medicine-bottle, such as he had seen +plenty of at the parsonage, and found two. He chose the smaller, lest +size should provoke disinclination. Then he woke Tommy, and said to +him, + +“Tommy, I'm going out to get baby's breakfast.” + +“Ain't you going to give _me_ any? Is the kid to have _everything_?” + +“Tommy!” said Clare, with a steady look in his eyes that frightened +him, “your turn will come next. You won't die of want for a day or two +yet. I'll see to you as soon as I can. Only, remember, baby comes +first! I'm going to leave her with you. You needn't take her up. +You're not able to carry her. You would let her fall. But if, when I +come home, I find anything has happened to her, _I'll put you in the +water-butt_--I WILL. And I'll do it when the moon is in it.” + +Tommy pulled a hideous face, and began to yell. Clare seized him by +the throat. + +“Make that noise again, you rascal, and I'll choke you. If you're good +to baby while I'm away, I won't eat a mouthful till you've had some; +if you're not good to her, you know what will happen! You've got the +thing in your own hands!” + +“She'll go an' do something I can't help, an' then you'll go for to +drown me!” + +Again he began to howl, but Clare checked him as before. “If you wake +her up, I'll--” He had no words, and shook him for lack of any. “I +see,” he resumed, “I shall have to lock you up in the coal-cellar till +I come back! Here! come along!” + +Tommy was quiet instantly, and fell to pleading. Clare lent a gracious +ear, and yielding to Tommy's protestations, left him with his +treasure, and set out on his quest. + +He got out through the kitchen, the rustiness of the fastenings of its +door delaying him a little, and over the wall by the imprisoned door, +taking care to lift as little as possible of his person above the +coping as he crossed. He dared not go along the wall in the daylight, +or get down in the smith's yard; he dropped straight to the ground. + +The country was level, and casting his eyes about, he saw, at no great +distance, what looked like a farmstead. He knew cows were milked +early, but did not know what time it was. Hoping anyhow to reach the +place before the milk was put away in the pans, he set out to run +straight across the fields. But he soon found he could not run, and +had to drop into a walk. + +When he got into the yard, he saw a young woman carrying a foaming +pail of milk across to the dairy. He ran to her, and addressed her +with his usual “Please, ma'am;” but the pail was heavy, and she kept +on without answering him. Clare followed her, and looking into the +dairy, saw an elderly woman. + +“Please, ma'am, could you afford me as much fresh milk as would fill +that bottle?” he said, showing it. + +“Well, my man,” she answered pleasantly, “I think we might venture as +far without fear of the workhouse! But what on earth made you bring +such a thimble of a bottle as that?” + +“I have no money to pay for it, you see, ma'am; and I thought a little +bottle would be better to beg with; it wouldn't be so hard on the +farmer!” + +“Bless the boy! Much good a drop of milk like that will do him!” said +the woman, turning to the girl “Is it for your mother's tea?” + +“No, ma'am; it's for a baby--a very little baby, ma'am!--I think it +will hold enough,” he added, giving an anxious glance at the bottle in +his hand, “to keep her alive till I get work.” + +The woman looked, and her heart was drawn to the boy who stood gazing +at her with his whole solemn, pathetic yet strong face--with his wide, +clear eyes, his decided nose, large and straight, his rather long, +fine mouth, trembling with eager anxiety, and his confident chin. She +saw hunger in his grimy cheeks; she saw that his manners were those of +a gentleman, and his clothes poor enough for any tramp, though +evidently not made for a tramp. She would have concluded him escaped +from cruel guardians, for she was a reader of _The Family Herald_; but +that would not account for the baby! The baby did not tally! + +“How old's the baby?” she asked. + +“I don't know, ma'am; she only came to us last night.” + +“Who brought her?” + +She imagined the boy a simpleton, and expected one of such answers as +inconvenient questions in natural history receive from nurses. + +“I don't know, ma'am. I took her out of the water-butt.” + +The thing grew bewildering. + +“Who put her there?” + +“I don't know, ma'am.” + +“Whose baby is she, then?” + +“Mine, I think, ma'am.” + +“God bless the boy!” said the woman impatiently, and stared at him +speechless. + +Her daughter in the meantime had filled the phial with new milk. She +handed it to him. He grasped it eagerly. Tears of joy came in his big +hungry eyes. + +“Oh, _thank_ you, ma'am!” he said. “But, please, would you tell me,” + he continued, looking from the one to the other, “how much water I +must put in the milk to make it good for baby? I know it wants water, +but I don't know how much!” + +“Oh, about half and half,” answered the elder woman. “'Ain't she got +no mother?” she resumed. + +“I think she must have a mother, but I daresay she's a tramp,” + answered Clare. + +“I don't want to give my good milk to a tramp!” she rejoined. + +“_I_'m not a tramp, please, ma'am!--at least I wasn't till the day +before yesterday.” + +The woman looked at him out of motherly eyes, and her heart swelled +into her bosom. + +“Wouldn't you like some milk yourself?” she said. + +“Oh, yes, ma'am!” answered Clare, with a deep sigh. + +She filled a big cup from the warm milk in the pail, and held it out +to him. He took it as a man on the scaffold might a reprieve from +death, half lifted it to his lips, then let his hand sink. It trembled +so, as he set the cup down on a shelf beside him, that he spilled a +little. He looked ruefully at the drops on the brick floor. + +“Please, ma'am, there's Tommy!” he faltered. + +His promise to Tommy had sprung upon him like a fiery flying serpent. + +“Tommy! I thought you said the baby was a girl?” + +“Yes, the baby's a girl; but there's Tommy as well! He's another of +us.” + +“Your brother, of course!” + +“No, ma'am; I'm afraid he's a tramp. But there he is, you see, and I +must share with him!” + +It grew more and more inexplicable! + +A gruff, loud voice came from the yard. It was the farmer's. He was a +bitter-tempered man, and his dislike of tramps was almost hatred. His +wife and daughter knew that if he saw the boy he would be worse than +rude to him. + +“There's the master!” cried the mother. “Drink, and make haste out of +his way.” + +“If it's stealing,--” said Clare. + +“Stealing! It's no stealing! The dairy's mine! I can give my milk +where I please!” + +“Well, ma'am, if the milk's mine because you gave it me, it's not +begging to ask you to give me a piece of bread for it! I could take a +share of that to Tommy!” + +“Run, Chris,” cried the mother, hurriedly; “take the innocent with +you--round outside the yard. Give him a hunch of bread, and let him +go. For God's sake don't let your father see him! Run, my boy, run! +There's no time to drink the milk now!” + +She poured it back into the pail, and set the cup out of the way. + +There was a little passage and another door, by which they left as the +farmer entered. The kick he would have given Clare with his heavy boot +would, in its consequences, have reached the baby too. The girl ran +with him to the back of the house. + +“Wait a moment at that window,” she said. + +Now whether it was loving-kindness all, or that she dared not take the +time to divide it, I cannot tell, but she handed Clare a whole loaf, +and that a good big one, of home-made bread, and disappeared before he +could thank her, telling him to run for his life. + +He was able now. With the farmer behind, and the hungry ones before +him, he _must_ run; and with the phial in his pocket and the loaf in +his hands, he _could_ run. Happily the farmer did not catch sight of +him. His wife took care he should not. I believe, indeed, she got up a +brand-new quarrel with him on the spur of the moment, that he might +not have a chance. + + + +Chapter XXVI. + +A new entrance. + + +Clare sped jubilant. But soon came a check to his jubilation: it was +one thing to drop from the wall, and quite another to climb to the top +of it without the help of the door! The same moment he heard the clink +of the smith's hammer on his anvil, and to go by his yard in daylight +would be to risk too much! For what would become of them if their +retreat was discovered! He stood at the foot of the brick precipice, +and stared up with helpless eyes and failing strength. Baby was +inside, hungry, and with no better nurse than ill conditioned Tommy; +her milk was in his pocket, Tommy's bread in his hand, the +insurmountable wall between him and them! He had the daylight now, +however, and there was hardly any one about: perhaps he could find +another entrance! Round the outside of the wall, therefore, like the +Midianite in the rather comical hymn, did Clare prowl and prowl. But +the wall rose straight and much too smooth wherever he looked. +Searching its face he went all along the bottom of the garden, and +then up the narrow lane between it and the garden of the next house, +with increasing fear that there was no way but by the smith's yard, +and no choice but risk it. + +A dozen yards or so, however, from the end of the lane, where it took +a sharp turn before entering the street, he spied an opening in the +wall--the same from which, the night before, Tommy had returned with +such a frightened face. Clare went through, and found a narrow passage +running to the left for a short distance between two walls. At the +end, half on one side, half on the other of the second wall, lay the +well that had terrified Tommy. The wall crossed it with a low arch. On +the further side of the well was a third wall, with a space of about +two feet and a half between it and the side of the round well. Through +that wall there might be a door!--or, if not, there might be some way +of getting over it! To cross the well would be awkward, but he must do +it! He tied the loaf in his pocket-handkerchief--he was far past +fastidiousness, and Tommy knew neither the word nor the thing--and +knotted the ends of it round his neck. But his chief anxiety was not +to break the bottle in his jacket-pocket. He got on his knees on the +parapet. How deep and dark the water looked! For a moment he felt a +fear of it something like Tommy's. How was he to cross the awful gulf? +It was not like a free jump; he was hemmed in before and behind, and +overhead also. But the baby drew him over the well, as the name of +Beatrice drew Dante through the fire. The baby was waiting for him, +and it had to be done! He made a cat-leap through beneath the arch, +reaching out with his hands and catching at the parapet beyond. He did +catch it, just enough of it to hold on by, so that his body did not +follow his legs into the water. Oh, how cold they found it after his +run! He held on, strained and heaved up, made a great reach across the +width of the parapet with one hand, laid hold of its outer edge, made +good his grasp on it, and drew himself out of the water, and out of +the well. + +He was in a narrow space, closed in with walls much higher than his +head, out of which he saw no way but that by which he had come +in--across the fearful well, that seemed, so dark was its water, to go +down and down for ever. + +He felt in his pocket. If then he had found baby's bottle broken, I +doubt if Clare would ever have got out of the place, except by the +door into the next world. What little strength he had was nearly gone, +and I think it would then have gone quite. But the bottle was safe and +his courage came back. + +He examined his position, and presently saw that the narrowness of his +threatened prison would make it no prison at all. He found that, by +leaning his back against one wall, pushing his feet against the +opposite wall, and making of the third wall a rack for his shoulder, +he could worm himself slowly up. It was a task for a strong man, and +Clare, though strong for his years, was not at that moment strong. But +there was the baby waiting, and here was her milk! He fell to, and, +with an agony of exertion, wriggled himself at last to the top--so +exhausted that he all but fell over on the other side. He pulled +himself together, and dropped at once into, the garden. Happier boy +than Clare was not in all England then. Hunger, wet, incipient +nakedness, for he had torn his clothes badly, were nowhere. Baby was +within his reach, and the milk within baby's! + +He ran, dripping like a spaniel, to find her, and shot up the stair to +the room that held his treasure. To his joy he found both Tommy and +the baby fast asleep, Tommy tired out with the weary tramping of the +day before, and the baby still under the influence of the opiate her +mother had given her to make her drown quietly. + + + +Chapter XXVII. + +The baby has her breakfast. + + +He waked Tommy, and showed him the loaf. Tommy sprang from his lair +and snatched at it. + +“No, Tommy,” said Clare, drawing back, “I can't trust you! You would +eat it all; and if I died of hunger, what would become of baby, left +alone with you? I don't feel at all sure you wouldn't eat _her_!” + +Baby started a feeble whimper. + +“You must wait now till I've attended to her,” continued Clare. “If +you had got up quietly without waking her, I would have given you your +share at once.” + +As he spoke, he pulled a blanket off the bed to wrap her in, and made +haste to take her up. A series of difficulties followed, which I will +leave to the imagination of mothers and aunts, and nurses in +general--the worst being that there was no warm water to wash her in, +and cold water would be worse than dangerous after what she had gone +through with it the night before. Clare comforted himself that washing +was a thing non-essential to existence, however desirable for +well-being. + +Then came a more serious difficulty: the milk must be mixed with +water, and water as cold as Clare's legs would kill the drug-dazed +shred of humanity! What was to be done? It would be equally dangerous +to give her the strong milk of a cow undiluted. There was but one way: +he must feed her as do the pigeons. First, however, he must have +water! The well was almost inaccessible: to get to it and return would +fearfully waste life-precious time! The rain-water in the little pool +must serve the necessity! It was preferable to that in the butt! + +Until many years after, it did not occur to Clare as strange that +there should be even a drop of water in that water-butt. Whence was it +fed? There was no roof near, from which the rain might run into it. If +there had ever been a pipe to supply it, surely, in a house so long +forsaken, its continuity must have given way One always sees such +barrels empty, dry, and cracked: this one was apparently known to be +full of water, for what woman in her senses, however inferior those +senses, would throw her child into an empty butt! How did it happen to +be full? Clare was almost driven to the conclusion that it had been +filled for the evil purpose to which it was that night put. Against +this was the fact that it would not have been easy to fill such a huge +vessel by hand. I suggested that the blacksmith and his predecessors +might have used it for the purposes of the forge, and kept it and its +feeder in repair. Mr. Skymer endeavoured repeatedly to find out what +had become of the blacksmith, but never with any approach to success; +the probability being that he had left the world long before his +natural time, by disease engendered or quarrel occasioned through his +drunkenness. + +Clare laid the baby down, and fetched water from the pool. Then he +mixed the milk with what seemed the right quantity, again took the +baby up, who had been whimpering a little now and then all the time, +laid a blanket, several times folded, on his wet knees, and laid her +in her blanket upon it. These preparations made, he took a small +mouthful of the milk and water, and held it until it grew warm. It was +the only way, I condescend to remind any such reader as may think it +proper to be disgusted. When then he put his mouth to the baby's, +careful not to let too much go at once, they managed so between them +that she successfully appropriated the mouthful. It was followed by a +second, a third, and more, until, to Clare's delight, the child seemed +satisfied, leaving some of the precious fluid for another meal. He put +her in the bed again, and covered her up warm. All the time, Tommy had +been watching the loaf with the eyes of a wild beast. + +“Now, Tommy,” said Clare, “how much of this loaf do you think you +ought to have?” + +“Half, of course!” answered Tommy boldly, with perfect conviction of +his fairness, and pride in the same. + +“Are you as big as I am?” + +Tommy held his peace. + +“You ain't half as big!” said Clare. + +“I'm a bloomin' lot hungrier!” growled Tommy. + +“You had eggs last night, and I had none!” + +“That wurn't my fault!” + +“What did you do to get this bread?” + +“I staid at home with baby.” + +“That's true,” answered Clare. “But,” he went on, “suppose a horse and +a pony had got to divide their food between them, would the pony have +a right to half? Wouldn't the horse, being bigger, want more to keep +him alive than the pony?” + +“Don't know,” said Tommy. + +“But you shall have the half,” continued Clare; “only I hope, after +this, when you get anything given to you, you'll divide it with me. I +try to be fair, and I want you to be fair.” + +Tommy made no reply. He did not trouble himself about fair play; he +wanted all he could get--like most people; though, thank God, I know a +few far more anxious to give than to receive fair play. Such men, be +they noblemen or tradesmen, I worship. + +Clare carefully divided the loaf, and after due deliberation, handed +Tommy that which seemed the bigger half. Without a word of +acknowledgment, Tommy fell upon it like a terrier. He would love Clare +in a little while when he had something more to give--but stomach +before heart with Tommy! His sort is well represented in every +rank. There are not many who can at the same time both love and be +hungry. + + + +Chapter XXVIII. + +Treachery. + + +“Now, Tommy,” said Clare, having eaten his half loaf, “I'm going out +to look for work, and you must take care of baby. You're not to feed +her--you would only choke her, and waste the good milk.” + +“I want to go out too,” said Tommy. + +“To see what you can pick up, I suppose?” + +“That's my business.” + +“I fancy it mine while you are with me. If you don't take care of baby +and be good to her, I'll put you in the water-butt I took her out +of--as sure as you ain't in it now!” + +“That you shan't!” cried Tommy; “I'll bite first!” + +“I'll tie your hands and feet, and put a stick in your mouth,” said +Clare. “So you'd better mind.” + +“I want to go with you!” whimpered Tommy. + +“You can't. You're to stop and look after baby. I won't be away longer +than I can help; you may be sure of that.” + +With repeated injunctions to him not to leave the room, Clare went. + +Before going quite, however, he must arrange for returning. To swarm +up between the two walls as he had done before, would be to bid +good-bye to his jacket at least, and he knew how appearances were +already against him. Spying about for whatever might serve his +purpose, he caught sight of an old garden-roller, and was making for +it, when Tommy, never doubting he was gone, came whistling round the +corner of the house with his hands in his pocket-holes, and an +impudent air of independence. Clare away, he was a lord in his own +eyes! He could kill the baby when he pleased! Plainly his mood was, +“He thinks I'm going to do as he tells me! Not if I knows it!” Clare +saw him before he saw Clare, and rushed at him with a roar. + +“You thought I was gone!” he cried. “I told you not to leave the room! +Come along to the water-butt!” + +Tommy shivered when he heard him, and gave a shriek when he saw him +coming. He shook till his teeth chattered. But terror not always +paralyzes instinct in the wild animal. As Clare came running, he took +one step toward him, and dropped on the ground at his feet. Clare shot +away over his head, struck his own against a tree, and lay for a +minute stunned. Tommy's success was greater than he had hoped. He +scudded into the house, and closed and bolted the door to the kitchen. + +When Clare came to himself, he found he had a cut on his head. It +would never do to go asking for work with a bloody face! The little +pool served at once for basin and mirror, and while he washed he +thought. + +He had no inclination to punish Tommy for the trick he had played him; +he had but done after his kind! It would serve a good end too: Tommy +would imagine him lurking about to have his revenge, and would not +venture his nose out. He discovered afterward that the little wretch +had made fast the cellar-door, so that, if he had entered that way, he +would have been caught in a trap, and unable to go or return. + +He got the iron roller to the foot of the wall, where he had come over +the night before, and where now first he perceived there had once been +a door; managed, with its broken handle for a lever, to set it up on +end, filled it with earth, and heaped a mound of earth about it to +steady it, placed a few broken tiles and sherds of chimney-pots upon +it, and from this rickety perch found he could reach the top easily. + +The next thing was to arrange for getting up from the other side. For +this he threw over earth and stones and whatever rubbish came to his +hand, the sole quality required in his material being, that it should +serve to lift him any fraction of an inch higher. The space was so +narrow that his mound did not require to be sustained by the width of +its base except in one direction; everywhere else the walls kept in +the heap, and he made good speed. At length he descended by it, sure +of being able to get up again. + +He had been gone an hour before Tommy dared again leave the room where +the baby was. He had planned what to do if Clare got into it: he would +threaten, if he came a step nearer, to kill the baby! But if he had +him in the coal-cellar, he would make his own conditions! A tramp +would not keep a promise, but Clare would! and until he promised not +to touch him, he should not come out--not if he died of hunger! + +At length he could bear imprisonment no longer. He opened the +room-door with the caution of one who thought a tiger might be lying +against it. He saw no one, and crept out with half steps. By slow +degrees, interrupted by many an inroad of terror and many a swift +retreat, he got down the stair and out into the garden; whence, after +closest search, he was at length satisfied his enemy had departed. For +a time he was his own master! To one like Tommy--and such are not +rare--it is a fine thing to be his own master. But the same person who +is the master is the servant--and what a master to serve! Tommy, +however, was quite satisfied with both master and servant, for both +were himself. What was he to do? Go after something to eat, of course! +He would be back long before Clare! He had gone to look for work--and +who would give _him_ work? If Tommy were as big as Clare, lots of +people would give him work! But catch him working! Not if he knew +it!--not Tommy! + +Never till she was grown up, never, indeed, until she was a +middle-aged woman and Mr. Skymer's housekeeper, did the baby know in +what danger she was that morning, alone with surnameless Tommy. + +His first sense of relation to any creature too weak to protect +itself, was the consciousness of power to torment that creature. But +in this case the exercise of the power brought him into another +relation, one with the water-butt! He went back to the room where the +child lay in her blankets like a human chrysalis, and stood for a +moment regarding her with a hatred far from mild: was he actually +expected to give time and personal notice to that contemptible thing +lying there unable to move? _He_ wasn't a girl or an old woman! He +must go and get something to eat! that was what a man was for! Better +twist her neck at once and go! + +But he could not forget the water-butt--proximate mother of the +child. Its idea came sliding into Tommy's range, grew and grew upon +Tommy, came nearer and nearer, until the baby was nowhere, and nothing +in the world but the water-butt. His consciousness was possessed with +it. It was preparing to swallow him in its loathsome deep! All at once +it jumped back from him, and stood motionless by the side of the +wall. Now was his chance! Now he must mizzle! Not a moment longer +would he stop in the same place with the horrible thing! + +But the baby! Clare would bring him back and put him in the butt! No, +he wouldn't! What harm would come to the brat? She was not able to +roll herself off the bed! She could do nothing but go to sleep again! +Out he must and would go! He wanted something to eat! He would be in +again long before Clare could get back! + +He left the room and the house, ran down the garden, scrambled up the +door, got on the top of the wall, and dropped into the waste land +behind it--nor once thought that the only way back was by the very +jaws of the water-butt. + + + +Chapter XXIX. + +The baker. + + +Clare went over the wall and the well without a notion of what he was +going to do, except look for work. He had eaten half a loaf, and now +drew in his cap some water from the well and drank. He felt better +than any moment since leaving the farm. He was full of hope. + +All his life he had never been other than hopeful. To the human being +hope is as natural as hunger; yet how few there are that hope as they +hunger! Men are so proud of being small, that one wonders to what +pitch their conceit will have arrived by the time they are nothing at +all. They are proud that they love but a little, believe less, and +hope for nothing. Every fool prides himself on not being such a fool +as believe what would make a man of him. For dread of being taken in, +he takes himself in ridiculously. The man who keeps on trying to do +his duty, finds a brighter and brighter gleam issue, as he walks, from +the lantern of his hope. + +Clare was just breaking into a song he had heard his mother sing to +his sister, when he was checked by the sight of a long skinny mongrel +like a hairy worm, that lay cowering and shivering beside a heap of +ashes put down for the dust-cart--such a dry hopeless heap that the +famished little dog did not care to search it: some little warmth in +it, I presume, had kept him near it. Clare's own indigence made him +the more sorry for the indigent, and he felt very sorry for this +member of the family; but he had neither work nor alms to give him, +therefore strode on. The dog looked wistfully after him, as if +recognizing one of his own sort, one that would help him if he could, +but did not follow him. + +A hundred yards further, Clare came to a baker's shop. It was the +first he felt inclined to enter, and he went in. He did not know it +was the shop from whose cart Tommy had pilfered. A thin-faced, +bilious-looking, elderly man stood behind the counter. + +“Well, boy, what do you want?” he said in a low, sad, severe, but not +unkindly voice. + +“Please, sir,” answered Clare, “I want something to do, and I thought +perhaps you could help me.” + +“What can you do?” + +“Not much, but I can _try_ to do anything.” + +“Have you ever learned to do anything?” + +“I've been working on a farm for the last six months. Before that I +went to school.” + +“Why didn't you go on going to school?” + +“Because my father and mother died.” + +“What was your father?” + +“A parson.” + +“Why did you leave the farm?” + +“Because they didn't want me. The mistress didn't like me.” + +“I dare say she had her reasons!” + +“I don't know, sir; she didn't seem to like anything I did. My mother +used to say, 'Well done, Clare!' my mistress never said 'Well done!”' + +“So the farmer sent you away?” + +“No, sir; but he boxed my ears for something--I don't now remember +what.” + +“I dare say you deserved it!” + +“Perhaps I did; I don't know; he never did it before.” + +“If you deserved it, you had no right to run away for that.” + +The baker taught in a Sunday-school, and was a good teacher, able to +make a class mind him. + +“I didn't run away for that, sir; I ran away because he was tired of +me. I couldn't stay to make him uncomfortable! He had been very kind +to me; I fancy it was mistress made him change. I've been thinking a +good deal about it, and that's how it looks to me. I'm very sorry not +to have him or the creatures any more.” + +“What creatures?” + +“The bull, and the horses, and the cows, and the pigs--all the +creatures about the farm. They were my friends. I shall see them all +again somewhere!” + +He gave a great sigh. + +“What do you mean by that?” asked the baker. + +“I hardly know what I mean,” answered Clare. + +“When I'm loving anybody I always feel I shall see that person again +some time, I don't know when--somewhere, I don't know where.” + +“That don't apply to the lower animals; it's nothing but a foolish +imagination,” said the baker. + +“But if I love them!” suggested Clare. + +“Love a bull, or a horse, or a pig! You can't!” asserted the baker. + +“But I _do_,” rejoined Clare. “I love my father and mother much more +than when they were alive!” + +“What has that to do with it?” returned the baker. + +“That I know I love my father and mother, and I know I love that +fierce bull that would always do what I told him, and that dear old +horse that was almost past work, and was always ready to do his +best.--I'm afraid they've killed him by now!” he added, with another +sigh. + +“But beasts 'ain't got souls, and you can't love them. And if you +could, that's no reason why you should see them again.” + +“I _do_ love them, and perhaps they have souls!” rejoined Clare. + +“You mustn't believe that! It's quite shocking. It's nowhere in the +Bible.” + +“Is everything that is not in the Bible shocking, sir?” + +“Well, I won't say that; but you're not to believe it.” + +“I suppose you don't like animals, sir! Are you afraid of their going +to the same place as you when they die?” + +“I wouldn't have a boy about me that held such an unscriptural notion! +The Bible says--the spirit of a man that goeth upward, and the spirit +of a beast that goeth downward!” + +“Is that in the Bible, sir?” + +“It is,” answered the baker with satisfaction, thinking he had proved +his point. + +“I'm so glad!” returned Clare. “I didn't know there was anything about +it in the Bible! Then when I die I shall only have to go down +somewhere, and look for them till I find them!” + +The baker was silenced for a moment. + +“It's flat atheism!” he cried. “Get out of my shop! What is the world +coming to!” + +Clare turned and went out. + +But though a bilious, the baker was not an unreasonable or unjust man +except when what he had been used to believe all his life was +contradicted. Clare had not yet shut the door when he repented. He was +a good man, though not quite in the secret of the universe. He vaulted +over the counter, and opened the door with such a ringing of its +appended bell as made heavy-hearted Clare turn before he heard his +voice. The long spare white figure appeared on the threshold, framed +in the doorway. + +“Hi!” it shouted. + +Clare went meekly back. + +“I've just remembered hearing--but mind I _know_ nothing, and pledge +myself to nothing----” + +He paused. + +“I didn't say I was _sure_ about it,” returned Clare, thinking he +referred to the fate of the animals, “but I fear I'm to blame for not +being sure.” + +“Come, come!” said the baker, with a twist of his mouth that expressed +disgust, “hold your tongue, and listen to me.--I did hear, as I was +saying, that Mr. Maidstone, down the town, had one of his errand-boys +laid up with scarlet fever. I'll take you to him, if you like. Perhaps +he'll have you,--though I can't say you look respectable!” + +“I 'ain't had much chance since I left home, sir. I had a bit of soap, +but----” + +He bethought him that he had better say nothing about his +family. Tommy had picked his pocket of the soap the night before, and +tried to eat it, and Clare had hidden it away: he wanted it to wash +the baby with as soon as he could get some warm water; but when he +went to find it to wash his own face, it was gone. He suspected Tommy, +but before long he had terrible ground for a different surmise. + +“You see, sir,” he resumed, “I had other things to think of. When your +tummy's empty, you don't think about the rest of you--do you, sir?” + +The baker could not remember having ever been more than decently, +healthily hungry in his life; and here he had been rough on a +well-bred boy too hungry to wash his face! Perhaps the word _one of +these little ones_ came to him. He had some regard for him who spoke +it, though he did talk more about him on Sundays than obey him in the +days between. + +“I don't know, my boy,” he answered. “Would you like a piece of +bread?” + +“I'm not much in want of it at this moment,” replied Clare, “but I +should be greatly obliged if you would let me call for it by and +by. You see, sir, when a man has no work, he can't help having no +money!” + +“A man!” thought the baker. “God pity you, poor monkey!” + +He called to some one to mind the shop, removed his apron and put on a +coat, shut the door, and went down the street with Clare. + + + +Chapter XXX. + +The draper. + + +At the shop of a draper and haberdasher, where one might buy almost +anything sold, Clare's new friend stopped and walked in. He asked to +see Mr. Maidstone, and a shopman went to fetch him from behind. He +came out into the public floor. + +“I heard you were in want of a boy, sir,” said the baker, who carried +himself as in the presence of a superior; and certainly fine clothes +and a gold chain and ring did what they could to make the draper +superior to the baker. + +“Hm!” said Mr. Maidstone, looking with contempt at Clare. + +“I rather liked the look of this poor boy, and ventured to bring him +on approval,” continued the baker timidly. “He ain't much to look at, +I confess!” + +“Hm!” said the draper again. “He don't look promising!” + +“He don't. But I think he means performing,” said the baker, with a +wan smile. + +“Donnow, I'm sure! If he 'appened to wash his face, I could tell +better!” + +Clare thought he had washed it pretty well that morning because of his +cut, though he had, to be sure, done it without soap, and had been at +rather dirty work since! + +“He says he's been too hungry to wash his face,” answered the baker. + +“Didn't 'ave his 'ot water in time, I suppose!--Will you answer for +him, Mr. Ball?” + +“I can't, Mr. Maidstone--not one way or another. I simply was taken +with him. I know nothing about him.” + +Here one of the shopmen came up to his master, and said, + +“I heard Mr. Ball's own man yesterday accuse this very boy of taking a +loaf from his cart.” + +“Yesterday!” thought Clare; “it seems a week ago!” + +“Oh! this is the boy, is it?” said the baker. “You see I didn't know +him! All the same, I don't believe he took the loaf.” + +“Indeed I didn't, sir! Another boy took it who didn't know better, and +I took it from him, and was putting it back on the cart when the man +turned round and saw me, and wouldn't listen to a word I said. But a +working-man believed me, and bought the loaf, and gave it between us.” + +“A likely story!” said the draper. + +“I've heard that much,” said the baker, “and I believe it. At least I +have no reason to believe my man against him, Mr. Maidstone. That same +night I discovered he had been cheating me to a merry tune. I +discharged him this morning.” + +“Well, he certainly don't look a respectable boy,” said the draper, +who naturally, being all surface himself, could read no deeper than +clothes; “but I'm greatly in want of one to carry out parcels, and I +don't mind if I try him. If he do steal anything, he'll be caught +within the hour!” + +“Oh, thank you, sir!” said Clare. + +“You shall have sixpence a day,” Mr. Maidstone continued, “--not a +penny more till I'm sure you're an honest boy.” + +“Thank you, sir,” iterated Clare. “Please may I run home first? I +won't be long. I 'ain't got any other clothes, but----” + +“Hold your long tongue. Don't let me hear it wagging in my +establishment. Go and wash your face and hands.” Clare turned to the +baker. + +“Please, sir,” he said softly, “may I go back with you and get the +piece of bread?” + +“What! begging already!” cried Mr. Maidstone. + +“No, no, sir,” interposed the baker. “I promised him a piece of +bread. He did not ask for it.” + +The good man was pleased at his success, and began to regard Clare +with the favour that springs in the heart of him who has done a good +turn to another through a third. Had he helped him out of his own +pocket, he might not have been so much pleased. But there had been no +loss, and there was no risk! He had beside shown his influence with a +superior! + +“I am so much obliged to you, sir!” said Clare as they went away +together. “I cannot tell you how much!” + +He was tempted to open his heart and reveal the fact that three people +would live on the sixpence a day which the baker's kindness had +procured him, but prudence was fast coming frontward, and he saw that +no one must know that they were in that house! If it were known, they +would probably be turned out at once, which would go far to be fatal +to them as a family. For, if he had to pay for lodgings, were it no +more than the tramps paid Tommy's grandmother, sixpence a day would +not suffice for bare shelter. So he held his tongue. + +“Thank me by minding Mr. Maidstone's interests,” returned his +benefactor. “If you don't do well by him, the blame will come upon +me.” + +“I will be very careful, sir,” answered Clare, who was too full of +honesty to think of being honest; he thought only of minding orders. + +They reached the shop; the baker gave him a small loaf, and he hurried +home with it The joy in his heart, spread over the days since he left +the farm, would have given each a fair amount of gladness. + +Taking heed that no one saw him, he darted through the passage to the +well, got across it better this time, rushed over the wall like a cat, +fell on the other side from the unsteadiness of his potsherds, rose +and hurried into the house, with the feeble wail of his baby in his +ears. + + + +Chapter XXXI. + +An addition to the family. + + +The door to the kitchen was open: Tommy must be in the garden again! +When he reached the nursery, as he called it to himself, he found the +baby as he had left her, but moaning and wailing piteously. She looked +as if she had cried till she was worn out. He threw down the clothes +to take her. A great rat sprang from the bed. On one of the tiny feet +the long thin toes were bleeding and raw. The same instant arose a +loud scampering and scuffling and squealing in the room. Clare's heart +quivered. He thought it was a whole army of rats. He was not a bit +afraid of them himself, but assuredly they were not company for baby! +Already they had smelt food in the house, and come in a swarm! What +was to be done with the little one? If he stayed at home with her, she +must die of hunger; if he left her alone, the rats would eat her! They +had begun already! Oh, that wretch, Tommy! Into the water--but he +should go! + +I hope their friends will not take it ill that, all his life after, +Clare felt less kindly disposed toward rats than toward the rest of +the creatures of God. + +But things were not nearly so bad as Clare thought: the scuffling came +from quite another cause. It suddenly ceased, and a sharp scream +followed. Clare turned with the baby in his arms. Almost at his feet, +gazing up at him, the rat hanging limp from his jaws, stood the little +castaway mongrel he had seen in the morning, his eyes flaming, and his +tail wagging with wild homage and the delight of presenting the rat to +one he would fain make his master. + +“You darling!” cried Clare, and meant the dog this time, not the +baby. The animal dropped the dead rat at his feet, and glared, and +wagged, and looked hunger incarnate, but would not touch the rat until +Clare told him to take it. Then he retired with it to a corner, and +made a rapid meal of it. + +He had seen Clare pass the second time, had doubtless noted that now +he carried a loaf, and had followed him in humble hope. Clare was too +much occupied with his own joy to perceive him, else he would +certainly have given him a little peeling or two from the outside of +the bread. But it was decreed that the dog should have the honour of +rendering the first service. Clare was not to do _all_ the +benevolences. + +What a happy day it had been for him! It was a day to be remembered +for ever! He had work! he had sixpence a day! he had had a present of +milk for the baby, and two presents of bread--one a small, and one a +large loaf! And now here was a dog! A dog was more than many meals! +The family was four now! A baby, and a dog to take care of the +baby!--It was heavenly! + +He made haste and gave his baby what milk and water was left. Then he +washed her poor torn foot, wrapped it in a pillow-case, for he would +not tear anything, and laid her in the bed. Next he cut a good big +crust from the loaf and gave it to the dog, who ate it as if the rat +were nowhere. The rest he put in a drawer. Then he washed his face and +hands--as well as he could without soap. After that, he took the dog, +talked to him a little, laid him on the bed beside the baby and talked +to him again, telling him plainly, and impressing upon him, that his +business was the care of the baby; that he must give himself up to +her; that he must watch and tend, and, if needful, fight for the +little one. When at length he left him, it was evident to Clare, by +the solemnity of the dog's face, that he understood his duty +thoroughly. + + + +Chapter XXXII. + +Shop and baby. + + +Once clear of the well and the wall, Clare set off running like a +gaze-hound. Such was the change produced in him by joy and the +satisfaction of hope, that when he entered the shop, no one at first +knew him. His face was as the face of an angel, and none the less +beautiful that it shone above ragged garments. But Mr. Maidstone, the +moment he saw him, and before he had time to recognize him, turned +from the boy with dislike. + +“What a fool the beggar looks!” he said to himself;--then aloud to one +of the young men, “Hand over that parcel of sheets.--Here, +you!--what's your name?” + +“Clare, sir.” + +“I declare against it!” he rejoined, with a coarse laugh of pleasure +at his own fancied wit. “I shall call you Jack!” + +“Very well, sir!” + +“Don't you talk.--Here, Jack, take this parcel to Mrs. +Trueman's. You'll see the address on it.--And look sharp.--You can +read, can't you?” + +The people in the shop stood looking on, some pitifully, all +curiously, for the parcel was of considerable size, and linen is +heavy, while the boy looked pale and thin. But Clare was strong for +his age, and present joy made up for past want. He scarcely looked at +the parcel which the draper proceeded to lay on his shoulder, stooped +a little as he felt its weight, heaved it a little to adjust its +balance, and holding it in its place with one hand, started for the +door, which the master himself held open for him. + +“Please, sir, which way do I turn?” he asked. + +“To the left,” answered Mr. Maidstone. “Ask your way as you go.” + +Clare forgot that he had heard only the lady's name. Her address was +on the parcel, no doubt, but if he dropped it to look, he could not +get it up again by himself. A little way on, therefore, meeting a boy +about his own age returning from school, he asked him to be kind +enough to read the address on his back and direct him. The boy read it +aloud, but gave him false instructions for finding the place. Clare +walked and walked until the weight became almost unendurable, and at +last, though loath, concluded that the boy must have deceived him. He +asked again, but this time of a lady. She took pains not only to tell +him right, but to make him understand right: she was pleased with the +tired gentle face that looked up from beneath the heavy +burden. Perhaps she thought of the proud souls growing pure of their +pride, in Dante's _Purgatorio_. Following her directions, he needed no +further questioning to find the house. But it was hours after the +burden was gone from his shoulder before it was rid of the phantom of +its weight. + +His master rated him for having been so long, and would not permit him +to explain his delay, ordering him to hold his tongue and not answer +back; but the rest of his day's work was lighter; there was no other +heavy parcel to send out. There were so many smaller ones, however, +that, by the time they were all delivered, he had gained something +more than a general idea of how the streets lay, and was a weary wight +when, with the four-pence his master hesitated to give him on the +ground that he was doubtful of his character, he set out at last, +walking soberly enough now, to spend it at Mr. Ball's and the +milk-shop. Of the former he bought a stale three-penny loaf, and the +baker added a piece to make up the weight. Clare took this for +liberality, and returned hearty thanks, which Mr. Ball, I am sorry to +say, was not man enough to repudiate. The other penny he laid out on +milk--but oh, how inferior it was to that the farmer's wife had given +him! The milk-woman, however, not ungraciously granted him the two +matches he begged for. + +On his way to baby, he almost hoped Tommy would not return: he would +gladly be saved putting him in the water-butt! + +He forgot him again as he drew near the nursery, and for a long while +after he reached it. He found the infant and the dog lying as he had +left them. The only sign that either had moved was the strange +cleanness of the tiny gray face which Clare had not ventured to +wash. It gave indubitable evidence that the dog had been licking it +more than a little--probably every few minutes since he was left +curate in charge. + +And now Clare did with deliberation a thing for which his sensitive +conscience not unfrequently reproached him afterward. His defence was, +that he had hurt nobody, and had kept baby alive by it. Having in his +mind revolved the matter many a time that day, he got some sticks +together from the garden, and with one of the precious matches lighted +a small fire of coals that were not his own, and for which he could +merely hope one day to restore amends. But baby! Baby was more than +coals! He filled a rusty kettle with water, and while it was growing +hot on the fire, such was his fear lest the smoke should betray them, +that he ran out every other minute to see how much was coming from the +chimney. + +While the fire was busy heating the water, he was busier preparing a +bottle for baby--making a hole through the cork of a phial, putting the +broken stem of a clean tobacco pipe he had found in the street through +the hole, tying a small lump of cotton wool over the end of the +pipe-stem, and covering that with a piece of his pocket-handkerchief, +carefully washed with the brown Windsor soap, his mother's last present. +For the day held yet another gladness: in looking for a kettle he had +found the soap--which probably the rat had carried away and hidden +before finding baby. Through the pipe-stem and the wool and the +handkerchief he could without difficulty draw water, and hoped therefore +baby would succeed in drawing her supper. As soon as the water was warm +he mixed some with the milk, but not so much this time, and put the +mixture in the bottle. To his delight, the baby sucked it up splendidly. +The bottle, thought out between the heavy linen and the hard street, was +a success! Labour is not unfriendly to thought, as the annals of weaving +and shoe-making witness. + +And now at last was Clare equipped for a great attempt: he was going +to wash the baby! He was glad that disrespectful Tommy was not in the +house. With a basin of warm water and his precious piece of soap he +set about it, and taking much pains washed his treasure perfectly +clean. It was a state of bliss in which, up to that moment, I presume, +she had never been since her birth. In the process he handled her, if +not with all the skill of a nurse, yet with the tenderness of a +mother. His chief anxiety was not to hurt, more than could not be +helped, the poor little rat-eaten toes. He felt he must wash them, but +when in the process she whimpered, it went all through the calves of +his legs. When the happy but solicitous task was over, during which +the infant had shown the submission of great weakness, he wrapped her +in another blanket, and laid her down again. Soothed and comfortable, +as probably never soothed or comfortable before, she went to sleep. + +As soon as she was out of his arms, he took a piece of bread, and with +some of the hot water made a little sop for the dog, which the small +hero, whose four legs carried such a long barrel of starvation, ate +with undisguised pleasure and thankfulness. For his own supper Clare +preferred his bread dry, following it with a fine draught of water +from the well. + +Then, and not till then, returned the thought--what had Tommy done +with himself? Left to himself he was sure to go stealing! He might +have been taken in the act! Clare could hardly believe he had actually +run away from him. On the other hand, he had left the baby, and knew +that if he returned he would be put in the water-butt! He might have +come to the conclusion that he could do better without Clare, who +would not let him steal! It was clear he did not like taking his share +in the work of the family, and looking after the baby! Had he been +anything of a true boy, Clare would have taken his bread in his hand +and gone to look for him; being such as he was, he did not think it +necessary. He felt bound to do his best for him if he came back, but +he did not feel bound to leave the baby and roam the country to find a +boy with whom baby's life would be in constant danger. + + + +Chapter XXXIII. + +A bad penny. + + +Before Clare had done his thinking, darkness had fallen, and, weary to +the very bones, he threw himself on the bed beside the baby. The dog +jumped up and laid himself at his feet, as if the place had been his +from time immemorial--as it had perhaps been, according to time in +dog-land. The many pleasures of that blessed day would have kept Clare +awake had they not brought with them so much weariness. He fell fast +asleep. Tommy had not had a happy day: he had been found out in +evil-doing, had done more evil, and had all the day been in dread of +punishment. He did not foresee how ill things would go for him--did +not see that a rat had taken his place beside the baby, and that he +would not get back before Clare; but the vision of the water-butt had +often flashed upon his inner eye, and it had not been the bliss of his +solitude. He deserted his post in the hope of finding something to +eat, and had not had a mouthful of anything but spongy turnip, and +dried-up mangel-wurzel, or want-root. If he had been minding his work, +he would have had a piece of good bread--so good that he would have +wanted more of it, whereas, when he had eaten the turnip and the +beetroot, he had cause to wish he had not eaten so much! He had been +set upon by boys bigger than himself, and nearly as bad, who, not +being hungry, were in want of amusement, and had proceeded to get it +out of Tommy, just as Tommy would have got it out of the baby had he +dared. They bullied him in a way that would have been to his heart's +content, had he been the bully instead of the bullied. They made him +actually wish he had stayed with the baby--and therewith came the +thought that it was time to go home if he would get back before +Clare. As to what had taken place in the morning, he knew Clare's +forgivingness, and despised him for it. If he found the baby dead, or +anything happened to her that he could not cover with lying, it would +be time to cut and run in earnest! So the moment he could escape from +his tormenters, off went Tommy for home. But as he ran he remembered +that there was but one way into the house, and that was by the very +lip of the water-butt. + +Clare woke up suddenly--at a sound which all his life would wake him +from the deepest slumber: he thought he heard the whimpering of a +child. The baby was fast asleep. Instantly he thought of Tommy. He +seemed to see him shut out in the night, and knew at once how it was +with him: he had gone out without thinking how he was to get back, and +dared not go near the water-butt! He jumped out of bed, put on his +shoes, and in a minute or two was over the wall and walking along the +lane outside of it, to find the deserter. + +The moon was not up, and the night was dark, yet he had not looked +long before he came upon him, as near the house as he could get, +crouching against the wall. + +“Tommy!” said Clare softly. + +Tommy did not reply. The fear of the water-butt was upon him--a fear +darker than the night, an evil worse than hunger or cold--and Clare +and the water-butt were one. + +“You needn't think to hide, Tommy; I see you, you bad boy!” whispered +Clare. “After all I said, you ran away and left the baby to the rats! +They've been biting her horribly--one at least has. You can stay away +as long as you like now; I've got a better nurse. Good-night!” Tommy +gave a great howl. + +“Hold your tongue, you rascal!” cried Clare, still in a +whisper. “You'll let the police know where we are!” + +“Do let me in, Clare! I'm so 'ungry and so cold!” + +“Then I shall have to put you in the water-butt! I said I would!” + +“If you don't promise not to, I'll go straight to the police. They'll +take the brat from you, and put her in the workhouse!” + +Clare thought for a moment whether it would not be right to kill such +a traitor. His mind was full of history-tales, and, like Dante, he put +treachery in its own place, namely the deepest hell. But with the +thought came the words he had said so many times without thinking what +they meant--“Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that +trespass against us,” and he saw that he was expected to forgive +Tommy. + +“Tommy, I forgive you,” he said solemnly, “and will be friends with +you again; but I have said it, and I was right to say it, and into the +water-butt you must go! I can't trust your word now, and I think I +shall be able to trust it after that.” + +Ere he had finished the words, Tommy lifted up his voice in a most +unearthly screech. + +Instantly Clare had him by the throat, so that he could not utter a +sound. + +“Tommy,” he said, “I'm going to let you breathe again, but the moment +you make a noise, I'll choke you as I'm doing now.” + +With that he relaxed his hold. But Tommy had paid no heed to what he +said, and began a second screech the moment he found passage for +it. Immediately he was choked, and after two or three attempts, +finally desisted. + +“I won't!” he said. + +“You shall, Tommy. You're going head over in the butt. We're going to +it now!” + +Tommy threw himself upon the ground and kicked, but dared not +scream. It was awful! He would drop right through into the great place +where the moon was! + +Clare threw him over his shoulder, and found him not half the weight +of the parcel of linen. Tommy would have bitten like a weasel, but he +feared Clare's terrible hands. He was on the back of Giant Despair, in +the form of one of the best boys in the world. Clare took him round +the wall, and over the fence into the blacksmith's yard. The smithy +was quite dark. + +“Please, I didn't mean to do it!” sobbed Tommy from behind him, as +Clare bore him steadily up the yard. It was all he could do to say the +words, for the thought of what they were approaching sent a scream +into his throat every time he parted his lips to speak. + +Clare stopped. + +“What didn't you mean to do?” he asked. + +“I didn't mean to leave the baby.” + +“How did you do it then?” + +“I mean I didn't mean to stay away so long. I didn't know how to get +back.” + +“I told you not to leave her! And you could have got back perfectly, +you little coward!” + +Tommy shuddered, and said no more. Though hanging over Clare's back he +knew presently, by his stopping, that they had come to the heap. There +was only that heap and the wall between him and the water-butt! Up and +up he felt himself slowly, shakingly carried, and was gathering his +breath for a final utterance of agony that should rouse the whole +neighbourhood, when Clare, having reached the top, seated himself upon +the wall, and Tommy restrained himself in the hope of what a parley +might bring. But he sat down only to wheel on the pivot of his spine, +as he had seen them do on the counter in the shop, and sit with his +legs alongside of the water-butt. Then he drew Tommy from his shoulder, +in spite of his clinging, and laid him across his knees; and Tommy, +divining there were words yet to be said, and hoping to get off with a +beating, which he did not mind, remained silent. + +“Your hour is come, Tommy!” said Clare. “If you scream, I will drop +you in, and hold you only by one leg. If you don't scream, I will hold +you by both legs. If you scream when I take you out, in you go again! +I do what I say, Tommy!” + +The wretched boy was nearly mad with terror. But now, much as he +feared the water, he feared yet more for the moment him in whom lay +the power of the water. Clare took him by the heels. + +“I'm sorry there's no moon, as I promised you,” he said; “she won't +come up for my calling. I should have liked you to see where you were +going. But if you ain't an honest boy after this, you shall have +another chance; and next time we will wait for the moon!” + +With that he lifted Tommy's legs, holding him by the ankles, and would +have shoved his body over the edge of the butt into the water. But +Tommy clung fast to his knees. + +“Leave go, Tommy,” he said, “or I'll tumble you right in.” + +Tommy yielded, his will overcome by a greater fear. Clare let him hang +for a moment over the black water, and slowly lowered him. Tommy clung +to the side of the butt. Clare let go one leg, and taking hold of his +hands pulled them away. Tommy's terror would have burst in a frenzied +yell, but the same instant he was down to the neck in the water, and +lifted out again. He spluttered and gurgled and tried to scream. + +“Now, Tommy,” said Clare, “don't scream, or I'll put you in again.” + +But Tommy never believed anything except upon compulsion. The moment +he could, that moment he screamed, and that moment he was in the water +again. The next time he was taken out, he did not scream. Clare laid +him on the wall, and he lay still, pretending to be drowned. Clare got +up, set him on his feet in front of him, and holding him by the +collar, trotted him round the top of the wall to the door, and dropped +him into the garden. He was quiet enough now--more than +subdued--incapable even of meditating revenge. But when they entered +the nursery, the dog, taking Tommy for a worse sort of rat, made a +leap at him right off the bed, as if he would swallow him alive, and +the start and the terror of it brought him quite to himself again. + +“Quiet, Abdiel!” said Clare. + +The dog turned, jumped up on the bed, and lay down again close to the +baby. + +Clare, who, I have said, was in old days a reader of _Paradise Lost_, +had already given him the name of _Abdiel_. + +“Please, I couldn't help yelling!” said Tommy, very meekly. “I didn't +know you'd got _him_!” + +“I know you couldn't help it!” answered Clare. “What have you had to +eat to-day?” + +“Nothing but a beastly turnip and a wormy beet,” said Tommy. “I'm +awful hungry.” + +“You'd have had something better if you'd stuck by the baby, and not +left her to the rats!” + +“There ain't no rats,” growled Tommy. + +“Will you believe your own eyes?” returned Clare, and showed him the +skin of the rat Abdiel had slain. “I've a great mind to make you eat +it!” he added, dangling it before him by the tail. + +“Shouldn't mind,” said Tommy. “I've eaten a rat afore now, an' I'm +that hungry! Rats ain't bad to eat. I don't know about their skins!” + +“Here's a piece of bread for you. But you sha'n't sleep with honest +people like baby and Abdiel. You shall lie on the hearth-rug. Here's a +blanket and a pillow for you!” + +Clare covered him up warm, thatching all with a piece of loose carpet, +and he was asleep directly. + +The next day all terror of the water-butt was gone from the little +vagabond's mind. He was now, however, thoroughly afraid of Clare, and +his conceit that, though Clare was the stronger, he was the cleverer, +was put in abeyance. + + + +Chapter XXXIV. + +How things went for a time. + + +Clare's next day went much as the preceding, only that he was early at +the shop. When his dinner-hour came, he ran home, and was glad to find +Tommy and the dog mildly agreeable to each other. He had but time to +give baby some milk, and Tommy and Abdiel a bit of bread each. + +His look when he returned, a look of which he was unaware, but which +one of the girls, who had a year ago been hungry for weeks together, +could read, made her ask him what he had had for dinner. He said he +had had no dinner. + +“Why?” she asked. + +“Because there wasn't any.” + +“Didn't your mother keep some for you?” + +“No; she couldn't.” + +“Then what will you do?” + +“Go without,” answered Clare with a smile. + +“But you've got a mother?” said the girl, rendered doubtful by his +smile. + +“Oh, yes! I've got two mothers. But their arms ain't long enough,” + replied Clare. + +The girl wondered: was he an idiot, or what they called a poet? +Anyhow, she had a bun in her pocket, which she had meant to eat at +five o'clock, and she offered him that. + +“But what will you do yourself? Have you another?” asked Clare, +unready to take it. + +“No,” she answered; “why shouldn't I go without as well as you?” + +“Because it won't make things any better. There will be just as much +hunger. It's only shifting it from me to you. That will leave it all +the same!” + +“No, not the same,” she returned. “I've had a good dinner--as much as +I could eat; and you've had none!” + +Clare was persuaded, and ate the girl's bun with much satisfaction and +gratitude. + +When he had his wages in the evening, he spent them as before--a penny +for the baby, and fivepence at Mr. Ball's for Tommy, Abdiel, and +himself. + +Observing that he came daily, and spent all he earned, except one +penny, on bread; seeing also that the boy's cheeks, though plainly he +was in good health, were very thin, Mr. Ball wondered a little: a boy +ought to look better than that on five pennyworth of bread a day! + +They were a curious family--Clare, and Tommy, and the baby, and +Abdiel. But the only thing sad about it was, that Clare, who was the +head and the heart of it, and provided for all, should be upheld by no +human sympathy, no human gratitude; that he should be so high above +his companions that, though he never thought he was lonely, he could +not help feeling lonely. Not once did he wish himself rid of any +single member of his adopted family. It was living on his very body; +he was growing a little thinner every day; if things had gone on so, +he must before long have fallen ill; but he never thought of himself +at all, body or soul. + +He had no human sympathy or gratitude, I say, but he had both sympathy +and gratitude from Abdiel. The dog never failed to understand what +Clare wished and expected him to understand. In Clare's absence he +took on himself the protection of the establishment, and was Tommy's +superior. + +Though Tommy was of no use to earn bread, Clare did not therefore +allow him to be idle. He insisted on his keeping the place clean and +tidy, and in this respect Tommy was not quite a failure. He even made +him do some washing, though not much could be accomplished in that way +where there was so little to wash. Now that Abdiel was nurse, Tommy +had the run of the garden, and often went beyond it for an hour or two +without Clare's knowledge, but always took good care to be back before +his return. + +A bale of goods happening to be unpacked in his presence one day, +Clare begged the head-shopman, who was also a partner, for a piece of +what it was wrapped in; and he, having noted how well he worked, and +being quite aware they could not get another such boy at such wages, +gave him a large piece of the soiled canvas. Now Mrs. Person had +taught Clare to work,--as I think all boys ought to be taught, so as +not to be helpless without mother or sister,--and with the help of a +needle and some thread the friendly girl gave him, he soon made of the +packing-sheet a pair of trousers for Tommy, of a primitive but not +unserviceable cut, and a shirt for himself, of fashion more primitive +still. He managed it this way: he cut a hole in the middle of a piece +of the stuff, through which to put his head, and another hole on each +side of that, through which to put his arms, and hemmed them all +round. Then, having first hemmed the garment also, he indued it, and +let the voluminous mass arrange itself as it might, under as much of +his jacket and trousers as cohered. + +My reader may well wonder how, in what was called a respectable shop, +he could be permitted to appear in such poverty; but Mr. Maidstone +disliked the boy so much that he meant to send him away the moment he +found another to do his work, and gave orders that he should never +come up from the basement except when wanted to carry a parcel. The +fact was that his still, solemn, pure face was a haunting rebuke to +his master, although he did not in the least recognize the nature, or +this as the cause, of his dislike. + + + +Chapter XXXV. + +Clare disregards the interests of his employers. + + +Things went on for nearly a month, every one thriving but Clare. Yet +was Clare as peaceful as any, and much happier than Tommy, to whose +satisfaction adventure was needful. + +One day, a lady, attracted by a muff in the shop-window labelled with +a very low price, entered, and requested to see it. + +“We can offer you a choice from several of the sort, madam,” said the +shopman. “It is one of a lot we bought cheap, but quite uninjured, +after a fire.” + +“I want to see the one in the window,” the lady answered. + +“I hope you will excuse me, madam,” returned the shopman. “The muff is +in a position hard to reach. Besides, we must ask leave to take +anything down after the window is dressed for the day, and the master +is out. But I will bring you the same fur precisely.” + +So saying, he went, and returned presently with a load of muffs and +other furs, which he threw on the counter. But the lady had heard that +“there's tricks i' the world,” and persisted in demanding a sight of +the muff in the window. Being a “tall personage” and cool, she carried +her point. The muff was hooked down and brought her--not +graciously. She glanced at it, turned it over, looked inside, and +said, + +“I will take it. Please bring a bandbox for it.” + +“I will, madam,” said the man, and would have taken the muff. But she +held it fast, sought her purse, and laid the price on the counter. The +shopman saw that she knew what both of them were about, took up the +money, went and fetched a bandbox, put the muff in it before her eyes, +and tied it up. The lady held out her hand for it. + +“Shall I not send it for you, madam?” he said. + +“I do not live here,” she answered. “I am on my way to the station.” + +“Here, Jack,” cried the shopman to Clare, whom he caught sight of that +moment going down to the basement, “take this bandbox, and go with the +lady to the station.” + +If his transaction with the lady had pleased the man, he would not +have sent such a scarecrow to attend her, although she did not belong +to the town, and they might never see her again! The lady, on her +part, was about to insist on carrying the bandbox herself; but when +Clare came forward, and looked up smiling in her face, she was at once +aware that she might trust him. The man stood watching for the moment +when she should turn her back, that he might substitute another +bandbox for the one Clare carried; but Clare never looked at him, and +when the lady walked out of the shop, walked straight out after +her. Along the street he followed her steadily, she looking round +occasionally to see that he was behind her. + +They had gone about half-way to the station, when from a side street +came a lad whom Clare knew as one employed in the packing-room. He +carried a box exactly like that Clare had in his hand, and came softly +up behind him. Clare did not turn his head, for he did not want to +talk to him while he was attending on the lady. + +“Look spry!” he said in a whisper. “She don't twig! It's all right! +Maidstone sent me.” + +Clare looked round. The lad held out his bandbox for him to take, and +his empty hand to take Clare's instead. But Clare had by this time +begun to learn a little caution. Besides, the lady's interests were in +his care, and he could be party to nothing done behind her back! He +had not time to think, but knew it his duty to stick by the +bandbox. If we have come up through the animals to be what we are, +Clare must have been a dog of a good, faithful breed, for he did right +now as by some ancient instinct. He held fast to the box, neither +slackening his pace nor uttering a word. The lad gave him a great +punch. Clare clung the harder to the box. The lady heard something, +and turned her head. The boy already had his back to her, and was +walking away, but she saw that Clare's face was flushed. + +“What is the matter?” she asked. + +“I don't rightly know, ma'am. He wanted me to give him my bandbox for +his, and said Mr. Maidstone had sent him. But I couldn't, you +know!--except he asked you first. You did pay for it--didn't you, +ma'am?” + +“Of course I did, or he wouldn't have let me take it away! But if you +don't know what it means, I do.--You haven't been in that shop long, +have you?” + +“Not quite a month, ma'am.” + +“I thought so!” + +She said no more, and Clare followed in silence, wondering not a +little. When they reached the station, she took the bandbox, and +looked at the boy. He returned her gaze, his gray eyes wondering. She +searched her purse for a shilling, but, unable to find one, was not +sorry to give him a half-crown instead. + +“You had better not mention that I gave you anything?” she said. + +“I will not, ma'am, except they ask me,” he answered. + +“But,” he added, his face in a glow of delight, “is all this for me?” + +“To be sure,” she answered. “I am much obliged to you for--carrying my +parcel. Be a honest boy whatever comes, and you will not repent it.” + +“I will try, ma'am,” said Clare. + +But, to speak accurately, he did not know what it was to _try_ to be +honest: he had never been tempted to be anything else, and had +scarcely had the idea of dishonesty in his mind except in relation to +Tommy. Do you say, “Then it was no merit to him”? Certainly it was +none. Who was thinking of merit? Not Clare. He is a sneak who thinks +of merit. He is a cad who can't do a gentlemanly action without +thinking himself a fine fellow! It might be a merit in many a man to +act as Clare did, but in Clare it was pure rightness--or, if you like +the word better, righteousness. + +Clare as little thought what awaited him. Had there been any truth, +any appreciation of honesty in his vulgar heart, Mr. Maidstone could +not have done as now he did. When his messenger came back with the +tale of how he had been foiled, he said nothing, but his lips grew +white. He closed them fast, and went and stood near the door. When +Clare, unsuspecting as innocent, opened it, he was met by a blow that +dazed him, and a fierce kick that sent him on his back to the +curbstone. Almost insensible, but with the impression that something +was interfering between him and his work, he returned to the door. As +he laid his hand on it, it opened a little, and his master's face, +with a hateful sneer upon it, shot into the crack, and spit in +his. Then the door shut so sharply that his fingers caught an +agonizing pinch. At last he understood: he was turned off, and his +day's wages were lost! + +What would have become of him now but for the half-crown the lady had +given him! She was not _quite_ a lady, or she would have walked out of +the shop, and declined to gain by frustrating a swindle; but she was a +good-hearted woman, and God's messenger to Clare. He bought a bigger +loaf than usual, at which, and the time of the day when he bought it, +and the half-crown presented in payment, Mr. Ball wondered; but +neither said anything--Mr. Ball from indecision, Clare from eagerness +to get home to his family. + + + +Chapter XXXVI. + +The policeman. + + +But, alas! Clare had made another enemy--the lad whose attempt to +change the bandboxes he had foiled. The fellow followed him, +lurkingly, all the way home--on the watch for fit place to pounce upon +him, and punish him for doing right when he wanted him to do wrong. He +saw him turn into the opening that led to the well, and thought now he +had him. But when he followed him in, he was not to be seen! He did +not care to cross the well, not knowing what might meet him on the +other side; but here was news to carry back! He did so; and his master +saw in them the opportunity of indulging his dislike and revenge, and +a means of invalidating whatever Clare might reveal to his discredit! + +Clare and the baby and Tommy and Abdiel had taken their supper with +satisfaction, and were all asleep. It was to them as the middle of the +night, though it was but past ten o'clock, when Abdiel all at once +jumped right up on his four legs, cocked his ears, listened, leaped +off the bed, ran to the door, and began to bark furiously. He was +suddenly blinded by the glare of a bull's-eye-lantern, and received a +kick that knocked all the bark out of him, and threw him to the other +side of the room. A huge policeman strode quietly in, sending the +glare of his bull's-eye all about the room like a vital, inquiring +glance. It discovered, one after the other, every member of the +family. So tired was Clare, however, that he did not wake until seized +by a rough hand, and at one pull dragged standing on the floor. + +“Take care of the baby!” he cried, while yet not half awake. + +“_I'll_ take care o' the baby, never fear!--an' o' you too, you young +rascal!” returned the policeman. + +He roused Tommy, who was wide awake, but pretending to be asleep, with +a gentle kick. + +“Up ye get!” he said; and Tommy got up, rubbing his ferret eyes. + +“Come along!” said the policeman. + +“Where to?” asked Clare. + +“You'll see when you get there.” + +“But I can't leave baby!” + +“Baby must come along too,” answered the policeman, more gently, for +he had children of his own. + +“But she has no clothes to go in!” objected Clare. + +“She must go without, then.” + +“But she'll take cold!” + +“She don't run naked in the house, do she?” + +“No; she can't run yet. I keep her in a blanket. But the blanket ain't +mine; I can't take it with me.” + +“You're mighty scrup'lous!” returned the policeman. “You don't mind +takin' a 'ole 'ouse an' garding, but you wouldn' think o' takin' a +blanket!--Oh, no! Honest boy _you_ are!” + +He turned sharp round, and caught Tommy taking a vigorous sight at +him. Tommy, courageous as a lion behind anybody's back, dropped on the +rug sitting. + +“We've done the house no harm,” said Clare, “and I will _not_ take the +blanket. It would be stealing!” + +“Then I will take it, and be accountable for it,” rejoined the man. “I +hope that will satisfy you!” + +“Certainly,” answered Clare. “You are a policeman, and that makes it +all right.” + +“Rouse up then, and come along. I want to get home.” + +“Please, sir, wouldn't it do in the morning?” pleaded Clare. “I've no +work now, and could easily go then. That way we should all have a +sleep.” + +“My eye ain't green enough,” replied the policeman. “Look sharp!” + +Clare said no more, but went to the baby. With sinking but courageous +heart, he wrapped her closer in her blanket, and took her in his +arms. He could not help her crying, but she did not scream. Indeed she +never really screamed; she was not strong enough to scream. + +“Get along,” said the policeman. + +Clare led the way with his bundle, sorely incommoded by the size and +weight of the wrapping blanket, the corners of which, one after the +other, would keep working from his hold, and dropping and trailing on +the ground. Behind him came Tommy, a scarecrow monkey, with +mischievous face, and greedy beads for eyes--type not unknown to the +policeman, who brought up the rear, big enough to have all their sizes +cut out of him, and yet pass for a man. Down the stair they went, and +out at the front door, which Clare for the first time saw open, and so +by the iron gate into the street. + +“Which way, please?” asked Clare, turning half round with the +question. + +“To the right, straight ahead. The likes o' you, young un, might know +the way to the lock-up without astin'!” + +Clare made no answer, but walked obedient. It was a sad +procession--comical indeed, but too sad when realized to continue +ludicrous. The thin, long-bodied, big-headed, long-haired, +long-tailed, short-legged animal that followed last, seemed to close +it with a never-ending end. + +There was no moon; nothing but the gas-lamps lighted Clare's _Via +dolorosa_. He hugged the baby and kept on, laying his cheek to hers to +comfort her, and receiving the comfort he did not seek. + +They came at last to the _lock-up_, a new building in the rear of the +town-house. There this tangle of humanity, torn from its rock and +afloat on the social sea, drifted trailing into a bare brilliant room, +and at its head, cast down but not destroyed, went heavy-laden Clare, +with so much in him, but only his misery patent to eyes too much used +to misery to reap sorrow from the sight. + +The head policeman--they called him the inspector--received the +charge, that of house-breaking, and entered it. Then they were taken +away to the lock-up--all but the faithful Abdiel, who, following, +received another of the kicks which that day rained on every member of +that epitome of the human family except the baby, who, small enough +for a mother to drown, was too small for a policeman to kick. The door +was shut upon them, and they had to rest in that grave till the +resurrection of the morning should bring them before the magistrate. + +Their quarters were worse than chilly--to all but the baby in her +blanket manifoldly wrapped about her, and in Clare's arms. Tommy would +gladly have shared that blanket, more gladly yet would have taken it +all for himself and left the baby to perish; but he had to lie on the +broad wooden bench and make the best of it, which he did by snoring +all the night. It passed drearily for Clare, who kept wide awake. He +was not anxious about the morrow; he had nothing to be ashamed of, +therefore nothing to fear; but he had baby to protect and cherish, and +he dared not go to sleep. + + + +Chapter XXXVII. + +The magistrate. + + +The dawn came at last, and soon after the dawn footsteps, but they +approached only to recede. When the door at length opened, it was but +to let a pair of eyes glance round on them, and close again. The hours +seemed to be always beginning, and never going on. But at the long +last came the big policeman. To Clare's loving eyes, how friendly he +looked! + +“Come, kids!” he said, and took them through a long passage to a room +in the town-hall, where sat a formal-looking old gentleman behind a +table. + +“Good morning, sir!” said Clare, to the astonishment of the +magistrate, who set his politeness down as impudence. + +Nor was the mistake to be wondered at; for the baby in Clare's arms +hid, with the mountain-like folds of its blanket, the greater part of +his face, and the old gentleman's eyes fell first on Tommy; and if +ever _scamp_ was written clear on a countenance, it was written clear +on Tommy's. + +“Hold your impudent tongue!” said a policeman, and gave Clare a cuff +on the head. + +“Hold, John,” interposed the magistrate; “it is my part to punish, not +yours.” + +“Thank you, sir,” said Clare. + +“I will thank _you_, sir,” returned the magistrate, “not to speak till +I put to you the questions I am about to put to you.--What is the +charge against the prisoners?” + +“Housebreaking, sir,” answered the big man. + +“What! Housebreaking! Boys with a baby! House-breakers don't generally +go about with babies in their arms! Explain the thing.” + +The policeman said he had received information that unlawful +possession had been taken of a building commonly known as The Haunted +House, which had been in Chancery for no one could tell how many +years. He had gone to see, and had found the accused in possession of +the best bedroom--fast asleep, surrounded by indications that they had +made themselves at home there for some time. He had brought them +along. + +The magistrate turned his eyes on Clare. + +“You hear what the policeman says?” he said. + +“Yes, sir,” answered Clare. + +“Well?” + +“Sir?” + +“What have you to say to it?” + +“Nothing, sir.” + +“Then you allow it is true?” + +“Yes, sir.” + +“What right had you to be there?” + +“None, sir. But we had nowhere else to go, and nobody seemed to want +the place. We didn't hurt anything. We swept away a multitude of dead +moths, and killed a lot of live ones, and destroyed a whole granary of +grubs; and the dog killed a great rat.” + +“What is your name?” + +“Clare--Porson,” answered Clare, with a little intervening hesitation. + +“You are not quite sure?” + +“Yes; that is my name; but I have another older one that I don't +know.” + +“A bad answer! The name you go by is not your own! Hum! Is that boy +your brother?” + +“No, sir.” + +“Your cousin?” + +“No, sir; he's not any relation of mine. He's a tramp.” + +“And what are you?” + +“Something like one now, sir, but I wasn't always.” + +“What were you?” + +“Not much, sir. I didn't _do_ anything till just lately.” + +He could not bear at the moment to talk of his be-loved dead. He felt +as if the old gentleman would be rude to them. + +“Is the infant there your sister?” + +“She's my sister the big way: God made her. She's not my sister any +other way.” + +“How does she come to be with you then?” + +“I took her out of the water-butt. Some one threw her in, and I heard +the splash, and went and got her out.” + +“Why did you not take her to the police?” + +“I never thought of that. It was all I could do to keep her alive. I +couldn't have done it if we hadn't got into the house.” + +“How long ago is that?” + +“Nearly a month, sir.” + +“And you've kept her there ever since?” + +“Yes, sir--as well as I could. I had only sixpence a day.” + +“And what's that boy's name?” + +“Tommy, sir.--I don't know any other.” + +“Nice respectable company you keep for one who has evidently been well +brought up!” + +“Baby's quite respectable, sir!” + +“Hum!” + +“And for Tommy, if I didn't keep him, he would steal. I'm teaching him +not to steal.” + +“What woman have you got with you?” + +“Baby's the only woman we've got, sir.” + +“But who attends to her?” + +“I do, sir. She only wants washing and rolling round in the blanket; +she's got no clothes to speak of. When I'm away, Tommy and Abdiel take +care of her.” + +“Abdiel! Who on earth is that? Where is he?” said the magistrate, +looking round for some fourth member of the incomprehensible family. + +“He's not on earth, sir; he's in heaven--the good angel, you know, +sir, that left Satan and came back again to God.” + +“You must take him to the county-asylum, James!” said the magistrate, +turning to the tall policeman. + +“Oh, he's all right, sir!” said James. + +“Please, sir,” interrupted Clare eagerly, “I didn't mean the dog was +in heaven yet. I meant the angel I named him after!” + +“They _had_ a little dog with them, sir!” + +“Yes--Abdiel. He wanted to be a prisoner too, but they wouldn't let +him in. He's a good dog--better than Tommy.” + +“So! like all the rest of you, you can keep a dog!” + +“He followed me home because he hadn't anybody to love,” said +Clare. “He don't have much to eat, but he's content. He would eat +three times as much if I could give it him; but he never complains.” + +“Have you work of any sort?” + +“I had till yesterday, sir.” + +“Where?” + +“At Mr. Maidstone's shop.” + +“What wages had you?” + +“Sixpence a day.” + +“And you lived, all three of you, on that?” + +“Yes; all four of us, sir.” + +“What do you do at the shop?” + +“Please your worship,” interposed policeman James, “he was sent about +his business yesterday.” + +“Yes,” rejoined Clare, who did not understand the phrase, “I was sent +with a lady to carry her bandbox to the station.” + +“And when you came back, you was turned away, wasn't you?” said James. + +“Yes, sir.” + +“What had you done?” asked the magistrate. + +“I don't quite know, sir.” + +“A likely story!” + +Clare made no reply. + +“Answer me directly.” + +“Please, sir, you told me not to speak unless you asked me a +question.” + +“I said, 'A likely story!' which meant, 'Do you expect me to believe +that?'” + +“Of course I do, sir.” + +“Why?” + +“Because it is true.” + +“How am I to believe that?” + +“I don't know, sir. I only know I've got to speak the truth. It's the +person who hears it that's got to believe it, ain't it, sir?” + +“You've got to prove it.” + +“I don't think so, sir; I never was told so; I was only told I must +speak the truth; I never was told I must prove what I said.--I've been +several times disbelieved, I know.” + +“I should think so indeed!” + +“It was by people who did not know me.” + +“Never by people who did know you?” + +“I think not, sir. I never was by the people at home.” + +“Ah! you could not read what they were thinking!” + +“Were you not believed when you were at home, sir?” + +The magistrate's doubt of Clare had its source in the fact that, +although now he was more careful to speak the truth than are most +people, it was not his habit when a boy, and he had suffered severely +in consequence. He was annoyed, therefore, at his question, set him +down as a hypocritical, boastful prig, and was seized with a strong +desire to shame him. + +“I remand the prisoner for more evidence. Take the children to the +workhouse,” he said. + +Tommy gave a sudden full-sized howl. He had heard no good of the +workhouse. + +“The baby is mine!” pleaded Clare. + +“Are you the father of it?” said the big policeman. + +“Yes, I think so: I saved her life.--She would have been drowned if I +hadn't looked for her when I heard the splash!” reasoned Clare, his +face drawn with grief and the struggle to keep from crying. + +“She's not yours,” said the magistrate. “She belongs to the +parish. Take her away, James.” + +The big policeman came up to take her. Clare would have held her +tight, but was afraid of hurting her. He did draw back from the +outstretched hands, however, while he put a question or two. + +“Please, sir, will the parish be good to her?” he asked. + +“Much better than you.” + +“Will it let me go and see her?” he asked again, with an outbreaking +sob. + +“You can't go anywhere till you're out of this,” answered the big +policeman, and, not ungently, took the baby from him. + +“And when will that be, please?” asked Clare, with his empty arms +still held out. + +“That depends on his worship there.” + +“Hold your tongue, James,” said the magistrate. “Take the boy away, +John.” + +“Please, sir, where am I going to?” asked Clare. + +“To prison, till we find out about you.” + +“Please, sir, I didn't mean to steal her. I didn't know the parish +wanted her!” + +“Take the boy away, I tell you!” cried the magistrate angrily. “His +tongue goes like the hopper of a mill!” + +James, carrying the baby on one arm, was already pushing Tommy before +him by the neck. Tommy howled, and rubbed his red eyes with what was +left him of cuffs, but did not attempt resistance. + +“Please, don't let anybody hold her upside down, policeman!” cried +Clare. “She doesn't like it!--Oh, baby! baby!” + +John tightened his grasp on his arm, and hurried him away in another +direction. + +Where the big policeman issued with his charge, there was Abdiel +hovering about as if his spring were wound up so tight that it +wouldn't go off. How he came to be at that door, I cannot imagine. + +When he spied Tommy, he rushed at him. Tommy gave him a kick that +rolled him over. + +“Don't want _you_, you mangy beast!” he said, and tried to kick him +again. + +Abdiel kept away from him after that, but followed the party to the +workhouse, where also, to his disgust, plainly expressed, he was +refused admittance. He returned to the entrance by which Clare had +vanished from his eyes the night before, and lay down there. I suspect +he had an approximate canine theory of the whole matter. He knew at +least that Clare had gone in with the others at that door; that he had +not come out with them at the other door; that, therefore, in all +probability, he was within that door still. + +The police made inquiry at Mr. Maidstone's shop. Reasons for his +dismissal were there given involving no accusation: there was little +desire in that quarter to have the matter searched into. There was +therefore nothing to the discredit of the boy, beyond his running to +earth in the neglected house like a wild animal. After three days he +was set at liberty. + +As the big policeman led the way to the door to send him out, Clare +addressed him thus: + +“Please, Mr. James, may I go back to the house for a little while?” + +“Well, you _are_ an innocent!” said James; “--or,” he added, “the +biggest little humbug ever I see!--No, it's not likely!” + +“I only wanted,” explained Clare, “to set things straight a bit. The +house is cleaner than it was, _I_ know, but it is not in such good +order as when we went into it. I don't like to leave it worse than we +found it.” + +“Never you heed,” said James, believing him perfectly before he knew +what he was about. “The house don't belong to nobody, so far as ever I +heerd, an' the things'll rot all the same wherever they stand.” + +“But I should like,” persisted Clare. + +“I couldn't do it off my own hook, an' his worship would think you +only wanted to steal something. The best thing you can do is to leave +the place at once, an' go where nobody knows nothing agin you.” + +Thought Clare with himself, “If the house doesn't belong to anybody, +why wouldn't they let me stay in it?” + +But the policeman opened the door, and as he was turning to say +good-bye to him, gave him a little shove, and closed it behind him. + + + +Chapter XXXVIII. + +The workhouse. + + +He went into the street with a white face and a dazed look--not from +any hardship he had experienced during his confinement, for he had +been in what to him was clover, but because he had lost the baby and +Abdiel, and because his mind had been all the time in perplexity with +regard to the proceedings of justice: he did not and could not see +that he had done anything wrong. Throughout his life it never mattered +much to Clare to be accused of anything wrong, but it did trouble him, +this time at least, to be punished for doing what was right. He took +it very quietly, however. + +Indignation may be a sign of innocence, but it is no necessary +consequence of innocence any more than it is a proof of +righteousness. A man will be fiercely indignant at an accusation that +happens to be false, who did the very thing last week, and is ready to +do it again. Indignation against wrong to another even, is no proof of +a genuine love of fair play. Clare hardly resented anything done to +himself. His inward unconscious purity held him up, and made him look +events in the face with an eye that was single and therefore at once +forgiving and fearless. The man who has no mote in his own eye cannot +be knocked down by the beam in his neighbour's; while he who is busy +with the mote in his neighbour's may stumble to destruction over the +beam in his own. + +White and dazed as he came out, the moment he stepped across the +threshold, Clare met the comfort of God waiting for him. His eyes +blinded with the great light, for it was a glorious morning in the +beginning of June, he found himself assailed in unknightly fashion +below the knee: there, to his unspeakable delight, was Abdiel, +clinging to him with his fore-legs, and wagging his tail as if, like +the lizards for terror, he would shake it off for gladness! What a +blessed little pendulum was Abdiel's tail! It went by that weight of +the clock of the universe called devotion. It was the escapement of +that delight which is of the essence of existence, and which, when God +has set right “our disordered clocks,” will be its very consciousness. + +Clare stood for a moment and looked about him. The needle of his +compass went round and round. It had no north. He could not go back to +the shop; he could not go back to the house; baby was in the +workhouse, but he could not stay there even if they would let him! +Neither could he stop in the town; the policeman said he must go away! +Where was he to go? There was not in the world one place for him +better than another! But they would let him see baby before he +went!--and off he set to find the workhouse. + +Abdiel followed quietly at his heel, for his master walked lost in +thought, and Abdiel was too hungry to make merry without his +notice. Clare, fresh to the world, had been a great reader for one so +young, and could encounter new experience with old knowledge. In his +mind stood a pile of fir-cones, and dried sticks, and old olive wood, +which the merest touch of experience would set in a blaze of practical +conclusion. But the workhouse was so near that his reflections before +he reached it amounted only to this--that there are worse places than +a prison when you have done nothing to deserve being put in it. A +palace may be one of them. You get enough to eat in a prison; in a +palace you do not; you get too much! + +The porter at the workhouse informed him it was not the day for seeing +the inmates; but the tall policeman had given Clare a hint, and he +requested to see the matron. After much demur and much entreaty, the +man went and told the matron. She, knowing the story of the baby, +wanted to see Clare, and was so much pleased with his manners and +looks, that his sad clothes pleaded for and not against him. She took +him at once to the room where the baby was with many more, telling him +he must prove she was his by picking her out. It was not wonderful +that Clare, who knew the faces of animals so well, should know his own +baby the moment he saw her, notwithstanding that she was decently +clothed, and had already improved in appearance. But the nurses +declared they had never before seen a man, not to say a boy, who could +tell one baby from another. + +“Why,” rejoined Clare, “my dog Abdiel could pick out the baby he was +nurse to!” + +“Ah, but he's a dog!” + +“And I'm a boy!” said Clare. + +He descried her on the lap of an old woman, seeming to him very old, +who was at the head of the nursery-department. Old as she was, +however, she had a keen eye, and a handsome countenance, with a +quantity of white hair. Unlike the rest of the women, though not far +removed from them socially, she knew several languages, so far as to +read and enjoy books in them. Now and then a great woman may be found +in a workhouse, like a first folio of Shakspere on a bookstall, +among--oh, such companions! + +“Let me take her,” said Clare modestly, holding out his hands for the +baby. + +“Are you sure you will not let her drop?” + +“Why, ma'am,” answered Clare, “she's my own baby! It was I took her +out of the water-butt! I washed and fed her every day!--not that I +could do it so well as you, ma'am!” + +She gave him the baby, and watched him with the eye of a seeress, for +she had a wonderful insight into character, and that is one of the +roots of prophecy. + +“You are a good and true lad,” she said at length, “and a hard success +lies before you. I don't know what you will come to, but, with those +eyes, and that forehead, and those hands, if you come to anything but +good, you will be terribly to blame.” + +“I will try to be good, ma'am,” said Clare simply. “But I wish I knew +what they put me in prison for!” + +“What, indeed, my lamb!” she returned; and her eyes flashed with +indignation under the cornice of her white hair. “They'll be put in +prison one day themselves that did it!” + +“Oh, I don't mind!” said Clare. “I don't want them to be punished. You +see I'm only waiting!” + +“What are you waiting for, sonny?” asked the old woman. + +“I don't exactly know--though I know better than what I was put in +prison for. Nobody ever told me anything, but I'm always waiting for +something.” + +“The something will come, child. You will have what you want! Only go +on as you're doing, and you'll be a great man one day.” + +“I don't want to be a great man,” answered Clare; “I'm only waiting +till what is coming does come.” + +The woman cast down her eyes, and seemed lost in thought. Clare +dandled the baby gently in his arms, and talked loving nonsense to +her. + +“Well,” said the old woman, raising at length her eyes, with a look of +reverence in them, to Clare's, “I can't help you, and you want no help +of mine. I've got no money, but--” + +“I've got plenty of money, ma'am,” interrupted Clare. “I've got a +whole shilling in my pocket!” + +“Bless the holy innocent!” murmured the woman. “--Well, I can only +promise you this--that as long as I live, the baby sha'n't forget you; +and I ain't so old as I look.” + +Here the matron came up, and said he had better be going now; but if +he came back any day after a month, he should see the baby again. + +“Thank you, ma'am,” replied Clare. “Keep her a good baby, please. I +will come for her one day.” + +“Please God I live to see that day!” said the old woman. “I think I +shall.” + +She did live to see it, though I cannot tell that part of the story +now. + + + +Chapter XXXIX. + +Away. + + +So Clare went once more into the street, where Abdiel was again +watching for him, and stood on the pavement, not knowing which way to +turn. The big policeman had told him that no one there would give him +work after what had happened; and now, therefore, he was only waiting +for a direction to present itself. In a moment it occurred to him +that, having come in at one end of the town, he had better go out at +the other. He followed the suggestion, and Abdiel followed him--his +head hanging and his tail also, for the joy of recovering his master +had used up all the remnant of wag there was in his clock. He had no +more frolic or scamper in him now than when Clare first saw him. How +the poor thing had subsisted during the last few days, it were hard to +tell. It was much that he had escaped death from ill-usage. Meanest of +wretches are the boys or men that turn like grim death upon the +helpless. Except they change their way, helplessness will overtake +them like a thief, and they will look for some one to deliver them and +find none. Traitors to those whom it is their duty to protect, they +will one day find themselves in yet more pitiful plight than ever were +they. But I fear they will not believe it before their fate has them +by the throat. + +Clare saw that the dog was famished. He stopped at a butcher's and +bought him a scrap of meat for a penny. Then he had elevenpence with +which to begin the world afresh, and was not hungry. + +Out on the highway they went, in a perfect English summer day, with +all the world before them. It was not an oyster for Clare to open with +sword, pen, or _sesame_; but he might find a place on the outside of +it for all that, and a way over it into a better--one that he _could_ +open and get at the heart of. The sun shone as on the day of the +earthquake--deep in Clare's dimmest memorial cavern;--shone as if he +knew, come what might, that all was well; that if he shone his heart +out and went dark, nothing would go wrong; while, for the present, +everything depended on his shining his glorious best. + +“Come along, Abdiel,” said Clare; “we're going to see what comes +next. At the worst, you know what hunger is, doggie, and that a good +deal of it can be borne pretty well--though I'm not fond of it any +more than you, doggie! We'll not beg till we're downright forced, and +we won't steal. When that's the next thing, we'll just sit down, wag +our tails, and die.--There!” + +He gave him the last piece of his meat, and they trudged on for some +time without speaking. + +The sun was very hot, for it was past noon an hour or two, when they +came to a public-house, with a pump before it, and a trough. Clare +grew very thirsty when he saw the pump, and imagined the rush of a +thick sparkling curve from its spout. But its handle was locked with a +chain, to keep men and women from having water instead of beer. He +went with longing to the trough, but the water in it was so unclean +that, thirsty as he was, he could not look on it even as a last +resource. He walked into the house. + +“Please, ma'am,” he said to the woman at the bar, “would you allow me +to pump myself a little water to drink?” + +“You think I've got nothing to do but serve tramps with water!” she +answered, throwing back her head till her nostrils were at right +angles with the horizon. + +“I'm not a tramp, ma'am,” said Clare. + +“Show me your money, then, for a pot of beer, like other honest folk.” + +“I'm afraid I told you wrong, ma'am,” returned Clare. “I'm afraid I +_am_ a tramp after all; only _I_'m looking for work, and most tramps +ain't, I fancy.” + +“They all _say_ they are,” answered the woman. “That's your story, and +that's theirs!” + +“I've got elevenpence, ma'am; and could, I dare say, buy a pot of +beer, though I don't know the price of one; but I don't see where I'm +going to get any more money, and what we have must serve Abdiel and me +till we do.” + +“What right have _you_ to a dog, when you ain't fit to pay your penny +for a half-pint o' beer?” + +“Don't be hard on the young 'un, mis'ess; he don't look a bad sort!” + said a man who stood by with a pewter pot in his hand. + +Clare wondered why he had his cord-trousers pulled up a few inches and +tied under his knees with a string, which made little bags of them +there. He had to think for a mile after they left the public-house +before he discovered that it was to keep them from tightening on his +knees when he stooped, and so incommoding him at his work. + +“Thank you, sir,” he said. “I'm not a bad sort. I didn't know it was +any harm to ask for water. It ain't begging, is it, sir?” + +“Not as I knows on,” replied the man. “Here, take the lot!” + +He offered Clare his nearly emptied pewter. + +“No, thank you, sir,” answered Clara “I am thirsty--but not so thirsty +as to take your drink from you. I can get on to the next pump. Perhaps +that won't be chained up like a bull!” + +“Here, mis'ess!” cried the man. “This is a mate as knows a neighbour +when he sees him. I'll stand him a half-pint. There's yer money!” + +Without a word the woman flung the man's penny in the till, and drew +Clare a half-pint of porter. Clare took it eagerly, turned to the man, +said, “I thank you, sir, and wish your good health,” and drained the +pewter mug. He had never before tasted beer, or indeed any drink +stronger than tea, and he did not like it. But he thanked his +benefactor again, and went back to the trough. + +“Dogs don't drink beer,” he said to himself. “They know better!” and +lifting Abdiel he held him over the trough. Abdiel was not so +fastidious as his master, and lapped eagerly. Then they pursued their +uncertain way. + +Ready to do anything, he thought the shabbiness of his clothes would +be a greater bar to indoor than to outdoor work, and applied therefore +at every farm they came to. But he did not look so able as he was, and +boys were not much wanted. He never pitied himself, and never +entreated: to beg for work was beggary, and to beggary he would not +descend until driven by approaching death. But now and then some +tender-hearted woman, oftener one of ripe years, struck with his +look--its endurance, perhaps, or its weariness mingled with +hope--would perceive the necessity of the boy, and offer him the food +he did not ask--nor like him the less that, never doubting what came +to one was for both, he gave the first share of it to Abdiel. + + + +Chapter XL. + +Maly. + + +Travelling on in vague hope, meeting with kindness enough to keep him +alive, but getting no employment, sleeping in what shelter he could +find, and never missing the shelter he could not find, for the weather +was exceptionally warm for the warm season, he came one day to a +village where the strangest and hardest experience he ever encountered +awaited him. What part of the country he was in, or what was the name +of the village, he did not know. He seldom asked a question, seldom +uttered word beyond a polite greeting, but kept trudging on and on, as +if the goal of his expectation were ever drawing nigher. He felt no +curiosity as to the names of the places he passed through. Why should +the names of towns and villages strung on a road to nowhere in +particular, interest him? He did, however, long afterward, come to +know the name of this village, and its topographical relations: the +place itself was branded on his brain. + +He entered it in the glow of a hot noon, and had walked nearly through +it without meeting any one, for it was the dinner-hour, and savoury +odours filled the air, when a little girl came from a neat house, and +ran farther down the street. He was very tired, very dusty, had eaten +nothing that day, had begun to despair of work, and was wishing +himself clear of the houses that he might throw himself down. But +something in the look of the child made him quicken his weary step as +he followed her. He overtook her, passed her, and saw her face. +Heavens! it was Maly, grown wonderfully bigger! He turned and caught +her up in his arms. She gave a screech of terror, and he set her down +in keenest dismay. Finding that he was not going to run away with her, +she did not run farther from him than to safe parleying distance. + +“You bad boy!” she cried; “you're not to touch me! I will tell mamma!” + +“Why, Maly! don't you know me?” + +“No, I don't You are a dirty boy!” + +“But, Maly!--” + +“My name is not Maly; it's Mary; and I don't know you.” + +“Have you forgotten Clare, Maly?--Clare that used to carry you about +all day long?” + +“Yes; I have forgotten you. You're a dirty, ragged beggar-boy! You're +a bad boy! Boys with holes in their clothes are bad boys.--Nursie told +me so, and she knows everything! She told me herself she knew +everything!” + +She gave another though milder scream: involuntarily, Clare had taken +a step toward her, with his hand in his pocket, searching, as in the +old days when she cried, for something to give her. But, alas, his +pockets were now as empty as his stomach! there was _nothing_ in +them--not even a crumb saved from a scanty meal! While he was yet +searching, the little child, his heart's love--if indeed it was +she--stooped, gathered a handful of dust, and threw it at him. The big +boy burst into tears. The child mocked him for a minute, and when +Clare looked up again, drying his eyes with a rag, she was gone. + +He felt no resentment; love, old memories, his strange gentleness, and +pity for Maly and Maly's mother, saved him from it. The child was big +and plump and rosy, but oh, how fallen from his little Maly! And, her +child grown such, the mother was poor indeed, though up in the dome of +the angels! If she did not know the change in her, it was the worse, +for she could not help! Clare, like most of my readers, had not yet +learned to trust God for everything. But he was true to +Maly. Miserable over her backsliding, he said to himself that evil +counsellors were more to blame than she. + +“Did she know me at all?” he pondered; “or has she forgot me +altogether?” + +He began to doubt whether the girl was really Maly, or one very like +her. About half an hour after, he met a poor woman with a bundle on +her bowed back, who gave him a piece of bread. When he had eaten that, +he began to doubt whether he had met any little girl. He remembered +that he had often come to himself, as he wandered along the road, to +find he had been lost in fancies of old scenes or imaginary new ones; +waked up, he did not at once realize himself a poor lad on the tramp +for work he could not find: his conceptions were for a time stronger +than the things around him. He was thereupon comforted with the hope +that he had not in reality seen Maly, but had imagined the whole +affair. How was it possible, though, that he should imagine such +horrible things of his little sister? On the other hand, was it not +more possible for a fainting brain to imagine such a misery, than for +the live child to behave in such a fashion? Every day for many days he +tormented himself with like reasonings; but by degrees the occurrence, +whether fancy or fact, receded, and he grew more conscious of +tramping, tramping along. He grew also more hopeless of getting work, +but not more doubtful that everything was right. For he knew of +nothing he had done to bring these things upon him. + +His quiet content never left him. At the worst pinch of hunger and +cold, he never fell into despair. I do not know what merit he had in +this, for he was constituted more hopeful and placid than I ever knew +another. What he had merit in was, that not for a hungry boy's most +powerful temptation, something to eat, would he even imagine himself +doing what must not be done. He would not lead himself into +temptation. Thus he pleased the Power--let me rather say, ten times +more truly--the Father from whom he came. + + + +Chapter XLI. + +The caravans. + + +Within a fortnight or so after the police had dismissed him, blowing +him loose on the world like a dandelion-seed in the wind, Clare had an +adventure which not only gave him pleasure, but led to work and food +and interest in life. + +Passing one day from a cross-country road into the highway, he came +straight on the flank of a travelling menagerie. It was one of some +size, and Clare saw at a glance that its horses were in fair +condition. The front part of the little procession had already gone +by, and an elephant was passing at the moment with a caravan--of +feline creatures, as Clare afterwards learned, behind him. He drew it +with absolute ease, but his head seemed to be dragged earthward by the +weight of his trunk, as he plodded wearily along. A world of delight +woke in the heart of the boy. He had read much about strange beasts, +but had never seen one. His impulse was to run straight to the +elephant, and tell him he loved him. For he was a live beast, and +Clare loved every creature, common or strange, wild or tame, ordinary +or wonderful. But prudent thought followed, and he saw it better to +hover around, in the hope of a chance of being useful. Oh, the +treasures of wonder and knowledge on the other side of those thin +walls of wood, so slowly drawn along the dusty highway! If but for a +moment he might gaze on their living marvels! He had no money, but +things came to him without money--not so plentifully as he could +sometimes wish--but they came, and so might this! Employment among +those animals would be well worth the long hungry waiting! This might +be the very work he had been looking for without knowing it! It was +for this, perhaps, he had been kept so long waiting--till the caravans +should come along the road, and he be at the corner as they passed! He +did not know how often a man may think thus and see it come to +nothing--because there is better yet behind, for which more waiting is +wanted. + +At the end of the procession came a bear, shuffling along +uncomfortably. It went to Clare's heart to see how far from +comfortable the poor beast appeared. “What a life it would be,” he +thought, “to have all the creatures in all those caravans to make +happy! That would be a life worth living!” + +It was a worthy ambition--infinitely higher than that of boys who want +to do something great, or clever, or strong. As to those who want to +be rich--for their ambition I have an utter contempt. How gladly would +I drive that meanness out of any boy's heart! To fall in with the work +of the glad creator, and help him in it--that is the only ambition +worth having. It may not look a grand thing to do it in a caravan, but +it takes the mind of Christ to do it anywhere. + +Behind the bear, closing the procession, came a stoutish, +good-tempered-looking man, in a small spring-cart, drawn by a small +pony: he was the earthly owner of that caged life, with all its +gathered discomforts. Clare lifted his cap as he passed him--a +politeness of which the man took no notice, because the boy was +ragged. The moment he was past, Clare fell in behind as one of the +procession. He was prudent enough, however, not to go so near as to +look intrusive. + +When he had followed thus for a mile or two, he saw, by signs patent +to every wanderer, that they were coming near a town. Before reaching +it, however, they arrived at a spot where the hedges receded from the +road, leaving a little green sward on the sides of it, and there the +long line came to a halt. + +The menagerie had, the day before, been exhibited at a fair, and was +now on its way to another, to be held the next day in the town they +were approaching: they had made the halt in order to prepare their +entrance. To let a part of their treasure be seen, was the best way to +rouse desire after what was yet hidden: they were going, therefore, to +take out an animal or two more to walk in parade. Clare sat down at a +little distance, and wondered what was coming next. + +Experience of tramps had made the men suspicious, and it may be they +disliked having their proceedings watched by anybody; but, happily for +Clare, it was the master himself who came up to him, not without +something of menace in his bearing. The boy was never afraid, and hope +started up full grown as the man approached. He rose and took off his +cap--a very ready action with Clare, which sprung from pure +politeness, and from nothing either selfish or cringing. But the man +put his own interpretation on the civility. + +“What are you hanging about here for?” he said rudely. + +Now Clare had a perfect right to answer, had he so pleased, that he +was on the king's highway, where no one had a right to interfere with +him. But he had the habit--he could not help it; it was natural to +him--of thinking first of the other party's side of a question--a rare +gift, which served him better than he knew. For the other may be in +the right, and it is an ugly thing to interfere with any man's right; +while a man's own rights are never so much good to him as when he +waives them. + +“I beg your pardon, sir,” he said; “I did not understand you wished to +be alone. I never thought you would mind me. Will it be far enough if +I go just out of sight, for I am very tired? It is pleasant, besides, +to know there are friends near!” + +The man recognized in Clare the modes and speech of a gentleman; and +having, in the course of his wandering life, seen and known a good +many strange things, he suspected under the rags a history. But he was +not interested enough to stop and inquire into it. + +“Never mind,” he said, in altered tone; “I see you're after no +mischief!” and with that walked away, leaving Clare to do as he +pleased. + +A few minutes more went by. Clare sat hungry and sleepy on the grass +by the roadside. Before he knew, he was on his feet, startled by a +terrible noise. The lion had opened his great jaws, and his brown +leathery sides, working like a pair of bellows, had sent from his +throat a huge blast, half roar, half howl. When Clare came to himself +he knew, though he had never heard it before, that the fearful sound +was the voice of the lion. He did not know that all it meant was, that +his majesty had thought of his dinner. It was not indeed much more +than an audible gape. He stood for a moment, not at all terrified, but +half expecting to see a huge yellow animal burst out of one of the +caravans--he could not guess which: the roar was much too loud to +indicate one rather than another. He sat down again, but was not any +longer inclined to sleep. For a time, however, no second roar came +from the ribs of the captive monarch. + + + +Chapter XLII. + +Nimrod. + + +That there had been a fair not far off will partly account for what +follows. As Clare sat resting, which was all he could do, with sleep +fled and food nowhere, a roar of a different kind invaded his ears. It +came along the road this time, not from the caravans. He looked, and +spied what would have brought the heart into the throat of many a +grown man. Away on the road, in the direction whence the menagerie had +come, he saw a cloud of dust and a confused struggle, presently +resolved into two men, each at the end of a rope, and an animal +between them attached to the ropes by a ring in his nose. It was a +bull, in terrible excitement, bounding this way and that, dragging and +driving the men--doing his best in fact to break away, now from the +one of them, now from the other, and now from both at once. It must +have tortured him to pull those strong men by the cartilage of his +nose, but he was in too great a rage to feel it much. Every other +moment his hoofs would be higher than his head, and again hoofs and +head and horns would be scraping the ground in a fruitless rush to +send one of his tormentors into space beyond the ken of bulls. With +swift divergence, like a scenting hound, he twisted and shot his huge +body. The question between men and bull seemed one of endurance. + +The pale-faced boy, though full of interest in the strife, yet having +had no food that day, was not in sufficient spirits to run and meet +the animal whirlwind, so as to watch closer its chances; but the +struggle came at length near enough for him to follow almost every +detail of it: he could see the bloody foam drip from the poor beast's +nostrils. When about fifty yards away, the bull, by a sudden twist, +wrenched the rope from the hands of one of the men. He fell on his +back. The other dropped his rope and fled. The bull came scouring down +the highway. + +A second roar, as of muffled thunder, issued from the leathery flanks +of the lion. The bull made a sudden stop, scoring up the ground with +his hoofs. It seemed as if in full career he started back. Then down +went his head, and like a black flash, its accompanying thunder a +bellow of defiant contempt and wrath, he charged one of the +caravans. He had taken the hungry lion's roar for a challenge to +combat. It was nothing to the bull that the voice was that of an +unknown monster; he was ready for whatever the monster might prove. + +The men busy about the caravans and wagons, caught sight of him +coming, and in the first moment of terror at a beast to which they +were not accustomed, bolted for refuge behind or upon them: they would +sooner have encountered their tiger broke loose. The same moment, with +astounding shock, the head of the bull went crack against the near +hind-wheel of the caravan in whose shafts stood the elephant, +patiently waiting orders. The bull had not caught sight of the +elephant, or he would doubtless have “gone for” him, not the +caravan. His ear, finer than Clare's, must have distinguished whence +the roar proceeded: in that caravan, sure enough, was the lion, with +the rest of the great cats. He answered the blow of the bull's head +with a roar thunderously different from his late sleepy leonine +sigh. It roused every creature in the menagerie. From the greatest to +the smallest each took up its cry. Out burst a tornado of terrific +sound, filling with horror the quiet noontide. The roaring and yelling +of lion, tiger, and leopard, the laughter of hyena, the howling of +jackal, and the snarling of bear, mingled in hideous dissonance with +the cries of monkeys and parrots; while certain strange gurgles made +Clare's heart, lover of animals though he was, quiver, and his blood +creep. The same instant, however, he woke to the sense that he might +do something: he ran to the caravans. + +By this time the men, master and all, fully roused to the far worse +that might follow the attack of the bull, had caught up what weapons +were at hand, and rushed to repel the animal For more than one or two +of them it might have proved a fatal encounter, but that the enraged +beast had entangled his horns in the spokes and rim of the wheel. In +terror of what might be approaching him from behind, he was struggling +wildly to extricate them. Peril upon peril! What if in the contortions +of his mighty muscles he pulled off the wheel, and the carriage +toppled over, every cage in it so twisted and wrenched that the +bearings of its iron bars gave way! The results were too terrible to +ponder! This way and that, and every way at once, he was writhing and +pushing and prising and dragging. The elephant turned the shafts +slowly round to see what was the matter behind. If the bull and the +elephant yoked to the caravan came to loggerheads, ruin was +inevitable. The master thought whether he had not better loose the +elephant while the bull was yet entangled by the horns. With one blow +of his trunk he would break the ruffian's back and end the affray! It +were good even, if one knew how, to loose the wicked-looking horns: +the brute's struggles to free them were more dangerous far than could +be the horns themselves! + +While he hesitated, Clare came running up, with Abdiel at his heels +ready as any hornet to fly at bull or elephant, let his master only +speak the word. But the moment Clare saw how the bull's horns were +mixed up with the spokes and fellies of the wheel, a glad suspicion +flashed across him: that was old Nimrod's way! could it be Nimrod +himself? If it were, the trouble was as good as over! The suspicion +became a certainty the instant it woke. But never could Clare +altogether forgive himself for not at first sight recognizing his old +friend. I believe myself that hunger was to blame, and not Clare. + +The men stood about the animal, uncertain what to do, as he struggled +with his horns, and heaved and tore at the wheel to get them out of +it, the roars and howls and inarticulate curses going on all the +time. The elephant must have been tired, to stand so and do nothing! +For a moment Clare could not get near enough. He was afraid to call +him while the bull could not see him: Nimrod might but struggle the +more, in order to get to him! + +Up rushed a fellow, white with rage and running, bang into the middle +of the spectators, and shook the knot of them asunder. It was one of +the two men from whom Nimrod had broken. He had a pitchfork in his +hands which he proceeded to level. Clare flung his weight against him, +threw up his fork, shoved him aside, and got close to the maddened +animal. It was his past come again! How often had he not interfered to +protect Nimrod--and his would-be masters also! With instinctive, +unconscious authority, he held up his hand to the little crowd. + +“Leave him alone,” he cried. “I know him; I can manage him! Please do +not interfere. He is an old friend of mine.” + +They saw that the bull was already still: he had recognized the boy's +voice! They kept his furious attendant back, and looked on in anxious +hope while Clare went up to the animal. + +“Nimrod!” he whispered, laying a hand on one of the creature's horns, +and his cheek against his neck. + +Nimrod stood like a bull in bronze. + +“I'm going to get your horns out, Nimrod,” murmured Clare, and laid +hold of the other with a firm grasp. “You must let me do as I like, +you know, Nimrod!” + +His voice evidently soothed the bull. + +By the horns Clare turned his head now one way, now another, Nimrod +not once resisting push or pull. In a moment more he would have them +clear, for one of them was already free. Holding on to the latter, +Clare turned to the bystanders. + +“You mustn't touch him,” he said, “or I won't answer for him. And you +mustn't let either of those men there”--for the second of Nimrod's +attendants had by this time come up--“interfere with him or me. They +let him go because they couldn't manage him. He can't bear them; and +if he were to break loose from them again, it might be quite another +affair! Then he might distrust me!” + +The menagerie men turned, and looking saw that the man with the +pitchfork had revenge in his heart. They gave him to understand that +he must mind what he was about, or it would be the worse for him. The +man scowled and said nothing. + +Clare gently released the other horn, but kept his hold of the first, +moving the creature's head by it, this way and that. A moment more and +he turned his face to the company, which had scattered a little. When +the inflamed eyes of Nimrod came into view, they scattered wider. +Clare still made the bull feel his hand on his horn, and kept speaking +to him gently and lovingly. Nimrod eyed his enemies, for such plainly +he counted them, as if he wished he were a lion that he might eat as +well as kill them. At the same time he seemed to regard them with +triumph, saying in his big heart, “Ha! ha! you did not know what a +friend I had! Here he is, come in the nick of time! I thought he +would!” Clare proceeded to untie the ropes from the ring in his +nose. The man with the pitchfork interfered. + +“That wonnot do!” he said, and laid his hand on Clare's arm. “Would +you send him ramping over the country, and never a hold to have on +him?” + +“It wasn't much good when you had a hold on him--was it now?” returned +the boy. “Where do you want to take him?” + +“That's my business,” answered the man sulkily. + +“I fancy you'll find it's mine!” returned Clare. “But there he is! +Take him.” + +The man hesitated. + +“Then leave me to manage him,” said Clare. + +A murmur of approbation arose. The caravan people felt he knew what he +was saying. They believed he had power with the bull. + +While yet he was untying the first of the ropes from the animal's +bleeding nostrils, Clare's fingers all at once refused further +obedience, his eyes grew dim, and he fell senseless at the bull's +feet. + +“Don't tell Nimrod!” he murmured as he fell. + +“Oh, that explains it!” cried the man with the pitchfork to his +mate. “He knows the cursed brute!” For Clare had hitherto spoken his +name to the bull as if it were a secret between them. + +Neither had the sense to perceive that the explanation lay in the +bull's knowing Clare, not in Clare's knowing the bull. They made haste +to lay hold of the ropes. Nimrod stood motionless, looking down on his +friend, now and then snuffing at the pale face, which the +thorough-bred mongrel, Abdiel, kept licking continuously. Noses of +bull and dog met without offence on the loved human countenance. But +had the men let the bull feel the ropes, that moment he would have +been raging like a demon. + +The men of the caravan, admiring both Clare's influence over the +animal and his management of him, grateful also for what he had done +for them, hastened to his help. When they had got him to take a little +brandy, he sat up with a wan smile, but presently fell sideways on his +elbow, and so to the ground again. + +“It's nothing,” he murmured; “it's only I'm rather hungry.” + +“Poor boy!” said a woman, who had followed her brandy from the +house-caravan, afraid it might disappear in occult directions, “when +did you have your last feed?” + +She stood looking down on the white face, almost between the fore-feet +of the bull. + +“I had a piece of bread yesterday afternoon, ma'am,” faltered Clare, +trying to look up at her. + +“Bless my soul!” she cried, “who's been a murderin' of you, child?” + +She thought he was in company with the two men; and they had been +ill-treating him. + +“I can't get any work, ma'am, so I don't want much to eat. Now I think +of it, I believe it was the gladness of seeing an old friend again, +and not the hunger, that made me feel so queer all at once.” + +“Where's your friend?” she asked, looking round the assembly. + +“There he is!” answered Clare, putting up his hand, and stroking the +big nose that was right over his face. + +“Couldn't you rise now?” said the woman, after a moment's silent +regard of him. + +“I'll try, ma'am; I don't feel quite sure.” + +“I want you to come into the house, and have a good square meal.” + +“If you would be so kind, ma'am, as let me have a bit of bread here! +Nimrod would not like me to leave him. He loves me, ma'am, and if I +went away, he might be troublesome. Those men will never do anything +with him: he doesn't like them! They've been rough to him, I don't +doubt. Not that I wonder at that, for he is a terrible beast to most +people. They used to say he never was good with anybody but me. I +suppose he knew I cared for him!” + +His eyes closed again. The woman made haste to get him something. In a +few minutes she returned with a basin of broth. He took it eagerly, +but with a look of gratitude that went to her heart Before he tasted +it, however, he set it on the ground, broke in half the great piece of +bread she had brought with it, and gave the larger part to his +dog. Then he ate the other with his broth, and felt better than for +many a day. Some of the men said he could not be very hungry to give a +cur like that so much of his dinner; but the evil thought did not +enter the mind of the woman. + +“You'd better be taking your beast away,” said the woman, who by this +time understood the affair, to the two men. + +They were silent, evidently disinclined for such another tussle. + +“You'd better be going,” she said again. “If anything should happen +with that animal of yours, and one of ours was to get loose, the devil +would be to pay, and who'd do it?” + +“They'd better wait for me, ma'am,” said Clare, rising. “I'm just +ready!--They won't tell me where they want to take him, but it's all +one, so long as I'm with him. He's my friend!--Ain't you, Nimrod? +We'll go together--won't we, Nimrod?” + +While he spoke, he undid the ropes from the ring in the bull's +nose. Gathering them up, he handed them politely to one of the men, +and the next moment sprang upon the bull's back, just behind his +shoulders, and leaning forward, stroked his horns and neck. + +“Give me up the dog, please,” he said. + +The owner of the menagerie himself did as Clare requested. All stood +and stared, half expecting to see him flung from the creature's back, +and trampled under his hoofs. Even Nimrod, however, would not easily +have unseated Clare, who could ride anything he had ever tried, and +had tried everything strong enough to carry him, from a pig +upward. But Nimrod was far from wishing to unseat his friend, who with +hands and legs began to send him toward the road. + +“Are you going that way?” he asked, pointing. The men answered him +with a nod, sulky still. + +“Don't go with those men,” said the woman, coming up to the side of +the bull, and speaking in a low voice. “I don't like the look of +them.” + +“Nimrod will be on my side, ma'am,” answered Clare. “They would never +have got him home without me. They don't understand their +fellow-creatures.” + +“I'm afraid you understand your fellow-creatures, as you call them, +better than you do your own kind!” + +“I think they are my own kind, ma'am. That is how they know me, and do +what I want them to do.” + +“Stay with us,” said the woman coaxingly, still speaking low. “You'll +have plenty of your fellow-creatures about you then!” + +“Thank you, ma'am, a thousand times!” answered Clare, his face +beaming; “but I couldn't leave poor Nimrod to do those men a mischief, +and be killed for it!” + +“You'd have plenty to eat and drink, and som'at for your pocket!” + persisted the woman. + +“I know I should have everything I wanted!” answered Clare, “and I'm +very thankful to you, ma'am. But you see there's always something, +somehow, that's got to be done before the other thing!” + +Here the master came up. He had himself been thinking the boy would be +a great acquisition, and guessed what his wife was about; but he was +afraid she might promise too much for services that ought to be had +cheap. Few scruple to take advantage of the misfortune of another to +get his service cheap. It is the economy of hell. + +“I sha'n't feel safe till that bull of yours is a mile off!” he said. + +“Come along, Nimrod!” answered Clare, always ready with the responsive +deed. + +Away went Nimrod, gentle as a lamb. + + + +Chapter XLIII. + +Across country. + + +The two men came after at their ease. No sooner was Nimrod on the +road, however, than he began to quicken his pace. He quickened it +fast, and within a minute or so was trotting swiftly along. The men +ran panting and shouting behind. The more they shouted, the faster +Nimrod went. Ere long he was out of their sight, though Clare could +hear them cursing and calling for a time. + +He had endeavoured to stop Nimrod, but the bull seemed to have made up +his mind that he had obeyed enough for one day. He did not heed a word +Clare said to him, but kept on and on at a swinging trot. Clare would +have jumped off had he been sure the proceeding would stop him; but, +now that he would not obey him, he feared lest, in doing so, he might +let him loose on the country, when there was no saying what mischief +he might not work. On the other hand, he felt sure that he could +restrain him from violence, though he might not prevent his +frolicking. He must therefore keep his seat. + +For a few miles Nimrod was content with the highway, now trotting +beautifully, now breaking into a canter. But all at once he turned at +right angles in the middle of the road, cleared the skirting fence +like a hunter, and took a bee-line across the fields. Compelled +sometimes to abandon it, he showed great judgment in choosing the +place at which to get out of the enclosure, or cross the natural +obstruction. On and on he went, over hedge after hedge, through field +after field, until Clare began to wonder where all the people in the +world had got to. Then a strange feeling gradually came over +him. Surely at some time or other he had seen the meadow he was +crossing! Was he asleep, and dreaming the jolly ride he was having on +Nimrod's back? What a strong creature Nimrod was! Would he never be +tired? How oddly he felt! Were his senses going from him? It was like +the strangest mixture of a bad dream and a good! + +There seemed at length no further room for doubt or +mistake. Everything was in its place! It was plain why Nimrod was so +obstinate! The dear old fellow was carrying him back to where they had +been together so many happy days! They were nigh Mr. Goodenough's +farm, and making straight for it! How strange it was! he had felt +himself a measureless distance from it! But in his wandering he had +taken many turns he did not heed, and Nimrod had come the shortest +way. Delight filled his heart at the thought of seeing once more the +places where his father and mother seemed yet to live. But instantly +came the thought of Maly, and drowned the other thought in +bitterness. Then he felt how worthless place is, when those who made +it dear are gone. Father and mother are home--not the house we were +born in! + +They were soon upon the farm where once he had abundance of labour, +abundance to eat, and abundance of lowly friendship. Nimrod was making +for his old stable. He was weary now, and breathing heavily, though +not at all spent. Was he dreaming of a golden age, in which Clare +should be ever at his beck and call? + +Clare had little inclination to encounter any of the people of the +farm. He would indeed have been glad, from a little way off, to get a +sight of his once friend and master, the farmer himself; and very +gladly would he have gone into the stable in the hope of a greeting +from old Jonathan; but he would not willingly meet “the mistress!” + Nimrod should take him to his old stall; there he would tie him up, +and flee from the place! The evening was now come, and in the dusk he +would escape unseen. + +When they reached Nimrod's door, they found it closed; and Clare, +stiff enough by this time, slipped off to open it. Nimrod began to paw +the stones, and blow angry puffs from his wounded nose. When Clare got +the door open, he saw, to his confusion, a vague dark bulk, another +bull, in Nimrod's stall! The roar that simultaneously burst from each +was ferocious, and down went Nimrod's head to charge. It was a +terrible moment for Clare: the new bull was fast by the head, and, +unable to turn it to his adversary, would be gored to death almost in +a moment! He could not let Nimrod be guilty of such unfairness! And +the mistress would think he had brought him back for the very purpose! +He all but jumped on the horns of his friend, making him yield just +ground enough for the shutting of the door. He knew well, however, +that not three such doors in one would keep Nimrod from an enemy. With +his back to it he stood facing him and talking to him, and all the +while they heard the bull inside struggling to get free. He stood +between two horned rages, only a chain and a plank betwixt him and the +one at his back, with which he had no influence. A coward would have +escaped, and left the two bullies to settle between them which had the +better right to the stall--not without blood, almost as certainly not +without loss of life, perhaps human as well as bovine. But Clare was +made of other stuff. + +Before he could get Nimrod away, the bellowing brought out the +farmer. All his men had gone to the village; only himself and his wife +were at home. + +“What's got the brute?” he cried on the threshold, but instantly began +to run, for he saw through the gathering darkness a darker shape he +knew, roaring and pawing at the door of his old quarters, and a boy +standing between him and it, with marvellous courage in mortal danger. +He understood at once that Nimrod had broken loose and come back. But +when he came near enough to recognize Clare, astonishment, and +something more sacred than astonishment, held him dumb. Ever since the +unjust blow that sent the boy from him, his heart had been aware of a +little hollow of remorse in it. Now all his former relations with him +while his adoptive father yet lived, came back upon him. He remembered +him dressed like the little gentleman he always was--and there he +stood, the same gentle fearless creature, in absolute rags! If his +wife saw him! The farmer had no fear of Nimrod in his worst rages, but +he feared his wife in her gentlest moods. Happily for both, a critical +moment in the cooking of the supper had arrived. + +“Clare!” he stammered. + +“Yes, sir,” returned Clare, and laid hold of Nimrod's horn. The animal +yielded, and turned away with him. The farmer came nearer, and put his +arm round the boy's neck. The boy rubbed his cheek against the arm. + +“I'm sorry I struck you, Clare!” faltered the big man. + +“Oh, never mind, sir! That was long ago!” answered the boy. + +“Tell me how you've been getting on.” + +“Pretty well, sir! But I want to tell you first how it is I'm here +with Nimrod. Only it would be better to put him somewhere before I +begin.” + +“It would,” agreed the farmer; and between them, with the enticements +of a pail of water and some fresh-cut grass, they got him into a shed, +where they hoped he would forget the proximity of the usurper, and, +with the soothing help of his supper, go to sleep. + +Then Clare told his story. Mr Goodenough afterward asseverated that, +if he had not known him for a boy that would not lie, he would not +have believed the half of it. + +“Come, Abdiel!” said Clare, the moment he ended--and would have +started at once. + +“Won't you have something after your long ride?” said the farmer. + +Clare looked down at his clothes, and laughed. The farmer knew what he +meant, and did not ask him into the house. + +“When had you anything to eat?” he inquired. + +“I shall do very well till to-morrow,” answered Clare. + +“Then if you will go, I'm glad of the opportunity of paying you the +wages I owed you,” said the farmer, putting his hand in his pocket. + +“You gave me my food! That was all I was worth!” protested Clare. + +“You were worth more than that! I knew the difference when I had +another boy in your place! I wish I had you again!--But it wouldn't +do, you know! it wouldn't do!” he added hastily. + +With that he succeeded in pulling a sovereign from the depth of a +trowser-pocket, and held it out to Clare. It was neither large wages +nor a greatly generous gift, but it seemed to the boy wealth +enormous. He could not help holding out his hand, but he was ashamed +to open it. What the giver regarded as a debt, the receiver regarded +as a gift. He stood with his hand out but clenched. There was a combat +inside him. + +“It's too much!” he protested, looking at the sovereign almost with +fear. “I never had so much money in my life!” + +“You earned it well,” said the farmer magnanimously. + +The moral cramp forsook his hand. He took the money with a hearty +“Thank you, sir.” As he put it in his pocket, he felt its corners +carefully, lest there should be a hole. But his pockets had not had +half the wear of the clothes they inhabited. + +“Where are you going?” asked the farmer. + +Clare mentioned the small town in whose neighbourhood he had left the +caravans, and said he thought the people of the menagerie would like +him to help them with the beasts. The farmer shook his head. + +“It's not a respectable occupation!” he remarked. + +Clare did not understand him. + +“Do they cheat?” he asked. + +“No; I don't suppose they cheat worse than anybody else. But it ain't +respectable.” + +Had he known a little more, Clare might have asserted that the men +about the menagerie were at least as respectable as almost any farmer +with a horse to sell. But he knew next to nothing of wickedness, +whence many a man whose skull he had brains enough to fill three +times, regarded him as a simpleton. + +Clare thought everything honest honourable. When people said +otherwise, he did not understand, and continued to act according as he +understood. A thousand dishonourable things are done, and largely +approved, which Clare would not have touched with one of his fingers: +he could see nothing more dishonourable in having to do with wild +beasts than in having to do with tame ones. If any boy wants to know +the sort of thing I count in that thousand, I answer him--“The next +thing you are asked to do, or are inclined to do--if you have any +doubt about it, DON'T DO IT.” That is the way to know the honourable +thing from the dishonourable. + +Clare made no attempt to argue the question with the farmer. He +inquired of him the nearest way to the town, and went--the quicker +that he heard the voice of Mrs. Goodenough, calling her husband to +supper. + + + +Chapter XLIV. + +A third mother. + + +Who ever had a sovereign for the first time in his life, and did not +feel rich? Clare trudged along merrily, and Abdiel shared his +joy. They had to sleep out of doors nevertheless; for by this time +Clare knew that a boy, especially a boy in rags, must mind whom he +asks to change a sovereign. In the lee of a hay-mow, on a little loose +hay, they slept, Abdiel in Clare's bosom, and slept well. + +There was not much temptation to lie long after waking, and the +companions were early on their way. It was yet morning when they came +to the public house where Clare had his first and last half-pint of +beer. The landlady stood at the newly opened door, with her fists in +her sides, looking out on the fresh world, lost in some such thought +as was possible to her. Clare pulled off his cap, and bade her good +morning as he passed. Perhaps she knew she did not deserve politeness; +anyhow she took Clare's for impudence, and came swooping upon him. He +stopped and waited her approach, perplexed as to the cause of it; and +was so unprepared for the box on the ear she dealt him, that it almost +threw him down. Her ankle was instantly in Abdiel's sharp teeth. She +gave a frightful screech, and Clare, coming to himself, though still +stupid from her blow and his own surprise, called off the dog. The +woman limped raging to the house, and Clare thought it prudent to go +his way. He talked severely to Abdiel as they went; but though the dog +could understand much, I doubt if he understood that lecture. For +Abdiel was one of the few, even among dogs, with whom the defence of +master or friend is an inborn, instinctive duty; and strong temptation +even has but a poor chance against the sense of duty in a dog. + +It was night when they entered the town. They were already a weary +pair when the far sounds of the brass band of the menagerie, mostly +made up of attendants on the animals, first entered their ears. The +marketing was over; the band was issuing its last invitation to the +merry-makers to walk up and see strange sights; its notes were just +dying to their close, when the wayfarers arrived at the foot of the +steps leading to the platform where the musicians stood. Clare +ascended, and Abdiel crept after him. + +At a table in a small curtained recess on the platform, sat the +mistress to receive the money of those that entered. Clare laid his +sovereign before her. She took it up without looking at him, but at it +she looked doubtfully. She threw it on her table. It would not ring. +She bit it with her white teeth, and looked at it again; then at +length gave a glance at the person who offered it. Her dull lamp +flickered in the puffs of the night-wind, and she did not recognize +Clare. She saw but a white-faced, ragged boy, and threw him back his +sovereign. + +“Won't pass,” she said with decision, not unmingled with contempt. She +sat at the receipt of money, where too many men and women cease to be +ladies and gentlemen. + +Clare did not at first understand. He stood motionless and, for the +second time that day, bewildered. How could money be no money? + +“'Ain't you got sixpence?” she asked. + +“No, ma'am,” answered Clare. “I haven't had sixpence for many a day.” + +The moment he spoke, the woman looked him sharply in the face, and +knew him. + +“Drat my stupid eyes!” she said fervently. “That I shouldn't ha' known +you! Walk in, walk in. Go where you please, and do as you +please. You're right welcome.--Where did you get that sov.?” + +“From Farmer Goodenough.” + +“Good enough, I hope, not to take advantage of an innocent prince! Was +it for taking home the bull?” + +“No, ma'am. I didn't take the bull home. The bull took me to the old +home where we used to be together. He didn't want a new one!” + +“Well, never mind now. Give me the sovereign. I'll talk to you by and +by. Go in, or the show 'ill be over. Look after your dog, though. We +don't like dogs. He mustn't go in.” + +“I'll send him right outside, if you wish it, ma'am.” + +“I do.--But will he stay out?” + +“He will, ma'am.” + +Clare took up Abdiel, and setting him at the top of the steps, told +him to go down and wait. Abdiel went hopping down, like a dirty little +white cataract out on its own hook, turned in under the steps, and +deposited himself there until his master should call him. + + + +Chapter XLV. + +The menagerie. + + +A strange smell was in Clare's nostrils, and as he went down the steps +inside, it grew stronger. He did not dislike it; but it set him +thinking why it should so differ from that of domestic animals. He was +presently in the midst of a vision attractive to all boys, but which +few had ever looked upon with such intelligent wonder as he; for Clare +had read and re-read every book about animals upon which he could lay +his hands. He had a great power too of remembering what he read; for +he never let a description glide away over the outside of his eyes, +but always put it inside his thinking place. What with pictures and +descriptions, he seemed to know, as he looked around him, every animal +on which his eyes fell. + +The area was by no means crowded. There had been many visitors during +the day, but now it was late. He could see into all the cages that +formed the sides of the enclosure. Many of the creatures seemed +restless, few sleepy: night was the waking time for most of them. How +should a great roaming, hunting cat go to sleep in a little cube of +darkness! “Oh,” thought Clare, “how gladly would I help them to bear +it! I could bear it myself with somebody near to be kind to me!” + +He had begun to feel that the quiet happiness to which he was once so +accustomed that he did not think much about it, was his because it was +_given_ him. He had begun to see that it did not come to him of +itself, but from the love of his father and mother. He had yet to +learn that it was given to them to give to him by the Father of +fathers and mothers. But he was beginning to prize every least +kindness shown him. This re-acted on his desire to make the happiness +greater and the pain less everywhere about him. He had little chance +of doing much for people, he thought; but he knew how to do things for +some animals, and perhaps it was only necessary to know others to be +able to do something for them too! + +Thoughts like these passing through his mind, and his gaze wandering +hither and thither over the shifting shapes, his eyes rested on the +tenant of one of the cages, and his heart immediately grew very sore, +for he seemed unable to lift his head. He was a big animal, alone in +his prison, of a blackish colour, and awkward appearance. He went +nearer, and found he had a big ring in his nose like Nimrod. But to +the ring was fastened a strong chain, and the chain was bolted down to +the floor of the cage, which was of iron covered with boards, in their +turn covered with a thick sheet of lead. The chain was so short that +it held the poor creature's head within about a foot of the floor. He +could not lift it higher, or move it farther on either side; but he +kept moving it constantly. It was a pitiful sight, and Clare went +nearer still, drawn far more by compassion, and indeed sympathy, than +by curiosity. He was a terrible brute, a big grizzly bear, ugly to +repulsiveness. The snarling scorn, the sneering, lip-writhing hate of +the demoniacal grin with which he received the boy, was hideous; the +rattling, pebble-jarring growl that came from his devilish throat was +loathing embodied. What if spirits worse than their own get into some +of the creatures by virtue of the likeness between them! One day will +be written, perhaps, a history of animals very different from any +attempted by mere master in zoology. Clare spoke to the beast again +and again, but was unvaryingly answered by the same odious snarl, +curling his lip under his nose-ring. It seemed to express the imagined +delight of tearing him limb from limb. + +“Poor fellow!” said Clare, “how can he be good-tempered with that +torturing ring and chain! His unalterable position must make his every +bone ache!” + +But had his nose been set free, such a raging-bear-struggle to get at +the nearest of his fellow-prisoners would have ensued, as must soon +have torn to shreds the partition between them. For he was a +beast-bedlamite, an animal volcano, a furnace of death, an incarnate +paroxysm of wrath. The inspiration of the creature, so far as one +could see, was pure hate. + +The boy turned aside with quivering heart--sore for the grizzly's +nose, and sorer still for the grizzly himself that he was so +unfriendly. + +Right opposite, a creature of a far differing disposition seemed +casting defiance to all the ills of life. As he turned with a sad +despair from the grizzly, Clare caught sight of his pranks, and +hastened across the area. The creature kept bounding from side to side +of his cage, agile and frolicsome as a kitten. But the light was poor, +and Clare could not even conjecture to which of the cat-kinds he +belonged. When he came near his cage, he saw that he was yellowish +like a lion, and thought perhaps he might be a young lion. He had no +mane. Clare judged him four feet in length without the tail--or +perhaps four and a half. A little way off was the real lion--a young +one, it is true, but quite grown, with a thin ruffy mane, and lordly +carriage and gaze. It was he whose roar had challenged Nimrod, giving +the topmost flutter to the flame of his wrath. But Clare was so taken +with the frolicsome creature before him, that he gave but a glance at +the grand one as he walked up and down his prison, and turned again to +the merry one disporting himself alone, who seemed to find the +pleasure of life in great games with companions no one saw but +himself. For minutes he stood regarding the gladness of God's +creature. A wild thing of the woods and plains, he made the most of +the bars and floor and roof of his cage. No one careless of liberty +could make such bounds as those; yet he was joyous in closest +imprisonment! His liberty gone, his freedom contracted to a few cubic +feet, his space diminished almost to the mould of his body, the great +wild philosopher created his own liberty, made it out of his own love +of it. Like a live, erratic shuttle he went to and fro, unweaving, +unravelling, unwinding, drawing out the knot of confinement, flinging +out, radiating and spreading and breathing out space in all +directions, by multitudinous motion of disentanglement! Space gone +from him, space in the abstract should replace it! He would not be +slave to condition! Space unconditioned should be his! For him liberty +should not lie in space, but in his own soul. Room should be but the +poor out-aide symbol of his inward freedom! He would spin out, he +would weave, he would unroll essential liberty into spiritual space! +His mind to him a kingdom was. Not a grumble, not a snarl! He left +discontent to men, to build their own prisons withal. A proud man with +everything he longs for, if such a man there be, is but a slave; this +creature of the glad creator was and would be free, because he was a +free soul. Prison bars could not touch that by whose virtue he was and +would be free! + +The germ of this thinking was in the mind of Clare while he stood and +gazed; and as he told me the story, its ripeness came thus, or nearly +thus, from his lips; for he had thought much in lonely places. + +As he gazed and sympathized, there awoke within him that strange +consciousness which my reader must, at one time or another, have +known--of being on the point of remembering something. It was not a +memory that came, but a memory of a memory--the shadow of a memory +gone, but trying to come out from behind a veil--a sense of having +once known something. It gave another aspect to the blessed creature +before him. The creature and himself seemed for a moment to belong +together to another time. Could he have seen such an animal before? He +did not think so! He could never have visited a menagerie and +forgotten it! If he had known such a creature, his after-reading would +have recalled it, he would know it now! He could tell the lion and the +tiger and the leopard, although he seemed to know he had never seen +one of them; he could not tell this animal, and yet--and yet!--what +was it? The feeling itself lasted scarce an instant, and went no +farther. No memory came to him. The foiled expectation was all he +had. The very reasoning about it helped to obliterate the shape of the +feeling itself. He could not even recall how the thing had felt; he +could only remember it had been there. It was now but the shadow of +the shadow of a dream--a yet vaguer memory than that thinnest of +presences which had at the first tantalized him. We remember what we +cannot recall. + +Perhaps the rousing of the odd, fantastic feeling had been favoured by +the slumber beginning to encroach on tody and brain. While he stood +looking at the one creature, all the wonderful creatures began to get +mixed up together, and he thought it better to go and search for some +field of sleep, where he might mow a little for his use. He said +good-night to the great, gentle, jubilant cat, turned from him +unwillingly, and went up the steps. Almost every spectator was +gone. At the top of them he turned for a last look, but could +distinguish nothing except the dim form of the young lion, as he +thought him, still gamboling in the presence of his maker. + +He thought to see the mistress of the menagerie, but she was no longer +in her curtained box. He went out on the deserted platform, and down +the steps. Abdiel was already at the foot when he reached it, wagging +his weary little tail. + +They set out to look for a shelter. Their search, however, was so much +in vain, that at last they returned and lay down under one of the +wagons, on the hard ground of the public square. Sleeping so often out +of doors, he had never yet taken cold. + + + +Chapter XLVI. + +The angel of the wild beasts. + + +When Clare looked up he saw nothing between him and the sky. They had +dragged the caravan from above him, and he had not moved. Abdiel +indeed waked at the first pull, but had lain as still as a +mouse--ready to rouse his master, but not an instant before it should +be necessary. + +Clare saw the sky, but he saw something else over him, better than the +sky--the face of Mrs. Halliwell, the mistress of the menagerie. In it, +as she stood looking down on him, was compassion, mingled with +self-reproach. + +Clare jumped up, saying, “Good morning, ma'am!” He was yet but half +awake, and staggered with sleep. + +“My poor boy!” answered the woman, “I sent you to sleep on the cold +earth, with a sovereign of your own in my pocket! I made sure you +would come and ask me for it! You're too innocent to go about the +world without a mother!” + +She turned her face away. + +“But, ma'am, you know I couldn't have offered it to anybody,” said +Clare. “It wasn't good!--Besides, before I knew that,” he went on, +finding she did not reply, “there was nobody but you I dared offer it +to: they would have said I stole it--because I'm so shabby!” he added, +looking down at his rags. “But it ain't in the clothes, ma'am--is it?” + +Getting the better of her feelings for a moment, she turned her face +and said,-- + +“It was all my fault! The sov. is a good one. It's only cracked! I +ought to have known, and changed it for you. Then all would have been +well!” + +“I don't think it would have made any difference, ma'am. We would +rather sleep on the ground than in a bed that mightn't be +clean--wouldn't we, Abby?” The dog gave a short little bark, as he +always did when his master addressed him by his name.--“But I'm so +glad!” Clare went on. “I was sure Mr. Goodenough thought the sovereign +all right when he gave it me!--Were you ever disappointed in a +sovereign, ma'am?” + +“I been oftener disappointed in them as owed 'em!” she answered. “But +to think o' me snug in bed, an' you sleepin' out i' the dark night! I +can't abide the thought on it!” + +“Don't let it trouble you, ma'am; we're used to it. Ain't we, Abby?” + +“Then you oughtn't to be! and, please God, you shall be no more! But +come along and have your breakfast We don't start till the last.” + +“Please, ma'am, may Abdiel come too?” + +“In course! 'Love me, love my dog!' Ain't that right?” + +“Yes, ma'am; but some people like dogs worse than boys.” + +“A good deal depends on the dog. When folk brings up their dogs as bad +as they do their childern, I want neither about me. But your dog's a +well-behaved dog. Still, he must learn not to come in sight o' the +animals.” + +“He will learn, ma'am!--Abdiel, lie down, and don't come till I call +you.” + +At the word, the dog dropped, and lay. + +The house-caravan stood a little way off, drawn aside when they began +to break up. They ascended its steps behind, and entered an enchanting +little room. It had muslin curtains to the windows, and a small stove +in which you could see the bright red coals. On the stove stood a +coffee-pot and a covered dish. How nice and warm the place felt, after +the nearly shelterless night! + +The breakfast-things were still on the table. Mr. Halliwell had had +his breakfast, but Mrs. Halliwell would not eat until she had found +the boy. She had been unhappy about him all the night. Her husband had +assured her the sovereign was a good one, and the boy had told her he +had no money but the sovereign! She little knew how seldom he fared +better than that same night! When he got among hay or straw, that was +luxury. + +They sat down to breakfast, and the good woman was very soon confirmed +in the notion that the boy was a gentleman. + +“Call your dog now,” she said, “an' let's see if he'll come!” + +“May I whistle, ma'am?” + +“Why not!--But will he hear you?” + +“He has very sharp ears, ma'am.” + +Clare gave a low, peculiar whistle. In a second or two, they heard an +anxious little whine at the door. Clare made haste to open it. There +stood Abdiel, with the words in his eyes, as plain almost as if he +spoke them--“Did you call, sir?” The woman caught him and held him to +her bosom. + +“You blessed little thing!” she said. + +And surely if there be a blessing to be had, it is for them that obey. + +Clare heard and felt the horses put-to, but the hostess of this +Scythian house did not rise, and he too went on with his +breakfast. When they were in motion, it was not so easy to eat nicely, +but he managed very well. By the time he had done, they had left the +town behind them. He wanted to help Mrs. Halliwell with the +breakfast-things, but whether she feared he would break some of them, +or did not think it masculine work, she would not allow him. + +Nothing had been said about his going with them; she had taken that +for granted. Clare began to think perhaps he ought to take his leave: +there was nothing for him to do! He and Abdiel ought at least to get +out and walk, instead of burdening the poor horses with their weight, +when they were so well rested, and had had such a good breakfast! But +when he said so to Mrs. Halliwell, she told him she must have a little +talk with him first, and formally proposed that he should enter their +service, and do whatever he was fit for in the menagerie. + +“You're not frightened of the beasts, are you?” she said. + +“Oh no, ma'am; I love them!” answered Clare. “But are you sure +Mr. Halliwell thinks I could be of use?” + +“Don't you think yourself you could?” asked Mrs. Halliwell. + +“I know I could, ma'am; but I should not like him to take me just +because he was sorry for me!” + +“You innocent! People are in no such hurry to help their +neighbours. My husband's as good a man as any going; but it don't mean +he would take a boy because nobody else would have him. A fool of a +woman might--I won't say; but not a man I ever knew. No, no! He saw +the way you managed that bull!--a far more unreasonable creature than +any we have to do with!” + +“Ah! you don't know Nimrod, ma'am!” + +“I don't, an' I don't want to!--Such wild animals ought to be put in +caravans!” she added, with a laugh. + +“Well, ma'am,” said Clare, “if you and Mr. Halliwell are of one mind, +nothing would please me so much as to serve you and the beasts. But I +should like to be sure about it, for where husband and wife are not of +one mind--well, it is uncomfortable!” + +Thereupon he told her how he had stood with the farmer and his wife; +and from that she led him on through his whole story--not +unaccompanied with tears on the part of his deliverer, for she was a +tender-souled as well as generous and friendly woman. In her heart she +rejoiced to think that the boy's sufferings would now be at an end; +and thenceforward she was, as he always called her, his third mother. + +“My poor, ill-used child!” she said. “But I'll be a mother to you--if +you'll have me!” + +“You wouldn't mind if I thought rather often of my two other mothers, +ma'am--would you?” he said. + +“God forbid, boy!” she answered. “If I were your real mother, would I +have my own flesh and blood ungrateful? Should I be proud of him for +loving nobody but me? That's like the worst of the beasts: they love +none but their little ones--and that only till they're tired of the +trouble of them!” + +“Thank you! Then I will be your son Clare, please, ma'am.” + +The next time they stopped, she made her husband come into her +caravan, and then and there she would and did have everything +arranged. When both her husband and the boy would have left his wages +undetermined, she would not hear of it, but insisted that so much a +week should be fixed at once to begin with. She had no doubt, she +said, that her husband would soon be ready enough to raise his wages; +but he must have his food and five shillings a week now, and +Mr. Halliwell must advance money to get him decent clothes: he might +keep the wages till the clothes were paid for! + +Everything she wished was agreed to by her husband, and at the next +town, Clare's new mother saw him dressed to her satisfaction, and to +his own. She would have his holiday clothes better than his present +part in life required, and she would not let his sovereign go toward +paying for them: that she would keep ready in case he might want it! +Her eyes followed him about with anxious pride--as if she had been his +mother in fact as she was in truth. + +He had at once plenty to do. The favour of his mother saved him from +no kind of work, neither had he any desire it should. Every morning he +took his share in cleaning out the cages, and in setting water for the +beasts, and food for the birds and such other creatures as took it +when they pleased. At the proper intervals he fed as many as he might +of those animals that had stated times for their meals; and found the +advantage of this in its facilitating his friendly approaches to +them. He helped with the horses also--with whose harness and ways he +was already familiar. In a very short time he was known as a friend by +every civilized animal in and about the caravans. + +He did all that was required of him, and more. Not everyone of course +had a right to give him orders, but Clare was not particular as to who +wanted him, or for what. He was far too glad to have work to look at +the gift askance. He did not make trouble of what ought to be none, by +saying, with the spirit of a slave, “It's not my place.” He did many +things which he might have disputed, for he never thought of disputing +them. Thus, both for himself and for others, he saved a great deal of +time, and avoided much annoyance and much quarrelling. Thus also he +gained many friends. + + + +Chapter XLVII. + +Glum Gunn. + + +He had but one enemy, and he did not make him such: he was one by +nature. For he was so different from Clare that he disliked him the +moment he saw him, and it took but a day to ripen his dislike into +hatred. Like Mr. Maidstone, he found the innocent fearlessness of +Clare's expression repulsive. His fingers twitched, he said, to have a +twist at the sheep-nose of him. Unhappily for Clare, he was of +consequence in the menagerie, having money in the concern. He was +half-brother to the proprietor, but so unlike him that he might not +have had a drop of blood from the same source. An ill-tempered, +imperious man, he would hurt himself to have his way, for he was the +merest slave to what he fancied. When a man _will_ have a thing, right +or wrong, that man is a slave to that thing--the meanest of slaves, a +willing one. He was the terror of the men beneath him, heeding no man +but his brother--and him only because he knew “he would stand no +nonsense.” To his sister-in-law he was civil: she was his brother's +wife, and his brother was proud of her! Also he knew that she was +perfect in her part of the business. So it was reason to stand as well +as he might with her! + +Clare had no suspicion that he more than disliked him. It took him +days indeed to discover even that he did not love him--notwithstanding +the bilious eye which, when its owner was idle, kept constantly +following him. And idle he often was, not from laziness, but from the +love of ordering about, and looking superior. + +It was natural that such a man should also be cruel. There are who +find their existence pleasant in proportion as they make that of +others miserable. He had no liking for any of the animals, regarding +them only as property with never a right;--as if God would make +anything live without thereby giving it rights! To Glum Gunn, as he +was commonly called behind his back, the animals were worth so much +money to sell, and so much to show. Yet he prided himself that he had +a great influence as well as power over them, an occult superiority +that made him their lord. It was merely a phase of the vulgarest +self-conceit. He posed to himself as a lion-tamer! He had never tamed +a lion, or any creature else, in his life; but when he had a wild +thing safe within iron bars, then he “let him know who was his +master!” By the terror of his whip, and means far worse, he compelled +obedience. The grizzly alone, of the larger animals, he never +interfered with. + +From the first he received Clare's “_Good-morning, sir_,” with a +silent stare; and the boy at last, thinking he did not like to be so +greeted, gave up the salutation. This roused Gunn's anger and +increased his hate. But indeed any boy petted by his sister-in-law, +would have been odious to him; and any boy whatever would have found +him a hard master. Clare was for a while protected by the man's +unreadiness to have words with his brother, who always took his wife's +part; but the tyrant soon learned that he might venture far. + +For he saw, by the boy's ready smile, that he never resented anything, +which the brute, as most boys would have done, attributed to +cowardice; and he learned that he never carried tales to his sister, +of which, instead of admiring him for his reticence, he took +advantage, and set about making life bitter to him. + +It was some time before he began to succeed, for Clare was hard to +annoy. Patient, and right ready to be pleased, he could hardly imagine +offence intended; the thought was all but unthinkable to Clare's +nature; so he let evil pass and be forgotten as if it had never been. +Once, as he ran along with a heavy pail of water, Gunn shot out his +foot and threw him down: he rose with a cut in his forehead, and a +smile on his lips. He carried the mark of the pail as long as he +carried his body, but it was long before he believed he had been +tripped up. Had it been proved to him at the time, he would have taken +it as a joke, intending no hurt. He did not see the lurid smile on the +man's face as he turned away, a smile of devilish delight at the +discomfiture of a hated fellow-creature. Gunn put him to the dirtiest +work--only to find that it did not trouble him: the boy was a rare +gentleman--unwilling another should have more that he might have less +of the disagreeable. I have two or three times heard him say that no +man had the right to require of another the thing he would think +degrading to himself. He said he learned this from the New Testament. +“But,” he said, “nothing God has made necessary, can possibly be +degrading. It may not be the thing for this or that man, at this or +that time, to do, but it cannot in itself be degrading.” + +The boy had to take his turn with several in acting showman to the +gazing crowd, and by and by the part fell to him oftenest. Each had +his own way of filling the office. One would repeat his information +like a lesson in which he was not interested, and expected no one else +to be interested. Another made himself the clown of the exhibition, +and joked as much and as well as he could. Gunn delighted in telling +as many lies as he dared: he must not be suspected of making fools of +his audience! Clare, who from books knew far more than any of the +others concerning the creatures in their wild state, and who, by +watching them because he loved them, had already noted things none of +the others had observed, and was fast learning more, talked to the +spectators out of his own sincere and warm interest, giving them from +his treasure things new and old--things he had read, and things he had +for himself discovered. Group after group of simple country people +would listen intently as he led them round, eager after every word; +and as any peg will do to hang hate upon, even this success was noted +with evil eye by Glum Gunn. Almost anything served to increase his +malignity. Whether or not it grew the faster that he had as yet found +no wider outlet for it, I cannot tell. + +At last, however, the tyrant learned how to inflict the keenest pain +on the tender-hearted boy, counting him the greater idiot that he +could so “be got at,” as he phrased it, and promising himself much +enjoyment from the discovery. But he did not know--how should he +know--what love may compel! + + + +Chapter XLVIII. + +The puma. + + +I need hardly say that by this time all the beasts with any +friendliness in them had for Clare a little more than their usual +amount of that feeling. But there was one between whom and him--I +prefer _who_ to _which_ for certain animals--a real friendship had +begun at once, and had grown and ripened rapidly till it was strong on +both sides. Clare's new friend--and companion as much as circumstance +permitted--was the same whose lonely gambols had so much attracted him +the night he first entered the menagerie. The animal, whom Clare had +taken for a young lion--without being so far wrong, for he has often +been called the American lion--was the puma, or couguar, peculiar to +America, with a relation to the jaguar, also American, a little +similar to that of the lion to the tiger. But while the jaguar is as +wicked a beast as the tiger, the puma possesses, in relation to man, +far more than the fabulous generosity of the lion. Like every good +creature he has been misunderstood and slandered, but a few have known +him, He has doubtless degenerated in districts, for as the wild animal +must gradually disappear before the human, he cannot help becoming in +the process less friendly to humanity; but an essential and +distinctive characteristic of the puma is his love for the human +being--a love persistent, devoted, and long-suffering. + +Between such an animal and Clare, it is not surprising that friendship +should at once have blossomed. He stroked the paw of the Indian lion +the first morning, but the day was not over when he was stroking the +cheek of the puma; while all he could do with the grizzly at the end +of the month was to feed him a little on the sly, and get for thanks a +growl of the worse hate. There are men that would soonest tear their +benefactors, loathing them the more that they cannot get at them. I +suspect that in some mysterious way Glum Gunn and the bear were own +brothers. With the elephant Clare did what he pleased--never pleasing +anything that was not pleasing to the elephant. + +They came to a town where they exhibited every day for a week, and +there it was that the friendship of Clare and the puma reached its +perfection. One night the boy could not sleep, and drawn by his love, +went down among the cages to see how his fellow-creatures were getting +through the time of darkness. There was just light enough from a small +moon to show the dim outlines of the cages, and the motion without the +form of any moving animal. The puma, in his solitary yet joyous +gymnastics, was celebrating the rites of freedom according to his +custom. When Clare entered, he made a peculiar purring noise, and +ceased his amusement--a game at ball, with himself for the ball. Clare +went to him, and began as usual to stroke him on the face and nose; +whereupon the puma began to lick his hand with his dry rough +tongue. Clare wondered how it could be nice to have such a dry thing +always in his mouth, but did not pity him for what God had given +him. He had his arm through between the bars of the cage, and his face +pressed close against them, when suddenly the face of the animal was +rubbing itself against what it could reach of his. The end was, that +Clare drew aside the bolt of the cage-door, and got in beside the +puma. The creature's gladness was even greater than if he had found a +friend of his own kind. Noses and cheeks and heads were rubbed +together; tongue licked, and hand stroked and scratched. Then they +began to frolic, and played a long time, the puma jumping over Clare, +and Clare, afraid to jump lest he should make a noise, tumbling over +the puma. The boy at length went fast asleep; and in the morning found +the creature lying with his head across his body, wide awake but +motionless, as if guarding him from disturbance. Nobody was stirring; +and Clare, who would not have their friendship exposed to every +comment, crept quietly from the cage, and went to his own bed. + +The next night, as soon as the place was quiet, Clare went down, and +had another game with the puma. Before their sport was over, he had +begun to teach him some of the tricks he had taught Abdiel; but he +could not do much for fear of making a noise and alarming some keeper. + +The same thing took place, as often as it was possible, for some +weeks, and Clare came to have as much confidence, in so far at least +as good intention was concerned, in the puma as in Abdiel. If only he +could have him out of the cage, that the dear beast might have a +little taste of old liberty! But not being certain how the puma would +behave to others, or if he could then control him, he felt he had no +right to release him. + +Now and then he would fall asleep in the cage, whereupon the puma +would always lie down close beside him. Whether the puma slept, I do +not know. + +On one such occasion, Clare started to his feet half-awake, roused by +a terrific roar. Right up on end stood the couguar, flattening his +front against the bars of the cage, which he clawed furiously, +snarling and spitting and yelling like the huge cat he was, every +individual hair on end, and his eyes like green lightning. Clatter, +clatter, went his great feet on the iron, as he tore now at this bar +now at that, to get at something out in the dim open space. It was too +dark for Clare to see what it was that thus infuriated him, but his +ear discovered what his eye could not. For now and then, woven into +the mad noise of the wild creature, in which others about him were +beginning to join, he heard the modest whimper of a very tame +one--Abdiel, against whose small person, gladly as he would have been +“naught a while,” this huge indignation was levelled. Must there not +be a deeper ground for the enmity of dogs and cats than evil human +incitement? Their antipathy will have to be explained in that history +of animals which I have said must one day be written. + +Clare had taken much pains to make Abdiel understand that he was not +to intrude where his presence was not desired--that the show was not +for him, and thought the dog had learned perfectly that never on any +pretence, or for any reason, was he to go down those steps, however +often he saw his master go down. This prohibition was a great trial to +Abdiel's loving heart, but it had not until this night been a trial +too great for his loving will. + +When Clare left him, he thought he had taken his usual pains in +shutting him into a small cage he had made to use on such occasions, +lest he might be tempted to think, when he saw nobody about, that the +law no longer applied. But he had not been careful enough; and Abdiel, +sniffing about and finding his door unfastened, had interpreted the +fact as a sign that he might follow his master. Hence all the +coil. For pumas--whereby also must hang an explanation in that book of +zoology, have an intense hatred of dogs. Tame from cubhood, they never +get over their antipathy to them. With pumas it is “Love you, hate +your dog.” In the present case there could be no individual jealousy, +of which passion beasts and birds are very capable, for Pummy had +never seen Abby before. There may be in the puma an inborn jealousy of +dogs, as a race more favoured than pumas by the man whom yet they love +perhaps more passionately. + +As soon as Clare saw what the matter was, he slipped out of the cage, +and catching up the obnoxious offender--where he stood wagging all +over as if his entire body were but a self-informed tail--sped with +him to his room, and gave him a serious talking-to. + +The puma was quiet the moment the dog was out of his sight. Doubtless +he regarded Clare as his champion in distress, and blessed him for the +removal of that which his soul hated. But, alas, mischief was already +afoot! Gunn, waked by the roaring, came flying with his whip, and the +remnants of poor Pummy's excitement were enough to betray him to the +eyes of the tamer of caged animals. Clare would have recognized by the +roar itself the individual in trouble; but Glum Gunn had little +knowledge even of the race. He counted the couguar a coward, because +he showed no resentment. A man may strike him or wound him, and he +will make no retaliation; he will even let a man go on to kill him, +and make no defence beyond moans and tears. But Gunn knew nothing of +these facts; he only knew that this puma would not touch _him_. He was +not aware that if he turned the two into the arena of the show, the +puma would kill the grizzly; or that in their own country, the puma +persecutes the jaguar as if he hated him for not being like himself, +the friend of man: the Gauchos of the Pampas call him “The Christians' +Friend.” Gunn did not even know that the horse is the puma's favourite +food: he will leap on the back of a horse at full speed, with his paws +break his neck as he runs, and come down with him in a rolling +heap. Neither did he know that, while submissive to man--as if the +maker of both had said to him, “Slay my other creatures, but do my +anointed no harm,”--he could yet upon occasion be provoked to punish +though not to kill him. + +Glum Gunn rushed across the area, jumped into the cage of the puma, +and began belabouring him with his whip. The beast whimpered and wept, +and the brute belaboured him. Clare heard the changed cry of his +friend, and came swooping like the guardian angel he was. When he saw +the patient creature on his haunches like a dog, accepting Gunn's +brutality without an attempt to escape it--except, indeed, by dodging +any blows at his head so cleverly that the ruffian could not once hit +it--he bounded to the cage, wild with anger and pity. But Gunn stood +with his back against the door of it, and he was reduced to entreaty. + +“Oh, sir! sir!” he cried, in a voice full of tears; “it was all my +fault! Abby came to look for me, and I didn't know Pummy disliked +dogs!” + +“Do you tell me, you rascal, that you were down among the hanimals +when I supposed you in your bed?” + +“Yes, sir, I was. I didn't know there was any harm. I wasn't doing +anything wrong.” + +“Hold your jaw! What _was_ you doing?” + +“I was only in the cage with the puma.” + +“You was! You have the impudence to tell me that to my face! I'll +teach you, you cotton-face! you milk-pudding! to go corrupting the +hanimals and making them not worth their salt!” + +He swung himself out of the cage-door in a fury, but Clare, with his +friend in danger, would not run. The wretch seized him by the collar, +and began to lash him as he had been lashing the puma. Happily he was +too close to him to give him such stinging blows. + +With the first hiss of the thong, came a tearing screech from the +puma, as he flung himself in fury upon the door of his cage. Gunn in +his wrath with Clare had forgotten to bolt it. Dragging with his +claws, he found it unfastened, pulled it open, and like a huge shell +from a mortar, shot himself at Gunn. Down he went. For one moment the +puma stood over him, swinging his tail in great sweeps, and looking at +him, doubtless with indignation. Then before Clare could lay hold of +him, for Clare too had fallen by the onset, Pummy turned a scornful +back upon his enemy, and walking away with a slow, careless stride, as +if he were not worth thinking of more, leaped into his cage, and lay +down. The thing passed so swiftly that Clare did not see him touch the +man with his paw, and thought he had but thrown him down with his +weight. The beast, however, had not left the brute without the lesson +he needed; he had given him just one little pat on the side of the +head. + +Gunn rose staggering. The skin and something more was torn down his +cheek from the temple almost to the chin, and the blood was +streaming. Clare hastened to help him, but he flung him aside, +muttering with an oath, “I'll make you pay for this!” and went out, +holding his head with both hands. + +Clare went and shot the bolt of the cage. Pummy sprang up. His tail +and swift-shifting feet showed eager expectation of a romp. He had +already forgotten the curling lash of the terrible whip! But Clare +bade him good-night with a kiss through the bars. + +Glum Gunn kept his bed for more than a week. When at length he +appeared, a demonstration of the best art of the surgeon of the town, +he was not beautiful to look upon. To the end of his evil earthly days +he bore an ugly scar; and neither his heart nor his temper were the +better for his well deserved punishment. + +Mrs. Halliwell questioned Clare about the whole thing, inquiring +further and further as his answers suggested new directions. Her +catechism ended with a partial discovery of Gunn's behaviour to her +_protegé_, whom she loved the more that he had been so silent +concerning it. She stood perturbed. One moment her face flushed with +anger, the next turned pale with apprehension. She bit her lip, and +the tears came in her eyes. + +“Never mind, mother,” said Clare, who saw no reason for such emotion; +“I'm not afraid of him.” + +“I know you're not, sonny,” she answered; “but that don't make me the +less afraid for you. He's a bad man, that brother-in-law of mine! I +fear he'll do you a mischief. I'm afraid I did wrong in taking you! I +ought to have done what I could for you without keeping you about +me. We can't get rid of him because he's got money in the business. +Not that he's part owner--I don't mean that! If we'd got the money +handy, we'd pay him off at once!” + +“I don't care about myself,” said Clare. “I don't mean I like to be +kicked, but it don't make me miserable. What I can't bear is to see +him cruel to the beasts. I love the beasts, mother--even cross old +Grizzly.--But Mr. Gunn don't meddle much with _him_!” + +“He respects his own ugly sort!” answered Mrs. Halliwell, with a +laugh. + +For a while it was plain to Clare that the master kept an eye on his +brother, and on himself and the puma. On one occasion he told the +assembled staff that he would have no tyranny: every one knew there +was among them but one tyrant. Gunn saw that his brother was awake and +watching: it was a check on his conduct, but he hated Clare the +worse. For the puma, he was afraid of him now, and went no more into +his cage. + +With the rest of the men Clare was a favourite, for they knew him true +and helpful, and constantly the same: they could always depend on him! +Abdiel shared in the favour shown his master. They said the dog was no +beauty, and had not a hair of breeding, but he was almost a human +creature, if he wasn't too good for one, and it was a shame to kick +him. + + + +Chapter XLIX. + +Glum Gunn's revenge. + + +They had opened the menagerie in a certain large town. It was the +evening-exhibition, and Clare was going his round with his wand of +office, pointing to the different animals, and telling of them what he +thought would most interest his hearers, when another attendant, the +most friendly of all, came behind him, and whispered that Glum Gunn +had got hold of Abby, and must be going to do the dog a +mischief. Clare instantly gave him his wand, and bolted through the +crowd, reproaching himself that, because Abby seemed restless, he had +shut him up: if he had not been shut up, Gunn would not have got hold +of him! + +When he reached the top of the steps, there was Gunn on the platform, +addressing the crowd. It was plain to the boy, by this time not +inexperienced, that he had been drinking, and, though not drunk, had +taken enough to rouse the worst in him. He had the poor dog by the +scruff of the neck, and was holding him out at arm's-length. Abdiel +was the very picture of wretchedness. Except in colour and size, he +was more like a flea than like any sort of dog--with his hind legs +drawn up, his tail tucked in tight between them, and his back-bone +curved into a half circle. In this uncomfortable plight, the tyrant +was making a burlesque speech about him. + +“Here you see, ladies and gentlemen,” he said, resuming a little, for +a few fresh spectators were in the act of joining the border of the +crowd, “as I have already had the honour of informing you, one of the +most extraordinary productions of the vegetable kingdom. It is not +unnatural that you should be, as I see you are, inclined to dispute +the assertion. I am, indeed, far from being surprised at your +scepticism; the very strangeness of the phenomenon consists in his +being to all appearance neither more nor less than a dog. But when I +have the honour of leaving you to your astonishment, I shall have +convinced you that he is in reality nothing but a vegetable. I would +plainly call him what he is--a cucumber, did I not fear the statement +would demand of you more than your powers of credence, evidently +limited, could well afford. But when I have, before your eyes, cut the +throat of this vegetable, so extremely like an ugly mongrel, and when +those eyes see no single drop of blood follow the knife, then you will +be satisfied of the truth of my assertion; and, having gazed on such a +specimen of Nature's jugglery, will, I hope, do me the honour to walk +up and behold yet greater wonders within.” + +He ceased, and set about getting his knife from his pocket. + +Clare, watching Gunn's every motion, had partially sheltered himself +behind the side of the doorway. One who did not know Gunn, might well +have taken the thing for a practical joke, as innocent as it was +foolish, the pretended conclusion of which would be met by some +comical frustration, probably the dog's escape; but Clare saw that his +friend was in mortal peril. With the eye of one used to wild animals +and the unexpectedness of their sudden motions, he stood following +every movement of Gunn's hands, ready to anticipate whatever action +might indicate its own approach: he watched like the razor-clawed +lynx. While Gunn held Abdiel as he did, he could not seriously injure +him; and although he was hurting him dreadfully, his hate-possessed +fingers, like a live, writhing vice, worrying and squeezing the skin +of his poor little neck, it yet was better to wait the right moment. + +When he saw the arm that held the dog drawn in, and the other hand +move to the man's pocket, he knew that in a moment more, with a +theatrical cry of dismay from the murderer, the body of his friend +would be dashed on the ground, his head half off, and the blood +streaming from his neck. They were mostly a rather vulgar people that +stood about the platform, not a few of them capable of being delighted +with such an end to a joke poor without some catastrophe. + +The wretch had stooped a little, and slightly relaxed his hold on the +dog to open his knife, when with a bound that doubled the force of the +blow Clare struck him on the side of the head. He had no choice where +to hit him, and his fist fell on the spot so lately torn by the claws +of Pummy. The tyrant fell, and lay for a moment stunned. Abdiel flung +himself on his master, exultant at finding the thing after all the +joke he had been trying in vain to believe it. Clare caught him up and +dashed down the steps, one instant before Glum Gunn rose, cursing +furiously. Clare charged the crowd: it was not a time to be civil! +Abdiel's life was in imminent danger! That his own was in the same +predicament did not occur to him. + +His sudden rush took the crowd by surprise, or those next the caravans +would, I fear, have stopped him. Some started to follow him, but the +portion of the crowd he came to next, had more in it of a better sort, +and closed up behind him. There all the women and most of the men took +the part of the boy that loved his dog. + +“What be you a-shovin' at?” bawled a huge country-man, against whom +Gunn made a cannon as he rushed in pursuit. “Aw'll knock 'ee flat--aw +wull! Let little un an's dawg aloan! Aw be for un! Hit me an'ye +choose--aw doan't objec'!” + +Every attempt Gunn made to pass him, the man pushed his great body in +his way, and he soon saw there was no chance of overtaking Clara The +wings of Hate are swift, but not so swift as those of rescuing Love; +and Help is far readier to run to Love than to Hate. + + + +Chapter L. + +Clare seeks help. + + +Clare got out of the crowd, and was soon beyond sight of anyone that +knew what had taken place, his heart exulting that he had saved his +friend who trusted in him. He hurried on, heedless whither, his only +thought to get away from the man that would murder Abby; and the town +was a long way behind ere the question of what they were to do for +supper and shelter presented itself. This had grown a strange thought, +so long had the caravan been to him a house of warmth and plenty. But +comfort has its disadvantages; and Clare discovered, with some dismay, +that he was not quite so free as ere the luxurious life of the last +few weeks began: both Abby and he would be less able, he feared, to +bear hunger and cold. It was but to start afresh, however, and grow +abler! One consolation was, that, if they felt hunger more, it could +not do them so much harm: they had more capital to go upon. He must +not gather cowardice instead of courage from a season of prosperity! +He was glad for Abdiel, though, that he grew his own clothes: he had +left his warmest behind him. + +It made him ashamed to find himself regretting his clothes when he had +lost a mother! Then it pleased him to think that she had his +sovereign, and the wages due since his clothes were paid for. They +would help to give Glum Gunn his own, and set the beasts free from +him! Then he would go back and spend his life with his mother and +Pummy! Poor Pummy! But though Gunn hated him, he was now afraid of him +too; and his fear would be the creature's protection! He had imagined +it his might that cowed the puma, when it was the animal's human +gentleness that made him submissive to man: he knew better now! Clare +clasped Abdiel to his bosom, and trudged on. They had gone miles ere +it occurred to him that it might be more comfortable for both if each +carried his individual burden. He set Abdiel down, and the dog ran +vibrating with pleasure. Clare felt himself set down, but with no tail +to wag. + +It was late in the autumn: they could do without supper, but they must +if possible find shelter! A farm-house came in sight. It recalled so +vividly Clare's early experiences of houselessness, that beasts and +caravans, his mother and Glum Gunn, grew hazy and distant, and the old +time drew so near that he seemed to have waked into it out of a long +dream. They were back in the old misery--a misery in which, however, +his heart had not been pierced as now with the pangs of innocent +creatures unable or unwilling to defend themselves from their natural +guardian! It was long before he learned that for weeks Gunn was unable +to hurt one of them; that his drinking, his late wound, and the blow +Clare had given him, brought on him a severe attack of erysipelas. + +When they reached the farm-yard, Clare knew by the aspect of things +that the cattle were housed and the horses suppered. He crept unseen +into one of the cow-houses: the bodies and breath of the animals would +keep them warm! How sweet the smell seemed to him after that of the +caravans! An empty stall was before him, like a chamber prepared for +his need. He gathered a few straws from under each of the cows, taking +care that not one of them should be the less comfortable, and spread +with them for Abby and himself a thin couch. + +But with the excitement of what had happened, his wonder as to what +would come next, and the hunger that had begun to gnaw at him, Clare +could not sleep. And as he lay awake, thoughts came to him. + +Whence do the thoughts come to us? Of one thing I am sure--that I do +not make or even send for my own thoughts. If some greater one did not +think about us, we should not think about anything. Then what a wonder +is the night! How it works compelling people to think! Surely somehow +God comes nearer in the night! Clare began to think how helpless he +was. He was not thinking of food and warmth, but of doing things for +the beings he loved. It seemed to him hard that he could but love, and +nothing more. There was his mother! he could do nothing to deliver her +from that villainous brother-in-law! There was Pummy, exposed to the +cruelty of the same evil man! and again he could do nothing for him! +There was Maly! he could do nothing for her--nothing to make her +father and mother glad for her up in the dome of the angels! + +Was it possible that he really could do nothing? + +Then came the thought that people used to say prayers in the days when +he went with his mother to church. He had been taught to say prayers +himself, but had begun to forget them when there was no bed to kneel +beside. What did saying prayers mean? In the Bible-stories people +prayed when they were in trouble and could not help themselves! Did it +matter that he had no church and no bedside? Surely one place must be +as good as another, if it was true that God was everywhere! Surely he +could hear him wherever he spoke! Neither could there be any necessity +for speaking loud! God would hear, however low he spoke! Then he +remembered that God knew the thoughts of his creatures: if so, he +might think a prayer to him; there was no need for any words! + +From the moment of that conclusion, Clare began to pray to God. And +now he prayed the right kind of prayer; that is, his prayers were real +prayers; he asked for what he wanted. To say prayers asking God for +things we do not care about, is to mock him. When we ask for something +we want, it may be a thing God does not care to give us; but he likes +us to speak to him about it. If it is good for us, he will give it us; +if it is not good, he will not give it to us, for it would hurt +us. But Clare only asked God to do what he is always doing: his prayer +was that God would be good to all his mothers, and to his two fathers, +and Mr. Halliwell, and Maly, and Sarah, and his own baby, and +Tommy--and poor Pummy, and would, if Glum Gunn beat him, help him to +bear the blows, and not mind them very much. He ended with something +like this: + +“God, I can't do anything for anybody! I wish I could! You can get +near them, God: please do something good to every one of them because +I can't. I think I could go to sleep now, if I were sure you had +listened!” + +Having thus cast all his cares on God, he did go to sleep; and woke in +the morning ready for the new day that arrived with his waking. + + + +Chapter LI. + +Clare a true master. + + +It would take a big book to tell all the things of interest that +happened to Clare in the next few weeks. They would be mainly how and +where he found refuge, and how he and Abdiel got things to eat. Verily +they did not live on the fat of the land. Now and then some benevolent +person, seeing him in such evident want, would contrive a job in order +to pay him for it: in one place, although they had no need of him, +certain good people gave him ten days' work under a gardener, and +dismissed him with twenty shillings in his pocket. + +One way and another, Clare and Abdiel did not die of hunger or of +cold. That is the summary of their history for a good many weeks. + +One night they slept on a common, in the lee of a gypsy tent, and +contrived to get away in the morning without being seen. For Clare +feared they might offer him something stolen, and hunger might +persuade him to ask no questions. Many respectable people will laugh +at the idea of a boy being so particular. Such are immeasurably more +to be pitied than Clare. No one could be hard on a boy who in such +circumstances took what was offered him, but he would not be so honest +as Clare--though he might well be more honest than such as would laugh +at him. + +Another time he went up to a large house, to see if he might not there +get a job. He found the place, for the time at least, abandoned: I +suppose the persons in charge had deserted their post to make +holiday. He lingered about until the evening fell, and then got with +Abdiel under a glass frame in the kitchen-garden. But the glass was so +close to them that Clare feared breaking it; so they got out again, +and lay down on a bench in a shed for potting plants. + +Clare was waked in the morning by a sound cuff on the side of the +head. He got off the bench, took up Abdiel, and coming to himself, +said to the gardener who stood before him in righteous indignation, + +“I'm much obliged to you for my bedroom, sir. It was very cold last +night.” + +His words and respectful manner mollified the gardener a little. + +“You have no business here!” he returned. + +“I know that, sir; but what is a boy to do?” answered Clare. “I wasn't +hurting anything, and it was so cold we might have died if we had +slept out of doors.” + +“That's no business of mine!” + +“But it is of mine,” rejoined Clare; “--except you think a boy that +can't get work ought to commit suicide. If he mustn't do that, he +can't always help doing what people with houses don't like!” + +The gardener was not a bad sort of fellow, and perceived the truth in +what the boy said. + +“That's always the story!” he replied, however. “Can't get work! No +idle boy ever could get work! I know the sort of you--well!” + +“Would you mind giving me a chance?” returned Clare eagerly. “I +wouldn't ask much wages.” + +“You wouldn't, if you asked what you was worth!” + +“We'd be worth our victuals anyhow!” answered Clare, who always +counted the dog. + +“Who's we?” asked the man. “Be there a hundred of you?” + +“No; only two. Only me and Abdiel here!” + +“Oh, that beast of a mongrel?” + +The gardener made a stride as if to seize the dog. Clare bounded from +him. The man burst into a mocking laugh. + +“He's a good dog, indeed, sir!” said Clare. + +“You'll give him the sack before I give you a job.” + +“We're old friends, sir; we can't be parted!” + +“I thought as much!” cried the gardener. “They're always ready to +work, an' so hungry! But will they part with the mangy dog? Not they! +Hard work and good wages ain't nowhere beside a mongrel pup! Get out! +Don't I know the whole ugly bilin' of ye!” + +Clare turned away with a gentle good-morning, which the man did not +get out of his heart for a matter of two days, and departed, hugging +Abdiel. + +He was often cold and always hungry, but his life was anything but +dull. The man who does not know where his next meal is to come from, +is seldom afflicted with ennui. That is the monopoly of the enviable +with nothing to do, and everything money can get them. A foolish +west-end life has immeasurably more discomfort in it than that of a +street Arab. The ordinary beggar, while in tolerable health, finds far +more enjoyment than most fashionable ladies. + +Thus Clare went wandering long, seeking work, and finding next to +none--all the time upheld by the feeling that something was waiting +for him somewhere, that he was every day drawing nearer to it. Not +once yet had he lost heart. In very virtue of unselfishness and lack +of resentment, he was strong. Not once had he shed a tear for himself, +not once had he pitied his own condition. + + + +Chapter LII. + +Miss Tempest. + + +Without knowing it, he was approaching the sea. Walking along a chain +of downs, he saw suddenly from the top of one of them, for the first +time in his memory though not in his life, the sea--a pale blue cloud, +as it appeared, far on the horizon, between two low hills. The sight +of it, although he did not at first know what it was, brought with it +a strange inexplicable feeling of dolorous pleasure. For this he could +not account. It was the faintest revival of an all but obliterated +impression of something familiar to his childhood, lying somewhere +deeper than the memory, which was a blank in regard to it. But that +feeling was not all that the sight awoke in him. The pale blue cloud +bore to him such a look of the eternal, that it seemed the very place +for God to live in--the solemn, stirless region of calm in which the +being to whom now of late he had first begun in reality to pray, kept +his abode. The hungry, worn, tattered boy, with nothing to call his +own but a great hope and a little dog, fell down on his bare knees on +the hard road, and stretched out his hands in an ecstasy toward the +low cloud. + +The far-off ringing tramp of a horse's feet aroused him. He rose light +as an athlete, the great hope grown twice its former size, and hunger +forgotten. + +The blue cloud kept in sight, and by and by he knew it was the sea he +saw, though how or at what moment the knowledge came to him he could +not have told. The track was leading him toward one of the principal +southern ports. + +By this time he was again very thin; but he had brown cheeks and clear +eyes, and, save when suffering immediately from hunger, felt perfectly +well. Hunger is a sad thing notwithstanding its deep wholesomeness; +but there is immeasurably more suffering in the world from eating too +much than from eating too little. + +Well able by this time to read the signs of the road, he perceived at +length he must be drawing near a town. He had already passed a house +or two with a little lawn in front, and indications of a garden +behind; and he hoped yet again that here, after all, he might get +work. To door after door he carried his modest request: some doors +were shut in his face almost before he could speak; at others he had a +civil word from maid, or a rough word from man; from none came sound +of assent. It had become harder too to find shelter. Ever as he went, +space was more and more appropriated and enclosed; less and less room +was left for the man for whom had been made no special cubic provision +of earth and air, and who had no money--the most disreputable of +conditions in the eyes of such as would be helpless if they had +none. A rare philosopher for eyes capable of understanding him, he was +a despicable being in the eyes of the common man. To know a human +being one must be human--that is, the divine must be strong in him. + +For some days now, neither Clare nor Abdiel had come even within sight +of food enough to make a meal. The dog was rather thinner than his +master. + +“Abdiel,” said Clare to him one day, “I fear you will soon be a +serpent! Your body gets longer and longer, and your legs get shorter +and shorter: you'll be crawling presently, rubbing the hair off your +useless little belly on the dusty road! Never mind, Abdiel; you'll be +a good serpent. Satan was turned into a bad serpent because he was a +bad angel; you will be a good serpent, because you are a good dog! I +hope, however, we shall yet put a stop to the serpent-business!” + +Abdiel wagged his tail, as much as to say, “All right, master!” + +The nights were now very cold; winter was coming fast. Had Clare been +long enough in one place for people to know him, he would never have +been allowed to go so cold and hungry; but he had always to move on, +and nobody had time to learn to care about him. So the terrible +sunless season threatened to wrap him in its winding-sheet, and lay +him down. + +One evening, just before sunset, grown sleepy in spite of the +gathering cold, he sat down on one of the two steep grassy slopes that +bordered the road. His feet were bare now, bare and brown, for his +shoes had come to such plight that it was a relief to throw them away; +but his soles had grown like leather. They rested in the dry shallow +rain-channel, and his body leaned back against the slope. Abdiel, +instead of jumping on the bank and lying in the soft grass, lay down +on the leathery feet, and covered them from the night with his long +faithful body and its coat of tangled hair. + +The sun was shooting his last radiance along the road, and its redness +caressed the sleeping companions, when an elderly lady came to her +gate at the top of the opposite slope, and looked along the road with +the sun. Her reverting glance fell upon the sleepers--the Knight of +Hope lying in rags, not marble, his feet not upon his dog, but his dog +upon his feet. It was a touching picture, and the old lady's heart was +one easily touched. She looked and saw that the face of the boy, whose +hunger was as plain as his rags, was calm as the wintry sky. She +wondered, but she needed not have wondered; for storm of anger, +drought of greed, nor rotting mist of selfishness, had passed or +rested there, to billow, or score, or waste. + +Her mere glance seemed to wake Abdiel, who took advantage of his +waking to have a lick at the brown, dusty, brave, uncomplaining feet, +so well used to the world's _via dolorosa_. She saw, and was touched +yet more by this ministration of the guardian of the feet. Gently +opening the gate she descended the slope, crossed the road, and stood +silent, regarding the outcasts. No cloudy blanket covered the sky: ere +morning the dew would lie frozen on the grass! + +“You shouldn't be sleeping there!” she said. + +Abdiel started to his four feet and would have snarled, but with one +look at the lady changed his mind. Clare half awoke, half sat up, made +an inarticulate murmur, and fell back again. + +“Get up, my boy,” said the old lady. “You must indeed!” + +“Oh, please, ma'am, must I?” answered Clare, slowly rising to his +feet. “I had but just lain down, and I'm so tired!--If I mayn't sleep +_there_,” he continued, “where _am_ I to sleep?--Please, ma'am, why is +everybody so set against letting a boy sleep? It don't cost them +anything! I can understand not giving him work, if he looks too much +in want of it; but why should they count it bad of him to lie down and +sleep?” + +The lady wisely let him talk; not until he stopped did she answer him. + +“It's because of the frost, my boy!” she said. “It would be the death +of you to sleep out of doors to-night!” + +“It's a nice place for it, ma'am!” + +“To sleep in? Certainly not!” + +“I didn't mean that, ma'am. I meant a nice place to go away from--to +die in, ma'am!” + +“That is not ours to choose,” answered the old lady severely, but the +tone of her severity trembled. + +“I sha'n't find anywhere so nice as this bank,” said Clare, turning +and looking at it sorrowfully. + +“There are plenty of places in the town. It's but a mile farther on!” + +“But this is so much nicer, ma'am! And I've no money--none at all, +ma'am. When I came out of prison,--” + +“Came out of _where_?” + +“Out of prison, ma'am.” + +He had never been in prison in a legal sense, never having been +convicted of anything; but he did not know the difference between +detention and imprisonment. + +“Prison!” she exclaimed, holding up her hands in horror. “How dare you +mention prison!” + +“Because I was in it, ma'am.” + +“And to say it so coolly too! Are you not ashamed of yourself?” + +“No, ma'am.” + +“It's a shame to have been in prison.” + +“Not if I didn't do anything wrong.” + +“Nobody will believe that, I'm afraid!” + +“I suppose not, ma'am! I used to feel very angry when people wouldn't +believe me, but now I see they are not to blame. And now I've got used +to it, and it don't hurt so much.--But,” he added with a sigh, “the +worst of it is, they won't give me any work!” + +“Do you always tell people you've come out of prison?” + +“Yes, ma'am, when I think of it.” + +“Then you can't wonder they won't give you work!” + +“I don't, ma'am--not now. It seems a law of the universe!” + +“Not of the universe, I think--but of this world--perhaps!” said the +old lady thoughtfully. + +“But there's one thing I do wonder at,” said Clare. “When I say I've +been in prison, they believe me; but when I say I haven't done +anything wrong, then they mock me, and seem quite amused at being +expected to believe that. I can't get at it!” + +“I daresay! But people will always believe you against yourself.--What +are you going to do, then, if nobody will give you work? You can't +starve!” + +“Indeed I _can_, ma'am! It's just the one thing I've got to do. We've +been pretty near the last of it sometimes--me and Abdiel! Haven't we, +Abby?” + +The dog wagged his tail, and the old lady turned aside to control her +feelings. + +“Don't cry, ma'am,” said Clare; “I don't mind it--not _much_. I'm too +glad I didn't _do_ anything, to mind it much! Why should I! Ought I to +mind it much, ma'am? Jesus Christ hadn't done anything, and they +killed _him_! I don't fancy it's so very bad to die of only hunger! +But we'll soon see!--Sha'n't we, Abby?” + +Again the dog wagged his tail. + +“If you didn't do anything wrong, what _did_ you do?” said the old +lady, almost at her wits' end. + +“I don't like telling things that are not going to be believed. It's +like washing your face with ink!” + +“I will _try_ to believe you.” + +“Then I will tell you; for you speak the truth, ma'am, and so, +perhaps, will be able to believe the truth!” + +“How do you know I speak the truth?” + +“Because you didn't say, 'I will believe you.' Nobody can be sure of +doing that. But you can be sure of _trying_; and you said, 'I will +_try_ to believe you.'” + +“Tell me all about it then.” + +“I will, ma'am.--The policeman came in the middle of the night when we +were asleep, and took us all away, because we were in a house that was +not ours.” + +“Whose was it then?” + +“Nobody knew. It was what they call in chancery. There was nobody in +it but moths and flies and spiders and rats;--though I think the rats +only came to eat baby.” + +“Baby! Then the whole family of you, father, mother, and all, were +taken to prison!” + +“No, ma'am; my fathers and my mothers were taken up into the dome of +the angels.”--What with hunger and sleepiness, Clare was talking like +a child.--“I haven't any father and mother in this world. I have two +fathers and two mothers up there, and one mother in this world. She's +the mother of the wild beasts.” + +The old lady began to doubt the boy's sanity, but she went on +questioning him. + +“How did you have a baby with you, then?” + +“The baby was my own, ma'am. I took her out of the water-butt.” + +Once more Clare had to tell his story--from the time, that is, when +his adoptive father and mother died. He told it in such a simple +matter-of-fact way, yet with such quaint remarks, from their very +simplicity difficult to understand, that, if the old lady, for all her +trying, was not able quite to believe his tale, it was because she +doubted whether the boy was not one of God's innocents, with an +angel-haunted brain. + +“And what's become of Tommy?” she asked. + +“He's in the same workhouse with baby. I'm very glad; for what I +should have done with Tommy, and nothing to give him to eat, I can't +think. He would have been sure to steal! I couldn't have kept him from +it!” + +“You must be more careful of your company.” + +“Please, ma'am, I was very careful of Tommy. He had the best company I +could give him: I did try to be better for Tommy's sake. But my trying +wasn't much use to Tommy, so long as he wouldn't try! He was a little +better, though, I think; and if I had him now, and could give him +plenty to eat, and had baby as well as Abdiel to help me, we might +make something of Tommy, I think.--_You_ think so--don't you, Abdiel?” + +The dog, who had stood looking in his master's face all the time he +spoke, wagged his tail faster. + +“What a name to give a dog! Where did you find it?” + +“In Paradise Lost, ma'am. Abdiel was the one angel, you remember, +ma'am, who, when he saw what Satan was up to, left him, and went back +to his duty.” + +“And what was his duty?” + +“Why of course to do what God told him. I love Abdiel, and because I +love the little dog and he took care of baby, I call him Abdiel +too. Heaven is so far off that it makes no confusion to have the same +name.” + +“But how dare you give the name of an angel to a dog?” + +“To a _good_ dog, ma'am! A good dog is good enough to go with any +angel--at his heels of course! If he had been a bad dog, it would have +been wicked to name him after a good angel. If the dog had been +Tommy--I mean if Tommy had been the dog, I should have had to call him +Moloch, or Belzebub! God made the angels and the dogs; and if the dogs +are good, God loves them.--Don't he, Abdiel?” + +Abdiel assented after his usual fashion. The lady said nothing. Clare +went on. + +“Abdiel won't mind--the angel Abdiel, I mean, ma'am--he won't mind +lending his name to my friend. The dog will have a name of his own, +perhaps, some day--like the rest of us!” + +“What is _your_ name?” + +“The name I have now is, like the dog's, a borrowed one. I shall get +my own one day--not here--but there--when--when--I'm hungry enough to +go and find it.” + +Clare had grown very white. He sat down, and lay back on the grass. He +had talked more in those few minutes than for weeks, and want had made +him weak. He felt very faint. The dog jumped up, and fell to licking +his face. + +“What a wicked old woman I am!” said the lady to herself, and ran +across the road like some little long-legged bird, and climbed the +bank swiftly. + +She disappeared within the gate, but to return presently with a +tumbler of milk and a huge piece of bread. + +“Here, boy!” she cried; “here is medicine for you! Make haste and take +it.” + +Clare sat up feebly, and stared at the tumbler for a moment. Either he +could hardly believe his eyes, or was too sick to take it at +once. When he had it in his hand, he held it out to the dog. + +“Here, Abdiel, have a little,” he said. + +This offended the old lady. + +“You're never going to give the dog that good milk!” she cried. + +“A little of it, please, ma'am!” + +“--And feed him out of the tumbler too?” + +“He's had nothing to-day, ma'am, and we're comrades!” + +“But it's not clean of you!” + +“Ah, you don't know dogs, ma'am! His tongue is clean as clean as +anybody's.” + +Abdiel took three or four little laps of the milk, drew away, and +looked up at his master--as much as to say, “You, now!” + +“Besides,” Clare went on, “he couldn't get at it so well in the bottom +of the tumbler.” + +With that he raised it to his own lips, drank eagerly, and set it on +the road half empty, looking his thanks to the giver with a smile she +thought heavenly. Then he broke the bread, and giving the dog nearly +the half of it, began to eat the rest himself. The old lady stood +looking on in silence, pondering what she was to do with the celestial +beggar. + +“Would you mind sleeping in the greenhouse, if I had a bed put up for +you?” she said at length, in tone apologetic. + +“This is a better place--though I wish it was warmer!” said Clare, +with another smile as he looked up at the sky, in which a few stars +were beginning to twinkle, and thought of the gardeners he had +met. “--Don't you think it better, ma'am?” + +“No, indeed, I don't!” she answered crossly; for to her the open air +at night seemed wrong, disreputable. There was something unholy in it! + +“I would rather stay here,” said Clare. + +“Why?” + +“Because you don't quite believe me, ma'am. You can't; and you can't +help it. You wouldn't be able to sleep for thinking that a boy just +out of prison was lying in the greenhouse. There would be no saying +what he might not do! I once read in a newspaper how an old lady took +a lad into her house for a servant, and he murdered her!--No, ma'am, +thank you! After such a supper we shall sleep beautifully!--Sha'n't +we, Abby? And then, perhaps, you could give me a job in the garden +to-morrow! I daresay the gardener wants a little help sometimes! But +if he knew me to have slept in the greenhouse, he would hate me.” + +The old lady said nothing, for, like most old ladies, she feared her +gardener. She took the tumbler from the boy's hand, and went into the +house. But in two minutes she came again, with another great piece of +bread for Clare, and a bone with something on it which she threw to +Abdiel. The dog's ears started up, erect and alive, like individual +creatures, and his eyes gleamed; but he looked at his master, and +would not touch the bone without his leave--which given, he fell upon +it, and worried it as if it had been a rat. + +Clare was now himself again, and when the old lady left them for the +third time, he walked with her across the way, bread in hand, to open +the gate for her. When she was inside, he took off his cap, and bade +her good-night with a grace that won all that was left to be won of +her heart. + +Before she had taken three steps from the gate, the old lady turned. + +“Boy!” she called; and Clare, who was making for his couch under the +stars, hastened back at the sound of her voice. + +“I shall not be able to sleep,” she said, “for thinking of you out +there in the bleak night!” + +“I am used to it, ma'am!” + +“Oh, I daresay! but you see I'm not! and I don't like the thought of +it! You may like hoarfrost-sheets, for what I know, but I don't! You +may like the stars for a tester--because you want to die and go to +them, I suppose!--but I have no fancy for the stars! You are a foolish +fellow, and I am out of temper with you. You don't give a thought to +me--or to my feelings if you should die! I should never go to bed +again with a good conscience!--Besides, I should have to nurse you!” + +The last member of her expostulation was hardly in logical sequence, +but it had not the less influence on Clare for that. + +“I will do whatever you please, ma'am,” he answered humbly. “--Come, +Abdiel!” + +The dog came running across the road with his bone in his mouth. + +“You mustn't bring that inside the gate, Ab!” said Clare. + +The dog dropped it. + +“Good dog! It's a lady's garden, you know, Abdiel!” Then turning to +his hostess, Clare added, “I always tell him when I'm pleased with +him: don't you think it right, ma'am?” + +“I daresay! I don't know anything about dogs.” + +“If you had a dog like Abdiel, he would soon teach you dogs, ma'am!” + rejoined Clare. + +By this time they were at the house-door. The lady told him to wait +there, went in, and had a talk with her two maids. In half an hour, +Clare and his four-footed angel were asleep--in an outhouse, it is +true, but in a comfortable bed, such as they had not seen since their +flight from the caravans. The cold breeze wandered moaning like a lost +thing round the bare walls, as if every time it woke, it went abroad +to see if there was any hope for the world; but it did not touch them; +and if through their ears it got into their dreams, it made their +sleep the sweeter, and their sense of refuge the deeper. + +But although the bewitching boy and his good dog were not lying in the +open air over against her gate, and although never a thought of murder +or theft came to trouble her, it was long before the old lady found +repose. Her heart had been deeply touched. + + + +Chapter LIII. + +The gardener. + + +From the fact that his hostess made him no answer when he breathed the +hope of a job in her garden, Clare concluded that he had presumed in +suggesting the thing to her, and that she would be relieved by their +departure. When he woke in the morning, therefore, early after a grand +sleep, he felt he had no right to linger: he had been invited to +sleep, and he had slept! He also shrank from the idea of being +supposed to expect his breakfast before he went. So, as soon as he got +up, he walked out of the gate, crossed the road, and sat down on the +spot he had occupied the night before, there to wait until the house +should be astir. For, although he could not linger within gates where +he was unknown, neither could he slink away without morning-thanks for +the gift of a warm night. + +As he sat, he grew drowsy, and leaning back, fell fast asleep. + +The thoughts of his hostess had been running on very different lines, +and she woke with feelings concerning the pauper very different from +those the pauper imagined in her. She must do something for him; she +must give or get him work! As to giving him work, her difficulty lay +in the gardener. She resolved, however, to attempt over-coming it. + +She rose earlier than usual, therefore, and as the man, who did not +sleep in the house, was not yet come, she went down to the gate to +meet him and have the thing over--so eager was she, and so nervous in +prospect of such an interview with her dreaded servant. + +“Good gracious!” she murmured aloud, “does it rain beggars?” For +there, on the same spot, lay another beggar, another boy, with a dog +in his bosom the facsimile of the ugly white thing named after +Milton's angel! She did not feel moved to go and make his +acquaintance. It could not be another of the family, could it? that +had already heard of his brother's good luck, and come to see whether +there might not be a picking for him too! She turned away hurriedly +lest he should wake, and went back to the house. + +But looking behind her as she mounted the steps, she caught sight of +the gardener at the other gate, casting a displeased look across the +road before he entered: he did not like to see tramps about! Her heart +sank a little, but she was not to be turned aside. + +The gardener came in, and his mistress joined him and walked with him +to his work, telling him as much as she thought fit concerning the +boy, and interspersing her narrative with hints of the duty of giving +every one a chance. She took care not to mention that he had come out +of a prison somewhere. + +“No one should be driven to despair,” she said, little thinking she +used almost the very words of the Lord, according to the Sinaitic +reading of a passage in St. Luke's gospel. + +The argument had little force with the rough Scotchman: his mistress +was soft-hearted! He shook his head ominously at the idea of giving a +tramp the chance of doing decent work, but at last consented, with a +show of being over-persuaded to an imprudent action, to let the boy +help him for a day, and see how he got on, stipulating, however, that +he should not be supposed to have pledged himself to anything. + +Miss Tempest's plans went beyond the gardener's scope. She had for +some months been inclined to have a boy to help in the house--an +inclination justified by a late unexpected accession of income: if +this boy were what he seemed, he would make a more than valuable +servant; and nothing could clear her judgment of him better, she +thought, than putting him to the test of a brief subjection to the +cross-grained, exacting Scotchman. By that she would soon know whether +to dismiss him, or venture with him farther! + +She had but just wrung his hard consent from the gardener, when the +cook came running, to say the boy was gone. Upon poor Miss Tempest's +heart fell a cold avalanche. + +“But we've counted the spoons, ma'am, and they're all right!” said the +cook. + +This additional statement, however, did not seem to give much +consolation to the benevolent old lady. She stood for a moment with +her eyes on the ground, too pained to move or speak. Then she started, +and ran to the gate. The cook ran after, thinking her mistress gone +out of her mind--and was sure of it when she saw her open the gate, +and run straight down the bank to the road. But when she reached the +gate herself, she saw her standing over a boy asleep on the grass of +the opposite bank. + +Abdiel, lying on his bosom, watched her with keen friendly eyes. Clare +was dreaming some agreeable morning-dream; for a smile of such +pleasure as could haunt only an innocent face, nickered on it like a +sunny ripple on the still water of a pool. + +“No!” said Miss Tempest to herself; “there's no duplicity there! +Otherwise, a tree is not known by its fruit!” + +Clare opened his eyes, and started lightly to his feet, strong and +refreshed. + +“Good morning, ma'am!” he said, pulling off his cap. + +“Good morning--what am I to call you?” she returned. + +“Clare, if you please, ma'am.” + +“What is your Christian name?” + +“That is my Christian name, ma'am--Clare.” + +“Then what is your surname?” + +“I am called Porson, ma'am, but I have another name. Mr. Porson +adopted me.” + +“What is your other name?” + +“I don't know, ma'am. I am going to know one day, I think; but the day +is not come yet.” + +He told her all he could about his adoptive parents, and little Maly; +but the time before he went to the farm was growing strangely +dreamlike, as if it had sunk a long way down in the dark waters of the +past--all up to the hour when Maly was carried away by the long black +aunt. + +The story accounted to Miss Tempest both for his good speech and the +name of his dog. The adopted child of a clergyman might well be +acquainted with _Paradise Lost_, though she herself had never read +more of it than the apostrophe to Light in the beginning of the third +book! That she had learned at school without understanding phrase or +sentence of it; while Clare never left passage alone until he +understood it, or, failing that, had invented a meaning for it. + +“Well, then, Clare, I've been talking to my gardener about you,” said +Miss Tempest. “He will give you a job.” + +“God bless you, ma'am! I'm ready!” cried Clare, stretching out his +arms, as if to get them to the proper length for work. “Where shall I +find him?” + +“You must have breakfast first.” + +She led the way to the kitchen. + +The cook, a middle-aged woman, looked at the dog, and her face +puckered all over with points of interrogation and exclamation. + +“Please, cook, will you give this young man some breakfast? He wanted +to go to work without any, but that wouldn't do--would it, cook?” said +her mistress. + +“I hope the dog won't be running in and out of my kitchen all day, +ma'am!” + +“No fear of that, cook!” said Clare; “he never leaves me.” + +“Then I don't think--I'm afraid,” she began, and stopped. “--But +that's none of my business,” she added. “John will look after his +own--and more!” + +Miss Tempest said nothing, but she almost trembled; for John, she +knew, had a perfect hatred of dogs. Nor could anyone wonder, for, gate +open or gate shut, in they came and ran over his beds. She dared not +interfere! He and Clare must settle the question of Abdiel or no +Abdiel between them! She left the kitchen. + +The cook threw the dog a crust of bread, and Abdiel, after a look at +his master, fell upon it with his white, hungry little teeth. Then she +proceeded to make a cup of coffee for Clare, casting an occasional +glance of pity at his garments, so miserably worn and rent, and his +brown bare feet. + +“How on the face of this blessed world, boy, do you expect to work in +the garden without shoes?” she said at length. + +“Most things I can do well enough without them,” answered Clare; +“--even digging, if the ground is not very hard. My feet used to be +soft, but now the soles of them are like leather.--They've grown their +own shoes,” he added, with a smile, and looked straight in her eyes. + +The smile and the look went far to win her heart, as they had won that +of her mistress: she felt them true, and wondered how such a +fair-spoken, sweet-faced boy could be on the tramp. She poured him out +a huge cup of coffee, fried him a piece of bacon, and cut him as much +bread and butter as he could dispose of. He had not often eaten +anything but dry bread, in general very dry, since he left the +menagerie, and now felt feasted like an emperor. Pleased with the +master, the cook fed the dog with equal liberality; and then, curious +to witness their reception by John, between whom and herself was +continuous feud, she conducted Clare to the gardener. From a distance +he saw them coming. With look irate fixed upon the dog, he started to +meet them. Clare knew too well the meaning of that look, and saw in +him Satan regarding Abdiel with eye of fire, and the words on his +lips-- + + “And fly, ere evil intercept thy flight.” + +The moment he came near enough, without word, or show of malice beyond +what lay in his eye, he made, with the sharp hoe he carried, a sudden +downstroke at the faithful angel, thinking to serve him as Gabriel +served Moloch. But Abdiel was too quick for him: he had read danger in +his very gait the moment he saw him move, and enmity in his eyes when +he came nearer. He kept therefore his own eyes on the hoe, and never +moved until the moment of attack. Then he darted aside. The weapon +therefore came down on the hard gravel, jarring the arm of his +treacherous enemy. With a muttered curse John followed him and made +another attempt, which Abdiel in like manner eluded. John followed and +followed; Abdiel fled and fled--never farther than a few yards, +seeming almost to entice the man's pursuit, sometimes pirouetting on +his hind legs to escape the blows which the gardener, growing more and +more furious with failure, went on aiming at him. Fruitlessly did +Clare assure him that neither would the dog do any harm, nor allow any +one to hit him. It was from very weariness that at last he desisted, +and wiping his forehead with his shirt-sleeve, turned upon Clare in +the smothered wrath that knows itself ridiculous. For all the time the +cook stood by, shaking with delighted laughter at his every fresh +discomfiture. + +“Awa', ye deil's buckie,” he cried, “an tak' the little Sawtan wi' ye! +Dinna lat me see yer face again.” + +“But the lady told me you would give me a job!” said Clare. + +“I didna tell her I wad gie yer tyke a job! I wad though, gien he wad +lat me!” + +“He's given you a stiff one!” said the cook, and laughed again. + +The gardener took no notice of her remark. + +“Awa' wi' ye!” he cried again, yet more wrathfully, “--or--” + +He raised his hand. + +Clare looked in his eyes and did not budge. + +“For shame, John!” expostulated the cook. “Would you strike a child?” + +“I'm no child, cook!” said Clare. “He can't hurt me much. I've had a +good breakfast!” + +“Lat 'im tak' awa' that deevil o' a tyke o' his, as I tauld him,” + thundered the gardener, “or I'll mak' a pulp o' 'im!” + +“I've had such a breakfast, sir, as I'm bound to give a whole day's +work in return for,” said Clare, looking up at the angry man; “and I +won't stir till I've done it. Stolen food on my stomach would turn me +sick!” + +“Gien it did, it wadna be the first time, I reckon!” said the +gardener. + +“It _would_ be the first time!” returned Clara “You are very rude.--If +Abdiel understood Scotch, he would bite you,” he added, as the dog, +hearing his master speak angrily, came up, ears erect, and took his +place at his side, ready for combat. + +“Ye'll hae to tak' some ither mode o' payin' the debt!” said John. +“Stick spaud in yird here, ye sall not! You or I maun flit first!” + +With that he walked slowly away, shouldering his hoe. + +“Come, Abdiel,” said Clare; “we must go and tell Miss Tempest! Perhaps +she'll find something else for us to do. If she can't, she'll forgive +us our breakfast, and we'll be off on the tramp again. I thought we +were going to have a day's rest--I mean work; that's the rest we want! +But this man is an enemy to the poor.” + +The gardener half turned, as if he would speak, but changed his mind +and went his way. + +“Never mind John!” said the cook, loud enough for John to hear. “He's +an old curmudgeon as can't sleep o' nights for quarrellin' inside +him. I'll go to mis'ess, and you go and sit down in the kitchen till I +come to you.” + + + +Chapter LIV. + +The Kitchen. + + +Clare went into the kitchen, and sat down. The housemaid came in, and +stood for a moment looking at him. Then she asked him what he wanted +there. + +“Cook told me to wait here,” he answered. + +“Wait for what?” + +“Till she came to me. She's gone to speak to Miss Tempest.” + +“I won't have that dog here.” + +“When I had a home,” remarked Clare, “our servant said the cook was +queen of the kitchen: I don't want to be rude, ma'am, but I must do as +she told me.” + +“She never told you to bring that mangy animal in here!” + +“She knew he would follow me, and she said nothing about him. But he's +not mangy. He hasn't enough to eat to be mangy. He's as lean as a +dried fish!” + +The housemaid, being fat, was inclined to think the remark personal; +but Clare looked up at her with such clear, honest, simple eyes, that +she forgot the notion, and thought what a wonderfully nice boy he +looked. + +“He's shamefully poor, though! His clothes ain't even decent!” she +remarked to herself. + +And certainly the white skin did look through in several places. + +“You won't let him put his nose in anything, will you?” she said quite +gently, returning his smile with a very pleasant one of her own. + +“Abdiel is too much of a gentleman to do it,” he answered. + +“A dog a gentleman!” rejoined the housemaid with a merry laugh, +willing to draw him out. + +“Abdiel can be hungry and not greedy,” answered Clare, and the young +woman was silent. + +Miss Tempest and Mrs. Mereweather had all this time been turning over +the question of what was to be done with the strange boy. They agreed +it was too bad that anyone willing to work should be prevented from +earning even a day's victuals by the bad temper of a gardener. But his +mistress did not want to send the man away. She had found him +scrupulously honest, as is many a bad-tempered man, and she did not +like changes. The cook on her part had taken such a fancy to Clare +that she did not want him set to garden-work; she would have him at +once into the house, and begin training him for a page. Now Miss +Tempest was greatly desiring the same thing, but in dread of what the +cook would say, and was delighted, therefore, when the first +suggestion of it came from Mrs. Mereweather herself. The only obstacle +in the cook's eyes was that same long, spectral dog. The boy could not +be such a fool, however,--she said, not being a lover of animals--as +let a wretched beast like that come betwixt him and a good situation! + +“It's all right, Clare,” said Mrs. Mereweather, entering her queendom +so radiant within that she could not repress the outshine of her +pleasure. “Mis'ess an' me, we've arranged it all. You're to help me in +the kitchen; an' if you can do what you're told, an' are willin' to +learn, we'll soon get you out of your troubles. There's but one thing +in the way.” + +“What is it, please?” asked Clare. + +“The dog, of course! You must part with the dog.” + +“That I cannot do,” returned Clare quietly, but with countenance +fallen and sorrowful. “--Come, Abdiel!” + +The dog started up, every hair of him full of electric vitality. + +“You don't mean you're going to walk yourself off in such a beastly +ungrateful fashion--an' all for a miserable cur!” exclaimed the cook. + +“The lady has been most kind to us, and we're grateful to her, and +ready to work for her if she will let us;--ain't we, Abdiel? But +Abdiel has done far more for me than Miss Tempest! To part with +Abdiel, and leave him to starve, or get into bad company, would be +sheer ingratitude. I should be a creature such as Miss Tempest ought +to have nothing to do with: I might serve her as that young butler I +told her of! It's just as bad to be ungrateful to a dog as to any +other person. Besides, he wouldn't leave me. He would be always +hanging about.” + +“John would soon knock him on the head.” + +“Would he, Abdiel?” said Clare. + +The dog looked up in his master's face with such a comical answer in +his own, that the cook burst out laughing, and began to like Abdiel. + +“But you don't really mean to say,” she persisted, “that you'd go off +again on the tramp, to be as cold and hungry again to-morrow as you +were yesterday--and all for the sake of a dog? A dog ain't a +Christian!” + +“Abdiel's more of a Christian than some I know,” answered Clare: “he +does what his master tells him.” + +“There's something in that!” said the cook. + +“If I parted with Abdiel, I could never hold up my head among the +angels,” insisted Clare. “Think what harm it might do him! He could +trust nobody after, his goodness might give way! He might grow worse +than Tommy!--No; I've got to take care of Abdiel, and Abdiel's got to +take care of me!--'Ain't you, Abby?” + +“We can't have him here in the kitchen nohow!” said the cook in +relenting tone. + +“Poor fellow!” said the housemaid kindly. + +The dog turned to her and wagged his tail + +“What wouldn't I give for a lover like that!” said the housemaid--but +whether of Clare or the dog I cannot say. + +“I know what I shall do!” cried Clare, in sudden resolve. “I will ask +Miss Tempest to have him up-stairs with her, and when she is tired of +either of us, we will go away together.” + +“A probable thing!” returned the cook. “A lady like Miss Tempest with +a dog like that about her! She'd be eaten up alive with fleas! In ten +minutes she would!” + +“No fear of that!” rejoined Clare. “Abdiel catches all his _own_ +fleas!--Don't you, Abby?” + +The dog instantly began to burrow in his fell of hair--an answer which +might be taken either of two ways: it might indicate comprehension and +corroboration of his master, or the necessity for a fresh hunt. The +women laughed, much amused. + +“Look here!” said Clare. “Let me have a tub of water--warm, if you +please--he likes that: I tried him once, passing a factory, where a +lot of it was running to waste. Then, with the help of a bit of soap, +I'll show you a body of hair to astonish you.” + +“What breed is he?” asked the housemaid. + +“He's all the true breeds under the sun, I fancy,” returned his +master; “but the most of him seems of the sky-blue terrier sort.” + +The more they talked with Clare, the better the women liked him. They +got him a tub and plenty of warm water. Abdiel was nothing loath to be +plunged in, and Clare washed him thoroughly. Taken out and dried, he +seemed no more for a lady's chamber unmeet. + +“Now,” said Clare, “will you please ask Miss Tempest if I may bring +him on to the lawn, and show her some of his tricks?” + +The good lady was much pleased with the cleverness and instant +obedience of the little animal. Clare proposed that she should keep +him by her. + +“But will he stay with me? and will he do what _I_ tell him?” she +asked. + +Clare took the dog aside, and talked to him. He told him what he was +going to do, and what he expected of him. How much Abdiel understood, +who can tell! but when his master laid him down at Miss Tempest's +feet, there he lay; and when Clare went with the cook, he did not +move, though he cast many a wistful glance after the lord of his +heart. When his new mistress went into the house, he followed her +submissively, his head hanging, and his tail motionless. He soon +recovered his cheerfulness, however, and seemed to know that his +friend had not abandoned him. + + + +Chapter LV. + +The wheel rests for a time. + + +That part of the human race which is fond of dolls, may now imagine +the pleasure of the cook in going to the town in the omnibus to buy +everything for a live doll so big as Clare! In a very few days she had +him dressed to her heart's content, and the satisfaction of her +mistress, who would not have him in livery, but in a plain suit of +dark blue cloth: for she loved blue, all her men-people being, or +having been in the navy. Thus dressed, he looked as much of a +gentleman as before: his look of refinement had owed nothing to the +contrast of his rags. Better clothes make not a few seem commoner. + +When Mrs. Mereweather came back from the town the first day, she found +that the ragged boy had got her kitchen and scullery as nice and +clean, and everything as ready to her hand, as if she had got her work +done before she went, which the omnibus would not permit. This +rejoiced her much; but being a woman of experience, she continued a +little anxious lest his sweet ways should go after his rags, lest his +new garments should breed bumptiousness and bad manners. For such a +change is no unfrequent result of prosperity. But such had been +Mr. Porson's teaching and example, such Mrs. Person's management, and +such the responsiveness of the boy's disposition, that the thought +never came to him whether this or that was a thing fit for him to do: +if the thing was a right thing, and had to be done, why should not he +do it as well as another! To earn his own and Abdiel's bread, he would +do anything honest, setting up his back at nothing. But when about a +thing, he forgot even his obligation to do it, in the glad endeavour +to do it well. + +As the days went on, Mrs. Mereweather was not once disappointed in +him. He did everything with such a will that both she and the +housemaid were always ready to spare and help him. Very soon they +began to grow tender over him; and on pretence of his being the +earlier drest to open the door, did certain things themselves which he +had been quite content to do, but which they did not like seeing him +do. Many--I am afraid most boys would have presumed on their +generosity, but Clare was nowise injured by it. + +Nothing could be kinder than the way his mistress treated him. Having +lent him some books, and at once perceived that he was careful of +them, she let him have the run of her library when his day's work was +over. For he not only read but respected books. Nothing shows +vulgarity more than the way in which some people treat books. No +gentleman would write his remarks on the margins of another person's +book; no lady would brush her hair as she read one of her own. + +From hungry days and cold nights, Clare and Abdiel found themselves +_in clover_--the phrase surely of some lover of cows!--and they were +more than content. Clare had longed so much for work, and had for so +many a weary day sought it in vain, that he valued it now just because +it was work. And he seemed to know instinctively that a man ranks, not +according to the thing he does, but according to the way he does +it. In life it is far higher to do an inferior thing well than to do a +superior thing passably. + +Clare made good use of his privileges, and read much, educating +himself none the worse that he did it unconsciously. He read whatever +came in his way. He read really--not as most people read, leaving the +sentences behind them like so many unbroken nuts, the kernel of whose +meaning they have not seen. He learned more than most boys at school, +more even than most young men at college; for it is not what one +knows, but what one uses, that is the true measure of learning. +Whatever he read, he read from the point of practice. In history or +romance he saw--not merely what a man ought to be or do, but what he +himself must, at that moment, be or do. There is a very common sort of +man calling himself practical, but neglecting to practise the most +important things, who would laugh at the idea of Clare being +practical, seeing he did not trouble his head about money, or “getting +on in the world”--what servants call “bettering themselves;” but such +a practical man will find he has been but a practical fool. Clare took +heed to do what was right, and grow a better man. Such a life is the +only really practical one. + +People wondered how Miss Tempest had managed to get hold of such a +nice-looking page, and the good lady was flattered by their +wonder. But she knew the world too well to be sure of him yet. She +knew that it is difficult, in the human tree, to distinguish between +blossom and fruit. Deeds of lovely impulse are the blossom; unvarying, +determined Tightness is the fruit. + + + +Chapter LVI. + +Strategy. + + +Miss Tempest was the last of an old family, with scarce a relation, +and no near one, in the world. Hence the pieces of personal property +that had continued in the possession of various branches of the family +after land and money, through fault or misfortune, were gone, had +mostly drifted into the small pool of Miss Tempest's life now slowly +sinking in the sands of time, there to gleam and sparkle out their +tale of its old splendour. She did not think often of their +money-worth: had she done so, she would have kept them at her +banker's; but she valued them greatly both for their beauty and their +associations, constantly using as many of them as she could. More than +one of her friends had repeatedly tried to persuade her that it was +not prudent to have so much plate and so many jewels in the house, for +the fact was sure to be known where it was least desirable it should: +she always said she would think about it. At times she would for a +moment contemplate sending her valuables to the bank; but her next +thought--by no means an unwise one--would always be, “Of what use will +they be at the bank? I might as well not have them at all! Better sell +them and do some good with the money!--No; I must have them about me!” + +There are predatory persons in every large town, who either know or +are learning to know the houses in it worth the risk of robbing. When +it falls to the lot of this or that house to be attempted, one of the +gang will make the acquaintance of some servant in it, with the object +of discovering beforehand where its treasure lies, and so reducing the +time to be spent in it, and the risk of frustration or capture. Often +they seduce one of the household to let them in, or hand out the +things they want. Any such gang, however, must soon have become +convinced that at Miss Tempest's corruption was impossible, and that +they could avail themselves solely of their own internal resources. + +It was well now for Miss Tempest that she was so faithful herself as +to encourage faithfulness in others: gladly would she have had Abdiel +sleep in her room, but she would not take the pleasure of his company +from his old master and companion in suffering. The dog therefore +slept on Clare's bed, just as he did when the bed was as hard to +define as to lie upon, only now he had to take the part neither of +blanket nor hot bottle. + +One night, about half-past twelve, watchful even in slumber, he sprang +up in his lair at his master's feet, listened a moment, gave a low +growl, again listened, and gave another growl. Clare woke, and found +his bed trembling with the tremor of his little four-footed +guardian. Telling him to keep quiet, he rose on his elbow, and in his +turn listened, but could hear nothing. He thought then he would light +his candle and go down, but concluded it wiser to descend without a +light, and listen under cloak of the darkness. If he could but save +Miss Tempest from a fright! He crept out of bed, and went first to the +window--a small one in the narrowing of the gable-wall of his attic +room: the night was warm, and, loving the night air, he had it +open. Hearkening there for a moment, he thought he heard a slight +movement below. Very softly he put out his head, and looked +down. There was no moon, but in the momentary flash of a lantern he +caught sight of a small pair of legs disappearing inside the scullery +window, which was almost under his own. Swift and noiseless he hurried +down, and reached the scullery door just in time for a little fellow +who came stealing out of it, to run against him. + +Now Clare had heard the housemaid read enough from the newspapers to +guess, the moment he looked from the garret window, that the legs he +saw were those of a boy sent in to open a door or window, and when the +boy, feeling his way in the dark, came against him, he gripped him by +the throat with the squeeze that used to silence Tommy. The prowler +knew the squeeze. The moment Clare relaxed it, in a piping whisper +came the words, + +“Clare! Clare! they said they'd kill me if I didn't!” + +“Didn't what?” + +“Open the door to them.” + +“If you utter one whimper, I'll throttle you,” said Clare. + +He tightened his grasp for an instant, and Tommy, who had not +forgotten that what Clare said, he did, immediately gave in, and was +led away. Clare took him in his arms and carried him to his room, tied +him hand and foot, and left him on the floor, fast to the bedstead. +Then he crept swiftly to the servants' room, and with some difficulty +waking them, told them what he had done, and asked them to help him. + +Both women of sense and courage, they undertook at once to do their +part. But when he proposed that they should open a window, as if it +were done by Tommy, and so enticing the burglars to enter, secure the +first of them, they, naturally enough, and wisely too, declined to +encounter the risk. + +The burglars, perplexed by the lack of any sign from Tommy yet the +utter quiet of the house, concluded probably that he had fallen +somewhere, and was lying either insensible, or unable to move and +afraid to cry out--in which case they would be at the mercy of what he +might say when he was found. + +Those within could hear as little noise without. They went from door +to window, wherever an attempt might be made, but all was still. Then +it occurred to Clare that he had left the scullery window +unwatched. He hastened to it--and was but just in time: two long thin +legs were sticking through, and showed by their movements that +considerable effort was being made by the body that belonged to them, +to enter after them. Legs first was the wrong way, but the youth +feared the unknown fate of Tommy, and being pig-headed, would go that +way or not at all. + +A boy in courage equal to Clare, but of less coolness, would at once +have made war on the intrusive legs; but Clare bethought him that, so +long as that body filled the window, no other body could pass that +way; so it would be well to keep it there, a cork to the house, making +it like the nest of a trap-door-spider. He begged the women, +therefore, who had followed him, to lay hold each of an ankle, and +stick to it like a clamp, while he ran to get some string. + +The women, entering heartily into the business, held on bravely. The +owner of the legs made vigorous efforts to release them, more anxious +a good deal to get out than he had been to get in, but he was not very +strong, and had no scope. His accomplices laid hold of him and pulled; +then, with good mother-wit, the women pulled away from each other, and +so made of his legs a wedge. + +Clare came back with a piece of clothes-line, one end of which he +slipped with a running knot round one ankle, and the other in like +fashion round the other. Then he cut the line in halves, and drawing +them over two hooks in the ceiling, some distance apart, so that the +legs continued widespread like a V upside down, hauled the feet up as +high as he could, and fastened the ends of the lines. Hold lines and +hooks, it was now impossible to draw the fellow out. + +Leaving the women to watch, and telling them to keep a hand on each of +the lines because the scullery was pitch-dark, he went next to his +room and looked again from the window. He feared they might be trying +to get in at some other place, for they would not readily abandon +their accomplices, and doubtless knew what a small household it was! +He would see first, therefore, what was doing outside the scullery, +and then make a round of doors and windows! + +Right under him when he looked out, stood a short, burly figure; +another man was taking intermittent hauls at the arms of their +leg-tied companion, regardless of his stifled cries of pain when he +did so. Clare went and fetched his water-jug, which was half full, and +leaning out once more, with the jug upright in his two hands, moved it +this way and that until he had it, as nearly as he could determine, +just over the man beneath him, and then dropped it. The jug fell +plumb, and might have killed the man but that he bent his head at the +moment, and received it between his shoulders. It knocked the breath +out of him, and he lay motionless. The other man fled. The +window-stopper, hearing the crash of the jug, wrenched and kicked and +struggled, but in vain. There he had to wait the sunrise, for not a +moment sooner would the cook open the door. + +When they went out at last, the stout man too was gone. He had risen +and staggered into the shrubbery, and there fallen, but had risen once +more and got away. + +Their captive pretended to be all but dead, thinking to move their +pity and be set free. But Clare went to the next house and got the +man-servant there to go for the police, begging him to make haste: he +knew that his tender-hearted mistress, if she came down before the +police arrived, would certainly let the fellow go, and Tommy with him; +and he was determined the law should have its way if he could compass +it What hope was there for the wretched Tommy if he was allowed to +escape! And what right had they to let such people loose on their +neighbours! It was selfishness to indulge one's own pity to the danger +of others! He would be his brother's keeper by holding on to his +brother's enemy! + +Going at last to his room, he found Tommy asleep. The boy was better +dressed, but no cleaner than when first he knew him. Clare proceeded +to wash and dress. Tommy woke, and lay staring, but did not utter a +sound. + +“Have your sleep out,” said Clare. “The police won't be here, I +daresay, for an hour yet.” + +“I believe you!” returned Tommy, as impudent as ever. His +contemplation of Clare had revived his old contempt for him. “I mean +to go. I 'ain't done nothing.” + +“Go, then,” said Clare, and took no more heed of him. + +“If it's manners you want, Clare,” resumed Tommy, “_please_ let me +go!” + +Clare turned and looked at him. The evil expression was hardened on +his countenance. He gave him no answer. + +“You ain't never agoin' to turn agin an old pal, aire you?” said +Tommy. + +“I ain't a pal of yours, Tommy, or of any other thief's!” answered +Clare. + +“I'll take my oath on it to the beak!” + +“You'll soon have the chance; I've sent for the police.” Tommy changed +his tone. + +“Please, Clare, let me go,” he whined. + +“I will not. I did what I could for you before, and I'll do what I can +for you now. You must go with the police.” + +Tommy began to blubber, or pretend--Clare could not tell which. + +“This beastly string's a cuttin' into me!” he sobbed. + +Clare examined it, and found it easy enough. + +“I won't undo one knot,” he answered, “until there's a policeman in +the room. If you make a noise, I will stuff your mouth.” + +His dread was that his mistress might hear, and spoil all. “It's her +house,” he said to himself, “but they're my captives!” + +Tommy lay still, and the police came. + +When they untied and drew out the cork of the scullery window, Clare +thought he had seen him before, but could not remember where. One of +the policemen, however, the moment his eyes fell on his face, cried +out joyfully, + +“Ah, ha, my beauty! I've been a lookin' for you!” + +“Never set eyes on ye afore,” growled the fellow. + +“Don't ye say now ye ain't a dear friend o' mine,” insisted the +policeman, “when I carry yer pictur' in my bosom!” + +He drew out a pocket-book, and from it a photograph, at which he gazed +with satisfaction, comparing it with the face before him. In another +moment Clare recognized the lad sent by Maidstone to exchange +band-boxes with him. + +“Her majesty the queen wants you for that robbery, you know!” said the +policeman. + +A boy who loved romance and generosity more than truth and +righteousness, would now have regretted the chance he had lost of +doing a fine action, and sought yet to set the rascal free. There are +men who cheat and make presents; there are men who are saints abroad +and churls at home, as Bunyan says; there are men who screw down the +wages of their clerks and leave vast sums to the poor; men who build +churches with the proceeds of drunkenness; men who promote bubble +companies and have prayers in their families morning and evening; men, +in a word, who can be very generous with what is not their own; for +nothing ill-gotten is a man's own any more than the money in a thief's +pocket: Clare was not of the contemptible order of the falsely +generous. + +Profiting, doubtless, by Maidstone's own example, the fellow had, as +Clare now learned, run away from his master, carrying with him the +contents of the till: whether he deserved punishment more than his +master, may be left undiscussed. + +When first Miss Tempest's friends heard of the attempt to break into +her house, they said--what could she expect if she took tramps into +her service! They were consider-ably astonished, however, when they +read in the newspaper the terms in which the magistrate had spoken of +the admirable courage and contrivance of Miss Tempest's page, and the +resolution with which the women of her household had seconded him. If +every third house were as well defended, he said, the crime of +burglary would disappear. + +After the trial, Clare begged and was granted an interview with the +magistrate. He told him what he knew about Tommy, and entreated he +might be sent to some reformatory, to be kept from bad company until +he was able to distinguish between right and wrong, which he thought +he hardly could at present The magistrate promised it should be done, +and with kind words dismissed him. + +Things returned to their old way at Miss Tempest's. Her friends never +doubted she would now at last commit her plate to her banker's strong +room, but they found themselves mistaken: she was convinced that, with +such servants and Abdiel, it was safe where it was. + +The leader of the gang, injured by Clare's water-jug, was soon after +captured, and the gang was broken up. + + + +Chapter LVII. + +Ann Shotover. + + +So void of self-assertion was Clare, so prompt at the call of whoever +needed him, so quiet yet so quick, so silent in his sympathetic +ministrations, so studious and so capable, that, after two years, Miss +Tempest began to feel she ought to do what she could to “advance his +prospects,” even at the loss to herself of his services. + +He never came to regard Miss Tempest as he did the other women who had +saved him: he never thought of her as his fourth mother. Truly good +and kind she was, but she had a certain manner which prevented him +from feeling entirely comfortable with her. It did not escape him, +however, that Abdiel was thoroughly at his ease in her company; and he +believed therefore that the dog knew her better, or at least was more +just to her, than he. + +The fact was Miss Tempest kept down all her feelings, with a vague +sense that to show them would be to waste her substance: it was the +one shape that the yet lingering selfishness of a very unselfish +person took. Thus she kept him at a distance, and he stayed at a +distance, she on her part wondering that he did not open out to her +more, but neither doubting that all was right between them. Nothing, +indeed, was wrong--only they might have come a little nearer. Perhaps, +also, Miss Tempest was a little too conscious of being his patroness, +his earthly saviour. + +It was natural that, after the defeated robbery, Clare should become a +little known to the friends of the mistress he had so well served; +when, therefore, Miss Tempest spoke to her banker concerning the +ability of her page, mentioning that, in his spare time, he had been +reading hard, as well as attending an evening-school for mathematics, +where he gained much approbation from his master, she spoke of one +already known by him to one accustomed to regard character. + +The banker listened with a solemn listening from which she could not +tell what he was thinking. No one ever could tell what Mr. Shotover +was thinking: his face was not half a face; it was more a mask than a +face. High in the world's regard, rich, and of unquestioned integrity, +he was believed to have gathered a large fortune; but he kept his +affairs to himself. That he liked his own way so much as never to +yield it, I give up to the admiration of such as himself: often +kind--when the required mode of the kindness pleased him, a constant +church-goer and giver of money, always saying less the more he made up +his mind, he had generally no trouble in getting it. + +Priding himself on his moral discrimination, he had, now and then, as +suited his need, taken from a lower position a young man he thought +would serve his purpose, and modelled him to it. He had had his eye on +Clare ever since reading the magistrate's eulogy of his contrivance +and courage; but when Miss Tempest spoke, he had not made up his mind +about him, for something in the boy repelled him. He had scarcely +troubled himself to ask what it was, nor do I believe he could have +discovered, for the root of the repulsion lay in himself. + +Moved in part, however, by the representations of Miss Tempest, in +part also, I think, by a desire to discover that the boy was a +hypocrite, Mr. Shotover consented to give him a trial, whereupon Miss +Tempest made haste to disclose to her _protegé_ the grand thing she +had done for him. + +She was disappointed at the coolness and lack of interest with which +Clare heard her great news. She could not but be gratified that he did +not want to leave her, but she was annoyed that he seemed unaware of +any advantage to be gained in doing so--high as the social ascent from +servitude to clerkship would by most be considered. But Clare's +horizon was not that of the world. He had no inclination to more of +figures and less of persons. Miss Tempest, however, insisting that she +knew what was best for him, and what it was therefore his duty to do, +he listened in respectful silence to all she had to say. But what she +counted her most powerful argument--that he owed it to himself to rise +in the world--did not even touch him, did not move the slightest +response in a mind nobly devoid of ambition. Her argument was in truth +nonsense; for a man owes himself nothing, owes God everything, and +owes his neighbour whatever his own conscience goes on to require of +him for his neighbour. Feeling at the same time, however, that she had +a huge claim on his compliance with her wishes, Clare consented to +leave her kitchen for her friend's bank, where he had of course to +take the lowest position, one counted by the rest of the clerks, +especially the one just out of it, _menial_, requiring him to be in +the bank earlier by half an hour than the others, to be the last to go +away at night, and to sleep in the house--where a not uncomfortable +room in the attic story was appointed him. + +Mr. Shotover himself lived above the bank--with his family, consisting +of his wife and two daughters. Mrs. Shotover suffered from a terrible +disease--that of thinking herself ill when nothing was the matter with +her except her paramount interest in herself--the source of at least +half the incurable disease among idle people. The elder daughter was a +high-spirited girl about twenty, with a frank, friendly manner, +indicating what God meant her to be, not what she was, or had yet +chosen to be. She was not really frank, and seemed far more friendly +than she was, being more selfish than she knew, and far more selfish +than she seemed: she was merry, and that goes a great way in +seeming. Her mother spent no regard upon her; her heart was too full +of herself to have in it room for a grown-up daughter as well, with +interests of her own. The younger was a child about six, of whom the +mother took not so much care by half as a tigress of her cub. + +One morning, a little before eight o'clock, as Clare was coming down +from his room to open the windows of the bank, he just saved himself +from tumbling over something on the attic stair, which was dark, and +at that point took rather a sharp turn. The something was a child, who +gave a low cry, and started up to run away: there was not light enough +for either to discern easily what the other was like. But Clare, to +whom childhood was the strongest attraction he yet knew, bent down his +face from where he stood on the step above her, and its moonlight glow +of love and faith shone clear in the eyes of the little girl. The +moment she saw his smile, she knew the soul that was the light of the +smile, and her doll dropped from her hands as she raised them to lay +her arms gently about his neck. + +“Oh!” she said, “you're come!” + +He saw now, in the dusk, a pale, ordinary little face, with rather +large gray eyes, a rather characterless, tiny, up-turned nose, and a +rather pretty mouth. + +“Yes, little one. Were you expecting me?” he returned, with his arms +about her. + +“Yes,” she answered, in the tone of one stating what the other must +know. + +“How was it I frightened you, then?” + +“Only at first I thought you was an ogre! That was before I saw +you. Then I knew!” + +“Who told you I was coming?” + +“Nobody. Nobody knew you was coming but me. I've known it--oh, for +such a time!--ever since I was born, I think!” + +She turned her head a little and looked down where the doll lay a step +or two below. + +“You can go now, dolly,” she said. “I don't want you any more.” Here +she paused a while, as if listening to a reply, then went on: “I am +much obliged to you, dolly; but what am I to do with you? You won't +never speak! It has made me quite sad many a time, you know very well! +But you can't help it! So go away, please, and be nobody, for you +never would be anybody! I did my best to get you to be somebody, but +you wouldn't! Thank you all the same! I will take you and put you +where you can be as dull as you please, and nobody will mind.”--Here +she left Clare, went down, and lifted her plaything.--“Dolly, dolly,” + she resumed, “he's come! I knew he would! And you don't know it +because you're nobody!” + +Without looking back, or a word of adieu to Clare, she went slowly +down the steps, one by one, with the doll in her arms, manifesting for +it neither contempt nor tenderness. Many a child would have carried +the discrowned favourite by one leg; she carried her in both hands. + +Clare waited a while on the narrow, closed-in, wooden stair, not a +little wondering, and full of thought. His wonder, however, had no +puzzlement in it. The child's behaviour involved no difficulty. The +two existences came together, and each understood the other in virtue +of its essential nature. In after years Clare could put the thing into +such words; he sought none at the time. The child was lonely. She had +done her best with her doll, but it had failed her. It was not +companionable. The moment she looked in Clare's face, she knew that he +loved her, and that she had been waiting for _him_! She was not +surprised to see him; how should it be otherwise than just so! He was +come: good bye, dolly! The child had imagination--next to conscience +the strongest ally of common sense. She knew, like St. Paul, that an +idol is nothing. As men and women grow in imagination and common +sense, more and more will sacred silly dolls be cast to the moles and +the bats. But pretty Fancy and limping Logic are powerful usurpers in +commonplace minds. + +Clare saw nothing more of her that day, neither tried to see her; but +he did his work in an atmosphere of roses. The work was not nearly so +interesting as house-work, but Clare was an honest gentleman, +therefore did it well: that it was not interesting was of no account; +it was his work! But to know that a child was in the house, not merely +a child for him to love, but a child that already loved him so that he +could be her servant indeed, changed the stupid bank almost into the +dome of the angels. + +His fellow clerks took little notice of him beyond what, in the +routine of the day, was unavoidable. He had been a page-boy: the less +they did with him the better! Were they not wronged by his +introduction into their company? The poorest creature of them believed +he would have served out the burglars better if the chance had been +his. + + + +Chapter LVIII. + +Child-talk. + + +As Clare came down the next morning but one, there was the child again +on the dark narrow stair. She had no doll. Her hands lay folded in her +lap. She sat on the same step, the very image of child-patience. As he +approached she did not move. I believe she held solemn revel of +expectation. He laid his hand on the whitey-brown hair smoothed flat +on her head with a brush dipped in water. Not much dressing was wasted +on Ann--common little name! + +She rose, turned to him, and again laid her arms about his neck. No +kiss followed: she had not been taught to kiss. + +“Where's dolly?” asked Clare. + +“Nowhere. Buried,” answered the child. + +“Where did you bury her? In the garden?” + +“No. The garden wouldn't be nowhere!” + +“Where, then?” + +“Nowhere. I threw her out of the window.” + +“Into the street?” + +“Yes. She did fell on a horse's back, and he jumped. I was sorry.” + +“It didn't hurt him. I hope it didn't hurt dolly!” + +The moment he said it, Clare's heart reproached him: he was not +talking true! he was not talking out of his real heart to the child! +Almost with indignation she answered:-- + +“_Things_ don't be hurt! Dolly was a thing! She's _no_ thing now!” + +“Why?” + +“Because she fell under the horse, and was seen no more.” + +“Is she old enough,” thought Clare, “to read the Pilgrim's Progress?” + +“Will you tell me, please,” he said, “_when_ a thing is only a thing?” + +“When it won't mind what you do or say to it.” + +“And when is a thing no thing any more?” + +“When you never think of it again.” + +“Is a fly a thing?” + +“I _could_ make a fly mind, only it would hurt it!” + +“Of course we wouldn't do that!” + +“No; we don't want to make a fly mind. It's not one of our creatures.” + +Clare thought that was far enough in metaphysics for one morning. + +“I waited for you yesterday,” he said, “but you didn't come!” + +“Dolly didn't like to be buried. I mean, I didn't like burying +dolly. I cried and wouldn't come.” + +“Then why did you bury dolly?” + +“She _had_ to be buried. I told you she couldn't _be_ anybody! So I +_made_ her be buried.” + +“I see! I quite understand.--But what have you to amuse yourself with +now?” + +“I don't want to be mused now. You's come! I'm growed up!” + +“Yes, of course!” answered Clare; but he was puzzled what to say next. + +What could he do for her? Glad would he have been to take her down to +the sea, or to the docks, or into the country somewhere, till +dinner-time, and then after dinner take her out again! But there was +his work--ugly, stupid work that had to be done, as dolly _had_ to be +buried! Alas for the child who has discarded her toys, and is suddenly +growed up! What is she to do with herself? Clare's coming had caused +the loss of Ann's former interests: he felt bound to make up to her +for that loss. But how? It was a serious question, and not being his +own master, he could not in a moment answer it. + +“I wish I could stay with you all day!” he said. “But your papa wants +me in the bank. I must go.” + +Clare had not had a good sight of the child, and was at a loss to +think what must be her age. Her language, both in form and utterance, +was partly precise and _grown-up_, and partly childish; but her wisdom +was child-like--and that is the opposite both of precise and +childish. It was the wisdom that comes of unity between thought and +action. + +“Is there anything I can do for you before I go--for I must go?” said +Clare. + +“Who says _must_ to you? Nurse says _must_ to me.” + +“Your papa says _must_ to me.” + +“If you didn't say _yes_ when papa said _must_, what would come next?” + +“He would say, 'Go out of my house, and never come in again.'” + +“And would you do it?” + +“I must: the house is his, not mine.” + +“If I didn't say _yes_ when papa said _must_, what would happen?” + +“He would try to make you say it.” + +“And if I wouldn't, would he say, 'Go out of my house and never come +in again'?” + +“No; you are his little girl!” + +“Then I think he shouldn't say it to you.--What is your name?” + +“Clare.” + +“Then, Clare, if my papa sends you out of his house, I will go with +you.--You wouldn't turn me out, would you, when I was a _little_ +naughty?” + +“No; neither would your papa.” + +“If he turned you out, it would be all the same. Where you go, I will +go. I must, you know! Would you mind if he said 'Go away'?” + +“I should be very sorry to leave you.” + +“Yes, but that's not going to be! Why do you stay with papa? Were you +in the house always--ever so long before I saw you?” + +“No; a very little while only.” + +“Did you come in from the street?” + +“Yes; I came in from the street. Your papa pays me to work for him.” + +“And if you wouldn't?” + +“Then I should have no money, and nothing to eat, and nowhere to sleep +at night.” + +“Would that make you uncomfable?” + +“It would make me die.” + +“Have you a papa?” + +“Yes, but he's far away.” + +“You could go to him, couldn't you?” + +“One day I shall.” + +“Why don't you go now, and take me?” + +“Because he died.” + +“What's _died_?” + +“Went away out of sight, where we can't go to look for him till we go +out of sight too.” + +“When will that be?” + +“I don't know.” + +“Does anybody know?” + +“Nobody.” + +“Then perhaps you will never go?” + +“We must go; it's only that nobody knows when.” + +“I think the when that nobody knows, mayn't never come.--Is that why +you have to work?” + +“Everybody has to work one way or another.” + +“I haven't to work!” + +“If you don't work when you're old enough, you'll be miserable.” + +“_You're_ not old enough.” + +“Oh, yes, indeed I am! I've been working a long time now.” + +“Where? Not for papa?” + +“No; not for papa.” + +“Why not? Why didn't you come sooner? Why didn't you come _much_ +sooner--_ever_ so much sooner? Why did you make me wait for you all +the time?” + +“Nobody ever told me you were waiting.” + +“Nobody ever told me you were coming, but I knew.” + +“You had to wait for me, and you knew. I had to wait for you, and I +didn't know! When we have time, I will tell you all about myself, and +how I've been waiting too.” + +“Waiting for me?” + +“No.” + +“Who for?” + +“For my father and mother--and somebody else, I think.” + +“That's me.” + +“No; I'm waiting yet. I didn't know I was coming to you till I came, +and there you were!” + +The child was silent for a moment. Then she said thoughtfully, + +“You will tell me _all_ about yourself! That _will_ be nice!--Can you +tell stories?” she added. “--Of course you can! You can do +_every_thing!” + +“Oh, no, I can't!” + +“Can't you?” + +“No; I can do _some_ things--not many. I can love you, little +one!--Now I must go, or I shall be late, and nobody ever ought to be +late.” + +“Go then. I will go to my nursery and wait again.” + +She went down the stair without once looking behind her. Clare +followed. On the next floor she went one way to her nursery, and he +another to the back-stairs. + +One of the causes and signs of Clare's manliness was, that he never +aimed at being a man. Many men continue childish because they are +always trying to act like men, instead of simply trying to do +right. Such never develop true manliness, Clare's manhood stole upon +him unawares. That which at once made him a man and kept him a child, +was, that he had no regard for anything but what was real, that is, +true. + +All the day the thought kept coming, what could he do for the little +girl Perhaps what stirred his feeling for her most, was a suspicion +that she was neglected. But the careless treatment of a nurse was +better for her than would have been the capricious blandishments and +neglects of a mother like Mrs. Shotover. Clare, however, knew nothing +yet about Ann's mother. He knew only, by the solemnly still ways of +the child, that she must be much left to her own resources, and was +wonderfully developed in consequence--whether healthily or not, he +could not yet tell. The practical question was--how to contrive to be +her occasional companion; how to offer to serve her. + +After much thinking, he concluded that he must wait: opportunity might +suggest mode; and he would rather find than make opportunity! + + + +Chapter LIX. + +Lovers' walks. + + +He had not long to wait. That very afternoon, going a message for the +head-clerk, he met Ann walking with a young lady--who must be Miss +Shotover. Neither sister seemed happy with the other. Ann was very +white, and so tired that she could but drag her little feet after +her. Miss Shotover, flushed with exertion, and annoyed with her part +of nursemaid, held her tight and hauled her along by the hand. She +looked good-natured, but not one of the ministering sort. Every now +and then she would give the little arm a pull, and say, though not +_very_ crossly, “Do come along!” The child did not cry, but it was +plain she suffered. It was plain also she was doing her best to get +home, and avoid rousing her sister's tug. + +Keen-sighted, Clare had recognized Ann at some distance, and as he +approached had a better opportunity than on the dark stair of seeing +what his little friend was like. He saw that her eyes were unusually +clear, and, paces away, could distinguish the blue veins on her +forehead: she looked even more delicate than he had thought her. The +lines of her mouth were straightened out with the painful effort she +had to make to keep up with her sister. Her nose continued +insignificant, waiting to learn what was expected of it. + +For Miss Shotover, there was not a good feature in her face, and even +to a casual glance it might have suggested a measure of meanness. But +a bright complexion, and the youthful charm which vanishes with youth, +are pleasant in their season. Her figure was lithe, and in general she +had a look of fun; but at the moment heat and impatience clouded her +countenance. + +Clare stopped and lifted his hat. Then first the dazed child saw him, +for she was short-sighted, and her observation was dulled by +weariness. She said not a word, uttered no sound, only drew her hand +from her sister's, and held up her arms to her friend--in dumb prayer +to be lifted above the thorns of life, and borne along without pain. +He caught her up. + +“I beg your pardon, ma'am,” he said, “but the little one and I have +met before:--I live in the house, having the honour to be the youngest +of your father's clerks. If you will allow me, I will carry the +child. She looks tired!” + +Miss Shotover was glad enough to be relieved of her clog, and gave +smiling consent. + +“If you would be so kind as to carry her home,” she said, “I should be +able to do a little shopping!” + +“You will not mind my taking her a little farther first, ma'am? I am +on a message for Mr. Woolrige. I will carry her all the way, and be +very careful of her.” + +Miss Shotover was not one to cherish anxiety. She already knew Clare +both by report and by sight, and willingly yielded. Saying, with one +of her pleasant smiles, that she would hold him accountable for her, +she sailed away, like a sloop that had been dragging her anchor, but +had now cut her cable. Clare thought what a sweet-looking girl she +was--and in truth she was sweet-_looking_. Then, all his heart turned +to the little one in his arms. + +What a walk was that for both of them! Little Ann seemed never to have +lived before: she was actually happy! She had been long waiting for +Clare, and he was come--and such as she had expected him! It was bliss +to glide thus along the busy street without the least exertion, +looking down on the heads of the people, safe above danger and fear +amid swift-moving things and the crowding confusions of life! To be in +Clare's arms was better than being in the little house on the +elephant's back in her best picture-book! True, little one! To be in +the arms of love, be they ever so weak, is better than to ride the +grandest horse in all the stables of God--and God would have you know +it! Never mind your pale little face and your puny nose! While your +heart is ready to die for love-sake, you are blessed among women! +Only remember that to die of disappointment is not to die either of or +for love! + +And to Clare, after all those days upon days during which only a dog +would come to his arms, what a glory of life it was to have a human +child in them, the little heart of the pale face beating against his +side! He was not going to forget Abdiel. Abdiel was not a fact to be +forgotten. Abdiel was not a doll, Abdiel was not a thing that would +not come alive. Abdiel was a true heart, a live soul, and Clare would +love him for ever!--not an atom the less that now he had one out upon +whom a larger love was able to flow! All true love makes abler to +love. It is only false love, the love of those who take their own +meanest selfishness, their own pleasure in being loved, for love, that +shrinks and narrows the soul. + +To the pale-faced, listening child, Clare talked much about the +wonderful Abdiel, and about the kind good Miss Tempest who was keeping +him to live again at length with his old master; and Ann loved the dog +she had never seen, because the dog loved the Clare who was come at +last. + +When they returned, Clare rang the house-bell, and gave up his charge +to the man who opened the door. Without word or tone, gesture or look +of objection, or even of disinclination, the child submitted to be +taken from Clare's loving embrace, and carried to a nurse who was +neither glad nor sorry to see her. + +He had been so long gone that Mr. Woolrige found fault with him for +it. Clare told him he had met Miss Shotover with her sister, and the +child seemed so tired he had asked leave to carry her with him, +Mr. Woolrige was not pleased, but he said nothing; on the spot the +clerks nicknamed him _Nursie_; and Clare did his best to justify the +appellation-he never lost a chance of acting up to it, and always +answered when they summoned him by it. + +Before the week was ended, he sought an interview with Miss Shotover, +and asked her whether he might not take little Ann out for a walk +whenever the evening was fine. For at five o'clock the doors of the +bank were shut, and in half an hour after he was free. Miss Shotover +said she saw no objection, and would tell the nurse to have her ready +as often as the weather was fit; whereupon Clare left her with a +gratitude far beyond any degree of that emotion by her conceivable. +The nurse, on her part, was willing to gratify Clare, and not sorry to +be rid of the child, who was not one, indeed, to interest any ordinary +woman. + +The summer came and was peculiarly fine, and almost every evening +Clare might be seen taking his pleasure--neither like bank-clerk nor +like nurse-maid, for always he had little Ann in his arms, or was +leading her along with care and entire attention: he never let her +walk except on entreaty, and not always then. To his fellow clerks +this proof of an utter lack of dignity seemed consistent with his +origin--of which they knew nothing; they knew only his late +position. To themselves they were fine gentlemen with cigars in their +mouths, and he was a lackey to the bone! To himself Clare was the +lover of a child; and about them he did not think. Theirs was the life +of a town; Clare's was a life of the universe. + +The pair came speedily to understand and communicate like twin brother +and sister. Clare, as he carried her, always knew when Ann wanted a +change of position; Ann always knew when Clare began to grow +weary--knew before Clare himself--and would insist on walking. +Neither could remember how it came, but it grew a custom that, when +they walked hand in hand, Clare told her stories of his life and +adventures; when he carried her, he told her fairy-tales, which he +could spin like a spider: she preferred the former. + +So neither bank nor nursery was any longer dreary. + +At length came the gray, brooding winter, causing red fingers and +aches and chilblains. But it was not unfriendly to little Ann. True, +she was not permitted to go out in the evening any more, but Clare, +with the help of the cook, devoted to her his dinner-hour instead. It +was no hardship to eat from a basket in place of a table, to one who +never troubled himself as to the kind, quality, or quantity of his +food itself. He had learned, like a good soldier, to endure +hardness. I have heard him say that never did he enjoy a dinner more +than when, in those homeless days of his boyhood, he tore the flakes +off a loaf fresh from the baker's oven, and ate them as he walked +along the street. The old highlanders of Scotland were trained to +think it the part of a gentleman not to mind what he ate--sign of +scant civilization, no doubt, in the eyes of some who now occupy but +do not fill their place--as time will show, when the call is for men +to fight, not to eat. + + + +Chapter LX. + +The shoe-black. + + +The head-clerk, while he had not a word against him, as he confessed +to Mr. Shotover, yet thought Clare would never make a man of +business. When pressed to say on what he grounded the opinion, he +could only answer that the lad did not seem to have his heart in it. +But if, to be a man of business, it is not enough to do one's duty +scrupulously, but the very heart must be in it, then is there +something wrong with business. The heart fares as its treasure: who +would be content his heart should fare as not a few sorts of treasure +must? Mr. Woolrige passed no such judgment, however, upon certain +older young men in the bank, whose hearts certainly were not in the +business, but even worse posited. + +One cold, miserable day, at once damp and frosty, on which it was +quite unfit to take Ann out, Clare, having eaten a hasty dinner, and +followed it with a walk, was returning through the town in good time +for the recommencement of business, when he came upon a little boy, at +the corner of a street, blowing his fingers, and stumping up and down +the pavement to keep his blood moving while he waited for a job: his +brushes lay on the top of his blacking-box on the curbstone. Clare saw +that he was both hungry and cold--states of sensation with which he +was far too familiar to look on the signs of them with indifference. +To give him something to do, and so something to eat, he went to his +block and put his foot on it. The boy bustled up, snatched at his +brushes, and began operations. But, whether from the coldness or +incapacity of his hands, Clare soon saw that his boots would not be +polished that afternoon. + +“You don't seem quite up to your business, my boy!” he said. “What's +the matter?” + +The boy made no answer, but went on with his vain attempt. A moment +more, and Clare saw a tear fall on the boot he was at work upon. + +“This won't do!” said Clare. “Let me look at _your_ boots.” + +The boy stood up, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. + +“Ah!” said Clare, “I don't wonder you can't polish my boots, when you +don't care to polish your own!” + +“Please, sir,” answered the boy, “it's Jim as does it! He's down wi' +the measles, an' I ain't up to it.” + +“Look here, then! I'll give you a lesson,” said Clare. “Many's the +boot I've blacked. Up with your foot! I'll soon show you how the +thing's done!” + +“Please, sir,” objected the boy, “there ain't enough boot left to take +a polish!” + +“We'll see about that!” returned Clare. “Put it up. I've worn worse in +my time.” + +The boy obeyed. The boot was very bad, but there was enough leather to +carry some blacking, and the skin took the rest. + +Clare was working away, growing pleasantly hot with the quick, sharp +motion, while two of his fellow clerks were strolling up on the other +side of the corner, who had been having more with their lunch than was +good for them. Swinging round, they came upon a well dressed youth +brushing a ragged boy's boots. It was an odd sight, and one of them, +whose name was Marway, thought to get some fun out of the phenomenon. + +“Here!” he cried, “I want my boots brushed.” + +Clare rose to his feet, saying, + +“Brush the gentleman's boots. I will finish yours after, and then you +shall finish mine.” + +“Hullo, Nursie! it's you turned boot-black, is it?--Nice thing for the +office, Jack!” remarked Marway, who was the finest gentleman, and the +lowest blackguard among the clerks. + +He put his foot on the block. The boy began his task, but did no +better with his boots than he had done with Clare's. + +“Soul of an ass!” cried Marway, “are you going to keep my foot there +till it freezes to the block? Why don't you do as Nursie tells you? +_He_ knows how to brush a boot! _You_ ain't worth your salt! You ain't +fit to black a donkey's hoofs!” + +“Give me the brushes, my boy,” said Clare. + +The boy rose abashed, and obeyed. After a few of Clare's light rapid +strokes, the boots looked very different. + +“Bravo, Nursie!” cried Marway. “There ain't a flunkey of you all could +do it better!” + +Clare said nothing, finished the job, and stood up. Marway, turning on +the other heel as he set his foot down, said, “Thank you, Nursie!” + and was walking off. + +“Please, Mr. Marway, give the boy his penny,” said Clare. + +But Marway wanted to _take a rise out of_ Clare. + +“The fool did nothing for me!” he answered. “He made my boot worse +than it was.” + +“It was I did nothing for you, Mr. Marway,” rejoined Clare. “What I +did, I did for the boy.” + +“Then let the boy pay you!” said Marway. + +The shoe-black went into a sudden rage, caught up one of his brushes, +and flung it at Marway as he turned. It struck him on the side of the +head. Marway swore, stalked up to Clare and knocked him down, then +strode away with a grin. + +The shoe-black sent his second brush whizzing past his ear, but he +took no notice. Clare got up, little the worse, only bruised. + +“See what comes of doing things in a passion!” he said, as the boy +came back with the brushes he had hastened to secure. “Here's your +penny! Put up your foot.” + +The boy did as he was told, but kept foaming out rage at the bloke +that had refused him his penny, and knocked down his friend. It did +not occur to him that he was himself the cause of the outrage, and +that his friend had suffered for him. Clare's head ached a good deal, +but he polished the boy's boots. Then he made him try again on his +boots, when, warmed by his rage, he did a little better. Clare gave +him another penny, and went to the bank. + +Marway was not there, nor did he show himself for a day or two. Clare +said nothing about what had taken place, neither did the others. + + + +Chapter LXI. + +A walk with consequences. + + +Clare had been in the bank more than a year, and not yet had +Mr. Shotover discovered why he did not quite trust him. Had Clare +known he did not, he would have wondered that he trusted him with such +a precious thing as his little Ann. But was his child very precious to +Mr. Shotover? When a man's heart is in his business, that is, when he +is set on making money, some precious things are not so precious to +him as they might be--among the rest, the living God and the man's own +life. He would pass Clare and the child without even a nod to indicate +approval, or a smile for the small woman. He had, I presume, +sufficient regard for the inoffensive little thing to be content she +should be happy, therefore did not interfere with what his clerks +counted so little to the honour of the bank. But although, as I have +said, he still doubted Clare, true eyes in whatever head must have +perceived that the child was in charge of an angel. The countenance of +Clare with Ann in his arms, was so peaceful, so radiant of simple +satisfaction, that surely there were some in that large town who, +seeing them, thought of the angels that do alway behold the face of +the Father in heaven. + +One evening in the early summer, when they had resumed their walks +after five o'clock, they saw, in a waste place, where houses had been +going to be built for the last two years, a number of caravans drawn +up in order. + +A rush of hope filled the heart of Clare: what if it should be the +menagerie he knew so well! And, sure enough, there was Mr. Halliwell +superintending operations! But if Glum Gunn were about, he might find +it awkward with the child in his arms! Gunn might not respect even +her! Besides he ought to ask leave to take her! He would carry her +home first, and come again to see his third mother and all his old +friends, with Pummy and the lion and the rest of the creatures. + +Little Ann was eager to know what those curious houses on wheels +were. Clare told her they were like her Noah's ark, full of beasts, +only real, live beasts, not beasts made of bits of stick. She became +at once eager to see them--the more eager that her contempt of things +like life that wouldn't come alive had been growing stronger ever +since she threw her doll out of the window. Clare told her he could +not take her without first asking leave. This puzzled her: Clare was +her highest authority. + +“But if _you_ take me?” she said. + +“Your papa and mamma might not like me to take you.” + +“But I'm yours!” + +“Yes, you're mine--but not so much,” he added with a sigh, “as +theirs!” + +“Ain't I?” she rejoined, in a tone of protesting astonishment mingled +with grief, and began to wriggle, wanting to get down. + +Clare set her down, and would have held her, as usual, by the hand, +but she would not let him. She stood with her eyes on the ground, and +her little gray face looking like stone. It frightened Clare, and he +remained a moment silent, reviewing the situation. + +“You see, little one,” he said at length, “you were theirs before I +came! You were sent to them. You are their own little girl, and we +must mind what they would like!” + +“It was only till you came!” she argued. “They don't care _very_ much +for me. Ask them, please, to sell me to you. I don't think they would +want much money for me! How many shillings do you think I am worth, +Clare? Not many, I hope!--Six?” + +“You are worth more than all the money in your papa's bank,” answered +Clare, looking down at her lovingly. + +The child's face fell. + +“Am I?” she said. “I'm so sorry! I didn't know I was worth so +much!--and not yours!” she added, with a sigh that seemed to come from +the very heart of her being. “Then you're not able to buy me?” + +“No, indeed, little one!” answered Clare. “Besides, papas don't sell +their little girls!” + +“Oh, yes, they do! Gus said so to Trudie!” Clare knew that _Trudie_ +meant her sister Gertrude. + +“Who is Gus?” he asked. + +“Trudie calls him Gus. I don't know more name to him. Perhaps they +call him something else in the bank.” + +“Oh! he's in the bank, is he?” returned Clare. “Then I think I know +him.” + +“He said it to her one night in my nursery. Jane went down; I was in +my crib. They talked such a long time! I tried to go to sleep, but I +couldn't. I heard all what he said to her. It wasn't half so nice as +what you talk to me!” + +This was not pleasant news to Clare. Augustus Marway was, if half the +tales of him were true, no fit person for his master's daughter to be +intimate with! He had once heard Mr. Shotover speak about gambling in +such terms of disapprobation as he had never heard him use about +anything else; and it was well known in the bank that Marway was in +the company of gamblers almost every night. He was so troubled, that +at first he wished the child had not told him. For what was he to do? +Could it be right to let the thing go on? Clare felt sure Mr. Shotover +either did not know that Marway gambled, or did not know that he +talked in the nursery with his daughter. But, alas, he could do +nothing without telling, and they all said none but the lowest of cads +would carry tales! For the young men thought it the part of gentlemen +_to stick by each other_, and hide from Mr. Shotover some things he +had a right to know. But Clare saw that, whatever they might think, he +must act in the matter. Little Ann wondered that he scarcely spoke to +her all the way home. But she did not say anything, for she too was +troubled: she did not belong to Clare so much as she had thought she +did! + +Clare reflected also as he went, how much he owed Ann's sister for +letting him have the little one. She had always spoken to him kindly +too, and never seemed, like the clerks, to look down upon him because +he had been a page-boy--though, he thought, if they were to be as +often hungry as he had been, they would be glad to be page-boys +themselves! For himself, he liked to be a page-boy! He would do +anything for Miss Tempest! And he must do what he could for Miss +Shotover! It would be wicked to let her marry a man that was wicked! +He had himself seen him drunk! Would it be fair, knowing she did not +know, not to tell? Would it not be helping to hurt her? Was he to be a +coward and fear being called bad names? Was he, for the sake of the +good opinion of rascals, to take care of the rascal, and let the lady +take care of herself? There was this difficulty, however, that he +could assert nothing beyond having seen him drunk! + +He carried Ann to the nursery, and set out for the menagerie. When he +knocked at the door of the house-caravan, Mrs. Halliwell opened it, +stared hardly an instant, threw her arms round his neck, and kissed +him. + +“Come in, come in, my boy!” she said. “It makes me a happy woman to +see you again. I've been just miserable over what might have befallen +you, and me with all that money of yours! I've got it by me safe, +ready for you! I lie awake nights and fancy Gunn has got hold of you, +and made away with you; then fall asleep and am sure of it. He's been +gone several times, a looking for you, I know! I think he's afraid of +you; I know he hates you. Mind you keep out of his sight; he'll do you +a mischief if he has the chance. He's the same as ever, a man to make +life miserable.” + +“I've never done him wrong,” said Clare, “and I'm not going to keep +out of his way as if I were afraid of him! I mean to come and see the +animals to-morrow.” + +A great deal more passed between them. They had their tea +together. Mr. Halliwell, who did not care for tea, came and went +several times, and now the night was dark. Then they spoke again of +Gunn. + +“Well, I don't think he'll venture to interfere with you,” said +Mrs. Halliwell, “except he happens to be drunk.--But what's that +talking? _We_'re all quiet for the night. Listen.” + +For some time Clare had been conscious of the whispered sounds of a +dialogue somewhere near, but had paid no attention. The voices were +now plainer than at first When his mother told him to listen, he did, +and thought he had heard one of them before. It was peculiar--that of +an old Jew whom he had seen several times at the bank. As the talking +went on, he began to think he knew the other voice also. It was that +of Augustus Marway. The two fancied themselves against a caravan full +of wild beasts. + +Marway was the son of the port-admiral, who, late in life, married a +silly woman. She died young, but not before she had ruined her son, +whose choice company was the least respectable of the officers who +came ashore from the king's ships. + +He had of late been playing deeper and having worse luck; and had +borrowed until no one would lend him a single sovereign more. His +father knew, in a vague way, how he was going on, and had nearly lost +hope of his reformation. Having yet large remains of a fine physical +constitution, he seldom failed to appear at the bank in the +morning--if not quite in time, yet within the margin of lateness that +escaped rebuke. Mr. Shotover was a connection by marriage, which gave +Marway the privilege of being regarded by Miss Shotover as a cousin--a +privilege with desirable possibilities contingent, making him anxious +to retain the good opinion of his employer. + +Clare heard but a portion here and there of the conversation going on +outside the wooden wall; but it was plain nevertheless that Marway was +pressing a creditor to leave him alone until he was married, when he +would pay every shilling he owed him. + +The young fellow had a persuasive tongue, and boasted he could get the +better of even a Jew. Clare heard the money-lender grant him a renewal +for three months, when, if Marway did not pay, or were not the +accepted suitor of the lady whose fortune was to redeem him, his +creditor would take his course. + +The moment he perceived they were about to part, Clare hastened from +the caravan, and went along the edge of the waste ground, so as to +meet Marway on his road back to the town: at the corner of it they +came jump together. Marway started when Clare addressed him. Seeing, +then, who claimed his attention, he drew himself up. + +“Well?” he said. + +“Mr. Marway,” began Clare, “I heard a great deal of what passed +between you and old Lewin.” + +Marway used worse than vulgar language at times, and he did so now, +ending with the words, + +“A spy! a sneaking spy! Would you like to lick my boot? By Jove, you +shall know the taste of it!” + +“Nobody minds being overheard who hasn't something to conceal! If I +had low secrets I would not stand up against the side of a caravan +when I wanted to talk about them. I was inside. Not to hear you I +should have had to stop my ears.” + +“Why didn't you, then, you low-bred flunkey?” + +“Because I had heard of you what made it my duty to listen.” + +Marway cursed his insolence, and asked what he was doing in such a +place. He would report him, he said. + +“What I was doing is my business,” answered Clare. “Had I known you +for an honest man I would not have listened to yours. I should have +had no right.” + +“You tell me to my face I'm a swindler!” said Marway between his +teeth, letting out a blow at Clare, which he cleverly dodged. + +“I do!” + +“I don't know what you mean, but bitterly shall you repent your +insolence, you prying rascal! This is your sweet revenge for a blow +you had not the courage to return!--to dog me and get hold of my +affairs! You cur! You're going to turn informer next, of course, and +bear false witness against your neighbour! You shall repent it, I +swear!” + +“Will it be bearing false witness to say that Miss Shotover does not +know the sort of man who wants to marry her? Does she know why he +wants to marry her? Does her father know that you are in the clutches +of a money-lender?” + +Marway caught hold of Clare and threatened to kill him. Clare did not +flinch, and he calmed down a little. + +“What do you want to square it?” he growled. + +“I don't understand you,” returned Clare. + +“What's the size of your tongue-plaster?” + +“I don't know much slang.” + +“What bribe will silence you then? I hope that is plain enough--even +for _your_ comprehension!” + +“If I had meant to hold my tongue, I should have held it.” + +“What do you want, then?” + +“To keep you from marrying Miss Shotover.” + +“By Jove! And suppose I kick you into the gutter, and tell you to mind +your own business--what then?” + +“I will tell either your father or Mr. Shotover all about it.” + +“Even you can't be such a fool! What good would it do you? You're not +after her yourself, are you?--Ha! ha!--that's it! I didn't nose +that!--But come, hang it! where's the _use_?--I'll give you four +flimsies--there! Twenty pounds, you idiot! There!” + +“Mr. Marway, nothing will make me hold my tongue--not even your +promise to drop the thing.” + +“Then what made you come and cheek me? Impudence?” + +“Not at all! I should have been glad enough not to have to do it! I +came to you for my own sake.” + +“That of course!” + +“I came because I would do nothing underhand!” + +“What are you going to do next, then?” + +“I am going to tell Mr. Shotover, or Admiral Marway--I haven't yet +made up my mind which.” + +“What are you going to tell them?” + +“That old Lewin has given you three months to get engaged to Miss +Shotover, or take the consequences of not being able to pay what you +owe him.” + +“And you don't count it underhand to carry such a tale?” + +“I do not. It would have been if I hadn't told you first. I would tell +Miss Shotover, only, if she be anything of a girl, she wouldn't +believe me.” + +“I should think not! Come, come, be reasonable! I always thought you a +good sort of fellow, though I _was_ rough on you, I confess. There! +take the money, and leave me my chance.” + +“No. I will save the lady if I can. She shall at least know the sort +of man you are.” + +“Then it's war to the knife, is it?” + +“I mean to tell the truth about you.” + +“Then do your worst. You shall black my boots again.” + +“If I do, I shall have the penny first.” + +“You cringing flunkey!” + +“I haven't cringed to you, Mr. Marway!” + +Marway tried to kick him, failed, and strode into the dark between him +and the lamps of the town. + + + +Chapter LXII. + +The cage of the puma. + + +Marway was a fine, handsome fellow, whose manners, where he saw +reason, soon won him favour, and two of the young men in the office +were his ready slaves. Every moment of the next day Clare was +watched. Marway had laid his plans, and would forestall +frustration. Clare could hardly do anything before the dinner-hour, +but Marway would make assurance double sure. + +At anchor in the roads lay a certain frigate, whose duty it was to +sail round the islands, like a duck about her floating brood. Among +the young officers on board were two with whom Marway was intimate. He +had met them the night before, and they had together laid a plot for +nullifying Clare's interference with Marway's scheme--which his +friends also had reason to wish successful, for Marway owed them both +money. Clare had come in the way of all three. + +Now little Ann was a guardian cherub to the object of their enmity, +and he and she must first of all be separated. Clare had asked leave +of Miss Shotover to take the child to Noah's ark, as she called it, +that evening, and Marway had learned it from her: Clare's going would +favour their plan, but the child's presence would render it +impracticable. + +One thing in their favour was, that Mr. Shotover was from home. If +Clare had resolved on telling him rather than the admiral, he could +not until the next evening, and that would give them abundant time. On +the other hand, having him watched, they could easily prevent him from +finding the admiral. But Clare had indeed come to the just conclusion +that his master had the first right to know what he had to tell. His +object was not the exposure of Marway, but the protection of his +master's daughter: he would, therefore, wait Mr. Shotover's return. +He said to himself also, that Marway would thereby have a chance to +bethink himself, and, like Hamlet's uncle, “try what repentance can.” + +As soon as he had put the bank in order for the night, he went to find +his little companion, and take her to Noah's ark. The child had been +sitting all the morning and afternoon in a profound stillness of +expectation; but the hour came and passed, and Clare did not appear. + +“You never, never, never came,” she said to him afterward. “I had to +go to bed, and the beasts went away.” + +It was many long weeks before she told him this, or her solemn little +visage smiled again. + +He went to the little room off the hall, where he almost always found +her waiting for him, dressed to go. She was not there. Nobody came. He +grew impatient, and ran in his eagerness up the front stair. At the +top he met the butler coming from the drawing-room--a respectable old +man, who had been in the family as long as his master. + +“Pardon me, Mr. Porson,” said the butler, who was especially polite to +Clare, recognizing in him the ennoblement of his own order, “but it is +against the rules for any of the gentlemen below to come up this +staircase.” + +“I know I'm in the wrong,” answered Clare; “but I was in such a hurry +I ventured this once. I've been waiting for Miss Ann twenty minutes.” + +“If you will go down, I will make inquiry, and let you know directly,” + replied the butler. + +Clare went down, and had not waited more than another minute when the +butler brought the message that the child was not to go out. In vain +Clare sought an explanation; the old man knew nothing of the matter, +but confessed that Miss Shotover seemed a little put out. + +Then Clare saw that his desire to do justice had thwarted his +endeavour: Marway had seen Miss Shotover, he concluded, and had so +thoroughly prejudiced her against anything he might say, that she had +already taken the child from him! He repented that he had told him his +purpose before he was ready to follow it up with immediate +action. Distressed at the thought of little Ann's disappointment, he +set out for the show, glad in the midst of his grief, that he was +going to see Pummy once more. + +The weather had been a little cloudy all day, but as he left the +closer part of the town, the vaporous vault gave way, and the west +revealed a glorious sunset. Troubled for the trouble of little Ann, +Clare seemed drawn into the sunset. The splendour said to him: “Go on; +sorrow is but a cloud. Do the work given you to do, and the clouds +will keep moving; stop your work and the clouds will settle down +hard.” + +“When I was on the tramp,” thought Clare, “I always went on, and +that's how I came here. If I hadn't gone on, I should never have found +the darling!” + +As little as during any day's tramp did he know how his reflection was +going to be justified. + +He wandered on, and the minutes passed slowly: it was wandering now +with no child in his arms! He was in no haste to go to the menagerie; +he would be in good time for the beasts; and the later he was, the +sooner he would see his mother alone and have a talk with her! + +At last, it being now quite dark, he turned, and made for the +caravans. + +A crowd was going up the steps, passing Mrs. Halliwell slowly, and +descending into the area surrounded by the beasts. Clare went up, and +laid his money on the little white table. The good woman took it with +a smile, threw it in her wooden bowl, and handed him, as if it had +been his change, three bright sovereigns. Clare turned his face +away. He could not take them. He felt as if it would break one bond +between them. + +“The money's your own!” she said, in a low voice. + +“By and by, mother!” he answered. + +“No, no, take it now,” she insisted, in an almost angry whisper; but +the same moment threw the sovereigns among the silver, and some +coppers that lay on the table over them. + +Judging by her look that he had better say nothing, he turned and went +down the steps. Before he reached the bottom of them, Glum Gunn +elbowed his way past him, throwing a scowl on him from his ugly eyes +at the range of a few inches. + +The place was fuller than it had been all the evening, and with a +rougher sort of company. The show would close in about an hour. It +seemed to Clare not so well lighted as usual. Perhaps that was why he +did not observe that he was watched and followed by Marway, with two +others, and one burly, middle-aged, sailor-looking fellow. But I doubt +whether he would have seen them in any light, for he had no +suspicions, and was not ready to analyze a crowd and distinguish +individuals. + +He avoided making straight for Pummy, contenting himself for the +moment with an occasional glimpse of him between the moving heads, now +opening a vista, now closing it again, for he hoped to get gradually +nearer unseen, so as to be close to the animal when first he should +descry him, for he dreaded attracting attention by becoming, while yet +at a distance, the object of an uproarious outbreak of affection on +the part of the puma. + +But while he was yet a good way from him, a most ferocious yell sprang +full grown into the air, which the very fibres of his body knew as one +of the cries of the puma when most enraged. There he was on his hind +legs, ramping against the front of the cage, every hair on him +bristling, his tail lashing his flanks. The same instant arose a +commotion in the crowd behind Clare, a pushing and stooping and +swaying to and fro, with shouts of, “Here he is! here he is!” + +Filled with a foreboding that was almost a prescience, he fell to +forcing his way without ceremony, and had got a little nearer to the +puma, when, elbowing roughly through the spectators, with red, evil +face, in drink but not drunk, Glum Gunn appeared, almost between him +and the cage--once more, to the horror of Clare, holding by the neck +his poor little Abdiel, curled up into the shape of a flea. The brute +was making his way with him to the cage of the puma, whose wrath, +grown to an indescribable frenzy, now blazed point-blank at the dog. + +I think some waft of the wild odour of the menagerie must have reached +the nostrils of the loving creature, brought back old times and his +master, and waked the hope of finding him. That he had but just +arrived was plain, for he had not had time to get to his master. + +Clare was almost at the edge of the close-packed, staring crowd, +absorbed in the sight of the huge raving cat. Breaking through its +outermost ring in the strength of sudden terror, he darted to the cage +to reach it before Glum Gunn. A man crossed and hustled him. Gunn +opened the door of the cage, and flung Abdiel to the puma. Ere he +could close it, Clare struck him once more a stout left-hander on the +side of his head. Gunn staggered back. Clare sprang into the +cage--just as Pummy spying him uttered a jubilant roar of +recognition. His jumping into the cage just prevented the puma from +getting out, and the crowd from trampling each other to death to +escape The Christians' Friend; but now that Clare was in, the +cage-door might have swung all night open unheeded--so long, that is, +as no dog appeared. + +As for Abdiel the puma had forgotten him: the dog was out of his sight +for the moment, though only behind him, while his friend and he were +rubbing recognizant noses. Abdiel showed his wisdom by keeping in the +background. The moment he was flung into the cage, he had got into a +corner of it, and stood up on his hind legs. + +His master believed that, knowing how the puma loved the human form +divine, he thought to prejudice him in his favour by showing how near +he could come to it. There he yet stood, his head sunk on his chest, +watching out of his eyes for the terrible moment when his enemy should +again catch sight of him. + +The moment came. The puma's delight had broken out in wildest +motion. He sprang to the roof of his cage, and grappling there, looked +down with retorted neck, and saw the dog. Poor Abdiel immediately +raised his head, and in hope of propitiation all but forlorn, began a +little dance his master had taught him. + +What Pummy would have done with him, I fear, but I cannot tell. Clare +sprang to the rescue, and the weight of the puma's bulk descended, not +on Abdiel, but on the shoulders of Clare who had the dog in his +bosom. In a moment more it was evidenced that a common love, however +often the cause of jealousy, is the most powerful mediator between the +generous. The puma forgot his hate, the dog forgot his fear, and +presently, to the admiration of the crowd, Clare and Pummy and Abby +were rolling over and over each other on the floor of the cage. + +Pummy had the best of the rough game. One moment he would be a bend in +a seemingly unloosable knot of confused animality, the next he would +be clinging to the top of his cage, where the others could not follow +him. Perhaps to have a human to play with, was even better than dreams +of loveliest frolics with brothers and sisters, and a mother as madly +merry as they, in still, moonlit nights among the rocks, where neither +sound nor scent of horse woke the devil in any of their bosoms! + +Glum Gunn, too angry to speak, stood watching with a scowl fit for +Lucifer when he rose from his first fall from heaven. He could do +nothing! If he touched one, all three would be upon him! Experience +had taught him what the puma would do in defence of Clare! He must +bide his time!--But he must keep hold of his chance! He drew from his +pocket his master-key, and at a moment when Clare was under the other +two, slid it into the key-hole, and locked the door of the cage. He +had him now--and his beast of a dog too! If he could have turned the +puma mad, and made him tear them both to shreds, he would not have +delayed an instant. But he must think! He must say, like Hamlet, +“About, my brains!” + +The man, however, who wishes to do evil, will find as ready helpers as +he who wishes to do well: in the place were those who wanted Gunn's +aid, and would give him theirs. + +He felt a touch on his arm, glanced sullenly round, and saw a face +under whose beauty lay the devil. Marway, with eye and thumb, +requested him to withdraw for a moment, and he did not hesitate. As he +went he chuckled to himself at the thought of Clare when he found the +door locked. + +Marway's three accomplices had drifted off one by one to wait him +outside: he rejoined them with Gunn; and, retiring a little way from +the caravans, the five held a council, the results of which make an +important part of Clare's history. + +Clare seemed absorbed in his game with his four-footed, one-tailed +friends, but he was wide awake: he had Abdiel to deliver, and kept, +therefore, all the time, at least half an eye on Glum Gunn. He saw +Marway come up to him, and saw them retire together: it was the very +moment to leave the cage with Abdiel! He rose, not without difficulty, +because of the jumping of his playmates upon him and over him, and +went to the door. + +The moment he did so, the crowd was greatly amused to see the puma +turn upon the dog with a snarl, and the dog, at the fearful sound of +altered mood, immediately put on the man, rise to one pair of feet, +and begin to dance. The puma turned from him, went to the heel of his +chosen master, and there stood. + +In vain Clare endeavoured to open the gate. He had never known it +locked, and could not think when it had been done. At length, amid the +laughter of the spectators, he desisted, and the three resumed their +frolics. + +At this the admiration of the visitors broke out. They had seen the +door made fast, and had kept pretty quiet, waiting what would come: +they had thus earned their amusement when he sought in vain to open +it. When his withdrawal confessed him foiled, the merrier began to +mock and the ruder to jeer. But when they saw him laugh, and all three +return to their gambols, they applauded heartily. + +Just before this last portion of the entertainment, Mr. Halliwell, who +had been looking on for a while, retired, not knowing the cage-door +was locked. He went to his wife and said, that, if they had but the +boy and his dog again, and were but free of that brother of his, the +menagerie would be a wild-beast paradise. He would have had her go and +see the pranks in the puma's cage, but she was too tired, she said; so +he strolled out with his pipe, and left his men to close the +exhibition. Mrs. Halliwell fastened her door and went to bed, a little +hurt that Clare did not come to her. + +Gradually the folk thinned away; and at last only a few who had got in +at half-price remained. To them the attendants hinted that they were +going to shut shop, and one by one they shuffled out, the readier that +Clare was now so tired that Pummy could not get up the merest tail of +a lark more. He was quite fresh himself, and had he been out in the +woods, would certainly not have gone home till morning. But he was +such a human creature that he would not insist when he saw Clare was +weary; and that he had no inclination to play with Abdiel when his +master was out of the game, was quite as well for Abdiel, for Pummy +might have forgot himself. When Abby, not free from fear, as knowing +well he was not free from danger, crept to his master's bosom, Pummy +gave a low growl, and shoving his nose under the long body of the dog, +with one jerk threw him a yard off upon the floor, whence Abdiel +returned to content himself with his master's feet, abandoning the +place of honour to one who knew himself stronger, and probably counted +himself better. So they all fell asleep in peace. For although Clare +knew himself and Abdiel Gunn's prisoners, he feared no surprise with +two such rousable companions. + + + +Chapter LXIII. + +The dome of the angels. + + +When Clare awoke, he knew he had been asleep a long time. It was, +notwithstanding, quite dark, and there was something wrong with +him. His head ached: it had never ached before. He put out his hands: +Pummy's hairy body was nowhere near. He called Abdiel: no whimper +answered; no cold nose was thrust into his hand. He had gone to sleep, +surely between his two friends! Could he have only dreamed it? + +Why was the darkness so thick? There must surely be light in the +clouds by this time! He felt half awake and half dreaming. + +What was the curious motion he grew aware of? Was something trying to +keep him asleep, or was something trying to wake him? Had they put him +in a big cradle? Were they heaving him about to rouse him? Or could it +be a gentle earthquake that was rocking him to and fro? Would it wake +up in earnest presently, and pull and push, and shake and rattle, +until the dome of the angels came shivering down upon him? + +Where was he? Not on the hard floor of Pummy's cage, but on something +much harder--like iron. Was he in the wagon in which they carried the +things for setting up the show? Something had happened to him, and his +mother was taking him with her! But in that case he would be lying +softer! _She_ would not have given him a bed so full of aches! + +What would they think at the bank? What would little Ann think if he +came to her no more? + +He could not be in a caravan; the motion was much too smooth and +pleasant for that! + +He put his hand to his face: what was it wet on his cheek? It did not +feel nice; it felt like blood! Had he had a blow on the head? Was that +what gave him this headache? He felt his head all over, but could find +no hurt. + +Why was he lying like a log, wondering and wondering, instead of +getting up and seeing what it all meant? It must be the darkness and +the headache that kept him down! The place was very close! He +_must_ get out of it! + +He tried to get on his feet, but as he rose, his head struck +something, and he dropped back. He got again on his knees and groped +about. On all sides he was closed in. But he was not shut in a dungeon +of stone. He seemed to be in a great wooden box--small enough to be a +box, much too large for a coffin. Could it be one of the oubliettes in +the roof of the doge's palace at Venice? He laughed at the idea, for +the motion continued, the gentle earthquake that seemed trying to rock +him to sleep: the doge's palace could hardly be afloat on the grand +canal! + +What could it all mean? What would little Ann do without him? She +would not cry: she never cried--at least, he had never seen her cry! +but that would not make it easier for her! + +What had become of Abdiel? Had Glum Gunn got him? Then the wet on his +face was Abdiel's blood--shed in his defence, perhaps, when his +enemies were taking him away! + +Fears and anxieties, such as he had never known before, began to crowd +upon him--not for himself; he was not made to think of himself, either +first or second. Something dreadful might be going on that he could +not prevent! He had never been so miserable. It was high time to do +something--to ask the great one somewhere, he did not know where, who +could somehow, he did not know how, hear the thoughts that were not +words, to do what ought to be done for little Ann, and Abdiel, and +Pummy! He prayed in his heart, lay still, and fell fast asleep. + +He came to himself again, in the act of drawing a deep breath of cool, +delicious air. He was no longer shut in the dark, stifling box. He was +coming alive! A comforting wind blew all about him. It was like a live +thing putting its own life into him. But his eyelids were heavy; he +was unable to open them. + +All at once they opened of themselves. + +The dome of the angels had come down and closed in round him, but +bringing room for him, taking none away. It was blue, and filled with +the loveliest white clouds, possessed by a blowing wind that never was +able to blow them away. They were of strangely regular shapes; not the +less were they alive--piled one above the other, up and up--up ever so +high! They all kept their places, and some had the loveliest blue +shadows upon them, which glided about a little. But the dome of the +angels rose high, and ever higher still, above them. The dome of the +angels was at home, and the clouds were at home in it. He gazed +entranced at the sight. Then came a sudden strong heave and roll of +the earthquake, and a light shone in his eyes that blinded him. + +It was but the strong friendly sun. When Clare opened his eyes again, +he knew that he was lying on the deck of one of the great ships he had +so frequently looked at from the shore. Oh, how often had he not +longed after this one and that one of them, as if in some one +somewhere, perhaps in that one, lay something he could not do without, +which yet he could never set his eyes, not to say his hands upon. He +had his heart's desire, and what was to come of it? He lay on the +ship, and the ship lay on the sea, a little world afloat on the water, +moving as a planet moves through the heavens, but carrying her own +heaven with her, attended by her own clouds, bearing her whither she +would. Up into those clouds he lay gazing, up into the dome of the +angels, drawing deeper and deeper breaths of gladness, too happy to +think--when a foot came with a kick in the ribs, and a voice ordered +him to get up: was he going to lie there till the frigate was paid +off? + + + +Chapter LXIV. + +The panther. + + +Clare scrambled to his feet, and surveyed the man who had thus roused +him. He had a vague sense of having seen him before, but could not +remember where. Feeling faint, and finding himself beside a gun, he +leaned upon it. + +The sailor regarded him with an insolent look. + +“Wake up,” he said, “an' come along to the cap'n. What's the service a +comin' to, I should like to know, when a beggarly shaver like you has +the cheek to stow hisself away on board one o' his majesty's frigates! +Wouldn' nothin' less suit your highness than a berth on the Panther?” + +“Is that the name of the ship?” asked Clare. + +“Yes, that's the name of the ship!” returned the man, mimicking +him. “You'll have the Panther, his mark, on the back o' _you_ +presently! Come along, I say, to the cap'n! We ha' got to ask _him_, +what's to be done wi' rascals as rob their masters, an' then stow +theirselves away on board his majesty's ships!” + +“Take me to the captain,” said Clare. + +The man seemed for a moment to doubt whether there might not be some +mistake: he had expected to see him cringe. But he took him by the +collar behind, and pushed him along to the quarter-deck, where an +elderly officer was pacing up and down alone. + +“Well, Tom,” said the captain, stopping in his walk, “what's the +matter? Who's that you've got?” + +“Please yer honour,” answered the boatswain, giving Clare a shove, +“this here's a stowaway in his majesty's ship, Panther. I found him +snug in the cable-tier.--Salute the captain, you beggar!” + +Clare had no cap to lift, but he bowed like the gentleman he was. The +captain stood looking at him. Clare returned his gaze, and smiled. A +sort of tremble, much like that in the level air on a hot summer day, +went over the captain's face, and he looked harder at Clare. + +A sound arose like the purring of an enormous cat, and, sure enough, +it was nothing else: chained to the foot of the forward binnacle stood +a panther, a dark yellow creature with black spots, bigger than Pummy, +swinging his tail. Clare turned at the noise he made. The panther made +a bound and a leap to the height and length of his chain, and uttered +a cry like a musical yawn. Clare stretched out his arms, and staggered +toward him. The next moment the animal had him. The captain darted to +the rescue. But the beast was only licking him wherever there was a +bare spot to lick; and Clare wondered to find how many such spots +there were: he was in rags! The panther kept tossing him over and over +as if he were a baby, licking as he tossed, and in his vibrating body +and his whole behaviour manifested an exceeding joy. The captain stood +staring “like one that hath been stunned.” + +The boatswain was not astonished: he had seen Clare at home among wild +animals, and thought the panther was taken with the wild-beast smell +about him. + +“I beg your pardon, sir,” said Clare, rolling himself out of the +panther's reach, and rising to his feet, “but wild things like me, +somehow! I slept with a puma last night. He and this panther, sir, +would have a terrible fight if they met!” + +The captain threw a look of disappointment at the panther. + +“Go forward, Tom,” he said. + +The man did not like the turn things had taken, and as he went wore +something of the look of one doomed to make the acquaintance of +another kind of cat. + +“What made you come on board this ship, my lad?” asked the captain, in +a voice so quiet that it sounded almost kind. + +“I did not come on board, sir.” + +“Don't trifle with _me_,” returned the captain sternly. + +Clare looked straight at him, and said-- + +“I have done nothing wrong, sir. I know you will help me. I fell +asleep last night, as I told you, sir, in the cage of a puma. I knew +him, of course! How I came awake on board your ship, I know no more +than you do, sir.” + +The smile of Clare's childhood had scarcely altered, and it now shone +full on the captain. He turned away, and made a tack or two on the +quarter-deck. He was a tall, thin man, with a graceful carriage, and a +little stoop in the shoulders. He had a handsome, sad face, growing +old. His hair was more than half way to gray, and he seemed somewhere +about fifty. He had the sternness of a man used to command, but under +the sternness Clare saw the sadness. + +The attention of the boy was now somewhat divided between the captain +and his panther, which seemed possessed with a fierce desire to get at +him, though plainly with no inimical intent. The attention of the +captain seemed divided between the boy and the panther; his eyes now +rested for a moment on the animal, now turned again to the boy. Two +officers on the port side of the quarter-deck stole glances at the +strange group--the stately, solemn, still man; the ragged creature +before him, who looked in his face without fear or anxiety, and with +just as little presumption; and the wildly excited panther, whose +fierce bounding alternated with cringing abasement of his beautiful +person, accompanied by loving sweeps of his most expressive tail. + +The captain made a tack or two more on the quarter-deck, then turned +sharp on the boy. + +“What is your name?” he asked. + +“I don't quite know, sir,” answered Clare. + +“Come with me,” said the captain. + +To the surprise of the officers, he led the way to his state-room, and +the boy followed. The panther gave a howl as Clare disappeared. The +officers remarked that the captain looked strange. His lips were +compressed as if with vengeance, but the muscles of his face were +twitching. + + + +Chapter LXV. + +At home. + + +Clare followed, wondering, but nowise anxious. He saw nothing to make +him anxious. The captain looked a good man, and a good man was a +friend to Clare! But when he entered the state-room, and saw himself +from head to foot in a mirror let into a bulkhead, he was both +startled and ashamed: how could the captain take such a scarecrow into +his room! he thought. He did not reflect that it was just the sort of +thing he did himself. He had indeed felt dirty and disreputable, and +been aware of the dry, rasping tongue of the panther on many patches +of bare skin, but he had had no idea what a wretched creature he +looked. Not one of the garments he saw in the mirror was his own, and +they were disgracefully torn. His hair was sticking out every way, and +his face smeared with blood. His feet were bare, and one trouser-leg +rent to the knee. His enemies had done their best to ensure prejudice, +and frustrate belief. They did not see in his look what no honest man +could misread. Innocent as he knew himself, he could not help feeling +for a moment disconcerted. But his faithfulness threw him on the mercy +of the man before him. + +The captain turned and sat down. The boy stood in the doorway, staring +at his reflex self in the mirror. The captain understood his +consternation. + +“Come along, my poor boy,” he said. “How did you get into this mess?” + +“I think I know,” answered Clare, “but I'm not sure.” + +“You must have been drunk,” sighed the captain. + +“Oh, no, sir!” returned Clare, with one of his radiant smiles. “I've +had but one glass of beer in my life, and I didn't like it.” + +The captain smiled too, and gazed at him for several moments without +speaking. + +“It seems to me,” he said at last, but as if he were thinking of +something quite different, “you must be in want of food.” + +“Oh, no, sir!” answered Clare again, “I'm used to going without.” + +Like a child the sport of an evil fairy, he was again the boy of the +old wanderings, in the old, hungry times. But did he ever look so lost +as in the mirror before him? he wondered. + +“You haven't told me----” said the captain, and stopped short, as if +he dreaded going further. + +“I will tell you anything you want to know, sir. Please ask me.” + +“You say you did not come on board the frigate: what am I to +understand by that?” + +“That I was brought, sir, in my sleep. It wouldn't be fair, would it, +sir, to mention names, when I don't know for certain who they were +that brought me? I never knew anything till I opened my eyes, and +thought I was in----” + +He paused. + +“_Where_ did you think you were?” asked the captain eagerly. + +“In the dome of the angels, sir,” answered Clare. + +The captain's face fell. He thought him an innocent, on whom rascals +had been playing a practical joke. But that made no difference! If he +were a simpleton, he might none the less be----! Was _her_ boy left +to----? + +He shuddered visibly, and again was silent. + +“Tell me,” he said at length, “what you remember.” + +He meant--of the circumstances that immediately preceded his coming to +himself on board the Panther; but Clare began with the first thing his +memory presented him with. Perhaps he was yet a little dazed. He had +not got through a single sentence, when he saw that something earlier +wanted telling first; and the same thing happening again and again +within the first five minutes of his narration, sir Harry saw he had +before him a boy either of fertile imagination, or of “strange, +eventful history.” But either supposition had its difficulty. If, on +the one hand, he had had the tenth part of the experiences hinted at; +if, for one thing, he had been but a single month on the tramp, how +had he kept such an innocent face, such an angelic smile? If, on the +other hand, he was making up these tales, why did he not look sharper? +and whence the angelic smile? Did the seeming innocence indicate only +such a lack of intellect as occasionally accompanies a remarkable +individual gift? He must make him begin at the beginning, and tell +everything he knew, or might pretend to know about himself! + +“Stop,” he said. “You told me you did not quite know your name: what +did they call you as far back as you can remember?” + +“Clare Porson,” answered the boy. + +At the first word the captain gave a little cry, but repressed his +emotion, and went on. His face was very white, and his breath came and +went quickly. + +“Why did you say you did not _quite_ know your name?” + +“My father and mother called me by their name because there was nobody +to tell them what my real name was.” + +“Then they weren't your own father and mother that gave you the name?” + +“No, sir. I'm but using theirs till I get my own. I shall one day.” + +“Why do you think so?” + +“Don't _you_ think, sir, that everything will come right one day?” + +“God grant it!” responded the captain with a groan, self-reproached +for the little faith beside the strong desire. + +“Do you think it wrong, sir, to use a name that is not quite my own?” + said Clare. “People sometimes seem to think so.” + +“Not at all, my boy! You must have a name. You did not steal it. They +gave it you.” + +The look of the boy when he thus answered him, completely restored sir +Harry's confidence in his mental soundness, while both the mode and +the nature of his answer to every question he put to him, bore the +strongest impress of truth. + +“If the boy be a liar,” he said to himself, “I will never more trust +my kind. I will turn to the wild-beasts, and believe in panthers and +hyenas!” + +“They did, sir,” answered Clare. “Mr. Porson gave me his own name, and +he was a clergyman. So I thought afterwards, when I had to think about +it, that it couldn't be wrong to use it.” + +But how could sir Harry palter so with himself? He might have got at +the necessary facts so much quicker! + +Sir Harry shrank from seeing his suddenly wakened hope, dead for many +a year, crumble before his eyes. He dared not yet drive question +close. + +“Did Mr. Porson give you both your names?” he asked. + +“No, sir. My mother said I brought the first with me. She said I told +them--I don't remember myself--that my name was Clare.” + +The captain drove back the words that threatened to break from his +lips in spite of him. His boy's name was Clarence, but his mother, +whose dearest friend was a _Clara_, called her child always _Clare_! + +“I mean my second mother, sir,” explained Clare; “my own mother is in +the dome of the angels.” + +A flash lightened from the captain's eyes, but he seemed to himself to +have gone blind. Clare saw the flash, and wondered. + +Again _the dome of the angels_! The words burst into meaning. Out of +the depths of the world of life rose to his mind's eye the terrible +thing that had made him a lonely man. Again he stood with his head +thrown back, looking up at the Assumption of the Virgin painted in +that awful dome; again the earthquake seized the church, and shook the +painted heaven down upon them. He knew no more. His little boy had +been standing near him, holding his mother's hand, but staring up like +his father! + +He had to force the next words from his throat. + +“Where did the good people who gave you their name find you?” + +“Sitting on my mother--my own mother. The angels fell down on her, and +when they went up again, she had got mixed with them, and went up +too.” + +Some people thought my friend Skymer “a little queer, you know!” I +leave my reader to his own thought: he will judge after his +kind. Clare's father no longer doubted his perfect faculty. + +All through Clare's life, as often as the old, vague, but ever ready +vision brought back its old feelings, with them came the old thoughts, +the old forms of them, and the old words their attendant shadows; and +then Clare talked like a child. + +The stern, sorrowful man hid his face In his hands. + +“Grace,” he murmured--and Clare knew somehow that he spoke to his +wife, “we have him again! We will never distrust him more!” + +His frame heaved with the choking of his sobs. + +Then Clare understood that the grand man was his father. The awe of a +perfect gladness fell upon him. He knelt before him, and laid his +hands together as in prayer. + +“Why did you distrust me, father?” said the half-naked outcast. + +“It was not my child, it was my father I distrusted. I am ashamed,” + said sir Harry, and clasped him in his arms. + +The boy laid his blood-stained face against his father's bosom, and +his soul was in a better home than a sky full of angels, a home better +than the dome itself of all the angels, for his home was his father's +heart. + +How long they remained thus I cannot tell. It seemed to both as if so +it had been from eternity, and so to eternity it would be. When a +thing is as it should be, then we know it is from eternity to +eternity. The true is. + +The father relaxed at length the arms that strained his child to his +heart. Clare looked up with white, luminous face. He gazed at his +father, cried like little Ann, “You're come!” and slid to his feet. He +clasped and kissed and clung to them--would hardly let them go. + +All this time the officers on the quarter-deck were wondering what the +captain could have to do with the beggarly stowaway. The panther stood +on his feet, anxiously waiting, his ears starting at every sound. He +was longing for the boy with whom he had played, panther cub with +human infant, in the years long gone by. The sweet airs of his +childhood were to the panther plainly recognizable through all the +accretions that disfigured but could not defile him. The two were the +same age. They had rolled on floor and deck together when neither +could hurt--and now neither would. For the animal was perfectly +harmless, and chained only because apt to be unseasonably +frolicsome. When they let him loose, it was a season of high jinks and +rare skylarking. Then the men had to look out! He had twice knocked a +man overboard, and had once tumbled overboard himself. But he had +never killed a creature, was always gentle with children, and might be +trusted to look after any infant. + +Sir Harry raised his son, kissed him, set him on his own chair, and +retired into an inner cabin. + +A knock came to the door. Clare said, “Come in.” The quartermaster +entered. Instead of sir Harry, he saw the miserable stowaway, seated +in the captain's own chair. He swore at him, and ordered him out, +prepared to give him a kick as he passed. + +“Out with you!” he cried. “Go for'ard. Tell the bo's'n to look out a +rope's end. I'll be after you.” + +“The captain told me to sit here,” answered Clare, and sat. + +The officer looked closer at him, begged his pardon, saluted, and +withdrew. + +The father heard, and said to himself, “The boy is a gentleman: he +knows where to take his orders.” + +He called him into the inner cabin, and there washed him from head to +foot, rejoicing to find under his rags a skin as clean as his own. + +“Now what are we to do for clothes, Clare?” said sir Harry. + +“Perhaps somebody would lend me some,” answered Clare. “Mayn't I be +your cabin-boy, father? You will let me be a sailor, won't you, and +sail always with you?” + +“You shall be a sailor, my boy,” answered sir Harry, “and sail with me +as long as God pleases. You know to obey orders!” + +“I will obey the cook if you tell me, father.” + +“You shall obey nobody but myself,” returned sir Harry; “--and the +lord high admiral,” he added, with a glance upward, and a smile like +his son's. + +For that day Clare kept to the captain's state-room; the next, he went +on deck in a midshipman's uniform, which he wore like a gentleman that +could obey orders. + + + +Chapter LXVI. + +The end of Clare Skymer's boyhood. + + +His father had a hammock slung for him in the state-room; he could not +be parted from him even when they slept. + +One night sir Harry, lying awake, heard a movement in the state-room, +and got up. It was a still, star-lit night. The frigate was dreaming +away northward with all sail set. Through the windows shone the level +stars. From a beam above hung a dim lamp. He could see no one. He went +to the hammock. There was no boy in it. Then he spied him, kneeling +under the stern-windows, with his head down. + +“Anything the matter, Clare?” he asked. + +“No, father.” + +“What are you doing?” + +“Trying to say _Thank you for my father!_” + +“Oh, thank him, thank him, my boy!” returned sir Harry. “Thank him +with all your heart. He will give us _her_ some day!” + +“Yes, father, he will!” responded Clare. + +His father knelt beside him, but neither said word that the other +heard. + +The next night, Clare was on the quarter-deck with his father, and +heard him give certain orders to the officers of the watch. He had +never heard orders given in such a way: he spoke so quietly, so +directly, so simply! The night was gusty and dark, threatening foul +weather. The captain measured the quarter-deck as when first Clare saw +him, but with a mien how different! He walked as slow and stately as +before, but with a look almost of triumph in his eyes, glancing often +at the clouds. The thought of having such a father made Clare tremble +with delight from head to foot. His father was the power of the +sea-planet that bore them! Him the great vessel, and all aboard of +her, obeyed! He was the life of her motions, the soul of her! At his +pleasure she bowed her obedient head, and swept over the seas! Clare's +heart swelled within him. + +But this father had, the night before, knelt with him in the presence +of one unseen, worshipping and thanking a higher than himself! As the +captain of the Panther sailed his frigate through the seas, so the +great father, the father of his father, the father of all fathers, to +whom the captain kneeled as a little child, sailed through the heaven +of heavens the huge ship of the world, guided fleet upon fleet +innumerable through trackless space! And over an infinitely grander +sea than the measureless ocean of worlds, the Father was carrying +navies of human souls, every soul a world whose affairs none but the +Father could understand, through many a storm, and waterspout, and +battle with the powers of evil, safe to the haven of the children, the +Father's house! And Clare began to understand that so it was. + +One day his father said to him-- + +“Clare, whatever you forget, whatever you remember, mind this--that +you and I and your mother are the children of one father, and that we +have all three to be good children to that father. If we do as he +tells us, he will bring us all at length to the same port. Our admiral +is Jesus Christ. We take our orders from him. But each has to sail his +own ship.” + +The boatswain shook in his wide shoes, but Clare never showed him the +least disfavour. He recognized at once the two officers he had seen at +the menagerie, but beyond giving each a look he could hardly mistake, +he showed no sign of having any knowledge of them. + +He set himself to be a sailor, and learned fast. I need scarcely say +he was as precise in obeying any superior officer as the best sailor +on board. In a few weeks he felt and looked to the manner born--as +indeed he was, for not only his father, but his grandfather, and his +great-grandfather, and more yet of his ancestors,--how many I do not +know, were sailors. + +He had had a rough shaking. The earthquake had come and gone, and come +again and gone a many times. But the shaking earth was his nurse, and +she taught him to dwell in a world that cannot be shaken. + +[Illustration: Clare, Tommy, and the baby in custody.] + +[Illustration: Mrs. Porson finds Clare by the side of his dead mother.] + +[Illustration: Clare is heard talking to Maly.] + +[Illustration: Clare makes friends during Mr. Porson's absence.] + +[Illustration: The blacksmith gives Clare and Tommy a rough greeting.] + +[Illustration: Clare and Abdiel at the locked pump.] + +[Illustration: Clare proceeds to untie the ropes from the ring in the +bull's nose.] + +[Illustration: Clare finds the advantage of a powerful friend.] + +[Illustration: The gardener's discomfiture.] + +[Illustration: Clare asks Miss Shotover to let him carry Ann home.] + +[Illustration: Clare is found giving the shoeblack a lesson.] + +[Illustration: Clare asleep in the puma's cage.] + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Rough Shaking, by George MacDonald + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A ROUGH SHAKING *** + +***** This file should be named 8886-0.txt or 8886-0.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/8/8/8/8886/ + +Produced by Distributed Proofreaders + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: A Rough Shaking + +Author: George MacDonald + + +Release Date: September, 2005 [EBook #8886] +This file was first posted on August 20, 2003 +Last Updated: April 18, 2013 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A ROUGH SHAKING *** + + + + +Produced by Distributed Proofreaders + + + + + + + +A ROUGH SHAKING + +By George MacDonald + + + +Contents. + + Chap. + I. How I came to know Clare Skymer + II. With his parents + III. Without his parents + IV. The new family + V. His new home + VI. What did draw out his first smile + VII. Clare and his brothers + VIII. Clare and his human brothers + IX. Clare the defender + X. The black aunt + XI. Clare on the farm + XII. Clare becomes a guardian of the poor + XIII. Clare the vagabond + XIV. Their first helper + XV. Their first host + XVI. On the tramp + XVII. The baker's cart + XVIII. Beating the town + XIX. The blacksmith and his forge + XX. Tommy reconnoitres + XXI. Tommy is found and found out + XXII. The smith in a rage + XXIII. Treasure trove + XXIV. Justifiable burglary + XXV. A new quest + XXVI. A new entrance + XXVII. The baby has her breakfast + XXVIII. Treachery + XXIX. The baker + XXX. The draper + XXXI. An addition to the family + XXXII. Shop and baby + XXXIII. A bad penny + XXXIV. How things went for a time + XXXV. Clare disregards the interests of his employers + XXXVI. The policeman + XXXVII. The magistrate + XXXVIII. The workhouse + XXXIX. Away + XL. Maly + XLI. The caravans + XLII. Nimrod + XLIII. Across country + XLIV. A third mother + XLV. The menagerie + XLVI. The angel of the wild beasts + XLVII. Glum Gunn + XLVIII. The Puma + XLIX. Glum Gunn's revenge + L. Clare seeks help + LI. Clare a true master + LII. Miss Tempest + LIII. The gardener + LIV. The kitchen + LV. The wheel rests for a time + LVI. Strategy + LVII. Ann Shotover + LVIII. Child-talk + LIX. Lovers' walks + LX. The shoe-black + LXI. A walk with consequences + LXII. The cage of the puma + LXIII. The dome of the angels + LXIV. The panther + LXV. At home + LXVI. The end of Clare Skymer's boyhood + + + Illustrations. + + Clare, Tommy, and the baby in custody + Mrs. Porson finds Clare by the side of his dead mother + Clare is heard talking to Maly + Clare makes friends during Mr. Porson's absence + The blacksmith gives Clare and Tommy a rough greeting + Clare and Abdiel at the locked pump + Clare proceeds to untie the ropes from the ring in the bull's nose + Clare finds the advantage of a powerful friend + The gardener's discomfiture + Clare asks Miss Shotover to let him carry Ann home + Clare is found giving the shoeblack a lesson + Clare asleep in the puma's cage + + + +Dedicated to my great-nephew, Norman MacKay Binney, aged seven, +because his Godfather and Godmother love him dearly. + +Hampstead, August 26, 1890. + + + + +A ROUGH SHAKING. + + + +Chapter I. + +How I Came to know Clare Skymer. + + +It was a day when everything around seemed almost perfect: everything +does, now and then, come nearly right for a moment or two, preparatory +to coming all right for good at the last. It was the third week in +June. The great furnace was glowing and shining in full force, driving +the ship of our life at her best speed through the ocean of space. For +on deck, and between decks, and aloft, there is so much more going on +at one time than at another, that I may well say she was then going at +her best speed, for there is quality as well as rate in motion. The +trees were all well clothed, most of them in their very best. Their +garments were soaking up the light and the heat, and the wind was +going about among them, telling now one and now another, that all was +well, and getting through an immense amount of comfort-work in a +single minute. It said a word or two to myself as often as it passed +me, and made me happier than any boy I know just at present, for I was +an old man, and ought to be more easily made happy than any mere +beginner. + +I was walking through the thin edge of a little wood of big trees, +with a slope of green on my left stretching away into the sunny +distance, and the shadows of the trees on my right lying below my +feet. The earth and the grass and the trees and the air were together +weaving a harmony, and the birds were leading the big orchestra--which +was indeed on the largest scale. For the instruments were so +different, that some of them only were meant for sound; the part of +others was in odour, of others yet in shine, and of still others in +motion; while the birds turned it all as nearly into words as they +could. Presently, to complete the score, I heard the tones of a man's +voice, both strong and sweet. It was talking to some one in a way I +could not understand. I do not mean I could not understand the words: +I was too far off even to hear them; but I could not understand how +the voice came to be so modulated. It was deep, soft, and musical, +with something like coaxing in it, and something of tenderness, and +the intent of it puzzled me. For I could not conjecture from it the +age, or sex, or relation, or kind of the person to whom the words were +spoken. You can tell by the voice when a man is talking to himself; it +ought to be evident when he is talking to a woman; and you can, +surely, tell when he is talking to a child; you could tell if he were +speaking to him who made him; and you would be pretty certain if he +was holding communication with his dog: it made me feel strange that I +could not tell the kind of ear open to the gentle manly voice saying +things which the very sound of them made me long to hear. I confess to +hurrying my pace a little, but I trust with no improper curiosity, to +see--I cannot say the interlocutors, for I had heard, and still heard, +only one voice. + +About a minute's walk brought me to the corner of the wood where it +stopped abruptly, giving way to a field of beautiful grass; and then I +saw something it does not need to be old to be delighted withal: the +boy that would not have taken pleasure in it, I should count half-way +to the gallows. Up to the edge of the wood came, I say, a large +field--acres on acres of the sweetest grass; and dividing it from both +wood and path stood a fence of three bars, which at the moment +separated two as genuine lovers as ever wall of "stones with lime and +hair knit up" could have sundered. On one side of the fence stood a +man whose face I could not see, and on the other one of the loveliest +horses I had ever set eyes upon. I am no better than a middling fair +horseman, but, for this horse's sake, I may be allowed to mention that +my friends will all have me look at any horse they think of buying. +He was over sixteen hands, with well rounded barrel, clean limbs, +small head, and broad muzzle; hollows above his eyes of hazy blue, and +delicacy of feature, revealed him quite an old horse. His ears pointed +forward and downward, as if they wanted on their own account to get a +hold of the man the nose was so busily caressing. Neither, I presume, +had heard my approach; for all true-love-endearments are shy, and the +man had his arm round the horse's neck, and was caressing his face, +talking to him much as Philip Sidney's lady, whose lips "seemed at +once to kiss and speak," murmured to her pet sparrow, only here the +voice was a musical baritone. That there was something between them +more than an ordinary person would be likely to understand appeared +patent. + +Whether or not I made an involuntary sound I cannot tell: I was so +taken with the sight, bearing to me an aspect of something eternal, +that I do not know how I carried myself; but the horse gave a little +start, half lifted his head, saw me, threw it up, uttered a shrill +neigh of warning, stepped hack a pace, and stood motionless, waiting +apparently for an order from his master--if indeed I ought not rather +to call them friends than master and servant. + +The man looked round, saw me, turned toward me, and showing no sign +that my appearance was unexpected, lifted his hat with a courtesy most +Englishmen would reserve for a lady, and advanced a step, almost as if +to welcome a guest. I may have owed something of this reception to the +fact that he saw before him a man advanced in years, for my beard is +very gray, and that by no means prematurely. I saw before me one +nearly, if not quite as old as myself. His hair and beard, both rather +long, were quite white. His face was wonderfully handsome, with the +stillness of a summer sea upon it. Its features were very marked and +regular and fine, for the habit of the man was rather spare. What with +his white hair and beard, and a certain radiance in his pale +complexion, which, I learned afterward, no sun had ever more than +browned a little, he reminded me for a moment as he turned, of Cato on +the shore of Dante's purgatorial island. + +"I fear," I said, "I have intruded!" There was no path where I had +come along. + +The man laughed--and his laugh was more friendly than an invitation to +dinner. + +"The land is mine," he answered; "no one can say you intrude." + +"Thank you heartily. I live not very far off, and know the country +pretty well, but have got into a part of which I am ignorant." + +"You are welcome to go where you will on my property," he answered. +"I could not close a field without some sense of having thrown a +fellow-being into a dungeon. Whatever be the rights of land, space can +belong to the individual only '_as it were_,' to use a Shakspere-phrase. +All the best things have to be shared. The house plainly was designed +for a family." + +While he spoke I scarce heeded his words for looking at the man, so +much he interested me. His face was of the palest health, with a faint +light from within. He looked about sixty years of age. His forehead +was square, and his head rather small, but beautifully modelled; his +eyes were of a light hazel, friendly as those of a celestial +dog. Though slender in build, he looked strong, and every movement +denoted activity. + +I was not ready with an answer to what he said. He turned from me, and +as if to introduce a companion and so render the interview easier, he +called, in tone as gentle as if he spoke to a child, but with that +peculiar intonation that had let me understand it was not to a child +he was speaking, "Memnon! come;" and turned again to me. His movement +and words directed my attention again to the horse, who had stood +motionless. At once, but without sign of haste, the animal walked up +to the rails, rose gently on his hind legs, came over without +touching, walked up to his master, and laid his head on his shoulder. + +I bethought me now who the man was. He had been but a year or two in +the neighbourhood, though the property on which we now stood had been +his own for a good many years. Some said he had bought it; others knew +he had inherited it. All agreed he was a very peculiar person, with +ways so oddly unreasonable that it was evident he had, in his +wanderings over the face of the earth, gradually lost hold of what +sense he might at one time have possessed, and was in consequence a +good deal cracked. There seemed nothing, however, in his behaviour or +appearance to suggest such a conclusion: a man could hardly be counted +beside himself because he was on terms of friendship with his +horse. It took me but a moment to recall his name--Skymer--one odd +enough to assist the memory. I caught it ere he had done mingling +fresh caresses with those of his long-tailed friend. When I came to +know him better, I knew that he had thus given me opportunity--such as +he would to a horse--of thinking whether I should like to know him +better: Mr. Skymer's way was not to offer himself, but to give easy +opportunity to any who might wish to know him. I learned afterward +that he knew my name and suspected my person: being rather prejudiced +in my favour because of the kind of thing I wrote, he was now waiting +to see whether approximation would follow. + +"Pardon my rude lingering," I said; "that lovely animal is enough to +make one desire nearer acquaintance with his owner. I don't think I +ever saw such a perfect creature!" + +I remembered the next moment that I had heard said of Mr. Skymer that +he liked beasts better than men, but I soon found this was only one of +the foolish things constantly said of honest men by those who do not +understand them. + +There are women even who love dogs and dislike children; but, nauseous +fact as this is, it is not so nauseous as the fact that there are men +who believe in no animal rights, or in any God of the animals, and +think we may do what we please with them, indulging at their cost an +insane thirst after knowledge. Injustice may discover facts, but never +truth. + +"I grant him nearly a perfect creature," he answered, "But he is far +more nearly perfect than you yet know him! Excuse me for speaking so +confidently; but if we were half as far on for men, as Memnon is for a +horse, the kingdom of heaven would be a good deal nearer!" + +"He seems an old horse!" + +"He is an old horse--much older than you can think after seeing him +come over that paling as he did. He is forty." + +"Is it possible!" + +"I know and can prove his age as certainly as my own. He is the son of +an Arab mare and an English thoroughbred.--Come here, Memnon!" + +The horse, who had been standing behind like a servant in waiting, put +his beautiful head over his master's shoulder. + +"Memnon," said Mr. Skymer, "go home and tell Mrs. Waterhouse I hope to +bring a gentleman with me to lunch." + +The horse walked gently past us, then started at a quick trot, which +almost immediately became a gallop. + +"The dear fellow," said his master, "would not gallop like that if he +were on the hard road; he knows I would not like it." + +"But, excuse me, how can the animal convey your message?--how +communicate what he knows, if he does understand what you say to him?" + +"He will at least take care that the housekeeper look in his mane for +the knot which perhaps you did not observe me tie in it." + +"You have a code of signals by knots then?" + +"Yes--comprising about half a dozen possibilities.--I hope you do not +object to the message I sent! You will do me the honour of lunching +with me?" + +"You are most kind," I answered--with a little hesitation, I suppose, +fearing to bore my new acquaintance. + +"Don't make me false to horse and housekeeper, Mr. Gowrie," he +resumed.--"I put the horse first, because I could more easily explain +the thing to Mrs. Waterhouse than to Memnon." + +"Could you explain it to Memnon?" + +"I should have a try!" he answered, with a peculiar smile. + +"You hold yourself bound then to keep faith with your horse?" + +"Bound just as with a man--that is, as far as the horse can understand +me. A word understood is binding, whether spoken to horse, or man, or +pig. It makes it the more important that we can do so little, must +work so slowly, for the education of the lower animals. It seems to me +an absolute horror that a man should lie to an inferior creature. Just +think--if an angel were to lie to us! What a shock to find we had been +reposing faith in a devil." + +"Excuse me--I thought you said _an angel_!" + +"When he lied, would he not be a devil?--But let us follow Memnon, and +as we walk I will tell you more about him." + +He turned to the wood. + +"The horse," I said, pointing, "went that way!" + +"Yes," answered his master; "he knew it was nearer for him to take the +long way round. If I had started him and one of the dogs together, the +horse would have gone that way, and the dog taken the path we are now +following." + +We walked a score or two of yards in silence. + +"You promised to tell me more about your wonderful horse!" I said. + +"With pleasure. I delight in talking about my poor brothers and +sisters! Most of them are only savages yet, but there would be far +fewer such if we did not treat them as slaves instead of friends. One +day, however, all will be well for them as for us--thank God." + +"I hope so," I responded heartily. "But please tell me," I said, +"something more about your Memnon." + +Mr. Skymer thought for a moment. + +"Perhaps, after all," he rejoined, "his best accomplishment is that he +can fetch and carry like a dog. I will tell you one of his feats that +way. But first you must know that, having travelled a good deal, and +in some wild countries, I have picked up things it is well to know, +even if not the best of their kind. A man may fail by not knowing the +second best! I was once out on Memnon, five and twenty miles from +home, when I came to a cottage where I found a woman lying ill. I saw +what was wanted. The country was strange to me, and I could not have +found a doctor. I wrote a little pencil-note, fastened it to the +saddle, and told the horse to go home and bring me what the +housekeeper gave him--and not to spare himself. He went off at a +steady trot of ten or twelve miles an hour. I went into the cottage, +and, awaiting his return, did what I could for the woman. I confess I +felt anxious!" + +"You well might," I said: "why should you say _confess_?" + +"Because I had no business to be anxious." + +"It was your business to do all for her you could." + +"I was doing that! If I hadn't been, I should have had good cause to +be anxious! But I knew that another was looking after her; and to be +anxious was to meddle with his part!" + +"I see now," I answered, and said nothing more for some time. + +"What a lather poor Memnon came back in! You should have seen him! He +had been gone nearly five hours, and neither time nor distance +accounted for the state he was in. I did not let him do anything for a +week. I should have had to sit up with him that night, if I had not +been sitting up at any rate. The poor fellow had been caught, and had +made his escape. His bridle was broken, and there were several long +skin wounds in his belly, as if he had scraped the top of a wall set +with bits of glass. How far he had galloped, there was no telling." + +"Not in vain, I hope! The poor woman?" + +"She recovered. The medicine was all right in a pocket under the flap +of the saddle. Before morning she was much better, and lived many +years after. Memnon and I did not lose sight of her.--But you should +have seen the huge creature lying on the floor of that cabin like a +worn-out dog, abandoned and content! I rubbed him down carefully, as +well as I could, and tied my poncho round him, before I let him go to +sleep. Then as soon as my patient seemed quieted for the night, I made +up a big fire of her peats, and they slept like two babies, only they +both snored.--The woman beat," he added with a merry laugh. "It was +the first, almost the only time I ever heard a horse snore.--As we +walked home next day he kept steadily behind me. In general we walked +side by side. Either he felt too tired to talk to me, or he was not +satisfied with himself because of something that had happened the day +before. Perhaps he had been careless, and so allowed himself to be +taken. I do not think it likely." + +"What a loss it will be to you when he dies!" I said. + +He looked grave for an instant, then replied cheerfully-- + +"Of course I shall miss the dear fellow--but not more than he will +miss me; and it will be good for us both." + +"Then," said I,--a little startled, I confess, "you really think--" +and there I stopped. + +"Do _you_ think, Mr. Gowrie," he rejoined, answering my unpropounded +question, "that a God like Jesus Christ, would invent such a delight +for his children as the society and love of animals, and then let +death part them for ever? I don't." + +"I am heartily willing to be your disciple in the matter," I replied. + +"I know well," he resumed, "the vulgar laugh that serves the poor +public for sufficient answer to anything, and the common-place retort: +'You can't give a shadow of proof for your theory!'--to which I +answer, 'I never was the fool to imagine I could; but as surely as you +go to bed at night expecting to rise again in the morning, so surely +do I expect to see my dear old Memnon again when I wake from what so +many Christians call the sleep that knows no waking.'--Think, +Mr. Gowrie, just think of all the children in heaven--what a +superabounding joy the creatures would be to them!--There is one +class, however," he went on, "which I should like to see wait a while +before they got their creatures back;--I mean those foolish women who, +for their own pleasure, so spoil their dogs that they make other +people hate them, doing their best to keep them from rising in the +scale of God's creation." + +"They don't know better!" I said. For every time he stopped, I wanted +to hear what he would say next. + +"True," he answered; "but how much do they want to know the right way +of anything? They have good and lovely instincts--like their dogs, but +do they care that there is a right way and a wrong way of following +them?" + +We walked in silence, and were now coming near the other side of the +small wood. + +"I hope I shall not interfere with your plans for the day!" I said. + +"I seldom have any plans for the day," he answered. "Or if I have, +they are made to break easily. In general I wait. The hour brings its +plans with it--comes itself to tell me what is wanted of me. It has +done so now. And see, there is Memnon again in attendance on us!" + +There, sure enough, was the horse, on the other side of the paling +that here fenced the wood from a well-kept country-road. His long neck +was stretched over it toward his master. + +"Memnon," said Mr. Skymer as we issued by the gate, "I want you to +carry this gentleman home." + +I had often enough in my youth ridden without a saddle, but seldom +indeed without some sort of bridle, however inadequate: I did not, at +the first thought of the thing, relish mounting without one a horse of +which all I knew was that he and his master were on better terms than +I had ever seen man and horse upon before. But even while the thought +was passing through my head, Memnon was lying at my feet, flat as his +equine rotundity would permit. Ashamed of my doubt, I lost not a +moment in placing myself in the position suggested by Sir John +Falstaff to Prince Hal for the defence of his own bulky +carcase--astride the body of the animal, namely. At once he rose and +lifted me into the natural relation of man and horse. Then he looked +round at his master, and they set off at a leisurely pace. + +"You have me captive!" I said. + +"Memnon and I," answered Mr. Skymer, "will do what we can to make your +captivity pleasant." + +A silence followed my thanks. In this procession of horse and foot, we +went about half a mile ere anything more was said worth setting +down. Then began evidence that we were drawing nigh to a house: the +grassy lane between hedges in which we had been moving, was gradually +changing its character. First came trees in the hedge-rows. Then the +hedges gave way to trees--a grand avenue of splendid elms and beeches +alternated. The ground under our feet was the loveliest sward, and +between us and the sun came the sweetest shadow. A glad heave but +instant subsidence of the live power under me, let me know Memnon's +delight at feeling the soft elastic turf under his feet: he had said +to himself, "Now we shall have a gallop!" but immediately checked the +thought with the reflection that he was no longer a colt ignorant of +manners. + +"What a lovely road the turf makes!" I said. "It is a lower +sky--solidified for feet that are not yet angelic." + +My host looked up with a brighter smile than he had shown before. + +"It is the only kind of road I really like," he said, "--though turf +has its disadvantages! I have as much of it about the place as it will +bear. Such roads won't do for carriages!" + +"You ride a good deal, I suppose?" + +"I do. I was at one time so accustomed to horseback that, without +thinking, I was not aware whether I was on my horse's feet or my own." + +"Where, may I ask, does my friend who is now doing me the favour to +carry 'this weight and size,' come from?" + +"He was born in England, but his mother was a Syrian--of one of the +oldest breeds there known. He was born into my arms, and for a week +never touched the ground. Next month, as I think I mentioned, he will +be forty years old!" + +"It is a great age for a horse!" I said. + +"The more the shame as well as the pity!" he answered. + +"Then you think horses might live longer?" + +"Much longer than they are allowed to live in this country," he +answered. "And a part of our punishment is that we do not know +them. We treat them so selfishly that they do not live long enough to +become our friends. At present there are but few men worthy of their +friendship. What else is a man's admiration, when it is without love +or respect or justice, but a bitter form of despite! It is small +wonder there should be so many stupid horses, when they receive so +little education, have such bad associates, and die so much too young +to have gained any ripe experience to transmit to their +posterity. Where would humanity be now, if we all went before +five-and-twenty?" + +"I think you must be right. I have myself in my possession at this +moment, given me by one who loved her, an ink-stand made from the hoof +of a pony that died at the age of at least forty-two, and did her part +of the work of a pair till within a year or two of her death.--Poor +little Zephyr!" + +"Why, Mr. Gowrie, you talk of her as if she were a Christian!" +exclaimed Mr. Skymer. + +"That's how you talked of Memnon a moment ago! Where is the +difference? Not in the size, though Memnon would make three of +Zephyr!" + +"I didn't say _poor Memnon_, did I? You said _poor Zephyr_! That is +the way Christians talk about their friends gone home to the grand old +family mansion! Why they do, they would hardly like one to tell them!" + +"It is true," I responded. "I understand you now! I don't think I ever +heard a widow speak of her departed husband without putting _poor_, or +_poor dear_, before his name.--By the way, when you hear a woman speak +of her _late_ husband, can you help thinking her ready to marry +again?" + +"It does sound as if she had done with him! But here we are at the +gate!--Call, Memnon." + +The horse gave a clear whinny, gentle, but loud enough to be heard at +some distance. It was a tall gate of wrought iron, but Memnon's +summons was answered by one who could clear it--though not open it any +more than he: a little bird, which I was not ornithologist enough to +recognize--mainly because of my short-sightedness, I hope--came +fluttering from the long avenue within, perched on the top of the +gate, looked down at our party for a moment as if debating the +prudent, dropped suddenly on Memnon's left ear, and thence to his +master's shoulder, where he sat till the gate was opened. The little +one went half-way up the inner avenue with us, making several flights +and returns before he left us. + +The boy that opened the gate, a chubby little fellow of seven, looked +up in Mr. Skymer's face as if he had been his father and king in one, +and stood gazing after him as long as he was in sight. I noticed +also--who could have failed to notice?--that every now and then a bird +would drop from the tree we were passing under, and alight for a +minute on my host's head. Once when he happened to uncover it, seven +or eight perched together upon it. One tiny bird got caught in his +beard by the claws. + +"You cannot surely have tamed _all_ the birds in your grounds!" I +said. + +"If I have," he answered, "it has been by permitting them to be +themselves." + +"You mean it is the nature of birds to be friendly with man?" + +"I do. Through long ages men have been their enemies, and so have +alienated them--they too not being themselves." + +"You mean that unfriendliness is not natural to men?" + +"It cannot be human to be cruel!" + +"How is it, then, that so many boys are careless what suffering they +inflict?" + +"Because they have in them the blood of men who loved cruelty, and +never repented of it." + +"But how do you account for those men loving cruelty--for their being +what you say is contrary to their nature?" + +"Ah, if I could account for that, I should be at the secret of most +things! All I meant to half-explain was, how it came that so many who +have no wish to inflict suffering, yet are careless of inflicting it." + +I saw that we must know each other better before he would quite open +his mind to me. I saw that though, hospitable of heart, he threw his +best rooms open to all, there were others in his house into which he +did not invite every acquaintance. + +The avenue led to a wide gravelled space before a plain, low, long +building in whitish stone, with pillared portico. In the middle of the +space was a fountain, and close to it a few chairs. Mr. Skymer begged +me to be seated. Memnon walked up to the fountain, and lay down, that +I might get off his back as easily as I had got on it. Once down, he +turned on his side, and lay still. + +"The air is so mild," said my host, "I fancy you will prefer this to +the house." + +"Mild!" I rejoined; "I should call it hot!" + +"I have been so much in real heat!" he returned. "Notwithstanding my +love of turf, I keep this much in gravel for the sake of the desert." + +I took the seat he offered me, wondering whether Memnon was +comfortable where he lay; and, absorbed in the horse, did not see my +host go to the other side of the basin. Suddenly we were "clothed +upon" with a house which, though it came indeed from the earth, might +well have come direct from heaven: a great uprush of water spread +above us a tent-like dome, through which the sun came with a cool, +broken, almost frosty glitter. We seemed in the heart of a huge +soap-bubble. I exclaimed with delight. + +"I thought you would enjoy my sun-shade!" said Mr. Skymer. "Memnon and +I often come here of a hot morning, when nobody wants us. Don't we, +Memnon?" + +The horse lifted his nose a little, and made a low soft noise, a chord +of mingled obedience and delight--a moan of pleasure mixed with a +half-born whinny. + +We had not been seated many moments, and had scarcely pushed off the +shore of silence into a new sea of talk, when we were interrupted by +the invasion of half a dozen dogs. They were of all sorts down to no +sort. Mr. Skymer called one of them Tadpole--I suppose because he had +the hugest tail, while his legs were not visible without being looked +for. + +"That animal," said his master, "--he looks like a dog, but who would +be positive what he was!--is the cleverest in the pack. He seems to me +a rare individuality. His ancestors must have been of all sorts, and +he has gathered from them every good quality possessed by each. Think +what a man might be--made up that way!" + +"Why is there no such man?" I said. + +"There may be some such men. There must be many one day," he answered, +"--but not for a while yet. Men must first be made willing to be +noble." + +"And you don't think men willing to be made noble?" + +"Oh yes! willing enough, some of them, to be _made_ noble!" + +"I do not understand. I thought you said they were not!" + +"They are willing enough _to be made_ noble; but that is very +different from being willing _to be_ noble: that takes trouble. How +can any one become noble who desires it so little as not to fight for +it!" + +The man drew me more and more. He had a way of talking about things +seldom mentioned except in dull fashion in the pulpit, as if he cared +about them. He spoke as of familiar things, but made you feel he was +looking out of a high window. There are many who never speak of real +things except in a false tone; this man spoke of such without an atom +of assumed solemnity--in his ordinary voice: they came into his mind +as to their home--not as dreams of the night, but as facts of the day. + +I sat for a while, gazing up through the thin veil of water at the +blue sky so far beyond. I thought how like that veil was to our little +life here, overdomed by that boundless foreshortening of space. The +lines in Shelley's _Adonais_ came to me: + + "Life, like a dome of many-coloured glass, + Stains the white radiance of Eternity, + Until Death tramples it to fragments." + +Then I thought of what my host had said concerning the too short lives +of horses, and wondered what he would say about those of dogs. + +"Dogs are more intelligent than horses," I said: "why do they live a +yet shorter time?" + +"I doubt if you would say so in an Arab's tent," he returned. "If you +had said, 'still more affectionate,' I should have known better how to +answer you." + +"Then I do say so," I replied. + +"And I return, that is just why they live no longer. They do not find +the world good enough for them, die, and leave it." + +"They have a much happier life than horses!" + +"Many dogs than some horses, I grant." + +That instant arose what I fancied must be an unusual sound in the +place: two of the dogs were fighting. The master got up. I thought +with myself, "Now we shall see his notions of discipline!" nor had I +long to wait. In his hand was a small riding-whip, which I afterward +found he always carried in avoidance of having to inflict a heavier +punishment from inability to inflict a lighter; for he held that in +all wrong-doing man can deal with, the kindest thing is not only to +punish, but, with animals especially, to punish at once. He ran to the +conflicting parties. They separated the moment they heard the sound of +his coming. One came cringing and crawling to his feet; the other--it +was the nondescript Tadpole--stood a little way off, wagging his tail, +and cocking his head up in his master's face. He gave the one at his +feet several pretty severe cuts with the whip, and sent him off. The +other drew nearer. His master turned away and took no notice of him. + +"May I ask," I said, when he returned to his seat, "why you did not +punish both the animals for their breach of the peace?" + +"They did not both deserve it." + +"How could you tell that? You were not looking when the quarrel +began!" + +"Ah, but you see I know the dogs! One of them--I saw at a glance how +it was--had found a bone, and dog-rule about finding is, that what you +find is yours. The other, notwithstanding, wanted a share. It was +Tadpole who found the bone, and he--partly from his sense of +justice--cannot endure to have his claims infringed upon. Every dog of +them knows that Tadpole must be in the right." + +"He looked as if he expected you to approve of his conduct!" + +"Yes, that is the worst of Tadpole! he is so self-righteous as to +imagine he deserves praise for standing on his rights! He is but a +dog, you see, and knows no better!" + +"I noticed you disregarded his appeal." + +"I was not going to praise him for nothing!" + +"You expect them to understand your treatment?" + +"No one can tell how infinitesimally small the beginnings of +understanding, as of life, may be. The only way to make animals +reasonable--more reasonable, I mean--is to treat them as +reasonable. Until you can go down into the abysses of creation, you +cannot know when a nature begins to see a difference in quality +of action." + +"I confess," I said, "Mr. Tadpole did seem a little ashamed as he went +away." + +"And you see Blanco White at my feet, taking care not to touch +them. He is giving time, he thinks, for my anger to pass." + +He laughed the merriest laugh. The dog looked up eagerly, but dropped +his head again. + +If I go on like this, however, I shall have to take another book to +tell the story for which I began the present! In short, I was drawn to +the man as never to another since the friend of my youth went where I +shall go to seek and find him one day--or, more likely, one solemn +night. I was greatly his inferior, but love is a quick divider of +shares: he that gathers much has nothing over, and he that gathers +little has no lack. I soon ceased to think of him as my _new_ friend, +for I seemed to have known him before I was born. + +I am going to tell the early part of his history. If only I could tell +it as it deserves to be told! The most interesting story may be so +narrated as that only the eyes of a Shakspere could spy the shine +underneath its dull surface. + +He never told me any great portion of the tale of his life +continuously. One thing would suggest another--generally with no +connection in time. I have pieced the parts together myself. He did +indeed set out more than once or twice to give me his history, but +always we got discussing something, and so it was interrupted. + +I will not write what I have set in order as if he were himself +narrating: the most modest man in the world would that way be put at a +disadvantage. The constant recurrence of the capital _I_, is apt to +rouse in the mind of the reader, especially if he be himself +egotistic, more or less of irritation at the egotism of the +narrator--while in reality the freedom of a man's personal utterance +_may_ be owing to his lack of the egotistic. Partly for my +friend's sake, therefore, I shall tell the story as--what indeed it +is--a narrative of my own concerning him. + + + +Chapter II + +With his parents. + + +The lingering, long-drawn-out _table d'hte_ dinner was just over in +one of the inns on the _cornice_ road. The gentlemen had gone into the +garden, and some of the ladies to the _salotto_, where open windows +admitted the odours of many a flower and blossoming tree, for it was +toward the end of spring in that region. One had sat down to a +tinkling piano, and was striking a few chords, more to her own +pleasure than that of the company. Two or three were looking out into +the garden, where the diaphanous veil of twilight had so speedily +thickened to the crape of night, its darkness filled with thousands of +small isolated splendours--fire-flies, those "golden boats" never seen +"on a sunny sea," but haunting the eves of the young summer, pulsing, +pulsing through the dusky air with seeming aimlessness, like sweet +thoughts that have no faith to bind them in one. A tall, graceful +woman stood in one of the windows alone. She had never been in Italy +before, had never before seen fire-flies, and was absorbed in the +beauty of their motion as much as in that of their golden +flashes. Each roving star had a tide in its light that rose and ebbed +as it moved, so that it seemed to push itself on by its own radiance, +ever waxing and waning. In wide, complicated dance, they wove a huge, +warpless tapestry with the weft of an ever vanishing aureate +shine. The lady, an Englishwoman evidently, gave a little sigh and +looked round, regretting, apparently, that her husband was not by her +side to look on the loveliness that woke a faint-hued fairy-tale in +her heart. The same moment he entered the room and came to her. He was +a man above the middle height, and from the slenderness of his figure, +looked taller than he was. He had a vivacity of motion, a readiness to +turn on his heel, a free swing of the shoulders, and an erect carriage +of the head, which all marked him a man of action: one that speculated +on his calling would immediately have had his sense of fitness +satisfied when he heard that he was the commander of an English +gun-boat, which he was now on his way to Genoa to join. He was +young--within the twenties, though looking two or three and thirty, +his face was so browned by sun and wind. His features were regular and +attractive, his eyes so dark that the liveliness of their movement +seemed hardly in accord with the weight of their colour. His wife was +very fair, with large eyes of the deepest blue of eyes. She looked +delicate, and was very lovely. They had been married about five +years. A friend had brought them in his yacht as far as Nice, and they +were now going on by land. From Genoa the lady must find her way home +without her husband. + +The lights in the room having been extinguished that the few present +might better see the fire-flies, he put his arm round her waist. + +"I'm so glad you're come, Henry!" she said, favoured by the piano. "I +was uncomfortable at having the lovely sight all to myself!" + +"It is lovely, darling!" he rejoined; then, after a moment's pause, +added, "I hope you will be able to sleep without the sea to rock you!" + +"No fear of that!" she answered. "The stillness will be delightful. I +was thoroughly reconciled to the motion of the yacht," she went on, +"but there is a satisfaction in feeling the solid earth under you, and +knowing it will keep steady all night." + +"I am glad you like the change. I never sleep the first night on +shore.--I cannot tell what it is, but somehow I keep wishing Fyvie +could have taken us all the way." + +"Never mind, love. I will keep awake with you." + +"It's not that! How could I mind lying awake with you beside me! Oh +Grace, you don't know, you cannot know, what you are to me! I don't +feel in the least that you're my other half, as people say. You're not +like a part of myself at all; to think so would be sacrilege! You are +quite another, else how could you be mine! You make me forget myself +altogether. When I look at you, I stand before an enchanted mirror +that cannot show what is in front of it." + +"No, Harry; I'm a true mirror, for I hold that inside me which remains +outside me." + +"I fear you've got beyond me!" said her husband, laughing. "You always +do!" + +"Yes, at nonsense, Harry." + +"Then your speech was nonsense, was it?" + +"No; it was full of sense. But think of something you would like me to +say; I must fetch the boy to see the fire-flies; when I come back I +will say it." + +She left the room. Her husband stood where he was, gazing out, with a +tender look in his face that deepened to sadness--whether from the +haunting thought of his wife's delicate health and his having to leave +her, or from some strange foreboding, I cannot tell. When presently +she returned with their one child in her arms, he made haste to take +him from her. + +"My darling," he said, "he is much too heavy for you! How stupid of me +not to think of it! If you don't promise me never to do that at home, +I will take him to sea with me!" + +The child, a fair, bright boy, the sleep in whose eyes had turned to +wonder, for they seemed to see everything, and be quite satisfied with +nothing, went readily to his father, but looked back at his +mother. The only sign he gave that he was delighted with the +fire-flies was, that he looked now to the one, now to the other of his +parents, speechless, with shining eyes. He knew they were feeling just +like himself. Silent communion was enough. + +The father turned to carry him back to bed. The mother turned to look +after them. As she did so, her eyes fell upon two or three delicate, +small-leaved plants--I do not know what they were--that stood in pots +on the balcony in front of the open window: they were shivering. The +night was perfectly still, but their leaves trembled as with an +ague-fit. + +"Look, Harry! What is that?" she cried, pointing to them. + +He turned and looked, said it must be some loaded wagon passing, and +went off with the child. + +"I hope to-morrow will be just like to-day!" said his wife when he +returned. "What shall we do with it?--our one real holiday, you know!" + +"I have a notion in my head," he answered. "That little town Georgina +spoke of, is not far from here--among the hills: shall we go and see +it?" + + + +Chapter III. + +Without his parents. + + +The sun in England seems to shine because he cannot help it; the sun +in Italy seems to shine because he means it, and wants to mean +it. Thus he shone the next morning, including in his attentions a +curious little couple, husband and wife, who, attended by a guide, and +borne by animals which might be mules and might be donkeys, and were +not lovely to look on except through sympathy with their ugliness, +were slowly ascending a steep terraced and zigzagged road, with olive +trees above and below them. They were on the south side of the hill, +and the olives gave them none of the little shadow they have in their +power, for the trees next the sun were always below the road. The man +often wiped his red, innocent face, and looked not a little +distressed; but the lady, although as stout as he, did not seem to +suffer, perhaps because she was sheltered by a very large bonnet After +a silence of a good many minutes, she was the first to speak. + +"I can't say but I'm disappointed in the olives, Thomas," she +remarked. "They ain't much to keep the sun off you!" + +"They wouldn't look bad along a brookside in Essex!" returned her +husband. "Here they do seem a bit out of place!" + +"Well, but, poor things! how are they to help it--with only a trayful +of earth under their feet! If you planted a priest on a terrace he +would soon be as thin as they!" + +They had just passed a very stout priest, in a low broad hat, and +cassock, and she laughed merrily at her small joke. They were an +English country parson and his wife, abroad for the first time in +their now middle-aged lives, and happy as children just out of +school. Incapable of disliking anybody, there was no unkindness in +Mrs. Porson's laughter. + +"I don't see," she resumed, "how they ever can have a picnic in such a +country!" + +"Why not?" + +"There's no place to sit down!" + +"Here's a whole hill-side!" + +"But so hard!" she answered. "There's not an inch of turf or grass in +any direction!" + +The pair--equally plump, and equally good-natured--laughed together. + +I need not give more of their talk. It was better than most talk, yet +not worth recording. Their guide, perceiving that they knew no more of +Italian than he did of English, had withdrawn to the rear, and stumped +along behind them all the way, holding much converse with his donkeys +however, admonishing now this one, now that one, and seeming not a +little hurt with their behaviour, to judge from the expostulations +that accompanied his occasionally more potent arguments. Assuredly the +speed they made was small; but it was a festa, and hot. + +They were on the way to a small town some distance from the shore, on +the crest of the hill they were now ascending. It would, from the +number of its inhabitants, have been in England a village, but there +are no villages in the Riviera. However insignificant a place may be, +it is none the less a town, possibly a walled town. Somebody had told +Mr. and Mrs. Person they ought to visit Graffiacane, and to +Graffiacane they were therefore bound: why they ought to visit it, and +what was to be seen there, they took the readiest way to know. + +The place was indeed a curious one, high among the hills, and on the +top of its own hill, with approaches to it like the trenches of a +siege. All the old towns in that region seem to have climbed up to +look over the heads of other things. Graffiacane saw over hills and +valleys and many another town--each with its church standing highest, +the guardian of the flock of houses beneath it; saw over many a +water-course, mostly dry, with lovely oleanders growing in the middle +of it; saw over multitudinous oliveyards and vineyards; saw over mills +with great wheels, and little ribbons of water to drive them--running +sometimes along the tops of walls to get at their work; saw over +rugged pines, and ugly, verdureless, raw hillsides--away to the sea, +lying in the heat like a heavenly vat in which all the tails of all +the peacocks God was making, lay steeped in their proper dye. Numerous +were the sharp turns the donkeys made in their ascent; and at this +corner and that, the sweetest life-giving wind would leap out upon the +travellers, as if it had been lying there in wait to surprise them +with the heavenliest the old earth, young for all her years, could +give them. But they were getting too tired to enjoy anything, and were +both indeed not far from asleep on the backs of their humble beasts, +when a sudden, more determined yet more cheerful assault of their +guide upon his donkeys, roused both them and their riders; and looking +sleepily up, with his loud _heeoop_ ringing in their ears, and a sense +of the insidious approach of two headaches, they saw before them the +little town, its houses gathered close for protection, like a brood of +chickens, and the white steeple of the church rising above them, like +the neck of the love-valiant hen. + +Passing through the narrow arch of the low-browed gateway, hot as was +the hour, a sudden cold struck to their bones. For not a ray of light +shone into the narrow street. The houses were lofty as those of a +city, and parted so little by the width of the street that friends on +opposite sides might almost from their windows have shaken +hands. Narrow, rough, steep old stone-stairs ran up between and inside +the houses, all the doors of which were open to the air--here, +however, none of the sweetest. Everywhere was shadow; everywhere one +or another evil odour; everywhere a look of abject and dirty +poverty--to an English eye, that is. Everywhere were pretty children, +young, slatternly mothers, withered-up grandmothers, the gleam of +glowing reds and yellows, and the coolness of subdued greens and fine +blues. Such at least was the composite first impression made on Mr. +and Mrs. Porson. As it was a festa, more men than usual were looking +out of cavern-like doorways or over hand-wrought iron balconies, were +leaning their backs against door-posts, and smoking as if too lazy to +stop. Many of the women were at prayers in the church. All was +orderly, and quieter than usual for a festa. None could have told the +reason; the townsfolk were hardly aware that an undefinable oppression +was upon them--an oppression that lay also upon their visitors, and +the donkeys that had toiled with them up the hills and slow-climbing +valleys. + +It added to the gloom and consequent humidity of the town that the +sides of the streets were connected, at the height of two or perhaps +three stories, by thin arches--mere jets of stone from the one house +to the other, with but in rare instance the smallest superstructure to +keep down the key of the arch. Whatever the intention of them, they +might seem to serve it, for the time they had straddled there +undisturbed had sufficed for moss and even grass to grow upon those +which Mr. Porson now regarded with curious speculation. A bit of an +architect, and foiled, he summoned at last what Italian he could, +supplemented it with Latin and a terminational _o_ or _a_ tacked to +any French or English word that offered help, and succeeded, as he +believed, in gathering from a by-stander, that the arches were there +because of the earthquakes. + +He had not language enough of any sort to pursue the matter, else he +would have asked his informant how the arch they were looking at could +be of any service, seeing it had no weight on the top, and but a +slight endlong pressure must burst it up. Turning away to tell his +wife what he had learned, he was checked by a low rumbling, like +distant thunder, which he took for the firing of festa guns, having +discovered that Italians were fond of all kinds of noises. The next +instant they felt the ground under their feet move up and down and +from side to side with confused motion. A sudden great cry arose. One +moment and down every stair, out of every door, like animals from +their holes, came men, women, and children, with a rush. The +earthquake was upon them. + +But in such narrow streets, the danger could hardly be less than +inside the houses, some of which, the older especially, were ill +constructed--mostly with boulder-stones that had neither angles nor +edges, hence little grasp on each other beyond what the friction of +their weight, and the adhesion of their poor old friable cement, gave +them; for the Italians, with a genius for building, are careless of +certain constructive essentials. After about twenty seconds of +shaking, the lonely pair began to hear, through the noise of the cries +of the people, some such houses as these rumbling to the earth. + +They were far more bewildered than frightened. They were both of good +nerve, and did not know the degree of danger they were in, while the +strangeness of the thing contributed to an excitement that helped +their courage. I cannot say how they might have behaved in an hotel +full of their countrymen and countrywomen, running and shrieking, and +altogether comporting themselves as if they knew there was no God. The +fear on all sides might there have infected them; but the terror of +the inhabitants who knew better than they what the thing meant, did +not much shake them. For one moment many of the people stood in the +street motionless, pale, and staring; the next they all began to run, +some for the gateway, but the greater part up the street, staggering +as they ran. The movement of the ground was indeed small--not more, +perhaps, than half an inch in any direction--but fear and imagination +weakened all their limbs. They had not run far, however, before the +terrible unrest ceased as suddenly as it had begun. + +The English pair drew a long breath where they stood--for they had not +stirred a step, or indeed thought whither to run--and imagining it +over for a hundred years, looked around them. Their guide had +disappeared. The two donkeys stood perfectly still with their heads +hanging down. They seemed in deep dejection, and incapable of +movement. A few men only were yet to be seen. They were running up the +street. In a moment more it would be empty. They were the last of +those that had let the women go to church without them. They were +hurrying to join them in the sanctuary, the one safe place: the rest +of the town might be shaken in heaps on its foundations, but the +church would stand! Guessing their goal, the Porsons followed +them. But they were neither of a build nor in a condition to make +haste, and the road was uphill. No one place, however, was far from +another within the toy-town, and they came presently to an open +_piazza_, on the upper side of which rose the great church. It had a +square front, masking with its squareness the triangular gable of the +building. Upon this screen, in the brightest of colours, magenta and +sky-blue predominating, was represented the day of judgment--the +mother seated on the right hand of the judge, and casting a pitiful +look upon the miserable assembly on her left. The square was a good +deal on the slope, and as they went slowly up to the church, they kept +looking at the picture. The last tatters of the skirt of the crowd had +disappeared through the great door, and but for themselves the square +was empty. All at once the picture at which they were gazing, the +spread of wall on which it was painted, the whole bulk of the huge +building began to shudder, and went on shuddering--"just," Mr. Porson +used to say when describing the thing to a friend, "like the skin of a +horse determined to get rid of a gad-fly." The same moment the tiles +on the roof began to clatter like so many castanets in the hands of +giants, and the ground to wriggle and heave. But they were too much +absorbed in what was before their eyes to heed much what went on under +their feet. The oscillatory displacement of the front of the church +did not at most seem to cover more than a hand-breadth, but it was +enough. Down came the plaster surface, with the judge and his mother, +clashing on the pavement below, while the good and the bad yet stood +trembling. A few of the people came running out, thinking the open +square after all safer than the church, but there was no rush to the +open air. The shaking had lasted about twenty seconds, or at most half +a minute, when, without indication to the eyes watching the front, +there came a roaring crash and a huge rumbling, through and far above +which, rose a multitudinous shriek of terror, dismay, and agony, and a +number of men and women issued as if shot from a catapult. Then a few +came straggling out, and then--no more. The roof had fallen upon the +rest. + +With the first rush from the church, the shaking ceased utterly, and +the still earth seemed again the immovable thing the English +spectators had conceived her. Of what had taken place there was little +sign on the earth, no sign in the blue sun-glorious heaven; only in +the air there was a cloud of dust so thick as to look almost solid, +and from the cloud, as it seemed, came a ghastly cry, mingled of +shrieks and groans and articulate appeals for help. The cry kept on +issuing, while the calm front of the church, dominated by that +frightful canopy, went on displaying the assembled nations delivered +from their awful judge. While the multitude groaned within, it spread +itself out to the sun in silent composure, welcoming and cherishing +his rays in what was left of its gorgeous hues. + +The Porsons stood for a moment stunned, came to their senses, and made +haste to enter the building. With white faces and trembling hands, +they drew aside the heavy leather curtain that hung within the great +door, but could for a moment see nothing; the air inside seemed filled +with a solid yellow dust As their eyes recovered from the sudden +change of sunlight for gloom, however, they began to distinguish the +larger outlines, and perceived that the floor was one confused heap of +rafters and bricks and tiles and stones and lime. The centre of the +roof had been a great dome; now there was nothing between their eyes +and the clear heaven but the slowly vanishing cloud of ruin. In the +mound below they could at first distinguish nothing human--could not +have told, in the dim chaos, limbs from broken rafters. Eager to help, +they dared not set their feet upon the mass--not that they feared the +walls which another shock might bring upon their heads, but that they +shuddered lest their own added weight should crush some live human +creature they could not descry. Three or four who had received little +or no hurt, were moving about the edges of the heap, vaguely trying to +lift now this, now that, but yielding each attempt in despair, either +from its evident uselessness, or for lack of energy. They would give a +pull at a beam that lay across some writhing figure, find it +immovable, and turn with a groan to some farther cry. How or where +were they to help? Others began to come in with white faces and +terror-stricken eyes; and before long the sepulchral ruin had little +groups all over it, endeavouring in shiftless fashion to bring rescue +to the prisoned souls. + +The Porsons saw nothing they could do. Great beams and rafters which +it was beyond their power to move an inch, lay crossed in all +directions; and they could hold little communication with those who +were in a fashion at work. Alas, they were little better than vainly +busy, while the louder moans accompanying their attempts revealed that +they added to the tortures of those they sought to deliver! The two +saw more plainly now, and could distinguish contorted limbs, and here +and there a countenance. The silence, more and more seldom broken, was +growing itself terrible. Had they known how many were buried there, +they would have wondered so few were left able to cry out. At moments +there was absolute stillness in the dreadful place. The heart of +Mrs. Porson began to sink. + +"Do come out," she whispered, afraid of her own voice. "I feel so sick +and faint, I fear I shall drop." + +As she spoke something touched her leg. She gave a cry and started +aside. It was a hand, but of the body to which it belonged nothing +could be seen. It must have been its last movement; now it stuck there +motionless. Then they spied amid sad sights a sadder still. Upon the +heap, a little way from its edge, sat a child of about three, dressed +like a sailor, gazing down at something--they could not see +what. Going a little nearer, they saw it--the face of a fair woman, +evidently English, who lay dead, with a great beam across her +heart. The child showed no trace of tears; his white face seemed +frozen. The stillness upon it was not despair, but suggested a world +in which hope had never yet been born. Pity drove Mrs. Porson's +sickness away. + +"My dear!" she said; but the child took no heed. Her voice, however, +seemed to wake something in him. He started to his feet, and rushing +at the beam, began to tug at it with his tiny hands. Mrs. Porson burst +into tears. + +"It's no use, darling!" she cried. + +"Wake mamma!" he said, turning, and looking up at her. + +"She will not wake," sobbed Mrs. Porson. + +Her husband stood by speechless, choking back the tears of which, +being an Englishman, he was ashamed. + +"She _will_ wake," returned the boy. "She always wakes when I kiss +her." + +He knelt beside her, to prove upon her white face the efficacy of the +measure he had never until now known to fail. That he had already +tried it was plain, for he had kissed away much of the dust, though +none of the death. When once more he found that she did not even close +her lips to return his passionate salute, he desisted. With that +saddest of things, a child's sigh, and a look that seemed to Mrs. +Porson to embody the riddle of humanity, he reseated himself on the +beam, with his little feet on his mother's bosom, where so often she +had made them warm. He did not weep; he did not fix his eyes on his +mother; his look was level and moveless and set upon nothing. He +seemed to have before him an utter blank--as if the outer wall of +creation had risen frowning in front, and he knew there was nothing +behind it but chaos. + +"Where is your papa?" asked Mr. Porson. + +The boy looked round bewildered. + +"Gone," he answered; nor could they get anything more from him. + +"Was your papa with you here?" asked Mrs. Porson. + +He answered only with the word _Gone_, uttered in a dazed fashion. + +By this time all the men left in the town were doing their best, under +the direction of an intelligent man, the priest of a neighbouring +parish. They had already got one or two out alive, and their own +priest dead. They worked well, their terror of the lurking earthquake +forgotten in their eagerness to rescue. From their ignorance of the +language, however, Mr. Porson saw they could be of little use; and in +dread of doing more harm than good, he judged it better to go. + +They stood one moment and looked at each other in silence. The child +had dropped from the beam, and lay fast asleep across his mother's +bosom, with his head on a lump of mortar. Without a word spoken, +Mrs. Person, picking her way carefully to the spot, knelt down by the +dead mother, tenderly kissed her cheek, lifted the sleeping child, and +with all the awe, and nearly all the tremulous joy of first +motherhood, bore him to her husband. The throes of the earthquake had +slain the parents, and given the child into their arms. Without look +of consultation, mark of difference, or sign of agreement, they turned +in silence and left the terrible church, with the clear summer sky +looking in upon its dead. + +As they passed the door, the sun met them shining with all his +might. The sea, far away across the tops of hills and the clefts of +valleys, lay basking in his glory. The hot air quivered all over the +wide landscape. From the flight of steps in front of the church they +looked down on the streets of the town, and beyond them into space. It +looked the best of all possible worlds--as neither plague, famine, +pestilence, earthquakes, nor human wrongs, persuade me it is not, +judged by the high intent of its existence. When a man knows that +intent, as I dare to think I do, _then_ let him say, and not till +then, whether it be a good world or not. That in the midst of the +splendour of the sunny day, in the midst of olives and oranges, grapes +and figs, ripening swiftly by the fervour of the circumambient air, +should lie that charnel-church, is a terrible fact, neither to be +ignored, nor to be explained by the paltry theory of the greatest good +to the greatest number; but the end of the maker's dream is not this. + +When they turned into the street that led to the gate, they found the +donkeys standing where they had left them. Their owner was not with +them. He had gone into the church with the rest, and was killed. When +they caught sight of the patient, dejected animals, unheeded and +unheeding, then first they spoke, whispering in the awful stillness of +the world: they must take the creatures, and make the best of their +way back without a guide! They judged that, as the road was chiefly +down hill, and the donkeys would be going home, they would not have +much difficulty with them. At the worst, short and stout as they were, +they were not bad walkers, and felt more than equal to carrying the +child between them. Not a person was in the street when they mounted; +almost all were in the church, at its strange, terrible service. Mrs. +Porson mounted the strongest of the animals, her husband placed the +sleeping child in her arms, and they started, he on foot by the side +of his wife, and his donkey following. No one saw them pass through +the gate of the town. + +They were not sure of the way, for they had been partly asleep as they +came, but so long as they went downward, and did not leave the road, +they could hardly go wrong! The child slept all the way. + + + +Chapter IV. + +The new family. + + +How shall a man describe what passed in the mind of a childless wife, +with a motherless boy in her arms! It is the loveliest provision, +doubtless, that every child should have a mother of his own; but there +is a mother-love--which I had almost called more divine--the love, +namely, that a woman bears to a child because he is a child, +regardless of whether he be her own or another's. It is that they may +learn to love thus, that women have children. Some women love so +without having any. No conceivable treasure of the world could have +once entered into comparison with the burden of richness Mrs. Porson +bore. She told afterward, with voice hushed by fear of irreverence, +how, as they went down one of the hills, she slept for a moment, and +dreamed that she was Mary with the holy thing in her arms, fleeing to +Egypt on the ass, with Joseph, her husband, walking by her side. For +years and years they had been longing for a child--and here lay the +divinest little one, with every mark of the kingdom upon him! His +father and mother lying crushed under the fallen dome of that fearful +church, was it strange he should seem to belong to her? + +But there might be some one somewhere in the world with a better +claim; possibly--horrible thought!--with more need of him than she! Up +started a hideous cupidity, a fierce temptation to dishonesty, such as +she had never imagined. We do not know what is in us until the +temptation comes. Then there is the devil to fight. And Mrs. Porson +fought him. + +Mr. Porson was, in a milder degree, affected much as his wife. He +could not help wishing, nor was he wrong in wishing, that, since the +child's father and mother were gone, they might take their place, and +love their orphan. They were far from rich, but what was one child! +They might surely manage to give him a good education, and set him +doing for himself! But, alas, there might be others--others with +love-property in the child! The same thoughts were working in each, +but neither dared utter them in the presence of the sleeping treasure. + +As they descended the last slope above the town, with the wide +sea-horizon before them, they beheld such a glory of after-sunset as, +even on that coast, was unusual. A chord of colour that might have +been the prostrate fragment of a gigantic rainbow, lay along a large +arc of the horizon. The farther portion of the sea was an indigo blue, +save for a grayish line that parted it from the dusky red of the +sky. This red faded up through orange and dingy yellow to a pale green +and pale blue, above which came the depth of the blue night, in which +rayed resplendent the evening star. Below the star and nearer to the +west, lay, very thin and very long, the sickle of the new moon. If +death be what it looks to the unthinking soul, and if the heavens +declare the glory of God, as they do indeed to the heart that knows +him, then is there discord between heaven and earth such as no +argument can harmonize. But death is not what men think it, for +"Blessed are they that mourn for the dead." + +The sight enhanced the wonder and hope of the two honest good souls in +the treasure they carried. Out of the bosom of the skeleton Death +himself, had been given them--into their very arms--a germ of life, a +jewel of heaven! At the thought of what lay up the hill behind them, +they felt their joy in the child almost wicked; but if God had taken +the child's father and mother, might they not be glad in the hope that +he had chosen them to replace them? That he had for the moment at +least, they were bound to believe! + +They travelled slowly on, through the dying sunset, and an hour or two +of the star-bright night that followed, adorned rather than lighted by +the quaint boat of the crescent moon. Weary, but lapt in a voiceless +triumph, they came at last, guided by the donkeys, to their hotel. + +All were talking of the earthquake. A great part of the English had +fled in a panic terror, like sheep that had no shepherd--hunted by +their own fears, and betrayed by their imagined faith. The steadiest +church-goer fled like the infidel he reviled. The fool said in his +heart, "There is no God," and fled. The Christian said with his mouth, +"Verily there is a God that ruleth in the earth!" and fled--far as he +could from the place which, as he fancied, had shown signs of a +special presence of the father of Jesus Christ. + +After the Persons were in the house, there came two or three small +shocks. Every time, out with a cry rushed the inhabitants into the +streets; every time, out into the garden of the hotel swarmed such as +were left in it of Germans and English. But our little couple, who had +that day seen so much more of its terrors than any one else in the +place, and whose chamber was at the top of the house where the swaying +was worst, were too much absorbed in watching and tending their lovely +boy to heed the earthquake. Perhaps their hearts whispered, "Can that +which has given us such a gift be unfriendly?" + +"If his father and mother," said Mrs. Person, as they stood regarding +him, "are permitted to see their child, they shall see how we love +him, and be willing he should love us!" + +As they went up the stairs with him, the boy woke When he looked and +saw a face that was not his mother's, a cloud swept across the heaven +of his eyes. He closed them again, and did not speak. The first of the +shocks came as they were putting him to bed: he turned very white and +looked up fixedly, as if waiting another fall from above, but sat +motionless on his new mother's lap. The instant the vibration and +rocking ceased, he drank from the cup of milk she offered him, as +quietly as if but a distant thunder had rolled away. When she put him +in the bed, he looked at her with such an indescribable expression of +bewildered loss, that she burst into tears. The child did not cry. He +had not cried since they took him. The woman's heart was like to break +for him, but she managed to say, + +"God has taken her, my darling. He is keeping her for you, and I am +going to keep you for her;" and with that she kissed him. + +The same moment came the second shock. + +Need wakes prophecy: the need of the child made of the parson a +prophet. + +"It is God that does the shaking," he said. "It's all right. Nobody +will be the worse--not much, at least!" + +"Not at all," rejoined the boy, and turned his face away. + +From the lips of such a tiny child, the words seemed almost awful. + +He fell fast asleep, and never woke till the morning. Mrs. Porson lay +beside him, yielding him, stout as she was, a good half of the little +Italian bed. She scarcely slept for excitement and fear of smothering +him. + +The Persons were honest people, and for all their desire to possess +the child, made no secret of how and where they had found him, or of +as much of his name as he could tell them, which was only _Clare_. But +they never heard of inquiry after him. On the gunboat at Genoa they +knew nothing of their commander's purposes, or where to seek him. Days +passed before they began to be uneasy about him, and when they did +make what search for him they could, it was fruitless. + + + +Chapter V. + +His new home. + + +The place to which the good people carried the gift of the +earthquake--carried him with much anxiety and more exultation--had no +very distinctive features. It had many fields in grass, many in crop, +and some lying fallow--all softly undulating. It had some trees, and +everywhere hedges dividing fields whose strange shapes witnessed to a +complicated history, of which few could tell anything. Here and there +in the hollows between the motionless earth-billows, flowed, but did +not seem to flow, what they called a brook. But the brooks there were +like deep soundless pools without beginning or end. There was no life, +no gaiety, no song in them, only a sullen consent to exist. That at +least is how they impress one accustomed to real brooks, lark-like, +always on the quiver, always on the move, always babbling and gabbling +and gamboling, always at their games, always tossing their pebbles +about, and telling them to talk. A man that loved them might say there +was more in the silence of these, than in the speech of those; but +what silence can be better than a song of delight that we are, that we +were, that we are to be! The stillness may be full of solemn fish, +mysterious as itself, and deaf with secrets; but blessed is the brook +that lets the light of its joy shine. + +Dull as the place must seem in this my description, it was the very +country for the boy. He would come into more contact with its modest +beauty in a day than some of us would in a year. Nobody quite knows +the beauty of a country, especially of a quiet country, except one who +has been born in it, or for whom at least childhood and boyhood and +youth have opened door after door into the hidden phases of its +life. There is no square yard on the face of the earth but some one +can in part understand what God meant in making it; while the same +changeful skies canopy the most picturesque and the dullest +landscapes; the same winds wake and blow over desert and pasture land, +making the bosoms of youth and age swell with the delight of their +blowing. The winds are not all so full as are some of delicious odours +gathered as they pass from gardens, fields, and hill-sides; but all +have their burden of sweetness. Those that blew upon little Clare were +oftener filled with the smell of farmyards, and burning weeds, and +cottage-fires, than of flowers; but never would one of such odours +revisit him without bringing fresh delight to his heart. Its mere +memorial suggestion far out on the great sea would wake the old child +in the man. The pollards along the brooks grew lovely to his heart, +and were not the less lovely when he came to understand that they were +not so lovely as God had meant them to be. He was one of those who, +regarding what a thing _is_, and not comparing it with other things, +descry the thought of God in it, and love it; for to love what is +beautiful is as natural as to love our mothers. + +The parsonage to which his new father and mother brought him was like +the landscape--humble. It was humble even for a parsonage--which has +no occasion to be fine. For men and women whose business it is to +teach their fellows to be true and fair, and not covet fine things, +are but hypocrites, or at best intruders and humbugs, if they want +fine things themselves. Jesus Christ did not care about fine +things. He loved every lovely thing that ever his father made. If any +one does not know the difference between fine things and lovely +things, he does not know much, if he has all the science in the world +at his finger-ends. + +One good thing about the parsonage was, that it was aid, and the +swallows had loved it for centuries. That way Clare learned to love +the swallows--and they are worth loving. Then it had a very old +garden, nearly as old-fashioned as it was old, and many flowers that +have almost ceased to be seen grew in it, and did not enjoy their +lives the less that they were out of fashion. All the furniture in the +house was old, and mostly shabby; it was possible, therefore, to love +it a little. Who on earth could be such a fool as to love a new piece +of furniture! One might prize it; one might admire it; one might like +it because it was pretty, or because it was comfortable; but only a +silly woman whose soul went to bed on her new sideboard, could say she +loved it. And then it would not be true. It is impossible that any but +an _old_ piece of furniture should be loved. + +His father and mother had a charming little room made for him in the +garret, right up among the swallows, who soon admitted him a member of +their society--an honorary member, that is, who was not expected to +fly with them to Africa except he liked. His new parents did this +because they saw that, when he could not be with them, he preferred +being by himself; and that moods came upon him in which he would steal +away even from them, seized with a longing for loneliness. In general, +next to being with his mother anywhere, he liked to be with his father +in the study. If both went out, and could not take him with them, he +would either go to his own room, or sit in the study alone. It was a +very untidy room, crowded with books, mostly old and dingy, and in +torn bindings. Many of them their owner never opened, and they +suffered in consequence; a few of them were constantly in his hands, +and suffered in consequence. All smelt strong of stale tobacco, but +that hardly accounts for the fact that Clare never took to smoking. +Another thing perhaps does--that he was always too much of a man to +want to look like a man by imitating men. That is unmanly. A boy who +wants to look like a man is not a manly boy, and men do not care for +his company. A true boy is always welcome to a true man, but a +would-be man is better on the other side of the wall. + +His mother oftenest sat in a tiny little drawing-room, which smelt of +withered rose-leaves. I think it must smell of them still. I believe +it smelt of them a hundred years before she saw the place. Clare loved +the smell of the rose-leaves and disliked the smell of the tobacco; +yet he preferred the study with its dingy books to the pretty +drawing-room without his mother. + +There was a village, a very small one, in the parish, and a good many +farm-houses. + +Such was the place in which Clare spent the next few years of his +life, and there his new parents loved him heartily. The only thing +about him that troubled them, besides the possibility of losing him, +was, that they could not draw out the tiniest smile upon his sweet, +moonlight-face. + + + +Chapter VI. + +What did draw out his first smile. + + +Mr. Porson was a man about five and forty; his wife was a few years +younger. His theories of religion were neither large nor lofty; he +accepted those that were handed down to him, and did not trouble +himself as to whether they were correct. He did what was better: he +tried constantly to obey the law of God, whether he found it in the +Bible or in his own heart. Thus he was greater in the kingdom of +heaven than thousands that knew more, had better theories about God, +and could talk much more fluently concerning religion than he. By +obeying God he let God teach him. So his heart was always growing; and +where the heart grows, there is no fear of the intellect; there it +also grows, and in the best fashion of growth. He was very good to his +people, and not foolishly kind. He tried his best to help them to be +what they ought to be, to make them bear their troubles, be true to +one another, and govern themselves. He was like a father to them. For +some, of course, he could do but little, because they were locked +boxes with nothing in them; but for a few he did much. Perhaps it was +because he was so good to his flock that God gave him little Clare to +bring up. Perhaps it was because he and his wife were so good to +Clare, that by and by a wonderful thing took place. + +About three years after the earthquake, Mrs. Porson had a baby-girl +sent her for her very own. The father and mother thought themselves +the happiest couple on the face of the earth--and who knows but they +were! If they were not, so much the better! for then, happy as they +were, there were happier yet than they; and who, in his greatest +happiness, would not be happier still to know that the earth held +happier than he! + +When Clare first saw the baby, he looked down on her with solemn, +unmoved countenance, and gazed changeless for a whole minute. He +thought there had been another earthquake, that another church-dome +had fallen, and another child been found and brought home from the +ruin. Then light began to grow somewhere under his face. His mother, +full as was her heart of her new child, watched his countenance +anxiously. The light under his face grew and grew, till his face was +radiant. Then out of the midst of the shining broke the heavenliest +smile she had ever seen on human countenance--a smile that was a +clearer revelation of God than ten thousand books about him. For what +must not that God be, who had made the boy that smiled such a smile +and never knew it! After this he smiled occasionally, though it was +but seldom. He never laughed--that is, not until years after this +time; but, on the other hand, he never looked sullen. A quiet peace, +like the stillness of a long summer twilight in the north, dwelt upon +his visage, and appeared to model his every motion. Part of his life +seemed away, and he waiting for it to come back. Then he would be +merry! + +He was never in a hurry, yet always doing something--always, that is, +when he was not in his own room. There his mother would sometimes find +him sitting absolutely still, with his hands on his knees. Nor was she +sorry to surprise him thus, for then she was sure of one of his rare +smiles. She thought he must then be dreaming of his own mother, and a +pang would go through her at the thought that he would one day love +her more than herself. "He will laugh then!" she said. She did not +think how the gratitude of that mother would one day overwhelm her +with gladness. + +He never sought to be caressed, but always snuggled to one that drew +him close. Never once did he push any one away. He learned what +lessons were set him--not very fast, but with persistent endeavour to +understand. He was greatly given to reading, but not particularly +quick. He thus escaped much, fancying that he knew when he did not +know--a quicksand into which fall so many clever boys and girls. Give +me a slow, steady boy, who knows when he does not know a thing! To +know that you do not know, is to be a small prophet. Such a boy has a +glimmer of the something he does not know, or at least of the place +where it is; while the boy who easily grasps the words that stand for +a thing, is apt to think he knows the thing itself when he sees but +the wrapper of it--thinks he knows the church when he has caught sight +of the weather-cock. Mrs. Porson could see the understanding of a +thing gradually burst into blossom on the boy's face. It did not +smile, it only shone. Understanding is light; it needs love to change +light into a smile. + +There was something in the boy that his parents hardly hoped to +understand; something in his face that made them long to know what was +going on in him, but made them doubt if ever in this life they +should. He was not concealing anything from them. He did not know that +he had anything to tell, or that they wanted to know anything. He +never doubted that everybody saw him just as he felt himself; his soul +seemed bare to all the world. But he knew little of what was passing +in him: child or man never knows more than a small part of that. + +When first he was allowed to take the little one in his arms, he +sitting on a stool at his mother's feet, it was almost a new start in +his existence. A new confidence was born in his spirit. Mrs. Person +could read, as if reflected in his countenance, the pride and +tenderness that composed so much of her own conscious motherhood. A +certain staidness, almost sternness, took possession of his face as he +bent over the helpless creature, half on his knees, half in his +arms--the sternness of a protecting divinity that knew danger not +afar. He had taken a step upward in being; he was aware in himself, +without knowing it, of the dignity of fatherhood. Even now he knew +what so many seem never to learn, that a man is the defender of the +weak; that, if a man is his brother's keeper, still more is he his +sister's. She belonged to him, therefore he was hers in the slavery of +love, which alone is freedom. So reverential and so careful did he +show himself, that soon his mother trusted him, to the extent of his +power, more than any nurse. + +By and by she made the delightful discovery that, when he was alone +with the baby, the silent boy could talk. Where was no need or hope of +being understood, his words began to flow--with a rhythmical cadence +that seemed ever on the verge of verse. When first his mother heard +the sweet murmur of his voice, she listened; and then first she +learned what a hold the terrible thing that had given him into her +arms had upon him. For she heard him half singing, half saying-- + +"Baby, baby, do not grow. Keep small, and lie on my lap, and dream of +walking, but never walk; for when you walk you will run, and when you +run you will go away with father and mother--away to a big place where +the ground goes up to the sky; and you will go up the ground that goes +up to the sky, and you will come to a big church, and you will go into +the church; and the ground and the church and the sky will go _hurr, +hurr, hurr_; and the sky, full of angels, will come down with a great +roar; and all the yards and sails will drop out of the sky, and tumble +down father and mother, and hold them down that they cannot get up +again; and then you will have nobody but me. I will do all I can, but +I am only brother Clare, and you will want, want, want mother and +father, mother and father, and they will be always coming, and never +be come, not for ever so long! Don't grow a big girl, Maly!" + +The mother could not think what to say. She went in, and, in the hope +of turning his thoughts aside, took the baby, and made haste to +consult her husband. + +"We must leave it," said Mr. Person. "Experience will soon correct +what mistake is in his notion. It is not so very far wrong. You and I +must go from them one day: what is it but that the sky will fall down +on us, and our bodies will get up no more! He thinks the time nearer +at hand than for their sakes I hope it is; but nobody can tell." + +Clare never associated the church where the awful thing took place, +with the church to which he went on Sundays. The time for it, he +imagined, came to everybody. To Clare, nothing ever _happened_. The +way out of the world was a church in a city set on a hill, and there +an earthquake was always ready. + +The heart of his adoptive mother grew yet more tender toward him after +the coming of her own child. She was not quite sure that she did not +love him even more than Mary. She could not help the feeling that he +was a child of heaven sent out to nurse on the earth; and that it was +in reward for her care of him that her own darling was sent her. That +their love to the boy had something to do with the coming of the girl, +I believe myself, though what that something was, I do not precisely +understand. + +She left him less often alone with the child. She would not have his +thoughts drawn to the church of the earthquake; neither would she have +the mournfulness of his sweet voice much in the ears of her baby. He +never sang in a minor key when any one was by, but always and solely +when the baby and he were alone together. + + + +Chapter VII. + +Clare and his brothers. + + +After a year or two, Mr. Person became anxious lest the boy should +grow up too unlike other boys--lest he should not be manly, but of a +too gently sad behaviour. He began, therefore, to take him with him +about the parish, and was delighted to find him show extraordinary +endurance. He would walk many miles, and come home less fatigued than +his companion. To be sure, he had not much weight to carry; but it +seemed to Mr. Porson that his utter freedom from thought about himself +had a large share in his immunity from weariness. He continued slight +and thin--which was natural, for he was growing fast; but the muscles +of his little bird-like legs seemed of steel. The spindle-shanks went +striding, striding without a check, along the roughest roads, the pale +face shining atop of them like a sweet calm moon. To Mr. Person's +eyes, the moon, stooping, as she sometimes seems to do, downward from +the sky, always looked like him. The child woke something new in the +heart and mind of every one that loved him, but was himself +unconscious of his influence. His company was no check to his father +when meditating, after his habit as he walked, what he should say to +his people the next Sunday. For the good man never wrote or read a +sermon, but talked to his people as one who would meet what was in +them with what was in him. Hence they always believed "the parson +meant it." He never said anything clever, and never said anything +unwise; never amused them, and never made them feel scornful, either +of him or of any one else. + +Instead of finding the presence of Clare distract his thoughts, he had +at times a curious sense that the boy was teaching him--that his +sermon was running before, or walking sedately on this side of him or +that. For Clare could run like the wind; and did run after +butterflies, dragon-flies, or anything that offered a chance of seeing +it nearer; but he never killed, and seldom tried to catch anything, if +but for a moment's examination. The swiftest run would scarcely +heighten the colour of his pale cheeks. + +He soon came to be known in the farm-houses of the parish. The +farmer-families were a little shy of him at first, fancying him too +fine a little gentleman for them; but as they got to know him, they +grew fond of him. They called him "the parson's man," which pleased +Clare. But one old woman called him "the parson's cherubim." + +One day Mr. Porson was calling at the house of the largest farm in the +parish, the nearest house to the parsonage. The farmer's wife was ill, +and having to go to her room to see her, he said to the boy-- + +"Clare, you run into the yard. Give my compliments to any one you +meet, and ask him to let you stay with him." + +When the time came for their departure, Mr. Porson went to find +him. He did not call him; he wanted to see what he was about. Unable +to discover him, and coming upon no one of whom he might inquire, for +it was hay-time and everybody in the fields, he was at last driven to +use his voice. + +He had not to call twice. Out of the covered part of the pigsty, not +far from which the parson stood, the boy came creeping on all fours, +followed by a litter of half-grown, grunting, gamboling pigs. + +"Here I am, papa!" he cried. + +"Clare," exclaimed his father, "what a mess you have made of +yourself!" + +"I gave them your compliments," answered the boy, as he scrambled over +the fence with his father's assistance, "and asked them if I might +stay with them till you were ready. They said yes, and invited me +in. I went in; and we've been having such games! They were very kind +to me." + +His father turned involuntarily and looked into the sty. There stood +all the pigs in a row, gazing after the boy, and looking as sorry as +their thick skins and bony snouts would let them. Their mother rose in +a ridge behind them, gazing too. Mr. Skymer always spoke of pigs as +about the most intelligent animals in the world. + +I do not know when or where or how his love of the animals began, for +he could not tell me. If it began with the pigs, it was far from +ending with them. + +The next day he asked his father if he might go and call upon the +pigs. + +"Have you forgotten, Clare," said his mother, "what a job Susan and I +had with your clothes? I wonder still how you could have done such a +thing! They were quite filthy. When I saw you, I had half a mind to +put you in a bath, clothes and all. I doubt if they are sweet yet!" + +"Oh, yes, they are, indeed, mamma!" returned Clare; "and you know I +shall be careful after this! I shall not go into their house, but get +the farmer to let them out. I've thought of a new game with them!" + +His mother consented; the farmer did let the pigs out; and Clare and +they had a right good game together among the ricks in the yard. + +His growing nature showed itself in a swiftly widening friendship for +live things. The spreading ripples of his affection took in the cows +and the horses, the hens and the geese, and every creature about the +place, till at length it had to pull up at the moles, because he could +not get at them. I doubt if he would have liked them if he had seen +one eat a frog! He called the pigs little brothers, and the horses and +cows big brothers, and was perfectly at home with them before people +knew he cared for their company. I think his absolute simplicity +brought him near to the fountain of life, or rather, prevented him +from straying from it; and this kept him so alive himself, that he was +delicately sensitive to all life. He felt himself pledged to all other +life as being one with it. Its forms were therefore so open to him as +to seem familiar from the first. He knew instinctively what went on in +regions of life differing from his own--knew, without knowing how, +what the animals were thinking and feeling; so was able to interpret +their motions, even the sudden changes in their behaviour. + +There was one dangerous animal on the place--a bull, of which the +farmer had often said he must part with him, or he would be the death +of somebody. One morning he was struck with terror to find Clare in +the stall with Nimrod. The brute was chained up pretty short, but was +free enough for terrible mischief: Clare was stroking his nose, and +the beast was standing as still as a bull of bronze, with one curved +and one sharp, forward-set, wicked-looking horn in alarming proximity +to the angelic face. The farmer stood in dismay, still as the bull, +afraid to move. Clare looked up and smiled, but his delicate little +hand went on caressing the huge head. It was one of God's small high +creatures visiting with good news of hope one of his big low +creatures--a little brother of Jesus Christ bringing a taste of his +father's kingdom to his great dull bull of a brother. The farmer +called him. The boy came at once. Mr. Goodenough told him he must not +go near the bull; he was fierce and dangerous. Clare informed him that +he and the bull had been friends for a long time; and to prove it ran +back, and before the farmer could lay hold of him, was perched on the +animal's shoulders. The bull went on eating the grass in the manger +before him, and took as little heed of the boy as if it were but a fly +that had lighted on him, and neither tickled nor stung him. + +By degrees he grew familiar with all the goings on at the farm, and +drew nearer to a true relation with the earth that nourishes +all. Where the soil was not too heavy, the ploughman would set him on +the back of the near horse, and there he would ride in triumph to the +music of the ploughman's whistle behind. His was not the pomp of the +destroyer who rides trampling, but the pomp of the saviour drawing +forth life from the earth. In the summer the hayfield knew him, and in +the autumn the harvest-field, where busily he gathered what the earth +gave, and for himself strength, a sense of wide life and large +relations. The very mould, not to say the grass-blades and the +daisies, was dear to him. He was more sympathetic with the daisies +ploughed down than was even Burns, for he had a strong feeling that +they went somewhere, and were the better for going; that this was the +way their sky fell upon them. + +All the people on the farm, all the people of the village, every one +in the parish knew the boy and his story. From his gentleness and +lovingkindness to live things, there were who said he was half-witted; +others said he saw ghosts. The boys of the village despised, and some +hated him, because he was so unlike them. They called him a girl +because where they tormented he caressed. At this he would smile, and +they durst not lay hands on him. + +The days are long in boyhood, and Clare could do a many things in +one. There was the morning, the forenoon, and the long afternoon and +evening! He could help on the farm; he could play with ever so many +animals; he could learn his lessons, which happily were not heavy; he +could read any book he pleased in his father's library, where +_Paradise Lost_ was his favourite; he could nurse little Maly. He had +the more time for all these that he had no companion of his own age, +no one he wanted to go about with after school-hours. His father was +still his chief human companion, and neither of them grew tired of the +other. + +The most remarkable thing in the child was the calm and gentle +greatness of his heart. You often find children very fond of one or +two people, who, perhaps, in evil return, want to keep them all to +themselves, and reproach them for loving others. Many persons count it +a sign of depth in a child that he loves only one or two. I doubt it +greatly. I think that only the child who loves all life can love right +well, can love deeply and strongly and tenderly the lives that come +nearest him. Low nurses and small-hearted mothers dwarf and pervert +their children, doing their worst to keep them from having big hearts +like God. Clare had other teaching than this. He had lost his father +and mother, but many were given him to love; and so he was helped to +wait patiently till he found them again. God was keeping them for him +somewhere, and keeping him for them here. + +The good for which we are born into this world is, that we may learn +to love. I think Clare the most enviable of boys, because he loved +more than any one of his age I have heard of. There are people--oh, +such silly people they are!--though they may sometimes be +pleasing--who are always wanting people to love them. They think so +much of themselves, that they want to think more; and to know that +people love them makes them able to think more of themselves. They +even think themselves loving because they are fond of being loved! +You might as soon say because a man loves money he is generous; +because he loves to gather, therefore he knows how to scatter; because +he likes to read a story, therefore he can write one. Such lovers are +only selfish in a deeper way, and are more to blame than other selfish +people; for, loving to be loved, they ought the better to know what an +evil thing it is not to love; what a mean thing to accept what they +are not willing to give. Even to love only those that love us, is, as +the Lord has taught us, but a pinched and sneaking way of +loving. Clare never thought about being loved. He was too busy loving, +with so many about him to love, to think of himself. He was not the +contemptible little wretch to say, "What a fine boy I am, to make +everybody love me!" If he had been capable of that, not many would +have loved him; and those that did would most of them have got tired +of loving a thing that did not love again. Only great lovers like God +are able to do that, and they help God to make love grow. But there is +little truth in love where there is no wisdom in it. Clare's father +and mother were wise, and did what they could to make Clare wise. + +Also the animals, though they were not aware of it, did much to save +him from being spoiled by the humans whom the boy loved more than +them. For Clare's charity began at home. Those who love their own +people will love other people. Those who do not love children will +never love animals right. + +Here I will set down a strange thing that befell Clare, and caused him +a sore heart, making him feel like a traitor to the whole animal race, +and influencing his life for ever. I was at first puzzled to account +for the thing without attributing more imagination to the animals--or +some of them--than I had been prepared to do; but probably the main +factor in it was heart-disease. + +He had seen men go out shooting, but had never accompanied any +killers. I do not quite understand how, as in my story, he came even +to imitate using a gun. There was nothing in him that belonged to +killing; and that is more than I could say for myself, or any other +man I know except Clare Skymer. + +He was at the bottom of the garden one afternoon, where nothing but a +low hedge came between him and a field of long grass. He had in his +hand the stick of a worn-out umbrella. Suddenly a half-grown rabbit +rose in the grass before him, and bolted. From sheer unconscious +imitation, I believe, he raised the stick to his shoulder, and said +_Bang_. The rabbit gave a great bound into the air, fell, and lay +motionless. With far other feelings than those of a sportsman, Clare +ran, got through the hedge, and approached the rabbit trembling. He +could think nothing but that the creature was playing him a trick. Yet +he was frightened. Only how could he have hurt him! + +"I dare say the little one knows me," he said to himself, "and wanted +to give me a start! He couldn't tell what a start it would be, or he +wouldn't have done it." + +When he drew near, however, "the little one" did not, as he had hoped +and expected, jump up and run again. With sinking heart Clare went +close up, and looked down on it. It lay stretched out, motionless. +With death in his own bosom he stooped and tenderly lifted it. The +rabbit was stone-dead! The poor boy gazed at it, pressed it tenderly +to his heart, and went with it to find his mother. The tears kept +pouring down his face, but he uttered no cry till he came to her. Then +a low groaning howl burst from him; he laid the dead thing in her lap, +and threw himself on the floor at her feet in an abandonment of +self-accusation and despair. + +It was long before he was able to give her an intelligible account of +what had taken place. She asked him if he had found it dead. In answer +he could only shake his head, but that head-shake had a whole tragedy +in it. Then she examined "the little one," but could find no mark of +any wound upon it. When at length she learned how the case was, she +tried to comfort him, insisting he was not to blame, for he did not +mean to kill the little one. He would not hearken to her loving +sophistry. + +"No, mother!" he said through his sobs; "I wouldn't have blamed +myself, though I should have been very sorry, if I had killed him by +accident--if I had stepped upon him, or anything of that kind; but I +meant to frighten him! I looked bad at him! I made him think I was an +enemy, and going to kill him! I shammed bad--and so was real bad." + +He stopped with a most wailful howl. + +"Perhaps he knew me," he resumed, "and couldn't understand it. It was +much worse than if I had shot him. He wouldn't have known then till he +was dead. But to die of terror was horrible. Oh, why didn't I think +what I was doing?" + +"Nobody could have thought of such a thing happening." + +"No; but I ought to have thought, mother, of what I was doing. I was +trying to frighten him! I must have been in a cruel mood. Why didn't I +think love to the little one when I saw him, instead of thinking death +to him? I shall never look a rabbit in the face again! My heart must +have grown black, mother!" + +"I don't believe there is another rabbit in England would die from +such a cause," persisted his mother thoughtfully. + +"Then what a superior rabbit he must have been!" said Clare. "To think +that I pulled down the roof of his church upon him!" + +He burst into a torrent of tears, and ran to his own room. There his +mother thought it better to leave him undisturbed. She wisely judged +that a mind of such sensibility was alone capable of finding the +comfort to fit its need. + +Such comfort he doubtless did find, for by the time his mother called +him to tea, calmness had taken the place of the agony on his +countenance. His mother asked him no questions, for she as well as her +husband feared any possible encouragement to self-consciousness. I +imagine the boy had reflected that things could not go so wrong that +nobody could set them right. I imagine he thought that, if he had done +the rabbit a wrong, as he never for a moment to the end of his life +doubted he had, he who is at the head of all heads and the heart of +all hearts, would contrive to let him tell the rabbit he was sorry, +and would give him something to do for the rabbit that would make up +for his cruelty to him. He did once say to his mother, and neither of +them again alluded to the matter, that he was sure the rabbit had +forgiven him. + +"Little ones are _so_ forgiving, you know, mother!" he added. + +Is it any wonder that my friend Clare Skymer should have been no +sportsman? + + + +Chapter VIII. + +Clare and his human brothers + + +Another anecdote of him, that has no furtherance of the story in it, I +must yet tell. + +One cold day in a stormy March, the wind was wildly blowing broken +clouds across the heavens, and now rain, now sleet, over the shivering +blades of the young corn, whose tender green was just tinging the dark +brown earth. The fields were now dark and wintry, heartless and cold; +now shining all over as with repentant tears; one moment refusing to +be comforted, and the next reviving with hope and a sense of new +life. Clare was hovering about the plough. Suddenly he spied, from a +mound in the field, a little procession passing along the +highway. Those in front carried something on their shoulders which +must be heavy, for it took six of them to carry it. He knew it was a +coffin, for his home was by the churchyard, and a funeral was no +unfamiliar sight. Behind it one man walked alone. For a moment Clare +watched him, and saw his bowed head and heavy pace. His heart filled +from its own perennial fount of pity, which was God himself in him. He +ran down the hill and across the next field, making for a spot some +distance ahead of the procession. As it passed him, he joined the +chief mourner, who went plodding on with his arms hanging by his +sides. Creeping close up to him, he slid his little soft hand into the +great horny hand of the peasant. Instinctively the big hand closed +upon the small one, and the weather-beaten face of a man of fifty +looked down on the boy. Not a word was said between them. They walked +on, hand in hand. + +Neither had ever seen the other. The man was following his wife and +his one child to the grave. "Nothing almost sees miracles but misery," +says Kent in _King Lear_. Because this man was miserable, he saw a +miracle where was no miracle, only something very good. The thing was +true and precious, yea, a message from heaven. Those deep, upturned, +silent eyes; the profound, divine sympathy that shone in them; the +grasp of the tiny hand upon his large fingers, made the heart of the +man, who happened to be a catholic, imagine, and for a few moments +believe, that he held the hand of the infant Saviour. The cloud lifted +from his heart and brain, and did not return when he came to +understand that this was not _the_ lamb of God, only another lamb from +the same fold. + +When they had walked about two miles, the boy began to fear he might +be intruding, and would have taken his hand from the other, but the +man held it tight, and stooping whispered it was not far now. The +child, who, without knowing it, had taken the man under the +protection of his love, yielded at once, went with him to the grave, +joined in the service, and saw the grave filled. They went again as +they had come. Not a word was spoken. The man wept a little now and +then, drew the back of his brown hand across his eyes, and pressed a +little closer the hand he held. At the gate of the parsonage the boy +took his leave. He said they would be wondering what had become of +him, or he would have gone farther. The man released him without a +word. + +His mother had been uneasy about him, but when he told her how it was, +she said he had done right. + +"Yes," returned the boy; "I belong there myself." + +The mother knew he was not thinking of the grave. + +One more anecdote I will give, serving to introduce the narrative of +the following chapter, and helping to show the character of the +boy. He was so unlike most boys, that one must know all he may about +him, if he would understand him. + +Never yet, strange as the assertion must seem, had the boy shown any +anger. His father was a little troubled at the fact, fearing such +absence of resentment might indicate moral indifference, or, if not, +might yet render him incapable of coping with the world. He had +himself been brought up at a public school, and had not, with all his +experience of life, come to see, any more than most of the readers of +this story now see, or for a long time will see, that there lies no +nobility, no dignity in evil retort of any kind; that evil is evil +when returned as much as when given; that the only shining thing is +good--and the most shining, good for evil. + +One day a coarse boy in the village gave him a sharp blow on the +face. It forced water from his eyes and blood from his nose. He was +wiping away both at once with his handkerchief, when a kindly girl +stopped and said to him-- + +"Never mind; don't cry." + +"Oh, no!" answered Clare; "it's only water, it's not crying. It would +be cowardly to cry." + +"That's a brave boy! You'll give it him back one of these days." + +"No," he returned, "I shall not I couldn't." + +"Why?" + +"Because it hurts so. My nose feels as if it were broken. I know it's +not broken, but it feels like it." + +The girl, as well as the boys who stood around him, burst into +laughter. They saw no logic in his reasoning. Clare's was the divine +reasoning that comes of loving your neighbour; theirs was the earthly +reasoning that came of loving themselves. They did not see that to +Clare another boy was another of himself; that he was carrying out the +design of the Father of men, that his creatures should come together +into one, not push each other away. + +The next time he met the boy who struck him, so far was he both from +resentment and from the fear of being misunderstood, that he offered +him a rosy-cheeked apple his mother had given him as he left for +school. The boy was tyrant and sneak together--a combination to be +seen sometimes in a working man set over his fellows, and in a rich +man grown poor, and bent upon making money again. The boy took the +apple, never doubted Clare gave it him to curry favour, ate it up +grinning, and threw the core in his face. Clare turned away with a +sigh, and betook himself to his handkerchief again, The boy burst into +a guffaw of hideous laughter. + + + +Chapter IX. + +Clare the defender. + + +This enemy was a trouble, more or less, to every decent person in the +neighbourhood. It was well his mother was a widow, for where she was +only powerless to restrain, the father would have encouraged. He was a +big, idle, sneering, insolent lad--such that had there been two more +of the sort, they would have made the village uninhabitable. It was +all the peaceable vicar could do to keep his hands off him. + +One day, little Mary being then about five years old, Clare had her +out for a walk. They were alone in a narrow lane, not far from the +farm where Clare was so much at home. To his consternation, for he had +his sister in charge, down the lane, meeting them, came the village +tyrant. He strolled up with his hands in his pockets, and barred their +way. But while, his eye chiefly on Clare, he "straddled" like +Apollyon, but not "quite over the whole breadth of the way," Mary +slipped past him. The young brute darted after the child. Clare put +down his head, as he had seen the rams do, and as Simpson, who ill +deserved the name of the generous Jewish Hercules, was on the point of +laying hold of her, caught him in the flank, butted him into the +ditch, and fell on the top of him. + +"Run, Maly!" he cried; "I'll be after you in a moment." + +"Will you, you little devil!" cried the bully; and taking him by the +throat, so that he could not utter even a gurgle, got up and began to +beat him unmercifully. But the sounds of their conflict had reached +the ears of the bull Nimrod, who was feeding within the hedge. He +recognized Clare's voice, perhaps knew from it that he was in trouble; +but I am inclined to think pure bull-love of a row would alone have +sent him tearing to the quarter whence the tyrant's brutal bellowing +still came. There, looking over the hedge, he saw his friend in the +clutches of an enemy of his own, for Simpson never lost a chance of +teasing Nimrod when he could do so with safety. Over he came with a +short roar and a crash. Looking up, the bully saw a bigger bully than +himself, with his head down and horns level, retreating a step or two +in preparation for running at him. Simpson shoved the helpless Clare +toward the enemy and fled. Clare fell. Nimrod jumped over his +prostrate friend and tore after Simpson. Clare got up and would at +once have followed to protect his enemy, but that he must first see +his sister safe. He ran with her to a cottage hard by, handed her to +the woman at the door of it, and turning pursued Simpson and the bull. + +Nimrod overtook his enemy in the act of scrambling over a five-barred +gate. Simpson saw the head of the bull coming down upon him like the +bows of a Dutchman upon a fishing-boat, and, paralyzed with terror, +could not move an inch further. Crash against the gate came the horns +of Nimrod, with all the weight and speed of his body behind them. Away +went the gate into the field, and away went Simpson and the bull with +it, the latter nearly breaking his neck, for his horns were entangled +in the bars, one of them by the diagonal bar. Simpson's right leg was +jammed betwixt the gate and the head and horns of the bull. He roared, +and his roars maddened Nimrod, furious already that he could not get +his horns clear. Shake and pull as he might, the gate stuck to them; +and Simpson fared little the better that the bull's quarrel was for +the moment with the gate, and not with the leg between him and it. + +Clare had not seen the catastrophe, and did not know what had become +of pursuer or pursued, until he reached the gap where the gate had +been. He saw then the odd struggle going on, and ran to the aid of his +foe, in terror of what might already have befallen him. The moment he +laid hold of one of the animal's horns, infuriated as Nimrod was with +his helpless entanglement, he knew at once who it was, and was quiet; +for Clare always took him by the horn when first he went up to +him. Without a moment's demur he yielded to the small hands as they +pushed and pulled his head this way and that until they got it clear +of the gate. But then they did not let him go. Clare proceeded to take +him home, and Nimrod made no objection. Simpson lay groaning. + +When Clare returned, his enemy was there still. He had got clear of +the gate, but seemed in much pain, for he lay tearing up the grass and +sod in handfuls. When Clare stooped to ask what he should do for him, +he struck him a backhanded blow on the face that knocked him +over. Clare got up and ran. + +"Coward!" cried Simpson; "to leave a man with a broken leg to get home +by himself!" + +"I'm going to find some one strong enough to help you," said Clare. + +But Simpson, after his own evil nature, imagined he was going to let +the bull into the field again, and fell to praying him not to leave +him. Clare knew, however, that, if his leg was broken, he could not +get him home, neither could he get home by himself; so he made haste +to tell the people at the farm, and Simpson lay in terror of the bull +till help came. + +From that hour he hated Clare, attributing to him all the ill he had +brought on himself. But he was out of mischief for a while. The +trouble fell on his mother--who deserved it, for she would believe no +ill of him, because he was _hers_. One good thing of the affair was, +that the bully was crippled for life, and could do the less harm. + +It was a great joy to Mr. Person to learn how Clare had defended his +sister. Clergyman as he was, and knowing that Jesus Christ would never +have returned a blow, and that this spirit of the Lord was what saved +the world, he had been uneasy that his adopted child behaved just like +Jesus. That a man should be so made as not to care to return a blow, +never occurred to Mr. Porson as possible. It was therefore an +immeasurable relief to his feelings as an Englishman, to find that the +boy was so far from being destitute of pluck, that in defence of his +sister he had attacked a fellow twice his size. + +"Weren't you afraid of such a big rascal?" he said. + +"No, papa," answered the boy. "Ought I to have been?" + +He put his hand to his forehead, as if trying to understand. His +father found he had himself something to think about. + +There was a certain quiescence about Clare, ill to describe, +impossible to explain, but not the less manifest. Like an infant, he +never showed surprise at anything. Whatever came to him he received, +questioning nothing, marvelling at nothing, disputing nothing. What he +was told to do he went to do, never with even a momentary show of +disinclination, leaving book or game with readiness but no +eagerness. He would do deftly what was required of him, and return to +his place, with a countenance calm and sweet as the moon in highest +heaven. He seldom offered a caress except to little Mary; yet would +choose, before anything else, a place by his mother's knee. The moment +she, or his father in her absence, entered the room and sat down, he +would rise, take his stool, and set it as near as he thought he +might. When caressed he never turned away, or looked as if he would +rather be let alone; at the same time he received the caress so +quietly, and with so little response, that often, when his heavenly +look had drawn the heart of some mother, or spinster with motherly +heart, he left an ache in the spirit he would have gone to the world's +end to comfort. He never sought love--otherwise than by getting near +the loved. When anything was given him, he would look up and smile, +but he seldom showed much pleasure, or went beyond the regulation +thanks. But if at such a moment little Mary were by, he had a curious +way of catching her up and presenting her to the giver. Whether this +was a shape his thanks took, whether Mary was to him an incorporate +gratitude, or whether he meant to imply that she was the fitter on +whom to shower favour, it were hard to say. His mother observed, and +in her mind put the two things together, that he did not seem to prize +much any mere possession. He looked pleased with a new suit of +clothes, but if any one remarked on his care of them, he would answer, +"I mustn't spoil what's papa and mamma's!" He made no hoard of any +kind. He did once hoard marbles till he had about a hundred; then it +was discovered that they were for a certain boy in the village who was +counted half-witted--as indeed was Clare himself by many. When he +learned that the boy had first been accused of stealing them--for no +one would believe that another boy had given them to him--and after +that robbed of them by the other boys, on the ground that he did not +know how to play with them, Clare saw that it was as foolish to hoard +for another as for himself. + +He was a favourite with few beyond those that knew him well. Many who +saw him only at church, or about the village, did not take to him. His +still regard repelled them. In Naples they would have said he had the +evil eye. I think people had a vague sense of rebuke in his +presence. Even his mother, passionately loving her foundling, was +aware of a film between them through which she could not quite see +him, beyond which there was something she could not get at, Clare knew +nothing of such a separation. He seemed to himself altogether close to +his mother, was aware of nothing between to part them. The cause of +the thing was, that Clare was not yet in flower. His soul was a white +half-blown bud, not knowing that it was but half-blown. It basked in +the glory of the warm sun, but only with the underside of its +flower-leaves; it had not opened its heart, the sun-side of its +petals, to the love in which it was immerged. He received the love as +a matter of course, and loved it as a matter of course. But for the +cruel Simpson he would not have known there could be any other way of +things. He did not yet know that one must not only love but mean to +love, must not only bask in the warmth of love, but know it as love, +and where it comes from--love again the fountain whence it flows. + + + +Chapter X. + +The black aunt. + + +Clare was yet in his tenth year when an unhealthy summer came. The sun +was bright and warm as in other summers, and the flowers in field and +garden appeared as usual when the hour arrived for them to wake and +look abroad; but the children of men did not fare so well as the +children of the earth. A peculiar form of fever showed itself in the +village. It was not very fatal, yet many were so affected as to be +long unable to work. There was consequently much distress beyond the +suffering of the fever itself. The parson and his wife went about from +morning to night among the cottagers, helping everybody that needed +help. They had no private fortune, but the small blanket of the +benefice they spread freely over as many as it could be stretched to +cover, depriving themselves of a good part of the food to which they +had been accustomed, and of several degrees of necessary warmth. When +at last the strength of the parson gave way, and the fever laid hold +of him, he had to do without many comforts his wife would gladly have +got for him. They were both of rather humble origin, having but one +relative well-to-do, a sister of Mrs. Porson, who had married a rich +but very common man. From her they could not ask help. She had never +sent them any little present, and had been fiercely indignant with +them for adopting Clare. + +Neither of them once complained, though Mrs. Person, whose strength +was much spent, could not help weeping sometimes when she was alone +and free to weep. They knew their Lord did not live in luxury, and a +secret gladness nestled in their hearts that they were allowed to +suffer a little with him for the sake of the flock he had given into +their charge. + +The children of course had to share in the general gloom, but it did +not trouble them much. For Clare, he was not easily troubled with +anything. Always ready to help, he did not much realize what suffering +was; and he had Mary to look after, which was labour and pleasure, +work and play and pay all in one. His mother was at ease concerning +her child when she knew her in Clare's charge, and was free to attend +to her husband. She often said that if ever any were paid for being +good to themselves, she and her husband were vastly overpaid for +taking such a child from the shuddering arms of the earthquake. + +But John Porson's hour was come. He must leave wife and children and +parish, and go to him who had sent him. If any one think it hard he +should so fare in doing his duty, let him be silent till he learn what +the parson himself thought of the matter when he got home. People talk +about death as the gosling might about life before it chips its +egg. Take up their way of lamentation, and we shall find it an +endless injustice to have to get up every morning and go to bed every +night. Mrs. Porson wept, but never thought him or herself +ill-used. And had she been low enough to indulge in self-pity, it +would have been thrown away, for before she had time to wonder how she +was to live and rear her children, she too was sent for. In this world +she was not one of those mothers of little faith who trust God for +themselves but not for their children, and when again with her +husband, she would not trust God less. + +Clare was in the garden when Sarah told him she was dead. He stood +still for a moment, then looked up, up into the blue. Why he looked +up, he could not have told; but ever since that terrible morning of +which the vague burning memory had never passed, when the great dome +into which he was gazing, burst and fell, he had a way every now and +then of standing still and looking up. His face was white. Two slow +tears gathered, rolled over, and dried upon his face. He turned to +Mary, lifted her in his arms, and, carrying her about the garden, once +more told her his strange version of what had happened in his +childhood. Then he told her that her papa and mamma had gone to look +for his papa and mamma--"somewhere up in the dome," he said. + +When they wanted to take Mary to see what was left of her mother, the +boy contrived to prevent them. From morning till night he never lost +sight of the child. + +One cold noon in October, when the clouds were miles deep in front of +the sun, when the rain was falling thick on the yellow leaves, and all +the paths were miry, the two children sat by the kitchen fire. Sarah +was cooking their mid-day meal, which had come from her own +pocket. She was the only servant either of them had known in the +house, and she would not leave it until some one should take charge of +them. The neighbours, dreading infection, did not come near +them. Clare sat on a little stool with Mary on his knees, nestling in +his bosom; but he felt dreary, for he saw no love-firmament over him; +the cloud of death hid it. + +With a sudden jingle and rattle, up drove a rickety post-chaise to the +door of the parsonage. Out of it, and into the kitchen, came stalking +a tall middle-aged woman, in a long black cloak, black bonnet, and +black gloves, with a face at once stern and peevish. + +"I am the late Mrs. Porson's sister," she said, and stood. + +Sarah courtesied and waited. Clare rose, with Mary in his arms. + +"This is little Maly, ma'am," he said, offering her the child. + +"Set her down, and let me see her," she answered. + +Clare obeyed. Mary put her finger in her mouth, and began to cry. She +did not like the look of the black aunt, and was not used to a harsh +voice. + +"Tut! tut!" said the black aunt. "Crying already! That will never do! +Show me her things." + +Sarah felt stunned. This was worse than death! "If only the mistress +had taken them with her!" she said to herself. + +Mary's things--they were not many--were soon packed. Within an hour +she was borne off, shrieking, struggling, and calling Clay. The black +aunt, however,--as the black aunt Clare always thought of her--cared +nothing for her resistance; and Clare, who at her first cry was +rushing to the rescue, ready once more to do battle for her, was +seized and held back by Farmer Goodenough. Sarah had sent for him, and +he had come--just in time to frustrate Clare's valour. + +The carriage was not yet out of sight, when Farmer Goodenough began to +repent that he had come: his presence was an acknowledgment of +responsibility! Something must be done with the foundling! There was +nobody to claim him, and nobody wanted him! He had always liked the +boy, but he did not want him! His wife was not fond of the boy, nor of +any boy, and did not want him! He had said to her that Clare could not +be left to starve, and she had answered, "Why not?"! What was to be +done with him? Nobody knew--any more than Clare himself. But which of +us knows what is going to be done with him? + +Clare was nobody's business. English farmers no more than French are +proverbial for generosity; and Farmer Goodenough, no bad type of his +class, had a wife in whose thoughts not the pence but the farthings +dominated. She was one who at once recoiled and repelled--one of those +whose skin shrinks from the skin of their kind, and who are specially +apt to take unaccountable dislikes--a pitiable human animal of the +leprous sort. She "never took to the foundling," she said. To have +neither father nor mother, she counted disreputable. But I believe the +main source of her dislike to Clare was a feeling of undefined reproof +in the very atmosphere of the boy's presence, his nature was so +different from hers. What urged him toward his fellow-creatures, made +her draw back from him. In truth she hated the boy. The very look of +him made her sick, she said. It was only a certain respect for the +parson, and a certain fear of her husband, who, seldom angry, was yet +capable of fury, that had prevented her from driving the child, "with +his dish-clout face," off the premises, whenever she saw him from door +or window. It was no wonder the farmer should he at his wits' end to +know what, as churchwarden, guardian of the poor, and friend of the +late vicar--as friendly also to the boy himself, he was bound to do. + +"Where are _you_ going?" he asked Sarah. + +"Where the Lord wills," answered the old woman. Her ark had gone to +pieces, and she hardly cared what became of her. + +"We've got to look to ourselves!" said the farmer. + +"Parson used to say there was One as took that off our hands!" replied +Sarah. + +"Yes, yes," assented Mr. Goodenough, fidgeting a little; "but the +Almighty helps them as helps themselves, and that's sound +doctrine. You really must do something, Sarah! We can't have you on +the parish, you know!" + +"I beg your pardon, sir, but until the child here is provided for, or +until they turn us out of the parsonage, I will not leave the place." + +"The furniture is advertised for sale. You'll have nothing but the +bare walls!" + +"We'll manage to keep each other warm!--Shan't we, Clare?" + +"I will try to keep you warm, Sarah," responded the boy sadly. + +"But the new parson will soon be here. Our souls must be cared for!" + +"Is the Lord's child that came from heaven in an earthquake to be +turned out into the cold for fear the souls of big men should perish?" + +"Something must be done about it!" said the farmer. + +"What it's to be I can't tell! It's no business o' mine any way!" + +"That's what the priest, and the Levite, and the farmer says!" +returned Sarah. + +"Won't you ask Mr. Goodenough to stay to dinner?" said Clare. + +He went up to the farmer, who in his perplexity had seated himself, +and laid his arm on his shoulder. + +"No, I can't," answered Sarah. "He would eat all we have, and not have +enough!" + +"Now Maly is gone," returned Clare, "I would rather not have any +dinner." + +The farmer's old feeling for the boy, which the dread of having him +left on his hands had for the time dulled, came back. + +"Get him his dinner, Sarah," he said. "I've something to see to in the +village. By the time I come back, he'll be ready to go with me, +perhaps." + +"God bless you, sir!" cried Sarah. "You meant it all the time, an' I +been behavin' like a brute!" + +The farmer did not like being taken up so sharply. He had promised +nothing! But he had nearly made up his mind that, as the friend of the +late parson, he could scarcely do less than give shelter to the child +until he found another refuge. True, he was not the parson's child, +but he had loved him as his own! He would make the boy useful, and so +shut his wife's mouth! There were many things Clare could do about the +place! + + + +Chapter XI. + +Clare on the farm. + + +When Mr. Goodenough appeared at the house-door with the boy, his +wife's face expressed what her tongue dared not utter without some +heating of the furnace behind it. But Clare never saw that he was +unwelcome. He had not begun to note outward and visible signs in +regard to his own species; his observation was confined to the +animals, to whose every motion and look he gave heed. But he was +hardly aware of watching even them: his love made it so natural to +watch, and so easy to understand them! He was not drawn to study +Mrs. Goodenough, or to read her indications; he was content to hear +what she said. + +True to her nature, Mrs. Goodenough, seeing she could not at once get +rid of the boy, did her endeavour to make him pay for his +keep. Nominally he continued to attend the village school, where the +old master was doing his best for him; but, oftener than not, she +interposed to prevent his going, and turned him to use about the +house, the dairy, and the poultry-yard. + +His new mode of life occasioned him no sense of hardship. I do not +mean because of his patient acceptance of everything that came; but +because he had been so long accustomed to the ways of a farm, to all +the phases of life and work in yard and field, that nothing there came +strange to him--except having to stick to what he was put to, and +having next to no time to read. Many boys who have found much +amusement in doing this or that, find it irksome the moment it is +required of them: Clare was not of that mean sort; he was a +gentleman. Happily he was put to no work beyond his strength. + +At first, and for some time, he had to do only with the creatures more +immediately under the care of "the mistress," whence his acquaintance +with the poultry and the pigs, the pigeons and the calves--and +specially with such as were delicate or had been hurt--with their ways +of thinking and their carriage and conduct, rapidly increased. + +By and by, however, having already almost ceased to attend school, the +farmer, requiring some passing help a boy could give, took him from +his wife--not without complaint on her part, neither without sense of +relief, and would not part with him again. He was so quick in doing +what was required, so intelligent to catch the meaning not always +thoroughly expressed, so cheerful, and so willing, that he was a +pleasure to Mr. Goodenough--and no less a pleasure to the farmer that +dwelt in Mr. Goodenough, and seemed to most men all there was of him; +for, instead of an expense, he found him a saving. + +It was much more pleasant for Clare to be with his master than with +his mistress, but he fared the worse for it in the house. The woman's +dislike of the boy must find outlet; and as, instead of flowing all +day long, it was now pent up the greater part of it, the stronger it +issued when he came home to his meals. I will not defile my page with +a record of the modes in which she vented her spite. It sought at +times such minuteness of indulgence, that it was next to impossible +for any one to perceive its embodiments except the boy himself. + +He now came more into contact with the larger animals about the place; +and the comfort he derived from them was greater than most people +would readily or perhaps willingly believe. He had kept up his +relations with Nimrod, the bull, and there was never a breach of the +friendship between them. The people about the farm not unfrequently +sought his influence with the animal, for at times they dared hardly +approach him. Clare even made him useful--got a little work out of him +now and then. But his main interest lay in the horses. He had up to +this time known rather less of them than of the other creatures on the +place; now he had to give his chief attention to them, laying in love +the foundation of that knowledge which afterward stood him in such +stead when he came to dwell for a time among certain eastern tribes +whose horses are their chief gladness and care. He used, when alone +with them, to talk to this one or that about the friends he had +lost--his father and mother and Maly and Sarah--and did not mind if +they all listened. He would even tell them sometimes about his own +father and mother--how the whole sky full of angels fell down upon +them and took them away. But he said most about his sister. For her he +mourned more than for any of the rest. Her screams as the black aunt +carried her away, would sometimes come back to him with such +verisimilitude of nearness, that, forgetting everything about him, he +would start to run to her. He felt somehow that it was well with the +others, but Maly had always needed _him_, and more than ever in the +last days of their companionship. He wept for nobody but Maly. In the +night he would wake up suddenly, thinking he heard her crying out for +him. Then he would get out of bed, creep to the stable, go to +Jonathan, and to him pour out his low-voiced complaint. Jonathan was +the biggest and oldest horse on the farm. + +How much he thought they understood of what he told them, I cannot +say. He was never silly; and where we cannot be sure, we may yet have +reason to hope. He believed they knew when he was in trouble, and +sympathized with him, and would gladly have relieved him of his +pain. I suspect most animals know something of the significance of +tears. More animals shed tears themselves than people think. + +For dogs, bless them, they are everywhere, and the boy had known them +from time immemorial. + +In the village, some of Clare's old admirers began to remark that he +no longer "looked the little gentleman." This was caused chiefly by +the state of his clothes. They were not fit for the work to which he +was put, and within a few weeks were very shabby. Besides, he was +growing rapidly, so that he and his garments were in too evident +process of parting company. Accustomed to a mother's attentions, he +had never thought of his clothes except to take care of them for her +sake; now he tried to mend them, but soon found his labour of little +use. He had no wages to buy anything with. His clothes or his health +or his education were nothing to Mrs. Goodenough. It was no concern of +hers whether he looked decent or not. What right had such as he to +look decent? It was more than enough that she fed him! The shabbiness +of the beggarly creature was a consolation to her. + +But Clare's toil in the open air, and his constant and willing +association with the animals, had begun to give him a bucolic +appearance. He grew a trifle browner, and showed here and there a +freckle. His health was splendid. Nothing seemed to hurt him. Hardship +was wholesome to him. To the eyes that hated him, and grudged the hire +of the mere food by which he grew, he seemed every day to enlarge +visibly. Already he gave promise of becoming a man of more than +ordinary strength and vigour. Possibly the animals gave him something. + +What may have been his outlook and hope all this time, who shall tell! +He never grumbled, never showed sign of pain or unwillingness, gave +his mistress no reason for fault-finding. She found it hard even to +discover a pretext. She seemed always ready to strike him, but was +probably afraid to do so without provocation her husband would count +sufficient. Clare never showed discomfort, never even sighed except he +were alone. Chequered as his life had been, if ever he looked forward +to a fresh change, it was but as a far possibility in the slow current +of events. But he was constantly possessed with a large dim sense of +something that lay beyond, waiting for him; something toward which the +tide of things was with certainty drifting him, but with which he had +nothing more to do than wait. He did not see that to do the things +given him to do was the only preparation for whatever, in the dim +under-world of the future, might be preparing for him; but he did feel +that he must do his work. He did not then think much about duty. He +was actively inclined, had a strong feeling for doing a thing as it +ought to be done; and was thoroughly loyal to any one that seemed to +have a right over him. In this blind, enduring, vaguely hopeful way, +he went on--sustained, and none the less certainly that he did not +know it, from the fountain of his life. When the winter came, his +sufferings, cared for as he had been, and accustomed to warmth and +softness, must at times have been considerable. In the day his work +was a protection, but at night the house was cold. He had, however, +plenty to eat, had no ailment, and was not to be greatly pitied. + + + +Chapter XII. + +Clare becomes a guardian of the poor. + + +Simpson, the bully of Clare's childhood, went limping about on a +crutch, permanently lame, and full of hatred toward the innocent +occasion of the injury he had brought upon himself. Ever since his +recovery, he had, loitering about in idleness, watched the boy, to +waylay and catch him at unawares. Not until Clare went to the farm, +however, did he once succeed; for it was not difficult to escape him, +so long as he had not laid actual hold on his prey. But he grew more +and more cunning, and contrived at last, by creeping along hedges and +lying in ambush like a snake, to get his hands upon him. Then the poor +boy fared ill. + +He went home bleeding and torn. The righteous churchwarden rebuked him +with severity for fighting. His mistress told him she was glad he had +met with some one to give him what he deserved, for she could hardly +keep her hands off him. He stared at her with wondering eyes, but said +nothing. She turned from them: the devil in her could not look in the +eyes of the angel in him. The next time he fell into the snare of his +enemy, he managed to conceal what had befallen him. After that he was +too wide awake to be caught. + +There was in the village a child whom nobody heeded. He was far more +destitute than Clare, but had too much liberty. He lived with a +wretched old woman who called him her grandson: whether he was or not +nobody cared. She made her livelihood by letting beds, in a cottage or +rather hovel which seemed to be her own, to wayfarers, mostly tramps, +with or without trades. The child was thus thrown into the worst of +company, and learned many sorts of wickedness. He was already a thief, +and of no small proficiency in his art. Though village-bred, he could +pick a pocket more sensitive than a clown's. Small and deft, he had +never stood before a magistrate. He was a miserable creature, +bare-footed and bare-legged; about eight years of age, but so stunted +that to the first glance he looked less than six--with keen ferret +eyes in red rims, red hair, pasty, freckled complexion, and a +generally unhealthy look; from which marks all, Clare conceived a +pitiful sympathy for him. Their acquaintance began thus:-- + +One day, during his father's last illness, he happened to pass the +door of the grandmother's hovel while the crone was administering to +Tommy a severe punishment with a piece of thick rope: she had been +sharp enough to catch him stealing from herself. Clare heard his +cries. The door being partly open, he ran in, and gave him such +assistance that they managed to bolt together from the hut. A +friendship, for long almost a silent one, was thus initiated between +them. Tommy--Clare never knew his other name, nor did the boy +himself--would off and on watch for a sight of him all day long, but +had the instinct, or experience, never to approach him if any one was +with him. He was careful not to compromise him. The instant the most +momentary _tte--tte_ was possible, he would rush up, offer him +something he had found or stolen, and hurry away again. That he was a +thief Clare had not the remotest suspicion. He had never offered him +anything to suggest theft. + +By and by it came to the knowledge of Clare's enemy that there was a +friendship between them, and the discovery wrought direness for +both. One day Simpson saw Clare coming, and Tommy watching him. He +laid hold of Tommy, and began cuffing him and pulling his hair, to +make him scream, thinking thus to get hold of Clare. But +notwithstanding the lesson he had received, the rascal had not yet any +adequate notion of the boy's capacity for action where another was +concerned. He flew to the rescue, caught up the crutch Simpson had +dropped, and laid it across his back with vigour. The fellow let Tommy +go and turned on Clare, who went backward, brandishing the crutch. + +"Run, Tommy," he cried. + +Tommy retreated a few steps. + +"Run yourself," he counselled, having reached a safe distance. "Take +his third leg with you." + +Clare saw the advice was good, and ran. But the next moment reflection +showed him the helplessness of his enemy. He turned, and saw him +hobbling after him in such evident pain and discomfiture, that he went +to meet him, and politely gave him his crutch. He might have thrown it +to him and gone on, but he had a horror of rudeness, and handed it to +him with a bow. Just as he regained his perpendicular, the crutch +descended on his head, and laid him flat on the ground. There the +tyrant belaboured him. Tommy stood and regarded the proceeding. + +"The cove's older an' bigger an' pluckier than me," he said to +himself; "but he's an ass. He'll come to grief unless he's looked +after. He'll be hanged else. He don't know how to dodge. I'll have to +take him in charge!" + +When he saw Clare free, an event to which he had contributed nothing, +he turned and ran home. + +Simpson redoubled now his persecution of Clare, and persecuted Tommy +because of Clare. He lurked for Tommy now, and when he caught him, +tormented him with choice tortures. In a word, he made his life +miserable. After every such mischance Tommy would hurry to the farm, +and lie about in the hope of a sight of Clare, or possibly a chance of +speaking to him. His repute was so bad that he dared not show himself. + +Hot tears would come into Clare's eyes as he listened to the not +always unembellished tale of Tommy's sufferings at the hands of +Simpson; but he never thought of revenge, only of protection or escape +for the boy. It comforted him to believe that he was growing, and +would soon be a match for the oppressor. + +Whether at this time he felt any great interest in life, or recognized +any personal advantage in growing, I doubt. But he had the friendship +of the animals; and it is not surprising that creatures their maker +thinks worth making and keeping alive, should yield consolation to one +that understands them, or even fill with a mild joy the pauses of +labour in an irksome life. + +Then each new day was an old friend to the boy. Each time the sun +rose, new hope rose with him in his heart. He came every morning fresh +from home, with a fresh promise. The boy read the promise in his great +shining, and believed it; gazed and rejoiced, and turned to his work. + +But the hour arrived when his mistress could bear his presence no +longer. Some petty loss, I imagine, had befallen her. Nothing touched +her like the loss of money--the love of which is as dread a passion as +the love of drink, and more ruinous to the finer elements of the +nature. It was like the tearing out of her heart to Mrs. Goodenough to +lose a shilling. Her self-command forsook her, perhaps, in some such +moment of vexation; anyhow, she opened the sluices of her hate, and +overwhelmed him with it in the presence of her husband. + +The farmer knew she was unfair, knew the orphan a good boy and a +diligent, knew there was nothing against him but the antipathy of his +wife. But, annoyed with her injustice, he was powerless to change her +heart. Since the boy came to live with them, he had had no pleasure in +his wife's society. She had always been moody and dissatisfied, but +since then had been unbearable. Constantly irritated with and by her +because of Clare, he had begun to regard him as the destroyer of his +peace, and to feel a grudge against him. He sat smouldering with +bodiless rage, and said nothing. + +Clare too was silent,--for what could he say? Where is the wisdom that +can answer hatred? He carried to his friend Jonathan a heart heavy and +perplexed. + +"Why does she hate me so, Jonathan?" he murmured. + +The big horse kissed his head all over, but made him no other answer. + + + +Chapter XIII. + +Clare the vagabond. + + +The next morning Clare happened to do something not altogether to the +farmer's mind. It was a matter of no consequence--only cleaning that +side of one of the cow-houses first which was usually cleaned last. He +gave him a box on the ear that made him stagger, and then stand +bewildered. + +"What do you mean by staring that way?" cried the farmer, annoyed with +himself and seeking justification in his own eyes. "Am I not to box +your ears when I choose?" And with that he gave him another blow. + +Then first it dawned on Clare that he was not wanted, that he was no +good to anybody. He threw down his scraper, and ran from the +cow-house; ran straight from the farm to the lane, and from the lane +to the high road. Buffets from the hand of his only friend, and the +sudden sense of loneliness they caused, for the moment bereft Clare of +purpose. It was as if his legs had run away with him, and he had +unconsciously submitted to their abduction. + +At the mouth of the lane, where it opened on the high road, he ran +against Tommy turning the corner, eager to find him. The eyes of the +small human monkey were swollen with weeping; his nose was bleeding, +and in size and shape scarce recognizable as a nose. At the sight, the +consciousness of his protectorate awoke in Clare, and he stopped, +unable to speak, but not unable to listen. Tommy blubbered out a +confused, half-inarticulate something about "granny and the other +devil," who between them had all but killed him. + +"What can I do?" said Clare, his heart sinking with the sense of +having no help in him. + +Tommy was ready to answer the question. He had been hatching vengeance +all the way. Eagerly came his proposition--that they should, in their +turn, lie in ambush for Simpson, and knock his crutch from under +him. That done, Clare should belabour him with it, while he ran like +the wind and set his grandmother's house on fire. + +"She'll be drunk in bed, an' she'll be burned to death!" cried +Tommy. "Then we'll mizzle!" + +"But it would hurt them both very badly, Tommy!" said Clare, as if +unfolding the reality of the thing to a foolish child. + +"Well! all right! the worse the better! 'Ain't they hurt us?" rejoined +Tommy. + +"That's how we know it's not nice!" answered Clare. "If they set it a +going, we ain't to keep it a going!" + +"Then they'll be at it for ever," cried Tommy, "an' I'm sick of it! +I'll _kill_ granny! I swear I will, if I'm hanged for it! She's said a +hundred times she'd pull my legs when I was hanged; but _she_ won't be +at the hanging!" + +"Why shouldn't you run for it first?" said Clare. "Then they wouldn't +want to hang you!" + +"Then I shouldn't have nobody!" replied Tommy, whimpering. + +"I should have thought Nobody was as good as granny!" said Clare. + +"A big bilin' better!" answered Tommy bitterly. "I wasn't meanin' +granny--nor yet stumpin' Simpson." + +"I don't know what you're driving at," said Clare. Tommy burst into +tears. + +"Ain't you the only one I got, up or down?" he cried. + +Tommy had a little bit of heart--not much, but enough to have a chance +of growing. If ever creature had less than that, he was not human. I +do not think he could even be an ape. + +Some of the people about the parson used to think Clare had no heart, +and Mrs. Goodenough was sure of it. He had not a spark of gratitude, +she said. But the cause of this opinion was that Clare's affection +took the shape of deeds far more than of words. Never were judges of +their neighbours more mistaken. The chief difference between Clare's +history and that of most others was, that his began at the unusual +end. Clare began with loving everybody; and most people take a long +time to grow to that. Hence, those whom, from being brought nearest to +them, he loved specially, he loved without that outbreak of show which +is often found in persons who love but a few, and whose love is +defiled with partisanship. He loved quietly and constantly, in a +fashion as active as undemonstrative. He was always glad to be near +those he specially loved; beyond that, the signs of his love were +practical--it came out in ministration, in doing things for +them. There are those who, without loving, desire to be loved, because +they love themselves; for those that are worth least are most precious +to themselves. But Clare never thought of the love of others to +him--from no heartlessness, but that he did not think about +himself--had never done so, at least, until the moment when he fled +from the farm with the new agony in his heart that nobody wanted him, +that everybody would be happier without him. Happy is he that does not +think of himself before the hour when he becomes conscious of the +bliss of being loved. For it must be and ought to be a happy moment +when one learns that another human creature loves him; and not to be +grateful for love is to be deeply selfish. Clare had always loved, but +had not thought of any one as loving him, or of himself as being loved +by any one. + +"Well," rejoined Clare, struggling with his misery, "ain't I going +myself?" + +"You going!--That's chaff!" + +"'Tain't chaff. I'm on my way." + +"What! Going to hook it? Oh golly! what a lark! Won't Farmer +Goodenough look blue!" + +"He'll think himself well rid of me," returned Clare with a sigh. "But +there's no time to talk. If you're going, Tommy, come along." + +He turned to go. + +"Where to?" asked Tommy, following. + +"I don't know. Anywhere away," answered Clare, quickening his pace. + +In spite of his swollen visage, Tommy's eyes grew wider. + +"You 'ain't cribbed nothing?" he said. + +"I don't know what you mean." + +"You 'ain't stole something?" interpreted Tommy. + +Clare stopped, and for the first time on his own part, lifted his hand +to strike. It dropped immediately by his side. + +"No, you poor Tommy," he said. "I don't steal." + +"Thought you didn't! What are you running away for then?" + +"Because they don't want me." + +"Lord! what will you do?" + +"Work." + +Tommy held his tongue: he knew a better way than that! If work was the +only road to eating, things would go badly with _him_! But he thought +he knew a thing or two, and would take his chance! There were degrees +of hunger that were not so bad as the thrashings he got, for in his +granny's hands the rope might fall where it would; while all cripple +Simpson cared for was to make him squeal satisfactorily. But work was +worse than all! He would go with Clare, but not to work! Not he! + +Clare kept on in silence, never turning his head--out into the +untried, unknown, mysterious world, which lay around the one spot he +knew as the darkness lies about the flame of the candle. They walked +more than a mile before either spoke. + + + +Chapter XIV. + +Their first helper + + +It was a lovely spring morning. The sun was about thirty degrees above +the horizon, shining with a liquid radiance, as if he had already +drawn up and was shining through the dew of the morning, though it lay +yet on all the grasses by the roadside, turning them into gem-plants. +Every sort of gem sparkled on their feathery or beady tops, and their +long slender blades. At the first cottages they passed, the women were +beginning their day's work, sweeping clean their floors and +door-steps. Clare noted that where were most flowers in the garden, +the windows were brightest, and the children cleanest. + +"The flowers come where they make things nice for them!" he said to +himself. "Where the flowers see dirt, they turn away, and won't come +out." + +From childhood he had had the notion that the flowers crept up inside +the stalks until they found a window to look out at. Where the +prospect was not to their mind they crept down, and away by some door +in the root to try again. For all the stalks stood like watch-towers, +ready for them to go up and peep out. + +They came to a pond by a farm-house. Clare had been observing with +pity how wretched Tommy's clothes were; but when he looked into the +pond he saw that his own shabbiness was worse than Tommy's downright +miserableness. Nobody would leave either of them within reach of +anything worth stealing! What he wore had been his Sunday suit, and it +was not even worth brushing! + +"I'm 'orrid 'ungry," said Tommy. "I 'ain't swallered a plug this +mornin', 'xcep' a lump o' bread out o' granny's cupboard. That's what +I got my weltin' for. It were a whole half-loaf, though--an' none so +dry!" + +Clare had eaten nothing, and had been up since five o'clock--at work +all the time till the farmer struck him: he was quite as hungry as +Tommy. What was to be done? Besides a pocket-handkerchief he had but +one thing alienable. + +The very day she was taken ill, he had been in the store-room with his +mother, and she, knowing the pleasure he took in the scent of brown +Windsor-soap, had made him a present of a small cake. This he had kept +in his pocket ever since, wrapt in a piece of rose-coloured paper, his +one cherished possession: hunger deadening sorrow, the time was come +to bid it farewell. His heart ached to part with it, but Tommy and he +were so hungry! + +They went to the door of the house, and knocked--first Clare very +gently, then Tommy with determination. It was opened by a matron who +looked at them over the horizon of her chin. + +"Please, ma'am," said Clare, "will you give us a piece of bread?--as +large a piece, please, as you can spare; and I will give you this +piece of brown Windsor-soap." + +As he ended his speech, he took a farewell whiff of his favourite +detergent. + +"Soap!" retorted the dame. "Who wants your soap! Where did you get it? +Stole it, I don't doubt! Show it here." + +She took it in her hand, and held it to her nose. + +"Who gave it you?" + +"My mother," answered Clare. + +"Where's your mother?" + +Clare pointed upward. + +"Eh? Oh--hanged! I thought, so!" + +She threw the soap into the yard, and closed the door. Clare darted +after his property, pounced upon it, and restored it lovingly to his +pocket. + +As they were leaving the yard disconsolate, they saw a cart full of +turnips. Tommy turned and made for it. + +"Don't, Tommy," cried Clare. + +"Why not? I'm hungry," answered Tommy, "an' you see it's no use +astin'!" + +He flew at the cart, but Clare caught and held him. + +"They ain't ours, Tommy," he said. + +"Then why don't you take one?" retorted Tommy. + +"That's why you shouldn't." + +"It's why you should, for then it 'ud be yours." + +"To take it wouldn't make it ours, Tommy." + +"Wouldn't it, though? I believe when I'd eaten it, it would be +mine--rather!" + +"No, it wouldn't. Think of having in your stomach what wasn't yours! +No, you must pay for it. Perhaps they would take my soap for a +turnip. I believe it's worth two turnips." + +He spied a man under a shed, ran to him, and made offer of the soap +for a turnip apiece. + +"I don't want your soap," answered the man, "an' I don't recommend +cold turmits of a mornin'. But take one if you like, and clear +out. The master's cart-whip 'ill be about your ears the moment he sees +you!" + +"Ain't you the master, sir?" + +"No, I ain't." + +"Then the turnips ain't yours?" said Clare, looking at him with +hungry, regretful eyes, for he could have eaten a raw potato. + +"You're a deal too impudent to be hungry!" said the man, making a blow +at him with his open hand, which Clare dodged. "Be off with you, or +I'll set the dog on you." + +"I'm very sorry," said Clare. "I did not mean to offend you." + +"Clear out, I say. Double trot!" + +Hungry as the boys were, they must trudge! No bread, no turnip for +them! Nothing but trudge, trudge till they dropped! + +When they had gone about five miles further, they sat down, as if by +common consent, on the roadside; and Tommy, used to crying, began to +cry. Clare did not seek to stop him, for some instinct told him it +must be a relief. + +By and by a working-man came along the road. Clare hesitated, but +Tommy's crying urged him. He rose and stood ready to accost him. As +soon as he came up, however, the man stopped of himself. He questioned +Clare and listened to his story, then counselled the boys to go back. + +"I'm not wanted, sir," said Clare. + +"They'd kill _me_," said Tommy. + +"God help you, boys!" returned the man. "You may be telling me lies, +and you may be telling me the truth!--A liar may be hungry, but +somehow I grudge my dinner to a liar!" + +As he spoke he untied the knots of a blue handkerchief with white +spots, gave them its contents of bread and cheese, wiped his face with +it, and put it in his pocket; lifted his bag of tools, and went his +way. He had lost his dinner and saved his life! + +The dinner, being a man's, went a good way toward satisfying them, +though empty corners would not have been far to seek, had there been +anything to put in them. As it was, they started again refreshed and +hopeful. What had come to them once might reasonably come again! + + + +Chapter XV. + +Their first host. + + +As the evening drew on, and began to settle down into night, a new +care arose in the mind of the elder boy. Where were they to pass the +darkness?--how find shelter for sleep? It was a question that gave +Tommy no anxiety. He had been on the tramp often, now with one party, +now with another of his granny's lodgers, and had frequently slept in +the open air, or under the rudest covert. Tommy had not much +imagination to trouble him, and in his present moral condition was +possibly better without it; but to inexperienced Clare there was +something fearful in having the night come so close to him. Sleep out +of doors he had never thought of. To lie down with the stars looking +at him, nothing but the blue wind between him and them, was like being +naked to the very soul. Doubtless there would be creatures about, to +share the night with him, and protect him from its awful bareness; but +they would be few for the size of the room, and he might see none of +them! It was the sense of emptiness, the lack of present life that +dismayed him. He had never seen any creatures to shrink from. He +disliked no one of the things that creep or walk or fly. Before long +he did come to know and dislike at least one sort; and the sea held +creatures that in after years made him shudder; but as yet, not even +rats, so terrible to many, were a terror to Clare. It was Nothing that +he feared. + +My reader may say, "But had no one taught him about God?" Yes, he had +heard about God, and about Jesus Christ; had heard a great deal about +them. But they always seemed persons a long way off. He knew, or +thought he knew, that God was everywhere, but he had never felt his +presence a reality. He seemed in no place where Clare's eyes ever +fell. He never thought, "God is here." Perhaps the sparrows knew more +about God than he did then. When he looked out into the night it +always seemed vacant, therefore horrid, and he took it for as empty as +it looked. And if there had been no God there, it would have been +reasonable indeed to be afraid; for the most frightful of notions is +_Nothing-at-all_. + +It grew dark, and they were falling asleep on their walking legs, when +they came to a barn-yard. Very glad were they to creep into it, and +search for the warmest place. It was a quiet part of the country, and +for years nothing had been stolen from anybody, so that the people +were not so watchful as in many places. + +They went prowling about, but even Tommy with innocent intent, eager +only after a little warmth, and as much sleep as they could find, and +came at length to an open window, through which they crawled into +what, by the smell and the noises, they knew to be a stable. It was +very dark, but Clare was at home, and felt his way about; while Tommy, +who was afraid of the horses, held close to him. Clare's hand fell +upon the hind-quarters of a large well-fed horse. The huge animal was +asleep standing, but at the touch of the small hand he gave a low +whinny. Tommy shuddered at the sound. + +"He's pleased," said Clare, and crept up on his near side into the +stall. There he had soon made such friends with him, that he did not +hesitate to get in among the hay the horse had for his supper. + +"Here, Tommy!" he cried in a whisper; "there's room for us both in the +manger." + +But Tommy stood shaking. He fancied the darkness full of horses' +heads, and would not stir. Clare had to get out again, and search for +a place to suit his fancy, which he found in an untenanted loose-box, +with remains of litter. There Tommy coiled himself up, and was soon +fast asleep. + +Clare returned to the hospitality of the big horse. The great nostrils +snuffed him over and over as he lay, and the boy knew the horse made +him welcome. He dropped asleep stroking the muzzle of his +chamber-fellow, and slept all the night, kept warm by the horse's +breath, and the near furnace of his great body. + +In the morning the boys found they had slept too long, for they were +discovered. But though they were promptly ejected as vagabonds, and +not without a few kicks and cuffs, these were not administered without +the restraint of some mercy, for their appearance tended to move pity +rather than indignation. + + + +Chapter XVI. + +On the tramp. + + +With the new day came the fresh necessity for breakfast, and the fresh +interest in the discovery of it. But breakfast is a thing not always +easiest to find where breakfasts most abound; nor was theirs when +found that morning altogether of a sort to be envied, ill as they +could afford to despise it. Passing, on their goal-less way, a +flour-mill, the door of which was half-open, they caught sight of a +heap, whether floury dust or dusty flour, it would have been hard to +say, that seemed waiting only for them to help themselves from +it. Fain to still the craving of birds too early for any worm, they +swallowed a considerable portion of it, choking as it was, nor met +with rebuke. There was good food in it, and they might have fared +worse. + +Another day's tramp was thus inaugurated. How it was to end no one in +the world knew less than the trampers. + +Before it was over, a considerable change had passed upon Clare; for a +new era was begun in his history, and he started to grow more +rapidly. Hitherto, while with his father or mother, or with his little +sister, making life happy to her; even while at the farm, doing hard +work, he had lived with much the same feeling with which he read a +story: he was in the story, half dreaming, half acting it. The +difference between a thing that passed through his brain from the +pages of a book, or arose in it as he lay in bed either awake or +asleep, and the thing in which he shared the life and motion of the +day, was not much marked in his consciousness. He was a dreamer with +open eyes and ready hands, not clearly distinguishing thought and +action, fancy and fact. Even the cold and hunger he had felt at the +farm had not sufficed to wake him up; he had only had to wait and they +were removed. But now that he did not know whence his hunger was to be +satisfied, or where shelter was to be had; now also that there was a +hunger outside him, and a cold that was not his, which yet he had to +supply and to frustrate in the person of Tommy, life began to grow +real to him; and, which was far more, he began to grow real to +himself, as a power whose part it was to encounter the necessities +thus presented. He began to understand that things were required of +him. He had met some of these requirements before, and had satisfied +them, but without knowing them as requirements. He did it half awake, +not as a thinking and willing source of the motion demanded. He did it +all by impulse, hardly by response. Now we are put into bodies, and +sent into the world, to wake us up. We might go on dreaming for ages +if we were left without bodies that the wind could blow upon, that the +rain could wet, and the sun scorch, bodies to feel thirst and cold and +hunger and wounds and weariness. The eternal plan was beginning to +tell upon Clare. He was in process of being changed from a dreamer to +a man. It is a good thing to be a dreamer, but it is a bad thing +indeed to be _only_ a dreamer. He began to see that everybody in the +world had to do something in order to get food; that he had worked for +the farmer and his wife, and they had fed him. He had worked willingly +and eaten gladly, but had not before put the two together. He saw now +that men who would be men must work. + +His eyes fell upon a congregation of rooks in a field by the +roadside. "Are _they_ working?" he thought; "or are they stealing? If +it be stealing they are at, it looks like hard work as well. It can't +be stealing though; they were made to live, and _how_ are they to live +if they don't grub? that's their work! Still the corn ain't theirs! +Perhaps it's only worms they take! Are the worms theirs? A man should +die rather than steal, papa said. But, if they are stealing, the crows +don't know it; and if they don't know it, they ain't thieves! Is that +it?" + +The same instant came the report of a gun. A crowd of rooks rose +cawing. One of them dropped and lay. + +"He must have been stealing," thought Clare, "for see what comes of +it! Would they shoot me if I stole? Better be shot than die of hunger! +Yes, but better die of hunger than be a thief!" + +He had read stories about thieves and honest boys, and had never seen +any difficulty in the matter. Nor had he yet a notion of how difficult +it is not to be a thief--that is, to be downright honest. If anybody +thinks it easy, either he has not known much of life, or he has never +tried to be honest; he has done just like other people. Clare did not +know that many a boy whose heart sided with the honest boy in the +story, has grown up a dishonourable man--a man ready to benefit +himself to the disadvantage of others; that many a man who passes for +respectable in this disreputable world, is counted far meaner than a +thief in the next, and is going there to be put in prison. But he +began to see that it is not enough to mean well; that he must be +sharp, and mind what he was about; else, with hunger worrying inside +him, he might be a thief before he knew. He was on the way to discover +that to think rightly--to be on the side of what is honourable when +reading a story, is a very different thing from doing right, and being +honourable, when the temptation is upon us. Many a boy when he reads +this will say, "Of course it is!" and when the time comes, will be a +sneak. + +Those crows set Clare thinking; and it was well; for if he had not +done as those thinkings taught him, he would have given a very +different turn to his history. Meditation and resolve, on the top of +honourable habit, brought him to this, that, when he saw what was +right, he just did it--did it without hesitation, question, or +struggle. Every man must, who would be a free man, who would not be +the slave of the universe and of himself. + + + +Chapter XVII. + +The baker's cart. + + +The sweepings of the mill-floor did not last them long, and by the +time they saw rising before them the spires and chimneys of the small +county town to which the road had been leading them, they were very +hungry indeed--as hungry as they well could be without having begun to +grow faint. The moment he saw them, Clare began revolving in his mind +once more, as many times on the way, what he was to do to get work: +Tommy of course was too small to do anything, and Clare must earn +enough for both. He could think of nothing but going into the shops, +or knocking at the house-doors, and asking for something to do. So +filled was he with his need of work, and with the undefined sense of a +claim for work, that he never thought how much against him must be the +outward appearance which had so dismayed himself when he saw it in the +pond; never thought how unwilling any one would be to employ him, or +what a disadvantage was the company of Tommy, who had every mark of a +born thief. + +I do not know if, on his tramps, Tommy had been in a town before, but +to Clare all he saw bore the aspect of perfect novelty, +notwithstanding the few city-shapes that floated in faintest shadow, +like memories of old dreams, in his brain. He was delighted with the +grand look of the place, with its many people and many shops. His hope +of work at once became brilliant and convincing. + +Noiselessly and suddenly Tommy started from his side, but so much +occupied was he with what he beheld and what he thought, that he +neither saw him go nor missed him when gone. He became again aware of +him by finding himself pulled toward the entrance of a narrow lane. +Tommy pulled so hard that Clare yielded, and went with him into the +lane, but stopped immediately. For he saw that Tommy had under his arm +a big loaf, and the steam of newly-baked bread was fragrant in his +nostrils. Never smoke so gracious greeted those of incense-loving +priest. Tommy tugged and tugged, but Clare stood stock-still. + +"Where did you get that beautiful loaf, Tommy?" he asked. + +"Off on a baker's cart," said Tommy. "Don't be skeered; he never saw +me! That was my business, an' I seed to 't." + +"Then you stole it, Tommy?" + +"Yes," grumbled Tommy, "--if that's the name you put upon it when your +trousers is so slack you've got to hold on to them or they'd trip you +up!" + +"Where's the cart?" + +"In the street there." + +"Come along." + +Clare took the loaf from Tommy, and turned to find the baker's +cart. Tommy's face fell, and he was conscious only of bitterness. Why +had he yielded to sentiment--not that he knew the word--when he longed +like fire to bury his sharp teeth in that heavenly loaf? Love--not to +mention a little fear--had urged him to carry it straight to Clare, +and this was his reward! He was going to give him up to the baker! +There was gratitude for you! He ought to have known better than trust +_anybody_, even Clare! Nobody was to be trusted but yourself! It did +seem hard to Tommy. + +They had scarcely turned the corner when they came upon the cart. The +baker was looking the other way, talking to some one, and Clare +thought to lay down the loaf and say nothing about it: there was no +occasion for the ceremony of apology where offence was unknown. But in +the very act the baker turned and saw him. He sprang upon him, and +collared him. The baker was not nice to look at. + +"I have you!" he cried, and shook him as if he would have shaken his +head off. + +"It's quite a mistake, sir!" was all Clare could get out, so fierce +was the earthquake that rattled the house of his life. + +"Mistaken am I? I like that!--Police!" + +And with that the baker shook him again. + +A policeman was not far off; he heard the man call, and came running. + +"Here's a gen'leman as wants the honour o' your acquaintance, Bob!" +said the baker. + +But Tommy saw that, from his size, he was more likely to get off than +Clare if he told the truth. + +"Please, policeman," he said, "it wasn't him; it was me as took the +loaf." + +"You little liar!" shouted the baker. "Didn't I see him with his hand +on the loaf?" + +"He was a puttin' of it back," said Tommy. "I wish he'd been +somewheres else! See what he been an' got by it! If he'd only ha' let +me run, there wouldn't ha' been nobody the wiser. I _am_ sorry I +didn't run. Oh, I _ham_ so 'ungry!" + +Tommy doubled himself up, with his hands inside the double. + +"'Ungry, are you?" roared the baker. "That's what thieves off a +baker's cart ought to be! They ought to be always 'ungry--'ungry to +all eternity, they ought! An' that's what's goin' to be done to 'em!" + +"Look here!" cried a pale-faced man in the front of the crowd, who +seemed a mechanic. "There's a way of tellin' whether the boy's +speakin' the truth _now_!" + +He caught up the restored loaf, halved it cleverly, and handed each of +the boys a part. + +"Now, baker, what's to pay?" he said, and drew himself up, for the man +was too angry at once to reply. + +The boys were tearing at the delicious bread, blind and deaf to all +about them. + +"P'r'aps you would like to give _me_ in charge?" pursued their +saviour. + +"Sixpence," said the man sullenly. + +The mechanic laid sixpence on the cover of the cart. + +"I ought to ha' made you weigh and make up," he said. "Where's your +scales?" + +"Mind your own business." + +"I mean to. Here! I want another sixpenny loaf--but I want it weighed +this time!" + +"I ain't bound to sell bread in the streets. You can go to the +shop. Them loaves is for reg'lar customers." + +He moved off with his cart, and the crowd began to disperse. The boys +stood absorbed, each in what remained of his half-loaf. + +When he looked up, Clare saw that they were alone. But he caught sight +of their benefactor some way off, and ran after him. + +"Oh, sir!" he said, "I was so hungry, I don't know whether I thanked +you for the loaf. We'd had nothing to-day but the sweepings of a +mill." + +"God bless my soul!" said the man. "People say there's a God!" he +added. + +"I think there must be, sir, for you came by just then!" returned +Clare. + +"How do you come to be so hard-up, my boy? Somebody's to blame +somewheres!" + +"There ain't no harm in being hungry, so long as the loaf comes!" +rejoined Clare. "When I get work we shall be all right!" + +"That's your sort!" said the man. "But if there had been a God, as +people say, he would ha' made me fit to gi'e you a job, i'stead o' +stan'in' here as you see me, with ne'er a turn o' work to do for +myself!" + +"I'll work my hardest to pay you back your sixpence," said Clare. + +"Nay, nay, lad! Don't you trouble about that. I ha' got two or three +more i' my pocket, thank God!" + +"You have two Gods, have you, sir?" said Clare;"--one who does things +for you, and one who don't?" + +"Come, you young shaver! you're too much for me!" said the man +laughing. + +Tommy, having finished his bread, here thought fit to join them. He +came slyly up, looking impudent now he was filled, with his hands +where his pockets should have been. + +"It was you stole the loaf, you little rascal!" said the workman, +seeing thief in every line of the boy. + +"Yes," answered Tommy boldly, "an' I don't see no harm. The baker had +lots, and he wasn't 'ungry! It was Clare made a mull of it! He's such +a duffer you don't know! He acshally took it back to the brute! He +deserved what he got! The loaf was mine. It wasn't his! _I_ stole it!" + +"Oh, ho! it wasn't his! it was yours, was it?--Why do you go about +with a chap like this, young gentleman?" said the man, turning to +Clare. "I know by your speech you 'ain't been brought up alongside o' +sech as him!" + +"I had to go away, and he came with me," answered Clare. + +"You'd better get rid of him. He'll get you into trouble." + +"I can't get rid of him," replied Clare. "But I shall teach him not to +take what isn't his. He don't know better now. He's been ill-used all +his life." + +"You don't seem over well used yourself," said the man. + +He saw that Clare's clothes had been made for a boy in good +circumstances, though they had been long worn, and were much +begrimed. His face, his tone, his speech convinced him that they had +been made for _him_, and that he had had a gentle breeding. + +"Look you here, young master," he continued; "you have no right to be +in company with that boy. He'll bring you to grief as sure as I tell +you." + +"I shall be able to bear it," answered Clare with a sigh. + +"He'll be the loss of your character to you." + +"I 'ain't got a character to lose," replied Clare. "I thought I had; +but when nobody will believe me, where's my character then?" + +"Now you're wrong there," returned the man. "I'm not much, I know; but +I believe every word you say, and should be very sorry to find myself +mistaken." + +"Thank you, sir," said Clare. "May I carry your bag for you?" + +If Clare had seen what then passed in Tommy's mind, at the back of +those glistening ferret-eyes of his, he would have been almost +reconciled to taking the man's advice, and getting rid of him. Tommy +was saying to himself that his pal wasn't such a duffer after all--he +was on the lay for the man's tools! + +Tommy never reasoned except in the direction of cunning self-help--of +fitting means and intermediate ends to the one main object of +eating. It is wonderful what a sharpener of the poor wits hunger is! + +"I guess I'm the abler-bodied pauper!" answered the man; and picking +up the bag he had dropped at his feet while they conversed, he walked +away. + +There are many more generous persons among the poor than among the +rich--a fact that might help some to understand how a rich man should +find it hard to enter into the kingdom of heaven. It is hard for +everybody, but harder for the rich. Men who strive to make money are +unconsciously pulling instead of pushing at the heavy gate of the +kingdom. + +"Tommy!" said Clare, in a tone new to himself, for a new sense of +moral protection had risen in him, "if ever you steal anything again, +either I give you a hiding, or you and I part company." + +Tommy bored his knuckles into his red eyes, and began to +whimper. Again it was hard for Tommy! He had followed Clare, thinking +to supply what was lacking to him; to do for him what he was not +clever enough to do for himself; in short, to make an advantageous +partnership with him, to which he should furnish the faculty of +picking up unconsidered trifles. Tommy judged Clare defective in +intellect, and quite unpractical. He was of the mind of the +multitude. The common-minded man always calls the man who thinks of +righteousness before gain, who seeks to do the will of God and does +not seek to make a fortune, unpractical. He _will_ not see that the +very essence of the practical lies in doing the right thing. + +Tommy, in a semi-conscious way, had looked to Clare to supply the +strength and the innocent look, while he supplied the head and the +lively fingers; and here was Clare knocking the lovely plan to pieces! +He did well to be angry! But Clare was the stronger; and Tommy knew +that, when Clare was roused, though it was not easy to rouse him, he +could and would and did fight--not, indeed, as the little coward said +to himself _he_ could fight, like a wild cat, but like a blundering +hornless old cow defending her calf from a cur. + +In the heart of all his selfishness, however, Tommy did a little love +Clare; and his love came, not from Tommy, but from the same source as +his desire for food, namely, from the God that was in Tommy, the God +in whom Tommy lived and had his being with Clare. Whether Tommy's love +for Clare would one day lift him up beside Clare, that is, make him an +honest boy like Clare, remained to be seen. + +Finding his demonstration make no impression, Tommy took his knuckles +out of his eye-holes and thrust them into his pocket-holes, turned his +back on his friend, and began to whistle--with a lump of self-pity in +his throat. + + + +Chapter XVIII. + +Beating the town. + + +They turned their faces again toward the centre of the town, and +resumed their walk, taking in more of what they saw than while they +had not yet had the second instalment of their daily bread. What a +thing is food! It is the divineness of the invention--the need for the +food, and the food for the need--that makes those who count their +dinner the most important thing in the day, such low creatures: +nothing but what is good in itself can be turned into vileness. It is +a delight to see a boy with a good honest appetite; a boy that _loves_ +his dinner is a loathsome creature. Eat heartily, my boy, but be ready +to share, even when you are hungry, and have only what you could eat +up yourself, else you are no man. Remember that you created neither +your hunger nor your food; that both came from one who cares for you +and your neighbours as well. + +In the strength of the half-loaf he had eaten, the place looked to +Clare far more wonderful, and his hopes of earning his bread grew yet +more radiant. But he passed one shop after another, and always +something prevented him from going in. One after another did not look +just the right sort, did not seem to invite him: the next might be +better! I dare say but for that half-loaf, he would have made a trial +sooner, but I doubt if he would have succeeded sooner. He did not +think of going to parson, doctor, or policeman for advice; he went +walking and staring, followed by Tommy with his hands in his +pocketless pocket-holes. Clare was not yet practical in device, though +perfect in willingness, and thorough in design. Up one street and down +another they wandered, seeing plenty of food through windows, and in +carts and baskets, but never any coming their way, except in the form +of tempting odours that issued from almost every house, and grew in +keenness and strength toward one o'clock. Oh those odours!--agonizing +angels of invisible yet most material good! Of what joys has not the +Father made us capable, when the poorest necessity is linked with such +pain! What a tormenting thing--and what a good must be meant to come +out of it!--to be hungry, downright, cravingly hungry with the whole +microcosm, and not a halfpenny to buy a mouthful of assuagement!--to +be assailed with wafts of deliriously undefined promise, not one of +which seems likely to be fulfilled!--promise true to men hurrying home +to dinner or luncheon, but only rousing greater desire in such as +Clare and Tommy. Not one opportunity of appropriation presented +itself, else it would have gone ill with Tommy, now that the eyes and +ears of his guardian were on the alert. For Clare thought of him now +as a little thievish pup, for whose conduct, manners, and education he +was responsible. + +The agony began at length to abate--ready to revive with augmented +strength when the next hour for supplying the human furnace should +begin to approach. Few even of those who know what hunger is, +understand to what it may grow--how desire becomes longing, longing +becomes craving, and craving a wild passion of demand. It must be +terrible to be hungry, and not know God! + +As the evening came down upon them, worn out, faint with want, +shivering with cold, and as miserable in prospect as at the moment, +yet another need presented itself with equally imperative +requisition--that of shelter that they might rest. It was even more +imperative: they could not eat; they _must_ lie down! + +Whether it be a rudiment retained from their remote ancestry, I cannot +tell, but any kind of suffering will wake in some a masterful impulse +to burrow; and as the boys walked about in their misery, white with +cold and hunger, Clare's eyes kept turning to every shallowest +archway, every breach in wall or hedge that seemed to offer the least +chance of covert, while, every now and then, Tommy would bolt from his +side to peer into some opening whose depth was not immediately patent +to his ferret-gaze. Once, in a lane on the outskirts of the town, he +darted into a narrow doorway in the face of a wall, but instantly +rushed back in horror: within was a well, where water lay still and +dark. Then first Clare had a hint of the peculiar dread Tommy had of +water, especially of water dark and unexpected. Possibly he had once +been thrown into such water to be got rid of. But Clare at the moment +was too weary to take much notice of his dismay. + +It was an old town in which they were wandering, and change in the +channels of traffic had so turned its natural nourishment aside, that +it was in parts withering and crumbling away. Not a few of the houses +were, some from poverty, some from utter disuse, yielding fast to +decay. But there were other causes for the condition of one, which, +almost directly they came out of the lane I have just mentioned, into +the end of a wide silent street, drew the roving, questing eyes of +Clare and Tommy. The moon was near the full and shining clear, so that +they could perfectly see the state it was in. Most of its windows were +broken; its roof was like the back of a very old horse; its +chimney-pots were jagged and stumped with fracture; from one of them, +by its entangled string, the skeleton of a kite hung half-way down the +front. But, notwithstanding such signs of neglect, the red-brick wall +and the wrought-iron gate, both seven feet high, that shut the place +off from the street, stood in perfect aged strength. The moment they +saw it, the house seemed to say to them, "There's nobody here: come +in!" but the gate and the wall said, "Begone!" + + + +Chapter XIX. + +The blacksmith and his forge. + + +At the end of the wall was a rough boarded fence, in contact with it, +and reaching, some fifty yards or so, to a hovel in which a +blacksmith, of unknown antecedents, had taken possession of a forsaken +forge, and did what odd jobs came in his way. The boys went along the +fence till they came to the forge, where, looking in, they saw the +blacksmith working his bellows. To one with the instincts of Clare's +birth and breeding, he did not look a desirable acquaintance. Tommy +was less fastidious, but he felt that the scowl on the man's brows +boded little friendliness. Clare, however, who hardly knew what fear +was, did not hesitate to go in, for he was drawn as with a cart-rope +by the glow of the fire, and the sparks which, as they gazed, began, +like embodied joys, to fly merrily from the iron. Tommy followed, +keeping Clare well between him and the black-browed man, who rained +his blows on the rosy iron in his pincers, as if he hated it. + +"What do you want, gutter-toads?" he cried, glancing up and seeing +them approach. "This ain't a hotel." + +"But it's a splendid fire," rejoined Clare, looking into his face with +a wan smile, "and we're so cold!" + +"What's that to me!" returned the man, who, savage about something, +was ready to quarrel with anything. "I didn't make my fire to warm +little devils that better had never been born!" + +"No, sir," answered Clare; "but I don't think we'd better not have +been born. We're both cold, and nobody but Tommy knows how hungry I +am; but your fire is so beautiful that, if you would let us stand +beside it a minute or two, we wouldn't at all mind." + +"Mind, indeed! Mind what, you preaching little humbug?" + +"Mind being born, sir." + +"Why do you say _sir_ to me? Don't you see I'm a working man?" + +"Yes, and that's why. I think we ought to say _sir_ and _ma'am_ to +every one that can do something we can't. Tommy and I can't make iron +do what we please, and you can, sir! It would be a grand thing for us +if we could!" + +"Oh, yes, a grand thing, no doubt!--Why?" + +"Because then we could get something to eat, and somewhere to lie +down." + +"Could you? Look at me, now! I can do the work of two men, and can't +get work for half a man!" + +"That's a sad pity!" said Clare. "I wish I had work! Then I would +bring you something to eat." + +The man did not tell them why he had not work enough--that his +drunkenness, and the bad ways to which it had brought him, with the +fact that he so often dawdled over the work that was given him, caused +people to avoid him. + +"Who said I hadn't enough to eat? I ain't come to that yet, young 'un! +What made you say that?" + +"Because when I had work, I had plenty to eat; and now that I have +nothing to do, I have nothing to eat. It's well I haven't work now, +though," added Clare with a sigh, "for I'm too tired to do any. Please +may I sit on this heap of ashes?" + +"Sit where you like, so long 's you keep out o' my way. I 'ain't got +nothing to give you but a bar of iron. I'll toast one for you if you +would like a bite." + +"No, thank you, sir," answered Clare, with a smile. "I'm afraid it +wouldn't be digestible. They say toasted cheese ain't. I wish I had a +try though!" + +"You're a comical shaver, you are!" said the blacksmith. "You'll come +to the gallows yet, if you're a good boy! Them Sunday-schools is doin' +a heap for the gallows!--That ain't your brother?" + +By this time Tommy had begun to feel at home with the blacksmith, from +whose face the cloud had lifted a little, so that he looked less +dangerous. He had edged nearer to the fire, and now stood in the light +of it. + +"No," answered Clare, with an odd doubtfulness in his tone. "I ought +to say _yes_, perhaps, for all men are my brothers; but I mean I +haven't any particular one of my very own." + +"That ain't no pity; he'd ha' been no better than you. I've a brother +I would choke any minute I got a chance." + +While they talked, the blacksmith had put his iron in the fire, and +again stood blowing the bellows, when his attention was caught by the +gestures of the little red-eyed imp, Tommy, who was making rapid signs +to him, touching his forehead with one finger, nodding mysteriously, +and pointing at Clare with the thumb of his other hand, held close to +his side. He sought to indicate thus that his companion was an +innocent, whom nobody must mind. In the blacksmith Tommy saw one of +his own sort, and the blacksmith saw neither in Tommy nor in Clare any +reason to doubt the hint given him. Not the less was he inclined to +draw out the idiot. + +"Why do you let him follow you about, if he ain't your brother?" he +said. "He ain't nice to look at!" + +"I want to make him nice," answered Clare, "and then he'll be nice to +look at. You mustn't mind him, please, sir. He's a very little boy, +and 'ain't been well brought up. His granny ain't a good woman--at +least not very, you know, Tommy!" he added apologetically. + +"She's a damned old sinner!" said Tommy stoutly. + +The man laughed. + +"Ha, ha, my chicken! you know a thing or two!" he said, as he took his +iron from the fire, and laid it again on the anvil. + +But besides the brother he would so gladly strangle, there was an +idiot one whom he had loved a little and teazed so much, that, when he +died, his conscience was moved. He felt therefore a little tender +toward the idiot before him. He bethought himself also that his job +would soon be at a stage where the fewer the witnesses the better, for +he was executing a commission for certain burglars of his +acquaintance. He would do no more that night! He had money in his +pocket, and he wanted a drink! + +"Look here, cubs!" he said; "if you 'ain't got nowhere to go to, I +don't mind if you sleep here. There ain't no bed but the bed of the +forge, nor no blankets but this leather apron: you may have them, for +you can't do them no sort of harm. I don't mind neither if you put a +shovelful of slack and a little water now and then on the fire; and if +you give it a blow or two with the bellows now and then, you won't be +stone-dead afore the mornin'!--Don't be too free with the coals, now, +and don't set the shed on fire, and take the bread out of my poor +innocent mouth. Mind what I tell you, and be good boys." + +"Thank you, sir," said Clare. "I thought you would be kind to us! I've +one friend, a bull, that's very good to me. So is Jonathan. He's a +horse. The bull's name is Nimrod. He wants to gore always, but he's +never cross with me." + +The blacksmith burst into a roar of laughter at the idiotic +speech. Then he covered the fire with coal, threw his apron over +Clare's head, and departed, locking the door of the smithy behind him. + +The boys looked at each other. Neither spoke. Tommy turned to the +bellows, and began to blow. + +"Ain't you warm yet?" said Clare, who had seen his mother careful over +the coals. + +"No, I ain't. I want a blaze." + +"Leave the fire alone. The coal is the smith's, and he told us not to +waste it." + +"He ain't no count!" said Tommy, as heartless as any grown man or +woman set on pleasure. + +"He has given us a place to be warm and sleep in! It would be a shame +to do anything he didn't like. Have you no conscience, Tommy?" + +"No," said Tommy, who did not know conscience from copper. The germ of +it no doubt lay in the God-part of him, but it lay deep. Tommy--no +worse than many a boy born of better parents--was like a hill full of +precious stones, that grows nothing but a few little dry shrubs, and +shoots out cold sharp rocks every here and there. + +"If you have no conscience," answered Clare, "one must serve for +both--as far as it will reach! Leave go of that bellows, or I'll make +you." + +Tommy let the lever go, turned his back, and wandered, in such dudgeon +as he was capable of, to the other side of the shed. + +"Hello!" he cried, "here's a door!--and it ain't locked, it's only +bolted! Let's go and see!" + +"You may if you like," answered Clare, "but if you touch anything of +the blacksmith's, I'll be down on you." + +"All right!" said Tommy, and went out to see if there was anything to +be picked up. + +Clare got on the stone hearth of the forge, and lay down in the hot +ashes, too far gone with hunger to care for the clothes that were +almost beyond caring for. He was soon fast asleep; and warmth and +sleep would do nearly as much for him as food. + + + +Chapter XX. + +Tommy reconnoitres. + + +Tommy, out in the moonlight, found himself in a waste yard, scattered +over with bits of iron, mostly old and rusty. It was not an +interesting place, for it was not likely to afford him anything to +eat. Yet, with the instinct of the human animal, he went shifting and +prying and nosing about everywhere. Presently he heard a curious +sound, which he recognized as made by a hen. More stealthily yet he +went creeping hither and thither, feeling here and feeling there, in +the hope of laying his hand on the fowl asleep. Urged by his natural +impulse to forage, he had forgotten Clare's warning. His hand did find +her, and had it been his grandmother instead of Clare in the smithy, +he would at once have broken the bird's neck before she could cry out; +but with the touch of her feathers came the thought of Clare, and by +this time he understood that what Clare said, Clare would do. + +He had some knowledge of fowls; he had heard too much talk about them +at his grandmother's not to know something of their habits; and +finding she sat so still, he concluded that under her might be +eggs. To his delight it was so. The hen belonged to a house at some +distance, and had wandered from it, in obedience to the secretive +instinct of animal maternity, strong in some hens, to seek a hidden +shelter for her offspring. This she had found in the smith's yard, +beneath the mould-board of a plough that had lain there for +years. Slipping his hand under her, Tommy found five eggs. In greedy +haste he took them, every one. + +I must do him the justice to say that his first impulse was to dart +with them to Clare. But before he had taken a step toward him, again +he remembered his threat. With the eggs inside him, he could run the +risk; he would not mind a few blows--not much; but if he took them to +Clare, the unbearable thing was, that he would assuredly give every +one of them back to the hen. He was an idiot, and Tommy was there to +look after him; but, in looking after Clare, was Tommy to neglect +himself? If Clare would not eat the eggs Tommy carried him, as most +certainly he would not, the best thing was for Tommy to eat them +himself! What a good thing that it was no use to steal for Clare! The +steal would be all for himself! Not a step from the spot did Tommy +move till he had sucked every one of the five eggs. But he made one +mistake: he threw away the shells. + +When he had sucked them, he found himself much lighter-hearted, but, +alas, nearly as hungry as before! The spirit of research began again +to move him: where were eggs, what might there not be beside? + +The moon was nearly at the full; the smith's yard was radiantly +illuminated. But even the moon could lend little enchantment to a +scene where nothing was visible but rusty, broken, deserted, +despairful pieces of old iron. Tommy lifted his eyes and looked +further. + +The enclosure was of small extent, bounded on one side by the garden +wall of the house they had just passed, and at the bottom by a broken +fence, dividing it from a piece of waste land that probably belonged +to the house. As he roamed about, Tommy spied a great heap of old iron +piled up against the wall, and made for it, in the hope of enlarging +his horizon. He scrambled to the top, and looked over. His gaze fell +right into a big but, full of dark water. Twice that evening he met +the same horror! There was a legendary report, though he had not heard +it, I fancy, that his mother drowned herself instead of him: she fell +in, and he was fished out. Whether this was the origin of his fear or +not, so far from getting down by means of the water-but, Tommy dared +not cross at that point. With much trembling he got on the top of the +wall, turned his back on the butt, and ran along like a cat, in search +of a place where he could descend into the garden. He went right to +the end, round the corner, and half-way along the bottom before he +found one. There he came to a doorway that had been solidly walled up +on the outside, while the door was left in position on the +inside--ready for use when the court of chancery should have decided +to whom the house belonged. Its frame was flush with the wall, so that +its bolts and lock afforded Tommy foothold enough to descend, and +confidence of being able to get up again. + +He landed in a moonlit wilderness--such a wilderness as a deserted +garden speedily becomes, the wealth in the soil converting it the +sooner to a savage chaos. Full of the impulse of discovery, and the +hope of presenting himself with importance to Clare as the bringer of +good tidings, Tommy forced his way through or crept under the +overgrown bushes, until he reached a mossy rather than gravelly walk, +where it was more easy to advance. It led him to the house. + +Had he been a boy of any imagination, he would have shuddered at the +thought of attempting an entrance. All the windows had outside +shutters. Those of the ground floor were closed--except one that swung +to and fro, and must have swung in many a wind since the house was +abandoned. The moon shone with a dull whitish gleam on the dusty +windows of the first and second stories, and on the great dormers that +shot out from the slope of the roof, and cast strange shadows upon +it. The door to the garden had had a porch of trellis-work, over which +jasmine and other creeping plants were trained; but whether anything +of the porch was left, no one could have told in that thicket of +creepers, interlaced and matted by antagonist forces of wind and +growth so that not a hint of door was visible. Clearly there was +nobody within. + +Tommy sought the window with the open shutter. Through the dirty +glass, and the reflection of the moon, he could see nothing. He tried +the sash, but could not stir it. He went round the corner to one end +of the house, and saw another door. But an enemy stepped between: the +moon shone suddenly up from the ground. In a hollow of the pavement +had gathered a pool from the drip of the neglected gutters, and out of +its hidden depth the staring round looked at him. It was the third +time Tommy's nerves had been shaken that night, and he could stand no +more. At the awful vision he turned and fled, fell, and rose and fled +again. It was not imagination in Tommy; it was an undefined, +inexplicable horror, that must have had a cause, but could have no +reason. Young as he was he had already more than once looked on the +face of death, and had felt no awe; he had listened to the gruesomest +of tales, told not altogether without art, and had never moved a hair +Only one material and two spiritual things had power with him; the one +material thing was hunger, the two spiritual things were a feeble love +for Clare, and a strong horror of water of any seeming depth. Now a +new element was added to this terror by the meddling of the moon in +the fiendish mystery--the secret of which must, I think, have been the +bottomless depth she gave the water. + +He rushed down the garden. With frightful hindrance from the +overgrowth, he found the prisoned door by strange perversion become a +ladder, gained by it the top of the wall, and sped along as if pursued +by an incarnate dread. Horror of horrors! all at once the moon again +looked up at him from below: he was within a yard or two of the big +water-butt! Right up to it he must go, for, close to it, on the other +side of the wall, was the heap of iron by which alone he could get +down. He tightened every nerve for the effort. He assured himself that +the thing would be over in a moment; that the water was quiet, and +could not follow him; that presently he would find himself in the +smithy by the warm forge-fire. The scaring necessity was, that he must +stoop and kneel right over the water-but, in order to send his legs in +advance down the wall to the top of the mound. It was a moment of +agony. That very moment, with an appalling unearthly cry, something +dark, something hideous, something of inconceivable ghastliness, as it +seemed to Tommy, sprang right out of the water into the air. He +tumbled from the wall among the iron, and there lay. + +The stolen eggs were avenged. The hen, feverish and unhappy from the +loss of her hope of progeny, had gone to the butt to sip a little +water. Tommy, appearing on the wall above her, startled her. She, +flying up with a screech, startled Tommy, and became her own unwitting +avenger. + + + +Chapter XXI. + +Tommy is found and found out. + + +When Clare woke from his first sleep, which he did within an hour--for +he was too hungry to sleep straight on, and the door, imperfectly +closed by Tommy, had come open, and let in a cold wind with the +moonlight--he raised himself on his elbow, and peered from his stone +shelf into the dreary hut. He could not at once tell where he was, but +when he remembered, his first thought was Tommy. He looked about for +him. Tommy was nowhere. Then he saw the open door, and remembered he +had gone out. Surely it was time he had come back! Stiff and sore, he +turned on his longitudinal axis, crept down from the forge, and went +out shivering to look for his imp. The moon shone radiant on the rusty +iron, and the glamour of her light rendered not a few of its shapes +and fragments suggestive of cruel torture. Picking his way among +spikes and corners and edges, he walked about the hideous wilderness +searching for Tommy, afraid to call for fear of attracting attention. +The hen too was walking about, disconsolate, but she took no notice of +him, neither did the sight of her give him any hint or rouse in him +the least suspicion: how could he suspect one so innocent and troubled +for the avenging genius through whom Tommy's white face lay upturned +to the white moon! Her egg-shells lay scattered, each a ghastly point +in the moonshine, each a silent witness to the deed that had been +done. Tommy scattered and forgot them; the moon gathered and noted +them. But they told Clare nothing, either of Tommy's behaviour or of +Tommy himself. + +He came at last to the heap of metal, and there lay Tommy, caught in +its skeleton protrusions. A shiver went through him when he saw the +pallid face, and the dark streak of blood across it. He concluded that +in trying to get over the wall he had failed and fallen back. He +climbed and took him in his arms. Tommy was no weight for Clare, weak +with hunger as he was, to carry to the smithy. He laid him on the +hearth, near the fire, and began to blow it up. The roaring of the +wind in the fire did not wake him. Clare went on blowing. The heat +rose and rose, and brought the boy to himself at last, in no +comfortable condition. He opened his eyes, scrambled to his feet, and +stared wildly around him. + +"Where is it?" he cried. + +"Where's what?" rejoined Clare, leaving the bellows, and taking a hold +of him lest he should fall off. + +"The head that flew out of the water-but," answered Tommy with a +shudder. + +"Have you lost your senses, Tommy?" remonstrated Clare. "I found you +lying on a heap of old iron against the wall, with the moon shining on +you." + +"Yes, yes!--the moon! She jumped out of the water-but, and got a hold +of me as I was getting down. I knew she would!" + +"I didn't think you were such a fool, Tommy!" said Clare. + +"Well, you hadn't the pluck to go yourself! You stopt in!" cried +Tommy, putting his hand to his head, but more sorely hurt that an +idiot should call him a fool. + +"Come and let me see, Tommy," said Clare. + +He wanted to find out if he was much hurt; but Tommy thought he wanted +to go to the water-but, and screamed. + +"Hold your tongue, you little idiot!" cried Clare. "You'll have all +the world coming after us! They'll think I'm murdering you!" + +Tommy restrained himself, and gradually recovering, told Clare what he +had discovered, but not what he had found. + +"There's something yellow on your jacket! What is it?" said Clare. "I +do believe--yes, it is!--you've been eating an egg! Now I remember! I +saw egg-shells, more than two or three, lying in the yard, and the +poor hen walking about looking for her eggs! You little rascal! You +pig of a boy! I won't thrash you this time, because you've fetched +your own thrashing. But--!" + +He finished the sentence by shaking his fist in Tommy's face, and +looking as black at him as he was able. + +"I do believe it was the hen herself that frighted you!" he added. +"She served you right, you thief!" + +"I didn't know there was any harm," said Tommy, pretending to sob. + +"Why didn't you bring me my share, then?" + +"'Cos I knowed you'd ha' made me give 'em back to the hen!" + +"And you didn't know there was any harm, you lying little brute!" + +"No, I didn't." + +"Now, look here, Tommy! If you don't mind what I tell you, you and I +part company. One of us two must be master, and I will, or you must +tramp. Do you hear me?" + +"I can't do without wictuals!" whimpered Tommy. "I didn't come wi' +_you_ a purpose to be starved to death!" + +"I dare say you didn't; but when I starve, you must starve too; and +when I eat, you shall have the first mouthful. What did you come with +me for?" + +"'Acos you was the strongest," answered Tommy, "an' I reckoned you +would get things from coves we met!" + +"Well, I'm not going to get things from coves we meet, except they +give them to me. But have patience, Tommy, and I'll get you all you +can eat. You must give me time, you know! I 'ain't got work yet!--Come +here. Lie down close to me, and we'll go to sleep." + +The urchin obeyed, pillowed his head on Clare's chest, and went fast +asleep. + +Clare slept too after a while, but the necessities of his relation to +Tommy were fast making a man of him. + + + +Chapter XXII. + +The smith in a rage. + + +They had not slept long, when they were roused by a hideous clamour +and rattling at the door, and thunderous blows on the wooden sides of +the shed. Clare woke first, and rubbed his eyelids, whose hinges were +rusted with sleep. He was utterly perplexed with the uproar and +romage. The cabin seemed enveloped in a hurricane of kicks, and the +air was in a tumult of howling and brawling, of threats and curses, +whose inarticulateness made them sound bestial. There never came pause +long enough for Clare to answer that they were locked in, and that the +smith must have the key in his pocket. But when Tommy came to himself, +which he generally did the instant he woke, but not so quickly this +time because of his fall, he understood at once. + +"It's the blacksmith! He's roaring drunk!" he said. + +"Let's be off, Clare! The devil 'ill be to pay when he gets in! He'll +murder us in our beds!" + +"We ought to let him into his own house if we can," replied Clare, +rising and going to the door. It was well for him that he found no way +of opening it, for every instant there came a kick against it that +threatened to throw it from lock and hinges at once. He protested his +inability, but the madman thought he was refusing to admit him, and +went into a tenfold fury, calling the boys hideous names, and swearing +he would set the shed on fire if they did not open at once. The boys +shouted, but the man had no sense to listen with, and began such a +furious battery on the door, with his whole person for a ram, that +Tommy made for the rear, and Clare followed--prudent enough, however, +in all his haste, to close the back-door behind them. + +Tommy was in front, and led the way to the bottom of the yard, and +over the fence into the waste ground, hoping to find some point in +that quarter where he could mount the wall. He could not face the +water-but--with the moon in it, staring out of the immensity of the +lower world. He ran and doubled and spied, but could find no +foothold. Least of all was ascent possible at the spot where the door +stood on the other side; the bricks were smoother than elsewhere. He +turned the corner and ran along a narrow lane, Clare still following, +for he thought Tommy knew what he was about; but Tommy could find no +encouragement to attempt scaling the wall. They might have fled into +the fields that lay around; but the burrowing instinct was strong, and +the deserted house drew them. Then Clare, finding Tommy at fault, +bethought him that the little rascal had got up by the heap on which +he discovered him, and must be afraid to go that way again. He faced +about and ran, in his turn become leader. Tommy wheeled also, and +followed, but with misgiving. When they reached the farther corner of +the bottom wall, they stopped and peeped round before they would turn +it: they might run against the blacksmith in chase of them! But the +sound of his continued hammering at the door came to them, and they +went on. They crossed the fence and ran again, ran faster, for now +every step brought them nearer to their danger: the heap of iron lay +between them and the smithy, and any moment the smith might burst into +the shed, rush through, and be out upon them. + +They reached the heap. Clare sprang up; and Tommy, urged on the one +side by the fear of the drunken smith, and drawn on the other by the +dread of being abandoned by Clare, climbed shuddering after him. + +"Mind the water-but, Clare!" he gasped; "an' gi' me a hand up." + +Clare had already turned on the top of the wall to help him. + +"Now let me go first!" said Tommy, the moment he had his foot on +it. "I know how to get down." + +He scudded along the wall, glad to have Clare between him and the +butt. Clare followed swiftly. He was not so quick on the cat-promenade +as Tommy, but he had a good head, and was spurred by the apprehension +of being seen up there in the moonlight. + + + +Chapter XXIII. + +Treasure trove. + + +In a few moments they were safe in the thicket at the foot of what had +been their enemy and was now their friend--the garden-wall. How many +things and persons there are whose other sides are altogether +friendly! These are their true selves, and we must be true to get at +them. + +Tommy again took the lead, though with a fresh sinking of the heart +because of that other place with the moon in it. Through the tangled +thicket they made or found their way--and there stood the house, with +the moon looking down on its roof, and the drunkard's thunder +troubling her still pale light--her _moon-thinking_. But for the noise +and the haste, Clare would have been frightened at them. There seemed +some secret between the house and the moon which they were determined +no one else should share. They were of one mind to terrify man or boy +who should attempt to cross the threshold! There was no time, however, +to heed such fancies. "If we could only get in without spoiling +anything!" thought Clare. Once in, they would hurt nothing, take but +the shelter and rest lying there of no good to anybody, and leave them +there all the same when they had done with them! + +While they stood looking at the house, the thundering at the door of +the smithy ceased. Presently they heard voices in altercation. One +voice was that of the smith, quieter than when last they heard it, but +ill-tempered and growling as at first. The other seemed that of a +woman. She had been able so far to quiet him, probably, that he +remembered he had the key in his pocket; for they thought they heard +the door of the smithy open. Then all was silent, and the outcasts +pursued their quest of an entrance to the house. + +Clare went ferreting as Tommy had done. He also tried to get a peep +through the window with the swinging shutter, but had no better +success than Tommy. Then he started to go round the corner next the +blacksmith's yard. + +"Look out!" cried Tommy in a loud whisper, when he saw where he was +going. + +"Why?" asked Clare. + +"Because there's a horrible hole there, full of water," answered +Tommy. + +"I'll keep a look out," returned Clare, and went. + +When he was about half-way along the end of the house, he heard a +noise he did not understand, and stopped to listen. Some one seemed +moving somewhere. + +Then came a kind of scrambling sound, and presently the noise of a +great watery splash. Clare shivered from head to foot. + +"Something has fallen into the hole Tommy mentioned!" he said to +himself, and ran on to see. A few steps brought him to what Tommy had +taken for a great hole. It was nothing but a pool of rain-water: the +splash could not have come from that! + +Then it occurred to him that the water-but could not be far off. He +forced his way through shrubs of various kinds, and reaching the wall, +went back along it until he came to the butt. A ray of moonlight showed +him that the side of it was wet, as if the water had lately come over +the edge. He looked about for some means of getting a peep into the +huge thing. It stood on a brick stand, of which it left a narrow edge +clear, but on this edge the bulge of the butt would not permit him to +mount. With the help of a small tree, however, he got on the wall, +which was better. + +Spying into the butt, he could see nothing at first, for a chimney was +now between it and the moon. A moment more, however, and he descried +something white in the dull iron gleam of the water. It was under the +water, but floating near the surface. He lay down on the wall, plunged +his arm into the butt, laid hold of it, and drew it out. It was a +little heavy for the size, for what should it be but a tiny baby, in a +flannel night-gown, which, as he drew it out, sent back little noisy +streams into the butt! It lay perfectly still in his arms, he did not +know whether dead or alive, but he thought it could hardly be drowned +so soon after the splash. It had been drugged, and the antagonism of +the two means employed to kill it was probably the saving of its life. + +Clare stood in stony bewilderment. What was he to do? Certainly not to +go after the mother! The first thing was to get it down from the +wall. That he could easily have done on the other side, by the heap; +but that was the side whence it must have been thrown, and they would +be but in worse difficulty there! He must get the baby down inside the +wall! With at least one arm occupied, the tree-way was impracticable. +There was only one other way, and that full of danger! But where there +is only one way, that way must be taken, and Clare did not hesitate. +He started along the top of the wall, with the poor unconscious germ +of humanity in his arms. He had lifted it from its watery coffin, out +of the cold arms of death, up into the clear air of life! True, that +air was cold, and filled only with moonshine; but there was the house +whose seal might be broken! and the moon saw the sun making warm the +under world! Along the narrow way, through the still, keen glimmer, +unseen, probably, by any eye in the sleeping town, he bore his burden, +speeding as fast as he dared, for he must not set a foot down amiss! + +Had any one caught sight of him, what a commotion would not the tale +have roused--of the spectre of a boy with a baby in his arms, gliding +noiseless in the moon and the middle night, along the top of the high +brick wall of a deserted house, where no one had lived within the +memory of man! + +When he reached the door-ladder, he found descent difficult but +possible. It was more difficult to make his way through the tangled +bushes without scratching the baby, which, after all, might, alas, be +beyond hurt! He held it close to his bosom, life coaxing life to "stay +a little." + +Thus laden, he appeared before Tommy, who had heard the splash, and +thought Clare had fallen into the deep hole, but had not had courage +to go and see, partly from the fear of verifying his fear, but more +from his horror of the watery abyss. He stood trembling where Clare +had left him. + +To save the baby was now Clare's only thought. The baby was now the +one thing in the universe! If only the light that shone on it were +that of the hot sun instead of the cold moon, which looked far more +like killing than bringing to life! "And," thought Clare with himself, +"there ain't much more heat in my body than in that shivery moon!" But +the sun would wake and mount the sky, and send the moon down, and all +would be different! Only, if nothing could be done in the meantime, +where would baby be by then! + +"Here, Tommy," he cried, "come and see what I found in the water-butt." + +At the word, Tommy turned to flee; but confidence in Clare, and +curiosity to see what, in Clare's arms, could hardly hurt him, +prevailed, and he drew near cautiously. + +"Lord, it's a kid!" he cried. + +"It's not a kid," said Clare, who had no slang; "it's a baby!" + +"Well! ain't a baby a kid, just?" + +Tommy did not know that the word stood for anything else than a child, +which was indeed its meaning long before it was specially applied to +the young of the goat. A _kidnapper_ or _kidnabber_ is a stealer of +children. Mr. Skeat tells us that _kid_ meant at first just a young +one. + +"You can't tell me what to do with it, I'm afraid, Tommy!" said Clare. + +Already it was as if from all eternity he had loved this helpless +little waif of Time, with its small, thin, blue-gray, gin-drugged +face; this tiny life, so hopeless, so miserable, yet so uncomplaining: +the thing that was, was the thing for it to bear; it had come into the +world to bear it! Ready to die, even Death would not have it; it must +live where it was not wanted, where it was not welcome! + +"Yes, I can!" answered Tommy with evil promptitude. "Put it in again." + +"But that would drown it, you know, Tommy!" answered Clare, treating +him like the child he was not. "We want it to live, Tommy!" + +His tenderness for the baby made him speak with foolish gentleness. + +"No, we don't!" returned Tommy. "What business has _it_ to live, when +we can't get nothing to eat?" + +Clare held faster to the baby with one arm, and with the fist of the +other struck straight out at Tommy, hit him between the eyes, and +knocked him flat. It was a miserable thing to have to do, and it made +Clare miserable, for Tommy was not half his size, and was still +suffering from his fall on the iron. But then the dying baby was not +half Tommy's size, and any milder argument would have been lost on +him: he was thus sent on the way to understand that the baby had +rights; and that if the baby could not enforce them, there was one in +the world that could and would. Never in his life did Clare show more +instinctive wisdom than in that knock-down blow to the hardly blamable +little devil! + +Tommy got up at once. He was not much hurt, for he had a hard head +though he was easily knocked over. From that moment he began to +respect Clare. He had loved him before in a way; he had patronized +him, and feared to offend him because he was stronger than he; but +until now he had had no respect for him, believing little Tommy a much +finer fellow than big Clare. There are thousands for whom a blow is a +better thing than expostulation, persuasion, or any sort of +kindness. They are such that nothing but a blow will set their door +ajar for love to get in. That is why hardships, troubles, +disappointments, and all kinds of pain and suffering, are sent to so +many of us. We are so full of ourselves, and feel so grand, that we +should never come to know what poor creatures we are, never begin to +do better, but for the knock-down blows that the loving God gives us. +We do not like them, but he does not spare us for that. + + + +Chapter XXIV. + +Justifiable burglary. + + +Tommy rose rubbing his forehead, and crying quietly. He did not dare +say a word. It was well for him he did not. Clare, perplexed and +anxious about the baby, was in no mood to accept annoyance from +Tommy. But the urchin remaining silent, the elder boy's indignation +began immediately to settle down. + +The infant lay motionless, its little heart beating doubtfully, like +the ticking of a clock off the level, as if the last beat might be +indeed the last. + +"We _must_ get into the house, Tommy!" said Clare. + +"Yes, Clare," answered Tommy, very meekly, and went off like a shot to +renew investigation at the other end of the house. He was back in a +moment, his face as radiant with success as such a face could be, with +such a craving little body under it. + +"Come, come," he cried. "We can get in quite easy. I ha' _been_ in!" + +The keen-eyed monkey had found a cellar-window, sunk a little below +the level of the ground--a long, narrow, horizontal slip, with a +grating over its small area not fastened down. He had lifted it, and +pushed open the window, which went inward on rusty hinges--so rusty +that they would not quite close again. That he had been in was a +lie. _He_ knew better than go first! He belonged to the school of +_No. 1!_--all mean beggars. + +Clare hastened after him. + +"Gi' me the kid, an' you get in; you can reach up for it better, +'cause ye're taller," said Tommy. + +"Is it much of a drop?" asked Clare. + +"Nothing much," answered Tommy. + +Clare handed him the baby, instructing him how to hold it, and +threatening him if he hurt it; then laid himself on his front, shoved +his legs across the area through the window, and followed with his +body. Holding on to the edge of the window-sill, he let his feet as +far down as he could, then dropped, and fell on a heap of coals, +whence he tumbled to the floor of the cellar. + +"You should have told me of the coals!" he said, rising, and calling +up through the darkness. + +"I forgot," answered Tommy. + +"Give me the baby," said Clare. + +When Tommy took the baby, he renewed that moment, and began to cherish +the sense of an injury done him by the poor helpless thing. He did not +pinch it, only because he dared not, lest it should cry. When he heard +Clare fall on the coals, and then heard him call up from the depth of +the cellar, he was greatly tempted to turn with it to the other end of +the house, and throw it in the pool, then make for the wall and the +fields, leaving Clare to shift for himself. But he durst not go near +the pool, and Clare would be sure to get out again and be after him! +so he stood with the hated creature in his unprotective arms. When +Clare called for it, he got into the shallow area, and pushed the baby +through the window, grasping the extreme of its garment, and letting +it hang into the darkness of the cellar, head downward. I believe then +the baby was sick, for, a moment after, and before Clare could get a +hold of it, it began to cry. The sound thrilled him with delight. + +"Oh, the darling!--Can't you let her down a bit farther, Tommy?" he +said, with suppressed eagerness. + +He had climbed on the heap of coals, and was stretching up his arms to +receive her. In the faint glimmer from the diffused light of the moon, +he could just distinguish the window, blocked up by Tommy; the baby he +could not see. + +"No, I can't," answered Tommy. "Catch! There!" + +So saying he yielded to his spite, and waiting no sign of preparedness +on the part of Clare, let go his hold, and dropped the little one. It +fell on Clare and knocked him over; but he clasped it to him as he +fell, and they hurtled to the bottom of the coals without much damage. + +"I have her!" he cried as he got up. "Now you come yourself, Tommy." + +He had known no baby but his lost sister, and thought of all babies as +girls. + +"You'll catch me, won't you, Clare?" said Tommy. + +"The thing you've done once you can do again! I can't set down the +baby to catch you!" replied the unsuspicious Clare, and turned to seek +an exit from the cellar. He had not had time yet to wonder how Tommy +had got out. + +Tommy came tumbling on the top of the coals: he dared not be left with +the water-but and the pool and the moon. + +"Where are you, Clare?" he called. + +Clare answered him from the top of the stone stair that led to the +cellar, and Tommy was soon at his heels. Going along a dark passage, +where they had to feel their way, they arrived at the kitchen. The +loose outside shutter belonged to it, and as it was open, a little of +the moonlight came in. The place looked dreary enough and cold enough +with its damp brick-floor and its rusty range; but at least they were +out of the air, and out of sight of the moon! If only they had some of +that coal alight! + +"I don't see as we're much better off!" said Tommy. "I'm as cold as +pigs' trotters!" + +"Then what must baby be like!" said Clare, whose heart was brimful of +anxiety for his charge. It seemed to him he had never known misery +till now. Life or death for the baby--and he could do nothing! He was +cold enough himself, what with hunger, and the night, and the wet and +deadly cold little body in his arms; but whatever discomfort he felt, +it seemed not himself but the baby that was feeling it; he imputed it +all to the baby, and pitied the baby for the cold he felt himself. + +"We needn't stay here, though," he said. "There must be better places +in the house! Let's try and find a bedroom!" + +"Come along!" responded Tommy. + +They left the kitchen, and went into the next room. It seemed warmer, +because it had a wooden floor. There was hardly any light in it, but +it felt empty. They went up the stair. When they turned on the landing +half-way, they saw the moon shining in. They went into the first room +they came to. Such a bedroom!--larger and grander than any at the +parsonage! + +"Oh baby! baby!" cried Clare, "now you'll live--won't you?" + +He seemed to have his own Maly an infant again in his arms. The +thought that the place was not his, and that he might get into trouble +by being there, never came to him. Use was not theft! The room and its +contents were to him as the water and the fire which even pagans +counted every man bound to hand to his neighbour. There was the bed! +Through all the cold time it had been waiting for them! The +counterpane was very dusty; and oh, such moth-eaten blankets! But +there were sheets under them, and they were quite clean, though dingy +with age! The moths--that is, their legs and wings and dried-up +bodies--flew out in clouds when they moved the blankets. Not the less +had they discovered Paradise! For the moths, they must have found it +an island of plum-cake! + +I do not know the history of the house--how it came to be shut up with +so much in it. I only know it was itself shut up in chancery, and +chancery is full of moths and dust and worms. I believe nobody in the +town knew much about it--not even the thieves. It was of course said +to be haunted, which had doubtless done something for its +protection. No one knew how long it had stood thus deserted. Nobody +thought of entering it, or was aware that there was furniture in +it. It was supposed to be somebody's property, and that it was +somebody's business to look after it: whether it was looked after or +not, nobody inquired. Happily for Clare and the baby and Tommy, that +was nobody's business. + +With deft hands--for how often had he not seen his baby-sister +undressed!--Clare hurried off the infant's one garment, gently rubbed +her little body till it was quite dry, if not very clean, and laid her +tenderly in the heart of the blankets, among the remains and eggs and +grubs of the mothy creatures--they were not wild beasts, or even +stinging things--and covered her up, leaving a little opening for her +to breathe through. She had not cried since Clare took her; she was +too feeble to cry; but, alas, there was no question about feeding her, +for he had no food to give her, were she crying ever so much! He threw +off his clothes, and got into the mothy blankets beside her. In a few +minutes he began to glow, for there was a thick pile of woolly +salvation atop of him. He took the naked baby in his arms and held her +close to his body, and they grew warmer together. + +"Now, Tommy," he said, "you may take off your clothes, and get in on +the other side of me." + +Tommy did not need a second invitation, and in a moment they were all +fast asleep. A few months, even a few days before, it would have been +a right painful thing to Clare to lie so near a boy like Tommy, but +suffering had taken the edge off nicety and put it on humanity. The +temple of the Lord may need cleansing, but the temple of the Lord it +is. Clare had in him that same spirit which made _the_ son of man go +beyond the healingly needful, and lay his hand--the Sinaitic +manuscript says his _hands_--upon the leper, where a word alone would +have served for the leprosy: the hands were for the man's +heart. Repulsive danger lay in the contact, but the flesh and bones +were human, and very cold. + + + +Chapter XXV. + +A new quest. + + +Though as comfortable as one could be who so sorely lacked food, Clare +slept lightly. His baby was heavy on his mind, and he woke very +early--woke at once to the anxious thought of a boy without food, +money, or friends, and with a hungry baby. He woke, however, with a +new train of reasoning in his mind. Babies could not work; babies +always had their food given them; therefore babies who hadn't food had +a right to ask for it; babies couldn't ask for it; therefore those who +had the charge of them, and hadn't food to give them, had a right to +do the asking for them. He could not beg for himself as long as he was +able to ask for work; but for baby it was his duty to beg, because she +could not wait: she would not live till he found work. If he got work +that very day, he would have to work the whole day before he got the +money for it, and baby would be dead by that time! He crept out, so as +not to awake the sleepers, and put on his clothes. They were not dry, +but they would dry when the sun rose. He did not at all like leaving +his baby with Tommy, but what was he to do? She might as well die of +Tommy as of hunger! Perhaps it might be easier! + +He thought over the nature of the boy, and what it would be best to +say to him. He saw what many genial persons are slow to see, that +kindness, in its natural shape, is to certain dispositions a great +barrier in the way of learning either love or duty. With multitudes, +nothing but undiluted fear or pain or shame can open the door for love +to enter. + +He searched the house for a medicine-bottle, such as he had seen +plenty of at the parsonage, and found two. He chose the smaller, lest +size should provoke disinclination. Then he woke Tommy, and said to +him, + +"Tommy, I'm going out to get baby's breakfast." + +"Ain't you going to give _me_ any? Is the kid to have _everything_?" + +"Tommy!" said Clare, with a steady look in his eyes that frightened +him, "your turn will come next. You won't die of want for a day or two +yet. I'll see to you as soon as I can. Only, remember, baby comes +first! I'm going to leave her with you. You needn't take her up. +You're not able to carry her. You would let her fall. But if, when I +come home, I find anything has happened to her, _I'll put you in the +water-butt_--I WILL. And I'll do it when the moon is in it." + +Tommy pulled a hideous face, and began to yell. Clare seized him by +the throat. + +"Make that noise again, you rascal, and I'll choke you. If you're good +to baby while I'm away, I won't eat a mouthful till you've had some; +if you're not good to her, you know what will happen! You've got the +thing in your own hands!" + +"She'll go an' do something I can't help, an' then you'll go for to +drown me!" + +Again he began to howl, but Clare checked him as before. "If you wake +her up, I'll--" He had no words, and shook him for lack of any. "I +see," he resumed, "I shall have to lock you up in the coal-cellar till +I come back! Here! come along!" + +Tommy was quiet instantly, and fell to pleading. Clare lent a gracious +ear, and yielding to Tommy's protestations, left him with his +treasure, and set out on his quest. + +He got out through the kitchen, the rustiness of the fastenings of its +door delaying him a little, and over the wall by the imprisoned door, +taking care to lift as little as possible of his person above the +coping as he crossed. He dared not go along the wall in the daylight, +or get down in the smith's yard; he dropped straight to the ground. + +The country was level, and casting his eyes about, he saw, at no great +distance, what looked like a farmstead. He knew cows were milked +early, but did not know what time it was. Hoping anyhow to reach the +place before the milk was put away in the pans, he set out to run +straight across the fields. But he soon found he could not run, and +had to drop into a walk. + +When he got into the yard, he saw a young woman carrying a foaming +pail of milk across to the dairy. He ran to her, and addressed her +with his usual "Please, ma'am;" but the pail was heavy, and she kept +on without answering him. Clare followed her, and looking into the +dairy, saw an elderly woman. + +"Please, ma'am, could you afford me as much fresh milk as would fill +that bottle?" he said, showing it. + +"Well, my man," she answered pleasantly, "I think we might venture as +far without fear of the workhouse! But what on earth made you bring +such a thimble of a bottle as that?" + +"I have no money to pay for it, you see, ma'am; and I thought a little +bottle would be better to beg with; it wouldn't be so hard on the +farmer!" + +"Bless the boy! Much good a drop of milk like that will do him!" said +the woman, turning to the girl "Is it for your mother's tea?" + +"No, ma'am; it's for a baby--a very little baby, ma'am!--I think it +will hold enough," he added, giving an anxious glance at the bottle in +his hand, "to keep her alive till I get work." + +The woman looked, and her heart was drawn to the boy who stood gazing +at her with his whole solemn, pathetic yet strong face--with his wide, +clear eyes, his decided nose, large and straight, his rather long, +fine mouth, trembling with eager anxiety, and his confident chin. She +saw hunger in his grimy cheeks; she saw that his manners were those of +a gentleman, and his clothes poor enough for any tramp, though +evidently not made for a tramp. She would have concluded him escaped +from cruel guardians, for she was a reader of _The Family Herald_; but +that would not account for the baby! The baby did not tally! + +"How old's the baby?" she asked. + +"I don't know, ma'am; she only came to us last night." + +"Who brought her?" + +She imagined the boy a simpleton, and expected one of such answers as +inconvenient questions in natural history receive from nurses. + +"I don't know, ma'am. I took her out of the water-butt." + +The thing grew bewildering. + +"Who put her there?" + +"I don't know, ma'am." + +"Whose baby is she, then?" + +"Mine, I think, ma'am." + +"God bless the boy!" said the woman impatiently, and stared at him +speechless. + +Her daughter in the meantime had filled the phial with new milk. She +handed it to him. He grasped it eagerly. Tears of joy came in his big +hungry eyes. + +"Oh, _thank_ you, ma'am!" he said. "But, please, would you tell me," +he continued, looking from the one to the other, "how much water I +must put in the milk to make it good for baby? I know it wants water, +but I don't know how much!" + +"Oh, about half and half," answered the elder woman. "'Ain't she got +no mother?" she resumed. + +"I think she must have a mother, but I daresay she's a tramp," +answered Clare. + +"I don't want to give my good milk to a tramp!" she rejoined. + +"_I_'m not a tramp, please, ma'am!--at least I wasn't till the day +before yesterday." + +The woman looked at him out of motherly eyes, and her heart swelled +into her bosom. + +"Wouldn't you like some milk yourself?" she said. + +"Oh, yes, ma'am!" answered Clare, with a deep sigh. + +She filled a big cup from the warm milk in the pail, and held it out +to him. He took it as a man on the scaffold might a reprieve from +death, half lifted it to his lips, then let his hand sink. It trembled +so, as he set the cup down on a shelf beside him, that he spilled a +little. He looked ruefully at the drops on the brick floor. + +"Please, ma'am, there's Tommy!" he faltered. + +His promise to Tommy had sprung upon him like a fiery flying serpent. + +"Tommy! I thought you said the baby was a girl?" + +"Yes, the baby's a girl; but there's Tommy as well! He's another of +us." + +"Your brother, of course!" + +"No, ma'am; I'm afraid he's a tramp. But there he is, you see, and I +must share with him!" + +It grew more and more inexplicable! + +A gruff, loud voice came from the yard. It was the farmer's. He was a +bitter-tempered man, and his dislike of tramps was almost hatred. His +wife and daughter knew that if he saw the boy he would be worse than +rude to him. + +"There's the master!" cried the mother. "Drink, and make haste out of +his way." + +"If it's stealing,--" said Clare. + +"Stealing! It's no stealing! The dairy's mine! I can give my milk +where I please!" + +"Well, ma'am, if the milk's mine because you gave it me, it's not +begging to ask you to give me a piece of bread for it! I could take a +share of that to Tommy!" + +"Run, Chris," cried the mother, hurriedly; "take the innocent with +you--round outside the yard. Give him a hunch of bread, and let him +go. For God's sake don't let your father see him! Run, my boy, run! +There's no time to drink the milk now!" + +She poured it back into the pail, and set the cup out of the way. + +There was a little passage and another door, by which they left as the +farmer entered. The kick he would have given Clare with his heavy boot +would, in its consequences, have reached the baby too. The girl ran +with him to the back of the house. + +"Wait a moment at that window," she said. + +Now whether it was loving-kindness all, or that she dared not take the +time to divide it, I cannot tell, but she handed Clare a whole loaf, +and that a good big one, of home-made bread, and disappeared before he +could thank her, telling him to run for his life. + +He was able now. With the farmer behind, and the hungry ones before +him, he _must_ run; and with the phial in his pocket and the loaf in +his hands, he _could_ run. Happily the farmer did not catch sight of +him. His wife took care he should not. I believe, indeed, she got up a +brand-new quarrel with him on the spur of the moment, that he might +not have a chance. + + + +Chapter XXVI. + +A new entrance. + + +Clare sped jubilant. But soon came a check to his jubilation: it was +one thing to drop from the wall, and quite another to climb to the top +of it without the help of the door! The same moment he heard the clink +of the smith's hammer on his anvil, and to go by his yard in daylight +would be to risk too much! For what would become of them if their +retreat was discovered! He stood at the foot of the brick precipice, +and stared up with helpless eyes and failing strength. Baby was +inside, hungry, and with no better nurse than ill conditioned Tommy; +her milk was in his pocket, Tommy's bread in his hand, the +insurmountable wall between him and them! He had the daylight now, +however, and there was hardly any one about: perhaps he could find +another entrance! Round the outside of the wall, therefore, like the +Midianite in the rather comical hymn, did Clare prowl and prowl. But +the wall rose straight and much too smooth wherever he looked. +Searching its face he went all along the bottom of the garden, and +then up the narrow lane between it and the garden of the next house, +with increasing fear that there was no way but by the smith's yard, +and no choice but risk it. + +A dozen yards or so, however, from the end of the lane, where it took +a sharp turn before entering the street, he spied an opening in the +wall--the same from which, the night before, Tommy had returned with +such a frightened face. Clare went through, and found a narrow passage +running to the left for a short distance between two walls. At the +end, half on one side, half on the other of the second wall, lay the +well that had terrified Tommy. The wall crossed it with a low arch. On +the further side of the well was a third wall, with a space of about +two feet and a half between it and the side of the round well. Through +that wall there might be a door!--or, if not, there might be some way +of getting over it! To cross the well would be awkward, but he must do +it! He tied the loaf in his pocket-handkerchief--he was far past +fastidiousness, and Tommy knew neither the word nor the thing--and +knotted the ends of it round his neck. But his chief anxiety was not +to break the bottle in his jacket-pocket. He got on his knees on the +parapet. How deep and dark the water looked! For a moment he felt a +fear of it something like Tommy's. How was he to cross the awful gulf? +It was not like a free jump; he was hemmed in before and behind, and +overhead also. But the baby drew him over the well, as the name of +Beatrice drew Dante through the fire. The baby was waiting for him, +and it had to be done! He made a cat-leap through beneath the arch, +reaching out with his hands and catching at the parapet beyond. He did +catch it, just enough of it to hold on by, so that his body did not +follow his legs into the water. Oh, how cold they found it after his +run! He held on, strained and heaved up, made a great reach across the +width of the parapet with one hand, laid hold of its outer edge, made +good his grasp on it, and drew himself out of the water, and out of +the well. + +He was in a narrow space, closed in with walls much higher than his +head, out of which he saw no way but that by which he had come +in--across the fearful well, that seemed, so dark was its water, to go +down and down for ever. + +He felt in his pocket. If then he had found baby's bottle broken, I +doubt if Clare would ever have got out of the place, except by the +door into the next world. What little strength he had was nearly gone, +and I think it would then have gone quite. But the bottle was safe and +his courage came back. + +He examined his position, and presently saw that the narrowness of his +threatened prison would make it no prison at all. He found that, by +leaning his back against one wall, pushing his feet against the +opposite wall, and making of the third wall a rack for his shoulder, +he could worm himself slowly up. It was a task for a strong man, and +Clare, though strong for his years, was not at that moment strong. But +there was the baby waiting, and here was her milk! He fell to, and, +with an agony of exertion, wriggled himself at last to the top--so +exhausted that he all but fell over on the other side. He pulled +himself together, and dropped at once into, the garden. Happier boy +than Clare was not in all England then. Hunger, wet, incipient +nakedness, for he had torn his clothes badly, were nowhere. Baby was +within his reach, and the milk within baby's! + +He ran, dripping like a spaniel, to find her, and shot up the stair to +the room that held his treasure. To his joy he found both Tommy and +the baby fast asleep, Tommy tired out with the weary tramping of the +day before, and the baby still under the influence of the opiate her +mother had given her to make her drown quietly. + + + +Chapter XXVII. + +The baby has her breakfast. + + +He waked Tommy, and showed him the loaf. Tommy sprang from his lair +and snatched at it. + +"No, Tommy," said Clare, drawing back, "I can't trust you! You would +eat it all; and if I died of hunger, what would become of baby, left +alone with you? I don't feel at all sure you wouldn't eat _her_!" + +Baby started a feeble whimper. + +"You must wait now till I've attended to her," continued Clare. "If +you had got up quietly without waking her, I would have given you your +share at once." + +As he spoke, he pulled a blanket off the bed to wrap her in, and made +haste to take her up. A series of difficulties followed, which I will +leave to the imagination of mothers and aunts, and nurses in +general--the worst being that there was no warm water to wash her in, +and cold water would be worse than dangerous after what she had gone +through with it the night before. Clare comforted himself that washing +was a thing non-essential to existence, however desirable for +well-being. + +Then came a more serious difficulty: the milk must be mixed with +water, and water as cold as Clare's legs would kill the drug-dazed +shred of humanity! What was to be done? It would be equally dangerous +to give her the strong milk of a cow undiluted. There was but one way: +he must feed her as do the pigeons. First, however, he must have +water! The well was almost inaccessible: to get to it and return would +fearfully waste life-precious time! The rain-water in the little pool +must serve the necessity! It was preferable to that in the butt! + +Until many years after, it did not occur to Clare as strange that +there should be even a drop of water in that water-butt. Whence was it +fed? There was no roof near, from which the rain might run into it. If +there had ever been a pipe to supply it, surely, in a house so long +forsaken, its continuity must have given way One always sees such +barrels empty, dry, and cracked: this one was apparently known to be +full of water, for what woman in her senses, however inferior those +senses, would throw her child into an empty butt! How did it happen to +be full? Clare was almost driven to the conclusion that it had been +filled for the evil purpose to which it was that night put. Against +this was the fact that it would not have been easy to fill such a huge +vessel by hand. I suggested that the blacksmith and his predecessors +might have used it for the purposes of the forge, and kept it and its +feeder in repair. Mr. Skymer endeavoured repeatedly to find out what +had become of the blacksmith, but never with any approach to success; +the probability being that he had left the world long before his +natural time, by disease engendered or quarrel occasioned through his +drunkenness. + +Clare laid the baby down, and fetched water from the pool. Then he +mixed the milk with what seemed the right quantity, again took the +baby up, who had been whimpering a little now and then all the time, +laid a blanket, several times folded, on his wet knees, and laid her +in her blanket upon it. These preparations made, he took a small +mouthful of the milk and water, and held it until it grew warm. It was +the only way, I condescend to remind any such reader as may think it +proper to be disgusted. When then he put his mouth to the baby's, +careful not to let too much go at once, they managed so between them +that she successfully appropriated the mouthful. It was followed by a +second, a third, and more, until, to Clare's delight, the child seemed +satisfied, leaving some of the precious fluid for another meal. He put +her in the bed again, and covered her up warm. All the time, Tommy had +been watching the loaf with the eyes of a wild beast. + +"Now, Tommy," said Clare, "how much of this loaf do you think you +ought to have?" + +"Half, of course!" answered Tommy boldly, with perfect conviction of +his fairness, and pride in the same. + +"Are you as big as I am?" + +Tommy held his peace. + +"You ain't half as big!" said Clare. + +"I'm a bloomin' lot hungrier!" growled Tommy. + +"You had eggs last night, and I had none!" + +"That wurn't my fault!" + +"What did you do to get this bread?" + +"I staid at home with baby." + +"That's true," answered Clare. "But," he went on, "suppose a horse and +a pony had got to divide their food between them, would the pony have +a right to half? Wouldn't the horse, being bigger, want more to keep +him alive than the pony?" + +"Don't know," said Tommy. + +"But you shall have the half," continued Clare; "only I hope, after +this, when you get anything given to you, you'll divide it with me. I +try to be fair, and I want you to be fair." + +Tommy made no reply. He did not trouble himself about fair play; he +wanted all he could get--like most people; though, thank God, I know a +few far more anxious to give than to receive fair play. Such men, be +they noblemen or tradesmen, I worship. + +Clare carefully divided the loaf, and after due deliberation, handed +Tommy that which seemed the bigger half. Without a word of +acknowledgment, Tommy fell upon it like a terrier. He would love Clare +in a little while when he had something more to give--but stomach +before heart with Tommy! His sort is well represented in every +rank. There are not many who can at the same time both love and be +hungry. + + + +Chapter XXVIII. + +Treachery. + + +"Now, Tommy," said Clare, having eaten his half loaf, "I'm going out +to look for work, and you must take care of baby. You're not to feed +her--you would only choke her, and waste the good milk." + +"I want to go out too," said Tommy. + +"To see what you can pick up, I suppose?" + +"That's my business." + +"I fancy it mine while you are with me. If you don't take care of baby +and be good to her, I'll put you in the water-butt I took her out +of--as sure as you ain't in it now!" + +"That you shan't!" cried Tommy; "I'll bite first!" + +"I'll tie your hands and feet, and put a stick in your mouth," said +Clare. "So you'd better mind." + +"I want to go with you!" whimpered Tommy. + +"You can't. You're to stop and look after baby. I won't be away longer +than I can help; you may be sure of that." + +With repeated injunctions to him not to leave the room, Clare went. + +Before going quite, however, he must arrange for returning. To swarm +up between the two walls as he had done before, would be to bid +good-bye to his jacket at least, and he knew how appearances were +already against him. Spying about for whatever might serve his +purpose, he caught sight of an old garden-roller, and was making for +it, when Tommy, never doubting he was gone, came whistling round the +corner of the house with his hands in his pocket-holes, and an +impudent air of independence. Clare away, he was a lord in his own +eyes! He could kill the baby when he pleased! Plainly his mood was, +"He thinks I'm going to do as he tells me! Not if I knows it!" Clare +saw him before he saw Clare, and rushed at him with a roar. + +"You thought I was gone!" he cried. "I told you not to leave the room! +Come along to the water-butt!" + +Tommy shivered when he heard him, and gave a shriek when he saw him +coming. He shook till his teeth chattered. But terror not always +paralyzes instinct in the wild animal. As Clare came running, he took +one step toward him, and dropped on the ground at his feet. Clare shot +away over his head, struck his own against a tree, and lay for a +minute stunned. Tommy's success was greater than he had hoped. He +scudded into the house, and closed and bolted the door to the kitchen. + +When Clare came to himself, he found he had a cut on his head. It +would never do to go asking for work with a bloody face! The little +pool served at once for basin and mirror, and while he washed he +thought. + +He had no inclination to punish Tommy for the trick he had played him; +he had but done after his kind! It would serve a good end too: Tommy +would imagine him lurking about to have his revenge, and would not +venture his nose out. He discovered afterward that the little wretch +had made fast the cellar-door, so that, if he had entered that way, he +would have been caught in a trap, and unable to go or return. + +He got the iron roller to the foot of the wall, where he had come over +the night before, and where now first he perceived there had once been +a door; managed, with its broken handle for a lever, to set it up on +end, filled it with earth, and heaped a mound of earth about it to +steady it, placed a few broken tiles and sherds of chimney-pots upon +it, and from this rickety perch found he could reach the top easily. + +The next thing was to arrange for getting up from the other side. For +this he threw over earth and stones and whatever rubbish came to his +hand, the sole quality required in his material being, that it should +serve to lift him any fraction of an inch higher. The space was so +narrow that his mound did not require to be sustained by the width of +its base except in one direction; everywhere else the walls kept in +the heap, and he made good speed. At length he descended by it, sure +of being able to get up again. + +He had been gone an hour before Tommy dared again leave the room where +the baby was. He had planned what to do if Clare got into it: he would +threaten, if he came a step nearer, to kill the baby! But if he had +him in the coal-cellar, he would make his own conditions! A tramp +would not keep a promise, but Clare would! and until he promised not +to touch him, he should not come out--not if he died of hunger! + +At length he could bear imprisonment no longer. He opened the +room-door with the caution of one who thought a tiger might be lying +against it. He saw no one, and crept out with half steps. By slow +degrees, interrupted by many an inroad of terror and many a swift +retreat, he got down the stair and out into the garden; whence, after +closest search, he was at length satisfied his enemy had departed. For +a time he was his own master! To one like Tommy--and such are not +rare--it is a fine thing to be his own master. But the same person who +is the master is the servant--and what a master to serve! Tommy, +however, was quite satisfied with both master and servant, for both +were himself. What was he to do? Go after something to eat, of course! +He would be back long before Clare! He had gone to look for work--and +who would give _him_ work? If Tommy were as big as Clare, lots of +people would give him work! But catch him working! Not if he knew +it!--not Tommy! + +Never till she was grown up, never, indeed, until she was a +middle-aged woman and Mr. Skymer's housekeeper, did the baby know in +what danger she was that morning, alone with surnameless Tommy. + +His first sense of relation to any creature too weak to protect +itself, was the consciousness of power to torment that creature. But +in this case the exercise of the power brought him into another +relation, one with the water-butt! He went back to the room where the +child lay in her blankets like a human chrysalis, and stood for a +moment regarding her with a hatred far from mild: was he actually +expected to give time and personal notice to that contemptible thing +lying there unable to move? _He_ wasn't a girl or an old woman! He +must go and get something to eat! that was what a man was for! Better +twist her neck at once and go! + +But he could not forget the water-butt--proximate mother of the +child. Its idea came sliding into Tommy's range, grew and grew upon +Tommy, came nearer and nearer, until the baby was nowhere, and nothing +in the world but the water-butt. His consciousness was possessed with +it. It was preparing to swallow him in its loathsome deep! All at once +it jumped back from him, and stood motionless by the side of the +wall. Now was his chance! Now he must mizzle! Not a moment longer +would he stop in the same place with the horrible thing! + +But the baby! Clare would bring him back and put him in the butt! No, +he wouldn't! What harm would come to the brat? She was not able to +roll herself off the bed! She could do nothing but go to sleep again! +Out he must and would go! He wanted something to eat! He would be in +again long before Clare could get back! + +He left the room and the house, ran down the garden, scrambled up the +door, got on the top of the wall, and dropped into the waste land +behind it--nor once thought that the only way back was by the very +jaws of the water-butt. + + + +Chapter XXIX. + +The baker. + + +Clare went over the wall and the well without a notion of what he was +going to do, except look for work. He had eaten half a loaf, and now +drew in his cap some water from the well and drank. He felt better +than any moment since leaving the farm. He was full of hope. + +All his life he had never been other than hopeful. To the human being +hope is as natural as hunger; yet how few there are that hope as they +hunger! Men are so proud of being small, that one wonders to what +pitch their conceit will have arrived by the time they are nothing at +all. They are proud that they love but a little, believe less, and +hope for nothing. Every fool prides himself on not being such a fool +as believe what would make a man of him. For dread of being taken in, +he takes himself in ridiculously. The man who keeps on trying to do +his duty, finds a brighter and brighter gleam issue, as he walks, from +the lantern of his hope. + +Clare was just breaking into a song he had heard his mother sing to +his sister, when he was checked by the sight of a long skinny mongrel +like a hairy worm, that lay cowering and shivering beside a heap of +ashes put down for the dust-cart--such a dry hopeless heap that the +famished little dog did not care to search it: some little warmth in +it, I presume, had kept him near it. Clare's own indigence made him +the more sorry for the indigent, and he felt very sorry for this +member of the family; but he had neither work nor alms to give him, +therefore strode on. The dog looked wistfully after him, as if +recognizing one of his own sort, one that would help him if he could, +but did not follow him. + +A hundred yards further, Clare came to a baker's shop. It was the +first he felt inclined to enter, and he went in. He did not know it +was the shop from whose cart Tommy had pilfered. A thin-faced, +bilious-looking, elderly man stood behind the counter. + +"Well, boy, what do you want?" he said in a low, sad, severe, but not +unkindly voice. + +"Please, sir," answered Clare, "I want something to do, and I thought +perhaps you could help me." + +"What can you do?" + +"Not much, but I can _try_ to do anything." + +"Have you ever learned to do anything?" + +"I've been working on a farm for the last six months. Before that I +went to school." + +"Why didn't you go on going to school?" + +"Because my father and mother died." + +"What was your father?" + +"A parson." + +"Why did you leave the farm?" + +"Because they didn't want me. The mistress didn't like me." + +"I dare say she had her reasons!" + +"I don't know, sir; she didn't seem to like anything I did. My mother +used to say, 'Well done, Clare!' my mistress never said 'Well done!"' + +"So the farmer sent you away?" + +"No, sir; but he boxed my ears for something--I don't now remember +what." + +"I dare say you deserved it!" + +"Perhaps I did; I don't know; he never did it before." + +"If you deserved it, you had no right to run away for that." + +The baker taught in a Sunday-school, and was a good teacher, able to +make a class mind him. + +"I didn't run away for that, sir; I ran away because he was tired of +me. I couldn't stay to make him uncomfortable! He had been very kind +to me; I fancy it was mistress made him change. I've been thinking a +good deal about it, and that's how it looks to me. I'm very sorry not +to have him or the creatures any more." + +"What creatures?" + +"The bull, and the horses, and the cows, and the pigs--all the +creatures about the farm. They were my friends. I shall see them all +again somewhere!" + +He gave a great sigh. + +"What do you mean by that?" asked the baker. + +"I hardly know what I mean," answered Clare. + +"When I'm loving anybody I always feel I shall see that person again +some time, I don't know when--somewhere, I don't know where." + +"That don't apply to the lower animals; it's nothing but a foolish +imagination," said the baker. + +"But if I love them!" suggested Clare. + +"Love a bull, or a horse, or a pig! You can't!" asserted the baker. + +"But I _do_," rejoined Clare. "I love my father and mother much more +than when they were alive!" + +"What has that to do with it?" returned the baker. + +"That I know I love my father and mother, and I know I love that +fierce bull that would always do what I told him, and that dear old +horse that was almost past work, and was always ready to do his +best.--I'm afraid they've killed him by now!" he added, with another +sigh. + +"But beasts 'ain't got souls, and you can't love them. And if you +could, that's no reason why you should see them again." + +"I _do_ love them, and perhaps they have souls!" rejoined Clare. + +"You mustn't believe that! It's quite shocking. It's nowhere in the +Bible." + +"Is everything that is not in the Bible shocking, sir?" + +"Well, I won't say that; but you're not to believe it." + +"I suppose you don't like animals, sir! Are you afraid of their going +to the same place as you when they die?" + +"I wouldn't have a boy about me that held such an unscriptural notion! +The Bible says--the spirit of a man that goeth upward, and the spirit +of a beast that goeth downward!" + +"Is that in the Bible, sir?" + +"It is," answered the baker with satisfaction, thinking he had proved +his point. + +"I'm so glad!" returned Clare. "I didn't know there was anything about +it in the Bible! Then when I die I shall only have to go down +somewhere, and look for them till I find them!" + +The baker was silenced for a moment. + +"It's flat atheism!" he cried. "Get out of my shop! What is the world +coming to!" + +Clare turned and went out. + +But though a bilious, the baker was not an unreasonable or unjust man +except when what he had been used to believe all his life was +contradicted. Clare had not yet shut the door when he repented. He was +a good man, though not quite in the secret of the universe. He vaulted +over the counter, and opened the door with such a ringing of its +appended bell as made heavy-hearted Clare turn before he heard his +voice. The long spare white figure appeared on the threshold, framed +in the doorway. + +"Hi!" it shouted. + +Clare went meekly back. + +"I've just remembered hearing--but mind I _know_ nothing, and pledge +myself to nothing----" + +He paused. + +"I didn't say I was _sure_ about it," returned Clare, thinking he +referred to the fate of the animals, "but I fear I'm to blame for not +being sure." + +"Come, come!" said the baker, with a twist of his mouth that expressed +disgust, "hold your tongue, and listen to me.--I did hear, as I was +saying, that Mr. Maidstone, down the town, had one of his errand-boys +laid up with scarlet fever. I'll take you to him, if you like. Perhaps +he'll have you,--though I can't say you look respectable!" + +"I 'ain't had much chance since I left home, sir. I had a bit of soap, +but----" + +He bethought him that he had better say nothing about his +family. Tommy had picked his pocket of the soap the night before, and +tried to eat it, and Clare had hidden it away: he wanted it to wash +the baby with as soon as he could get some warm water; but when he +went to find it to wash his own face, it was gone. He suspected Tommy, +but before long he had terrible ground for a different surmise. + +"You see, sir," he resumed, "I had other things to think of. When your +tummy's empty, you don't think about the rest of you--do you, sir?" + +The baker could not remember having ever been more than decently, +healthily hungry in his life; and here he had been rough on a +well-bred boy too hungry to wash his face! Perhaps the word _one of +these little ones_ came to him. He had some regard for him who spoke +it, though he did talk more about him on Sundays than obey him in the +days between. + +"I don't know, my boy," he answered. "Would you like a piece of +bread?" + +"I'm not much in want of it at this moment," replied Clare, "but I +should be greatly obliged if you would let me call for it by and +by. You see, sir, when a man has no work, he can't help having no +money!" + +"A man!" thought the baker. "God pity you, poor monkey!" + +He called to some one to mind the shop, removed his apron and put on a +coat, shut the door, and went down the street with Clare. + + + +Chapter XXX. + +The draper. + + +At the shop of a draper and haberdasher, where one might buy almost +anything sold, Clare's new friend stopped and walked in. He asked to +see Mr. Maidstone, and a shopman went to fetch him from behind. He +came out into the public floor. + +"I heard you were in want of a boy, sir," said the baker, who carried +himself as in the presence of a superior; and certainly fine clothes +and a gold chain and ring did what they could to make the draper +superior to the baker. + +"Hm!" said Mr. Maidstone, looking with contempt at Clare. + +"I rather liked the look of this poor boy, and ventured to bring him +on approval," continued the baker timidly. "He ain't much to look at, +I confess!" + +"Hm!" said the draper again. "He don't look promising!" + +"He don't. But I think he means performing," said the baker, with a +wan smile. + +"Donnow, I'm sure! If he 'appened to wash his face, I could tell +better!" + +Clare thought he had washed it pretty well that morning because of his +cut, though he had, to be sure, done it without soap, and had been at +rather dirty work since! + +"He says he's been too hungry to wash his face," answered the baker. + +"Didn't 'ave his 'ot water in time, I suppose!--Will you answer for +him, Mr. Ball?" + +"I can't, Mr. Maidstone--not one way or another. I simply was taken +with him. I know nothing about him." + +Here one of the shopmen came up to his master, and said, + +"I heard Mr. Ball's own man yesterday accuse this very boy of taking a +loaf from his cart." + +"Yesterday!" thought Clare; "it seems a week ago!" + +"Oh! this is the boy, is it?" said the baker. "You see I didn't know +him! All the same, I don't believe he took the loaf." + +"Indeed I didn't, sir! Another boy took it who didn't know better, and +I took it from him, and was putting it back on the cart when the man +turned round and saw me, and wouldn't listen to a word I said. But a +working-man believed me, and bought the loaf, and gave it between us." + +"A likely story!" said the draper. + +"I've heard that much," said the baker, "and I believe it. At least I +have no reason to believe my man against him, Mr. Maidstone. That same +night I discovered he had been cheating me to a merry tune. I +discharged him this morning." + +"Well, he certainly don't look a respectable boy," said the draper, +who naturally, being all surface himself, could read no deeper than +clothes; "but I'm greatly in want of one to carry out parcels, and I +don't mind if I try him. If he do steal anything, he'll be caught +within the hour!" + +"Oh, thank you, sir!" said Clare. + +"You shall have sixpence a day," Mr. Maidstone continued, "--not a +penny more till I'm sure you're an honest boy." + +"Thank you, sir," iterated Clare. "Please may I run home first? I +won't be long. I 'ain't got any other clothes, but----" + +"Hold your long tongue. Don't let me hear it wagging in my +establishment. Go and wash your face and hands." Clare turned to the +baker. + +"Please, sir," he said softly, "may I go back with you and get the +piece of bread?" + +"What! begging already!" cried Mr. Maidstone. + +"No, no, sir," interposed the baker. "I promised him a piece of +bread. He did not ask for it." + +The good man was pleased at his success, and began to regard Clare +with the favour that springs in the heart of him who has done a good +turn to another through a third. Had he helped him out of his own +pocket, he might not have been so much pleased. But there had been no +loss, and there was no risk! He had beside shown his influence with a +superior! + +"I am so much obliged to you, sir!" said Clare as they went away +together. "I cannot tell you how much!" + +He was tempted to open his heart and reveal the fact that three people +would live on the sixpence a day which the baker's kindness had +procured him, but prudence was fast coming frontward, and he saw that +no one must know that they were in that house! If it were known, they +would probably be turned out at once, which would go far to be fatal +to them as a family. For, if he had to pay for lodgings, were it no +more than the tramps paid Tommy's grandmother, sixpence a day would +not suffice for bare shelter. So he held his tongue. + +"Thank me by minding Mr. Maidstone's interests," returned his +benefactor. "If you don't do well by him, the blame will come upon +me." + +"I will be very careful, sir," answered Clare, who was too full of +honesty to think of being honest; he thought only of minding orders. + +They reached the shop; the baker gave him a small loaf, and he hurried +home with it The joy in his heart, spread over the days since he left +the farm, would have given each a fair amount of gladness. + +Taking heed that no one saw him, he darted through the passage to the +well, got across it better this time, rushed over the wall like a cat, +fell on the other side from the unsteadiness of his potsherds, rose +and hurried into the house, with the feeble wail of his baby in his +ears. + + + +Chapter XXXI. + +An addition to the family. + + +The door to the kitchen was open: Tommy must be in the garden again! +When he reached the nursery, as he called it to himself, he found the +baby as he had left her, but moaning and wailing piteously. She looked +as if she had cried till she was worn out. He threw down the clothes +to take her. A great rat sprang from the bed. On one of the tiny feet +the long thin toes were bleeding and raw. The same instant arose a +loud scampering and scuffling and squealing in the room. Clare's heart +quivered. He thought it was a whole army of rats. He was not a bit +afraid of them himself, but assuredly they were not company for baby! +Already they had smelt food in the house, and come in a swarm! What +was to be done with the little one? If he stayed at home with her, she +must die of hunger; if he left her alone, the rats would eat her! They +had begun already! Oh, that wretch, Tommy! Into the water--but he +should go! + +I hope their friends will not take it ill that, all his life after, +Clare felt less kindly disposed toward rats than toward the rest of +the creatures of God. + +But things were not nearly so bad as Clare thought: the scuffling came +from quite another cause. It suddenly ceased, and a sharp scream +followed. Clare turned with the baby in his arms. Almost at his feet, +gazing up at him, the rat hanging limp from his jaws, stood the little +castaway mongrel he had seen in the morning, his eyes flaming, and his +tail wagging with wild homage and the delight of presenting the rat to +one he would fain make his master. + +"You darling!" cried Clare, and meant the dog this time, not the +baby. The animal dropped the dead rat at his feet, and glared, and +wagged, and looked hunger incarnate, but would not touch the rat until +Clare told him to take it. Then he retired with it to a corner, and +made a rapid meal of it. + +He had seen Clare pass the second time, had doubtless noted that now +he carried a loaf, and had followed him in humble hope. Clare was too +much occupied with his own joy to perceive him, else he would +certainly have given him a little peeling or two from the outside of +the bread. But it was decreed that the dog should have the honour of +rendering the first service. Clare was not to do _all_ the +benevolences. + +What a happy day it had been for him! It was a day to be remembered +for ever! He had work! he had sixpence a day! he had had a present of +milk for the baby, and two presents of bread--one a small, and one a +large loaf! And now here was a dog! A dog was more than many meals! +The family was four now! A baby, and a dog to take care of the +baby!--It was heavenly! + +He made haste and gave his baby what milk and water was left. Then he +washed her poor torn foot, wrapped it in a pillow-case, for he would +not tear anything, and laid her in the bed. Next he cut a good big +crust from the loaf and gave it to the dog, who ate it as if the rat +were nowhere. The rest he put in a drawer. Then he washed his face and +hands--as well as he could without soap. After that, he took the dog, +talked to him a little, laid him on the bed beside the baby and talked +to him again, telling him plainly, and impressing upon him, that his +business was the care of the baby; that he must give himself up to +her; that he must watch and tend, and, if needful, fight for the +little one. When at length he left him, it was evident to Clare, by +the solemnity of the dog's face, that he understood his duty +thoroughly. + + + +Chapter XXXII. + +Shop and baby. + + +Once clear of the well and the wall, Clare set off running like a +gaze-hound. Such was the change produced in him by joy and the +satisfaction of hope, that when he entered the shop, no one at first +knew him. His face was as the face of an angel, and none the less +beautiful that it shone above ragged garments. But Mr. Maidstone, the +moment he saw him, and before he had time to recognize him, turned +from the boy with dislike. + +"What a fool the beggar looks!" he said to himself;--then aloud to one +of the young men, "Hand over that parcel of sheets.--Here, +you!--what's your name?" + +"Clare, sir." + +"I declare against it!" he rejoined, with a coarse laugh of pleasure +at his own fancied wit. "I shall call you Jack!" + +"Very well, sir!" + +"Don't you talk.--Here, Jack, take this parcel to Mrs. +Trueman's. You'll see the address on it.--And look sharp.--You can +read, can't you?" + +The people in the shop stood looking on, some pitifully, all +curiously, for the parcel was of considerable size, and linen is +heavy, while the boy looked pale and thin. But Clare was strong for +his age, and present joy made up for past want. He scarcely looked at +the parcel which the draper proceeded to lay on his shoulder, stooped +a little as he felt its weight, heaved it a little to adjust its +balance, and holding it in its place with one hand, started for the +door, which the master himself held open for him. + +"Please, sir, which way do I turn?" he asked. + +"To the left," answered Mr. Maidstone. "Ask your way as you go." + +Clare forgot that he had heard only the lady's name. Her address was +on the parcel, no doubt, but if he dropped it to look, he could not +get it up again by himself. A little way on, therefore, meeting a boy +about his own age returning from school, he asked him to be kind +enough to read the address on his back and direct him. The boy read it +aloud, but gave him false instructions for finding the place. Clare +walked and walked until the weight became almost unendurable, and at +last, though loath, concluded that the boy must have deceived him. He +asked again, but this time of a lady. She took pains not only to tell +him right, but to make him understand right: she was pleased with the +tired gentle face that looked up from beneath the heavy +burden. Perhaps she thought of the proud souls growing pure of their +pride, in Dante's _Purgatorio_. Following her directions, he needed no +further questioning to find the house. But it was hours after the +burden was gone from his shoulder before it was rid of the phantom of +its weight. + +His master rated him for having been so long, and would not permit him +to explain his delay, ordering him to hold his tongue and not answer +back; but the rest of his day's work was lighter; there was no other +heavy parcel to send out. There were so many smaller ones, however, +that, by the time they were all delivered, he had gained something +more than a general idea of how the streets lay, and was a weary wight +when, with the four-pence his master hesitated to give him on the +ground that he was doubtful of his character, he set out at last, +walking soberly enough now, to spend it at Mr. Ball's and the +milk-shop. Of the former he bought a stale three-penny loaf, and the +baker added a piece to make up the weight. Clare took this for +liberality, and returned hearty thanks, which Mr. Ball, I am sorry to +say, was not man enough to repudiate. The other penny he laid out on +milk--but oh, how inferior it was to that the farmer's wife had given +him! The milk-woman, however, not ungraciously granted him the two +matches he begged for. + +On his way to baby, he almost hoped Tommy would not return: he would +gladly be saved putting him in the water-butt! + +He forgot him again as he drew near the nursery, and for a long while +after he reached it. He found the infant and the dog lying as he had +left them. The only sign that either had moved was the strange +cleanness of the tiny gray face which Clare had not ventured to +wash. It gave indubitable evidence that the dog had been licking it +more than a little--probably every few minutes since he was left +curate in charge. + +And now Clare did with deliberation a thing for which his sensitive +conscience not unfrequently reproached him afterward. His defence was, +that he had hurt nobody, and had kept baby alive by it. Having in his +mind revolved the matter many a time that day, he got some sticks +together from the garden, and with one of the precious matches lighted +a small fire of coals that were not his own, and for which he could +merely hope one day to restore amends. But baby! Baby was more than +coals! He filled a rusty kettle with water, and while it was growing +hot on the fire, such was his fear lest the smoke should betray them, +that he ran out every other minute to see how much was coming from the +chimney. + +While the fire was busy heating the water, he was busier preparing a +bottle for baby--making a hole through the cork of a phial, putting the +broken stem of a clean tobacco pipe he had found in the street through +the hole, tying a small lump of cotton wool over the end of the +pipe-stem, and covering that with a piece of his pocket-handkerchief, +carefully washed with the brown Windsor soap, his mother's last present. +For the day held yet another gladness: in looking for a kettle he had +found the soap--which probably the rat had carried away and hidden +before finding baby. Through the pipe-stem and the wool and the +handkerchief he could without difficulty draw water, and hoped therefore +baby would succeed in drawing her supper. As soon as the water was warm +he mixed some with the milk, but not so much this time, and put the +mixture in the bottle. To his delight, the baby sucked it up splendidly. +The bottle, thought out between the heavy linen and the hard street, was +a success! Labour is not unfriendly to thought, as the annals of weaving +and shoe-making witness. + +And now at last was Clare equipped for a great attempt: he was going +to wash the baby! He was glad that disrespectful Tommy was not in the +house. With a basin of warm water and his precious piece of soap he +set about it, and taking much pains washed his treasure perfectly +clean. It was a state of bliss in which, up to that moment, I presume, +she had never been since her birth. In the process he handled her, if +not with all the skill of a nurse, yet with the tenderness of a +mother. His chief anxiety was not to hurt, more than could not be +helped, the poor little rat-eaten toes. He felt he must wash them, but +when in the process she whimpered, it went all through the calves of +his legs. When the happy but solicitous task was over, during which +the infant had shown the submission of great weakness, he wrapped her +in another blanket, and laid her down again. Soothed and comfortable, +as probably never soothed or comfortable before, she went to sleep. + +As soon as she was out of his arms, he took a piece of bread, and with +some of the hot water made a little sop for the dog, which the small +hero, whose four legs carried such a long barrel of starvation, ate +with undisguised pleasure and thankfulness. For his own supper Clare +preferred his bread dry, following it with a fine draught of water +from the well. + +Then, and not till then, returned the thought--what had Tommy done +with himself? Left to himself he was sure to go stealing! He might +have been taken in the act! Clare could hardly believe he had actually +run away from him. On the other hand, he had left the baby, and knew +that if he returned he would be put in the water-butt! He might have +come to the conclusion that he could do better without Clare, who +would not let him steal! It was clear he did not like taking his share +in the work of the family, and looking after the baby! Had he been +anything of a true boy, Clare would have taken his bread in his hand +and gone to look for him; being such as he was, he did not think it +necessary. He felt bound to do his best for him if he came back, but +he did not feel bound to leave the baby and roam the country to find a +boy with whom baby's life would be in constant danger. + + + +Chapter XXXIII. + +A bad penny. + + +Before Clare had done his thinking, darkness had fallen, and, weary to +the very bones, he threw himself on the bed beside the baby. The dog +jumped up and laid himself at his feet, as if the place had been his +from time immemorial--as it had perhaps been, according to time in +dog-land. The many pleasures of that blessed day would have kept Clare +awake had they not brought with them so much weariness. He fell fast +asleep. Tommy had not had a happy day: he had been found out in +evil-doing, had done more evil, and had all the day been in dread of +punishment. He did not foresee how ill things would go for him--did +not see that a rat had taken his place beside the baby, and that he +would not get back before Clare; but the vision of the water-butt had +often flashed upon his inner eye, and it had not been the bliss of his +solitude. He deserted his post in the hope of finding something to +eat, and had not had a mouthful of anything but spongy turnip, and +dried-up mangel-wurzel, or want-root. If he had been minding his work, +he would have had a piece of good bread--so good that he would have +wanted more of it, whereas, when he had eaten the turnip and the +beetroot, he had cause to wish he had not eaten so much! He had been +set upon by boys bigger than himself, and nearly as bad, who, not +being hungry, were in want of amusement, and had proceeded to get it +out of Tommy, just as Tommy would have got it out of the baby had he +dared. They bullied him in a way that would have been to his heart's +content, had he been the bully instead of the bullied. They made him +actually wish he had stayed with the baby--and therewith came the +thought that it was time to go home if he would get back before +Clare. As to what had taken place in the morning, he knew Clare's +forgivingness, and despised him for it. If he found the baby dead, or +anything happened to her that he could not cover with lying, it would +be time to cut and run in earnest! So the moment he could escape from +his tormenters, off went Tommy for home. But as he ran he remembered +that there was but one way into the house, and that was by the very +lip of the water-butt. + +Clare woke up suddenly--at a sound which all his life would wake him +from the deepest slumber: he thought he heard the whimpering of a +child. The baby was fast asleep. Instantly he thought of Tommy. He +seemed to see him shut out in the night, and knew at once how it was +with him: he had gone out without thinking how he was to get back, and +dared not go near the water-butt! He jumped out of bed, put on his +shoes, and in a minute or two was over the wall and walking along the +lane outside of it, to find the deserter. + +The moon was not up, and the night was dark, yet he had not looked +long before he came upon him, as near the house as he could get, +crouching against the wall. + +"Tommy!" said Clare softly. + +Tommy did not reply. The fear of the water-butt was upon him--a fear +darker than the night, an evil worse than hunger or cold--and Clare +and the water-butt were one. + +"You needn't think to hide, Tommy; I see you, you bad boy!" whispered +Clare. "After all I said, you ran away and left the baby to the rats! +They've been biting her horribly--one at least has. You can stay away +as long as you like now; I've got a better nurse. Good-night!" Tommy +gave a great howl. + +"Hold your tongue, you rascal!" cried Clare, still in a +whisper. "You'll let the police know where we are!" + +"Do let me in, Clare! I'm so 'ungry and so cold!" + +"Then I shall have to put you in the water-butt! I said I would!" + +"If you don't promise not to, I'll go straight to the police. They'll +take the brat from you, and put her in the workhouse!" + +Clare thought for a moment whether it would not be right to kill such +a traitor. His mind was full of history-tales, and, like Dante, he put +treachery in its own place, namely the deepest hell. But with the +thought came the words he had said so many times without thinking what +they meant--"Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that +trespass against us," and he saw that he was expected to forgive +Tommy. + +"Tommy, I forgive you," he said solemnly, "and will be friends with +you again; but I have said it, and I was right to say it, and into the +water-butt you must go! I can't trust your word now, and I think I +shall be able to trust it after that." + +Ere he had finished the words, Tommy lifted up his voice in a most +unearthly screech. + +Instantly Clare had him by the throat, so that he could not utter a +sound. + +"Tommy," he said, "I'm going to let you breathe again, but the moment +you make a noise, I'll choke you as I'm doing now." + +With that he relaxed his hold. But Tommy had paid no heed to what he +said, and began a second screech the moment he found passage for +it. Immediately he was choked, and after two or three attempts, +finally desisted. + +"I won't!" he said. + +"You shall, Tommy. You're going head over in the butt. We're going to +it now!" + +Tommy threw himself upon the ground and kicked, but dared not +scream. It was awful! He would drop right through into the great place +where the moon was! + +Clare threw him over his shoulder, and found him not half the weight +of the parcel of linen. Tommy would have bitten like a weasel, but he +feared Clare's terrible hands. He was on the back of Giant Despair, in +the form of one of the best boys in the world. Clare took him round +the wall, and over the fence into the blacksmith's yard. The smithy +was quite dark. + +"Please, I didn't mean to do it!" sobbed Tommy from behind him, as +Clare bore him steadily up the yard. It was all he could do to say the +words, for the thought of what they were approaching sent a scream +into his throat every time he parted his lips to speak. + +Clare stopped. + +"What didn't you mean to do?" he asked. + +"I didn't mean to leave the baby." + +"How did you do it then?" + +"I mean I didn't mean to stay away so long. I didn't know how to get +back." + +"I told you not to leave her! And you could have got back perfectly, +you little coward!" + +Tommy shuddered, and said no more. Though hanging over Clare's back he +knew presently, by his stopping, that they had come to the heap. There +was only that heap and the wall between him and the water-butt! Up and +up he felt himself slowly, shakingly carried, and was gathering his +breath for a final utterance of agony that should rouse the whole +neighbourhood, when Clare, having reached the top, seated himself upon +the wall, and Tommy restrained himself in the hope of what a parley +might bring. But he sat down only to wheel on the pivot of his spine, +as he had seen them do on the counter in the shop, and sit with his +legs alongside of the water-butt. Then he drew Tommy from his shoulder, +in spite of his clinging, and laid him across his knees; and Tommy, +divining there were words yet to be said, and hoping to get off with a +beating, which he did not mind, remained silent. + +"Your hour is come, Tommy!" said Clare. "If you scream, I will drop +you in, and hold you only by one leg. If you don't scream, I will hold +you by both legs. If you scream when I take you out, in you go again! +I do what I say, Tommy!" + +The wretched boy was nearly mad with terror. But now, much as he +feared the water, he feared yet more for the moment him in whom lay +the power of the water. Clare took him by the heels. + +"I'm sorry there's no moon, as I promised you," he said; "she won't +come up for my calling. I should have liked you to see where you were +going. But if you ain't an honest boy after this, you shall have +another chance; and next time we will wait for the moon!" + +With that he lifted Tommy's legs, holding him by the ankles, and would +have shoved his body over the edge of the butt into the water. But +Tommy clung fast to his knees. + +"Leave go, Tommy," he said, "or I'll tumble you right in." + +Tommy yielded, his will overcome by a greater fear. Clare let him hang +for a moment over the black water, and slowly lowered him. Tommy clung +to the side of the butt. Clare let go one leg, and taking hold of his +hands pulled them away. Tommy's terror would have burst in a frenzied +yell, but the same instant he was down to the neck in the water, and +lifted out again. He spluttered and gurgled and tried to scream. + +"Now, Tommy," said Clare, "don't scream, or I'll put you in again." + +But Tommy never believed anything except upon compulsion. The moment +he could, that moment he screamed, and that moment he was in the water +again. The next time he was taken out, he did not scream. Clare laid +him on the wall, and he lay still, pretending to be drowned. Clare got +up, set him on his feet in front of him, and holding him by the +collar, trotted him round the top of the wall to the door, and dropped +him into the garden. He was quiet enough now--more than +subdued--incapable even of meditating revenge. But when they entered +the nursery, the dog, taking Tommy for a worse sort of rat, made a +leap at him right off the bed, as if he would swallow him alive, and +the start and the terror of it brought him quite to himself again. + +"Quiet, Abdiel!" said Clare. + +The dog turned, jumped up on the bed, and lay down again close to the +baby. + +Clare, who, I have said, was in old days a reader of _Paradise Lost_, +had already given him the name of _Abdiel_. + +"Please, I couldn't help yelling!" said Tommy, very meekly. "I didn't +know you'd got _him_!" + +"I know you couldn't help it!" answered Clare. "What have you had to +eat to-day?" + +"Nothing but a beastly turnip and a wormy beet," said Tommy. "I'm +awful hungry." + +"You'd have had something better if you'd stuck by the baby, and not +left her to the rats!" + +"There ain't no rats," growled Tommy. + +"Will you believe your own eyes?" returned Clare, and showed him the +skin of the rat Abdiel had slain. "I've a great mind to make you eat +it!" he added, dangling it before him by the tail. + +"Shouldn't mind," said Tommy. "I've eaten a rat afore now, an' I'm +that hungry! Rats ain't bad to eat. I don't know about their skins!" + +"Here's a piece of bread for you. But you sha'n't sleep with honest +people like baby and Abdiel. You shall lie on the hearth-rug. Here's a +blanket and a pillow for you!" + +Clare covered him up warm, thatching all with a piece of loose carpet, +and he was asleep directly. + +The next day all terror of the water-butt was gone from the little +vagabond's mind. He was now, however, thoroughly afraid of Clare, and +his conceit that, though Clare was the stronger, he was the cleverer, +was put in abeyance. + + + +Chapter XXXIV. + +How things went for a time. + + +Clare's next day went much as the preceding, only that he was early at +the shop. When his dinner-hour came, he ran home, and was glad to find +Tommy and the dog mildly agreeable to each other. He had but time to +give baby some milk, and Tommy and Abdiel a bit of bread each. + +His look when he returned, a look of which he was unaware, but which +one of the girls, who had a year ago been hungry for weeks together, +could read, made her ask him what he had had for dinner. He said he +had had no dinner. + +"Why?" she asked. + +"Because there wasn't any." + +"Didn't your mother keep some for you?" + +"No; she couldn't." + +"Then what will you do?" + +"Go without," answered Clare with a smile. + +"But you've got a mother?" said the girl, rendered doubtful by his +smile. + +"Oh, yes! I've got two mothers. But their arms ain't long enough," +replied Clare. + +The girl wondered: was he an idiot, or what they called a poet? +Anyhow, she had a bun in her pocket, which she had meant to eat at +five o'clock, and she offered him that. + +"But what will you do yourself? Have you another?" asked Clare, +unready to take it. + +"No," she answered; "why shouldn't I go without as well as you?" + +"Because it won't make things any better. There will be just as much +hunger. It's only shifting it from me to you. That will leave it all +the same!" + +"No, not the same," she returned. "I've had a good dinner--as much as +I could eat; and you've had none!" + +Clare was persuaded, and ate the girl's bun with much satisfaction and +gratitude. + +When he had his wages in the evening, he spent them as before--a penny +for the baby, and fivepence at Mr. Ball's for Tommy, Abdiel, and +himself. + +Observing that he came daily, and spent all he earned, except one +penny, on bread; seeing also that the boy's cheeks, though plainly he +was in good health, were very thin, Mr. Ball wondered a little: a boy +ought to look better than that on five pennyworth of bread a day! + +They were a curious family--Clare, and Tommy, and the baby, and +Abdiel. But the only thing sad about it was, that Clare, who was the +head and the heart of it, and provided for all, should be upheld by no +human sympathy, no human gratitude; that he should be so high above +his companions that, though he never thought he was lonely, he could +not help feeling lonely. Not once did he wish himself rid of any +single member of his adopted family. It was living on his very body; +he was growing a little thinner every day; if things had gone on so, +he must before long have fallen ill; but he never thought of himself +at all, body or soul. + +He had no human sympathy or gratitude, I say, but he had both sympathy +and gratitude from Abdiel. The dog never failed to understand what +Clare wished and expected him to understand. In Clare's absence he +took on himself the protection of the establishment, and was Tommy's +superior. + +Though Tommy was of no use to earn bread, Clare did not therefore +allow him to be idle. He insisted on his keeping the place clean and +tidy, and in this respect Tommy was not quite a failure. He even made +him do some washing, though not much could be accomplished in that way +where there was so little to wash. Now that Abdiel was nurse, Tommy +had the run of the garden, and often went beyond it for an hour or two +without Clare's knowledge, but always took good care to be back before +his return. + +A bale of goods happening to be unpacked in his presence one day, +Clare begged the head-shopman, who was also a partner, for a piece of +what it was wrapped in; and he, having noted how well he worked, and +being quite aware they could not get another such boy at such wages, +gave him a large piece of the soiled canvas. Now Mrs. Person had +taught Clare to work,--as I think all boys ought to be taught, so as +not to be helpless without mother or sister,--and with the help of a +needle and some thread the friendly girl gave him, he soon made of the +packing-sheet a pair of trousers for Tommy, of a primitive but not +unserviceable cut, and a shirt for himself, of fashion more primitive +still. He managed it this way: he cut a hole in the middle of a piece +of the stuff, through which to put his head, and another hole on each +side of that, through which to put his arms, and hemmed them all +round. Then, having first hemmed the garment also, he indued it, and +let the voluminous mass arrange itself as it might, under as much of +his jacket and trousers as cohered. + +My reader may well wonder how, in what was called a respectable shop, +he could be permitted to appear in such poverty; but Mr. Maidstone +disliked the boy so much that he meant to send him away the moment he +found another to do his work, and gave orders that he should never +come up from the basement except when wanted to carry a parcel. The +fact was that his still, solemn, pure face was a haunting rebuke to +his master, although he did not in the least recognize the nature, or +this as the cause, of his dislike. + + + +Chapter XXXV. + +Clare disregards the interests of his employers. + + +Things went on for nearly a month, every one thriving but Clare. Yet +was Clare as peaceful as any, and much happier than Tommy, to whose +satisfaction adventure was needful. + +One day, a lady, attracted by a muff in the shop-window labelled with +a very low price, entered, and requested to see it. + +"We can offer you a choice from several of the sort, madam," said the +shopman. "It is one of a lot we bought cheap, but quite uninjured, +after a fire." + +"I want to see the one in the window," the lady answered. + +"I hope you will excuse me, madam," returned the shopman. "The muff is +in a position hard to reach. Besides, we must ask leave to take +anything down after the window is dressed for the day, and the master +is out. But I will bring you the same fur precisely." + +So saying, he went, and returned presently with a load of muffs and +other furs, which he threw on the counter. But the lady had heard that +"there's tricks i' the world," and persisted in demanding a sight of +the muff in the window. Being a "tall personage" and cool, she carried +her point. The muff was hooked down and brought her--not +graciously. She glanced at it, turned it over, looked inside, and +said, + +"I will take it. Please bring a bandbox for it." + +"I will, madam," said the man, and would have taken the muff. But she +held it fast, sought her purse, and laid the price on the counter. The +shopman saw that she knew what both of them were about, took up the +money, went and fetched a bandbox, put the muff in it before her eyes, +and tied it up. The lady held out her hand for it. + +"Shall I not send it for you, madam?" he said. + +"I do not live here," she answered. "I am on my way to the station." + +"Here, Jack," cried the shopman to Clare, whom he caught sight of that +moment going down to the basement, "take this bandbox, and go with the +lady to the station." + +If his transaction with the lady had pleased the man, he would not +have sent such a scarecrow to attend her, although she did not belong +to the town, and they might never see her again! The lady, on her +part, was about to insist on carrying the bandbox herself; but when +Clare came forward, and looked up smiling in her face, she was at once +aware that she might trust him. The man stood watching for the moment +when she should turn her back, that he might substitute another +bandbox for the one Clare carried; but Clare never looked at him, and +when the lady walked out of the shop, walked straight out after +her. Along the street he followed her steadily, she looking round +occasionally to see that he was behind her. + +They had gone about half-way to the station, when from a side street +came a lad whom Clare knew as one employed in the packing-room. He +carried a box exactly like that Clare had in his hand, and came softly +up behind him. Clare did not turn his head, for he did not want to +talk to him while he was attending on the lady. + +"Look spry!" he said in a whisper. "She don't twig! It's all right! +Maidstone sent me." + +Clare looked round. The lad held out his bandbox for him to take, and +his empty hand to take Clare's instead. But Clare had by this time +begun to learn a little caution. Besides, the lady's interests were in +his care, and he could be party to nothing done behind her back! He +had not time to think, but knew it his duty to stick by the +bandbox. If we have come up through the animals to be what we are, +Clare must have been a dog of a good, faithful breed, for he did right +now as by some ancient instinct. He held fast to the box, neither +slackening his pace nor uttering a word. The lad gave him a great +punch. Clare clung the harder to the box. The lady heard something, +and turned her head. The boy already had his back to her, and was +walking away, but she saw that Clare's face was flushed. + +"What is the matter?" she asked. + +"I don't rightly know, ma'am. He wanted me to give him my bandbox for +his, and said Mr. Maidstone had sent him. But I couldn't, you +know!--except he asked you first. You did pay for it--didn't you, +ma'am?" + +"Of course I did, or he wouldn't have let me take it away! But if you +don't know what it means, I do.--You haven't been in that shop long, +have you?" + +"Not quite a month, ma'am." + +"I thought so!" + +She said no more, and Clare followed in silence, wondering not a +little. When they reached the station, she took the bandbox, and +looked at the boy. He returned her gaze, his gray eyes wondering. She +searched her purse for a shilling, but, unable to find one, was not +sorry to give him a half-crown instead. + +"You had better not mention that I gave you anything?" she said. + +"I will not, ma'am, except they ask me," he answered. + +"But," he added, his face in a glow of delight, "is all this for me?" + +"To be sure," she answered. "I am much obliged to you for--carrying my +parcel. Be a honest boy whatever comes, and you will not repent it." + +"I will try, ma'am," said Clare. + +But, to speak accurately, he did not know what it was to _try_ to be +honest: he had never been tempted to be anything else, and had +scarcely had the idea of dishonesty in his mind except in relation to +Tommy. Do you say, "Then it was no merit to him"? Certainly it was +none. Who was thinking of merit? Not Clare. He is a sneak who thinks +of merit. He is a cad who can't do a gentlemanly action without +thinking himself a fine fellow! It might be a merit in many a man to +act as Clare did, but in Clare it was pure rightness--or, if you like +the word better, righteousness. + +Clare as little thought what awaited him. Had there been any truth, +any appreciation of honesty in his vulgar heart, Mr. Maidstone could +not have done as now he did. When his messenger came back with the +tale of how he had been foiled, he said nothing, but his lips grew +white. He closed them fast, and went and stood near the door. When +Clare, unsuspecting as innocent, opened it, he was met by a blow that +dazed him, and a fierce kick that sent him on his back to the +curbstone. Almost insensible, but with the impression that something +was interfering between him and his work, he returned to the door. As +he laid his hand on it, it opened a little, and his master's face, +with a hateful sneer upon it, shot into the crack, and spit in +his. Then the door shut so sharply that his fingers caught an +agonizing pinch. At last he understood: he was turned off, and his +day's wages were lost! + +What would have become of him now but for the half-crown the lady had +given him! She was not _quite_ a lady, or she would have walked out of +the shop, and declined to gain by frustrating a swindle; but she was a +good-hearted woman, and God's messenger to Clare. He bought a bigger +loaf than usual, at which, and the time of the day when he bought it, +and the half-crown presented in payment, Mr. Ball wondered; but +neither said anything--Mr. Ball from indecision, Clare from eagerness +to get home to his family. + + + +Chapter XXXVI. + +The policeman. + + +But, alas! Clare had made another enemy--the lad whose attempt to +change the bandboxes he had foiled. The fellow followed him, +lurkingly, all the way home--on the watch for fit place to pounce upon +him, and punish him for doing right when he wanted him to do wrong. He +saw him turn into the opening that led to the well, and thought now he +had him. But when he followed him in, he was not to be seen! He did +not care to cross the well, not knowing what might meet him on the +other side; but here was news to carry back! He did so; and his master +saw in them the opportunity of indulging his dislike and revenge, and +a means of invalidating whatever Clare might reveal to his discredit! + +Clare and the baby and Tommy and Abdiel had taken their supper with +satisfaction, and were all asleep. It was to them as the middle of the +night, though it was but past ten o'clock, when Abdiel all at once +jumped right up on his four legs, cocked his ears, listened, leaped +off the bed, ran to the door, and began to bark furiously. He was +suddenly blinded by the glare of a bull's-eye-lantern, and received a +kick that knocked all the bark out of him, and threw him to the other +side of the room. A huge policeman strode quietly in, sending the +glare of his bull's-eye all about the room like a vital, inquiring +glance. It discovered, one after the other, every member of the +family. So tired was Clare, however, that he did not wake until seized +by a rough hand, and at one pull dragged standing on the floor. + +"Take care of the baby!" he cried, while yet not half awake. + +"_I'll_ take care o' the baby, never fear!--an' o' you too, you young +rascal!" returned the policeman. + +He roused Tommy, who was wide awake, but pretending to be asleep, with +a gentle kick. + +"Up ye get!" he said; and Tommy got up, rubbing his ferret eyes. + +"Come along!" said the policeman. + +"Where to?" asked Clare. + +"You'll see when you get there." + +"But I can't leave baby!" + +"Baby must come along too," answered the policeman, more gently, for +he had children of his own. + +"But she has no clothes to go in!" objected Clare. + +"She must go without, then." + +"But she'll take cold!" + +"She don't run naked in the house, do she?" + +"No; she can't run yet. I keep her in a blanket. But the blanket ain't +mine; I can't take it with me." + +"You're mighty scrup'lous!" returned the policeman. "You don't mind +takin' a 'ole 'ouse an' garding, but you wouldn' think o' takin' a +blanket!--Oh, no! Honest boy _you_ are!" + +He turned sharp round, and caught Tommy taking a vigorous sight at +him. Tommy, courageous as a lion behind anybody's back, dropped on the +rug sitting. + +"We've done the house no harm," said Clare, "and I will _not_ take the +blanket. It would be stealing!" + +"Then I will take it, and be accountable for it," rejoined the man. "I +hope that will satisfy you!" + +"Certainly," answered Clare. "You are a policeman, and that makes it +all right." + +"Rouse up then, and come along. I want to get home." + +"Please, sir, wouldn't it do in the morning?" pleaded Clare. "I've no +work now, and could easily go then. That way we should all have a +sleep." + +"My eye ain't green enough," replied the policeman. "Look sharp!" + +Clare said no more, but went to the baby. With sinking but courageous +heart, he wrapped her closer in her blanket, and took her in his +arms. He could not help her crying, but she did not scream. Indeed she +never really screamed; she was not strong enough to scream. + +"Get along," said the policeman. + +Clare led the way with his bundle, sorely incommoded by the size and +weight of the wrapping blanket, the corners of which, one after the +other, would keep working from his hold, and dropping and trailing on +the ground. Behind him came Tommy, a scarecrow monkey, with +mischievous face, and greedy beads for eyes--type not unknown to the +policeman, who brought up the rear, big enough to have all their sizes +cut out of him, and yet pass for a man. Down the stair they went, and +out at the front door, which Clare for the first time saw open, and so +by the iron gate into the street. + +"Which way, please?" asked Clare, turning half round with the +question. + +"To the right, straight ahead. The likes o' you, young un, might know +the way to the lock-up without astin'!" + +Clare made no answer, but walked obedient. It was a sad +procession--comical indeed, but too sad when realized to continue +ludicrous. The thin, long-bodied, big-headed, long-haired, +long-tailed, short-legged animal that followed last, seemed to close +it with a never-ending end. + +There was no moon; nothing but the gas-lamps lighted Clare's _Via +dolorosa_. He hugged the baby and kept on, laying his cheek to hers to +comfort her, and receiving the comfort he did not seek. + +They came at last to the _lock-up_, a new building in the rear of the +town-house. There this tangle of humanity, torn from its rock and +afloat on the social sea, drifted trailing into a bare brilliant room, +and at its head, cast down but not destroyed, went heavy-laden Clare, +with so much in him, but only his misery patent to eyes too much used +to misery to reap sorrow from the sight. + +The head policeman--they called him the inspector--received the +charge, that of house-breaking, and entered it. Then they were taken +away to the lock-up--all but the faithful Abdiel, who, following, +received another of the kicks which that day rained on every member of +that epitome of the human family except the baby, who, small enough +for a mother to drown, was too small for a policeman to kick. The door +was shut upon them, and they had to rest in that grave till the +resurrection of the morning should bring them before the magistrate. + +Their quarters were worse than chilly--to all but the baby in her +blanket manifoldly wrapped about her, and in Clare's arms. Tommy would +gladly have shared that blanket, more gladly yet would have taken it +all for himself and left the baby to perish; but he had to lie on the +broad wooden bench and make the best of it, which he did by snoring +all the night. It passed drearily for Clare, who kept wide awake. He +was not anxious about the morrow; he had nothing to be ashamed of, +therefore nothing to fear; but he had baby to protect and cherish, and +he dared not go to sleep. + + + +Chapter XXXVII. + +The magistrate. + + +The dawn came at last, and soon after the dawn footsteps, but they +approached only to recede. When the door at length opened, it was but +to let a pair of eyes glance round on them, and close again. The hours +seemed to be always beginning, and never going on. But at the long +last came the big policeman. To Clare's loving eyes, how friendly he +looked! + +"Come, kids!" he said, and took them through a long passage to a room +in the town-hall, where sat a formal-looking old gentleman behind a +table. + +"Good morning, sir!" said Clare, to the astonishment of the +magistrate, who set his politeness down as impudence. + +Nor was the mistake to be wondered at; for the baby in Clare's arms +hid, with the mountain-like folds of its blanket, the greater part of +his face, and the old gentleman's eyes fell first on Tommy; and if +ever _scamp_ was written clear on a countenance, it was written clear +on Tommy's. + +"Hold your impudent tongue!" said a policeman, and gave Clare a cuff +on the head. + +"Hold, John," interposed the magistrate; "it is my part to punish, not +yours." + +"Thank you, sir," said Clare. + +"I will thank _you_, sir," returned the magistrate, "not to speak till +I put to you the questions I am about to put to you.--What is the +charge against the prisoners?" + +"Housebreaking, sir," answered the big man. + +"What! Housebreaking! Boys with a baby! House-breakers don't generally +go about with babies in their arms! Explain the thing." + +The policeman said he had received information that unlawful +possession had been taken of a building commonly known as The Haunted +House, which had been in Chancery for no one could tell how many +years. He had gone to see, and had found the accused in possession of +the best bedroom--fast asleep, surrounded by indications that they had +made themselves at home there for some time. He had brought them +along. + +The magistrate turned his eyes on Clare. + +"You hear what the policeman says?" he said. + +"Yes, sir," answered Clare. + +"Well?" + +"Sir?" + +"What have you to say to it?" + +"Nothing, sir." + +"Then you allow it is true?" + +"Yes, sir." + +"What right had you to be there?" + +"None, sir. But we had nowhere else to go, and nobody seemed to want +the place. We didn't hurt anything. We swept away a multitude of dead +moths, and killed a lot of live ones, and destroyed a whole granary of +grubs; and the dog killed a great rat." + +"What is your name?" + +"Clare--Porson," answered Clare, with a little intervening hesitation. + +"You are not quite sure?" + +"Yes; that is my name; but I have another older one that I don't +know." + +"A bad answer! The name you go by is not your own! Hum! Is that boy +your brother?" + +"No, sir." + +"Your cousin?" + +"No, sir; he's not any relation of mine. He's a tramp." + +"And what are you?" + +"Something like one now, sir, but I wasn't always." + +"What were you?" + +"Not much, sir. I didn't _do_ anything till just lately." + +He could not bear at the moment to talk of his be-loved dead. He felt +as if the old gentleman would be rude to them. + +"Is the infant there your sister?" + +"She's my sister the big way: God made her. She's not my sister any +other way." + +"How does she come to be with you then?" + +"I took her out of the water-butt. Some one threw her in, and I heard +the splash, and went and got her out." + +"Why did you not take her to the police?" + +"I never thought of that. It was all I could do to keep her alive. I +couldn't have done it if we hadn't got into the house." + +"How long ago is that?" + +"Nearly a month, sir." + +"And you've kept her there ever since?" + +"Yes, sir--as well as I could. I had only sixpence a day." + +"And what's that boy's name?" + +"Tommy, sir.--I don't know any other." + +"Nice respectable company you keep for one who has evidently been well +brought up!" + +"Baby's quite respectable, sir!" + +"Hum!" + +"And for Tommy, if I didn't keep him, he would steal. I'm teaching him +not to steal." + +"What woman have you got with you?" + +"Baby's the only woman we've got, sir." + +"But who attends to her?" + +"I do, sir. She only wants washing and rolling round in the blanket; +she's got no clothes to speak of. When I'm away, Tommy and Abdiel take +care of her." + +"Abdiel! Who on earth is that? Where is he?" said the magistrate, +looking round for some fourth member of the incomprehensible family. + +"He's not on earth, sir; he's in heaven--the good angel, you know, +sir, that left Satan and came back again to God." + +"You must take him to the county-asylum, James!" said the magistrate, +turning to the tall policeman. + +"Oh, he's all right, sir!" said James. + +"Please, sir," interrupted Clare eagerly, "I didn't mean the dog was +in heaven yet. I meant the angel I named him after!" + +"They _had_ a little dog with them, sir!" + +"Yes--Abdiel. He wanted to be a prisoner too, but they wouldn't let +him in. He's a good dog--better than Tommy." + +"So! like all the rest of you, you can keep a dog!" + +"He followed me home because he hadn't anybody to love," said +Clare. "He don't have much to eat, but he's content. He would eat +three times as much if I could give it him; but he never complains." + +"Have you work of any sort?" + +"I had till yesterday, sir." + +"Where?" + +"At Mr. Maidstone's shop." + +"What wages had you?" + +"Sixpence a day." + +"And you lived, all three of you, on that?" + +"Yes; all four of us, sir." + +"What do you do at the shop?" + +"Please your worship," interposed policeman James, "he was sent about +his business yesterday." + +"Yes," rejoined Clare, who did not understand the phrase, "I was sent +with a lady to carry her bandbox to the station." + +"And when you came back, you was turned away, wasn't you?" said James. + +"Yes, sir." + +"What had you done?" asked the magistrate. + +"I don't quite know, sir." + +"A likely story!" + +Clare made no reply. + +"Answer me directly." + +"Please, sir, you told me not to speak unless you asked me a +question." + +"I said, 'A likely story!' which meant, 'Do you expect me to believe +that?'" + +"Of course I do, sir." + +"Why?" + +"Because it is true." + +"How am I to believe that?" + +"I don't know, sir. I only know I've got to speak the truth. It's the +person who hears it that's got to believe it, ain't it, sir?" + +"You've got to prove it." + +"I don't think so, sir; I never was told so; I was only told I must +speak the truth; I never was told I must prove what I said.--I've been +several times disbelieved, I know." + +"I should think so indeed!" + +"It was by people who did not know me." + +"Never by people who did know you?" + +"I think not, sir. I never was by the people at home." + +"Ah! you could not read what they were thinking!" + +"Were you not believed when you were at home, sir?" + +The magistrate's doubt of Clare had its source in the fact that, +although now he was more careful to speak the truth than are most +people, it was not his habit when a boy, and he had suffered severely +in consequence. He was annoyed, therefore, at his question, set him +down as a hypocritical, boastful prig, and was seized with a strong +desire to shame him. + +"I remand the prisoner for more evidence. Take the children to the +workhouse," he said. + +Tommy gave a sudden full-sized howl. He had heard no good of the +workhouse. + +"The baby is mine!" pleaded Clare. + +"Are you the father of it?" said the big policeman. + +"Yes, I think so: I saved her life.--She would have been drowned if I +hadn't looked for her when I heard the splash!" reasoned Clare, his +face drawn with grief and the struggle to keep from crying. + +"She's not yours," said the magistrate. "She belongs to the +parish. Take her away, James." + +The big policeman came up to take her. Clare would have held her +tight, but was afraid of hurting her. He did draw back from the +outstretched hands, however, while he put a question or two. + +"Please, sir, will the parish be good to her?" he asked. + +"Much better than you." + +"Will it let me go and see her?" he asked again, with an outbreaking +sob. + +"You can't go anywhere till you're out of this," answered the big +policeman, and, not ungently, took the baby from him. + +"And when will that be, please?" asked Clare, with his empty arms +still held out. + +"That depends on his worship there." + +"Hold your tongue, James," said the magistrate. "Take the boy away, +John." + +"Please, sir, where am I going to?" asked Clare. + +"To prison, till we find out about you." + +"Please, sir, I didn't mean to steal her. I didn't know the parish +wanted her!" + +"Take the boy away, I tell you!" cried the magistrate angrily. "His +tongue goes like the hopper of a mill!" + +James, carrying the baby on one arm, was already pushing Tommy before +him by the neck. Tommy howled, and rubbed his red eyes with what was +left him of cuffs, but did not attempt resistance. + +"Please, don't let anybody hold her upside down, policeman!" cried +Clare. "She doesn't like it!--Oh, baby! baby!" + +John tightened his grasp on his arm, and hurried him away in another +direction. + +Where the big policeman issued with his charge, there was Abdiel +hovering about as if his spring were wound up so tight that it +wouldn't go off. How he came to be at that door, I cannot imagine. + +When he spied Tommy, he rushed at him. Tommy gave him a kick that +rolled him over. + +"Don't want _you_, you mangy beast!" he said, and tried to kick him +again. + +Abdiel kept away from him after that, but followed the party to the +workhouse, where also, to his disgust, plainly expressed, he was +refused admittance. He returned to the entrance by which Clare had +vanished from his eyes the night before, and lay down there. I suspect +he had an approximate canine theory of the whole matter. He knew at +least that Clare had gone in with the others at that door; that he had +not come out with them at the other door; that, therefore, in all +probability, he was within that door still. + +The police made inquiry at Mr. Maidstone's shop. Reasons for his +dismissal were there given involving no accusation: there was little +desire in that quarter to have the matter searched into. There was +therefore nothing to the discredit of the boy, beyond his running to +earth in the neglected house like a wild animal. After three days he +was set at liberty. + +As the big policeman led the way to the door to send him out, Clare +addressed him thus: + +"Please, Mr. James, may I go back to the house for a little while?" + +"Well, you _are_ an innocent!" said James; "--or," he added, "the +biggest little humbug ever I see!--No, it's not likely!" + +"I only wanted," explained Clare, "to set things straight a bit. The +house is cleaner than it was, _I_ know, but it is not in such good +order as when we went into it. I don't like to leave it worse than we +found it." + +"Never you heed," said James, believing him perfectly before he knew +what he was about. "The house don't belong to nobody, so far as ever I +heerd, an' the things'll rot all the same wherever they stand." + +"But I should like," persisted Clare. + +"I couldn't do it off my own hook, an' his worship would think you +only wanted to steal something. The best thing you can do is to leave +the place at once, an' go where nobody knows nothing agin you." + +Thought Clare with himself, "If the house doesn't belong to anybody, +why wouldn't they let me stay in it?" + +But the policeman opened the door, and as he was turning to say +good-bye to him, gave him a little shove, and closed it behind him. + + + +Chapter XXXVIII. + +The workhouse. + + +He went into the street with a white face and a dazed look--not from +any hardship he had experienced during his confinement, for he had +been in what to him was clover, but because he had lost the baby and +Abdiel, and because his mind had been all the time in perplexity with +regard to the proceedings of justice: he did not and could not see +that he had done anything wrong. Throughout his life it never mattered +much to Clare to be accused of anything wrong, but it did trouble him, +this time at least, to be punished for doing what was right. He took +it very quietly, however. + +Indignation may be a sign of innocence, but it is no necessary +consequence of innocence any more than it is a proof of +righteousness. A man will be fiercely indignant at an accusation that +happens to be false, who did the very thing last week, and is ready to +do it again. Indignation against wrong to another even, is no proof of +a genuine love of fair play. Clare hardly resented anything done to +himself. His inward unconscious purity held him up, and made him look +events in the face with an eye that was single and therefore at once +forgiving and fearless. The man who has no mote in his own eye cannot +be knocked down by the beam in his neighbour's; while he who is busy +with the mote in his neighbour's may stumble to destruction over the +beam in his own. + +White and dazed as he came out, the moment he stepped across the +threshold, Clare met the comfort of God waiting for him. His eyes +blinded with the great light, for it was a glorious morning in the +beginning of June, he found himself assailed in unknightly fashion +below the knee: there, to his unspeakable delight, was Abdiel, +clinging to him with his fore-legs, and wagging his tail as if, like +the lizards for terror, he would shake it off for gladness! What a +blessed little pendulum was Abdiel's tail! It went by that weight of +the clock of the universe called devotion. It was the escapement of +that delight which is of the essence of existence, and which, when God +has set right "our disordered clocks," will be its very consciousness. + +Clare stood for a moment and looked about him. The needle of his +compass went round and round. It had no north. He could not go back to +the shop; he could not go back to the house; baby was in the +workhouse, but he could not stay there even if they would let him! +Neither could he stop in the town; the policeman said he must go away! +Where was he to go? There was not in the world one place for him +better than another! But they would let him see baby before he +went!--and off he set to find the workhouse. + +Abdiel followed quietly at his heel, for his master walked lost in +thought, and Abdiel was too hungry to make merry without his +notice. Clare, fresh to the world, had been a great reader for one so +young, and could encounter new experience with old knowledge. In his +mind stood a pile of fir-cones, and dried sticks, and old olive wood, +which the merest touch of experience would set in a blaze of practical +conclusion. But the workhouse was so near that his reflections before +he reached it amounted only to this--that there are worse places than +a prison when you have done nothing to deserve being put in it. A +palace may be one of them. You get enough to eat in a prison; in a +palace you do not; you get too much! + +The porter at the workhouse informed him it was not the day for seeing +the inmates; but the tall policeman had given Clare a hint, and he +requested to see the matron. After much demur and much entreaty, the +man went and told the matron. She, knowing the story of the baby, +wanted to see Clare, and was so much pleased with his manners and +looks, that his sad clothes pleaded for and not against him. She took +him at once to the room where the baby was with many more, telling him +he must prove she was his by picking her out. It was not wonderful +that Clare, who knew the faces of animals so well, should know his own +baby the moment he saw her, notwithstanding that she was decently +clothed, and had already improved in appearance. But the nurses +declared they had never before seen a man, not to say a boy, who could +tell one baby from another. + +"Why," rejoined Clare, "my dog Abdiel could pick out the baby he was +nurse to!" + +"Ah, but he's a dog!" + +"And I'm a boy!" said Clare. + +He descried her on the lap of an old woman, seeming to him very old, +who was at the head of the nursery-department. Old as she was, +however, she had a keen eye, and a handsome countenance, with a +quantity of white hair. Unlike the rest of the women, though not far +removed from them socially, she knew several languages, so far as to +read and enjoy books in them. Now and then a great woman may be found +in a workhouse, like a first folio of Shakspere on a bookstall, +among--oh, such companions! + +"Let me take her," said Clare modestly, holding out his hands for the +baby. + +"Are you sure you will not let her drop?" + +"Why, ma'am," answered Clare, "she's my own baby! It was I took her +out of the water-butt! I washed and fed her every day!--not that I +could do it so well as you, ma'am!" + +She gave him the baby, and watched him with the eye of a seeress, for +she had a wonderful insight into character, and that is one of the +roots of prophecy. + +"You are a good and true lad," she said at length, "and a hard success +lies before you. I don't know what you will come to, but, with those +eyes, and that forehead, and those hands, if you come to anything but +good, you will be terribly to blame." + +"I will try to be good, ma'am," said Clare simply. "But I wish I knew +what they put me in prison for!" + +"What, indeed, my lamb!" she returned; and her eyes flashed with +indignation under the cornice of her white hair. "They'll be put in +prison one day themselves that did it!" + +"Oh, I don't mind!" said Clare. "I don't want them to be punished. You +see I'm only waiting!" + +"What are you waiting for, sonny?" asked the old woman. + +"I don't exactly know--though I know better than what I was put in +prison for. Nobody ever told me anything, but I'm always waiting for +something." + +"The something will come, child. You will have what you want! Only go +on as you're doing, and you'll be a great man one day." + +"I don't want to be a great man," answered Clare; "I'm only waiting +till what is coming does come." + +The woman cast down her eyes, and seemed lost in thought. Clare +dandled the baby gently in his arms, and talked loving nonsense to +her. + +"Well," said the old woman, raising at length her eyes, with a look of +reverence in them, to Clare's, "I can't help you, and you want no help +of mine. I've got no money, but--" + +"I've got plenty of money, ma'am," interrupted Clare. "I've got a +whole shilling in my pocket!" + +"Bless the holy innocent!" murmured the woman. "--Well, I can only +promise you this--that as long as I live, the baby sha'n't forget you; +and I ain't so old as I look." + +Here the matron came up, and said he had better be going now; but if +he came back any day after a month, he should see the baby again. + +"Thank you, ma'am," replied Clare. "Keep her a good baby, please. I +will come for her one day." + +"Please God I live to see that day!" said the old woman. "I think I +shall." + +She did live to see it, though I cannot tell that part of the story +now. + + + +Chapter XXXIX. + +Away. + + +So Clare went once more into the street, where Abdiel was again +watching for him, and stood on the pavement, not knowing which way to +turn. The big policeman had told him that no one there would give him +work after what had happened; and now, therefore, he was only waiting +for a direction to present itself. In a moment it occurred to him +that, having come in at one end of the town, he had better go out at +the other. He followed the suggestion, and Abdiel followed him--his +head hanging and his tail also, for the joy of recovering his master +had used up all the remnant of wag there was in his clock. He had no +more frolic or scamper in him now than when Clare first saw him. How +the poor thing had subsisted during the last few days, it were hard to +tell. It was much that he had escaped death from ill-usage. Meanest of +wretches are the boys or men that turn like grim death upon the +helpless. Except they change their way, helplessness will overtake +them like a thief, and they will look for some one to deliver them and +find none. Traitors to those whom it is their duty to protect, they +will one day find themselves in yet more pitiful plight than ever were +they. But I fear they will not believe it before their fate has them +by the throat. + +Clare saw that the dog was famished. He stopped at a butcher's and +bought him a scrap of meat for a penny. Then he had elevenpence with +which to begin the world afresh, and was not hungry. + +Out on the highway they went, in a perfect English summer day, with +all the world before them. It was not an oyster for Clare to open with +sword, pen, or _sesame_; but he might find a place on the outside of +it for all that, and a way over it into a better--one that he _could_ +open and get at the heart of. The sun shone as on the day of the +earthquake--deep in Clare's dimmest memorial cavern;--shone as if he +knew, come what might, that all was well; that if he shone his heart +out and went dark, nothing would go wrong; while, for the present, +everything depended on his shining his glorious best. + +"Come along, Abdiel," said Clare; "we're going to see what comes +next. At the worst, you know what hunger is, doggie, and that a good +deal of it can be borne pretty well--though I'm not fond of it any +more than you, doggie! We'll not beg till we're downright forced, and +we won't steal. When that's the next thing, we'll just sit down, wag +our tails, and die.--There!" + +He gave him the last piece of his meat, and they trudged on for some +time without speaking. + +The sun was very hot, for it was past noon an hour or two, when they +came to a public-house, with a pump before it, and a trough. Clare +grew very thirsty when he saw the pump, and imagined the rush of a +thick sparkling curve from its spout. But its handle was locked with a +chain, to keep men and women from having water instead of beer. He +went with longing to the trough, but the water in it was so unclean +that, thirsty as he was, he could not look on it even as a last +resource. He walked into the house. + +"Please, ma'am," he said to the woman at the bar, "would you allow me +to pump myself a little water to drink?" + +"You think I've got nothing to do but serve tramps with water!" she +answered, throwing back her head till her nostrils were at right +angles with the horizon. + +"I'm not a tramp, ma'am," said Clare. + +"Show me your money, then, for a pot of beer, like other honest folk." + +"I'm afraid I told you wrong, ma'am," returned Clare. "I'm afraid I +_am_ a tramp after all; only _I_'m looking for work, and most tramps +ain't, I fancy." + +"They all _say_ they are," answered the woman. "That's your story, and +that's theirs!" + +"I've got elevenpence, ma'am; and could, I dare say, buy a pot of +beer, though I don't know the price of one; but I don't see where I'm +going to get any more money, and what we have must serve Abdiel and me +till we do." + +"What right have _you_ to a dog, when you ain't fit to pay your penny +for a half-pint o' beer?" + +"Don't be hard on the young 'un, mis'ess; he don't look a bad sort!" +said a man who stood by with a pewter pot in his hand. + +Clare wondered why he had his cord-trousers pulled up a few inches and +tied under his knees with a string, which made little bags of them +there. He had to think for a mile after they left the public-house +before he discovered that it was to keep them from tightening on his +knees when he stooped, and so incommoding him at his work. + +"Thank you, sir," he said. "I'm not a bad sort. I didn't know it was +any harm to ask for water. It ain't begging, is it, sir?" + +"Not as I knows on," replied the man. "Here, take the lot!" + +He offered Clare his nearly emptied pewter. + +"No, thank you, sir," answered Clara "I am thirsty--but not so thirsty +as to take your drink from you. I can get on to the next pump. Perhaps +that won't be chained up like a bull!" + +"Here, mis'ess!" cried the man. "This is a mate as knows a neighbour +when he sees him. I'll stand him a half-pint. There's yer money!" + +Without a word the woman flung the man's penny in the till, and drew +Clare a half-pint of porter. Clare took it eagerly, turned to the man, +said, "I thank you, sir, and wish your good health," and drained the +pewter mug. He had never before tasted beer, or indeed any drink +stronger than tea, and he did not like it. But he thanked his +benefactor again, and went back to the trough. + +"Dogs don't drink beer," he said to himself. "They know better!" and +lifting Abdiel he held him over the trough. Abdiel was not so +fastidious as his master, and lapped eagerly. Then they pursued their +uncertain way. + +Ready to do anything, he thought the shabbiness of his clothes would +be a greater bar to indoor than to outdoor work, and applied therefore +at every farm they came to. But he did not look so able as he was, and +boys were not much wanted. He never pitied himself, and never +entreated: to beg for work was beggary, and to beggary he would not +descend until driven by approaching death. But now and then some +tender-hearted woman, oftener one of ripe years, struck with his +look--its endurance, perhaps, or its weariness mingled with +hope--would perceive the necessity of the boy, and offer him the food +he did not ask--nor like him the less that, never doubting what came +to one was for both, he gave the first share of it to Abdiel. + + + +Chapter XL. + +Maly. + + +Travelling on in vague hope, meeting with kindness enough to keep him +alive, but getting no employment, sleeping in what shelter he could +find, and never missing the shelter he could not find, for the weather +was exceptionally warm for the warm season, he came one day to a +village where the strangest and hardest experience he ever encountered +awaited him. What part of the country he was in, or what was the name +of the village, he did not know. He seldom asked a question, seldom +uttered word beyond a polite greeting, but kept trudging on and on, as +if the goal of his expectation were ever drawing nigher. He felt no +curiosity as to the names of the places he passed through. Why should +the names of towns and villages strung on a road to nowhere in +particular, interest him? He did, however, long afterward, come to +know the name of this village, and its topographical relations: the +place itself was branded on his brain. + +He entered it in the glow of a hot noon, and had walked nearly through +it without meeting any one, for it was the dinner-hour, and savoury +odours filled the air, when a little girl came from a neat house, and +ran farther down the street. He was very tired, very dusty, had eaten +nothing that day, had begun to despair of work, and was wishing +himself clear of the houses that he might throw himself down. But +something in the look of the child made him quicken his weary step as +he followed her. He overtook her, passed her, and saw her face. +Heavens! it was Maly, grown wonderfully bigger! He turned and caught +her up in his arms. She gave a screech of terror, and he set her down +in keenest dismay. Finding that he was not going to run away with her, +she did not run farther from him than to safe parleying distance. + +"You bad boy!" she cried; "you're not to touch me! I will tell mamma!" + +"Why, Maly! don't you know me?" + +"No, I don't You are a dirty boy!" + +"But, Maly!--" + +"My name is not Maly; it's Mary; and I don't know you." + +"Have you forgotten Clare, Maly?--Clare that used to carry you about +all day long?" + +"Yes; I have forgotten you. You're a dirty, ragged beggar-boy! You're +a bad boy! Boys with holes in their clothes are bad boys.--Nursie told +me so, and she knows everything! She told me herself she knew +everything!" + +She gave another though milder scream: involuntarily, Clare had taken +a step toward her, with his hand in his pocket, searching, as in the +old days when she cried, for something to give her. But, alas, his +pockets were now as empty as his stomach! there was _nothing_ in +them--not even a crumb saved from a scanty meal! While he was yet +searching, the little child, his heart's love--if indeed it was +she--stooped, gathered a handful of dust, and threw it at him. The big +boy burst into tears. The child mocked him for a minute, and when +Clare looked up again, drying his eyes with a rag, she was gone. + +He felt no resentment; love, old memories, his strange gentleness, and +pity for Maly and Maly's mother, saved him from it. The child was big +and plump and rosy, but oh, how fallen from his little Maly! And, her +child grown such, the mother was poor indeed, though up in the dome of +the angels! If she did not know the change in her, it was the worse, +for she could not help! Clare, like most of my readers, had not yet +learned to trust God for everything. But he was true to +Maly. Miserable over her backsliding, he said to himself that evil +counsellors were more to blame than she. + +"Did she know me at all?" he pondered; "or has she forgot me +altogether?" + +He began to doubt whether the girl was really Maly, or one very like +her. About half an hour after, he met a poor woman with a bundle on +her bowed back, who gave him a piece of bread. When he had eaten that, +he began to doubt whether he had met any little girl. He remembered +that he had often come to himself, as he wandered along the road, to +find he had been lost in fancies of old scenes or imaginary new ones; +waked up, he did not at once realize himself a poor lad on the tramp +for work he could not find: his conceptions were for a time stronger +than the things around him. He was thereupon comforted with the hope +that he had not in reality seen Maly, but had imagined the whole +affair. How was it possible, though, that he should imagine such +horrible things of his little sister? On the other hand, was it not +more possible for a fainting brain to imagine such a misery, than for +the live child to behave in such a fashion? Every day for many days he +tormented himself with like reasonings; but by degrees the occurrence, +whether fancy or fact, receded, and he grew more conscious of +tramping, tramping along. He grew also more hopeless of getting work, +but not more doubtful that everything was right. For he knew of +nothing he had done to bring these things upon him. + +His quiet content never left him. At the worst pinch of hunger and +cold, he never fell into despair. I do not know what merit he had in +this, for he was constituted more hopeful and placid than I ever knew +another. What he had merit in was, that not for a hungry boy's most +powerful temptation, something to eat, would he even imagine himself +doing what must not be done. He would not lead himself into +temptation. Thus he pleased the Power--let me rather say, ten times +more truly--the Father from whom he came. + + + +Chapter XLI. + +The caravans. + + +Within a fortnight or so after the police had dismissed him, blowing +him loose on the world like a dandelion-seed in the wind, Clare had an +adventure which not only gave him pleasure, but led to work and food +and interest in life. + +Passing one day from a cross-country road into the highway, he came +straight on the flank of a travelling menagerie. It was one of some +size, and Clare saw at a glance that its horses were in fair +condition. The front part of the little procession had already gone +by, and an elephant was passing at the moment with a caravan--of +feline creatures, as Clare afterwards learned, behind him. He drew it +with absolute ease, but his head seemed to be dragged earthward by the +weight of his trunk, as he plodded wearily along. A world of delight +woke in the heart of the boy. He had read much about strange beasts, +but had never seen one. His impulse was to run straight to the +elephant, and tell him he loved him. For he was a live beast, and +Clare loved every creature, common or strange, wild or tame, ordinary +or wonderful. But prudent thought followed, and he saw it better to +hover around, in the hope of a chance of being useful. Oh, the +treasures of wonder and knowledge on the other side of those thin +walls of wood, so slowly drawn along the dusty highway! If but for a +moment he might gaze on their living marvels! He had no money, but +things came to him without money--not so plentifully as he could +sometimes wish--but they came, and so might this! Employment among +those animals would be well worth the long hungry waiting! This might +be the very work he had been looking for without knowing it! It was +for this, perhaps, he had been kept so long waiting--till the caravans +should come along the road, and he be at the corner as they passed! He +did not know how often a man may think thus and see it come to +nothing--because there is better yet behind, for which more waiting is +wanted. + +At the end of the procession came a bear, shuffling along +uncomfortably. It went to Clare's heart to see how far from +comfortable the poor beast appeared. "What a life it would be," he +thought, "to have all the creatures in all those caravans to make +happy! That would be a life worth living!" + +It was a worthy ambition--infinitely higher than that of boys who want +to do something great, or clever, or strong. As to those who want to +be rich--for their ambition I have an utter contempt. How gladly would +I drive that meanness out of any boy's heart! To fall in with the work +of the glad creator, and help him in it--that is the only ambition +worth having. It may not look a grand thing to do it in a caravan, but +it takes the mind of Christ to do it anywhere. + +Behind the bear, closing the procession, came a stoutish, +good-tempered-looking man, in a small spring-cart, drawn by a small +pony: he was the earthly owner of that caged life, with all its +gathered discomforts. Clare lifted his cap as he passed him--a +politeness of which the man took no notice, because the boy was +ragged. The moment he was past, Clare fell in behind as one of the +procession. He was prudent enough, however, not to go so near as to +look intrusive. + +When he had followed thus for a mile or two, he saw, by signs patent +to every wanderer, that they were coming near a town. Before reaching +it, however, they arrived at a spot where the hedges receded from the +road, leaving a little green sward on the sides of it, and there the +long line came to a halt. + +The menagerie had, the day before, been exhibited at a fair, and was +now on its way to another, to be held the next day in the town they +were approaching: they had made the halt in order to prepare their +entrance. To let a part of their treasure be seen, was the best way to +rouse desire after what was yet hidden: they were going, therefore, to +take out an animal or two more to walk in parade. Clare sat down at a +little distance, and wondered what was coming next. + +Experience of tramps had made the men suspicious, and it may be they +disliked having their proceedings watched by anybody; but, happily for +Clare, it was the master himself who came up to him, not without +something of menace in his bearing. The boy was never afraid, and hope +started up full grown as the man approached. He rose and took off his +cap--a very ready action with Clare, which sprung from pure +politeness, and from nothing either selfish or cringing. But the man +put his own interpretation on the civility. + +"What are you hanging about here for?" he said rudely. + +Now Clare had a perfect right to answer, had he so pleased, that he +was on the king's highway, where no one had a right to interfere with +him. But he had the habit--he could not help it; it was natural to +him--of thinking first of the other party's side of a question--a rare +gift, which served him better than he knew. For the other may be in +the right, and it is an ugly thing to interfere with any man's right; +while a man's own rights are never so much good to him as when he +waives them. + +"I beg your pardon, sir," he said; "I did not understand you wished to +be alone. I never thought you would mind me. Will it be far enough if +I go just out of sight, for I am very tired? It is pleasant, besides, +to know there are friends near!" + +The man recognized in Clare the modes and speech of a gentleman; and +having, in the course of his wandering life, seen and known a good +many strange things, he suspected under the rags a history. But he was +not interested enough to stop and inquire into it. + +"Never mind," he said, in altered tone; "I see you're after no +mischief!" and with that walked away, leaving Clare to do as he +pleased. + +A few minutes more went by. Clare sat hungry and sleepy on the grass +by the roadside. Before he knew, he was on his feet, startled by a +terrible noise. The lion had opened his great jaws, and his brown +leathery sides, working like a pair of bellows, had sent from his +throat a huge blast, half roar, half howl. When Clare came to himself +he knew, though he had never heard it before, that the fearful sound +was the voice of the lion. He did not know that all it meant was, that +his majesty had thought of his dinner. It was not indeed much more +than an audible gape. He stood for a moment, not at all terrified, but +half expecting to see a huge yellow animal burst out of one of the +caravans--he could not guess which: the roar was much too loud to +indicate one rather than another. He sat down again, but was not any +longer inclined to sleep. For a time, however, no second roar came +from the ribs of the captive monarch. + + + +Chapter XLII. + +Nimrod. + + +That there had been a fair not far off will partly account for what +follows. As Clare sat resting, which was all he could do, with sleep +fled and food nowhere, a roar of a different kind invaded his ears. It +came along the road this time, not from the caravans. He looked, and +spied what would have brought the heart into the throat of many a +grown man. Away on the road, in the direction whence the menagerie had +come, he saw a cloud of dust and a confused struggle, presently +resolved into two men, each at the end of a rope, and an animal +between them attached to the ropes by a ring in his nose. It was a +bull, in terrible excitement, bounding this way and that, dragging and +driving the men--doing his best in fact to break away, now from the +one of them, now from the other, and now from both at once. It must +have tortured him to pull those strong men by the cartilage of his +nose, but he was in too great a rage to feel it much. Every other +moment his hoofs would be higher than his head, and again hoofs and +head and horns would be scraping the ground in a fruitless rush to +send one of his tormentors into space beyond the ken of bulls. With +swift divergence, like a scenting hound, he twisted and shot his huge +body. The question between men and bull seemed one of endurance. + +The pale-faced boy, though full of interest in the strife, yet having +had no food that day, was not in sufficient spirits to run and meet +the animal whirlwind, so as to watch closer its chances; but the +struggle came at length near enough for him to follow almost every +detail of it: he could see the bloody foam drip from the poor beast's +nostrils. When about fifty yards away, the bull, by a sudden twist, +wrenched the rope from the hands of one of the men. He fell on his +back. The other dropped his rope and fled. The bull came scouring down +the highway. + +A second roar, as of muffled thunder, issued from the leathery flanks +of the lion. The bull made a sudden stop, scoring up the ground with +his hoofs. It seemed as if in full career he started back. Then down +went his head, and like a black flash, its accompanying thunder a +bellow of defiant contempt and wrath, he charged one of the +caravans. He had taken the hungry lion's roar for a challenge to +combat. It was nothing to the bull that the voice was that of an +unknown monster; he was ready for whatever the monster might prove. + +The men busy about the caravans and wagons, caught sight of him +coming, and in the first moment of terror at a beast to which they +were not accustomed, bolted for refuge behind or upon them: they would +sooner have encountered their tiger broke loose. The same moment, with +astounding shock, the head of the bull went crack against the near +hind-wheel of the caravan in whose shafts stood the elephant, +patiently waiting orders. The bull had not caught sight of the +elephant, or he would doubtless have "gone for" him, not the +caravan. His ear, finer than Clare's, must have distinguished whence +the roar proceeded: in that caravan, sure enough, was the lion, with +the rest of the great cats. He answered the blow of the bull's head +with a roar thunderously different from his late sleepy leonine +sigh. It roused every creature in the menagerie. From the greatest to +the smallest each took up its cry. Out burst a tornado of terrific +sound, filling with horror the quiet noontide. The roaring and yelling +of lion, tiger, and leopard, the laughter of hyena, the howling of +jackal, and the snarling of bear, mingled in hideous dissonance with +the cries of monkeys and parrots; while certain strange gurgles made +Clare's heart, lover of animals though he was, quiver, and his blood +creep. The same instant, however, he woke to the sense that he might +do something: he ran to the caravans. + +By this time the men, master and all, fully roused to the far worse +that might follow the attack of the bull, had caught up what weapons +were at hand, and rushed to repel the animal For more than one or two +of them it might have proved a fatal encounter, but that the enraged +beast had entangled his horns in the spokes and rim of the wheel. In +terror of what might be approaching him from behind, he was struggling +wildly to extricate them. Peril upon peril! What if in the contortions +of his mighty muscles he pulled off the wheel, and the carriage +toppled over, every cage in it so twisted and wrenched that the +bearings of its iron bars gave way! The results were too terrible to +ponder! This way and that, and every way at once, he was writhing and +pushing and prising and dragging. The elephant turned the shafts +slowly round to see what was the matter behind. If the bull and the +elephant yoked to the caravan came to loggerheads, ruin was +inevitable. The master thought whether he had not better loose the +elephant while the bull was yet entangled by the horns. With one blow +of his trunk he would break the ruffian's back and end the affray! It +were good even, if one knew how, to loose the wicked-looking horns: +the brute's struggles to free them were more dangerous far than could +be the horns themselves! + +While he hesitated, Clare came running up, with Abdiel at his heels +ready as any hornet to fly at bull or elephant, let his master only +speak the word. But the moment Clare saw how the bull's horns were +mixed up with the spokes and fellies of the wheel, a glad suspicion +flashed across him: that was old Nimrod's way! could it be Nimrod +himself? If it were, the trouble was as good as over! The suspicion +became a certainty the instant it woke. But never could Clare +altogether forgive himself for not at first sight recognizing his old +friend. I believe myself that hunger was to blame, and not Clare. + +The men stood about the animal, uncertain what to do, as he struggled +with his horns, and heaved and tore at the wheel to get them out of +it, the roars and howls and inarticulate curses going on all the +time. The elephant must have been tired, to stand so and do nothing! +For a moment Clare could not get near enough. He was afraid to call +him while the bull could not see him: Nimrod might but struggle the +more, in order to get to him! + +Up rushed a fellow, white with rage and running, bang into the middle +of the spectators, and shook the knot of them asunder. It was one of +the two men from whom Nimrod had broken. He had a pitchfork in his +hands which he proceeded to level. Clare flung his weight against him, +threw up his fork, shoved him aside, and got close to the maddened +animal. It was his past come again! How often had he not interfered to +protect Nimrod--and his would-be masters also! With instinctive, +unconscious authority, he held up his hand to the little crowd. + +"Leave him alone," he cried. "I know him; I can manage him! Please do +not interfere. He is an old friend of mine." + +They saw that the bull was already still: he had recognized the boy's +voice! They kept his furious attendant back, and looked on in anxious +hope while Clare went up to the animal. + +"Nimrod!" he whispered, laying a hand on one of the creature's horns, +and his cheek against his neck. + +Nimrod stood like a bull in bronze. + +"I'm going to get your horns out, Nimrod," murmured Clare, and laid +hold of the other with a firm grasp. "You must let me do as I like, +you know, Nimrod!" + +His voice evidently soothed the bull. + +By the horns Clare turned his head now one way, now another, Nimrod +not once resisting push or pull. In a moment more he would have them +clear, for one of them was already free. Holding on to the latter, +Clare turned to the bystanders. + +"You mustn't touch him," he said, "or I won't answer for him. And you +mustn't let either of those men there"--for the second of Nimrod's +attendants had by this time come up--"interfere with him or me. They +let him go because they couldn't manage him. He can't bear them; and +if he were to break loose from them again, it might be quite another +affair! Then he might distrust me!" + +The menagerie men turned, and looking saw that the man with the +pitchfork had revenge in his heart. They gave him to understand that +he must mind what he was about, or it would be the worse for him. The +man scowled and said nothing. + +Clare gently released the other horn, but kept his hold of the first, +moving the creature's head by it, this way and that. A moment more and +he turned his face to the company, which had scattered a little. When +the inflamed eyes of Nimrod came into view, they scattered wider. +Clare still made the bull feel his hand on his horn, and kept speaking +to him gently and lovingly. Nimrod eyed his enemies, for such plainly +he counted them, as if he wished he were a lion that he might eat as +well as kill them. At the same time he seemed to regard them with +triumph, saying in his big heart, "Ha! ha! you did not know what a +friend I had! Here he is, come in the nick of time! I thought he +would!" Clare proceeded to untie the ropes from the ring in his +nose. The man with the pitchfork interfered. + +"That wonnot do!" he said, and laid his hand on Clare's arm. "Would +you send him ramping over the country, and never a hold to have on +him?" + +"It wasn't much good when you had a hold on him--was it now?" returned +the boy. "Where do you want to take him?" + +"That's my business," answered the man sulkily. + +"I fancy you'll find it's mine!" returned Clare. "But there he is! +Take him." + +The man hesitated. + +"Then leave me to manage him," said Clare. + +A murmur of approbation arose. The caravan people felt he knew what he +was saying. They believed he had power with the bull. + +While yet he was untying the first of the ropes from the animal's +bleeding nostrils, Clare's fingers all at once refused further +obedience, his eyes grew dim, and he fell senseless at the bull's +feet. + +"Don't tell Nimrod!" he murmured as he fell. + +"Oh, that explains it!" cried the man with the pitchfork to his +mate. "He knows the cursed brute!" For Clare had hitherto spoken his +name to the bull as if it were a secret between them. + +Neither had the sense to perceive that the explanation lay in the +bull's knowing Clare, not in Clare's knowing the bull. They made haste +to lay hold of the ropes. Nimrod stood motionless, looking down on his +friend, now and then snuffing at the pale face, which the +thorough-bred mongrel, Abdiel, kept licking continuously. Noses of +bull and dog met without offence on the loved human countenance. But +had the men let the bull feel the ropes, that moment he would have +been raging like a demon. + +The men of the caravan, admiring both Clare's influence over the +animal and his management of him, grateful also for what he had done +for them, hastened to his help. When they had got him to take a little +brandy, he sat up with a wan smile, but presently fell sideways on his +elbow, and so to the ground again. + +"It's nothing," he murmured; "it's only I'm rather hungry." + +"Poor boy!" said a woman, who had followed her brandy from the +house-caravan, afraid it might disappear in occult directions, "when +did you have your last feed?" + +She stood looking down on the white face, almost between the fore-feet +of the bull. + +"I had a piece of bread yesterday afternoon, ma'am," faltered Clare, +trying to look up at her. + +"Bless my soul!" she cried, "who's been a murderin' of you, child?" + +She thought he was in company with the two men; and they had been +ill-treating him. + +"I can't get any work, ma'am, so I don't want much to eat. Now I think +of it, I believe it was the gladness of seeing an old friend again, +and not the hunger, that made me feel so queer all at once." + +"Where's your friend?" she asked, looking round the assembly. + +"There he is!" answered Clare, putting up his hand, and stroking the +big nose that was right over his face. + +"Couldn't you rise now?" said the woman, after a moment's silent +regard of him. + +"I'll try, ma'am; I don't feel quite sure." + +"I want you to come into the house, and have a good square meal." + +"If you would be so kind, ma'am, as let me have a bit of bread here! +Nimrod would not like me to leave him. He loves me, ma'am, and if I +went away, he might be troublesome. Those men will never do anything +with him: he doesn't like them! They've been rough to him, I don't +doubt. Not that I wonder at that, for he is a terrible beast to most +people. They used to say he never was good with anybody but me. I +suppose he knew I cared for him!" + +His eyes closed again. The woman made haste to get him something. In a +few minutes she returned with a basin of broth. He took it eagerly, +but with a look of gratitude that went to her heart Before he tasted +it, however, he set it on the ground, broke in half the great piece of +bread she had brought with it, and gave the larger part to his +dog. Then he ate the other with his broth, and felt better than for +many a day. Some of the men said he could not be very hungry to give a +cur like that so much of his dinner; but the evil thought did not +enter the mind of the woman. + +"You'd better be taking your beast away," said the woman, who by this +time understood the affair, to the two men. + +They were silent, evidently disinclined for such another tussle. + +"You'd better be going," she said again. "If anything should happen +with that animal of yours, and one of ours was to get loose, the devil +would be to pay, and who'd do it?" + +"They'd better wait for me, ma'am," said Clare, rising. "I'm just +ready!--They won't tell me where they want to take him, but it's all +one, so long as I'm with him. He's my friend!--Ain't you, Nimrod? +We'll go together--won't we, Nimrod?" + +While he spoke, he undid the ropes from the ring in the bull's +nose. Gathering them up, he handed them politely to one of the men, +and the next moment sprang upon the bull's back, just behind his +shoulders, and leaning forward, stroked his horns and neck. + +"Give me up the dog, please," he said. + +The owner of the menagerie himself did as Clare requested. All stood +and stared, half expecting to see him flung from the creature's back, +and trampled under his hoofs. Even Nimrod, however, would not easily +have unseated Clare, who could ride anything he had ever tried, and +had tried everything strong enough to carry him, from a pig +upward. But Nimrod was far from wishing to unseat his friend, who with +hands and legs began to send him toward the road. + +"Are you going that way?" he asked, pointing. The men answered him +with a nod, sulky still. + +"Don't go with those men," said the woman, coming up to the side of +the bull, and speaking in a low voice. "I don't like the look of +them." + +"Nimrod will be on my side, ma'am," answered Clare. "They would never +have got him home without me. They don't understand their +fellow-creatures." + +"I'm afraid you understand your fellow-creatures, as you call them, +better than you do your own kind!" + +"I think they are my own kind, ma'am. That is how they know me, and do +what I want them to do." + +"Stay with us," said the woman coaxingly, still speaking low. "You'll +have plenty of your fellow-creatures about you then!" + +"Thank you, ma'am, a thousand times!" answered Clare, his face +beaming; "but I couldn't leave poor Nimrod to do those men a mischief, +and be killed for it!" + +"You'd have plenty to eat and drink, and som'at for your pocket!" +persisted the woman. + +"I know I should have everything I wanted!" answered Clare, "and I'm +very thankful to you, ma'am. But you see there's always something, +somehow, that's got to be done before the other thing!" + +Here the master came up. He had himself been thinking the boy would be +a great acquisition, and guessed what his wife was about; but he was +afraid she might promise too much for services that ought to be had +cheap. Few scruple to take advantage of the misfortune of another to +get his service cheap. It is the economy of hell. + +"I sha'n't feel safe till that bull of yours is a mile off!" he said. + +"Come along, Nimrod!" answered Clare, always ready with the responsive +deed. + +Away went Nimrod, gentle as a lamb. + + + +Chapter XLIII. + +Across country. + + +The two men came after at their ease. No sooner was Nimrod on the +road, however, than he began to quicken his pace. He quickened it +fast, and within a minute or so was trotting swiftly along. The men +ran panting and shouting behind. The more they shouted, the faster +Nimrod went. Ere long he was out of their sight, though Clare could +hear them cursing and calling for a time. + +He had endeavoured to stop Nimrod, but the bull seemed to have made up +his mind that he had obeyed enough for one day. He did not heed a word +Clare said to him, but kept on and on at a swinging trot. Clare would +have jumped off had he been sure the proceeding would stop him; but, +now that he would not obey him, he feared lest, in doing so, he might +let him loose on the country, when there was no saying what mischief +he might not work. On the other hand, he felt sure that he could +restrain him from violence, though he might not prevent his +frolicking. He must therefore keep his seat. + +For a few miles Nimrod was content with the highway, now trotting +beautifully, now breaking into a canter. But all at once he turned at +right angles in the middle of the road, cleared the skirting fence +like a hunter, and took a bee-line across the fields. Compelled +sometimes to abandon it, he showed great judgment in choosing the +place at which to get out of the enclosure, or cross the natural +obstruction. On and on he went, over hedge after hedge, through field +after field, until Clare began to wonder where all the people in the +world had got to. Then a strange feeling gradually came over +him. Surely at some time or other he had seen the meadow he was +crossing! Was he asleep, and dreaming the jolly ride he was having on +Nimrod's back? What a strong creature Nimrod was! Would he never be +tired? How oddly he felt! Were his senses going from him? It was like +the strangest mixture of a bad dream and a good! + +There seemed at length no further room for doubt or +mistake. Everything was in its place! It was plain why Nimrod was so +obstinate! The dear old fellow was carrying him back to where they had +been together so many happy days! They were nigh Mr. Goodenough's +farm, and making straight for it! How strange it was! he had felt +himself a measureless distance from it! But in his wandering he had +taken many turns he did not heed, and Nimrod had come the shortest +way. Delight filled his heart at the thought of seeing once more the +places where his father and mother seemed yet to live. But instantly +came the thought of Maly, and drowned the other thought in +bitterness. Then he felt how worthless place is, when those who made +it dear are gone. Father and mother are home--not the house we were +born in! + +They were soon upon the farm where once he had abundance of labour, +abundance to eat, and abundance of lowly friendship. Nimrod was making +for his old stable. He was weary now, and breathing heavily, though +not at all spent. Was he dreaming of a golden age, in which Clare +should be ever at his beck and call? + +Clare had little inclination to encounter any of the people of the +farm. He would indeed have been glad, from a little way off, to get a +sight of his once friend and master, the farmer himself; and very +gladly would he have gone into the stable in the hope of a greeting +from old Jonathan; but he would not willingly meet "the mistress!" +Nimrod should take him to his old stall; there he would tie him up, +and flee from the place! The evening was now come, and in the dusk he +would escape unseen. + +When they reached Nimrod's door, they found it closed; and Clare, +stiff enough by this time, slipped off to open it. Nimrod began to paw +the stones, and blow angry puffs from his wounded nose. When Clare got +the door open, he saw, to his confusion, a vague dark bulk, another +bull, in Nimrod's stall! The roar that simultaneously burst from each +was ferocious, and down went Nimrod's head to charge. It was a +terrible moment for Clare: the new bull was fast by the head, and, +unable to turn it to his adversary, would be gored to death almost in +a moment! He could not let Nimrod be guilty of such unfairness! And +the mistress would think he had brought him back for the very purpose! +He all but jumped on the horns of his friend, making him yield just +ground enough for the shutting of the door. He knew well, however, +that not three such doors in one would keep Nimrod from an enemy. With +his back to it he stood facing him and talking to him, and all the +while they heard the bull inside struggling to get free. He stood +between two horned rages, only a chain and a plank betwixt him and the +one at his back, with which he had no influence. A coward would have +escaped, and left the two bullies to settle between them which had the +better right to the stall--not without blood, almost as certainly not +without loss of life, perhaps human as well as bovine. But Clare was +made of other stuff. + +Before he could get Nimrod away, the bellowing brought out the +farmer. All his men had gone to the village; only himself and his wife +were at home. + +"What's got the brute?" he cried on the threshold, but instantly began +to run, for he saw through the gathering darkness a darker shape he +knew, roaring and pawing at the door of his old quarters, and a boy +standing between him and it, with marvellous courage in mortal danger. +He understood at once that Nimrod had broken loose and come back. But +when he came near enough to recognize Clare, astonishment, and +something more sacred than astonishment, held him dumb. Ever since the +unjust blow that sent the boy from him, his heart had been aware of a +little hollow of remorse in it. Now all his former relations with him +while his adoptive father yet lived, came back upon him. He remembered +him dressed like the little gentleman he always was--and there he +stood, the same gentle fearless creature, in absolute rags! If his +wife saw him! The farmer had no fear of Nimrod in his worst rages, but +he feared his wife in her gentlest moods. Happily for both, a critical +moment in the cooking of the supper had arrived. + +"Clare!" he stammered. + +"Yes, sir," returned Clare, and laid hold of Nimrod's horn. The animal +yielded, and turned away with him. The farmer came nearer, and put his +arm round the boy's neck. The boy rubbed his cheek against the arm. + +"I'm sorry I struck you, Clare!" faltered the big man. + +"Oh, never mind, sir! That was long ago!" answered the boy. + +"Tell me how you've been getting on." + +"Pretty well, sir! But I want to tell you first how it is I'm here +with Nimrod. Only it would be better to put him somewhere before I +begin." + +"It would," agreed the farmer; and between them, with the enticements +of a pail of water and some fresh-cut grass, they got him into a shed, +where they hoped he would forget the proximity of the usurper, and, +with the soothing help of his supper, go to sleep. + +Then Clare told his story. Mr Goodenough afterward asseverated that, +if he had not known him for a boy that would not lie, he would not +have believed the half of it. + +"Come, Abdiel!" said Clare, the moment he ended--and would have +started at once. + +"Won't you have something after your long ride?" said the farmer. + +Clare looked down at his clothes, and laughed. The farmer knew what he +meant, and did not ask him into the house. + +"When had you anything to eat?" he inquired. + +"I shall do very well till to-morrow," answered Clare. + +"Then if you will go, I'm glad of the opportunity of paying you the +wages I owed you," said the farmer, putting his hand in his pocket. + +"You gave me my food! That was all I was worth!" protested Clare. + +"You were worth more than that! I knew the difference when I had +another boy in your place! I wish I had you again!--But it wouldn't +do, you know! it wouldn't do!" he added hastily. + +With that he succeeded in pulling a sovereign from the depth of a +trowser-pocket, and held it out to Clare. It was neither large wages +nor a greatly generous gift, but it seemed to the boy wealth +enormous. He could not help holding out his hand, but he was ashamed +to open it. What the giver regarded as a debt, the receiver regarded +as a gift. He stood with his hand out but clenched. There was a combat +inside him. + +"It's too much!" he protested, looking at the sovereign almost with +fear. "I never had so much money in my life!" + +"You earned it well," said the farmer magnanimously. + +The moral cramp forsook his hand. He took the money with a hearty +"Thank you, sir." As he put it in his pocket, he felt its corners +carefully, lest there should be a hole. But his pockets had not had +half the wear of the clothes they inhabited. + +"Where are you going?" asked the farmer. + +Clare mentioned the small town in whose neighbourhood he had left the +caravans, and said he thought the people of the menagerie would like +him to help them with the beasts. The farmer shook his head. + +"It's not a respectable occupation!" he remarked. + +Clare did not understand him. + +"Do they cheat?" he asked. + +"No; I don't suppose they cheat worse than anybody else. But it ain't +respectable." + +Had he known a little more, Clare might have asserted that the men +about the menagerie were at least as respectable as almost any farmer +with a horse to sell. But he knew next to nothing of wickedness, +whence many a man whose skull he had brains enough to fill three +times, regarded him as a simpleton. + +Clare thought everything honest honourable. When people said +otherwise, he did not understand, and continued to act according as he +understood. A thousand dishonourable things are done, and largely +approved, which Clare would not have touched with one of his fingers: +he could see nothing more dishonourable in having to do with wild +beasts than in having to do with tame ones. If any boy wants to know +the sort of thing I count in that thousand, I answer him--"The next +thing you are asked to do, or are inclined to do--if you have any +doubt about it, DON'T DO IT." That is the way to know the honourable +thing from the dishonourable. + +Clare made no attempt to argue the question with the farmer. He +inquired of him the nearest way to the town, and went--the quicker +that he heard the voice of Mrs. Goodenough, calling her husband to +supper. + + + +Chapter XLIV. + +A third mother. + + +Who ever had a sovereign for the first time in his life, and did not +feel rich? Clare trudged along merrily, and Abdiel shared his +joy. They had to sleep out of doors nevertheless; for by this time +Clare knew that a boy, especially a boy in rags, must mind whom he +asks to change a sovereign. In the lee of a hay-mow, on a little loose +hay, they slept, Abdiel in Clare's bosom, and slept well. + +There was not much temptation to lie long after waking, and the +companions were early on their way. It was yet morning when they came +to the public house where Clare had his first and last half-pint of +beer. The landlady stood at the newly opened door, with her fists in +her sides, looking out on the fresh world, lost in some such thought +as was possible to her. Clare pulled off his cap, and bade her good +morning as he passed. Perhaps she knew she did not deserve politeness; +anyhow she took Clare's for impudence, and came swooping upon him. He +stopped and waited her approach, perplexed as to the cause of it; and +was so unprepared for the box on the ear she dealt him, that it almost +threw him down. Her ankle was instantly in Abdiel's sharp teeth. She +gave a frightful screech, and Clare, coming to himself, though still +stupid from her blow and his own surprise, called off the dog. The +woman limped raging to the house, and Clare thought it prudent to go +his way. He talked severely to Abdiel as they went; but though the dog +could understand much, I doubt if he understood that lecture. For +Abdiel was one of the few, even among dogs, with whom the defence of +master or friend is an inborn, instinctive duty; and strong temptation +even has but a poor chance against the sense of duty in a dog. + +It was night when they entered the town. They were already a weary +pair when the far sounds of the brass band of the menagerie, mostly +made up of attendants on the animals, first entered their ears. The +marketing was over; the band was issuing its last invitation to the +merry-makers to walk up and see strange sights; its notes were just +dying to their close, when the wayfarers arrived at the foot of the +steps leading to the platform where the musicians stood. Clare +ascended, and Abdiel crept after him. + +At a table in a small curtained recess on the platform, sat the +mistress to receive the money of those that entered. Clare laid his +sovereign before her. She took it up without looking at him, but at it +she looked doubtfully. She threw it on her table. It would not ring. +She bit it with her white teeth, and looked at it again; then at +length gave a glance at the person who offered it. Her dull lamp +flickered in the puffs of the night-wind, and she did not recognize +Clare. She saw but a white-faced, ragged boy, and threw him back his +sovereign. + +"Won't pass," she said with decision, not unmingled with contempt. She +sat at the receipt of money, where too many men and women cease to be +ladies and gentlemen. + +Clare did not at first understand. He stood motionless and, for the +second time that day, bewildered. How could money be no money? + +"'Ain't you got sixpence?" she asked. + +"No, ma'am," answered Clare. "I haven't had sixpence for many a day." + +The moment he spoke, the woman looked him sharply in the face, and +knew him. + +"Drat my stupid eyes!" she said fervently. "That I shouldn't ha' known +you! Walk in, walk in. Go where you please, and do as you +please. You're right welcome.--Where did you get that sov.?" + +"From Farmer Goodenough." + +"Good enough, I hope, not to take advantage of an innocent prince! Was +it for taking home the bull?" + +"No, ma'am. I didn't take the bull home. The bull took me to the old +home where we used to be together. He didn't want a new one!" + +"Well, never mind now. Give me the sovereign. I'll talk to you by and +by. Go in, or the show 'ill be over. Look after your dog, though. We +don't like dogs. He mustn't go in." + +"I'll send him right outside, if you wish it, ma'am." + +"I do.--But will he stay out?" + +"He will, ma'am." + +Clare took up Abdiel, and setting him at the top of the steps, told +him to go down and wait. Abdiel went hopping down, like a dirty little +white cataract out on its own hook, turned in under the steps, and +deposited himself there until his master should call him. + + + +Chapter XLV. + +The menagerie. + + +A strange smell was in Clare's nostrils, and as he went down the steps +inside, it grew stronger. He did not dislike it; but it set him +thinking why it should so differ from that of domestic animals. He was +presently in the midst of a vision attractive to all boys, but which +few had ever looked upon with such intelligent wonder as he; for Clare +had read and re-read every book about animals upon which he could lay +his hands. He had a great power too of remembering what he read; for +he never let a description glide away over the outside of his eyes, +but always put it inside his thinking place. What with pictures and +descriptions, he seemed to know, as he looked around him, every animal +on which his eyes fell. + +The area was by no means crowded. There had been many visitors during +the day, but now it was late. He could see into all the cages that +formed the sides of the enclosure. Many of the creatures seemed +restless, few sleepy: night was the waking time for most of them. How +should a great roaming, hunting cat go to sleep in a little cube of +darkness! "Oh," thought Clare, "how gladly would I help them to bear +it! I could bear it myself with somebody near to be kind to me!" + +He had begun to feel that the quiet happiness to which he was once so +accustomed that he did not think much about it, was his because it was +_given_ him. He had begun to see that it did not come to him of +itself, but from the love of his father and mother. He had yet to +learn that it was given to them to give to him by the Father of +fathers and mothers. But he was beginning to prize every least +kindness shown him. This re-acted on his desire to make the happiness +greater and the pain less everywhere about him. He had little chance +of doing much for people, he thought; but he knew how to do things for +some animals, and perhaps it was only necessary to know others to be +able to do something for them too! + +Thoughts like these passing through his mind, and his gaze wandering +hither and thither over the shifting shapes, his eyes rested on the +tenant of one of the cages, and his heart immediately grew very sore, +for he seemed unable to lift his head. He was a big animal, alone in +his prison, of a blackish colour, and awkward appearance. He went +nearer, and found he had a big ring in his nose like Nimrod. But to +the ring was fastened a strong chain, and the chain was bolted down to +the floor of the cage, which was of iron covered with boards, in their +turn covered with a thick sheet of lead. The chain was so short that +it held the poor creature's head within about a foot of the floor. He +could not lift it higher, or move it farther on either side; but he +kept moving it constantly. It was a pitiful sight, and Clare went +nearer still, drawn far more by compassion, and indeed sympathy, than +by curiosity. He was a terrible brute, a big grizzly bear, ugly to +repulsiveness. The snarling scorn, the sneering, lip-writhing hate of +the demoniacal grin with which he received the boy, was hideous; the +rattling, pebble-jarring growl that came from his devilish throat was +loathing embodied. What if spirits worse than their own get into some +of the creatures by virtue of the likeness between them! One day will +be written, perhaps, a history of animals very different from any +attempted by mere master in zoology. Clare spoke to the beast again +and again, but was unvaryingly answered by the same odious snarl, +curling his lip under his nose-ring. It seemed to express the imagined +delight of tearing him limb from limb. + +"Poor fellow!" said Clare, "how can he be good-tempered with that +torturing ring and chain! His unalterable position must make his every +bone ache!" + +But had his nose been set free, such a raging-bear-struggle to get at +the nearest of his fellow-prisoners would have ensued, as must soon +have torn to shreds the partition between them. For he was a +beast-bedlamite, an animal volcano, a furnace of death, an incarnate +paroxysm of wrath. The inspiration of the creature, so far as one +could see, was pure hate. + +The boy turned aside with quivering heart--sore for the grizzly's +nose, and sorer still for the grizzly himself that he was so +unfriendly. + +Right opposite, a creature of a far differing disposition seemed +casting defiance to all the ills of life. As he turned with a sad +despair from the grizzly, Clare caught sight of his pranks, and +hastened across the area. The creature kept bounding from side to side +of his cage, agile and frolicsome as a kitten. But the light was poor, +and Clare could not even conjecture to which of the cat-kinds he +belonged. When he came near his cage, he saw that he was yellowish +like a lion, and thought perhaps he might be a young lion. He had no +mane. Clare judged him four feet in length without the tail--or +perhaps four and a half. A little way off was the real lion--a young +one, it is true, but quite grown, with a thin ruffy mane, and lordly +carriage and gaze. It was he whose roar had challenged Nimrod, giving +the topmost flutter to the flame of his wrath. But Clare was so taken +with the frolicsome creature before him, that he gave but a glance at +the grand one as he walked up and down his prison, and turned again to +the merry one disporting himself alone, who seemed to find the +pleasure of life in great games with companions no one saw but +himself. For minutes he stood regarding the gladness of God's +creature. A wild thing of the woods and plains, he made the most of +the bars and floor and roof of his cage. No one careless of liberty +could make such bounds as those; yet he was joyous in closest +imprisonment! His liberty gone, his freedom contracted to a few cubic +feet, his space diminished almost to the mould of his body, the great +wild philosopher created his own liberty, made it out of his own love +of it. Like a live, erratic shuttle he went to and fro, unweaving, +unravelling, unwinding, drawing out the knot of confinement, flinging +out, radiating and spreading and breathing out space in all +directions, by multitudinous motion of disentanglement! Space gone +from him, space in the abstract should replace it! He would not be +slave to condition! Space unconditioned should be his! For him liberty +should not lie in space, but in his own soul. Room should be but the +poor out-aide symbol of his inward freedom! He would spin out, he +would weave, he would unroll essential liberty into spiritual space! +His mind to him a kingdom was. Not a grumble, not a snarl! He left +discontent to men, to build their own prisons withal. A proud man with +everything he longs for, if such a man there be, is but a slave; this +creature of the glad creator was and would be free, because he was a +free soul. Prison bars could not touch that by whose virtue he was and +would be free! + +The germ of this thinking was in the mind of Clare while he stood and +gazed; and as he told me the story, its ripeness came thus, or nearly +thus, from his lips; for he had thought much in lonely places. + +As he gazed and sympathized, there awoke within him that strange +consciousness which my reader must, at one time or another, have +known--of being on the point of remembering something. It was not a +memory that came, but a memory of a memory--the shadow of a memory +gone, but trying to come out from behind a veil--a sense of having +once known something. It gave another aspect to the blessed creature +before him. The creature and himself seemed for a moment to belong +together to another time. Could he have seen such an animal before? He +did not think so! He could never have visited a menagerie and +forgotten it! If he had known such a creature, his after-reading would +have recalled it, he would know it now! He could tell the lion and the +tiger and the leopard, although he seemed to know he had never seen +one of them; he could not tell this animal, and yet--and yet!--what +was it? The feeling itself lasted scarce an instant, and went no +farther. No memory came to him. The foiled expectation was all he +had. The very reasoning about it helped to obliterate the shape of the +feeling itself. He could not even recall how the thing had felt; he +could only remember it had been there. It was now but the shadow of +the shadow of a dream--a yet vaguer memory than that thinnest of +presences which had at the first tantalized him. We remember what we +cannot recall. + +Perhaps the rousing of the odd, fantastic feeling had been favoured by +the slumber beginning to encroach on tody and brain. While he stood +looking at the one creature, all the wonderful creatures began to get +mixed up together, and he thought it better to go and search for some +field of sleep, where he might mow a little for his use. He said +good-night to the great, gentle, jubilant cat, turned from him +unwillingly, and went up the steps. Almost every spectator was +gone. At the top of them he turned for a last look, but could +distinguish nothing except the dim form of the young lion, as he +thought him, still gamboling in the presence of his maker. + +He thought to see the mistress of the menagerie, but she was no longer +in her curtained box. He went out on the deserted platform, and down +the steps. Abdiel was already at the foot when he reached it, wagging +his weary little tail. + +They set out to look for a shelter. Their search, however, was so much +in vain, that at last they returned and lay down under one of the +wagons, on the hard ground of the public square. Sleeping so often out +of doors, he had never yet taken cold. + + + +Chapter XLVI. + +The angel of the wild beasts. + + +When Clare looked up he saw nothing between him and the sky. They had +dragged the caravan from above him, and he had not moved. Abdiel +indeed waked at the first pull, but had lain as still as a +mouse--ready to rouse his master, but not an instant before it should +be necessary. + +Clare saw the sky, but he saw something else over him, better than the +sky--the face of Mrs. Halliwell, the mistress of the menagerie. In it, +as she stood looking down on him, was compassion, mingled with +self-reproach. + +Clare jumped up, saying, "Good morning, ma'am!" He was yet but half +awake, and staggered with sleep. + +"My poor boy!" answered the woman, "I sent you to sleep on the cold +earth, with a sovereign of your own in my pocket! I made sure you +would come and ask me for it! You're too innocent to go about the +world without a mother!" + +She turned her face away. + +"But, ma'am, you know I couldn't have offered it to anybody," said +Clare. "It wasn't good!--Besides, before I knew that," he went on, +finding she did not reply, "there was nobody but you I dared offer it +to: they would have said I stole it--because I'm so shabby!" he added, +looking down at his rags. "But it ain't in the clothes, ma'am--is it?" + +Getting the better of her feelings for a moment, she turned her face +and said,-- + +"It was all my fault! The sov. is a good one. It's only cracked! I +ought to have known, and changed it for you. Then all would have been +well!" + +"I don't think it would have made any difference, ma'am. We would +rather sleep on the ground than in a bed that mightn't be +clean--wouldn't we, Abby?" The dog gave a short little bark, as he +always did when his master addressed him by his name.--"But I'm so +glad!" Clare went on. "I was sure Mr. Goodenough thought the sovereign +all right when he gave it me!--Were you ever disappointed in a +sovereign, ma'am?" + +"I been oftener disappointed in them as owed 'em!" she answered. "But +to think o' me snug in bed, an' you sleepin' out i' the dark night! I +can't abide the thought on it!" + +"Don't let it trouble you, ma'am; we're used to it. Ain't we, Abby?" + +"Then you oughtn't to be! and, please God, you shall be no more! But +come along and have your breakfast We don't start till the last." + +"Please, ma'am, may Abdiel come too?" + +"In course! 'Love me, love my dog!' Ain't that right?" + +"Yes, ma'am; but some people like dogs worse than boys." + +"A good deal depends on the dog. When folk brings up their dogs as bad +as they do their childern, I want neither about me. But your dog's a +well-behaved dog. Still, he must learn not to come in sight o' the +animals." + +"He will learn, ma'am!--Abdiel, lie down, and don't come till I call +you." + +At the word, the dog dropped, and lay. + +The house-caravan stood a little way off, drawn aside when they began +to break up. They ascended its steps behind, and entered an enchanting +little room. It had muslin curtains to the windows, and a small stove +in which you could see the bright red coals. On the stove stood a +coffee-pot and a covered dish. How nice and warm the place felt, after +the nearly shelterless night! + +The breakfast-things were still on the table. Mr. Halliwell had had +his breakfast, but Mrs. Halliwell would not eat until she had found +the boy. She had been unhappy about him all the night. Her husband had +assured her the sovereign was a good one, and the boy had told her he +had no money but the sovereign! She little knew how seldom he fared +better than that same night! When he got among hay or straw, that was +luxury. + +They sat down to breakfast, and the good woman was very soon confirmed +in the notion that the boy was a gentleman. + +"Call your dog now," she said, "an' let's see if he'll come!" + +"May I whistle, ma'am?" + +"Why not!--But will he hear you?" + +"He has very sharp ears, ma'am." + +Clare gave a low, peculiar whistle. In a second or two, they heard an +anxious little whine at the door. Clare made haste to open it. There +stood Abdiel, with the words in his eyes, as plain almost as if he +spoke them--"Did you call, sir?" The woman caught him and held him to +her bosom. + +"You blessed little thing!" she said. + +And surely if there be a blessing to be had, it is for them that obey. + +Clare heard and felt the horses put-to, but the hostess of this +Scythian house did not rise, and he too went on with his +breakfast. When they were in motion, it was not so easy to eat nicely, +but he managed very well. By the time he had done, they had left the +town behind them. He wanted to help Mrs. Halliwell with the +breakfast-things, but whether she feared he would break some of them, +or did not think it masculine work, she would not allow him. + +Nothing had been said about his going with them; she had taken that +for granted. Clare began to think perhaps he ought to take his leave: +there was nothing for him to do! He and Abdiel ought at least to get +out and walk, instead of burdening the poor horses with their weight, +when they were so well rested, and had had such a good breakfast! But +when he said so to Mrs. Halliwell, she told him she must have a little +talk with him first, and formally proposed that he should enter their +service, and do whatever he was fit for in the menagerie. + +"You're not frightened of the beasts, are you?" she said. + +"Oh no, ma'am; I love them!" answered Clare. "But are you sure +Mr. Halliwell thinks I could be of use?" + +"Don't you think yourself you could?" asked Mrs. Halliwell. + +"I know I could, ma'am; but I should not like him to take me just +because he was sorry for me!" + +"You innocent! People are in no such hurry to help their +neighbours. My husband's as good a man as any going; but it don't mean +he would take a boy because nobody else would have him. A fool of a +woman might--I won't say; but not a man I ever knew. No, no! He saw +the way you managed that bull!--a far more unreasonable creature than +any we have to do with!" + +"Ah! you don't know Nimrod, ma'am!" + +"I don't, an' I don't want to!--Such wild animals ought to be put in +caravans!" she added, with a laugh. + +"Well, ma'am," said Clare, "if you and Mr. Halliwell are of one mind, +nothing would please me so much as to serve you and the beasts. But I +should like to be sure about it, for where husband and wife are not of +one mind--well, it is uncomfortable!" + +Thereupon he told her how he had stood with the farmer and his wife; +and from that she led him on through his whole story--not +unaccompanied with tears on the part of his deliverer, for she was a +tender-souled as well as generous and friendly woman. In her heart she +rejoiced to think that the boy's sufferings would now be at an end; +and thenceforward she was, as he always called her, his third mother. + +"My poor, ill-used child!" she said. "But I'll be a mother to you--if +you'll have me!" + +"You wouldn't mind if I thought rather often of my two other mothers, +ma'am--would you?" he said. + +"God forbid, boy!" she answered. "If I were your real mother, would I +have my own flesh and blood ungrateful? Should I be proud of him for +loving nobody but me? That's like the worst of the beasts: they love +none but their little ones--and that only till they're tired of the +trouble of them!" + +"Thank you! Then I will be your son Clare, please, ma'am." + +The next time they stopped, she made her husband come into her +caravan, and then and there she would and did have everything +arranged. When both her husband and the boy would have left his wages +undetermined, she would not hear of it, but insisted that so much a +week should be fixed at once to begin with. She had no doubt, she +said, that her husband would soon be ready enough to raise his wages; +but he must have his food and five shillings a week now, and +Mr. Halliwell must advance money to get him decent clothes: he might +keep the wages till the clothes were paid for! + +Everything she wished was agreed to by her husband, and at the next +town, Clare's new mother saw him dressed to her satisfaction, and to +his own. She would have his holiday clothes better than his present +part in life required, and she would not let his sovereign go toward +paying for them: that she would keep ready in case he might want it! +Her eyes followed him about with anxious pride--as if she had been his +mother in fact as she was in truth. + +He had at once plenty to do. The favour of his mother saved him from +no kind of work, neither had he any desire it should. Every morning he +took his share in cleaning out the cages, and in setting water for the +beasts, and food for the birds and such other creatures as took it +when they pleased. At the proper intervals he fed as many as he might +of those animals that had stated times for their meals; and found the +advantage of this in its facilitating his friendly approaches to +them. He helped with the horses also--with whose harness and ways he +was already familiar. In a very short time he was known as a friend by +every civilized animal in and about the caravans. + +He did all that was required of him, and more. Not everyone of course +had a right to give him orders, but Clare was not particular as to who +wanted him, or for what. He was far too glad to have work to look at +the gift askance. He did not make trouble of what ought to be none, by +saying, with the spirit of a slave, "It's not my place." He did many +things which he might have disputed, for he never thought of disputing +them. Thus, both for himself and for others, he saved a great deal of +time, and avoided much annoyance and much quarrelling. Thus also he +gained many friends. + + + +Chapter XLVII. + +Glum Gunn. + + +He had but one enemy, and he did not make him such: he was one by +nature. For he was so different from Clare that he disliked him the +moment he saw him, and it took but a day to ripen his dislike into +hatred. Like Mr. Maidstone, he found the innocent fearlessness of +Clare's expression repulsive. His fingers twitched, he said, to have a +twist at the sheep-nose of him. Unhappily for Clare, he was of +consequence in the menagerie, having money in the concern. He was +half-brother to the proprietor, but so unlike him that he might not +have had a drop of blood from the same source. An ill-tempered, +imperious man, he would hurt himself to have his way, for he was the +merest slave to what he fancied. When a man _will_ have a thing, right +or wrong, that man is a slave to that thing--the meanest of slaves, a +willing one. He was the terror of the men beneath him, heeding no man +but his brother--and him only because he knew "he would stand no +nonsense." To his sister-in-law he was civil: she was his brother's +wife, and his brother was proud of her! Also he knew that she was +perfect in her part of the business. So it was reason to stand as well +as he might with her! + +Clare had no suspicion that he more than disliked him. It took him +days indeed to discover even that he did not love him--notwithstanding +the bilious eye which, when its owner was idle, kept constantly +following him. And idle he often was, not from laziness, but from the +love of ordering about, and looking superior. + +It was natural that such a man should also be cruel. There are who +find their existence pleasant in proportion as they make that of +others miserable. He had no liking for any of the animals, regarding +them only as property with never a right;--as if God would make +anything live without thereby giving it rights! To Glum Gunn, as he +was commonly called behind his back, the animals were worth so much +money to sell, and so much to show. Yet he prided himself that he had +a great influence as well as power over them, an occult superiority +that made him their lord. It was merely a phase of the vulgarest +self-conceit. He posed to himself as a lion-tamer! He had never tamed +a lion, or any creature else, in his life; but when he had a wild +thing safe within iron bars, then he "let him know who was his +master!" By the terror of his whip, and means far worse, he compelled +obedience. The grizzly alone, of the larger animals, he never +interfered with. + +From the first he received Clare's "_Good-morning, sir_," with a +silent stare; and the boy at last, thinking he did not like to be so +greeted, gave up the salutation. This roused Gunn's anger and +increased his hate. But indeed any boy petted by his sister-in-law, +would have been odious to him; and any boy whatever would have found +him a hard master. Clare was for a while protected by the man's +unreadiness to have words with his brother, who always took his wife's +part; but the tyrant soon learned that he might venture far. + +For he saw, by the boy's ready smile, that he never resented anything, +which the brute, as most boys would have done, attributed to +cowardice; and he learned that he never carried tales to his sister, +of which, instead of admiring him for his reticence, he took +advantage, and set about making life bitter to him. + +It was some time before he began to succeed, for Clare was hard to +annoy. Patient, and right ready to be pleased, he could hardly imagine +offence intended; the thought was all but unthinkable to Clare's +nature; so he let evil pass and be forgotten as if it had never been. +Once, as he ran along with a heavy pail of water, Gunn shot out his +foot and threw him down: he rose with a cut in his forehead, and a +smile on his lips. He carried the mark of the pail as long as he +carried his body, but it was long before he believed he had been +tripped up. Had it been proved to him at the time, he would have taken +it as a joke, intending no hurt. He did not see the lurid smile on the +man's face as he turned away, a smile of devilish delight at the +discomfiture of a hated fellow-creature. Gunn put him to the dirtiest +work--only to find that it did not trouble him: the boy was a rare +gentleman--unwilling another should have more that he might have less +of the disagreeable. I have two or three times heard him say that no +man had the right to require of another the thing he would think +degrading to himself. He said he learned this from the New Testament. +"But," he said, "nothing God has made necessary, can possibly be +degrading. It may not be the thing for this or that man, at this or +that time, to do, but it cannot in itself be degrading." + +The boy had to take his turn with several in acting showman to the +gazing crowd, and by and by the part fell to him oftenest. Each had +his own way of filling the office. One would repeat his information +like a lesson in which he was not interested, and expected no one else +to be interested. Another made himself the clown of the exhibition, +and joked as much and as well as he could. Gunn delighted in telling +as many lies as he dared: he must not be suspected of making fools of +his audience! Clare, who from books knew far more than any of the +others concerning the creatures in their wild state, and who, by +watching them because he loved them, had already noted things none of +the others had observed, and was fast learning more, talked to the +spectators out of his own sincere and warm interest, giving them from +his treasure things new and old--things he had read, and things he had +for himself discovered. Group after group of simple country people +would listen intently as he led them round, eager after every word; +and as any peg will do to hang hate upon, even this success was noted +with evil eye by Glum Gunn. Almost anything served to increase his +malignity. Whether or not it grew the faster that he had as yet found +no wider outlet for it, I cannot tell. + +At last, however, the tyrant learned how to inflict the keenest pain +on the tender-hearted boy, counting him the greater idiot that he +could so "be got at," as he phrased it, and promising himself much +enjoyment from the discovery. But he did not know--how should he +know--what love may compel! + + + +Chapter XLVIII. + +The puma. + + +I need hardly say that by this time all the beasts with any +friendliness in them had for Clare a little more than their usual +amount of that feeling. But there was one between whom and him--I +prefer _who_ to _which_ for certain animals--a real friendship had +begun at once, and had grown and ripened rapidly till it was strong on +both sides. Clare's new friend--and companion as much as circumstance +permitted--was the same whose lonely gambols had so much attracted him +the night he first entered the menagerie. The animal, whom Clare had +taken for a young lion--without being so far wrong, for he has often +been called the American lion--was the puma, or couguar, peculiar to +America, with a relation to the jaguar, also American, a little +similar to that of the lion to the tiger. But while the jaguar is as +wicked a beast as the tiger, the puma possesses, in relation to man, +far more than the fabulous generosity of the lion. Like every good +creature he has been misunderstood and slandered, but a few have known +him, He has doubtless degenerated in districts, for as the wild animal +must gradually disappear before the human, he cannot help becoming in +the process less friendly to humanity; but an essential and +distinctive characteristic of the puma is his love for the human +being--a love persistent, devoted, and long-suffering. + +Between such an animal and Clare, it is not surprising that friendship +should at once have blossomed. He stroked the paw of the Indian lion +the first morning, but the day was not over when he was stroking the +cheek of the puma; while all he could do with the grizzly at the end +of the month was to feed him a little on the sly, and get for thanks a +growl of the worse hate. There are men that would soonest tear their +benefactors, loathing them the more that they cannot get at them. I +suspect that in some mysterious way Glum Gunn and the bear were own +brothers. With the elephant Clare did what he pleased--never pleasing +anything that was not pleasing to the elephant. + +They came to a town where they exhibited every day for a week, and +there it was that the friendship of Clare and the puma reached its +perfection. One night the boy could not sleep, and drawn by his love, +went down among the cages to see how his fellow-creatures were getting +through the time of darkness. There was just light enough from a small +moon to show the dim outlines of the cages, and the motion without the +form of any moving animal. The puma, in his solitary yet joyous +gymnastics, was celebrating the rites of freedom according to his +custom. When Clare entered, he made a peculiar purring noise, and +ceased his amusement--a game at ball, with himself for the ball. Clare +went to him, and began as usual to stroke him on the face and nose; +whereupon the puma began to lick his hand with his dry rough +tongue. Clare wondered how it could be nice to have such a dry thing +always in his mouth, but did not pity him for what God had given +him. He had his arm through between the bars of the cage, and his face +pressed close against them, when suddenly the face of the animal was +rubbing itself against what it could reach of his. The end was, that +Clare drew aside the bolt of the cage-door, and got in beside the +puma. The creature's gladness was even greater than if he had found a +friend of his own kind. Noses and cheeks and heads were rubbed +together; tongue licked, and hand stroked and scratched. Then they +began to frolic, and played a long time, the puma jumping over Clare, +and Clare, afraid to jump lest he should make a noise, tumbling over +the puma. The boy at length went fast asleep; and in the morning found +the creature lying with his head across his body, wide awake but +motionless, as if guarding him from disturbance. Nobody was stirring; +and Clare, who would not have their friendship exposed to every +comment, crept quietly from the cage, and went to his own bed. + +The next night, as soon as the place was quiet, Clare went down, and +had another game with the puma. Before their sport was over, he had +begun to teach him some of the tricks he had taught Abdiel; but he +could not do much for fear of making a noise and alarming some keeper. + +The same thing took place, as often as it was possible, for some +weeks, and Clare came to have as much confidence, in so far at least +as good intention was concerned, in the puma as in Abdiel. If only he +could have him out of the cage, that the dear beast might have a +little taste of old liberty! But not being certain how the puma would +behave to others, or if he could then control him, he felt he had no +right to release him. + +Now and then he would fall asleep in the cage, whereupon the puma +would always lie down close beside him. Whether the puma slept, I do +not know. + +On one such occasion, Clare started to his feet half-awake, roused by +a terrific roar. Right up on end stood the couguar, flattening his +front against the bars of the cage, which he clawed furiously, +snarling and spitting and yelling like the huge cat he was, every +individual hair on end, and his eyes like green lightning. Clatter, +clatter, went his great feet on the iron, as he tore now at this bar +now at that, to get at something out in the dim open space. It was too +dark for Clare to see what it was that thus infuriated him, but his +ear discovered what his eye could not. For now and then, woven into +the mad noise of the wild creature, in which others about him were +beginning to join, he heard the modest whimper of a very tame +one--Abdiel, against whose small person, gladly as he would have been +"naught a while," this huge indignation was levelled. Must there not +be a deeper ground for the enmity of dogs and cats than evil human +incitement? Their antipathy will have to be explained in that history +of animals which I have said must one day be written. + +Clare had taken much pains to make Abdiel understand that he was not +to intrude where his presence was not desired--that the show was not +for him, and thought the dog had learned perfectly that never on any +pretence, or for any reason, was he to go down those steps, however +often he saw his master go down. This prohibition was a great trial to +Abdiel's loving heart, but it had not until this night been a trial +too great for his loving will. + +When Clare left him, he thought he had taken his usual pains in +shutting him into a small cage he had made to use on such occasions, +lest he might be tempted to think, when he saw nobody about, that the +law no longer applied. But he had not been careful enough; and Abdiel, +sniffing about and finding his door unfastened, had interpreted the +fact as a sign that he might follow his master. Hence all the +coil. For pumas--whereby also must hang an explanation in that book of +zoology, have an intense hatred of dogs. Tame from cubhood, they never +get over their antipathy to them. With pumas it is "Love you, hate +your dog." In the present case there could be no individual jealousy, +of which passion beasts and birds are very capable, for Pummy had +never seen Abby before. There may be in the puma an inborn jealousy of +dogs, as a race more favoured than pumas by the man whom yet they love +perhaps more passionately. + +As soon as Clare saw what the matter was, he slipped out of the cage, +and catching up the obnoxious offender--where he stood wagging all +over as if his entire body were but a self-informed tail--sped with +him to his room, and gave him a serious talking-to. + +The puma was quiet the moment the dog was out of his sight. Doubtless +he regarded Clare as his champion in distress, and blessed him for the +removal of that which his soul hated. But, alas, mischief was already +afoot! Gunn, waked by the roaring, came flying with his whip, and the +remnants of poor Pummy's excitement were enough to betray him to the +eyes of the tamer of caged animals. Clare would have recognized by the +roar itself the individual in trouble; but Glum Gunn had little +knowledge even of the race. He counted the couguar a coward, because +he showed no resentment. A man may strike him or wound him, and he +will make no retaliation; he will even let a man go on to kill him, +and make no defence beyond moans and tears. But Gunn knew nothing of +these facts; he only knew that this puma would not touch _him_. He was +not aware that if he turned the two into the arena of the show, the +puma would kill the grizzly; or that in their own country, the puma +persecutes the jaguar as if he hated him for not being like himself, +the friend of man: the Gauchos of the Pampas call him "The Christians' +Friend." Gunn did not even know that the horse is the puma's favourite +food: he will leap on the back of a horse at full speed, with his paws +break his neck as he runs, and come down with him in a rolling +heap. Neither did he know that, while submissive to man--as if the +maker of both had said to him, "Slay my other creatures, but do my +anointed no harm,"--he could yet upon occasion be provoked to punish +though not to kill him. + +Glum Gunn rushed across the area, jumped into the cage of the puma, +and began belabouring him with his whip. The beast whimpered and wept, +and the brute belaboured him. Clare heard the changed cry of his +friend, and came swooping like the guardian angel he was. When he saw +the patient creature on his haunches like a dog, accepting Gunn's +brutality without an attempt to escape it--except, indeed, by dodging +any blows at his head so cleverly that the ruffian could not once hit +it--he bounded to the cage, wild with anger and pity. But Gunn stood +with his back against the door of it, and he was reduced to entreaty. + +"Oh, sir! sir!" he cried, in a voice full of tears; "it was all my +fault! Abby came to look for me, and I didn't know Pummy disliked +dogs!" + +"Do you tell me, you rascal, that you were down among the hanimals +when I supposed you in your bed?" + +"Yes, sir, I was. I didn't know there was any harm. I wasn't doing +anything wrong." + +"Hold your jaw! What _was_ you doing?" + +"I was only in the cage with the puma." + +"You was! You have the impudence to tell me that to my face! I'll +teach you, you cotton-face! you milk-pudding! to go corrupting the +hanimals and making them not worth their salt!" + +He swung himself out of the cage-door in a fury, but Clare, with his +friend in danger, would not run. The wretch seized him by the collar, +and began to lash him as he had been lashing the puma. Happily he was +too close to him to give him such stinging blows. + +With the first hiss of the thong, came a tearing screech from the +puma, as he flung himself in fury upon the door of his cage. Gunn in +his wrath with Clare had forgotten to bolt it. Dragging with his +claws, he found it unfastened, pulled it open, and like a huge shell +from a mortar, shot himself at Gunn. Down he went. For one moment the +puma stood over him, swinging his tail in great sweeps, and looking at +him, doubtless with indignation. Then before Clare could lay hold of +him, for Clare too had fallen by the onset, Pummy turned a scornful +back upon his enemy, and walking away with a slow, careless stride, as +if he were not worth thinking of more, leaped into his cage, and lay +down. The thing passed so swiftly that Clare did not see him touch the +man with his paw, and thought he had but thrown him down with his +weight. The beast, however, had not left the brute without the lesson +he needed; he had given him just one little pat on the side of the +head. + +Gunn rose staggering. The skin and something more was torn down his +cheek from the temple almost to the chin, and the blood was +streaming. Clare hastened to help him, but he flung him aside, +muttering with an oath, "I'll make you pay for this!" and went out, +holding his head with both hands. + +Clare went and shot the bolt of the cage. Pummy sprang up. His tail +and swift-shifting feet showed eager expectation of a romp. He had +already forgotten the curling lash of the terrible whip! But Clare +bade him good-night with a kiss through the bars. + +Glum Gunn kept his bed for more than a week. When at length he +appeared, a demonstration of the best art of the surgeon of the town, +he was not beautiful to look upon. To the end of his evil earthly days +he bore an ugly scar; and neither his heart nor his temper were the +better for his well deserved punishment. + +Mrs. Halliwell questioned Clare about the whole thing, inquiring +further and further as his answers suggested new directions. Her +catechism ended with a partial discovery of Gunn's behaviour to her +_proteg_, whom she loved the more that he had been so silent +concerning it. She stood perturbed. One moment her face flushed with +anger, the next turned pale with apprehension. She bit her lip, and +the tears came in her eyes. + +"Never mind, mother," said Clare, who saw no reason for such emotion; +"I'm not afraid of him." + +"I know you're not, sonny," she answered; "but that don't make me the +less afraid for you. He's a bad man, that brother-in-law of mine! I +fear he'll do you a mischief. I'm afraid I did wrong in taking you! I +ought to have done what I could for you without keeping you about +me. We can't get rid of him because he's got money in the business. +Not that he's part owner--I don't mean that! If we'd got the money +handy, we'd pay him off at once!" + +"I don't care about myself," said Clare. "I don't mean I like to be +kicked, but it don't make me miserable. What I can't bear is to see +him cruel to the beasts. I love the beasts, mother--even cross old +Grizzly.--But Mr. Gunn don't meddle much with _him_!" + +"He respects his own ugly sort!" answered Mrs. Halliwell, with a +laugh. + +For a while it was plain to Clare that the master kept an eye on his +brother, and on himself and the puma. On one occasion he told the +assembled staff that he would have no tyranny: every one knew there +was among them but one tyrant. Gunn saw that his brother was awake and +watching: it was a check on his conduct, but he hated Clare the +worse. For the puma, he was afraid of him now, and went no more into +his cage. + +With the rest of the men Clare was a favourite, for they knew him true +and helpful, and constantly the same: they could always depend on him! +Abdiel shared in the favour shown his master. They said the dog was no +beauty, and had not a hair of breeding, but he was almost a human +creature, if he wasn't too good for one, and it was a shame to kick +him. + + + +Chapter XLIX. + +Glum Gunn's revenge. + + +They had opened the menagerie in a certain large town. It was the +evening-exhibition, and Clare was going his round with his wand of +office, pointing to the different animals, and telling of them what he +thought would most interest his hearers, when another attendant, the +most friendly of all, came behind him, and whispered that Glum Gunn +had got hold of Abby, and must be going to do the dog a +mischief. Clare instantly gave him his wand, and bolted through the +crowd, reproaching himself that, because Abby seemed restless, he had +shut him up: if he had not been shut up, Gunn would not have got hold +of him! + +When he reached the top of the steps, there was Gunn on the platform, +addressing the crowd. It was plain to the boy, by this time not +inexperienced, that he had been drinking, and, though not drunk, had +taken enough to rouse the worst in him. He had the poor dog by the +scruff of the neck, and was holding him out at arm's-length. Abdiel +was the very picture of wretchedness. Except in colour and size, he +was more like a flea than like any sort of dog--with his hind legs +drawn up, his tail tucked in tight between them, and his back-bone +curved into a half circle. In this uncomfortable plight, the tyrant +was making a burlesque speech about him. + +"Here you see, ladies and gentlemen," he said, resuming a little, for +a few fresh spectators were in the act of joining the border of the +crowd, "as I have already had the honour of informing you, one of the +most extraordinary productions of the vegetable kingdom. It is not +unnatural that you should be, as I see you are, inclined to dispute +the assertion. I am, indeed, far from being surprised at your +scepticism; the very strangeness of the phenomenon consists in his +being to all appearance neither more nor less than a dog. But when I +have the honour of leaving you to your astonishment, I shall have +convinced you that he is in reality nothing but a vegetable. I would +plainly call him what he is--a cucumber, did I not fear the statement +would demand of you more than your powers of credence, evidently +limited, could well afford. But when I have, before your eyes, cut the +throat of this vegetable, so extremely like an ugly mongrel, and when +those eyes see no single drop of blood follow the knife, then you will +be satisfied of the truth of my assertion; and, having gazed on such a +specimen of Nature's jugglery, will, I hope, do me the honour to walk +up and behold yet greater wonders within." + +He ceased, and set about getting his knife from his pocket. + +Clare, watching Gunn's every motion, had partially sheltered himself +behind the side of the doorway. One who did not know Gunn, might well +have taken the thing for a practical joke, as innocent as it was +foolish, the pretended conclusion of which would be met by some +comical frustration, probably the dog's escape; but Clare saw that his +friend was in mortal peril. With the eye of one used to wild animals +and the unexpectedness of their sudden motions, he stood following +every movement of Gunn's hands, ready to anticipate whatever action +might indicate its own approach: he watched like the razor-clawed +lynx. While Gunn held Abdiel as he did, he could not seriously injure +him; and although he was hurting him dreadfully, his hate-possessed +fingers, like a live, writhing vice, worrying and squeezing the skin +of his poor little neck, it yet was better to wait the right moment. + +When he saw the arm that held the dog drawn in, and the other hand +move to the man's pocket, he knew that in a moment more, with a +theatrical cry of dismay from the murderer, the body of his friend +would be dashed on the ground, his head half off, and the blood +streaming from his neck. They were mostly a rather vulgar people that +stood about the platform, not a few of them capable of being delighted +with such an end to a joke poor without some catastrophe. + +The wretch had stooped a little, and slightly relaxed his hold on the +dog to open his knife, when with a bound that doubled the force of the +blow Clare struck him on the side of the head. He had no choice where +to hit him, and his fist fell on the spot so lately torn by the claws +of Pummy. The tyrant fell, and lay for a moment stunned. Abdiel flung +himself on his master, exultant at finding the thing after all the +joke he had been trying in vain to believe it. Clare caught him up and +dashed down the steps, one instant before Glum Gunn rose, cursing +furiously. Clare charged the crowd: it was not a time to be civil! +Abdiel's life was in imminent danger! That his own was in the same +predicament did not occur to him. + +His sudden rush took the crowd by surprise, or those next the caravans +would, I fear, have stopped him. Some started to follow him, but the +portion of the crowd he came to next, had more in it of a better sort, +and closed up behind him. There all the women and most of the men took +the part of the boy that loved his dog. + +"What be you a-shovin' at?" bawled a huge country-man, against whom +Gunn made a cannon as he rushed in pursuit. "Aw'll knock 'ee flat--aw +wull! Let little un an's dawg aloan! Aw be for un! Hit me an'ye +choose--aw doan't objec'!" + +Every attempt Gunn made to pass him, the man pushed his great body in +his way, and he soon saw there was no chance of overtaking Clara The +wings of Hate are swift, but not so swift as those of rescuing Love; +and Help is far readier to run to Love than to Hate. + + + +Chapter L. + +Clare seeks help. + + +Clare got out of the crowd, and was soon beyond sight of anyone that +knew what had taken place, his heart exulting that he had saved his +friend who trusted in him. He hurried on, heedless whither, his only +thought to get away from the man that would murder Abby; and the town +was a long way behind ere the question of what they were to do for +supper and shelter presented itself. This had grown a strange thought, +so long had the caravan been to him a house of warmth and plenty. But +comfort has its disadvantages; and Clare discovered, with some dismay, +that he was not quite so free as ere the luxurious life of the last +few weeks began: both Abby and he would be less able, he feared, to +bear hunger and cold. It was but to start afresh, however, and grow +abler! One consolation was, that, if they felt hunger more, it could +not do them so much harm: they had more capital to go upon. He must +not gather cowardice instead of courage from a season of prosperity! +He was glad for Abdiel, though, that he grew his own clothes: he had +left his warmest behind him. + +It made him ashamed to find himself regretting his clothes when he had +lost a mother! Then it pleased him to think that she had his +sovereign, and the wages due since his clothes were paid for. They +would help to give Glum Gunn his own, and set the beasts free from +him! Then he would go back and spend his life with his mother and +Pummy! Poor Pummy! But though Gunn hated him, he was now afraid of him +too; and his fear would be the creature's protection! He had imagined +it his might that cowed the puma, when it was the animal's human +gentleness that made him submissive to man: he knew better now! Clare +clasped Abdiel to his bosom, and trudged on. They had gone miles ere +it occurred to him that it might be more comfortable for both if each +carried his individual burden. He set Abdiel down, and the dog ran +vibrating with pleasure. Clare felt himself set down, but with no tail +to wag. + +It was late in the autumn: they could do without supper, but they must +if possible find shelter! A farm-house came in sight. It recalled so +vividly Clare's early experiences of houselessness, that beasts and +caravans, his mother and Glum Gunn, grew hazy and distant, and the old +time drew so near that he seemed to have waked into it out of a long +dream. They were back in the old misery--a misery in which, however, +his heart had not been pierced as now with the pangs of innocent +creatures unable or unwilling to defend themselves from their natural +guardian! It was long before he learned that for weeks Gunn was unable +to hurt one of them; that his drinking, his late wound, and the blow +Clare had given him, brought on him a severe attack of erysipelas. + +When they reached the farm-yard, Clare knew by the aspect of things +that the cattle were housed and the horses suppered. He crept unseen +into one of the cow-houses: the bodies and breath of the animals would +keep them warm! How sweet the smell seemed to him after that of the +caravans! An empty stall was before him, like a chamber prepared for +his need. He gathered a few straws from under each of the cows, taking +care that not one of them should be the less comfortable, and spread +with them for Abby and himself a thin couch. + +But with the excitement of what had happened, his wonder as to what +would come next, and the hunger that had begun to gnaw at him, Clare +could not sleep. And as he lay awake, thoughts came to him. + +Whence do the thoughts come to us? Of one thing I am sure--that I do +not make or even send for my own thoughts. If some greater one did not +think about us, we should not think about anything. Then what a wonder +is the night! How it works compelling people to think! Surely somehow +God comes nearer in the night! Clare began to think how helpless he +was. He was not thinking of food and warmth, but of doing things for +the beings he loved. It seemed to him hard that he could but love, and +nothing more. There was his mother! he could do nothing to deliver her +from that villainous brother-in-law! There was Pummy, exposed to the +cruelty of the same evil man! and again he could do nothing for him! +There was Maly! he could do nothing for her--nothing to make her +father and mother glad for her up in the dome of the angels! + +Was it possible that he really could do nothing? + +Then came the thought that people used to say prayers in the days when +he went with his mother to church. He had been taught to say prayers +himself, but had begun to forget them when there was no bed to kneel +beside. What did saying prayers mean? In the Bible-stories people +prayed when they were in trouble and could not help themselves! Did it +matter that he had no church and no bedside? Surely one place must be +as good as another, if it was true that God was everywhere! Surely he +could hear him wherever he spoke! Neither could there be any necessity +for speaking loud! God would hear, however low he spoke! Then he +remembered that God knew the thoughts of his creatures: if so, he +might think a prayer to him; there was no need for any words! + +From the moment of that conclusion, Clare began to pray to God. And +now he prayed the right kind of prayer; that is, his prayers were real +prayers; he asked for what he wanted. To say prayers asking God for +things we do not care about, is to mock him. When we ask for something +we want, it may be a thing God does not care to give us; but he likes +us to speak to him about it. If it is good for us, he will give it us; +if it is not good, he will not give it to us, for it would hurt +us. But Clare only asked God to do what he is always doing: his prayer +was that God would be good to all his mothers, and to his two fathers, +and Mr. Halliwell, and Maly, and Sarah, and his own baby, and +Tommy--and poor Pummy, and would, if Glum Gunn beat him, help him to +bear the blows, and not mind them very much. He ended with something +like this: + +"God, I can't do anything for anybody! I wish I could! You can get +near them, God: please do something good to every one of them because +I can't. I think I could go to sleep now, if I were sure you had +listened!" + +Having thus cast all his cares on God, he did go to sleep; and woke in +the morning ready for the new day that arrived with his waking. + + + +Chapter LI. + +Clare a true master. + + +It would take a big book to tell all the things of interest that +happened to Clare in the next few weeks. They would be mainly how and +where he found refuge, and how he and Abdiel got things to eat. Verily +they did not live on the fat of the land. Now and then some benevolent +person, seeing him in such evident want, would contrive a job in order +to pay him for it: in one place, although they had no need of him, +certain good people gave him ten days' work under a gardener, and +dismissed him with twenty shillings in his pocket. + +One way and another, Clare and Abdiel did not die of hunger or of +cold. That is the summary of their history for a good many weeks. + +One night they slept on a common, in the lee of a gypsy tent, and +contrived to get away in the morning without being seen. For Clare +feared they might offer him something stolen, and hunger might +persuade him to ask no questions. Many respectable people will laugh +at the idea of a boy being so particular. Such are immeasurably more +to be pitied than Clare. No one could be hard on a boy who in such +circumstances took what was offered him, but he would not be so honest +as Clare--though he might well be more honest than such as would laugh +at him. + +Another time he went up to a large house, to see if he might not there +get a job. He found the place, for the time at least, abandoned: I +suppose the persons in charge had deserted their post to make +holiday. He lingered about until the evening fell, and then got with +Abdiel under a glass frame in the kitchen-garden. But the glass was so +close to them that Clare feared breaking it; so they got out again, +and lay down on a bench in a shed for potting plants. + +Clare was waked in the morning by a sound cuff on the side of the +head. He got off the bench, took up Abdiel, and coming to himself, +said to the gardener who stood before him in righteous indignation, + +"I'm much obliged to you for my bedroom, sir. It was very cold last +night." + +His words and respectful manner mollified the gardener a little. + +"You have no business here!" he returned. + +"I know that, sir; but what is a boy to do?" answered Clare. "I wasn't +hurting anything, and it was so cold we might have died if we had +slept out of doors." + +"That's no business of mine!" + +"But it is of mine," rejoined Clare; "--except you think a boy that +can't get work ought to commit suicide. If he mustn't do that, he +can't always help doing what people with houses don't like!" + +The gardener was not a bad sort of fellow, and perceived the truth in +what the boy said. + +"That's always the story!" he replied, however. "Can't get work! No +idle boy ever could get work! I know the sort of you--well!" + +"Would you mind giving me a chance?" returned Clare eagerly. "I +wouldn't ask much wages." + +"You wouldn't, if you asked what you was worth!" + +"We'd be worth our victuals anyhow!" answered Clare, who always +counted the dog. + +"Who's we?" asked the man. "Be there a hundred of you?" + +"No; only two. Only me and Abdiel here!" + +"Oh, that beast of a mongrel?" + +The gardener made a stride as if to seize the dog. Clare bounded from +him. The man burst into a mocking laugh. + +"He's a good dog, indeed, sir!" said Clare. + +"You'll give him the sack before I give you a job." + +"We're old friends, sir; we can't be parted!" + +"I thought as much!" cried the gardener. "They're always ready to +work, an' so hungry! But will they part with the mangy dog? Not they! +Hard work and good wages ain't nowhere beside a mongrel pup! Get out! +Don't I know the whole ugly bilin' of ye!" + +Clare turned away with a gentle good-morning, which the man did not +get out of his heart for a matter of two days, and departed, hugging +Abdiel. + +He was often cold and always hungry, but his life was anything but +dull. The man who does not know where his next meal is to come from, +is seldom afflicted with ennui. That is the monopoly of the enviable +with nothing to do, and everything money can get them. A foolish +west-end life has immeasurably more discomfort in it than that of a +street Arab. The ordinary beggar, while in tolerable health, finds far +more enjoyment than most fashionable ladies. + +Thus Clare went wandering long, seeking work, and finding next to +none--all the time upheld by the feeling that something was waiting +for him somewhere, that he was every day drawing nearer to it. Not +once yet had he lost heart. In very virtue of unselfishness and lack +of resentment, he was strong. Not once had he shed a tear for himself, +not once had he pitied his own condition. + + + +Chapter LII. + +Miss Tempest. + + +Without knowing it, he was approaching the sea. Walking along a chain +of downs, he saw suddenly from the top of one of them, for the first +time in his memory though not in his life, the sea--a pale blue cloud, +as it appeared, far on the horizon, between two low hills. The sight +of it, although he did not at first know what it was, brought with it +a strange inexplicable feeling of dolorous pleasure. For this he could +not account. It was the faintest revival of an all but obliterated +impression of something familiar to his childhood, lying somewhere +deeper than the memory, which was a blank in regard to it. But that +feeling was not all that the sight awoke in him. The pale blue cloud +bore to him such a look of the eternal, that it seemed the very place +for God to live in--the solemn, stirless region of calm in which the +being to whom now of late he had first begun in reality to pray, kept +his abode. The hungry, worn, tattered boy, with nothing to call his +own but a great hope and a little dog, fell down on his bare knees on +the hard road, and stretched out his hands in an ecstasy toward the +low cloud. + +The far-off ringing tramp of a horse's feet aroused him. He rose light +as an athlete, the great hope grown twice its former size, and hunger +forgotten. + +The blue cloud kept in sight, and by and by he knew it was the sea he +saw, though how or at what moment the knowledge came to him he could +not have told. The track was leading him toward one of the principal +southern ports. + +By this time he was again very thin; but he had brown cheeks and clear +eyes, and, save when suffering immediately from hunger, felt perfectly +well. Hunger is a sad thing notwithstanding its deep wholesomeness; +but there is immeasurably more suffering in the world from eating too +much than from eating too little. + +Well able by this time to read the signs of the road, he perceived at +length he must be drawing near a town. He had already passed a house +or two with a little lawn in front, and indications of a garden +behind; and he hoped yet again that here, after all, he might get +work. To door after door he carried his modest request: some doors +were shut in his face almost before he could speak; at others he had a +civil word from maid, or a rough word from man; from none came sound +of assent. It had become harder too to find shelter. Ever as he went, +space was more and more appropriated and enclosed; less and less room +was left for the man for whom had been made no special cubic provision +of earth and air, and who had no money--the most disreputable of +conditions in the eyes of such as would be helpless if they had +none. A rare philosopher for eyes capable of understanding him, he was +a despicable being in the eyes of the common man. To know a human +being one must be human--that is, the divine must be strong in him. + +For some days now, neither Clare nor Abdiel had come even within sight +of food enough to make a meal. The dog was rather thinner than his +master. + +"Abdiel," said Clare to him one day, "I fear you will soon be a +serpent! Your body gets longer and longer, and your legs get shorter +and shorter: you'll be crawling presently, rubbing the hair off your +useless little belly on the dusty road! Never mind, Abdiel; you'll be +a good serpent. Satan was turned into a bad serpent because he was a +bad angel; you will be a good serpent, because you are a good dog! I +hope, however, we shall yet put a stop to the serpent-business!" + +Abdiel wagged his tail, as much as to say, "All right, master!" + +The nights were now very cold; winter was coming fast. Had Clare been +long enough in one place for people to know him, he would never have +been allowed to go so cold and hungry; but he had always to move on, +and nobody had time to learn to care about him. So the terrible +sunless season threatened to wrap him in its winding-sheet, and lay +him down. + +One evening, just before sunset, grown sleepy in spite of the +gathering cold, he sat down on one of the two steep grassy slopes that +bordered the road. His feet were bare now, bare and brown, for his +shoes had come to such plight that it was a relief to throw them away; +but his soles had grown like leather. They rested in the dry shallow +rain-channel, and his body leaned back against the slope. Abdiel, +instead of jumping on the bank and lying in the soft grass, lay down +on the leathery feet, and covered them from the night with his long +faithful body and its coat of tangled hair. + +The sun was shooting his last radiance along the road, and its redness +caressed the sleeping companions, when an elderly lady came to her +gate at the top of the opposite slope, and looked along the road with +the sun. Her reverting glance fell upon the sleepers--the Knight of +Hope lying in rags, not marble, his feet not upon his dog, but his dog +upon his feet. It was a touching picture, and the old lady's heart was +one easily touched. She looked and saw that the face of the boy, whose +hunger was as plain as his rags, was calm as the wintry sky. She +wondered, but she needed not have wondered; for storm of anger, +drought of greed, nor rotting mist of selfishness, had passed or +rested there, to billow, or score, or waste. + +Her mere glance seemed to wake Abdiel, who took advantage of his +waking to have a lick at the brown, dusty, brave, uncomplaining feet, +so well used to the world's _via dolorosa_. She saw, and was touched +yet more by this ministration of the guardian of the feet. Gently +opening the gate she descended the slope, crossed the road, and stood +silent, regarding the outcasts. No cloudy blanket covered the sky: ere +morning the dew would lie frozen on the grass! + +"You shouldn't be sleeping there!" she said. + +Abdiel started to his four feet and would have snarled, but with one +look at the lady changed his mind. Clare half awoke, half sat up, made +an inarticulate murmur, and fell back again. + +"Get up, my boy," said the old lady. "You must indeed!" + +"Oh, please, ma'am, must I?" answered Clare, slowly rising to his +feet. "I had but just lain down, and I'm so tired!--If I mayn't sleep +_there_," he continued, "where _am_ I to sleep?--Please, ma'am, why is +everybody so set against letting a boy sleep? It don't cost them +anything! I can understand not giving him work, if he looks too much +in want of it; but why should they count it bad of him to lie down and +sleep?" + +The lady wisely let him talk; not until he stopped did she answer him. + +"It's because of the frost, my boy!" she said. "It would be the death +of you to sleep out of doors to-night!" + +"It's a nice place for it, ma'am!" + +"To sleep in? Certainly not!" + +"I didn't mean that, ma'am. I meant a nice place to go away from--to +die in, ma'am!" + +"That is not ours to choose," answered the old lady severely, but the +tone of her severity trembled. + +"I sha'n't find anywhere so nice as this bank," said Clare, turning +and looking at it sorrowfully. + +"There are plenty of places in the town. It's but a mile farther on!" + +"But this is so much nicer, ma'am! And I've no money--none at all, +ma'am. When I came out of prison,--" + +"Came out of _where_?" + +"Out of prison, ma'am." + +He had never been in prison in a legal sense, never having been +convicted of anything; but he did not know the difference between +detention and imprisonment. + +"Prison!" she exclaimed, holding up her hands in horror. "How dare you +mention prison!" + +"Because I was in it, ma'am." + +"And to say it so coolly too! Are you not ashamed of yourself?" + +"No, ma'am." + +"It's a shame to have been in prison." + +"Not if I didn't do anything wrong." + +"Nobody will believe that, I'm afraid!" + +"I suppose not, ma'am! I used to feel very angry when people wouldn't +believe me, but now I see they are not to blame. And now I've got used +to it, and it don't hurt so much.--But," he added with a sigh, "the +worst of it is, they won't give me any work!" + +"Do you always tell people you've come out of prison?" + +"Yes, ma'am, when I think of it." + +"Then you can't wonder they won't give you work!" + +"I don't, ma'am--not now. It seems a law of the universe!" + +"Not of the universe, I think--but of this world--perhaps!" said the +old lady thoughtfully. + +"But there's one thing I do wonder at," said Clare. "When I say I've +been in prison, they believe me; but when I say I haven't done +anything wrong, then they mock me, and seem quite amused at being +expected to believe that. I can't get at it!" + +"I daresay! But people will always believe you against yourself.--What +are you going to do, then, if nobody will give you work? You can't +starve!" + +"Indeed I _can_, ma'am! It's just the one thing I've got to do. We've +been pretty near the last of it sometimes--me and Abdiel! Haven't we, +Abby?" + +The dog wagged his tail, and the old lady turned aside to control her +feelings. + +"Don't cry, ma'am," said Clare; "I don't mind it--not _much_. I'm too +glad I didn't _do_ anything, to mind it much! Why should I! Ought I to +mind it much, ma'am? Jesus Christ hadn't done anything, and they +killed _him_! I don't fancy it's so very bad to die of only hunger! +But we'll soon see!--Sha'n't we, Abby?" + +Again the dog wagged his tail. + +"If you didn't do anything wrong, what _did_ you do?" said the old +lady, almost at her wits' end. + +"I don't like telling things that are not going to be believed. It's +like washing your face with ink!" + +"I will _try_ to believe you." + +"Then I will tell you; for you speak the truth, ma'am, and so, +perhaps, will be able to believe the truth!" + +"How do you know I speak the truth?" + +"Because you didn't say, 'I will believe you.' Nobody can be sure of +doing that. But you can be sure of _trying_; and you said, 'I will +_try_ to believe you.'" + +"Tell me all about it then." + +"I will, ma'am.--The policeman came in the middle of the night when we +were asleep, and took us all away, because we were in a house that was +not ours." + +"Whose was it then?" + +"Nobody knew. It was what they call in chancery. There was nobody in +it but moths and flies and spiders and rats;--though I think the rats +only came to eat baby." + +"Baby! Then the whole family of you, father, mother, and all, were +taken to prison!" + +"No, ma'am; my fathers and my mothers were taken up into the dome of +the angels."--What with hunger and sleepiness, Clare was talking like +a child.--"I haven't any father and mother in this world. I have two +fathers and two mothers up there, and one mother in this world. She's +the mother of the wild beasts." + +The old lady began to doubt the boy's sanity, but she went on +questioning him. + +"How did you have a baby with you, then?" + +"The baby was my own, ma'am. I took her out of the water-butt." + +Once more Clare had to tell his story--from the time, that is, when +his adoptive father and mother died. He told it in such a simple +matter-of-fact way, yet with such quaint remarks, from their very +simplicity difficult to understand, that, if the old lady, for all her +trying, was not able quite to believe his tale, it was because she +doubted whether the boy was not one of God's innocents, with an +angel-haunted brain. + +"And what's become of Tommy?" she asked. + +"He's in the same workhouse with baby. I'm very glad; for what I +should have done with Tommy, and nothing to give him to eat, I can't +think. He would have been sure to steal! I couldn't have kept him from +it!" + +"You must be more careful of your company." + +"Please, ma'am, I was very careful of Tommy. He had the best company I +could give him: I did try to be better for Tommy's sake. But my trying +wasn't much use to Tommy, so long as he wouldn't try! He was a little +better, though, I think; and if I had him now, and could give him +plenty to eat, and had baby as well as Abdiel to help me, we might +make something of Tommy, I think.--_You_ think so--don't you, Abdiel?" + +The dog, who had stood looking in his master's face all the time he +spoke, wagged his tail faster. + +"What a name to give a dog! Where did you find it?" + +"In Paradise Lost, ma'am. Abdiel was the one angel, you remember, +ma'am, who, when he saw what Satan was up to, left him, and went back +to his duty." + +"And what was his duty?" + +"Why of course to do what God told him. I love Abdiel, and because I +love the little dog and he took care of baby, I call him Abdiel +too. Heaven is so far off that it makes no confusion to have the same +name." + +"But how dare you give the name of an angel to a dog?" + +"To a _good_ dog, ma'am! A good dog is good enough to go with any +angel--at his heels of course! If he had been a bad dog, it would have +been wicked to name him after a good angel. If the dog had been +Tommy--I mean if Tommy had been the dog, I should have had to call him +Moloch, or Belzebub! God made the angels and the dogs; and if the dogs +are good, God loves them.--Don't he, Abdiel?" + +Abdiel assented after his usual fashion. The lady said nothing. Clare +went on. + +"Abdiel won't mind--the angel Abdiel, I mean, ma'am--he won't mind +lending his name to my friend. The dog will have a name of his own, +perhaps, some day--like the rest of us!" + +"What is _your_ name?" + +"The name I have now is, like the dog's, a borrowed one. I shall get +my own one day--not here--but there--when--when--I'm hungry enough to +go and find it." + +Clare had grown very white. He sat down, and lay back on the grass. He +had talked more in those few minutes than for weeks, and want had made +him weak. He felt very faint. The dog jumped up, and fell to licking +his face. + +"What a wicked old woman I am!" said the lady to herself, and ran +across the road like some little long-legged bird, and climbed the +bank swiftly. + +She disappeared within the gate, but to return presently with a +tumbler of milk and a huge piece of bread. + +"Here, boy!" she cried; "here is medicine for you! Make haste and take +it." + +Clare sat up feebly, and stared at the tumbler for a moment. Either he +could hardly believe his eyes, or was too sick to take it at +once. When he had it in his hand, he held it out to the dog. + +"Here, Abdiel, have a little," he said. + +This offended the old lady. + +"You're never going to give the dog that good milk!" she cried. + +"A little of it, please, ma'am!" + +"--And feed him out of the tumbler too?" + +"He's had nothing to-day, ma'am, and we're comrades!" + +"But it's not clean of you!" + +"Ah, you don't know dogs, ma'am! His tongue is clean as clean as +anybody's." + +Abdiel took three or four little laps of the milk, drew away, and +looked up at his master--as much as to say, "You, now!" + +"Besides," Clare went on, "he couldn't get at it so well in the bottom +of the tumbler." + +With that he raised it to his own lips, drank eagerly, and set it on +the road half empty, looking his thanks to the giver with a smile she +thought heavenly. Then he broke the bread, and giving the dog nearly +the half of it, began to eat the rest himself. The old lady stood +looking on in silence, pondering what she was to do with the celestial +beggar. + +"Would you mind sleeping in the greenhouse, if I had a bed put up for +you?" she said at length, in tone apologetic. + +"This is a better place--though I wish it was warmer!" said Clare, +with another smile as he looked up at the sky, in which a few stars +were beginning to twinkle, and thought of the gardeners he had +met. "--Don't you think it better, ma'am?" + +"No, indeed, I don't!" she answered crossly; for to her the open air +at night seemed wrong, disreputable. There was something unholy in it! + +"I would rather stay here," said Clare. + +"Why?" + +"Because you don't quite believe me, ma'am. You can't; and you can't +help it. You wouldn't be able to sleep for thinking that a boy just +out of prison was lying in the greenhouse. There would be no saying +what he might not do! I once read in a newspaper how an old lady took +a lad into her house for a servant, and he murdered her!--No, ma'am, +thank you! After such a supper we shall sleep beautifully!--Sha'n't +we, Abby? And then, perhaps, you could give me a job in the garden +to-morrow! I daresay the gardener wants a little help sometimes! But +if he knew me to have slept in the greenhouse, he would hate me." + +The old lady said nothing, for, like most old ladies, she feared her +gardener. She took the tumbler from the boy's hand, and went into the +house. But in two minutes she came again, with another great piece of +bread for Clare, and a bone with something on it which she threw to +Abdiel. The dog's ears started up, erect and alive, like individual +creatures, and his eyes gleamed; but he looked at his master, and +would not touch the bone without his leave--which given, he fell upon +it, and worried it as if it had been a rat. + +Clare was now himself again, and when the old lady left them for the +third time, he walked with her across the way, bread in hand, to open +the gate for her. When she was inside, he took off his cap, and bade +her good-night with a grace that won all that was left to be won of +her heart. + +Before she had taken three steps from the gate, the old lady turned. + +"Boy!" she called; and Clare, who was making for his couch under the +stars, hastened back at the sound of her voice. + +"I shall not be able to sleep," she said, "for thinking of you out +there in the bleak night!" + +"I am used to it, ma'am!" + +"Oh, I daresay! but you see I'm not! and I don't like the thought of +it! You may like hoarfrost-sheets, for what I know, but I don't! You +may like the stars for a tester--because you want to die and go to +them, I suppose!--but I have no fancy for the stars! You are a foolish +fellow, and I am out of temper with you. You don't give a thought to +me--or to my feelings if you should die! I should never go to bed +again with a good conscience!--Besides, I should have to nurse you!" + +The last member of her expostulation was hardly in logical sequence, +but it had not the less influence on Clare for that. + +"I will do whatever you please, ma'am," he answered humbly. "--Come, +Abdiel!" + +The dog came running across the road with his bone in his mouth. + +"You mustn't bring that inside the gate, Ab!" said Clare. + +The dog dropped it. + +"Good dog! It's a lady's garden, you know, Abdiel!" Then turning to +his hostess, Clare added, "I always tell him when I'm pleased with +him: don't you think it right, ma'am?" + +"I daresay! I don't know anything about dogs." + +"If you had a dog like Abdiel, he would soon teach you dogs, ma'am!" +rejoined Clare. + +By this time they were at the house-door. The lady told him to wait +there, went in, and had a talk with her two maids. In half an hour, +Clare and his four-footed angel were asleep--in an outhouse, it is +true, but in a comfortable bed, such as they had not seen since their +flight from the caravans. The cold breeze wandered moaning like a lost +thing round the bare walls, as if every time it woke, it went abroad +to see if there was any hope for the world; but it did not touch them; +and if through their ears it got into their dreams, it made their +sleep the sweeter, and their sense of refuge the deeper. + +But although the bewitching boy and his good dog were not lying in the +open air over against her gate, and although never a thought of murder +or theft came to trouble her, it was long before the old lady found +repose. Her heart had been deeply touched. + + + +Chapter LIII. + +The gardener. + + +From the fact that his hostess made him no answer when he breathed the +hope of a job in her garden, Clare concluded that he had presumed in +suggesting the thing to her, and that she would be relieved by their +departure. When he woke in the morning, therefore, early after a grand +sleep, he felt he had no right to linger: he had been invited to +sleep, and he had slept! He also shrank from the idea of being +supposed to expect his breakfast before he went. So, as soon as he got +up, he walked out of the gate, crossed the road, and sat down on the +spot he had occupied the night before, there to wait until the house +should be astir. For, although he could not linger within gates where +he was unknown, neither could he slink away without morning-thanks for +the gift of a warm night. + +As he sat, he grew drowsy, and leaning back, fell fast asleep. + +The thoughts of his hostess had been running on very different lines, +and she woke with feelings concerning the pauper very different from +those the pauper imagined in her. She must do something for him; she +must give or get him work! As to giving him work, her difficulty lay +in the gardener. She resolved, however, to attempt over-coming it. + +She rose earlier than usual, therefore, and as the man, who did not +sleep in the house, was not yet come, she went down to the gate to +meet him and have the thing over--so eager was she, and so nervous in +prospect of such an interview with her dreaded servant. + +"Good gracious!" she murmured aloud, "does it rain beggars?" For +there, on the same spot, lay another beggar, another boy, with a dog +in his bosom the facsimile of the ugly white thing named after +Milton's angel! She did not feel moved to go and make his +acquaintance. It could not be another of the family, could it? that +had already heard of his brother's good luck, and come to see whether +there might not be a picking for him too! She turned away hurriedly +lest he should wake, and went back to the house. + +But looking behind her as she mounted the steps, she caught sight of +the gardener at the other gate, casting a displeased look across the +road before he entered: he did not like to see tramps about! Her heart +sank a little, but she was not to be turned aside. + +The gardener came in, and his mistress joined him and walked with him +to his work, telling him as much as she thought fit concerning the +boy, and interspersing her narrative with hints of the duty of giving +every one a chance. She took care not to mention that he had come out +of a prison somewhere. + +"No one should be driven to despair," she said, little thinking she +used almost the very words of the Lord, according to the Sinaitic +reading of a passage in St. Luke's gospel. + +The argument had little force with the rough Scotchman: his mistress +was soft-hearted! He shook his head ominously at the idea of giving a +tramp the chance of doing decent work, but at last consented, with a +show of being over-persuaded to an imprudent action, to let the boy +help him for a day, and see how he got on, stipulating, however, that +he should not be supposed to have pledged himself to anything. + +Miss Tempest's plans went beyond the gardener's scope. She had for +some months been inclined to have a boy to help in the house--an +inclination justified by a late unexpected accession of income: if +this boy were what he seemed, he would make a more than valuable +servant; and nothing could clear her judgment of him better, she +thought, than putting him to the test of a brief subjection to the +cross-grained, exacting Scotchman. By that she would soon know whether +to dismiss him, or venture with him farther! + +She had but just wrung his hard consent from the gardener, when the +cook came running, to say the boy was gone. Upon poor Miss Tempest's +heart fell a cold avalanche. + +"But we've counted the spoons, ma'am, and they're all right!" said the +cook. + +This additional statement, however, did not seem to give much +consolation to the benevolent old lady. She stood for a moment with +her eyes on the ground, too pained to move or speak. Then she started, +and ran to the gate. The cook ran after, thinking her mistress gone +out of her mind--and was sure of it when she saw her open the gate, +and run straight down the bank to the road. But when she reached the +gate herself, she saw her standing over a boy asleep on the grass of +the opposite bank. + +Abdiel, lying on his bosom, watched her with keen friendly eyes. Clare +was dreaming some agreeable morning-dream; for a smile of such +pleasure as could haunt only an innocent face, nickered on it like a +sunny ripple on the still water of a pool. + +"No!" said Miss Tempest to herself; "there's no duplicity there! +Otherwise, a tree is not known by its fruit!" + +Clare opened his eyes, and started lightly to his feet, strong and +refreshed. + +"Good morning, ma'am!" he said, pulling off his cap. + +"Good morning--what am I to call you?" she returned. + +"Clare, if you please, ma'am." + +"What is your Christian name?" + +"That is my Christian name, ma'am--Clare." + +"Then what is your surname?" + +"I am called Porson, ma'am, but I have another name. Mr. Porson +adopted me." + +"What is your other name?" + +"I don't know, ma'am. I am going to know one day, I think; but the day +is not come yet." + +He told her all he could about his adoptive parents, and little Maly; +but the time before he went to the farm was growing strangely +dreamlike, as if it had sunk a long way down in the dark waters of the +past--all up to the hour when Maly was carried away by the long black +aunt. + +The story accounted to Miss Tempest both for his good speech and the +name of his dog. The adopted child of a clergyman might well be +acquainted with _Paradise Lost_, though she herself had never read +more of it than the apostrophe to Light in the beginning of the third +book! That she had learned at school without understanding phrase or +sentence of it; while Clare never left passage alone until he +understood it, or, failing that, had invented a meaning for it. + +"Well, then, Clare, I've been talking to my gardener about you," said +Miss Tempest. "He will give you a job." + +"God bless you, ma'am! I'm ready!" cried Clare, stretching out his +arms, as if to get them to the proper length for work. "Where shall I +find him?" + +"You must have breakfast first." + +She led the way to the kitchen. + +The cook, a middle-aged woman, looked at the dog, and her face +puckered all over with points of interrogation and exclamation. + +"Please, cook, will you give this young man some breakfast? He wanted +to go to work without any, but that wouldn't do--would it, cook?" said +her mistress. + +"I hope the dog won't be running in and out of my kitchen all day, +ma'am!" + +"No fear of that, cook!" said Clare; "he never leaves me." + +"Then I don't think--I'm afraid," she began, and stopped. "--But +that's none of my business," she added. "John will look after his +own--and more!" + +Miss Tempest said nothing, but she almost trembled; for John, she +knew, had a perfect hatred of dogs. Nor could anyone wonder, for, gate +open or gate shut, in they came and ran over his beds. She dared not +interfere! He and Clare must settle the question of Abdiel or no +Abdiel between them! She left the kitchen. + +The cook threw the dog a crust of bread, and Abdiel, after a look at +his master, fell upon it with his white, hungry little teeth. Then she +proceeded to make a cup of coffee for Clare, casting an occasional +glance of pity at his garments, so miserably worn and rent, and his +brown bare feet. + +"How on the face of this blessed world, boy, do you expect to work in +the garden without shoes?" she said at length. + +"Most things I can do well enough without them," answered Clare; +"--even digging, if the ground is not very hard. My feet used to be +soft, but now the soles of them are like leather.--They've grown their +own shoes," he added, with a smile, and looked straight in her eyes. + +The smile and the look went far to win her heart, as they had won that +of her mistress: she felt them true, and wondered how such a +fair-spoken, sweet-faced boy could be on the tramp. She poured him out +a huge cup of coffee, fried him a piece of bacon, and cut him as much +bread and butter as he could dispose of. He had not often eaten +anything but dry bread, in general very dry, since he left the +menagerie, and now felt feasted like an emperor. Pleased with the +master, the cook fed the dog with equal liberality; and then, curious +to witness their reception by John, between whom and herself was +continuous feud, she conducted Clare to the gardener. From a distance +he saw them coming. With look irate fixed upon the dog, he started to +meet them. Clare knew too well the meaning of that look, and saw in +him Satan regarding Abdiel with eye of fire, and the words on his +lips-- + + "And fly, ere evil intercept thy flight." + +The moment he came near enough, without word, or show of malice beyond +what lay in his eye, he made, with the sharp hoe he carried, a sudden +downstroke at the faithful angel, thinking to serve him as Gabriel +served Moloch. But Abdiel was too quick for him: he had read danger in +his very gait the moment he saw him move, and enmity in his eyes when +he came nearer. He kept therefore his own eyes on the hoe, and never +moved until the moment of attack. Then he darted aside. The weapon +therefore came down on the hard gravel, jarring the arm of his +treacherous enemy. With a muttered curse John followed him and made +another attempt, which Abdiel in like manner eluded. John followed and +followed; Abdiel fled and fled--never farther than a few yards, +seeming almost to entice the man's pursuit, sometimes pirouetting on +his hind legs to escape the blows which the gardener, growing more and +more furious with failure, went on aiming at him. Fruitlessly did +Clare assure him that neither would the dog do any harm, nor allow any +one to hit him. It was from very weariness that at last he desisted, +and wiping his forehead with his shirt-sleeve, turned upon Clare in +the smothered wrath that knows itself ridiculous. For all the time the +cook stood by, shaking with delighted laughter at his every fresh +discomfiture. + +"Awa', ye deil's buckie," he cried, "an tak' the little Sawtan wi' ye! +Dinna lat me see yer face again." + +"But the lady told me you would give me a job!" said Clare. + +"I didna tell her I wad gie yer tyke a job! I wad though, gien he wad +lat me!" + +"He's given you a stiff one!" said the cook, and laughed again. + +The gardener took no notice of her remark. + +"Awa' wi' ye!" he cried again, yet more wrathfully, "--or--" + +He raised his hand. + +Clare looked in his eyes and did not budge. + +"For shame, John!" expostulated the cook. "Would you strike a child?" + +"I'm no child, cook!" said Clare. "He can't hurt me much. I've had a +good breakfast!" + +"Lat 'im tak' awa' that deevil o' a tyke o' his, as I tauld him," +thundered the gardener, "or I'll mak' a pulp o' 'im!" + +"I've had such a breakfast, sir, as I'm bound to give a whole day's +work in return for," said Clare, looking up at the angry man; "and I +won't stir till I've done it. Stolen food on my stomach would turn me +sick!" + +"Gien it did, it wadna be the first time, I reckon!" said the +gardener. + +"It _would_ be the first time!" returned Clara "You are very rude.--If +Abdiel understood Scotch, he would bite you," he added, as the dog, +hearing his master speak angrily, came up, ears erect, and took his +place at his side, ready for combat. + +"Ye'll hae to tak' some ither mode o' payin' the debt!" said John. +"Stick spaud in yird here, ye sall not! You or I maun flit first!" + +With that he walked slowly away, shouldering his hoe. + +"Come, Abdiel," said Clare; "we must go and tell Miss Tempest! Perhaps +she'll find something else for us to do. If she can't, she'll forgive +us our breakfast, and we'll be off on the tramp again. I thought we +were going to have a day's rest--I mean work; that's the rest we want! +But this man is an enemy to the poor." + +The gardener half turned, as if he would speak, but changed his mind +and went his way. + +"Never mind John!" said the cook, loud enough for John to hear. "He's +an old curmudgeon as can't sleep o' nights for quarrellin' inside +him. I'll go to mis'ess, and you go and sit down in the kitchen till I +come to you." + + + +Chapter LIV. + +The Kitchen. + + +Clare went into the kitchen, and sat down. The housemaid came in, and +stood for a moment looking at him. Then she asked him what he wanted +there. + +"Cook told me to wait here," he answered. + +"Wait for what?" + +"Till she came to me. She's gone to speak to Miss Tempest." + +"I won't have that dog here." + +"When I had a home," remarked Clare, "our servant said the cook was +queen of the kitchen: I don't want to be rude, ma'am, but I must do as +she told me." + +"She never told you to bring that mangy animal in here!" + +"She knew he would follow me, and she said nothing about him. But he's +not mangy. He hasn't enough to eat to be mangy. He's as lean as a +dried fish!" + +The housemaid, being fat, was inclined to think the remark personal; +but Clare looked up at her with such clear, honest, simple eyes, that +she forgot the notion, and thought what a wonderfully nice boy he +looked. + +"He's shamefully poor, though! His clothes ain't even decent!" she +remarked to herself. + +And certainly the white skin did look through in several places. + +"You won't let him put his nose in anything, will you?" she said quite +gently, returning his smile with a very pleasant one of her own. + +"Abdiel is too much of a gentleman to do it," he answered. + +"A dog a gentleman!" rejoined the housemaid with a merry laugh, +willing to draw him out. + +"Abdiel can be hungry and not greedy," answered Clare, and the young +woman was silent. + +Miss Tempest and Mrs. Mereweather had all this time been turning over +the question of what was to be done with the strange boy. They agreed +it was too bad that anyone willing to work should be prevented from +earning even a day's victuals by the bad temper of a gardener. But his +mistress did not want to send the man away. She had found him +scrupulously honest, as is many a bad-tempered man, and she did not +like changes. The cook on her part had taken such a fancy to Clare +that she did not want him set to garden-work; she would have him at +once into the house, and begin training him for a page. Now Miss +Tempest was greatly desiring the same thing, but in dread of what the +cook would say, and was delighted, therefore, when the first +suggestion of it came from Mrs. Mereweather herself. The only obstacle +in the cook's eyes was that same long, spectral dog. The boy could not +be such a fool, however,--she said, not being a lover of animals--as +let a wretched beast like that come betwixt him and a good situation! + +"It's all right, Clare," said Mrs. Mereweather, entering her queendom +so radiant within that she could not repress the outshine of her +pleasure. "Mis'ess an' me, we've arranged it all. You're to help me in +the kitchen; an' if you can do what you're told, an' are willin' to +learn, we'll soon get you out of your troubles. There's but one thing +in the way." + +"What is it, please?" asked Clare. + +"The dog, of course! You must part with the dog." + +"That I cannot do," returned Clare quietly, but with countenance +fallen and sorrowful. "--Come, Abdiel!" + +The dog started up, every hair of him full of electric vitality. + +"You don't mean you're going to walk yourself off in such a beastly +ungrateful fashion--an' all for a miserable cur!" exclaimed the cook. + +"The lady has been most kind to us, and we're grateful to her, and +ready to work for her if she will let us;--ain't we, Abdiel? But +Abdiel has done far more for me than Miss Tempest! To part with +Abdiel, and leave him to starve, or get into bad company, would be +sheer ingratitude. I should be a creature such as Miss Tempest ought +to have nothing to do with: I might serve her as that young butler I +told her of! It's just as bad to be ungrateful to a dog as to any +other person. Besides, he wouldn't leave me. He would be always +hanging about." + +"John would soon knock him on the head." + +"Would he, Abdiel?" said Clare. + +The dog looked up in his master's face with such a comical answer in +his own, that the cook burst out laughing, and began to like Abdiel. + +"But you don't really mean to say," she persisted, "that you'd go off +again on the tramp, to be as cold and hungry again to-morrow as you +were yesterday--and all for the sake of a dog? A dog ain't a +Christian!" + +"Abdiel's more of a Christian than some I know," answered Clare: "he +does what his master tells him." + +"There's something in that!" said the cook. + +"If I parted with Abdiel, I could never hold up my head among the +angels," insisted Clare. "Think what harm it might do him! He could +trust nobody after, his goodness might give way! He might grow worse +than Tommy!--No; I've got to take care of Abdiel, and Abdiel's got to +take care of me!--'Ain't you, Abby?" + +"We can't have him here in the kitchen nohow!" said the cook in +relenting tone. + +"Poor fellow!" said the housemaid kindly. + +The dog turned to her and wagged his tail + +"What wouldn't I give for a lover like that!" said the housemaid--but +whether of Clare or the dog I cannot say. + +"I know what I shall do!" cried Clare, in sudden resolve. "I will ask +Miss Tempest to have him up-stairs with her, and when she is tired of +either of us, we will go away together." + +"A probable thing!" returned the cook. "A lady like Miss Tempest with +a dog like that about her! She'd be eaten up alive with fleas! In ten +minutes she would!" + +"No fear of that!" rejoined Clare. "Abdiel catches all his _own_ +fleas!--Don't you, Abby?" + +The dog instantly began to burrow in his fell of hair--an answer which +might be taken either of two ways: it might indicate comprehension and +corroboration of his master, or the necessity for a fresh hunt. The +women laughed, much amused. + +"Look here!" said Clare. "Let me have a tub of water--warm, if you +please--he likes that: I tried him once, passing a factory, where a +lot of it was running to waste. Then, with the help of a bit of soap, +I'll show you a body of hair to astonish you." + +"What breed is he?" asked the housemaid. + +"He's all the true breeds under the sun, I fancy," returned his +master; "but the most of him seems of the sky-blue terrier sort." + +The more they talked with Clare, the better the women liked him. They +got him a tub and plenty of warm water. Abdiel was nothing loath to be +plunged in, and Clare washed him thoroughly. Taken out and dried, he +seemed no more for a lady's chamber unmeet. + +"Now," said Clare, "will you please ask Miss Tempest if I may bring +him on to the lawn, and show her some of his tricks?" + +The good lady was much pleased with the cleverness and instant +obedience of the little animal. Clare proposed that she should keep +him by her. + +"But will he stay with me? and will he do what _I_ tell him?" she +asked. + +Clare took the dog aside, and talked to him. He told him what he was +going to do, and what he expected of him. How much Abdiel understood, +who can tell! but when his master laid him down at Miss Tempest's +feet, there he lay; and when Clare went with the cook, he did not +move, though he cast many a wistful glance after the lord of his +heart. When his new mistress went into the house, he followed her +submissively, his head hanging, and his tail motionless. He soon +recovered his cheerfulness, however, and seemed to know that his +friend had not abandoned him. + + + +Chapter LV. + +The wheel rests for a time. + + +That part of the human race which is fond of dolls, may now imagine +the pleasure of the cook in going to the town in the omnibus to buy +everything for a live doll so big as Clare! In a very few days she had +him dressed to her heart's content, and the satisfaction of her +mistress, who would not have him in livery, but in a plain suit of +dark blue cloth: for she loved blue, all her men-people being, or +having been in the navy. Thus dressed, he looked as much of a +gentleman as before: his look of refinement had owed nothing to the +contrast of his rags. Better clothes make not a few seem commoner. + +When Mrs. Mereweather came back from the town the first day, she found +that the ragged boy had got her kitchen and scullery as nice and +clean, and everything as ready to her hand, as if she had got her work +done before she went, which the omnibus would not permit. This +rejoiced her much; but being a woman of experience, she continued a +little anxious lest his sweet ways should go after his rags, lest his +new garments should breed bumptiousness and bad manners. For such a +change is no unfrequent result of prosperity. But such had been +Mr. Porson's teaching and example, such Mrs. Person's management, and +such the responsiveness of the boy's disposition, that the thought +never came to him whether this or that was a thing fit for him to do: +if the thing was a right thing, and had to be done, why should not he +do it as well as another! To earn his own and Abdiel's bread, he would +do anything honest, setting up his back at nothing. But when about a +thing, he forgot even his obligation to do it, in the glad endeavour +to do it well. + +As the days went on, Mrs. Mereweather was not once disappointed in +him. He did everything with such a will that both she and the +housemaid were always ready to spare and help him. Very soon they +began to grow tender over him; and on pretence of his being the +earlier drest to open the door, did certain things themselves which he +had been quite content to do, but which they did not like seeing him +do. Many--I am afraid most boys would have presumed on their +generosity, but Clare was nowise injured by it. + +Nothing could be kinder than the way his mistress treated him. Having +lent him some books, and at once perceived that he was careful of +them, she let him have the run of her library when his day's work was +over. For he not only read but respected books. Nothing shows +vulgarity more than the way in which some people treat books. No +gentleman would write his remarks on the margins of another person's +book; no lady would brush her hair as she read one of her own. + +From hungry days and cold nights, Clare and Abdiel found themselves +_in clover_--the phrase surely of some lover of cows!--and they were +more than content. Clare had longed so much for work, and had for so +many a weary day sought it in vain, that he valued it now just because +it was work. And he seemed to know instinctively that a man ranks, not +according to the thing he does, but according to the way he does +it. In life it is far higher to do an inferior thing well than to do a +superior thing passably. + +Clare made good use of his privileges, and read much, educating +himself none the worse that he did it unconsciously. He read whatever +came in his way. He read really--not as most people read, leaving the +sentences behind them like so many unbroken nuts, the kernel of whose +meaning they have not seen. He learned more than most boys at school, +more even than most young men at college; for it is not what one +knows, but what one uses, that is the true measure of learning. +Whatever he read, he read from the point of practice. In history or +romance he saw--not merely what a man ought to be or do, but what he +himself must, at that moment, be or do. There is a very common sort of +man calling himself practical, but neglecting to practise the most +important things, who would laugh at the idea of Clare being +practical, seeing he did not trouble his head about money, or "getting +on in the world"--what servants call "bettering themselves;" but such +a practical man will find he has been but a practical fool. Clare took +heed to do what was right, and grow a better man. Such a life is the +only really practical one. + +People wondered how Miss Tempest had managed to get hold of such a +nice-looking page, and the good lady was flattered by their +wonder. But she knew the world too well to be sure of him yet. She +knew that it is difficult, in the human tree, to distinguish between +blossom and fruit. Deeds of lovely impulse are the blossom; unvarying, +determined Tightness is the fruit. + + + +Chapter LVI. + +Strategy. + + +Miss Tempest was the last of an old family, with scarce a relation, +and no near one, in the world. Hence the pieces of personal property +that had continued in the possession of various branches of the family +after land and money, through fault or misfortune, were gone, had +mostly drifted into the small pool of Miss Tempest's life now slowly +sinking in the sands of time, there to gleam and sparkle out their +tale of its old splendour. She did not think often of their +money-worth: had she done so, she would have kept them at her +banker's; but she valued them greatly both for their beauty and their +associations, constantly using as many of them as she could. More than +one of her friends had repeatedly tried to persuade her that it was +not prudent to have so much plate and so many jewels in the house, for +the fact was sure to be known where it was least desirable it should: +she always said she would think about it. At times she would for a +moment contemplate sending her valuables to the bank; but her next +thought--by no means an unwise one--would always be, "Of what use will +they be at the bank? I might as well not have them at all! Better sell +them and do some good with the money!--No; I must have them about me!" + +There are predatory persons in every large town, who either know or +are learning to know the houses in it worth the risk of robbing. When +it falls to the lot of this or that house to be attempted, one of the +gang will make the acquaintance of some servant in it, with the object +of discovering beforehand where its treasure lies, and so reducing the +time to be spent in it, and the risk of frustration or capture. Often +they seduce one of the household to let them in, or hand out the +things they want. Any such gang, however, must soon have become +convinced that at Miss Tempest's corruption was impossible, and that +they could avail themselves solely of their own internal resources. + +It was well now for Miss Tempest that she was so faithful herself as +to encourage faithfulness in others: gladly would she have had Abdiel +sleep in her room, but she would not take the pleasure of his company +from his old master and companion in suffering. The dog therefore +slept on Clare's bed, just as he did when the bed was as hard to +define as to lie upon, only now he had to take the part neither of +blanket nor hot bottle. + +One night, about half-past twelve, watchful even in slumber, he sprang +up in his lair at his master's feet, listened a moment, gave a low +growl, again listened, and gave another growl. Clare woke, and found +his bed trembling with the tremor of his little four-footed +guardian. Telling him to keep quiet, he rose on his elbow, and in his +turn listened, but could hear nothing. He thought then he would light +his candle and go down, but concluded it wiser to descend without a +light, and listen under cloak of the darkness. If he could but save +Miss Tempest from a fright! He crept out of bed, and went first to the +window--a small one in the narrowing of the gable-wall of his attic +room: the night was warm, and, loving the night air, he had it +open. Hearkening there for a moment, he thought he heard a slight +movement below. Very softly he put out his head, and looked +down. There was no moon, but in the momentary flash of a lantern he +caught sight of a small pair of legs disappearing inside the scullery +window, which was almost under his own. Swift and noiseless he hurried +down, and reached the scullery door just in time for a little fellow +who came stealing out of it, to run against him. + +Now Clare had heard the housemaid read enough from the newspapers to +guess, the moment he looked from the garret window, that the legs he +saw were those of a boy sent in to open a door or window, and when the +boy, feeling his way in the dark, came against him, he gripped him by +the throat with the squeeze that used to silence Tommy. The prowler +knew the squeeze. The moment Clare relaxed it, in a piping whisper +came the words, + +"Clare! Clare! they said they'd kill me if I didn't!" + +"Didn't what?" + +"Open the door to them." + +"If you utter one whimper, I'll throttle you," said Clare. + +He tightened his grasp for an instant, and Tommy, who had not +forgotten that what Clare said, he did, immediately gave in, and was +led away. Clare took him in his arms and carried him to his room, tied +him hand and foot, and left him on the floor, fast to the bedstead. +Then he crept swiftly to the servants' room, and with some difficulty +waking them, told them what he had done, and asked them to help him. + +Both women of sense and courage, they undertook at once to do their +part. But when he proposed that they should open a window, as if it +were done by Tommy, and so enticing the burglars to enter, secure the +first of them, they, naturally enough, and wisely too, declined to +encounter the risk. + +The burglars, perplexed by the lack of any sign from Tommy yet the +utter quiet of the house, concluded probably that he had fallen +somewhere, and was lying either insensible, or unable to move and +afraid to cry out--in which case they would be at the mercy of what he +might say when he was found. + +Those within could hear as little noise without. They went from door +to window, wherever an attempt might be made, but all was still. Then +it occurred to Clare that he had left the scullery window +unwatched. He hastened to it--and was but just in time: two long thin +legs were sticking through, and showed by their movements that +considerable effort was being made by the body that belonged to them, +to enter after them. Legs first was the wrong way, but the youth +feared the unknown fate of Tommy, and being pig-headed, would go that +way or not at all. + +A boy in courage equal to Clare, but of less coolness, would at once +have made war on the intrusive legs; but Clare bethought him that, so +long as that body filled the window, no other body could pass that +way; so it would be well to keep it there, a cork to the house, making +it like the nest of a trap-door-spider. He begged the women, +therefore, who had followed him, to lay hold each of an ankle, and +stick to it like a clamp, while he ran to get some string. + +The women, entering heartily into the business, held on bravely. The +owner of the legs made vigorous efforts to release them, more anxious +a good deal to get out than he had been to get in, but he was not very +strong, and had no scope. His accomplices laid hold of him and pulled; +then, with good mother-wit, the women pulled away from each other, and +so made of his legs a wedge. + +Clare came back with a piece of clothes-line, one end of which he +slipped with a running knot round one ankle, and the other in like +fashion round the other. Then he cut the line in halves, and drawing +them over two hooks in the ceiling, some distance apart, so that the +legs continued widespread like a V upside down, hauled the feet up as +high as he could, and fastened the ends of the lines. Hold lines and +hooks, it was now impossible to draw the fellow out. + +Leaving the women to watch, and telling them to keep a hand on each of +the lines because the scullery was pitch-dark, he went next to his +room and looked again from the window. He feared they might be trying +to get in at some other place, for they would not readily abandon +their accomplices, and doubtless knew what a small household it was! +He would see first, therefore, what was doing outside the scullery, +and then make a round of doors and windows! + +Right under him when he looked out, stood a short, burly figure; +another man was taking intermittent hauls at the arms of their +leg-tied companion, regardless of his stifled cries of pain when he +did so. Clare went and fetched his water-jug, which was half full, and +leaning out once more, with the jug upright in his two hands, moved it +this way and that until he had it, as nearly as he could determine, +just over the man beneath him, and then dropped it. The jug fell +plumb, and might have killed the man but that he bent his head at the +moment, and received it between his shoulders. It knocked the breath +out of him, and he lay motionless. The other man fled. The +window-stopper, hearing the crash of the jug, wrenched and kicked and +struggled, but in vain. There he had to wait the sunrise, for not a +moment sooner would the cook open the door. + +When they went out at last, the stout man too was gone. He had risen +and staggered into the shrubbery, and there fallen, but had risen once +more and got away. + +Their captive pretended to be all but dead, thinking to move their +pity and be set free. But Clare went to the next house and got the +man-servant there to go for the police, begging him to make haste: he +knew that his tender-hearted mistress, if she came down before the +police arrived, would certainly let the fellow go, and Tommy with him; +and he was determined the law should have its way if he could compass +it What hope was there for the wretched Tommy if he was allowed to +escape! And what right had they to let such people loose on their +neighbours! It was selfishness to indulge one's own pity to the danger +of others! He would be his brother's keeper by holding on to his +brother's enemy! + +Going at last to his room, he found Tommy asleep. The boy was better +dressed, but no cleaner than when first he knew him. Clare proceeded +to wash and dress. Tommy woke, and lay staring, but did not utter a +sound. + +"Have your sleep out," said Clare. "The police won't be here, I +daresay, for an hour yet." + +"I believe you!" returned Tommy, as impudent as ever. His +contemplation of Clare had revived his old contempt for him. "I mean +to go. I 'ain't done nothing." + +"Go, then," said Clare, and took no more heed of him. + +"If it's manners you want, Clare," resumed Tommy, "_please_ let me +go!" + +Clare turned and looked at him. The evil expression was hardened on +his countenance. He gave him no answer. + +"You ain't never agoin' to turn agin an old pal, aire you?" said +Tommy. + +"I ain't a pal of yours, Tommy, or of any other thief's!" answered +Clare. + +"I'll take my oath on it to the beak!" + +"You'll soon have the chance; I've sent for the police." Tommy changed +his tone. + +"Please, Clare, let me go," he whined. + +"I will not. I did what I could for you before, and I'll do what I can +for you now. You must go with the police." + +Tommy began to blubber, or pretend--Clare could not tell which. + +"This beastly string's a cuttin' into me!" he sobbed. + +Clare examined it, and found it easy enough. + +"I won't undo one knot," he answered, "until there's a policeman in +the room. If you make a noise, I will stuff your mouth." + +His dread was that his mistress might hear, and spoil all. "It's her +house," he said to himself, "but they're my captives!" + +Tommy lay still, and the police came. + +When they untied and drew out the cork of the scullery window, Clare +thought he had seen him before, but could not remember where. One of +the policemen, however, the moment his eyes fell on his face, cried +out joyfully, + +"Ah, ha, my beauty! I've been a lookin' for you!" + +"Never set eyes on ye afore," growled the fellow. + +"Don't ye say now ye ain't a dear friend o' mine," insisted the +policeman, "when I carry yer pictur' in my bosom!" + +He drew out a pocket-book, and from it a photograph, at which he gazed +with satisfaction, comparing it with the face before him. In another +moment Clare recognized the lad sent by Maidstone to exchange +band-boxes with him. + +"Her majesty the queen wants you for that robbery, you know!" said the +policeman. + +A boy who loved romance and generosity more than truth and +righteousness, would now have regretted the chance he had lost of +doing a fine action, and sought yet to set the rascal free. There are +men who cheat and make presents; there are men who are saints abroad +and churls at home, as Bunyan says; there are men who screw down the +wages of their clerks and leave vast sums to the poor; men who build +churches with the proceeds of drunkenness; men who promote bubble +companies and have prayers in their families morning and evening; men, +in a word, who can be very generous with what is not their own; for +nothing ill-gotten is a man's own any more than the money in a thief's +pocket: Clare was not of the contemptible order of the falsely +generous. + +Profiting, doubtless, by Maidstone's own example, the fellow had, as +Clare now learned, run away from his master, carrying with him the +contents of the till: whether he deserved punishment more than his +master, may be left undiscussed. + +When first Miss Tempest's friends heard of the attempt to break into +her house, they said--what could she expect if she took tramps into +her service! They were consider-ably astonished, however, when they +read in the newspaper the terms in which the magistrate had spoken of +the admirable courage and contrivance of Miss Tempest's page, and the +resolution with which the women of her household had seconded him. If +every third house were as well defended, he said, the crime of +burglary would disappear. + +After the trial, Clare begged and was granted an interview with the +magistrate. He told him what he knew about Tommy, and entreated he +might be sent to some reformatory, to be kept from bad company until +he was able to distinguish between right and wrong, which he thought +he hardly could at present The magistrate promised it should be done, +and with kind words dismissed him. + +Things returned to their old way at Miss Tempest's. Her friends never +doubted she would now at last commit her plate to her banker's strong +room, but they found themselves mistaken: she was convinced that, with +such servants and Abdiel, it was safe where it was. + +The leader of the gang, injured by Clare's water-jug, was soon after +captured, and the gang was broken up. + + + +Chapter LVII. + +Ann Shotover. + + +So void of self-assertion was Clare, so prompt at the call of whoever +needed him, so quiet yet so quick, so silent in his sympathetic +ministrations, so studious and so capable, that, after two years, Miss +Tempest began to feel she ought to do what she could to "advance his +prospects," even at the loss to herself of his services. + +He never came to regard Miss Tempest as he did the other women who had +saved him: he never thought of her as his fourth mother. Truly good +and kind she was, but she had a certain manner which prevented him +from feeling entirely comfortable with her. It did not escape him, +however, that Abdiel was thoroughly at his ease in her company; and he +believed therefore that the dog knew her better, or at least was more +just to her, than he. + +The fact was Miss Tempest kept down all her feelings, with a vague +sense that to show them would be to waste her substance: it was the +one shape that the yet lingering selfishness of a very unselfish +person took. Thus she kept him at a distance, and he stayed at a +distance, she on her part wondering that he did not open out to her +more, but neither doubting that all was right between them. Nothing, +indeed, was wrong--only they might have come a little nearer. Perhaps, +also, Miss Tempest was a little too conscious of being his patroness, +his earthly saviour. + +It was natural that, after the defeated robbery, Clare should become a +little known to the friends of the mistress he had so well served; +when, therefore, Miss Tempest spoke to her banker concerning the +ability of her page, mentioning that, in his spare time, he had been +reading hard, as well as attending an evening-school for mathematics, +where he gained much approbation from his master, she spoke of one +already known by him to one accustomed to regard character. + +The banker listened with a solemn listening from which she could not +tell what he was thinking. No one ever could tell what Mr. Shotover +was thinking: his face was not half a face; it was more a mask than a +face. High in the world's regard, rich, and of unquestioned integrity, +he was believed to have gathered a large fortune; but he kept his +affairs to himself. That he liked his own way so much as never to +yield it, I give up to the admiration of such as himself: often +kind--when the required mode of the kindness pleased him, a constant +church-goer and giver of money, always saying less the more he made up +his mind, he had generally no trouble in getting it. + +Priding himself on his moral discrimination, he had, now and then, as +suited his need, taken from a lower position a young man he thought +would serve his purpose, and modelled him to it. He had had his eye on +Clare ever since reading the magistrate's eulogy of his contrivance +and courage; but when Miss Tempest spoke, he had not made up his mind +about him, for something in the boy repelled him. He had scarcely +troubled himself to ask what it was, nor do I believe he could have +discovered, for the root of the repulsion lay in himself. + +Moved in part, however, by the representations of Miss Tempest, in +part also, I think, by a desire to discover that the boy was a +hypocrite, Mr. Shotover consented to give him a trial, whereupon Miss +Tempest made haste to disclose to her _proteg_ the grand thing she +had done for him. + +She was disappointed at the coolness and lack of interest with which +Clare heard her great news. She could not but be gratified that he did +not want to leave her, but she was annoyed that he seemed unaware of +any advantage to be gained in doing so--high as the social ascent from +servitude to clerkship would by most be considered. But Clare's +horizon was not that of the world. He had no inclination to more of +figures and less of persons. Miss Tempest, however, insisting that she +knew what was best for him, and what it was therefore his duty to do, +he listened in respectful silence to all she had to say. But what she +counted her most powerful argument--that he owed it to himself to rise +in the world--did not even touch him, did not move the slightest +response in a mind nobly devoid of ambition. Her argument was in truth +nonsense; for a man owes himself nothing, owes God everything, and +owes his neighbour whatever his own conscience goes on to require of +him for his neighbour. Feeling at the same time, however, that she had +a huge claim on his compliance with her wishes, Clare consented to +leave her kitchen for her friend's bank, where he had of course to +take the lowest position, one counted by the rest of the clerks, +especially the one just out of it, _menial_, requiring him to be in +the bank earlier by half an hour than the others, to be the last to go +away at night, and to sleep in the house--where a not uncomfortable +room in the attic story was appointed him. + +Mr. Shotover himself lived above the bank--with his family, consisting +of his wife and two daughters. Mrs. Shotover suffered from a terrible +disease--that of thinking herself ill when nothing was the matter with +her except her paramount interest in herself--the source of at least +half the incurable disease among idle people. The elder daughter was a +high-spirited girl about twenty, with a frank, friendly manner, +indicating what God meant her to be, not what she was, or had yet +chosen to be. She was not really frank, and seemed far more friendly +than she was, being more selfish than she knew, and far more selfish +than she seemed: she was merry, and that goes a great way in +seeming. Her mother spent no regard upon her; her heart was too full +of herself to have in it room for a grown-up daughter as well, with +interests of her own. The younger was a child about six, of whom the +mother took not so much care by half as a tigress of her cub. + +One morning, a little before eight o'clock, as Clare was coming down +from his room to open the windows of the bank, he just saved himself +from tumbling over something on the attic stair, which was dark, and +at that point took rather a sharp turn. The something was a child, who +gave a low cry, and started up to run away: there was not light enough +for either to discern easily what the other was like. But Clare, to +whom childhood was the strongest attraction he yet knew, bent down his +face from where he stood on the step above her, and its moonlight glow +of love and faith shone clear in the eyes of the little girl. The +moment she saw his smile, she knew the soul that was the light of the +smile, and her doll dropped from her hands as she raised them to lay +her arms gently about his neck. + +"Oh!" she said, "you're come!" + +He saw now, in the dusk, a pale, ordinary little face, with rather +large gray eyes, a rather characterless, tiny, up-turned nose, and a +rather pretty mouth. + +"Yes, little one. Were you expecting me?" he returned, with his arms +about her. + +"Yes," she answered, in the tone of one stating what the other must +know. + +"How was it I frightened you, then?" + +"Only at first I thought you was an ogre! That was before I saw +you. Then I knew!" + +"Who told you I was coming?" + +"Nobody. Nobody knew you was coming but me. I've known it--oh, for +such a time!--ever since I was born, I think!" + +She turned her head a little and looked down where the doll lay a step +or two below. + +"You can go now, dolly," she said. "I don't want you any more." Here +she paused a while, as if listening to a reply, then went on: "I am +much obliged to you, dolly; but what am I to do with you? You won't +never speak! It has made me quite sad many a time, you know very well! +But you can't help it! So go away, please, and be nobody, for you +never would be anybody! I did my best to get you to be somebody, but +you wouldn't! Thank you all the same! I will take you and put you +where you can be as dull as you please, and nobody will mind."--Here +she left Clare, went down, and lifted her plaything.--"Dolly, dolly," +she resumed, "he's come! I knew he would! And you don't know it +because you're nobody!" + +Without looking back, or a word of adieu to Clare, she went slowly +down the steps, one by one, with the doll in her arms, manifesting for +it neither contempt nor tenderness. Many a child would have carried +the discrowned favourite by one leg; she carried her in both hands. + +Clare waited a while on the narrow, closed-in, wooden stair, not a +little wondering, and full of thought. His wonder, however, had no +puzzlement in it. The child's behaviour involved no difficulty. The +two existences came together, and each understood the other in virtue +of its essential nature. In after years Clare could put the thing into +such words; he sought none at the time. The child was lonely. She had +done her best with her doll, but it had failed her. It was not +companionable. The moment she looked in Clare's face, she knew that he +loved her, and that she had been waiting for _him_! She was not +surprised to see him; how should it be otherwise than just so! He was +come: good bye, dolly! The child had imagination--next to conscience +the strongest ally of common sense. She knew, like St. Paul, that an +idol is nothing. As men and women grow in imagination and common +sense, more and more will sacred silly dolls be cast to the moles and +the bats. But pretty Fancy and limping Logic are powerful usurpers in +commonplace minds. + +Clare saw nothing more of her that day, neither tried to see her; but +he did his work in an atmosphere of roses. The work was not nearly so +interesting as house-work, but Clare was an honest gentleman, +therefore did it well: that it was not interesting was of no account; +it was his work! But to know that a child was in the house, not merely +a child for him to love, but a child that already loved him so that he +could be her servant indeed, changed the stupid bank almost into the +dome of the angels. + +His fellow clerks took little notice of him beyond what, in the +routine of the day, was unavoidable. He had been a page-boy: the less +they did with him the better! Were they not wronged by his +introduction into their company? The poorest creature of them believed +he would have served out the burglars better if the chance had been +his. + + + +Chapter LVIII. + +Child-talk. + + +As Clare came down the next morning but one, there was the child again +on the dark narrow stair. She had no doll. Her hands lay folded in her +lap. She sat on the same step, the very image of child-patience. As he +approached she did not move. I believe she held solemn revel of +expectation. He laid his hand on the whitey-brown hair smoothed flat +on her head with a brush dipped in water. Not much dressing was wasted +on Ann--common little name! + +She rose, turned to him, and again laid her arms about his neck. No +kiss followed: she had not been taught to kiss. + +"Where's dolly?" asked Clare. + +"Nowhere. Buried," answered the child. + +"Where did you bury her? In the garden?" + +"No. The garden wouldn't be nowhere!" + +"Where, then?" + +"Nowhere. I threw her out of the window." + +"Into the street?" + +"Yes. She did fell on a horse's back, and he jumped. I was sorry." + +"It didn't hurt him. I hope it didn't hurt dolly!" + +The moment he said it, Clare's heart reproached him: he was not +talking true! he was not talking out of his real heart to the child! +Almost with indignation she answered:-- + +"_Things_ don't be hurt! Dolly was a thing! She's _no_ thing now!" + +"Why?" + +"Because she fell under the horse, and was seen no more." + +"Is she old enough," thought Clare, "to read the Pilgrim's Progress?" + +"Will you tell me, please," he said, "_when_ a thing is only a thing?" + +"When it won't mind what you do or say to it." + +"And when is a thing no thing any more?" + +"When you never think of it again." + +"Is a fly a thing?" + +"I _could_ make a fly mind, only it would hurt it!" + +"Of course we wouldn't do that!" + +"No; we don't want to make a fly mind. It's not one of our creatures." + +Clare thought that was far enough in metaphysics for one morning. + +"I waited for you yesterday," he said, "but you didn't come!" + +"Dolly didn't like to be buried. I mean, I didn't like burying +dolly. I cried and wouldn't come." + +"Then why did you bury dolly?" + +"She _had_ to be buried. I told you she couldn't _be_ anybody! So I +_made_ her be buried." + +"I see! I quite understand.--But what have you to amuse yourself with +now?" + +"I don't want to be mused now. You's come! I'm growed up!" + +"Yes, of course!" answered Clare; but he was puzzled what to say next. + +What could he do for her? Glad would he have been to take her down to +the sea, or to the docks, or into the country somewhere, till +dinner-time, and then after dinner take her out again! But there was +his work--ugly, stupid work that had to be done, as dolly _had_ to be +buried! Alas for the child who has discarded her toys, and is suddenly +growed up! What is she to do with herself? Clare's coming had caused +the loss of Ann's former interests: he felt bound to make up to her +for that loss. But how? It was a serious question, and not being his +own master, he could not in a moment answer it. + +"I wish I could stay with you all day!" he said. "But your papa wants +me in the bank. I must go." + +Clare had not had a good sight of the child, and was at a loss to +think what must be her age. Her language, both in form and utterance, +was partly precise and _grown-up_, and partly childish; but her wisdom +was child-like--and that is the opposite both of precise and +childish. It was the wisdom that comes of unity between thought and +action. + +"Is there anything I can do for you before I go--for I must go?" said +Clare. + +"Who says _must_ to you? Nurse says _must_ to me." + +"Your papa says _must_ to me." + +"If you didn't say _yes_ when papa said _must_, what would come next?" + +"He would say, 'Go out of my house, and never come in again.'" + +"And would you do it?" + +"I must: the house is his, not mine." + +"If I didn't say _yes_ when papa said _must_, what would happen?" + +"He would try to make you say it." + +"And if I wouldn't, would he say, 'Go out of my house and never come +in again'?" + +"No; you are his little girl!" + +"Then I think he shouldn't say it to you.--What is your name?" + +"Clare." + +"Then, Clare, if my papa sends you out of his house, I will go with +you.--You wouldn't turn me out, would you, when I was a _little_ +naughty?" + +"No; neither would your papa." + +"If he turned you out, it would be all the same. Where you go, I will +go. I must, you know! Would you mind if he said 'Go away'?" + +"I should be very sorry to leave you." + +"Yes, but that's not going to be! Why do you stay with papa? Were you +in the house always--ever so long before I saw you?" + +"No; a very little while only." + +"Did you come in from the street?" + +"Yes; I came in from the street. Your papa pays me to work for him." + +"And if you wouldn't?" + +"Then I should have no money, and nothing to eat, and nowhere to sleep +at night." + +"Would that make you uncomfable?" + +"It would make me die." + +"Have you a papa?" + +"Yes, but he's far away." + +"You could go to him, couldn't you?" + +"One day I shall." + +"Why don't you go now, and take me?" + +"Because he died." + +"What's _died_?" + +"Went away out of sight, where we can't go to look for him till we go +out of sight too." + +"When will that be?" + +"I don't know." + +"Does anybody know?" + +"Nobody." + +"Then perhaps you will never go?" + +"We must go; it's only that nobody knows when." + +"I think the when that nobody knows, mayn't never come.--Is that why +you have to work?" + +"Everybody has to work one way or another." + +"I haven't to work!" + +"If you don't work when you're old enough, you'll be miserable." + +"_You're_ not old enough." + +"Oh, yes, indeed I am! I've been working a long time now." + +"Where? Not for papa?" + +"No; not for papa." + +"Why not? Why didn't you come sooner? Why didn't you come _much_ +sooner--_ever_ so much sooner? Why did you make me wait for you all +the time?" + +"Nobody ever told me you were waiting." + +"Nobody ever told me you were coming, but I knew." + +"You had to wait for me, and you knew. I had to wait for you, and I +didn't know! When we have time, I will tell you all about myself, and +how I've been waiting too." + +"Waiting for me?" + +"No." + +"Who for?" + +"For my father and mother--and somebody else, I think." + +"That's me." + +"No; I'm waiting yet. I didn't know I was coming to you till I came, +and there you were!" + +The child was silent for a moment. Then she said thoughtfully, + +"You will tell me _all_ about yourself! That _will_ be nice!--Can you +tell stories?" she added. "--Of course you can! You can do +_every_thing!" + +"Oh, no, I can't!" + +"Can't you?" + +"No; I can do _some_ things--not many. I can love you, little +one!--Now I must go, or I shall be late, and nobody ever ought to be +late." + +"Go then. I will go to my nursery and wait again." + +She went down the stair without once looking behind her. Clare +followed. On the next floor she went one way to her nursery, and he +another to the back-stairs. + +One of the causes and signs of Clare's manliness was, that he never +aimed at being a man. Many men continue childish because they are +always trying to act like men, instead of simply trying to do +right. Such never develop true manliness, Clare's manhood stole upon +him unawares. That which at once made him a man and kept him a child, +was, that he had no regard for anything but what was real, that is, +true. + +All the day the thought kept coming, what could he do for the little +girl Perhaps what stirred his feeling for her most, was a suspicion +that she was neglected. But the careless treatment of a nurse was +better for her than would have been the capricious blandishments and +neglects of a mother like Mrs. Shotover. Clare, however, knew nothing +yet about Ann's mother. He knew only, by the solemnly still ways of +the child, that she must be much left to her own resources, and was +wonderfully developed in consequence--whether healthily or not, he +could not yet tell. The practical question was--how to contrive to be +her occasional companion; how to offer to serve her. + +After much thinking, he concluded that he must wait: opportunity might +suggest mode; and he would rather find than make opportunity! + + + +Chapter LIX. + +Lovers' walks. + + +He had not long to wait. That very afternoon, going a message for the +head-clerk, he met Ann walking with a young lady--who must be Miss +Shotover. Neither sister seemed happy with the other. Ann was very +white, and so tired that she could but drag her little feet after +her. Miss Shotover, flushed with exertion, and annoyed with her part +of nursemaid, held her tight and hauled her along by the hand. She +looked good-natured, but not one of the ministering sort. Every now +and then she would give the little arm a pull, and say, though not +_very_ crossly, "Do come along!" The child did not cry, but it was +plain she suffered. It was plain also she was doing her best to get +home, and avoid rousing her sister's tug. + +Keen-sighted, Clare had recognized Ann at some distance, and as he +approached had a better opportunity than on the dark stair of seeing +what his little friend was like. He saw that her eyes were unusually +clear, and, paces away, could distinguish the blue veins on her +forehead: she looked even more delicate than he had thought her. The +lines of her mouth were straightened out with the painful effort she +had to make to keep up with her sister. Her nose continued +insignificant, waiting to learn what was expected of it. + +For Miss Shotover, there was not a good feature in her face, and even +to a casual glance it might have suggested a measure of meanness. But +a bright complexion, and the youthful charm which vanishes with youth, +are pleasant in their season. Her figure was lithe, and in general she +had a look of fun; but at the moment heat and impatience clouded her +countenance. + +Clare stopped and lifted his hat. Then first the dazed child saw him, +for she was short-sighted, and her observation was dulled by +weariness. She said not a word, uttered no sound, only drew her hand +from her sister's, and held up her arms to her friend--in dumb prayer +to be lifted above the thorns of life, and borne along without pain. +He caught her up. + +"I beg your pardon, ma'am," he said, "but the little one and I have +met before:--I live in the house, having the honour to be the youngest +of your father's clerks. If you will allow me, I will carry the +child. She looks tired!" + +Miss Shotover was glad enough to be relieved of her clog, and gave +smiling consent. + +"If you would be so kind as to carry her home," she said, "I should be +able to do a little shopping!" + +"You will not mind my taking her a little farther first, ma'am? I am +on a message for Mr. Woolrige. I will carry her all the way, and be +very careful of her." + +Miss Shotover was not one to cherish anxiety. She already knew Clare +both by report and by sight, and willingly yielded. Saying, with one +of her pleasant smiles, that she would hold him accountable for her, +she sailed away, like a sloop that had been dragging her anchor, but +had now cut her cable. Clare thought what a sweet-looking girl she +was--and in truth she was sweet-_looking_. Then, all his heart turned +to the little one in his arms. + +What a walk was that for both of them! Little Ann seemed never to have +lived before: she was actually happy! She had been long waiting for +Clare, and he was come--and such as she had expected him! It was bliss +to glide thus along the busy street without the least exertion, +looking down on the heads of the people, safe above danger and fear +amid swift-moving things and the crowding confusions of life! To be in +Clare's arms was better than being in the little house on the +elephant's back in her best picture-book! True, little one! To be in +the arms of love, be they ever so weak, is better than to ride the +grandest horse in all the stables of God--and God would have you know +it! Never mind your pale little face and your puny nose! While your +heart is ready to die for love-sake, you are blessed among women! +Only remember that to die of disappointment is not to die either of or +for love! + +And to Clare, after all those days upon days during which only a dog +would come to his arms, what a glory of life it was to have a human +child in them, the little heart of the pale face beating against his +side! He was not going to forget Abdiel. Abdiel was not a fact to be +forgotten. Abdiel was not a doll, Abdiel was not a thing that would +not come alive. Abdiel was a true heart, a live soul, and Clare would +love him for ever!--not an atom the less that now he had one out upon +whom a larger love was able to flow! All true love makes abler to +love. It is only false love, the love of those who take their own +meanest selfishness, their own pleasure in being loved, for love, that +shrinks and narrows the soul. + +To the pale-faced, listening child, Clare talked much about the +wonderful Abdiel, and about the kind good Miss Tempest who was keeping +him to live again at length with his old master; and Ann loved the dog +she had never seen, because the dog loved the Clare who was come at +last. + +When they returned, Clare rang the house-bell, and gave up his charge +to the man who opened the door. Without word or tone, gesture or look +of objection, or even of disinclination, the child submitted to be +taken from Clare's loving embrace, and carried to a nurse who was +neither glad nor sorry to see her. + +He had been so long gone that Mr. Woolrige found fault with him for +it. Clare told him he had met Miss Shotover with her sister, and the +child seemed so tired he had asked leave to carry her with him, +Mr. Woolrige was not pleased, but he said nothing; on the spot the +clerks nicknamed him _Nursie_; and Clare did his best to justify the +appellation-he never lost a chance of acting up to it, and always +answered when they summoned him by it. + +Before the week was ended, he sought an interview with Miss Shotover, +and asked her whether he might not take little Ann out for a walk +whenever the evening was fine. For at five o'clock the doors of the +bank were shut, and in half an hour after he was free. Miss Shotover +said she saw no objection, and would tell the nurse to have her ready +as often as the weather was fit; whereupon Clare left her with a +gratitude far beyond any degree of that emotion by her conceivable. +The nurse, on her part, was willing to gratify Clare, and not sorry to +be rid of the child, who was not one, indeed, to interest any ordinary +woman. + +The summer came and was peculiarly fine, and almost every evening +Clare might be seen taking his pleasure--neither like bank-clerk nor +like nurse-maid, for always he had little Ann in his arms, or was +leading her along with care and entire attention: he never let her +walk except on entreaty, and not always then. To his fellow clerks +this proof of an utter lack of dignity seemed consistent with his +origin--of which they knew nothing; they knew only his late +position. To themselves they were fine gentlemen with cigars in their +mouths, and he was a lackey to the bone! To himself Clare was the +lover of a child; and about them he did not think. Theirs was the life +of a town; Clare's was a life of the universe. + +The pair came speedily to understand and communicate like twin brother +and sister. Clare, as he carried her, always knew when Ann wanted a +change of position; Ann always knew when Clare began to grow +weary--knew before Clare himself--and would insist on walking. +Neither could remember how it came, but it grew a custom that, when +they walked hand in hand, Clare told her stories of his life and +adventures; when he carried her, he told her fairy-tales, which he +could spin like a spider: she preferred the former. + +So neither bank nor nursery was any longer dreary. + +At length came the gray, brooding winter, causing red fingers and +aches and chilblains. But it was not unfriendly to little Ann. True, +she was not permitted to go out in the evening any more, but Clare, +with the help of the cook, devoted to her his dinner-hour instead. It +was no hardship to eat from a basket in place of a table, to one who +never troubled himself as to the kind, quality, or quantity of his +food itself. He had learned, like a good soldier, to endure +hardness. I have heard him say that never did he enjoy a dinner more +than when, in those homeless days of his boyhood, he tore the flakes +off a loaf fresh from the baker's oven, and ate them as he walked +along the street. The old highlanders of Scotland were trained to +think it the part of a gentleman not to mind what he ate--sign of +scant civilization, no doubt, in the eyes of some who now occupy but +do not fill their place--as time will show, when the call is for men +to fight, not to eat. + + + +Chapter LX. + +The shoe-black. + + +The head-clerk, while he had not a word against him, as he confessed +to Mr. Shotover, yet thought Clare would never make a man of +business. When pressed to say on what he grounded the opinion, he +could only answer that the lad did not seem to have his heart in it. +But if, to be a man of business, it is not enough to do one's duty +scrupulously, but the very heart must be in it, then is there +something wrong with business. The heart fares as its treasure: who +would be content his heart should fare as not a few sorts of treasure +must? Mr. Woolrige passed no such judgment, however, upon certain +older young men in the bank, whose hearts certainly were not in the +business, but even worse posited. + +One cold, miserable day, at once damp and frosty, on which it was +quite unfit to take Ann out, Clare, having eaten a hasty dinner, and +followed it with a walk, was returning through the town in good time +for the recommencement of business, when he came upon a little boy, at +the corner of a street, blowing his fingers, and stumping up and down +the pavement to keep his blood moving while he waited for a job: his +brushes lay on the top of his blacking-box on the curbstone. Clare saw +that he was both hungry and cold--states of sensation with which he +was far too familiar to look on the signs of them with indifference. +To give him something to do, and so something to eat, he went to his +block and put his foot on it. The boy bustled up, snatched at his +brushes, and began operations. But, whether from the coldness or +incapacity of his hands, Clare soon saw that his boots would not be +polished that afternoon. + +"You don't seem quite up to your business, my boy!" he said. "What's +the matter?" + +The boy made no answer, but went on with his vain attempt. A moment +more, and Clare saw a tear fall on the boot he was at work upon. + +"This won't do!" said Clare. "Let me look at _your_ boots." + +The boy stood up, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. + +"Ah!" said Clare, "I don't wonder you can't polish my boots, when you +don't care to polish your own!" + +"Please, sir," answered the boy, "it's Jim as does it! He's down wi' +the measles, an' I ain't up to it." + +"Look here, then! I'll give you a lesson," said Clare. "Many's the +boot I've blacked. Up with your foot! I'll soon show you how the +thing's done!" + +"Please, sir," objected the boy, "there ain't enough boot left to take +a polish!" + +"We'll see about that!" returned Clare. "Put it up. I've worn worse in +my time." + +The boy obeyed. The boot was very bad, but there was enough leather to +carry some blacking, and the skin took the rest. + +Clare was working away, growing pleasantly hot with the quick, sharp +motion, while two of his fellow clerks were strolling up on the other +side of the corner, who had been having more with their lunch than was +good for them. Swinging round, they came upon a well dressed youth +brushing a ragged boy's boots. It was an odd sight, and one of them, +whose name was Marway, thought to get some fun out of the phenomenon. + +"Here!" he cried, "I want my boots brushed." + +Clare rose to his feet, saying, + +"Brush the gentleman's boots. I will finish yours after, and then you +shall finish mine." + +"Hullo, Nursie! it's you turned boot-black, is it?--Nice thing for the +office, Jack!" remarked Marway, who was the finest gentleman, and the +lowest blackguard among the clerks. + +He put his foot on the block. The boy began his task, but did no +better with his boots than he had done with Clare's. + +"Soul of an ass!" cried Marway, "are you going to keep my foot there +till it freezes to the block? Why don't you do as Nursie tells you? +_He_ knows how to brush a boot! _You_ ain't worth your salt! You ain't +fit to black a donkey's hoofs!" + +"Give me the brushes, my boy," said Clare. + +The boy rose abashed, and obeyed. After a few of Clare's light rapid +strokes, the boots looked very different. + +"Bravo, Nursie!" cried Marway. "There ain't a flunkey of you all could +do it better!" + +Clare said nothing, finished the job, and stood up. Marway, turning on +the other heel as he set his foot down, said, "Thank you, Nursie!" +and was walking off. + +"Please, Mr. Marway, give the boy his penny," said Clare. + +But Marway wanted to _take a rise out of_ Clare. + +"The fool did nothing for me!" he answered. "He made my boot worse +than it was." + +"It was I did nothing for you, Mr. Marway," rejoined Clare. "What I +did, I did for the boy." + +"Then let the boy pay you!" said Marway. + +The shoe-black went into a sudden rage, caught up one of his brushes, +and flung it at Marway as he turned. It struck him on the side of the +head. Marway swore, stalked up to Clare and knocked him down, then +strode away with a grin. + +The shoe-black sent his second brush whizzing past his ear, but he +took no notice. Clare got up, little the worse, only bruised. + +"See what comes of doing things in a passion!" he said, as the boy +came back with the brushes he had hastened to secure. "Here's your +penny! Put up your foot." + +The boy did as he was told, but kept foaming out rage at the bloke +that had refused him his penny, and knocked down his friend. It did +not occur to him that he was himself the cause of the outrage, and +that his friend had suffered for him. Clare's head ached a good deal, +but he polished the boy's boots. Then he made him try again on his +boots, when, warmed by his rage, he did a little better. Clare gave +him another penny, and went to the bank. + +Marway was not there, nor did he show himself for a day or two. Clare +said nothing about what had taken place, neither did the others. + + + +Chapter LXI. + +A walk with consequences. + + +Clare had been in the bank more than a year, and not yet had +Mr. Shotover discovered why he did not quite trust him. Had Clare +known he did not, he would have wondered that he trusted him with such +a precious thing as his little Ann. But was his child very precious to +Mr. Shotover? When a man's heart is in his business, that is, when he +is set on making money, some precious things are not so precious to +him as they might be--among the rest, the living God and the man's own +life. He would pass Clare and the child without even a nod to indicate +approval, or a smile for the small woman. He had, I presume, +sufficient regard for the inoffensive little thing to be content she +should be happy, therefore did not interfere with what his clerks +counted so little to the honour of the bank. But although, as I have +said, he still doubted Clare, true eyes in whatever head must have +perceived that the child was in charge of an angel. The countenance of +Clare with Ann in his arms, was so peaceful, so radiant of simple +satisfaction, that surely there were some in that large town who, +seeing them, thought of the angels that do alway behold the face of +the Father in heaven. + +One evening in the early summer, when they had resumed their walks +after five o'clock, they saw, in a waste place, where houses had been +going to be built for the last two years, a number of caravans drawn +up in order. + +A rush of hope filled the heart of Clare: what if it should be the +menagerie he knew so well! And, sure enough, there was Mr. Halliwell +superintending operations! But if Glum Gunn were about, he might find +it awkward with the child in his arms! Gunn might not respect even +her! Besides he ought to ask leave to take her! He would carry her +home first, and come again to see his third mother and all his old +friends, with Pummy and the lion and the rest of the creatures. + +Little Ann was eager to know what those curious houses on wheels +were. Clare told her they were like her Noah's ark, full of beasts, +only real, live beasts, not beasts made of bits of stick. She became +at once eager to see them--the more eager that her contempt of things +like life that wouldn't come alive had been growing stronger ever +since she threw her doll out of the window. Clare told her he could +not take her without first asking leave. This puzzled her: Clare was +her highest authority. + +"But if _you_ take me?" she said. + +"Your papa and mamma might not like me to take you." + +"But I'm yours!" + +"Yes, you're mine--but not so much," he added with a sigh, "as +theirs!" + +"Ain't I?" she rejoined, in a tone of protesting astonishment mingled +with grief, and began to wriggle, wanting to get down. + +Clare set her down, and would have held her, as usual, by the hand, +but she would not let him. She stood with her eyes on the ground, and +her little gray face looking like stone. It frightened Clare, and he +remained a moment silent, reviewing the situation. + +"You see, little one," he said at length, "you were theirs before I +came! You were sent to them. You are their own little girl, and we +must mind what they would like!" + +"It was only till you came!" she argued. "They don't care _very_ much +for me. Ask them, please, to sell me to you. I don't think they would +want much money for me! How many shillings do you think I am worth, +Clare? Not many, I hope!--Six?" + +"You are worth more than all the money in your papa's bank," answered +Clare, looking down at her lovingly. + +The child's face fell. + +"Am I?" she said. "I'm so sorry! I didn't know I was worth so +much!--and not yours!" she added, with a sigh that seemed to come from +the very heart of her being. "Then you're not able to buy me?" + +"No, indeed, little one!" answered Clare. "Besides, papas don't sell +their little girls!" + +"Oh, yes, they do! Gus said so to Trudie!" Clare knew that _Trudie_ +meant her sister Gertrude. + +"Who is Gus?" he asked. + +"Trudie calls him Gus. I don't know more name to him. Perhaps they +call him something else in the bank." + +"Oh! he's in the bank, is he?" returned Clare. "Then I think I know +him." + +"He said it to her one night in my nursery. Jane went down; I was in +my crib. They talked such a long time! I tried to go to sleep, but I +couldn't. I heard all what he said to her. It wasn't half so nice as +what you talk to me!" + +This was not pleasant news to Clare. Augustus Marway was, if half the +tales of him were true, no fit person for his master's daughter to be +intimate with! He had once heard Mr. Shotover speak about gambling in +such terms of disapprobation as he had never heard him use about +anything else; and it was well known in the bank that Marway was in +the company of gamblers almost every night. He was so troubled, that +at first he wished the child had not told him. For what was he to do? +Could it be right to let the thing go on? Clare felt sure Mr. Shotover +either did not know that Marway gambled, or did not know that he +talked in the nursery with his daughter. But, alas, he could do +nothing without telling, and they all said none but the lowest of cads +would carry tales! For the young men thought it the part of gentlemen +_to stick by each other_, and hide from Mr. Shotover some things he +had a right to know. But Clare saw that, whatever they might think, he +must act in the matter. Little Ann wondered that he scarcely spoke to +her all the way home. But she did not say anything, for she too was +troubled: she did not belong to Clare so much as she had thought she +did! + +Clare reflected also as he went, how much he owed Ann's sister for +letting him have the little one. She had always spoken to him kindly +too, and never seemed, like the clerks, to look down upon him because +he had been a page-boy--though, he thought, if they were to be as +often hungry as he had been, they would be glad to be page-boys +themselves! For himself, he liked to be a page-boy! He would do +anything for Miss Tempest! And he must do what he could for Miss +Shotover! It would be wicked to let her marry a man that was wicked! +He had himself seen him drunk! Would it be fair, knowing she did not +know, not to tell? Would it not be helping to hurt her? Was he to be a +coward and fear being called bad names? Was he, for the sake of the +good opinion of rascals, to take care of the rascal, and let the lady +take care of herself? There was this difficulty, however, that he +could assert nothing beyond having seen him drunk! + +He carried Ann to the nursery, and set out for the menagerie. When he +knocked at the door of the house-caravan, Mrs. Halliwell opened it, +stared hardly an instant, threw her arms round his neck, and kissed +him. + +"Come in, come in, my boy!" she said. "It makes me a happy woman to +see you again. I've been just miserable over what might have befallen +you, and me with all that money of yours! I've got it by me safe, +ready for you! I lie awake nights and fancy Gunn has got hold of you, +and made away with you; then fall asleep and am sure of it. He's been +gone several times, a looking for you, I know! I think he's afraid of +you; I know he hates you. Mind you keep out of his sight; he'll do you +a mischief if he has the chance. He's the same as ever, a man to make +life miserable." + +"I've never done him wrong," said Clare, "and I'm not going to keep +out of his way as if I were afraid of him! I mean to come and see the +animals to-morrow." + +A great deal more passed between them. They had their tea +together. Mr. Halliwell, who did not care for tea, came and went +several times, and now the night was dark. Then they spoke again of +Gunn. + +"Well, I don't think he'll venture to interfere with you," said +Mrs. Halliwell, "except he happens to be drunk.--But what's that +talking? _We_'re all quiet for the night. Listen." + +For some time Clare had been conscious of the whispered sounds of a +dialogue somewhere near, but had paid no attention. The voices were +now plainer than at first When his mother told him to listen, he did, +and thought he had heard one of them before. It was peculiar--that of +an old Jew whom he had seen several times at the bank. As the talking +went on, he began to think he knew the other voice also. It was that +of Augustus Marway. The two fancied themselves against a caravan full +of wild beasts. + +Marway was the son of the port-admiral, who, late in life, married a +silly woman. She died young, but not before she had ruined her son, +whose choice company was the least respectable of the officers who +came ashore from the king's ships. + +He had of late been playing deeper and having worse luck; and had +borrowed until no one would lend him a single sovereign more. His +father knew, in a vague way, how he was going on, and had nearly lost +hope of his reformation. Having yet large remains of a fine physical +constitution, he seldom failed to appear at the bank in the +morning--if not quite in time, yet within the margin of lateness that +escaped rebuke. Mr. Shotover was a connection by marriage, which gave +Marway the privilege of being regarded by Miss Shotover as a cousin--a +privilege with desirable possibilities contingent, making him anxious +to retain the good opinion of his employer. + +Clare heard but a portion here and there of the conversation going on +outside the wooden wall; but it was plain nevertheless that Marway was +pressing a creditor to leave him alone until he was married, when he +would pay every shilling he owed him. + +The young fellow had a persuasive tongue, and boasted he could get the +better of even a Jew. Clare heard the money-lender grant him a renewal +for three months, when, if Marway did not pay, or were not the +accepted suitor of the lady whose fortune was to redeem him, his +creditor would take his course. + +The moment he perceived they were about to part, Clare hastened from +the caravan, and went along the edge of the waste ground, so as to +meet Marway on his road back to the town: at the corner of it they +came jump together. Marway started when Clare addressed him. Seeing, +then, who claimed his attention, he drew himself up. + +"Well?" he said. + +"Mr. Marway," began Clare, "I heard a great deal of what passed +between you and old Lewin." + +Marway used worse than vulgar language at times, and he did so now, +ending with the words, + +"A spy! a sneaking spy! Would you like to lick my boot? By Jove, you +shall know the taste of it!" + +"Nobody minds being overheard who hasn't something to conceal! If I +had low secrets I would not stand up against the side of a caravan +when I wanted to talk about them. I was inside. Not to hear you I +should have had to stop my ears." + +"Why didn't you, then, you low-bred flunkey?" + +"Because I had heard of you what made it my duty to listen." + +Marway cursed his insolence, and asked what he was doing in such a +place. He would report him, he said. + +"What I was doing is my business," answered Clare. "Had I known you +for an honest man I would not have listened to yours. I should have +had no right." + +"You tell me to my face I'm a swindler!" said Marway between his +teeth, letting out a blow at Clare, which he cleverly dodged. + +"I do!" + +"I don't know what you mean, but bitterly shall you repent your +insolence, you prying rascal! This is your sweet revenge for a blow +you had not the courage to return!--to dog me and get hold of my +affairs! You cur! You're going to turn informer next, of course, and +bear false witness against your neighbour! You shall repent it, I +swear!" + +"Will it be bearing false witness to say that Miss Shotover does not +know the sort of man who wants to marry her? Does she know why he +wants to marry her? Does her father know that you are in the clutches +of a money-lender?" + +Marway caught hold of Clare and threatened to kill him. Clare did not +flinch, and he calmed down a little. + +"What do you want to square it?" he growled. + +"I don't understand you," returned Clare. + +"What's the size of your tongue-plaster?" + +"I don't know much slang." + +"What bribe will silence you then? I hope that is plain enough--even +for _your_ comprehension!" + +"If I had meant to hold my tongue, I should have held it." + +"What do you want, then?" + +"To keep you from marrying Miss Shotover." + +"By Jove! And suppose I kick you into the gutter, and tell you to mind +your own business--what then?" + +"I will tell either your father or Mr. Shotover all about it." + +"Even you can't be such a fool! What good would it do you? You're not +after her yourself, are you?--Ha! ha!--that's it! I didn't nose +that!--But come, hang it! where's the _use_?--I'll give you four +flimsies--there! Twenty pounds, you idiot! There!" + +"Mr. Marway, nothing will make me hold my tongue--not even your +promise to drop the thing." + +"Then what made you come and cheek me? Impudence?" + +"Not at all! I should have been glad enough not to have to do it! I +came to you for my own sake." + +"That of course!" + +"I came because I would do nothing underhand!" + +"What are you going to do next, then?" + +"I am going to tell Mr. Shotover, or Admiral Marway--I haven't yet +made up my mind which." + +"What are you going to tell them?" + +"That old Lewin has given you three months to get engaged to Miss +Shotover, or take the consequences of not being able to pay what you +owe him." + +"And you don't count it underhand to carry such a tale?" + +"I do not. It would have been if I hadn't told you first. I would tell +Miss Shotover, only, if she be anything of a girl, she wouldn't +believe me." + +"I should think not! Come, come, be reasonable! I always thought you a +good sort of fellow, though I _was_ rough on you, I confess. There! +take the money, and leave me my chance." + +"No. I will save the lady if I can. She shall at least know the sort +of man you are." + +"Then it's war to the knife, is it?" + +"I mean to tell the truth about you." + +"Then do your worst. You shall black my boots again." + +"If I do, I shall have the penny first." + +"You cringing flunkey!" + +"I haven't cringed to you, Mr. Marway!" + +Marway tried to kick him, failed, and strode into the dark between him +and the lamps of the town. + + + +Chapter LXII. + +The cage of the puma. + + +Marway was a fine, handsome fellow, whose manners, where he saw +reason, soon won him favour, and two of the young men in the office +were his ready slaves. Every moment of the next day Clare was +watched. Marway had laid his plans, and would forestall +frustration. Clare could hardly do anything before the dinner-hour, +but Marway would make assurance double sure. + +At anchor in the roads lay a certain frigate, whose duty it was to +sail round the islands, like a duck about her floating brood. Among +the young officers on board were two with whom Marway was intimate. He +had met them the night before, and they had together laid a plot for +nullifying Clare's interference with Marway's scheme--which his +friends also had reason to wish successful, for Marway owed them both +money. Clare had come in the way of all three. + +Now little Ann was a guardian cherub to the object of their enmity, +and he and she must first of all be separated. Clare had asked leave +of Miss Shotover to take the child to Noah's ark, as she called it, +that evening, and Marway had learned it from her: Clare's going would +favour their plan, but the child's presence would render it +impracticable. + +One thing in their favour was, that Mr. Shotover was from home. If +Clare had resolved on telling him rather than the admiral, he could +not until the next evening, and that would give them abundant time. On +the other hand, having him watched, they could easily prevent him from +finding the admiral. But Clare had indeed come to the just conclusion +that his master had the first right to know what he had to tell. His +object was not the exposure of Marway, but the protection of his +master's daughter: he would, therefore, wait Mr. Shotover's return. +He said to himself also, that Marway would thereby have a chance to +bethink himself, and, like Hamlet's uncle, "try what repentance can." + +As soon as he had put the bank in order for the night, he went to find +his little companion, and take her to Noah's ark. The child had been +sitting all the morning and afternoon in a profound stillness of +expectation; but the hour came and passed, and Clare did not appear. + +"You never, never, never came," she said to him afterward. "I had to +go to bed, and the beasts went away." + +It was many long weeks before she told him this, or her solemn little +visage smiled again. + +He went to the little room off the hall, where he almost always found +her waiting for him, dressed to go. She was not there. Nobody came. He +grew impatient, and ran in his eagerness up the front stair. At the +top he met the butler coming from the drawing-room--a respectable old +man, who had been in the family as long as his master. + +"Pardon me, Mr. Porson," said the butler, who was especially polite to +Clare, recognizing in him the ennoblement of his own order, "but it is +against the rules for any of the gentlemen below to come up this +staircase." + +"I know I'm in the wrong," answered Clare; "but I was in such a hurry +I ventured this once. I've been waiting for Miss Ann twenty minutes." + +"If you will go down, I will make inquiry, and let you know directly," +replied the butler. + +Clare went down, and had not waited more than another minute when the +butler brought the message that the child was not to go out. In vain +Clare sought an explanation; the old man knew nothing of the matter, +but confessed that Miss Shotover seemed a little put out. + +Then Clare saw that his desire to do justice had thwarted his +endeavour: Marway had seen Miss Shotover, he concluded, and had so +thoroughly prejudiced her against anything he might say, that she had +already taken the child from him! He repented that he had told him his +purpose before he was ready to follow it up with immediate +action. Distressed at the thought of little Ann's disappointment, he +set out for the show, glad in the midst of his grief, that he was +going to see Pummy once more. + +The weather had been a little cloudy all day, but as he left the +closer part of the town, the vaporous vault gave way, and the west +revealed a glorious sunset. Troubled for the trouble of little Ann, +Clare seemed drawn into the sunset. The splendour said to him: "Go on; +sorrow is but a cloud. Do the work given you to do, and the clouds +will keep moving; stop your work and the clouds will settle down +hard." + +"When I was on the tramp," thought Clare, "I always went on, and +that's how I came here. If I hadn't gone on, I should never have found +the darling!" + +As little as during any day's tramp did he know how his reflection was +going to be justified. + +He wandered on, and the minutes passed slowly: it was wandering now +with no child in his arms! He was in no haste to go to the menagerie; +he would be in good time for the beasts; and the later he was, the +sooner he would see his mother alone and have a talk with her! + +At last, it being now quite dark, he turned, and made for the +caravans. + +A crowd was going up the steps, passing Mrs. Halliwell slowly, and +descending into the area surrounded by the beasts. Clare went up, and +laid his money on the little white table. The good woman took it with +a smile, threw it in her wooden bowl, and handed him, as if it had +been his change, three bright sovereigns. Clare turned his face +away. He could not take them. He felt as if it would break one bond +between them. + +"The money's your own!" she said, in a low voice. + +"By and by, mother!" he answered. + +"No, no, take it now," she insisted, in an almost angry whisper; but +the same moment threw the sovereigns among the silver, and some +coppers that lay on the table over them. + +Judging by her look that he had better say nothing, he turned and went +down the steps. Before he reached the bottom of them, Glum Gunn +elbowed his way past him, throwing a scowl on him from his ugly eyes +at the range of a few inches. + +The place was fuller than it had been all the evening, and with a +rougher sort of company. The show would close in about an hour. It +seemed to Clare not so well lighted as usual. Perhaps that was why he +did not observe that he was watched and followed by Marway, with two +others, and one burly, middle-aged, sailor-looking fellow. But I doubt +whether he would have seen them in any light, for he had no +suspicions, and was not ready to analyze a crowd and distinguish +individuals. + +He avoided making straight for Pummy, contenting himself for the +moment with an occasional glimpse of him between the moving heads, now +opening a vista, now closing it again, for he hoped to get gradually +nearer unseen, so as to be close to the animal when first he should +descry him, for he dreaded attracting attention by becoming, while yet +at a distance, the object of an uproarious outbreak of affection on +the part of the puma. + +But while he was yet a good way from him, a most ferocious yell sprang +full grown into the air, which the very fibres of his body knew as one +of the cries of the puma when most enraged. There he was on his hind +legs, ramping against the front of the cage, every hair on him +bristling, his tail lashing his flanks. The same instant arose a +commotion in the crowd behind Clare, a pushing and stooping and +swaying to and fro, with shouts of, "Here he is! here he is!" + +Filled with a foreboding that was almost a prescience, he fell to +forcing his way without ceremony, and had got a little nearer to the +puma, when, elbowing roughly through the spectators, with red, evil +face, in drink but not drunk, Glum Gunn appeared, almost between him +and the cage--once more, to the horror of Clare, holding by the neck +his poor little Abdiel, curled up into the shape of a flea. The brute +was making his way with him to the cage of the puma, whose wrath, +grown to an indescribable frenzy, now blazed point-blank at the dog. + +I think some waft of the wild odour of the menagerie must have reached +the nostrils of the loving creature, brought back old times and his +master, and waked the hope of finding him. That he had but just +arrived was plain, for he had not had time to get to his master. + +Clare was almost at the edge of the close-packed, staring crowd, +absorbed in the sight of the huge raving cat. Breaking through its +outermost ring in the strength of sudden terror, he darted to the cage +to reach it before Glum Gunn. A man crossed and hustled him. Gunn +opened the door of the cage, and flung Abdiel to the puma. Ere he +could close it, Clare struck him once more a stout left-hander on the +side of his head. Gunn staggered back. Clare sprang into the +cage--just as Pummy spying him uttered a jubilant roar of +recognition. His jumping into the cage just prevented the puma from +getting out, and the crowd from trampling each other to death to +escape The Christians' Friend; but now that Clare was in, the +cage-door might have swung all night open unheeded--so long, that is, +as no dog appeared. + +As for Abdiel the puma had forgotten him: the dog was out of his sight +for the moment, though only behind him, while his friend and he were +rubbing recognizant noses. Abdiel showed his wisdom by keeping in the +background. The moment he was flung into the cage, he had got into a +corner of it, and stood up on his hind legs. + +His master believed that, knowing how the puma loved the human form +divine, he thought to prejudice him in his favour by showing how near +he could come to it. There he yet stood, his head sunk on his chest, +watching out of his eyes for the terrible moment when his enemy should +again catch sight of him. + +The moment came. The puma's delight had broken out in wildest +motion. He sprang to the roof of his cage, and grappling there, looked +down with retorted neck, and saw the dog. Poor Abdiel immediately +raised his head, and in hope of propitiation all but forlorn, began a +little dance his master had taught him. + +What Pummy would have done with him, I fear, but I cannot tell. Clare +sprang to the rescue, and the weight of the puma's bulk descended, not +on Abdiel, but on the shoulders of Clare who had the dog in his +bosom. In a moment more it was evidenced that a common love, however +often the cause of jealousy, is the most powerful mediator between the +generous. The puma forgot his hate, the dog forgot his fear, and +presently, to the admiration of the crowd, Clare and Pummy and Abby +were rolling over and over each other on the floor of the cage. + +Pummy had the best of the rough game. One moment he would be a bend in +a seemingly unloosable knot of confused animality, the next he would +be clinging to the top of his cage, where the others could not follow +him. Perhaps to have a human to play with, was even better than dreams +of loveliest frolics with brothers and sisters, and a mother as madly +merry as they, in still, moonlit nights among the rocks, where neither +sound nor scent of horse woke the devil in any of their bosoms! + +Glum Gunn, too angry to speak, stood watching with a scowl fit for +Lucifer when he rose from his first fall from heaven. He could do +nothing! If he touched one, all three would be upon him! Experience +had taught him what the puma would do in defence of Clare! He must +bide his time!--But he must keep hold of his chance! He drew from his +pocket his master-key, and at a moment when Clare was under the other +two, slid it into the key-hole, and locked the door of the cage. He +had him now--and his beast of a dog too! If he could have turned the +puma mad, and made him tear them both to shreds, he would not have +delayed an instant. But he must think! He must say, like Hamlet, +"About, my brains!" + +The man, however, who wishes to do evil, will find as ready helpers as +he who wishes to do well: in the place were those who wanted Gunn's +aid, and would give him theirs. + +He felt a touch on his arm, glanced sullenly round, and saw a face +under whose beauty lay the devil. Marway, with eye and thumb, +requested him to withdraw for a moment, and he did not hesitate. As he +went he chuckled to himself at the thought of Clare when he found the +door locked. + +Marway's three accomplices had drifted off one by one to wait him +outside: he rejoined them with Gunn; and, retiring a little way from +the caravans, the five held a council, the results of which make an +important part of Clare's history. + +Clare seemed absorbed in his game with his four-footed, one-tailed +friends, but he was wide awake: he had Abdiel to deliver, and kept, +therefore, all the time, at least half an eye on Glum Gunn. He saw +Marway come up to him, and saw them retire together: it was the very +moment to leave the cage with Abdiel! He rose, not without difficulty, +because of the jumping of his playmates upon him and over him, and +went to the door. + +The moment he did so, the crowd was greatly amused to see the puma +turn upon the dog with a snarl, and the dog, at the fearful sound of +altered mood, immediately put on the man, rise to one pair of feet, +and begin to dance. The puma turned from him, went to the heel of his +chosen master, and there stood. + +In vain Clare endeavoured to open the gate. He had never known it +locked, and could not think when it had been done. At length, amid the +laughter of the spectators, he desisted, and the three resumed their +frolics. + +At this the admiration of the visitors broke out. They had seen the +door made fast, and had kept pretty quiet, waiting what would come: +they had thus earned their amusement when he sought in vain to open +it. When his withdrawal confessed him foiled, the merrier began to +mock and the ruder to jeer. But when they saw him laugh, and all three +return to their gambols, they applauded heartily. + +Just before this last portion of the entertainment, Mr. Halliwell, who +had been looking on for a while, retired, not knowing the cage-door +was locked. He went to his wife and said, that, if they had but the +boy and his dog again, and were but free of that brother of his, the +menagerie would be a wild-beast paradise. He would have had her go and +see the pranks in the puma's cage, but she was too tired, she said; so +he strolled out with his pipe, and left his men to close the +exhibition. Mrs. Halliwell fastened her door and went to bed, a little +hurt that Clare did not come to her. + +Gradually the folk thinned away; and at last only a few who had got in +at half-price remained. To them the attendants hinted that they were +going to shut shop, and one by one they shuffled out, the readier that +Clare was now so tired that Pummy could not get up the merest tail of +a lark more. He was quite fresh himself, and had he been out in the +woods, would certainly not have gone home till morning. But he was +such a human creature that he would not insist when he saw Clare was +weary; and that he had no inclination to play with Abdiel when his +master was out of the game, was quite as well for Abdiel, for Pummy +might have forgot himself. When Abby, not free from fear, as knowing +well he was not free from danger, crept to his master's bosom, Pummy +gave a low growl, and shoving his nose under the long body of the dog, +with one jerk threw him a yard off upon the floor, whence Abdiel +returned to content himself with his master's feet, abandoning the +place of honour to one who knew himself stronger, and probably counted +himself better. So they all fell asleep in peace. For although Clare +knew himself and Abdiel Gunn's prisoners, he feared no surprise with +two such rousable companions. + + + +Chapter LXIII. + +The dome of the angels. + + +When Clare awoke, he knew he had been asleep a long time. It was, +notwithstanding, quite dark, and there was something wrong with +him. His head ached: it had never ached before. He put out his hands: +Pummy's hairy body was nowhere near. He called Abdiel: no whimper +answered; no cold nose was thrust into his hand. He had gone to sleep, +surely between his two friends! Could he have only dreamed it? + +Why was the darkness so thick? There must surely be light in the +clouds by this time! He felt half awake and half dreaming. + +What was the curious motion he grew aware of? Was something trying to +keep him asleep, or was something trying to wake him? Had they put him +in a big cradle? Were they heaving him about to rouse him? Or could it +be a gentle earthquake that was rocking him to and fro? Would it wake +up in earnest presently, and pull and push, and shake and rattle, +until the dome of the angels came shivering down upon him? + +Where was he? Not on the hard floor of Pummy's cage, but on something +much harder--like iron. Was he in the wagon in which they carried the +things for setting up the show? Something had happened to him, and his +mother was taking him with her! But in that case he would be lying +softer! _She_ would not have given him a bed so full of aches! + +What would they think at the bank? What would little Ann think if he +came to her no more? + +He could not be in a caravan; the motion was much too smooth and +pleasant for that! + +He put his hand to his face: what was it wet on his cheek? It did not +feel nice; it felt like blood! Had he had a blow on the head? Was that +what gave him this headache? He felt his head all over, but could find +no hurt. + +Why was he lying like a log, wondering and wondering, instead of +getting up and seeing what it all meant? It must be the darkness and +the headache that kept him down! The place was very close! He +_must_ get out of it! + +He tried to get on his feet, but as he rose, his head struck +something, and he dropped back. He got again on his knees and groped +about. On all sides he was closed in. But he was not shut in a dungeon +of stone. He seemed to be in a great wooden box--small enough to be a +box, much too large for a coffin. Could it be one of the oubliettes in +the roof of the doge's palace at Venice? He laughed at the idea, for +the motion continued, the gentle earthquake that seemed trying to rock +him to sleep: the doge's palace could hardly be afloat on the grand +canal! + +What could it all mean? What would little Ann do without him? She +would not cry: she never cried--at least, he had never seen her cry! +but that would not make it easier for her! + +What had become of Abdiel? Had Glum Gunn got him? Then the wet on his +face was Abdiel's blood--shed in his defence, perhaps, when his +enemies were taking him away! + +Fears and anxieties, such as he had never known before, began to crowd +upon him--not for himself; he was not made to think of himself, either +first or second. Something dreadful might be going on that he could +not prevent! He had never been so miserable. It was high time to do +something--to ask the great one somewhere, he did not know where, who +could somehow, he did not know how, hear the thoughts that were not +words, to do what ought to be done for little Ann, and Abdiel, and +Pummy! He prayed in his heart, lay still, and fell fast asleep. + +He came to himself again, in the act of drawing a deep breath of cool, +delicious air. He was no longer shut in the dark, stifling box. He was +coming alive! A comforting wind blew all about him. It was like a live +thing putting its own life into him. But his eyelids were heavy; he +was unable to open them. + +All at once they opened of themselves. + +The dome of the angels had come down and closed in round him, but +bringing room for him, taking none away. It was blue, and filled with +the loveliest white clouds, possessed by a blowing wind that never was +able to blow them away. They were of strangely regular shapes; not the +less were they alive--piled one above the other, up and up--up ever so +high! They all kept their places, and some had the loveliest blue +shadows upon them, which glided about a little. But the dome of the +angels rose high, and ever higher still, above them. The dome of the +angels was at home, and the clouds were at home in it. He gazed +entranced at the sight. Then came a sudden strong heave and roll of +the earthquake, and a light shone in his eyes that blinded him. + +It was but the strong friendly sun. When Clare opened his eyes again, +he knew that he was lying on the deck of one of the great ships he had +so frequently looked at from the shore. Oh, how often had he not +longed after this one and that one of them, as if in some one +somewhere, perhaps in that one, lay something he could not do without, +which yet he could never set his eyes, not to say his hands upon. He +had his heart's desire, and what was to come of it? He lay on the +ship, and the ship lay on the sea, a little world afloat on the water, +moving as a planet moves through the heavens, but carrying her own +heaven with her, attended by her own clouds, bearing her whither she +would. Up into those clouds he lay gazing, up into the dome of the +angels, drawing deeper and deeper breaths of gladness, too happy to +think--when a foot came with a kick in the ribs, and a voice ordered +him to get up: was he going to lie there till the frigate was paid +off? + + + +Chapter LXIV. + +The panther. + + +Clare scrambled to his feet, and surveyed the man who had thus roused +him. He had a vague sense of having seen him before, but could not +remember where. Feeling faint, and finding himself beside a gun, he +leaned upon it. + +The sailor regarded him with an insolent look. + +"Wake up," he said, "an' come along to the cap'n. What's the service a +comin' to, I should like to know, when a beggarly shaver like you has +the cheek to stow hisself away on board one o' his majesty's frigates! +Wouldn' nothin' less suit your highness than a berth on the Panther?" + +"Is that the name of the ship?" asked Clare. + +"Yes, that's the name of the ship!" returned the man, mimicking +him. "You'll have the Panther, his mark, on the back o' _you_ +presently! Come along, I say, to the cap'n! We ha' got to ask _him_, +what's to be done wi' rascals as rob their masters, an' then stow +theirselves away on board his majesty's ships!" + +"Take me to the captain," said Clare. + +The man seemed for a moment to doubt whether there might not be some +mistake: he had expected to see him cringe. But he took him by the +collar behind, and pushed him along to the quarter-deck, where an +elderly officer was pacing up and down alone. + +"Well, Tom," said the captain, stopping in his walk, "what's the +matter? Who's that you've got?" + +"Please yer honour," answered the boatswain, giving Clare a shove, +"this here's a stowaway in his majesty's ship, Panther. I found him +snug in the cable-tier.--Salute the captain, you beggar!" + +Clare had no cap to lift, but he bowed like the gentleman he was. The +captain stood looking at him. Clare returned his gaze, and smiled. A +sort of tremble, much like that in the level air on a hot summer day, +went over the captain's face, and he looked harder at Clare. + +A sound arose like the purring of an enormous cat, and, sure enough, +it was nothing else: chained to the foot of the forward binnacle stood +a panther, a dark yellow creature with black spots, bigger than Pummy, +swinging his tail. Clare turned at the noise he made. The panther made +a bound and a leap to the height and length of his chain, and uttered +a cry like a musical yawn. Clare stretched out his arms, and staggered +toward him. The next moment the animal had him. The captain darted to +the rescue. But the beast was only licking him wherever there was a +bare spot to lick; and Clare wondered to find how many such spots +there were: he was in rags! The panther kept tossing him over and over +as if he were a baby, licking as he tossed, and in his vibrating body +and his whole behaviour manifested an exceeding joy. The captain stood +staring "like one that hath been stunned." + +The boatswain was not astonished: he had seen Clare at home among wild +animals, and thought the panther was taken with the wild-beast smell +about him. + +"I beg your pardon, sir," said Clare, rolling himself out of the +panther's reach, and rising to his feet, "but wild things like me, +somehow! I slept with a puma last night. He and this panther, sir, +would have a terrible fight if they met!" + +The captain threw a look of disappointment at the panther. + +"Go forward, Tom," he said. + +The man did not like the turn things had taken, and as he went wore +something of the look of one doomed to make the acquaintance of +another kind of cat. + +"What made you come on board this ship, my lad?" asked the captain, in +a voice so quiet that it sounded almost kind. + +"I did not come on board, sir." + +"Don't trifle with _me_," returned the captain sternly. + +Clare looked straight at him, and said-- + +"I have done nothing wrong, sir. I know you will help me. I fell +asleep last night, as I told you, sir, in the cage of a puma. I knew +him, of course! How I came awake on board your ship, I know no more +than you do, sir." + +The smile of Clare's childhood had scarcely altered, and it now shone +full on the captain. He turned away, and made a tack or two on the +quarter-deck. He was a tall, thin man, with a graceful carriage, and a +little stoop in the shoulders. He had a handsome, sad face, growing +old. His hair was more than half way to gray, and he seemed somewhere +about fifty. He had the sternness of a man used to command, but under +the sternness Clare saw the sadness. + +The attention of the boy was now somewhat divided between the captain +and his panther, which seemed possessed with a fierce desire to get at +him, though plainly with no inimical intent. The attention of the +captain seemed divided between the boy and the panther; his eyes now +rested for a moment on the animal, now turned again to the boy. Two +officers on the port side of the quarter-deck stole glances at the +strange group--the stately, solemn, still man; the ragged creature +before him, who looked in his face without fear or anxiety, and with +just as little presumption; and the wildly excited panther, whose +fierce bounding alternated with cringing abasement of his beautiful +person, accompanied by loving sweeps of his most expressive tail. + +The captain made a tack or two more on the quarter-deck, then turned +sharp on the boy. + +"What is your name?" he asked. + +"I don't quite know, sir," answered Clare. + +"Come with me," said the captain. + +To the surprise of the officers, he led the way to his state-room, and +the boy followed. The panther gave a howl as Clare disappeared. The +officers remarked that the captain looked strange. His lips were +compressed as if with vengeance, but the muscles of his face were +twitching. + + + +Chapter LXV. + +At home. + + +Clare followed, wondering, but nowise anxious. He saw nothing to make +him anxious. The captain looked a good man, and a good man was a +friend to Clare! But when he entered the state-room, and saw himself +from head to foot in a mirror let into a bulkhead, he was both +startled and ashamed: how could the captain take such a scarecrow into +his room! he thought. He did not reflect that it was just the sort of +thing he did himself. He had indeed felt dirty and disreputable, and +been aware of the dry, rasping tongue of the panther on many patches +of bare skin, but he had had no idea what a wretched creature he +looked. Not one of the garments he saw in the mirror was his own, and +they were disgracefully torn. His hair was sticking out every way, and +his face smeared with blood. His feet were bare, and one trouser-leg +rent to the knee. His enemies had done their best to ensure prejudice, +and frustrate belief. They did not see in his look what no honest man +could misread. Innocent as he knew himself, he could not help feeling +for a moment disconcerted. But his faithfulness threw him on the mercy +of the man before him. + +The captain turned and sat down. The boy stood in the doorway, staring +at his reflex self in the mirror. The captain understood his +consternation. + +"Come along, my poor boy," he said. "How did you get into this mess?" + +"I think I know," answered Clare, "but I'm not sure." + +"You must have been drunk," sighed the captain. + +"Oh, no, sir!" returned Clare, with one of his radiant smiles. "I've +had but one glass of beer in my life, and I didn't like it." + +The captain smiled too, and gazed at him for several moments without +speaking. + +"It seems to me," he said at last, but as if he were thinking of +something quite different, "you must be in want of food." + +"Oh, no, sir!" answered Clare again, "I'm used to going without." + +Like a child the sport of an evil fairy, he was again the boy of the +old wanderings, in the old, hungry times. But did he ever look so lost +as in the mirror before him? he wondered. + +"You haven't told me----" said the captain, and stopped short, as if +he dreaded going further. + +"I will tell you anything you want to know, sir. Please ask me." + +"You say you did not come on board the frigate: what am I to +understand by that?" + +"That I was brought, sir, in my sleep. It wouldn't be fair, would it, +sir, to mention names, when I don't know for certain who they were +that brought me? I never knew anything till I opened my eyes, and +thought I was in----" + +He paused. + +"_Where_ did you think you were?" asked the captain eagerly. + +"In the dome of the angels, sir," answered Clare. + +The captain's face fell. He thought him an innocent, on whom rascals +had been playing a practical joke. But that made no difference! If he +were a simpleton, he might none the less be----! Was _her_ boy left +to----? + +He shuddered visibly, and again was silent. + +"Tell me," he said at length, "what you remember." + +He meant--of the circumstances that immediately preceded his coming to +himself on board the Panther; but Clare began with the first thing his +memory presented him with. Perhaps he was yet a little dazed. He had +not got through a single sentence, when he saw that something earlier +wanted telling first; and the same thing happening again and again +within the first five minutes of his narration, sir Harry saw he had +before him a boy either of fertile imagination, or of "strange, +eventful history." But either supposition had its difficulty. If, on +the one hand, he had had the tenth part of the experiences hinted at; +if, for one thing, he had been but a single month on the tramp, how +had he kept such an innocent face, such an angelic smile? If, on the +other hand, he was making up these tales, why did he not look sharper? +and whence the angelic smile? Did the seeming innocence indicate only +such a lack of intellect as occasionally accompanies a remarkable +individual gift? He must make him begin at the beginning, and tell +everything he knew, or might pretend to know about himself! + +"Stop," he said. "You told me you did not quite know your name: what +did they call you as far back as you can remember?" + +"Clare Porson," answered the boy. + +At the first word the captain gave a little cry, but repressed his +emotion, and went on. His face was very white, and his breath came and +went quickly. + +"Why did you say you did not _quite_ know your name?" + +"My father and mother called me by their name because there was nobody +to tell them what my real name was." + +"Then they weren't your own father and mother that gave you the name?" + +"No, sir. I'm but using theirs till I get my own. I shall one day." + +"Why do you think so?" + +"Don't _you_ think, sir, that everything will come right one day?" + +"God grant it!" responded the captain with a groan, self-reproached +for the little faith beside the strong desire. + +"Do you think it wrong, sir, to use a name that is not quite my own?" +said Clare. "People sometimes seem to think so." + +"Not at all, my boy! You must have a name. You did not steal it. They +gave it you." + +The look of the boy when he thus answered him, completely restored sir +Harry's confidence in his mental soundness, while both the mode and +the nature of his answer to every question he put to him, bore the +strongest impress of truth. + +"If the boy be a liar," he said to himself, "I will never more trust +my kind. I will turn to the wild-beasts, and believe in panthers and +hyenas!" + +"They did, sir," answered Clare. "Mr. Porson gave me his own name, and +he was a clergyman. So I thought afterwards, when I had to think about +it, that it couldn't be wrong to use it." + +But how could sir Harry palter so with himself? He might have got at +the necessary facts so much quicker! + +Sir Harry shrank from seeing his suddenly wakened hope, dead for many +a year, crumble before his eyes. He dared not yet drive question +close. + +"Did Mr. Porson give you both your names?" he asked. + +"No, sir. My mother said I brought the first with me. She said I told +them--I don't remember myself--that my name was Clare." + +The captain drove back the words that threatened to break from his +lips in spite of him. His boy's name was Clarence, but his mother, +whose dearest friend was a _Clara_, called her child always _Clare_! + +"I mean my second mother, sir," explained Clare; "my own mother is in +the dome of the angels." + +A flash lightened from the captain's eyes, but he seemed to himself to +have gone blind. Clare saw the flash, and wondered. + +Again _the dome of the angels_! The words burst into meaning. Out of +the depths of the world of life rose to his mind's eye the terrible +thing that had made him a lonely man. Again he stood with his head +thrown back, looking up at the Assumption of the Virgin painted in +that awful dome; again the earthquake seized the church, and shook the +painted heaven down upon them. He knew no more. His little boy had +been standing near him, holding his mother's hand, but staring up like +his father! + +He had to force the next words from his throat. + +"Where did the good people who gave you their name find you?" + +"Sitting on my mother--my own mother. The angels fell down on her, and +when they went up again, she had got mixed with them, and went up +too." + +Some people thought my friend Skymer "a little queer, you know!" I +leave my reader to his own thought: he will judge after his +kind. Clare's father no longer doubted his perfect faculty. + +All through Clare's life, as often as the old, vague, but ever ready +vision brought back its old feelings, with them came the old thoughts, +the old forms of them, and the old words their attendant shadows; and +then Clare talked like a child. + +The stern, sorrowful man hid his face In his hands. + +"Grace," he murmured--and Clare knew somehow that he spoke to his +wife, "we have him again! We will never distrust him more!" + +His frame heaved with the choking of his sobs. + +Then Clare understood that the grand man was his father. The awe of a +perfect gladness fell upon him. He knelt before him, and laid his +hands together as in prayer. + +"Why did you distrust me, father?" said the half-naked outcast. + +"It was not my child, it was my father I distrusted. I am ashamed," +said sir Harry, and clasped him in his arms. + +The boy laid his blood-stained face against his father's bosom, and +his soul was in a better home than a sky full of angels, a home better +than the dome itself of all the angels, for his home was his father's +heart. + +How long they remained thus I cannot tell. It seemed to both as if so +it had been from eternity, and so to eternity it would be. When a +thing is as it should be, then we know it is from eternity to +eternity. The true is. + +The father relaxed at length the arms that strained his child to his +heart. Clare looked up with white, luminous face. He gazed at his +father, cried like little Ann, "You're come!" and slid to his feet. He +clasped and kissed and clung to them--would hardly let them go. + +All this time the officers on the quarter-deck were wondering what the +captain could have to do with the beggarly stowaway. The panther stood +on his feet, anxiously waiting, his ears starting at every sound. He +was longing for the boy with whom he had played, panther cub with +human infant, in the years long gone by. The sweet airs of his +childhood were to the panther plainly recognizable through all the +accretions that disfigured but could not defile him. The two were the +same age. They had rolled on floor and deck together when neither +could hurt--and now neither would. For the animal was perfectly +harmless, and chained only because apt to be unseasonably +frolicsome. When they let him loose, it was a season of high jinks and +rare skylarking. Then the men had to look out! He had twice knocked a +man overboard, and had once tumbled overboard himself. But he had +never killed a creature, was always gentle with children, and might be +trusted to look after any infant. + +Sir Harry raised his son, kissed him, set him on his own chair, and +retired into an inner cabin. + +A knock came to the door. Clare said, "Come in." The quartermaster +entered. Instead of sir Harry, he saw the miserable stowaway, seated +in the captain's own chair. He swore at him, and ordered him out, +prepared to give him a kick as he passed. + +"Out with you!" he cried. "Go for'ard. Tell the bo's'n to look out a +rope's end. I'll be after you." + +"The captain told me to sit here," answered Clare, and sat. + +The officer looked closer at him, begged his pardon, saluted, and +withdrew. + +The father heard, and said to himself, "The boy is a gentleman: he +knows where to take his orders." + +He called him into the inner cabin, and there washed him from head to +foot, rejoicing to find under his rags a skin as clean as his own. + +"Now what are we to do for clothes, Clare?" said sir Harry. + +"Perhaps somebody would lend me some," answered Clare. "Mayn't I be +your cabin-boy, father? You will let me be a sailor, won't you, and +sail always with you?" + +"You shall be a sailor, my boy," answered sir Harry, "and sail with me +as long as God pleases. You know to obey orders!" + +"I will obey the cook if you tell me, father." + +"You shall obey nobody but myself," returned sir Harry; "--and the +lord high admiral," he added, with a glance upward, and a smile like +his son's. + +For that day Clare kept to the captain's state-room; the next, he went +on deck in a midshipman's uniform, which he wore like a gentleman that +could obey orders. + + + +Chapter LXVI. + +The end of Clare Skymer's boyhood. + + +His father had a hammock slung for him in the state-room; he could not +be parted from him even when they slept. + +One night sir Harry, lying awake, heard a movement in the state-room, +and got up. It was a still, star-lit night. The frigate was dreaming +away northward with all sail set. Through the windows shone the level +stars. From a beam above hung a dim lamp. He could see no one. He went +to the hammock. There was no boy in it. Then he spied him, kneeling +under the stern-windows, with his head down. + +"Anything the matter, Clare?" he asked. + +"No, father." + +"What are you doing?" + +"Trying to say _Thank you for my father!_" + +"Oh, thank him, thank him, my boy!" returned sir Harry. "Thank him +with all your heart. He will give us _her_ some day!" + +"Yes, father, he will!" responded Clare. + +His father knelt beside him, but neither said word that the other +heard. + +The next night, Clare was on the quarter-deck with his father, and +heard him give certain orders to the officers of the watch. He had +never heard orders given in such a way: he spoke so quietly, so +directly, so simply! The night was gusty and dark, threatening foul +weather. The captain measured the quarter-deck as when first Clare saw +him, but with a mien how different! He walked as slow and stately as +before, but with a look almost of triumph in his eyes, glancing often +at the clouds. The thought of having such a father made Clare tremble +with delight from head to foot. His father was the power of the +sea-planet that bore them! Him the great vessel, and all aboard of +her, obeyed! He was the life of her motions, the soul of her! At his +pleasure she bowed her obedient head, and swept over the seas! Clare's +heart swelled within him. + +But this father had, the night before, knelt with him in the presence +of one unseen, worshipping and thanking a higher than himself! As the +captain of the Panther sailed his frigate through the seas, so the +great father, the father of his father, the father of all fathers, to +whom the captain kneeled as a little child, sailed through the heaven +of heavens the huge ship of the world, guided fleet upon fleet +innumerable through trackless space! And over an infinitely grander +sea than the measureless ocean of worlds, the Father was carrying +navies of human souls, every soul a world whose affairs none but the +Father could understand, through many a storm, and waterspout, and +battle with the powers of evil, safe to the haven of the children, the +Father's house! And Clare began to understand that so it was. + +One day his father said to him-- + +"Clare, whatever you forget, whatever you remember, mind this--that +you and I and your mother are the children of one father, and that we +have all three to be good children to that father. If we do as he +tells us, he will bring us all at length to the same port. Our admiral +is Jesus Christ. We take our orders from him. But each has to sail his +own ship." + +The boatswain shook in his wide shoes, but Clare never showed him the +least disfavour. He recognized at once the two officers he had seen at +the menagerie, but beyond giving each a look he could hardly mistake, +he showed no sign of having any knowledge of them. + +He set himself to be a sailor, and learned fast. I need scarcely say +he was as precise in obeying any superior officer as the best sailor +on board. In a few weeks he felt and looked to the manner born--as +indeed he was, for not only his father, but his grandfather, and his +great-grandfather, and more yet of his ancestors,--how many I do not +know, were sailors. + +He had had a rough shaking. The earthquake had come and gone, and come +again and gone a many times. But the shaking earth was his nurse, and +she taught him to dwell in a world that cannot be shaken. + +[Illustration: Clare, Tommy, and the baby in custody.] + +[Illustration: Mrs. Porson finds Clare by the side of his dead mother.] + +[Illustration: Clare is heard talking to Maly.] + +[Illustration: Clare makes friends during Mr. Porson's absence.] + +[Illustration: The blacksmith gives Clare and Tommy a rough greeting.] + +[Illustration: Clare and Abdiel at the locked pump.] + +[Illustration: Clare proceeds to untie the ropes from the ring in the +bull's nose.] + +[Illustration: Clare finds the advantage of a powerful friend.] + +[Illustration: The gardener's discomfiture.] + +[Illustration: Clare asks Miss Shotover to let him carry Ann home.] + +[Illustration: Clare is found giving the shoeblack a lesson.] + +[Illustration: Clare asleep in the puma's cage.] + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Rough Shaking, by George MacDonald + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A ROUGH SHAKING *** + +***** This file should be named 8886-8.txt or 8886-8.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/8/8/8/8886/ + +Produced by Distributed Proofreaders + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: A Rough Shaking + +Author: George MacDonald + + +Release Date: September, 2005 [EBook #8886] +This file was first posted on August 20, 2003 +Last Updated: March 9, 2018 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: UTF-8 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A ROUGH SHAKING *** + + + + +Text file produced by Distributed Proofreaders + +HTML file produced by David Widger + + + +</pre> + + <div style="height: 8em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h1> + A ROUGH SHAKING + </h1> + <h2> + By George MacDonald + </h2> + <p> + <br /> <br /> + </p> + <h5> + Dedicated to my great-nephew, Norman MacKay Binney, aged<br /> seven, + because his Godfather and Godmother love him dearly. <br /> <br /> + Hampstead, August 26, 1890. + </h5> + <p> + <br /> <br /> + </p> + <hr /> + <p> + <br /> <br /> + </p> + <p> + <b>CONTENTS</b> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0001"> <b>A ROUGH SHAKING.</b> </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0001"> Chapter I. How I Came to know Clare Skymer. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0002"> Chapter II. With his parents. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0003"> Chapter III. Without his parents. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0004"> Chapter IV. The new family. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0005"> Chapter V. His new home. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0006"> Chapter VI. What did draw out his first smile. + </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0007"> Chapter VII. Clare and his brothers. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0008"> Chapter VIII. Clare and his human brothers </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0009"> Chapter IX. Clare the defender. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0010"> Chapter X. The black aunt. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0011"> Chapter XI. Clare on the farm. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0012"> Chapter XII. Clare becomes a guardian of the + poor. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0013"> Chapter XIII. Clare the vagabond. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0014"> Chapter XIV. Their first helper </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0015"> Chapter XV. Their first host. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0016"> Chapter XVI. On the tramp. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0017"> Chapter XVII. The baker's cart. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0018"> Chapter XVIII. Beating the town. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0019"> Chapter XIX. The blacksmith and his forge. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0020"> Chapter XX. Tommy reconnoitres. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0021"> Chapter XXI. Tommy is found and found out. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0022"> Chapter XXII. The smith in a rage. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0023"> Chapter XXIII. Treasure trove. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0024"> Chapter XXIV. Justifiable burglary. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0025"> Chapter XXV. A new quest. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0026"> Chapter XXVI. A new entrance. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0027"> Chapter XXVII. The baby has her breakfast. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0028"> Chapter XXVIII. Treachery. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0029"> Chapter XXIX. The baker. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0030"> Chapter XXX. The draper. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0031"> Chapter XXXI. An addition to the family. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0032"> Chapter XXXII. Shop and baby. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0033"> Chapter XXXIII. A bad penny. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0034"> Chapter XXXIV. How things went for a time. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0035"> Chapter XXXV. Clare disregards the interests of + his employers. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0036"> Chapter XXXVI. The policeman. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0037"> Chapter XXXVII. The magistrate. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0038"> Chapter XXXVIII. The workhouse. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0039"> Chapter XXXIX. Away. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0040"> Chapter XL. Maly. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0041"> Chapter XLI. The caravans. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0042"> Chapter XLII. Nimrod. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0043"> Chapter XLIII. Across country. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0044"> Chapter XLIV. A third mother. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0045"> Chapter XLV. The menagerie. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0046"> Chapter XLVI. The angel of the wild beasts. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0047"> Chapter XLVII. Glum Gunn. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0048"> Chapter XLVIII. The puma. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0049"> Chapter XLIX. Glum Gunn's revenge. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0050"> Chapter L. Clare seeks help. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0051"> Chapter LI. Clare a true master. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0052"> Chapter LII. Miss Tempest. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0053"> Chapter LIII. The gardener. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0054"> Chapter LIV. The Kitchen. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0055"> Chapter LV. The wheel rests for a time. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0056"> Chapter LVI. Strategy. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0057"> Chapter LVII. Ann Shotover. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0058"> Chapter LVIII. Child-talk. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0059"> Chapter LIX. Lovers' walks. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0060"> Chapter LX. The shoe-black. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0061"> Chapter LXI. A walk with consequences. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0062"> Chapter LXII. The cage of the puma. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0063"> Chapter LXIII. The dome of the angels. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0064"> Chapter LXIV. The panther. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0065"> Chapter LXV. At home. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0066"> Chapter LXVI. The end of Clare Skymer's boyhood. + </a> + </p> + <p> + <br /> <br /> + </p> + <hr /> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0001" id="link2H_4_0001"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h1> + A ROUGH SHAKING. + </h1> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0001" id="link2HCH0001"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter I. How I Came to know Clare Skymer. + </h2> + <p> + It was a day when everything around seemed almost perfect: everything + does, now and then, come nearly right for a moment or two, preparatory to + coming all right for good at the last. It was the third week in June. The + great furnace was glowing and shining in full force, driving the ship of + our life at her best speed through the ocean of space. For on deck, and + between decks, and aloft, there is so much more going on at one time than + at another, that I may well say she was then going at her best speed, for + there is quality as well as rate in motion. The trees were all well + clothed, most of them in their very best. Their garments were soaking up + the light and the heat, and the wind was going about among them, telling + now one and now another, that all was well, and getting through an immense + amount of comfort-work in a single minute. It said a word or two to myself + as often as it passed me, and made me happier than any boy I know just at + present, for I was an old man, and ought to be more easily made happy than + any mere beginner. + </p> + <p> + I was walking through the thin edge of a little wood of big trees, with a + slope of green on my left stretching away into the sunny distance, and the + shadows of the trees on my right lying below my feet. The earth and the + grass and the trees and the air were together weaving a harmony, and the + birds were leading the big orchestra—which was indeed on the largest + scale. For the instruments were so different, that some of them only were + meant for sound; the part of others was in odour, of others yet in shine, + and of still others in motion; while the birds turned it all as nearly + into words as they could. Presently, to complete the score, I heard the + tones of a man's voice, both strong and sweet. It was talking to some one + in a way I could not understand. I do not mean I could not understand the + words: I was too far off even to hear them; but I could not understand how + the voice came to be so modulated. It was deep, soft, and musical, with + something like coaxing in it, and something of tenderness, and the intent + of it puzzled me. For I could not conjecture from it the age, or sex, or + relation, or kind of the person to whom the words were spoken. You can + tell by the voice when a man is talking to himself; it ought to be evident + when he is talking to a woman; and you can, surely, tell when he is + talking to a child; you could tell if he were speaking to him who made + him; and you would be pretty certain if he was holding communication with + his dog: it made me feel strange that I could not tell the kind of ear + open to the gentle manly voice saying things which the very sound of them + made me long to hear. I confess to hurrying my pace a little, but I trust + with no improper curiosity, to see—I cannot say the interlocutors, + for I had heard, and still heard, only one voice. + </p> + <p> + About a minute's walk brought me to the corner of the wood where it + stopped abruptly, giving way to a field of beautiful grass; and then I saw + something it does not need to be old to be delighted withal: the boy that + would not have taken pleasure in it, I should count half-way to the + gallows. Up to the edge of the wood came, I say, a large field—acres + on acres of the sweetest grass; and dividing it from both wood and path + stood a fence of three bars, which at the moment separated two as genuine + lovers as ever wall of “stones with lime and hair knit up” could have + sundered. On one side of the fence stood a man whose face I could not see, + and on the other one of the loveliest horses I had ever set eyes upon. I + am no better than a middling fair horseman, but, for this horse's sake, I + may be allowed to mention that my friends will all have me look at any + horse they think of buying. He was over sixteen hands, with well rounded + barrel, clean limbs, small head, and broad muzzle; hollows above his eyes + of hazy blue, and delicacy of feature, revealed him quite an old horse. + His ears pointed forward and downward, as if they wanted on their own + account to get a hold of the man the nose was so busily caressing. + Neither, I presume, had heard my approach; for all true-love-endearments + are shy, and the man had his arm round the horse's neck, and was caressing + his face, talking to him much as Philip Sidney's lady, whose lips “seemed + at once to kiss and speak,” murmured to her pet sparrow, only here the + voice was a musical baritone. That there was something between them more + than an ordinary person would be likely to understand appeared patent. + </p> + <p> + Whether or not I made an involuntary sound I cannot tell: I was so taken + with the sight, bearing to me an aspect of something eternal, that I do + not know how I carried myself; but the horse gave a little start, half + lifted his head, saw me, threw it up, uttered a shrill neigh of warning, + stepped hack a pace, and stood motionless, waiting apparently for an order + from his master—if indeed I ought not rather to call them friends + than master and servant. + </p> + <p> + The man looked round, saw me, turned toward me, and showing no sign that + my appearance was unexpected, lifted his hat with a courtesy most + Englishmen would reserve for a lady, and advanced a step, almost as if to + welcome a guest. I may have owed something of this reception to the fact + that he saw before him a man advanced in years, for my beard is very gray, + and that by no means prematurely. I saw before me one nearly, if not quite + as old as myself. His hair and beard, both rather long, were quite white. + His face was wonderfully handsome, with the stillness of a summer sea upon + it. Its features were very marked and regular and fine, for the habit of + the man was rather spare. What with his white hair and beard, and a + certain radiance in his pale complexion, which, I learned afterward, no + sun had ever more than browned a little, he reminded me for a moment as he + turned, of Cato on the shore of Dante's purgatorial island. + </p> + <p> + “I fear,” I said, “I have intruded!” There was no path where I had come + along. + </p> + <p> + The man laughed—and his laugh was more friendly than an invitation + to dinner. + </p> + <p> + “The land is mine,” he answered; “no one can say you intrude.” + </p> + <p> + “Thank you heartily. I live not very far off, and know the country pretty + well, but have got into a part of which I am ignorant.” + </p> + <p> + “You are welcome to go where you will on my property,” he answered. “I + could not close a field without some sense of having thrown a fellow-being + into a dungeon. Whatever be the rights of land, space can belong to the + individual only '<i>as it were</i>,' to use a Shakspere-phrase. All the + best things have to be shared. The house plainly was designed for a + family.” + </p> + <p> + While he spoke I scarce heeded his words for looking at the man, so much + he interested me. His face was of the palest health, with a faint light + from within. He looked about sixty years of age. His forehead was square, + and his head rather small, but beautifully modelled; his eyes were of a + light hazel, friendly as those of a celestial dog. Though slender in + build, he looked strong, and every movement denoted activity. + </p> + <p> + I was not ready with an answer to what he said. He turned from me, and as + if to introduce a companion and so render the interview easier, he called, + in tone as gentle as if he spoke to a child, but with that peculiar + intonation that had let me understand it was not to a child he was + speaking, “Memnon! come;” and turned again to me. His movement and words + directed my attention again to the horse, who had stood motionless. At + once, but without sign of haste, the animal walked up to the rails, rose + gently on his hind legs, came over without touching, walked up to his + master, and laid his head on his shoulder. + </p> + <p> + I bethought me now who the man was. He had been but a year or two in the + neighbourhood, though the property on which we now stood had been his own + for a good many years. Some said he had bought it; others knew he had + inherited it. All agreed he was a very peculiar person, with ways so oddly + unreasonable that it was evident he had, in his wanderings over the face + of the earth, gradually lost hold of what sense he might at one time have + possessed, and was in consequence a good deal cracked. There seemed + nothing, however, in his behaviour or appearance to suggest such a + conclusion: a man could hardly be counted beside himself because he was on + terms of friendship with his horse. It took me but a moment to recall his + name—Skymer—one odd enough to assist the memory. I caught it + ere he had done mingling fresh caresses with those of his long-tailed + friend. When I came to know him better, I knew that he had thus given me + opportunity—such as he would to a horse—of thinking whether I + should like to know him better: Mr. Skymer's way was not to offer himself, + but to give easy opportunity to any who might wish to know him. I learned + afterward that he knew my name and suspected my person: being rather + prejudiced in my favour because of the kind of thing I wrote, he was now + waiting to see whether approximation would follow. + </p> + <p> + “Pardon my rude lingering,” I said; “that lovely animal is enough to make + one desire nearer acquaintance with his owner. I don't think I ever saw + such a perfect creature!” + </p> + <p> + I remembered the next moment that I had heard said of Mr. Skymer that he + liked beasts better than men, but I soon found this was only one of the + foolish things constantly said of honest men by those who do not + understand them. + </p> + <p> + There are women even who love dogs and dislike children; but, nauseous + fact as this is, it is not so nauseous as the fact that there are men who + believe in no animal rights, or in any God of the animals, and think we + may do what we please with them, indulging at their cost an insane thirst + after knowledge. Injustice may discover facts, but never truth. + </p> + <p> + “I grant him nearly a perfect creature,” he answered, “But he is far more + nearly perfect than you yet know him! Excuse me for speaking so + confidently; but if we were half as far on for men, as Memnon is for a + horse, the kingdom of heaven would be a good deal nearer!” + </p> + <p> + “He seems an old horse!” + </p> + <p> + “He is an old horse—much older than you can think after seeing him + come over that paling as he did. He is forty.” + </p> + <p> + “Is it possible!” + </p> + <p> + “I know and can prove his age as certainly as my own. He is the son of an + Arab mare and an English thoroughbred.—Come here, Memnon!” + </p> + <p> + The horse, who had been standing behind like a servant in waiting, put his + beautiful head over his master's shoulder. + </p> + <p> + “Memnon,” said Mr. Skymer, “go home and tell Mrs. Waterhouse I hope to + bring a gentleman with me to lunch.” + </p> + <p> + The horse walked gently past us, then started at a quick trot, which + almost immediately became a gallop. + </p> + <p> + “The dear fellow,” said his master, “would not gallop like that if he were + on the hard road; he knows I would not like it.” + </p> + <p> + “But, excuse me, how can the animal convey your message?—how + communicate what he knows, if he does understand what you say to him?” + </p> + <p> + “He will at least take care that the housekeeper look in his mane for the + knot which perhaps you did not observe me tie in it.” + </p> + <p> + “You have a code of signals by knots then?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes—comprising about half a dozen possibilities.—I hope you + do not object to the message I sent! You will do me the honour of lunching + with me?” + </p> + <p> + “You are most kind,” I answered—with a little hesitation, I suppose, + fearing to bore my new acquaintance. + </p> + <p> + “Don't make me false to horse and housekeeper, Mr. Gowrie,” he resumed.—“I + put the horse first, because I could more easily explain the thing to Mrs. + Waterhouse than to Memnon.” + </p> + <p> + “Could you explain it to Memnon?” + </p> + <p> + “I should have a try!” he answered, with a peculiar smile. + </p> + <p> + “You hold yourself bound then to keep faith with your horse?” + </p> + <p> + “Bound just as with a man—that is, as far as the horse can + understand me. A word understood is binding, whether spoken to horse, or + man, or pig. It makes it the more important that we can do so little, must + work so slowly, for the education of the lower animals. It seems to me an + absolute horror that a man should lie to an inferior creature. Just think—if + an angel were to lie to us! What a shock to find we had been reposing + faith in a devil.” + </p> + <p> + “Excuse me—I thought you said <i>an angel</i>!” + </p> + <p> + “When he lied, would he not be a devil?—But let us follow Memnon, + and as we walk I will tell you more about him.” + </p> + <p> + He turned to the wood. + </p> + <p> + “The horse,” I said, pointing, “went that way!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” answered his master; “he knew it was nearer for him to take the + long way round. If I had started him and one of the dogs together, the + horse would have gone that way, and the dog taken the path we are now + following.” + </p> + <p> + We walked a score or two of yards in silence. + </p> + <p> + “You promised to tell me more about your wonderful horse!” I said. + </p> + <p> + “With pleasure. I delight in talking about my poor brothers and sisters! + Most of them are only savages yet, but there would be far fewer such if we + did not treat them as slaves instead of friends. One day, however, all + will be well for them as for us—thank God.” + </p> + <p> + “I hope so,” I responded heartily. “But please tell me,” I said, + “something more about your Memnon.” + </p> + <p> + Mr. Skymer thought for a moment. + </p> + <p> + “Perhaps, after all,” he rejoined, “his best accomplishment is that he can + fetch and carry like a dog. I will tell you one of his feats that way. But + first you must know that, having travelled a good deal, and in some wild + countries, I have picked up things it is well to know, even if not the + best of their kind. A man may fail by not knowing the second best! I was + once out on Memnon, five and twenty miles from home, when I came to a + cottage where I found a woman lying ill. I saw what was wanted. The + country was strange to me, and I could not have found a doctor. I wrote a + little pencil-note, fastened it to the saddle, and told the horse to go + home and bring me what the housekeeper gave him—and not to spare + himself. He went off at a steady trot of ten or twelve miles an hour. I + went into the cottage, and, awaiting his return, did what I could for the + woman. I confess I felt anxious!” + </p> + <p> + “You well might,” I said: “why should you say <i>confess</i>?” + </p> + <p> + “Because I had no business to be anxious.” + </p> + <p> + “It was your business to do all for her you could.” + </p> + <p> + “I was doing that! If I hadn't been, I should have had good cause to be + anxious! But I knew that another was looking after her; and to be anxious + was to meddle with his part!” + </p> + <p> + “I see now,” I answered, and said nothing more for some time. + </p> + <p> + “What a lather poor Memnon came back in! You should have seen him! He had + been gone nearly five hours, and neither time nor distance accounted for + the state he was in. I did not let him do anything for a week. I should + have had to sit up with him that night, if I had not been sitting up at + any rate. The poor fellow had been caught, and had made his escape. His + bridle was broken, and there were several long skin wounds in his belly, + as if he had scraped the top of a wall set with bits of glass. How far he + had galloped, there was no telling.” + </p> + <p> + “Not in vain, I hope! The poor woman?” + </p> + <p> + “She recovered. The medicine was all right in a pocket under the flap of + the saddle. Before morning she was much better, and lived many years + after. Memnon and I did not lose sight of her.—But you should have + seen the huge creature lying on the floor of that cabin like a worn-out + dog, abandoned and content! I rubbed him down carefully, as well as I + could, and tied my poncho round him, before I let him go to sleep. Then as + soon as my patient seemed quieted for the night, I made up a big fire of + her peats, and they slept like two babies, only they both snored.—The + woman beat,” he added with a merry laugh. “It was the first, almost the + only time I ever heard a horse snore.—As we walked home next day he + kept steadily behind me. In general we walked side by side. Either he felt + too tired to talk to me, or he was not satisfied with himself because of + something that had happened the day before. Perhaps he had been careless, + and so allowed himself to be taken. I do not think it likely.” + </p> + <p> + “What a loss it will be to you when he dies!” I said. + </p> + <p> + He looked grave for an instant, then replied cheerfully— + </p> + <p> + “Of course I shall miss the dear fellow—but not more than he will + miss me; and it will be good for us both.” + </p> + <p> + “Then,” said I,—a little startled, I confess, “you really think—” + and there I stopped. + </p> + <p> + “Do <i>you</i> think, Mr. Gowrie,” he rejoined, answering my unpropounded + question, “that a God like Jesus Christ, would invent such a delight for + his children as the society and love of animals, and then let death part + them for ever? I don't.” + </p> + <p> + “I am heartily willing to be your disciple in the matter,” I replied. + </p> + <p> + “I know well,” he resumed, “the vulgar laugh that serves the poor public + for sufficient answer to anything, and the common-place retort: 'You can't + give a shadow of proof for your theory!'—to which I answer, 'I never + was the fool to imagine I could; but as surely as you go to bed at night + expecting to rise again in the morning, so surely do I expect to see my + dear old Memnon again when I wake from what so many Christians call the + sleep that knows no waking.'—Think, Mr. Gowrie, just think of all + the children in heaven—what a superabounding joy the creatures would + be to them!—There is one class, however,” he went on, “which I + should like to see wait a while before they got their creatures back;—I + mean those foolish women who, for their own pleasure, so spoil their dogs + that they make other people hate them, doing their best to keep them from + rising in the scale of God's creation.” + </p> + <p> + “They don't know better!” I said. For every time he stopped, I wanted to + hear what he would say next. + </p> + <p> + “True,” he answered; “but how much do they want to know the right way of + anything? They have good and lovely instincts—like their dogs, but + do they care that there is a right way and a wrong way of following them?” + </p> + <p> + We walked in silence, and were now coming near the other side of the small + wood. + </p> + <p> + “I hope I shall not interfere with your plans for the day!” I said. + </p> + <p> + “I seldom have any plans for the day,” he answered. “Or if I have, they + are made to break easily. In general I wait. The hour brings its plans + with it—comes itself to tell me what is wanted of me. It has done so + now. And see, there is Memnon again in attendance on us!” + </p> + <p> + There, sure enough, was the horse, on the other side of the paling that + here fenced the wood from a well-kept country-road. His long neck was + stretched over it toward his master. + </p> + <p> + “Memnon,” said Mr. Skymer as we issued by the gate, “I want you to carry + this gentleman home.” + </p> + <p> + I had often enough in my youth ridden without a saddle, but seldom indeed + without some sort of bridle, however inadequate: I did not, at the first + thought of the thing, relish mounting without one a horse of which all I + knew was that he and his master were on better terms than I had ever seen + man and horse upon before. But even while the thought was passing through + my head, Memnon was lying at my feet, flat as his equine rotundity would + permit. Ashamed of my doubt, I lost not a moment in placing myself in the + position suggested by Sir John Falstaff to Prince Hal for the defence of + his own bulky carcase—astride the body of the animal, namely. At + once he rose and lifted me into the natural relation of man and horse. + Then he looked round at his master, and they set off at a leisurely pace. + </p> + <p> + “You have me captive!” I said. + </p> + <p> + “Memnon and I,” answered Mr. Skymer, “will do what we can to make your + captivity pleasant.” + </p> + <p> + A silence followed my thanks. In this procession of horse and foot, we + went about half a mile ere anything more was said worth setting down. Then + began evidence that we were drawing nigh to a house: the grassy lane + between hedges in which we had been moving, was gradually changing its + character. First came trees in the hedge-rows. Then the hedges gave way to + trees—a grand avenue of splendid elms and beeches alternated. The + ground under our feet was the loveliest sward, and between us and the sun + came the sweetest shadow. A glad heave but instant subsidence of the live + power under me, let me know Memnon's delight at feeling the soft elastic + turf under his feet: he had said to himself, “Now we shall have a gallop!” + but immediately checked the thought with the reflection that he was no + longer a colt ignorant of manners. + </p> + <p> + “What a lovely road the turf makes!” I said. “It is a lower sky—solidified + for feet that are not yet angelic.” + </p> + <p> + My host looked up with a brighter smile than he had shown before. + </p> + <p> + “It is the only kind of road I really like,” he said, “—though turf + has its disadvantages! I have as much of it about the place as it will + bear. Such roads won't do for carriages!” + </p> + <p> + “You ride a good deal, I suppose?” + </p> + <p> + “I do. I was at one time so accustomed to horseback that, without + thinking, I was not aware whether I was on my horse's feet or my own.” + </p> + <p> + “Where, may I ask, does my friend who is now doing me the favour to carry + 'this weight and size,' come from?” + </p> + <p> + “He was born in England, but his mother was a Syrian—of one of the + oldest breeds there known. He was born into my arms, and for a week never + touched the ground. Next month, as I think I mentioned, he will be forty + years old!” + </p> + <p> + “It is a great age for a horse!” I said. + </p> + <p> + “The more the shame as well as the pity!” he answered. + </p> + <p> + “Then you think horses might live longer?” + </p> + <p> + “Much longer than they are allowed to live in this country,” he answered. + “And a part of our punishment is that we do not know them. We treat them + so selfishly that they do not live long enough to become our friends. At + present there are but few men worthy of their friendship. What else is a + man's admiration, when it is without love or respect or justice, but a + bitter form of despite! It is small wonder there should be so many stupid + horses, when they receive so little education, have such bad associates, + and die so much too young to have gained any ripe experience to transmit + to their posterity. Where would humanity be now, if we all went before + five-and-twenty?” + </p> + <p> + “I think you must be right. I have myself in my possession at this moment, + given me by one who loved her, an ink-stand made from the hoof of a pony + that died at the age of at least forty-two, and did her part of the work + of a pair till within a year or two of her death.—Poor little + Zephyr!” + </p> + <p> + “Why, Mr. Gowrie, you talk of her as if she were a Christian!” exclaimed + Mr. Skymer. + </p> + <p> + “That's how you talked of Memnon a moment ago! Where is the difference? + Not in the size, though Memnon would make three of Zephyr!” + </p> + <p> + “I didn't say <i>poor Memnon</i>, did I? You said <i>poor Zephyr</i>! That + is the way Christians talk about their friends gone home to the grand old + family mansion! Why they do, they would hardly like one to tell them!” + </p> + <p> + “It is true,” I responded. “I understand you now! I don't think I ever + heard a widow speak of her departed husband without putting <i>poor</i>, + or <i>poor dear</i>, before his name.—By the way, when you hear a + woman speak of her <i>late</i> husband, can you help thinking her ready to + marry again?” + </p> + <p> + “It does sound as if she had done with him! But here we are at the gate!—Call, + Memnon.” + </p> + <p> + The horse gave a clear whinny, gentle, but loud enough to be heard at some + distance. It was a tall gate of wrought iron, but Memnon's summons was + answered by one who could clear it—though not open it any more than + he: a little bird, which I was not ornithologist enough to recognize—mainly + because of my short-sightedness, I hope—came fluttering from the + long avenue within, perched on the top of the gate, looked down at our + party for a moment as if debating the prudent, dropped suddenly on + Memnon's left ear, and thence to his master's shoulder, where he sat till + the gate was opened. The little one went half-way up the inner avenue with + us, making several flights and returns before he left us. + </p> + <p> + The boy that opened the gate, a chubby little fellow of seven, looked up + in Mr. Skymer's face as if he had been his father and king in one, and + stood gazing after him as long as he was in sight. I noticed also—who + could have failed to notice?—that every now and then a bird would + drop from the tree we were passing under, and alight for a minute on my + host's head. Once when he happened to uncover it, seven or eight perched + together upon it. One tiny bird got caught in his beard by the claws. + </p> + <p> + “You cannot surely have tamed <i>all</i> the birds in your grounds!” I + said. + </p> + <p> + “If I have,” he answered, “it has been by permitting them to be + themselves.” + </p> + <p> + “You mean it is the nature of birds to be friendly with man?” + </p> + <p> + “I do. Through long ages men have been their enemies, and so have + alienated them—they too not being themselves.” + </p> + <p> + “You mean that unfriendliness is not natural to men?” + </p> + <p> + “It cannot be human to be cruel!” + </p> + <p> + “How is it, then, that so many boys are careless what suffering they + inflict?” + </p> + <p> + “Because they have in them the blood of men who loved cruelty, and never + repented of it.” + </p> + <p> + “But how do you account for those men loving cruelty—for their being + what you say is contrary to their nature?” + </p> + <p> + “Ah, if I could account for that, I should be at the secret of most + things! All I meant to half-explain was, how it came that so many who have + no wish to inflict suffering, yet are careless of inflicting it.” + </p> + <p> + I saw that we must know each other better before he would quite open his + mind to me. I saw that though, hospitable of heart, he threw his best + rooms open to all, there were others in his house into which he did not + invite every acquaintance. + </p> + <p> + The avenue led to a wide gravelled space before a plain, low, long + building in whitish stone, with pillared portico. In the middle of the + space was a fountain, and close to it a few chairs. Mr. Skymer begged me + to be seated. Memnon walked up to the fountain, and lay down, that I might + get off his back as easily as I had got on it. Once down, he turned on his + side, and lay still. + </p> + <p> + “The air is so mild,” said my host, “I fancy you will prefer this to the + house.” + </p> + <p> + “Mild!” I rejoined; “I should call it hot!” + </p> + <p> + “I have been so much in real heat!” he returned. “Notwithstanding my love + of turf, I keep this much in gravel for the sake of the desert.” + </p> + <p> + I took the seat he offered me, wondering whether Memnon was comfortable + where he lay; and, absorbed in the horse, did not see my host go to the + other side of the basin. Suddenly we were “clothed upon” with a house + which, though it came indeed from the earth, might well have come direct + from heaven: a great uprush of water spread above us a tent-like dome, + through which the sun came with a cool, broken, almost frosty glitter. We + seemed in the heart of a huge soap-bubble. I exclaimed with delight. + </p> + <p> + “I thought you would enjoy my sun-shade!” said Mr. Skymer. “Memnon and I + often come here of a hot morning, when nobody wants us. Don't we, Memnon?” + </p> + <p> + The horse lifted his nose a little, and made a low soft noise, a chord of + mingled obedience and delight—a moan of pleasure mixed with a + half-born whinny. + </p> + <p> + We had not been seated many moments, and had scarcely pushed off the shore + of silence into a new sea of talk, when we were interrupted by the + invasion of half a dozen dogs. They were of all sorts down to no sort. Mr. + Skymer called one of them Tadpole—I suppose because he had the + hugest tail, while his legs were not visible without being looked for. + </p> + <p> + “That animal,” said his master, “—he looks like a dog, but who would + be positive what he was!—is the cleverest in the pack. He seems to + me a rare individuality. His ancestors must have been of all sorts, and he + has gathered from them every good quality possessed by each. Think what a + man might be—made up that way!” + </p> + <p> + “Why is there no such man?” I said. + </p> + <p> + “There may be some such men. There must be many one day,” he answered, “—but + not for a while yet. Men must first be made willing to be noble.” + </p> + <p> + “And you don't think men willing to be made noble?” + </p> + <p> + “Oh yes! willing enough, some of them, to be <i>made</i> noble!” + </p> + <p> + “I do not understand. I thought you said they were not!” + </p> + <p> + “They are willing enough <i>to be made</i> noble; but that is very + different from being willing <i>to be</i> noble: that takes trouble. How + can any one become noble who desires it so little as not to fight for it!” + </p> + <p> + The man drew me more and more. He had a way of talking about things seldom + mentioned except in dull fashion in the pulpit, as if he cared about them. + He spoke as of familiar things, but made you feel he was looking out of a + high window. There are many who never speak of real things except in a + false tone; this man spoke of such without an atom of assumed solemnity—in + his ordinary voice: they came into his mind as to their home—not as + dreams of the night, but as facts of the day. + </p> + <p> + I sat for a while, gazing up through the thin veil of water at the blue + sky so far beyond. I thought how like that veil was to our little life + here, overdomed by that boundless foreshortening of space. The lines in + Shelley's <i>Adonais</i> came to me: + </p> +<pre xml:space="preserve"> + “Life, like a dome of many-coloured glass, + Stains the white radiance of Eternity, + Until Death tramples it to fragments.” + </pre> + <p> + Then I thought of what my host had said concerning the too short lives of + horses, and wondered what he would say about those of dogs. + </p> + <p> + “Dogs are more intelligent than horses,” I said: “why do they live a yet + shorter time?” + </p> + <p> + “I doubt if you would say so in an Arab's tent,” he returned. “If you had + said, 'still more affectionate,' I should have known better how to answer + you.” + </p> + <p> + “Then I do say so,” I replied. + </p> + <p> + “And I return, that is just why they live no longer. They do not find the + world good enough for them, die, and leave it.” + </p> + <p> + “They have a much happier life than horses!” + </p> + <p> + “Many dogs than some horses, I grant.” + </p> + <p> + That instant arose what I fancied must be an unusual sound in the place: + two of the dogs were fighting. The master got up. I thought with myself, + “Now we shall see his notions of discipline!” nor had I long to wait. In + his hand was a small riding-whip, which I afterward found he always + carried in avoidance of having to inflict a heavier punishment from + inability to inflict a lighter; for he held that in all wrong-doing man + can deal with, the kindest thing is not only to punish, but, with animals + especially, to punish at once. He ran to the conflicting parties. They + separated the moment they heard the sound of his coming. One came cringing + and crawling to his feet; the other—it was the nondescript Tadpole—stood + a little way off, wagging his tail, and cocking his head up in his + master's face. He gave the one at his feet several pretty severe cuts with + the whip, and sent him off. The other drew nearer. His master turned away + and took no notice of him. + </p> + <p> + “May I ask,” I said, when he returned to his seat, “why you did not punish + both the animals for their breach of the peace?” + </p> + <p> + “They did not both deserve it.” + </p> + <p> + “How could you tell that? You were not looking when the quarrel began!” + </p> + <p> + “Ah, but you see I know the dogs! One of them—I saw at a glance how + it was—had found a bone, and dog-rule about finding is, that what + you find is yours. The other, notwithstanding, wanted a share. It was + Tadpole who found the bone, and he—partly from his sense of justice—cannot + endure to have his claims infringed upon. Every dog of them knows that + Tadpole must be in the right.” + </p> + <p> + “He looked as if he expected you to approve of his conduct!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, that is the worst of Tadpole! he is so self-righteous as to imagine + he deserves praise for standing on his rights! He is but a dog, you see, + and knows no better!” + </p> + <p> + “I noticed you disregarded his appeal.” + </p> + <p> + “I was not going to praise him for nothing!” + </p> + <p> + “You expect them to understand your treatment?” + </p> + <p> + “No one can tell how infinitesimally small the beginnings of + understanding, as of life, may be. The only way to make animals reasonable—more + reasonable, I mean—is to treat them as reasonable. Until you can go + down into the abysses of creation, you cannot know when a nature begins to + see a difference in quality of action.” + </p> + <p> + “I confess,” I said, “Mr. Tadpole did seem a little ashamed as he went + away.” + </p> + <p> + “And you see Blanco White at my feet, taking care not to touch them. He is + giving time, he thinks, for my anger to pass.” + </p> + <p> + He laughed the merriest laugh. The dog looked up eagerly, but dropped his + head again. + </p> + <p> + If I go on like this, however, I shall have to take another book to tell + the story for which I began the present! In short, I was drawn to the man + as never to another since the friend of my youth went where I shall go to + seek and find him one day—or, more likely, one solemn night. I was + greatly his inferior, but love is a quick divider of shares: he that + gathers much has nothing over, and he that gathers little has no lack. I + soon ceased to think of him as my <i>new</i> friend, for I seemed to have + known him before I was born. + </p> + <p> + I am going to tell the early part of his history. If only I could tell it + as it deserves to be told! The most interesting story may be so narrated + as that only the eyes of a Shakspere could spy the shine underneath its + dull surface. + </p> + <p> + He never told me any great portion of the tale of his life continuously. + One thing would suggest another—generally with no connection in + time. I have pieced the parts together myself. He did indeed set out more + than once or twice to give me his history, but always we got discussing + something, and so it was interrupted. + </p> + <p> + I will not write what I have set in order as if he were himself narrating: + the most modest man in the world would that way be put at a disadvantage. + The constant recurrence of the capital <i>I</i>, is apt to rouse in the + mind of the reader, especially if he be himself egotistic, more or less of + irritation at the egotism of the narrator—while in reality the + freedom of a man's personal utterance <i>may</i> be owing to his lack of + the egotistic. Partly for my friend's sake, therefore, I shall tell the + story as—what indeed it is—a narrative of my own concerning + him. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0002" id="link2HCH0002"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter II. With his parents. + </h2> + <p> + The lingering, long-drawn-out <i>table d'hôte</i> dinner was just over in + one of the inns on the <i>cornice</i> road. The gentlemen had gone into + the garden, and some of the ladies to the <i>salotto</i>, where open + windows admitted the odours of many a flower and blossoming tree, for it + was toward the end of spring in that region. One had sat down to a + tinkling piano, and was striking a few chords, more to her own pleasure + than that of the company. Two or three were looking out into the garden, + where the diaphanous veil of twilight had so speedily thickened to the + crape of night, its darkness filled with thousands of small isolated + splendours—fire-flies, those “golden boats” never seen “on a sunny + sea,” but haunting the eves of the young summer, pulsing, pulsing through + the dusky air with seeming aimlessness, like sweet thoughts that have no + faith to bind them in one. A tall, graceful woman stood in one of the + windows alone. She had never been in Italy before, had never before seen + fire-flies, and was absorbed in the beauty of their motion as much as in + that of their golden flashes. Each roving star had a tide in its light + that rose and ebbed as it moved, so that it seemed to push itself on by + its own radiance, ever waxing and waning. In wide, complicated dance, they + wove a huge, warpless tapestry with the weft of an ever vanishing aureate + shine. The lady, an Englishwoman evidently, gave a little sigh and looked + round, regretting, apparently, that her husband was not by her side to + look on the loveliness that woke a faint-hued fairy-tale in her heart. The + same moment he entered the room and came to her. He was a man above the + middle height, and from the slenderness of his figure, looked taller than + he was. He had a vivacity of motion, a readiness to turn on his heel, a + free swing of the shoulders, and an erect carriage of the head, which all + marked him a man of action: one that speculated on his calling would + immediately have had his sense of fitness satisfied when he heard that he + was the commander of an English gun-boat, which he was now on his way to + Genoa to join. He was young—within the twenties, though looking two + or three and thirty, his face was so browned by sun and wind. His features + were regular and attractive, his eyes so dark that the liveliness of their + movement seemed hardly in accord with the weight of their colour. His wife + was very fair, with large eyes of the deepest blue of eyes. She looked + delicate, and was very lovely. They had been married about five years. A + friend had brought them in his yacht as far as Nice, and they were now + going on by land. From Genoa the lady must find her way home without her + husband. + </p> + <p> + The lights in the room having been extinguished that the few present might + better see the fire-flies, he put his arm round her waist. + </p> + <p> + “I'm so glad you're come, Henry!” she said, favoured by the piano. “I was + uncomfortable at having the lovely sight all to myself!” + </p> + <p> + “It is lovely, darling!” he rejoined; then, after a moment's pause, added, + “I hope you will be able to sleep without the sea to rock you!” + </p> + <p> + “No fear of that!” she answered. “The stillness will be delightful. I was + thoroughly reconciled to the motion of the yacht,” she went on, “but there + is a satisfaction in feeling the solid earth under you, and knowing it + will keep steady all night.” + </p> + <p> + “I am glad you like the change. I never sleep the first night on shore.—I + cannot tell what it is, but somehow I keep wishing Fyvie could have taken + us all the way.” + </p> + <p> + “Never mind, love. I will keep awake with you.” + </p> + <p> + “It's not that! How could I mind lying awake with you beside me! Oh Grace, + you don't know, you cannot know, what you are to me! I don't feel in the + least that you're my other half, as people say. You're not like a part of + myself at all; to think so would be sacrilege! You are quite another, else + how could you be mine! You make me forget myself altogether. When I look + at you, I stand before an enchanted mirror that cannot show what is in + front of it.” + </p> + <p> + “No, Harry; I'm a true mirror, for I hold that inside me which remains + outside me.” + </p> + <p> + “I fear you've got beyond me!” said her husband, laughing. “You always + do!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, at nonsense, Harry.” + </p> + <p> + “Then your speech was nonsense, was it?” + </p> + <p> + “No; it was full of sense. But think of something you would like me to + say; I must fetch the boy to see the fire-flies; when I come back I will + say it.” + </p> + <p> + She left the room. Her husband stood where he was, gazing out, with a + tender look in his face that deepened to sadness—whether from the + haunting thought of his wife's delicate health and his having to leave + her, or from some strange foreboding, I cannot tell. When presently she + returned with their one child in her arms, he made haste to take him from + her. + </p> + <p> + “My darling,” he said, “he is much too heavy for you! How stupid of me not + to think of it! If you don't promise me never to do that at home, I will + take him to sea with me!” + </p> + <p> + The child, a fair, bright boy, the sleep in whose eyes had turned to + wonder, for they seemed to see everything, and be quite satisfied with + nothing, went readily to his father, but looked back at his mother. The + only sign he gave that he was delighted with the fire-flies was, that he + looked now to the one, now to the other of his parents, speechless, with + shining eyes. He knew they were feeling just like himself. Silent + communion was enough. + </p> + <p> + The father turned to carry him back to bed. The mother turned to look + after them. As she did so, her eyes fell upon two or three delicate, + small-leaved plants—I do not know what they were—that stood in + pots on the balcony in front of the open window: they were shivering. The + night was perfectly still, but their leaves trembled as with an ague-fit. + </p> + <p> + “Look, Harry! What is that?” she cried, pointing to them. + </p> + <p> + He turned and looked, said it must be some loaded wagon passing, and went + off with the child. + </p> + <p> + “I hope to-morrow will be just like to-day!” said his wife when he + returned. “What shall we do with it?—our one real holiday, you + know!” + </p> + <p> + “I have a notion in my head,” he answered. “That little town Georgina + spoke of, is not far from here—among the hills: shall we go and see + it?” + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0003" id="link2HCH0003"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter III. Without his parents. + </h2> + <p> + The sun in England seems to shine because he cannot help it; the sun in + Italy seems to shine because he means it, and wants to mean it. Thus he + shone the next morning, including in his attentions a curious little + couple, husband and wife, who, attended by a guide, and borne by animals + which might be mules and might be donkeys, and were not lovely to look on + except through sympathy with their ugliness, were slowly ascending a steep + terraced and zigzagged road, with olive trees above and below them. They + were on the south side of the hill, and the olives gave them none of the + little shadow they have in their power, for the trees next the sun were + always below the road. The man often wiped his red, innocent face, and + looked not a little distressed; but the lady, although as stout as he, did + not seem to suffer, perhaps because she was sheltered by a very large + bonnet After a silence of a good many minutes, she was the first to speak. + </p> + <p> + “I can't say but I'm disappointed in the olives, Thomas,” she remarked. + “They ain't much to keep the sun off you!” + </p> + <p> + “They wouldn't look bad along a brookside in Essex!” returned her husband. + “Here they do seem a bit out of place!” + </p> + <p> + “Well, but, poor things! how are they to help it—with only a trayful + of earth under their feet! If you planted a priest on a terrace he would + soon be as thin as they!” + </p> + <p> + They had just passed a very stout priest, in a low broad hat, and cassock, + and she laughed merrily at her small joke. They were an English country + parson and his wife, abroad for the first time in their now middle-aged + lives, and happy as children just out of school. Incapable of disliking + anybody, there was no unkindness in Mrs. Porson's laughter. + </p> + <p> + “I don't see,” she resumed, “how they ever can have a picnic in such a + country!” + </p> + <p> + “Why not?” + </p> + <p> + “There's no place to sit down!” + </p> + <p> + “Here's a whole hill-side!” + </p> + <p> + “But so hard!” she answered. “There's not an inch of turf or grass in any + direction!” + </p> + <p> + The pair—equally plump, and equally good-natured—laughed + together. + </p> + <p> + I need not give more of their talk. It was better than most talk, yet not + worth recording. Their guide, perceiving that they knew no more of Italian + than he did of English, had withdrawn to the rear, and stumped along + behind them all the way, holding much converse with his donkeys however, + admonishing now this one, now that one, and seeming not a little hurt with + their behaviour, to judge from the expostulations that accompanied his + occasionally more potent arguments. Assuredly the speed they made was + small; but it was a festa, and hot. + </p> + <p> + They were on the way to a small town some distance from the shore, on the + crest of the hill they were now ascending. It would, from the number of + its inhabitants, have been in England a village, but there are no villages + in the Riviera. However insignificant a place may be, it is none the less + a town, possibly a walled town. Somebody had told Mr. and Mrs. Person they + ought to visit Graffiacane, and to Graffiacane they were therefore bound: + why they ought to visit it, and what was to be seen there, they took the + readiest way to know. + </p> + <p> + The place was indeed a curious one, high among the hills, and on the top + of its own hill, with approaches to it like the trenches of a siege. All + the old towns in that region seem to have climbed up to look over the + heads of other things. Graffiacane saw over hills and valleys and many + another town—each with its church standing highest, the guardian of + the flock of houses beneath it; saw over many a water-course, mostly dry, + with lovely oleanders growing in the middle of it; saw over multitudinous + oliveyards and vineyards; saw over mills with great wheels, and little + ribbons of water to drive them—running sometimes along the tops of + walls to get at their work; saw over rugged pines, and ugly, verdureless, + raw hillsides—away to the sea, lying in the heat like a heavenly vat + in which all the tails of all the peacocks God was making, lay steeped in + their proper dye. Numerous were the sharp turns the donkeys made in their + ascent; and at this corner and that, the sweetest life-giving wind would + leap out upon the travellers, as if it had been lying there in wait to + surprise them with the heavenliest the old earth, young for all her years, + could give them. But they were getting too tired to enjoy anything, and + were both indeed not far from asleep on the backs of their humble beasts, + when a sudden, more determined yet more cheerful assault of their guide + upon his donkeys, roused both them and their riders; and looking sleepily + up, with his loud <i>heeoop</i> ringing in their ears, and a sense of the + insidious approach of two headaches, they saw before them the little town, + its houses gathered close for protection, like a brood of chickens, and + the white steeple of the church rising above them, like the neck of the + love-valiant hen. + </p> + <p> + Passing through the narrow arch of the low-browed gateway, hot as was the + hour, a sudden cold struck to their bones. For not a ray of light shone + into the narrow street. The houses were lofty as those of a city, and + parted so little by the width of the street that friends on opposite sides + might almost from their windows have shaken hands. Narrow, rough, steep + old stone-stairs ran up between and inside the houses, all the doors of + which were open to the air—here, however, none of the sweetest. + Everywhere was shadow; everywhere one or another evil odour; everywhere a + look of abject and dirty poverty—to an English eye, that is. + Everywhere were pretty children, young, slatternly mothers, withered-up + grandmothers, the gleam of glowing reds and yellows, and the coolness of + subdued greens and fine blues. Such at least was the composite first + impression made on Mr. and Mrs. Porson. As it was a festa, more men than + usual were looking out of cavern-like doorways or over hand-wrought iron + balconies, were leaning their backs against door-posts, and smoking as if + too lazy to stop. Many of the women were at prayers in the church. All was + orderly, and quieter than usual for a festa. None could have told the + reason; the townsfolk were hardly aware that an undefinable oppression was + upon them—an oppression that lay also upon their visitors, and the + donkeys that had toiled with them up the hills and slow-climbing valleys. + </p> + <p> + It added to the gloom and consequent humidity of the town that the sides + of the streets were connected, at the height of two or perhaps three + stories, by thin arches—mere jets of stone from the one house to the + other, with but in rare instance the smallest superstructure to keep down + the key of the arch. Whatever the intention of them, they might seem to + serve it, for the time they had straddled there undisturbed had sufficed + for moss and even grass to grow upon those which Mr. Porson now regarded + with curious speculation. A bit of an architect, and foiled, he summoned + at last what Italian he could, supplemented it with Latin and a + terminational <i>o</i> or <i>a</i> tacked to any French or English word + that offered help, and succeeded, as he believed, in gathering from a + by-stander, that the arches were there because of the earthquakes. + </p> + <p> + He had not language enough of any sort to pursue the matter, else he would + have asked his informant how the arch they were looking at could be of any + service, seeing it had no weight on the top, and but a slight endlong + pressure must burst it up. Turning away to tell his wife what he had + learned, he was checked by a low rumbling, like distant thunder, which he + took for the firing of festa guns, having discovered that Italians were + fond of all kinds of noises. The next instant they felt the ground under + their feet move up and down and from side to side with confused motion. A + sudden great cry arose. One moment and down every stair, out of every + door, like animals from their holes, came men, women, and children, with a + rush. The earthquake was upon them. + </p> + <p> + But in such narrow streets, the danger could hardly be less than inside + the houses, some of which, the older especially, were ill constructed—mostly + with boulder-stones that had neither angles nor edges, hence little grasp + on each other beyond what the friction of their weight, and the adhesion + of their poor old friable cement, gave them; for the Italians, with a + genius for building, are careless of certain constructive essentials. + After about twenty seconds of shaking, the lonely pair began to hear, + through the noise of the cries of the people, some such houses as these + rumbling to the earth. + </p> + <p> + They were far more bewildered than frightened. They were both of good + nerve, and did not know the degree of danger they were in, while the + strangeness of the thing contributed to an excitement that helped their + courage. I cannot say how they might have behaved in an hotel full of + their countrymen and countrywomen, running and shrieking, and altogether + comporting themselves as if they knew there was no God. The fear on all + sides might there have infected them; but the terror of the inhabitants + who knew better than they what the thing meant, did not much shake them. + For one moment many of the people stood in the street motionless, pale, + and staring; the next they all began to run, some for the gateway, but the + greater part up the street, staggering as they ran. The movement of the + ground was indeed small—not more, perhaps, than half an inch in any + direction—but fear and imagination weakened all their limbs. They + had not run far, however, before the terrible unrest ceased as suddenly as + it had begun. + </p> + <p> + The English pair drew a long breath where they stood—for they had + not stirred a step, or indeed thought whither to run—and imagining + it over for a hundred years, looked around them. Their guide had + disappeared. The two donkeys stood perfectly still with their heads + hanging down. They seemed in deep dejection, and incapable of movement. A + few men only were yet to be seen. They were running up the street. In a + moment more it would be empty. They were the last of those that had let + the women go to church without them. They were hurrying to join them in + the sanctuary, the one safe place: the rest of the town might be shaken in + heaps on its foundations, but the church would stand! Guessing their goal, + the Porsons followed them. But they were neither of a build nor in a + condition to make haste, and the road was uphill. No one place, however, + was far from another within the toy-town, and they came presently to an + open <i>piazza</i>, on the upper side of which rose the great church. It + had a square front, masking with its squareness the triangular gable of + the building. Upon this screen, in the brightest of colours, magenta and + sky-blue predominating, was represented the day of judgment—the + mother seated on the right hand of the judge, and casting a pitiful look + upon the miserable assembly on her left. The square was a good deal on the + slope, and as they went slowly up to the church, they kept looking at the + picture. The last tatters of the skirt of the crowd had disappeared + through the great door, and but for themselves the square was empty. All + at once the picture at which they were gazing, the spread of wall on which + it was painted, the whole bulk of the huge building began to shudder, and + went on shuddering—“just,” Mr. Porson used to say when describing + the thing to a friend, “like the skin of a horse determined to get rid of + a gad-fly.” The same moment the tiles on the roof began to clatter like so + many castanets in the hands of giants, and the ground to wriggle and + heave. But they were too much absorbed in what was before their eyes to + heed much what went on under their feet. The oscillatory displacement of + the front of the church did not at most seem to cover more than a + hand-breadth, but it was enough. Down came the plaster surface, with the + judge and his mother, clashing on the pavement below, while the good and + the bad yet stood trembling. A few of the people came running out, + thinking the open square after all safer than the church, but there was no + rush to the open air. The shaking had lasted about twenty seconds, or at + most half a minute, when, without indication to the eyes watching the + front, there came a roaring crash and a huge rumbling, through and far + above which, rose a multitudinous shriek of terror, dismay, and agony, and + a number of men and women issued as if shot from a catapult. Then a few + came straggling out, and then—no more. The roof had fallen upon the + rest. + </p> + <p> + With the first rush from the church, the shaking ceased utterly, and the + still earth seemed again the immovable thing the English spectators had + conceived her. Of what had taken place there was little sign on the earth, + no sign in the blue sun-glorious heaven; only in the air there was a cloud + of dust so thick as to look almost solid, and from the cloud, as it + seemed, came a ghastly cry, mingled of shrieks and groans and articulate + appeals for help. The cry kept on issuing, while the calm front of the + church, dominated by that frightful canopy, went on displaying the + assembled nations delivered from their awful judge. While the multitude + groaned within, it spread itself out to the sun in silent composure, + welcoming and cherishing his rays in what was left of its gorgeous hues. + </p> + <p> + The Porsons stood for a moment stunned, came to their senses, and made + haste to enter the building. With white faces and trembling hands, they + drew aside the heavy leather curtain that hung within the great door, but + could for a moment see nothing; the air inside seemed filled with a solid + yellow dust As their eyes recovered from the sudden change of sunlight for + gloom, however, they began to distinguish the larger outlines, and + perceived that the floor was one confused heap of rafters and bricks and + tiles and stones and lime. The centre of the roof had been a great dome; + now there was nothing between their eyes and the clear heaven but the + slowly vanishing cloud of ruin. In the mound below they could at first + distinguish nothing human—could not have told, in the dim chaos, + limbs from broken rafters. Eager to help, they dared not set their feet + upon the mass—not that they feared the walls which another shock + might bring upon their heads, but that they shuddered lest their own added + weight should crush some live human creature they could not descry. Three + or four who had received little or no hurt, were moving about the edges of + the heap, vaguely trying to lift now this, now that, but yielding each + attempt in despair, either from its evident uselessness, or for lack of + energy. They would give a pull at a beam that lay across some writhing + figure, find it immovable, and turn with a groan to some farther cry. How + or where were they to help? Others began to come in with white faces and + terror-stricken eyes; and before long the sepulchral ruin had little + groups all over it, endeavouring in shiftless fashion to bring rescue to + the prisoned souls. + </p> + <p> + The Porsons saw nothing they could do. Great beams and rafters which it + was beyond their power to move an inch, lay crossed in all directions; and + they could hold little communication with those who were in a fashion at + work. Alas, they were little better than vainly busy, while the louder + moans accompanying their attempts revealed that they added to the tortures + of those they sought to deliver! The two saw more plainly now, and could + distinguish contorted limbs, and here and there a countenance. The + silence, more and more seldom broken, was growing itself terrible. Had + they known how many were buried there, they would have wondered so few + were left able to cry out. At moments there was absolute stillness in the + dreadful place. The heart of Mrs. Porson began to sink. + </p> + <p> + “Do come out,” she whispered, afraid of her own voice. “I feel so sick and + faint, I fear I shall drop.” + </p> + <p> + As she spoke something touched her leg. She gave a cry and started aside. + It was a hand, but of the body to which it belonged nothing could be seen. + It must have been its last movement; now it stuck there motionless. Then + they spied amid sad sights a sadder still. Upon the heap, a little way + from its edge, sat a child of about three, dressed like a sailor, gazing + down at something—they could not see what. Going a little nearer, + they saw it—the face of a fair woman, evidently English, who lay + dead, with a great beam across her heart. The child showed no trace of + tears; his white face seemed frozen. The stillness upon it was not + despair, but suggested a world in which hope had never yet been born. Pity + drove Mrs. Porson's sickness away. + </p> + <p> + “My dear!” she said; but the child took no heed. Her voice, however, + seemed to wake something in him. He started to his feet, and rushing at + the beam, began to tug at it with his tiny hands. Mrs. Porson burst into + tears. + </p> + <p> + “It's no use, darling!” she cried. + </p> + <p> + “Wake mamma!” he said, turning, and looking up at her. + </p> + <p> + “She will not wake,” sobbed Mrs. Porson. + </p> + <p> + Her husband stood by speechless, choking back the tears of which, being an + Englishman, he was ashamed. + </p> + <p> + “She <i>will</i> wake,” returned the boy. “She always wakes when I kiss + her.” + </p> + <p> + He knelt beside her, to prove upon her white face the efficacy of the + measure he had never until now known to fail. That he had already tried it + was plain, for he had kissed away much of the dust, though none of the + death. When once more he found that she did not even close her lips to + return his passionate salute, he desisted. With that saddest of things, a + child's sigh, and a look that seemed to Mrs. Porson to embody the riddle + of humanity, he reseated himself on the beam, with his little feet on his + mother's bosom, where so often she had made them warm. He did not weep; he + did not fix his eyes on his mother; his look was level and moveless and + set upon nothing. He seemed to have before him an utter blank—as if + the outer wall of creation had risen frowning in front, and he knew there + was nothing behind it but chaos. + </p> + <p> + “Where is your papa?” asked Mr. Porson. + </p> + <p> + The boy looked round bewildered. + </p> + <p> + “Gone,” he answered; nor could they get anything more from him. + </p> + <p> + “Was your papa with you here?” asked Mrs. Porson. + </p> + <p> + He answered only with the word <i>Gone</i>, uttered in a dazed fashion. + </p> + <p> + By this time all the men left in the town were doing their best, under the + direction of an intelligent man, the priest of a neighbouring parish. They + had already got one or two out alive, and their own priest dead. They + worked well, their terror of the lurking earthquake forgotten in their + eagerness to rescue. From their ignorance of the language, however, Mr. + Porson saw they could be of little use; and in dread of doing more harm + than good, he judged it better to go. + </p> + <p> + They stood one moment and looked at each other in silence. The child had + dropped from the beam, and lay fast asleep across his mother's bosom, with + his head on a lump of mortar. Without a word spoken, Mrs. Person, picking + her way carefully to the spot, knelt down by the dead mother, tenderly + kissed her cheek, lifted the sleeping child, and with all the awe, and + nearly all the tremulous joy of first motherhood, bore him to her husband. + The throes of the earthquake had slain the parents, and given the child + into their arms. Without look of consultation, mark of difference, or sign + of agreement, they turned in silence and left the terrible church, with + the clear summer sky looking in upon its dead. + </p> + <p> + As they passed the door, the sun met them shining with all his might. The + sea, far away across the tops of hills and the clefts of valleys, lay + basking in his glory. The hot air quivered all over the wide landscape. + From the flight of steps in front of the church they looked down on the + streets of the town, and beyond them into space. It looked the best of all + possible worlds—as neither plague, famine, pestilence, earthquakes, + nor human wrongs, persuade me it is not, judged by the high intent of its + existence. When a man knows that intent, as I dare to think I do, <i>then</i> + let him say, and not till then, whether it be a good world or not. That in + the midst of the splendour of the sunny day, in the midst of olives and + oranges, grapes and figs, ripening swiftly by the fervour of the + circumambient air, should lie that charnel-church, is a terrible fact, + neither to be ignored, nor to be explained by the paltry theory of the + greatest good to the greatest number; but the end of the maker's dream is + not this. + </p> + <p> + When they turned into the street that led to the gate, they found the + donkeys standing where they had left them. Their owner was not with them. + He had gone into the church with the rest, and was killed. When they + caught sight of the patient, dejected animals, unheeded and unheeding, + then first they spoke, whispering in the awful stillness of the world: + they must take the creatures, and make the best of their way back without + a guide! They judged that, as the road was chiefly down hill, and the + donkeys would be going home, they would not have much difficulty with + them. At the worst, short and stout as they were, they were not bad + walkers, and felt more than equal to carrying the child between them. Not + a person was in the street when they mounted; almost all were in the + church, at its strange, terrible service. Mrs. Porson mounted the + strongest of the animals, her husband placed the sleeping child in her + arms, and they started, he on foot by the side of his wife, and his donkey + following. No one saw them pass through the gate of the town. + </p> + <p> + They were not sure of the way, for they had been partly asleep as they + came, but so long as they went downward, and did not leave the road, they + could hardly go wrong! The child slept all the way. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0004" id="link2HCH0004"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter IV. The new family. + </h2> + <p> + How shall a man describe what passed in the mind of a childless wife, with + a motherless boy in her arms! It is the loveliest provision, doubtless, + that every child should have a mother of his own; but there is a + mother-love—which I had almost called more divine—the love, + namely, that a woman bears to a child because he is a child, regardless of + whether he be her own or another's. It is that they may learn to love + thus, that women have children. Some women love so without having any. No + conceivable treasure of the world could have once entered into comparison + with the burden of richness Mrs. Porson bore. She told afterward, with + voice hushed by fear of irreverence, how, as they went down one of the + hills, she slept for a moment, and dreamed that she was Mary with the holy + thing in her arms, fleeing to Egypt on the ass, with Joseph, her husband, + walking by her side. For years and years they had been longing for a child—and + here lay the divinest little one, with every mark of the kingdom upon him! + His father and mother lying crushed under the fallen dome of that fearful + church, was it strange he should seem to belong to her? + </p> + <p> + But there might be some one somewhere in the world with a better claim; + possibly—horrible thought!—with more need of him than she! Up + started a hideous cupidity, a fierce temptation to dishonesty, such as she + had never imagined. We do not know what is in us until the temptation + comes. Then there is the devil to fight. And Mrs. Porson fought him. + </p> + <p> + Mr. Porson was, in a milder degree, affected much as his wife. He could + not help wishing, nor was he wrong in wishing, that, since the child's + father and mother were gone, they might take their place, and love their + orphan. They were far from rich, but what was one child! They might surely + manage to give him a good education, and set him doing for himself! But, + alas, there might be others—others with love-property in the child! + The same thoughts were working in each, but neither dared utter them in + the presence of the sleeping treasure. + </p> + <p> + As they descended the last slope above the town, with the wide sea-horizon + before them, they beheld such a glory of after-sunset as, even on that + coast, was unusual. A chord of colour that might have been the prostrate + fragment of a gigantic rainbow, lay along a large arc of the horizon. The + farther portion of the sea was an indigo blue, save for a grayish line + that parted it from the dusky red of the sky. This red faded up through + orange and dingy yellow to a pale green and pale blue, above which came + the depth of the blue night, in which rayed resplendent the evening star. + Below the star and nearer to the west, lay, very thin and very long, the + sickle of the new moon. If death be what it looks to the unthinking soul, + and if the heavens declare the glory of God, as they do indeed to the + heart that knows him, then is there discord between heaven and earth such + as no argument can harmonize. But death is not what men think it, for + “Blessed are they that mourn for the dead.” + </p> + <p> + The sight enhanced the wonder and hope of the two honest good souls in the + treasure they carried. Out of the bosom of the skeleton Death himself, had + been given them—into their very arms—a germ of life, a jewel + of heaven! At the thought of what lay up the hill behind them, they felt + their joy in the child almost wicked; but if God had taken the child's + father and mother, might they not be glad in the hope that he had chosen + them to replace them? That he had for the moment at least, they were bound + to believe! + </p> + <p> + They travelled slowly on, through the dying sunset, and an hour or two of + the star-bright night that followed, adorned rather than lighted by the + quaint boat of the crescent moon. Weary, but lapt in a voiceless triumph, + they came at last, guided by the donkeys, to their hotel. + </p> + <p> + All were talking of the earthquake. A great part of the English had fled + in a panic terror, like sheep that had no shepherd—hunted by their + own fears, and betrayed by their imagined faith. The steadiest church-goer + fled like the infidel he reviled. The fool said in his heart, “There is no + God,” and fled. The Christian said with his mouth, “Verily there is a God + that ruleth in the earth!” and fled—far as he could from the place + which, as he fancied, had shown signs of a special presence of the father + of Jesus Christ. + </p> + <p> + After the Persons were in the house, there came two or three small shocks. + Every time, out with a cry rushed the inhabitants into the streets; every + time, out into the garden of the hotel swarmed such as were left in it of + Germans and English. But our little couple, who had that day seen so much + more of its terrors than any one else in the place, and whose chamber was + at the top of the house where the swaying was worst, were too much + absorbed in watching and tending their lovely boy to heed the earthquake. + Perhaps their hearts whispered, “Can that which has given us such a gift + be unfriendly?” + </p> + <p> + “If his father and mother,” said Mrs. Person, as they stood regarding him, + “are permitted to see their child, they shall see how we love him, and be + willing he should love us!” + </p> + <p> + As they went up the stairs with him, the boy woke When he looked and saw a + face that was not his mother's, a cloud swept across the heaven of his + eyes. He closed them again, and did not speak. The first of the shocks + came as they were putting him to bed: he turned very white and looked up + fixedly, as if waiting another fall from above, but sat motionless on his + new mother's lap. The instant the vibration and rocking ceased, he drank + from the cup of milk she offered him, as quietly as if but a distant + thunder had rolled away. When she put him in the bed, he looked at her + with such an indescribable expression of bewildered loss, that she burst + into tears. The child did not cry. He had not cried since they took him. + The woman's heart was like to break for him, but she managed to say, + </p> + <p> + “God has taken her, my darling. He is keeping her for you, and I am going + to keep you for her;” and with that she kissed him. + </p> + <p> + The same moment came the second shock. + </p> + <p> + Need wakes prophecy: the need of the child made of the parson a prophet. + </p> + <p> + “It is God that does the shaking,” he said. “It's all right. Nobody will + be the worse—not much, at least!” + </p> + <p> + “Not at all,” rejoined the boy, and turned his face away. + </p> + <p> + From the lips of such a tiny child, the words seemed almost awful. + </p> + <p> + He fell fast asleep, and never woke till the morning. Mrs. Porson lay + beside him, yielding him, stout as she was, a good half of the little + Italian bed. She scarcely slept for excitement and fear of smothering him. + </p> + <p> + The Persons were honest people, and for all their desire to possess the + child, made no secret of how and where they had found him, or of as much + of his name as he could tell them, which was only <i>Clare</i>. But they + never heard of inquiry after him. On the gunboat at Genoa they knew + nothing of their commander's purposes, or where to seek him. Days passed + before they began to be uneasy about him, and when they did make what + search for him they could, it was fruitless. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0005" id="link2HCH0005"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter V. His new home. + </h2> + <p> + The place to which the good people carried the gift of the earthquake—carried + him with much anxiety and more exultation—had no very distinctive + features. It had many fields in grass, many in crop, and some lying fallow—all + softly undulating. It had some trees, and everywhere hedges dividing + fields whose strange shapes witnessed to a complicated history, of which + few could tell anything. Here and there in the hollows between the + motionless earth-billows, flowed, but did not seem to flow, what they + called a brook. But the brooks there were like deep soundless pools + without beginning or end. There was no life, no gaiety, no song in them, + only a sullen consent to exist. That at least is how they impress one + accustomed to real brooks, lark-like, always on the quiver, always on the + move, always babbling and gabbling and gamboling, always at their games, + always tossing their pebbles about, and telling them to talk. A man that + loved them might say there was more in the silence of these, than in the + speech of those; but what silence can be better than a song of delight + that we are, that we were, that we are to be! The stillness may be full of + solemn fish, mysterious as itself, and deaf with secrets; but blessed is + the brook that lets the light of its joy shine. + </p> + <p> + Dull as the place must seem in this my description, it was the very + country for the boy. He would come into more contact with its modest + beauty in a day than some of us would in a year. Nobody quite knows the + beauty of a country, especially of a quiet country, except one who has + been born in it, or for whom at least childhood and boyhood and youth have + opened door after door into the hidden phases of its life. There is no + square yard on the face of the earth but some one can in part understand + what God meant in making it; while the same changeful skies canopy the + most picturesque and the dullest landscapes; the same winds wake and blow + over desert and pasture land, making the bosoms of youth and age swell + with the delight of their blowing. The winds are not all so full as are + some of delicious odours gathered as they pass from gardens, fields, and + hill-sides; but all have their burden of sweetness. Those that blew upon + little Clare were oftener filled with the smell of farmyards, and burning + weeds, and cottage-fires, than of flowers; but never would one of such + odours revisit him without bringing fresh delight to his heart. Its mere + memorial suggestion far out on the great sea would wake the old child in + the man. The pollards along the brooks grew lovely to his heart, and were + not the less lovely when he came to understand that they were not so + lovely as God had meant them to be. He was one of those who, regarding + what a thing <i>is</i>, and not comparing it with other things, descry the + thought of God in it, and love it; for to love what is beautiful is as + natural as to love our mothers. + </p> + <p> + The parsonage to which his new father and mother brought him was like the + landscape—humble. It was humble even for a parsonage—which has + no occasion to be fine. For men and women whose business it is to teach + their fellows to be true and fair, and not covet fine things, are but + hypocrites, or at best intruders and humbugs, if they want fine things + themselves. Jesus Christ did not care about fine things. He loved every + lovely thing that ever his father made. If any one does not know the + difference between fine things and lovely things, he does not know much, + if he has all the science in the world at his finger-ends. + </p> + <p> + One good thing about the parsonage was, that it was aid, and the swallows + had loved it for centuries. That way Clare learned to love the swallows—and + they are worth loving. Then it had a very old garden, nearly as + old-fashioned as it was old, and many flowers that have almost ceased to + be seen grew in it, and did not enjoy their lives the less that they were + out of fashion. All the furniture in the house was old, and mostly shabby; + it was possible, therefore, to love it a little. Who on earth could be + such a fool as to love a new piece of furniture! One might prize it; one + might admire it; one might like it because it was pretty, or because it + was comfortable; but only a silly woman whose soul went to bed on her new + sideboard, could say she loved it. And then it would not be true. It is + impossible that any but an <i>old</i> piece of furniture should be loved. + </p> + <p> + His father and mother had a charming little room made for him in the + garret, right up among the swallows, who soon admitted him a member of + their society—an honorary member, that is, who was not expected to + fly with them to Africa except he liked. His new parents did this because + they saw that, when he could not be with them, he preferred being by + himself; and that moods came upon him in which he would steal away even + from them, seized with a longing for loneliness. In general, next to being + with his mother anywhere, he liked to be with his father in the study. If + both went out, and could not take him with them, he would either go to his + own room, or sit in the study alone. It was a very untidy room, crowded + with books, mostly old and dingy, and in torn bindings. Many of them their + owner never opened, and they suffered in consequence; a few of them were + constantly in his hands, and suffered in consequence. All smelt strong of + stale tobacco, but that hardly accounts for the fact that Clare never took + to smoking. Another thing perhaps does—that he was always too much + of a man to want to look like a man by imitating men. That is unmanly. A + boy who wants to look like a man is not a manly boy, and men do not care + for his company. A true boy is always welcome to a true man, but a + would-be man is better on the other side of the wall. + </p> + <p> + His mother oftenest sat in a tiny little drawing-room, which smelt of + withered rose-leaves. I think it must smell of them still. I believe it + smelt of them a hundred years before she saw the place. Clare loved the + smell of the rose-leaves and disliked the smell of the tobacco; yet he + preferred the study with its dingy books to the pretty drawing-room + without his mother. + </p> + <p> + There was a village, a very small one, in the parish, and a good many + farm-houses. + </p> + <p> + Such was the place in which Clare spent the next few years of his life, + and there his new parents loved him heartily. The only thing about him + that troubled them, besides the possibility of losing him, was, that they + could not draw out the tiniest smile upon his sweet, moonlight-face. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0006" id="link2HCH0006"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter VI. What did draw out his first smile. + </h2> + <p> + Mr. Porson was a man about five and forty; his wife was a few years + younger. His theories of religion were neither large nor lofty; he + accepted those that were handed down to him, and did not trouble himself + as to whether they were correct. He did what was better: he tried + constantly to obey the law of God, whether he found it in the Bible or in + his own heart. Thus he was greater in the kingdom of heaven than thousands + that knew more, had better theories about God, and could talk much more + fluently concerning religion than he. By obeying God he let God teach him. + So his heart was always growing; and where the heart grows, there is no + fear of the intellect; there it also grows, and in the best fashion of + growth. He was very good to his people, and not foolishly kind. He tried + his best to help them to be what they ought to be, to make them bear their + troubles, be true to one another, and govern themselves. He was like a + father to them. For some, of course, he could do but little, because they + were locked boxes with nothing in them; but for a few he did much. Perhaps + it was because he was so good to his flock that God gave him little Clare + to bring up. Perhaps it was because he and his wife were so good to Clare, + that by and by a wonderful thing took place. + </p> + <p> + About three years after the earthquake, Mrs. Porson had a baby-girl sent + her for her very own. The father and mother thought themselves the + happiest couple on the face of the earth—and who knows but they + were! If they were not, so much the better! for then, happy as they were, + there were happier yet than they; and who, in his greatest happiness, + would not be happier still to know that the earth held happier than he! + </p> + <p> + When Clare first saw the baby, he looked down on her with solemn, unmoved + countenance, and gazed changeless for a whole minute. He thought there had + been another earthquake, that another church-dome had fallen, and another + child been found and brought home from the ruin. Then light began to grow + somewhere under his face. His mother, full as was her heart of her new + child, watched his countenance anxiously. The light under his face grew + and grew, till his face was radiant. Then out of the midst of the shining + broke the heavenliest smile she had ever seen on human countenance—a + smile that was a clearer revelation of God than ten thousand books about + him. For what must not that God be, who had made the boy that smiled such + a smile and never knew it! After this he smiled occasionally, though it + was but seldom. He never laughed—that is, not until years after this + time; but, on the other hand, he never looked sullen. A quiet peace, like + the stillness of a long summer twilight in the north, dwelt upon his + visage, and appeared to model his every motion. Part of his life seemed + away, and he waiting for it to come back. Then he would be merry! + </p> + <p> + He was never in a hurry, yet always doing something—always, that is, + when he was not in his own room. There his mother would sometimes find him + sitting absolutely still, with his hands on his knees. Nor was she sorry + to surprise him thus, for then she was sure of one of his rare smiles. She + thought he must then be dreaming of his own mother, and a pang would go + through her at the thought that he would one day love her more than + herself. “He will laugh then!” she said. She did not think how the + gratitude of that mother would one day overwhelm her with gladness. + </p> + <p> + He never sought to be caressed, but always snuggled to one that drew him + close. Never once did he push any one away. He learned what lessons were + set him—not very fast, but with persistent endeavour to understand. + He was greatly given to reading, but not particularly quick. He thus + escaped much, fancying that he knew when he did not know—a quicksand + into which fall so many clever boys and girls. Give me a slow, steady boy, + who knows when he does not know a thing! To know that you do not know, is + to be a small prophet. Such a boy has a glimmer of the something he does + not know, or at least of the place where it is; while the boy who easily + grasps the words that stand for a thing, is apt to think he knows the + thing itself when he sees but the wrapper of it—thinks he knows the + church when he has caught sight of the weather-cock. Mrs. Porson could see + the understanding of a thing gradually burst into blossom on the boy's + face. It did not smile, it only shone. Understanding is light; it needs + love to change light into a smile. + </p> + <p> + There was something in the boy that his parents hardly hoped to + understand; something in his face that made them long to know what was + going on in him, but made them doubt if ever in this life they should. He + was not concealing anything from them. He did not know that he had + anything to tell, or that they wanted to know anything. He never doubted + that everybody saw him just as he felt himself; his soul seemed bare to + all the world. But he knew little of what was passing in him: child or man + never knows more than a small part of that. + </p> + <p> + When first he was allowed to take the little one in his arms, he sitting + on a stool at his mother's feet, it was almost a new start in his + existence. A new confidence was born in his spirit. Mrs. Person could + read, as if reflected in his countenance, the pride and tenderness that + composed so much of her own conscious motherhood. A certain staidness, + almost sternness, took possession of his face as he bent over the helpless + creature, half on his knees, half in his arms—the sternness of a + protecting divinity that knew danger not afar. He had taken a step upward + in being; he was aware in himself, without knowing it, of the dignity of + fatherhood. Even now he knew what so many seem never to learn, that a man + is the defender of the weak; that, if a man is his brother's keeper, still + more is he his sister's. She belonged to him, therefore he was hers in the + slavery of love, which alone is freedom. So reverential and so careful did + he show himself, that soon his mother trusted him, to the extent of his + power, more than any nurse. + </p> + <p> + By and by she made the delightful discovery that, when he was alone with + the baby, the silent boy could talk. Where was no need or hope of being + understood, his words began to flow—with a rhythmical cadence that + seemed ever on the verge of verse. When first his mother heard the sweet + murmur of his voice, she listened; and then first she learned what a hold + the terrible thing that had given him into her arms had upon him. For she + heard him half singing, half saying— + </p> + <p> + “Baby, baby, do not grow. Keep small, and lie on my lap, and dream of + walking, but never walk; for when you walk you will run, and when you run + you will go away with father and mother—away to a big place where + the ground goes up to the sky; and you will go up the ground that goes up + to the sky, and you will come to a big church, and you will go into the + church; and the ground and the church and the sky will go <i>hurr, hurr, + hurr</i>; and the sky, full of angels, will come down with a great roar; + and all the yards and sails will drop out of the sky, and tumble down + father and mother, and hold them down that they cannot get up again; and + then you will have nobody but me. I will do all I can, but I am only + brother Clare, and you will want, want, want mother and father, mother and + father, and they will be always coming, and never be come, not for ever so + long! Don't grow a big girl, Maly!” + </p> + <p> + The mother could not think what to say. She went in, and, in the hope of + turning his thoughts aside, took the baby, and made haste to consult her + husband. + </p> + <p> + “We must leave it,” said Mr. Person. “Experience will soon correct what + mistake is in his notion. It is not so very far wrong. You and I must go + from them one day: what is it but that the sky will fall down on us, and + our bodies will get up no more! He thinks the time nearer at hand than for + their sakes I hope it is; but nobody can tell.” + </p> + <p> + Clare never associated the church where the awful thing took place, with + the church to which he went on Sundays. The time for it, he imagined, came + to everybody. To Clare, nothing ever <i>happened</i>. The way out of the + world was a church in a city set on a hill, and there an earthquake was + always ready. + </p> + <p> + The heart of his adoptive mother grew yet more tender toward him after the + coming of her own child. She was not quite sure that she did not love him + even more than Mary. She could not help the feeling that he was a child of + heaven sent out to nurse on the earth; and that it was in reward for her + care of him that her own darling was sent her. That their love to the boy + had something to do with the coming of the girl, I believe myself, though + what that something was, I do not precisely understand. + </p> + <p> + She left him less often alone with the child. She would not have his + thoughts drawn to the church of the earthquake; neither would she have the + mournfulness of his sweet voice much in the ears of her baby. He never + sang in a minor key when any one was by, but always and solely when the + baby and he were alone together. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0007" id="link2HCH0007"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter VII. Clare and his brothers. + </h2> + <p> + After a year or two, Mr. Person became anxious lest the boy should grow up + too unlike other boys—lest he should not be manly, but of a too + gently sad behaviour. He began, therefore, to take him with him about the + parish, and was delighted to find him show extraordinary endurance. He + would walk many miles, and come home less fatigued than his companion. To + be sure, he had not much weight to carry; but it seemed to Mr. Porson that + his utter freedom from thought about himself had a large share in his + immunity from weariness. He continued slight and thin—which was + natural, for he was growing fast; but the muscles of his little bird-like + legs seemed of steel. The spindle-shanks went striding, striding without a + check, along the roughest roads, the pale face shining atop of them like a + sweet calm moon. To Mr. Person's eyes, the moon, stooping, as she + sometimes seems to do, downward from the sky, always looked like him. The + child woke something new in the heart and mind of every one that loved + him, but was himself unconscious of his influence. His company was no + check to his father when meditating, after his habit as he walked, what he + should say to his people the next Sunday. For the good man never wrote or + read a sermon, but talked to his people as one who would meet what was in + them with what was in him. Hence they always believed “the parson meant + it.” He never said anything clever, and never said anything unwise; never + amused them, and never made them feel scornful, either of him or of any + one else. + </p> + <p> + Instead of finding the presence of Clare distract his thoughts, he had at + times a curious sense that the boy was teaching him—that his sermon + was running before, or walking sedately on this side of him or that. For + Clare could run like the wind; and did run after butterflies, + dragon-flies, or anything that offered a chance of seeing it nearer; but + he never killed, and seldom tried to catch anything, if but for a moment's + examination. The swiftest run would scarcely heighten the colour of his + pale cheeks. + </p> + <p> + He soon came to be known in the farm-houses of the parish. The + farmer-families were a little shy of him at first, fancying him too fine a + little gentleman for them; but as they got to know him, they grew fond of + him. They called him “the parson's man,” which pleased Clare. But one old + woman called him “the parson's cherubim.” + </p> + <p> + One day Mr. Porson was calling at the house of the largest farm in the + parish, the nearest house to the parsonage. The farmer's wife was ill, and + having to go to her room to see her, he said to the boy— + </p> + <p> + “Clare, you run into the yard. Give my compliments to any one you meet, + and ask him to let you stay with him.” + </p> + <p> + When the time came for their departure, Mr. Porson went to find him. He + did not call him; he wanted to see what he was about. Unable to discover + him, and coming upon no one of whom he might inquire, for it was hay-time + and everybody in the fields, he was at last driven to use his voice. + </p> + <p> + He had not to call twice. Out of the covered part of the pigsty, not far + from which the parson stood, the boy came creeping on all fours, followed + by a litter of half-grown, grunting, gamboling pigs. + </p> + <p> + “Here I am, papa!” he cried. + </p> + <p> + “Clare,” exclaimed his father, “what a mess you have made of yourself!” + </p> + <p> + “I gave them your compliments,” answered the boy, as he scrambled over the + fence with his father's assistance, “and asked them if I might stay with + them till you were ready. They said yes, and invited me in. I went in; and + we've been having such games! They were very kind to me.” + </p> + <p> + His father turned involuntarily and looked into the sty. There stood all + the pigs in a row, gazing after the boy, and looking as sorry as their + thick skins and bony snouts would let them. Their mother rose in a ridge + behind them, gazing too. Mr. Skymer always spoke of pigs as about the most + intelligent animals in the world. + </p> + <p> + I do not know when or where or how his love of the animals began, for he + could not tell me. If it began with the pigs, it was far from ending with + them. + </p> + <p> + The next day he asked his father if he might go and call upon the pigs. + </p> + <p> + “Have you forgotten, Clare,” said his mother, “what a job Susan and I had + with your clothes? I wonder still how you could have done such a thing! + They were quite filthy. When I saw you, I had half a mind to put you in a + bath, clothes and all. I doubt if they are sweet yet!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, yes, they are, indeed, mamma!” returned Clare; “and you know I shall + be careful after this! I shall not go into their house, but get the farmer + to let them out. I've thought of a new game with them!” + </p> + <p> + His mother consented; the farmer did let the pigs out; and Clare and they + had a right good game together among the ricks in the yard. + </p> + <p> + His growing nature showed itself in a swiftly widening friendship for live + things. The spreading ripples of his affection took in the cows and the + horses, the hens and the geese, and every creature about the place, till + at length it had to pull up at the moles, because he could not get at + them. I doubt if he would have liked them if he had seen one eat a frog! + He called the pigs little brothers, and the horses and cows big brothers, + and was perfectly at home with them before people knew he cared for their + company. I think his absolute simplicity brought him near to the fountain + of life, or rather, prevented him from straying from it; and this kept him + so alive himself, that he was delicately sensitive to all life. He felt + himself pledged to all other life as being one with it. Its forms were + therefore so open to him as to seem familiar from the first. He knew + instinctively what went on in regions of life differing from his own—knew, + without knowing how, what the animals were thinking and feeling; so was + able to interpret their motions, even the sudden changes in their + behaviour. + </p> + <p> + There was one dangerous animal on the place—a bull, of which the + farmer had often said he must part with him, or he would be the death of + somebody. One morning he was struck with terror to find Clare in the stall + with Nimrod. The brute was chained up pretty short, but was free enough + for terrible mischief: Clare was stroking his nose, and the beast was + standing as still as a bull of bronze, with one curved and one sharp, + forward-set, wicked-looking horn in alarming proximity to the angelic + face. The farmer stood in dismay, still as the bull, afraid to move. Clare + looked up and smiled, but his delicate little hand went on caressing the + huge head. It was one of God's small high creatures visiting with good + news of hope one of his big low creatures—a little brother of Jesus + Christ bringing a taste of his father's kingdom to his great dull bull of + a brother. The farmer called him. The boy came at once. Mr. Goodenough + told him he must not go near the bull; he was fierce and dangerous. Clare + informed him that he and the bull had been friends for a long time; and to + prove it ran back, and before the farmer could lay hold of him, was + perched on the animal's shoulders. The bull went on eating the grass in + the manger before him, and took as little heed of the boy as if it were + but a fly that had lighted on him, and neither tickled nor stung him. + </p> + <p> + By degrees he grew familiar with all the goings on at the farm, and drew + nearer to a true relation with the earth that nourishes all. Where the + soil was not too heavy, the ploughman would set him on the back of the + near horse, and there he would ride in triumph to the music of the + ploughman's whistle behind. His was not the pomp of the destroyer who + rides trampling, but the pomp of the saviour drawing forth life from the + earth. In the summer the hayfield knew him, and in the autumn the + harvest-field, where busily he gathered what the earth gave, and for + himself strength, a sense of wide life and large relations. The very + mould, not to say the grass-blades and the daisies, was dear to him. He + was more sympathetic with the daisies ploughed down than was even Burns, + for he had a strong feeling that they went somewhere, and were the better + for going; that this was the way their sky fell upon them. + </p> + <p> + All the people on the farm, all the people of the village, every one in + the parish knew the boy and his story. From his gentleness and + lovingkindness to live things, there were who said he was half-witted; + others said he saw ghosts. The boys of the village despised, and some + hated him, because he was so unlike them. They called him a girl because + where they tormented he caressed. At this he would smile, and they durst + not lay hands on him. + </p> + <p> + The days are long in boyhood, and Clare could do a many things in one. + There was the morning, the forenoon, and the long afternoon and evening! + He could help on the farm; he could play with ever so many animals; he + could learn his lessons, which happily were not heavy; he could read any + book he pleased in his father's library, where <i>Paradise Lost</i> was + his favourite; he could nurse little Maly. He had the more time for all + these that he had no companion of his own age, no one he wanted to go + about with after school-hours. His father was still his chief human + companion, and neither of them grew tired of the other. + </p> + <p> + The most remarkable thing in the child was the calm and gentle greatness + of his heart. You often find children very fond of one or two people, who, + perhaps, in evil return, want to keep them all to themselves, and reproach + them for loving others. Many persons count it a sign of depth in a child + that he loves only one or two. I doubt it greatly. I think that only the + child who loves all life can love right well, can love deeply and strongly + and tenderly the lives that come nearest him. Low nurses and small-hearted + mothers dwarf and pervert their children, doing their worst to keep them + from having big hearts like God. Clare had other teaching than this. He + had lost his father and mother, but many were given him to love; and so he + was helped to wait patiently till he found them again. God was keeping + them for him somewhere, and keeping him for them here. + </p> + <p> + The good for which we are born into this world is, that we may learn to + love. I think Clare the most enviable of boys, because he loved more than + any one of his age I have heard of. There are people—oh, such silly + people they are!—though they may sometimes be pleasing—who are + always wanting people to love them. They think so much of themselves, that + they want to think more; and to know that people love them makes them able + to think more of themselves. They even think themselves loving because + they are fond of being loved! You might as soon say because a man loves + money he is generous; because he loves to gather, therefore he knows how + to scatter; because he likes to read a story, therefore he can write one. + Such lovers are only selfish in a deeper way, and are more to blame than + other selfish people; for, loving to be loved, they ought the better to + know what an evil thing it is not to love; what a mean thing to accept + what they are not willing to give. Even to love only those that love us, + is, as the Lord has taught us, but a pinched and sneaking way of loving. + Clare never thought about being loved. He was too busy loving, with so + many about him to love, to think of himself. He was not the contemptible + little wretch to say, “What a fine boy I am, to make everybody love me!” + If he had been capable of that, not many would have loved him; and those + that did would most of them have got tired of loving a thing that did not + love again. Only great lovers like God are able to do that, and they help + God to make love grow. But there is little truth in love where there is no + wisdom in it. Clare's father and mother were wise, and did what they could + to make Clare wise. + </p> + <p> + Also the animals, though they were not aware of it, did much to save him + from being spoiled by the humans whom the boy loved more than them. For + Clare's charity began at home. Those who love their own people will love + other people. Those who do not love children will never love animals + right. + </p> + <p> + Here I will set down a strange thing that befell Clare, and caused him a + sore heart, making him feel like a traitor to the whole animal race, and + influencing his life for ever. I was at first puzzled to account for the + thing without attributing more imagination to the animals—or some of + them—than I had been prepared to do; but probably the main factor in + it was heart-disease. + </p> + <p> + He had seen men go out shooting, but had never accompanied any killers. I + do not quite understand how, as in my story, he came even to imitate using + a gun. There was nothing in him that belonged to killing; and that is more + than I could say for myself, or any other man I know except Clare Skymer. + </p> + <p> + He was at the bottom of the garden one afternoon, where nothing but a low + hedge came between him and a field of long grass. He had in his hand the + stick of a worn-out umbrella. Suddenly a half-grown rabbit rose in the + grass before him, and bolted. From sheer unconscious imitation, I believe, + he raised the stick to his shoulder, and said <i>Bang</i>. The rabbit gave + a great bound into the air, fell, and lay motionless. With far other + feelings than those of a sportsman, Clare ran, got through the hedge, and + approached the rabbit trembling. He could think nothing but that the + creature was playing him a trick. Yet he was frightened. Only how could he + have hurt him! + </p> + <p> + “I dare say the little one knows me,” he said to himself, “and wanted to + give me a start! He couldn't tell what a start it would be, or he wouldn't + have done it.” + </p> + <p> + When he drew near, however, “the little one” did not, as he had hoped and + expected, jump up and run again. With sinking heart Clare went close up, + and looked down on it. It lay stretched out, motionless. With death in his + own bosom he stooped and tenderly lifted it. The rabbit was stone-dead! + The poor boy gazed at it, pressed it tenderly to his heart, and went with + it to find his mother. The tears kept pouring down his face, but he + uttered no cry till he came to her. Then a low groaning howl burst from + him; he laid the dead thing in her lap, and threw himself on the floor at + her feet in an abandonment of self-accusation and despair. + </p> + <p> + It was long before he was able to give her an intelligible account of what + had taken place. She asked him if he had found it dead. In answer he could + only shake his head, but that head-shake had a whole tragedy in it. Then + she examined “the little one,” but could find no mark of any wound upon + it. When at length she learned how the case was, she tried to comfort him, + insisting he was not to blame, for he did not mean to kill the little one. + He would not hearken to her loving sophistry. + </p> + <p> + “No, mother!” he said through his sobs; “I wouldn't have blamed myself, + though I should have been very sorry, if I had killed him by accident—if + I had stepped upon him, or anything of that kind; but I meant to frighten + him! I looked bad at him! I made him think I was an enemy, and going to + kill him! I shammed bad—and so was real bad.” + </p> + <p> + He stopped with a most wailful howl. + </p> + <p> + “Perhaps he knew me,” he resumed, “and couldn't understand it. It was much + worse than if I had shot him. He wouldn't have known then till he was + dead. But to die of terror was horrible. Oh, why didn't I think what I was + doing?” + </p> + <p> + “Nobody could have thought of such a thing happening.” + </p> + <p> + “No; but I ought to have thought, mother, of what I was doing. I was + trying to frighten him! I must have been in a cruel mood. Why didn't I + think love to the little one when I saw him, instead of thinking death to + him? I shall never look a rabbit in the face again! My heart must have + grown black, mother!” + </p> + <p> + “I don't believe there is another rabbit in England would die from such a + cause,” persisted his mother thoughtfully. + </p> + <p> + “Then what a superior rabbit he must have been!” said Clare. “To think + that I pulled down the roof of his church upon him!” + </p> + <p> + He burst into a torrent of tears, and ran to his own room. There his + mother thought it better to leave him undisturbed. She wisely judged that + a mind of such sensibility was alone capable of finding the comfort to fit + its need. + </p> + <p> + Such comfort he doubtless did find, for by the time his mother called him + to tea, calmness had taken the place of the agony on his countenance. His + mother asked him no questions, for she as well as her husband feared any + possible encouragement to self-consciousness. I imagine the boy had + reflected that things could not go so wrong that nobody could set them + right. I imagine he thought that, if he had done the rabbit a wrong, as he + never for a moment to the end of his life doubted he had, he who is at the + head of all heads and the heart of all hearts, would contrive to let him + tell the rabbit he was sorry, and would give him something to do for the + rabbit that would make up for his cruelty to him. He did once say to his + mother, and neither of them again alluded to the matter, that he was sure + the rabbit had forgiven him. + </p> + <p> + “Little ones are <i>so</i> forgiving, you know, mother!” he added. + </p> + <p> + Is it any wonder that my friend Clare Skymer should have been no + sportsman? + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0008" id="link2HCH0008"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter VIII. Clare and his human brothers + </h2> + <p> + Another anecdote of him, that has no furtherance of the story in it, I + must yet tell. + </p> + <p> + One cold day in a stormy March, the wind was wildly blowing broken clouds + across the heavens, and now rain, now sleet, over the shivering blades of + the young corn, whose tender green was just tinging the dark brown earth. + The fields were now dark and wintry, heartless and cold; now shining all + over as with repentant tears; one moment refusing to be comforted, and the + next reviving with hope and a sense of new life. Clare was hovering about + the plough. Suddenly he spied, from a mound in the field, a little + procession passing along the highway. Those in front carried something on + their shoulders which must be heavy, for it took six of them to carry it. + He knew it was a coffin, for his home was by the churchyard, and a funeral + was no unfamiliar sight. Behind it one man walked alone. For a moment + Clare watched him, and saw his bowed head and heavy pace. His heart filled + from its own perennial fount of pity, which was God himself in him. He ran + down the hill and across the next field, making for a spot some distance + ahead of the procession. As it passed him, he joined the chief mourner, + who went plodding on with his arms hanging by his sides. Creeping close up + to him, he slid his little soft hand into the great horny hand of the + peasant. Instinctively the big hand closed upon the small one, and the + weather-beaten face of a man of fifty looked down on the boy. Not a word + was said between them. They walked on, hand in hand. + </p> + <p> + Neither had ever seen the other. The man was following his wife and his + one child to the grave. “Nothing almost sees miracles but misery,” says + Kent in <i>King Lear</i>. Because this man was miserable, he saw a miracle + where was no miracle, only something very good. The thing was true and + precious, yea, a message from heaven. Those deep, upturned, silent eyes; + the profound, divine sympathy that shone in them; the grasp of the tiny + hand upon his large fingers, made the heart of the man, who happened to be + a catholic, imagine, and for a few moments believe, that he held the hand + of the infant Saviour. The cloud lifted from his heart and brain, and did + not return when he came to understand that this was not <i>the</i> lamb of + God, only another lamb from the same fold. + </p> + <p> + When they had walked about two miles, the boy began to fear he might be + intruding, and would have taken his hand from the other, but the man held + it tight, and stooping whispered it was not far now. The child, who, + without knowing it, had taken the man under the protection of his love, + yielded at once, went with him to the grave, joined in the service, and + saw the grave filled. They went again as they had come. Not a word was + spoken. The man wept a little now and then, drew the back of his brown + hand across his eyes, and pressed a little closer the hand he held. At the + gate of the parsonage the boy took his leave. He said they would be + wondering what had become of him, or he would have gone farther. The man + released him without a word. + </p> + <p> + His mother had been uneasy about him, but when he told her how it was, she + said he had done right. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” returned the boy; “I belong there myself.” + </p> + <p> + The mother knew he was not thinking of the grave. + </p> + <p> + One more anecdote I will give, serving to introduce the narrative of the + following chapter, and helping to show the character of the boy. He was so + unlike most boys, that one must know all he may about him, if he would + understand him. + </p> + <p> + Never yet, strange as the assertion must seem, had the boy shown any + anger. His father was a little troubled at the fact, fearing such absence + of resentment might indicate moral indifference, or, if not, might yet + render him incapable of coping with the world. He had himself been brought + up at a public school, and had not, with all his experience of life, come + to see, any more than most of the readers of this story now see, or for a + long time will see, that there lies no nobility, no dignity in evil retort + of any kind; that evil is evil when returned as much as when given; that + the only shining thing is good—and the most shining, good for evil. + </p> + <p> + One day a coarse boy in the village gave him a sharp blow on the face. It + forced water from his eyes and blood from his nose. He was wiping away + both at once with his handkerchief, when a kindly girl stopped and said to + him— + </p> + <p> + “Never mind; don't cry.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, no!” answered Clare; “it's only water, it's not crying. It would be + cowardly to cry.” + </p> + <p> + “That's a brave boy! You'll give it him back one of these days.” + </p> + <p> + “No,” he returned, “I shall not I couldn't.” + </p> + <p> + “Why?” + </p> + <p> + “Because it hurts so. My nose feels as if it were broken. I know it's not + broken, but it feels like it.” + </p> + <p> + The girl, as well as the boys who stood around him, burst into laughter. + They saw no logic in his reasoning. Clare's was the divine reasoning that + comes of loving your neighbour; theirs was the earthly reasoning that came + of loving themselves. They did not see that to Clare another boy was + another of himself; that he was carrying out the design of the Father of + men, that his creatures should come together into one, not push each other + away. + </p> + <p> + The next time he met the boy who struck him, so far was he both from + resentment and from the fear of being misunderstood, that he offered him a + rosy-cheeked apple his mother had given him as he left for school. The boy + was tyrant and sneak together—a combination to be seen sometimes in + a working man set over his fellows, and in a rich man grown poor, and bent + upon making money again. The boy took the apple, never doubted Clare gave + it him to curry favour, ate it up grinning, and threw the core in his + face. Clare turned away with a sigh, and betook himself to his + handkerchief again, The boy burst into a guffaw of hideous laughter. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0009" id="link2HCH0009"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter IX. Clare the defender. + </h2> + <p> + This enemy was a trouble, more or less, to every decent person in the + neighbourhood. It was well his mother was a widow, for where she was only + powerless to restrain, the father would have encouraged. He was a big, + idle, sneering, insolent lad—such that had there been two more of + the sort, they would have made the village uninhabitable. It was all the + peaceable vicar could do to keep his hands off him. + </p> + <p> + One day, little Mary being then about five years old, Clare had her out + for a walk. They were alone in a narrow lane, not far from the farm where + Clare was so much at home. To his consternation, for he had his sister in + charge, down the lane, meeting them, came the village tyrant. He strolled + up with his hands in his pockets, and barred their way. But while, his eye + chiefly on Clare, he “straddled” like Apollyon, but not “quite over the + whole breadth of the way,” Mary slipped past him. The young brute darted + after the child. Clare put down his head, as he had seen the rams do, and + as Simpson, who ill deserved the name of the generous Jewish Hercules, was + on the point of laying hold of her, caught him in the flank, butted him + into the ditch, and fell on the top of him. + </p> + <p> + “Run, Maly!” he cried; “I'll be after you in a moment.” + </p> + <p> + “Will you, you little devil!” cried the bully; and taking him by the + throat, so that he could not utter even a gurgle, got up and began to beat + him unmercifully. But the sounds of their conflict had reached the ears of + the bull Nimrod, who was feeding within the hedge. He recognized Clare's + voice, perhaps knew from it that he was in trouble; but I am inclined to + think pure bull-love of a row would alone have sent him tearing to the + quarter whence the tyrant's brutal bellowing still came. There, looking + over the hedge, he saw his friend in the clutches of an enemy of his own, + for Simpson never lost a chance of teasing Nimrod when he could do so with + safety. Over he came with a short roar and a crash. Looking up, the bully + saw a bigger bully than himself, with his head down and horns level, + retreating a step or two in preparation for running at him. Simpson shoved + the helpless Clare toward the enemy and fled. Clare fell. Nimrod jumped + over his prostrate friend and tore after Simpson. Clare got up and would + at once have followed to protect his enemy, but that he must first see his + sister safe. He ran with her to a cottage hard by, handed her to the woman + at the door of it, and turning pursued Simpson and the bull. + </p> + <p> + Nimrod overtook his enemy in the act of scrambling over a five-barred + gate. Simpson saw the head of the bull coming down upon him like the bows + of a Dutchman upon a fishing-boat, and, paralyzed with terror, could not + move an inch further. Crash against the gate came the horns of Nimrod, + with all the weight and speed of his body behind them. Away went the gate + into the field, and away went Simpson and the bull with it, the latter + nearly breaking his neck, for his horns were entangled in the bars, one of + them by the diagonal bar. Simpson's right leg was jammed betwixt the gate + and the head and horns of the bull. He roared, and his roars maddened + Nimrod, furious already that he could not get his horns clear. Shake and + pull as he might, the gate stuck to them; and Simpson fared little the + better that the bull's quarrel was for the moment with the gate, and not + with the leg between him and it. + </p> + <p> + Clare had not seen the catastrophe, and did not know what had become of + pursuer or pursued, until he reached the gap where the gate had been. He + saw then the odd struggle going on, and ran to the aid of his foe, in + terror of what might already have befallen him. The moment he laid hold of + one of the animal's horns, infuriated as Nimrod was with his helpless + entanglement, he knew at once who it was, and was quiet; for Clare always + took him by the horn when first he went up to him. Without a moment's + demur he yielded to the small hands as they pushed and pulled his head + this way and that until they got it clear of the gate. But then they did + not let him go. Clare proceeded to take him home, and Nimrod made no + objection. Simpson lay groaning. + </p> + <p> + When Clare returned, his enemy was there still. He had got clear of the + gate, but seemed in much pain, for he lay tearing up the grass and sod in + handfuls. When Clare stooped to ask what he should do for him, he struck + him a backhanded blow on the face that knocked him over. Clare got up and + ran. + </p> + <p> + “Coward!” cried Simpson; “to leave a man with a broken leg to get home by + himself!” + </p> + <p> + “I'm going to find some one strong enough to help you,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + But Simpson, after his own evil nature, imagined he was going to let the + bull into the field again, and fell to praying him not to leave him. Clare + knew, however, that, if his leg was broken, he could not get him home, + neither could he get home by himself; so he made haste to tell the people + at the farm, and Simpson lay in terror of the bull till help came. + </p> + <p> + From that hour he hated Clare, attributing to him all the ill he had + brought on himself. But he was out of mischief for a while. The trouble + fell on his mother—who deserved it, for she would believe no ill of + him, because he was <i>hers</i>. One good thing of the affair was, that + the bully was crippled for life, and could do the less harm. + </p> + <p> + It was a great joy to Mr. Person to learn how Clare had defended his + sister. Clergyman as he was, and knowing that Jesus Christ would never + have returned a blow, and that this spirit of the Lord was what saved the + world, he had been uneasy that his adopted child behaved just like Jesus. + That a man should be so made as not to care to return a blow, never + occurred to Mr. Porson as possible. It was therefore an immeasurable + relief to his feelings as an Englishman, to find that the boy was so far + from being destitute of pluck, that in defence of his sister he had + attacked a fellow twice his size. + </p> + <p> + “Weren't you afraid of such a big rascal?” he said. + </p> + <p> + “No, papa,” answered the boy. “Ought I to have been?” + </p> + <p> + He put his hand to his forehead, as if trying to understand. His father + found he had himself something to think about. + </p> + <p> + There was a certain quiescence about Clare, ill to describe, impossible to + explain, but not the less manifest. Like an infant, he never showed + surprise at anything. Whatever came to him he received, questioning + nothing, marvelling at nothing, disputing nothing. What he was told to do + he went to do, never with even a momentary show of disinclination, leaving + book or game with readiness but no eagerness. He would do deftly what was + required of him, and return to his place, with a countenance calm and + sweet as the moon in highest heaven. He seldom offered a caress except to + little Mary; yet would choose, before anything else, a place by his + mother's knee. The moment she, or his father in her absence, entered the + room and sat down, he would rise, take his stool, and set it as near as he + thought he might. When caressed he never turned away, or looked as if he + would rather be let alone; at the same time he received the caress so + quietly, and with so little response, that often, when his heavenly look + had drawn the heart of some mother, or spinster with motherly heart, he + left an ache in the spirit he would have gone to the world's end to + comfort. He never sought love—otherwise than by getting near the + loved. When anything was given him, he would look up and smile, but he + seldom showed much pleasure, or went beyond the regulation thanks. But if + at such a moment little Mary were by, he had a curious way of catching her + up and presenting her to the giver. Whether this was a shape his thanks + took, whether Mary was to him an incorporate gratitude, or whether he + meant to imply that she was the fitter on whom to shower favour, it were + hard to say. His mother observed, and in her mind put the two things + together, that he did not seem to prize much any mere possession. He + looked pleased with a new suit of clothes, but if any one remarked on his + care of them, he would answer, “I mustn't spoil what's papa and mamma's!” + He made no hoard of any kind. He did once hoard marbles till he had about + a hundred; then it was discovered that they were for a certain boy in the + village who was counted half-witted—as indeed was Clare himself by + many. When he learned that the boy had first been accused of stealing them—for + no one would believe that another boy had given them to him—and + after that robbed of them by the other boys, on the ground that he did not + know how to play with them, Clare saw that it was as foolish to hoard for + another as for himself. + </p> + <p> + He was a favourite with few beyond those that knew him well. Many who saw + him only at church, or about the village, did not take to him. His still + regard repelled them. In Naples they would have said he had the evil eye. + I think people had a vague sense of rebuke in his presence. Even his + mother, passionately loving her foundling, was aware of a film between + them through which she could not quite see him, beyond which there was + something she could not get at, Clare knew nothing of such a separation. + He seemed to himself altogether close to his mother, was aware of nothing + between to part them. The cause of the thing was, that Clare was not yet + in flower. His soul was a white half-blown bud, not knowing that it was + but half-blown. It basked in the glory of the warm sun, but only with the + underside of its flower-leaves; it had not opened its heart, the sun-side + of its petals, to the love in which it was immerged. He received the love + as a matter of course, and loved it as a matter of course. But for the + cruel Simpson he would not have known there could be any other way of + things. He did not yet know that one must not only love but mean to love, + must not only bask in the warmth of love, but know it as love, and where + it comes from—love again the fountain whence it flows. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0010" id="link2HCH0010"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter X. The black aunt. + </h2> + <p> + Clare was yet in his tenth year when an unhealthy summer came. The sun was + bright and warm as in other summers, and the flowers in field and garden + appeared as usual when the hour arrived for them to wake and look abroad; + but the children of men did not fare so well as the children of the earth. + A peculiar form of fever showed itself in the village. It was not very + fatal, yet many were so affected as to be long unable to work. There was + consequently much distress beyond the suffering of the fever itself. The + parson and his wife went about from morning to night among the cottagers, + helping everybody that needed help. They had no private fortune, but the + small blanket of the benefice they spread freely over as many as it could + be stretched to cover, depriving themselves of a good part of the food to + which they had been accustomed, and of several degrees of necessary + warmth. When at last the strength of the parson gave way, and the fever + laid hold of him, he had to do without many comforts his wife would gladly + have got for him. They were both of rather humble origin, having but one + relative well-to-do, a sister of Mrs. Porson, who had married a rich but + very common man. From her they could not ask help. She had never sent them + any little present, and had been fiercely indignant with them for adopting + Clare. + </p> + <p> + Neither of them once complained, though Mrs. Person, whose strength was + much spent, could not help weeping sometimes when she was alone and free + to weep. They knew their Lord did not live in luxury, and a secret + gladness nestled in their hearts that they were allowed to suffer a little + with him for the sake of the flock he had given into their charge. + </p> + <p> + The children of course had to share in the general gloom, but it did not + trouble them much. For Clare, he was not easily troubled with anything. + Always ready to help, he did not much realize what suffering was; and he + had Mary to look after, which was labour and pleasure, work and play and + pay all in one. His mother was at ease concerning her child when she knew + her in Clare's charge, and was free to attend to her husband. She often + said that if ever any were paid for being good to themselves, she and her + husband were vastly overpaid for taking such a child from the shuddering + arms of the earthquake. + </p> + <p> + But John Porson's hour was come. He must leave wife and children and + parish, and go to him who had sent him. If any one think it hard he should + so fare in doing his duty, let him be silent till he learn what the parson + himself thought of the matter when he got home. People talk about death as + the gosling might about life before it chips its egg. Take up their way of + lamentation, and we shall find it an endless injustice to have to get up + every morning and go to bed every night. Mrs. Porson wept, but never + thought him or herself ill-used. And had she been low enough to indulge in + self-pity, it would have been thrown away, for before she had time to + wonder how she was to live and rear her children, she too was sent for. In + this world she was not one of those mothers of little faith who trust God + for themselves but not for their children, and when again with her + husband, she would not trust God less. + </p> + <p> + Clare was in the garden when Sarah told him she was dead. He stood still + for a moment, then looked up, up into the blue. Why he looked up, he could + not have told; but ever since that terrible morning of which the vague + burning memory had never passed, when the great dome into which he was + gazing, burst and fell, he had a way every now and then of standing still + and looking up. His face was white. Two slow tears gathered, rolled over, + and dried upon his face. He turned to Mary, lifted her in his arms, and, + carrying her about the garden, once more told her his strange version of + what had happened in his childhood. Then he told her that her papa and + mamma had gone to look for his papa and mamma—“somewhere up in the + dome,” he said. + </p> + <p> + When they wanted to take Mary to see what was left of her mother, the boy + contrived to prevent them. From morning till night he never lost sight of + the child. + </p> + <p> + One cold noon in October, when the clouds were miles deep in front of the + sun, when the rain was falling thick on the yellow leaves, and all the + paths were miry, the two children sat by the kitchen fire. Sarah was + cooking their mid-day meal, which had come from her own pocket. She was + the only servant either of them had known in the house, and she would not + leave it until some one should take charge of them. The neighbours, + dreading infection, did not come near them. Clare sat on a little stool + with Mary on his knees, nestling in his bosom; but he felt dreary, for he + saw no love-firmament over him; the cloud of death hid it. + </p> + <p> + With a sudden jingle and rattle, up drove a rickety post-chaise to the + door of the parsonage. Out of it, and into the kitchen, came stalking a + tall middle-aged woman, in a long black cloak, black bonnet, and black + gloves, with a face at once stern and peevish. + </p> + <p> + “I am the late Mrs. Porson's sister,” she said, and stood. + </p> + <p> + Sarah courtesied and waited. Clare rose, with Mary in his arms. + </p> + <p> + “This is little Maly, ma'am,” he said, offering her the child. + </p> + <p> + “Set her down, and let me see her,” she answered. + </p> + <p> + Clare obeyed. Mary put her finger in her mouth, and began to cry. She did + not like the look of the black aunt, and was not used to a harsh voice. + </p> + <p> + “Tut! tut!” said the black aunt. “Crying already! That will never do! Show + me her things.” + </p> + <p> + Sarah felt stunned. This was worse than death! “If only the mistress had + taken them with her!” she said to herself. + </p> + <p> + Mary's things—they were not many—were soon packed. Within an + hour she was borne off, shrieking, struggling, and calling Clay. The black + aunt, however,—as the black aunt Clare always thought of her—cared + nothing for her resistance; and Clare, who at her first cry was rushing to + the rescue, ready once more to do battle for her, was seized and held back + by Farmer Goodenough. Sarah had sent for him, and he had come—just + in time to frustrate Clare's valour. + </p> + <p> + The carriage was not yet out of sight, when Farmer Goodenough began to + repent that he had come: his presence was an acknowledgment of + responsibility! Something must be done with the foundling! There was + nobody to claim him, and nobody wanted him! He had always liked the boy, + but he did not want him! His wife was not fond of the boy, nor of any boy, + and did not want him! He had said to her that Clare could not be left to + starve, and she had answered, “Why not?”! What was to be done with him? + Nobody knew—any more than Clare himself. But which of us knows what + is going to be done with him? + </p> + <p> + Clare was nobody's business. English farmers no more than French are + proverbial for generosity; and Farmer Goodenough, no bad type of his + class, had a wife in whose thoughts not the pence but the farthings + dominated. She was one who at once recoiled and repelled—one of + those whose skin shrinks from the skin of their kind, and who are + specially apt to take unaccountable dislikes—a pitiable human animal + of the leprous sort. She “never took to the foundling,” she said. To have + neither father nor mother, she counted disreputable. But I believe the + main source of her dislike to Clare was a feeling of undefined reproof in + the very atmosphere of the boy's presence, his nature was so different + from hers. What urged him toward his fellow-creatures, made her draw back + from him. In truth she hated the boy. The very look of him made her sick, + she said. It was only a certain respect for the parson, and a certain fear + of her husband, who, seldom angry, was yet capable of fury, that had + prevented her from driving the child, “with his dish-clout face,” off the + premises, whenever she saw him from door or window. It was no wonder the + farmer should he at his wits' end to know what, as churchwarden, guardian + of the poor, and friend of the late vicar—as friendly also to the + boy himself, he was bound to do. + </p> + <p> + “Where are <i>you</i> going?” he asked Sarah. + </p> + <p> + “Where the Lord wills,” answered the old woman. Her ark had gone to + pieces, and she hardly cared what became of her. + </p> + <p> + “We've got to look to ourselves!” said the farmer. + </p> + <p> + “Parson used to say there was One as took that off our hands!” replied + Sarah. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, yes,” assented Mr. Goodenough, fidgeting a little; “but the Almighty + helps them as helps themselves, and that's sound doctrine. You really must + do something, Sarah! We can't have you on the parish, you know!” + </p> + <p> + “I beg your pardon, sir, but until the child here is provided for, or + until they turn us out of the parsonage, I will not leave the place.” + </p> + <p> + “The furniture is advertised for sale. You'll have nothing but the bare + walls!” + </p> + <p> + “We'll manage to keep each other warm!—Shan't we, Clare?” + </p> + <p> + “I will try to keep you warm, Sarah,” responded the boy sadly. + </p> + <p> + “But the new parson will soon be here. Our souls must be cared for!” + </p> + <p> + “Is the Lord's child that came from heaven in an earthquake to be turned + out into the cold for fear the souls of big men should perish?” + </p> + <p> + “Something must be done about it!” said the farmer. + </p> + <p> + “What it's to be I can't tell! It's no business o' mine any way!” + </p> + <p> + “That's what the priest, and the Levite, and the farmer says!” returned + Sarah. + </p> + <p> + “Won't you ask Mr. Goodenough to stay to dinner?” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + He went up to the farmer, who in his perplexity had seated himself, and + laid his arm on his shoulder. + </p> + <p> + “No, I can't,” answered Sarah. “He would eat all we have, and not have + enough!” + </p> + <p> + “Now Maly is gone,” returned Clare, “I would rather not have any dinner.” + </p> + <p> + The farmer's old feeling for the boy, which the dread of having him left + on his hands had for the time dulled, came back. + </p> + <p> + “Get him his dinner, Sarah,” he said. “I've something to see to in the + village. By the time I come back, he'll be ready to go with me, perhaps.” + </p> + <p> + “God bless you, sir!” cried Sarah. “You meant it all the time, an' I been + behavin' like a brute!” + </p> + <p> + The farmer did not like being taken up so sharply. He had promised + nothing! But he had nearly made up his mind that, as the friend of the + late parson, he could scarcely do less than give shelter to the child + until he found another refuge. True, he was not the parson's child, but he + had loved him as his own! He would make the boy useful, and so shut his + wife's mouth! There were many things Clare could do about the place! + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0011" id="link2HCH0011"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XI. Clare on the farm. + </h2> + <p> + When Mr. Goodenough appeared at the house-door with the boy, his wife's + face expressed what her tongue dared not utter without some heating of the + furnace behind it. But Clare never saw that he was unwelcome. He had not + begun to note outward and visible signs in regard to his own species; his + observation was confined to the animals, to whose every motion and look he + gave heed. But he was hardly aware of watching even them: his love made it + so natural to watch, and so easy to understand them! He was not drawn to + study Mrs. Goodenough, or to read her indications; he was content to hear + what she said. + </p> + <p> + True to her nature, Mrs. Goodenough, seeing she could not at once get rid + of the boy, did her endeavour to make him pay for his keep. Nominally he + continued to attend the village school, where the old master was doing his + best for him; but, oftener than not, she interposed to prevent his going, + and turned him to use about the house, the dairy, and the poultry-yard. + </p> + <p> + His new mode of life occasioned him no sense of hardship. I do not mean + because of his patient acceptance of everything that came; but because he + had been so long accustomed to the ways of a farm, to all the phases of + life and work in yard and field, that nothing there came strange to him—except + having to stick to what he was put to, and having next to no time to read. + Many boys who have found much amusement in doing this or that, find it + irksome the moment it is required of them: Clare was not of that mean + sort; he was a gentleman. Happily he was put to no work beyond his + strength. + </p> + <p> + At first, and for some time, he had to do only with the creatures more + immediately under the care of “the mistress,” whence his acquaintance with + the poultry and the pigs, the pigeons and the calves—and specially + with such as were delicate or had been hurt—with their ways of + thinking and their carriage and conduct, rapidly increased. + </p> + <p> + By and by, however, having already almost ceased to attend school, the + farmer, requiring some passing help a boy could give, took him from his + wife—not without complaint on her part, neither without sense of + relief, and would not part with him again. He was so quick in doing what + was required, so intelligent to catch the meaning not always thoroughly + expressed, so cheerful, and so willing, that he was a pleasure to Mr. + Goodenough—and no less a pleasure to the farmer that dwelt in Mr. + Goodenough, and seemed to most men all there was of him; for, instead of + an expense, he found him a saving. + </p> + <p> + It was much more pleasant for Clare to be with his master than with his + mistress, but he fared the worse for it in the house. The woman's dislike + of the boy must find outlet; and as, instead of flowing all day long, it + was now pent up the greater part of it, the stronger it issued when he + came home to his meals. I will not defile my page with a record of the + modes in which she vented her spite. It sought at times such minuteness of + indulgence, that it was next to impossible for any one to perceive its + embodiments except the boy himself. + </p> + <p> + He now came more into contact with the larger animals about the place; and + the comfort he derived from them was greater than most people would + readily or perhaps willingly believe. He had kept up his relations with + Nimrod, the bull, and there was never a breach of the friendship between + them. The people about the farm not unfrequently sought his influence with + the animal, for at times they dared hardly approach him. Clare even made + him useful—got a little work out of him now and then. But his main + interest lay in the horses. He had up to this time known rather less of + them than of the other creatures on the place; now he had to give his + chief attention to them, laying in love the foundation of that knowledge + which afterward stood him in such stead when he came to dwell for a time + among certain eastern tribes whose horses are their chief gladness and + care. He used, when alone with them, to talk to this one or that about the + friends he had lost—his father and mother and Maly and Sarah—and + did not mind if they all listened. He would even tell them sometimes about + his own father and mother—how the whole sky full of angels fell down + upon them and took them away. But he said most about his sister. For her + he mourned more than for any of the rest. Her screams as the black aunt + carried her away, would sometimes come back to him with such + verisimilitude of nearness, that, forgetting everything about him, he + would start to run to her. He felt somehow that it was well with the + others, but Maly had always needed <i>him</i>, and more than ever in the + last days of their companionship. He wept for nobody but Maly. In the + night he would wake up suddenly, thinking he heard her crying out for him. + Then he would get out of bed, creep to the stable, go to Jonathan, and to + him pour out his low-voiced complaint. Jonathan was the biggest and oldest + horse on the farm. + </p> + <p> + How much he thought they understood of what he told them, I cannot say. He + was never silly; and where we cannot be sure, we may yet have reason to + hope. He believed they knew when he was in trouble, and sympathized with + him, and would gladly have relieved him of his pain. I suspect most + animals know something of the significance of tears. More animals shed + tears themselves than people think. + </p> + <p> + For dogs, bless them, they are everywhere, and the boy had known them from + time immemorial. + </p> + <p> + In the village, some of Clare's old admirers began to remark that he no + longer “looked the little gentleman.” This was caused chiefly by the state + of his clothes. They were not fit for the work to which he was put, and + within a few weeks were very shabby. Besides, he was growing rapidly, so + that he and his garments were in too evident process of parting company. + Accustomed to a mother's attentions, he had never thought of his clothes + except to take care of them for her sake; now he tried to mend them, but + soon found his labour of little use. He had no wages to buy anything with. + His clothes or his health or his education were nothing to Mrs. + Goodenough. It was no concern of hers whether he looked decent or not. + What right had such as he to look decent? It was more than enough that she + fed him! The shabbiness of the beggarly creature was a consolation to her. + </p> + <p> + But Clare's toil in the open air, and his constant and willing association + with the animals, had begun to give him a bucolic appearance. He grew a + trifle browner, and showed here and there a freckle. His health was + splendid. Nothing seemed to hurt him. Hardship was wholesome to him. To + the eyes that hated him, and grudged the hire of the mere food by which he + grew, he seemed every day to enlarge visibly. Already he gave promise of + becoming a man of more than ordinary strength and vigour. Possibly the + animals gave him something. + </p> + <p> + What may have been his outlook and hope all this time, who shall tell! He + never grumbled, never showed sign of pain or unwillingness, gave his + mistress no reason for fault-finding. She found it hard even to discover a + pretext. She seemed always ready to strike him, but was probably afraid to + do so without provocation her husband would count sufficient. Clare never + showed discomfort, never even sighed except he were alone. Chequered as + his life had been, if ever he looked forward to a fresh change, it was but + as a far possibility in the slow current of events. But he was constantly + possessed with a large dim sense of something that lay beyond, waiting for + him; something toward which the tide of things was with certainty drifting + him, but with which he had nothing more to do than wait. He did not see + that to do the things given him to do was the only preparation for + whatever, in the dim under-world of the future, might be preparing for + him; but he did feel that he must do his work. He did not then think much + about duty. He was actively inclined, had a strong feeling for doing a + thing as it ought to be done; and was thoroughly loyal to any one that + seemed to have a right over him. In this blind, enduring, vaguely hopeful + way, he went on—sustained, and none the less certainly that he did + not know it, from the fountain of his life. When the winter came, his + sufferings, cared for as he had been, and accustomed to warmth and + softness, must at times have been considerable. In the day his work was a + protection, but at night the house was cold. He had, however, plenty to + eat, had no ailment, and was not to be greatly pitied. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0012" id="link2HCH0012"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XII. Clare becomes a guardian of the poor. + </h2> + <p> + Simpson, the bully of Clare's childhood, went limping about on a crutch, + permanently lame, and full of hatred toward the innocent occasion of the + injury he had brought upon himself. Ever since his recovery, he had, + loitering about in idleness, watched the boy, to waylay and catch him at + unawares. Not until Clare went to the farm, however, did he once succeed; + for it was not difficult to escape him, so long as he had not laid actual + hold on his prey. But he grew more and more cunning, and contrived at + last, by creeping along hedges and lying in ambush like a snake, to get + his hands upon him. Then the poor boy fared ill. + </p> + <p> + He went home bleeding and torn. The righteous churchwarden rebuked him + with severity for fighting. His mistress told him she was glad he had met + with some one to give him what he deserved, for she could hardly keep her + hands off him. He stared at her with wondering eyes, but said nothing. She + turned from them: the devil in her could not look in the eyes of the angel + in him. The next time he fell into the snare of his enemy, he managed to + conceal what had befallen him. After that he was too wide awake to be + caught. + </p> + <p> + There was in the village a child whom nobody heeded. He was far more + destitute than Clare, but had too much liberty. He lived with a wretched + old woman who called him her grandson: whether he was or not nobody cared. + She made her livelihood by letting beds, in a cottage or rather hovel + which seemed to be her own, to wayfarers, mostly tramps, with or without + trades. The child was thus thrown into the worst of company, and learned + many sorts of wickedness. He was already a thief, and of no small + proficiency in his art. Though village-bred, he could pick a pocket more + sensitive than a clown's. Small and deft, he had never stood before a + magistrate. He was a miserable creature, bare-footed and bare-legged; + about eight years of age, but so stunted that to the first glance he + looked less than six—with keen ferret eyes in red rims, red hair, + pasty, freckled complexion, and a generally unhealthy look; from which + marks all, Clare conceived a pitiful sympathy for him. Their acquaintance + began thus:— + </p> + <p> + One day, during his father's last illness, he happened to pass the door of + the grandmother's hovel while the crone was administering to Tommy a + severe punishment with a piece of thick rope: she had been sharp enough to + catch him stealing from herself. Clare heard his cries. The door being + partly open, he ran in, and gave him such assistance that they managed to + bolt together from the hut. A friendship, for long almost a silent one, + was thus initiated between them. Tommy—Clare never knew his other + name, nor did the boy himself—would off and on watch for a sight of + him all day long, but had the instinct, or experience, never to approach + him if any one was with him. He was careful not to compromise him. The + instant the most momentary <i>tête-à-tête</i> was possible, he would rush + up, offer him something he had found or stolen, and hurry away again. That + he was a thief Clare had not the remotest suspicion. He had never offered + him anything to suggest theft. + </p> + <p> + By and by it came to the knowledge of Clare's enemy that there was a + friendship between them, and the discovery wrought direness for both. One + day Simpson saw Clare coming, and Tommy watching him. He laid hold of + Tommy, and began cuffing him and pulling his hair, to make him scream, + thinking thus to get hold of Clare. But notwithstanding the lesson he had + received, the rascal had not yet any adequate notion of the boy's capacity + for action where another was concerned. He flew to the rescue, caught up + the crutch Simpson had dropped, and laid it across his back with vigour. + The fellow let Tommy go and turned on Clare, who went backward, + brandishing the crutch. + </p> + <p> + “Run, Tommy,” he cried. + </p> + <p> + Tommy retreated a few steps. + </p> + <p> + “Run yourself,” he counselled, having reached a safe distance. “Take his + third leg with you.” + </p> + <p> + Clare saw the advice was good, and ran. But the next moment reflection + showed him the helplessness of his enemy. He turned, and saw him hobbling + after him in such evident pain and discomfiture, that he went to meet him, + and politely gave him his crutch. He might have thrown it to him and gone + on, but he had a horror of rudeness, and handed it to him with a bow. Just + as he regained his perpendicular, the crutch descended on his head, and + laid him flat on the ground. There the tyrant belaboured him. Tommy stood + and regarded the proceeding. + </p> + <p> + “The cove's older an' bigger an' pluckier than me,” he said to himself; + “but he's an ass. He'll come to grief unless he's looked after. He'll be + hanged else. He don't know how to dodge. I'll have to take him in charge!” + </p> + <p> + When he saw Clare free, an event to which he had contributed nothing, he + turned and ran home. + </p> + <p> + Simpson redoubled now his persecution of Clare, and persecuted Tommy + because of Clare. He lurked for Tommy now, and when he caught him, + tormented him with choice tortures. In a word, he made his life miserable. + After every such mischance Tommy would hurry to the farm, and lie about in + the hope of a sight of Clare, or possibly a chance of speaking to him. His + repute was so bad that he dared not show himself. + </p> + <p> + Hot tears would come into Clare's eyes as he listened to the not always + unembellished tale of Tommy's sufferings at the hands of Simpson; but he + never thought of revenge, only of protection or escape for the boy. It + comforted him to believe that he was growing, and would soon be a match + for the oppressor. + </p> + <p> + Whether at this time he felt any great interest in life, or recognized any + personal advantage in growing, I doubt. But he had the friendship of the + animals; and it is not surprising that creatures their maker thinks worth + making and keeping alive, should yield consolation to one that understands + them, or even fill with a mild joy the pauses of labour in an irksome + life. + </p> + <p> + Then each new day was an old friend to the boy. Each time the sun rose, + new hope rose with him in his heart. He came every morning fresh from + home, with a fresh promise. The boy read the promise in his great shining, + and believed it; gazed and rejoiced, and turned to his work. + </p> + <p> + But the hour arrived when his mistress could bear his presence no longer. + Some petty loss, I imagine, had befallen her. Nothing touched her like the + loss of money—the love of which is as dread a passion as the love of + drink, and more ruinous to the finer elements of the nature. It was like + the tearing out of her heart to Mrs. Goodenough to lose a shilling. Her + self-command forsook her, perhaps, in some such moment of vexation; + anyhow, she opened the sluices of her hate, and overwhelmed him with it in + the presence of her husband. + </p> + <p> + The farmer knew she was unfair, knew the orphan a good boy and a diligent, + knew there was nothing against him but the antipathy of his wife. But, + annoyed with her injustice, he was powerless to change her heart. Since + the boy came to live with them, he had had no pleasure in his wife's + society. She had always been moody and dissatisfied, but since then had + been unbearable. Constantly irritated with and by her because of Clare, he + had begun to regard him as the destroyer of his peace, and to feel a + grudge against him. He sat smouldering with bodiless rage, and said + nothing. + </p> + <p> + Clare too was silent,—for what could he say? Where is the wisdom + that can answer hatred? He carried to his friend Jonathan a heart heavy + and perplexed. + </p> + <p> + “Why does she hate me so, Jonathan?” he murmured. + </p> + <p> + The big horse kissed his head all over, but made him no other answer. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0013" id="link2HCH0013"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XIII. Clare the vagabond. + </h2> + <p> + The next morning Clare happened to do something not altogether to the + farmer's mind. It was a matter of no consequence—only cleaning that + side of one of the cow-houses first which was usually cleaned last. He + gave him a box on the ear that made him stagger, and then stand + bewildered. + </p> + <p> + “What do you mean by staring that way?” cried the farmer, annoyed with + himself and seeking justification in his own eyes. “Am I not to box your + ears when I choose?” And with that he gave him another blow. + </p> + <p> + Then first it dawned on Clare that he was not wanted, that he was no good + to anybody. He threw down his scraper, and ran from the cow-house; ran + straight from the farm to the lane, and from the lane to the high road. + Buffets from the hand of his only friend, and the sudden sense of + loneliness they caused, for the moment bereft Clare of purpose. It was as + if his legs had run away with him, and he had unconsciously submitted to + their abduction. + </p> + <p> + At the mouth of the lane, where it opened on the high road, he ran against + Tommy turning the corner, eager to find him. The eyes of the small human + monkey were swollen with weeping; his nose was bleeding, and in size and + shape scarce recognizable as a nose. At the sight, the consciousness of + his protectorate awoke in Clare, and he stopped, unable to speak, but not + unable to listen. Tommy blubbered out a confused, half-inarticulate + something about “granny and the other devil,” who between them had all but + killed him. + </p> + <p> + “What can I do?” said Clare, his heart sinking with the sense of having no + help in him. + </p> + <p> + Tommy was ready to answer the question. He had been hatching vengeance all + the way. Eagerly came his proposition—that they should, in their + turn, lie in ambush for Simpson, and knock his crutch from under him. That + done, Clare should belabour him with it, while he ran like the wind and + set his grandmother's house on fire. + </p> + <p> + “She'll be drunk in bed, an' she'll be burned to death!” cried Tommy. + “Then we'll mizzle!” + </p> + <p> + “But it would hurt them both very badly, Tommy!” said Clare, as if + unfolding the reality of the thing to a foolish child. + </p> + <p> + “Well! all right! the worse the better! 'Ain't they hurt us?” rejoined + Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “That's how we know it's not nice!” answered Clare. “If they set it a + going, we ain't to keep it a going!” + </p> + <p> + “Then they'll be at it for ever,” cried Tommy, “an' I'm sick of it! I'll + <i>kill</i> granny! I swear I will, if I'm hanged for it! She's said a + hundred times she'd pull my legs when I was hanged; but <i>she</i> won't + be at the hanging!” + </p> + <p> + “Why shouldn't you run for it first?” said Clare. “Then they wouldn't want + to hang you!” + </p> + <p> + “Then I shouldn't have nobody!” replied Tommy, whimpering. + </p> + <p> + “I should have thought Nobody was as good as granny!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “A big bilin' better!” answered Tommy bitterly. “I wasn't meanin' granny—nor + yet stumpin' Simpson.” + </p> + <p> + “I don't know what you're driving at,” said Clare. Tommy burst into tears. + </p> + <p> + “Ain't you the only one I got, up or down?” he cried. + </p> + <p> + Tommy had a little bit of heart—not much, but enough to have a + chance of growing. If ever creature had less than that, he was not human. + I do not think he could even be an ape. + </p> + <p> + Some of the people about the parson used to think Clare had no heart, and + Mrs. Goodenough was sure of it. He had not a spark of gratitude, she said. + But the cause of this opinion was that Clare's affection took the shape of + deeds far more than of words. Never were judges of their neighbours more + mistaken. The chief difference between Clare's history and that of most + others was, that his began at the unusual end. Clare began with loving + everybody; and most people take a long time to grow to that. Hence, those + whom, from being brought nearest to them, he loved specially, he loved + without that outbreak of show which is often found in persons who love but + a few, and whose love is defiled with partisanship. He loved quietly and + constantly, in a fashion as active as undemonstrative. He was always glad + to be near those he specially loved; beyond that, the signs of his love + were practical—it came out in ministration, in doing things for + them. There are those who, without loving, desire to be loved, because + they love themselves; for those that are worth least are most precious to + themselves. But Clare never thought of the love of others to him—from + no heartlessness, but that he did not think about himself—had never + done so, at least, until the moment when he fled from the farm with the + new agony in his heart that nobody wanted him, that everybody would be + happier without him. Happy is he that does not think of himself before the + hour when he becomes conscious of the bliss of being loved. For it must be + and ought to be a happy moment when one learns that another human creature + loves him; and not to be grateful for love is to be deeply selfish. Clare + had always loved, but had not thought of any one as loving him, or of + himself as being loved by any one. + </p> + <p> + “Well,” rejoined Clare, struggling with his misery, “ain't I going + myself?” + </p> + <p> + “You going!—That's chaff!” + </p> + <p> + “'Tain't chaff. I'm on my way.” + </p> + <p> + “What! Going to hook it? Oh golly! what a lark! Won't Farmer Goodenough + look blue!” + </p> + <p> + “He'll think himself well rid of me,” returned Clare with a sigh. “But + there's no time to talk. If you're going, Tommy, come along.” + </p> + <p> + He turned to go. + </p> + <p> + “Where to?” asked Tommy, following. + </p> + <p> + “I don't know. Anywhere away,” answered Clare, quickening his pace. + </p> + <p> + In spite of his swollen visage, Tommy's eyes grew wider. + </p> + <p> + “You 'ain't cribbed nothing?” he said. + </p> + <p> + “I don't know what you mean.” + </p> + <p> + “You 'ain't stole something?” interpreted Tommy. + </p> + <p> + Clare stopped, and for the first time on his own part, lifted his hand to + strike. It dropped immediately by his side. + </p> + <p> + “No, you poor Tommy,” he said. “I don't steal.” + </p> + <p> + “Thought you didn't! What are you running away for then?” + </p> + <p> + “Because they don't want me.” + </p> + <p> + “Lord! what will you do?” + </p> + <p> + “Work.” + </p> + <p> + Tommy held his tongue: he knew a better way than that! If work was the + only road to eating, things would go badly with <i>him</i>! But he thought + he knew a thing or two, and would take his chance! There were degrees of + hunger that were not so bad as the thrashings he got, for in his granny's + hands the rope might fall where it would; while all cripple Simpson cared + for was to make him squeal satisfactorily. But work was worse than all! He + would go with Clare, but not to work! Not he! + </p> + <p> + Clare kept on in silence, never turning his head—out into the + untried, unknown, mysterious world, which lay around the one spot he knew + as the darkness lies about the flame of the candle. They walked more than + a mile before either spoke. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0014" id="link2HCH0014"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XIV. Their first helper + </h2> + <p> + It was a lovely spring morning. The sun was about thirty degrees above the + horizon, shining with a liquid radiance, as if he had already drawn up and + was shining through the dew of the morning, though it lay yet on all the + grasses by the roadside, turning them into gem-plants. Every sort of gem + sparkled on their feathery or beady tops, and their long slender blades. + At the first cottages they passed, the women were beginning their day's + work, sweeping clean their floors and door-steps. Clare noted that where + were most flowers in the garden, the windows were brightest, and the + children cleanest. + </p> + <p> + “The flowers come where they make things nice for them!” he said to + himself. “Where the flowers see dirt, they turn away, and won't come out.” + </p> + <p> + From childhood he had had the notion that the flowers crept up inside the + stalks until they found a window to look out at. Where the prospect was + not to their mind they crept down, and away by some door in the root to + try again. For all the stalks stood like watch-towers, ready for them to + go up and peep out. + </p> + <p> + They came to a pond by a farm-house. Clare had been observing with pity + how wretched Tommy's clothes were; but when he looked into the pond he saw + that his own shabbiness was worse than Tommy's downright miserableness. + Nobody would leave either of them within reach of anything worth stealing! + What he wore had been his Sunday suit, and it was not even worth brushing! + </p> + <p> + “I'm 'orrid 'ungry,” said Tommy. “I 'ain't swallered a plug this mornin', + 'xcep' a lump o' bread out o' granny's cupboard. That's what I got my + weltin' for. It were a whole half-loaf, though—an' none so dry!” + </p> + <p> + Clare had eaten nothing, and had been up since five o'clock—at work + all the time till the farmer struck him: he was quite as hungry as Tommy. + What was to be done? Besides a pocket-handkerchief he had but one thing + alienable. + </p> + <p> + The very day she was taken ill, he had been in the store-room with his + mother, and she, knowing the pleasure he took in the scent of brown + Windsor-soap, had made him a present of a small cake. This he had kept in + his pocket ever since, wrapt in a piece of rose-coloured paper, his one + cherished possession: hunger deadening sorrow, the time was come to bid it + farewell. His heart ached to part with it, but Tommy and he were so + hungry! + </p> + <p> + They went to the door of the house, and knocked—first Clare very + gently, then Tommy with determination. It was opened by a matron who + looked at them over the horizon of her chin. + </p> + <p> + “Please, ma'am,” said Clare, “will you give us a piece of bread?—as + large a piece, please, as you can spare; and I will give you this piece of + brown Windsor-soap.” + </p> + <p> + As he ended his speech, he took a farewell whiff of his favourite + detergent. + </p> + <p> + “Soap!” retorted the dame. “Who wants your soap! Where did you get it? + Stole it, I don't doubt! Show it here.” + </p> + <p> + She took it in her hand, and held it to her nose. + </p> + <p> + “Who gave it you?” + </p> + <p> + “My mother,” answered Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Where's your mother?” + </p> + <p> + Clare pointed upward. + </p> + <p> + “Eh? Oh—hanged! I thought, so!” + </p> + <p> + She threw the soap into the yard, and closed the door. Clare darted after + his property, pounced upon it, and restored it lovingly to his pocket. + </p> + <p> + As they were leaving the yard disconsolate, they saw a cart full of + turnips. Tommy turned and made for it. + </p> + <p> + “Don't, Tommy,” cried Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Why not? I'm hungry,” answered Tommy, “an' you see it's no use astin'!” + </p> + <p> + He flew at the cart, but Clare caught and held him. + </p> + <p> + “They ain't ours, Tommy,” he said. + </p> + <p> + “Then why don't you take one?” retorted Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “That's why you shouldn't.” + </p> + <p> + “It's why you should, for then it 'ud be yours.” + </p> + <p> + “To take it wouldn't make it ours, Tommy.” + </p> + <p> + “Wouldn't it, though? I believe when I'd eaten it, it would be mine—rather!” + </p> + <p> + “No, it wouldn't. Think of having in your stomach what wasn't yours! No, + you must pay for it. Perhaps they would take my soap for a turnip. I + believe it's worth two turnips.” + </p> + <p> + He spied a man under a shed, ran to him, and made offer of the soap for a + turnip apiece. + </p> + <p> + “I don't want your soap,” answered the man, “an' I don't recommend cold + turmits of a mornin'. But take one if you like, and clear out. The + master's cart-whip 'ill be about your ears the moment he sees you!” + </p> + <p> + “Ain't you the master, sir?” + </p> + <p> + “No, I ain't.” + </p> + <p> + “Then the turnips ain't yours?” said Clare, looking at him with hungry, + regretful eyes, for he could have eaten a raw potato. + </p> + <p> + “You're a deal too impudent to be hungry!” said the man, making a blow at + him with his open hand, which Clare dodged. “Be off with you, or I'll set + the dog on you.” + </p> + <p> + “I'm very sorry,” said Clare. “I did not mean to offend you.” + </p> + <p> + “Clear out, I say. Double trot!” + </p> + <p> + Hungry as the boys were, they must trudge! No bread, no turnip for them! + Nothing but trudge, trudge till they dropped! + </p> + <p> + When they had gone about five miles further, they sat down, as if by + common consent, on the roadside; and Tommy, used to crying, began to cry. + Clare did not seek to stop him, for some instinct told him it must be a + relief. + </p> + <p> + By and by a working-man came along the road. Clare hesitated, but Tommy's + crying urged him. He rose and stood ready to accost him. As soon as he + came up, however, the man stopped of himself. He questioned Clare and + listened to his story, then counselled the boys to go back. + </p> + <p> + “I'm not wanted, sir,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “They'd kill <i>me</i>,” said Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “God help you, boys!” returned the man. “You may be telling me lies, and + you may be telling me the truth!—A liar may be hungry, but somehow I + grudge my dinner to a liar!” + </p> + <p> + As he spoke he untied the knots of a blue handkerchief with white spots, + gave them its contents of bread and cheese, wiped his face with it, and + put it in his pocket; lifted his bag of tools, and went his way. He had + lost his dinner and saved his life! + </p> + <p> + The dinner, being a man's, went a good way toward satisfying them, though + empty corners would not have been far to seek, had there been anything to + put in them. As it was, they started again refreshed and hopeful. What had + come to them once might reasonably come again! + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0015" id="link2HCH0015"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XV. Their first host. + </h2> + <p> + As the evening drew on, and began to settle down into night, a new care + arose in the mind of the elder boy. Where were they to pass the darkness?—how + find shelter for sleep? It was a question that gave Tommy no anxiety. He + had been on the tramp often, now with one party, now with another of his + granny's lodgers, and had frequently slept in the open air, or under the + rudest covert. Tommy had not much imagination to trouble him, and in his + present moral condition was possibly better without it; but to + inexperienced Clare there was something fearful in having the night come + so close to him. Sleep out of doors he had never thought of. To lie down + with the stars looking at him, nothing but the blue wind between him and + them, was like being naked to the very soul. Doubtless there would be + creatures about, to share the night with him, and protect him from its + awful bareness; but they would be few for the size of the room, and he + might see none of them! It was the sense of emptiness, the lack of present + life that dismayed him. He had never seen any creatures to shrink from. He + disliked no one of the things that creep or walk or fly. Before long he + did come to know and dislike at least one sort; and the sea held creatures + that in after years made him shudder; but as yet, not even rats, so + terrible to many, were a terror to Clare. It was Nothing that he feared. + </p> + <p> + My reader may say, “But had no one taught him about God?” Yes, he had + heard about God, and about Jesus Christ; had heard a great deal about + them. But they always seemed persons a long way off. He knew, or thought + he knew, that God was everywhere, but he had never felt his presence a + reality. He seemed in no place where Clare's eyes ever fell. He never + thought, “God is here.” Perhaps the sparrows knew more about God than he + did then. When he looked out into the night it always seemed vacant, + therefore horrid, and he took it for as empty as it looked. And if there + had been no God there, it would have been reasonable indeed to be afraid; + for the most frightful of notions is <i>Nothing-at-all</i>. + </p> + <p> + It grew dark, and they were falling asleep on their walking legs, when + they came to a barn-yard. Very glad were they to creep into it, and search + for the warmest place. It was a quiet part of the country, and for years + nothing had been stolen from anybody, so that the people were not so + watchful as in many places. + </p> + <p> + They went prowling about, but even Tommy with innocent intent, eager only + after a little warmth, and as much sleep as they could find, and came at + length to an open window, through which they crawled into what, by the + smell and the noises, they knew to be a stable. It was very dark, but + Clare was at home, and felt his way about; while Tommy, who was afraid of + the horses, held close to him. Clare's hand fell upon the hind-quarters of + a large well-fed horse. The huge animal was asleep standing, but at the + touch of the small hand he gave a low whinny. Tommy shuddered at the + sound. + </p> + <p> + “He's pleased,” said Clare, and crept up on his near side into the stall. + There he had soon made such friends with him, that he did not hesitate to + get in among the hay the horse had for his supper. + </p> + <p> + “Here, Tommy!” he cried in a whisper; “there's room for us both in the + manger.” + </p> + <p> + But Tommy stood shaking. He fancied the darkness full of horses' heads, + and would not stir. Clare had to get out again, and search for a place to + suit his fancy, which he found in an untenanted loose-box, with remains of + litter. There Tommy coiled himself up, and was soon fast asleep. + </p> + <p> + Clare returned to the hospitality of the big horse. The great nostrils + snuffed him over and over as he lay, and the boy knew the horse made him + welcome. He dropped asleep stroking the muzzle of his chamber-fellow, and + slept all the night, kept warm by the horse's breath, and the near furnace + of his great body. + </p> + <p> + In the morning the boys found they had slept too long, for they were + discovered. But though they were promptly ejected as vagabonds, and not + without a few kicks and cuffs, these were not administered without the + restraint of some mercy, for their appearance tended to move pity rather + than indignation. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0016" id="link2HCH0016"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XVI. On the tramp. + </h2> + <p> + With the new day came the fresh necessity for breakfast, and the fresh + interest in the discovery of it. But breakfast is a thing not always + easiest to find where breakfasts most abound; nor was theirs when found + that morning altogether of a sort to be envied, ill as they could afford + to despise it. Passing, on their goal-less way, a flour-mill, the door of + which was half-open, they caught sight of a heap, whether floury dust or + dusty flour, it would have been hard to say, that seemed waiting only for + them to help themselves from it. Fain to still the craving of birds too + early for any worm, they swallowed a considerable portion of it, choking + as it was, nor met with rebuke. There was good food in it, and they might + have fared worse. + </p> + <p> + Another day's tramp was thus inaugurated. How it was to end no one in the + world knew less than the trampers. + </p> + <p> + Before it was over, a considerable change had passed upon Clare; for a new + era was begun in his history, and he started to grow more rapidly. + Hitherto, while with his father or mother, or with his little sister, + making life happy to her; even while at the farm, doing hard work, he had + lived with much the same feeling with which he read a story: he was in the + story, half dreaming, half acting it. The difference between a thing that + passed through his brain from the pages of a book, or arose in it as he + lay in bed either awake or asleep, and the thing in which he shared the + life and motion of the day, was not much marked in his consciousness. He + was a dreamer with open eyes and ready hands, not clearly distinguishing + thought and action, fancy and fact. Even the cold and hunger he had felt + at the farm had not sufficed to wake him up; he had only had to wait and + they were removed. But now that he did not know whence his hunger was to + be satisfied, or where shelter was to be had; now also that there was a + hunger outside him, and a cold that was not his, which yet he had to + supply and to frustrate in the person of Tommy, life began to grow real to + him; and, which was far more, he began to grow real to himself, as a power + whose part it was to encounter the necessities thus presented. He began to + understand that things were required of him. He had met some of these + requirements before, and had satisfied them, but without knowing them as + requirements. He did it half awake, not as a thinking and willing source + of the motion demanded. He did it all by impulse, hardly by response. Now + we are put into bodies, and sent into the world, to wake us up. We might + go on dreaming for ages if we were left without bodies that the wind could + blow upon, that the rain could wet, and the sun scorch, bodies to feel + thirst and cold and hunger and wounds and weariness. The eternal plan was + beginning to tell upon Clare. He was in process of being changed from a + dreamer to a man. It is a good thing to be a dreamer, but it is a bad + thing indeed to be <i>only</i> a dreamer. He began to see that everybody + in the world had to do something in order to get food; that he had worked + for the farmer and his wife, and they had fed him. He had worked willingly + and eaten gladly, but had not before put the two together. He saw now that + men who would be men must work. + </p> + <p> + His eyes fell upon a congregation of rooks in a field by the roadside. + “Are <i>they</i> working?” he thought; “or are they stealing? If it be + stealing they are at, it looks like hard work as well. It can't be + stealing though; they were made to live, and <i>how</i> are they to live + if they don't grub? that's their work! Still the corn ain't theirs! + Perhaps it's only worms they take! Are the worms theirs? A man should die + rather than steal, papa said. But, if they are stealing, the crows don't + know it; and if they don't know it, they ain't thieves! Is that it?” + </p> + <p> + The same instant came the report of a gun. A crowd of rooks rose cawing. + One of them dropped and lay. + </p> + <p> + “He must have been stealing,” thought Clare, “for see what comes of it! + Would they shoot me if I stole? Better be shot than die of hunger! Yes, + but better die of hunger than be a thief!” + </p> + <p> + He had read stories about thieves and honest boys, and had never seen any + difficulty in the matter. Nor had he yet a notion of how difficult it is + not to be a thief—that is, to be downright honest. If anybody thinks + it easy, either he has not known much of life, or he has never tried to be + honest; he has done just like other people. Clare did not know that many a + boy whose heart sided with the honest boy in the story, has grown up a + dishonourable man—a man ready to benefit himself to the disadvantage + of others; that many a man who passes for respectable in this disreputable + world, is counted far meaner than a thief in the next, and is going there + to be put in prison. But he began to see that it is not enough to mean + well; that he must be sharp, and mind what he was about; else, with hunger + worrying inside him, he might be a thief before he knew. He was on the way + to discover that to think rightly—to be on the side of what is + honourable when reading a story, is a very different thing from doing + right, and being honourable, when the temptation is upon us. Many a boy + when he reads this will say, “Of course it is!” and when the time comes, + will be a sneak. + </p> + <p> + Those crows set Clare thinking; and it was well; for if he had not done as + those thinkings taught him, he would have given a very different turn to + his history. Meditation and resolve, on the top of honourable habit, + brought him to this, that, when he saw what was right, he just did it—did + it without hesitation, question, or struggle. Every man must, who would be + a free man, who would not be the slave of the universe and of himself. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0017" id="link2HCH0017"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XVII. The baker's cart. + </h2> + <p> + The sweepings of the mill-floor did not last them long, and by the time + they saw rising before them the spires and chimneys of the small county + town to which the road had been leading them, they were very hungry indeed—as + hungry as they well could be without having begun to grow faint. The + moment he saw them, Clare began revolving in his mind once more, as many + times on the way, what he was to do to get work: Tommy of course was too + small to do anything, and Clare must earn enough for both. He could think + of nothing but going into the shops, or knocking at the house-doors, and + asking for something to do. So filled was he with his need of work, and + with the undefined sense of a claim for work, that he never thought how + much against him must be the outward appearance which had so dismayed + himself when he saw it in the pond; never thought how unwilling any one + would be to employ him, or what a disadvantage was the company of Tommy, + who had every mark of a born thief. + </p> + <p> + I do not know if, on his tramps, Tommy had been in a town before, but to + Clare all he saw bore the aspect of perfect novelty, notwithstanding the + few city-shapes that floated in faintest shadow, like memories of old + dreams, in his brain. He was delighted with the grand look of the place, + with its many people and many shops. His hope of work at once became + brilliant and convincing. + </p> + <p> + Noiselessly and suddenly Tommy started from his side, but so much occupied + was he with what he beheld and what he thought, that he neither saw him go + nor missed him when gone. He became again aware of him by finding himself + pulled toward the entrance of a narrow lane. Tommy pulled so hard that + Clare yielded, and went with him into the lane, but stopped immediately. + For he saw that Tommy had under his arm a big loaf, and the steam of + newly-baked bread was fragrant in his nostrils. Never smoke so gracious + greeted those of incense-loving priest. Tommy tugged and tugged, but Clare + stood stock-still. + </p> + <p> + “Where did you get that beautiful loaf, Tommy?” he asked. + </p> + <p> + “Off on a baker's cart,” said Tommy. “Don't be skeered; he never saw me! + That was my business, an' I seed to 't.” + </p> + <p> + “Then you stole it, Tommy?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” grumbled Tommy, “—if that's the name you put upon it when + your trousers is so slack you've got to hold on to them or they'd trip you + up!” + </p> + <p> + “Where's the cart?” + </p> + <p> + “In the street there.” + </p> + <p> + “Come along.” + </p> + <p> + Clare took the loaf from Tommy, and turned to find the baker's cart. + Tommy's face fell, and he was conscious only of bitterness. Why had he + yielded to sentiment—not that he knew the word—when he longed + like fire to bury his sharp teeth in that heavenly loaf? Love—not to + mention a little fear—had urged him to carry it straight to Clare, + and this was his reward! He was going to give him up to the baker! There + was gratitude for you! He ought to have known better than trust <i>anybody</i>, + even Clare! Nobody was to be trusted but yourself! It did seem hard to + Tommy. + </p> + <p> + They had scarcely turned the corner when they came upon the cart. The + baker was looking the other way, talking to some one, and Clare thought to + lay down the loaf and say nothing about it: there was no occasion for the + ceremony of apology where offence was unknown. But in the very act the + baker turned and saw him. He sprang upon him, and collared him. The baker + was not nice to look at. + </p> + <p> + “I have you!” he cried, and shook him as if he would have shaken his head + off. + </p> + <p> + “It's quite a mistake, sir!” was all Clare could get out, so fierce was + the earthquake that rattled the house of his life. + </p> + <p> + “Mistaken am I? I like that!—Police!” + </p> + <p> + And with that the baker shook him again. + </p> + <p> + A policeman was not far off; he heard the man call, and came running. + </p> + <p> + “Here's a gen'leman as wants the honour o' your acquaintance, Bob!” said + the baker. + </p> + <p> + But Tommy saw that, from his size, he was more likely to get off than + Clare if he told the truth. + </p> + <p> + “Please, policeman,” he said, “it wasn't him; it was me as took the loaf.” + </p> + <p> + “You little liar!” shouted the baker. “Didn't I see him with his hand on + the loaf?” + </p> + <p> + “He was a puttin' of it back,” said Tommy. “I wish he'd been somewheres + else! See what he been an' got by it! If he'd only ha' let me run, there + wouldn't ha' been nobody the wiser. I <i>am</i> sorry I didn't run. Oh, I + <i>ham</i> so 'ungry!” + </p> + <p> + Tommy doubled himself up, with his hands inside the double. + </p> + <p> + “'Ungry, are you?” roared the baker. “That's what thieves off a baker's + cart ought to be! They ought to be always 'ungry—'ungry to all + eternity, they ought! An' that's what's goin' to be done to 'em!” + </p> + <p> + “Look here!” cried a pale-faced man in the front of the crowd, who seemed + a mechanic. “There's a way of tellin' whether the boy's speakin' the truth + <i>now</i>!” + </p> + <p> + He caught up the restored loaf, halved it cleverly, and handed each of the + boys a part. + </p> + <p> + “Now, baker, what's to pay?” he said, and drew himself up, for the man was + too angry at once to reply. + </p> + <p> + The boys were tearing at the delicious bread, blind and deaf to all about + them. + </p> + <p> + “P'r'aps you would like to give <i>me</i> in charge?” pursued their + saviour. + </p> + <p> + “Sixpence,” said the man sullenly. + </p> + <p> + The mechanic laid sixpence on the cover of the cart. + </p> + <p> + “I ought to ha' made you weigh and make up,” he said. “Where's your + scales?” + </p> + <p> + “Mind your own business.” + </p> + <p> + “I mean to. Here! I want another sixpenny loaf—but I want it weighed + this time!” + </p> + <p> + “I ain't bound to sell bread in the streets. You can go to the shop. Them + loaves is for reg'lar customers.” + </p> + <p> + He moved off with his cart, and the crowd began to disperse. The boys + stood absorbed, each in what remained of his half-loaf. + </p> + <p> + When he looked up, Clare saw that they were alone. But he caught sight of + their benefactor some way off, and ran after him. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, sir!” he said, “I was so hungry, I don't know whether I thanked you + for the loaf. We'd had nothing to-day but the sweepings of a mill.” + </p> + <p> + “God bless my soul!” said the man. “People say there's a God!” he added. + </p> + <p> + “I think there must be, sir, for you came by just then!” returned Clare. + </p> + <p> + “How do you come to be so hard-up, my boy? Somebody's to blame + somewheres!” + </p> + <p> + “There ain't no harm in being hungry, so long as the loaf comes!” rejoined + Clare. “When I get work we shall be all right!” + </p> + <p> + “That's your sort!” said the man. “But if there had been a God, as people + say, he would ha' made me fit to gi'e you a job, i'stead o' stan'in' here + as you see me, with ne'er a turn o' work to do for myself!” + </p> + <p> + “I'll work my hardest to pay you back your sixpence,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Nay, nay, lad! Don't you trouble about that. I ha' got two or three more + i' my pocket, thank God!” + </p> + <p> + “You have two Gods, have you, sir?” said Clare;”—one who does things + for you, and one who don't?” + </p> + <p> + “Come, you young shaver! you're too much for me!” said the man laughing. + </p> + <p> + Tommy, having finished his bread, here thought fit to join them. He came + slyly up, looking impudent now he was filled, with his hands where his + pockets should have been. + </p> + <p> + “It was you stole the loaf, you little rascal!” said the workman, seeing + thief in every line of the boy. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” answered Tommy boldly, “an' I don't see no harm. The baker had + lots, and he wasn't 'ungry! It was Clare made a mull of it! He's such a + duffer you don't know! He acshally took it back to the brute! He deserved + what he got! The loaf was mine. It wasn't his! <i>I</i> stole it!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, ho! it wasn't his! it was yours, was it?—Why do you go about + with a chap like this, young gentleman?” said the man, turning to Clare. + “I know by your speech you 'ain't been brought up alongside o' sech as + him!” + </p> + <p> + “I had to go away, and he came with me,” answered Clare. + </p> + <p> + “You'd better get rid of him. He'll get you into trouble.” + </p> + <p> + “I can't get rid of him,” replied Clare. “But I shall teach him not to + take what isn't his. He don't know better now. He's been ill-used all his + life.” + </p> + <p> + “You don't seem over well used yourself,” said the man. + </p> + <p> + He saw that Clare's clothes had been made for a boy in good circumstances, + though they had been long worn, and were much begrimed. His face, his + tone, his speech convinced him that they had been made for <i>him</i>, and + that he had had a gentle breeding. + </p> + <p> + “Look you here, young master,” he continued; “you have no right to be in + company with that boy. He'll bring you to grief as sure as I tell you.” + </p> + <p> + “I shall be able to bear it,” answered Clare with a sigh. + </p> + <p> + “He'll be the loss of your character to you.” + </p> + <p> + “I 'ain't got a character to lose,” replied Clare. “I thought I had; but + when nobody will believe me, where's my character then?” + </p> + <p> + “Now you're wrong there,” returned the man. “I'm not much, I know; but I + believe every word you say, and should be very sorry to find myself + mistaken.” + </p> + <p> + “Thank you, sir,” said Clare. “May I carry your bag for you?” + </p> + <p> + If Clare had seen what then passed in Tommy's mind, at the back of those + glistening ferret-eyes of his, he would have been almost reconciled to + taking the man's advice, and getting rid of him. Tommy was saying to + himself that his pal wasn't such a duffer after all—he was on the + lay for the man's tools! + </p> + <p> + Tommy never reasoned except in the direction of cunning self-help—of + fitting means and intermediate ends to the one main object of eating. It + is wonderful what a sharpener of the poor wits hunger is! + </p> + <p> + “I guess I'm the abler-bodied pauper!” answered the man; and picking up + the bag he had dropped at his feet while they conversed, he walked away. + </p> + <p> + There are many more generous persons among the poor than among the rich—a + fact that might help some to understand how a rich man should find it hard + to enter into the kingdom of heaven. It is hard for everybody, but harder + for the rich. Men who strive to make money are unconsciously pulling + instead of pushing at the heavy gate of the kingdom. + </p> + <p> + “Tommy!” said Clare, in a tone new to himself, for a new sense of moral + protection had risen in him, “if ever you steal anything again, either I + give you a hiding, or you and I part company.” + </p> + <p> + Tommy bored his knuckles into his red eyes, and began to whimper. Again it + was hard for Tommy! He had followed Clare, thinking to supply what was + lacking to him; to do for him what he was not clever enough to do for + himself; in short, to make an advantageous partnership with him, to which + he should furnish the faculty of picking up unconsidered trifles. Tommy + judged Clare defective in intellect, and quite unpractical. He was of the + mind of the multitude. The common-minded man always calls the man who + thinks of righteousness before gain, who seeks to do the will of God and + does not seek to make a fortune, unpractical. He <i>will</i> not see that + the very essence of the practical lies in doing the right thing. + </p> + <p> + Tommy, in a semi-conscious way, had looked to Clare to supply the strength + and the innocent look, while he supplied the head and the lively fingers; + and here was Clare knocking the lovely plan to pieces! He did well to be + angry! But Clare was the stronger; and Tommy knew that, when Clare was + roused, though it was not easy to rouse him, he could and would and did + fight—not, indeed, as the little coward said to himself <i>he</i> + could fight, like a wild cat, but like a blundering hornless old cow + defending her calf from a cur. + </p> + <p> + In the heart of all his selfishness, however, Tommy did a little love + Clare; and his love came, not from Tommy, but from the same source as his + desire for food, namely, from the God that was in Tommy, the God in whom + Tommy lived and had his being with Clare. Whether Tommy's love for Clare + would one day lift him up beside Clare, that is, make him an honest boy + like Clare, remained to be seen. + </p> + <p> + Finding his demonstration make no impression, Tommy took his knuckles out + of his eye-holes and thrust them into his pocket-holes, turned his back on + his friend, and began to whistle—with a lump of self-pity in his + throat. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0018" id="link2HCH0018"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XVIII. Beating the town. + </h2> + <p> + They turned their faces again toward the centre of the town, and resumed + their walk, taking in more of what they saw than while they had not yet + had the second instalment of their daily bread. What a thing is food! It + is the divineness of the invention—the need for the food, and the + food for the need—that makes those who count their dinner the most + important thing in the day, such low creatures: nothing but what is good + in itself can be turned into vileness. It is a delight to see a boy with a + good honest appetite; a boy that <i>loves</i> his dinner is a loathsome + creature. Eat heartily, my boy, but be ready to share, even when you are + hungry, and have only what you could eat up yourself, else you are no man. + Remember that you created neither your hunger nor your food; that both + came from one who cares for you and your neighbours as well. + </p> + <p> + In the strength of the half-loaf he had eaten, the place looked to Clare + far more wonderful, and his hopes of earning his bread grew yet more + radiant. But he passed one shop after another, and always something + prevented him from going in. One after another did not look just the right + sort, did not seem to invite him: the next might be better! I dare say but + for that half-loaf, he would have made a trial sooner, but I doubt if he + would have succeeded sooner. He did not think of going to parson, doctor, + or policeman for advice; he went walking and staring, followed by Tommy + with his hands in his pocketless pocket-holes. Clare was not yet practical + in device, though perfect in willingness, and thorough in design. Up one + street and down another they wandered, seeing plenty of food through + windows, and in carts and baskets, but never any coming their way, except + in the form of tempting odours that issued from almost every house, and + grew in keenness and strength toward one o'clock. Oh those odours!—agonizing + angels of invisible yet most material good! Of what joys has not the + Father made us capable, when the poorest necessity is linked with such + pain! What a tormenting thing—and what a good must be meant to come + out of it!—to be hungry, downright, cravingly hungry with the whole + microcosm, and not a halfpenny to buy a mouthful of assuagement!—to + be assailed with wafts of deliriously undefined promise, not one of which + seems likely to be fulfilled!—promise true to men hurrying home to + dinner or luncheon, but only rousing greater desire in such as Clare and + Tommy. Not one opportunity of appropriation presented itself, else it + would have gone ill with Tommy, now that the eyes and ears of his guardian + were on the alert. For Clare thought of him now as a little thievish pup, + for whose conduct, manners, and education he was responsible. + </p> + <p> + The agony began at length to abate—ready to revive with augmented + strength when the next hour for supplying the human furnace should begin + to approach. Few even of those who know what hunger is, understand to what + it may grow—how desire becomes longing, longing becomes craving, and + craving a wild passion of demand. It must be terrible to be hungry, and + not know God! + </p> + <p> + As the evening came down upon them, worn out, faint with want, shivering + with cold, and as miserable in prospect as at the moment, yet another need + presented itself with equally imperative requisition—that of shelter + that they might rest. It was even more imperative: they could not eat; + they <i>must</i> lie down! + </p> + <p> + Whether it be a rudiment retained from their remote ancestry, I cannot + tell, but any kind of suffering will wake in some a masterful impulse to + burrow; and as the boys walked about in their misery, white with cold and + hunger, Clare's eyes kept turning to every shallowest archway, every + breach in wall or hedge that seemed to offer the least chance of covert, + while, every now and then, Tommy would bolt from his side to peer into + some opening whose depth was not immediately patent to his ferret-gaze. + Once, in a lane on the outskirts of the town, he darted into a narrow + doorway in the face of a wall, but instantly rushed back in horror: within + was a well, where water lay still and dark. Then first Clare had a hint of + the peculiar dread Tommy had of water, especially of water dark and + unexpected. Possibly he had once been thrown into such water to be got rid + of. But Clare at the moment was too weary to take much notice of his + dismay. + </p> + <p> + It was an old town in which they were wandering, and change in the + channels of traffic had so turned its natural nourishment aside, that it + was in parts withering and crumbling away. Not a few of the houses were, + some from poverty, some from utter disuse, yielding fast to decay. But + there were other causes for the condition of one, which, almost directly + they came out of the lane I have just mentioned, into the end of a wide + silent street, drew the roving, questing eyes of Clare and Tommy. The moon + was near the full and shining clear, so that they could perfectly see the + state it was in. Most of its windows were broken; its roof was like the + back of a very old horse; its chimney-pots were jagged and stumped with + fracture; from one of them, by its entangled string, the skeleton of a + kite hung half-way down the front. But, notwithstanding such signs of + neglect, the red-brick wall and the wrought-iron gate, both seven feet + high, that shut the place off from the street, stood in perfect aged + strength. The moment they saw it, the house seemed to say to them, + “There's nobody here: come in!” but the gate and the wall said, “Begone!” + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0019" id="link2HCH0019"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XIX. The blacksmith and his forge. + </h2> + <p> + At the end of the wall was a rough boarded fence, in contact with it, and + reaching, some fifty yards or so, to a hovel in which a blacksmith, of + unknown antecedents, had taken possession of a forsaken forge, and did + what odd jobs came in his way. The boys went along the fence till they + came to the forge, where, looking in, they saw the blacksmith working his + bellows. To one with the instincts of Clare's birth and breeding, he did + not look a desirable acquaintance. Tommy was less fastidious, but he felt + that the scowl on the man's brows boded little friendliness. Clare, + however, who hardly knew what fear was, did not hesitate to go in, for he + was drawn as with a cart-rope by the glow of the fire, and the sparks + which, as they gazed, began, like embodied joys, to fly merrily from the + iron. Tommy followed, keeping Clare well between him and the black-browed + man, who rained his blows on the rosy iron in his pincers, as if he hated + it. + </p> + <p> + “What do you want, gutter-toads?” he cried, glancing up and seeing them + approach. “This ain't a hotel.” + </p> + <p> + “But it's a splendid fire,” rejoined Clare, looking into his face with a + wan smile, “and we're so cold!” + </p> + <p> + “What's that to me!” returned the man, who, savage about something, was + ready to quarrel with anything. “I didn't make my fire to warm little + devils that better had never been born!” + </p> + <p> + “No, sir,” answered Clare; “but I don't think we'd better not have been + born. We're both cold, and nobody but Tommy knows how hungry I am; but + your fire is so beautiful that, if you would let us stand beside it a + minute or two, we wouldn't at all mind.” + </p> + <p> + “Mind, indeed! Mind what, you preaching little humbug?” + </p> + <p> + “Mind being born, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “Why do you say <i>sir</i> to me? Don't you see I'm a working man?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, and that's why. I think we ought to say <i>sir</i> and <i>ma'am</i> + to every one that can do something we can't. Tommy and I can't make iron + do what we please, and you can, sir! It would be a grand thing for us if + we could!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, yes, a grand thing, no doubt!—Why?” + </p> + <p> + “Because then we could get something to eat, and somewhere to lie down.” + </p> + <p> + “Could you? Look at me, now! I can do the work of two men, and can't get + work for half a man!” + </p> + <p> + “That's a sad pity!” said Clare. “I wish I had work! Then I would bring + you something to eat.” + </p> + <p> + The man did not tell them why he had not work enough—that his + drunkenness, and the bad ways to which it had brought him, with the fact + that he so often dawdled over the work that was given him, caused people + to avoid him. + </p> + <p> + “Who said I hadn't enough to eat? I ain't come to that yet, young 'un! + What made you say that?” + </p> + <p> + “Because when I had work, I had plenty to eat; and now that I have nothing + to do, I have nothing to eat. It's well I haven't work now, though,” added + Clare with a sigh, “for I'm too tired to do any. Please may I sit on this + heap of ashes?” + </p> + <p> + “Sit where you like, so long 's you keep out o' my way. I 'ain't got + nothing to give you but a bar of iron. I'll toast one for you if you would + like a bite.” + </p> + <p> + “No, thank you, sir,” answered Clare, with a smile. “I'm afraid it + wouldn't be digestible. They say toasted cheese ain't. I wish I had a try + though!” + </p> + <p> + “You're a comical shaver, you are!” said the blacksmith. “You'll come to + the gallows yet, if you're a good boy! Them Sunday-schools is doin' a heap + for the gallows!—That ain't your brother?” + </p> + <p> + By this time Tommy had begun to feel at home with the blacksmith, from + whose face the cloud had lifted a little, so that he looked less + dangerous. He had edged nearer to the fire, and now stood in the light of + it. + </p> + <p> + “No,” answered Clare, with an odd doubtfulness in his tone. “I ought to + say <i>yes</i>, perhaps, for all men are my brothers; but I mean I haven't + any particular one of my very own.” + </p> + <p> + “That ain't no pity; he'd ha' been no better than you. I've a brother I + would choke any minute I got a chance.” + </p> + <p> + While they talked, the blacksmith had put his iron in the fire, and again + stood blowing the bellows, when his attention was caught by the gestures + of the little red-eyed imp, Tommy, who was making rapid signs to him, + touching his forehead with one finger, nodding mysteriously, and pointing + at Clare with the thumb of his other hand, held close to his side. He + sought to indicate thus that his companion was an innocent, whom nobody + must mind. In the blacksmith Tommy saw one of his own sort, and the + blacksmith saw neither in Tommy nor in Clare any reason to doubt the hint + given him. Not the less was he inclined to draw out the idiot. + </p> + <p> + “Why do you let him follow you about, if he ain't your brother?” he said. + “He ain't nice to look at!” + </p> + <p> + “I want to make him nice,” answered Clare, “and then he'll be nice to look + at. You mustn't mind him, please, sir. He's a very little boy, and 'ain't + been well brought up. His granny ain't a good woman—at least not + very, you know, Tommy!” he added apologetically. + </p> + <p> + “She's a damned old sinner!” said Tommy stoutly. + </p> + <p> + The man laughed. + </p> + <p> + “Ha, ha, my chicken! you know a thing or two!” he said, as he took his + iron from the fire, and laid it again on the anvil. + </p> + <p> + But besides the brother he would so gladly strangle, there was an idiot + one whom he had loved a little and teazed so much, that, when he died, his + conscience was moved. He felt therefore a little tender toward the idiot + before him. He bethought himself also that his job would soon be at a + stage where the fewer the witnesses the better, for he was executing a + commission for certain burglars of his acquaintance. He would do no more + that night! He had money in his pocket, and he wanted a drink! + </p> + <p> + “Look here, cubs!” he said; “if you 'ain't got nowhere to go to, I don't + mind if you sleep here. There ain't no bed but the bed of the forge, nor + no blankets but this leather apron: you may have them, for you can't do + them no sort of harm. I don't mind neither if you put a shovelful of slack + and a little water now and then on the fire; and if you give it a blow or + two with the bellows now and then, you won't be stone-dead afore the + mornin'!—Don't be too free with the coals, now, and don't set the + shed on fire, and take the bread out of my poor innocent mouth. Mind what + I tell you, and be good boys.” + </p> + <p> + “Thank you, sir,” said Clare. “I thought you would be kind to us! I've one + friend, a bull, that's very good to me. So is Jonathan. He's a horse. The + bull's name is Nimrod. He wants to gore always, but he's never cross with + me.” + </p> + <p> + The blacksmith burst into a roar of laughter at the idiotic speech. Then + he covered the fire with coal, threw his apron over Clare's head, and + departed, locking the door of the smithy behind him. + </p> + <p> + The boys looked at each other. Neither spoke. Tommy turned to the bellows, + and began to blow. + </p> + <p> + “Ain't you warm yet?” said Clare, who had seen his mother careful over the + coals. + </p> + <p> + “No, I ain't. I want a blaze.” + </p> + <p> + “Leave the fire alone. The coal is the smith's, and he told us not to + waste it.” + </p> + <p> + “He ain't no count!” said Tommy, as heartless as any grown man or woman + set on pleasure. + </p> + <p> + “He has given us a place to be warm and sleep in! It would be a shame to + do anything he didn't like. Have you no conscience, Tommy?” + </p> + <p> + “No,” said Tommy, who did not know conscience from copper. The germ of it + no doubt lay in the God-part of him, but it lay deep. Tommy—no worse + than many a boy born of better parents—was like a hill full of + precious stones, that grows nothing but a few little dry shrubs, and + shoots out cold sharp rocks every here and there. + </p> + <p> + “If you have no conscience,” answered Clare, “one must serve for both—as + far as it will reach! Leave go of that bellows, or I'll make you.” + </p> + <p> + Tommy let the lever go, turned his back, and wandered, in such dudgeon as + he was capable of, to the other side of the shed. + </p> + <p> + “Hello!” he cried, “here's a door!—and it ain't locked, it's only + bolted! Let's go and see!” + </p> + <p> + “You may if you like,” answered Clare, “but if you touch anything of the + blacksmith's, I'll be down on you.” + </p> + <p> + “All right!” said Tommy, and went out to see if there was anything to be + picked up. + </p> + <p> + Clare got on the stone hearth of the forge, and lay down in the hot ashes, + too far gone with hunger to care for the clothes that were almost beyond + caring for. He was soon fast asleep; and warmth and sleep would do nearly + as much for him as food. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0020" id="link2HCH0020"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XX. Tommy reconnoitres. + </h2> + <p> + Tommy, out in the moonlight, found himself in a waste yard, scattered over + with bits of iron, mostly old and rusty. It was not an interesting place, + for it was not likely to afford him anything to eat. Yet, with the + instinct of the human animal, he went shifting and prying and nosing about + everywhere. Presently he heard a curious sound, which he recognized as + made by a hen. More stealthily yet he went creeping hither and thither, + feeling here and feeling there, in the hope of laying his hand on the fowl + asleep. Urged by his natural impulse to forage, he had forgotten Clare's + warning. His hand did find her, and had it been his grandmother instead of + Clare in the smithy, he would at once have broken the bird's neck before + she could cry out; but with the touch of her feathers came the thought of + Clare, and by this time he understood that what Clare said, Clare would + do. + </p> + <p> + He had some knowledge of fowls; he had heard too much talk about them at + his grandmother's not to know something of their habits; and finding she + sat so still, he concluded that under her might be eggs. To his delight it + was so. The hen belonged to a house at some distance, and had wandered + from it, in obedience to the secretive instinct of animal maternity, + strong in some hens, to seek a hidden shelter for her offspring. This she + had found in the smith's yard, beneath the mould-board of a plough that + had lain there for years. Slipping his hand under her, Tommy found five + eggs. In greedy haste he took them, every one. + </p> + <p> + I must do him the justice to say that his first impulse was to dart with + them to Clare. But before he had taken a step toward him, again he + remembered his threat. With the eggs inside him, he could run the risk; he + would not mind a few blows—not much; but if he took them to Clare, + the unbearable thing was, that he would assuredly give every one of them + back to the hen. He was an idiot, and Tommy was there to look after him; + but, in looking after Clare, was Tommy to neglect himself? If Clare would + not eat the eggs Tommy carried him, as most certainly he would not, the + best thing was for Tommy to eat them himself! What a good thing that it + was no use to steal for Clare! The steal would be all for himself! Not a + step from the spot did Tommy move till he had sucked every one of the five + eggs. But he made one mistake: he threw away the shells. + </p> + <p> + When he had sucked them, he found himself much lighter-hearted, but, alas, + nearly as hungry as before! The spirit of research began again to move + him: where were eggs, what might there not be beside? + </p> + <p> + The moon was nearly at the full; the smith's yard was radiantly + illuminated. But even the moon could lend little enchantment to a scene + where nothing was visible but rusty, broken, deserted, despairful pieces + of old iron. Tommy lifted his eyes and looked further. + </p> + <p> + The enclosure was of small extent, bounded on one side by the garden wall + of the house they had just passed, and at the bottom by a broken fence, + dividing it from a piece of waste land that probably belonged to the + house. As he roamed about, Tommy spied a great heap of old iron piled up + against the wall, and made for it, in the hope of enlarging his horizon. + He scrambled to the top, and looked over. His gaze fell right into a big + but, full of dark water. Twice that evening he met the same horror! There + was a legendary report, though he had not heard it, I fancy, that his + mother drowned herself instead of him: she fell in, and he was fished out. + Whether this was the origin of his fear or not, so far from getting down + by means of the water-but, Tommy dared not cross at that point. With much + trembling he got on the top of the wall, turned his back on the butt, and + ran along like a cat, in search of a place where he could descend into the + garden. He went right to the end, round the corner, and half-way along the + bottom before he found one. There he came to a doorway that had been + solidly walled up on the outside, while the door was left in position on + the inside—ready for use when the court of chancery should have + decided to whom the house belonged. Its frame was flush with the wall, so + that its bolts and lock afforded Tommy foothold enough to descend, and + confidence of being able to get up again. + </p> + <p> + He landed in a moonlit wilderness—such a wilderness as a deserted + garden speedily becomes, the wealth in the soil converting it the sooner + to a savage chaos. Full of the impulse of discovery, and the hope of + presenting himself with importance to Clare as the bringer of good + tidings, Tommy forced his way through or crept under the overgrown bushes, + until he reached a mossy rather than gravelly walk, where it was more easy + to advance. It led him to the house. + </p> + <p> + Had he been a boy of any imagination, he would have shuddered at the + thought of attempting an entrance. All the windows had outside shutters. + Those of the ground floor were closed—except one that swung to and + fro, and must have swung in many a wind since the house was abandoned. The + moon shone with a dull whitish gleam on the dusty windows of the first and + second stories, and on the great dormers that shot out from the slope of + the roof, and cast strange shadows upon it. The door to the garden had had + a porch of trellis-work, over which jasmine and other creeping plants were + trained; but whether anything of the porch was left, no one could have + told in that thicket of creepers, interlaced and matted by antagonist + forces of wind and growth so that not a hint of door was visible. Clearly + there was nobody within. + </p> + <p> + Tommy sought the window with the open shutter. Through the dirty glass, + and the reflection of the moon, he could see nothing. He tried the sash, + but could not stir it. He went round the corner to one end of the house, + and saw another door. But an enemy stepped between: the moon shone + suddenly up from the ground. In a hollow of the pavement had gathered a + pool from the drip of the neglected gutters, and out of its hidden depth + the staring round looked at him. It was the third time Tommy's nerves had + been shaken that night, and he could stand no more. At the awful vision he + turned and fled, fell, and rose and fled again. It was not imagination in + Tommy; it was an undefined, inexplicable horror, that must have had a + cause, but could have no reason. Young as he was he had already more than + once looked on the face of death, and had felt no awe; he had listened to + the gruesomest of tales, told not altogether without art, and had never + moved a hair Only one material and two spiritual things had power with + him; the one material thing was hunger, the two spiritual things were a + feeble love for Clare, and a strong horror of water of any seeming depth. + Now a new element was added to this terror by the meddling of the moon in + the fiendish mystery—the secret of which must, I think, have been + the bottomless depth she gave the water. + </p> + <p> + He rushed down the garden. With frightful hindrance from the overgrowth, + he found the prisoned door by strange perversion become a ladder, gained + by it the top of the wall, and sped along as if pursued by an incarnate + dread. Horror of horrors! all at once the moon again looked up at him from + below: he was within a yard or two of the big water-butt! Right up to it + he must go, for, close to it, on the other side of the wall, was the heap + of iron by which alone he could get down. He tightened every nerve for the + effort. He assured himself that the thing would be over in a moment; that + the water was quiet, and could not follow him; that presently he would + find himself in the smithy by the warm forge-fire. The scaring necessity + was, that he must stoop and kneel right over the water-but, in order to + send his legs in advance down the wall to the top of the mound. It was a + moment of agony. That very moment, with an appalling unearthly cry, + something dark, something hideous, something of inconceivable ghastliness, + as it seemed to Tommy, sprang right out of the water into the air. He + tumbled from the wall among the iron, and there lay. + </p> + <p> + The stolen eggs were avenged. The hen, feverish and unhappy from the loss + of her hope of progeny, had gone to the butt to sip a little water. Tommy, + appearing on the wall above her, startled her. She, flying up with a + screech, startled Tommy, and became her own unwitting avenger. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0021" id="link2HCH0021"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXI. Tommy is found and found out. + </h2> + <p> + When Clare woke from his first sleep, which he did within an hour—for + he was too hungry to sleep straight on, and the door, imperfectly closed + by Tommy, had come open, and let in a cold wind with the moonlight—he + raised himself on his elbow, and peered from his stone shelf into the + dreary hut. He could not at once tell where he was, but when he + remembered, his first thought was Tommy. He looked about for him. Tommy + was nowhere. Then he saw the open door, and remembered he had gone out. + Surely it was time he had come back! Stiff and sore, he turned on his + longitudinal axis, crept down from the forge, and went out shivering to + look for his imp. The moon shone radiant on the rusty iron, and the + glamour of her light rendered not a few of its shapes and fragments + suggestive of cruel torture. Picking his way among spikes and corners and + edges, he walked about the hideous wilderness searching for Tommy, afraid + to call for fear of attracting attention. The hen too was walking about, + disconsolate, but she took no notice of him, neither did the sight of her + give him any hint or rouse in him the least suspicion: how could he + suspect one so innocent and troubled for the avenging genius through whom + Tommy's white face lay upturned to the white moon! Her egg-shells lay + scattered, each a ghastly point in the moonshine, each a silent witness to + the deed that had been done. Tommy scattered and forgot them; the moon + gathered and noted them. But they told Clare nothing, either of Tommy's + behaviour or of Tommy himself. + </p> + <p> + He came at last to the heap of metal, and there lay Tommy, caught in its + skeleton protrusions. A shiver went through him when he saw the pallid + face, and the dark streak of blood across it. He concluded that in trying + to get over the wall he had failed and fallen back. He climbed and took + him in his arms. Tommy was no weight for Clare, weak with hunger as he + was, to carry to the smithy. He laid him on the hearth, near the fire, and + began to blow it up. The roaring of the wind in the fire did not wake him. + Clare went on blowing. The heat rose and rose, and brought the boy to + himself at last, in no comfortable condition. He opened his eyes, + scrambled to his feet, and stared wildly around him. + </p> + <p> + “Where is it?” he cried. + </p> + <p> + “Where's what?” rejoined Clare, leaving the bellows, and taking a hold of + him lest he should fall off. + </p> + <p> + “The head that flew out of the water-but,” answered Tommy with a shudder. + </p> + <p> + “Have you lost your senses, Tommy?” remonstrated Clare. “I found you lying + on a heap of old iron against the wall, with the moon shining on you.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, yes!—the moon! She jumped out of the water-but, and got a hold + of me as I was getting down. I knew she would!” + </p> + <p> + “I didn't think you were such a fool, Tommy!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Well, you hadn't the pluck to go yourself! You stopt in!” cried Tommy, + putting his hand to his head, but more sorely hurt that an idiot should + call him a fool. + </p> + <p> + “Come and let me see, Tommy,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + He wanted to find out if he was much hurt; but Tommy thought he wanted to + go to the water-but, and screamed. + </p> + <p> + “Hold your tongue, you little idiot!” cried Clare. “You'll have all the + world coming after us! They'll think I'm murdering you!” + </p> + <p> + Tommy restrained himself, and gradually recovering, told Clare what he had + discovered, but not what he had found. + </p> + <p> + “There's something yellow on your jacket! What is it?” said Clare. “I do + believe—yes, it is!—you've been eating an egg! Now I remember! + I saw egg-shells, more than two or three, lying in the yard, and the poor + hen walking about looking for her eggs! You little rascal! You pig of a + boy! I won't thrash you this time, because you've fetched your own + thrashing. But—!” + </p> + <p> + He finished the sentence by shaking his fist in Tommy's face, and looking + as black at him as he was able. + </p> + <p> + “I do believe it was the hen herself that frighted you!” he added. “She + served you right, you thief!” + </p> + <p> + “I didn't know there was any harm,” said Tommy, pretending to sob. + </p> + <p> + “Why didn't you bring me my share, then?” + </p> + <p> + “'Cos I knowed you'd ha' made me give 'em back to the hen!” + </p> + <p> + “And you didn't know there was any harm, you lying little brute!” + </p> + <p> + “No, I didn't.” + </p> + <p> + “Now, look here, Tommy! If you don't mind what I tell you, you and I part + company. One of us two must be master, and I will, or you must tramp. Do + you hear me?” + </p> + <p> + “I can't do without wictuals!” whimpered Tommy. “I didn't come wi' <i>you</i> + a purpose to be starved to death!” + </p> + <p> + “I dare say you didn't; but when I starve, you must starve too; and when I + eat, you shall have the first mouthful. What did you come with me for?” + </p> + <p> + “'Acos you was the strongest,” answered Tommy, “an' I reckoned you would + get things from coves we met!” + </p> + <p> + “Well, I'm not going to get things from coves we meet, except they give + them to me. But have patience, Tommy, and I'll get you all you can eat. + You must give me time, you know! I 'ain't got work yet!—Come here. + Lie down close to me, and we'll go to sleep.” + </p> + <p> + The urchin obeyed, pillowed his head on Clare's chest, and went fast + asleep. + </p> + <p> + Clare slept too after a while, but the necessities of his relation to + Tommy were fast making a man of him. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0022" id="link2HCH0022"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXII. The smith in a rage. + </h2> + <p> + They had not slept long, when they were roused by a hideous clamour and + rattling at the door, and thunderous blows on the wooden sides of the + shed. Clare woke first, and rubbed his eyelids, whose hinges were rusted + with sleep. He was utterly perplexed with the uproar and romage. The cabin + seemed enveloped in a hurricane of kicks, and the air was in a tumult of + howling and brawling, of threats and curses, whose inarticulateness made + them sound bestial. There never came pause long enough for Clare to answer + that they were locked in, and that the smith must have the key in his + pocket. But when Tommy came to himself, which he generally did the instant + he woke, but not so quickly this time because of his fall, he understood + at once. + </p> + <p> + “It's the blacksmith! He's roaring drunk!” he said. + </p> + <p> + “Let's be off, Clare! The devil 'ill be to pay when he gets in! He'll + murder us in our beds!” + </p> + <p> + “We ought to let him into his own house if we can,” replied Clare, rising + and going to the door. It was well for him that he found no way of opening + it, for every instant there came a kick against it that threatened to + throw it from lock and hinges at once. He protested his inability, but the + madman thought he was refusing to admit him, and went into a tenfold fury, + calling the boys hideous names, and swearing he would set the shed on fire + if they did not open at once. The boys shouted, but the man had no sense + to listen with, and began such a furious battery on the door, with his + whole person for a ram, that Tommy made for the rear, and Clare followed—prudent + enough, however, in all his haste, to close the back-door behind them. + </p> + <p> + Tommy was in front, and led the way to the bottom of the yard, and over + the fence into the waste ground, hoping to find some point in that quarter + where he could mount the wall. He could not face the water-but—with + the moon in it, staring out of the immensity of the lower world. He ran + and doubled and spied, but could find no foothold. Least of all was ascent + possible at the spot where the door stood on the other side; the bricks + were smoother than elsewhere. He turned the corner and ran along a narrow + lane, Clare still following, for he thought Tommy knew what he was about; + but Tommy could find no encouragement to attempt scaling the wall. They + might have fled into the fields that lay around; but the burrowing + instinct was strong, and the deserted house drew them. Then Clare, finding + Tommy at fault, bethought him that the little rascal had got up by the + heap on which he discovered him, and must be afraid to go that way again. + He faced about and ran, in his turn become leader. Tommy wheeled also, and + followed, but with misgiving. When they reached the farther corner of the + bottom wall, they stopped and peeped round before they would turn it: they + might run against the blacksmith in chase of them! But the sound of his + continued hammering at the door came to them, and they went on. They + crossed the fence and ran again, ran faster, for now every step brought + them nearer to their danger: the heap of iron lay between them and the + smithy, and any moment the smith might burst into the shed, rush through, + and be out upon them. + </p> + <p> + They reached the heap. Clare sprang up; and Tommy, urged on the one side + by the fear of the drunken smith, and drawn on the other by the dread of + being abandoned by Clare, climbed shuddering after him. + </p> + <p> + “Mind the water-but, Clare!” he gasped; “an' gi' me a hand up.” + </p> + <p> + Clare had already turned on the top of the wall to help him. + </p> + <p> + “Now let me go first!” said Tommy, the moment he had his foot on it. “I + know how to get down.” + </p> + <p> + He scudded along the wall, glad to have Clare between him and the butt. + Clare followed swiftly. He was not so quick on the cat-promenade as Tommy, + but he had a good head, and was spurred by the apprehension of being seen + up there in the moonlight. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0023" id="link2HCH0023"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXIII. Treasure trove. + </h2> + <p> + In a few moments they were safe in the thicket at the foot of what had + been their enemy and was now their friend—the garden-wall. How many + things and persons there are whose other sides are altogether friendly! + These are their true selves, and we must be true to get at them. + </p> + <p> + Tommy again took the lead, though with a fresh sinking of the heart + because of that other place with the moon in it. Through the tangled + thicket they made or found their way—and there stood the house, with + the moon looking down on its roof, and the drunkard's thunder troubling + her still pale light—her <i>moon-thinking</i>. But for the noise and + the haste, Clare would have been frightened at them. There seemed some + secret between the house and the moon which they were determined no one + else should share. They were of one mind to terrify man or boy who should + attempt to cross the threshold! There was no time, however, to heed such + fancies. “If we could only get in without spoiling anything!” thought + Clare. Once in, they would hurt nothing, take but the shelter and rest + lying there of no good to anybody, and leave them there all the same when + they had done with them! + </p> + <p> + While they stood looking at the house, the thundering at the door of the + smithy ceased. Presently they heard voices in altercation. One voice was + that of the smith, quieter than when last they heard it, but ill-tempered + and growling as at first. The other seemed that of a woman. She had been + able so far to quiet him, probably, that he remembered he had the key in + his pocket; for they thought they heard the door of the smithy open. Then + all was silent, and the outcasts pursued their quest of an entrance to the + house. + </p> + <p> + Clare went ferreting as Tommy had done. He also tried to get a peep + through the window with the swinging shutter, but had no better success + than Tommy. Then he started to go round the corner next the blacksmith's + yard. + </p> + <p> + “Look out!” cried Tommy in a loud whisper, when he saw where he was going. + </p> + <p> + “Why?” asked Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Because there's a horrible hole there, full of water,” answered Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “I'll keep a look out,” returned Clare, and went. + </p> + <p> + When he was about half-way along the end of the house, he heard a noise he + did not understand, and stopped to listen. Some one seemed moving + somewhere. + </p> + <p> + Then came a kind of scrambling sound, and presently the noise of a great + watery splash. Clare shivered from head to foot. + </p> + <p> + “Something has fallen into the hole Tommy mentioned!” he said to himself, + and ran on to see. A few steps brought him to what Tommy had taken for a + great hole. It was nothing but a pool of rain-water: the splash could not + have come from that! + </p> + <p> + Then it occurred to him that the water-but could not be far off. He forced + his way through shrubs of various kinds, and reaching the wall, went back + along it until he came to the butt. A ray of moonlight showed him that the + side of it was wet, as if the water had lately come over the edge. He + looked about for some means of getting a peep into the huge thing. It + stood on a brick stand, of which it left a narrow edge clear, but on this + edge the bulge of the butt would not permit him to mount. With the help of + a small tree, however, he got on the wall, which was better. + </p> + <p> + Spying into the butt, he could see nothing at first, for a chimney was now + between it and the moon. A moment more, however, and he descried something + white in the dull iron gleam of the water. It was under the water, but + floating near the surface. He lay down on the wall, plunged his arm into + the butt, laid hold of it, and drew it out. It was a little heavy for the + size, for what should it be but a tiny baby, in a flannel night-gown, + which, as he drew it out, sent back little noisy streams into the butt! It + lay perfectly still in his arms, he did not know whether dead or alive, + but he thought it could hardly be drowned so soon after the splash. It had + been drugged, and the antagonism of the two means employed to kill it was + probably the saving of its life. + </p> + <p> + Clare stood in stony bewilderment. What was he to do? Certainly not to go + after the mother! The first thing was to get it down from the wall. That + he could easily have done on the other side, by the heap; but that was the + side whence it must have been thrown, and they would be but in worse + difficulty there! He must get the baby down inside the wall! With at least + one arm occupied, the tree-way was impracticable. There was only one other + way, and that full of danger! But where there is only one way, that way + must be taken, and Clare did not hesitate. He started along the top of the + wall, with the poor unconscious germ of humanity in his arms. He had + lifted it from its watery coffin, out of the cold arms of death, up into + the clear air of life! True, that air was cold, and filled only with + moonshine; but there was the house whose seal might be broken! and the + moon saw the sun making warm the under world! Along the narrow way, + through the still, keen glimmer, unseen, probably, by any eye in the + sleeping town, he bore his burden, speeding as fast as he dared, for he + must not set a foot down amiss! + </p> + <p> + Had any one caught sight of him, what a commotion would not the tale have + roused—of the spectre of a boy with a baby in his arms, gliding + noiseless in the moon and the middle night, along the top of the high + brick wall of a deserted house, where no one had lived within the memory + of man! + </p> + <p> + When he reached the door-ladder, he found descent difficult but possible. + It was more difficult to make his way through the tangled bushes without + scratching the baby, which, after all, might, alas, be beyond hurt! He + held it close to his bosom, life coaxing life to “stay a little.” + </p> + <p> + Thus laden, he appeared before Tommy, who had heard the splash, and + thought Clare had fallen into the deep hole, but had not had courage to go + and see, partly from the fear of verifying his fear, but more from his + horror of the watery abyss. He stood trembling where Clare had left him. + </p> + <p> + To save the baby was now Clare's only thought. The baby was now the one + thing in the universe! If only the light that shone on it were that of the + hot sun instead of the cold moon, which looked far more like killing than + bringing to life! “And,” thought Clare with himself, “there ain't much + more heat in my body than in that shivery moon!” But the sun would wake + and mount the sky, and send the moon down, and all would be different! + Only, if nothing could be done in the meantime, where would baby be by + then! + </p> + <p> + “Here, Tommy,” he cried, “come and see what I found in the water-butt.” + </p> + <p> + At the word, Tommy turned to flee; but confidence in Clare, and curiosity + to see what, in Clare's arms, could hardly hurt him, prevailed, and he + drew near cautiously. + </p> + <p> + “Lord, it's a kid!” he cried. + </p> + <p> + “It's not a kid,” said Clare, who had no slang; “it's a baby!” + </p> + <p> + “Well! ain't a baby a kid, just?” + </p> + <p> + Tommy did not know that the word stood for anything else than a child, + which was indeed its meaning long before it was specially applied to the + young of the goat. A <i>kidnapper</i> or <i>kidnabber</i> is a stealer of + children. Mr. Skeat tells us that <i>kid</i> meant at first just a young + one. + </p> + <p> + “You can't tell me what to do with it, I'm afraid, Tommy!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + Already it was as if from all eternity he had loved this helpless little + waif of Time, with its small, thin, blue-gray, gin-drugged face; this tiny + life, so hopeless, so miserable, yet so uncomplaining: the thing that was, + was the thing for it to bear; it had come into the world to bear it! Ready + to die, even Death would not have it; it must live where it was not + wanted, where it was not welcome! + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I can!” answered Tommy with evil promptitude. “Put it in again.” + </p> + <p> + “But that would drown it, you know, Tommy!” answered Clare, treating him + like the child he was not. “We want it to live, Tommy!” + </p> + <p> + His tenderness for the baby made him speak with foolish gentleness. + </p> + <p> + “No, we don't!” returned Tommy. “What business has <i>it</i> to live, when + we can't get nothing to eat?” + </p> + <p> + Clare held faster to the baby with one arm, and with the fist of the other + struck straight out at Tommy, hit him between the eyes, and knocked him + flat. It was a miserable thing to have to do, and it made Clare miserable, + for Tommy was not half his size, and was still suffering from his fall on + the iron. But then the dying baby was not half Tommy's size, and any + milder argument would have been lost on him: he was thus sent on the way + to understand that the baby had rights; and that if the baby could not + enforce them, there was one in the world that could and would. Never in + his life did Clare show more instinctive wisdom than in that knock-down + blow to the hardly blamable little devil! + </p> + <p> + Tommy got up at once. He was not much hurt, for he had a hard head though + he was easily knocked over. From that moment he began to respect Clare. He + had loved him before in a way; he had patronized him, and feared to offend + him because he was stronger than he; but until now he had had no respect + for him, believing little Tommy a much finer fellow than big Clare. There + are thousands for whom a blow is a better thing than expostulation, + persuasion, or any sort of kindness. They are such that nothing but a blow + will set their door ajar for love to get in. That is why hardships, + troubles, disappointments, and all kinds of pain and suffering, are sent + to so many of us. We are so full of ourselves, and feel so grand, that we + should never come to know what poor creatures we are, never begin to do + better, but for the knock-down blows that the loving God gives us. We do + not like them, but he does not spare us for that. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0024" id="link2HCH0024"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXIV. Justifiable burglary. + </h2> + <p> + Tommy rose rubbing his forehead, and crying quietly. He did not dare say a + word. It was well for him he did not. Clare, perplexed and anxious about + the baby, was in no mood to accept annoyance from Tommy. But the urchin + remaining silent, the elder boy's indignation began immediately to settle + down. + </p> + <p> + The infant lay motionless, its little heart beating doubtfully, like the + ticking of a clock off the level, as if the last beat might be indeed the + last. + </p> + <p> + “We <i>must</i> get into the house, Tommy!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, Clare,” answered Tommy, very meekly, and went off like a shot to + renew investigation at the other end of the house. He was back in a + moment, his face as radiant with success as such a face could be, with + such a craving little body under it. + </p> + <p> + “Come, come,” he cried. “We can get in quite easy. I ha' <i>been</i> in!” + </p> + <p> + The keen-eyed monkey had found a cellar-window, sunk a little below the + level of the ground—a long, narrow, horizontal slip, with a grating + over its small area not fastened down. He had lifted it, and pushed open + the window, which went inward on rusty hinges—so rusty that they + would not quite close again. That he had been in was a lie. <i>He</i> knew + better than go first! He belonged to the school of <i>No. 1!</i>—all + mean beggars. + </p> + <p> + Clare hastened after him. + </p> + <p> + “Gi' me the kid, an' you get in; you can reach up for it better, 'cause + ye're taller,” said Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “Is it much of a drop?” asked Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Nothing much,” answered Tommy. + </p> + <p> + Clare handed him the baby, instructing him how to hold it, and threatening + him if he hurt it; then laid himself on his front, shoved his legs across + the area through the window, and followed with his body. Holding on to the + edge of the window-sill, he let his feet as far down as he could, then + dropped, and fell on a heap of coals, whence he tumbled to the floor of + the cellar. + </p> + <p> + “You should have told me of the coals!” he said, rising, and calling up + through the darkness. + </p> + <p> + “I forgot,” answered Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “Give me the baby,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + When Tommy took the baby, he renewed that moment, and began to cherish the + sense of an injury done him by the poor helpless thing. He did not pinch + it, only because he dared not, lest it should cry. When he heard Clare + fall on the coals, and then heard him call up from the depth of the + cellar, he was greatly tempted to turn with it to the other end of the + house, and throw it in the pool, then make for the wall and the fields, + leaving Clare to shift for himself. But he durst not go near the pool, and + Clare would be sure to get out again and be after him! so he stood with + the hated creature in his unprotective arms. When Clare called for it, he + got into the shallow area, and pushed the baby through the window, + grasping the extreme of its garment, and letting it hang into the darkness + of the cellar, head downward. I believe then the baby was sick, for, a + moment after, and before Clare could get a hold of it, it began to cry. + The sound thrilled him with delight. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, the darling!—Can't you let her down a bit farther, Tommy?” he + said, with suppressed eagerness. + </p> + <p> + He had climbed on the heap of coals, and was stretching up his arms to + receive her. In the faint glimmer from the diffused light of the moon, he + could just distinguish the window, blocked up by Tommy; the baby he could + not see. + </p> + <p> + “No, I can't,” answered Tommy. “Catch! There!” + </p> + <p> + So saying he yielded to his spite, and waiting no sign of preparedness on + the part of Clare, let go his hold, and dropped the little one. It fell on + Clare and knocked him over; but he clasped it to him as he fell, and they + hurtled to the bottom of the coals without much damage. + </p> + <p> + “I have her!” he cried as he got up. “Now you come yourself, Tommy.” + </p> + <p> + He had known no baby but his lost sister, and thought of all babies as + girls. + </p> + <p> + “You'll catch me, won't you, Clare?” said Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “The thing you've done once you can do again! I can't set down the baby to + catch you!” replied the unsuspicious Clare, and turned to seek an exit + from the cellar. He had not had time yet to wonder how Tommy had got out. + </p> + <p> + Tommy came tumbling on the top of the coals: he dared not be left with the + water-but and the pool and the moon. + </p> + <p> + “Where are you, Clare?” he called. + </p> + <p> + Clare answered him from the top of the stone stair that led to the cellar, + and Tommy was soon at his heels. Going along a dark passage, where they + had to feel their way, they arrived at the kitchen. The loose outside + shutter belonged to it, and as it was open, a little of the moonlight came + in. The place looked dreary enough and cold enough with its damp + brick-floor and its rusty range; but at least they were out of the air, + and out of sight of the moon! If only they had some of that coal alight! + </p> + <p> + “I don't see as we're much better off!” said Tommy. “I'm as cold as pigs' + trotters!” + </p> + <p> + “Then what must baby be like!” said Clare, whose heart was brimful of + anxiety for his charge. It seemed to him he had never known misery till + now. Life or death for the baby—and he could do nothing! He was cold + enough himself, what with hunger, and the night, and the wet and deadly + cold little body in his arms; but whatever discomfort he felt, it seemed + not himself but the baby that was feeling it; he imputed it all to the + baby, and pitied the baby for the cold he felt himself. + </p> + <p> + “We needn't stay here, though,” he said. “There must be better places in + the house! Let's try and find a bedroom!” + </p> + <p> + “Come along!” responded Tommy. + </p> + <p> + They left the kitchen, and went into the next room. It seemed warmer, + because it had a wooden floor. There was hardly any light in it, but it + felt empty. They went up the stair. When they turned on the landing + half-way, they saw the moon shining in. They went into the first room they + came to. Such a bedroom!—larger and grander than any at the + parsonage! + </p> + <p> + “Oh baby! baby!” cried Clare, “now you'll live—won't you?” + </p> + <p> + He seemed to have his own Maly an infant again in his arms. The thought + that the place was not his, and that he might get into trouble by being + there, never came to him. Use was not theft! The room and its contents + were to him as the water and the fire which even pagans counted every man + bound to hand to his neighbour. There was the bed! Through all the cold + time it had been waiting for them! The counterpane was very dusty; and oh, + such moth-eaten blankets! But there were sheets under them, and they were + quite clean, though dingy with age! The moths—that is, their legs + and wings and dried-up bodies—flew out in clouds when they moved the + blankets. Not the less had they discovered Paradise! For the moths, they + must have found it an island of plum-cake! + </p> + <p> + I do not know the history of the house—how it came to be shut up + with so much in it. I only know it was itself shut up in chancery, and + chancery is full of moths and dust and worms. I believe nobody in the town + knew much about it—not even the thieves. It was of course said to be + haunted, which had doubtless done something for its protection. No one + knew how long it had stood thus deserted. Nobody thought of entering it, + or was aware that there was furniture in it. It was supposed to be + somebody's property, and that it was somebody's business to look after it: + whether it was looked after or not, nobody inquired. Happily for Clare and + the baby and Tommy, that was nobody's business. + </p> + <p> + With deft hands—for how often had he not seen his baby-sister + undressed!—Clare hurried off the infant's one garment, gently rubbed + her little body till it was quite dry, if not very clean, and laid her + tenderly in the heart of the blankets, among the remains and eggs and + grubs of the mothy creatures—they were not wild beasts, or even + stinging things—and covered her up, leaving a little opening for her + to breathe through. She had not cried since Clare took her; she was too + feeble to cry; but, alas, there was no question about feeding her, for he + had no food to give her, were she crying ever so much! He threw off his + clothes, and got into the mothy blankets beside her. In a few minutes he + began to glow, for there was a thick pile of woolly salvation atop of him. + He took the naked baby in his arms and held her close to his body, and + they grew warmer together. + </p> + <p> + “Now, Tommy,” he said, “you may take off your clothes, and get in on the + other side of me.” + </p> + <p> + Tommy did not need a second invitation, and in a moment they were all fast + asleep. A few months, even a few days before, it would have been a right + painful thing to Clare to lie so near a boy like Tommy, but suffering had + taken the edge off nicety and put it on humanity. The temple of the Lord + may need cleansing, but the temple of the Lord it is. Clare had in him + that same spirit which made <i>the</i> son of man go beyond the healingly + needful, and lay his hand—the Sinaitic manuscript says his <i>hands</i>—upon + the leper, where a word alone would have served for the leprosy: the hands + were for the man's heart. Repulsive danger lay in the contact, but the + flesh and bones were human, and very cold. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0025" id="link2HCH0025"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXV. A new quest. + </h2> + <p> + Though as comfortable as one could be who so sorely lacked food, Clare + slept lightly. His baby was heavy on his mind, and he woke very early—woke + at once to the anxious thought of a boy without food, money, or friends, + and with a hungry baby. He woke, however, with a new train of reasoning in + his mind. Babies could not work; babies always had their food given them; + therefore babies who hadn't food had a right to ask for it; babies + couldn't ask for it; therefore those who had the charge of them, and + hadn't food to give them, had a right to do the asking for them. He could + not beg for himself as long as he was able to ask for work; but for baby + it was his duty to beg, because she could not wait: she would not live + till he found work. If he got work that very day, he would have to work + the whole day before he got the money for it, and baby would be dead by + that time! He crept out, so as not to awake the sleepers, and put on his + clothes. They were not dry, but they would dry when the sun rose. He did + not at all like leaving his baby with Tommy, but what was he to do? She + might as well die of Tommy as of hunger! Perhaps it might be easier! + </p> + <p> + He thought over the nature of the boy, and what it would be best to say to + him. He saw what many genial persons are slow to see, that kindness, in + its natural shape, is to certain dispositions a great barrier in the way + of learning either love or duty. With multitudes, nothing but undiluted + fear or pain or shame can open the door for love to enter. + </p> + <p> + He searched the house for a medicine-bottle, such as he had seen plenty of + at the parsonage, and found two. He chose the smaller, lest size should + provoke disinclination. Then he woke Tommy, and said to him, + </p> + <p> + “Tommy, I'm going out to get baby's breakfast.” + </p> + <p> + “Ain't you going to give <i>me</i> any? Is the kid to have <i>everything</i>?” + </p> + <p> + “Tommy!” said Clare, with a steady look in his eyes that frightened him, + “your turn will come next. You won't die of want for a day or two yet. + I'll see to you as soon as I can. Only, remember, baby comes first! I'm + going to leave her with you. You needn't take her up. You're not able to + carry her. You would let her fall. But if, when I come home, I find + anything has happened to her, <i>I'll put you in the water-butt</i>—I + WILL. And I'll do it when the moon is in it.” + </p> + <p> + Tommy pulled a hideous face, and began to yell. Clare seized him by the + throat. + </p> + <p> + “Make that noise again, you rascal, and I'll choke you. If you're good to + baby while I'm away, I won't eat a mouthful till you've had some; if + you're not good to her, you know what will happen! You've got the thing in + your own hands!” + </p> + <p> + “She'll go an' do something I can't help, an' then you'll go for to drown + me!” + </p> + <p> + Again he began to howl, but Clare checked him as before. “If you wake her + up, I'll—” He had no words, and shook him for lack of any. “I see,” + he resumed, “I shall have to lock you up in the coal-cellar till I come + back! Here! come along!” + </p> + <p> + Tommy was quiet instantly, and fell to pleading. Clare lent a gracious + ear, and yielding to Tommy's protestations, left him with his treasure, + and set out on his quest. + </p> + <p> + He got out through the kitchen, the rustiness of the fastenings of its + door delaying him a little, and over the wall by the imprisoned door, + taking care to lift as little as possible of his person above the coping + as he crossed. He dared not go along the wall in the daylight, or get down + in the smith's yard; he dropped straight to the ground. + </p> + <p> + The country was level, and casting his eyes about, he saw, at no great + distance, what looked like a farmstead. He knew cows were milked early, + but did not know what time it was. Hoping anyhow to reach the place before + the milk was put away in the pans, he set out to run straight across the + fields. But he soon found he could not run, and had to drop into a walk. + </p> + <p> + When he got into the yard, he saw a young woman carrying a foaming pail of + milk across to the dairy. He ran to her, and addressed her with his usual + “Please, ma'am;” but the pail was heavy, and she kept on without answering + him. Clare followed her, and looking into the dairy, saw an elderly woman. + </p> + <p> + “Please, ma'am, could you afford me as much fresh milk as would fill that + bottle?” he said, showing it. + </p> + <p> + “Well, my man,” she answered pleasantly, “I think we might venture as far + without fear of the workhouse! But what on earth made you bring such a + thimble of a bottle as that?” + </p> + <p> + “I have no money to pay for it, you see, ma'am; and I thought a little + bottle would be better to beg with; it wouldn't be so hard on the farmer!” + </p> + <p> + “Bless the boy! Much good a drop of milk like that will do him!” said the + woman, turning to the girl “Is it for your mother's tea?” + </p> + <p> + “No, ma'am; it's for a baby—a very little baby, ma'am!—I think + it will hold enough,” he added, giving an anxious glance at the bottle in + his hand, “to keep her alive till I get work.” + </p> + <p> + The woman looked, and her heart was drawn to the boy who stood gazing at + her with his whole solemn, pathetic yet strong face—with his wide, + clear eyes, his decided nose, large and straight, his rather long, fine + mouth, trembling with eager anxiety, and his confident chin. She saw + hunger in his grimy cheeks; she saw that his manners were those of a + gentleman, and his clothes poor enough for any tramp, though evidently not + made for a tramp. She would have concluded him escaped from cruel + guardians, for she was a reader of <i>The Family Herald</i>; but that + would not account for the baby! The baby did not tally! + </p> + <p> + “How old's the baby?” she asked. + </p> + <p> + “I don't know, ma'am; she only came to us last night.” + </p> + <p> + “Who brought her?” + </p> + <p> + She imagined the boy a simpleton, and expected one of such answers as + inconvenient questions in natural history receive from nurses. + </p> + <p> + “I don't know, ma'am. I took her out of the water-butt.” + </p> + <p> + The thing grew bewildering. + </p> + <p> + “Who put her there?” + </p> + <p> + “I don't know, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + “Whose baby is she, then?” + </p> + <p> + “Mine, I think, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + “God bless the boy!” said the woman impatiently, and stared at him + speechless. + </p> + <p> + Her daughter in the meantime had filled the phial with new milk. She + handed it to him. He grasped it eagerly. Tears of joy came in his big + hungry eyes. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, <i>thank</i> you, ma'am!” he said. “But, please, would you tell me,” + he continued, looking from the one to the other, “how much water I must + put in the milk to make it good for baby? I know it wants water, but I + don't know how much!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, about half and half,” answered the elder woman. “'Ain't she got no + mother?” she resumed. + </p> + <p> + “I think she must have a mother, but I daresay she's a tramp,” answered + Clare. + </p> + <p> + “I don't want to give my good milk to a tramp!” she rejoined. + </p> + <p> + “<i>I</i>'m not a tramp, please, ma'am!—at least I wasn't till the + day before yesterday.” + </p> + <p> + The woman looked at him out of motherly eyes, and her heart swelled into + her bosom. + </p> + <p> + “Wouldn't you like some milk yourself?” she said. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, yes, ma'am!” answered Clare, with a deep sigh. + </p> + <p> + She filled a big cup from the warm milk in the pail, and held it out to + him. He took it as a man on the scaffold might a reprieve from death, half + lifted it to his lips, then let his hand sink. It trembled so, as he set + the cup down on a shelf beside him, that he spilled a little. He looked + ruefully at the drops on the brick floor. + </p> + <p> + “Please, ma'am, there's Tommy!” he faltered. + </p> + <p> + His promise to Tommy had sprung upon him like a fiery flying serpent. + </p> + <p> + “Tommy! I thought you said the baby was a girl?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, the baby's a girl; but there's Tommy as well! He's another of us.” + </p> + <p> + “Your brother, of course!” + </p> + <p> + “No, ma'am; I'm afraid he's a tramp. But there he is, you see, and I must + share with him!” + </p> + <p> + It grew more and more inexplicable! + </p> + <p> + A gruff, loud voice came from the yard. It was the farmer's. He was a + bitter-tempered man, and his dislike of tramps was almost hatred. His wife + and daughter knew that if he saw the boy he would be worse than rude to + him. + </p> + <p> + “There's the master!” cried the mother. “Drink, and make haste out of his + way.” + </p> + <p> + “If it's stealing,—” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Stealing! It's no stealing! The dairy's mine! I can give my milk where I + please!” + </p> + <p> + “Well, ma'am, if the milk's mine because you gave it me, it's not begging + to ask you to give me a piece of bread for it! I could take a share of + that to Tommy!” + </p> + <p> + “Run, Chris,” cried the mother, hurriedly; “take the innocent with you—round + outside the yard. Give him a hunch of bread, and let him go. For God's + sake don't let your father see him! Run, my boy, run! There's no time to + drink the milk now!” + </p> + <p> + She poured it back into the pail, and set the cup out of the way. + </p> + <p> + There was a little passage and another door, by which they left as the + farmer entered. The kick he would have given Clare with his heavy boot + would, in its consequences, have reached the baby too. The girl ran with + him to the back of the house. + </p> + <p> + “Wait a moment at that window,” she said. + </p> + <p> + Now whether it was loving-kindness all, or that she dared not take the + time to divide it, I cannot tell, but she handed Clare a whole loaf, and + that a good big one, of home-made bread, and disappeared before he could + thank her, telling him to run for his life. + </p> + <p> + He was able now. With the farmer behind, and the hungry ones before him, + he <i>must</i> run; and with the phial in his pocket and the loaf in his + hands, he <i>could</i> run. Happily the farmer did not catch sight of him. + His wife took care he should not. I believe, indeed, she got up a + brand-new quarrel with him on the spur of the moment, that he might not + have a chance. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0026" id="link2HCH0026"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXVI. A new entrance. + </h2> + <p> + Clare sped jubilant. But soon came a check to his jubilation: it was one + thing to drop from the wall, and quite another to climb to the top of it + without the help of the door! The same moment he heard the clink of the + smith's hammer on his anvil, and to go by his yard in daylight would be to + risk too much! For what would become of them if their retreat was + discovered! He stood at the foot of the brick precipice, and stared up + with helpless eyes and failing strength. Baby was inside, hungry, and with + no better nurse than ill conditioned Tommy; her milk was in his pocket, + Tommy's bread in his hand, the insurmountable wall between him and them! + He had the daylight now, however, and there was hardly any one about: + perhaps he could find another entrance! Round the outside of the wall, + therefore, like the Midianite in the rather comical hymn, did Clare prowl + and prowl. But the wall rose straight and much too smooth wherever he + looked. Searching its face he went all along the bottom of the garden, and + then up the narrow lane between it and the garden of the next house, with + increasing fear that there was no way but by the smith's yard, and no + choice but risk it. + </p> + <p> + A dozen yards or so, however, from the end of the lane, where it took a + sharp turn before entering the street, he spied an opening in the wall—the + same from which, the night before, Tommy had returned with such a + frightened face. Clare went through, and found a narrow passage running to + the left for a short distance between two walls. At the end, half on one + side, half on the other of the second wall, lay the well that had + terrified Tommy. The wall crossed it with a low arch. On the further side + of the well was a third wall, with a space of about two feet and a half + between it and the side of the round well. Through that wall there might + be a door!—or, if not, there might be some way of getting over it! + To cross the well would be awkward, but he must do it! He tied the loaf in + his pocket-handkerchief—he was far past fastidiousness, and Tommy + knew neither the word nor the thing—and knotted the ends of it round + his neck. But his chief anxiety was not to break the bottle in his + jacket-pocket. He got on his knees on the parapet. How deep and dark the + water looked! For a moment he felt a fear of it something like Tommy's. + How was he to cross the awful gulf? It was not like a free jump; he was + hemmed in before and behind, and overhead also. But the baby drew him over + the well, as the name of Beatrice drew Dante through the fire. The baby + was waiting for him, and it had to be done! He made a cat-leap through + beneath the arch, reaching out with his hands and catching at the parapet + beyond. He did catch it, just enough of it to hold on by, so that his body + did not follow his legs into the water. Oh, how cold they found it after + his run! He held on, strained and heaved up, made a great reach across the + width of the parapet with one hand, laid hold of its outer edge, made good + his grasp on it, and drew himself out of the water, and out of the well. + </p> + <p> + He was in a narrow space, closed in with walls much higher than his head, + out of which he saw no way but that by which he had come in—across + the fearful well, that seemed, so dark was its water, to go down and down + for ever. + </p> + <p> + He felt in his pocket. If then he had found baby's bottle broken, I doubt + if Clare would ever have got out of the place, except by the door into the + next world. What little strength he had was nearly gone, and I think it + would then have gone quite. But the bottle was safe and his courage came + back. + </p> + <p> + He examined his position, and presently saw that the narrowness of his + threatened prison would make it no prison at all. He found that, by + leaning his back against one wall, pushing his feet against the opposite + wall, and making of the third wall a rack for his shoulder, he could worm + himself slowly up. It was a task for a strong man, and Clare, though + strong for his years, was not at that moment strong. But there was the + baby waiting, and here was her milk! He fell to, and, with an agony of + exertion, wriggled himself at last to the top—so exhausted that he + all but fell over on the other side. He pulled himself together, and + dropped at once into, the garden. Happier boy than Clare was not in all + England then. Hunger, wet, incipient nakedness, for he had torn his + clothes badly, were nowhere. Baby was within his reach, and the milk + within baby's! + </p> + <p> + He ran, dripping like a spaniel, to find her, and shot up the stair to the + room that held his treasure. To his joy he found both Tommy and the baby + fast asleep, Tommy tired out with the weary tramping of the day before, + and the baby still under the influence of the opiate her mother had given + her to make her drown quietly. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0027" id="link2HCH0027"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXVII. The baby has her breakfast. + </h2> + <p> + He waked Tommy, and showed him the loaf. Tommy sprang from his lair and + snatched at it. + </p> + <p> + “No, Tommy,” said Clare, drawing back, “I can't trust you! You would eat + it all; and if I died of hunger, what would become of baby, left alone + with you? I don't feel at all sure you wouldn't eat <i>her</i>!” + </p> + <p> + Baby started a feeble whimper. + </p> + <p> + “You must wait now till I've attended to her,” continued Clare. “If you + had got up quietly without waking her, I would have given you your share + at once.” + </p> + <p> + As he spoke, he pulled a blanket off the bed to wrap her in, and made + haste to take her up. A series of difficulties followed, which I will + leave to the imagination of mothers and aunts, and nurses in general—the + worst being that there was no warm water to wash her in, and cold water + would be worse than dangerous after what she had gone through with it the + night before. Clare comforted himself that washing was a thing + non-essential to existence, however desirable for well-being. + </p> + <p> + Then came a more serious difficulty: the milk must be mixed with water, + and water as cold as Clare's legs would kill the drug-dazed shred of + humanity! What was to be done? It would be equally dangerous to give her + the strong milk of a cow undiluted. There was but one way: he must feed + her as do the pigeons. First, however, he must have water! The well was + almost inaccessible: to get to it and return would fearfully waste + life-precious time! The rain-water in the little pool must serve the + necessity! It was preferable to that in the butt! + </p> + <p> + Until many years after, it did not occur to Clare as strange that there + should be even a drop of water in that water-butt. Whence was it fed? + There was no roof near, from which the rain might run into it. If there + had ever been a pipe to supply it, surely, in a house so long forsaken, + its continuity must have given way One always sees such barrels empty, + dry, and cracked: this one was apparently known to be full of water, for + what woman in her senses, however inferior those senses, would throw her + child into an empty butt! How did it happen to be full? Clare was almost + driven to the conclusion that it had been filled for the evil purpose to + which it was that night put. Against this was the fact that it would not + have been easy to fill such a huge vessel by hand. I suggested that the + blacksmith and his predecessors might have used it for the purposes of the + forge, and kept it and its feeder in repair. Mr. Skymer endeavoured + repeatedly to find out what had become of the blacksmith, but never with + any approach to success; the probability being that he had left the world + long before his natural time, by disease engendered or quarrel occasioned + through his drunkenness. + </p> + <p> + Clare laid the baby down, and fetched water from the pool. Then he mixed + the milk with what seemed the right quantity, again took the baby up, who + had been whimpering a little now and then all the time, laid a blanket, + several times folded, on his wet knees, and laid her in her blanket upon + it. These preparations made, he took a small mouthful of the milk and + water, and held it until it grew warm. It was the only way, I condescend + to remind any such reader as may think it proper to be disgusted. When + then he put his mouth to the baby's, careful not to let too much go at + once, they managed so between them that she successfully appropriated the + mouthful. It was followed by a second, a third, and more, until, to + Clare's delight, the child seemed satisfied, leaving some of the precious + fluid for another meal. He put her in the bed again, and covered her up + warm. All the time, Tommy had been watching the loaf with the eyes of a + wild beast. + </p> + <p> + “Now, Tommy,” said Clare, “how much of this loaf do you think you ought to + have?” + </p> + <p> + “Half, of course!” answered Tommy boldly, with perfect conviction of his + fairness, and pride in the same. + </p> + <p> + “Are you as big as I am?” + </p> + <p> + Tommy held his peace. + </p> + <p> + “You ain't half as big!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “I'm a bloomin' lot hungrier!” growled Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “You had eggs last night, and I had none!” + </p> + <p> + “That wurn't my fault!” + </p> + <p> + “What did you do to get this bread?” + </p> + <p> + “I staid at home with baby.” + </p> + <p> + “That's true,” answered Clare. “But,” he went on, “suppose a horse and a + pony had got to divide their food between them, would the pony have a + right to half? Wouldn't the horse, being bigger, want more to keep him + alive than the pony?” + </p> + <p> + “Don't know,” said Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “But you shall have the half,” continued Clare; “only I hope, after this, + when you get anything given to you, you'll divide it with me. I try to be + fair, and I want you to be fair.” + </p> + <p> + Tommy made no reply. He did not trouble himself about fair play; he wanted + all he could get—like most people; though, thank God, I know a few + far more anxious to give than to receive fair play. Such men, be they + noblemen or tradesmen, I worship. + </p> + <p> + Clare carefully divided the loaf, and after due deliberation, handed Tommy + that which seemed the bigger half. Without a word of acknowledgment, Tommy + fell upon it like a terrier. He would love Clare in a little while when he + had something more to give—but stomach before heart with Tommy! His + sort is well represented in every rank. There are not many who can at the + same time both love and be hungry. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0028" id="link2HCH0028"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXVIII. Treachery. + </h2> + <p> + “Now, Tommy,” said Clare, having eaten his half loaf, “I'm going out to + look for work, and you must take care of baby. You're not to feed her—you + would only choke her, and waste the good milk.” + </p> + <p> + “I want to go out too,” said Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “To see what you can pick up, I suppose?” + </p> + <p> + “That's my business.” + </p> + <p> + “I fancy it mine while you are with me. If you don't take care of baby and + be good to her, I'll put you in the water-butt I took her out of—as + sure as you ain't in it now!” + </p> + <p> + “That you shan't!” cried Tommy; “I'll bite first!” + </p> + <p> + “I'll tie your hands and feet, and put a stick in your mouth,” said Clare. + “So you'd better mind.” + </p> + <p> + “I want to go with you!” whimpered Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “You can't. You're to stop and look after baby. I won't be away longer + than I can help; you may be sure of that.” + </p> + <p> + With repeated injunctions to him not to leave the room, Clare went. + </p> + <p> + Before going quite, however, he must arrange for returning. To swarm up + between the two walls as he had done before, would be to bid good-bye to + his jacket at least, and he knew how appearances were already against him. + Spying about for whatever might serve his purpose, he caught sight of an + old garden-roller, and was making for it, when Tommy, never doubting he + was gone, came whistling round the corner of the house with his hands in + his pocket-holes, and an impudent air of independence. Clare away, he was + a lord in his own eyes! He could kill the baby when he pleased! Plainly + his mood was, “He thinks I'm going to do as he tells me! Not if I knows + it!” Clare saw him before he saw Clare, and rushed at him with a roar. + </p> + <p> + “You thought I was gone!” he cried. “I told you not to leave the room! + Come along to the water-butt!” + </p> + <p> + Tommy shivered when he heard him, and gave a shriek when he saw him + coming. He shook till his teeth chattered. But terror not always paralyzes + instinct in the wild animal. As Clare came running, he took one step + toward him, and dropped on the ground at his feet. Clare shot away over + his head, struck his own against a tree, and lay for a minute stunned. + Tommy's success was greater than he had hoped. He scudded into the house, + and closed and bolted the door to the kitchen. + </p> + <p> + When Clare came to himself, he found he had a cut on his head. It would + never do to go asking for work with a bloody face! The little pool served + at once for basin and mirror, and while he washed he thought. + </p> + <p> + He had no inclination to punish Tommy for the trick he had played him; he + had but done after his kind! It would serve a good end too: Tommy would + imagine him lurking about to have his revenge, and would not venture his + nose out. He discovered afterward that the little wretch had made fast the + cellar-door, so that, if he had entered that way, he would have been + caught in a trap, and unable to go or return. + </p> + <p> + He got the iron roller to the foot of the wall, where he had come over the + night before, and where now first he perceived there had once been a door; + managed, with its broken handle for a lever, to set it up on end, filled + it with earth, and heaped a mound of earth about it to steady it, placed a + few broken tiles and sherds of chimney-pots upon it, and from this rickety + perch found he could reach the top easily. + </p> + <p> + The next thing was to arrange for getting up from the other side. For this + he threw over earth and stones and whatever rubbish came to his hand, the + sole quality required in his material being, that it should serve to lift + him any fraction of an inch higher. The space was so narrow that his mound + did not require to be sustained by the width of its base except in one + direction; everywhere else the walls kept in the heap, and he made good + speed. At length he descended by it, sure of being able to get up again. + </p> + <p> + He had been gone an hour before Tommy dared again leave the room where the + baby was. He had planned what to do if Clare got into it: he would + threaten, if he came a step nearer, to kill the baby! But if he had him in + the coal-cellar, he would make his own conditions! A tramp would not keep + a promise, but Clare would! and until he promised not to touch him, he + should not come out—not if he died of hunger! + </p> + <p> + At length he could bear imprisonment no longer. He opened the room-door + with the caution of one who thought a tiger might be lying against it. He + saw no one, and crept out with half steps. By slow degrees, interrupted by + many an inroad of terror and many a swift retreat, he got down the stair + and out into the garden; whence, after closest search, he was at length + satisfied his enemy had departed. For a time he was his own master! To one + like Tommy—and such are not rare—it is a fine thing to be his + own master. But the same person who is the master is the servant—and + what a master to serve! Tommy, however, was quite satisfied with both + master and servant, for both were himself. What was he to do? Go after + something to eat, of course! He would be back long before Clare! He had + gone to look for work—and who would give <i>him</i> work? If Tommy + were as big as Clare, lots of people would give him work! But catch him + working! Not if he knew it!—not Tommy! + </p> + <p> + Never till she was grown up, never, indeed, until she was a middle-aged + woman and Mr. Skymer's housekeeper, did the baby know in what danger she + was that morning, alone with surnameless Tommy. + </p> + <p> + His first sense of relation to any creature too weak to protect itself, + was the consciousness of power to torment that creature. But in this case + the exercise of the power brought him into another relation, one with the + water-butt! He went back to the room where the child lay in her blankets + like a human chrysalis, and stood for a moment regarding her with a hatred + far from mild: was he actually expected to give time and personal notice + to that contemptible thing lying there unable to move? <i>He</i> wasn't a + girl or an old woman! He must go and get something to eat! that was what a + man was for! Better twist her neck at once and go! + </p> + <p> + But he could not forget the water-butt—proximate mother of the + child. Its idea came sliding into Tommy's range, grew and grew upon Tommy, + came nearer and nearer, until the baby was nowhere, and nothing in the + world but the water-butt. His consciousness was possessed with it. It was + preparing to swallow him in its loathsome deep! All at once it jumped back + from him, and stood motionless by the side of the wall. Now was his + chance! Now he must mizzle! Not a moment longer would he stop in the same + place with the horrible thing! + </p> + <p> + But the baby! Clare would bring him back and put him in the butt! No, he + wouldn't! What harm would come to the brat? She was not able to roll + herself off the bed! She could do nothing but go to sleep again! Out he + must and would go! He wanted something to eat! He would be in again long + before Clare could get back! + </p> + <p> + He left the room and the house, ran down the garden, scrambled up the + door, got on the top of the wall, and dropped into the waste land behind + it—nor once thought that the only way back was by the very jaws of + the water-butt. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0029" id="link2HCH0029"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXIX. The baker. + </h2> + <p> + Clare went over the wall and the well without a notion of what he was + going to do, except look for work. He had eaten half a loaf, and now drew + in his cap some water from the well and drank. He felt better than any + moment since leaving the farm. He was full of hope. + </p> + <p> + All his life he had never been other than hopeful. To the human being hope + is as natural as hunger; yet how few there are that hope as they hunger! + Men are so proud of being small, that one wonders to what pitch their + conceit will have arrived by the time they are nothing at all. They are + proud that they love but a little, believe less, and hope for nothing. + Every fool prides himself on not being such a fool as believe what would + make a man of him. For dread of being taken in, he takes himself in + ridiculously. The man who keeps on trying to do his duty, finds a brighter + and brighter gleam issue, as he walks, from the lantern of his hope. + </p> + <p> + Clare was just breaking into a song he had heard his mother sing to his + sister, when he was checked by the sight of a long skinny mongrel like a + hairy worm, that lay cowering and shivering beside a heap of ashes put + down for the dust-cart—such a dry hopeless heap that the famished + little dog did not care to search it: some little warmth in it, I presume, + had kept him near it. Clare's own indigence made him the more sorry for + the indigent, and he felt very sorry for this member of the family; but he + had neither work nor alms to give him, therefore strode on. The dog looked + wistfully after him, as if recognizing one of his own sort, one that would + help him if he could, but did not follow him. + </p> + <p> + A hundred yards further, Clare came to a baker's shop. It was the first he + felt inclined to enter, and he went in. He did not know it was the shop + from whose cart Tommy had pilfered. A thin-faced, bilious-looking, elderly + man stood behind the counter. + </p> + <p> + “Well, boy, what do you want?” he said in a low, sad, severe, but not + unkindly voice. + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir,” answered Clare, “I want something to do, and I thought + perhaps you could help me.” + </p> + <p> + “What can you do?” + </p> + <p> + “Not much, but I can <i>try</i> to do anything.” + </p> + <p> + “Have you ever learned to do anything?” + </p> + <p> + “I've been working on a farm for the last six months. Before that I went + to school.” + </p> + <p> + “Why didn't you go on going to school?” + </p> + <p> + “Because my father and mother died.” + </p> + <p> + “What was your father?” + </p> + <p> + “A parson.” + </p> + <p> + “Why did you leave the farm?” + </p> + <p> + “Because they didn't want me. The mistress didn't like me.” + </p> + <p> + “I dare say she had her reasons!” + </p> + <p> + “I don't know, sir; she didn't seem to like anything I did. My mother used + to say, 'Well done, Clare!' my mistress never said 'Well done!”' + </p> + <p> + “So the farmer sent you away?” + </p> + <p> + “No, sir; but he boxed my ears for something—I don't now remember + what.” + </p> + <p> + “I dare say you deserved it!” + </p> + <p> + “Perhaps I did; I don't know; he never did it before.” + </p> + <p> + “If you deserved it, you had no right to run away for that.” + </p> + <p> + The baker taught in a Sunday-school, and was a good teacher, able to make + a class mind him. + </p> + <p> + “I didn't run away for that, sir; I ran away because he was tired of me. I + couldn't stay to make him uncomfortable! He had been very kind to me; I + fancy it was mistress made him change. I've been thinking a good deal + about it, and that's how it looks to me. I'm very sorry not to have him or + the creatures any more.” + </p> + <p> + “What creatures?” + </p> + <p> + “The bull, and the horses, and the cows, and the pigs—all the + creatures about the farm. They were my friends. I shall see them all again + somewhere!” + </p> + <p> + He gave a great sigh. + </p> + <p> + “What do you mean by that?” asked the baker. + </p> + <p> + “I hardly know what I mean,” answered Clare. + </p> + <p> + “When I'm loving anybody I always feel I shall see that person again some + time, I don't know when—somewhere, I don't know where.” + </p> + <p> + “That don't apply to the lower animals; it's nothing but a foolish + imagination,” said the baker. + </p> + <p> + “But if I love them!” suggested Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Love a bull, or a horse, or a pig! You can't!” asserted the baker. + </p> + <p> + “But I <i>do</i>,” rejoined Clare. “I love my father and mother much more + than when they were alive!” + </p> + <p> + “What has that to do with it?” returned the baker. + </p> + <p> + “That I know I love my father and mother, and I know I love that fierce + bull that would always do what I told him, and that dear old horse that + was almost past work, and was always ready to do his best.—I'm + afraid they've killed him by now!” he added, with another sigh. + </p> + <p> + “But beasts 'ain't got souls, and you can't love them. And if you could, + that's no reason why you should see them again.” + </p> + <p> + “I <i>do</i> love them, and perhaps they have souls!” rejoined Clare. + </p> + <p> + “You mustn't believe that! It's quite shocking. It's nowhere in the + Bible.” + </p> + <p> + “Is everything that is not in the Bible shocking, sir?” + </p> + <p> + “Well, I won't say that; but you're not to believe it.” + </p> + <p> + “I suppose you don't like animals, sir! Are you afraid of their going to + the same place as you when they die?” + </p> + <p> + “I wouldn't have a boy about me that held such an unscriptural notion! The + Bible says—the spirit of a man that goeth upward, and the spirit of + a beast that goeth downward!” + </p> + <p> + “Is that in the Bible, sir?” + </p> + <p> + “It is,” answered the baker with satisfaction, thinking he had proved his + point. + </p> + <p> + “I'm so glad!” returned Clare. “I didn't know there was anything about it + in the Bible! Then when I die I shall only have to go down somewhere, and + look for them till I find them!” + </p> + <p> + The baker was silenced for a moment. + </p> + <p> + “It's flat atheism!” he cried. “Get out of my shop! What is the world + coming to!” + </p> + <p> + Clare turned and went out. + </p> + <p> + But though a bilious, the baker was not an unreasonable or unjust man + except when what he had been used to believe all his life was + contradicted. Clare had not yet shut the door when he repented. He was a + good man, though not quite in the secret of the universe. He vaulted over + the counter, and opened the door with such a ringing of its appended bell + as made heavy-hearted Clare turn before he heard his voice. The long spare + white figure appeared on the threshold, framed in the doorway. + </p> + <p> + “Hi!” it shouted. + </p> + <p> + Clare went meekly back. + </p> + <p> + “I've just remembered hearing—but mind I <i>know</i> nothing, and + pledge myself to nothing——” + </p> + <p> + He paused. + </p> + <p> + “I didn't say I was <i>sure</i> about it,” returned Clare, thinking he + referred to the fate of the animals, “but I fear I'm to blame for not + being sure.” + </p> + <p> + “Come, come!” said the baker, with a twist of his mouth that expressed + disgust, “hold your tongue, and listen to me.—I did hear, as I was + saying, that Mr. Maidstone, down the town, had one of his errand-boys laid + up with scarlet fever. I'll take you to him, if you like. Perhaps he'll + have you,—though I can't say you look respectable!” + </p> + <p> + “I 'ain't had much chance since I left home, sir. I had a bit of soap, but——” + </p> + <p> + He bethought him that he had better say nothing about his family. Tommy + had picked his pocket of the soap the night before, and tried to eat it, + and Clare had hidden it away: he wanted it to wash the baby with as soon + as he could get some warm water; but when he went to find it to wash his + own face, it was gone. He suspected Tommy, but before long he had terrible + ground for a different surmise. + </p> + <p> + “You see, sir,” he resumed, “I had other things to think of. When your + tummy's empty, you don't think about the rest of you—do you, sir?” + </p> + <p> + The baker could not remember having ever been more than decently, + healthily hungry in his life; and here he had been rough on a well-bred + boy too hungry to wash his face! Perhaps the word <i>one of these little + ones</i> came to him. He had some regard for him who spoke it, though he + did talk more about him on Sundays than obey him in the days between. + </p> + <p> + “I don't know, my boy,” he answered. “Would you like a piece of bread?” + </p> + <p> + “I'm not much in want of it at this moment,” replied Clare, “but I should + be greatly obliged if you would let me call for it by and by. You see, + sir, when a man has no work, he can't help having no money!” + </p> + <p> + “A man!” thought the baker. “God pity you, poor monkey!” + </p> + <p> + He called to some one to mind the shop, removed his apron and put on a + coat, shut the door, and went down the street with Clare. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0030" id="link2HCH0030"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXX. The draper. + </h2> + <p> + At the shop of a draper and haberdasher, where one might buy almost + anything sold, Clare's new friend stopped and walked in. He asked to see + Mr. Maidstone, and a shopman went to fetch him from behind. He came out + into the public floor. + </p> + <p> + “I heard you were in want of a boy, sir,” said the baker, who carried + himself as in the presence of a superior; and certainly fine clothes and a + gold chain and ring did what they could to make the draper superior to the + baker. + </p> + <p> + “Hm!” said Mr. Maidstone, looking with contempt at Clare. + </p> + <p> + “I rather liked the look of this poor boy, and ventured to bring him on + approval,” continued the baker timidly. “He ain't much to look at, I + confess!” + </p> + <p> + “Hm!” said the draper again. “He don't look promising!” + </p> + <p> + “He don't. But I think he means performing,” said the baker, with a wan + smile. + </p> + <p> + “Donnow, I'm sure! If he 'appened to wash his face, I could tell better!” + </p> + <p> + Clare thought he had washed it pretty well that morning because of his + cut, though he had, to be sure, done it without soap, and had been at + rather dirty work since! + </p> + <p> + “He says he's been too hungry to wash his face,” answered the baker. + </p> + <p> + “Didn't 'ave his 'ot water in time, I suppose!—Will you answer for + him, Mr. Ball?” + </p> + <p> + “I can't, Mr. Maidstone—not one way or another. I simply was taken + with him. I know nothing about him.” + </p> + <p> + Here one of the shopmen came up to his master, and said, + </p> + <p> + “I heard Mr. Ball's own man yesterday accuse this very boy of taking a + loaf from his cart.” + </p> + <p> + “Yesterday!” thought Clare; “it seems a week ago!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh! this is the boy, is it?” said the baker. “You see I didn't know him! + All the same, I don't believe he took the loaf.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed I didn't, sir! Another boy took it who didn't know better, and I + took it from him, and was putting it back on the cart when the man turned + round and saw me, and wouldn't listen to a word I said. But a working-man + believed me, and bought the loaf, and gave it between us.” + </p> + <p> + “A likely story!” said the draper. + </p> + <p> + “I've heard that much,” said the baker, “and I believe it. At least I have + no reason to believe my man against him, Mr. Maidstone. That same night I + discovered he had been cheating me to a merry tune. I discharged him this + morning.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, he certainly don't look a respectable boy,” said the draper, who + naturally, being all surface himself, could read no deeper than clothes; + “but I'm greatly in want of one to carry out parcels, and I don't mind if + I try him. If he do steal anything, he'll be caught within the hour!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, thank you, sir!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “You shall have sixpence a day,” Mr. Maidstone continued, “—not a + penny more till I'm sure you're an honest boy.” + </p> + <p> + “Thank you, sir,” iterated Clare. “Please may I run home first? I won't be + long. I 'ain't got any other clothes, but——” + </p> + <p> + “Hold your long tongue. Don't let me hear it wagging in my establishment. + Go and wash your face and hands.” Clare turned to the baker. + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir,” he said softly, “may I go back with you and get the piece + of bread?” + </p> + <p> + “What! begging already!” cried Mr. Maidstone. + </p> + <p> + “No, no, sir,” interposed the baker. “I promised him a piece of bread. He + did not ask for it.” + </p> + <p> + The good man was pleased at his success, and began to regard Clare with + the favour that springs in the heart of him who has done a good turn to + another through a third. Had he helped him out of his own pocket, he might + not have been so much pleased. But there had been no loss, and there was + no risk! He had beside shown his influence with a superior! + </p> + <p> + “I am so much obliged to you, sir!” said Clare as they went away together. + “I cannot tell you how much!” + </p> + <p> + He was tempted to open his heart and reveal the fact that three people + would live on the sixpence a day which the baker's kindness had procured + him, but prudence was fast coming frontward, and he saw that no one must + know that they were in that house! If it were known, they would probably + be turned out at once, which would go far to be fatal to them as a family. + For, if he had to pay for lodgings, were it no more than the tramps paid + Tommy's grandmother, sixpence a day would not suffice for bare shelter. So + he held his tongue. + </p> + <p> + “Thank me by minding Mr. Maidstone's interests,” returned his benefactor. + “If you don't do well by him, the blame will come upon me.” + </p> + <p> + “I will be very careful, sir,” answered Clare, who was too full of honesty + to think of being honest; he thought only of minding orders. + </p> + <p> + They reached the shop; the baker gave him a small loaf, and he hurried + home with it The joy in his heart, spread over the days since he left the + farm, would have given each a fair amount of gladness. + </p> + <p> + Taking heed that no one saw him, he darted through the passage to the + well, got across it better this time, rushed over the wall like a cat, + fell on the other side from the unsteadiness of his potsherds, rose and + hurried into the house, with the feeble wail of his baby in his ears. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0031" id="link2HCH0031"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXXI. An addition to the family. + </h2> + <p> + The door to the kitchen was open: Tommy must be in the garden again! When + he reached the nursery, as he called it to himself, he found the baby as + he had left her, but moaning and wailing piteously. She looked as if she + had cried till she was worn out. He threw down the clothes to take her. A + great rat sprang from the bed. On one of the tiny feet the long thin toes + were bleeding and raw. The same instant arose a loud scampering and + scuffling and squealing in the room. Clare's heart quivered. He thought it + was a whole army of rats. He was not a bit afraid of them himself, but + assuredly they were not company for baby! Already they had smelt food in + the house, and come in a swarm! What was to be done with the little one? + If he stayed at home with her, she must die of hunger; if he left her + alone, the rats would eat her! They had begun already! Oh, that wretch, + Tommy! Into the water—but he should go! + </p> + <p> + I hope their friends will not take it ill that, all his life after, Clare + felt less kindly disposed toward rats than toward the rest of the + creatures of God. + </p> + <p> + But things were not nearly so bad as Clare thought: the scuffling came + from quite another cause. It suddenly ceased, and a sharp scream followed. + Clare turned with the baby in his arms. Almost at his feet, gazing up at + him, the rat hanging limp from his jaws, stood the little castaway mongrel + he had seen in the morning, his eyes flaming, and his tail wagging with + wild homage and the delight of presenting the rat to one he would fain + make his master. + </p> + <p> + “You darling!” cried Clare, and meant the dog this time, not the baby. The + animal dropped the dead rat at his feet, and glared, and wagged, and + looked hunger incarnate, but would not touch the rat until Clare told him + to take it. Then he retired with it to a corner, and made a rapid meal of + it. + </p> + <p> + He had seen Clare pass the second time, had doubtless noted that now he + carried a loaf, and had followed him in humble hope. Clare was too much + occupied with his own joy to perceive him, else he would certainly have + given him a little peeling or two from the outside of the bread. But it + was decreed that the dog should have the honour of rendering the first + service. Clare was not to do <i>all</i> the benevolences. + </p> + <p> + What a happy day it had been for him! It was a day to be remembered for + ever! He had work! he had sixpence a day! he had had a present of milk for + the baby, and two presents of bread—one a small, and one a large + loaf! And now here was a dog! A dog was more than many meals! The family + was four now! A baby, and a dog to take care of the baby!—It was + heavenly! + </p> + <p> + He made haste and gave his baby what milk and water was left. Then he + washed her poor torn foot, wrapped it in a pillow-case, for he would not + tear anything, and laid her in the bed. Next he cut a good big crust from + the loaf and gave it to the dog, who ate it as if the rat were nowhere. + The rest he put in a drawer. Then he washed his face and hands—as + well as he could without soap. After that, he took the dog, talked to him + a little, laid him on the bed beside the baby and talked to him again, + telling him plainly, and impressing upon him, that his business was the + care of the baby; that he must give himself up to her; that he must watch + and tend, and, if needful, fight for the little one. When at length he + left him, it was evident to Clare, by the solemnity of the dog's face, + that he understood his duty thoroughly. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0032" id="link2HCH0032"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXXII. Shop and baby. + </h2> + <p> + Once clear of the well and the wall, Clare set off running like a + gaze-hound. Such was the change produced in him by joy and the + satisfaction of hope, that when he entered the shop, no one at first knew + him. His face was as the face of an angel, and none the less beautiful + that it shone above ragged garments. But Mr. Maidstone, the moment he saw + him, and before he had time to recognize him, turned from the boy with + dislike. + </p> + <p> + “What a fool the beggar looks!” he said to himself;—then aloud to + one of the young men, “Hand over that parcel of sheets.—Here, you!—what's + your name?” + </p> + <p> + “Clare, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “I declare against it!” he rejoined, with a coarse laugh of pleasure at + his own fancied wit. “I shall call you Jack!” + </p> + <p> + “Very well, sir!” + </p> + <p> + “Don't you talk.—Here, Jack, take this parcel to Mrs. Trueman's. + You'll see the address on it.—And look sharp.—You can read, + can't you?” + </p> + <p> + The people in the shop stood looking on, some pitifully, all curiously, + for the parcel was of considerable size, and linen is heavy, while the boy + looked pale and thin. But Clare was strong for his age, and present joy + made up for past want. He scarcely looked at the parcel which the draper + proceeded to lay on his shoulder, stooped a little as he felt its weight, + heaved it a little to adjust its balance, and holding it in its place with + one hand, started for the door, which the master himself held open for + him. + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir, which way do I turn?” he asked. + </p> + <p> + “To the left,” answered Mr. Maidstone. “Ask your way as you go.” + </p> + <p> + Clare forgot that he had heard only the lady's name. Her address was on + the parcel, no doubt, but if he dropped it to look, he could not get it up + again by himself. A little way on, therefore, meeting a boy about his own + age returning from school, he asked him to be kind enough to read the + address on his back and direct him. The boy read it aloud, but gave him + false instructions for finding the place. Clare walked and walked until + the weight became almost unendurable, and at last, though loath, concluded + that the boy must have deceived him. He asked again, but this time of a + lady. She took pains not only to tell him right, but to make him + understand right: she was pleased with the tired gentle face that looked + up from beneath the heavy burden. Perhaps she thought of the proud souls + growing pure of their pride, in Dante's <i>Purgatorio</i>. Following her + directions, he needed no further questioning to find the house. But it was + hours after the burden was gone from his shoulder before it was rid of the + phantom of its weight. + </p> + <p> + His master rated him for having been so long, and would not permit him to + explain his delay, ordering him to hold his tongue and not answer back; + but the rest of his day's work was lighter; there was no other heavy + parcel to send out. There were so many smaller ones, however, that, by the + time they were all delivered, he had gained something more than a general + idea of how the streets lay, and was a weary wight when, with the + four-pence his master hesitated to give him on the ground that he was + doubtful of his character, he set out at last, walking soberly enough now, + to spend it at Mr. Ball's and the milk-shop. Of the former he bought a + stale three-penny loaf, and the baker added a piece to make up the weight. + Clare took this for liberality, and returned hearty thanks, which Mr. + Ball, I am sorry to say, was not man enough to repudiate. The other penny + he laid out on milk—but oh, how inferior it was to that the farmer's + wife had given him! The milk-woman, however, not ungraciously granted him + the two matches he begged for. + </p> + <p> + On his way to baby, he almost hoped Tommy would not return: he would + gladly be saved putting him in the water-butt! + </p> + <p> + He forgot him again as he drew near the nursery, and for a long while + after he reached it. He found the infant and the dog lying as he had left + them. The only sign that either had moved was the strange cleanness of the + tiny gray face which Clare had not ventured to wash. It gave indubitable + evidence that the dog had been licking it more than a little—probably + every few minutes since he was left curate in charge. + </p> + <p> + And now Clare did with deliberation a thing for which his sensitive + conscience not unfrequently reproached him afterward. His defence was, + that he had hurt nobody, and had kept baby alive by it. Having in his mind + revolved the matter many a time that day, he got some sticks together from + the garden, and with one of the precious matches lighted a small fire of + coals that were not his own, and for which he could merely hope one day to + restore amends. But baby! Baby was more than coals! He filled a rusty + kettle with water, and while it was growing hot on the fire, such was his + fear lest the smoke should betray them, that he ran out every other minute + to see how much was coming from the chimney. + </p> + <p> + While the fire was busy heating the water, he was busier preparing a + bottle for baby—making a hole through the cork of a phial, putting + the broken stem of a clean tobacco pipe he had found in the street through + the hole, tying a small lump of cotton wool over the end of the pipe-stem, + and covering that with a piece of his pocket-handkerchief, carefully + washed with the brown Windsor soap, his mother's last present. For the day + held yet another gladness: in looking for a kettle he had found the soap—which + probably the rat had carried away and hidden before finding baby. Through + the pipe-stem and the wool and the handkerchief he could without + difficulty draw water, and hoped therefore baby would succeed in drawing + her supper. As soon as the water was warm he mixed some with the milk, but + not so much this time, and put the mixture in the bottle. To his delight, + the baby sucked it up splendidly. The bottle, thought out between the + heavy linen and the hard street, was a success! Labour is not unfriendly + to thought, as the annals of weaving and shoe-making witness. + </p> + <p> + And now at last was Clare equipped for a great attempt: he was going to + wash the baby! He was glad that disrespectful Tommy was not in the house. + With a basin of warm water and his precious piece of soap he set about it, + and taking much pains washed his treasure perfectly clean. It was a state + of bliss in which, up to that moment, I presume, she had never been since + her birth. In the process he handled her, if not with all the skill of a + nurse, yet with the tenderness of a mother. His chief anxiety was not to + hurt, more than could not be helped, the poor little rat-eaten toes. He + felt he must wash them, but when in the process she whimpered, it went all + through the calves of his legs. When the happy but solicitous task was + over, during which the infant had shown the submission of great weakness, + he wrapped her in another blanket, and laid her down again. Soothed and + comfortable, as probably never soothed or comfortable before, she went to + sleep. + </p> + <p> + As soon as she was out of his arms, he took a piece of bread, and with + some of the hot water made a little sop for the dog, which the small hero, + whose four legs carried such a long barrel of starvation, ate with + undisguised pleasure and thankfulness. For his own supper Clare preferred + his bread dry, following it with a fine draught of water from the well. + </p> + <p> + Then, and not till then, returned the thought—what had Tommy done + with himself? Left to himself he was sure to go stealing! He might have + been taken in the act! Clare could hardly believe he had actually run away + from him. On the other hand, he had left the baby, and knew that if he + returned he would be put in the water-butt! He might have come to the + conclusion that he could do better without Clare, who would not let him + steal! It was clear he did not like taking his share in the work of the + family, and looking after the baby! Had he been anything of a true boy, + Clare would have taken his bread in his hand and gone to look for him; + being such as he was, he did not think it necessary. He felt bound to do + his best for him if he came back, but he did not feel bound to leave the + baby and roam the country to find a boy with whom baby's life would be in + constant danger. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0033" id="link2HCH0033"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXXIII. A bad penny. + </h2> + <p> + Before Clare had done his thinking, darkness had fallen, and, weary to the + very bones, he threw himself on the bed beside the baby. The dog jumped up + and laid himself at his feet, as if the place had been his from time + immemorial—as it had perhaps been, according to time in dog-land. + The many pleasures of that blessed day would have kept Clare awake had + they not brought with them so much weariness. He fell fast asleep. Tommy + had not had a happy day: he had been found out in evil-doing, had done + more evil, and had all the day been in dread of punishment. He did not + foresee how ill things would go for him—did not see that a rat had + taken his place beside the baby, and that he would not get back before + Clare; but the vision of the water-butt had often flashed upon his inner + eye, and it had not been the bliss of his solitude. He deserted his post + in the hope of finding something to eat, and had not had a mouthful of + anything but spongy turnip, and dried-up mangel-wurzel, or want-root. If + he had been minding his work, he would have had a piece of good bread—so + good that he would have wanted more of it, whereas, when he had eaten the + turnip and the beetroot, he had cause to wish he had not eaten so much! He + had been set upon by boys bigger than himself, and nearly as bad, who, not + being hungry, were in want of amusement, and had proceeded to get it out + of Tommy, just as Tommy would have got it out of the baby had he dared. + They bullied him in a way that would have been to his heart's content, had + he been the bully instead of the bullied. They made him actually wish he + had stayed with the baby—and therewith came the thought that it was + time to go home if he would get back before Clare. As to what had taken + place in the morning, he knew Clare's forgivingness, and despised him for + it. If he found the baby dead, or anything happened to her that he could + not cover with lying, it would be time to cut and run in earnest! So the + moment he could escape from his tormenters, off went Tommy for home. But + as he ran he remembered that there was but one way into the house, and + that was by the very lip of the water-butt. + </p> + <p> + Clare woke up suddenly—at a sound which all his life would wake him + from the deepest slumber: he thought he heard the whimpering of a child. + The baby was fast asleep. Instantly he thought of Tommy. He seemed to see + him shut out in the night, and knew at once how it was with him: he had + gone out without thinking how he was to get back, and dared not go near + the water-butt! He jumped out of bed, put on his shoes, and in a minute or + two was over the wall and walking along the lane outside of it, to find + the deserter. + </p> + <p> + The moon was not up, and the night was dark, yet he had not looked long + before he came upon him, as near the house as he could get, crouching + against the wall. + </p> + <p> + “Tommy!” said Clare softly. + </p> + <p> + Tommy did not reply. The fear of the water-butt was upon him—a fear + darker than the night, an evil worse than hunger or cold—and Clare + and the water-butt were one. + </p> + <p> + “You needn't think to hide, Tommy; I see you, you bad boy!” whispered + Clare. “After all I said, you ran away and left the baby to the rats! + They've been biting her horribly—one at least has. You can stay away + as long as you like now; I've got a better nurse. Good-night!” Tommy gave + a great howl. + </p> + <p> + “Hold your tongue, you rascal!” cried Clare, still in a whisper. “You'll + let the police know where we are!” + </p> + <p> + “Do let me in, Clare! I'm so 'ungry and so cold!” + </p> + <p> + “Then I shall have to put you in the water-butt! I said I would!” + </p> + <p> + “If you don't promise not to, I'll go straight to the police. They'll take + the brat from you, and put her in the workhouse!” + </p> + <p> + Clare thought for a moment whether it would not be right to kill such a + traitor. His mind was full of history-tales, and, like Dante, he put + treachery in its own place, namely the deepest hell. But with the thought + came the words he had said so many times without thinking what they meant—“Forgive + us our trespasses, as we forgive them that trespass against us,” and he + saw that he was expected to forgive Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “Tommy, I forgive you,” he said solemnly, “and will be friends with you + again; but I have said it, and I was right to say it, and into the + water-butt you must go! I can't trust your word now, and I think I shall + be able to trust it after that.” + </p> + <p> + Ere he had finished the words, Tommy lifted up his voice in a most + unearthly screech. + </p> + <p> + Instantly Clare had him by the throat, so that he could not utter a sound. + </p> + <p> + “Tommy,” he said, “I'm going to let you breathe again, but the moment you + make a noise, I'll choke you as I'm doing now.” + </p> + <p> + With that he relaxed his hold. But Tommy had paid no heed to what he said, + and began a second screech the moment he found passage for it. Immediately + he was choked, and after two or three attempts, finally desisted. + </p> + <p> + “I won't!” he said. + </p> + <p> + “You shall, Tommy. You're going head over in the butt. We're going to it + now!” + </p> + <p> + Tommy threw himself upon the ground and kicked, but dared not scream. It + was awful! He would drop right through into the great place where the moon + was! + </p> + <p> + Clare threw him over his shoulder, and found him not half the weight of + the parcel of linen. Tommy would have bitten like a weasel, but he feared + Clare's terrible hands. He was on the back of Giant Despair, in the form + of one of the best boys in the world. Clare took him round the wall, and + over the fence into the blacksmith's yard. The smithy was quite dark. + </p> + <p> + “Please, I didn't mean to do it!” sobbed Tommy from behind him, as Clare + bore him steadily up the yard. It was all he could do to say the words, + for the thought of what they were approaching sent a scream into his + throat every time he parted his lips to speak. + </p> + <p> + Clare stopped. + </p> + <p> + “What didn't you mean to do?” he asked. + </p> + <p> + “I didn't mean to leave the baby.” + </p> + <p> + “How did you do it then?” + </p> + <p> + “I mean I didn't mean to stay away so long. I didn't know how to get + back.” + </p> + <p> + “I told you not to leave her! And you could have got back perfectly, you + little coward!” + </p> + <p> + Tommy shuddered, and said no more. Though hanging over Clare's back he + knew presently, by his stopping, that they had come to the heap. There was + only that heap and the wall between him and the water-butt! Up and up he + felt himself slowly, shakingly carried, and was gathering his breath for a + final utterance of agony that should rouse the whole neighbourhood, when + Clare, having reached the top, seated himself upon the wall, and Tommy + restrained himself in the hope of what a parley might bring. But he sat + down only to wheel on the pivot of his spine, as he had seen them do on + the counter in the shop, and sit with his legs alongside of the + water-butt. Then he drew Tommy from his shoulder, in spite of his + clinging, and laid him across his knees; and Tommy, divining there were + words yet to be said, and hoping to get off with a beating, which he did + not mind, remained silent. + </p> + <p> + “Your hour is come, Tommy!” said Clare. “If you scream, I will drop you + in, and hold you only by one leg. If you don't scream, I will hold you by + both legs. If you scream when I take you out, in you go again! I do what I + say, Tommy!” + </p> + <p> + The wretched boy was nearly mad with terror. But now, much as he feared + the water, he feared yet more for the moment him in whom lay the power of + the water. Clare took him by the heels. + </p> + <p> + “I'm sorry there's no moon, as I promised you,” he said; “she won't come + up for my calling. I should have liked you to see where you were going. + But if you ain't an honest boy after this, you shall have another chance; + and next time we will wait for the moon!” + </p> + <p> + With that he lifted Tommy's legs, holding him by the ankles, and would + have shoved his body over the edge of the butt into the water. But Tommy + clung fast to his knees. + </p> + <p> + “Leave go, Tommy,” he said, “or I'll tumble you right in.” + </p> + <p> + Tommy yielded, his will overcome by a greater fear. Clare let him hang for + a moment over the black water, and slowly lowered him. Tommy clung to the + side of the butt. Clare let go one leg, and taking hold of his hands + pulled them away. Tommy's terror would have burst in a frenzied yell, but + the same instant he was down to the neck in the water, and lifted out + again. He spluttered and gurgled and tried to scream. + </p> + <p> + “Now, Tommy,” said Clare, “don't scream, or I'll put you in again.” + </p> + <p> + But Tommy never believed anything except upon compulsion. The moment he + could, that moment he screamed, and that moment he was in the water again. + The next time he was taken out, he did not scream. Clare laid him on the + wall, and he lay still, pretending to be drowned. Clare got up, set him on + his feet in front of him, and holding him by the collar, trotted him round + the top of the wall to the door, and dropped him into the garden. He was + quiet enough now—more than subdued—incapable even of + meditating revenge. But when they entered the nursery, the dog, taking + Tommy for a worse sort of rat, made a leap at him right off the bed, as if + he would swallow him alive, and the start and the terror of it brought him + quite to himself again. + </p> + <p> + “Quiet, Abdiel!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + The dog turned, jumped up on the bed, and lay down again close to the + baby. + </p> + <p> + Clare, who, I have said, was in old days a reader of <i>Paradise Lost</i>, + had already given him the name of <i>Abdiel</i>. + </p> + <p> + “Please, I couldn't help yelling!” said Tommy, very meekly. “I didn't know + you'd got <i>him</i>!” + </p> + <p> + “I know you couldn't help it!” answered Clare. “What have you had to eat + to-day?” + </p> + <p> + “Nothing but a beastly turnip and a wormy beet,” said Tommy. “I'm awful + hungry.” + </p> + <p> + “You'd have had something better if you'd stuck by the baby, and not left + her to the rats!” + </p> + <p> + “There ain't no rats,” growled Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “Will you believe your own eyes?” returned Clare, and showed him the skin + of the rat Abdiel had slain. “I've a great mind to make you eat it!” he + added, dangling it before him by the tail. + </p> + <p> + “Shouldn't mind,” said Tommy. “I've eaten a rat afore now, an' I'm that + hungry! Rats ain't bad to eat. I don't know about their skins!” + </p> + <p> + “Here's a piece of bread for you. But you sha'n't sleep with honest people + like baby and Abdiel. You shall lie on the hearth-rug. Here's a blanket + and a pillow for you!” + </p> + <p> + Clare covered him up warm, thatching all with a piece of loose carpet, and + he was asleep directly. + </p> + <p> + The next day all terror of the water-butt was gone from the little + vagabond's mind. He was now, however, thoroughly afraid of Clare, and his + conceit that, though Clare was the stronger, he was the cleverer, was put + in abeyance. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0034" id="link2HCH0034"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXXIV. How things went for a time. + </h2> + <p> + Clare's next day went much as the preceding, only that he was early at the + shop. When his dinner-hour came, he ran home, and was glad to find Tommy + and the dog mildly agreeable to each other. He had but time to give baby + some milk, and Tommy and Abdiel a bit of bread each. + </p> + <p> + His look when he returned, a look of which he was unaware, but which one + of the girls, who had a year ago been hungry for weeks together, could + read, made her ask him what he had had for dinner. He said he had had no + dinner. + </p> + <p> + “Why?” she asked. + </p> + <p> + “Because there wasn't any.” + </p> + <p> + “Didn't your mother keep some for you?” + </p> + <p> + “No; she couldn't.” + </p> + <p> + “Then what will you do?” + </p> + <p> + “Go without,” answered Clare with a smile. + </p> + <p> + “But you've got a mother?” said the girl, rendered doubtful by his smile. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, yes! I've got two mothers. But their arms ain't long enough,” replied + Clare. + </p> + <p> + The girl wondered: was he an idiot, or what they called a poet? Anyhow, + she had a bun in her pocket, which she had meant to eat at five o'clock, + and she offered him that. + </p> + <p> + “But what will you do yourself? Have you another?” asked Clare, unready to + take it. + </p> + <p> + “No,” she answered; “why shouldn't I go without as well as you?” + </p> + <p> + “Because it won't make things any better. There will be just as much + hunger. It's only shifting it from me to you. That will leave it all the + same!” + </p> + <p> + “No, not the same,” she returned. “I've had a good dinner—as much as + I could eat; and you've had none!” + </p> + <p> + Clare was persuaded, and ate the girl's bun with much satisfaction and + gratitude. + </p> + <p> + When he had his wages in the evening, he spent them as before—a + penny for the baby, and fivepence at Mr. Ball's for Tommy, Abdiel, and + himself. + </p> + <p> + Observing that he came daily, and spent all he earned, except one penny, + on bread; seeing also that the boy's cheeks, though plainly he was in good + health, were very thin, Mr. Ball wondered a little: a boy ought to look + better than that on five pennyworth of bread a day! + </p> + <p> + They were a curious family—Clare, and Tommy, and the baby, and + Abdiel. But the only thing sad about it was, that Clare, who was the head + and the heart of it, and provided for all, should be upheld by no human + sympathy, no human gratitude; that he should be so high above his + companions that, though he never thought he was lonely, he could not help + feeling lonely. Not once did he wish himself rid of any single member of + his adopted family. It was living on his very body; he was growing a + little thinner every day; if things had gone on so, he must before long + have fallen ill; but he never thought of himself at all, body or soul. + </p> + <p> + He had no human sympathy or gratitude, I say, but he had both sympathy and + gratitude from Abdiel. The dog never failed to understand what Clare + wished and expected him to understand. In Clare's absence he took on + himself the protection of the establishment, and was Tommy's superior. + </p> + <p> + Though Tommy was of no use to earn bread, Clare did not therefore allow + him to be idle. He insisted on his keeping the place clean and tidy, and + in this respect Tommy was not quite a failure. He even made him do some + washing, though not much could be accomplished in that way where there was + so little to wash. Now that Abdiel was nurse, Tommy had the run of the + garden, and often went beyond it for an hour or two without Clare's + knowledge, but always took good care to be back before his return. + </p> + <p> + A bale of goods happening to be unpacked in his presence one day, Clare + begged the head-shopman, who was also a partner, for a piece of what it + was wrapped in; and he, having noted how well he worked, and being quite + aware they could not get another such boy at such wages, gave him a large + piece of the soiled canvas. Now Mrs. Person had taught Clare to work,—as + I think all boys ought to be taught, so as not to be helpless without + mother or sister,—and with the help of a needle and some thread the + friendly girl gave him, he soon made of the packing-sheet a pair of + trousers for Tommy, of a primitive but not unserviceable cut, and a shirt + for himself, of fashion more primitive still. He managed it this way: he + cut a hole in the middle of a piece of the stuff, through which to put his + head, and another hole on each side of that, through which to put his + arms, and hemmed them all round. Then, having first hemmed the garment + also, he indued it, and let the voluminous mass arrange itself as it + might, under as much of his jacket and trousers as cohered. + </p> + <p> + My reader may well wonder how, in what was called a respectable shop, he + could be permitted to appear in such poverty; but Mr. Maidstone disliked + the boy so much that he meant to send him away the moment he found another + to do his work, and gave orders that he should never come up from the + basement except when wanted to carry a parcel. The fact was that his + still, solemn, pure face was a haunting rebuke to his master, although he + did not in the least recognize the nature, or this as the cause, of his + dislike. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0035" id="link2HCH0035"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXXV. Clare disregards the interests of his employers. + </h2> + <p> + Things went on for nearly a month, every one thriving but Clare. Yet was + Clare as peaceful as any, and much happier than Tommy, to whose + satisfaction adventure was needful. + </p> + <p> + One day, a lady, attracted by a muff in the shop-window labelled with a + very low price, entered, and requested to see it. + </p> + <p> + “We can offer you a choice from several of the sort, madam,” said the + shopman. “It is one of a lot we bought cheap, but quite uninjured, after a + fire.” + </p> + <p> + “I want to see the one in the window,” the lady answered. + </p> + <p> + “I hope you will excuse me, madam,” returned the shopman. “The muff is in + a position hard to reach. Besides, we must ask leave to take anything down + after the window is dressed for the day, and the master is out. But I will + bring you the same fur precisely.” + </p> + <p> + So saying, he went, and returned presently with a load of muffs and other + furs, which he threw on the counter. But the lady had heard that “there's + tricks i' the world,” and persisted in demanding a sight of the muff in + the window. Being a “tall personage” and cool, she carried her point. The + muff was hooked down and brought her—not graciously. She glanced at + it, turned it over, looked inside, and said, + </p> + <p> + “I will take it. Please bring a bandbox for it.” + </p> + <p> + “I will, madam,” said the man, and would have taken the muff. But she held + it fast, sought her purse, and laid the price on the counter. The shopman + saw that she knew what both of them were about, took up the money, went + and fetched a bandbox, put the muff in it before her eyes, and tied it up. + The lady held out her hand for it. + </p> + <p> + “Shall I not send it for you, madam?” he said. + </p> + <p> + “I do not live here,” she answered. “I am on my way to the station.” + </p> + <p> + “Here, Jack,” cried the shopman to Clare, whom he caught sight of that + moment going down to the basement, “take this bandbox, and go with the + lady to the station.” + </p> + <p> + If his transaction with the lady had pleased the man, he would not have + sent such a scarecrow to attend her, although she did not belong to the + town, and they might never see her again! The lady, on her part, was about + to insist on carrying the bandbox herself; but when Clare came forward, + and looked up smiling in her face, she was at once aware that she might + trust him. The man stood watching for the moment when she should turn her + back, that he might substitute another bandbox for the one Clare carried; + but Clare never looked at him, and when the lady walked out of the shop, + walked straight out after her. Along the street he followed her steadily, + she looking round occasionally to see that he was behind her. + </p> + <p> + They had gone about half-way to the station, when from a side street came + a lad whom Clare knew as one employed in the packing-room. He carried a + box exactly like that Clare had in his hand, and came softly up behind + him. Clare did not turn his head, for he did not want to talk to him while + he was attending on the lady. + </p> + <p> + “Look spry!” he said in a whisper. “She don't twig! It's all right! + Maidstone sent me.” + </p> + <p> + Clare looked round. The lad held out his bandbox for him to take, and his + empty hand to take Clare's instead. But Clare had by this time begun to + learn a little caution. Besides, the lady's interests were in his care, + and he could be party to nothing done behind her back! He had not time to + think, but knew it his duty to stick by the bandbox. If we have come up + through the animals to be what we are, Clare must have been a dog of a + good, faithful breed, for he did right now as by some ancient instinct. He + held fast to the box, neither slackening his pace nor uttering a word. The + lad gave him a great punch. Clare clung the harder to the box. The lady + heard something, and turned her head. The boy already had his back to her, + and was walking away, but she saw that Clare's face was flushed. + </p> + <p> + “What is the matter?” she asked. + </p> + <p> + “I don't rightly know, ma'am. He wanted me to give him my bandbox for his, + and said Mr. Maidstone had sent him. But I couldn't, you know!—except + he asked you first. You did pay for it—didn't you, ma'am?” + </p> + <p> + “Of course I did, or he wouldn't have let me take it away! But if you + don't know what it means, I do.—You haven't been in that shop long, + have you?” + </p> + <p> + “Not quite a month, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + “I thought so!” + </p> + <p> + She said no more, and Clare followed in silence, wondering not a little. + When they reached the station, she took the bandbox, and looked at the + boy. He returned her gaze, his gray eyes wondering. She searched her purse + for a shilling, but, unable to find one, was not sorry to give him a + half-crown instead. + </p> + <p> + “You had better not mention that I gave you anything?” she said. + </p> + <p> + “I will not, ma'am, except they ask me,” he answered. + </p> + <p> + “But,” he added, his face in a glow of delight, “is all this for me?” + </p> + <p> + “To be sure,” she answered. “I am much obliged to you for—carrying + my parcel. Be a honest boy whatever comes, and you will not repent it.” + </p> + <p> + “I will try, ma'am,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + But, to speak accurately, he did not know what it was to <i>try</i> to be + honest: he had never been tempted to be anything else, and had scarcely + had the idea of dishonesty in his mind except in relation to Tommy. Do you + say, “Then it was no merit to him”? Certainly it was none. Who was + thinking of merit? Not Clare. He is a sneak who thinks of merit. He is a + cad who can't do a gentlemanly action without thinking himself a fine + fellow! It might be a merit in many a man to act as Clare did, but in + Clare it was pure rightness—or, if you like the word better, + righteousness. + </p> + <p> + Clare as little thought what awaited him. Had there been any truth, any + appreciation of honesty in his vulgar heart, Mr. Maidstone could not have + done as now he did. When his messenger came back with the tale of how he + had been foiled, he said nothing, but his lips grew white. He closed them + fast, and went and stood near the door. When Clare, unsuspecting as + innocent, opened it, he was met by a blow that dazed him, and a fierce + kick that sent him on his back to the curbstone. Almost insensible, but + with the impression that something was interfering between him and his + work, he returned to the door. As he laid his hand on it, it opened a + little, and his master's face, with a hateful sneer upon it, shot into the + crack, and spit in his. Then the door shut so sharply that his fingers + caught an agonizing pinch. At last he understood: he was turned off, and + his day's wages were lost! + </p> + <p> + What would have become of him now but for the half-crown the lady had + given him! She was not <i>quite</i> a lady, or she would have walked out + of the shop, and declined to gain by frustrating a swindle; but she was a + good-hearted woman, and God's messenger to Clare. He bought a bigger loaf + than usual, at which, and the time of the day when he bought it, and the + half-crown presented in payment, Mr. Ball wondered; but neither said + anything—Mr. Ball from indecision, Clare from eagerness to get home + to his family. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0036" id="link2HCH0036"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXXVI. The policeman. + </h2> + <p> + But, alas! Clare had made another enemy—the lad whose attempt to + change the bandboxes he had foiled. The fellow followed him, lurkingly, + all the way home—on the watch for fit place to pounce upon him, and + punish him for doing right when he wanted him to do wrong. He saw him turn + into the opening that led to the well, and thought now he had him. But + when he followed him in, he was not to be seen! He did not care to cross + the well, not knowing what might meet him on the other side; but here was + news to carry back! He did so; and his master saw in them the opportunity + of indulging his dislike and revenge, and a means of invalidating whatever + Clare might reveal to his discredit! + </p> + <p> + Clare and the baby and Tommy and Abdiel had taken their supper with + satisfaction, and were all asleep. It was to them as the middle of the + night, though it was but past ten o'clock, when Abdiel all at once jumped + right up on his four legs, cocked his ears, listened, leaped off the bed, + ran to the door, and began to bark furiously. He was suddenly blinded by + the glare of a bull's-eye-lantern, and received a kick that knocked all + the bark out of him, and threw him to the other side of the room. A huge + policeman strode quietly in, sending the glare of his bull's-eye all about + the room like a vital, inquiring glance. It discovered, one after the + other, every member of the family. So tired was Clare, however, that he + did not wake until seized by a rough hand, and at one pull dragged + standing on the floor. + </p> + <p> + “Take care of the baby!” he cried, while yet not half awake. + </p> + <p> + “<i>I'll</i> take care o' the baby, never fear!—an' o' you too, you + young rascal!” returned the policeman. + </p> + <p> + He roused Tommy, who was wide awake, but pretending to be asleep, with a + gentle kick. + </p> + <p> + “Up ye get!” he said; and Tommy got up, rubbing his ferret eyes. + </p> + <p> + “Come along!” said the policeman. + </p> + <p> + “Where to?” asked Clare. + </p> + <p> + “You'll see when you get there.” + </p> + <p> + “But I can't leave baby!” + </p> + <p> + “Baby must come along too,” answered the policeman, more gently, for he + had children of his own. + </p> + <p> + “But she has no clothes to go in!” objected Clare. + </p> + <p> + “She must go without, then.” + </p> + <p> + “But she'll take cold!” + </p> + <p> + “She don't run naked in the house, do she?” + </p> + <p> + “No; she can't run yet. I keep her in a blanket. But the blanket ain't + mine; I can't take it with me.” + </p> + <p> + “You're mighty scrup'lous!” returned the policeman. “You don't mind takin' + a 'ole 'ouse an' garding, but you wouldn' think o' takin' a blanket!—Oh, + no! Honest boy <i>you</i> are!” + </p> + <p> + He turned sharp round, and caught Tommy taking a vigorous sight at him. + Tommy, courageous as a lion behind anybody's back, dropped on the rug + sitting. + </p> + <p> + “We've done the house no harm,” said Clare, “and I will <i>not</i> take + the blanket. It would be stealing!” + </p> + <p> + “Then I will take it, and be accountable for it,” rejoined the man. “I + hope that will satisfy you!” + </p> + <p> + “Certainly,” answered Clare. “You are a policeman, and that makes it all + right.” + </p> + <p> + “Rouse up then, and come along. I want to get home.” + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir, wouldn't it do in the morning?” pleaded Clare. “I've no work + now, and could easily go then. That way we should all have a sleep.” + </p> + <p> + “My eye ain't green enough,” replied the policeman. “Look sharp!” + </p> + <p> + Clare said no more, but went to the baby. With sinking but courageous + heart, he wrapped her closer in her blanket, and took her in his arms. He + could not help her crying, but she did not scream. Indeed she never really + screamed; she was not strong enough to scream. + </p> + <p> + “Get along,” said the policeman. + </p> + <p> + Clare led the way with his bundle, sorely incommoded by the size and + weight of the wrapping blanket, the corners of which, one after the other, + would keep working from his hold, and dropping and trailing on the ground. + Behind him came Tommy, a scarecrow monkey, with mischievous face, and + greedy beads for eyes—type not unknown to the policeman, who brought + up the rear, big enough to have all their sizes cut out of him, and yet + pass for a man. Down the stair they went, and out at the front door, which + Clare for the first time saw open, and so by the iron gate into the + street. + </p> + <p> + “Which way, please?” asked Clare, turning half round with the question. + </p> + <p> + “To the right, straight ahead. The likes o' you, young un, might know the + way to the lock-up without astin'!” + </p> + <p> + Clare made no answer, but walked obedient. It was a sad procession—comical + indeed, but too sad when realized to continue ludicrous. The thin, + long-bodied, big-headed, long-haired, long-tailed, short-legged animal + that followed last, seemed to close it with a never-ending end. + </p> + <p> + There was no moon; nothing but the gas-lamps lighted Clare's <i>Via + dolorosa</i>. He hugged the baby and kept on, laying his cheek to hers to + comfort her, and receiving the comfort he did not seek. + </p> + <p> + They came at last to the <i>lock-up</i>, a new building in the rear of the + town-house. There this tangle of humanity, torn from its rock and afloat + on the social sea, drifted trailing into a bare brilliant room, and at its + head, cast down but not destroyed, went heavy-laden Clare, with so much in + him, but only his misery patent to eyes too much used to misery to reap + sorrow from the sight. + </p> + <p> + The head policeman—they called him the inspector—received the + charge, that of house-breaking, and entered it. Then they were taken away + to the lock-up—all but the faithful Abdiel, who, following, received + another of the kicks which that day rained on every member of that epitome + of the human family except the baby, who, small enough for a mother to + drown, was too small for a policeman to kick. The door was shut upon them, + and they had to rest in that grave till the resurrection of the morning + should bring them before the magistrate. + </p> + <p> + Their quarters were worse than chilly—to all but the baby in her + blanket manifoldly wrapped about her, and in Clare's arms. Tommy would + gladly have shared that blanket, more gladly yet would have taken it all + for himself and left the baby to perish; but he had to lie on the broad + wooden bench and make the best of it, which he did by snoring all the + night. It passed drearily for Clare, who kept wide awake. He was not + anxious about the morrow; he had nothing to be ashamed of, therefore + nothing to fear; but he had baby to protect and cherish, and he dared not + go to sleep. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0037" id="link2HCH0037"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXXVII. The magistrate. + </h2> + <p> + The dawn came at last, and soon after the dawn footsteps, but they + approached only to recede. When the door at length opened, it was but to + let a pair of eyes glance round on them, and close again. The hours seemed + to be always beginning, and never going on. But at the long last came the + big policeman. To Clare's loving eyes, how friendly he looked! + </p> + <p> + “Come, kids!” he said, and took them through a long passage to a room in + the town-hall, where sat a formal-looking old gentleman behind a table. + </p> + <p> + “Good morning, sir!” said Clare, to the astonishment of the magistrate, + who set his politeness down as impudence. + </p> + <p> + Nor was the mistake to be wondered at; for the baby in Clare's arms hid, + with the mountain-like folds of its blanket, the greater part of his face, + and the old gentleman's eyes fell first on Tommy; and if ever <i>scamp</i> + was written clear on a countenance, it was written clear on Tommy's. + </p> + <p> + “Hold your impudent tongue!” said a policeman, and gave Clare a cuff on + the head. + </p> + <p> + “Hold, John,” interposed the magistrate; “it is my part to punish, not + yours.” + </p> + <p> + “Thank you, sir,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “I will thank <i>you</i>, sir,” returned the magistrate, “not to speak + till I put to you the questions I am about to put to you.—What is + the charge against the prisoners?” + </p> + <p> + “Housebreaking, sir,” answered the big man. + </p> + <p> + “What! Housebreaking! Boys with a baby! House-breakers don't generally go + about with babies in their arms! Explain the thing.” + </p> + <p> + The policeman said he had received information that unlawful possession + had been taken of a building commonly known as The Haunted House, which + had been in Chancery for no one could tell how many years. He had gone to + see, and had found the accused in possession of the best bedroom—fast + asleep, surrounded by indications that they had made themselves at home + there for some time. He had brought them along. + </p> + <p> + The magistrate turned his eyes on Clare. + </p> + <p> + “You hear what the policeman says?” he said. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, sir,” answered Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Well?” + </p> + <p> + “Sir?” + </p> + <p> + “What have you to say to it?” + </p> + <p> + “Nothing, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “Then you allow it is true?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “What right had you to be there?” + </p> + <p> + “None, sir. But we had nowhere else to go, and nobody seemed to want the + place. We didn't hurt anything. We swept away a multitude of dead moths, + and killed a lot of live ones, and destroyed a whole granary of grubs; and + the dog killed a great rat.” + </p> + <p> + “What is your name?” + </p> + <p> + “Clare—Porson,” answered Clare, with a little intervening + hesitation. + </p> + <p> + “You are not quite sure?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes; that is my name; but I have another older one that I don't know.” + </p> + <p> + “A bad answer! The name you go by is not your own! Hum! Is that boy your + brother?” + </p> + <p> + “No, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “Your cousin?” + </p> + <p> + “No, sir; he's not any relation of mine. He's a tramp.” + </p> + <p> + “And what are you?” + </p> + <p> + “Something like one now, sir, but I wasn't always.” + </p> + <p> + “What were you?” + </p> + <p> + “Not much, sir. I didn't <i>do</i> anything till just lately.” + </p> + <p> + He could not bear at the moment to talk of his be-loved dead. He felt as + if the old gentleman would be rude to them. + </p> + <p> + “Is the infant there your sister?” + </p> + <p> + “She's my sister the big way: God made her. She's not my sister any other + way.” + </p> + <p> + “How does she come to be with you then?” + </p> + <p> + “I took her out of the water-butt. Some one threw her in, and I heard the + splash, and went and got her out.” + </p> + <p> + “Why did you not take her to the police?” + </p> + <p> + “I never thought of that. It was all I could do to keep her alive. I + couldn't have done it if we hadn't got into the house.” + </p> + <p> + “How long ago is that?” + </p> + <p> + “Nearly a month, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “And you've kept her there ever since?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, sir—as well as I could. I had only sixpence a day.” + </p> + <p> + “And what's that boy's name?” + </p> + <p> + “Tommy, sir.—I don't know any other.” + </p> + <p> + “Nice respectable company you keep for one who has evidently been well + brought up!” + </p> + <p> + “Baby's quite respectable, sir!” + </p> + <p> + “Hum!” + </p> + <p> + “And for Tommy, if I didn't keep him, he would steal. I'm teaching him not + to steal.” + </p> + <p> + “What woman have you got with you?” + </p> + <p> + “Baby's the only woman we've got, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “But who attends to her?” + </p> + <p> + “I do, sir. She only wants washing and rolling round in the blanket; she's + got no clothes to speak of. When I'm away, Tommy and Abdiel take care of + her.” + </p> + <p> + “Abdiel! Who on earth is that? Where is he?” said the magistrate, looking + round for some fourth member of the incomprehensible family. + </p> + <p> + “He's not on earth, sir; he's in heaven—the good angel, you know, + sir, that left Satan and came back again to God.” + </p> + <p> + “You must take him to the county-asylum, James!” said the magistrate, + turning to the tall policeman. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, he's all right, sir!” said James. + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir,” interrupted Clare eagerly, “I didn't mean the dog was in + heaven yet. I meant the angel I named him after!” + </p> + <p> + “They <i>had</i> a little dog with them, sir!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes—Abdiel. He wanted to be a prisoner too, but they wouldn't let + him in. He's a good dog—better than Tommy.” + </p> + <p> + “So! like all the rest of you, you can keep a dog!” + </p> + <p> + “He followed me home because he hadn't anybody to love,” said Clare. “He + don't have much to eat, but he's content. He would eat three times as much + if I could give it him; but he never complains.” + </p> + <p> + “Have you work of any sort?” + </p> + <p> + “I had till yesterday, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “Where?” + </p> + <p> + “At Mr. Maidstone's shop.” + </p> + <p> + “What wages had you?” + </p> + <p> + “Sixpence a day.” + </p> + <p> + “And you lived, all three of you, on that?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes; all four of us, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “What do you do at the shop?” + </p> + <p> + “Please your worship,” interposed policeman James, “he was sent about his + business yesterday.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” rejoined Clare, who did not understand the phrase, “I was sent with + a lady to carry her bandbox to the station.” + </p> + <p> + “And when you came back, you was turned away, wasn't you?” said James. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “What had you done?” asked the magistrate. + </p> + <p> + “I don't quite know, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “A likely story!” + </p> + <p> + Clare made no reply. + </p> + <p> + “Answer me directly.” + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir, you told me not to speak unless you asked me a question.” + </p> + <p> + “I said, 'A likely story!' which meant, 'Do you expect me to believe + that?'” + </p> + <p> + “Of course I do, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “Why?” + </p> + <p> + “Because it is true.” + </p> + <p> + “How am I to believe that?” + </p> + <p> + “I don't know, sir. I only know I've got to speak the truth. It's the + person who hears it that's got to believe it, ain't it, sir?” + </p> + <p> + “You've got to prove it.” + </p> + <p> + “I don't think so, sir; I never was told so; I was only told I must speak + the truth; I never was told I must prove what I said.—I've been + several times disbelieved, I know.” + </p> + <p> + “I should think so indeed!” + </p> + <p> + “It was by people who did not know me.” + </p> + <p> + “Never by people who did know you?” + </p> + <p> + “I think not, sir. I never was by the people at home.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah! you could not read what they were thinking!” + </p> + <p> + “Were you not believed when you were at home, sir?” + </p> + <p> + The magistrate's doubt of Clare had its source in the fact that, although + now he was more careful to speak the truth than are most people, it was + not his habit when a boy, and he had suffered severely in consequence. He + was annoyed, therefore, at his question, set him down as a hypocritical, + boastful prig, and was seized with a strong desire to shame him. + </p> + <p> + “I remand the prisoner for more evidence. Take the children to the + workhouse,” he said. + </p> + <p> + Tommy gave a sudden full-sized howl. He had heard no good of the + workhouse. + </p> + <p> + “The baby is mine!” pleaded Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Are you the father of it?” said the big policeman. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I think so: I saved her life.—She would have been drowned if I + hadn't looked for her when I heard the splash!” reasoned Clare, his face + drawn with grief and the struggle to keep from crying. + </p> + <p> + “She's not yours,” said the magistrate. “She belongs to the parish. Take + her away, James.” + </p> + <p> + The big policeman came up to take her. Clare would have held her tight, + but was afraid of hurting her. He did draw back from the outstretched + hands, however, while he put a question or two. + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir, will the parish be good to her?” he asked. + </p> + <p> + “Much better than you.” + </p> + <p> + “Will it let me go and see her?” he asked again, with an outbreaking sob. + </p> + <p> + “You can't go anywhere till you're out of this,” answered the big + policeman, and, not ungently, took the baby from him. + </p> + <p> + “And when will that be, please?” asked Clare, with his empty arms still + held out. + </p> + <p> + “That depends on his worship there.” + </p> + <p> + “Hold your tongue, James,” said the magistrate. “Take the boy away, John.” + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir, where am I going to?” asked Clare. + </p> + <p> + “To prison, till we find out about you.” + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir, I didn't mean to steal her. I didn't know the parish wanted + her!” + </p> + <p> + “Take the boy away, I tell you!” cried the magistrate angrily. “His tongue + goes like the hopper of a mill!” + </p> + <p> + James, carrying the baby on one arm, was already pushing Tommy before him + by the neck. Tommy howled, and rubbed his red eyes with what was left him + of cuffs, but did not attempt resistance. + </p> + <p> + “Please, don't let anybody hold her upside down, policeman!” cried Clare. + “She doesn't like it!—Oh, baby! baby!” + </p> + <p> + John tightened his grasp on his arm, and hurried him away in another + direction. + </p> + <p> + Where the big policeman issued with his charge, there was Abdiel hovering + about as if his spring were wound up so tight that it wouldn't go off. How + he came to be at that door, I cannot imagine. + </p> + <p> + When he spied Tommy, he rushed at him. Tommy gave him a kick that rolled + him over. + </p> + <p> + “Don't want <i>you</i>, you mangy beast!” he said, and tried to kick him + again. + </p> + <p> + Abdiel kept away from him after that, but followed the party to the + workhouse, where also, to his disgust, plainly expressed, he was refused + admittance. He returned to the entrance by which Clare had vanished from + his eyes the night before, and lay down there. I suspect he had an + approximate canine theory of the whole matter. He knew at least that Clare + had gone in with the others at that door; that he had not come out with + them at the other door; that, therefore, in all probability, he was within + that door still. + </p> + <p> + The police made inquiry at Mr. Maidstone's shop. Reasons for his dismissal + were there given involving no accusation: there was little desire in that + quarter to have the matter searched into. There was therefore nothing to + the discredit of the boy, beyond his running to earth in the neglected + house like a wild animal. After three days he was set at liberty. + </p> + <p> + As the big policeman led the way to the door to send him out, Clare + addressed him thus: + </p> + <p> + “Please, Mr. James, may I go back to the house for a little while?” + </p> + <p> + “Well, you <i>are</i> an innocent!” said James; “—or,” he added, + “the biggest little humbug ever I see!—No, it's not likely!” + </p> + <p> + “I only wanted,” explained Clare, “to set things straight a bit. The house + is cleaner than it was, <i>I</i> know, but it is not in such good order as + when we went into it. I don't like to leave it worse than we found it.” + </p> + <p> + “Never you heed,” said James, believing him perfectly before he knew what + he was about. “The house don't belong to nobody, so far as ever I heerd, + an' the things'll rot all the same wherever they stand.” + </p> + <p> + “But I should like,” persisted Clare. + </p> + <p> + “I couldn't do it off my own hook, an' his worship would think you only + wanted to steal something. The best thing you can do is to leave the place + at once, an' go where nobody knows nothing agin you.” + </p> + <p> + Thought Clare with himself, “If the house doesn't belong to anybody, why + wouldn't they let me stay in it?” + </p> + <p> + But the policeman opened the door, and as he was turning to say good-bye + to him, gave him a little shove, and closed it behind him. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0038" id="link2HCH0038"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXXVIII. The workhouse. + </h2> + <p> + He went into the street with a white face and a dazed look—not from + any hardship he had experienced during his confinement, for he had been in + what to him was clover, but because he had lost the baby and Abdiel, and + because his mind had been all the time in perplexity with regard to the + proceedings of justice: he did not and could not see that he had done + anything wrong. Throughout his life it never mattered much to Clare to be + accused of anything wrong, but it did trouble him, this time at least, to + be punished for doing what was right. He took it very quietly, however. + </p> + <p> + Indignation may be a sign of innocence, but it is no necessary consequence + of innocence any more than it is a proof of righteousness. A man will be + fiercely indignant at an accusation that happens to be false, who did the + very thing last week, and is ready to do it again. Indignation against + wrong to another even, is no proof of a genuine love of fair play. Clare + hardly resented anything done to himself. His inward unconscious purity + held him up, and made him look events in the face with an eye that was + single and therefore at once forgiving and fearless. The man who has no + mote in his own eye cannot be knocked down by the beam in his neighbour's; + while he who is busy with the mote in his neighbour's may stumble to + destruction over the beam in his own. + </p> + <p> + White and dazed as he came out, the moment he stepped across the + threshold, Clare met the comfort of God waiting for him. His eyes blinded + with the great light, for it was a glorious morning in the beginning of + June, he found himself assailed in unknightly fashion below the knee: + there, to his unspeakable delight, was Abdiel, clinging to him with his + fore-legs, and wagging his tail as if, like the lizards for terror, he + would shake it off for gladness! What a blessed little pendulum was + Abdiel's tail! It went by that weight of the clock of the universe called + devotion. It was the escapement of that delight which is of the essence of + existence, and which, when God has set right “our disordered clocks,” will + be its very consciousness. + </p> + <p> + Clare stood for a moment and looked about him. The needle of his compass + went round and round. It had no north. He could not go back to the shop; + he could not go back to the house; baby was in the workhouse, but he could + not stay there even if they would let him! Neither could he stop in the + town; the policeman said he must go away! Where was he to go? There was + not in the world one place for him better than another! But they would let + him see baby before he went!—and off he set to find the workhouse. + </p> + <p> + Abdiel followed quietly at his heel, for his master walked lost in + thought, and Abdiel was too hungry to make merry without his notice. + Clare, fresh to the world, had been a great reader for one so young, and + could encounter new experience with old knowledge. In his mind stood a + pile of fir-cones, and dried sticks, and old olive wood, which the merest + touch of experience would set in a blaze of practical conclusion. But the + workhouse was so near that his reflections before he reached it amounted + only to this—that there are worse places than a prison when you have + done nothing to deserve being put in it. A palace may be one of them. You + get enough to eat in a prison; in a palace you do not; you get too much! + </p> + <p> + The porter at the workhouse informed him it was not the day for seeing the + inmates; but the tall policeman had given Clare a hint, and he requested + to see the matron. After much demur and much entreaty, the man went and + told the matron. She, knowing the story of the baby, wanted to see Clare, + and was so much pleased with his manners and looks, that his sad clothes + pleaded for and not against him. She took him at once to the room where + the baby was with many more, telling him he must prove she was his by + picking her out. It was not wonderful that Clare, who knew the faces of + animals so well, should know his own baby the moment he saw her, + notwithstanding that she was decently clothed, and had already improved in + appearance. But the nurses declared they had never before seen a man, not + to say a boy, who could tell one baby from another. + </p> + <p> + “Why,” rejoined Clare, “my dog Abdiel could pick out the baby he was nurse + to!” + </p> + <p> + “Ah, but he's a dog!” + </p> + <p> + “And I'm a boy!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + He descried her on the lap of an old woman, seeming to him very old, who + was at the head of the nursery-department. Old as she was, however, she + had a keen eye, and a handsome countenance, with a quantity of white hair. + Unlike the rest of the women, though not far removed from them socially, + she knew several languages, so far as to read and enjoy books in them. Now + and then a great woman may be found in a workhouse, like a first folio of + Shakspere on a bookstall, among—oh, such companions! + </p> + <p> + “Let me take her,” said Clare modestly, holding out his hands for the + baby. + </p> + <p> + “Are you sure you will not let her drop?” + </p> + <p> + “Why, ma'am,” answered Clare, “she's my own baby! It was I took her out of + the water-butt! I washed and fed her every day!—not that I could do + it so well as you, ma'am!” + </p> + <p> + She gave him the baby, and watched him with the eye of a seeress, for she + had a wonderful insight into character, and that is one of the roots of + prophecy. + </p> + <p> + “You are a good and true lad,” she said at length, “and a hard success + lies before you. I don't know what you will come to, but, with those eyes, + and that forehead, and those hands, if you come to anything but good, you + will be terribly to blame.” + </p> + <p> + “I will try to be good, ma'am,” said Clare simply. “But I wish I knew what + they put me in prison for!” + </p> + <p> + “What, indeed, my lamb!” she returned; and her eyes flashed with + indignation under the cornice of her white hair. “They'll be put in prison + one day themselves that did it!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, I don't mind!” said Clare. “I don't want them to be punished. You see + I'm only waiting!” + </p> + <p> + “What are you waiting for, sonny?” asked the old woman. + </p> + <p> + “I don't exactly know—though I know better than what I was put in + prison for. Nobody ever told me anything, but I'm always waiting for + something.” + </p> + <p> + “The something will come, child. You will have what you want! Only go on + as you're doing, and you'll be a great man one day.” + </p> + <p> + “I don't want to be a great man,” answered Clare; “I'm only waiting till + what is coming does come.” + </p> + <p> + The woman cast down her eyes, and seemed lost in thought. Clare dandled + the baby gently in his arms, and talked loving nonsense to her. + </p> + <p> + “Well,” said the old woman, raising at length her eyes, with a look of + reverence in them, to Clare's, “I can't help you, and you want no help of + mine. I've got no money, but—” + </p> + <p> + “I've got plenty of money, ma'am,” interrupted Clare. “I've got a whole + shilling in my pocket!” + </p> + <p> + “Bless the holy innocent!” murmured the woman. “—Well, I can only + promise you this—that as long as I live, the baby sha'n't forget + you; and I ain't so old as I look.” + </p> + <p> + Here the matron came up, and said he had better be going now; but if he + came back any day after a month, he should see the baby again. + </p> + <p> + “Thank you, ma'am,” replied Clare. “Keep her a good baby, please. I will + come for her one day.” + </p> + <p> + “Please God I live to see that day!” said the old woman. “I think I + shall.” + </p> + <p> + She did live to see it, though I cannot tell that part of the story now. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0039" id="link2HCH0039"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XXXIX. Away. + </h2> + <p> + So Clare went once more into the street, where Abdiel was again watching + for him, and stood on the pavement, not knowing which way to turn. The big + policeman had told him that no one there would give him work after what + had happened; and now, therefore, he was only waiting for a direction to + present itself. In a moment it occurred to him that, having come in at one + end of the town, he had better go out at the other. He followed the + suggestion, and Abdiel followed him—his head hanging and his tail + also, for the joy of recovering his master had used up all the remnant of + wag there was in his clock. He had no more frolic or scamper in him now + than when Clare first saw him. How the poor thing had subsisted during the + last few days, it were hard to tell. It was much that he had escaped death + from ill-usage. Meanest of wretches are the boys or men that turn like + grim death upon the helpless. Except they change their way, helplessness + will overtake them like a thief, and they will look for some one to + deliver them and find none. Traitors to those whom it is their duty to + protect, they will one day find themselves in yet more pitiful plight than + ever were they. But I fear they will not believe it before their fate has + them by the throat. + </p> + <p> + Clare saw that the dog was famished. He stopped at a butcher's and bought + him a scrap of meat for a penny. Then he had elevenpence with which to + begin the world afresh, and was not hungry. + </p> + <p> + Out on the highway they went, in a perfect English summer day, with all + the world before them. It was not an oyster for Clare to open with sword, + pen, or <i>sesame</i>; but he might find a place on the outside of it for + all that, and a way over it into a better—one that he <i>could</i> + open and get at the heart of. The sun shone as on the day of the + earthquake—deep in Clare's dimmest memorial cavern;—shone as + if he knew, come what might, that all was well; that if he shone his heart + out and went dark, nothing would go wrong; while, for the present, + everything depended on his shining his glorious best. + </p> + <p> + “Come along, Abdiel,” said Clare; “we're going to see what comes next. At + the worst, you know what hunger is, doggie, and that a good deal of it can + be borne pretty well—though I'm not fond of it any more than you, + doggie! We'll not beg till we're downright forced, and we won't steal. + When that's the next thing, we'll just sit down, wag our tails, and die.—There!” + </p> + <p> + He gave him the last piece of his meat, and they trudged on for some time + without speaking. + </p> + <p> + The sun was very hot, for it was past noon an hour or two, when they came + to a public-house, with a pump before it, and a trough. Clare grew very + thirsty when he saw the pump, and imagined the rush of a thick sparkling + curve from its spout. But its handle was locked with a chain, to keep men + and women from having water instead of beer. He went with longing to the + trough, but the water in it was so unclean that, thirsty as he was, he + could not look on it even as a last resource. He walked into the house. + </p> + <p> + “Please, ma'am,” he said to the woman at the bar, “would you allow me to + pump myself a little water to drink?” + </p> + <p> + “You think I've got nothing to do but serve tramps with water!” she + answered, throwing back her head till her nostrils were at right angles + with the horizon. + </p> + <p> + “I'm not a tramp, ma'am,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Show me your money, then, for a pot of beer, like other honest folk.” + </p> + <p> + “I'm afraid I told you wrong, ma'am,” returned Clare. “I'm afraid I <i>am</i> + a tramp after all; only <i>I</i>'m looking for work, and most tramps + ain't, I fancy.” + </p> + <p> + “They all <i>say</i> they are,” answered the woman. “That's your story, + and that's theirs!” + </p> + <p> + “I've got elevenpence, ma'am; and could, I dare say, buy a pot of beer, + though I don't know the price of one; but I don't see where I'm going to + get any more money, and what we have must serve Abdiel and me till we do.” + </p> + <p> + “What right have <i>you</i> to a dog, when you ain't fit to pay your penny + for a half-pint o' beer?” + </p> + <p> + “Don't be hard on the young 'un, mis'ess; he don't look a bad sort!” said + a man who stood by with a pewter pot in his hand. + </p> + <p> + Clare wondered why he had his cord-trousers pulled up a few inches and + tied under his knees with a string, which made little bags of them there. + He had to think for a mile after they left the public-house before he + discovered that it was to keep them from tightening on his knees when he + stooped, and so incommoding him at his work. + </p> + <p> + “Thank you, sir,” he said. “I'm not a bad sort. I didn't know it was any + harm to ask for water. It ain't begging, is it, sir?” + </p> + <p> + “Not as I knows on,” replied the man. “Here, take the lot!” + </p> + <p> + He offered Clare his nearly emptied pewter. + </p> + <p> + “No, thank you, sir,” answered Clara “I am thirsty—but not so + thirsty as to take your drink from you. I can get on to the next pump. + Perhaps that won't be chained up like a bull!” + </p> + <p> + “Here, mis'ess!” cried the man. “This is a mate as knows a neighbour when + he sees him. I'll stand him a half-pint. There's yer money!” + </p> + <p> + Without a word the woman flung the man's penny in the till, and drew Clare + a half-pint of porter. Clare took it eagerly, turned to the man, said, “I + thank you, sir, and wish your good health,” and drained the pewter mug. He + had never before tasted beer, or indeed any drink stronger than tea, and + he did not like it. But he thanked his benefactor again, and went back to + the trough. + </p> + <p> + “Dogs don't drink beer,” he said to himself. “They know better!” and + lifting Abdiel he held him over the trough. Abdiel was not so fastidious + as his master, and lapped eagerly. Then they pursued their uncertain way. + </p> + <p> + Ready to do anything, he thought the shabbiness of his clothes would be a + greater bar to indoor than to outdoor work, and applied therefore at every + farm they came to. But he did not look so able as he was, and boys were + not much wanted. He never pitied himself, and never entreated: to beg for + work was beggary, and to beggary he would not descend until driven by + approaching death. But now and then some tender-hearted woman, oftener one + of ripe years, struck with his look—its endurance, perhaps, or its + weariness mingled with hope—would perceive the necessity of the boy, + and offer him the food he did not ask—nor like him the less that, + never doubting what came to one was for both, he gave the first share of + it to Abdiel. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0040" id="link2HCH0040"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XL. Maly. + </h2> + <p> + Travelling on in vague hope, meeting with kindness enough to keep him + alive, but getting no employment, sleeping in what shelter he could find, + and never missing the shelter he could not find, for the weather was + exceptionally warm for the warm season, he came one day to a village where + the strangest and hardest experience he ever encountered awaited him. What + part of the country he was in, or what was the name of the village, he did + not know. He seldom asked a question, seldom uttered word beyond a polite + greeting, but kept trudging on and on, as if the goal of his expectation + were ever drawing nigher. He felt no curiosity as to the names of the + places he passed through. Why should the names of towns and villages + strung on a road to nowhere in particular, interest him? He did, however, + long afterward, come to know the name of this village, and its + topographical relations: the place itself was branded on his brain. + </p> + <p> + He entered it in the glow of a hot noon, and had walked nearly through it + without meeting any one, for it was the dinner-hour, and savoury odours + filled the air, when a little girl came from a neat house, and ran farther + down the street. He was very tired, very dusty, had eaten nothing that + day, had begun to despair of work, and was wishing himself clear of the + houses that he might throw himself down. But something in the look of the + child made him quicken his weary step as he followed her. He overtook her, + passed her, and saw her face. Heavens! it was Maly, grown wonderfully + bigger! He turned and caught her up in his arms. She gave a screech of + terror, and he set her down in keenest dismay. Finding that he was not + going to run away with her, she did not run farther from him than to safe + parleying distance. + </p> + <p> + “You bad boy!” she cried; “you're not to touch me! I will tell mamma!” + </p> + <p> + “Why, Maly! don't you know me?” + </p> + <p> + “No, I don't You are a dirty boy!” + </p> + <p> + “But, Maly!—” + </p> + <p> + “My name is not Maly; it's Mary; and I don't know you.” + </p> + <p> + “Have you forgotten Clare, Maly?—Clare that used to carry you about + all day long?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes; I have forgotten you. You're a dirty, ragged beggar-boy! You're a + bad boy! Boys with holes in their clothes are bad boys.—Nursie told + me so, and she knows everything! She told me herself she knew everything!” + </p> + <p> + She gave another though milder scream: involuntarily, Clare had taken a + step toward her, with his hand in his pocket, searching, as in the old + days when she cried, for something to give her. But, alas, his pockets + were now as empty as his stomach! there was <i>nothing</i> in them—not + even a crumb saved from a scanty meal! While he was yet searching, the + little child, his heart's love—if indeed it was she—stooped, + gathered a handful of dust, and threw it at him. The big boy burst into + tears. The child mocked him for a minute, and when Clare looked up again, + drying his eyes with a rag, she was gone. + </p> + <p> + He felt no resentment; love, old memories, his strange gentleness, and + pity for Maly and Maly's mother, saved him from it. The child was big and + plump and rosy, but oh, how fallen from his little Maly! And, her child + grown such, the mother was poor indeed, though up in the dome of the + angels! If she did not know the change in her, it was the worse, for she + could not help! Clare, like most of my readers, had not yet learned to + trust God for everything. But he was true to Maly. Miserable over her + backsliding, he said to himself that evil counsellors were more to blame + than she. + </p> + <p> + “Did she know me at all?” he pondered; “or has she forgot me altogether?” + </p> + <p> + He began to doubt whether the girl was really Maly, or one very like her. + About half an hour after, he met a poor woman with a bundle on her bowed + back, who gave him a piece of bread. When he had eaten that, he began to + doubt whether he had met any little girl. He remembered that he had often + come to himself, as he wandered along the road, to find he had been lost + in fancies of old scenes or imaginary new ones; waked up, he did not at + once realize himself a poor lad on the tramp for work he could not find: + his conceptions were for a time stronger than the things around him. He + was thereupon comforted with the hope that he had not in reality seen + Maly, but had imagined the whole affair. How was it possible, though, that + he should imagine such horrible things of his little sister? On the other + hand, was it not more possible for a fainting brain to imagine such a + misery, than for the live child to behave in such a fashion? Every day for + many days he tormented himself with like reasonings; but by degrees the + occurrence, whether fancy or fact, receded, and he grew more conscious of + tramping, tramping along. He grew also more hopeless of getting work, but + not more doubtful that everything was right. For he knew of nothing he had + done to bring these things upon him. + </p> + <p> + His quiet content never left him. At the worst pinch of hunger and cold, + he never fell into despair. I do not know what merit he had in this, for + he was constituted more hopeful and placid than I ever knew another. What + he had merit in was, that not for a hungry boy's most powerful temptation, + something to eat, would he even imagine himself doing what must not be + done. He would not lead himself into temptation. Thus he pleased the Power—let + me rather say, ten times more truly—the Father from whom he came. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0041" id="link2HCH0041"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XLI. The caravans. + </h2> + <p> + Within a fortnight or so after the police had dismissed him, blowing him + loose on the world like a dandelion-seed in the wind, Clare had an + adventure which not only gave him pleasure, but led to work and food and + interest in life. + </p> + <p> + Passing one day from a cross-country road into the highway, he came + straight on the flank of a travelling menagerie. It was one of some size, + and Clare saw at a glance that its horses were in fair condition. The + front part of the little procession had already gone by, and an elephant + was passing at the moment with a caravan—of feline creatures, as + Clare afterwards learned, behind him. He drew it with absolute ease, but + his head seemed to be dragged earthward by the weight of his trunk, as he + plodded wearily along. A world of delight woke in the heart of the boy. He + had read much about strange beasts, but had never seen one. His impulse + was to run straight to the elephant, and tell him he loved him. For he was + a live beast, and Clare loved every creature, common or strange, wild or + tame, ordinary or wonderful. But prudent thought followed, and he saw it + better to hover around, in the hope of a chance of being useful. Oh, the + treasures of wonder and knowledge on the other side of those thin walls of + wood, so slowly drawn along the dusty highway! If but for a moment he + might gaze on their living marvels! He had no money, but things came to + him without money—not so plentifully as he could sometimes wish—but + they came, and so might this! Employment among those animals would be well + worth the long hungry waiting! This might be the very work he had been + looking for without knowing it! It was for this, perhaps, he had been kept + so long waiting—till the caravans should come along the road, and he + be at the corner as they passed! He did not know how often a man may think + thus and see it come to nothing—because there is better yet behind, + for which more waiting is wanted. + </p> + <p> + At the end of the procession came a bear, shuffling along uncomfortably. + It went to Clare's heart to see how far from comfortable the poor beast + appeared. “What a life it would be,” he thought, “to have all the + creatures in all those caravans to make happy! That would be a life worth + living!” + </p> + <p> + It was a worthy ambition—infinitely higher than that of boys who + want to do something great, or clever, or strong. As to those who want to + be rich—for their ambition I have an utter contempt. How gladly + would I drive that meanness out of any boy's heart! To fall in with the + work of the glad creator, and help him in it—that is the only + ambition worth having. It may not look a grand thing to do it in a + caravan, but it takes the mind of Christ to do it anywhere. + </p> + <p> + Behind the bear, closing the procession, came a stoutish, + good-tempered-looking man, in a small spring-cart, drawn by a small pony: + he was the earthly owner of that caged life, with all its gathered + discomforts. Clare lifted his cap as he passed him—a politeness of + which the man took no notice, because the boy was ragged. The moment he + was past, Clare fell in behind as one of the procession. He was prudent + enough, however, not to go so near as to look intrusive. + </p> + <p> + When he had followed thus for a mile or two, he saw, by signs patent to + every wanderer, that they were coming near a town. Before reaching it, + however, they arrived at a spot where the hedges receded from the road, + leaving a little green sward on the sides of it, and there the long line + came to a halt. + </p> + <p> + The menagerie had, the day before, been exhibited at a fair, and was now + on its way to another, to be held the next day in the town they were + approaching: they had made the halt in order to prepare their entrance. To + let a part of their treasure be seen, was the best way to rouse desire + after what was yet hidden: they were going, therefore, to take out an + animal or two more to walk in parade. Clare sat down at a little distance, + and wondered what was coming next. + </p> + <p> + Experience of tramps had made the men suspicious, and it may be they + disliked having their proceedings watched by anybody; but, happily for + Clare, it was the master himself who came up to him, not without something + of menace in his bearing. The boy was never afraid, and hope started up + full grown as the man approached. He rose and took off his cap—a + very ready action with Clare, which sprung from pure politeness, and from + nothing either selfish or cringing. But the man put his own interpretation + on the civility. + </p> + <p> + “What are you hanging about here for?” he said rudely. + </p> + <p> + Now Clare had a perfect right to answer, had he so pleased, that he was on + the king's highway, where no one had a right to interfere with him. But he + had the habit—he could not help it; it was natural to him—of + thinking first of the other party's side of a question—a rare gift, + which served him better than he knew. For the other may be in the right, + and it is an ugly thing to interfere with any man's right; while a man's + own rights are never so much good to him as when he waives them. + </p> + <p> + “I beg your pardon, sir,” he said; “I did not understand you wished to be + alone. I never thought you would mind me. Will it be far enough if I go + just out of sight, for I am very tired? It is pleasant, besides, to know + there are friends near!” + </p> + <p> + The man recognized in Clare the modes and speech of a gentleman; and + having, in the course of his wandering life, seen and known a good many + strange things, he suspected under the rags a history. But he was not + interested enough to stop and inquire into it. + </p> + <p> + “Never mind,” he said, in altered tone; “I see you're after no mischief!” + and with that walked away, leaving Clare to do as he pleased. + </p> + <p> + A few minutes more went by. Clare sat hungry and sleepy on the grass by + the roadside. Before he knew, he was on his feet, startled by a terrible + noise. The lion had opened his great jaws, and his brown leathery sides, + working like a pair of bellows, had sent from his throat a huge blast, + half roar, half howl. When Clare came to himself he knew, though he had + never heard it before, that the fearful sound was the voice of the lion. + He did not know that all it meant was, that his majesty had thought of his + dinner. It was not indeed much more than an audible gape. He stood for a + moment, not at all terrified, but half expecting to see a huge yellow + animal burst out of one of the caravans—he could not guess which: + the roar was much too loud to indicate one rather than another. He sat + down again, but was not any longer inclined to sleep. For a time, however, + no second roar came from the ribs of the captive monarch. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0042" id="link2HCH0042"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XLII. Nimrod. + </h2> + <p> + That there had been a fair not far off will partly account for what + follows. As Clare sat resting, which was all he could do, with sleep fled + and food nowhere, a roar of a different kind invaded his ears. It came + along the road this time, not from the caravans. He looked, and spied what + would have brought the heart into the throat of many a grown man. Away on + the road, in the direction whence the menagerie had come, he saw a cloud + of dust and a confused struggle, presently resolved into two men, each at + the end of a rope, and an animal between them attached to the ropes by a + ring in his nose. It was a bull, in terrible excitement, bounding this way + and that, dragging and driving the men—doing his best in fact to + break away, now from the one of them, now from the other, and now from + both at once. It must have tortured him to pull those strong men by the + cartilage of his nose, but he was in too great a rage to feel it much. + Every other moment his hoofs would be higher than his head, and again + hoofs and head and horns would be scraping the ground in a fruitless rush + to send one of his tormentors into space beyond the ken of bulls. With + swift divergence, like a scenting hound, he twisted and shot his huge + body. The question between men and bull seemed one of endurance. + </p> + <p> + The pale-faced boy, though full of interest in the strife, yet having had + no food that day, was not in sufficient spirits to run and meet the animal + whirlwind, so as to watch closer its chances; but the struggle came at + length near enough for him to follow almost every detail of it: he could + see the bloody foam drip from the poor beast's nostrils. When about fifty + yards away, the bull, by a sudden twist, wrenched the rope from the hands + of one of the men. He fell on his back. The other dropped his rope and + fled. The bull came scouring down the highway. + </p> + <p> + A second roar, as of muffled thunder, issued from the leathery flanks of + the lion. The bull made a sudden stop, scoring up the ground with his + hoofs. It seemed as if in full career he started back. Then down went his + head, and like a black flash, its accompanying thunder a bellow of defiant + contempt and wrath, he charged one of the caravans. He had taken the + hungry lion's roar for a challenge to combat. It was nothing to the bull + that the voice was that of an unknown monster; he was ready for whatever + the monster might prove. + </p> + <p> + The men busy about the caravans and wagons, caught sight of him coming, + and in the first moment of terror at a beast to which they were not + accustomed, bolted for refuge behind or upon them: they would sooner have + encountered their tiger broke loose. The same moment, with astounding + shock, the head of the bull went crack against the near hind-wheel of the + caravan in whose shafts stood the elephant, patiently waiting orders. The + bull had not caught sight of the elephant, or he would doubtless have + “gone for” him, not the caravan. His ear, finer than Clare's, must have + distinguished whence the roar proceeded: in that caravan, sure enough, was + the lion, with the rest of the great cats. He answered the blow of the + bull's head with a roar thunderously different from his late sleepy + leonine sigh. It roused every creature in the menagerie. From the greatest + to the smallest each took up its cry. Out burst a tornado of terrific + sound, filling with horror the quiet noontide. The roaring and yelling of + lion, tiger, and leopard, the laughter of hyena, the howling of jackal, + and the snarling of bear, mingled in hideous dissonance with the cries of + monkeys and parrots; while certain strange gurgles made Clare's heart, + lover of animals though he was, quiver, and his blood creep. The same + instant, however, he woke to the sense that he might do something: he ran + to the caravans. + </p> + <p> + By this time the men, master and all, fully roused to the far worse that + might follow the attack of the bull, had caught up what weapons were at + hand, and rushed to repel the animal For more than one or two of them it + might have proved a fatal encounter, but that the enraged beast had + entangled his horns in the spokes and rim of the wheel. In terror of what + might be approaching him from behind, he was struggling wildly to + extricate them. Peril upon peril! What if in the contortions of his mighty + muscles he pulled off the wheel, and the carriage toppled over, every cage + in it so twisted and wrenched that the bearings of its iron bars gave way! + The results were too terrible to ponder! This way and that, and every way + at once, he was writhing and pushing and prising and dragging. The + elephant turned the shafts slowly round to see what was the matter behind. + If the bull and the elephant yoked to the caravan came to loggerheads, + ruin was inevitable. The master thought whether he had not better loose + the elephant while the bull was yet entangled by the horns. With one blow + of his trunk he would break the ruffian's back and end the affray! It were + good even, if one knew how, to loose the wicked-looking horns: the brute's + struggles to free them were more dangerous far than could be the horns + themselves! + </p> + <p> + While he hesitated, Clare came running up, with Abdiel at his heels ready + as any hornet to fly at bull or elephant, let his master only speak the + word. But the moment Clare saw how the bull's horns were mixed up with the + spokes and fellies of the wheel, a glad suspicion flashed across him: that + was old Nimrod's way! could it be Nimrod himself? If it were, the trouble + was as good as over! The suspicion became a certainty the instant it woke. + But never could Clare altogether forgive himself for not at first sight + recognizing his old friend. I believe myself that hunger was to blame, and + not Clare. + </p> + <p> + The men stood about the animal, uncertain what to do, as he struggled with + his horns, and heaved and tore at the wheel to get them out of it, the + roars and howls and inarticulate curses going on all the time. The + elephant must have been tired, to stand so and do nothing! For a moment + Clare could not get near enough. He was afraid to call him while the bull + could not see him: Nimrod might but struggle the more, in order to get to + him! + </p> + <p> + Up rushed a fellow, white with rage and running, bang into the middle of + the spectators, and shook the knot of them asunder. It was one of the two + men from whom Nimrod had broken. He had a pitchfork in his hands which he + proceeded to level. Clare flung his weight against him, threw up his fork, + shoved him aside, and got close to the maddened animal. It was his past + come again! How often had he not interfered to protect Nimrod—and + his would-be masters also! With instinctive, unconscious authority, he + held up his hand to the little crowd. + </p> + <p> + “Leave him alone,” he cried. “I know him; I can manage him! Please do not + interfere. He is an old friend of mine.” + </p> + <p> + They saw that the bull was already still: he had recognized the boy's + voice! They kept his furious attendant back, and looked on in anxious hope + while Clare went up to the animal. + </p> + <p> + “Nimrod!” he whispered, laying a hand on one of the creature's horns, and + his cheek against his neck. + </p> + <p> + Nimrod stood like a bull in bronze. + </p> + <p> + “I'm going to get your horns out, Nimrod,” murmured Clare, and laid hold + of the other with a firm grasp. “You must let me do as I like, you know, + Nimrod!” + </p> + <p> + His voice evidently soothed the bull. + </p> + <p> + By the horns Clare turned his head now one way, now another, Nimrod not + once resisting push or pull. In a moment more he would have them clear, + for one of them was already free. Holding on to the latter, Clare turned + to the bystanders. + </p> + <p> + “You mustn't touch him,” he said, “or I won't answer for him. And you + mustn't let either of those men there”—for the second of Nimrod's + attendants had by this time come up—“interfere with him or me. They + let him go because they couldn't manage him. He can't bear them; and if he + were to break loose from them again, it might be quite another affair! + Then he might distrust me!” + </p> + <p> + The menagerie men turned, and looking saw that the man with the pitchfork + had revenge in his heart. They gave him to understand that he must mind + what he was about, or it would be the worse for him. The man scowled and + said nothing. + </p> + <p> + Clare gently released the other horn, but kept his hold of the first, + moving the creature's head by it, this way and that. A moment more and he + turned his face to the company, which had scattered a little. When the + inflamed eyes of Nimrod came into view, they scattered wider. Clare still + made the bull feel his hand on his horn, and kept speaking to him gently + and lovingly. Nimrod eyed his enemies, for such plainly he counted them, + as if he wished he were a lion that he might eat as well as kill them. At + the same time he seemed to regard them with triumph, saying in his big + heart, “Ha! ha! you did not know what a friend I had! Here he is, come in + the nick of time! I thought he would!” Clare proceeded to untie the ropes + from the ring in his nose. The man with the pitchfork interfered. + </p> + <p> + “That wonnot do!” he said, and laid his hand on Clare's arm. “Would you + send him ramping over the country, and never a hold to have on him?” + </p> + <p> + “It wasn't much good when you had a hold on him—was it now?” + returned the boy. “Where do you want to take him?” + </p> + <p> + “That's my business,” answered the man sulkily. + </p> + <p> + “I fancy you'll find it's mine!” returned Clare. “But there he is! Take + him.” + </p> + <p> + The man hesitated. + </p> + <p> + “Then leave me to manage him,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + A murmur of approbation arose. The caravan people felt he knew what he was + saying. They believed he had power with the bull. + </p> + <p> + While yet he was untying the first of the ropes from the animal's bleeding + nostrils, Clare's fingers all at once refused further obedience, his eyes + grew dim, and he fell senseless at the bull's feet. + </p> + <p> + “Don't tell Nimrod!” he murmured as he fell. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, that explains it!” cried the man with the pitchfork to his mate. “He + knows the cursed brute!” For Clare had hitherto spoken his name to the + bull as if it were a secret between them. + </p> + <p> + Neither had the sense to perceive that the explanation lay in the bull's + knowing Clare, not in Clare's knowing the bull. They made haste to lay + hold of the ropes. Nimrod stood motionless, looking down on his friend, + now and then snuffing at the pale face, which the thorough-bred mongrel, + Abdiel, kept licking continuously. Noses of bull and dog met without + offence on the loved human countenance. But had the men let the bull feel + the ropes, that moment he would have been raging like a demon. + </p> + <p> + The men of the caravan, admiring both Clare's influence over the animal + and his management of him, grateful also for what he had done for them, + hastened to his help. When they had got him to take a little brandy, he + sat up with a wan smile, but presently fell sideways on his elbow, and so + to the ground again. + </p> + <p> + “It's nothing,” he murmured; “it's only I'm rather hungry.” + </p> + <p> + “Poor boy!” said a woman, who had followed her brandy from the + house-caravan, afraid it might disappear in occult directions, “when did + you have your last feed?” + </p> + <p> + She stood looking down on the white face, almost between the fore-feet of + the bull. + </p> + <p> + “I had a piece of bread yesterday afternoon, ma'am,” faltered Clare, + trying to look up at her. + </p> + <p> + “Bless my soul!” she cried, “who's been a murderin' of you, child?” + </p> + <p> + She thought he was in company with the two men; and they had been + ill-treating him. + </p> + <p> + “I can't get any work, ma'am, so I don't want much to eat. Now I think of + it, I believe it was the gladness of seeing an old friend again, and not + the hunger, that made me feel so queer all at once.” + </p> + <p> + “Where's your friend?” she asked, looking round the assembly. + </p> + <p> + “There he is!” answered Clare, putting up his hand, and stroking the big + nose that was right over his face. + </p> + <p> + “Couldn't you rise now?” said the woman, after a moment's silent regard of + him. + </p> + <p> + “I'll try, ma'am; I don't feel quite sure.” + </p> + <p> + “I want you to come into the house, and have a good square meal.” + </p> + <p> + “If you would be so kind, ma'am, as let me have a bit of bread here! + Nimrod would not like me to leave him. He loves me, ma'am, and if I went + away, he might be troublesome. Those men will never do anything with him: + he doesn't like them! They've been rough to him, I don't doubt. Not that I + wonder at that, for he is a terrible beast to most people. They used to + say he never was good with anybody but me. I suppose he knew I cared for + him!” + </p> + <p> + His eyes closed again. The woman made haste to get him something. In a few + minutes she returned with a basin of broth. He took it eagerly, but with a + look of gratitude that went to her heart Before he tasted it, however, he + set it on the ground, broke in half the great piece of bread she had + brought with it, and gave the larger part to his dog. Then he ate the + other with his broth, and felt better than for many a day. Some of the men + said he could not be very hungry to give a cur like that so much of his + dinner; but the evil thought did not enter the mind of the woman. + </p> + <p> + “You'd better be taking your beast away,” said the woman, who by this time + understood the affair, to the two men. + </p> + <p> + They were silent, evidently disinclined for such another tussle. + </p> + <p> + “You'd better be going,” she said again. “If anything should happen with + that animal of yours, and one of ours was to get loose, the devil would be + to pay, and who'd do it?” + </p> + <p> + “They'd better wait for me, ma'am,” said Clare, rising. “I'm just ready!—They + won't tell me where they want to take him, but it's all one, so long as + I'm with him. He's my friend!—Ain't you, Nimrod? We'll go together—won't + we, Nimrod?” + </p> + <p> + While he spoke, he undid the ropes from the ring in the bull's nose. + Gathering them up, he handed them politely to one of the men, and the next + moment sprang upon the bull's back, just behind his shoulders, and leaning + forward, stroked his horns and neck. + </p> + <p> + “Give me up the dog, please,” he said. + </p> + <p> + The owner of the menagerie himself did as Clare requested. All stood and + stared, half expecting to see him flung from the creature's back, and + trampled under his hoofs. Even Nimrod, however, would not easily have + unseated Clare, who could ride anything he had ever tried, and had tried + everything strong enough to carry him, from a pig upward. But Nimrod was + far from wishing to unseat his friend, who with hands and legs began to + send him toward the road. + </p> + <p> + “Are you going that way?” he asked, pointing. The men answered him with a + nod, sulky still. + </p> + <p> + “Don't go with those men,” said the woman, coming up to the side of the + bull, and speaking in a low voice. “I don't like the look of them.” + </p> + <p> + “Nimrod will be on my side, ma'am,” answered Clare. “They would never have + got him home without me. They don't understand their fellow-creatures.” + </p> + <p> + “I'm afraid you understand your fellow-creatures, as you call them, better + than you do your own kind!” + </p> + <p> + “I think they are my own kind, ma'am. That is how they know me, and do + what I want them to do.” + </p> + <p> + “Stay with us,” said the woman coaxingly, still speaking low. “You'll have + plenty of your fellow-creatures about you then!” + </p> + <p> + “Thank you, ma'am, a thousand times!” answered Clare, his face beaming; + “but I couldn't leave poor Nimrod to do those men a mischief, and be + killed for it!” + </p> + <p> + “You'd have plenty to eat and drink, and som'at for your pocket!” + persisted the woman. + </p> + <p> + “I know I should have everything I wanted!” answered Clare, “and I'm very + thankful to you, ma'am. But you see there's always something, somehow, + that's got to be done before the other thing!” + </p> + <p> + Here the master came up. He had himself been thinking the boy would be a + great acquisition, and guessed what his wife was about; but he was afraid + she might promise too much for services that ought to be had cheap. Few + scruple to take advantage of the misfortune of another to get his service + cheap. It is the economy of hell. + </p> + <p> + “I sha'n't feel safe till that bull of yours is a mile off!” he said. + </p> + <p> + “Come along, Nimrod!” answered Clare, always ready with the responsive + deed. + </p> + <p> + Away went Nimrod, gentle as a lamb. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0043" id="link2HCH0043"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XLIII. Across country. + </h2> + <p> + The two men came after at their ease. No sooner was Nimrod on the road, + however, than he began to quicken his pace. He quickened it fast, and + within a minute or so was trotting swiftly along. The men ran panting and + shouting behind. The more they shouted, the faster Nimrod went. Ere long + he was out of their sight, though Clare could hear them cursing and + calling for a time. + </p> + <p> + He had endeavoured to stop Nimrod, but the bull seemed to have made up his + mind that he had obeyed enough for one day. He did not heed a word Clare + said to him, but kept on and on at a swinging trot. Clare would have + jumped off had he been sure the proceeding would stop him; but, now that + he would not obey him, he feared lest, in doing so, he might let him loose + on the country, when there was no saying what mischief he might not work. + On the other hand, he felt sure that he could restrain him from violence, + though he might not prevent his frolicking. He must therefore keep his + seat. + </p> + <p> + For a few miles Nimrod was content with the highway, now trotting + beautifully, now breaking into a canter. But all at once he turned at + right angles in the middle of the road, cleared the skirting fence like a + hunter, and took a bee-line across the fields. Compelled sometimes to + abandon it, he showed great judgment in choosing the place at which to get + out of the enclosure, or cross the natural obstruction. On and on he went, + over hedge after hedge, through field after field, until Clare began to + wonder where all the people in the world had got to. Then a strange + feeling gradually came over him. Surely at some time or other he had seen + the meadow he was crossing! Was he asleep, and dreaming the jolly ride he + was having on Nimrod's back? What a strong creature Nimrod was! Would he + never be tired? How oddly he felt! Were his senses going from him? It was + like the strangest mixture of a bad dream and a good! + </p> + <p> + There seemed at length no further room for doubt or mistake. Everything + was in its place! It was plain why Nimrod was so obstinate! The dear old + fellow was carrying him back to where they had been together so many happy + days! They were nigh Mr. Goodenough's farm, and making straight for it! + How strange it was! he had felt himself a measureless distance from it! + But in his wandering he had taken many turns he did not heed, and Nimrod + had come the shortest way. Delight filled his heart at the thought of + seeing once more the places where his father and mother seemed yet to + live. But instantly came the thought of Maly, and drowned the other + thought in bitterness. Then he felt how worthless place is, when those who + made it dear are gone. Father and mother are home—not the house we + were born in! + </p> + <p> + They were soon upon the farm where once he had abundance of labour, + abundance to eat, and abundance of lowly friendship. Nimrod was making for + his old stable. He was weary now, and breathing heavily, though not at all + spent. Was he dreaming of a golden age, in which Clare should be ever at + his beck and call? + </p> + <p> + Clare had little inclination to encounter any of the people of the farm. + He would indeed have been glad, from a little way off, to get a sight of + his once friend and master, the farmer himself; and very gladly would he + have gone into the stable in the hope of a greeting from old Jonathan; but + he would not willingly meet “the mistress!” Nimrod should take him to his + old stall; there he would tie him up, and flee from the place! The evening + was now come, and in the dusk he would escape unseen. + </p> + <p> + When they reached Nimrod's door, they found it closed; and Clare, stiff + enough by this time, slipped off to open it. Nimrod began to paw the + stones, and blow angry puffs from his wounded nose. When Clare got the + door open, he saw, to his confusion, a vague dark bulk, another bull, in + Nimrod's stall! The roar that simultaneously burst from each was + ferocious, and down went Nimrod's head to charge. It was a terrible moment + for Clare: the new bull was fast by the head, and, unable to turn it to + his adversary, would be gored to death almost in a moment! He could not + let Nimrod be guilty of such unfairness! And the mistress would think he + had brought him back for the very purpose! He all but jumped on the horns + of his friend, making him yield just ground enough for the shutting of the + door. He knew well, however, that not three such doors in one would keep + Nimrod from an enemy. With his back to it he stood facing him and talking + to him, and all the while they heard the bull inside struggling to get + free. He stood between two horned rages, only a chain and a plank betwixt + him and the one at his back, with which he had no influence. A coward + would have escaped, and left the two bullies to settle between them which + had the better right to the stall—not without blood, almost as + certainly not without loss of life, perhaps human as well as bovine. But + Clare was made of other stuff. + </p> + <p> + Before he could get Nimrod away, the bellowing brought out the farmer. All + his men had gone to the village; only himself and his wife were at home. + </p> + <p> + “What's got the brute?” he cried on the threshold, but instantly began to + run, for he saw through the gathering darkness a darker shape he knew, + roaring and pawing at the door of his old quarters, and a boy standing + between him and it, with marvellous courage in mortal danger. He + understood at once that Nimrod had broken loose and come back. But when he + came near enough to recognize Clare, astonishment, and something more + sacred than astonishment, held him dumb. Ever since the unjust blow that + sent the boy from him, his heart had been aware of a little hollow of + remorse in it. Now all his former relations with him while his adoptive + father yet lived, came back upon him. He remembered him dressed like the + little gentleman he always was—and there he stood, the same gentle + fearless creature, in absolute rags! If his wife saw him! The farmer had + no fear of Nimrod in his worst rages, but he feared his wife in her + gentlest moods. Happily for both, a critical moment in the cooking of the + supper had arrived. + </p> + <p> + “Clare!” he stammered. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, sir,” returned Clare, and laid hold of Nimrod's horn. The animal + yielded, and turned away with him. The farmer came nearer, and put his arm + round the boy's neck. The boy rubbed his cheek against the arm. + </p> + <p> + “I'm sorry I struck you, Clare!” faltered the big man. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, never mind, sir! That was long ago!” answered the boy. + </p> + <p> + “Tell me how you've been getting on.” + </p> + <p> + “Pretty well, sir! But I want to tell you first how it is I'm here with + Nimrod. Only it would be better to put him somewhere before I begin.” + </p> + <p> + “It would,” agreed the farmer; and between them, with the enticements of a + pail of water and some fresh-cut grass, they got him into a shed, where + they hoped he would forget the proximity of the usurper, and, with the + soothing help of his supper, go to sleep. + </p> + <p> + Then Clare told his story. Mr Goodenough afterward asseverated that, if he + had not known him for a boy that would not lie, he would not have believed + the half of it. + </p> + <p> + “Come, Abdiel!” said Clare, the moment he ended—and would have + started at once. + </p> + <p> + “Won't you have something after your long ride?” said the farmer. + </p> + <p> + Clare looked down at his clothes, and laughed. The farmer knew what he + meant, and did not ask him into the house. + </p> + <p> + “When had you anything to eat?” he inquired. + </p> + <p> + “I shall do very well till to-morrow,” answered Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Then if you will go, I'm glad of the opportunity of paying you the wages + I owed you,” said the farmer, putting his hand in his pocket. + </p> + <p> + “You gave me my food! That was all I was worth!” protested Clare. + </p> + <p> + “You were worth more than that! I knew the difference when I had another + boy in your place! I wish I had you again!—But it wouldn't do, you + know! it wouldn't do!” he added hastily. + </p> + <p> + With that he succeeded in pulling a sovereign from the depth of a + trowser-pocket, and held it out to Clare. It was neither large wages nor a + greatly generous gift, but it seemed to the boy wealth enormous. He could + not help holding out his hand, but he was ashamed to open it. What the + giver regarded as a debt, the receiver regarded as a gift. He stood with + his hand out but clenched. There was a combat inside him. + </p> + <p> + “It's too much!” he protested, looking at the sovereign almost with fear. + “I never had so much money in my life!” + </p> + <p> + “You earned it well,” said the farmer magnanimously. + </p> + <p> + The moral cramp forsook his hand. He took the money with a hearty “Thank + you, sir.” As he put it in his pocket, he felt its corners carefully, lest + there should be a hole. But his pockets had not had half the wear of the + clothes they inhabited. + </p> + <p> + “Where are you going?” asked the farmer. + </p> + <p> + Clare mentioned the small town in whose neighbourhood he had left the + caravans, and said he thought the people of the menagerie would like him + to help them with the beasts. The farmer shook his head. + </p> + <p> + “It's not a respectable occupation!” he remarked. + </p> + <p> + Clare did not understand him. + </p> + <p> + “Do they cheat?” he asked. + </p> + <p> + “No; I don't suppose they cheat worse than anybody else. But it ain't + respectable.” + </p> + <p> + Had he known a little more, Clare might have asserted that the men about + the menagerie were at least as respectable as almost any farmer with a + horse to sell. But he knew next to nothing of wickedness, whence many a + man whose skull he had brains enough to fill three times, regarded him as + a simpleton. + </p> + <p> + Clare thought everything honest honourable. When people said otherwise, he + did not understand, and continued to act according as he understood. A + thousand dishonourable things are done, and largely approved, which Clare + would not have touched with one of his fingers: he could see nothing more + dishonourable in having to do with wild beasts than in having to do with + tame ones. If any boy wants to know the sort of thing I count in that + thousand, I answer him—“The next thing you are asked to do, or are + inclined to do—if you have any doubt about it, DON'T DO IT.” That is + the way to know the honourable thing from the dishonourable. + </p> + <p> + Clare made no attempt to argue the question with the farmer. He inquired + of him the nearest way to the town, and went—the quicker that he + heard the voice of Mrs. Goodenough, calling her husband to supper. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0044" id="link2HCH0044"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XLIV. A third mother. + </h2> + <p> + Who ever had a sovereign for the first time in his life, and did not feel + rich? Clare trudged along merrily, and Abdiel shared his joy. They had to + sleep out of doors nevertheless; for by this time Clare knew that a boy, + especially a boy in rags, must mind whom he asks to change a sovereign. In + the lee of a hay-mow, on a little loose hay, they slept, Abdiel in Clare's + bosom, and slept well. + </p> + <p> + There was not much temptation to lie long after waking, and the companions + were early on their way. It was yet morning when they came to the public + house where Clare had his first and last half-pint of beer. The landlady + stood at the newly opened door, with her fists in her sides, looking out + on the fresh world, lost in some such thought as was possible to her. + Clare pulled off his cap, and bade her good morning as he passed. Perhaps + she knew she did not deserve politeness; anyhow she took Clare's for + impudence, and came swooping upon him. He stopped and waited her approach, + perplexed as to the cause of it; and was so unprepared for the box on the + ear she dealt him, that it almost threw him down. Her ankle was instantly + in Abdiel's sharp teeth. She gave a frightful screech, and Clare, coming + to himself, though still stupid from her blow and his own surprise, called + off the dog. The woman limped raging to the house, and Clare thought it + prudent to go his way. He talked severely to Abdiel as they went; but + though the dog could understand much, I doubt if he understood that + lecture. For Abdiel was one of the few, even among dogs, with whom the + defence of master or friend is an inborn, instinctive duty; and strong + temptation even has but a poor chance against the sense of duty in a dog. + </p> + <p> + It was night when they entered the town. They were already a weary pair + when the far sounds of the brass band of the menagerie, mostly made up of + attendants on the animals, first entered their ears. The marketing was + over; the band was issuing its last invitation to the merry-makers to walk + up and see strange sights; its notes were just dying to their close, when + the wayfarers arrived at the foot of the steps leading to the platform + where the musicians stood. Clare ascended, and Abdiel crept after him. + </p> + <p> + At a table in a small curtained recess on the platform, sat the mistress + to receive the money of those that entered. Clare laid his sovereign + before her. She took it up without looking at him, but at it she looked + doubtfully. She threw it on her table. It would not ring. She bit it with + her white teeth, and looked at it again; then at length gave a glance at + the person who offered it. Her dull lamp flickered in the puffs of the + night-wind, and she did not recognize Clare. She saw but a white-faced, + ragged boy, and threw him back his sovereign. + </p> + <p> + “Won't pass,” she said with decision, not unmingled with contempt. She sat + at the receipt of money, where too many men and women cease to be ladies + and gentlemen. + </p> + <p> + Clare did not at first understand. He stood motionless and, for the second + time that day, bewildered. How could money be no money? + </p> + <p> + “'Ain't you got sixpence?” she asked. + </p> + <p> + “No, ma'am,” answered Clare. “I haven't had sixpence for many a day.” + </p> + <p> + The moment he spoke, the woman looked him sharply in the face, and knew + him. + </p> + <p> + “Drat my stupid eyes!” she said fervently. “That I shouldn't ha' known + you! Walk in, walk in. Go where you please, and do as you please. You're + right welcome.—Where did you get that sov.?” + </p> + <p> + “From Farmer Goodenough.” + </p> + <p> + “Good enough, I hope, not to take advantage of an innocent prince! Was it + for taking home the bull?” + </p> + <p> + “No, ma'am. I didn't take the bull home. The bull took me to the old home + where we used to be together. He didn't want a new one!” + </p> + <p> + “Well, never mind now. Give me the sovereign. I'll talk to you by and by. + Go in, or the show 'ill be over. Look after your dog, though. We don't + like dogs. He mustn't go in.” + </p> + <p> + “I'll send him right outside, if you wish it, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + “I do.—But will he stay out?” + </p> + <p> + “He will, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + Clare took up Abdiel, and setting him at the top of the steps, told him to + go down and wait. Abdiel went hopping down, like a dirty little white + cataract out on its own hook, turned in under the steps, and deposited + himself there until his master should call him. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0045" id="link2HCH0045"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XLV. The menagerie. + </h2> + <p> + A strange smell was in Clare's nostrils, and as he went down the steps + inside, it grew stronger. He did not dislike it; but it set him thinking + why it should so differ from that of domestic animals. He was presently in + the midst of a vision attractive to all boys, but which few had ever + looked upon with such intelligent wonder as he; for Clare had read and + re-read every book about animals upon which he could lay his hands. He had + a great power too of remembering what he read; for he never let a + description glide away over the outside of his eyes, but always put it + inside his thinking place. What with pictures and descriptions, he seemed + to know, as he looked around him, every animal on which his eyes fell. + </p> + <p> + The area was by no means crowded. There had been many visitors during the + day, but now it was late. He could see into all the cages that formed the + sides of the enclosure. Many of the creatures seemed restless, few sleepy: + night was the waking time for most of them. How should a great roaming, + hunting cat go to sleep in a little cube of darkness! “Oh,” thought Clare, + “how gladly would I help them to bear it! I could bear it myself with + somebody near to be kind to me!” + </p> + <p> + He had begun to feel that the quiet happiness to which he was once so + accustomed that he did not think much about it, was his because it was <i>given</i> + him. He had begun to see that it did not come to him of itself, but from + the love of his father and mother. He had yet to learn that it was given + to them to give to him by the Father of fathers and mothers. But he was + beginning to prize every least kindness shown him. This re-acted on his + desire to make the happiness greater and the pain less everywhere about + him. He had little chance of doing much for people, he thought; but he + knew how to do things for some animals, and perhaps it was only necessary + to know others to be able to do something for them too! + </p> + <p> + Thoughts like these passing through his mind, and his gaze wandering + hither and thither over the shifting shapes, his eyes rested on the tenant + of one of the cages, and his heart immediately grew very sore, for he + seemed unable to lift his head. He was a big animal, alone in his prison, + of a blackish colour, and awkward appearance. He went nearer, and found he + had a big ring in his nose like Nimrod. But to the ring was fastened a + strong chain, and the chain was bolted down to the floor of the cage, + which was of iron covered with boards, in their turn covered with a thick + sheet of lead. The chain was so short that it held the poor creature's + head within about a foot of the floor. He could not lift it higher, or + move it farther on either side; but he kept moving it constantly. It was a + pitiful sight, and Clare went nearer still, drawn far more by compassion, + and indeed sympathy, than by curiosity. He was a terrible brute, a big + grizzly bear, ugly to repulsiveness. The snarling scorn, the sneering, + lip-writhing hate of the demoniacal grin with which he received the boy, + was hideous; the rattling, pebble-jarring growl that came from his + devilish throat was loathing embodied. What if spirits worse than their + own get into some of the creatures by virtue of the likeness between them! + One day will be written, perhaps, a history of animals very different from + any attempted by mere master in zoology. Clare spoke to the beast again + and again, but was unvaryingly answered by the same odious snarl, curling + his lip under his nose-ring. It seemed to express the imagined delight of + tearing him limb from limb. + </p> + <p> + “Poor fellow!” said Clare, “how can he be good-tempered with that + torturing ring and chain! His unalterable position must make his every + bone ache!” + </p> + <p> + But had his nose been set free, such a raging-bear-struggle to get at the + nearest of his fellow-prisoners would have ensued, as must soon have torn + to shreds the partition between them. For he was a beast-bedlamite, an + animal volcano, a furnace of death, an incarnate paroxysm of wrath. The + inspiration of the creature, so far as one could see, was pure hate. + </p> + <p> + The boy turned aside with quivering heart—sore for the grizzly's + nose, and sorer still for the grizzly himself that he was so unfriendly. + </p> + <p> + Right opposite, a creature of a far differing disposition seemed casting + defiance to all the ills of life. As he turned with a sad despair from the + grizzly, Clare caught sight of his pranks, and hastened across the area. + The creature kept bounding from side to side of his cage, agile and + frolicsome as a kitten. But the light was poor, and Clare could not even + conjecture to which of the cat-kinds he belonged. When he came near his + cage, he saw that he was yellowish like a lion, and thought perhaps he + might be a young lion. He had no mane. Clare judged him four feet in + length without the tail—or perhaps four and a half. A little way off + was the real lion—a young one, it is true, but quite grown, with a + thin ruffy mane, and lordly carriage and gaze. It was he whose roar had + challenged Nimrod, giving the topmost flutter to the flame of his wrath. + But Clare was so taken with the frolicsome creature before him, that he + gave but a glance at the grand one as he walked up and down his prison, + and turned again to the merry one disporting himself alone, who seemed to + find the pleasure of life in great games with companions no one saw but + himself. For minutes he stood regarding the gladness of God's creature. A + wild thing of the woods and plains, he made the most of the bars and floor + and roof of his cage. No one careless of liberty could make such bounds as + those; yet he was joyous in closest imprisonment! His liberty gone, his + freedom contracted to a few cubic feet, his space diminished almost to the + mould of his body, the great wild philosopher created his own liberty, + made it out of his own love of it. Like a live, erratic shuttle he went to + and fro, unweaving, unravelling, unwinding, drawing out the knot of + confinement, flinging out, radiating and spreading and breathing out space + in all directions, by multitudinous motion of disentanglement! Space gone + from him, space in the abstract should replace it! He would not be slave + to condition! Space unconditioned should be his! For him liberty should + not lie in space, but in his own soul. Room should be but the poor + out-aide symbol of his inward freedom! He would spin out, he would weave, + he would unroll essential liberty into spiritual space! His mind to him a + kingdom was. Not a grumble, not a snarl! He left discontent to men, to + build their own prisons withal. A proud man with everything he longs for, + if such a man there be, is but a slave; this creature of the glad creator + was and would be free, because he was a free soul. Prison bars could not + touch that by whose virtue he was and would be free! + </p> + <p> + The germ of this thinking was in the mind of Clare while he stood and + gazed; and as he told me the story, its ripeness came thus, or nearly + thus, from his lips; for he had thought much in lonely places. + </p> + <p> + As he gazed and sympathized, there awoke within him that strange + consciousness which my reader must, at one time or another, have known—of + being on the point of remembering something. It was not a memory that + came, but a memory of a memory—the shadow of a memory gone, but + trying to come out from behind a veil—a sense of having once known + something. It gave another aspect to the blessed creature before him. The + creature and himself seemed for a moment to belong together to another + time. Could he have seen such an animal before? He did not think so! He + could never have visited a menagerie and forgotten it! If he had known + such a creature, his after-reading would have recalled it, he would know + it now! He could tell the lion and the tiger and the leopard, although he + seemed to know he had never seen one of them; he could not tell this + animal, and yet—and yet!—what was it? The feeling itself + lasted scarce an instant, and went no farther. No memory came to him. The + foiled expectation was all he had. The very reasoning about it helped to + obliterate the shape of the feeling itself. He could not even recall how + the thing had felt; he could only remember it had been there. It was now + but the shadow of the shadow of a dream—a yet vaguer memory than + that thinnest of presences which had at the first tantalized him. We + remember what we cannot recall. + </p> + <p> + Perhaps the rousing of the odd, fantastic feeling had been favoured by the + slumber beginning to encroach on tody and brain. While he stood looking at + the one creature, all the wonderful creatures began to get mixed up + together, and he thought it better to go and search for some field of + sleep, where he might mow a little for his use. He said good-night to the + great, gentle, jubilant cat, turned from him unwillingly, and went up the + steps. Almost every spectator was gone. At the top of them he turned for a + last look, but could distinguish nothing except the dim form of the young + lion, as he thought him, still gamboling in the presence of his maker. + </p> + <p> + He thought to see the mistress of the menagerie, but she was no longer in + her curtained box. He went out on the deserted platform, and down the + steps. Abdiel was already at the foot when he reached it, wagging his + weary little tail. + </p> + <p> + They set out to look for a shelter. Their search, however, was so much in + vain, that at last they returned and lay down under one of the wagons, on + the hard ground of the public square. Sleeping so often out of doors, he + had never yet taken cold. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0046" id="link2HCH0046"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XLVI. The angel of the wild beasts. + </h2> + <p> + When Clare looked up he saw nothing between him and the sky. They had + dragged the caravan from above him, and he had not moved. Abdiel indeed + waked at the first pull, but had lain as still as a mouse—ready to + rouse his master, but not an instant before it should be necessary. + </p> + <p> + Clare saw the sky, but he saw something else over him, better than the sky—the + face of Mrs. Halliwell, the mistress of the menagerie. In it, as she stood + looking down on him, was compassion, mingled with self-reproach. + </p> + <p> + Clare jumped up, saying, “Good morning, ma'am!” He was yet but half awake, + and staggered with sleep. + </p> + <p> + “My poor boy!” answered the woman, “I sent you to sleep on the cold earth, + with a sovereign of your own in my pocket! I made sure you would come and + ask me for it! You're too innocent to go about the world without a + mother!” + </p> + <p> + She turned her face away. + </p> + <p> + “But, ma'am, you know I couldn't have offered it to anybody,” said Clare. + “It wasn't good!—Besides, before I knew that,” he went on, finding + she did not reply, “there was nobody but you I dared offer it to: they + would have said I stole it—because I'm so shabby!” he added, looking + down at his rags. “But it ain't in the clothes, ma'am—is it?” + </p> + <p> + Getting the better of her feelings for a moment, she turned her face and + said,— + </p> + <p> + “It was all my fault! The sov. is a good one. It's only cracked! I ought + to have known, and changed it for you. Then all would have been well!” + </p> + <p> + “I don't think it would have made any difference, ma'am. We would rather + sleep on the ground than in a bed that mightn't be clean—wouldn't + we, Abby?” The dog gave a short little bark, as he always did when his + master addressed him by his name.—“But I'm so glad!” Clare went on. + “I was sure Mr. Goodenough thought the sovereign all right when he gave it + me!—Were you ever disappointed in a sovereign, ma'am?” + </p> + <p> + “I been oftener disappointed in them as owed 'em!” she answered. “But to + think o' me snug in bed, an' you sleepin' out i' the dark night! I can't + abide the thought on it!” + </p> + <p> + “Don't let it trouble you, ma'am; we're used to it. Ain't we, Abby?” + </p> + <p> + “Then you oughtn't to be! and, please God, you shall be no more! But come + along and have your breakfast We don't start till the last.” + </p> + <p> + “Please, ma'am, may Abdiel come too?” + </p> + <p> + “In course! 'Love me, love my dog!' Ain't that right?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, ma'am; but some people like dogs worse than boys.” + </p> + <p> + “A good deal depends on the dog. When folk brings up their dogs as bad as + they do their childern, I want neither about me. But your dog's a + well-behaved dog. Still, he must learn not to come in sight o' the + animals.” + </p> + <p> + “He will learn, ma'am!—Abdiel, lie down, and don't come till I call + you.” + </p> + <p> + At the word, the dog dropped, and lay. + </p> + <p> + The house-caravan stood a little way off, drawn aside when they began to + break up. They ascended its steps behind, and entered an enchanting little + room. It had muslin curtains to the windows, and a small stove in which + you could see the bright red coals. On the stove stood a coffee-pot and a + covered dish. How nice and warm the place felt, after the nearly + shelterless night! + </p> + <p> + The breakfast-things were still on the table. Mr. Halliwell had had his + breakfast, but Mrs. Halliwell would not eat until she had found the boy. + She had been unhappy about him all the night. Her husband had assured her + the sovereign was a good one, and the boy had told her he had no money but + the sovereign! She little knew how seldom he fared better than that same + night! When he got among hay or straw, that was luxury. + </p> + <p> + They sat down to breakfast, and the good woman was very soon confirmed in + the notion that the boy was a gentleman. + </p> + <p> + “Call your dog now,” she said, “an' let's see if he'll come!” + </p> + <p> + “May I whistle, ma'am?” + </p> + <p> + “Why not!—But will he hear you?” + </p> + <p> + “He has very sharp ears, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + Clare gave a low, peculiar whistle. In a second or two, they heard an + anxious little whine at the door. Clare made haste to open it. There stood + Abdiel, with the words in his eyes, as plain almost as if he spoke them—“Did + you call, sir?” The woman caught him and held him to her bosom. + </p> + <p> + “You blessed little thing!” she said. + </p> + <p> + And surely if there be a blessing to be had, it is for them that obey. + </p> + <p> + Clare heard and felt the horses put-to, but the hostess of this Scythian + house did not rise, and he too went on with his breakfast. When they were + in motion, it was not so easy to eat nicely, but he managed very well. By + the time he had done, they had left the town behind them. He wanted to + help Mrs. Halliwell with the breakfast-things, but whether she feared he + would break some of them, or did not think it masculine work, she would + not allow him. + </p> + <p> + Nothing had been said about his going with them; she had taken that for + granted. Clare began to think perhaps he ought to take his leave: there + was nothing for him to do! He and Abdiel ought at least to get out and + walk, instead of burdening the poor horses with their weight, when they + were so well rested, and had had such a good breakfast! But when he said + so to Mrs. Halliwell, she told him she must have a little talk with him + first, and formally proposed that he should enter their service, and do + whatever he was fit for in the menagerie. + </p> + <p> + “You're not frightened of the beasts, are you?” she said. + </p> + <p> + “Oh no, ma'am; I love them!” answered Clare. “But are you sure Mr. + Halliwell thinks I could be of use?” + </p> + <p> + “Don't you think yourself you could?” asked Mrs. Halliwell. + </p> + <p> + “I know I could, ma'am; but I should not like him to take me just because + he was sorry for me!” + </p> + <p> + “You innocent! People are in no such hurry to help their neighbours. My + husband's as good a man as any going; but it don't mean he would take a + boy because nobody else would have him. A fool of a woman might—I + won't say; but not a man I ever knew. No, no! He saw the way you managed + that bull!—a far more unreasonable creature than any we have to do + with!” + </p> + <p> + “Ah! you don't know Nimrod, ma'am!” + </p> + <p> + “I don't, an' I don't want to!—Such wild animals ought to be put in + caravans!” she added, with a laugh. + </p> + <p> + “Well, ma'am,” said Clare, “if you and Mr. Halliwell are of one mind, + nothing would please me so much as to serve you and the beasts. But I + should like to be sure about it, for where husband and wife are not of one + mind—well, it is uncomfortable!” + </p> + <p> + Thereupon he told her how he had stood with the farmer and his wife; and + from that she led him on through his whole story—not unaccompanied + with tears on the part of his deliverer, for she was a tender-souled as + well as generous and friendly woman. In her heart she rejoiced to think + that the boy's sufferings would now be at an end; and thenceforward she + was, as he always called her, his third mother. + </p> + <p> + “My poor, ill-used child!” she said. “But I'll be a mother to you—if + you'll have me!” + </p> + <p> + “You wouldn't mind if I thought rather often of my two other mothers, + ma'am—would you?” he said. + </p> + <p> + “God forbid, boy!” she answered. “If I were your real mother, would I have + my own flesh and blood ungrateful? Should I be proud of him for loving + nobody but me? That's like the worst of the beasts: they love none but + their little ones—and that only till they're tired of the trouble of + them!” + </p> + <p> + “Thank you! Then I will be your son Clare, please, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + The next time they stopped, she made her husband come into her caravan, + and then and there she would and did have everything arranged. When both + her husband and the boy would have left his wages undetermined, she would + not hear of it, but insisted that so much a week should be fixed at once + to begin with. She had no doubt, she said, that her husband would soon be + ready enough to raise his wages; but he must have his food and five + shillings a week now, and Mr. Halliwell must advance money to get him + decent clothes: he might keep the wages till the clothes were paid for! + </p> + <p> + Everything she wished was agreed to by her husband, and at the next town, + Clare's new mother saw him dressed to her satisfaction, and to his own. + She would have his holiday clothes better than his present part in life + required, and she would not let his sovereign go toward paying for them: + that she would keep ready in case he might want it! Her eyes followed him + about with anxious pride—as if she had been his mother in fact as + she was in truth. + </p> + <p> + He had at once plenty to do. The favour of his mother saved him from no + kind of work, neither had he any desire it should. Every morning he took + his share in cleaning out the cages, and in setting water for the beasts, + and food for the birds and such other creatures as took it when they + pleased. At the proper intervals he fed as many as he might of those + animals that had stated times for their meals; and found the advantage of + this in its facilitating his friendly approaches to them. He helped with + the horses also—with whose harness and ways he was already familiar. + In a very short time he was known as a friend by every civilized animal in + and about the caravans. + </p> + <p> + He did all that was required of him, and more. Not everyone of course had + a right to give him orders, but Clare was not particular as to who wanted + him, or for what. He was far too glad to have work to look at the gift + askance. He did not make trouble of what ought to be none, by saying, with + the spirit of a slave, “It's not my place.” He did many things which he + might have disputed, for he never thought of disputing them. Thus, both + for himself and for others, he saved a great deal of time, and avoided + much annoyance and much quarrelling. Thus also he gained many friends. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0047" id="link2HCH0047"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XLVII. Glum Gunn. + </h2> + <p> + He had but one enemy, and he did not make him such: he was one by nature. + For he was so different from Clare that he disliked him the moment he saw + him, and it took but a day to ripen his dislike into hatred. Like Mr. + Maidstone, he found the innocent fearlessness of Clare's expression + repulsive. His fingers twitched, he said, to have a twist at the + sheep-nose of him. Unhappily for Clare, he was of consequence in the + menagerie, having money in the concern. He was half-brother to the + proprietor, but so unlike him that he might not have had a drop of blood + from the same source. An ill-tempered, imperious man, he would hurt + himself to have his way, for he was the merest slave to what he fancied. + When a man <i>will</i> have a thing, right or wrong, that man is a slave + to that thing—the meanest of slaves, a willing one. He was the + terror of the men beneath him, heeding no man but his brother—and + him only because he knew “he would stand no nonsense.” To his + sister-in-law he was civil: she was his brother's wife, and his brother + was proud of her! Also he knew that she was perfect in her part of the + business. So it was reason to stand as well as he might with her! + </p> + <p> + Clare had no suspicion that he more than disliked him. It took him days + indeed to discover even that he did not love him—notwithstanding the + bilious eye which, when its owner was idle, kept constantly following him. + And idle he often was, not from laziness, but from the love of ordering + about, and looking superior. + </p> + <p> + It was natural that such a man should also be cruel. There are who find + their existence pleasant in proportion as they make that of others + miserable. He had no liking for any of the animals, regarding them only as + property with never a right;—as if God would make anything live + without thereby giving it rights! To Glum Gunn, as he was commonly called + behind his back, the animals were worth so much money to sell, and so much + to show. Yet he prided himself that he had a great influence as well as + power over them, an occult superiority that made him their lord. It was + merely a phase of the vulgarest self-conceit. He posed to himself as a + lion-tamer! He had never tamed a lion, or any creature else, in his life; + but when he had a wild thing safe within iron bars, then he “let him know + who was his master!” By the terror of his whip, and means far worse, he + compelled obedience. The grizzly alone, of the larger animals, he never + interfered with. + </p> + <p> + From the first he received Clare's “<i>Good-morning, sir</i>,” with a + silent stare; and the boy at last, thinking he did not like to be so + greeted, gave up the salutation. This roused Gunn's anger and increased + his hate. But indeed any boy petted by his sister-in-law, would have been + odious to him; and any boy whatever would have found him a hard master. + Clare was for a while protected by the man's unreadiness to have words + with his brother, who always took his wife's part; but the tyrant soon + learned that he might venture far. + </p> + <p> + For he saw, by the boy's ready smile, that he never resented anything, + which the brute, as most boys would have done, attributed to cowardice; + and he learned that he never carried tales to his sister, of which, + instead of admiring him for his reticence, he took advantage, and set + about making life bitter to him. + </p> + <p> + It was some time before he began to succeed, for Clare was hard to annoy. + Patient, and right ready to be pleased, he could hardly imagine offence + intended; the thought was all but unthinkable to Clare's nature; so he let + evil pass and be forgotten as if it had never been. Once, as he ran along + with a heavy pail of water, Gunn shot out his foot and threw him down: he + rose with a cut in his forehead, and a smile on his lips. He carried the + mark of the pail as long as he carried his body, but it was long before he + believed he had been tripped up. Had it been proved to him at the time, he + would have taken it as a joke, intending no hurt. He did not see the lurid + smile on the man's face as he turned away, a smile of devilish delight at + the discomfiture of a hated fellow-creature. Gunn put him to the dirtiest + work—only to find that it did not trouble him: the boy was a rare + gentleman—unwilling another should have more that he might have less + of the disagreeable. I have two or three times heard him say that no man + had the right to require of another the thing he would think degrading to + himself. He said he learned this from the New Testament. “But,” he said, + “nothing God has made necessary, can possibly be degrading. It may not be + the thing for this or that man, at this or that time, to do, but it cannot + in itself be degrading.” + </p> + <p> + The boy had to take his turn with several in acting showman to the gazing + crowd, and by and by the part fell to him oftenest. Each had his own way + of filling the office. One would repeat his information like a lesson in + which he was not interested, and expected no one else to be interested. + Another made himself the clown of the exhibition, and joked as much and as + well as he could. Gunn delighted in telling as many lies as he dared: he + must not be suspected of making fools of his audience! Clare, who from + books knew far more than any of the others concerning the creatures in + their wild state, and who, by watching them because he loved them, had + already noted things none of the others had observed, and was fast + learning more, talked to the spectators out of his own sincere and warm + interest, giving them from his treasure things new and old—things he + had read, and things he had for himself discovered. Group after group of + simple country people would listen intently as he led them round, eager + after every word; and as any peg will do to hang hate upon, even this + success was noted with evil eye by Glum Gunn. Almost anything served to + increase his malignity. Whether or not it grew the faster that he had as + yet found no wider outlet for it, I cannot tell. + </p> + <p> + At last, however, the tyrant learned how to inflict the keenest pain on + the tender-hearted boy, counting him the greater idiot that he could so + “be got at,” as he phrased it, and promising himself much enjoyment from + the discovery. But he did not know—how should he know—what + love may compel! + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0048" id="link2HCH0048"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XLVIII. The puma. + </h2> + <p> + I need hardly say that by this time all the beasts with any friendliness + in them had for Clare a little more than their usual amount of that + feeling. But there was one between whom and him—I prefer <i>who</i> + to <i>which</i> for certain animals—a real friendship had begun at + once, and had grown and ripened rapidly till it was strong on both sides. + Clare's new friend—and companion as much as circumstance permitted—was + the same whose lonely gambols had so much attracted him the night he first + entered the menagerie. The animal, whom Clare had taken for a young lion—without + being so far wrong, for he has often been called the American lion—was + the puma, or couguar, peculiar to America, with a relation to the jaguar, + also American, a little similar to that of the lion to the tiger. But + while the jaguar is as wicked a beast as the tiger, the puma possesses, in + relation to man, far more than the fabulous generosity of the lion. Like + every good creature he has been misunderstood and slandered, but a few + have known him, He has doubtless degenerated in districts, for as the wild + animal must gradually disappear before the human, he cannot help becoming + in the process less friendly to humanity; but an essential and distinctive + characteristic of the puma is his love for the human being—a love + persistent, devoted, and long-suffering. + </p> + <p> + Between such an animal and Clare, it is not surprising that friendship + should at once have blossomed. He stroked the paw of the Indian lion the + first morning, but the day was not over when he was stroking the cheek of + the puma; while all he could do with the grizzly at the end of the month + was to feed him a little on the sly, and get for thanks a growl of the + worse hate. There are men that would soonest tear their benefactors, + loathing them the more that they cannot get at them. I suspect that in + some mysterious way Glum Gunn and the bear were own brothers. With the + elephant Clare did what he pleased—never pleasing anything that was + not pleasing to the elephant. + </p> + <p> + They came to a town where they exhibited every day for a week, and there + it was that the friendship of Clare and the puma reached its perfection. + One night the boy could not sleep, and drawn by his love, went down among + the cages to see how his fellow-creatures were getting through the time of + darkness. There was just light enough from a small moon to show the dim + outlines of the cages, and the motion without the form of any moving + animal. The puma, in his solitary yet joyous gymnastics, was celebrating + the rites of freedom according to his custom. When Clare entered, he made + a peculiar purring noise, and ceased his amusement—a game at ball, + with himself for the ball. Clare went to him, and began as usual to stroke + him on the face and nose; whereupon the puma began to lick his hand with + his dry rough tongue. Clare wondered how it could be nice to have such a + dry thing always in his mouth, but did not pity him for what God had given + him. He had his arm through between the bars of the cage, and his face + pressed close against them, when suddenly the face of the animal was + rubbing itself against what it could reach of his. The end was, that Clare + drew aside the bolt of the cage-door, and got in beside the puma. The + creature's gladness was even greater than if he had found a friend of his + own kind. Noses and cheeks and heads were rubbed together; tongue licked, + and hand stroked and scratched. Then they began to frolic, and played a + long time, the puma jumping over Clare, and Clare, afraid to jump lest he + should make a noise, tumbling over the puma. The boy at length went fast + asleep; and in the morning found the creature lying with his head across + his body, wide awake but motionless, as if guarding him from disturbance. + Nobody was stirring; and Clare, who would not have their friendship + exposed to every comment, crept quietly from the cage, and went to his own + bed. + </p> + <p> + The next night, as soon as the place was quiet, Clare went down, and had + another game with the puma. Before their sport was over, he had begun to + teach him some of the tricks he had taught Abdiel; but he could not do + much for fear of making a noise and alarming some keeper. + </p> + <p> + The same thing took place, as often as it was possible, for some weeks, + and Clare came to have as much confidence, in so far at least as good + intention was concerned, in the puma as in Abdiel. If only he could have + him out of the cage, that the dear beast might have a little taste of old + liberty! But not being certain how the puma would behave to others, or if + he could then control him, he felt he had no right to release him. + </p> + <p> + Now and then he would fall asleep in the cage, whereupon the puma would + always lie down close beside him. Whether the puma slept, I do not know. + </p> + <p> + On one such occasion, Clare started to his feet half-awake, roused by a + terrific roar. Right up on end stood the couguar, flattening his front + against the bars of the cage, which he clawed furiously, snarling and + spitting and yelling like the huge cat he was, every individual hair on + end, and his eyes like green lightning. Clatter, clatter, went his great + feet on the iron, as he tore now at this bar now at that, to get at + something out in the dim open space. It was too dark for Clare to see what + it was that thus infuriated him, but his ear discovered what his eye could + not. For now and then, woven into the mad noise of the wild creature, in + which others about him were beginning to join, he heard the modest whimper + of a very tame one—Abdiel, against whose small person, gladly as he + would have been “naught a while,” this huge indignation was levelled. Must + there not be a deeper ground for the enmity of dogs and cats than evil + human incitement? Their antipathy will have to be explained in that + history of animals which I have said must one day be written. + </p> + <p> + Clare had taken much pains to make Abdiel understand that he was not to + intrude where his presence was not desired—that the show was not for + him, and thought the dog had learned perfectly that never on any pretence, + or for any reason, was he to go down those steps, however often he saw his + master go down. This prohibition was a great trial to Abdiel's loving + heart, but it had not until this night been a trial too great for his + loving will. + </p> + <p> + When Clare left him, he thought he had taken his usual pains in shutting + him into a small cage he had made to use on such occasions, lest he might + be tempted to think, when he saw nobody about, that the law no longer + applied. But he had not been careful enough; and Abdiel, sniffing about + and finding his door unfastened, had interpreted the fact as a sign that + he might follow his master. Hence all the coil. For pumas—whereby + also must hang an explanation in that book of zoology, have an intense + hatred of dogs. Tame from cubhood, they never get over their antipathy to + them. With pumas it is “Love you, hate your dog.” In the present case + there could be no individual jealousy, of which passion beasts and birds + are very capable, for Pummy had never seen Abby before. There may be in + the puma an inborn jealousy of dogs, as a race more favoured than pumas by + the man whom yet they love perhaps more passionately. + </p> + <p> + As soon as Clare saw what the matter was, he slipped out of the cage, and + catching up the obnoxious offender—where he stood wagging all over + as if his entire body were but a self-informed tail—sped with him to + his room, and gave him a serious talking-to. + </p> + <p> + The puma was quiet the moment the dog was out of his sight. Doubtless he + regarded Clare as his champion in distress, and blessed him for the + removal of that which his soul hated. But, alas, mischief was already + afoot! Gunn, waked by the roaring, came flying with his whip, and the + remnants of poor Pummy's excitement were enough to betray him to the eyes + of the tamer of caged animals. Clare would have recognized by the roar + itself the individual in trouble; but Glum Gunn had little knowledge even + of the race. He counted the couguar a coward, because he showed no + resentment. A man may strike him or wound him, and he will make no + retaliation; he will even let a man go on to kill him, and make no defence + beyond moans and tears. But Gunn knew nothing of these facts; he only knew + that this puma would not touch <i>him</i>. He was not aware that if he + turned the two into the arena of the show, the puma would kill the + grizzly; or that in their own country, the puma persecutes the jaguar as + if he hated him for not being like himself, the friend of man: the Gauchos + of the Pampas call him “The Christians' Friend.” Gunn did not even know + that the horse is the puma's favourite food: he will leap on the back of a + horse at full speed, with his paws break his neck as he runs, and come + down with him in a rolling heap. Neither did he know that, while + submissive to man—as if the maker of both had said to him, “Slay my + other creatures, but do my anointed no harm,”—he could yet upon + occasion be provoked to punish though not to kill him. + </p> + <p> + Glum Gunn rushed across the area, jumped into the cage of the puma, and + began belabouring him with his whip. The beast whimpered and wept, and the + brute belaboured him. Clare heard the changed cry of his friend, and came + swooping like the guardian angel he was. When he saw the patient creature + on his haunches like a dog, accepting Gunn's brutality without an attempt + to escape it—except, indeed, by dodging any blows at his head so + cleverly that the ruffian could not once hit it—he bounded to the + cage, wild with anger and pity. But Gunn stood with his back against the + door of it, and he was reduced to entreaty. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, sir! sir!” he cried, in a voice full of tears; “it was all my fault! + Abby came to look for me, and I didn't know Pummy disliked dogs!” + </p> + <p> + “Do you tell me, you rascal, that you were down among the hanimals when I + supposed you in your bed?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, sir, I was. I didn't know there was any harm. I wasn't doing + anything wrong.” + </p> + <p> + “Hold your jaw! What <i>was</i> you doing?” + </p> + <p> + “I was only in the cage with the puma.” + </p> + <p> + “You was! You have the impudence to tell me that to my face! I'll teach + you, you cotton-face! you milk-pudding! to go corrupting the hanimals and + making them not worth their salt!” + </p> + <p> + He swung himself out of the cage-door in a fury, but Clare, with his + friend in danger, would not run. The wretch seized him by the collar, and + began to lash him as he had been lashing the puma. Happily he was too + close to him to give him such stinging blows. + </p> + <p> + With the first hiss of the thong, came a tearing screech from the puma, as + he flung himself in fury upon the door of his cage. Gunn in his wrath with + Clare had forgotten to bolt it. Dragging with his claws, he found it + unfastened, pulled it open, and like a huge shell from a mortar, shot + himself at Gunn. Down he went. For one moment the puma stood over him, + swinging his tail in great sweeps, and looking at him, doubtless with + indignation. Then before Clare could lay hold of him, for Clare too had + fallen by the onset, Pummy turned a scornful back upon his enemy, and + walking away with a slow, careless stride, as if he were not worth + thinking of more, leaped into his cage, and lay down. The thing passed so + swiftly that Clare did not see him touch the man with his paw, and thought + he had but thrown him down with his weight. The beast, however, had not + left the brute without the lesson he needed; he had given him just one + little pat on the side of the head. + </p> + <p> + Gunn rose staggering. The skin and something more was torn down his cheek + from the temple almost to the chin, and the blood was streaming. Clare + hastened to help him, but he flung him aside, muttering with an oath, + “I'll make you pay for this!” and went out, holding his head with both + hands. + </p> + <p> + Clare went and shot the bolt of the cage. Pummy sprang up. His tail and + swift-shifting feet showed eager expectation of a romp. He had already + forgotten the curling lash of the terrible whip! But Clare bade him + good-night with a kiss through the bars. + </p> + <p> + Glum Gunn kept his bed for more than a week. When at length he appeared, a + demonstration of the best art of the surgeon of the town, he was not + beautiful to look upon. To the end of his evil earthly days he bore an + ugly scar; and neither his heart nor his temper were the better for his + well deserved punishment. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Halliwell questioned Clare about the whole thing, inquiring further + and further as his answers suggested new directions. Her catechism ended + with a partial discovery of Gunn's behaviour to her <i>protegé</i>, whom + she loved the more that he had been so silent concerning it. She stood + perturbed. One moment her face flushed with anger, the next turned pale + with apprehension. She bit her lip, and the tears came in her eyes. + </p> + <p> + “Never mind, mother,” said Clare, who saw no reason for such emotion; “I'm + not afraid of him.” + </p> + <p> + “I know you're not, sonny,” she answered; “but that don't make me the less + afraid for you. He's a bad man, that brother-in-law of mine! I fear he'll + do you a mischief. I'm afraid I did wrong in taking you! I ought to have + done what I could for you without keeping you about me. We can't get rid + of him because he's got money in the business. Not that he's part owner—I + don't mean that! If we'd got the money handy, we'd pay him off at once!” + </p> + <p> + “I don't care about myself,” said Clare. “I don't mean I like to be + kicked, but it don't make me miserable. What I can't bear is to see him + cruel to the beasts. I love the beasts, mother—even cross old + Grizzly.—But Mr. Gunn don't meddle much with <i>him</i>!” + </p> + <p> + “He respects his own ugly sort!” answered Mrs. Halliwell, with a laugh. + </p> + <p> + For a while it was plain to Clare that the master kept an eye on his + brother, and on himself and the puma. On one occasion he told the + assembled staff that he would have no tyranny: every one knew there was + among them but one tyrant. Gunn saw that his brother was awake and + watching: it was a check on his conduct, but he hated Clare the worse. For + the puma, he was afraid of him now, and went no more into his cage. + </p> + <p> + With the rest of the men Clare was a favourite, for they knew him true and + helpful, and constantly the same: they could always depend on him! Abdiel + shared in the favour shown his master. They said the dog was no beauty, + and had not a hair of breeding, but he was almost a human creature, if he + wasn't too good for one, and it was a shame to kick him. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0049" id="link2HCH0049"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter XLIX. Glum Gunn's revenge. + </h2> + <p> + They had opened the menagerie in a certain large town. It was the + evening-exhibition, and Clare was going his round with his wand of office, + pointing to the different animals, and telling of them what he thought + would most interest his hearers, when another attendant, the most friendly + of all, came behind him, and whispered that Glum Gunn had got hold of + Abby, and must be going to do the dog a mischief. Clare instantly gave him + his wand, and bolted through the crowd, reproaching himself that, because + Abby seemed restless, he had shut him up: if he had not been shut up, Gunn + would not have got hold of him! + </p> + <p> + When he reached the top of the steps, there was Gunn on the platform, + addressing the crowd. It was plain to the boy, by this time not + inexperienced, that he had been drinking, and, though not drunk, had taken + enough to rouse the worst in him. He had the poor dog by the scruff of the + neck, and was holding him out at arm's-length. Abdiel was the very picture + of wretchedness. Except in colour and size, he was more like a flea than + like any sort of dog—with his hind legs drawn up, his tail tucked in + tight between them, and his back-bone curved into a half circle. In this + uncomfortable plight, the tyrant was making a burlesque speech about him. + </p> + <p> + “Here you see, ladies and gentlemen,” he said, resuming a little, for a + few fresh spectators were in the act of joining the border of the crowd, + “as I have already had the honour of informing you, one of the most + extraordinary productions of the vegetable kingdom. It is not unnatural + that you should be, as I see you are, inclined to dispute the assertion. I + am, indeed, far from being surprised at your scepticism; the very + strangeness of the phenomenon consists in his being to all appearance + neither more nor less than a dog. But when I have the honour of leaving + you to your astonishment, I shall have convinced you that he is in reality + nothing but a vegetable. I would plainly call him what he is—a + cucumber, did I not fear the statement would demand of you more than your + powers of credence, evidently limited, could well afford. But when I have, + before your eyes, cut the throat of this vegetable, so extremely like an + ugly mongrel, and when those eyes see no single drop of blood follow the + knife, then you will be satisfied of the truth of my assertion; and, + having gazed on such a specimen of Nature's jugglery, will, I hope, do me + the honour to walk up and behold yet greater wonders within.” + </p> + <p> + He ceased, and set about getting his knife from his pocket. + </p> + <p> + Clare, watching Gunn's every motion, had partially sheltered himself + behind the side of the doorway. One who did not know Gunn, might well have + taken the thing for a practical joke, as innocent as it was foolish, the + pretended conclusion of which would be met by some comical frustration, + probably the dog's escape; but Clare saw that his friend was in mortal + peril. With the eye of one used to wild animals and the unexpectedness of + their sudden motions, he stood following every movement of Gunn's hands, + ready to anticipate whatever action might indicate its own approach: he + watched like the razor-clawed lynx. While Gunn held Abdiel as he did, he + could not seriously injure him; and although he was hurting him + dreadfully, his hate-possessed fingers, like a live, writhing vice, + worrying and squeezing the skin of his poor little neck, it yet was better + to wait the right moment. + </p> + <p> + When he saw the arm that held the dog drawn in, and the other hand move to + the man's pocket, he knew that in a moment more, with a theatrical cry of + dismay from the murderer, the body of his friend would be dashed on the + ground, his head half off, and the blood streaming from his neck. They + were mostly a rather vulgar people that stood about the platform, not a + few of them capable of being delighted with such an end to a joke poor + without some catastrophe. + </p> + <p> + The wretch had stooped a little, and slightly relaxed his hold on the dog + to open his knife, when with a bound that doubled the force of the blow + Clare struck him on the side of the head. He had no choice where to hit + him, and his fist fell on the spot so lately torn by the claws of Pummy. + The tyrant fell, and lay for a moment stunned. Abdiel flung himself on his + master, exultant at finding the thing after all the joke he had been + trying in vain to believe it. Clare caught him up and dashed down the + steps, one instant before Glum Gunn rose, cursing furiously. Clare charged + the crowd: it was not a time to be civil! Abdiel's life was in imminent + danger! That his own was in the same predicament did not occur to him. + </p> + <p> + His sudden rush took the crowd by surprise, or those next the caravans + would, I fear, have stopped him. Some started to follow him, but the + portion of the crowd he came to next, had more in it of a better sort, and + closed up behind him. There all the women and most of the men took the + part of the boy that loved his dog. + </p> + <p> + “What be you a-shovin' at?” bawled a huge country-man, against whom Gunn + made a cannon as he rushed in pursuit. “Aw'll knock 'ee flat—aw + wull! Let little un an's dawg aloan! Aw be for un! Hit me an'ye choose—aw + doan't objec'!” + </p> + <p> + Every attempt Gunn made to pass him, the man pushed his great body in his + way, and he soon saw there was no chance of overtaking Clara The wings of + Hate are swift, but not so swift as those of rescuing Love; and Help is + far readier to run to Love than to Hate. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0050" id="link2HCH0050"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter L. Clare seeks help. + </h2> + <p> + Clare got out of the crowd, and was soon beyond sight of anyone that knew + what had taken place, his heart exulting that he had saved his friend who + trusted in him. He hurried on, heedless whither, his only thought to get + away from the man that would murder Abby; and the town was a long way + behind ere the question of what they were to do for supper and shelter + presented itself. This had grown a strange thought, so long had the + caravan been to him a house of warmth and plenty. But comfort has its + disadvantages; and Clare discovered, with some dismay, that he was not + quite so free as ere the luxurious life of the last few weeks began: both + Abby and he would be less able, he feared, to bear hunger and cold. It was + but to start afresh, however, and grow abler! One consolation was, that, + if they felt hunger more, it could not do them so much harm: they had more + capital to go upon. He must not gather cowardice instead of courage from a + season of prosperity! He was glad for Abdiel, though, that he grew his own + clothes: he had left his warmest behind him. + </p> + <p> + It made him ashamed to find himself regretting his clothes when he had + lost a mother! Then it pleased him to think that she had his sovereign, + and the wages due since his clothes were paid for. They would help to give + Glum Gunn his own, and set the beasts free from him! Then he would go back + and spend his life with his mother and Pummy! Poor Pummy! But though Gunn + hated him, he was now afraid of him too; and his fear would be the + creature's protection! He had imagined it his might that cowed the puma, + when it was the animal's human gentleness that made him submissive to man: + he knew better now! Clare clasped Abdiel to his bosom, and trudged on. + They had gone miles ere it occurred to him that it might be more + comfortable for both if each carried his individual burden. He set Abdiel + down, and the dog ran vibrating with pleasure. Clare felt himself set down, + but with no tail to wag. + </p> + <p> + It was late in the autumn: they could do without supper, but they must if + possible find shelter! A farm-house came in sight. It recalled so vividly + Clare's early experiences of houselessness, that beasts and caravans, his + mother and Glum Gunn, grew hazy and distant, and the old time drew so near + that he seemed to have waked into it out of a long dream. They were back + in the old misery—a misery in which, however, his heart had not been + pierced as now with the pangs of innocent creatures unable or unwilling to + defend themselves from their natural guardian! It was long before he + learned that for weeks Gunn was unable to hurt one of them; that his + drinking, his late wound, and the blow Clare had given him, brought on him + a severe attack of erysipelas. + </p> + <p> + When they reached the farm-yard, Clare knew by the aspect of things that + the cattle were housed and the horses suppered. He crept unseen into one + of the cow-houses: the bodies and breath of the animals would keep them + warm! How sweet the smell seemed to him after that of the caravans! An + empty stall was before him, like a chamber prepared for his need. He + gathered a few straws from under each of the cows, taking care that not + one of them should be the less comfortable, and spread with them for Abby + and himself a thin couch. + </p> + <p> + But with the excitement of what had happened, his wonder as to what would + come next, and the hunger that had begun to gnaw at him, Clare could not + sleep. And as he lay awake, thoughts came to him. + </p> + <p> + Whence do the thoughts come to us? Of one thing I am sure—that I do + not make or even send for my own thoughts. If some greater one did not + think about us, we should not think about anything. Then what a wonder is + the night! How it works compelling people to think! Surely somehow God + comes nearer in the night! Clare began to think how helpless he was. He + was not thinking of food and warmth, but of doing things for the beings he + loved. It seemed to him hard that he could but love, and nothing more. + There was his mother! he could do nothing to deliver her from that + villainous brother-in-law! There was Pummy, exposed to the cruelty of the + same evil man! and again he could do nothing for him! There was Maly! he + could do nothing for her—nothing to make her father and mother glad + for her up in the dome of the angels! + </p> + <p> + Was it possible that he really could do nothing? + </p> + <p> + Then came the thought that people used to say prayers in the days when he + went with his mother to church. He had been taught to say prayers himself, + but had begun to forget them when there was no bed to kneel beside. What + did saying prayers mean? In the Bible-stories people prayed when they were + in trouble and could not help themselves! Did it matter that he had no + church and no bedside? Surely one place must be as good as another, if it + was true that God was everywhere! Surely he could hear him wherever he + spoke! Neither could there be any necessity for speaking loud! God would + hear, however low he spoke! Then he remembered that God knew the thoughts + of his creatures: if so, he might think a prayer to him; there was no need + for any words! + </p> + <p> + From the moment of that conclusion, Clare began to pray to God. And now he + prayed the right kind of prayer; that is, his prayers were real prayers; + he asked for what he wanted. To say prayers asking God for things we do + not care about, is to mock him. When we ask for something we want, it may + be a thing God does not care to give us; but he likes us to speak to him + about it. If it is good for us, he will give it us; if it is not good, he + will not give it to us, for it would hurt us. But Clare only asked God to + do what he is always doing: his prayer was that God would be good to all + his mothers, and to his two fathers, and Mr. Halliwell, and Maly, and + Sarah, and his own baby, and Tommy—and poor Pummy, and would, if + Glum Gunn beat him, help him to bear the blows, and not mind them very + much. He ended with something like this: + </p> + <p> + “God, I can't do anything for anybody! I wish I could! You can get near + them, God: please do something good to every one of them because I can't. + I think I could go to sleep now, if I were sure you had listened!” + </p> + <p> + Having thus cast all his cares on God, he did go to sleep; and woke in the + morning ready for the new day that arrived with his waking. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0051" id="link2HCH0051"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LI. Clare a true master. + </h2> + <p> + It would take a big book to tell all the things of interest that happened + to Clare in the next few weeks. They would be mainly how and where he + found refuge, and how he and Abdiel got things to eat. Verily they did not + live on the fat of the land. Now and then some benevolent person, seeing + him in such evident want, would contrive a job in order to pay him for it: + in one place, although they had no need of him, certain good people gave + him ten days' work under a gardener, and dismissed him with twenty + shillings in his pocket. + </p> + <p> + One way and another, Clare and Abdiel did not die of hunger or of cold. + That is the summary of their history for a good many weeks. + </p> + <p> + One night they slept on a common, in the lee of a gypsy tent, and + contrived to get away in the morning without being seen. For Clare feared + they might offer him something stolen, and hunger might persuade him to + ask no questions. Many respectable people will laugh at the idea of a boy + being so particular. Such are immeasurably more to be pitied than Clare. + No one could be hard on a boy who in such circumstances took what was + offered him, but he would not be so honest as Clare—though he might + well be more honest than such as would laugh at him. + </p> + <p> + Another time he went up to a large house, to see if he might not there get + a job. He found the place, for the time at least, abandoned: I suppose the + persons in charge had deserted their post to make holiday. He lingered + about until the evening fell, and then got with Abdiel under a glass frame + in the kitchen-garden. But the glass was so close to them that Clare + feared breaking it; so they got out again, and lay down on a bench in a + shed for potting plants. + </p> + <p> + Clare was waked in the morning by a sound cuff on the side of the head. He + got off the bench, took up Abdiel, and coming to himself, said to the + gardener who stood before him in righteous indignation, + </p> + <p> + “I'm much obliged to you for my bedroom, sir. It was very cold last + night.” + </p> + <p> + His words and respectful manner mollified the gardener a little. + </p> + <p> + “You have no business here!” he returned. + </p> + <p> + “I know that, sir; but what is a boy to do?” answered Clare. “I wasn't + hurting anything, and it was so cold we might have died if we had slept + out of doors.” + </p> + <p> + “That's no business of mine!” + </p> + <p> + “But it is of mine,” rejoined Clare; “—except you think a boy that + can't get work ought to commit suicide. If he mustn't do that, he can't + always help doing what people with houses don't like!” + </p> + <p> + The gardener was not a bad sort of fellow, and perceived the truth in what + the boy said. + </p> + <p> + “That's always the story!” he replied, however. “Can't get work! No idle + boy ever could get work! I know the sort of you—well!” + </p> + <p> + “Would you mind giving me a chance?” returned Clare eagerly. “I wouldn't + ask much wages.” + </p> + <p> + “You wouldn't, if you asked what you was worth!” + </p> + <p> + “We'd be worth our victuals anyhow!” answered Clare, who always counted + the dog. + </p> + <p> + “Who's we?” asked the man. “Be there a hundred of you?” + </p> + <p> + “No; only two. Only me and Abdiel here!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, that beast of a mongrel?” + </p> + <p> + The gardener made a stride as if to seize the dog. Clare bounded from him. + The man burst into a mocking laugh. + </p> + <p> + “He's a good dog, indeed, sir!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “You'll give him the sack before I give you a job.” + </p> + <p> + “We're old friends, sir; we can't be parted!” + </p> + <p> + “I thought as much!” cried the gardener. “They're always ready to work, + an' so hungry! But will they part with the mangy dog? Not they! Hard work + and good wages ain't nowhere beside a mongrel pup! Get out! Don't I know + the whole ugly bilin' of ye!” + </p> + <p> + Clare turned away with a gentle good-morning, which the man did not get + out of his heart for a matter of two days, and departed, hugging Abdiel. + </p> + <p> + He was often cold and always hungry, but his life was anything but dull. + The man who does not know where his next meal is to come from, is seldom + afflicted with ennui. That is the monopoly of the enviable with nothing to + do, and everything money can get them. A foolish west-end life has + immeasurably more discomfort in it than that of a street Arab. The + ordinary beggar, while in tolerable health, finds far more enjoyment than + most fashionable ladies. + </p> + <p> + Thus Clare went wandering long, seeking work, and finding next to none—all + the time upheld by the feeling that something was waiting for him + somewhere, that he was every day drawing nearer to it. Not once yet had he + lost heart. In very virtue of unselfishness and lack of resentment, he was + strong. Not once had he shed a tear for himself, not once had he pitied + his own condition. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0052" id="link2HCH0052"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LII. Miss Tempest. + </h2> + <p> + Without knowing it, he was approaching the sea. Walking along a chain of + downs, he saw suddenly from the top of one of them, for the first time in + his memory though not in his life, the sea—a pale blue cloud, as it + appeared, far on the horizon, between two low hills. The sight of it, + although he did not at first know what it was, brought with it a strange + inexplicable feeling of dolorous pleasure. For this he could not account. + It was the faintest revival of an all but obliterated impression of + something familiar to his childhood, lying somewhere deeper than the + memory, which was a blank in regard to it. But that feeling was not all + that the sight awoke in him. The pale blue cloud bore to him such a look + of the eternal, that it seemed the very place for God to live in—the + solemn, stirless region of calm in which the being to whom now of late he + had first begun in reality to pray, kept his abode. The hungry, worn, + tattered boy, with nothing to call his own but a great hope and a little + dog, fell down on his bare knees on the hard road, and stretched out his + hands in an ecstasy toward the low cloud. + </p> + <p> + The far-off ringing tramp of a horse's feet aroused him. He rose light as + an athlete, the great hope grown twice its former size, and hunger + forgotten. + </p> + <p> + The blue cloud kept in sight, and by and by he knew it was the sea he saw, + though how or at what moment the knowledge came to him he could not have + told. The track was leading him toward one of the principal southern + ports. + </p> + <p> + By this time he was again very thin; but he had brown cheeks and clear + eyes, and, save when suffering immediately from hunger, felt perfectly + well. Hunger is a sad thing notwithstanding its deep wholesomeness; but + there is immeasurably more suffering in the world from eating too much + than from eating too little. + </p> + <p> + Well able by this time to read the signs of the road, he perceived at + length he must be drawing near a town. He had already passed a house or + two with a little lawn in front, and indications of a garden behind; and + he hoped yet again that here, after all, he might get work. To door after + door he carried his modest request: some doors were shut in his face + almost before he could speak; at others he had a civil word from maid, or + a rough word from man; from none came sound of assent. It had become + harder too to find shelter. Ever as he went, space was more and more + appropriated and enclosed; less and less room was left for the man for + whom had been made no special cubic provision of earth and air, and who + had no money—the most disreputable of conditions in the eyes of such + as would be helpless if they had none. A rare philosopher for eyes capable + of understanding him, he was a despicable being in the eyes of the common + man. To know a human being one must be human—that is, the divine + must be strong in him. + </p> + <p> + For some days now, neither Clare nor Abdiel had come even within sight of + food enough to make a meal. The dog was rather thinner than his master. + </p> + <p> + “Abdiel,” said Clare to him one day, “I fear you will soon be a serpent! + Your body gets longer and longer, and your legs get shorter and shorter: + you'll be crawling presently, rubbing the hair off your useless little + belly on the dusty road! Never mind, Abdiel; you'll be a good serpent. + Satan was turned into a bad serpent because he was a bad angel; you will + be a good serpent, because you are a good dog! I hope, however, we shall + yet put a stop to the serpent-business!” + </p> + <p> + Abdiel wagged his tail, as much as to say, “All right, master!” + </p> + <p> + The nights were now very cold; winter was coming fast. Had Clare been long + enough in one place for people to know him, he would never have been + allowed to go so cold and hungry; but he had always to move on, and nobody + had time to learn to care about him. So the terrible sunless season + threatened to wrap him in its winding-sheet, and lay him down. + </p> + <p> + One evening, just before sunset, grown sleepy in spite of the gathering + cold, he sat down on one of the two steep grassy slopes that bordered the + road. His feet were bare now, bare and brown, for his shoes had come to + such plight that it was a relief to throw them away; but his soles had + grown like leather. They rested in the dry shallow rain-channel, and his + body leaned back against the slope. Abdiel, instead of jumping on the bank + and lying in the soft grass, lay down on the leathery feet, and covered + them from the night with his long faithful body and its coat of tangled + hair. + </p> + <p> + The sun was shooting his last radiance along the road, and its redness + caressed the sleeping companions, when an elderly lady came to her gate at + the top of the opposite slope, and looked along the road with the sun. Her + reverting glance fell upon the sleepers—the Knight of Hope lying in + rags, not marble, his feet not upon his dog, but his dog upon his feet. It + was a touching picture, and the old lady's heart was one easily touched. + She looked and saw that the face of the boy, whose hunger was as plain as + his rags, was calm as the wintry sky. She wondered, but she needed not + have wondered; for storm of anger, drought of greed, nor rotting mist of + selfishness, had passed or rested there, to billow, or score, or waste. + </p> + <p> + Her mere glance seemed to wake Abdiel, who took advantage of his waking to + have a lick at the brown, dusty, brave, uncomplaining feet, so well used + to the world's <i>via dolorosa</i>. She saw, and was touched yet more by + this ministration of the guardian of the feet. Gently opening the gate she + descended the slope, crossed the road, and stood silent, regarding the + outcasts. No cloudy blanket covered the sky: ere morning the dew would lie + frozen on the grass! + </p> + <p> + “You shouldn't be sleeping there!” she said. + </p> + <p> + Abdiel started to his four feet and would have snarled, but with one look + at the lady changed his mind. Clare half awoke, half sat up, made an + inarticulate murmur, and fell back again. + </p> + <p> + “Get up, my boy,” said the old lady. “You must indeed!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, please, ma'am, must I?” answered Clare, slowly rising to his feet. “I + had but just lain down, and I'm so tired!—If I mayn't sleep <i>there</i>,” + he continued, “where <i>am</i> I to sleep?—Please, ma'am, why is + everybody so set against letting a boy sleep? It don't cost them anything! + I can understand not giving him work, if he looks too much in want of it; + but why should they count it bad of him to lie down and sleep?” + </p> + <p> + The lady wisely let him talk; not until he stopped did she answer him. + </p> + <p> + “It's because of the frost, my boy!” she said. “It would be the death of + you to sleep out of doors to-night!” + </p> + <p> + “It's a nice place for it, ma'am!” + </p> + <p> + “To sleep in? Certainly not!” + </p> + <p> + “I didn't mean that, ma'am. I meant a nice place to go away from—to + die in, ma'am!” + </p> + <p> + “That is not ours to choose,” answered the old lady severely, but the tone + of her severity trembled. + </p> + <p> + “I sha'n't find anywhere so nice as this bank,” said Clare, turning and + looking at it sorrowfully. + </p> + <p> + “There are plenty of places in the town. It's but a mile farther on!” + </p> + <p> + “But this is so much nicer, ma'am! And I've no money—none at all, + ma'am. When I came out of prison,—” + </p> + <p> + “Came out of <i>where</i>?” + </p> + <p> + “Out of prison, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + He had never been in prison in a legal sense, never having been convicted + of anything; but he did not know the difference between detention and + imprisonment. + </p> + <p> + “Prison!” she exclaimed, holding up her hands in horror. “How dare you + mention prison!” + </p> + <p> + “Because I was in it, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + “And to say it so coolly too! Are you not ashamed of yourself?” + </p> + <p> + “No, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + “It's a shame to have been in prison.” + </p> + <p> + “Not if I didn't do anything wrong.” + </p> + <p> + “Nobody will believe that, I'm afraid!” + </p> + <p> + “I suppose not, ma'am! I used to feel very angry when people wouldn't + believe me, but now I see they are not to blame. And now I've got used to + it, and it don't hurt so much.—But,” he added with a sigh, “the + worst of it is, they won't give me any work!” + </p> + <p> + “Do you always tell people you've come out of prison?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, ma'am, when I think of it.” + </p> + <p> + “Then you can't wonder they won't give you work!” + </p> + <p> + “I don't, ma'am—not now. It seems a law of the universe!” + </p> + <p> + “Not of the universe, I think—but of this world—perhaps!” said + the old lady thoughtfully. + </p> + <p> + “But there's one thing I do wonder at,” said Clare. “When I say I've been + in prison, they believe me; but when I say I haven't done anything wrong, + then they mock me, and seem quite amused at being expected to believe + that. I can't get at it!” + </p> + <p> + “I daresay! But people will always believe you against yourself.—What + are you going to do, then, if nobody will give you work? You can't + starve!” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed I <i>can</i>, ma'am! It's just the one thing I've got to do. We've + been pretty near the last of it sometimes—me and Abdiel! Haven't we, + Abby?” + </p> + <p> + The dog wagged his tail, and the old lady turned aside to control her + feelings. + </p> + <p> + “Don't cry, ma'am,” said Clare; “I don't mind it—not <i>much</i>. + I'm too glad I didn't <i>do</i> anything, to mind it much! Why should I! + Ought I to mind it much, ma'am? Jesus Christ hadn't done anything, and + they killed <i>him</i>! I don't fancy it's so very bad to die of only + hunger! But we'll soon see!—Sha'n't we, Abby?” + </p> + <p> + Again the dog wagged his tail. + </p> + <p> + “If you didn't do anything wrong, what <i>did</i> you do?” said the old + lady, almost at her wits' end. + </p> + <p> + “I don't like telling things that are not going to be believed. It's like + washing your face with ink!” + </p> + <p> + “I will <i>try</i> to believe you.” + </p> + <p> + “Then I will tell you; for you speak the truth, ma'am, and so, perhaps, + will be able to believe the truth!” + </p> + <p> + “How do you know I speak the truth?” + </p> + <p> + “Because you didn't say, 'I will believe you.' Nobody can be sure of doing + that. But you can be sure of <i>trying</i>; and you said, 'I will <i>try</i> + to believe you.'” + </p> + <p> + “Tell me all about it then.” + </p> + <p> + “I will, ma'am.—The policeman came in the middle of the night when + we were asleep, and took us all away, because we were in a house that was + not ours.” + </p> + <p> + “Whose was it then?” + </p> + <p> + “Nobody knew. It was what they call in chancery. There was nobody in it + but moths and flies and spiders and rats;—though I think the rats + only came to eat baby.” + </p> + <p> + “Baby! Then the whole family of you, father, mother, and all, were taken + to prison!” + </p> + <p> + “No, ma'am; my fathers and my mothers were taken up into the dome of the + angels.”—What with hunger and sleepiness, Clare was talking like a + child.—“I haven't any father and mother in this world. I have two + fathers and two mothers up there, and one mother in this world. She's the + mother of the wild beasts.” + </p> + <p> + The old lady began to doubt the boy's sanity, but she went on questioning + him. + </p> + <p> + “How did you have a baby with you, then?” + </p> + <p> + “The baby was my own, ma'am. I took her out of the water-butt.” + </p> + <p> + Once more Clare had to tell his story—from the time, that is, when + his adoptive father and mother died. He told it in such a simple + matter-of-fact way, yet with such quaint remarks, from their very + simplicity difficult to understand, that, if the old lady, for all her + trying, was not able quite to believe his tale, it was because she doubted + whether the boy was not one of God's innocents, with an angel-haunted + brain. + </p> + <p> + “And what's become of Tommy?” she asked. + </p> + <p> + “He's in the same workhouse with baby. I'm very glad; for what I should + have done with Tommy, and nothing to give him to eat, I can't think. He + would have been sure to steal! I couldn't have kept him from it!” + </p> + <p> + “You must be more careful of your company.” + </p> + <p> + “Please, ma'am, I was very careful of Tommy. He had the best company I + could give him: I did try to be better for Tommy's sake. But my trying + wasn't much use to Tommy, so long as he wouldn't try! He was a little + better, though, I think; and if I had him now, and could give him plenty + to eat, and had baby as well as Abdiel to help me, we might make something + of Tommy, I think.—<i>You</i> think so—don't you, Abdiel?” + </p> + <p> + The dog, who had stood looking in his master's face all the time he spoke, + wagged his tail faster. + </p> + <p> + “What a name to give a dog! Where did you find it?” + </p> + <p> + “In Paradise Lost, ma'am. Abdiel was the one angel, you remember, ma'am, + who, when he saw what Satan was up to, left him, and went back to his + duty.” + </p> + <p> + “And what was his duty?” + </p> + <p> + “Why of course to do what God told him. I love Abdiel, and because I love + the little dog and he took care of baby, I call him Abdiel too. Heaven is + so far off that it makes no confusion to have the same name.” + </p> + <p> + “But how dare you give the name of an angel to a dog?” + </p> + <p> + “To a <i>good</i> dog, ma'am! A good dog is good enough to go with any + angel—at his heels of course! If he had been a bad dog, it would + have been wicked to name him after a good angel. If the dog had been Tommy—I + mean if Tommy had been the dog, I should have had to call him Moloch, or + Belzebub! God made the angels and the dogs; and if the dogs are good, God + loves them.—Don't he, Abdiel?” + </p> + <p> + Abdiel assented after his usual fashion. The lady said nothing. Clare went + on. + </p> + <p> + “Abdiel won't mind—the angel Abdiel, I mean, ma'am—he won't + mind lending his name to my friend. The dog will have a name of his own, + perhaps, some day—like the rest of us!” + </p> + <p> + “What is <i>your</i> name?” + </p> + <p> + “The name I have now is, like the dog's, a borrowed one. I shall get my + own one day—not here—but there—when—when—I'm + hungry enough to go and find it.” + </p> + <p> + Clare had grown very white. He sat down, and lay back on the grass. He had + talked more in those few minutes than for weeks, and want had made him + weak. He felt very faint. The dog jumped up, and fell to licking his face. + </p> + <p> + “What a wicked old woman I am!” said the lady to herself, and ran across + the road like some little long-legged bird, and climbed the bank swiftly. + </p> + <p> + She disappeared within the gate, but to return presently with a tumbler of + milk and a huge piece of bread. + </p> + <p> + “Here, boy!” she cried; “here is medicine for you! Make haste and take + it.” + </p> + <p> + Clare sat up feebly, and stared at the tumbler for a moment. Either he + could hardly believe his eyes, or was too sick to take it at once. When he + had it in his hand, he held it out to the dog. + </p> + <p> + “Here, Abdiel, have a little,” he said. + </p> + <p> + This offended the old lady. + </p> + <p> + “You're never going to give the dog that good milk!” she cried. + </p> + <p> + “A little of it, please, ma'am!” + </p> + <p> + “—And feed him out of the tumbler too?” + </p> + <p> + “He's had nothing to-day, ma'am, and we're comrades!” + </p> + <p> + “But it's not clean of you!” + </p> + <p> + “Ah, you don't know dogs, ma'am! His tongue is clean as clean as + anybody's.” + </p> + <p> + Abdiel took three or four little laps of the milk, drew away, and looked + up at his master—as much as to say, “You, now!” + </p> + <p> + “Besides,” Clare went on, “he couldn't get at it so well in the bottom of + the tumbler.” + </p> + <p> + With that he raised it to his own lips, drank eagerly, and set it on the + road half empty, looking his thanks to the giver with a smile she thought + heavenly. Then he broke the bread, and giving the dog nearly the half of + it, began to eat the rest himself. The old lady stood looking on in + silence, pondering what she was to do with the celestial beggar. + </p> + <p> + “Would you mind sleeping in the greenhouse, if I had a bed put up for + you?” she said at length, in tone apologetic. + </p> + <p> + “This is a better place—though I wish it was warmer!” said Clare, + with another smile as he looked up at the sky, in which a few stars were + beginning to twinkle, and thought of the gardeners he had met. “—Don't + you think it better, ma'am?” + </p> + <p> + “No, indeed, I don't!” she answered crossly; for to her the open air at + night seemed wrong, disreputable. There was something unholy in it! + </p> + <p> + “I would rather stay here,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Why?” + </p> + <p> + “Because you don't quite believe me, ma'am. You can't; and you can't help + it. You wouldn't be able to sleep for thinking that a boy just out of + prison was lying in the greenhouse. There would be no saying what he might + not do! I once read in a newspaper how an old lady took a lad into her + house for a servant, and he murdered her!—No, ma'am, thank you! + After such a supper we shall sleep beautifully!—Sha'n't we, Abby? + And then, perhaps, you could give me a job in the garden to-morrow! I + daresay the gardener wants a little help sometimes! But if he knew me to + have slept in the greenhouse, he would hate me.” + </p> + <p> + The old lady said nothing, for, like most old ladies, she feared her + gardener. She took the tumbler from the boy's hand, and went into the + house. But in two minutes she came again, with another great piece of + bread for Clare, and a bone with something on it which she threw to + Abdiel. The dog's ears started up, erect and alive, like individual + creatures, and his eyes gleamed; but he looked at his master, and would + not touch the bone without his leave—which given, he fell upon it, + and worried it as if it had been a rat. + </p> + <p> + Clare was now himself again, and when the old lady left them for the third + time, he walked with her across the way, bread in hand, to open the gate + for her. When she was inside, he took off his cap, and bade her good-night + with a grace that won all that was left to be won of her heart. + </p> + <p> + Before she had taken three steps from the gate, the old lady turned. + </p> + <p> + “Boy!” she called; and Clare, who was making for his couch under the + stars, hastened back at the sound of her voice. + </p> + <p> + “I shall not be able to sleep,” she said, “for thinking of you out there + in the bleak night!” + </p> + <p> + “I am used to it, ma'am!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, I daresay! but you see I'm not! and I don't like the thought of it! + You may like hoarfrost-sheets, for what I know, but I don't! You may like + the stars for a tester—because you want to die and go to them, I + suppose!—but I have no fancy for the stars! You are a foolish + fellow, and I am out of temper with you. You don't give a thought to me—or + to my feelings if you should die! I should never go to bed again with a + good conscience!—Besides, I should have to nurse you!” + </p> + <p> + The last member of her expostulation was hardly in logical sequence, but + it had not the less influence on Clare for that. + </p> + <p> + “I will do whatever you please, ma'am,” he answered humbly. “—Come, + Abdiel!” + </p> + <p> + The dog came running across the road with his bone in his mouth. + </p> + <p> + “You mustn't bring that inside the gate, Ab!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + The dog dropped it. + </p> + <p> + “Good dog! It's a lady's garden, you know, Abdiel!” Then turning to his + hostess, Clare added, “I always tell him when I'm pleased with him: don't + you think it right, ma'am?” + </p> + <p> + “I daresay! I don't know anything about dogs.” + </p> + <p> + “If you had a dog like Abdiel, he would soon teach you dogs, ma'am!” + rejoined Clare. + </p> + <p> + By this time they were at the house-door. The lady told him to wait there, + went in, and had a talk with her two maids. In half an hour, Clare and his + four-footed angel were asleep—in an outhouse, it is true, but in a + comfortable bed, such as they had not seen since their flight from the + caravans. The cold breeze wandered moaning like a lost thing round the + bare walls, as if every time it woke, it went abroad to see if there was + any hope for the world; but it did not touch them; and if through their + ears it got into their dreams, it made their sleep the sweeter, and their + sense of refuge the deeper. + </p> + <p> + But although the bewitching boy and his good dog were not lying in the + open air over against her gate, and although never a thought of murder or + theft came to trouble her, it was long before the old lady found repose. + Her heart had been deeply touched. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0053" id="link2HCH0053"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LIII. The gardener. + </h2> + <p> + From the fact that his hostess made him no answer when he breathed the + hope of a job in her garden, Clare concluded that he had presumed in + suggesting the thing to her, and that she would be relieved by their + departure. When he woke in the morning, therefore, early after a grand + sleep, he felt he had no right to linger: he had been invited to sleep, + and he had slept! He also shrank from the idea of being supposed to expect + his breakfast before he went. So, as soon as he got up, he walked out of + the gate, crossed the road, and sat down on the spot he had occupied the + night before, there to wait until the house should be astir. For, although + he could not linger within gates where he was unknown, neither could he + slink away without morning-thanks for the gift of a warm night. + </p> + <p> + As he sat, he grew drowsy, and leaning back, fell fast asleep. + </p> + <p> + The thoughts of his hostess had been running on very different lines, and + she woke with feelings concerning the pauper very different from those the + pauper imagined in her. She must do something for him; she must give or + get him work! As to giving him work, her difficulty lay in the gardener. + She resolved, however, to attempt over-coming it. + </p> + <p> + She rose earlier than usual, therefore, and as the man, who did not sleep + in the house, was not yet come, she went down to the gate to meet him and + have the thing over—so eager was she, and so nervous in prospect of + such an interview with her dreaded servant. + </p> + <p> + “Good gracious!” she murmured aloud, “does it rain beggars?” For there, on + the same spot, lay another beggar, another boy, with a dog in his bosom + the facsimile of the ugly white thing named after Milton's angel! She did + not feel moved to go and make his acquaintance. It could not be another of + the family, could it? that had already heard of his brother's good luck, + and come to see whether there might not be a picking for him too! She + turned away hurriedly lest he should wake, and went back to the house. + </p> + <p> + But looking behind her as she mounted the steps, she caught sight of the + gardener at the other gate, casting a displeased look across the road + before he entered: he did not like to see tramps about! Her heart sank a + little, but she was not to be turned aside. + </p> + <p> + The gardener came in, and his mistress joined him and walked with him to + his work, telling him as much as she thought fit concerning the boy, and + interspersing her narrative with hints of the duty of giving every one a + chance. She took care not to mention that he had come out of a prison + somewhere. + </p> + <p> + “No one should be driven to despair,” she said, little thinking she used + almost the very words of the Lord, according to the Sinaitic reading of a + passage in St. Luke's gospel. + </p> + <p> + The argument had little force with the rough Scotchman: his mistress was + soft-hearted! He shook his head ominously at the idea of giving a tramp + the chance of doing decent work, but at last consented, with a show of + being over-persuaded to an imprudent action, to let the boy help him for a + day, and see how he got on, stipulating, however, that he should not be + supposed to have pledged himself to anything. + </p> + <p> + Miss Tempest's plans went beyond the gardener's scope. She had for some + months been inclined to have a boy to help in the house—an + inclination justified by a late unexpected accession of income: if this + boy were what he seemed, he would make a more than valuable servant; and + nothing could clear her judgment of him better, she thought, than putting + him to the test of a brief subjection to the cross-grained, exacting + Scotchman. By that she would soon know whether to dismiss him, or venture + with him farther! + </p> + <p> + She had but just wrung his hard consent from the gardener, when the cook + came running, to say the boy was gone. Upon poor Miss Tempest's heart fell + a cold avalanche. + </p> + <p> + “But we've counted the spoons, ma'am, and they're all right!” said the + cook. + </p> + <p> + This additional statement, however, did not seem to give much consolation + to the benevolent old lady. She stood for a moment with her eyes on the + ground, too pained to move or speak. Then she started, and ran to the + gate. The cook ran after, thinking her mistress gone out of her mind—and + was sure of it when she saw her open the gate, and run straight down the + bank to the road. But when she reached the gate herself, she saw her + standing over a boy asleep on the grass of the opposite bank. + </p> + <p> + Abdiel, lying on his bosom, watched her with keen friendly eyes. Clare was + dreaming some agreeable morning-dream; for a smile of such pleasure as + could haunt only an innocent face, nickered on it like a sunny ripple on + the still water of a pool. + </p> + <p> + “No!” said Miss Tempest to herself; “there's no duplicity there! + Otherwise, a tree is not known by its fruit!” + </p> + <p> + Clare opened his eyes, and started lightly to his feet, strong and + refreshed. + </p> + <p> + “Good morning, ma'am!” he said, pulling off his cap. + </p> + <p> + “Good morning—what am I to call you?” she returned. + </p> + <p> + “Clare, if you please, ma'am.” + </p> + <p> + “What is your Christian name?” + </p> + <p> + “That is my Christian name, ma'am—Clare.” + </p> + <p> + “Then what is your surname?” + </p> + <p> + “I am called Porson, ma'am, but I have another name. Mr. Porson adopted + me.” + </p> + <p> + “What is your other name?” + </p> + <p> + “I don't know, ma'am. I am going to know one day, I think; but the day is + not come yet.” + </p> + <p> + He told her all he could about his adoptive parents, and little Maly; but + the time before he went to the farm was growing strangely dreamlike, as if + it had sunk a long way down in the dark waters of the past—all up to + the hour when Maly was carried away by the long black aunt. + </p> + <p> + The story accounted to Miss Tempest both for his good speech and the name + of his dog. The adopted child of a clergyman might well be acquainted with + <i>Paradise Lost</i>, though she herself had never read more of it than + the apostrophe to Light in the beginning of the third book! That she had + learned at school without understanding phrase or sentence of it; while + Clare never left passage alone until he understood it, or, failing that, + had invented a meaning for it. + </p> + <p> + “Well, then, Clare, I've been talking to my gardener about you,” said Miss + Tempest. “He will give you a job.” + </p> + <p> + “God bless you, ma'am! I'm ready!” cried Clare, stretching out his arms, + as if to get them to the proper length for work. “Where shall I find him?” + </p> + <p> + “You must have breakfast first.” + </p> + <p> + She led the way to the kitchen. + </p> + <p> + The cook, a middle-aged woman, looked at the dog, and her face puckered + all over with points of interrogation and exclamation. + </p> + <p> + “Please, cook, will you give this young man some breakfast? He wanted to + go to work without any, but that wouldn't do—would it, cook?” said + her mistress. + </p> + <p> + “I hope the dog won't be running in and out of my kitchen all day, ma'am!” + </p> + <p> + “No fear of that, cook!” said Clare; “he never leaves me.” + </p> + <p> + “Then I don't think—I'm afraid,” she began, and stopped. “—But + that's none of my business,” she added. “John will look after his own—and + more!” + </p> + <p> + Miss Tempest said nothing, but she almost trembled; for John, she knew, + had a perfect hatred of dogs. Nor could anyone wonder, for, gate open or + gate shut, in they came and ran over his beds. She dared not interfere! He + and Clare must settle the question of Abdiel or no Abdiel between them! + She left the kitchen. + </p> + <p> + The cook threw the dog a crust of bread, and Abdiel, after a look at his + master, fell upon it with his white, hungry little teeth. Then she + proceeded to make a cup of coffee for Clare, casting an occasional glance + of pity at his garments, so miserably worn and rent, and his brown bare + feet. + </p> + <p> + “How on the face of this blessed world, boy, do you expect to work in the + garden without shoes?” she said at length. + </p> + <p> + “Most things I can do well enough without them,” answered Clare; “—even + digging, if the ground is not very hard. My feet used to be soft, but now + the soles of them are like leather.—They've grown their own shoes,” + he added, with a smile, and looked straight in her eyes. + </p> + <p> + The smile and the look went far to win her heart, as they had won that of + her mistress: she felt them true, and wondered how such a fair-spoken, + sweet-faced boy could be on the tramp. She poured him out a huge cup of + coffee, fried him a piece of bacon, and cut him as much bread and butter + as he could dispose of. He had not often eaten anything but dry bread, in + general very dry, since he left the menagerie, and now felt feasted like + an emperor. Pleased with the master, the cook fed the dog with equal + liberality; and then, curious to witness their reception by John, between + whom and herself was continuous feud, she conducted Clare to the gardener. + From a distance he saw them coming. With look irate fixed upon the dog, he + started to meet them. Clare knew too well the meaning of that look, and + saw in him Satan regarding Abdiel with eye of fire, and the words on his + lips— + </p> +<pre xml:space="preserve"> + “And fly, ere evil intercept thy flight.” + </pre> + <p> + The moment he came near enough, without word, or show of malice beyond + what lay in his eye, he made, with the sharp hoe he carried, a sudden + downstroke at the faithful angel, thinking to serve him as Gabriel served + Moloch. But Abdiel was too quick for him: he had read danger in his very + gait the moment he saw him move, and enmity in his eyes when he came + nearer. He kept therefore his own eyes on the hoe, and never moved until + the moment of attack. Then he darted aside. The weapon therefore came down + on the hard gravel, jarring the arm of his treacherous enemy. With a + muttered curse John followed him and made another attempt, which Abdiel in + like manner eluded. John followed and followed; Abdiel fled and fled—never + farther than a few yards, seeming almost to entice the man's pursuit, + sometimes pirouetting on his hind legs to escape the blows which the + gardener, growing more and more furious with failure, went on aiming at + him. Fruitlessly did Clare assure him that neither would the dog do any + harm, nor allow any one to hit him. It was from very weariness that at + last he desisted, and wiping his forehead with his shirt-sleeve, turned + upon Clare in the smothered wrath that knows itself ridiculous. For all + the time the cook stood by, shaking with delighted laughter at his every + fresh discomfiture. + </p> + <p> + “Awa', ye deil's buckie,” he cried, “an tak' the little Sawtan wi' ye! + Dinna lat me see yer face again.” + </p> + <p> + “But the lady told me you would give me a job!” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + “I didna tell her I wad gie yer tyke a job! I wad though, gien he wad lat + me!” + </p> + <p> + “He's given you a stiff one!” said the cook, and laughed again. + </p> + <p> + The gardener took no notice of her remark. + </p> + <p> + “Awa' wi' ye!” he cried again, yet more wrathfully, “—or—” + </p> + <p> + He raised his hand. + </p> + <p> + Clare looked in his eyes and did not budge. + </p> + <p> + “For shame, John!” expostulated the cook. “Would you strike a child?” + </p> + <p> + “I'm no child, cook!” said Clare. “He can't hurt me much. I've had a good + breakfast!” + </p> + <p> + “Lat 'im tak' awa' that deevil o' a tyke o' his, as I tauld him,” + thundered the gardener, “or I'll mak' a pulp o' 'im!” + </p> + <p> + “I've had such a breakfast, sir, as I'm bound to give a whole day's work + in return for,” said Clare, looking up at the angry man; “and I won't stir + till I've done it. Stolen food on my stomach would turn me sick!” + </p> + <p> + “Gien it did, it wadna be the first time, I reckon!” said the gardener. + </p> + <p> + “It <i>would</i> be the first time!” returned Clara “You are very rude.—If + Abdiel understood Scotch, he would bite you,” he added, as the dog, + hearing his master speak angrily, came up, ears erect, and took his place + at his side, ready for combat. + </p> + <p> + “Ye'll hae to tak' some ither mode o' payin' the debt!” said John. “Stick + spaud in yird here, ye sall not! You or I maun flit first!” + </p> + <p> + With that he walked slowly away, shouldering his hoe. + </p> + <p> + “Come, Abdiel,” said Clare; “we must go and tell Miss Tempest! Perhaps + she'll find something else for us to do. If she can't, she'll forgive us + our breakfast, and we'll be off on the tramp again. I thought we were + going to have a day's rest—I mean work; that's the rest we want! But + this man is an enemy to the poor.” + </p> + <p> + The gardener half turned, as if he would speak, but changed his mind and + went his way. + </p> + <p> + “Never mind John!” said the cook, loud enough for John to hear. “He's an + old curmudgeon as can't sleep o' nights for quarrellin' inside him. I'll + go to mis'ess, and you go and sit down in the kitchen till I come to you.” + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0054" id="link2HCH0054"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LIV. The Kitchen. + </h2> + <p> + Clare went into the kitchen, and sat down. The housemaid came in, and + stood for a moment looking at him. Then she asked him what he wanted + there. + </p> + <p> + “Cook told me to wait here,” he answered. + </p> + <p> + “Wait for what?” + </p> + <p> + “Till she came to me. She's gone to speak to Miss Tempest.” + </p> + <p> + “I won't have that dog here.” + </p> + <p> + “When I had a home,” remarked Clare, “our servant said the cook was queen + of the kitchen: I don't want to be rude, ma'am, but I must do as she told + me.” + </p> + <p> + “She never told you to bring that mangy animal in here!” + </p> + <p> + “She knew he would follow me, and she said nothing about him. But he's not + mangy. He hasn't enough to eat to be mangy. He's as lean as a dried fish!” + </p> + <p> + The housemaid, being fat, was inclined to think the remark personal; but + Clare looked up at her with such clear, honest, simple eyes, that she + forgot the notion, and thought what a wonderfully nice boy he looked. + </p> + <p> + “He's shamefully poor, though! His clothes ain't even decent!” she + remarked to herself. + </p> + <p> + And certainly the white skin did look through in several places. + </p> + <p> + “You won't let him put his nose in anything, will you?” she said quite + gently, returning his smile with a very pleasant one of her own. + </p> + <p> + “Abdiel is too much of a gentleman to do it,” he answered. + </p> + <p> + “A dog a gentleman!” rejoined the housemaid with a merry laugh, willing to + draw him out. + </p> + <p> + “Abdiel can be hungry and not greedy,” answered Clare, and the young woman + was silent. + </p> + <p> + Miss Tempest and Mrs. Mereweather had all this time been turning over the + question of what was to be done with the strange boy. They agreed it was + too bad that anyone willing to work should be prevented from earning even + a day's victuals by the bad temper of a gardener. But his mistress did not + want to send the man away. She had found him scrupulously honest, as is + many a bad-tempered man, and she did not like changes. The cook on her + part had taken such a fancy to Clare that she did not want him set to + garden-work; she would have him at once into the house, and begin training + him for a page. Now Miss Tempest was greatly desiring the same thing, but + in dread of what the cook would say, and was delighted, therefore, when + the first suggestion of it came from Mrs. Mereweather herself. The only + obstacle in the cook's eyes was that same long, spectral dog. The boy + could not be such a fool, however,—she said, not being a lover of + animals—as let a wretched beast like that come betwixt him and a + good situation! + </p> + <p> + “It's all right, Clare,” said Mrs. Mereweather, entering her queendom so + radiant within that she could not repress the outshine of her pleasure. + “Mis'ess an' me, we've arranged it all. You're to help me in the kitchen; + an' if you can do what you're told, an' are willin' to learn, we'll soon + get you out of your troubles. There's but one thing in the way.” + </p> + <p> + “What is it, please?” asked Clare. + </p> + <p> + “The dog, of course! You must part with the dog.” + </p> + <p> + “That I cannot do,” returned Clare quietly, but with countenance fallen + and sorrowful. “—Come, Abdiel!” + </p> + <p> + The dog started up, every hair of him full of electric vitality. + </p> + <p> + “You don't mean you're going to walk yourself off in such a beastly + ungrateful fashion—an' all for a miserable cur!” exclaimed the cook. + </p> + <p> + “The lady has been most kind to us, and we're grateful to her, and ready + to work for her if she will let us;—ain't we, Abdiel? But Abdiel has + done far more for me than Miss Tempest! To part with Abdiel, and leave him + to starve, or get into bad company, would be sheer ingratitude. I should + be a creature such as Miss Tempest ought to have nothing to do with: I + might serve her as that young butler I told her of! It's just as bad to be + ungrateful to a dog as to any other person. Besides, he wouldn't leave me. + He would be always hanging about.” + </p> + <p> + “John would soon knock him on the head.” + </p> + <p> + “Would he, Abdiel?” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + The dog looked up in his master's face with such a comical answer in his + own, that the cook burst out laughing, and began to like Abdiel. + </p> + <p> + “But you don't really mean to say,” she persisted, “that you'd go off + again on the tramp, to be as cold and hungry again to-morrow as you were + yesterday—and all for the sake of a dog? A dog ain't a Christian!” + </p> + <p> + “Abdiel's more of a Christian than some I know,” answered Clare: “he does + what his master tells him.” + </p> + <p> + “There's something in that!” said the cook. + </p> + <p> + “If I parted with Abdiel, I could never hold up my head among the angels,” + insisted Clare. “Think what harm it might do him! He could trust nobody + after, his goodness might give way! He might grow worse than Tommy!—No; + I've got to take care of Abdiel, and Abdiel's got to take care of me!—'Ain't + you, Abby?” + </p> + <p> + “We can't have him here in the kitchen nohow!” said the cook in relenting + tone. + </p> + <p> + “Poor fellow!” said the housemaid kindly. + </p> + <p> + The dog turned to her and wagged his tail + </p> + <p> + “What wouldn't I give for a lover like that!” said the housemaid—but + whether of Clare or the dog I cannot say. + </p> + <p> + “I know what I shall do!” cried Clare, in sudden resolve. “I will ask Miss + Tempest to have him up-stairs with her, and when she is tired of either of + us, we will go away together.” + </p> + <p> + “A probable thing!” returned the cook. “A lady like Miss Tempest with a + dog like that about her! She'd be eaten up alive with fleas! In ten + minutes she would!” + </p> + <p> + “No fear of that!” rejoined Clare. “Abdiel catches all his <i>own</i> + fleas!—Don't you, Abby?” + </p> + <p> + The dog instantly began to burrow in his fell of hair—an answer + which might be taken either of two ways: it might indicate comprehension + and corroboration of his master, or the necessity for a fresh hunt. The + women laughed, much amused. + </p> + <p> + “Look here!” said Clare. “Let me have a tub of water—warm, if you + please—he likes that: I tried him once, passing a factory, where a + lot of it was running to waste. Then, with the help of a bit of soap, I'll + show you a body of hair to astonish you.” + </p> + <p> + “What breed is he?” asked the housemaid. + </p> + <p> + “He's all the true breeds under the sun, I fancy,” returned his master; + “but the most of him seems of the sky-blue terrier sort.” + </p> + <p> + The more they talked with Clare, the better the women liked him. They got + him a tub and plenty of warm water. Abdiel was nothing loath to be plunged + in, and Clare washed him thoroughly. Taken out and dried, he seemed no + more for a lady's chamber unmeet. + </p> + <p> + “Now,” said Clare, “will you please ask Miss Tempest if I may bring him on + to the lawn, and show her some of his tricks?” + </p> + <p> + The good lady was much pleased with the cleverness and instant obedience + of the little animal. Clare proposed that she should keep him by her. + </p> + <p> + “But will he stay with me? and will he do what <i>I</i> tell him?” she + asked. + </p> + <p> + Clare took the dog aside, and talked to him. He told him what he was going + to do, and what he expected of him. How much Abdiel understood, who can + tell! but when his master laid him down at Miss Tempest's feet, there he + lay; and when Clare went with the cook, he did not move, though he cast + many a wistful glance after the lord of his heart. When his new mistress + went into the house, he followed her submissively, his head hanging, and + his tail motionless. He soon recovered his cheerfulness, however, and + seemed to know that his friend had not abandoned him. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0055" id="link2HCH0055"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LV. The wheel rests for a time. + </h2> + <p> + That part of the human race which is fond of dolls, may now imagine the + pleasure of the cook in going to the town in the omnibus to buy everything + for a live doll so big as Clare! In a very few days she had him dressed to + her heart's content, and the satisfaction of her mistress, who would not + have him in livery, but in a plain suit of dark blue cloth: for she loved + blue, all her men-people being, or having been in the navy. Thus dressed, + he looked as much of a gentleman as before: his look of refinement had + owed nothing to the contrast of his rags. Better clothes make not a few + seem commoner. + </p> + <p> + When Mrs. Mereweather came back from the town the first day, she found + that the ragged boy had got her kitchen and scullery as nice and clean, + and everything as ready to her hand, as if she had got her work done + before she went, which the omnibus would not permit. This rejoiced her + much; but being a woman of experience, she continued a little anxious lest + his sweet ways should go after his rags, lest his new garments should + breed bumptiousness and bad manners. For such a change is no unfrequent + result of prosperity. But such had been Mr. Porson's teaching and example, + such Mrs. Person's management, and such the responsiveness of the boy's + disposition, that the thought never came to him whether this or that was a + thing fit for him to do: if the thing was a right thing, and had to be + done, why should not he do it as well as another! To earn his own and + Abdiel's bread, he would do anything honest, setting up his back at + nothing. But when about a thing, he forgot even his obligation to do it, + in the glad endeavour to do it well. + </p> + <p> + As the days went on, Mrs. Mereweather was not once disappointed in him. He + did everything with such a will that both she and the housemaid were + always ready to spare and help him. Very soon they began to grow tender + over him; and on pretence of his being the earlier drest to open the door, + did certain things themselves which he had been quite content to do, but + which they did not like seeing him do. Many—I am afraid most boys + would have presumed on their generosity, but Clare was nowise injured by + it. + </p> + <p> + Nothing could be kinder than the way his mistress treated him. Having lent + him some books, and at once perceived that he was careful of them, she let + him have the run of her library when his day's work was over. For he not + only read but respected books. Nothing shows vulgarity more than the way + in which some people treat books. No gentleman would write his remarks on + the margins of another person's book; no lady would brush her hair as she + read one of her own. + </p> + <p> + From hungry days and cold nights, Clare and Abdiel found themselves <i>in + clover</i>—the phrase surely of some lover of cows!—and they + were more than content. Clare had longed so much for work, and had for so + many a weary day sought it in vain, that he valued it now just because it + was work. And he seemed to know instinctively that a man ranks, not + according to the thing he does, but according to the way he does it. In + life it is far higher to do an inferior thing well than to do a superior + thing passably. + </p> + <p> + Clare made good use of his privileges, and read much, educating himself + none the worse that he did it unconsciously. He read whatever came in his + way. He read really—not as most people read, leaving the sentences + behind them like so many unbroken nuts, the kernel of whose meaning they + have not seen. He learned more than most boys at school, more even than + most young men at college; for it is not what one knows, but what one + uses, that is the true measure of learning. Whatever he read, he read from + the point of practice. In history or romance he saw—not merely what + a man ought to be or do, but what he himself must, at that moment, be or + do. There is a very common sort of man calling himself practical, but + neglecting to practise the most important things, who would laugh at the + idea of Clare being practical, seeing he did not trouble his head about + money, or “getting on in the world”—what servants call “bettering + themselves;” but such a practical man will find he has been but a + practical fool. Clare took heed to do what was right, and grow a better + man. Such a life is the only really practical one. + </p> + <p> + People wondered how Miss Tempest had managed to get hold of such a + nice-looking page, and the good lady was flattered by their wonder. But + she knew the world too well to be sure of him yet. She knew that it is + difficult, in the human tree, to distinguish between blossom and fruit. + Deeds of lovely impulse are the blossom; unvarying, determined Tightness + is the fruit. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0056" id="link2HCH0056"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LVI. Strategy. + </h2> + <p> + Miss Tempest was the last of an old family, with scarce a relation, and no + near one, in the world. Hence the pieces of personal property that had + continued in the possession of various branches of the family after land + and money, through fault or misfortune, were gone, had mostly drifted into + the small pool of Miss Tempest's life now slowly sinking in the sands of + time, there to gleam and sparkle out their tale of its old splendour. She + did not think often of their money-worth: had she done so, she would have + kept them at her banker's; but she valued them greatly both for their + beauty and their associations, constantly using as many of them as she + could. More than one of her friends had repeatedly tried to persuade her + that it was not prudent to have so much plate and so many jewels in the + house, for the fact was sure to be known where it was least desirable it + should: she always said she would think about it. At times she would for a + moment contemplate sending her valuables to the bank; but her next thought—by + no means an unwise one—would always be, “Of what use will they be at + the bank? I might as well not have them at all! Better sell them and do + some good with the money!—No; I must have them about me!” + </p> + <p> + There are predatory persons in every large town, who either know or are + learning to know the houses in it worth the risk of robbing. When it falls + to the lot of this or that house to be attempted, one of the gang will + make the acquaintance of some servant in it, with the object of + discovering beforehand where its treasure lies, and so reducing the time + to be spent in it, and the risk of frustration or capture. Often they + seduce one of the household to let them in, or hand out the things they + want. Any such gang, however, must soon have become convinced that at Miss + Tempest's corruption was impossible, and that they could avail themselves + solely of their own internal resources. + </p> + <p> + It was well now for Miss Tempest that she was so faithful herself as to + encourage faithfulness in others: gladly would she have had Abdiel sleep + in her room, but she would not take the pleasure of his company from his + old master and companion in suffering. The dog therefore slept on Clare's + bed, just as he did when the bed was as hard to define as to lie upon, + only now he had to take the part neither of blanket nor hot bottle. + </p> + <p> + One night, about half-past twelve, watchful even in slumber, he sprang up + in his lair at his master's feet, listened a moment, gave a low growl, + again listened, and gave another growl. Clare woke, and found his bed + trembling with the tremor of his little four-footed guardian. Telling him + to keep quiet, he rose on his elbow, and in his turn listened, but could + hear nothing. He thought then he would light his candle and go down, but + concluded it wiser to descend without a light, and listen under cloak of + the darkness. If he could but save Miss Tempest from a fright! He crept + out of bed, and went first to the window—a small one in the + narrowing of the gable-wall of his attic room: the night was warm, and, + loving the night air, he had it open. Hearkening there for a moment, he + thought he heard a slight movement below. Very softly he put out his head, + and looked down. There was no moon, but in the momentary flash of a + lantern he caught sight of a small pair of legs disappearing inside the + scullery window, which was almost under his own. Swift and noiseless he + hurried down, and reached the scullery door just in time for a little + fellow who came stealing out of it, to run against him. + </p> + <p> + Now Clare had heard the housemaid read enough from the newspapers to + guess, the moment he looked from the garret window, that the legs he saw + were those of a boy sent in to open a door or window, and when the boy, + feeling his way in the dark, came against him, he gripped him by the + throat with the squeeze that used to silence Tommy. The prowler knew the + squeeze. The moment Clare relaxed it, in a piping whisper came the words, + </p> + <p> + “Clare! Clare! they said they'd kill me if I didn't!” + </p> + <p> + “Didn't what?” + </p> + <p> + “Open the door to them.” + </p> + <p> + “If you utter one whimper, I'll throttle you,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + He tightened his grasp for an instant, and Tommy, who had not forgotten + that what Clare said, he did, immediately gave in, and was led away. Clare + took him in his arms and carried him to his room, tied him hand and foot, + and left him on the floor, fast to the bedstead. Then he crept swiftly to + the servants' room, and with some difficulty waking them, told them what + he had done, and asked them to help him. + </p> + <p> + Both women of sense and courage, they undertook at once to do their part. + But when he proposed that they should open a window, as if it were done by + Tommy, and so enticing the burglars to enter, secure the first of them, + they, naturally enough, and wisely too, declined to encounter the risk. + </p> + <p> + The burglars, perplexed by the lack of any sign from Tommy yet the utter + quiet of the house, concluded probably that he had fallen somewhere, and + was lying either insensible, or unable to move and afraid to cry out—in + which case they would be at the mercy of what he might say when he was + found. + </p> + <p> + Those within could hear as little noise without. They went from door to + window, wherever an attempt might be made, but all was still. Then it + occurred to Clare that he had left the scullery window unwatched. He + hastened to it—and was but just in time: two long thin legs were + sticking through, and showed by their movements that considerable effort + was being made by the body that belonged to them, to enter after them. + Legs first was the wrong way, but the youth feared the unknown fate of + Tommy, and being pig-headed, would go that way or not at all. + </p> + <p> + A boy in courage equal to Clare, but of less coolness, would at once have + made war on the intrusive legs; but Clare bethought him that, so long as + that body filled the window, no other body could pass that way; so it + would be well to keep it there, a cork to the house, making it like the + nest of a trap-door-spider. He begged the women, therefore, who had + followed him, to lay hold each of an ankle, and stick to it like a clamp, + while he ran to get some string. + </p> + <p> + The women, entering heartily into the business, held on bravely. The owner + of the legs made vigorous efforts to release them, more anxious a good + deal to get out than he had been to get in, but he was not very strong, + and had no scope. His accomplices laid hold of him and pulled; then, with + good mother-wit, the women pulled away from each other, and so made of his + legs a wedge. + </p> + <p> + Clare came back with a piece of clothes-line, one end of which he slipped + with a running knot round one ankle, and the other in like fashion round + the other. Then he cut the line in halves, and drawing them over two hooks + in the ceiling, some distance apart, so that the legs continued widespread + like a V upside down, hauled the feet up as high as he could, and fastened + the ends of the lines. Hold lines and hooks, it was now impossible to draw + the fellow out. + </p> + <p> + Leaving the women to watch, and telling them to keep a hand on each of the + lines because the scullery was pitch-dark, he went next to his room and + looked again from the window. He feared they might be trying to get in at + some other place, for they would not readily abandon their accomplices, + and doubtless knew what a small household it was! He would see first, + therefore, what was doing outside the scullery, and then make a round of + doors and windows! + </p> + <p> + Right under him when he looked out, stood a short, burly figure; another + man was taking intermittent hauls at the arms of their leg-tied companion, + regardless of his stifled cries of pain when he did so. Clare went and + fetched his water-jug, which was half full, and leaning out once more, + with the jug upright in his two hands, moved it this way and that until he + had it, as nearly as he could determine, just over the man beneath him, + and then dropped it. The jug fell plumb, and might have killed the man but + that he bent his head at the moment, and received it between his + shoulders. It knocked the breath out of him, and he lay motionless. The + other man fled. The window-stopper, hearing the crash of the jug, wrenched + and kicked and struggled, but in vain. There he had to wait the sunrise, + for not a moment sooner would the cook open the door. + </p> + <p> + When they went out at last, the stout man too was gone. He had risen and + staggered into the shrubbery, and there fallen, but had risen once more + and got away. + </p> + <p> + Their captive pretended to be all but dead, thinking to move their pity + and be set free. But Clare went to the next house and got the man-servant + there to go for the police, begging him to make haste: he knew that his + tender-hearted mistress, if she came down before the police arrived, would + certainly let the fellow go, and Tommy with him; and he was determined the + law should have its way if he could compass it What hope was there for the + wretched Tommy if he was allowed to escape! And what right had they to let + such people loose on their neighbours! It was selfishness to indulge one's + own pity to the danger of others! He would be his brother's keeper by + holding on to his brother's enemy! + </p> + <p> + Going at last to his room, he found Tommy asleep. The boy was better + dressed, but no cleaner than when first he knew him. Clare proceeded to + wash and dress. Tommy woke, and lay staring, but did not utter a sound. + </p> + <p> + “Have your sleep out,” said Clare. “The police won't be here, I daresay, + for an hour yet.” + </p> + <p> + “I believe you!” returned Tommy, as impudent as ever. His contemplation of + Clare had revived his old contempt for him. “I mean to go. I 'ain't done + nothing.” + </p> + <p> + “Go, then,” said Clare, and took no more heed of him. + </p> + <p> + “If it's manners you want, Clare,” resumed Tommy, “<i>please</i> let me + go!” + </p> + <p> + Clare turned and looked at him. The evil expression was hardened on his + countenance. He gave him no answer. + </p> + <p> + “You ain't never agoin' to turn agin an old pal, aire you?” said Tommy. + </p> + <p> + “I ain't a pal of yours, Tommy, or of any other thief's!” answered Clare. + </p> + <p> + “I'll take my oath on it to the beak!” + </p> + <p> + “You'll soon have the chance; I've sent for the police.” Tommy changed his + tone. + </p> + <p> + “Please, Clare, let me go,” he whined. + </p> + <p> + “I will not. I did what I could for you before, and I'll do what I can for + you now. You must go with the police.” + </p> + <p> + Tommy began to blubber, or pretend—Clare could not tell which. + </p> + <p> + “This beastly string's a cuttin' into me!” he sobbed. + </p> + <p> + Clare examined it, and found it easy enough. + </p> + <p> + “I won't undo one knot,” he answered, “until there's a policeman in the + room. If you make a noise, I will stuff your mouth.” + </p> + <p> + His dread was that his mistress might hear, and spoil all. “It's her + house,” he said to himself, “but they're my captives!” + </p> + <p> + Tommy lay still, and the police came. + </p> + <p> + When they untied and drew out the cork of the scullery window, Clare + thought he had seen him before, but could not remember where. One of the + policemen, however, the moment his eyes fell on his face, cried out + joyfully, + </p> + <p> + “Ah, ha, my beauty! I've been a lookin' for you!” + </p> + <p> + “Never set eyes on ye afore,” growled the fellow. + </p> + <p> + “Don't ye say now ye ain't a dear friend o' mine,” insisted the policeman, + “when I carry yer pictur' in my bosom!” + </p> + <p> + He drew out a pocket-book, and from it a photograph, at which he gazed + with satisfaction, comparing it with the face before him. In another + moment Clare recognized the lad sent by Maidstone to exchange band-boxes + with him. + </p> + <p> + “Her majesty the queen wants you for that robbery, you know!” said the + policeman. + </p> + <p> + A boy who loved romance and generosity more than truth and righteousness, + would now have regretted the chance he had lost of doing a fine action, + and sought yet to set the rascal free. There are men who cheat and make + presents; there are men who are saints abroad and churls at home, as + Bunyan says; there are men who screw down the wages of their clerks and + leave vast sums to the poor; men who build churches with the proceeds of + drunkenness; men who promote bubble companies and have prayers in their + families morning and evening; men, in a word, who can be very generous + with what is not their own; for nothing ill-gotten is a man's own any more + than the money in a thief's pocket: Clare was not of the contemptible + order of the falsely generous. + </p> + <p> + Profiting, doubtless, by Maidstone's own example, the fellow had, as Clare + now learned, run away from his master, carrying with him the contents of + the till: whether he deserved punishment more than his master, may be left + undiscussed. + </p> + <p> + When first Miss Tempest's friends heard of the attempt to break into her + house, they said—what could she expect if she took tramps into her + service! They were consider-ably astonished, however, when they read in + the newspaper the terms in which the magistrate had spoken of the + admirable courage and contrivance of Miss Tempest's page, and the + resolution with which the women of her household had seconded him. If + every third house were as well defended, he said, the crime of burglary + would disappear. + </p> + <p> + After the trial, Clare begged and was granted an interview with the + magistrate. He told him what he knew about Tommy, and entreated he might + be sent to some reformatory, to be kept from bad company until he was able + to distinguish between right and wrong, which he thought he hardly could + at present The magistrate promised it should be done, and with kind words + dismissed him. + </p> + <p> + Things returned to their old way at Miss Tempest's. Her friends never + doubted she would now at last commit her plate to her banker's strong + room, but they found themselves mistaken: she was convinced that, with + such servants and Abdiel, it was safe where it was. + </p> + <p> + The leader of the gang, injured by Clare's water-jug, was soon after + captured, and the gang was broken up. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0057" id="link2HCH0057"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LVII. Ann Shotover. + </h2> + <p> + So void of self-assertion was Clare, so prompt at the call of whoever + needed him, so quiet yet so quick, so silent in his sympathetic + ministrations, so studious and so capable, that, after two years, Miss + Tempest began to feel she ought to do what she could to “advance his + prospects,” even at the loss to herself of his services. + </p> + <p> + He never came to regard Miss Tempest as he did the other women who had + saved him: he never thought of her as his fourth mother. Truly good and + kind she was, but she had a certain manner which prevented him from + feeling entirely comfortable with her. It did not escape him, however, + that Abdiel was thoroughly at his ease in her company; and he believed + therefore that the dog knew her better, or at least was more just to her, + than he. + </p> + <p> + The fact was Miss Tempest kept down all her feelings, with a vague sense + that to show them would be to waste her substance: it was the one shape + that the yet lingering selfishness of a very unselfish person took. Thus + she kept him at a distance, and he stayed at a distance, she on her part + wondering that he did not open out to her more, but neither doubting that + all was right between them. Nothing, indeed, was wrong—only they + might have come a little nearer. Perhaps, also, Miss Tempest was a little + too conscious of being his patroness, his earthly saviour. + </p> + <p> + It was natural that, after the defeated robbery, Clare should become a + little known to the friends of the mistress he had so well served; when, + therefore, Miss Tempest spoke to her banker concerning the ability of her + page, mentioning that, in his spare time, he had been reading hard, as + well as attending an evening-school for mathematics, where he gained much + approbation from his master, she spoke of one already known by him to one + accustomed to regard character. + </p> + <p> + The banker listened with a solemn listening from which she could not tell + what he was thinking. No one ever could tell what Mr. Shotover was + thinking: his face was not half a face; it was more a mask than a face. + High in the world's regard, rich, and of unquestioned integrity, he was + believed to have gathered a large fortune; but he kept his affairs to + himself. That he liked his own way so much as never to yield it, I give up + to the admiration of such as himself: often kind—when the required + mode of the kindness pleased him, a constant church-goer and giver of + money, always saying less the more he made up his mind, he had generally + no trouble in getting it. + </p> + <p> + Priding himself on his moral discrimination, he had, now and then, as + suited his need, taken from a lower position a young man he thought would + serve his purpose, and modelled him to it. He had had his eye on Clare + ever since reading the magistrate's eulogy of his contrivance and courage; + but when Miss Tempest spoke, he had not made up his mind about him, for + something in the boy repelled him. He had scarcely troubled himself to ask + what it was, nor do I believe he could have discovered, for the root of + the repulsion lay in himself. + </p> + <p> + Moved in part, however, by the representations of Miss Tempest, in part + also, I think, by a desire to discover that the boy was a hypocrite, Mr. + Shotover consented to give him a trial, whereupon Miss Tempest made haste + to disclose to her <i>protegé</i> the grand thing she had done for him. + </p> + <p> + She was disappointed at the coolness and lack of interest with which Clare + heard her great news. She could not but be gratified that he did not want + to leave her, but she was annoyed that he seemed unaware of any advantage + to be gained in doing so—high as the social ascent from servitude to + clerkship would by most be considered. But Clare's horizon was not that of + the world. He had no inclination to more of figures and less of persons. + Miss Tempest, however, insisting that she knew what was best for him, and + what it was therefore his duty to do, he listened in respectful silence to + all she had to say. But what she counted her most powerful argument—that + he owed it to himself to rise in the world—did not even touch him, + did not move the slightest response in a mind nobly devoid of ambition. + Her argument was in truth nonsense; for a man owes himself nothing, owes + God everything, and owes his neighbour whatever his own conscience goes on + to require of him for his neighbour. Feeling at the same time, however, + that she had a huge claim on his compliance with her wishes, Clare + consented to leave her kitchen for her friend's bank, where he had of + course to take the lowest position, one counted by the rest of the clerks, + especially the one just out of it, <i>menial</i>, requiring him to be in + the bank earlier by half an hour than the others, to be the last to go + away at night, and to sleep in the house—where a not uncomfortable + room in the attic story was appointed him. + </p> + <p> + Mr. Shotover himself lived above the bank—with his family, + consisting of his wife and two daughters. Mrs. Shotover suffered from a + terrible disease—that of thinking herself ill when nothing was the + matter with her except her paramount interest in herself—the source + of at least half the incurable disease among idle people. The elder + daughter was a high-spirited girl about twenty, with a frank, friendly + manner, indicating what God meant her to be, not what she was, or had yet + chosen to be. She was not really frank, and seemed far more friendly than + she was, being more selfish than she knew, and far more selfish than she + seemed: she was merry, and that goes a great way in seeming. Her mother + spent no regard upon her; her heart was too full of herself to have in it + room for a grown-up daughter as well, with interests of her own. The + younger was a child about six, of whom the mother took not so much care by + half as a tigress of her cub. + </p> + <p> + One morning, a little before eight o'clock, as Clare was coming down from + his room to open the windows of the bank, he just saved himself from + tumbling over something on the attic stair, which was dark, and at that + point took rather a sharp turn. The something was a child, who gave a low + cry, and started up to run away: there was not light enough for either to + discern easily what the other was like. But Clare, to whom childhood was + the strongest attraction he yet knew, bent down his face from where he + stood on the step above her, and its moonlight glow of love and faith + shone clear in the eyes of the little girl. The moment she saw his smile, + she knew the soul that was the light of the smile, and her doll dropped + from her hands as she raised them to lay her arms gently about his neck. + </p> + <p> + “Oh!” she said, “you're come!” + </p> + <p> + He saw now, in the dusk, a pale, ordinary little face, with rather large + gray eyes, a rather characterless, tiny, up-turned nose, and a rather + pretty mouth. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, little one. Were you expecting me?” he returned, with his arms about + her. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” she answered, in the tone of one stating what the other must know. + </p> + <p> + “How was it I frightened you, then?” + </p> + <p> + “Only at first I thought you was an ogre! That was before I saw you. Then + I knew!” + </p> + <p> + “Who told you I was coming?” + </p> + <p> + “Nobody. Nobody knew you was coming but me. I've known it—oh, for + such a time!—ever since I was born, I think!” + </p> + <p> + She turned her head a little and looked down where the doll lay a step or + two below. + </p> + <p> + “You can go now, dolly,” she said. “I don't want you any more.” Here she + paused a while, as if listening to a reply, then went on: “I am much + obliged to you, dolly; but what am I to do with you? You won't never + speak! It has made me quite sad many a time, you know very well! But you + can't help it! So go away, please, and be nobody, for you never would be + anybody! I did my best to get you to be somebody, but you wouldn't! Thank + you all the same! I will take you and put you where you can be as dull as + you please, and nobody will mind.”—Here she left Clare, went down, + and lifted her plaything.—“Dolly, dolly,” she resumed, “he's come! I + knew he would! And you don't know it because you're nobody!” + </p> + <p> + Without looking back, or a word of adieu to Clare, she went slowly down + the steps, one by one, with the doll in her arms, manifesting for it + neither contempt nor tenderness. Many a child would have carried the + discrowned favourite by one leg; she carried her in both hands. + </p> + <p> + Clare waited a while on the narrow, closed-in, wooden stair, not a little + wondering, and full of thought. His wonder, however, had no puzzlement in + it. The child's behaviour involved no difficulty. The two existences came + together, and each understood the other in virtue of its essential nature. + In after years Clare could put the thing into such words; he sought none + at the time. The child was lonely. She had done her best with her doll, + but it had failed her. It was not companionable. The moment she looked in + Clare's face, she knew that he loved her, and that she had been waiting + for <i>him</i>! She was not surprised to see him; how should it be + otherwise than just so! He was come: good bye, dolly! The child had + imagination—next to conscience the strongest ally of common sense. + She knew, like St. Paul, that an idol is nothing. As men and women grow in + imagination and common sense, more and more will sacred silly dolls be + cast to the moles and the bats. But pretty Fancy and limping Logic are + powerful usurpers in commonplace minds. + </p> + <p> + Clare saw nothing more of her that day, neither tried to see her; but he + did his work in an atmosphere of roses. The work was not nearly so + interesting as house-work, but Clare was an honest gentleman, therefore + did it well: that it was not interesting was of no account; it was his + work! But to know that a child was in the house, not merely a child for + him to love, but a child that already loved him so that he could be her + servant indeed, changed the stupid bank almost into the dome of the + angels. + </p> + <p> + His fellow clerks took little notice of him beyond what, in the routine of + the day, was unavoidable. He had been a page-boy: the less they did with + him the better! Were they not wronged by his introduction into their + company? The poorest creature of them believed he would have served out + the burglars better if the chance had been his. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0058" id="link2HCH0058"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LVIII. Child-talk. + </h2> + <p> + As Clare came down the next morning but one, there was the child again on + the dark narrow stair. She had no doll. Her hands lay folded in her lap. + She sat on the same step, the very image of child-patience. As he + approached she did not move. I believe she held solemn revel of + expectation. He laid his hand on the whitey-brown hair smoothed flat on + her head with a brush dipped in water. Not much dressing was wasted on Ann—common + little name! + </p> + <p> + She rose, turned to him, and again laid her arms about his neck. No kiss + followed: she had not been taught to kiss. + </p> + <p> + “Where's dolly?” asked Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Nowhere. Buried,” answered the child. + </p> + <p> + “Where did you bury her? In the garden?” + </p> + <p> + “No. The garden wouldn't be nowhere!” + </p> + <p> + “Where, then?” + </p> + <p> + “Nowhere. I threw her out of the window.” + </p> + <p> + “Into the street?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes. She did fell on a horse's back, and he jumped. I was sorry.” + </p> + <p> + “It didn't hurt him. I hope it didn't hurt dolly!” + </p> + <p> + The moment he said it, Clare's heart reproached him: he was not talking + true! he was not talking out of his real heart to the child! Almost with + indignation she answered:— + </p> + <p> + “<i>Things</i> don't be hurt! Dolly was a thing! She's <i>no</i> thing + now!” + </p> + <p> + “Why?” + </p> + <p> + “Because she fell under the horse, and was seen no more.” + </p> + <p> + “Is she old enough,” thought Clare, “to read the Pilgrim's Progress?” + </p> + <p> + “Will you tell me, please,” he said, “<i>when</i> a thing is only a + thing?” + </p> + <p> + “When it won't mind what you do or say to it.” + </p> + <p> + “And when is a thing no thing any more?” + </p> + <p> + “When you never think of it again.” + </p> + <p> + “Is a fly a thing?” + </p> + <p> + “I <i>could</i> make a fly mind, only it would hurt it!” + </p> + <p> + “Of course we wouldn't do that!” + </p> + <p> + “No; we don't want to make a fly mind. It's not one of our creatures.” + </p> + <p> + Clare thought that was far enough in metaphysics for one morning. + </p> + <p> + “I waited for you yesterday,” he said, “but you didn't come!” + </p> + <p> + “Dolly didn't like to be buried. I mean, I didn't like burying dolly. I + cried and wouldn't come.” + </p> + <p> + “Then why did you bury dolly?” + </p> + <p> + “She <i>had</i> to be buried. I told you she couldn't <i>be</i> anybody! + So I <i>made</i> her be buried.” + </p> + <p> + “I see! I quite understand.—But what have you to amuse yourself with + now?” + </p> + <p> + “I don't want to be mused now. You's come! I'm growed up!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, of course!” answered Clare; but he was puzzled what to say next. + </p> + <p> + What could he do for her? Glad would he have been to take her down to the + sea, or to the docks, or into the country somewhere, till dinner-time, and + then after dinner take her out again! But there was his work—ugly, + stupid work that had to be done, as dolly <i>had</i> to be buried! Alas + for the child who has discarded her toys, and is suddenly growed up! What + is she to do with herself? Clare's coming had caused the loss of Ann's + former interests: he felt bound to make up to her for that loss. But how? + It was a serious question, and not being his own master, he could not in a + moment answer it. + </p> + <p> + “I wish I could stay with you all day!” he said. “But your papa wants me + in the bank. I must go.” + </p> + <p> + Clare had not had a good sight of the child, and was at a loss to think + what must be her age. Her language, both in form and utterance, was partly + precise and <i>grown-up</i>, and partly childish; but her wisdom was + child-like—and that is the opposite both of precise and childish. It + was the wisdom that comes of unity between thought and action. + </p> + <p> + “Is there anything I can do for you before I go—for I must go?” said + Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Who says <i>must</i> to you? Nurse says <i>must</i> to me.” + </p> + <p> + “Your papa says <i>must</i> to me.” + </p> + <p> + “If you didn't say <i>yes</i> when papa said <i>must</i>, what would come + next?” + </p> + <p> + “He would say, 'Go out of my house, and never come in again.'” + </p> + <p> + “And would you do it?” + </p> + <p> + “I must: the house is his, not mine.” + </p> + <p> + “If I didn't say <i>yes</i> when papa said <i>must</i>, what would + happen?” + </p> + <p> + “He would try to make you say it.” + </p> + <p> + “And if I wouldn't, would he say, 'Go out of my house and never come in + again'?” + </p> + <p> + “No; you are his little girl!” + </p> + <p> + “Then I think he shouldn't say it to you.—What is your name?” + </p> + <p> + “Clare.” + </p> + <p> + “Then, Clare, if my papa sends you out of his house, I will go with you.—You + wouldn't turn me out, would you, when I was a <i>little</i> naughty?” + </p> + <p> + “No; neither would your papa.” + </p> + <p> + “If he turned you out, it would be all the same. Where you go, I will go. + I must, you know! Would you mind if he said 'Go away'?” + </p> + <p> + “I should be very sorry to leave you.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but that's not going to be! Why do you stay with papa? Were you in + the house always—ever so long before I saw you?” + </p> + <p> + “No; a very little while only.” + </p> + <p> + “Did you come in from the street?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes; I came in from the street. Your papa pays me to work for him.” + </p> + <p> + “And if you wouldn't?” + </p> + <p> + “Then I should have no money, and nothing to eat, and nowhere to sleep at + night.” + </p> + <p> + “Would that make you uncomfable?” + </p> + <p> + “It would make me die.” + </p> + <p> + “Have you a papa?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but he's far away.” + </p> + <p> + “You could go to him, couldn't you?” + </p> + <p> + “One day I shall.” + </p> + <p> + “Why don't you go now, and take me?” + </p> + <p> + “Because he died.” + </p> + <p> + “What's <i>died</i>?” + </p> + <p> + “Went away out of sight, where we can't go to look for him till we go out + of sight too.” + </p> + <p> + “When will that be?” + </p> + <p> + “I don't know.” + </p> + <p> + “Does anybody know?” + </p> + <p> + “Nobody.” + </p> + <p> + “Then perhaps you will never go?” + </p> + <p> + “We must go; it's only that nobody knows when.” + </p> + <p> + “I think the when that nobody knows, mayn't never come.—Is that why + you have to work?” + </p> + <p> + “Everybody has to work one way or another.” + </p> + <p> + “I haven't to work!” + </p> + <p> + “If you don't work when you're old enough, you'll be miserable.” + </p> + <p> + “<i>You're</i> not old enough.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, yes, indeed I am! I've been working a long time now.” + </p> + <p> + “Where? Not for papa?” + </p> + <p> + “No; not for papa.” + </p> + <p> + “Why not? Why didn't you come sooner? Why didn't you come <i>much</i> + sooner—<i>ever</i> so much sooner? Why did you make me wait for you + all the time?” + </p> + <p> + “Nobody ever told me you were waiting.” + </p> + <p> + “Nobody ever told me you were coming, but I knew.” + </p> + <p> + “You had to wait for me, and you knew. I had to wait for you, and I didn't + know! When we have time, I will tell you all about myself, and how I've + been waiting too.” + </p> + <p> + “Waiting for me?” + </p> + <p> + “No.” + </p> + <p> + “Who for?” + </p> + <p> + “For my father and mother—and somebody else, I think.” + </p> + <p> + “That's me.” + </p> + <p> + “No; I'm waiting yet. I didn't know I was coming to you till I came, and + there you were!” + </p> + <p> + The child was silent for a moment. Then she said thoughtfully, + </p> + <p> + “You will tell me <i>all</i> about yourself! That <i>will</i> be nice!—Can + you tell stories?” she added. “—Of course you can! You can do <i>every</i>thing!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, no, I can't!” + </p> + <p> + “Can't you?” + </p> + <p> + “No; I can do <i>some</i> things—not many. I can love you, little + one!—Now I must go, or I shall be late, and nobody ever ought to be + late.” + </p> + <p> + “Go then. I will go to my nursery and wait again.” + </p> + <p> + She went down the stair without once looking behind her. Clare followed. + On the next floor she went one way to her nursery, and he another to the + back-stairs. + </p> + <p> + One of the causes and signs of Clare's manliness was, that he never aimed + at being a man. Many men continue childish because they are always trying + to act like men, instead of simply trying to do right. Such never develop + true manliness, Clare's manhood stole upon him unawares. That which at + once made him a man and kept him a child, was, that he had no regard for + anything but what was real, that is, true. + </p> + <p> + All the day the thought kept coming, what could he do for the little girl + Perhaps what stirred his feeling for her most, was a suspicion that she + was neglected. But the careless treatment of a nurse was better for her + than would have been the capricious blandishments and neglects of a mother + like Mrs. Shotover. Clare, however, knew nothing yet about Ann's mother. + He knew only, by the solemnly still ways of the child, that she must be + much left to her own resources, and was wonderfully developed in + consequence—whether healthily or not, he could not yet tell. The + practical question was—how to contrive to be her occasional + companion; how to offer to serve her. + </p> + <p> + After much thinking, he concluded that he must wait: opportunity might + suggest mode; and he would rather find than make opportunity! + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0059" id="link2HCH0059"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LIX. Lovers' walks. + </h2> + <p> + He had not long to wait. That very afternoon, going a message for the + head-clerk, he met Ann walking with a young lady—who must be Miss + Shotover. Neither sister seemed happy with the other. Ann was very white, + and so tired that she could but drag her little feet after her. Miss + Shotover, flushed with exertion, and annoyed with her part of nursemaid, + held her tight and hauled her along by the hand. She looked good-natured, + but not one of the ministering sort. Every now and then she would give the + little arm a pull, and say, though not <i>very</i> crossly, “Do come + along!” The child did not cry, but it was plain she suffered. It was plain + also she was doing her best to get home, and avoid rousing her sister's + tug. + </p> + <p> + Keen-sighted, Clare had recognized Ann at some distance, and as he + approached had a better opportunity than on the dark stair of seeing what + his little friend was like. He saw that her eyes were unusually clear, + and, paces away, could distinguish the blue veins on her forehead: she + looked even more delicate than he had thought her. The lines of her mouth + were straightened out with the painful effort she had to make to keep up + with her sister. Her nose continued insignificant, waiting to learn what + was expected of it. + </p> + <p> + For Miss Shotover, there was not a good feature in her face, and even to a + casual glance it might have suggested a measure of meanness. But a bright + complexion, and the youthful charm which vanishes with youth, are pleasant + in their season. Her figure was lithe, and in general she had a look of + fun; but at the moment heat and impatience clouded her countenance. + </p> + <p> + Clare stopped and lifted his hat. Then first the dazed child saw him, for + she was short-sighted, and her observation was dulled by weariness. She + said not a word, uttered no sound, only drew her hand from her sister's, + and held up her arms to her friend—in dumb prayer to be lifted above + the thorns of life, and borne along without pain. He caught her up. + </p> + <p> + “I beg your pardon, ma'am,” he said, “but the little one and I have met + before:—I live in the house, having the honour to be the youngest of + your father's clerks. If you will allow me, I will carry the child. She + looks tired!” + </p> + <p> + Miss Shotover was glad enough to be relieved of her clog, and gave smiling + consent. + </p> + <p> + “If you would be so kind as to carry her home,” she said, “I should be + able to do a little shopping!” + </p> + <p> + “You will not mind my taking her a little farther first, ma'am? I am on a + message for Mr. Woolrige. I will carry her all the way, and be very + careful of her.” + </p> + <p> + Miss Shotover was not one to cherish anxiety. She already knew Clare both + by report and by sight, and willingly yielded. Saying, with one of her + pleasant smiles, that she would hold him accountable for her, she sailed + away, like a sloop that had been dragging her anchor, but had now cut her + cable. Clare thought what a sweet-looking girl she was—and in truth + she was sweet-<i>looking</i>. Then, all his heart turned to the little one + in his arms. + </p> + <p> + What a walk was that for both of them! Little Ann seemed never to have + lived before: she was actually happy! She had been long waiting for Clare, + and he was come—and such as she had expected him! It was bliss to + glide thus along the busy street without the least exertion, looking down + on the heads of the people, safe above danger and fear amid swift-moving + things and the crowding confusions of life! To be in Clare's arms was + better than being in the little house on the elephant's back in her best + picture-book! True, little one! To be in the arms of love, be they ever so + weak, is better than to ride the grandest horse in all the stables of God—and + God would have you know it! Never mind your pale little face and your puny + nose! While your heart is ready to die for love-sake, you are blessed + among women! Only remember that to die of disappointment is not to die + either of or for love! + </p> + <p> + And to Clare, after all those days upon days during which only a dog would + come to his arms, what a glory of life it was to have a human child in + them, the little heart of the pale face beating against his side! He was + not going to forget Abdiel. Abdiel was not a fact to be forgotten. Abdiel + was not a doll, Abdiel was not a thing that would not come alive. Abdiel + was a true heart, a live soul, and Clare would love him for ever!—not + an atom the less that now he had one out upon whom a larger love was able + to flow! All true love makes abler to love. It is only false love, the + love of those who take their own meanest selfishness, their own pleasure + in being loved, for love, that shrinks and narrows the soul. + </p> + <p> + To the pale-faced, listening child, Clare talked much about the wonderful + Abdiel, and about the kind good Miss Tempest who was keeping him to live + again at length with his old master; and Ann loved the dog she had never + seen, because the dog loved the Clare who was come at last. + </p> + <p> + When they returned, Clare rang the house-bell, and gave up his charge to + the man who opened the door. Without word or tone, gesture or look of + objection, or even of disinclination, the child submitted to be taken from + Clare's loving embrace, and carried to a nurse who was neither glad nor + sorry to see her. + </p> + <p> + He had been so long gone that Mr. Woolrige found fault with him for it. + Clare told him he had met Miss Shotover with her sister, and the child + seemed so tired he had asked leave to carry her with him, Mr. Woolrige was + not pleased, but he said nothing; on the spot the clerks nicknamed him <i>Nursie</i>; + and Clare did his best to justify the appellation-he never lost a chance + of acting up to it, and always answered when they summoned him by it. + </p> + <p> + Before the week was ended, he sought an interview with Miss Shotover, and + asked her whether he might not take little Ann out for a walk whenever the + evening was fine. For at five o'clock the doors of the bank were shut, and + in half an hour after he was free. Miss Shotover said she saw no + objection, and would tell the nurse to have her ready as often as the + weather was fit; whereupon Clare left her with a gratitude far beyond any + degree of that emotion by her conceivable. The nurse, on her part, was + willing to gratify Clare, and not sorry to be rid of the child, who was + not one, indeed, to interest any ordinary woman. + </p> + <p> + The summer came and was peculiarly fine, and almost every evening Clare + might be seen taking his pleasure—neither like bank-clerk nor like + nurse-maid, for always he had little Ann in his arms, or was leading her + along with care and entire attention: he never let her walk except on + entreaty, and not always then. To his fellow clerks this proof of an utter + lack of dignity seemed consistent with his origin—of which they knew + nothing; they knew only his late position. To themselves they were fine + gentlemen with cigars in their mouths, and he was a lackey to the bone! To + himself Clare was the lover of a child; and about them he did not think. + Theirs was the life of a town; Clare's was a life of the universe. + </p> + <p> + The pair came speedily to understand and communicate like twin brother and + sister. Clare, as he carried her, always knew when Ann wanted a change of + position; Ann always knew when Clare began to grow weary—knew before + Clare himself—and would insist on walking. Neither could remember + how it came, but it grew a custom that, when they walked hand in hand, + Clare told her stories of his life and adventures; when he carried her, he + told her fairy-tales, which he could spin like a spider: she preferred the + former. + </p> + <p> + So neither bank nor nursery was any longer dreary. + </p> + <p> + At length came the gray, brooding winter, causing red fingers and aches + and chilblains. But it was not unfriendly to little Ann. True, she was not + permitted to go out in the evening any more, but Clare, with the help of + the cook, devoted to her his dinner-hour instead. It was no hardship to + eat from a basket in place of a table, to one who never troubled himself + as to the kind, quality, or quantity of his food itself. He had learned, + like a good soldier, to endure hardness. I have heard him say that never + did he enjoy a dinner more than when, in those homeless days of his + boyhood, he tore the flakes off a loaf fresh from the baker's oven, and + ate them as he walked along the street. The old highlanders of Scotland + were trained to think it the part of a gentleman not to mind what he ate—sign + of scant civilization, no doubt, in the eyes of some who now occupy but do + not fill their place—as time will show, when the call is for men to + fight, not to eat. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0060" id="link2HCH0060"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LX. The shoe-black. + </h2> + <p> + The head-clerk, while he had not a word against him, as he confessed to + Mr. Shotover, yet thought Clare would never make a man of business. When + pressed to say on what he grounded the opinion, he could only answer that + the lad did not seem to have his heart in it. But if, to be a man of + business, it is not enough to do one's duty scrupulously, but the very + heart must be in it, then is there something wrong with business. The + heart fares as its treasure: who would be content his heart should fare as + not a few sorts of treasure must? Mr. Woolrige passed no such judgment, + however, upon certain older young men in the bank, whose hearts certainly + were not in the business, but even worse posited. + </p> + <p> + One cold, miserable day, at once damp and frosty, on which it was quite + unfit to take Ann out, Clare, having eaten a hasty dinner, and followed it + with a walk, was returning through the town in good time for the + recommencement of business, when he came upon a little boy, at the corner + of a street, blowing his fingers, and stumping up and down the pavement to + keep his blood moving while he waited for a job: his brushes lay on the + top of his blacking-box on the curbstone. Clare saw that he was both + hungry and cold—states of sensation with which he was far too + familiar to look on the signs of them with indifference. To give him + something to do, and so something to eat, he went to his block and put his + foot on it. The boy bustled up, snatched at his brushes, and began + operations. But, whether from the coldness or incapacity of his hands, + Clare soon saw that his boots would not be polished that afternoon. + </p> + <p> + “You don't seem quite up to your business, my boy!” he said. “What's the + matter?” + </p> + <p> + The boy made no answer, but went on with his vain attempt. A moment more, + and Clare saw a tear fall on the boot he was at work upon. + </p> + <p> + “This won't do!” said Clare. “Let me look at <i>your</i> boots.” + </p> + <p> + The boy stood up, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. + </p> + <p> + “Ah!” said Clare, “I don't wonder you can't polish my boots, when you + don't care to polish your own!” + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir,” answered the boy, “it's Jim as does it! He's down wi' the + measles, an' I ain't up to it.” + </p> + <p> + “Look here, then! I'll give you a lesson,” said Clare. “Many's the boot + I've blacked. Up with your foot! I'll soon show you how the thing's done!” + </p> + <p> + “Please, sir,” objected the boy, “there ain't enough boot left to take a + polish!” + </p> + <p> + “We'll see about that!” returned Clare. “Put it up. I've worn worse in my + time.” + </p> + <p> + The boy obeyed. The boot was very bad, but there was enough leather to + carry some blacking, and the skin took the rest. + </p> + <p> + Clare was working away, growing pleasantly hot with the quick, sharp + motion, while two of his fellow clerks were strolling up on the other side + of the corner, who had been having more with their lunch than was good for + them. Swinging round, they came upon a well dressed youth brushing a + ragged boy's boots. It was an odd sight, and one of them, whose name was + Marway, thought to get some fun out of the phenomenon. + </p> + <p> + “Here!” he cried, “I want my boots brushed.” + </p> + <p> + Clare rose to his feet, saying, + </p> + <p> + “Brush the gentleman's boots. I will finish yours after, and then you + shall finish mine.” + </p> + <p> + “Hullo, Nursie! it's you turned boot-black, is it?—Nice thing for + the office, Jack!” remarked Marway, who was the finest gentleman, and the + lowest blackguard among the clerks. + </p> + <p> + He put his foot on the block. The boy began his task, but did no better + with his boots than he had done with Clare's. + </p> + <p> + “Soul of an ass!” cried Marway, “are you going to keep my foot there till + it freezes to the block? Why don't you do as Nursie tells you? <i>He</i> + knows how to brush a boot! <i>You</i> ain't worth your salt! You ain't fit + to black a donkey's hoofs!” + </p> + <p> + “Give me the brushes, my boy,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + The boy rose abashed, and obeyed. After a few of Clare's light rapid + strokes, the boots looked very different. + </p> + <p> + “Bravo, Nursie!” cried Marway. “There ain't a flunkey of you all could do + it better!” + </p> + <p> + Clare said nothing, finished the job, and stood up. Marway, turning on the + other heel as he set his foot down, said, “Thank you, Nursie!” and was + walking off. + </p> + <p> + “Please, Mr. Marway, give the boy his penny,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + But Marway wanted to <i>take a rise out of</i> Clare. + </p> + <p> + “The fool did nothing for me!” he answered. “He made my boot worse than it + was.” + </p> + <p> + “It was I did nothing for you, Mr. Marway,” rejoined Clare. “What I did, I + did for the boy.” + </p> + <p> + “Then let the boy pay you!” said Marway. + </p> + <p> + The shoe-black went into a sudden rage, caught up one of his brushes, and + flung it at Marway as he turned. It struck him on the side of the head. + Marway swore, stalked up to Clare and knocked him down, then strode away + with a grin. + </p> + <p> + The shoe-black sent his second brush whizzing past his ear, but he took no + notice. Clare got up, little the worse, only bruised. + </p> + <p> + “See what comes of doing things in a passion!” he said, as the boy came + back with the brushes he had hastened to secure. “Here's your penny! Put + up your foot.” + </p> + <p> + The boy did as he was told, but kept foaming out rage at the bloke that + had refused him his penny, and knocked down his friend. It did not occur + to him that he was himself the cause of the outrage, and that his friend + had suffered for him. Clare's head ached a good deal, but he polished the + boy's boots. Then he made him try again on his boots, when, warmed by his + rage, he did a little better. Clare gave him another penny, and went to + the bank. + </p> + <p> + Marway was not there, nor did he show himself for a day or two. Clare said + nothing about what had taken place, neither did the others. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0061" id="link2HCH0061"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LXI. A walk with consequences. + </h2> + <p> + Clare had been in the bank more than a year, and not yet had Mr. Shotover + discovered why he did not quite trust him. Had Clare known he did not, he + would have wondered that he trusted him with such a precious thing as his + little Ann. But was his child very precious to Mr. Shotover? When a man's + heart is in his business, that is, when he is set on making money, some + precious things are not so precious to him as they might be—among + the rest, the living God and the man's own life. He would pass Clare and + the child without even a nod to indicate approval, or a smile for the + small woman. He had, I presume, sufficient regard for the inoffensive + little thing to be content she should be happy, therefore did not + interfere with what his clerks counted so little to the honour of the + bank. But although, as I have said, he still doubted Clare, true eyes in + whatever head must have perceived that the child was in charge of an + angel. The countenance of Clare with Ann in his arms, was so peaceful, so + radiant of simple satisfaction, that surely there were some in that large + town who, seeing them, thought of the angels that do alway behold the face + of the Father in heaven. + </p> + <p> + One evening in the early summer, when they had resumed their walks after + five o'clock, they saw, in a waste place, where houses had been going to + be built for the last two years, a number of caravans drawn up in order. + </p> + <p> + A rush of hope filled the heart of Clare: what if it should be the + menagerie he knew so well! And, sure enough, there was Mr. Halliwell + superintending operations! But if Glum Gunn were about, he might find it + awkward with the child in his arms! Gunn might not respect even her! + Besides he ought to ask leave to take her! He would carry her home first, + and come again to see his third mother and all his old friends, with Pummy + and the lion and the rest of the creatures. + </p> + <p> + Little Ann was eager to know what those curious houses on wheels were. + Clare told her they were like her Noah's ark, full of beasts, only real, + live beasts, not beasts made of bits of stick. She became at once eager to + see them—the more eager that her contempt of things like life that + wouldn't come alive had been growing stronger ever since she threw her + doll out of the window. Clare told her he could not take her without first + asking leave. This puzzled her: Clare was her highest authority. + </p> + <p> + “But if <i>you</i> take me?” she said. + </p> + <p> + “Your papa and mamma might not like me to take you.” + </p> + <p> + “But I'm yours!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, you're mine—but not so much,” he added with a sigh, “as + theirs!” + </p> + <p> + “Ain't I?” she rejoined, in a tone of protesting astonishment mingled with + grief, and began to wriggle, wanting to get down. + </p> + <p> + Clare set her down, and would have held her, as usual, by the hand, but + she would not let him. She stood with her eyes on the ground, and her + little gray face looking like stone. It frightened Clare, and he remained + a moment silent, reviewing the situation. + </p> + <p> + “You see, little one,” he said at length, “you were theirs before I came! + You were sent to them. You are their own little girl, and we must mind + what they would like!” + </p> + <p> + “It was only till you came!” she argued. “They don't care <i>very</i> much + for me. Ask them, please, to sell me to you. I don't think they would want + much money for me! How many shillings do you think I am worth, Clare? Not + many, I hope!—Six?” + </p> + <p> + “You are worth more than all the money in your papa's bank,” answered + Clare, looking down at her lovingly. + </p> + <p> + The child's face fell. + </p> + <p> + “Am I?” she said. “I'm so sorry! I didn't know I was worth so much!—and + not yours!” she added, with a sigh that seemed to come from the very heart + of her being. “Then you're not able to buy me?” + </p> + <p> + “No, indeed, little one!” answered Clare. “Besides, papas don't sell their + little girls!” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, yes, they do! Gus said so to Trudie!” Clare knew that <i>Trudie</i> + meant her sister Gertrude. + </p> + <p> + “Who is Gus?” he asked. + </p> + <p> + “Trudie calls him Gus. I don't know more name to him. Perhaps they call + him something else in the bank.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh! he's in the bank, is he?” returned Clare. “Then I think I know him.” + </p> + <p> + “He said it to her one night in my nursery. Jane went down; I was in my + crib. They talked such a long time! I tried to go to sleep, but I + couldn't. I heard all what he said to her. It wasn't half so nice as what + you talk to me!” + </p> + <p> + This was not pleasant news to Clare. Augustus Marway was, if half the + tales of him were true, no fit person for his master's daughter to be + intimate with! He had once heard Mr. Shotover speak about gambling in such + terms of disapprobation as he had never heard him use about anything else; + and it was well known in the bank that Marway was in the company of + gamblers almost every night. He was so troubled, that at first he wished + the child had not told him. For what was he to do? Could it be right to + let the thing go on? Clare felt sure Mr. Shotover either did not know that + Marway gambled, or did not know that he talked in the nursery with his + daughter. But, alas, he could do nothing without telling, and they all + said none but the lowest of cads would carry tales! For the young men + thought it the part of gentlemen <i>to stick by each other</i>, and hide + from Mr. Shotover some things he had a right to know. But Clare saw that, + whatever they might think, he must act in the matter. Little Ann wondered + that he scarcely spoke to her all the way home. But she did not say + anything, for she too was troubled: she did not belong to Clare so much as + she had thought she did! + </p> + <p> + Clare reflected also as he went, how much he owed Ann's sister for letting + him have the little one. She had always spoken to him kindly too, and + never seemed, like the clerks, to look down upon him because he had been a + page-boy—though, he thought, if they were to be as often hungry as + he had been, they would be glad to be page-boys themselves! For himself, + he liked to be a page-boy! He would do anything for Miss Tempest! And he + must do what he could for Miss Shotover! It would be wicked to let her + marry a man that was wicked! He had himself seen him drunk! Would it be + fair, knowing she did not know, not to tell? Would it not be helping to + hurt her? Was he to be a coward and fear being called bad names? Was he, + for the sake of the good opinion of rascals, to take care of the rascal, + and let the lady take care of herself? There was this difficulty, however, + that he could assert nothing beyond having seen him drunk! + </p> + <p> + He carried Ann to the nursery, and set out for the menagerie. When he + knocked at the door of the house-caravan, Mrs. Halliwell opened it, stared + hardly an instant, threw her arms round his neck, and kissed him. + </p> + <p> + “Come in, come in, my boy!” she said. “It makes me a happy woman to see + you again. I've been just miserable over what might have befallen you, and + me with all that money of yours! I've got it by me safe, ready for you! I + lie awake nights and fancy Gunn has got hold of you, and made away with + you; then fall asleep and am sure of it. He's been gone several times, a + looking for you, I know! I think he's afraid of you; I know he hates you. + Mind you keep out of his sight; he'll do you a mischief if he has the + chance. He's the same as ever, a man to make life miserable.” + </p> + <p> + “I've never done him wrong,” said Clare, “and I'm not going to keep out of + his way as if I were afraid of him! I mean to come and see the animals + to-morrow.” + </p> + <p> + A great deal more passed between them. They had their tea together. Mr. + Halliwell, who did not care for tea, came and went several times, and now + the night was dark. Then they spoke again of Gunn. + </p> + <p> + “Well, I don't think he'll venture to interfere with you,” said Mrs. + Halliwell, “except he happens to be drunk.—But what's that talking? + <i>We</i>'re all quiet for the night. Listen.” + </p> + <p> + For some time Clare had been conscious of the whispered sounds of a + dialogue somewhere near, but had paid no attention. The voices were now + plainer than at first When his mother told him to listen, he did, and + thought he had heard one of them before. It was peculiar—that of an + old Jew whom he had seen several times at the bank. As the talking went + on, he began to think he knew the other voice also. It was that of + Augustus Marway. The two fancied themselves against a caravan full of wild + beasts. + </p> + <p> + Marway was the son of the port-admiral, who, late in life, married a silly + woman. She died young, but not before she had ruined her son, whose choice + company was the least respectable of the officers who came ashore from the + king's ships. + </p> + <p> + He had of late been playing deeper and having worse luck; and had borrowed + until no one would lend him a single sovereign more. His father knew, in a + vague way, how he was going on, and had nearly lost hope of his + reformation. Having yet large remains of a fine physical constitution, he + seldom failed to appear at the bank in the morning—if not quite in + time, yet within the margin of lateness that escaped rebuke. Mr. Shotover + was a connection by marriage, which gave Marway the privilege of being + regarded by Miss Shotover as a cousin—a privilege with desirable + possibilities contingent, making him anxious to retain the good opinion of + his employer. + </p> + <p> + Clare heard but a portion here and there of the conversation going on + outside the wooden wall; but it was plain nevertheless that Marway was + pressing a creditor to leave him alone until he was married, when he would + pay every shilling he owed him. + </p> + <p> + The young fellow had a persuasive tongue, and boasted he could get the + better of even a Jew. Clare heard the money-lender grant him a renewal for + three months, when, if Marway did not pay, or were not the accepted suitor + of the lady whose fortune was to redeem him, his creditor would take his + course. + </p> + <p> + The moment he perceived they were about to part, Clare hastened from the + caravan, and went along the edge of the waste ground, so as to meet Marway + on his road back to the town: at the corner of it they came jump together. + Marway started when Clare addressed him. Seeing, then, who claimed his + attention, he drew himself up. + </p> + <p> + “Well?” he said. + </p> + <p> + “Mr. Marway,” began Clare, “I heard a great deal of what passed between + you and old Lewin.” + </p> + <p> + Marway used worse than vulgar language at times, and he did so now, ending + with the words, + </p> + <p> + “A spy! a sneaking spy! Would you like to lick my boot? By Jove, you shall + know the taste of it!” + </p> + <p> + “Nobody minds being overheard who hasn't something to conceal! If I had + low secrets I would not stand up against the side of a caravan when I + wanted to talk about them. I was inside. Not to hear you I should have had + to stop my ears.” + </p> + <p> + “Why didn't you, then, you low-bred flunkey?” + </p> + <p> + “Because I had heard of you what made it my duty to listen.” + </p> + <p> + Marway cursed his insolence, and asked what he was doing in such a place. + He would report him, he said. + </p> + <p> + “What I was doing is my business,” answered Clare. “Had I known you for an + honest man I would not have listened to yours. I should have had no + right.” + </p> + <p> + “You tell me to my face I'm a swindler!” said Marway between his teeth, + letting out a blow at Clare, which he cleverly dodged. + </p> + <p> + “I do!” + </p> + <p> + “I don't know what you mean, but bitterly shall you repent your insolence, + you prying rascal! This is your sweet revenge for a blow you had not the + courage to return!—to dog me and get hold of my affairs! You cur! + You're going to turn informer next, of course, and bear false witness + against your neighbour! You shall repent it, I swear!” + </p> + <p> + “Will it be bearing false witness to say that Miss Shotover does not know + the sort of man who wants to marry her? Does she know why he wants to + marry her? Does her father know that you are in the clutches of a + money-lender?” + </p> + <p> + Marway caught hold of Clare and threatened to kill him. Clare did not + flinch, and he calmed down a little. + </p> + <p> + “What do you want to square it?” he growled. + </p> + <p> + “I don't understand you,” returned Clare. + </p> + <p> + “What's the size of your tongue-plaster?” + </p> + <p> + “I don't know much slang.” + </p> + <p> + “What bribe will silence you then? I hope that is plain enough—even + for <i>your</i> comprehension!” + </p> + <p> + “If I had meant to hold my tongue, I should have held it.” + </p> + <p> + “What do you want, then?” + </p> + <p> + “To keep you from marrying Miss Shotover.” + </p> + <p> + “By Jove! And suppose I kick you into the gutter, and tell you to mind + your own business—what then?” + </p> + <p> + “I will tell either your father or Mr. Shotover all about it.” + </p> + <p> + “Even you can't be such a fool! What good would it do you? You're not + after her yourself, are you?—Ha! ha!—that's it! I didn't nose + that!—But come, hang it! where's the <i>use</i>?—I'll give you + four flimsies—there! Twenty pounds, you idiot! There!” + </p> + <p> + “Mr. Marway, nothing will make me hold my tongue—not even your + promise to drop the thing.” + </p> + <p> + “Then what made you come and cheek me? Impudence?” + </p> + <p> + “Not at all! I should have been glad enough not to have to do it! I came + to you for my own sake.” + </p> + <p> + “That of course!” + </p> + <p> + “I came because I would do nothing underhand!” + </p> + <p> + “What are you going to do next, then?” + </p> + <p> + “I am going to tell Mr. Shotover, or Admiral Marway—I haven't yet + made up my mind which.” + </p> + <p> + “What are you going to tell them?” + </p> + <p> + “That old Lewin has given you three months to get engaged to Miss + Shotover, or take the consequences of not being able to pay what you owe + him.” + </p> + <p> + “And you don't count it underhand to carry such a tale?” + </p> + <p> + “I do not. It would have been if I hadn't told you first. I would tell + Miss Shotover, only, if she be anything of a girl, she wouldn't believe + me.” + </p> + <p> + “I should think not! Come, come, be reasonable! I always thought you a + good sort of fellow, though I <i>was</i> rough on you, I confess. There! + take the money, and leave me my chance.” + </p> + <p> + “No. I will save the lady if I can. She shall at least know the sort of + man you are.” + </p> + <p> + “Then it's war to the knife, is it?” + </p> + <p> + “I mean to tell the truth about you.” + </p> + <p> + “Then do your worst. You shall black my boots again.” + </p> + <p> + “If I do, I shall have the penny first.” + </p> + <p> + “You cringing flunkey!” + </p> + <p> + “I haven't cringed to you, Mr. Marway!” + </p> + <p> + Marway tried to kick him, failed, and strode into the dark between him and + the lamps of the town. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0062" id="link2HCH0062"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LXII. The cage of the puma. + </h2> + <p> + Marway was a fine, handsome fellow, whose manners, where he saw reason, + soon won him favour, and two of the young men in the office were his ready + slaves. Every moment of the next day Clare was watched. Marway had laid + his plans, and would forestall frustration. Clare could hardly do anything + before the dinner-hour, but Marway would make assurance double sure. + </p> + <p> + At anchor in the roads lay a certain frigate, whose duty it was to sail + round the islands, like a duck about her floating brood. Among the young + officers on board were two with whom Marway was intimate. He had met them + the night before, and they had together laid a plot for nullifying Clare's + interference with Marway's scheme—which his friends also had reason + to wish successful, for Marway owed them both money. Clare had come in the + way of all three. + </p> + <p> + Now little Ann was a guardian cherub to the object of their enmity, and he + and she must first of all be separated. Clare had asked leave of Miss + Shotover to take the child to Noah's ark, as she called it, that evening, + and Marway had learned it from her: Clare's going would favour their plan, + but the child's presence would render it impracticable. + </p> + <p> + One thing in their favour was, that Mr. Shotover was from home. If Clare + had resolved on telling him rather than the admiral, he could not until + the next evening, and that would give them abundant time. On the other + hand, having him watched, they could easily prevent him from finding the + admiral. But Clare had indeed come to the just conclusion that his master + had the first right to know what he had to tell. His object was not the + exposure of Marway, but the protection of his master's daughter: he would, + therefore, wait Mr. Shotover's return. He said to himself also, that + Marway would thereby have a chance to bethink himself, and, like Hamlet's + uncle, “try what repentance can.” + </p> + <p> + As soon as he had put the bank in order for the night, he went to find his + little companion, and take her to Noah's ark. The child had been sitting + all the morning and afternoon in a profound stillness of expectation; but + the hour came and passed, and Clare did not appear. + </p> + <p> + “You never, never, never came,” she said to him afterward. “I had to go to + bed, and the beasts went away.” + </p> + <p> + It was many long weeks before she told him this, or her solemn little + visage smiled again. + </p> + <p> + He went to the little room off the hall, where he almost always found her + waiting for him, dressed to go. She was not there. Nobody came. He grew + impatient, and ran in his eagerness up the front stair. At the top he met + the butler coming from the drawing-room—a respectable old man, who + had been in the family as long as his master. + </p> + <p> + “Pardon me, Mr. Porson,” said the butler, who was especially polite to + Clare, recognizing in him the ennoblement of his own order, “but it is + against the rules for any of the gentlemen below to come up this + staircase.” + </p> + <p> + “I know I'm in the wrong,” answered Clare; “but I was in such a hurry I + ventured this once. I've been waiting for Miss Ann twenty minutes.” + </p> + <p> + “If you will go down, I will make inquiry, and let you know directly,” + replied the butler. + </p> + <p> + Clare went down, and had not waited more than another minute when the + butler brought the message that the child was not to go out. In vain Clare + sought an explanation; the old man knew nothing of the matter, but + confessed that Miss Shotover seemed a little put out. + </p> + <p> + Then Clare saw that his desire to do justice had thwarted his endeavour: + Marway had seen Miss Shotover, he concluded, and had so thoroughly + prejudiced her against anything he might say, that she had already taken + the child from him! He repented that he had told him his purpose before he + was ready to follow it up with immediate action. Distressed at the thought + of little Ann's disappointment, he set out for the show, glad in the midst + of his grief, that he was going to see Pummy once more. + </p> + <p> + The weather had been a little cloudy all day, but as he left the closer + part of the town, the vaporous vault gave way, and the west revealed a + glorious sunset. Troubled for the trouble of little Ann, Clare seemed + drawn into the sunset. The splendour said to him: “Go on; sorrow is but a + cloud. Do the work given you to do, and the clouds will keep moving; stop + your work and the clouds will settle down hard.” + </p> + <p> + “When I was on the tramp,” thought Clare, “I always went on, and that's + how I came here. If I hadn't gone on, I should never have found the + darling!” + </p> + <p> + As little as during any day's tramp did he know how his reflection was + going to be justified. + </p> + <p> + He wandered on, and the minutes passed slowly: it was wandering now with + no child in his arms! He was in no haste to go to the menagerie; he would + be in good time for the beasts; and the later he was, the sooner he would + see his mother alone and have a talk with her! + </p> + <p> + At last, it being now quite dark, he turned, and made for the caravans. + </p> + <p> + A crowd was going up the steps, passing Mrs. Halliwell slowly, and + descending into the area surrounded by the beasts. Clare went up, and laid + his money on the little white table. The good woman took it with a smile, + threw it in her wooden bowl, and handed him, as if it had been his change, + three bright sovereigns. Clare turned his face away. He could not take + them. He felt as if it would break one bond between them. + </p> + <p> + “The money's your own!” she said, in a low voice. + </p> + <p> + “By and by, mother!” he answered. + </p> + <p> + “No, no, take it now,” she insisted, in an almost angry whisper; but the + same moment threw the sovereigns among the silver, and some coppers that + lay on the table over them. + </p> + <p> + Judging by her look that he had better say nothing, he turned and went + down the steps. Before he reached the bottom of them, Glum Gunn elbowed + his way past him, throwing a scowl on him from his ugly eyes at the range + of a few inches. + </p> + <p> + The place was fuller than it had been all the evening, and with a rougher + sort of company. The show would close in about an hour. It seemed to Clare + not so well lighted as usual. Perhaps that was why he did not observe that + he was watched and followed by Marway, with two others, and one burly, + middle-aged, sailor-looking fellow. But I doubt whether he would have seen + them in any light, for he had no suspicions, and was not ready to analyze + a crowd and distinguish individuals. + </p> + <p> + He avoided making straight for Pummy, contenting himself for the moment + with an occasional glimpse of him between the moving heads, now opening a + vista, now closing it again, for he hoped to get gradually nearer unseen, + so as to be close to the animal when first he should descry him, for he + dreaded attracting attention by becoming, while yet at a distance, the + object of an uproarious outbreak of affection on the part of the puma. + </p> + <p> + But while he was yet a good way from him, a most ferocious yell sprang + full grown into the air, which the very fibres of his body knew as one of + the cries of the puma when most enraged. There he was on his hind legs, + ramping against the front of the cage, every hair on him bristling, his + tail lashing his flanks. The same instant arose a commotion in the crowd + behind Clare, a pushing and stooping and swaying to and fro, with shouts + of, “Here he is! here he is!” + </p> + <p> + Filled with a foreboding that was almost a prescience, he fell to forcing + his way without ceremony, and had got a little nearer to the puma, when, + elbowing roughly through the spectators, with red, evil face, in drink but + not drunk, Glum Gunn appeared, almost between him and the cage—once + more, to the horror of Clare, holding by the neck his poor little Abdiel, + curled up into the shape of a flea. The brute was making his way with him + to the cage of the puma, whose wrath, grown to an indescribable frenzy, + now blazed point-blank at the dog. + </p> + <p> + I think some waft of the wild odour of the menagerie must have reached the + nostrils of the loving creature, brought back old times and his master, + and waked the hope of finding him. That he had but just arrived was plain, + for he had not had time to get to his master. + </p> + <p> + Clare was almost at the edge of the close-packed, staring crowd, absorbed + in the sight of the huge raving cat. Breaking through its outermost ring + in the strength of sudden terror, he darted to the cage to reach it before + Glum Gunn. A man crossed and hustled him. Gunn opened the door of the + cage, and flung Abdiel to the puma. Ere he could close it, Clare struck + him once more a stout left-hander on the side of his head. Gunn staggered + back. Clare sprang into the cage—just as Pummy spying him uttered a + jubilant roar of recognition. His jumping into the cage just prevented the + puma from getting out, and the crowd from trampling each other to death to + escape The Christians' Friend; but now that Clare was in, the cage-door + might have swung all night open unheeded—so long, that is, as no dog + appeared. + </p> + <p> + As for Abdiel the puma had forgotten him: the dog was out of his sight for + the moment, though only behind him, while his friend and he were rubbing + recognizant noses. Abdiel showed his wisdom by keeping in the background. + The moment he was flung into the cage, he had got into a corner of it, and + stood up on his hind legs. + </p> + <p> + His master believed that, knowing how the puma loved the human form + divine, he thought to prejudice him in his favour by showing how near he + could come to it. There he yet stood, his head sunk on his chest, watching + out of his eyes for the terrible moment when his enemy should again catch + sight of him. + </p> + <p> + The moment came. The puma's delight had broken out in wildest motion. He + sprang to the roof of his cage, and grappling there, looked down with + retorted neck, and saw the dog. Poor Abdiel immediately raised his head, + and in hope of propitiation all but forlorn, began a little dance his + master had taught him. + </p> + <p> + What Pummy would have done with him, I fear, but I cannot tell. Clare + sprang to the rescue, and the weight of the puma's bulk descended, not on + Abdiel, but on the shoulders of Clare who had the dog in his bosom. In a + moment more it was evidenced that a common love, however often the cause + of jealousy, is the most powerful mediator between the generous. The puma + forgot his hate, the dog forgot his fear, and presently, to the admiration + of the crowd, Clare and Pummy and Abby were rolling over and over each + other on the floor of the cage. + </p> + <p> + Pummy had the best of the rough game. One moment he would be a bend in a + seemingly unloosable knot of confused animality, the next he would be + clinging to the top of his cage, where the others could not follow him. + Perhaps to have a human to play with, was even better than dreams of + loveliest frolics with brothers and sisters, and a mother as madly merry + as they, in still, moonlit nights among the rocks, where neither sound nor + scent of horse woke the devil in any of their bosoms! + </p> + <p> + Glum Gunn, too angry to speak, stood watching with a scowl fit for Lucifer + when he rose from his first fall from heaven. He could do nothing! If he + touched one, all three would be upon him! Experience had taught him what + the puma would do in defence of Clare! He must bide his time!—But he + must keep hold of his chance! He drew from his pocket his master-key, and + at a moment when Clare was under the other two, slid it into the key-hole, + and locked the door of the cage. He had him now—and his beast of a + dog too! If he could have turned the puma mad, and made him tear them both + to shreds, he would not have delayed an instant. But he must think! He + must say, like Hamlet, “About, my brains!” + </p> + <p> + The man, however, who wishes to do evil, will find as ready helpers as he + who wishes to do well: in the place were those who wanted Gunn's aid, and + would give him theirs. + </p> + <p> + He felt a touch on his arm, glanced sullenly round, and saw a face under + whose beauty lay the devil. Marway, with eye and thumb, requested him to + withdraw for a moment, and he did not hesitate. As he went he chuckled to + himself at the thought of Clare when he found the door locked. + </p> + <p> + Marway's three accomplices had drifted off one by one to wait him outside: + he rejoined them with Gunn; and, retiring a little way from the caravans, + the five held a council, the results of which make an important part of + Clare's history. + </p> + <p> + Clare seemed absorbed in his game with his four-footed, one-tailed + friends, but he was wide awake: he had Abdiel to deliver, and kept, + therefore, all the time, at least half an eye on Glum Gunn. He saw Marway + come up to him, and saw them retire together: it was the very moment to + leave the cage with Abdiel! He rose, not without difficulty, because of + the jumping of his playmates upon him and over him, and went to the door. + </p> + <p> + The moment he did so, the crowd was greatly amused to see the puma turn + upon the dog with a snarl, and the dog, at the fearful sound of altered + mood, immediately put on the man, rise to one pair of feet, and begin to + dance. The puma turned from him, went to the heel of his chosen master, + and there stood. + </p> + <p> + In vain Clare endeavoured to open the gate. He had never known it locked, + and could not think when it had been done. At length, amid the laughter of + the spectators, he desisted, and the three resumed their frolics. + </p> + <p> + At this the admiration of the visitors broke out. They had seen the door + made fast, and had kept pretty quiet, waiting what would come: they had + thus earned their amusement when he sought in vain to open it. When his + withdrawal confessed him foiled, the merrier began to mock and the ruder + to jeer. But when they saw him laugh, and all three return to their + gambols, they applauded heartily. + </p> + <p> + Just before this last portion of the entertainment, Mr. Halliwell, who had + been looking on for a while, retired, not knowing the cage-door was + locked. He went to his wife and said, that, if they had but the boy and + his dog again, and were but free of that brother of his, the menagerie + would be a wild-beast paradise. He would have had her go and see the + pranks in the puma's cage, but she was too tired, she said; so he strolled + out with his pipe, and left his men to close the exhibition. Mrs. + Halliwell fastened her door and went to bed, a little hurt that Clare did + not come to her. + </p> + <p> + Gradually the folk thinned away; and at last only a few who had got in at + half-price remained. To them the attendants hinted that they were going to + shut shop, and one by one they shuffled out, the readier that Clare was + now so tired that Pummy could not get up the merest tail of a lark more. + He was quite fresh himself, and had he been out in the woods, would + certainly not have gone home till morning. But he was such a human + creature that he would not insist when he saw Clare was weary; and that he + had no inclination to play with Abdiel when his master was out of the + game, was quite as well for Abdiel, for Pummy might have forgot himself. + When Abby, not free from fear, as knowing well he was not free from + danger, crept to his master's bosom, Pummy gave a low growl, and shoving + his nose under the long body of the dog, with one jerk threw him a yard + off upon the floor, whence Abdiel returned to content himself with his + master's feet, abandoning the place of honour to one who knew himself + stronger, and probably counted himself better. So they all fell asleep in + peace. For although Clare knew himself and Abdiel Gunn's prisoners, he + feared no surprise with two such rousable companions. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0063" id="link2HCH0063"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LXIII. The dome of the angels. + </h2> + <p> + When Clare awoke, he knew he had been asleep a long time. It was, + notwithstanding, quite dark, and there was something wrong with him. His + head ached: it had never ached before. He put out his hands: Pummy's hairy + body was nowhere near. He called Abdiel: no whimper answered; no cold nose + was thrust into his hand. He had gone to sleep, surely between his two + friends! Could he have only dreamed it? + </p> + <p> + Why was the darkness so thick? There must surely be light in the clouds by + this time! He felt half awake and half dreaming. + </p> + <p> + What was the curious motion he grew aware of? Was something trying to keep + him asleep, or was something trying to wake him? Had they put him in a big + cradle? Were they heaving him about to rouse him? Or could it be a gentle + earthquake that was rocking him to and fro? Would it wake up in earnest + presently, and pull and push, and shake and rattle, until the dome of the + angels came shivering down upon him? + </p> + <p> + Where was he? Not on the hard floor of Pummy's cage, but on something much + harder—like iron. Was he in the wagon in which they carried the + things for setting up the show? Something had happened to him, and his + mother was taking him with her! But in that case he would be lying softer! + <i>She</i> would not have given him a bed so full of aches! + </p> + <p> + What would they think at the bank? What would little Ann think if he came + to her no more? + </p> + <p> + He could not be in a caravan; the motion was much too smooth and pleasant + for that! + </p> + <p> + He put his hand to his face: what was it wet on his cheek? It did not feel + nice; it felt like blood! Had he had a blow on the head? Was that what + gave him this headache? He felt his head all over, but could find no hurt. + </p> + <p> + Why was he lying like a log, wondering and wondering, instead of getting + up and seeing what it all meant? It must be the darkness and the headache + that kept him down! The place was very close! He <i>must</i> get out of + it! + </p> + <p> + He tried to get on his feet, but as he rose, his head struck something, + and he dropped back. He got again on his knees and groped about. On all + sides he was closed in. But he was not shut in a dungeon of stone. He + seemed to be in a great wooden box—small enough to be a box, much + too large for a coffin. Could it be one of the oubliettes in the roof of + the doge's palace at Venice? He laughed at the idea, for the motion + continued, the gentle earthquake that seemed trying to rock him to sleep: + the doge's palace could hardly be afloat on the grand canal! + </p> + <p> + What could it all mean? What would little Ann do without him? She would + not cry: she never cried—at least, he had never seen her cry! but + that would not make it easier for her! + </p> + <p> + What had become of Abdiel? Had Glum Gunn got him? Then the wet on his face + was Abdiel's blood—shed in his defence, perhaps, when his enemies + were taking him away! + </p> + <p> + Fears and anxieties, such as he had never known before, began to crowd + upon him—not for himself; he was not made to think of himself, + either first or second. Something dreadful might be going on that he could + not prevent! He had never been so miserable. It was high time to do + something—to ask the great one somewhere, he did not know where, who + could somehow, he did not know how, hear the thoughts that were not words, + to do what ought to be done for little Ann, and Abdiel, and Pummy! He + prayed in his heart, lay still, and fell fast asleep. + </p> + <p> + He came to himself again, in the act of drawing a deep breath of cool, + delicious air. He was no longer shut in the dark, stifling box. He was + coming alive! A comforting wind blew all about him. It was like a live + thing putting its own life into him. But his eyelids were heavy; he was + unable to open them. + </p> + <p> + All at once they opened of themselves. + </p> + <p> + The dome of the angels had come down and closed in round him, but bringing + room for him, taking none away. It was blue, and filled with the loveliest + white clouds, possessed by a blowing wind that never was able to blow them + away. They were of strangely regular shapes; not the less were they alive—piled + one above the other, up and up—up ever so high! They all kept their + places, and some had the loveliest blue shadows upon them, which glided + about a little. But the dome of the angels rose high, and ever higher + still, above them. The dome of the angels was at home, and the clouds were + at home in it. He gazed entranced at the sight. Then came a sudden strong + heave and roll of the earthquake, and a light shone in his eyes that + blinded him. + </p> + <p> + It was but the strong friendly sun. When Clare opened his eyes again, he + knew that he was lying on the deck of one of the great ships he had so + frequently looked at from the shore. Oh, how often had he not longed after + this one and that one of them, as if in some one somewhere, perhaps in + that one, lay something he could not do without, which yet he could never + set his eyes, not to say his hands upon. He had his heart's desire, and + what was to come of it? He lay on the ship, and the ship lay on the sea, a + little world afloat on the water, moving as a planet moves through the + heavens, but carrying her own heaven with her, attended by her own clouds, + bearing her whither she would. Up into those clouds he lay gazing, up into + the dome of the angels, drawing deeper and deeper breaths of gladness, too + happy to think—when a foot came with a kick in the ribs, and a voice + ordered him to get up: was he going to lie there till the frigate was paid + off? + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0064" id="link2HCH0064"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LXIV. The panther. + </h2> + <p> + Clare scrambled to his feet, and surveyed the man who had thus roused him. + He had a vague sense of having seen him before, but could not remember + where. Feeling faint, and finding himself beside a gun, he leaned upon it. + </p> + <p> + The sailor regarded him with an insolent look. + </p> + <p> + “Wake up,” he said, “an' come along to the cap'n. What's the service a + comin' to, I should like to know, when a beggarly shaver like you has the + cheek to stow hisself away on board one o' his majesty's frigates! Wouldn' + nothin' less suit your highness than a berth on the Panther?” + </p> + <p> + “Is that the name of the ship?” asked Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, that's the name of the ship!” returned the man, mimicking him. + “You'll have the Panther, his mark, on the back o' <i>you</i> presently! + Come along, I say, to the cap'n! We ha' got to ask <i>him</i>, what's to + be done wi' rascals as rob their masters, an' then stow theirselves away + on board his majesty's ships!” + </p> + <p> + “Take me to the captain,” said Clare. + </p> + <p> + The man seemed for a moment to doubt whether there might not be some + mistake: he had expected to see him cringe. But he took him by the collar + behind, and pushed him along to the quarter-deck, where an elderly officer + was pacing up and down alone. + </p> + <p> + “Well, Tom,” said the captain, stopping in his walk, “what's the matter? + Who's that you've got?” + </p> + <p> + “Please yer honour,” answered the boatswain, giving Clare a shove, “this + here's a stowaway in his majesty's ship, Panther. I found him snug in the + cable-tier.—Salute the captain, you beggar!” + </p> + <p> + Clare had no cap to lift, but he bowed like the gentleman he was. The + captain stood looking at him. Clare returned his gaze, and smiled. A sort + of tremble, much like that in the level air on a hot summer day, went over + the captain's face, and he looked harder at Clare. + </p> + <p> + A sound arose like the purring of an enormous cat, and, sure enough, it + was nothing else: chained to the foot of the forward binnacle stood a + panther, a dark yellow creature with black spots, bigger than Pummy, + swinging his tail. Clare turned at the noise he made. The panther made a + bound and a leap to the height and length of his chain, and uttered a cry + like a musical yawn. Clare stretched out his arms, and staggered toward + him. The next moment the animal had him. The captain darted to the rescue. + But the beast was only licking him wherever there was a bare spot to lick; + and Clare wondered to find how many such spots there were: he was in rags! + The panther kept tossing him over and over as if he were a baby, licking + as he tossed, and in his vibrating body and his whole behaviour manifested + an exceeding joy. The captain stood staring “like one that hath been + stunned.” + </p> + <p> + The boatswain was not astonished: he had seen Clare at home among wild + animals, and thought the panther was taken with the wild-beast smell about + him. + </p> + <p> + “I beg your pardon, sir,” said Clare, rolling himself out of the panther's + reach, and rising to his feet, “but wild things like me, somehow! I slept + with a puma last night. He and this panther, sir, would have a terrible + fight if they met!” + </p> + <p> + The captain threw a look of disappointment at the panther. + </p> + <p> + “Go forward, Tom,” he said. + </p> + <p> + The man did not like the turn things had taken, and as he went wore + something of the look of one doomed to make the acquaintance of another + kind of cat. + </p> + <p> + “What made you come on board this ship, my lad?” asked the captain, in a + voice so quiet that it sounded almost kind. + </p> + <p> + “I did not come on board, sir.” + </p> + <p> + “Don't trifle with <i>me</i>,” returned the captain sternly. + </p> + <p> + Clare looked straight at him, and said— + </p> + <p> + “I have done nothing wrong, sir. I know you will help me. I fell asleep + last night, as I told you, sir, in the cage of a puma. I knew him, of + course! How I came awake on board your ship, I know no more than you do, + sir.” + </p> + <p> + The smile of Clare's childhood had scarcely altered, and it now shone full + on the captain. He turned away, and made a tack or two on the + quarter-deck. He was a tall, thin man, with a graceful carriage, and a + little stoop in the shoulders. He had a handsome, sad face, growing old. + His hair was more than half way to gray, and he seemed somewhere about + fifty. He had the sternness of a man used to command, but under the + sternness Clare saw the sadness. + </p> + <p> + The attention of the boy was now somewhat divided between the captain and + his panther, which seemed possessed with a fierce desire to get at him, + though plainly with no inimical intent. The attention of the captain + seemed divided between the boy and the panther; his eyes now rested for a + moment on the animal, now turned again to the boy. Two officers on the + port side of the quarter-deck stole glances at the strange group—the + stately, solemn, still man; the ragged creature before him, who looked in + his face without fear or anxiety, and with just as little presumption; and + the wildly excited panther, whose fierce bounding alternated with cringing + abasement of his beautiful person, accompanied by loving sweeps of his + most expressive tail. + </p> + <p> + The captain made a tack or two more on the quarter-deck, then turned sharp + on the boy. + </p> + <p> + “What is your name?” he asked. + </p> + <p> + “I don't quite know, sir,” answered Clare. + </p> + <p> + “Come with me,” said the captain. + </p> + <p> + To the surprise of the officers, he led the way to his state-room, and the + boy followed. The panther gave a howl as Clare disappeared. The officers + remarked that the captain looked strange. His lips were compressed as if + with vengeance, but the muscles of his face were twitching. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0065" id="link2HCH0065"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LXV. At home. + </h2> + <p> + Clare followed, wondering, but nowise anxious. He saw nothing to make him + anxious. The captain looked a good man, and a good man was a friend to + Clare! But when he entered the state-room, and saw himself from head to + foot in a mirror let into a bulkhead, he was both startled and ashamed: + how could the captain take such a scarecrow into his room! he thought. He + did not reflect that it was just the sort of thing he did himself. He had + indeed felt dirty and disreputable, and been aware of the dry, rasping + tongue of the panther on many patches of bare skin, but he had had no idea + what a wretched creature he looked. Not one of the garments he saw in the + mirror was his own, and they were disgracefully torn. His hair was + sticking out every way, and his face smeared with blood. His feet were + bare, and one trouser-leg rent to the knee. His enemies had done their + best to ensure prejudice, and frustrate belief. They did not see in his + look what no honest man could misread. Innocent as he knew himself, he + could not help feeling for a moment disconcerted. But his faithfulness + threw him on the mercy of the man before him. + </p> + <p> + The captain turned and sat down. The boy stood in the doorway, staring at + his reflex self in the mirror. The captain understood his consternation. + </p> + <p> + “Come along, my poor boy,” he said. “How did you get into this mess?” + </p> + <p> + “I think I know,” answered Clare, “but I'm not sure.” + </p> + <p> + “You must have been drunk,” sighed the captain. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, no, sir!” returned Clare, with one of his radiant smiles. “I've had + but one glass of beer in my life, and I didn't like it.” + </p> + <p> + The captain smiled too, and gazed at him for several moments without + speaking. + </p> + <p> + “It seems to me,” he said at last, but as if he were thinking of something + quite different, “you must be in want of food.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, no, sir!” answered Clare again, “I'm used to going without.” + </p> + <p> + Like a child the sport of an evil fairy, he was again the boy of the old + wanderings, in the old, hungry times. But did he ever look so lost as in + the mirror before him? he wondered. + </p> + <p> + “You haven't told me——” said the captain, and stopped short, + as if he dreaded going further. + </p> + <p> + “I will tell you anything you want to know, sir. Please ask me.” + </p> + <p> + “You say you did not come on board the frigate: what am I to understand by + that?” + </p> + <p> + “That I was brought, sir, in my sleep. It wouldn't be fair, would it, sir, + to mention names, when I don't know for certain who they were that brought + me? I never knew anything till I opened my eyes, and thought I was in——” + </p> + <p> + He paused. + </p> + <p> + “<i>Where</i> did you think you were?” asked the captain eagerly. + </p> + <p> + “In the dome of the angels, sir,” answered Clare. + </p> + <p> + The captain's face fell. He thought him an innocent, on whom rascals had + been playing a practical joke. But that made no difference! If he were a + simpleton, he might none the less be——! Was <i>her</i> boy + left to——? + </p> + <p> + He shuddered visibly, and again was silent. + </p> + <p> + “Tell me,” he said at length, “what you remember.” + </p> + <p> + He meant—of the circumstances that immediately preceded his coming + to himself on board the Panther; but Clare began with the first thing his + memory presented him with. Perhaps he was yet a little dazed. He had not + got through a single sentence, when he saw that something earlier wanted + telling first; and the same thing happening again and again within the + first five minutes of his narration, sir Harry saw he had before him a boy + either of fertile imagination, or of “strange, eventful history.” But + either supposition had its difficulty. If, on the one hand, he had had the + tenth part of the experiences hinted at; if, for one thing, he had been + but a single month on the tramp, how had he kept such an innocent face, + such an angelic smile? If, on the other hand, he was making up these + tales, why did he not look sharper? and whence the angelic smile? Did the + seeming innocence indicate only such a lack of intellect as occasionally + accompanies a remarkable individual gift? He must make him begin at the + beginning, and tell everything he knew, or might pretend to know about + himself! + </p> + <p> + “Stop,” he said. “You told me you did not quite know your name: what did + they call you as far back as you can remember?” + </p> + <p> + “Clare Porson,” answered the boy. + </p> + <p> + At the first word the captain gave a little cry, but repressed his + emotion, and went on. His face was very white, and his breath came and + went quickly. + </p> + <p> + “Why did you say you did not <i>quite</i> know your name?” + </p> + <p> + “My father and mother called me by their name because there was nobody to + tell them what my real name was.” + </p> + <p> + “Then they weren't your own father and mother that gave you the name?” + </p> + <p> + “No, sir. I'm but using theirs till I get my own. I shall one day.” + </p> + <p> + “Why do you think so?” + </p> + <p> + “Don't <i>you</i> think, sir, that everything will come right one day?” + </p> + <p> + “God grant it!” responded the captain with a groan, self-reproached for + the little faith beside the strong desire. + </p> + <p> + “Do you think it wrong, sir, to use a name that is not quite my own?” said + Clare. “People sometimes seem to think so.” + </p> + <p> + “Not at all, my boy! You must have a name. You did not steal it. They gave + it you.” + </p> + <p> + The look of the boy when he thus answered him, completely restored sir + Harry's confidence in his mental soundness, while both the mode and the + nature of his answer to every question he put to him, bore the strongest + impress of truth. + </p> + <p> + “If the boy be a liar,” he said to himself, “I will never more trust my + kind. I will turn to the wild-beasts, and believe in panthers and hyenas!” + </p> + <p> + “They did, sir,” answered Clare. “Mr. Porson gave me his own name, and he + was a clergyman. So I thought afterwards, when I had to think about it, + that it couldn't be wrong to use it.” + </p> + <p> + But how could sir Harry palter so with himself? He might have got at the + necessary facts so much quicker! + </p> + <p> + Sir Harry shrank from seeing his suddenly wakened hope, dead for many a + year, crumble before his eyes. He dared not yet drive question close. + </p> + <p> + “Did Mr. Porson give you both your names?” he asked. + </p> + <p> + “No, sir. My mother said I brought the first with me. She said I told them—I + don't remember myself—that my name was Clare.” + </p> + <p> + The captain drove back the words that threatened to break from his lips in + spite of him. His boy's name was Clarence, but his mother, whose dearest + friend was a <i>Clara</i>, called her child always <i>Clare</i>! + </p> + <p> + “I mean my second mother, sir,” explained Clare; “my own mother is in the + dome of the angels.” + </p> + <p> + A flash lightened from the captain's eyes, but he seemed to himself to + have gone blind. Clare saw the flash, and wondered. + </p> + <p> + Again <i>the dome of the angels</i>! The words burst into meaning. Out of + the depths of the world of life rose to his mind's eye the terrible thing + that had made him a lonely man. Again he stood with his head thrown back, + looking up at the Assumption of the Virgin painted in that awful dome; + again the earthquake seized the church, and shook the painted heaven down + upon them. He knew no more. His little boy had been standing near him, + holding his mother's hand, but staring up like his father! + </p> + <p> + He had to force the next words from his throat. + </p> + <p> + “Where did the good people who gave you their name find you?” + </p> + <p> + “Sitting on my mother—my own mother. The angels fell down on her, + and when they went up again, she had got mixed with them, and went up + too.” + </p> + <p> + Some people thought my friend Skymer “a little queer, you know!” I leave + my reader to his own thought: he will judge after his kind. Clare's father + no longer doubted his perfect faculty. + </p> + <p> + All through Clare's life, as often as the old, vague, but ever ready + vision brought back its old feelings, with them came the old thoughts, the + old forms of them, and the old words their attendant shadows; and then + Clare talked like a child. + </p> + <p> + The stern, sorrowful man hid his face In his hands. + </p> + <p> + “Grace,” he murmured—and Clare knew somehow that he spoke to his + wife, “we have him again! We will never distrust him more!” + </p> + <p> + His frame heaved with the choking of his sobs. + </p> + <p> + Then Clare understood that the grand man was his father. The awe of a + perfect gladness fell upon him. He knelt before him, and laid his hands + together as in prayer. + </p> + <p> + “Why did you distrust me, father?” said the half-naked outcast. + </p> + <p> + “It was not my child, it was my father I distrusted. I am ashamed,” said + sir Harry, and clasped him in his arms. + </p> + <p> + The boy laid his blood-stained face against his father's bosom, and his + soul was in a better home than a sky full of angels, a home better than + the dome itself of all the angels, for his home was his father's heart. + </p> + <p> + How long they remained thus I cannot tell. It seemed to both as if so it + had been from eternity, and so to eternity it would be. When a thing is as + it should be, then we know it is from eternity to eternity. The true is. + </p> + <p> + The father relaxed at length the arms that strained his child to his + heart. Clare looked up with white, luminous face. He gazed at his father, + cried like little Ann, “You're come!” and slid to his feet. He clasped and + kissed and clung to them—would hardly let them go. + </p> + <p> + All this time the officers on the quarter-deck were wondering what the + captain could have to do with the beggarly stowaway. The panther stood on + his feet, anxiously waiting, his ears starting at every sound. He was + longing for the boy with whom he had played, panther cub with human + infant, in the years long gone by. The sweet airs of his childhood were to + the panther plainly recognizable through all the accretions that + disfigured but could not defile him. The two were the same age. They had + rolled on floor and deck together when neither could hurt—and now + neither would. For the animal was perfectly harmless, and chained only + because apt to be unseasonably frolicsome. When they let him loose, it was + a season of high jinks and rare skylarking. Then the men had to look out! + He had twice knocked a man overboard, and had once tumbled overboard + himself. But he had never killed a creature, was always gentle with + children, and might be trusted to look after any infant. + </p> + <p> + Sir Harry raised his son, kissed him, set him on his own chair, and + retired into an inner cabin. + </p> + <p> + A knock came to the door. Clare said, “Come in.” The quartermaster + entered. Instead of sir Harry, he saw the miserable stowaway, seated in + the captain's own chair. He swore at him, and ordered him out, prepared to + give him a kick as he passed. + </p> + <p> + “Out with you!” he cried. “Go for'ard. Tell the bo's'n to look out a + rope's end. I'll be after you.” + </p> + <p> + “The captain told me to sit here,” answered Clare, and sat. + </p> + <p> + The officer looked closer at him, begged his pardon, saluted, and + withdrew. + </p> + <p> + The father heard, and said to himself, “The boy is a gentleman: he knows + where to take his orders.” + </p> + <p> + He called him into the inner cabin, and there washed him from head to + foot, rejoicing to find under his rags a skin as clean as his own. + </p> + <p> + “Now what are we to do for clothes, Clare?” said sir Harry. + </p> + <p> + “Perhaps somebody would lend me some,” answered Clare. “Mayn't I be your + cabin-boy, father? You will let me be a sailor, won't you, and sail always + with you?” + </p> + <p> + “You shall be a sailor, my boy,” answered sir Harry, “and sail with me as + long as God pleases. You know to obey orders!” + </p> + <p> + “I will obey the cook if you tell me, father.” + </p> + <p> + “You shall obey nobody but myself,” returned sir Harry; “—and the + lord high admiral,” he added, with a glance upward, and a smile like his + son's. + </p> + <p> + For that day Clare kept to the captain's state-room; the next, he went on + deck in a midshipman's uniform, which he wore like a gentleman that could + obey orders. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2HCH0066" id="link2HCH0066"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Chapter LXVI. The end of Clare Skymer's boyhood. + </h2> + <p> + His father had a hammock slung for him in the state-room; he could not be + parted from him even when they slept. + </p> + <p> + One night sir Harry, lying awake, heard a movement in the state-room, and + got up. It was a still, star-lit night. The frigate was dreaming away + northward with all sail set. Through the windows shone the level stars. + From a beam above hung a dim lamp. He could see no one. He went to the + hammock. There was no boy in it. Then he spied him, kneeling under the + stern-windows, with his head down. + </p> + <p> + “Anything the matter, Clare?” he asked. + </p> + <p> + “No, father.” + </p> + <p> + “What are you doing?” + </p> + <p> + “Trying to say <i>Thank you for my father!</i>” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, thank him, thank him, my boy!” returned sir Harry. “Thank him with + all your heart. He will give us <i>her</i> some day!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, father, he will!” responded Clare. + </p> + <p> + His father knelt beside him, but neither said word that the other heard. + </p> + <p> + The next night, Clare was on the quarter-deck with his father, and heard + him give certain orders to the officers of the watch. He had never heard + orders given in such a way: he spoke so quietly, so directly, so simply! + The night was gusty and dark, threatening foul weather. The captain + measured the quarter-deck as when first Clare saw him, but with a mien how + different! He walked as slow and stately as before, but with a look almost + of triumph in his eyes, glancing often at the clouds. The thought of + having such a father made Clare tremble with delight from head to foot. + His father was the power of the sea-planet that bore them! Him the great + vessel, and all aboard of her, obeyed! He was the life of her motions, the + soul of her! At his pleasure she bowed her obedient head, and swept over + the seas! Clare's heart swelled within him. + </p> + <p> + But this father had, the night before, knelt with him in the presence of + one unseen, worshipping and thanking a higher than himself! As the captain + of the Panther sailed his frigate through the seas, so the great father, + the father of his father, the father of all fathers, to whom the captain + kneeled as a little child, sailed through the heaven of heavens the huge + ship of the world, guided fleet upon fleet innumerable through trackless + space! And over an infinitely grander sea than the measureless ocean of + worlds, the Father was carrying navies of human souls, every soul a world + whose affairs none but the Father could understand, through many a storm, + and waterspout, and battle with the powers of evil, safe to the haven of + the children, the Father's house! And Clare began to understand that so it + was. + </p> + <p> + One day his father said to him— + </p> + <p> + “Clare, whatever you forget, whatever you remember, mind this—that + you and I and your mother are the children of one father, and that we have + all three to be good children to that father. If we do as he tells us, he + will bring us all at length to the same port. Our admiral is Jesus Christ. + We take our orders from him. But each has to sail his own ship.” + </p> + <p> + The boatswain shook in his wide shoes, but Clare never showed him the + least disfavour. He recognized at once the two officers he had seen at the + menagerie, but beyond giving each a look he could hardly mistake, he + showed no sign of having any knowledge of them. + </p> + <p> + He set himself to be a sailor, and learned fast. I need scarcely say he + was as precise in obeying any superior officer as the best sailor on + board. In a few weeks he felt and looked to the manner born—as + indeed he was, for not only his father, but his grandfather, and his + great-grandfather, and more yet of his ancestors,—how many I do not + know, were sailors. + </p> + <p> + He had had a rough shaking. The earthquake had come and gone, and come + again and gone a many times. But the shaking earth was his nurse, and she + taught him to dwell in a world that cannot be shaken. + </p> + <div style="height: 6em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Rough Shaking, by George MacDonald + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A ROUGH SHAKING *** + +***** This file should be named 8886-h.htm or 8886-h.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/8/8/8/8886/ + + +Text file produced by Distributed Proofreaders + +HTML file produced by David Widger + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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